II BECOMING AN AMERICAN A Patriotic ScKool Drama, By J. R. CIBBINS, EDEN. IDAHO. 1920. » Iff BECOMING AN AMERICAN A. Patriotic School Drama, By J. R. C1BBINS. EDEN, IDAHO, 1920. >0>!><«HOHCHWHKHWKWH«HKH^ 1# ' TMP92-009283 APR ©CI.D 54564 Introduction, A problem made plain to Ataericaris by the late war, wa c that they had failed to make proper effort to Americ inize foreigners. Universiti js, colleges, high schools and grades are working at this huge task with more or less success. Teachers every- where should give this subject earnest study. NVith the above ideas in view, the following little skit w'nch we will call ''Beco ni v? a 1 Am iriean. M was writtm. The author hopes it will awaken pu- pils, teachers and parents to a s.mse of duty to a foreigner. The questions and answers for examination, ex- cept the last imoersmation. ring true t) the real thing as observed in courts by the author The Finn should be dressed in furs, the Pole in blue flinnel shirt, striped overalls and red neck- kerchief and any costumes may be worn by the others to suit th J fancy of impersonators and the exigency of the occasion. Russell Arnold should have on a soldier's uniform. The Sketch may be localized by giving charac- ters and places home names, making it much more interesting. Becoming an American, By J. R. GibBins. Cast of Characters. Russell Arnold, returned from ove r seas, Dallas Harper, the clerk. Judge Stuart, rather brisk and hurried. Hjarus Rantalla. a Finn. Gioviano Mallesano, an Italian. John Mackielinsky, a Pole. i arl Carlson, a Swede. Oliver Dwight, an Englishman, Friends of the candidates, at least one and as many more as room and available material admits Stage Properties are at least five chairs, a table or office desk, flag", and large ledger, [Dallas Harper is seated at table, arranging papers. Enter Russell Arnold. ) Russell Arnold. Hello! Dallas. Dallas. Well! Russell! {Shaking hands.) How glad I am to see you again! When did it happen? Russeli. Oh, a few weeks since. How are you? Dallas. Fine and Dandy. Russell. Just' thought I'd look in and see what's doing in Court. Big day for the Judge? Dallas. No. Just a few Bohunks and Swedes trying for citizenship. So few the Judge thought he'd hold the session in this ante-room. Here's the Judge now. Judge Stuart, allow me to present to you, Russell Arnold, just returned from over there Judge. (Very briskly.) Glad to know you, Sir. (Shaking hands.) Just call in the men, Russell, one at a time. Let their friends come. Seat them there. (Points to seats. Then speaking to Russell.) Won't you have a chair? How are things in Europe? Unsettled ourse. Russell. Yes, Sir. We hardly even knew jur n policy in Russia. (Enter Clerk with Finn and friends. ) Dallas. Your Honor, this isHjarus Rantalla. Judge, Has he his petition? Dallas. Yes, Your Honor. Here it is, (Reading.) My name is Hjarus Rantalla. My place of residence is Troy, Doniphan County, Kansas. Present occu- pation, bricklayer. I was born on the 17th day of May, 1887 in Finland. I emigrated to the United States from Helsingfors on the 3rd day of October 1907 and arrived at the port of New York on the 21st day of November. I declared my intention to become a citizen of the United States in the Dis- trict Court of Doniphan County, Kansas,. June 10, 1911. I am not married. I owe allegiance to Fin- land. I can hardly speak the English language. I have resided in the United States since 1907. I have never before petitioned for citizenship. (Folds paper.) Judge. So you can't speak English well? Hjarus. My niece, she read, she write for me. Judge. You speak fairly well, and we would like* to make a citizen of you, if you prove proper ma- terial. Do you believe in polygamy or anarchy? Hjarus. Puly— what? Judge, Polygamy. Hjarus. I no understand. Judge. Anarchy? Hjarus. I no understand. Judge. That settles the matter. You'il havi get a book and study up. Return the first Monday in April. There is no use in your applying until you can understand. (Finn goes out crestfallen and -'"-.'-. ) Ca ]j the next> (j ]erkt (ToRusselL) Well. I wish the C.erk .would hurry. (Enter Clerk with Italian and his friends. ) Judge. Have you his petition? Dallsa. Yes, Your Honor. This applicant's name is Gioviano M^lle^ano his place of residence is Troy Kansas, occupation, section hand, Is married and has five children, and has never before made appli- cation for citizenship in tne United States. Judge. Perhaps you had best have this appli- nant sit down. I believe he can think better. Do you believe in polvgamy or anarchy? Gioviano. (Wildly) Yes, Yes, Your Honor. Judge. Do you mean to say thit you uphold po- lygamy and the red hand? Gioviano. (Discovering his error.) No! No! by the love of H j aven! No! Yoar Honor! Judge. Well, What is the State Legislature and how are its members elected? Gioviano. Electa, electa. Dey not electa. Dey maka — stata — a senata. Dey maka representa- teef — Dey maka — Judge. What do you. mean, don't they elect? Gioviano. Yes! Yes! Dey electa — dey maka — they divida — (Wrings his hands.) Judge, See here, speak plainly. Well, in general, what does the Constitution provide? Gioviano. De Constitution provida — h >usa — de white housa — de presidenta — Judge. When did Kansas become a state? Gioviano. It becoma in 1775. Judge. Kansas? Gioviano. No — No — she didna Lecoma — she didna becoma — Judge. Well, what did happen in 1775? >vian >. Nothing did hapoiri Honor, nothing-, Your Honor, \ Judge. Where is the capital of the United States? Gioviano. Topeka, Your Honor, Topeka. •I ulge. This wont do. You get a book and study up. You may return to the next session of Court in April. Gioviano, (Groaning.) All right — you fel — you no see me again. Too hard. Too hard. ( He goes out. ) His Friend. Your Honor, this man has been king fourteen hours a. day. He is a good chap but has had no chance to study. Judge. Well, if he can't study, there's no use in his applying. Clerk, call the next. (To the Friend) We!!, go after the fellow, Sae what you can do for him. The next, Clerk. (The Italian and his friend go out. The Judge sneaking to Russell, says — ) My! How this* drags out They are waiting for me in the next ward. (Dallas returns with a Pole and friends.) •I idge. Have you his petition there, Clerk? Dallas. Yes, Your Honor. His name is John Mackielinsky. His place of residence is Wathena, Kansas. He emigrated from Warsaw, Poland. He declared his intention t) become a citizen of the United States on the third day of December, 1912. He speaks the English language and has resided inuously in the United States since the 16th day of March, 1907. All right, John Mackielonsky. What is a county? Pole. It is a so — big — square of the state.' (Ex- tending his hands in measurement.) Judge. How many counties are there in Kansas? Pole There are 100 and there are five. Judge. One hundred five? Pole. Ya. One hundred five. Judge. What is Congr Pole. Congress ees — so bij. (Extends hands.) Judge. We don't measure Congress in sizes. What is Congress made up of? Pole- Congress is made up of — Yas. Judge. Yes! Pole. Ya. Judge. Now see her °, why do we have Con- gress? What is it for? Pole. De Senator. Judge. You mean the senators atten 1? Wh3 else? Pole. Ya—de— senators — Ya —iey coom. Judge. Who else. Pole. Ya. Judge. Why haven't you studied the thing: out? You have been up here once before and failed! Friend. He's rattled, Your honor. He did bet- ter for me coming up on the train. Pole. No one me help. Everybody too busy. I have moaey — get book. Nobody me teach. No night school last year. Judge. Well, you'll have to do something about it your self. Study up-and come again next term. " .ie. I no coom back next time. I coom now. You can no send me away. I no go. I want citzen paper. I- have dem too. You get out. [Pushes the Clerk. Scuffles for paper.) I have dem. Judge. (Angrily.) Show this man out of Court. We don't want him for a citizen. (The clerk pushes the Pole out and he is followed by his friends.) Judge. Call the next, CJerk. (The clerk goes out.) Russell. Is it true there were no night schools last year? . Judge. I positive. I have heard said * t the foreigners have not att< many night schools suspended. Russell. They do not advertise the night schools Eieiently. Dances have more publicity. They ertise it once or twice in the want ads and let ;o at that. (Enter Clerk with Swede.) { Dallas. Here, Your Honor, is Carl Carlson who .•petitions for citizsnship. Judge. Have you his petition there? Dallas. It is here, Sir. Judge. Let me hear it in full. Dallas. (Reads from paper.) My name is Carl Carl- sun. My place of residence is Leona, Kansas. My \m is farmer. I emigrated to the United es from Stockholm, Sweden on the 17th day of July 1903, and arrived in the United States at the Port of New York, on August 3, on the Lusatania. I declared my intent'on N > 10S423 to become a cit- n of the United States on the 21st day of Octo- . 1912, at Troy, in the District Court of Doni- n county, Kansas. I am married. My wife's ne is Christine. She was born in Sweden and : lives near Leona. I have two children, Th I- . born July 4th. 1915, and Licl.vig, born May 2, I. I now owe allegiance to Gustave V of Swe- { am able to speak the English language and led in the United States since 1903 and ;ince 1912. I have never before oetition- itizenship. Ole Oleson, Lief Ericsson. of the above na lesses have I herewith ent my to become a citizen of the United Stat- idge- All right, C irlson. Y order. Step tip hei >e if your knowledge is sufficient to make you a good citizen. What pow- er makes the ordinary laws of the United States? Carl- Congress makes the laws, Your Honor. Judge. Well, when did Kansas become a state? Carl. 1851. Judge. 51? Carl* No, No, Your Honor. 1861, Judge. All right. Name a Senator from Kansas. Carl. The Senator is Mr. Capper. Judge. What is the highest law in the United Stat. Carl. The Constitution, Sir. Judge. Who is President? Carl. President Wilson. Judge. Do you believe in polygamy or anarch Carl. No, Sir, No, Your Honor, It ban wrong. Judge. This man is well qualified. Let him register in the book. {He registers.) Let him take the oath. Dallas. Repeat after me: I hereby declare on Carl. I hereby declare on oath Dallas, that I absolutely and entirely renoui and abjure forever Dallas, all allegiance and fidelity to every for- eign power Carl, all allegiance and fidelity to every foreign PQVS Dallas, prince, potentate, state or sovereignty Carl, prince, potentate, state or sovereignty Dallas, and particularly to Gustuve V of Sweden Carl, and particularly to Gustave V of Sweden Dallas of whom I have heretofore been a sub- Carl. of whom I have heretofore been a sub- ject; Dallas, that I will support and defend the Con- stitution and the laws of the United States of Am- erica Carl, that I will support and defend the Con- stitution and the laws of the United States of Am- erica Dallas, against all enemies, foreign and domes- tic Carl, against all enemies, foreign and domestic Dallas, and that I will bear true faith and alle- giance to the same Carl, and that I will bear true faith and allegi- ance to the same, Dallas. So help me God. Carl. So help me God. Judge. You are now a citizen of the United States and may get your second papers from the clerk. (Swede receives papers and goes out.) Well, I must be off. Russell. Just a minute, Judge. Doesn't it seem to you that this is all wrong? Do you think we've tried hard enough to make these men citizens? Judge. I don't believe we have. But what can I do? My duty is to see whether they are prepar- ed or not If they are not, I can't admit them. That's the law. Russell Dallas, why didn't you shake hands with that intelligent young Swede, and tell him you were glad that he was an American citizen. Don't you want him to be a loyal citizen? Dallas. Yes. Of course I do. I didn't suppose it made any difference. Russell. Indeed, it makes a difference. It is up to all of us to make these fellow right glad that they are Americans. Since 1 am back, I iove the stars and stripes better than ever. I was willing to give up life for my country, and now I want to live for it and to give the other fellows a chance to belong to it. The crying need, Russell, is effi- cient night schools with teachers who are capable and willing. Visit them right in their homes and convince them for a surety that we are in earnest about them and want them for American citizens. And when they attain citizenship, welcome them right royally with music, cheers and celebrations. Let's hunt up this Swede and give him the glad hand ( Young Englishman and friends rush in. ) Friend. Your Honor, is it too late to examine this man? Judge. Well, I am needed badly at the Court in equity, but I want always to make citizens of those prepared. Has he his petition? Friend. Yes, Your Honor. Here it is. (Hands it to the clerk. ) Judge. Read it. Dallas. (Reading.) My name is Oliver Dwight. I emigrated to the United States from near Liver- pool, England, August, 1912, and arrived at New York, September 3, 1912. My place of residence is Troy, Kansas. Present occupation, workman in Clark Bros. Mill. I declared my intention to be- come a citizen of the United States on my arrival at Troy. The war came on and I enlisted in the United States army but was rejected in the exam- ination. My declaration is number 107462, regis- tered in the District Court of Doniphan County, Kansas. I am single. I now owe allegience to George V of England. I speak English fluently, having attended the schools of my native land. I 10 have resided in the United States continuously since 1912. I have never heretofore petitioned for United States citizenship. Wid Clark, Walter B. Montgomery, John Norman, Witnesses, each of whom has known me for two years. I herewith present my intentions to become a United States Citizen. Judge. Very good, Oliver Dwight. Let us now see if your knowledge is sufficient. Repeat the Preamble to the Constitution. Oliver. We, the people of the United States, in order to form a more perfect Union, establish jus- tice, insure domestic tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general welfare and secure the blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our posterity, do ordain and establish this Consti- tution for the United States of America. Judge. (Surprised that he answers correctly), Fine ! Now name the eighteen powers of Congress. Oliver. La-ba-ra, Es-ca-pa, Es-pa-ca, Da-da-ra, Pa-ma-pa, Pa-ex-ma— Judge. Here ! What's that ? Oliver. Oh, you see that's what my teacher gave me to help remember them. If you permit, I should like to write it out. Judge. Write it. I want to see it anyway. Oliver. ( Writes it ana hands to Judge) . Judge. Well, hows that going to help? Oliver. Why, you see the "1" in "la" is for lay and collect taxes; the 'V is for borrow money. Judge. Well, let's have them. Oliver. Lay and collect taxes: borrow money; regulate commerce; establish naturalization laws; coin money; punish counterfeiters; establish post- offices and post- roads; promote science; constitute inferior courts; deline and punish piracies; declare war; raise armies; provide a navy: make rules for governing armed forces: provide for calling forth the militia; provide for organizing the militia; exercise legislation in national capital site and make laws necessary to execute the foregoing powers. Judge. Well, since you have dona so nicely with this question, I will depart a little from regular custom. Possibly you can name the Presidents of the United States in order. Oliver. Oh yes. Wash, Ad, Jeff, Mad, Mon, Ad, Jack, Van, Har, Ty, Polk, Tay, Fill, Pierce. Buck, Line, John, Grant, Hay, Gar, Ar, Cleve, Har, Cleve, Mack, Roosevelt, Taft, Wilson. Judge. See here, D wight. When I ask you for the names of the Presidents, do not recite a poem like that to me. Oliver. Well, you see that helps me remember. Since you were so kind before, I'll just write this OUt tOO. (He writes). Judge. Ail right. I would like to see it myself. Oliver. {Hands it to Judge). Judge, (Looking at it). Oh, I see ! That's a key to the names. (Hands it back to Oliver). Well, let's have them. Oliver. Washington, Adams, Jefferson, Madi- son, Monroe, Adams, Jackson, VanBuren, Harri- son, Tyler, Polk, Taylor, Fillmore, Pierce, Bu- chanan, Lincoln, Johnson, Grant, Hayes, Garfield, Arthur, Cleveland, Harrison, Cleveland, McKinley Roosevelt, Taft and Wilson. Judge. Well, I'm to examine you on Govern- ment—not history. Just what, in general, does the Constitution provide? Oliver- For the government of the United States Judge. How many branches. Oliver. Three. Legislative, or law-making; Executive, or law- enforcing; Judicial, or law-ex- plaining. Judge. Where does Congress meet? Oliver Washington, D. C. Judge. Name its branches. Oliver. The Senate and the House of Repre- sentatives Judge. Where does the State Legislature meet? Oliver. Topeka. Judge. Your answer to next question will not fail you in your examination, : — Who was your teacher? Oliver. Charley Butts. Judge. Well, now I am going to give you the supreme test. If the United States government should declare war on Great Britain and call for volunteers for its armies, what would you do? Oliver. I would enlist in the United States Army, for while I loved England when her son, yet, when I came to your country it was with the full intention of loving her and living and dying for her, if necessary. I hold that flag as dear as any of your native sons. Judge (earnestly), Register this man, Mr. Clerk. (Oliver is registered.) Let him subscribe to the oath. You need not have him repeat it. He knows it nOW as well as you Or I. (Oliver subscribes to the- oath) You may now receive your second papers. (Oliver receives papers from the Clerk). Allow me to congrat- ulate you, Mr. Dwight, on your splendid examin- ation and to shake hands with a new citizen of the United States. Arnold, this man did well because he understands the English language thoroughly and correctly. What these foreigners need is more English Language. Here, (enthusiastically, He write* a check from a check book he takes from his pocket) . Here is my check, signed in blank. Fill it for a thous- and dollars, if necessary. You and Dallas here rent a room, hire teachers, run a night school and hunt up these poor fellows who have failed and teach them to become good Americans. Well, I must be off about that land case. (Leaves in his characteristic brisk manner. Arnold and Harper look smil- ingly and pleasedly at each other. ) [Curtain^ NOTE.— This Play is in two editions. This one is the first and shorter. The other in- cludes "An Irish Family"— husband, wife and children. Very funny. Also another lady character and a wedding. Requires about one hour and fifteen minutes. L4 LIBRARY OF CONGRESS ■MP 016 103 372 8 m