PR 5377 .S5 P4 Copy 1 ri'on in. ■-...J'^~^X...!' ^ 'r?,.-, t .-> '. .eJX CIaA.-^ . ; t.X t-\A^' ■i„-'t,,W« 4f from as foutib in §>t0t?r of iif rrg Gjpyright January, 1913, by THE SISTERS OF MERCY Wilkes-Barrfi, Pennsylvania Raeder Publishing Comijany Wilkes-Bart^, Pa. .9^. <"13 ^. )C!.A34S613 ^/ r> Prpfare "Full many a flower is born to blush unseen, And waste its sweetness on the desert air." To know and to realize are just a trifle less far apart than to know and not to know. The superb pictures so often painted against the oriental sky— framed by receding night and the horizon — just at the break of day, are well known but badly realized and consequently poorly appre- ciated. The exceptional one, who does realize, has an enraptured tingle shot through every fiber of his sentient being and every faculty of his soul. Admiration, reverence, praise and love of the Omnipotent Artist thrill the extremes of his nature. The one who knows only, rarely looks up a second time, and thus it comes that even the Master's work is held commonplace. Just a glance and nothing more. This phenomenon is urged in justification of the present volume, Selections from "Parerga," as found in "Cedar Chips." The compiler claims no merit except that of new combinations which she, a student and teacher, hopes may attract a more adequate recognition to the originals. Efforts along this line may be applauded, too, in these days of Free Libraries, Circulating Libraries, Carnegie Libraries and the rest ; particularly, if one may pin one's faith to Emerson's dictum : " The Colleges furnish us no professors of books and I think no chair is so much needed." May this book find an honored place on the literary Signal Corps. Prosit ! JOHN J. McCABE. Wilkes-Barre, Pa. January twentieth, nineteen thirteen These selections from "Parerga" are used by permission of the author, Rev. P. A. Canon Sheehan, D. D., and the publishers, Messrs. Longmans, Green, and Co., to whom 1 am indebted for this kindness. The Compiler. ®fl (§m 21alii| of Mnt^ I "have been at a great feast and stolen the scraps." "Selections have their justification. They serve a double object, — to introduce and to remind. They provide the unadventurous reader with the easiest way to learn a little of an author he feels he ought to know ; and they recall the fruits of fuller study to the memories of those who have passed on to other fields." Cedar Chips ;ne "I would ask thee three questions," said the Prince. "And first: when is man greatest?" "When he laughs amid his tears ; when he suf- fers, and is silent; when he labours, although he foresees he never shall be paid," answered the man. "Where is woman greatest?" asked the Prince. "By the cradle of her child, by the couch of the dying, at the feet of God," said the man. "When is God greatest ?" asked the Prince. "There are no degrees in God," said the man de- voutly. "He is always greatest and best." "Come!" said the Prince to his companion; "I have found him whom I sought." Two Cedar Chips I know that some people decry sentimentality, — good, pious people, — on the score of religion; fash- ionable people because it is emotional ; and emotion is the one unforgivable sin. The former forget that shortest, but sweetest text in all Holy Writ : And Jesus zvept! The latter might know that it is this very emotionalism that marks them off from the animal creation, inasmuch as it is neither instinct nor passion, nor sensuous nor base, but only some higher element, consecrated by a memory tenacious of what is tender and reverent, and softened down by that sense of dependence or protection that is the highest bond of social life. Oh. yes! Thank God for our poets ; and thanks, O shade of Tennyson, for that line, no matter how sad it may be : "The tender grace of a day that is dead Shall never come back to ine." Cedar Chips """fee (dnntraHta of iCtfp Nothing surprises me more than the contrasts of life. I notice that sometimes a little circumstance that passes unheeded and ineffectual in every-day life, becomes suddenly magnified in a certain junc- ture of accidents into an event of vast importance. And the most trivial offence against morality, which perhaps for generations has passed unheeded, sud- renly develops into a crime, which receives exem- plary but disproportionate punishment. But these singular contrasts are in no wise so manifested as in the estimate that is placed by men on human life. Here in the wards of a hospital is a little child whose life is imperilled in the grip of some dire disease. Lights are lowered ; footfalls are made inaudible by slippers of felt ; night and day, a skilled and trained nurse never leaves that bedside; grave doctors come in three or four times a day, examine with knitted brows the diaries or nectaries of the nurses — pulsations, temperature, food, liquids, the action of medicines ; develop furious tempers if there is the slightest appearance of neglect; anx- iously consult with one another; open heavy tomes for new lights ; go away perturbed ; return with deeper furrows on their foreheads; and all this science and skill and zeal — to save that little thread of life that vibrates in that tiny child. fo"' Cedar Chips And if death intervenes doctors and nurses feel that they are defeated and shamed. They pass by that little waxen figure with averted eyes and down- cast heads. Death is the victor, and he waves his black flag in derision above their heads. There was life, — life in its most humble and tiniest form, and they have failed to save it. Yet those same doctors will pass from the bedside of that child where they fought such a desperate battle, and, taking up the morning newspaper in the hospital surgery, read with perfect composure and little interest of twenty thousand lives lost in a tidal wave in Japan, or a thousand lives lost in a South American earthquake, or a regiment or two blown to atoms suddenly by a concealed mine in some mad human conflict. How do you explain it? Professional honour? No. That won't do. Honour is not at stake. They have done all that men can do. Tenderness for that child ? No, alas ! The cases are too common : and tenderness vanishes through familiarity. And they don't allude to honour ; and they don't assume a tenderness they are far from feeling. No! It is life! life! It is their duty, their vocation, to save life, no matter how mutilated and miserable it shall be. And they have failed. Cedar Chips f'^« Here is a poor young girl who sat out during the warm days in the sunshine, eagerly grasping every sunbeam to extract from it a life- elixir. A few years ago, conscious of her great beauty, she almost spurned the flags of the village street, as she walked with springing step in all her Sunday finery, and knew that the eyes of many hun- gered after her. Then her own home became too small for her ambition. America alone was large enough for her desires. She went away, became a unit, an insignificant unit amongst millions, whose eyes, dazzled with the glare of gold, had no sight for her beauty. Then came sickness, sadness, a craving for the old home, where she could at least die in peace, with friendly faces around her. She sat out during these few weeks, patient and sorrowful, her physical beauty etherealised by the dread dis- ease that was slowly eating away her life. She has disappeared. It is easy to imagine the rest. The eternal hacking cough, the night-sweats, the ever- growing weakness, the depression, the despair — the calling on God at the midnight hour to plunge her into the blessed forget fulness of a dreamless sleep! 5« Cedar Chips And yet, if one in mercy, whispers even the name of death as the one hope-giver, she shudders, looks frightened, and weeps. She cries all night long for unconsciousness, for sleep. But the unconscious- ness of death is an unspeakable terror. Why this inconsistency? Is not death a blessed thing. — God's greatest and most beautiful angel, who comes to us so softly, and so gently unweaves the bands of flesh, and touches so quietly that wound that the very touch is an anaesthetic ; and gradually weakens and uncoils the springs of existence, so that when at last he touches the last frail thread, it snaps without pain, and the soul sinks into a langour that is a sweet pre- lude to the eternal rest? Why do men fear it? Is it the inertia of life that will not bear transmission? Or the habit of life that will not bear being broken? Or the dread of "The undiscovered country, from whose bourn No traveller returns " ? Or a foolish fear, as of children who see spectres everywhere, and will not walk on unknown land. lest unseen terrors should leap forth to paralyse or appal ? Cedar Chips ^®^*° ©I|p Mm Witl} tl|r ^at I am not at all sure but that manual training should go hand in hand with, and even precede, mental training. Very often the mind, slower in its development than the body, can afford to wait. And, besides, manual training is mental training, inas- much as it develops powers of observation, accuracy of thinking, patience in watching details, and the labour of perseverance. But, apart from that, no mental training is a compensation for feeble mus- cles, weak nerves, myopia, and the host of other evils that are inseparable from purely sedentary lives ; and no mental acquirement or intellectual success is compensation for that growing contempt for honest manual labor which is becoming one of the most vicious and unpleasant symptoms of our advanced civilization. "Back to the land!" is the cry of all economists of the present day ; and "Back to manual work !" may also be the warcry of those who are painfully conscious that our advanced civil- ization is more or less that of a race in its decrepi- tude, and on the downgrade towards extinction. At least, it seems very certain to some minds that it is the "man with the hoe," and not the man with the pen, we need mostly in these times. E'g*^' Cedar Chips Hence I cannot help feeling a certain contempt or loathing when I behold young men, just budding into the twenties, calmly putting the pillows of old age under their elbows, and settling down to a long life of most ignoble inactivity. It is not alone the Sybaritic baseness and selfishness of the thing that repels, but the very horror at the incongruity of studied idleness and uselessness amidst the general activities of Nature. Clearly these are mere para- sites of Nature, and the word has an ill signification. It means not only idleness and uselessness, but theft, disregard for others' rights, preying on the industries of others, eating bread that is not right- eously earned. It may be a safe life and a secure one, where none of the lower evils are encountered, and there is always a kind of dulcet monotone of un- disturbed serenity. But if great trials are avoided, great deeds also remain undone, and, in hugging a miserable sense of security, the possibility of noble- ness is utterly lost. Cedar Chips Nine &nmr O^rrat SJJral Every man should have a great ideal in life — some high point in character or action to be aimed at, even though it be never attained. No man is absolute arbiter of his fate, or parcellor of his des- tiny. Will-power counts for much, but only when conscience is laid aside. "If you want to make your way in the world," says a witty French writer, "you must plough through humanity like a cannon-ball, or you must glide through it like a pestilence." Had he his countrymen Napoleon and Voltaire before his mind, when he penned these words ? But "mak- ing one's way in the world" is not the attainment of the high ideal of which I speak. It is rather a low ideal, the poor ambition of fox or beaver, or their human types in commerce or the professions. It is an animal instinct. It marks a man as belonging to a degenerate type. It is not the symbol or phrase that designates the higher call to the higher issues towards which humanity is bound to tend. Ten Cedar Chips Better to have written on our tombs : "Labo- ravi," or "Passus sum/' than "Felicissimus fui." I have seen two faces quite lately on whose foreheads such inscriptions had been already chiselled. One was the face of a gentlewoman, grown old in peace and prosperity, on whom the world had always smiled. Peace had been her portion, and old age was not infirmity, but the crown and consummation of the unbroken felicities that had been her lot in life. One could be thankful, but one could not wor- ship there. The other had been sculptured by life- long sorrow, — perpetual sickness, loss of material resources, falling away of friends, deception where honour had been expected, derision for no fault but for having borne the whips of Fate. It was one of those faces, which externally calm, are ever ready to break their surface serenity by the trembling of a lip or the gathering and falling of a silent tear. One might well worship here. We are in the sanc- tuary of sorrow. Cedar Chips ^' even An 3lmparttal but MnrraBnnablr ®i|tng It is hard to argue against the fear of Death, especially with the young. So many passed by, and they chosen ! So many old and forlorn creatures for whom life had no pleasure, because no hope, trembling on the verge, and yet apparently forgotten by the angel Death! So many worthless creatures, whose lives do not contain a single utility, — nay, whose very existence seemed detrimental to every cause and individual with whom they came in con- tact ; and lo ! Death passes them by, and leaves the barren fig-trees untouched ; and lays his heavy hand on some life, that was bourgeoning out in all fair promises of vast utility to itself and mankind. So argues a second patient of mine, a young man, stricken with that dread disease, cancer. He is not impatient nor disconsolate. He is resigned. But he cannot understand. He is perplexed by the mystery of things. He has had his sentence of death duly passed on him ; and the numbered hours are fleeting swiftly by. But he is young. He clings to hope. The local doctor is on his holidays. He has a chance now. Perhaps some other may speak a word of hope. He summons him by telegram. He presents the following diagnosis of his formidable disease. Twelve Cedar Chips A Prraonal liagnnata "Seven months ago, in South Africa, I under- went an operation for epithelioma of the antrum, necessitating the excision of the left superior max- illa ; and, on account of exopthalmus, the left eye had to be enucleated. Since then my voice has been badly impaired ; and so I wrote down these partic- ulars, my artificial palate not working properly of late. A few months after the operation, anaesthesia extended along the temple and forehead on the left side. It has now crossed the middle line, and in- volves the whole forehead and scalp. I have been laid up for five days with a swollen eye-socket. It is with respect to the latter that I wish to consult you. Since the operation, the socket has been in a state of inflammation, with a profuse whitish dis- charge. It is now greatly swollen. The temple on the same side is also much swollen. The pain is not very great, but there is a feeling of uneasiness and oppression. The wound cavity left by the oper- ation is looking well, and there is no evidence of re- currence in that quarter. I cannot account for the accentuation of the anaesthesia, for its extension, and for the aggravated state of the eye-socket. I would like you to tackle the eye-socket particularly ; that region is very anaesthetic, and is afifecting my head greatly. I may mention there is still some granulated tissue and constant extravasation of blood behind the eye-socket or at the floor of the orbit, as I pay constant attention to it, and know how it is getting on." Cedar Chips Thirteen I doubt if there were on this planet a more sur- prised man than that doctor, when he read this diag- nosis. The science of medicine is a secret science. Very wisely, its professors have wrapped up all its principles and discoveries in an occult and dead language. Its prescriptions are written in a kind of luminous shorthand, of which only some letters are of Roman type, the rest being cabalistic signs. It is a kind of calyptic cypher of which only one man holds the key. It is pitiful, but instructive to see how an ordinary layman turns over the mysterious paper in his hand, and stares in blank ignorance at it; and to witness his surprise when the chemist glances over it, and proceeds to interpret it in act. Then all medical books are written in great pon- derous symbols of sesquipedalian Greek, as if the writers kept Liddell and Scott always on their desks, and picked out the longest and hardest words. And then — watch the contemptuous and angry stare with which any layman, or even neophyte, is crushed who dares to touch even the fringe of medical mystery. It is a kind of sacrilegious invasion into a region where only the initiated are admitted ; and happy is the unhappy wight who is let ofif easily with the warning: "You had better leave these things alone, young man !" fourteen Cedar Chips It is the same with the Science of law. Here the adage holds, "The man who is his own lawyer has a fool for a client." And we know how sternly is the prescription enforced in the courts of justice, that no man can be heard unless through the lips of a lawyer. You may be as learned as Scaliger, and have all the legal lore of Chitty and Bacon and Coke at your fingers' ends : but if you presume to in- fringe upon the hereditary rights of the legal pro- fession, you may be assumed to have sacrificed your best interests. "By whom are you represented, sir?" is the dire question. "By myself!" "Oh!" And your case is lost, that is, if you are permitted to speak at all ; for, in certain courts, you cannot plead except through the instrumentality of a lawyer. Is this right.'' That is not the question. We are but stating facts — that a cordon is drawn around the learned professions by rule and statute, by prescrip- tion and tradition ; and all who are not initiated into the mysteries, who have not eaten dinners and sawed bones, are rigidly excluded. Right or wrong this exclusiveness undoubtedly surrounds the professions with a certain atmosphere of reverence which mate- rially helps to keep sacred the inner workings, which would soon be profaned by exposure. Cedar Chips ^^' een Strange to say, it is only theological science that has no such bounds and ramparts as these. It is a commonage where every one may stray at his own sweet will. It has been invaded, overrun by every class and every individual from the beginning of Christianity until now. Under the Jewish dispensa- tion, it was kept apart and sacred from the multi- tude, — hedged in by every kind of legislation, prim- itive and prohibitive. No man dared touch the Holy Mountain ; no one but the High Priest was privileged to enter the Holy of Holies. One tribe was set apart for the priesthood. All teaching and all legis- lation came from the lips of a consecrated priest- hood. Still more exclusive and dominant were, and are, the sacred hierarchies of the Eastern religions. The Lamas and Brahmins allow no lay-interference with their privileges. Even kings and emperors must keep aloof. Their lamaseries and monasteries are sacred ground, where no one dare trespass with- out permission. Their traditional teachings are such that no man dares contravene or challenge. But no sooner was Christianity established than a Simon Magus tried to penetrate and purchase its mysteri- ous powers : and from the first, laymen, from the Emperor down to the prefect, sought to usurp the sacred rights of the Christian priesthood, and mould the dogmas of the Christian faith to suit political exigencies or private whims. Sixteen Cedar Chips Then came the great rebellion, with its cardinal principle that theology was no science ; that religion had no mysteries ; and that every man had a perfect right to frame his own dogma according to the di- rection of private interpretation. iVnd whilst all other sciences became more exact in their guiding laws, and sought to render more rigid every day the boundaries of professional exclusiveness ; whilst great generalisations broke up into special depart- ments, and each department surrounded itself by ahattis after abattis of rules and ceremonies, the vast domain of theology was broken into by every scarilegious and impious speculator, and all its mys- teries were profaned by hands that held them up to the public gaze either as commonplace truths that no man could deny, or fraudulent presumptions that no man could accept. And to-day, scientific men of every rank and grade, biologists, geologists, astron- omers, legislators in every shape, literary men through the press, judges on the bench, and even the "man in the street" crowd through the broken defences and tumbled barricades to plough and sow, and reap a sorry harvest where once was the wheat that made the Bread of Life, and the wine that ger- minated virgins. Cedar Chips Seventeen An Unart^nttfir Srparturr Apart from the desecration and the unreasoning fury and folly of all this, it is a distinct departure from the secret and inviolable laws that direct the operations of evolution in Nature and Society. For we know that the lower the organism, the more sim- ple are its organs and operations. In certain zoo-^ phytes, each part is capable of every function. As we advance higher in the scale, the functional ener- gies, becoming more extended^ demand new organs for their operation ; until we reach the higher mam- mals, where every function has its own specific or- gan, localized and developed. The same tendency exists in the body politic, where all the energies are again speciiically located, and, though obedient to and progressing from a common centre, are concen- trated in some council, or society, or department, whose operations, if controlled from a centre, are yet specifically distinct, and more or less independ- ent. In the science of theology alone, there is, on the part of the masses, an idea that, dissolved as a science, it had better be allowed to drift back to primitive elements — which are the thoughts of indi- viduals — for dogmata, and the vagaries of human passion for moral and ethical principle. E^li'een Cedar Chips And yet theology is a science, a great science, a complicated science; a science to the upbuilding of which were devoted the energies of the greatest in- tellects that have become incarnated on this planet. A world of iconoclasts, such as that in which we live, may pass by with unbowed heads the statues of St. Augustine and St. Thomas ; and may affect never to have seen the shrines where saints and scholars, like Ambrose and Bernard, are niched for ever. But they cannot break them. And so long as the printing-press shall last, there shall remain the record of their studies in the greatest of human sci- ences, and the results of their researches into the recesses of mysteries, which are to-day, as yesterday, as closed secrets to the eyes of science as they were when men believed that the heavens were domed above the earth as the centre and pivot of space. It is pitiful to see the easy and flippant way in which modern sciolists dispense with the consideration of questions that agonized the minds of TertuUian and Augustine. Cedar Chips Nineteen No Mgatrrg in Mthxtint Yes, my good doctor was much surprised. He seemed not able to take his eye from that page where the dying boy had recorded the dread symptoms of the disease that was slowly eating away his life. He whistled softly to himself, looked curiously at the patient, whispered the mysterious words, "epi- thelioma," "enucleated," "antrum," "maxilla," and finally asked : "You have been a medical student?" "No!" was the faint, muffled whisper that came from the diseased throat. "I am a journalist!" "Oh !" "But," the doctor said, after a pause, "no one but a medical expert could have written this ?" "I made a study of the disease when I knew I was affected," was the reply. "Rather a foolish thing," said the doctor, main- taining the professional exclusiveness. "Not at all," was the reply. "There is no mys- terv about it." The doctor shook his head. This was rank heresy to his mind. He turned to me. ■»» Twenty Cedar Chips lltra (Crrpi&am "Strange," he whispered, although the hideous malady had destroyed the boy's hearing, "how things work. The blow falls here and there; and there appears to be no rule, no uniformity, no consist- ency." I nodded acquiescence. "If any one were to ask why this boy, clever, accomplished, enterprising, should have been struck down on the very threshold of a brilliant career, whilst hundreds of mere hinds and louts go free, where would be the answer?" The good doctor never saw that he was passing ultra crepidarn. He who would resent, who did re- sent, the trespass of that poor boy upon the sacred precincts of medical science, was now unconsciously usurping the office of theologian. For medical sci- ence has only to deal with facts, I presume, — physio- logical facts, pathological facts, materia mcdka, etc., etc. What has a doctor to do with philosophy, — with motives, reasons, causes of things? Let him keep to his scalpel and his stethoscope ! But no ! Every one must have his say about these transcen- dent mysteries that have ever stupified and puzzled the human mind, as if they were market-merchan- dise, to be turned over, and pulled asunder, and ex- amined and valued by every hind, or huckster, or vivandicre, who wants a cheap bargain. Well, after all, it argues the existence of something more than a beaver or squirrel faculty in man, and, as such, is worthy of some esteem. I thought this, but did not say it to my good doctor. Then I took the thought home with me. It was my property. Cedar Chips Twenty-one An Autumnal QIgpp My first autumnal type has plunged suddenly downwards from affluence to poverty, and has kept his equanimity unruffled. He had been in the en- joyment of some thousands a year; had had a sub- urban villa so filled with all sorts of art-treasures that one could scarcely move around his rooms. The walls were so lined with etchings and engrav- ings, statuettes and pictures, bronze busts and plaques, that scarcely one square inch of paper was visible. Out of doors his gardens stretched up in stately terraces, one rivalling the other in splen- dour, until the whole beautiful vista terminated in a pavilion, again filled with all kinds of costly and artistic things gathered from repositories in the great cities of the world. Here, from time to time, that is very often, he brought together numerous friends from city and town, regaled them with every luxury, amused them with every kind of entertainment, until the place became a little Paradise above the sea, which lent to the scene its own enchantment. Then came the crash. The whole thing vanished like a dream. It was many years after that when I visited the place again. I had seen it in the very' zenith of its glory, and had taken away and stored up in the maps of memory a beautiful picture of the place, of its surroundings, of its generous and kindly master. I passed by in the dusk of the evening. The high wall that shielded from vulgar observation all this loveliness was broken down. I went in. The magnificent pavilion was a mass of ruin ; its perfect flower-beds were overgrown with nettles. The splendid urns that capped the pedestals were slimy and broken. It was a picture of ruin and desola- tion. Twenty-two Cedar Chips Soon after I met the former master of this ruined paradise. Ahhough past his seventieth year, he was still in all his autumnal splendour. Fate and ill-fortune had not touched him. The same bright- ness, the same cheerfulness, the same bonhomie, the same optimism that had made him the centre of his circle some years before, had not abandoned him in adversity and penury. "I am a happier man to-day," he said, "than when I had thousands to spend. I have a room during the summer down near the sea, and two rooms here in the city for the winter, and a cool hundred a year. I have no responsibility now. I needn't ask John, Dick, or Harry to dine, and to tell you the truth," he added, with a smile, "I'm not likely to be asked myself." "What?" I cried. "You, who entertained like a prince — do you mean to tell me that you are never challenged by any of your former friends to a paltry dinner?" "Never!" he said frankly. "And what is more, they cut me here in this very street!" "The hounds!" I couldn't help saying. "Do you mean to say that not even has an open house for you?" He shook his head, but always smiling. "He doesn't see me when we pass here. Or rather he does, and goes to the other side of the street." Cedar Chips Twenty-three "Why, the last time I saw him," I cried, " 'twas in the Pavilion. He had a glass (and a good long, tall one it was) of champagne in his hand, and he was diving into a lobster salad as hard as he could. I remember I had to jump his long spider legs when I was coming away." "My dear fellow," he said, "don't you know 'tis all human nature ? When I had all these friends at the Pavilion, feeding them and entertaining them, I was pleasing myself. There is one phase of human nature. When they choose to cut me, there is an- other. Did I expect anything else? Certainly not. I know the world too well. And what difference does it make? I can now pass along here without bothering about anyone. I can stop and look at the shop windows without being molested. I know no one, and no one knows me. Tant mieux! Hallo Jiff! Jiff! Jiff!" He took a boatswain's whistle from his vest pocket and looked anxiously around. Far away, a little black, woolly terrier was dodging tram-cars, side-cars, and passengers. When she heard the well-known whistle she scampered over to her mas- ter's feet. "Good day," he said; "I am glad to see you for old times' sake." "Good day," I replied; "I am glad to have seen the greatest Irish philosopher after Berkeley." Tweniy-four Cedar Chips It is a gusty, windy, autumnal day. The wild west wind has burst his bonds and is thundering up from the horizon, driving huge black clouds before him, like the disorganized phalanxes of a conquered army. And he has caught in his fierce embraces the forest trees, and shaken them, and clashed them to- gether, till the whole sky is mottled with flying leaves, spinning in the whirlwind ; and the ground is growing thick with the red refuse of the dying year. And, quite appropriately, another autumnal type of character crosses my path. He is grizzled and gray before his time; and some sharper chisel than the years has cut channels in his cheeks, and sunk the orbits of eyes that smoulder in repose, but gleam with a terrible light when you touch one sub- ject. And how can you avoid it, when it embraces everything of interest, — that is, men and women — the world — the race — humanity Tolerant enough, polite, even charitable in a large measure, he be- comes absolutely ferocious when you turn the con- versation on the Zeit-Gcist. The fact is, he com- menced badly, — with a large, childlike, hopeful, trusting faith in human nature, which has now changed into a fanatical hatred. I can quite under- stand it, although he has never explained. Cedar Chips Twenty-five Sarlg SJttiratton I see him coming forth from a home where he was surrounded with all that was sweet and beauti- ful and sacred, where he never leaned against any- thing harder than a pillow, and the flutter of a rose- leaf was not allowed to ruffle his sleep. He was taught — O stulti et caeci corde! — that the whole world was like this! — that truth, honour, purity, sweetness, modesty, benevolence, were to be his guardian angels through life ; and that, above all, he should smile on the world to get back smiles in return. It was a long story, the story of his dis- illusion, for he clung with despairing tenacity to his childhood's principles, until, one by one, they came to be disproved, and the last shred of their protection was torn away, leaving him naked to his enemies. What was worse, he found, in all authors who had become sacred to him by reason of their lofty standing in literature or from early associa- tions, that the same principles, endeared to him by early teaching, were carefully inculcated until they had become a faith, a religion, interwoven into his life. Twenty-six Cedar Chips SiaiUuatnn The progress of the world, the perfectibiHty of man, the advance of the race from civilization to a yet higher civilization, the elimination of all phys- ical evil and all moral taint, until the apex was reached, where man should stand forth the immortal realization of an idea,— all these phrases and sen- tences had become the symbols and embodiment of the theories that had touched the enthusiasm of his youth, and inspired the more sober opinions of mid- dle age. Alas! slowly and painfully he awoke to the knowledge of human imperfection, deepening, as the years advanced, into a knowledge of human ig- norance and iniquity, and culminating in the autumn- nal years into a recognition or belief in almost uni- versal depravity. He was not saddened, but mad- dened, by the revelation. Even though it had slowly grown into a conviction, it carried with it the shock, the surprise of a sudden unveiling of deeps too terrible to be contemplated or measured. Like some monomania that is suddenly engendered by brain fever, or that grows out of painful experience, his mind was ever revolving around it ; and his conver- sation, no matter from what distant pole it started, invariably turned back to the one topic on which the wheels of thought moved as on a pivot. Cedar Chips Twenty-seven lEburatton nnh Sxprrirnrr "I can pardon a good deal," he would say, "but I cannot condone your crime in educating children as you do. You teach them that it is dishonourable to lie or steal ; you teach them to be merciful and kind and self-effacing; you teach them an altruism which is divine rather than human. And you teach all this on the understanding that the world will give back as it receives, and mirror the riant and bland expressions of ingenuous youth. You take that child from school, and the first lesson the world teaches him is, that all the wheels of life and society are moved by lying and hypocrisy. You place that boy behind a counter where, if he lies not, he is in- stantly dismissed. He is taught, and not only taught, but ordered, to put a price on his goods and merchandise not according to market values, or current charges, or a scale of legitimate profit, but according to the appearance of his customers. You put him in a fair or market. He instantly knows that he must lie foully for self -protection, for every man amongst these thousands has come hither to swindle or to cheat. You give him a profession. He lies with his fingers on his patient's pulse. And he will save the most consummate scoundrel from the gallows, and drive the most innocent beneath it, for that bribe called a fee." Twenty-eight Cedar Chips JIuBttrf ISlind "Look at your Courts of Justice. Every police- man knows that to gain the good-will of his officer, he must swear up to the mark. Every Crown Prose- cutor feels that he is not there to discriminate the guilty from the innocent ; but to put the halter around the neck of that trembling wretch in the dock. The quarry has to be run to ground, and he has to do it. That is all ! His professional rep- utation will suffer if that wretch escapes. Tears of wife or children, or thier unutterable delight ; de- spair of devils, or ecstasy of angels, such as will al- ternate in these human hearts contingently upon the one word uttered by yonder bland foreman. — these have nothing to do with the matter. He wants that one word, Guilty! otherwise that venison pasty will be tasteless, and that champagne will be flat as ditchwater. And all the time Justice stands blind- folded with her scales in her hands. Why should the bandage fall or be removed ? Will not her paid advocates lead her aright, and drop that heavy sword into the scales against the condemned with a solemn and conscientious P^ae Vktis? Cedar Chips Twenty-nine And your statesmen! Here is the sublime "He has Hed boldly," said Talleyrand. "There's the making of a mighty statesman in him." "Diplo- macy," "statecraft," "political foresight," "civic wisdom," etc., etc., what an accommodating lan- guage! How it lends itself to euphemisms! And how beautifully men gather up the skirts of easy words and wrap them around bald and naked ugli- ness, as the clothes of the world hide and dissemble all the ugliness of deformed humanity! "But," he cried, with a fillip of his finger, "a truce to all that! I don't heed it! Let the world damn itself in its own fashion. I'm not going to play the part of the faithful Abdiel. But," he cried with bitter emphasis, "if I had the education of children in my hands, I would have a Fagin-school with several Artful Dodgers in every parish to teach the young idea how to adapt itself to the larger and more intri- cate systems of prevarication and swindling that are current in the wide world of men. And I would teach them to steel their hearts against every human feeling; and smile as their seniors smile when they are practicing the arts of hypocrisy and deceit." I shuddered at this tirade against the species. He went away with his head down and a frown on his fine features. Thirty Cedar Chips QIirrl|i anb (HumuU The next evening, I thought, I should not let even one of such glorious October sunsets escape me. Fading and evanescent — as all beautiful things — indeed, as all things are (but somehow the beau- tiful seems more frail than the sombre and the dreadful, probably because we wish it to remain), — yet, there is no reason why we, too, frail and evan- escent beings, should not take from them such pleas- ures as they afford us. And surely, if there be a harmless gratification, it must be that wdiich arises from the contem])lation of such sublimities as the mighty Artist and Architect of the Universe pre- pares for his wondering, but ungrateful children. This evening, as if with the touch of a magician's wand, all the sombre splendours of last night had vanished; but there was cpiite enough of water- vapour to catch and reflect the beauty of the dying sun. Instead of vast purple and black cumuli, rest- ing like some mountain of desolation and grandeur on the rim of the horizon, long strata of cirrhous clouds stretched from north to south in parallel lines. The eastern horrizon was crowded with pink cloud- lets, darkening to deej) purple on the sky line, and in the zenith, the faint and feathery shadows were crimsoned, and then gently vanished, as the sun fell from his orbit into the burning and glowing west. Cedar Chips Thirty- one An Surntwg #tar But all the other cirrhous flakes of cloudlets were masses of burning gold resting on foundations of grey vapour, which, in turn, as the departing rays of the dying sun struck them, were transmuted into red and yellow nuggets of molten metal, with an occasional break through the green sky, as of an alloy to test their value. I had to shade my eyes from their blinding splendours, until, with involu- tion after involution, the glowing masses melted into each other, or dropped their golden radiances from cloud to cloud as the sun descended. It was as if some potent stage-manager or stage-painter was flinging his majestic colours broadcast over the vast curtain of the heavens, until, his palette run dry and exhausted, the splendours faded away, so si- lently, so gradually, with so much tenderness and pathos, that I could only think of the farewell kiss of a dying child, or the gradual fading away of those spirit-faces that artists have drawn on canvas, but never seen in the flesh. Then out came one star, dancing and caracoling in the broad heavens that he had now to himself. "Pah!"' I cried, for the sor- row of the thing had crept into my heart, "it is like a ballet dancer on the altar of a deserted cathedral !" TT'^'y-'^'o Cedar Chips "Say rather a herald of eternity!" said a voice, and a soft hand rested on my arm. I did not shake it off. I did not shake it off, because it was my Poet, my dreamer of dreams, my Alter Ego — the being with whom alone I can freely converse, and open out my mind with the certainty of being un- derstood and believed. With him alone I am at ease, for to him alone am I intelligible. When I converse with other men I feel that I am speaking to statues, which stare irresponsively at me. When I speak with him I know I am addressing a soul. With other men I speak about human topics : — their politics, their commerce, their wars, their food, their dress. With him I speak of higher subjects, — the soul, eternity, the course of history, the trend of human events : Nature, — the eternal Spring, earth with its thousand aspects, the Heavens with their dark secrets, Life, and the shadow that waits for us all with the keys. If ever I touch on merely human things, a cloud of disappointment and vexa- tion crosses his fine features. He is eloquently silent, and runs his fingers through tangled and un- combed locks, with just now the winter blossoms beginning to gleam through their gold. When I speak of higher things, his face glows. The foun- tains of the great deep are broken up. Cedar Chips Thirty-three An Apnlnga far Angrr "What are those tears for?" he said, for my eyes were red with the sorrow of the sunset, — type of all ephemeral and vanishing things. "For the sorrow of the world/' I said, "and its sad destinies; for the perishing of all that is most fair, and the permanence of all that is foul and sor- did. For the earth, which is but a cradle of suffer- ing; and for man, who weeps when he is born." "But you were more than this," he replied. "You were angry, and you used a scornful expres- sion. Now, that is an evil mood towards Nature or towards man." "Angry?" I cried. "Yes! I was. Who could help being angry in face of such deceitful and fad- ing splendours? And then, as if to mock me, out comes that flippant and foolish star, dancing on the floor of the firmament, and flapping his fingers in my face as if in derision? Why, 'tis all mockery, mockery, — earth, and sea, and sky, and the faces of children, and the roses in my garden ! Under- neath all is the grinning visage and the castanets of Death !" "Yes ! yes !" he cried, with an impatience that rarely showed itself in his fine face or courtly manners. "But why anger? Don't you know that the inevitable is also the indispensable ; and that it would never do for ephemeral beings such as we to be brought face to face with immortal beauty ?" Thirty.four Cedar Chips "There! You are always saying hard things," I cried. "The inevitable is the indispensable! What is it? What do you mean?" "What do I mean? Why, we have talked of these things a hundred times over, and yet you ask me what I mean. I mean simply this, that so long as we are but passing shadows, we are not capable of being confronted with infinite and permanent re- alities. That in fact, permanence is not for us, only the res caducae, the flitting and fading phantoms that belong to an order of things that preludes the stability of eternity. Hark, friend! If all that splen- dour over which you now wept had remained, you would have tired of it in an hour and gone back to your books, murmuring: 'The eye is not filled with seeing; nor the ear satisfied with hearing.' " It was true; and I had only to take refuge in silence. "But mark how foolishly you spoke," he con- tinued. "You wept over a piece of painted vapour — a little aerial moisture reddened by the setting sun; and you ridiculed what? The mighty sun, Arcturus. to which your sun is but a farthing candle, and which is now lighting up with unimaginable splendour the atmospheres of planets, to which our little earth is but a sand-grain. It is the old, old story. We cling to shadows and weep for them ; and then blaspheme the Eternal." Cedar Chips Thirty-five ilnrking thp Strrnal "But, but," I cried, confused, you speak thus because you are not mortal. You have no human feeling. You live amongst the stars. There is nothing but cold, frozen thought up there on the altitudes where you dwell with your poets and dreamers. Look, you, my friend, the tear that soils the cheek of a little child is more to me than if your Arcturus were to heave and burst his elephan- tine bulk, and strew all space with his fragments. This is our world ; and it is enough for us, at least whilst we are here." "Quite true," he replied. "Then why are you always dreaming, dreaming, dreaming of other things? Why did you sadden in that sunset? It was like yourself, transient and paltry. Whv did you not accept it as such? No! You went out beyond it : and you said it mocked you ; and you, in turn, mocked the Eternal." "It's enough to make any one savage." I cried, — "this eternal duplicity and deception of Nature. Lo ! splendours as of the third heavens, and behold, they are gone whilst we cry to them to remain forever !" " 'Tis not a subject for mockery, or savage an- ger," he said, meeklv. "What then?" I cried. "Infinite Pity !" he said. Thirty-six Cedar Chips "And men, with their infinite and ever-winding intrigues and deceptions ?" "Infinite Pity!" he said. "And those white women, half-angels, until you suddenly see some flash of soul that reveals their deformity?" "Infinite Pity!" he said. "And those placed aloft in the high domains of the world, to be burning and shining lights to their generation, until you come near and see the flame of their spirit flickering, unsteady, darkened with the smut of carbon, and swaying to and fro in every gust of passion?" "Infinite Pity!" he said. "And mighty statesmen, ordering the destinies of nations, but prepared to change sides and principles for a piece of ribbon from a sovereign, or a whifT of popularity from the great unwashed!" "Infinite Pity!" he answered. "And teachers, — poets, preachers, prophets, with their 'everlasting yeas,' and 'everlasting noes,' lead- ing mankind by the hand up the steep escarpments where valour and truth alone can find a footing; and then suddenly descending to the basest levels to quarrel over their cups, or play the valet to some coroneted patron?" "Infinite Pity!" he still answered. Cedar Chips Thiny-scven A liatinrtint! I shook him off — this Doppelganger of mine. I was wroth with him and with myself, wroth, above all, because I had to determine was this the final answer — the last response to the eternal enigma. Infinite Pity ! For all suffering and harmless things, yes ! For the redbreast frozen into iron on a January morn- ing; for the wounded creature of the woods that creeps into its hole to die unseen ; for the silver wonder of the brooks that lies gasping on the grass, held in the fierce steel of the fisherman; for my aged dog, who lies in his hutch in my yard and looks at me wnth such piteous dying eyes, they haunt me all the day long; for our human brother or sister, who calls for night, and night forgets its mercy, and who watches the faint dawn glimmering through the window-pane, with the prospect of another day of anguish ; for the wretch in the dock, with the merciless faces around him, steeled against all com- passion by merciless law ; for the victim helped to the scaffold, his arms supported by warders lest he should fall ; for the last October sunset, and the last rose that hovers in my garden over beds of snow, — for all weak things, for all stricken things, for all sad things, and all dying things, — Infinite Pity ! Yes ! By all means ! But for all the strength that smites pitilessly; for all the cunning that intrigues successfully; for all the duplicity that lies boldly; for all the smiles that cheat blandly ; for all the tyranny that grinds mercilessly ; for all that is strong and severe and pitiless : for all that is loathsome and degrading and masculated, — Infinite Pity? No! Thirty-eight Cedar Chips As the prophet of old foretold of the sweet and gentle Shepherd of Humanity, I think I could gather up and fold in my arms all tender, gentle, and frail things on earth, no matter how passion-swept, or into what deep abysses betrayed by their own inex- perience or the malevolence of others. Nay, even for one that "wanders like a lost soul upon the Stygian bank, waiting for waftage," I feel I could have great i^ity, which is akin to great love. But for the base nature, that comes to you sometimes in life, rubbing his shoulder against yours to pick your pockets, tossing out carelessly and confidingly a petty secret to get at your sealed and solemn sorrows, and then snap you up, as X'ivien did Merlin in the enchanted oak ; for the creature who comes fawning and purring around you, proffering his petty gifts, and protesting his disinterestedness until, thrown off your guard, you fling the creature what he wants, and he goes his way, his hand on the button of his pocket ; for all puny souls that have no circumference or scope of vision beyond that of a coin, and who think more of a piece of ribbon than of the colours of a simset, and whose base insolence to the weak is hardly more irritating than their base subservience to the strong, — I confess to a feeling of repulsion akin to that one feels for slimy and dan- gerous things ; no great wish to crush or annihilate, but a decided desire to shun and avoid, and place some impassable thing, an ocean or a Sahara, be- tween us! Cedar Chips Thirty-nine A Mimtlv of AJiaptation And yet— are not these things, too, a subject for nifinite wonder, — wonder at the miracle of adapta- tion that seems to exist everywhere? For, after all, without moral evil how can there be moral virtue? If all men, by a miracle, or rather by a transforma- tion of our nature from its striking and painful con- trasts, were reduced to a dead level of uniform goodness and perfection, where would be those trials that develop all the grandeur of the great and heroic? If Xanthippe did not create the genius of a Socrates, she at least has helped us to know him better. Without an Antiochus, should we have had the heroism of the Maccabees ; the grave chas- tity of Susannah, without the perfidy of the elders? Had there been no Nero or Domitian, where would be the superb record of the countless martyrs of the Coliseum ? It needed the malice of a Gesler to create a William Tell, the state policy of Napoleon to paint on the pages of history the gentle bravery of the Due d'Enghien or the fearless manhood of Hofer. We could not weep for the martyred nuns of Compiegne had there been no Robespierre or Marat. And to ascend to the highest— where would have been the supreme tragedy of our race, if Jewish priests had been generous, and Pilate had hearkened to the plea for justice from the lips of his wife? Forty Cedar Chips lEutl tt|p ISnot of (^aah So, too, on a lowlier scale, we find that all good seems to arise from evil. Endurance cannot exist without hardship, patience without annoyance, se- renity without pain, joyousness without injustice, chastity without temptation, meekness without pro- vocation. If the world was reduced to one dead level of happiness, mankind would grow hebetated from want of energy. It was cold and hunger that framed the flint arrowheads and bone needles, the relics of pre-Adamite man over yonder in Kent's Cavern. It is the sense of the same evils that puts Australian beef on the London markets, and places the skin of an Arctic seal on the shoulders of some woman of fashion. Necessity, that is, pain, begets energy ; and energy develops faculties that otherwise would weaken and perish from lack of exercise. In the moral order, it is the same. Moral evil begets Virtue. The narrow, distorted, and vicious soul, prone to deceit and aggression, and chuckling at its own trivial and transitory success over some larger and nobler mind, is quite unconscious that it has been the means, the fertilizing agent, of a larger growth in the latter. "All things cooperate unto good for those called to be saints," said the Apostle. And may not this principle be the strongest proof of immortality, — that the greatest evil shall produce the largest good, and from the dark and bitter root of death shall spring the undying flower of immor- tality ? Cedar Chips ! orty. one (§ti}tr itgra tl)an ©ura _ In the higher life, I often think that the same inability to penetrate into the minds and under- stand the feelings of others lies at the root of all these racial and religious prejudices that have wrought such havoc to humanity. It is the rarest of rare talents— this of being able to see things throrgh other eyes than ours. If one considers for a mo- ment that each mmd has its own idiosyncrasies and !u"^ri? '\^ ""T infallibility, it is easy to understand the dithculty of reconciling the repellent tendencies and mutual antipathies that must exist between races and religions. Home influences, early education later reading of one-sided and prejudiced books the interchange of common and hostile ideas on one subject— must of necessity create a bulwark of prejudice that it seems impossible to break through or subvert. We all know the totally absurd opinions that are entertained towards churches of different denominations,— towards members of a hostile race or a hostile political party. In the vast majority of such cases the prejudices are irremovable and in- eradicable. No amount of reasoning can convince • no appeal can soften. They have never learned to go outside themselves and see through others' eyes Man to be wise, must study the vices and virtues of winch human nature is capable, first in himself, and then, in all good faith, in others Forty-two Cedar Chips I well remember a distinguished convert to the Catholic Church telling me that, when a boy, and even when he had passed into adolescence, he never passed the humble and modest Catholic church m the city where he lived, without flying past it at racing speed. When I asked him what he dreaded, he answered he didn't know ! It was nothing speci- fic ; but some vague sensation that there was some- thing inside those walls horrible beyond imagina- tion ; some occult and dark doings, which were not to be examined or approached, but fled from in ter- ror. It was clearly his early education.— the home and Sunday-school teaching that the Catholic Church stood for something unnameable— that it was the symbol of darkness, the outer shell and simulacrum of everything men shrink from and avoid Probably that man would have earned these prejudices to his grave if he had not met with some one who saw through his eyes, made account of all his perverse imaginations, and gradually opened the eyes of his mind to see what horrible and unrea phantasms had been haunting it, and how needful it was to employ the prompt exorcism of reason to expel them for ever. And strange to say, this was but an accident.— the accident of his sister's con- version, and the accident of his proceeding to Lon- don in 'a frenzy of zeal and anger, first to remon- strate with the priest who had received her into the bhurch, and then to convert that priest from the errors of Catholicism. He met his Ananias, and the scales fell from his eyes. Cedar Chips Forty-three But if ue were to suppose, per impossible, that we could stand by the side of our brothers who differ so widely and radically from us, and with a sympathy born of Christian charity could enter into their passionate prejudices and feelings, and make allowance for all the converging causes that led up to tms hardening of the heart, and think what we ourselves might have been had we been born and educated m similar circumstances, how it would widen our horizon of thought, help us to look around things, instead of merely at them, and help us to deal gently with all those unmeaning and irra- tional ideas that grow so slowly and take such deep and almost ineradicable root in human souls The thoughts of men on all possible subjects differ as widely as their features ; and even where they ex- ternally seem to agree, that is, when placed in words or actions, there is still a profound diff-erence And we must not suppose that all the wisdom of world IS stored up and centered beneath the dura mater of our brain Qui vit sans folic n'est pas si sage qu'il croit; and whatever wisdom or knowledge we pos- sess comes mainly through experience, which al- ways teaches the kindred and collateral lesson of our own impotence and folly. Forty-four Cedar Chips (Lift Snaanp No man can judge of insanity but the insane. There are as many forms of insanity as there are brain-cells; and, if you look over the motor and sensory areas, and try to study the internal construc- tion and ramification of each with its millions of cells, and remember how one diseased cell might easily set up that want of proportion in ideas, or that lack of nerve control which we designate as in- sanity, it is easy to perceive the value of the opin- ions of experts. There is no stronger argument against capital punishment than the impossibility of determining who is sane, and who is insane ; and there is something pathetic and tragic in the curious tradition that a man's life may be made dependent on the opinion of two experts who, presumably sane themselves, are utterly unqualified to express an opinion on the condition of the insane. The secret working of the brain-cells of a Plato or a Shakes- peare is not more of a mystery to a Hottentot, who has just emerged into civilization than the secret working of the diseased brain is to one who has never had experience in his own mind of that phe- nomenal, and yet quite common disturbance. Few men pass through life without acting once at least in an insane manner; and if we could read human thoughts as Omniscience does, what a vast and tumultuous asylum would not this earth appear ! "This beautiful madhouse of the earth," said Jean Paul. "Life is a tale, told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing," saith Shakespeare. Cedar Chips Forty-five Srinainna The senses, the imagination, the words of men, traditions, the habits of life all around us, the stere- otyped forms and manners of society, the lies that are fossilized by the ages, the tricks and pranks that mask deception under an appearance of bonhomie, and, above all, our own poor selves seem to be en- gaged in a horrid conspiracy to make our lives one long delusion until our final corisinnmatum. To know that happiness is in ourselves, and not in our circumstances; to be able to take the ordinary and accredited beliefs of men and sift them, and ex- amine them, and separate the chaff of folly from the grain of wisdom ; to look out with our own eyes upon the world, and to take sidelights on human happenings and events from others' experience, is a very rare talent. We run amuck with the crowd when the panic of life seizes us. We follow its train of thought, adopt its habits, walk in its ways, although we loathe ourselves for so doing. It is a rare thing to see a strong man step aside and pur- sue his own course undeterred by human hostile opinion ; who has the strength of silent scorn to up- hold him. and let the mad world wag on to destruc- tion. "Oh, all you that pass by the way," saith the beggar with the crucifix, whilst the gay and happy pairs pi youthful lovers, conning flowers or toying with jewels, pass down the staircases and corridors of life. "Come apart and rest a little while/' was the sweet invitation of the Divine Being, who knew how easily his poor disciples would throng after the ruck and rout of motley crowds to share in their poor, sickly, and dishonest adulation. "Come apart," — into the desert aloof and alone, — the silent stars above your heads, and the Eternal One by your side. Forty-six Cedar Chips An Example I once knew a man of imaginative temperament who laboured all his life long under a singular de- lusion. He was a merchant in a great city ; and. like all other merchants, his daily life was the drudgery of living from ten o'clock in the morning to six o'clock in the evening in a damp, dirty office, screened away from a vault filled with vast punch- eons of wine and spirits, cobwebbed and grey with the dust of antiquity. The office window, very dirty also, and lined with venerable cobwebs, barely al- lowed the eye to rest on the blank wall of another warehouse about six feet across a narrow alley. Even in Summer and at noonday the gas flared above his desk ; and through the twilight the figures of men — porters., labourers, customers — passed to and fro all day long to exchange opinions and trans- act business. The daily programme of the poor slave was : Rise at 8 A. M. Breakfast at 8 :15. Train to city. Office work from 10 A. M. to 6 P. M. Train homewards. Dinner at 7 P. M. Newspaper. Bed, 10 P. M. Sunday was broken by a morning service and an afternoon that seemed interminable. He took a yearly holiday at some European watering-place where he was killed from ennui and society. Cedar Chips Forty.seven (Sl^ainpii in a QleUar He was a wealthy man, but not a happy man. During his first twenty years, buoyed up and carried on by the stream of youthful hopefulness and ambi- tion, he really exulted in his work, although the frictions of daily life began to wear down his nerves, and the question would persistently arise and refuse an answer: "Whereunto tends all this waste and work?" Then, one day, he took up a volume of essays dealing with the attractions of country life ; the folly of treading the daily mill until we dropped into the grave ; and the wisdom of saying at some period or other of life, "Soul, sleep now, and take thy rest !" The idea haunted him for weeks and weeks ; and the recollection of a certain pretty villa down near the sea, where he had spent a few summer weeks, came up at office-time to disturb his serenity, and compel him to think that he was spending all the most glorious years of his life — a slave chained in a cellar. One day, too, a farming acquaintance of his dropped in, and, looking in a half-frightened way about the lugubrious place, said : "Good heavens, man, surely you don't live here? Why, one hour of these wine-smells and spirit- odours would chloroform me into eternity! Come out, man, and live a human life! Come out, and see our trees and rivers, and hear the winds whistling, and the brooks laughing, and the birds singing, and breathe the honest air of heaven, and not the me- phitic vapours of the tomb." The merchant shook his head, but the lesson went home. Forty-eight Cedar Chips He now bent eagerly to his task, because he had a definite object before him. — namely, to build up as rapidly as possible a fortune that would help him to get away from the chain-gang and the format, and spend the evening of his life in tranquil study (for he was a reader) and calm contemplation and en- joyment of nature unto the end. One morning he noticed a grey patch over his left ear; and he thought, I must push on and work harder, if I am to have time for my evening holiday at the end. And all the time that villa above the sea would float in a misty picture, framed in cloud shadows, but' richly gilded, above his dusty, ink-stained desk ; and ever>' night, as he closed the latter with a snap, he looked around and said : "Only a little longer ; a few years more, and farewell, you dusty wine-bins and cobwebbed bottles, for ever and ever!" And then he began to watch the papers for advertise- ments of sales of seaside villas ; and he began to dream, and dream, and ever dream of vast, beau- tiful oceans, with the white flame of a sail on the horizon, and long, purple twilights that dreamed themselves away into night, and a dusky library crammed with all precious volumes, and peace, peace, and rest, rest, for the long evenings of a happy life! Cedar Chips Forty-i At last the wished- for opportunity seemed to arise in accordance with his wishes. He had seen in the late springtime just the thing he had dreamed of so long, — the long white villa facing the ocean, the little lawn in front sloping gently downwards ; the sudden, abrupt cliff, the waves crawling or tum- bling in hoarse riotousness beneath ; and, behind, the deep, dewy fields of a valley, where a brown cow was grazing calmly, and a few sheep dotted the upland beyond, where the trees fringed the horizon and broke up the blue radiance of the sky. If he could have designed into actual existence the place and the circumstances he had so often desired, it could not have been better framed unto his wishes. With beating heart he read the legend "To Let" on the window-pane, and hastened to inquire — and pur- chase. He was so eager now to get away from the wine cave and the cellar that he would not hire the place. No ! he should become the absolute owner, so that no man could ever disturb his inheritance of such an elysium. It should be his from the zenith to the nadir, — from the centre of the earth to the dome of heaven ; and no man should venture on the sacred precincts without license or on trespass. He was surprised., almost shocked, to find how little was asked for it. He closed the bargain at once, and became the happy possessor. F'^'y Cedar Chips Then the ravens began to croak. They predicted that he would tire of the place in a month, in a quarter, at furthest in a year. "Wait," they said, "till November. Wait till the rains come down and the sea is blotted out, and he shall not see from week's end to week's end the face of a human being, except a half-tipsy fisherman or a strait-laced coast guard. Then he will pine for the electric light and tram, for the roar and bustle of the city." He heard it all, and calmly winked to himself. Envy! envy! The bane of gods and men ! The ever-present, never- exorcised demon that haunts all human hearts, and makes them sink at the thought of others' happiness ! No matter : he will go on in spite of all ; nay, he will bring down all these croakers in the early Sum- mer and kill them, one by one, by the spectacle of his happiness! Well^ he did bring them down, but happily there was no homicide. They came, ad- mired, rejoiced, and departed. He showed them how easily and pleasantly one could slip down in undress in the early, warm summer morning, and descend- ing the spiral iron ladder, plunge at once into the glorious sea. He taught them how to lounge, and kill time, and loll upon garden chairs after dinner, and smoke away the long, delicious summer even- ings, and play nap in the open air, and drink — sherbet? And if any landsman tired of the sea, he took him to the valley and expatiated upon cows and corn. Cedar Chips F"^"""* They all admitted that it was glorious, delicious, a fragment of Eden very much improved, because for the sluggish Tigris here was the heaving and restless, the treacherous and magic sea. They all said how delightful it was to go to sleep with your high windows open, and the breath of the clover was borne into your bedroom with the murmurs of the enchanted sea ; and how transcendently pleas- ant it was to sit down to one's breakfast after an ap- petising morning bath, and break your egg or fish whilst you glanced at the broad levels of shining sea before the window. But those evenings, those celestial evenings, when the setting sun empurpled the great cliffs opposite, and the vast mirror of the ocean modestly mirrored in pink and gold the gor- geous decorations of rock and headland; and tiny feathers of yacht-sails, or the larger canvases of fishing-boats swept as in a hollow mirror from rim to rim of the horizon ; and the plash of oars came up from the sea; and the muffled voices of young girls came borne in upon the warm breeze ; and the great moon came up blood-red from her sea-bath and paled into yellow glory as she mounted her steep escarpment of the sky, — ah, those celestial evenings ! No wonder anxious hearts should whis- per, in affected depreciation : "You have no chance of heaven, old man, after this!" f-fty-*^" Cedar Chips a ParaMarl" But he would only laugh — the happy possessor always laughs — and puff away at his cigar in happy contentment, and rail at the dusty city, and the noises and the cobwebbed cellar, and say : "My dear fellow, half the world does not know what life is." And the young men applauded and said : "Quite right. When you've made your pile, it is wise and right to step down and aside, and leave a chance for the young." But the old men, although they hankered after such freedom and happiness, whispered to each other as they sped upwards to the city by the even- ing train : "Do you know, I think old seemed to look wistfully after us. Wait till November! I'd bet a dozen of the best Havanas he'll be back in his office again I" But their wives said : "What a delightful place for children to play in for three months of Summer! What a shame that such a place should be in the hands of a wretched old bachelor!" They had just been praising his cook, and his dinners, and his delicious tea ; they had still wet on their pretty lips : "Oh, Mr. , what a Paradise!" Cedar Chips Fifty-three And so the weeks sped on. The "Villa" had almost become a show place. Every visitor to the seaside should see it, and praise it. The owner was very happy. Sometimes, indeed, the days dragged heavily on- ward. It was not always sunshine. There were times when a cold, grey look was on the sea, and the cliffs in the distance across the bay looked black and threatening ; and one by one, the visitors were departing for their winter homes, and the faces of the little children began to disappear. Then the terrific tyranny of old habits began to assert itself. The holiday was over; and every fibre and muscle began to clamor for old occupations, — the never-ceasing, ever-rolling routine of hours conse- crated to business, and hostile to slothfulness. He argued and expostulated against the tyranny in vain. He pleaded that he had had a life of unre- mitting toil and anxiety ; that he had a right to rest in the evening of life ; that he was past labour now ; and that peace and dignity were the rightful per- quisites and perogatives of age. In vain! Every faculty was clamouring for employment, protesting against the degredation of being wasted away in rusty sloth ; and the imagination, spurred by the tyranny of habit, and beaten back upon itself by the frigid aspect of external nature, began to call up with tender and solemn pity the days of labour that had passed; the fifty years in the warehouse; and all the many circumstances, which, bald and vulgar and prosaic enough in reality, came now from the caves of the past under the softened and hallowed light of memory, the great transformer, and scene-shiifter, and stage-manager of life. f'fty-f*'" Cedar Chips He tried to shake off the despondency, but in vain. He set himself, during these sad September days, to the task of reading and working. He laid out a programme for the Winter months. He would read Shakespeare through and through. He com- menced. After half an hour's conscientious labour on "Hamlet" he grew tired, and went out. Yes! there was the calm, irresponsive. Sphinx-like face of the sea, cold and grey like that battered and mutilated demon-face that stares over the desert sands, and seems to be contemplating infinity from eternity. He went back to his beautiful library, sick at heart. The early fires were burning in the grate, — of summer valedictory, of winter premon- itory. The beautiful books in all manner of costly bindings gleamed from the shelves ; and between them and above them, shone fair pictures, with deep, rich, gorgeous frames ; and lapping their edges were fairy palms and costly evergreens, pur- chased in the richest nurseries in the city. What do I want? the man cried. Here is what I have been seeking after for thirty years; and lo! it is ashes in my mouth. He went out again. Not a sail flamed across the surface of the deep ; not a fishing- boat made a speck across the grey monotony. And all was silent, songs of maidens, laughter of chil- dren, except with the sounds of eternity. Cedar Chips F^'y-fiv ICnnpUnpfla Two hours to luncheon! He took his cane and went out. He called on the curate, asked, begged, implored him to dine with him. He had not trou- bled much about him while the summer visitors were flitting around. He strolled over the cliffs. A few peasants were digging out potatoes ; the white sheep nibbled lazily the short grass ; far be- neath, the waves rolled heavily in, heaving as if in gasps of spent energy their bulk of water against the broken boulders ; the grey, solemn light lay brooding over sea and land ; far away, far, far away, on the horizon line, a plume of dark vapour marked the course of a passing ship. And everywhere si- lence, deep, terrible silence as of chaos before the turbulent voices of humanity were heard ; as of a ruined world, when the voice of humanity will be heard no more, — silence, except for the wash of the waters, that would be soothing perhaps to tired and worn nerves, but that now sounded harsh and hoarse in the ears of the man who had passed out of touch with nature, because he had stepped out of his place, and refused to take his part in the vast working-sheds and laboratories of the universe. f'f'y-^''' Cedar Chips He lunched with little appetite, and drank more than was good for him. Then he lounged along the lawn and smoked cigar after cigar. Twenty- times he looked at his watch, and counted the hours to dinner. He took up "Hamlet" again; and re- mained for some time brooding over the soliloquy of suicide. He flung down the book, and went out. He tried to get into conversation with a few rough, weather-tanned fishermen, who lounged up against the quay wall. He could only elicit a monosyllable. He walked over the cliffs again ; and after another two hours of misery, he returned to dinner. The good-natured curate was there. Two hours passed pleasantly by. Then a sick-call was brought, and the man was again alone, — alone with one word the curate, with no ill intention, had spoken : "How in God's name, can you live here., after your ex- perience of city life?" He brooded over it the whole evening through. He went to bed in a cheer- less mood, and dreamt that the spirit of the Sea, the Old Man of the Sea, stood beside his bed, and kept murmuring all the night through, — "Alone!" "Alone!" "Alone!" He woke up in the dreary dawn, and heard the hoarse wash of the sea mur- muring: "Alone!" "Alone!" "Alone!" Cedar Chips Fifty-seven And suddenly, swiftly, as if in a sudden eclipse of light and cessation of sound, the Winter closed in. There never had been so short a Summer. There had been no Autumn. The days seemed to close up, as you would close a telescope ; and the nights swooped down and hung their raven wings, poised above the desolation of nature, as if they could never close and vanish again. The dreadful loneliness and idleness hung heavily on the spirit of the man. He began to loathe fhe face of the sea. It seemed to stare back on him from its great ex- panses, cold and colourless as a corpse ; and the great cliffs beyond seemed to close in like walls of a grave of granite, so dark and gloomy, so hard and adamantine they seemed. He ceased gazing on the gloomy spectacle, and turned aside to the valley. Here, too, was all the aspect of wintry desolation — heavy fogs morning and evening, withered brack- en, blanched grass which the cows ate reluctantly, and broken mangolds which his workmen had scat- tered here and there across the field. And if he lifted his eyes, there afar off was the thin dark line of the horizon, where the cold blue light seemed to shiver under the lowering and ragged skies. f'f'y-^'g*'' Cedar Chips A (UrtBtfi To accentuate his misery, the morning paper brought news of the great city, — of its theatres, with new plays and briUiant companies ; of its concerts, where world-famed artists sang for money or char- ity; of great balls with military bands, and long columns of the names of citizens well-known to him ; and the vision of the brilliant and well-lighted city, of its long rows of gas lamps and electric lamps, of its rumbling tramcars, its wet pavements, the crowds of men and women passing to and fro, and all the human and even tender associations which are every- where leagued with great masses of humanity, rose up before him as he sauntered in melancholy mad- ness above the sea, or stared, with his finger in the pages of the unread book, at the coals that sparkled and burned in the grate by his lonely hearthside. It was so sad, nothing but shame and the dread of being laughed at kept him from fleeing instantly from the uncanny place. Then one day his two servants gave notice simultaneously. It capped his climax of misery. Next evening he was in the city. Cedar Chips Fifty-nine lark Again Although he had been but a few weeks absent, he felt like a stranger in a strange land. The tumult of the streets thrilled him through and through ; the vibration of the tramcar seemed to penetrate his nerves, and he trembled as he rose up awk- wardly from the seat, and groped his way with many a stop and stumble towards the entrance. He glided like a shamed ghost through the streets, afraid to be recognized; afraid of the Hallo, old man! which would mean insufferable things. He watched with the interest of a child who had come up to the city for the first time, the lighted shops, the sparkling jewelry, the long counters in ware- houses, with their lines of well-groomed clerks and well-dressed girls, curious, watchful, eager; he sniffed up the odours from the restaurants as a hungry man maddened with the want of food ; he could almost have hugged the newsboys, who shout- ed: B-e-evening Echo-o-o! At last he stood at the entrance to the narrow street where the offices and warehouses were, and paused. How would he enter? How face the welcome he was sure to re- ceive; or worse still, the smiles and winks of his employes, with their deadly, yet kindly meaning: / told you! Sixty Cedar Chips A Bramatir £ntrg He did the wisest thing he could do under the circumstances. He entered the old premises dra- matically. That is — he almost leaped in upon the sawdusted flags, shouted to the alarmed porters and labourers: "Clear out of my way!" pushed one or two aside, who thought an escaped maniac had got amongst them, and then took a hop, step and jump, and landed safely in his old chair beside the grimy, ink-covered desk. When he was recog- nised there was a shout of laughter, and all was over. The ancient partner came in. "You've come back?" "Yes! Don't say, for God's sake, 'I knew it!' or 'I told you so!' " "All right!" "I'll take my old place and hand you back the rhino !" "Very good. 'Twas a tight shave though. Mc- Allister wanted to throw ten thousand into the concern to-day." "You didn't?" with a face of alarm. "No ! I expected something. See ! your name is yet on our bill-heads !" "Thanks, old man! Now, tell me, is the old house let as yet?" Cedar Chips Sxiiy-one "I'm not sure. I think not. The bills were in the window last Sunday." "Would you — would you — mind seeing after it for me ?" "All right. To-morrow, or perhaps Thursday — " "Great Scott, man ! Some pedler will have swal- lowed it up by then. Look here ! 'Tis only five o'clock. Run down to Henry's, will you?" "All right. You're in the deuce of a fright." "No matter. And ask Henry to put in an ad. to-morrow : "To be let or sold. Beautiful marine villa; splendid sea view; lawn; spiral staircase to sea; beach ; meadow-land, etc., etc. But — no name ! mind, no name !" "All right ! Of course, you're coming to us until you settle?" "May I? You're too good. But how can I face Kate? She'll tonnent the life out of me!" "Never fear! She's too glad to see you back. And won't the youngsters kick up the deuce of a shindy!" "Gosh ! I hope they will. Let me see. I have time to run down to London. I must bring them something. You'll come back, won't you, and tell us about the house?" Si^-two Cedar Chips Then he sank into a pleasant reverie, watching all the while the corpulent and pompous puncheons, and seeming to expect every moment a salvo from the vast tiers of wine bottles that seemed like tiny- batteries of artillery peeping from their loopholes and embrasures. When no one was looking, he stepped softly down from his desk, and going over he actually kissed the steel ribs of an old Jack FalstafT of a whiskey cask, that had shone and glistened in its dusty cave for half a century. Then closing-time came, his partner returned, and he stepped out on the wet pavement again. For a moment he watched the crowd of people passing and repassing, a motley crowd, made up of every element of humanity, from the young empresses who, clad in their furs and sealskins, seemed to spurn the very flags beneath their feet, to the poor, decrepit creatures who begged an alms, or the wretched and degraded humanity which gathered around the doors of saloons. Then, with a sigh and a little smile he passed on, paused for a mo- ment, and leaned over the parapet of the bridge and saw a Milky Way of lights on quays and ships and waves, and then, humbled and happy, he ac- companied his partner to his hospitable home. Cedar Chips Sixty-three A few weeks later he came in as usual one morn- ing to business, put up his overcoat and hat, sorted, opened, and read his letters, wrote his replies, gave his little orders here and there, read the morning paper, and went out to a neighbouring restaurant at the men's dinner hour, for a modest lunch. When one o'clock had struck, and the porters and labour- ers trooped back from dinner, they found him asleep in his office chair. It was unusual, but they did not mind. "Old age!" they said. Later on in the day, he still slept ; and then they thought he was un- usually still. They shook him up and called his name. There was no answer, — none until the Great Assize. He had died at his task, — chained as he would have said with bitterness a few months ago, chained like a galley-slave to his task. But the bit- terness had disappeared under the test of experi- ence. He had died in harness, in the midst of his work ; and what death could be more honourable or desirable ? Si^-four Cedar Chips As I closed these random reflections on things in general, I sat in my garden in the twilight of a long summer evening. The sun had set, and the faint light was wavering between day and night. A huge bat was flying round and round in circles that seemed to be grooved for him in the air. Over my head a tiny spider hung down on a single thread. There was an cdour of jasmine and mignonette in the warm air. Close to my head was a thick clump of laurel; and one white tea-rose hung her beautiful petals against it as if for support. On the rim of one fair petal was a brown line, the first symptom and harbinger of decay. The air was so still I could hear her say : "Why am I sad?" you ask. "Because in a few weeks, a few days, I shall be dead, — buried there beneath the brown earth, whilst you are a perennial, an immortal !" "And is death an evil, and is immortality on earth a boon?" asked the spirit of the laurel. "Certainly," said the rose. "Even my short life beneath the blue sky, kissed by the winds, fanned by the wings of birds, has been supremely happy." "True, but see what is before me!" said the spirit of the laurel. "I have no Summer like you. because I am not a flower. But I have a Winter before me, and many, many Winters. Think of eight hours of pallid sunshine, and sixteen hours of darkness deep as the pit ; think of the rough winds that tear through me, the frosts that bite me, the snows that lean their icy burden on me, the lightnings that blast me, the men who shear and clip every little tiny shoot I put forth, until now. in my old age, I am childless and flowerless as the grave. Oh, my little sister, grieve not. You have been loved. That atones for death. Do not covet an immortality of loveless desolation !" And the rose said : "Yea. Be it so. Only let me lean against thee until the last." Index Sixty-five (Jfrnm "^arrrga") PAGE Three Questions § 84 Autumn 1 Sentiment § 73 Spring 2 Contrasts of Life §50 " 3 A Defeat §51 " 4 A Returned Exile § 17 Autumn 5 Death, the Hope-Giver §18 " 6 The Man With the Hoe § 39 Summer 7 Idleness §40 " 8 Some Great Ideal §41 " 9 Epitaphs §42 " 10 An Impartial but Unreasonable Thing... § 22 Autumn 11 A Personal Diagnosis § 23 " 12 A Secret Science §24 " 13 Other Sciences §27 " 14 Theology a Commonage §26 " 15 The Great Rebellion §27 " 16 An Unscientific Departure §28 " 17 Theology a Science §29 " 18 No Mystery in Medicine §30 " 19 Ultra Crepidam §31 " 20 An Autumnal Type §51 " 21 Guarda e Passa §52 " 22 A Philosopher §53 " 23 Another Type §54 " 24 Early Education §55 " 25 Disillusion §56 " 26 Education and Experience § 57 " 27 Sixty-six Index PAGE Justice Blind § 58 Autumn 28 A Fagin University § 59 " 29 Cirrhi and Cumuli §61 " 30 An Evening Star §62 " 31 My Doppelganger §63 " 32 An Apology for Anger § 64 " 33 Res Caducae §65 " 34 Mocking the Eternal § 66 " 35 Infinite Pity §67 " 36 A Distinction §68 " 37 A Good Shepherd §69 " 38 The Miracle of Adaptation §70 " 39 Evil the Root of Good §71 " 40 Other Eyes than Ours § 71 Summer 41 Early Prejudices §72 " 42 The Wisdom of Experience §73 " 43 The Insane §74 " 44 Delusions §75 " 45 An Example § 76 " 46 Chained in a Cellar §77 " 47 Only a Little Longer §78 " 48 "To Let" §79 " 49 Ridiculed §80 " 50 A Fragment of Eden §81 " 51 "What a Paradise"! §82 " 52 Memory §83 " 53 Despondency § 84 " 54 Loneliness § 85 " 55 Alone! §86 " 56 Winter Closes In §87 " 57 A Crisis §88 " 58 Back Again §89 " 59 A Dramatic Entry §90 " 60 A Reverie §91 " 62 And Then? §92 " 63 A Garden Dialogue §101 " 64 ^m 12 ^^^^ LIBRARY OF CONGRESS 014 529 715 1