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FEMALE PIETY:
OR THE'nmtg tnmatn'g       Frinh anh Rb   aiht
THROUGH
LIFE   TO IMMORTALITY.
BY JOHN ANGELL JAMES
KUTHOR OF "THE ANXIOUS ENQUIRER," "TRUE CHRISTIAN," " YOUNG
MAN FROM HOME," "WIDOW DIRECTED," "CHRISTIAN PROFZSSORI" "CHRISTIAN DUTY," "COURSE OF FAITH,"'"YOUNG MAN9S FRIEND," &C. &C.
NEW YORK:
ROBERT CARTER & BROTHERS,
No. 285 BROADWAY.
1854.
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THE INFLUENCE OF CHRISTIANITY ON THE CONDITION OF WOMAN.-_......................... 7
THE CONSPICUOUS PLACE WHICH WOMAN OCCUPIES
IN HOLY SCRIPTURE............................ 38
WOMAN'S MISSION............................. 72
EARLY FEMALE PIETY.-......................... 116
APPENDIX....................................  156
FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.............._. 161
THE YOUNG WOMAN AT HOME-................. 201
THE YOUNG WOMAN AWAY FROM HOME........... 234
CHARACTER OF REBEKAH..-............. 267
THE ORNAMENTS OF AN EARLY FEMALE PROFESSION  OF  RELIGION,........................  305
THE HISTORY AND CHARACTER OF MARTHA AND
MARY OF BETHANY.....-...........  339
TO YOUNG MOTHERS.......................   371
APPENDIX.....-..................... —--—.. —-.  410
SOIOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.........  413
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t[le  ftiinIrr f c hristtiritq nn ttlr  LoUntitbin
u f Wutmau.
" There is neither Jew nor Greek; there is neither bond
nor free; there is neither male nor female: for ye are
all one in Christ Jesus." —GALATIATS iii. 28.
WOMAN was the finishing grace of the creation.
Woman was the completeness of man's bliss in
Paradise. Woman was the cause of sin and death
to our world. Woman was the means of our redemption. Woman is the mother of the human
race; our companion, counselor, and comforter in
the pilgrimage of life; or our tempter, our scourge,
and our destroyer. Our sweetest cup of earthly
happiness, or our bitterest draught of sorrow, is
mixed and administered by her hand. She not
only renders smooth or rough our path to the grave,
but helps or hinders our progress to immortality.
In heaven we shall bless God for her aid in assisting us to reach that blissful state, or amid the torments of unutterable woe in another region, we
shall deplore the fatality of her influence.
Such is my reason for determining, to address a
course of monthly sermons to her sex. They have
i _  _ ___________                - _____         -- _




-8          YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
been too much neglected in the ministrations of the
sanctuary; an omission which must be traced to a
morbid delicacy unworthy of the pulpit. Happily,
this reproach does not appertain to the press, to
which perhaps, in the opinion of some, this subject
ought to be exclusively consigned.  But why?
Can any good and valid reason be assigned for
shutting out from the house of God instructions to
so important a class of the community? Many
persons almost instinctively shrink from such addresses, from a fear lest matters should be introduced at which modesty would blush, and by which
the finer sensibilities would be wounded. There is
a prudishness in such feeling which can be justified
neither by reason nor revelation. You may trust
your pastor for discretion on such a subject, and
feel tolerably certain that he will utter nothing
which shall bring up a tinge of color on the most
modest countenance, or inflict the slightest wound
on the most fastidiously delicate mind.
It may be as well to announce in the opening
sermon, that the whole course will be decidedly of
a religious nature; more so than even the sermons
to young men. For all the general directions and
excellences of female character, I shall refer you to
the various works which on these topics have issued
from the press. My place is the pulpit-my subject is religion-my object is the soul-my aim is
salvation. I view you, my female friends, as destined to another world, and it is my business to aid
and stimulate you, "by patient continuance in well__________________________                        J




INFLUENCE OF CHRISTIANITY.        9
doing, to seek for glory, honor, and immortality,"
and to obtain eternal life. I look beyond the
painted and gaudy scene of earth's fading vanities,
to the everlasting ages, through which you must
exist in torment or in bliss; and, God helping me,
it shall not be my fault if you do not live in comfort, die in peace, and inherit eternal life.
Give me your most serious attention-what is
more, give me your prayers-and especially pray
for yourselves, that in listening to these discourses
you may not be "hearers of the word only, but
doers of it also." Come to each sermon in devout
seriousness of mind. Lay aside all frivolity and
levity. You are not invited to an entertainment,
but to listen to matters of infinite moment, of everlasting importance. The lightness of the concert,
the ball-room, and the theater, would be quite out
of place when called to listen to words whereby
you may be saved.
I could think of no subject with which more
appropriately to commence these sermons, than
that which you are now prepared to hear-THE
INFLUENCE OF CHRISTIANITY ON THE CONDITION OF
WOMAN.
Our FIRST attention must be directed, of course,
to the condition of the sex beyond the boundaries of
Christendom.
It would seem, fiom the words of the original
denouncement upon Eve for her transgression in
eating the forbidden fruit, as if, while yet the first
pair were innocent, there was a more entire equality




10         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
of condition and rights than there was, and is, after
the fall. "Thy desire shall be to thy husband, and
he shall rule over thee." This sounds like something penal, though perhaps some would regard it
as merely predictive, and intended to describe the
cruel and brutalizing tendency of sin, in turning
man, who ought to be the loving companion of his
wife, into a tyrant. How fearfully, if predictive,
this sentence has been fulfilled, the degradation of
woman-her wrongs, her sorrows, and her vices, in
many cases, most painfully attest.
History, which will ever be found to accredit
revelation, proves the fact that in most Pagan and
Mohammedan nations, whether ancient or modern,
woman has been cruelly and wickedly sunk below
her proper level in social and domestic life.
"Hated and despised from her birth, and her birth
itself esteemed a calamity-in some countries not
even allowed the rank of a moral and responsible
agent-so tenderly alive to her own degradation that
she acquiesces in the murder of her female offspring
-immured from infancy-without education-married without her consent-in a multitude of instances sold by her parents-refused the confidence
of her husband, and banished from his table-on
his death doomed to the funeral pile, or to contempt that renders life a burden." In such a condition she has been the household drudge, or the
mere object of passion. She has ministered to the
gratification of man's indolence or appetites, but
has not been his companion, his counselor, or his




INFLUENCE OF CIIRISTIANITY.     11
comforter. In barbarous countries, she has been a
public slave; in civilized ones, very generally a
kind of private mistress. TIer mind has been left
untaught, as if incapable or unworthy of instruction.
She has been not only imprisoned by jealousy in
seclusion, but degraded and rendered vicious and
miserable by polygamy-sometimes worshiped as
a goddess, then fondled as a toy, then punished as a
victim. She could never attain to dignity, and even
with all her brightest charms, could rarely appear
but with the beauty of a doll.
Exceptions to this, of some extent, may be made
in favor of the polished Greeks and proud Romans;
but only to some extent; for did time permit, and
necessity require, it could be shown that even
Athenian refinement and Roman virtue rarely gave
to woman her just rank by the side of her husband,
or her proper place in his affection, esteem, and
confidence. The laws of Rome, it is true, gave to
woman greater liberty and consideration than she
had before received; still, she was so treated even
there as to sink into degradation disgraceful to her
purity, and destructive of her happiness. "No
happy influence did she exert on the public or private welfare of the State. Politicians intrigued
with her; ambition combined'with passion to corrupt her; and her liberty degenerated into licentiousness. Through her influence, the streets of the
capital were sometimes deluged with its best blood;
and to such an extent was her profligacy carried,
that among the decrees which passed the Senate




12          YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND. 
during the reign of Tiberius, against the licentiousness of female manners, it was ordained,'that no
woman whose grandfather, father, or husband, was
a Roman knight, should be allowed to make her
person venal.' The laws of a nation are an instructive and faithful history of its manners. If such
was the condition of a Roman baroness, what must
have been that of the subordinate classes?"
Neither Paganism nor Mohammedanism ever yet
understood the female character, or conceded woman's just claims. In many nations, the degradation has been excessive. You remember, probably,
the reply of a pagan mother, who, having been expostulated with for the murder of her female child,
contended that she had performed an act of mercy
in sparing the babe the miseries of a woman's life.
All travelers.and all missionaries attest the fact of
woman's humiliation, beyond the boundaries of
revelation.*
If we go to the Bible, we shall learn that it is to
Christianity, as distinct even from Judaism, that
* The reader is referred for detailed statements of the
condition of woman in Pagan and Mohammedan countries,
to a very able and interesting work by my friend, Dr. Cox,
of Hackney, entitled, "Female Scripture Biography, with
an Essay oh what Christianity has done for Woman." At
my instigation, I believe, the esteemed Author is about to
publish a new edition of this very valuable work. It is to
me surprising it should have been allowed so long to remain out of print. I am indebted to it for some of the
ideas contained in this chapter, and am happy thus to announce its expected reappearance.




INFLUENCE OF CHRISTIANITY.      13
woman owes her true elevation. Polygamy is, and
ever must be, fatal to female dignity and happiness: this, or at any rate concubinage, was practiced, no doubt, from mistaken views, by the patriarchs, not that it was ever positively sanctioned by
God, for, from the beginning, he made one woman
for one man, and by the providential and extraordinary general equality of the sexes as to numbers,
he still proclaims, in unmistakable language, the law
of monogamy-but to use an expression of the
apostle, "he winked at"* these things: he did not
regard it as innocent or convenient, yet he did not
say much about it, or punish it, but left it to punish itself, which it most certainly did. If we examine the Levitical code we shall find that even
this, though a Divine dispensation, contained some
regulations which evinced that the time of woman's
full emancipation friom a state of inferiority had not
yet arrived: and that it was reserved for that glorious and gracious economy under which we are
placed to raise the female sex into their just position and influence in society. Christianity, as in
other things, so in this, is an enlargement of privilege; and among other blessings which it confers, is
its elevation of woman to her proper place and influence in the family and in society.
SECONDLY. I now go on to consider what there
is in Christianity that tends to elevate and improve
the condition of woman.
To the oppressive and cruel customs of Moham* Acts xvii. 30.
2




14          YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
medanism and Paganism, in their treatment of the
female sex, Christianity presents a beautiful and
lovely contrast; while to the partial restoration of
female rights in Judaism, it adds a complete admission of their claims. It is the glory of our holy
religion, and shows it to be an emanation from the
Divine beneficence, and the friend of humanity at
large, that it is the enemy of oppression in every
form and every condition, and gives to every one
his due. It tramples on no rights-it resents and
resists all wrong; but not one of all the children
of.men is more indebted to its merciful and equitable reign than woman. From Christianity woman
has derived her moral and social influence: yea,
almost her very existence as a social being. The
mind of woman, which many of the philosophers,
legislators, and sages of antiquity had doomed to
inferiority and imbecility, Christianity has developed. The gospel of Christ, in the person of its
Divine founder, has descended into this neglected
mine, which even wise men had regarded as not worth
the working, and brought up a priceless gem, flashing with the light of intelligence, and glowing with
the lovely hues of Christian graces. Christianity
has been the restorer of woman's plundered rights,
and has furnished the brightest jewels in her present crown of honor. Her previous degradation accounts, in part at least, for the instability of early
civilization. It is impossible for society to be per
manently elevated where woman is debased and
servile. Wherever females are regarded as inferior




INFLUENCE OF CHRISTIANITY.       15
beings, society contains within itself, not, indeed,
the elements of dissolution, yet the obstructions of
all solid improvement. It is impossible that institutions and usages which trample upon all the very
instincts of our nature, and violate the revealed
law of God, should be crowned with ultimate suecess. - Society may change in its external aspect, 
may exhibit the glitter of wealth-the refinements
of taste-the embellishments of art, or the more
valuable attainments of science and literature-but
if the mind of woman remain undeveloped, her
taste uncultivated, and her person enslaved, the social foundations are insecure, and the cement of
society is feeble. Wherever Christianity is under- 
stood and felt, woman is free. The gospel, like a
kind angel, opens her prison doors, and bids her
walk abroad and enjoy the sunlight of reason, and
breathe the invigorating air of intellectual freedom.
And in proportion as a pure Christianity prevails,
this will be ever found to be the case.
But all this is vague and general assertion. We
now descend to the proof:
1. Christianity elevates the condition of woman by
its very genius as a system of universal equity and
benevolence. When it descended from heaven to
earth, it was heralded into our world by the angel's
song, " Glory to God in the highest; and on earth,
peace and good will to man." The offspring of Infinite Love, it partakes entirely of the spirit, and
reflects the character of its Divine Parent. It is
essentially and unalterably the enemy of all injusL___,                             ______




16          YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
tice, cruelty, and oppression; and the friend of all
that is just, kind, and courteous. The rough, the
brutal, and the ferocious, are alien from its spirit;
while the tender, the gentle, and the courteous, are
entirely homogeneous with its nature. Tyranny,
whether in the palace or the parlor, it frowns upon
with indignant countenance, while it is the friend of
liberty, and the patron of all rights. The man who
understands its genius, and lives under its inspiration, whether he be a monarch, a master, a husband,
or a father, must be a man of equity and love.
Christianity inspires the purest chivalry-a chivalry
shorn of vanity, purified from  passion, elevated
above frivolity-a chivalry of which the animating
principle is love to God; and the scene of its operation the domestic circle, rather than the tournament. He who is unjust or unkind to any one,
especially to the weaker sex, betrays a total ignorance of, or a manifest repugnance to, the practical
influence of the gospel of Christ. It is a mistake to
suppose that the faith of Jesus is intended only to
throw its dim religious light over the gloom of the
cloister, or to form the character of the devotee; on
the contrary, it is pre-eminently a social thing, and is
designed as well as adapted to form a character
which shall go out into the world in a spirit of universal benevolence: to such a character the oppressor or degrader of woman can make no pretensions.
2. The incarnation of Christ tended to exalt the
dignity of the female sex. His assuming humanity




INFLUENCE OF CHRISTIANITY.       17
has given a dignity to our nature which it had
never received before, and could not have r.ceived
in any other way. Christ is "the Pattern Man"
of our race, in whom all the lines of humanity converge and unite, so far as the existence of our race
goes. " When he took man's nature, he vouchsafed to ally himself to all the members of this ex
tended series, by the actual adoption of that transmitted being, which related him to the rest. lie
not only became like men and dwelt among them,
but he became man himself-an actual descendant
from their first progenitor.?' He was made man.
This is why the existence of human nature is a thing
so precious. By the very manner of his birth, he
seemed to associate himself with our nature. This
appears to be the meaning of the apostle in his
quotation of the eighth Psalm, in the Epistle to the
Hebrews, to show the dignity conferred upon
humanity by its being assumed by so glorious a
person as our Lord Jesus Christ in his divine
nature was. If, then, manhood is honored by Christ
assuming it, how much more is woTnan exalted,
who, in addition to this, was made the instrument
of giving birth to the humanity of Christ!
It is emphatically said by the apostle, "When
the fullness of the time was come, God sent forth
his Son, MADE OF A WOMAN, made under the law."Gal. iv. 4. In the person of the Virgin Mary, and
by her giving birth to that holy Being that was
born of her, the sex was elevated. True, it was a
personal distinction, that she should be the mother
_ 2*.          ___ ___




18         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
of our Lord's humanity; and though she has been
by the apostate Church of Rome wickedly exalted
into an object of idolatrous homage, all generations
justly call her blessed. Yet the honor is not limited to herself, but passes over to the sex which she
represented; and it is this to which the apostle
alludes. He does not even mention the honored
individual, says nothing of the Virgin Mary, but
dwells upon the abstract, general term, " made of
a woman."  Every female on earth, from that day
to this, has had a relative elevation, by and in that
wonderful transaction. Woman is not the mother
of God, as the Papists absurdly, and, as I think,
almost blasphemously, say; but the mother of that
humanity only which was mysteriously united with
Divinity. Does not this great fact say, "Let the
sex which alone was concerned in giving birth to
the Son of God, and Saviour of the world, be ever
held in high estimation."
3. The personal conduct of our Lord during his
sojourn upon earth, tended to exalt the"female sex
to a consideration before unknown.
Follow Him through the whole of his earthly.
career, and mark the attention he most condescendingly paid to, and as condescendingly received from,
the female sex. He admitted them to his presence, conversed familiarly with them, and accepted
the tokens of their gratitude, affection, and devotedness. See him accompanying his mother to the
marriage-feast of Cana in Galilee. See him conversing with the woman of Samaria, " instructing




INFLUENCE OF CHRISTIANITY.       19
her ignorance, enduring her petulance, correcting
her mistakes, awakening her consci onverting
her soul, and afterward employin    s a messenger of mercy and salvation tolr neighbors.
See him rebuking his disciples for discouraging
the approach of mothers and their infants. See
him compassionating the widow of Nain, and restoring her son to life. See himl in the little family of Bethany, blending his sympathies with the
bereaved sisters; and on another occasion entering
into familiar conversation with this same Martha
and Mary, faithfully rebuking one, and kindly commending the other. See him receiving the offerings
of those women who ministered to him of their
substance. Witness the attendance of pious women upon him in the last scenes of his life.  It
was on Mary Magdalene that the honor of the first
manifestation of the risen Saviour was made; and
thus a woman was preferred to apostles, and made
the messenger of the blissful news to them. "The
frequent mention," says Doddridge,. which is made
in the evangelists of the generous courage and zeal
of some pious women in the service of Christ, and
especially of the faithful and resolute constancy
with which they attended him in those last scenes
of his suffering, might be very possibly intended
to obviate that haughty and senseless contempt
which the pride of men, often irritated by those
vexations to which their own irregular passions
have exposed them, has in all ages affected to throw
on that sex, which probably, in the sight of God,




20         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
constituted by far the better half of mankind, and
to whose    lnd tenderness the wisest and best
of men        y  owe, and ascribe much of the
daily comfol  d enjoyment of their lives."
Compare this behavior toward the sex, the chaste,
holy, dignified conduct of our Lord, with the polygamy licentiousness, and impurities of Mohammed;
not merely as evidence of their claims, but as regards their influence upon the condition of woman;
while the one does every thing by example and by
precept to corrupt, to debase, and to degrade, the
other does every thing to purify, to elevate, and to
bless. The conduct of the Arabian enthusiast and
impostor, and not less the boast of his followers
and admirers, are too revolting for description-almost for allusion. But, on the contrary, what one
syllable of the Saviour's utterance, or what one
scene of his life was there which tainted the immaculate purity of his language, or left the slightest stain upon the more than snow-like sanctity of
his character? What part of his conduct might
not be unvailed and described before a company of
the most modest, and most delicate, and even most
prudish-minded females in existencel His treatment of woman raised her from her degradation
without exalting her above her level. He rescued
her from oppression without exciting her vanity,
and invested her with dignity without giving her
occasion for pride. He allowed her not only to
come into his presence, but to minister to his comfort, and inspired her with awe, while he conciliated




INFLUENCE OF CHRISTIANITY.      21
her grateful and reverent affection, and thus taught
man how to behave to woman, and what return
woman was to make to man.    C~onduct of
Jesus Christ toward the female sex,s one of the
most attractive excellences of his beautiful character, though perhaps one of the least noticed; and
to him they must ever point, as not only the Saviour of their souls, but as the advocate of their
rights, and the guardian of their peace.
4. The virtual abolition of polygamy by Christianity is a vast improvement in the condition of
woman. Wherever this prevails, and as long as it
prevails, the female sex must ever be in a state of
degradation and misery. "Experience has abundantly and painfully proved that polygamy debases
and brutalizes both the body and the soul, and
renders society incapable of those generous and refined affections, which, if duly cultivated, would be
found to be the inheritance even of our. fallen nature. Where is an instance in which polygamy
has not been the source of many and bitter calamities in the domestic circle and in the state? 2Where
has it reared a virtuous and heaven-taught progeny?
Where has it been distinguished for any of the
moral virtues, or, rather, where has it not been distinguished for the most fearful degeneracy of manners?" By this practice, which has prevailed so
extensively through nearly all countries and all
ages where Christianity was not known, marriage
loses all its tenderness, its sanctity, and its reciprocal confidence-the cup of connubial felicity is ex



22          YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
changed for that of mere animal pleasure-woman
panders to the appetite of man, instead of ministering to Lomfort-and the home assumes much
of the char r of a brothel. There may be several mistresses, but there can be only one wife, and
though there may be mothers, they are without a
mother's affection; presenting a scene of endless
envy and& jealousy, before which domestic comfort
must ever retire, to make way for mere sensual
gratification.  No stimulus to improvement-to
fidelity-to ambition to please, can be felt, where
the individual may be supplanted the next month
by a new favorite. And thus there is no room and
little occasion for the display of those virtues which
constitute female honor. Here, then, is the glorious excellence of Christianity; inasmuch as it revives and re-establishes the original institute of marriage-restores to woman her fortune, her person,
her rank, and thus her happiness, of all which she
has been cheated by polygamy, and has thus raised
the condition of the female sex to the elevation to
which they were destined by their wise and beneficent Creator. True it is that Christianity has not
by direct, explicit, and positive precept, effected
this great change, so beneficial not only to the sex,
but to society, yet it has done so by an implication
so clear as not to be mistaken as to the reality of the
fact, nor to be resisted as to its obligation. All its
provisions, its precepts, and its promises, go on the
supposition of each man who is a husband being the
husband but of one wife.




INFLUENCE OF CHRISTIANITY.      23
And we would here take occasion to remark
with emphasis upon the adaptation of Christianity
to promote the well-being of the c  unity at
large, by advocating and protecting  rights of
all; by opposing all those evil practices, which insinuate mischief and misery into the great human
family; and by upholding those institutions which
in their turn uphold the interests of nations. The
springs of national prosperity rise from beneath the
family hearth-the domestic constitution is the
mould where national character is cast-and that
mould must of necessity take its form from the
unity, the sanctity, and inviolability of marriage.
5. The jealousy with which Christianity guards
the sanctity of the marriage tie must ever be regarded as having a favorable influence upon the condition of woman. Let this be relaxed or impaired,
and that moment woman sinks in dignity, in purity,
and in happiness. There have been nations in
which the facility of divorce took the place of polygamy, and of course, was accompanied with some
of its vices, and many of its miseries too. This
was eminently the case withl ancient Rome. It is
true this applied rather to Rome in the time of the
Empire, than during the continuance of the Republic, examples of which will be found in the annals
of its history, and allusions to it in the pages of its
poets. Let the nuptial tie be weakened, and the
wife lives in perpetual fear that her union is placed
in jeopardy by a law of which her husband may
take advantage, and at the instigation of passion or
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24          YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
caprice dissolve the bond-and without either penalty, remorse, or shame, dismiss her fiom her home
-and thers an end to her peace, and perhaps to
her purity. For it is to be recollected that it is
she who has most to dread from the license of
divorce. She is likely to be the victim of such a
liberty. With what devout and reverential gratitude should she turn then to that Divine Teacher,
who has interposed with his own personal authority
to strengthen the marriage bond, and to guard it
from being severed at the demand of illicit passion,
or the dictates of humor or caprice. How should
she rejoice to hear Him say, " Whoever shall put
away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall
marry another, committeth adultery; and whoso
marrieth her that is put away, doth commit adultery."-Matt. xix. 9. The indulgence granted to
the Jews of greater latitude and liberty in this
matter, was thus suspended by Christianity; a
greater security provided for woman's honor and
felicity; and a broader basis laid for domestic harmony and happiness.   If it were only for this,
Christianity deserves the gratitude of mankind. It
is only half its glory that it has abolished the custom of many wives; its crowning achievement is
that it has protected the rights, the dignity, and the
comfort of the one wife. It has shut out intruders
from her home, and guaranteed the safe and permanent possession of it to herself.
6. I may surely mention the equal participation
of religious blessings to which women are admitted




INFLUENCE OF CIIRISTIANITY.     25
by the Christian religion. How explicitly and how
firmly has the apostle claimed for woman all the
blessings obtained by Christ for the human race,
where he says, " There is neither Jenior Greek;
there is neither bond nor free; there is neither male
nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus."-Gal.
iii. 28. There is woman's charter of all the blessings
of salvation-there is woman's proof of equal consideration in the sight of God-there is woman's
claim to equal rank in the institutes of man. There
is not a blessing necessary to eternal life, which
they do not receive in the same measure and in the
same manner as the other sex. There is a popular
tradition among the Mahommedans, which is prevalent among them to this day, that women are not
permitted to enter Paradise: the houris of that
region being a special creation for the purpose.
What a degradation is there in such an idea: this
Mohammedanism, and it is in its own spirit, and
harmonizes with its own genius, which regards'
woman more as the slave of man's passions, than as
the companion of his life. Christianity places the
wife by the side of the husband-the daughter by
the side of the father-the sister by the side of the
brother-and the maid by the side of the m',tress
-at the altar of the family-in the meeting of the
church-at the table of the Lord-and in the congregation of the sanctuary. Male and female meet
together at the cross, and will meet in the realms
of glory. Can any thing more effectually tend to
raise and sustain the condition of woman than this?
3




26          YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
God in all his conduct-Christ in his glorious un
dertaking-and the Holy Spirit in his gracious
work-give her her proper place in the world, by
giving her a proper place in the church. It is for
her with peculiar emphasis to say, " God, who is
rich in mercy for his great love wherewith he loved
us, hath raised us up together, and made us sit
together in heavenly places.'>-Ephes. ii. 4-6.
Well have women understood their privileges,
for look into our congregations and churches, and
see how largely they are composed of females.
How many more of their sex than of the other
avail themselves of the offer of gospel mercy, and
come under the influence of religion. It is in the
female bosom, however we may account for the
fact, that piety finds a home on earth. The door
of woman's heart is often thrown wide open to receive this divine guest, when man refuses it an entrance. And it is by thus yielding to the power
of godliness, and reflecting upon others the beauties
of holiness, that she maintains her standing and her
influence in society. Under the sanctifying power
of religion she ascends to the glory not only of an
intelligent, but of a spiritual existence-not only
gladdens by her presence the solitary hours of
man's existence, and beguiles, by her converse and
sympathy, the rough and tedious paths of life; but
in some measure new-modifies, purifies, and sanctifies him by making him feel how awful goodness is.
7. But the finishing stroke which Christianity
gives in elevating the condition of women, is, by in.
I ________ _. ________~   ____




INFLUENCE OF CHRISTIANITY.      27
viting and employing their energies and influence in
promoting the spread of religion in the world; and
thus carrying out, through them also, the great purposes of God in the redemption of the world by the
mission of his Son. To them, in common wtth others,
the apostle says, " That ye also may have fellowship
with us; and truly our fellowship is with the Father
and with his Son Jesus Christ."-1 John i. 3. The
honor so liberally bestowed upon the pious women
of antiquity, in ministering to the personal wants
of the Saviour, and in being so constantly about his
person, was the least of those distinctions designed
for them by our holy religion. They bear an exalted place in those acts and offices which were carried on for the setting up of Christ's kingdom in
the world. How instructive and impressive is it to
hear an apostle say, " Help those women which labored with me in the gospel." —Phil. iv. 3. What
a register of names and offices of illustrious females
do we find in Romans xvi. Priscilla, Paul's helper;
" Mary, who bestowed much labor upon us;" " Tryphena and Tryphosa, who labored in the Lord."
"Phebe, the servant of the church at Cenchrea,"
who was sent to the church at Rome, and intrusted
with so momentous a commission as to bear to that
community of Christians'the Epistle to the Romans,
which, if we may lawfully compare one portion of
Scripture with another, is the most precious portion
of divine revelation. In addition to all this, there can
be but little doubt that in the primitive church, not
only were women occasionally endowed by the




28          YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
spirit with the miraculous gifts of prophesying, but
were also employed in the office of deaconesses.
The Christian church, in modern times, has gone
backward in the honor put upon the female character. The primitive age of Christianity was in advance of ours in the respect thus paid to the female
sex, by officially employing them in the services of
the church, and in the wisdom which made use of
such available and valuable resources. It has been
said that the usages of society have somewhat
changed since that time, so as to render the services of women less necessary now than they were
then. The friendly and social intercourse of the
sexes was more restricted, and females were kept in
greater seclusion. Some truth, no doubt, there is in
these assertions; but perhaps not so much as is by
some imagined. Both general and sacred history
present them to us mingling in the society, and
sharing the occupations of the other sex.
THIRDLY. We now remark that not only does
Christianity thus tend, by its own nature and provisions, to exalt the female character, but it has accomplished this wherever it has prevailed. If we
consult the pages of history, whether ancient or
modern-whether Eastern or Western, we shall find
that wherever the religion of our Lord Jesus Christ
has been successful, there has it achieved the emancipation of woman from her thralldom, and rescued
her from degradation. I refer to modern Europe
in proof of this, and to America. And may I not
affirm that this emancipation and elevation are in
L________________~~~~~~~~~~~__.




INFLUENCE OF CHRISTIANITY.      29
proportion to the purity of that Christianity which
has thus been diffused? Is it not a triumph and
a trophy of Christianity to be able to point to the
most polished nations of the globe as being, at any
rate, professedly Christian; and at the same time to
say, " Look at the improved condition of the female
sex?" What a contrast is in this respect presented
in those countries to all Pagan and Mohammedan
nations.
If we refer to the records of modern missions,
we shall find abundant proof of what the gospel
does for the elevation of the female character. It
has abolished the suttee in India, and the widow is
no longer immolated on the same pile which consumes her departed husband. It has stopped the
suicidal prostration before the idol's car in Ceylonthe drudgery of the wives of all savage tribes-the
incarcerating seclusion of Mohammedan and Pagan
nations-the polygamy, the infanticide, and the
concubinage of all countries whither it has gone.
Yes, Christianity in various parts of the world has,
in modern times, proved itself woman's emancipator and fiiend in many, very many thousand instances. It has brought woman from under the disastrous influence of the pale crescent of the impostor
of Mecca, and placed her in all the irradiating and
enlivening splendor of the Sun of Righteousness.
It has rescued her from what I must consider the
baleful power of the crucifix, and thrown over her
the elevating attractions of the cross.
But there is another and a more familiar way,
3*




30         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
and one nearer home, in which we may see how
Christianity, even in this Christian and Protestant
nation, has benefited and raised the condition of
millions of once wretched and degraded women;
made such not by their own misconduct, but by
the vices and cruelty of their husbands.  How
many wives have been reduced to a kind of domestic slavery by the drunkenness, the infidelity, and
tyranny of those who had pledged themselves to
love and cherish them. Christianity, in its power,
has, in myriads of instances, laid hold of the hearts
of these men, and changed them from vice to holiness; -and now, the husband is as much changed as
the man, and among other evidences of the reality
of the change, and the manifestations of its excellence, is his altered conduct at home, where woman
becomes his wife, instead of being his drudge, his
slave, and his victim. Christianity has thus carried
out its genius and its precepts into the actual elevation of the female character wherever it has gone.
The chivalry of the dark and middle ages, whimsical as the institution seemed, which combined religion, valor, and gallantry, no doubt did something
to accomplish this end. I do not dispute the truth
of the remarks made by a French writer, quoted
in a popular work entitled, " Woman's Mission,"
where he says, that women, shut up in their castellated towers, civilized the warriors who despised
their weakness, and rendered less barbarous the
passions and the prejudices which they themselves
shared. It was they who directed the savage pas.
I




INFLUENCE OF CHRISTIANITY.       31
sions and brute force to an unselfish aim-the de.
fense of the weak, and added to courage the only
virtue then recognized-humanity. But even chivalry derived its existence, in some measure, from
religion. And, after all, how inferior in its nature,
and how different in its influence, was this system
of romance, to the dignified principles and holy
influence of Christianity! It did very well to figure
at the joust and the tournament; in the hall of the
baron, and in the circle of the fair; but its influence-in the domestic scene was still slight as compared with that of the institutions of the New Testament.   It was rather the romance of female
rights and privileges, than a concession of them
made by intelligence, a sense of justice, and an
obedience to the Divine authority; and it may be
questioned whether many an illustrious knight did
not, when the hour of imagination had passed away,
and the ardor of passion had cooled, in the absence
of Christian principles, crush and break the heart
which he had been so anxious to win. It is the
glory of Christianity that it supplies principles
which are rooted in the soul, and sway the conscience, instead of appeals to the imagination, the
senses, and the passions; and that instead of leading its possessor to expend his admiration of woman
amid the exciting scenes of public amusement, it
teaches and influences him first of all to contemplate her where her charms are less meretriciously
adorned-in the retirement of social intercourse,
and there to enjoy them, within the hallowed cir




32          YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
cle of domestic life. It allows of no senseless ado.
ration like that which chivalry promoted, and
which, from its very excess, is likely to be followed with recoil or collapse. What Christianity does
for woman is, to fit her neither to be the goddess
nor the slave, but the friend and companion of man,
and to teach man to consider her in this honorable
and amiable aspect.
It is now quite time to consider what practical
inferences are to be deduced from this subject.
And,
1. Do we not see in it a beautiful exhibition of
the transcendent excellence of our holy religion?  In
every view we can take of Christianity, whether
we contemplate its aspect toward another world or
this, in its relations to God or society, in its sublime doctrines, or its pure morality, we see a form
of inimitable beauty, sufficient to captivate every
heart but that which is petrified by false philosophy,
avowed infidelity, or gross immorality. But never
does it appear more lovely than in its relation to
woman. What equity in holding the balances so
impartially between the sexes! What kindness in
throwing its shield over the weaker vessel! What
wisdom in sustaining the rank and claims of these
whose influence is so important to society, and yet
so limiting those claims that they shall not be carried to such a length as to defeat their own end!
What nice discrimination in fixing her place where
her power can be most advantageously employed
for the cultivation of her own virtues, and the ben.




INFLUENCE OF CHRISTIANITY.       33
efit'of society! "Behold Christianity, then, walking forth in her purity and greatness to bless the
earth, diffusing her light in every direction, distributing her charities on either hand, quenching
the flames of lust, and the fires of ambition, silencing discord, spreading peace, and creating all things
new.   Angels watch her progress celebrate her
influence, and anticipate her final triumphs! The
moral creation brightens beneath her smiles, and
owns her renovating power. At her approach man
loses his fierceness, and woman her. chains; each
becomes blessed in the other, and God is glorified
in both."*
2. May we not affirm that the treatment of
woman, by Christianity, is one of the proofs of its
divine origin?  In this view of it, we include Judaism, with which it must ever be associated as containing a full development of the great truths contained in the symbols of that ceremonial dispensation; though, as we have already shown, even this
is behind the higher excellence of the Christian economy. We have already seen how both Mohammedanism and Paganism degrade the female character and sex. It would seem, therefore, that man,
left to himself, would never have set up a religion
which dealt equitably and kindly with the female
sex. And what has infidelity, without a religion,
done for them? What would it do for them?
Degrade them by demoralizing them. The patrons
of impurity and licentiousness-infidels at heart* Dr. Cox's Essay.




34         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
have put on the cloak of the philosopher, and maxims the most licentious have found their way into
works of pretended morality, and have been inculcated with the airs of a moral sage. Atheism, the
most undisguised, has made its appearance, and
alas, aas! that it should boast of a well-known
priestess to conduct its homage at the shrine and
upon the altar of chance! Before skepticism had
reached this depth of error, and arrived at these
gloomy regions of a godless void-while yet it lingered on the shores of deism, it manifested its demoralizing tendency. Hume taught that adultery,
when known, was a slight offense; and when unknown, no offense at all. Bolingbroke openly and
violently attacked every important truth, and every
serious duty. Particularly he licensed lewdness,
and cut up chastity and decency by the roots.
Lord Herbert, of Cherbury, the most serious of the
early English deists, declared that the indulgence
of lust is no more to be blamed than the thirst of
a fever, or the drowsiness of lethargy. Nor have
modern infidels been behind their predecessors.
Godwin and Owen have attacked the marriage tie.
And let the annals of the first French Revolution,
that terrible eruption from the volcano of atheism,
tell by the history of Mirabeau, its type, both as
regards politics and morals, what infidelity would
do to corrupt and degrade the female sex. Woman's
virtue, dignity, honor, and happiness, are nowhere
safe but under the protection of the Word of God.
The Bible is the egis of the female sex. Beneath




INFLUENCE OF CHRISTIANITY.       35
this protection she is secure in her rights, her dignity, and her peace. It is her vine and fig-tree,
under which, in calm repose, she may enjoy the
shade of the one, and relish the fruit of the other,
none daring to make her afraid. It protects her
purity from taint, and her peace from disturbance.
Let woman know her fiiend, and her enemy too.
An infidel of either sex is the foe of our species,
either individually or collectively viewed; but a
female infidel is the most dangerous and destructive of the furies, from whom, in the prosecution
of her suicidal career, the virtuous of her sex recoil
with horror, and whom the vicious regard as the
abettor, it may be, the unintentional one, of their
crimes. Woman! regard thy Saviour for the next
world as thine emancipator for this present one;
love the Bible as the charter of thy liberty, and the
guardian of thy bliss; and consider the church of
Christ as thine asylum fiom the wrongs of oppression, and the arts of seduction.
3. Let woman seek to discharge her obligations
to Christianity. Grateful she ought to be, for immense are the favors which have been conferred
upon her. It is enough to demand her thankfulness,
that in common with man, she is the object of divine love, redeeming mercy, and the subject of immortal hope; but in addition to this, she is rescued
from oppression and exalted to honor in the present
world. In regard to this, your obligations to Christianity are immense. You owe infinitely more to
it than you ever reflect upon, or than you will ever




36          YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
be able to cancel. Often as you look round upon
your condition in society, and especially as often as
you contrast your situation with that of women in
Pagan countries, let a glow of gratitude warm your
heart and add intensity to the fervor with which
you exclaim, "Precious Bible." Yes, doubly precious to you, as your friend for both worlds. How
shall woman discharge her obligationsl In two
ways. First, in yielding up her heart and life to the
influence and service of her benefactor-in the way
of faith, holiness, and divine love. Female piety is
the best, the only sincere expression of female gratitude to God. An irreligious woman is also an ungrateful one. She that loves not Christ, whomsoever else she may love, and however chaste and
pure that love may be, is living immeasurably below her obligations, and has a stain of guilt upon
her heart and her conscience which no other virtue
can efface or conceal.
Her obligations should also be discharged by
seeking to extend that benign system to others
which has exerted so beneficial an influence upon
herself. Of all the supporters of our missionary
schemes, whether they are formed to evangelize tha
heathen abroad, or reform the sinful at home, women should be, as indeed they generally are, the
most zealous, the most liberal, and the most prayerful supporters. Wherever she turns her eye over
the distant regions of our earth, at least wherever
Paganism or Mohammedanism throw their baleful
shadow-and alas! how large a portion of the earth
___________




INFLUENCE OF CIIRISTIANITY.     37
that is-there she beholds her sex degraded and
oppressed. From China's vast domain-from India's sunny plains-from Persia's flowery gardens
-from the snows of Arctic regions-from the sterile deserts of Arabia-and from the burning line of
Africa-woman lifteth up her voice from the midst
of her wrongs, her woes, and her miseries, piteously
imploring, " COME OVER AND IIELP US." The whole
creation groaneth and travaileth in pain together
until now, but her groans are deeper, her cries
louder, than those of any other. Floated upon the
wings of every breeze, and borne on the bosom of
every wave that touches our shore, from those regions of sin and sorrow comes the petition to Christian females in this country for the blessings of
Christianity. Cold, thankless, and unfeeling must
be that heart which is unaffected by such an appeal,
and makes no effort to respond to it-which
prompts to no interest in our missionary schemes,
and leads to no liberality in their support. The
Millennium will be especially woman's jubilee, and
as no groan is deeper than hers during the reign of
sin and sorrow, so no joy will be louder than hers
under the reign of Christ. It belongs therefore to
her to be most fervent in the cry of the church,
"Come, Lord Jesus, come quickly."
4




IpE    nRopiruinng 4lare muiiry Wnmau nrrnpis i1  3nlq IrripturL.
"After this manner in the old, ime the holy women also,
who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in
subjection unto their own husbands."-1 PETER, iii. 5.
IT will probably be objected against some of the
subjects selected for this course of Sermons, that
they are not exclusively appropriate to the class of
persons to whom they are addressed-that is, Young
Women. This, however, so far from being a fault,
is an excellence. Most conditions of human life
are prospective, and have not only some proximate
object and duties connected with them, but also
some ultimate ones to which the others look onward; and he who would lead persons to the right
discharge of the whole range of their obligations,
must set before them the future as well as the present, especially when the due preparation for the
remote must not only be made in the present, but
must be considered to a considerable extent the object and design of the present. Neither childhood
nor youth is an ultimate condition of human existence, but each leads on, looks to, and prepares for




WOMAN'S PLACE IN SCRIPTURE.       39
manhood or womanhood. Surely it must be appro
priate then to those who are already arrived at adult
age, or are fast approaching it, to have the whole
view of their future condition laid before them, at
least in general outline. How else can they prepare for it?
Those to whom the following discourses are addressed, are supposed to have arrived at that period
of youth, when the judgment is sufficiently matured
and reflective to be capable of studying and appreciating their future relations and duties, and who,
therefore, ought to have the subject laid before
them. Who can be rightly educated for any future
situation, from whom it is concealed till all its obligations and responsibilities burst suddenly upon
them? True, there is in some minds an almost instinctive kind of perception of what is proper to be
done in any new conjuncture of circumstances, so
that almost without training, they are prepared for
whatever situation is before them. But this is not
the case with all. The greater number of mankind
must, as far as possible, be trained for the various
situations of life. As in the education of a boy,
especially when learning a t*ade or profession, the
future good tradesman, master, father, and citizen,
must be set before him as that for which le must
prepare himself; so in the training of young wornen, the whole of womanhood, in its full expansion,
ripened excellences, and complete relations, obligations, and responsibilities must be laid before them.
We know that there is much which can be learned




40         YOUNG WOMAN S TRIEND.
only from experience, yet is there much also that
may be learned by observation, reading, and reflection. Mothers and governesses, authors and preachers, who take up the subject, should ever bear in recollection that the girl is to develop in the woman;
and in teaching the girl, should ever have their eye
fixed ultimately upon the woman, and should with
all possible earnestness fix the eye of the girl also
upon her future womanhood. Not that she is to be
so taken up with the remote as to neglect the proximate-the future as to neglect the present-or to
acquire that precocious matronly air and gravity
which shall repress the ardor and vivacity of youth,
and by anticipated cares and solicitudes go out to
meet half-way the coming troubles of life. Remember, then, my young female friends-and the lesson
can not be too deeply impressed upon your mindsthat the seeds of woman's life-long excellences must
be sown in the spring-time of life; and it must be
done in part by her own hand, though aided and
taught by others to prepare the soil. The very
flowers of womanly excellence she would have to
grow in her future character, must be previously and
carefully selected, and be contemplated and anticipated by her in all their full-blown beauty and their
richest,fragrance, even while she is yet in youth.
With these remarks as our justification in presenting to the younger of the sex, what in fact appertains
to the more advanced in years, we now advance to
the subject of the present sermon.
When we consider the importance of woman in




WOMAN'S PLACE IN SCRIPTURE.      41
the great human family, it would be strange if in a
volume given by inspiration of God for regulating
the conduct, and promoting the happiness of mankind, she had no place assigned to her, commensurate with the influence she is destined to exert. The
Bible gives us an account of the origin and construction of societ', and is designed, among other and
still higher purposes, to direct its movements and
promote its welfare. This it could not do, if it left
out woman; or if it failed to bring her prominently
forward, or did not prescribe with much form and
detail, her rank, her mission, and her duties. In the
coins which were struck in the reigns of our William
and Mary, when the wife was queen regnant as well
as queen consort, the busts of both husband and
wife were represented on the face of the coin-the
king in front, and the queen next-so if a frontispiece were designed for the human history of the
Bible, man and woman should be exhibited in something of a similar manner, with this inscription round
the two-fold portrait-MALE AND FEMALE CREATED
HE THEM.
The subject of this Sermon was entered upon in
the last; it will be here continued and expanded
into wider dimensions. Man, of course, is the chief
subject of revealed truth. He occupies there, as he
does in society, the first place. More is said of him,
to him, and by him, than applies to woman. He is
the prime actor, but not the sole one, in the great
drama of Providence, as it is developed in the pages
of inspiration. His companion in pilgrimage is
i~~~~~~4




42         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIENI.
brought forward into notice, and does not sink into
his shadow, or peep out occasionally only from behind his more portly form and loftier stature. Her
name and history, her virtues and vices, her services
and sorrows, occupy a considerable space in the holy
canon. She has no right to complain that she is
overlooked or forgotten, or that she is thrust into a
corner and hidden from observation. There is more
than enough said about her to make her contented.
She ought to be thankful, and without divine grace,
may even be tempted to be vain. She can not be
deprived of self-respect, or of the respect of others,
on account of the manner in which she is treated in
the Scriptures. In this respect the Bible stands a
bright and beautiful contrast to the Koran.
We shall FIRST of all advert to the account which
the Bible gives of woman's creation andfall, in the
book of Genesis. We would, in passing, remark,
that it is to revelation, and to that alone, we are indebted for our knowledge of the origin of the human
species. Without the Mosaic account of the creation,
we know neither the date nor the source of the farmily of man. There is no other oracle which can
give a response to the question, " Whence came we?"
This furnishes an answer, and satisfies the inquirer:
but not as some would pretend, with a mere allegorical history, but with a veritable fact. I need not
recite the details of the scenes cf Paradise, but only
refer to them. It is at once a beautiful and a melancholy record. We there see woman as she came
from the hand of the Creator, with a body that com_____-_____-_____________________J




WOMAN'S PLACE IN SCRIPTURE.         43
bined every charm which could captivate the being
for whose companionship she was designed, and a
soul that comprehended every virtue that could adorn
the character, and make her an object of reverent
affection. Her creation was peculiar, but not unworthy the Great Being that made her, of herself,
or of him fiom whose own body she was derived.
Her very origin seemed to dignify both her husband
and herself. She was a part of his own frame.
Here was his honor. She was formed of organized
and vitalized matter, and not of mere dust-here
was her distinction. Who can describe, or who conceive the thoughts or emotions of this holy pair at
their first interview? Our great bard has attempted
it in his immortal verse, where he says,
"I beheld her, not far off,
Such as I saw her in my dream, adorn'd
With what all earth or heaven could bestow
To make her amiable; on she came,
Led by her heavenly Maker, though unseen,
And guided by His voiceGrace was in all her steps, heaven in her eye,
In every gesture; dignity and love.
I, overjoy'd, could not forbear aloud-Thou hast fulfill'd
Thy words, Creator bounteous and benign,
Giver of all things fair! But fairest this
Of all thy gifts! nor enviest. I now see
Bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh, myself
Before me: Woman is her name; of man
* Extracted: for this cause he shall forego
Father and mother, and to his wife adhere;
And they shall be one flesh, one heart, one soul."
_________________________!~~~~~~~~~~~




44         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
Painters and sculptors have joined with poets, to re.
present to the senses and the imagination the first
woman, in all her untainted loveliness. It is the
Scriptures, be it recollected, that supplies to them
all the enrapturing subject of their art.
Thus far we see woman, man's companion; in holiness and bliss, tenanting with him the Garden of
Eden, enjoying its beauties, and helping to preserve
them. With him, joining in the morning song and
vesper hymn. Confessing no sin, for they had committed none; pouring out no sorrow, for they felt
none; and disburdening themselves of no care, for
none pressed upon them. All was praise, while
their own notes of thanksgiving, blended with the
melodies of the grove and the music of the fields,
caused even the ear of God to listen with delight,
and to say, "It is all very good."
Alas, how soon and how suddenly changed this
scene of Paradisaic bliss! Man was placed in Eden
not as we shall be in heaven, if we are so happy as
to reach it, in a state of confirmed happiness; but
as we are now upon earth, in a condition of probation. His submission to God must be tested; and
this was done in a manner that exactly suited his
condition. A garden became his state of innocence
as a residence; and the fruit of a particular tree
equally well suited his circumstances for the proof
of his entire and implicit subjection. The test was
as easy as it was rational and suitable. Traditions
of the state of primeval felicity are current among
many nations. They are discoverable in Grecian
1_________                                     _




WOMAN'S PLACE IN SCRIPTURE.      45
and Roman history, in the fables of the gardens of
Flora, of Alcinous, and of the Hesperides; and in
the pleasing fiction of the poet's golden age. To induce Adam to eat of the forbidden fiuit was the
scheme of Satan for his fall. It is difficult to conceive in what other way he could tempt them. And
how did he succeed? You know the melancholy
sequel. The assault of the tempter was made upon
woman. She wnas the selected victim of his wiles.
It is evident, therefore, that he regarded her, while
in a state of innocence, as more likely and easily to
be vanquished than man; and thus considered her,
even then, as the weaker vessel. At the same time,
does it not seem as if he had marked her out from
the beginning, as the chief instrument for accomplishing his future purposes of mischief toward the
family of man? Events have justified the sagacity
of his malignity: for to her influence how much may
be traced of the crimes and calamities which desolate
our earth. He saw in the conduct of the first pair
the love which woman inspires and cherishes, and
was confident that if he could subdue her, he might
leave her to subdue the man.
The apostle in referring to this event says, "Adam
was not deceived, but the woman being deceived,
was first in the transgression."-1 Tim. ii. 14. From
the very creation, woman has shown a feebler power
of resistance, a greater pliancy of disposition, than
man. How Satan should know this, we are not informed; but that he did know it, is evident from
his commencing the assault on Eve instead of Adam,




46          YOUNG WOMIAN S FRIEND.
The passage just quoted seems to imply all this. It
is not meant that Adam did not sin, and was not
deceived by the tempter, but that the woman opposed a feebler resistance to the temptation than he
would have done; and that the temptation, as applied to her mind, would have been ineffectual on
him. To tempt and seduce him to sht, there needed
all the soft persuasions the entreaties, and example
of his wife. Satan understood this, and approached
man not with the specious argument of the serpent,
but through the allurements of his wife. Somne have
supposed that Adam was not at all deceived by the
tempter; that he saw at once all his suggestions
were lies; but that foreseeing what Eve had done,
how she had plunged herself into ruin, he, out of
mere love to her, and with his eyes open, determined
to share her fate. But the apostle's words do not
necessarily convey this; but merely that he was not
deceived first, nor directly, by the tempter, but after,
and by his wife. Her fall was occasioned by the
deception of Satan alone; his by. the deception of
Satan, aided by the persuasion of the woman.*
SECONDLY. Having considered the Scriptural account of woman's condition at the creation, and the
means by which, through her, the human race was
brought into its present state of sin and misery, we
may next notice the very explicit and frequent mention which is made in the Scripture of her numerous
relations in social life, with the descriptions it gives
of her various characters. It certainly tends deeply
* See Barnes's Note on the passage.




WOMAN'S PLACE IN SCRIPTURE.       47
to impress us with the importance of woman, and
to raise her in her own and in our estimation, to see
how every one of her relations is constantly brought
before us on the sacred page, as if the duties connected with each were of vast consequence to society.
Not one is omitted: all are recognized and dwelt
upon. Woman is ever before us in one or other of
her many relations to the community.
Not only is there much said about the son, but
also about the DAUGHTER. This relationship is not
only included in the generic term of children, but it
is also set out by itself in its own species. How
commonly is it mentioned in connection with the
children of the other sex, and "the sons and the
daughters"' are spoken of. A beautiful instance of
which we have in the words of the Psalmist, "That
our sons may be as plants grown up in their youth;
and our daughters may be as corner-stones, polished
after the similitude of a palace." Or, "as corner
pillars, wrought like those of a palace," that is, in
their fittest and best proportions, combining strength,
beauty, and symmetry, both of body and of soul 
than which, no comparison can be more elegant and
delicate. In the exquisite poetry of the Hebrews,
how commonly is this relationship employed as the
metaphor of countries, states, and cities! Jerusalem
comes before us as " the DAUGHTER of Zion," sometimes jubilant in her prosperity, and then, as in the
lamentations of Jeremiah, covered with sackcloth
and bathed in tears.
The word SISTER occurs almost in every portion
__________________]~~~~~~~~~~~~




48          YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
of the Word of God, like a floweret, lowly and
lovely amid others of larger growth and more imposing form and color. How sweet and gentle a
spirit is sometimes seen in that sister's form amid
her brothers' more robust ones; and what a softening
influence does the spell of her fascinating tenderness
throw over their ruder natures.  Thus we are reminded by Scripture, that the younger female
branches of the family are to be thought of as
having their separate claims upon parental regard
and brotherly affections. Hlow many families are
laid open in the Bible to our view, of which the
sisters, as well as the brothers, are brought prominently into notice.
How much may it be supposed would be said
about the WIFE: and how much is said about the
close and endearing relations. To form the character, and direct the conduct of the Zife, is worth all
the pains that have been bestowed by innumerable
writers;- and we might have been very sure, even
before we had read a page of revelation, that much
would be there found touching this relationship.
The book of Proverbs, that admirable manual for
domestic and social life, is quite a manual for wives,
as well as for every other member of the family
circle. Unusual pains seem  taken for the right
* Mrs. Ellis's admirable works to females, as Woman,
Wives, Mothers, and Daughters, need no recommendation
of mine. The public have already set their seal of approbation upon them, by the several editions through which
they have passed.




WOMAN'S PLACE IN SCRIPTURE.     49
formation of her character. How frequently and
how impressively does Solomon refer to woman, as
sustaining this close and tender relation. In what
exalted and glowing terms does he speak of it,
when it comprehends the graces and the excellences
which it should always possess, "Whoso findeth a
wife, findeth a good thing."-Prov. xviii. 22. " A
prudent wife is from the Lord."-xix. 14. Who
has ever read, or can read, without admiration, his
beautiful description of a virtuous woman, in the
closing chapter of his inestimable Proverbs? Can
we wonder that he who had this elevated idea of
the value of such a companion, should again and
again exhort the young husband to live joyfully
with the wife of his youth, and, forsaking all others,
cleave to her alone? In this he did but copy the
beautiful and poetic picture of connubial happiness
which had been furnished to him by his father
David, if, indeed, he was the author of that Psalm,
"Thy wife shall be as a fruitful vine by the sides
of thine house; thy children like olive-plants round
about thy table." —Psalm cxxviii. 3. " The vine,"
says Bishop Horne, "a lowly plant, raised with
tender care, becoming, by its luxuriance, its beauty,
its fragrance, and its clusters, the ornament and
glory of the house to which it is joined, and by
which it is supported, forms the finest imaginable
emblem of a fair, virtuous, and faithful wife. The
olive-trees planted by the inhabitants of Eastern
countries round their banqueting places in their
gardens, to cheer the eye by their verdure, and to
________ —5__




50          YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
refresh the body by their cooling shade, do no less
aptly and significantly set forth the pleasure which
parents feel at the sight of a numerous and flourishing offspring."
On the other hand, Solomon directs all the
powers of his bitter eloquence and irony against
the degraded woman, whose deadly work none has
ever signalized with more holy indignation. How
does he brand the crime of the harlot in the second
and fifth chapters of the book of Proverbs; and
with what awful correctness describe the conduct
of the adulteress in the seventh.  Nor does he
stop here, but descends to the characters of women
who, though less guilty than those to whom we
have just alluded, are still deserving of severe reprobation-" The foolish woma^, who plucketh her
house down with her hands" (xiv.): " the brawling
woman, whose society is more intolerable than
dwelling in a corner of the house-top, or in the
wilderness" (xxi. 9-xx. 24): "the woman that
maketh ashamed, who is a rottenness in the bones
of her husband" (xii. 4): " the odious woman, whose
marriage is one of the four things for which the
earth is disquieted, and which it can not bear"
(xxx. 23): "the fair woman without discretion,
whose beauty is like a jewel of gold in a swine's
snout" (xi. 22): " the contentious wife, that continual dropping on a very rainy day" (xix. 13).
This same Solomon, at the period when he had
reached a penitent and reformed old age, and when
all the events of his life had passed in review before




WOMAN'S PLACE IN SCRIPTURE.      51
him, is compelled to confess that he had sought ir
vain for a woman after his own heart: " I find more
bitter than death the woman whose heart is snares
and nets, and her hands as bands: whoso pleaseth
God shall escape fiom her; but the sinner shall be
taken by her. Behold, this have I found (saith the
preacher), counting one by one, to find out the account, which yet my soul seeketh, but I find not:
one man among a thousand have I found; but a
woman among all those have I not found."Eccles. vii. 26-28. Let not this passage, however,
be mistaken, as if it meant that it was Solomon's
opinion that the number of good women is inferior
to the number of good men.    Observation and
general testimony assure us that this is not the
truth. We are to consider where he made his inquiry for female virtue, and under what circumstances it was made. He who had crowded his
court with wives and concubines, could little expect
to find female- excellence in such a situation. Instead of concentrating his affections on one woman
as his wife, the partner of his joys and sorrows,
and seeking his happiness in drinking with her the
sweet cup of connubial bliss, he had gathered round
him in his harem, for pride and sensuality, a multitude of women, amid whose jealousies and contentions he could no more find happiness than he
could virtue amid their illicit pleasures.  From
such a scene virtue would retire abashed and weeping. If, therefore, in this passage, he satirized the
sex, he did it on unjust, unwise, and unmanly




52         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
grounds. "But," says Dr. Wardlaw, "I am far
from thinking that he here speaks the language of
a disappointed and waspish satirist. He rather
utters the feelings of an abased and self-dissatisfied
penitent, of one who had felt it to be'an evil and
a bitter thing,' to depart as he had done from God,
who remembered'the wormwood and the gall;'
who perceived and lamented the folly and the wickedness of all those'inventions,' by which himself and
others had sought to find out happiness apart from
the favor and the ways of God."
If we speak of woman as a MOTHER, how often
does that endearing relationship come upon us in
holy Scripture: both literally and metaphorically,
both in the Old Testament and in the New, both
in the way of example and of precept. The maternal relationship is the theme of constant reference,
both for the sake of illustrating other subjects, and
for enforcing its own claims as those of the female
head of the household. Had this character been
omitted, or only introduced occasionally, and then
invested with no more than a second-rate importance,
the Bible would have been wanting in one of its
sweetest harmonies with the feelings of nature, one
of its strongest appeals to the sympathies of humanity: and we should have doubted if it had come
from Him who created woman and gave her as a
helpmeet for man. The paternal character and relation are maintained in their primary rank, and authority, and dignity; no invasion is made upon the
prerogative, or usurpation of the rights of the father




WOMAN S PLACE IN SCRIPTURE.       53
-he is not called to yield his place of rule, his su
premacy of condition, to the mother; and yet how
is all her proper rank, and station, and influence
maintained. There she is exhibited as being in the
family circle, if not the circumference which includes
all, yet in one sense as the center, in which husband,
children, and servants, all meet. How resonant are
the Scriptures with that sweet and tender vocablehow redolent with the fragrance of that odoriferous
word-how rich with the ornament of that beautiful
term-A MOTHER. There is sustained the poet's
declaration"A mother is a mother still:
The holiest thing alive."
If the mother's importance be not known-the
mother's claims not conceded-her influence not
felt-her duties not rightly discharged-it is not the
fault of the Bible, which is the friend of society by
exalting the relationship of a mother. Nor is the
MISTRESS overlooked or forgotten, nor her duties left
out of consideration.
The wIDow-that name for desolation-that sorrowful epithet-that type of woe, meets us at every
turn. She passes before us in her weeds and in her
tears, leading in her hand her fatherless children, and
saying to us, "Pity me, pity me, O my friends, for
the hand of God hath touched me!"  More is said
about, and for, and to, this bereaved one, than to any
other class of women: a circumstance which exhibts with uncommon force and beauty the compassion
5*




54          YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
of God. But there is a discrimination on this sub.
ject which shows the wisdom as well as tenderness
of God. Young and vivacious widows are admonished, while aged and helpless ones are comforted.
-1 Tim. v.
Nor is the FEMALE SERVANT left out. A place for
her is found among the various other and higher
ranks and conditions of her sex. Her humble lot
is recognized amid the provisions and commands of
the ]aw, and was announced and defended by the
thunders of Mount Sinai. We find it protected by
precept and illustrated by example, as if woman in
her lowest grade of society should not be overlooked in the Bible-that blessed and glorious charter
of rights and privileges. There the little maid lifts
up her head among the queens and the peeresses of
Scripture history.
THIRDLY. But the most impressive and important point of view in which this subject can be
placed, and the most convincing proof of the bearing of Scripture on woman's sex, is the very great
number and variety of female EXAMPLES in the
Word of God. It is one of the surpassing excellences of the Bible, that it is replete with narrative,
history, and biography. And thus, apart from its
sacred character and its momentous importance, it
is one of the most entertaining books in the world.
It is full, not only of precept, but of living, acting
patterns of the virtues it inculcates and of the vices
which it prohibits. It is a complete picture gallery, in surveying which we see portraits of every
-            ~~                       *~ — * _ _ _ _ ____   I




WOMAN'S PLACE IN SCRIPTURE.      55
size, from the miniature to the full-length painting,
and in every degree of representation, from the
mere outline to the most finished production of the
artist's pencil. Among these it would have been
strange if female characters had been wanting.
They are not wanting. There, amid kings, priests,
warriors, and prophets, are to be seen, profusely
intermingled, the portraits of " the holy women of
the old time, who trusted in God," as well as of
those who had disgraced themselves and dishonored
their sex. In the great drama of life, as it passes
before us in the Bible, no mean or inconsiderable
part is assigned to female character. Her place
among the dramatis personce is not that of some
airy vision which lights upon our path, and which,
after surprising and dazzling us for a moment,
straightway vanishes and is seen no more, but of
one of the veritable actors in almost every place
and every scene.
The sacred volume opens, as we have already
seen, with Eve in Paradise, all beauty, innocence,
and smiles, as its lovely frontispiece; and then
shows us that same Eve, impelled by the vanity
which she has bequeathed as a mournful legacy to
her daughters, reaching forth her hand at the instigation of the tempter, to pluck that fruit which was
the test of her obedience, and the hinge of our destiny, and thus exhibiting to us the sad association
of beauty with sin. In tracing woman's history
from Paradise as the starting-point, as it is set
forth on the page of Scripture, we will look first at




56          YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
the darker side of the narrative. How soon do we
see Adah and Zillah, women of the antediluvian
world, consenting to be the joint wives of Lamech,
and thus giving, for aught we can tell, the original
pattern of that bane of domestic happiness-polygamy.-Gen. iv. 19-24. Then come " the daughters of men"-the women in the line of Cain, who
made no profession of religion, but lived in atheism-seducing and corrupting " the sons of God"the female line of Seth and the professors of godliness-and thus preparing the way by these unsuitable and incongruous marriages, and the universal
corruption that followed, for the waters of the
deluge to wash away the moral filth of the old
world.-Gen. vi. 1-7.  Hagar comes next, troubling the faith, charity, and peace of Abraham for
a time, persecuting the child of promise, and at the
same time correcting by her waywardness the
weakness of the patriarch, whose concubine she
was. Then that family of Lot-the poor, earthlyminded mother, that was so wedded to Sodom as
to cast the lingering, longing look behind, which
transformed her into a pillar of salt; and the disgusting conduct of her incestuous daughters, who
showed too well how they had been corrupted by
the place of their abode, and how careful all parents
should be to remove their children from the polluting influence of evil examples.-Gen. xix.
What a revolting pattern of an adulterous woman,
and to hide her shame, of a cruel slanderer, is
Potiphar's wife!-Gen. xxxix. Then there was the




WOMAN S PLACE IN SCRIPTURE.        57
ensnaring and successful temptation offered by the
daughters of Moab to the children of Israel in the
wilderness.-Numbers xxvi.'How mighty and
how fatal were the powers of harlotry in Delilah, to
subdue the strength and extort the secrets of Sampson; and what a forcible picture of man's weakness
before woman's vicious wiles has it furnished to all
coming ages! Who does not think of Bathsheba
consenting to David's wicked proposals, and thus
causing him for a while to cease to be David 
And then the strange women that threw even the
mighty intellect of Solomon into the awful eclipse
of idolatry! Jezebel, that Zidonian idolatress, who
instigated her husband to the murder of Naboth,
and exasperated the mind of Ahab to a more
intense degree of wickedness than he would otherwise have attained to. —1 Kings xxi. And Athaliah, that turbulent and idolatrous queen-mother,
who counseled her son to do wickedly, and was assassinated by command of Jehoiada, the priest.*2 Chron. xxii.
* I have forborne, of course, to dwell on the examples
and descriptions of female delinquency recorded in the
Scriptures. Such instances are intended to be read alone,
rather than exhibited in the pulpit. It has been a matter of
surprise to some, perhaps almost of regret, that such instances of depravity should have been left on record. But shall
we dispute in this matter either the wisdom, goodness, or
purity of God? Are not important ends to be answered in
the moral government of God, and in the religious history
of man? A profligate woman is at once the most odious,
mischievous, and hateful member of the community. Is it




68           YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
Coming forward to the New Testament, we meet
with Herodias, exhibiting the malignant and renot every way proper, and even desirable, that such a
character should be held up to detestation and scorn, as a
warning to her sex, and that God should thus set a brand
upon her with his own hand, and bear his indignant testimony against her vices? The examples of this kind are
all for warning, to show in a concrete form the excessive
odiousness of female depravity. This is done in a manner
the least likely to do harm, and the most likely to do good.
The descriptions of female turpitude in the Word of God
contain nothing to inflame the imagination or to stimulate
the passions; nothing to make vice seductive by a halfconcealment of its odiousness; nothing to beat down the
guards of virtue, by interesting or amiable associations of
character with sin, or by sophistical and insidious excuses
or defenses. The vice is left in all its naked and revolting
deformity-all its nauseating loathsomeness-to inspire
disgust, and cause even those of ordinary virtue to recoil
from the ugly and filthy object. How different the case
with many works of fiction, both prosaic and poetic, in
which, though there may be a less particularity of sinful
detail, there is immeasurably more to corrupt the moral
principles, to pollute the heart, and to lead astray the
youthful mind from the paths of virtue. What female
reader of the Word of God can rise from the exercise of
contemplating even the worst characters, and perusing the
most vivid descriptions of the sins of her sex, without a
stronger love of purity and a more deeply rooted hatred of
iniquity. This is the answer we would give to infidels,
who sometimes affect to be prudish, and complain of the
descriptions and examples of female turpitude which are
contained in the sacred volume. The use which every
virtuous woman will make of them is to be inspired with a
greater abhorrence of transgression, and a more holy and
intense desire to bekept frorm the most distant approach to it.
____                                                      I




WOMAN'S PLACE IN SCRIPTURE.       59
vengeful passions of a shameless woman, against
the servant of God, who had dared to reprove her
paramour, and impelling Herod, against the protest
of his judgment, heart, and conscience, to put John
the Baptist to death, and thus involve them both in
murder.-Matt. xiv. 11. And here also we read
of the Jewish women that encouraged and stimulated to violence the mob that persecuted Paul
and Barnabas.-Acts xiii. 50, 51; and "That woman Jezebel, who called herself a prophetess, and
taught and seduced God's servants to commit fornication, and to eat things sacrificed to idols."Rev. ii. 20.
In such instances as these, female pride, wherever
it exists, may find some check to its exercise, and
some motives for humiliation. To those who are
prone to think of their sex more highly than they
ought, we present these examples of female frailty,
which the pen of inspiration has drawn upon the
page of Scripture. While to those of the other
sex, if there are any, who are apt to glory over
their fallen sisters, we would, after reminding them
that some of these instances are the result of their
own seductions, present the brighter side of the
picture, and would also call upon woman to contemplate the beautiful specimens of female excellence with which the firmament of Scripture is
studded, like so many stars of various magnitudes.
There is Sarah, who, notwithstanding her many
failings, was unquestionably a good and even a
great woman. In her case, as in many others, her
___________________________ —__________  ________________________________  I




60         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
beauty had become her snare, and if not dangerous
to her own virtue, had placed the life of her husband in peril. She is presented by the apostle
Peter as one of the holy women of old, who were
patterns of domestic virtue and piety. TIer defects,
which consisted of a weakness of faith, that led to
some strange domestic arrangements that brought
their own punishment, were still surrounded with
the brightness of many excellences, in which, if
they were not entirely lost, they were at any rate
diminished. She was a pattern of conjugal fidelity
and sweet simplicity, and just matronly jealousy
toward the stranger who had been brought for a
while so unwisely into her place. Her faith in
God's promise was strong, though shaken for a
moment by the improbabilities of the promised
blessing.-Gen. xii.; xxiii.
Rebekah's earlier and latter life presents to us a
somewhat painful contrast.  None can read the
beautiful account of the mission of Abraham's servant to her father, without admiration at the good
qualities of the damsel who is the heroine of the
story-her industrious and domesticated habitsher unaffected and artless simplicity-her genuine,
yet not silly modesty-her graceful courtesy-her
humane consideration of the comfort of the brute
creation. What a bright pattern is here for the
imitation of young people! But, oh! her unbelieving, injudicious, and sinful contrivances to bring
about the bestowment of the Divine blessing upon
the heir of promise, by that wicked imposition prac_ _ _     _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _   I




WOMAN S PLACE IN SCRIPTURE.      61
ticed upon her aged and blind husband. Mothers,
read it, and learn to guard against sinful contrivances to get good for your children. However,
Rebekah was a good, though a mistaken woman.Gen. xxiv.; xxvii.
In Miriam, the watchful sentinel of the ark upon
the waters of the Nile which contained the infant
Moses, we see first the dutiful daughter and anxious
sister, and, in after life, the coadjutor of her illustrious brother, leading the chorus of women by her
timbrel and her. voice, in the triumphal song of
Moses, on the borders of the Red Sea: Exod. ii.
xv.; afterward, in conjunction with Aaron, his opponent through envy; but we may hope restored
to her better and earlier mind, through the chastisement she received fiom the Lord.-Numbers
xii. How much mischief may envy do to spoil the
best of characters, and to poison the happiness of
families.
In Deborah, we contemplate the religious heroine, and the inspired poetess, raised up by the special Providence of God, for the deliverance of his
people; an instance of exalted piety in an age of
depressed religion, and still deeper national distress.-Judges iv.
Should it be asked by any one, what we are to
say of Jael, celebrated by the poetess Deborah, in
her lofty strain of praise, I scarcely know what
answer to give. Nothing less than a Divine mandate, which she may have received in some unknown
and unrecorded manner, could have justified the
6




62          YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
deed. Apart from this, even the stratagems of war
would not clear the heroine from the charge of
treachery of the blackest kind. True, Sisera was an
enemy, but he had trusted himself to her protection,
and she slew him while sleeping under her guardianship. I leave the matter therefore as I find it,
without either justifying or condemning, for I know
not all the facts of the case.
What a pattern of filial obedience, piety, and
patriotism, have we in Jephthah's daughter, over
whose affecting story hangs so deep a mystery!
Whether, according to the opinions of some, she
was actually offered up in sacrifice, or, according
to others, only consecrated by perpetual virginity
to God, her own beautiful character shines out with
equal brightness, in all that is amiable, dutiful, and
submissive.
But now turn to that touching and melancholy
group of widows in the land of Moab-Naomi, Ruth,
and Orpah. What pen but that which has done it,
and done it with such inimitable simplicity, could
do justice to that sweet and pathetic story. Rarely
in the history of families does such a scene of affliction as this occur-a widowed mother, and the
widows of her two sons! A sad proof how precarious are all the scenes of dear domestic bliss we
fondly call o-'r own. How tender, how dignified,
and how thoughtful is the conduct of Naomi.
What nobleness of resolution, what daughter-like
attachment, and what piety do we see in Ruth;
Pnd if in her after-conduct there was that which




WOMAN'S PLACE IN SCRIPTURE.      63
would not suit the meridian of our age and country,
there was nothing contrary to the strictest purity
of intention, or modesty of conduct, if we take into
account the circumstances of her time, and the provisions of the Jewish law under which she then
lived.  The whole narrative presents a beautiful
episode in Jewish history, and an attractive specimen of the simplicity of early manners.
Can we fail to sympathize with Hannah in her
sorrows, her insults, and her joys, or to admire her
zeal for the Lord, in devoting her child of promise
to his service'?-1 Samuel i. What a pattern for
parents, in being willing to give up their sons for
ministers and missionaries! Abigail furnishes us
with a striking example of the singular prudence of
a woman who was unhappily associated with a
drunkard and a churl, and of her diligence and her
tact in averting from her family the evils impending over it from her husband's vices.-1 Samuel
xxv. 1-3.
What an instance of respect, gratitude, and affection, for the ministers of religion-of female influence, rightly exerted over the mind of her husband
in the cause of religion-and of submission to the
will of God; is the Shunamite.-2 Kings iv. Whq
can read that touching account of the death of her
only son, and her own collected, composed, and
energetic conduct on the occasion, without deep
feeling and high admiration? We find no overwhelming or distracting grief, which prevented her
from adopting the best, the only means for obtain.




64         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
ing relief, but a faith which sustained her courage,
and directed all her actions. Multitudes in every
age and country where the story has gone, have
been instructed by her language, and stimulated by
her example; and amid the deepest sorrows, have
echoed her few noble monosyllables in reply to the
question, "Is it well with thee? With thy husband? With thy child? And she answered and
said,' IT IS WELL.'"
And then what a pattern of fidelity, and piety,
and kindness, do we find for female servants in the
very next chapteri to this, in that simple and beautiful story of the little Hebrew captive girl, who
was nurse-maid in Naaman's family.   All, and
especially they who occupy a similar situation, may
learn, by what weak and humble instruments God
may accomplish the purposes of his mind, and
work out the schemes of his providence. To how
many a charity sermon in these remote days,
has that incident furnished a text; and thus the
little Jewish slave not only brought healing to
her master, and a knowledge of the true God into
Syria, but became a pattern to myriads of children
in our own country.
Nor less to be admired, are the generosity and
faith of the widow of Sarepta, whose barrel of meal
and cruse of oil stand out in such relief, as among
the brightest pictures of Old Testament history.
In what a coruscation of glory does the name of
Esther blaze forth upon us, for conjugal fidelity,
piety uncorrupted by prosperity, and queenly in



WOMAN'S PLACE IN SChIPTURE.         65
fluence consecrated to the cause of true religion!
Now open the page of the New Testament. Is
Christianity destitute of female worthies-women
of holy renown 2 It would be very strange if it
were. Strange, indeed, if his religion, who, though
he was the Son of God, was born of woman, did not
raise up many who should shine forth in all the
mild and heavenly radiance of female piety.
Though, as I have said in the last sermon, we
ascribe no Divine honors, and offer no idolatrous
homage to the Virgin Mary, nor set her forth in the
beauties of painting and sculpture; nor call her,
with a singular mixture of absurdity and blasphemy,
the MOTHER OF GOD-we revere her as blessed and
exalted among women, to give birth to the humanity of Christ, the Saviour of the world; and ascribe
to her every holy and general excellence as a
woman, a wife, a mother, and a saint.* We cher* In an age when Popery is lifting up its head in triumph
and with hope, no fair opportunity should be lost to expose
its pretensions and refute its errors. There is no part of
this dreadful system more contrary to Scripture, or more
insulting to God, than its Mariolatry, or worship of the
Virgin Mary. She is styled " Mother of God;" " Queen
of Seraphim, Saints, and Prophets;" "Advocate of Sinners;" "Refuge of Sinners;" " Gate of Heaven;" " Queen
of Heaven." And as the same titles are ascribed to her,
or nearly so, as are ascribed to Christ; so is the same
worship paid to her as to the Saviour. Churches are built
to her honor; her shrines are crowded with devotees, enriched with their gifts, and adorned with their votive offerings. Prayers are offered to her-her praises are chanted
6*




66           YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
ish also a high veneration for Elizabeth her cousin,
the wife of Zacharias, and the mother of John the
Baptist.-Luke i.    In the piety of old Anna-Luke
ii. 36-we see a bright pattern for aged widows in
her believing, waiting posture, for the consolation
of Israel, and an example for an aged saint, ready
for the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ: the zeal,
in hymns, and blessings are offered to and asked from her,
as one who has power to bestow them. Five annual festivals celebrate her greatness, and keep alive the devotions
of her worshipers  So that Papists almost jostle out the
devotion due to Almighty God and our blessed Saviour by
their idolatry of her. Now, where, we ask, is one single
example, command, or even hint, for all this in the Word
of God? Is it any wonder the Scriptures are kept from
the people, when the most common understanding could
see that nothing of all this is to be found in that volume?
The Acts of the Apostles make mention of her name but
once, and that without any mark of eulogy; and in the
Epistles she is not mentioned at all. Yea, how contrary is
all this to the declaration that there is only one Mediator
between God and Man-the Man Christ Jesus.     "This
doctrine of the worship due to the Virgin," says Wylie, in
his admirable work on the Papacy, "has been exhibited in
symbol, and that in so grotesque a way, that for a moment
we forget its blasphemy. In the dream of St. Bernardwhich forms the subject of an altar-piece at Milan-two
ladders were seen reaching from earth to heaven. At the
top of one of the ladders stood Christ, and at the top of the
other stood Mary. Of those who attempted to enter heaven
by the ladder of Christ, not one succeeded-all fell back.
Of those who ascended by the ladder of Mary, not one failed.
The virgin, prompt to succor, stretched out her hand; and
thus aided, the aspirants ascended with ease."-SEYMOUR'S
7Mornings among the Jesuits.




WOMAN S PLACE IN SCRIPTURE.      67
so worthy to be imitated by every reclaimed sinner, of the woman of Samaria, after she had believed in Christ, for his honor and the conversion
of her countrymen-John iv.: the melting penitence of the woman who had been a sinner, whose
history teaches us that the most abandoned persons
may be reclaimed, and find mercy, and that penitence, gratitude, and love must be in proportion to
the guilt contracted and forgiven-Lukeqvii. 36-50:
the strong and invincible faith of the Syrophenician woman which received such a tribute of admiration from Christ, and whose narrative will teach
the latest generations of mankind the power of importunate, persevering, and believing prayer-Matt.
xv. 23: the generosity of the poor widow who cast
in her mites, the whole of her substance, into the
treasury of the temple-Mark xii. 42: the beautiful account of the two sisters, Martha and Mary,
and the discrimination of the characters of the careful and troubled housewife, and the anxious inquirer
after salvation-Luke x. 38-42: the pouring out
of the box of spikenard by one that loved Christ so
as to give her costliest offerings to his person-John
xii. 3: the grateful, devoted attention, and ministrations of Mary Magdalene and the other Mary to
Christ-John xix. 25; xx. 1: what an array of
female excellence is here!
Passing on to the Acts of the Apostles, what delightful mention is made of Dorcas, full of good works
and alms deeds which she did, as evinced by her
coats and garments for the poor, and the tears which
_________________________________-J~~~~~~~~




068        YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
were produced by her death, and which embalmed
her memory-Acts ix. 36-41: and of Lydia, who
resorted to the place of prayer at Philippi, whose
heart the Lord had opened to attend to the things
spoken by Paul, and who afforded the rights of hos.
pitality to the apostle and his companion-Acts
xvi.: and of the chief women, not a few, at Thessalonica, who believed in the apostle's doctrine concerning Christ-Acts xvii. 4. Nor are the Epistles
barren of female names deserving ever to be held
in remembrance for their piety, zeal, and good
works. There we find Phebe, the deaconness and
bearer to Rome of the epistle to the church in that
city-Rom. xvi. 1: and Euodia, and Syntyche;
Lois and Eunice, the mother and grandmother of
Timothy, renowned for the unfeigned faith which
dwelt in them-2 Tim. i. 5: and those women also
that labored with Paul in the gospel-Phil. iv. 2.
And what shall we say more of Priscilla, Paul's
helper in Christ, and the instructress of the eloquent
Apollos; and Mary, "who bestowed much labor
upon him;" and Tryphena, and Tryphona, and
Julia, "who labored in the Lord?"-Rom. xvi.
No, my female friends, you see, we repeat, the
Scriptures of truth have not passed over your sex
in silence, nor thrust it into a corner, nor thrown it
into a shadow. On the contrary, the sacred page is
rich and luminous, with bright and beautiful examples of female excellence. You stand there, side
by side, with man in the practice of piety, and are
exhibited as not a whit behind him in all that apper




WOMAN S PLACE IN SCRIPTURE.      69
tains to the glory of humanity. In the Bible, we
have now proved that woman is seen in every gradation of rank, fiom the queen upon the throne to
the menial grinding at the mill; in every variety
of condition-the maid, the wife, the mother, and
the mistress; in every circumstance of grief and
joy-the happy bride, the mourning widow; in
every phase of moral character-the faithful spouse,
and the shameless adulteress; in every scene of
active duty, whether in the family, the church, or
the world; in every changeful aspect of fortunerolling in affluence, or pining in want; there she is
seen enlivening the sacred page with her narrative
-adorning it with her beauty; sometimes darkening it with her crimes, at others, brightening it with
her virtues; now calling us to weep with her in her
sorrows, then to rejoice with her in her joys. In
short, woman is everywhere to be found wrought
into the details of God's Scriptures, a beacon to
warn us, or a rule to guide us. And, as written
by the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, it is to be
considered as his testimony to the excellence and
importance of your sex, and the influence it is intended and destined to exert upon the welfare of
mankind. Had the Bible-I will not say been
against you-but had it passed you over in silence,
or only referred to you incidentally, or looked at
you with sidelong glances, you would have sunk in
general estimation; and man's neglect of you would
have been defended or excused by that of God him.
self. But now, no one can plead the example of




70         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
the Bible for any attempt to neglect, despise, or oppress you. While it protects woman from the insults, the injuries, and the oppression of the other
sex, it protects her with no less care and benefit
from the sad effects which would arise from an assumption of prerogatives which do not belong to
her, and from those excuses of ambition to which
her own vanity might otherwise prompt her. It
guards- her dignity from being trampled down by
others, and equally prevents her from lowering it
herself, by pretensions which would only make her
ridiculous. It describes, with accuracy, the circle
within which it is the will of Providence she should
move; presents to her the mission which she is
sent into the world to filfill; furnishes her the rules
by which she is to act; proposes to her the rewards which she may legitimately seek and surely
expect, if she be faithful to herself; and offers her
the assistance necessary for the fulfillment of her
high and holy vocation. What this is, will be the
subject of our next sermon.
In the meanwhile, let me exhort you not only to
study the Scriptures, but to study them-next to
your desire.to learn the way of salvation through
faith in Christ Jesus-to form your own character
as women, by its precepts and its examples. Many
and precious are the volumes that have been written for your benefit by your own sex. Female
pens have been most happily and usefully employed in delineating female excellence; the productions of which you would do well to read. But,
I__________




WOMAN S PLACE IN SCRIPTURE.          71
after all, there is no guide for the formation of
female character, morally or religiously considered,
like the inspired one.    A  woman unacquainted
with the Bible, and ignorant of its contents, as
affecting her own conduct, character, and history,
has yet to know the finest patterns of efemale loveliness. The Bible is the best mirror by which most
accurately to know what you are, and to become
what you should be; before whose reflecting sur
face you may adjust all the moral habiliments of
the soul, and from which you may go forth adorned
with all the beauties of holiness, clothed with the
garment of purity, and decorated with the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit."
* The author is indebted for some things in this sermon
and the next to an incomparably beautiful little work by
Adolphe Monod, formerly Professor of Theology at Montauban, but now Minister of the French Reformed Church
in Paris. A preacher so celebrated, that when'Lacordaire,
the most renowned of Roman Catholic public orators, was
complimented upon being the first French preacher in
France, he replied, "No: I am only the second-Adolphe
Monod is first." A very elegant little work has lately been
published by the Rev. John Jessop, M.A., entitled, "Woman," for which the author candidly acknowledges himself
indebted chiefly to " a late highly esteemed French Protestant clergyman." Mr. J. does not seem to be aware that
happily MIr. Monod is still living. His exquisitely beautiful little work has been admirably translated by Miss
Lloyd; and is of such excellence, that it can not be spoken
of in terms of eulogy which are too high and emphatic.
____________________)________________ __________________________________ 




wnman'o 3Kt33aini.
"And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man
should be alone; I will make him an helpmeet for
him."-G-ENESIS ii. 18.
"WHAT, in this great, and diversified, and busy
world, is MY place, and MY business?" is a question
which every one should ask. For every one has a
place to fill and a part to act. And to act his part
well, according to the will of God, in the lofty
drama of human life, should be the ambition, the
solicitude, and the prayer of each of us. It is the
first lesson of wisdom, to know our place; the
second, to keep it. And of course, corresponding
with this, to ascertain the duties of our place, and
to discharge them. There are class duties as well
as individual ones, and the latter are generally to
be more accurately learned by an intelligent appre
hension of the former. Woman, as such, has her
mission. What is it? What is precisely that
rank she is to occupy-that purpose she is to fulfill,
above which she would be unduly exalted, and below which she would be as unjustly degraded?
This is a subject which should be thoroughly understood, in order that she should know what to
claim, and man what to concede-that she may




WOMAN'S MISSION.            73
know what she has to do, and he what he has a
right to expect.
We shall endeavor to answer this question, and
point out the nature of woman's mission. In doing
this, we shall consult the infallible oracle of Scripture, and not the speculations of moralists, economists, and philosophers. We hold this to be our
rule in the matter before us. God is the creator
of both sexes-the constructor of society-the
author of social relations, and the arbiter of social
duties, claims, and immunities. And this is admitted by all who believe in the authority of the
Bible. You are content, my female friends, to
abide by the decisions of this oracle. You have
every reason to be so. He that created you is best
qualified to declare the intention of his own acts,
and you may safely, as you should humbly, allow
him to fix your position, and make known your
duties. In common with man, woman has a heavenly calling to glorify God as the end of her existence; to perform all the duties, and enjoy all the
blessings, of a religious life; like him, she is a sinful, rational, and immortal creature, placed under
an economy of mercy, and called, by repentance
toward God and faith in our Lord Jesus Christ, to
eternal life. Religion is as much her vocationas
that of the other sex. In Christ Jesus there is
neither male nor female, but all are on a level as to
obligations, duties, and privileges.
In common with man, she is called, where she is
unmarried and dependent, to labor for her own sup7




74         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
port; a condition to which large portions of the
community are necessarily subject by the circumstances of their birth. Industry is as incumbent
upon her as upon the other sex, and indolence is
no more excusable. But in the married state, her
sphere of labor, as we shall presently show, is the
family; and it belongs to the husband to earn by
the sweat of his brow, not only his own bread, but
that of the household. In many of the uncivilized
tribes, where the ameliorating condition of Christianity is not felt, the woman is the drudge of the
family, while the husband lives' in lordly sloth.
And even in this country, at least in its manufacturing portions, manual labor falls too often, and
too heavily, upon married women, greatly to the
detriment of their families. An unmarried woman,
however, without fortune, must provide for herself
in some way or other, according to the circumstances of her birth and situation; and let her not
consider herself degraded by it. Honest industry
is far more honorable than pride and sloth.
But neither of these is the peculiar mission of
woman, as appertaining to her sex. To know what
this is, we must, as I have said, consult the page of
revelation, and ascertain the declared motive of
God for her creation. "And the Lord God said,
It is not good that the man should be alone; I will
make him AN HELPMEET FOR HIM."  This is further
expressed, or rather repeated, where it is said,
"And Adam,': or, "Although Adam, had given
names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and
1     ______ ___   __.,,_...__~._____~




WOMAN'S MISSION.           75
to every beast of the field; yet for Adam there
was not found AN HELPMEET FOR HIM"-Genesis
ii. 18, 20. Nothing can be more clear from hence,
than that woman was made for man. Adam was
created a being with undeveloped social propensities, which, indeed, seem essential to all creatures.
It is the sublime peculiarity of Deity to be entirely
independent for happiness of all other beings. He,
and he only, is the theater of his own glory, the
fountain of his own felicity, a sufficient object of his
own contemplation, and needing nothing for his
bliss but self-communion. The highest archangel
in heaven would pine, even there, for companionship, either divine or angelic. Adam, surrounded
with all the glories of Paradise, and with all the
various tribes it contained, found himself alone, and
needed companionship, without which his life was
but a solitude, Eden itself a desert. Endowed
with a nature too communicative to be satisfied
with himself alone, he sighed for society, for support, for some complement to his existence, and
only half-lived so long as he lived alone. Formed
to think, to speak, to love, his thoughts yearned for
other thoughts with which to compare and exercise
his soaring aspirations. His words were wearisomely wasted upon the wanton air, or at best
awoke but an echo which mocked instead of answered him. His love, as regards an earthly object,
knew not where to bestow itself; and returning to
his own bosom, threatened to degenerate into a desolating egotism. His entire being longed, in short,




76         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
for another self-but that other self did not exist'
there was no helpmeet for him. The visible creatures
which surrounded him, were too much beneath him:
the invisible Being who gave him life, was too much
above him, to permit him to unite their condition
with his-own. Whereupon God made the woman,
and the great problem was immediately solved.
It was, then, the characteristic of unfallen man to
want some one to sympathize with him in his joys,
as it is of fallen man to want some one to sympathize with him in his sorrows. Whether Adam
was so far conscious of. his wants as to ask for a
companion, we are not informed. It would appear
from the inspired record, as if the design of this
precious boon originated with God; and as if Eve,
like so many of his other mercies, was the spon-'taneous bestowment of his own free-will. Thus
Adam would have to say, as did one of his most
illustrious descendants many ages afterward, "Thou
preventest" (anticipatest) "me with thy goodness."
Here, then, is the design of God in creating woman,
to be a suitable helpmate to man. Man needed a
companion, and God gave him woman. And as
there was no other man than Adam at the time in
existence, Eve was designed exclusively for Adam's
comfort; thus, teaching us from the beginning,
that whatever mission woman may have to accomplish in reference to man, in a generic sense, her
mission, at least in wedded life, is to be a suitable
helpmate for that one man to whom she is united.
It was declared from the beginning, that every other
Lo...._




WOMAN'S MISSION.           77
tie, though not cut by marriage, shall be rendered
subordinate, and a man shall " leave his father and
mother and cleave unto his wife, and they two shall
be one flesh." If then, woman's mission in Para.
dise was to be man's companion and joy, it must
be the case still.  Her vocation has not been
changed by the fall. By that catastrophe, man
needs still more urgently a companion, and God
has rendered this, her mission, still more explicit
by the declaration, " Thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee." It has been
often shewn that by being taken from himself, she
was equal to man in nature; while the very part
of the body from which she was abstracted indicated
the position she was intended to occupy. She was
not taken from the head, to show she was not to
rule over him; nor from his foot, to teach that she
was not to be his slave; nor from his hand, to show
that she was not to be his tool: but from his side, to
show that she was to be his companion. There may
perhaps be more of ingenuity and fancy in this, than
of God's original design, but if a mere conceit, it is
at once both pardonable and instructive.
That woman was intended to occupy a position
of subordination and dependence is clear enough
from every part of the Word of God. This is declared in language already quoted: "Thy desire
shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over
thee." This referred not only to Eve personally,
but to Eve representatively. It was the divine law
of the relation of the sexes, then promulgated for
7*




78          YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
all time. The preceding language has placed her,
as a punishment for her sin, in a state of sorrow;
this places her in a state of subjection. Her husband was to be the center of her earthly desires,
and, to a certain extent, the regulator of them also;
and she was to be in subjection to him. What
was enacted in paradise has been confirmed by
every subsequent dispensation of grace. Judaism
is full of it in all its provisions; and Christianity
equally establishes it.
I shall here introduce and explain the words of
the apostle, "I would have you to know that the
head of every man is Christ, and the head of the
woman is the man." He then goes on to direct
that women should not appear and exercise those
miraculous gifts which were sometimes bestowed
upon them, unvailed and with their hair cut off.
He adds, " A man indeed ought not to oover his
head, forasmuch as he is the image and glory of
God; but the woman is the glory of the man. For
the man is not of the woman; but the woman of
the man. Neither was the man created for the
woman; but the woman for the man"-1 Cor. xi.
3-9. For the explanation of this passage, I remark, that in the times of the apostle there were
two recognized characteristic emblems of the female sex, when they appeared in public-vails, and
the preservation of their tresses. It would seem
-from the apostle's remarks, as if some of the female members of the Corinthian Church, during
the time that the inspiration of the Holy Spirit was
I________________,J~



WOMAN'S MISSION.            79
upon them, cast off their vails, after the manner of
the heathen priestesses when they delivered the
responses of the oracles. This conduct the apostle
reproves, and informs them that if the vail were
thrown aside they might as-well also cut off their
flowing hair, which is one of woman's distinctions
from man, and by all nations considered the ornament as well as the peculiarity of the sex.. We
may pause for a moment to observe how constantly and completely Christianity is the parent
of order and the enemy of indecorum of every kind.
But why were not the women to lay aside their
vails  Because it would be forgetting their subordination and dependence, and assuming an equal
rank with man. This is the gist of the apostle's
reason. It was not merely indecorous and contrary
to modesty, but it was ambitious, and violating the
order of heaven. The other expressions of the apostle in this passage are very strong. As Christ is
the head or ruler of man, so man is the head and
ruler of woman in the domestic economy. Man
was made to show forth God's glory and praise; to
be in subordination to him, and only to him; while
woman was created to be, in addition to this, the
glory of man, by being in subordination to him, as
his help, his ornament, and his glory. She was
not only made out of him, but for him. All her
loveliness, comeliness, and purity are not only the
expressions of her excellence, but of his honor and
dignity, since all were not only derived from him
but made for him.




80          YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
Here, then, is woman's true position, and if any
thing more need be said to prove it from the
records of Christianity, we may refer to other apostolic language, in which wives are enjoined to be
subject to their husbands in all things, even as the
church is subject to Christ-Ephes. v. Nor is the
apostle Paul alone in this, for Peter writes in the
same strain-1 Epistle iii. 1.  Let woman then
bow to this authority, nor feel herself degraded by
such submission. It has been said that in domestic
life man shines as the sun, but woman as the moon,
with a splendor borrowed from the man. May it
not be said with greater truth and propriety, and
to render the comparison less invidious, man shines
as the primary planet, reflecting the glory of God,
who is the orb of the moral universe; and woman
shines as the satellite of man, deriving her splendor
from. the same source, and while equally obeying
the law of the central luminary, is created for the
primary dependent body, revolves in its attraction,
follows in its course, and ministers to its comfort.
Behold, then, we say again, woman's position
and mission; it is summed up in two words —IuMILITY and LOVE. Of love and subjection to her
husband. Every thing, connected with the relation
ship of man and woman has, however, since the
fall, a more serious character; her love has become
more anxious; her humility more profound. Bash
ful of her own defects, and anxious to reinstate
nerself in her husband's heart, woman lives to re
pair the wrong she has inflicted on man, and lav




WOMAN'S MISSION.            81
ishes upon him consolations which may sweeten
the present bitterness of sin, and warnings which
may preserve from the future bitterness of hell.
Woman, then, whatever relation she may bear to
society at large, whatever duties, in consequence of
this relation, she may have to discharge, and whatever benefits, by the right discharge of these duties,
she may have it in her power to confer upon the
community, must consider herself as called to advance the comfort of man in his private relations,
by promoting his peace to promote her own, and
to receive from him all that respect, protection,
and ever assiduous affection to which her equal
nature, her companionship, and her devotedness
give her so just a claim. She is, in wedded life, to
be his constant companion, in whose society he is
to find one who meets him  hand to hand, eye to
eye, lip to lip, and heart to heart; to whom he can
unburthen the secrets of a heart pressed down with
care, or wrung with anguish; whose presence shall
be to him instead of all society; whose voice shall
be his sweetest music; and her smiles his brightest
sunshine. From whom he goes forth with regret,
and to whose converse he returns with willing feet
when the toils of the day are over; who walks
near his loving heart, and feels the throbbing of
affection as her arm leans on his, and presses on
his side. In his hours of retired converse he tells
her all the secrets of his heart; finds in her all the
capabilities and all the promptings of the most tender and endeared felowship; and in her gentle




82          YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
smiles, and honied words, and unrestrained speech,
enjoys all he expected in one who was given to be
his associate and friend.
In that companionship which woman was designed to afford to man, must of course be included
the sympathetic offices of the comforter. It is hers
in their hours of retirement to console and cheer
him; when he is injured or insulted, to mollify the
wounds of his troubled spirit; when burdened by
care, to lighten, by sharing the load; when groaning with anguish, to calm by her peace-speaking
words the tumult of his heart; and act, through all
his sorrows, the part of a ministering angel.
Nor will she be backward to offer, nor he backward to receive the counsels of wisdom which her
prudence will suggest, even though she may not be
supposed to be intimately acquainted with all the
entanglements of this world's business. Woman's
advice, had it been asked and acted upon, would
have saved thousands of men from bankruptcy and
ruin. Few men have ever had to regret their taking counsel from a prudent wife; while multitudes
have had to reproach themselves for their folly in
not asking, and multitudes more for not following
the counsels of such a companion.
If, then, this is woman's mission, according to the
representation of her Almighty Creator-to be the
suitable helpmate of that man to whom she has
given up herself to be the companion of his pil
grimage upon earth-it of course supposes that
marriage, contracted with a due regard to prudence,
ZD 




WOMAN'S MISSION.            83
and under all proper regulations, is the natural
state of both man and woman. And so, we affirm
in truth, it is. Providence has willed it, and nature
prompts it. But as the exceptions are so numerous, is there no mission for those to whom the exception appertains? Is it married women only
that have a mission, and an important one? Certainly not. In these cases we fall back upon woman's mission to society at large. And is not this
momentous?    Has it not been admitted in all
ages, and by all countries, that the influence of female character upon social virtue and happiness,
and upon national strength and prosperity, whether
for good or for evil, is prodigious? Is not the
declaration with which Adolphe Monod opens his
beautiful treatise perfectly true? "The greatest
influence on earth, whether for good or for evil, is
possessed by woman. Let us study the history of
by-gone ages-the state of barbarism and civilization; of the East and the West; of Paganism and
Christianity; of antiquity and the middle ages; of
the medieval and modern times-and we shall find
that there is nothing which more decidedly separates them than the condition of woman."  Every
woman, whether rich or poor, married or single,
has a circle of influence, within which, according to
her character, she is exerting a certain amount of
power for good or harm. Every woman, by her
virtue or her vice, by her folly or her wisdom, by
her levity or her dignity, is adding something to
our national elevation or degradation. As long as




S4          YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
female virtue is prevalent, upheld by one sex and
respected by the other, a nation can not sink very
low in the scale of ignominy by plunging into the
depths of vice. To a certain extent, woman is the
conservator of a nation's welfare. Her virtue, if
ilrm and uncorrupted, will stand sentinel over that
of empire. Law, and justice, and liberty, and the
arts, all contribute, of course, to the well-being of a
nation; beneficial influence flows in from various
springs; and innumerable contributors may be at
work, each laboring in his vocation for his country's
weal, but let the general tone of female morals be
low, and all will be rendered nugatory. While the
universal prevalence of womanly intelligence and
virtue will swell the stream of civilization to its
highest level, impregnate it with its richest qualities, and spread its fertility over the widest surface.
A community is not likely to be overthrown where
woman fulfills her mission; or by the power of her
noble heart over the hearts of others, she will raise
it fiom its ruins, and restore it again to prosperity
and joy. Here, then, beyond the circle of wedded
life, as well as that which is found within it, is, no
doubt, a part of woman's mission, and an important
one it is. Her field is social life; her object is
social happiness; her reward is social gratitude and
respect.
If we are right as to the nature of woman'mission, we can not err as to the proper sphere of
it. If she was created for man; and not only for
the race of man, but for one man, then the easy and
i ~   ~     _.     _ _.. _  _ _ __  _____




WOMAN'S MISSION.            85
necessary inference is, that HOME is the proper scene
of woman's action and influence. There are few
terms in the language around which cluster so many
blissful associations as that delight of every En.
glish heart, the word HOME. The elysium of love,
the nursery of virtue, the garden of enjoyment, the
temple of concord, the circle of all tender relationships, the play-ground of childhood, the dwelling
of manhood, the retreat of age; where health loves
to enjoy its pleasures; wealth to revel in its luxuries; poverty to bear its rigors; sickness to endure
its pains; and dissolving nature to expire; which
throws its spell over those who are within its
charmed circle, and even sends its attractions across
oceans and continents, drawing to itself the thoughts
and wishes of the man that wanders from it at the
antipodes: this-home-sweethome-is the sphere
of wedded woman's mission. Was it not so at
first, when PARADISE was woman's home?  True,
there was no other scene for her to appear and act
in; but this seemed to teach us at once what was
to be her first and chief circle of movement forever
after. Is it any hardship upon woman-any depreciation of her importance, to place her there, as
her sphere of action and influence? Is it to assign
her a circle of influence unworthy of, or beneath
herself, to call her to preside over that little community, of which home is the seat? Sha 1 we estimate the importance of such a scene of action?
Shall we tell of the varied and momentous interests
which are included in that circle? Shall we speak
8




~86      YOUNG WOMAN' S FRIEND.
of the happiness of a husband, whose bliss, to so
considerable an extent, is created by herself, and
involves her own? Or the character and future
well-being, for both worlds, of a family, if there be
one? Or the comfort of servants, and the order
and pleasant working of the whole domestic constitution, all of which depends so much upon her?
Why, to make one such home a seat of holiness
and happiness; to fill one such sphere with an influence so sweet and sacred; to throw the fascination of connubial feeling and of maternal influence
over one such community; to irradiate so many
countenances with delight; to fill so many hearts
with content, and to prepare so many characters for
their future part in life; such an object would be
deemed, by an angel, worth an incarnation upon
earth.
Or, leaving this scene of her duties, shall we look
out and abroad upon the public good-the strength
and stability of the nation? For who knows not
that the springs of an empire's prosperity lie in the
domestic constitution, and in well-trained families2?
Even one such family is a contribution to the majestic flow of a nation's greatness. Can such families exist without woman's care, and oversight,
and wisdom? Has it not grown into a proverb,
that home has ever been the nursery of great men,
and moth nrs their instructresses?  It may be said,
as a general principle, that woman is not only the
mother of the body, but of the character of her
children. To her is first intrusted the instruction




WOMAN'S MISSION.            87
of the mind, the cultivation of the heart, the form.
ation of the life. Thought, feeling, will, imagination, virtue, religion, or the contrary moral tendenties, all germinate under her fostering influence,
which also continues to direct their growth. The
greatest power in the moral world is that which a
mother exercises over her young child. The decisive moment in education is the starting-point.
The dominant direction which is to determine the
whole course of life, lies concealed in the first years
of infancy; and these belong to the mother.
One of the most hallowed, and lovely, and beautiful sights in our world is, woman at home; discharging with all the meekness of wisdom, the various duties of wife, mother, and mistress, with an
order that nothing is allowed to disturb; a patience
which nothing can exhaust; an affection which is
never ruffled; and a perseverance that no difficulties can interrupt, nor any disappointments arrest: in short, such a scene as that described by
Solomon, in the most exquisite chapter of his
Proverbs. Eve, in Paradise, in all her untainted
loveliness, by the side of Adam, propping the lily,
training the vine, or directing the growth of the
rose; shedding such smiles upon him, and receiving them reflected back from his noble countenance
upon her happy spirit, as told in mute language,
their perfect and conjoint bliss, was, no doubt, q
brighter image of perfect virtue and undisturbed
felicity; but to me, the sight of a woman in our
fallen world, filling up by her piety, intelligence,




88         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
and all matronly and motherly excellences, the cir
cle of a home made happy chiefly by her influence
is a scene little inferior in beauty, and even supe
rior in difficulty, to that of our first mother in Paradise. And it is poetry, and not reason and moral
taste, that can revel in imagination upon the beau.
ties of the former, and see little to excite our warm
est admiration in the latter.
But it will be asked, perhaps, if we would shut
up every married woman within the domestic circle, and confine her with the jealousy and authority
of an Oriental despot to her own home; or if we
would condemn and degrade her to mere household
drudgery. We have, we think, protected ourselves
already fiom this imputation, by representing her
as the companion, counselor, and comforter of
man, Oh, no! she shall, with our consent, never
sink down from the side of man, to be trampled
under his foot. She shall not have one ray of her
glory extinguished, nor be deprived of a single
honor that belongs to her sex; but to be the instructress of her children, the companion of her
husband, and the queen consort of the domestic
state, is no such degradation; and she, only, is degraded who thinks so. Still in connection with,
though not in neglect of, this, let her give her influence upon society to the circle of her friends on all
suitable occasions, and in all suitable places,
Though the drawing-room is not the chief sphere
of her influence, it is one of the circles in which she
may move-and albeit incessant parties of pleasure,




WOMAN'S MISSION.            89
and a constant round of entertainments are not her
mission, but stand diametrically opposed to it, and
hinder it-yet as capable of influencing society for
good, she is occasionally to lend that influence,
which every wise and good woman exerts over the
tone of morals and manners, to the friends who
may court her society. Woman is the grace, the
ornament, the charm of the social circle; and when
she carries into it habits that frown upon vice, that
check folly and discountenance levity, she is a benefactress of her country. And as to the various
institutions of our age for the relief of suffering
humanity, the instruction of ignorance, and the
spread of religion, we give her all the room and
liberty for these things which are compatible with
her duties to her own household. What prudent
female would ask more, or what advocate of her
rights would claim more? Woman is always in
her place where charity presides, except when her
time and attention are demanded at home for those
who are more immediately her charge. But we
shall have much more to advance on this subject in
a future discourse.
But what shall we say of those women who claim
on their own behalf, or of their advocates who claim
for them, a participation of the labors, the occupa,
tions, the rights, and the duties, which have usually
been considered as appertaining to the other sex?
There are those who would have the line of demarkation expunged, which nearly all nations have
drawn between the duties and the occupations of




90          YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
men and those of women. Christianity has pro.
vided a place for woman for which she is fitted, and
in which she shines; but take her out of that place,
and her luster pales and sheds a feeble and a sickly
ray. Or, to change the metaphor, woman is a plant,
which in its own green-house seclusion will put
forth all its brilliant colors and all its sweet perfume; but remove it fiom the protection of its own
floral home into the common garden and open field,
where hardier flowers will grow and thrive, its
beauty fades and its odor is diminished. Neither
reason nor Christianity invites woman to the pro.
fessor's chair, nor conducts her to the bar, nor
makes her welcome to the pulpit, nor admits her to
the place of ordinary magistracy. Both exclude
her-not indeed by positive and specific commands,
but by general principles and spirit, from the corruption of the camp, the debates of the senate, and
the pleadings of the forum. And they bid her beware how she overleaps the delicacy of her sex, and
listens to the doctrines of effeminate debaters; or
becomes the dupe of modern reformers or fashionable journalists. They forbid us to hear her gentle
voice in the popular assembly; and do not even
suffer her to speak in the Church of God. They
claim not for her the right of suffrage, nor any immunity by which she may "usurp authority over
the man." And yet the Bible gives her her throne,
for she is the queen of the domestic circle. It is
the heart of her husband. It is the heart of her
family. It is the female supremacy in that inter



WOMAN'S MISSION.            91
esting domain, where love, and tenderness, and refinement, thought and feeling preside. It is the privilege of making her husband happy and honored,
and her sons and daughters the ornaments of human
society. It is the sphere of piety, prudence, diligence, in the domestic station, and a holy and
devout life. It is the sphere that was occupied by
Hannah, the mother of Samuel; by Elizabeth, the
mother of John; by Eunice, the mother of Timothy; and by Mary, the mother of Jesus. It is the
respect and esteem of mankind. It is, as one has
said, that silent, unobserved, unobtrusive influence,
by which she accomplishes more for her race, than
many whose names occupy a broad space on the
page of history. A woman who fills well the
sphere thus assigned to her, as a wife, a mother,
and a mistress; who thus trains up good citizens
for the state, and good fathers and mothers of other
families which are to spring from her own; and, for
aught she can tell, still other families from them,
perhaps in all but an endless succession, need not
complain that her sphere of action and her power
of influence are too limited for female ambition to
aspire to. The mothers of the wise and the good
are the benefactresses of their species.  What
would be gained to woman's comfort, repectability,
or usefulness, or to the welfare of society; but how
much would be lost to each, by withdrawing her
from her own appropriate'sphere, and introducing
her to that for which she has no adaptation? Who,
but a few wild visionaries, and rash speculatists,
___________J




92         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
and mistaken advocates of woman's rights, would
take her from the home of her husband, her children, and her own heart, to wear out her strength,
to consume her time, and to destroy her fbminiine
excellence in committee-rooms, on platforms, and
in mechanics' or philosophical institutions? But
may not woman, in every way in her power, benefit society by her talents and her influence? Certainly, in every legitimate way. Her sphere is
clearly assigned to her by Providence; and only
by very special and obvious calls should she be induced' to leave it. Whatever breaks down the
modest reserve, the domestic virtues, the feminine
gentleness of woman, is an injury done to the community. Woman can be spared from the lecturer's
chair, the platforms of general convocation, and the
scenes of public business; but she can not be spared
from the hearth of her husband and the circle of her
children. Substitutes can be found for her in the
one, but not in the other. In the bosom of domestic privacy she fulfills the truest dignity and faithfulness, the first and highest obligations of her sex.
Monod's remarks on this subject are so beautiful,
appropriate, and just, that I shall be more than forgiven for the following long quotaticn:
"Is not the humble sphere which we assign to
woman, precisely that for which her whole being is
predisposed and preconstituted? Ier finer but
more fragile conformation, the quicker pulsation of
her. heart, the more exquisite sensibility of her
nerves, the delicacy of her organs, and even the




W OMAN' S MISSION.          93
softness of her features, all combine to make her
what St. Peter so aptly designates'the weaker
vessel,' and render her constitutionally unfitfor incessant and weighty cares, for the duties of the
state, for the vigils of the cabinet, for all that which
yields renown in the world.
"Again, are not the powers of her mind equally
distinct? The question is sometimes started, are
they equal to those of man? They are neither
equal nor unequal; they are different, being wisely
adapted to another end.
" For the accomplishment of the work assigned
to man, woman's faculties are inferior to his; or,
rather, she is not adapted to it. We speak of the
general rule, and not of exceptions. It must be
conceded that, by way of exception, there are
among women some few whose intellects are adapted to the cares reserved, on principle, to the other
sex, or that peculiar situations may rise in which
women of ordinary capacities are called upon to
discharge the duties assigned to man, man in that
case being the defaulter;.provided, however, that
these exceptions are clearly indicated by God, or
called for by the interests of humanity. For after
all, in the mission of woman, humility is but the
means, charity the end, to which all must be subservient. And why should not God who has made
exceptions of this nature in sacred history, do the
same in ordinary life?
"Be this as it may, we leave exceptions to God,
and to the conscience of the individual, and, ab



94          YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
staining from all irritating, personal, or contestable
questions, will confine ourselves simply to the
general rule.
" Generally speaking, enlarged views of politics
and science, the bold flight of metaphysics, the
sublimer conceptions of poetry, which, bursting
every shackle, soar in the boundless region of
thought and imagination, are not in the province of
woman.
"In that limited sphere, however, of which we
are speaking-limited in extent, but boundless in
influence, within which, supported by Scripture, we
exhort woman to confine her actions; she is endowed with faculties superior to those of man, or,
rather, she alone is adapted to it. Here she has
her requital; here she proves herself mistress of
the field; and employs those secret resources which
might be termed admirable, if they did not inspire
a more tender sentiment both toward her and toward God, who has so richly endowed her.
"Her practical survey, equally sure and rapid;
her quick and accurate perception; her wonderful
power of penetrating the heart, in a way unknown
and impracticable to man; her never-failing presence of mind and personal attention on all occasions; her constant though imperceptible vigilance;
her numerous and fertile resources in the management of her domestic affairs; her ever-ready access
and willing audience to all who need her; her freedom of thought and action in the midst of the most
agonizing sufferings and accumulated embarrass.




WOMAN'S MISSION.            95
ments; her elasticity-may I say her perseverance?
-despite of feebleness; her exquisitely tender feel.
ings; her tact so practiced, were it not instinctive;
her extreme perfection in little things; her dexterous
industry in the work of her hands (Prov. xxxi. 13);
her incomparable skill in nursing the sick; in cheerilg a broken spirit; in re-awakening a sleeping conscience; in reopening a heart that has long been
closed; in fine, innumerable are the things which
she accomplishes, and which man can neither discern
nor effect without the aid of her eye and her hand."
Now look at woman's natural adaptation for her
sphere. If the view here given of woman's mission
be correct, we can in a moment perceive what is
required to enable her to fulfill it. There must be,
what indeed there generally is pervading the sex, a
consciousness of subordination without any sense
of degradation, or any wish that it were otherwise.
She scarcely needs to be taught that in the domestic
economy she is second, and not first, that " the man
is the head of the woman." It is a law of nature
written on the heart, and coincides exactly with the
law of God written on the page of revelation. It is
first of all an instinct, and then confirmed by rea,
son. Without this law deeply engraven and constantly felt as well as known, her situation would be
endured as a slavery, and she would be constantly
endeavoring to throw off the yoke. Her condition
would be wretched, and she would make all wretched around her. With such a sense of oppression,
or even of hardship pressing upon the mind; no
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96         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
duty could be well performed, and the family would
be a scene of domestic warfare. But she generally
knows her place, and feels it her happiness as well
as her duty to keep it. It is not necessity, but even
choice, that produces a willing subjection. She is
contented it should be so, for God has implanted
the disposition in her nature.
Then her gentleness is another part of her qualification for her duty. She should have, must have,
really has influence, power, impulsion, if not compulsion. Were she utterly powerless, she could do
nothing. Her influence, however, is a kind of passive power-it is the power that draws rather than
drives, and commands by obeying. Her gentleness
makes her great. How winning are her smiles;
how melting her tears; how insinuating her words!
Woman loses her power when she parts from her
gentleness. It is this very yieldingness, which, like
the bulrush lifting against the force of the stream,
before which, for a moment, it has bowed, that
gives her a power to rise superior to the force of
circumstances, against which, if stern resistance
were offered, it would break before them. She vanquishes by submission. How necessary is gentleness to the fulfillment of her mission in handling the
young and tender spirits of her children, and training the first delicate shoots of their infantile dispositions; and for directing the feelings of that one
heart on which she depends for her happiness.
There are vast varieties of disposition in women,
and many are sensitive, petulant, irritable, jealous,




WOMAN'S MISSION.            97
quick to feel and to resent; but notwithstanding all
this, and even under all this, there is a gentleness
of disposition which indicates her vocation as destined to influence and constrain by love.
Tenderness is another of her characteristics. The
former related more to manner, this more to disposition; that to habitual conduct toward all persons and all cases, this to the occasional exercise of
sympathy with distress. Tenderness is so characteristic of the female heart, that an unfeeling woman
is considered a libel upon her sex. If compassion
were driven out from  every other habitation, it
would find there its last retreat. HIer heart is so
made of tenderness, that she is ever in danger of
being imposed upon by craft and falsehood. How
suitable such a disposition for one who is to be the
chief comforter of the domestic economy; who is
to mollify the wounds of her husband's heart, and
to heal the sorrows of her children; whose ear is to
listen to every tale of domestic woe, and whose
bosom is to be the lodging-place of all family
grief!
Self-denial is no less necessary for this domestic
mission, than any thing I have yet mentioned.
How much of ease, comfort, enjoyment, must she
surrender who has to consult her husband's comfort
and will before her own; whose happiness is to
consist, in a great measure, in making others happy;
who has first to endure all that is connected with
giving birth to her children, and then all that is
connected with nursing, watching, comforting, and
9




98          YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
training them. One of the most striking instances
in our world of endurance and self-denial, both as
to extent and the cheerfulness with which it is
borne, is the busy, tender, and contented mother of
a rising family. God has given it to her, or else I
sometimes wonder how she can exercise it.
And their see her fortitude in this situation. In
that courage which leads man to the cannon's
mouth, to mount the breach, or to encounter some
terrific danger of any other kind, she is inferior to
mat; but in the fortitude manifested by enduring
bodily suffering, the ills of poverty, the wasting in.
fluence of long-continued privations, the gloom of
solitude, the wrongs of injustice, the cruelty of
neglect, the heel of oppression; is she not in all
this as superior to man, as man is to her in all that
appertains to brute force?
On the subject of woman's fortitude and power
of endurance, I will introduce, though it may be at
some length, the most surprising instance of it perhaps on record, whether in inspired or uninspired
history, which will serve as an appropriate illustration of this part of the subject of my sermon. The
apostle John, in his narrative of the events of the
crucifixion of our Lord, says with beautiful simplicity, and without a single comment, as if he would
not attempt and could not hope to add to the
grandeur of the incident: "Now there stood by the
cross of Jesus, his mother, and his mother's sister,
Mary the wife of Cleophas, and Mary Magdalene."
John xix. 25. That the other women should have




WOMAN'S MISSION.           99
been there is less wonderful, though even their
presence at such a scene, from which it would seem
as if all the apostles had retired, except John, was
indeed an instance of the fortitude of heroic love.
But that his MOTHER should have been there, not
afar off, but by the cross; not prostrate in a swoon,
or beating her breast, wringing her hands, tearing
her hair, and shrieking in frantic grief; but standing in silent, though pensive anguish, to witness the
horrors of crucifixion, so far surpassing those of any
modern method of execution; the crucifixion of her
son, and such a son! 0 wondrous woman! and act,
surpassing wonder! To whatever length endurance
may be carried by attendance at the sick-bed of a
dying friend, how few of even female heroes could
witness the execution of a husband, son, or brother!
I have read of one, who, when her lover was executed for high-treason, had herself conveyed in a
mourning-coach to witness the dreadful process;
and when the whole was closed by severing the head
from the body, that head which had leaned on her
bosom, simply said, " I follow thee," and sighing
forth the name of her slaughtered friend, fell back
in the coach and instantly expired. Here was a
power of endurance carried to a point which nature
could sustain no longer, and it sunk at length crushed
beneath the intolerable burden of its grief. But
behold the scene before us; that mother, in the
dignity and majesty of profound yet composed grief,
endured to the end. Peter had denied his Masterthe other disciples, at the sight of the officers of
_       _______ _________________________i




100        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
justice and the soldiers, amid the deep shadows of
Gethsemane, had deserted Him, and still kept at a
distance from the scene of suffering and danger; but
there, standing by the cross, were these dauntless
holy women, sustaining with wondrous fortitude
the sight of his dying agonies, and confessing their
Lord in the hour of his deepest humiliation, in the
absence of his friends and in the presence of his
foes-and there among them was his MOTHER. I
shall never wonder at any thing that female fortitude, when upheld by Divine grace, can do, after it
could stand in the person of Mary, at the foot of the
cross, when Christ her Son and her Lord was suspended upon it. Nor shall I ever despair of the
support of any woman in the hour and scene of her
deepest woe, who is willing to be sustained, after I
have beheld the mother of our Lord upheld in that
unutterably awful situation. Painters and poets
have not done justice to the dignity of this most
honored of all women. There is still existing a
picture of Annibal Carracci, entitled "The Three
Marys," the subject of which is these holy women
surveying the body of Christ after it was taken
down from the cross. As a work of art it is inimitable, and does' full justice to the painter's skill.
But it does far less justice to the character of the
mother of our Lord, than the apostle's description
of her. In the painting she is represented as in a
swoon over the dead body of Jesus, whose head
reclines on her lap, while the other figures are set
forth in the attitudes of passionate grief. How difI  -L______________;




WOMAN'S MISSION.            101
ferent this to the dignified, majestic, and composed
grief which stood beneath the cross! So far must
art ever fall beneath nature, still lower below the
wonders of grace, and most of all below such grace
as this.
Let woman study this pathetic and amazing
scene, and learn that the deepest love, or the noblest grief, is not that sickly sensibility, that emotional excitability, which is too tender to bear the
sight of suffering; but that which, instead of sinking into hysterical outcries, or retiring with averted
eyes from the sufferer's agonies, or is borne swooning from the sight of tears and blood, can control
its feelings, and brace its nerves, to perform a
woman's part in the hour and scene of woe, and
which none can perform except herself, or, at any
rate, perform so well. Let young women set out
in life practicing that discipline of their emotions,
which, without diminishing aught of the softness
and the tenderness of manner which are the most
feminine characteristics of their sex, or robbing
their hearts of those delicate sympathies and sensibilities which constitute the glory of woman's nature, shall not envelope her judgment in a mist of
feeling, and so enervate her will, as to make her
incapable of resolution, and render her incompetent
in times of her own sorrow and trial, for any thing
besides weeping over the calamities which she might
otherwise remove, and make her altogether unfit for
those hardy services of mercy, which the miseries
of others will sometimes require at her hands.!           9^                    __9*




10o         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
Arising out of this, and as one beautiful display
of it, see her when called to put forth her gentleness, her sympathy, and her self-denial, in the hour
of affliction, and the chamber of sickness. It has
been somewhere beautifully said, that, " In sickness,
there is no hand like woman's hand, no heart like
woman's heart; and there is not. A man's breast
may swell with unquestionable sorrow, and apprehension may rend his mind; yet place him by the
sick couch, and in the shadow, rather than in the
light of the sad lamp that watches it; let him have
to count over the long, dull hours of night, and
wait, alone and sleepless, the struggle of the gray
dawn into the chamber of suffering, let him be appointed to this ministry, even for the sake of the
brother of his heart, or the father of his being, and
his grosser nature, even where it is most perfect,
will tire; his eye will close, and his spirit grow
impatient of the dreary task; and though love and
anxiety remain undiminished, his mind will own to
itself a creeping in of irresistible selfishness, which,
indeed, he may be ashamed of, and struggle to
reject, but which, despite of all his efforts, remains
to characterize his nature, and prove, in one instance,
at least, his manly weakness. But see a mother,
a sister, or a wife, in his place! The woman feels
no weariness, and owns no recollection of self. In
silence, and in the depth of night, she dwells not
only passively, but so far as the qualified term may
express our meaning, joyously. Her ear acquiring
a blind man's instinct, as, from time to time, it




WOMAN'S MISSION.           103
catches the slightest stir, or whisper, or breath, of
the now more than ever loved one, who lies under
the hand of human affliction. Her step, as in obedience to an impulse or a signal, would not waken
a mouse; if she speaks, her accents are a soft echo
of natural harmony, most delicious to the sick
man's ear, conveying all that sound can convey of
pity, comfort, and devotion; and thus, night after
night, she tends him like a creature sent from a
higher world, when all earthly watchfulness has
failed; her eye never winking, her mind never
palled, her nature, which, at all other times, is
weakness, now gaining a superhuman strength and
magnanimity, herself forgotten, and her sex alone
predominant."
But as woman's mission is, in an especial sense,
one of charity, love is, above all things, essential
to its right performance. Here, again, I will give
a long quotation from Monod's beautiful work:
"But in speaking of love, it is less the degree
than the character which is of importance. Love,
as we have before said, is the very essence of
woman's existence. But what love? Let her reflect, and she will find that it is precisely that love
which predisposes her for the vocation of beneficence prescribed for her by the Scriptures. There
are two kinds of love-love which receives, and
love which gives. The former rejoices in the sentiment which it inspires, and the sacrifice it obtains;
the second delights in the sentiment which it experiences, and the sacrifice which it makes. These




104        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
two kinds of love seldom subsist apart, and woman
knows them both. But is it too much to say, that
in her the second predominates? and that her
motto, borrowed from the spontaneous love of her
Saviour is,'It is more blessed to give than to receive.'-Acts xx. 33.
"To be loved! This, we well know, is the joy
of a woman's heart; but, alas! how often is this joy
denied her! Yet let her continue to love-to consecrate herself by love; it is the exigency of her
soul-the very law of her existence; a law which
nothing can ever hinder her from obeying.
"Man, also, is no stranger to this feeling; he,
too, must love; but his is the love in which St.
Paul sums up the obligations imposed upon the
husband in conjugal life.'Husbands, love your
wives,' even as he sums up the duties of submission on the part of the wife:' Wives, obey your
husbands.' But what we are treating of here, is
not the obligation, nor the faculty: it is the inclination to love.
" Love, it must be remembered, is less spontaneous-less disinterested among men than among
women. Less spontaneous: man is often obliged
to conquer himself, in order to love; woman need
only listen to the dictates of her innate feelings.
Hence, Scripture, which frequently commands'the
husband to love,' abstains from giving this command to the wife,taking it for granted that nature
herself would supply the injunction.
"Moreover, the love of woman is more disinter.




WOMAN'S MISSION.           105
ested. Man loves woman more for his own sake
than for hers; woman, on the contrary, loves man
less for her own sake than for his. Man, because
he is not sufficient in himself, loves that which has
been given him of God; woman, because she feels
that she is needed, loves him to whom God has
given her. If solitude weighs heavily upon man,
it is because life has no charms for him when separated from his helpmeet; if woman dreads living
alone, it is because life has lost its aim, while she
has none to whom she can be'an helpmeet.' Of
her it may be said, if we may be permitted to make
the comparison, in the emphatic language of Scripture,'We love her, because she first loved us.'"
If such, then, be woman's mission, and who will
deny or question it, then how immensely important
is it that this should be well understood, and that she
should be properly trained to perform it well. But
is this really understood, and is education so conducted as to qualify woman for her mission? It requires little knowledge of modern society to answer
these questions in the negative.
Parents, and especially mothers, ye who have
daughters, to you appertains the serious, and deliberate, and prayerful consideration, of this momentous
and deeply interesting subject. Look upon those
girls whom Providence has committed to your care,
and say to yourselves, "I very distinctly perceive,
and as impressively feel, the importance of the female character on account of its influence upon the
well-being of society. And it is clear to me, that




106         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
woman's is a domestic mission, which is to affect
society through the medium of family influence.
As she fills up her place with wisdom and propriety,
so will she promote the well-being of the community. Nor is it society only, but the Church of
Christ, that is concerned in, and promoted by, the
female character. Now, I have daughters, who
must contribute their share of influence to the public weal or woe. How shall they be educated, so
as best to fulfill their mission, should they be called
to preside over the domestic economy? It depends
much upon me, whether they fail or succeed in this
their mission." These are appropriate, weighty, and
necessary reflections, and they peculiarly belong to
mothers. To then, I say, in all your conduct never
let these thoughts and views be long out of your
minds. Look beyond the drawing-rooms of your
fiiends, where your daughters are to be sometimes
seen, perhaps shown. Look higher than to get them
married, even well married. Take into account
their being well qualified to fulfill their mission.
Set them before you as the future heads of a domestic establishment, and prepare them to preside ovle
it with dignity and efficiency.
How much in modern education is calculated, if
not intended, rather to prepare our females to dazzle
in the circle of fashion and the gay party, than to
shine in the retirement of home. To polish the exterior by what are called accomplishments, seems
to be more the object, than to give a solid substratum of piety, intelligence, good sense, and social
[ __        ___________   _            __________________




WOMAN'S MISSION.           107
virtue. Never was a subject less understood than
education. To store the memory with facts, or to
cultivate the taste for music, singing, drawing, languages, and needle-work, are the ultimatum with
many. The use of the intellect in the way of deep
reflection, sound judgment, accurate discrimination,
is not taught as it should be; while the direction of
the will, the cultivation of the heart, and the formation of the character, are lamentably neglected.
We ask not the sacrifice of any thing that can add
grace, and elegance, and ornament, to the feminine
character; but we do want incorporated with this,
more of what is masculine in knowledge and wisdom.
We want to see woman educated not to be man's
play-thing, but his companion. We want to see her
invested with something higher and better than
fashionable littlenesses, elegant trifles, and fascinating
airs. We want her to be fitted to hold fast her
husband's heart by the esteem he bears for her judgment; to inspire the confidence and reverence of
her children, and in that home where her potent influence is felt, to train up men and women who shall
add to the strength and glory of the nation.
In this, let mothers be assisted by those to whom
they intrust the education of their daughters when
they pass fiom their hands. It is melancholy to
think of the incompetency of a large portion of those
to whom the education of females is intrusted.
How little has it ever occurred to many of them to
inquire into woman's mission: what is necessary to
qualify them for it, and how they shall aid her in




108         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
obtaining this fitness. Iow rarely does it come
within their comprehension that it is their duty, and
should be their study, not only to give knowledge, but
wisdom; not only to train the performer, the artist,
or the linguist, but to lay the foundation of the character of the sincere Christian, the intelligent woman, the prudent wife, the judicious mother, the sagacious mistress, and the useful member of society.
And if in a sermon to women, and when I am
addressing mothers, there be no impropriety in
turning aside for a few moments to address myself
as well to fathers, I would say to them, study
deeply, and ponder much the momentous importance of THE DOMESTIC CONSTITUTION. In the present age, how much has been said and written respecting improvements in society; but never let it
be forgotten that all radical improvement must
commence in the homes and at the hearts of our
families. All inquiries how best to cure existing
evils, or to supply existing defects, which do not
begin here, will be superficial in their nature, and
unsatisfactory in their results. It is in the correct
understanding of the nature of parental obligations,
and right discharge of the duties of man and wife
toward each other and their children, that the chief
restorative remedy for the diseases of a nation must
be sought, as well as the best means of preserving
its health.  Institutions may be set up to aid or to
supplement a father's efforts, or to alter the nature,
or widen the sphere of woman's mission; and an
artificial state of social life may be produced, var.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _   _ _ _   _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ ___ _ _ _ _




WOMAN'S MISSION.           109
nished and glittering with the showy devices of
human wisdom, but it will be found in the end,
that the purposes of the God of nature, the Great
Author of human society, can not be frustrated;
and that the parent must still be regarded as the
educator of the child, and home the school for the
formation of character.
And here I would remind you of your privileges
as Protestants, in having no intruder thrusting himself into your families, or exerting, without coming
there, through the medium of the confessional, and
from behind the parent's chair, an influence greater
than that of the parent's, whether father or mother.
A French writer thus depicts the homes of his country: " The question is about our family-that sacred
asylum in which we all desire to seek the repose of
the heart. We return, exhausted, to the domestic
hearth; but do we find there the repose we sigh
for? Let us not dissemble, but acknowledge to
ourselves how things are. There is, in our family,
a sad difference of sentiment, and the most serious
of all. We may speak to our mothers, wives, and
daughters, on any of the subjects which form the
topics of conversation, with indifferent persons,
such as business, or the news of the day; but never
on subjects that affect the heart, or moral life, such
as eternity, religion, the soul, and God! Choose,
for instance, the moment when we naturally feel
disposed to meditate with our family in common
thought, some quiet evening, at the family table;
venture even there-in your own house-at your
10
__  _ _  __ _  _...... ^ _. _..




110          YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
own fireside-to say one word about these things:
your mother sadly shakes her head; your wife contradicts you; your daughter, by her very silence,
shows her disapprobation. They are on one side
of the table, and you on the other, alone. One would
think that in the midst of them, and opposite to
you, was seated an invisible personage to contradict
whatever you may say." This scene the author can
not forget.  He recurs to it once more: "You enter a house in the evening, and sit down at the
family table; one thing will almost always strike
you: the mother and daughters are, together, of
one and the same opinion, on one side, while the
father is on the other, and alone.  What does this
mean? It means that there is some one man at his
table whom you do not see, to contradict and give
the lie to whatever the father may utter."*
* " Priests, Women, and Families," by Michelet. There
are many opinions in this work, of which I can not, for a
moment, be supposed to approve, but is not this view of the
domestic economy in France too true? According to this
author, there are more than 620,000 girls training up by
nuns, under the direction, too, of men, themselves unmarried, and therefore grossly ignorant of what a family is.
To these he adds 200,000 boys, 6,000 sisters of charity, and
myriads of women. All these youths, it will be remembered, are but single branches, young and tender ones, too,
unnaturally torn from their parent stem or family tree.
Thus the domestic hearth of every home is daily infested by
the intrusion of one man, strangely styled the director,
or spirtual guide! The individual whom we are accustomed to regard as the head of the house —the father-is treated by the intruder as a cipher. In his absence, court is




WOMAN'S MISSION.            111
Nor should young females themselves be kept in
ignorance of woman's mission. Their future desti
ny, as stated in the last sermon, should sometimes,
by a wise mother or an able governess, be set-before
them; and they themselves reminded how much
will be needed on their part, to prepare themselves
for their future lot. They must be reminded that
above and beyond accomplishments, there is character to be formed, which never can be done without their own aid. They must be early impressed
-not indeed in a way to inflate their vanity, but to
excite their ambition, to stimulate their energies,
and to direct their aim-that they have a mission
on earth, for which it becomes them most anxiously
and most diligently to prepare themselves. Let it
be your constant aim, and at the same time vour
earnest prayer, that you may first of all thoroughly
understand your mission, and then diligently prepare
for it, and hereafter as successfully fulfill it. Look
round and see what women commend themselves
most to your judgment as worthy of imitation. You
will see some, perhaps, in whom, as Monod says,
paid to the mother-the weaker vessel-and what is truly
melancholy as well as singular, we are expressly assured,
the father is generally aware that these men are bringing up his children against himself! A more fatal invasion of God's own domestic constitution has never been
framed and so shamefully accomplished. It resembles the
recorded origin of all evil. Here is the serpent once more
beguiling Eve through his subtlety. This intruder on forbidden ground must prove' the canker-worm of many a
gentle breast."-ANDERSON'S Domestic Constitution.




112        YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
reserve has degenerated into supineness, activity into
restlessness, vigilance into curiosity, tact into cunning, penetration into censoriousness, promptitude
into levity, fluency into loquacity, grace into coquetry, taste into fastidiousness, aptitude into presumptioh, influence into intrigue, empire into domination, and tenderness into morbid susceptibility;
some whose power of loving is converted into jealousy; and their desire of usefulness into obtrusiveness. From such turn away, as from examples in
which the best qualities are metamorphosed into the
worst. And equally avoid those whose whole aim
seems to be to amuse and be amused; whose vanity
is predominant, even in matronly age; and who appear, in their taste for gayety, company, and entertainments, to forget that they have any mission upon
earth, except to flutter in a drawing-room, and to
dazzle its guests. On the contrary, select for your
models those who seem to be aware of woman's
destiny and mission, as A HELPMEET FOR MAN.
If in closing a sermon, already too long, I may
suggest a few things which, in preparing to fulfill well
your future mission, it is of importance you should
attend to, I would mention the following:
Deeply ponderl that character for life is usually
formed in youth. It is the golden season of life,
and to none more truly and eminently so than to
the young woman. Her leisure, her freedom from
care, and her protected situation, give her the opportunity for this, which it is her wisdom and her duty
to consider, embrace, and improve.




WOMAN'S MISSION.           113
It is of immense consequence you should consider
that whosoever may help you, and whatever appliances from without may be brought to bear upon
your mind and heart, you must, to a considerable
extent, be the constructor of your own character.
Set out in life with a deep conviction of the momentous consequence of self-discipline. Let your mind,
your heart, your conscience, be the chief object of
your solicitude.
Lay the basis of all your excellences in true religion-the religion of the heart-the religion of
penitence, faith in Christ, love to God, a holy and
heavenly mind.  No character can be well-constructed, safe, complete, beautiful, or useful, without
this.
Cultivate those dispositions of mind which have
especial reference to your future mission as the helpmeet for man. Improve your mind, and grow in
intelligence by a thirst for knowleege; for how can
an ignorant woman be a companion for a sensible
man? Cherish a thoughtful, reflective turn of mind.
Look beneath the surface of things; beyond their
present aspect to their future consequences. Be
somewhat meditative, and learn to restrain your
words and feelings by a rigid self-control. Pay
most anxious attention to your temper, and acquire
as much as possible its perfect command. More
women are rendered miserable, and render others
miserable, by neglect of this than perhaps by any
other means whatever. Let meekness of disposition and gentleness of manner be a constant study.
10*




114        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
These are woman's amiabilities, which fit her for her
future situation far better than the bold, imposing,
and obtrusive airs of those who mistake the secret
of woman's influence.
Contentment and patience, self-denial and submission, humility and subordination, prudence and discretion, are all virtues, the seeds of which should
be sown by you in early youth, that the rich ripe
fruits of them might be gathered in future life.
Benevolence of heart, and kindness of disposition,
must be among your foremost studies, the most
prominent objects of your pursuit and most laborious
endeavors, for these are the virtues which in their
maturity are to form the matronly excellence, and
constitute you the fit companion for a husband.
Make accomplishments subordinate to more substantial excellences. Let the former be to the latter
only as the burnish of the gold, or the sparkle of
the diamond. And as matters of mental taste are
to be less thought of than the state of the heart and
the formation of moral character, so let especially
corporeal decorations be in low estimation compared
with those of the mind.
To prepare you to carry out the duties of your
future mission with ease to yourself, with satisfaction to a husband, and comfort to a household, pay
attention to the minor virtues-punctuality, love of
order, and dispatch. These are all of immense importance: the want of them in the female head of
a family, must necessarily fill the home with confu.
sion, and the hearts of its inmates with sadness.




WOMAN'S MISSION.          115
Set out in life with a deep conviction of the importance of habits. and a constant recollection that habits
for life are formed in youth; and that these habits,
if not acquired then, are never likely to be.
Aim at universal excellence. Do little things
well. Avoid with extreme dread a loose, slovenly,
and careless way of doing any thing proper to be
done.
Young Women, your whole future life will illustrate and confirm the truth and propriety of this
advice, either by the comfort and usefulness which
result from attending to it, or by the personal and
relative misery which will inevitably follow, from
your casting it into oblivion. It is in this way only
you can fulfill with effect that which it has been the
object of this discourse to set before you-WoMAN's MISSION IN SOCIAL LIFE,




"I love them that love me; and those that seek me
early shall find me " —PRovRB s  viii. 17.
IN the world of nature, we are now passing
through the vernal quarter of the year. Spring,
lovely, animating spring, is shedding its reviving
and gladdening smiles upon us. It is always a
season of beauty. "For lo! the winter is past, the
rain is over and gone; the flowers appear on the
earth; the time of the singing of birds is come, and
the voice of the turtle is heard in the land."  Nature stands forth dressed in her garb of living green,
decorated with the chaste colors, and perfumed with
the mild fiagrance of the violet, the primrose, and
the cowslip. It is a season of joy as well as
beauty; recovered from  the gloom   of wintry
months, the earth smiles, and is vocal with delight.
The feathered songsters of the grove blend theil
notes with the lowing of the herds and the bleating
of the flocks; and the harmony is completed by the
joyful sounds of the husbandman, and the gentle
swell of the ocean breaking mildly upon the shore.
But it is also a season of activity, as well as of love



EARLY FEMALE PIETY.          117
liness and delight. The farmer is busy in his
fields, the florist in his green-house, and the horticulturist in his garden; and the torpor produced by
short days and cold nights is succeeded by universal motion: for full well is it known and felt, that
a seedless spring must be followed by a fruitless
autumn. Hope adds the finishing mark, the stroke
of grace, to vernal scenes. The blade springing
from the well-cultivated soil, and the blossom pendant from the well-pruned tree, give the promise
and prospect of the future crop.
And what is youth but the vernal period of existence; it is the season of beauty and of joy; it
should be the season of activity and of hope. It is
now that the beauty of the human form is in all its
untainted freshness, and the spirits of our animal
nature are in all their unchecked vigor. And it
should be now that all the energies of the soul are
put forth in the way of self-improvement, to awaken
the hopes, not only of their possessor, but of every
observer. Do, my young fiiends, thus look abroad
upon the field of nature; not only to poetize, but
to moralize; not only to admire, but to imitate;
not only to feel the throb of pleasure and thrill of
delight, but to learn lessons of wisdom, and collect
motives for self-improvement. You are, then, indeed you are, passing through your moral spring,
and as in nature, so in your existence, there can be
but one spring in the year; and in each case, it is
the spring that will give the character to the whole
of the year that follows. It is then the seeds of in



118         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
telligence, of prudence, of virtue, of piety must be
sown, or there will be no produce in the after-periods
of your history. A seedless spring must here also
be followed by a fruitless autumn, and a destitute,
dreary, and cheerless winter.
This sermon is devoted to the enforcement of
early piety.
Your first concern-and deep, indeed, should that
concern be-is, of course, to understand the nature
of real religion. This is of momentous importance.
No language can exaggerate it. There can be no
hyperbole here. Upon a right understanding of
this subject is suspended your happiness for eternity. Ponder that word ETERNITY, and think of the
millions of millions of ages, passing comprehension,
it includes; all to be filled with torment or bliss,
according as you understand and practice, or mistake the nature and neglect the claims of true religion. Should not this awaken solicitude of the
deepest kind? What should increase the concern
of your mind to deep solicitude, and almost to distress, is that both our Lord and his apostles lead us
to believe, by what they have said, that mistakes on
this subject are very common and very destructive,
as you may learn by consulting the following passages of Holy Scripture: Psalm cxxxix. 23, 24;
Matt. vii. 13-28; 1 Cor. xiii.; 2 Cor. xiii. 5-7;
Gal. iv. 11-18; vi. 3-5.
To guard against mistakes, go to the right source
of information; consult the only infallible oraclethe Word of God. You have the Bible in your




EARLY FEMALE PIETY.          119
hand; search that-search it yourselves, and for
yourselves. Do not be satisfied with merely consulting men's works, but consult God's own Word.
All churches, whatever they may boast, may err,
have erred, and have no authority or ability to set
tle this matter for you. Creeds and catechisms,
prayer-books and missals, formularies and confes
sions, are none of them pure truth; this appertains
only to the Bible. The Bible, the Bible alone, is
the religion of Christians. Not that I would have
you reject the help of these things, but only their
authority. A humble, docile mind will be thankful for human aid in the great business of religion.
There is a medium between despising assistance
and so depending upon it as to cast off all selfinquiry.  The pert and flippant self-sufficiency
which would lead a young woman to neglect, much
more despise, the judgment of those who have stud
ied the Word of God more closely than it is possi
ble she can have done, and whose calling it is to
teach it, is no proof of that humility which is one
of the brightest ornaments of her sex. It can not,
therefore, be my intention to teach young females
to think lightly of ministers and books, in the momentous concerns of religion; but simply to remind them of their duty to search the Scriptures
for themselves, by which authority all books and all
ministers are to be tried.
Before we come to this source of information on
the nature of religion, we may just remark that there
are on, or two things which we may presume be



120         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
forehand must of necessity characterize it. Since
religion has first of all and chiefly to do with God,
and since God can and does regard, search, and
judge the heart-the true seat of religion must be
the heart. It is not a mere outward thing-a round
of ceremonies-or a course of unintelligent action.
The soul must be religious; our whole inner selfthe intellect-the will-the affections-the conscience-must be under the influence of piety. Mark
this: there must be thought-choice-affectionconscientiousness. Again, whatever be true religion, it must primarily relate to God, and must of
necessity be a right state of mind and heart toward
him. It must also be to its possessor a very serious, solemn, important matter; it supposes great
concern, for it is an affair for salvation-eternityheaven. It must make a very different kind of
character from that of the person who is not living
under its influence. It is too great a matter to
leave no mark, to produce no impression, to form
no peculiarity. So that we may be sure while it
lives properly in the heart, it will develop itself
visibly in the outward character.
With these ideas, which are at once obvious, instructive, and impressive, let us open the New Testament and see what descriptions of religion we
find there; and we beg your very closest attention
to them, as in the presence of God and the prospect
of eternity. The apostle Paul, in setting forth the
subject and substance of his ministry, describes it
thus: "Testifying both to the Jews, and also to the




EARLY FEMALE PIETY.          121
Greeks, repentance toward God, and faith in our
Lord Jesus Christ"-Acts xx. 21. This, then, is
true religion-repentance and faith. If we turn to
the Gospel by John, we read thus: " But as many as
received Him, to them gave he power to become the
sons of God, even to them that believe on his
name; which were born, not of blood, nor of the
will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of
God" —Chap. i. 12, 13. This is also repeated in
the third chapter: "Jesus answered, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, except a man be born of water
and of the spirit, he can not enter into the kingdom
of God."   This is religion, a new spiritual birth;
or, in other words, an entire spiritual renovation of
our fallen and corrupt nature. Then, again, we may
quote the apostle's words in that beautiful chapter on
charity: "And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these
three; but the greatest of these is charity"-1 Cor.
xiii. 13. This also is religion —faith, hope, love.
Similar to this is his language in his Epistle to the
Galatians: "For in Jesus Christ neither circumcision availeth any thing, nor uncircumcision; but
faith which worketh by love"-Chap. v. 6.  This
is an immensely important passage, as showing
that no outward ceremonial observances or church
relationship constitute religion; but a true, simple
faith in Christ for salvation; producing love to God,
to man, to holiness. This accords with what our
Lord said, "Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with
all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all
thy mind. This is the first and great command11




122         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
ment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt
love thy neighbor as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets"Matt. xxii. 37-40, Then, again, the apostle said,
" For the grace of God that bringeth salvation, hath
appeared to all men, teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly,
righteously, and godly, in this present world; looking for that blessed hope, and the glorious appearing of the great God and our Saviour Jesus Christ;
who gave himself for us, that he might redeem us
fiom all iniquity, and purify unto himself a peculiar
people, zealous of good works"-Titus ii. 11-14.
As marking the solicitude which characterizes true
religion, we mnay refer to Acts xvi.: "And brought
them out, and said, Sirs, WHAT MUST I Do TO BE
SAVED?" And what was Paul's answer? " GBELIEVE
ON THE LORD JESUS CHRIST, and thou shalt be saved."
Observe, then, from. these passages, what is religion and its usual order? Tnue conviction of sin;
deep solicitude about pardon and salvation; confession of sin, without defense, excuse, or palliation; genuine repentance; self-renunciation; faith
in Christ, or a simple reliance on him for salvation;
the new birth, or an entire change of our corrupt
nature; love to God, leading to obedience of his
commands; and a holy life, a serious observance
of all the ordinances of religion, including baptism
and the Lord's Supper. Are these things so? Is
this the description of religion given us in the New
Testament? Who will pretend to deny it? Search




EARLY FEMALE PIETY.          123
for yourselves! You will see at once how this answers to the general description of it previously
given, as a thing of the heart-a right state of mind
toward God-a matter of deep concern to the mind
that possesses it-and making an obvious distinction between him who has it and him who has it
not.
You are in danger, my young friends, from the
female temperament-from   your sensibility, susceptibility, and imaginativeness-of having your
minds led astray on the subject of religion, and of
considering it rather as a matter of feeling than of
principle-as belonging rather to the emotions than
to the judgment and the will. You are liable to
be seduced from the truth by appeals to the senses
and the imagination, with which the spurious religion of the present day abounds. But I again say,
search the New Testament and judge for yourselves,
and say what do you find there about tasteful architecture, gorgeous ceremonies, splendid dresses,
sacerdotal assumptions, sacred days, either of fast.
ing or festivity, church authority, or even of the
prevalence of devotional observances over moral
duties. What you find everywhere is faith, love,
peace, hope, holiness; a religion of which devotion
is, indeed, an element; but only one out of many;
being ever associated with self-government, consci
entiousness, social excellence, and charity. Nor is
the religion of the New Testament merely that
state of mind which is moved by a pathetic sermon,
which melts at the Lord's Supper, or is excited by




124        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
the picturesque appeals of a missionary meeting.
Religion has to do, I know, with our whole nature,
and therefore with its emotional part; but then,
the degree of sensibility so much depends upon
physical constitution, that excitability by religious
ordinances is far less to be depended upon as a test
of personal godliness, than a rigid self-government,
a resolute will in the way of righteousness, and a
tender conscientiousness, carried on in obedience to
the Divine authority, and under a constraining
sense of the love of Christ. None are more in
danger, therefore, of self-delusion on this subject
than yourselves.
I may now lay before you the OBLIGATIONS you
are under to possess, and ever to cultivate and act
under the influence of such a religion as this. I
say obligations. This is a stern, hard word, but
not too much so. The subject is pressed down
upon your judgment, heart, will, and conscience, by
all the weight and power of a divine authority.
Religion is not one of those matters which are submitted to your option, for which, if you have a
taste, well; and if not, still well. Nor are you
left to form your own religion, and to select for
yourself just in what form you will please God and
find your way to heaven. This is the dangerous
delusion of many in the present day. It is all well
enough, they think, to be religious after some
fashion; but each must adopt his own way of serving God. Upon this principle of resolving it all
into taste, the person of no religion, if his taste be
L-                     _




EARLY FEMALE PIETY.         125
that way, is on nearly the same footing as he whose
religion is simply according to his own liking. The
truth must be told, and told plainly, too, that there
is but one religion, and that is the religion of the
Bible. To be pious at all, we must be pious in
God's way. It would be a strange thing if, when a
master had given any strict, explicit, and ever
written orders to a servant, how he would be served,
the servant should choose his own way of obedience,
and set aside the directions he had received. In
all honesty, therefore, I must tell you at once, harsh
as the declaration may seem, that without religion,
and without the religion of the Bible, too, you will
perish everlastingly. There is no way to heaven
but by the religion of the Bible. " He that believeth on the Son hath everlasting life; and he that
believeth not the Son shall not see life; but the
wrath of God abideth on him"-John iii. 36.
These are awful words-they roll like thunder, and
flash like lightning, not from Sinai, but even from
Calvary, and they should be pondered by all who
hear or read them.
The obligations to a life of religion arise out of
the relations in which you stand to God. He is
your Creator, Preserver, and Benefactor, and you
are his creatures, his dependents, and his beneficiaries. You feel, my young friends, your obligations to your parents, arising out of your relation
to them. As a child, you feel bound to love, and
serve, and please them. What! and not feel your
relation to God, which is a thousand times more
11*




126        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
close than that of your connection with them.
Yes, you sustain an individual relationship to God.
Do you consider this?2 Have you considered it?
Have you ever yet, in devout seriousness, said,
What and where is God, my Maker? What do I
owe him, and how should I conduct myself toward
him? Is God the only relation you should leave
out of consideration, and forget? Did you ever
yet, in all your life, devoutly ponder this relationship to God, and the claims which it brings? Why,
if he had never commanded you to love and serve
him, you ought to do so, on account of this relationship. But he has commanded it. Your Bible
is his demand upon you. It is God's voice enjoining you to be truly, and constantly, and consistently
religious. It is his formal, explicit, frequently, and
solemnly-repeated claim.  Its injunctions command-its invitations allure-its promises encourage-its threatenings warn-its judgments alarm
you, to be truly pious. It is given to teach you
what religion is, how it is to be practiced, and how
it will be rewarded.
And then this is all addressed to you. Religion
is not merely the concern of the middle-aged and
the old, but of the young; not of the other sex
only, but of yours. Indeed, it has ever flourished
more among persons of your sex and age than
among any other class. To imagine it is only the
business of old age and a death-bed, is an insult
both to it and to God. Ought he not to have the
first and the best of our days? Should he be put
-1~~~~



EARLY FEMALE PIETY.         127
off with the dregs of life 2 Will you dare entertain
such an idea as offering those dying remains of existence, that are of no service for any thing else —
the refuse of sin, Satan, and the world? Does not
your fear tremble at such a thought, and your generosity scorn it, and your sense of gratitude recoil
from it?
I will now advance some MOTIVES by which early
piety may be enforced upon you, some persuasives
to induce you to submit to its influence.
Alas, that you should need them! Think of its
being told to the angels in heaven, that mortals
upon earth need to be urged by inducements to
love, serve, and glorify that God whose service is
felt to be their bliss, their honor, and their reward.
However, you do need them, and they are at hand.
There are motives which apply to you in common
with the other sex. Such, for instance, as the nature of religion itself. What for dignity, for happiness, for honor, can be compared with it? What
constituted the glory of unfallen woman in Paradise?  Religion.  It was her piety toward God
that invested Eve, before she had spoiled the beauty
of her soul, with her brightest charms. Conceive
of her, bending in lowly reverence, in ardent affection, and in ineffable gratitude, before the throne
of God; passing with holy dread and averted eye
the tree of knowledge, to feed upon the fruit which
grew upon the tree of life, and hold communion
with her husband in that sacramental type and
pledge of immortality. Not a thought, or feeling,




128         YOUNGt WOMAN S FRIEND.
or volition was then in opposition to God. She
heard his voice in the garden, and hasted to meet
him. Now religion is intended to bring you back
as near to that state as our fallen nature in this
sinful world will admit of. Yes, religion was the
repose of her happy and holy spirit, of which the
fall deprived her, and which it is the design of the
whole scheme of redemption to restore to her
daughters as well as to her sons. True, your religion must have some ingredients which hers before
her lapse had not; but in so far as it consists in the
service of God, it is the same in substance. Look
up into heaven, and what constitutes the felicity and
glory of the blessed inhabitants of that happy
world? Is not religion the beauty of every spirit
made perfect-the ephod in which every seraph
ministers before the throne of the Eternal? But
to judge of the real dignity, honor, and felicity of
true religion, hear what our Divine Lord said. On
one occasion, "A certain woman of the company
lifted up her voice, and said unto him, Blessed is
the womb that bare thee, and the paps which thou
hast sucked."  And who does not justify this congratulation to that distinguished woman, to whom
was granted the honor of being the mother of the
Saviour of the world? What woman on earth
would not have esteemed such an honor infinitely
higher than to have been the queen of the whole
earth? And yet what was the reply of Christ?
"Yea, rather blessed are they that hear the Word
of God, and keep it"-Luke xi. 27, 28. "Yea,




EARLY FEMALE PIETY.            129
she is to be congratulated; but still higher is the
honor of being a child of God by true piety, than
the abstract honor of being the mother of Christ
without it." Beautiful is the language of Quesnel,
the pious Jansenist, on this passage: "The holy
Virgin is not blessed in having borne Christ on any
other account; but only because he, being much
more holy than the holiest of saints, made her
worthy to be his mother by sanctifying her. Christ
does not blame the woman for praising his mother,
but he completes it by intimating that her blessedness proceeded from her having borne the Son of
God in her heart, even before she bare him in her
womb." In other words, he declares her honor as
a woman would have been of no account to her,
but for her religion as a saint.*
Is it possible, my young female friends, to find a
richer, loftier commendation of the dignity and
felicity of true religion than this, which places those
who possess it higher than the mere honor of giving
* Could any language of our Lord have tended more effectually to rebuke those preposterous and blasphemous
honors to the Virgin, which are set up by the Papists? It
would seem as if, foreseeing all that the Church of Rome
has accumulated of error and impiety in this way, he had
determined in the most effectual and impressive manner, to
furnish the antidote and refutation in this impressive language. Let any one study the spirit of this reply of Christ
to the congratulation of the woman that blessed his mother,
and say if it is not the most convincing answer which could
be given to the dreadful system of Mariolatry, which prevails so extensively in that corrupt and apostate Church.




130        YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
birth to the humanity of Christ? I wish you most
intently to ponder this fact of the gospel history.
In common with the other sex, you also are liable
to the stroke of death, and therefore youth may be
the only time given you to attend to this high concern; so that if neglected then, it may be neglected
forever. In the pathetic and poetical language of
Job, it is said, "Man cometh forth like a flower,
and is cut down."  How impressive this figure of
the frailty of humanity! Man is not like the cedar
of Lebanon, or the oak of the forest, that defies
and outlives the storms of centuries; no, nor the
shrub of the mountain-side; nor even the flower,
watched by the gardener's care, and protected by
the green-house from the frost and hail, the storm
and rain; but the flower exposed to the force of the
elements, and the vicissitudes of the weather, soon
and easily destroyed by adverse influences. Such
is humanity-tender, frail, and fragile. How often
have we seen some lovely flower in our garden,
destined fiom its nature to live in full-blown beauty
through a long summer, suddenly pierced by the
arrows of frost, just when its bud was bursting and
opening its beauties to the sun and the eyes of the
beholder, and then drooping its head upon its stalk,
and gradually withering away. So also have we
often seen some interesting female, apparently designed to live long upon earth, smitten by consump
tion, at a time when all her powers of body and
of mind were developing into womanhood, and
wasting away by incurable disease, till death closed.____ _______




EARLY FEMALE PIETY.         131
the scene, and left us weeping over this lovely
flower cut down in spring. What multitudes of
such faded, withering flowers do we see every year!
Could we, from some high place in the air, look
down into all the, chambers of sickness only of this
one town, how many interesting young females
should we see struggling with disease, and sinking,
some amid the tears of parents, beholding their
pride and hope thus incurably diseased; and others,
amid the anguish of heart-stricken lovers thus witnessing the flower cut down just when they expected
to transplant it into their own garden of domestic
delights. Oh, painful reverse! to sigh out the last
adieu at such a time, and under such circumstances;
to put on the shroud instead of the bridal attire; to
go down to the tomb, instead of taking possession
of the elegantly-furnished house; and be gathered
to " the congregation of the dead," instead of going
into the gay circles of the living! Does this never
happen? Alas, ye mourners! your sighs and tears
answer in the affirmative. Yes, and you, my yolng
friends, may add to the number. Would you die
without religion? No, you answer, not for a thousand worlds. Then why live another hour without
it? To have it in a dying hour, you must seek it
in living ones. Few find it on the bed of death.
With religion shedding its luster on the tomb, and
pouring its consolations into your bosom; with the
attractions of heaven drawing up your soul to its
glories; with a hope full of immortality impelling
you on to the mansions of the just men made per




132         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
feet, you will be able to turn away from earth
when it is holding out its brightest scenes to your
view, and scarcely cast one longing, lingering look
behind.*
But should you live, as in all probability you
will, still if you neglect religion in youth, you will
most likely neglect it forever. There is nothing
in any case, and in reference to any thing, more
likely to perpetuate itself than neglect. Procrastination grows, like other things, with indulgence.
Nothing in all the world requires prompt decision
so much as religion. Nothing is more likely to be
postponed forever, if postponed from the present
moment. I have no doubt you intend to be pious.
You would shudder at the idea of deliberately purposing and determining to abandon religion forever. It would appear to you the height of impiety,
a species of blasphemy, to say, I will never become a Christian."  Yes, and it is thus that Satan
would cheat you out of your salvation. He will
allow you to be as solemn, and serious, and even
sincere in your intentions, as you please, to be religious at some future time, if he can persuade you
to put it off fiom the present moment " to a more
convenient season." But you must be told that
not one in a thousand of those who go through the
period of youth amid evangelical advantages of religion, and with a deliberate postponement of the
* See an illustration of this in the appendix extracted
from the author's little volume, entitled, "The Flower
Faded; or, Memoir of Clementine Cuvier."




EARLY FEMALE PIETY           133
matter to futurity, ever fulfill their purposes. Those
who come to womanhood, and collect around them
the cares and anxieties of a wife, a mother, and a
mistress, without religion, rarely ever find leisure
or inclination for it in such circumstances.
But I now go on to dwell on some motives and
persuasions to early piety, which appertain with
greater force to your sex than to the other, or, at any
rate, to a large proportion of them. Consider, then,
your natural temperament. There can be no doubt
that though religion is not exclusively, or principally, it is partially a matter of emotion. In many
affairs of human conduct we are moved to action
partly by our feelings, even before the decisions of
the judgment are made and deliberated upon. The
head should always move and lead the heart, but
oftentimes the heart rouses and moves the head.
The feelings are excited even when the judgment is
only half-awake and informed. This is, no doubt,
the case in religion. Your quicker sensibility, your
softer nature, your tenderer heart, your greater
imaginativeness, render you ever naturally more
susceptible of pious impression. Religion contains,
not only much that is stern, bold, sublime; much
that is truly logical and truly philosophical, which
addresses itself to the judgment, but much that is
pathetic, tender, really touching, that appeals to the
heart. You are more easily moved to fear, and
therefore the terrors of the Divine law have greater
power to cause you to tremble. You are more
readily excited to pity, sorrow, and love; and
12




134        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
therefore the gospel-that wondrous mixture of
suffering, grief, and mercy-more powerfully stirs
up your tender emotions, and calls into exercise
your gentle affections. I do not forget that you
partake of the common corruption of our nature,
and that you also need the grace of the Holy Spirit
for your conversion; but still I contenid, that so far
as natural advantages are to be taken into consideration, the very temperament of your minds is in
your favor. Hence it is, that so many more women
are truly pious than men. It is not that the gospel is unworthy the more robust intellect of the
other sex, but that it falls in more with the softer
nature of yours. In most things the God of grace
seems to follow the order established by the God of
nature. For you to neglect religion, therefore,
seems a greater opposition to the very constitution
of your minds than even for the other sex.
I may mention in reference to many of you, your
sheltered condition at home, and the protection you
there enjoy. Your brothers must go out into the
world, encounter its temptations, and be exposed to
its moral dangers. While they are in peril of making shipwreck of faith and a good conscience on the
troubled ocean of human life, there are you in the
quiet haven of a pleasant domicile. Or, to change
the metaphor, you are nestling under cover of a
mother's wing, while they are left, in all their inexperience and moral feebleness, to the attacks of birds
of prey. A young man's life, away from home, is
always, but especially in these times, a perilous




EARLY FEMALE PIETY.          135
situation to his spiritual and eternal welfare. The
eye of his father can not watch him, nor his voice
warn hilm; but you are always under inspection,
and the first symptom of misconduct is observed,
and calls forth expostulation.
Besides this, at home you enjoy, if the children
of the godly, many religious advantages. There,
the morning and evening sacrifice at the altar of
family devotion is offered, in which you are called
to join. There, you regulirly accompany your parents to the house of God, keep holy the Sabbath,
and enjoy the other ordinances of social worship.
There, you are guarded fiom the withering influence
of evil companionship. How favorable is all this
to the cultivation of piety. Should your heart be
inclined to serve the Lord, you have not to encounter the jeers of scoffing associates, the poisoned arrows of infidel wit, or the sharp spears of profane
humor. No hero or martyr-like moral courage is
requisite to enable you to persevere in a religious
course, as is sometimes the case with your brothers; on the contrary, every advantage will be afforded you; the stones will be gathered out of your
path, and the narrow gate that leadeth to life will
be widened.
Nor is this all, for independently of parental vigilance and home-protection, your sex is less exposed
to the assaults of those temptations which assail young
men, conquer the virtue of so many, and harden
their hearts against the impressions of religion. A
keen sense of female decorum has thrown a cover




136         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
ing over you. By common consent, a vicious worn
an is a more vicious character than a profligate man,
and hence a more rare one. The prodigal son is,
alas! no unfrequent character; but the prodigal
daughter does not often occur. A tenth part of the
criminality which some men commit who yet retain their place in respectable society, would banish
woman from it forever. That there is far too much
of this toleration for the vices of our sex by the
members of yours is certain, and does not speak so
well for even your regard for virtue as could be
wished. But that there is too much intolerance of
the improprieties of female conduct, can not be admitted. It is this high sense of female honor, this
moral delicacy, this fastidious modesty, which are
at once your glory and your protection. But then
this very circumstance increases your responsibility.
You are not hardened by crime into insensibility,
nor confirmed by repeated acts of sin in guilty habits, nor petrified by infidelity into a stone-like indifference to religious impressions. The moral sus.
ceptibilities are not so blunted by long-continued
vicious courses as to leave no avenue open to the
heart for the voice of warning.
And then consider one thing more-your leisure.
I now speak of females living at home with their
parents, and not necessitated to earn their support
by their own labor. Your time, except that which
is put in requisition by a judicious mother for her
assistance in household matters, is all your own.
Your brothers, whether at home or abroad, must of




EARLY FEMALE PIETY.          137
necessity be much engaged in business. Their time
is scarcely at their own command; and too often
this is felt, or at any rate pleaded, as an excuse for
neglecting the claims of religion-the salvation of
the soul.  You have no such excuse. Your time is
so much at command that you can walk, or read, or
work, or visit, at will. Yes, you have so much leisure, that to get rid of time, which sometimes hangs
heavy on your hand, some of you, I fear, squander
hours a day upon useless labors of fancy and taste.
You, of all persons in our world, are the last who
can say they have no time to think of eternity-no
opportunity to seek for salvation. Is it possible
you should overlook your present happy freedom
from solicitude of almost every kind? You will,
perhaps, at once think of the apostle's words:'; There is a difference between a wife and a virgin;
the unmarried woman careth for the things of the
Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in
spirit; but she that is married careth for the things
of the world, how she may please her husband"1 Cor. vii. 34. How much of instruction, warning,
and advice is there in these few words. The apostle did not intend to say what all unmarried females
actually do; alas! we know that too many of them
do not care to please the Lord; but his meaning is,
that in the absence of all the solicitudes of a wife, a
mother, and a mistress, they have a most favorable
opportunity to attend to the things that belong to
the soul. Ah, young woman, you can perhaps form
some idea of what awaits you by seeing what has
12*




138        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
come upon the head, the heart, and the hands of
your mother. With the most judicious domestic
arrangements, and a mind happily freed from excessive care and troublous thoughts, how incessant
are her cares, how exhausting of time, strength, and
spirits, are her duties. She has no resting hoursno holiday seasons-no sabbatic leisure-but care,
care, incessant care, is often her lot. Is this the
time, and are these the circumstances, to which you
would postpone the consideration of the high concern of religion? Is it amid such distractions of
thought, and such perturbation of feeling, and such
occupancy of time, you would begin the momentour
pursuit of salvation, and the sacred duties of religion? Why the real, yea the established and eminent
Christian woman finds it as much as she can do to
keep alive her piety amid so many perplexities and
demands. And will you begin it then? These remarks apply to all, even to those who have servants
at command, but especially to those who have no
such helps. Females of the laboring class, how,
with a mother's duties, will you be able to commence a religious life, with your unshared and sleepless anxieties? Oh, let me say with an emphasis
borrowed from what I have witnessed myself, " Remember your Creator in the days of your youth.",Halcyon season, did you but know it! Improve it
while it lasts.
Dwell, my female friends, upon these rich advant.
ages placed by the order of Providence withir
your reach. And their practical value and tendency




EARLY FEMALE PIETY.         139
are evident in their results. How else shall we account for it that so much larger a number of the
disciples of Christ are found among your sex, than
in the other 2 It is not, I repeat, that there is in
religion that which it is said better suits the intellect of the weaker vessel than that of the stronger.
This is a double insult, first of all to religion itself,
as if it were adapted only to imbecility, and to you,
as if that imbecility were yours.  The circumstances I have just stated will account for it, without supposing either that your minds or the proofs
of revealed religion are weak. Religion, which is
the glory of an archangel, and the very image of
God, can never be below the dignity of man, or unworthy the attention of the mightiest intellect. If
religion depended upon authority, a thousand times
more of lofty intellect has been arrayed on the side
of Christianity than has been marshaled against it.
In addition to the circumstances mentioned above,
to account for the prevalence of piety among your
sex, I might mention that it would seem as if God
had intended it for the greater humiliation of Satan,
that as he triumphed over man by woman, so God
would triumph over him by woman-that as she
was the instrument of his success in the fall, she
should be the instrument of his humiliation in redemption; that she who was the first to come under his yoke, should be the most eager to throw it
off, and thus his trophy be snatched from his hand;
and his boast be rendered nugatory by the power
of Him who came to bruise the serpent's head, and
____ ____________________




140         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND
to destroy the works of the devil. But there is
another mark of the wisdom of God in this arrangement, which is, that as religion is so momentous to
the interests of society and the welfare of immortal
souls, the sex should be most inclined to it to
which is consigned the first formation of the human
character.
I will now set before you the BENEFITS which
will accrue to you from early piety.
Are the blessings of religion itself nothing? For
recollect, piety is not merely the performance of
duties, but also the enjoyment of benefits. This is
too much forgotten, and the whole business of a
holy life is regarded by many in something of the
light of penance; or at any rate of a service somewhat rigid and severe. If it zvere so, it would still
be our wisdom to attend to it, since it is the only
thing that can prepare us for heaven and eternity.
That it is service, is very true; but it is also a
state of privilege. It is the service not of a slave,
but of a child; and with the duties of a child, it
brings also the privileges of a child. You have all
your sins pardoned-your persons accepted of God
-your hearts renewed by regeneration, and yourselves brought into this new relation by adoption.
Dwell upon that one thought-a child of God!
Can you conceive of any thing higher, greater, nobler? Is the relation of an angel superior. To be
able to say in the fullest, richest sense of the language, " Our FATHER which art in heaven" —to be
the object of divine love, care, interest-to be inter



EARLY FEMALE PIETY.         141
ested in all the privileges of the divine, redeemed,
and heavenly family! Oh, my young friends, is this
nothing? Is it not every thing? Many of you are
orphans, and is it not blissful to say, " When my
father and my mother forsake me, then the Lord
will take me up?" Is it not a blessed thing tc
have him for the guide of your youth? Hear what
God says: "Wherefore, come out from   among
them, and I will be a father to you, and ye shall be
my sons and my daughters, saith the Lord Almighty."  O hear his voice, accept his invitation,
and come into his family! Hence it is we propose
religion to you, not simply in the shape of duty, but
of bliss. Yes. It is another name for happiness:
and can you be happy too soon? You want to be
happy. You are made for happiness, and are capable of it; and where will you find it? Pleasure
saith, " It is not in me;" and knowledge saith, "It
is not in me."  Rank, fashion, and wealth affirm,
" We have heard the fame thereof with our ears."
But religion saith, " Ho! every one that thirsteth,
come ye to the fountain, and take of the water of
life freely." Universal experience attests that pure
and full satisfaction is not to be found for the soul
of man in any of the possessions of this world; and
if they were satisfying, they are all uncertain; mere
unsubstantial shadows, which flit before us and are
lost. You have, perhaps, formed totally wrong
conceptions of religion. "Happiness," you say,
"in religion! We can conceive of it as dutysomewhat severe, though incumbent duty; but to




142         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
speak of religion yielding pleasure, is like supposing the entrance of a ghost would increase the delights of a ball-room."  Yes, I know it is in youi
imagination, or at least of some of you, a spectral
form, muffled,,sullen, and gloomy; frightening the
young by its awful look, petrifying them by its icy
touch, and casting over them  its own gloomy
shadow.  Ah, no, you mistake it. On the contrary, it is a seraph from the presence of God, lighting on our orb, clad in robes of celestial beauty,
radiant with beams of glory, shedding smiles of
joy on this dark scene, and echoing the'angels'
song, " Glory to God in the highest, on earth peace
and good will to men." That ministering spirit
meets you, my female friends, just setting out in
life, offers to be your guide, protector, and comforter, through all your perilous journey to eternity.
Hear her voice as she beckons you to follow her:
"If you are in danger, I will shield you; if you are
desolate, I will befriend you; if you are poor, I
will enrich you; if you are sorrowful, I will comfort you; if you are sick, I will visit you; in the
dangerous walks of life, I will protect you; in the
agonies of death, I will sustain you; and then, when
your spirit quits its clay tabernacle, I will conduct
you into the presence of God, where there is fullness of joy, and place you at his right hand, where.
there are pleasures for evermore."  And will you
refuse such a friend?  Will you turn away
from  such bliss?  Religion, gloom, and melancholy! Yes, if Eden was a gloomy place. Yes,
a  c~~- C?-_4 ________________________




EARLY FEMALE PIETY.'         143
if heaven be a region of sighs and tears. Yes, if
saints made perfect and holy angels are clad in
sackcloth, and the song of the seraphim is changed
into the groan of despair. Oh, no, "her ways are
ways of pleasantness, and all her paths are peace."
Her duties are pleasant-her very sorrows are
mixed with joys-to say nothing of her privileges.
perhaps I may suggest, without at all intending
to uttera suspicion of your regard to virtue, or a
reflection upon your firm attachment to its rules,
that you may need religion in youth, to protect
you from the moral dangers to which even females
are exposed. A vicious woman, I have already admitted, is a much rarer character than a vicious
man; but still it sometimes occurs. What could
not the records of some institutions reveal of this
nature? How many victims of the tempter's wiles
could there be found, who would have been preserved from degradation and misery had they been
found under the protecting influence of religion,
when the assault was made upon their purity or
honesty. I know that multitudes are kept strictly
chaste and upright without religion; but I know
that of the numbers which have fallen, not one
would have lapsed if they had been living in the
fear of God. After Eve's fall in Paradise from.perfect innocence, no woman should feel offended
by the admonition to be cautious and vigilant; nor
suppose that her situation, her feelings, or her principles, so place her beyond the reach of temptation,
that her safety is guaranteed with absolute certainty.
_____________I




144        YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
"Pride goeth before destruction, and a haughty
spirit before a fall."  To many a once high-minded
woman, proud of her reputation, the taunt has been
uttered by the victims of frailty, "Art thou also
become weak as we?" " Be not high-minded, then,
but fear."
But you need religion for your consolation amid
the sorrows of your lot. If it be truly said of man,
that he " is born to trouble as the sparks fly upward," it may with greater emphasis be so said of
woman. As if in the way of righteous retribution,
she who mixed the bitter cup of human woe is
called to drink the deepest of its dregs. Sorrows
are apportioned to her sex in common with ours,
and there is scarcely an affliction to which humanity is incident to which she is not herself exposed.
In addition, how many has she peculiar to herself?
The weaker vessel, she is liable to be oppressed by
the stronger; and to what an extent is this oppression carried on! How is she trodden down, not
only in countries where the protective influence of
Christianity is not known, but in this where it is?
To how much greater bodily infirmity is her more
delicately wrought and fragile fiame subjected, than
ours? Dwell upon her dependence, and in many
cases her helplessness. To me the situation of
some single, friendless women is the very type of
desolation. Then think of her privations, her sufferings, her cares, her labors, as a mother. I admire
the patience, the contentment, the submission,
which enable her, without repining, to say, " I am a




EARLY FEMALE PIETY.         145
woman," and not complain of the hardness of her
lot; for certain it is, that her groans are loudest in
those of creation. Think not, my young friends, I
am scaring you into religion, by filling your minds
with these gloomy forebodings. By no means; but
I am anxious to prepare you by the sweet, soothing, tranquilizing, and mollifying power of religion,
to meet a woman's trials by a woman's piety. It
is piety alone which can lighten the cross. This
only can inspire that passive fortitude which to you
is more essential than active strength. And surely
religion never appears more lovely, more mighty,
more sublime, than when it suppresses the groan of
despair, and keeps alight the last ray of hope in the
most depressed circumstances-when it stifles the
cry of pain, and wipes the drops of anguish from
the sufferer's brow-when it imparts a martyr's
courage to the gentlest spirit-when, as we said in
the last discourse, it teaches woman to bend like
the-bulrush in submission to the stream of sorrow,
and then to rise in fortitude and faith from the
pressure of the wave. Religion will not avert the
cup of sorrow from woman, nor change her lot;
but it will somewhat sweeten the bitterness of the
one, and soften the hardness of the other.
Early religion will prepare you above all things
for USEFULNESS. Young women, would you set
out in life without a wish, a purpose, an aim to be
useful? Can you be so destitute of all benevolence, ambition, and nobleness of spirit, as not to
desire to do good? I am aware that without piety
13




146         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
you may do much to bless your species, but with
it how much more may you not do? As this, however, will be the subject of a future sermon, I shall
not enlarge upon it here further than to say, that
religion gives the greatest power, and strongest
disposition, and most adequate qualifications for
usefulness, that can be possessed on earth, both in
single and in wedded life. A truly, fervently, and
consistently religious woman, must be a benefactress
of her species.
Early piety is at once the most secure basis and
the most complete finish of ALL female excellence.
Look over what is said in a previous'sermon on
"Woman's Mission," and the virtues and tenderness that qualify her to fulfill it, and think what a
support to all these is furnished by sincere piety.
The surest basis of all moral excellence will be
found here. What is so productive of humility-of
meekness and gentleness-of contentment and submission-and of self-denial and fortitude? Where,
in what soil, will these mild and yet heroic dispositions grow and flourish so luxuriantly as in that of
piety? We have stated that woman is created to
love and be beloved. To love is natural to her;
and what cherishes this state of mind like religion,
which both in its doctrines and duties is one bright
and glorious manifestation of love to the universe?
To all these varied excellences religion adds the
firmness and consistency of principle, the power
and government of conscience, and takes them out
of the region of mere taste. And then what a
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EARLY FEMALE PIETY.          147
holy and ineffable loveliness does it throw over the
female character! Beauty is woman's attribute,
and her form, when seen in more than usual charms,
is the most perfect type of exquisite symmetry to
be found in the whole material universe. And if
woman's form be the finest specimen of material
beauty, woman's piety is the most attractive instance of that which is moral. Who can look upon
the well-executed pictorial representations of this,
as seen in paintings and engravings, without admiration? Where does woman look so altogether
lovely as when seen lifting the eye of devotion to
heaven-that eye in which faith, hope, and love
seem  all to mingle and express their emotions'
The Church of Rome has known the power of this,
and has maintained its dominion in some measure
over its votaries, by the power of the painter's art
in depicting female beauty associated with female
piety. In a religious female, the beauty of heaven
and earth combines; the graces of the seraph and
those of the daughters of Adam are united: just as
in a holy man the sublimer grandeur of mortals
and immoratals is found associated. Piety then is
the last and finest polish of female excellence. My
young frieAds, may this be yours!
Yet, notwithstanding all this, many of you are
not pious. Do consider what a chasm in excellence remains to be filled up-what a defect to be
supplied-while religion is wanting in the female
character. A woman may as well be without heart
as without religion; and there are few men, how
[_- ____    ___   _    ___  - _          _____1




148        YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
ever irreligious themselves, but would shrink from
impiety in her: it involves a coldness and hardness
of character offensive both to taste and feeling.
" Even when infidelity was more in vogue than at
present, when it had almost monopolized'talent,
and identified itself with enlightened sentiment, the
few women who volunteered under its banner were
treated with the contempt they deserved. The
female Quixote broke her lance in vindicating the' Rights of Women;' and no one sympathized with
her in her defeat. And depend upon it, whatever
other female follows Mary Wolstencroft, and essays
the emancipation of her sex from the obligations of
piety, will, like her, be consigned to abhorrence by
the verdict of society. The mere suspicion of irreligion lowers a woman in general esteem. Religion
is indeed woman's panoply, and no one who wishes
her happiness would divest her of it; no one who
appreciates her virtues would weaken their best
security."* What is it then that prevents your
giving to the subject of religion that attention
which its infinite and eternal importance demands
and deserves? Let me ask you with a beseeching
importunity, as the apostle did the Galatians,
"Who (or what) did hinder you that ye should
not obey the truth?"  Ah! what? Let me speak
to you of the HINDRANCES that are in the way of
your obtaining life eternal. Hindrances! Should
* "Woman, in her Social and Domestic Character," by
Mrs. John Sandford; a work so judicious, so Christian, and
so elegant, that it can not be too strongly recommended.
L. 




EARLY FEMALE PIETY.         140
aught but absolute impossibilities prevent you 
It is not mfidelity. No. You are not infidels.
You shudder at the idea. A female infidel is a
character as rare as it is odious. Nor is it absolute
irreligion, but the negative character of no religion
that we have most to complain of. Not a direct
opposition to its claims, but the neglect of them for
other things. It is that guilty apathy to the most
momentous subject in the universe; that careless
indifference to the most valuable interests of time
and eternity; that fatal oblivion of all that belongs
to another world, which we regret; that contentment with things seen and temporal, without any
solicitude about things unseen and eternal, that we
deplore. Your minds are pre-occupied. You are
taken up with other things and say to religion when
it appeals to you, "Go thy way for this time, and
when I have a convenient season I will call for
thee." There is, I know, a repugnance to true,
spiritual, vital, earnest piety, which is the natural
working of an unrenewed heart. You can observe
the Sabbath-day forms of godliness by attending
the house of God; but even this is more from custom
than from choice-a kind of weekly compromise
with piety, for so much Sabbath occupation to be
left to yourselves and other pursuits all the rest of
the week. Your religion is nothing more than a
Sunday dress, worn for the place and the season.
But this is not religion, but merely a substitute and
an apology for it.
Some of you are bent upon present worldly enjoy.
13*




150        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
ment. The apostle has described your taste and
your pursuits where he says, " Lovers'of pleasure
more than lovers of God." Ponder that description.  Does it not startle you - horrify you?
Lovers of parties-of the dance and the song; of
the gay scene and frivolous discourse-more than
God. Just look at this thought in all its naked
deformity. A ball, a concert, a route, a partyloved more than God! Not to love God for higher
objects than these-for science, literature, fame,
rank, wealth, is a dreadful state of mind; but to
neglect and despise God for scenes of frivolity,
mirth, and conviviality, is it not shocking? Did
you ever yet seriously reflect thus: " What a soul
I must have that can love pleasure, but can not
love God!" Consider, what will this taste for
pleasure do for you in the hour of sickness; in the
scenes of poverty; the season of tribulation, or the
agonies of death?
In the case of some of those who possess a more
than ordinary degree of personal attraction, the consciousness of beauty fills the mind with self-complacency, and a constant thirst for the admiration
and attention of others. No really elegant woman
can be ignorant of her natural accomplishments;
and too rarely is a beautiful mind the lowly tenant
of a beautiful body. What an odious spectacle is
presented when mind and matter are thus exhibited
in contrast. What beauty can compare with that
of the soul, and what beauty of the soul can compare with that of holiness? This is the beauty of




EARLY FEMALE PIETY.         151
angels; yea, of God himself. How foolish is it tc
be vain of that which a cutaneous eruption may
turn into loathsome deformity, and which, if sickness do not destroy it at once, advancing age
must obliterate, and the grave consume. Many a
woman, even in this world, has had to rue the possession of a captivating face or form, and to deplore
it forever in the world to come. Body and soul,
character and happiness, have in thousands of instances been all sacrificed on the altar and at the
shrine of beauty. Oh, my female friends, take heed
you are not thus ruined!
Vanity displays itself also in attention to personal
decoration, even where there is no pretension to
beauty, and not unfrequently attempts to supply
the want of it. How many are a thousand times
more concerned about jewelry than religion-the
pearl of great price; and about millinery than
about the robe of righteousness and the garments
of salvation. A love of dress is not only a foible
and a fault, but almost a vice, and in innumerable
cases has led to it. Is it not lamentable to conceive
of a rational and immortal being spending her time
and exhausting her solicitude in adorning her body
and caring nothing about the ornaments of her soul;
thinking only how she shall appear in the eyes of
man, but caring nothing how she shall appear in the
eyes of God? Consider how soon that gay attire
must be exchanged for the shroud, and those glittering ornaments for corruption, earth, and worms.
A mind taken up with such vanities can not attend
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152        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
to the sanctities of religion, or the realities o' eternity.
With this is too often associated a levity and
frivolity of disposition which are the very opposite
to that seriousness and sobriety of mind, which a
real regard to spiritual religion requires. There is
no sin in cheerfulness; no piety in gloom. Religion is the happiest thing in the world, for it is, in
fact, the beginning of heaven upon earth. The
woman without a smile, and the man without a
tear, are neither of them a person to my taste.
Religion gives a peace that passeth all understanding, and yields a joy that is unspeakable and full
of glory; so that we wish you to understand, my
young friends, we do not require you in becoming
Christians to take the veil; cut off your tresses;
doff your comely raiment; part with your smiles;
and clothe yourself like a specter in the gloom, and
maintain the sullen silence of the convent. But
religion is still a serious thing; a thing that deals
with God, salvation, heaven, eternity! And surely
the frivolity and the levity that can do nothing but
laugh, and rattle, and court attention by studied
airs, empty loquacity, and personal display, are
utterly incompatible with that dignified, and chas.
tened, yet by no means formal, much less gloomy,
sobriety of mind which religion requires.
Companionship hinders many from giving their
attention to this momentous subject. They are
surrounded by associates who have no taste for
religion; and they have, perhaps, formed a still




EARLY FEMALE PIETY.         153
closer friendship with some one or more who unhappily manifest little or no inclination for this
high and holy concern. From the spell of such a
circle, it is difficult indeed to break away. It has
been thought and said by some, that the influence
of female companionship, both for good and for
evil, is even greater than that of the other sex;
from a supposition that there is less of robust independence and of self-reliance in woman than in
man. If so, how much does it become every female
to take care what companions she selects. How
difficult is it to oppose the spirit and conduct of
those with whom we act. Generally speaking, we
must conform  or secede.  Even if a solicitude
about religion is in some degree awakened, it will
soon be checked and extinguished in the society of
those who have no sympathy with such anxiety.
Shall the dearest friends you have on earth keep
you from salvation? Will you sacrifice your soul,
your immortal soul, at the shrine of friendship?
Will you refuse to go to heaven because others will
not accompany you; and will you go with them to
perdition rather than part company on earth? Will
you carry your friendship so far as to be willing to
be friends even in the bottomless pit?
You are perhaps prejudiced against religion by
the conduct of some of its professors. I am sorry
there is any ground for this. I admit that much
you see in many of them has but little in it to
recommend religion to your favor. And it may be
that some of your own age and sex are included in




154         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
this number. But all this was foretold by Christ,
must be expected as human nature is, and ought
not to be allowed to prejudice your minds against
piety. If you saw a number of persons under a
course of medical treatment which required them
to observe a particular regimen, and which they
constantly violated, and were, of course, no better
for the medicines they took, you would not reject
the system because it did not cure them. Just so
it is with religion. These persons, though they
profess to be under it, are constantly violating its
rules, and are no better than those who do not profess it. But is this a valid reason for rejecting the
system? You are to try religion by its own nature,
as set forth in the Bible, and not by the conduct of
its professors. If your soul should be lost, it will be
no excuse before the bar of God, nor any comfort
to yourselves in the world of despair, that you suffered your mind to be prejudiced against religion
by the misconduct of some who professed it.
And now, in conclusion of this already too long
discourse, let me, young women, conjure you at the
outset of life to consider the great end and purpose
for which, as regards yourselves, your Great Creator placed you in this world. Think not too highly
of yourselves, for you are sinners as well as others,
and need, and may obtain, the salvation that is in
Jesus Christ, with eternal glory. Think not too
meanly of yourselves, for you are immortal creatures, and may inherit everlasting life. Rise to the
true dignity of your nature by rising into the region




EARLY FEMALE PIETY.         15 
of true religion. Consume not your life in pursuits;
innocent it may be, but frivolous and unworthy of
your powers, your destiny, and your duty. With
a clear and right understanding of your mission as
regards this world, connect as clear a perception of
your mission as regards the world to come. Behold
an existence opening before you, which you may
fill with the sanctity, and bliss, and honor of a
Christian, as well as with all the virtues of a
woman. Withdraw your heart from vanity, and
consecrate it to piety. Give the morning of your
day to God, and then, whether it be long or short;
whether it be passed away in wedded or in single
life; whether it be be bright with the sun of prosperity, or dark with the clouds and stormy with the
winds of adversity; whether it shall close suddenly
by one of those visitations to which your sex is
peculiarly exposed, or shall be drawn out to a long
and somewhat gloomy decline, it shall usher in, for
your happy spirit delivered from the burden of the
flesh, that cloudless and eternal morning to which
there shall be no night. Then shall it be found that
THE CHIEF END OF WOMAN,. AS WELL AS MAN, WAS TO
GLORIFY GOD AND ENJOY HIM FOREVEP.




APPENDIX.
ONE morning I paid a pastoral visit to a young lady, a
member of my church, whose family had not long removed
from another part of the country to reside in Birmingham.
On my rising to retire, my young friend informed me that
she had an invalid sister, whom she expected every moment
from her chamber, and who, she said, would be much gratified to see me. I had scarcely resumed my seat, before
there entered the room a most lovely and interesting young
person, whose features, naturally extremely pleasing, derived additional beauty from the fatal hectic with which
they were a little flushed, and which had been increased
by the exertion of coming down stairs. * * As soon as
Martha, for such was her Christian name, had recovered
her breath, which had been rendered short and rather
difficult by the exertion of descending from her chamber,
I entered into conversation with her on the circumstances
of her affliction; a subject which, though in most cases
gloomy and depressing, checked not for a moment the
sweet smile which played upon her engaging countenance.
She soon informed me that she felt she had the sentence of
death in herself, and considered her illness as a voice from
the tomb; and spoke of dying as one that was familiar with
the awful topic. "I have neither love of life," she said,
" nor fear of death: and although I am leaving the world
when its prospects were become most flattering and alluring,
I do not regret it; I have only one desire, and that is after
more communion with God." There was a tear in her eyes,
but it was not the tear of disappointed hope, or bitter regret, but only the tribute of nature, refined, but not destroyed by grace, and which, in fact, added a charm to the
beauties of holiness, that so evidently invested her char



APPENDIX.                  157
acter. The whole strain of her conversation was so calm,
so collected, so dignified, evincing such meek submission,
such humble piety, such weanedness from the world, and
such longing after immortality, that I gazed at her with
wonder and delight, and left the house thinking and
saying that I had scarcely ever witnessed any thing so
seraphic.     *      *     *
Martha had been declining in health for some time; but
on the eleventh of May last, on returning from public worship, she ruptured a blood-vessel in the lungs. * * This
attack of disease she received as an intimation that she
must be ready for the speedy coming of the Son of Man.
Among her private memoranda she had made the following
entry relative to the event: "This dispensation of mercy
brought eternity to my view, and in the evening I had the
sweet assurance that sudden death could have nothing to
alarm me." How strange will it sound to many to hear a
young and beautiful woman, with all the ordinary, and
some of the extraordinary reasons for wishing to live, talk
of an event which would in all probability issue in death,
as a dispensation of mercy. Yet this was neither unnatural
nor irrational. All things work together for good to them
that love God; and death is placed by the apostle among
the privileges of the child of God.  *     *      *
At the time of her attack in May, she was engaged in
the bonds of plighted love to a gentleman to whom she was
tenderly attached, and to whom at no distant period she
was to have been married. It is in vain to suppose that she
could turn from the altar to the tomb, as an object of contemplation, and from this dearest of all friends to the arrest
of the last enemy, without a severe struggle between an
earthly and a spiritual affection.' The conflict was short,
the victory complete; and it was at once the greatest
effort and brightest triumph of her faith, to be made willing
to give up even this dear object of her heart, and to depart
to be with Christ. In reference to this event she sometimes said, "It is mysterious, but I know it is all right.
14




158                  APPENDIX.
My Heavenly Father knows what is best for me."   "1
never," says her sister, " saw greater firmness in her, than
when she adverted to this disappointment of her hopes."
As I did not apprehend from my first visit that her end
was near, and as I was much from home, I did not again
see her for some time; and 0 that all my young friends
could have seen her as I then saw her, lovely in death, like
a moss-rose bud nearly severed from its stock, and just
ready to fall on the ground, with its opening beauties possessing still their freshness and their fragrance! There
was not the shadow of a shade of impatience, anxiety, or
fear, to becloud her beautiful countenance, to check the
smile which irradiated her features, or to dim the ray of
hope which glittered in her fine, expressive eye, as it turned
to that heaven whither her heart had already ascended.
What painter's skill could pencil the looks which I then
saw? All was peace and more than peace: it was a peace
that passeth understanding, rising into a joy unspeakable
and full of glory. Christ, and Christ alone, was her refuge;
and she confessed her exclusive dependence on his blood
and righteousness for acceptance with God. She knew in
whom she had believed, and was persuaded he was able to
keep that which she had committed to him until the day
of Christ. I pass over much that was said during that
most solemn and delightful interview, to mention one remark: " Do you now feel any regret," I said to her, "that
you are leaving the world so early, and when its prospects
were becoming so attractive?"  With an ineffable smile,
she replied, " Our great business in this world is to obtain
the salvation of our souls; and having secured that, I have
accomplished the end of my existence." Glorious and immortal truth! Mighty sentiment!     *              *
A time was fixed for a last sad interview with her once
intended husband. In this scene her faith shone forth in
all its brightness, and patience had its perfect work. While
all around were filled with poignant grief, she was calm.
serene, composed.  Having affectionately uttered some




APPENDIX.                  159
pious counsels to this friend of her heart, and pointed him
to that heaven on the verge of which he saw her, she took
her last farewell, and gave her last look with a tranquility
and fortitude that surprised every one, and which proved
that she was now enjoying too much of the " excellent
glory" to suffer intensely from the rending of any earthly
ties whatever. She looked up into heaven, and saw Jesus
waiting to receive her spirit, and felt that she could leave
for Him, even that friend with whom it was once her
fondest worldly hope to tread the path of life in company.
The scene scarcely ruffled her peace, or drew from her soul
one longing lingering, look to earth, for heaven was fully
in her view.    *      *      -
"In the midst of sufferings, too painful to describe,"
said her sister in a note, " Martha could smile, and tell us
Jesus was near to her. Her countenance, at all times animated and happy, was unusually so now; it beamed with
ineffable brightness, and was a strong and beautiful evidence that all was perfect peace within. When she could
no longer articulate, she looked all we could wish her to say.
About five minutes before she expired, her agonies ceased
-she recognized all of us-and, as though to bid a last
farewell, she smiled, and exclaimed,'Happy, happy!"'
Blessed state of mind! to smile and exclaim, Happy, happy,
even in the cold arms of death.
So died Martha S. Her last farewell to earth was
uttered with the consciousness and the feeling that she was
treading at that moment upon the very threshold of heavenly
glory: and who then need wonder that she could speak of
happiness even in dissolution. As she drew near her everlasting home, she saw the lights of her Father's house, and
unconscious of the gloom of the dark valley of the shadow
of death, from the midst of which she beheld them, she
gave expression to her feelings in a note of holy rapture,
and left the world with accents which we may easily
imagine were also the first she uttered as she touched the
heavenly shore, "Happy! happy!"




160                 APPENDIX.
Behold, young people, another convincing proof and
beautiful display of the power and excellence of religion,
in the deep submission, the solid peace, the joyful content
of this young lady, when called not only to resign life in
the very morning of her day, but to turn from the altar to
the tomb.




"Those women which labored with me in the gos.
pel."-PHILIPPIANS iv. 3
THE subject on which 1 am to address you this
morning harmonizes with the scenes which we have
lately witnessed in the metropolis of our country,
and which, indeed, are scarcely yet over-I mean
the missionary and other religious meetings, which
are held at this season of the year in that great
center of the world's family. The month of May
is wisely selected for the time of holding the anniversaries of these organizations of Christian zeal.
Then, when the principle of fertility: after the
dreariness of another winter, is flowing in a thousand channels, and when all nature, in this country,
is verdant and blossoming with the hopes of another
year, it is well for the Church of Christ to exhibit
those institutions which are, in the moral world,
the vernal signs of retiring frosts and approaching
summer. It is a glorious sight to behold the trooping multitudes hastening with willing feet, and joyful countenances, and beating hearts, to the place
of convocation, and blending all the joys of friendly
14*




162         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
greetings with all the sublimer delights of Chris
tian zeal. We feel called upon, there, to bless God,
not only that we live in a world which he has visited in mercy by the person and work of his incarnate Son, but in an age and country in which so
much is done for the spread of the knowledge of
this great fact to the ends of the earth. At these
meetings all is matter of delight. The crowded
platforms, containing the pastors, deacons, and
members of our churches, who have connected
themselves with the missionary society; the presence of missionaries from the fields of holy labor;
the eloquent addresses of the speakers; the vast
crowd of listening hearers; the thunders of eloquence reverberated in other thunders of applause;
all, all, are calculated to make one feel how happy
an exchange we have made in giving up the pleasures
of sin and the world for those of religion. But there
is one other sight, on these occasions, which is as
delightful as it is common; and that is, the number of women, and especially of young women, that
are always present; thus reminding us how deep
an interest they have in these proceedings, and how
large a share they bear in them. We do not adopt
the world's vocabulary, and talk of the beautiful
and elegantly dressed females that are there; we
would rather speak of "the holy women," like one
apostle, and refer to them as another apostle does
in the text, as "those women which labored in the
gospel."  And, indeed, without going to the metropolis in the month of May, or witnessing the
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FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.        163
scenes of Exeter Hall, what public convocation for
any religious object is ever held in our own, or any
other town, of which women are not far the larger
portion?
But let us attend to what the text says. "Help
those women that labored with me in the gospel."
Then women may labor in the gospel, for they did
in apostolic times, and received the commendation
of the apostle for so doing. If they did then, they
may now; and if they may, they ought. Hard
would be woman's lot, bitter her privation, and
degraded her condition, if, on account of her sex,
she was excluded from all participation, beyond her
own personal religion, in the sublimest enterprise
in the universe. She might well deplore her misfortune, if, while man was permitted the exercise
of religious zeal, she was denied all service at the
altar of God.  "Even heathenism," she would
mournfully exclaim, "honored our sex, as it was
represented by the Vestals, to whose vigilance was
committed the guardianship of the sacred fire; and
by its priestesses, to whose inspiration was intrusted the responses of the oracles. And does the religion of Jesus exclude us?" No, it does not, and
we refer you back to our first two sermons for
proof that it does not; and we call your attention
in the present one, to learn how you may avail
yourselves of the honor placed within your reach,
and discharge the obligations you are under to promote the interests of religion in this dark, disor.
dered world.
~__________________________________.J




164        YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
To be useful in the cause of God! How noble,
how vast, how sublime, how godlike an idea!
Dwell for a moment upon it. Did you ever weigh
the import of that very common, but very delightful word, USEFULNESS! Did you ever ponder in
sober seriousness of thought the cognate phrase,
"To BE USEFUL?7  Have you never had your admiration excited by hearing it said of any one, " She is
a useful woman V" I can not let you hear or read
another syllable till I have endeavored to fascinate
you, if possible, by the beauty, and to captivate
you by the force of that glorious word, USEFULNESS.
Look at its opposite, uselessness. How low, and
dull, and mean a sound; and how despicable the
character it represents. A rational, social, and immortal being, useless-doing no good-carrying on
no benevolent activity-exerting no beneficial influence-a worthless weed, and not a flower-a
pebble of the desert on the shore, and not a gema piece of dead wood floating down the stream, instead of a living fruit-tree growing on its banks.
Yea, worse than all these; for weeds, stones, and
rotten wood may be converted to some good purpose; but to what purpose can one who does no
good be turned, except it be to serve as a warning
to others? May I be successful in working into
your mind and heart, memory and conscience, that
mighty term which I have placed before you, and
inspire you with an abhorrence of being useless,
and an ambition to be useful. Let.your young
hearts beat with a desire to do good. Aspire to




FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.        165
the honor of doing good. Contract not, shrivel not
into a despicable selfishness. Cherish a yearning
after benevolent activity, and feel as if it were but
half living to live only for yourselves.
In this cause, I want you to be even zealous.
The apostle says, " It is good to be zealously affected always in a good thing." Zeal, as you know,
means an earnest, ardent desire, giving rise to a
correspondent energy of action, to obtain some
favorite object; and when directed to a right object
is a noble and elevated state of mind. It is, however, a state of mind that requires great caution as
to its management, especially in the young, and,
most of all, in young females. It is like fire, which
may be applied to many useful purposes when
under proper direction, but which, if not kept in its
proper place, and under proper restraint, may cause
a conflagration. Or, to change the illustration, it
may be only as the healthful vital heat which keeps
the body in comfort and in action, or it may become a fever of the soul, to consume its strength
and destroy its life. Or, to venture, for the sake
of emphasis, even upon a third illustration, many a
zealous mind is set on fire by the speed of its own
action, and for want of some regulator to check its
speed, and some lubricator to lessen its friction,
ignites into a flame that consumes the whole machine, and does mischief to others as well as to
itself. A warm heart requires a cool judgment to
prevent these consequences from a misguided zeal.
The female mind, being so susceptible, is perhaps




166        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
far more liable to incautious action than that of the
opposite sex, and is less disposed to reflection. In
man, the judgment more generally keeps the heart
in check till it is itself enlightened and convinced. 
In woman, the heart often is engaged before the
judgment; and hence the danger of female zeal
being sometimes wrong in its object, excessive in
its degree, and impetuous in its action. Almost
all new theories, whether relating to medicine, theology, or any other practical matters, find favor
first of all chiefly with women. Too often led more
by their feelings than their reason, they get entangled, like their first mother, by appeals to their
passions and affections, and allow their hearts to
lead astray their judgment. Hence, I say to you,
endeavor to enter into the spirit of the apostle's
exhortation, where he enjoins the ancient matrons
to " teach the young women to be sober-minded."
The Greek philosophers classed zeal under three
heads-the zeal of envy, the zeal of emulation, and
the zeal of piety. Extinguish all feelings of the first,
as so many sparks thrown off from a flame kindled
by the fire of the bottomless pit. Have very little
to do beyond an unenvious imitation of what is good,
with the second-and let the third be put under the
guardianship of a sound judgment and the guidance
of Holy Scripture.
I will first of all advert to the OBJECTS of your
zealous activity. You dwell in a vale of tears, and
amid the groans of creation, occasioned by poverty, disease, misfortune, and death, and are not to




FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.        167
be insensible to the sights and sounds of affliction
by which you are surrounded. The female heart is
supposed to be the very dwelling-place of mercy,
and an unfeeling woman is a libel upon her sex:
formed by nature to weep with those that weep, and
to minister, as we showed in a former sermon, to
the bodily woes of humanity, enter into the design
of Providence, and become a ministering angel in
the chamber of sickness. You have seen those
cloaked and demure women who issue from a conventual establishment in the neighborhood of this
town, on errands of mercy to the abodes of sickness
and poverty, deeming no office too menial, no service too self-denying to be performed, which can
alleviate the pains or promote the comfort of the
sufferer. We would not question the purity of
their motives or the tenderness of those offices which
they perform for the children of want and woe; but
it looks, after all, like a shallow device of the church
which employs them to obtrude itself on public notice and to win converts to itself. We call upon
you, without cutting the ties of your connection with
society and abjuring all pretensions to the character
of wife and mother, to be our Sisters of Mercy, and
to make it your business and your pleasure to visit
the scenes of sickness and the abodes of poverty.
Even in youth, acquire the habits, the tenderness,
the delicate tact of a nurse. Loathe that spurious
sentimentality which can weep over the imaginary
woes of a novel, but turns away either with a cal
lous or 4 coward heart from those real sufferings
__ _ __ _ _ __ _ __ _ _ ____ _ __ _ ____ _   __ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  ]




168         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
which abound on every hand. But I now more
particularly refer to zeal fir religion, as well as that
which is manifested under its potency for any other
legitimate object.
Religion is every one's business, not only as regards the possession and practice of it as a personal
concern, but also as regards its difusion. Every
one can be truly pious, and can do something, by
the blessing of God, to make others so. To spread
religion in our world is not merely the work and
duty of its ministers, but of all without exception,
whether young or old, rich or poor, learned or illiterate, male or female. Every one who understands the nature, feels the influence, and values the
privileges of the gospel of Christ, can do something in order to bring others into the same happy
condition. Where there are no desire and effort to
do this, there can be no real piety.  None have any
right to conclude they are in a state of salvation who
have no concern for the salvation of others. Indifference to the eternal welfare of our fellow-creatures
is a certain proof of indifference to our own. There
is room, and opportunity, and obligation, for all to
work in this cause. Even children can do something here, and have done it. A little girl being
deeply affected by the notorious violation of the
Sabbath in the neighborhood where she lived, which
she noticed in the number of shops that were opened
on the Lord's day; went to her minister and solicited some tracts on the subject, which, being inclosed in a neat envelope, she took round and modc —  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ —-— 1 — 1~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~11 —-----— ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~ ~~~~~~~




FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.        169
estly left at the different shops without saying a
word. And as the result of this humble and unostentatious effort, seven shops fiom that time were
closed on the Sabbath. God sometimes employs
the humblest instruments for accomplishing great
purposes, as we observed in one of the last sermons,
when remarking upon the conduct of the little Hebrew maid in Naaman's family. Paganism teaches
us something here; for what said Jehovah to theprophet, when referring to the heathen practices
which the Jews had imitated? "Seest thou not
what they do in the cities of Judah, and in the streets
of Jerusalem? The children gather wood, and the
fathers kindle the fire, and the women knead their
dough, to make cakes to the queen of heaven, and
to pour out drink-offerings unto other gods"-Jer.
vii. 17, 18. What a busy scene! all minds engaged-all hands employed-men, women, and
children. Let us be instructed by this bad example,
and show a zeal for the true God equal to that which
those apostate Jews did for the false ones. Christianity can find work for women and children as
well as Paganism; and how solemn are the obligations it imposes on all who profess it, to propogate it.
But as no service can be well peformed by those
who are not qualified for it, I will here enumerate
the chief PRE-REQUISITES for a course of female activity in the cause of religion.
Religious zeal should, in every case, be the offspring of personal piety. Without this there can
15




170         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
be no intelligent, well-sustained, or very efficient
effort. Something, no doubt, may be accomplished
without this. God may honor labors which were
never truly directed to his glory. But it is only
the truly pious mind that can understand the object
of religious zeal, be actuated by right motives, be
likely long to continue the work, or bring down the
blessing of God upon what is done. Your own
heart must be right with God, or you will know
little about the way of making others so. Example must support exhortation, or the latter will
have little effect. Much of the effort of the present day is sadly wanting in devout seriousness,
spiritual earnestness, and holy solemnity. It is a
bustling, prayerless, unsanctified activity.  There
is often a frivolity about it that looks as if those
who were engaged in it knew not, or forgot, that
they were doing the work of the Lord; all is
so light and frivolous that it is evident, in this
case, zeal is only another species of amusement.
The zeal that is likely to be continuous, to honor
God, to do good to our fellow-creatures, is that
which is cherished in the closet of devotion, fed by
the oil of Scripture, and fanned by the breath of
prayer. There is, upon the minds of those who
manifest it, "that awe which warns them how they
touch a holy thing."
Religious knowledge is essential to well-directed
efforts to do good. I now more particularly refer
to a knowledge of the object to be accomplished,
and the means of accomplishing it. A young per



FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.        171
son, anxious to do spiritual good, should well understand three great principles in religion-the
ruin of human nature by sin-its redemption by
Christ-and its regeneration by the Spirit; and
should consider that all efforts of zeal must be directed to the accomplishment of the two latter.
To fit her for this work, she should study well the
Word of God, read some of the many treatises on
the subject of religion, with which the press teems,
and make herself acquainted with some of the best
tracts and books for putting into the hands of those
who become anxious about religion.
An intense and longing desire to be useful must
lie at the bottom of all her efforts. It is not a
mere love of activity-a taste for social union and
occupation-a desire for power and influence over
others-an ambition for distinction, that is the impulse of religious activity, but a tender pity for
the immortal souls of our fellow-creatures, an earnest solicitude for their salvation, coupled with an
enlightened and fervent zeal for the glory of God.
It is the piety that melted the heart of David when
he said, " Rivers of waters run down mine eyes
because they keep not thy law;" and which agitated
the soul of Paul the apostle, when amid the splendors of Athenian architecture and sculpture,. he was
insensible to all the glory that surrounded him, in
consequence of the sin with which it was associated,
and felt his spirit noved within him at seeing the
city " wholly given to idolatry:" and which, indeed,
is taught in the first three petitions of our Lord's




]172       YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
Prayer: "Hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom
come. Thy will be done on earth, as it is in heaven."  Understand, my young friends, then, what
you have to do-not the work of a low and narrow
sectarianism, in proselyting persons from one denomination to another; nothing resembling the
operations of female Jesuitism; nothing of zeal to
establish one denomination upon the ruins of
another: no, but the nobler and holier work of
saving the souls of your fellow-creatures, especially
those of your own sex, from the dominion of sin
here, and from the wrath to come hereafter. Begin life with an abhorrence of bigotry, and never
let your zeal degenerate into the meanness and malignity of that earth-born spirit; let it be a fire
kindled by a coal taken, by the seraphim, from the
altar of God, and not a flame lighted by a scintillation from the bottomless pit. Be it your aim to
spread that religion which consists not in forms of
government and religious ceremonies, but of faith
in Christ, and love to God, and love to man. To
accomplish this, let there be real engagement of the
heart. Give up your soul to the passion for being
useful. Cherish the most expansive benevolence.
Feel as if you did not understand, or secure, or
enjoy, the end of life, unless you live to be useful.
Account usefulness the charm of existence; the
sugar that sweetens the cup of life. Ever feel as
if you heard a voice saying to you, " Do something;
do it at once; do it heartily; do good-this good
-good to the soul."
L  __~_~_         ______         ______




FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.        173
A habit of self-denial is essential to the exercise
of religious zeal and Christian benevolence. Our
Lord said, " If any man will come after me, let
him deny himself, and take up his cross and follow
me." This is true of the way of holiness, but it is
especially so in that of benevolent activity. Christ
could do us no good without his cross; nor can we
do others much good without ours. We would not
deceive you, and endeavor to lure you into the
career of holy activity by representing it as leading
through a garden of Eden, where all is blooming
and beautiful, ease and enjoyment. No such thing.
The course of religious zeal is often in a wilderness,
over sharp stones and bare rocks, and amid thorns
and nettles. You must make sacrifices of time,
ease, enjoyment, feeling, perhaps of friendships;
you must bear hardship, and encounter many disagreeable things; you must be prepared to give up
self-will, pertinacity, claims to pre-eminence. Can
you be zealous of good works on such terms r If
so, come on; if not, go back; for the career of
mercy is not for such tender feet as yours to tread.
But, my young friends, can you allow yourselves
to sink into such effeminacy and feebleness of char.
acter? Can you be content to degenerate into littleness, and pass through life as a species of nonentity, because you can not endure a noble selfdenial! I do not appeal to your love of romance.
I would not set your imagination on fire, in order
that you might offer up yourselves a burnt-offering
to benevolence in the flames of enthusiasm. I do
15*




174.        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
not stimulate you to become heroines of mercy,
and to set all the comforts of life at defiance. There
are some who love the adventures of a career of
active mercy. There is romance in every thing,
even in pity. I want not this, but I do want to see
young women practicing a sober self-denial, a judicious disregard of ease and comfort, in order to do
good. Unite a masculine hardihood of endurance
with a feminine tenderness of feeling, and delicacy
of manner. Passive fortitude belongs to you.
Patience is another qualification for doing good.
They that would accomplish this must not be weary
in well-doing. There are many things to make
them so-the neglect of others-opposition-disappointment-ingratitude-perhaps censure.  They
who expect to benefit their fellow-creatures with as
much ease and as speedily as others do them injury,
had better not make the attempt, for they are sure
to fail. Scarcely any people in the world have
more need of patience than they who set themselves
to instruct the ignorance, to relieve the wants, to
alleviate the sorrows, and to reform the vices of
their fellow-creatures. See how this was illustrated
in the history of our Lord. Consider how his benevolence was ever resisted by the malignity of those
whom he sought to benefit. He lavished upon
them his mercy, and they upon him their ingratitude. They refused his offers-rejected his invitations-misrepresented his actions-disbelieved his
words-and misconstrued his motives. Never was
so much goodness met with so much envenomed




FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.        175
opposition. Yet behold his patience. A thousandth
part of the opposition which he met with would
have exhausted the forbearance of an archangel;
and yet he endured the contradiction of sinners
against himself-gave them  his tears when they
had refused his miracles-shed for them his blood
when they despised his tears —and bade his disciples to make to them the first proclamation of his
grace, when they had even scoffed at his blood.
Study the history of Christ, my young friends, for
the purpose of seeing, next to your regard to it as
the means of salvation, an example for you to imitate in the career of mercy. Follow him going
about doing good, to teach you with what patience
you should go and do likewise.
Many who are all ardor at starting, soon grow
tired, because they do not find the course easy,
reach not the goal at a bound, or are opposed in
their way. It is a despicable, as well as pitiable
sight, to behold a young person entering into the
work of benevolence so confident and eager, as if
she would surpass all others, and then almost at
the first stage, when the novelty is over, and difficulties arise, and the expected flowers in the path
do not appear-giving all up, and turning back to
indolence, ease, and uselessness. On the contrary,
it is a sight on which angels and God himself might
look down with delight, to see another holding on
her way, even in her humble career of benevolence,
amid disappointment and opposition, persevering
in her attempts to do good, and finding in the con



176         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
sciousness of her aims and motives, and her knowledge of the excellence of her object, a sufficient inducement to persevere, though at present she reaps
little else but discouragement and defeat.
A spirit of dependence upon God for success, united with a high sense of the importance and necessity of human effort, is essential to religious zeal.
This gives a two-fold boldness of mind, and firmness of step; and makes us not only to be strong,
as instruments, in ourselves, but also in the Lord
and in the power of his might. What courage is
derived in the career of benevolence from such a
consideration as this: " I know I am seeking a good
object by right means, and I will go in the strength
of the Lord." * Young women, even in your humble
sphere and efforts to do good, a spirit of believing
prayer, which, indeed, is the spirit in which every
thing should be done, will bring the God of Angels
to your help-the Lord of Hosts to your aid. Go
forth with the consciousness that you are doing
right, and with a belief that Omnipotence is by
your side. It is not pride nor self-conceit, but that
proper sense of capability which every one should
cherish, to say, "I feel I am something, and can do
something; I need not be a cipher, for God has not
made me one. I have a mind, and heart, and will,
and tongue, and with these I may do something for
God and my fellow-creatures. Others of my own
age and sex, feeble and humble as I am, have done
something, and so may I, and by God's help and
blessing I will." You are right-it is all true,




FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.        177
This is not self-esteem, but only self-knowledge.
Cherish these thoughts; act upon them, and you
will do something. With such qualifications, you
may go to the work of religious zeal.
Permit me now-to point out to you the WAYS in
which your zeal may be employed appropriate to
your sex, age, and circumstances. "As we have
opportunity," said the apostle, "let us do good."
Opportunity is a golden word, and is itself more
precious than rubies, and should never be lost by
neglect. There are three things, which if lost, can
never be recovered-time, the soul, and an opportunity. And it is of importance for you to ponder
this. It becomes us all to remember the advice of
the sage to his disciples, "Be ye mindful of opportunities."  Youth is your opportunity for doing
good; not, indeed, if you live, your only one, but
it is a very precious one. The remarks made in the
last sermon on the subject of the leisure afforded by
your present situation for the cultivation of piety,
apply with equal force to the opportunities it affords
for usefulness.  In married life, with a family
around you, and all the cares it brings with it, you
will have comparatively little opportunity, at least,
for some of those activities which you can now carry
forward.
Among the ways in which female activity could
be appropriately carried on, I must begin, of course,
with the education of children in our Sunday-schools.
The instruction of the girls is, of course, intrusted
to females, and what an honor is thus assigned to
i _ ___________________   -   ___________________________




178        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
them! It is passing strange how any young woman
pretending to religion can satisfy herself that she is
doing all she can, or all she ought for God's glory
and the good of her fellow-creatures, who is not devoting her youthful energies to this blessed work.
And yet it is somewhat painful to observe how
many of the young women of the more respectable
families of our congregations, withhold their services from this useful and valuable sphere of female
activity. I am not unaware of some difficulties and
objections to this engagement for their daughters
that present themselves to the mind of a careful,
judicious, and anxious mother.  But surely'the
proper exercise of maternal influence and authority
would, in most cases, be sufficient to counterbalance
those contingent evils to which the mixed society of
the Sunday-school community might expose young
females: I mean in the way of forming acquaintanice and unsuitable connections.  A well-taught
and wisely-trained girl will surely know, and ought
to know, how to avoid a general and undesirable
familiarity, without being suspected of a haughty
disdain, or a proud neglect of those who are not
upon her level in the ranks of social life. It does
require care, I admit, but this care will be sufficient
to avoid the contingent evils alluded to. And I am
free to confess that the frequent and mixed meetings
of the teachers, of both sexes, which are held in
some schools, are by no means necessary for the
good working of the system, and are very undesirable on other accounts; and it is not to be won



FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.        179
dered at, that for this reason many mothers do not
allow their daughters to become teachers, and that
daughters themselves do not wish to engage in the
work.  Acquaintances have, no doubt, in some
cases been formed, by no means suitable. It is
therefore eminently incumbent upon all who are
thus engaged to be anxiously watchful that no part
of their conduct give occasion to those who seek it,
to speak ill of the effect of Sunday-school teaching
upon the character and conduct of the devoted
females who are engaged in it.
District-visiting societies and benevolent institutions for affording temporal relief and spiritual instruction to the sick poor, conducted by female
agency, are become very common, both in' the
Church of England and among Dissenters.    It
would hot be desirable, of course, that these should
be chiefly conducted by young women. Matronly
age, experience, and weight, are necessary to give
propriety and effect to such a labor of love, but
surely there would be no impropriety in associating
even in these good works, a youthful female with
an elderly one.
The Bible and missionary societies, and other
religious institutions, have called into operation a
large number of females who are employed in col.
lecting money for those important organizations,
and for supplying the poor with copies of'the
Word of God. There can be no objection to this,
provided the more youthful portion of the sex so
employed be associated with those who are older,




180        YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
and also that very young girls be not employed at
all in the work. Nothing can be more repugnant
to my sense of propriety, than for young females to
be sent out with what are called' collecting cards,"
to wander over a town, knocking at the doors of
any body and every body, for the purpose of begging money, and sometimes entering into countinghouses, and assailing even young men with their
importunities.
The distribution of religious tracts is another line
of female activity in which many may be eminently
useful. This is a means of doing good universally
characteristic of the age. The press was never so
active either for good or for evil as it is now. Its
productions are instruments which every hand can
wield, not excepting that of a young and even comparatively illiterate female. But the same caution
must be here applied also, that nothing be done to
break down the barriers of female modesty.
Perhaps it will be thought I ought not to overlook
one line of female usefulness peculiar to the sex, and
especially to the youthful portion of it, and that is,
furnishing articles by their pencil and their needle,
the products of which, when sold, shall go to the support of the cause of Christ. There is one way of doing
this, about which I confess I have serious doubts: I
mean the modern practice of BAZAARS, or, as they
are now called, " Fancy Sales."  I am aware of all
the arguments that are employed in favor of them
-such as their gainfulness, and their calling forth
contributions from those who would give or could
I ~.~~-. — 




FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.        181
give in no other way.  A very beautiful little
tract, entitled, "The Bazaar," was published two
years ago, in which the writer, with tolerable show
of argument, endeavored to prove that these means
for the support of religion hardly comport with the
sanctity of the object. A certain air of fiivolity
and worldliness at these sales is thrown over the
whole; so that such a scene looks like piety keeping a stall at " Vanity Fair."  " Recall," says this
writer, " the scene itself, the gay dress, the music,
and the raffle-flattery and compliment instead of
truth. Purchases made from regard to man, and
not free-will offerings to God. Mortification and
disappointment, in place of the approving consciousness of her who'had done what she could.' Skill
exercised in making that which is worthless pass for
much. Arts practiced, advantage taken, with the
excuse that it is for a religious purpose, that would
be thought dishonorable in the common business
transactions of the world. Then follows ennni after
excitement; the gaze of the heap of left things to
be disposed of, or that will do for other bazaars,
with the false estimate of the result of this. There
is another fact in the history of such sales: some
who shun the ball-room and the concert, and never
entered a theater, act there the shop-woman, talk
the nonsense befitting the bazaar-room, and are Us
worldly, vain, and foolish, as she who seldom
dreams of any thing but pleasure, earth, and
time."
Now this, I admit, is rather severe, and is, per16




182        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
haps, a little tinctured with the ruby color of exaggeration. Still there is some truth in it, and it
may serve as a corrective, if it should not as a destructive. To the pure, all things are pure, and
there may be those who can enter, pass through, and
leave such scenes, without receiving the smallest
injury to the devout and happy seriousness of their
religious character. At any rate, it is coming near
the appearance of evil, and should excite caution and
prayer on the part of those who consider the matter
as innocent and therefore lawful. Bazaars, however, are not the only way in which the needle may
be and is employed by pious females for works of
charity. Working parties are very common. I
have one that meets periodically in my own vestry,
where articles of utility are made and shipped for
sale in India, the produce of which, amounting sometimes for one year's labor to eighty pounds, is devoted to the support of orphan-schools connected
with our missionary stations abroad. At these
meetings, piety, friendship, and zeal, all blend their
feelings of enjoyment, and furnish happy seasons
for those who attend them.
I knew a most accomplished woman, long since
in heaven, who was called by grace out of the gay
world, and who, after her conversion, felt an irresistible desire to do something for the spiritual welfare of her fellow-creatures and the glory of God;
but her means were more limited than her aspirations. She thoroughly understood the science of
music, and her most exquisite singing had been the




FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.       183
delight of gay and fashionable circles. Her taste in
drawing and painting was equal to her skill in
music. After her conversion to God, she turned
these elegant accomplishments to the noble purpose
of glorifying God, "who doth instruct man to discretion," by setting some of the most admired
Italian and German airs to sacred words, and painting some Scripture subjects, both of which she sold
among the circle of her friends, often receiving large
sums, especially for her paintings, and consecrating
all, like the woman who broke her alabaster box of
ointment, to the honor of the Saviour whom she intensely loved. Perhaps the eye of some gifted
woman may range over these pages, who may have
a heart for Christ and his cause, with as scanty
means and as rare talents to serve both, as the
female above alluded to; to her would I say, " Go
thou and do likewise."
Is there not one way in which young females,
unable to do much in producing tasteful works,
may be occupied in doing good for God and their
fellow-creatures, without, in the smallest degree,
violating the rule of decorum or infringing on the
delicacy of female modesty-I mean visiting the
chamber of sickness or the cottage ofpoverty, to read
to the poor invalid or to the ignorant of their own
sex the Word of God and religious tracts. Surely
it is no invasion of either the rights of man or the
duties of the minister, for a pious, modest female,
though young-I do not mean children, of courseto go to the bedside of the sufferer, and from Holy
t__________________________.j




184         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
Scripture pour into her ears the words, and into
her heart the sacred truths of that precious volume,
which are the best balm for a wounded spirit, and
the only consolation for a broken heart. Nor can
it be improper for her to take her chair by the side
of a poor mother plying her needle, or watching the
cradle, and ready to hear words whereby she may
be saved. What a field of usefulness, almost unoccupied, is here opened to the ambition and the energies of our pious young women who have leisure
for such occupation! Is it not thus the deficiencies
of church accommodation and ministerial instruction
can be best supplied, and our laboring population,
as to their destitution of religious advantages, be
best overtaken r How many thousands of women
in the laboring class are there in this large town,
and in every other of magnitude, who are so occupied by the cares of their families and the demands
of their husbands, as never to join the public assemblies for worship, nor to hear the joyful sound of
the sermon, or the psalm, who would hail as a
ministering angel the female that would come to
their scene of constant monotonous care and labor,
and cause their dreary abode to echo with the music
that tells them of a present salvation even for them,
and of a land hereafter where the " wicked cease
from troubling, and the *eary are forever at rest."
Oh, ye "devout women, not a few," if ye have
hearts of pity for the poor, or compassion for the
souls that are likely to be lost amid their "being
careful and troubled about many things an: their




FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.       185
much serving;" or if you have any zeal for the glory
of God, do, do, employ your leisure hours in paying
these visits of mercy to the houses of poverty, ignorance, sickness, and misery. Here there can be
nothing in opposition to female modesty, nothing
that can minister to female vanity. The seclusion
of the scene prevents all this; no rude or inquisitive
gaze follows her there; no language of fulsome
compliment or sickly adulation is addressed to her
there; she is alone with sorrow, or witnessed only by
her conscience and her God. Oh, what, to a young
female so occupied, is the most elegant and beautiful woman glittering in the gay scene of fashionable folly, the admiration of many eyes, and the
envy of more? What is all the adulation poured
by the lip of flattery into the ear of beauty, compared with the blessing of her that was ready to
perish, so gratefully bestowed on that sister of
mercy, who had thus "caused the widow's heart to
sing for joy!"
Companionship affords a means of usefulness of
which you ought not to be slow in availing yourself. It may be you have formed friendships in
the days of your thoughtlessness with some as
thoughtless as yourselves.  But you have been
awakened to solemn and holy reflection. You have,
through the work of divine grace, passed from death
unto life; but your friends still remain under the
power of the world and far from God. Here, then,
is a most legitimate object of pious zeal, to seek by
all affectionate and judicious means their conversion
16*




186        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
to Christ. What an honor and felicity would it be,
should you be the means of saving the soul of your
companion. How close and tender would be your
friendship from that hour, when the tie of affection
was doubled and sanctified by the bond of religion!
How happy will be your intercourse, how sweet
your communion! A covenant is made between
you which will go with you to heaven; for all
friendships formed on the basis of religion will last
forever. Take with you then, if you can, to that
happy world, the friend of your heart, there to
renew, perfect, and perpetuate the intercourse which
you have commenced on earth, and realize the idea
that the closest and happiest friendship commenced
below is but the bud, and scarcely even that, which
will blossom with amaranthine freshness through
eternity in heaven.
Woman's talent for a flowing, easy, tender style
of correspondence is generally acknowledged; and
ought she not to employ this as a means of serving
God and her fellow-creatures? How many have
been thus led to an acquaintance with religion!
There is great moral power hi a well-written religious letter. It is known and felt to be an effusion
of love from one heart to affect another. It is read
alone, when no one is a witness of the effect. There
is not the reproving or monitory presence of the
writer. There is no disposition to feel offended and
to resent the intrusive advice or warning. Young
women, employ your pen, and breathe affection from
the female quill.
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FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.        187
I shall now lay down some RULES for the direction
of female activity, which must be very rigidly observed, in order to prevent it from doing harm in
one way as well as good in another.
The zeal of young women must ever be exercised
with the strictest regard to the modesty of youth,
and especially of youthful females. It must never
be forgotten that bashfulness is the beauty of female
character: like the violet, which seems to court seclusion, and indicates. its coy retreat rather by its
fragrance than its obtrusiveness of color or of place,
her very retiringness adds to her attractions. Any
thing that would destroy this-that would strip off
this delicate vail of modesty, and make her bold and
obtrusive; that would thrust her by an impulsive
ambition of her own mind upon the public notice,
instead of being sought out for usefulness; that
would make her clamorous in her complaints of
neglect, and imperious in her demands for employment-would inflict an irreparable injury on society
by depriving her of that passive power of gentleness
by which her influence can be most effectually exerted in society. I confess that with all my desires
for female activity within its proper sphere, and the
legitimate exercise of woman's zeal, I am made not
a little jealous by the active spirit of the age, and
the extent to which the sex is employed, for the delicate beauty and excellence of the female character.
Money might flow into the treasury of our societies,
and numbers might be added to their friends-spirit
might be given to our operations, and the triumphs
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\ 188      YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
of the cause might seem to be multiplied-but If
any injury were sustained by the female character,
all that was otherwise achieved would be accom.
plished at a dreadful cost and a fearful loss. Therefore I entreat you, my young friends, to guard
against this evil. Cultivate that meekness, gentleness, and retiringness, which are your brightest ornaments. Make it appear that in what you are
doing for God and his cause, you neither seek publicity, nor aim to attract attention, nor to court applause. Avoid all that undue familiarity, flippancy,
or trifling with the other sex, which would look as
if your object was rather to attract notice from them
than really to do good. I ask for nothing prim,
prudish, or repulsive; for no dread of converse with
men, or flight from their company, as if there were
moral contamination in their presence and pollution
in their words. Excessive prudery has not always
been associated with the highest-toned purity; nor
has an easy, artless frankness of manner been ever
the indication of a bold and forward disposition.
Still be reserved, without pride or coldness; and
frank, easy, and ingenuous, without familiarity and
obtrusiveness. In this age your danger lies in the
latter extreme'rather than in the former. Be contented that your influence should flow through society like the blood in the human frame, carrying life
and energy with it, but by channels where it is
neither heard nor seen.
Female zeal in religious matters must ever be
carried forward with due regard to the duties of home.




FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.        189
If, as 1 have stated, home be the sphere of woman's
mission, and the first and chief place of her duty,
no public objects of any kind must be allowed to
interfere with these. This I have already alluded
to, but on account of its importance I refer to it
again. It is not to the honor of religion, nor to the
credit of a wife and mother, for a husband to come
to his home at the dinner hour expecting to see
every thing ready and in order, and find all in confusion, nothing properly arranged, and then have his
time wasted by waiting for his wife, who has not
finished her benevolent rambles, or her morning's
activity at some female meeting. Nor is it much
for his happiness on coming home in the evening,
suffering from the fatigue and vexation of the world's
rough business, and when wanting the soothing influence of a wife's sweet voice, to have to sit hours
in sadness and solitude, because she is away at some
evening public meeting. This is not the way to
promote connubial felicity, nor to interest his mind
on behalf of the objects of his wife's zeal. It will
never do to serve the Lord with time taken from
domestic order, comfort, and family duty. A neglected husband and family are a sad comment upon
some women's religious activity: and it is a comment not unfrequently expressed by others who see
it in the appearance of the children and the house.
These are the instances, of which some who could
do much without infringing on domestic claims, but
who will do nothing, avail themselves to justify
their own selfishness and indolence, and I am sorry
_       _             __ L__           _




190        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
that such instances should ever be afforded te
them.. Still, a woman may look well to the ways of her
household, and some do, who by method, diligence,
and dispatch, set their house in order, and yet have
time t devote.to the cause of religion and humanity. Solomon's description of the virtuous woman
comprehends both these: " She looketh well to the
ways of her household. The heart of her husband
doth safely trust her, so that he shall have no need
of spoil. Her children rise up and call her blessed.
She giveth meat to her household, and a portion to
her maidens. She eateth not the bread of idleness."
Here is domestic order, management, economy, in
perfection. Yet with all th' is associated, "She
stretcheth out her hands to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy; and in her tongue
is the law of kindness." There the good housewife is supposed to find time for works of mercy
abroad, as well as of industry at home. Provided
the comfort of a husband is never neglected, and
he has no reason to complain, and does not complain of the want of his wife's society; and the
supervision of the children, as to their general wellbeing, and their education and home-training are
properly attended to; and also the whole course
of domestic order be maintained with regularity
and precision, it is to a Christian woman's honor
that her method of dispatch and order in the regulation of her household affairs is such as to leave her
ample time for usefulness, without the least infring




FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.        191
ing on her duties as a wife, a mother, or a mistress.
Except in the case of a large family, a destitution
of all public spirit is no credit to any female. She
can not be educating her family as she ought to
do, if she is not by her example as well as by her
precept training them to habits of benevolence.
The two extremes, then, are to be avoided-of
aNowing, on the one hand, the duties of home so
entirely to engross the female heart, as to feel no
interest in any thing that is going on in the world
for the alleviation of its sorrows, or the reformation
of its vices, and to cherish no desire to promote
the great objects of Christian zeal; and, on the
other hand, to allow them to occupy the attention
so far as to neglect the claims of husband, children,
and servants. The chief danger, in this age, lies in
giving too much attention to public duties, especially in the metropolis, the seat and centre of all
our great societies, and the place of their annual
convocation. It is not much to the credit of a
mother, nor for the advantage of her daughters, to
be too fond of taking them to many of these public gatherings. The month of May affords a strong
temptation to this, which should be most assiduously watched. It is not only lawful, but proper
and desirable, that our wives and daughters should
be present at these meetings. Who would debar
them from these assemblies, or shut them out from
these feasts of holy charity, or exclude them from
scenes in which they take as deep an interest, aiid
to which they have contributed equally with our.
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192         YOUNG WOMNAN'S FRIEND.
selves? Their sex is more benefitted by them
even than the opposite one. Let woman's hear.
there bleed over the woes of humanity, and especially of her down-trodden sisters in the lands
of darkness; let woman's hand be there stretched
out to lift them up fiom  their degradation, and
woman's eye there sparkle with a brighter lustei
as it rejoices over the records of our missions, and
the triumphs of Christianity. But, then, let not
this rise into such a passion as shall spoil her for
scenes partaking of less fascination in some respects, but to her of more importance in others.
In order to this, let our younger women in these
days of general benevolence guard against acquiring
in youth that taste for public activity which, though
it will not prevent them fiom entering into domestic life, would, to a very considerable extent, disqualify them for its duties. A love of activity is a
good; a passion for it would be an evil. There
is such a thing as well-regulated, temperate, religious zeal, and there is also such a thing as a species
of religious dissipation. When a young person
loves home and home duties, but is ever willing and
ready on suitable occasions, and for a proper object,
to leave it for works of religious and common benevolence, she is in a right disposition.  But when
home and home duties are irksome, and she is ever
longing for the excitement of public duties, her
taste has been corrupted, her character damaged,
and her prospects for future life become somewhat
beclouded. If she has abjured the intention or wish




FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.        193
ever to become a wife, and has, without entering a
convent, determined to be a sister of charity, it
may be all very well to desire to give herself
wholly to works of benevolent activity; but if not,
let her beware how she acquires predilections and
forms habits which would equally unfit and indispose her for the duties of wedded life.
Young females while at home should be generally
regulated by the wishes of their parents, and especially by their mothers. They are not, and should
neither wish nor attempt to be, independent of
parental control. A good and wise daughter will
ever look up with affectionate deference to a good
and wise mother, and will therefore enter on no
career of religious activity without consulting her.
It may be that the wishes of the child and the
opinions of the parent, on this point, are sometimes in opposition to each other, and it requires
little argument to prove which in this case ought
to give way. Perhaps some zealous, ardent, young
female will put such a question as this: "I feel it
my duty to God to attempt to spread religion, and
to do good to my fellow-creatures, and especially in
the way of saving their souls, but my parents, not
being themselves religious, oppose it, and will not
allow me either to engage in Sunday-school instruction, to collect for missionary or Bible societies, or
to go and distribute tracts, or to read the Scriptures
to the poor. Is it nry duty to follow out my own
convictions, or yield up my wishes to my parents?"
It would be very proper for you, in a respectful and
17




194        YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
deferential manner, to state your wishes, and use
every argument to obtain their compliance; but if
this should prove ineffectual, you must then submit
and bear the privation, without resentful sullenness.
To be moody, ill-tempered, and petulant under the
refusal, would too plainly indicate that you have
much yet to do in your own heart to spread religion there before you seek to communicate it to
others. You are under no such obligation to exercise your religious zeal in any particular way as
you are to seek your own salvation. It is mani-.
festly your duty to do good, and you can do it,
even under such restrictions as those I am now supposing; for you can set a holy example, and you can
pray for the spiritual welfare of others, and correspond with absent friends, and perhaps influence by
conversation your companions: and thus are not,
and can not be, shut out from all methods of doing
good; and as to those from which you are debarred
by parental authority, God will take the will for the
deed, and reward the intention, as he would have
done the action, had you been permitted to perform
it. Consider also that as your parents do not enter
into your views of religion, they will regard your
conduct, if you persist, in no other light than that
of a refractory spirit, and will thus receive a prejudice against religion on account of your conduct;
whereas a meek and good-natured yielding to their
wishes, and sacrificing an object which they perceive to have been near your heart, will dispose
thenmto think favorably of that religious principle




FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.        195
which could produce such a spirit of unresisting and
uncomplaining self-denial.
In order to be useful, it is necessary to cultivate
habits of order, punctuality, and the right appropriation of time. These remarks apply, of course, to
such as move in the wealthier circles of life, and
whose opportunities of doing good are not confined
to the Sabbath. Week-days with them should be
working-days for God and man, by the offices of
religion and humanity. There is no doing good
without time. Benevolence requires leisure. Two
things can not be done at once. How much time
is wasted, which the miseries and wants of society
require.*  "Time is the most undefinable; yet paradoxical of things; the past is gone, the future is
not come, and the present becomes the past, even
while we attempt to define it, and like the flash of
the lightning, at once exists and expires. Time is
the measurer of all things, but is itself irnmeasurable, and the grand discloser of all things, but is
itself undisclosed. Like space, it is incomprehensible, because it has no limit, and it would be still
more so, if it had. It is more obscure in its source
than the Nile, and in its termination than the Niger,
and advances like the slowest tide, but retreats like
the swiftest torrent. It gives wings of lightning to
pleasure, but feet of lead to pain, and lends expectation a curb, but enjoyment a spur. It robs beauty
* Perhaps the following very striking antithetical description of time will amuse and instruct many of the readers of this discourse.
- - *- - - - - - - - - -. —------------------—. ___ ~,1




196        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
3f her charms, to bestow them on her picture, and
builds a monument to merit, but denies it a house;
it is the transient and deceitful flatterer of falsehood,
but the tried and final friend of truth. Time is the
most subtle, yet the most insatiable of depredators,
and by appearing to take nothing, is permitted to
take all, nor can it be satisfied, until it has stolen
the world fiom us, and us from the world. It constantly flies, yet overcomes all things by flight, and
although it is the present ally, it will be the future
conqueror of death. Time, the cradle of hope, but
the grave of ambition, is the stern corrector of fools,
but the salutary counselor of the wise, bringing all
they dread to the one, and all they desire to the
other; but like Cassandra, it warns us with a voice
that even the sagest discredit too long, and the
silliest believe too late. Wisdom walks before it,
opportunity with it, and repentance behind it; he
that has made it his friend, will ha've little to fear
from his enemies; but he that has made it his enemy, will have little to hope from his friends."
Redeem the time, is a voice that ought ever to be
sounding in our ears. We want it for our own
improvement, and we want it for the good of others.
We can do much with it, but nothing without it.
There is scarcely any thing to which the injunction
of our Lord more strictly applies than to this" Gather up the fragments, that nothing be lost."
Order redeems time-so does punctuality; therefore, order and punctuality are among the means
of mercy and zeal, by supplying the time necessary




FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.        197
for their exercise.  Redeem  time from  useless
reading, and also from that excessive addictedness
to the accomplishments of music, drawing, modern
languages, and fancy work, which is so characteristic of the present day. That some portion of time
may be given by females in wealthy circles to these
things, is admitted. We are not for parting with
even the exquisite polish which skill in these matters imparts to female elegance. We love to see
even the decorations of female mind and manners.
Of the one, I may have to speak again in a future
discourse, and therefore shall merely now say, that
when the cries of misery are entering into her ears,
and the groans of creation are-rising all around her;
when such countless millions abroad are living and
dying without the light of the gospel and the hope
of salvation; when at her own doors will be found
so many passing in ignorance and wickedness to
their great account; is it for a humane, and especially for a religious young woman to spend so
much precious time each day over her knitting,
crotchet, or embroidery-work? As she sits plying
those needles, and bringing out, it may be, the
tasteful device hour after hour, does she never hear
the plaint of human woe, "Come over and help
us?" Does it never occur to her, how many souls
have gone into eternity unprepared to meet their
God since she took her chair and commenced her
daily task? Or, even leaving out of view, for a
moment, the employment of her time for deeds of
religious zeal, is it not an afflictive sight to behold
17*




198        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
so much time thrown away on these elegant trifles,
which might be so much better employed in cultivating the mind by useful reading? You can not
do good, then, without making some sacrifices of
time, which might be agreeably, if not very profitably, spent on matters of taste.
Permit me now to remind you that all youi
efforts of religious zeal should be carried on in a
spirit offaith and prayer. It should not be merely
the love of activity, much less an ambitious fondness for publicity and display, that moves you;
but a strong and prevailing feeling of love to God
and love to man. It must not be a substitute for
religion, but the impulse and the constraining power
of it. Instead of weakening your own piety, it
must strengthen it. Emanating from your own
holy mind, it must, like the newly-kindled flame,
act back upon its source and increase the intensity
of that. You must be watchful.over your own
spirit, and take care that your humility and spirituality be not impaired by a spirit of vanity. You
should look well to your motives, and subject your
heart to a most rigid self-scrutiny. In the retirement of the closet you should cultivate that spirit
of dependence which expresses itself in prayer, and
is cherished by prayer. The more you do for the
spiritual welfare of others, the more you must do
for your own. You should take alarm if you find
that the excitements of zeal produce an indisposedness for the more retired and quiet exercises of devotion. A renewed consecration to your work
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _   _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _   I




FEMALE RELIGIOUS ZEAL.        199
should often take place, preceded by a renewed
consecration of yourselves to God.
To encourage you in your career of holy activity,
I may call you, in conclusion, to consider the nature
of your work, and the consequences that will follow
even your humble endeavors to carry it on. It is
religion, the gift of God to man, which Jesus Christ
came to our world to bring with him, which the
Spirit of God is poured out to produce, and the
Scriptures are written to describe and impart; it is
religion, the balm of man's wounded heart, the
renovator of his corrupt nature, the means of his
happiness, his preparation for immortal glory; it is
religion, the source of individual comfort, domestic
peace, social order, national prosperity, and the
whole world's restoration; it is religion, which shall
cover our earth with the glories of the Millennium,
and raise up countless millions of our race from the
ruins of the fall to the heavens of the eternal God;
it is religion, that shall be the glory and the bliss
of the redeemed church throughout eternity; it is
religion, in the cause of which prophets predicted,
apostles labored, martyrs bled, ministers labor at
home, and missionaries abroad; it is this you are
promoting by all your efforts of religious zeal. In
this cause you shall not labor in vain, nor without
your reward, for " the earth shall be full of the
knowledge of the Lord, as the waters cover the
sea;" and your humble labors, though as drops in
that mighty ocean, fall there and help to replenish
the mighty mass-and after this shall come the
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200         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
world where you shall be gathered unto those holy
women whose lives were briefly recorded in a past
sermon; and to all those chaste virgins and holy
matrons, who have wrought to weave by their
labors the crown of glory which shall ever flourish
on the head of our Emmanuel.




Ql}e tOnug Wnmnn nit unm.
"Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this
is right. Honor thy father and mother; which is the
first commanadment with promise."-EPHESIANS vi. 1, 2.
" It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a
contentious and an angry woman."-PROVERBS xxi 19.
" Be kindly affectioned one to another."-RoM, xii. 10.
IT was the saying of a judicious governess to a
pupil just quitting her establishment, " Be assured,
my young friend, that the order, comfort, and happiness of a family, very greatly depend upon the
temper and conduct of the younger members of it,
when they cease to be children. I have seen the
declining years of some kind parents completely
embittered by the pride, self-will, and inconsiderate
conduct of their young people. When a young
lady returns home, if she is not so good a daughter
as she was before, whatever acquisitions she may
have made at school, she had better never have
been there."
This advice, so sensible and so appropri ite, not
only shows how well-qualified was the admirable
woman who proffered it for the discharge of her
duties, but is well worthy of being written in the




202         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
first page of every young woman's album; yea,
upon the tablet of her heart, and to be read every
day of her residence in her father's house.
It has been said, we are all really what we are
relatively. Akin to this, we may add, every one
is best known at home. Many people not only
dress their person, but their character, when they
go into company, till it has become almost a current saying, "Tell me not what they are in company, but what they are in the family circle."
Home, as we have already said in a former discourse, is one of the sweetest words in our language;
and nowhere better understood than in our own
country. But it involves as many duties as it does
enjoyments. It is not only a paradise of delights,
but a school of virtue. A family is a little world
within doors: the miniature resemblance of the
great world without. It is in the home of her parents that a young female is trained for the future
home of her own; andy generally speaking, what
she was in the former, that, in full maturity and
expansion, she will be in the latter-the good wife,
and judicious mother, looking well to the ways of
her household, being the full-blown rose of which
the good girl, at home, was the bud of promise
and of hope. And it may be depended upon as a
principle, suggested by reason, as well as a fact
corroborated by observation, that she who contributes nothing to the happiness of her early home, as
a daughter, is not likely to find others contributing
to her later one as a wife, a mother, and a mistress.




THE YOUNG WOMAN AT HOME.       203
It is, therefore, of immense importance that you
should, at once, at the very commencement of this
discourse, pause and ponder the momentous truth,
that you are preparing your own future home by
the manner in which you conduct yourself in that
of your father; and because of its importance it is
thus dwelt upon with such repetition.
In one aspect, the subject of this sermon is of
more consequence, in reference to you, than it is in
reference to your brothers; you remain longer at
home than they. It is the usual order of things
for them to remove early from beneath the parental
roof, first to learn, and then to pursue, their avocations in life; so that if their temper be unamiable,
and their habits unfriendly to domestic peace, they
soon depart, and bear away the annoyance. But
you, if not necessitated to go out into a situation
for your own support, remain with your parents
till you are married, and if not wedded, you are
with them continually. In the latter case you are
a fixture in the household, and should therefore be
a happy one. Of how much comfort or disquiet,
according to her character and conduct, may a
daughter be to a family through a period of ten or
twenty years, dating from the period of her return
from school. Hence it is always a source, not of
unmixed delight, but of some anxiety, to a considerate mother, what kind of home character her child
will prove when she has finished her education, and
exchanges the company of her governess and fellow-pupils for that of the family circle.




204        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
Here, then, is the first thing, the great thing to
be determined upon by the young woman at home,
to be a large contributor to the happiness of the
domestic circle. You can not be a cipher in the
house, nor sustain a negative character. You are a
member of the little community, and the other
members must be affected by your conduct. You
are ever in the midst of them, and your actions,
words, and very looks, exert an influence upon
them.  Behold, then, your starting-point in the
career of home duties.  Take up this resolution
intelligently, deliberately, determinately: "I WILL,
BY GOD'S GRACE, DO ALL I CAN TO MAKE MY HOME
HAPPY TO OTHERS, AND TIUS COMFORTABLE TO MYSELF." Look at this resolution, revolve it, imprint
it on-your memory, heart, conscience. Is it not
wise, virtuous, right? Does not reason, conscience,
self-love approve it? Let it be a serious matter of
consideration with you, and not merely a thought
passing through the mind, and leaving no trace behind, but a deep, abiding, influential consideration.
Have not your parents a right to expect it? Is it
not the most reasonable thing in the world, that
enjoying the protection and comforts of home, you
should in return make home happy?
To diffuse happiness anywhere is a blissful employment, but most of all, at home. To light up
any countenances with joy is to a benevolent mind
a desirable thing, but most of all the countenances
of parents, and brothers, and sisters. Set out with
the intense ambition to compel from the whole




THE YOUNG WOMAN AT HOME.       205
family circle the testimony that it was a happy era
in the domestic history when you came permanently
to reside at home. O to hear a mother say, " Thy 
coming, my daughter, was as the settlement of a
ministering angel among us-thy amenities of temper, thy constant efforts to please, thy sweet and
gentle self-sacrificing disposition, have been a lamp
in our dwelling, in the light of which we have all
rejoiced! What a large accession, my beloved
child, hast thou brought to our domestic felicity!
Receive thy mother's thanks and blessing!" A
harder heart than yours, my young friends, might
be moved by such a hope as this. Contemplate
now the contrast to this, when the conduct of a
daughter is such as to extort such a declaration as
the following from sorrowing parents: " We looked
forward with pleasure and with hope, not altogether
unmixed with anxiety, to the time when we should
receive her back from school, to be our companion
and our comfort. How bitter is our disappointment! Her unamiable disposition, her regardlessness of our happiness, her restlessness in the family
circle, her craving for any company but ours, are
painfully obvious. It was-we regret to say it-a
sad increase of our domestic trouble, when she became a permanent inmate of our house."  Sighs
and tears follow this sad confession. Which of
these shall be the case with you, my young friends 
Can you hesitate?
Having, then, made up your mind to be a comfort at home, you should, and will, of course, inquire
18




206         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
into the means of accomplishing your purpose.
These will, if the purpose be fixed, and the desire
intense, almost without enumeration, suggest themselves. They who really want to make others
happy, will find out their own means of doing so,
and be ingenious in their devices to effectuate the
end. Many things are difficult, and require deep
thought, but not the study to please. If our heart
be set upon it, we can diffuse bliss almost without
effort or contrivance. Forn a heart fully possessed
with the desire to make others happy, kind acts and
offices will flow off, like the ebullitions of a spring
or the streams of a fountain, without the labor of
drawing or purifying the water.
But we will, for your guidance, lay down rules
for that behavior at home, which will enable you
to make large contributions to the felicity of the
family.
Should your parents themselves be truly pious
people, who have trained you up in the fear of the
Lord; their deepest solicitude and most earnest
prayer for you is, that you may " Remember your
Creator in the days of your youth."  You have
been the witnesses of some of their anxiety on this
ground, and for this object. You have heard a
father's prayers, have seen, perhaps, a mother's
tears for your salvation; but of the whole of their
concern on this point you never can know. It is
too deep for you to fathom. Till this great subject
is determined, till they see you in earnest to lead
a pious life, they can not be happy. They value




THE YOUNG WOMAN AT HOME.        207
your love, your respect, your attentions to their
comfort, your general good conduct, your acquisitions, and not unfrequently feel a parent's pride
over you; but, "Alas, alas!" they say, "one thing
thou lackest yet, and that is, the one thing needful-true piety-the salvation of the soul. Oh, my
daughter, that thou wast a real Christian; and that
thy love to Christ was as sincere as thy love to
me; and that all thy other excellences were sanctified by the crowning one of true religion!"  What 
a check is such a reflection to the joy of a Christian
parent. How many hours of bitterness such reflections occasion! What an interruption to the
bliss of a family does it occasion when there is a
difference of taste on this most momentous of all
subjects. How is a mother's heart grieved to see
her daughters, after all the pains she has taken with
them to form their religious character, more taken
up with fashion, company, and gayety, than with
eternal realities! And that good man, the father,
how is he distressed to see his counsels unheeded,
his prayers unanswered, and they whom he had
hoped to lead to the altar of God, far more fond of
the gay ceremonial of the world. On the other
hand, how happy are those parents whose children
are one with them in this momentous concern.
How sweet and sacred are the seasons of family
worship, when, not by constraint, but willingly, the
children assemble round the domestic altar, and
join in the sacrifice of prayer and praise. No jars
and discords now arise for the want of sympathy in




208        YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
these great subjects.  No opposition of tastes
occurs-no clashing of interests. Often and often
does the mother exclaim in the fondness of her
heart, "Thank God, that dear girl is a Christian,
and adds to all her other excellences which endear
her to my heart, sincere piety toward God! The
beauties of holiness invest her charms with a loveliness that nothing else can impart."
In order to make home happy, there must be a
proper consideration and right discharge of all the
duties you owe tu the various members of the little
community of which it is composed.
First of all, there are the PARENTS. That home
can not be a happy one where these are neglected,
and filial duty is wanting in the heart and conduct
of the children. God has selected the most comprehensive term that could be employed on this
subject. " Honor thy father and mother"-this
includes respect, love, and, obedience. I have not
time nor is it necessary here to state the claims
which parents have upon your gratitude, reverence,
and regard. I can only remind you how much of
the happiness of home depends upon a right understanding and discharge of the duties you owe to
them. When a father's heart is wounded by disobedient conduct, or even disrespectful language;
when a mother's comfort is neglected, and her
burdens are unshared; when it is apparent that
children are much more intent upon their own
gratification than that of their parents; when services are rendered tardily, reluctantly, and with ill



THE YOUNG WOMAN AT HOME.        209
nature; when complaint is uttered on one part, only
to be answered by impertinence on the otherhappiness must be a stranger in such a home. Disobedience in young children, in whom reason and
reflection are yet feeble, is bad enough, but far
worse in those who are grown, or growing to years
of maturity. On the other hand, if it be beautiful
to see the tender assiduities and affectionate attentions of childhood, which are rather the efforts of
instinct than of reason, it is a far more attractive
scene to witness the reverent regard, the studious
desire to please, the anxious effort to gratify, manifested toward her parents by a grown-up daughter.
Here the intelligent mind is moved by the affectionate heart, and the affectionate heart is, in return,
guided and impelled by the intelligent mind.
Have your parents been less educated than you,
and at the same time have spared no expense to
afford you advantages which they did not possess,
how ungrateful would it be in you by any part of
your conduct to display your superiority and make
them conscious of their ignorance.
Before a mother's infirmities reach the point of
actual incompetency, a good daughter will feel solicitous to share with her the burden of domestic care,
and to relieve her as far as possible from her load
of maternal duty. This requires caution, lest by
an officious obtrusion of help, it should be suspected
she was desirous of thrusting the mother from her
superintendence, and of stepping into her place. It
can never fail to wound a mother's heart to be sup.
18*




210         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
posed to be incompetent for her place as female
head of the family. Even when imbecility is creeping on, she should be made to feel it as little as
possible, and the forms and show of authority be
suffered to remain, when the power has passed
away. Jealousy is one of the last passions that die
in the human heart, and it should not be awakened
by any part of filial conduct in the mind of a parent.
A wife, mother, and mistress, deposed by her own
daughter, is a painful sight. She may have much
weakness, but still enough of reflection remains to
make her feel her humiliation. Therefore, young
women, in aiding a mother, for which you ought to
be ever in readiness, do not attempt to wrest the
Keys from her keeping, but only employ them
under her direction. For this be ever ready. It
is to me one of the most lovely scenes on earth to
see a young woman risen up to be the companion
and helper of her mother, placing herself by her
side, and foregoing many an invitation and opportunity of personal enjoyment to relieve her solitude,
to lighten her cares, or to minister to her comfort.
Your object, then, should be to share a mother's
labor, without superseding her authority; and to
assist her in a way so tender and so delicate as
shall neither awaken her suspicion that you wish to
supplant her, nor make her feel that she is incapable
of doing without you.
To these duties all should be attentive, but esperially those daughters who make a profession of
religion. Many who hear and many who will read




THE YOUNG WOMAN AT HOME.       211
this"sermon are happily in this state; and to them
would I most earnestly and affectionately say, " Let
your light shine" at home, that its inmates " seeing
your good works, may glorify God your Heavenly
Father." Let it be most impressively and con.
stantly felt by you, and let it be seen by others
that you feel that religion is no abstract thing of
times, places, and occasions; but an element of
general character, which is to enter into all relations,
all duties, and all engagements. It must improve
us in every thing, spreading like'a gilded surface
over our whole selves and all our conduct, and
shining like a beautiful polish on every other excellence. It must make you a better daughter in
every respect, more respectful, more kind, more
devoted to your parents, and compel them to say,
"Happy day when she became a Christian, for
from that hour she became a lovelier and more
loving child!"
It may be that in some cases your parents are
not truly converted to God. This places you in a
difficult and delicate situation, and will require the
utmost solicitude, care, and prayer, that you may be
prevented from doing or being any thing that would
prejudice them against religion; and that you may
be enabled on the contrary so to conduct yourself
as to prepossess them in its favor. You must affect
no superiority, nor even seem to say, "Stand by, I
am holier than thou." This is improper to any
one, much more to a parent. You can pray for
them, and you can exhibit to them, by  our ex.




212         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
ample invested with all the beauties of holiness,
what religion is; but direct efforts to bring them
under its influence, though these should not be
altogether withheld, should be conducted with the
greatest tenderness, humility, modesty, and delicacy. There must be no lecturing, much less any
reproach or accusation. A deep, tender, loving
solicitude for their spiritual welfare must be seen
vailed with modesty, but still seen, penetrating the
transparent and graceful covering; a solicitude,
which only now and then presumes to speak; but
when it does, always in love. Such a line of conduct may accomplish its purpose, and produce
results like the following:
"A  female, who had been some years known
and respected for her quiet, consistent, unobtrusive
Christian deportment, called on her minister, to introduce her aged mother, who leaned on her arm,
and seemed to repose on her that tender dependence which is so soothing and delightful to an aged
parent, and so heart-thrilling to a dutiful and grateful child. Both were overcome by their feelings,
and it was some moments before either could speak.
The minister desired them to be seated, and cheerfully said:'Well, Hannah, I suppose this is your
good mother-I am very happy to see her.''Yes,'
replied the mother, in broken accents,'her mother,
and her daughter too. Five and twenty years ago
I bore her in infancy; and now, through her instrumentality, I trust I am born to God.'"
Mr. Jay relates a similar anecdote. "'Well,'




THE YOUNG WOMAN AT HOME.        213
said a mother, one day, weeping (her daughter
being proposed as a candidate for Christian communion),'I will resist no longer.  How can I
bear to see my dear child love and read the Scriptures, while I never look into the Bible-to see her
retire and seek God, while I never pray-to see her
going to the Lord's table, while his death is nothing
to me2'' Ah,' said she to the minister who
called to inform her of her daughter's desire, wiping her eyes,'yes, sir, I know she is right, and I
am wrong; I have seen her firm under reproach,
and patient under provocation, and cheerful in all
her sufferings. When, in her late illness, she was
looking for dissolution, heaven stood in her face.
Oh, that I was as fit to die! I ought to have taught
her, but I am sure she has taught mle. How can I
bear to see her joining the church of God, and leaving me behind-perhaps forever?'    From   that
hour she prayed in earnest that the God of her
child would be her God, and was soon seen walking
with her in the way everlasting."
But there are, in most cases, other members of
the household besides the parents-the BROTHERS
and SISTERS-who also require attention and right
conduct from "The Young Woman at Home."     A
loving, united, harmonious family, I repeat again,
where, while the children are all devoted to the
comfort of their parents and of one another; where
each is studious to perform all kind offices, and to
please the rest, and all seek the happiness of each,
is one of the loveliest scenes to be found in our di.




214        YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
vided and discordant world. Dr. Watts has taught
us this from our childhood:
"Whatever brawls disturb the street,
There should be peace at home."
Much, very much, depends upon the daughters for
this domestic harmony. They can exert, if prudent,
good-tempered, and obliging, a softening influence
over the minds and manners of their brothers. A
sisterly affection, judiciously displayed, is one of the
sweetest and most powerful ingredients in the cup
of domestic enjoyment. True it is, that it will
require occasionally some little self-denial, and
sacrifice of personal gratification, predilection, and
feeling, to conciliate the affection, and secure the
good-will of brothers, who are apt to begin too soon
to feel that they are " the lords of the creation;"
and thus to keep the peace of the family. But a
girl of good sense and affectionate disposition will
go a great way in this direction. Woman is made
to yield, though not to be trampled upon. Her
gentle nature is formed for submission, rather than
for resistance. A good and wise sister will feel
this, and her very affection will, in most cases, be
her protection. Let her put forth the thousand
little arts of ingenuousness, of which she is, or may
be mistress, and throw the silken cords of love over
her brothers' hearts, and she may do much to attach, and in some cases even to subject them to
her, and make them fond of home. A husband is
but too apt to run away from the home which is




THE YOUNG WOMAN AT HOME.        215
tenanted by an ill-natured wife; and brothers have
been often driven away to company, by cross, sullen, unaccommodating sisters. I am aware that it
is but too frequently the case, that young men are
polite and attentive to every female but those they
every day meet at home, and scarcely any one has
to complain of a want of civility and complaisance
but their sisters. At the same time it must be confessed, that some young women have themselves to
blame for this, for it does require more virtue than
is ordinarily found, to be very much attached and attentive to such an impersonation of pettishness, illhumor, and vanity, as some silly girls present at
home. How many parents' comfort is disturbed,
and their hearts half-broken, by the jealousies, envies, and contentions of their children.
The elder daughter, especially if she be older
than her brothers, also has a larger share of responsibility attaching to her than belongs to any other
of the children, just because her influence is greater
than any other. She does almost as much to form
the character of the younger branches as the mother, and when the latter is feeble and inefficient,
perhaps more. It is a lovely sight to behold an
intelligent and affectionate girl, yet not authoritative or dictatorial, exerting a plastic power over
her younger brothers and sisters, setting them a
beautiful example of filial piety, and lending all her
efforts to uphold parental authority over them,
conciliating their confidence by her judgment, and
their affection by her kindness-throwing a softening




216        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND. 
and gentle influence over their ruder and harsher
natures, and compelling the parents to say, "She
is a second mother to the family."  Ye senior
daughters, behold your pattern! 
The SERVANTS must not be left out of consideration. These add much, very much, to the comfort
or disquiet of families; and they are considerably
influenced, not only by the conduct of the parents,
but by that of the children. Were I speaking to
young men, I should remind them of the distance,
without pride-the kindness, without familiaritythe purity in thought, word and deed, which is
incumbent in all their conduct-which is necessary
to be observed in their conduct-toward female
servants. But I am speaking to young women, and
therefore remind them that the three things to be
practiced are kindness, considerateness and confidence;
and the three to be avoided are haughtiness, oppression, and familiarity. A young woman displays
considerable littleness of minq, as well as forgetfulness of the laws of God, when she treats a
servant with scorn and contempt, as being of an
inferior nature. Perhaps, at the same time, that
servant may have not only a finer form and a
stronger mind, but a holier heart and a diviner
taste, than she who treats her with supercilious
disesteem.  In every thing the servant may be
superior except in rank. Nor is this the only kind'
of ill-treatment that servants are sometimes doomed
to bear from their young mistress, and, alas! sometimes at the cognizance of their old mistress too.




THE YOUNG WOMAN AT HOME.       217
Women of high rank and title are brought up with
the notion, and the practice also, that they are to do
nothing for themselves, and they are usually provided with a waiting-maid to do every thing for
them; to whom her place would be a sinecure, if
her mistress did any thing for herself. But for
others in the middle life to be brought up in helplessness, is a discredit to the mother, an injury to
the daughter, and generally a cruelty to those who
are called to minister to them. Such a system of
aping the manners of the nobility, where there are
scarcely means to command help for the ordinary
duties of a tradesman's household, is indeed contemptible. Mothers, I speak to you. Train your
daughters, not to be fine and helpless ladies, but to
be useful wives, mothers, and mistresses. Be yourselves patterns in these things, and propose the
pattern for the imitation of your daughters. See
to it, that they learn to help themselves in all
proper matters, and do not allow them to press too
hard upon the energies of your servants. Much
will depend upon you in this matter. And do you,
my young female friends, enter warmly and wisely
into this subject yourselves. Do not affect the fine
lady, or wish to be only a kind of dressed doll, to
be carried about and played with by others. I do
not ask you to do any thing to demean yourselves
below your rank and station, or any thing that
would degrade you in the eyes of the servants
themselves; but still be ambitious to grow up in a
state of independence, and in a preparedness to make
19




218         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
your way through life, even against difficulties and
privations, should you be called to meet with them.
Your own happiness, as well as the comfort of the
servants, demands you should be as considerate and
give as little trouble as possible. It was certainly
a happy invention for mistresses when bell-hanging
was invented, but a great misery for some servants,
in whose ears the jingle of the parlor or bed-room
bell is ever going. "What," says many a thoughtless young woman, " were servants given for but to
wait upon us?"'  And what were young limbs
given you for but to wait upon yourselves? It
would do some young persons good, if for one year,
at least, they were without a servant at all, and had
every thing to do for themselves. How much better, how much nobler than this inconsiderateness,
is the kindness which not only avoids giving trouble,
but that, also, which leads a young woman, in addition to attending to her general comfort, to teach a
servant to read and write, and to take the oversight
of her education in things important for her to know,
especially the subject of personal religion.
But there is another thing on which a few remarks
should be made, and that is, the undue familiarity
which young women sometimes contract with
female servants. Kindness, to whatever extent it
may and should be carried, and whatever offices it
leads to, does not imply companionship: a good
and wise servant will not wish it, and knows her
place too well to make the attempt. It is only she
whose mind is as artful as that of her young mistress




THE YOUNG WOMAN AT HOME.        219
is weak, that will seek to gain ascendancy over her,
and to become her confidante. " A young lady,"
says Mrs. Copley, " would very much degrade and
injure herself by choosing to make a servant, however respectable, her familiar associate, the vehicle
of gossip or scandal, the partner in her jokes, the
confidante of her affairs. Such intimacies are most
prejudicial, disgraceful, and perilous. Many a young
lady, who thought it no harm to listen to the flattering tales of an artful servant, about her beauty
and her conquests, has been led on to receive from
her hands the seductive letter, to fall in with her
contrivance for clandestine interviews, and at length
to complete a marriage without the knowledge or
approbation of her parents, and in its results ruinous
to herself. Where things have not been carried
on to this disastrous extremity, much levity and
imprudence have resulted from such unprofitable'
and unsuitable intimacies, which have occasioned
unpleasant reports and surmises at the time, and
have formed matter of painful reflection in the mind
of the individual, long after the connection has been
dissolved, and the danger escaped."
I now suggest some other matters, partially implied in what we have already advanced, but of
sufficient importance to be brought out into full
view. Among these must be mentioned AMIABILITY:
in other words, that sweetness of temper which is ever
seeking to please, and to avoid whatever would
offend. There is a\saying, that " Temper is every
thing." This is going too far, since there is no doubt




220         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
a good temper is sometimes associated with bad
principle; while on the other hand, there are many
high-principled and noble-minded individuals, who
are troubled, equally to their own annoyance and
that of their friends, with infirmities of temper.
Still, though not every thing, good temper is a great
thing. No doubt very much depends in this matter upon our physical organization, for we see the
same difference in the brute creation that we observe in the human species. But this, though an explanation, is not an apology: because reason and
religion may do much, and in myriads of instances
have done much, to correct and improve a disposition naturally bad. Begin life, then, young women,
with a deep impression of the value of good temper,
both to your own happiness and to that of the persons with whom you have to do, especially the
family circle.  Study your own temper.  Know
well what it is you have to contend with in your
own case, and set yourselves most diligently to subdue it. Be mistress of your temper. Bad temper
is a generic phrase, of which there are several
species-as, for instance, there is a peevishness or
petulance about some persons which makes them
susceptible of offense, not of either a very deep or
passionate kind, but an irritability which disposes
them to be hurt at little things, and to complain of
the conduct of others, rather than to have their resentment excited. Then there is the violent temper,
which is excited by some supposed or real offense
to sudden ebullitions of wrath, sometimes even to a
I_________________




THE YOUNG WOMAN AT HOME.         221
storm, or what we call being in a passion. There
is also the sullen disposition, which, on being contradicted, opposed, or reproved, sinks into a silent,
moody, and inwardly resentful state of mind. Persons of this turn will sulk for hours, if not days;
retiring into themselves, they will brood over the
matter which has occasioned this unhappy state, till
they have actually made themselves ill by their bad
temper; and yet, if expostulated with, will assert
they are not ill-tempered, but only "hurt." This is
the disposition which, more than any thing else, is
an itcerruption to domestic peace. I am no apologist for stormy passions, or for those that indulge
them, but those who are soon in a blaze, and
as soon cooled down, and the fire extinguished, are
not so inimical to the peace of a family, as they in
whose heart the embers of ill-will are kept long
smouldering under the ashes, and not suffered to
go out. But besides these, there are other varieties
of temper which are sadly iniimical to domestic
peace. There is the selish disposition, which leads
its possessor ever to be seeking to concentrate the
regards of the family upon herself, especially if
subject to indisposition. All must bend to her,
and every hand be employed by her. Her will
must be consulted in every thing, and her comfort
be the study of all. She must engross the affection
of the parents, the regard of the brothers and sisters, and the time, attention, and labor of the
servants. This is sometimes fostered by injudicious
parents, who excite the envy and jealousy of the




222        YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
other branches of the family, by this exaction from
all for the sake of the one. True, where there is
much indisposition, the sufferer should be, and
usually is, the center of sympathetic attention; but
where the ailments are slight, and especially where
the patient is apt to exaggerate them, she should
not be petted into an engrossing and exacting
selfishness; but should be gently taught to have a
little regard to the comfort of others. In addition
to these, there is the jealous and envious disposition,
which contends not only for pre-eminenc, but for
monopoly; which accounts as a rival every one
who receives the least special notice, and dislikes
her on that account. What petty passions of this
kind often creep into families, and poison all the
springs of domestic happiness. Consider how much
the tempers of its members have to do with the
peace of a household-how much of sunshine one
sweet and lovely disposition, constantly in exercise,
may throw over a household; and on the other
hand, how much of cloud, and gloom, and storm,
one passionate, sullen, selfish, or envious temper
may bring over the little community at home.
My young friends, begin life with a deep conviction-and you can not have it too deep-of the importance of this subject. A bad temper will torment you through life. With this, you will carry
/our own curse with you everywhere. It will
multiply your enemies, and alienate your friends;
it will becloud your reason, and hinder your relig.
ion; it will embitter your comforts, and envenom




THE YOUNG WOMAN AT HOME.        223
your trials; it will make you unhappy at home
and procure for you distress from home; it will
give you wretchedness at the time, and conscious
guilt and painful reflections afterward; it will deprive your days of peace, and your nights of sleep;
in short, a bad temper will be to the soul what a
chronic and painful disease is to the body-a constant source of uneasiness and distress-with this
difference, that whereas the former is a visitation
from God, the latter is our own doing; and while
one to the Christian brings its own consolation with it,
the other brings nothing but punishment and shame.
To make home happy, you must, of course, be
conformed to its general rules. This, perhaps, it is
less necessary to insist upon in reference to you,
than it is to your brothers, because you are less in
danger than they of infringing upon domestic order.
Every well-regulated family has its laws and customs, its times and seasons, its government and
authority. These must be observed, if the little
community be kept in order and good condition.
I will suppose it is a pious family, where God is
worshiped, and the morning and evening sacrifice
are duly offered upon the domestic altar. At the
appointed hour, all ought to be present. Nothing
can be more unseemly than to see one member
after another come dropping in whila the Scriptures
are being read, as if the Bible were only the prayerbell to call the family together for worship. I have
often witnessed this, and have heard the objurgaticn
of the father to his dilatory children, whose want




224         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
of punctuality had been occasioned only by a
wretched, slothful habit of lying late in bed. It
has really in some cases given rise to domestic
quarrels. Much the same remark will apply to
other matters. The father of a family may see
reason to object to the late hours of the present
day, and may request that all his household shall
be at home by a certain hour of the evening. It
may be thought by his children he is too precise —
too antiquated in his notions-too inconsiderate of
their gratification-but still it is his law; he' is
master of his house, and they are his subjects, who
are to obey. It is quite unseemly for the children
to be ever maintaining a struggle against paternal
rule and maternal counsel. On the contrary, it is
the glory and the praise of a good and dutiful child
to find what sacrifices of feeling and gratification
she can submit to, rather than commit herself to a
struggle with parental rule and domestic government. On the other hand, parents should be very
careful not to make their yoke oppressive, and their
burden heavy. The laws of the family should not
be too stringent, nor the authority of the parent
tyrannical, capricious, and unnecessarily precise.
But they must be obeyed as long as they last, and
the elder branches of the family, where there are
younger ones, should excel in leading them, both by
example and precept, to this habitual conformity to
household law.
If you would make home happy, you must, of
course, be happy at home. No one can diffuse joy




THE YOUNG WOMAN AT HOME.        225
who is not joyful. The passions are infectious, be.
cause the heart is sympathetic. Cheerful persons
make others so, and so does the gloomy one, just
as the sun irradiates by his beams, or the clouds
darken by their shadow, the whole landscape. A
young person whose heart finds its resting-place in
the domestic circle; whose sympathies are with
household scenes; whose chosen companions are
her parents, and her brothers, and sisters; whose
pleasures are the sweet interchanges of domestic
offices and affections; whose loved employment it
is to make her daily contribution to the comfort of
the little community within doors; and whose goodhumored disposition radiates fiom smiling eyes,
and flows from gently-curled lips-such an inmate
is a blessing to the house in which she dwells.
The soft music of her speech, aided by the genial
influence of her accommodating and insinuating
temper, sheds a benign influence on all the family.
But observe the opposite to all this-the girl that
looks round upon her home as a prison rather than
a paradise, and seems to think that to stay at home
is a penance rather than a pleasure; from all which
she is anxious to escape, and is ever seeking opportunities to effect her purpose. Her gloomy aspect,
her sullen disposition, her discontented air, her repulsive taciturnity, her peevish expressions, when
she does break silence, her unsympathizing isolation-what a member of the family is this! She
has there no associates, no objects of strong affection, nothing to engage and interest her heart; but




226         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
is ever seeking occasions to slip away, upon any
pretense, or into any engagement. She is ever on
the watch for opportunities or excuses for absence;
ready for any errand; eager for every business
that opens the door for her egress. She is not
happy but in a continual round of parties, visits,
or out-of-door novelties, of which this fertile age is
so prolific. Any society, rather than that of the
family, and any scenes rather than those of home,
suit her taste. Can such a young person make
home happy? Yes, if a specter can do it-for
such, or little better, is she. Young people, I repeat, be happy at home. Parents, put forth all
your ingenuity to make them so, by investing home
with its proper attractions. Mothers, this devolves
much on you. Be you "keepers at home," for a
gossiping mother is sure to make gossiping daughters. Let it be seen that you are happy at home,
in the midst of your families. Put on a cheerful
countenance, that your children may love to bask
in the sunshine of your smiles. Be the center of
attraction to your families, and let the household
delight to revolve in sweetest harmony around your
maternal chair.
Industrious habits will contribute greatly to the
happiness of home, especially on the part of a young
female. Slothfulness is a wretched thing, not only
as regards the subject of it, but as affecting others.
A lazy person can not be a happy one. Indolence
is a constant opposition to the law of our being,
which is made for activity. That there is a species
i —- 




THE YOUNG WOMAN AT IOME.        227
of indulgence connected with it, is true; but it is a
very mixed kind of gratification, for as it is against
nature, there is sometimes a consciousness of this,
which awakens the conscience and inflicts remorse.
To the remonstrances of conscience are added the
reproaches of others; and as it can not always be
indulged, there are the repugnance, the lassitude,
the vis inertice to be overcome, which makes the
least exertion of indolence more wearisome than far
greater efforts of activity. Slothfulness is a miserable object to look at. The very sight of it inflicts
pain upon an industrious person. What a misery
is it to an industrious mother, to see the dull,
heavy, immovable habits of a daughter, whom neither entreaties, persuasives, nor rebukes can quicken into activity, or excite to industry —who, if
moved at all, must be moved like a stone up hill,
by main force, and which, without the same effort
to keep it going, is ever rolling back again into its
former place: a poor, lumpish creature, who is
enough to wear out the patience of the most forbearing and affectionate mother on earth. Such a
habit must be destructive of domestic happiness.
It may not come into the family with the noise, and
destructive force, and fury of a hurricane, like the
profligacy of a prodigal son, but it settles down
upon its comfort like the silent power of a blight or
a mildew. It is a constant vexation, which eats
into the very core of a mother's heart, when she
finds that a daughter who is grown to an age when
she ought to be a relief to maternal labor and solic




228         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
itude, is a heavy increase to both. This wretched
habit may be overcome, and it must be, or you will
be a poor, helpless, useless, unhappy creature
through life. If indolent in your parents' house,
what are you likely to be in your own. An idle
daughter is likely to make an idle mother; and
from my soul, I pity the man who is tied for life to
a lazy, indolent woman. No personal charms, no
mental acquirements, no brilliancy of conversation,
can make up for the want of domestic industry:
and, indeed, these things are rarely found in the absence of industry, for indolence is usually too lazy
to acquire knowledge; the habits of soul and body
being in sympathy with each other.
It is essential to your making home happy that
there should be much self-denial-a spirit of forbearance-an occasional surrender, for the sake of
peace, of supposed rights-a willingness to forego
what you could righteously claim as your own. I
am aware there are limits to this, especially in
cases where concession pampers tyranny and invites oppression. There may be brothers, and even
sisters, whose disposition is so encroaching that it
should, by parental authority, be resisted on behalf
of the weaker and more yielding members of the
household. It is, however, far better in some cases
to concede rights, when the sacrifice is not too
costly, and does not involve a violation of principle, than to contend for them. The contest, even
where it is successful, often costs more than it is
worth-the victory does not pny for the battle,




THE YOUNG WOMAN AT HOME.        229
Be, therefore, content sometimes to lose a little for
the sake of retaining a great deal more. I can not
give you a piece of advice more conducive to your
peace at home, or to your comfort through life,
than to be ever ready gracefully and quietly to
bear with the infirmities of disposition of those
around you, and to yield in little things what you
deem belongs to you, rather than disturb the peace
of the family by contending for them.
Nearly allied to this is the importance of neve,
seeking to engross an undue share of parenta,
affection. Let there be no ambition to be a
favorite, nor any arts to obtain this distinction.
Some young people have made home miserable irn
this way. They have been base and guilty enough
to attempt to rise in the esteem and affection of
their parents, by little arts of detraction in reference
to their brothers and sisters; and some parents are
weak enough to encourage the attempt. Partiality
is then not only cherished but manifested. Envy
and jealousy ensue. The peace of the family is
destroyed. Abhor this conduct, and be content to
share with other branches of the family your
parents' justly-apportioned regards.
Recollect that your power to contribute to the
happiness of home does not depend on the performance of rare and great services, which do but very
seldom  occur, but in attention to little things,
which are ever transpiring. Our existence as to
time is made up not only of years, but of moments:
our body as to bulk, not only of limbs, but of par
20




230         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
tides: our history as to events, not only of great
events, but of little occurrences: and our obligations,
not only of splendid acts of duty, but of seemingly
insignificant ones. Set out in life with a deep sense
of the importance of little things, or, rather, with a
conviction that where character, duty, and happiness
are concerned, relating not only to ourselves but to
others, nothing is little. This applies especially to
your conduct in the family. In that little world,
then, keep up a constant attention to what will
constitute the felicity of the passing hour. True
politeness has been defined to consist in "benevolence in trifles." It is a beautiful definition, and is
~worthy of being remembered by all who would fill
the family circle with bliss. By politeness here I
do not mean the heartless and unmeaning ceremony
of the world, such as is taught by Lord Chesterfield's pages; nor even the graceful polish of manners
which characterizes the intercourse of well-bred
people; but a gentle, obliging demeanor and delicacy of behavior toward all around; that mode
of conducting ourselves toward others which is
opposed to all that is coarse, vulgar, rude, and
offensively familiar. The politeness that I mean is
not affection's root, but it is its flower, beauty, and
fragrance; or if not the plant itself, it is like the
hedge round it, which preserves it from being
trampled under foot. In the family circle all the
little acts that can give pleasure or pain, yea, all
the words, tones, and looks, should ever be considered and weighed. Woman has, perhaps, more tact




THE YOUNG WOMAN AT IOME.         231
and discernment in reference to the minor affairs of
life than man. IHer mental eye is more discerning,
her touch more delicate, her taste more refined on
all matters of behavior. Let her, therefore, keep up
this in reference to the conduct at home. Mrs.
Copley, in dwelling upon this, has the following
reference to her own history: "Might I be permitted to say, that after the lapse of twenty-six
years, a sensation of pleasure thrills through my
fingers, when I recollect the daily task of tying on
my father's neckeloth, and combing back my mother's silvery locks." *  * " But we return to the
more ordinary circumstances of young females,
resident under the parental roof, after having finished
the term of their education; and observe, that their
conduct should be marked by a soothing forbearance and tenderness toward the infirmities of their
parents. Deafness, lameness, dim-sightedness, and
other infirmities of age, circumscribe their pleasures,
and, perhaps, a degree of fietfulness is sometimes
observed.  But a dutiful child will be fertile in
expedients to extend their pleasures, to alleviate
their privations, and to bear with and soothe their
infirmities.  The prompt eye will. discern their
needs, and anticipate their wishes. The needle will
be threaded before the eye aches with endeavoring,
and before the sigh is excited by inability, to
accomplish it; or, by gentle and playful persuasion,
the needle-work will be exchanged for knitting or
netting. The leg-rest or the footstool will be presented or exchanged before complaint of uneasiness




232         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
is uttered. The large-printed Bible and the spectacles will be placed at hand; the dim columns of
the newspaper will be read aloud; the inquiring
eye will be answered by a repetition of the conversation, or of the sacred address, which, uttered by a
stranger's voice, had passed over the dull ear; and
in the most exalted sense, the benevolent pleasure
will be enjoyed of being eyes to the blind, feet to
the lame, ears to the deaf, and causing the trembling
heart to sing for joy."*
I now return to the idea with which we started
-that the right conduct of a " daughter at home,"
is to study to make home happy. There is, my
young fiiends, a fascination in the very expression
— A HAPPY HOME. And so far as what may be
called the poetry of home scenes is concerned, is
there a lovelier flower to be found in this garden
of earthly delights, this paradise of sweets, than a
good daughter and affectionate sister, adorning her
maiden charms with the virtues that become her
sex, her age, and her relationships, and elevating
and sanctifying all her other excellences by a saintly
piety, which makes her lovely in the eyes of God
by all the beauties of holiness? Her father's pride,
* These extracts are from an anonymous work published
by the Religious Tract Society, entitled "( Female Excellence," which was written, as well as many others, by that
admirable woman. If the productions of her pen had not
the brilliancy of many other writers, they are all adapted
to usefulness.  By her decease the female part of the
community have lost one of their ablest guides.




THE YOUNG WOMAN AT HOME.        233
her mother's comfort, and her brother's companion,
she i~s the ministering angel of them all.  How
much of bliss does that one dear object of their
common affection throw over them all! Her absence is mourned as a common loss, and her return
to the family circle is hailed as the restoration of a
suspended enjoyment.  This loved one has been
loved by another that belongs not to the family,
but who is about, through her, to be united with it.
With what a treasure, at their expense, is he about
to enrich his own home. Their hearts, at the
thought of parting from her, bleed from wounds
which nothing but the hope of her happiness could
heal. Her removal leaves a blank, which, as they
look upon her vacant seat, calls up recollections,
and produces a sense of deprivation, which even
her happy union can scarcely appease. But as
woman's mission is to make happy the home of her
husband, she is now gone forth to fulfill hers.
Well has she been trained, and well has she trained
herself, also, at her mother's home, for this home
of her own, where all the united excellences of the
good daughter and the good sister now develop
and blend in the more mature and matronly virtues of the good wife, mother, and mistress; and
she who, as "the young woman at home," contributed so largely to the felicity of one family circle,
was preparing to contribute still more largely to
the felicity of another, and that other is her own.
Behold, my young friends, your pattern. May the imitation of it be your study, your prayer, your bliss.
20*




(6/   n Tnung Wnum    amnq frnm 3nmr.
"Behold, I am with thee, and will keep thee in all
places whither thou goest."-Gs.NEIs sxviii. 15.
"In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and he shall
direct thy paths."-PRovERBS iii. 6 
"Thou shalt guide me with thy counsel, and afterward receive me to glory,"-PSALM lxxiii. 24.
THE hour of separation from parental society,
home enjoyments, and the scenes of early history,
is in most cases, and ought to be in all, a season of
pensive grief. No affectionate daughter can leave
the house of her father, and go fiom beneath the
covering wing of maternal love, without passing
over "the bridge of sighs."  Even the joys of the
bridal morning, when she quits the arms of her
hitherto nearest relations, to throw herself into
those of one now still nearer, do not prevent her
from looking round with something of instinctive
regret on the scenes she is leaving, now no longer
hers; and amid the smiles of the happy bride,
are seen falling the tears of the loving child, like
dew-drops sparkling in sunbeams. It would augur
ill for the husband, if his wife could part fiom her
parents, even for him, without a momentary pang.
It is one of nature's loveliest sights to see in that
_____________________________________________~_______________________,__ J.




THE YOUNG WOMAN AWAY FROM HOME. 235
scene and season of delight, filial piety blending its
luster with conjugal affection, and investing even
nuptial charms with new and captivating beauty.
But I now speak of a different kind and purpose
of separation from home. I contemplate the young
woman, not led out by that right hand, the "cun
ning" of which is to be employed for her support;
nor going away, leaning upon that arm which is to
be continually stretched over her for protection, but
departing solitarily and mournfully on the journey
of life, to meet alone its dangers, cares, and toils.
It is sad enough to see a young man quitting his
father's house, and leaving home to earn his daily
bread by the sweat of his brow; how much more
to see a young female thus go forth to seek her own
support. What is it but a lamb venturing out into
the wilderness where wolves abound; or a young
dove quitting its nest to fly abroad, amid eagles and
vultures. How many in the progress of life, and
amid its changes, some of which are so melancholy,
look back to the hour of separation and exclaim,
" Oh, my mother, how sad and certain presages of
what awaited me were those bitter tears I shed on
that morning when I tore myself from thy embrace! My heart then sunk, and the sun of my
life then set never to rise. Every step since then
of my dark journey has been one of sorrow; and
every change, but of one calamity for another."
In some cases separation from home is rendered
necessary by a change in domestic circumstances,
and she who was brought up ever so tenderly amid
K______j




236         YOUNG WOMAN S GUIDE.
the luxuries, and with the prospects of opulence, is
now compelled to quit scenes where she was a
stranger to toil and care, to earn her own support.
It is a sight to be looked upon with admiration, to
behold a young woman in these circumstances, instead of hanging upon parents no longer able to
support her without additional privations for themselves, nobly resolving to relieve them of this burden, and instead of sitting down in despairing grief
and helpless sorrow, bracing her mind to meet the
privations of her altered condition, descending
gracefully to her lower level, and going forth with
true magnanimity, inspired by religion, to tread
life's stormy wave alone.  No morbid sense of
degradation; no feeling of false shame, arising from
humbled circumstances; no haughty sense of humiliation connected with a situation of subordination and dependence, benumbs her faculties, paralyzes her energies, or renders the duties of her new
situation irksome and oppressive; but remembering
it is the will of Providence, and thankful for her
health, her abilities, and her opportunities to take
care of herself, she goes to her situation without
dread, despondency, or reluctance.
Others meet with no such reverse, but are brought
up amid circumstances which have always kept
before them the probability that they must go out
into the world to earn their own support. In these
cases, it comes not upon them by surprise, and if
they are wise they will endeavor to prepare their
hearts, and qualify their minds for this change of




THE YOUNG WOMAN AWAY FROM HOME.     237
residence. A judicious mother's energies and vigilance, will ever be employed not only in helping
her daughters, but in teaching them to help themselves. Wherever there is a probability of their
leaving home, and even where there is not, her anxiety, considering the vicissitudes of human life,
should be directed to the point of qualifying them
to be self-supporting. And it should be a point of
ambition with every young woman, whose parents
can, with difficulty, support their family, not to be
burdens to them, but to take care of herself in
some honorable and useful occupation. It is a very
beautiful scene to witness a young female not only
supporting herself, but endeavoring, by the produce
of her diligence, and the savings of her frugality,
to minister to the comfort of aged, infirm, or impoverished parents. Many a filial heroine has left
home, and endured privations neither few nor small,
for this purpose. All her discomfort and labor are
endured with patience, under the idea that by this
means she is rendering the home of her beloved
parents more happy. Here, however, a caution is
necessary against a too great eagerness to get away
from home. A large family, where there is a straitened income, brings many cares, and some privations, not only upon the mother, but upon the elder
daughters. In such a case, for a young woman who
can be of essential service to her mother, and whom
her mother wishes to retain, to determine or even
wish to go out into the world, and leave her mother
to struggle and almost faint under the load, is a




238         YOUNGc WOMAN'S GUIDE.
deplorable want of filial piety. It is delightful to
hear a daughter say, " Any where, or in any circumstances, abroad or at home, in single or in wedded
life, my beloved and honored parents, I am ready,
and willing, and eager to serve you."
There is another and melancholy occasion, which
not unfrequently occurs, for a young woman's leaving home, and that is, when home itself is broken
up by the death of both parents. How frequently
does this happen  Ah, how often are families invaded by the last enemy, and scattered hither and
thither by his desolating ravages! The grave
covers both father and mother. The dear, domestic hearth is forsaken. The family gatherings at
prayer, at meals, at festive seasons, are over, and
the house of your childhood and youth is deserted.
Poor orphans, I pity you; especially ye orphan
girls, my heart bleeds for you. Your brothers can
shift for themselves better than you can. But even
you have no need to despond. Painful I know it
is to have no parent no home, no settled place of
abode. Often, in your forlorn situation, you must
and do say, "Alas for me-I am alone in the world.
David's expression suits my case. I am like a
pelican in the wilderness; or like a sparrow, alone,
upon the house-top. Other young people, though
away from home, have a home to think and talk
about; and parents to write to, and occasionally to
visit. I have none. I have not a house to dwell
in, except that which I may soon be required to
leave; nor have I any friends, except those which
F.~ ~~~~ —`         -------




THE YOUNG WOMAN AWAY FROM HOME.'23C
my own good conduct may secure. My heart is
often more desolate than my condition; and though
I am in the midst of society, I feel as if I were
alone in this great and busy world." But I remind
you there is the orphan's unfailing friend still left.
God lives, and he is the father of the fatherless. Be
it yours, and it may be yours, to say, " When my
father and my mother forsake me, the Lord will take
me up." Should you be wise and happy enough to
become truly pious, you will never be without a
friend, and in the absence of an earthly father, will
have an omnipotent one in heaven. You may then
set forth in life, and go through it, adopting as your
motto the reply of Abraham to Isaac, who, when
the latter said, " Behold the fire and the wood, but
where is the lamb for a burnt-offering2" replied,
"God-will provide."  Be that your motto, " God
will provide." Fear God, and you may without
scruple, and with confidence, adopt this assurance.
Permit me now to suggest some topics which
apply alike to all these different cases, and which it
is important you should dwell upon, either in prospect of leaving home, or when you have left it.Consider it is in the order of Providence you
should be thus situated.  Your lot is fixed in
heaven. It is God's will, and not chance. Is there
nothing consolatory in that? Consider his wisdom,
power, and goodness. He does all things well.
He knows what is best for you. He may, in ways
you can not imagine, be consulting your future and
permanent good. You see not the end. When




240         YOUNG WOMAN'S GUIDE.
this is revealed, you may be compelled to exclaim,
"He leadeth the blind by a way that they know
not, and leadeth them in paths that they have not
known. He maketh darkness light before them,
and crooked things straight."  Submit, therefore,
without envy of others, and without murmuring
against them. Would you contravene his purpose? Say, therefore, " It is the Lord, let him do
what seemeth good in his sight. I am where he
would have me be."
But remember there are not only privations to
be endured away from home, but moral dangers
also to be encountered. If these are not so pressing
in your case as in that of your brothers, there are
some perils even in yours. Happily for you, the
guards of female decorum, propriety, and reputation, are stronger and more strict than those of the
other sex. But they have proved too weak for
absolute security in thousands of instances. Multitudes who have stood well at home, have unhappily
fallen, when removed from it. Eve was tempted
when alone, and away from the protection of her
husband. Alas! how many have gone away to sin,
and have returned to hide their shame! A mother's
watchful eye is no longer upon you, a father's arm
is no longer stretched over you, and the shelter of
home no longer protects you. Others know this
as well as you, and may take advantage of it.
And even if there were no danger of vice, is there
none of imprudence, folly, levity? None, of bad
ccnnections, improper acquaintance, ill-contracted




THE YOUNG WOMAN AWAY FROM HOME. 241
marriages? None, of Sabbath-breaking, of undue
love of pleasure, of vanity? Are not the prevailing faults and defects of some women their vanity,
their love of dress, their disposition to court attention and admiration, their fickleness, their inconsiderateness, their love of novelty, their want of
judgment, their curiosity? And are not all these
likely to increase rather than diminish, when they
are away from the checks which home supplies?
Are not these weeds likely to grow faster, and to
attain greater strength, when there is no mother's
eye to see them, no mother's hand to pluck them
up? All this danger is greatly heightened where
there are personal or mental accomplishments. A
beautiful young woman, withdrawn from the fostering care and ceaseless vigilance of a judicious
mother, and exposed abroad to the rude and licentious gaze of the world, is ever an object of alarm
to others, and it were well if she were so to herself.
It is, perhaps, a rare case for such a female to be
ignorant of her charms; it is rarer still for her to
be more afraid than vain of them, and to be more
anxious that they should not lead her into danger,
than that they should secure for her admiration.
The great source of CONSOLATION and PROTECTION
to a young woman from home is-true religion. It
is very possible and very easy to any one, especially to any one who has known the comforts of
home, to conceive of the privations and the discomfort of some young persons, whether sustaining
the character of a governess, a shop-woman, or a
21




242         YOUNG WOMAN'S GUIDE.
servant. The cold, proud, and, perhaps, in some
cases, cruel treatment of their employers, as contrasted with the affectionate conduct of their parents;
the annoying and unfeeling peculiarities of their
companions in the house, contrasted with tHe sympathizing and loving behavior of their brothers and
sisters; the disregard of their comfort in what concerns their food, lodging, and general personal convenience, as contrasted with all the accommodations
and enjoyments of their father's house; and the
general inattention and neglect of the strangers
among whom they dwell, as contrasted with the
recognition and kind notice of a wide circle of
friends in their own native place-this, all this, is
bitter indeed. Some hard and unfeeling natures,
or gay and frivolous ones, would be insensible to
these things, but 0 that poor girl of softer mould,
whose heart was made for home scenes, and whose
bliss was derived from home enjoyments-why,
under all this, her heart is sometimes ready to
burst.  What thoughts disturb her peace, like
visions of bliss lighting on her gloomy and sorrowful path, and then instantly vanishing, only to leave
the path still more gloomy, and the darkness still
more oppressive!  What letters, wet with her
tears, she writes to her own sweet home, and to her
sympathizing parents!
What is to comfort her? Only the balmy influence of religion, the consciousness that she is in the
way of duty, and the testimony of her conscience
that she is discharging her obligations with scru



THE YOUNG WOMAN AWAY FROM HOME. 243
pulous fidelity. This can, and will. She whose
heart is truly renewed by Divine grace, who has
genuine faith in our Lord Jesus Christ, who walks
with God as her divine, unchangeable, omnipotent
Friend, and communes with him as her Heavenly
Father, whose affections are set on things above,
and who considers life as a probation for eternityshe will find, in such a state of Wind, a source of
consolation, a means of endurance, an element of
happiness, which will counterbalance all discomfort,
disquietude, and distress. With true dignity she
will bow to the will of God, and consider her situation as his appointment. She will find satisfaction
in submission. Her religion will impart something
of cheerfulness, and much of patience; it will control her temper, and throw an air of loveliness over
her character, that will give her an interest in the
heart of her employer. In your Bible and other
good books, my young friends, you will ever find
companions; in your closet of devotion, and in
communion with God, a sweet retreat from the
coldness and unkindnesses of your fellow-creatures;
and in meditation upon your everlasting rest above,
a blessed substitute for the comforts of the home
you have left on earth. Faith in God, in Christ, in
Providence, in Heaven, can comfort, has comforted,
will comfort, in the dreariest situations of life, and
in the bitterest agonies of death. I am anxious
you should set out in life with this lofty idea of
true piety, that it can sweeten the bitterest cup of
human woe, can soften the hardest lot, and can




244         YOUNG WOMAN S GUIDE.
be a substitute for all other pleasures. It must be
so; for it made Adam happy in Paradise, and
makes saints and angels happy in heaven. It has
lighted, as with a lamp kindled in heaven, the confessor's dungeon, has sustained the Christian fugitive in his exile, and has made even the agonies of
the stake to be tolerable to the martyr.
Adopt religion then, young women, as your
companion, for it will not only comfort you, but
also protect you. Yes, it will be a shield for your
defense, as well as a cup of consolation amid your
sorrows. Expect temptations, for you will certainly
have them in one way or other. You can not even
imagine in what shape or from what quarter they
will come. It may be in a form so fascinating, so
plausible, so unsuspected, so insidious, as to contain
all the "deceivableness of unrighteousness." Do
not imagine that Satan respects female virtue too
much to assail it. Did he thus respect the holiness
of Eve in the garden of Eden? Does he reverence
any character or any virtue-did he not tempt our
Lord? The more spotless the character, and the
more eminent the excellence, the more intense is
his hatred, the more malignant his envy, and the
more eager his desire to despoil it. Has he not
tempted to their ruin multitudes as pure as you
are? Against such a foe, whom all but infinite
cunning makes skillful, and boundless success makes
bold, consider yourselves safe only under the protection of Omnipotence; and that protection can
be obtained only by faith and prayer. Of those




THE YOUNG WOMAN AWAY FROM HOME.      245
millions of instanices of female frailty which the
history of your sex has presented, not one would
have occurred if they had trusted their virtue to
the keeping of true godliness. It is religion that
will repel the fiercest assault with the holy and indignant remonstrance, " How shall I do this great
wickedness, and sin against God!"
It is not only, however, from such dangers as
these-dangers affecting moral character in its most
important features-that religion will protect you,
but from the lesser ones also, which, if they do not
lead to vice, are still injurious.  Religion will
moderate your love of pleasure by furnishing pleasures of its own. It will check your vanity and
folly, by producing a devout seriousness and sobriety of mind, without at all destroying your
natural and innocent vivacity. It will remove your
inconsiderateness, and make you thoughtful and
reflective, without stiffening you into formality, or
investing you with gloom. It will induce habits of
forethought and frugality, and thus guard you from
present imprudence and recklessness, and future
improvidence and extravagance. Do not, then,
venture out into the world unprotected by this spirit
as your guardian angel.
There are one or two other cautions which it may
be of importance you should receive and remember.
You should never allow yourselves for a moment
to imagine there is any thing dishonorable or degrading in your being compelled to leave home and
to support yourself, either as governess, shopwoman,
21*




246         YOUNG WOMAN'S GUIDE.
or servant. Those who have been in better cir.
cumstances are, of course, most apt to feel this. And
no doubt it is a descent-a lower status, according
to the conventionalities of human life: but it is no
dishonor. It is from misconduct, and not from
misfortune; from loss of character, and not from
loss of rank, that disgrace arises. Nobility of soul
is often associated with plebeian descent; while
vulgarity of character is sometimes covered with
the coronet or the crown. A virtuous, holy, and
intelligent young female in the heraldry of heaven
has a patent of nobility, and is one of God's peeresses in her own right. Industry is far more honorable than wealthy indolence; and she who willingly,
honestly, cheerfully earns her own support, when
Providence has deprived her of her patrimony, is
far more to be admired than she would have been,
had she been still rolled through life in her father's
equipage, and obsequiously waited upon by servants
in livery.
Akin to this is another state of mind against
which you should most sedulously guard, and that
is, a conviction, or any thing approaching to it, that
you must be miserable away from home. It is conceded that you can not be as happy away from
home, as you would be at home. It is not right
you should be. There can be no perfect substitute
for a united and happy family circle. But, then,
when called by Providence to surrender it, give it
up with submission and fortitude, and yield to the
privation with true magnanimity. Let it be said




THE YOUNG WOMAN AWAY FROM HOME. 247
of you on leaving, as was said by Milton of Eve, on
her departing from Paradise"Some natural tears she dropped, but wiped them soon."
Weep you may, you ought, at giving up the dear
delights you have enjoyed from childhood in your
father's house; and can not but sometimes feel
pensive at recollecting the friends from whom you
have been separated. But to allow your love of
home to make your absence from it an intolerable
wretchedness-to render you moody and melancholy, discontented and ill-tempered-to unfit you
for business, and make you unpleasant to your employer and companions, this is proof of a weak
mind, a feeble heart, and a sickly character. Rise
above it, my young friends.. If Providence calls
you away, bear it with composure. Go out expecting to meet with privations, and make up your mind
to endure them with fortitude. Make the best of
your situation. Doom not yourself to misery on
this account. You may be happy any where, by
religion, good temper, submission to your lot, and
usefulness. If you determine to find out the pleasure your present situation affords, instead of ever
looking back upon that which you have left-if you
resolve by God's grace, to please and be pleasedif you give up your mind to piety, industry, and
usefulness-you will find that felicity is a flower
that blooms, a fruit that grows, away from home as
well as at home. A cheerful spirit, like a lamp
lighting any darkness into which it may be carried,
__________________i~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~..




248         YOUNG WOMAN'S GUIDE.
lessens the discomfort of any situation, recommends
you to your employer, and promotes your interest
as well as your happiness.
Perhaps it may not be amiss to say a few things
on the choice of a situation, which, indeed, appertain to your parents, where they are living, as well
as to yourselves. Let the subject be made the matter of earnest and believing prayer to God. "In all
thy ways acknowledge him, and he will direct thy
paths."  "Commit thy way to him, and he shall
bring it to pass." These are precious declarations,
and they are sustained by promises no less precious. "The meek will he guide in judgment, and
the meek will he teach his way"-Psalm xxv. 9.
"I will instruct thee, and teach thee in the way
which thou shalt go: I will guide thee with mine
eye"-Psalm xxxii. 8. With such exhortations
and assurances, what should be your resolution?
"Thou shalt guide me with thy counsel."  There
is Providence in every thing. Even your mean
affairs are under Divine direction.  Your times
are in his hand. Do not doubt it. Hold fast the
truth, that God hears your prayer, casts your lot,
and fixes the bounds of your habitation. Pray,
pray earnestly, believingly, and expectingly. All
situations and all hearts are at his disposal.
In selecting, accepting, and retaining a situation,
tonsult its religious advantages.
In these is included an anxious desire to obtain
such means of pulpit religious instruction as are
likely to build up a young disciple on her holy




THE YOUNG WOMAN AWAY FROM HOME. 249
faith, and to quicken into activity the principles of
godliness planted in the soul by the Spirit of God.
It is not ordinarily desirable, where a selection can
be made, to choose a situation where even the
minor matters of sacrament and church government
differ from those to which she has been accustomed.
It exposes her, if not to a change of sentiment, yet
to an antagonism and a perplexity, which are unfavorable to the quiet enjoyment of her own personal religion, and may do her some injury by
producing a spirit of controversy. Where the differences of opinion are of a more serious kind,
affecting even the fundamental doctrines of the gospel, no pious young person should expose herself to
a hazard of this kind.
I will now address a few special counsels and
cautions to two or three classes of those who are in
the situation contemplated by this discourse.
There are many occupied in the very important
and responsible duties of a resident and permanent
governess. This is a situation of both delicacy
difficulty, and momentous consequence, and requires much wisdom, prudence, and conscientiousness. There are many parties concerned, all of
whose interest and comfort should and must be
consulted.  You who are in this situation owe
something to yourself. There is a respect due to
you from those who have engaged you, which they
will be most likely to pay when they see you
respecting yourself. If they so far confide in you
as to intrust you with the education of their chil




250         YOUNG WOMAN'S GUIDE.
dren, they ought to treat you in that manner which
will teach them also to confide in you and esteem
you. But this will depend much upon your own
conduct and bearing. Let them be duly aware that
you expect all that belongs to you in the way of
kind and respectful conduct, but that you expect no
more. Any apprehension on their part that your
demands of this nature are too high, or are preferred in an obtrusive and exacting spirit, will be sure
to set them on their guard against an encroaching
disposition, and dispose them to yield you less than
your due. A kind, attentive, respectful, and dignified bearing toward them, as far from servility on
the one hand as it is from familiarity on the other,
as well as a right behavior toward their children,
will, in most cases, accomplish all you wish. If
you have come to your present situation by a descent from a former one far above it, let there be
no such sense of degradation and mortified pride;
no such hauteur or loftiness, as shall make you
gloomy, dissatisfied, unhappy, and repulsive. Even
should it appear that you have exchanged places
with your employers, that they once were in the
situation of dependence you now occupy, give no
evidence that you are aware of it, and take no
notice of little ebullitions of vulgarity, or even the
purse-proud insolence not uncommon to those who
have risen in life. If sometimes you can not be insensible to this, and you feel your spirit rising
within you, and your cheek growing flushed and
warm, so as to show yonr mortification, call in your! ___  _________    - ________________




THE YOUNG WOMAN AWAY FROM HOME. 251
religion to your aid, comfort yourself in God, and
exemplify the Christian in a spirit of meek forbear
ance. In such circumstances, many a tearful look
will be thrown back by memory on that home
from which by misfortune you have been driven out,
or, rather, by Providence, and you will need to retire
to calm your perturbation and repress your indignation. In such cases go, and by prayer invite the hand
of your Heavenly Father to wipe your weeping eyes,
and compose your ruffled peace and agitated heart.
Then there are the children intrusted to your
care for their education. Enter upon such a task
with a deep and solemn sense of responsibility to
them, to their parents, and to their God. Abhor
the meanness, the injustice, and the cruelty of
merely teaching them for hire, and of being satisfied with any manner of discharging your duty, so
as you get your board, your salary, and your respectful treatment. The future character and comfort, for both worlds, of those girls, depend much
upon you. They have been placed in your hands,
and now look up to you as their instructress and
oracle. As you would give in your account at last
to God with joy, and not with grief, do your very
uttermost, tax your energies, to do them and their
parents justice, in instructing their minds, forming
their character, and fitting them for the station they
are to occupy in life. Prepare yourself for your
task by constant reading and study. Do not be
satisfied with your present qualifications. The education of a rational and immortal creature, for this




252         YOUNG WOMAN S GUIDE.
world and the next, is a great work. Improve
your own mind, to be better fitted to improve
theirs. Win their confidence by your ability,
their affection by your kindness, their reverence
by your dignity, and their application by your
diligence. Let your aim be, not only to communicate knowledge, but wisdom;' not only to store
the memory, but to strengthen the judgment, to
nerve the will, and to make the conscience tender;
not only to teach them to think correctly, but to
act with propriety, discretion, and promptness, in
any situation in which they may be placed.
As regards religion, this, of course, must depend
much upon the views of the parents. If these are
similar to your own, and you have unrestricted liberty on this point, labor to the uttermost to form
the religious character of your youthful charge.
Ever consider the education of an immortal being
incomplete without instruction in that which alone
can fit her for immortality. But never act the parti
of a covert zealot, by inculcating principles opposed
to those of the parent. I should say to a religious
young woman, go into no situation where your are
not allowed to teach what you consider to be the
truth as it is in Jesus. Do not conceal your sentiments, and then teach them secretly and stealthily.
You would abhor such conduct in a Roman Catholic-do not be guilty of it yourself. Of course you
could not conscientiously teach what you believe to
be error, and should not; therefore do not go where
you would be required to do so.




THE YOUNG WOMAN AWAY FROM HOME. 253
Then come the parents to be considered by you.
Of course you will do every thing you can to uphold their authority, even as they ought to do their
uttermost to uphold yours. You should also most
assiduously labor to secure the affections of their
children for them, rather than for yourself.  It
would be treachery of the basest kind to steal away
the hearts of their children to yourself. Your aim
should be to secure the love of the children to you,
for their parents' sake, as well as your own; and
then love to their parents, for your sake, as well as
for those to whom it primarily belongs.
There is another thing to be observed, and one
which I shall touch upon with the delicacy it
demands; and that is the fact, that a wife has sometimes been made uncomfortable by the residence
of a governess. Jealousy, it is true, is sometimes
more predominant in this case than it need be, and
is suspicious without reason.  But are there no
cases in which uneasiness is not entirely the result
of an over-sensitive and morbid imagination? Respect your own character and dignity, a wife's
peace, and a husband's honor, too much, even to
covet, to seek, or to accept attentions, even though
playful and innocent ones, which may excite uneasiness in that one bosom, the tranquillity of which
is so easily disturbed.  Conduct yourself so as
not only to be without blame, but also without
suspicion.
Apart from this, do nothing by becoming the
depository of secrets, hearing tales, or uttering
22
_    _     _  _     _                             1~




251          YOUNG WOMAN'S GUIDE.
insinuations, to loosen the bonds, or violate the
affection of husband and wife, or to disturb the
peace of the family. If, unhappily, a schism should
exist, keep yourself as much as possible out of the
way, or let your wisest and kindest offices be
exerted to heal the breach. Win for yourself the
blessing which will come upon the peace-maker,
and cause the family to bless the hour which made
you a member of the household. Recollect, you
are bound in honor never to make the transactions
or condition. of the family matter of conversation
with others. Without being actually sworn, or even
pledged, to secrecy, you are solemnly bound to
observe it; and are a traitress to the family which
has received you as an inmate, if you make their
affairs known to others. Never intermeddle with
the servants, and especially avoid all unnecessary
familiarity with them. Keep to your own sphere,
and diligently discharge your own duties. You
will find sufficient scope here for all your time, your
energies, and your anxiety.
For such a course of conduct, seek by prayer the
grace and wisdom which come from on high, and
under all the trials of your situation-the waywardness of the children, or the ingratitude, the pride, and
the petulance of their parents-seek the comfort
which cometh from the Father of Mercies, and the
God of all consolation.
Governesses in a school are a class of young
females, who, though acting under the direction and
supervision of another, and, therefore, being less




THE YOUNG WOMAN AWAY FROM HOME. 255
responsible than those who reside in a family, have
very important duties to discharge, and for which
high qualifications, both intellectual and moral, are
essential.
I now consider the case of those young persons
who are employed in our retail shops. These form
a very large class. Their situation is often one of far
greater discomfort and moral danger than that of the
class just mentioned. In addition to the oppressive
and exhausting labor which modern competition
imposes upon them, in common with all who are
engaged in trade, they have to bear, in some cases,
the unkindness of their employers, who are not
unfrequently deplorably wanting in regard to the
comfort of those whom they have received into
their service, both as to food, lodging, and general
treatment. A surly master and his unfeeling wife,
intent only upon what they can get out of the flesh,
and bone, and muscle, of their servants, and caring
little for their welfare; never satisfied with even the
most exemplary diligence and competent ability,
and therefore ever urging to greater labor, and ever
uttering the language of complaint; always suspicious, even where there is no ground for it, of the
honesty of their servants-such are the trials which
some of these hapless young people have to bear.
In such a case, you to whom it appertains, need
comfort. The recollections of home, where all was
kindness, comfort, and confidence, embitter, by the
power of contrast, the ills you have to endure.
Bear all with as much patience as you can obtain.




256         YOUNG WOMAN'S GUIDE.
Seek consolation in true piety. Carry your sorrows
to God by prayer. When the bitter contrast between your situation at home and from home forces
itself upon your thoughts, and sends the tear to
your eye and the thorn to your heart, go to Him
whose gracious presence is ever with you, and His
infinite love ever ready for you.
But it is not thus with all shop-keepers. I am
not describing the class, but only some of its members-the exceptions rather than the rule.. 1 know
of heads of retail establishments, employing a large
number of young people, who cherish for them
something of the feelings of parents, and who
regard them almost in the light of children. Nor
is it their temporal comfort exclusively, but also
their spiritual welfare, which is the object of their
solicitude. And this is obviously their incumbent
duty. Exceptions to this, however, do exist, and
it is therefore well to have them thus arraigned and
exposed as beacons to warn others.
Whether your employers be generous and kind,
or neglectful and oppressive, do your duty; and
seek to possess all those qualifications which shall
commend you to their esteem. Diligence is indispensable. It is the first excellence of one in your
situation. Be anxious to please, and as earnest to
serve your employer, as if the business were your
own. No one will or can employ an indolent servant. Be an early riser. Comply with all the rules
of the shop. Aim at excellence. Seek to be clever.
Cultivate an attractive, winning, and ever polite




THE YOUNG WOMAN AWAY FROM HOME.     257
address. Be in the best sense of the term a clever
shop-woman. Especially let your honesty be above
suspicion. Deem it no insult or reproach that I
caution you on this subject; you are exposed to
temptation. Money in small sums is continually
passing through your hands; your salary may be
low, and under the deceitfulness of the heart you
may be so convinced of the injustice of your small
stipend, as to imagine it to be almost lawful to pay
yourself, and thus supplement what is wanting.
Resist every temptation of this kind. Rather starve
and die, than appropriate an article of clothing, or
of decoration, or a farthing of property of your
employer to your own use. As a guard upon your
integrity, and a check to temptation, avoid expense
in dress and ornament. Vanity is an insatiable
passion, and it is this, more than any thing else,
which has led to dishonesty. A taste for finery
was fostered and indulged, the salary was too small
to yield the means of its gratification, and it impelled its victim to acts of pilfering to supply the
deficiency.
In some establishments, though it is not now
common, young persons of both sexes are employed.
Where this is the case it brings new perils, and requires additional caution. Your honor, your respectability, your safety, require that you should
be most anxiously upon your guard. How earnestly
as well as sincerely should you present those beautiful petitions of our Lord's prayer, " Lead me not
into temptation, but deliver me from evil."  Avoid
22*




258         YOUNG WOMAN S GUIDE.
all undue familiarity, all flippant and trifling conduct, all unrestrained jocularity, with the young
men who may be employed in the same establishment. Maintain a proper self-respect, a becoming
reserve, and a dignified bearing, which shall be a
fence around your character, and prevent even the
most distant approach of any thing that would
insult your purity or offend the most fastidious
modesty.
You have need to be upon your guard against
the influence of companionship even from your own
sex. In large establishments, or even in those of
more moderate size, there are many young women
associated together, over whom, in some cases, no
matronly superintendent is placed, and who have
an almost unrestricted opportunity for free conversation and general intercourse. It is no severe
reflection on the sex to suppose that in such a number of young persons, there may be some who have
no personal religion, whose sense of female decorum
and propriety is not the most delicate, and who,
without being vicious, are still so given to levity,
vanity, and romance, as to exert an unfavorable influence over the rest. Be upon your guard against
influence of this kind. Gain all the good, in the
way of improvement, you can, from those who are
your superiors; but avoid all the evil. Be goodtempered, accommodating, amiable, and concilia.
tory; but set yourself against all that is improper.
Be an example of all that is good, and then you
may be a reprover of all that is evil. Let there be




THE YOUNG WOMAN AWAY FROM HOME. 259
no affected superiority; nothing like "Stand by, I
am holier than thou;" but all the consistency, the
gentleness, the sweetness of unaffected goodness,
of true piety and good conduct, and then you may
be a blessing indeed to those around you. Be
especially careful in the selection from the rest of
your companions of one particular friend. Be not
led away by specious appearances, nor induced to
commit yourself by professions of friendship on the
part of another, or by the first feelings of partiality
on your own; but take time to ascertain the correctness of her principles, the consistency of her
conduct, and the respectability of her family; otherwise you may be led into snares and dangers which
you very little anticipate.
For your conduct toward those who employ you,
if it be a master, I refer you back to what is said
to the governess. Instances have occurred to my
knowledge to prove that cautions on this head are
not altogether unnecessary. An evil eye has sometimes lighted on an unsuspecting female, and men,
bound by every tie of honor and by their solemn
vow to a wife, have been base enough to assail, and
in some instances to destroy, the purity, the honor,
the peace, if not the life, of those whom they were
bound in duty to protect. Spurn, then, with disdain
and indignation any such attempts-receive no
special attention from, and quit the service of, the
wretch whom you suspect of a design against that
which ought to be dearer to you, a thousand times
over, than even life itself.
-1~




260         YOUNG WOMAN'S GUIDE.
Female servants are a most important and a very
numerous class of young women away from home,
and often a very destitute and much exposed one.
Their case, however, is so needful of enlarged counsel and caution, that I shall refer them to a Tract
I have written and published specially for their
benefit.*
I shall now conclude by some few general remarks, which will apply to all classes alike of those
who are away from home.
Again and again I say, commit yourselves by
true faith in Christ into the hands of God for protection and consolation. How many beautiful passages and examples of Holy Scripture, in addition
to those already quoted, could be adduced, which
apply with peculiar force to your case. Look at
poor Hagar, much to be pitied as well as much to
be blamed, alone in the wilderness, "when the
angel of the Lord found her by the fountain of
water, and she called the name of the Lord that
spake unto her, Thou God seest me." If, notwithstanding some misconduct and some self-reproach
when God found her there, she comforted herself in
that desolate place with the consideration that she
was compassed about with the presence of the
Lord; with how much greater confidence and peace
may you cheer your heart with the thought of an
ever-present God, you who have not been driven
out as she was by misconduct from her home, but
have been led out by Providence friom yours. Yes,
* "Advice to Female Servants."




THE YOUNG WOMAN AWAY FROM HOME. 261
God is in every place-he is with you-" he corn
passeth your path, he knoweth your down-sitting
and up.rising, and is acquainted with all your
ways." You have left your earthly father, but
your heavenly one is with you. You are far from
your earthly home, but if you are a Christian, you
are as near as ever to your heavenly one. The
eyes that lately beamed affection upon you, see you
not now, and you see not them; but lifting your
voice to God, you can say, " Thou God seest me!"
His eye is upon you-his heart yearns over youhis arms are underneath you. Then, what promises are on record for you. Do you fear the
want of adequate provision?-" Trust in the Lord,
and do good! so shalt thou dwell in the land, and
verily thou shalt be fed" —Psalm xxxvii. 3. Do
you want protection?-" He that dwelleth. in the
secret place of the Most High, shall abide under
the shadow of the Almighty. He shall cover thee
with his feathers, and under his wings shalt thou
trust; his truth shall be thy shield and buckler"
-Psalm xci. 1, 4.  Do you need direction?"Thine ears shall hear a voice behind thee, saying,
This is the way, walk ye in it"-Isaiah xxx. 21.
Do you dread the forlorn circumstances that await
you away from home?-" None that trust in him
shall be desolate"-Psalm  xxxiv. 22. Are you
trembling with apprehension at the absence of all
that were dear to you, and the unknown difficulties
of your new situation on earth?-" Fear thou not,
for I am with thee; be not dismayed, for I am thy




262         YCtLNG WOMAN'S GUIDE.
God: 1 will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee;
yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of
my righteousness"-Isaiah xli. 10. "My presence
shall go with you and give you rest." Do you
even dread the idea of being forgotten by the
friends you are leaving?-" Can a woman forget
her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yea, she may
forget, yet will I not forget thee"-Isaiah xlix. 15.
"I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee"-Hebrews xiii. 5. Can any thing be more consolatory
than such assurances? Need you be afraid to leave
home and go out into the world with such promises?  What! when omnipotence, omnipresence,
omniscience, all-sufficiency, and boundless love, go
with you? Why, with such assurances you may
quit not only your father's home to dwell in some
other part of this land of railways, and easy and
speedy methods of return, but may embark on
board an emigrant ship, quit your native country to
dwell at the antipodes, and exultingly exclaim, "If
I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the
uttermost parts of the sea, even there shall Thy hand
lead me, and Thy right hand shall hold me." But,
then, to apply the truth and feel the comfort of these
precious assurances, you must have that genuine
faith which alone gives you a title to them. Personal religion will in all probability procure you
earthly friends wherever you go, for it is the soil in
which all those virtues grow that conciliate affection, insure respect, and invite confidence. God




THE YOUNG WOMAN AWAY FROM HOME. 263
will go before you to prepare the way for you, for
when a man's ways please the Lord. he maketh
"even his enemies to be at peace with him."
Remember how he gave Joseph favor in the eyes
of the governor of the prison, and how he turned
the heart of Esau, brooding revenge, into brotherly
endearment. The best way to get the friendship
of man is first to secure the friendship of God.
Connected with this, acquire an eminent degree
of those general good qualities already alluded to.
Add to piety amiability of disposition, kindliness
of temper, gentle, artless, and attractive manners.
Let there be a substratum of the solid gold of excellence, bearing at the same time the polish of the
amenities of life. They who have to make their
way in the world must be attentive to external, and
to what some may call little things. It is not
enough to be holy and virtuous, or even to be conscious that we are such, but we must also be attractive. You must aim to please. Real excellence
may sometimes be repulsive on account of the eccentricities, the acerbities, and blunt coarseness, with
which it is associated. It is like grapes amid nettles or thorns, which few will attempt to gather for
fear of the sting or the prickle. There is a word
of very difficult definition, but which is perfectly
understood, and very impressive, without being defined-" She is an interesting young woman."
This is a very common expression. Perhaps the
best explanation of it is, the power of giving pleasure and engaging affection. This includes, I am




264         YOUNG WOMAN'S GUIDE.
aware, more of nature than of art, and something
of personal attraction. The affectation of being interesting is sure to defeat its own end and to inspire
disgust. Yet something, if the intention be concealed, may be acquired by study. Surely it can
not be improper to ask, " How can I interest others
in my behalf2" And they who depend upon the
interest they create for themselves in the hearts of
others, should study how to insure it.
Combine a due and tender recollection of home
with a noble fortitude in surrendering its comforts.
You are not required to forget your father's house,
and your mother's endearing society. It would be
unnatural if you could. Indeed, you are in little
danger of this: "Forget thee, my honored father!
Forget thee, my much loved mother! Forget ye,
my brothers and sisters! Forget thee, sweet home
of my childhood! Oh, no. Memory must perish
before I can be guilty of such oblivion. I muse on
ye all in my solitary walks. I give up many an
hour's sleep to think of home. I wet my pillow
with my tears, as I think of the years and joys that
are gone, never to return. I drearr often that I
am in the midst of ye all, and wake to the sad
reality that I am away from home." But this is
not all the recollection you are to bear. Nor is
the frequent and affectionate letter, so welcome and
so precious to those who love and think of you, the
only way to send comfort to your parents. Let
there be the never-varying excellence of character
and conduct, the uniform good behavior, the grow



THE YOUNG WOMAN AWAY FROM HOME. 265
ing usefulness, which, on their knowing these things,
shall comfort their hearts. Let no fickleness of
disposition make you soon tired of a situation-let
no unsuitable connection of a tender nature, which
they would not approve, be formed-let no conduct
which, if they knew it, would distress them, be
carried on by you. They have lost the comfort of
your society; add not to the affliction by causing
them to lose the comfort of your character.
And now, to conclude, let your situation in a
social point of view remind you of your circumstances in a religious one. If you are a true Christian, what is your condition on earth but a child
away from home? Yes: heaven, and not earth, is
the home of the believer. How simply and sublimely beautiful is the language of our Lord: "In
my Father's house are many mansions: if it were
not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a
place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for
you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself: that where I am, there ye may be also."
Delightful idea!  Heaven is the home of the
Christian, which the Saviour has fitted up and made
ready for him. There, is God the judge of all-the
Father, of whom the whole family is named.
There, is Jesus the Mediator of the New Covenant,
who calls himself the First-born, the Elder Brother.
There, arc the spirits of just men made perfect, the
whole number of the brothers and sisters. There,
is the innumerable company of the angels, who
were as ministering spirits sent forth to minister
23




266         YOUNG WOMAN'S GUIDE.
unto the heirs of salvation.  What a glorius
household assembled in the third heavens-the
eternal home of the redeeming God, the Great
Redeemer, and the redeemed family.   Thither
you are going, if a true believer. All the dispensations of Providence, and all the means of grace
are preparing you for that station. All things
are working together for your good. Your present situation, with all its disquiet and discomfort,
may be among the means which are preparing you
for that state. You are away from home here,
that you may be at home there. Let this cheer
and comfort you. When distressed by looking
back upon the home you have left, comfort yourself by looking on to that to which you are going.
Heaven, glory, eternity, are before you. You are
educating for your father's house-preparing to go
in and dwell forever in his presence. Half a century hence at most, and in perhaps a much shorter
time than that, it will be of no consequence to you
how you passed through life. The only thing about
which you should be supremely anxious is, not to
be shut out from the heavenly home; not to be
excluded by sin, impenitence, and unbelief, from
the mansions which Christ has gone to prepare. In
the blessed hope of reaching that state, though they
were ten times greater than they are, you might
endure not only with fortitude, but with comfort,
all the trials of A YOUNG WOMAN AWAY FROM IIOME




"larartter  f adnrterk.
"And before I had done speaking in mine heart, behold, Rebekah came forth with her pitcher on her shoulder; and she went down unto the well, and drew water:
and I said unto her, Let me drink, I pray thee. And
she made haste, and let down her pitcher from her
shoulder, and said, Drink, and I will give thy camels
drink also  So I drank, and she made the camels drink
also. —GNEsIEs xxiv. 45, 46.
EVERY one must be struck, we should think,
with the construction of the narratives in the Book
of Genesis, and their adaptation to the then existing
state of the society to which they relate. Their
verisimilitude guarantees their truthfulness, and
explains their peculiarity. We find all that charming simplicity which the social condition of the
heroes and heroines of the tale supposes, together
with all their defects in conduct which their partial
instruction might be expected to bring with it.
Another kind of narrative; more in conformity
with th(e modern advances and artificial refinement
of society, would excite suspicion of the truthfulness of the story: its simplicity and its difference,
from all we know of subsequent ages, are its verification.




268        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIENd,
Where shall we find, in all the range )f fiction,
any thing so exquisite as the history of Joseph, or
even as the beautiful story contained in the chapter
which furnishes the example to be contemplated in
this discourse. We invite criticism and taste to the
investigation of this precious portion of Holy Writ.
True, it relates rather to the history of a family
than of a nation. Yes, and it is worthy of remark,
that the careful preservation in the museum of inspired chronicles, of this little gem of historic narrative, was by the Spirit of God thought to be of
more'importance than all that was going on at that
time among the. great nations of antiquity, not excepting Egypt, the birth-place and cradle of science.
The secular historian delights to emblazon his page
with the conflicts of empires, the exploits of
heroes, and the prowess of armies; but what is
the influence of such narrations upon the moral
habits, social happiness, and individual character of
mankind, compared with that of the record of the
holy courtship of Isaac and Rebekah!
Sarah, the beloved and faithful wife of Abraham,
had died, and had been laid in the cave of Machpelah. Sadness and desolation now reign in the
patriarch's household. His tent is empty; and the
grief of Isaac, who loved his mother most tenderly,
is unsoothed, upon whom the heart of the venerable
widower was now turned with more concentrated
affection. Isaac, the miraculous child of promise,
though forty years of age, was unmarried. The
holy patriarch, amid much domestic disquiet, the




CHARACTER OF REBEKAH.         269
consequence of polygamy, had known the happi.
ness of possessing a faithful and devoted wife, and
he now became naturally anxious to see his beloved
son well settled with a companion in life before he
himself should go the way of all flesh. His solicitude, however, was not merely that Isaac should be
married, but well married; which, in his view,
meant not wealthily, but religiously. He was a
worshiper of Jehovah, and abhorred idolatry, with
the votaries and practices of which he was on every
hand surrounded; and it pierced his heart with
anguish to think of the child of promise contracting
a marriage with one of these. He knew that character, as well as happiness, depends upon a suitable
connection. And more than this, it was not only a
private matter of personal and family arrangement,
involving Isaac's happiness and the comfort of his
father, but also a public concern intimately affecting
the covenant of which Abraham was the earthly
head, and the countless millions who were to be
blessed in his seed. Isaac sustained a sacred character; he was the child of promise, and inherited,
and was also to transmit, the promises concerning
the Messiah. As he had relations in the land of
Mesopotamia, who worshiped the living God, he
determined to send his confidential servant to this
family to engage a wife for Isaac. We must sup.
pose, of course, that all this was under the cognizance of Isaac, and met with his cordial support.
Parental authority was then more extensive, and
filial submission to it more exemplary, than it now
23*




270        YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
is. Parents, according to the custom of those times,
chose wives for their sons, and husbands for their
daughters; and often were regulated in their choice
more by regard to wealth and rank, than by the
adaptation and affection of the parties to be thus
united. We do not wish this custom to be revived; it is unnatural, and reduces marriage to a
matter of bargain and sale. But we do wish parental counsel, consent, and approbation to be
always sought in a matter of so much importance
to all parties, whether directly or more remotely
concerned.
The trusty servant selected by Abraham proceeded on his delicate, difficult, and, to both the
father and son, momentous mission. Not, however, till religious solemnities had been observed,
and'Eliezer had been commended by the patriarch
to God by prayer. If we wanted the character of a
faithful servant, delineated to the life, where could
we find a picture so perfect as this man? I shall
not follow him through his long and wearisome
journey of nearly five hundred miles, nor will I
dwell upon the anxious ruminations of his mind
during the weeks it occupied. Yet we can not but
imagine how constantly that mind was lifted up to
God for protection, direction, and success. He at
length arrived at the city of his destination. It was
a summer evening, and espying a well outside the
walls, he stopped to give his camels drink before he
passed through the gates. Aware that it was the
custom for the young women to come and draw
L________i-                I                  -




CHARACTER OF REBEKAH.        271
water for household purposes, he first placed his
camels by the well in a waiting posture, and then
betook himself to prayer for Divine direction.
" And he said, 0 Lord God of my master Abraham,
I pray thee send me good speed this day, and shew
kindness unto my master Abraham. Behold, I
stand here by the well of water, and the daughters
of the men of the city come out to draw water; and
let it come to pass, that the damsel to whom I shall
say, Let down thy pitcher, I pray thee, that I may
drink; and she shall say, Drink, and I will give thy
camels drink also, let the same be she that thou
hast appointed for thy servant Isaac; and thereby
shall I know that thou hast shewed kindness unto
my master." It is noticeable, that he did not fix the
sign upon the one who should first offer her services, but upon the one who first willingly grants the
service asked of her. In this he proceeds wisely,
conceiving, it would seem, that the maid shows no
maidenly spirit, who, unasked, tenders so slight a
service as a draught of water at a public well to a
stranger; and deeming, perhaps, that attention so
paid might be an excuse for curiosity, and an evidence rather of officious forwardness than of an
obliging disposition. This is worthy of notice, as
furnishing a beautiful comment upon Solomon's
advice, "In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He
shall direct thy paths." Let us thus begin, carry
on, and end, all our works in God. What is begun
in prayer, usually, as in this case, ends in praise.
So thought Eliezer, when he knelt down by the side
_________________J~~~~~~~~~



272        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
of the well of Nahor, and poured out this simple
and beautiful prayer. In his case it might be well
enough, but ordinarily it does not become us to ask,
much less to prescribe, special tokens by which God
shall indicate his will.
Having presented his prayer, he waited for the
answer, and waited in faith that he should receive
it. He did not wait long. There came a damsel,
with a pitcher upon her shoulder, toward the well.
By her appearance, perhaps by an impression from
God, he is possessed with the idea that she is the
person sought, and that the Lord hath answered his
prayer. He therefore addressed her in the very
language he had resolved to employ, and received
the very answer, which was to be the sign of her
being the object of his mission. The gentleness,
cheerfulness, assiduity, and courtesy, manifested
toward a stranger, of whom she could have no
knowledge, are truly admirable-unmixed and uncorrupted as it was by any unbecoming forwardness
or levity. It was fiank, without being obtrusivekind, without being familiar. She neither ran away
affrighted from his presence-for her innocence gave
her courage-nor did she step beyond the decorum
of her sex, nor allow her courtesy to infringe upon
her modesty. It was good for Rebekah, that she
did not answer with a proud and haughty contempt
and a surly refusal. "Yes, and it was good for
another woman, who long after met another stranger,'wearied with his journey,' at another well, that
when she met his request,' Give me to drink,' with




CHARACTER OF REBEKAH.         273
the surly question,' How is it that thou, being a
Jew, askest drink of me who am a Samaritan V'-it
was good, I say, for her that she had a different
person from Abraham's servant to deal with." The
words in which Rebekah's answer is described, are
picturesque, lively, bland, and respectful: " Drink,
my lord; and she hasted, and let down her pitcher
upon her hand. And when she had given him
drink, she said, 1 will draw for'thy camels also,
until they have done drinking. And she hasted
and emptied her pitcher into the trough, and ran
again unto the well to draw, and drew for all
the camels." Conduct so amiable overwhelmed
Eliezer; and so slow of heart are we to believe in
the answer of our prayers, that he, " wondering at
her, held his peace, to wit whether the Lord had
made his journey prosperous or not." There are
cases in which the mind, like the eye, by a great
and sudden influx of light, is overpowered. It was
so here. Finding, at length, that this was indeed
the object of his journey, he could not repress the
feelings of his full heart, but expressed them in two
ways. The first has, in all ages and in all countries, been considered as one inlet to the female
heart-that heart which has, at any rate, been
thought "to be accessible to finery, presents, and
praise."  " For it came to pass, as the camels had
done drinking, that the man took a golden ear-ring
of half a shekel weight, and two bracelets for her
hands, of ten shekels weight of gold." But this was
not the only expression of his joy and gratitude, for,




274         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
unrestrained by the presence of Rebekah, "He
bowed down his head and worshiped, saying:
Blessed be Jehovah, God of my master Abraham,
who hath not left destitute my master, of his mercy
and his truth: I being in the way, Jehovah led me
to the house of my master's brethren." Did the
heart of Rebekah, true to instinctive perception in
all such matters, begin to divine what this present
and this praise'to God meant? Did a thought
glance across her mind of the nature of this man's
visit to Nahor? Or was the scene beheld by her
in awe and wonder at the character and errand of
the mysterious stranger? She must have known
of her august relation, Abraham, whose name she
now heard in prayer from the lips of Eliezer.
We must, for a moment, forget Rebekah, to look
upon this holy, faithful, loving domestic. Never
did piety and fidelity more truly blend the sanctity
of the one with the devotedness of the other.
Happy master, to have such a servant! Happy
servant, to be blessed with such a master!
It is not necessary for me to enter very minutely
into the incidents of the scenes which followed.
How Rebekah hasted with the intelligence of this
event to her father's house, and how Laban, her
brother, went forth to greet the stranger and conduct him to their home. We mark, as if we saw
them, the courtesy of the opening interview, the
frank interchange of kindly greetings and good offices, the admirable delicacy of the servant's introduction of himself to the family of Bethuel, the




CHARACTER OF REBEKAH.         275
servant's impatience to discharge his trust, the simple recital of what the Lord had done for him, and
the full development of the object of his visit.
Upon hearing which, Laban, as the surviving representative of his father, replied: "The thing proceedeth from the Lord; we can not speak unto thee
bad or good. Behold, Rebekah is before thee, take
her, and go, and let her be thy master's son's wife,
as the Lord hath spoken." This was dependent, as
the after part of the narrative shows, upon the
damsel's consent. To help to gain this, a second
splendid present was prepared for her, of jewels of
silver, and jewels of gold, and raiment. This was,
and is still, the Oriental custom of contracting all
bargains, and entering into all covenants, whether
for marriage, trade, or politics. Very natural was
the remonstrance which the brother, and especially
the mother of the bride, addressed to the impatient
servant of Abraham, when he said: "Send me
away to my master." And her brother and her
mother said, "Let the damsel abide with us a few
days, at the least ten; after that she shall go."
Whether it be a respite of ten days, or, as some
say, of ten months, or even years, that the mother
joined with her son in soliciting, before the daughter bids her a last adieu, it is a touch of genuine
tenderness, such as we should not willingly lose
from the narrative. For it is a narrative which
proves its own truth by its being so thoroughly,
and all throughout, true to nature. Rebekah was
now called in, and the question placed to her,




276         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
"Wilt thou go with this man?"  Was she deficient
in virgin modesty, in prudence, in thoughtfulness?
Did she display an unseemly haste to become a
wife? Did she venture too carelessly to commit
herself and her happiness for life to one of whom
she knew nothing but by report? Did she not take
the decisive step in the dark, when she consented
to peril in such haste the comfort of her life, upon
the truth of the singular embassy that had come to
her? In ordinary circumstances, we should unquestionably reply in the affirmative to these questions;
and we should earnestly recommend to all young
females now, and to all who have the care of them,
whether parents or guardians, more delay, inquiry,
and caution, than were observed in this case.
Hasty offers of marriage should be met either by
hasty refusals, or lengthened consideration. It is
too momentous an affair to be decided without
much investigation and reflection. But there was
a peculiarity here. Something, perhaps, may be
justly imputed to the times, but far more to the
religious state of Rebekah's mind; a sense of duty
overwhelmed a feeling of reluctance, together with
every inferior consideration. She was doubtless in
the habit of daily intercourse with God, and in
fervent prayer had sought Divine direction; she
saw an overruling Providence-God was in the
affair-his finger, visible to the eye of faith, pointed
out the way in which she should go; and with unhesitating obedience, she confessed her readiness to
part with all the &licities of home, to seek a dis



CHARACTER OF REBEKAH.         277
tant alliance, at the voice of that Sovereign Power
to whom' she committed her future destiny. Flattering as the scene before her must have appeared
to a worldly eye, the sacrifices she made at this
moment of compliance were certainly very considerable. What could have led to such an answer,
when standing between the tears of parental and
fraternal affection, and the urgency of a mere stranger, the servant, too, of her future home, but a faith
which overcame the world, and dictated her holy
resolution.  Heaven appointed her journey, and
nature pleaded in vain.*  That religion had something to do with it, I have no doubt-that the
promptings of the female heart had also some influence, I have as little doubt. "What woman," says
Monod, "under a sense of her dependence, has not
wished, once in her life, for the arm of a man to
support her, and his name to shelter her? But at
the same time, what woman, under the feeling of
reserve, has not kept her secret closely shut up
within her own bosom, waiting silently till she is
sought for, even though she should wait till the
hour of her death, hastened, perhaps, in some cases,
by that internal fire by which she would be consumed within, rather than suffer it to be blazed
abroad. The invariable order of marriage, which
cedes the initiative to man, and does not accord
even the appearance of it to woman, is not a refinement of civilization; it is not even a nicety of the
gospel; it is a law imposed on woman in every
* See Dr. Cox's " Female Scripture Biography."
24 ______




278        YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
age, not excepting the most barbarous,  among
all people, not excepting the most sava."  Rebekah partook of this feeling, but she worshiped the
true God, and lived amid those who worshiped
idols, where, perhaps, few opportunities of a holy
union presented themselves; and now a most advantageous one offered, in which all that piety could
desire, or even vanity crave, were combined; which,
therefore, required little or no time to deliberate
upon, and she at once consented to accompany the
servant of Abraham.
Rebekah took leave of her friends, and proceeding
on her eventful journey under the care of Eliezer,
and accompanied, both for her comfort and her protection, by Deborah, an old faithful servant, who had
nursed her from a child.
For a moment we leave Rebekah, proceeding on
her journey, to speak of her future husband, of whom
good Bishop Hall says, " Of all the patriarchs, none
made so little noise in the world as Isaac; none lived
either so privately, or so innocently; neither know
I whether he proved himself a better son or husband.
For the one, he gave himself over to the knife of his
father when about to be offered up in sacrifice, and
mourned three years for his mother; for the other,
he reserved himself in chaste forbearance twenty
years, and prayed."  He appears to have been a
-quiet, retiring, domestic, and devotional charactergood rather than great, and altogether blameless,
with the exception that he was a little too much addicted to the gratifications of the palate.




CHARACTER OF REBEKAII.       279
" It was a calm and peaceful summer evening.
The oxen have been lodged in their stalls, and the
implements of husbandry are at rest in the furrows
of the field. Not a breath of wind rustles in the
noiseless leaves. Not a stray sheep wanders in the
dark shadow of the hills. It is a time of profound
repose. One solitary figure is seen slowly pacing
the sweet-scented meadow path. Unconscious of
nature's charms, altogether his soul is melted into
sweet harmony with the peace that reigns all around,
he is wrapt in holy fellowship with the God of his
salvation." It is Isaac, " who had gone out into the
fields to meditate." No improper oratory for the
good man, who, surrounded by the glories of creation, looks through nature up to nature's God.
In such an exercise and such a frame of mind, Isaac
was well prepared to receive the best possible earthly
blessing-a good wife. Perhaps he was then meditating upon Eliezer's mission, and beseeching Heaven
for its success. Behold the answer of his prayers!
A cavalcade is seen in the distance approaching. It
draws nearer and nearer. Can it be the return of
Eliezer, the faithful servant? And are there not
two females in the retinue, one young and the other
further advanced in life? The vision of his future
wife now flashed through his imagination, as the
procession drew nearer, and his eyes with fixed attention rested upon the beauteous form of Rebekah.
"And who," says Rebekah, whose eyes are as busy
in looking toward Canaan as Isaac's are in the di
rection of Mesopotamia, "'is that meditative man




280         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
approaching us?"  The secret is disclosed by the
faithful, joyful Eliezer. "Your future husband."
As she approached her destined lord, see how female
delicacy, how maiden diffidence and reserve, resume
their empire. "She alighted off the camel, and
took a vail and covered herself." This act had more
meaning than one; it expressed her subjection, as
his already espoused wife, to him as her future husband: it would also prevent that confusion which
the suddenness of the interview and the important
consequences that were to follow it, would naturally
produce. "And Isaac brought her into his mother
Sarah's tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his
wife, and he loved her: and Isaac was comforted
after his mother's death." In this tender manner
does this admirable story close.
Peace be to that dwelling, the residence of a dutiful son, and a tender husband, and of a kind, generous, open-hearted, pious wife. Dutiful sons promise to be affectionate husbands; and were I a woman, and received an offer of marriage, one of the
first inquiries I would make concerning the man
who solicited my hand and heart, would be, "How
did he behave to his mother?" feeling assured that
conjugal affection could scarcely be expected to
dwell in that heart from which filial regard had
been excluded. He who is insensible to a mother's
tender affection, believe me, my young friends, is
not to be intrusted with the care of a woman's
heart and happiness. " We may here pause and
renark, that all the circumstances continue to make




CHARACTER OF REBEKAH.         281
this portion of the sacred record peculiarly attractive. In reading it, we feel at home amid these patriarchal incidents and descriptions, realizing them
as if they were familiar. The stately pomp and
ceremony-the reserve, and coldness, and suspicion,
of a more artificial, social state, pass away. The
freshness of nature's early truth and tenderness
returns-artless, guileless, fearless. We breathe a
purer and freer air. Vwe are touched with a deeper
sense at once of a special Providence in heaven,
and of a real and true sympathy on earth. We
feel that there can be such a thing as the exercise
of a frank and generous trust, relying both upon
God and upon nan; and that it is possible to act
upon the belief both of God's superintendence, and
of man's sincerity."*
Before we consider what is to be learned from the
conduct of Rebekah as a wife and a mother, we will
for a few moments contemplate her in reference to
that act which made her such-her marriage. The
circumstances connected with this were peculiar to
the times, and partook of a simplicity, as we have
already remarked, to which your history, my young
friends, is not likely to supply a parallel. One
thing, however, may be noticed-it was with the
privity and consent of her friends. We can not account for the fact of Bethuel, Rebekah's father,
being passed over in silence, and Laban, her
brother, only being mentioned as conducting the
* Dr. Candlish's Contributions toward the Exposition of
the Book of Genesis.
24*




282         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
transaction, but upon the supposition that Bethuel
was dead. It is true the name occurs once in the
history, but this probably was a brother. Laban
was consulted. There was nothing clandestine in
it. And, moreover, it was a marriage in which the
claims of religion were considered. On this delicate subject I can not enlarge. If Rebekah showed
too great an eagerness for quitting the single state,
and somewhat too hasty a decision, from which,
however, we have exculpated her, we do not recommend this to you. It may be natural enough to
prefer the married to the unmarried state, when an
opportunity offers for entering into it. But let not
your minds be unduly restless and anxious in realizing the object of your wishes. Avoid all romantic and poetic imaginativeness on this momentous
affair. Do not allow yourselves ever to treat it
with levity, or to dictate a line of conduct which
would look as if you were more anxious to be a
wife, than to be qualified for such a state. Never
come to the conslusion that you can not be happy
if you are not married, and can not but be happy
if you are. Let the multitude of happy maidens,
and the equal number of unhappy wives, correct
such mistakes, and dispel all the illusions with
which the idea of connubialism disturbs the propriety of some young women's conduct. Treat the
whole subject not as a matter of poetry and romance,
but as one of the gravest realities of life. It is an
affair of love, but it is also an affair of prudence. It
is a matter of taste, and even of poetic delightful.
_______________________________-_




CHARACTER OF REBEKAH.        283
ness; but it is also a matter of judgment and of
conscientiousness. It is not a thing to be laughed
and joked about, but to be pondered in the deepest
recesses of the soul, and prayed over in the most
solemn seasons of devotion. It is momentous to
both parties, but most so to the woman. "Life or
death, felicity or a lasting sorrow, are in the power
of marriage. A woman, indeed, ventures most, for
she hath no sanctuary to retire to from an evil husband. She must dwell upon her sorrow, and hatch
the eggs which her folly or her infelicity hath produced; and she is more under it, because her tormentor hath a warrant of prerogative, and the
woman may complain to God,. as subjects do of
tyrant princes; but otherwise she hath no appeal
in the causes of'unkindness. And even of the man
we may say, though he can run from many hours of
his sadness, yet he must return to it again, and
when he sits among his neighbors, he remembers
the objection that lies in his bosom, and he sighs
deeply."*
This is no time, nor is there room, to lay down
many rules for your guidance in this affair. When,
however, it comes in your way, consult not only
your heart, and your imagination, and your young
companions-but your judgment, your God by
prayer, and your parents for advice. Enter into
no acquaintance without the cognizance of these
natural guides and guardians of your youth. It is
at the beginning of connections of this kind that
* Bishop Jeremy Taylor's " Marriage Ring."




284         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
parental counsel should be sought. Never commit
yourselves by a word till the domestic oracle has
been consulted; nor allow your affections to be
entangled till a father's and a mother's judgment
have been pronounced. Determine that similarity
of taste, especially in the most important of all
matters-RELIGION-shall lie at the basis of any
union you may form.
Should it be that God has not destined you to
wedded bliss, forget not " that there are advantages
peculiar to single life-that it affords an immunity
from many cares, an opportunity for intellectual
pursuits, a power to do good extensively, which
married women may not enjoy. And if these privileges are improved, if cheerfulness and benevolence characterize the temper, there will be no
want of occupation, of happiness, or of sympathy.
The kind sister or aunt will be always welcomed;
she will be hailed as the agreeable companion, or
the tender nurse; as the participator in joy, or the
sympathizer in sorrow; as the helper in business,
or the companion in affliction; she will be the
ready assistant in every good work-the children
will run to greet her arrival, the poor will rise up
and call her blessed. And if in truth, as we do see
in some bright examples in our own day, her energy
grows with her desire of doing good, and in the
assiduous and pains-taking efforts of Christian char.
ity, she seems to forget the weakness of her sex,
she realizes in one of its most pleasing forms prim.
itive devotedness. In pious exercises more spir




CHARACTER OF REBEKAH.         285
itual, in self-denial more mortified, in faith more
pure, than any of the cloistered nuns of the strictest
habit; while at the same time her religion is without superstition, and her sobriety without gloom.
She is one of a holy sisterhood, whose order is truly
catholic, whose vows are scriptural, and whose voluntary service is the labor of love."
We now turn over another chapter in the history
of Rebekah, in which she appears to far less advantage than she does in the one we have just reviewed,
where the artless simplicity of the virgin is lost in
the crooked policy of the designing wife and the too
partial mother. Perhaps, it will be thought by
some, that as I am addressing young women, I
might have cut short the story with her marriage
and her virtues, and drawn a vail over her future
failings. But I bear in recollection what I said in a
former sermon, that the matron should be held up
to the maiden, that from the outset she may learn
what to copy and what to avoid. And here is a
striking example to serve this purpose, an affecting
instance to prove what a transformation a change
of circumstances may produce in the same character.
Isaac and Rebekah, like Abraham and Sarah, had
their faith tried in waiting long for the son who
was to be the heir of promnise. Twenty years
elapsed and Rebekah bore no child. In answer to
the earnest prayers of her husband, God gave her
the prospect of becoming a mother. Before this
happy event took place she received a communica



286        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
tion from the Lord, that she should give birth to
twins, who should be the heads of two separate
nations, and that, contrary to the order of nature
and the custom of nations, the elder brother should
serve the younger. Esau and Jacob were born,
grew up, and exhibited great difference of taste and
character. Into this family of Isaac and Rebekah,
there entered that which has rent myriads and
myriads of households, setting the husband against
the wife, the mother against the father, and one
child against another; disturbing the harmony of
domestic peace, poisoning the springs of domestic
happiness, and preventing the progress of domestic
improvement-I mean parental partiality. In this
case of Isaac and Rebekah, both parents had their
favorite child, and what was worse, manifested their
fondness. It may, in some cases, be almost impossible not to have a preference for one -child above
another; but what anxious carefulness should there
be to conceal it; policy and justice both demand
from parents an equal distribution of their affection,
their countenance, and their goods; for if there be
one folly which more certainly punishes itself than
another, it is this ill-judged and wicked distinction
between equals. Parental partiality injures both
the one preferred and the one that is slighted; inflating the one with pride, insolence, and vanity,
and corrupting the other by jealousy, envy, and
revenge. Isaac loved Esau, and for a reason not
very honorable to his character, "because he did
eat of his venison." Rebekah loved Jacob, for
I________




CHARACTER OF REBEKAH.         287
what reason we are not told; it is probable on
account both of his superior excellence, and also of
the revelation which God had made to her concerning his future history. She was undoubtedly a
woman of sincere faith, and even her after-censurable conduct arose from a misdirected piety. She,
like another female in after times, pondered in her
heart all the things which had been spoken of God
concerning this child of promise. It was not long
before the effects of parental partiality appeared in
this family. A competition for precedence, and the
right of primogeniture, engaged the attention of the
brothers, and whetted their spirits against each
other from their earliest years, which issued in
alienation, separation, and hostility, on the part of
the children, and sorrow and distress on the part
of the parents. Jacob's conduct was ungenerous,
and Esau's profane. The former knew his destination to precedence, and instead of leaving God to
fulfill his own purpose, sought to accomplish it in
a manner unworthy both of himself and of the
blessing.
Time, which moves on with ceaseless tread, had
brought Isaac to old age; and he now thought of
his approaching end, and the propriety of settling
his domestic affairs. His great concern was to
direct the descent of the patriarchal blessing, which,
in this case, implied more than that ordinary benediction which every good man would pronounce on
all his children, without distinction; it comprehended the great things contained in the covenant
________________




288         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
with Abraham, by which his posterity was to be
selected and distinguished as the peculiar people
of God, and to give birth to the Messiah. Isaac
ought to have remembered the communication made
to Rebekah, and by her, doubtless, to himself, that
this was to be bestowed upon Jacob.   Natural
attachment for a while overcame his faith, and he
was preparing to divert the blessing from the channel marked out for it by the purpose and providence
of God. To enkindle his affection for Esau, by the
remembrance of past gratifications, he wished to
have some savory meat-certainly a carnal introduction to so divine an act, partaking more of the
flesh than of the spirit, and betraying more of that
parental partiality under which he had acted, than
of the faith of a son of Abraham.  Behold, of
what importance it is that our early propensities be
good, seeing time, indulgence, and habit, interweave
them with our very constitution, till they become a
second nature, and age confirms instead of eradicating them. We find the two great infirmities of
Isaac's character predominant to the last-a disposition to gratify his palate with a particular kind of
food, and partiality to his son Esau.
Rebekah, whose affection was ever wakeful, active, and jealous for her favorite, overheard the
charge given by her husband to Esau, and instantly
set about a scheme to divert the blessing into
another, and, as she knew, into its right channel.
What should she have done? Expostulated with
Isaac on the impropriety of acting in direct oppo.




CHARACTER OF REBEKAH.        289
sition to the revealed purpose of God. Such an
appeal, to a mind devout and contemplative, as
his evidently was, notwithstanding its weaknesses,
would, in all probability, have succeeded. Instead
of this, she manifested what has ever been considered to be one of woman's infirmities, a disposition
to have recourse to finesse, stratagem, and maneuver, and a wish to carry her object by tortuous
and complicated measures, rather than by an open
and straightforward course. It is unnecessary for
me to enter into the details of her plan, its prompt
execution, and its success. It is a sad story. Here
was nothing but shameless trickery and imposition
-a feigned person-a feigned name-feigned venison-a feigned answer.  Every thing was bad,
except the motive, and that could not alter the
character of the action, and transmute evil into
good.  It was a disgrace to Rebekah, a cruelty
practiced upon Isaac, and a most grievous injury
inflicted on the moral character of her son. We
must not load Jacob with more of the infamy of
this transaction than what really belongs to him.
He was not first in the transgression. His feelings
revolted from it when it was proposed to him. IIe
remonstrated against it. His remonstrance, however, was founded more upon the consequences of
the evil than the evil itself. And there is a striking
difference between his reasoning and that of his son
Joseph. Jacob said, "I shall bring a curse upon
me, and not a blessing:" but Joseph's pious and
noble reply was, " How can I do this great wicked25




290         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
ness, and sin against God?"  The resoluteness of
Rebekah is astounding and affecting, confirming the
general opinion that woman, in a bad purpose, is
often more bold and determined than man. " Upor
7ne be thy curse, my son; only obey my voice."
Appalling spectacle! to see a mother, a religious
mother, so far forgetting what is due to her sex, her
relationship, and her piety, as not only to lead, but
to goad and drag on, her son, to perpetrate falsehood, and to practice deception, upon his half-blind
father. O mothers, read this account and tremble!
The plan moves forward, but the whole plot was
in danger of exploding. The conference between
Isaac and his son Jacob is deeply affecting. The
half-awakened suspicion and artless simplicity of
the father, invests, by the power of contrast, with
deeper shades of infamy and guilt, the shameless,
undaunted effrontery of the son. Such is the way
of transgressors, one sin prepares for, and leads on
to another, till the sinner is involved, by a kind of
necessity, to add another and another lie, to help on
the former one. Isaac's ears were truer than his
eyes, and his faculties were not so blunted by age,
as not to be capable of reasoning upon some improbabilities; for there is something about falsehood,
which, though it may silence, yet will not ordinarily
satisfy. Craft, however, in this case, is too deep for
honesty, and Isaac, kind and incredulous to evil
thoughts, soon finds his suspicions lulled, eats the
venison, and bestows the blessing. It is no part of
my lecture to paint, or rather copy, the scene which




CHARACTER OF REBEKAH.         291
followed, when the return of Esau revealed the
plot, and proclaimed the deception. The shock to
poor old Isaac was almost overwhelming. As an
aged and afflicted man, the imposition which had
been practiced upon him would excite his indignation. Yet a moment's reflection would convince
him of his mistake, in intending to convey to Esau
that blessing which God designed for Jacob. Such
considerations rushing upon his mind at once, sufficiently account for all his feelings: it was to him
like a place where two seas meet, or as the union
of subterranean fires and waters, which causeth the
earth to tremble. Esau is to be pitied, and would
be more so, if his distress arose from any other
feelings than disappointed ambition. He who profanely despised the birthright, cared nothing for
the loss of the blessing, but as it deprived him
of some earthly distinctions and temporal possessions.
Rebekah's policy had succeeded. But she soon
began to reap its bitter fruits, in perceiving the
feud which she had occasioned between the two
brothers. The same tent could no longer contain
them. And intelligence having reached her that
Esau meditated revenge, even to the murder of
his fraudulent brother, she hurried away Jacob to
the land of Padan-Aram, to seek a protection and
a home among her own relatives. With the sequel
of this interesting story you are acquainted, and we
return to Rebekah. The best explanation that can
be given of her conduct, and which has been put




292        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
forth by her apologists as her defense, is that she
acted from religious motives. Perhaps this is in
part true; but I think not wholly. There is much
of the mother mixed up with the believer; and no
small share of regard for the interests of a favorite
child, blended with regard to the purposes of God.
But be it so, that religion had the principal hand in
this odious deception, then we see how early pious
frauds were practiced for the furtherance of the
faith; and Rebekah, so far as this part of her conduct is concerned, is presented to us as the patroness of Jesuitism; for even if we concede to her a
religious end, we must admit she adopted the most
sinful means to obtain it. She was unquestionably
right in her belief that God designed the blessing
for Jacob, and in this one respect, I mean her faith,
she was stronger and more unswerving than her
husband. Yet this faith was mixed with some unbelief after all: for what else was it but a partial
distrust, that led her to adopt such sinful means to
secure the accomplishment of the divine purpose?
Does God's truth require man's falsehood to fulfill
it? Can not we leave God to find means to perform his own word, without supposing he requires
our sins to help him out of a dilemma? The
urgency of the temptation was, no doubt, very great.
In her view, an hour or two would decide the mat.
ter, and the blessing intended for Jacob would be
transferred to Esau, and how then would the declaration be fulfilled?  That was no part of her
concern.
L1________




CHARACTER OF REBEKAI.         293
Let us now relinquish the history, and learn the
lessons with which it is fraught. The Scripture
narratives are intended to exhibit holiness and sin
embodied in living characters, the one for our imitation, and the other for our warning. And not unfrequently we find both sin and holiness blended in
the same character, requiring a careful analysis and
an accurate discrimination. This discrimination is
requisite in looking at the character now before us.
As you see Rebekah with her pitcher on her
shoulder coming to draw water, you can not fail to
notice her domestic and industrious habits. Yes, it
was when thus occupied, and not when indolently reclining upon the couch of ease-nor when sauntering with a company of associates as idle and as gossiping as herself-nor when wasting her time in
useless occupations of frivolity and amusement,
that Eliezer met her. No; but, though high-born,
wealthy, and beautiful, bearing upon her shoulder
the pitcher to the well, to draw the evening's supply of water for the family. I admit that the artificial habits of society had not then introduced those
distinctions in household occupations which the advance of civilization has now brought into. our hab-.
itations. At that time, and long since, the women
of wealthy families were engaged in services, which
are now with propriety consigned to hired servants.
There was nothing unseemly then in the daughters of rank being found with their pitcher upon
their shoulder at the public well. This, or any
thing like it now, would be altogether out of char25*




294        YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
acter. I have, however, not only heard of, but
have known at least one, who though high-born, yet
under the influence of mistaken views of the obli.
gations of religion, performed those menial services
which belong to, and are usually discharged by,
domestics. Surely this "voluntary humility," as
the apostle calls it-this unprescribed, factitious
lowliness, does neither honor to its subject nor good
to Christianity; for when mistresses thus do the
work of servants, servants by a natural ambition
and exchange will seek to take the place of mistresses. We ask no woman to step out of her
place, or to descend from her rank, but only to be
industrious in the domestic duties which belong to
it. Every young woman should aim to be useful
at home, and that is not a wise or good mother who
does not train her daughters for such occupations.
But as we have already dwelt on this, it is not
necessary to enlarge upon it here, any further than
to say, that humble yet useful employments of domestic life, are a virtuous woman's most honorable
station; that whether in single life, wedlock, or
widowhood, God and nature have destined you, my
female friends, to occupation, not perhaps highly
honorable in the eyes of unfeeling wealth or giddy
dissipation, but highly consequential to the happiness of others, and therefore essential to your own.
We can not fail to notice in Rebekah's early deportment, an artless, unaffected simplicity, affect.
ingly in contrast with her subsequent artifice and
duplicity. This it is which invests her character,




CHARACTER OF REBEKAH.         295
and most of the excellent ones in Scripture, with
such irresistible charms. To whatever we look, wc
find that simplicity is beauty. This is true of
nature as the great model. Amid all its grandeur
and complexity, all is easy and inartificial, as if its
most perfect elaboration were unelaborated, and
flowed without effort from power in repose, though
actually in operation; and thus gave the character
of its own graceful ease to all its productions.
Simplicity is no less beautiful in art than in nature,
and the very perfection of art is to hide itself in
copying the simplicity of nature. All this holds
good of manners-there, especially, affectation is
hateful and repulsive. Studied display of any kind,
whether of intellect or virtue, of conversation or
even of pronunciation, or of singularity, whether in
dress or habits, is always odious. It can not secure
respect, but must excite ridicule. Perhaps this is
one of the principal follies against which women,
and especially young women of education, have to
guard. An artificial character has sometimes a
deep, even a moral meaning, as signifying a tendency to artifice, equivocation, and resemblances of
virtue not really possessed. This, in its fixed and
consolidated form, is hypocrisy, the most odious
vice on earth. But what I refer to now is artificial
ness of manners; an obvious aim to be precise
above all others; a studied mannerism for the purpose of display. This generally springs from that
vanity which has been considered by many female
writers as one of the foibles of their sex. The
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296         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
prevalence of this really spoils many otherwise
useful and amiable characters. It is in woman
what ambition is in man; and though it may be a
less dangerous, it is a meaner fault; and it is a
form of self-love equally jealous and insatiate.
Nothing can be more opposite to the spirit of the
gospel, and the only security against it is Christian
humility. Be clothed, young women, with this; it
is your most becoming and beautiful garment; and
where will you obtain it but from the wardrobe of
Christianity?
Observe the courteous affability of this interesting young woman. Here was a stranger, a servant,
though evidently of no mean master; and yet how
respectful, how gentle, how affable was her address.
Josephus, fond of adding, in his paraphrastic manner, to the terseness and simplicity of the Scripture narrative, relates that there were other young
females with Rebekah, who were asked for water,
but refused; and that she reproved them for their
churlishness.  Courtesy is a becoming grace in
both sexes, but most so in the female; while rudeness, which is a blemish upon other characters, is a
blot upon hers. A female churl is a kind of monstrosity, from which we turn away with insufferable
disgust. Courtesy is one of the cheapest exercises
of virtue, it costs us less even than rudeness; for
the latter, except in hearts that are petrified into
stone, must put the subject of it to some expense
of feeling.  Even a rough voice is disagreeable
issuing from female lips, much more a rough man



CHARACTER OF REBEKAH.         297
ner connected with a female form. There may be
various things which prevent the exercise of court
esy. In some cases, it is to be traced to pride, a
vice which befits a demon, but not a woman. In
others it is the result of absolute ill-nature, a morose,
sour, and ill-conditioned mind, which knows no
genial seasons, and experiences no soft emotions.
Some are petulant and irascible, and, when putting
on a mood of civility, are easily driven from it by
the slightest touch of their diseased irritability.
Be courteous, then; it is, if not of the solid substance of holiness, at least its polish. It is a Christian grace, for an apostle has said * "Be pitiful; be
courteous."
Akin to this was Rebekah's kindness. There
was not only an external affability of manner, but
a real benevolence of disposition. Here was a
stranger, tired and faint with a day's journey in a
hot country, asking her kind offices to procure a
supply of water for himself and his weary beasts.
To grant his request for himself, would have cost
her no great labor; but it must have been considerable effort to draw water enough for a number
of thirsty camels! And this is more apparent
when you know the construction of Eastern wells,
which are not like ours, but are a kind of sunken
cistern, to which you descend by a flight of steps.
How many tiresome descents must this young
creature have made, before she satisfied the thirst
of Eliezer's camels. And there is another little
circumstance which marks her kindness; Eliezer




298        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
asked only for a " sip" of water, for so the original
word signifies, and she said: " Drink, and thy
camels." It was a solitary act, I admit; but it
was so promptly, so generously done, as to indicate habits. It is said, with as much beauty as
simplicity, "Love is kind;" and, if possible, with
still greater beauty, it is described as one of the
traits of the virtuous woman-" In her tongue is
the law of kindness"-and here, as it does in all
cases, the tongue commands the hand. Insensibility
in a man is bad enough, but worse in a woman.
An unfeeling woman is a contradiction of her sex,
for the female heart has ever been found the dwelling-place of kindness, where misery, driven from
every other heart, is sure to find an asylum. In
what age, or in what country of the world, has woman forfeited her character as the ministering angel
of humanity? When and where has the female
bosom abjured the claims of misery, and repudiated
the virtue of benevolence? Arctic snows have not
frozen up the spring of mercy in the female heart,
nor tropical suns evaporated it. Tyranny has not
crushed it out, nor barbarism extinguished it.
Look at Mungo Park, the African traveler, when
alone in the midst of Africa, and lying down to die
in want and despair, found by the black women of
that dark land, carried to their tent, fed, clad, and
cherished, amid the wild strains of their impromptu
song, with which they cheered the feelings of his
heart, and expressed the benevolence of their own.
Young women, cherish in your bosoms the purest




CHARACTER OF REBEKAH.        299
philanthropy. Abhor selfishness-you are made
for kindness. Oppose not the design of your Creator. Do no violence to your own nature. A
stony heart becomes not you. A tearless woman
is a revolting scene in our sorrowful world. She
may be pure and beautiful as the marble statue,
but if, withal, she is as hard and cold, who can admire her?
I -can not yet pass from the contemplation of
this sweet and amiable young creature, to behold
her in her future character, till I have referred again
to the vail of modesty under which all this affability
and kindness was concealed. In listening to her
language, in witnessing her conduct, will the most
fastidious, or prudish, or censorious of her sex, find
aught in any thing she said or did to condemn 
Did she violate, in the' smallest measure, the decorum of her sex? She did not stand to gaze upon
the stranger and his camels, nor do any thing to
attract his attention, but was intent upon the object
for which she came, and was diverted from it only
by an opportunity thrown in her way, without being sought for, to do good. She did not anxiously
and confidently enter into discourse with the man,
but waited till she was addressed, and then modestly answered him, with all the decorum due to
her sex. Virgin modesty, I know, is the most
attractive of all female graces. What is intelligence without it, but the bolder impudence; or
beauty, but the more seductive snare? There is, I
know, a reserve that degenerates into repulsive




300         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
pride, as, on the other hand, there is a frankness
that corrupts into forwardness. Woman is intended
neither to avoid man by a bashful timidity, nor to
court him by an obtrusive advance. A genuine
modesty guards against each extreme. It is that
semi-transparent vail, which, by revealing half her
excellence, makes that more lovely which it reveals,
and excites desire to know the rest. It is her shield
as well as her vail, repelling all the darts which,
either by acts, by words, or by looks, any one
would dare assail her purity. It is also her ornament, investing all her other excellences with additional charms, like the blush of purity upon the
cheek of beauty. It is her power, by which she
subdues the heart that is worth the conquest. Yea,
what is not modesty to woman? Let not down
your vail, young women. Cast not away your
shield.  Rifle not yourselves of your brightest
ornament. Enfeeble not your power to influence
others. Avoid every thing in which the absence
of this virtue can show itself. See how the want
of it is reproved by the prophet Isaiah iii. 16-19;
and the practice of it is enjoined by the apostle
Paul: "That women adorn themselves in modest
apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not
with broidered hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly
array, but which becometh women professing godliness, with good works"-1 Tim. ii. 9, 10. Neither
in dress, nor in conversation, nor in action, nor in
the toleration in your presence of improper discourse, violate this law.  Chastity is the robe
__             _   _           __-_      I




CHARACTER OF REBEKAH.        301
which every woman should wear, and of which
modesty is the golden clasp that keeps it upon
her, or the fringe that adorns it; and when the
clasp is lost, the garment is likely to fall off; and
when the fringe is torn away, or carelessly allowed
to be trampled upon, the first dilapidation of the
robe has commenced, till at length it is cast
away as a disfigured garment, not worth being
retained.
I do not wish you to mistake a silly and affected
bashfulness for modesty. You live not among
Asiatic ignorance, tyranny, sensuality, and female
degradation, where woman is used mainly to pander
to the appetite of her lord, and where by a cruel
jealousy she is excluded from intercourse with all
but her fellow-slaves and their common tyrant.
You are the women of an enlightened age and
country, where you are admitted on equal terms to
all the enjoyments of social intercourse. Assert in
this respect your rights; maintain your standing,
and while you throw off all boldness, cast away
with it all unworthy bashfulness. In one of our
previous sermons we remarked that the over-prudish
mind, which can never speak to one of the opposite
sex but with a blush, is not always the purest one
in reality.
There are, my young friends, one or two momentous lessons for you to learn from Rebekah's
conduct in after-life-lessons which you must carry
with you through all your future existence on earth.
The first is general-a change of circumstances often
26




302        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
produces a considerable change of character and
conduct. How unlike the maid of Nahor was the
wife in Canaan! And is it an uncommon thing
now, for a change far more extensive and more
painful than this to be effected by the new condition into which marriage brings the female character? Learn also this special lesson-that we
should never seek a good end by bad means; or in
other words, never do evil that good may come.
Abhor the great principle and favorite maxim of
Jesuitisn, that the end sanctifies the means; and
especially in reference to religion, abhor the application and operation of this most detestable principle-a principle which is more or less interwoven
with the whole history of Popery. What crimes
have been perpetrated by the zealots of Rome in
the abused name of religion, for the good of the
church! The pages of history which record the
progress of that dreadful apostacy are not only
stained with blood, but steeped in it. And even by
other professing Christians, holding a purer creed,
and animated by a milder spirit, how much has
been done, ostensibly for religion, but really for
sectarianism, which is contrary to every principle
of both the law of love to God, and love to our
neighbor. Religion refuses to be served by any
principles of action but its own, and disdains to
accept whatever is offered it, that is contrary to
truth, love, holiness, and honor.  And as the
stronger our zeal is for an object, the more we are
in danger of resorting, in times of difficulty or in




CHARACTER OF REBEKAH.        303
prospect of defeat, to unworthy means; so the more
fervent we are to promote any religious cause,
the more watchful we should be against being
seduced into the use of unholy means to obtain
success. The wife of Isaac was right in her object,
but wrong in her means to obtain the blessing for
Jacob.
But we must take leave of Rebekah. It is somewhat remarkable that the sacred narrative takes no
notice of her death. Is it that this act of her history
has so disrobed her character of its pristine beauty,
that a censure is pronounced upon her by this impressive silence?' One might have hoped that she
who came upon our notice at first like a bright and
lovely vision, would have been seen to depart with
as much gracefulness, simplicity, and beauty as she
exhibited when we first saw her with such delighted
attention. Is this the only instance of painful contrast between the maid and the matron-the only
instance that has disappointed the hopes raised by
youthful excellences-the only instance in which
the full-blown flower has not answered to the bud?
Happy would it have been for thousands if it had.
Let it, then, be your first solicitude to exhibit in
your early life and single state all those general
and moral beauties which form the character of
virgin excellence. Be holy, industrious, modest,
benevolent, and useful; inspire hope in every beholder, and awaken expectation. But, then, be ever
anxious, studious, and prayerful, that in the transition from the single to the wedded state; in the




304        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
development of the girl into the woman, all that
was lovely, and artless, and simple in youthful
charms, shall, with unbroken and unvarying consistency, ripen into all that is holy, and estimable,
and venerable in the wife, the mother, and the
matron.
L _ _ ___-          -                     - _~____




t OrnuamuratS ut nn &Bnr1k  malt Trnfresinu
nf SBtiginu.
"That they may adorn the doctrine of God our
Saviour in all things."-TITus ii. 10.
" Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning
of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting
on of apparel; but let it be the hidden man of the
heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of
God of great price "-1 PETER iii. 3, 4.
THERE is in human nature an instinctive propensity to decoration. To whatever principle the
taste may be traced up, whether to innate perception of the beautiful, or to a vain desire to excite
admiration, the fact is indubitable.  It is seen
equally in savage and in civilized nations: and is
manifested alike in attention both to their persons
and their dwellings, and, indeed, to all their social
customs and usages. The string of shells, of fishes'
teeth, or bits of bone, round the neck of the Polynesian, and the blaze of diamonds, or of rubies,
upon the brow or the breast of our British Queen,
indicate the same instinctive propensity.  This
taste, however in many cases it may be altogether
26*
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306        YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
corrupted in its object, wrong in its principle, or excessive in its degree, is in its own nature an imitation of the workmanship of God, who " by his Spirit
has garnished the heavens," and covered the earth
with beauty. Who can look over one of creation's
loveliest scenes, and behold the display of elegance
in fbrm, and beauty in color, which in the flowers
of the field and garden, in the plumage of the birds,
in the meandering of the rivers, and the gentle undulations of the earth's surface, exhibiting wood and
copse, hill and d]le- -and all gilded with the beams
of the glorious sun, as they are reflected like the
flashings of the diamond, from sparkling brooks
and streams-I say, who can witness all this without being convinced that God himself delights in
decoration! He has made a world which he has
ornamented so profusely, that he has scattered
beauties where there are no eyes but his own to
behold them:
"Full many a gem of purest ray serene
The dark, unfathom'd caves of ocean bear:
Full many a flow'r is born to blush unseen,
And waste its fragrance on the desert air."
To reject all idea and effort to add the fair to the
good, the beautiful to the useful, would be to oppose
and not to imitate-to condemn and not to approve-the works of the Great Creator. And, indeed, the people are not known even among ChristiAns who do so reject all pretensions to what is
ornamental. Even they who conscientiously xepudiate the pearl, the diamond, and the ruby, the




ORNAMENTS OF FEMALE PROFESSION.    307
feather, and the flower-erect their buildings, select
their furniture, plant their gardens, choose their
garments, according to their ideas of taste, and
with some regard to the laws of beauty.
Hence, I think that both the apostles who touch
on the subject of personal decoration for Christian
women, are to be understood not as condemning
all ornament, but only regulating whatever appertains to this matter. The propensity to personal
decoration is, without all doubt, peculiarly strong in
the female heart. That a maid " should forget her
ornaments, or a bride her attire," is spoken of by
the prophet as a very unlikely thing. There is
nothing wrong in the instinct itself. It serves important purposes. Its total absence isfelt as a serious interruption to the pleasure of social intercourse.
A sloven is disagreeable; a slattern intolerable.
Christianity makes no war with any of man's natural
propensities, but only with their abuse. Its object
is not to eradicate our instincts, but to prune and
train them, and make them bear good fruit. Now,
it is well known that some, in what the apostles say
on this subject, find an absolute prohibition of all
ornaments of dress, and an injunction to wear only
the most plain and unadorned apparel. I think
Christian women may fall into much more dangerous misinterpretations of Scripture than this; yet
I have no doubt it is a misinterpretation. The prohibition seems to be comparative rather than absolute, and contains an injunction to be far more attentive to the ornaments of the soul than to those




308        YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
of the body. " I will have mercy, and not sacrifice,"
means, " I prefer mercy to sacrifice." At the same
time, there can be no doubt that the words of the
text took it for granted that women at all times are,
and that the women of those times were, far too
much addicted to ornamental dress; that they trenched both upon modesty and economy by their habits;
and therefore that in these verses the apostle laid
down some very important hints as to the principles
on which Christian women should regulate their attire. They inculcate modesty in opposition to what
is immodest: economy in opposition to extravagance.
"Excessive costliness," says Archbishop Leighton,
on this passage, "argues and feeds the pride of the
heart, and defrauds, if not others of their dues, yet
the poor of their charity, which in God's sight is a
due debt too; and far more comfort shalt thou have
on thy death-bed, to remember that at such a time,'Instead of putting lace on my own back, I helped
a naked back to clothing; I abated somewhat of
my former superfluities to supply the poor with necessities;' far sweeter will this be than to remember
that,'I could needlessly cast out many pounds to
serve my pride, while I grudged a penny to relieve
the poor."' Barnes has given, I think, the true
meaning of the apostle: "It is not to be supposed
that all use of gold or pearls as articles of dress is
here forbidden; but the idea is, that the Christian
female is not to seek these as the adorning which
she desires, or is not to imitate the world in these
personal decorations. It may be a difficult question




ORNAMENTS OF FEMALE PROFESSION.   309
to settle how much ornament is allowable, and when
the true line is passed. But though this can not be
settled by any exact rules, since much must depend
on age, and on the relative rank in life, and the
means which one may possess; yet there is one
general rule which is applicable to all, and which
might regulate all. It is, that the true line is passed
when more is thought of this external adorning, than
of the ornament of the heart. Any external decoration which occupies the mind more than the virtues
of the heart, and which engrosses the time and attention more, we may be certain is wrong. The apparel should be such as not to attract attention; such
as becomes our situation; such as will not be particularly singular; such as shall leave the impression'that the heart is not fixed on it. It is a poor
ambition to decorate a dying body with gold and
pearls. It should not be forgotten that the body
thus adorned will soon need other habiliments, and
will occupy a position where gold and pearls would
be a mockery. When the heart is right; when
there is true and supreme love for religion, it is usually not difficult to regulate the subject of dress."
It is somewhat remarkable that Plato, the loftiest
of all the Grecian sages, has a passage which strikingly resembles that of the apostle. "Behavior and
not gold is the ornament of a woman. To courtesans, these things, jewels and ornaments, are advantageous to their catching more admirers; but for a
woman who wishes to enjoy the favor of one man,
good behavior is its proper ornament, and not




310        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
dresses. And you should have the blush upon your
countenance, which is the sign of modesty, instead
of paint; and worth and sobriety instead of gold
and emeralds." It is impossible not to notice this
similarity between the apostle and the philosopher;
and equally impossible, one should think, not to
mark the superiority over the reason of the one by
the inspiration of the other. " The philosopher is
of the earth, earthy: the apostle brings the authority of God, and the power of the unseen world distinctly into view. While Plato leads wives to seek
exclusively the honor which comes from men, Peter
teaches them to seek the honor that comes down
from God-the true Judge of excellence, the great
Fountain of honor.
Before we pass from this subject of personal
decoration, we will just notice the very beautiful
reference which the apostle makes to that part of
our nature, which it is to be your chief concern to
beautify: " Let it be," he says, " the hidden man
of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even
the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which in
the sight of God is of great price."  How exquisitely is this put. How impressive the ideas which
are conveyed.  It is the decoration of the soul
rather than of the body, about which Christian
women should be chiefly solicitous: and about the
ornaments that are suitable to its own nature. The
soul is indestructible and immortal-so should its
ornaments be. What can jewels of silver or jewels
of gold do for this? Can the diamond sparkle upon




ORNAMENTS OF FEMALE PROFESSION.  311
the intellect? or the ruby blaze upon the heart? or
the pearl be set in the conscience? or the gorgeous
robe clothe the character? or the feather or the
flower wave over the whole renewed and holy nature? No! The appropriate ornaments of the sou.
are truth, and holiness, knowledge, faith, hope, love,
joy, humility, and all the other gifts and graces of
the spirit-wisdom, prudence, fortitude, and gentle.
ness-these are the jewels with which the inner
man should be adorned. The outer man is corruptible.  Dust it is, and unto dust it shall return.
That beautiful woman, glittering in all the profusion
of diamonds, the admiration and envy of the court
or the ball-room, must, ere long, be a mass of putrefaction too ghastly to be looked upon-a hideous
skeleton-a collection of bones-a heap of dust:
and where then will be the immortal spirit? and
will it wear the cast-off jewels of the body? 0
no! these remain rescued from the grasp of the
king of terrors, only to ornament other bodies, but
not to prepare their souls for immortal glory. But
turn now to that other female-the woman who,
regardless of the decoration of the body, was all
intent upon the beauty of the soul-look at her, I
say, who was clothed with the robe of righteousness
and the garment of salvation, and decorated with
the ornaments of a meek and quiet spirit. She, too,
dies, and whatever of beauty there was in her person dies for a season with her: but the indestructible and immortal spirit over which death hath no
lominion, goes not unadorned into the presence of
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312         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
the Eternal, for the jewels with which it decorated
itself on earth are as indestructible as its own
nature, and go with it to shine in the presence of
God.
"Men," says the good archbishop already quoted,
"think it poor and mean to be meek. Nothing is
more exposed to contempt than the spirit of meekness; it is mere folly with men; but that is no
matter; this overweighs all disesteem-it is with
God of great price. And these are, indeed, as He
values them, and no otherwise. Though it be not
the country's fashion, yet it is the fashion at court;
yea, it is the King's own fashion;'Learn of me,'
says he,'for I am meek and lowly in heart.' Some
that are court-bred will send for the prevailing
fashions there, though they live not at court; and
though the peasants think them strange dresses,
yet they regard not that, but use them as finest and
best. So care you not what the world says: you
are not to stay long with them. Desire to have
both your stuffs and your fashion fiom heaven.
The robe of humility, the garment of meekness,
will be sent you. Wear them for his sake who
sends them to you. He will be pleased to see you
in them, and is not this enough 2 It is never right
in any thing with us till we attain to this —to tread
on the opinion of men, and eye nothing but God's
approbation."*
But we now pass from the ornaments of the
* See Dr. John Brown's masterly exposition of this passage of Peter.
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ORNAMENTS OF FEMALE PROFESSION.    313
Christian woman's person to those of her profession,
and which, indeed, is the chief subject of this sermon.
There is something impressive in the exhortation
contained in another of the passages placed at the
head of this sermon: "Adorn the doctrine of God
our Saviour." Even the great truth of our Divine
Saviour, the Lord Jesus Christ, is thus represented
as susceptible of decoration on the part of those
who profess it. The sentiment conveyed is thisthe holy life of a consistent Christian is an adornment of the profession of this sublime doctrine.
This, more than all splendor of tasteful architecture,
or gorgeous forms, or imposing ceremonies, or any
thing else which can appeal to the senses, is the
decoration of Christian doctrine. It is this, as it
shines forth in the beauties of holiness, that decorates true piety,
"Beyond the pomp that charms the eyes,
Or rites adorned with gold."
A very large proportion of the members of all
Christian churches are females, and young females
too. This, on many accounts, is a very delightful
fact. It has, however, been sometimes complained
of, that like others, they are not so anxious to sustain their profession well, as to make it. And it is
for their sakes, and to lead them to consider what
would set off their profession to the best advantage,
that this sermon is designed. The subject of it
then is this: as what is ornamental is intended to
attract attention, to excite admiration, and to furnish recommendation, it may be inquired, what is
27




314         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
that conduct which will secure all this to the profession of religion? We shall distribute what we
have to advance on this subject into the four following particulars:
First. There is a class of things that are spiritual,
which will have the effect here desired.
And as incongruity of conduct, in reference to
any profession whatever, is a blemish and not a
beauty, a deformity and not a decoration, reiember, that inconsistency would be so in you in reference to religion. Study your profession, and thoroughly understand what it implies and enjoins.
Consider well what sanctity of conduct-what spirituality of mind-what separation fiom the world
in spirit and taste-what devotional feelings-what
faith, hope, love, and humility-what amiableness
of disposition and amenity of temper are included
in the declaration-and that declaration you have
actually made-I AM A CHRISTIAN. You should
not have made such a profession if you did not understand it, nor mean to sustain it. I must remind
you, it is a solemn thing to profess to be a disciple
of Christ. It supposes you to be a new creature,
that old things are passed away and that all things
are become new, that you have new principles,
new motives, new ends of life, new tastes, and
new pleasures. Now, your profession is to be
maintained with a due regard to all this. Your
conduct must comport with it. You must be dissimilar in these things, quite so, to those who make
no profession. They must see the difference as
L._ __~...... -........,. ^   ^..._... _. ~




ORNAMENTS OF FEMALE PROFESSION.    315
well as hear of it. You must commend yourselves
to them as consistent with yourselves. You must
compel them to say, " Well, we do not like her religion, but it is quite in harmony with her profession." But what is this consistency? The following things will perhaps explain it.
Earnestness, without enthusiasm, fanaticism, or
bigotry. Lukewarmness in any thing is odious.
Earnestness, on the other hand, excites attention,
and sometimes admiration, even where the object
is far from commendable; how much more where
the object is holy, benevolent, and useful. It is a
noble and a lofty spectacle to see, amid a race of frivolous mortals, a soul that is immortal, intent upon
its own immortality, and a mind that is surrounded
by the frivolities of this visible world, intent upon
the realities of the unseen state. Nothing can be
more dull and repulsive than a lukewarm and heartless profession of religion-a pale, sickly, and shriveled form, which has all the decay of consumption,
without its hectic flush or lustrous eye. On the other
hand, how impressive a spectacle is it to behold a
young woman, amid the wonderment of some of
her companions and the laughter of others, rising
upon the wing of faith and habitual devotion above
the region of their levities into that of devotionand to see her eye, as it is upturned to heaven,
sparkling with the beam of eternity that has fallen
upon it; to follow her in her ardent career, pursuing her seraphic course, undeterred by contrary ex.
amples or opposing influence. Yet there must be




316         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
no enthusiasm leading her to violate the law of
sobriety-no fanaticism leading her to tie down
others to all the laws she has imposed upon herself,
and to cherish a hostile, much less a malignant feeling toward them, because they seem to differ from
her in some things which she deems important.
There must be the most profound humility blended
with all this intense earnestness, and the mildest forbearance toward others, combined with its own conscientiousness as regards its laws for its own conduct.
Earnestness implies a resolute determination
never to allow others to interfere with its convictions and pursuits; a courage that dares to be singular-a fortitude to brave opposition, united with
a firm gentleness under opposition and persecution.
It includes seriousness without gloomr; for she who
is bent upon eternity, and anxious for salvation,
can not sink down into the levity of those who are
all taken up with fashion, amusement, and folly.
On the other hand, it includes such an intelligent
joy as makes its possessor satisfied with her own
sources of enjoyment, without ever running to the
amusement of the world for pleasure and excitement. The young female professor must let it be
seen and felt that her religion is her bliss and not
her penance-that it is her song and her solace
She must appear as irradiated with sunbeams, and
not invested with shades. Her countenance must
be the index of a heart at peace-a bosom serene
and happy. Earnestness must be indicated, also,
by an intelligent and well-regulated zeal to bring
1_________




ORNAMENTS OF FEMALE PROFESSION.    317
others under that influence which is the spring of
its own energies. Mild in persuasion, gentle in entreaty, and with a loving, insinuating manner, the
female religious professor must aim at the conversion of others.  Usefulness, in the way of holy activity, for the temporal and eternal happiness of
mankind, must be a conspicuous trait of her character. Selfishness, indolence, and inertness are a disfigurement of character, while benevolent activity is
one of its richest ornaments.
And, in addition to all this, earnestness means a
most anxious desire to cultivate that prime virtue in
the composition of womanly and Christian excellence
-MEEKNESS. See how this is commended in the passage we have already quoted from the writings of the
apostle Peter: " The ornament of a meek and quiet
spirit, which in the sight of God is of great price."
God values it above all gifts of intellect, delights
in it above the most splendid genius, honors it
above all that men delight to honor. It is woman's
ornament above all others; it is her defense, for
who can oppress the gentleness that never provokes, and can scarcely resist or complain. Who
can wantonly tread on that lowly, lovely floweret,
which, as it lifts its unpretending head, silently
says: "Can you crush one that hurts none?"
Nothing is more unsightly than the reverse of
this-an irritable, discontented, peevish, domineering woman. Hence the declaration of the inspired
Israelitish sage, " It is better to dwell in the corner
of the housetop alone, than in a wide house with a
j_~~__ ~___   ___ 27*     _




318         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
brawling woman. It is bettel to dwell in the wil
derness, than with a contentious and angry woman.
Whoso hideth her hideth the wind."  Mr. Jay has
drawn a beautiful picture of this virtue in his character of a Christian wife; as one "Who can feel
neglects and unkindnesses, and yet retain her composure; who can calmly remonstrate and meekly
reprove; who can yield and accommodate; who is
not'easily provoked,' and is'easily entreated;'
who would endure rather than complain, and would
rather suffer in secret, than disturb others with her
grief."  Such is meekness, the highest form of the
peculiarly Christian life, and such the ornament of
female Christian profession.
But, secondly, I now touch upon another branch
of the subject, and that is, the importance of social
excellence to the adornment of religion.
Great injustice has been done to religion, and a
great hindrance thrown in the way of its diffusion,
by those descriptions of it which represent it as an
abstract thing, almost exclusively appertaining to
the Sabbath as to time: and to the church as to
place: a mere matter of devotion-a transaction
between God and the soul about salvation and
heaven; but which has nothing or little to do with
secular affairs, the social relations, and the places
of resort in human life. In short, a thing which
looks entirely heavenward, but which casts no
glance upon earth. This, however, is superstition,
and we find enough of it in Popery; which over
lays with a cumbrous ceremonial the moral duties
____________________




ORNAMENTS OF FEMALE PROFESSION.    319
of the law, as well as the free grace of the gospel;
cuts, in many instances, the ties of social life, and
isolates men and women from their fellows; and
by the devotions of the cloister, the convent, and
the church, supersedes the duties of the house, the
shop, and the exchange; thus setting forth religion
as fitting men, as is supposed, for the next world,
but having very little to do with their abode in the
present one. On the contrary, true religion-the
religion of the Bible-has two aspects: with one, it
looks up to heaven; with the other, down to earth.
It gathers all the interests of man under its protection and fostering care. Like the sun which,
though fixed in the heavens, pours the flood of his
light and glory and cherishing influence upon earth;
or like the atmosphere which, though above the
earth, enters into every place upon it, and sustains
the insects that creep, as well as the birds that
soar; so religion irradiates with its light, and guides
by its revelations, and animates with its stimulus,
and sanctifies by its power, and blesses with its influence, all persons, in all their relations, and all.their interests in this present world, who yield
themselves up to its authority and government. It
goes to the palace, and teaches kings their duty;
to the legislature, and teaches senators theirs; to the
exchange, and teaches merchants theirs; and to the
family, and instructs all its members in the various
duties they owe to each other, as well as to God.
Religion is a household thing, a family law; it lifts
the latch of the house, and goes in and takes its
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320         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
seat at the family table, and joins the circle round
the hearth, as well as round the altar; it swells the
joys of the domestic fellowship, as well as responds
to the evening prayer, or chants the morning hymn;
it founds the duties of the second table of the law
upon those of the first, employs the loftiest theology to enforce the commonest morality, and enjoins
the most ordinary obligations of social existence
by motives drawn from the cross of Christ.
Hence, then, the necessity of paying great attention to the various duties of social and domestic life.
We are commanded to let our "light shine before
men, that they seeing our good works nay glorify
God."  So in the beautifil passage quoted from the
apostle Peter, where he gives directions to Christian
wives; he says, "Be in subjection to your own
husbands, that if they obey not the word, they also
may without the word be won by the conversation
of the wives; while they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear." Here again is the fact
set out, that religion is intended to regulate the intercourse, and form the character of domestic and so
cial life, and that where its influence, so exerted, is
seen, it must be beneficial to the observers of it.
We wish to press this most earnestly upon your
attention, that the faith of the gospel is intended
and calculated to carry social excellence to the
very highest perfection. It is the soil in which all
the seeds of domestic happiness will best flourish.
Hence, then, no profession of religion can be ornamented, unless there be a high degree of this.




ORNAMENTS OF FEMALE PROFESSION.   321
It should not be forgotten that this very often
flourishes, even apart from religion. Most exemplary instances of the home duties of life are not
seldom found in those who make no profession of
religion. Good husbands and wives, parents and
children, brothers and sisters, are found on the outside of the circle of vital piety; a fact which ought
to make' those who are within it still more anxious
to be exemplary in the discharge of their obligations. A real Christian should excel the unconvert.
ed person, not only in religion, but in morality.
She should not only be more holy, but more socially excellent. She should excel the worldly in those
things which the latter makes her boast, and rise
above the level which she has prescribed as her
highest elevation in moral and social virtue. Select,
therefore, the most dutiful and affectionate daughter,
the most kind and attentive sister you can, of this
class, and say to yourself, " She makes no profession
of religion, and yet she excels in a manner worthy
of attention and admiration, in all the duties of domestic life. Now, as I do profess religion, I must,
if possible, be still more exemplary than she is in
all social obligations, for surely nothing could possibly bring religion into greater disrepute than for
my parents, or my brothers and sisters, or even the
servants, to make a comparison to my disadvantage,
between my conduct and hers." You probably
have heard of the historic fact of that Roman
daughter, who, when an aged father was in his condemned cell and left to starve, all having been pro.




322         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
hibited from carrying him food, nourished him from
that same breast which sustained her infant. The
authorities were so struck with the report, that the
old man was reprieved, the daughter raised to public esteem, and the prison demolished to make way
for a temple dedicated to FILIAL VIRTUE. If paganism furnished such an example of devoted affection,
and if pagans could so admire it, what ought Christianity to do; not, of course, in the same mode of
action, but in every other in which genuine and
strong affection can show itself.  If you would
adorn your profession, it must be in this way of domestic excellence. There may be the most seraphic
piety, so far as the raptures of devotion go-there
may be a most punctilious performance of all the
rites and ceremonies of religion-there may be a
most eager and regular attendance upon all the public services of religion-there may be a flaming zeal
for the spread of the religious peculiarities of your
denomination; but if at the same time there be a
deficiency of duty, honor, and obedience to your
parents, or of kind interest and affection for your
brothers and sisters, or of humane considerateness
for the servants; all this religious profession will
only excite disgust, and raise a suspicion of your
sincerity, and a prejudice against religion itself.
No one can possibly be attracted to or conciliated
by a religion which is in any great degree destitute
of social and domestic excellence. It is a terrible
taunt to be thrown at any one, -"Yes, she is, if
her own profession and supposition be consulted, a




ORNAMENTS OF FEMALE PROFESSION.    3"3
very good Christian; but it is a pity she is not a
better daughter, a more kind sister, and a more accommodating neighbor." The most flaming profession must be at once thrown into eclipse by such
a sarcasm. If you were to study how most effectually to discredit not only your profession of it,
but religion itself, you could not be more successful
than by associating with it such a line of conduct
as this. I do therefore most solemnly and anxiously entreat you to enter very deeply into the subject of the sermon entitled, " THE YOUNG WOMAN
AT HOME."
It is probable that this sermon will be read by
some who sustain the character of female servants.
This is a class of persons to be found in all our
churches, and in some are very numerous; and I
take this opportunity of saying that I have many
such who are among the brightest ornaments of the
church under my care, and who, by their exemplary
deportment, do much to recommend religion to
their employers. Their honesty, diligence, industry, good temper, and obliging, respectful deportment, make them the comforts of the households in
which they live. It is somewhat observable, that
the text which speaks of our "adorning the doctrine
of God our Saviour," was addressed to servants.
And so far as the ornamental parts of religion are
concerned, as well as its substantial elements, none
have more occasions, or more favorable circumstances for exhibiting them than female servants.
Their humble situation, by testing their good ternr — *. _........ _..    _     _     _    I




324         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
per, devotedness, and submission, gives them an
opportunity of bringing out into bold and beautiful
relief all the morally decorative parts of Christian
piety. On the other hand, there are some who, by
a lamentable deficiency of these more amiable qualities, though, perhaps, they may have real religious
principle, have excited much prejudice against genuine piety, and led their employers to say, "I am
not anxious again to have what are called religious
servants, for in most things they are no better, and
in some they are worse than others."
Thirdly. There are intellectual ornaments of
your profession, which you should seek both on
their own account and on that of religion. True it
is that genuine and consistent religion is its own recommendation, and depends upon nothing extraneous
for its real value. Still, as there are those who
have imbibed prejudices against it, and have taken
up mistaken views of its nature, as if it were at war
with the gifts of the intellect and the graces of the
character, it would be well to disabuse their minds,
and by your attainments, accomplishments, and
your elegance, to convince them that piety is not,
as they may suppose, another name for ignorance,
stupidity, and vulgarity. For their sakes, then, as
well as for your own pleasure, cultivate your minds
by study. Acquire an eager thirst for knowledge.
Be fond of reading, and of the best kind of reading.
Disprove the slander that girls usually are only
fond of tales and novels, of love-stories, and female
adventures or heroism. Love knowledge, desire.... —---  _ —- - - _._  _  _... _




ORNAMENTS OF FEMALE PROFESSION.   325
to arrive at truth, be anxious to investigate the
mysteries of nature; and covet to enrich your
minds with the treasure dug up and distributed in
such abundance in this wonderful age. Store your
minds with this wealth. But let other faculties be
brought into exercise besides your memory; cultivate your judgment; be inquisitive, reflective, discriminating. There are many young persons whose
memory is a store-house crowded with facts, names,
and dates, but who are lamentably deficient after
all in judgment. They may talk French, quote
history, and display other accomplishments, but
their intellect is too feeble to form, to hold, or'to
defend an opinion of their own. We do not, of
course, expect all women to be profound logicians,
or subtle metaphysicians, but most tolerably welleducated females may, by vigorous and well-sustained efforts, arrive at some maturity of sound
judgment. Let it then be seen that the highest of
all wisdom and knowledge does not lead you to
despise the lower kinds; lest those who are adepts
only in the lower kinds, may, by what they see in
you, despise that which is the highest. Make it
clear that they who are the children of God are
most solicitous to become acquainted with a.ll the
works of their Heavenly Father, not excepting the
wonders and glories of creation. Convince the
worshipers of the God of nature, or rather of the
God, Nature —that while you are chiefly anxious to
pass on and worship Him who sits enthroned
between the cherubim, upon the mercy-seat in the
O28




326        YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
Holy of Holies, you can bow and adore with them
in the vestibule of his temple-ascend with them
to the highest altitude of earthly subjects and general knowledge, and when, like birds of weaker
pinions and dimmer vision, they droop the wing
and stop their flight, do you, like the eagle soaring
still upward to the sun, pursue your heaven-bound
course, and rise into the regions of celestial splendor.
Nearly allied to this is taste, or a perception and
love of the beautiful and sublime in nature, in literature, in accomplishments, in conduct, yes, and
in Holy Scripture. The Bible is full of instances
of this. With a correct literary taste, you will
relish more even this bread of life, that came down
from heaven —the Word of God. Inspiration has
garnished its page with beauties that are hidden
from eyes whose vision has not been strengthened
by education. The Scripture is a paradise of flowers to be admired, as well as of fruits that are to
be eaten.
Taste, displayed even in what are called accomplishments, is ornamental to piety, when not carried
to excess. As in a former sermon I observed, even
these elegant trifles are not to be despised. True,
it is a sin for a Christian woman to spend hours and
hours of each precious day in the fashionable modes
of killing time, by embroidery, crotchet, painting,
languages, and music, to the neglect of religion,
useful reading, and all benevolent effort. It is
truly affecting to see a rational, immortal, and ac.
countable creature, dwelling in this world of igno.




ORNAMENTS OF FEMALE PROFESSION.   327
rance, sin, and misery, which she could do some.
thing to enlighten, reform, and bless, and she on
her way to eternity and the bar of God, consuming
so much of the best and preparatory period for her
whole existence in this world and the next, in working figures upon canvas, or drawing them upon
paper, or in playing and singing, or in acquiring
German, French, or Italian. Let me not, however,
be misunderstood. I am not such a rigid utilitarian
as to be the advocate of the merely excellent in
human character, for I really love and admire the
ornamental. I am not all for Doric strength, but
contend also for Ionic grace and Corinthian elegance.
I am not for young women laying down the needle
and the pencil, nor for their leaving the piano silent
and untouched, nor the grammars of foreign languages unlearned. No such thing! Religion forbids not these matters. Nature, and the Bible, too,
are full of the sweetest embroidery and enameling,
full of music and painting, and all the varieties of a
language not our own. Instead of forbidding what
can add embellishment to the female character, I
enjoin it. Woman, formed to please, yea, made in
Paradise, where beauty was in perfection, and
where thy first lessons on taste were taught by the
Great Master of all created beauty-go on to besprinkle thy character, and interweave thy conduct
with every flower of elegance; and especially,
Christian woman, let it be seen by thy sex, that
thou hast not so learned Christ as to throw off that
delight in the picturesque, the tasteful, and the dec



328        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
orative, with which, when HE pointed to the lily,
the vine, the birds, and the flocks, he was pleased
to enliven and adorn his own discourses. To me it
is always a beautiful sight to behold the robe of
righteousness, and the garment of salvation, in
which genuine piety is ever attired, adorned, though
not encumbered, with the jewels of elegant accomplishments and tasteful decoration. Now, all this
is important to you as young, unmarried women;
and how is the importance of it augmented by
looking forward and contemplating yourselves in
future life, as wives and mothers. Without intelligence and taste, are you fitted to be the companion
of a wise and sensible man, or to preside with advantage over the education of children? Remember
the character of the age in which you live. But
even in these days of knowledge and taste, we know
very well that the aptness and ability of a good
housewife are always invaluable; for it is a poor
commendation to say of a woman, " She is exceedingly well informed in all the literature of the day,
quite learned, but she knows very little of household affairs."  I believe her husband often thinks,
if he does not say, " I would dispense with a great
deal of her bookishness and her knowledge, if I
could have the house kept in better condition, and
enjoy a little more comfort at home."  Still, a
a wife and a mother, to all the household pre-requisites, should and may add intelligence and taste.
It is, indeed, the perfection of womanly character,
at once to "look well to the ways of her house



ORNAMENTS OF FEMALE PROFESSION.     329
hold," and also, to " open her nouth with wisdom."
Iow impressive and attractive a scene is it to see
a pious, well-informed, accomplished woman, -espected as well as beloved by her husband, as his
intelligent companion, esteemed by his guests; and
looked up to with confidence, reverence, and affection by her children, over whose general education
she presides with dignity and ability.
Ifolurithly. There are some things which arc not
reducible to either of the other heads, and which
may, therefore, be called gencrc l excellences of a
decorative nature.  These have been already dwelt
upon in former discourses, and therefore need only
be briefly mentioned here. We find them set forth
in the early char1acter and conduct of Rebekah, in
which we beheld modesty without silliness, fiankness without forwardness, courtesy without affectation, and conmpl.isance without servility. In short,
all that maidenly reserve whichwould restrain
whatever is obtrusive, rude, imlpudent, and bold,
anld which yet would allow of an artless, ingenuous,
and unembarrassed mode of intercourse with the
other sex. We have sometimes seen good women
so bold, so obtrusive, so imposing, as to repel and,
disgust.'We could not doubt that there was really
some religious principle at the bottom of all this,
but it was so overlaid with this somewhat indecorous surface that it could scarcely be seen. In some
cases it has happened that even the very profession
of religion, which should have led them to draw
closer the vail of modest reserve, ihas led them to
2G*




330         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
throw it off altogether, and they seenled to act as
if the Christian name, which ought to be a guarantee for all that is neek and  eiitle, is a sanction
for unseemly forwardness. On the contrary, there
are others, whose profession of religion has so anointed theml with the odors of assumed sanctity, so
stiffened them into prudish reserve, and so distorted
the simplicity of nature with tile formalism of a
gloomy superstition, tlhat they are repulsive as
specters, and lead mlany to exclaim, lIf tlhis Ibe
religion, it may be pure, but it is surely unlovely,
and one should imagine as unfit for heaven, where
all is joyous, as it is for earth, where, if happiness
be wanting, this certainly can not supply it."
Good temper, or amiability, is essential to the
adornment of a Christian prol;ssion. This has )een
alludeCd to Calready in more pIlaces tlhn one, but its
importance justifies its repetition. I have nalready
admitted that there is a great diftbrence, in this
respect, in natural constitution. IIenee it costs
some immensely more pains to acquire a small
degree of this excellence, than it does in others to
manifest ten timles the atnount. And really there
may be more of principle and virtue in the modicum
of the one than in the abundance of the other.
Some indulgence should, therefore, be shown to
those who are born with a crabbed disposition, and
they should not always be judged witl too harsh a
severity. We see tile ftlult, but not the contrition
with which it is followed; nor do we witness the
deep self-abasement which the ebullition of the mo- ~  -  -- -— _____________ _ I ___  ____ - -J — ~ J




ORNAME'NTS OF FEMALE PROFESSION.    331
mcnt inflicts for hours, if not (lays. But still we
would enjoin on those who are conscious of this
infirnity, a most anxious, carnest, and prayerful
attention to the sulject.  Let every woman who is
troubled with an overwrought sensibility, a morbid
susceptibility of offensc, an inflxamnmable liability
to passion, put her heart under discipline, or this,
Iher coistitutional tendency, will be a prolific source
of misery to herself, and to othels around her. It
is not, however, as a source of disquietude, that I
no\w allude to it, but as a cause of scandal. A bad
temper not only troubles the heart, but; it disfigures
the profession.  Observers can see nothing to attract, to love, to admire, in that religion which is
associalled with so much ill-ltellper.  There are
soIle ptelrsos whose bad temper is unassociated
with piety, or, indeed, moral worth of any kind-and
they are wasps, hornets, scorpions —all venom, and
no holney-according to the degree of malignity
they possess. Thdre are others, who have real
godliness, and some sterling excellence of othel
kinds, and they resemble tile bees, who, though
they have honey, yet are somewhat irritable, and
have also a sting for those who offend thelm.
Cultivate, then, a lovely and amiable temper, as one
of the brightest ornaments of religion.  It is to
religio(l whNat the burnish is to the gold, the polish
to tlie steel, the fiagrance to the rose, the sunshine
to the prospect.
There is one thing which, in additiol to all that
has been mentioned, is requisite to give the finishing
~_- _._~__~ _. _____-         -     -            - J




332          YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
stroke of ornament to the character of tile young
female professor of religion, and that is-the virtue
that is sometimes designated good sense-at other
timles, prudence-at others, tltougyhtfulnless.  I know
such dispositions are thought, ly some     lillds, to
partake too much of tile grave to be ornamelntal in
youth.   They may hatng like rich, ripe clulsters
rout-nd the character of tile matron, )but such persolls
think the beaulty of youltll consists of tile pictluresque
-the romantic-with a tillge of tlhe wild, the vision-'ary, and tile eltlhusiastic.'lThere is 11o poetry,
they inlagine, ill prudenee-tno imlnlginlatio ll in good
sense-no fincy in thoulghtfulness.  True,.and 1 will
concede so lmuch as to allow, that a precocious
gravity, an anticipation of the antiquated sol)riety
of threescore years and tell, is Iot \whait I elljoin, or
wish to see, in maidell y youltll.  Lveil religion,
with all its solemlin )prolpriti(es,  ll its llheNavelly
sanctities, does lo(t cxtinllgulill tlie viv:acity, the
sprightliness, ald buoyancy of a,gil ill ]her teells.
1 love to see her sparklillg eye, lher sull-lit countenance, her elastic step, alld to hear tle merrt y note
of ler laugllter, and tile Illiusic of her clleerfill
voice.  This is ornalental; it lelongs to 1er age,
and tile nlatural flow of her spirits, and it is otlly
superstition tllat would turn thlat youngm and joy(nus
creature into tlie stiff atd silent statue, the llnun-like
figure, or the unsmlilillg devotee.  Bu3t, tlen, is it
any detrienllt to all tills ilnnocclt hilarity to ha:.ve a
meditative thlouglltfulnless,:ll instillctive sense of
propriety, a cautiols reserve, an accurate discriml




ORNAMENTS OF FEMALE PROFESSION.   333
ination? Is it a blemish rather than a beauty, to
be able to consider what, in all circumstances, is
best to be done, and to be able to do it well-to
act from principle rather than from impulse, and
to be guided by reason rather than by feeling-to
weigh words before they are spoken, and estimate
actions before they are performed?  Is not propriety beauty?  Are fieaks and caprices, whims and
eccentricities, imprudences and follies, ornaments'?
Yes, in the estimation of that silly girl, and in hers
alone, who would rather be smiled at for her wildness and her weakness, than commended for her
more solid excellence. What kind of a mother is
this romantic and wayward creature likely to make?
Let the Christian young woman be very jealous,
then, of this romanticism, and consider it is not in
keeping with the dignity and sanctity of religion.
The matrons are admonished by the apostle to teach
the young women to be sober-a word that relates
not, there, to wine, but to a prudent thoughtfulness.
Such, then, are the ornaments of early female
religious profession. It has been all along through
this discourse supposed that there may be much of
real piety, without some of these accompaniments —
a rough, unpolished godliness, a measure of real, but
unadorned religion. One young female may be very
sincere in her profession, and yet have an unmortifled infirmity of temper; another may be very
illiterate or weak-minded; another may be guilty
of various little inconsistencies, which tarnish the
beauty of her profession; another may be rash,




334        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
restless, and imprudent; another may be spiritually
proud, and something like affectedly sanctimonious;
another may be wanting in agreeable and accommodating home excellences. In all these ways, and
in various others, religion may be disparaged, shorn
of its beauty, rendered less attractive, and made
even repulsive to those who observe it. "' Let not
your good," said the apostle, " be evil spoken of."
Religion is itself so transcendently excellent, being
the highest glory of man, the image of God, and
the temper of Heaven, that it should be exhibited
to the greatest possible advantage.  Who that
wore the portrait of some dear friend, or suspended
a picture of the queen in their house, would not
wish to have a flame or a setting worthy of the
subject? Who would not deprecate the idea of
presenting either of these all covered with dust
and defilement? Religion is the only thing that
can make people happy in this world, or guide
them to eternal felicity in the world to come.
How solemnly, tremblingly anxious should be all
who profess it, to exhibit it in the most advantageous light, and with the greatest and most powerful attractions.  How deeply solicitous should
we be, lest by any thing others see in us, they
should take a prejudice against true godliness, and
we should thus cast stumbling-blocks in their way.
How anxious should we feel, and how studious
should we be, to invest our profession with the
whatsoever things are lovely, that others, beholding
our good works, our peace of mind, our meekness,




ORNAMENTS OF FEMALE PROFESSION.   335
gentleness, and kindness, our usefulness and humility, should be won to Christ; that so, if they will
not love religion, in the first instance, for its own
sake, they may be conciliated to it by the ornaments with which, in our case, it is decorated.
Before this sermon is concluded, I may, with
great propriety, suppose that some will read it who
have made no profession of religion, who are in
visible connection with no Christian church, and
are living in the habitual neglect of the Lord's Supper. Making no profession of religion! How is
this? Have you none to profess?   Melancholy
idea! No religion! Better, I admit, not to profess at all, than to profess what you do not possess,
and thus add hypocrisy to other sins. But is it
not painful and fearful to think of a rational,
immortal, sinful being living without penitence,
prayer, faith, and love? How can you live another hour without it, in such a state? What are
all the intellectual ornaments spoken of above,
without personal piety, but a garland of beautiful
flowers around the brow of a corpse; or but as
diamonds sparkling on the breast of death? Oh,
for your soul's sake, live no longer without remem
bering your Creator in the days of your youth.
Others, perhaps, will read this discourse, who,
though partakers of true faith in Christ, and love to
God, are not yet professors of the religion they
possess. We again say, how is this? Have you
pondered that language of the apostle: " With the
heart man believeth unto righteousness, and with




836         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
the mouth confession is made unto salvation"Rom. x. 10. And that solemn injunction of Christ,
when he instituted the sacred supper: " Do this in
remembrance of me." Is this the command you
except from the law of the New Testament as the
only one you feel at liberty to disobey? This one
-so tender, so pathetic, so loving! This-delivered in sight of the cross, and only a few hours before our Lord endured those agonies by which you
are saved! What! neglect the command of dying
love! A command so positive, an invitation so
gracious, an injunction, obedience to which is at
once so honorable, so happy, and so useful. What
is your reason for this neglect? Do you tremble
to make a profession because it is so awful? Does
not this arise from superstitious rather than religious
dread?  Awful! to profess the faith you exercise,
anal to commemorate the death of Christ? Have
you not mistaken the design of the Lord's Supper
as simply a commemorative ordinance, and are you
not contemplating it as enveloped with the mystery
in which sacerdotal assumption has wrapped it up?
But, "you tremble to make a profession; lest you
should dishonor it, as so many have done." They
have, indeed, and the painful fact should lead to
caution, self-examination, and earnest prayer for
grace, that another stumbling-block should not be
furnished by you. But the very fear, will, if sincere, be your preservation from the object of your
dread. The path of duty is the way of safety.
Besides, are you less likely to sin without the pale




ORNAMENTS OF FEMALE PROFESSION.   337
of communion, than within it?  We invite you,
therefore, if you are partakers of true faith, to profess, or to use a Scriptural synonym, to confess it.
The communion of saints, and the participation of
the Lord's Supper will strengthen by God's grace
the principle, and call forth the exercise of the Divine life, and be at once your honor and your joy.
And, as to you who are already to be found in the
fellowship of the faithful, we congratulate you on
the choice you have made, and on the decision to
which you have come. To your pastors it is a
source of unspeakable pleasure to receive you
among the number of the followers of the Lamb.
You, in an especial manner, are our hope, and joy,
and crown of rejoicing, inasmuch as we look to you,
and those who may descend from you, to fill up the
places of the more aged disciples, when they, according to the course of nature, shall be removed to
the church triumphant. Acknowledge practically
and gratefully the grace you have received from the
Lord, by using your influence with labor and judgment, to engage other young persons, your relatives, and companions, to come and share with you
the privileges, and enjoy the blessings of Christian
communion. And to give effect to your persuasions, exhibit all the beauty of consistent example.
Let religion be seen in you, combining with all its
sanctities and spiritualities, that amenity of life,
that amiability of temper, general intelligence, correct taste, and social excellence, which shall prepossess them in favor of genuine piety. Make it
29




338        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
evident to them, that true godliness is as happy a
thing as it is a holy one. Convince them by what
they see in you, as well as by what they hear from
you, that you have found the secret of bliss-that
your soul has touched the center. Let the richest
excellences, all that can adorn the female character,
all the most rare and delicate beauties that are admired, be strung together upon the golden thread
of eminent piety, and be hung like a necklace
of heavenly pearls round your profession. Thus
"ADORN THE DOCTRINE OF GOD YOUR SAVIOUR IN
ALL THINGS."
I____________




(jw  biotnr   Aiu  64iranrter Uf  alnrtya aRn
3tVat  nf   orttlauq.'Now it came to pass, as they went, that he entered
into a certain village: and a certain woman named'Martha received him into her house. And she had a
sister called Mary, which also sat at Jesus' feet, and
heard his word. But Martha was cumbered about
much serving, and came to him, and said, Lord, dost
thou not care that my sister hath left me to serve
alone? bid her therefore that she help me. And
Jesus answered and said unto her, Martha, Martha,
thou art careful and troubled about many things; but
one thing is needful; and Mary hath chosen that good
part, which shall not be taken away from her"-Lvux
x. 38-42
THIs beautiful little gem of sacred history is replete with instruction in reference to every one of
the individuals which it brings before us. It is a
group of characters, each possessing its own peculiar excellence and interest. How much does it
say for the condescension, kindness, and fidelity of
the chief personage of the scene  and not less for
the feelings and the excellences of the other two.
In the person and conduct of Jesus Christ are
always comboied, without being confounded, all
the uncreated glories of the godhead, and all the




340         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
milder beauties of the perfect man; and if, in the
admiration of his humanity, we are not to lose sight
of his divinity, so neither in the contemplation of
his divinity are we to forget his hunanity. Human
nature had its consummation in him-he is its representative in its best estate-the pattern man.
His greatness did not raise him above any branch
or manifestation of goodness. Is friendship one of
the virtues of our nature-one of the bonds of
society-one of the blessings of life-a sweet and
lovely flower that unfolds its beauty and exhales its
fragrance in the garden of our social existence 
Behold in Jesus Christ this virtue in perfection!
He had his attachments, not indeed capricious ones;
they were all founded on adequate reasons for their
selection and exercise; but he had them. His
nature was susceptible of special regards. He felt
more complacency in some persons than he did in
others, whom still he loved. He does so now.
Hence the groundlessness of the cavil against
Christianity that it nowhere positively enjoins the
practice of friendship; for it does more-it exhibits
it in the character and conduct of its Divine
Founder. For "Jesus loved Martha, and her sister, and Lazarus;" and this was so well known,
that when Lazarus was ill, " his sisters sent unto
Christ, saying, Lcrd, behold he whom thou lovest is
sick." And where shall we find a more beautiful
manifestation of friendship than is described in the
gospel narrative of Christ's conduct 7lhen Lazarus
was dead?




CHARACTER OF MARTHA AND MARY.      341
In entering upon this interesting history, 1 may
observe, that it is one of the peculiarities of our
Saviour's discourses that he often takes occasion to
graft general truths on special incidents-makes
comparatively small occurrences the vehicle of momentous instructions, and in a few words says all
that is necessary to bring everlasting truth, in some
important view of it, home to all times and circumstances. Standing on the spiritual central-point, he,
without violence, entwined the minutest and least
important circumstances of the present with the
loftiest eternal verities. Thus in the conduct of
the two sisters before us, he places together the
nothingness of all love and care for the body, in
comparison with care for the soul and solicitude
about that which is everlasting.
Bethany was a little village about two miles from
Jerusalem, inhabited as a suburban retreat by
many wealthy and respectable Jews. There dwelt
Martha, who appears to have been the elder sister,
and mistress of the house, her sister Mary, and a
brother, named Lazarus. Whether the sisters were
maidens or widows, we are not informed. All we
we know of the family is —and it is the best and
most worthy thing to be known of them-that they
were all united, not only by the ties of nature, but
of grace-they were all one in Christ, partakers
of "the common salvation," by a "like precious
faith."
In the bosom of this little quiet and holy family
it is probable Jesus occasionally found repose after
29*




342         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
the bodily fatigues and mental sufferings of the unbelieving city; for his humanity was susceptible
of both these, indeed, of all the sinless infirmities
of our nature, and even of the relief afforded by
rest and pious converse. "0 happy house," says
the pious Bishop Hall, "into which the Son of God
vouchsafed to set his foot! 0 blessed women, that
had grace to be the hostesses to the Lord of heaven
and earth! How should I envy your felicity herein,
if I did not see the same favor, though in a different
way, if I be not wanting to myself, lying open to
me."  There are two ways of receiving Christ-in
himself, by opening the door of our hearts by faith;
and in his members, by opening our hands by
charity, and our doors by hospitality. And Christ
will esteem himself better served in these ways,
than he would, were he again upon earth, by being
entertained in our houses.
On one occasion, when the divine visitant made
his'appearance by an unexpected advent, Martha,
as the head of the household, the presiding spirit of
the domestic economy, with an anxiety prompted
by a loving and generous heart toward her illustrious guest, not altogether, perhaps, unmixed with
a desire to display her skill in good housewifery,
set about providing the best and fullest entertainment the larder could afford. We can see her in
the fullness of her cares and the activity of her temper, cheerfully and busily engaged in getting ready
the supper. Eyeing every thing with minute inspection and provident forethought, that nothing
_____________       ____________________j




CHARACTER OF MARTHA AND MARY.     343
might be wanting that was worthy either of her
Lord or of herself. Generous but mistaken woman,
dost thou know so little of thy Lord as to imagine
he needs or can be gratified with all this culinary
care and carnal provision   Hadst thou never
heard what he once said to his disciples when
pressed to take food? "My meat and my drink
are to do the will of my Father in heaven."  Yet
it was love, though mistaken love. I can fancy her
saying to herself, "Can I ever do enough for him
who deserves infinitely more than all I can do?
Cheerfully will I give him the best I have, and the
most I am able to perform. To give to Jesus and
labor for him are my delight. He has my heart and
he shall have my hand, my feet, my house, my all."
And where all this while was Mary? Eagerly
availing herself of the precious opportunity afforded
by the presence of the Great Teacher, sitting at his
feet to receive instruction. Such a season, might
never return; and she was determined to make the
best of it by listening to every word the Saviour
said. Yet we are not to suppose that Martha had
not been at the Master's feet at all, listening to any
part of Christ's instructions, for it is said of Mary
that "she also sat at Jesus' feet, and heard his
word," evidently implying that some other had been
there also, which no doubt was Martha; who, just
then, like some of her sex, thinking of the house and
its duties while in the sanctuary and service of
God, recollected the supposed necessary provision
to be made, and somewhat abruptly rose up and




341        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
retired from the presence of Christ to the scene of
her domestic solicitude, leaving Mary to be feasted
by Christ, while she goes to make a feast for him.
"I know not," says the good bishop already quoted,
"how to censure the holy women for an excess of
care to welcome her Saviour."
How apt are we to measure other people's sense
of propriety, and rightness of conduct, by our own,
and to blame them for not exercising their religion
and expressing their love and obedience to Christ
in our mode. Mary, perhaps, wondered that Martha could on any ground whatever cease to listen
to the instruction of Christ, while Martha wondered
no less that Mary could sit still and be a learner
when she ought to have been active as a provider.
Martha would be ready to blame Mary for her
want of love in keeping Christ talking when she
should have been caring for his refreshment; while
Mary would be apt to blame Martha for the lukewarmness of her regard, in not eagerly catching
every word that fell from his lips. Let us learn
that all may equally love Christ, who do not take
exactly the same mode of showing it. Goodness
has great latitude, and is very ingenious in its
modes. It is uniform in essentials, but multiform
in circumstantials.
After waiting some time, and expecting Mary to
come out and assist her, and after often, perhaps,
casting a silent but reproachful look at Mary, as
the door stood ajar, and she saw her still sitting at
the feet of Jesus, Martha's patience could endure




CHARACTER OF MARTHA AND MARY.     345
it no longer, and in unseemly haste, and ruffled
temper, and irreverent manner, she entered the
room, and thus addressed herself to Christ: " Lord,
carest thou not that my sister hath left me to serve
alone? Bid her that she come and help me."
It was a sad speech, which, in her cooler moments,
she must have condemned. It was irreverent to
Christ, for it accused him in angry tone of neglect
of her comfort. It was unkind to her sister, for it
implied that she was wanting both in love-to Christ
and to herself. It was well she had one to deal
with who knoweth our frame, and remembereth we
are but dust. Why did she appeal first to Christ,
and arraign her sister at his bar? Might she not
have beckoned her away, or whispered in her ear?
Or why, when she saw her so devoutly engaged,
did she not leave her to her rapt enjoyment, and
say: " Happy sister, to be thus enjoying thy Lord's
presence and instructions; would I could feel at liberty from these cares, and be at thy side; but
somebody must provide for the comfort of the
Master, and this belongs to me." Those are not
always in the right who are most forward in their
appeals to God. Many are more anxious to get
God on their side, than to be on the side of God;
and we must therefore take heed lest we expect
Christ to espouse our unjust and groundless quarrels. I am afraid there was in Martha's mind at
this time a little of that envy and ill-will which is
not unfiequently felt by one person at witnessing
the superior piety of another. The more eminent
________________________________________  ]~~~~~~~~~~~




346        YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
religion of one professor is often felt to be a re.
proach to those who are lukewarm and worldly,
and is therefore really in some cases the cause of
ill-will and dislike.
We do not find that Mary uttered a syllable in
reply to this vehement accusation. I can fancy her
lifting up her meek and invoking eye to the Saviour,
with a look which seemed to say, " Oh, my Lord, I
leave the vindication of my love to thee, and to my
sister, in thine hands." Gentle spirit! may we
learn of thee when we are complained of for welldoing, to seal up our lips in silence, and to expect
our righting from above. And how surely will
Jesus undertake our cause, and bring forth our
righteousness as the light, and our judgment as the
noonday.   Christ, when he might have retorted
with a keen and cutting severity, replied only with
a kind but faithful answer, in which he first rebuked
her, and then justified and commended her sister.
The very repetition of her name is instructive, as
showing how much in earnest, and how serious
Christ was in this act of reproof: "Martha, Martha;" as if he had said, " Oh. woman, thou art very
wrong." Though the wrong-doing was out of love
to him, he reproved it; for, as many as he loves,
he rebukes and chastens. No faults, mistakes, or
sins, are more dangerous than those which originate
in misdirected love; and none should be more faithfully, yet tenderly pointed out to those who commit them, as there are none which the deceitfulness
of the human heart wiii be so backward to see and




CHARACTER OF MARTHA AND MARY.         347
confess, none which it will be more ready to excuse
and defend.   The ill-directed love of friends is
sometimes more mischievous to others than the
open hostility of foes.  Now observe the rebuke
of Jesus.   "Thou art careful and troubled about
many things-but one thing is needful. Thy mind
is full of unnecessary anxiety about those domestic
matters, and hurried about by a restless agitation.
And what thou discoverest on the present occasion,
is too much thy wont on others.     There is one
thing far more important, and far more needful,
than all these matters, which, by losing the opportunity I now afford thee of receiving instruction,
thou art sadly neglecting. I. mean the care and
salvation of thy immortal soul."*
* It has been contended by some, that by the one thing
needful, our Lord intended to suggest to Martha, that instead of the abundance she was preparing, the many varieties of food she was about to place upon the table, one dish
only was necessary, I will not deny that this might seem
to harmonize with the occasion; much less will I deny that
it would furnish on the part of our Lord a perpetual, and
merited, and justly called-for rebuke to that unnecessary
and sinful care, trouble, and expense on the part of professing Christians, to provide costly entertainments for
their friends. Good John Newton has some admirable remarks on the subject of entertainments given to ministers.
" Some of us would be better pleased, whatever kindness
our friends design to show us, to be treated less sumptuously, and in a way more conformable to the simplicity of
our Christian profession. We would not wish to be considered as avowed epicures, who can not dine well without
a variety of delicacies; and if we could suppose that such
cost and variety were designed to remind us how much




348          YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
Having rebuked Martha, our Lord next vind;
cates her sister, whom she had so severely and unmeritedly reproached.   " Mary hath chosen that
good part which can not be taken from her."  By the
good part, we are to understand her sitting at
Christ's feet to hear his words, rather than bustling
about in domestic matters. That was the good
part for the moment, but I believe our Lord meant
to extend his meaning in what he said to each of
the sisters, to their habitual character and conduct,
and as he intended, when he said to Martha, she
was too careful and too much troubled about many
things, to describe her usual temperament, so when
he said that Mary had chosen the good part, he designed to describe her uniform attention to the high
and sacred concern of religion, and to represent her,as one who had given herself to the pursuit of eternal salvation.  This was matter of choice, and
neither of compulsion nor of unintelligent and
heartless formality. She voluntarily took up a life
of piety; and in doing this, had secured an inheritance, incorruptible, undefiled, and that fadeth not
better we fare abroad than at home, we might think it
rather an insult than a compliment." The criticism, however, which would make our Lord refer to such things, is
obviously a false one; for as Mary's conduct is opposed to
that of Martha's, that which she chose, the good part, must
be the same as the one thing needful; and if the one thing
needful means one dish, Mary's good part must also be one
dish, which she chose, or provided, rather than the many
which her sister was intent upon. But this is trifling with
Scripture, rather than explaining it.




CHARACTER OF MARTHA AND MARY.      349
away. We reserve, for the conclusion of the sermon, some remarks on this description of true
piety. How difficult is it to inflict reproof, and not
excite anger, and bestow deserved praise without
doing mischief by inflating vanity. No such injury
was done in this case. The effect, however, both
of the censure and of the praise, we have reason to
hope, though it is not recorded, was beneficial; for,
in a subsequent chapter of this scriptural history,
to which we shall presently have occasion to refer,
we find the two sisters equally conjoined in affection, and Martha herself considerably improved.
I shall now attempt an analysis and discriminating delineation of the character of these two
sisters. I have already remarked that they were
in one, and that the most important feature, alike
-they were both pious women-they both loved
Christ. And what is religion without love to the
Saviour? In making the inquiry after true piety,
fix your attention, concentrate your thoughts, terminate your researches, settle your conclusions, on
this simple, but comprehensive idea-it is a scriptural, supreme, practical, grateful, love to Christ. This
Martha, as we have already asserted, undoubtedly
possessed, as well as Mary. She, too, notwithstanding her failings, could have returned the same answer
as did Peter, " Lord, thou knowest all things; thou
knowest that I love thee." Underneath the too great
superficial earthliness of that careful and troubled
mind, there burned a sacred fire of strong attachment
to the Saviour. With this sameness of general char
30




350         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
acter, there were circumstantial differences. Just
as we have seen two flowers springing from the
same root, possessing the same general characteristics, yet one bending more toward the earth than
the other, which stands erect, and opens its petals
more expansively to the sun. Martha and Mary
are the exemplars of the peculiarities of two distinct
varieties of character and religious tendencies. One,
the type of a naturally energetic, the other, of a
quiescent mind.  One exhibiting excellence in
acting, the other in repose.  One, a life busily
devoted to externals, such as is frequently seen in
this passing world; the other of calm self-devotion
to the divine, as the one thing needful. In the one
we see the contemplative, musing and feeding in
silence upon holy thoughts, and looking up in rapt
meditation into heaven; in the other we see the
practical, now lavishing her indefatigable cares upon
a brother whom she loves, and now ministering in
ordinary life to a Saviour whom she adores; invoking him in the bitterness of grief, and blessing
him in the joy of deliverance. In one, too much of
the busy, careful, anxious housewife; in the other,
perhaps, too much of the contemplative, quiescent
devotee. You can not mistake all this; it is patent
to every reader. There was much that was good
and useful in Martha's character. She possessed
great quickness, alertness, and energy, together with
a certain practical ability and good sense, qualifying
her both for taking a lead herself, and for giving an
impulse to others; so that she was well fitted for




CHARACTER OF MARTHA AND MARY.     351
going through with any work to be done, and
always awake to the common calls and the corn
mon cares of the ordinary domestic routine of life.
And more than this, she was eminently qualified to
work her way, and to help others to do the same,
through those emergencies of trouble and of difficulty which not unfrequently occur in the changeful
scene of human existence. It is a blessed temperament, my young friends, to have that noble hardihood, and untiring energy, and undaunted boldness
of character, which can grapple with difficulty, surmount obstacles, and, instead of being crushed by
misfortune, can rise triumphantly above it.
But, then, such a temperament has its dangers,
and Martha fell into them. She was impetuous,
irritable, intolerant, and somewhat rude. She was
angry that others were not as energetic as herself, a
common fault with persons of such a turn of mind.
She could not Imake allowance for their difference
of disposition.  She was, however, an excellent
woman after all.  "Mary was characterized by
more depth of thought, more reflection, more sensibility. She was more easily engrossed by an
affecting scene, or any spiritual subject; more alive,
at any time, to one single profound impression, and
apt to be abstracted from other concerns."
We see the characteristics of these two sisters
brought out in an affecting scene in their after-history, to which I will now advert, and for the particulars of which I refer you to the eleventh and
twelfth chapters of the gospel by John. Sickness




352         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
in an alarming form entered this little family at
Bethany, and arrested Lazarus. Jesus was at that
time in Bethabara, about thirty miles from Bethany.
In the agony of their grief, the sisters dispatched a
messenger to Christ, under supposition that he
would come and restore their brother to health.
Lazarus, it should seem, expired soon after the messenger left. On receiving the information, Christ,
who knew all about the matter, and who knew also
what he would do, lingered upon the spot two
whole days, in order that the miracle he was about
to work might, from the circumstances of a longer
continuance of death, be the more signal and convincing. At length he set out for Bethany. Observe in this act his usual mercy, to travel on foot
thirty miles, to restore a dead man. How delightful is it thus to trace the Saviour in his journeys,
justifying the description which is given of him, as
one " who ever went about doing good."  Martha
was the first to receive information of his approach
on this occasion to Bethany, either because, as the
mistress of the house, the intelligence was first conveyed to her, or because, from her bustling and
active disposition, she was most likely to hear of it.
And now, in character with herself, she lost not a
moment, but immediately hastened forth to meet
her Lord, to render him the offices of courtesy and
respect, to inform him of the calamity that had befallen them, to pour out to him the sorrows of her
heart, and to receive the expressions of his sympathy. She is now, as ever, ready to be up and
I-________




CHARACTER OF MARTHA AND MARY.      353
doing. But Mary, either not being informed of the
coming of Jesus, or absorbed in a deeper grief, sat
still in the house, and waited for the entrance of the
Comforter. This intensity of sorrow did not escape
the notice of the Jews; hence, when at length she
arose at the call of her sister to go forth and meet
her Lord, they said, " She goeth unto. the grave to
weep there." They said this from a knowledge of
her character, for they made no such remark on
Martha when she went forth. She might be bent
on other errands. Mary could go-only to weep.
It is well observed by Dr. Candlish, in his discourse on this subject: "In different circumstances
the same natural temperament may be either an
advantage or a snare. Martha was never so much
occupied in the emotion of one subject or scene, as
not to be on the alert and ready for the call to
another. This was a disadvantage to her when she
was so hurried that she could not withdraw herself,to wait upon the Word of Life. It is an advantage
to her now, that she can, with comparative ease,
shake off her depression, and hasten of her own accord to meet her Lord. The same profound feeling, again, which made Mary the most attentive
listener before, makes her the most helpless sufferer
now; and disposes her almost to nurse her grief,
until Jesus, her best comforter, sends specially and
emphatically to rouse her. Nor is it an insignifi.
cant circumstance, that it is the ever-active Martha
who carries to her more downcast sister the awakening message; so ought sisters in Christ to minis30*




354         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
ter to one another, and so may the very difference
of their characters make them mutually the more
helpful." "She went her way, and called Mary
her sister secretly, saying, The Master is come and
calleth for thee."*
The two sisters, now deeply affected with a sense
of their loss, meet their Lord, and exhibit, in their
interview, the same difference of character as pervades their whole history. Martha's grief is not
so overwhelming as to prevent her utterance; she
is calm, cool, and collected enough to enter into
argument. She can talk of her sorrow, can refer
to her loss, can express her faith, and even modestly
suggest to Christ, in a delicate and covert petition,
the possibility of his restoring her brother. It was
different with Mary. In piety, of course, she is
equal to her sister, but in composure and serenity
she is inferior. Her gentle spirit is paralyzed
with grief. All she can do is to cast herself prostrate at the feet of Christ; all she can say, is to
sob out, "Lord, if thou    hadst been here my
brother had not died." We can not pass over one
more characteristic, exquisitely delicate, and true
to nature. Jesus, having asked where Lazarus had
been laid, is conducted to the grave, which was a
cave with a stone upon it, and he gives orders to
take away the stone. It was not Mary who offered
the objection founded on the commencement of pu
trefaction; she is silent still in the unutterable
* " Scripture Characters," by Dr. Candlish. An exceedingly interesting and instructive volume.




CHARACTER OF MARTHA AND MARY.     355
agony of her grief, and the deep reverence of her
soul before the Lord. But Martha's marked officiousness makes her forward, when it might have
been more becoming to be dumb, and to stand in
awe. Dr. Candlish, with nice and just discrimination, points out the wise and considerate manner,
which will be observed by every judicious critical
reader of the narrative, in which Christ adapts his
behavior toward the two sisters. Martha's distress
was of such a nature that it admitted of discussion
and discourse.  Jesus accordingly spoke to her,
and led her to speak to him, and made to her, as
suited her circumstances, some of his sublimest
communications touching the resurrection of the
body, and the life of the soul. While to Mary,
who is rapt in such deep grief, he shows his sympathy in a different way. He is much more profoundly moved. He does not reply to her in
words, for her words are few. Sorrow has choked
her utterance, and overmastered her soul. But the
sight of one so dear to him, lying in such helpless
grief at his feet, is an appeal to him far stronger
than any supplication.  And his own responsive
sigh is an answer more comforting than any promise. " When Jesus, therefore, saw her weeping, and
the Jews also weeping who came with her, he
groaned in spirit, and was troubled." And when
he had asked of the bystanders where they had
laid him, and received the reply, " Come and see,"
-like Joseph, "he could no longer refrain him.
self,"-" Jesus wept."
_________________~                     ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~i




356         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
" Oh, most blessed mourner, with whose tears
thy Saviour mingles his own! Oh, sympathy most
unparalleled! To each of the two stricken and
afflicted ones our Lord addressed the very consolation that was most congenial. With Martha, Jesus discoursed and reasoned: with Mary,'Jesus
wept.'" It is thus He who knoweth our frame
adapts the communications of his grace, as our
temperament and circumstances most need them.
Before we quit this scene of domestic grief, and
pass to another incident in the history of Martha
and Mary, shall we not turn aside to see this great
sight exhibited in the conduct of Jesus? I know
I am giving the history of Martha and Mary, but
was not Christ so blended with it as to form a part
of it, and to constitute the glory of it? Shall I
take you to the grave of Lazarus, point you to the
mourning sisters, and omit to notice the weeping
Saviour? Shall I pass over that short but wondrous verse, which tells us with such sublime sim.
plicity, JESUS WEPT? every view of Christ is glorious, whether reigning upon his throne in the glory
he had with the Father before the world was; or
agonizing in the garden, when he sweat, as it were,
great drops of blood; or hanging upon the cross, a
great and terrible sacrifice for sin; or rising from
the grave with the keys of death and of hell at his
girdle; or ascending to his glory amid the retinue
and acclamations of angels. Now all these manifestations produce feelings of awe and wonder.
But, oh, his weeping at the grave of Lazarus! The




CHARACTER OF MARTHA AND MARY.     357
Son of God in tears-not as on the Mount of Olivet, when he signed the death-warrant of Jerusalem, and looked onward from the destruction of the
guilty city, to the torments of eternity of which its
fires and plagues were a dark type-no, his tears
on this occasion were those of human tenderness,
the exquisite sympathies of his noble and perfect
manhood with the afflictions of those whom he
loved. How many lessons are taught us by those
tears. Have they not vindicated and defended hu
inanity from the insults and injuries of stoicism,
and made chastened sorrow one of its genuine
workings? Have they not consecrated sympathy
as one of the virtues of humanity? Have they not
made tenderness the adornment of greatness? Have
they not raised friendship to the rank of a Christian
excellence? Have they not proved that he has not
the mind of Christ who knows not how to weep for
the woes of our nature? Do they not prove that
if tears are woman's eloquence, they are man's
rhetoric also?
Jesus wept. There were critics, in ancient, times,
who, with ruthless fingers, cancelled this verse, as
thinking it beneath the dignity of Jesus to weep.
Barbarian critics, stoical scholars, ye would have
robbed the Scriptures of one of their brightest
gems, and despoiled the character of the Saviour
of one of its richest beauties.
But now after this, not I hope ungraceful episode,
let us pass on to one more scene in the history of
this happy, holy family. About four months after




358         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
the resurrection of Lazarus, a supper was given to
our Lord and his disciples; most likely on account
of the resurrection of Lazarus, who with his sisters
were, perhaps, relations of the host, by a man
named Simon, who had been a leper, and had in all
probability been healed by Christ. At this supper
Lazarus, and Martha, and Mary, were present.
Here also we find the separate identity of the character of the two sisters maintained with unbroken
continuity and unvarying uniformity. Martha, ever
active, ever generously attentive to the comforts
of others, ever to be found where energy is required,
" served." She had assisted in the preparation, and
now busies herself in waiting upon the guests, and
especially upon the most distinguished of them all,
her Lord and Master, whom she loved. Not so
with Mary; in that assembly all were forgotten
by her but one, on whom she gazed long, with the
silent rapture of love and devotion, waiting and
watching for her opportunity to give him her meditated, practical, and personal expression of adoring
gratitude and affection. While he was reclining at
table on his couch, according to the custom of the
times, instead of sitting upright, as we do, in chairs,
she stole behind him, and, unrestrained by the
presence of the guests, brought out her alabaster
box of spikenard, with which she anointed the feet
of Jesus, and wiped his feet with her hair. She
gave him the most costly article of her toilet, and
employed for him the most ornamental part of her
person. For who that loves Christ will not give




CHARACTER OF MARTHA AND MARY.     359
him the richest and best of their possessions'?
Was not this Mary all over! Sensibility, gratitude, affection. Does it not harmonize with the
listener and mourner whom we have already witnessed? From one of the company-I mean the
traitor who sold his Master for thirty pieces of sil
ver-this act of pious affection and liberality drew
forth a censure; and, under a hypocritical profession
of concern for the poor, he expressed his regret that
the precious ointment had not been sold and given
to the stock of charity. Ah, how often has a plea
of charity served as a cloak for covetousness! True
it is, as a general principle, that great expense in
external magnificence, even when designed to honor
Christ, would most commonly be better employed
in feeding and clothing his members; but there
are some extraordinary occasions when a sort of
profuseness can not be blamed. And every thing
which is given to Christ is acceptable to him when,
as in this case, it is love that gives. And happy is
the person who knows, like Mary, to make that an
offering and expression of love to the Saviour, which,
in the days of worldliness and folly, was offered at
the shrine of vanity. Jesus becomes her vindicator against the cavils of Judas, and pronounced
an eulogium which the loftiest monarch on earth
might covet to receive. "She hath done what she
could." Of how few can this be said; and yet
what lower rule of conduct ought any of us to prescribe for himself than this. Is less than what we
can do for Christ, enough to do for him? Have




360         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
you ever weighed in seriousness of mind this noble
testimony, "SHE HATH DONE WHAT SHE COULD."
What can you do for Christ? What have you
done? What ought you to do? What will you
do? Be Mary's Memorial yours. And to what
renown did it raise her? "Wherever this gospel
shall be preached throughout the whole world, this
also that she hath done shall be spoken of for a
memorial of her."  How literally has this been
fulfilled. Wherever the Bible has gone, this-in
one hundred and fifty languages-has been published
to the world. All nations, and persons of all nations, shall know of Mary's alabaster box of ointment consecrated to Jesus, and shall venerate her
memory for this act of pious zeal. The world is a
poor judge in matters relating to God; and God
takes delight in honoring those actions which the
world blames, through a spirit different from his.
Happy are those who are content with the approbation of him who sees the heart. The contradictions and groundless censures of men pass away
like the clouds that occasionally vail the sun; but
the good actions which are the subject of their envy
or their calumny, will, like the great luminary, remain forever. Good works invest the name with
enduring renown, and embalm the memory with an
odor more precious and lasting than the perfume of
Mary's spikenard.
Reference has been made to this incident, and
especially to the praise bestowed by our Lord upon
Mary, to prove that the contemplative life is more
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ ___  _ _ _ __ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  __ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _




CHARACTER OF MARTHA AND MARY.     361
acceptable in the sight of God than the active. It
is this mistaken notion which has led to the establishment of conventual institutions by Romanism;
a system which is no less opposed to the dictates
of revelation than it is to the impulses of nature
and the welfare of society; which does violence to
humanity in order to do honor to Christianity;
stifles all the instinctive yearnings of the heart, to
give better opportunity for the exercise of devotion;
and which, as a natural and necessary consequence,
has deposited a muddy soil of immorality upon the
surface of Christendom, where the fruits of righteousness can not grow, though the weeds of superstition
may flourish with a rank luxuriance. The supposition that a superior sanctity attaches to celibacy is
one of the supports on which the whole Papal system rests, and has been the cause of more abomination in the world than any other single opinion
claiming to have a religious sanction. That the
history before us will furnish no support to this
system, is evident.  Mary, neither at the time
spoken of was a nun, nor did she ever become such.
Hers was a piety that blended with, and sanctified
the duties of social life. Whatever was her devotional taste and disposition, it did not drive her
from her home, nor cut the tie of her relationships.
The design of our Lord's language is not so much
to form comparison between two courses of life, so
separate and distinct as not to allow of the mixture
of one with the other, as to administer a rebuke to
a person who, pursuing one course, had too much
31




362        YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
neglected the other. Not to prevent Mary from
attending at all to temporal matters, but to engage
Martha to less anxiety about them, and to a stricter
regard to things unseen and eternal.
And now, my young friends, what, in the review
of this beautiful little narrative, do I recommend?
Which of the two characters do I enjoin you to
imitate? I answer, all that was excellent in both,
without the imperfections of either.  Martha's
household diligence, without her excessive anxiety,
united with Mary's fervent devotion, without her
somewhat superabundant sensibility. So far as it
could be said of Martha, "She looked well to the
ways of her household," let my female friends imitate her due attention to home duties, her cleverness, her diligence, her dispatch, her generous attention to the comfort of her guests, especially
those who represent their Lord. Let them be
skilled in all the important functions of good housewifery. Let them, if wives, know how to make
home comfortable for their husbands; if mothers,
for their children; and if widely connected, for
their friends. Hospitality is a virtue which should
never be wanting in a female heart. She who will
not seek to please her husband's friends, but receives
them with a frown, will soon learn to leave off
pleasing him, and make their home unhappy for all
parties. But, then, let all this be without careful,
ness, and with that graceful and pleasant ease
which order, method, punctuality and dispatch will
command.




CHARACTER OF MARTHA AND MARY.      363
There are various kinds of slavery in the world,
and many classes of victims of this cruel bondage.
There is, among others, the domestic slave, whose
tyrant is her husband, and the scene of her bondage,
her home. His parsimony is so niggardly that he
will not allow her help enough to do the work of
the house, and, therefore, she must unite the character of a servant with that of a wife, a mistress,
and a mother; his selfishness is so engrossing and
exacting, that his demands for his own personal ease
and indulgence are incessant, and leave her no time
for the consideration of her own comfort; and,
withal, his temper is so bad, that all her assiduities
to please are unavailing to give satisfaction and to
avert the sallies of his irritability, discontent, and
complaint. When such a man declaims against
negro slavery, let him begin the work of emancipation at home, by raising the oppressed woman
he holds in bondage there, from the condition of a
drudge, into the station of a wife. How can she
help being careful and troubled about many things?
But, then, there are cases, not a few, in which the
slavery is self-imposed. The bondage comes from
the wife herself, from which the husband would
gladly release her, but she will not let him. Some
are slaves to neatness, and make their fidgetting
anxiety about this matter a misery to themselves
and all around them, Others to fashion, and are
always careful and troubled about elegance and refinement. Others to domestic display, parties, and
amusements, and are always full of anxiety about




364         YOUNG WOMAN S FRIEND.
making an appearance. Others to frugality, and
are ever vexing themselves to economize. In all
these ways women will torment themselves and
fill their minds with unnecessary cares and selfimposed troubles. To all these we say, "Martha,
Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many
things."
With Martha's better qualities, her domestic
cleverness and diligence, unite then the fervent
piety of Mary. Will ye be satisfied with that excellence alone which fits you only to fill up your
place in a habitation from which you may be called
away any hour? Be as diligent, I entreat you, in
business as Martha was; but be also as fervent in
spirit, serving the Lord, as Mary was. Seek to
unite all the holy virtues of the eminent saint, with
all the household excellences of the good wife,
mother, and mistress. Be all you should in your
own house, and all you ought to be in the house
of God. What your husbands, when you have
them, will desire and expect, is to see you at your
post of duty in the family. Meet their desires,
and fulfill these expectations. You ought-you
must. What Christ desires and expects, is to see
you sitting at his feet and hearing his word. Meet
these desires and expectations also. You oughtyou must. Study the following portrait of a good
wife, a cultivated mind, and a sincere Christian,
drawn by the pen of Jane Taylor:
"And she whose nobler course is seen to shine
At once with human knowledge and divine:
L                                _




CHARACTER OF MARTHA AND MARY.      365
Who mental culture, and domestic rites,
In close and graceful amity unites,
Striving to keep them in their proper place,
Not interfering with her heavenly race;
Whose constant aim it is, and fervent prayer,
On earthly ground to breathe celestial air."
0 ye too anxious and careful housewives, lessen
your solicitude!  "Be careful for nothing, but in
every thing, by prayer and supplication, let your
requests be made known unto God." The spirit
and influence of a vital piety will soften the cares
of domestic life, and alleviate, where they exist, its
sorrows, and inspire an alacrity which will make
you go cheerfully about the business of the family;
while a well-regulated attention to domestic duties,
so far from unfitting you for the exercise of devotion, will furnish the subjects of your prayers, and
prompt the approaches of your soul to God.
And now, in conclusion, let me exhibit to you
the description of true religion, as set forth in the
language of Christ to Martha. It is indispensable" One thing is needful." Yes, the care of the soul
is, indeed, needful. Mark the restriction and emphasis, one thing-only one: and it deserves this
emphasis. It is a matter of universal concern; necessary for all alike-for the rich and the poor; for
the young and the old; for male and female. Some
things are necessary for one person, but not for another-this is necessary for all alike. It is, in itself,
a matter of the highest importance, of infinite moment, compared with which all the most valuable
3,l"




366         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
objects of time and sense are but as the smallest
dust of the balance. It will promote every other
lawful and valuable interest on earth. It has been
pronounced indispensable by those who are most
capable of giving an opinion. God has declared it
to be needful, by giving his only-begotten Son to
die for it upon the cross. Jesus Christ has declared it to be needful, by enduring all the agonies
of the cross to obtain it. Angels have pronounced
it needful, by their solicitude for the salvation of
men. Apostles, martyrs, reformers, missionaries,
and ministers have given their emphatic testimony
to its necessity, by their labors, prayers, tears, and
blood. Your own judgment, in the cooler moments
of reflection, declares, by its enlightened dictates,
its necessity; so does your conscience when listening to sermons, or you are suffering affliction; so
does your heart, when the world stands revealed
before you in its vanity, emptiness, and deceit. It
is needful now in youth, to be your guide; it will
be no less so as your comforter amid the vicissitudes of life; your prop under the infirmities of
age; your living hope amid the agonies of dying
hours; your defense in the awful day of judgment,
and your preparation for the felicities of heaven.
Must not that which alone can do this, be indispensable, and be, in fact, the one thing needful  Dwell,
I beseech you, upon this representation. If religion
were as miserable and as melancholy as your mis.
taken notions of it represent, yet it is needful. It is
not what you may not have, and yet do well with.




CHARACTER OF MARTHA AND MARY.      367
out it-a superfluity, but not a necessary. No. It
is needful. It is not what other things can substitute;
the privation of which can be made up by others.
In the absence of this, you want the most necessary
thing in the universe-you must be poor amid
abounding wealth. And it is the only thing that is
indispensable. There are many other things which
may be desirable, valuable, pleasurable, and may
be lawfully pursued, but they are not indispensable.
This is absolutely so to solid happiness here and
eternal felicity hereafter.  Oh young people, call
in your vagrant thoughts, your discursive inquiries.
your divided and scattered activities, and concentrate them upon this one thing.. Settle it with
yourselves, that whatever else you may not have,
you must have this. It is well at the outset of life
to be informed by an authority that is infallible
what is most necessary for the pilgrim upon earth.
Let me entreat you to remember your own interest
in it; it is necessary for you, whose eye shall read
this page. Do, therefore, inquire-solemnly and
seriously inquire-into your own conduct in reference
to it. Say to yourselves, " Have I thought seriously about it? have I seen the importance of it?
has it lain with a due and an abiding weight upon
my mind? has it brought me in penitence, prayer,
and faith to Christ as a Saviour? am I acting in
life as if I considered religion the one thing needful  am I willing or striving to make every thing
subordinate to it-my interests, my tastes, my
pleasures, my passions?"
-I




368         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
And then, how transcendently excellent is true religion. It is the "good part which shall never be
taken from us." Excellent it is, in every view we
can take of it, for it is the reception of the first
truth, and the enjoyment of the chief good. It
makes us good, for it makes us like God, and
brings good to us, for it leads us to enjoy God. It
was the bliss of Adam, in Paradise, and is the felicity of the spirits made perfect in heaven. It is the
beginning of heaven upon earth, and will be the
consummation of heaven when we have left the
earth. It is far better than knowledge, or wealth,
or fame, or pleasure, for it will stand by us when
all these things leave us.
Yes, it is " the good part, which can never be taken
from us."  Neither force nor fraud can deprive us
of this. It is above the vicissitudes of life, and unaffected by the changes of fortune. Oh, it is glorious to think of our possessing something that bids
defiance to all the assaults of men or demons! Go
where you will, it will go with you. It is as inseparable from you, till you yourself shall abandon it, as
your soul is from your body. How much, then, is
included in that precious declaration, "The good
part which can not be taken from you," which shall
remain with you, in you, for you-when friends
have left you-health has left you-fortune has left
you-a portion all-sufficient, inalienable, eternal.
Religion is a voluntary thing.  "Mary hath
chosen that good part which can not be taken from
her." It is not the external compulsion of author



CHARACTER OF MARTHA AND MAR r.    369
ity, nor the internal compulsion of fear, but the
free choice of love. It is not mere blind, unintelligent custom; an unmeaning, heartless round of
ceremonies, performed without motive or design.
No, it is the free-will offering of the soul to God,
who says, "Give me thine heart;" and to whom the
soul replies, "I give myself to thee." Where there
is no choice, there is no religion. Hence the language of Moses to the children of Israel, " I call
heaven and earth to record this day against you,
that I have set before you life and death, blessing
and cursing: therefore choose life, that both thou
and thy seed may live."  So is it with you and me
at this moment. There, on the one hand, is religion,
with all its duties, and its privileges, its present
enjoyments, and its future eternal happiness; this
is life-the life of the soul now, and eternal life
hereafter. There, on the other hand, is ungodliness,
with all its sins and sorrows here, and its unutterable and eternal miseries hereafter. There are you,
so fearfully and wonderfully placed between the
two. And here am I-0 solemn, responsible, and
momentous position!-to urge you by every motive that can appeal to your reason, your heart,
your conscience, and even your self-love, to urge
you to choose life. You must make your election.
You can not evade the choice. One or the other
must be yours. Were you to attempt a neutrality,
it is impossible. Those that do not choose life, by
true religion, are considered by God as choosing
death. By what witnesses are you surrounded in




370         YOUNG WOMAN'S FRIEND.
this crisis of your being?  What spectators are
looking on upon this eventful scene of your history?
Parents are waiting, watching, and praying, for your
decision on the side of eternal life. With silent,
breathless earnestness, they are agonizing for your
soul and her destiny.  Ministers are fixing their
minds intently upon your situation, and, in yearning anxiety for your welfare, are saying, " 0 that
they may choose the good part which can never be
taken from  them!"   Angels, with benevolence,
hover over you, ready to commence their benevolent activities, and become as ministering spirits
to your salvation. Devils, with malignity, are collecting to rejoice, with such delight as demons can
experience, in your election of death. Father, Son,
and Holy Ghost, are waiting, witnessing, and ready
to assist your election. Yes, such value is there
attaching to one human soul-with such importance
is its decision for the choice or refusal of religion
invested, that heaven, earth, and hell, are in some
measure moved by the scene of its being called to
choose between life and death, and thus three worlds
are interested in its decision. Make, then, your
election. Pause, ponder, and pray; it is a choice
which eternity will confirm, to your unutterable
torment, or to your ineffable felicity. Almighty
God, direct their choice!
< __        ________________




"I call to remembrance the unfeigned faith that is
in thee, which dwelt first in thy grandmother Lois, and
thy mother Eunice "-2 TIMOTHY i. 5.
"The aged women likewise, that they may teach the
young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to
love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at
home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the
word of God be not blasphemed."-TITus ii. 3-5.
WHAT associations with all that is lovely are
formed by that blissful word-a mother! To that
sound the tenderest emotions of the human heart,
whether it beat in the bosom of the savage or the
sage, awaken. The beauty of that term is seen,
and its power felt, alike by the prince and the
peasant, the rustic and the philosopher. It is one
of the first words which infant lips are taught to
lisp, and the charm of which the infant heart is first
to feel. It is a note to the music of which it is
difficult to say whose soul most responsively vibrates, that of the parent or the child. Humanity,
however semi-brutalized by oppression, by ignorance, and even by vice, has rarely been sunk so low




372            YOUNG MOTHERS.
as to have the last spark of maternal love extinguished, or the last sensibility of this kind crushed
out of it. This strength of woman's love to her
child must be turned to good account, and be directed in its exercises to the best and most usefil
purposes. There is this difference, and it is a momentous one, between the maternal instinct of the
lower tribes and that of woman; the former goes
no further than provision and protection; training
forms no part of it. The same power which taught
the parent bird or beast what habits belong to its
nature, teaches also the offspring. The latter, without any pains bestowed on its education, or any
solicitude cherished for its welfare, will learn the
lessons of its existence by the intuitions of nature,
and be capable of rising to its specific perfection,
unaided either by the parent or the teacher. Not
so the young of the human species; they also require provision and protection; but more than this
they need instruction.  And who must be their
instructor? First of all, and chief of all, their
MOTHER.
But, before we reason and descant upon the subject of a mother's duties, let us look at FACTS. It
is universally admitted that scarcely any great man
has appeared in our world who did not owe much,
if not most, in the formation of his character, to a
mother's influence. In a very useful little volume,
by Dr. Jabez Burns, entitled, "The Mothers of the
Wise and Good," there is an extended series of
biographical memorials of pious and judicious moth_____ ~        - -_~~__. ___  ~__~ 




YOUNG MOTHERS.             373
ers, and eminent sons, amounting to about fifty, in
which are included Alfred the Great, Lord Bacon,
Sir Isaac Newton, Dr. Samuel Johnson, Sir William Jones, General Washington, among the illustrious of this world; together with St. Augustin,
President Edwards, Dr. Doddridge, Dr. Dwight,
Mr. Newton, Mr. Cecil, Leigh Richmond, and many
others among the good; all of whom were blessed
with pious or eminently judicious mothers, and
owed to them their eminence in the church or in
the world. From among these I select the following account of Mr. Cecil: Richard Cecil, of London, when but a young man, had pursued a bold
and determined career, till, sunk in sin, hardening
himself in infidelity, and instilling the same principles into others, there seemed no prospect of any
change. His excellent mother, however, had performed her part, and still remembered that it was
good, not only to pray always, but not to faint, or
desist upon any account. At last, one night he lay
contemplating the case of his mother: "I see,"
said he within himself, "two unquestionable facts:
first, my mother is greatly afflicted in circumstances, body, and mind; and yet I see that she
cheerfully bears up under all, by the support she
derives from constantly repairing to her closet and
her Bible; secondly, that she has a secret spring of
comfort, of which I know nothing; while I, who
give an unbounded loose to my appetites, and seek
pleasure by every means, seldom or ever find it.
If, however, there is such a secret in religion, why
32




374            YOUNG MOTHERS.
may I not find it as well as my mother?" HEe in.
stantly rose and began to pray, but was soon
damped, by recollecting that much of his mother's
comfort seemed to arise from her faith in Christ.
Now, thought he, "this Christ I have ridiculed:
He stands much in my way, and can form no part
of my prayers." In utter confusion he lay down
again; but, in process of time, conviction of sin
continuing, his difficulties were gradually removed,
his objections answered. He now listened to those
admonitions of his mother, which he had before
affected to receive with pride and scorn; yet they
had fixed themselves in his heart like a barbed
arrow; and though the effects were concealed from
her observation, yet tears would fall from his eyes
as he passed along the street, from the impression
she had made on his mind. Now he would discourse with her, and hear her without outrage,
which revived her hopes, especially as he then
attended the public worship of God. Thus he
made some progress, but felt no small difficulty in
separating from his favorite connections. Light,
however, broke into his mind, till at last he discovered that Christ Jesus, so far from " standing in the
way," as he once thought, was, indeed, "the way, the
truth, and the life, to all who come unto God by
him."
At a pastoral conference held not long since, at
which about one hundred and twenty American
clergymen, united in the bonds of a commoin faith,
were assembled, each was invited to state the hu



YOUNG MOTHERS.            375
man instrumentality to which, under the Divine
blessing, he attributed a change of heart. How
many of these, think you, gave the honor of it to
their mother? Of one hundred and twenty, above
one hundred! Here, then, are facts, which are only
selections from myriads of others, to prove a mother's power, and to demonstrate, at the same time,
her responsibility. But how shall we account for
this? What gives her this influence? What is
the secret of her power? Several things.
First, there is, no doubt, the ordinance of God.
He that created us, and formed the ties of social
life, and who gives all the sweet influences and
tender susceptibilities of our various relationships,
appointed it to be so, that maternal power over the
soul of her child should be thus mighty. It is
God's ordinance, and the woman who forgets or
neglects this, is disobedient to a Divine institute.
God has made the child to be peculiarly susceptible
of this power over his nature.
Then comes a mother's love. This is stronger,
at any rate, more tender, than even a father's.
There is more of instinct, if not of reason, in her
affection. She has had more to do with the physical being of her child, having borne him in her
womb, and fed him from her breast, and watched
him in his cradle: all this naturally and necessarily
generates a feeling which nothing else can produce.
Now love is the great motive power in, and for, human conduct. "I drew them," said God, "with
bands of a man, with cords of love." Here is the




376            YOUNG MOTHERS.
true philosophy of both man's natural constitution
and of evangelical religion. Human nature is made
to be moved and governed by love; to be drawn
with the cords of affection, rather than to be dragged
with the chains of severity. Now, woman's heart
is made to love; and this comes out more gently,
sweetly, and constrainingly, upon the child, than
from the other sex. It makes her more patient,
more ingenious, more influential. Her words are
more soft, her smile more winning, her frown more
commanding, because less terrific and repulsive.
The little floweret she has to nurture, opens its
petals more readily to the mild beams of her countenance. Hence, to repeat an expression of Monod,
already quoted in a former sermon, " The greatest
moral power in the world is that which a mother
exercises over her young child."  Nor is there
much exaggeration in that other expression, "She
who rocks the cradle, rules the world;" an expression, the truth and force of which will appear to be
founded on the next particular.
The mother has first and most to do with the
character, while it is yet in that flexible state to receive its shape. The earliest exercises of thought,
emotion, will, and conscience, are all carried on under
her eye. She has to do not only with the body in
its infancy, but with the soul in its childhood. Both
mind and heart are ia her hands at that period,
when they take their first start for good or for
evil. The children learn to lisp their first words,
and to form their first ideas, under her teaching.
__________________________          ______




YOUNG MOTHERS.             377
They are almost always in her company, and
are, insensibly to themselves, and imperceptibly to
her, receiving a right or wrong bias from her. The
first model of character they witness is hers; the
first exhibitions of right and wrong in practice are
what they see in her. They are the constant observers of the passions, the graces, the virtues, and
the faults, which come forth in her words, temper,
and actions. She is, therefore, unconsciously to
herself, educating them, not only by designed teaching, but by all she does or says in their presence.
Children are imitative creatures. During the minority of reason, imitation is the regent of the soul,
and they who are least swayed by the former are
most governed by the latter. Speech is the effect
of imitation, not intuition; and as children so early
and so insensibly learn to repeat sounds, so may
they also learn to copy actions and habits. This,
of course, applies to the mother in a fuller sense
than it does to the father, just because she is more
constantly with them in the early stages of their
existence. It is, therefore, of immense importance
that every one who sustains this relation should
have a high idea of her own power. She must be
deeply and duly impressed with the potency of her
influence. This has peculiar force in reference to
the mothers of the middling, and still more to
those of the working classes. In the upper circles
of society, the task of educating, and even support.
ing the infant, is usually devolved upon hirelings.
The nursery is not much, it is to be feared, the re_32*




378            YOUNG MOTTERS.
sort of many titled or wealthy mothers. Aristocratic habits, in some cases, can be scarcely made
to square with those of a maternal kind. Happy
women, then, who are not lifted by rank or wealth
out of the circle of those tender and constant assiduities which an infant family require. Happy
women, out of whose hand fashionable etiquette or
luxurious indolence has not taken what the poet so
pleasingly characterizes as the"Delightful task to rear the tender thought,
And teach the young idea how to shoot."
Mothers, then, should be thoroughly acquainted
with the work that is allotted to them. I speak not of
the physical training of the children; this is not my
department, nor primarily even their intellectual
culture; but their social, moral, and religious education. A mother's object and duty are, the formation of character. She has not merely to communicate knowledge, but habits. Her department
especially is to cultivate the heart, and to regulate
the life. Her aim must be, not only what her children are to know, but what they are to be and do.
She is to look at them as the future members of society, heads of families of their own, and probationers for eternity. This, I repeat, must be taken up
as the primary idea-the formation of characterfor
both worlds. Governesses, tutors, masters, will most
probably be employed in the future intellectual training; but a mother's part is from infancy to form
habits. Many have no other idea of education than
___________________




YOUNG MOTHERS.           379
the communication of knowledge. Much has been
said of late years on the distinction between instruction and education. They are by no means
synonymous. The etymology of the two words is
worth considering. To "instruct," is derived from
a Latin word, which signifies to put on or in. To
instruct is, therefore, simply to put knowledge into
the mind. The word " educate," comes also from a
Latin word, which signifies to lead or draw forth.
To educate, therefore, means to draw out the faculties of the soul, to call into exercise and invigorate
its intellectual and moral powers. Both together
constitute the duty of those who have to form the
character. Ideas must be poured in, and the recipient must be taught what do with them. We hear
much said about choosing the best masters, and a
great deal more about intellectuality, accomplishments, and other things of this nature, which may
be well enough in their place and in their measure,
but they are only subordinate to something higher
and better. They are only the tinsel work in some
cases, which embellishes the casket, and attracts the
eye of the beholder; while the invaluable jewel it
contains is left to comparative neglect.  These
things are not the whole of education, nor even the
best part of it. They are only the polish of the
surface, but not the solid gold of the substance. A
mother should look upon her offspring with the idea,
"That child has to live in two worlds, and to act a
part in both; and it is my duty to begin his educa.
tion for both, and to lay in infancy the foundation
-^ - _ -___________________I




380            YOUNG MOTHERS.
of his character and happiness for time and eternity
too. What ought to be my qualifications, and my
diligence, for such a task?"
Ah, what? Deep thoughtfulness certainly on the
momentous nature of your charge. It is a somewhat
awful thing to be a parent, especially a mother, and
to have this training of men and women, both for
time and for eternity. A distinguished philosopher
has said that " all the world is but the pupil and disciple of female influence." Every mother, therefore,
has, so far as her individual influence goes, the world
for her scholar. " Oh, woman, thy child's welfare,
for all time and all eternity too, depends much upon
thy conduct toward him during the period he is
under your influence in the first years of his being.
To you is committed the care of the infant's body,
the healthfulness, the vigor, and comfort of which
for all his future existence upon earth depend much
upon you. What would be your feelings of poignant remorse, if by any neglect of yours, if by a
fall, or an accident, the result of your carelessness,
the poor babe was injured in his spine, or distorted
in his limbs. Oh, to see that young cripple ever
presenting to you the sad memorials of your guilty
neglect. Ruined for life in bodily comfort. Yet
what is this to the sadder spectacle of a deformed and
crippled soul-a character distorted into crooked
and frightful shapes-and to have the tormenting
reflection-this, this was the result of your neglect!
The poor child in the former case may have compensation by all the sweet influences of religious




YOUNG MOTHERS.             381
submission and consolation, and the distressed
mother assuage the anguish of remorse by the
thought that her neglect may have been among the
all things that worked together for good to her son;
but where in the latter case is consolation to be
obtained, or who can wonder that such a Rachel
mourning over her lost child, and lost through her
neglect, refuses to be comforted.
Qualify yourself for maternal duties, above all
things, by sincere and eminent piety. A mother
should never forget that those little engaging creatures which sport about the room so gayly and so
innocently, with all the unconsciousness of childhood, are young immortals; beings destined to
eternity; creatures placed on earth on a probation
for heaven; and that much will depend upon her
whether their everlasting ages shall be spent by
them in torment or in bliss. This is an all but
overwhelming idea. It would almost seem as if
solicitude about this matter would be of so overpowering a degree as to extinguish parental delight.
For a mother to look at the babe that is feeding at
her breast, and smiling so sweetly in her face, as if
it meant the thanks it had not yet learnt to speak;
or to watch his slumbers in the cradle, breathing so
softly as if he lived without breathing at all, and
then to feel her soul shivering and shuddering in
the dark shadow passing over her from such a reflection as this: "Oh, shouldst thou live to be a
profligate in this world, and a fiend in the next!"
Or, instead of having a reflection so harrowing to




382            YOUNG MOTHERS.
every maternal feeling, low delightful to exult in
the hope that that dear oabe will be a holy, useful,
happy Christian on ea th, and then a glorified immortal in heaven. Such reflections ought to be
sometimes in the mind of every parent. All should
realize the sublime idea that their houses are the
seminaries for eternity, their children the scholars,
they the teachers, and evangelical religion the lesson. Yes, with every infant born into the family
comes the injunction from God-" Take this child
and bring it up for me." It is one of God's own
children by creation, sent to be trained up in the
way he should go, that is, in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Those parents who neglect the
religious education of their children, whatever else
they may impart, are more guilty than Herod. He
slew the children of others-they their own. He
slew only the body-they the soul. He slew them
by hired assassins-they slay them themselves.
We shudder at the cruelties of those who sacrificed
their babes to Moloch; but how much more dreadful an immolation do they practice, who offer up
their sons and daughters to Satan by neglecting
their religious education, and leaving them to grow
up in ignorance of God and their eternal destiny.
But can any one, will any one teach, or teach
effectually, that religion which they do not feel and
practice themselves? Therefore, we say a mother's
heart must be deeply imbued with piety herself, if
she would teach it to her children. Without this,
can she have the will to teach, the heart to pray,
I_________




YOUNG MOTHERS.            383
the right to hope? Oh, mothers, can you conceive
of a higher, nobler elevation to which in your maternal relation you can rise, than when, to the opening
mind of your wondering child, you give the first
idea of God? Or when you' direct him to that
Divine babe who was born at Bethlehem, was subject to his parents, grew into that Saviour who said,
"Suffer the little children to come unto me,' and
took them in his arms, and blessed them, and then
died for their salvation upon the cross. Or, than
when you talk to them of heaven, the dwellingplace of God and of his angels. Oh, to see the
first look of holy inquisitiveness, and the first tear
of infant piety start into the eye-to hear the first
question of concern, or the first breathing of prayer
from infant lips! How has many a woman's heart,
amid such scenes, swelled with delight, till, in an
ecstacy of feeling, she sunk upon her knees, and
breathed a mother's prayer over the child of her
heart, while he looked wonderingly up, and felt a
mysterious power come over him, which he could
neither fully express nor understand. Your religion,
if it be genuine, will teach you at once the greatness of the work, and your own insufficiency to
perform it aright in your own strength. Your business is to train mortals for earth, and immortal
beings for God, heaven, and eternity. Even an
apostle, in the view of such an object, exclaimed:
"And who is sufficient for these things?"  Your
work, as to its design, is the same as his, and you,
like him, have the depravity of human nature to,______________I




384            YOUNG MOTHERS.
contend with, and all the difficulties arising from
your own weakness and sinfulness. A mistake,
either in your sentiments, your feelings, or your
example, may be fatal to your children's eternal
welfare. Cultivate, then, a trembling consciousness
of your own insufficiency, and cast yourselves, by
believing, constant, and fervent prayer, upon God.
Be, in an eminent sense, praying mothers. Distrust yourselves, and then clothe yourselves, by
believing prayer, with Omnipotence.
Do not forget what we have already said, that
affection is the golden key fitted by God to the
wards of the lock in every human heart, to the
application of which the bolts that nothing else
could move will fly back and open with ease.
Severity is out of place in any one, but most of all
in woman. But beware of allowing affection to
degenerate into a fond and foolish indulgence. A
judicious love is as remote from this, on the one
hand, as it is from moroseness and cruelty on the
other. For if severity has slain its thousands, an
injudicious and pampering indulgence has slain its
tens of thousands. Fathers are apt to err in the
former extreme, mothers in the latter. And it not
unfrequently happens that these extremes are
played off against each other. The father, afraid
that the mother will spoil the child by indulgence,
adopts a harsh treatment to counteract the mischief
of his wife's excessive fondness; while the wife
compensates to the child for the severity of her
husband by her own excessive attention to the




YOUNG MOTHERS.               385
child's gratification. Thus, like the sharp fiost by
night, and the hot sun by day, operating in spring
to the destruction of the blossom  on which their
antagonistic influences are made to bear, the opposing treatment of the parents ruins the hapless child
that is the subject of it.*
Still, while I enjoin affection, it must not be
allowed to impair authority. A parent must not
be a tyrant, so neither must he be a slave to his
children. It is a painful, and to the parents a reproachful spectacle, to see a family like a state
where rebellion reigns rampant, the father deposed,
the scepter broken, and the insurgent children possessed of sovereign rule. A mother, as well as a
father, must be obeyed; and it is her own fault if
she is not. A persevering system of government,
where the reins are held tightly in the hand of love,
will be sure to produce submission at last. But
* One of the most artistic as well as instructive characters in that wonderful book which has burst on this country as well as the United States of America, as a literary
phenomenon, is that little imp of ignorance and wickedness
which slavery had made half idiot and half demon, but
who, by the touch of the magic wand of love, rose up from
the degradation into which the heel of oppression had trodden her, a new creature in Christ Jesus. There is more of
the true philosophy of human nature and of Christianity in
that example, than in all the volumes which writers on
humanity have ever written. And had that extraordinary
volume been written for the exhibition of no other character than that, by which to show what love can do for the
most hopeless subjects, it would not have been published
in vain.
33




386            YOUNG MOTHERS.
then it must he a mixture of kindness, wisdom, and
authority. Submission must be felt by a child to
be a duty yielded to authority, and not merely a
something won by affection. Authority must not
stiffen into severity, nor love' degenerate into coaxing. Commands should be obeyed, not only because
it is pleasant but right to do so.
A judicious mother will exercise much discrimination, and adapt her treatment to the disposition
of her children. There are as many varieties of
temperament in some families as there are children.
No two are precisely alike in their minds and character any more than in their persons. One is forward
and obtrusive, and should be checked and rebuked
-another is timid and retiring, and needs to be
encouraged and emboldened. One is more easily
wrought upon by appeals to hope-another by fear.
One is too close and reserved, and needs to have
frankness and communicativeness encouraged-another is too open and ingenuous, and should be taught
caution and self-restraint. Every child should be
a separate study. Quackery should be banished
from education as well as from medicine. One
treatment will no more suit all minds, than one
medicine or kind of food, all bodies. A woman
who does not know the peculiar dispositions of all
her children, and does not adapt her treatment to
them, must be a very indifferent mother.
The woman who would fulfill the duties of her
relationship, must surrender herself to her mission,
and be content to make some sacrifices, and endure
L -..-...___.....,._ _.,....... ~........, _..




YOUNG MOTHERS.            387
some privations. Who can witness the patient
submission of the mother-bird to such solitude and
self-denial, during the term of incubation, without
admiration at that quiet and willing separation
which instinct teaches her to make from her usual
liberty and enjoyments? A woman must be willing, for the sake of her children, to do, under the
influence of reason and religion, what the bird does
from the unintelligent impulses of nature. Her
children are a charge for which she must forego
some of the enjoyments of social life, and even some
of the pleasures of social religion. She who would
have a maternal power over her children, must give
her company to them. It is not for her to be ever
craving after parties, or to feel it a hardship that
she is denied them. The secret of her beneficent
influence lies in a life of retirement. Hence the
exhortation of the apostle in the text, to the matrons
of his time, "To teach the young women to be
sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,
to be devout, chaste, keepers at home."  We would
not have a woman incarcerated in her own house,
so as never to go abroad or enter into company.
She who is devoted to her family needs occasional
relaxation amid the pleasures of society, and especially the exhilarating engagements of public worship. There are some mothers who are such absolute slaves to their children that they scarcely ever
stir from home even to the house of God. This is
an error in one extreme, which might be avoided
by method and dispatch. But there is an opposite




388            YOUNG MOTHERS.
extreme in those who, even for the benefit of their
children, will deny themselves neither the pleasure
of social parties, nor the gratification of public
meetings. The woman who is not prepared to
make many sacrifices of this kind, for the sake of
her children, and her home, and her husband, should
never think of entering into wedded life.
Be ingenious, inventive, and studious, as to the
best method of gaining the attention, and informing
the minds of your children while young. There
are too many who imagine that education, and
especially religious education, consists in just hearing a chapter read, a catechism taught, or a
hymn repeated, and that when this is done, all is
done. The memory is the only faculty they cultivate-the intellect, affections, and conscience, are
wholly neglected. A Christian mother should set
herself to invent the best mode of gaining attention, and keeping it; and she should never weary
it, or keep it so long that it wanders off itself.
How ingenious was the device of Doddridge's
mother in teaching him Scripture history, by the
Dutch tiles of the chimney-place. The illustrated
works which, in this fertile age, are perpetually
issuing from the press, afford advantages for conveying both secular and sacred knowledge, of which
bygone times knew nothing.
Be familiar in your religious instruction. The
freedom of incidental conversation, rather than the
formality of set and stated lessons-the introduction of religious topics in the common intercourse
1.I




YOUNG MOTHERS.            389
of life, rather than the grave and forbidding annunciation of a change from secular to sacred subjects;
and the habit of referring all things to God, and
comparing the truths and maxims of the Bible with
the events of every hour, rather than the mere
lighting of a Sabbath lamp, and forcing all things
out of their current, when the season of devotion
returns-these are the means of opening the avenues to the youthful heart; and rendering religion,
with its great Author, the object not of aversion or
terror; not only of cold and distant homage, but
of mingled reverence and love. On this point
nothing can be more just and philosophic, anymore
than of higher obligation, than the direction once
communicated from the source of infinite wisdom,
"These words, which I command thee this day,
shall be in thine heart; and thou shalt teach them
diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them
when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou
walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and
when thou risest up"-Deut. vi. 6-8.
Mothers, invested as you are with such an influence, often dwell upon your responsibility. With
such a power vested in you by God, you are responsible to your children themselves. Every time
their infant or adult voices repeat that word-" My
mother," so sweet, so musical to your heart, they
urge their claims upon your best and most devoted
attention. This very sound in your ears should
awaken the deepest emotions of your soul, and the
most faithful admonitions of your conscience. You
33*




390            YOUNG MOTHERS.
are responsible to your husbands. They intiust the
education of their children to you. They seem to
say, "We will work for their support, and leave
the early education of their minds to you. We
will hereafter share all the obligation of instruction,
and the care of their minds and characters with
you, but at present, while they are so young, we
devolve this duty upon you." You are responsible
to the church of God: for family education is, or
ought to be, in the families of the godly, the chief
means of conversion. It is a fatal error for Chris-'
tian parents to look to the ministers of religion for
the conversion of their children. And, alas! it is
the error of the day. The pulpit is looked to for
those benefits which should flow from the parents'
chair. Our churches, therefore, have weighty and
righteous claims upon parents, and especially upon
mothers. Nor does your responsibility stop here,
for society at large looks to you for that beneficial
influence which you are capable of exerting.  I
repeat, here, the well-known anecdote, and which I
have given, I believe, in another work. Napoleon
once asked Madam Campan what the French nation most needed, in order that her youth might be
properly educated. Her reply was compressed in
one word-" Mothers!"  And it was a wise reply.
Not the French nation only, the world needs themChristian, intelligent, well-trained, devoted women,
to whom the destinies of the rising generation may
be safely intrusted.  That woman on whose domestic hearth, and by whose judicious maternal




YOUNG MOTHERS.             391
love, a family of industrious, godly, and publicspirited sons, or of modest, kind-hearted, prudent,
and pious daughters, are trained for future life, is an
ornament of her country, a benefactress to her species, and a blessing to posterity. I again and emphatically say, mothers understand, feel, and remember your responsibility.
But hitherto, it might be said, the sermon does
not answer to its title, as intended for, and addressed
to, young mothers. We will, therefore, now give
it a special bearing upon their case. It has been
my object, first of all, to set forth the subject of
maternal duty and responsibility in its general
aspect, apart from its relation to those to whom
they are new, that they may see it in its widest and
most comprehensive bearing, before they are reminded of its special bearing on their case. This,
I am aware, will give the appearance of a repetition
in the second part of the sermon, of some things
that were advanced in the first. But such repetitions are sometimes beneficial. In addition, therefore, to what has been said on maternal duties in
general, I shall now submit some other matters for
your special consideration.
Too many, it is to be feared, enter upon this
momentous business without consideration, and
equally, as may be expected, without preparation
or qualification. It is indeed a pitiable sight, to look
into the state of some families, and behold the hapless condition of the poor children, who have the
misfortune to be on the hands of a weak, foolish,
____________




392            YOUNG MOTHERS.
and incompetent woman. Perhaps, after all, this
may be traced one step further back, and it might
be found that they are incompetent, because their
mothers were so before them. Thus the mischief
perpetuates itself from generation to generation.
In all things it is of importance to begin well.
The beginning usually determines the progress and
the close. Errors, both in theory and practice,
however long and pertinaciously persisted in, may,
by intelligence, determination, and the blessing of
God, be corrected. Reformation would be otherwise hopeless. But how much better and easier
is it to avoid faults than to mend them. Many
mothers have seen their mistakes when it was too
late to correct them. Their children have grown
up under the influence of a bad system of domestic
government and maternal guidance, and have acquired a fixedness of bad habit which no subsequent
wisdom, firmness, severity, or affection, could correct; and the parents have had to pour out bitter
but unavailing regrets, that they had not begun life
with those views of their duties with which they are
now closing it. If a mother begins well, she is
likely to continue well, and the same is true if she
begin ill.  Her conduct toward her first child is
likely, of course, to determine her conductfor all that
follow. How momentous is it, then, at this stage
of her domestic history, to weigh well, and solemnly,
and prayerfully, her responsible situation.
Indeed, it is quite clear that this subject ought
not to be driven off by any wife till she becomes a




YOUNG MOTHERS.            393
mother. The very prospect ought to lead to a due
preparation for the expected new duties; for these
commence with the earliest anticipations of sustain
ing the maternal character. It becomes us to prepare ourselves for any situation into which we have
a confident expectation of soon entering. Forethought is given to man for the purpose of meeting
with propriety the situation and its duties to which
we are looking forward. The woman who never
studies maternal responsibilities and duties, till she
is called actually to sustain them, is not very likely
to do herself much credit in that very important
relationship. Instinct will teach the parent bird, or
beast, or fish, or insect, all that is necessary for the
well-being of their young; but not the human
parent. Here, study, reflection, forethought, and determination, are indispensable. Unhappily a young
wife, in prospect of giving birth to a child, is, in
some cases, so bowed down with an unnecessary
solicitude about her own safety; and, in others, so
absorbed with the preparations which are made for
the physical well-being and the elegant habiliments
of the expected visitant, as to forget to prepare herself for those more important duties which devolve
upon her, in relation to the mind, and heart, and
conscience, of her child. A mother who wishes to
fulfill her duties to her children, should take especial
pains to educate herself for those momentous functions.  She should read, to store her mind with
knowledge; she should reflect, observe, and gain
useful information from every quarter. Her prin



394            YOUNG MOTHERS.
ciples should be fixed, her plans laid, her purposes
formed. She must cultivate all those habits and
tempers which will fit her to teach and to govern.
She must seek to acquire thoughtfulness, careful
vigilance, quick observation, and discretion in various forms. Habits of activity and dispatch, order
and regularity, are indispensable; so is the exercise
of all the good and benevolent feelings. She must
acquire the union of gentleness and firmness, patience and the entire command of temper. It is of
immense importance, also, that she should have a
correct knowledge of human nature, and the mechanism of the human heart. And, above all things
let her remember, that piety is the vivifying spirit
of all excellence, and example the most powerful
means to enforce it. She should set out with the
recollection never absent from her mind, that
children have both eyes and ears for attention to
a mother's conduct.  Thus prepare yourself for
your important functions, and also carry on the
education of yourself, simultaneously with that of
your children. There are few situations which more
imperatively require preparation, and yet few that
receive less.
So, again, when the maternal relationship is actually formed, there is, with some mothers, such a
solicitude about the health and comfort of the babe,
such an engrossing attention to all physical matters,
united with such an exuberant delight in the child,
as a child, such a mother's pride and joyousness in
her boy-that the mind is diverted, by these circum.
t _         ______     _._________            _ _




YOUNG MOTHERS.              395
stances, from all those serious thoughts and solemn
reflections which ought to be awakened by' the
consideration, that a rational, immortal, and lapsed
creature, is committed to her charge, to be trained
for both worlds. Thus the attention is absorbed
month after month, while all this while the infant
faculties are developing; judgment, will, affection,
and conscience, at least, as to their capabilities, are
opening, but neglected, and the natural bias to evil
grows, unnoticed and unchecked. The very time
when a judicious care over the formation of character could be most advantageously exerted, is
suffered to pass by unimproved; passion is allowed
to strengthen, unrestrained; self-will, to attain a
resoluteness which stiffens into obstinacy; and the
careless mother, who, at some time or other, intended to begin a system of moral training, but
always saying, there is time enough yet, when the
reason is a little more strengthened-wonders, when
she does commence, that the subject of her discipline is so difficult to manage. And even then, she
has so neglected to prepare herself for her duties,
that she knows not how to set about them, or what,
in fact, she has to do. An ill-managed child continues growing, not only in stature and in strength,
but in his wayward disposition and obstinate selfwill. The poor mother has no control; and, as to
the father, he is too much taken up with the cares
of business to aid his imperfect helpmate; and thus
the scene is exhibited, described by Solomon, of
"a child left to himself."  Another and another are
I of business to aid his imperfect helpmate; and thus~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~




396            YOUNG MOTHERS.
added to this first-born, and are governed, mis.
governed, or not governed at all; and there are
soon seen, in rude, disobedient, and ill-natured
children, perhaps, at length, profligate sons, and
vain, silly daughters, the sad fruits of the want of
maternal wisdom.
Young mothers, begin well then. Manage that
first child with judgment; put forth all your skill,
all your affection, all your diligence and devotedness, in training him; and the habit thus acquired,
all will be comparatively easy with the others that
follow. It is the novelty of that first child, the
new affections which it calls forth, and the new interest that it makes, that are likely without care to
throw you off your guard, and divert your attention from the great work of moral training. The
first child makes the good or injudicious mother!
And as it is of immense consequence to begin
your maternal excellence with the first child, so is
it of equal importance to him, and to every one
that is added, as I have already said, to begin early.
"Education," it has been beautifully observed,
"does not begin with the alphabet. It begins with
a mother's look; with a father's nod of approbation, or sign of reproof; with a sister's gentle pressure of the hand, or a brother's noble act of forbearance; with a handful of flowers in green dells, or
on hills, or in daisy meadows; with creeping ants,
and almost imperceptible emmets; with humming
bees, and glass bee-hives; with pleasant walks in
shady lanes, and with thoughts directed in affection.




YOUNG MOTHERS.            397
ate and kindly tones and words to nature, to beauty,
to the practice of benevolence, and to the remembrance of Him who is the fountain of all good."
Yes, and even before all this can be done, and lessons of instruction can be taught the child from
flowers, and insects, and birds, the moral training
can commence with what we have already mentioned-a mother's look, her nod of approbation,
or sign of reproof. One of the greatest mistakes
into which mothers fall, is that of supposing that
the first two or three years of the child's life are
unimportant as regards his training. The truth is,
that as regards the formation of character, these
are the most important of all. It has been truly
said, that from the impressions made, the principles implanted, and the habits formed during these
years, the child's character for time and eternity
may take its complexion. It is perfectly clear that
a child, before he can speak, is susceptible of moral
training. The conscience, or moral sense may, by
a judicious woman, be developed soon after, if not
before the child has spent his first birthday. How
early may he be made to distinguish between what
his mother considers right and wrong, between what
will please, and what will displease her. Why, the
brute creatures will do this; and if they can be
taught this, may not very young children'? It is
admitted that there is more of reason in many
brutes than in very young children.  Still, even
young animals may be trained to know what they
may, and what they may not do; and so may very
34




398            YOUNG MOTHERS.
young children. We'often hear mothers say, thei(
children are too young to be taught obedience.
The mother who acts upon this maxim, that children
may have their own way for a certain number of
years, or even months, will find, to her cost, that
that lesson, at least, will not speedily be forgotten.
Moral training may and should precede that which
is intellectual.  The cultivation of the affections
and the conscience should be the commencement
of education, and this will help all the rest.
There is in some women a timidity and distrust
of their own capability, which paralyzes or prevents
the endeavors which they could make if they would
only believe in their own power. Every woman
of good, plain understanding can do more than she
imagines for the formation of her children's character. And what she is deficient in, let her supply
by reading. No mother, however qualified, should
neglect this.* Every one may learn something
from others. Fearful and timid, and somewhat
anxious mothers, be not afraid! Prayer will bring
God's help and God's blessing.
Injudicious indulgence is the most common, as it
is the most injurious danger into which a young
mother can fall. Be kind; you ought to be. An
* I again recommend Mrs. Ellis's works-and to mothers,
her book addressed to " The Mothers of England." Mrs.
Sandford's work, already quoted, as well as recommended.
"1Woman's Mission," and Monod's book. And especially
let young mothers take in that admirable periodical, " The
British Mother's Magazine," edited by Mrs. Bakewell.




YOUNG MOTHERS            399
unloving, hard-hearted mother is a double libel
upon her sex and her relationship. Love is her
power, her instrument, her talisman. She can do
nothing, worse than nothing, without it. But then
her love must be like that of the Divine Parent, who
said, "As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten."
Woman, can you say No to a child, when with winning smiles, or beseeching voice, or weeping eyes,
he asks for what it is not good he should receive 
Can you take from him what is likely to be injurious, and what will put him to pain to surrender?
Can you correct him for his faults when your heart
rises up in opposition to your judgment? Can you
put him from your arms, at a proper season for so
doing, when he clings to your neck and cries to remain? Can you exact obedience in, to him a difficult, but to you, a necessary duty? Woman, I ask
you can you stand out against a child's tears, resolute in purpose, unyielding in demand, and first
conquer your own heart, so stoutly resisting you in
order to conquer his  Or do you allow yourself to
be subdued to put an end to the contest, and by
soothing his sufferings foster the temper which
ought to be eradicated at any pains and any cost?
She who can not answer all this in the affirmative
is not fit to be a mother. There must be discipline
in a family. The parent must be obeyed. Give up
this, and you train your children for evil and not
for good. Here, again, I say begin early. Put on
the soft and easy yoke early. The horse is broken
in while a colt. Wild beasts are tamed while yet




400            YOUNG MOTHERS.
they are young. Both the human species and ani.
mals soon grow beyond the power of discipline.
A young mother is apt to devolve too much of
the care and early training of her children upon servants. Much of what may be called the drudgery
of managing children must, of necessity, be remitted
to them; but a wise woman will have her children
as much with her as possible. Next to mothers,
our nurse-maids are the most influential class of'the community, as regards young children.  They
and nursery governesses are, to a great extent, the
educators of the community. These, when carrying the children in their arms, or leading them out
for air and exercise, or attending upon them in the
nursery, or dressing or undressing them, or, indeed,
however they may be employed for them, are forming them to good or evil habits. If multitudes are
spoiled by mothers, multitudes more are spoiled by
servants; and some of the latter class have undone
all the good the former have done. Of what importance is it, then, that you should be careful as to
the persons you admit to your families in this capacity, to whom to intrust your children's minds, and
hearts, and consciences; for, depend upon it, they
have the care of those, as well as of their bodies.
Need I say to you, that all you do in training up
your children in the way they should go, should
bear directly or indirectly on their eternal welfare;
and if I seem to advert to this subject with a frequency that looks like tautology, let its tremendous
importance, and its too frequent and too great neg



YOUNG MOTHERS.            401
lect, be my apology. You will not overlook, aa
we have already remarked, the intellectual training
of your children's minds, but their moral and religious education will, I hope, be with you the chief
object of solicitude. Viewing your children as immortal beings destined to eternity, and capable of
the enjoyments of heaven, you will labor, even from
infancy, to imbue their minds with religious ideas.
It is immortality which rescues from littleness and
insignificance all that it appertains to, and hence
arises in no inconsiderable degree the exalted honor
of a mother. " She has given birth, by the sovereign ordination of the Almighty, not to a being of
a mere momentary existence, whose life will perish
like that of the beast of the field, but to an immortal! Her sucking infant, feeble and helpless as
it may appear, possesses within its bosom a rational
soul, an intellectual power, a spirit which all-devouring time cal not destroy; which can never die,
but which will outlive the splendors of the glorious
sun, and the burning brilliancy of all the material
part of heaven. Throughout the infinite ages of
eternity, when all these shall have served their purpose and answered the beneficent end of their creation, and shall have been blotted out fiom their
position in the immense regions of space, the soul
of the humblest child will shine and improve before
the eternal throne, being filled with holy delight
and divine love, and ever active in the praises of its
blessed Creator."  Mothers, such is your dignitysuch your exalted honors. Femel and value your
34*




402            YOUNG MOTHERS.
rich distinction in being called to educate the sons
and daughters of the Lord God Almighty, and preparing the holy family who are to dwell in those
many mansions of his Father's house, which the
Lord Jesus is gone to prepare.
Give yourselves up to this glorious work. But
be judicious in all you do, lest you produce a prejudice against, instead of a prepossession on behalf
of, true religion. Let your warmest affection, your
greatest cheerfulness, your most engaging smiles
be put on when you teach religion to your children.
Approach as near as possible to a seraph form. Be
you religion in all its beauty, loveliness, sanctity,
and ineffable sweetness. Let them see it in your
character as well as hear it from your lips. And
especially be careful not to enforce as a task what
should be proposed as an object of hope and a
source of delight. Let them see in you, that piety,
if in one respect it is a straight and narrow path, is
in another a way of pleasantness and a path of
peace. Do not inflict upon them as a punishment
for offenses the learning of Scripture and of hymns;
and thus convert religion, which is the foretaste of
heaven, into a penance which shall be to them like
being tormented before their time. Especially do
not make the Sabbath a day of gloom instead of
gladness, by such an accumulation of services as
shall cause the day of rest to be more physically
irksome than the common labors of the week.
And can it be necessary, after what I have said
in a former part of this sermon, to admonish you
_____-_____________       __________________ 




YOUNG MOTHERS.             403
again to pray for and with your children. How
have a mother's prayers been blessed to her children. John Randolph, a distinguished American
statesman, who had been much exposed to the
seductions of infidelity in the society into which he
had been thrown by his position, thus accounted to
a gentleman, with whom he was conversing, for his
preservation: "I believe I should have been swept
away by the flood of French infidelity, if it had not
been for one thing-the remembrance of the time,
when my sainted mother used to make me kneel
by her side, taking my little hands folded in hers,
and cause me to repeat the Lord's prayer."
" On the east end of Long Island, in one of the
most secluded spots in this country (America),
more than thirty years ago, a mother, whose rare
intellectual and moral endowments were known to
but few, made this simple record:'This morning
I rose very early to pray for my children; and
especially that my sons may be ministers and missionaries of Jesus Christ.'
"A number of years after, a friend, who was
present, thus describes this mother's dying hour:'Owing to extreme weakness, her mind wandered,
and her conversation was broken; but as she entered the valley of the shadow of death, her soul
lighted up and gilded its darkness. She made a
feeling and most appropriate prayer, and told her
husband that her views and anticipations had been
such, that she could scarcely sustain them; and that
if they had been increased she should have been
L    __~~_____             _______



404            YOUNG MOTHERS.
overwhelmed; that her Saviour had blessed her
with constant peace, and that, through all her sickness, she had never prayed for life. She dedicated
her five sons to God as ministers and missionaries
of Jesus Christ, and said that her greatest desire
was, that her children might be trained up for God.
"' She spoke with joy of the advancement of the
kingdom of Christ, and of the glorious day now
ushering in. She attempted to speak to her children, but was so exhausted, and their cries and sobs
were such, that she could say but little. Her husband then made a prayer, in which he gave her
back to God, and dedicated all they held in common, to him. She then fell into a sweet sleep,
from which she awoke in heaven.'
" The prayers of this mother have been answered. All her eight children have been'trained up
for God.' Her five sons are all' ministers - and
missionaries of Jesus Christ:' and the late Rev.
George Beecher is the first of her offspring whom
she has welcomed to heaven." And one of her
daughters is the lady already alluded to in this discourse, who has obtained a world-wide fame by her
elegant, benevolent, and pathetic story against slavery. In that lady and her work, as well as in her
able and learned brothers, we see the fruit of a
mother's prayers.
Take with you the following maxims, as summing up all that has been said:
Though a child's character is not entirely created
by the circumstances in which he is placed, espe



YOUNG MOTHERS.            405
eially as regards his mother, it is powerfully influenced by them.
Education is designed to form character, and not
merely to communicate instruction.  Agesilaus,
king of Sparta, when asked what it was in which
youth ought principally to be instructed, replied,
"In that which they have most need to practice
when men."
Obedience is the first thing a mother has to teach;
first, both in order and time, and the foundation of
all the rest. Obedience must first be taught as a
habit, and soon after inculcated as a duty.
A mother should assiduously cultivate the spirit
of curiosity in a child, and, instead of always calling him to learn, should prompt his desire to be
informed.
Young children must be sometimes contradicted
in their wishes-but never merely for the purpose
of teaching them submission, by taking from them
some thing they are pleased with.
Habits of employment, and a love of useful employment, should be taught to children; they are
not so mischievous, for the mere love of mischief,
as they are supposed to be. If they destroy articles,
it is sometimes for the purpose of investigation,
and, oftener still, for want of proper employment,
which ought to be furnished to them. In very early
childhood, a love of industry and honest independence may be instilled into a child, by teaching
him that it is honorable to be usefully employed.
One little child may feel the pleasure and practice




406            YOUNG MOTHERS.
the duty of benevolence, by doing something for
the comfort of a tender babe still more helpless
than itself.
It is of the first importance for a mother to establish in the mind of her child, an entire confidence in herself-in her wisdom, kindness, truth,
and irresistible authority.
Truth, sincerity, candor, and ingenuousness are
cardinal virtues to be taught to children. Simplicity is the beauty of a child's character; and he
should be taught from the beginning to act upon
principle, and not for the sake of being well thought
of or rewarded.
Domestic affections should be most assiduously
cultivated. When the second baby is born, the
first child should, if old enough to understand the
matter, be congratulated, and taught to regard it
as an acquisition by which his happiness is to be
increased, and in whose welfare he is to take an
interest, in conjunction with his parents. The child
who is taught affectionate obedience to parents, and
justice and kindness toward his little equals round
the domestic hearth, is being trained to fill with
propriety the station and relations of future life.
Out of the babe grows the child; from the child,
the youth; from the youth, the man; and from the
man, the immortal-and that immortal will be an
heir of glory or a child of perdition. Let this be
remembered from the beginning, and ever acted
upon.
Discipline in a family is what the public admin.




YOUNG MOTHERS.              407
istration of justice is to a state; where it is wanting, there may be very good laws, but they will
remain a dead letter, and the reign of crime and
confusion be the certain consequence.
Religion should not be regarded as one science
among many, the inculcation of which is a part of
good education, but it must be the vital principle
diffusing itself through all instruction, all rules, all
authority, all discipline, all example. At what age
is it proper, it may be asked, to begin teaching
children religion? Their father and mother are, if
true and consistent Christians, religion embodied
and alive. And as soon as they begin to know
their parents, they begin to know something about
religion. A very young child is quite aware that
his parents speak to ONE whom they do not see,
and inquiring thoughts are awakened in his mind,
before he can express them in words.*
And now, then, to sum up all, consider a mother's
charge-an immortal creature; a mother's dutyto train him up for God, heaven, and eternity; a
mother's dignity-to educate the family of the Almighty Creator of the universe; a mother's diffi* Some of these maxims are taken from a work of the
late Mrs. Copley, published by the Tract Society, and entitled, " The Young Mother; or, Affectionate Advice to an
Unmarried Daughter." A work which is most earnestly
recommended to all young mothers, or who have the prospect of becoming such, as containing more sound, practical,
and valuable advice on the physical, intellectual, and moral
training of young children, than any book I am acquainted
with.
_____________




408            YOUNG MOTHERS.
culty-to train a fallen, sinful creature to holiness
and virtue; a mother's privilege-the promise of
Divine grace to assist her in her momentous duties;
a mother's relief-to bear the burden of her cares
to God in prayer; and a mother's hope-to meet
her child in glory everlasting, and spend eternal
ages of delight with him before the throne of God
and the Lamb.
But are mothers only to engage in this work of
educating their children for God? No. Fathers,
I speak to you, for the Bible speaks to you: "Ye
fathers, provoke not your children to wrath; but
bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the
Lord." I have addressed this sermon to your wives,
because on them first devolves the- duty of training
the infant mind; not, however, to exonerate you
from, but to engage them in this blessed work, and
prepare the children for your hands. Not that they
will ever, or should ever, give up their assiduities or
withdraw their influence. No. A mother's power
is, perhaps, as great when judiciously exerted over
the adult, as over the infant child. But you, when
the children are growing up, must join your solicitude and labors with hers. They are your children
as well as hers. God will require their souls at
your hands as well as hers. Are you exercising
your authority, giving your instructions, pouring
out your prayers, affording your example, for the
salvation of your children? Is it your wish, your
ambition, your endeavor, your supplication, that
they may be religious men, or only rich ones.
|!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~




YOUNG MOTHERS.            409
Are you pouring your influence into the same channel as your holy wife? Are you helping or hindering her in her pious solicitude for the spiritual and
eternal welfare of your joint offspring? Happy,
happy couple! where there is sympathy of feeling,
and similarity of sentiment in the most momentous
concern that can engage the attention of man, of
angels, or of God-religion. Where the husband
and the wife are of one mind and one heart, not
only in reference to themselves, but in regard also
to their children, and both are engaged in training
them up for everlasting glory; I can liken such a
couple, in their benevolent efforts for their children's
welfare, only to the two angels who were sent down
from heaven to the rescue of Lot, and who, with
holy and beneficent violence, took him by the hand
to pluck him from the burning city, and conducted
him to the place of safety prepared by the mercy
of Almighty God.
35
~~~~~1~~~




APPEN DIX.
SINCE this sermon was composed and partly printed, I
have received the following letter:
" DEAR MR. JAMES-In your next sermon to Young
Women, will you kindly give some advice to common-place
mothers, who, not gifted with extraordinary affection, or
extraordinary patience, are apt to be sadly worried with
the incessant and multifarious claims of a large little family - especially where a limited income imposes unremitting
toil to arrange for ordinary domestic comfort; and the numerous inmates of a small house almost preclude the refreshment of solitary closet intercourse with that Heavenly
Father who rewardeth openly. As a class, we would gladly
be instructed how to avoid, or, at least, to surmount the
impatience and irritation so frequently engendered by the
perplexities of the nursery and the school-room; the hasty
speech, the angry action, which must be not only a hindrance to maternal influence, but perhaps even a hindrance
to the efficacy of a mother's prayers.
" Excuse the liberty I take in thus writing to you, and
with many thanks for your past valuable hints,
"Believe me, dear sir, yours very respectfully,
"A COMMON-PLACE MOTHER."
November, 1852.
This letter claims and awakens my tenderest sympathy
for the class of mothers to whom it appertains; I mean
women without the advantages of wealth, the accommodations of a nursery, and the help of servants to lighten
the load of maternal cares, and to assist in the performance
of maternal duties; women who must ever be in the midst
of the perpetually-recurring trials of temper to which the




APPENDIX.                  411
circumstances of a large little family must ever expose
them; and who may fancy themselves, as to intellectual
and other qualifications, ojly "Common-place mothers."
Let such women not despond as if they were but slenderly
fitted for their duties. The writer of the letter above
given, gives full evidence that she is not disqualified for a
mother's functions, so far as mental ability is concerned;
but perhaps she, and others in her situation, may have
something yet to learn and acquire as to temper and manner. It is evident she is in danger in these respects. The
waywardness and freaks of unamiable disposition in her
children produce petulance and irritability, and lead,
perhaps, too often, on her part, to unseemly anger. A
scold, a slap, or a shake, sometimes take the place of a
mild but firm expostulation, and calm correction. To her,
and to all in her situation, we say, what you need, and
what you must put forth all your constant and determined
effort, and wrestling supplication with God, to obtain, is
the complete subjugation of your temper. You must
bring this under control. You must acquire forbearance,
patience, and a calm serenity. It will cost you much
trouble and much prayer to attain it; but God'sgrace
will be sufficient for you. I do not, of course, counsel you
to seek after that apathetic, easy indifference which lets
the children take their own course, and for the sake of a
little ease throws up the reins of discipline.  Still a
mother must often have eyes, and not see; ears, and not
hear. A fussing, fidgety notice of every little thing that
goes wrong in the temper of all the children, will keep her
in perpetual misery. To all, then, who are in the situa.
tion of" The Common-place Mother," I again and again,
with all possible emphasis, say, subdue your irritability,
and acquire a calm, patient, forbearing, loving, and serene
mind. God will help you if you seek it. You must not
think such a frame of mind unattainable, nor allow your
provocations and temptations to be an apology for your
little sallies of bad temper.
__________________I




412                   APPENDIX.
The misfortune, perhaps, in the case of such mothers is,
that they did not begin well. The first child was not well
managed. Bad habits crept on, and now, with the family
increased, it is difficult to break them. I have known even
large, very large little families, where, by good temper,
patience, and kindness, mixed with firmness, on the part
of the mother, aided by a wise, kind, firm father, and
where there were few domestic accommodations, the children were all well-managed, and the parents happy.
It would greatly comfort, help, and encourage these
mothers, if, where such institutions were formed, they
attended the meetings of Mothers' Societies. There is a
very well-conducted one, which assembles every fortnight
in the class-room of Carr's Lane Chapel, and I recommend
my unknown correspondent, and others of her class, to
join the society. They need encouragement, and at such
meetings they find it.
As regards what is said about the opportunity for
prayer, I can hardly admit a crowded house to be an excuse for the neglect of this. Every mother has her own
chamber at command, a little sanctuary to which, when
infant voices are hushed in sleep, she can repair, and pour
out her heart to God for her children, and breathe over
some of them, slumbering, perhaps, on the bed at which
she kneels, a mother's prayers. Besides, how much of
prayer, silent and ejaculatory, yet sincere, fervent, and
believing, may be presented to God, without the formalities of devotion, or the retirement of the closet.
I again say, let no mother despair of herself because
she does not possess high intellectual qualifications; the
more of these there are, of course the better; but a temper under control-a patient, loving, forbearing disposition-a mild firmness-a gentle, but constant maintenance
of parental authority-a judicious administration of rewards and correction, will enable any woman to fill her
place with efficiency, though she may think herself to be
"A Common-place Mother."._________               __  __  _ _ _  _ _______




nlnmnIn's VBrriptinn nf a donIA  XIift.
"Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price ia
far above rubies."-PRovwEaBs xxxi 10.
IF any one should desire a book which combines
grandeur of subject with beauty of expression; the
sublimest theology with the soundest morality; the
widest variety of topic, with an obvious unity of
design; the most ancient history, with the most
fascinating poetry; the profoundest philosophy,
with the plainest maxims of human conduct; pathetic narratives, with picturesque descriptions of
character; in short, a book which shall as truly
gratify the taste by the elegance of its composition,
as it shall sanctify the heart by the purity of its
doctrines; and thus, while it opens the glories of
heaven, and prepares the soul for possessing and
enjoying them, shall furnish a source of neverfailing pleasure upon earth-I say, if such a book be
sought for, it can be found in the Bible, and only in
the Bible. This precious volume more than answers the description just given. Where, in all
the range of inspired or uninspired literature, can
be Found a delineation of female excellence, 1 will
35*




414 SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
not say equal to, but worthy to be compared with,
that which forms the subject of the present discourse?
We have here a picture, of which it is difficult to
say which is the most striking, the correctness of
the drawing, or the richness of the coloring. Both
display a master's hand, and though delineated three
thousand years ago, it is still true to nature, when
we have removed some of the effects of time, retouched some of the lines that have been clouded
and obscured by length of years, and thrown in a
few explanatory additions, to adapt it to modern
habits. It is impossible to look at it without admiration and delight. It adds to the interest, to know
that it is the production of a female artist. It is
the description of a good wife, drawn by the hand
of a mother, for the guidance of her son in the
selection of a companion for life. They are " the
words of King Lemuel, the prophecy that his mother
taught him." Who this man was is a matter of
uncertainty. It was not Solomon, as some have
supposed. The original Hebrew has many Chaldaisms, which are found in. no other part of the book
of Proverbs, and which afford a cogent argument
that it was written by another hand, and perhaps
after the captivity. The whole passage is written
with great art, being a kind of poem, containing
twenty-two verses, of which each in succession, like
some of tne Psalms, begins with a different letter of
the Hebrew alphabet.  Whoever Lemuel might
have been, he had the privilege of a most eminent
mother. "The admonitory verses with which the




SOLOMON S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE. 415
chapter commences, composed by this distinguished
woman for her son, when in the flower of youth
and high expectation, are an inimitable production,
as well in respect to their actual materials, as the
delicacy with which they are selected. Instead of
attempting to lay down rules concerning matters
of state and political government, the illustrious
writer confines herself, with the nicest and most
becoming art, to a recommendation of the gentler
virtues of temperance, benevolence, and mercy, and
to a minute and unparalleled delineation of the
female character, which might bid fairest to promote
the happiness of her son in connubial life." What
a pattern of maternal excellence is this mother of
King Lemuel, and we may well imagine, that in
this inimitable portrait she drew her own likeness.
What sons we should see, if all were blessed with
such mothers as she was!
In taking up this delineation, we shall consider
FIRST, the inquiry which introduces it. "Who can
find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above
rubies." This interrogation implies the rarity and
the worth of the object sought.  The question
might have been more forcible in those times than
in ours, for such a blessing might have been, and no
doubt was, more scarce than it is now. True it is,
the picture is so admirable, that even now a perfect
resemblance is not to be found everywhere. Yet,
if extraordinary excellence is not often found, happily that which is far above mediocrity is by no
means rare. And why should there not be in every
_J




416  SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
female bosom an intense desire to rise to a perfect
conformity to this beautiful pattern? How much
more to be valued by her happy possessor is this.
than all the jewels with which so many women are
fond of being decked, or than the largest and the
purest diamond in the mines of the east.!
We proceed, SECONDLY, to consider the exquisite
delineation of " the virtuous woman" now before
us. But really I feel as if to touch it were to spoil
it, and as though comments were almost like painting the tulip, perfuming the rose, or attempting to
add brilliancy to the sun.
Instead of following the order of the verses, and
adopting the regular expository method, I shall
give a formal arrangement, for the completion of
which, in something like symmetrical relation of
parts, I shall dislocate the verses and place them
under separate heads and titles. The authoress
reserves piety for the climax, or culminating point
of her description, and winds up the whole thus:
" Favor is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman that feareth the Lord she shall be praised." I
shall make this our starting-point. We would remark, that the family to which the matron here
described is supposed to belong is one in good circumstances, to the prosperity of which her own
conduct aud wise management materially contribute. We shall considerI. Her piety, as set forth in the verses just
quoted, in which the essence of true religion is comprised in that phrase-" The fear of the Lord:"




SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE. 417
which means the cultivation and exercise of all
right and holy dispositions toward God. Yes, this
is religion, to have the heart right toward God.
And we hold that this is not merely the gilded
ornament that towers upward to heaven, and crowns
and beautifies the building at the apex, though it is
all this; but it is more than this, for it is the base
of the whole structure, and supports the noble pyramid of its varied excellences. It is this which
makes them strong and stable, and insures at once
their proportions and their perpetuity. True piety,
instead of setting aside a single female excellence,
clothes them all with a Divine sanction, harmonizes
the demands of God with the claims of man, converts the ordinary duties of domestic life into a
means of preparation for that glorious world where
the social ties no longer exist, and softens the cares,
anxieties and sorrows, with which vwoman's lot in
this world is but too often sadly oppressed. Whatever else a woman may be, without this she is
lamentably deficient. " Favor," or as the word signifies, gracefulness, "is deceitful, and beauty is
vain."  The face of a beautiful woman ought to be
an index of the mind; and when all is fair without,
as it is said of the king's daughter in the Psalm, all
should be glorious within. Never does an ill-furnished mind and an ill-favored heart appear more
revolting than when seen united, and in contrast,
with personal attractions. And yet how often do
elegance of manners, and loveliness of person, conceal dispositions which are in perfect contrast with




418 SOLOMON S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
them, and bitterly disappoint the man who has been
captivated by them, and who in his choice of a
wife has been led by no other considerations than
mere personal charms. " Let beauty have its due
praise, and suppose what you will of it-suppose
all that the poets say of it to be true, still the text
tells you it is vain, it is in its nature transient, fleeting, perishing; it is the flower of the spring which
must fade in autumn; and when the blossom falls,
if no fruit succeeds, of what value, I pray, is the
tree? The grave is already opening for the most
elegant person that moves, and the worms are waiting to feed on the fairest face that is beholden."
But religion is an excellance and a beauty which
time can not corrode, old age wrinkle, disease spoil,
nor death destroy; but which, after living and thriving amid all other decays in this world, shall flourish in the next in all the vigor of immortal youth.
II. We next note here conjugal excellence.
"The heart of her husband doth safely trust in
her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She
will do him good, and not evil, all the days of her
life."-11, 12.
Those are good really, who are good relatively;
and especially in wedded life. Confidence between
man and wife is the basis of domestic happiness.
There can not possibly be happiness where this is
wanting. Suspicion and jealousy must drive felicity out of doors.  In regard to the "virtuous
woman," her husband trusts her chastity.  Her
fidelity is as inviolable as the covenant of the Most




SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE. 419
High, and her purity unsullied as the light of
heaven. What a torment is jealousy in the bosom of husband or wife! wormwood and gall are
sweet to it. He trusts her fidelity in the management of his affairs, and knows that all his domestic
interests are safe in her hands. With such a man
ager at home, he can go without anxiety to his
daily business-travel to distant places-or remain,
when necessary, by ever so long an absence, away
from home. He shall have "no need of spoil:"
shall have no necessity, through an improvident
and unthrifty wife, for spoiling others of their property. "He need not," says Matthew Henry, "be
griping and scraping abroad, as those must be,
whose wives are proud and wasteful at home."
She manages his affairs, so that he is always beforehand, and has such plenty of his own, that he is in
no temptation to prey upon his neighbors.  He
thinks himself so happy in her, that he envies not
those who have most of the wealth of this world;
he needs it not-he has enough in having such a
wife. Happy the couple that have such satisfaction as this in each other! It is too well known
to be denied, that if many husbands make their
wives wretched by their unkindness, many wives
make their husbands poor by unthriftiness. Many
a man has been tempted to cheat his creditors
through the improvidence, bad management, and
extravagance of his wife. The " virtuous woman"
will study to do her husband good, and to avoid
doing him evil, all the days of her life. She will




420  SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
be inventive, ingenious, and laborious to promote
his comfort, his health, and his interests, will
smoothen by her sweet words his brow, when
wrinkled with care; hush the sigh that misfortune
extorts from his bosom; will answer with gentleness the sharp words that in moments of irritation
drop from his lips-and will do all this, not by fits
and starts in genial moods, but continually.
But this is not all; for, on looking onward in the
chapter, we find another reference to her conduct
and influence as a wife. " Her husband is known
in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of
the land."-23.. By the gates are meant the place
of magisterial assembly and business, which, in ancient times, was in apartments over the gates of the
city. In these public convocations, a good wife will
make her husband known, and add to his public
reputation in various ways. Her prudent conduct
in her domestic arrangements will enable him to
leave home with confidence to attend to public
business. She is not so engrossing of his company
as to prevent his becoming a public benefactor and
blessing. By the happiness which she imparts to
him at their own fireside, she sends him abroad,
not with a downcast look, as if he had left-a heavy
trouble at home, or carried it everywhere with
him; but with a cheerful countenance, as though
he had just come from the scene and seat of his
chief earthly bliss. By her proper care of his personal appearance, in the elegance and neatness of
his apparel, and which, in ancient times, was the




SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE. 421
work of her hands; and especially by the force of
her holy example sustaining and encouraging his
excellence, she raises the honor and increases the
respect of her husband. He is better known and
more esteemed as the husband of such a wife.
Can a woman rise to higher honors than this-to be
so excellent and estimable as to augment the public
respectability of her husband? Still, let husbands
take care that they do not shine only in borrowed
splendor, and stand indebted for all their esteem to
their wives. Let them so act, and be such men, that
the honor they receive on account of their wives be
only an addition to the greater honor that belongs
to themselves. It is the comfort and glory of a
man, to be better known and more respected, on account of his wife; but it is to his discredit to be
known and respected only by his wife. It is a
poor, mean affair for a man to go through society
with no better patent than his wife's excellence.
Such a woman must feel herself, though in one
sense exalted, in another degraded, by being the
wife of a man who has no public honor but what
he derives from her. It must bring misery when
the husband finds himself ever in a total eclipse of
his wife; except, indeed, he be too stupid to feel
it. Alas for the wife of such a man! Let this in.
duce care and caution in the formation of the mar.
riage-union. Unequal matches are not often happy
ones.
III. Observe, now, her industry as a woman.
"She seeketh wool and flax, and worketh will36




422   SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
ingly with her hands. She layeth her hands to the
spindle, and her hands hold the distaff"-13, 19.
This is in allusion to the customs of the times,
and is a description of personal habits of manual
labor and energetic employment. All textures of
wool and flax, cotton and silk, were, before the in
vention of machinery, woven out of thread and
yarn, spun by the hand, through the instrumentality
of the distaff and the spindle. Nor was this occupation confined exclusively to the laboring classes;
for queens, princesses, and peeresses disdained not
to be thus employed, amid the more courtly occupations of their rank.*
It is well worthy of attention, that out of the
twenty-two verses of this elegant poem, eleven are
taken up in setting forth the virtue and practice of
*Many of the classic authors refer to this. Homer,
both in his Iliad and his Odyssey, alludes to it. So does
Virgil; and Ovid advises maidens, if they would have the
favor of Minerva, to learn to use the distaff, to card, and to
spin. Lucretia was found spinning with her maids, when
her husband visited her from the camp. The wool spun by
Tarquin's wife with the distaff and spindle, long remained
in the temple. Alexander the Great is said to have shown
to the Persian princesses his garments made by his mother.
Our English records of female royalty furnish similar
proofs of hand-industry. The magnificent, far-famed tapestry of Bayeux was the work of William the First's queen.
The messengers of Henry to Katherine of Arragon, announcing her divorce, found her with a skein of red silk
round her neck, being at work with her maids. Beautiful
memorials are still preserved of Queen Katherine Parr's
manual skill.-Bridges on the Proverbs.
I   ______~ _._ ~.~.._...^..^_.^  ~_..~.,.._._..




SOLOMON S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE. 423
the matron's industry, in its various relations and
duties. And her industry is represented as eminently utilitarian. Indolence is sometimes thought
and said to be one of the failings to which women
are exposed; especially in single, and more frequently in high life. It is censurable even there;
how much more in the state of matrimony; and
they who are given up to it as maidens, are in imminent peril of carrying the habit forward into the
state of the wife, the mother, and the mistress.
An indolent woman at the head of the domestic
economy, must throw all into confusion. It is
neither asked nor expected that her energies should
be expended on works which belong to servants;
but an active female, even where there are servants
at command, might always find something to do
without stepping out of her proper place. The
mistress of an establishment, especially if she be
also a wife and a mother, can never plead want of
occupation as an excuse for personal laziness.
What a sad example does such a woman set to
her servants and her children! No vice is more
contagious than this, nor is any example more
likely to be imitated by those around.*
* Simonides, a Greek poet, who lived very early in Grecian history, was the author of the oldest satire extant.
He employed his sarcastic powers on the female sex. He
tells us that the gods formed the souls of women out of those
seeds and principles which compose several kinds of animals and elements; and that their good and bad dispositions arise in them according as such and such seeds and
principles predominate in their constitutions. The slut,




424 SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
IV. We next notice her thriftiness as a wife and
female head of a family.
"She considereth a field, and buyeth it; with the
fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard"-16.
" She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant"-24.      "She per.
ceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle
goeth not out by night"-18.*
the scold, the sluggard, the cunning, the variable, the obsequious, the morose, the vain, the ill-favored, and the
industrious, are all traced back to their original prototypes;
and perhaps the ingenuity of my readers, without any
nelp from me, will enable them to recognize what animals
and elements most appropriately set forth these qualities
of human character. " The tenth and last species," says
the poet, " were made out of the bee; and happy is the
man who gets such an one for his wife. She is altogether
faultless and unblameable. Her family flourishes and improves by her good management. She loves her husband,
and is beloved by him. She brings him a race of beautiful
and virtuous children. She distinguishes herself among
her sex. She is surrounded with graces. She never sits
among the loose tribe of women, nor passes away her time
with them in wanton discourses. She is full of virtue and
prudence, and is the best wife that Jupiter can bestow on
man."
"I shall conclude these iambics," says the writer in the
Spectator, " with the motto of this paper, which is a fragment of the same author:' A man can not possess any
thing that is better than a good woman, or any thing worse
than a bad one.' "-Spectator, vol. iii. 200.
* It may be doubted whether in the state of society to
which this description belongs there were any manufacturers of household stuffs, but such as were thus produced in
families, and the demand having no other source of supply,
1._________




SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE. 425
From these verses it is apparent that in early
times women were extensively employed even in
buying and selling, in such matters as suited their
sex; and did not withdraw their attention from
other duties, in aiding their husbands to increase
the wealth and comforts of their families. This
manufactory in the house, this traffic with the
merchants, this buying a piece of ground and
planting a vineyard, sounds hardly feminine in our
ears; but it gives us an insight into those times,
and shows howv little the tyranny of man over woman, which afterward prevailed in Eastern countries
stimulated domestic production to an extent of which we
can hardly have any adequate conception. Many families
would produce much more than they could consume, and,
as there was always a demand and a profitable remuneration for such products, a thrifty housewife would be industrious herself, and keep all hands at work, especially
at those articles, the fine linen and girdles, which were
most in demand. The traveling merchants called at the
homes of the people, bought up their articles, and then resold them. At the present day, we see offered for sale in
Eastern towns, either at first or second-hand, the outer
garments, spun and woven by the Arab females in their
tents, the admired carpets made by the women of Persia,
and even the rich embroideries and other elegant productions of the needle, which are prepared by the town ladies
in their harems.-Kitto's "Daily Bible Illustrations" on
this chapter. I can not lose this opportunity of recommending, in the strongest language and most emphatic manner I
can command, this invaluable series of books. I believe,
for the elucidation of the historic parts of Scripture, there
is nothing comparable with them in the English or *ny oth
er language.




426  SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
as time rolled on, had yet been practiced. Woman
is here seen as man's companion, counselor and
helper, even to the making of provision for the
support of the family. Modern customs render
this, to a considerable extent, unnecessary. Woman's place, ordinarily, is the parlor and the nursery,
rather than the shop. Buying and selling are the
business of the husband, and taking care of the
family that of the wife; and the less, as a general
rule, the latter has to do with the former the better. It is an indelible reproach to any man, to
live in idleness upon the labors of his wife, and
leave her to provide for the children also. A
month's labor at the treadmill, or a month's penance on bread and water, would be a suitable regimen for such drones. Yet necessity dispenses
with ordinary laws; and where there are no children to be provided for, or Where their comfort
and education can be attended to also, it is by no
means an unseemly spectacle to witness a clever
and devoted woman occasionally at the side of her
husband in the scenes of his trade. This applies,
of course, only to small concerns, for in large ones
there is no need of it. No wife will feel herself degraded by such occupations. The grateful and affectionate smile of her husband, and the consciousness that she is lightening his cares and aiding him
to support his family, will be an ample reward for
her labor.*
# It is, however, a great unhappiness for the laboring
classes of this and other manufacturing towns, that married
I




SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE. 427
V. We notice, next, her judgment and skill in her
domestic arrangements.
" She riseth, also, while it is yet night, and giveth
meat to her household, and a portion to her maid.
ens"-15.   " She looketh well to the ways of her
household, and eateth not the bread of idleness"-27.
" Her candle goeth not out by night"-19. " She
is like the merchants' ships: she bringeth her food
from afar"-14. "She is not afraid of the snow
for her household, for all her household are clothed
with scarlet:" or, as it should be rendered, "in
double garments"-21.
How many points there are here worthy of notice and imitation! She knows the value of time,
and redeems it, and makes the day as long as she
can by early rising. Nothing wastes time more
than unnecessary slumbers. Sleep is a temporary
death, and no more of it should be taken than prepares for a healthful resurrection in the morning.
Even the rising of our Lord from the grave took
place very early in the morning, as if, among the
minor lessons he would teach us by the very circumwomen, who are not only wives, but mothers, are so extensively employed in our manufactories. In some cases it may
be necessary, and even beneficial; but, as a general practice,
it is fraught with much discomfort to the family. And, in
order to render it unnecessary, let the husband be more
industrious, more sober, more temperate in all things; and
forego the earnings of his wife at the manufactory, that
she may be looking after her children, and providing him
with a clean, comfortable, and well-ordered home. This
takes away one temptation to frequent the ale-house.




428 SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
stances of that wondrous and glorious event, one is,
that our own morning figure of the resurrection, in
rising from our bed, should take place early. A
slothful woman, who wastes the precious hours of
prime in bed, is a sad example to her family. How
can she teach the valuable habit of early rising to
her children and servants; or, how can she " look
well to the ways of her household, and give meat
to her maidens," by setting in order her household
affairs, if she leave not her downy pillow till the
day is far spent? And then, it is said of the good
wife, "her candle goeth not out by night."  When
the days are short and the nights long, she takes
no advantage of this for the indulgence of sloth.
Though early up to lengthen the day at that end,
she is not in haste to retire to rest, and so shorten it
at the other. Each hour has its work, and the work
of the hour is done in the hour. The ways of her
household are the constant matter of oversight and
inspection. And such is the fruit of her good management, that when winter comes, her servants and
children need not fear frost or snow, for, both inside and out, they are protected from the cold.
How interesting a scene is it, on a bleak. cheerless
day, when the east wind is piercing, and the sleet is
driving before it, to see a large family, through the
activity of an industrious and kind mother and mistress, all clad in warm garments. In a complete
sense of " looking well to the ways of her household," it must include not only good housewifery,
but a proper attention to their moral habits, their




SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE. 429
religious instruction, attendance on the means of
grace, giving them time for secret prayer and reading God's Word, the daily ordinance of family worship, the careful observance of the Sabbath, anxious
watchfulness over their manners, habits, and connections; in short, considering servants, not as beasts
of burden, not as mere mercenaries, but as a
solemn and responsible trust for God and eternity.
Who can have the claim to the title of a virtuous
woman, who does not feel this weight of family
responsibility?* And what a responsibility! Let
every mistress read it, tremble and pray.  We
most urgently enjoin all the acquirements of good
and clever housewifery, of frugality without stinginess, plenty without profusion, attention without
slavery, order without fastidiousness, dispatch without hurry, and elegance without extravagance.
"This bear in mind," said an accomplished writer,
in giving his advice to his son, when he is directing
him as to the choice of a wife, "that if she is not
frugal, if she is not what is called a good manager,
if she does not pique herself on her knowledge of
family affairs, and laying out her money to the best
advantage, let her be ever so sweetly tempered,
gracefully made, or elegantly accomplished, she is
no wife for a tradesman; and all these amiable
talents will but open just so many ways to ruin.
In short, remember your mother, who was so exquisitely versed in this art, that her dress, her table,
and every other particular, appeared rather splendid
* Bridges.




430 SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
than otherwise; and yet, good housewifery was
the foundation of all; and her bills, to my certain
knowledge, were a fourth less than most of her
neighbors, who had hardly cleanliness to boast, in
return for their awkward liberality."  This is all
true, and all good, as far as it goes. But then, it is
not enough, for to this must be added all that moral
and religious oversight and care, which Mr. Bridges,
in the above quotation, has so justly included in it.
VI. I may introduce now her conduct as a mother.
" Her children arise up, and call her blessed"-28.
Happy the children of such a mother, who receive
the lessons of wisdom taught them by her lips, as
well as by the example of piety, prudence, and
sobriety which she set them in her conduct. With
their character formed under the plastic influence
of her own, and the consciousness how much they
owe to her influence, they rise up around her with
feelings of gratitude and veneration; when surrounded with families of their own, they teach her
grand-children to reverence her; and when she has
descended to the tomb, they pour those blessings
over her grave which they had during her life been
accustomed to offer round her chair, or in their
evening prayer for her welfare. Let it be the holy
and honorable ambition of every mother to be
crowned with the blessings of her children, which
she that is foolish or sinful never can be. Let
every mother seriously ponder what she would
leally wish her daughters to be; what by general
consent they would be praised for being, and that
L _          ______                 _________




SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE. 431
let her be herself.  The mother should be as
perfect a model as possible for her daughters to
imitate.
In my last sermon I gave directions to young
mothers in reference to the early training of their
children; let me now give a few hints to those
whose children are rising up around them, or have
become young men and women. I say, then, be
much at home yourselves, and that is the way, if
your temper, spirit, and conduct be loving and
agreeable, to keep them at home. Make them fond
of your society, by causing them to feel that you
are fond of theirs. Throw an air of cheerfulness
over the circle. A mother's smile is the sunshine
of the domestic group, in which all delight to bask.
Be happy yourselves, and you will then make your
children happy around you. And yet let it not be
a cheerfulness that degenerates into levity. Nothing can be more unseemly than a frivolous mother,
indulging in undignified mirth, or frothy, gossiping,
or slanderous discourse, in the midst of grown-up
sons and daughters. To be called a " rattle" is no
commendation of a mother. Of all subjects on
which a discreet mother will never joke with her
children, love and courtship will be the last. A
vise and good woman will avoid all trifling with
matters of such delicacy and importance. To her
sons she will exhibit in herself the model after
which she would wish them to choose a wife; and
to her daughters, the pattern she would wish them
to copy, should they ever become wives and moth



432   SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
ers themselves. There should be a high and digni.
fied bearing, softened by the tenderest affection;
and a kindness and affability uncorrupted by a low
familiarity. Her authority should insure the prompt
obedience of her children, whatever be their age, as
her wisdom should attract their confidence, and her
love their gratitude and affection. She must be
thus their companion, counselor, and comforter,
and by the frankness of her own disposition encourage theirs. They must be so treated as to be made
to feel that they have no momentous secrets they
could wish to conceal from her. And especially
should she exhibit to them all the holiness, the
meekness, the consistency, the beauty and attractiveness of true religion; the sanctifying, humbling.
spiritualizing power of genuine godliness in prosperity, and all its Divine support and heavenly
consolation in adversity, that they may be won by
her example to piety, and thus rise up not only on
earth, and in time, but in heaven, and through all
eternity, to call her blessed.
VII. She is not destitute of taste and elegance.
"She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her
clothing is silk and purple"-22.
Though not addicted to the pride of dress, and
the vanity of ornaments, she maintains, even by
its external, conventional signs, her rank and sta.
tion in society.  Her wardrobe and her furniture
are in keeping with her circumstances, her virtues,
and her industry. And it is right they should be.
No, my female friends, religion is not at war with
_______              _____ _______.  I




SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE. 433
elegance and good taste. It is itself the "beauty
of holiness," and the richest and purest moral taste.
Neither despise nor idolize these matters.  Be
neither a sloven nor a dressed doll; neither the
slave nor the cynic of fashion; neither excite disgust by your want of attention to little matters of
order, becomingness, and ornament: nor court admiration by splendor and expensiveness. Be consistent in all your modes with your station. Affect
not the pride of meanness any more than that of
magnificence. And as to the elegant occupations
for leisure hours of modern times, we refer you
back to what, in former sermons, we have said on
the subject of accomplishments.
VII. Note her prudence in speech.
"She openeth her mouth in wisdom"-26.
She thinks before she speaks; and therefore nei
ther introduces a bad subject, nor disgraces a good
one by an improper manner of discoursing upon it.
She has too just a sense of the value of the gift of
speech, and too accurate an idea of the power of
words for good or for evil, to employ them in idle
gossip, petty scandal, or slanderous backbiting.
She is neither too taciturn, knowing that speech
is given to be employed; nor too talkative, equally
knowing that "in the multitude of words there
wanteth not sin"-Prov. x. 29.    The apostle
James saith:' If any man offend not in word, the
same is a perfect man." This, perhaps, is still
more true of a woman, inasmuch as she is thought
to have a greater propensity to loquacity. The




434 SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
gift of speech is never more adorned than when
employed in the soft and gentle tones of woman's
voice, uttering the words of wisdom and kindness;
never more dissonant and repulsive than when her
tongue is voluble in folly or falsehood, malice and
passion. Have we not all known husbands, of
whose time a large portion has been employed in
explaining the mistakes, correcting the follies, healing the feuds, and repairing the mischiefs of wives
who opened their mouths, but not in wisdom?
While on the other hand, has not many an Abigail,
by her discreet and timely interposition and wise
address, averted the storm that was gathering over
the family from the churlish language of Nabal, her
husband? Blessed is that woman who knows how
to charm, to repose the troubled thoughts of an
angry or a vexed husband-who can discern when
to be silent, and when to speak; and how by the
sweet harpings of her voice to lull his agitated
mind, and drive the evil spirit out of his breast.
Ah! it is at home that this wisdom of speech is
most wanted.   What stormy scenes sometimes
arise from the absence of it, which drive peace from
the family, and fill it with harsh discords and fearful strifes!
IX. Is benevolence no part of the spirit and conduct of the virtuous woman? Let the text reply.
In her tongue is the law of kindness"-26. " She
stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy"-20.
Her kindness begins with thoughts, goes on to
L._.~~_~~_ _.._~  ~._ _.,,.. ~.........._.._




SOLOMON S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE. 435
words, and ends in works. In her heart, it is as a
principle of charity; upon her tongue, as a law to
dictate gentle, and soothing, and pleasing words.
She speaks, and her expressions are as the droppings of the honeycomb, or the falling of the dew.
But her mercy is in her hand, as well as in hel
heart, and upon her lips. She does not merely say
to the hungry and shivering, "Be ye warmed, and
be ye filled," but she giveth them wherewith to
satisfy their hunger and clothe their limbs. And
her kindliness of disposition is the golden thread
which runs through all her life, and binds up all her
actions, not only into a womanly but saintly benevolence. Her spindle and distaff, so industriously
employed, are worked not for herself alone, but for
the poor and needy. She is not so taken up with
those within the circle of her family, as to forget
those that are without. Her benevolence is like a
spring, which not only refreshes and fertilizes the
spot where it gushes up and makes all verdant
round its margin, but flows onward to carry its
benefits to those at a distance. She adorneth herself with " silk and purple,' and maketh " coverings
of tapestry" for her own habitation, and clotheth
her household in scarlet; but then, also, like Dorcas, she maketh garments for the poor. Oh, how
beautifully does this feature of kindness come into
the portrait; how does this diamond of mercy
sparkle amid the other jewelry of this charming
character. What a blank would the absence of it
have made. How we should have turned away,




436 SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
not with admiration, but with disgust, from this in.
dustry, frugality, conjugal affection, good house.
wifery, maternal excellency, prudence, and ele.
gance, if all these virtues had been exhibited in the
iron setting of selfishness, instead of the gold of
mercy. If this pattern-woman for all household
virtues had been presented to us so swallowed up
in her own well-provided-for family, as to care
nothing for the starving and naked families around
her; why, then, a dark shadow would have fallen
upon this otherwise bright character, and its luminousness would have passed at once, if not into total,
yet into partial eclipse. But it is not so. Mercy,
like a mid-day sun, rises upon the scene, and sheds
its luster upon all. Christian women, you, you,
must be the brightest patterns of kindness and
mercy which our selfish world contains, and add to
temperance, patience, and godliness, Christian kindness and charity.
X. Such a character can not be unnoticed or un.
acknowledged; nor can such excellence pass through
the world without admiration and commendation;
and we now, therefore, note the honor and esteem
with which she is treated.
"Strength and honor are her clothing; and she
shall rejoice in time to come"-25. "Her husband
also, and he praiseth her"-28. "Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them
all"-29. "Favor is deceitful, and beauty is vain;
but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be
praised"-30.  "Give her of the fruits of her
I-_




SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE. 437
hands, and let her own works praise her in the
gates"-31.
She seeks not human applause, and therefore
acts no theatrical part; nor for the sake of praise,
affects display. Content with the love and esteem
of her husband, the veneration and affection of her
children, and the respect of her friends, she is not
anxious to obtrude herself upon public attention, to
shine in brilliant circles, or to have even her excellence made the subject of general commendation.
Still unsought praise will be given her. Spontaneous tribute and free-will offerings of honor and
respect will be paid her. Her husband wil be
the first to, perceive, and the foremost to acknowledge her excellence. If a'grateful man, he will
make her sensible of his just appreciation of her
excellences, not by mere fondling and caresses, but
by respect for her judgment and character; by
commending her to her children, and bidding them
follow her example. Cases do sometimes occur of
men so inferior to their wives, and so conscious of
that inferiority, as to be jealous of their ascendency
in the family, and to be envious of the talents and
the virtues they can not imitate.  A  husband,
blessed with such a woman as is described in this
chapter, should not be backward, on suitable occasions, to let others know the estimate he forms of
her character. True it is that a wise man will not
be ever talking of his wife's excellences; but he
will, at proper seasons, feel a pride and a pleasure
in exalting her in public estimation, and the public
37*




438  SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
will not fail to give her the fruits of her doings.
"Let every one," says Bishop Patrick, "extol her
virtue. Let her not want the just commendation
of her pious labors. But while some are magnified
for the nobleness of their stock from whence they
sprang, others for their fortune, others for their
beauty, others for other things let the good deeds
which she herself hath done be publicly praised in
the greatest assemblies, where, if all men shall be
silent, her own works will declare her excellent
works."  And to use the poetic language of another prelate,'The crown which her own hands
have thus formed, shall be placed upon her head, as
it were by general consent, even in this life; and
her good deeds celebrated in public assemblies,
shall diffuse an odor grateful as the smell of Eden,
or as the cloud of frankincense ascending from the
holy altar. When her task is ended, the answer of
a good conscience, and the blessings of all around,
sweeter than the sweetest music, shall chant her
to her repose, till awakened on the great morning
of the world, descending angels shall introduce this
daughter of Jerusalem into the joy of her Lord."*
Such, then, is the character of the virtuous woman,
as delineated by the mother of King Lemuel. By
expanding the miniature as it was drawn by the
pen of inspiration into a large and full-length picture, I have, perhaps, done injustice to the subject.
If so, let those who are of this opinion perpetually
and closely study the original as it is found in the
* Bishop Horne.
-______ ___.                             _ __,




SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE. 439
book of Proverbs. "There," says Matthew Henry,
in' his quaint style, "is shut up this looking-glass
for ladies, which they are desired to open and dress
themselves by; and if they do so, their adorning
will be found to praise, and honor, and glory, at
the appearing of Jesus Christ."
If, however, a wife devoid of all that constitutes
her real excellence, shall run counter to this beautiful picture-if instead of being the glory of her
husband, she shall seek to rival him, and shall either
attempt in the domestic firmament to be the greater
light to rule the day, or to throw him into eclipse,
before whom she should be content with partial
obscuration; if instead of being content to be praised
by him, and deeming his approving smile a worthier
object of ambition, and a richer reward than the
gaze of admiration and the language of flattery from
strangers; if she be a wife who opposes wantonly
his tastes, or neglects his comfort; who contemns
his opinion, and contradicts him with asperity, and
resents with unseemly heat his real or unintentional
slights; who exhibits indolence but not industry in
the management of his household, and either by
slovenliness allows all things to sink into uncleanness and confusion, or by extravagance hastens on
the approach of poverty and ruin; who neglects
-even her children, and causes them to rise up in
grief and shame for their mother; who gives her
maidens constant occasion for reproach and complaint, on account of her ill-temper and worse conduct; who is restless and uneasy at home, but
____________________




440  SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
gracious and engaging everywhere else; who by
her own conduct makes her husband happier everywhere else than at his own fireside: " or if she be
a wife using her empire over her husband to turn
him away from the Lord, as the wife of Jehoram,
whose fatal influence the Holy Spirit paints in the
single expression,'Jehoram walked in the ways of
the kings of Israel, like as did the house of Ahab;
for he had the daughter of Ahab to wife;' a wife,
in short, who constrains her husband to sigh in
secret over the hour when he was blind enough to
sue her hand, and look forward to the day when he
shall lay before the tribunal of God the eternal
wrongs she has done him-what plea can she offer
for her conduct?"*
There are some few things of a general character,
which may be worthy of notice in surveying this
portraiture.
It is a very true and judicious remark of Mr.
Bridges, that the standard of godliness here exhibited, is not that of a religious recluse, shut up from
active obligations, under pretense of greater sanctity
and consecration to God. Here are none of those
habits of monastic asceticism, that are extolled by
some, as the highest point of Christian perfection.
Nor does any other part of Scripture, either of
the Old Testament or the New, put up a finger-post
that points to the convent. We repeat what we
affirmed in a former sermon, that no single practice
that pleaded the sanction of religion, was ever the
* Monod.




SOLOMON S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE. 441
source of so much pollution or vice, or inflicted so
deep a-wound on morals, as monasticism. Woman's natural state is the conjugal one, and her mis.
sion isto her husband, into which she is not usually,
and ought not to be, unwilling, at the call of Providence, and with all due discretion, to enter; and
for which she should assiduously prepare herself.
Still, should there be some women of singular disinterestedness or exalted piety, who, either for the
benefit of near relations, or from motives of zeal
and mercy, and not from a superstitious notion of
the superior sanctity of celibacy, shall be willing to
forego the duties and felicities of the wife and the
mother; who, I ask, shall forbid them? Such was
the mind of the apostle Paul, whose words on this
subject have been so eagerly wrested in favor of
erroneous opinions. "If I search," says Monod,
"throughout the whole world, for the type of the
most useful, the most pure, the most Christian
charity, I nowhere find all these conditions better
fulfilled than in the good aunt, who, by a marvelous sacrifice, accepts the fatigues and the cares of
maternity, without knowing its ineffable consolations; mother! yea, and, may be, more than mother,
when the question is of serving and supporting, yet
setting herself aside the moment the question is only
of advantage and pleasure. Sad she may be, but
her sadness is heavenly, and transforms itself completely into love and sacrifice."
But if no family engagements bind you, extend
your view further; find out a family in all that have




442 SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
need of you, comforting the afflicted, forming or
supporting charitable institutions, seconding a pious
minister in his labors-in short, in every good work
for which God appears to have expressly reserved
your liberty. Or embrace, for you may, a yet
vaster sphere.  Embrace the world, if you will,
provided it be in the spirit of charity. In fine,
accomplish your mission so faithfully, that when the
hour of your death shall arrive, all may rejoice in
the happy isolation which permitted you thus to
devote yourself; and that, amid the tender regrets
which shall follow your mortal remains to the tomb,
it may no longer be discerned, in the sacrifice which
you have made, whether you were wife or sister, or
aunt or mother, relative or stranger."
It can not fail, I think, to impress every reader of
this beautiful description of the " virtuous woman,"
that the delineation includes chiefly the active virtues of the female character. It is the bustling,
energetic, and prosperous female, surrounded by
circumstances that call forth her industrious assiduities, invest her with power, and array her with
public honor; rather than the quiet, gentle, and retired sufferer, struggling with adversity, or crushed
by oppression, whose virtues consist of submission
to the will of God; and patient, uncomplaining
endurance of the wrongs of man, perhaps of her
husband; and the brightness of whose character is
heavenward, to be admired by God and angels,
rather than earthward, to be seen and extolled by
men. To the latter we would say, look up with




BOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE. 443
believing prayer to God, for the grace that is necessary to fill your dark sphere with the illumination
of that holy virtue, which, with lunar radiance,
shines brightest by night. Little of the glory of
the character which we have been describing may
fall upon you in those secluded shades amid which
you are called to dwell. In solitude, with no eye
to pity, no voice to soothe, no hand to help, you
may be called to drink the cup of sorrow. Well,
drink it, as did the greatest and holiest sufferer that
ever passed through our vale of tears, saying, " The
cup which my Father giveth me to drink, shall I not
drink it?" and the time will come, when he who
loveth you better than you love yourself, shall wipe
away all tears from your eyes. To those who, by
divine grace, are copying the pattern set before them
in this discourse, and are in circumstances to do so,
I would say, Over all these fine traits of active,
energetic character, cast the vail of gentleness,
modesty, and humility. Let the passive virtues
of your sex blend with, and soften the active ones.
Be sure to single out that lovely feature, " the law
of kindness is on her tongue." With all this masculine energy in womanly conduct, unite feminine
tenderness and softness. Whatever else in charac
ter you may be, still be a woman, with all a woman's
grace and loveliness; and while, as a wife, a mother,
and a mistress, you wield the authority, and exert
the influence which belongs to you, remember still;
there is one in the family-I mean your husbandwhose authority is still higher than your own, and
I




444 SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
that it is at once your duty, and will be for your
happiness, meekly and gracefully, though not abjectly and crouchingly, to bow to him.
Young women, I beseech you to make yourselves
familiar with this exquisite passage of Holy Writ.
It must be a study for you. There is much, very
much, to be learned from it. You will here see
that piety is the broadest and most solid basis of
all female excellence, and so far from interfering
with temporal duties, will, wherever it is genuine,
quicken attention to them. Godliness is profitable
for all things, and helps the pursuit of all that is
lawful. There is not a good quality of character,
nor a single earthly interest, which it will not effectually promote.  Do not allow yourselves to be
imposed upon by the misrepresentations of its enemies, who would persuade you, if they could, that
piety is unfriendly to general character, and inimical to personal happiness; that it enjoins duties
unfriendly, and forbids pleasures essential to youthful enjoyment.  Upon examination, however, it
will be found that this objection to it, like all others; is founded upon air. Is there a virtue or a
practice which can adorn or bless humanity, which
it does not enjoin? And as to its more solemn,
and what some would consider its more sorrowful
duties-I mean repentance-I would remind you
that these are not the only exercises of true religion;
for there is the joy unspeakable of faith, as well as
the grief of contrition; and that the latter leads on
to the former, just as the shower in the sultry heat




SOLOMON S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE. 445
of summer portends and produces a cooler atmosphere. Religion forbids no pleasures, but such as
are injurious to the soul, and substitutes the sub.
stance of happiness for its shadows. It resembles
a fine country in spring, where the hedges bloom,
and every thorn produces a flower.
Perhaps it will be thought by some it is a pity
that a delineation of the virtuous man, equally
minute, comprehensive, and impressive, had not
been drawn by the same hand which gave us this
picture of female excellence.  In default of this,
however, it is observable how much of what is here
said may be copied into the character and conduct
of the other sex. There is scarcely a rule of conduct here presented, which may not, with a little
change, be observed by the husband, the father, and
the master. This virtuous woman's fidelity to her
husband, personal industry, good management, and
diligence in her family, consideration for the comfort and necessities of others, kindness of speech
and pity for the poor, courtesy to all, and especially
her sincere and practical piety, belong to her husband, and are required of him, as well as of herself.
These virtues are appropriate to both sexes. They
are the general principles of excellence, though
adapted here to the female sex. And therefore we
recommend husbands to study this portraiture, not
only to see what their wives should be, but what is
required of themselves also.
But who of either sex is sufficient for these
things?  None but they whose sufficiency is of




446 SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
God; and He, to the docile and humble petitioners at the footstool or His grace, will ever bestow that gracious aid which is equal to the exigency of every case. In reminding you of your
various duties, and calling upon you to construct a
character which, after exhibiting to the admiration
of every beholder on earth its graceful proportions,
shall endure with unfading beauty and undiminished
grandeur through eternity; I would also remind
you of your own indecision, feebleness of purpose,
exposure to temptation, and consequent necessity
of divine assistance. To obtain this help you must
have faith in Christ, the source of all spiritual efficacy, and earnest prayer to God, and none shall
seek this grace in vain.
I THUS close a series of discourses, on which, in
consequence of the rarity of the effort and the delicacy of the subject, I entered, not indeed without
some hope, but with much fear and trembling. So
far as the pleasure of my own mind in preparing
and preaching these sermons, and the monthly attendance upon their delivery from the pulpit, are concerned, my expectations have been more than realized. In laying down rules, pointing out defects, and
the occasional comparison of the excellences and the
faults of the sexes, I have had a somewhat difficult
task to perform, and in the performance of which
I can scarcely presume to hope I have given satisfaction to all parties. I must be contented, and it
is no small matter to be so, with the conviction
that I have endeavored to hold the balance with a




SOLOMON S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE. 447
steady and impartial hand; and in this I have satis.
fled my own conscience. I have praised, where
praise was called for, and that was very often, but
my commendation has not degenerated into flattery; and I have blamed, when blame was just, but
it has been without acrimony. My object has been
to promote the happiness of both sexes, by improving the character of that one on which so much of
the happiness of both depends; and to advance the
welfare of society by purifying its earthly source.
How far I have succeeded it is impossible I should
ever know, and in the absence of certainty must be
comforted with the pleasures of hope.
I have looked upon woman as related to both
worlds, as being bound to this by the ties of a wife,
a mother, and a mistress; and to that which is to
come, by the grander and more enduring bond of
immortality; and therefore, as having not only
social excellence to obtain, but that which is individual in special relation to God, and heaven, and
eternity. I have contemplated you, my young
friends, as the future wives, mothers, and mistresses
of the next generation, and have endeavored to
prepare you for discharging the functions of these
momentous relationships. It has been my aim in
these sermons, to open and prepare for you a
smooth passage through this earthly state, gathering out as many stones, and planting as many
flowers, as I could. And imperfect as may have
been my counsels, and defective as may have been
my views, I am confident that if my advice be taken




448 SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
and my rules observed, though there may be much
sorrow in reserve for you, there will not be wanting
a tolerable share of consolation and happiness. It
will be your fault, not mine, if life be a dreary
blank-a desert without an oasis-a wilderness
without a spring.
But I have' looked beyond this world, to that
state, where I see you, with all these tender ties
dropped from around you, and you yourself standing alone in your individuality and immortality.
I am duly aware, and I wish you to be so, that you
sustain a personal relationship to God, which requires an appropriate and prescribed line of conduct
toward him, and for the neglect of which, no other
duties, excellences, or merits whatever, can be a
substitute. It is not merely what you have been as
a woman in society, or as a wife, a mother, or a
mistress in the family, but what you have been toward God, that will decide your lot in the day of
judgment. You may have been the most exalted,
and noble, and learned of women, the most faithful
of wives, the most devoted of mothers, and the
kindest of mistresses; but if all this, while you
have not had repentance toward God, faith in our
Lord Jesus, and true holiness, these domestic virtues, as they had in themselves no relation, and in
their performance, no reference to God, so in the
end they will meet no recompense from him, and
instead of hearing him say, " Well done, good and
faithful servant," you will hear nothing more than
"They had their reward."




SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE. 449
Young women, contemplate your situation as I
do, and as I now present it to you. There, fur.
ther than the eye can reach, stretches out the vast
plain of earthly existence, with all its varied landscape, its numerous roads, its busy population, its
duties, its pleasures, and its dangers: and there are
you, traveling across it, and needing guidance, as
sistance, protection, and comfort by the way. Step
by step you are going on, never stopping, but ever
advancing-to what? To that boundless ocean of
eternity which lies beyond, on which you must soon
embark, and on which so many of your fellow-travelers are every hour adventuring. Yes, yes, you
are emigrants passing through time to embark for
eternity; and ought you not, like other emigrants,
to prepare for the voyage, and for the country to
which you are going? Shall your attention be so
taken up with the plain across which you are traveling, as to forget your embarkation upon the
ocean that lies beyond it? Does one of all the
emigrants which are now crowding to our colonies,
forget for a waking moment, after his determination
is fixed, that he is soon to leave his country for one
across the sea? Oh, no. And will you forget that
you must soon-how soon you know not; perhaps
next year, or next month-emigrate to eternity?
By what motive shall I induce you to prepare for
eternity? What? Only by itself, for if eternity be
not strong enough to induce you to prepare for eternity, by what other motive can I hope to succeed'
I now, in conclusion, refer you to that day, and
l__________________.__




450 SOLOMON'S DESCRIPTION OF A GOOD WIFE.
that scene, when the results of all ministerial efforts
-and of this among the rest-for the spiritual
welfare of mankind, shall be ascertained and made
public. Before that dread tribunal you and I must
appear. Not an individual that has heard, or that
shall read these discourses, will be absent; and
among the things then to be brought into judgment
will be this feeble, yet sincere and earnest, en
deavor for your spiritual benefit. In reference to
some of whom it will be said, I fear, I have been
"the savor of death unto death;" while it is my
prayer and my expectation, that to others I have been
"the savor of life unto life."  May there be very
many of the latter description! "For what is our
hope, or joy, or crown of rejoicing? Are not even
ye in the presence of our Lord Jesus Christ at his
coming. For ye are our glory and joy.
THE END.
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