V9- <2^^ . '-^o^ 4 o • ^v 0- * -.0 '^^ o <{5°^ % ""^ ,\^ "^-^ '■' ,f^ W<* .<^^ \ 'J^^^.* ^ '^^ "^ -: ■^' ^ .0 .^^ The Girl and The Pennant A BASE-BALL COMEDY IN THREE ACTS BY RIDA JOHNSON YOUNG CoPYBiGHT, 1917, By Samuel Fbench ALL RIGHTS RESERVED CAUTION: Professionals and amateurs are hereby warned that " THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT ", being fully protected under the copyright laws of the United States, is subject to a royalty, and anyone presenting the play without the consent of the owner or his authorized agents will be liable to the penalties by law provided. Applica- tion for amateur acting rights must be made to Samuel French, 28-30 West 38th Street, New York. Application for the professional acting rights must be made to the American Play Company, 33 West 42nd Street, New York. New Yobk SAMUEL FRENCH PUBLISHER 28-30 West 38th STREET LONDOIT SAMUEL FRENCH, Ltd. 26 Southampton Stbekt STRAND Especial notice should be taken that the possession of this book without a valid contract for production first having been obtained from the publisher, confejs no right or license to professionals or amateurs to produce the piay publicly or in private for gain or charity. In its present form this plf-y is dedicated to the reading public only, and no performance of it may be given, except by special arrangement vrith Samuel French. SECTION 28. — That any person v/ho wilfully or for profit shall infringe any copyright secured by this act, or who shall knovv^ingly ajid v/ilfuliy aid or abet such infringment, shall be deemed guilty of a misdemeanor, and upon conviction thereof shall be punished by im- prisonment for not exceeding one year, or by a fine of not less than one hundred dollars nor more than one thousand dollars, or both, in the discretion of the court. Act of March 4, 1909. •CI.D 48298 NOV 12 1917 TPcE GIRL AND THE PENNANT CAST Copley Reeves Punch Reeves. .His brother, and star pitcher on the " Eagles " Henry Weeland. . . .Own^r of a rival team, the " Hornets " John Bohannan Manager of the "Eagles" Skeets Marvin A third base-man Pitman An old pitcher Chief Wayne An Indian catcher Sam The trainer McCracken A player Al Warren A reporter MoNA Fitzgerald Otvner of the " Eagles " Alice Tilton Miss Squibbs 3 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT Produced by Selwyn & Company, at The Lyric Theater, New York, October 23, 1913 ORIGINAL CAST Copley Reeves William Coiirtcnay Punch Reeves Calvin Thomas Henry Welland Malcolm Williams John Bohannan Tiilly Marshall Skeets Marvin William Roselle Pitman Wallace Ozven Chief Wayne Louis Morrell Sam George W. Day McCracken T. Morse Koiipal Al Warren Ralph Morgan A Colored " Fan " Jack Johnson, Jr. Tom MacNish Walter A. Mnlvihill Joe Allen Robert Bott Tim Murphy Edgar Hill Josh Biggers Harry D. Southard Harry Doyle James Reed Cy Dobb Jack Gilchrist Fred Terkle Charles Sievert Hans Flagner Tim Collins Otto Knafe Arthur Moore Cosy Jolan Martin Roitiller Mona Fitzgerald Florence Reed Alice Tilton Lola Fisher Miss Squibbs Marion Ballon Florence Ethel Stannard Maid Florence Deshon Jewel Brite Mildred James Elizabeth Donnell Kathe Quanz Girl friends of Mona: The Girl and The Pennant ACT I Scene: Training Grounds of The Eagles of the National Base-Ball League, in Sligo, Texas. At extreme hack of the stage is a high board fence running across stage. The fence is old, and, in one place, near center, some boards have been taken out and members of the team, nezvs- paper men and friends, have made this a con- venient luay of entering. Along the fence there are nails at irregular intervals and on these the men hang their Makinaivs, szveaters, etc. About five feet from the fence, facing the audience, is a bench. At one end of bench is a large tin ivater-cooler. Beyond this tvater- cooler to the r. is a rude pine table with a bench back of if for newspaper men and plwtog- raphers. At l. of players' bench is a large trunk. Stage vacant ivhen curtain rises. One hears someone whistling outside fence, and in a mo- ment Sam, the negro trainer, comes through fence. Sam. (Singing) "All aboard! All aboard! All aboard for Alabam!" (He makes a double shuffle across stage, going over to trunk, and un- locks it. Whistles as he takes out masks, bats, sweaters, etc. Each time he takes out a bat he gives it a twirl at imaginary ball. He places a number of spiked shoes in front of bench) 5 6 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT (Al Warren, a young nezvspaper man, appears at fence opening. He is quite young and ahvays hustling. Doesn't zvant any item of nezvs to get by him. Ahvays sleutJiing about for tips.) Warren. Good morning, Sam. Sam. Yas, sah ! It is a good mornin', but I got a feelin' you'se going to spile it. Warren. Spoil it? How's that? Sam. Well, Mistah Warren, sah, whenever you comes a early-birdin' aroun' dis yere Park, I cer- tainly does git that early wurrm feelin'. Warren. Bright and early 's my middle name. Sam. Ha! Ha! Bright and Early. Dat's sure so. I been in base-ball ten or nine years now. and I never seen no repotah but you show up on de groun's befo' de team. You certainly is undefatible. Warren. Couldn't miss my little morning gab- fest with you, Sam. Sam. Now you jes' keep away from me, man. I'm going ter keep my mouf shet. Look what you done to me las' week ! Warren. I ? Sam. You go and wurrms it out of me dat Bohannan's dissipinted in the new Souf Paw, and den you prints it in de papah dat he's done gone give ten thousan' dollars f er a lemon ! Warren, Oh, I could see that myself. T wasn't what you said. Why, McCracken's got a streak of yellow wide as the Mississippi. Sam. Sure he is, but you ain't got to blatt it out, is you? Warren. The public's got a right to know. Sam. De public ain't got no right to know niiffin'. Every team's a winner in de papahs befo' de season opens. Who's goin' ter root fer a team what's knocked by it's own home sheet ? You'se got a lot to learn. THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 7 Warren. Well, here's where I'm learnmg it. You know base-ball from Pop Anson to John McGraw. Sam. (Griiuiing) I does dat. Warren. Between you and me, Sam, don't you think W^ayne's gone off some? Sam. 'Tween you and me and de newspapahs ! Go long now, man, I ain't goin' ter talk to you. I'se got my work to do. (Sings) All aboard! All aboard for Alabam ! Warren. I guess Bohannan don't cotton much to this idea of a woman owner. Sam. Cotton to it! Why, he's so sore, you can't tech him. Leastways, T reckon he's sore — I dunno. You lemme alone. Warren. They say he's got a grouch on all women since his wife ran off with Biff Forbes. Sam. Dey say right den. Mr. Bohannan ain't got no use for no woman, nohow, and as for working for a lady owner, it's jes' got him itchy all over! But I ain't got nuffm' to say about it, not a word ! Warren. Miss Fitzgerald's coming down to day. Sam. What, de lady owner? LTm-hm ! Reckon dat's what dat ar private car's doing down here. Warren. {Starting up) Private car? Where? Sam. Why, ain't you see it? Must a come in some time las' night. Side-tracked down by de freight yard. Warren. That's funny — I didn't notice it ! So long. (Makes a hasty exit through fence) Sam. Well, thank de Lord for dat ar private car ! Ice-man. (At fence) Ice! (He dumps piece of ice in through fence. To Sam) Hi, feller! Game this afternoon? Sam. I heard tell the regulers was goin' to play the recruits for some hospital or sompin'. IcE-i\iAN. Look-a yere. The ice won't cost you nothin' if I don't have to come in bv the rate. 8 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT Sam. Well, you jes' linger 'long by de fence 'bout three o'clock, and I'll see what I kin do. Ice-man. All righty, I'm on. {He disappears from fence) Sam. (Takes out note-book and zvrites) Ice. Ten cents. (Takes a tin box of change from trunk and, taking ten cents from it, puts it in his pocket. As he does so, Bohannan the manager enters from field) (Bohannan is a thick-set man of about forty-five. Hair slightly gray. Very autocratic.) Bohannan. Sam? Sam. (Starting and almost upsetting the cash box) Eh? Oh, yes, Mistah Bohannan, sah. BoHANNAH. You're down pretty early. Sam. Bright and early 's my middle name. Bohannan. What's the matter with you, trying to get fresh ? Sam. Fresh? I thought that was a very comical sayin'. Bohannan. I want you to hike back to the hotel. Tell Forbes, the photographer, I want some pictures taken — Regulars, recruits, all of 'em in a group, in front of the hotel. Understand? Sam. Yes, sah. Bohani-jan. I don't want the team here until half -past ten. Sam. (Surprised) Not till haf pas'? Bohannan. Not till half-past ten, you heard me ! Tell the Captain that, and don't give him any further information, you understand? Sam. Yes, sah, I won't tell him you all wants de Park to yo'self. Bohannan. Who said I wanted the Park to my- self? Sam. You ain't said it — (He goes toward fence) THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 9 But what is you going to do here, Mr. Bohannan? BoHANNAN. I'm going to tie a tin can to you in a minute. Sam. No you ain't, sah. {He chuckles and slips hastily through fence. In a moment Sam pokes his head in again through fence) I reckon de gemmem you's waiting" fer, is comin' up de track now. He's a large, stout (BoiiANNAN picks up a hall and fires it at Sam's head. Sam ducks and disappears. Bohannan takes off his heavy makinaw. Hangs it on fence. Goes to r. as Henry Welland appears at opening in fence. Welland is a large, stout, jovial-looking man of about fifty. His face shines with seeming good-zvill to everybody. Good humor absolutely unshakable. He hasn't a scruple in the zvorld and hasn't much respect for any one ivho has. He believes in getting the best out of life, no matter by zvhat method. Looks something like Taft. He is the owner of a rival team, " The Hornets ".) Bohannan. Ah ! There you are, Welland. Welland. Yah, here I am. Bohannan. Come in. Welland. {Coming in through fence sidewise) This hole wasn't made for a fat man. Bohannan. How are you? {They shake hands) Welland. Just able to sit up and take nourish- ment after two nights on the T. and G. M. Bohannan. Awful trip from New York. Welland. Any trip is awful that's more than three miles from Broadway and 42nd Street. Bohannan. {Going over to press table with him) Sit down. {They both sit) Welland. {Mopping his brow) Phew ! Some hike up that railroad track. Why didn't you come 10 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT to my car? Nifty, little breakfast waiting for you! Got the finest cook ! You missed it. BoHANNAN. I didn't think it advisable! Welland. Maybe not! Maybe not! {Taking cigar from Jiis pocket) Cigar? BoHANNAN. Thanks. I don't smoke. Welland. Don't, eh? I never let any of the good things of life get by me ! Dollar per, these. Made for me personally. (He lights cigar looking at BoHANNAN out of the side of his eyes as he does so. BoHANNAN is evidently on his guard, and deter- mined not to open the conversation) Welland. Well? BOHANNAN, Well? Welland. Been thinking things over? BoHANNAN. What things? Welland. Oh, look here, Bohannan. You don't mean to tell me that you haven't been laying avi^ake nights thinking over my proposition. Bohannan. I told you pretty plainly in New York that I couldn't consider it. Welland. Yes, I know. Ha ! ha ! You turned me down so flat I had to go out edgewise. Bohannan. Well Welland. Well, I had a hunch you'd be in a different frame of mind now, and I always follow my hunches. It's no secret up there that you're not singing any serenades under the window of the lady that owns the club. (He laughs) Bohannan. Hm! I suppose it's a fine laugh on me, but it's a pretty damned unpleasant situation ! That woman's been butting in from the day her uncle died and left her the club. Welland. Ha, ha, too bad ! Got your goat, eh ? Bohannan. Yes, and I'm going to make it my business to find out where she keeps hers. Welland. You can't get a v/oman's goat. If you got it, she'd swear it was somebody else's. I THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT ii thought you tolJ me you were going to get her to sell out. BoHANNAN. Sell out ! She's sticking to it like a porous plaster ! Talks a lot of sentimental slush about her uncle. " Wants to keep the name of Fitzgerald in base-ball." Rot ! Welland. I hear Mike Freeman wanted to break into the game? BoHANNAN. He did. He does yet. Why, if I could get this Club for Freeman Fd be on easy street for the rest of my life. Part owner, that's good enough, isn't it? Think of a chance like that and a v/oman putting a crimp in it ! Welland. There's more roads than one, to easy street. BoHANNAN. Fve always gone straight. \'\^ELLAND. So have I : Straight to what I want ! You're not in this for your health, are you? Base- ball ain't just a game now-a-days, it's a business. BoHANNAN. It's a clean business. Welland. (Condescendingly) It has been — it has been. I don't deny that — but things are com- mencing to look up since I broke into the game. Ha, ha ! When I bought the Hornets, I didn't buy 'em for the gate receipts. I don't mind telling you that I'm looking for big money. Between you and me, if my club wins the pennant this year it'll mean a cool half million clean-up on the side. Why Wall Street and me are two-stepping together, like Harry Pilcer and Gaby Deslys. BOHANNAN. Hm ! Welland. And the man that plays the right tune for us to dance can name his own figure! Bohannan. You talk as if it were an easy thing to do. Welland. No I don't. If I thought that, I w^ouldn't talk big money. Bohannan. The Eagles are in a better condition 12 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT than they ever were. Far and awa)' the best club in the League. Welland. I don't know about that, but it's a cinch that either the Eagles or my team will grab the pennant. BoHANNAN. You Can't count on a thing like that. We may both be tail-enders before the season ends. Welland. Well, that's my trouble. I'm willing to take chances. All I ask you to do is to lay back at the end of the season, if necessary, and give me a chance to get in on the World Series. Bohannan. Everybody'd be on. I tell you, you can't double-cross in base-ball. Your own team would be wise in a minute. Welland. The players ! Well, what have they got to do about anything F Bohannan. How about the fans? You can't monkey with the public. Welland. I've never made money any other way. The public's always sitting around with its eyes stuck out, begging you to pull the wool over 'em. Ha, ha, that woman's got you nervous. Bohannan. Nothing of the kind. Welland. Look here. I've been looking into your affairs. Bohannan. It'd be a better idea to attend to your own. Welland. I think I can make them identical. I know to a penny just how much you were in the hole when your wife cut oflf with Forbes. Bohannan. (Starting up) Look here, Welland. I allow no man Welland. Aw. I'm your friend. You ought to understand that. Why, I can put you next to a real estate deal in New York that'll double your money in six months. Bohannan. I haven't any money to double. Welland. That's where I come in. If we can THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 13 come to terms, I'll give you a check to-day for twenty-five thousand. You can take my tip, put it in United Realty and I'll add to your winning a third of the gate receipts of the world series. That's mean and stingy, eh? Why, you'd be on your feet, an independent man at the end of the season. BoHANNAN. No, not that way. Freeman will square my debts if I can get Miss Fitzgerald to sell the club to him. I'm going to give her another chance to-day. Welland. If she's anything like old Fitz, she'll stick. If she does? — If she won't sell? (Rising) If she won't sell, you send me a little message to my private car and my oft'er'll hold good. Boiiannan. You shouldn't have come down here. Newspaper men all over the place. Welland. Oh, I fixed that all right. The crew has my instructions. I'm supposed to be a Mr. Wise, the spendthrift millionaire on a pleasure trip South. Pleasure? There ain't any, south of Herald Square ! (He moves toward fence) BoHANNAN. If — I send Sam the trainer — to your car by one o'clock with — say, a brace of partridges — you'll — you'll know that Miss Fitz- gerald won't sell. Welland. And it'll mean you're with me? BoHANNAN. I don't know — I'll decide. I'll see. Welland. You'd better tie to me, Bohannan, I never double-crossed a pal. Whenever I make a proposition, no matter how crooked it is, it's straight. Bohannan. Better go out by the gate. Welland. Right oh! (They walk tozvard l.) I'll expect to hear from you by one o'clock. And believe me, I'll enjoy those partridges ! Bohannan. You'll find the gate open. If I don't see you before, I will in New York. (They shake hands) 14 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT Welland. Sure. Any day — one o'clock. Corner table at Rector's. {He goes off left) (Sam has entered, unperceived by them, on Wel- land's speech about the partridge. He looks after Welland, his jaiv dropping. He then slips out again through fence. Boiiannan turns and goes toward press table. Sam re- enters at fence.) BoHANNAN. Well, you got back pretty quick. Sam. Yas, sah. Done run all de way. Photo- graphers is took and de team is coming up de track now. BoHANNAN. You're all right, Sam. Here's five dollars. Buy yourself an automobile. Sam. Ha! Ha! I reckon a second-han' motor cycle'll do me ! (Bohannan goes off l. Sam looks at money for a moment. Looks after Bohannan, shakes his head, and then philosophically puts money in pocket. Copley Reeves enters at fence. Copley Reeves is a young man of about tiventy-eight. He is a college man and is in base-ball mainly to look after his brother " Punch ", who is the star pitcher of the Eagles, and rather ivild. Cop has a certain dry humor and plenty of assurance when with the men, but is rather bashful zvith women) Mornin', Mr. Cop. Cop. Hi, Sam. (Cop goes over to bench, throw- ing off his mackinaw, takes off shoes and puts on spikes) (Warren, the newspaper man; enters zvith another older man. Older man goes to press table. Warren comes dozvn to Copley.) Warren. Say, Cop, do you know anything about a Mr. Wise — William Wise ? THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 15 Cop. Willie Wise. Lots of 'em in the world, which one? W^VRREN. That's what I want to know. Tvlust be some big gun. Cop. Big gun, eh? Judging by report? Warren. Naw ! Judging by appearances. Why, he's got a fussy private car down there by the freight yard that looks like a Belasco production. Cop. Hm ! That must be the car I heard rehears- ing under my windov/ all night. Warren. I couldn't find out a thing about him. He's got a set of muzzled niggers on the train. Couldn't open their mouths with a monkey-wrench. Cop. Why didn't you try a watermelon? Warren. Oh, rotten! {He goes over to press table as players begin to pile in through fence. Some hang their coats up on nails, others throzv them across bench. Skeets ]\La.rvin is heard outside) Skeets Marvin. (Outside, singing) \'\^ay dovvm South in the fields of cotton, Sunday closed and hotels rotten ! Look away, look away, look away, Dixie land. (Skeets enters through fence. Skeets is an agile little third-baseman. He is a continual " josher", fond of practical jokes, likely to break into song on all occasions. Skeets striking an attitude in front of press table) Gentlemen of the Press, you see before you the great Skeets Marvin ! First in the field, first to his meals, first in the heart of his manager. Rah! Rah! Rah! Marvin! (Claps his hands, bows right and left) " I thank you, my father thanks you, v.^e all thank you, we all thank you ! " (Goes over to bench, pulls off shoes and puts on spikes. Speaking to photographer zvho has just come in) Photographer, you may now take a snap- shot of the great Skeets Marvin putting on his spikes. It will please the ladies. 1 6 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT Cop. How do you do it, Skeets, so early in the morning ? Skeets. Natural vivacity! Natural flow of spirits. I'm tliat sweet-tempered when I get up in the morning! (Several other fellows come fhrougJi fence. Hang up coats. Pitt on spikes. Others go to trunk, get bats, balls, etc., from Sam. As they come in some of them nod to nezvspaper men. All go about their business zvithoiit much zvaste of zvords. Enter Chief Wayne, an Indian. Skeets rising) Gentlemen of the Press! Allow me to in- troduce Chief Wayne. His first time in vaudeville. This great catcher will now deliver you a monologue entitled, " How I split my finger-nails, and why." Wayne. (Coming dozvn) Much chance anybody has for a monologue when you're around ! Skeets. Oh, naughty ! naughty ! A grouch ! And you're to be queen of the May! (Pitman, an old pitcher zvho has seen his best days and zvho has come in zvith a crozvd of other men, comes dozvn to bench. Pitman is the old style of ball player. Not educated. A typical long, lank countryman zvho knozvs nothing else but base-ball.) Pitman. (To men) They do say that Skeets winds his mouth up every night and it goes all day. Skeets. Gentlemen of the Press ! Gaze upon this historic specimen. Pitman, who pitched the last ball to Noah as he entered the ark. Cop. (Protesting) Can that, Skeets ! Pitman. Oh, don't mind me — I know I'm a has- been. (He turns azvay and goes up to Sam) Skeets. Where's your baby, Cop? Cop. You're the only infant I see about here. Skeets. What sparkling repartee ! Did you get Punch out of bed ? THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 17 Cop. Only three times. I didn't have time to really wake him. (Enter McCracken, a nczv pitcher, for zvhom BoHANNAN has jitst paid ten thousand dollars. He is very conceited — continually posing.) Forbes. (The photographer goes over to Mc- Cracken) Just one pose, Mr. McCracken — alone. Skeets. Make him pretty, Forbes. He cost ten thousand dollars ! Ten thousand dollars ! Put a golden halo round his head. (As McCracken is posing in a very self-satisfied manner for Forbes, Bohannan re-enters from L.) Boiiannan. Pitman. Pitman. Yes, sir. Bohannan. Take the recruits to the field. Pitman. Yes, sir. (He goes off left, followed by the new men) Bohannan. Come now. What's the matter? Get to work. Hall, Warren, McGee. Round the park three times. Skeets, a little less comedy wouldn't do you any harm. McCracken. McCracken. Yes, sir. Bohannan. Hand-ball. Don't put anything in it. McCracken. No, sir. Bohannan. Cop. Cop. Yes, sir. Bohannan. Where's Punch? Cop. He's coming. He'll be along presently. (Bohannan goes off l. Copley, Skeets and two other men, start to " zvarm up " by lining up r. and throzving to Wayne, zvho catches l.) i8 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT Skeets. {Throiuing) A little teaser! Wayne. Just as easy ! ( They throiv for a mo- iiient, zvhen Punch Reeves enters through fence. Punch is the star pitcher of the Eagles. A very handsome fellow of about tzventy-ftvc) Fellows. Hi, Punch ! PuNCPi. (Rather grouchily, as he comes dozvn to bench) Hello ! Skeets. Late again ! Wait till Bohannan sees you. He is in a dandy humor this A. M. Punch. So am L (They keep throzving ball all through conversation) Skeets. (Sings) Oh, way down South in the fields of cotton, Sundays closed and hotels rotten ! Punch. (From bench) Aw, cut the concert, Skeets. You give me a headache. Skeets. I give you a headache. Come again. Little Skeetsy is wise to where you got that head. Cop. You ought to be: you were there when he got it. Skeets. All right, Cop. I'll be good. I won't tease your little brother. Wayne. (The Indian, receiving a particularly hot ball from one of the men) What are you trying to do? (Takes off his glove and examines his finger) Cop. Hurt you? (He goes over to Wayne) Wayne. Hurt! Another nail split! Hell! (Throzi's his mitt dozvn and goes over to bench, nurs- ing his finger) Skeets. (Singing at Wayne) Baby, baby, that is the name I love. Sweet as the voice of an angel, soft as the coo of a dove! THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 19 Wayne. (Starting tozvard Skk.ets, ivho hops he- hind- other fellozvs to keep out of his way) Baby, am I? I'll show you. I've got to wash your face for that. {There is a general good-natured rough-house. Wayne gets hold of Skeets, the other fellozvs assisting and laughing. They lift him and duck his head in zvater-hucket beneath the cooler. Re-enter Bohannan.) BoHANNAN. Here! Here! What's all this? {Fellozvs stand grinning as Bohannan faces them. Skeets spluttering the zvater from his mouth and rubbing his zvet hair) You act like a lot of Rah- rahs ! Go on and get some batting practice, Wawye. (Wayne takes a bat from Sam and goes off l. grinning. ) Bohannan. Punch! Punch. Yes, sir? Bohannan. Late again to-day. What's the mat- ter? Punch. Well, I can't wake myself. Bohannan. It'll cost you twenty-five dollars the next time ! What's the matter with you, Cop ? I told you to see that your brother got here. Cop. Why, I — er Bohannan. You might do that much. Three times around the Park, Punch. {To men on bench) Here, you beach-combers. Get busy. What are you waiting for? A snap-shot? {Men get up from bench and go off l. follozved by Bohannan. Punch strips off his szveater and starts running off r. Cop and Skeets left on stage.) 20 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT Skeets. Gee! he's got a grouch, all right. (To Cop) Why didn't you tell him you pulled Punch out of bed three times this morning? Cop. Aw ! what's the use ? Want to catch ? Skeets. No! Fm tired. {Throivs glove dozvn and goes over to bench) Cop. Aw, come on. {He throzvs hall several times in the air, catching it) Skeets. What you trying to do? Get the kink out of your arm? Cop. Nothing like that. It's an ingrowing kink, so they tell me. Skeets. Oh, I don't know. If your brother wasn't a star pitcher and high roller, you might have a chance. But you're snowed under. Dead cold. Cop. Well, why didn't you give me a chance to " warm up ? " Skeets. Gee, if I'd inherited a barrel of money like you ! Cop. I suppose you'd have started in to " whoop " it up, eh? Skeets. I would that. I wouldn't stick in base- ball. Only exercise I'd take would be cutting coupons. Cop. I like base-ball. Skeets. Rodents ! You stay in to chaperone Punch. No one else is on to it, but little Skeetsy is the wise boy. Cop. He thinks he is. Skeets. Yeh, and I know where all your loose change goes too. Gee, I wouldn't stand for the fellows thinking me a tight-wad, just to give Punch a chance to lose at poker every night. Cop. Say, do you know you're going to get your nose hurt some time, sticking it into other people's business ! Skeets. Well it's my nose. THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 21 (Some men come in from field, get coats, wrap them about them, others go to zvater-cooler. Some sit on bench. Punch Reeves runs in panting and blowing from his run about the Park. Cop jumps up, gets Punch's coat and helps him into it.) Punch. Ugh! Skeets. That's right, Cop. Wrap the baby up and give him his rattle and bottle. Punch. PIl rattle and bottle you when I get my breath. Gee! Fm all in. {Sits on ground) Skeets. You don't look pretty, Punch. You do not look pretty. Suppose the Lady Magness should show up and see the only hero sitting on the ground — puffing like a swine and his nose ornamented with a map of Texas ! Punch Why? Is she here? Skeets. Due to-day. I had it from the clerk. She's engaged the only suite in the Ptomaine Palace v/ith a bath. Some class to that, eh? Punch. Hand me a drink, will you, Cop? You're up. (Cop goes over to cooler and fills the cup, hand- ing it to Punch) I know Miss Fitzgerald. At least I used to. Lived next door to us in Albany. She v/as sweet on Cop then. Cop. Nothing of the kind ! Skeets. {To Cop) Well, you bally old oyster, why didn't you say so? What's she like? Punch. She v*-as all bones and legs, far as I remember. Not much of a looker. Cop. She had good eyes. Irish, you know. Skeets. {Singing) " When Irish eyes are smiling, sure 'twas like a day in June " ! Go on— Green eyes, bones and legs. What else? 22 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT Punch. It's been some years since we lived in Albany. Skeets. Some years ! Gee. An old maid. I'll bet she's strong on suffrage. Punch. If there's anything gets my goat, it is one of these iron-board business women. Skeets. Sure, you like the kind that falls for your manly be-au-ty, in a shower of pink notes ! Pitman. I hear from Bohannan she's a regular rarer ! It'll put the kibosh on the club all right. (Pitman is up l. by trunk, stripped to under-shirt. Sam is rubbing his arm zvifh liniment) Sam. (Who has been listening to conversation) You can't put no kibosh on dis yere club. Dey ain't no Jinx kin put a crimp in de Eagles now. We's a-going up — a-going up Skeets. Sporting goods on the fifth floor — all out! (Sound of automobile tooting outside fence. It toots persistently.) Punch. Somebody out there wants something. Skeets. (Running to fence) It's a bunch of skirts in a big yellow touring car. It's the Magness. I feel it in my bones it's the Magness. (He comes dozvn ) Sam. Dey 're gettin' out. One of 'em is. (McCracken, the new pitcher, gets up and strikes an effective pose. Punch begins to smooth his hair. All look tozvard fence expectantly. Miss Squibbs, Miss Fitzgerald's secretary ap- pears at opening in fence. She is a woman of about forty. Very prim and precise. She is a mental scientist and ivears an eternal smile.) Miss Squibbs. Are these the base-ball grounds? Sam. Yes'm. THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 23 INIiss Squibbs. I want to see Mr. John Bohannan. We knocked at the gate, but nobody answered. Skeets. (Aside) Oh, so sorry. The butler is out to-day ! Cop. (Going forivard) I'll call Mr. Bohannan, Miss I\Itss Squibbs. Please tell him that Miss Fitz- gerald is here. (Fcllotcs look at each other in dismay.) Cop. I'll tell him. Won't you — won't you come in ? ]Miss Squibbs. I prefer to wait here. (Cop leaves her and goes off l.) Skeets. (Under his breath) Lord! Oh, Lord ! Owned body and soul, and by that ! (McCracken and Punch relinquish attitudes.) Pitman. It's a Chessy cat ! Did you cop the (MoNA Fitzgerald appears back of Miss Squibbs, at fence. She is a very pretty, very young girl with a decidedly smart air and manner. Tlie men have their backs turned to fence and do not see her zvhen she first appears.) MoNA. What's the matter, Miss Squibbs? Can't we go in? (Fellon's all turn at sound of her voice and zvhen they see her all, spring suddenly to atten- tion. To men) We may come in, mayn't we? All. Sure ! MoNA. Come in, Alice ! It's all right. (She steps through opening, follozvcd by another pretty girl, 24 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT Alice Tilford, a Southern girl zvith a decided accent mid very gushing. Mona is very feminine — not a managing type at all, and rather frightened at the responsibility of oivning the club) I'm Miss Fitzgerald. I want to see the — my manager. Punch. {Going forzvard) My brother has gone for him. I suppose you don't remember me. I'm Reeves. Mona. Sure, I remember you. You used to bully me awfully in Albany, and besides, I've seen you often at the games. This is Mr. Reeves, Miss Til- ford. Alice. {Gushing) Oh, are you Punch Reeves? I've just been dyin' to meet you. I'm crazy about base-ball. Skeets. {To men) Look at him, hogging it all. Mona. Come in, Miss Squibbs. It's all right. Miss Squibbs. {Looking at high hoard over which she must step) I — er — if the gentlemen will please turn their heads. Mona. Oh, don't be silly, Squibbsy! (Miss Squibbs steps gingerly over board, displaying a generous amount of stocking. She looks about resolutely cheerful, but not liking it.) Miss Squibbs. {To Mona) Do you think we ought? — All these men — and — {She sees Pitman in under-shirt, hastily trying to slip into sweater) Ugh! {Enter Cop with Bohannan.) Mona. Ah, Mr. Bohannan. You see, I came, in spite of your warnings. Bohannan. I'm very glad indeed to see you, Miss Fitzgerald. MoNA. Well, I shouldn't have thought so from your letter. Bohannan. Well, you see, I thought of the long THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 25 journey — poor accommodations and all that. I ad- vised you to stay in New York because Sligo, Texas, is rather primitive. MoNA. Oh, it isn't Sligo I came to see. I wanted to see the team. Isn't this Copley Reeves? Cop. I — v/hy — I — yes MoNA. Don't you remember me? Cop. I used to — That is, I mean, you're not so young" as you were ! MoNA. {Laughing) Oh! How ungallant! {Turning from Jiim) I want to meet all the men, Mr. Bohannan. Alice. {Has cornered Punch and is talking to him enthusiastically, looking eagerly up into his face) Yes, I've got your picture on my dressing table — I go to all the games. I just love base-ball. MoNA. {Taking Bohannan over to Miss Squibbs) Mr. Bohannan, Miss Squibbs, my sec- etary. Alice — Alice — I want you to meet Mr. Bohannan, the manager. Alice. {Releases Punch, zvhom she has talked up into a cornier, and comes over to Mona and Bohannan) Oh, I declare, I'm so excited. How do you do, Mr. Bresnahan? Bohannan. Bohannan ! Alice. Oh, yes, Bohannan. I'll remember that. Sounds like banana. I've seen your picture so often in the papers. I was dyin' to meet you. I know you can explain so many little things I don't under- stand about base-ball. (Alice corners Bohannan, and Punch making a ivide detour around her, comes doivn to Mona) Punch. I think Bohannan will be busy for the next few minutes. Would you like to meet the other men? You know my brother, of course — Mona. {Smiling) I knew a Copley Reeves once, but he doesn't seem to know whether he's the same one. 26 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT Cop. Oh, yes, I'm the one. It's you — I didn't know. You see, you wore short skirts — If you'd worn short skirts to-day, I'd have recognized your — Punch. Hm ! Cop. Your short skirts. Punch. {Steering Mona azvay from Cop and over to Wayne. Cop kicks himself) This is Wayne. Chief Wayne. Mona. How do you do? Skeets. (Trying to attract Punch's attention to himself) Hm!" Punch. (Ignoring Skeets) This is Pitman. ]\IoNA. Oh, Mr. Pitman, I am so glad to know you. My Uncle thought so much of you. Miss Squibbs, come here. I v.'ant to introduce Mr. Pit- man. You've heard Uncle Ned speak of him so often. Miss Squibbs. Oh, yes. The old one. Mona. Old nonsense. Pitman. That's all right, ma'am. My wing ain't dead yet. Mona. Dead ! I'm counting on that arm to help me win the pennant. Skeets. (Pulling Punch's sleeve) Hm ! (While these introductions are going on, Alice is gradually talking Bohannan up against the fence.) Punch. The rest of the regulars are out on the field. Shall I take you over? Mona. I'd love to — if it won't interrupt them. You see, I want to know every one personally. I believe in the personal element in business. Punch. (Looking dozvn at her, evidently very much impressed) So do I. (He goes off zuiih Mona tozvard l.) Skeets. Well, the low-down sun-of-a-gun ! Ain't THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 27 I a regular ? What's the matter with him ? (He fol- lows them off) Alice. {To Boiiannan) Oh, look! Where's Mona going? To the horseshoe? Do take me, Mr. Bobannan. I want to stand on the horseshoe. BopiANNAN. The horseshoe? Alice. Well, the grid-iron. W^hatever they call it. Boiiannan. You mean the diamond. Alice. Oh, yes. Do come and explain it all to me. I'm so interested. I do love base-ball. {She hustles Bohannan off l., although he is evidently reluctant. Men are doubled up zvith laughter) Wasren. Oh ! Oh ! Did you see Bohannan's face? Come on, fellows, I want to be in on the murder ! Oh, I do loi'e base-ball. (Everybody goes off left except Miss Squibbs, Cop and Sam. Miss Squibbs hesitates, looks about as though frightened.) Cop. Would you like to go over ? May I ? Miss Squibbs. I — I don't know you, sir. Cop. No — that's why I thought you might take a chance! (She hastens off after others) (Cop stajids looking after her, then goes over to bench, sits and begins idly digging at the turf zvith a bat he has picked up.) Sam. She done give you the turn-down, Mr. Cop, Cop. She did that, Sam. Sam. You all's too serious. You ought to get busy — Mix up ! Mix up ! Cop. I'm afraid I'm not much of a mixer. Sam. I say, Mr. Cop, do you think Mr. Bohannan's considerin' any exchange with the Hor- nets. 28 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT Cop. Well, he might be willing to exchange me for two bats and a used ball, but I don't think he'd let anybody else go. Why? Sam. We all had a visitor dis mornin' to de Park, and I jes' cain't reason it out. Is you ever seen Henry Welland, de owner of de Hornets? Cop. Sure. Sam. Ain't he a large round circular faced fel- low, sproutin' cracked ice and always a laughin'? Cop. That's Welland, you've got him. Sam. Yes I — I got him. Cop. Where'd you see him? Sam. Why, I (Punch comes running hi, excitedly.) Punch. Oh, Cop — Cop Cop. Here I am. What's the matter? Punch. I've got to have some money. Cop. Oh, I thought you were bringing me some news. Punch. Well, of course, if I'm drawing too heavily Cop. Nobody could accuse you of that. Punch. You've got a very light touch. What's the matter? Couldn't you cash in last night ? Punch. Oh, no. I didn't lose much; but I'm cleaned out and I've just invited the ladies to go out to Skelton's for a chicken and wafifle supper. Cop. Quick action, my son, quick action. Punch. Well, she said she couldn't eat in the hotel, so it was up to me — naturally. And now it's up to you. Cop. Naturally. Punch. Oh, hang it. Cop. I thought you meant it when you said I'd share your income. Cop. I do mean it. I was only trying in my light and artistic manner to be funny. I don't consider it my income any more than yours. THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 29 Punch. Oh, that's all very well for you to say, but you don't know how it makes a fellow feel to come to you for money, when if it hadn't been for that rotten will Cop. Aw, chuck it. Punch! You know Fd split the principal with you if I could. How much do you want? Punch. Put a hundred to my credit in the office. She's going to stay a couple of days and we've got to do the right thing. Cop. Of course we have. I'll see to it. Punch. That's a good old dub. You needn't think I don't know I spend more than my share, but I'll pay you back some day. (He turns azvay) Say, she's a winner, isn't she? Who'd have thought Mona Fitzgerald would have turned out like that ! I'm going to be little Willie good-boy from now on. You watch me. [He goes toward left and en- counters MoNA and Bohannan) Punch. You're not going? MoNA. Oh, no. Just going to have a little talk with Mr. Bohannan. (Punch exits.) Bohannan. (To Cop, pointing to field) Umpire this for me, will you? Cop. Yes, sir. (Goes off l.) (Mona and Bohannan go over to press table and sit. Miss Squibbs comes fluttering in from field and sits on bench.) MoNA. Mr. Bohannan, I don't know much about business. Bohannan. So I should judge. MoNA. And I'm not used to dealing with men who — who dislike me. (She zvaits a moment for 30 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT BoHANNAN to coutradlct licr, hut he says nothing) I feel that you are displeased about my insisting upon keeping Pitman — but there were certain things my Uncle talked to me about before he died — and — . and I want to follow his wishes as nearly as I can, but I don't want to interfere with you. BoHANNAN. Pitman's dead-wood. It's a mistake keeping him, but so long as you insist, I have noth- ing further to say. AIoNA. I don't want you to feel that way. I want you to understand it's a matter of sentiment. BoHANNAN. Well, I hope you'll enjoy running the team on sentiment. MoNA. Oh, but I shan't enjoy it. I don't enjoy anything about it but the games. I didn't want to own a base-ball club, Air. Bohannan — really BoHANNAN. Look here. Miss Fitzgerald, why don't you take my tip and sell out? This isn't a game for a woman — like you. MoNA. I know, but my Uncle wanted me to keep it. Bohannan. Well, I don't mean to be ugly, but I tell you right now, I've got to be boss of this team or (Pitman, the old pitcher, comes in and sits on bench. Miss Squibbs draws away from him, smiling resolutely. Pitman hypnotised by her smile, keeps looking at her. When he catches her eye, he looks quickly azvay. She keeps mov- ing further and further azvay from him each time. ) Mona. {To Bohannan) You are boss, ab- solutely. That's what I want you to be, but don't you think I should take an intelligent interest in my own club? (They continue to talk in lozv tones) Pitman. {To Miss Squibbs) You needn't move up any further, ma'am. I ain't so fat. THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 31 ivliss Squibbs. I wasn't thinking of you, sir. Pitman. Oh, wasn't you? I thought you was smiling at me. Miss Squibbs. Whenever I find myself in a particularly disagreeable situation, I smile. Pitman. You don't say? What for? Miss Squibbs. It changes my mental attitude. Pitman. Yes'm, I think I get you. Though as a high-brow, I'm rather on the blink. Bohannan. {Angrily. To Mona) No, Miss! No ! Cop Reeves has got to stay. Mona. You never use him. Bohannan. Use him? He's on this team to keep Puiich Reeves sober, if you must know. (They con- verse again in lozv tones) Pitman. (To Miss Squibbs) Look at the youngsters over there, ma'am. That's livin' ! You and me's " has-beens ", ain't we ? Miss Squibbs. Sir ! Pitman. Oh, I meant it complimentary. I guess you put a few over the plate when you was young. Miss Squibbs. Over the plate ! I have absolutely no appetite. Never had. Pitman. You don't understand — that's base-ball for Miss Squibbs. No, sir. I don't understand your base-ball talk and what's more, I don't care to hear it! Pitman. Well, there's one thing I like about you. You don't fan none. Miss Squibbs. Fan! Why should I? I'm not w^arm ! (Pitman, zvith a gesture of despair, gets up, goes over to water cooler and plunging his hands into bucket, bathes Jiis forehead.) Mona. I suppose you're right, Mr. Bohannan, 32 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT and I'm perfectly willing to leave everything in your hands. BoHANNAN. Well, if you take my advice, you'll get out of it entirely. I understand your uncle's estate didn't figure up to much — beyond what he had in the Club ? MoNA. No, there wasn't much else. BoHANNAN. You ought to get your money out and soak it away in some perfectly safe investment. This is a man's job. You can't hold it down. MoNA. But my uncle said I'd have no trouble with you as manager. BoiiANNAN. Well, Fitz and I could work to- gether. Besides, he was a man. If I made mis- takes that cost money, I'd feel rotten, putting a woman in the hole. MoNA. It's awfully kind of you, Mr. Bohannan, and I understand now how you feel about it. (She rises) Bohannan. I've seen some pretty wise guys go broke on this game. Suppose you have a losing year? Suppose your club goes to the bad? Mona. But we'd make money anyway, wouldn't we? Bohannan. Public's mighty fickle. Why, I've seen first-class teams go down so quickly they couldn't do paying business on their own home Park. Now, if you were a man, I'd say, go ahead — let him risk it. Even if you were a very rich woman it would be different — but I can't bear to see a woman up against it. MoNA. I wish you'd talked to me like this be- fore. (They are walking fozvard l.) Bohannan. It's never too late to take a tumble to yourself. You'd better think it over. MoNA. I shall — I'll think it over. Bohannan. Do, but you'll have to act quickly. I'd have to wire Freeman to-day if you're willing THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 33 to sell. Of course, it's nothing to me and I don't want to urge you, but I'm steering you straight I'll see you again in a few moments. (He goes off (MoNA stands looking after him.) Miss Squibbs. If my code of ethics allowed me to distrust any of God's creatures, I'd say I don't trust that man. MoNA. Oh, Squibbsy, I think he means to be kind, but — but he makes me feel that I'm nothing but a female. {She goes over and sits by Miss Squibbs) I hate to be a quitter — but I — I — Oh, Squibbsy— I want to run away — right away — right back home. Miss Squibbs. (Triumphantly) There! You can't say now there's nothing in Mental Science. I've been concentrating en you. I've been sending you " thought waves." I've been willing to throw up this whole unladylike business, you see ! MoNA. Oh, Squibbsy, don't begin Mental Science on me now. I've got troubles enough. Miss Squibbs. You shouldn't have trouble. There is no such thing as trouble. All is peace, joy, harmony : you've only to put yourself in the correct mental attitude. Mona. I haven't any mental attitude. I don't know where I'm at. Miss Squibbs. My dear girl ! Mona. Good grammar M^on't express my feeling. Did you hear how he barked at me when I asked him to let Copley Reeves out? Miss Squibbs. What's the matter with Copley Reeves ? Mona. I can't bear him. You know everybody in Albany says he just honeyed aroimd his father and did Punch out of his share in the will. 34 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT Miss Squibbs. Punch Reeves was the disgrace of the town. He got just \vhat he deserved. {Mes- senger boy at fence) Messenger. Is Miss Mononna Fitzgerald here? IN.IoNA. (Rising) I'm Miss Fitzgerald. What is it? Messenger. Letter for 3'ou. (Comes in and hands her note) MoNA. For me? Messenger. Gentlemen on the private car give me a dallah for bringin' it. Said there wasn't no answer. MoNA. Very v/ell. Messenger. (Calling off to field) Oh, you Eagles ! (Goes out) MoNA. (Opening note) I wonder who the gentleman on the private car can be ? (She reads the note. Appears pusded) Miss Squibbs. Nothing wrong at home? MoNA. No it's — I don't quite understand — Listen, Squibbsy. " Dear Miss Fitzgerald. There will be an effort made to buy you out of the club. Don't agree to it — you have a winning team, and you know your uncle's wishes. You're being advised against your best interests. Keep this quiet, but if you're worthy of the name of Fitzgerald, you'll not be bamboozled, you'll stick. A friend and well wisher." Well, what do you think of that? Miss Squibbs. I think somebody's very officious. MoNA. Squibbsy, this is providential. I feel al- most as if this were a message from my uncle. Miss Squibbs. Mona ! MoNA. It's just what I needed to buck me up! Well, " Mr. Private Car-man ! I don't know who you are, but I'll take your advice. I'll stick and I won't be bulldozed. I won't be dictated to. I won't be Mental Scienced at! I'm going to be my own man! I'll stick! THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 35 Miss Squibbs. Oh, dear ! (A number of men come in from the field, among them, Skeets, dancing attendance on Alice. She has a bat under her arm and carries a ball. She has on Skeet's makinaiv coat.) Alice. (To Chief Wayne) You must put your initials on this ball, Mr. Chief. I'm going to tell all the girls it's the ball you struck out with. I think it's awful clever of you to strike out with this big bat and such a little ball. Skeets. Clever! Clever! Very clever! Alice. It makes it so thrilling. You're being a real Indian. I never knew Indians talked English before. I thought they only grunted. Skeets. You ought to hear him when he splits a finger nail. (All the men have come in by this time. MoNA turns to them) MoNA. Men, I want to say a few words to you, may I ? Men. Sure — Go ahead. Three cheers for Miss Fitzgerald ! (Men give cheers.) Punch. Here, Miss Fitzgerald. On the bench. Up with you. (Punch assists Mona to get on bench) Mona. I know it's not very agreeable to — to any of you that the team should — should be owned by a woman. Men. No. Nothing of the kind. Not at all. Skeets. Delighted. Mona. You're very kind, but — well, you see, I don't like managing women much myself. (All laugh) But the team was left me as a trust. You all knew my uncle. You knew what base-ball meant to him. 36 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT All Men. Yes, yes, we know. Good old Fitz ! (Pitman at the side takes his cap off.) Skeets. He was a king sport, Miss Fitzgerald. MoNA. He was, and he didn't want the name of Fitzgerald to go out of base-ball. He hadn't any boys but me — nephews, I mean. So he trained me. Ever since I was that high Fve been going to the game. Fm not coming to you ignorantly. I know quite a good deal about it. I know every play. I know all your records. Skeets. Ouch ! (All laurjh.) MoNA. Besides Alice. She just loves base-ball ! {All laugh.) MoNA. Yes — I do, I do love it and I admire every — every — {She hesitates) Men. Oh, say it! Say it! MoNA. Well, I do. I admire every man who makes good in this, the cleanest sport in the world. {All cheer) Now, don't make fun of me. This is the first time I ever made a speech. Men. You're doing fine. Go ahead ! Mona. What I want to say is this. Twenty years ago, my uncle had a scrubby little team — bushers — whose chief claim to distinction was beating up umpires. But he loved them. He worked with them. He looked ahead. He saw organized base- ball as it is to-day. He wasn't in it for the money. He played the game for the game's sake. The Eagles crept up and up ; base-ball crept up and up. Big keen business saw it, the little fenced-in lots THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 37 began to disappear and big gorgeous parks sprang into existence, and the Eagles kept pace with all of this. My uncle went from the Bushes to the jMinors, from the Minors to the Big League. He couldn't afford the game, he wasn't a rich man, but he hung on. He wanted to see the Eagles win a pennant. Last year when you finished second, he was ill ; he only wanted to live one year more to see you win out. He knew you'd do it this time ! Oh, men, don't forget him. Go in and win, not for me, not for the Eagles, but for the memory of John Fitzgerald w'hose slogan was " American sport for the Americans, and all for fair play ! Men. We will! Hurrah! Hurrah! (BoHANNAN has coiiic in witJi nczvspaper men at L. and hears end of speech.) BoHANNAN. {To Warren) What do you know about that? Warren. She's got 'em going. BoHANNAN. I'll get her going. She's on her way to New York right now, but she don't know it. MoNA. I guess that's about all I have to say — and — and help me down, please. {Men all rush to help her down. As she comes down-stage she comes face to face zvith Bohannan) BoHANNAN. Perhaps you don't know. Miss Fitz- gerald, that it's against all base-ball precedent to make speeches to the men in the park. MoNA. Oh, no, I didn't. Cop. Perhaps ]\Iiss Fitzgerald doesn't regard precedent. Skeets. Oh, look who's talking right out in meet- ing! Bohannan. As Miss Fitzgerald's manager I don't care to see her make herself ridiculous. {He turns toward press table) 38 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT Alice. (Picking up a mask from ground) OO ! What's this ? Oh, it's what the Empire wears, isn't it? Mr. Bohannan, can I have this? It'll be just lovely filled with ferns. Bohannan. Oh, help yourself — help yourself — Take the Park ! Alice. Oh, thank you. I'm going to tell all the girls that it was the great John Bohannan's muzzle. (Everybody laughs, but Bohannan is furious.) Bohannan. Back to the hotel, all of you ! Re- port a half hour earlier this afternoon. We've got to make up for interruptions this morning. (Men go for coats, etc.) Alice. (To Skeets) You don't mind my keep- ing on your coat, do you, Mr. Skeets ? It's so chilly. Skeets. Not at all. I'll run back. Do me good. Alice. It'll be fine for motoring. Punch. (Coming dozvn to Mona) You won't forget? Five o'clock. I'll call for you. Mona. You're a life-saver. I couldn't eat a dinner in that awful hotel. (To Cop) Are you coming ? Punch. Oh, no, Cop don't care for that sort of thing. Cop. No. I prefer the meats at the Ptomaine Palace. (She goes up tozvard fence with Punch.) Bohannan. Miss Fitzgerald, have you been thinking over that matter I suggested to you ? Mona. (Coming dozvn) Yes, Mr. Bohannan, I've quite decided to respect my uncle's wishes in the matter. I'm going to stay in. Bohannan. Very well. I wish you luck. THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 39 MoNA. Thank you. I know you do. (She puts out her hand and Bohannan shakes it rather shame- facedly. She turns and goes up to fence ivhcre Punch is zvaiting for her, and they exit) (Cop is last on bench, bending to take off spikes.) Bohannan. Sam. Sam. Yes, sah. Bohannan. Tell the chef at the hotel to give you a couple of birds out of my ice-box. (Cop gets up and. goes tozvard fence.) Sam. Yes, sah. Bohannan. Take them at once to the private car you'll see down the track. Leave them for Mr. Wise with my compliments. Sam. Mistah Wise! Mistah Bohannan, dat man what was talking to you here dis mornin' is deceivin' you if he says he's any Mistah Wise. I tell you I kr.ov/ him and Fll eat dis yere bat if dat gemmen on de private car in't Henry Welland, de owner of de Hornets. (Cop pauses at fence, looking back in surprise. Bohannan stands looking at Sam, dumb- founded, as curtain descends.) ACT H Scene: TJie loggia at back of Mona Fitzgerald's hopne on the Hudson. Five months after first act. The loggia is a vine-screened back porch with a pergola over it. At center there is an entrance into the house. TJicre are entrances r. and l. to 40 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT different parts of grounds. The loggia is fur- nished zvitJi summer furniture: wicker chairs, hanging scats, tea tables, gay chints pillozvs, etc. It has the effect of a room. There are a fetv steps dozvn from loggia, and right and left are zvhitc marble benches. {Enter from house, Mona, followed by Sam.) MoNA. It was so good of you, Sam, to come to help us out. Sam. Miss Fitzgerald, I wouldn't a missed seein' the Eagles break into sassiety for nothin' ! MoNA. Oh, it isn't going to be society, Sam, only base-ball people. {She goes to r. and points off) You see that Marquee over there? Sam. Markee? MoNA. That red and white tent. That's where we'll serve the punch and lemonade. That's where you can help. Sam. Sure! Dat's where I kin help, where de punch is. MoNA. You'll find the servants over there now. I told them you were to take charge. Sam. Yes'm. {He goes tozvard r. and turns) Too bad we done lost dat game yestiddy. MoNA. Well, we're still in the lead and two games ahead of the Hornets. Sam. I don't like to git too near dem Hornets. Dey sure am stingers ! MoNA. They'll never touch us, Sam. Sam. I don't know. Miss. Mr. Bohannan, he sure is way down in de dumps — yes's, indeedy ! MoNA. You must hold the thought of victory, Sam. Sam. Yes'm, I'se a holdin' it, but it's sort of wrigglin'. {E.vit Sam r.) Maid. {At door) Mr. Reeves, Miss. THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 41 (Enter Punch.) MoNA. Oh! You just went home! Punch. I know, but — am I too early? MoNA. Not at all. Fm always glad to see you. Punch. Always glad! Morning, noon and night, eh? You see, Pve figured it out that if Fm here all the time, sometime we're going to have a chance to talk alone. MoNA. Must we talk alone? Punch. I must. MoNA. (Laughing) Oh, very well, then, Fll leave you. Punch. Oh, I say — -why won't you ever give me a chance? MoNA. I don't have to, you have a way of taking chances for yourself. (She sits on szvinging seat and he stands in front of her) Punch. I have to: luck and I haven't been on speaking terms for some years. I have to look out for myself. MoNA. Well, isn't that what everyone wants you to do, look out for yourself? Punch. Well, haven't I? I haven't fallen off since you — you asked me not to last Spring down in Texas. MoNA. It's been a long, dry summer, hasn't it? Punch. It's been short. Different from any other summer in my life. I — I never had an in- centive before — to be decent. MoNA. No incentive ! You only have to be — sensible for six months to get your share of your father's money. Punch. Money ! I don't care about money. MoNA. Except spending it ! Punch. Well, why not? If a fellow has it? You wouldn't want me to be like Cop, would you? MoNA. No, I should not want you to be like Cop. 42 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT Punch. Not that Cop isn't all right. In fact, he's been rather generous. MoNA. Generous ! Hni ! Punch. In his way — though, of course, it's awfully humiliating to have to go to him for every- thing. MoNA. Why do 3-ou give him that satisfaction? I'd live on my salary if I were you. Punch. My salary ! Oh, that's all right for some of the fellows, but I get invited around a lot. Have to hold up my end. My position — you under- stand ! MoNA. I think it was a ridiculous will of your father's. How is anyone going to prove that he hasn't taken anything to drink for six months ? Punch. That's where Cop comes in. MoNA. Hm ! Wastes his time in base-ball to spy on you. P'uNCH. Pretty rotten, isn't it ? But I don't want to talk about Cop. MoNA. Neither do I — but I just think of him all the time. Punch. You do, eh? I don't know that I like that. MoNA. Oh, I mean I can't bear him ! Punch. I brought along that photograph of yours. You promised to write something on it. {He takes photograph from pocket) Here's my fountain pen. Mona. I don't know what to say. Punch. Something encouraging. Mona. I don't know that I want to encourage you in that way ! Punch. Mona, don't you care — not — not at all ? Mona. {Writing) Come to me when the six months are over and perhaps Punch. {Taking photograph) I'm not wildly THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 43 enthusiastic about that "perhaps " — but it's some- thing ! MoNA. Punch, you mustn't think — you mustn't feel sure, because — I — Em really not sure myself. Punch. Ell take care of that. Ell make you care ! {He puts photograph in pocket as Alice TiLTON comes out on loggia) Alice. Mona ! Oh ! How do you do, Mr. Reeves ! Punch. Pretty fit, thanks. Alice. (To Mona) The girls have come. MoNA. Oh, have they ! You'll excuse me, won't 3'ou? (She goes tozvard door) Alice. They're up in your dressing-room. Mona. Ell be back in a few moments. (She goes in) Alice. My goodness, Mr. Reeves, you're getting to be a regular fixture round here ! Punch. Can you blame me, considering the at- tractions ? Alice. Oh, go on, now ! You don't mean me ! (She sits in swing, evidently ready for an inter- esting flirtation) Punch. Who else? Alice. I think you're a regular jollier. Punch. You don't like a fellow when he's telling the truth. Alice. Well, men are so deceitful ! I was engaged to three different men once, and do you know what I found out? Every one of them was engaged to another girl! If you don't call that de- ceitful ! Punch. Three men, eh ! Talk about being a jollier! Alice. Oh, but that was when I was young. I'm diflferent now. (She looks at him from under her lashes) 44 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT Punch. (Bending tozvard her) Don't change any more. You're just perfect. Skeets. (Who has entered at r., unobserved) Say, won't somebody notice me? Altce. Oh, hello Skeets! When did you come? Skeets. They put me under the door with the early morning papers. I see, Punch arrived with the milk-man. There's no use talking, Punch, you're a pest. Alice. Have the other men come? Skeets. They have. They're anchored down by that red and white lunch wagon. I left Sam fighting them away from the punch bowl. They've got pink tea hydrophobia. Punch. Trifle mixed, Skeets. Skeets. Well, what's tea but spoiled water ! Anyway, it isn't the tea they are afraid of — it's sassiety. Awful stunt Miss Fitzgerald's asking the club to do. She'd better not introduce any of her friends to 'em, they'd bite 'em. Alice. Why, didn't they want to come to the tea ? I think it was a perfectly lovely idea ! (BoHANNAN enters r.) Oh, how-de-do, Mr. Bohannan? Come right up. Don't you think it was a perfectly lovely idea asking the team to meet our friends ? Bohannan. Excellent idea, indeed! Furnishes amusement to the newspapers ! I see one of the afternoon sheets is featuring it, under the head of " The Eagles are Fluttering in the Dove Cote." Alice. Well, I think that's real cute. Bohannan. Is Miss Fitzgerald anywhere about? Alice. I'll call her. She's upstairs with the girls. (Goes tozvard door) Oh, Skeets, don't forget what you promised me? Skeets. I won't! What was it? Alice. Oh, you know very well! {She exits) Skeets. {To Punch) She's got all my Tiflfany THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 45 ice. I'll bet she's after my Tecla. (Feeling his scarf pill) (BoiiANNAN sits grimly in chair. Punch and Skeets look at him and exchange a grin and wink. BoHANNAN ctttches the look between them.) BoHANNAN. I suppose you think it's funny ! The Club being made a national joke ! Skeets. Oh, far be it from me ! Let 'em laugh, it doesn't prevent our holding first place. BoiiANMAN. All this girl business ! We're getting to be a regular side-show. That's what. Field boxes packed with screeching females. It's demoralized the whole team. Skeets. Don't demoralize me any. When I hear those sweet voices yelling " Skeets ", I go to it ! BoHANNAN. It's Spreading like a disease. AVaync's taking up bridge. Bridge ! And I found Pitman down in the club house yesterday practicing the Tango ! Boys. Pitman ! Ha ! Ha ! BoHANNAN. It's nothing to laugh at. We've lost two important games by it ! Skeets. Oh ! Was that why we lost the games ? BoHANNAN. PIm ! I suppose you're joining the general chorus that's yapping about my lack of judg- ment ! (He rises) Skeets. Oh, no ! I didn't mean that ! BoHANNAN. Fine thing! My own team sitting in judgment on me. Well, I might have expected it ! [He goes gloomily off tozvard r.) Skeets. (In a lozv tone to Punch) Gee! He ought to hire out as a mourner. W^hat's the matter with him? Punch. That's what everybody wants to know. 4-6 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT Skeets. He can't even get up a good healthy- grouch any more. Lost all his ginger ! Punch. He's taking the loss of those games to the Hornets pretty hard. Skeets. It was before that. Why, for six weeks he's been going around looking like an early Christian martyr. I'm expecting him to weep on my shoulder any old day. MoNA. (At doorzvay, zvith girls back of her) Girls, Alice will take you out by the front. There's a platform by the tennis courts for dancing. Girls. Oh, lovely, in the open air ! How per- fectly delightful! (They go from door through house, chattering and laiigJiing. Mona comes out. Alice thrusts her head out and calls to Skeets) Alice. OO — OO, Skeets ! (She beckons, and Skeets runs off after her) (BoHANNAN re-enters r.) Mona. Oh, Mr. Bohannan, it is good of you to have come. Bohannan. Not at all. I'm delighted. Mona. I was afraid you didn't like the idea. I've invited Mr. Welland just for you. Bohannan. Welland? Mona. Yes, the owner of the Hornets. I met him at the Park the other day. I thought he'd be nice for you to talk to, if you found us too frivolous. Shall we go down to the Marquee? I want to welcome all the men. (As Punch, Mona and Bohannan go dozvn steps, Pitman enters from R. He looks rather uncomfortable in his best clothes) Mona. How do you do, Mr. Pitman ! Pitman. Fine ! Where do I go ? Mona. Oh, just make yourself at home. I'll introduce some of the girls to you presently. (Mona, Punch, and Bohannan go off) THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 47 (Pitman looks about intimidated by the surround- ings. Comes up on loggia. Sits for a moment on a little straight-backed chair. Finds it un- comfortable. Gets up, examines it, and going over, sits in szving, szvinging and grinning to himself. A maid comes out ivith tea-tray.) Pitman. Fine day. J}^, you shouldn't have discharged that stenographer. I nabbed him up and 88 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT Welland. You think you're smart, don't you? Cop. No. Only lucky. That's all the direct evidence I've been able to collect. Now, as to cir- cumstantial. Here's your note to Punch on the night before the last game with the Hornets. Then there's the big money you lost on bets with that Wall Street crowd. There's your record on the French turf, where you were ruled off for Welland. That's enough! Cop. Think so? Welland. I know when I'm beaten. What do you want ? Cop. I want you to do a little mathematical stunt. Welland. Eh? How much? Cop. Find the shortest distance between here and the front gate. Multiply that by a sprint to New York. Subtract yourself from base-ball for good, add a little trip to Europe, and put it all to the credit of American sport in general. Welland. You're on. (Moves toivard windozv) Say, young fellow, if I had time I'd stop at Burns' office and tell him he needs you in his business. Cop. Oh, don't bother. Burns and I are old friends. It was he who got me your record. Welland. Well, I'm damned ! Cop. Eternally. Good-bye. Bunn Voyage ! (Welland goes hastily out at zvindozu and makes tracks for front gate. Cop takes papers from mantel. Puts deed in his •wallet. Tzvists the other papers together and lighting a match, zvatches them burn, throzving the remains into grate) Alice. {From basket chair) Oh, Skeets ! You haven't shaved to-day. Skeets. (Rising from chair and pulling Alice up after him) You mean it? You'll sign with me for life with a reserve clause ! Alice. I don't know. What's a reserve clause ? Skeets. It's a binder. (He puts his arm around THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 89 her and they go doivn into garden, as Punch comes up on porch) Hi, Punch, it's all over but the shout- ing! {He and Alice exit. Punch looks after them and then conies into room. Sees Cop) Punch. Oh — ! {He turns to go out again) Cop. Wait a minute: I want to talk to you. Punch. I haven't got anything to say to you. Cop. But I — I've a few things to say to you. Why don't you come back to the apartment, Punch, and let things go on as they were ? Punch. I told you I wanted nothing more to do with you. You had no right to pay Bohannan to stay with the Eagles. Cop. I didn't pay to stay with the Eagles. I've told you that. Punch. Welland saw your check, you don't deny that? Cop. No. Punch. It's my money as much as yours. You only had it in trust. I — I know I've lost out this time, but I've had my lesson, and six months from now you'll give me an accounting of every penny you've spent, or I'll know why. Cop. I'm going to give you an accounting next week when we divide the estate. You'll find you haven't lost anything by my deal with Bohannan. Punch. Next week? Cop. Surely you realize that the six months are up to-day. Punch. But — but Cop. She said for you to come for her answer when the six months were up. I want you to be able to — to go to her. Punch. You mean — you mean you won't tell? Cop. I mean there's nothing to tell. Punch. But how are you going to account for locking me up? Cop. That's a matter between you and me, old 90 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT man. {He puts his hand on Punch's shoulder) Punch. {Shaking his hand off) I don't want you to swear to any lie for me. {He sits in chair) Cop. It won't be any lie. I haven't seen yon that way for six months. Punch. {Doggedly) You should have seen me. You should have gotten me straightened up for the game. You've done it before. What did you want to lock me up for, and go off and make that grand- stand play? You figured it all out, you and Bohannan — you can't tell me. You wanted to queer me, I don't care what you say. You wanted to queer me. Cop. I don't think you mean that. Punch. Punch. I do mean it. It's been the same way all my life. You've always been the model. It's been damned easy for you. You had nothing to fight against. Cop. You remember our mother, don't you? (Punch makes an impatient gesture) I was older than you, and she — she talked to me a lot before — before she went away. She had a horror of — of — She made me promise I'd never touch anything. It wasn't easy. When I was at college I wanted to hit it up. I used to leave the fellows and walk for miles to — to down it. I understand. I know the fight you've been putting up. It's been a good one. I've been with you every foot of the way. Punch. You? Cop. Father didn't make that will to punish you. He only asked six months. He wanted to give you a foot-hold. You've got that. You can't slip back now. I'm pulling for you — Oh, I can't gush — but damn it ! you're all the family I've got, Punch, and — (Punch breaks doivn and puts his face in his hands, shaking with sobs) Don't do that, old man. I — I only didn't want you to think I'd double-cross you. THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 91 Punch. (Rising) Cop, you're white and I'm — I'm Cop. Aw, forget it! (Puts out his hand) (Punch takes Cop's hand and zvrings it; then breaks obntptly ozvay and goes up to zvindow to recover himself. Enter Mona.) MoNA. Oh! Cop. Just been congratulating Punch, Miss Fitz- gerald. You know, he's just finished his six months at hard labor. Likes it so well he's sentenced him- self for life. MoNA. Oh, Punch, I'm so glad ! Mr. Reeves, they want to see you in the library. They're talk- ing of having Bohannan up before the Commission. If you can say anything — my uncle was so fond of Bohannan and Cop. Don't worry, Miss Fitzgerald, I can clear him in three words. (He goes out) MoNA. I'm awfully glad, Punch, that Cop says you've won out. Punch. I'm going to — I'm going to be different from now on — Mona. You told me MoNA. Don't say it ! Don't ! Oh, I don't know what you think of me, but it's all been a mistake. I told you to come to me when the six months were up, but — but now, I can't give you the answer you want. Punch. Why? MoNA. I — I don't care for you that way: I — I'm sorry. Punch. It was that scene at the club-house. MoNA. No — no before that. Something — = changed — here. Punch. There's someone else? Mona. No ! No ! There's no one, no one ! Punch. There's no use in fighting, then ! I may 92 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT as well go to the dogs and be done with it. Very- well ! {He turns to zvindozv) MoNA. Punch ! Punch. Fm sorry I said that. I didn't mean it. I — Fve seen a man to-day, and I — Fm going to try- to be one, too. Good-bye. {He goes hastily out at zvindozv) (MoNA sinks on chair by table and burying her face in her arms, begins to sob. Pitman comes up on porch zvith Miss Squibbs.) PiTMAK. {Looking off l.) Well, I swan! Look-a there. {At the sound of their voices, Mona hastily dries her tears.) Miss Squibbs. Who's that man with Copley- Reeves? Pitman. Fll be goshed-danged if it ain't the President himself arm in arm with Cop, as sociable as kin be ! Mona. {Running to zvindozv) Oh, Mr. Pitman ! Run after them, tell Mr. Reeves I want to see him. Pitman. Sure, Ma'am. Come along, Elvira. Run along with me. Miss Squibbs. Run ! My running days are over. Pitman. Sure they are. You've caught up ! {With a zvink and a grin he runs hastily off porch) (Miss Squibbs comes into room.) Mona. Squibbsy, he called you Elvira ! Miss Squibbs. Well, there's no law against it, is there ? Mona. You don't mean, you — you and Pitman? THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 93 Miss Squibbs. Well, you're going out of base- ball just when I'm getting interested. MoNA. But Pitman, oh, Squibbsy, he hasn't any education. Miss Squibbs. He's got a good bank account, and I think I'd love to travel about with the team. MoNA. But he won't be able to play much longer. Miss Squibbs. Oh, I don't know. With me nursing his wing ! (Pitman appears at back aud whistles a call.) Pitman. " Whoo — whoo." Miss Squibbs. {Pursing up her lips in answer) "Whoo — whoo." {With a grin and perky little skip she joins Pitman outside, as Cop conies up on porch. Pitman and Miss Squibbs go off. Cop comes into room) MoNA. I want to know — the result of your inter- view ? Cop. Oh, it's all right. It's all right for Bohannan. MoNA. You were going away without telling me, and I was so anxious. Cop. Well, I thought you'd be busy. You and Punch — I thought MoNA. Punch is gone. Cop. Making a streak for Tiffany's, eh? MoNA. No ! No ! Cop. Oh, that was cheeky of me. Sort of brotherly cheek, you understand. MoNA. Mr. Reeves, Skeets told Alice about that night before the game with the Hornets : why — why you locked Punch up. Cop. Skeets told ! MoNA. In confidence. He told it in confidence. He didn't tell anyone but us ! 94 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT Cop. And you — you've turned Punch down on account of that ! MoNA. No — no — it wasn't for that! Cop. He was dragged into that. It was only a little party. All the fellows do the same. You know, the women won't let fellows like Punch alone. He's got to be polite to 'em. It wasn't from any lack of loyalty to you. He'll settle down. He's got it in him. MoNA. I know ! I know ! But I don't care for Punch in that way ! Cop. You don't care for Pitman ! But you must, you've got to ! MoNA. Mr. Reeves, you will allow me to judge for myself in a matter of this kind ! Cop. Oh, of course I — just as you say! MoNA. I want to say good-bye. I shall perhaps not see you again: I'm going abroad. Cop. You're — you're going away? MoNA. Yes — I — Almost at once — good-bye ! (She puts out her hand, he takes it. Looks at her hungrily and then turning, takes his hat and goes toward zvindozv) Cop. Good-bye ! MoNA. Wait! I'm going to see Mr. Bohannan this afternoon. He'll be anxious to know how you cleared him about — about accepting that money from you. Cop. He didn't accept any money from me. He has some real estate that I wanted. I bought it, that was all. I'll show you the deed. MoNA. Oh, no, no! I believe you. Cop. I'd like you to see it. (He takes out wallet and in extracting deed from it, pulls out Mona's lace handkerchief, which falls on table) MoNA. Oh ! Why, this is my handkerchief. The lace one I lost at the garden party. Cop. Er — er — is it? Why — er — that's odd. MD 3. 9 THE GIRL AND THE PENNANT 95 I^.IoNA. Yes, it is odd ! But not half so odd as you. Why did you keep it? Cop. Well, you see, I just kept it because it was yours, because I — I loved you. (Mona fiirns from him) There, I've done it. I didn't mean to insult you like that. Forgive me. Mona. I can't. {She turns slightly to him) Why didn't you tell me before ? Cop. Eh? JNIoNA. Oh, Cop ! Have I got to propose to you ! Cop. Yes ! No ! Mona, you don't mean it ! MoNA. I'm faint. If you don't catch me, I'll fall. (Cop chisps her in his arms. Base-ball men come up on porch.) Wayne. Miss Fitzgerald, we're all here. (MoNA and Cop pay no attention.) Skeets. Ssh! Skidoo! (All tiptoe off porch as curtain descends.) 4^ /-.^ ^^--^ 4 o^ ^ . ^v IBS BROS. ■' '> V s\ •'4, CV .0 » RY BINDING ,• .iV /-. *^ jS^fflWfes %- *P j, xO' ► Hk .t* .._.-.. -^ . ... . . a\