With Portraits of Count DOrsay ami Countess De Calabrella. THE LADY’S AND GENTLEMAN’S SCIENCE OF ETIQUETTE; AND GUIDE TO PERFECT MANNERS IN SOCIETY. BY COUNT D'ORSAY AND COUNTESS DE CALABRELLA. TL. T£. -VTvU.t, ThU work is a Perfect Guide to true Etiquette for Ladies and Gentlemen in all kinds and phases of society, either together, or in company, as regards Manners, Dress, Fashion, Introductions, Conversation and Deportment at Home and from Home, Visiting, at the'Table, Going out to Dinner, Salutations and Ceremonies, Tattling, Bails, Concerts, Opera, Evening Parties, Dancing, Music, Letters and Present*. Marriage, and Usages of General Society’ with a Glaum at Bad Habits in both sexes. To which is added the Hand Book for the Toilet; being » complete Guide for the Preservation of the Complexion and Personal Beauty, Observations on Dress, with receipts for the manufacture of various articles for the Toilet, necessary for the preservation or restoration of Beauty, and for the removal of Freckles, Sunburn, Pimples, Ringworms, Wriukles, etc., with directions for the Hair, Eyes, Teeth, Lips, and how to always have a Pure Breath. This book should be iu the hands of every Lady and Gentleman. Philadelphia: T. B. PETERSON k BROTHERS, 306 CHESTNUT STREET. i*kd< i: .10 4 i:\T«.T B, PETERSON & BROTHERS1 PUBLICATIONS I'ki* L.^n.6 ou tiiis page will be found to be the very Best and latest Publications in the world, and are Published and for Sale by T. B. PETEKSON & BROTHERS, Philadelphia. MRS. HENRY WOOD’S BOOKS. 9t. 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The Ladles Science of Etiquette, - - * * Knowlson’s Complete Farrier, or Horse Doctor, - s - Knowlsun's Complete Cow or Cattle lfoctor, - »< The Complete Kitchen and Fruit Gardener, - » The Complete Florist and Flower Gardeuder, - S* Coal and Coal Oil, aud otherMluerals, - - * w Copies of any of the above v/orks will bo tent by Moil, free of Postage, to any pan of the United States, on reoeipt of tho retail price, by T. B. Peterson k Brothers, Philadelphia, Pft.THE LADY’S AND GENTLEMAN’S SCIENCE OF ETIQUETTE; AND GUIDE TO PERFECT MANNERS IN SOCIETY. BY COUNT D’ORSAY AND COUNTESS DE CALABRELLA. This work is a Perfect Guide to trne Etiquette for Ladies and Gentlemen in all kinds and phases of so- ciety, either together, or in company, as regards Manners, Dress, Fashion, Introductions, Conversa- tion and Deportment at Home and from Home, Visiting, at the Table, Going out to Dinner, Saluta- tions and Ceremonies, Tattling, Balls, Concerts, Opera, Evening Parties, Dancing, Music, Letters and Presents, Marriage, and Usages of General Society, with a Glance at Bad Habits in both sexes. To which is added the Hand Book for the Toilet; being a complete Guide for the Preservation of the Complexion and Personal Beanty, Observations on Dress, with receipts for the manufacture of various articles for the Toilet, necessary for the preservation or restoration of Beauty, and for the removal of Freckles, Sunburn, Pimples, Ringworms, Wrinkles, otc., with directions for the Hair, Eyes, Teeth, Ups, and how.to always have a Pure and Sweet Breath. This book should be in the hands of every Lady and Gentleman. T. B. PETERSON & BROTHERS; 306 CHESTNUT STREETLADY’S SCIENCE OF ETIQUETTE. CHAPTER I. INTRODUCTIONS. In the introduction of one gentleman to another, great pru dence and caution must be used by the really polite man ; bu« in the introduction of ladies to each ftther, and to gentlemen, infinitely more care is necessary, as a lady can not shake off an improper acquaintance with the same facility as a gentleman caH do, and their character is much easier affected by apparent con- tact with the worthless and the dissipated. It is incumbent, therefore^ on ladies to avoid all proffers of introductions, unless from those on whom, from relationship or other causes, they can place the most implicit confidence. As a general rule, ladies may always at once accord to any offers of introduction that may proceed from a father, mother, husband, sister, or brother; those from intimate cousins and tried friends are also to be considered favorably, although not to be entitled to the same implicit reliance as the former. No person of correct feeling will make an introduction 10 a lady, without having first apprized her of it, and obtained her consent. I* ormerly it was the habit for the ladies to courtesy on being introduced, but this has latterly been changed into the more easy and graceful custom of bowing. The habit of saluting and shaking hands is now quite obso- lete, except in some of the provincial towns in England wb*»re (v)ladies at first introduction salute other ladies by kissing them on the cheek, and fervently shake the hands of gentlemen. At present, in the best society, all that a lady is called upon to do, upon a first introduction either to a lady or u gentleman, is to make a slight but gracious inclination of the head. Upon one lady meeting another for the second or subsequent times, the hand may be extended in supplement to the inclina- tion of the head ; but no iady should ever extend her hand to a gentleman, unless she is very intimate,—a bow at meeting, and one at parting, is all that is necessary. Ladies should never bow hastily, but with slow and measured dignity. If you wish to avoid the company of any one that has been properly introduced, satisfy your own mind that your reasons are correct ; and then le; no inducement cause you to shrink from treating him with respect, at the same time shunning his company. No gentleman will thus be able either to blame or mistake you. If, in travelling, any one introduces himself to you, and does it in a proper and respectful manner, conduct yourself toward him with politeness, ease, and dignity ; if he is a gentleman, he will appreciate your behavior—and if not a gentleman, will be deterred from annoying you ; but acquaintanceships thus formed must cease where they began, and your entering into conversa- tion with a lady or gentleman in a boat or a coach does not give any of you a right to after-recognition. II any one introduces himself to you in a manner betraying the least want of respect, either toward you or himself, you can only turn from him in dignified silence,—and if he presumes to address you further, then there is no punishment too severe. Be very cautious of giving a gentleman a letter of introduc lion to a lady ; for remember, in proportion as you are esteemed by the lady to whom it is addressed, so do you claim for your friend her good wishes,—and such letters are often the means of settling the weal or the wo of the parties for life. Ladiesshould never themselves, unless upon cases of the most urgent business, deliver introductory letters, but should send them in an envelope enclosing their card. On receipt of an introductory letter, take it into instant con- sideration ; if you are determined not to receive the party, write t once some polite, plausible, but dignified cause of excuse. If the party is one you think fit to receive, then let your answer be accordingly, and without delay ; never leave unanswered till the next day a letter of introduction. If any one whom you have never seen before call with a let ter of introduction, and you know from its appearance who sent it, desire the person to sit down, and at once treat them politely; but if you do not recognise the hand-writing, it is quite proper, after requesting them to be seated, to beg their pardon, and pe- ruse the letter in order that you may know how to act. It is now, however, a very rare thing for any one to call upon a lady with an introductory letter; no one the least conversant with the rules of good society will do it; such letters ought to be sent in an envelope. If any one requests a letter of introduction, and you do not consider that it would be prudent, either in respect to your situ- ation with the person so requesting it, or with the one to whom it would be addressed, refuse it with firmness, and allow no in- ducement whatever to alter your purpose. On your introduction to society, be modest, retiring, unas- suming, and dignified ; pay respect to all, but most to those who pay you the most, provided it is respectful and timely. Hetnember that the principal beauty in the female character is modesty to all, and polite reserve to those you know little regarding; modesty is of itself so beautiful, that it often con- quers when a pretty face or a handsome form is overlooked. Never be afraid to blush when the feeling is genuine, but never affect to blush when you do not feel it—remember that blushing is more frequently the attendant of innocence than guilt. Modesty does not only show itself in the face, but also in thedress, and particularly in the manner, and is always a proof of good and liberal education ; no lady can be polite who is not modest and retiring; female politeness is itself the very essence of modesty. It is much better for a lady to say too little in company thar too much; her conversation should always be consistent with hei sex and age ; and although it may sometimes be bright and witty, yet it should not always be so. Men frequently look with a jealous eye on a learned woman, and are apt to denominate her a blue; be cautious, therefore, in a mixed company, of showing yourself too much beyond those around you. To a mind well-formed there is more real pleasure derived from the silent consciousness of superiority, than in the ostentatious display of it. It is possible to be silent, and yet not dull,—the silent eyes are often a more powerful conqueror than the noisy tongue; but be not, therefore, apparently care- less to the conversation of others—as the eyes can tell whether you are really absent or not, although the mouth gives no audi- ble token of presence. Avoid all indelicate expressions, and appear not to understand any that may be uttered in your presence. Some ladies not only relish double entendres, but actually use them. Yet, how- ever much it may create a feeling of cleverness at the moment, cool reflection is afterward sure to condemn it both on the part ol the speaker and listener. Such discourse, wantofi glances, and lightness of carriage, are considered by men as gauntlets to dare them to speak and act in a more free and unguarded manner than they otherwise would have the boldness to do. Let it be impressed upon your mind, that many ladies have lost their character through a little indiscretion on these heads— and it is as bad with the world to appear to have lost caste, as leally to have lost it.CHAPTER II. PROPRIETY OF DEPORTMENT. Propriety of deportment, or bienseancc, is a happy union of the moral and the graceful, and should be considered in two points of view ; it ought, therefore, to direct us in our important duties, as well as in our more trifling enjoyments. When we regard it only under this last aspect, some contend that mere in- tercourse with the world gives a habit and taste for those modest and obliging observances which constitute true politeness, but this is an error. Propriety of deportment is the valuable result of a knowledge of one’s self, and of respect for the rights of others; it is a feeling of the sacrifices which are imposed 011 self-esteem by our own social relations ; it is, in short, a sacred requirement of harmony and affection. But the usage of the world is merely the gloss, or rather the imitation of propriety; and when not based upon sincerity, modesty, and courtesy, it consists in being inconstant in everything, and in amusing itself by playing off its feelings and ridicule against the defects and excellences of others. Thanks to custom,—it is sufficient, in order to be recognised as amiable, that she who is the subject of a malicious pleasantry may laugh as well as the author of it. The usage of the world is, therefore, often nothing more than a skilful calculation of vanity, a futile game, a superficial obser- vance of form, a false politeness, which would lead to frivolity, or perfidy, did not true politeness anirhate it with delicacy, re- serve, and benevolence. Would that custom had never been separated from this virtuous amiability! We should then never see well-intentioned, and good people, suspicious of politeness ; and when victims to the deceitful, justly exclaim with bitterness, “ This is your woman of politeness nor should we ever have made a distinction between the fixed principles of virtue, and what is fit and expedient. The love of good, in a word, virtue.is then the soul of politeness ; and the feeling of a just harmony> between our interest and our social relations, is indispensable to 1 this agreeable quality. Excessive gayety, extravagant joy, great depression, anger, love, jealousy, avarice, and generally all the passions, are too often dangerous shoals to propriety of deport- ment. Moderation in everything is so essential, that it is even a violation of propriety itself, to affect too much the observance of it. It is to propriety, its justice and attractions, that we owe all the charm of sociality. At once the effect and cause of civilization, it avails itself of the grand spring of the human mind, self-love, in order to purify and ennoble it; to substitute for pride, and all those egotistical or offensive feelings which it generates, benevolence, with all the amiable and generous senti- ments, which it inspires. In an assemblage of truly polite peo- ple, all evil seems to be unknown ; what is just, estimable, and good, or what we call fit or suitable, is felt on all sides; actions, manners, and language, alike indicate it. And if we place in this select assembly, one who is a stranger to the advantages of a polite education, she will at once be made sensible of the value of it, and will immediately desire to display the same urbanity by which she has been pleased. If politeness is necessary in general, it is not less so in par- ticular cases. Neither rank, talents, fortune, nor beauty, can dispense with this amenity of manners; nor can anything inspire regard, or love, without graceful affability, mild dignity, and el- egant simplicity. If all the world feels the truth of the verse which is now a proverb-*- “ Cette grace plus belle encore que la beaut6,” every one also is sensible, that grace in conferring a favor, affects more* than the favor itself, and that a kind smile, or an affection- ate tone, penetrates the heart more deeply than the most brilliant elocution. As to the technical part of politeness, or torms alone, the inAT HOME, AND FROM HOME 9 tercourse of society, and good advice, are undoubtedly useful; but the grand secret of never failing in propriety of deportment, is to have an intention of always doing what is right. With such a disposition of mind, exactness in observing what is proper ap- pears to all to possess a charm and influence; and then not only do mistakes become excusable, but they become even interesting from their thoughtlessness and naivete. Be, therefore, modest and benevolent, and do not distress yourself on account of the mistakes of your inexperience ; a little attention, and the advice of a friend, will soon correct these trifling errors. CHAPTER III. AT HOME, AND FROM HOME. To receive visiters with ease and elegance, and in such a manner that everything in you, and about you, shall partake of propriety and grace—to endeavor that people may always be satisfied when they leave you, and be desirous to come again— are the obligations of the master, and especially of the mistress, of a house. Everything in the house ought, as far as possible, to offer English comfort, and French grace. Perfect order, exquisite neatness and elegance, which easily dispense with being sumptuous, ought to mark the entrance of the -house, the furniture, and dress of the lady. In a house where affluence abounds, it is indispensable to have a drawing-room ; if that can not be afforded, then let the receiving-rooi*. be the parlor. To receive company in a dining- room is not allowed, except among those who can not bear the expense ol furnishing a parlor or drawing-room. Simplicity ad- mit ed into an apartment of this kind, suited to smallness of means, we can not but approve, while we regret, nevertheless, the disagreeable things to which such a residence subjects theparties. But we have, in this respect, an express warning to hold out to people who give themselves up to it unnecessarily, for it is altogether opposed to the received usages of good soci- ety to put yourselves in a situation which you can not adorn ; then you are exposed to receiving twenty visits during dinner, of seeing as many interruptions during the setting of your table, since it is impossible to spread the cloth properly, etc., while strangers remain ; finally, of having them witness your domestic cares while removing the remains of a repast, the table-cloth, dishes, etc. Unless from absolute inability, you ought to light your stair- case. If the practices of good domestic economy, regulated by the cares of civilization, were more generally extended, an un- lighted staircase would not often be found. After having thus cast a rapid glance into the interior of the house, let us see in what manner it is necessary to receive visit- ers. When any one enters, whether announced or not, rise im- mediately, advance toward them, and request them to sit down; avoiding, however, the old form of “Take the trouble to be seated,” “ Come off the door, and into the fire,” etc. If it is a young man, offer him an arm-chair, or a stuffed one; if an elderly man, insist upon his accepting the arm-chair; if a lady, beg her to be seated upon the sofa. If the master of the house receives the visiters, he will take a chair and place himself at a little distance from them; if, on the contrary, it is the mistress of the house, and if she is intimate with the lady who visits her, she will place herself near her. If several ladies come at once, we give the most honorable place to the one most distinguished by rank. In winter, the most honorable places are those at the corners of the fireplace : in proportion as they place you in front of the fire, your seat is considered inferior in rank. More- over, when it happens to be a married lady, and one to whom we wish to do honor, take her by the hand, and conduct her to the corner of the fireplace. If this place is occupied by a young lady, she ought to rise, and offer her seat to the other, taking for herself a chair in the middle of the circle.AT HOME, AND FROM HOME. 11 A mistress of a house ought to watch anxiously that her guests experience no restraint before her. If a door or win- dow happens to be open in the room in summer-time, she should ask of visiters if it incommodes them. If a lady who receives a half-ceremonions visit, is sewing, she ought to leave it off immediately, and not resume it, except at the request of the visiter. If they are on quite intimate terms, she ought herself to request permission to continue. If a person visits in an entirely ceremonious way, it would be very impolite to work even an instant. Moreover, with friends a lady should hardly be occupied with her work, but seem to forget it on their account. In proportion as the visiter is a stranger, the master or mis- tress of the house rises, and any persons who may be already there, are obliged to do the same. If some of them then withdraw, the master or mistress of the house should conduct them as far as the door. But whoever the person be who departs, if we have other company, we may dispense with conducting them farther than the door of the room. The manner in which we usually reconduct visiters is regulated in an invariable mode. If it is a lady who is to be accompanied, the master of the house takes her hand, passes it under his arm, and thus leads her as far as the bottom of the staircase, unless the steps be so narrow that two can not go abreast. It is no longer the custom to give the hand to ladies, but to offer them the arm. This new custom does not at all change the ancient rule of propriety» which requires, that, in descending a staircase, we should give the side next the wall to the lady whom we accompany; we commonly present to her the right arm, provided, however, that necessity does not oblige us, in order to avoid placing her next the balustrade, to offer the left. If she is to return in a car- riage, we should politely hand her into it. We no longer practise that frank and open hospitality, by virtue of which, in the middle of winter, we request people to refresh themselves with some solid eatables. Such a proposawould now excite a smile; the only refreshment now offered /s a glass of wine. When a billet of announcement has informed you, as is customary, that a preceding invitation on your part will bring guests to your house, you must begin and carefully arrange the apartments yon intend for them. They should have a good bed, a bureau, a fire in the winter, and everything which can contribute to their comfort; a wash-hand basin, water, glass, tumblers, &c., everything which will contribute to neat- ness, or elegance, ought to be placed in the apartment. These preliminaries being arranged, a little before the ap- pointed hour of their arrival, you must wait patiently till they come. You should then congratulate them ; express the plea- sure you enjoy in receiving them, inquire kindly about the in- cidents of their journey, and request them to make your house their home ; this finishes the second series of the duties of hos- pitality. The third class of obligations, is assiduity to your guests otherwise it would seem, to them, that their presence was troub lesome. To you belongs the care of kindly offering to theii view everything in your house, in the city, or in the country, which is interesting ; of making parties in honor of them, as dinner-parties of their friends, or such as is presumed will please them ; these are obligations of hospitality which you can not omit. When visiters show any intention of leaving you, you ought affectionately to endeavor to detain them ; nevertheless, if their resolution seems immoveable, renew your invitations for another visit, and your regret at not having been able to succeed better in retaining them. To do the honors of one’s own house, it is necessary to have tact, address, and knowledge of the world, a great evenness of temper, and much affability. It is necessary to forget one’s self, in order to be occupied with others, but without hurry or affectation ; to encourage timid persons, and put them at their ease; and to enter into conver- sation, directing it with address rather than sustaining it our- selves. The mistress of a house ought to be obliging, of anAT HOME, AND KROM HOME. 13 equal temper, and attentive in accommodating herself to the particular tastes of every one, especially to appear delighted that guests are with her, and make themselves perfectlyet home. They, on their part, should show themselves contented and igrateful for the reception that is given them ; and should im- mediately on arriving at home, write to the persons who have entertained them, a letter of cordial thanks. The duties of hospitality are of- frequent recurrence, fatigu ing, and troublesome, but they are an indispensable obligation. To omit them is to be willing to pass for a person of no educa- tion, and no delicacy ; in short, it is to place people in a most embarrassing and painful situation. At home and abroad the carriage of the body is as expres sive as the tone of the voice, and perhaps more so, because it is more constant; it betrays to the observer all the shades of character, and you ought to be very careful of thus making a general confession, by affected manners, a pretending deport- ment, sneering ways, rough movements, a hard countenance impertinent signs and looks, simpering smiles, clownish gestures a nonchalant and effeminate posture, or a carriage of the bod) distinguished by prudery and stiffness. \oung ladies, little habituated to the world, ought to be on their guard against excessive timidity, for it not only paralyzes their powers, renders them awkward, and gives them an almost silly air, but it may even cause them to be accused of pride, among people who do not know that embarrassment frequently takes the form of superciliousness. Ilow often does it happen that timid persons do not notice y°u at all, or answer in a low voice, and fail in numberless agreeable attentions, for want of courage? These arttentions, -ltxl these duties, they discharge in petto, but who will thank them for it ? A proper degree of confidence, but not degen- erating into assurance, still less into boldness or familiarity, is then one ot the most desirable qualities in the world. To obtain which, you must observe the ton, and the manner of polite andobliging people, take them for your guides, and under their di- rection make continual efforts to conquer your timidity. Good temper, and good nature, are the real essentials to true politeness, and the most artful polish can never impart the “je ne sais quoi” of elegance, where these two requisites are want- ing. Propriety in the carriage of the body is especially indispensa- ble to ladies. It is by this that, in a walk, or any assembly, people, who can not converse with them, judge of their merit and their good education. How many dancers move off, and how many persons sigh with pity, at the sight of a beautiful woman who has a mincing way, affects grace, inclines her head affectedly, and who seems to admire herself incessantly, and to invite others to admire her also. Whoever makes up his mind to enter into conversation with an immoveable lady, and one who is formal and precise, stretching out the body, pressing the lips, and carrying back the elbows, as if they were fastened to her side ? The gait of a lady ought neither to be too quick nor too slow, the most easy and most convenient step is that which fatigues the least, and pleases most. The body and the head should be erect, without affectation, and without haughtiness; the move- ments, especially those of the arms, easy and natural. The countenance should be pleasant and modest. It is not in good ton for a lady to speak too quick or too loud. When seated, she ought neither to cross her legs, nor take a vulgar attitude. She should occupy her chair entirely, and ap- pear neither too restless, nor too immoveable. It is altogether out of place for a lady to spread out her dress for display, or to throw her drapery around her in sitting down, as upstarts do to avoid the least rumple. But what is especially to be avoided in ladies is, an unquiet, bold, and imperious air, for it is unnatural, and not allowable in any case. If a lady has cares, let her conceal them from the world, or not go into it. Whatever be her merit, let her not forget that she may be a manin the superiority of her mind and decision of character, but that externally she ought to appear a woman! An affectionate, complying, and almost timid aspect, a tendei solicitude for those who are about her, should be shown in a lady’s whole person. Her face should breathe hope, gentleness, and satisfaction; dejection, anxiety, and ill-humor, should be r.onstantly banished. CHAPTER IV. VISITING. Visits are a very important part of etiquette; they are not merely the simple means of communication established by ne- cessity, since they have at once for their object duty and pleas- ure, but they enter into almost all the acts of life. There are many kinds of visits ; the first are the visits on new-year’s-day; next those of friendship and of ceremony. At the return of each new-year, custom and duty require us to sometimes present ourselves to our relations first; afterward to our patrons, our friends, and those who have done any kind- ness for us. These visits are divided into several classes— those of the afternoon, which are the most polite; of the morn- ing, which are the most friendly and respectful; by cards, and presenting one’s self. Visits weekly, which are confined to ac- qu/ntances with whom we have not very close relations; month- ly, which are no less ceremonious, but, however, partake of co) .mess ; it is at Paris more than at any other place, that these visits are permitted; such calls demand much attention to the toilet; they should be as short as possible—a visit of a quarter af an hour is long enough, and we should be careful to retire when other persons come in. It would be ridiculous to wish persons a happy new-year in ceremonious visits. # 2It is not necessary to mention friendly calls, except *o state, that almost all ceremony should be dispensed with. They are made at all hours, without much preparation or dressing ; a too brilliant attire would be out of place, and if the engagement of the day carry you in such a costume to the house of a friend, you ought obligingly to make an explanation. Should you not find the person you call on at home, leave a card. With a friend or relation, whom we treat as such, we do not keep an account of our visits. The one who has most leisure, calls upon the one who has the least ; but this privilege ought not to be abused ; it is necessary to make our visits of friend- ship at suitable times. On the contrary, a visit of ceremony should never be made without keeping an account of it, and we should even remember the intervals at which they are returned, for it is indispensably necessary to let a similar interval elapse. People in this way give you notice whether they wish to see you often or seldom. There are some persons whom one goes to see once in a fortnight, others, once a month, and others, less frequently. In order not to omit visits, which are to be made, or to avoid making them from misinformation, when a preceding one has not been returned, persons who have an extensive acquaint- ance will do well to keep a little memorandum book for this pur- pose. We can not make ceremonious visits in a becoming manner, if we have any slight indisposition which may for the time affect our appearance, or voice, which may embarrass our thoughts, and render our company fatiguing. To take a suitable time for one’s self, or for others, is indispensable in visiting, as in every- thing else; if you can obtain this by remembering the habits of the person you are going to see, by making arrangements so as not to call at the time of taking meals, in moments of occupation, and when they are likely to be walking. This time necessarily waries : but as a general rule we must take care not to makeceremonious visits, either before the middle of the day or after four o’clock. To do otherwise would, on the one hand, look like importunity, by presenting one’s self too early, and on the other might interfere with arrangements that had been made for1 the evening. After making one’s toilet with care, visiters should furnish themselves with cards. Gentlemen ought simply to put their cards into their pocket, but ladies may carry them in a small elegant portfolio, called a card-case. This they can hold in their hand, and it will contribute essentially (with an elegant handkerchief of embroidered cambric), to give them an air of good taste. On visiting cards, the title is usually placed under the name, and, in iarge cities, the address, at the bottom of the card, and in smaller letters. Mourning cards are surmounted with a broad black margin ; half mourning ones, with a black edge only. It is bad ton to keep the cards you have received around the frame of a looking-glass ; such an exposure shows that you wish to make a display of the names of visiters. When from some cause or other, which multiplies visiters at your house (such as a funeral or a marriage), you are obliged to return these numerous calls, it is not amiss to preserve the cards in a convenient place, and save yourself the trouble of writing a list; but if, during the year, your glass is always seen bristling with smoke-dried cards, it w(?. oe attributed, without doubt, to an ill-regulated self-esteem. If the call is made in a carriage, the servant will ask if the lady you wish to see is at home. If persons call on foot, they go tnemseives to ask the servants. Servants are considered as soimers on duty; if they reply that the person has gone out, we snoutd by no means urge the point even if we were certain if was not the case ; and if by chance we should see the person, we snouia appear not to have noticed it, but leave our card, retire, ana never call again. When the servant informs us that the lady or gentlemen is unwell, engaged in business, or dining, we must accordingly retire. Wlimn fifteen years past, it has been the custom with laclitwto take off their hats and shawls ; but that supposes an intimacy which would authorize their abstaining from it, at the houses of those with whom they are not much acquainted; and if they are , invited to lay them aside, they should refuse. The short time devoted to a ceremonious visit, the necessity of consulting a glass in replacing the head-dress, and of being assisted in putting on the shawl, prevent ladies from accepting the invitation to lay them aside. If they are slightly familiar with the person they are visiting, and wish to be more at ease, they should ask per- mission, which should be granted them, at the same time, rising to assist them in taking off their hat and shawl. An arm-chair, or a piece of furniture at a distant part of the room, should re- ceive these articles ; they should not be placed upon the couch, without the mistress of the house puts them there. At the house of a person we visit habitually, we can lay them aside without saying a word, and a lady can even adjust her hair, &c., before the glass, provided she occupies only a few moments in doing it. If the person you call upon is preparing to go out, or to sit down at table, you ought, although asked to remain, to retire as soon as possible. The person visited so unseasonably, should, on her part, be careful to conceal her knowledge, that the other wishes the visit ended quickly. We should always appear delighted to receive visiters ; and should they make a short visit, you must express your regret. Ceremonious visits should be short; if the conversation ceases without being again continued by the person you have come to see, and if she gets up from her seat under any pretext whatever, custom requires you to make your salutation and withdraw. If before this tacit invitation to retire, other visiters are announced, you should adroitly leave them without saying much. If, while you are present, a letter is brought to the person you are visit- ing, and she should lay it down without opening it, you must entreat her to read it; she will probably not do so, and faig circumstance will warn you to shorten your visit. When y»*; make a half-ceremonious call, and the person you are visitinginsists upon your stopping, it is proper to do so, but after a few minutes you should rise to go; if you are urged still further, and are taken by the hands and made to sit down, as it were by force, to leave immediately would be impolite; but, neverthe- less, after a short interval, get up a third time, and then certainly retire. To carry children or dogs with one on a visit of cere- mony, is altogether vulgar. Even in half-ceremonious visits, it is necessary to leave one’s dog in the anti-room; the nurse who holds the infant, must also be left without the drawing-room, and this circumstance sufficiently excuses such a suite. As for animals, it is a thousand times better not to have them at all. Young married ladies are at liberty to visit by themselves their acquaintances, but they can not present themselves in pub- lic without their husband or an aged lady. They are at liberty however, to walk with young married ladies or unmarried ones, while the latter should never walk alone with their companions. Neither should they show themselves, except with a gentleman of their family; and then he should be a near relation of re- spectable age. Except in certain provincial towns, where there is a great strictness in behavior, young married ladies receive the visits of gentlemen ; they permit their company in promenades, without suffering the least injury to their reputation, provided it is al- ways with men of good morals, and that they take care to avoid every appearance of coquetry. Young widows have equal liberty with married ladies. A lady ought not to present herself alone in a library or a museum, unless she goes there to study, or work as an artist. A lady ought to have a modest and measured gait; too great hurry injures the grace which ought to characterize her. She should not turn her head on one side and the other, especially in large towns, where this bad habit seems to be an invitation to the impertinent. If such persons address her, she should take good care not to answer them a word. If they persist, sheshould tell them in a brief and firm, though polite tone, that 3he desires to be left to herself. If a man follow her in silence, she should pretend not to perceive him, and at the same time, hasten a little her step. Toward the close of the day, a young lady would conduct herself in an unbecoming manner if she should walk alone; and if she passes the evening with any one, she ought to take rare that a domestic comes to accompany her; if not, to request the person whom she *is visiting to allow some one to do so. But, however much this may be considered proper, and conse- quently an obligation, a married lady, well educated, will disre- gard it, if circumstances prevent her being able, without trouble to find a conductor. If the master of the house wishes to accompany you himself, you must excuse yourself politely, from giving him so much trouble; but Snish, however, by accepting. On arriving at your house, you should offer him your thanks. In order to avoid these two inconveniences, it will be well to request your husband, or some one of your relations, to come and wait upon you ; you will in this way avoid still another in- convenience. In small towns where malice is excited by igno- rance and want of something to do, they frequently censure the most innocent acts; it is not uncommon to hear slanderous and silly gossips observe, that madam such a one goes to madam such a one’s, for the sake of returning with her husband. The seeds of such an imputation, once sown, quickly come to maturity. The care of the reputation of ladies, further demands, that they should have a modest deportment, should abstain from for- ward manners, and free speeches. When any one who is visiting you, has need of a shawl or handkerchief, offer it with a complaisant zeal, resist the refusal which is made (and which propriety does not require), select the best you have, in short, urge the persons not to be in haste to return the articles. If it is very bad weather, and the occa- sion a proper one, offer vour carriage (if you have one) or anumbrella. The articles thus lent should be returned the next day, by a domestic charged to thank the person for them. But if they are linen, they should not be returned without being washed. When a lady has borrowed ornaments of another, as for in- stance, jewels, the latter should always offer to lend her more than are asked for; she ought also to keep a profound silence about the things which she has lent, and even abstain from wear- ing them for some time after, in order that they may not be recognised. This does not allude to more important loans, which are not within the jurisdiction of politeness. If anv accident happens to a borrowed article, we must re- pair the loss immediately. CHAPTER V. TABLE. Politeness ought, as we have seen to direct and embellish all the circumstances of life; but it is, if possible, still more necessary in relation to pleasures; which without it would have no attraction. It may be said that dining is almost an event, so many points of propriety has the mistress of the house to ob- serve. When we intend giving an entertainment, we begin by selecting such guests as may enjoy themselves together, or at least tolerate one another. If it is to be a gentlemen’s party, there should be no lady present, except the lady of the house. The dinner being determined upon, we give out, two or three days beforehand, verbal or written invitatiors. When we re- ceive a written invitation, we must answer immediately, whether we accept or not, although silence may be considered equivalent to an acceptance. In the latter case, we should give a plausi- ble reasoi for our declining, and do it with politeness. Whenthe invitation is verbal, we must avoid being urged, for nothing is more weak and disobliging; we ought either to accept or re- fuse in a frank and friendly manner, offering some reasonable motive for declining, to which we should not again refer. It is not allowable to be urged, except when we are requested to dine with some one whom we have only once seen at the house of a third person, or, when we are invited on a visit or other similar occasion. In the former case, if we accept, we should first leave a card, in order to open the acquaintance. Having once accepted, we can not break our engagement, unless for a most urgent cause. An invitation ought to specify exactly the hour of meeting, and you should arrive precisely at that hour. The table should be ready, and the mistress of the house in the drawing-room, to receive the guests. When they are all assembled, a domestic announces that the dinner is served up; at this signal we rise immediately, and wait until the master of the house requests us to pass into the dining-room, whither he conducts us by going before. It is quite common for the lady of the house to act as guide to the guests, while the master offers his hand to the lady of most distinction. The guests also give their arms to the ladies, whom they conduct as far as the table, and to the places which they are to occupy. Having arrived at the table, each guest respectfully bows to the lady whom he conducts, and who in her turn bows also. It is one of the first and most difficult things,- properly to arrange the guests, and to place them in such a man- ner, that the conversation may always be general during the en- tertainment ; we should, as much as possible, avoid putting next one another, two persons of the same profession, as it w'ould necessarily result in an aside dialogue, which would injure the general conversation, and consequently the gayety of the occa- sion. The two most distinguished gentlemen ought to be placed next the mistress of the house; and the two most distinguished iadies next the master of the house ; the right hand is especially the place of honor. If the number of gentlemen is nearly equaltt> that of the ladies, we should take care to intermingle them ; we should separate husbands from their wives, and remove near relations as far from one another as possible ; because, being always together, they ought not to converse among themselves in a general party. At table, as well as at all other places, the lady, of whatever rank, always takes precedence of the gentleman. Never refuse taking wine on being asked—you are not bound to do more than taste of the wine. It is not etiquette to wear gloves at table, although some affect ton and do so. The younger guests, or those of less distinction, are placed at the lower end of the table. As soon as the guests are seated, the lady of the house serves in plates, from a pile at her left hand, the soup which she sends round, beginning with her neighbors at the right and left, and continuing in the same order. A mistress of a house ought never to appear to pride herself regarding what is on her table, nor confuse herself with apologies for the bad cheer which she offers you; it is much better for ner to observe silence in this respect, and leave it to her guests to pronounce eulogiums on the dinner; neither is it in good ton to urge guests to eat, nor to load their plate against their inclination. if a gentleman is seated by the side of a lady or elderly per- son, politeness requires him to save them all trouble of pouring °ut for theirfeelves to drink, of procuring anything to eat, and °f obtaining whatever they are in want of at the table, and should be eager to offer them what he thinks to be most to their taste. It would be impolite to monopolize a conversation which ought to be general. If the company is large, we should converse with our neighbors, raising the voice only loud enough to make our- selves heard. Custom allows ladies at the end of an entertainment to dipth**ir fingers into a glass of water, and to wipe tliem with then nopkins; it allows them also to rinse the mouth, using their plate for this purpose, but custom sanctions in vain what is of itself disgusting. It is for the mistress of the house to give the signal to leave the table ; all the guests then rise, and, offering their arms to the ladies, wait upon them to the door. We should not leave the table before the end of the entertain- ment, unless from urgent necessity. If it is a married lady, she requests some one to accompany her; if a young lady, she goes v.iih her mother The question whether it is proper, or not, to sing at table, Depends now upon the ton of the master of the house. We do .«ot sing at the houses of people of fashion and the high classes of society ; but we may do it at the social tables of friends. Here we may repeat what has been said and proved a thousand times, how ridiculous it is to be urged when we know how to sing, or to insist upon hearing a person sing who has an invinci- ble timidity. After dinner we converse, have music, or what is more common, prepare the table for games. During the week which follows the entertainment, each of the guests owes a visit to the person who has been the entertainer. We usually converse at this time of the dinner, of the pleasure we have enjoyed, and of the persons whom we have met there This visit has received the cant name of visite de digestion. CHAPTER VI. SALUTATIONS AND CEREMONIES. In the first rank of customary formalities, we place those concerning the health. We shall, necessarily, have little to say on this head ; there are, however, some little rules which are not to be neglected.It is proper to vary the phraseology of these formal questions, as much as possible; and we must abstain from them entirely, toward a superior, or a person with whom, we are but little ac- quainted, as such inquiries presuppose some degree of intima- cy. In the last case, there is a method of manifesting our in- terest, without violating etiquette; it consists in making these inquiries of the domestics, or of other persons of the house, and of saying afterward, when introduced, “ I am happy, sir, to hear that you are in good health.” Custom forbids a lady to make these inquiries of a gentleman, unless he is very ill or very aged. To put a corrective upon this mark of regard, a lady who addresses a gentleman, should be earnest in her in- quiries of the health of his family, however little intimacy she may have with them. Many persons ask this question mechan- ically, without waiting for the answer, or else hasten to reply, before they have received it. This is in bad ton. Inquiries about the health, it is true, are frequently unimportant, yet they should appear to be dictated by attention and kindness. We must not, however, allow ourselves to be deceived, in mention- ing a slight indisposition, to persons who are strangers to us, because their interest can be only formal. After we are informed of the health of the person we are visiting, it is proper to inquire of them in relation to the health of their families ; but it would be wearisome to make a lon^ enumeration of the members. In case of the absence of near relations, we ask the person we are visiting, if they have heard from them lately, and if the news is favorable. They, on their part, ask the same of us. When you are not on visits of great ceremony, at the time of taking leave, you are commonly desired to give the compliments and salutations of the persons you are visiting to those with whom you live; then reply briefly, giving them assurances of your regard, &c. Politeness infuses into visits of some little ceremony, a col- oring of modesty, grace, and deference, which should be pre- served with the greatest care.In speaking, it is always proper to give the name of sir, ina- dam, or miss, and if the sentence is somewhat long, the title should be repeated. If the question is with regard to answer- ing in the affirmative or negative, we ought never to say roughly, yes or no. If the person addressed has a title, or that which he has fronr his profession, we should give it him, as count, doctor, &c. In case we meet with many persons of the same profession, we can then distinguish them by adding their name to the title. A lady will not say, “ My husband,” except among intimates ; in every other case she should address him by his name, calling him Mr. It is equally good ton, when alone with him, to designate him by his Christian name. But when one speaks to a gentleman of the lady to whom he is married, he should not say, your wife, unless he is inti- mately acquainted, but Mrs. is the most proper. The rules of politeness, in this respect, are the same in speaking of the hus- band. The custom of ladies courtesying in the street, is now per- fectly obsolete, except among the few antiquities who use hoops; when a lady sports a hoop, she is then, however, entitled to courtesy—otherwise they are only required to bow. CHAPTER VII. DRESS. Attention to one’s person, as well as to their reputation, is very necessary. If vanity, pride, or prudery, have frequently given to these attentions the names of coquetry, ambition, or folly, it is no reason why they should be neglected. The plainest dress is always the most genteel, and a lady that dressps plainly will never be dressed unfashionably.Next to plainness in every well-dressed lady is neatness of dress and taste in the selection of colors. If a lady does not possess a good eye for color, she ought never to rely upon her own judgment in the selection of her patterns, or in their arrange- ment upon her person, else she will be nothing more than a walking violation of all th 3 harmony of light and shade; and however expensively dressed, she will never appear either gen- teel or fashionable. Propriety requires that w*e should always be clothed in a cleanly and becoming manner,—even in private, in leaving our bed, or in the presence of no one, it requires that our clothing be in keeping with our fortune, age, and form, as well as with the season, the different hours of the day, and our different occupations. The most fashionable dress for a lady on first rising from bed, ia a small muslin cap, and morning gown of printed cotton. It is well that a half corset should precede the full corset, which last is used only when one is dressed ; for it is bad taste for a lady not to be laced at all. The hair-papers, if they can not be removed on rising, should be concealed under a bandeau of lace, or of the hair. 1 hey should be removed as soon as may be. In this dress we can receive only intimate friends, or per- sons who call upon urgent or indispensable business; even then we ought to offer some apology for it. To neglect to take off this morning dress as soon as possible, is to expose one’s self to embarrassments often very painful, and to the appearance of a want of education. Moreover, it is well to impose upon your- self a rule to be dressed at some particular hour (the earliest possible), since occupations will often present themselves to hinder your getting ready for the day. Disorder of the toilet can only be excused when it occurs rarely, or for a short time as in such cases it seems evidently owing to a temporary em- oarrassment; but if it occur daily, or constantly—if it seems the result of negligence and slovenliness—it is unpardonable, par- ticularly in ladies whose dress seems less designed for clothing than ornament.To suppose that great heat of weather will authorize disorder of the toilet, and will permit you to go in slippers, or with your legs and arms bare, or to take nonchalant or improper attitudes, is an error of persons of a low class, or destitute of education. Even the weather of dog-days would not excuse this; and if you would remain thus dressed, you must give directions that “ you are not at home.” On the other hand, to think that cold or rainy weather will excuse like liberties, is equally an error. Yon ought not to be in the habit of wearing noisy shoes; this custom is in the worst taste. However pressed she may be, a lady of good ton should not go out in a morning dress, neither with an apron nor cap, even if it is made of fine cloth and trimmed with ribands. We said before that dress should be adapted to the different hours of the day. Ladies should make morning calls in an elegant and sim- ple negligS, all the details of which we can not give, on account of their multiplicity, and the numerous modifications of fashion. It is necessary for them, when visiting at this time, to arrange their toilet with great care. Still, ceremonious visits, evening visits, and especially balls, require more attention to the dress of the head, and a more brilliant costume. There are head- dresses particularly designed for such occasions, and for no oth- er, such as rich blonde caps, ornamented with flowers, brilliant barrettes and toques, appropriate to the drawing-room. Situation in the world determines among ladies those differ- ences which, though otherwise well marked, are becoming less so every day. Every one knows, whatever be the fortune of an unmarried lady, her dress ought always, in form as well as orna- ments, to exhibit less of a recherche appearance, and should be less showy than that of married ladies. Costly cashmeres, very rich furs and diamonds, as well a9 many other brilliant ornaments, are to be forbidden a young lady; and those who act in defiance of these rational marks of propriety, make us believe that they are possessed of an unre- strained love of luxury, and deprive themselves of the pleasureof receiving these ornaments from the hand of the man of thei> choice. All ladies can not use indiscriminately the privilege which marriage confers upon them in this respect, and the toilet ot those whose fortune is moderate should not pass the bounds of an elegant simplicity. We must beware of a shoal in this case; frequently a young lady of small fortune, desiring to appear decently in any splen did assembly, makes sacrifices in order to embellish her modest attire. But these sacrifices are necessarily inadequate; a new and brilliant article of dress is placed by the side of a mean or old one. The toilet then wants harmony, which is the soul of elegance as well as of beauty. Moreover, whatever be the opu- lence which you enjoy, luxury encroaches so much upon it, tha no riches are able to satisfy its demands ; but fortunately, pro- priety, always in accordance with reason, encourages by this maxim social and sensible women to appreciate the situation in which they may be placed, and to appear neither too high, nor too low. It is alike ridiculous either to pretend to be the most showy, or to display the meanest attire, in an assembly. The rules suitable to age resemble those which mediocrity of fortune imposes ; for instance, old ladies ought to abstain from gaudy colors, recherche designs, too late fashions, and graceful ornaments, as feathers, flowers, and jewels. A lady in her de- cline wearing her hair elaborately dressed, and having short sleeves, and adorned with necklaces, bracelets, &c., offends against propriety as much as against her interest and dignity. If ladies would wish to appear clothed in good taste and har- mony, they ought to adopt in summer light garments and deli- cate colors, and in winter, furs, thick and warm fabrics, and full colors. It is superlatively ridiculous for a lady to go on foot, with her head dressed or attired for the drawing-room or a ball. Who does not perceive how laughable it is to see a lady, who is clothed in satin, lace, or velvet, laboriously walking in the dust or mud ?Vary your toilet as much as possible, for fear that idlers and malignant wits, who are always a majority in the world, should amuse themselves by making your dress the description of your person. Certain fashionables seek to gain a kind of reputation by the odd choice of their attire, and by their eagerness to seize upon the first caprices of the fashion. Propriety with difficulty toler- ates these fancies of a spoiled child ; but it applauds a woman of sense and taste, who is not in a hurry to follow the fashions, and asks how long they will last, before adopting them; finally, who selects and modifies them with success, according to her size and figure. CHAPTER VIH. BALLS, CONCERTS, EVENING PARTIES, AND DANCING. These amusements presuppose a fortune and good ton; the practice of society, therefore, and consequently a forgetfulness of the precepts of politeness in respect to them, would be truly preposterous. When you wish to give a dance, you send out invitations a week beforehand, that the ladies may have time to prepare arti- cles for their toilet. If it is to be a simple evening party, in which we may wear a summer walking-dress, the mistress of the house gives verbal in- vitations, and does not omit to apprize her friends of this cir- cumstance, or they might appear in unsuitable dresses. If, on the contrary, the soiree is to be in reality a ball, the invitations are jrritten, or what is better, printed, and expressed in the third person. A room appropriated for the purpose, and furnished with cloak-pins, to hang up the shawls and other dresses of the ladies, is almost indispensable. Domestics should be therealso, to aid them in taking off and putting on their outside garments. We are not obliged to go exactly at the appointed hour; it is even fashionable to go an hour later. Married ladies are accom- panied by their husbands; unmarried ones, by their mother, or by a chaperon. These last ladies place themselves behind the dancers ; the master of the house then goes before one and another, procures seats for them, and mingles again among the gentlemen who are standing, and who form groups or walk about the room. A lady can not refuse the invitation of a gentleman to dance, unless she has already accepted that of another, for she would be guilty of an incivility which might occasion trouble; she would, moreover, seem to show contempt for him whom she refused, and would expose herself to receive in secret an ill compliment from the mistress of the house. Married or young ladies can not leave a ball-room, or any other party, alone. The former should be accompanied by one or two other married ladies, and the latter by their mother, or by a lady to represent her. Ladies should avoid talking too much ; it will occasion re- marks. It has also a bad appearance to whisper continually in the ear of your partner. The master of the house should see that all the ladies dance ; he should take notice particularly of those who seem to serve as drapery to the walls of the ball-room (or wall-fioivers as the familiar expression is), and should see that they are invited to dance. But he must do this wholly unperceived, in order not to wound the self-esteem of the unfortunate ladies. Gentlemen whom the master of the house requests to dance with these ladies, should be ready to accede to his wish, and even appear pleased at dancing with a person thus recommended to their notice. Ladies who dance much, should be very careful not to boast before those who dance but little or not at all, of the great num-ber of dances for which they are engaged in advance. They should also, without being perceived, recommend to these less fortunate ladies, gentlemen of their acquaintance. In giving the hand for ladies’ chain or any other figures, those dancing should wear a smile, and accompany it with a polite in- clination of the head, in the manner of a salutation. At the epd of the dance, the gentleman reconducts the lady to her place, bows and thanks her for the honor which she has conferred. She also bows in silence, smiling with a gracious air. In these assemblies, we should conduct ourselves with reserve and politeness toward all present, although they may be unknown to us. Persons who have no ear for music, that is to say, a false one, ought to refrain from dancing. Never hazard taking part in a quadrille, unless you know how to dance tolerably; for if you are a novice, or but little skilled, you would bring disorder into the midst of pleasure. Being once engaged to take part in a dance, if the figures are not fa- miliar, be careful not to advance first. You can in this way govern your steps by those who go before you. Beware, also, of taking your place in a set of dancers more skilful than your- self. When an unpractised dancer makes a mistake, we may apprize him of his error; but it would be very impolite to have .he air of giving him a lesson. Dance with grace and modesty, neither affect to make a pa* rade of your knowledge ; refrain from great leaps and ridiculous jumps, which would attract the attention of all toward you. In a private ball or party, it is proper to show still more re- serve, and not manifest more preference for one gentleman than another; you should dance with all who ask properly. In public balls, a gentleman offers his partner refreshments, but which she very seldom accepts, unless she is well acquainted with him. But in private parties, the persons who receive the company send round cake and other refreshments, of which every one helps themselves. Near the end of the evening, in aLETTEBS AND PR ESENT8. 33 well-regulated ball, it is customary to have a supper ; but in a soiree without great preparation, we may dispense with a sup- per ; refreshments are, however, necessary; and not to have them would be the greatest impoliteness. We should retire incognito, in order not to disturb the master and mistress of the house ; and we should make them, during the week, a visit of thanks, at which we may converse of the pleasure of the ball, and the good selection of the company. The proprieties in deportment, which concerts require, are little different from those which are recognised in every other assembly, or in public exhibitions, for concerts partake of the one and the other, according as they are public or private. In private concerts, the ladies occupy the front seats, and the gen- tlemen are generally in groups behind, or at the side of them. We should observe the most profound silence, and refrain from beating time, humming the airs, applauding, or making ridicu- lous gestures of admiration. It often happens that a dancing soiree succeeds a concert, and billets of invitation, distributed two or three days beforehand, should give notice of it to the persons invited. Be rarely seen at public places. Never appear at balls while in mourning. If you give a ball, dance in it rarely. CHAPTER IX. letters and presents. • In writing it is necessary to endeavor to make our style clear, precise, elegant, and appropriate for all subjects. Vivacity of discourse forces us frequently to sacrifice happy though tardy expressions, to the necessity of avoiding hesitation ; but what is thus an obstacle in speaking, does not interfere with the useat* the pen. We ought, therefore, to avoid repetitions, erasures, insertions, omissions, and confusion of ideas, or labored con- struction. If we write a familiar letter to an equal or a friend these blemishes may remain ; if otherwise, we must commence our letter again. The most exact observance of the rules of language is strictly necessary; a fault of orthography, or an incorrect expression, is not allowable, even in the least careful letter, or the most unimportant billet. Even correction is not admissible, for besides being a blemish to the letter, it betrays the ignorance or inatten- tion of the one who writes it. The choice of materials for writing, without being very essen tial, is yet necessary; to write on very coarse paper, is allowable only for the most indigent; to use gilt edged and perfumed paper for letters of business, would be ridiculous. Many distinguished people, however, reasonably prefer sim- plicity in this thing, and make use of very beautiful paper, but yet without ornament. It is extremely impolite to write upon a single leaf of paper, even if it is a billet; it should be always double, although we write only two or three lines. It is still more vulgar to use for an envelope, paper on which there are one or two words foreign to the letter itself, whether they be written or printed. The rules of politeness ought to decide as to the expense of postage. They require us to defray the expense of the letter, if it is written to distinguished persons, or to those of whom we ask any favor; but it would be an incivility, and sometimes a want of delicacy, to do it when we write to a friend, an acquain- tance, or to persons of little fortune, whose feelings we should fear to wound. It is as indispensable to answer when you are written to, as when you are spoken to, and the indolence which so many correspondents allow in themselves, in this respect, is an in- civility. And if, after all, they decide to answer, they begin by apologies so often renewed, that they become commonplace.We must use much care that these excuses may not appear ridiculous. Conciseness and some new terms of expression, are, in this case, indispensable. The same observation is applica- ble in making use of reproving terms. Letters supply the place of visit, in bestowing presents, or on occasions of marriages, funerals, etc.; and to neglect to write in such cases, is gross impoliteness. Two persons should not write in the same letter, by one writing upon the first, and another upon the second leaf, except we are very intimate with the correspondent. The same is applicable to postscripts. The language of men who write to ladies ought always to have a polish of respect, with which the latter ought not to dispense in answering; but on occasions of great ceremony, a lady may address to a man such phrases as “ I have the honor to be,” &c., while he should use the most respectful terms, as “ Deign, madam, to allow me “ Allow me the honor of presenting you my respects,” &c. You may use a lofty style toward persons to whom you owe respect; an easy, trifling, or even jesting style toward a friend; and a courteous style toward one another generally. If you have many subjects to treat of in the same letter, com- mence with the most important; for if the person to whom you write is interrupted while reading it, he will be the more impa- tient to resume its perusal, however little interesting he may find it. It is useful and convenient to begin a new paragraph at every change of the subject. After having written “ Sir,” or “ Mad- am,” at the top of the letter, we should not commence with one of these phrases : “ fcir, “Madam, “Your sister has written me that.” We should say—“ I understand by a letter which Madam , your sister, has written me.” I ake care, also, when writing to a person of great considera- tion, not to make compliments to any one, but write to this third person whatever you wish him to know. Titles of respect, as lordship, majesty, highness, excellencyhonor, madam, &c., ought never to be abbreviated, either in wri- ting to the persons theniselves, or to any one who has acquaint- ance with them. Figures are used only for sums and dates; numbers of men, days, weeks, &c., are to be written at length. The interior form of a letter has reference to the titles and qualities of persons to whom it is proper to give them ; the more or less courteous phrases which we should use, the more or less respectful manner with which the commencement and body of the letter are to be arranged, and the more or less hum- ble terms which we are to use for the signature, the address, or the superscription. The words esteem and affection are used only in letters to friends or acquaintance, because they are too familiar; but when accompanied by words which relieve them, they do not offend one. As for example, we can say—“ I am, with profound re- spect, and the highest esteem,” &c. The following forms may be used with elegance: “ Accept, sir, the assurances of high consideration,” “Be pleased to accept the assurances,” &c. The date of a letter may be put at the beginning when we write to an equal; but in writing to a superior, it should be at the end, in order that the title at the nead of the letter may be entirely alone. In letters of business, on the contrary, it is ne- cessary to date at the top, and on the first line, that persons may know conveniently the chronological order of their communica- tions. The date is often necessary to the understanding of many passages of your letter, to explain the sense of one which your correspondent may have received at the same time from another person; therefore, never omit it. In a simple billet, we put the date of the day, Monday, &c It is well sometimes to add the hour. Every letter to a superioi ought to be folded in an envelop. It shows a want of respect to seal with a wafer—we must use sealing-wax. Men usually select red; but young ladies use bronze, green, and other col-LETTERS AND PRESENTS. 37 ors. Both use black wax when they are in mourning. Except in this last case, the color of the seal is immaterial, but not the size; for very large ones are in bad taste. The smaller and more recherche, the better ton they are. When the letter is closed with or without an envelope, we put only a single seal upon it; but if the letter is large, we use two. Moreover, if it contains important papers, it should have three seals, or more, according to the size of the envelope. Tf a per- son takes charge of a letter as a favor, it would be very impolite to put more than one seal upon it. If the letter should be fold- ed in such a manner that, by partly opening it at the end, its contents may be read, it would be equally impolite to put a lit- tle wax upon the edge. We can use this precaution only when the letter is sent by the post, or by a domestic. W hen we use no envelope, and the third page of the letter is all written upon, we should leave a small blank space on each side, where the seal is to be put; as without this precaution, many very important words will be covered. Persons of taste, who have no coat of arms, adopt a seal bear ing some ingenious device. A letter which is to be shown as a letter of introduction, or recommendation, should never be sealed, when given or sent to the one who is to be the bearer, as he ought necessarily to know the contents. And to seal it without having first allowed the bearer to read it, would be extremely impolite. You should prove to the person recommended, that you have spared no pains to render him a service. Some distinguished persons are flattered by our omitting, in writing to them, to designate precisely their address. This is an error ; we should indicate with exactness the town, &c., if there is more than one town of the same name. In a large city, it is well to write the name of the street and number, as well as the quarter of the city where the street is. People of business abbreviate this, by putting iY. and the number, or the number alone, but this practice is more exped:tious than polite.It is well to add to the name, the title, or profession, in order to prevent mistake. However, if circumstances have obliged any of your acquaintance to act in an inferior situation, it would be a want of delicacy to join to his name that of his business. In billets, we put the date at the top of the paper, and begin the letter about two inches below. The word “ Sir” is put in the first line. We conclude with one of these phrases—“ I am, sir, yours,”—“ I am truly yours,” &c. A billet is not written to ladies, or to superiors^ this was introduced only to avoid ceremony. The most unceremonious billets, contrary to the common ac- ceptation, are written in the third person. They contain very httle, and begin thus—“ Mr. (or Madam) N. present their re- spects, or compliments, to Mr. Such-a-one, and request,” &c. After having made the request, we end with, “ And will feel obliged.” In this kind ot billets, it is best not to use the pronoun he or fhe; for, independently of the incivility, it might result in con- (usion. Sometimes it would be difficult to know whether the pronoun referred to the person who received the letter, or to the one who wrote it. In the eyes ol persons of delicacy, presents are of no worth, except from the manner in which they are bestowed. Strive, then, to gain them this value. Presents are offered, first to relations, and to friends, and they occur under different circumstances; on our arrival at a place from which we have been absent for a long time; when our in tiniate friends leave the town in which we reside ; on our return from a journey, particularly to the capital; on marriage days birth days, days of baptism, or new-year’s-day. The most delicate presents are the productions of our own industry; a drawing, a piece of needle-work, ornamental hair- work, &c. But such offerings, though invaluable among friends, are not used on occasions of ceremony. Presents should excite surprise and pleasure; therefore, youought to involve them in a little mystery, and present them with an air of joyful kindness. When you have made your offerings, and thanks have been elicited, do not bring back the conversation to the subject; avoid, particularly, making your gift of consequence. On the contrary when its merit has been extolled, and the persons who have re- ceived the present have evinced a lively satisfaction, say that the gift receives all its value from their opinion of it. However slight the charm a present may have, or if even in- significant, we should be ill-bred not to manifest mvh pleasure in receiving it. It is, moreover, necessary, when an opportunity offers, to speak of it, and do not fail of saying to the donor, how useful or agreeable his present is to you. In proportion as a long time has elapsed, this attention is the more amiable, as it oroves that you have preserved the object with care. Never give away a present which you have received from another per- son ; or at least so arrange it, that it may never be known. CHAPTER X. * marriage. Let it be impressed upon your mind, that a little more cere- mony should be used toward your husband’s relations, than to- ward your own. With your own relations, you are likely to have been long acquainted, and they are therefore supposed to know all your little peculiarities of character; but in many cases, ladies are suddonly placed by marriage in a new circle, and the utmost respect and caution are necessary, not to offend those who can be made friends or enemies, often by a smile or a frown. If anything can render politeness ridiculous, and even odious, it is the disposition of certain persons, who in society are mod- erate, amiable, and gracious ; but in private, show themselve*morose, rough, and ill-natured. This fault, much too common, is one of the greatest inconsistencies of the human mind. Some use all their exertions to please the world, which they only see cursorily, and in which they have only power to procure a few moments of pleasure, and they neglect to be agreeable to their husband, from whom is expected the happiness of a whole life. Perhaps it would be better to be continually capricious, or harsh, for the contrast of politeness in the drawing-room, with the im- politeness at home, makes it appear still more odious. Con- jugal intimacy, it is true, dispenses with the etiquette established by politeness, but it does not dispense with attentions. In the presence of your husband, you ought never to do those things which carry with them a disagreeable idea, nor perform those duties of the toilet, which, before any one but yourself, offend decency and cleanliness. One ought never to permit disorder in their husband’s ward robe under the excuse that he is just up, or at bis own house. To dress with neatness and elegant simplicity, is important, even at home. The conversation of husbands can not be elegant, and sustained in the same manner that it is in society; it would indeed be su- perlatively ridiculous, that it should not have interruption, or relaxation ; but it should be free from all impoliteness and indelicacy. If at any time the society of your husband causes you ennui, you ought neither to say so, nor give any suspicion of the cause, by abruptly changing the conversation. In all discussions you should watch yourself attentively, lest domestic familiarity raise itself by degrees to the pitch ot a quarrel. To entertain with a politeness particularly affectionate, the friends of the person with whom you are connected by mar- riage ; to respect inviolably the letters which he writes or re- ceives ; to avoid prying into the secrets which he conceals from you ; never to act contrary to his inclinations unless they arenjurious to himself, and even in this case not to oppose him, out to endeavor to check them with address and kindness; to beware of confiding to strangers, or to domestics, the little vex- ations which he causes you; to dread like poison marks of con- tempt, coldness, suspicion, or reproaches ; to apologize prompt- ly, and in an affectionate manner, if you have allowed yourself to run into any ill-humor; to receive his courtsels with attention, and to execute them as quickly as possible ; these are the obli- gations of propriety and love, by which married persons of gen- tleness bind themselves. There is a still more rigorous duty for new-married persons; they must abstain in public from every mark of affection to , conspicuous, and every exclusive attention. Married persons who, in society, place themselves continually near one another, and who converse and dance together, do not escape the ridicule to which their feelings blind them. In society we ought, above everything, to avoid being per- sonal ; for a husband or a wife is another self; and we must for- get that self. CHAPTER XI. SERVANTS. Much has been said about bad servants, and there are a great many bad ones among the numerous class; but it is more their misfortune than their fault. They are for the most part taken from a class of society who do not attend properly to the up- bringing of their children, and are placed too frequently with those who pay no attention to their comfort. Treat your servants always with kindness, but at the same time with firm respect for yourself; on no account be familiar with them, neither hear their tattle, nor tattle with them, and you will have at least a chance of sometimes making them attentive,zealous, and grateful, and of having your services performed with order and alacrity. Do not scold your servants; you had better turn them away at once. When they need reproof, give them it in a calm, dig- nified, and firm manner; but on no account, if you can possibly avoid it, find fault with them in the presence of strangers, even though they should let fall the tray with your best set of china upon it. - The ton of the mistress oi a house is often affected, if not measured, by that of her servants ; take care, therefore, to make them civil and polite, teach them to assist your visiters in putting off and on their greatcoats, cloaks, &c., and let them always be ready to open the door when your guests arrive or depart. Accustom your servants never to appcai before you too slat- ternly or too richly dressed; never allow them to enter into conversation with each other in your presence, nor to answer you by signs or coarse terms. If you have only one servant, talk of her by her Christian name ; if you have more, talk of them by the names of fhei* offices, such as nurse, cook, housemaid, butler, footman, but al- ways address them by their Christian names. Although you must avoid all familiar confidential conversation, never speak to your servants with hauteur or harshness. Never entertain your visiters with any narrative of your ser- vants’ improprieties.THE TOILET. CHAPTER I. THE PRESERVATION OF PERSONAL BEAUTY. That a proper and somewhat careful attention to the preservation of personal beauty is not only advisable, but a positive duty, in the lady who would exercise her legitimate influence, either in her do- mestic circle, or in general society, few we apprehend will feel dis- posed to deny. It is to this source that we owe the largest portion of our pleasurable sensations ; and if it be true, as a general principle that the face is the index of the mind, it surely is of some conse- quence we should so arrange and care for our personal appearance as to call forth the most vivid emotions of pleasure and satisfaction in the breasts of those we love. In order to enable our fair readers to accomplish this most desira- ble end, in the most efficient manner possible, we conceive that some instructions, in reference to the preservation of beauty and the due arrangement of dress, with other information essential to be known, will not be unacceptable. We devote this chapter tc a consideration of the first subjects we have named. Those ladies who are desirous of preserving their personal charms from a premature decay, must, in the first place, pay especial atten- tion to the state of their general health. Without this, no artificial means will preserve that bloom and freshness which possess so irre- sistible a charm for the mind imbued with genuine taste, judgment, or feeling. To the maintenance of good health, regular habits, an even and cheerful temper, a due attention to diet, with bathing or frequent ablution of the whole body in water, and, above all, early rising, are indispensable. These important particulars being regarded with the attention they merit, the following instructions, combined with regn- larity and order, will be found to be of essential service (43)The subject of personal beauty we shall consider under the follow ing heads : The Complexion, the Hair, Eyes, and Teeth ; the Lips and Breath ; the Head and Feet; the Figure, and the general Carriage of the Body. The first subject which demands our attention is the complexion. The beauty of the skin has, in all ages, been an object of universal admiration ; and to preserve it from injury the most assiduous care has been employed. It is subject to many casualties, and if not properly attended to, is one of the most early indicators of the ravages of time. Hence much anxiety is felt to preserve its beauty in undi- minished freshness ; aud this has been laid hold of by unprincipled fabricators of cosmetics, who, for the purposes of gain, have, under tempting and alluring names, foisted upon the unwary most deleteri- ous, and, in some instances, fatal compounds. The human frame is covered with three distinct layers of skin ; the first thin, nerveless, and almost transparent. This is shed constantly, and produces on the surface that kind of scurf which soils the linen, and for which many persons find it so difficult to account. This layer is, when viewed through a powerful microscope, seen to be a network of the finest texture, through which both internal and external moisture will freely pass. This fact should be known, as it explains the process by which washes, lotions, &c., which contain a portion of some poi- sonous mineral, enter into, and act upon, the interior organs of the system. The second layer is thicker, and in it the nerves terminate • it is also the seat of color. The innermost coat of the skin is much thicker, but is not uniform, as on some parts of the body it is much thinner than on others, especially on the eyes and lips, where it is almost transparent. The texture of this is extremely close and fibrous, abounding with pores, so minute, that it is said one grain of sand would cover twonty-five thousand of them. Besides these minute pores, this inner skin is furnished with an immense multitude of glands and vessels ; and in it the nerves terminate, resting their ex- tremities in the middle skin, which is so constituted as to form a kind of soft cushion, 011 which the fine points of the nerves can lie without jijury, or being too much excited by external pressure. From this description of the skin, it will be at once perceived that it is capable of contraction by cold and dryness, and of expansion by heat and moisture. Hence, under the influence of certain passions, as indifference, contempt, or unconcern, the surface becomes dry andcontracted, and will frequently present that appearance which is com- monly known by the name of goose-skin. Under the influence of other passions and affections of the mind, as love, surprise, or dis- gust. skin will become dilated with heat and moisture, a height- ened color will tinge the cheek, and drops of perspiration will bedew the face—and, under strong excitement, the whole exterior of the body. These facts point out the great necessity of preserving a serenity of temper, and an unruffled state of mind, as essential to the preservation of personal beauty. Those who are in the habit of vielding to the sallies of passion, or indeed to violent excitement of any kind, will find it impossible to retain a good complexion, however lavish of hei favors nature may originally have been. To pi iserve a fair and bright complexion, is one ol the surest indi- cations of a rightly-directed mind. The nobler part of woman is a jewel of inestimable price, and it argues but little sensibility as to its real value, to be indifferent to the appearance or perfection of the casket in which, for the present, the Creator has enshrined it. In a healthy person, moisture i3 continually evolved; and this is generally united with an oily secretion, especially under the arms, &c.; this arises from the unctuous parts ol the flesh, and is frequently found to emit an unpleasant odor ; but this, with most other inconveniences, may be removed usually by daily ablutions in clean water, cold or tepid, according to the season, and by the moderate use of per- fumery. Another essential point to be attended to, in connexion with the complexion, is the state of the digestive organs. Indigestion is the prolific parent of a vast proportion of “ the numerous ills that flesh is heir to,” and is certainly destructive to the beauty of the human coun- tenance. It is much to be regretted that the subject of diet and regimen is not better understood, and more rigorously attended to, than it is for the most part among American ladies. The formation of bile and perspiration go on in simultaneous order ; and are in- creased or diminished according to the heat or cold of the climate, and other circumstances. During the earlier periods of digestion, there is a diminution of perspiration, but the action is restored when the bile flows in upon the digested food, for a due proportion of bile is indispensable to the process of digestion, though a redundancy of that fluid destroys the energy of the digestive organs. A sallow or livid complexion, with a hard and dtv skin, is the certain indicationof a deficiency of bile ; when the skin is greasy, and exhibits a prone ness to unduly perspire, the bile is too abundant. In both these cases the application of cosmetics is useless, and very likely to produce dangerous or fatal consequences. Medical advice should be imme- diately resorted to. It may not be improper to remind the fair, that the healthy and del- icate teints of the complexion are liable to be seriously injured by too much exposure to the sun and air, though too much careful conceal- ment from these is almost as fatal to beauty. A moderate exposure to the influence of the light and mild air of the mornings, in summer and autumn, ripens beauty, and gives to it an appearance of a more delicate lustre and heightened charms, just as a due share of air and sunshine is indispensable to the ripeness and perfection of fruits and flowers , while a reckless exposure of the “ human face divine” to the night blasts of Boreas and the scorching rays of the sun, will as effectually destroy its beauty, as the same causes would blast and destroy the flavor and the brilliancy of those fruits and flowers to which wo have before alluded. The next subjects demanding consideration are the hair, eyes, and teeth. No one who is not dead to the charms of beauty can be in- sensible to the attractive force of these fascinating portions of the kuman frame. We notice first the hair. “ If a woman have long hair, it is a glory to her, for her hair is given her for a covering.” So says the apostle: and tasteless indeed must they be who would call in question the correctness of the as- sertion. We often wonder who first contrived to hide this beautiful and heaven-bestowed ornament, under the senseleSs and unhealthy thing called a cap—an article of attire that has nothing to recommend it but its absurdity, and clearly only proper for invalids, or women who have progressed to the shady side of sixty. The hair of a young lady, turned up with a huge comb, or indeed with a comb of any kind, in all the precision of Dutch deformity, is almost as bad as the cap, and we shall hail with Relight the day when this native adornment shall be allowed to fall in graceful ringlets, “ unconfined and free,” over the snowy shoulders and swan-like necks of our American fair—alike models of beauty, grace, and loveliness. The hair may be considered as the natural crown of the human figure. It grows from a bulbous root, situated in the cellular mom- oranu; and from this root, the down or hairs spring, and bind tognth-er the general system, passing the thin layers of the skin and per- forating the network at very acute angles. The hairs spring from the root in pairs or in threes, and each is composed of a hollow tube filled with a fluid which gives it its distinctive color. In elderly per- sons, this fluid becomes dried up, and then the hair appears transpa- rent : this is what is called gray hairs. The hair is naturally of a soft and silk-like texture, and falls, if due attention be paid to it, in graceful curls over the neck and bosom. In some persons a natural parting of the hair is very observable ; t divides from the crown of / the head to the forehead, upon either side of which it clusters and curls in graceful luxuriance over the temples; this line may be said to be continued along the nose, and give additional interest and effect to the countenance. If there be any truth in the science of which Lavater was the brightest ornament, this natural direction of the hair is no mean mark of distinction, indicating, as it does, mildness and sweetness of disposition, combined with firmness and an elevated mind. In that unrivalled triumph of native sculpture, Baily’s statue of Eve at the fountain, the graceful disposition of the hair is beyond all praise, and may fairly claim comparison with the most finished pro- duction of ancient art. That this ornament of the head may be as graceful in appearance as its exquisite formation renders it capable of becoming, it must be kept as free from scurf, and other impurities, as possible ; for this purpose it should be combed frequently, and occasionally cleaned with ivory powder or bran. Should these means fail, it is fair to conclude that some disease exists, or is in a state of formation. In this case, active remedies should be applied, if possible, under the direction of a skilful medical adviser: and during the progress of such treatment, the head should be lightly covered ; an excess of either cold or heat being in such cases to be avoided. It is also advisable for those la- dies who engage in domestic affairs to wear a thin cap, while engaged in any sort of work from which dust might arise and mix with the perspiration, which always rises from the head during the periods of exertion. A light bonnet is however in this case much to be prefer- red to a cap. We come next to speak of the eyes—these “ windows of the soul,” which have so powerful an influence, and which have in so many instances decided the fate and turned the scale of human des-liny. “ The speaking eye,” the seat at once of intellect and love, has been sung by the poets, and commanded the utmost skill of the painter to transfer its lustre to his canvass ; but all have failed in pro- ducing even a shadow of that influence which has operated upon the heart and decided the actions of man, from the living, melting, flush- ing, glowing intellectuality of the organ itself. Among the ancients, the eye commanded admiration and respect, and with us, as with them, a large pupil is generally considered a mark of beauty. Thus, the “ ox-eyed,” is an epithet applied by Ho- mer, as a distinguished feature in the beauty of the goddess Juno. It is, however, rarely connected with robust or general health, and is in some instances a decided indication of bodily weakness. It is of vast importance to preserve the eyes from injury, espe- cially in youth : light blue are the strongest, and can bear the long- est continuance of exertion. Eyes of gray color are also strong ; but an excess of light and intense gazing are sure to injure the iris. This important portion of the organ is placed for protection behind a horn-like covering, called the cornea, upon which specks are some- times visible. The iris is of different colors—from which circum- stance it has derived its name—and the lighter it is, the greater de- gree of exertion the eye is capable of sustaining. There are many mischievous practices indulged in, in reference to the eyes, which should be carefully avoided, as they never fail, soon- er or later, to bring their own punishment with them. Constantly using glasses, accustoming the eyes to look intensely on very minute objects, using one eye more than another, reading in a glare of light, and wearing very small bonnets, are certain to be followed by disas- trous consequences. Even the wearing of a veil has proved injuri- ous, from its exposing the organ of sight to too sudden transitions ; and though these articles of dress are by no means to he dispensed with, yet ladies who wear them should counteract their evil tenden- cies by frequently bathing their eyes in some astringent solution. That of strong green tea is often found very beneficial. As we are not writing a medical treatise, we can not go further into the subject In the last chapter will be found some excellent suggestions for the treatment of the organ, when afflicted by disease ; and we advise all who have the opportunity, to make themselves well acquainted with this portion of our frame ; which the more we consider it, the morewe shall feel disposed to acknowledge—is “ fearfully and wonder- fully mad#.” Having considered the hair and eyes, the teeth next require our consideration. The beauty of even and well-set rows of teeth has been admitted from ages the most remote, and the compliments paid to this so highly valued feature, have gone to the utmost limits of nonsense and extravagance. Still, this ornament of the human countenance is by no means to be despised; and no lady who is de- sirous of pleasing, will neglect to give to the teeth a due share of care and attention. Indeed the Power who conferred the gift, has plainly intimated his will, that we should bestow due pains upon its preser- vation, by affixing the penalty of toothache to continual neglect. The teeth are composed of two parts : the root, which is fixed in the socket of the jaw, and the crown, which is covered with enamel, which is naturally beautifully white, hard, and crystalline. In the teeth there is an orifice, which passes right up into the crown, and contains the blood-vessels and nerves proper to the organ. Hard as they appear, no part of the body is more liable to premature decay; and as they are of such essential use, not merely for the mastication of food, but also in the proper transmission of sounds, the utmost care should be taken to keep them sound and entire. They should be washed and brushed twice a day with soft water, and the mouth should be constantly rinsed after every meal. The teeth are subject to various causes of decay, which should be removed as soon as they begin to make their appearance, b irst, there is an accumulation of food round the neck of the teeth, which leads to the formation of ca- nes, and a pollution of the breath ; this is prevented by the constant use of the brush and water, before recommended. Then there is a greenish substance, which is sometimes found deposited on the upper part of the tooth, immediately below the gums. This must be re- moved by a little pumice-stone, powdered, and applied every morning with a small sponge. Another cause of decay is the deposite of tartar, by which the teeth are covered with a yellow or brown cover- ing, which occasions them to become loose, and the gums to inflame. This tartar is at first soft, and easily removeable, but it soon becomes hard, and then the aid of the dentist is required, and much pain is frequently the consequence. The teeth are sure to be injured by medicines containing any of the numerous preparations of mercury or by a too free indulgence in the pleasures of the tabte. Much in-jury 18 also done to them by applying them to purposes for which they were never intended, and by using gold, silver, or steel toothpicks, instead of a quill—the only toothpick that ought to be employed—if, perchance, one should be occasionally needed. We again repeat, that if ease, beauty, and a sweet breath, be objects at all desired, due attention must be paid to the state of the teeth and gums. Indeed, we are almost converts to the opinion of Lavater, that “ an epitome of the moral character might be drawn from a sight of the teeth.” At all events, let the blooming fair one recollect that neglected and tartarized teeth will destroy the fascination of the most angelic smile that evei played upon a female countenance. We have all felt the enchantment of a smile ; and the charms of “ rosy lips” and “ fragrant breath” are so well known, and so justly appreciated, that it would be a work of supererogation to employ marry words about them. The lips should be of a “ rich cherry ruby teint,” and the breath “ as sweet as violets.” But neither of these can be hers who is regardless of her general health, or of those at- tentions to her charms which are so essential to their beauty and preservation. Exercise in the open air, regularity as to food, early rising, and bathing at all proper times, are more powerful antidotes than the most celebrated medicines ; and can alone secure that sweet- ness of the breath, and those lovely lips, which all feel to be so indis- pensable to the perfection of female beauty. We shall next proceed to offer a few remarks upon the hands and feet. That a finely-rounded arm, and a delicate and well-formed hand, are essential to the perfection of beauty, no one will venture to deny. Small extremities are much valued, and care should be taken, as much as possible, to preserve their native symmetry and delicacy from becoming distorted, coarse, or impaired. Of course, the less the hands are engaged in laborious employments, the more soft and deli- cate they will appear; they should never be exposed to scorching heats or chilling blasts, as these destroy their beauty, almost beyond renovation. The hands of ladies who are exempt from any kind of domestic drudgery, have generally a peculiar sensitiveness of touch, which is of great advantage, especially to those ladies who are de- sirous of excelling in music, drawing, or needlework. Let not, how- ever, the most delicate hand be deemed too delicate to alleviate human suffering, or to administer consolation and assistance in the hour of •tckneas, calamity, or death. The beauty of the hand consists muchin the appearance of the nails ; and the state of these must be care- fully attended to. Cleanliness, and a due regard to the length they are permitted to grow, are all that is required to keep them in proper order. Nor is an attention to the feet of less importance than that whicu is bestowed upon the hands. The foot is one of the most complex and curious productions of Creative wisdom and power ; aud yet it is too often regarded as a common thing, only possessing beauty when art has deprived it of all proper pretensions to symmetry or grace. People wash their feet in a manner so careless, as to induce the be- lief that from an injudicious use of water no possible ill can arise ; whereas, the evils connected with wet or damp feet afe innumerable. Then a young lady goes out in thin shoes, which are as incapable of preserving her feet from the effects of damp or cold as so much gray paper; and she not unfrequently exposes her health in this manner, just after she has emerged from the heated assembly, or the excite- ment of the ball-room. The frequency of consumptions and prema- ture decay are not to be wondered at, while such reckless disregard of the most common rules of prudence continue to be tolerated and looked upon as fashionable. Another point, in which a servile adhe- rance to the commands of the changeful goddess has produced incal- culable mischief, is the supposed elegance of small boots and shoes. We say, the supposed elegance, because nothing is really elegant which does not combine ease and comfort with neatness of appear- ance. The penalty annexed to this absurd custom is both a certain and a painful one. By a kind of natural rebellion, the foot confined in a small shoe is found to enlarge, the pressure upon the bones and blood-vessels occasions the most excruciating pain, and all power of walking with ease and elegance is in consequence destroyed. Add to this the pain arising from those disagreeable appendages to this foolish attempt to improve the work of the Creator, corns, which an undue 'confinement of the feet always produces, and we hope that enough has been said to convince every lady who is desirous to pre- serve at the same time the beauty and usefulness of the feet, that she must allow to the blood-vessels and the muscles that full play which ia so essential to their useful and healthy development. Lastly, she who is desirous of presenting her personal charms in the most becoming and agreeable manner, must pay a proper regard to the orderly disposition of her whole figure, and to the general carriage of the person. Deformities of the body arise very frequently from accidents, concealed or unattended to in early childhood. For these, it is next to impossible to find a remedy ; but there are other causes in constant operation, which, if not carefully guarded against, will entirely destroy the symmetry and beauty of the human form. Care should be taken never to keep the body, either by night or by day, in a constrained or unnatural position, longer than any particular circumstances may render it absolutely necessary. Lying constantly on one side, and with the head high, is almost certain to produce deformity. The binding of the body, so as to impede muscular mo- tion, or the undue exercise of one particular part rather than another, is at all times Tnischievous, and should be resolutely guarded against. The natural development of the figure, untutored by fictitious aid, is the true standard of beauty; and all attempts to improve upon nature in this respect will prove abortive and vain. The carriage of the body should be easy and unconstrained, the head held even and erect, the hands disposed gracefully in their natural position, and the feet placed firm on the ground This general carriage, with a well-formed figure, intelligent eyes, luxuriant hair, an open countenance, and an obliging disposition, constitutes physical beauty, and nothing less than this deserves the name. CHAPTER II. OBSERVATIONS ON DRESS. / The subject of a lady’s dress may, at first sight, appear an inter- minable theme ; and yet it is not so in reality. We propose, in this chapter, to exhibit it in its general and leading principles, and to leave the minutia; of details to that which can alone regulate them with propriety, namely, good sense, united to a correct taste, and a proper regard to personal convenience. One thing to be carefully avoided is, the undue solicitude as to per- sonal appearance, which leads to indecision and fretfulness, and occasions a much greater sacrifice of time than is at all compatible with the due discharge of other and more important duties. She who ' spends too much time in consulting her mirror, will assuredly spend too little in looking into her own heart; and she may safely calculatethat the most finished external adorning will fail to please^ where the inward ornaments of intellectual and moral worth are neglected or forgotten. Still, as a fine picture derives additional beauty from judicious framing, so the charms of a beautiful and accomplished female be- come heightened and enhanced by a proper regard to the elegance of dress and attire ; and on this account it is that mankind have come to the unanimous conclusion, that where dress is entirely neglected, or but very slightly regarded, no general or abiding mental excellence can be reasonably expected. The slave of fashion is perhaps one of the most pitiable objects in creation ; and is generally acting wrong, from an undue solicitude to do what, in the realms of the unstable goddess, is pronounced to be right. Nothing can be more absurd than the adoption of every new style of dress, the moment it makes its appearance. But then the other extreme should be avoided, namely, of never adopting a new style until it has become an old one. The true standard of propriety is a medium one—neither to adopt every rising novelty of the day. nor reject a becoming compliance with those alterations and changes which reflection and judgment pronounce to be desirable. In the arrangements for this portion of the toilet, three things are indispen- sable. First, choose only such dresses as harmonize correctly with the figure and complexion. Second, let your dress be in perfect ac- cordance with that station of society in which Providence has ap- pointed you to move. Third, let ease, elegance, and simplicity, be the leading characteristics of your attire. The lady who attends to these three rules, will never commit any serious error in the arrange- ment of her dress. Some persons have a feverish dread of being thought subject to the ravages of time, and make the most ridiculous efforts to be thought younger than they really are. This species of affectation is as pitia- ble as it is ridiculous and contemptible ; and, besides this, it is sure to prove abortive in the end. On this subject Sir Richard Steel has some remarks so pertinent, that we shall offer no apology for their in- sertion in this place. “ The female world, as being the more ornamental part of man- kind, are naturally addicted to innovations and inventions of this kind. I had an acquaintance once with a lady, who professed to me, that made it her study but instead of laying on upon her face differ-ent colors*and daubing herself with an artificial complexion, which (as she well remarked), besides other disadvantages, obliges to a care and anxiety to avoid all encounters that may either expose or taint the varnish, takes away the natural teint of the skin, so as to make it frightful even to the owner upon first waking in the morning, and ren- ders her offensive to another sense, as well as the sight,'of all who approach her. Her manner, then, was, in the beginning of the year, to have her face drawn in a little oval, extremely like, and without flattery : she had many dresses painted on a sort of isinglass, which she could clap upon the face of this oval, and observe what colors, or subdivisions of colors, besf. became her complexion. I have seen her make the same face bear a becoming sadness, a downcast inno cence, a heedless gayety, or a respectful attention, according to the different lights and shades that were thrown upon it, by the applica- tion of the several dresses round the head and neck. This gave my friend the reputation of being the most careless, unaffected creature in the world ; and yet, said they, how everything becomes her! Nothing at all artful, yet surpassing all the art in the world. The truth of which was, that she never attempted to disguise nature, but to adorn it; and she easily surpassed those who studied to be what they were not, by endeavoring only to appear to the utmost advantage what she was. She would, indeed, triumph in this judicious manner of dressing upon occasion, not without some insolence...........This ju- dicious young woman was longer young than any I have ever known ; and by following nature, was never out of fashion to her dying day She ever led her own year of life ; and by never endeavoring to ap- pear as young as those of fewer years, appeared always much young- er than those of her own.” It is almost impqfsible to overrate the excellent judgment and moral resolution of this beauty of the seventeenth century. She had indeed learned one of the noblest arts, that of preferring the reality to the appearance of the thing, and adopted a plan for the retention of her own beauty, and the esteem of all whose esteem was worth possessing, infinitely more sure than any which fashion ever invent- ed could have secured to her, even for an hour. Good taste dictates, that the dress should be so well, chosen and arranged, as to harmonize well with the complexion, and to soften and throw into partial shade, not to disfigure or conceal the natural ful- ness and grace of the form. The hair should be kept in the mostperfect order, arid be disposed over the forehead, neck, and shoulders, with the most becoming grace, but with as few artificial aids as pos- sible ; a simple wreath of flowers, or brilliants, is decidedly the most Decoming and appropriate ornament. In the arrangement of the hair, it will also be proper to pay a proper regard to the general form of the head ; that style may be beautiful in one person, which would be absurd and entirely destitute of propriety in another. Those ladies who are petite in stature, and have small features, ought to avoid the tendency to display their tresses in the same proportion as is not only becoming, but necessary, in those who are of an entirely different style of beauty. The hair, in these cases, should be rather restrain- ed, or they will have that dwarfish and insignificant appearance, which is so offensive to taste and genuine sensibility. Whatever may be the prevailing fashion, ladie? whose faces present a round or full ap- pearance, should never relinquish the lovely ornament of clustering curls, drooping to the neck. No fashionable arrangement could com- pensate for the loss. The parting of the tresses, which is done gen- erally in the middle, should also be regulated by its natural growth. If low on the forehead, and high on the temples, they should be part- ed on one side; but if too distant from the eyebrows, part them in the centre. In reference to the skin, we would observe, that paint should never be resorted to ; it is a senseless piece of hypocrisy, betraying a mean and degraded mind; and will, in most cases, destroy that beauty it was intended to improve. Some preparations for the improvement of the skin are necessary, and may be used with advantage, but paint —never. In that state of intellectual and moral superiority to which we are approaching, the use of it will be avoided with the same care, as that with which we should fly from a destructive pestilence Sometimes natural defects in the formation of the neck are attempted to be concealed by a profusion of jewelry. This is a ridiculous piece of affectation, which is never entirely, and seldom even par- tially successful. In such cases, a neat ruffle, reaching to the cheek, would be fir preferable, and have the advantage of always appearing neat and becoming. If the formation of the neck be faultless, a co- ral, amber, or diamond necklace, to which some becoming, and not over large pendent ornament may be attached, is all the adornment that can be reasonably desired. Of course, the style and breadth of the necklace will vary with the prevailing fashion; and they mwiaLso be properly accommodated to the person of the wearer. The necklace which would be highly ornamental to a lady with a long neck and falling shoulders, would look ridiculous, if assumed by one whose shoulders and neck were exactly the reverse. In the arrangement of dresses for the body, it is most desirable, that the extremes of the prevailing favorites should be carefully noted, and when found to trench upon the dictates of becoming modesty and decency, should be as carefully avoided. In the width of the skirt, the formation of the body and sleeves, and the general style of trim- ming or ornament, the prevailing fashion may, in most cases, be strictly adhered to. But there are some exceptions. Sometimes the front of the dress is made so high, as completely to conceal both the bosom and neck; and then the wind of fashion changes, and the body is cut so low, as to border upon the most gcpss indelicacy. Both these extremes are at variance with good taste, and should be resolutely avoided. Sometimes the dresses of young ladies are so made, as to show the full beauty of the bosom and shoulders ; this is consistent with the strictest propriety, but the dress should be so formed as to lay tightly upon the fore part of the shoulder ; to allow it to fall upon the upper arm, is as unsightly as can be conceived. If wearing flounces to a dress be the prevailing mode, a person of low stature should never adopt them. They may be an ornament to the robes of a tall lady, but never otherwise. Nor must a slender figure ever ar- ray herself in a scant or narrow dress ; fulness in her attire is essen- tial to her genteel appearance. If head-dresses be worn, it will be of great advantage to study the models of antiquity, and the practices of females living in different ages, which have come down to us. But in this department of the toilet, two things must be especially regarded : first, never to adopt a head-dress, merely because it looks well where we find it, but to consider whether it would blend harmoniously with tho style of cos- tume prevalent in our own time ; and second, to consider the cast of features, as well as the head-dress ; to clap a Grecian head-dress, however becoming in itself, upon an anti-Grecian head, would entire ly destroy its effect. We give this as a general rule. The head- dress must be in accordance with the general costume, and must blend harmoniously with the individual state of beauty possessed by '-lie wearer, or it can never look either elegant or becoming. It is almost impossible to speak definitively of colors and teint*they are so various, and their beauty depends so much upon their tasteful and judicious arrangement. “ Generally speaking” says an eminent writer, “ trimmings will bear a greater richness of coloring than the principal material of the dress ; the breadth of which is apt entirely to subdue its decorations, if they be not a little more power- ful in tcint. But it is a grave error to endow the minor parts of the costume with an undue superiority over the rest; it should never be forgotten that the trimming is intended to embellish the dress, rather than that the dress should sink into a mere field for the display of the trimming. Sufficient importance should always be given to the latter, so that it may enhance the beauty, add to the richness, or harmonize with the purity and neatness of the former ; but if its colors be too strong, or even when of the proper shade, if the material he too pro- fuse, or not of a quality sufficiently delicate—it gives to the wearer either a frittered, gaudy, or coarse appearance, according to the na- ture of the fault. The same teint which looks well in a delicate material will not become an article made of ‘ sterner stuff.’ ” These remarks, if properly attended to, will prevent any very seri- ous departure from propriety of color in the larger articles of dress. In the choice of flowers and jewellery, much judgment and taste are required. As to the use of flowers, too great a profusion is to be avoided ; and the same remark will apply, with equal force, to the other articles named. Articles of this kind should be so chosen as to suit the complexion, and to adorn the dress. Flowers of a brilliaut hue should be worn sparingly; those of more delicate teints may be used in rather more abundance ; but in all cases, when flowers fabri- cated to imitate nature, not only in shape, but in color, are worn, thev should always be so worn in combination with leaves of the natural hues : without this appendage, flowers had far better never be intro- duced at all. We close our remarks on dress by referring to the sad mistakes which are often made in reference to those minor, but by no mean? unimportant, articles of attire—bonnets, veils, gloves, ribands, and shoes. The bonnet should be, in shape and trimming, in accord- ance with the prevailing fashion, when that is in tolerable keep- ing with taste and elegance; where it steps beyond those bounds it should be rigorously disregarded. Veils are either white or black and dan be worn worked, or plain, as the prevalence of the particulai «tyle may determine. Gloves are an important article of femaledress, and no lady should ever appear in public without them, except at meals. Gloves should be of a good material, and of the most deli- cate teint possible. The hues of the article must be frequently changed ; as to wear them on all occasions of one color is an ap- proach to vulgarity of which no lady should allow herself to be even suspected. Ribands must be chosen of clouded or neutral teints, to harmonize with the colors of the dress, and the complexion of the wearer; flaming and gaudy colors should be especially avoided. Another thing to be observed is, that due attention should be paid to the season of the year, especially during the spring and autumn. For want of proper care in this respect, the most fatal consequences frequently ensue. In one instance, warm clothing is thrown off with too great precipitancy; and in another, parties continue to wear the light dresses of summer when the damps and chills of September have given sufficient warning that colds and consumptions are stalk- ing abroad with insatiate greediness to seize unwary victims When the real or supposed demands of fashion involve a sacrifice of health, or endanger life, let the mandate be sternly and rigorously refused. The shoe is an article of much importance ; it should be made exactly to fit the foot, but by no means to impede the due action of the muscular powers and blood-vessels. Colored shoes are worn, but we consider them anything but elegant: a delicate pink, or light blue silk, are the only allowable ones ; and we think that white or black satin are decidedly preferable. After these, kid and bronze kid hold the first place : and we only ask the admirers (a numerous class, we ad- mit) of colored shoes to contrast the one kind with the other, and we are satisfied that a large majority will admit the correctness of the judgment we have ventured to express. Indeed, we may say of taste, as Demosthenes said of action, as an adjunct to eloquence, that it is “ the first, second, and third grand requisite, combining the triple qualification of propriety, neatness, and elegance.” Let this be con- sulted, together with the most approved models, and the arrangements of the toilet will be complete.CHAPTER III. PREPARATION OF VARIOUS ARTICLES FOR THE TOILET, NECESSARY FOR THE PRESERVATION OR RESTORATION OF BEAUTY. THE COUNTENANCE. To preserve to the complexion that freshness and brilliancy of ap- pearance which are so necessary to its beauty, and to remove from the skin those incidental evils to which it is exposed by a variety of cir- cumstances, is an object of considerable impoitance, and requiring great care. All applications of cosmetics, and other preparations containing mineral substances, should (unless in extreme cases when they must be applied under the management and direction ot skilful medical advice) be carefully avoided. Any transient advantage they may possess is more than counterbalanced by the inevitable ruin they never fail, sooner or later, to produce. The receipts given in this chapter are of at least a harmless—-and in most instances they will be found of a beneficial—character, hav- ing been recommended by eminent medical authorities. PERFUMERY. Lavender Water.—1 ounce of English oil of lavender and bergamotte ; 1 pint of rectified spirits of wine; 4 cloves. Shake well together, let it stand for a month, then add 2 oz. of distilled water, and distil. Lavender Water.—Take rectified spirits of wine, half a pint; essential oil of lavender, 2 drachms; otto of roses, 5 drops. Mix all together in a bottle, and cork it for use. Eau de Cologne.—38 drops of essence of cedral; 38 ditto bergamotte; 38 ditto oranges; 38 ditto citron; 32 ditto neroli; 26 ditto remain ; 26 ditto meline; 1 pint of spirits of wine, 32 degrees over proof. Mix, and distil. Odor Delectabilis.—Take 4 ounces of distilled rose water; 4 ounces of orange-flower water; 1 drachm of oil of cloves; 1 drachm of English oil of lavender; 2 drachms of oil of bergamotte; 2 grains of musk; 1 pint of spirits of wine. Macerate thoroughly, and add 1 drachm of essence of musk. Aromatic Vinf.gar.—4 ounces of dried tops of rosemary; 4 ounces of dried leaves of sage; 4 ounces of dried flowers of lavender; half an ounce of cloves; 3 drachms of camphor; 6 pints of distilled vinegar. Macerate fourteen days, with heat, and filter. Rose Water.—Put some roses into water, add to them a few drops of acid; the vitriolic acid seems to be preferable to any; the water will soon assume both the cobr and perfume of the roses.Eau d’Anoe.—Pound in a mortar 15 cloves and 1 pound of cinnamon, and put the whole into water, with 4 grains of aniseseed; let it stand over a charcoal fire twenty-four hours, then strain off the liquor, and put it up for use. This perfume is most excellent, and will do for the hands, face, and hair, to which it communi- cates a very agreeable scent. TO REMOVE FRECKLES. Freckles are occasioned by exposure to heat, and give to the com plexion a very disagreeable appearance. They are removed by the following applications, the surface of the skin having been previously softened by a little mild balsam or emollient paste:— Freckle Paste.—1 ounce of bitter almonds; 1 ounce of barley flour. Mil with a sufficient quantity of honey to make the whole into a smooth paste, with which the face, particularly where the freckles appear, is to be anointed at night, and the paste washed off in the morning. Freckle Wash.—Take 1 drachm of muriatic acid; half pint of rain water; half teaspoonful of spirit of lavender. Mix them well together, and apply, twc or three times a day, to the freckles, with a camel’s-hair brush. Purifying Wash for the Skin.—Take 1 teaspoonful of liquor of potass; 2 ounces and a half of pure water; a few drops of eau de Cologne. Mix and apply as above. If these means do not prove effectual, it is plain that the blood oi bile is in a state of disorder, and recourse must be had to internal and more active remedies. sunburn. Sunburn and freckles are of the same nature, and generally orrgi nate in the same causes. If sunburn arises solely from external heat, the following remedies will, in most cases, prove effectual:— Lemon Cream for Sunburn and Freckles.—Put two spoonfuls of fresh cream into half a pint of new milk; squeeze into it the juice of a lemon, and half a glass of brandy, a little alum, and loaf-sugar; boil the whole, skim it well, and when cool, it is fit for use. Grape Lotion for Sunburn.—Dip a bunch of green grapes in a basin of water; sprinkle it with powdered alum and salt mixed together; wrap it in paper, and bake it under hot ashes; then express the remaining juice, and wash the face with the liquor. Preventive wash for Sunburn.—Take 2 drachms of borax; 1 drachm of Roman alum; 1 drachm of camphor; half ounce of sugar candy; 1 pound of ox gall. Mix, and stir well together, and repeat the stirring three or four times a day, until the mixture becomes transparent. Then strain it through filtering pa- per, and it is fit for use. PIMPLES. Pimples appear frequently on the face, especially on the sides of the nose : when full, they must be pierced with a fine needle, and thematter entirely pressed out. This done, the following preparation usually prevents their return :— t Take 1 ounce of bitter almonds; 1 ounce of barley flour. Mix them with honey, until they form a smooth paste, and anoint the skin at night. A little gentle friction with the hand, covered with a soit glove, is often found to be of essential service. Small red pimples are of fre- quent recurrence, and very troublesome, but it is dangerous to remove them by repellant applications : they are produced by various causes, such as a surfeit, drinking cold milk, or water, when in a state of un- natural heat, or eating cold vegetables. When they arise from these causes, they become fixed, and continue occasionally to make their appearance to old age. They are almost the certain results of glut- tony and intemperance, and are sometimes produced by hot rooms or violent exercise. Dr. Darwin mentions a lady who became afflicted with them from drinking vinegar. Persons so afflicted should by all means avoid the excitinu cause, whatever it may be. The following application has been known to afford relief: Dr. Bateman’s Sulphur Wash.—Break 1 ?unce of sulphur, and uour over it 1 quart of boiling water; allow it to infuse for twelve or fourteen hours, and apply it to the face, two or three times a day, for a fortnight or three weeks. In these cases, a strict regard to diet is of the utmost consequence and should be most strictly attended to. • Wash Foe Livid Buttony Pimple.—Dissolve 2| grains of oxymuriate of mer- cury in 4 ounces of spirits of wine: enclose in stopped vial. RINGWORMS. Ringworms on the face arise from various causes ; and when they have once made their appearance, the only thing to be done is to keep the bowels moderately open, and let them take their course They however invariably give notice of their appearance, by the fol lowing symptoms: “ Fever, shivering pains in the limbs, headache, and flushings in the face.” The spot on which the ringworm is about to appear, becomes stiff and tingling, which is followed by inflamma- tion. The following lotion, if applied in time, may act as a pre- ventive :— Strawberry Lotion.—Put into a bottle half a pint of brandy, and as many itrawberries as it will hold; cover the mouth with a piece of bladder, and let it remain exposed to the sun for a week. Strain it through a linen cloth, add a few more strawberries as before to the liquid, and half an ounce of camphor. Soak a pledget of lint in the mixture, and apply it to the parts.WRINKLES. % Wrinkles are the certain precursors of advancing years, and can not wholly be prevented ; but the followiitg may be found useful, in connexion with regular habits, and moderately early hours, in arrest- ing their progress :— For Removing Wrinkles.—Take 2 ounces of the juice of onions, 2 ounces of the white lily, 2 ounces of Narbonne honey, and 1 ounce of white wax. Put the whole into a new earthen pipkin until the wax is melted, then take the pipkin otf the fire, and continue stirring briskly until it grows cold. This should be applied on going to bed, and allowed to remain on until the morning. Lotion for Wrinkes.—Take of the second water of barley 1 pint, and strain it through a piece of fine linen; add 12 drops of the balm of Mecca; shake it well together until the balm is thoroughly incorporated with the water, which will be effected when the water nssumes a whitish or turgid appearance. Before ap- plying, wash the face with soft water: if used once a day, it will beautify the face, preserve the freshness of youth, and give a surprising brilliancy to the skin THE HAIR. Palma Christi Oil.—Take 1 ounce of palma christi oil; add oil of bcrga motte or lavender to scent it. Let it be well brushed into the hair twice a day for two or three months—particularly applying it to those parts where it may be most desirable to render the hair luxuriant. This is a simple and valuable oil, and not in the hands of any monopolist. Macassar Oil.—Take 3 quarts of common oil; half a pint of spirits of wine; 3 ounces of cinnamon powder; 2 ounces of bergamotte. Heat them together in a large pipkin; then remove it from the fire; add four small pieces of alkanet root, aad keep it closely covered for several hours; let it then be filtered through a tunnel lined with filtering paper. To Darken the Hair.—Wash the head with spring water, and comb the hair in the sun, having dipped the comb in oil of tartar. Do this about three times a day, and in less than a fortnight the hair often becomes quite black. THE EYES. Anodyne Eye-wateh.—Put 40 drops of the sedative solution of opium into 4 ounces of elder-flower water, and add 3 drachms of the best acetated liquor of ammonia; mix, and apply it to the eye by means of an eye-cup; or from a few drops to a teaspoonful of both brandy and laudanum may be dropped into a wine- glass of fresh water, accommodating its strength to the state of the eyes. THE TEETH. To fill op decayed Tekth.—Take a small quantity of silver leaf or powder, and quicksilver. Rub them together until the silver be dissolved. Put into a chamois leather bag, press out the superfluous quicksilver, and make a paste of what remains. Mixed Tooth Powder.—Finely-powdered prepared chalk 4 parts; ditto pure starch 4 ditto; ditto myrrh 3 ditto; ditto ginger 1 ditto; cream of tartar 6 ditto. Flower of hivmder and sugar at pleasure, and mix well together.Parisian Dentifrice.—Take 2 ounces of powder of myrrh • 8 ounces of Pe- nman bark; 32 drops of oil of cinnamon; 32 drops of oil of cloves- 24 ounces of prepared chalk; 8 ounces of orris powder; 3 ounces of rose pink.' Mix weli together. Vegetable Tooth Powder.—Fine powder of Florentine iris 5 parts; ditto pure starch 3 ditto; ditto quinine 2 ditto; ditto hyoscyamus 1 ditto. Sugar to the taste, and perfume the iris with otto of roses; carmine may be used to color it. THE LIPS AND BREATH. Lady E. Conyngham’s Lip Honey.—Take 2 ounces of fine honey; i ounce of purified wax; half an ounce of silver litharge; half an ounce of myrrh. Mix them over a slow fire, perfuming with milk of roses, eau de Cologne, or any per- fume you may prefer. Balsam for Chapped Lips.—Two spoonfuls of clarified honey, with a few drops of lavender water, or any other perfume. Mix, and anoint the lips frequently. Baume a l’Antique.—Take 4 ounces of the oil of roses; half an ounce of white wax; half an ounce of spermaceti. Melt them in a glass vessel, and stir them with a wooden spoon—pour it out into glass cups lor use. Hemedy for Bad Breath.—Take 8 drops of muriatic acid, in half a tumbler of spring water, and add a little lemon peel or juice to suit the palate. Let this mixture be taken three times a day for some weeks, and, if useful, then continued occasionally. the hands and feet. Warts and chilblains are of frequent occurrence, and are extremely troublesome. Warts mhy be removed by rubbing them every morning with a small portion of lunar caustic, or by the application of ink. Chilblains should be treated as follows : At their very first appearance, the part affected should be plunged into water, as cold as possible and then be rubb«d with flannel. When inflammation or swelling has begun, they must hare ammoniacal plaster applied to them ; or bo rubbed with cajeput liniment. In cases where the skin has been broken, and a humor is discharged, it is necessary to apply a poultice 1 after the inflammation has subsided, the place should be covered by •» mercurial plaster spread on leather. PAINTS AND COSMETICS. As we consider all kinds of paint, fabricated from mineral sub. stances, to be fraught with the most dangerous consequences, we shall give no receipts for the preparation of them. The use of them, in most cases, is both morally wrong and physically injurious. If, from the operation of any temporary cause, the skin has become discol- ored, an attention to the state of the general health, with the use of some of the harmless preparations before recommended, will restore it To impart a bloom to the pale or wan cheok of beamy, may some>times be allowable ; and in that case, rouge, or unadulterated carmine are the only substances that ought to be employed. As it is desira- ble that rouge should be prepared under a lady’s own inspection (and we advise the same rule to be applied to all other preparations), we give the receipt. Rouge.—Half a pound of levigated French chalk, mixed with 2 ounces of car- mine, is a common preparation. Cosmetic Juice.—Make a hole in a lemon, fill it with sugar-candy, and close it nicely with gold leaf, applied over the rind that was cut out, then roast the lemon in hot ashes; when required, squeeze out the juice, and wash the face in a napkin dipped in the liquid. It is said to cleanse the skin and brighten the complexion. Virgin Milk. Dissolve equal parts of benzoin and storax in a sufficient quan- tity of spirits of wine, and drop in a little balm of Gilead. Denmark Wash for the Face.—Take equal parts of the seeds of gourd, pumpion melon, and cucumber, of bean flour, and of fresh cream; beat all up together,’ with sufficient milk to make an ointment, and apply it to the face. Paste of Palermo.—Take 1 pound of white soap, half a pint of salad oil, the same quantity of spirits of wine, the juice of 3 lemons, a little silver sand, and a sufficient quantity of whatever perfumes the sense. The oil and soap must be first boiled together in an earthen pipkin. The other ingredients to be added after boiling; and, when cool, amalgamate into a paste with the hands. Corn Plaster.—Take 2 ounces of gum ammoniac; 2 ounces of yellow wax; 6 drachms of verdigris. Melt them together, and spread on a piece of linen, or soft leather—first paring down the corn; let the plaster be renewed in a fort- night, if necessary. Corn Plaster.—Take 1 ounce of turpentine; half an ounce of red lead ; 1 ounce of frankincense; half a pound of white rosin; 1 pint of Florence oil. Boil tkese ingredients in a pipkin, and keep stirring them over a slow fire with an elder stick until it turns black; then turn it out to harden for use. It must be applied by spreading it on a piece of leather oiled all over, and then put to the Jun. Wearing it constantly for some time will effeotualy eradicate the corn.GENTLEMAN’S SCIENCE OF ETIQUETTE. GENERAL OBSERVATIONS. Etiquette is the barrier which society draws around itsel, as a protection against offences the “law” can not touch — it ii a shield against the intrusion of the impertinent, the improper, and the vulgar—a guard against those obtuse persons who, having neither talent nor delicacy, would be continually thrust- ing themselves into the society of men to whom their presence might (from the difference of feeling and habit) be offensive, and even insupportable. Many unthinking persons consider the observance of Etiquette to be nonsensical and unfriendly, as consisting cf unmeaning forms, practised only by the silly and the idle; an opinion which arises from their not having reflected on the reasons that have led to the establishment of certain rules indispensable to the well-being of society, and without which, indeed, it would inevitably fall to pieces, and be destroyed. Much misconstruction and unpleasant feeling arise, especially in country towns, from not knowing what is “expected,” or necessary to be done on certain occasions, resulting sometimes from the prevalence of local customs, with which the world in general are not supposed to be acquainted. Besides, in a mercantile country like our own, people are continually rising in the world. Shopkeepers become mer- chants, and mechanics manufacturers; with the possession of wealth, they acquire a taste for the luxuries of life, expensive 65furniture, gorgeous plate, and also numberless superfluities, with the use of which they are only imperfectly acquainted. But, although their capacities for enjoyment increase, it rarely happens that the polish of their manners keeps pace with the rapidity of their advancement: hence such persons are often painfully reminded that wealth alone is .insufficient to protect them from the mortifications which a limited acquaintance with society entails upon the ambitious. Pride often deters people from seeking the advice of the experienced, when the opportu- nity of receiving it is presented. It is to be hoped that the following remarks will furnish a guide through the intricacies of conventional usage, without risk to the sensitive, or the hu- miliation of publicly proclaiming the deficiencies of an imper- fect education. Jit all cases, the observances of the Metropolis (as the seat of refinement) should be received as the standard of good breeding.CHAPTER I INTRODUCTIONS. Never “introduce” people to each other, without a previous understanding that it will be agreeable to both. There are many reasons why people ought never to be intro- duced to the acquaintance of each other, without the consent of each party previously obtained. A man may suit the taste, and be agreeable enough to one, without being equally so to the rest of his friends—nay, as it often happens, he may be decidedly unpleasing; a stupid person may be delighted with tl\e society of a man of learning or talent, to whom in return such an acquaintance may prove an annoyance and a clog, as one inca- pable of offering an interchange of thought, or an idea worth listening to. But if you should find an agreeable person in private society, who seems desirous of making your acquaintance, there can not be any objection to your meeting his advances half way, although the ceremony of an “introduction” may not have taken place; his presence in your friend’s house being a sufficient guaranty for his respectability, as, of course, if he were an improper per- son he would not be there. Should you, while walking with your friend, meet an ac- quaintance, never introduce them. If you meet a male acquaintance giving his arm to a lady, take off your hat to him, instead of nodding—as this last familiar mode of recognition looks disrespectful toward her. In making ‘ introductions,” take care to present the person of the lower rank to him of the higher: that is, die commoner should be presented to the peer, not the peer to the commoner;Dr. A. to Lord B., not Lord B. to Dr. A. Observe the same rule with ladies — the lady (as a female) claiming the highes* rank, it is to her the gentleman must be presented, not the lady to the gentleman. Be cautious how you take an intimate friend uninvited even to the house of those with whom you may be equally intimate, as there is always a feeling of jealousy that another should share your thoughts and feelings to the same extent as themselves, although good breeding will induce them to behave civilly to your friend on your account. Friendship springs up from sources so subtle and undefinable, that it can not be forced into particular channels; and whenever the attempt has been made, it has usually been unsuccessful. Never make acquaintances in coffee-houses or other public places. As no person who respects himself does so, you may reasonably suspect any advances made to you. An adherence to etiquette is a mark of respect; if a man be worth knowing, he is surely worth the trouble to approach prop- erly. It will likewise relieve you from the awkwardness of being acquainted with people of whom you might at times be ashamed, or be obliged under many circumstances to “cwt.” The act of “>■cutting” can only be justified by some strong instance of bad conduct in the person to be cut; a cold bow, which discourages familiarity without offering insult, is the best mode to adopt toward those with whom an acquaintance is not deemed desirable. An increased observance of ceremony is, however, the most delicate way of withdrawing from an acquaint- ance ; and the person so treated must be obtuse, indeed, who does not take the hint. A neglect of, or adherence to, the forms of society, in others toward yourself, is oftentimes the only way in which you are enabled to judge if your acquaintance be really considered desirable. You will meet with professions of civility and friend- ship in the world as mere matters of course; and were you to act upon what people say, instead of what they do, you wouldrun a risk of being mortified, which no person of proper pride would choose to encounter, especially if the other party be, or assume to be, of higher rank than yourself. We never knew a person, really desirous of forming a friendship with another, neglect, either hy word or deed, the means of accomplishing such an object. It is, however, understood in society, that a person who has been properly introduced to you has some claim on your good offices in future; you can not, therefore, slight him without good reason, and the chance of being called to an account forCHAPTER II LETTERS OF INTRODUCTION. Letters of Introduction are to be considered as certificate! of respectability — as proofs that you are known by the htr ducer to be a proper person to be admitted into the friendly circle of him to whom you are recommended, without the risk, in these days of elegant exterior, of his harboring a swindler, or losing his sil'ver spoons. Many people consider that when they have given a dinner to the stranger they have done enough, and are not required to take any further notice of him, so that, with modern English coldness, “ Letters of Introduction” have been facetiously termed “ Tickets lor Soup,” and many sensitive people have, by these degrading considerations, been prevented from present- ing them. It is true, that among people “comme il faut,” the new-comer is generally welcomed with a dinner—not for the sake of the entertainment, but as a means of presenting him to a fresh society, and of giving him the opportunity of legiti- mately making the acquaintance of his host’s friends invited expressly to meet him ; but, as the only criterion of the estima- tion in which he is heid must be the kind of people asked to meet him, be careful not to wound his feelings by inviting those whom he may be likely to consider his inferiors either in merit or position. If you have letters of introduction from one friend to another, do not take them, but send them, with your card of ad- dress. If he be a gentleman, he will return your visit as soon as possible; at any rate il will give him an option, which by taking your letters in person you do not do. but rather forceyourself upon him whether he will or not. If your letters be on business only, no ceremony is necessary — take them at once. In all such matters never trust to a second that which may be so much better done by yourself. There can not be a more awkward situation for both parties than for one person to be waiting while the other is reading a letter with the endeavor to discover who the stranger may be, or a position in which the bearer looks so foolish, or feels so uncomfortable. Then comes the bow, a cold shake of the hand, with the few civil words of course — and all because you 'ome upon a stranger who is unprepared: therefore, give him time to read the letter you bring, and to consider how he may best show his regard for your introducer by his attentions to yourself. Observe, that “ Letters of Introduction” are never sealed by well-bred people : the seal of the writer is attached to the en- velop— requiring only a little wax to close it—at the option of the person to whom it is confided. If a gentleman be the bearer of an “introduction” to you, leave a card with him without fail, if it be only as an acknowl- edgment of having received your friend’s letter ; there is no rudeness so great as to leave it unnoticed — it is a slight to the stranger as well as to the introducer, which no subsequent atten- tions will cancel : you are not obliged to invite him, as that i.' a matter of choice. In France, and indeed generally on the continent, it is the established usage that strangers on arriving pay the first visit to residents. In England, with much better taste, the contrary i? the rule. A stranger should never be made to feel that he is demanding attentions—but if possessed of true delicacy he would prefer waiting until they are offered. In spite of our own folly in occasionally copying them, the French (with a mud greater affectation of politeness) are infinitely inferior to Englisl gentlemen in true good breeding. Remember, also, that a letter should never remain unanswered a moment longer than is absolutely unavoidable. Should you not have time to answer it fully, a simple acknowledgment is better than no notice of it at all. An adherence to these rules will prevent your exposure to any coldness or slight you might otherwise incur. Do not imagine these little ceremonies to be insignificant and beneath your attention ; they are the customs of society; and if you do not conform to them, you will gain the unen- viable distinction of being pointed out as an ignorant, ill-bred person. Not that you may care the more for strangers by showing them civility, but you should scrupulously avoid the imputation of being deficient in good breeding; and if you do not choose to be polite for their sakes, you ought to be so for your own. •MARRIAGE. 73 CHAPTER III. MARRIAGE. When a man marries, it is understood that all former ac- quaintanceship ends, unless he intimate a desire td renew it, by sending you his own and his wife’s card, if near, or by letter, if distant. If this be neglected, be sure no further intercourse is desired. In the first place—A bachelor is seldom very particular in the choice of his companions. So long as he is amused, he will associate freely enough with those whose morals and habits would point them out as highly dangerous persons to introduce into the sanctity of domestic life. Secondly—A married man has the tastes of another to con- sult ; and the friend of the husband may not be equally accept- able to the wife. Besides — Newly-married people may wish to limit the circle of their friends, from praiseworthy motives of economy. When a man first u sets up” in the world, the burden of an extensive and indiscriminate acquaintance may be felt in various ways. Many have had cause to regret the weakness of mind which allowed them to plunge into a vortex of gayety and expense they could ill afford, from which they have found it difficult to extricate themselves, and the effects of which have proved i serious evil to them in after-life.CHAPTER IV. DINNERS. Of the etiquette of a dinner party, it is extremely difficult to say anything, because fashions are continually changing, even at the best tables; and what is considered the height of good taste one year, is declared vulgar the next; besides which, cer- tain houses and sets have certain customs, peculiar to their own clique, and all who do not conform exactly to their methods are looked upon as vulgar persons, ignorant of good-breeding. This is a mistake commonly fallen into by the little “ great * in the country, where the circle constituting “ society” is neces- sarily so small, that its members can not fail to acquire the same habits, feelings, and observances. However, a few hints mav not be thrown away, always recollecting that people can only become ridiculous by attempting to be too fine. I am, of course, supposing my readers to be acquainted with the dtcen cies of life. When the members of the party have all assembled in the drawing-room, the master or mistress of the house will point • To avoid misconstruction, it will be as well to define what is meant by the term “ little great,” beginning by showing what is not. It is not that numerous class (however respectable), professional and mercantile, found in and about every country town; those merely great little, who, without any other qualifies- tion than the possession of a few thousand pounds, constitute themselves the aris- tocracy of the place: but a very different body — namely, the old, solid," county people,” the descendants of patrician families, the Squirearchy, with incomes of fVom seven to ten thousands a year, and the customary representatives in parlia- ment (until lately) of their town or county — persons who are of great local influence and importance, on account of their descent and wealth, but who, not- withstanding, become insignificant and merely units in the mass, amidst the brilliant statesmen, the talent, the splendor of rank and fashion, which adorn and elevate the metropolis.out which lady you are to "ake into the dining-room, according to some real or fancied standard of precedence, rank (if there be rank), age, or general importance; that is, the married before the single, &c.; or they will show their tact, by making com- panions, those who are most likely to be agreeable to each other. Give the lady the wall coming down stairs, take her into the room, and seat yourself by her side. If you pass to dine merely from one room to another, offer your left arm to the lady. * Remember that it is the lady who at all times takes prece- dence, not the gentleman. A.person led a princess out of the room before her husband (who was doing the same to a lady of lower rank); in his over-politeness, he said, “ Pardonnez que nous vous precedons,” quite forgetting that it was the princess and not he who led the way. Well-bred people arrive as nearly at the appointed dinner hour as they can. It is a very vulgar assumption of importance purposely to arrive half an hour behind time; besides the folly of allowing eight or ten hungry people such attempting oppor- tunity of discussing your foibles. The lady of the house will of course take the head of the table, and the gentleman of the highest rank will sit at her right hand; the gentleman next in rank will be placed on the left of the hostess, so that she may be supported by the two persons of the most consideration (who will assist her to carve). In many houses of distinction, the master and mistress sit vis-a-vis to each other at the middle of the table. In nearly all the houses of the nobility, at present, the o{>- eration 0/ carving is performed at the side table, where the piece de resistance, by which is meant the roast joint, is placed. It is the custom at present for the lady of the house to follow her guests into the dining-room, except when a prince of the • Of those passages marked with an asterisk, the ground-work has been taken from the MS. note-book of a lady of rankroyal family is present, who leads out the lady of the house first. The gentleman of the house lakes the bottom of the table, and on each side of him must be placed the two ladies highest in rank. You will find a party of ten convenient, as it admits of an equal distribution of the sexes : neither two men nor two women like to sit together. It is a matter of regret that table napkins are not considered indispensable in England; for, with all our boasted refinement, they are far from being general. The comfort of napkins at dinner is too obvious to require comment, while the expense can hardly be urged as an objection. If there be not any nap- kins, a man has no alternative but to use the table-cloth, unless (as many do) he prefer his pocket handkerchief—a usage suf- ficiently disagreeable. It is considered vulgar to take fish or soup twice. The rea- son for not being helped twice to fish or soup at a large dinnei party is — because by doing so you keep three parts of the company staring^ at you while waiting for the second course, which is spoiling, much to the annoyance of the mistress of the house. The selfish greediness, therefore, of so doing consti- tutes its vulgarity. At a family dinner it is of less importance, and is consequently often done. Do not ask any lady to take wine, until you see that she has finished her fish or soup. This exceedingly absurd and trou- blesome custom is very properly giving way at the best tables to the more reasonable one of the gentleman helping the lady to wine next to whom he may be seated, or a servant will hand it round. But if either a lady or a gentleman be invited to take wine at table, they must never refuse; it is veiy gauche so to do. They need not drink half a glass with each person, but merely taste of it. Asking ladies to take wine is now quite exploded. It is merely offered by the gentlemen who sit next to them; but if you are' in a country house where the custom is retained, itwould be better breeding to follow the fashion of tne place, rather than, by an omission of what your entertainer considers civility, to prove him, in the face of his guests, to be either ig.- norant or vulgar. It is considered well bred to take the same wine as that se- lected by the person with whom you drink, the choice being left to the person highest in rank, or most advanced in age When, however, the wine.chosen by him is unpalatable to you it is allowable to take that which you prefer, prefacing it with “ Will you permit me to drink claret, sherry,” &c. At everv respectable table you will find silver torks; being broader, they are in all re&pects more convenient than steel for fish or vegetables. Steel forks, except for carving, are now never.placed on the table. At family dinners, where the common household bread is used, it should never be cut less than an inch and a half thick.. There is nothing more plebeian than thin bread at dinner. Never use your knife to convey your food to your mouth, under any circumstances; it is unnecessary, and glaringly vul- gar. Feed yourself with a. fork or spoon, nothing else — a Knife is only to be used for cutting. If at dinner you are requested to help any one to sauce, do not pour it over the meat or vegetables, but on one side. If you should have to carve and help a joint, do not load a per- son’s plate — it is vulgar: also in serving soup, one ladleful to aach plate is sufficient. Fish should always be helped with a silver fish-slice, and your own portion oi it divided by the lork aided by a piece of bread. The application of a knife to fish is likely to destroy the del- icacy of its flavor; besides which, fish sauces are often acidu- lated ; acids corrode steel, and draw from it a disagreeable taste. In the North, where lemon or vinegar is very generallj used for salmon and many other kinds of fish, the objection be comes more apparent.Eat peas with a dessert spoon ; and curry also. Tarts and puddings are to be eaten with a spoon.* As a general rule — in helping any one at table, never use a knife where you can use a spoon. Making a noise in chewing, or breathing hard in eating, art both unseemly habits, and ought to be eschewed. Many people make a disgusting noise with their lips by in- haling their breath strongly while taking soup — a habit which should be carefully avoided. # You can not use your knife, or fork, or teeth too quietly. Do not press people to eat more than they appear to like, nor insist upon their tasting of any particular dish : you may so far recommend one, as to mention that it is considered “ excellent.” Remember that tastes differ, and viands which please you, may be objects of dislike to others ; and that in consequence of your urgency, very young or very modest people may feel themselves compelled to partake of what may be most disagreeable to them. # Do not pick your teeth much at table, as, however satisfac- tory a practice to yourself, to witness it is not at all pleasant. Ladies should never dine with their gloves on — unless their nands are not fit to be seen. Servants occasionally wait at table in clean white gloves there are few things more disagreeable than the thumb of a clumsy waiter in your plate. The custom, however of servants waiting at table in gloves has never been adopted in the mansions of people of distinc- tion. A white damask napkin, in which his thumb is enveloped, is given to each servant, and this effectually precludes its con- tact with your plate. Glass wine-coolers, half filled with water, should be placed next each person at table. * By a step in pseudo refinement, the etiquette of 1839 pronounces that th« use of a spoon for these pur]>oses must be carefully avoided at dinner, it being °n'v admissible for sou|*s and ices.Finger glasses, filled with warm water come on with the jcssert. Wet a corner of your napkin, and wipe your mouth, then rinse your fingers; but do not practise the filthy custom of gargling your mouth at table, albeit the usage prevails among a few, who think that because it is a foreign habit it can not be distrusting. The custom of drinking toasts, and of forcing people to drink bumper after bumper of wine until drunkenness results, is quite oanished from gentlemanly society to its proper place — the tavern. It arises from a mistaken idea of making visiters welcome : the amohitryon of the feast overlooking the fact of its being much more hospitable to allow his guests to do as they please, and to take only as much wine as they may feel convenient or agreeable. It is but a miserable boast, that a man has suf- cient strength of stomach to sit his companions “ under the tabie.” * Never pare an apple or a pear for a lady unless she desire you. and then be careful to use your fork to hold it: you may sometimes offer to divide a very large pear with or for a person. At some of the best houses, coffee is brought into the dining- room before the gentlemen quit the table — a very good custom, as it gently prevents excess, the guests retiring to the ladies immediately afterward ; it also allows those who have other engagements to take coffee before they quit the house. Coffee should be brought in at an hour previously appointed, without the bell being rung for it, but a sufficient interval must be allowed, lest the host seem chary of his wine. For instance, nine o’clock is a good hour, if the dinner were at six; or ten o’clock for one which commenced at seven. At present, coffee is not brought into the dining-room in fashionable houses, except when a small party, intending to go to a theatre, are pressed for time— it is always served in the draw ug-room. Nevertheless, the former is a very excellent arrangement in country houses, for very obvious reasons. Coffee, on the continent, and sometimes in this country igfollowed by liqueurs of two or three kinds, which are left to the • choice of the guests, and are poured into very small glasses — an unnecessary custom, not to be advocated in respectable, but only in “ high” society. Do not suppose that it will exalt you in the opinion of others by speaking harshly and imperatively to servants, or add at all to your consequence. Never order other people’s servants about. At a strange table, say “ if you please,” and “ thank youit may be said in a manner that will not encourage familiarity. Should your servants break anything while you are at table, never turn round, or inquire into the particulars, however annoyed you may feel. If your servants betray stupidity or awkwardness in waiting on your guests, avoid reprimanding them publicly, as it only draws attention to their errors, and adds to their embarrassment. Nothing indicates a well-bred man more than a proper mode of eating his dinner. A man may pass muster by dressing well, and may sustain himself tolerably in conversation ; but if he be not perfectly “ au fait,” dinner will betray him. It is a piece of superlative folly for men who dine at a house to take their round hats into the drawing-room: it answers no ourpose at all; and the necessity of giving them to a servant on entering the dinner room creates confusion. Men of fashion, nevertheless, invariably take their hats into the drawing-room, where they are left when people go to dinner, and whence they are removed by the servants, and placed in the ante-room, of vestibule. Invitations to dine should be answered to the lady. Invita- tions to a ball should be in the lady’s name, and the answer, of course, ^ent to her. It is customary, when you have been out dining, to leave a card upon the lady the next day, or as soon after as may be convenient. Attentions of this sort are not to be expected from profes-sional men, as doctors* lawyers* &c.* thexr time being too valu- able to sacrifice in making visits of mere ceremony; therefore, do not attribute such omission to any want of respect, but to its proper cause — time more usefully occupied. When a man is about to be married, he usually gives a din- ner to his bachelor friends; which is understood to be their cong£, unless he choose to renew their acquaintance.CHAPTER V. SMOKING. If you are so unfortunate as to have contracted the low habit of smoking, be careful to practise it under certain restric- tions; at least so long as you are desirous of being considered fit for civilized society. The first mark of a gentleman is a sensitive regard for the feelings of others; therefore, smoke where it is least likely to prove offensive by making your clothes smell ; then wash you» mouth and brush your teeth. What man of delicacy could presume to address a lady with his breath smelling of onions ? Yet tobacco is equally odious. The tobacco smoker, in public, is the most selfish animal imaginable; he perseveres in con- taminating the pure and fragrant air, careless whom he annoys, and is but the fitting inmate of a tavern Smoking in the streets, or in a theatre, is only practised by shop-boys, pseudo-fashionables — and the “swell mob.” All songs that you may see written in praise of smoking in magazines or newspapers, or hear sung upon the stage, are ■puffs, paid for by the proprietors of cigar divans and tobacco shops, to make their trade popular; therefore, never believe nor be deluded bv them. Never be seen in cigar divans or billiard rooms ; they are fre- quented, at best, by an equivocal set. Nothing good can be gained there; and a man loses his respectability by being seei entering or coming out of such places.CHAPTER VI. SNUFF. As snuff-taking is merely an idle, dirty habit, practised by stupid people in the unavailing endeavor to clear their stolid intellect, and is not a custom particularly offensive to their neighbors, it may be left to each individual taste as to whether it be continued or not. An “ elegant” can not take much snuff without decidedly “ losing caste.” “ Doctor,” said an old gentleman, who was an inveterate snuff-taker, to a physician, “is it true that snuff destroys the olfactory nerves, clogs, and otherwise injures the brain “ It can not be true,” was the caustic reply, “ since those t*ho have any brains never take snuff at all.”CHAPTER VII. FASHION. But few things betray greater imbecility of mind than a ser- vile imitation of the extravagancies of any fashionable monster. A man possessed of the delicate and proper feelings of a gen- tleman would deem himself degraded by copying another, even to the curling of a whisker, or the tie of a cravat; as, by so doing, he could only show the world of how little importance he felt himself, and the very poor opinion he entertained of his own taste. Fashion and gentility are very distinct things—for which reason, people, really of the highest rank, are too proud to be- come martyrs to any prevailing mode; and the man of true taste will limit his compliance with the caprices of fashion to not appearing equally conspicuous for its utter neglect.CHAPTER VIII DRESS. It is bad taste to dress in the extreme of fashion; and, in general, those only do so who have no other claim to distinc- tion— leave it, in these times, to shopmen and pickpockets. There are certain occasions, however, when you may dress as gayly as you please, observing the maxim of the ancient poet, to be “ great on great occasions.” Men often think when they wear a fashionably cut coat, an embroidered waistcoat, with a profusion of chains and other trinkets, that they are well dressed, entirely overlooking the less obtrusive, but more cer- tain, marks of a refined taste. The grand points are—well- made shoes, clean gloves, a white pocket handkerchief, and, above all, an easy and graceful deportment. Do not affect singularity in dress, by wearing out-of-the-way hats, or gaudy waistcoats, &c., and so become contemptibly con- spicuous j nothing is more easy than to attract attention in such a manner, since it requires neither sense nor taste. A shrewd old gentleman said of one of these “ninnies,” that “he would vather he taken J'ot a fool, than not be noticed at all.” A dress perfectly suited to a tall good-looking man, may render one who is neither ridiculous; as although the former may wear a remarkable waistcoat or singular coat, almost with impunity, the latter, by adopting a similar costume, exposes himself to the laughter of all who see him. An unassuming simplicity in dress should always be preferred, as it prepossesses every one in favor of the wearer. Never affect the “ ruffianly” style of dress, unless, as some excuse, vou hold a brillian position in society. A noblemaior an exceedingly elegant and refined man, is sometimes foolish enough to disguise himself, and assume the “ ruffian, ” as it amuses him to mark the surprise of people at the contrast be- tween his ajqwarance and his manners ; but if you have no such pretensions, let your costume be as unostentatious as possible, lest people only remark that “ your dress is as coarse as your mind.” Always wear your gloves in church or in a theatre. Avoid wearing jewellery, unless it be in very good taste, and then only at proper seasons. This is the age of mosaic gold and other trash ; and by dint of swindling, any one may become “ flashy” at a small expense. Recollect that every shop-boy can coarsely imitate your “outward and visible sign” if he choose to save his'money for that purpose. If you will stand out in “high and bold relief,” endeavor to become eminent for some virtue or talent, that people may say, “ There goes the celebrated (not the notorious) Mr. So-and-so.” It is a delicate subject to hint at the incongruities of a lady’s dress yet, alas! it forces itself upon our notice when we see a female attired with elaborate gorgeousness, picking her steps along the sloppy streets, after a week’s snow and a three days’ thaw, walking in a dress only fit for a carriage. When country people visit London, and see a lady enveloped in ermine and velvets, reclining in a carriage, they are apt to imagine, it is the fashionable dress, and adopt it accordingly, overlooking the coronet emblazoned on the pannels, and that its occupant is a dutchess or a marchioness at the least, and that were the same person to walk, she would be in a very different costume, and then only attended by a footman. Ladies of good taste seldom wear jewellery in the morning and when they do, confine themselves to trinkets of gold, or those in which opaque stones only are introduced. Ornaments with brilliant stones are unsuited for a morning costume.CHAPTER IX. OF MUSIC IN GENERAL SOCIETY. It is the misfortune of musical people generally to be such *1 husiasts, that, once beginning, they seldom know when to fei.ve off: there are few things a greater scccatura than a long ‘ Concerto,” or duett upon the pianoforte, or an “ Air with (endless) variations.” The listeners get fidgetty and tired, al- though they are usually too polite to say so. I once sat nexX to a foreigner, who had endured with exemplary patience a te- dious “ Concerto,” and who, when it was finished, applauded veheipently, then, turning round to me with a droll expressic of countenance, said, “ Perche sc Jinisce.” * Nothing, however, is more rude than to converse while peo- ple are singing. If you do not like music sufficiently to listen to it, you should remember that others may do so, and tint not only do you interrupt their enjoyment of it, but you offei an offence to the singers. A song now and then is very desirable, as it is a relief to conversation, but half a dozen consecutively, even from St. Ce- cilia in person, would become a bore,; besides which, people are now accustomed to hear popular songs executed by those whose profession it is, with a superiority rarely attainable in private life, so that amateurs seldom do more than provoke un- fortunate comparisons. However, when highly-gifted musicians are found in private society, we have generally observed their delicacy to be in proportion to their excellence. But the case is much worse when a professional “ violinist” * “ Because it ’a finished.”is admitted into a private party: he either flourishes away, un- conscious that he is not in an orchestra, or else, desirous to prove his superiority over the “ dilettantihe overpowers them with a tone which might fill a cathedral. The best fiddles scream too much in (comparatively) small rooms, however delicately they may be played; besides that few even of the first English musicians seem to understand what an “ accompaniment” really means, each performer being too intent on making his particular instrument heard above the rest, to care about the subject, or to feel that an “ accompaniment” should be subdued, and subser- nent to the voice. We once heard the silver tones of an exquisite singer com- pletely overpowered, between the shriekings of a fiddle, the vain-glorious grumblings of a violoncello, and the wheezinga of a dyspeptic flute.CHAPTER X. DANCING. With the etiquette of a ball-room, so far as it goes, there are but few people unacquainted. Certain persons are appointed to act as stewards, or there will be a “ master of the ceremo- nies,” whose office it is to see that everything be conducted ii_ a proper manner: if you are entirely a stranger, it is to them u must apply for a partner, and point out (quietly) any young lady with whom you should like to dance, when, if there be no obvious inequality of rank, they will present you for that pur- pose ; should there be an objection, they will probably select some one they consider more suitable; but do not, on any ac- count, go to a strange lady by yourself, and request her to iance, as she will unhesitatingly “ decline the honor,” and think you an impertinent fellow for your presumption. Any presentation to a lady in a public ball-room, for the mere purpose of dancing, does not entitle you to claim her acquaintance afterward ; therefore, should you meet her the next day, do not attempt to address her. At most, you maj lift your hat; but even that is better avoided—unless, indeed, she first bow — as neither she nor her friends can know who or what you are. In France, Italy, Germany, and Russia, gentlemen invariably take off their hat to every lady in whose society they had ever previously been, even though no introduction had taken place; but they do not consider themselves authorized to address a lady in conversation to whom they have not been presented. This is surely the usage most consistent with true politenesi towar womenDo not wear black or colored gloves, lest your partner look Bulky; even should you be in mourning, wear white gloves, not black. People in deep mourning have no business in a b room at all. Lead the lady through the quadrille; do not drag her, nor clasp her hand as if it were made of wood, lest she not unjustly think you a boor. You will not, if you are wise, stand up in a quadrille without knowing something of the figure ; and if you are master of a few of the steps, so much the better. But dance quietly; do not kick and caper about, nor sway your body to and fro : dance only from the hips downward ; and lead the lady as lightly as you would tread a measure with a spirit of gossamer. Do not pride yourself on doing “steps neatly,” unless you are ambitious of being taken for a dancing-master; between whose motions and those of a gentleman there is a great difference. If a lady should civilly decline to dance with you, making an excuse, and you chance to see her dancing afterward, do not take any notice of it, nor be offended with her. It might not be that she despised you, but that she preferred another. We can not always fathom the hidden springs which influence a woman’s actions, and there are many bursting hearts within white satin dresses ; therefore do not insist upon the fulfilment of established regulations “ de rigueur.” Besides, it is a hard case that women should be compelled to dance with everybody offered them, at the alternative of not being allowed to enjoy themselves at all. If a friend be engaged when you request her to dance, and she promises to be your partner for the next or any of the fol- lowing dances, do not neglect her when the time comes, but be in readiness to fulfil your office as her cavalier, or she may think that you have studiously slighted her, besides preventing her obliging some one else. Even inattention and forgetfulness, by showing how little you care for a lady, form in themselves a tacit insult.If a lady waltz with you, beware not to press her waist; you must only lightly touch it with the open palm of your hand, test you leave a disagreeable impression not only on her ceinturc, but on her mind Above all, do not be prone o quarrel in a ball-room ; it dis turbs the harmony of the company, and should be avoided if possible. Recollect that a thousand little derelictions from strict propriety may occur through the ignorance or stupidity of the aggressor, and not from any intention to annoy : remember, also, that really well-bred women will not thank you for making them conspicuous by over-officiousness in their defence, unless, indeed, there be any serious or glaring violation of decorum. In small matters, ladies are both able and willing to take care of themselves, and would prefer being allowed to overwhelm the unlucky offender in their own way. If, while walking up and down a public promenade, you should meet friends or acquaintances whom you do not intend to join, it is only necessaiy to salute them the first time of pass- ing ; to bow or to nod to them every round would be tiresome, and therefore improper ; do not be alraid that they will think you odd or unfriendly, as, if they have any sense at all, thev will appreciate your reasons. If you have anything to say to them, join 'hem at once.CHAPTER XI. CONVERSATION. Many men of talent forget that the object of conversation is to entertain and amuse, and that society, to be agreeable, must never be made the arena of dispute. Some persons spoil every party they join by making it their only object to prove that every one present is in the wrong but themselves. It requires so much tact and good breeding to sustain an ar gument, however logical and correct the arguer may be, that an avoidance of it will gain him more popularity than a triumph over his adversary could accomplish. Even slight inaccuracy in statement of facts or opini^-- should rarely be remarked on in conversation. A man should never permit himself to lose his temper in society — not show that he has taken offence at any supposed slight—it places him in a disadvantageous position — betraying an absence of self-respect, or at the least of self-possession. If a “ puppy” adopt a disagreeable tone of voice, or offen- sive manner toward you, never resent it at the time—and above all, do not adopt the same style in your conversation with him; appear not to notice it, and generally it will be*discontinued, as it will’be seen that it lias failed in its object: besides which— you save your temper. * Be careful in company how you defend your friends, unless the conversation be addressed to yourself. Remember that nobody is perfect, and people may sometimes speak the truth; «nd that, if contradicted, they may be desirous of justifying themselves, and will prove what migh\ otherwise have been a matter of doubt.Wit elicits wit; and when such brilliant materials meet, thev form the flint and steel of conversation : appreciation is the tinder, which, though not bright in itself, receives and cherishes the scintillations as they fall. Who has not felt his intellect expand with the assurance of having what he says understood? Appreciation certainly is a talent. Never “ talk at people” — it is in the worst possible taste, as it is taking an unfair advantage of them: if there be anything you dislike, “ out with it boldly,” and give them an opportunity of explaining, or of defendiug themselves; or else be silent. * Do not say a person is “ affable” unless he or she be of very high rank, as it implies condescension. Royal personages are “ gracious.” * Do not repeat the name of the person to whom you are speaking—as, “Indeed, Mr. Stubbs, you don’t say so, sir:” or, “ Really, Mrs. Fidkins, I quite agree with you, Mrs. Fid- kins.” It is a sufficiently bad habit in an equal, but in one of lower rank it becomes an impertinence. In talking of your own children, never speak of them as “ Master William,” or “Miss Jane “Mr. Henry,” or “Mm Louisait is a miserable attempt to elevate both them and yourself, which will assuredly fail, as it is practised by those only who have recently risen above that dingy mass of medioc- rity the “multitude;” leave it, therefore, to others to pay them so proper a mark of respect, secure that none but veru intimate friends will take the liberty of calling them plair “ Mary” or “ Edward:” this is an important caution, as it is generally the first error committed by the “ nouveaux riches.” Above all things, do not mistake stiffness for dignity; the very spirit of good breeding consists in being easy and natural yourself—and in the endeavor to make others the same. Eti- quette is only the armor of society; and when your position is fairly established, it may be thrown aside, at least so far as b consistent with good feeling and decorum. Avoid a loud tone of voice in conversation, or a “horselaugh:” both are exceedingly vulgar; and if practised, stran- gers ir.ay think that you have been “cad” to an omnibus. * There is a slightly subdued patrician tone of voice, which we fear can only be acquired in good society. Be cautious also bow you take the lead in conversation, unless it be forced upon you, lest people reiterate the remark made on a certain occasion upon that “ Brummagem” Johnson, Dr. Parr—that “ he was like a great toe in society ; the most ignoble part of the body, yet ever thrust foremost.” Be very careful how you “ show off” in strange company, unless you be thoroughly conversant with your subject, as you are never sure of the person next to whom you may be seated. It is a common occurrence for young gentlemen of very shallow pretensions indeed, to endeavor to astonish country society, never dreaming that experienced London men may be present, when an exposure most probably follows as a penalty for their presumption. For instance — never talk largely of the “ Opera” — “Pasta, Grisi, Lablache,” &c., on the strength of having been there once or twice only, lest you unwittingly address some old frequenter of the theatre, who has for the last twenty years been accustomed to hear all the “ primi cantanti, serii e buffi," and who will, most likely, have every opera, its “ casts,” and music, at his tongue’s end: neither talk learnedly of pic- tures— “bits,” “effects,” or of “masters,”—“Titian,” “Ru- bens,” &c., from the very slight information to be obtained from copies or engravings, for fear some sly old fellow, who is con- versant with all the “ collections” from “ Dan to Beersheba,” should be malicious enough to analyze your knowledge; in- deed, as the consciousness of ignorance is apt to make people peculiarly sensitive, it would be as well to avoid all subjects with which you know the generality of persons present can nrn be acquainted; for, as the mere introduction of such topics will be considered and resented as an assumption on your part, should you happen to be vanquished on your own ground, your defeat will be relished proportionably. Remember, that if youire quiet in society, you will, at least, have credit for discretion, and be more likely to escape annoyance ; it is display alone that courts publicity and provokes criticism. It would astonish and frighten the mock brilliants we so often meet,'could they but know how quickly and infallibly the practised eye will detect their position in the world, in spite of the gaudy lacker spread c/er (in the hope of concealing) a homely material; in such cases, gorgeous vestments act but as conductors to the coarse shirt, and clumsy ill-made boots — such as a gentleman could not u'ear; the vulgar pronunciation of one word—or an awk- ward undrilled walk, is sufficient to render more than doubtful the legitimacy of the most captivating exterior. It is a matter of observation, that there are so few people who know how to walk properly, and who do not “ get along” with a lounging 11 slewing” gait; also the pseudo “ militaires,” who appear never to have known, that to carry themselves erect — to step well—and to turn out their toes — are among the earliest and most indispensable preparations for a military life. There can not be a custom more vulgar or offensive than that of taking a person aside to whisper in a room with com- pany, yet this rudeness is of frequent occurrence — and that with persons who ought to know better. Lounging on sofas, or reclining in chairs when in society, as if in the privacy of one’s own dressing room or study, is always considered indecorous; but in the presence of ladies is deemea extremely vulgar.* There are but few things that display worse taste than the introduction of professional topics in general conversation, es- pecially if there be ladies present: the minds of those men must be miserably ill-stored, who can not find other subjects for conversation than their own professions. Who has not felt this on having been compelled to listen to “ clerical slang,” musty college jokes, and anecdotes divested of all interest beyond the atmosphere of a university; or “ law” jokes, with “ good btories” of “learned counsel;” “long yarns;” or the equallytiresome muster-roll of “our regiment” colonels dead, maimed majors retired on pensions, subs lost or “ exchanged, gravitating between Boulogne and the King’s Bench I All such exclusive topics are signs either of a limited intellect, or the most lament- able ignorance. Making the “ sports of the field,” or anecdotes of the clubs, the topics of conversation in female society, will subject a man to the imputation of having a very mauvais ton; indeed, people should be careful not to introduce topics that have only a local interest, and not to speak slightingly of those who are the friends of any of the guests. Mothers should be on their guard not to repeat nursery anec- dotes or bon-mots, as, however interesting to themselves, they are seldom so to others. Long stories should always be avoid- ed, as, however well told, they interrupt general conversation, and leave the impression that the narrator thought the circle dull, and consequently endeavored to amuse it. An exceedingly vulgar custom prevails in the northern part England — that of women using the titles of their husbands marks of distinction to themselves; being spoken of, or written to, and even having printed on their cards, “ Mrs. Capt. Gubbins,” “ Mrs. Dr. Borax,” or the more balmy and eupho- nious appellation of “ Mrs. Col. Figgins” (generally the flaxen- haired owner of a bilious Colonel, from “ Choultry Plains,” and late of Cheltenham). It springs from a desire to show the world how much they are exalted by their husbands’ rank above the “Muggs” and “Jenkinses” of low life. How oddly “Mrs. Alderman Tibbs,” or “ Mrs. Churchwarden Hobbs,” would sound! To such an extent is this desire for title carried, that at Aberdeen a row of dram-shops near the Pier is placarded as being kept by “ Mrs. Captain Gordon,” “ Mrs. Captain M‘Dou- gal,” &c., being the consorts of the “ masters” of the trading smacks. The proper mode of distinguishing the wives of va- rious members of the same family is by using the Christian name; as Mrs. Edward, Mrs. James, &c., as the case may be.Never use the term “genteel.” Do not speak of “genteel people;” it is a low estimate of good breeding, used only by vulgar persons, and from their lips implies that union of finery, flippancy, and affectation, often found in those but one remove from “ hewers of wood and drawers of water.” Substitute “well-bred person” “manners of a gentlewoman,” or of “a gentleman,” instead. Never use the initial of a person’s name to designate him • as “ Mr. P.,” “ Mrs. C.,” “ Miss W.,” &c. Nothing is more abominable than. to hear a woman speak of her husband as “ Mr. B.” In speaking to ladies of title, do not say “ my lady,” it being only proper for servants and tradespeople so to do; you may occasionally say “your ladyship,” as it shows that you are aware of their claim to the distinction. The fear of being thought vulgar often drives meritorious people, who have risen by their own exertions, into the opposite extreme, and causes them to be superlatively delicate. Such persons are shocked at the sound of “ breeches,” will substitute “inebriated” for “very drunk,” and can not be brought to al- low there are such animals as “ women” in the world. It is also a clumsy attempt* at refinement to use a particular »e£of words: at present we have “splendid travelling,” “splen- did gin,” “splendid potatoes,” &c.CHAPTER XII. ADVICE TO TRADESPEOPLE. By tradespeople I do not mean merchants or manufacturers but shopkeepers and retailers of various goods, who will do well to remember that people are respectable in their own sphere only, and that when they attempt to step out of it they cease to he so. When exceptions are made by the world, it is generally in favor of brilliant genius or extraordinary acquirements,-and wen theii it can only be by the prevailing suffrage of society; therefore, do not attempt to claim the acquaintance of those above you, lest you meet a mortifying repulse.* Many will say, “ We are just as good as they are, and as respectable.” So you are, but yet not fit companions for each otheK Society is divided into various orders, each class having its own views, its peculiar education, habits, and tastes; so that the conversa- tion Cif the one would probablv be most uninteresting to the other It is the fashion to talk of the spread of education — and, so far as merely reading a^d writing go, it is true; but they are only the Jirst steps to a cultivated mind, and the literary acquirements of a man of business are necessarily confined to reading the newspaper. He has no time for anything else, and, however skilful in his trade, can not form an idea of that man's mind, who has devoted all his energies to science or literature. Nay, can you suppose that even the merchant of Portland place and the occupant of the back parlor to a butcher’s shop think and feel alike ? Cerainly not; and recollect, also, tint how- ever highly you may estimate yourself the world will judge you by any standard rather than your own. The English are the most aristocratic democrats in the world , always endeavoring to squeeze through the portals of rank and fashion, and then slamming the door in the face of any u'dbr* tuuate devil who may happen to be behind them.CHAPTER XIII. VISITING. If you are thrown among fashionable people, you must not pay a visit to a lady before three o’clock, P. M., nor after five ; as, if you call before that time, you will interrupt those avociw tions which more or less occupy every lady in the early part of the day ; if later than five o’clock, you will prevent her driving out. On returning visits, a card left at the house is generally con- sidered all that is necessary; but if you are admitted, do not make a morning visit too long, lest you interfere with the engagements of the mistress of the house. # Never leave your hat in the hall when you pay a morning visit; it makes you look too much at home; take it with you Into the room.CHAPTER XIV. VISITING CARDS. ' When a family arrive in London, they should send out cards to their acquaintances to inform them of that event, as well as of their address. The names of the daughters who have been presented are to be inscribed on the cards of their mothers. One card is sufficient for a mother and daughters to leave, and should there be daughters or sisters residing with the lady called on, the corner or corners of the card may be turned down, to signify that the visit is'meant for them also. When a married lady makes a call, she may leave her bus band’s card. It is not unusual for persons to send cards by their servailts to return visits; hut this mode is considered disrespectful, ex- cepting when it is to return thanks for “ inquiries.” On the Continent, persons inscribe on their cards “en per- sonnel to show that they themselves have come, and not sent their cards. Many of the English, regardless of the motive, notwithstanding its being so evident, had the same words writ- ten on theirs, and the persons to whom these cards were sent not unfrequently had cards with “ en personne” thrust into the hands of their porter by a laqiuiii de place, when they were in the vestibule, or entering their carriages, which excited much laughter, the servants also joining in the mirth. When a wedding takes place in a family, the cards of the newly married pair are sent round to all their acquaintances to apprize them of the event. The cards are sent out by the bridegroom to his acquaintances, and by the parents of thenride to theirs. In some instances the cards have been united by silken or silver cords, but this mode has not been adopted by people of fashion. To those who leave cards at the residence of the bride and bridegroom during their absence in the “ honey moon,” cards are sent to inform them ol* their return. When cards are left for married people who resicle with their parents or relatives, their names should be written on the cards left for them to preclude mistakes. When persons without parents are married, they should send their cards to their acquaintances. Foreign ladies always inscribe their maiden names, as well as their married ones, on their cards—as, “La Comtesse de M nee de S ” ; this explains to what family they be- long, and prevents mistakes where there are others of the same name. An English lady observing this mode, and wishing to adopt it, left her cards with the following inscription, “ Mrs. Popkins nee Tibbetts,” to the no small amusement of the quizzer with whom they were left. In giving dinners, endeavor to engage persons only who are known to each other, or who mutually desire to become ac- quainted. Exceptions may be made in favor of persons of acknowledged merit, or of high distinction. In society, verbal invitations are often given to balls or con- certs, by persons with whom you are only slightly acquainted, and have not previously visited: in such a case, it is proper to leave a card beforehand on the lady at whose house the soiree is to take place, that she may be made acquainted with your name and intention—so that you may be expected; because you may have received an invitation from her husband of which she was ignorant, and he may not be there to present you. Should it so occur, a card previously left will prevent either p*rty looking foolish, or the stranger appearing “ de trop.” Some doubts having arisen, after a death, as to the proper period of returning cards of “ thanks” for visits of condolence,we believe there is no fixed time; for, as cards of thanks imply that the bereaved parties are prepared to receive visiters, ii must be, with them, entirely a matter of feeling. In France, deaths, births, and marriages, are announced by unsealed letters sent round by the heyls of the family in which the event has occurred. These are called ulettre$ de Jam party Those addressed to relatives are written by the chy de famillt. and those to friends and acquaintances are printedCHAPTER XV. CARDS. Caud-tables are generally set out in a room appropriate! t<> their use, or else in the room of reception, where they are placed apart. When coffee has been served, the master or mistress of the house proposes cards to the visiters, and those disposed to play advance to the table, at which a fresh paok of cards is opened, and spread, and each person intending to play draws a card. The persons who draw the highest card are ex- cluded from the rubber; but the four individuals who have drawn the lowest, again draw cards for partners ; the two highest become partners ; and the two who have drawft the lowest have *he choice of seats and the deal. At the commencement of every fresh rubber the players again cut for partners. For the regulation of the games, our readers are referred to Major A*****’s “Hints on Whist.” Wagers are made in preference with the persons playing; but h they decline to accept them, a player is justified in betting With any of the spectators. In good society it is considered mauvais ton to be too punc- dious and exacting with regard to the penalties incurred through nistakes, which, in general, are only enforced at the Clubs, 'here “play” is looked on as an affair on the stock exchange; ’ aere each individual profits by the indiscretion of his oppo- nent. To lose without any exhibition of ill-humor, and to wi* without any symptom of exultation, are deemed characteristic of high breeding and savoir vivre, and those who can not always remember this, would do well to give up play. Women should never play except for trifling suras, and noteven then, unless they can retain the command of their temper; she who wishes to win a heart, or to retain one, should never Dermit her admirers to behold her at cards, as the anxiety they oroduce is as destructive to beauty as to sentiment.CHAPTER XVI. TATTLING. It has somewhere been observed that, “ In good society, a tacit understanding exists that whatsoever conversation may take place shall be to a certain degree sacred, and may not honorably be carried out of it, and repeated to the prejudice of the utterer.” This axiom can not be too strongly inculcated; as, if such practices were allowed, all confidence would be de- stroyed, and there would be no end to the mischief caused by silly or malignant people. Conversations ever have taken place, and ever tot//, in which °pinions are given, and motives scrutinized, truly and justly too, and with decided advantage to the world, as it is very often the only way in which one half of mankind can be put upon their guard against the other; nevertheless, but few people would be pleased to learn that their designs, their foibles, or their weak- uesses, had been made the subject of discussion, as most men flatter themselves the world will take them at whatever value t!»ey may choose to set upon themselves. There are none, therefore, so despicable, as those traitors to society who hurry from house to house, laden with the remarks made by one party u]>on another; stirring up discord and strengthening hatred wheresoever they appear—by whom every u/iguarded expres- sion is distorted or magnified, and who take a malicious pleas- ure (too often under the guise of affection) in wounding one friend at the expense of another. This is the bane of country society, and falls particularly heavy on those “ accustomed to -i the freedom of thought and frankness of expression of agreat capital, and who find it difficult, if not impossible, to adopt the caution so necessary in a small community.”* Consequently, give your own opinion of people if you choose, but you are not at liberty to repeat that of others. Only fancy the result of one lady saying to another, “Well, Maria, what do you think Miss Macaw says of you ? She says, that you have the thickest ankles, and the thinnest arms, of any girl in the county ; with a contour like an alligator, and a head like a bison ! ! /” Be cautious how you indulge in badinage in the presence of dull, common-place people; they will either get out of temper in consequence of taking what you say literally, or else will stare and wonder at you for being such a “ strange man.” “ Poor Susan!” said a gentleman to a pretty girl. “ Poor, indeed !” replied the lady, with an indignant toss of the head; “ not so poor as that comes to. Papa can give us something.” What an anticipation for the sensitive aspirant1 * Life of Maeki&tonh.OF GENERAL SOCIETY. 107 CHAPTER XVII. OF GENERAL SOCIETY. If vou meet a lady of your acquaintance in the street, it if her yart to notice you Jirst, unless, indeed, you are very inti- mate. The reason is, if you bow to a lady first, she may not chooie to acknowledge you, and there is 110 remedy; but if she Dow to you—you, as a gentleman, can not cut her. On the Continent, the fashion in this instance as in many others, is exactly the reverse. No lady, however intimate you may be with her, will acknowledge your acquaintance in the street, unless you are the first to horfor her with a bow of rec- ognition. It must be obvious, however, to all thinking persons. • that our own custom is the most in accordance with good tast* Never nod to a lady in the street, neither be satisfied with touching your hat, but take if off—it is a courtesy her sex de mands. , Never keep your hat on when handing a lady to her box 01 to her carriage. Never slam the door of a box with violence, nor speak loudly enough to disturb an audience. W hen you visit a lady in het box at the opera, be sure to leave it when other visiters enter, lest you be de troy. Never sit in the boxes of a theatre with your hat on; it is an insult to the rest of the audience, especially if there be ladies. • Do not insist upon pulling off your glove on a very hot day when ywu shake hands with a lady. If it be off, why, all very well; but it is better to fun the risk of being considered un- gallant, than to present a clammy ungloved hand.Never, indeed, offer your hand, unless well assured that it in in a presentable state of frigidity; for the touch of a tepid hand chills the warmest feelings. On entering a coffee-house, and sitting down, take off your hut; it is only a proper mark of respect to your own class, toward whom you should jtay the same deference you exact from others. If you meet a friend in the street — in a coffee-house, shop, or indeed any public place, never address him by name; at least not so loudly as that others may hear it: sensitive people do not like to be “ shown up” to strangers as “ Mr. Jones,” or “ Mr. Smith,” and so attract disagreeable notice. Accost your friend quietly; and do not roar out, “ Ah ! Mr. Smith ! how do you do, Mr. Smith ?” it is very offensive, and shows a great want of proper delicacy. Do not strain after great people, — for, although they like the homage, inasmuch as it flatters their vanity, yet they despise the dispenser of it. Pay them, however, all proper respect; but do not forget what is due to yourself. As a general rule—it is the place of a superior in rank to speak first to the inferior. When presented to a person of higl; rank, you should leave a card at his house the next day. If you *have been in society with a nobleman, and shoula chance to meet him again elsewhere, leave it to him to speak first, or to recognise you. II you claim his acquaintance, you give him an opportunity of behaving superciliously to you, which would be as well avoided. An unfortunate Clerk of the Treasury, who, because he was in the receipt of a good salary, besides being a “ triton among the minnows’ of Clapham Common, fancied himself u great man, dined at the B—f S—k Club, where he sat next to a noble Duke, who, desirous of putting him at ease with himself, con- versed freely with him, yet probably forgot even the existence *ff such a person half an hour afterward. Meeting his Grace inOF GENERAL SOCIETY. 109 the street some days after, and encouraged by his previous con- descension, the hero of the quill, bent on claiming his acquaint- ance, accosted him in a familiar “ hail-fellow-well-metish” man- ner,— “Ah, my Lord, how d’ye do?” The Duke looked surprised. “ May 1 know, Sir, to whom I have the honor of speaking?” said his Grace, drawing up. “Oh! why—don’t you know? We^dined together at the B—f S—k Club, the other evening! — I’m Mr. Timms of the Ireasury! !” “Then,” said the Duke, turning on his heel, “Mr. Timms of the Treasury, I wish you a good morning.” Remember that all your guests are equal for the time being, and have a similar claim to your courtesies; nay, it there be a difference shown, those ot the lesser rank require a little more attention than the rest, that they may not be made to feel their inferiority. There is no more common or absurd mistake than supposing that, because people are of high rank, they can not be vulgar; — or that, if people be in an obscure station, they can not be well bred. We have seen as many instances of vulgarity in a peer as could be found in a grazier; and have noticed as many ex- amples of a perfect freedom from the least taint of it in persons in humble life, as could be desired in a dutchess. Nothing more clearly indicates the true gentleman than a desire evinced to oblige or accommodate, whenever it is possible or reasonable; it forms the broad distinction between the well- bred man of the world, and the coarse and brutal crowd—the irreclaimably vulgar,—vulgar, not from their inferiority ol station, but because they are coarse and brutal. Nevertheless, we often find persons so selfish and supercilious, and ol so equivocal an importance, that they fancy any compliance with the wishes of the many, would tend to lessen their dignity in the eyes of their companions, and who foolishly imagine that a good coat places them above the necessity of conciliating the feelings of the mul- titude by the performance of an act of courtesy. It is evident there can not be a greater mistake, since even the lower classes(whatever their own practices may be) keenly appreciate, and gratefully acknowledge, the slightest consideration shown to them by their superiors. That persons should be found weak enough to believe themselves above control, is lamentable, as such sil- liness can only expose them to the ridicule of their equals, and the contempt of their superiors. A perfect freedom from affectation, and an observance of the feelings of others, will always exempt a person from the charge .of vulgarity. Be careful to offer a favor in such a manner as not to offend the delicacy of those whom you wish to serve. Favors may be so conferred as to become insults. If kindness and a desire to oblige induce you to offer an “ attention,” do not press it after it has once been refused, and so affront ill-tempered or testy people. A friend who had been djning a short distance from London, when about to return, said to one of the party, “Sir, tny carriage is at the door; if agreeable, I shall be happy, tc take you to town.” — “I am much obliged to you,” replied the ungracious Mr. Tubbs, drawing himself up, “ but — / }iavt a carriage of my own." When you offer a place in your carriage, be sure to give the best, or you will subject yourself to the charge of ignorance and ill-breeding. A spirituelle reproof for an error of this kind was lately given at Paris by the celebrated Mons. de M. Having met in the vestibule of the Opera two parvenu bankers of the tribe of Israel, much more remarkable for their wealth than their good manners ; the Jews, observing that the compte’s carriage had not arrived, offered him a place in theirs, which he accept- ed. To his surprise, “ Les freres ff*roces” (as they are named) entered the coach first, and seated themselves in the back seat, leaving the aged bon-vivant to sit with his back to the horses; but no sooner did he observe this piece of ill-breeding, than he pulled the check-string and insisted on leaving the carriage.— “ But why will you get out V asked the parvenus, in astonish- ment. “ Because,” replied Mons. de M., “ I always feel illwhen I sit with my back to the horses — in the carrxave of % nothcr."1 • Do not cross a room in an anxious manner, and force your way up to a lady merely to receive a bow, as by so doing you attract the eyes of the company toward her. If you are desirous of being noticed by any one in particular, put yourself in their way as if by accident, and do not let them see that you have sought them out; unless, indeed, there be something very im- portant to communicate. • Do not take upon yourself to do the honors in another man’s house, or constitute yourself master of the ceremonies, as you will thereby offend the host and hostess. There is a shallow attempt at “ fallen greatness,” sometimes practised by persons who wish it to be supposed they are below their proper sphere, — that of bestowing high-sounding titles upon verv ordinary objects; as calling a hackney-coach “ the carriagecr speaking of a gig, or wretched pony chaise, as “ our carnageor of a miserable passage, three feet wide, as the “ hall.” This is very foolish, and does not impose upon any one. In addressing letters to persons of rank, the title should be written, whether of Duke, Marquis, Earl, Viscount, or Baron, >tead of “ Lord” So-and-so, which is considered disrespectful • tnd vulgar. This rule should be particularly attended to in writing to Ladies, in order to avoid confounding the rank they hold with the very inferior one of the wives of Baronets or Knights. Military rank always takes precedence of titles on the superscription of letters. As the term “ Esquire,” has long degenerated into a title of mere courtesy, give it when writing to any person above the rank of a shopkeeper, and scrupulously award it to all professional men; not to do so, would appear like an ungracious attempt, on your part, to depreciate them, and to display your own impor- tance by affecting to under-rate their pretdnsions ; besides, as the first lesson taught to “people of condition” is “to be courteous 8to all men,” and as you will rarely find these little proprieties overlooked by them, any neglect on ypur part will naturally suggest the inference, that the offending epistle was indited by some very auumihg or very ignorant person. It is needless in these times to consider the distinctions made by the “ Law” in ages past; for as “ belted knights” exist no longer, the reality of an Esquire has long merged in the shadowy title, which “ as by law allowed,” is shared by the lowest pettifogger, or the coarsest tradesman admitted into the ranks of the “ Gentlemen pensioners.”* We do not attempt to deny that “Esquire,” in common with the terms “ Professor, or 1 rofessional,” is oc- casionally abu«ed, since a “ Professorship rewards alike the saltatory labors of a dancing-master, and gilds the graceful avocations ol an “Arcadian” hair-dresser. % In writing to subalterns in the army, be careful not to address your letter to Ensign or Lieut. So-and-so, but to J. I. Esq., 83d Reg*., &c., as the case may be ; Captain being the lowest grade which a military man chooses to acknowledge. Do not offer a person the chair from which you have just risen, unless there be no other in the room. Never take the chair usually occupied by the mistress of the house, even though she be absent, nor use the snuff-box of an- other, unless he offer it. Do not touch any of the articles ol bijouterie in the houses where you visit: they are meant only for the use of the ladv of the house, and may be admired, but not touched. Do not beat the “ devil’s tattoo,” by drumming with your fingers on a table; it can not fail to annoy every one within • Gentlemen pensioners are Esquires by “ authority.’* This ancient and pleasant provision for decayed gentlemen was much distorted during the last reign, by the admission of improper persons; so conspicuous, indeed, did its iqualidness and vulgarity become, sa to attract the attention, and excite the ire, of the late sovereign, who threatened to disband such an equivocal appendage to his state. The institution has now, however, become regenerate, by restricting the quality of its members; and at present shines forth in more than its pristine splendor, as the “ Honorable Band of Gentlemen-at- A rmi**- -so be it.OF GEN'ERAL SOCIETY. 113 hearing, and is the index of a vacant mind. Neither read the newspaper in an audible whisper, as it disturbs the attention of those near you. Both these bad habits are particularly offen give where most common; that is, in a country news-room Remember, that a carelessness as to what may incommode others is the sure sign of a coarse and ordinary mind; indeed the essential part of good breeding is more in the avoidance of whatever may be disagreeable to others, than even an accurate observance of the customs of good society. Never allow any person above the rank of a shopman to leave the /oomjwithout your ringing the bell for the street door to be opened. Thousands have been irremediably Offended by having been suffered to quit a room unattended, and to “ le’ themselves out.” This deserves particular notice, as it is a very common omission with persons, who, having amassed a little wealth and set up for “somebodies,” would be exceedingly an- noyed to have it whispered that they could be guilty of such gross ill breeding. People who have risen in the world are .loo apt to suppose .hey render themselves of coffsequence in proportion to the pride they display, and their want of attention toward those vith whom they come in contact.* This is a terrible mistake, as every ill-bred act recoils with triple violence against its per- petrators, by leading the offended parties to analyze them, and- to question their right of assuming a superiority to which (in the absence of positive rank) they are but rarely entitled. People who may be what, in French phraseology, are termed jmrvcnus, or novvcuux riches, and who desire to attain a good position in society, must be careful to avoid making any ad- vances to people of rank, and should wait until these last seek their acquaintance. A contrary line of conduct will only draw on them the imputation of forwardness and vulgarity. For as h is the privilege of the person of the highest rank to make the first advances toward acquaintanceship, there is no excuse for the inferior to commit himself. Do not abuse the advantage of a “two-penny post,'* bymaking people pa) the postage of letters on your own busi ness merely, and transmitted through such a channel entirely for your convenience, by saving the trouble of sending a servant. The postage upon one solitary note is small, it is true; but may amount to a large sum in the aggregate. Depend upon it, the most “ tiffy” people will not be very much offended at the postage being paid, although some affect openly to despise an expense at which they grumble in secret. There is no better test of a man’s claim to be considered “ a gentleman” than a scrutiny of his conduct in money trans- actions. A man may possess rank and fashion^and, by an as- sumed frankness of character, deceive the multitude; but the moment his purse is invaded, if he be not ol the true caste, he will display the most contemptible meanness, he will take ad- vantage of the liberal — evade, by every miserable subterfuge, the claims of those he dares not oppress, and unblushingly dejj' those unfortunate persons whose poverty is likely to prevent the due assertion of their rights. Such a man may possess statio in society—he may be an “elegant”—he may be a prince but, if he be not honest—he is not a gentleman. With intimate friends, you may dispense with ceremony as much as may be deemed desirable to all parties; but with strangers, or persons with whom you are only imperfectly ac- quainted, every deviation from established custom is a slight, as it tends to show how little their society is appreciated; and will (if they possess a grain of spirit) be resented accordingly. Although these remarks will not be sufficient in themselves to make you a gentleman, yet they will enable you to avoid any glaring impropriety, and do much to render you easy and con- fident in society. Gentility is neither in birth, manner, nor fashion—but in the mind A high sense of honor—a determination never to take a mean advantage of another—an adherence to truth, delicacy, and politeness, toward those with whom you may have dealings —are the essential and distinguishing characteristics of a gen- tleman.THE RHENISH OR SPANISH WALTZ. * AND THE THE GERMAN WALTZ A DEUX TEMPS. Ti e pretending, or attempting in public what we can not perform nas nc more unfortunate feature about it, quam q\iod ridiculos homi- nes fat "i. t One can scarcely conceive of the agonies which I have suffered in obsc ing my countrymen making themselves ridiculous by their attempt., and failures in the art of Waltzing. But it is quite im- possible to imagine the martyrdom which I have endured in observing my countrywomen making themselves ridiculous in the same way For the!; sake, then, I subject my self to the reproach— ** Turpe est difficiles habere nugas, • Et stultus labor est ineptiarum and am t >ntented to discuss the true principles of waltzing, since, on the true principle, the more practice, the more perfect; but on falso principle-., the moro practice, the less perfect. Let u: begin by examining the English system. The waltz step being completed in six beats of the music, should be counted 2, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, not 1, 2, 3, 1, 2, 3. The gentleman is told to begin by a twirl on ho left foot to the 1, 2, 3, of the music, and to take three steps to the 4, 5, 6. The lady is told to take three steps to the 1, 2, 3, of the t.iusic, and to twirl on the left fo^t to the 4, 5, 0. Between he two, this makes a twirl ad infinitum. At the I, 2, 3, the lady runs round the gentleman while he twirls; and at the 4, 5, G, the gentleman runs round the lady whue she twirls. But nothing is more to be dei;^red in waltzing than getting over the ground ; and nothing more to Ic avoided i.. it than this tee-tot::ming on the same ground There chould be no tw rl in the case. Bui in the English, that is he Rhei.isu or Spanis.i waltz, t.ie whole cffair should consist, when perfect, of three steps forward, in a circular direction, and, by turo- .ng, of th'ee steps backward, in the same circular direction. The oest way U> make this clear, the best way to ensure the getting off the «ame ground, and the beet and easiest way to legin the art, is to (115)wrdtz in a square instead of a circular direction. Place two chairs 11 ■ tli) middle of the room, and practice the step according to the follow- ing plan, clearing a side of the chair at each 3 and 6 of the music, that is, in half a c jmplete waltz step; so that the square of each chair is accomplished in two complete waltz steps. gentleman's step in the figure of eight, in the RHENISH WALTZ. instead of 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, to the time of the music, count “back three steps “front three steps.” O.i the w^rds “back three steps,’ take three steps backward, beginning with the left f >ot, and turn tc the right at the 3 of the music. On the'w^rds “front three steps.’ lake three step: to the front, beginning with the right foot, and turn to the right at the 6 ( f the music. The stsp In the reverse waltz is the same, except that the turns are to the left, instead of to the right The lady’s step is the same as the gentleman’s, except that she be- gins by advancing with the right foot, and therefore counts “ from three rrteps,” “ back three steps,” and the plan for her step is the same as the plan for the gentleman’s, when the words back and front are exchanged one for the other. The figure is delineated on squares to lIiow the principle ; and it should be so practised a*, first. But when perfect, a circle should be described round eac-h cfcvr, changing from one mode of waltzing to the other, after | assinj between tht chairs. Ti e numoe s desijnate the time of the mu ic, and th" .ourae taker in the figure. gentleman's step. gentler;ax’s step. LADY 8 8T ;P. Count “ back three steps,” “ front three steps.” Count “ front three steps three steps.” ” “ bacl- steps 3. 2 i tree. 1 bar'- C .eps. steps 3. 2 three. 1 front. 6 steps. front 4. thxce 5. Common waltzing, circling : t the lelt and turr ng to Oms l.fili’. 5 three. 4 fYont. bac’:4. | threeS. ! Common waltzing, j circling to tha left > and turning to the ( right. j 5 three. 4 back. steps 6. 1 lack. 2tare:. 3 step*. . ‘.eps 6. j. 1 front. 2 three. 3 steps. three 5. linnt 4. Reverne waltzing, circling to the right - nd turning to the left. 4 front. 5 three. three, .j back 4. | Roverae w Itzing, j circling to > e right > and turnin' to the J left. 4 Lactt. 5 three steps J. 2 tore-*. 1 back. ' stips. steps 3. 2 three, t front. 6 stepsIt will be perceived that after the 3, the common waltz is taken bv urning to the right; the reverse waltz by turning to the left. Ol the change may be made after the 6, by beginning the step at one of the sides of the squares, instead of at the top or bottom, as marked in the plan. In fact, in all waltzing, a turn is made at each 3 and 6. To turn to the right inclines you to circle to the left, which is common waltzing ; to turn to the left inclines you to circle to the right, which is reverse waltzing. To turn to the right or left is one as easy as the other. The common waltz, or the reverse waltz, is one as easy as the other. And to continue one mode of waltzing, or to change to the other, is one as easy as the other. This is the best mode for beginners to learn the step of the Rhen- ish waltz. It is the best possible practice for waltzing, because it i> the best possible practice for getting over the ground; since, if the pupil twirls and dwells on the same ground, he will not clear the side of the chair. This way of doing the figqre of 8 is very easy, and very beautiful. The old mode of doing it, turning to the right, ever, while circling to the right, tends to encourage spinning on the saim ground. It must always be an exertion, and is, in general, a most ungraceful, not to say disgraceful exhibition. SERPENTINE WALTZING. 3. 2. 1. 6. 6. 1. 2. 3. 4. I 5* 5. | 4 1, Common 4. Reverse 5. Waltzing. 1 4‘ 4. Waltzing. 5 6. 1. . 2. 3. 3. 2. 1. 6. 5. 1 4. 4. 5. 2. Reverse ■ 5_ Common 4. Waltzing. j 5. 5. Waltzing. 4. 3. 2. 1. 6. 6. 1. 2. 3. 4. | 5. 4. 3. Common 5. | 6. Reverse Waltzing. 1 Waltzing. 5 4- 4- i 3 0 1. 2. 3. 3. 2. 1. «.The change from one mode of waltzing to the other, alternately om •tep of common waltzing, and one step of reverse waltzing, may bi practised according to the preceding plan, in the serpentine form round any number of chairs. Serpentine, lines as well as the figur of 8 are delineated in squares, in order to make the principle appa rent; and they should be so practised at first. But when perfect they should be performed on circular lines, making the change fron one mode of waltzing to the other after passing between the chairs. It is easy to go straight forward or backward, for any distanc., without circling or turning. Also good waltzers should be able to keep straight lines while waltzing, either in the common or in the reverse way ; that is, turning continuously either to the right or to the left: or changing from one to the other. The step should be a sort of glide; something between a slide and a step. The fore part of the fool should never quite leave the ground; the heel should never be raised more than sufficient to pass a sheet of paper under it. In the gentleman’s step, in the common waltz, particularly in keeping straight lines, the left foot ht 3 is turned very much in, that is, to the right, to enable you to turn to the right; and' the right foot at 6 is turned very much out, that is, also to the right, for the same purpose. In the reverse waltz, the left foot at 3 is turned very much out, that is, to the left, to enable you to turn to the left; and the right foot at 6 is turned very much in; that is, also to the left, for the same purpose. The same principle reigns in the lady’s step, but the right foot marks the 3, and the left foot the 6. The feet at these numbers are both turned to the right in the common waltz to enable you to turn to the right, and circle to the left; and they are both turned to the left in the reverse waltz to enable you to turn UMhe left and circle to the right, if these things are found difficult to apprehend in the abstract, practice soon gives a muscular facility in them. In fact, the waltz step must be intrusted to the most mysterious and least forgetful of our memories—the memory of the muscles; which “ at the fingers’ ends,” will how often thrid its way through the notes of an air, the succession of which our mind has forgotten. But teachers should know the theory of what they have to teach, though, with their pupils they have, in general, to trust to practice only ; that is, to muscular, not mental apprehension, and to muscular, not mental memory. And they must be satisfied if they can dun into the heels what the head is unwillirg or unable to apprehendh * a common error with the gentleman to have his left shouldei *»th. r Trom his partner’s right shoulder than his right shoulder is trom her left. He should be exactly opposite his partner; and the shoulders of both should describe parallel lines. It is the common error with the lady to hang her whole weight on the gentleman’s arm. Ladies should practise the step by themselves, and with one another. On the principle which has been laid down, it is perfectly easy for two persons to waltz, and even to do the figure of 8, without holding one another at all. No one should pretend to waltz who can not do this. \ ou should be able to do the step perfectly by yourself, before you begin with another person. 1 or all waltzing, one of the best practices is, both alone and with a partner, to waltz the largest possible square which can be execute^ in two complete waltz steps. Place four chairs together, touching "»te another, and waltz the square of them in two complete waltz steps; that is, clearing one side of the square at each 3 and 6 of the music. This should be practised in the common waltz, and in the reverse waltz, and changing from one mode of waltzing to the other, so as to retrograde over the same ground, without stopping, or making any cessation in the step. When this is accomplished with ease, draw tin chairs apart from each other by degrees, so as to enlarge the square waltzed on. I his practice proves and improves the quantity of space covered in the step, the directness of the step, and the equality of the step; that is, it necessitates one half of the step, measured by time, being also equal in the space covered to the other half step. Without this test, it is a common error in the Rhenish waltz, to cover more space with the front half step, than with the back half step, or vice versa; and in tho German waltz u deux temps, to cover more space with the right half step, than with the left half step, or vice versa. Of course, directly in proportion to the velocity, and to the slipper- iness of the floor, is the facility of keeping straight lines, and the difficulty ol keeping circles or squares. So much for the English, or French, or Spanish waltz or as the Germans call it, the Rhenish waltz, “ Der Rheiner Waltzer ” The German waltz, a deux temps, is exactly contrary in its principle to the Rhenish waltz. The motion, instead of being always backward or forward, is always directly sideways. The beats of the feet, instead of be;ng in three time, are in two time. The step, or these beats ofof the feet, may be said to begin with the contrary foot to that or vhich they begin in the Rhenish waltz, and the turn is at a different time of the music. I shall give two modes of doing the German step. There are many. No. 1.—Gentleman’s step in the figure of 8, a deux temps. Count “ turn, left, slide,” “ turn, right, slide.” On the word “ turn,” turn to the right on the right foot, making a beat with it; that is, while standing on the right foot, make a slight rise, and again fall on it. At the same time, move the left foot to the left, and bring it to the ground. On the word “ left,” pass the weight over the left foot without any beat. On the word “ slide,” make a slide to the left, with both feet as much as possible at once. On the word “ turn,” turn to the right on the left foot, making a rise and a beat with it, at the same tirn*s moving the right foot to the right, and bringing it to the ground. On the word “ right,” pass the weight over the right foot, without any beat. On the word “ slide,” make a slide to the right with both feet as much as possible at once. The step in the reverse waltz is the same, except that the turns are to the left instead of to the right. The lady’s step is the same as the gentleman’s, except that she begins with the contrary foot, and therefore counts “ turn, right slide,” “ turn, left, slide.” And the plan is the same for her step as for the gentleman’s, when the words right and left are exchanged one for the other. The numbers designate the time of the music, and the course taken in the figure. No. 1.—QKNTLKMAN’s 8TF.P. Count “ turn, left, slide,” “ turn, right, slide.” turn 4. 3 slide. 2 left. 1 turn. No. 1.—lady’s step. Count “ turn, right, slide,” “ turn, left, slide.” turn 4. 3 slide. 2 right. 1 turn. right 5. slide 6. Common waltzing, circling to the left and turning to the right. 6 slide. 5 right. 4 turn. 5 right. 6 slide. 1 turn. left 5. i Common waltzing, j 6 slide, j circling to the left J i*j r turn,nK *°‘h« c i.r, slide 6. ! right. < 5 lelt turn I. 2 left. 3 slide* turn 1. 2 right. 3 slide. 4 turn slide 6. nght5. Reverao waltzing, circling to the right and turning to the left. slide 6. j Reverie waltzing, j 5 left. | circling to the right j 1 and turning to the s’ , . left 5. j ten- | 6 »hde. urn 4. 3 slide. 2 left. turn 4 3 slide. 2 right. 1 turn.This step is really a deux temps as well as & deux pas. Since in the first half of the step there is no beat at the 2 of the music, but only at the 1, and the 3. And in the second half there is no beat \t the 5, but only at the 4, and the 6. There is another common way of waltzing & deux temps, as fullows: No. 2.—gentleman’s step in the figure of 8, a. deux temps. Count “ left, slide, turn,” *• right, side, turn.” On the word “ left,” take a step to the left with the left foot. On the word “ slide,” a slide to the left with both feet as much as possible at once. On the word *• turn,” turn to the right on the left foot without moving it. On the word “ right,” take a step to the right with the right foot. On the word “ slide,” a slide to the right with both feet, as much as possible at once. On the word “ turn,” turn to the right on the right foot with- out moving it. The step in the reverse waltz is the same, exccp* that the turns are to the left instead of to the right. The lady’s step is the same as the gentleman’s, except that she begins with the right foot, and therefore counts “ right, slide, turn,” ‘ left, slide, turn,” and the plan is the same for her step as for the gentleman’s, when the words right and left are exchanged one for the other. The numbers designate the time of the music, and the course taken m the figure, d d * No. 2 —oentlkman’8 step. No. 2.—lady’s step. Count “ left, slide, turn,” “ right, slide, turn.” Count “ right, slide, turn,” “ left, slide, turn.” turn 3. 2 slide. 1 left. 6 turn. turn 3. 2 slide. 1 right. 6 turn. right 4. Common waltzing, circling to the left 5 slide. left 4. Common waltzing, circling to the left 5 slide. slide 5. and turning to the right. 4 right. slide 5. and turning to the right. 4 left. turn 6. I left. 2 slide. 3 turn. turn 6. 1 right. 2 slide. 3 turn. slide 5. Reverse waltzing, circling to the right and turning to the 4 right. slide 5. Reverse waltzing, circling to the right and turning to the 4 left. ngut4. left. 5 slide. left 4. left. 5 slide. turn 3. 2 slide. 1 left. 6 turn. turn 3 2 slide. 1 right. 6 turn.This step, like No. 1., is really & deux temps, as well as 4 deux pas since the first half of it is completed at the 2 of the music, and the second half at the 5 ; while at the 3 and 6 of the music, no step or beat of the foot is made, but merely a turn. Both these steps are used for the galop. But in the galop the halt at each turn is of the same duration as the side step ; that is there are two beats of the music for the side step, and two beats of the music for the turn ; and if no turn is made, but straight lint# continued without turning, as there is no halt, double the number of side steps are made in the same time as would be when turning. In the waltz, the halt at each turn is only of half the duration of the side step; that is, there are two beats of the music for the side step, but only one beat for the turn: for this reason, in the waltz you can not go on straight lines sidewise without turning, as you can in the galop, since the alternate steps which should be equal in space, would be unequal in time. The first half of No. 2, with a halted turn on the right foot, in- stead of the second half, is taught and used for the German waltz for the gentleman. The lady doing the complete step. A pretty step may be practised a deux pas, but not 4 deux temps, according to the following plan. GENTLEMAN’S 8TEP IN THE FIGURE OP 8, A DEUX PA8, BUT NOT A DEUX TEMPS. Count “left three steps,” “right three steps.” On the words “ left three steps,” take three steps to the left, beginning with the left foot, and turn to the right. On the words “ right three steps,” take three steps to the right, beginning with the right foot, and turn to the right. The step in the reverse waltz is the same, except that the turns are to the left, instead of to the right. The lady’s step is the same as the gentleman’s, except that she begins with the right foot, and therefore counts “ right three steps,” “ left three stepsand the plan for her step is the same as for the gentleman’s, when the words right and left are exchangod one for the other. The rumbers designate the time of the music, and the course takeu in the figure.Ie the gentleman’s step at the 1, 2, 3 of the music, the left foot marks the 1, and the left shoulder le&ds three steps to the left. At the 4, 5, 6 of the music, the right foot marks the 4, and the right shoulder leads three steps to the right. But at the 2 and the 5 the heels come together; so that as the foot which comes to the ground at the 2 and 5, only takes the same step which the preceding foot has just taken, though three beats are made, the space of only two steps is passed over, where three actual steps are made in the Rhenish waltz. This step, therefore, may be considered a deux pas though not a deux temps. As in the Rhenish waltz, these steps should be first learned and practised on squares, along the sides of two chairs, in the form of the figure of 8. Serpentine lines may be practised for alternating the common and reverse waltz, as explained for the Rhenish waltz; also straight lines, making continuous turns to the right, or continuous turns to the left, or changing from one to the other. Both the Rhenish and German waltzes are easily learned, so that either may be taken, at the option of your partner; and if perfectly performed, each is a most exquisitely graceful dante. But let no one couple attempt both steps at once. For any one who can only dance the German step, which is in two time, to attempt it with one who can only dance the Rhenish step, which is in three time, is somewhat to surpass the quidlibet au« dendi. Mingle, mingle, spirits that may, and tigers and lambs, and all the rest of Horace’s unminglcables may be brought together. But GENTLEMAN S STEP. LADv’s 8TEP. Count “ left three steps,’ three steps.” “ right, Count “ right three steps/’ “ leP three steps.” steps 3. 2 three. ] left. 6 steps. steps 3. 2 three. 1 right. 6 steps. right 4. three 5. i Common waltzing, ! circling to the left and turning to the right. 5 three. 4 right. left 4. three 5. Common waltzing, circling to the left and turning to the right. 5 three. 4 left. steps 6. 1 left. 2 three. 3 steps. steps 6. 1 right. 2 three. 3 steps. three 5. right 4. Reverse waltzing, circling to the right and turning to the left. 4 right. 5 three. three 5, left 4. Reverse waltzing, ; circling to the right ; and turning to the 1 left. j 4 left. 5 three. steps 3. 2 three. 1 left. 6 steps. steps 3. 2 three. 1 right. 6 steps.the two steps must remain incapable of amalgamation till two is mad* equal to three. Indeed, a person must be able to conform to any step, or to fore* his partner to conform to his own step, or he must know who doe* which step, before he ventures to ask them to dance. Even the two modes which I have given of performing the Ger- man waltz a deux temps, are wholly incapable ol working together. For though these two steps are apparently very similar, they differ essentially. For instance, No. 1 makes a beat with the feet, and passes them sidewise at the 3 and 6 of the music. No. 2 makes no beat of the feet, but halts and turns at the 3 and 6. No. 2 makes a heat with the feet, and passes them sidewise, at the 2 and 5 of the music; No. 1 makes no beat, and the feet are stationary at the 2 and 5. No. 1 turns at the 1 and 4 of the music; No. 2 turns at the 3 and 6 of the music. In No. 1 you may be said to push yourself side- wise with the rear or non-leading foot, at the 1 and 4 of the music In No. 2, to draw yourself sidewise with the advanced or leading foot, at the 2 and 5 of the music. Thus if any one couple were to attempt these two steps together, the feet of one would he in motion and beating time, while those of the other were stationary and not beating time; and one would be turning while the other would be going sidewise. On the comparative merits of the Rhenish and German waltzes, 1 should decide thus. The German waltz is much the best for per- sons of ordinary qualities, since it is infinitely the most easy to ap prehend mentally, and infinitely the most easy to execute corporeal ly ; and, in general, that is the best, which is the best executed ; but for persons of extraordinary qualities, the Rhenish waltz is incompar- ably superior. This is certain, that if the three steps forward and backward are really executed, half as much ground again is passed over in the Rhenish waltz, as is passed over in the German waltz, since in the Rhenish waltz three steps are taken where two only are taken in the German waltz. But in consequence of the difficulty of this, rot one person will be found to perform the Rhenish waltz in perfection, where thousands will perform the German waltz in per- fection. Indeed, I have never yet seen any two persons together who did the reai three steps forward and backward of the Rhenish waltz »n the perfection of which it is capable. And as the quicker the ■itne, the moie diiiiculty in covering space; so the quicker the tmieihe more difficult the Rhenish waltz as compared with the German waltz, since in the Rhenish waltz one third more space is covered in the same time than is covered in the German waltz. The German *valtz is, indeed, the quickest in general, because the weak, the heavy and the slow can do it more quickly than they can the Rhenish waltz Also those who are so weak, heavy, or slow, as to be unable to keep up to the time of modern waltzing in any step, find a greater facility in lieeping behind the time in the German waltz than they do in the Rhenish waltz That is, tnis verv common out-of-time shirking is less perceptible in the German wauz man it is in the Rhenish waltz. In fact, a very great proportion of those who waltz a deux temps, or in two tune, waltz in no time, or in false time; that is, they waltz to their own time, instead of to the time of the music. I he way to de- tect, and to correct this very common error, is to observe in the gen- tleman’s step, that the left foot always leads at the 1, and the right foot at the 4 of tjie music. And in the lady’s step, that the right foot always leads at the 1, and the left foot at the 4 of the music. This should be invariable. Let the young and active perform Ae Rhenish waltz, and subside into the German waltz when their pow ers or those of their partners are not equal to the tyhenish waltz. But let all waltzers learn both waltzes. The great thing is practice, both alone and with a partner. The oeginner is too apt to think the affair finished when he has learned the step. But practice is not more necessary in skating than it is m waltzing. By long and patient practice by himself, the pupil will, as in ska- ting, imperceptibly attain a gradual, but great improvement in power, rapidity, length and directness of step, smoothness, and endurance both muscular and vascular (wind), it is, indeed, witn waltzing as with every other accomplishment, mental or corporeal, “ wha does the utmost that he can, shall whiles do mair.” There are three modes of shirking in waltzing. We may keep the time, and neglect to cover space, or we may cover space, and yeglec* to keep the time ; or (what is most common, particularly a deux temps), we may neglect both time and space, and complacently pud- dle round small circles, behind time. But in first-rate waiting, pace is a sine qua non. And in pace, space as well as time is a sine qua non ; that is, for pace the step must not only be rapid in point of lime, but must cover space.In first-rate waltzing, as the sportsman says, we must “ go the pace and keep it.” But “ it is the pace that kills.” Practice only, on the true principle, will enable us even to go the pace; and practice only will enable us to keep it; that is, practice only will onve us the pace of activity, which enables us to take so many steps of such a length, in such a time, and which depends on the muscular system. And practice only will give us the pace of endurance, which enables us to continue the exertion, and depends chiefly on the vascular system — 011 the power and action of the heart and lungs (wind). First-rate waltzing is as great an exertion as racing; that is, it is the greatest exertion possible. Many ladies fall victims to it from want of condition ; that is, from not being prepared for it by othei exercise, or from not b^ing gradually inured to it by practising the thing itself. But “ graciles non sunt sine viribus artus.” And, with practice (which is training), how often is the lady found to be the superior, both in speed and endurance. Supposing gradual training, waltzing, like any other exercise, is a great promoter of health and strength; but to perrons out of condi- tion, that is, out of work, waltzing, like any other strong exercise, is destruction. It is destruction io race a horse which is out of work. 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Trial., - 1 50 Cora Belmont; or the Sincere Lover, - I 30 The Woman In Black, 1 30 The Devoted Bride, 1 30 Love and Duty, - 1 SO Courtship A Matrimony 1 50 Bohemians In London, 130 High Life Waehlngton, 1 30 or In cloth at £2.00 each. DOESTICKS’ WORKS. Pht'tVr n*’ * 1 so I The Elephant Club. - 1 50 a'^1* *1*1'’ - 1 So| Witches of New York. I 50 Aoove are iD p>pei. COT#r> or ju clo,h „t novels on the war. ; ISO (Days of Shoddy, -130 Above are in paper cover, or in cloth at £2.00 each. BEST COOK BOOKS PUBLISHED. Petereon.' New Cook Book, Mrs. Ooodfellow’s Cookery as it Should Be Mis. Leslie’s New Cookery Book, . Widdlfleld’e New Cook Book, - Air*. Hale’s Receipts for the Million, Miss Leslie'. New Receipts for Cooking, - . ^ Mr*. Hale's New Cook Book, - Franeatelll's Celebrated Cook Book. The Modern Cook, with 62 illustrations, 600 large octavo pages, S 00 S 00 S 00 1 00 2 00 2 (10 I 00 5 00 CHARLES DICKENS’ WORKS. 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Rosa Lambert, - . 1 00 1 00 Mary Price, - - 1 00 I 30 Eustace Quentin, - 1 00 Joseph Wllmot, - - I 00 1 00 Banker's Daughter, - I 00 1 00 Kenneth, - . . 1 00 1 00 The Rye-Hon.e Plot, 1 «0 1 00 The Necromancer, • 1 00 Mysteries of th. Court of London, - Hose Foster, Carolina of Bruns- wick, ... Venetia Trelawn.y, . Lord Saxondaie, Count Chri.toval, Above are In paper cover, or In doth, at £2.00 each. The Opera Dancer, - The Ruined Gamester, Child of Waterloo, Ciprina, or Secrets of a Picture Gallery, - Robert Bruce, - Discarded Queen, The Glpsey Chief, - Mary Stuart, Queen of Scots, ... Wallace, Hero Scotland, 73 Isabella Vincent, - 73 Vivian Bertram, . 73 Countess of LaKdles, 75 73 Duke of Marchmont, The Soldier’s Wife, - May Middleton,- Massacre of Glencoe, Queen Joanna, or the Court of Naples, - Loves of the Harem,- Ellen Percy, Agnes Evelyn, - Pickwick Abroad, Parricide, ... Life In Paris, - - Countess and the Page, Edgar Montrose, CHARLES LEVER’S WORKS. 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The Fallen Angel, Edmond Dantes, George 1 or Planter of Isle of France, Fellna de Chambure, The Horrors of Paris, 75 I Sketches In France, - 73 75 Isabel of Bavaria, - 73 I .Mohicans of Parts, - 30 30 ; Man with Five Wives, 73 73 1 Twin Lieutenants, - 75 75 | Annette, Lady >f Pearls, 50 Copiog of any of the above works will be gent fit atas on raeaint (if the petal! ' " ' * T GREEN S WORKS ON GAMBLING. Gambling Kipoifd, - 1 301 The Reformed Gambler 1 50 The Gambler . Life,- I 30 | Secret Band Brother., 1 30 Above are lu pa|>er cover, or lu cloth at £2.00 each. by Mail, free of Pottage, to any part of the United W 9 a. « . _. ,, . . .... —. A * 4s srdtitttt, rliuiiditilpaJii. P&< w ---------------------