' 'j 
 
 
 ! 
 
 
 1
 
 L I E) RARY 
 
 OF THE 
 
 U N IVER5 ITY 
 
 or ILLI NOIS 
 
 1863 
 
 V.I
 
 UNIVERSITY LIBRARY 
 
 UNIVERSITY OF ,U,NO,S AT URBANA-SlVIPmGN 
 
 bound journals '^"^ " *^25.00, $300.00 for 
 
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 OCT 152«
 
 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES 
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS: 
 
 WHO WAS A SOLDIER, A SAILOR, A MERCHANT, A SPY, A SLAVE 
 
 AMONG THE MOORS, A BASHAW IN THE SERVICE 
 
 OF THE GRAND TURK, 
 
 u)i ut last in ^h ofon '§au^t in '§mobtx ^qmxt, 
 
 A NARRATIVE IN OLD-FASHIONED ENGLISH. 
 
 ATTEMPTED BX 
 
 GEORGE AUGUSTUS SALA. 
 
 IN THKEE VOLUMES. 
 VOL. I. 
 
 LONDON : 
 TINSLEY BROTHERS, 18, CATHERINE STREET, STRAND. 
 
 1863. 
 
 [_The right of Translation is reserved. 2
 
 LOUDOK: 
 
 bavhl and edwabds, pbinxebb, 
 chandos etbebt.
 
 1 
 
 
 
 ^>3 
 
 ^T'^ TO 
 
 ? ALEXANDER MUNRO, 
 
 THIS BOOK, 
 
 IN TOKEN OF SINCERE AND ADMIRING FRIENDSHIP, IS 
 CORDIALLY INSCRIBED.
 
 Digitized by the Internet Archive 
 
 in 2010 with funding from 
 
 University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign 
 
 http://www.archive.org/details/strangeadventure01sala
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 In the last century — and many centuries 
 "before the last ; but it is about the eighteenth 
 that I am specially speaking — long before 
 steamers and railways, or even frigate-built 
 ships and flying coaches were dreamt of, 
 when an Englishman went abroad, he 
 ;stopped there. When he came back, if at all, 
 it was, as a rule, grizzled and sunburnt, his na- 
 tive habits all unlearnt, and his native tongue 
 more than half forgotten. Even the Grand 
 Tour, with all that money could purchase in 
 the way of couriers and post-horses, to ex- 
 pedite matters for my Lord, his chaplain, his 
 courier, and his dancing master, took as 
 many years as it now does months to accom- 
 
 A
 
 VI PREFACE. 
 
 plish. There were no young novelists in 
 those days to make a flying-trip to the 
 Gaboon country, to ascertain whether the 
 stories told by former tourists about shooting 
 gorillas were fibs or not. There were no 
 English engineers, fresh from Great George 
 Street, Westminster, writing home to the 
 AthencBum to say that they had just opened 
 a branch railway up to Ephesus, and that 
 (by the way) they had discovered a prse- 
 Imperial temple of Juno the day before 
 yesterday. Unprotected females didn't venture 
 in " unwhisperables " into the depths of 
 JSTorvvegian forests ; or, if they hazarded 
 such undertakings their unprotectedness led 
 them often to fall into cruel hands, and they 
 never returned. A great fuss used to be 
 made, before the days of steam, about the 
 '' Fair Sophia," who undertook a journey 
 from Turkey to discover her lover, Lord 
 Bateman ; but liow long and wearisome was 
 her travail before she reached his lordship's 
 castle in Northumberland, and was informed
 
 PREFACE. Vll 
 
 by the " proud young porter " that he was 
 just then " taking of his young bride in" ? 
 Madame Cottin s EHzabeth, when she walked 
 from Tobolsk to St. Petersburg to crave 
 pardon for the exiles of Siberia ; Sir Walter 
 Scott's Jeanie Deans, when she tramped from 
 Edinburgh to London on her errand of 
 mercy, were justly regarded as heroines. 
 Eut what were the achievements of those 
 valorous young women when compared with 
 the Ladies who make tours round Monte 
 Eosa ; nay, for the matter of that, " all round 
 the world" ? // riy a plus de Pyrenees. Nay, 
 there are no more Andes, Himalayas, or 
 Eocky Mountains. When the late Mr. Albert 
 Smith wanted to change the attractions of 
 his show, he calmly took a trip from 
 Piccadilly to Hong Kong; it would have been 
 better for him, poor dear fellow, had he 
 remained at home. When her Majesty wanted 
 to show the late Sultan of Turkey a slight 
 act of civility, she sent Sir Charles Young 
 out to Constantinople to invest Abdul 
 A 2
 
 Vlll PREFACE. 
 
 Medjid with the Order of the Garter. Thirty 
 years ago, it is possible the estimable King 
 of Arms might have thought a mail-coach 
 journey to York a somewhat serious ex- 
 pedition, yet he took the P. and 0. Boat 
 for Stamboul as blithely as though he were 
 bound for a water-party at Grreenwich. If an 
 Emperor is to be crowned in Eussia, or 
 Prussia, or Grim Tartary, all the London 
 newspapers despatch special correspondents 
 to the scene of the pageant. Mr. Eeuter 
 will soon have completed his Overland 
 Telegraph to China. At Liverpool they call 
 New York " over the way." The Prince of 
 Wales's travels in his nonage have made 
 Telemachus a tortoise, and the young 
 Anacharsis a stay-at-home. IMarried couples 
 spend their honeymoon hippopotamus 
 hunting in Abyssinia, or exploring the 
 sources of the Nile. And the Traveller's Club 
 are obliged to blackball nine-tenths of the 
 candidates put up for election, because now- 
 a-days almost every tolerably educated
 
 PREFACE. IX 
 
 Englishman has travelled more than six 
 hundred miles in a straight direction from 
 the British Metropolis. 
 
 Bearing these facts in mind, the travels of 
 Captain Dangerous, widely extended as they 
 were, may not appear to the present gene- 
 ration as very uncommon or very surprising. 
 But such travellers as my hero, formed, in the 
 last century, a class apart, and were, in most 
 cases, very strange men. Diplomatic agents 
 belonging to the aristocracy rarely ventured 
 beyond the confines of Europe. The Am- 
 bassadors sent to eastern climes were 
 usually, although accredited from the Eng- 
 lish Court, maintained at the charge of great 
 commercial corporations, such as the Turkey 
 and Eussia Companies, and were selected 
 less on the score of their having handles to 
 their names, or being born Eussells, Greys, 
 and Elliots, than because they had led rov- 
 ing and adventurous lives, and had fought 
 in or traded with the countries where they 
 were appointed to reside. Beyond these, the
 
 X PREFACE. 
 
 travellmg class was made up of merchants, 
 buccaneers, spies, and, notably, of political 
 adventurers, and English, Scotch, and Irish 
 Bomanist Priests. The unhappy political 
 dissensions which raged in this country 
 from the time of the Great Kebellion to the 
 accession of George the Third, and the in- 
 famous penal laws against the Eoman Catho- 
 lics, periodically drove into banishment vast 
 numbers of loyal gentlemen and their fami- 
 lies, and ecclesiastics of the ancient faith, 
 who expatriated themselves for conscience' 
 sake, or through dread of the bloody enact- 
 ments levelled at those who worshipped 
 God as their fathers had done before them. 
 The Irish and Scotch soldiers who took ser- 
 vice under continental sovereigns sprinkled 
 the army lists of France, of Spain, and of 
 Austria with O's and Macs. There was 
 scarcely a European city without an Anglo- 
 Saxon or Anglo-Celtic monastery or nun- 
 nery, and scarcel}'- a seaport without a colony 
 of British exiles cast upon foreign shores
 
 PREFACE. XI 
 
 after the tempests of the Boyne, of Sheriff- 
 niiiir, of Preston, or of CuUoden. When these 
 refugees went abroad it was to remain for 
 ten, for twenty, for thirty years, or for life. 
 The travelling of the present century is spas- 
 modic, that of the last century was chronic. 
 I do not know whether the '* Adventures" 
 I have ascribed to Captain Dangerous will 
 be readily recognised as '' strange." To 
 some they may appear exaggerated and 
 distorted, to others merely strained and dull. 
 If truth, however, be stranger than fiction, 
 I may plead something in abatement ; for 
 although I am responsible for the thread of 
 the story and the conduct of the narrative, 
 there is not one Fact set down as having 
 marked the career of the Captain that has 
 been drawn from imagination. For the 
 story of Arabella Greenville, for the sketch 
 of the Unknown Lady, for the exploits of the 
 " Blacks" in Charlwood Chase, for the his- 
 tory of Mother Drum, for the voyage round 
 the world, for the details of the executions
 
 Xll PREFACE. 
 
 of Lord Lovat and Damiens, for the descrip- 
 tion of the state of a Christian captive among- 
 the Moors, I am indebted, not to a lively 
 fancy, but to books of travel, memoirs. Acts 
 of Parliament, and old newspapers and 
 magazines. I can scarcely, however, hope 
 that, although the incidents and the language 
 in this book are the result of years of weary 
 plodding and note-taking, through hundreds 
 of dusty tomes, they will succeed in inte- 
 resting or amusing the public now that 
 they have undergone the process of conden- 
 sation. The house need not be elegant be- 
 cause the foundations have been laboriously 
 laid. A solid skeleton does not always 
 imply a beautiful skin. 
 
 It is possible, nevertheless, that many 
 persons may cry out that what I have 
 written of Captain Dangerous could not 
 liave occurred, with any reasonable amount 
 of probability, to any one man. Let me 
 mention the names of a score of men and 
 women recently or still living, and let me
 
 PREFACE. Xlll 
 
 ask tlie reader whether anything in my 
 hero's career was stranger than the adven- 
 tures which marked theirs ? Here is a pen- 
 ful taken at random, — Lord Dundonald^ 
 Lola Montes, Eaousset-Bonlbon, Eichard 
 Burton, Garibaldi, Felice Orsini, Ida 
 Pfeiffer, Edgar Poe, Mr. and Mrs. Atkinson 
 (the Siberian travellers), Marshal St. 
 Arnaud, Paul du Chaillu, Joseph Wolff, Dr. 
 Livingstone, Gordon Gumming, "William 
 Howard Russell, Robert Houdin, Constan- 
 tine Simonides, Barnum, and Louis Napo- 
 leon Bonaparte. The life of any one of 
 these personages, truthfully written, would 
 be a thousand times stranger than anything 
 that is set down to Dangerous's account. 
 Let me quote one little example more in 
 point. Two years ago I wrote a story 
 called the " Seven Sons of Mammon," in 
 which there was an ideal character — that of 
 a fair-haired little swindler, and presumable 
 murderess, called Mrs. Armytage. The Press 
 concurred in protesting that the character in
 
 XIV PREFACE. 
 
 question was untrue to nature, and, indeed, 
 wholly impossible. Some details I had 
 given of her violent conduct in j^rison were 
 specially objected to as grossly improbable. 
 I said at the time that I had drawn the 
 woman from nature, and I was sneered at, 
 and not believed. I now again declare, 
 upon my honour, that this Mrs. Armytage, 
 was a compound of two real people ; that as 
 regards her murdering propensities, I was, 
 for the matter and the manner thereof, be- 
 holden to the French Gazette ties Trihunaux 
 for the year 1839 ; and that as respects her 
 achievements in the way of lying, thieving, 
 swindling, forging, and fascinating, I had 
 before me, as a model, a woman whose mis- 
 deeds were partially exposed some ten years 
 since in Household Words, Avho, her term of 
 punishment over, is, to the best of my 
 belief, alive at this moment, and icho was 
 re-married less than a year ago : — the an- 
 nouncement of that fact being duly inserted 
 in the Times newspaper. The prison details
 
 PREFACE. XV 
 
 had been gathered by me years before, in 
 visits to gaols and in conversations with 
 the governors thereof; and months after the 
 pubhcation of the ''Seven Sons of Mammon/' 
 I found them corroborated in their minutest 
 characteristics in a remarkable work called 
 *' Female Life in Prison." 
 
 It remains for me to say one word as to 
 the language in which the " Adventures ot 
 Captain Dangerous" are narrated. I had 
 originally intended to call it a " Narrative in 
 plain English ; " but I found, as I proceeded, 
 that the study of early eighteenth century 
 literature — I mean the ante-Johnsonian pe- 
 riod — had led me into the use of very many 
 now obsolete words and phrases, which 
 sounded like anything but plain English. 
 Let me, however, humbly represent that 
 the style, such as it is, was not adopted 
 without a purpose, and that the English I 
 have called " old-fashioned," was not in the 
 remotest degree intended to be modelled 
 upon the diction of Swift, or Pope, or Ad-
 
 XVI PREFACE. 
 
 tlison, or Steele, or Dryden, or Defoe, or 
 even Nash or Howel. Such a feat of 
 elegant pedantry has already been accom- 
 plished by Mr. Thackeray in his noble story 
 of Esmond ; and I had no wish to follow 
 up a dignified imitation by a sorry carica- 
 ture. I simply endeavoured to make Cap- 
 tain Dangerous express himself as a man 
 of ordinary intelligence and capacity would 
 do who was born in the reign of Queen 
 Anne, — who received a scrambling education 
 in that of George the First, — who had passed 
 the prime of his life abroad and had picked 
 up a good many bastard foreign words and 
 locutions, — whose reading had been confined 
 to the ordinary newspapers and chap-books 
 of his time (with perhaps an occasional dip 
 into the pages of " Ned Ward" and " Tom 
 Brown"), — and who in his old age had pre- 
 served the pseudo-didactic of his youth. The 
 " Adventures of Captain Dangerous" have 
 been, in every sense, an experiment, and not 
 a very gratifying one. I have earned by them
 
 PREFACE. XVll 
 
 a great many kicks, but a very few half- 
 pence. Should the toe of any friendly critic 
 be quivering in his boot just now, at the 
 bare announcement of '' Captain Dangerous' " 
 re-appearance, I would respectfull}^ submit 
 that there could not possibly occur a better 
 opportunity than the present for kicking me 
 de novo, as I have been for months very ill, 
 and am weary, and broken. 
 
 GrEORGE AUGUSTUS SaLA. 
 
 Bernard Street, Russell Square, 
 A^ril, 1863.
 
 CONTENTS OF VOL. I. 
 
 CHAPTER THE FIRST. 
 
 PAGE 
 MINE OWN HOUSE 1 
 
 CHAPTER THE SECOND. 
 
 THE HISTORY OF AN UNKNOWN LADY, WHO CAME 
 
 FEOM DOVER IN A COACH-AND-SIX 22 
 
 CHAPTER THE THIRD. 
 
 THE HISTORY OF MY GRANDMOTHER, WHO WAS A 
 
 LADY OF CONSEQUENCE IN THE WEST COUNTRY . 40 
 
 CHAPTER THE FOURTH. 
 
 MY GRANDMOTHER DIES, AND I AM LEFT ALONE, 
 
 WITHOUT SO MUCH AS A NAME 85 
 
 CHAPTER THE FIFTH. 
 
 I AM BARBAROUSLY ABUSED BY THOSE WHO HAVE 
 CHARGE OF ME, AND FLYING INTO CHARLWOOD 
 CHASE, JOIN THE " BLACKS " . 124 
 
 CHAPTER THE SIXTH. 
 
 THE HISTORY OF MY GRANDFATHER, WHO WAS SO 
 LONG KEPT A PRISONER IN ONE OF THE KING's 
 CASTLES IX THE EAST COUNTRY 148
 
 XX CONTENTS. 
 
 CHAPTER THE SEVENTH. 
 
 rAOB 
 I AM BRED UP IN TEEY BAD COMPANY, AND (tO 
 
 MY shame) help to KILL THE KING's DEEE . 181 
 
 CHAPTER THE EIGHTH. 
 
 THE HISTOEY OF MOTHEE DEUM 220 
 
 CHAPTER THE NINTH. 
 
 THE END OF MY ADVENTUEES AMONG THE BLACKS 247 
 
 CHAPTER THE TENTH. 
 
 I AM VERY NEAR BEING HANGED 283
 
 THE STEANGE ADVENTUEES 
 
 OP 
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 
 
 CHAPTER THE. FIEST. 
 
 MINE OWN HOUSE. 
 
 I, John Dangerous, a faitliful subject of 
 his Majesty King George, wliose bread, 
 Ood bless liim ! I have eaten, and whose 
 battles I have fought, in my poor way, am 
 now in ray sixty-eighth year, and live in My 
 Own House in Hanover Square. By virtue 
 of several commissions, both English and 
 foreign, I have a right to call myself Cap- 
 tain ; and if any man say that I have no 
 such right, he Lies, and deserves the Stab. 
 
 VOL. I. B
 
 2 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 It may be that this narrative, now composed 
 only for my own Pleasure, will, long after 
 my Death, see the light in Print, and that 
 some copper Captain, or counterfeit critic, or 
 pitiful creature of that kidney, will question 
 my Eank, or otherwise despitefully use my 
 Memory. Let such treachours and clapper- 
 dudgeons (albeit I value not their leasing 
 a bagadine) venture it at their peril. I 
 have, alas, no heirs male; but to my 
 Daughter's husband, and to his descen- 
 dants, or, failing them, to their executors, 
 administrators, and assigns, I solemnly com- 
 mit the task of seeking out such envious 
 Eogues, and of kicking and firking them 
 on the basest part of their base bodies. The 
 stab I forego ; I wish not to cheat the hang- 
 man of his due, or the Eev. ]\Ir. Yillette of 
 a sermon. , But let the knaves discover, 
 to the aching of their scald sides, that even 
 the Ghost of John Dangerous is not to be 
 libelled. 
 
 There is a knot of these same cittern- 
 headed simpletons who meet at a coiSee-house
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 3 
 
 in Great Swallow Street, which T am some- 
 times minded to frequent, and who imagine 
 that they show their wit and parts by reviling 
 their Church and their King, and even by 
 maligning the Honourable East India Com- 
 pany, — a corporation to which I am beholden 
 for many Favours. " Fellow," I said, only 
 last Saturday, to a whippersnapper from an 
 Inn of Court, — a Thing I would not trust 
 to defend my Tom-Cat were he in peril at 
 the Old Bailey for birdslaughter, and who 
 picks up a wretched livelihood, I am told, 
 by scribbling lampoons against his betters in 
 a weekly Eeview, — "Fellow," I said, " were I 
 twenty years younger, and you twenty j^ears 
 older, John Dangerous would vouchsafe to 
 pink an eyelet-hole in your waistcoat. Did 
 I care to dabble in your polite conversation 
 or your belles lettres (of which I knew much 
 more than ever you will know years before 
 the Parish was at pains to fix your begetting 
 on some one), I would answer your scurrilities 
 in Print ; but this I disdain, sirrah. Good 
 stout Ash and good strong Cordovan leather 
 b2
 
 4 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OP 
 
 are the things fittest to meet your imper- 
 tinences with ;" and so I hehl out my Foot, 
 and shook my Staff at the titivilitium cox- 
 comb ; and he was so civil to me during the 
 rest of the evening as to allow me to pay his 
 clog-shot for him. 
 
 The chief delight I derive from ending 
 my days in Hanover Square is the knowledge 
 that the house is Mine Own. I bought it 
 with the fruit of mine own earnings, mine 
 own moneys — not gotten from grinding tlie 
 faces and squeezing the vitals of the Poor, 
 but acquired by painful and skilful Industry, 
 and increased by the lawful spoil of AVar. 
 For booty, as I have heard a great com- 
 mander say in Eussia, is a Holy Thing. I 
 have not disdained to gather moderate riches 
 by the buying and selling of lawful Mer- 
 chandize ; albeit I always looked on mere 
 Commerce and Barter as having something 
 of the peddling and huxtering savour in 
 them. My notion of a Merchant is that of 
 a Bold Spirit who embarks on his own ven- 
 ture in his own ship, and is his own super-
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. O 
 
 cargo, and has good store of guns and Bold 
 Spirits like himself on board, and sails to 
 and fro on the High Seas whithersoever he 
 pleases. As to the colour of the flag he is 
 under, what matters it if it be of no colour at 
 all, as old Eobin Eoughhead used to say to 
 me, — even Black, whicli is the Negation of 
 all colour ? So I have traded in my way, 
 and am the better by some thousands of 
 pounds for my trading, now. That much 
 of my wealtli has its origin in lawful Plunder 
 I scorn to deny. If you slay a Spanish Don 
 in fair fight, and the Don wears jewelled rings 
 and carcanets on all his fingers, and carries a 
 great bag of moidores in his pocket, are you to 
 leave him on tlie field, prithee, or gently ease 
 him of his valuables ? Can the crows eat his 
 finery as well as his carcase ? If I find a 
 ship full of golden doubloons and silver 
 candlesticks destined for the chapel of St. 
 Jago de Compostella, am I to scuttle the 
 ship and let her go dow^n with all these good 
 things on board ; or am I to convey them 
 to mine own lockers, giving to each of my
 
 O THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Valiant Comrades liis just and proper share ? 
 The governor of Carthagena will never get 
 the doubloons, St. Jago of Compostella will 
 never see his candlesticks ; why should not 
 litnd my Brave Hearts enjoy them instead 
 of the fishes and the mermaids ? They have 
 Coral enough down there, I trow, by the 
 deep, nini; what do they want with Can- 
 dlesticks? If they lack further ornament, 
 there are pearls enow to be had out of the 
 oysters — unless there be lawyers down 
 below — ay, and pearls, too, in dead men s 
 skulls, and emerald and diamond gimmels 
 on skeleton hands, among the sea-weed, 
 sand, and the many-coloured pebbles of the 
 great Ocean. 
 
 There are those who call me an old 
 Pirate. Let them. I was never in trouble 
 with the Admiralty Court. I can pass 
 Execution Dock without turning pale. 
 And no one can gainsay me when I aver 
 that I have faithfully served his Majesty 
 King George, and was always a true friend 
 to the Protestant succession.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 7 
 
 There lias been a mighty talk, too, about 
 my turning Turk. Why should not I, if 
 I could not Help it ? Better to read the 
 Koran, than to sing the Black Sanctus. 
 Better to serve Mahound than Bungy's dog. 
 I never Turned my Tippet, as some fine 
 gentlemen who have never seen Constan- 
 tinople have done. I never changed my 
 Principles, although I was a Bashaw with 
 three tails. Better to have three tails than 
 to be a Eat with only one. And, let me 
 tell you, it is a mighty fine thing to be a 
 Bashaw, and to have as many purses full of 
 Sequins and Aspers as there are days in the 
 year. 
 
 I should have been hanged long ago, 
 should I — hanged for a Pirate, a Spy, and 
 a Eenegade? -Well, I have escaped the 
 bow-string in a country where hundreds 
 die of Sore Throat every day, and I can 
 afford to laugh at any prospect of a wycli 
 round my weasand in mine old age. Sword 
 of Damocles forsooth ! why my life has 
 been hanging on a cobweb any time these
 
 8 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 fifty years ; and here I am at Sixty-Eight 
 safe and sound, with a whole Liver and a 
 stout Heart, and a bottle of wine to give 
 a Friend, and a house of mine own in 
 Hanover Square. 
 
 I write this in the great Front Parlour, 
 which I have converted into a library, 
 study, and counting-room. The year of 
 our Lord is seventeen hundred and eighty. 
 His Majesty's subjects have lost eleven 
 days — through some Eoguery in high places, 
 you may be sure — since I was a young man ; 
 and were I a cocksloch, I might grudge 
 that snipping off of the best part of a fort- 
 night from an Old Man's life. It may be, 
 indeed, that Providence, which has always 
 been good to me, will add eleven days — 3'ea, 
 and twice eleven — to the dwindling span of 
 poor old John Dangerous. I have many 
 Mercies to be thankful for ; of sins likewise 
 without blin, and grievous ones, there may 
 be a long list that I shall have to account for ; 
 but I can say that I never killed a man in 
 cold blood, that I never wilfully wronged a
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 9 
 
 woman, so long as she was not obstinate, tliat 
 I never spake an unkind word to a child, 
 that I always gave freely from that which I 
 got freel}^ and never took from him who 
 had little, and that I was always civil to the 
 clergy. Yet Doctor Dubiety of St. George'^ 
 tells me that I have been a signal sinner, 
 and bids me, now, to repent of my evil 
 w^ays. Dr. Dubiety is in the right no 
 doubt ; — how could a Doctor of Divinity 
 be ever in the Wrong ? — but I can't see 
 that I am so much worse than other folks. 
 I should be in better case, perhaps, if these 
 eyes stood wider open. I confess that I 
 have killed many men with Powder and 
 Lead, and the sharp sword ; but, then, had I 
 not shot or stabbed them, they would surely 
 have shot or stabbed me. And are not his 
 Majesty's fellow-subjects shooting and stab- 
 bing one another at this instant moment* 
 in the American plantations ? No ; I 
 always fought fair, and never refused Quarter 
 
 * 1780.
 
 10 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 when mine enemy threw up his point ; nor, 
 unless a foeman's death were required for 
 Lawful Eeprisals, did I ever deny moderate 
 Eansom. 
 
 There may be some things belonging to 
 my worldly store that trouble me a little 
 in the night season. Should I have given 
 St. Jago de Compostella's candlesticks to 
 Westminster Abbey? Why, surely, the 
 Dean and Chapter are rich enough. But 
 I declare that I had neither art not part 
 in fitting the thumbscrews to the Spanish 
 captain, and putting the boatswain and his 
 mate to the ordeal of flogging and pick- 
 ling. 'Twas not I, but Matcham, who is 
 Dead, that caused the carpenter to be car- 
 bonadoed, and the Scotch purser to walk 
 the Plank. Those were, I grant, deeds 
 worthy of Blackbeard; but I had naught 
 to do with them. John Dangerous ha 
 suffered too many tortures in the dungeons 
 of the Inquisition to think of afflicting his 
 fellow-creatures when there was no nee 
 for it. Then, as to what became of Dona
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 11 
 
 Estella. I declare tliat I did my best to 
 save that unliappy lady. I entreated, I 
 protested ; but in vain. None of that guilt 
 lies at my door ; and in the crime of him 
 who roasted the Bishop, and cut off the 
 Franciscan Monk's great toes I have no 
 share. Let every man answer for his own 
 deeds. When I went the Middle Passage, 
 I tried to keep the slaves alive as long I 
 could. I was never a Mangoniser. When 
 they died, what was there to do but to fling 
 them overboard? Should I not have done 
 the same by white men ? I was not one 
 of those cruel Guinea captains who kept 
 the living and the dead chained together. 
 I defy any one to prove it. 
 
 And all this bald chat about sacking 
 towns and gutting convents ? War is war 
 all the world over ; and if you take a town 
 by Assault, why of course you must Sack it. 
 As to gutting convents, 'tis a mercy to le 
 some pure air into the close, stifling places ; 
 and, of a surety, an act of Charity to let the 
 poor captive nuns out for a Holiday.
 
 12 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OP 
 
 Eeverend Superiors, holy sisters, I never 
 did ye an}^ harm. You cannot torment me 
 in the night. Your pale faces and shadowy 
 forms have no need to gather round the 
 bed of John Dangerous. Take, for Pity's 
 sake, those Eyes away ! But no more ! 
 These thoughts drive me Mad. 
 
 I am not Alone in my house. My daugh- 
 ter, my beloved Lilias, my only and most 
 cherished child, the child of my old age, 
 the legacy of the departed Saint her mother, 
 lives with me. Bless her ! she believes not 
 a word of the Lies that are whispered of her 
 old Father. If she w^re to be told a tithe 
 of them, she would grieve sorely ; but she 
 holds no converse wdth Slanderers and those 
 who wag their tongues and say so-and-so 
 of such-a-one. She knows that my life 
 nas been wild, and stormy, and Dangerous 
 as my name ; but she knows that it has 
 also been one of valour, and honesty, and 
 striving. St. Jago de Compostella's candle- 
 sticks never w^nt towards her schooling, 
 pretty creature ! My share from the gold
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 13 
 
 in the scuttled ship never helped to furnish 
 forth her dowry. Lilias is my joy, my 
 comfort, my stay, my merciful consolation 
 for tlie loss of that good and perfect "Woman 
 her mother. Dear heart ! she has never 
 been crossed in love, never known Love's 
 sorrows, angers, disappointments, and des- 
 pair. She was married to the Man of her 
 Choice ; and I am delighted to know that I 
 never interfered, by word or by deed, witli 
 the progress of her Wooing; that he to 
 whom she is wedded is one of the worthiest 
 of youths ; and that Heaven has blessed me 
 with the means to enable him to maintain 
 the state and figure of a gentleman. 
 
 Thus, although Comfort and Quiet are 
 the things I chiefly desire after the bustle 
 and turmoil of a tempest-tossed career, and 
 the pleasure I take in the gaieties of the 
 Town is but small, it cheers me to see my 
 Son and Daughter enjoying themselves, as 
 those who have youth and health and an 
 unclouded conscience are warranted in doins^, 
 and, indeed, called upon to do. I like them
 
 14 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 on Sundays and Holidays to come to church 
 at St. George's, and sit under Doctor 
 Dubiety, where I, as a little lad, sat many 
 and many a time, more than fifty years ago; 
 but my house is no Conventicle, and on all 
 weekdays and Lawful Occasions my family 
 is privileged to partake to their heart's con- 
 tent of innocent and permitted pastimes. 
 I never set my face against a visit to the 
 Playhouse or to the Concert-room ; al- 
 though to me, who can remember the most 
 famous players and singers of Europe, the 
 King's Theatre and the Pantheon, and even 
 Drury-Lane, are very tame places, filled with 
 very foolish folk. But they please the young 
 people, and that is enough for me. Nor to 
 an occasional junketing at Vauxhall do I ever 
 turn queasy. 'Tis true I have seen Eanelagh 
 and Marylebone Belsize, and Spring Gar- 
 dens, and seen Folly on the Thames — to say 
 nothing of the chief Continental Tivolis, 
 Spas, Lustgartens, and other places of resort 
 of the Great ; but fiddlers are fiddlers, and 
 coloured lamps are coloured lamps, all the
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 15 
 
 world over, I apprehend ; and mj children 
 have as much delight in gazing on these 
 spangled follies now as I had when I and 
 the eighteenth century were young. Only 
 against Masquerades and Faro-tables, as 
 likewise against the pernicious game of 
 E. 0., post and pair, fayles, dust-point, do I 
 sternly set my face, deeming them as wholly 
 wicked, carnal, and unprofitable, and leading 
 directly to perdition. 
 
 It rejoices me much that my son, or rather 
 son-in-law, — but I love to call him by the 
 more affectionate name, — is in no wise ad- 
 dicted to dicing, or horse-racing, or cock- 
 fighting, or any of those sinful or riotous 
 courses to which so many of our genteel 
 youth — even to those of the first Quality — de- 
 vote themselves. He is no Puritan ; (for I 
 did ever hate your sanctimonious Banbury- 
 men) ; but he has a Proper Sense of what 
 is due to the Honour and Figure of his 
 family, and refrains from soiling his hands 
 with bales of dice and worse implements 
 among the profligate crew to be met with.
 
 10 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OP 
 
 not alone at Newmarket, or at the ''Dog and 
 Duck," or "Hockley Hole," butinPall-Mall, 
 and in the very ante-chambers of St. James's, 
 no cater-cousin of the Groom-Porter he. He 
 rides his hackney, as a gentleman should, 
 nor have I prohibited him from occasion- 
 ally taking my Lilias an airing in a neat 
 curricle ; but he is no Better on the Turf, 
 no comrade of jockeys and stablemen, no 
 patron of bruisers and those that handle the 
 backsword and are quick at finish with the 
 provant rapier, and agile in the use of the 
 imbrocatto. I would disinherit him were I 
 to suspect him of such practices, or of an 
 over-fondness for the bottle, or of a passion 
 for loose company. He hunts sometimes, and 
 fiishes and goes a birding, and he has a 
 pretty fancy for the making of salmon-flies, 
 in the which pursuit, I conclude, there is 
 much ingenuity, and no manner of harm, 
 fish being given to us for food, and the de- 
 vising: how best to snare the creatures en- 
 tirely Lawful. 
 
 Lilias Dangrerous has been wedded to
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 17 
 
 Edward Marriner these two years. It was 
 at first my design to buy the youth a Pair of 
 Colours, and to let him see the world and 
 the usages of honourable warfare for a year 
 or two ; but my Lilias could not bear the 
 thought of her young Ensign's coming home 
 without an arm or a leg, or perchance being 
 slain in some desperate conflict with savage 
 Indians, or scarcely less savage Americans ; 
 and I did not press my plan of giving Ed- 
 ward for a time to the service of the King. 
 He, I am bound to say, was eager to take 
 up a Commission; but the tears and en- 
 treaties of my Daughter, who thinks War 
 the wickedest of crimes, and the shedding of 
 human blood a wholly Unpardonable Thing, 
 prevailed. So they were Married, and are 
 Happy ; and I am sure, now, that were I to 
 lose either of them, it would break the old 
 man's heart. 
 
 My Lilias is tall and slender, her skin is 
 very white, her hair a rich brown, her eyes 
 very large and clear and blue. But that I am 
 too old to be vain, I might be twitted with 
 
 VOL. I. c
 
 18 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Conceit when I state that she holds these 
 advantages of person less from her Mother 
 than from myself, her loving Father. Not that 
 I was so comely in my young days ; but my 
 Grandmother before me was of the same fair 
 Image that I so delight to look upon in 
 Lilias. She was tall, and white, and brown- 
 haired, and blue- eyed. She had Lilias's 
 small and daintily-fashioned hands and 
 feet, or rather Lilias has hers. To me these 
 features were only transmitted in a meaner 
 degree. I was a big-boned lusty lad, with 
 flowing brown locks, an unfreckled skin, and 
 an open eye ; but my Grandmother's Face 
 and Form have renewed themselves in my 
 child. At twenty she is as beautiful as 
 her Great-grandmother must have been at 
 that same sunny time, as I am told and know 
 that Lady was : albeit when I remember her 
 she was nearly Ninety years of age. 
 
 Yes ; Lilias's eyes are very blue ; but they 
 are always soft and tender and pitiful in 
 their regard. Her Great-grandmother's had,
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 19 
 
 when she was moved, a Strange Wild look 
 that awed and terrified the beholders. Only 
 once in the life of my Lilias, when she was 
 very young, and on the question of some toy 
 or sweetmeat which my departed Saint had 
 denied her, did I notice that Terrible Look in 
 her blue eyes. My wife, who, albeit the most 
 merciful soul alive, ever maintained strict 
 discipline in her household, would have cor- 
 rected the child for what she set down as flat 
 mutiny and rebellion ; but I stayed her 
 chastening hand, and bade the young girl 
 walk awhile in the garden until her heat 
 was abated ; and as she went away, her little 
 breast heaving, her little hands clenched, 
 and the Terrible Look darting out on me 
 through the silken tangles of her dear hair, 
 I shuddered, and said, " Wife of mine, our 
 Lilias's look is one she cannot help. It 
 comes from Me, you may have seen it, 
 fiercer and fiercer in mine own eyes ; and 
 She, whom of all women I loved and vene- 
 rated, looked thus when anger overcame 
 c2
 
 20 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 lier. And thougli I never knew my own 
 dear Mother, she, or I greatly mistake, must 
 have had that look in hers likewise." 
 
 I thank Heaven that those pure blue 
 waters, limpid and bright, in my Lilias's 
 orbs were nevermore ruffled by that 
 storm. As she grew up, their expression 
 became even softer and kinder, and she 
 never ceased from being in the likeness of 
 an Angel. She looks like one now, and will 
 be one, I trust, some day. Above, where she 
 can pray for her danger- worn old sire. 
 
 My own wife (whose name was Lilias too) 
 was a merry, plump, ruddy-skinned little 
 woman — a very baby in these strong arms 
 of mine. She had lauc^hino* black eves, and 
 coal-black tresses, and lips which were always 
 at vintao:e-time. Althouo"h her onlv child 
 takes after me, not her, in face and carriage, 
 in all things else she resembles my Saint. 
 She is as merry, as light-hearted, as pure and 
 good, as she was. She has the same humble, 
 pious Faith ; the same strong, inflexible will 
 of abiding by Eight ; the same hearty, out-
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 21 
 
 spoken hatred of Wrong, abliorrence of Wrong. 
 Slie has tlie same patience, cheerfulness, and 
 obedience in her behaviour to those who are 
 set in authority over her ; and if I am b}^ 
 times angered, or peevish, or moody, she 
 bears with my infirmities in the same meek, 
 loving, and forgiving spirit. She has her 
 Mother's grace, her Mother's voice, her 
 Mother's ringing voice. She has her Mother's 
 infinite care of and benevolence to the poor 
 and needy. She has her Mother's love for 
 merry sports and innocent romps. Like my 
 departed Saint, she has an exquisitely neat 
 and quick liand for making pastries and 
 marchpanes, possets and sugared tankards, 
 and confeeding of diapasms, pomanders, and 
 other sweet essences, and cures for the chil- 
 blains ; and like her she plays excellent well 
 on the harpsichords. 
 
 Thus, in a quiet comfort and competence, 
 in the love of my children, and in the King's 
 peace, these my latter days are gliding away. 
 I am somewhat troubled with gout and 
 twitching pains, scotomies in the head, and
 
 22 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 fulness of humours, with other old men's ail- 
 ments ; and I do not sleep well o' nights 
 owing to vexatious Dreams and Visions, to 
 abate which I am sometimes let blood, and 
 sometimes blistered behind the ears ; but 
 beyond these cares — and who hath not his 
 cares ? — Captain John Dangerous, of number 
 One hundred Hanover Square, is a Happy 
 Man.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 23 
 
 CHAPTEE THE SECOND. 
 
 THE HISTOEY OF AN UNKNOWN LADY, WHO CAME FROM 
 DOVER IN A COACH-AND-SIX. 
 
 In the winter of tlie year 1720, died in her 
 house in Hanover Square, — the very one in 
 which I am now finishing my life, — an Un- 
 known Lady nearly ninety years of age. 
 The mansion was presumed to be her own, 
 and it was as much hers as it is mine now ; 
 but the reputed landlord was one Doctor 
 Vigors, a physician of the College in War- 
 wick Lane, in whose name the Lease ran, 
 who was duly rated to the poor as tenant, 
 and whose patient the Unknown Lady was 
 given out to be. But when Dr. Vigors 
 came to Hanover Square it was not as a 
 Master, but as the humblest of Servants; and 
 no tradesman, constable, maid, or lacquey
 
 24 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 about tlie house or neighbourhood would 
 have ventured for his or her life to question 
 that, from cellar to roof, every inch of the 
 mansion belonged to the Unknown Lady. 
 The vulgar held her in a kind of Awe, and 
 spoke of her as the Lady in Diamonds ; for 
 she always wore a number of those precious 
 gems, in rings, bracelets, stomachers, and 
 the like. The gentlefolks, of whom many 
 waited upon her, from her first coming hither 
 unto her death, asked for " my Lady," and 
 nothing more. It was in the year 1714 that 
 she first arrived in London, coming late at 
 night from Dover, in a coach-and-six, and 
 bringing with her one Mr. Cadwallader, a 
 person of a spare habit and great gravity of 
 countenance, as her steward ; one Mistress 
 Nancy Talmash, as her waiting- woman ; and 
 a Foreign Person of a dark and forbidding 
 mien, who was said to be her chaplain. In 
 the following 3^ear, and during the unhappy 
 troubles in Scotland arising out of the 
 treasons of the Earl of Mar, and other Scots 
 Lords, one of his Majesty's messengers came
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 25 
 
 for the Foreign Person, and conveyed liim in 
 a coach to the Cockpit at Whitehall ; while 
 another messenger took up his abode in the 
 house at Hanover Square, lying in the 
 second best bed-chamber, and having his 
 table apart, for a whole week. From these 
 circumstances, it was rumoured that the 
 Unknown Lady was a Papist and Jacobite ; 
 that the seminary Priest, her confederate, 
 was bound for Newgate, and would doubt- 
 less make an end of it at Tyburn ; and that 
 the Lady herself would be before many days 
 clapt up in the Tower. But Signor Casagiotti, 
 the Venetian Envoy, as a subject of the 
 seignory, claimed the Foreign Person and 
 obtained his release ; and it was said that 
 one of the great Lords of the Council 
 came himself to Hanover Square to take the 
 examination of the Unknown Lady, and was 
 so well satisfied with the speech he had with 
 her as to discharge her then and there from 
 Custody, — if, indeed, she had ever been under 
 any actual durance, — and promise her the 
 King and Minister's countenance for the
 
 2G THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 future. The Foreign Person was suffered to 
 return, and thenceforward was addressed as 
 Father Euddlestone, as though he had some 
 licence bearing him harmless from the penal- 
 ties and praemunires which then weighed upon 
 recusant persons. And I am given to under- 
 stand that, on the evening of his enlargement, 
 the same great Lord, being addressed in a 
 jocular manner at tlie coffee-house by a 
 Person of Honour, and asked if he had not 
 caught the Pope, the Devil, and the Pretender 
 in petticoats and diamonds, somewhere in St. 
 George's parish, very gravely made answer, 
 that some degrees of Loyalty were like Gold, 
 which, were all the better for being tried in 
 the furnace, and that, although there had 
 once been a King James, and there was now 
 a King George, the lady, of whom perhaps 
 that gentleman was minded to speak, had 
 done a notable Thing before he was born, 
 which entitled her to the eternal gratitude 
 of Kings. 
 
 Although so old on her lirst coming to 
 Hanover Square, and dwelling in it until
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 27 
 
 her waiting- woman avowed that she was 
 close on her Ninetieth year, the Unknown 
 Lady preserved her faculties in a surprising 
 manner, and till within a few days of her 
 passing away went about her house, took 
 the air from time to time in her coach, or in 
 a chair, and received company. The very 
 highest persons of Quality sought her, and 
 appeared to take pleasure in her conversation. 
 To Court, indeed, she never went ; but she 
 was visited more than once by an illus- 
 trious Prince ; and many great nobles like- 
 wise waited upon her in their Birthday 
 suits. On Birthnights there was Play in 
 the great drawing-room, where nothing but 
 gold was permitted to be staked. 
 
 Credible persons have described her to 
 me as being, and supplemented mine own 
 memory — in the extremest sunset of her 
 life, when the very fray and pillings of her 
 garment were come to, and no more stuff 
 remained wherewith to piece it, — a person 
 of Signal Beauty. She was of commanding 
 stature, stooped very little, albeit she made
 
 2S THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 use of a crutcli-stick in walking:, and had a 
 carriage full of graciousness, yet of some- 
 what austere Dignity. No portion of her 
 hair was visible under the thick folds of 
 muslin and point of Alen9on which covered 
 her head, and were themselves half hidden 
 by a hood of black Paduasoy ; but in a 
 glass-case in her cabinet, among other relics 
 of which I may have presently to speak, she 
 kept a quantity of themost beauteous chest- 
 nut tresses ever beheld. " These were my 
 Love-Locks, child," I remember her saying 
 to me once. I am ashamed to confess that, 
 during my brief commerce with her, the 
 dress she wore, which was commonly of 
 black velvet, and the diamonds which glit- 
 tered on her hands and arms and bosom 
 impressed themselves far more forcibly on 
 my memory than her face, which I have 
 since been told was Beautiful. ]\Iy in- 
 formant bears v/itness that her eyes were 
 Blue, and of an exceeding brightness, some- 
 times quite terrible to look upon, although 
 tempered at most times by a Sweet Mildness;
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 29 
 
 yet there were seasons when this bright- 
 ness, as that of the Sun in a wholly cloudless 
 sky, became Fierce, and burnt up him who 
 beheld it. Time had been so long a hus- 
 bandman of her fair demesne, had reaped 
 so many crops of smiles and tears from that 
 comely visage, that it were a baseness to 
 infer that no traces of his husbandry ap- 
 peared on her once smooth and silken flesh, 
 for the adornment of which she had ever 
 disdained the use of essences and unguents. 
 Yet I am told that her wrinkles and creases, 
 althoughmanifold, were not harsh nor rugged; 
 and that her face might be likened rather to 
 a billet of love written on fair white vellum, 
 that had been somewhat crumpled by the 
 hand of him wlio hates Youth and Love, 
 than to some musty old conveyance or 
 mortgage-deed scrabbled on yellow, damp- 
 stained, rat-gnawed parchment. Her hands 
 and neck were to the last of an amazing 
 "Whiteness. The former, as were also her 
 feet, very small and delicate. Her speech 
 when moved was Quick, and she spoke as
 
 30 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 one accustomed to be obeyed ; but at most 
 seasons ber bearing towards ber domestics 
 was infinitely kind and tender. Towards 
 the Foreign Person, ber Director, sbe always 
 bore berself with edifying meekness. She 
 was cheerful in company, full of ready wit, 
 of great shrewdness, discretion, and obser- 
 vation ; could discourse to admiration of 
 foreign cities and persons of renown, even 
 to Kings and Princes, whom sbe bad seen 
 and known ; and was well qualified to speak 
 on public afi'airs, although she seldom deigned 
 to concern herself with the furious madness 
 of Party. Mere idle prattle of Operas, and 
 Play -books, and Auctions, and tbe like, was 
 extremely distasteful to her ; and although 
 at that time a shameful looseness of manners 
 and conversation obtained even among the 
 Greatest persons in the land, she would 
 never suffer any evil or immodest talk to be 
 held in her presence ; and those who wished 
 to learn aught of the wickedness of the town 
 and the scandals of High Life were fain to 
 go elsewliere for their gossip.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 31 
 
 I have said that her dress was to me the 
 chief point of notice, and is that of which I 
 retain the keenest rememhrance. Her dia- 
 monds, indeed, had over me that strange 
 fascination which serpents are said to have 
 over birds ; and I would sit with my httle 
 mouth all agape, and my eyes fixed and 
 staring, nntil they grew dazed, and I was 
 frightened at the solemn twinkling of those 
 many gems. In my absurd child-way, it was 
 to my fancy as though the Lady were some 
 great Altar or Herse of State in a Church, 
 and her Jewels so many Lamps kindled 
 about her, and to be kept alive for ever. 
 She robed habitually, as I have said, in 
 Black Velvet ; but on Birthnights, when 
 more company than usual came, and there 
 was play in the great drawing-room, she 
 would wear a sack' of sad-coloured satin ; 
 while, which was stranger still, on the 
 thirtieth day of January in ever}^ year, at 
 least so long as I can keep it in mind, she 
 wore her sable dress ; not her ordinary one, 
 but a fuller garment, which had bows of
 
 32 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Crimson Ribbon down the front and at the 
 sleeves, and a great Crimson Scarf over the 
 right shoulder, so as to come in saltire over 
 her Heart. And on the day she made this 
 change slie wore no Diamonds, but Eubies 
 in great number, and of great size. On 
 that day, also, we kept an almost entire fast, 
 and from morning to night I had nothing 
 but a little cake and a glass of Eed wine. 
 From sunrise to sunset the Ladv sat in her 
 cabinet among her Relics ; and I was bidden 
 to sit over against her on a little stool. 
 She would talk much, and, as it seemed to 
 me wildl}^ in a language which I could not 
 understand, going towards her relics and 
 touching them in a strange manner. Tlien 
 she would say to me, wdtli a sternness that 
 chilled the marrow in my bones, *' Child, 
 Remember the Day: Remember the Thirlieth 
 of January.'* And she would often repeat 
 that word, " Remember," rocking herself to 
 and fro. And more than once she would 
 say, " Blood for blood." Then Mistress 
 Talmash would enter and assay to. Soothe licr.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 33 
 
 telling her that what was past was past, and 
 could not be undone. Then she would take 
 out a great Prayer-Book bound in Eed 
 leather, and which had this strange device 
 raised in an embosture of gold, on either 
 
 cover, and in a solemn voice read out long 
 passages, which I afterwards learned were 
 from that service holden on the anniversary 
 of the martyrdom of King Charles the Pirst. 
 She would go on to read the Eitual for the 
 King's Touching for the Evil, now ex- 
 punged from our Liturgy ; and then Mistress 
 Talmash would pray her to read tlie joyful 
 prayers for the twenty-ninth of May, the 
 date of the happy restoration of King Charles 
 the Second. But that she would seldom do, 
 
 VOL. I. D
 
 34 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OP 
 
 murmuring, " I dare not, I dare not. Tell 
 not Father Euddlestone." All these things 
 were very strange to me ; but I grew accus- 
 tomed to them in time. And there seems to 
 a solitary child, an immensity of time pass- 
 ing between his first beginning to re- 
 member and his coming to eight years of 
 age. 
 
 There is one thing that I must mention 
 before this Lady ceases to be Unknown to 
 the reader. She was afflicted with a con- 
 tinual trembling of the entire Frame. She 
 was no paralytic, for to the very end she 
 could take her food and medicine without 
 assistance; but she shook always like a 
 very Aspen. It had to do with her nerves, 
 I suppose ; and it was perhaps for that cause 
 she was attended for so many years by Doc- 
 tor Vigors ; but he never did her any good 
 in that wise ; and the whole College of War- 
 wick Lane would, I doubt not, have failed 
 signally had they attempted her cure. Often 
 I asked Mistress Talmash why the Lady — 
 for until her death I knew of no other name
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 35 
 
 whereby to call her — shook so ; but the 
 waiting- woman would chide me, and say that 
 if I asked questions she would shake me. 
 So that I forebore. 
 
 Ours was a strange and solemn house- 
 hold. All was stately and w^ell ordered, 
 and — when company came — splendid; but 
 the house always seemed to me much 
 gloomier than the great Parish-Church, 
 whither I was taken every Sunday morning 
 on the shoulder of a tall footman, and shut up 
 alone in a great Pew lined with scarlet baize, 
 and where I felt very much like a little child 
 that was lost in the midst of the Eed Sea. 
 Far over my head hung a gallery full of the 
 children of Lady Viellcastel's charitj^-school ; 
 and these, both boys and girls, would make 
 grimaces at me while the Psalms were being 
 sung, until I felt more frightened than when 
 I was on my little stool in the cabinet of 
 relics, on the thirtieth of January. Just 
 over the ledge of my pew I could see the 
 clergyman, in his large white wig, leaning 
 over the reading-desk, and talking at me, as 
 d2
 
 36 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 I tliouglit, in a miglity angry manner ; and 
 when he, or another divine, afterwards 
 ascended the pulpit above, I used to fancy 
 that it was only the same parson grown 
 taller, and with a bigger wig, and that he 
 seemed to lean forward, and be angrier with 
 me than ever. The time of kneeling was 
 always one of sore trouble to me, for I had 
 to feel with my foot for the hassock, which 
 seemed to lie as far beneath me as though 
 it were, indeed, sunk at the bottom of the 
 Bed Sea. Getting up again was quite as 
 difficult ; and I don't think we ever atta^ed 
 the end of the Litany without my dropping 
 my great red Prayer-Book — not the thir- 
 tieth-of- January one, but another affected to 
 my especial use — with a Clang. On such occa- 
 sions the pew-door would open, and the 
 Beadle enter. He always picked up the 
 book, and gave it me with a low bow ; but 
 he never omitted to tell me, in a deadly 
 whisper, that if I had been one of Lady Yiell- 
 castel's boys, he'd skin me alive, he would. 
 The Unknown Lady did not attend tlie
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 37 
 
 parish -church. She, and Mistress Talmash, 
 and the Foreign Person, held a service apart. 
 I was called " Little Master," and went 
 with the footman. The fellow's name, I 
 remember, was Jeremy. He used to talk to 
 me, going and coming, as I sat, in my fine 
 Laced Clothes, and my hat with a plume in 
 it, and my little rapier with the silver hilt, 
 perched on his broad shoulder. He used to 
 tell me that he had been a soldier, and 
 had fought under Colonel Kirk ; and 
 that he had a wife, who washed bands 
 and ruffles for the gentlemen of the Life 
 Guard, and drank strong waters till she 
 found herself in the Eoundhouse. Always 
 on a Sunday morning, as tlie church-bells 
 began to ring, the Unknown Lady would 
 give me a Guinea to put into the plate after 
 service. I remember that the year before 
 she died, when I was- big enough to walk 
 with my hand in Jeremy's, instead of being 
 carried, that he told me on Easter- Sunda^^ 
 morning that his wife was dead, and that 
 he had two children in a cellar who had no
 
 38 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 bread to eat. He cried a good deal ; and 
 before we reached the church, took me into 
 a strange room in a back-street, where there 
 were a number of men and women shouting 
 and quarrelling, and another, without his 
 wig and with a great gash in his forehead, 
 sprawling on the ground, and crying out 
 " Lillibulero !" and two more playing cards 
 on a pair of bellows. And they were all 
 drinking from mugs and smoking tobacco. 
 Here Jeremy had something to drink, too, 
 from a mug. He put the vessel to my lips, 
 and I tasted something Hot, which made 
 me feel very faint and giddy. When we 
 were in the open air again, he cried worse 
 than ever. What could I do but give liini 
 my guinea? On our return to Hanover 
 Square, the Lady asked me, according to 
 her custom, what was the text, and whether 
 I had put my money into the pkite. She 
 was not strict about the first ; for I was 
 generally, from my tenderness of years, un- 
 able to tell her more than that tlic gentle- 
 man in the wig seemed very angry with me,
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 39 
 
 and the Pope, and the Prince of Darkness ; 
 but she alway taxed me smartly about the 
 Guinea. This was before the time that I 
 had learned to Lie ; and so I told her how 
 I had given the piece of gold to Jeremy, for 
 that his wife was no more, and his children 
 were in a cellar with nothing to eat. She 
 stayed a while looking at me with those blue 
 eyes, which had first their bright fierceness 
 in them and then their kind and sweet tender- 
 ness. It was the first time that I marked her 
 eyes more than her dress and her diamonds. 
 She took me in her lap, and printed her 
 lips — which were very soft, but cold — upon 
 my forehead. 
 
 " Child," she said, " did I use thee as is 
 the custom, thou shouldst be Whipped, not 
 Kissed, for thy folly and disobedience. But 
 you knew not what you did. Here are two 
 guineas to put into the plate next Sunday ; 
 and let no rogues cozen you out of it. As 
 for Jeremy," she continued, turning to 
 Mistress Talmash, " see that the knave be 
 stripped of his livery, and turned out of
 
 40 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 the house this moment, for robbinc^ my 
 Grandson, and taking him on a Sabbath 
 morning to taverns, among grooms, and 
 porters, and fraplers, and bullies." 
 
 Yes ; the TJnknov/n Lady was my Grand- 
 mother. I purpose now to relate to you 
 her History, revealed to me many years 
 after her deatli, in a manner to be mentioned 
 at the proper time.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 41 
 
 CHAPTEE THE THIED. 
 
 THE HISTORY OF MY GRANDMOTHER, WHO WAS A LADY 
 OF CONSEQUENCE IN THE WEST COUNTRY. 
 
 My Grandmother was born at Bristol, about 
 the year 1630, and in the reign of King 
 Charles the First. She came of a family 
 noted for their long lives, and of whom 
 there was, in good sooth, a proverb in the 
 West setting forth that "Bar Gallows, 
 Glaive, and the Gout, every Greenville 
 would live to a hundred." Her maiden name 
 was Greenville : she was baptised Arabella ; 
 and she was the only daughter of Eichard 
 Greenville, an Esqurre of a fair estate be- 
 tween Bath and Bristol, where his ances- 
 tors had held their- land for three hundred 
 years, on a Jocular Tenure of presenting the 
 king, whenever he came that way, with a
 
 42 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 goose-pie, the legs sticking through the 
 crust. It was Esquire Greenville's misfor- 
 tune to come to his patrimony just as those 
 unhappy troubles were fomenting which 
 a few years after embroiled these kingdoms 
 in one great and dismal Quarrel. It was 
 hard for a gentleman of consequence in his 
 own county, and one whose forefathers 
 had served the most considerable offices 
 therein, — having been of the Quorum ever 
 since the reign of King Edward the Third, 
 — to avoid mingling in some kind or 
 another in the dissensions with which our 
 beloved country was then torn. Mr. Green- 
 ville was indeed a person of a tranquil and 
 placable humour, to whom party j anglings 
 were thoroughly detestable; and although 
 he leant naturally, as beseemed his degree, 
 towards the upholding of his Majesty's 
 Crown and Dignity, and the maintenance 
 in proper Honour and Splendour of the 
 Church, he was too good a Christian and 
 citizen not to shrink from seeing his native 
 land laid waste by the blind savageness of
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 43 
 
 a Civil War. And although he paid Cess 
 and Ship-money without murmuring, and, 
 on being chosen a Knight of the Shire, did 
 zealously speak up in the Commons House 
 of Parliament on the King's side (refusing 
 nevertheless to make one of the lip-serving 
 crowd of courtiers of Whitehall), and 
 although, when churchwarden in his parish, 
 he ever preserved the laudable custom of 
 Whitsun and Martinmas ales for the good 
 of the poor, and persisted in having the 
 Book of Sports read from the pulpit, — he 
 was averse from all high-handed measures 
 of musketooning, and calivering, and gam- 
 briling those of the meaner sort, or those of 
 better degree (as Mr. Hampden, Mr. Pym, 
 and Another whom I shudder to mention), 
 who, for Conscience' sake, opposed them- 
 selves to the King's Government. He was 
 in this wise at issue with some of his 
 hotter Cavalier neighbours, as, for instance. 
 Sir Basil Fauconberg, who, whenever public 
 matters were under question, began with 
 •* Neighbour, you must first show me Pym,
 
 44 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Hampden, Haslerigge, and the rest, swing- 
 ing as the Sign of the Eogne's Head, and 
 then I will begin to chop. Logic with 
 you." For a long time Mr. Greenville, 
 my Great-grandfather (and my enemies 
 may see from this that I am of no Rascal 
 Stock), cherished hopes that affaii*s might 
 be brought to a shape without any shed- 
 ding of Blood ; but his hope proved a 
 vain and deceiving one ; ungovernable pas- 
 sions on either side caused not alone the 
 drawing of the Sword, but the flinging away 
 of the Scabbard ; and my Grandmother was 
 yet but a schoolmaid at Madam Eibotte's 
 academy for gentlew^omen at Bristol when 
 that dreadful sinful war broke out which 
 ended in the barbarous Murther of the 
 Prince, and the Undoing of these king- 
 doms. 
 
 Mr. Greenville had two children : a son, 
 whose name, like his ow^n, Avas Richard, and 
 wdio was born some five years before his 
 sister Arabella. Even as a child this last 
 named person was exceedingly beautiful,
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 45 
 
 very gracious, fair, grave, and dignified of 
 deportment, with abundant brown hair, and 
 large and lustrous blue eyes, which, when 
 the transient tempests of childhood passed 
 over her, were ever remarked as having the 
 wild, fierce look, shared in sometimes by the 
 males of her family. Her mother, to her 
 sorrow, died when she was quite a babe. The 
 Esquire was passionately fond of this his 
 only daughter; but although it was tor- 
 ture for liim to part with her, and he 
 retained her until she was thirteen j^ears of 
 age in his mansion-house, where she was 
 instructed in reading and devotion, pickling 
 and preserving (and the distilling of strong 
 waters), sampler work, and such maidenly 
 parts of education, by the housekeeper, and 
 by a governante brought from London, — 
 he had wisdom enough to discern and to 
 admit that his daughter's genius was of a 
 nature that required and demanded much 
 higher culture than could be given to her 
 in an old Country Seat, and in the midst 
 of talk about dogs, and horses, and cattle.
 
 46 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 and gunning and ploughing, and the con- 
 tinual disputes of hot-headed Cavaliers or 
 bitter Parliamentarians, who were trying 
 who should best persuade my Great-grand- 
 father to cast in his lot with one or the other 
 of the contending parties. His son Ei chard 
 had already made his election, and, it is 
 feared, by taking up supplies on post 
 obit from usurious money-scriveners in 
 Bristol and London, had raised a troop of 
 horse for the service of the King. More- 
 over, Arabella Greenville was of a very 
 proud stomach and unbending humour. 
 She might be Led, but would not be Driven. 
 She adored her father, but laughed at the 
 commands of the governante, and the coun- 
 sels of the housekeeper, who knew not how 
 either to lead or to rule her. It was thus 
 determined to send her to Madam Eibotte's 
 academy at Bristol, — for even so early as 
 King Charles's time had outlandish and 
 new-fangled names been found for Schools; 
 and thither she was accordingly sent, with 
 instructions that she was to learn all the
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 47 
 
 polite arts and accomplishments proper to 
 lier station, that she was to be kept under a 
 strict regimen, and corrected of her faults ; 
 but that she was not to be thwarted in her 
 reasonable desires. She was to have her 
 pony, with John coachman on the skewball 
 sent to fetch her every Saturday and holiday; 
 was not to be overweighted with tedious 
 and dragging studies; and was by no 
 means to be subject to those shameful 
 chastisements of the Ferula and the Eod, 
 which, even within my own time, I blush 
 to say had not been banished from schools 
 for young gentlewomen. To sum up. Miss 
 Arabella Greenville went to school with a 
 pocketful of gold pieces, and a play-chest full 
 of sweet-cakes and preserved fruits, and with 
 a virtual charter for learning as little as she 
 chose, and doing pretty well as much as she 
 liked. 
 
 Of course my Grandmother ran a fair 
 chance of being wholly spoiled, and growing 
 up to one of those termagant, mammythrept 
 romps we used to laugh at in Mr. Colley
 
 48 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Gibber's plays. The schoolmistress fawned 
 upon her, for, although untitled, Esquire 
 Greenville (from whom my descent is plain), 
 and he was so much respected in the West, 
 that the inkeepers w^re used to beseech him 
 to set up achievments of his arms at tlie 
 hotels wliere he baited on liis journeys, was 
 one of the most considerable of the County 
 Gentry ; the teachers were glad when she 
 would treat them from her abundant store 
 of play-money ; and she was a kind of 
 divinity among the schoolmaids her compa- 
 nions, to whom she gave so many cakes and 
 sweetmeats that the apothecary had to be 
 called in about once a week to cure many of 
 surfeit. But this fair young llower-bed was 
 saved from blight and choking weeds, first, 
 by the innate rectitude and nobility of her 
 disposition, which (save only when that 
 dangerous look was in her eyes) taught her 
 to keep a rein over her caprices, and subdue 
 a too warm and vigorous imagination ; next, 
 by the entire absence of Vanity and Self- 
 Conceifc in her mind, — a happy state, which
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 49 
 
 made her equally alive to her own faults and 
 to the excellences of others ; and, last, by 
 her truly prodigious aptitude for polite 
 learning. I have often been told that but 
 for adverse circumstances Mrs. Greenville 
 must have proved one of the most learned, 
 as she was one of the wittiest and best-bred, 
 women of her Age and Country. In the 
 languages, in all manner of fine needlework, 
 in singing and fingering instruments of 
 music, in medicinal botany and the know- 
 ledge of diseases, in the making of the most 
 cunning electuaries and syllabubs, and even 
 in Arithmetic, — a science of which young 
 gentlewomen were then almost wholly 
 deficient, — she became, before she was six- 
 teen years of age, a truly wonderful pro- 
 ficient. A Bristol bookseller spoke of 
 printing her book of recipes (containing 
 some excellent hints on cookery, physic, the 
 casting of nativities, and farriery) ; and some 
 excellent short hymns she wrote are, I 
 believe, sung to this day in one of the Bristol 
 free-schools. But the talent for which she 
 
 VOL. I. E
 
 50 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 was most shiningly remarkable was in that 
 difficult and laborious art of Painting in 
 Oils. Her early drawings, both in crayons 
 and Chinese ink, were very noble ; and there 
 are in this House now some miniatures of 
 her father, brother, and school-companions, 
 limned by her in a most delicate and lovely 
 fashion ; but *twas in oils and in por- 
 traiture of the size of life that she most 
 surpassed. She speedily out-went all that 
 the best masters of this craft in Bristol 
 could teach her; and her pictures — espe- 
 cially one of her Father, in his buff coat 
 and breastplate, as a Colonel of the Militia 
 — were the wonder, not only of Bristol, but 
 of all Somerset and the counties adjacent. 
 
 About this time those troubles in the 
 West, with which the name of Prince 
 Bupert is so sadly allied, grew to be of such 
 force and fury as to decide Mr. Greenville 
 on going to London, taking his daughter 
 Arabella with him, to make interest with 
 the Parliament, so that peril might be 
 averted from his estate. For although his
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 51 
 
 son was in arms for King Charles, and he 
 himself was a gentleman of approved loyalty, 
 he had done nothing of an overt kind to 
 favour King or Parliament. He thus hoped, 
 having ever been a peaceable and law- worthy 
 gentleman, to preserve his lands from peril, 
 and himself and family from prosecution; 
 and it is a great error to suppose that many 
 honest gentlemen did not so succeed in the 
 very fiercest frenzy of the civil wars in 
 keeping their houses over their heads, and 
 their heads upon their shoulders. Witness 
 worthy Mr. John Evelyn of Wotton and 
 Sayes Court, and many other persons of 
 repute. 
 
 While the Esquire was intent on his 
 business at Westminster, and settling the 
 terms of a Fine, without which it seemed 
 even his peaceable behaviour could not be 
 compounded, he lay at the house of a friend. 
 Sir Eortunatus Geddings, a Turkey merchant, 
 who had a fair house in the street leading 
 directly to St. Paul's Church, just without 
 Ludgate. The gate has been pulled down 
 E 2 
 
 UNIVERSITY OF ILUNOlb
 
 52 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 this many a day, and the place where lie 
 dwelt is now called Lndgate Hill. As he 
 had much going to and fro, and was afraid 
 that his daughter might come to hurt, both 
 in the stoppage to her schooling, and in the 
 unquietness of the times, he placed her for 
 a while at a famous school at Hackney, under 
 that notable governante Mrs. Desaguiliers. 
 And here Mrs. Greenville had not been for 
 many weeks ere the strangest adventure in 
 the world — as strange as any one of my own 
 — ^befel her. The terrible battle of Naseby 
 had by this time been fought, and the King's 
 cause was wholly ruined. Among other Cava- 
 liers fortunate enough to escape from that 
 deadly fray, and who were in hiding from the 
 vengeance of the usurping government, was 
 
 the Lord Francis V s, younger son to 
 
 that hapless Duke of B m who was slain 
 
 at Portsmouth by Captain F n. It 
 
 seems almost like a scene in a comedy to 
 tell ; and, indeed, I am told that Tom 
 D'Urfey did turn the only merry portion of 
 it into a play ; but it appears that, among
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 53 
 
 other shifts to keep his disguise, the Lord 
 Francis, who was highly skilled in all the 
 accomplishments of the age, was fain to 
 enter Mrs. Desaguiliers' school at Hackney 
 in the hahit of a dancins^-master, and that as 
 such he taught corantoes and rounds andqyres 
 to tlie young gentlewomen. Whether the 
 governante, who was herself a stanch royalist, 
 winked at the deception, I know not ; but her 
 having done so is not improbable. Stranger 
 to relate, the Lord Francis brouo^ht with him 
 a Companion who Avas, forsooth, to teach 
 French and the cittern, and who was no other 
 than Captain Eichard, son to the Esquire 
 of the West countr}^, and who was like- 
 wise inveterately pursued by the Usurper. 
 The brother recognised his sister — to wdiat 
 joy and contentment on both their parts I 
 need not say ; but ere the false Dancing- 
 Master had played his part many days, he fell 
 madly in love with Arabella Greenville. To 
 her sorrow and wretchedness, my poor Grand- 
 mother returned his Flame. Not that the 
 Lord Francis stands convicted of any Base
 
 54 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Designs upon her. I am afraid that he had 
 been as wild and as reckless as most of the 
 yonng nobles of his day ; but for this young 
 woman at least his love was pure and 
 ^honourable. He made no secret of it to his 
 fast friend, Captain Eichard (my Grand- 
 uncle), who would soon have crossed swords 
 with the Spark had any villany been afloat ; 
 and he made no more ado, as was the duty 
 of a Brother jealous of his sister's fair fame, 
 but to write his father word of what had 
 chanced. The Esquire was half terrified and 
 half flattered by the honour done to his 
 family by the Lord Francis. The poor 
 young man was under the very sternest of 
 proscriptions, and it was openly known that 
 if the Parliament laid hold on him his death 
 was certain. Bat, on the other hand, the 
 Esquire loved his daughter above all things ; 
 and one short half-hour, passed witli her 
 alone at Hackney, persuaded him that he 
 must either let Arabella's love-passion have 
 its vent, or break her heart for ever. And, 
 take my word for it, you foolish parents
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 55 
 
 who would thwart your children in this the 
 most sacred moment of their lives, — 
 thwart them for no reasonable cause, but 
 only to gratify your own pride of purse, 
 avarice, evil tempers, or love of meddling, 
 — you are but gathering up bunches of* 
 nettles wherewith to scourge your own 
 shoulders, and strewing your own beds with 
 shards and pebbles. Take the advice of 
 old John Dangerous, who suffered his 
 daughter to marry the man of her choice, 
 and is happy in the thought that she enjoys 
 happiness ; and I should much wish to know 
 if there be any Hatred in the world so 
 dreadful as that curdled love, as that 
 reverence decayed, as that obedience m 
 ruins, you see in a proud haughty daughter 
 married against her will to one she holds in 
 loathing, and who points her finger, and 
 says within herself, " My father and mother 
 made me marry that man, and I am 
 Miserable/' 
 
 It was agreed amongst those who had 
 most right to come to an agreement in the
 
 5G THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 matter, that as a first step the Lord Francis 
 
 V s should betake himself to some other 
 
 place of hiding, as more in keeping with 
 Mrs. Greenville's honour; but that, with 
 the consent of her father and brother, he 
 should be solemnly betrothed to lier ; and 
 that, so soon as the troubles were over, or that 
 the price which was upon his head were 
 taken off, he should become her husband. 
 And there was even a saving clause added, 
 that if the national disturbances unhappily 
 continued, Mrs. Greenville should be pri- 
 vately conveyed abroad, and that the Lord 
 Francis should marry her so soon after a 
 certain lapse of time as he could conveniently 
 
 get beyond sea. My Lord Duke of B m 
 
 had nothing to say against tlie match, loving 
 his brother, as he did, very dearly ; and so, 
 in the very roughest of times, this truest of 
 true loves seemed to l)id fair to have a smooth 
 course. 
 
 But alas the day ! i\[y Grandmother's 
 passion for the young Lord was a verj' mad- 
 ness. On his part, he idolised her, calling
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 57 
 
 her by names and writing her letters that 
 are nonsensical enough in common life, but 
 which are not held to be foolish pleas in 
 Love's Chancery. When the boy and girl 
 — for they were scarcely more — parted, she 
 gave him one of her rich brown tresses ; he 
 gave her one of his own dainty love-locks. 
 They broke a broad piece in halves between 
 them ; each hung the fragment by a ribbon 
 next the heart. They swore eternal fidelity, 
 devotion. Naught but Death should part 
 them, they said. Foolish things to say and 
 do, no doubt ; but I look at my grizzled old 
 head in the glass, and remember that I have 
 said and done things quite as foolish forty — 
 fifty years ago. 
 
 Nothing but Death was to part them; 
 and nothing but Death so parted them. 
 The Esquire Greenville, his business being 
 brought to a pleasant termination, having 
 paid his Fine and gotten his Safe-Conduct 
 and his Eedemption from Sequestration, be- 
 took himself once more to the West. His 
 daughter went with him, nourishing her
 
 58 
 
 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 love and fondling it, and dwelling, syllable 
 by syllable, on the letters wliicli the Lord 
 Francis sent her from time to time. He 
 was in hopes, he said, to get away to Hol- 
 land. 
 
 Then came that wicked business of the 
 King's Murder. Mr. Greenville, as became 
 a loyal gentleman, was utterly dismayed at 
 that horrid crime ; but to Arabella the news 
 was as of the intelligence of the death of 
 some loved and revered friend. She wept, 
 she sobbed, she called on Heaven to shower 
 down vengeance on the Murderers of her 
 gracious Prince. She had not heard from 
 her betrothed for many days, and those who 
 loved and watched her had marked a strange 
 wild way with her. 
 
 It was on the fourth of February that the 
 dreadful news of the Whitehall tragedy 
 came to her father's house. She was walk- 
 ing on the next day very moodily in the 
 garden, when the figure of one booted and 
 spurred, and with the stains of many days' 
 travel on his dress, stood across her path.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 59 
 
 He was but a clown, a mere boor ; lie had 
 been a ploughboy on lier father's lands, and 
 had run away to join Captain Eichard, who 
 had made him a trumpeter in his troop. 
 What he had to say was told in clumsy 
 speech, in hasty broken accents, with sighs 
 and stammerings and blubberings ; but he 
 told his tale too well. 
 
 The Lord Francis Y s aiid Captain 
 
 Eichard Greenville — Arabella's lover, Ara- 
 bella s brother — were both Dead. On the 
 eve of the fatal thirtieth of January they 
 had been taken captives in a tilt-boat on the 
 Thames, in which they were endeavouring 
 to escape down the river. They had at once 
 been tried by a court-martial of rebel offi- 
 cers ; and on the thirtieth day of that black 
 month, by express order sent from the Lord 
 General Cromwell in London, tliese two 
 gallant and unfortunate gentlemen had been 
 shot to death by a file of musketeers in the 
 courtyard of Hampton Court Palace. The 
 trumpeter had by a marvel escaped, and 
 lurked about Hampton till the dreadful
 
 60 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OP 
 
 deed was over. He had sought out the 
 sergeant of the firing party, and questioned 
 him as to the last moments of the con- 
 demned. The sergeant said that they died 
 as Malignants, and without showing any 
 sign of Penitence ; but he could not 
 gainsay that their bearing was soldier- 
 like. 
 
 Arabella heard this tale without moving. 
 
 " Did the Captain — did my brother — say 
 aught before they slew him ?" she asked. 
 
 *' Nowt but this, my lady : 'God forgive 
 us all !' " 
 
 " And the Lord Francis, said he aught ?" 
 
 " Ay; but I dunno loike to tell." 
 
 " Say on." 
 
 " 'Twas t' Sergeant tould un. A' blessed 
 the King, and woud hev' t' souldiers drink 
 's health, but t]iey wouldno'. And a' would- 
 no' let un bandage uns eyes ; an' jest befwoar 
 t' red cwoats foired, a' touk a long lock o' 
 leddy's hair from 's pocket and kissed un, 
 and cried out 'Bloud for Bloud !' and then 
 a' died all straisfht aloncf."
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. Gl 
 
 Mrs. Arabella Greenville drew from lier 
 bosom a long wavy lock of silken hair, — liis 
 hair, poor boy ! — and kissed it, and crying 
 out " Blood for Blood !" she fell down in the 
 garden-path in a dead faint. 
 
 She did not Die, however, being spared 
 for many Purposes, some of them Terrible, 
 until she was nearly ninety years of age. 
 But her first state was worse than death ; 
 she lying for many days in a kind of trance 
 or lethargy, and then waking up to raving 
 madness. For the best part of that year, 
 she was a perfect maniac, from whom no- 
 thing could be got but gibberings and 
 plungings, and ceaseless cries of " Blood 
 for Blood !" The heir-at-law to the estate, 
 now that the Esquire's son was dead, watched 
 her madness with a cautelous avaricious 
 desire. He was a sour Parliament man, 
 who had pinned his faith to the Common- 
 wealth, and done many Awakening things 
 against the Cavaliers, and he thought 
 now that he should have his reward, and 
 Inherit.
 
 62 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 It was so destined, however, that my 
 Grandmother should recover from that Ma- 
 lady. On her beauty it left surprisingly 
 few traces. You could only tell the change 
 that had taken place in her by the deathly 
 paleness of her visage, by her never smiling, 
 and by that Fierce Expression in her eyes 
 being now an abiding instead of a passing 
 one. Beyond these, she was herself again ; 
 and after a little while went to her domestic 
 concerns, and chiefly to the cultivation of 
 that pleasing art of Painting in Oils in which 
 she had of old time given such fair promise 
 of excellence. Her father would haA^e had 
 several most ingenious examples of History 
 and Scripture pieces by the Italian and 
 Flemish masters bought for her to study 
 by, — such copies being then very plentiful, 
 by reason of the dispersing of the collections 
 of many noblemen and gentlemen on the 
 King's side ; but this she would not suffer, 
 saying that it were waste of time and money, 
 and, with astonishing zeal, applied herself 
 to the branch of portraiture. From a little
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 63 
 
 miniature portrait of lier dead Lord, drawn 
 by Mr. Cooper, she painted in large many 
 fair and noble presentments, varying them 
 according to lier linmonr, — now showing 
 the Lord Francis in his panoply as a man 
 of war, now in a court habit, now in an 
 embroidered night-gown and Turkish cap, 
 now leaning on the shoulder of her brother, 
 the Captain, deceased. And anon she would 
 make a ghastly image of him lying all along 
 in the courtyard at Hampton Court, with 
 the purple bullet-marks on his white fore- 
 head, and a great crimson stain on his 
 bosom, just below his bands. This was the 
 one she most loved to look upon, although 
 her father sorely pressed her to put it by, 
 and not dwell on so uncivil a theme, the 
 more so as, in Crimson Characters, on the 
 background she had painted the words 
 " Blood for Blood." But whatever she 
 did was now taken little account of, for all 
 thought her to be distraught. 
 
 By and by she fell to quite a new order 
 in her painting. She seemed to take infinite
 
 04 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 pleasure in making portraitures of Oliver 
 Cromwell, who had hy this time become 
 Lord Protector of the Commonwealth. She 
 had never seen that Bold Bad Man (the 
 splendour of whose mighty achievements 
 must for ever remain tarnished by his blood- 
 guiltiness in the matter of the King's 
 Murther) ; but from descriptions of his 
 person, for which she eagerly sought, and 
 from bustos, pictures, and prints cut in brass, 
 which she obtained from Bristol and else- 
 where, she produced some surprising resem- 
 blances of him who was now the Greatest 
 Man in England. She painted him at full 
 and at half length — in full-face, profile, and 
 three-quarter ; but although she w^ould show 
 her work to her intimates, and ask eagerly 
 " Is it like — is it like him ?" she would 
 never part with one copy (and there were 
 good store of time-servers ready to buy the 
 Protector's picture at that time), nor could 
 any tell how she disposed of them. 
 
 This went on until the summer of the 
 year 1G57, when her father gently put it to
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 65 
 
 lier that she had worn the willow long 
 enough, and would have had her ally herself 
 with some gentleman of worth and parts 
 in that part of the country. For the poor 
 Esquire desired that she should be his heiress, 
 and that a man-child should be born to the 
 Grreenville estate, and thus the heir-at-law, 
 who was a wretched attorney at Bristol, and 
 more bitter against kings than ever, should 
 not inherit. She was not to be moved, 
 however, towards marriage ; saying softly 
 that she was already wedded to her Frank 
 in heaven, — for so she spoke of the Lord 
 
 Francis V s, — and that her union had 
 
 been blessed by her brother Dick, who was 
 in Heaven too, with King Charles and all 
 the Blessed Army of Martyrs. And I have 
 heard, indeed, that the unhappy business of 
 the King's death was the means of so crazing, 
 or casting into a Sad Celibacy and Devouring 
 Melancholy, multitudes of comely young 
 women who were born for love and de- 
 lights, and to be the smiling motlicrs of 
 many children. 
 
 VOL. T. F
 
 66 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 So, seeing that lie could do nothing with 
 her, and loth to use any unhandsome pres- 
 sure towards one whom he loved as the 
 Apple of his Eye, the Esquire began to 
 think it might divert her mind to more 
 cheerful thoughts if she quitted for a season 
 that part of the country (for it was at 
 Home that she had received the dreadful 
 news of her misfortune) ; and. Sir Fortu- 
 natus Geddings and his family being ex- 
 tremely willing to receive her, and do her 
 honour, he despatched Arabella to London, 
 under protection of Mr. Landrail, his steward, 
 a neighbour of his. Sir Hardress Eustis, 
 lending his Coach for the journe}'. 
 
 Being now come to London, every means 
 which art could devise, or kindness could 
 imagine, were made use of by Sir Fortunatus, 
 his wife, and daughter, to make Arabella's 
 life happier. But I should tell you a strange 
 thinof that came about at her father's house 
 the day after she left it for the Town. Mr. 
 Greenville chanced to go in a certain long 
 building (by the side of his pleasure-pond)
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. C7 
 
 that was used as a boat-house, when, to his 
 
 amazement, he sees, piled up against the 
 
 wall, a number of pictures, some completed, 
 
 some but half finished, but all representing 
 
 the Lord Protector Cromwell. But the 
 
 strangest thing about them was, that in 
 
 every picture the canvas about the head 
 
 was pricked through and through in scores 
 
 of places with very fine clean holes, and, 
 
 looking around in his marvel, he found an 
 
 arbalist or cross-bow, with some very sharp 
 
 bolts, and was so led to conjecture that 
 
 some one had been setting these heads of 
 
 the Protector up as a target, and shooting 
 
 bolts at them. He was at first minded to 
 
 send an express after his daughter to London 
 
 to question her if she knew aught of tlie 
 
 matter ; but on second thoughts he desisted, 
 
 remembering that in the Message, almost, 
 
 (as the times stood) there was Treason, and 
 
 concluding that, after all, it might be but 
 
 some idle fancy of Arabella, and part of the 
 
 Demi-Craze under which she laboured. For 
 
 there could be no manner of doubt that the 
 
 r2
 
 68 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Pictures, if not tlie Holes in them, were of 
 her handiwork. 
 
 Meanwhile Arabella was being entertained 
 in the stateliest manner by Sir Fortunatus 
 Geddings, who stood in great favour with 
 the government, and had, during the trou- 
 bles, assisted the Houses with large sums 
 of money. There were then not many 
 sports or amusements wherewith a sorrow- 
 ing maiden could be diverted ; for the 
 temper of England's Eulers was against 
 vain pastimes and junketings. The May- 
 poles had been pulled down ; the players 
 whipped and banished ; the bear and bull 
 baitings, and even the mere harmless min- 
 strelsy and ballad-singing of the streets, all 
 rigorously pulled down. But whatever the 
 worthy Turkey merchant and his household 
 could do in the way of carrying Arabella 
 about to suppers, christenings, counhy 
 gatherings, and so forth, was cheerfully 
 and courteously done. Sir Fortunatus 
 maintained a coach (for he was one of the 
 richest merchants in the City of London),
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. C9 
 
 and in this conveyance Arabella was oft- 
 times taken to drive in H3^de Park, or 
 towards the Uxbridge Eoad. 'Twas on one 
 of these occasions that she first saw the 
 Protector, who likewise was in his coach, 
 drawn by eight Holstein mares, and at- 
 tended by a troop of Horse, very gallantly 
 appointed, with scarlet livery coats, bright 
 gorgets and back-pieces, and red plumes in 
 their hats. 
 
 "He is very like, very like," she mur- 
 mured, looking long and earnestly at the 
 grand cavalcade. 
 
 " Like unto Whom, my dear ?" asked Mrs. 
 Nancy Geddings, the youngest daughter of 
 Sir Fortunatus, who was her companion in 
 the coach that day. 
 
 " Very like unto him who is at Home in 
 the West yonder," she made answer. "Now 
 take me back to Ludgate, Nancy sweet, for 
 I am Sick." 
 
 She was to be humoured in everything, 
 and she was taken back as she desired. It 
 chanced, a few days after this, that word
 
 70 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 came that his Highness the Lord Protector 
 of the Commonwealth of England (for to 
 such State had Oliver grown) designed to 
 visit the City, to dine with the citizens at 
 Guildhall. There was to be a great Pageant. 
 He was to be met at Temple Bar by the 
 Mayor and Aldermen, and to be escorted 
 towards Cheapside by those city Trainbands 
 which had done such execution on the Par- 
 liament side during the wars, and by the 
 Companies with their Livery banners. Fo- 
 reign Ambassadors were to bear him com- 
 pany ; for Oliver was then at the height of 
 his power, and had made the name of 
 England dreaded, and even his own prowess 
 respected, by all nations that were beyond 
 sea. He was to hear a sermon at Bow 
 Church at noon, and at two o'clock — for the 
 preacher was to be Mr. Hugh Peters, who 
 always gave his congregation a double turn 
 of the hour-glass — he was to dine at the 
 Guildhall, where I know not how many 
 geese, bustards, capons, pheasants, rutfs and
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 71 
 
 reeves, sirloins, shoulders of veal, pasties, 
 sweet puddings, jellies, and custards, with 
 good store of Elienish and Buckrack and Ca- 
 nary, and Bordelais and Gascoin wines, were 
 provided to furnish a banquet worthy of the 
 day. For although the Protectorate was a 
 stern sad period, and Oliver was (or had 
 schooled himself to be) a temperate man, 
 the citizens had not quite forgotten their 
 love of good cheer ; and the Protector 
 himself was not averse from the keeping 
 up some state and splendour, Whitehall 
 being now well-nigh as splendid as in the 
 late King's time, and his Highness sitting 
 with his Make-Believe Lords around him 
 (Lisle, "Whitelocke, and the rest), and eating 
 his meat to tuckets upon Trumpets, and 
 being otherwise puffed up with Yanity. 
 
 The good folks with whom Arabella was 
 sojourning thought it might help to cure 
 her of her sad moping ways if she saw the 
 grand pageant go by, and mingled in the 
 merriment and feasting which the ladies of
 
 72 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Sir Fortunatus's family — the Knisrlit him- 
 self being bidden to the Guildhall — pro- 
 posed to give their neighbours on the day 
 when Oliver came into the City. To this 
 intent, the windows of their house without 
 Ludgate were all taken out of their frames, 
 and the casements themselves huncr with 
 rich cloths and tapestries, and decked with 
 banners. And an open house was kept, 
 literally ; meats and wines and sweets being 
 set out in every room, even to the bed- 
 chambers, and all of the Turkey merchant's 
 acquaintance being bidden to come in and 
 help themselves, and take a squeeze at the 
 windows to see his Highness go b3^ Only 
 one window on the first floor was set apart, 
 and here sat the Ladies of the family, with 
 Mistress Deborah Clay, the Eemembrancer's 
 lady, and one that was sister to a Judge of 
 Commonwealth's Bench, and Arabella Green- 
 ville, who was, for a wonder, quite cheerful 
 and sprightly that morning, and who had 
 for her neighbour one Lad}' Lisle, the wife 
 of John Lisle, one of Cromwell's Chief
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 76 
 
 Councillors and Commissioners of the Great 
 Seal.* 
 
 The time that passed between their tak- 
 ing seats and the coming of the pageant 
 was passed pleasantly enough ; not in 
 drinking of healths, which practice was 
 then considered as closely akin to an un- 
 lawful thing, but in laughing and quaffing, 
 and whispering of merr}^ jests. For I have 
 usually found that, be the Eule of Church 
 and State ever so sour and stern, folks tuill 
 laugh and quaff and jest on the sly, and be 
 merry in the green tree, if they are forced 
 to be sad in the dry. 
 
 * This Lady Lisle was a very virulent partisan 
 woman, and, according to my Grandmother's showing, 
 was so bitter against the Crown that, being taken, 
 when a young woman, to witness the execution of King 
 Charles, and seeing one wlio pressed to the scaffold 
 after the blow to dip her kerchief in the Martyr's 
 blood, she cried out " that she needed no such relic ; 
 but that she would willingly drink the Tyrant's 
 blood." This is the same Alice Lisle who afterwards, 
 in King James's time, suffered at Winchester for har- 
 bouring two of the Western Rebels.
 
 74 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 There was a gentleman standing behind 
 Arabella, a Counsellor of Lincoln's Inn I 
 think, who was telling a droll story of 
 Lord President Bradshaw to his friend from 
 the Temple. Not greatly a person of whom 
 to relate merry tales, I should think, that 
 terrible Bencher, who sat at the head of the 
 High Commission, clothed in his scarlet 
 robe, and passed judgment upon his lord 
 the King. But still these gentlemen 
 laughed loud and long, as one told the 
 other how the President lay very sick, sick 
 almost to death, at his country house ; and 
 how, he being one that was in the Commis- 
 sion of the Chancellorship, had taken them 
 away with him, and would by no means 
 surrender them, keeping them under his 
 pillow, night and day ; wherefore one of his 
 brother commissioners was fain to seek 
 him out, and press him hard to give up the 
 seals, saying that the business of the nation 
 was at a Standstill, for they could neither 
 seal patents nor pardons. But all in vain, 
 Bradshaw crying out in a voice tliat, though
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 75 
 
 weak, was still terrible, that lie would never 
 give them up, but would carry them with 
 him into the next world ; whereat quoth 
 
 the other commissioner, " By , My Lord 
 
 President, they loill certainly melt if you do^ 
 And at this tale the gentleman ftom Lin- 
 coln's Inn and he from the Temple both 
 laughed so, that Arabella, who had been 
 listening without eavesdropping, burst into 
 a fit of laughter too ; only my Lady Lisle 
 (who had likewise heard the Story) regarded 
 her with a very grim and dissatisfied coun- 
 tenance, and murmured that she thought a 
 little trailing up before the Council, and 
 committing to the Grate-house, would do 
 some popinjays some good, and cure them 
 of telling tales as treasonable as they were 
 scurrilous. 
 
 But now came a great noise of trumpets 
 and hautboys and drums, and the great 
 pageant came streaming up towards Lud- 
 gate, a troop of Oliver's own Body-guard on 
 iron-grey chargers clearing the way, which 
 they did with scant respect for the lives and
 
 76 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 limbs of the crowd, and with very little 
 scruple either in bruising the Trainbands 
 with their horses' hoofs and the flat of their 
 broadswords. As Arabella leant forward to 
 see the show approach, something hard, and 
 it would seem of metal, that she carried be- 
 neath her mantle, struck against the arm of 
 my Lady Lisle, who, being a woman of 
 somewhat quick temper, cried out, 
 
 " Methinks that you carry a pocket-flask 
 with you. Mistress Greenville, instead of a 
 vial of essences. That which you have 
 must hold a pint at least.'' 
 
 " I do carry such a flask," answered Ara- 
 bella, "and please God, there are those 
 here to-day who shall drink of it even to the 
 Dregs." 
 
 This speech was afterwards remembered 
 against her as a proof of her Intent. 
 
 All, however, were speedily too busy 
 with watching the Show go by to take much 
 heed of any word passage between the two 
 women. Now it was Mistress Deborah 
 Clay pointing out the Eemembrancer to
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 77 
 
 lier gossip ; now the flaunting banners 
 of the Companies, now the velvet robes of 
 the Lords of the Council were looked upon ; 
 now a Grreat Cry arose that his Highness 
 was coming. 
 
 He came in his coach drawn by the eight 
 Holstein mares, one of his lords by his side, 
 and his two chaplains, with a gentleman of 
 the bed-chamber sitting over against. He 
 wore a rich suit of brown velvet purfled with 
 white satin, a bright gorget of silver, — men 
 said that he wore mail beneath his clothes, 
 — startups and gauntlets of yellow Spanish, a 
 great baldric of cloth-of-gold, and in his hat 
 a buckle of diamonds and a red feather. 
 Yet, bravely as he was attired, those who 
 knew him declared that they had never seen 
 Oliver look so careworn and so miserable as 
 he did that day. 
 
 By a kind of Fate, he turned his glance 
 upwards as he passed the house of the Tur- 
 key merchant, and those Cruel Eyes met the 
 fierce gaze of Arabella Greenville. 
 
 " Blood for Blood !" she cried out in a
 
 78 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 loud clear voice ; and she drew a Pistol 
 from the folds of her mantle, and fired 
 downwards, and with good aim, at the 
 Protector's head. 
 
 My Lady Lisle saw the deed done. 
 " Jezebel !" she shrieked, striking the 
 weapon from Arabella's hand. 
 
 Oliver escaped unharmed, but by an 
 almost miracle. The bullet had struck 
 him as it was aimed, directly in the centre 
 of his forehead, he wearing his hat much 
 slouched over his brow ; but it had struck — 
 not his skull, but the diamond buckle, and 
 glancing off from that hard mass, sped out 
 of the coach-window again, on what errand 
 none could tell, for it was heard of no more. 
 I have often wondered what became of all 
 the bullets I have let fly. 
 
 The stoppage of the coach ; tlie Protector 
 half stunned; the chaplain paralysed with 
 fear; the Trainbands in a frenzy — half of 
 terror, half of strong drink — firing off their 
 pieces hap-hazard at the windows, and
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 79 
 
 shouting out that this was a plot of the 
 Papists or the Malignants ; the crowd surg- 
 ing, the Body-Gruard galloping to and fro ; 
 the poor standard-bearers tripping them- 
 selves up with their own poles, — all this 
 made a mad turmoil in the street without 
 Ludgate. But the Protector had speedily 
 found all his senses, and had whispered a 
 word or two to a certain Sergeant in whom 
 he placed great trust, and pointed his finger 
 to a certain window. Then the Sergeant 
 being gone away, orders were given for the 
 pageant to move on; and through Lud- 
 gate, and by Paul's, and up Cliepe, and 
 to Bow Church, it moved accordingly. Mr. 
 Hugh Peters preached for two hours as 
 though nothing had happened. Being 
 doubtless under instructions, he made not 
 the slightest allusion to the late tragic 
 Attempt ; and at the banquet afterwards at 
 the Guildhall, there were only a few trifling 
 rumours that his Highness had been shot 
 at by a mad woman from a window in
 
 80 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Fleet street ; denial, however, being speedily 
 given to this by persons in Authority, who 
 declared that the disturbance without Lud- 
 gate had arisen simply from a drunken 
 soldier of the Trainbands firing his mus- 
 ketoon into the air for Joy. 
 
 But the Sergeant, with some soldiers ol 
 the Protector's own, walked tranquilly into 
 the house of Sir Fortunatus Geddin2:s, and 
 into the upper chamber, where the would-be 
 Avenger of Blood was surrounded by a 
 throng of men and women gazing upon her, 
 half in horror, and half in admiration. The 
 Sergeant beckoned to her, and she arose 
 without a murmur, and went with him and 
 the soldiers, two only being left as sentinels, 
 to see that no one stirred from the house 
 till orders came. By this time, from Lud- 
 gate to Blackfriars all was soldiers, the 
 crowed being thrust away east and west ; 
 and, between a lane of pikemen, Arabella 
 v^as brought into the street, hurried through 
 the narrow lanes behind Apothecaries' Hall,
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEllOUS. 81 
 
 and so through the alleys to Blackfriars 
 Stairs, where a barge was in waiting, which 
 bore her swiftly away to Whitehall. 
 
 " You have flown at High Game, mis- 
 tress,'' was the only remark made to her by 
 the Sergeant. 
 
 She was locked np for many hours in 
 an inner chamber, the windows being 
 closed, and a lamp set on the table. They 
 bound her, but, mindful of her sex and 
 youth, not in fetters, or even with ropes, 
 contenting themselves with fastening her 
 arms tightly behind her with the Sergeant's 
 silken sash. For the Sergeant was of 
 Cromwell's own guard, and was of great 
 authority. 
 
 At about nine at night the Sergeant and 
 two soldiers came for her, and so brouorht 
 her, through many lobbies, to Cromwell's 
 own closet, where she found him still 
 with his hat and baldric on, sitting at a 
 table covered with green velvet. 
 
 " What prompted thee to seek my Life ?" 
 
 VOL. I. G
 
 82 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 he asked, without anger, but in a slow, cold, 
 searching voice. 
 
 " Blood for Blood !" she answered, with 
 undaunted mien. 
 
 " "What evil have I done thee, that thou 
 shouldst seek my blood ?" 
 
 " What evil — what evil, Beelzebub? — all 1 
 Thou hast slain the King my Lord and 
 master. Thou hast slain the Dear Brother 
 who was my playmate, and my father's 
 hope and pride. Thou hast slain the Sweet 
 and Gallant Youth who was to have been 
 my husband." 
 
 " Thou are that Arabella Greenville, then, 
 the daughter of the wavering half-hearted 
 Esquire of the West." 
 
 " I am the daughter of a Gentleman of 
 Long Descent. I am Arabella Greenville, 
 an English Maid of Somerset ; and I cry for 
 vengeance for the blood of Charles Stuart, 
 for the blood of Eichard Greenville, for the 
 blood of Francis Yilliers. Blood for 
 Blood !"
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 83 
 
 That terrible gleam of Madness leapt out 
 of her blue eyes, and, all bound as she was, 
 she rushed towards the Protector, as though 
 in her fury she would have spurned him 
 with her foot, or torn him with her teeth. 
 The Sergeant for his part made as though 
 he would have drawn his sword upon her ; 
 but Oliver laid his hand on the arm of his 
 officer, and bade him forbear. 
 
 "Leave the maiden alone with me," he 
 said calmly ; " wait within call. She can do 
 no harm." Then, when the soldiers had 
 withdrawn, he walked to and fro in the room 
 for many minutes, ever and anon turning 
 his head and gazing fixedly on the pri- 
 soner, who stood erect, her head high, her 
 hands, for all their bonds, clenched in 
 defiance. 
 
 " Thou knowest," he said, " that thy Life 
 is forfeit." 
 
 " I care not. The sooner the better. I 
 ask but one Mercy : that you send me not 
 to Tyburn, but to Hampton Court ; there 
 g2
 
 84 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 to be shot to deatli in tlie courtyard by a 
 file of musketeers." 
 
 " Wherefore to Hampton ?" 
 
 '' Because it was there you murdered my 
 Lover and my Brother." 
 
 " I remember," the Protector said, bowing 
 his head. " They were rare Malignants, 
 both. I remember ; it vv^as on the same thir- 
 tieth of January that Charles Stuart died the 
 death. But shouldst thou not, too, bear in 
 mind that Vengeance is not thine, but the 
 Lord's ?" 
 
 "Blood for Blood!" 
 
 " Thou art a maiden of a stern Eesolve 
 and a strong AVill," said the Protector, 
 musingly. " If thou art pardoned, wilt 
 thou promise repentance and amendment ?" 
 
 "Blood for Blood!" 
 
 "Poor distraught creature," this Once 
 cruel man made answer, " I will have no 
 blood of thine. I have had enough," he 
 continued, with a dark look and a deep sigh ; 
 " I am weary ; and Blood will have Blood. 
 But that my life was in Mercy saved for the
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 85 
 
 weal of these kingdoms, tliou miglitst have 
 done with me, Arabella Greenville, accord- 
 ing to thy desires." 
 
 He paused, as though for some expression 
 of sorrow ; but she was silent. 
 
 " Thou art hardened," he resumed ; '' it 
 may be that there are things that cannot be 
 forgiven." 
 
 " There are," she said, firmly. 
 
 '*I spare thy life," the Lord Protector 
 continued ; " but, Arabella Greenville, thou 
 must go into Captivity. Until I am Dead, 
 we two cannot be at large together. Eut I 
 will not doom thee to a solitary prison. 
 Thou shalt have a companion in durance. 
 Yes," he ended, speaking between his teeth, 
 and more to himself than to her, "she shall 
 join Him yonder in his lifelong prison. 
 Blood for Blood ; the Slayer and the Aven- 
 ger shall be together." 
 
 She was taken back to her place of con- 
 finement, where meat and drink were placed 
 before her, and a tiring- woman attended her 
 with a change of garments. And at day-
 
 86 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OP 
 
 break the next morning she was taken 
 away in a litter towards Colchester in 
 
 Essex.* 
 
 * Those desirous of learning fuller particulars of my 
 Grandmother's History, or anxious to satisfy them- 
 selves that T have not Lied, should consult a book 
 called The Travels of Edward Brown, Esquire, that is 
 now in the Great Library at Montague House. Mr. 
 Brown is in most things curiously exact ; but he errs 
 in stating that Mrs. Greenville's name was Letitia, — 
 it was Arabella.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 87 
 
 CHAPTEE THE FOUETH. 
 
 MY GRANDMOTHER DIES, AND I AM LEFT ALONE, 
 WITHOUT SO MUCH AS A NAME. 
 
 I HAVE sat over against Death unnumbered 
 times in the course of a long and perilous 
 life, and he has appeared to me in almost 
 every shape ; but I shall never forget that 
 Thirtieth of January in the year '20, when 
 my Grrandmother died. I have seen men 
 all gashed and cloven about — a very mire 
 of blood and wounds, — and heads lying 
 about on the floor like ninepins, among the 
 Turks, where a man's life is as cheap as the 
 Halfpenny Hatch. I was with that famous 
 Commander Baron Trenck* when his Pan- 
 dours — of whom I was one — broke into 
 
 * The Austrian, not the Prussian Trenck. — Ed.
 
 88 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Mutiny. He drew a pistol from his belt, 
 and said, '' I shall decimate you." And he 
 began to count Ten, " one, two, three, four," 
 and so on, till he came to the tenth man, 
 whom he shot Dead. And then he took to 
 counting again, until he was arrived at the 
 second Tenth. That man's brains he also 
 blew out. I was the tenth of the third 
 batch, but I never blenched. Trenck hap- 
 pily held his hand before he came to Me. 
 The Pandours cried out that they would 
 submit, although I never spoke a word ; he 
 forgave us ; and I had a flask of Tokay with 
 him in his tent that very after-dinner. I 
 have seen a man keel-hauled at sea, and 
 brought up on the other side, his hice all 
 larded with barnacles like a Shrove-tide 
 capon. Thrice I have stood beneath the 
 yardarm with the rope round my neck 
 (owing to a king's ship mistaking the 
 character of my vessel).* I have seen men 
 
 * This does not precisely tally with the Captain's 
 disclaimer of feeling any apprehension when passing 
 Execution Dock. — Ed.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 89 
 
 scourged till the muscles of their backs 
 were laid bare as in a Theatre of Anatomy ; 
 I have watched women's limbs crackle and 
 frizzle in the flames at an Act of Faith, 
 with the King and Court — ay, and the 
 court-ladies too — looking on. I stood by 
 when that poor mad wretch Damiens was 
 pulled to pieces by horses in the Grreve. 
 I have seen what the plague could do in the 
 galleys at Marseilles. Death and I have 
 been boon companions and bedfellows. He 
 has danced a jig with me on a plank, and 
 ridden bodkin, and gone snacks with me 
 for a lump of horse-flesh in a beleaguered 
 town ; but no man can say that John 
 Dangerous had aught but a bold face to 
 show that Phantom who frights nursemaids 
 and rich idle people so. 
 
 And yet, now, I can recall the cold 
 shudder that passed through my young 
 veins when my Grandmother died. Of all 
 days, too, that the Thirtieth of January 
 should have been ordered for her passing 
 away ! It was mid-winter, and the streets
 
 90 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 were white with Innocent Snow when she 
 was taken ill. She had not been one of 
 those trifling and trivanting gentlewomen 
 that pull diseases on to their pates with 
 drums and routs, and late hours, and hot 
 rooms, and carding, and distilled waters. 
 She had ever been of a most sober conver- 
 sation and temperate habit ; so that the 
 prodigious age she reached became less of a 
 wonder, and the tranquillity with which her 
 spirit left this darksome house of clay 
 seemed mercifully natural. They had 
 noticed, so early as the autumn of ^19, that 
 she was decaying ; yet had the roots of life 
 stricken so strongly into earth as to defy 
 that Woodman who pins his faith to shaking 
 blasts at first, but when he finds that wind- 
 falls will not serve his turn, and that 
 although leaves decay, and branches are 
 swept away, and the very bark is stripped 
 ofi", the tree dies not, takes heart of grace, 
 and lays about him with his Axe. Then 
 one blow with the sharp sufiices. So for 
 many months Death seemed to let her be.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 
 
 91 
 
 as though he sat down quietly by her side, 
 nursing his bony chin, and saying, " She is 
 very old and weak ; yet a little, and she 
 must surely be mine." Mistress Talmash 
 appeared to me, in the fantastic imagination 
 of a solitary childhood, to take such a part, 
 and play it to the Very Death ; and there 
 were sidelong glances from her eyes, and 
 pressures of her lips, and a thrusting forth 
 of her hands when the cordial or the potion 
 was to be given, that seemed to murmur, 
 " Still does she Tarry, and still do I Wait." 
 This gentlewoman was never hard or im- 
 patient with my Grandmother ; but towards 
 the closing scene, for all the outward 
 deference she observed towards her, 'twas 
 she who commanded, and the Unknown 
 Lady who obeyed. Nor did I fail to mark 
 that her bearing was towards me fuller of a 
 kind of stern authority than she had of afore- 
 time presumed to show, and that she seemed 
 to be waiting for me too, that she might 
 work her will upon me. 
 
 The ecclesiastic Father Euddlestone was
 
 92 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 daily, and for many hours, closeted with my 
 kinswoman and benefactress ; and I often, 
 when admitted to her presence after one of 
 these parleys, found her much dejected, and 
 in Tears. He had always maintained a 
 ghostly sway over her, and was in these 
 latter days stern with her almost to harsh- 
 ness. And although I have ever disdained 
 eavesdropping and couching in covert places 
 to hear the foregatherings of my betters 
 (which some honourable persons in the 
 world's reckoning scorn not to do), it was 
 by Chance, and not by Design, that, playing 
 one wintry day in the Withdrawing-room 
 adjoining the closet where my Grandmother 
 still sat among her relics, I heard high 
 words — high, at least, as they affected one 
 person, for the lady's rose not above a mild 
 complaint ; and Father Euddlestone coming 
 out, said in an angry tone : 
 
 " My uncle saved the King's life when 
 he was in the Oak, and his soul when he 
 was at Whitehall ; and I will do his bidding 
 by you now."
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 93 
 
 " The Lord's will be done, not mine," my 
 Grandmother said meekly. 
 
 Then Father Euddlestone passed into the 
 Withdrawing-room, and seeing me on a 
 footstool, playing it is true at the Battle of 
 Hochstedt with some leaden soldiers, and 
 two wooden puppets for the Duke and 
 Prince Eugene, but still all agape at the 
 strange words that had hit my sense, he 
 catches me a buffet on tlie ear, bidding me 
 mind my play, and not listen, else I should 
 hear no good of myself, or of what an osier 
 wand might haply do to me. And that a 
 change was coming was manifest even in 
 this rude speech ; for my Grandmother, 
 albeit of the wise King's mind on the proper 
 ordering of children, and showing that she 
 did not hate me when I needed chastening, 
 would never suffer her Domestics, even to 
 the highest, to lay a finger upon me. 
 
 It was after these- things, and while I was 
 crying out, more in anger than with the 
 smart of the blow, that she called me into 
 her closet and soothed me, giving me to eat
 
 94 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OE 
 
 of that much-prized sweetmeat she said was 
 once such a favourite solace with Queen Mary 
 of Modena, consort of the late King James, 
 and which she only produced on rare occa- 
 sions. And then she bewailed my hurt, 
 but bade me not vex her Director, wlio was 
 a man of much holiness, full, when we 
 were contrite, of liealing and quieting 
 words ; but then, of a sudden, nippmg me 
 pretty sharply by the arm, she said : 
 
 " Child, I charge thee that thou abandon 
 that fair false race, and trust no man whose 
 name is Stuart, and abide not by their fatal 
 creed." In remembrance of which, although 
 I am. by descent a Cavalier, and bound by 
 many bonds to the old Noble House, — and 
 surely there was never a Prince that carried 
 about him more of the far-bearing blaze of 
 
 Majesty than the Chevalier de St. Gr- , 
 
 and bears it still, all broken as he is, in his 
 Italian retreat, — I have ever upheld the 
 illustrious House of Brunswick and the 
 Protestant Succession as b}^ Law Estab- 
 lished. And as the barkiuGf of a do<i do I
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 95 
 
 contemn tliose scurril flouts and obloquies 
 which liave of old times tossed me upon 
 tongues, and said of me that I should play 
 fast and loose with Jacobites and Hanove- 
 rians, drinking the King over the Water on 
 my knees at night, and going down to the 
 Cock-pit to pour news of Jacobites and 
 recusants and other suspected persons into 
 the ears of Mr. Secretary in the morning. 
 Treason is Death by the Law, and legal 
 testimony is not to be gainsaid; but I 
 abhor those Iscariot-minded wretches, with 
 faces like those who Torture the Saints in 
 old Hangings, who cry, aha! against 
 the sanctuaries, and trot about to bear 
 false witness.* 
 
 * I do not find it in the memoirs of liis adventures, 
 but in an old volume of the Annual Register T find that, 
 in the year 177<S, one Captain Dangerous gave import- 
 ant evidence for the crown against poor Mr. Tremen- 
 heere, who sufiered at Tyburn, for fetching and carry- 
 ing between the French King and some malcontents 
 in this country, notably forgiving information as to the 
 condition of our dockyards. — Ed.
 
 90 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OP 
 
 There were no more quarrels between my 
 Grandmother and her Director. Thenceforth 
 Father Euddlestone ruled over her ; and 
 one proof of his supremacy was, that she 
 forewent the use of that Common Prayer- 
 Book of our Anglican Church wdiich had 
 been her constant companion. From wdiich 
 I conjecture that, after long wavering and 
 temporizing, even to the length of having 
 the Father in her household, she had at 
 length returned to or adopted the ancient 
 faith. But although the Substance of our 
 Eitual was now denied her, she was per- 
 mitted to retain its Shadow ; and for hours 
 would sit gazing upon the torn-off cover of 
 the book, with its device of the crown and 
 crossed axes, in sad memory of K. C. V\ 
 
 A most mournful Christmas found her 
 still growing whiter and weaker, and nearer 
 her End. At this ordinarily joyful season of 
 the year, it was her commendable custom to 
 give great alms away to the poor, — among 
 whom at all times she was a ver}^ Dorcas, — 
 bestowing not only gifts of money to the
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 97 
 
 clergy for division among the needy, but 
 sendinfT also a dole of a hundred sliilliuscs to 
 the poor prisoners in the Marsh alsea, as 
 many to Ludgate, and the Gatehouse, and 
 the Fleet, — surely prisons for debt were as 
 plentiful as blackberries when I was young 1 
 — and giving away besides large store of 
 bread, meat, and blankets at her own door 
 in Hanover Square: a custom then pleasantly 
 common among people of quality, but now— • 
 w4ien your parish Overseer, forsooth, eats 
 np the very marrow of the poor — fallen 
 sadly into disuse. They are for ever strik- 
 ing Poor's Bates against householders, and 
 will not take clipped money ; whereas in my 
 day Private Charity, and a King's Letter in 
 aid from the pulpit now and then, were 
 enough ; and, for my part, I would sooner 
 see a poor rogue soundly firked at the post, 
 and then comforted with a bellyful of bread 
 and cheese and beer by the constable, and so 
 passed on to his belongings, than that he 
 should be clapped up in a workhouse, to 
 pick oakum and suck his paws like a bear, 
 
 VOL. I. H
 
 98 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 while Master Overseer gets tun-stomaclied 
 over shoulder of veal and burnt brandy at 
 vestry-dinners. For it is well-known, to the 
 shame of Authority, that these things all 
 come out of the Poor Eate. 
 
 Ere my Grrandmother was brought so low, 
 she would sit in state on almsgiving morn- 
 ing, which was the day after Christmas ; and 
 the more decent of her bedesmen and bedes- 
 women would be admitted to her presence to 
 pay their duty, and drink her health in a 
 cup of warm ale on the staircase. Also the 
 little children from Lady Yiellcastel's charity- 
 school would be brought to her by their 
 governante to have cakes and new groats 
 given to them, and to sing one of those 
 sweet tender Christmas hymns which surely 
 fall upon a man's heart like sweet-scented 
 balsam on a wound. And the beadle of St. 
 Greorge's would bring a great bowpot of such 
 hues as Cliristmas would lend itself to, and 
 have a bottle of wine and a bright broad 
 guinea for his fee ; while his Eeverence the 
 rector would attend with a suitable present.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 99 
 
 — such as a satin work-bag or a Groocl Book, 
 tlie cover broidered by his daughters, — and, 
 when he sat at meat, find a bank-bill under 
 his platter, which was always of silver. And 
 I warrant you his Keverence's eyes twinkled 
 as much at the bill as at the plum-porridge, 
 and that he feigned not to see Father Rud- 
 dlestone, if perchance he met that foreign 
 person on the staircase, or in the store-office 
 where Mistress Nancy Talmash kept many 
 a toothsome cordial and heart-v^arming 
 strong water. 
 
 This dismal Christmas none of these plea- 
 sant things were done. My Lady gave one 
 Sum to her steward, Mr. Cadwallader, and 
 bade him dispose of it according to his best 
 judgment among the afflicted, bearing not 
 their creed or politics or parish in mind, but 
 their necessities. And I was bereft of a 
 joyful day; for in ordinary she would be 
 pleased that I shoukV be her little almoner, 
 and hand the purses with the groats in 
 them to the poor almsfolk. What has be- 
 come, I wonder, of those good old customs 
 
 H 2
 
 100 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 of giving away things at Christ mas -tides ? 
 Where is the Lord Mayor's dole of heef- 
 pies to the vagrant people that lurk in St. 
 Martin's-le-Grand, that new Alsatia ? ^Yhere 
 is the Queen's gift of an hundred pounds to 
 the distressed people who took up quarters 
 in Somerset House ? Where are the thou- 
 sand guineas which tlie Majesty of England 
 was used to send every New-Year's morning 
 to the High Bailiff of Westminster to be 
 parted among the poor of the Liberty? 
 Nothing seems to be given nowadays. 'Tis 
 more caning than cakes that is gotten by 
 the charity children ; and Master Collector, 
 the Jackanapes, is for ever knocking at my 
 door for Poor's Eates. 
 
 Li the middle of January my Grand- 
 mother was yet weaker. Straw was laid 
 before her door, and daily prayers — for of 
 course the Eector knew nothing about 
 Father Euddlestone — Avere put up for her 
 at St. George's. And I think also she was 
 not forgotten in the orisons of those who 
 attended the chapel of the Venetian Envoy,
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 101 
 
 and in that permitted to the use of the 
 French Ambassador. Doctor Vigors was 
 now daily in attendance, with many other 
 learned physicians, who almost fought in 
 the antechambers on tlie treatment to be 
 observed towards this sick person. One 
 was for cataplasms of bran and Venice 
 turpentine, another for putting live pigeons 
 to her feet, another for a portion of hot 
 wine strained through gold-leaf and mingled 
 with hellebore and chips of mandrake. 
 Warwick Lane suggested mint-tea, and Pall 
 Mall was all for bleeding. This Pall Mall 
 physician was about the most passionate 
 little man, with the biggest ruffles and the 
 tallest gold-headed cane I ever sav/. His 
 name was Toobey. 
 
 " Blood, sir ! there's nothing like blood 1" 
 he would cry to Doctor Vigors ; and he 
 cried out for " blood, sir," till you might 
 fancy that he was a butcher or a herald- 
 at-arms, or a housewife making black 
 puddings. 
 
 Says Doctor Vigors in a Eage, " You
 
 102 THE STRANGE ADVEiNTURES OF 
 
 are nothing but a barber-surgeon, brother, 
 and learnt shaving on a sheep's head, and 
 phlebotomy on a cow that had the falling 
 fever." 
 
 " Mountebank and quacksalver !" answers 
 ni}^ passionate gentleman, " you bought 
 your diploma from one that forges sea- 
 men's certificates in Sopar Lane. Go to, 
 metamorphosed and two-legged ass ! Where 
 is your worship's stage in the Stocks Mar- 
 ket, with pills to purge the vapours, and 
 powders to make my lady in love with her 
 footman, and a lying proclamation on every 
 post, and a black boy behind you to beat on 
 the cymbals when you draw out teeth with 
 the kitchen pliers." 
 
 " Rogue !" screams Dr. Toobey, " but for 
 the w^orshipful house we are in, I would 
 batoon joii to a mummy." 
 
 " Mummy forsooth !" the other retorts ; 
 " Mummy with a murrain ! Why, you dug 
 up your grandmother, and pounded her up 
 with conserve of myrrh, and called the stuff
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 103 
 
 King Pliaraoli, that was sovereign to cure 
 the strangury." 
 
 " Better to do that," quoth Toobey, cahii- 
 ing down into mere give and take — for he 
 had, in truth, done some droll things in 
 mummy medicaments, — " than to have been 
 a Fleet parson, that was forced to sell ale 
 and couple beggars for a living, and turned 
 doctor when he had cured a bad leg for one 
 that had lain too long in the bilboes." 
 
 This was too much for Doctor Vigors, 
 who had once been in orders, and was still 
 a Nonjuror, winked at, for his skill's sake, 
 by Authority. He was for rushing on the 
 Pali-Mall mummy-doctor and tousling of 
 his wig, when Mistress Talmash came out 
 of her lady's closet, and told them that she 
 was fainting. This was the way that doc- 
 tors disagreed when I was young, and I 
 fancy that they don't agree much better 
 now. 
 
 She lingered on, however, still resolutely 
 refusing to take to her bed, and seeing me.
 
 104 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 if only for a moment, every day, for yet 
 another fortnight. On the Twentieth of 
 January, it was her humour to receive the 
 visit of a certain great nohleman. Very 
 many of the quality had daily waited upon 
 her, or had sent their gentlemen to inquire 
 after her ; but for many weeks she had seen 
 none hut her own household. The noble- 
 man I speak of had lately come down from 
 the Batli, where he had been taking the 
 waters ; for he was full of years, and of 
 Glory, and of infirmities. A message went 
 to his grand house in Pall ]\[all, and he 
 presently waited on my Grandmother. He 
 was closeted with her for an hour, when the 
 tap of my Grandmother's cane against the 
 wainscot summoned Mistress Talmash, and 
 she, doing her errand, brought me into the 
 presence. 
 
 " My Lord," whispered my Grandmother, 
 as she drew me towards her, and gave me a 
 kiss that was almost of a whisper too, so 
 feebly gentle was it, — " My Lord Duke, will 
 you be pleased to lay your hand on the
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 105 
 
 boy's head and give liim your blessing, and 
 it will make bim Brave." 
 
 He smiled sadly at her fancy, but did as 
 she entreated. He laid a hand that was all 
 covered with jewelled rings, and that shook 
 almost as much as my Grandmother's, on 
 my locks, and prattled out to me something 
 about being a good boy and not playing 
 cards. He, too, was almost gone. He had 
 a mighty wig, and velvet clothes all covered 
 with gold -lace, a diamond star, and broad 
 blue ribbon ; but his poor swollen legs were 
 swathed in flannel, and he was so feeble that 
 he had to be helped down-stairs by two 
 lacqueys. I too ran down-stairs unchecked, 
 and saw him helped, tottering, into his 
 chair, a company of tlie Foot-guards sur- 
 rounding it ; for he was much misliked by 
 the mobile at that time, and few cried, God 
 bless him ! Indeed, as the company moved 
 away, I heard a ragged fellow (who should 
 have been laid by the heels for it) cry, 
 *' There goes Starvation Jack, that fed his 
 soldiers on boiled bricks and baked mortar."
 
 106 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 "He is a Whig now," said my Grand- 
 mother to me, when I rejoined her; "but 
 he was of the bravest among men, and in 
 the old days loved the true King dearly." 
 
 When this man was young and poor, 
 the mobile used to call him "Handsome 
 Jack." When he was rich and old and 
 famous, he was " Starvation Jack " to them. 
 And of such are the caprices of a vain, 
 precipitate age. But I am glad I saw him, 
 Whig and pinchpenny as he was. I am 
 proud of having seen this Great Captain 
 and Prince of the Holy Eoman Empire. 
 The King of Prussia, the Duke of Cumber- 
 land, my Lord George Sackville, Marshal 
 Biron, Duke Eichelieu, and many of the 
 chiefest among the Turkish bashaws, have 
 I known and conversed with; but I still 
 feel til at Man's trembling hand on my head; 
 my blood is still fired, as at the sound of a 
 trumpet, by the remembrance of his voice ; 
 I still rejoice at my fortune in having set 
 eyes, if only for a moment, on John 
 Churchill, Duke of Marlborough.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 107 
 
 It was on tlie Twenty-nintli of January 
 (o.s.) that our servants, who had declared to 
 having heard the death-watch ticking for 
 days, asserted that those ominous sounds 
 grew faster and faster, resolving themselves 
 at length into those five distinct taps, with a 
 break between, which are foolishly held by 
 the vulgar to spell out the word death. And 
 although the noise came probably from some 
 harmless insect, or from a rat nibbling at 
 the wainscot, that sound never meets my 
 ear — and I have heard it on board ship 
 many a time, and in gaol, and in my tent 
 in the desert — without a lump of ice sliding 
 down my back. As for Ghosts, John 
 Dangerous has seen too many of them to be 
 frightened.* 
 
 That night I slept none. It was always 
 my lot in that huge house to be put, little 
 fellow as I was, in the hugest of places. 
 My bed was as spacious as a Turkish divan. 
 
 * Captain Dangerous was, luiconsciously, of the 
 same mind with Samuel Taylor Coleridge. — Ed.
 
 103 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Its yellow silken quilt, lined witli eider- 
 down, and embroidered with crimson flowers, 
 was like a great waving field of ripe corn 
 with poppies in it. When I lay down, 
 great weltering weaves of Bed came and 
 rolled over me ; and my bolster alone was 
 as big as the cook's hammock at sea, who 
 has always double bedding, being swollen 
 with other men's rations. This bed had 
 posts tall and thick enough to have been 
 Gerard the Giant's lancing-pole, that used 
 to stand in the midst of the bakehouse in 
 Basing Lane ; and its curtains of yellow 
 taffety hung in folds so thick that I always 
 used to think birds nestled anion :z them. 
 That night I dreamt that the bed was 
 changed into our great red pew at St. 
 George's, only that it was hung with dark 
 velvet instead of scarlet baize, and that the 
 clergyman in the pulpit overhead, with a 
 voice angrier than ever, was reading that 
 service for the martyrdom of K. C. I'^ which 
 I had heard so often. And then methought 
 my dream changed, and two Great Giants
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 109 
 
 with heading-axes came striding over the 
 bed, so that I could feel their heavy feet on 
 my breast ; but their heads were lost in the 
 black sky of the bed's canopy. Horror ! 
 they stooped down, and lo, the}^ were head- 
 less, and from their sheared shoulders and 
 their great hatchets dripped, dripped, for 
 ever dripped, great gouts of something hot 
 that came into my mouth and tasted salt 1 
 And I woke up with my hair all in a dabble 
 with the nightdews, with my Grandmother's 
 voice ringing in my ears, " Eemember the 
 Thirtieth of January !" Mercy on me ! I 
 had that dream again last night ; and the 
 Giants with their axes came striding over 
 these old bones — then they changed to a 
 headless Spaniard and a bleeding Nun ; but 
 the voice that cried, " Eemember !" spake 
 not in the English tongue, and was not my 
 Grandmother's. And the hair of my flesh 
 stood up, as Job's drd. 
 
 In the morning, when the clouds of night 
 broke up from the pale winter's sky, and 
 went trooping away like so many funeral
 
 110 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 coacli-liorses to their stable, they told me 
 that my Grandmother was Dead ; that she 
 had passed away when the first cock crew, 
 softly sighing " Eemember." It was a 
 dreadful thing for me that 1 could 
 not, for many hours, weep ; and that for 
 this lack of tears I was reproached for a 
 hardened ingrate by those who were now 
 to be my most cruel governors. Eut I could 
 not cry. The grief within me baked my 
 tears, and I could only stare all round at the 
 great desert of woe and solitude that seemed 
 to have suddenly grown up around me. 
 That morning, for the first time, I was left 
 to dress myself ; and when I crept down to 
 the parlour, I found no breakfast laid out 
 for me — no silver tankard of new milk with 
 a clove in it, no manchet of sweet diet 
 bread, no egg on a trencher in a little heap 
 of salt. I asked for my breakfast, and was 
 told, for a young cub, that I might get it 
 in the kitchen. It would have ffone hard 
 with me if, in my Grandmother's time, I had 
 entered that place to her knowledge; but
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. Ill 
 
 all things were changed to me now, and 
 when I entered the kitchen, the cook, nay, 
 the very scullion-wench, never moved for 
 me. John Footman sat on the dresser 
 drinking a mug of pnrl that one of the 
 maids had made for him. The cook leered 
 at me, while another saucy slut handed me 
 a great lump of dry bread, and a black-jack 
 with some dregs of the smallest beer at 
 the bottom. What had I done to merit 
 such uncivil treatment ? 
 
 By and by comes Mr. Cadwallader Avith 
 a sour face, and orders me to my chamber, 
 and get a chapter out of Deuteronomy by 
 heart by dinner-time, " Or you keep double 
 fast for Martyrdom-day, my young 
 master," he says, looking most evilly 
 at me. 
 
 "Young master, indeed," Mrs. Nancy 
 repeated ; " young master and be saved to 
 us. A parish brat rather. No man's child 
 but his that to hit you must throw a stone 
 over Bridewell Vf all. Up to your chamber, 
 little varlet, and learn thy chapter. There
 
 112 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 are to be no more counting of beads or 
 mumblinsrs over hallowed beans in this 
 house. Up with you ; times are changed." 
 
 AVhy should this woman have been my 
 foe? She had been a cockering, fawning 
 nurse to me not so many months ago. 
 Months! — yesterday. Why should the 
 steward, who was used to flatter and caress 
 me, now frown and threaten like some harsh 
 taskmaster of a Cliuk, where wantons are 
 sent to be whipped and beat hemp. I slunk 
 away scared and cowed, and tried to learn a 
 chapter out of Deuteronomy ; but the letters 
 all danced up and down before my eyes, and 
 the one word " Eemember," in great scarlet 
 characters, seemed stamped on ever}^ P^g^- 
 
 It should have been told that betw^een my 
 seventh and my eighth year I had been 
 sent, not only to church, but to school ; but 
 my grandmother deeming me too tender for 
 the besom discipline of a schoolmaster, — 
 from which even the Quality were not at 
 that time spared, — I was put under the 
 government of a discreet matron, who taught
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 113 
 
 not only reading and writing, but also 
 brocaded waistcoats for gentlemen, and was 
 great caudle-maker at christenings. It was 
 the merriest and gentlest school in the town. 
 We were some twenty little boys and girls 
 together, and all we did was to eat sweet- 
 meats, and listen to our dame while she told 
 us stories about Cock Eobin, Jack the Giant- 
 Killer, and the Golden Gardener. Now and 
 then, to be sure, some roguish boy would 
 put pepper in her snuff-box, or some saucy 
 girl hide her spe(?tacles ; but she never laid 
 hands on us, and called us her lambs, her 
 sweethearts, and the like endearing expres- 
 sions. She was the widow of an Irish 
 colonel who suffered in^he year '96, for his 
 share in Sir John Fenwick's conspiracy ; and 
 I think she had been at one time a tiring- 
 woman to my Grandmother, whom she held 
 in the utmost awe and reverence. I often 
 pass Mrs. Triplet's old school-house in what 
 is now called Major Foubert's Passage, and 
 recall the merry old days when 1 went to a 
 schoolmistress who could teach her scholars 
 VOL. I. I
 
 114 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 nothing but to love lier dearly. It was to 
 my Grandmother, a kind but strict woman, 
 to whom I owed what scant reading 
 and writing ken I had at eight .years of age. 
 
 Eudely and disdainfully treated as I now 
 was, my governors thought it fit, for the 
 world's sake, that I should be put into 
 decent mourning ; for my grandmother's 
 death could not be kept from the Quality, 
 and there was to be a grand funeral. She 
 lay in State in her great bedchamber ; 
 tapers in silver sconces all around her, an 
 Achievement of arms in a lozenge at her 
 head, the walls all hung with fine black 
 cloth edged with orris, and pieced with her 
 escocheon, properly lllazoned ; and she her- 
 self, white and sharp as waxwork in her face 
 and hands, arrayed in her black dress, witli 
 crimson ribbons and crimson scarf, and a 
 locket of gold on her breast. They would 
 not bury her with her rubies, but these, too, 
 were laid upon her bier, which was of black 
 velvet, and with a fair HoUand sheet 
 over all.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEUOUS. 115 
 
 'Not alone the chamber itself, but the 
 anterooms and staircase were hung from 
 cornice to skirting with black. The under- 
 taker's men were ever in the house : they 
 ate and drank whole mountains of beef and 
 bread, whole seas of ale and punch (thus to 
 qualify their voracity) in the servants' hall. 
 They say my Grandmother's funeral cost a 
 thousand pounds, which Cadwallader and 
 Mrs. Talmash would really have grudged, 
 but that it was the will of the executors, 
 who were persons of condition, and more 
 powerful than a steward and a waiting- 
 woman. In her own testament my Grrand- 
 mother said nothing about the ordering of 
 her obsequies ; but her executors took upon 
 them to provide her with such rites as 
 beseemed her degree. In those days the 
 Quality were very rich in their deaths ; and, 
 for my parb, I dissent from the starveling 
 and nipcheese performances of modern 
 funerals. It is most true that a hole in 
 the sand, or a coral-reef, full fathom live, 
 has been at many times my likeliest Grave ; 
 I 2
 
 116 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 but I have left it nevertheless in my Will — 
 which let those who come after me dispute 
 if they dare — that I may he buried as a 
 Gentleman of long descent, with all due 
 Blacks, and Plumes, and Lights, and a sup- 
 per for my friends, and mourning cloaks for 
 six poor men. 
 
 Wliy the doctors should have remained 
 in the house jangling and glozing in the 
 very lobby of Death, and eating of cold meats 
 and drinking of sweet wine in the parlour, 
 after the breath was out of the body of their 
 patient and patroness, it passes me to say ; 
 as well should a player tarry upon the Stage 
 long after the epilogue has been spoken, the 
 curtain lowered, and the lights all put out. 
 Yet were Pall Mall and Warwick Lane 
 faithful, not onl}^ unto the death, but beyond 
 it, to Hanover Square. A coachful of these 
 grave gentlemen were bidden to the burial, 
 although it was probable that words woukl 
 run so hio-h amono: tliem as for wii^'s to be 
 tossed out of the windows. And although 
 it is but ill fighting and base fence to draw
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 117 
 
 upon a foe in a coach, I think (so bitter are 
 our Physicians against one another) that 
 they would make but little ado in breaking 
 their blades in halves and stabbing at one 
 another crosswise as they sat, with their 
 handkerchiefs for hilts. 
 
 It was on the eighth night after her 
 demise, and at half- past nine of the clock, 
 that my Grandmother was Buried. I was 
 dressed early in the afternoon in a suit of 
 black, full trimmed, falling bands of white 
 cambric, edged, and a little mourning sword 
 with a crape knot, and slings of black velvet. 
 Then Mrs. Talmash knotted round my neck 
 a mourning-cloak that was about eight 
 times too large for me, and with no gentle 
 hand flattened on my head a hat bordered 
 by heavy sable plumes. On the left shoulder 
 of my cloak there was embroidered in gold 
 and coloured silks a little escocheon of 
 arms ; and with this, in my child-like way, 
 my fingers hankered to play; but with 
 threats that to me were dreadful, and not 
 without sundry nips and pinches, and sly
 
 118 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 clouts, I was bidden to be still, and stir 
 not from a certain stool apportioned to me 
 in the great Witlidrawing-room. Xot on 
 this side of the tomb shall. I forget the 
 weary, dreary sense of desolation that came 
 over me when, thus equipped, or rather 
 swaddled and hampered in garments strange 
 to me, and of which I scarcely knew the 
 meaning, I was left alone for many hours 
 in a dismal room, whose ancient splendour 
 was novv^ all under the eclipse wrought by 
 the undertakers. And 1 pray that few 
 children may so cruelly and suddenly have 
 their happiness taken away from them, and 
 from pampered darlings become all at once 
 despised and friendless outcasts. 
 
 By and by the house began to fill A\ith 
 company ; and one that was acting as 
 Groom of the Chambers, and marshalling 
 the guests to their places, I heard whisper 
 to the Harbinger, who first called out the 
 names at the Stair-head, that Clarencieux 
 king-at-arms (who was then wont to attend 
 the funerals of the Qualit}', and to be gra-
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 119 
 
 tified with heavy fees for his office ; although 
 in our days 'tis only public noblemen, ge- 
 nerals, ambassadors, and the like, who are 
 so honoured at their interment, only un- 
 dertaker's pageantry being permitted to the 
 private sort) — that Clarencieux himself 
 might have attended to marshal the follow- 
 ing, and proclaim the Style of the Departed ; 
 but that it was ordered by authority that, 
 as in her life her name and honours had 
 been kept secret, so likewise in her death 
 she was to remain an Unknown Lady. 
 How such a reticence was found to jump 
 with the dictates of the law, which required 
 a registry of all dead persons in the parish- 
 books, I know not ; but in that time there 
 were many things suffered to the Grreat 
 which to the meaner kind would have been 
 sternly denied; and, indeed, I have since 
 heard tell that sufferance even went beyond 
 the concealment of her Name, and that she 
 was not even buried in woollen, — a thing 
 then very strictly insisted upon, in order to 
 encourage the staple manufactures of Lan-
 
 120 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 cashire and the JSToi-tli, — and that, eitlier by 
 a Faculty from the Arches Court, or a 
 winking and conniving of Authority, she 
 was placed in her coffin in the same garb 
 in which she had lain in state. Of such 
 sorry mocks and sneers as to the velvet of 
 her funeral coffer being nearer Purple than 
 Crimson in its hue, and of my mourning 
 clojik being edged with a narrow strip of a 
 Violet tinge, — as though to hint in some 
 wise that my Grrandmother was foregathered, 
 either by descent or by marital alliance, with 
 Eoyalt}^, — I take little account. 'Tis not 
 every one who is sprung from the loins of a 
 King who cares to publish the particulars of 
 his lineage, and John Dangerous may per- 
 chance be one of such discreet men. 
 
 The doctors had been so long in the house 
 that their names and their faces were familiar 
 to me, not indeed as friends, but as that 
 kind of acquaintance one may see every day 
 for twenty years, and be not very grieved 
 some morning if news comes that they are 
 dead. Such an eye-acquaintance passes my
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 121 
 
 windows every morning. I know liis face, 
 his form, his hat and coat, the very tie of 
 his wig and tlie fashion of his shoe-buckle ; 
 but he is no more to me than I am haply 
 to him, and there would be scant weeping, 
 I opine, between us if either of us were to 
 die. So I knew these doctors and regarded 
 them little, wondering only why they ate 
 and drank so much, and could so ill conceal 
 their hatred as to be calling foul names, 
 and well-nigh threatening fisticuffs, while 
 the corse of my Grandmother was in the 
 house. But of the body of those who 
 were bidden to this sad ceremony, I had 
 no knowledge whatsoever. For aught I 
 knew, they might have been players or 
 bullies and Piccadilly captains, or mere 
 undertaker's men dressed up in fine clothes ; 
 yet, believe me, it is no foolish pride, or a 
 dead vanity, that prompts me to surmise 
 that there w^ere tlrose who came to my 
 Grandmother's funeral who had a Claim to 
 be reckoned amongst the very noblest and 
 proudest in the land. Beneath the great
 
 122 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 mourning cloaks and scarves, I could see 
 diamond stars glistening, and the brave 
 sheen of green and crimson ribbons. I 
 desire in this particularity to confine my- 
 self strictly to the Truth, and therefore 
 make no vain boast of a Blue Eibbon beinj? 
 seen there, thus denoting the presence of a 
 Knight of the most noble Order of the 
 Garter. I leave it to mine enemies to lie, 
 and to cowardly Jacks to boast of their own 
 exploits. This brave gathering was not 
 void of women ; but they were closely veiled 
 and impenetrably shrouded in their mourn- 
 ing weeds, so that of their faces and their 
 figures I am not qualified to speak ; and if 
 you would ask me that which I remember 
 chiefly of the noble gentlemen who were 
 present, I can say with conscience, that 
 beyond their stars and ribbons, I was only 
 stricken by their monstrous and portentous 
 Periwigs, which towered in the candle-light 
 like so many great tufts of plumage atop of 
 the Pope's Baldaquin, which I have seen so
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 128 
 
 many times staggering tlirougli tlie great 
 aisles of St. Peter's at Rome. 
 
 Your humble servant, and truly liumble 
 and forlorn lie v/as that night, was placed at 
 the coffin's head ; it being part of that black 
 night's sport to hold me as chief mourner ; 
 and, indeed, poor wretch, I had much to 
 mourn for. The great plumed hat they had 
 put upon me flapped and swaled over my 
 eyes so as almost to blind me. My foot 
 was for ever catching in my great mourn- 
 ing cloak, and I on the verge of tripping 
 myself up; and there was a hot smoke 
 sweltering from the tapers, and a dreadful 
 smell of new black cloth and sawdust and 
 beeswax, that was like to have suffocated 
 me. Infinite was the relief when two of 
 the ladies attired in black, who had sat on 
 either side of me, as though to guard me 
 from running away, lifted me gently each 
 under an armpit, and held me up so that I 
 could see the writing on the coffin-plate, 
 which was of embossed silver and very 
 brave to view.
 
 124 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 " Can you read it out, my little man ?'* a 
 deep ricli voice as of a lady sounded in mine 
 ears. 
 
 I said, witli mucli trembling, " that I 
 thought I could spell out the words, if time 
 and patience were accorded me." 
 
 " There is little need, child," the voice 
 resumed. " I will read it to thee ;" and a 
 black-gloved hand came from beneath her 
 robe, and she took my hand, and holding 
 my forefinger not ungently made me trace 
 the writing on the silver. But I declare 
 that I can remember little of that Legend 
 now, although I am impressed with the 
 belief that my kinswoman's married name 
 was not mentioned. That it was merely 
 
 set forth that she was the Lad}' D , 
 
 whose maiden name was A. G., and that 
 she died in London in the 90th vcar of 
 her aofe, Kine: Georcfe I. beincr kin2: of 
 England. And then the smoke of the 
 tapers, the smell of the cloth and the wax, 
 and the remembrance of my Desolation, 
 were too much for me, and I broke out
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 125 
 
 into a loud Avail, unci was so carried fainting 
 from the room ; being speedily, however, 
 sufficiently recovered to take my place in 
 the coach that was to bear us Eastward. 
 
 AVe rode in sorrowful solemnity till nigh 
 three o'clock that morning ; but v/here my 
 Grandmother was buried I never knew. 
 Erom some odd hints that I afterwards 
 treasured up, it seems to me that the 
 coaches parted company with the Hearse 
 somewhere on the road to Harwich; but 
 of this, as I have averred, I have no certain 
 knowledge. In sheer fatigue I fell asleep, 
 and woke in broad daylight in the great 
 state-bed at Hanover Square.
 
 126 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 CHAPTEE THE FIFTH. 
 
 I AM BARBAROUSLY ABUSED BY THOSE WHO HAVE 
 
 CHARGE OF ME, AND FLYING INTO CHARLWOOD 
 
 CHASE, JOIN THE "BLACKS." 
 
 In the morning, the wicked people into 
 whose power I was now delivered, came 
 and dragged me from my bed with fierce 
 thumps, and giving me coarse and rude 
 apparel, forced me to dress myself like a 
 beggar boy. I had a wretched little frock 
 and breeches of grey frieze, ribbed woollen 
 hose and clouted slioes, and a cap that was 
 fitter for a chimney-sweep than a young 
 gentleman of quality. I was to go away 
 in the Wagon, they told me, forthwith to 
 School ; for my Grandmother — if I was 
 indeed any body's Grandson — liad left me 
 nothing, not even a name. Henceforth, I
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 127 
 
 was to be little Scrub, little Eagamuffin, 
 little boy Jack. All the unknown Lady's 
 propert}^ they said, was left to Charities 
 and to deserving Servants. There was not 
 a penny for me, not even to pay for my 
 schooling; but, in Christian merc}^ Mrs. 
 Talmash was about to have me taught some 
 things suitable for my new degree, and in 
 due time have me apprenticed to some rough 
 Trade, in which I might haply — if I were 
 not hanged, as she hinted pretty plainly, 
 and more than once — earn an honest liveli- 
 hood. Meanwhile I was to be taken away 
 in the Wagon, as though I were a Malefactor 
 going in a Cart to Tyburn. 
 
 I was taken down -stairs, arrayed in my 
 new garments of poverty and disgrace, and 
 drank in a last long look at my dear and 
 old and splendid Home. How little did I 
 think that I should ever come to look upon 
 it again, and that it would be my own 
 House — mine, a prosperous and honoured 
 old man ! The undertaker's men were 
 busied in taking down the rich hangings.
 
 128 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 and guzzling and gorging, as was their 
 wont, on what fragments remained of the 
 Danquetings and carousals of Death, which 
 had lasted for eight whole days. All 
 wretched as I was, I should — so easily are 
 the griefs of childhood assuaged by cates and 
 dainties — have been grateful for the wing of 
 a chicken or a glass of Canary : but this was 
 not to be. John a'Nokes or John a'Styles 
 were now more considered than I was, and 
 I was jDushed and bandied about by fustian 
 knaves and base mechanics, and made to 
 wait for full half an hour in the hall, as 
 though I had been the by-blow of a Eun- 
 ning Footman promoted into carrying of a 
 link. 
 
 'Twas Dick the Groom that took me to 
 the Wagon. Many a time he had walked 
 by the side of my little pony, trotting up 
 the Oxford Eoad. He was a gross un- 
 lettered churl, but not unkind ; and I think 
 remembered with something like compunc- 
 tion the many pieces of silver he had had 
 from his Little Master.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 129 
 
 '' It's mortal hard," lie said, as he took 
 my hand, and began lugging me along, 
 " that your grandam should have died 
 and left you nothing. 'Tis all clear as 
 Bexley ale in a yard -glass. Lawyers ha' 
 heen reading the will to the gentlefolks, 
 and there's nothing for thee, poor 
 castaway." 
 
 I began to cry, not because my Grand- 
 mother had disinherited me, but because 
 this common horse-lout called me a " cast- 
 away," and because I knew myself to^ 
 be one. 
 
 "Don't fret," the groom continued ; 
 " there'll be greet enough for thee when 
 thou'rt older ; for thou'lt have a hard 
 time on't, or my name's not Dick 
 Snaffle." 
 
 We had a long way to reach the AVagon, 
 which started from a Tavern called the 
 "Pillars of Hercules," right on the other 
 side of Hyde Park. I was desperately 
 tired when we came thither, and craved 
 leave to sit on a bench before the door, be- 
 
 VOL. T. K
 
 130 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 tween the Sign-post and the Horse -trough. 
 So low was I fallen. A beggar came along- 
 side of me, and as I dozed tried to pick my 
 pocket. There was nothing in it — not even 
 a crust ; and he hit me a savage blow over 
 the mouth because I had nothing to be 
 robbed of. Anon comes Dick Snaffle, who, 
 telling me that the Saddler of Eawtrj' was 
 hanged for leaving his liquor, and that he 
 had no mind for a halter while good ale was 
 to be drunk, had been comforting himself 
 within the tavern; and he finding me all 
 blubbered with grief at the blow I had 
 gotten from the beggar, fetches him a sound 
 kick; and so the two fell to fighting, till 
 out comes the tapster, raving at Tom 
 Ostler to duck the cutpurse cadger in 
 the Horse-trough. There was much more 
 sport out of doors in my young days 
 than now. 
 
 At last the Wagon, for wliich we had 
 another c^ood hour to wait, came lumberins: 
 up to the Pillars of Hercules ; and after the 
 Wagoner had fought with a Grenadier, who
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 131 
 
 wanted to go to Brentford for fourpence, 
 and would have stabbed the man witli his 
 bayonet had not his hand been stayed, 
 the Grroom took me up, and put me on 
 the straw inside. He paid the Wagoner 
 some money for me, and also gave into his 
 keeping a little bundle, containing, I sup- 
 pose, some change of raiment for me, saying 
 that more would be sent after me when 
 needed ; and so, handing him too a letter, he 
 bade me Godd'en, and went on his way with 
 the Grenadier, a Sweep, and a Gipsy woman, 
 who was importunate that he should cross 
 her hand with silver, in order that he might 
 know all about the great Fortune that 
 he was to wed, as Tom Philbrick did in 
 the ballad. And this was the way in which 
 the Servants of the Quality spent their 
 forenoons when I was young. 
 
 As the great rumbling chariot creaked 
 away westward, there came across my child- 
 heart a kind of consciousness that I had 
 been "Wronged, and Cheated out of my in- 
 heritance. Why was I all clad in laces and
 
 132 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 velvet but yesterday, and to-day apparelled 
 like a tramping pedlar's foster-brat ? Why 
 was I, who was used to ride in coaches, and 
 on ponyback, and on the shoulder of my own 
 body- servant, and was called "Little Mas- 
 ter," and made much of, to be carted away 
 in a vile dray like this ? But what is a child 
 of eight years old to do ? and how is he to 
 make head against those who are older and 
 wickeder than he ? I knew nothins: about 
 lawyers, or wills, or the Eogueries of domes- 
 tics. I only knew that I had been foully 
 and shamefully Abused since my dear 
 Grandparent's death ; and in that wagon, I 
 think, as I lay tumbling and sobbing on 
 that straw, ^vere first planted in me those 
 seeds of a Wild, and sometimes Savage, dis- 
 position that have not made my name to be 
 called. " Dangerous" in vain. 
 
 We were a small and not a ver}' merry 
 company under the Avagon tilt. There was 
 a Tinker, Avitli all his accoutrements of pots 
 and kettles about him, who was lazy, as 
 most Tinkers are when not at hard work.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 133 
 
 and lay on liis back chewing straw, and 
 cursing me fiercely whenever I moved. 
 There was a Welsh gentleman, very ragged 
 and dirty, \vith a wife raggeder and dirtier 
 than he. He was addressed as Captain, and 
 was bound, he said, for Bristol, to raise 
 soldiers for the King's Service. He beat 
 his wife now and then, before we came to 
 Hounslow. There was the tinker's dog, a 
 great terror to me ; for although he feigned 
 to sleep, and to snore as much as a Dog can 
 snore, he always kept one little red eye fixed 
 upon me, and gave a growl and made a Snap 
 whenever I turned on the straw. There 
 was the Wagoner's child that was sickly, 
 and continually cried for its mammy ; and 
 lastly there was a buxom servant-maid, with 
 a little straw hat and cherry ribbons over a 
 Luton lace mob, and a pretty flowered gown 
 pulled through the placket-holes, and a 
 quilted petticoat, and silver buckles in her 
 shoes, and black mits, who was going home 
 to see her Grandmother at Stoke Pogis, — so 
 she told me, and made me bitterly remem-
 
 134 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 ber that I had now no Grandmother, — and 
 was as clean and bright and smiling as a 
 new pin, or the milkmaids on May morning 
 dancing round the brave Garlands that they 
 have gotten from the silversmiths in Cran- 
 bourn Alley. She sat prettily crouched up 
 on her box in a corner ; and so, with the 
 Tinker among his pots and kettles, the 
 Welsh Captain and his lady on sundry 
 bundles of rags, the sickly cliild in a basket, 
 the Tinker's dog curled up in his Master's hat, 
 T tossing on the straw, and a great rout of 
 crates of crockery, rolls of cloth, tea and 
 sugar, and other London merchandize, which 
 the wagoner was taking down West, as a 
 return cargo for the eggs, poultry, butcher's 
 meat, and green stuff that he had brought up, 
 made altogether such a higgledypiggledy that 
 you do not often see in these days, when Ser- 
 vant-maids come up by Coach — my service to 
 them ! — and disdain the Wagon, and his 
 Worship the Captain wears a line laced coat 
 and a cockade in his hat, — who but he I — 
 and travels post.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 135 
 
 The maid who was bound on a visit to 
 her Grrandmother was, I rejoice to admit, 
 most tenderly kind to me. She combed my 
 hair, and wiped away the tears that besmirched 
 my face. When the Wagon halted at the 
 King's Arms, Kensington, she tripped down 
 and brought me a flagon of new milk with 
 some peppermint in it; and she told me 
 stories all the way to Hounslow, and bade 
 me mind my book, and be a good child, and 
 that Angels would love me. Likewise that 
 she was being courted by a Pewterer in 
 Panyer Alley, who had parted a bright six- 
 pence with her — she showed me her token, 
 drawn from her modest bodice, and who had 
 passed his word to Wed, if he had to take to 
 the Eoad for the price of the Ring — ^but that 
 was only his funning, she said, — or if she 
 were forced even to run away from her Mis- 
 tress, and make a Fleet Match of it. It 
 was little, in good sooth, that I knew about 
 courtships or Love-tokens or Fleet Matches ; 
 but I believe that a woman, for want of a 
 better gossip, would open her Love-budget
 
 I'K) Tin-: STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 to a Baby or a Blind Puppy, and I listened 
 so well that slie kissed me ere we parted, 
 and gave me a pocketful of cheese-cakes. 
 
 It was quite night, and far beyond 
 Hoiinslow, when I was dozing off into happy 
 sleep again, that the AYagon came to a dead 
 stop, and I awoke in great fright at the 
 sound of a harsh voice askinsr if the Bov 
 Jack was there. I was the '' Boy Jack ;" 
 and the Wagoner, coming to the after-part 
 of the tilt with his lantern, pulled me from 
 anion 2: the straw with far less ado than if 
 I had been the Tinker's dog. 
 
 I was set down on the ground before a 
 tall man with a long face and an ugly little 
 scratch wig, who had large boots with straps 
 over his thighs like a Farmer, and swayed 
 about him with a long whip. 
 
 '' Oh, this is the boy, is it?" said the long 
 man. "A rare lump to lick into shape, 
 upon my word." 
 
 I was too frightened to say aught ; but 
 the Wagoner muttered something in the 
 long man's ear, and gave him my ].)undle
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 137 
 
 and money and the letter ; and then I was 
 clajDped up on a pillion behind the long' 
 man, who had clomb up to the saddle of a 
 vicious horse that went sideways ; and he, 
 bidding me hold on tight to liis belt, for a 
 mangy young whelp as I was, began jolting 
 me to the dreadful place of Torture and In- 
 fernal cruelty which for six intolerable 
 months was to be my home. 
 
 This man's name was Grnawbit, and he 
 was my Schoolmaster. I was delivered over 
 to him, bound hand and foot, as it were, by 
 those hard- hearted folk (who should liave 
 been most tender to me, a desolate orphan) 
 in Hanover Square. His name was G^naw- 
 bit, and he lived hard by West Drayton. 
 
 We are told in Grood Books about the 
 Devil and his Angels ; but sure I think that 
 the Devil must come to earth sometimes, 
 and marry and have children : whence the 
 Grnawbit race. I don't believe that the man 
 had one Spark of Human Feeling in him. 
 I don't believe that any tale of Man or 
 Woman's Woe would ever have wruns: one
 
 138 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 tear from tliat cold eye, or drawn a pang 
 from that hard heart. I beheve that he 
 was a perfectly senseless, pitiless Brute and 
 Eeast, suffered, for some unknown purpose, 
 to dwell here above, instead of being ever- 
 lastingly kept down below, for the purpose 
 of Tormenting. I was always a Dangerous, 
 but I was never a Ee vengeful man. I have 
 given mine enemy to eat when he was a- 
 hungered, and to drink when he was athirst. 
 I have returned Good for Evil very many 
 times in this Troubled Life of mine, ex- 
 posed as it has been always to the very 
 sorest of temptations ; but I honestly aver, 
 that were I to meet this Tyrant of mine, 
 now, on a solitary island, I would mash his 
 Hands with a Club oi' with my Feet, if lie 
 strove to grub up roots ; that were I Alone 
 with him, wrecked, in a shallop, and there 
 were one Keg of Fresh Water between us, 
 I would stave it, and let the Stream of Life 
 waste itself in the gunwales while I held 
 his head down into the Sea, and forced him 
 to swallow the brine that should drive him
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 139 
 
 Eaving Mad. But tliis is uncliristian, and 
 I must go consult Doctor Dubiety. 
 
 riesli and Blood ! Have you never 
 tliouglit upon the Wrongs your Pedagogue 
 has wrought upon you, and longed to meet 
 that Wretch, and wheal his flesh with the 
 same instrument with which he whealed 
 you, and make the Ruffian howl for mercy ? 
 Mercy, quotha ! did he ever show you any ? 
 A pretty equal match it was, surely ! You 
 a poor, weak starveling of a child shivering 
 in your shoes, and ill-nurtured by the coarse 
 food he gave you, and he a great, hulking, 
 muscular villain, tall and long-limbed, and 
 all-powerful in his wretched Empire ; while 
 you were so ignorant as not to know that 
 the Law, were he discovered (but who was 
 to denounce him ?), might trounce liim for 
 his barbarity. Ah ! brother Gnawbit, if I 
 had ever caught you on board a good ship 
 of mine ! Aha ! knave, if John Dangerous 
 would not have dubbed himself the slieerest 
 of asses, had he not made your back 
 acquainted with nine good tails of three-
 
 140 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 strand cord, with triple knots in each, and 
 the brine-tub afterwards. I will find out 
 this Gnawbit yet, and cudgel him to the 
 death. But, alas, I rave. He must have 
 been full five-and- forty -years old when I 
 first knew him, and that is nigh sixty years 
 agone. And at a hundred and five the 
 cruellest Tyrant is past cudgelling. 
 
 This man had one of the prettiest houses 
 that was to be seen in the prettiest part of 
 England. The place was all draped in ivy, 
 and roses, and eglantine, with a blooming 
 flower-garden in front, and a luscious orchard 
 behind. He had a wife too who was Fair 
 to see, — a mild little woman, with blue 
 eyes, who used to sit in a corner of her 
 parlour, and shudder as she heard the boys 
 shrieking in the schoolroom. There was an 
 old infirm Gentleman that lodu^ed with 
 them, that had been a Captain under the 
 renowned Sir Cloudesley Shovel and Admiral 
 E/Ussell, and could even, so it was said, 
 remember, as a sea -boy, the Dutch being in 
 the Medway, in King Charles's time. This
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEllOUS. 141 
 
 Old Gentleman seemed the only person that 
 Gnawbit was afraid of. He never interfered 
 to dissuade him from liis brutalities, nay, 
 seemed rather to encouras^e him therein, 
 crying out as the sounds of torture reached 
 him, " Bear it ! bear it ! Good again 1 
 Make 'em holloa ! Make 'em dance ! Cross 
 the cuts ! Dig it in ! Eub in the brine 1 
 Oho ! Eear it, brave boys ; there's nothing 
 like it !" Yet was there something jeering 
 and sarcastic in his voice that made Gnawbit 
 prefer to torture his unhappy scholars when 
 the Old Gentleman was asleep, — and even 
 then he vfould sometimes wake up and cry 
 out, " Bear it 1 ' from the attic, or when he 
 was being wheeled about the neighbourhood 
 in a sick man's chair. 
 
 The first morning I saw the Old Gentle- 
 man he shook his crutch at me, and cried, 
 " Aha ! another of 'em ! Another morsel 
 for Gnawbit. More- meat for his market. 
 Is he plump? is he tender? Will he bear 
 it ? Will he dance ? Oho ! King Solomon 
 for ever." And then he burst into such a
 
 142 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 lit of wheezing laugliter that ]\Irs. Gnawbit 
 had to come and pat him on the back and 
 bring him cordials ; and my Master, looking 
 very discomposed, sternly bade me betake 
 myself to the schoolroom. 
 
 After that, the Old Gentleman never saw 
 me without shakinor his crutch and asking: 
 me if I liked it, if I could bear it, and if 
 Gnawbit made my flesh quiver. Of a truth 
 he did. 
 
 Why should I record the sickening ex- 
 perience of six months' daily suflering. That 
 I was beaten every day was to be expected 
 in an Age when blows and stripes were the 
 only means thought of for instilling know- 
 ledge into the minds of youth. But I was 
 alone, I was friendless, I was poor. My 
 master received, I have reason to believe, 
 but a slender Stipend with me, and he 
 balanced accounts by using me with greater 
 barbarity than he employed towards his 
 better paying scholars. I had no Surname, 
 I was only " Boy Jack ;" and my school- 
 fellows put me down, I fancy, as some base-
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 143 
 
 l3orn child, and accordingly despised me. I 
 had no pocket-money. I was not allowed 
 to share in the school-games. I was bidden 
 to stand aside when a cake was to be cut up. 
 God help me ! I was the most forlorn of 
 little children. Mrs. Grnawbit was as kind 
 to me as she dared be, but she never showed 
 me the slightest favour without its bringing 
 me (if her husband came to hear of it) an 
 additionally cruel Punishment. 
 
 There was a Pond behind the orchard 
 called Tibb's hole, because, as our schoolboy 
 legend ran, a boy called Tibb had once cast 
 himself thereinto, and was drowned, through 
 dread of being tortured by this Monster. 
 I grew to be very fond of standing alone by 
 the bank of this Pond, and of looking at 
 my pale face in its cool blue-black depth. 
 It seemed to me that the Pond was my 
 friend, and that within its bosom I should 
 find rest. 
 
 I was musing in this manner by the bank 
 one day when I felt myself touched on the 
 shoulder. It was the crutch of the Old
 
 144 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Gentleman, who had been wheeled hither, 
 as was his custom, Ly one of the boys. 
 
 " You q:o into the orchard and steal a 
 juicy pear," said the Old Gentleman to his 
 attendant. " Gnawbit's out, and I wont 
 tell him. Leave me with Boy Jack for five 
 minutes, and then come back. — Boy Jack," 
 he continued, when w^e were alone, " how do 
 you like it ?" 
 
 " Like what, sir ?" I asked humbly. 
 
 " All of it, to be sure : — the birch, the 
 cane, the thong, the ferula, the rope's-end, — 
 all Gnawbit's little toys ?" 
 
 I told him, weeping, that I vras very, 
 very unhappy, and that I would like to 
 drown myself. 
 
 " That's wrong, that's wicked," observed 
 the Old Gentleman with a chuckle ; " you 
 mustn't drovvii yourself, because then 
 you'd lose your chance of being hanged. 
 Gregory has as much right to live as other 
 folks."- 
 
 In my youth ancient persons as frequently spoke
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 145 
 
 I did not in the least understand what 
 he meant, but went on sobbhig. 
 
 " I tell you what it is," pursued the Old 
 Gentleman ; " you mustn't stop here, be- 
 cause Gnawbit will skin you alive if you 
 do. He's bound to do it ; he's sworn to 
 do it. Pie half-skinned Tibb ; and was 
 going to take off the other half, when 
 Tibb drowned himself like a fool in this 
 hole here. He was a fool, and should have 
 followed my advice and run away. ' Tibb,' 
 I said, 'you'll be skinned. Bear it, but 
 run away. Here's a guinea. Eun !' He 
 was afraid that Gnawbit would catch him ; 
 and where is he now? Skinned, and 
 drowned into the bargain. Don't you be 
 a Fool. You Eun while there's some skin 
 left. Gnawbit's sworn to have it all, if 
 you don't. Here's a guinea, and run away 
 as fast as ever your legs can carry you." 
 
 He gave me a bright piece of gold and 
 
 of the hangman as " Gregory " — and he was so named 
 at the trial of the Kegicides in 16G0-G1 — as by his 
 later title of "Jack Ketch."— J. D. 
 
 VOL. 1
 
 146 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 waved me off, as tliougli I were to run 
 away that very moment. I submissively 
 said that I w^ould run away after school 
 wTcS over, but asked him where I should 
 run to. 
 
 '' I'm sure I don't know," the Old Gentle- 
 man said somewhat peevishly. "That's 
 not my business. A boy that has got legs 
 with skin on 'em, and doesn't know where 
 to run to, is a jackass. — Stop !" he con- 
 tinued, as if a bright idea had just struck 
 him ; " did you ever hear of the Blacks?" 
 
 " No sir," I answered. 
 
 "Stupid oaf! Do you know where 
 Charlwood Chase is ?" 
 
 " Yes, sir ; my schoolfellows have been 
 nutting there, and I have heard them 
 speak of it." 
 
 " Then you make the best of your way 
 to Charlwood Chase, and go a-nutting there 
 till you find the Blacks ; you can't miss 
 them; they're everywhere. Eun, 3'ou 
 little Imp. See ! the time's up, and here 
 comes the boy who stole the juicy pear."
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 147 
 
 And the boy coming up, muncliing tlie 
 remains of one of Gnawbit's juiciest pears, 
 my patron was wheeled away, and I have 
 never seen him from that day to this. 
 
 That very night I ran away from Gnaw- 
 bit's, and made my way towards Charlwood 
 Chase to join the " Blacks,'' although who 
 those "Blacks" were, and whereabouts in 
 the Chase they lived, and what they did 
 when they were there, I had no more defi- 
 nite idea than who the Emperor Prester 
 John or the Man in the Moon might be. 
 
 l2
 
 148 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 CHAPTER THE SIXTH. 
 
 THE HISTORY OF MY GRANDFATHER, WHO WAS SO LONG 
 
 KEPT A PRISONER IN ONE OF THE KING's 
 
 CASTLES IN THE EAST COUNTRY. 
 
 At the time when his Majest}' Charles IT. 
 was so happily restored to the throne of 
 these kingdoms, there was, and had been, 
 confined for upwards of ten years, in one 
 of his Majesty's Castles in the eastern part 
 of this kingdom, a certain Prisoner. His 
 Name was known to none, not even to 
 the guards who kept watch over him, so to 
 speak, night and day, — not even to tlie 
 gaoler, who had been told that he must 
 answer with his Head for his safe custod}-, 
 who had him always in a spying, fretful 
 overlooking, and who slept every night 
 with the keys of the Captive's cell under
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 149 
 
 his pillow. The Castle where he lay in 
 hokl has been Ions: since levelled to the 
 earth, if, indeed, it ever had any earth to 
 rest upon, and was not rather stayed upon 
 some jutting fragment of Eock washed 
 away at last by the ever-encroaching sea. 
 Nay, of its exact situation I am not 
 qualified to tell. I never saw the place, 
 and my knowledge of it is confined to a 
 bald hearsay, albeit of the Deeds that were 
 done within its walls I can afiirm the cer- 
 titude with Truth. From such shadowy 
 accounts as I have collected, the edifice 
 would seem to have consisted but of a 
 single tower or donjon-keep very strong 
 and thick, and defying the lashings of the 
 waves, almost as though it were some 
 Pharos or other guide to mariners. It was 
 surrounded by a low stone wall of pro- 
 digious weight of masonry, and was ap- 
 proached from the mainland by a draw- 
 bridge and barbican. But for many months 
 of the year there was no mainland within 
 half a mile of it, and the King's Castle
 
 150 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 could only be readied by boats. Men said 
 that tlie Sun never shone there but for ten 
 minutes before and ten minutes after a 
 storm, and there were almost always storms 
 lowering over or departing from that dismal 
 place. The Castle was at least two miles 
 from any human habitation ; for the few 
 fishermen's cabins, made of rotten boats, 
 hogsheads nailed together, and the like, 
 which had pitifully nestled under the lee 
 of the Castle in old time, had been 
 rigorously demolished to their last crazy 
 timber when the Prisoner was brought 
 there. At a respectful distance only, far 
 in, and yet but a damp little islet in the 
 midst of the fens, was permitted to linger 
 ^on, in despised obscurity, a poor swamp of 
 some twenty houses that might, half in 
 derision and half in civility, be called a 
 Village. It had a church witliout a steeple, 
 but with a poor Stump like the blunted 
 wreck of some tall ship's mainmast. The 
 priest's wages were less than those of a 
 London coal-porter. The poor man could
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 151 
 
 get no titlies, for there were no tithes to 
 give him. Three parts of his glebe were 
 always under water, and he was forced to 
 keep a little school for his maintenance, 
 of which the scholars could pay him but 
 scant fees, seeing that it was alwa3^s a 
 chance whether their parents were dead of 
 the Ague, or Drowned. Yet there was a 
 tavern in the village, where these poor, 
 shrinking, feverish creatures met and drank 
 and smoked, and sang their songs, con- 
 triving now and again to smuggle a few 
 kegs of spirits from Holland, and baffle the 
 riding- officers in a scamper through the 
 fens. They were a simple folk, - fond of 
 telling Ghost-Stories, and with a firm belief 
 in charms to cure them from the Ague. 
 And, with an awe whose intensity was re- 
 newed each time the tale was told, they 
 whispered among themselves as to that 
 Prisoner of Fate up at the Castle yonder. 
 What this man's Crime had been, none 
 could tell. His misdeed was not, it was 
 whispered, stated in the King's ' Warrant.
 
 152 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 The Governor was simply told to receive a 
 certain Prisoner, who would he delivered to 
 him by a certain Officer, and that, at the 
 peril of his life, he was to answer for hi^ 
 safe custodjr. The Governor, whose name 
 was Ferdinando Glover, had been a Captain 
 of Horse in the late Protector Oliver's time ; 
 but, to the surprise of all men, he vras not 
 dismissed at his Majesty's Eestoration, but 
 was continued in his command, and indeed,, 
 received preferment, having the grade of a 
 Colonel on the Irish establishment. But 
 they did not fail to tell him, and with fresh 
 instances of severity, that he would answer 
 with his head for the safe keeping of his 
 Prisoner. 
 
 Of this strange Person it behoves me now 
 to speak. In the year 16G0, he appeared to 
 be about seven -and-thirty years of age, tall, 
 shapely, well-knit in his limbs, which cap- 
 tivity had rather tended to make full of 
 flesh than to waste away ; for there were no 
 yards, nor spacious outlying walls to this- 
 Gastlc ; and but for a narrow leds^e that ran
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 153 
 
 along the surrounding border, and wliere lie 
 was but rarely suffered to walk, tliere was no 
 means for liim to take any exercise what- 
 ever. He wore his own hair in full dark 
 locks, which Time and Sorrow had alike 
 agreed to grizzle. Strong lines marked his 
 face, but age had not brought them there. 
 His eye was dim, but more with watching 
 and study than with the natural failing of 
 vital forces. 
 
 So he had been in this grim place going 
 on for twelve years, without a day's respite, 
 without an hour's enlargement. True, he 
 wore no fetters, and was treated with a 
 grave and stately Consideration ; but his 
 bonds were not less galling, and the iron 
 had not the less entered into his soul. The 
 Order was, that he was to be held as a 
 Gentleman, and to be subjected to no gro- 
 velling indignities or base usage. But the 
 Order was (for a long time, and until an- 
 other Prisoner, hereafter to be named, 
 received a meed of Enlargement) likewise 
 as strict that, save his keepers, he should
 
 154 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 see no living soul. " And it is useless," 
 wrote a Great Lord to the Governor once, 
 when it Avas humbly submitted to him 
 that the Prisoner might need spiritual 
 consolation, and have solace to his soul 
 by conferring with poor Parson Webfoot 
 yonder, — "it is useless," said that noble- 
 man, "for your charge to see any black 
 gown, under pretext that he would Repent ; 
 for, albeit though I know not his crime 
 more than the babe unborn, I have it from 
 his Majesty's own gracious word of mouth, 
 that what he has done cannot be repented 
 of; therefore you are again commanded to 
 keep him close, and to let him have speech 
 neither of parson nor of peasant." Which 
 was duly done. But Colonel Glover, not 
 untouched by that curiosity inherent to 
 mankind, as well as womankind, took pains 
 to cast about whether this was not one who 
 had a hand in compassing the death of 
 King Charles I. ; and this coming, in some 
 strange manner (through inquiries he had 
 made in London), to the ears of Authority,
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 155 
 
 lie was distinctly told that liis prisoner was 
 not one of those bold bad men wlio, misled 
 by Oliver Cromwell, had signed that fatal 
 Warrant : — the names and doom of the 
 Eegicides being now all well known, as 
 having suffered or fled from Justice, or 
 being in hold, as Mr. Martyn was. So 
 Colonel Glover, being well assured that 
 what was done was for the King's honour, 
 and for the well-being of his Estates, and 
 that any other further searching or prying 
 might cost him his place, if they did not 
 draw him within the mxcshes of the laAv 
 against Misprision of Treason, forbore to 
 vex himself or Authority further on matters 
 that concerned him not, and was so content 
 to guard his Prisoner with greater care than 
 ever. The Castle was garrisoned by but 
 twelve men, and of these six were invalids 
 and matrosses ; but the other six were tall 
 and sturdy veterans^ who had been indeed 
 of Oliver's Life-guard, and were now con- 
 firmed in their places, and with the pay, 
 not of common soldiers, but of private
 
 loC THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 gentlemen, by the King's own order. Their 
 life was dreary enough, for they could hold 
 but little comradeship witli the invalids, 
 whom they dubbed " greybeards, drivellers, 
 and kill-joys." But they had a guard-room 
 to themselves, where they diced and drank, 
 and told their ruffian stories, and sang their 
 knavish catches, as is the manner, I sup- 
 pose, for all soldiers to do in all countries, 
 whether in camps or in cities. But their 
 duty was withal of the severest. The 
 invalids went snugly to bed at nine of the 
 clock, or thereabouts, but the veritable men- 
 of-war kept watch and ward all night, turn 
 and turn about, and even when they slept 
 took their repose on a bench, which was 
 placed right across the Prisoner's door. 
 
 This much-enduring man — for surely no 
 lot could be harder than his — to be thus, 
 and in the very prime and vigour of man- 
 hood, cooped up in a worse than gaol, 
 wdierein for a long time lie was even denied 
 the company of captives as wretched as he, 
 — this slave to some j\Iightier AVill and
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 157 
 
 Sterner Fate than, it would seem, mortal 
 knowledge could wot of, bore his great 
 Distress with an unvarying meekness and 
 calm dignity. With him, indeed, they did 
 as they listed, using him as one that was 
 as Clay in the hands of the Potter ; but, 
 not to the extent of one tetchy word or 
 froward movement, did he ever show that 
 he thought his imprisonment unjust, or the 
 bearing of those who were set over him 
 cruel. And this was not an abject stupor 
 or dull indifference, such as I have marked 
 in rogues confined for life in the Bagnios of 
 the Levant, who knew that they must needs 
 pull so many strokes and get so many stripes 
 every day, and so gave up battling with the 
 World, and grinned contumely at their 
 gaolers or the visitors who came sometimes 
 to point at them and fling them copper 
 money. In the King's Prisoner there was 
 a philosophic reserve and quietness that 
 almost approached content ; and his resig- 
 nation under suffering: was of that kind 
 that' a Just Man may feel who knows
 
 158 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 that lie is upon tlie ground, and that, how- 
 soever his enemies pusli at him, he cannot 
 fall far. He never sought to evade the 
 conditions of his captivity or to plead for 
 its being lightened. The courtesies that 
 were offered to him, in so far as the Go- 
 vernor was warranted in offering such civi- 
 lities, he took as his due ; but he never 
 craved a greater indulgence or went one 
 step in word or in deed to obtain a surcease 
 from his harsh and ctuel lot. 
 
 He would rise at six of the clock both in 
 winter and summer, and apply himself with 
 great ardour to his private devotions and 
 to good studies until eight, when his break- 
 fast, a tankard of furmety and a small 
 measure of wine, was brought him. And 
 from nine until noon he would again be at 
 his studies, and then have dinner of such 
 meats as were in season. From one to three 
 he was privileged to walk either on the nar- 
 row strip of masonry that encompassed his 
 prison-house, and with a soldier with his 
 firelock on hip following his every step, or
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 159 
 
 else to wander up and down in tlie various 
 chambers of tlie Castle, still followed by a 
 guard. Now lie would tany awliile in tlie 
 guard-room, and stand over against the 
 soldier's table, his head resting very sadly 
 against the chimney, and listen to their wild 
 talk, which was, hovv^ever, somewhat hushed 
 and shaped to decency so long as he abided 
 there. And anon he would come into the 
 Governor's apartment, and hold Colonel 
 Glover for some momeifts in grave discourse 
 on matters of history, and the lives of 
 Worthy Captains, and sometimes upon 
 points and passages of Scripture, but never 
 upon anything tha.t concerned the present 
 day. For, beyond the bounds of the place in 
 which he was immured, what should he know 
 of things of instant moment, or of the way 
 the world was wagging ? By permission, the 
 Colonel had told him that Oliver was no 
 more, and that Richard, his son, was made 
 Protector in his stead. Then, at the close 
 of that weak and vain shadow of a Eeign, 
 and after the politic act of my Lord Duke of
 
 IGO THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Albemarle (Gen. Monk), who made his own 
 and the country's fortune, and Kan Clarges'* 
 to boot, at one stroke, the Prisoner was 
 given to know that schism was at an end, 
 and that the King had come to his own 
 again. Colonel Glover must needs tell him ; 
 for he Avas bidden to fire a salvo from the 
 five pieces of artillery he had mounted, three 
 on his outer wall, and two at the top of his 
 donjon-keep, to say nothing of hoisting the 
 Eoyal Standard, whiuli now streamed from 
 the pole where erst had floated the rag 
 that bore the arms of the Commonwealth of 
 England.! 
 
 "I am glad," the Prisoner said, when 
 they told him. " I hope this young man 
 will make England happier than did his 
 
 * A woman of very mean belongings, v/l:ose parents 
 lived, I have heard, somewh.ere about the Maypole in 
 the Strand, and who was promoted to high station, 
 being Monk's Duchess, but to her death of a coai-se and 
 brutish carriage, and shamefully given to the drinking 
 of strong waters. — J. D. 
 
 t A very glorious rag nevertheless. — Ed.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 161 
 
 father before liim." But this was after he 
 was in hopes of getting some company in 
 his solitude, and when he was cheerfuller. 
 
 It was about midway in his imprisonment 
 when another Captive was brought to the 
 King's Castle ; but it was not until close 
 upon the Eestoration of King Charles II. 
 that the two prisoners were permitted to 
 come together. The second guest in this 
 most dolorous place was a Woman, and that 
 Woman was my Grrandmother, Arabella 
 Greenville. 
 
 There is no use in disguising the fact 
 that, for many months after the failure of 
 her attack on the Protector, the poor Lady 
 had been as entirely distraught as was her 
 fate after the death of the Lord Francis, and 
 that to write her Life during this period 
 would be merely penning the chronicle of a 
 continued Frenzy. It were merciful to 
 draw a veil over so- sad and mortifying a 
 scene — so well brought up as she had been, 
 and respected by all the Quality, — but in 
 pursuit of the determination with which I 
 
 VOL. I. M
 
 162 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 set out, to tell tlie Truth, and all the Truth, 
 I am forced to confess that my Grandmo- 
 ther's Eavings were of the most violent, and 
 that of her thoroughly demented state there 
 could he no douht. So far, indeed, did the 
 unhappy creature's Abandonment extend, 
 that those who were about her could with 
 difficulty persuade her to keep any Garments 
 upon her body, and were forced with Stripes 
 and Eevilings to force to a decorous carriage 
 the gentle Lady who had once been the very 
 soul and mirror of Modesty. But in pro- 
 cess of fime these dreadful furies and rages 
 left her, and she became cahn. She was 
 still beautiful, albeit her comeliness was 
 now of a chastened and saddened order, and, 
 save her eye, there was no light or sparine 
 in her face. 
 
 When her health and mind were healed, 
 so far as earthly skill could heal them, — it 
 being given out, I am told, to her kindred 
 that she had died mad in the Spinning- 
 House at Cambridge : but she had never 
 been further than the house of one Dr Emp-
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 163 
 
 son at Colchester, who had tended her dur- 
 ing her distraction, — my Grandmother was 
 brought to the King's Castle in the East, 
 and for a long time lay incarcerate in a 
 lower chamber of the Keep, being not allowed 
 even that scant exercise which was permitted 
 to the Prisoner above, and being waited 
 upon and watched night and day by the 
 Governor's Daughter, Mistress Ruth Glover, 
 who at nights slept in a little closet adjoin- 
 ing my Grandmother's chamber. The girl 
 had a tongue, I suppose, like the rest of her 
 sex, — and of our sex too, brother, — and she 
 would not have been eighteen, of a lively 
 Disposition, and continually in the society 
 of a Lady of Birth and accomplishments, 
 not more than ten years her senior, with- 
 out gossiping to her concerning all that 
 she knew of the sorry little world round 
 about her. It was not, however, much, or 
 of any great moment; that Ruth had to tell 
 my Grandmother. She could but hold her 
 in discourse of how the Invalid Matrosscs 
 had the rheumatism and the ague ; how tlie 
 M 2
 
 164 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Life-guard men in tlieir room diced and 
 drank and quarrelled, botli over their dice 
 and their drink ; how the rumour ran that 
 the poverty-stricken habitants of the adjoin- 
 ing village had, from long dwelling among 
 the fens, become as web-footed as the wild- 
 fowl they hunted ; and how her Father, who 
 had been for many years a widower, was 
 harsh and stern with her, and would not 
 suffer her to read the romances and play- 
 books, some half-dozen of which the Ser- 
 geant of the Guard had with him. Slie 
 may have had a little also to say about the 
 Prisoner in the upper story of the Keep — 
 how his chamber was all filled with folios 
 and papers ; how he studied and wrote and 
 prayed; and during his two hours' daily 
 liberty wandered sadly and in a silent man- 
 ner about the Castle. For this was all 
 Mistress Euth had to tell, and of the Pri« 
 soner*s name, or of his Crime, slie was,, 
 perforce, mum. 
 
 These two Women nevertheless shaped 
 all kinds of feverish Eomances and wild con-
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 165 
 
 jectures respecting this unknown man above 
 stairs. Arabella had told her own sad story 
 to the girl who — though little better than a 
 waiting- worn an — she had made, for want of 
 n better bower-maiden, her Confidante. I 
 need not say that oceans of Sympathy, or 
 the accepted Tokens thereof, I mean Tears, 
 ran out from the eyes of the Governor's 
 Daughter when she heard the History of 
 the Lord Francis, of the words he spoke 
 just before the musketeers fired their pieces 
 at him, and of another noble speech he 
 made two hours before he Suffered, when 
 the Officer in command, compassionating 
 his youth and parts, told him that if he 
 had any suit, short of life, to prefer to 
 the Lord General, he would take upon 
 himself to say that it should be granted 
 witliout question ; whereon quoth my Lord 
 Prancis, " I will not die with any suit in 
 my mouth, save to the King of kings." 
 On this, and on the story of the Locket, 
 and of his first becoming acquainted witli 
 Arabella, of his sprightly disguise as a
 
 106 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Teacher, with the young squire at ^radam 
 Desaguilier's school at Hackney, of his 
 Beauty and Virtues and fine manners and 
 extraordinary proficiency in Arts and Letters 
 and the Exercises of Chivalry, — of these and 
 a thousand kindred things the two w^omen 
 w^ere never tired of talking. And, indeed, 
 if one calls to mind what vast Eloquence 
 and wealth of words two loving hearts can 
 distil from a Bit of Eibhon or a Torn Letter, 
 it is not to be wondered at that Arabella 
 and Euth should find their Theme inex- 
 haustible — so good and brave as had been 
 its Object, now dead and cold in the bloody 
 trench at Hampton yonder, and convert it 
 into a perpetually welling spring of Mournful 
 Eemembrances. 
 
 Arabella had taken to her old trick of 
 Painting again, and in the first and second 
 year of her removal to the Castle executed 
 some very creditable performances. But 
 she never attempted either the effigies of 
 her Lover or of the Protector, and confined 
 herself to portraitures of the late martyred
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 167 
 
 Xing, and of the Princes now unjustly kept 
 from their inheritance. 
 
 It was during the Protectorate of Eichard 
 Cromwell (that mere puppet-play of Power) 
 that the watch kept on the prisoners in the 
 King's Castle grew for a time much less 
 severe and even lax. Arabella was suffered 
 to go out of her chamber, even at the very 
 hours that the Prisoner above was wander- 
 ing to and fro. The guards did not hinder 
 their meeting ; and, says Colonel Ferdinando 
 Glover, one day to his daughter, " I should 
 not wonder if, some of these days, Orders 
 were to come down for me to set both my 
 birds free from their cage. That which Mrs. 
 Greenville has done, you and I know full 
 well, and I am almost sorry that she did 
 not succeed." 
 
 " Oh, father !" cries Mistress Euth, who 
 was of a very soft and tender nature, and 
 abhorred the very idea of bloodshed ; so 
 that, loving Arabella as she did with all 
 her heart, she could not help regarding 
 her with a kind of Terror when she re-
 
 1G8 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 membered the deed for wliicli she wiis 
 confined. 
 
 " Tusli, girl," the Colonel makes answer, 
 " 'tis no Treason now to name such a 
 thmg. Oliver's dead, and will eat no more 
 bread ; and I misliked him much at the end, 
 for it is certain that he betrayed the Good 
 Old Cause, and hankered after an earthly 
 crown. As for this 3^oung Popinjay, he 
 will have more need to protect himself than 
 these Kingdoms. And I think that if your 
 father is to live on the Kino-'s wacres, it had 
 better be on the real Kings's than the false 
 one. 
 
 "And do you think, father, that King 
 Charles will come to his own asrain?" asks 
 Euth, in a flutter of delight ; for Arabella 
 had made her a very Eoyalist at heart. 
 
 "I think what I think," replies the Colonel, 
 with his stern look ; " but whatever happens, 
 it is not likely, it seems me, that we shall 
 have our prisoners here much longer. That 
 is to say: — Mrs. Greenville, for what she 
 hath done can scarcely be distasteful to
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 1G9 
 
 those who loved not Oliver. But for my 
 other hird, — who can tell ? He may 
 have raised the very Devil for aught I 
 know." 
 
 " Do you think that he also tried to kill 
 the Protector?" Euth asks timidly, and just 
 hazarding a Surmise that had oft been 
 mooted betwixt Arabella and herself. 
 
 " G-et thee to thy chamber, and about thy 
 business, wench," the Colonel says, quite 
 storming. " Away, or I will lay my willow 
 wand about thy shoulders. Is there nothing 
 but killing of Protectors, forsooth, for thy 
 silly head to be filled with ?" And yet I 
 incline to think that Mr. Governor was not 
 of a very different mind to his daughter ; 
 for away he hies to his chamber, and falls 
 to reading Colonel Titus' famous book. 
 Killing no Murder^ and, looking anon on his 
 Prisoner coming wandering down a winding 
 staircase, says softly to himself, " He looks 
 like one, for all his studious guise, who 
 could do a Bold Deed at a pinch." 
 
 This Person, I should have said, w^ore.
 
 170 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 winter and summer, a plain black shag gown 
 nntrimmed, with camlet netherstocks, and a 
 smooth band. And his Eight Hand was 
 always covered with a glove of Black 
 Velvet. 
 
 By and by came, as I have related, the 
 news of his Majesty's Eestoration and fresh 
 Strict Orders for the keeping of the Prisoner. 
 But though he was not to see a clergyman, 
 — and for all that prohibition he saw more 
 than one before he came out of Captivity, — 
 a certain Indulgence was now granted him. 
 He was permitted to have free access to 
 Mrs. Arabella Grreenville, and to converse 
 freely with her at all proper times and 
 seasons. 
 
 But that I know the very noble nature of 
 my Grandmother, and am j)repared, old as 
 I am, to defend her fame even to taking 
 the heart's blood of the villain that ma- 
 ligned her, I might blush at having to 
 record a fact which must needs be set down 
 here. Ere six months had passed, there 
 grew up between Mrs. Greenville and the
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 171 
 
 Prisoner a very warm and close friendsliip, 
 whicli in time ripened into the tenderest of 
 attachments. Tbat her love for her dear 
 Frank ever wavered, or that she ever swerved 
 for one moment in her reverence for his 
 memory, I cannot and I will not believe ; 
 but she nevertheless looked with an exceed- 
 ing favour upon the imprisoned man, and 
 made no scruple of avowing her Flame to 
 Euth. This young person did in time 
 confide the same to her father, who was 
 much concerned thereat, he not knowing 
 how far the allowance of any love-passages 
 between two such strangely assorted suitors 
 might tally with his duty towards the King 
 and Government. Nor could he shut his 
 eyes to the fact that the Prisoner regarded 
 Mrs. Greenville first with a tender compassion 
 (such as a father might have towards his 
 child), next with an ardent sympathy, and 
 finally — and that very speedily too — with a 
 Peeling that had all the Signs and Portents 
 of Love. These two unfortunate People 
 were so shut out from the world, and so
 
 172 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 spiritually wedded by a common Miser}^ and 
 discomfort, that their mere earthly coming 
 together could not be looked upon but as 
 natural and reasonable ; for Mrs. Green^dlle 
 was the only woman upon whom the Pri- 
 soner could be expected to look, — he being, 
 beyond doubt, one of Gentle Degree, if not 
 of Great and ISToble Station, and therefore 
 beyond aught but the caresses of a Patron 
 with such a simple maid as Euth Glover, 
 whose father, although of some military 
 rank, was, like most of the Captains who 
 had served under the Commonwealth (wit- 
 ness Ireton, Harrison, Hacker, and many 
 more) of exceeding mean extraction. 
 
 That love-vows were interchanged between 
 this Bride and Bridesrroom of Sorrow and a 
 Dark Dungeon almost, I know not ; l)ut 
 their liking for each other's society — he 
 imparting to her some of his studies, and 
 she playing music, with implements of which 
 she was well provided, to him of an after- 
 noon — had become so apparent both to the 
 soldiers on guard and servants, even to the
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 173 
 
 poor Invalid Matrosses wheezing and shiver- 
 ing in their bufF-coats, that Colonel Glover, 
 in a very flurry of uncertainty, sent post 
 haste to Whitehall to know what he was to- 
 do — whether to chamber up Mrs. Greenville 
 in her chamber, as of aforetime, or confine 
 the Prisoner in one of the lower vaults in 
 the body of the rock, with so many pounds 
 weight of iron on his legs. For Colonel 
 Glover was a man accustomed to use strong 
 measures, whether with his family or with 
 those he had custody over. 
 
 No answer came for many days ; and the 
 sf Governor had almost begun to think his 
 message to be forgotten, when one summer 
 evening (a.d. 1661) a troop of horse were 
 seen galloping from the Village towards the 
 Castle. The Drawbridge, which was on the 
 ordinary kept slung, was now lowered ; and 
 the captain of the troop passing up to the 
 barbican, gave Colonel Glover a sealed 
 packet, and told him that he and his men 
 would bivack at the bridge-foot (for the fens 
 were passable at this season) until one who
 
 174 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 was expected at nightfall should come. 
 Meat and drink were sent for, and the 
 soldiers, dismounting, began to take tobacco 
 and rail against the Castle in their brutal 
 fashion — shame on them ! — as an old mangy 
 rat-trajD. 
 
 Colonel Glover went up into his chamber 
 in extreme disturbance. He had opened 
 the packet and conned its contents; and 
 having his daughter to him presently, and 
 charging her, by her filial duty, to use 
 discretion in all things that he should 
 confide to her, tells her that his ]\Iajesty 
 the King of England, France, and Ireland * 
 was coming to the Castle in a strictly Dis- 
 guised habit that very evening. 
 
 There was barely time to make Ihe 
 slightest of preparations for this Glorious 
 Guest; but what there was, and of the best 
 of Meat, and Wine, and Plate, and liang- 
 ings, and candles in sconces, was set out in 
 the Governor's chamber, and ordered as 
 handsomely as might be for his Majesty's 
 coming. ^ About eight o'clock — the villagers
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 175 
 
 being given to understand that only some 
 noble commander is coming to pass the 
 soldiers in the Castle in review — arrived two 
 lackeys, with panniers and saddle-bags, and 
 a French varlet, who said he was, forsooth, 
 a cook, and carried about with him a whole 
 elaboratory of stove-furnaces, pots and pans, 
 and jars of sauces and condiments. Monsieur 
 was quickly at work in the kitchen, turning 
 all things topsy-turvy, and nearly frighten- 
 ing Margery, the old cook, who had been a 
 baggage- wagon sutler at Naseby in the 
 Great Wars, into fits. About half-past ten 
 a trumpet was heard to wind at the bridge- 
 foot, and a couple of horses came tramping 
 over the planks, making the chains rattle 
 even to the barbican, where their riders 
 dismounted. 
 
 The King, for it is useless to make any 
 further disguise about him — although the 
 Governor deferred falling on his knees and 
 kissing his hand until he had conducted him 
 to his own chamber — was habited in strict 
 incognito, with an uncurled wig, a flap-hat,
 
 170 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 and a liorseman's coat over all. He liad 
 not so mucli as a hanger by his side, carry- 
 ing only a stout oak walking-staff. AVitli 
 him came a great lord, of an impudent 
 countenance, and with a rich dress beneath 
 his cloak, who, when his Master was out of 
 the room, sometimes joked v/ith, and some- 
 times swore at, poor little Buth, as, I grieve 
 to say, was the uncivil custom among the 
 Quality in those wild days. The King 
 supped very copiously, drinking many 
 beakers of wine, and singing French songs, 
 to which the impudent Lord beat time, and 
 sometimes presumed to join in chorus. But 
 this Prince was ever of an easy manner and 
 affable complexion, which so well explains 
 the Love his people bore him. All this 
 while the Governor and Eutli waited at 
 table, serving the dishes and wine on their 
 knees; for they would suffer no mean 
 hirelings to wait upon their guests. 
 
 As the King drank — and he was a great 
 taker of wine — he asked a nmltitude of 
 questions concerning the Prisoner and Mrs.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 177 
 
 Greenville, to all of wliicli Colonel Glover 
 made answer in as plain a manner as was 
 consistent with his deep loyalty and rever- 
 ence. Soon, however. Colonel Glover found 
 that his Majesty was paying far more 
 attention to the bottle than to his con- 
 versation, and, about one in the morning, 
 was condacted, with much reverence, to the 
 Governor's own sleeping-chamber, which 
 had been hastily prepared. His Majesty 
 was quite Affable, but Haggard visibly. 
 The impudent Lord was bestowed in tlie 
 chamber which had been Euth's, before 
 she came to sleep so near Mrs. Greenville ; 
 and it is well he knew not what a pretty 
 tenant the room had had, else would he 
 have doubtless passed some villanous plea- 
 santries thereupon. 
 
 The King, who was always an early riser, 
 was up betimes in the morning ; and on 
 Colonel Glover representing to him his sor- 
 row for the mean manner in which he had 
 of necessity been lodged, answered airily 
 that he was better off there than in the Oak, 
 
 VOL. I. N
 
 178 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 or in Holland, without a stjr^er in his pocket; 
 " Although, oddsfish !" quoth his Majesty, 
 "this Castle of mine seems fitter to harbour 
 wild-ducks than Christians." And then 
 nothing would suit his Majesty but to be 
 introduced to Mrs. Greenville, with whom 
 he was closeted two whole hours. 
 
 He came forth from her chamber with his 
 dark, saturnine face all flushed. " A brave 
 woman ! — a bold woman !" he kept saying. 
 " An awful service she was like to have 
 done me ; and all to think that it was for 
 love of poor Frank." For this Prince had 
 known the Lord Francis well, and had 
 shown him many favours. 
 
 " And now, good Master Governor," the 
 King continued, but with quite another ex- 
 pression on his countenance, " we will see 
 your Man Captive, if it shall so please you." 
 And the two went upstairs. 
 
 This is all I am permitted to tell in this 
 place of what passed between King Charles 
 the Second and the Prisoner in the upper 
 chamber : —
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 179 
 
 " You know me !" the King said, sitting 
 over against him at the table, and scanning 
 his face with dark earnestness. 
 
 " You are Charles Stuart, second of the 
 name on the throne of England." 
 
 "You know I am in the possession of 
 your secret — of the King's Secret; for of 
 those dead it was known but to Oliver, as 
 of those living it is now only known to 
 yourself and to me." 
 
 "And the young Man, Richard?" 
 
 " He never knew it. His father never 
 trusted him so far. He had doubts and 
 suspicions, that was all." 
 
 " Thank God !" said the prisoner. 
 
 " What was Oliver's enmity towards 
 you, that he should immure you here all 
 these years ?" 
 
 " I had served him too well. He feared 
 lest the Shedder of Blood should become 
 the Avenger of Blood." 
 
 " Are you sorry ?" 
 
 " Sorry !" cried the Prisoner, with a kind 
 of scream. " Had he a thousand lives, had 
 • N 2
 
 180 THF STRANGE ADVENTURES OP 
 
 I a thousand hands, I would do the same 
 deed to-morrow." And he struck the right 
 hand that was covered with the velvet 
 glove with cruel violence on to the oaken 
 table.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 181 
 
 CHAPTEE THE SEVENTH. 
 
 I AM BRED UP IN VERY BAD COMPANY, AND (tO MY 
 
 shame) help to kill the king's deer. 
 
 I LAY all that night in a little Hole by the 
 side of a Bank, just as though I had been 
 a Fox-cub. I was not in much better case 
 than that Vermin, and I only marvel that m}^ 
 Schoohnaster did not come out next day to 
 Hunt me with horses and hounds. Hounds ! 
 — the Black Fever to him ! — he had used me 
 like a Hound any time for Six Months 
 past ; and often had I given tongue under his 
 Double Thonging. Happily the weather 
 was warm, and I got no hurt by sleeping in 
 the Hole. 'Tis strange, too, what Hardships 
 and Hazards of Climate and Excess we can 
 bear in our Youth, whereas in middle life an
 
 182 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 extra Slice gives its a Surfeit, and another 
 cup turns our Liver to Touchwood ; wliilst 
 in age (as I know to my sorrow) we dare 
 scarcely venture our shoe in a Puddle for 
 fear of the Chills and Sciatica. In the 
 morning I laved m}^ face in a Brook that 
 hurtled hard by ; but waited very fearfully 
 until Noon ere I dared venture forth from 
 my covert. I had filled my pockets with 
 Fruit and Bread (which I am afraid I did 
 not come very honestly by, and indeed 
 admit that Gnawbit's Larder and Orchard 
 found me in Provender), and was so able to 
 break my fast. And my Guinea, I remem- 
 bered, was still unchanged. I had a dim 
 kind of impression that I was bound to 
 Charlwood Chase, to join the Blacks of 
 whom the Old Gentleman had spoken, but 
 I was not in any Hurry to get to my Goal. 
 I was Free, albeit a Runaway, and felt all 
 the delights of Independence. You whose 
 pleasures lie in Bowers, and Beds, and Cards, 
 and Wine, can little judge of the Ease felt 
 by liim who is indeed a Beggar and pursued,
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 1S3 
 
 but is at Liberty. I remember being in 
 biding once with a Gentleman Eobber, who 
 had, by the aid of a File and a Friend, con- 
 trived to give the Galleys leg-bail, and who 
 for days afterwards was never tired of patting 
 and smoothing his ankles, and saying, 
 " 'Twas there the shackles galled me so." 
 Poor rogue ! he was soon afterwards laid by 
 the heels and swung ; for there is no Neck 
 Verse in France to save a Gentleman from 
 the Gallows. 
 
 Towards evening my gall began to grate 
 somewhat with the sense of mine own utter 
 loneliness ; and for a moment I Wavered 
 between the resolve to go Forward, and a 
 slavish prompting to return to my Tyrant, 
 and suffer all the torments his cruelty could 
 visit me with. Then, as a middle course, I 
 thought I would creep back to my kennel 
 and die there ; but I was happily dissuaded 
 from such a mean surrender to Fortune's 
 Spites through the all-unknowing agency of 
 a Bull, that, spying me from afar off where 
 he was feeding, came thundering across two
 
 184 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 fields and through a shallow stream, routed 
 me up from my refuge, and chased me into 
 the open. I have often since been thankful 
 to this ungovernable Beast (that would have 
 Tossed, and perchance Grored me sorely, had 
 he got at me), and seldom, in later life, 
 when I have felt weak and wavering in the 
 pursuit of a profitable purpose, have I failed 
 to remember the Bull, and how he chased 
 me out of Distempered Idleness into 
 Activity. 
 
 The Sun had begun to welk in the west 
 by the time I had mustered up enough 
 courage to come into the High Eoad, which 
 I had an uncertain idea stretched away from 
 Gnawbit's house, and towards Eeading. But 
 suddenly recalling the Danger of travelling 
 by the Highway, where I might be met by 
 Horsemen or Labouring persons sent in 
 quest of me,— for it did not enter my mind 
 that I Avas too worthless a scholar to be 
 Pursued, and that Gnawbit was, 'tis likely 
 enough, more Pleased than sorry to be Bid 
 of me, — I branched ofi' from the main to the
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 185 
 
 left ; so walking, as it seemed to me, many 
 miles, I grew grievously hungry. jSTo more 
 Bread or Apples remained in my poucli ; 
 but I still had my Guinea, so I deemed, and 
 resolved that if I came upon any House of 
 Entertainment, I would sup. For indeed, 
 while all Nature round me seemed to he 
 taking some kind of Sustenance, it was hard 
 that I, a Christian, should go to bed (or into 
 another Fox-hole, for bed I had none, and 
 yet had slept in my time in a grand chamber 
 in Hanover Square) with an empty bell}^ 
 The Earth was beginning to drink up the 
 dews, like an insatiate toper as she is. I 
 passed a flock of sheep biting their hasty 
 supper from the grass ; and each one with a 
 little cloud of gnats buzzing around it, that 
 witli feeble stings, poor insects, were trying 
 for their supper too. And 'tis effect we have 
 upon another. The birds had taken home 
 their worm-cheer to the little ones in the 
 nests, and were singing their after- supper 
 songs, very sweetly but drowsily. 'Twas 
 too late in the year for the Nightingale, —
 
 186 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 that J knew, — but the jolly Blackbird was 
 in full feather and voice ; and presently there 
 swept by me a great Owl, going home to 
 feast, I will be bound, in his hollow tree, 
 and with nothing less than a Field Mouse for 
 his supper, the rascal. 'Twas a wicked 
 imagining, but I could not help thinking, as 
 I heard the birds carolling so merrily, — and 
 how they keep so plump upon so little to eat 
 is always to me a marvel, until I remember 
 with what loving care Heaven daily spreads 
 their table from Nature's infinite ordinary, 
 — how choice a Eefection a dish of birds' 
 eggs, so often idly stolen and blown hollow 
 by us boys, would make. The feathered 
 creatures are a forgiving folk ; and 'tis not 
 unlikely that the Children in the Wood had 
 often gone birds'-nesting : but when they 
 were dead, the kindly Eed Jerkins forgave all 
 their little maraudings, and covered them 
 with leaves, as though the children had 
 strewn tliem crumbs or brought them worms 
 from January to December. Gnawbit was a 
 wretch who used to kill the Eobins, and for
 
 f 
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 187 
 
 that, if for naught else, he will surely 
 howl. 
 
 By and by, when darkness was coming 
 down like a playhouse curtain, and the 
 Northern wagoner up yonder — how often 
 have I watched him at sea ! — was yoking 
 his seven cart-mares to the steadfast star, I 
 came upon a Man — the first I had seen since 
 the Old Gentleman bade me begone with 
 my Gruinea, and join the Blacks. This 
 Man was not walking or running, nay nor 
 sitting nor lying as Lazars do in hedges. 
 But he tumbled out of the quicket as it 
 were, and came to me with short leaps, 
 making as though he would Devour me. 
 We schoolboys had talked often enough 
 about Claude Duval and the Golden Farmer, 
 and I set this Dreadful Being down at once 
 as a Highwayman ; so down I went Plump 
 on my knees and Eoared for mercy, as I 
 was wont to do to Gnawbit, till I learnt 
 that no Eoaring would make him desist 
 from his brutish purpose. It was darkish 
 now, and I welhnigh fancied the Man was
 
 f 
 
 188 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 indeed my wicked Master, for he Lad an 
 uplifted weapon in his hand; but when he 
 came nearer to me, I found that it was not 
 a cane nor a thong, but a Great Flail, which 
 he whirled over his head, and then brought 
 down on the ground with a Thwack, making 
 the Night Flies dance. 
 
 "You Imp of mischief," said the man, 
 as he seized me by the collar and shook me 
 roughly, " what are you doing here, spying 
 on honest folks? Speak, or I'll brain you 
 with this Flail." 
 
 I thouerht it best to tell this terrible man 
 the Truth. 
 
 " If you please, sir," I answered, trem- 
 bling, " I've run away." 
 
 " Eun away from where, you egg'^" 
 
 " From Gnawbit's, sir." 
 
 "And who the pest is Gnawbit, you 
 hempen babe ?" 
 
 " My schoolmaster, sir." 
 
 " Ha ! that's good," the Man replied, 
 loosening his hold somewhat on my collar. 
 "And what did you run away for?"
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 189 
 
 I told liim in broken sentences my sliort 
 Story — of my Sufferings at School, at least, 
 but never saying a vjord about my being a 
 little Gentleman, and the son of a Ladv of 
 Quality in Hanover Square. 
 
 " And where are you going?" the Man 
 asked, when I had finished. 
 
 I told him that I was on my way to 
 Charlwood Chase to join the Blacks. And 
 then he asked me whether I had any Money, 
 whereto I answered that I had a Guinea ; 
 and little doubting in my Quaking Heart 
 but that he would presently Wrench it from 
 me, if haply he were not minded to have 
 Meal as well as Malt, and brain me as he 
 had threatened. But he forbore to offer 
 me violence, and, quite releasing his hold, 
 said — 
 
 " I suppose you'd like some supper." 
 
 I said that I had not broken my fast for 
 many hours, and was dead a-hungered. 
 
 " And wouldn't mind supping with the 
 Blacks in Charlwood Chase, eh ?" he con- 
 tinued.
 
 190 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 I ratlier gave liim to understand that 
 such was not only my Wish but my Am- 
 bition. 
 
 " Come along to the Blacks, then," said 
 the Man. " Vm one of em!' 
 
 He drew a Lantern from under his gar- 
 ments as he spoke, and letting out the 
 Light from the slide, passed it over, and up 
 and down, his Face and Figure. Then did 
 I see with Horror and Amazement that 
 both his Countenance and his Eaiment were 
 all smirched and bewrayed with dabs and 
 patches of what seemed soot or blackened 
 grease. It was a once white Smock or 
 Gaberdine that made the chief part of his 
 apparel; and this, with the black jDatches 
 on it, gave him a Pied appearance fearful to 
 behold. There was on his head wliat looked 
 like a great bundle of black rags ; and tufts 
 of hair that might have been pulled out of 
 the mane of a wild horse grew out from 
 either side of his flice, and wreathed its 
 lower half. 
 
 " Come along," repeated the Man ; " we'll
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 191 
 
 blacken you bravely in time my Chicken- 
 skin." 
 
 And so lie grasped my band in bis, — and 
 wben I came to look at it afterwards, I 
 found it smeared witb sable, and with great 
 black finger-marks upon it, — and led me 
 away. We journeyed on in the Dark — for 
 be bad put up bis Lantern — for anotber 
 good balf-bour, be singing to bimself from 
 time to time some boarse catcbes of sono- 
 baving reference to some " Billy Boys '^ 
 tbat I conjectured were bis companions. 
 And so we struck from by-lane into by- 
 lane, and presently into a Plantation, and 
 tben tbrougb a gap in a Hedge, and tbrougb 
 a Ditcb full of Brambles, wbicb galled my 
 legs sorely. I was balf asleep by tbis time, 
 and was only brougbt to full wakefulness 
 by tbe deep baying as of a Dog some few 
 yards, as it seemed, from us. 
 
 Tbe Lantern's liglit gleamed fortb again ; 
 and in tbe circle of Clear it made I could 
 see we were surrounded by tall Trees tbat 
 witb tbeir long crooked Arms looked as
 
 192 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 tliougli tliey would entwine me in deacllj 
 embraces. 
 
 • " Hist !" the man said very low. " That's 
 surely Black Towzer's tongue." And to 
 my huge dismay he set up a sad responsive 
 Howl, very like unto that of a Hog, but not 
 at all akin to the voice of a Man. 
 
 The answer to this was a whistle, and 
 human speech, saying — 
 
 " Black Jowler !" 
 
 " Black Towzer, for a spade Guinea !" my 
 companion made answer; and in another 
 moment there came bounding towards us 
 another fellow in the same blackened mas- 
 querade as he, and with another Lantern. 
 He had with him, besides, a shaggy hound 
 that smelt me suspiciously and prowled round 
 me, growling low, I shivering the whiles. 
 
 " What have we here ?" asked the Second 
 Black ; for I made no doubt now but that 
 my Company were of that Confederacy. 
 
 "Kid loose," replied he who was to take 
 me to supper. "Given the keepers the 
 slip, and run down by Billy Boys' park.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 193 
 
 " Aha !" and lie whispered his comrade 
 ruffian. 
 
 Out went the Lanterns again, and he who 
 answered to the name of Jowler tightened 
 his grasp, and bade me for a young Tyburn 
 Token quicken my pace. So we walked 
 and walked again, poor I as sore as a pil- 
 grim tramping up the Hill to Louth — which 
 I have many times seen in those parts — 
 with Shards in his shoes. Then it must 
 come, forsooth, to more whistling ; and the 
 same Play being over, we had one more 
 Lantern to our Band, and one more Scurvy 
 Companion as Black as a Flag,* who in their 
 kennel Tongue was Mungo. And by and 
 by we were joined by Surly, and Black 
 Tom, and Grumps ; and so with these five 
 Men, who were pleased to be called as the 
 Beasts are, I stumbled along, tired, and 
 drowsy, and famishing, and thinking my 
 journey would never come to an end. 
 
 * "JfyFlag" in the original MS.; but I i^ut it 
 down as a slip of the pen, and altered it. — G. A. S. 
 VOL. I. O
 
 194 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Surely it must liave been long past mid- 
 nio-lit when we made a lialt ; and all the five 
 lanterns being lit, and making so many 
 dancing wheels of yellow, I found that we 
 were still encircled by those tall trees with 
 the twining arms. And Jowler — for it is 
 useless to speak of my conductor accord- 
 ing to Human Eule — gave me a rough pat 
 on the shoulder, and bade me cheer up, for 
 that I should have my supper very soon 
 now. All five then joined in a whistle so 
 sharp, so clear, and so w^ell sustained, that 
 it sounded well-nigh melodious; and to 
 this there came, after the lapse of a few 
 seconds, the noise as of a little peevish Ter- 
 rier barking. 
 
 " True as Touchwood," cried Black Jow- 
 ler. " In, Billy Boys, and hey for fat and 
 flagons." 
 
 With this he takes me by the shoulders, 
 telling me to fear naught, and spend my 
 money like a gentleman, and bundles me 
 before him till we came to something hard 
 as board This I presently found was a
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 195 
 
 door ; and in an instant I was in the midst 
 of a kind of Tavern parlour, all lighted up 
 with great candles stuck into lumps of clay, 
 and face to face with the Fattest Woman I 
 ever saw in my life. 
 
 " Mother Moll Drum/' quoth my conduc- 
 tor, " save you, and give me a quart of three 
 threads, or I faint. Body o' me, was ever 
 green plover so pulled as I was ?" 
 
 The Fat Woman he called Mother Moll 
 Drum was to all seeming in no very blessed 
 temper ; for she bade Jowler go hang for a 
 lean polecat, and be cursed meanwhile, and 
 that she would draw him naught. 
 
 "Come, come, Mother," Jowler said, 
 making as though to appease her, " what be 
 these tantrums ? Come, draw ; for I'm 
 as thirsty as an hour-glass, poor wretch,* 
 that has felt sand run through his gullet 
 any time these twenty years." 
 
 " Draw for yourself, rogue," says Mother 
 
 Drum ; " there's naught I'll serve you with, 
 
 unless, indeed, I were bar-woman at St. 
 
 Giles's Pound, and had to froth you your 
 
 o2
 
 196 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 last quart, as you went up the Heavy Hill 
 to Tyburn." 
 
 " We shall all go there in time — good 
 time," breaks in a deep solemn voice, drawn 
 somehow through the nose, and coming 
 from the Man-Dog they called Grumps ; 
 " meanwhile, greasy woman, let the beve- 
 rage our brother asked for be drawn, and I, 
 even Grumps, will partake thereof, and ask 
 a blessing^." 
 
 "' Woman yourself !" cries Moll Drum, in 
 
 a rage. " Woman yourself, and T in 
 
 your teetli, and woman to the mother that 
 bore you, and sat in the stocks for Light- 
 ness ! Who are you, quotha, old reverend 
 smock with the spla}^ foot ? Come up, 
 now, prithee, Bridewell Bird ! You will 
 .drink, will you ? I saw no dust or cobwebs 
 come out of your mouth. Go hang, 3'ou 
 moon-calf, false faucet, you roaring horse- 
 courser, you ranger of Turnbull, you dull 
 malt-house with a mouth of a peck and the 
 sign of the swallow above." 
 
 By this time Mother Drum was well-nigh
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 197 
 
 out of breatli, and panted, and looked so 
 hot, that they might have put her up by 
 Temple Bar on Queen Bess's birthnight for 
 a Bonfire, and so saved Tar Barrels. And 
 as she spoke she brandished a large Frying 
 Pan, from which great drops of hot grease — 
 smelling very savoury by the way — dropped 
 on to the sanded floor. The other Blacks 
 seemed in nowise disturbed by this Dis- 
 pute, but were rather amused thereby, and 
 slathered in a rino^ round Jowler and 
 Grumps and the Fat Woman, laughing. 
 
 " Never mind. Mother Drum,'' quoth 
 one ; '' she was a pig- woman once in Bart- 
 lemy Fair, and lost her temper through the 
 heat of a coal-fire roasting porkers. Was't 
 not hot. Mother Drum ? was not Tophet a 
 kind of cool cellar to it ?" 
 
 It was Surly who spoke, and Mother 
 Drum turns on him in a rage. 
 
 " You lie, you pannierman's by-blow !" 
 she cried ; " you bony muckfowl, with the 
 bony back sticking out like the ace of 
 spades on the point of a small-sword ! you
 
 198 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 lie, Bobchin, Changeling, Horseleecli ! 'Slid, 
 you Shrovetide Cutpurse, I'll scald your hide 
 with gravy, I will !" 
 
 " Ware the pan, ware the pan !" all the 
 Blacks cried out ; for the Good Woman 
 made a flourish as though she would have 
 carried out her threat ; whereupon my Man- 
 Dog, Jowler, thought it was time to inter- 
 pose, and spoke. 
 
 " There's no harm in Mother Drum, but 
 that her temper's as hot as her pan, and we 
 are late to supper. Come, Mother, Draw 
 for us, and save you still. I'll treat you to 
 burnt brandy afterwards." 
 
 "What did he call me Pig- Woman for?" 
 she grumbled, but still half mollified. 
 " What if I did waste my youth and prime 
 in cooking of porkers in a booth; I am 
 no cutpurse. I, I never shoved the tumbler 
 for tail-drawing or poll- snatching on a 
 levee-day.* But I will draw for you, and 
 welcome my guests of the game." 
 
 * Madam Drum, so far as I ciin make out the argot
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 199 
 
 " And Supper, good Moll, Supper," added 
 Jowler. 
 
 " An you had not hindered me, it would 
 have been ready upstairs. There are more 
 upstairs besides you that hunger after the 
 fat and the lean. But can you sup without 
 a cook? Will venison run off the spit 
 ready roasted, think you, like the pigs in 
 Lubberland, that jump down your throat, 
 and cry wee wee /"' 
 
 She began to bustle about, and sum- 
 moned, by the name of Cicely Grip — add- 
 ing thereto the epithet of " faggot" — a stout 
 serving-lass, who might have been comely 
 enough, but v/hose face and hands were 
 very nearly as black as those of the Man- 
 Dog's. This wench brought a number of 
 brovv^n jugs full of beer, and the Blacks took 
 
 of the day, here insinuated that her opponent had 
 been corrected at the cart's tail for stealinsr swords out 
 
 o 
 
 of the scabbards, and conveying wigs from the heads 
 of their owners, two crimes which have become obso- 
 lete since the Quality have ceased to wear swords and 
 l>eriwigs. — G. A. S.
 
 200 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 to drinking with much zest. Then Jowler, 
 who seemed a kind of lieutenant, in some 
 authority over them, gave the word of com- 
 mand to " Peel ;" and they hastened to 
 leave the room, which was hut a mean sort 
 of barn-like chamber, with bare walls, a 
 wattled roof, and a number of rough wooden 
 tables and settles, all littered with jugs 
 and Tobacco pipes. So I and the Fat 
 Woman and Jowler, Cicely Grip having 
 betaken herself to the kitchen, were left 
 together. 
 
 " Cicely will dish up. Mother Drum,'^ 
 he says ; " you have fried collops enow for 
 us, I trow ; and if more are wanted for the 
 Billy Eoys, you can to your pan again. You 
 began your brandy pottage too early to- 
 nic^ht. Mother. Let us have no more of 
 your vapours 'twixt this and day-break, 
 prithee. What would Captain Night 
 say? 
 
 *' Captain Night be hanged !'' 
 
 '*He will be hanged, as our brother 
 Surly has it, in good time, I doubt it not.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 201 
 
 Meanwhile, order must be kept at the Stag 
 o'Tyne. Get you and draw the dram I 
 promised you ; and, Mother, wash me this 
 little lad's face and hands, that he may 
 sit down to meat with us in a seemly 
 manner." 
 
 ""Who the Clink is he?" asked Mother 
 Drum, eyeing me with no very Great 
 Favour. 
 
 "He says he is little Boy Jack," answered^ 
 Mr. Jowler, gravely. " We will give him 
 another name before we have done with 
 him. Meantime he has a guinea in his 
 pocket to pay his shot, and that's enough 
 for the fat old Alewife of the Stag 
 o'Tyne." 
 
 "Fat ao^ain!" muttered Mother Drum. 
 " Is it a 'Sizes matter to be full of flesh? I 
 be fat indeed," she answered, with a sigh, 
 " and must have a chair let out o' the sides 
 for me, that these poor old hips may have 
 play. And I, that was of so buxom a 
 figure." 
 
 " Never mind your Figure, Mother," re-
 
 202 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 marked my Conductor, " but do my bidding. 
 I'll e'en go and peel too ;" and without 
 more ado he leaves us. 
 
 Madam Drum went into her kitchen and 
 fetched forth a Tin Bowl full of hot suds, 
 and with these she washed me as she had 
 been directed. I bore it all unresistingly — 
 likewise a scrubbing with a rough towel. 
 Then, when my hair was kempt with an 
 ^old Felting comb, almost toothless, I felt 
 refreshed and hungrier than ever. But 
 Mother Drum never ceased to complain of 
 having been called fat. 
 
 " Time was, my smooth-faced Coney," 
 she said, " that I was as lithe and limber as 
 you are, and was called Jaunty Peg. And 
 now poor old Moll cooks collops for those 
 that are born to dance jigs in chains for 
 the north-east wind to play the fiddle to. 
 Time was when a whole army followed me, 
 when I beat the drum before the great 
 Duke." 
 
 "What Duke?" I asked, looking up at 
 her great red face.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 203 
 
 "What Duke, milksop! Why, who 
 should I mean but the Duke that won 
 Hochstedt and Eamiiies : — the Ace of 
 Trumps, my dear, that saved the Queen of 
 Hearts, the good Queen Anne, so bravely. 
 What Duke should I mean but John o' 
 Marlborough. 
 
 " I have seen Mm^'' I said, with childish 
 gravity. 
 
 " Seen him ! when and where, loblolly- 
 boy? You're too young to have been a 
 drummer." 
 
 " I saw him," I answered, blushing and 
 stammering ; "I saw him when — when I 
 was a little Gentleman." 
 
 "Lord save us!" cries Mother Drum, 
 bursting into a joll}^ laugh. " A Gentle- 
 man ! since when, your Lordship, I pray ? 
 But we're all Gentlefolks here, I trow ; and 
 Captain Night's the Marquis of Aylesbury 
 Jail. A Gentleman ! oho 1" 
 
 Hereupon, and which, to my great relief, 
 quitted me of the perturbation brought on 
 by a Easli Admission, there came three
 
 204 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 knocks from above, and Mother Drum said 
 hurriedly, " Supper, supper ;" and opening 
 a side-door, pushes me on to a staircase, and 
 tells me to mount, and pull a reverence to 
 the company I found at table. 
 
 Twenty steps brought me to another door 
 I found on the jar, and I passed into a great 
 room with a roof of wooden joists, and a 
 vast table in the middle set out with supper. 
 There was no table-cloth ; but there were 
 plenty of meats smoking hot in great 
 pewter dishes. I never saw, either, so 
 many bottles and glasses on one board in 
 my life ; and besides these, there was good 
 store of great shining Flagons, carved and 
 chased, which I afterwards knew to be of 
 Solid Silver. 
 
 Eound this table were gathered at least 
 Twenty Men ; and but for their voices I 
 should never have known that five among 
 them were my companions of just now. 
 For all were attired in a very brave 
 Manner, wore wigs and powder and em- 
 broidered waistcoats; although, what I
 
 CAPTAIX DANGEROUS. 205 
 
 thought strange, each man dined in boots, 
 with a gold-laced hat on his head, and his 
 Hanger by his side, and a brace of Pistols 
 on the table beside him. Yet I must make 
 two exceptions to this rule. He whom 
 they called Surly, had on a full frizzed wig 
 and a cassock and bands, that, but for his 
 rascal face, v/ould have put me in mind of 
 the Parson at St. Greorge's, Hanover Square, 
 who always seemed to be so angry with 
 me. Surly was Chaplain, and said Grace, 
 and ate and drank more than any one 
 there. Lastly, at the table's head, sat a 
 thin, pale, proper kind of a man, wearing 
 his own hair long, in a silken club, dressed 
 in the pink of Fashion, as though he were 
 bidden to a birthday, with a dandy rapier 
 at his side, and instead of Pistols, a Black 
 Velvet Visor laid by the side of his plate. 
 He had very large blue eyes and very fair 
 hair. He might have been some thirty-five 
 years old, and the guests, who treated him 
 with much deference, addressed him as 
 Captain Night.
 
 20G THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Mr. Jowler, whose hat had as brave a 
 cock as any there, made rae sit by him ; 
 and, with three more knocks and the Par- 
 son's Grace, we all fell to supper. They 
 helped me plentifully, and I ate my fill. 
 Then my friend gave me a silver porringer 
 full of wine-and-water. It was all very 
 good ; but I knew not what viands I was 
 eating, and made bold to ask Jowler. 
 
 " 'Tis venison, boy, that was never shot 
 by the King's keeper," he answered. " But, 
 if you would be free of Charlwood Chase, 
 and wish to get out yet with a whole skin, 
 I should advise you to eat your meat and 
 ask no questions." 
 
 I was very much frightened at this, and 
 said no more until the end of Supper. When 
 they had finished, they fell to drinking of 
 Healths, m'eat bowls of Punch beinor 
 brought to them for that purpose. The 
 first toast was the King, and that fell to 
 Jowler. 
 
 " The King !" says he, rising. 
 
 " Over the water?" they ask.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 207 
 
 " No/' answers Jowler. " The Kin 
 
 t5 
 
 everywhere. King James, and God bless 
 him." 
 
 "I won't drink that^' objects the Chap- 
 lain. " You know I am a King George 
 man." 
 
 "Drink the Foul Fiend, an' you will," 
 retorts the Proposer. " You'd be stanch 
 and true either way. Now, Billy Boys, the 
 King !" 
 
 And they fell to tumbling down on their 
 knees, and drinking His Majesty in brim- 
 ming bumpers. I joined in the ceremony 
 perforce, although I knew nothing about ^ 
 King James, save that Monarch my Grand- 
 mother used to Speak about, who Withdrew 
 himself from these kingdoms in the year 
 1688 ; and at Church 'twas King George 
 they were wont to pray for, and not King 
 James. And little did I w^een that, in 
 drinking this Great Person on my knees, I 
 was disobeying the Precept of my dear dead 
 Kinswoman. 
 
 " I have a bad foot," quoth Captain Night,
 
 208 THE STRANGE ADYEXTURES OF 
 
 *' and cannot stir from my chair ; but I 
 drink all healtlis that come from loyal 
 hearts." 
 
 Many more Healths followed. The Chap- 
 lain gave the Church, ''and confusion to 
 Old Kapine, that goes about robbing chan- 
 cels of their chalices, and parsons of their 
 dues, and the very poor-box of alms." And 
 then they drank, " Vert and Venison," and 
 then, " A black face, a white smock, and a 
 red hand." And then they betook them- 
 selves to Eoaring choruses, and Smoking 
 and Drinking galore, until I fell fast asleep 
 in my chair. 
 
 I woke up not much before Noon the 
 next day, in a neat little chamber very 
 cleanly appointed; but found to my sur- 
 prise that, in addition to my own clothes, 
 there was laid by my bedside a little Smock 
 or Gaberdine of coarse linen, and a bowlful! 
 of some sooty stuff that made me shudder to 
 look at. And my Surprise was heightened 
 into amazed astonishment when, having 
 donned my own garments, and while
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 209 
 
 curiously turning over the Gaberdine, there 
 came a knock, and anon stepped into the 
 room the same comely Servant-maid that 
 had ridden witli us in the Wagon six 
 months since, on that sad journey to school, 
 and that had been so kind to me in the way 
 of new milk and cheesecakes. 
 
 She was very smartly dressed, with a gay ^^ 
 flowered apron, and a flyciip all over glass- 
 beads, like so many Blue-bottles. And she 
 had a gold brooch in her stomacher, and 
 fine thread hose, and red Heels to her 
 shoes. 
 
 She was as kind to me as ever, and told 
 me that I was among those who would treat 
 me well, and stand my friends, if I obeyed 
 their commands. And I, who, I confess, 
 had by this time begun to look on the 
 Elacks and their Ways with a kind of 
 Schoolboy glee, rose, nothing loth, and 
 donned the Strange Accoutrements my 
 entertainers provided for me. The girl 
 helped me to dress, smiling and giggling 
 mightily the while ; but, as I dressed, I 
 
 VOL. T. p
 
 210 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 could not help calling her by the name 
 she had given me in the Wagon, and 
 asking how she had come into that strange 
 Place. 
 
 "Hush, hush!" says she. " I'm Marian 
 now, Maid Marian, that lives with Mother 
 Drum, and serves the Gentlemen Blacks, 
 ^ and brings Captain Night his morning 
 Draught. None of us are called by our 
 real names at tlie Stag o' Tyne, my dear. 
 We all are in No-man's-land." 
 
 " But where is No-man's-land, and what 
 is the Stag o' Tyne ?" I asked, as she sHpped 
 the Gaberdine over my head. 
 
 " No-man's-land is just in the left-hand 
 top Corner of Charlwood Chase, after you 
 have turned to the left, and gone as 
 far forward as you can by taking two 
 steps backward for every one straight 
 on," answers the saucy hussy. " And 
 the Stag o' Tyne's even a Christian House 
 of Entertainment that Mother Drum 
 keeps." 
 
 "And who is Mother Drum?" I
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 211 
 
 resumed, my eyes opening wider than 
 ever. 
 
 " A decent Ale wife, much given to 
 grease, and that cooks the King's Veni- 
 son for Captain Night and his Gentlemen 
 Blacks." 
 
 " And Captain Night, — who is he ?" 
 " Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you 
 no lies," she makes reply. " Captain 
 Night is a Grentleman every inch of 
 him, and as sure as Tom o' Ten Thou- 
 sand." 
 
 "And the Gentlemen Blacks?" 
 "Your mighty particular," quoth she, 
 regarding me with a comical look. " Well, 
 my dear, since you are to be a Black your- 
 self, and a Gentleman to boot, I don't mind 
 telling you. The Gentlemen Blacks are all 
 Bold Hearts, that like to kill the King's 
 Venison without a Eanger's Warrant, and 
 to eat of it without paying Fee nor Eoyalt}^, 
 and that drink of the very best — " 
 
 " And that have Dog-Avhips to lay about 
 the shoulders of tattling minxes and curious 
 p2
 
 212 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 urchins," cries, to my dismay, a voice Le- 
 liind us, and so to us — by his voice at least 
 — Captain Night, but in his body no longer 
 the same gay spark that I had seen the 
 night before, or rather that morning early. 
 He was as Black, and Hairy, and Savage- 
 looking as any — as Jowler, or any one of 
 that Dark Gang ; and in no way differed 
 from them, save that on the middle finger of 
 his Eight Hand there glittered from out all 
 his Grease and Soot, a Great Diamond Eing. 
 
 " Come," he cries, " Mistress Nimble 
 Tongue, will you be giving your Eed Eag 
 a gallop yet, and Billy Boys waiting to 
 break their Fast? Despatch, and set out 
 the boy, as I bade you." 
 
 " I am no kitchen-wench, I," answers the 
 Maid of the "Wagon, tossing her head. 
 " Cicely o' the Cinders yonder will bring 
 you to your umble-pie, and a Jack of small- 
 beer to cool you, I trow. Was it live Char- 
 coal or Seacoal embers that you swallowed 
 last night, Captain, makes you so dry this 
 morning ?"
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 213 
 
 *' Never mind, Goody Slack Jaw," says 
 Captain Night. " I shall be thirstier anon 
 from listening to your prate. Will you 
 hurry now. Gadfly, or is the sun to sink be- 
 fore we get hounds in leash?" 
 
 Thus admonished, the girl takes me by the 
 arm, and, without more ado, dips a rag in 
 the pot of black pigment, and begins to 
 smear all my hands, and face, and throat, 
 with dabs of disguising shade. And, hs she 
 bade me do the same to my Garment, and 
 never spare Soot, I fell to work too, making 
 myself into the likeness of a Chimney -boy, 
 till they might have taken me into a nur- 
 sery to Frighten naughty children. 
 
 Captain Night sat by himself on the side 
 of the bed, idly clicking a pistol-lock till 
 such time as he proceeded to load it, the 
 which threw me into a cold tremor, not 
 knowing but that it might be the Custom 
 among the Gentlemen Blacks to blow out 
 the brains in the morning of those they liad 
 feasted over-night. Yet, as there never 
 was Schoolboy, I suppose, but delighted in
 
 214 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Soiling of his raiment, and making himself 
 as Black as any sweep in Whetstone Park, 
 so did I begin to feel something like a 
 Pleasure in being masqueraded up to this 
 Disguise, and began to wish for a Pistol 
 such as Captain Night had in his Hand, 
 and such a Diamond Eing as he wore on 
 his finger. 
 
 " There !" cries the Maid of the Wagon, 
 when I was well Blacked, survepng me 
 approvingly. " You're a real imp of Charl- 
 wood Cliase now. Ugh ! thou young Eig ! 
 I'll kiss you when the Captain brings you 
 home, and good soap and water takes off 
 those mourning weeds before supper-time." 
 
 She had clapped a great Deerskin cap 
 on my head, and giving me a friendly pat, 
 was going off, when I could not help ask- 
 ing her in a sly whisper what had become 
 of the Pewterer of Pannier Alley. 
 
 " What ! you remember him, do you ?" 
 she returned, with a half-smile and a half- 
 sigh. " Well, the Pewterer's hero, and as 
 black as you are."
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 215 
 
 "But I thought you were to wed," I 
 remarked. 
 
 "Well!" she went on, ahnost fiercely, 
 " cannot one wed at the Stag o' Tyne ? 
 We have a brave Chaplain down-stairs, — 
 as good as a Fleet Parson any day, I wuss." 
 
 " But the Pewterer ?" I persisted. 
 
 " 111 hang the Pewterer round thy neck !" 
 she exclaimed in a pet. "The Pewterer 
 was unfortunate in his business, and so 
 took to the Eoad ; and thus we have all 
 come together in Charlwood Chase. But 
 ask me no more questions, or Captain 
 Night will be deadly angry. Look, he fumes 
 already." 
 
 She tripped away saying this, and in 
 Time, I think ; for indeed the Captain was 
 beginning to show signs of impatience. 
 She being gone, he took me on his knee, 
 all Black as I was, and in a voice kind 
 enough, but full of authority, bade me tell 
 him all my History and the bare truth, else 
 would he have me tied neck and heels and 
 thrown to the fishes.
 
 210 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 So I told this strange Man all : — of Ha- 
 nover Square, and my earliest childhood. 
 Of the Unknown Lady, and her Behaviour 
 and conversation, even to her Death. Of 
 her Funeral, and the harsh bearing of Mis- 
 tress Talmash and the Steward Cadwallader 
 unto me in my Helplessness and Loneliness. 
 Of my being smuggled away in a Wagon 
 and sent to school to Gnawbit, and of the 
 Barbarous cruelty with which I had been 
 treated by that Monster. And finally, of 
 the old Gentleman that used to cry, " Bear 
 it ! Bear it !" and of his giving me a 
 Guinea, and bidding me run away. 
 
 He listened to all I had to say, and then 
 putting me down, 
 
 " A strange story," he thoughtfully re- 
 marks, " and not learnt out of the story- 
 books either, or I sorely err. You have not 
 a Lying Pace, my man. Wait a while, and 
 you'll wear a Mask thicker than all that 
 screen of soot you have upon you now." 
 But in this he was mistaken; for John 
 Dangerous ever scorned deception, and
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 217 
 
 through life has always acted fair and 
 above-board. 
 
 "And that Guinea," he continued. 
 "Hast it still r 
 
 I answered that I had, producing it as I 
 spoke, and that I was ready to pay my 
 Eeckoning, and to treat him and the others, 
 in which, meseems, there spoke less of the 
 little Eunaway Schoolboy that had turned 
 Sweep, than of the Little Grentleman that 
 was wont to be a Patron to his Grand- 
 mother's lacqueys in Hanover Square. 
 
 " Keep thy piece of Gold,'' he answers, 
 with a smile. " Thou shalt pay thy footing 
 soon enough. Or wilt thou go forth with 
 thy Guinea and spend it, and be taken by thy 
 Schoolmaster to be w^hipped, perchance to 
 death ?" 
 
 I replied that I had the much rather stay 
 with him, and the Gentlemen. 
 
 "The less said of the 'Gentlemen' the 
 better. However, 'tis all one : we are all 
 Gentlemen at the Stag o' Tyne. Even thou 
 art a Gentleman, little EagamuftV
 
 218 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 " I am a Gentleman of long descent ; and 
 my fathers liave fought and bled for the 
 True King ; and Norman blood's better than 
 German puddle-mud," I replied, repeating 
 well-nigh Mechanically that which my dear 
 Kinswoman had said to me, and Instilled 
 into me many and many a time. In my 
 degraded Slavery, I had ?^^//-nigh forgotten 
 the proud old words ; but only once it 
 chanced that they had risen up unbidden, 
 when I was flouted and jeered at as Little 
 Boy Jack by my schoolmates. Heaven help 
 us, how villanously cruel are children to 
 those who are of their own age and Poor and 
 Friendless ! What is it that makes young 
 hearts so Hard? The boys Derided and 
 mocked me more than ever for that I said I 
 was a Gentleman; and by and by comes 
 Gnawbit, and beats me black and blue — a}-, 
 and gory too — with a furze-stub, for telling 
 of Lies, as he falsely said, the EuJfian. 
 
 "WeU," resumed Captain Night, "thou 
 shalt stay with us, young Gentleman. But 
 weigh it soberly, boy," he continued. '' Thou
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 219 
 
 art old enougli to know black from white, 
 and brass from gold. Be advised; know 
 what we Blacks are. We are only Thieves 
 that go about stealing the King's Deer in 
 Charlwood Chase." 
 
 I told him that I would abide by him and 
 his Company ; and with a grim smile he 
 clapped me on the shoulder, and told me that 
 now indeed I was a Gentleman Black, and 
 Forest Free.
 
 220 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 CHAPTER THE EIGHTH. 
 
 THE HISTORY OF MOTHER DRUM. 
 
 During the long niglits I remained at the 
 Stag o' Tjne ere I was thought Worthy to 
 join the Blacks in their nocturnal adven- 
 tures, or was, by my Hardihood and powers 
 of Endurance — poor little mite that I was 
 — adjudged to be Forest Free, I remained 
 under the charge of Ciceley of the Cinder}', 
 and of the corpulent Tap stress whom the 
 Blacks called Mother Drum. These two 
 women were very fond of gossiping with 
 me ; and especially did Mother Drum love 
 to converse with me upon her own Career, 
 which had been of the most Chequered, not 
 to say Amazing nature. I have already 
 hinted that at one time this Eemarkable
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 221 
 
 Woman had professed the Military Pro- 
 fession, in which she had shone with almost 
 a Manly BrilHance ; and from her various 
 confidences — all delivered to me as they 
 were in shreds and patches, and imparted 
 at the oddest times and seasons — I was 
 enabled to shape her (to me) divdtting 
 history into something like the following 
 shape. 
 
 *' I was horn, I think," quoth Mother 
 Drum, "in the year 1660, being that of 
 his happy Eest oration to the throne of 
 these Eealms of his late Sacred Majesty 
 King Charles the Second. My father was 
 a small farmer, who fed his pigs and tended 
 his potato gardens at the foot of the Wick- 
 low Mountains, about twelve miles from the 
 famous city of Dublin. His name was 
 0' something, which it concerns you not to 
 know, youngster, and he had tlie misfortune 
 to be a Papist. I say the misfortune ; for 
 in those days, well-a-day, as in these too, 
 and more's the shame, to be a Papist meant 
 bring a poor, unfortunate creature con-
 
 222 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 tinually Hunted up and down, Harassed 
 and Harried far worse than any leathern- 
 skinned Beast of Venery that the Gentlemen 
 Blacks pursue in Charlwood Chase. He had 
 suffered much under the iron rule " (these 
 ^.vere not exactly Mother Drum's words, for 
 her language was anything, as a rule, but 
 well chosen ; but I have polished up her 
 style a little,) " of the cruel Usurper, Oliver 
 Cromwell; that is to say the Eedcoated 
 Ironsides of that Bad Man had on three 
 several occasions burnt his Shelling to the 
 ground, stolen his Pigs, and grubbed up his 
 potato ground. Once had they ran awa}' 
 with his wife, (my dear Mother), twice had 
 tliey half-hanged him to a tree-branch, and 
 at divers intervals had they tortured him 
 by tying lighted matches between his 
 fingers. When, however, His Sacred 
 Majesty was, happily restored there were 
 hopes that the poor Eomanists would enjoy 
 a little Comfort and Tranquillit}^ ; but these 
 Fond aspirations were speedily and cruelly 
 dashed to the ground; for the Anglican
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 223 
 
 Bisliops and Clergy being put into pos- 
 session of the Sees and Benefices of which 
 they had been so long deprived, occupied 
 themselves much more with Hounding 
 Down those who did not live by the Thirty- 
 nine Articles and the Liturgy, than in 
 preaching Peace and Groodwill amon^ all 
 men. So the Papists had a worse time of 
 it than ever. My Father, honest man, tried 
 to temporise between the two parties, but 
 was ever in danger of being shot by his 
 own friends as a Traitor, even if he escaped 
 half-hanging at the hands of the Protestants 
 as a Eecusant. Well, after all. Jack high or 
 Jack low, the days must come to an end, 
 and Spring, Summer, Autumn, and Winter 
 must follow upon one another, and boys and 
 girls were born to my father, and the pigs 
 littered, and were sold at market, and the 
 potatoes grew and were eaten whether 
 Oliver Cromwell, or his son Dickon, or 
 Charles Stuart — I beg pardon. His Sacred 
 Majesty — was uppermost. Tlius it was I 
 came into the world in the Eestoration year.
 
 224 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 " I was a bold, strapping, fearless kind of 
 a girl, much fonder of Eomping and Horse- 
 play of the Tomboy order than of the Pur- 
 suits and Pastimes of my own sex. The 
 difference was more remarkable, as you know 
 the Irish girls are distinguished above all 
 other* Maidens in creation by an extreme 
 Delicacy and Coyness, not to say Prudish- 
 ness of Demeanour. But Betty — I was 
 christened Elizabeth — was always gam- 
 mocking and tousling with the Lads instead 
 of holding by her Mother's apron, or 
 demurely sitting by her spinning-wheel, or 
 singing plaintive ballads to herself to the 
 music of the Irish Harp, which, in my time, 
 almost every Farmer's Daughter could Play. 
 Before I was seven years old I could feed 
 the pigs and dig up tlie potato ground. 
 Before I was ten, I could catch a colt and 
 ride him, barebacked and without bridle, 
 holding on by his mane, round the green in 
 front of my Father's Homestead. Before I 
 was twelve, I was a match for any Boy of 
 my own age at a bout of fisticufts, ay, and
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 225 
 
 at swinging a blackthorn so as to bring it 
 down with a thwack on the softest part of a 
 gossoon's crown. I knew little of spinning, 
 or playing, or harping ; but I could land a 
 trout, and make good play with a pike. I 
 could brew a jug of Punch, and at a jig could 
 dance down the lithest gambriler of those 
 parts, Dan Meagher, the Blind Piper of 
 Swords. Those who knew me used to call 
 me ' Brimstone Betty,' and in my own 
 family I went by the name of the ' Bold 
 Dragoon,' much to the miscontentment of 
 my father, who tried hard to bring me ta 
 a more feminine habit of Body and frame of 
 mind, i;otli by affectionate expostulation, and 
 by assiduous larruping with a stirru|> 
 leather. But 'twas all of no use. At six- 
 teen I was the greatest Tearcoat of the 
 Country side ; and Father Macanasser, the 
 village priest, gave it as his opinion that I 
 must either be married, or sent to Dublin 
 into decent service, or go to Euination. 
 
 " It chanced that one fine summer day, I 
 was gammocking in a hay field with another 
 
 VOL. T. Q
 
 226 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 lass, a friend of mine, whom I had made 
 almost as bold as myself. "We had a cudgel 
 apiece, and were playing at single-stick, 
 in our mad-cap fashion, laughing and 
 screaming like Bedlamites, meanwhile. 
 Only a hedge separated us from the high- 
 road to Dublin, which ran up hill, and by 
 and by came toiling up the hill, sticking 
 every other minute in a rut, or jolting into 
 a hole — for the roads were in infamous 
 condition about here, as, indeed, all over the 
 kingdom of Ireland — a grand coach, all over 
 painting and gilding, drawn by six grey 
 horses, with flowing manes and tails. The two 
 leading pair had postilions in liveries of blue 
 and silver, and great badges of coats-of-arms, 
 and the equipage was further attended by a 
 couple of outriders or yeomen-prickers in 
 the same rich livery, but with cutlasses at 
 their sides, petronels in their holsters, and 
 blunderbusses on their hips, to guard against 
 Tories and Eapparees, who then infested 
 the land, and cared little whether it was 
 Daylight or Moonlight — whether it was in
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 227 
 
 the Green tree or the Dry that they went 
 about their thievish business. The person- 
 age to whom this grand coach belonged 
 was a stout, Majestic old Grentleman with a 
 monstrous black periwig, a bright star on 
 his breast, and a broad blue ribbon crossing 
 his plum-coloured velvet doublet. He had 
 dismounted from his heavy coach, while the 
 horses were fagging up hill, and by the 
 help of a great crutch-staff of ebony, orna- 
 mented with silver, was toiling after them. 
 Hearing our prattling and laughing, he 
 looked over the hedge and saw us in the 
 very thick of our mimic Combat. This 
 seemed to divert him exceedingly; and 
 although we, seeing so grand a gentleman 
 looking at us, were for suspending our Tom- 
 foolery, and stood, to say the truth, rather 
 shamefaced than otherwise among the hay- 
 cocks, he bade us with cheery and encou- 
 raging words to proceed, and laughed to see 
 us so sparring at one another, till his sides 
 shook again. But all the fire was taken 
 out of our combat, by the presence of so 
 q2
 
 228 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 unwonted a Spectator, and after a brief lapse 
 we dropped cudgels, and stood staring and 
 blushing, quite dashed and confused. Then 
 he beckoned us towards him in a most 
 affable manner, and we came awkwardly 
 and timorously, yet still with great curiosity 
 to know what was to follow, througli a gap 
 in the hedge, and so stood before him in the 
 road. And then cries out one of the 
 Yeomen-Prickers — ' Wenches I drop your 
 best curtsey to his Grace the Duke of 
 / It was, indeed, that famous noble- 
 man, lately Lord Lieutenant, and still one 
 of the highest, mightiest, and most puissant 
 Princes in the Kingdom of L'eland. To 
 be brief, he put a variety of questions 
 to us, respecting our belonghigs, and at 
 my answers seemed most condescendingly 
 pleased, and at those of my playmate (whose 
 name was Molly O'Flaherty, and who had 
 red hair, and a cast in her eye), but mode- 
 rately pleased. On her, therefore, he be- 
 stowed a gold piece, and so dismissed her ; 
 telling her to take care of what her Tom Boy
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 229 
 
 pranks might lead her to. But to me, while 
 conferring the like present, he was good 
 enough to say that I was a spirited lass fit 
 for better things, and that if my Father and 
 Mother would bring me shortly to his 
 House in Dublin, he would see what could 
 be done, to the end of bettering my con- 
 dition in life. Whereupon he was assisted 
 to his seat by one of four running footmen 
 that tramped by his side, and away he w^nt in 
 his coach and six, leaving me in great joy 
 and contentment. In only a few minutes 
 came after him, not toiling, but bursting 
 up the hill, a whole plump of gallant cava- 
 liers in buff coats, bright corslets, and em- 
 broidered bandoliers over them, wearing 
 green plumes in their hats, and flourishing 
 their broadswords in the sunshine. These 
 were the gentlemen of his bodyguard. They 
 questioned me as to my converse with his 
 Grace, and when I told them, laughed and 
 said that I was in luck. 
 
 '' The Duke of meant me no harm, 
 
 and I am sure did me none ; and yet, my
 
 230 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 dear, I must date all my misfortunes from 
 the time I was introduced to his Grace. 
 You see that these gentlefolks have so 
 much to think of, and are not in the habit 
 of troubling their heads much as to what 
 becomes of a poor peasant girl, after the 
 whim which may have led them to 
 patronize her has once passed over. My 
 mother made me a new linsey woolsey 
 petiljoat, and a snood of scarlet frieze, and 
 I was as fine as ninepence, with the first 
 pair of stockings on that ever I had worn 
 in my life, when I was taken to Dublin to 
 a grand house by the Quay side, to be pre- 
 sented to his Grace. He had almost for- 
 gotten who I was, when his Groom of the 
 Chamber procured us an audience. Then 
 he remembered how he had laughed at my 
 gambols with Molly O'Flaherty in the hay- 
 field, and how they amused him, and 
 how he thought my Romping ways might 
 divert My Lady Duchess his Consort, who 
 was a pining, puling, melancholic Tempera- 
 ment, and much afflicted with the Vapours,
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 231 
 
 for want of sometliing to do. So lie was 
 pleased to smile upon me again, and to give 
 my mother five pounds, and to promise that 
 I should be well bestowed in his household 
 as a waiting-woman, or Bower-maiden, or 
 some such like capacity ; and then he made 
 me a present, as though I were a pnppy- 
 dog, to Her Grace the Duchess, and having 
 affairs of state to attend to, thought no 
 more about ' Brimstone Betty.' My 
 sprightly ways and random talk amused 
 her Grace for awhile ; but she had too many 
 gewgaws and playthings, and I found, after 
 not many days, that my popularity was on 
 the wane, and that I could not hope to main- 
 tain it against the attractions of a French wait- 
 ing-maid, a monkey, a parrot, a poodle, and a 
 little Dwarfish boy-attendant that was half 
 fiddler and half buffoon. So my conse- 
 quence faded and faded, and I was sneered 
 at and flouted as a young Savage and a young 
 Irish by the English lacqueys about the 
 House, and I sank from my Lady's keeping- 
 room to the antechamber, and thence to
 
 232 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 the servant's hall, and thence, after a very 
 brief lapse, to the kitchen, where I was very 
 little better than a Scullish and Plate-washer, 
 and not half so well entreated as Cicely of 
 the Cinders is here. I pined and fretted ; but 
 time went on, and to my misfortune I was 
 growing taller and shapelier. I had a very 
 clear skin, and very black hair and eyes, 
 and, though I say it that shouldn't, as neat 
 a leg and foot as you would wish to see in 
 a summer's day, and the men folk told me 
 tliat I was comely. They only told me so, 
 the false perfidious hounds, for my destruc- 
 tion. 
 
 " Well, child, you are too 3"0ung to under- 
 stand these things ; and I hope that when 
 you grow up, you will not do to poor forlorn 
 girls as I was done by. A dicing soldier 
 fellow that was a hanger-on at my Lord 
 Duke's house, and was called Captain, ran 
 away with me. Of course I was at once 
 discarded from the Great House as a good- 
 for-nothing Light o' love, and was told 
 that if ever I presumed to show my face on
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 233 
 
 the Quay-side again I should be sent to the 
 Spinning House, and whipped. They had 
 better have taken care of me while I was 
 with them. The Captain dressed me up in 
 fine clothes for a month or so, and gave me 
 paint and j)atches, and took me to the Play- 
 house with a mask on, and then he got 
 stabbed in a broil after some gambling bout 
 at a China House in Smock Alley, and I 
 was left in the wide world with two satin 
 sacques, a box of cosmetiques, a broken fan, 
 two spade guineas, and little else besides 
 what I stood upright in. Eeturn to my 
 Pather and Mother I dared not ; for I knew 
 that the tidings of my misconduct had 
 already been conveyed to them, and had 
 half broken their hearts, and my offence was 
 one that is unpardonable in the children of 
 the poorest and humblest of the Irishry. 
 There was Bitter Bread before me, if I chose 
 to follow, as thousands of poor, cozened, 
 betrayed creatures before me had done, a 
 Naughty Life; but this, with unutterable 
 Loathing and Scorn, I cast away from me ;
 
 234 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 and having, from my Dare-devil Temper, a 
 kind of Pride and High Stomach made me 
 determine to earn my livelihood in a bold 
 and original manner. They had taught me 
 to read at the Great House (though I knew 
 not great A from a bowl's foot when I came 
 into it) and so one of the first things I had 
 spelt out was a chap-book ballad of Mary 
 Ambree, the female soldier, that was at the 
 siege of Ghent, and went through all the 
 wars in Flanders in Queen Bess's time. 
 ' "What woman has done, woman can do,' 
 cries I to myself, surveying my bold and 
 masculine lineaments, my flashing black 
 eyes, and ruddy tint, my straight, stout 
 limbs, and frank, dashing gait. Ah ! I was 
 very different to the fat, pursy, old ale-wife 
 who discourses with you now — in the glass. 
 Without more ado I cut off my long black 
 hair close to my head, stained my hands 
 with walnut juice, (for they had grown 
 white and soft and plump from idling about 
 in the Great House), and went off to a 
 Crimp in the Liberty that was enlisting
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 235 
 
 men (against the law, but here many things 
 are done against both Law and Prophets), 
 for the King of France's service. 
 
 "This was in the year '80, and I was 
 twenty years of age. King Louis had then 
 no especial Brigade of Irish Troops — that 
 famous corps not being formed until after 
 the Eevolution — and his Scotch Guards, a 
 pinchbeck, purse-proud set of beggarly 
 cavaliers, would not have any Irishry among 
 them. I scorned to deny my lineage, and 
 indeed my tongue would have soon betrayed 
 me, had I done so ; and the name I listed 
 under vv^as that of James Moriarty. One 
 name is as good as another when you are 
 going to the wars ; and no name is, per- 
 chance, the best of any. As James Moriarty, 
 after perfecting myself in musket-drill, and 
 the pike-exercise, in our winter quarters at 
 Dunkirk, I was entered in the Gardes Fran- 
 9ais, a portion of the renowned Maison 
 du Eoy, or Household Troops, and as such 
 went through the second Rhenish cam- 
 paign, taking my share, and a liberal one
 
 236 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 too, in killing my fellow-Christians, burn- 
 ing villages, and stealing poultry. Nay, 
 through excessive precaution, lest my sex 
 should he discovered, I made more pre- 
 tensions than the rest of my Comrades to 
 be considered a lady-killer, and the Captain 
 of my Company, Monsieur de la Eibaldiere, 
 did me the honour to say that no Farmer's 
 Daughter was safe from ' Le Bel Irlandais,' 
 or Handsome Irishman, as they called me. 
 Heaven help us ! From whom are the Far- 
 mer's daughters, or the Farmers themselves 
 safe in war time? 
 
 " When peace was declared, I found that 
 I had risen to the dignity of Sergeant, and 
 carried my Halberd with an assured strut 
 and swagger, nobody dreaming that I was 
 a wild Irish girl from the Wicklow Moun- 
 tains. I might have risen, in time, to a 
 commission and the Cross of St. Louis ; but 
 the piping times of peace turned all such 
 brave grapes sour. I was glad enough, 
 when the alternative was given me, of 
 accompanying my Captain, Monsieur de
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 237 
 
 la Eibaldiere, to Paris, as his Yalet de 
 Chambre, or of mouldering away, without 
 hope of Promotion, in some country barrack, 
 to choose the former, and led, for a year or 
 two, a gay, easy life enough in the French 
 Capital. But, alas ! that which I had 
 hidden from a whole army in the field, I 
 could not keep a secret from one rubbishing, 
 penniless, popinjay of a Captain in the 
 Gardes Prangaises. I told this miscreant, 
 de la Eibaldiere, that I was a woman ; for I 
 was mad and vain enough to Love him. 
 These are matters again, child, that you 
 cannot understand ; but I have said enough 
 when I declare that if ever there was power 
 in the Curse of Cromwell to blight a Wicked 
 Man, that curse ought to light upon Henri 
 de la Eibaldiere. 
 
 " I took a diss^ust to the male attire after 
 this ; but being yet in the prime of my 
 womanhood, and as fond as ever of athletic 
 diversions, I engaged myself to a Prench 
 mountebank posture-master to dance Co- 
 rantoes on the Tight and Slack Eope,
 
 238 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 accompanying myself meanwhile by reveilles 
 on the Drum, an instrument in which I had 
 become a proficient. The Posture Master, 
 finding out afterwards that I was agile and 
 Valiant, not only at Dancing but at Fight- 
 in a\ must needs have me wield the broad- 
 sword and the quarterstafF against all comers 
 on a public platform; and, as the Irish 
 Amazon, I achieved great success, and had 
 my Employer not been a thief, should have 
 gained much money. He was in the habit, 
 not only of robbing his woman-performers, 
 but of beating them ; but I promise you 
 the first time the villain ofiered to slash at 
 me with his dog-whip, I had him under the 
 jaw with my fist in the handsomest manner, 
 and then tripping up his heels, and hurling 
 him down on his own stage, and (having a 
 right piece of ashplant in my grip) I did so 
 curry his hide in sight of a full audience, 
 that he howled for mercy, and the ground- 
 lings, who thought it part of the show, 
 clapped their hands till they were sore and 
 shouted till they were hoarse. Our engage-
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 239 
 
 ment came to an end after this, and in a 
 somewhat disagreeable manner for me ; for 
 the Posture-Master happened to be the by- 
 blow of a Doctor of the Sorbonne, who was 
 brother to an Abbe, who was brother to an 
 opera-dancer, wdio had interest with a car- 
 dinal, who was uncle to a gentleman of the 
 Chamber, who was one of Pere la Chaise's 
 pet penitents; and this Eeverend Father, 
 having the King's ear, denounced me to his 
 Majesty as a Spy, a Heretic, a Jansenist, a 
 Coureuse, and all sorts of things ; and by a 
 lettre de Cachet, as they call their warrants, 
 I was sent off to the prison of the Madelo- 
 nettes, there to diet on bread and water, to 
 be herded wdtli the vilest of my sex, to card 
 wool, and to receive, morning and evening, 
 the Discipline (as they call it) of Leathern 
 thongs, ten to a handful, and three blood- 
 knots in each. I grew sick of being tawed 
 for offences I had never committed, and so 
 made bold one moi*ning to try and strangle 
 the Mother of the Workroom, who sat over 
 us with a rattan, while we carded wool. Upon
 
 240 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OV 
 
 which I was bound to a post, and received more 
 stripes, my lad, in an hour than ever your 
 Schoolmaster gave you in a week. That 
 same night I tried to burn the prison down ; 
 and then they put me in the dark dungeon 
 called La Grande Force, with six inches of 
 water in it and any number of rats. I was 
 threatened with prosecution at their old 
 Bailey, or Chatelet, with the Question (that 
 is, the torture) ordinary and extraordinary, 
 with the galleys for life as a wind-up, even 
 if I escaped the gibbet in the place de Greve. 
 Luckily for me, at this time the Gentleman 
 of the Chamber fell into disgrace with Father 
 la Chaise for eating a Chicken Sausage in 
 Lent ; and to spite him and the Minister, 
 and the Cardinal and the Opera Dancer, and 
 the Abbe and the Doctor of the Sorbonne, 
 and the Posture Master all together. His 
 Beverence, having his Majesty's ear, moves 
 the Most Christian King to Clemency, and 
 a Boyal warrant comes down to the Made- 
 lonettes, and I was sent about my business 
 with strict injunctions not to show myself
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 241 
 
 again in Paris, under penalty of the Pillory, 
 branding on the cheek with a red-hot iron, 
 and the galleys in perpetuity. 
 
 "I had been nearly ten years abroad, 
 and having, by the charity of some Ladies 
 of the Irish Convent in Paris, found means 
 to quit France, landed one morning in the 
 year '90 at Wapping, below London. I 
 had never been in England before, and 
 mighty little I thought of it when I became 
 acquainted with that proud, belly-god coun- 
 try. I found that there was little enough 
 to be done to make a poor L'ishwoman able 
 to earn her own living ; and that there 
 was besides a prejudice against natives of 
 Ireland, both on account of their Extraction 
 and their Eeligion, which made the high 
 and mighty English unwilling to employ 
 them, either as day-labourers or as domestic 
 servants. For awhile, getting into loose 
 company, I went about the country to 
 wakes and Fairs, picking up a livelihood 
 by Eope-dancing, back and broadsword 
 fighting, and now and then sword swallow- 
 
 VOL. I. 11
 
 242 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 ing and fire eating ; but since my misad- 
 venture with the Posture Master I had 
 taken a dislike to the Mountebank life, and 
 could not settle down to it again. My old 
 love for soldiering revived again, and being 
 at Plymouth where a Eecruiting Party was 
 beating up for King William's service in 
 his Irish wars, took a convenient opportu- 
 nity of quitting my female apparel, resum- 
 ing that of a man, and listing in Lord 
 Millwood's Eegiment of Foot as a private 
 Pusilier. As I knew my drill, and made 
 no secret of my having served in the Maison 
 du Eoy, I was looked upon rather as a good 
 prize, for in war time 'tis Soldiers and 
 Soldiers only that are of real value, and 
 they may have served the very Devil him- 
 self so that they can trail a pike and cast 
 a grenade : 'tis all one to the Eecruiting 
 Captain. He wants men — not loblolly 
 boys — and so long as he gets them he cares 
 not a doit where they come from. 
 
 *' I suppose I fought as bravely as my 
 neio'hbours throu£!:hout that last Irish Cam-
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 243 
 
 paign, in which the unhappy King James 
 made so desperate an effort to regain his 
 crown. When King WilHam and the 
 Marshal Duke of Schomberg had made an 
 end of him, and the poor dethroned 
 Monarch had gotten away to St. Germains- 
 en-Laye, there to eke out the remains of 
 his days as a kind of Monk, Millwood's 
 Foot was sent back to England, and put 
 upon the Peace Establishment. That is to 
 say the officers got half pay, and the pri- 
 vate men were told that for the next 
 eighteen months they should have sixpence 
 a day, and that after that, unless another 
 war came, they must shift for themselves. 
 I preferred shifting for myself at once to 
 having any of their measly doles after 
 valiant and faithful service ; and so, having 
 gathered a very pretty penny out of Plunder 
 while with King William's army, I became 
 a woman again, and opened a Coffee House 
 and Spirit Shop at Chelsea. My curious 
 adventures had by this time come to be 
 pretty well known; and setting up at the 
 r2
 
 244 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 sign of the Amazon's Head, with a picture 
 of myself, in full fighting dress splitting 
 an Irish Eapparee with my bayonet, I grew 
 into some renown. The Quality much fre- 
 quented my house, and some of the book- 
 making gentlemen about Grub Street were 
 good enough to dish up my exploits in a 
 shilling pamphlet, called ' The Life of Eliza- 
 beth , alias James Moriarty, the new 
 
 Mar}^ Ambree, or the Grenadier/ At 
 Chelsea I remained until the year 1704, 
 but lost much by trusting the Qualitj', and 
 bad debts among the Gentlemen of the 
 Army. Besides this, I was foolish enough 
 to get married to a worthless, drunken 
 fellow, my own countryman, who had been 
 Fence Master in the Life-Guards, and he 
 very speedily ate me out of House and 
 Home, giving me continual Black Eyes, 
 besides. 
 
 " Thus, when the Great War of the Suc- 
 cession broke out, and the English ami}-, 
 commanded by the Great Duke of Marl- 
 borough, being allied with the Lnperialists
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 245 
 
 under Prince Eugene, and the forces of their 
 High Mightinesses the Dutchmen, went at 
 it Hammer and Tongs about the Spanish 
 succession with King Lewis of France, I, 
 who had always been fond of the army, 
 resolved to give up pot-walloping and take 
 another turn under canvas. It was, how- 
 ever, too late in the day for me to think of 
 again taking the part of a bold Grenadier. 
 I had become somewhat of a Character, and 
 (my old proficiency with the Sticks remain- 
 ing by me) had earned among the Gentle- 
 men of the Army the cant name of Mother 
 Drum — that by which, to my sorrow, I am 
 now known. And as Mother Drum, suttler 
 and baggage-wagon woman in the train of 
 the great John Churchill, I drank and swore, 
 and sold aquavitas, and plundered when I 
 could, and was flogged Avhen I was taken 
 in the fact (for the Provost-Marshal is no 
 respecter of sex), at Blenheim and Pamilies, 
 and Malplaquet and Oudenarde, and through- 
 out those glorious Campaigns of which I 
 could talk to you till doomsday. I came
 
 246 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 back to England at the Peace of Utrecht, 
 and set up another Tavern, and married 
 another husband, more worthless and more 
 drunken than the first one, and then 
 went bankrupt and turned washerwoman, 
 and then got into trouble about a 
 gentleman's silver-hilted Eapier, for which 
 I lay long in hold, and was sent for five 
 years to the Plantations ; and at last here I 
 am, old and fat and good for nothing, but to 
 throw to the crows as carrion — Mother 
 Drum, God save us all ! as bold as brass, and 
 as tough as leather, and ' the miserablest old 
 'oman that ever stepped.' " 
 
 This last part of her adventures I have 
 not polished up, and they are Mother 
 Drum's own.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 247 
 
 CHAPTEE THE NINTH. 
 
 THE END OF MY ADVENTURES AMONG THE BLACKS. 
 
 Were I to give vent to that Garrulity wliicli 
 grows upon us Yeterans with Gout and the 
 Gravel, and the kindred Ailments of Age, 
 this Account of my Life would never reach 
 beyond the record of Boyhood. Eor from 
 the first Flower of my freshest childhood 
 to the time that I became toward the more 
 serious Business of the World, I think I 
 could set down Day by Day, and well-nigh 
 Hour by Hour, all the things that have oc- 
 curred to me. How is it that I preserve 
 so keen a Eemembrance of a little lad's 
 joys and sorrows, when I can scarcely recal 
 how many times I have suffered Shipwreck 
 in later age, or tell how many Sansfoy Mis-
 
 248 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 creants, caring neither for Heaven or man 
 a Point, I have slain? Nay, from what 
 cause does it proceed that I, upon whom 
 the broken reliques of my Schoolmaster's 
 former Cruelty are yet Green, and who can 
 conjure up all the events that bore upon 
 my Eunning away into Charlwood Chase, 
 even to the doggish names of the Blacks, 
 their ribald talk, and the fleering of the 
 Women they had about them, find it sore 
 travail to remember what I had for dinner 
 yesterday, what friends I conversed with, 
 what Tavern I supped at, what news I read 
 in the Gazette? But 'tis the knowledge of 
 that overweening Craving to count up the 
 trivial Things of my Youth that warns me 
 to use despatch, even if the chronicle of my 
 after doings be but a short summary or 
 sketch of so many Perils by Land and Sea. 
 And for this manner of the remotest things 
 being the more distinct and dilated upon, let 
 me put it to a Man of keen vision, if whirl- 
 ing along a High Koad in a rapid carriage, 
 he has not marked, first, that the Palings
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 249 
 
 and Milestones close by have passed beneath 
 him in a confused and jarring swiftness; next, 
 that the Trees, Hedges, &c., of the middle- 
 plan (as the limners call it) have moved 
 slower and with more Deliberation, yet some- 
 what Fitfully, and encroaching on each 
 other's outlines ; whereas the extreme dis- 
 tance in Clouds, Mountains, far-off Hill- 
 sides, and the like, have seemed remote, 
 indeed, but stationary, clear, and unchange- 
 able ; so that you could count the fissures in 
 the hoar rocks, and the very sheep still feed- 
 ing on the smooth slopes, even as they fed 
 fifty years ago ? And who (let his later life 
 have been ever so fortunate) does not prefer- 
 ably dwell on that sharp prospect so clearly 
 yet so light looming through the Long 
 Avenue of years ? 
 
 It was not, I will frankly admit, a very 
 righteous beginning to a young life to be 
 hail-fellow well-met with a Gang of Deer- 
 stealers, and to go careering about the King's 
 Forest in quest of Yenison which belonged 
 to the Crown. Often have I felt remorse-
 
 250 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 ful for so having wronged his Majesty 
 (whom Heaven preserve for the safetj of 
 these distraught kingdoms) ; but what was I, 
 an' it please you, to do? Little Boy Jack 
 was just Little Boy Beggar ; and for want 
 of proper Training he became Little Boy 
 Thief. JNTot that I ever pilfered aught. I 
 was no Candle- snuffer filcher, and, save in 
 the matter of Fat Bucks, the rest of our 
 gang were, indeed, passing honest. Part of 
 the Venison we killed (mostly with a larger 
 kind of Bird-Bolt, or Arbalist Crossbow, for 
 through fear of the keepers we used as little 
 powder and ball as possible) we ate for our 
 Sustenance ; for rogues must eat and drink 
 as well as other folks. The greater portion, 
 however, was discreetly conveyed, in carts 
 covered over with garden-stuff, to the 
 market-towns of TJxbridge, Windsor, and 
 Eeading, and sold, under the coat-tail as we 
 called it, to Higglers who were in our secret. 
 Sometimes our Merchandise was taken right 
 into London, where we found a good Market 
 with the Fishmongers dwelHng about Lin-
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 251 
 
 coin's Inn, and who, as tliey did considerable 
 traffic with the Nobility and Gentry, of 
 whom they took Park Venison, giving them 
 Fish in exchange, were not likely to be sus- 
 pected of unlawful dealings, or at least were 
 able to make a colourable pretext of Honest 
 Trade to such Constables and Market Con- 
 ners who had a right to question them about 
 their barterings. From the Fishmongers we 
 took sometimes money and sometimes rich 
 apparel — the cast-off clothes, indeed, of the 
 Nobility, birthday suits or the like, which 
 were not good enough for the Players of 
 Drury Lane and Lincoln's Lm, forsooth, to 
 strut about in on their tragedy -boards, and 
 which they had therefore bestowed upon 
 their domestics to sell. For our Blacks loved 
 to quit their bewrayed apparel at supper- 
 time, and to dress themselves as bravely as 
 when I first tasted their ill-gotten meat at 
 the Stag o' Tyne. From the Higglers too, 
 we would as willingly take Wine, Strong 
 "Waters, and Tobacco, in exchange for our 
 fat and lean, as money ; for the Currency of
 
 252 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 the Eealm was then most wo fully clipped 
 and defaced, and our Brethren had a whole- 
 some avoidance of meddling with Bank Bills. 
 When, from time to time, one of us ventured 
 to a Market-town, well made-up as a decent 
 Yeoman or Merchant's Eider, 'twas always 
 payment on the Nail and in sounding money 
 for the reckoning. We ran no scores, and 
 paid in no paper. 
 
 It was long ere I found out that the 
 Wagon in which I had travelled from the 
 Hercules' Pillars, to be delivered over to 
 Grnavvbit, was conducted by one of the most 
 trusted Confederates of our Company ; that 
 he took Yenison to town for them, and 
 brought them back the Account in specie or 
 needments as they required. And although 
 I am loth to think that the pretty Servant 
 Maid was altogether deceiving me when she 
 told me she was going to see her Grand- 
 mother, I fancy that she knew Charlwood 
 Chase, and the gentr}^ that inhabited it, as 
 well as she knew the Pewterer in Panyer 
 Alley. He went a-pewtering no more, if
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 253 
 
 ever he liad been 'prentice or done journey- 
 work for that trade, but was neither more 
 nor less than one of the Blacks, and Mis- 
 tress Slyboots, his Flame, kept him com- 
 pany. Although I hope, I am sure, that 
 they were Married by the Chaplain ; for, 
 rough as I am, I had ever a Hatred of Un- 
 lawful Passions, and when I am summoned 
 on a Jury, always listen to the King's Pro- 
 clamation against Yice and Immorality with 
 much gusto and savour. 
 
 I stayed with the Blacks in Charlwood 
 Chase until I grew to be a sturdy lad of 
 twelve years of age. I went out with them 
 and followed their nauglity courses, and 
 have stricken down many a fat Buck in 
 my time. Ours was the most jovial but the 
 most perilous of lives. The Keepers were 
 always on our track ; and sometimes the 
 Sheriff would call out the Posse Comitatis, 
 and he and half the beef-fed tenant-farmers 
 of the country-side would come horsing and 
 hoofing it about the glades to catch us. For 
 weeks together in each year we dared not
 
 254 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 keep our rendezvous at the Stag, but were 
 fain to hide in Brakes and Hollow Trees, 
 listening to the pursuit as it grew hot and 
 heavy around us ; and often with no better 
 Yictuals than Pig's-meat and Ditch-water. 
 But then the search would begin to lag ; 
 and two or three of the great Squires round 
 about being well terrified by letters written 
 in a liquid designed to counterfeit Blood, 
 with a great Skull and Cross-bones scrawled 
 at the bottom, the whole signed " Captain 
 Night," and telling them that if they dared 
 to meddle with the Blacks their Lives should 
 pay for it, we were left quiet for a season, 
 and could return to our Haunt, there to 
 feast and carouse according to custom, isov 
 am I slow to believe that some of the tole- 
 rance we met with was due to our being 
 known to the County Gentry as stanch 
 Tories, and as stanch detesters of the House 
 of Hanover (I speak, of course, of my com- 
 panions, for I was of years too tender to 
 have any politics). We never killed a Deer 
 but on the nearest tree some one of us out
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 255 
 
 with his Jack-knife and carved on the bark 
 of it, "Slain by King James's order;" or, if 
 there were no time for so long a legend, or 
 the Beast was stricken in the Open, a simple 
 K. J. (which the Hanover Eats understood 
 well enough, whether cut in the trunk or 
 the turf) sufficed. The Country Gentlemen 
 were then of a very furious way of thinking 
 concerning the rights of the present Illus- 
 trious House to the Throne ; but Times do 
 alter, and so likewise do Men's Thousrhts 
 and Opinions, and I dare swear there is no 
 Brunswicker or Church of England man 
 more leal at this present writing than John 
 Dangerous. 
 
 Captain Night, to whom I was a kind of 
 Page or Henchman, used me with much 
 tenderness. Whenever at supper the tongues 
 grew too loosened, and wild talk, and of the 
 wickedese, began to jingle among the bottles 
 and glasses, he would bid me Withdraw, 
 and go keep company for a time with Mis- 
 tress Slyboots. Captain Night was a man 
 of parts and even of letters; and I often
 
 256 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 wondered why he, who seemed so well fitted 
 to Shine even among the Grreat, should pass 
 his time among Eogues, and take the thing 
 that was not his. He was often absent from 
 ns for many days, sometimes for nigh a 
 month ; and would return sunburnt and 
 travel-stained, as though he had been jour- 
 neying in Foreign Parts. He was always 
 very thoughtful and reserved after these 
 Gaddings about ; and Mistress Slyboots, the 
 Maid, used to say that he was in Love, and 
 had been playing the gallant to some fine 
 Madam. But I thought otherwise : for at 
 this season it was his custom to bring ba(;k 
 a Yalise full to the very brim of letters and 
 papers, the which he would take Days to 
 read and re-read, noting and seeminglj^ 
 copying some, but burning the greater por- 
 tion. At this season he would refrain from 
 joining the Gang, and honourably forswore 
 his share of their plunder, always giving 
 Mother Drum a broad piece for each night's 
 Supper, Bottle, and Bed. But when his 
 pressing business was over, no man was
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 257 
 
 keener in tlie cliase, or brought down the 
 quarry so skilfully as Captain Night. He 
 loved to have me with him, to talk to and 
 Question me ; and it was one day, after I 
 had told him that the Initial letter D was 
 the only clue to my Grandmother's name, 
 w^hich I had seen graven on her Cofhn-plate, 
 he must needs tell me that if she were Ma- 
 dam (or rather Lady) 1) , I must needs, 
 
 as a Kinsman, be D too, and that he 
 
 would piece out the name, and call me Dan- 
 gerous. So that I was Little Boy Jack no 
 more, and John Dangerous I have been 
 from that day to this. Not but what my 
 Ancestry and Belongings might warrant me 
 in assuming another title, than which — so 
 far as lineage counts — Bourbon or Nassau 
 €Ould not rank much higher. But the name 
 of Dangerous has pleased me alway ; it has 
 stood me in stead in many a hard pass, and 
 I am content to abide by it now that my 
 locks are gray, and the walls of this my 
 battered old tenement are crumbling into 
 decay. 
 
 VOL. I. s
 
 258 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 'Twas I alone that was privileged to stay 
 with Captain Night when he was doing 
 Secretary's work among his papers ; for, 
 save when Mistress Slyboots came np to 
 him — discreetly tapping at the door first, 
 yon may be sure — with a cup of ale and a 
 toast, he would abide no other company. 
 And on such days I wore not my Black 
 Disguisement, but the better clothes he had 
 provided for me, — a little Eiding Suit of red 
 drugget, silver-laced, and a cock to my hat 
 like a Military Officer, — and felt myself as 
 grand as you please. I never dared speak 
 to him until he spoke to me ; but used to 
 sit quietly enough sharpening bolts or twist- 
 ing bowstrings, or cleaning his Pistols, or 
 furbishing up his Hanger and Belt, or such- 
 like boyish pastime-labour. He was careful 
 to burn every paper that he Discarded after 
 taking it from the Yalise ; but once, and 
 once only, a scrap remained unconsumed on 
 the hearth, the which, with my ape-like 
 curiosity of half-a- score summers, I must 
 needs spell over, although I got small good
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 259 
 
 therefrom. 'Twas but the top of a letter, 
 and all the writing I conld make out ran, 
 " St. Germains, August the twelfth. 
 
 " My dear" 
 
 and here it broke off, and baffled me. 
 
 Whenever Captain Night went a hunting, 
 I attended upon him ; but when he was 
 away, I was confided to the care of Jowler, 
 who, albeit much given to babble in his 
 liquor, was about the most discreet (the 
 Chaplain always excepted) among the Gang. 
 In the dead season, when Yenison was not 
 to be had, or was nothing worth for the 
 Market if it had been killed, we lived 
 mostly on dried meats and cured salmon ; 
 the first prepared by Mother Drum and her 
 maid, the last furnished us by our good 
 friends and Chapmen the Fishmongers 
 about Lincoln's Inn. And during this same 
 Dead Season, I am glad to say that my 
 Master did not sufier me to remain idle ; 
 but, besides taking some pains in tutoring 
 me himself, moved our Chaplain, all of 
 whose humane letters had not been washed 
 s2
 
 2G0 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 out by burnt Brandy or fumed out by 
 Tobacco (to the use of which he was im- 
 moderately given), to put me through a 
 course of daily instruction. I had had some 
 Latin beaten into me by Gnawbit, when he 
 had nothins: of more moment to bestir him- 
 self about, and had attained a decent pro- 
 ficiency in reading and writing. Under 
 the Chaplain of the Blacks, who swore at 
 me grievously, but never, under the direst 
 forbidding, laid finger on me, I became a 
 current scholar enougli of my own tongue, 
 with just such a little smattering of the 
 Latin as helped me at a pinch in some of 
 the Secret Dealings of my later career. But 
 Salt Water has done its work upon my 
 Lily's Grammar ; and although I yield to 
 no man in the Faculty of saying what I 
 mean, ay, and of writing it down in good 
 plain English ('tis true that of your nomi- 
 natives and genitives and stuff, I know 
 nothing), I question if I could toll 
 you the Latin for a pair of riding- 
 boots.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 261 
 
 There was a paltry parcel of books at 
 the Stag o' Tyne, and these I read over and 
 over again at my leisure. There was a 
 History of the Persecutions undergone by 
 the Quakers, and Bishop Sprat's Narrative 
 of the Conspiracy of Blackhead and the 
 others a«;ainst him. There was Foxe's 
 Martyrs, and God's Bevenge against Mur- 
 der (a very grim tome), and Mr. Daniel 
 Defoe's Life of Moll Flanders, and Colonel 
 Jack. These, with two or three Play -books, 
 and a Novel of Mrs. Aphra Belin (very 
 scurrilous), a few Ballads, and some ridi- 
 culous Chap-books about Knights and 
 Fairies and Dragons, made up the tattered 
 and torn library of our house in Charlwood 
 Chase. 'Twas good enough, you may say, for 
 a nest of Deerstealers. Well, there might 
 have been a worse one ; but these, I can 
 aver, with English and Foreign newspapers 
 and letters, and my Bible in later life, have 
 been all the reading that John Dangerous 
 can boast of. Which makes me so mad 
 against your fine Scholars and ScHbblors,
 
 262 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 who, because they can turn verse and make 
 Te-to-tum into Greek, must needs sneer at 
 me at the Coffee House, and make a butt 
 of an honest man who has been from one 
 end of the world to the other, and has 
 fought his way through it to Fortune and 
 Honour. 
 
 I was in the twelfth year of my age, 
 when a great change overtook me in my 
 career. Moved, as it would seem, to ex- 
 ceeding Anger and implacable Disgust by 
 the carryings-on of Captain Night and his 
 merry men in Charhvood Chase, the King's 
 Ministers put forth a Proclamation against 
 us, promising heavy Blood ]\Ioney to any 
 who would deliver us, or any one member 
 of the Grang, into the hands of Authority. 
 This Proclamation came at first to little. 
 There was no sending a troop of horse 
 into the Chase, and the husbandmen of the 
 country-side were too good Friends of ours 
 to play the Judas. We were not Highway 
 Bobbers. Not one of our band had ever 
 taken to or been taken from the Poad.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 263 
 
 Eascals of the Cartouclie and Macheatli 
 kidney we Disdained. We were neither 
 Foot-pads nor Cut-purses, nay, nor Smug- 
 glers nor Eick-hurners. We were only 
 Unfortunate Gentlemen, who much did 
 need, and who had suffered much for our 
 politics and our religion, and had no other 
 means of earning a livelihood than by kill- 
 ing the King's Deer. Those peasants whom 
 we came across Feared us, indeed, as they 
 would the very Fiend, but bore us no ma- 
 lice ; for we always treated them with civi- 
 lity, and not rarely gave them the Umbles 
 and other inferior parts of the Deer, against 
 their poor Christenings and Lyings -in. 
 And through these means, and some small 
 money presents our Captain would make 
 to their wives and callow brats, it came to 
 pass that Mother Drum had seldom cause 
 to brew aught but the smallest beer for 
 morning Drinking ; for though we had to 
 pay for our Wine and Ardent Drinks, the 
 cellar of the Stag o' Tyne was always hand- 
 somely furnished with barrels of strong ale.
 
 264 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 which Lobbin Clout or Colin Mayfly, the 
 Hind or the Plough-churl, would bring us 
 secretly by night in their ^Yains for grati- 
 tude. I know not where they got the malt 
 from, but there was narrow a fault to find 
 with the Brew. I recollect its savour now 
 with a sweet tooth, condemned as I am to 
 the inky Hogs-wash which the Londoners 
 call Porter ; and indeed it is fit for Porters 
 to drink, but not for Gentlemen. These 
 Peasants used to tremble all over with 
 terror when they came to the Stag o' Tyne ; 
 but they were always hospitably made wel- 
 come, and sent away with full gizzards, ay, 
 and with full heads too, and by potions to 
 which the louts were but little used. 
 
 We had no fear of treachery from these 
 Chawbacons, but we had Enemies in the 
 Chase nevertheless. Here dwelt a vagabond 
 tribe of Bastard Verderers and Charcoal- 
 burners, savage, ignorant, brutish AYretches, 
 as superstitious as the Manilla Creoles. 
 They were one-half gipsies, and one half, or 
 perhaps a quarter, trade-fallen whippers-in
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 265 
 
 and keepers that had been stripped of their 
 livery. They picked up their sorry crust 
 by burning of charcoal, and carting of dead 
 wood to farmers for to consume in their 
 ingles. Now and again, when any of the 
 Quality came to hunt in the Chase, the 
 Head Keeper would make use of a score or 
 so of them as beaters and rabble-prickers of 
 the game ; but nine months out of the 
 twelve they rather starved than lived. These 
 Charcoal-burners hated us Blacks, first, be- 
 cause in our sable disguise we rather imitated 
 their own Beastly appearance — for the varlets 
 never washed from Candlemas to Shrove- 
 tide; next, because we were Gentlemen; 
 and lastly, because we would not suffer them 
 to catch Deer for themselves in pitfalls and 
 springes. Nay, a True Gentleman Black 
 meeting a " Coaley," as we called the char- 
 coal fellows, with so much as a hare, a 
 rabbit, or a pheasant with him, let alone 
 venison, would ofttimes give him a sackful 
 of sore bones to carry as well as a game- 
 bag. No "Coaley" was ever let to slake
 
 266 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 his thirst at the Stag o' Tyne. The poor 
 wretches had a miserable hovel of an inn 
 to their own part on the western outskirts 
 of the Chase, a place by the sign of the 
 Hand and Hatchet, where they ate tKeir rye- 
 bread and drank their sour Clink, when they 
 could muster coppers enough for a two- 
 penny carouse. 
 
 This Proclamation, of \vhicli at first we 
 made light, was speedily followed by a real 
 live Act of Parliament, which is yet, I have 
 been told, Law, and is known as the " Black 
 Act."* The most dreadful punishments were 
 denounced against us by the Houses of Lords 
 and Commons, and the Blood Money was 
 doubled. One of the most noted Thief- 
 takers of that day — almost as great a one as 
 Jonathan Wild — comes down post, and sets 
 
 * See the Statutes at Large. The Black Act was 
 repealed mainly through the exertions of Sir James 
 Macintosh, early in the present century. Under its 
 clauses the going about " disguised or blackened in 
 pursuit of game " was made felony without benefit of 
 clergy ; the punishment thereof death. — Ed.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 267 
 
 up his Standard at Eeading, as though he 
 had been King William on the banks of the 
 Boyne. With him he brings a mangy Eout 
 of Constables and Bailiff's Followers, and 
 other kennel-ranging vagabonds ; and now 
 nothing must serve him but to beg of the 
 Commanding Officer at Windsor (my Lord 
 Treherne) for a loan of two companies of the 
 Foot Guards, who, nothing loth for iield- 
 sport and extra pay, were placed, with their 
 captain and all — more shame for a Gentleman 
 to mix in such Hangman's work ! — under 
 Mr. Thief-taker's orders. He and his Ban- 
 dogs, ay, and his Grenadiers, might have 
 hunted us through Charlwood Chase until 
 Doomsday but for the treachery of the 
 " Coaleys." 'Twas one of their number, — 
 named, or rather nicknamed, " the Beau," 
 because he washed his face on Sunday, and 
 was therefore held to be of the first fashion, 
 — who earned eighty pounds by revealing 
 the hour when the whole Gang of Blacks 
 might be pounced upon at the Stag o' Tyne. 
 The infamous wretch goes to Aylesbury, —
 
 26S THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 for our part of tlie Chase was in the county 
 of Bucks, — and my Thief-taking gentleman 
 from Eeading meets him — a pretty couple ; 
 and he makes oath before Mr. Justice Crib- 
 fee (who should have set him in the Stocks, 
 or delivered him over to the Beadle for a 
 vagrant) ; and after a fine to-do of Sheriff's 
 business and swearing in of special con- 
 stables, the end of it was, that a whole 
 Rout of them, Sheriff, Javelin-men, and 
 Headboroughs and all, with the Grenadiers 
 at their back, came upon us unawares one 
 moonlight night as we were merrily supping 
 at the Stag. 
 
 'Tvvas no use showing Fight perhaps, for 
 we were undermanned, some of us being 
 awa}^ on the scent, for we suspected some 
 foul play. The constables and other clod- 
 hopping Alguazils were all armed to the 
 teeth with Bills and Blunderbusses, Pistols 
 and Hangers ; but had they worn all the 
 weapons in the H(U'se Armoury in the 
 Tower, it would not have saved them from 
 shivering in their shoes when " Hard and
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 269 
 
 sharp " was the word, and an encounter with 
 the terrible Blacks had to be endured. We 
 should have made mince-meat of them all, 
 and perhaps hanged up one or two of them 
 outside the inn as an extra signpost. But 
 we were not only unarmed, we were over- 
 matched, my hearties. There were the Eed- 
 coats, burn them ! How many times in my 
 life have I been foiled and baffled by those 
 miscreated men- machines in scarlet blanket- 
 ing ! No use in a stout Heart, no use in a 
 strong Hand, no use in a sharp Sword, or a 
 pair of barkers with teeth that never fail, 
 when you have to do with a Soldier. Do ! 
 What are you to do with him ? There he is, 
 with his shaven face and his hair powdered, 
 as if he were going to a fourpenny fandango 
 at Bagnigge Wells. There he is, as obstinate 
 as a Pig, and as firm as a Eock, with his 
 confounded bright firelock, bayonet, and 
 crossbelts. There he is, immoveable and 
 unconquerable, defying the boldest of 
 Smugglers, the bravest of Gentlemen Eovers, 
 and, by the Lord Harry, lie eats you tfjo.
 
 270 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OP 
 
 Always give the Eedcoats a wide berth, my 
 dear, and the Grenadiers more than all. 
 
 Unequal as were the odds, with all tliese 
 Eoaring Dragons in scarlet baize on our 
 trail, we had still a most desperate fight for 
 it. While the mob of Constables kept 
 cowering in the bar-room down-stairs, crying 
 out to us to surrender in the King's name, 
 — I believe that one poor creature, the 
 Justice of Peace, after getting himself well 
 walled up in a corner w^itli chairs and tables, 
 began to quaver out the King's Proclamation 
 against the Blacks, — the plaguy Soldiers 
 came blundering up both pair of stairs, and 
 fell upon us Billy Boys tooth and nail. 
 'Slid ! my blood simmers when I think of 
 it. Over went the tables and settles ! Smash 
 went trenchers and cups and glasses ! CHnk- 
 a-clink went sword-blades and bayonets ! 
 " And don't fire, my lads !" cries out the 
 Soldier- officer to his Grannies. " We want 
 all these rogues to hang up at Aylesbury 
 Gaol." 
 
 " Eogue yourself, and back to your
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 271 
 
 • 
 
 Mother !" cries Captain Night, very pale ; 
 but I never saw him look Bolder or Hand- 
 somer. " Eogue in your Tripes, you Han- 
 over Eat !" and he shortens his sword and 
 rushes on the Soldier- officer. 
 
 The Grenadier Captain was brave enough, 
 but he was but a smockfaced lad fresh from 
 the Mall and St. James's Gruard-room, and 
 he had no chance against a steady practised 
 Swordsman and Forest Blood, as Captain 
 Night was. We all thought he would make 
 short work of the Soldier-officer. He had 
 him in a corner, and the Chaplain, a-top of 
 whom was a Grenadier trying to throttle or 
 capture him, or both, exclaims, " Give him 
 the grace-blow, my dear ; give it him under 
 the fifth rib !" when Captain Night cries, 
 " Go home to your mother. Milksop !" and 
 he catches his own sword by the hilt, hits 
 his Enemy a blow on the right Avrist enough 
 to numb it for a month, twists his fingers in 
 his cravat, flings him on one side, and right 
 into the middle of a punch-bowl, and then, 
 upon my word, he himself jumps out of
 
 272* THE stranctE adventures of 
 
 • 
 
 Window, shouting out, "Follow me, little 
 Jack Dangerous !'* 
 
 I wished for nothing better, and had 
 already my leg on the sill, when two great 
 hulking Grenadiers seized hold of me. 'Twas 
 then, for the first time, that I earned a just 
 claim and title to the name of Dangerous ; 
 for a little dirk I was armed with being 
 wrested from me by Soldier number one, 
 who eggs on his comrade to collar the young 
 Fox-cub, as he calls me, I seize a lieavy 
 Stone Demijohn full of brandy, and sraavsh 
 it eoes on the head of Soldier number two. 
 He falls with a dismal groan, the blood and 
 brandy running in equal measure from his 
 head, and the first Soldier runs his bayonet 
 through me. 
 
 Luckily, 'twas but a flesh-wound in the 
 flank, and no vital part was touched. It 
 was enough for me, however, poor Urchin, 
 — enougli to make me tumble down in a 
 dead fiiint ; and when I came to myself, I 
 found that I had been removed to the bar- 
 room down-stairs, where I made one of
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 273 
 
 nineteen Blacks, all prisoners to tlie King 
 for stealing liis Deer, and all bound liand 
 and foot with Eopes. 
 
 " Never mind their hurting your wrists, 
 young Hempseed," chuckled one of the 
 scaldpated constable rogues who was guard- 
 ing us. "You'll have enough to tighten 
 your gullet after 'Sizes, as sure as eggs is 
 eggs." 
 
 "Nay, brother Grimstock, the elf's too 
 young to be hanged," puts in another 
 constable, with somewhat of a charitable 
 visage." 
 
 " Too young !" echoes he addressed as 
 Grimstock. " 'Twas bred in the bone in 
 hiin, the varmint, and the Gallows Fever 
 will come out in the flesh. Too young ! he 
 was weaned on rue, and rode between his 
 Father's legs (that swung) i' the cart to Ty- 
 burn, and never sailed a cockboat but in 
 Execution Dock. My tobacco-box to a 
 tester an' he dance not on nothing if 
 he comes to holding up his hand before 
 Judge Blackcap, that never spared but 
 
 VOL. I. T
 
 274 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 one in the Calendar, and then 'twas by Mis- 
 take/' 
 
 These were not very comfortable news 
 for me, poor manacled wretch ; and with a 
 great bayonet-wound in my side to boot, 
 that had been but clumsily dressed by a 
 village Leech, who was, I suspect, a Farrier 
 and Cow Doctor as well. But I have 
 always found, in this life's whirligig, that 
 when your Case is at the worst (unless a 
 Man indeed Dies, when there is nothing 
 more to be done), it is pretty sure to mend, 
 if you lie quiet and let things take their 
 chance. I could not be much worse off 
 than I was, wounded and friendless, and a 
 captive ; and so I held my tongue, and let 
 them use me as they would. Some scant 
 comfort was it, however, to find, when the 
 battle-field was gone over, that, besides the 
 Grrenadier whose crown I had cracked, 
 another had been pistolled by Jowler, and 
 and lay mortally wounded, and Groaning 
 Dismally. Poor Jowler himself would 
 never pistol Foe more. He was dead ; for
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 275 
 
 the Men of War, furious at our desperate 
 Eesistance, at the worsting of their fine- 
 feathered ofiicer (who was mumbling of his 
 bruised hand as a down-trodden Hound 
 would its paw, and cursing meanwhile, 
 which Dogs use not to do), and driven to 
 Mad Eage by the escape of Captain Night, 
 had fired pell-mell into a Group of which 
 Jowler made one, and so killed him. A bullet 
 through his brain set him clean quit of all 
 indictments under the Black Act, before our 
 Sovereign Lord the King. Likewise was it 
 a matter of rejoicing for our party that, 
 after long seeking the Traitor Coaley, the 
 wretched " Beau" was found duly strangled, 
 and completely a corpse on the staircase. 
 There was something curious about the 
 manner of justice coming to this villain. 
 The Deed had been done with no weapon 
 more Lethal than an old Stocking ; yet so 
 tightly was it tied round his false neck, that 
 it had to be cut ofi" piecemeal, and even then 
 the ribs of the worsted were found to be 
 Imbedded, and to have made Furrows in 
 T 2
 
 276 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OP 
 
 his flesh. Now it is certain that we Blacks 
 had not laid about us with old "Wives' hose, 
 any more than we had lunged at our ene- 
 mies with knitting-needles. There, how- 
 ever, was Monsieur Judas, as dead as a 
 Dolphin two hours on deck. Lord, what 
 an ugly countenance had the losel when 
 they came to wash the charcoal off him ! 
 As to who had forestalled the Hangman in 
 his office, no certain testimony could be 
 given. I have always found at Sea, when 
 any doubts arise as to the why and the 
 wherefore of a gentleman's death, that the 
 best way to settle accounts is to fling him 
 overboard; but on dry land your plaguy 
 Dead Body is a sore Stumbling Block and 
 Impediment, always turning up when it is 
 not Wanted, and bringing other Gentlemen 
 into all kinds of trouble. Crowner's Quest 
 was held on the " Beau ;" and I only won- 
 der that they did not bring it in murder 
 against Me. The jury sat a long time with- 
 out making up their minds, till the Parish 
 constable ordered them in a bowl of Flip,
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 277 
 
 upon which they proceeded to bring in a 
 verdict of Wilful Murder against some per- 
 son or persons unknown. I can scarcely, to 
 this day, bring myself to suspect my pretty 
 maid, that should have married the Pew- 
 terer, of such a bold Act, and the rather 
 believe that it was the girl Grip and her 
 Mistress that worked off the Spy and 
 Traitor between them. Not that Mother 
 Drum would have needed any assistance in. 
 the mere doing of the thing. She was a 
 Mutton-fisted woman, and as strong in the 
 forearm as a Bridewell correctioner. , 
 
 Oh, the dreary journey we made that 
 morning to Aylesbury I The Men Blacks 
 were tied back to back, and thrown into 
 such carts as could be pressed into the ser- 
 vice from the farmsteads on the skirts of the 
 Chase. One of the constables must needs 
 offer, the Scoundrel, to take horse and go 
 borrow a cartload of fetters from the gaoler 
 at Reading; but he was overruled, and 
 Eopes were thought strong enough to con- 
 fine us. There was no chance, alas ! of any
 
 278 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 rescue ; for those of our comrades who had 
 been fortunate enough through absence to 
 avoid capture, had doubtless by this time 
 scent of the Soldiers, and there was no 
 kicking against those bright Firelocks and 
 Bayonets. Yet had there been another 
 escape. Cicely Grip and Mother Drum 
 were taken, but the pretty maid I loved so 
 for her kindness to me when I was Forlorn 
 had shown a clean pair of heels, and was 
 nowhere to be found. Good luck to her, 
 I thought. Perchance she has met with 
 Captain Night, and they are Safe and Sound 
 by this time, and off to Foreign Parts. For 
 in all this I declare I saw nothing Wrong, 
 and held, in my baby logic, that we Blacks 
 had all been very harshly entreated by the 
 Constables and Eedcoats, and that it was a 
 shame to use us so. Mother Drum, the 
 "Wench, and my poor wounded Self, were 
 put into one cart together, and through 
 Humanity, a Sergeant (for the Constables 
 would not have done it) bade his men litter 
 down some straw for us to lie upon. There
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 279 
 
 was a ragged Tilt too over the cart ; and 
 thinks I, in a Gruesome manner, " The first 
 time you rode on straw under a Tilt, Jack, 
 you were going to school, and now, 'ifegs, 
 you are going to be Hanged." For it was 
 settled on all sides, and even he with the 
 Charitable Countenance came to be of that 
 mind at last, that my fate was to die by the 
 Cord. 
 
 "Why," says one, "you've half-brained 
 Corporal Foss with the Demijohn; never 
 did liquor get into a pretty man's head so 
 soon and so deep. They'll stretch your 
 neck for this, my poult, — they will." 
 
 The Sergeant interposing, said that per- 
 haps, if interest were made for me, I might 
 be spared an Indictment, and let to go 
 and serve the King as a Drummer till I 
 was old enough to carry a firelock. But 
 at this the soldiers shook their heads; for 
 Captain Popping] ay, their officer, was, it 
 seems, still in a towering rage at having 
 had his fine-lady's hand so wofully mauled 
 by Captain Night, and vowed vengeance
 
 2 so THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 against the whole crew of poachers and 
 then- whelp, as he must needs be Polite 
 enough to call me. 
 
 This Fine Gentleman had been provided 
 v/ith a Horse by the Sheriff, and, as he 
 rode by the cart \yhere I and Drum and 
 the Girl were jogging on, he spies me 
 under the Tilt, and in his cruel manner 
 makes a cut at me with his ridino- wand, 
 calling me a young spawn of Thievery and 
 Eebellion. 
 
 '' You coward," I cried in a passion ; 
 " you daren't a' done that if my hands were 
 loose, and I hadn't this baggonet-wound 
 in me." 
 
 '' Shame to hit the boy," growled the 
 charitable Constable, who was on horse- 
 back too. 
 
 The Soldier-officer turned round quickly 
 to see who had spoken; but the Sergeant, 
 who watched him, pointed with his hal- 
 bert to the Constable, and he returned the 
 Captain's glance with a sturdy mien. So 
 my Fine Gentleman reins in his beast and
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 281 
 
 lets US pass, eyeing his hand, which was 
 all wrapped up in Bandages, and mutter- 
 ing that it was well none of his own fellows 
 had given him this sauciness. 
 
 The da}^ was a dreadful one. How 
 many times our train halted to bait I 
 knov/ not ; but this I know, that I fainted 
 often from Agony of my wound and the 
 uneasy motion of my carriage. It is a 
 wonder that I ever came to my journey's 
 end alive, and in all likelihood never 
 should, but for the unceasing care and 
 solicitude of the two poor women who 
 were with me. Prisoners like myself, but 
 full of merciful kindness for one who was 
 in a sorer strait than they. By earnest 
 pleading did Mother Drum persuade the 
 Head Constable — who, the nearer we got 
 to gaol the more authority he took, and 
 the less he seemed to think of our soldier 
 escort — to allow her hands to be unbound 
 that she might minister unto me ; and also 
 did she obtain so much grace as for some 
 of the Money belonging unto her, and
 
 282 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 which had been seized at the Stag o' Tjne, 
 to be spent in buying of a bottle of brandy 
 at one of our halting-places, with which 
 she not only comforted herself and her 
 afflicted Maid, but, mingling it with water, 
 cooled my parched tongue and bathed my 
 forehead. 
 
 Brandy was the only medicament this 
 good soul knew ; and more lives she averred, 
 had been saved by Eight Nantz than lost 
 by bad B. W. ; but still brandy was not 
 precisely the kind of physic to give a 
 Patient who before Sundown was in a 
 Eaging Fever. But 'twas all one to the 
 Law; and coming at last to my journey's 
 end, we were all, the wounded and the 
 whole, flung into Gaol to answer for it 
 at the 'Sizes.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 283 
 
 CHAPTER THE TENTH. 
 
 I AM VERY NEAR BEING HANGED. 
 
 Our prison was surely the most loathsome 
 hole that Human beings were ever im- 
 mured in. It was a Horrible and Shameful 
 Place, conspicuous for such even in those 
 days, when every prison was a place of 
 Horror and Shame. 'Twas one of the 
 King's Prisons, — one of His Majesty's 
 Graols, — the county had nothing to do with 
 it; and the Keeper thereof was a Woman. 
 Say a Tigress rather ; but Mrs. Macphilader 
 wore a hoop and lappets and gold ear-rings, 
 and was dubbed "Madam" by her Under- 
 lings. Here you might at any time have 
 seen poor Wretches chained to the floor of 
 reeking dungeons, their arms, legs, necks
 
 284 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 even, laden with irons, themselves abused, 
 beaten, jeered at, drenched with pailfuls of 
 foul water, and more than three-quarter 
 starved, merely for not being able to pay 
 Garnish to the Gaoleress, or comply with 
 other her exorbitant demands. Fetters, 
 indeed, were common and Fashionable 
 Wear in the Graol. 'Twas pleaded that 
 the walls of the prison were so rotten 
 throuorh asre, and the means of sruardins: 
 the prisoners — for they could not be always 
 calling in the Grenadiers — so limited, that 
 they must needs put the poor creatures in 
 the bilboes, or run the chance of their 
 escaping every day in the week. Thus it 
 came to pass, even, that they were tried 
 in Fetters, and sometimes could not hold 
 up their hands (weakened besides by the 
 Gaol Distemper), at the bidding of the 
 Clerk of the. Arraigns, for the weight of 
 the Manacles that were upon them. And 
 it is to the famous and admirable Mr. John 
 Howard that we owe the putting down of 
 this last Abomination.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 2S5 
 
 We lay so long in this dreadful place 
 before a Gaol Delivery was made, that my 
 wound, had as it was, had ample time to 
 heal, leaving only a great indented cicatrix, 
 as though some Giant had forced his finger 
 into my flesh, and of which I shall never he 
 rid. Two more of our gang died of the Gaol 
 Fever before Assize time ; one was so for- 
 tunate as to break prison, file the irons ofi* 
 his legs, and get clear away ; and another 
 (who was always of a Melancholy turn) 
 hanged himself one morning, in a halter 
 made from strips of his blanket knotted 
 together. The rest of us were knocked about 
 by the Turnkeys, or abused by the Gaoleress, 
 Mrs. Macphilader, pretty much as they liked. 
 We were, however, not so badly ofi* as some 
 of the poor prisoners — sheep-stealers, foot- 
 pads, vagrom men and women, and the like, 
 or even as some of tlie poor Debtors — many 
 of whom lay here incarcerate years after they 
 had discharged the Demands of their 
 Creditors against them, and only because 
 they could not pay their Fees. We Blacks
 
 286 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 were always well supplied witli money ; and 
 money conld purchase almost any thing in a 
 prison in those days. Eoast meats, and wine 
 and beer and punch, pipes and tobacco, and 
 playing cards and song-books, — all these 
 were to be had by Gentlemen Prisoners ; the 
 Gaoleress taking a heavy toll, and making a 
 mighty profit from all these luxurious things. 
 But there was one thing that money could not 
 buy, namely, cleanly lodging ; for the State 
 Boom, a hole of a place, very meanly fur- 
 nished, where your great Smugglers or 
 ruffling Highwaymen were sometimes lodged, 
 at a guinea a day for their accommodation, was 
 only so much better from the common room 
 in so far as the prisoner had bed and board 
 to himself; but for nastiness and creeping 
 things — which I wonder, so numerous were 
 they, did not crawl away with the whole 
 prison bodily : but 'tis hard to lind those 
 that are unanimous, even vermin. — For all 
 that made the Gaol most thoroughly hateful 
 and dreadful, there was not a pin to clioose 
 between the State Eoom, the Common Side,
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 287 
 
 and the Eat's Larder, Clink, or Dark Dun- 
 geon, where the Poor were confined in wan- 
 tonness, and the Stubborn were kept some- 
 times for punishment ; for Madam Gaoleress 
 had a will of her own, and would brook no 
 incivilities from her Lodgers ; so sure is it, 
 that falling out one day on the disputed 
 Question of a bottle of Aquavitse on which 
 toll had not been paid, she calls one of the 
 Turnkeys and bids him clap Mother Drum 
 into the Stocks (that stood in the Prison 
 Yard) for an hour or two, for the cooling of 
 her temper. But this had just the contrary 
 effect ; for the whilom Hostess of the Stag o' 
 Tyne, enraged at the Indignity offered to 
 her, did so bemaul and bewray Madam Mac- 
 philader with her tongue, shaking Iier fist 
 at her meanwhile, that the Graoleress in a 
 fury clawed at least two handfuls of M. 
 Drum's hair from her head, not without 
 getting some smart clapperclawing in the 
 face; whereupon she cries out "Murther" 
 and " Mutiny " and " Prisonrupt," and sends 
 post-haste for Justice Palmworm, her gossip
 
 288 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 indeed, and one of tliose trading magistrates 
 that so disgraced our bench before Mr. 
 Henry Fielding the writer stirred up 
 Authority to put some order therein. The 
 Justice comes ; and he and the Gaoleress, 
 after cracking a bottle of mulled port between 
 them, poor Mother Drum was brought up 
 before his Worship for mutinous conduct. 
 The Justice would willingly have com- 
 pounded the case, for Lucre was his only 
 love ; but 'twas vengeance the Gaoleress 
 hankered after ; and the end of it was that 
 poor Mother Drum was triced up at the post 
 that was by the Stocks, and had a dozen and 
 a half from a cat with indeed but three tails, 
 but that, I warrant, hurt pretty nigh as 
 sharply as nine would have done in weaker 
 hands ; for 'twas the Gaoleress that played 
 the Beadle and laid on the Scourge. 
 
 At length, when I w^as quite tired out, 
 and, knowing nothing of the course of Law, 
 began to think that we were doomed to per- 
 petual Imprisonment, His Majesty's Judges 
 of Assize came upon their circuit, and those
 
 CAPTAIN DANGKROUS. 289 
 
 wliom the Fever and Want and tlie Duresse 
 of their Keeper had spared were put upon 
 their trial. By this time I was thoug-lit well 
 enough, though as gaunt as a Hound, to he 
 put in the same Gaol-hird's trim as my com- 
 panions ; so a pair of Woman's fetters — ay, 
 my friends, the women wore fetters in those 
 days — were put upon me ; and the whole 
 of us, all shackled as we were, found our- 
 selves, one fine Monday morning, in the 
 Dock, having heen driven thereinto very 
 much after the flishion of a flock of sheep. 
 The Court was crowded, for the case against 
 the Blacks had made a prodigious stir ; and 
 the King's Attorney, the most furious Person 
 for talking a Fellow-creature's Life away that 
 ever I rememher to have seen or heard, came 
 d.ovvn especially from London to prosecute 
 us. Neither he nor His Lordship the Judge, 
 in his charge to the Grand Jury, had any 
 but the worst of words to give us ; and folks 
 began to say that this would be another 
 Bloody Assize ; that the Shire Hall had need 
 to be hung with scarlet, as when Jeffreys was 
 
 VOL. I. u
 
 290 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 on the bench ; and that as short work would 
 be made of us as of the Eebels in the West. 
 And 1 did not much care, for I was sick of 
 lying in hold, amidst Evil Odours, and with 
 a green wound. It came even to whispering 
 that one of us at least would be made a Gib- 
 beting-in-chains example for killing the 
 Grenadier, if that Act could be fixed on any 
 particular Black. And half in jest, half in 
 earnest, the Woman-Keeper told me on the 
 morning of the Assizes that, young as I was 
 (not yet twelve years of age), my bones 
 might rattle in a birdcage in the midst of 
 Charlwood Chase ; for if I could brain one 
 Grenadier, I could kill another. But yet, 
 being so Aveary of the Life, I did not much 
 Gare. 
 
 It was still somewhat of a Belief to me to 
 come into the Dock, and look upon State 
 and Bich Clothes (in which I have always 
 taken a Gentleman-like pleasure), in the 
 stead of all the dirt and squalor which for so 
 long had been my surrounding. There were 
 the Judo-es all ran^^ed, a Terrible show, in
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 291 
 
 their brave Scarlet Eobes and Fur Tippets, 
 with great monstrous Wigs, and the 
 King's Arms behind them under a 
 Canopy, done in Carver's work, gilt. They 
 frowned on us dreadfully when we came 
 trooping into the Dock, bringing all manner 
 of Deadly pestilential Fumes with us from 
 the Gaol yonder, and which not all the rue, 
 rosemary, and marjoram strewn on the Dock- 
 ledge, nor the hot vinegar sprinkled about 
 the Court, could mitigate. The middle 
 Judge, who was old, and had a split lip and 
 a fang protruding from it, shook his head at 
 me, and put on such an Awful face, that 
 for a moment my scared thoughts went back 
 to the Clergyman at St. George's, Hanover 
 Square, that was wont to be so angry with 
 me in his Sermons. Ah, how different was 
 the lamentable Hole in the which I now 
 found myself cheek by jowl with Felons and 
 Caravats, to the great red-baize Pew in which 
 I had sat so often a Little Gentleman ! He 
 to the right of the middle Judge was a very 
 sleepy gentleman, and scarcely ever woke 
 u2
 
 292 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OE 
 
 up during the proceedings, save once towards 
 one of the clock, when he turned to his 
 Lordship (whom I had at once set down as 
 Mr. Justice Blackcap, and was in truth that 
 Dread Functionary), saying, " Brother, is it 
 dinner-time?" But his Lordship to the 
 left, who had an old white face like a sheep, 
 and his w^ig all awry, was of a more placahle 
 demeanour, and looked at me, poor luckless 
 Outcast, with some interest. I saw him 
 turn his head and whisper to the gentleman 
 they told me was the High Sheriff, and who 
 sat on the Bench alongside the Judges, very 
 fine, in a rohe and gold chain, and with a 
 great sheathed sword hehind him, resting 
 on a silver gohlet. Then the High Sheriff 
 took to reading over the Calendai% and 
 shrugged his shoulders, whereupon I in- 
 dulged in some Hope. Then he leans over 
 to Mr. Clerk of the Arraigns, pointing me 
 out, and seemingly asking him some ques- 
 tion ahout me ; but that gentleman hands 
 him up a couple of parchments, and my 
 quick Ear (for the Court was but small)
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 293 
 
 caught the words, " There are two Indict- 
 ments against him, Sir John." Whereupon 
 they looked at me no more, save wath a 
 Stern and Sorrowful Gravity ; and the Hope 
 I had nourished for a moment departed from 
 me. Yet then, as afterwards, and as now, I 
 found (although then too babyish to reason 
 about it), that, bad as we say the World is, it is 
 difficult to come upon Three Men together in 
 it but that one is Good and Merciful. 
 
 I feel that my disclaimer notwithstanding 
 the Bark of my ISTarrative is running down 
 the stream of a Garrulous talkativeness ; 
 but I shall be more brief anon. And what 
 would you have ? If there be any circum- 
 stances which should entitle a man to give 
 chapter and verse, they must surely be 
 those under which he was Tried for his 
 Life. 
 
 The first day we only held up our lumds, 
 and heard the Indictment against us read. 
 Some of us who were Moneyed had retained 
 Counsellors from London to cross-question 
 the witnesses ; for to speak to the Jury in
 
 294 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 aid of Prisoners, who could not often speak 
 for themselves, the G-entlemen of the Law 
 were not then permitted. And this I have 
 ever held to he a crying Injustice. There 
 was no one, how^ever, not so much as 
 a Pettifogger, to lift tongue, or pen, or 
 finger, to save little Jack Dangerous from 
 the Eope. My Protector, Captain iS^ight, 
 w^as at large ; Jowder, my first friend among 
 the Blacks, w^ns dead ; and, as Misery is 
 apt to make men Selfish, the rest of my 
 companions had entirely forgotten how 
 friendless and deserted I was. But, just as 
 w^e were going hack to Gaol, up comes to 
 the spikes of the Dock a gentleman with a 
 red face, and a vast husliy powdered wig, 
 like a cauliflower in curls. He wore a silk 
 cassock and sash, and w^as the Ordinary ; 
 hut he had forgotten, I tliink, to come into 
 the Prison and read prayers to us. He 
 kept those ministrations against such time 
 as the Cart was ready, and the Tree decked 
 wdth its hempen garland. This gentlemen 
 heckons me, and asks if I have an}' Coun-
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 295 
 
 seller. I told him, 'No ; and tliat I liad 
 no Friends ayont Mother Drum, and she 
 was laid up, sick of a pair of sore shoulders. 
 He goes back to the Bench and confers with 
 the Gentlemen, and by and by the Clerk of 
 the Arraigns calls out that, through the 
 Humanity of the Sheriff, the prisoner John 
 Dangerous was to have Counsel Assigned to 
 him. But it would have been more 
 Humane, I think, to have let the Court and 
 the World know that I was a poor neglected 
 Castaway, knowing scarcely my right Hand 
 from my left, and that all I had done 
 had been in that Blindfoldedness of Igno- 
 rance which can scarcely, I trust, be called 
 Sin. 
 
 Back, however, we went to Gaol, and a 
 great Rout there was made that night by 
 Mrs. Macphilader for the payment of all 
 arrears of Fees and Garnish to her ; for, you 
 see, being a prudent Woman, she feared lest 
 some of the prisoners should be Acquitted, 
 or Discharged on proclamation. And our 
 Gang of Blacks, for whose aid their friends
 
 296 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 in ambush — and tliey had friends in all 
 kinds of holes and corners, as I afterwards 
 discovered to my surprise — liad mostly 
 bountifully come forward, did not trouble 
 themselves much about the peril they were 
 in, but bestowed themselves of making a 
 Roaring Night. And hindered by none in 
 Authority, — for the Graolers and Turnkeys 
 in those days were not above drinking, and 
 smoking, and singing, and dicing with their 
 charges, — they did keep it up so merrily 
 and so roaringly, that the best part of the 
 night was spent before drowsiness came over 
 Aylesbury Graol. 
 
 Then the next day to Court, and there 
 the Judges as before, and Sir John the High 
 Sheriff, and the Counsel for the Crow^n and 
 for us, and twelve honest gentlemen in a 
 box by themselves, that were of the Petty 
 Jury, to try us ; and, I am ashamed to say,, 
 a great store of Ladies, all in ribbons and 
 patches and laces and fine clothes, that sate 
 some on the Bench beside the Judires, and 
 others in the body of the Court among the
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 297 
 
 Counsel, and stared at us miserable objects 
 in the Dock as though we had been a 
 Galantee Show. It is some years now since 
 I have entered a Court of Criminal Justice,. 
 and I do hope that this Indecent and Un- 
 civil Eehaviour of well-bred Women coming 
 to gaze on Criminals for their diversion 
 has utterly given way before the Bene- 
 volence and good taste of a polite 
 Age. 
 
 Wlien, at the last, I was told to plead, 
 and at the bidding of an Officer of the 
 Court, who stood underneath me, had 
 pleaded Not (jruilty, and had been asked 
 how I would be tried, and had answered, 
 likewise at his bidding, " By God and my 
 Country," and when after that the Clerk 
 of the Arraigns had prayed Heaven — and 
 I am sure I needed it, and thanked him 
 heartily at the time, kind Gentleman, think- 
 ing that he meant it, and not knowing that 
 it was a mere Legal Form — to send me a 
 good Deliverance, — the Judge bids me, to 
 my great surprise, to Stand By. I thought
 
 298 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 at first that they were going to have Mercy 
 on me, and vfoulcl have down on my knees 
 in gratitude to them. But it was not so ; 
 and the sleepy old Judge, suddenly waking 
 up, told me that there were two Indictments 
 against me, and that I should have the 
 honour of being tried separately. Grood- 
 ness save us ! I was looked upon as one of 
 the most desperate of the Grang, and was to 
 be tried, not only under the Black Act, but 
 that, not having the fear of Grod before 
 my eyes, but being moved by the instigation 
 of the Devil, I had, against the peace of our 
 Sovereign Lord the King, attempted feloni- 
 ously to kill, slay, and murder one John 
 Foss, a Corporal in his Majesty's Eegiment 
 of Grrenadier Footguards, by striking him, 
 the said John Foss, over the back, breast, 
 hips, loins, shoulders, thighs, legs, feet, 
 arms, and fingers, with a certain deadly 
 and lethal weapon, to wit, with a demijohn 
 of Brand}^ 
 
 I was put back and kept all day in the 
 prison. At evening came in my comrades.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 299 
 
 and from them I learnt that the case had 
 gone dead against them from the begmning, 
 that the Jury had found them guilty under 
 the Statute without leaving the box; and 
 that, as the felony was one without the 
 benefit of Clergy, Judge Blackcap had put 
 on a wig as black as his name, and sentenced 
 every man Jack of them to be hanged on 
 the Monday week next following. 
 
 So then it came to my turn to be tried. 
 The ordeal on the first Indictment was 
 very short ; for, at the Judge's bidding, the 
 Jury acquitted me of trying to murder Cor- 
 poral Foss before I had been ten minutes in 
 the dock. I did not understand the proceed- 
 ings in the least at that time ; but I was told 
 afterwards that the clever legal gentleman 
 who had drawn up the Indictment against me, 
 while very particularly setting dov/n the parts 
 of the body on which I might have struck 
 Corporal Foss, omitted to specify the one 
 place, namely, his head, on which I did hit 
 him. Counsel for the Crown endeavoured, 
 indeed, to prove that a splinter from the
 
 ;300 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 broken dernijolm liad grazed the corporal's 
 finger, but the evidence for this fell dead. 
 And, again, it coming out that I was 
 arraigned as John Danger, whereas I had 
 given the name of John Dangerous, to which 
 I had perhaps no more right than to that 
 of the Pope of Eome, the Judge roundly 
 tells the Jury that the Indictment is bad 
 in law, and I was forthwith acquitted as 
 aforesaid. 
 
 But I was not scot-free. There was that 
 other Indictment under the Black Act ; and 
 in that, alas, there was no flaw. The Solemn 
 Court freed itself, to be sure, of the Mockery 
 of finding a child under twelve years Guilty 
 of the attempted murder of a Grenadier six 
 feet high; but no less did the witnesses 
 swear, and the Judge sum up, and Counsel 
 for the Crown insist, and my Counsel feebly 
 deny, and the Jury at last fatally find against 
 me, that I had gone about armed and Dis- 
 guised by night, and wandered up and 
 down in the King's Forests, and stolen his 
 Deer, and Goodness can tell what besides ;
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 301 
 
 and so, being found guilty, the middle 
 Judge puts on his black cap again, and tells 
 me that I am to be hanged on Monday week 
 by the neck. 
 
 He did not say any thing about my youth, 
 or about my utter loneliness, or about the 
 evil examples which had brought me to this 
 Pass. Perhaps it was not his Duty, but 
 that of the Ordinary, to tell me so. The 
 Hanging was his department, the praying 
 belonged to his Eeverence. They led me 
 back to prison, feeling rather hot and sick 
 after the words I had listened to about being 
 " hanged by the neck until I was dead," 
 but still not caring much ; for I could not 
 rightly understand why all these fine gentle- 
 men should be at the pains of Butchering 
 me merely because I had run away from 
 school (being so cruelly entreated by Gnaw- 
 bit), and, to save myself from starvation, 
 had joined the Blacks. 
 
 Being to Die, it seemed for the first time 
 to occur to them that I was not as the rest 
 of the poor souls that were doomed to death.
 
 302 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OP 
 
 and that it behoved them to treat me rather 
 as a lamb tluit is doomed for tlie slaughter 
 than as a great overgrown Bullock to be 
 knocked down by the Butcher's Pole-axe. 
 So they put me away from the rest of my 
 companions, and bestowed me in a sorry 
 little chamber, w^here I had a truckle-bed to 
 myself. Dear old Mother Drum, being still 
 under disgrace, was not suffered to come 
 near me. Her trial, with that of Cicely 
 Grip, for harbouring armed and disguised 
 men, under the Black Act, which was like- 
 wise a felony, was not to come on till the 
 next session. I believe that the Great Gen- 
 tlemen at Whitehall were, for a long time 
 after my conviction, in a mind for Hanging 
 me. 'Twas thought a small matter then to 
 stretch the neck of a Boy of Twelve, and 
 children even smaller than I had worn the 
 white Nightcap, and smelt the Nosegay in 
 the Cart. Indeed, I think th.e Ordinary 
 wanted me to be Finished according to Law, 
 that he might preach a Sermon on it, and 
 liken me to one of the Children that mocked
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 303 
 
 tlie Prophet, and was so eaten np by the She- 
 Bears that came out of a Wood. When I 
 think on the Keverend and Pious Persons 
 who now attend our Criminals in their last 
 unhappy Moments, and strive to bring^ 
 them to a Sense of their Sins, it gives me 
 the Goose-flesh to remember the Profane and 
 Eiotous Parsons who, for a Mean Stipend^ 
 did the contemned work of Gaol Chaplains 
 in the days I speak of. Even while the 
 Hangman was getting into proper Trim, and 
 fashioning his tools for the slaughter, these 
 callous Clergymen would be smoking and 
 drinking with the keepers in the Lodge, 
 talking now of a Main at Cocks and now of 
 him who was to suffer on the Morrow, 
 fleering and jesting, v/itli the Church Service 
 in one sleeve of their cassock and a Bottle 
 Screw or a Pack of Cards in the other. And 
 the Condemned persons, too, did not take' 
 the matter in a much more serious light. 
 They had their Brandy and Tobacco even in 
 their Dismal Hold, and thought much less 
 of Mercy and Forgiveness than of the
 
 o04' THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 ease they would liave from their Irons 
 being stricken off, or the comfort they 
 would gain from a last bellyful of 
 Meat. I have not come to be sixty- 
 eight years of age without observing some- 
 what of the Things that have passed 
 around me ; and one of the best signs of the 
 Times in which I live (and due in great part 
 to the Humane and Benignant complexion of 
 his Majesty) is the falUng off in blood- 
 thirsty and cruel Punishments. If a Dozen 
 or so are hanged after each Gaol Delivery. 
 at the Old Baily, and a score or more 
 whipped or burnt in the Hand, what are 
 such workings of justice compared with the 
 Y/aste of Life that was used to be practised 
 under the two last monarchs? At home 
 'twas all pressing to death those who would 
 not plead, hanging, drawing, and quartering 
 (how often have I sickened to see the pitch- 
 seethed members of my Fellow-creatures 
 on the spikes of Temple Bar and London 
 Bridge !), taking out the entrails of those 
 convict of Treason (as witness Colonel
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 305 
 
 Towneley, Mr. Dawson, and many more 
 unfortunate gentlemen on Kennington Com- 
 mon), to say nothing of the burning alive 
 of women for petty treason, — and to kill 
 a husband or coin a groat were alike Trea- 
 sonable, — the Scourging of the same wretched 
 creatures in Public till the blood ran from 
 their shoulders and soaked the knots of the 
 Beadle's lash ; the cartings, brandings, and 
 dolorous Imprisonments which were theia 
 inflicted for the slightest of offences. Why,. 
 I have seen a man stand in the Pillory in 
 the Seven Dials (to be certain, he was a 
 secure scoundrel), and the Mob, not satis- 
 fied, nmst take him out, strip him to the 
 buff, stone him, cast him down, root up 
 the pillory, and trample him under foot,, 
 till, being Rescued by the constables, he 
 has been taken back to Newgate, and 
 has died in the Hackney Coach convey- 
 ing him thither. Oh, 'tis woe to think 
 of the Horrors that were then done in the 
 name of the Law and Justice, not only in 
 this country but in Foreign Parts, — with 
 
 VOL. I. X
 
 306 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 their Breakings on tlie Wheel, Questions 
 Ordinary and Extraordinary, Bastinadoes, 
 Carcans, Wooden horses. Burning alive too 
 (for vending of Irreligious Books), and the 
 like Barbarities. Let me tell you likewise, 
 that, for all the evil name gotten by the 
 Spanish and Portuguese Inquisitions, — for 
 which I entertain, as a Protestant, due De- 
 testation and Abhorrence, — the darkest 
 deeds ever done by the so called Holy Office 
 in their Torture Chambers were not half so 
 cruel as those performed with the full cog- 
 nisance and approbation of authority, in open 
 places, and in pursuance of the sentence of 
 the Civil Judges. But a term has come to 
 these wickednesses. The admirable ISlv. 
 Howard before named (whom I have often 
 met in my travels, as he, good man, with 
 nothing but a Biscuit and a few Eaisins in 
 his pocket, went up and down Europe Doing 
 Good, smiling at Fever and tapping Pesti- 
 lence on the cheek), — this Blessed Worthy 
 has lightened the captive's fetters, and 
 cleansed liis dungeon, and given him Light
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 307 
 
 and Air. Then I hear at the Coffee House 
 that the great Judge, Sir William Blackstone, 
 has given his caveat against the Frequency 
 of Capital Punishment for small offences; 
 and as His Majesty is notoriously averse 
 from signing more than six Death Warrants 
 at once (the old King used to say at council, 
 in his German English, " Yere is de Dyin' 
 speech man dat hang de Eogue for me ?" 
 meaning the Eecorder with his Eeport, and 
 seeming, in a sort, eager to despatch that 
 awful Business, of which the present Prince 
 is so Tender), I think that we have every 
 cause to Bless the Times and Eeign we live 
 in. For surely 'tis but affected Softness 
 of Heart, and Mock, Sickly Sentiment, to 
 maintain that Highwaymen, Horse-stealers, 
 and other hardened villains, do not deserve 
 the Tree, and do not righteously Suffer for 
 their misdeeds ; or that wanton women do 
 not deserve bodily correction, so long as it 
 be done within Bridewell Walls, and not 
 in front of the Sessions House, for the 
 ribald Populace to stare at. Truly our 
 x2
 
 308 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 present code is a merciful one, although I 
 do not hold that the Extreme Penalty of 
 the law should be exacted for such offences 
 as cutting down growing trees, forging hat- 
 stamps, or stealing above the value of a 
 Shilling, or even of forty ; nevertheless crime 
 must be kept under, that is certain.* 
 
 At all events, they didn't hang John 
 Dangerous. For a time, as I have said, 
 the Great Gentlemen at Whitehall hesi- 
 tated. I have heard that Justice Blackcap, 
 being asked to intercede for me, did, with 
 a scurril jest, tell Mr. Secretary that I was 
 a young Imp of the Evil One, and that a 
 little Hanging would do me no harm. 
 Eive, indeed, of my miserable companions 
 were put to death, at different points on 
 
 * Captain Dangerous, it will be seen, was, in regard 
 to our criminal code, somewhat in advance of the 
 ideas of his age, but he was scarcely on a level with 
 those of our own, and, I think, would have perused 
 with some surprise the speeches of Mr. Ewart and the 
 Vacation Thoughts on Capital Punishments of the late 
 Mr. Commissioner Phillips. — Ed.
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 309 
 
 tlie borders of Cliarlwood Chase, and one, 
 the unlucky Chaplain, met his fate before 
 the door of the Stag o' Tyne. The rest of 
 the Blacks, of whom, to my joy, I shall 
 have no further occasion to speak, were 
 sent to be Slaves in the American Plan- 
 tations. 
 
 I had lain in Gaol more than a month 
 after my Sentence, when Mr. Shapcott, 
 a good Quaker Grentleman of the place 
 (who had suffered much for Conscience' 
 sake, and was very Pitifully inclined to 
 all those who were in Affliction), began 
 to take some interest in my unhappy Self ; 
 calling me a strayed Lamb, a brand to be 
 snatched from the burning, and the like. 
 And he, by the humane connivance of the 
 Mayor and otlier Justices, was now per- 
 mitted to have access unto me, and to con- 
 ciliate the Keeper, Mrs. Macphilader, b}^ 
 money-presents, to treat me with some kind- 
 ness. Also he brought me many Good 
 Books, in thin paper covers ; the which, 
 although I could understand but very little
 
 310 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 of tlieir Saving Truths, yet caused nie to 
 shed many Tears, more Sweet than Bitter, 
 and to acknowledge, when taxed with it in 
 a Soothing way, that my former Manner of 
 Life had been most Wicked. But I should 
 do this good man foul injustice, were I to 
 let it stand that his benevolence to me was 
 confined to books. He and (ever remem- 
 bered) Mistress Shapcott, his Meek and Pious 
 Partner, and his daughter, Wingrace Shap- 
 cott (a tall and straight young woman, as 
 Beautiful as an Angel), were continually 
 bringing me Comforts and Needments, both 
 in Eaiment and Food. It churns m.y Old 
 Heart now to think of that Beautiful Girl, sit- 
 ting beside me in my dank Prison Boom, the 
 tears streaming from her mild eyes, calling 
 me by Endearing names, and ever and anon 
 taking my hand in hers, and sinking on her 
 knees to the . sodden floor (ydili no thought 
 of soiling her kirtle), while with profound 
 Fervour she prayed for the conversion of 
 errant Me. Sure there are Hearts of Gold 
 among those Broadbrims and tlieir fair
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 311 
 
 strait-laced Daughters. Many a Mer- 
 cliant's Money-bags I have spared for the 
 sake of Mr. Barzillai Shapcott (late of 
 Aylesbury). Many a Fair Woman have I 
 intermitted from my Furious Will in re- 
 membrance of the good that was shown 
 me, in the old time, by that pale, strait- 
 gowned Wingrace yonder, with her meek 
 Face and welling Eyes. Of my deep and 
 grievous Sins they told me enow, but they 
 forbore to Terrify me with Frightful 
 Images of Unforgiving Wrath ; speaking to 
 me of Forgiveness alway, rather than of 
 Torment. And once, when I had gotten, 
 through favour of the Keeper, Mr. Dredlin- 
 court his book on Death (and had half 
 frightened myself into fits by reading the 
 Apparition of Mrs. Yeal), these good people 
 must needs take it from me, telHng me that 
 such strong meat was not fit for Babes, and 
 gave me in its place a pretty little chap- 
 book, called '' Joy for Friendly Friends." 
 But that I am old and battered, and black 
 as a Guinea Negro with sins, I would go
 
 312 THE STRANGE ADVEKTUllES OF 
 
 join tlie Quakers now. Never mind tlieir 
 broad-brims, and theeing and tbouing. T 
 tell you, man, that tliey have hearts as soft 
 as toast-and-butter, and that they do more 
 good in a day than my Lord Bishop (with 
 liis coach-horses, forsooth !) does in a year. 
 And oh, the pleasure of devalising one of 
 these Proud Prelates, as I — that is some of 
 my Friends — have done scores of times 1 
 
 Nothing would suit the good Shapcotts 
 but that I should write in mine own hand 
 a Petition to the King's Majesty. The 
 Magistrates, Avho now began to take some 
 interest in me, were for having it drawn up 
 by their Town Clerk, and me only to put 
 my Mark to it ; for they would not give a 
 poor little Hangdog of a Black any credit 
 of Clergy. But being told that I could 
 both read and write, after a Fashion, it was 
 agreed that I was to have myself the 
 scrivening of the Document; they giving 
 me some Forms and Hints for beirinnins: 
 and ending, and bidding me con my Bible, 
 and clioose such texts as I thoudit bore on
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 313 
 
 my Unhappy Condition. And after Great 
 Endeavours and many painful days, and 
 calling all my little Scliolarship under my 
 Grrandmother, the kind old schoolmistress of 
 Foubert's Passage, Grnawbit (burn him !), 
 and Captain Night, I succeeded in pro- 
 ducing the following. I give it word for 
 word as I wrote it, having kept a copy ; but 
 I need not say that, as a Gentleman of 
 Fortune, my Style and Spelling are not now 
 so Barbarous and Uncouth. 
 
 This was my Petition to His Majesty : 
 
 " The Humble Petty slion of Jon Dangerous now a 
 pri sinner under centense off Deth in His Mag- 
 gesty's Gayle at Alesbury to his Maggesty Gorge 
 by the grease of God King of Grate Briton Frans 
 and Eyearland Deffender off the Fathe Showeth 
 That yore Petetioner which I am Unfortunate 
 enuff to be mixed up in this business Me and the 
 others wich have suffered was Cast by the Jewry 
 and Justis Bh\ckcapp he ses that as a Warming 
 and Eggsample i am to be Hanged by the Nek 
 till you are Ded and the Lord have Mercy upon 
 his Soul Great Sur your Maggesty tlie Book ses 
 that wen the wicked man turneth away from his 
 Wickedness wich he have committed and doeth 
 that wich is Lawful and Rite he shall save his
 
 314 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 Sole alive Therefore deer Great Sur wich a 
 repreive would fall like Thunder upon a Contrite 
 Hart and am most sorrowful under the Black 
 Act wich it is true I took the deere but was led 
 to it Deere Sur wich Mungo and others was 
 repreeved at the Tree and sent to the Plantations 
 but am not twelve yeeres old And have always 
 been a Prottestant Great Sur i shall be happy to 
 serve his Maggesty by see or land and if the 
 Granny deere he had not Vexed me but had no 
 other way being in a Komer and all Fiting and 
 so i up with the demmyjon which i hoap he is 
 better And your Petishioner will ever pray 
 your Maggesty's loving Subject and Servant 
 
 Jon Dangerous. 
 
 My Granmother was a Lady of Quality and lived 
 in her own House in Hannover Squair and was 
 used after her Deth very cruelly by one Mistress 
 Tallmash and Kadwallader which was the Stoard 
 and was sent in a Waggin like a Beggar Deere 
 Sur Mr. Gnawbit he used me shameful wich I 
 was Blak and Blue and the Old Gentleman he 
 ses you Bun away ses he into Charwood cliaise 
 and join the Blaks Deere Sur this is All which 
 Captain Nite would sware but as eloped I am 
 now lying here many weekes Deere Sur I shood 
 like to be hanged in.Wite for I am Innocent 
 leastways of meaning to kill the Grannydeere."
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 315 
 
 This was a Curious kind of Schoolboy letter. 
 Different I take it from those one gets from 
 a Brother, asking for a Crown, a Pony, or a 
 Plum cake. But my Schools had been of 
 the hardest, and this was my Holiday letter. 
 When the Mayor read it, he burst out a- 
 laughing, and says that no such Thieves' 
 Plash must be sent to the Foot of the 
 Throne. But Mr. Shapcott told him that 
 he would not have one word altered ; that 
 he would not even strike out the paragraph 
 where I had been irreverent enough to 
 quote a Text (and spell it badly) ; and that 
 what I had written, and naught else, should 
 go to the King. He took it to London 
 himself, and his Majesty being much elated 
 by some successes in Grermany, and the 
 Discovery of a Jacobite Plot, and moved 
 moreover by the intercession of a Foreign 
 Lady, that was his favourite, and v/ho vowed 
 that the little Deer-Stealer's Petition was 
 Monstrous Droll, and almost as good as a 
 Play, — His Majesty was graciously pleased 
 to remit my Sentence, on condition of my
 
 316 THE STRANGE ADVENTURES OF 
 
 transporting myself for life to His Majesty's 
 Plantations in I^orth America. 
 
 As to my transporting " myself/' that was 
 a Fiction. I was henceforth as much a Slave 
 to my own Countrymen as I was in after 
 days to the Moors. The Shapcotts would 
 willingly have provided me with the means 
 of going to the uttermost ends of the World, 
 but that was not the way the thing was to 
 be done. Flesh and Blood were bought and 
 sold in those days, and it did not mucli 
 matter about the colour. By that strange 
 Laxity which then tempered the severity of 
 tlie Laws, I was permitted, for many days 
 after my Fate was settled, to remain in a 
 kind of semi-Enlargement. I suppose that 
 Mr. Shapcott gave bail for me ; but I was 
 taken into his Family, and treated with the 
 most Loving Kindness, till the fearful in- 
 telligence came that I, with two himdred 
 other Convicts, had been "Taken up" for 
 Transportation by Sir Basil Hopwood, a 
 rich Merchant and Alderman of London, 
 who paid a certain Sum a liead for us to the
 
 CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 317 
 
 King's Government for taking- us to America, 
 where he might make Avhat j^rofit he pleased, 
 by selling our wretched Carcasses to he 
 Slaves to the Planters. 
 
 Oh, the terrible Parting ! but there was 
 no other Way, and it had to be Endured. 
 My kind friends made me up a packet of 
 Necessaries for the Voyage, and with a 
 Heavy Heart I bade them farewell. These 
 good people are all Dead ; but their woman- 
 servant, E-uth, a pure soul, of great Serenity 
 of Countenance, still lives ; and every 
 Christmas does the Carrier convey for me 
 to Aylesbury a Hamper full of the Grood 
 Things of this Life, and Ten Grolden 
 Guineas. And I know that this Good and 
 Faithful Servant (who has been well pro- 
 vided for) just touches the Kissing-crust of 
 one of the Pies my Lilias has made for her, 
 and that she goes straight with the rest. 
 Money and Cates, to the Gaol, and there- 
 with relieves the Debtors (whom Heaven 
 deliver out of their Captivity !). And it is 
 more seemly that she rather than I should
 
 31 S ADVENTURES OF CAPTAIN DANGEROUS. 
 
 do this thing, seeing that there are those 
 who will not believe that after a Hard Life 
 a man can keep a fleshy heart, and who 
 would be apt to dub me Hypocrite if these 
 Doles came from me directly. 
 
 END OF THE FIRST VOLUME.
 
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 ABEKOUTA: AND AN EXPLORATION OF 
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