812^159 in tftje mt^ of Hew '^ax% GIVEN BY Q, C. Carper\l'er. RANDOM THOUGHTS. By the Author of "Immaterial Verses," and compiler of "Argyle Verse." PREFACE. Tlie author has no excuses to make in presenting this book to his friends. Neither is he anxious for their praise or censure. It ' was published as a small token of the esteem in which he holds the person to whom he has dedicated the volume, and if she offers him but one word of appreciation, he will be amply compensated for his work, as he values her words more than a whole printed show. May 25, 1899. 295855 Published at New York City by the Composite Printing Company 123 West Fortieth Street 1899 RANDOM THOUGHTS 9 I DEDICATION, j 1 TO A. K. F. 1 Here, as the weeks succeed in rounds of sport or pain, - And life moves on, and hopelessness — naught can it do but wane. As I, who quaff each instant of the way Have paused, for I have found my drop of the ideal, she guides me night and day. So, as a tribute, slighter than a gift of with- ered flowers, I dedicate this thwarted book, a slim remem- brance of most cherished hours. Thou art the only one who fanned my gentler being into life, Thou art the only one who ever calmed my wandering passions rife; Thou art one on whose radiant cheek my kiss was never felt, For on thy brow True Purity is plainly spelt, * « » RANDOM THOUGHTS II And to thy shrine none but the noblest thoughts could rise To reach the level of your favored, violet eyes. Thou art the only one who caused in me ambition's fires to glow anew Each time I saw thy face; and when you van- ished, they did vanish too. •■^Thou art the only one with whom the time I spent, when I retrace My thoughts, the path is rose-strewn, and not a single second would erase. Thou art the only one, whose sight has made me long to be Though never, never to be so, a sharer of thine own Eternity. Thou art the only one, whom first and last I held fast in the same esteem. Amid this jungle- world of tangled shapes who pass before me as a dream. "*hou art the only one, whose pleasure I'd secure, though meaning loss to me; hou art the gentle savior of my days! thou angel builder of my ship that sails o'er love's deep azure sea! RANDOM THOUGHTS 13 IN INTROSPECT. Beneath the reflex of the yellow sky (Which smiles upon the earth), Marshaling forebodings which will come In days deserted, days of dearth, When joy to Nowhere has departed And left a little fear in place of mirth. The nights of those days will be haunted By a reality (not a dream) Which will cast, unaccountable, Its shadow 'cross some pale moonbeam. Then sink to earth, as if disheartened, Shimmering reluctant on each stagnant stream. The unsettled ones of this world (Which is the unseen world of Now) Beholding this speechless phantasm. To rede its silence, all will vow, And follow in its wake, unguided, Like unto a ship without a prow. Towards the end some earth enchanters Possessed of reasonability (braves) Will cry to this moonbeam obscurer. And ask it what it craves. But it shall answer not. And they — return to their graves. RANDOM THOUGHTS THE SPIRIT OF THE CANDLE-LIGHT Here and ever candle-light Beams this wide-walled room to-night, While outside in lightning flash. Silence blank, rain's slipping splash, (Ever dancing, living sprite. The spirit of the candle-light Bums radiant with the storm to-night.) Shadows flickering, flying, yet Streaked with yellow, buff and jet, In askance wander round about, Unmindful of the storm without. (Filling with awe each crevice trite. The spirit of the candle-light Bums radiant with the storm to-night.) Dreams, unmindful of the past. Are coming, leaving, or will last Through the darkness' noisy fray. Fighting its battle, fraught with day. (But sombre, silent in its might. The spirit of the candle-light Burns radiant with the storm to-night.) RANDOM THOUGHTS 17 Spirits unseen, unknown, and not, Shimmer, and die, a wasted lot, While raindrops pour through window shade Enveloped, sheathed, like icy glade. (Yet, though unconscious of the sight. The spirit of the candle-light Bums radiant with the storm to-night.) Vanish all but candle-light, Still is this gloomy room to-night. In wood and bush the storm has stopped, And the last blade of rain has dropped. (But in the darkness, breathless quite, The spirit of the candle-light Is dying with the storm to-night.) RANDOM THOUGHTS 19 TO A LILY OF THE VALLEY. O Lily of the Valley, I love you most purely, Because you are loved by her Fondly and surely. For you have been plucked. You have been pressed To her fair bosom, Loved haven of rest. You wish not to wander, No, neither would I, Btxt in her sweet presence To wither and die. Your life is but short, Still, your pleasures are great, For but a time You are with her in state. 0 poor withered flower. With your usefulness over, 1 don't envy you there, You're a casta-way lover. Though we can't both survive, Sweet Lily so true. So the one that's to perish I hope will be you. RANDOM THOUGHTS 21 CHARON. On the nights, all undefined, Along the banks of a ghastly river Which runs most restlessly, With many a splash and eddying quiver, The souls thai waiteth on ike shore do quake and shiver! A dark galley floats uneasily. Manned by oarsmen bent and thin, Spirits they of condemned men Seeking to expiate their sin, And the hopeless aid of the guardian angel win! Swift is the current, weak the oars, Which plod against the brackish tide; High in the stern an aged gaunt figure Commands the boat to "Onward ride!" But it only rocks with splasli from side to side! Oft in despair these ghastly oarsmen Bury their faces in their hands, Then seize their oars and row desperately . At the steersman's cruel commands, Tliougli far aloft the guardian angel stands! Naught is written in their death-worn features, Time has grown like endless night; Darkness gives but partial veiling To the land that is in sight, Whicli brings longing of the buried sun so bright! RANDOM THOUGHTS 23 DEATH. Dark, unbefriended and alone, With skulking feet and held-in breath He goes his way; short is his stay, This leveller of joy, this Death. Whene'er a smiling group appears. By wayside cot, through palace door. He whets his steel, his victims reel, He looks not twice, but looks for more. The storm, with whom we mortals fight, Is but his ally, staunch and staid; And with the snow, and haily blow, They make all creepers be afraid. The hissing fire, which upward leaps. To join its twin, the sunset red. Turns us to dust, with laughing lust. We of the future dead. The precipice which in our road A yawning, open chasm heaves On every crag, a sharpened snag With death, a richer torment weaves. The ocean wash, and crashing stream. Look beseechingly at him. RANDOM THOUGHTS 25 To laughing hurl unto their swirl, Some children of his whim. We look unto the friendly sun, We learned we looked too well; For that same sun will gladly run. To build for us a hell. Away from such, to softened night. We on its bosom rest at last; Our stay is brief, for on some reef Through darkness we are cast. We hope the mountain to be strong, Stronger than any oaken branch; We snugly hide down at its side. Then comes the avalanche. What feelings of impotency Drive us to devious strife; Then in despair, we breathe the air; Are poisoned by its life. We wait, as prophecies have told. Till Death will shoulder up the scythe that kills. His work all done, his battles won, And vanishes o'er the evening hills. RANDOM THOUGHTS 27 THE DREAM VOYAGE. Veering mist of sliding stars Into thy wake I peer; With sailing shifts I veer The car I built of golden dreams, Laden with thoughts of Beatrice (Whose world is this). Improvised hours of blinking void Encompass me about; Foul birds of black days shout Ever to a goal employed, Where dwells Beatrice (Whose world is this). Strange echoes vacantly call Girt with flaming lodes which fall. Clouding my eyes, o'erstrained Over a horizon deeply stained With thoughts not of Beatrice (Whose world is this). Groans the thunder unheard; Never my sails have stirred Nor whispered around my car; On every side leers the mar, Which speaks naught of Beatrice (Whose world is this). Silence still comes to me, Bringing me verily RANDOM THOUGHTS 29 Into a valley unkissed by wind, And to dry earth I'm pinned Far from the land of Beatrice (Whose world is this). Sudden again I sail, Hugged by a hating gale, But seldom do I approach The sharp mountains, which encroach To the land of Beatrice (Whose world is this). Veering mist of sliding stars. Away from thine eyes I peer, As if a loving voice I hear Murmuring of Beatrice (Whose world is this). Improvised hours of hope Stay me in mid-air. While I vainly grope Above the eagle's nested lair To the valley of Beatrice (Whose world is this.) L'ENVOI. I dwelt in a land of Beatrice (Whose world is this,) Dreaming the hours away In golden bliss. RANDOM THOUGHTS 31 SONG TO I loved a moimtain solitude, Where Heaven and earth were one, And Hell could not intrude Its palsied arm upon, (For that was long ago). I loved each withering pine tree. Ragged on vale or mount, And often vowed in childhood's days To leave on no account, (But waited patiently). I loved a maid in that mountain solitude, But sadder, she lived not there. Her home was down the valley In a city where steeples stare, (Vacantly into the sky). Enticing winds blew down the mountain, Drawing me down the slopes To the dim-sighted city, Where only a blind man gropes, (For all there see too well). RANDOM THOUGHTS 33 Into its hollow streets (new to me) My love for her started to die, Vainly I looked on the seeded park, And then to the blackened sky, (To renew my distant love). Each day brought me less love. Leaving me more forlorn. For I longed for the solitude uncouth Whence I myself had torn, (And thought of love.) Storms blow from the city, But I, wondering, cannot leave, For I wait to take her from it. Pit without reprieve! (And patiently wait the day). RANDOM THOUGHTS 35 THE DECEASED MONARCH. See'st thou on thy gilded throne, There sits another ruling power? Does this not move thy heart of stone In this awful, deadsome hour? Feel'st thou, that in nether time. You shall never summons give? But from out a shadowy clime, Look you on the world who live. For the hours thy dust has lain On this massive, shining bier. In the curious mourning train. Did you a single praise word hear? Thoughts are dull for the hereafter. Not an eye is bleared or red, Amid the hum of inward laughter. Cursed they well thy royal head. Your sole mission in this world Was one of pride, and of death. When grandest banners were unfurled They quickly left thy haughty breath. l' ENVOI. Thus it was in days before. And the future shall not wane, You're but as a link of ore In grave destiny's cold chain. RANDOM THOUGHTS 37 HYMN. My heaven and I belong to the sky, Belong to the sky, Belong to the sky; But the earth which wanders belongs to the earth, Belongs to the earth. Belongs to the earth. Soon we will separate, my heaven and I, My heaven and I, My heaven and I; The earth to the earth, our souls to the sky, Two to the sky, Two to the sky. That I ever shall love you none dare deny. Nor dare deny. Nor dare deny. Yet now were apart though vainly I vie. Though vainly I vie, Though vainly I vie. But time, which is fleeting, quickly does fly. Quickly does fly. Quickly does fly ; And we'll love long before we meet in the sky, RANDOM THOUGHTS 39 Meet in the sky, Meet in the sky. My heaven and I belong to the sky, Belong to the sky, Belong to the sky; But the earth which wanders belongs to the earth, Belongs to the earth. Belongs to the earth. And all other love which beneath us doth lie, Beneath us doth lie. Beneath us doth lie; . Like the rose and the oak-tree shall wither and die, Shall wither and die. Shall wither and die. RANDOM THOUGHTS 41 ON SEEING A COPY OF ROSETTI'S PAINTING OF LILITH. O Lilitli how your daughters thrive upon this, their terrestrial globe; How wide their rule; how they defy the find- ings of the moral probe. All movements which have sought to strike your sceptre have been thrust aside, And forth you step down at each morn from off your throne like some new-chosen bride. Your work lies in the time that is, what was, you are without. For in the soul all depth of feeling lies and holds no space for love's redout. Your daughters (how your breast must heave) whene'er you think what they have wrought Of sickening, suffering, lingering death; each of them crimes which have been bought. Fair Siren, she thy eldest child, lies buried on the pink and pebbled shore. Where whence she sought to lure the seaman on, to leave his bones a tribute to her love- less lore. RANDOM THOUGHTS 43 No more she sits and sings an artful lay, (deep hid beneath the ripples were her clawed feet), For one young traveler choked her as she sang; he was an Epoch where the Ages meet. Ah! she was but a unit of the whole. Thy other daughters practised just the same; Betrayed the great, maligned the good, and plucked back poets from the brink of fame. Until to-day fail we to see the groveling lust; the high esteem In which your daughters drag away their days as worshipped they descend life's stream. Where once a single Siren sat, where once a Discord Brewer roused up spite, We find false daughters, miich more strong than they with painted hair and powdered faces white. All intent on their soulless mission here; bent on destroying all the sex you hate — Proud man: how he atones his sins of long ago; but cares he not. He never prays you to abate Thy potent schemes, thy earthly hell wide yawning in his unslept eyes; He is too brave: he dares you strike him down! for though you stamp on him he will arise! RANDOM THOUGHTS 45 THE ENDLESS LOVE. Within the inner recess of the World, Where Life and Death their final battle waged, And Passion (lurking mistress of them both) Had burst her bonds and was no longer caged. And all the elements had stopped their tasks, (To give impassive interest to the strife), Between the scythe-armed warrior Death, And the olive-branch-armed hero, Life. The sullen atmosphere loud shook (While columns fell, high towers to atoms sunk) To tune of growled applause from Thvmder- gods Helpless with joy from bloodstains they had drunk. Stars fell from out their places in their fear, (Birds battered out their brains on crates of corn), And stricken multitudes lay helpless here And there; foolish that they were ever born. Unearthly noises, hideous shrieks from Hell Resounded, voiced by beauteous vases, cracked By tumbling walls and iron canopies. RANDOM THOUGHTS 47 (A conquered land, by no one to be sacked!) Two lovers still breathed witbin this World, (Among the last survivors of the war were they;) And, huddled 'neath a temple's stricken dome, They kept the shimmering star-dust rain at bay. With upturned eyes they hoped through accident They'd be avoided till the day was done; Then from their hiding place obscure emerge, (Telling the ruin that their love made one.) But no, a watchful satellite of Death, (With forked spear) searched 'mongst the fell debris, Challenging and dragging forth anyone Who hidden, sought such torments to be free. His leering face beneath the temple's fallen dome Peered through, there saw them clasped in each others' arms; The lover, bent (but not with fear) Shielding his loved one from the loud alarms. "Come hence," the demon shrieked to them, (His shrill voice carried more than far,) Back to the tottering Concourse-field, Where Life and Death were still at war. RANDOM THOUGHTS 49 Life dropped his now near broken staff, Death hurled his scythe way into space; When they, from out the battlefield, (Beheld the warring lover's and his loved one's face). Life smiled at Death, Death tried to smile but failed; They clasped their hands, where was the crime? (But as they looked a shudder sent the lovers down The mighty unroofed halls of time.) Darker the sky grew, quicker did the blow (Which bore them to a gale, increase); Their love, like this last journeying. Began in fear, but if it ends, will end in peace. RANDOM THOUGHTS 5i THE MOUNTAIN. Fearlessly jutting into the sky, Into the sky (not the above) Clad in a dress of darkest green, Which to the west wind's call doth move, Whose eyelets are torrents brash (Verily, less eyelets than orbs). In whose far reaching pathway Hillside and valley absorbs; Adding a luster unmeant. As if by chance 'twere sent. Heartless, forsooth, is the mountain of stone (I can tell by averted glance). As when o'erhead and underneath The setting sun in redness slants; The birds which circle now and then, And shriek in frightened accents shrill. And pierce the sea of sodden clouds When another storm is due, A requiem seem to call for you, But the requiem is for them. RANDOM THOUGHTS 53 THE LAWS OF CHANCE. Somewhere, I know not where, Where the laws of chance work slow, Someone has worn the love of her Whom, perhaps, I'll never know. Well, I'm aware we may not meet, (I and my earthly shrine), But if we do, the laws of chance Will surely make her mine. So I place my trust in the laws of chance. For they'll guard my love until — Until by right she'll belong to me, As the laws of chance shall will. RANDOM THOUGHTS SS FALSE LOVE. It is needless to say we have said And thought and acted and prayed; In unrealized days that have fled, In the time that couldn't have stayed. We looked in directions blank, Half frightened, yet boldly, too. And in moments did afterwards thank The Creator, for creating you. We knew that the change would come, Vast, like an open plain; And what did it matter, to more than one. That I never saw you again? The slipping veil, that viciously Parts, and snaps and rends, Importuned Time can never send me; And I take whatever it sends. In the fleeting visions which lasted In truth and in memory gray. Have fled, broken and blasted, Like clouds on a far-off day. RANDOM THOUGHTS 57 TO WILLIAM PENN. Though humble sharer of thy blood am I, I deem in broader tones to voice your praise, And aid the fame which will last till nigh Beyond the very endless days. 'Twas you, who came o'er sinking seas which raise And bid defiance to all those who ply, And through the forest's tangled maze Did build a State whose fame will never die. In fact and not in dreams, your name endures, You as the one whose word did free All creeds and give them peace which will ensure That your name is on high for all to see . I honor you, but humble still, I know no cup of praise for you can ever fill. RANDOM THOUGHTS 59 THE TUBE ROSE. , On a deserted mountain top, Where a pine waved desperately, I entered the cave, With a swinging lantern before me; Wearing her token, The jealous-eyed tube rose, (But longing for you). Who dwell many miles from where the flowers grow. As deeper I went, and shadows deployed me. Speaking, it seemed, to offer me aid; While the tube-rose encompassed me, Drowning your memory, (sweet memory. Heaven born memory). By cruel substitution: But it could not last long, (For I awakened) And seizing the tube rose I flung it away. And your image now flourishes, And shall ever flourish. As long as I bear 'gainst the storms. RANDOM THOUGHTS 6i THE DRIVE. To "G. V. A." Will you ever forget the drive we took Over the sunset hills? For the old horse which bore us along Was not going the pace that kills, And gave us plenty of time to gaze On valley, forest and stream; And feel upon our faces there The force of the night's cold gleam. Will you ever forget that ferry boat Which we tried to work ourselves? When it took us an hour-and-a-half to cross The river's sandy shelves? And lastly, do you remember The drive on the mountain top, When 3''ou looked straight down at the sheer descent Into which 3'ou thought we'd drop? Remember the ghost stories I told you As we passed each shadowy grove? Until you got onto my little trick. And very much faster you drove. But safely home we got at last, With not a single mishap; And we prided ourselves on our subtle skill, In escaping that mountain death-trap. RANDOM THOUGHTS IN SUN AND RAIN. I saw my heaven, Beatrice, to-day, (Dark, rainy day!) And on my soul she cast a ray Which had not shone since a far-away, (Bright, sunny day!) Her I'd not seen in much more than a year- (A stretch so drear!) And I gazed in her eyes so clear, Hoping that some time she'd be ever near, (No longer drear!) RANDOM THOUGHTS 6S AN OPINION. There is no good in any man, That crawling, hating worm of chance. Ready with self-deeds to enhance And win for self all fame he can. He'd place the very heavens under ban. And stop all time, and tides he would advance, Though oft he looks behind with wilful glance, For well he knows he's but a sham. He often prays to gain his ends. Yet knows his earthly days are few; And much before his tragic course is run, He's sleeping 'neath the mystic yew. Where winds and rain are never done Their prayerful cry to make amends. RANDOM THOUGHTS 67 THE COMING OF NIGHT. The afternoon sun o'er the mountain is crossing, And against it the dark pines their shadows are tossing; It shines on the fields in the valley below, And colors the crops with a scintillant glow; It glistens most merrily on the swift-flowing stream And lights up the ripples with many a beam; The sun on the hill top which gazes afar, Perceives to the westward a virgin-eyed star: The afternoon sun hides its face in affright. For it knows that there cometh the mute victor — night. 1892. RANDOM THOUGHTS 69 RANDOM LINES. You were at the games this afternoon; The darkened clouds soon found you there, And quick they parted in a smile To give to you their share Of humble homage there. But when you left, the smiling clouds All darkened when they found Their loss, and sprinkled heart-felt tears Upon the stricken ground. Since you, their queen, were nowhere to be found. RANDOM THOUGHTS 71 EPITAPH FOR A FALLEN PINE TREE. AUGUST 1892. Straight and noble the pine tree stood, Staunch through years 'gainst storm and flood, Until the lightning's cruel stroke On its dark crest, dread hatred broke; Then, dying, to the winds the tree did call To smite it, from its barkless pall; A skeleton, so bleak and grim, A warning of the tempest's vim, Until the North wind's kindly gust Sent it tottering to the dust. RANDOM THOUGHTS 73 THAT EVENING. In pensive mood my mind recalls That pretty maid below in the stalls, On the night we saw the "Power of the Press," And a sigh for joy I can't repress, When I think of the evening so pleasantly spent (But alas, the moments too quickly went). They told me it was a wonderful play, But I read my play-bill dreamily. And thanked kind fate for an evening like this. Within the presence of Beatrice. RANDOM THOUGHTS A SALUTARY. No bright light is needed Thy radiance, when I see, Ever kindles the love-flame Which consumes me willingly. The Creator, beneficent, In your eyes reflects All that is pure and heaven-like. Forgetting the defects. I love you indescribably; And may I ever, so I pray, Until the light's extinguished And night replaces day. RANDOM THOUGHTS TO JULY l6, 1898. Oh, sparkling Oriental maid, Behind your lowered, endless eyes A sea of sizzling passion lies, Too deep for mortal man to wade! Yet longing for a chance to spurt And scald each passerby, but hurt None but the bearer of this sea Of passion surging restlessly. Oft do I feel myself the shore On which the waves a cleft have wore. And hold, restrain the wish to rush at thee. The bearer of this Holy Sea. Behind your eyes I say there rolls a sea Quivering with Love's disparity. Which as it beats on me, the shore, I, like the fabled falling mount of yore. Now crumble, break and rush at thee. The bearer of this Holy Sea. RANDOM THOUGHTS 79 THE BARNARD GIRL. To "A. Wr May, i8g8. Pretty girls at Barnard There are but one or two, And if there happens to be one, That one is surely you. I see you in the cable cars, I pass you in the street. And scarce my feelings can conceal On occasions when we meet. If ever luck will bring these lines Beneath your trenchant eyes,. Think coolly of the motive first, And then express surprise That any one could have the cheek To write you up in verse, (Please wonder who the writer is Who wrote these lines so terse). RANDOM THOUGHTS 8i MEMORIES. Dim shapes of Yesterday, Where will you be To-morrow? I hold the key which sets you free, Dim shapes clothed with sorrow. Out through the rainy fog. Guided by a weeping light, This shadow band from the lowland — Dim shapes who thrive by night — Grasping the corniced walls, Scaling the sharpest window ledge, Open the gate; the hour is late. Dim shapes, fly home below the sedge! For see, where the dull eastern line Rises like a strangled throat! Away, away, dim shapes of Yesterday, Farewell, as through the mist you float I RANDOM THOUGHTS 83 THE STUFFED EAGLE. Suspended from a dusty string In a dingy down town store With wings wide-spread, a stuffed bald-eagle hangs. And as the summer breezes blow Filth-laden through a small window, This regal bird, which once did soar Above the clouds, above the storms, Swings gently round and round. The fierce eyes, aggressive and proud, Replaced by glass beads, stare at space; And as in swinging faces to the left. Reflected in a mirror sees its image face to face. Then silently anon it swings. If there is a spark of spirit left. Can it but feel that some time there will come A day when that vile cord will break. Released of its humbled burden dumb? When a vast black age will reign. And, every feather in its proper place, Will gaze upon a jewelled mirror then. And see its living image face to face. RANDOM THOUGHTS 85 A CONFESSION OF LOVE. I've ever loved but one, (Sweet Kate). And ere each day is done, 'Tis many times I thank Great God For her, my Heaven-one. I've ever loved but one (Sweet Kate). All others I will shun. For Great God watches over her, O'er her my Heaven-one, I've ever loved but one (Sweet Kate). My love burns as the sun. And many times I thank Great God For her, my Heaven-one. RANDOM THOUGHTS ?7 TWO STARS. Two stars shot out from Infinite Space, And in tlie caldron of the Milky Way They tossed about unsought. Each of these stars in Infinite Space Possessed an unknown yearning strong, Which, as a magnet deftly wrought, Bore them along. Once the gay Sunrise, with arms uplifted, Breathed forth the boundless joy That the two stars of Infinite Space Rocked in a likened sphere. Greener the earth became, Brighter the sunbeams danced. Bubbling with pleasure sheer! Tumults came and went unfelt. Higher and lower fell the clouds. But the Ruler of Infinite Space Knew and approved. oidK 159 1 I I i