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 itfeiel jfflftlp !§p t|© home (jirele 
 
 BY 
 
 S. C. FERGUSON 
 
 AND 
 
 E. A. ALLEN. 
 
 •-e^- 
 
 
 CINCINNATI: 
 
 CENTRAL PUBLISHING HOUSE 
 
 1880. 
 
 ir 
 
;** 
 
 ^v 
 
 COPYRIGHT BY 
 
 S. C. Ferguson and E. A. Allen, ^ 
 
 I88O. 
 
/ 
 
 V^J 
 
 
 n 
 
 UP HE design of this work is to rouse 
 to honorable effort those who are 
 asting their time and energies through 
 indifference to life's prizes. In the fur- 
 therance of this aim the authors have 
 endeavored to gather from all possible 
 sources the thoughts of those wise and 
 earnest men and women who have used 
 their pens to delineate life and its possibil- 
 ities, its joys and its sorrows. They do not claim 
 to have furnished more than the setting in which are 
 placed these " Gems" of thought gathered thus from 
 sources widely different. 
 
 Their hope is, that they may be able to rouse in 
 the minds of the careless a sense of the value of 
 existence. To those who are striving nobly for true 
 manhood or womanhood, they would fain bring words 
 of encouragement. They trust that many may de- 
 rive from its pages inspirations which will serve to 
 make real their hopes of success and happiness. 
 
 Cincinnati, January i, 1880. 
 

 £**. 
 
 Life ill spent — Life's Real Value— A Triumph or a Defeat— Power 
 over Life — What True Life Means — Prospective View of Life — The 
 Journey Laborious — Man does not live for himself — Failure or Success — 
 Possibilities of Life — Steady Aim Necessary — Life a Struggle — Duty of 
 Right Living, Page 29 
 
 Thoughts of Home — We never forget Home — Power of Home 
 Thoughts — Home Memories — Home the Fountain of Civilization — Influ- 
 ence of Home — Home Experiences — Home a Sensitive Place — Qualifi- 
 cations of Home — Home Affections — In what a Home consists — Home 
 Happiness composed of Little Things — Home a Type of Heaven, 3$ 
 
 Home Circle a Delightful Place — The Nursery of Affection — The 
 Heart's Garden — Importance of Home Affections — Requisites of Home 
 Love — Importance of Home Language and Habits — Home Circle the 
 Center of Affection — Love an Important Element of Home Happiness — 
 Children in Home Circle — Influence emanating from Home Circle — 
 Home Circle soon broken, 47 
 
 us e Oi©^> 6 
 
 Care of Parents for Children — Children should return Parents' 
 Love — Dangers of Forgetfulness on Part of Children — Duty of writing 
 to and visiting Parents — Children should try to make Parents Comforta- 
 ble and Happy — The Love of Mother to Son — Son's Duty to a Mother — 
 Loss of a Parent — The Grave of a Mother, . . . . '. 54 
 
 Infancy the Morning of Life — Parental Anxiety during Infancy — 
 Parental Responsibility — Parental Duty — Influence of Infants — Infants 
 the Poetry of the World — Infancy and Death — Graves of Infants, 60 
 
CONTENTS. 
 
 Childhood the Happiest Time — Child's Soul without Character — 
 Power of Imitation with Children — Children incited by Example — Praise 
 of Children — Reproving Children — Parents' Duty to make Childhood 
 Happy — Children the Ornament of Home — Fleeting Period of Child- 
 hood, Page 67 
 
 Love between Brother and Sister Pleasing — Power of a Sister's 
 Love— Depths of a Sister's Love — Love for a Sister a Noble Thing — 
 Power of a Sister's Influence — Sister's Duty in this Respect— Each 
 Necessary to the Other's Welfare— The Ideal Girl — The Ideal Boy, 74 
 
 Manhood the Isthmus between Two Extremes — Pursuits of Each 
 Age — Early Manhood Potential for Good — Claims of Society on Young 
 Men — Young Men's Duty in this Respect — Young Men should cultivate 
 their Intellect — Thinking makes True Manhood, .... 80 
 
 True Womanhood a Noble Thing — Error Women make — Womanly 
 Power — Woman's Moral Influence — Source of Woman's Happiness — 
 A Good Woman never grows old, 88 
 
 An Important Theme — Parents' 'Duty to make Happy Homes — 
 Influence of a Happy Home — In what a Happy Home consists — Busi- 
 ness Man's Home — Pictures in a Home — Conversation at Home — 
 Parents should study Children's Character, . . . . .96 
 
 Duty ever at Hand — One Danger of Home Life — Children trained 
 at Home — Home Language — Happiness of Children — The Domestic 
 Seminary — Education of Children — Children's Duties to Parents, 104 
 
 ^Ittx of MHk- 
 
 An Aim Essential — Danger of an Aimless Life — Daily Need of 
 Life — All can accomplish Something — All must labor — Choice of an 
 Occupation — Must do your own deciding — A Second Profession — Man- 
 hood the Most Noble Aim, 1 1 1 
 
CONTENTS. 
 
 §««*§§ at? iaHtt^e. 
 
 All Desirous of Success — The Two Ends of Life — Success only won 
 by Toil — Danger of overlooking this Fact — Earnestness the Secret of 
 Success — Traits of Character Necessary to Success — All can accomplish 
 Something — In what True Success consists, . . . Page 118 
 
 cS*§«**¥ of 8»fco*. 
 
 Labor the Lot of All — Labor a Glory — Civilization the Result of 
 Labor — Life necessarily Routine — Labor not an End of Life — Victories 
 of Labor — All Honest Work Honorable, . . . . .125 
 
 ^e£geve^«ttee. 
 
 Value of Perseverance — One Man's Work Compared with the Total 
 Amount — All Excellence the Result of Perseverance — Example of Gib- 
 bon — Results of Human Perseverance — Nature's Lesson — Perseverance 
 and Genius, 131 
 
 Enterprise distinct from Energy — Seeks for Novelty — Necessity for 
 Enterprise — Enterprise an Inheritance — Value of Self-reliance — Demands 
 of the Hour, 138 
 
 cf" e ^9V- 
 
 Energy is Force of Character — Resolution and Energy — Energy 
 and Wisdom — Man's Duty — Value of Energy — Success the Result of 
 Energy, 145 
 
 H?tt.tl«:ttt£tXrt^ . 
 
 Value of Punctuality — Punctuality a Positive Virtue — Punctuality 
 the Life of the Universe — The Value of Time — Punctuality gives Force 
 to Character, 151 
 
 Necessity of Concentration — Must concentrate Energy for Success — 
 Evil of Dissipation — Concentration not One-sidedness — You must pay 
 the Price of Success, 159 
 
 m 
 
 CCt; 
 
 Quality of Decision — Necessity of Decision — Courageous Action 
 necessary — Foster's Remarks on Decision — Unhappy Results of Indecis- 
 
8 CONTENTS. 
 
 ion — Decision of Character a Necessity of the Present Age — Decision 
 not Undue Haste, Page 165 
 
 §*lf-@ottftd 
 
 encc. 
 
 Value of Self-confidence — Difficulties a Positive Blessing — Reliance 
 on Good Name — Great Men have been Self-reliant — We admire Self- 
 reliant men, ; 172 
 
 What is meant by Practical Talents — Difference between Practical 
 and Speculative Ability — Knowledge of Men Indispensable — Intellectual 
 Knowledge — Education — Perfect Knowledge of Few Things, . 179 
 
 Value of Intellect — Education a Development — Education covers 
 the Whole of Life — Education Right or Wrong — A Just Appreciation 
 of Wisdom — Importance of Exact Knowledge, . . . .187 
 
 gjewtal gaining. 
 
 Necessity of Mental Culture — Power of Trained Intellect — Mental 
 Training Pleasant and within Reach of All — Importance of Reading — 
 Train the Judgment — Thought, 194 
 
 In what Self-culture consists — Necessity of Physical Culture — Neces- 
 sity of Mental Culture — Educating Influence of Every-day Life — Moral 
 Culture — Self-culture ever pressing its Claims, . • . . 201 
 
 Influence of Literature — Literature and Encouragement — Consola- 
 tion of Literature — Literature the Soul of Action — How to choose 
 Books — Influence of Reading on Personal Character — Power of the 
 Press, . 207 
 
 Intellectual Triumphs — How shown — What Necessary for its Attain- 
 ment — Best Results obtained by training All the Faculties — Obtained by 
 Years of Exertion, 211 
 
 gri^oJce of gorrt^iatxtcjtxg. 
 
 Influence of \ Associates — Character shown by the Company you 
 keep — No One can afford to associate with Bad Company — Power 
 
CONTENTS. 9 
 
 of Bad Associates to debase you — Persons whom Society has most to 
 fear — Why Evil Associates debase us — Influence of Good Company — 
 Rank in Society determined by Choice of Companions, . Page 216 
 
 Value of Friendship — Language of Friendship a Varied One — All 
 need Friends — Test of Friendship — Friendship a Tender Sentiment — 
 Poverty a Test of Friendship — Death of a Friendship — Old Friends, 223 
 
 ^otwc^r* of ^wgiorrt- 
 
 Power of Custom — Likes and Dislikes — Creatures of Custom — Habit 
 man's Best Friend or Worst Enemy — How Habits grow — Evil Habits 
 must be conquered — Importance of Good Habits — How to form Good 
 Habits ... 228 
 
 d\ 
 
 ucnct. 
 
 Nature of Influence — Influence Immortal — Solemn Thought — Every 
 Thing exerts Influence — Examples from Nature — Influence of Great 
 Men — Your Influence for Good or for Evil — Influence of Human 
 Actions — Duty of exerting a Good Influence — Responsibility for our 
 Influence, 236 
 
 Character a Great Motive Power — Value of Good Character — Char- 
 acter is Power — Difference between Character and Reputation — Charac- 
 ter of Slow Growth — Character our Own — Character always acting — 
 Character a Grand Thing, . 243 
 
 Value of Prudence — Difficulty of defining Prudence— The Tongue 
 of Prudence, 247 
 
 Beauty of Temperance — Danger of Impulse — Temperance and 
 Health — Temperance dwells in the Heart — Temperance consists in Self- 
 control — Must be Temperate to make the Most of Life, . . 252 
 
 In what Frugality consists — Frugality and Liberality — Frugality 
 necessary to Acquisition of Wealth — The Danger of going beyond the 
 Income — Influence of Economy on the Other Emotions, . .258 
 
10 CONTENTS. 
 
 g?aHettce» 
 
 Patience the Ballast of the Soul — Necessity of Patience — Examples 
 of Eminent Men — Patience an Element of Home Happiness, Page 264 
 
 gelf-gotii^ol. 
 
 Self-control a Form of Courage — Importance of Mental Faculties — 
 Government and Progress — Composure Highest Form of Power — Strong 
 Temper not always a Bad One— Man born for Dominion, . . 270 
 
 In what Courage consists — Courage not confined to the Battle- 
 field — Occasion for Courage in Domestic Life — Courage of Endurance 
 for Conscience's Sake, 275 
 
 @^***¥- 
 
 Charity like Dew from Heaven — Charity a Lovable Trait — The 
 Spirit of Charity always doing Good — Universal Charity — Death and 
 Charity, 279 
 
 g§£«d«e§§. 
 
 Kindness the Music of Good-will — Kindness makes Sunshine — 
 Should never feel ashamed of Kindness— Kindness not necessarily 
 shown in Gifts — Kindness shown in Little Things — Influence of Unno- 
 ticed Kindness— Showing Kindness a Noble Revenge— Kind Words 
 and their influence, 286 
 
 benevolence. 
 
 Doing Good a Happy Act— No Excess of Good Deeds— Benevo- 
 lence necessary to a Perfect Life — Liberality not Profuseness — Benevo- 
 lence during Life, .......••••■ • 291 
 
 Me^aetiii* 
 
 Truth always Consistent— Falsehood Perplexing— Strict Veracity 
 has regard to Looks and Actions— Lying a Cowardly Trait— Danger of 
 too close Adherence to Truth due to Lack of Caution, . . . 296 
 
 Honor a Glorious Trait of Character— Honor shown in Little Acts — 
 Honor and Virtue not the Same, 299 
 
CONTENTS. 11 
 
 Policy of the Nature of Cunning — Extent of this Principle — A Char- 
 acteristic Trait of the Age — Policy not Prudence or Caution — Policy not 
 Discretion — Danger of judging from Appearance, . . Page 303 
 
 Egotism a Disagreeable Trait — Egotism, how shown — Why we dis- 
 like Egotism in Others — Danger of Self-love — The True Line between 
 Egotism and Self-conceit, 306 
 
 Vanity requires Skill in the Management — Danger of Love of Ap- 
 plause — Vanity attacks Every Thing — Exception of Vanity — Vanity not 
 wholly Bad — Vanity ever present 311 
 
 Nature of Selfishness — Selfishness destructive of Happiness — Self- 
 ishness a Narrow Quality — Selfishness contracts the Mind — Selfishness 
 shows itself in Many Ways — Last Hours of a Selfish Life, . -314 
 
 Obstinacy a Trait of Low Minds — Peculiar Property of Obstinacy — 
 Obsrinacy a Barrier to Improvement — Obstinacy not Firmness — Neces- 
 sity of sometimes yielding — Be not in a Hurry to change Opinion, 318 
 
 Nature of Calumny — Slander never tired — Slander loved only by 
 the Base — Slander can not injure a Good Man — Slander easily started — 
 Your Own Character shown in describing Another's — Speak kindly of 
 the Absent, 323 
 
 Irritability an Unpleasant Quality — The Source of Envy and Dis- 
 content — Sin of fretting — Fretting easy to indulge — Evidence of a Moral 
 Weakness — Evidence of Littleness of Soul, . . . . . 328 
 
 Envy Born of Pride — Envy a Foolish Trait — Envy destroy' s One's 
 Own Happiness — Envy seeks to pull down Others — Envy Cruel in pur- 
 suit — Envy grows in All Hearts, 332 
 
12 CONTENTS. 
 
 A Discontented Man wretched — Discontent at Times wicked — Uni- 
 versality of Discontent — Contentment Felicity — Duty to enjoy God's 
 Blessing — Contentment abides with Little Things — Contentment not 
 Supine Satisfaction — Folly of Discontent, .... Page 337 
 
 Deceit an Obstacle to Happiness — Deceit in Friendship Most De- 
 testable — Deceit Inimical to Society — Deception and Hypocrisy — Decep- 
 tion assumes Many Forms, 341 
 
 A Busybody disliked by All — Allied to Envy and Slander — The 
 Source of Many Troubles — Mischief wrought by an Intermeddler — Be- 
 ware of Curiosity — A Meddler not moved by the Spirit of Charity, 345 
 
 Anger an Impotent Quality — Anger unmans a Man — Fit Occasions 
 for Indignation — Anger always Terrible or Ridiculous — Strong Temper 
 not of Necessity a Bad One, 349 
 
 Ambition a Deceptive Quality — Ambition fatal to Happiness — Am- 
 bition fa^tal to Friendship — Ambition a Shadowy Quality — Ambition not 
 Aspiration — Ambition an Excessive Quality — Ambitious of True Honor 
 a Grand Thing, . . . 353 
 
 Importance of Politeness — Manner influences Worldly Opinion — 
 Fascinating Manners not Politeness — Politeness does not depend on 
 National Peculiarities — Politeness is Kindness — Description of a Gentle- 
 man — Politeness comes of Sincerity — Politeness a Noble Trait of Char- 
 acter — Business Value of Politeness — Good Manners can not be laid 
 aside, • 360 
 
 g| o ctatxtl titjr _ 
 
 Mutual Intercourse necessary to Happiness — Society the Balm of 
 Life — Duty of doing Something for Society — All Social Duties Recip- 
 rocal — Society the Spirit of Life — Anomalies of Society explained — 
 Happy Influence of Society, . . . 367 
 
CONTENTS. 13 
 
 Dignity defined — Dignity not Dependent on Place — Dignity the 
 Ennobling Quality of Politeness — Three Kinds of Dignity — Dignity not 
 Conceit — Dignity not Hauteur and Pride, .... Page 371 
 
 Affability an Ornament — Affability of Value — Why Affability pro- 
 motes Success — Not well enough acquainted with Each Other — Duty 
 of cultivating Affability — Whom to be Affable with, . . .375 
 
 Dress denotes the Man — Duty of Dressing — Love of Beauty right — 
 Mental Qualities shown by the Toilet — Beauty of Simplicity — The Style 
 of Dress — Dress need not be Costly — Dress of a Gentleman — Dandies 
 Ridiculous, 382 
 
 gentlctegg. 
 
 Gentleness a Pleasing Quality — We do not sufficiently value Gen- 
 tleness — Power of Gentleness — Gentleness belongs to Virtue — Great 
 Power always Gentle in Expression — Power in Gentle Words — Founda- 
 tion of True Gentleness, . 287 
 
 Modesty a Mark of Wisdom — Modesty a Beautiful Setting to 
 Talents — All Great Events complete themselves in Silence — Modesty 
 not Bashfulness — Modesty Different from Reserve — Modesty Crowning 
 Ornament of Woman, . 391 
 
 Love a Ruling Element — Love a Need of the Heart — Power of 
 Love — Love a Proof of Moral Excellence — Love elevates Life — Duty to 
 study the Nature of Love — Love founded on Esteem and Respect — Love 
 Dependent on Etiquette — Woman's Love Stronger than Man's — Love 
 purifies the Heart, 400 
 
 Importance of the Question — Mistaken Notions as to Time — Court- 
 ship and Wedded Love — Happiness Dependent on Love — All Jest out 
 of Place — Duty of Careful Thought on Courtship — Marriage should be 
 
14 CONTENTS. 
 
 made a Study— Courtship a Voyage of Discovery — The True Companion 
 must be sought for — A Critical Point in a Woman's Life — Must be an 
 Equal— Courtship Beautiful, • Page 407 
 
 Marriage a Solemn Spectacle — Human Happiness ever accompa- 
 nied by Sorrow — Loving Trust of Woman — Importance of the Act — 
 Marriage the Entrance to a New World — Influence of a Wife's Moral 
 Character — Discipline of the Affections — Marriage a Necessity — Marriage 
 should be made a Study — Why Disappointments arise — Marriage a Real 
 and Earnest Affair, 415 
 
 Marriage universally expected — Happiness of Single Life — Matri- 
 mony brings Cares as well as Joys — Marriage not the Chief End of 
 Life — Marriage the More Preferable State — Jeremy Taylor's Contrast 
 of the Two States — Early Marriages Injudicious — Why Some remain 
 Single, 422 
 
 Marriage the Bond of Social Order — Influence of a Good Wife — 
 Nature of the Marriage Tie — Gold can not purchase Love — Unhappy 
 Marriages — Human to see the Good Side of Things past — Happiness 
 found in consulting the Happiness of Others — Elevating Influence of 
 Marriage, 429 
 
 g>«tfeg of glared gife. 
 
 Duty of Married Life can not be shaken off — Marriage does not 
 change Human Nature — Love not the Only r Requisite of Domestic 
 Felicity — Chance to make or mar Life — Danger from Familiarity — 
 Patience demanded — Must expect Imperfections — Must seek the Hap- 
 piness of Others — Duty of forgetting Self, ..... 436 
 
 Trials to be expected — Death of Wedded Love — Daily Life the 
 
 Test of Married Love — Domestic Happiness reached through Trials 
 
 Must learn to bear with the Faults of Each Other — Imperfections of 
 Character make the Strongest Claims on our Love — Many Trials arise 
 from Mistaken Notions as to Economy — Necessity of having a 
 Home, 442 
 
CONTENTS. 15 
 
 True Marriage the Growth of Years — There must be a Mutual 
 Self-sacrifice — Keep Faults to yourself — Constant Tenderness and Care 
 necessary — Proofs of Affection should be granted — Duty of Husbands — 
 Duty of Wives — Man desires Woman's Sympathy and Love — Wives 
 should consult Husbands' Taste, Page 448 
 
 Baseness of this Passion — Distinction between Jealousy and Envy — 
 Jealousy preferable to Envy — Jealousy assumes Many Forms — No One 
 willing to Acknowledge Jealousy — Jealousy a Deadly Thing — Suspicion 
 an Enemy to Happiness, . 453 
 
 Regret a Sad Word — All have felt it — The Profoundest Sorrows 
 self-wrought — Death an Occasion of Much Regret — Shadowed Lives — 
 How to escape regret, 457 
 
 Memory the Noblest Gift of Providence — Memory the Golden 
 Cord — Treasure of a Good Memory — Memory of Past Days — Slight 
 Things suffice to recall Past Memories — The Reminiscences of Youth — 
 Memory sometimes Painful — Memory crowds Years into Moments, 465 
 
 Hope accomplishes All Things — Moderate Hope Helpful — Sustain- 
 ing Power of Hope — Should only hope for Probable Things — Hope ever 
 with us — Hope lives in the Future — The Morality of Hope — A True 
 Hope ever Present — Hopes and Fears — Rise above Trouble, . 472 
 
 Prosperity the Test of Character — A Degree of Prosperity to be 
 reasonably hoped for — Continuous Prosperity not a Good Thing — How 
 to prosper — Prosperity and Happiness not Identical — Early Adversity 
 the Foundation of Future Prosperity — Hardships a Good Thing, . 476 
 
 Details Important — Trifles make Success — No Such Thing as Tri- 
 fles in Life — Trifles make the Difference between First and Second 
 
16 CONTENTS. 
 
 Class Work — Unhappiness of Life caused by Trifles — Trifles make an 
 Influence, Page 482 
 
 Spare Moments the Gold-dust of Time — Time our Estate — What 
 can be done in Leisure Time — Busiest Persons have always the Most 
 Time — Time can not be recalled — Effort required to employ Time 
 Rightly — Death teaches the Value of Time, . . . . . 487 
 
 Happiness the Principal Thing — Deceitfulness of Happiness — Hap- 
 piness like To-morrow — Wealth and Fame not Necessary to Happiness — 
 Can not control our Outward Surroundings— -Circumstances not essential 
 to Happiness — Disposition to enjoy Life what is wanted — Enjoy Present 
 Surroundings — Content is Happiness — Must seek for Happiness in the 
 Right Way, 494 
 
 True Nobility often counterfeited — Man not rated by his Posses- 
 sions — Greatness often Obscure — Some Great in Evil — Influence of 
 Noble Principles — True Nobility Modest in Expression — Nobility of 
 Character Reverential — True Nobility within Reach of All, . . 500 
 
 A Good Name the Richest Possession — Based on Permanent Ex- 
 cellence — The Result of Individual Exertion — Influence of Youth on 
 Life — Rewards of possessing a Good Name — Evil of being devoid 
 of it, 507 
 
 Meditation the Soul's Perspective Glass — Must learn to subdue the 
 Impulses — Meditation the Counselor of the Mental Powers — Guard 
 against Impure Thoughts — Duty of Thinking, . . . .511 
 
 Principles the Springs of our Actions — Danger of Loose Princi- 
 ples — Good Principles ever acting — False Principles, . . .516 
 
 Must Rightly use Small Opportunities— Opportunity and Ability — 
 All have a Few Opportunities — Must not wait for Opportunity, . 520 
 
CONTENTS. 17 
 
 Duty ever Present with us — Duty based on Justice — We must will to 
 do our Duty — Duty and Might — Duty does not fear Censure, Page 524 
 
 Life Full of Trials — Joy and Sorrow near together — Trials sent for 
 our Good — Wisdom won by Trials — Man' like a Sword— Never meet 
 Trouble Half Way — Sorrow should remind us of God, . . . 528 
 
 §«wgg. 
 
 Sickness draws us near to God — Sickness softens the Heart — Sick- 
 ness renders us All Equals — The Blessings of Sickness — Sickness and 
 Health — Discipline of a Sick-bed, 532 
 
 Sorrows gather around Great Souls — Sorrows make the Mind 
 Genial — Life abounds in Sorrowful Scenes— Sorrow the Noblest of Dis- 
 cipline — Christianity a Religion of Sorrow — Suffering must be patiently 
 submitted to — Sorrow sometimes too Sacred to be spoken of — Must not 
 give way to Causeless Sorrow, . . . . . . . 539 
 
 Sove€i V . 
 
 Poverty a Valued Discipline — Evils of Poverty Imaginary — Genius 
 a Gift of Poverty — The Advantages of struggling with Poverty — Poverty 
 the Test of Civility — Real Wants of Mankind but Few — Misfortune of 
 beginning Life Rich — Poverty of the Mind Most Deplorable, . 545 
 
 The Elasticity of the Human Mind— Affliction a School of Virtue — 
 Adversity the Touchstone of Character — The Uncertainty of Human 
 Life — Suffering Divinely appointed — Thought when Death comes, 551 
 
 Disappointments Divinely appointed — Disappointments the Lot of 
 Man — Shadowed Lives — Many disappointed because they do not look 
 for Happiness in the Right Way — Must meet Disappointments Bravely — 
 Must be accepted with Resignation — Disappointments sometimes arise 
 from Undue Expectations — Time disappoints our Cherished plans — Life 
 
 a Variegated Scene, 556 
 
 2 
 
18 CONTENTS. 
 
 atXitr'c. 
 
 Ultimate Success attained through Present Failure — Failures for 
 ouj- Own Good — The True Hero perseveres in Spite of Failure — Do not 
 give Way to Despair — No One succeeds in All his Undertakings — Many- 
 ruined by Early Success — How to view Past Mistakes^— Sorrows of 
 Mankind traced to Blighted Hopes — The Brave - hearted Man rises 
 Superior to Present Difficulties, Page 564 
 
 ontieti 
 
 c ¥- 
 
 Dark Hours as well as Bright Ones — Dire Effects 'of Despair — 
 Influence of Hope — Duty of resisting Despondency — Despondency a 
 Failure of Duty — To give Way to Despair not Manly — Lesson from 
 Nature — Causeless Depression of Spirits — Human Nature to see the 
 Dark Side, 570 
 
 Faith the Prophet of the Soul — Faith a Necessity — Faith a Reason- 
 able Thing — Faith ever with us — Difference between Morality and 
 Faith — Faith expands the Intellect — Must not judge the Outward Mani- 
 festations of Faith — Faith and Works, 575 
 
 Necessity of Prayer — Prayer arises from the Heart — Prayer and 
 Outward Action — Prayer the Password to Heaven — Family Worship — 
 Necessity of Daily Worship — Family Prayers knit together the Home — 
 We often pray Improperly — What God looketh at in Prayers — The 
 Lord's Prayer, 580 
 
 Religion binds Man to God — True Religion a Noble Thing — Effect 
 of Religion — Religion Full of Joys — Religion a Natural Thing — Religion 
 not established by Reason — Sorrow for Sin — Three Modes of bearing 
 Ills of Life — Surrounded by Motives to Religion — Religion a Refining 
 Influence — Religion teaches the Dignity of Common Life — Religion 
 enforces the doing of Common Duties, 587 
 
 fitod xtx SSTatwr^ 
 
 OS Gs 
 
 "The Heavens proclaim the Glory of God" — The Gospel written 
 on Nature — Distinguishing Features of God's Works — Study of Nature 
 
CONTENTS. 19 
 
 leads to True Religion — Plan running through Nature's Works — Won- 
 drous Natural Scenes conduce to a Proper View of God, . Page 592 
 
 Eulogy of the Bible — The Bible the Oldest Monument Extant— 
 The Bible Adapted to Every Condition — The Bible the Foundation of our 
 Religious Faith — The Bible our Constant Attendant — The Bible a Tried 
 Book — The Scriptures Adapted to All Times of Life — The Bible gives 
 us a Sure Foundation to stand upon, 596 
 
 Importance of this Question — Changes of the Seasons proving 
 Future Life — Men at All Times have pondered the Question of Death — 
 Tenable Ground for the Hope of Future Life — Visions on Death- 
 beds, 599 
 
 ggtme and gic*>«*i^_ 
 
 Insignificance of Man as compared to Eternity — The Hour-glass 
 Emblematical of the World — The Closing Year of Our Life — Transitory 
 Period of Human Life — The Vanities and Contentions of Life viewed 
 from the Stand-point of Eternity, 602 
 
 ffit* ggventwg of gSfe. 
 
 The Beauty of Age — Different Ages of Life contrasted — In the 
 Realities of Life we lose Sight of the Dreams of Youth — Age should 
 present the Grandest Thoughts — Age has no Terror to those who,see it 
 near — The True Man does not wish to be a Child again — Death the 
 Transition Stage to a More Glorious and Perfect Life — In Death we are 
 All Equal — Should Cultivate Cheerful Thoughts about Death — Poem on 
 Death, . . .608 
 
j^llpltl 
 
 illi 
 
 3k 
 
 E can conceive of no -spectacle better calcu- 
 lated to lead the mind to serious reflections 
 ^(llfc^ than that of an aged person, who has mis- 
 spent a long life, and who, when standing 
 near the end of life's journey, looks down 
 the long vista of his years, only to recall opportuni- 
 ties unimproved. Now that it is all too late, he can 
 plainly see where he passed by in heedless haste the 
 real "gems of life" in pursuit of the glittering gew- 
 gaws of pleasure, but which, when gained, like the 
 apples of Sodom, turned to ashes in his very grasp. 
 What a different course would he pursue would time 
 but turn backwards in his flight and he be allowed 
 to commence anew to weave the "tangled web of 
 life." But this is not vouchsafed him. Regrets are 
 useless, save when they awaken in the minds of 
 youth a wish to avoid errors and a desire to gather 
 only the true "jewels of life." 
 
22 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 Life, with its thousand voices wailing and exult- 
 ing, reproving and exalting, is calling upon you. 
 Arouse, and gird yourself for the race. Up and on- 
 ward, and 
 
 "Waking, 
 
 Be awake to sleep no more." 
 
 Not alone by its ultimate destiny, but by its im- 
 mediate obligations, uses, enjoyment, and advantages, 
 must be estimated the infinite and untold value of life. 
 It is a great mission on which you are sent. It is 
 the choicest gift in the bounty of heaven committed 
 to your wise and diligent keeping, and is associated 
 with countless benefits and priceless boons which 
 heaven alone has power to bestow. But, alas ! its 
 possibilities for woe are equal to those of weal. 
 
 It is a crowning triumph or a disastrous defeat, 
 garlands or chains, a prison or a prize. We need 
 the eloquence of Ulysses to plead in our behalf, the 
 arrows of Hercules to do battle on our side. It is 
 of the utmost importance to you to make the journey 
 of life a successful one. To do so you must begin 
 with right ideas. If you are mistaken in your pres- 
 ent estimates it is best to be undeceived at the first, 
 even though it cast a shadow on your brow. It is 
 true, that life is not mean, but it is grand. It is also 
 a real and earnest thing. It has homely details, 
 painful passages, and a crown of care for every brow. 
 
 We seek to inspire you with a wish and a will to 
 meet it with a brave spirit. We seek to point you 
 to its nobler meanings and its higher results. The 
 tinsel with which your imagination has invested it 
 
LIFE. 23 
 
 will all fall off of itself so soon as you have fairly 
 entered on its experience. So we say to you, take 
 up life's duties now, learn something of what life 
 is before you take upon yourself its great respon- 
 sibilities. 
 
 Great destinies lie shrouded in your swiftly pass- 
 ing hours ; great responsibilities stand in the pas- 
 sages of every-day life ; great dangers lie hidden in 
 the by-paths of life's great highway ; great uncertainty 
 hangs over your future history. God has given you 
 existence, with full power and opportunity to improve 
 it and be happy ; he has given you equal power to 
 despise the gift and be wretched; which you will do 
 is the great problem to be solved by your choice and 
 conduct. Your bliss or misery in two worlds hangs 
 pivoted in the balance. 
 
 With God and a wish to do right in human life 
 it becomes essentially a noble and beautiful thing. 
 Every youth should form at the outset of his career 
 the solemn purpose to make the most and the best 
 of the powers which God has given him, and to turn 
 to the best possible account every outward advantage 
 within his reach. This purpose must carry with it 
 the assent of the reason, the approval of the con- 
 science, the sober judgment of the intellect. It 
 should thus embody within itself whatever is vehe- 
 ment in desire, inspiring in hope, thrilling in en- 
 thusiasm, and intense in desperate resolve. To live 
 a life with such a purpose is a peerless privilege, 
 no matter at what cost of transient pain or unre- 
 mitting toil. 
 
24 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 It is a thing above professions, callings, and creeds. 
 It is a thing which brings to its nourishment all good, 
 and appropriates to its development of power all evil. 
 It is the greatest and best thing under the whole 
 heavens. Place can not enhance its honor; wealth 
 can not add to its value. Its course lies through 
 true manhood and womanhood ; through true father- 
 hood and motherhood ; through true friendship and 
 relationship of all legitimate kinds — of all natural 
 sorts whatever. It lies through sorrow and pain and 
 poverty and all earthly discipline. It lies through 
 unswerving trust in God and man. It lies through 
 patient and self-denying heroism. It lies through 
 all heaven prescribed and conscientious duty ; and it 
 leads as straight to heaven's brightest gate as the 
 path of a sunbeam leads to the bosom of a flower. 
 
 Many of you to-day are just starting on the du- 
 ties of active life. The volume of the future lies 
 unopened before you. Its covers are illuminated by 
 the pictures of fancy, and its edges are gleaming 
 with the golden tints of hope. Vainly you strive to 
 loosen its wondrous clasp ; 't is a task which none but 
 the hand of Time can accomplish. Life is before 
 you — not earthly life alone, but life ; a thread run- 
 ning interminably through the warp of eternity. It 
 is a sweet as well as a great and wondrous thing. 
 Man may make life what he pleases and give it as 
 much worth, both for himself and others, as he has 
 energy for. 
 
 The journey is a laborious one, and you must not 
 expect to find the road all smooth. And whether 
 
LIFE. 25 
 
 rich or poor, high or low, you will be disappointed if 
 you build on any other foundation. Take life like 
 a man ; take it just as though it was as it is — an 
 earnest, vital, essential affair. Take it just as though 
 you personally were born to the task of performing 
 a merry part in it — as though the world had waited 
 for your coming. Live for something, and for some- 
 thing worthy of life and its capabilities and oppor- 
 tunities, for noble deeds and achievements. Every- 
 man and every woman has his or her assignments in 
 the duties and responsibilities of daily life. We are 
 in the world to make the world better, to lift it up to 
 higher levels of enjoyment and progress, to make 
 the hearts and homes brighter and happier by de- 
 voting to our fellows our best thoughts, activities, 
 and influences. 
 
 It is the motto of every true heart and the genius 
 of every noble life that no man liveth to himself — lives 
 chiefly for his own selfish good. It is a law of our 
 intellectual and moral being that we promote our own 
 real happiness in the exact proportions we contribute 
 to the comfort and happiness of others. Nothing 
 worthy the name of happiness is the experience of 
 those who live only for themselves, all oblivious to 
 the welfare of their fellows. That only is the true 
 philosophy which recognizes and works out the prin- 
 ciple in daily life that — 
 
 "Life was lent for noble deeds." 
 
 Life embraces in its comprehensiveness a just re- 
 turn of failure and success as the result of individual 
 
26 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 perseverance and labor. Live for something definite 
 and practical ; take hold of things with a will, and 
 they will yield to you and become the ministers of 
 your own happiness and that of others. Nothing 
 within the realm of the possible can withstand the 
 man or woman who is intelligently bent on success. 
 Every person carries within the key that unlocks 
 either door of success or failure. Which shall it 
 be ? All desire success ; the problem of life is its 
 winning. 
 
 Strength, bravery, dexterity, and unfaltering nerve 
 and resolution must be the portion and attribute of 
 those who resolve to pursue fortune along the rugged 
 road of life. Their path will often lie amid rocks 
 and crags, and not on lawns and among lilies. A 
 great action is always preceded by a great purpose. 
 History and daily life are full of examples to show 
 us that the measure of human achievements has 
 always been proportional to the amount of human 
 daring and doing. Deal with questions and facts of 
 life as they really are. What can be done, and is 
 worth doing, do with dispatch ; what can not be done, 
 or would be worthless when done, leave for the idlers 
 and dreamers along life's highway. 
 
 Life often presents us with a choice of evils in- 
 stead of good ; and if any one would get through 
 life honorably and peacefully he must learn to bear 
 as well as forbear, to hold the temper in subjection 
 to the judgment, and to practice self-denial in small 
 as well as great things. Human life is a watch-tower. 
 It is the clear purpose of God that every one — the 
 
LIFE. 27 
 
 young especially — should take their stand on this 
 tower, to look, listen, learn, wherever they go and 
 wherever they tarry. Life is short, and yet for you 
 it may be long enough to lose your character, your 
 constitution, or your estate ; or, on the other hand, 
 by diligence you can accomplish much within its 
 limits. 
 
 If the sculptor's chisel can make impressions 
 on marble in a few hours which distant eyes shall 
 read and admire, if the man of genius can create 
 work in life that shall speak the triumph of mind a 
 thousand years hence, then may true men and women, 
 alive to the duty and obligations of existence, do in- 
 finitely more. Working on human hearts and desti- 
 nies, it is their prerogative to do imperishable work, 
 to build within life's fleeting hours monuments that 
 shall last forever. If such grand possibilities lie 
 within the reach of our personal actions in the world 
 how important that we live for something every hour 
 of our existence, and for something that is harmonious 
 with the dignity of our present being and the grand- 
 eur of our future destiny ! 
 
 A steady aim, with a strong arm, willing hands, 
 and a resolute will, are the necessary requisites to 
 the conflict which begins anew each day and writes 
 upon the scroll of yesterday the actions that form 
 one mighty column wherefrom true worth is esti- 
 mated. One day's work left undone causes a break 
 in the great chain that years of toil may not be able 
 to repair. Yesterday was ours, but it is gone; to- 
 day is all we possess, for to-morrow we may never 
 
28 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 see; therefore, in the golden hour of the present 
 the seeds are planted whereby the harvest for good 
 or evil is to be reaped. 
 
 To endure with cheerfulness, hoping for little, 
 asking for much, is, perhaps, the true plan. Decide 
 at once upon a noble purpose, then take it up 
 bravely, bear it off joyfully, lay it down triumphantly. 
 Be industrious, be frugal, be honest, deal with kind- 
 ness with all who come in your way, and if you do 
 not prosper as rapidly as you would wish depend 
 upon it you will be happy. 
 
 The web of life is drawn into the loom 1 for us, 
 but we weave it ourselves. We throw our own shut- 
 tle and work our own treadle. The warp is given 
 us, but the woof we furnish — find our own materials, 
 and color and figure it to suit ourselves. Every man 
 is the architect of his own house, his own temple of 
 fame. If he builds one great, glorious, and honora- 
 ble, the merit and the bliss are his ; if he rears a 
 polluted, unsightly, vice-haunted den, to himself the 
 shame and misery belongs. 
 
 Life is often but a bitter struggle from first to 
 last with many who wear smiling faces and are ever 
 ready with a cheerful word, when there is scarcely a 
 shred left of the hopes and opportunities which for 
 years promised happiness and content. But it is 
 human still to strive and yearn and grope for some 
 unknown good that shall send all unrest and troubles 
 to the winds and settle down over one's life with a 
 halo of peace and satisfaction. The rainbow of hope 
 is always visible in the future. Life is like a wind- 
 
HOME. 29 
 
 ing lane — on either side bright flowers and tempting 
 fruits, which we scarcely pause to admire or taste, 
 so eager are we to pass to an opening in the dis- 
 tance, which we imagine will be more beautiful; but, 
 alas ! we find we have only hastened by these tempt- 
 ing scenes to arrive at a desert waste. 
 
 We creep into childhood, bound into youth, sober 
 into manhood, and totter into old age. But through 
 all let us so live that when in the evening of life the 
 golden clouds rest sweetly and invitingly upon the 
 golden mountains, and the light of heaven streams 
 down through the gathering mists of death, we may 
 have a peaceful and joyous entrance into that world 
 of blessedness, where the great riddle of life, whose 
 meaning we can only guess at here below, will be 
 unfolded to us in the quick consciousness of a soul 
 redeemed and purified. 
 
 " Home is the resort 
 Of love, of joy, of peace and plenty, where, 
 Supporting and supported, polished friends 
 And dear relations mingle into bliss." 
 
 fvlpOME! That word touches every fiber of the 
 $j$k soul, and strikes every chord of the human 
 'y heart with its angelic fingers. Nothing but 
 death can break its spell. What tender as- 
 sociations are linked with home ! What pleasing 
 
30 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 images and deep emotions it awakens ! It calls up 
 the fondest memories of life, and opens in our nature 
 the purest, deepest, richest gush of consecrated 
 thought and feeling. 
 
 To the little child, home is his world — he knows 
 no other. The father's love, the mother's smile, the 
 sister's embrace, the brother's welcome, throw about 
 his home a heavenly halo, and make it as attractive 
 to him as the home of angels. Home is the spot 
 where the child pours out all his complaint, and it is 
 the grave of all his sorrows. Childhood has its sor- 
 rows and its grievances ; but home is the place where 
 these are soothed and banished by the sweet lullaby 
 of a fond mother's voice. 
 
 Ask the man of mature years, whose brow is fur- 
 rowed by care, whose mind is engrossed in business, — 
 ask him what is home. He will tell you: "It is a 
 place of rest, a haven of content, where loved ones 
 relieve him of the burden of every-day life, too heavy 
 to be continuously borne, from whence, refreshed and 
 invigorated, he goes forth to do battle again." 
 
 Ask the lone wanderer as he plods his weary 
 way, bent with the weight of years and white with 
 the frosts of age, — ask him what is home. He will 
 tell you: "It is a green spot in memory, an oasis in 
 the desert, a center about which the fondest recollec- 
 tion of his grief-oppressed heart clings with all the 
 tenacity of youth's first love. It was once a glorious, 
 a happy reality; but now it rests only as an image 
 of the mind." 
 
 Wherever the heart wanders it carries the thought 
 
HOME. 31 
 
 of home with it. Wherever by the rivers of Babylon 
 the heart feels its loss and loneliness, it hangs its 
 harp upon the willows, and weeps. It prefers home 
 to its chief joy. It will never forget it ; for there 
 swelled its first throb, there were developed its first 
 affections. There a mother's eye looked into it, there 
 a father's prayer blessed it, there the love of parents 
 and brothers and sisters gave it precious entertain- 
 ment. There bubbled up, from unseen fountains, 
 life's first effervescing hopes. There life took form 
 and consistence. From that center went out all its 
 young ambition. Towards that focus return its con- 
 centrating memories. There it took form and fitted 
 itself to loving natures ; and it will carry that impress 
 wherever it may go, unless it becomes polluted by 
 sin or makes to itself another home sanctified by a 
 new and more precious affection. 
 
 There is one vision that never fades from the 
 soul, and that is the vision of mother and of home. 
 No man in all his weary wanderings ever goes out 
 beyond the overshadowing arch of home. Let him 
 stand on the surf-beaten coast of the Atlantic, or 
 roam over western wilds, and every dash of the wave 
 or murmur of the breeze will whisper home, sweet 
 home ! Let him down amid the glaciers of the north, 
 and even there thoughts of home, too warm to be 
 chilled by the eternal frosts, will float in upon him. 
 Let him rove through the green, waving groves and 
 over the sunny slopes of the south, and in the smile 
 of the soft skies, and in the kiss of the balmy breeze, 
 home will live again. Let prosperity reward his every 
 
32 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 exertion, and wealth and affluence bring round him 
 all the luxury of the earth, yet in his marble palace 
 will rise unforbidden the vision of his childhood's 
 home. Let misfortune overtake him ; let poverty be 
 his portion, and hunger press him ; still in troubled 
 dreams will his thoughts revert to his olden home. 
 
 If you wanted to gather up all tender memories, 
 all lights and shadows of the heart, all banquetings 
 and reunions, all filial, fraternal, paternal, conjugal 
 affections, and had only just four letters to spell out 
 all height and depth, and length and breadth, and 
 magnitude and eternity of meaning, you would write 
 it all out with the four letters that spell Home. 
 
 What beautiful and tender associations cluster 
 thick around that word ! Compared with it, wealth, 
 mansion, palace, are cold, heartless* terms. But 
 home, — that word quickens every pulse, warms the 
 heart, stirs the soul to its depths, makes age feel 
 young again, rouses apathy into energy, sustains the 
 sailor in his midnight watch, inspires the soldier with 
 courage on the field of battle, and imparts patient 
 endurance to the worn-out sons of toil. 
 
 The thought of it has proved a sevenfold shield 
 to virtue ; the very name of it has a spell to call back 
 the wanderer from the path of vice ; and, far away 
 where myrtles bloom and palm-trees wave, and the 
 ocean sleeps upon coral strands, to the exile's fond 
 fancy it clothes the naked rock, or stormy shore, 
 or barren moor, or wild height and mountain, with 
 charms he weeps to think of, and longs once more 
 to see. 
 
HOME. GO 
 
 Every home should be as a city set on a hill, that 
 can not be hid. Into it should flock friends and 
 friendship, bringing the light of the world, the stim- 
 ulus and the modifying power of contact with various 
 natures, the fresh flowers of feeling gathered from 
 wide fields. Out of it should flow benign charities, 
 pleasant amenities, and all those influences which 
 are the natural offspring of a high and harmonious 
 home-life. 
 
 The home is the fountain of civilization. Our 
 laws are made in the home. The things said there 
 give bias to character far more than do sermons and 
 lectures, newspapers and books. No other audience 
 are so susceptible and receptive as those gathered 
 about the table and fireside ; no other teachers have 
 the acknowledged and divine right to instruct that is 
 granted without challenge to parents. The founda- 
 tion of our national life is under their hand. They 
 can make it send forth waters bitter or sweet, for the 
 death or the healing of the people. 
 
 The influences of home perpetuate themselves. 
 The gentle graces of the mother live in the daughter 
 long after her head is pillowed in the dust of death ; 
 and the fatherly kindness finds its echoes in the 
 nobility and character of sons who come to wear his 
 mantle and fill his place. While, on the other hand, 
 from an unhappy, misgoverned, and ill-ordered home, 
 go forth persons who shall make other homes miser- 
 able, and perpetuate the sorrows and sadness, the 
 contentions and strifes, which have made their own 
 early lives miserable. In every proper sense in which 
 
34 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 home can be considered, it is a powerful stimulant to 
 noble actions and a high and pure morality. So val- 
 uable is this love of home that every man should 
 cherish it as the apple of his eye. As he values his 
 own moral worth, as he prizes his country, the peace 
 and happiness of the world ; yea, more, as he values 
 the immortal interests of man, he should cherish and 
 cultivate a strong and abiding love of home. 
 
 Home has voices of experience and hearts of gen- 
 uine holy love, to instruct you in the way of life, and 
 to save you from a sense of loneliness as you grad- 
 ually discover the selfishness of mankind. Home has 
 its trials, in which are imaged forth the stern struggles 
 of your after years, that your character may gain 
 strength and manifestation, for which purpose they 
 are necessary ; they open the portals of his heart, 
 that the jewels otherwise concealed in its hidden 
 depths may shine forth and shed their luster on the 
 world. Home has its duties, to teach you how to 
 act on your own responsibilities. Home gradually 
 and greatly increases its burdens, so that you may 
 acquire strength to endure without being overtasked. 
 Home is a little world, in which the duties of the 
 great world are daily rehearsed. 
 
 He who has no home has not the sweetest pleas- 
 ures of life. He feels not the thousand endearments 
 that cluster around that hallowed spot, to fill the 
 void of his aching heart, and while away his leisure 
 moments in the sweetest of life's enjoyments. Is 
 misfortune your lot, you will find a friendly welcome 
 from hearts beating true to your own. The chosen 
 
HOME. 35 
 
 partner of your toil has a smile of approbation when 
 others have deserted you, a hand of hope when all 
 others refuse, and a heart to feel your sorrows as 
 her own. No matter how humble that home may be, 
 how destitute its stores, or how poorly its inmates 
 may be clad, if true hearts dwell there, it is still a 
 home. 
 
 Of all places on earth, home is the most delicate 
 and sensitive. Its springs of action are subtle and 
 secret. Its chords move with a breath. Its fires are 
 kindled with a spark. Its flowers are bruised with 
 the least rudeness. The influences of our homes 
 strike so directly on our hearts that they make sharp 
 impressions. In our intercourse with the world we 
 are barricaded, and the arrows let fly at our hearts 
 are warded off; but not so with us at home. Here 
 our hearts wear no covering, no armor. Every arrow 
 strikes them ; every cold wind blows full upon them ; 
 every storm beats against them. What, in the world, 
 we would pass by in sport, in our homes would wound 
 us to the quick. Very little can we bear at home, for 
 it is a sensitive place. 
 
 If we would have a true home, we must guard 
 well our thoughts and actions. A single bitter word 
 may disquiet the home for a whole day ; but, like 
 unexpected flowers which spring up along our path 
 full of freshness, fragrance, and beauty, so do kind 
 words and gentle acts and sweet disposition make 
 glad the home where peace and blessing dwell. No 
 matter how humble the abode, if it be thus garnished 
 with grace and sweetened by kindness and smiles, 
 
36 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE, 
 
 the heart will turn lovingly towards it from all the 
 tumults of the world, and home, "be it ever so 
 humble," will be the dearest spot under the sun. 
 
 There is no happiness in life, there is no misery, 
 like that growing out of the disposition which con- 
 secrates or desecrates a home. " He is happiest, 
 be he king or peasant, who finds peace at home." 
 Home should be made so truly home that the weary, 
 tempted heart could turn towards it anywhere on 
 the dusty highways of life, and receive light and 
 strength. It should be the sacred refuge of our lives, 
 whether rich or poor. 
 
 The affections and loves of home are graceful 
 things, especially among the poor. The ties that 
 bind the wealthy and proud to home may be forged 
 on earth, but those which link the poor man to his 
 humble hearth are of the true metal, and bear the 
 stamp of heaven. These affections and loves consti- 
 tute the poetry of human life, and so far as our 
 present existence is concerned, with all the domestic 
 relations, are worth more than all other social ties. 
 They give the first throb to the heart, and unseal the 
 deep fountains of its love. Homes are not made up 
 of material things. It is not a fine house, rich fur- 
 niture, a luxurious table, a flowery garden, and a 
 superb carriage, that make a home. Vastly superior 
 to this is a true home. Our ideal homes should be 
 heart-homes, in which virtue lives and love-flowers 
 bloom and peace-offerings are daily brought to its 
 altars. It is made radiant within with every social 
 virtue, and beautiful without by those simple adorn- 
 
HOME. 37 
 
 ments with which nature is every-where so prolific. 
 The children born in such homes will leave them with 
 regret, and come back to them in after life as pilgrims 
 to a holy shrine. The towns on whose hills and in 
 whose vales such homes are found will live forever in 
 the hearts of its grateful children. 
 
 How easy it is to invest homes with true elegance, 
 which resides not with the upholsterer or draper ! It 
 exists in the spirit presiding over the apartments of 
 the dwelling. Contentment must be always most 
 graceful ; it sheds serenity over the scenes of its 
 abode, it transforms a waste into a garden. The 
 house lighted by those imitations of a nobler and 
 brighter life may be wanting much which the discon- 
 tented may desire, but to its inhabitants it will be a 
 palace far outvying the Oriental in beauty. 
 
 There is music in the word Home. To the old it 
 brings a bewitching strain from the harp of memory, 
 to the middle-aged it brings up happy thoughts, 
 while to the young it is a reminder of all that is near 
 and dear to them. Our hearts turn with unchange- 
 able love and longing to the dear old home which 
 sheltered us in childhood. Kind friends may beckon 
 us to newer scenes, and loving hearts may bind us 
 fast to other pleasant homes ; but we love to return 
 to the home of our childhood. It may be old and 
 rickety to the eyes of strangers ; the windows may 
 have been broken and patched long ago, and the 
 floor worn through ; but it is still the old home from 
 out of which we looked at life with hearts full of 
 hope, building castles which faded long ago. Here 
 
38 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 we watched life come and go ; here we folded still, 
 cold hands over hearts as still, that once beat full 
 of love for us. 
 
 Even as the sunbeam is composed of millions of 
 minute rays, the home-life must be constituted of 
 little tendernesses, kind looks, sweet laughter, gentle 
 words, loving counsels. It must not be like the torch 
 blaze of natural excitement, which is easily quenched, 
 but like the serene, chastened light, which burns as 
 safely in the dry east wind as in the stillest atmos- 
 phere. Let each bear the other's burden the while ; 
 let each cultivate the mutual confidence which is a 
 gift capable of increase and improvement, and soon 
 it will be found that kindness will spring up on every 
 side, displacing unsuitability, want of mutual knowl- 
 edge, even as we have seen sweet violets and prim- 
 roses dispelling the gloom of the gray sea-rocks. 
 
 The sweetest type of heaven is home. Nay, 
 heaven itself is the home for whose acquisition we 
 are to strive most strongly. Home in qne form or 
 another is the great object of life. It stands at the 
 end of every day's labor, and beckons us to its 
 bosom ; and life would be cheerless and meaningless 
 did we not discern across the river that divides it 
 from the life beyond glimpses of the pleasant man- 
 sions prepared for us. Yes, heaven is the home 
 towards which those who have lived aright direct 
 their steps when wearied by the toils of life. There 
 the members of the homes on earth, separated here, 
 will meet again, to part no more. 
 
HOME CIRCLE. 39 
 
 flppHE home circle may be, ought to be, the most 
 ^Ip delightful place on earth, the center of the 
 4% purest affections and most desirable associa- 
 tions, as well as of the most attractive and 
 exalted beauties to be found this side of paradise. 
 Nothing can excel in beauty and sublimity the qui- 
 etude, peace, harmony, affection, and happiness of a 
 well-ordered family, where virtue is nurtured and 
 every good principle fostered and sustained. 
 
 The home circle is the nursery of affection. It 
 is the Eden of young attachments, and here should 
 be planted and tended all the germs of love, every 
 seed that shall ever sprout in the heart; and how 
 carefully should they be tended ! how guarded against 
 the frosts of jealousy, anger, envy, pride, vanity, and 
 ambition ! how rooted in the best soil of the heart, 
 and nourished and cultivated by the soul's best hus- 
 bandry ! 
 
 Here is the heart's garden. Its sunshine and 
 flowers are here. All its beautiful, all its lovely 
 things are here. And here should be expended care, 
 toil, effort, patience, and whatever may be necessary 
 to make them still more lovely. It is around the 
 memories of the home circle that cluster the happiest 
 and sometimes the saddest of the recollections of 
 youth. There is the thought of brother and sister, 
 perhaps now gone forever; of childish sorrow and 
 grief; of the mother's prayer and the father's bless- 
 
40 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 ing. Do you wonder that these memories, both bit- 
 ter and sweet, linger in the chambers of the mind 
 long after those of the busy years of maturity have 
 faded away before the approach of age? With what 
 assiduity ought all who have arrived at the years of 
 maturity strive to make their homes pleasant — and 
 especially is this true of parents — so that its mem- 
 bers when they go from thence will carry with them 
 thoughts that through all the weary years that are 
 before them will afford a pleasant retreat for them 
 when well-nigh wearied with the care which comes 
 with increasing years. 
 
 We can not honor with too deep a reverence the 
 home affections ; we can not cultivate them with too 
 great a care ; we can not cherish them with too much 
 solicitude. There is the center of our present hap- 
 piness, the springs of our deepest and strongest tides 
 of joy. When the home affections are duly cultivated 
 all others follow or grow out of them as a natural 
 consequence. If any would have fervent and noble 
 affections, such as give power and glory to the hu- 
 man heart, such as sanctify the soul and make it 
 supremely beautiful, such as an angel might covet 
 without shame, let him cultivate all the feelings that 
 originate, as from a radiant point, in the home circle. 
 
 The true flower of home love requires for its 
 development the aid of every member of the home 
 circle. The tears of sympathy as well as the sun- 
 shine of domestic affection bring it to its glorious 
 maturity. Ofttimes there are families the members 
 of which are, without doubt, dear to each other. If 
 
HOME CIRCLE. 41 
 
 sickness or sudden trouble fall on One all are afflicted, 
 and make haste to help and sympathize and comfort. 
 But in their daily life and ordinary intercourse there 
 is not only no expression of affection, none of the 
 pleasant and fond behavior that has, perhaps, little 
 dignity, but which more than makes up for that in 
 its sweetness, but there is an absolute hardness of 
 language and actions which is shocking to every 
 sensitive and tender feeling. Between father and 
 mother, brother and sister, ofttimes pass rough and 
 hasty words, and sometimes angry words, even more 
 frequently than words of endearment. To judge 
 from their actions they do not appear to love each 
 other, nor does it seem to have occurred to them 
 that it is their duty, as it should be their best pleas- 
 ure, to do and say all that they possibly can for each 
 other's good and happinesss. 
 
 It is in the home circle where we form many, if 
 not the most, of our habits, both of action and 
 speech. These habits we carry into the world. 
 They cling to us. The vulgarities which we use at 
 home we shall use abroad — the coarse sayings, the 
 low jest, the vulgar speeches, the grammatical blun- 
 ders. All the lingual imperfections which go to form 
 a part of our home conversation will enter into our 
 conversation at all times and in all places. The 
 home circle should be held too sacred to be polluted 
 with the vulgarities of languages, which could have 
 originated nowhere but in low and groveling minds. 
 It should be dedicated to love and truth, to all that 
 is tender in feeling and noble and pure in thought, 
 
42 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 to holiest communion of soul with soul. In order 
 that such a communion may be enjoyed it is requi- 
 site that language should there perform its most 
 sacred office, even the office of transmitting unim- 
 pared the most tender and sacred affections that glow 
 in the human heart. 
 
 If the dialects of angels could be used on earth its 
 fittest place would be the home circle. The language 
 of home should be such as would not stain the pur- 
 est lips nor fall harshly on the most refined ear. It 
 should abound in words of wisdom which are at once 
 the glory of youth and the honor of age. 
 
 The home circle, what tender associations does it 
 recall ! How deeply interwoven are its golden fila- 
 ments with all the fiber of our affectionate natures, 
 forming the glittering of the heart's golden life! 
 Here are father, mother, child, brother, sister, com- 
 panions, all the heart loves, all that makes earth 
 lovely, all that enriches the mind with faith and the 
 soul with hope. What language is most fitting for 
 home use, to bear the messages of home feeling, to 
 be freighted with the diamond treasure of home 
 hearts? Should it be any other than the most re- 
 fined and pure ? any other than that breathing the 
 sacred charity of affection? 
 
 Home is the great seeding-place of every affec- 
 tion that ever grows in the heart. Hence all should 
 tend well to it, watch, prune, and cultivate with all 
 prudence and wisdom, with all fervency of spirit. 
 Let the music of the heart swell its notes here in 
 one perpetual anthem of good will. Let praise and 
 
HOME CIRCLE. 43 
 
 prayer and fervent good wishes and words and works 
 hallow its sacred shrine. Let offices of love go 
 round like smiles at a feast of joy. Let the whole 
 soul devote its energies to making happy its home, 
 and its rewards will be great. 
 
 If there be any tie formed in life which ought to 
 be securely guarded from any thing which can put it 
 in peril it is that which unites the members of a 
 family. If there be a spot upon earth from which 
 discord and strife should be banished it is the fireside. 
 There center the fondest hopes and the most tender 
 affections. 
 
 The great lever by which the heart is moved is 
 love ; it is the basis of all true excellence, of all ex- 
 cellent thought. How pleasing the spectacle of that 
 home circle which is governed by the spirit of love! 
 Each one strives to avoid giving offense, and is stu- 
 diously considerate of the others' happiness. Sweet, 
 loving dispositions are cultivated by all, and each 
 tries to surpass the other in his efforts for the com- 
 mon harmony. Each heart glows with love, and the 
 benediction of heavenly peace seems to abide upon 
 that dwelling with such power that no storm of pas- 
 sion is able to rise. 
 
 There is no pleasanter sight than that of a family 
 of young folks who are quick to perform little acts 
 of attention towards their elders. The placing of the 
 big arm-chair for the mother, or kindly errands done 
 for father, and scores of little deeds, show the tender 
 sympathy of gentle, loving hearts. Parents should 
 show their appreciation of these kindly acts. If they 
 
44 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 do not indicate that they are appreciated the habit is 
 soon dropped. 
 
 Little children are imitative creatures, and quickly 
 catch the spirit surrounding them. So, if the father 
 shows kindly attention to the mother, bright eyes will 
 see the act, and quick minds will make a note of it. 
 By example much more than by precept can chil- 
 dren be taught to speak kindly to each other, to 
 acknowledge favors, to be gentle and unselfish, to 
 be thoughtful and considerate of the comfort of the 
 family. 
 
 The boys, with inward pride of the father's court- 
 eous demeanor, will be chivalrous and helpful to 
 their sisters ; and the girls, imitating the mother, will 
 be patient and gentle, even when brothers are noisy 
 and heedless. 
 
 In the homes where true courtesy prevails it seems 
 to meet you on the threshold. You feel the kindly 
 welcome on entering. No angry voices are heard 
 up stairs, no sullen children are sent from the room, 
 no peremptory orders are given to cover the delin- 
 quencies of housekeeping or servants. A delightful 
 atmosphere pervades the house, unmistakable, yet 
 * indescribable. Such a house, filled by the spirit of 
 love, is a home, indeed, to all who enter within its 
 consecrated walls. 
 
 Members of the home circle lose nothing by mu- 
 tual politeness ; on the contrary, by maintaining not 
 only its forms, but by inward cultivation of its spirit, 
 they become contributors to that domestic feeling 
 which is in itself a foretaste of heaven. The good- 
 
HOME CIRCLE. 45 
 
 night and the good-morning- salutation, though they 
 may seem but trifles, have a sweet and softening 
 influence on all its members. The little kiss and 
 artless good-night of the smaller ones, as they retire' 
 to rest, have in them a heavenly melody. 
 
 Children are the pride and ornament of the fam- 
 ily circle. They create sport and amusement and 
 dissipate all sense of loneliness from the household. 
 When intelligent and well trained they afford a 
 spectacle which even indifferent persons contemplate 
 with satisfaction and delight. Still these pleasura- 
 ble emotions are not unalloyed with solicitude. It 
 is an agreeable but changeable picture of human 
 happiness. Time in advancing carries them for- 
 ward, and erelong they will feel like exclaiming, 
 with the older and more sad and serious ones 
 around them, that their youth exists only in re- 
 membrance. 
 
 There is probably not an unpolluted man or 
 woman living who does not feel that the sweetest 
 consolations and best rewards of life are found in 
 the loves and delights of home. There are very 
 few who do not feel themselves indebted to the influ- 
 ence that clustered around their cradles for what- 
 ever good there may be in their character and con- 
 dition. The influence preceding from the home circle 
 is either a blessing or a curse, either for good or for 
 evil. It can not be neutral. In either case it is 
 mighty, commencing with our birth, going with us 
 through life, clinging to us in death, and reaching 
 into the eternal world. It is that unitive power which 
 
46 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 arises out of the manifold relations and associations 
 of domestic life. The specific influence of husband 
 and wife, of parent and child, of brother and sister, 
 of teacher and pupil, united and harmoniously blended, 
 constitute the home influence. From this we may 
 infer the character of home influence. It is great, 
 silent, irresistible, and permanent. Like the calm, 
 deep stream, it moves on in silent but overwhelming 
 power. It strikes root deep into the human heart, 
 and spreads its branches wide over our whole being. 
 Like the lily that braves the tempest, and the ' 'Alpine 
 flower that leans its cheek on the bosom of eternal 
 snow," it is exerted amid the wildest scenes of life, 
 and breathes a softening spell in our bosom, even 
 when a heartless world is freezing up the fountains 
 of our sympathy and love. It is governing, restrain- 
 ing, attracting, and traditional. It holds the empire 
 of the heart and rules the life. It restrains the way- 
 ward passions of the child and checks the man in his 
 mad career of ruin. 
 
 But all pictures of earthly happiness are transient 
 in duration. Where can you find an unbroken home 
 circle ? The time must soon come, if it has not al- 
 ready, when you must part from those who have sur- 
 rounded the same parental board, who mingled with 
 you in the gay-hearted joys of childhood and the 
 opening promise of youth. New cares will attend 
 you in new situations, and the relations you form 
 and the business you pursue may call you far from 
 the "play-place" of your youth. In the unseen 
 future your brothers and sisters may be sundered 
 
"FATHER AND MOTHER." 47 
 
 from you, your lives may be spent apart, and in 
 death you may be divided ; and of you it may be 
 said : 
 
 "They grew in beauty side by side. 
 They filled one home with glee; 
 Their graves are severed far and wide, 
 By mount and stream and sea." 
 
 sffe 
 
 OW can children repay parents for their watch- 
 ings, anxieties, labors, toils, trials, patience, and 
 love ? Think of the utter helplessness of the 
 long years of infancy, of the entire dependence 
 of succeeding childhood, of the necessities and wants 
 of youth, of the burning solicitude of parents, and 
 their deep and inexhaustible love ; think of the long 
 years of unwearied toil, of their deep and soul-felt 
 devotion to the interests of their offspring, of the 
 majesty and matchless power of their unselfish affec- 
 tions — and then say whether it is possible for youth 
 to repay too much love and gratitude for all this 
 bestowal of parental anxiety. 
 
 Oh, what thankfulness should fill every child's 
 heart ! What a glorious return of love ! Every day 
 should they give them some token of love. Every 
 hour should their own hearts glow with gratitude and 
 holy respect for those who have given them being, 
 and loved them so fervently and long. Nothing will 
 so warm and quicken all the affections of the parent's 
 
48 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 heart as such respect. Who feels like trusting an 
 ungrateful child ? Who can believe that his affection 
 for any object can be firm and pure ? The child who 
 has loved long and well his parents has thoroughly 
 electrified his affections, has surcharged them with 
 the sweet spirit of an affectionate tenderness, which 
 will pervade his entire heart, and will make him better 
 and purer forever. The affections of such a child are 
 to be trusted. As well may one doubt an angel as 
 such a one. 
 
 There is always a liability, where sons and daugh- 
 ters have gone from the home of their childhood, and 
 have formed homes of their own, gradually to lose 
 the old attachments and cease to pay those attentions 
 to parents which were so easy and natural in the 
 olden time. New associations, new thoughts, new 
 cares, all come in, filling the mind and heart, and, if 
 special pains be not taken, they thrust out the old 
 love. This ought never to be. Children should re- 
 member that the change is in them, and not with 
 those they left behind. They have every thing that 
 is new, much that is attractive in the present and 
 bright in the future ; but the parents' hearts cling to 
 the past, and have most in memory. When children 
 go away, they know not, and never will know until 
 they experience it themselves, what it cost to give 
 them up, nor what a vacancy they left behind. 
 
 The parents have not, if the children have, any 
 new loves to take the place of the old. Do not, 
 then, heartlessly deprive them of what you still can 
 give of attention and love. If you live in the same 
 
« FATHER AND MOTHER." 49 
 
 place, let your step be — if possible, daily- a familiar 
 one in the old home. Even when many miles away, 
 make it your business to go to your parents. In 
 this matter do not regard time or expense. They 
 are well spent ; and some day when the word reaches 
 you, flashed over the wires, that your father or mother 
 is gone, you will not regret then the many hours of 
 travel spent in going to them while they were yet 
 alive. 
 
 Keep up your intercourse with your parents. Do 
 not deem it sufficient to write only when something 
 important is to be told. Do not believe that to them 
 M no news is good news." If it be but a few lines, 
 write them. Write, if it be only to say, " I am 
 well ;" if it be only to send the salutation which says 
 they are '- dear," or the farewell which tells them that 
 you are " affectionate " still. These little messages 
 will be like caskets of jewels, and the tear that falls 
 fondly over them will be treasures for you. Let 
 every child, having any pretense to heart, or manli- 
 ness, or piety, and who is so fortunate as to have a 
 father or mother living, consider it a sacred duty to 
 consult, at any reasonable personal sacrifice, the 
 known wishes of such a parent until that parent is 
 no more ; and, our word for it, the recollections of 
 the same through the after pilgrimage of life will 
 sweeten every sorrow, will brighten every gladness, 
 will sparkle every tear-drop with a joy ineffable. 
 
 There is no period of life when our parents do 
 not claim our attention, love, and warmest affections. 
 
 From youth to manhood, from middle age to riper 
 
 4' 
 
50 GOLDEN OEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 years, if our honored parents survive, it should be 
 our constant study how we can best promote their 
 welfare and happiness, and smooth the pillow of their 
 declining years. 
 
 Nothing better recommends an individual than his 
 attentions to his parents. There are some children 
 whose highest ambition seems to be the promotion 
 of their parents* interest. They watch over them 
 with unwearied care, supply all their wants, and by 
 their devotion and kindness remove all care and sor- 
 row from their hearts. On the contrary, there are 
 others who seem never to bestow a thought upon 
 their parents, and to care but little whether they are 
 comfortably situated or not. By their conduct they 
 increase their cares, embitter their lives, and bring 
 their gray hairs with sorrow to the grave. Selfish- 
 ness has steeled their hearts to the whispers of affec- 
 tion, and avarice denies to their parents those favors 
 which would materially assist them in the down-hill 
 of life. 
 
 Others, too, by a course of profligacy and vice, 
 have drained to the very dregs their parents' cup of 
 happiness, and made them anxious for death to re- 
 lease them from their sufferings. How bitter must 
 be the doom of those children who have thus embit- 
 tered the lives of their best earthly friends ! 
 
 There can be no happier reflection than that de- 
 rived from the thought of having contributed to the 
 comfort and happiness of our parents. When called 
 away from our presence, which sooner or later must 
 happen, the thought will be sweet that our efforts 
 
"FATHER AND MOTHER." 51 
 
 and our care smoothed their declining years, so that 
 they departed in comfort and peace. If we were oth- 
 erwise, and we denied them what their circumstances 
 and necessities required, and our hearts did not be- 
 come like the nether millstone, our remorse must 
 prove a thorn in our flesh, piercing us sharply, and 
 filling our days with regret. 
 
 There is an enduring tenderness in the love of a 
 mother to her son that transcends all other affections 
 of the heart. It is neither to be chilled by selfish- 
 ness, weakened by worthlessness, nor stifled by in- 
 gratitude. She will sacrifice every comfort to his 
 convenience ; she will surrender every pleasure to his 
 enjoyment ; she will glory in his fame, and exult in 
 his prosperity. If misfortune overtake him, he will 
 be the dearer to her from misfortune ; and if disgrace 
 settles upon his name, she will still love and cherish 
 him in spite of his disgrace. If all the world besides 
 cast him off, she will be all the world to him. 
 
 A father may turn his back on his child, brothers 
 and sisters may become inveterate enemies, husbands 
 may desert their wives, wives their husbands ; but a 
 mother's love endures through all. In good repute, 
 in bad repute, in the face of the world's condemna- 
 tion, a mother still lives on and still hopes that her 
 cjiild may turn from his evil ways and repent ; still 
 she remembers his infant smile that ever filled her 
 bosom with rapture, the merry laugh, the joyful 
 shout of his childhood, the opening promise of his 
 youth ; and thinking of these, she never can be 
 brought to think him all unworthy. 
 
52 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 Young man, speak kindly to your mother, and 
 ever courteously and tenderly of her. But a little 
 while and you shall see her no more forever. Her 
 eye is dim, her form bent, and her shadow falls grave- 
 ward. Others may love you when she has passed 
 away — a kind-hearted sister, perhaps, or she whom 
 of all the world you chose for a partner — she may 
 love you warmly, passionately ; children may love you 
 fondly ; but never again, never, while time is yours, 
 shall the love of woman be to you as that of your 
 old, trembling mother has been. Alas ! how little do 
 we appreciate a mother's tenderness while living ! 
 How heedless are we in youth of all her anxious ten- 
 derness ! But when she is dead and gone, when the 
 cares and coldness of the world come withering to 
 our hearts, when we experience how hard it is to find 
 true sympathy, how few love us for ourselves, how 
 few will befriend us in misfortune, then it is that we 
 think of the mother we have lost. 
 
 The loss of a parent is always felt. Even though 
 age and infirmities may have incapacitated them from 
 taking an active part in the cares of the family, still 
 they are rallying points around which affection and 
 obedience, and a thousand tender endeavors to please, 
 concentrate. They are like the lonely star before us : 
 neither its heat nor light are any thing to us in them- 
 selves, yet the shepherd would feel his heart sad if 
 he missed it when he lifts his eye to the brow of the 
 mountains over which it rises when the sun descends. 
 
 Over the grave of a friend, of a brother or a 
 sister we would plant the primrose, emblematical of 
 
"FATHER AND MOTHER." 53 
 
 youth ; but over that of a mother we would let the 
 green grass shoot up unmolested ; for there is some- 
 thing in the simple covering which nature spreads 
 upon the grave which well becomes the abiding place 
 of decaying age. Oh, a mother's grave ! It is in- 
 deed a sacred spot. It may be retired from the 
 noise of business, and unnoticed by the stranger; 
 but to our heart how dear ! 
 
 The love we should bear to a parent is not to be 
 measured by years, nor annihilated by distance, nor 
 forgotten when they sleep in dust. Marks of age 
 may appear in our homes and on our persons, but the 
 memory of a beloved parent is more enduring than 
 that of time itself. Who has stood by the grave of 
 a mother and not remembered her pleasant smiles, 
 kind words, earnest prayer, and assurance expressed 
 in a dying hour? Many years may have passed, 
 memory may be treacherous in other things, but will 
 reproduce with freshness the impressions once made 
 by a mother's influence. Why may we not linger 
 where rests all that was earthly of a beloved parent ? 
 It may have a restraining influence upon the way- 
 ward, prove a valuable incentive to increased faithful- 
 ness, encourage hope in the hour of depression, and 
 give fresh inspiration to Christian life. 
 
 The mother's love is indeed the golden chord 
 which binds youth to age ; and he is still but a child, 
 however time may have furrowed his cheek or sil- 
 vered his brow, who can yet recall with a softened 
 heart the fond devotion or the gentle chidings of the 
 best friend that God ever gave us. Round the idea 
 
54 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 of mother the mind of a man clings with fond affec- 
 tion. It is the first deep thought stamped upon our 
 infant heart, when yet soft and capable of receiving 
 the most profound impressions ; and the after feelings 
 of the world are more or less light in comparison. 
 Even in old age we look back to that feeling as the 
 sweetest we have known through life. 
 
 Our passions and our willfulness may lead us far 
 from the object of our filial love ; we may come even 
 to pain their heart, to oppose their wishes, to violate 
 their commands. We may become wild, headstrong, 
 or angry at their counsels or oppositions ; but when 
 death has stilled their monitory voices, and nothing 
 but silent memory remains to recapitulate their vir- 
 tues and deeds, affection, like a flower broken to the 
 ground by a past storm, lifts up her head and smiles 
 away our tears. When the early period of our loss 
 forces memory to be silent, fancy takes her place, and 
 twines the image of our dead parents with a garland 
 of graces, beauties, and virtues, which we doubt not 
 they possessed. 
 
 I^NFANCY, the morning of life ! How beautiful 
 fw» it is ! How filled with great responsibilities ! An 
 Kp immortal soul commences its existence. A life, 
 beginning in time, but capable of growing brighter 
 when time is ended and eternity begun, commences 
 to note the passing hours. 
 
INFANCY. 55 
 
 We welcome the infant with joy, and congratu- 
 late the parents, and we do well; but to an angel, 
 who can clearly understand the infinite value of the 
 life just commenced, the heights of happiness to which 
 it may ascend, the depths of misery to which it may 
 be brought, it must seem a moment so deeply freighted 
 with solemn meaning as to dispel all expressions of 
 joy, save only of a subdued and chastened kind. 
 
 Infancy has its hours of anxiety and trials for the 
 parents, but it has also its hours of compensating 
 joys. When sickness is in the midst, and it seems 
 as if the cradle song would be exchanged for a dirge, 
 what utter wretchedness of heart is the parent's por- 
 tion ! A mother watching the palpitating frame of 
 her child as life ebbs slowly away evokes the sym- 
 pathy of the sternest. A child dying dies but once, 
 but the mother dies a hundred times. A mother 
 mourning by the grave of her first-born, and strew- 
 ing flowers over a coffined form instead of kisses on 
 a warm brow, is one of the deepest spectacles of 
 human woe. These are the dark shades, the night 
 scenes of the parents' experience ; but it has its 
 richer, deeper, and more inspiring history, its seasons 
 of comfort and delight, when the little child, insensi- 
 bly, perhaps, draws the parents into a higher and a 
 better life. What a sense of delicious responsibility 
 fills the parents' hearts as they realize that in their 
 hands and under their influence is to be molded a 
 character, that they are the ones to carefully watch 
 the unfolding of a human life, the development of a 
 human soul. 
 
56 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 How earnestly should they seek to set a watch 
 over their lips, to guard well their thoughts and ac- 
 tions, to surround the child with such an air of refined, 
 intelligent, loving kindness that its young life shall as 
 naturally grow into a youth of beauty and a noble 
 manhood or true womanhood as that the bud on the 
 rose-bush expands to the gorgeous flower that ex- 
 cites universal admiration. Welcome to the parents 
 the puny struggler, strong in his weakness, his little 
 arms more irresistible than the soldier's, his lips 
 touched with persuasion which Chatham and Pericles 
 in manhood had not. His unaffected lamentation 
 when he lifts up his voice on high, or, more beautiful, 
 the sobbing child — the face all liquid grief, as he tries 
 to swallow his vexation — soften all hearts to pity and 
 to mirthful and clamorous compassion. 
 
 The parent's duty commences at the birth of the 
 child. There is importance even in the handling of 
 infancy. If it is unchristian it will beget unchristian 
 states and feelings. If it is gentle, even patient and 
 loving, it prepares a mood and temper like its own. 
 Then how careful to banish the cross word, the im- 
 patient gesture! Let kind and loving tones only fall 
 on its ears, and only gentle hands assist it in its little 
 wants. There is scarcely room to doubt that all 
 most crabbed, resentful, passionate characters — all 
 most even, lovely, firm, and true ones — are prepared 
 in a great degree by the handling of the nursery. 
 The biography of many persons, faithfully written, 
 would ascribe to the training of early years the 
 molding not only of youthful character, but the 
 
INFANCY. 57 
 
 more matured forms of mental and moral develop- 
 ment of after years. The influence thus exerted in 
 the early days of infancy is often the almost hopeless 
 ■V casting of bread upon the waters" — often not 
 found in any of its favorable developments until after 
 "many days." The cares of the world and the evil 
 example of others often choke the word of a good 
 mother, and destroy its vitality ; but not unfrequently 
 it will be found, like seed long buried in the earth, 
 to spring up to remembrance in active life, and the 
 counsels imparted to the "infant of days" be found 
 to influence and control the whole destiny of the man 
 of mature years and gray hairs. 
 
 As it is a law of our being that all, even the most 
 feeble and insignificant, exert a reciprocal influence 
 on all around them, then an infant exerts a great 
 modifying influence on the elder men and women 
 around it. It recalls them from the contemplation of 
 the stern realties of life to its innocent phases, from 
 disdainful, self-reliant pride to trustful confidence. 
 Hearts that but for the smile of innocence on the 
 prattling lips of infancy had grown callous beat once 
 more in sympathy with the distressed around them. 
 The feeble clasp of well-nigh helpless hands is some- 
 times powerful enough to turn strong men from the 
 road to ruin. An infant in his cradle is king, and 
 wields his power over all who come near him. 
 
 Infants are the poetry of the world; the fresh 
 flowers of our hearts and homes; little conjurers, 
 with the magic of their natural ways, working by 
 their spells what delights and enriches all ranks and 
 
58 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 equalizes the different classes of society. Every in- 
 fant comes into the world, like a delegated prophet, 
 the harbinger and herald of good tidings, whose of- 
 fice it is to make young again hearts well-nigh wea- 
 ried with the cares of years. A child warms and 
 softens the. heart by its gentle presence; it enriches 
 the soul by new feeling, and it awakens within it 
 what is favorable to virtue. An infant is a beam of 
 light, a fountain of love, a teacher, whose lessons few 
 can resist. They recall us from much that engenders 
 and encourages selfishness, that freezes the affec- 
 tions, roughens the manners, and indurates the heart. 
 They brighten the home, deepen love, invigorate ex- 
 ertion, infuse courage, and vivify and sustain the 
 charities of life. 
 
 An infant finds a place in the hearts of all people. 
 The selfish and proud open their hearts to its silent 
 influence. The aged, who are standing near the 
 end of the journey of life, have the scenes of their 
 younger days called up afresh by the child's artless 
 ways, and in its company grow young again. The 
 disconsolate seem to catch a fresh gleam of hope 
 when they see the confiding ways of the little child, 
 and take heart again. 
 
 It would seem fitting that nature should exempt 
 little children from sickness and death, but, alas ! im- 
 partial fate, which, 
 
 "With equal pace, 
 Knocks at the palace as the cottage gate," 
 
 Is no respecter of age. What a great hush falls on 
 the ear, like a pall, and an untold sadness settles 
 
INFANCY. 59 
 
 over the heart when the little child is sick. Is it not 
 strange that such a wee bit of a thing should have 
 the power to change every thing, making the sun- 
 shine that but yesterday played in and out of the 
 windows so merrily and bright seem such a mockery 
 to-day, changing the joyous tones of the other chil- 
 dren into funeral notes? Why is it that the soft 
 winds, which but lately seemed burdened with joy, 
 and came softly whispering of pleasant dells, of flow- 
 ing streams, of flowery banks, to-day seem strangely 
 sighing, to have exchanged its joy for sorrow ? 
 
 But such is the spell that baby has woven, knitting 
 itself into the very meshes of our hearts in such a 
 quiet, subduing manner that we scarcely know how 
 dear it is until the little form lies still and prostrate. 
 Great as is the influence of the little child while liv- 
 ing it has also a sweet and sacred influence when its 
 brief life is over and the solemn "dust unto dust" 
 and " ashes unto ashes" has been said over the little 
 mound in the church-yard. 
 
 Sweet places for pure thought and holy medita- 
 tion are these little graves. They are depositories 
 of the mother's sweetest joy, unfolded buds of inno- 
 cence, humanity nipped by the frosts of time ere yet 
 a canker-worm of corruption has nestled among its 
 embryo petals. 
 
 Callous, indeed, must be the heart of him who 
 can stand by a little grave-side and not have the 
 holiest emotions of the soul awakened to thoughts 
 of purity and joy, which belong alone to God and 
 heaven. The mute preacher at his feet tells of a life 
 
60 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 begun and ended without a stain; and surely if this 
 be vouchsafed to mortality, how much more pure and 
 holier must be the spirit-land, enlightened by the sun 
 of infinite goodness, from whence emanated the soul 
 of that brief sojourner among us ! How swells the 
 soul with joy when standing by the earth-beds of lost 
 little ones, sorrowful because a sweet treasure has 
 been taken away, joyful because that sweet jewel 
 glitters in the diadem of the redeemed. 
 
 Such, then, is infancy. 'Tis the brief morning 
 hour which precedes the busy day. It may be grand 
 and beautiful, while its after life may but be dark 
 and lowering, going out at last with wailing winds 
 and weeping storms. Or it may be bleak and dreary, 
 only at last to break forth into the full glory of the 
 beauteous Summer day. But whatever its present 
 state care and trouble and sorrow are sure to await 
 it. So train it, then, that it shall expect them and 
 look to the only true source for aid and assistance 
 for the trials that lie in store for it. 
 
 €5FftM>$fOOD. 
 
 |||HlLDHOOD, after reason "lias begun her sway, 
 seems to us the happiest season of life. It is 
 
 also the critical period. At this time they re- 
 ceive those impressions and contract those hab- 
 its which impel them towards the good and true or 
 towards the evil and false. 
 
CHILDHOOD. 61 
 
 The child's soul is without character. It is a 
 rudimental existence, pure as the driven snow — beau- 
 tiful as a cherub angel, spotless, guileless, and inno- 
 cent. It is the chart of a man yet to be filled up 
 with the elements of a character. These elements 
 are first outlined by the parents. With what delicacy 
 should they use the pencil of personal influence ! 
 The soul is soft, and the lines they make are deep 
 and not easily erased. It is a man they form. Re- 
 sponsible work ! It is an immortal soul they work 
 upon, destined to survive the wreck of matter and 
 the crush of worlds, and to show in its character 
 forever some distant trace, at least, of their work. 
 
 Never believe any thing that concerns children to 
 be of no importance. A hasty word is of conse- 
 quence. The little things that they see and hear, 
 about them mold them for eternity. Observe how 
 very quick the child's eye is to perceive the meaning 
 of looks, voices, and motions. It peruses all faces, 
 colors, and sounds. Every sentiment that looks into 
 its eye is reflected therefrom, and plays in miniature 
 on its countenance. The tear that steals down the 
 cheek of a mother's suppressed grief gathers the 
 little infantile face into a sob. With a wondering 
 silence it studies the mother in her prayers, and 
 looks up with her in that exploring watch which sig- 
 nifies unspoken prayer. If the child be tended with 
 impatience, or coolly and with a lack of motherly 
 gentleness, it straightway shows by its action that it, 
 too, feels the sting of just that which is felt towards 
 it. And thus it is angered by anger, fretted by fret- 
 
62 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 fulness, irritated by irritation, having impressed upon 
 it just that kind of impatience or ill-nature which is 
 felt towards it, and growing faithfully into the bad 
 mold as by a fixed law. 
 
 However apparently trivial the influences which 
 contribute to form the character of the child, they 
 endure through life. Those impulses to conduct 
 which last the longest and are rooted the deepest 
 always have their origin near our birth. It is there 
 that the germs of virtue or vice, of feeling or senti- 
 ment, are first implanted which determine the char- 
 acter for life. It is in childhood that the mind is 
 most open to impression, and ready to be kindled by 
 the first spark that flies into it. The first thing con- 
 tinues always with the child. The first joy, the first 
 failure, the first achievement, the first misadventure, 
 paint the foreground of life. 
 
 Influence is as quiet and imperceptible on the 
 child's mind as the falling of snowflakes on the 
 meadows. One can not tell the hour when the hu- 
 man mind is not in the condition of receiving impres- 
 sions from exterior moral forces. In innumerable 
 instances the most secret and unnoticed influences 
 have been in operation for months, and even years, 
 to break down the strongest barriers of the human 
 heart, and work out its moral ruin while yet the 
 fondest parents and friends have been unaware of 
 the working of such unseen agents of evil. 
 
 Children are more easily led to be good by ex- 
 amples of loving kindness and tales of well-doing in 
 others than threatened into obedience by records of 
 
CHILDHOOD. 63 
 
 sin, crime, and punishment. Then strive to impress 
 on the child's mind sincerity, truth, honesty, benevo- 
 lence, and their kindred virtues, and the welfare of 
 your child, not only for this life, but for the life to 
 come, will be assured. What a responsibility it is to 
 form a creature, the frailest and feeblest that heaven 
 has made, into the intelligent and fearless sovereign 
 of the whole animated universe, the interpreter, 
 adorer, and almost representative of Divinity ! 
 
 There is much mistaken kindness in the manage- 
 ment of children. The law of love is great, but it 
 showeth not its full strength, save when united with 
 kindness. Make your children helpful and useful, 
 and you make them happy. Let them early form 
 habits of neatness, and when you are weary you will 
 not have to wait on their carelessness. 
 
 Teach them to give you courteous speech and 
 manners, and they will live to honor you. Take 
 pains to have the home attractions stronger than can 
 come from outside influences. It is a sad fact that 
 few children confide in their parents. The parents 
 must take an interest in them, and draw them to 
 their hearts instead of repelling them away. There 
 is no mystery in attaching children to one's self. If 
 you love them, they will love you. If you make 
 much of them, they will make much of you. They 
 can readily pick out the children's friend among 
 many. They have a quick way of discerning who 
 really love them and who care for them. 
 
 Parents do not think how far a word of praise 
 will ofttimes go with children. Praise is sunshine to 
 
64 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 3. child, and there is no child who does not need it. 
 It is the high reward of one's struggle to do right. 
 Many a sensitive child hungers for commendation. 
 Many a child, starving for the praise which parents 
 should give, runs off eagerly after the designing flat- 
 tery of others. To withhold praise where it is due 
 is dishonest, and, in the case of a child, such a course 
 often leaves a stinging sense of injustice. One may 
 as well think to rear flowers in frost as to think of 
 educating children successfully in rebuff and constant 
 criticism. Judicious flattery is almost one of the ne- 
 cessities of existence with children. Indiscriminate 
 flattery is, of course, bad. When it becomes neces- 
 sary to reprove children, use the gentlest form of 
 address under the circumstances. Reproof must not 
 fall like a violent storm, breaking down and making 
 those to droop whom it is meant to cherish and 
 refresh. It must descend as the dew upon the tender 
 herb, or like melting flakes of snow. The softer it 
 falls, the longer it dwells upon, and the deeper it 
 sinks into, the mind. 
 
 Never reprove the little ones before strangers; 
 for children are as sensitive, if not more so, than 
 older persons, and wish strangers to think well of 
 them. When reproved before any one with whom 
 they are not well acquainted, their vanity is wounded. 
 They have self-respect, and such mortification of it is 
 dangerous. Praise spurs a child on to earnest effort; 
 blame, when administered before visitors, takes away 
 the power of doing well. 
 
 It is the parents' duty to make their children's 
 
CHILDHOOD. 65 
 
 childhood full of love and childhood's proper joyous- 
 ness. Not all the appliances that wealth can buy are 
 necessary to the free and happy unfolding of child- 
 hood in body, mind, and heart. But children must 
 have love inside the house, and fresh air and good 
 play and companionship outside ; otherwise young life 
 runs the danger of withering and growing stunted, 
 or, at best, prematurely old and turned inward on 
 itself. There is something in loving dependent chil- 
 dren, in tender care for them, which bestows upon 
 the soul the most enriching of its experience. They 
 make us tender and sympathetic, and a thousand 
 times reward us for all we do for them. We are in- 
 debted to them for constant incentives to noble 
 living ; for the perpetual reminder that we do not 
 live for ourselves alone. For their sake we are ad- 
 monished to put from us the debasing appetite, the 
 unworthy impulse ; to gather into our lives every 
 noble and heroic quality, every tender and attractive 
 grace. We owe them gratitude for the dark hour 
 their presence has brightened ; for the helplessness 
 and dependence which have won us from ourselves ; 
 for the faith and trust which it is evermore their 
 mission to renew ; for their kisses, wet with tears, 
 placed on brows that, but for their caressing, had 
 furrowed into frowns. 
 
 The gleeful laugh of happy children is the best 
 home music, and the graceful figures of childhood 
 are the best statuary. They are well-springs of 
 pleasure, messengers of peace and love, resting- 
 places for innocence, links between angels and men. 
 
 5 
 
66 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 Their eyes, those clear wells of undefiled thought, — 
 what is more beautiful ? Full of hope, love, and cu- 
 riosity, they meet your own. In prayer, how earnest ; 
 in joy, how sparkling ; in sympathy, how tender ! 
 The man or woman who never tried the companion- 
 ship of a little child has carelessly passed by one of 
 the greatest pleasures of life, as one passes a rare 
 flower without plucking or knowing its value. A 
 home, and no children, — it is like a lantern, and no 
 candle ; a garden, and no flowers ; a vine, and no 
 grapes ; a brook, and no water gurgling and gushing 
 in its channels. 
 
 Nature affords striking proofs of foresight and 
 wisdom in making the bonds of parental sympathy 
 so invincibly strong and lasting. During childhood 
 and youth, and even afterwards, when these charming 
 epochs of life have passed away, the ties of constancy 
 and attachment continue to prevail. Were not the 
 chords of love thus strengthened, they would fre- 
 quently be snapped asunder ; for the severest trials 
 which the world knows are those which assail the 
 parental heart and pierce it with the deepest sorrows. 
 
 How fleeting are the happiness and innocent 
 guilelessness of childhood ! The years as they come 
 bring with them intelligence and experience ; but 
 they take with them, in their resistless course, the 
 innocent pleasures of childhood's years. Then deal 
 gently, patiently, and kindly with them. You may 
 be nearly over the rough pathway of life your- 
 selves ; make the only time of life that they can call 
 happy as pleasant as possible. " Our children," says 
 
BROTHER AND SISTER. 67 
 
 Madame de Stael, "who are tenderly reared by us, 
 are soon destined for others than ourselves. They 
 soon stride rapidly forward in the career of life, 
 while we fall slowly back. They soon begin to re- 
 gard their parents in the light of memory and to 
 look upon others in the light of hope." 
 
 They will not trouble you long. Children grow 
 up; nothing on earth grows so fast as children. It 
 was but yesterday and that lad was playing with 
 tops, a buoyant boy. He is a man now. There 
 is no more childhood for him or for us. Life has 
 claimed him. When a beginning is made, it is like 
 a raveling stocking ; stitch by stitch gives way till all 
 are gone. The house has not a child left in it ; 
 there is no more noise in the hall ; no boys rush in, 
 pell-mell ; it is very orderly now. There are no 
 more skates or sleds, bats, balls, or strings left scat- 
 tered about. There are no more gleeful laughs of 
 happy girls, or dolls left to litter the best room. 
 There is no delay for sleeping folks ; there is no 
 longer any task before you lie down. But the moth- 
 er's heart is heavy, and the father's house is lonely. 
 
 jHE affections that exist between the members 
 of the same family afford a pleasing spectacle 
 h of human happiness. That which exists be- 
 tween brother and sister should be assiduously 
 cultivated. It is a beautiful and lovely feeling, and 
 
68 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 seems to be wholly angelic in its thoughts and feel- 
 ings. It must necessarily be a pure, spiritual love. It 
 arises, not from a sense of gratitude, or for favors re- 
 ceived, or from any thing save the endearing relation- 
 ship of family. It rests not on any thing but a spiritual 
 affinity of soul. It should be cultivated as one of 
 the sweetest plants in the garden of the heart. It 
 should be watered every morning and evening with 
 the dews of good nature, and sunned all day with 
 the light of kindness. It should hear nothing but 
 loving and tender words, even the dulcet music of 
 home; see nothing but smiles and the tokens of con- 
 fidence and sympathy, and know nothing but its own 
 spirit of tenderness and unity. 
 
 How large and cherished a place does a good 
 sister's love always hold in the grateful memory of 
 one who has been blessed with the benefit of this 
 relation! How many are there who, in the changes 
 of mature years, have found a sister's love their 
 ready and adequate resource! With what a sense 
 of security is confidence reposed in a good sister, 
 and with what assurance that it will be uprightly and 
 considerately given is her counsel sought ! How in- 
 timate is the friendship of such a brother and sister 
 not widely separated in age from one another! 
 
 What a reliance for warning, caution, and sym- 
 pathy has each secured in each! How many are 
 the brothers who, when thrown into circumstances 
 of temptation, have found the thought of a sister's 
 love a constant, holy presence, rebuking every way- 
 ward thought! How many brothers are there from 
 
BROTHER AND SISTER. . 69 
 
 whom death separated the sister years ago who yet 
 feel her influence thrown around them like sweet in- 
 cense from an unseen censor ; who are arrested, when 
 just about to take a downward step, by the memory 
 of a reproving look from eyes that have long been 
 closed; who have pursued their weary path of duty, 
 cheered by the remembrance of a smile from lips 
 that will never smile again ! 
 
 Who can tell the thoughts that cluster around 
 the word sister ? How ready she is to forgive the 
 foibles of a brother! She never deserts him. In 
 adversity she clings closely to him, and in trial she 
 cheers him. When the bitter voice of reproach is 
 poured in his ears she is ever ready to hush its hard 
 tones, and to turn his attention away from its painful 
 notes. Let him move in pleasant paths, she hangs 
 clusters of flowers about him. 
 
 In watching his favored career and listening to his 
 eulogy she feels the purest satisfaction. The cold 
 grave can not crush her affections for him — it out- 
 lives her tears and sighs; and hence she often 
 wanders to the spot where he reposes with the fra- 
 grant rose-bush and creeping honeysuckle, and plants 
 them on his tomb; and who will dare to affirm her 
 love perishes when she passes away from earth? 
 May it not live far off in the glorious land, increasing 
 in fervor and intensity as the years of eternity pass 
 away? 
 
 Affection does not beget weakness, nor is it ef- 
 feminate for a brother to be firmly attached to a 
 sister. Such a boy will make a noble and brave 
 
70 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 man. The young man who was accustomed to kiss 
 his sweet, innocent sister night and morning as they 
 met shows its influence upon him. He will never 
 forget it, and when he shall take some one to his 
 heart as his wife she shall reap the golden fruits 
 thereof. The young man who is in the habit of giv- 
 ing his arm to his sister as they walk to and from 
 church will never leave his wife to find her way as 
 best she can. He who has been trained to see that 
 his sister was seated before he sought his own will 
 never mortify a neglected wife in the presence of 
 strangers. And the young man who frequently 
 handed his sister to her chair at the table will never 
 have cause to blush as he sees some gentleman 
 extend to his wife the courtesy she knows is due 
 from him. 
 
 The intercourse of brother and sister forms an 
 important element in the happy influence of home. 
 A boisterous or a selfish boy may try to domineer 
 over the weaker or more dependent girl. But gen- 
 erally the latter exerts a softening influence. The 
 brother animates and. heartens ; the sister modifies 
 and refines. The vine-tree and its sustaining elm 
 are the emblems of such a relation ; and by such 
 agencies our "sons may become like plants grown 
 up in youth, and our daughters like corner-stones 
 polished after the similitude of a temple." 
 
 Sisters scarcely know the influence they have 
 over their brothers. A young man is pretty much 
 what his sister and young lady friends choose to 
 make him. If sisters are watchful and affectionate 
 

 BROTHER AND SISTER. 71 
 
 they may in various ways lead them along till their 
 characters are formed, and then a high respect for 
 ladies and a manly self-respect will keep them from 
 mingling in low society. 
 
 Girls, especially those who are members of a 
 large family, have a great influence at home, where 
 brothers delight in their sisters, and where parents 
 look fondly down on their daughters. Girls have 
 much in their power with regard to those boys ; 
 they have in their power to make them gentler, 
 truer, purer ; to give them higher opinion of woman ; 
 to soften their manner and ways ; to tone down rough 
 places, and shape sharp, angular corners. They 
 should interest themselves in their pursuits, and show 
 them by every means in their power that they do not 
 consider them and their doings beneath their notice. 
 
 But few sisters realize how much they have to do 
 with the welfare of their brothers — how much it is 
 in their power to win them to the right modes of 
 thoughts and actions by little acts of sisterly atten- 
 tions. If they would but spare an hour now and 
 then from their peculiar employment to their boyish 
 sports, and not turn contemptuously away from the 
 books and amusements in which they delight, they 
 would soon find how a gentle word would turn off a 
 sharp answer ; how a genial look would effectually 
 reprove an unfitting expression ; how gratefully a 
 small kindness would be received, and how un- 
 bounded would be the power for good they would 
 obtain by a continuance of such conduct. 
 
 Fortunate is the family that possesses such an 
 
72 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 elder sister. The mother confides in her, the father 
 takes pride in her ability to aid and cheer the house- 
 hold, and the younger ones lean upon her. By her 
 counsels, her example, her influence, she may do as 
 much as the parents to give to the family life. She 
 is at once companion and counselor for the younger 
 members, since separated by only a brief interval 
 from the sports of childhood she can sympathize 
 easily with the little wants and little griefs that fill 
 the child's heart to overflowing, and show it how to 
 compass its desires and forget its sorrows. A short 
 girlhood is usually the allotment of the oldest daugh- 
 ter; but this is more than made up to her in the 
 long and delightful companionship she has with her 
 mother, in the sense she is made to have of her own 
 importance in the family, and the unusual capability 
 she is obliged by the force of circumstances to ac- 
 quire and display. 
 
 It is a law of our being that no improvement that 
 takes place in either of the sexes is confined to itself; 
 each is the universal mirror to each, and the refine- 
 ments of the one will always be in reciprocal propor- 
 tion to the polish of the other. The brother and 
 sister should grow up together, be educated at the 
 same school, engage in the same sports, and, as far 
 as practicable, in the same labors. Their joys and 
 sorrows, tastes and aims, should be mutual as far as 
 possible. The same moral lessons, obligations, and 
 duties should bear upon them. It is an error that 
 the youths of our land are separated in so many of 
 the most important duties of life. 
 
BROTHER AND SISTER. 73 
 
 Much evil is caused by mistaken opinions on this 
 point. The girls are taught that it is not pretty to 
 be with the boys and the boys that it is not manly 
 to be with the girls, while at the same time the 
 society of each is necessary for the best development 
 of character in the other. When they do meet it is 
 only for sport and nonsense, to cajole and deceive 
 each other. Hence the good influence they should 
 have upon each other is in a great measure lost. 
 They are unacquainted with each other, know not 
 each other's natures, and have but little interest in 
 each other's business and duties. 
 
 We want the girls to rival the boys in all that is 
 good, refined, and ennobling. We want them to 
 rival the boys, as they well can, in learning, in un- 
 derstanding, in all noble qualities of mind and heart, 
 but not in any of the rougher qualities and traits. 
 We want the girls to be gentle — not weak, but 
 gentle — and kind and affectionate. We want to be 
 sure that wherever a girl is there should be a sweet, 
 subduing, and harmonizing influence of purity and 
 truth and love pervading and hallowing from center 
 to circumference the entire circle in which she moves. 
 It is her mission to instruct the boys in all need- 
 ful lessons of neatness and order, of patience and 
 goodness. 
 
 We want the boys to be gentle, courteous, and 
 considerate towards their younger sisters ; to be the 
 protector and emulator of their virtues. We want to 
 be sure that where there is a boy there will go forth 
 the influence inspired by the courage of manly self- 
 
74 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 respect — a respect that keeps him from mingling in 
 low society. We want him to be every whit a man, 
 a fit friend and companion for true womanhood. 
 We want to see them both enjoy the Spring-time of 
 life, for this is the season of joy, of bliss, of strength, 
 of pride; it is the treasury of life, in which nature 
 stores up those riches which are for our future 
 employment and profit. Youth is to age what the 
 flower is to the fruit, the leaf to the tree, the sand 
 to the glass. Hence we want to see them both so 
 using the golden age of youth as to be able to reap 
 a rich harvest in the years of maturity. 
 
 ]OTttfOOX>. 
 
 . <4>o . 
 
 ^^^ANHOOD is the isthmus between two ex- 
 ygSw tremes — the ripe, the fertile season of action, 
 |j when alone we can hope ,to find the head to 
 contrive united with the hand to execute. 
 Each age has its peculiar duties and privileges, 
 pleasures and pains. When young we trust our- 
 selves too much ; when old we trust others too little. 
 Rashness is the error of youth, timid caution of age. 
 In youth we build castles and plan for ourselves a 
 course of action through life. As we approach old 
 age we see more and more plainly that we are simply 
 carried forward by a mighty torrent, borne here and 
 there against our will. We then perceive how little 
 control we have had in reality over our course ; that 
 
MANHOOD. 75 
 
 our actions, resolves, and endeavors, which seemed 
 to give such a guiding course to our life, 
 
 "Are but eddies of the mighty stream 
 That rolls to its appointed end." 
 
 In childhood time goes by on leaden wings, — ten, 
 twenty years, a life-time seems an endless period. 
 At manhood we are surprised that time goes so 
 rapidly; we then comprehend the fleeting period of 
 life. In old age the years that are passed seem as a 
 dream of the night, our life as a tale nearly told. 
 Childhood is the season of dreams and high resolves ; 
 manhood, of plans and actions ; age, of retrospection 
 and regret. 
 
 There is certainly no age more potential for good 
 or evil than that of early manhood. The young men 
 have, with much propriety, been denominated the 
 flower of a country. To be a man and seem to be 
 one are two different things. All young men should 
 carefully consider what is meant by manhood. It does 
 not consist in years simply, nor in form and figure. 
 It lies above and beyond these things. It is the 
 product of the cultivation of every power of the soul, 
 and of every high spiritual quality naturally inherent 
 or graciously supplemented. It should be the great 
 object of living to attain this true manhood. There 
 is no higher pursuit for the youth to propose to him- 
 self. He is standing at the opening gates of active 
 life. There he catches the first glimpse of the pos- 
 sibilities in store for him. There he first perceives 
 the duties that will shortly devolve upon him. What 
 
76 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 higher aim can he propose to himself than to act his 
 part in life as becomes a man who lives not only for 
 time but for eternity ? How earnestly should he 
 resolve to walk worthily in all that true manhood 
 requires ! 
 
 There are certain claims, great and weighty, rest- 
 ing upon all young men which they can not shake off 
 if they would. They grow out of those indissoluble 
 relations which they sustain to society, and those 
 invaluable interests — social, civil, and religious — with 
 all the duties and responsibilities connected with 
 them, which are soon to be transferred to their 
 shoulders from the venerable fathers who have borne 
 the burden and heat of the day. The various de- 
 partments of business and trust, the pulpit and the 
 bar, our courts of justice and halls of legislation, our 
 civil, religious, and literary institutions, all, in short, 
 that constitute society and go to make life useful and 
 happy, are to be in their hands and under their 
 control. 
 
 Society, in committing to the young her interests 
 and privileges, imposes upon them corresponding 
 claims, and demands that they be prepared to fill 
 with honor and usefulness the places which they are 
 destined to occupy. Young men can not take a 
 rational view of the station to which they are ad- 
 vancing, or of the duties that are coming upon them, 
 without feeling deeply their need of high and peculiar 
 qualifications. 
 
 Every young man should come forward in life 
 with a determination to do all the good he can, and 
 
MANHOOD. 77 
 
 to leave the world the better for his having lived in 
 it. He should consider that he was not made for 
 himself alone, but for society, for mankind, and for 
 God. He should consider that he is a constituent, 
 responsible member of the great family of man, and, 
 while he should pay particular attention to the wants 
 and welfare of those with whom he is immediately 
 connected, he should accustom himself to send his 
 thoughts abroad over the wide field of practical be- 
 nevolence. 
 
 There is within the young man an uprising of 
 lofty sentiments which contribute to his elevation, 
 and though there are obstacles to be surmounted 
 and difficulties to be vanquished, yet with truth for 
 his watchword, and relying on his own noble pur- 
 poses and exertions, he may crown his brow with im- 
 perishable honors. He may never wear the warrior's 
 crimson wreath, the poet's chaplet of bays, or the 
 statesman's laurels ; though no grand, universal truth 
 may at his bidding stand confessed to the world ; 
 though it may never be his to bring to a successful 
 issue a great political revolution ; to be the founder 
 of a republic which shall be a distinguished star in 
 the constellation of nations ; even more, though his 
 name may never be heard beyond the narrow limits 
 of his own neighborhood, yet is his mission none the 
 less a high and noble one. 
 
 In the moral and physical world not only the 
 field of battle but also the cause of truth and virtue 
 calls for champions, and the field for doing good is 
 white unto the harvest. If he enlists in the ranks, 
 
78 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 and his spirits faint not, he may write his name 
 among the stars of heaven. Beautiful lives have 
 blossomed in the darkest places, as pure, white lilies, 
 full of fragrance, sometimes bloom on the slimy, 
 stagnant waters. No possession is so productive of 
 real influence as a highly cultivated intellect. Wealth, 
 birth, and official station may and do secure an ex- 
 ternal, superficial courtesy, but they never did and 
 never can secure the reverence of the heart. It is 
 only to the man of large and noble soul — to him 
 who blends a cultivated mind with an upright heart — 
 that men yield the tribute of deep and genuine re- 
 spect. A man should never glory in that which is 
 common to a beast ; nor a wise man in that which is 
 common to a fool; nor a good man in that which is 
 common to a wicked man. 
 
 Since it is in the intellect that we trace the source 
 of all that is great and noble in man it follows that 
 if any are ambitious to possess a true manhood they 
 will be men of reflection, men whose daily acts are 
 controlled by their judgment, men who recognize the 
 fact that life is a real and earnest affair, that time is 
 fleeting, and, consequently, resolve to waste none of 
 it in frivolities ; men whose life and conversation are 
 indicative of that serious mien and deportment which 
 well becomes those who have great interests com- 
 mitted to their charge, and who are determined that in 
 so far as in them lies life with them shall be a success, 
 who fully realize the importance of every step they 
 may take, and, consequently, bring to it the careful 
 consideration of a mind trained to think with precision. 
 
MANHOOD. 79 
 
 The man who thinks, reads, studies, and medi- 
 tates has intelligence cut in his features, stamped on 
 his brow, and gleaming in his eye. Thinking, not 
 growth, makes perfect manhood. There are some 
 who, though they are done growing, are only boys. 
 The constitution may be fixed while the judgment is 
 immature ; the limbs may be strong while the reason- 
 ing is feeble. Many who can run and jump and bear 
 any fatigue can not observe, can not examine, can 
 not reason or judge, contrive or execute — they do 
 not think. Such persons, though they may have the 
 figure of a man and the years of a man, are not in 
 possession of manhood ; they will not acquire it until 
 they learn to look beyond the present, and take broad 
 and comprehensive views of their relations to society. 
 
 As we often mistake glittering tinsel for solid 
 gold, so we often mistake specious appearances for 
 true worth and manhood. We are too prone to take 
 professions and words in lieu of actions ; too easily 
 impressed with good clothes and polite bearings to 
 inquire into the character and doings of the individ- 
 ual. Man should be rated, not by his hoards of 
 gold, not by the simple or temporary influence ,he 
 may for a time exert, but by his unexceptionable 
 principles relative both to character and religion. 
 Strike out these and what is he? A savage without 
 sympathy! Take them away, and his manship is 
 gone ; he no longer lives in the image of his Creator. 
 No smile gladdens his lips, no look of sympathy il- 
 lumes his countenance to tell of love and charity for 
 the woes of others. 
 
80 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 But let man go abroad with just principles, and 
 what is he ? An exhaustless fountain in a vast desert ! 
 A glorious sun, shining ever, dispelling every vestige 
 of darkness. There is love animating his heart, 
 sympathy breathing in every tone. Tears of pity — 
 dew-drops of the soul — gather in his eye, and gush 
 impetuously down his cheek. A good man is abroad, 
 and the world knows and feels it. Beneath his smile 
 lurks no degrading passion ; within his heart there 
 slumbers no guile. He is not exalted in mortal 
 pride, not elevated in his own views, but honest, 
 moral, and virtuous before the world. He stands 
 throned on truth ; his fortress is wisdom, and his 
 dominion is the vast and limitless universe. Always 
 upright, kind, and sympathizing; always attached to 
 just principles, and actuated by the same, governed 
 by the highest motives in doing good; these consti- 
 tute his only true manliness. 
 
 $£OJV[&]^OOD. 
 
 AT should be the highest ambition of every young 
 woman to possess a true womanhood. Earth 
 presents no higher object of attainment. To be 
 a woman is the truest and best thing beneath the 
 skies. A true woman exists independent of outward 
 adornments. It is not wealth, or beauty of person, 
 or connection, or station, or power of mind, or liter- 
 ary attainments, or variety and richness of outward 
 
WOMANHOOD. 81 
 
 accomplishments, that make the woman. These often 
 adorn womanhood, as the ivy adorns the oak, but 
 they should never be mistaken for the thing they 
 adorn. 
 
 The great error of womankind is that they take 
 the shadow for the substance, the glitter for the 
 gold, the heraldry and trappings of the world for the 
 priceless essence of womanly worth which exists 
 within the mind. Every young man, as a general 
 rule, has some purpose laid down for the grand object 
 of his life — some plan, for the accomplishment of 
 which all his other actions are made to serve as 
 auxiliaries. It is to be regretted that every young 
 woman does not also have a set purpose of life — 
 some grand aim, grand in its character. She should, 
 in the first place, know what she is, what power she 
 possesses, what influences are to go out from her, 
 what position in life she was designed to fill, what 
 duties are resting upon her, what she is capable of 
 being, what fields of profit and pleasure are open to 
 her, how much joy and pleasure she may find in a 
 true life of womanly activity. 
 
 When she has duly considered these things, she 
 should then form the high purpose of being a true 
 woman, and make every circumstance bend to her 
 will for the accomplishment of this noble purpose. 
 There can be no higher aim to set before herself. 
 There is no nobler attainment this side of the spirit- 
 land than lofty womanhood. There is no ambition 
 more pure than that which craves this crown for 
 her mortal brow. To be a genuine woman, full of 
 
82 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 womanly instincts and power, forming the intuitive 
 genius of her penetrative soul, the subduing author- 
 ity of her gentle yet resolute will, is to be a peer 
 of earth's highest intelligence. All young women 
 have this noble prize before them. They may all 
 put on the glorious crown of womanhood. They 
 may make their lives grand in womanly virtues. 
 
 A true woman has a power, something peculiarly 
 her own, in her moral influence, which, when duly 
 developed, makes her queen over a wide realm of 
 spirit. But this she can possess only as her pow- 
 ers are cultivated. It is cultivated women that wield 
 the scepter of authority among men. Wherever 
 cultivated woman dwells, there is refinement, intel- 
 lect, moral power, life in its highest form. To be 
 a cultivated woman she must commence early, and 
 make this the grand aim of her life. Whether she 
 work or play, travel or remain at home, converse 
 with friends or study books, gaze at flowers or toil 
 in the kitchen, visit the pleasure party or the sanctu- 
 ary of God, she keeps this object before her mind, 
 and taxes all her powers for its attainment. 
 
 Every young woman should also determine to do 
 something for the honor and elevation of her sex. 
 Her powers of mind and body should be applied to a 
 good end. Let her resolve to help with the weight 
 of her encouragement and counsels her sisters who 
 are striving nobly to be useful, to remove as far as 
 possible the obstacles in their way. Let her call to 
 her aid all the forces of character she can command 
 to enable her to persist in being a woman of the true 
 
WOMANHOOD. 83 
 
 stamp. In every class of society the young women 
 should awaken to their duty. They have a great 
 work to do. It is not enough that they should be 
 what their mothers were — they must be more. The 
 spirit of the times calls on women for a higher order 
 of character and life. Will they heed the call? Will 
 they emancipate themselves from the fetters of cus- 
 tom and fashion, and come up, a glorious company, 
 to the possession of a vigorous, virtuous, noble wo- 
 manhood, that shall shed new light upon the world 
 and point the way to a divine life ? 
 
 Woman's influence is the chief anchor of society, 
 and this influence is purifying the world, and the 
 work she has already accomplished will last forever. 
 No costly marble can build a more enduring monu- 
 ment to her memory than the impress she makes on 
 her own household. The changing scenes of life 
 may hurl the genius of man from eminence to utter 
 ruin ; for his life hangs on the fabric of public opinion. 
 But the honest form of a true mother reigns queen 
 in the hearts of her children forever. 
 
 Man's admirers may be greater, but woman holds 
 her kindred by a silken cord of familiar kindness, 
 strengthened and extended by each little courtesy of 
 a life-time. Man may make his monument of granite 
 or of marble, woman hers of immortality. Man may 
 enjoy here, she. will enjoy hereafter. Man may move 
 the rough crowd by his eloquence, woman will turn 
 his coarseness into a cheerful life. Man may make 
 laws and control legislatures, woman will mold their 
 minds in the school-room and be the author of their 
 
84 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 grandest achievements. Cruelty, she despises, and it 
 lessens at her bidding; purity she admires, and it 
 grows in her presence ; music she loves, and her 
 home is full of its melody ; happiness is her herald, 
 and she infuses a world with a desire for enjoyment. 
 Without her, cabins would be fit for dwellings, furs 
 fit for clothing, and all the arts and improvements 
 would be wanting in stimulus and ambition ; for the 
 world is moved and civilization is advanced by the 
 silent influence of woman. 
 
 This influence is due not exclusively to the fasci- 
 nation of her charms, but to the strength, uniformity, 
 and consistency of her virtues, maintained under so 
 many sacrifices and with so much fortitude and hero- 
 ism. Without these endowments and qualifications, 
 external attractions are nothing ; but with them, their 
 power is irresistible. Beauty and virtue are the 
 crowning attributes bestowed by nature upon woman, 
 and the bounty of Heaven more than compensates 
 for the injustice of man. The possession of these 
 advantages secures to her universally that degree 
 of homage and consideration which renders her inde- 
 pendent of the effect of unequal and arbitrary laws. 
 But it is not the incense of idol-worship which is most 
 acceptable to the heart of woman ; it is the courtesy, 
 and just appreciation of her proper position, merit, 
 and character. Woman surpasses man in the quick- 
 ness of her perception and in the right direction of 
 her sympathies ; and thus it is justly due to her praise 
 that the credit of her acknowledged ascendency is 
 personal amidst the increasing degeneracy of man. 
 
WOMANHOOD. 85 
 
 Woman is the conservator of morality and re- 
 ligion. Her moral worth holds man in some restraint, 
 and preserves his ways from becoming inhumanly 
 corrupt. Mighty is the power of woman in this re- 
 spect. Every virtue in woman has its influence on 
 the world. A brother, husband, friend, or son is 
 touched by its sunshine. Its mild beneficence is not 
 lost. A virtuous woman in the seclusion of her home, 
 breathing the sweet influence of virtue into the hearts 
 and lives of its loved ones, is an evangel of goodness 
 to the world. She is a pillar of the external kingdom 
 of right. She is a star, shining in the moral firma- 
 ment. She is a priestess, administering at the fount- 
 ain of life. Every prayer she breathes is answered, 
 in a greater or less degree, in the hearts and lives 
 of those she loves. Her heart is an altar-fire, where 
 religion acquires strength to go out on its mission 
 of mercy. 
 
 We can not overestimate the strength and power 
 of woman's moral and religious character. The 
 world would go to ruin without her. With all our 
 ministers and Churches, and Bibles and sermons, 
 man would be a prodigal without the restraint of 
 woman's virtue and the consecration of her religion. 
 Woman first lays her hand on our young faces ; she 
 plants the first seeds ; she makes the first impres- 
 sions ; and all along through life she scatters the 
 good seeds of her kindness, and sprinkles them with 
 the dews of her piety. 
 
 A woman of true intelligence is a blessing at 
 home, in her circle of friends, and in society. Wher- 
 
86 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 ever she goes she carries with her a health-giving 
 influence. There is a beautiful harmony about her 
 character that at once inspires a respect which soon 
 warms into love. The influence of such a woman 
 upon society is of the most salutary kind. She 
 strengthens right principles in the virtuous, incites 
 the selfish and indifferent to good actions, and gives 
 to the light and frivolous a taste after something 
 more substantial than the frothy gossip with which 
 they seek to recreate themselves. 
 
 Many a woman does the work of her life without 
 being noticed or seen by the world. The world sees 
 a family reared to virtue, one child after another 
 growing into Christian manhood or womanhood, and 
 at last it sees them gathered around the grave where 
 the mother that bore them rests from her labors. 
 But the world has never seen the quiet woman labor- 
 ing for her children, making their clothes, providing 
 them food, teaching them their prayers, and making 
 their homes comfortable and happy. 
 
 A woman's happiness flows to her from sources 
 and through channels different from those that give 
 origin and conduct to the happiness of man, and in 
 a measure will continue to do so forever. Her fac- 
 ulties bend their exercise toward different issues, her 
 social and spiritual notions demand a different ali- 
 ment. Her powers are eminently practical. She has 
 a rich store of practical good sense, an ample fund 
 of tact, skill, shrewdness, inventiveness, and manage- 
 ment. It is her work to form the young mind, to 
 give it direction and instruction, to develop its love 
 
WOMANHOOD. 87 
 
 for the good and true. It is her work to make home 
 happy, to nourish all the virtues, and instill all the 
 sweetness which builds men up into good citizens. 
 She is the consoler of the world, attending it in sick- 
 ness ; her society soothes the world after its toils, 
 and rewards it for its perplexities. They receive the 
 infant when it enters upon its existence, and drape 
 the cold form of the aged when life is passed. They 
 assuage the sorrows of childhood, and minister to 
 the poor and distressed. 
 
 Loveliness of spirit is woman's scepter and sword ; 
 for it is both the emblem and the instrument of her 
 conquest. Her influence flows from her sensibilities, 
 her gentleness, and her tenderness. It is this which 
 disarms prejudice, and awakens confidence and affec- 
 tion in all who come within her sphere, which makes 
 her more powerful to accomplish what her will has 
 resolved than if nature had endowed her with the 
 strength of a giant. As a wife and mother, woman 
 is seen in her most sacred and dignified aspect. As 
 such she has great influence over the characters of 
 individuals, over the condition of families, and over 
 the destinies of empires. 
 
 How transitory are the days of girlhood ! The 
 time when the cheerful smile, the merry laugh, and 
 the exulting voice were so many expressions of 
 happiness, — how quickly it passed ! How time has 
 multiplied its scores, and accumulated its unwel- 
 come effects against the charms and attractions of 
 youth ! But if the heart be chilled, if the cheek be 
 more pale, and the eye less bright ; if the outward 
 
88 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 adornment of the temple of love have become faded 
 and dimmed, there may be yet inwardly preserved 
 the shrine where is laid up the sacred treasures of 
 loveliness and purity, gentleness and grace, the at- 
 tempered qualities of tried and perfected virtues : as 
 if the blossoms of early childhood had ripened into 
 the mellow and precious fruits of autumnal time. 
 
 But in another and better sense a good woman 
 never grows old. Years may pass over her head, 
 but if benevolence and virtue dwell in her heart she 
 is as cheerful as when the spring of life first opened 
 to her view. When we look at a good woman we 
 never think of her age ; she looks as happy as when 
 the rose first bloomed on her cheek. In her neigh- 
 borhood she is a friend and benefactor ; in the Church, 
 the devout worshiper and exemplary Christian. Who 
 does not love and respect the woman who has spent 
 her days in acts of kindness and mercy, who has 
 been the friend of sorrowing ones, whose life has 
 been a scene of kindness and love, devotion to truth 
 and religion. Such a woman can not grow old ; she 
 will always be fresh and beautiful in her spirits and 
 active in her humble deeds of mercy and benevolence. 
 
 If the young lady desires to retain the bloom and 
 beauty of youth, let her not yield to the way of fash- 
 ion and folly ; let her love truth and virtue ; and to 
 the close of her life will she retain those feelings 
 which now make life appear a garden of sweets ever 
 fresh and green. 
 
HOME HARMONIES. . 89 
 
 [AN there be a more important theme to claim 
 * the attention of thinking parents than that of 
 home harmonies, how to make the home life so 
 pleasant and full of kindly courtesy that its mem- 
 bers will look to it as the pleasantest spot on earth, 
 and find their highest enjoyment in advancing the 
 innocent pleasures of home ? Is it not the duty of 
 parents to make their homes as pleasant as they 
 possibly can for their children and their mates? 
 Should they not strive to have them resound with 
 the fun and frolic of childhood, and enlivened with 
 the cheerfulness of happy social life ? For too many 
 homes are like the frame of a harp that stands 
 without strings. In form and outline they suggest 
 music, but no melody arises from the empty spaces ; 
 and thus it happens that home is unattractive, dreary, 
 and dull. 
 
 And do you, fathers and mothers, you who 
 have sons and daughters growing up around you, do 
 you ever think of your responsibility of keeping alive 
 the home feeling in the hearts of your children ? Re- 
 member that within your means the obligation rests 
 upon you of making their homes the pleasantest spot 
 on earth, to make the word home to them the synonym 
 of happiness. Go to as great length as you consist- 
 ently can to provide for them those amusements, 
 which, if not provided there, entice them elsewhere. 
 You had better spend your money thus than in osten- 
 
90 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 tation and luxury, and far better than to amass a for- 
 tune for your children to spend in the future. The 
 richest legacy you can leave your child is a life-long, 
 inextinguishable, and fragrant recollection of home 
 when time and death have forever dissolved the en- 
 chantment. 
 
 Give him that, and on the strength of that will he 
 make his way in the world ; but let his recollection 
 of home be repulsive, and the fortune you may leave 
 him will be a poor compensation for the loss of that 
 tenderness of heart and purity of life, which not only 
 a pleasant home, but the memory of one would have 
 secured. Remember, also, that while they will feel 
 grateful to you for the money you may leave them, 
 and will think of you when gone, they will go to your 
 green graves and bless your very ashes for that sanc- 
 tuary of quiet comfort and refinement, to which you 
 may, if you possess the means, transform your home. 
 The memory of the beautiful and happy homes of 
 childhood will in after years come to the weary mind 
 like strains of low, sweet music, and in its silent influ- 
 ence for good will prove of infinite more value than 
 houses, stocks, and money. 
 
 Too frequently the effect of prosperity is to render 
 the heart cold and selfish ; but the heart will never 
 forget the hallowed influence of happy home memo- 
 ries. It will be an evening enjoyment to which the 
 lapse of years will only add new sweetness. Such a 
 home memory is a constant inspiration for good, and 
 as constant a restraint from evil. A constant en- 
 deavor should be made to render every home cheerful. 
 
HOME HARMONIES. 91 
 
 Innocent joy should reign in every heart. There 
 should be found domestic amusements, fireside pleas- 
 ures, quiet and simple they may be, but such as shall 
 make home happy, and not leave it that irksome 
 place that will oblige the youthful spirit to look else- 
 where for joy. 
 
 There are a thousand unobtrusive ways in which 
 we may add to the cheerfulness of home. The very 
 modulations of the voice will often make a wonderful 
 difference. How many shades of feeling are ex- 
 pressed by the voice ! What a change comes over 
 us by a change of tones ! No delicately tuned harp- 
 string can awaken more pleasures, no grating discord 
 can pierce with more pain. It is practicable to make 
 home so delightful that children shall have no disposi- 
 tion to wander from it or prefer any other place. It 
 is possible to make it so attractive that it shall not 
 only firmly hold its own loved ones, but shall draw 
 others into its cheerful circle. Let the house all day 
 long be the scene of pleasant looks, pleasant words, 
 kind and affectionate acts ; let the table be the happy 
 eating-place of a merry group, and not simply a dull 
 board where the members come to eat. Let the 
 sitting-room at evening be the place where a merry 
 company settle themselves to books and games, till 
 the round of good-night kisses are in order. Let 
 there be some music in the household, not kept to 
 show to company, but music in which all can join. 
 Let the young companions be welcomed and made for 
 the time a part of the group. In a word, let the 
 home be surrounded by an air of cozy and cheerful 
 
92 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 good-will. Then children will not be exhorted to love 
 it ; you will not be able to tempt them away from it. 
 
 To the man of business home should be an earthly 
 paradise, to the embellishment of which his leisure 
 time and thoughts might well be devoted. Life is 
 certainly a pleasanter thing if the inevitable daily 
 drudgery be relieved by a little lightness, brightness, 
 and intelligent enjoyment. The craving for amuse- 
 ment is a natural one, and within proper bounds it 
 ought to be gratified. And there is surely no better 
 entertainment for the spare hours of an intelligent 
 man than the embellishment of his home, so that it 
 will be an agreeable place for himself and his family 
 to dwell in, and for his friends to visit. He may be 
 assured that his children as they grow up will become 
 better men and women, and more useful members of 
 society, if they live in a home which is itself a work 
 of art, and in which they are surrounded by objects 
 stimulative to the intellect, the imagination, and to all 
 the better feelings of their natures. 
 
 This making home a work of art is not a piece of 
 sentimentalism, but it is one which ought to address 
 itself in the strongest manner to the minds of all 
 practical people. There is nothing better worthy of 
 adornment than the house we live in ; and a home 
 arranged and fitted up with taste will be better cared 
 for, it will beget habits of greater neatness, it will 
 inspire nobler thoughts, it will exert a pleasanter 
 influence, not only on its inmates, but on the 
 whole neighborhood, than one fitted with the cost- 
 liest objects selected with indiscrimination, without 
 
HOME HARMONIES. 93 
 
 plan, and merely for the purpose of ostentatious 
 display. 
 
 It has been said that there is sure to be content- 
 ment in a home in the windows of which can be seen 
 birds and flowers, and it may also be said that there 
 will be the same conditions wherever there are pic- 
 tures on the walls. A room without pictures is like 
 a room without windows. Pictures are loop-holes of 
 escape to the soul, leading to other scenes and other 
 spheres. They are consolers of loneliness, they are 
 books, they are histories and sermons which we can 
 read without turning over the leaves. The sweet 
 influence of flowers is no less than that of paintings. 
 At all seasons of the year they are gladly welcomed. 
 They are emblematic of both the joys and sorrows of 
 life, and religion has associated them with the highest 
 spiritual verities. Faded though they may sometimes 
 be, they have the power to wake the chords of mem- 
 ory and make us children again. At the sick-bed 
 and marriage feast, on altar and cathedral walls they 
 have a meaning, and the humblest home looks brighter 
 where they bloom. 
 
 Many a child goes astray, not because there is a 
 want of prayers or virtue at home, but simply because 
 home lacks sunshine. A child needs smiles as much 
 as flowers sunbeams. Children look little beyond 
 the present moment. If a thing pleases them they 
 are apt to seek it, if it displeases they are prone 
 to avoid it. Children are great imitators, and are 
 never so happy as when trying to do what they see 
 other people do. Their plays consist in copying ac- 
 
94 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 tual affairs of the older ones, and these amusements 
 often really prepare the children for the actual busi- 
 ness of life, so that they may sooner become helpful 
 to their parents. They should be watched and en- 
 couraged, therefore, in their plays to habits of thought- 
 fulness and self-reliance. It is to be hoped that games 
 of skill, which shall try the wit and patience of both 
 parents and children, will become the fashion of the 
 times, until every home in the land shall be supplied 
 with these accessories of pleasure, until every child 
 shall have in his father's house, be it humble or 
 costly, such appliances and helps for his entertain- 
 ment that he shall find his amusements under his 
 father's roof and in his father's presence. 
 
 Among home amusements the best is the good 
 old habit of conversation, the talking over the events 
 of the day in bright and quick play of wit and fancy, 
 the story which brings the laugh, and the speaking 
 the good, kind, and true things which all have in their 
 hearts. Conversation is the sunshine of the mind, 
 an intellectual orchestra where all the instruments 
 should bear a part. Cultivate singing in the family. 
 The songs and hymns your childhood sung, bring 
 them all back to your memory, and teach them to 
 the little ones. Mix them all together, to meet the 
 varying moods as, in after life, they come over us so 
 mysteriously. Is it not singular what trifles some- 
 times serve to wake the memories of youth ? And 
 what more often than snatches of olden songs not 
 heard for many years, but which used to come from 
 lips now closed forever? Thus the home songs not 
 
HOME HARMONIES. 95 
 
 only serve to make the present home life happy and 
 agreeable, but the very memory of it will serve as a 
 shield of defense in times of trial and temptation. 
 At times, amid the crushing mishaps of business, a 
 song of the olden time breaks in upon the weary 
 thoughts and guides the mind into another channel — 
 light breaks from behind the cloud in the sky, and 
 new courage is. given us. 
 
 Parents do well to study the character of the 
 younger ones. The majority of parents do not un- 
 derstand their children. They are kept under re- 
 straint, and are not properly developed ; they live a 
 life of fear rather than of love, which should not be. 
 Home should be the bright sanctuary of our hearts, 
 the repository of all our thoughts. Have confidence 
 in each other, and the seeds properly sown will spring 
 forth with fruits that will bud and blossom, but never 
 die. What is comparable to a well regulated, happy 
 home ? It is our heaven below, where each thought 
 will vibrate in perfect unison. 
 
 In the great majority of cases it will be found that 
 the frequenters of saloons and places of low resort 
 have not pleasant homes. It should be the duty of 
 all to strive to make home so happy that each even- 
 ing will furnish pleasant memories to lighten the load 
 of another day. Make it so happy that you do not 
 tire of it, but long for the hour when your day's toil 
 is over, and you desire to reach it as the happiest and 
 dearest place on earth. Parents should more ear- 
 nestly consider the importance of home culture, home 
 happiness, home love. The latter should be the rul- 
 
96 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 ing element, for all the household is moved by the 
 surrounding influences, and when a spirit of love 
 broods over the household, how kind, gentle, and 
 considerate do all its members become ! 
 
 There are some persons who apparently live more 
 for the admiration of others than for their own house- 
 hold, and have a smile for all but those who should be 
 the nearest and dearest. This is almost criminally 
 wrong ; they could take no surer course to make a 
 complete wreck of their own happiness and the home 
 happiness. Whatever vexatious troubles parents 
 meet in their daily life, it is their duty no less than it 
 should be their chief pleasure to strive, as far as pos- 
 sible, to throw around the home an atmosphere of joy 
 and happiness, to make home the dearest spot on 
 earth, so that when, with the passage of years, the 
 children go from thence to new and untried scenes, 
 the memory of home will bring to the heart a thrill 
 of joyful recollections, and thus give them a new cour- 
 age to take up the burden of life. 
 
HOME DUTIES. 97 
 
 JfO]^ Derail*;?. 
 
 "And say to mothers what a holy charge 
 Is theirs; with what a kingly power their love 
 Might rule the fountains of the new-born mind; 
 Warn them to wake at early dawn and sow 
 Good seed before the world has sown its tares." 
 
 — Mrs. Sigourney. 
 
 jUTY embraces man's whole existence. It begins 
 in the home, where there is the duty which 
 children owe to their parents on the one hand, 
 and the duty which parents owe their children 
 on the other. There surely can be no more important 
 duties to ponder over long and earnestly than those 
 relating to the home, the duty of patience, of courtesy 
 one to the other, the interest in each other's welfare, 
 the duty of self-control, of learning to bear and forbear. 
 One danger of home life springs from its famil- 
 iarity. Kindred hearts at a common fireside are far 
 too apt to relax from the proprieties of social life. 
 Careless language and careless attire are too apt 
 to be indulged in when the eye of the world is 
 shut off, the ear of the world can not hear. There 
 should be no stiffness of family etiquette, no stern- 
 ness of family discipline, like that which prevailed in 
 olden times — the day for that is passed. But the 
 day for thorough civility and courtesy among the 
 members of a home, the day for careful propriety of 
 dress and address, will never pass away. It is here 
 that the truest and most faultless social life is to be 
 
 lived ; it is here that such a life is to be learned. A 
 
 7 
 
98 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 home in which true courtesy and politeness reigns is 
 a home from which polite men and women go forth, 
 and they go out directly from no other. It should 
 be remembered that it is at home, in the family, and 
 among kindred, that an every-day politeness of man- 
 ner is really most to be prized ; there it confers sub- 
 stantial benefits and brings the sweetest returns. 
 The little attentions which members of the same 
 household may show towards one another, day by 
 day, belong to what is styled "good manners." 
 There can not be any ingrained gentility which does 
 not exhibit itself first at home. 
 
 Children should be trained to behave at home as 
 you would have them behave abroad. It is the home 
 life which they act out when away. If this is rude, 
 gruff, and lacking in civility, they will be lacking in 
 all that constitutes true refinement, and thus most 
 painfully reflect on the home training when in the 
 presence of strangers. In the actions of children 
 strangers can read a history of the home life. It 
 tells of duty undone, of turmoil and strife, of fretful 
 women and impatient men ; or, it speaks of a home 
 of love and peace, where patience sits enthroned in 
 the hearts of all its members, and each is mindful of 
 his or her duty towards the other. 
 
 Let the wives and daughters of business men 
 think of the toils, the anxieties, the mortification and 
 wear that fathers undergo to secure for them com- 
 fortable homes. Is it not their duty to compensate 
 them for these trials by making them happy at their 
 own fireside? Happy is he who can find solace and 
 
HOME DUTIES. 99 
 
 comfort at home. And husbands, too, do not think 
 enough of the thousand trials and petty, vexatious 
 incidents of the daily home life to which wives are 
 subject. True, they themselves feel the harassing 
 incidents of business, which may be of more imme- 
 diate importance than the cares of home. But one 
 large worry is preferable to many small ones. Thus 
 it is the duty of each to remember these facts, and 
 strive to make the home life happy by mutual self- 
 sacrifice. 
 
 Something is wrong in those homes where the 
 little courtesies of speech are ignored in the every- 
 day home life. When the family gather alone around 
 the breakfast or dinner table the same courtesy 
 should prevail as if guests were present. Reproof, 
 complaint, unpleasant discussion, and sarcasm, no 
 less than moody silence, should be banished. Let 
 the conversation be genial and suited to the little 
 folks as far as possible. Interesting incidents of the 
 day's experience may be mentioned at the evening 
 meal, thus arousing the social element. If resources 
 fail sometimes little extracts read from evening or 
 morning papers will kindle the conversation. Scold- 
 ing is never allowable; reproof and criticism from 
 parents must have their time and place, but should 
 never intrude so far upon the social life of the family 
 as to render the home uncomfortable. A serious 
 word in private will generally cure a fault more 
 easily than many public criticisms. In some families 
 a spirit of contradiction and discussion mars the 
 harmony ; every statement is, as it were, dissected, 
 
100 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 and the absolute correctness of every word calcu- 
 lated. It interferes seriously with social freedom 
 where unimportant social inaccuracies are watched 
 for and exposed for the sake of exposure. 
 
 Never think any thing which affects the happiness 
 of your children too small a matter to claim your 
 attention. Use every means in your power to win 
 and retain their confidence. Do not rest satisfied 
 without some account of each day's joys or sorrows. 
 It is a source of great comfort to the innocent child 
 to tell all its troubles to mother, and the mother 
 should haste to lend a willing ear. Soothe and quiet 
 its little heart after the experience of the day. It 
 has had its disappointments and trials, as well as its 
 plays and pleasures ; it is ready to throw its arms 
 around the mother's neck, and forgetting the one 
 live again the other. Always send the little child to 
 bed happy. Whatever cares may trouble your mind 
 give the little one a good-night kiss as-it goes to its 
 pillow. The memory of this in the stormy years 
 which may be in store for it will be like Bethlehem's 
 star to the bewildered shepherd, and the heart will 
 receive a fresh inspiration of courage at the thrill of 
 youthful memories. 
 
 The domestic fireside is a seminary of infinite 
 importance. It is important because it is universal, 
 and because the education it bestows, woven with the 
 woof of childhood, gives color to the whole texture 
 of life. Early impressions are not easily erased ; the 
 virgin wax is faithful to the signet, and subsequent 
 impressions serve rather to indent the former one* 
 
HOME DUTIES. 101 
 
 There are but few who can receive the honors of a 
 college education, but all are graduates of the heart. 
 The learning of the university may fade from recollec- 
 tion, its classic lore may be lost from the halls of 
 memory ; but the simple lessons of home, enameled 
 upon the heart of childhood, defy the rust of years, 
 and outlive the more mature but less vivid pictures 
 of after days. So deep, so lasting are the impres- 
 sions of early life that you often see a man in the 
 imbecility of age holding fresh in his recollection the 
 events of childhood, while all the wide space between 
 that and the present hour is a forgotten waste. 
 
 Those parents act most wisely who have fore- 
 thought enough to provide not only for the youth, 
 but for the age of their offspring; who teach them 
 usefulness, and not to expect too much from the 
 world ; to become early familiarized with the stern 
 and actual realities of life, and never to be apes of 
 fashion nor parasites of greatness. Parents, then, 
 should educate their children not merely in scholastic 
 acquirements, but in a knowledge of the respective 
 positions they are to occupy when they become men 
 and women. Educate them to the duties that the 
 world will require of them when they arrive at that 
 long looked for period when they will have reached 
 maturity, and enter into the game that every person 
 must play during his existence in the world. Edu- 
 cate the girl to the intricate duties that will be re- 
 quired of her as a wife and mother, and to the 
 position she is to occupy in society, and that it rests 
 with herself whether it shall be exalted or whether 
 
102 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 it shall be debased and lowly. Educate the boy to 
 a knowledge of what the busy world will require of 
 him; teach him self-reliance and all manly attributes. 
 
 A knowledge of the world is more than necessary 
 to enable us to live in it wisely, and this knowledge 
 should commence in the nursery. It must be remem- 
 bered that the largest and most important part of 
 the education of children, whether for good or evil, 
 is carried on at home, often unconsciously in their 
 amusements, and under the daily influence of what 
 they see and hear about them. It is there that 
 subtle brains and lissome fingers find scope and learn 
 to promote the well-being of the community. One 
 can not tell what duties their children may be called 
 to perform in after life. They must teach them to 
 cultivate their faculties, and to exercise all their 
 senses to choose the good and refuse the evil. 
 
 Above all things, teach children what life is. It 
 is not simply breathing and moving. Life is a battle, 
 and all thoughtful people see it so, — a battle be- 
 tween good and evil from childhood. Good influence 
 drawing us up toward the divine, bad influence draw- 
 ing us down to the brute. Teach children that they 
 lead two lives, the life without and the life within ; 
 that the inside must be pure in the sight of God, as 
 well as the outside in the sight of man. Educate 
 them, then, to love the good and true, and remem- 
 ber that every word spoken within the hearing of 
 little children tends toward the formation of character. 
 Teach little children to love the beautiful. If you 
 are able, give them a corner in the garden for flow- 
 
HOME DUTIES. 103 
 
 ers, allow them to have their favorite trees. Teach 
 them to wander in the prettiest woodlets, show them 
 where they best can view the sunset. Buy them 
 pictures, and encourage them to deck their rooms in 
 their childish way. Thus may the mother weave into 
 the life of her children thoughts and feelings, rich, 
 beautiful, grand, and noble, which will make all after 
 life brighter and better. 
 
 The duties of children to parents are far too little 
 considered. As the children grow up the parents 
 lean on them much earlier than either imagine. In 
 the passage of years the children gain experience 
 and strength. But with the parents ! The cares of 
 a long life bow the form, and the strong are again 
 made weak. It is now that the duties of children 
 assume their grandest forms. It is not sufficient to 
 simply give them a home to make their declining 
 years comfortable. While supplying their physical 
 wants, their hearts may be famishing for some expres- 
 sion of love from you. If you think they have out- 
 grown these desires, you are mistaken. Every little 
 attention you can show your mother — your escort to 
 Church or concert, or for a quiet walk — brings back 
 the youth of her heart ; her cheeks glow with pleasure, 
 and she feels happy for such a dutiful son. The 
 father, occupied and absorbed as he may be, is not 
 wholly indifferent to the filial expressions of devoted 
 love. He may pretend to care but very little for 
 them ; but, having faith in their sincerity, it would 
 give him pain were they entirely withheld. Fathers 
 need their sons quite as much as the sons need the 
 
104 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 fathers ; but in how many deplorable instances do 
 they fail to find in them a staff for their declining 
 years ! 
 
 You may disappoint the ambition of your parents, 
 you may be unable to distinguish yourself as you 
 fondly hoped ; but let this not swerve you from a de- 
 termination to be a son of whose moral character they 
 need never be ashamed. Begin early to cultivate a 
 habit of thoughtfulness and consideration for others, 
 especially for those you are commanded to honor. 
 Can you begrudge a few extra steps for the mother who 
 never stopped to number those you demanded during 
 your helpless infancy? Have you the heart to slight 
 her requests or treat her remarks with indifference, 
 when you can not begin to measure the patient devo- 
 tion with which she bore your peculiarities? Antici- 
 pate her wants, invite her confidence, be prompt to 
 offer assistance, express your affections as heartily 
 as you did when a child, that the mother may never 
 have occasion to grieve in secret for the child she 
 has lost. 
 
 Km og tag*!. 
 
 (T is the aim that makes the man, and without this 
 he is nothing as far as the utter destitution of 
 force, weight, and even individuality among men 
 can reduce him to nonentity. The strong gusts 
 and currents of the world sweep him this way and 
 that, without steam or sail to impel, or helm to guide 
 
AIM OF LIFE. 105 
 
 him. If he be not speedily wrecked or run aground, 
 it is more his good fortune than good management. 
 We have never heard a more touching confession of 
 utter weakness and misery than these words from 
 one singularly blessed with the endowments of nature 
 and of Providence: " My life is aimless." 
 
 Take heed, young man, of an aimless life. Take 
 heed, too, of a low and sordid aim. "A well-ascer- 
 tained and generous purpose gives vigor, direction, 
 and perseverance to all man's efforts. Its concomi- 
 tants are a well-disciplined intellect, character, influ- 
 ence, tranquillity, and cheerfulness within — success 
 and honor without. Whatever a man's talents and 
 advantages may be, with no aim, or a low one, he is 
 weak and despicable ; and he can not be otherwise 
 than respectable and influential with a high one. 
 Without some definite object before us, some stand- 
 ard which we are earnestly striving to reach, we can 
 not expect to attain to any great height, either men- 
 tally or morally. Placing for ourselves high stand- 
 ards, and wishing to reach them without any further 
 effort on our part, is not enough to elevate us in any 
 very great degree. 
 
 Some one has said, "Nature holds for each of us 
 all that we need to make us useful and happy ; but 
 she requires us to labor for all that we get." God 
 gives nothing of value unto man unmatched by need 
 of labor ; and we can expect to overcome difficulties 
 only by strong and determined efforts. Here is a 
 great and noble work lying just before us, just as 
 the blue ocean lies out beyond the rocks which line 
 
106 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 the shore. In our strivings for "something better 
 than we have known" we should work for others' 
 good rather than our own pleasure. Those whose 
 object in life is their own happiness find at last that 
 their lives are sad failures. 
 
 We need to do something each day that shall 
 help us to a larger life of soul ; and every word or 
 deed which brings joy or gladness to other hearts 
 lifts us nearer a perfect life ; for a noble deed is a 
 step toward God. To live for something worthy of 
 life involves the necessity of an intelligent and defi- 
 nite plan of action. More than splendid dreamings 
 or magnificent resolves is necessary to success in the 
 objects and ambitions of life. Men come to the best 
 results in every department of effort only as they 
 thoughtfully plan and earnestly toil in given direc- 
 tions. Purposes without work is dead. It were vain 
 to hope for good results from mere plans. Random 
 or spasmodic efforts, like aimless shoots, are gener- 
 ally no better than wasted time or strength. The 
 purposes of shrewd men in the business of this life 
 are always followed by careful plans, enforced by 
 work. Whether the object is learning, honor, or 
 wealth, the ways and means are always laid out ac- 
 cording to the best rules and methods. The mariner 
 has his chart, the architect his plans, the sculptor his 
 model, and all as a means and condition of success. 
 Inventive genius, or even what is called inspiration, 
 can do little in any department of the theoretic or 
 practical science except as it works by a well-formed 
 plan ; then every step is an advance towards the 
 
AIM OF LIFE. 107 
 
 accomplishment of its object. Every tack of the ship 
 made in accordance with nautical law keeps her 
 steadily nearing the port. Each stroke of the chisel 
 brings the marble into a clearer likeness to the 
 model. No effort or time is lost ; for nothing is done 
 rashly or at random. 
 
 Thus, in the grand aim of life, if some worthy 
 purpose be kept constantly in view, and for its accom- 
 plishment every effort be made every day of your life, 
 you will, unconsciously, perhaps, approach the goal of 
 your ambition. There can be no question among the 
 philosophic observers of men and events that fixed- 
 ness of purpose is a grand element of human success. 
 When a man has formed in his mind a great sover- 
 eign purpose, it governs his conduct as the laws of 
 nature govern the operation of physical things. 
 
 Every one should have a mark in view, and pur- 
 sue it steadily. He should not be turned from his 
 course by other objects ever so attractive. Life is 
 not long enough for any one man to accomplish every 
 thing. Indeed, but few can at best accomplish more 
 than one thing well. Many- — alas ! very many — ac- 
 complish nothing. Yet there is not a man, endowed 
 with ordinary intellect or accomplishments, but can 
 accomplish at least one useful, important, worthy 
 purpose. It was not without reason that some of 
 the greatest of men were trained from their youth to 
 choose some definite object in life, to which they 
 were required to direct their thoughts and to devote 
 all their energies. It became, therefore, a sole and 
 ruling purpose of their hearts, and was almost cer- 
 
108 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 tainly the means of their future advancement and 
 happiness in the world. 
 
 Of the thousands of men who are annually com- 
 ing upon the stage of life there are few who escape 
 the necessity of adopting some profession or calling ; 
 and there are fewer still who, if they knew the mis- 
 eries of idleness — tenfold keener and more numerous 
 than those of the most laborious profession — would 
 ever desire such an escape. First of all, a choice 
 of business or occupation should be made, and made 
 early, with a wise reference to capacity and taste. 
 The youth should be educated for it and, as far as 
 possible, in it ; and when this is done it should be pur- 
 sued with industry, energy, and enthusiasm, which 
 will warrant success. 
 
 This choice of an occupation depends partly upon 
 the individual preference and partly upon circum- 
 stances. It may be that you are debarred from enter- 
 ing upon that business for which you are best adapted. 
 In that case make the best choice in your power, ap- 
 ply yourself faithfully and earnestly to whatever you 
 undertake, and you can not well help achieving a 
 success. Patient application sometimes leads to great 
 results. No man should be discouraged because he 
 does not get on rapidly in his calling from the start. 
 In the more intellectual professions especially it 
 should be remembered that a solid character is not 
 the growth of a day, that the mental faculties are not 
 matured except by long and laborious culture. 
 
 To refine the taste, to fortify the reasoning fac- 
 ulty with its appropriate discipline, to store the cells 
 
AIM OF LIFE. 109 
 
 of memory with varied and useful learning, to train 
 all the powers of the mind systematically, is the 
 work of calm and studious years. A young man's 
 education has been of but little use to him if it has 
 not taught him to check the fretful impatience, the 
 eager haste to drink the cup of life, the desire to 
 exhaust the intoxicating draught of ambition. He 
 should set his aim so high that it will require patient 
 years of toil to reach it. If he can reach it at a 
 bound it is unworthy of him. It should be of such 
 a nature that he feels the necessity of husbanding 
 his resources. 
 
 You will receive all sorts of the most excellent 
 advice, but you must do your own deciding. You 
 have to take care of yourself in this world, and you 
 may as well take your own way of doing it. But if 
 a change of business is desired be sure the fault is 
 with the business and not the individual. For run- 
 ning hither and thither generally makes sorry work, 
 and brings to poverty ere the sands of life are half 
 run. The North, South, East, and West furnish 
 vast fields for enterprise ; but of what avail for the 
 seeker to visit the four corners of the world if he 
 still is dissatisfied, and returns home with empty 
 pockets and idle hands, thinking that the world is 
 wrong and that he himself is a misused and shame- 
 fully imposed-on creature? The world, smiling at 
 the rebuff, moves on, while he lags behind, groaning 
 over misusage, without sufficient energy to roll up 
 his sleeves and fight his way through. 
 
 A second profession seldom succeeds, not because 
 
110 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 a man may not make himself fully equal to its du- 
 ties, but because the world will not readily believe 
 he is so. The world argues thus : he that has failed 
 in his first profession, to which he dedicated the 
 morning of his life and the Spring-time of his exer- 
 tion, is not the most likely person to master a sec- 
 ond. To this it might be replied that a man's first 
 profession is often chosen for him by others ; his 
 second he usually decides upon for himself; therefore, 
 his failure in his first profession may, for what he 
 knows, be mainly owing to the sincere but mistaken 
 attention he was constantly paying to his second. 
 
 Ever remember that it is not your trade or pro- 
 fession that makes you respectable. Manhood and 
 profession or handicraft are entirely different things. 
 An occupation is never an end of life. It is an 
 instrument put into our hands by which to gain for 
 the body the means of living until sickness or old 
 age robs it of life, and we pass on to the world for 
 which this is a preparation. The great purpose of 
 living is twofold in character. The one should never 
 change from the time reason takes the helm ; it is to 
 live a life of manliness, of purity and honor. To 
 live such a life that, whether rich or poor, your 
 neighbors will honor and respect you as a man of 
 sterling principles. The other is to have some busi- 
 ness, in the due performance of which you are to 
 put forth all your exertions. It matters not so much 
 what it is as whether it be honorable, and it may 
 change to suit the varying change of circumstances. 
 When these two objects — character and a high aim — 
 
SUCCESS OR FAILURE. Ill 
 
 are fairly before a youth, what then ? He must strive 
 to attain those objects. He must work as well as 
 dream, labor as well as pray. His hand must be as 
 stout as his heart, his arm as strong as his head. 
 Purpose must be followed by action. Then is he 
 living and acting worthily, as becomes a human be- 
 ing with great destinies in store for him. 
 
 ?#ee^?s os sjaoiin^. 
 
 |JlJjj§ANKIND every-where are desirous of achiev- 
 ing a success, of making the most of life. At 
 times, it is true, they act as if they little cared 
 what was the outcome of their exertions. But 
 even in the lives of the most abandoned and reckless 
 there are moments when their good angel points out 
 to them the heights to which they might ascend, that 
 a wish arises for 
 
 "Something better than they have known." 
 
 But, alas ! they have not the will to make the neces- 
 sary exertions. 
 
 We are confronted with two ends — success or 
 failure. To win the former it requires of us labor 
 and perseverance. We must remember that those 
 who start for glory must imitate the mettled hounds 
 of Acton, and must pursue the game not only where 
 there is a path, but where there is none. They must 
 be able to simulate and to dissimulate ; to leap and to 
 
112 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 creep ; to conquer the earth like Caesar ; to fall down 
 and kiss it like Brutus ; to throw their sword, like 
 Brennus, into the trembling scale; or, like Nelson, 
 to snatch the laurels from the doubtful hand of victory 
 while she is hesitating where to bestow them. He 
 that would win success in life must make Persever- 
 ance his bosom friend, Experience his wise counselor, 
 Caution his elder brother, and Hope his guardian 
 genius. He must not repine because the fates are 
 sometimes against him, but when he trips or falls let 
 him, like Caesar when he stumbled on shore, stum- 
 ble forward, and, by escaping the omen, change its 
 nature and meaning. Remembering that those very 
 circumstances which are apt to be abused as the 
 palliatives of failure are the true tests of merit, let 
 him gird up his loins for whatever in the mysterious 
 economy of the future may await him. Thus will he 
 rise superior to ill-fortune, and becoming daily more 
 and more impassive to its attacks, will learn to force 
 his way in spite of it, till, at last, he will be able to 
 fashion his luck to his will. 
 
 "Life is too short/' says a shrewd thinker, "for 
 us to waste one moment in deploring our lot. We 
 must go after success, since it will not come to us, 
 and we have no time to spare." If you wish to suc- 
 ceed, you must do as you would to get in through a 
 crowd to a gate all are anxious to reach — hold your 
 ground and push hard ; to stand still is to give up 
 the battle. Give your energies to the highest em- 
 ployment of which your nature is capable. Be alive, 
 be patient, work hard, watch opportunities, be rigidly 
 
SUCCESS OB FAILURE. 113 
 
 honest, hope for the best ; and if you are not able to 
 reach the goal of your ambition, which is possible in 
 spite of your utmost efforts, you will die with the con- 
 sciousness of having done your best, which is after all 
 the truest success to which man can aspire. 
 
 As manhood dawns and the young man catches 
 its first lights, the pinnacles of realized dreams, the 
 golden domes of high possibilities, and the purpling 
 hills of great delights, _and then looks down upon the 
 narrow, sinuous, long, and dusty paths by which 
 others have reached them, he is apt to be disgusted 
 with the passage, and to seek for success through 
 broader channels and by quicker means. To begin 
 at the foot of the hills and work slowly to the top 
 seems a very discouraging process, and here it is 
 that thousands of young men have made shipwreck 
 of their lives. There is no royal road to success. 
 The path lies through troubles and discouragements. 
 It lies through fields of earnest, patient labor. It 
 calls on the young man to put forth energy and de- 
 termination. It bids him build well his foundation, 
 but it promises in reward of this a crowning triumph. 
 
 There never was a time in the world's history 
 when high success in any profession or calling de- 
 manded harder or more earnest labor than now. It is 
 impossible to succeed in a hurry. Men can no longer 
 go at a single leap into eminent positions. As those 
 articles are most highly prized to attain which requires 
 the greatest amount of labor, so the road that leads to 
 success is long and rugged. What matter if a round 
 does break or a foot slip ; such things must be 
 
114 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 expected, and being expected, they must be overcome. 
 Rome was not built in a day ; but proofs of her 
 magnificent temples are still to be seen. We each 
 prepare a temple to last through all eternity. A 
 structure to last so long, can it take but a day to 
 build it? The days of a life-time are necessary to 
 build the monument mightier than Rome and more 
 enduring than adamant. It is hard, earnest work, 
 step by step, that secures success ; and while energy 
 and perseverance are securing the prize for steady 
 workers, others, sitting down by the wayside, are 
 wondering why they, too, can not be successful. They 
 surely forget that the true key is labor, and that 
 nothing but a strong, resolute will can turn it. 
 
 The secret of one's success or failure is usually 
 contained in answer to the question, ''How earnest is 
 he?". Success is the child of confidence and persever- 
 ance. The talent of success is simply doing what 
 you can do well, and doing well whatever you do, 
 without a thought of fame. Success is the best test 
 of capacity, and materially confirms us in a favorable 
 opinion of ourselves. Success in life is the proper 
 and harmonious development of those faculties which 
 God has given us. Whatever you try to do in life, 
 try with all your heart to do it well ; whatever you 
 devote yourself to, devote yourself to it completely. 
 Never believe it possible that any natural ability can 
 claim immunity from companionship of the steady, 
 plain, hard-working qualities, and hope to gain its 
 end. There can be no such fulfillment on this earth. 
 .Some happy talent and some fortunate opportunity 
 
SUCCESS OR FAILURE. 115 
 
 may form the sides of the ladder on which some men 
 mount ; but the rounds of the ladder must be made 
 of material to stand wear and tear, and there is no 
 substitute for thorough-going, ardent, sincere ear- 
 nestness. Never put your hand on any thing into 
 which you can not throw your whole self; never 
 affect depreciation of your own work, whatever it is. 
 
 Although success is the guerdon for which all 
 men toil, they have, nevertheless, often to labor on 
 perseveringly without any glimmer of success in sight. 
 They have to live, meanwhile, upon their courage. 
 Sowing their seed, it may be in the dark, in the hope 
 that it will yet take root and spring up in achieved 
 result. The best of causes have had to fight their 
 way to triumph through a long succession of failures, 
 and many of the assailants have died in the breach 
 before the fortune has been won. The heroism they 
 have displayed is to be measured, not so much by 
 their immediate successes, as by the opposition they 
 have encountered and the courage with which they 
 have maintained the struggle. 
 
 Among the habits required for the efficient pros- 
 ecution of business of any kind, and consequent suc- 
 cess, the most important are those of application, 
 observation, method, accuracy, punctuality, and dis- 
 patch. Some persons sneer at these virtues as little 
 things, trifles unworthy of their notice. It must be 
 remembered that human life is made up of trifles. As 
 the pence make the pound and the minutes the hour, 
 so it is the repetition of little things, severally insig- 
 nificant, that make up human character. In the 
 
116 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 majority of cases where men have failed of success, it 
 has been owing to the neglect of little things deemed 
 too microscopic to need attention. It is the result of 
 practical, every-day experience, that steady attention 
 to matter of detail is the mother of good fortune. 
 Accuracy is also of much importance, and an invaria- 
 ble mark of good training in a man — accuracy in 
 observation, accuracy in speech, accuracy in the trans- 
 action of affairs. What is done in business must be 
 done well if you would win the success desired. 
 
 Give a man power, and a field in which to use it, 
 and he must accomplish something. He may not do 
 and become all that he desires and dreams of, but his 
 life can not well be a failure. God has given to all 
 of us ability and opportunity enough to be moder- 
 ately successful. If we utterly fail, in the majority of 
 cases, it is our own fault. We have either neglected 
 to improve the talents with which our Creator has 
 endowed us, or we fail to enter the door that has 
 opened for us. Such is the constitution of human so- 
 ciety, that the wise person gradually learns not to 
 expect too much from life ; while he strives for suc- 
 cess by worthy methods, he will be prepared for fail- 
 ure. He will keep his mind open to enjoyment, but 
 submit patiently to suffering. Wailings and com- 
 plainings in life are never of any use; only cheerful 
 and continuous working in right paths are of real 
 avail. In spite of our best efforts failures are in store 
 for many of us. It remains, then, for you to do the 
 best you can under all circumstances, remembering 
 that the race is not always to the swift nor the battle 
 
SUCCESS OR FAILURE. 117 
 
 to the strong. It is by the right application of swift- 
 ness and strength that you are to make your way. 
 It is not sufficient to do the right thing, it must be 
 done in the right way, at the right time, if you would 
 achieve success. 
 
 Young man, have you ever considered long and 
 earnestly what you were best capable of doing in the 
 world ? If not put it off no longer. You expect to do 
 something, you wish to achieve success. Have you 
 ever thought of what success consisted ? It does not 
 consist in amassing a fortune ; some of the most un- 
 successful men have done that. Remember, too, that 
 success and fame are not synonymous terms. You 
 can not all be famous as lawyers, statesmen, or di- 
 vines. You may or may not accumulate a fortune. 
 But is it not true that wealth, position, and fame are 
 but the accidents of success, that success may or may 
 not be accompanied by them, that it is something 
 above and beyond them ? In this sense of the word 
 you only are to blame if you fall. It is in your power 
 to live a life of integrity and honor. You can so 
 live that all will honor and respect you. You can 
 speak words of cheer to the downhearted, a kindly 
 word of caution to the erring one. You can help 
 remove some obstacle from the paths of the weak. 
 You can incite in the minds of those around you a 
 desire to live a pure, straightforward life. You can 
 bid those who are almost overwhelmed by the billows 
 and waves of sorrow, to look up and see the sun shin- 
 ing through the rifts in the dark clouds passing o'er 
 them. All this can you do, and a grand success will be 
 
118 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 your reward. Away, then, with your lethargy. You 
 are a man ; arise in your strength and your manhood. 
 Resolve to be in this, its true sense, a successful man. 
 And then if wealth or fame wait on you, and men de- 
 light to do you honor, these will be but added laurels 
 to your brow, but the gilded frame encasing success. 
 
 JABOR, either of the head or the hand, is the lot 
 of humanity. There are no exceptions to this 
 general rule. The rich who have toiled early 
 and late for a competence find their present ease 
 more unendurable than their past exertions, and the 
 round of pleasures to which, in other days, they 
 looked for a reward of their toil in actual realization, 
 resolve themselves into drudgeries, often worse than 
 those from which they vainly fancied they had es- 
 caped. The king on his throne is beset with cares, 
 and the labor he performs is ofttimes far heavier 
 than any borne by the poorest peasant in his do- 
 minions. The high and low alike acknowledge the 
 universal sway of labor. That which is thus the 
 common lot of mankind and reigns with such uni- 
 versal sway can not be otherwise than honorable in 
 the highest degree. 
 
 Labor may be a burden and a chastisement, but 
 it is also an honor and a glory. Without it nothing 
 can be accomplished. All that to man is great and 
 
DIGNITY OF LABOR. 119 
 
 precious is acquired only through labor. With- 
 out it civilization would relapse into barbarism. It 
 is the forerunner and indispensable requisite to all 
 the sweet influence of refinement. It is the herald 
 of happiness, and makes the desert to blossom as 
 a garden of roses. It whitens the sea with sails, 
 and stretches bands of iron across the continent. It 
 is labor that drives the plow, scatters the seed, and 
 causes the fields to wave in golden harvests for the 
 good of man. It gathers the grain and sends it to 
 different regions of the earth to feed other millions 
 toiling in less favored channels there. Labor gathers 
 the gossamer web of the caterpillar, the cotton from 
 the field, and the fleece from the flock, and weaves 
 them into raiment soft, warm, and beautiful. The 
 purple robe of royalty, the plain man's sober suit, 
 the fantastic dress of the painted savage, and the 
 furry coverings of arctic lands are alike the results 
 of its handiwork, and proofs of its universal sway 
 and honor. Labor molds the brick, splits the slate, 
 and quarries the stone. It shapes the column and 
 rears not only the humble cottage but the gorgeous 
 palace, the tapering spire and stately dome. 
 
 It is by labor that mankind have risen from a state 
 of barbarism to the light of the present. It is only 
 by labor that progression can continue. Labor, pos- 
 sessing such inherent dignity and being the grand 
 measure of progress, it is most fitting that man 
 should not taste life's greatest happiness, or wield 
 great influence for good, or reach the summit of his 
 ambitious resolves, save only as the result of long 
 
120 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 and patient labor. Life is a short day; but it is a 
 working day, and not a holiday. Man was made for 
 action, and life is a mere scene for the exercise of 
 the mind and engagement of the hand — a scene 
 where the most important occupations are, in one 
 sense, but species of amusement, and where so long 
 as we take pleasure in the pursuit of an object it 
 matters but little that we secure it not, or that it 
 fades when acquired. 
 
 Life to some is drudgery ; to some, pain ; to some, 
 art ; to others, pleasure ; but to all, work. Let none 
 feel a sense of sore disappointment that life to them 
 becomes routine. It is a necessary consequence of 
 our natures that our work and our amusements, our 
 business and our pleasures, should tend to become 
 routine. The same wants, the same demands, and 
 similar duties meet us on the threshold of every day. 
 We look forward to some great occasion on which 
 to display ourselves, some grand event in which to 
 give proof of a heroic spirit, and complain of the 
 petty routine of daily life. On the contrary, it is this 
 succession of little duties — little works apparently of 
 no account — which constitute the grand work of life ; 
 and we display true nobility when we cheerfully take 
 these up and go forward, content to 
 
 " Labor and to wait." 
 
 Alas for the man or woman who has not learned 
 to work ! They are but poor creatures. They know 
 not themselves. They depend on others for support. 
 Let them not fancy they have a monopoly of enjoy- 
 
DIGNITY OF LABOR. 121 
 
 ment. They have missed the sweetest pleasure of 
 life, even the pleasure of self-reliant feeling, born of 
 vanquished difficulties. They know not the thrill 
 of pleasure experienced by him who carries difficult 
 projects to a successful termination. Each rest owes 
 its deliciousness to toil, and no toil is so burdensome 
 as the rest of him who has nothing to task and 
 quicken his powers. They do not realize, in their 
 blind pride, what labor has done for them. It was 
 labor that rocked them in their cradle and nourished 
 their pampered life. Without it the very garments 
 on their back would be unspun. He is indebted to 
 toil for the meanest thing that ministers to his wants, 
 save only the air of heaven, and even that, in God's 
 wise providence, is breathed with labor. 
 
 Labor explores the rich veins of deeply buried 
 rocks, extracting the gold and silver, the copper and 
 tin. Labor smelts the iron, and molds it into a 
 thousand shapes for use and ornaments, from the 
 massive pillar to the tiniest needle, from the ponder- 
 ous anchor to the wire gauze, from the mighty fly- 
 wheel of the engine to the polished purse-ring or 
 glittering bead. Labor hews down the gnarled oak, 
 shapes the timbers, builds the ship, and guides it 
 over the deep, bringing to our shores the produce 
 of every clime. 
 
 But mere physical, manual labor is not the sole 
 end of life. It must be joined with higher means of 
 improvement, or it degrades instead of exalts. The 
 poorest laborer has intellect, heart, imagination, 
 tastes, as well as bones and muscles, and he is 
 
122 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 grievously wronged when compelled to exclusive 
 drudgery for bodily subsistence. It is the condition 
 of all outward comforts and improvements, whilst, at 
 the same time, it conspires with higher means and 
 influences in ministering to the vigor and growth of 
 the mind. Not only has labor inherent dignity, but 
 it is almost a necessity for mind as well as body. 
 Man is an intelligence, sustained and preserved by 
 bodily organs, and their active exercise is necessary 
 to the enjoyment of health. It is not work, but over- 
 work, that is hurtful ; it is not hard work that is in- 
 jurious so much as monotonous, fagging, hopeless 
 work. All hopeful work is healthful ; and to be use- 
 fully and properly employed is one of the great 
 secrets of happiness. 
 
 Most interesting is the contemplation of the vic- 
 tories achieved by the hand of labor — victories far 
 grander than any achieved by physical force on the 
 field of battle ; for its conquests are wrested from 
 nature. The very elements are brought under sub- 
 jection, and made to contribute to the good of man. 
 It displays its triumph in a thousand cities ; it glories 
 in shapes of beauty ; it speaks in words of power ; 
 it makes the sinewy arm strong with liberty, the poor 
 man's heart rich with content, crowns the swarthy 
 and sweaty brow with honor, dignity, and peace. It 
 is one of the best regulators of practical character. 
 It evokes and disciplines obedience, self-control, at- 
 tention, application, and perseverance, giving a man 
 deftness and skill in his physical calling, and aptitude 
 and dexterity in the affairs of ordinary life. Work is 
 
DIGNITY OF LABOR. 123 
 
 the law of our being, the living principle that carries 
 men and nations onward. Manual labor is a school 
 in which men are placed to get energy of purpose 
 and character — a vastly more important endowment 
 than the learning of other schools. 
 
 The laborer is placed, indeed, under hard mas- 
 ters — the power of physical elements, physical suffer- 
 ings, and want. But these stern teachers do a work 
 which no compassionate, intelligent friend could do 
 for us, and true wisdom will bless Providence for this 
 sharp necessity. Labor is not merely the grand in- 
 strument by which the earth is overspread with fruit- 
 fulness and beauty, the ocean subdued, and matter 
 wrought into innumerable forms for comfort and 
 ornament ; it has a far higher function, which is to 
 give force to the will, efficiency, courage, the capacity 
 of endurance and of devotion to far-reaching plans. 
 
 We must ever remember that it is the intention 
 only that disgraces ; that all honest work is honor- 
 able ; and if your occupation be not so high-sounding 
 as you would like, still it is better to work faithfully 
 at this until opportunity opens the door to something 
 higher. Because you do not find just what suits you, 
 to refuse to labor at all, to play the drone, is to act 
 unworthy of yourself and your destiny. Neither is 
 it beneath you to make yourself useful, regardless of 
 what your position and wealth may be. A gentle- 
 man by birth and education, however richly he may 
 be endowed with worldly position, can not but feel 
 that he is in duty bound to contribute his quota of 
 endeavor towards the general well-being in which he 
 
124 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 shares. He can not be satisfied with being fed, clad, 
 and maintained by the labors of others, without mak- 
 ing some suitable return to the society that upholds 
 him. It matters not what a person's natural gifts 
 may be, he can not expect to attain in any profession 
 to a high degree of success without going through 
 with a vast deal of work, which, taken by itself, 
 would rightly be called drudgery. That quality in 
 man which, for want of a better name, we call genius, 
 does not consist in an ability to get along without 
 work, but, on the contrary, is generally the faculty 
 of doing an immense amount of work. Young men 
 sometimes think that it is not respectable to be at 
 work, and imagine that there is some character of 
 disgrace or degradation belonging to toil. No greater 
 mistake could be made. Instead of being disgraceful 
 to engage in work, it is especially honorable. The 
 most illustrious names in history were hard workers. 
 No one whom posterity delights to honor ever 
 dreamed or idled his way to fame. To be idle and 
 useless is neither an honor nor a privilege. Though 
 persons of small natures may be content merely to 
 consume, men of average endowments, of manly ex- 
 pectations, and of honest purpose will feel such a 
 condition to be incompatible with real honor and true 
 dignity. 
 
 The noblest man on earth is he who puts his 
 hands cheerfully and proudly to honest labor, and 
 goes forth to conquer honor and worth. Labor is 
 mighty and beautiful. The world has long since 
 learned that man can not be truly man without ^*~ 
 
PEKSEVERANCE. 125 
 
 ployment. Would that young men might judge of 
 the dignity of labor by its usefulness rather than by 
 the gloss it wears ! We do not see a man's nobility 
 in dress and toilet adornments, but in the sinewy 
 arm, roughened, it may be, by hardy, honest toil, 
 under whose farmer's or mechanic's vest a kingly 
 heart may beat. Exalt thine adopted calling or pro- 
 fession. Look on labor as honorable, and dignify the 
 task before thee, whether it be in the study, office, 
 counting-room, workshop, or furrowed field. There 
 is equality in all, and the resolute will and pure heart 
 may ennoble either. 
 
 cAo 
 
 ^S?^S&N<3^. 
 
 jT is only by reflection that we derive a just ap- 
 preciation of the value of perseverance. When 
 we see how much can be accomplished in any 
 given direction by the man or woman of but aver- 
 age ability who resolutely perseveres in the course of 
 action adopted as the ruling purpose of their lives, 
 we then arrive at a just estimate of the value of per- 
 verance as a factor in success. The old fable of the 
 hare and the tortoise only exemplifies a truth which 
 we are all ready to admit when we once stop to 
 admire those stupendous works of nature and art, 
 which proclaim in no uncertain tones the triumph of 
 perseverance. All the performances of human art, 
 at which we look with praise or wonder, are instances 
 
126 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 of the resistless force of perseverance. It is by this 
 that the quarry becomes a pyramid ; it is by this the 
 Coliseum of Rome was built ; and this it was that 
 inclosed in adamant the Chinese empire. 
 
 One man's individual exertion seems to go for 
 nothing. If a person were to compare the result of 
 one man's work with the general design and last 
 result, he would be overwhelmed by the sense of 
 their disproportion. Yet these petty operations, in- 
 cessantly continued, in time surmount the greatest 
 difficulties. Mountains are elevated and oceans 
 bounded by the slender force of human beings. 
 How many men, who have won well-nigh imperish- 
 able renown in the world of literature, science, or 
 art, owe all their greatness to persevering efforts? 
 How many of those whom the world calls geniuses 
 can exclaim with Newton that they owe all their 
 greatness to persevering efforts, and whatever they 
 may have been able to accomplish more than ordi- 
 nary has been solely by virtue of perseverance ? 
 They were the sons of unremitting industry and toil. 
 They were once as weak and helpless as any of us, 
 once as destitute of wisdom and power as an infant. 
 Once the very alphabet of that language which they 
 have wielded with such magic effect was unknown to 
 them. They toiled long to learn it, to get its sounds, 
 understand its deeper fancies, and longer still to 
 obtain the secret of its highest charm and mightiest 
 power, and yet even longer for those living, glorious 
 thoughts which they bade it bear to an astonished 
 and admiring world. 
 
PERSEVERANCE. 127 
 
 Their characters, which are now given to the 
 world and will be to millions yet unborn as patterns 
 of greatness and goodness, were made by that untir- 
 ing perseverance which marked their* whole lives. 
 From childhood to age they knew no such word as 
 fail. Defeat only gave them power ; difficulty only 
 taught them the necessity of redoubled exertions; 
 dangers gave them courage, and the sight of great 
 labors inspired in them corresponding exertions. 
 Their success has been wrought out by persevering 
 industry. It has been said by shrewd observers that 
 successful men owe more to their perseverance than 
 to their natural powers, their friends, or the favorable 
 circumstances around them. Genius will falter by 
 the side of labor, great powers will give place to great 
 industry. Talents are desirable, but perseverance is 
 more so. It will make mental powers, or at least 
 strengthen those already made. This should teach a 
 great lesson of patience to those who are so nearly 
 ready to sink in despair, and have grown weary in 
 their strivings for better things. For one who faints 
 not, but resolutely takes up the work of life and per- 
 severingly continues his exertion, it is possible for 
 him to reach almost any height to which his ambition 
 may point. Some of the great works of literature, 
 in which are stored away great masses of information, 
 are the results of persevering efforts, before which 
 many minds would have quailed. 
 
 Gibbon consumed nineteen years in writing his 
 masterpiece. How many would have had the cour- 
 age to persevere that length of time, though certain 
 
128 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 of success at last? Courage, when combined with 
 energy and perseverance, will overcome difficulties 
 apparently insurmountable. Perseverance, working 
 in the right direction and when steadily practiced, 
 even by the most humble, will rarely fail of its reward. 
 It inspires in the minds of all fair-minded people a 
 friendly feeling. Who will not befriend the persever- 
 ing, energetic youth, the fearless man of industry ? 
 Who is not a friend to him who is a friend to himself? 
 He who perseveres in business, amidst hardships and 
 discouragements, will always find ready and generous 
 friends in time of need. He who will persevere in a 
 course of wisdom, rectitude, and benevolence, is sure 
 to gather round him friends who will be true and 
 faithful. 
 
 Go to the men of business, of worth, of influence, 
 and ask them who shall have their confidence and 
 support. They will tell you "the men who falter not 
 by the wayside, who toil on in their calling against 
 every barrier, whose eyes are 'upward,' and whose 
 motto is 'excelsior.' ' These are the men to whom 
 they give their confidence. But they shun the lazy, 
 the indolent, the fearful and faltering. They would 
 as soon trust the wind as such men. If you would 
 win friends, be steady and true to yourself. Be the 
 unfailing friend of your own purposes, stand by your 
 own character, and others will come to your aid. 
 
 Almost every portion of the earth teems with 
 works which show what man has been able to effect 
 in the physical world by means of perseverance. 
 Calculate, if you can, the efforts required to build 
 
PERSEVERANCE. 129 
 
 the pyramids of Egypt. Can you conceive of a more 
 enduring monument to the triumph of perseverance 
 than that? Look at nature. She has a thousand 
 voices teaching lessons of perseverance. The lofty 
 mountains are wearing down by slow degrees. The 
 ocean is gradually, but surely, filling up, by deposits 
 from its thousand rivers, and by the labors of a little 
 insect so small as to be almost invisible to the naked 
 eye. Every shower that sweeps over the surface of 
 the country tends to bring the hills and the mount- 
 ains to the level of the plains. Nature has but one 
 lesson on this subject, and that is, " Persevere." 
 
 More depends upon active perseverance than 
 upon genius. Says a common-sense author upon 
 this subject : " Genius unexerted is no more genius 
 than a bushel of acorns is a forest of oaks." There 
 may be epics in men's brains, just as there are oaks 
 in acorns, but the tree and the book must come out 
 before we can measure them. Firmness of purpose 
 is one of the most necessary sinews of character, and 
 one of the best instruments of success. Without it, 
 genius wastes its efforts in a maze of inconsistencies. 
 It gives power to weakness, and opens to poverty the 
 world's mark. It spreads fertility over the barren 
 landscape, and bids the choicest fruits and flowers 
 spring up and flourish in the desert abode. There 
 is, perhaps, nothing more conducive to success in 
 any important and difficult undertaking than a firm, 
 steady, unremitting spirit. In seasons of distress 
 and difficulty, to abandon ourselves to dejection is 
 evidence of a weak mind. Opposing circumstances 
 
130 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 often create strength, both mental and physical. Op- 
 position gives us greater power of resistance. To 
 overcome one barrier gives us greater ability to over- 
 come the next. It is cowardice to grumble about 
 circumstances. Instead of sinking under trouble, it 
 becomes us, in the evil day, with perseverance to 
 maintain our part, to bear up against the storm, to 
 have recourse to those advantages, which, in the 
 worst of times, are always left to integrity and 
 virtue, and never to give up the hope that better 
 days may come. 
 
 It is wonderful to see what miracles a resolute 
 and unyielding will can achieve. Before its irresisti- 
 ble energy the most formidable obstacles become as 
 cobweb barriers in the path. Difficulties, the terrors 
 of which cause the irresolute to sink back with dis- 
 may, provoke from the man of lofty determination 
 only a smile. The whole history of our race, all 
 nature, indeed, teems with examples to show what 
 wonders may be accomplished by resolute persever- 
 ance and patient toil. How many there are who, 
 thinking of the immense amount of work lying be- 
 tween them and the object of their desires, are almost 
 ready to give up in despair ! But do they not, when 
 they view the work thus in mass, forget that there is 
 time enough, if only rightly improved, to suffice for 
 each effort ? 
 
 One step after another, perseveringly continued, 
 will enable you to arrive at your journey's end, how- 
 ever long it may be. It is only when you come to 
 sreckon up the aggregate number of steps that you 
 
PERSEVERANCE. 131 
 
 are ready to sink under a feeling of despair. But 
 you are not required to take them all at once ; there 
 is an allotted time for each individual step. Thus, 
 in viewing any work that you may have marked out 
 in life, only remember that you are not obliged to do 
 the work all at once ; that the regular daily portions 
 performed quietly and systematically, day after day, 
 will enable you to achieve almost any desired result. 
 When we reflect on the wonderful results that per- 
 severance has accomplished, we are led to believe 
 that the man who wills, resolves, and perseveres can 
 do almost any thing. 
 
 Every one, then, regardless of his condition in 
 life, should set his aim high, and resolve to remit no 
 labor necessary for its realization, but cheerfully take 
 up the trials and burdens that life has in store for 
 him, and carry them forward, be the discouragements 
 what they may, to a glorious consummation. Only 
 learn to carry a thing through in all of its details, 
 and you have measured the secret of success. Only 
 learn to persevere in carrying out any plan of work 
 which an enlightened judgment decides is the best, 
 and you will force life to yield you its grandest tri- 
 umphs. There is almost no limit to what you can 
 achieve if you thus govern your actions, and make 
 all your exertions contribute to the fulfilling of some 
 great purpose of life, which you took up with a brave 
 heart, and with a determination to persevere therein 
 until success crowns your efforts. 
 
132 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 StftMS&fc&I^. 
 
 cAo 
 
 liLOSELY allied with the qualities of self-reliance 
 
 S§ and energy is that characteristic quality which so 
 flf much conduces to success in life, and is gener- 
 ally expressed by the word " enterprise." It is 
 distinct from energy, inasmuch as it is constantly 
 active in discovering new fields for energy to exert 
 itself in. We are familiar with examples of men 
 who have won fortunes or gained renown, not be- 
 cause they pursued better or wiser courses, but 
 because of some originality in their aims and meth- 
 ods, by which they were enabled to command the 
 attention of the busy world long enough to wrest 
 from it the special object of their choice. 
 
 True enterprise is constantly on the alert to dis- 
 cover some new want of society, some fertile source 
 of profit or honor, some unexplored field of business, 
 and is ready to supply the one or to take advantage 
 of the other. It is nearly an indispensable element 
 in these days of fierce competition. Every avenue 
 of business is crowded, and as soon as it is known 
 that one party has made a success by one method 
 there are scores of eager aspirants ready to try the 
 successful plan, so that straightway it, too, ceases to 
 be unique, and, in becoming common, loses the power 
 it formerly possessed of compelling success. Hence 
 the late-comers in the field are doomed to failure, 
 while they may at the same time be the better fitted 
 for the peculiar work in hand. What they should 
 
ENTERPRISE. 133 
 
 do is to aim at success by new plans and methods. 
 Every one knows the enthusiastic glow that animates 
 the whole being of him who feels the ardor of an 
 explorer, who surmounts difficulties by new and, be- 
 fore, unthought-of expedients, who plans and projects 
 enterprises that had previously escaped the active 
 minds of his fellow men. 
 
 It is by virtue of this very enthusiasm that the 
 man of enterprise, who is so ready to adopt new 
 measures, plans, and projects, is enabled to carry 
 into his business or profession an energy and inspira- 
 tion which is totally lacking on the part of those who 
 are followers. Hence the latter ofttimes fail of suc- 
 cess which their talents might almost be said to have 
 promised them. Therefore, those who enter the lists 
 to win life's battles must expect, if they would reach 
 their goal, to wage the fight not only by the old 
 methods but by the new. To use only those tactics 
 which are sanctioned by usage is to invite defeat. 
 Throw open the windows of your mind to new ideas, 
 and keep at least abreast of the times, and, if pos- 
 sible, ahead of them. Nothing is more fatal to 
 self-advancement than a stupid conservatism or a 
 servile imitation. The days when a man could get 
 rich by plodding on without enterprise and without 
 taxing his brains have gone by. Mere industry and 
 economy are not enough ; there must be intelligence 
 and original thought. 
 
 Whatever your calling, inventiveness, adaptability, 
 promptness of decision, must direct and utilize your 
 force, and if you do not find markets you must make 
 
134 GOLDEX GEMS OE LIFE. 
 
 them. In business you need not know many books, 
 but you must know your trade and men. You may 
 be slow at logic, but you must dart at chances. You 
 may stick to your groove in politics, but in your 
 business you must switch into new tracks, and shape 
 yourself to every exigency. We emphasize this 
 matter because in no country is the red-tapist so 
 out of place as here. Every calling is filled with 
 bold, keen, subtle-witted men, fertile in expedients 
 and devices, who are perpetually inventing new ways 
 of buying cheaply, underselling, or attracting custom ; 
 and the man who sticks doggedly to the old-fashioned 
 methods — who runs in a perpetual rut — will find 
 himself outstripped in the race of life, if he is -not 
 stranded on the sands of popular indifference. Keep, 
 then, your eyes open and your wits about you, and 
 you may distance all competitors ; but, if you ignore 
 all new methods, you will find yourself like a lugger 
 contending with an ocean steamer. 
 
 It is enterprise that oils the wheels of energy 
 and industry. Industry gathers together, with a 
 frugal hand, the means whereby we are enabled to 
 develop our plans and purposes. Energy gives us 
 force whereby we gather the courage to persevere 
 in the lines decided on, bids us put on a bold mien 
 and go forth to do valiant battle against opposing 
 circumstances. But it is enterprise that suggests 
 ways and means to overcome difficulties that threaten 
 to overwhelm us. It is enterprise that bids us ex- 
 plore entirely new fields, discovering expedients that 
 enable us to change what, by the force of circum- 
 
ENTERPRISE. 135 
 
 stances, was fast becoming a failure into a glorious 
 victory, bringing to us wealth, position, and fame. It 
 is to enterprise that we are indebted for those rich dis- 
 coveries in scientific fields by which we decipher the rec- 
 ords of past ages, and unravel the secrets which nature 
 surrounded with mystery, compelling them to serve us. 
 
 It was enterprise that harnessed steam, teaching 
 it to do our bidding, and brought the lightning down 
 from the heavens to carry our thoughts to the utter- 
 most parts of the earth. It is the spirit of enter- 
 prise driving curious minds to work in new directions 
 that has given us all those useful and curious in- 
 ventions, which have done so much to make this 
 nineteenth-century civilization to shine with so lus- 
 trous a light. In short, it is enterprise that lifts the 
 man of but mediocre abilities and attainments into 
 the foremost ranks of the successful ones. 
 
 Enterprise is an inheritance and not an acquisi- 
 tion. But it can at the same time be improved by 
 cultivation, the same as bodily strength or any men- 
 tal faculty. He who would excel as a swimmer must 
 be often in the water, and the gymnast does not 
 spare himself long and fatiguing exertions. So of 
 an enterprising spirit. Some men seem born with an 
 overflow of this, while others possess it in a slight 
 degree only. But if any would be known as enter- 
 prising men, they must not hesitate to show by their 
 every-day actions that they rely upon themselves in 
 cases of emergency, and the greater the necessity 
 the better means of surmounting it are constantly 
 discovered. They must not hesitate to try plans 
 
136 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 because they are new ; but if sober judgment can dis- 
 cover no objection to it, they must seize upon the 
 very novelty of the plan as an inducement, and be 
 only the more eager to put it to the test. There is 
 no life so routine but that it constantly affords scope 
 for the exercise of enterprising energy. The very 
 fact that you are finding it routine and commonplace 
 should at once set you to work to devise some new 
 way to change this. 
 
 Do not stand sighing, wishing, and waiting, but go 
 to work with an energy and perseverance that will 
 set every obstacle in the way of your success flying 
 like leaves before a whirlwind. A weak and irreso- 
 lute way of doing business will shipwreck your plans 
 as readily as effects follow causes. You may have 
 ambition enough to wish yourself on the topmost 
 round of the ladder of success ; but if you have not 
 the requisite energy to commence and enterprise 
 enough to push ahead even when you know you are 
 off the beaten track, you will always remain at the 
 bottom, or at least on the lower rounds. Providence 
 has hidden a charm in difficult undertakings which is 
 appreciated only by those who dare to grapple with 
 them. But this can only be true when you, by your 
 own exertions and the strength of your own self- 
 reliance and enterprise, have achieved the results. 
 Nothing can be more distasteful than to see men of 
 apparently good abilities waiting for some one to 
 come and help them over difficulties. 
 
 Be your own helper. If a rock rises up before 
 you, roll it along or climb over it. If you want 
 
ENTERPRISE. 137 
 
 money, earn it. If you want confidence, prove your- 
 self worthy of it. Do not be content with doing 
 what has been done ; surpass it. Deserve suc- 
 cess and it will come. The sun does not rise like a 
 rocket or go down like a bullet fired from a gun ; 
 slowly and surely it makes it rounds, and never tires. 
 It is as easy to be a lead horse as a wheel horse. 
 If the job be long, the pay will be greater ; if the 
 task be hard, the more competent you must be to do 
 it. We must apportion our strength and exertions 
 to the requisite tasks and duties. He who weakly 
 shrinks from the struggle, who will offer no resist- 
 ance, who will endure no labor nor fatigue, can 
 neither fulfill his own vocation, nor contribute aught 
 to the general welfare of mankind. 
 
 The spirit of the times demands that all who 
 would rise in life shrink not back from labor, but it 
 also demands that they exert themselves understand- 
 ing^ ; that they spare no effort to master all the 
 intricacies of the business or vocation in which they 
 are engaged; that they be alert to discover new 
 ways by which they may reach the desired goal easier 
 than the old ; that they bear in mind that sticking to 
 the old ruts is only the right policy so long as no 
 better way presents itself, and when that way is 
 discovered, be not at all slow to improve it. If you 
 do not, others more enterprising will rush forward to 
 reap the profits it promises, and you will be left 
 behind in the race. No matter what your position in 
 life may be or the conditions which hem you in, there 
 will be a "tide" in your affairs, "which, taken at its 
 
138 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 flood, leads on to fortune." But you must be ready 
 to accept the chance. While you are hesitating and 
 deliberating the occasion goes by, in most cases 
 never to return again. Therefore, be prompt to seize 
 it as it flies. Cultivate as far as possible the spirit 
 of enterprise, for on that in a great degree depends 
 your success or failure. 
 
 TO£<¥£. 
 
 |NERGY is force of character, inward power. It 
 - imports such a concentration of the will upon 
 4h the realization of an idea as to impel it onward 
 over the next gigantic barrier, or to crush every 
 opposing force that stands in the way of its triumph. 
 Energy knows of nothing but success. It will not 
 hearken to the voice of discouragement ; it never 
 yields its purpose. Though it may perish beneath 
 an avalanche of difficulties, yet it dies contending for 
 its ideal. 
 
 There is, perhaps, no mistake of a young man 
 more common than that of supposing that, in the 
 pursuits of life, extraordinary talents are necessary 
 to one who would achieve more than ordinary suc- 
 cess. There is no greater genius than the genius of 
 energy and industry, It wins the prizes of life, which 
 appeared destined to fall to those brilliantly consti- 
 tuted minds, who, to an artificial observer, seemed 
 to be the favored sons of fortune. But they lacked 
 
ENERGY. 139 
 
 energy, and in that want lacked all. Energy of tem- 
 perament, with a moderate degree of wisdom, will 
 carry a man farther than any amount of intellect with- 
 out it. It gives him force, momentum. It is the act- 
 ive power of character, and, if combined with sagacity 
 and self-possession, will enable a man to employ his 
 power to the best advantage in all the affairs of life. 
 Hence it is that men of mediocre power, but impelled 
 by energy of purpose, have often been able to accom- 
 plish such extraordinary results. 
 
 The men who have most powerfully influenced the 
 world have not been so much men of genius as men 
 of strong convictions and enduring capacity for work, 
 impelled by irresistible energy and invincible deter- 
 mination. Energy of will, self-originating force, is the 
 soul of every great character. Where it is, there is 
 life ; where it is not, there is faintness, helplessness, 
 and despondency. There is a proverb which says 
 that " the strong man and the waterfall channel their 
 own path." The energetic leader of noble spirit not 
 only wins a way for himself, but carries others with 
 him. His very act has a personal signification, indi- 
 cating vigor, independence, and self-reliance, and 
 unconsciously commands respect, admiration, and 
 homage. Such intrepidity is the attribute of all great 
 leaders of men. 
 
 There is a difference between resolution and en- 
 ergy. Resolution is the purpose, energy is the qual- 
 ity, and it is possible to possess much resolution with 
 comparatively very little energy. Energy implies a 
 fixed, settled, and unswerving purpose ; but resolution 
 
140 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 may vary its inclination a thousand ways and embrace 
 a thousand objects, keeping up, perhaps, an air of 
 steadiness and determination, while, in reality, noth- 
 ing may be accomplished. There is observable the 
 same difference between resolution and energy as 
 there is between kindness and goodness — kindness 
 being displayed by occasional acts of good-will, whilst 
 goodness exists always, by a principle of love. Do 
 not make the mistake of confounding energy with 
 rashness. Energy is a Bucephalus, guided by the 
 hand of an Alexander. Rashness is a Mazeppa's 
 fiery steed, unbridled and unrestrained, bearing its 
 rider over hill and dale to probable destruction. The 
 former is power guided by wisdom ; the latter is 
 power goaded to action by blind impulse. 
 
 Energy, to reach its highest development, must 
 be controlled by wisdom. Many men now pining 
 under discouragement have expended energy suffi- 
 cient for the highest success. But they have failed 
 of their reward because they have not sought counsel 
 at the lips of wisdom. Rash enterprises impetuously 
 begun hurry them on to ruin. True energy is ever 
 the same ; but the energy of many men is impulsive. 
 It is to-day a destroying, roaring torrent ; yesterday 
 it was a stagnant pool. An accidental circumstance 
 will call out every power of their soul, and for a 
 season they will excel themselves and startle their 
 friends. But they speedily expend their force, and 
 lapse into stupid somnolency, till aroused by some 
 bugle-blast of excitement. Such minds accomplish 
 but little. They lose more in their slumbers th*** 
 
.ENERGY. 141 
 
 they gain in their fitful hours of action. The calm, 
 steady energy of the snail, slow as are its move- 
 ments, is better calculated to produce results than 
 the spasmodic leaps of the hare. Hence, in the for- 
 mation of character, it is of the utmost importance to 
 cultivate a steady, uniform, unyielding energy. The 
 quiet energy that works to accomplishment is what 
 rules the world. There is. more energy shown in 
 quietly doing your duty through years of patient toil 
 than to rush with great clamor at the obstacles of 
 life, only to relinquish the attempt if success does not 
 immediately crown the effort. The game of life is 
 won less by brilliant strokes than by energetic yet 
 cautious play. 
 
 Energy of character has always a power to make 
 energy in others. The zealous, energetic man un- 
 consciously carries others along with him. His ex- 
 ample is contagious, and compels imitation. He 
 exercises a sort of electric power, which sends a thrill 
 through every fiber, flows into the nature of those 
 about him, and makes them throw out sparks of 
 power. But such men are but few ; and for one man 
 that appears on the stage of human affairs that can 
 rule events there are thousands who follow. The 
 earnest men are so few in the world that their very 
 earnestness becomes at once the badge of their no- 
 bility ; and as the men in a crowd instinctively make 
 room for one who seems to force his way through it, 
 so mankind every-where open their ranks to one who 
 rushes valiantly toward some object lying beyond 
 them. 
 
142 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 Man is but a feeble being, but he belittles his 
 high estate unless he puts forth his exertion, and 
 forms a commendable and heroic resolution not to 
 permit life to pass away in trifles, but to accomplish 
 something in spite of obstacles. At difficulties be 
 not dismayed. We may magnify them by weakness 
 and despondency, when an heroic spirit would have 
 put them to flight. There are cobble-stones in every 
 road and pebbles in every path. All have cares, dis- 
 appointments, and stumbling-blocks. It were well to 
 remember, though, that sobs and cries, groans and 
 regrets are of no avail, but that high resolves and 
 courageous actions may with safety be relied on to 
 do much to lighten life's load. He who never grap- 
 pled with the emergencies of life knows not what 
 power lives in the soul to repel the rude shocks of 
 time and destiny, nor is he conscious how much he is 
 
 1 ' Blest with a kindly faculty to blunt 
 The edge of adverse circumstances." 
 
 All traditions current among young men that cer- 
 tain great characters have wrought their greatness by 
 an inspiration, as it were, grows out of a sad mistake. 
 There is no inspiration so potent for good as the in- 
 spiration of energy. There are none who wrest 
 such conquests from fame as those earnest, deter- 
 mined minds, who reckon the value of every hour, 
 and rely on their own strong arm to achieve their 
 ambitious resolves. You can not dream yourself 
 into a character ; you must hammer and forge your- 
 self one. But remember, there is always room for 
 
ENERGY. 143 
 
 a man of force, and he makes room for many. It is 
 a Spanish proverb that "he who loseth wealth loseth 
 much; he who loseth a friend loseth more; but he 
 who loseth energy loseth all." It is folly for a man 
 or woman to sit down in mid-life discouraged. True, 
 it is a severe test of character calmly to reflect that 
 life has thus far proved a failure, but it does no good 
 to abandon one's self to despair. With energy and 
 God's blessing it is possible they may yet win a 
 glorious victory. God in his wisdom has seen fit to 
 so ordain that life with all shall be a scene of labor. 
 To make the most of it, it is necessary to make the 
 aim high and noble, the energy unflagging. No mat- 
 ter how apparently solid the foundations on which we 
 stand, it often happens that by the remission of labor 
 and energy, poverty and contempt, disaster and de- 
 feat steal a march upon prosperity and honor, and 
 overwhelm us with remorse and shame. 
 
 It is energy that makes the difference in men. It 
 is the genius of persevering energy that carries so 
 many men straight to the goal of success. It is 
 energy that sheds the light of hope on pathways that 
 had been lost save for that, and thus enables so many 
 men and women to persevere therein. It is en- 
 ergy that calls upon all — and calls upon you — to 
 rouse yourself. Would you make a success of life ? 
 Would you acquire fortune or renown? It bids you 
 take heart and hope for the best. It bids you walk 
 in the paths of patience, to do with all your might 
 what you have marked out as necessary to do. It 
 bids you pursue it with resolution and vigor. 
 
144 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 A young man is, in the true sense of the word, the 
 architect of his own fortune. Rely upon your own 
 strength of body and soul. Remember that the man 
 who wills it can go almost anywhere or do almost any 
 thing he determines to do. You must make yourself, 
 or come to nothing. You must win by your own 
 exertions, and not wait for some one to come to your 
 assistance. Take for your star self-reliance, faith, 
 honesty, and industry. Keep at the helm, and, above 
 all, remember that the great art of commanding is to 
 do a fair share of the work yourself. The greater 
 the difficulty the more the glory in surmounting it. 
 Skillful pilots gain their reputation from storms and 
 tempests. The soul of every great achievement is 
 energy ; but enervation and indolence sap its life, and 
 doom the man to obscurity and ill-success. Men of 
 feeble action are accustomed to attribute their misfor- 
 tune to what is termed ill hick. They envy the men 
 who climb the ladder of eminence, and call them lucky 
 men and men of peculiar opportunity. This is a vain 
 and foolish imagination. Energy produces good for- 
 tune and success, while enervation breeds misfortune 
 and ill luck. 
 
 Fortune, success, fame, position are never gained 
 but by determinedly and bravely persevering in any 
 course until the plans are finally accomplished. In 
 short, you must carry a thing through if you want to 
 be any body or any thing, no matter if it does cost 
 you the pleasure of society, the thousand pearly 
 gratifications of life. Stick to the thing and carry it 
 through. Believe you were made for the matter, and 
 
PUNCTUALITY. 145 
 
 that no one else could do it. Put forth your whole 
 energies. Be awake; electrify yourself; go forth to 
 the task. Learn to carry it through, and you will be 
 a hero. You will think better of yourself. Others 
 will think better of you. The world in its very heart 
 admires the stern, determined doer. It sees in him 
 its best sights, its brightest objects, its richest treas- 
 ures. Proceed with energy, then, in whatever you 
 undertake. Consider yourself amply sufficient for 
 the deed, and you will succeed. 
 
 ofe 
 
 fctf]St6Mi;jaiM& 
 
 |||pMONGST the elements which conduce to suc- 
 SS cess in life there is one of rare value, which, 
 y by some strange oversight, is classed as of 
 little account. We refer to punctuality. We 
 regard it as a virtue. To be punctual in all of your 
 appointments is a duty resting upon you no less 
 obligatory than the duty of common honesty. An 
 appointment is a contract, and if you do not keep 
 it you are dishonestly using other people's time, and, 
 consequently, their money. " Punctuality," says Louis 
 XIV, "is the politeness of kings." He need not 
 have confined his remarks to blood royal; it is po- 
 liteness in every body ; and know that whenever you 
 fail to meet an engagement promptly, which by exer- 
 tion you might have done, you are guilty of a gross 
 breach of etiquette. 
 
 IO 
 
146 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 It is certainly impolite to do a wrong to others, 
 and when you have made an appointment with an- 
 other person you owe him punctuality, and you have 
 no right to waste his time if you have your own. 
 Success and happiness depend in a far higher de- 
 gree on punctuality than many suppose. It is not 
 sufficient to do the right thing, nor in the right way, 
 but it must be done at the right time as well, if we 
 would reap the rewards of our labor. But when so 
 done its effect in the problem of success is great and 
 efficacious. Lord Nelson attributed all his success in 
 life to his habit of strict punctuality. Many of our 
 most successful business men date their success from 
 the time they commenced to practice this virtue. 
 Thousands have failed in life from carelessness in 
 this respect alone. Nothing inspires confidence in a 
 business man sooner than this quality; nor is there 
 any habit which sooner saps his reputation as a good 
 business man than that of being always behind time. 
 
 Lack of punctuality is not only a serious vice in 
 itself, but it is also the parent of a large progeny of 
 other vices. Hence he who becomes its victim is the 
 more and more involved in toils from which it is 
 almost impossible to escape. He who needlessly 
 breaks his appointments shows that he is as reckless 
 of the waste of other people's time as of his own. 
 His acquaintances readily conclude that the man who 
 is not conscientious about his appointments will be 
 equally careless about his other engagements, and 
 they will refuse to trust him with matters of impor- 
 tance. To the busy man time is money, and he who 
 
PUNCTUALITY. 147 
 
 robs him of it does him as great an injury, as far 
 as loss of property is concerned, as if he had 
 picked his pockets or paid him with a forged or 
 counterfeit bill. 
 
 It is a familiar truth that punctuality is the life of 
 the universe. The planets keep exact time in their 
 revolutions, each as it circles around the sun coming 
 to its place yearly at the very moment it is due. 
 So, in business, punctuality is the soul of industry, 
 without which all its wheels come to a dead stand. 
 If the time of a business man be properly occupied 
 every hour will have its appropriate work. If the 
 work of one hour be postponed to another it must 
 encroach upon the time of some other duty, or re- 
 main undone, and thus the whole business of the day 
 is thrown into disorder. If that which is first at 
 hand be not instantly, steadily, and regularly dis- 
 patched other things accumulate behind, till affairs 
 begin to accumulate all at once, and no human brain 
 can stand the pressure. 
 
 Punctuality should be made not only a point of 
 courtesy but a point of conscience. The beginner in 
 business should make this virtue one of the first ob- 
 jects of professional acquisition. Let him not deceive 
 himself with the idea that it is easy of attainment, or 
 that he can practice it by and by, when the necessity 
 of it shall be more cogent. If in youth it is not easy 
 to be punctual, then in after life, when the character 
 is fixed, when the mental and moral faculties have 
 acquired a rigidity, to unlearn the habit of tardi- 
 ness is almost an impossibility. It still holds a man 
 
148 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 enthralled, though the reason be fully convinced of 
 its criminality and inconvenience. 
 
 A right estimate of the value of time is the best 
 and surest foundation for habits of punctuality, for 
 you are not likely to economize time, either for your- 
 self or others, unless you fully realize how valuable 
 it is, and when lost how utterly irreclaimable. The 
 successful men in every calling have had a keen sense 
 of the value of time — they have been misers of min- 
 utes. Hence you must try and realize the value of 
 time. Each hour, as it passes swiftly away, is gone 
 forever. Lost wealth may be replaced by toil and 
 industry; lost friends may be regained by considera- 
 tion and patience ; lost health may be recovered by 
 medical skill and care; even lost happiness and 
 peace of mind may be restored ; but lost time, never. 
 Whilst you read these lines it is being numbered with 
 the dead past and dying present. There is no recall- 
 ing it ; there is no regaining it ; there is no restoring 
 it. You must make the most of time as it flies. You 
 have no right to waste your own, still less, then, that 
 of others, by your lack of punctuality. 
 
 Not only should a person be thus punctual in all 
 his express engagements and appointments, but in 
 all his implied ones as well. If he has a regular 
 hour for his shop or office, let it find him there, at 
 his desk and at work. Punctuality in the perform- 
 ance of known duties other than the keeping of ap- 
 pointments is also one of the chief promoters of 
 success in life. If a certain work or other duty is to 
 be performed, we are too prone to put it off for a 
 
PUNCTUALITY. 149 
 
 more convenient season. Such delays are often a 
 fruitful source of after troubles. How many -business 
 men have been brought to bankruptcy and ruin by the 
 failure of one man to meet his obligations promptly! 
 How many times are we put to great work and ex- 
 pense because we neglected, or put off, the perform- 
 ance of admitted duties ! It is easy to say, " Wait 
 awhile ;" so easy to let the burden of to-day's work 
 and duties fall on to-morrow. But when to-morrow 
 comes it has its own peculiar duties, and the result 
 is, we simply have extra burdens to meet when the 
 time finally comes that our work can no longer be 
 delayed. 
 
 Punctuality is a virtue that can give force and 
 power to an otherwise utterly insignificant character. 
 Like charity, it covers a multitude of sins. It were 
 easy to show by examples from the lives of great 
 men that their success in life was owing in a large 
 measure to their habits of punctuality. All great 
 commanders have possessed this faculty in an emi- 
 nent degree. The reason punctuality is such an in- 
 variable element of success is not hard to determine. 
 The punctual person, one who always lives up to his 
 engagements, and is prompt in fulfilling his implied 
 duties as well, is just the person whose business is 
 conducted after the most approved forms and meth- 
 ods. They are the ones who have time at their dis- 
 posal to cast their eyes over the field of legitimate 
 enterprise, and at once adopt whatever may seem to 
 them to possess real excellence. Having met all 
 their engagements promptly, their word is as good 
 
150 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 as their bond, their credit unshaken ; in short, every 
 avenue of success is open to them. 
 
 But with those persons who are habitually behind 
 in the fulfillment of their duties, their business is 
 generally in a very unsettled state. They have not 
 that freshness and business vivacity and life which is 
 always observable in the man who drives his business 
 instead of allowing it to drive him. What wonder, 
 then, that they sink beneath the load of accumulated 
 cares, give up the great battle of life in despair, and 
 are content to fill a subordinate place in the economy 
 of the world ? Would that young men thought more 
 of what is involved in punctuality ! It is not merely 
 the " being on time," but it imports such a habit 
 that, carried into life, it is one of the main instru- 
 ments in making real youthful dreams of success. It 
 is that which makes business a pleasure instead of a 
 drudgery. It is that which goes so far in building 
 up a reputation of sagacity, skill, and integrity. 
 
 No one can have a high opinion of a person who 
 is so regardless of punctuality, even in small matters, 
 as to be continually breaking his word, under the 
 impression that " it is of no consequence,' ' as so 
 many often say, to excuse their habit of being false 
 to their word. There are some persons who seldom, 
 or never, do as they promised. We know persons, 
 who in other respects are worthy people, who can 
 scarcely command confidence, because they are so 
 slack in fulfilling their engagements and meeting 
 their obligations in small matters. We know young 
 men of promise who are daily losing ground among 
 
CONCENTRATION. 151 
 
 their acquaintances for a similar reason. A man will 
 soon ruin himself this way. In all business transac- 
 tions, in all engagements, let all do exactly as they 
 say, — be punctual to the minute ; even a little before- 
 hand is far preferable to being a little behind time. 
 Such a habit secures a composure which is essential 
 to happiness. 
 
 JN this day, when so many things are clamoring 
 for attention, the first law of success may be said 
 to be concentration. It is impossible to be suc- 
 cessful in every branch of business, or renowned 
 in every department of a professional life. We must 
 learn to bend our energies to one point, and to go 
 directly to that point, looking neither to the right nor 
 to the left. It has been said that a great deal of the 
 wisdom of a man in this century is shown in leaving 
 things unknown, and a great deal of *his practical 
 ability in leaving things undone. The day of univer- 
 sal scholarships is past. Life is short, and art is 
 long. The range of human wisdom has increased so 
 enormously that no human brain can grapple with it, 
 and the man who would know one thing well must 
 have the courage to be ignorant of a thousand other 
 things, however attractive or interesting. As with 
 knowledge, so with work. The man who would get 
 along must single out his specialty, and into that 
 
152 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 must pour the whole stream of his activity — all the 
 energies of his hand, eye, tongue, heart, and brain. 
 Broad culture, many-sidedness, are beautiful things 
 to contemplate ; but it is the narrow-edged men — the 
 men of one single and intense purpose — who steel 
 the soul against all things else, that accomplish the 
 hard work of the world. 
 
 The great men of every age who have had the 
 arduous task to shape human destiny have been men 
 of one idea impelled by resolute energy. Take 
 those names that are historic, and, with the exception 
 of a few great creative minds, you find them to be 
 men who are identified with some one achievement 
 upon which their life force was spent. The great 
 majority of men must concentrate their energies upon 
 the complete mastery of some one profession, trade, 
 or calling, or they will experience the disappointment 
 of those whose empire has been lost in the ambition 
 of universal conquest. A man may have the most 
 dazzling talents, but if they are scattered upon many 
 objects he will accomplish nothing. Strength is like 
 gunpowder : to be effective it needs concentration 
 and aim. The marksman who aims at the whole tar- 
 get will seldom hit the center. The literary man or 
 philosopher may revel among the sweetest and most 
 beautiful flowers of thought, but unless he gathers or 
 condenses these in the honeycomb of some great 
 thought or work, his finest conceptions will be lost 
 or useless. 
 
 The world has few universal geniuses who are 
 capable of mastering a dozen languages, arts, or 
 
CONCENTRATION. 153 
 
 sciences, or driving a dozen callings abreast. Be- 
 ginners in life are perpetually complaining of the dis- 
 advantages under which they labor; but it is an 
 indisputable fact that more persons fail from a mul- 
 tiplicity of pursuits and pretensions than from a 
 poverty of resources. "The one prudence in life," 
 says a shrewd American essayist, "is concentration, 
 the one evil is dissipation ; and it makes no difference 
 whether our dissipations are coarse or fine, property 
 and its cares, friends and a social habit, politics, 
 music, or feasting. Every thing is good which takes 
 away one plaything and delusion more, and drives us 
 home to add one stroke of faithful work." The 
 gardener does not suffer the sap to be driven into a 
 thousand channels merely to develop a myriad of 
 profitless twigs. He prunes the branches, and leaves 
 the vital juices to be absorbed by a few vigorous, 
 fruit-bearing branches. 
 
 While the highest ability accomplishes but little 
 if scattered on a multiplicity of objects, on the other 
 hand, if one has but a thimbleful of brains, and con- 
 centrates them upon the thing he has in hand, he may 
 achieve miracles. Momentum in physics, if properly 
 directed, will drive a tallow candle through an inch 
 board. Just so will oneness of aim and the direction 
 of the energies to a single pursuit, while all others 
 are waived, enable the veriest weakling to make his 
 mark where he strikes. The general who scatters 
 his soldiers all about the country insures defeat ; so 
 does he whose attention is diffused through innumer- 
 able channels, so that it can not gather in force on 
 
154 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 any one point. The human mind, in short, resembles 
 a burning-glass, whose rays are intense only as they 
 are concentrated. As the glass burns only when its 
 rays are converged to a focal point, so the former 
 illumes the world of science, literature, or business 
 only when it is directed to a solitary object. What 
 is more powerless than the scattered clouds of steam 
 as they rise to the sky? They are as impotent as 
 the dew-drop that falls nightly upon the earth ; but 
 concentrated and condensed in a steam boiler they 
 are able to cut through solid rock, to hurl mountains 
 into the sea, and to bring the antipodes to our doors. 
 It is the lack of concentration and wholeness 
 which distinguishes the shabby, half-hearted, and 
 blundering — the men who make the mob of life — 
 from those who win victories. In slower times suc- 
 cess might have been won by the man who gave but 
 a corner of his brain to the work in hand, but in 
 these days of keen competition it demands the in- 
 tensest application of the thinking faculty. Exclusive 
 dealings in worldly pursuits is a principle of hundred- 
 headed power. By dividing his time among too 
 many objects, a man of genius often becomes diamond 
 dust instead of diamond. The time spent by many 
 persons in profitless, desultory reading would, if con- 
 centrated upon a single line of study, have made 
 them masters of an entire branch of literature or 
 science. Distraction of pursuits is the rock upon 
 which most unsuccessful persons split in early life. 
 In law, in medicine, in trade, in the mechanical pro- 
 fessions the most successful persons have been those 
 
CONCENTRATION. 155 
 
 who have stuck to one thing. Nine out of ten men 
 lay out their plans on too vast a scale, and they who 
 are competent to do almost any thing do nothing, 
 because they never make up their minds distinctly as 
 to what they want or what they intend to be. 
 
 We are often compelled to a choice of acquisi- 
 tions, for there are some things the possession of 
 which is incompatible with the possession of others, 
 and the sooner this truth is known and recognized 
 the better the chances of success and happiness. 
 Much material good must be resigned if we would 
 attain the highest degree of moral excellence, and 
 many spiritual joys must be foregone if we resolve at 
 all risks to win great material advantages. To strive 
 for a high personal position, and yet expect to have 
 all the delights of leisure ; to labor for vast riches, 
 and yet to ask for freedom from anxiety and care, 
 and all the happiness which flows from a contented 
 mind ; to indulge in sensual gratifications, and yet 
 demand health, strength, and vigor; to live for self, 
 and yet to look for the joys that spring from a vir- 
 tuous and self-denying life — is to ask for impossi- 
 bilities. 
 
 If you start for success you must expect to pay 
 its price. It can not be won by feeble, half-way 
 efforts, neither is it to be acquired because sought 
 for in a dozen different directions. It demands that 
 you bring to your chosen profession or calling energy, 
 industry, and, above all, that singleness of purpose 
 which is willing to devote the energies of a life-time 
 to its accomplishment. Mere wishing and sighing 
 
156 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 brings it not. Many little calls of society on your 
 time must pass unheeded. You can not expect to 
 live tranquilly and at your ease, but to be up and 
 doing, with all your energies devoted to the one 
 point kept constantly in view. Cultivate this habit 
 of concentration if you would succeed in business ; 
 make it a second nature. Have a work for every 
 moment, and mind the moment's work. Whatever 
 your calling, master all its bearings and details, all 
 its principles, instruments, and applications. We have 
 so much work ahead of us that must be done if we 
 would reach the point desired that we must save our 
 strength as much as possible. Concentration affords 
 a great safe-guard against exhaustion. He who scat- 
 ters himself on many objects soon loses his energy, 
 and with his energy his enthusiasm — and how is suc- 
 cess possible without enthusiasm? 
 
 It becomes, then, of importance to be sure we 
 have started right in the race for distinction. Every 
 beginner in life should strive early to ascertain the 
 strong faculty of his mind or body fitting him for 
 some special pursuit, and direct his utmost energies 
 to bring it to perfection. There is no adaptation or 
 universal applicability in man ; but each has his special 
 talent, and the mastery of successful men is in 
 adroitly keeping themselves where and when that 
 turn shall need oftenest to be practiced. 
 
 Though one must be wholly absorbed to win suc- 
 cess, still singleness of aim by no means implies 
 monotony of action; but if we would be felt on this 
 stirring planet, if we would strike the world with 
 
CONCENTRATION. 157 
 
 lasting force, we must be men of one thing. Having 
 found the thing we have to do we must throw into 
 it all the energies of our being, seeking its accom- 
 plishment at whatever hazard or sacrifice. But that 
 does not prevent us from participating in the enjoy- 
 ments of life. If you are sent on business to some 
 foreign land, though bent on business, still you can 
 admire, as you hurry along, the beautiful scenery 
 from the car windows; you can note the strange 
 places through which you pass ; you can observe the 
 wondrous sublimity of the ocean without being dis- 
 tracted from the main objects of your travels. So 
 it is not to be inferred from what has been said 
 that concentration means isolation or self-absorption. 
 There may be a hundred accessories in life, provided 
 they contribute to one result. 
 
 In urging the importance of concentration, and 
 of sticking to one thing, we do not mean that any 
 man should be a mere lawyer, a mere doctor, or 
 a mere merchant or mechanic, and nothing more. 
 These are cases of one-sidedness pushed too far. 
 There is no more pitiable wreck than the man 
 whose one giant faculty has drowned the rest. Man 
 dwarfs himself if he pushes too far the doctrine of 
 the subdivision of labor. Success is purchased too 
 dear if to attain it one has subordinated all his fac- 
 ulties and tastes to one master passion, and become 
 transformed into a head, a hand, or an arm, instead of 
 a man. Every man ought to be something more than 
 a factor in some grand formula of social or econom- 
 ical science, a cog or pulley in some grand machine. 
 
158 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 Let every one take care, first 'of all, to be a man, 
 cultivating and developing, as far as possible, all of 
 his powers on a symmetrical plan; and then let him 
 expend his chief labors on the one faculty, which 
 nature, by making it prominent, has given a hint 
 should be especially cultivated. There is, indeed, no 
 profession upon which a high degree of knowledge 
 will not continually bear. Things which, at first 
 glance, seem most remote from it will often be 
 brought into close approximation to it, and acqui- 
 sitions which the narrow-minded might deem a hin- 
 drance will sooner or later yield something servicea- 
 ble. Nothing is more beautiful than to see a man 
 hold his art, trade, or calling in an easy, disengaged 
 way, wearing it as the soldier does his sword, which, 
 once laid aside, the accomplished soldier gives you 
 no hint that he has ever worn. Too often this is not 
 the case, and the shop-keeper irresistibly reminds 
 you of the shop, and the scholar, who should remind 
 you that he has been on Parnassus only by the odors 
 of the flowers he has crushed, which cling to his 
 feet, affronts you with a huge nosegay stuck in his 
 bosom. 
 
 One can make all his energies bear on one im- 
 portant point and yet show himself a man among 
 men by his interest in matters of public concern. 
 He can endear himself to the community by kindly 
 acts to the distressed, as well as completely master- 
 ing, in all its bearings, the one great work which he 
 has taken *ipon himself as his life's work. Then 
 take up your task. Remember that you must mar- 
 
DECISION. 159 
 
 shall all your forces at one point, and move in one 
 direction, if you would accomplish what your desires 
 have painted ; but also remember that you are a 
 human being, and not a machine, and that as you 
 pass on the journey of life you should, as far as 
 possible, without insuring defeat, take note of the 
 wonders which nature has spread before you, should 
 ponder on what history says of the past, should 
 muse over the solemn import of life, and thus, while 
 winning laurels for your brow, and achieving your 
 heart's desire, develop in you the faculties which go 
 to make, in its complete meaning, a man or woman. 
 
 pKHERE is one quality of mind which of all others 
 5 is most likely to make our fortunes if combined 
 
 ?T with talents, or to ruin them without it. We 
 allude to that quality of the mind which under 
 given circumstances acts with a mathematical preci- 
 sion. With such minds to resolve and to act is 
 instantaneous. They seem to precede the march of 
 events, to foresee results in the chrysalis of their causes, 
 and to seize that moment for exertion which others 
 use in deliberation. There are occasions when action 
 must be taken at once. There is no time to long 
 and carefully calculate the chances. The occasion 
 calls for immediate action ; and the call must be met, 
 or the time goes by, and our utmost exertions can not 
 
160 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 bring it back. At such times is seen the triumph of 
 those who have carefully trained all their faculties to 
 a habit of prompt decision. They seize the occasion, 
 and make the thought start into instant action ; they 
 at once plan and perform, resolve and execute. 
 
 It is but a truism to say that there can be no suc- 
 cess in life without decision of character. Even 
 brains are secondary in importance to will. The 
 intellect is but the half of a man ; the will is the 
 driving-wheel, the spring of motive power. A vacil- 
 lating man, no matter what his abilities, is invariably 
 pushed aside in the race of life by one of determined 
 will. It is he who resolves to succeed, and at every 
 fresh rebuff begins resolutely again, that reaches the 
 goal. The shores of fortune are covered with the 
 stranded wrecks of men of brilliant abilities, but who 
 have wanted courage, faith, and decision, and have 
 therefore perished in sight of more resolute, but less 
 capable adventurers, who succeeded in making port. 
 Hundreds of men go to their graves in obscurity 
 who have remained obscure only because they lacked 
 the pluck to make the first effort, and who, could 
 they only have resolved to begin, would have aston- 
 ished the world by their achievements and successes. 
 
 To do any thing in this world that is worth doing 
 we must not stand shivering on the bank, and think- 
 ing of the cold and the danger, but jump in and 
 scramble through as well as we can. The world was 
 not made for slow, squeamish, fastidious men, but for 
 those who act promptly and with power. Obstacles 
 and perplexities every man must meet, and he must 
 
DECISION. 161 
 
 either conquer them or they will conquer him. Hesi- 
 tation is a sign of weakness, for inasmuch as the 
 comparative good and evil of the different modes of 
 action about which we hesitate are seldom equally 
 balanced, a strong mind should perceive the slightest 
 inclination of the beam with the glance of an eagle, 
 particularly as there will be cases where the prepon- 
 derance will be very minute, even though there should 
 be life in one scale and death in the other. It is 
 better occasionally to decide wrong than to be for- 
 ever wavering and hesitating, now veering to this 
 side and then to that, with all the misery and disaster 
 that follow from continual doubt. 
 
 It has been truly said that the great moral vic- 
 tories and defeats of the world often turn on minutes. 
 Fortune is proverbially a fickle jade, and there is 
 nothing like promptness of action, the timing of 
 things at the lucky moment, to force her to surrender 
 her favors. Crises come, the seizing of which is 
 triumph, the neglect of which is ruin. It is this lack 
 of promptness, so characteristic of the gladiatorial 
 intellect, of this readiness to meet every attack of 
 ill-fortune with counter resources of evasion, which 
 causes so many defeats of life. 
 
 There is a race of narrow wits that never succeed 
 
 for want of courage. Their understanding is of that 
 
 halting, hesitating kind, which gives just light enough 
 
 to see difficulties and start doubts, but not enough 
 
 to surmount the one or remove the other. They do 
 
 not know what force of character means. They seem 
 
 to have no backbone, but only the mockery of a 
 
 ii 
 
162 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 vertebral' column made of india-rubber, equally pliant 
 in all directions. They come and go like shadows, 
 sandwich their sentences with apologies, are over- 
 taken by events while still irresolute, and let the tide 
 ebb before they feebly push off. Always brooding 
 over their plans, but never executing them. It is 
 scarcely possible to conceive of a more unhappy man 
 than one afflicted with this infirmity. It has been 
 remarked that there are persons who lack decision 
 to such a degree that they seem never to have made 
 up their mind which leg to stand upon ; who deliber- 
 ate in an agony of choice when not a grain's weight 
 depends upon the decision, or the question what road 
 to walk upon, what bundle of hay to munch first ; to 
 be undetermined where the case is plain and the 
 necessity so urgent ; to be always intending to lead 
 a new life, but never finding time to set about it. 
 There is nothing more pitiable in the world than such 
 an irresolute man thus oscillating between extremes, 
 who would willingly join the two, but does not per- 
 ceive that nothing can unite them. 
 
 Indecision is a slatternly housewife, by whose fault 
 the moth and rust are allowed to make such dull 
 work of life. " A man without decision," says John 
 Foster, "can never be said to belong to himself, 
 since if he dared to assert that he did the puny force 
 of some cause about as powerful, you would have 
 supposed, as a spider, may make a seizure of the 
 unhappy boaster the very next minute, and contempt- 
 uously exhibit the futility of the determinations by 
 which he was to have proved the independence of 
 
DECISION. 163 
 
 his understanding and will. He belongs to whatever 
 can make capture of him ; and one thing after an- 
 other vindicates its right to him by arresting him 
 while he is trying to proceed, as twigs and chips 
 floating near the edge of a river are intercepted by 
 every weed, and whirled in every little eddy. Hav- 
 ing concluded on a design, he may pledge himself to 
 accomplish it, if the hundred diversities of feeling 
 which may come within the week will let him. His 
 character precludes all foresight of his conduct. He 
 may sit and wonder what form and direction his 
 views and actions are destined to take to-morrow, as 
 a farmer has often to acknowledge that next day's 
 proceedings are at the disposal of its winds and 
 clouds. 
 
 A great deal of the unhappiness and much of the 
 vice of the world is owing to weakness and indecision 
 of purpose. The will, which is the central force of 
 character, must be trained to habits of decision ; oth- 
 erwise it will neither be able to resist evil nor to 
 follow good. Decision gives the power of standing 
 firmly when to yield, however slightly, might be only 
 the first step in a down-hill course to ruin. Calling 
 upon others for help in forming a decision is worse 
 than useless. A man must so train his habits as to 
 rely upon his own powers, and to depend upon his 
 own courage in moments of emergency. Many are 
 the valiant purposes formed that end merely in words ; 
 deeds intended that are never done ; designs pro- 
 jected that are never begun ; and all for the want 
 of a little courageous decision. Better far the silent 
 
164 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 tongue, but the eloquent deed ; and the most decisive 
 answer of all is doing. There is nothing more to be 
 admired than a manly firmness and decision of char- 
 acter. We admire a person who knows his own 
 mind and sticks to it, who sees at once what is to 
 be done in given circumstances, and does it. 
 
 There never was a time in the world's history 
 that called more earnestly upon all persons to culti- 
 vate a firm, manly decision of character, to be able to 
 say No to the seductive power of temptation. There 
 is no more beautiful trait of character to be found 
 than that of a determined will guided by right mo- 
 tives. To talk beautifully is one thing, but to act with 
 promptitude when the time of action has fully come is 
 as far superior to the former as the brilliant sunlight 
 surpasses the reflection of the moon. To train the 
 mind to act with decision is of no less consequence 
 than of acting promptly when the decision is reached. 
 Of all intellectual gifts bestowed upon man there is 
 nothing more intoxicating than readiness — the power 
 of calling all the resources of the mind into simultane- 
 ous action at a moment's notice. Nothing strikes the 
 unready as so miraculous as this promptitude in oth- 
 ers ; nothing impresses him with so dull and envious 
 a sense of contrast with himself. This want of decis- 
 ion is to be laid on the shelf, to creep where others 
 fly, to fall into permanent discouragement. To pos- 
 sess decision is to have the mind's intellectual prop- 
 erty put out at fifty or one hundred per cent ; to be 
 uncertain at the moment of trial is to be dimly con- 
 scious of faculties tied up somewhere in a napkin. 
 
DECISION. 165 
 
 Decision of mind, like vigor of body, is a gift of God. 
 It can not be created by human effort ; it can only 
 be cultivated. But every mind has the germ of this 
 quality, which can be strengthened by favorable cir- 
 cumstances and motives presented to the mind, and 
 by method and order in the prosecution of duties or 
 tasks. 
 
 But with all that has been urged in favor of de- 
 cision and dispatch, we would not be understood as 
 advising undue haste. There are occasions when 
 caution and delay are necessary, when to act without 
 long and careful deliberation would be madness. But 
 when the way is clear, when there is no doubt as to 
 what ought to be done, then it is that decision de- 
 mands that an instant choice be made between the 
 two — not to hesitate too long as to which, but to 
 decide promptly, and then move ahead. Even in 
 cases where deliberation and caution are necessary, 
 decision demands that the mind acts quickly. In a 
 word, decision finds us engaged in a life-battle. If 
 the victory is ours, success and fortune wait upon us ; 
 if we are overthrown, want and misery stare us in 
 the face ; it is well to make our movements only with 
 caution, but when we see a chance we must at once 
 improve it, or it is gone. Occasions also arise when 
 we must rouse our forces on an instant's warning, 
 and to make movements for which we have no time 
 to calculate the chances. Then is seen the triumph 
 of the decisive, ready man. To falter is to be lost ; 
 to move with dispatch is the only safety. 
 
166 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 m: 
 
 ^^eoj^rt>T^jie% 
 
 pSOTH poetry and philosophy are prodigal of eu- 
 logy over the mind which rescues itself, by its 
 own energy, from a captivity to custom, which 
 breaks the common bonds of empire and cuts 
 a Simplon over mountains of difficulty for its own 
 purposes, whether of good or of evil. We can not 
 help admiring such a character. It is a positive re- 
 lief to turn from the contemplation of those relying 
 on some one else for a solution of the difficulties 
 that surround them to those who are strong in their 
 own self-reliance, who, when confronted with fresh 
 trials and difficulties, only put on a more determined 
 mien, and more resolutely apply their own powers 
 to remove the obstacle so unexpectedly put in their 
 way. There is no surer sign of an unmanly and 
 cowardly spirit than a vague desire for help, a wish 
 to depend, to lean upon somebody and enjoy the 
 fruits of the industry of others 
 
 In the assurance of strength there is strength, 
 and they are the weakest, however strong, who have 
 no faith in themselves or their powers. Men often 
 conquer difficulties because they think they can. 
 Their confidence in themselves inspires confidence 
 in others. The man who makes every thing that 
 conduces to happiness to depend upon himself, and 
 not upon other men, on whose good or evil actions 
 his own doings are compelled to hinge, has adopted 
 the very best plan for living happily. This is the man 
 
SELF-CONFIDENCE. 167 
 
 of moderation, the possessor of manly character and 
 wisdom. By self-reliance is not meant self-conceit. 
 The two are widely different. Self-reliance is cogni- 
 zant of all the ills of earthly existence, and it rests 
 on a rational consciousness of power to contend with 
 them. It counts the cost of the conflict with real 
 life, and calmly concludes that it is able to meet the 
 foes which stand in frowning array on the world's 
 great battle-field. Self-conceit, on the other hand, 
 is a vainglorious assertion of power. It knows not 
 the real difficulties it has to contend with, and is too 
 supercilious to inquire into them. It rejects well- 
 meant offers of counsel or assistance. It feels above 
 taking advice. The unhappy possessor of such a 
 trait of character is far from being a self-reliant man. 
 It has been said God never intended that strong, 
 independent beings should be reared by clinging to 
 others, like the ivy to the oak, for support. The 
 difficulties, hardships, and trials of life — the obstacles 
 one encounters on the road to fortune — are positive 
 blessings. They knit his muscles more firmly, and 
 teach him self-reliance, just as by wrestling with an 
 athlete who is superior to us we increase our own 
 strength and learn the secret of his skill. All difficul- 
 ties come to us, as Bunyan says of temptation, like the 
 lion which met Sampson, the first time we encounter 
 them they roar and gnash their teeth, but once sub- 
 dued we find a nest of honey in them. Peril is the 
 very element in which power is developed. Do n't 
 rely upon your friends, nor rely upon the name of 
 your ancestor. Thousands have spent the prime of 
 
168 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 life in the vain hope of help from those whom they 
 called friends, and many thousands have starved be- 
 cause they had a rich father. 
 
 Rely upon the good name which is made by your 
 own exertions, and know that better than the best 
 friend you can have is unconquerable determination 
 of spirit, united with decision of character. Seek 
 such attainments as will enable you to confide in 
 yourself, to rise equal to your emergencies. Strive 
 to acquire an inward principle of self-support. Help 
 yourself and heaven will help you, should be the 
 motto of every man who would make himself useful 
 in the world or carve his way to riches and honor. 
 It is an old saying, "He who has lost confidence can 
 lose nothing more." The man who dares not follow 
 his own independent judgment, but runs perpetually 
 to others for advice, becomes at last a moral weak- 
 ling and an intellectual dwarf. Such a man has not 
 self within him, and believes in no self, but goes as 
 a suppliant to others and entreats of them, one after 
 another, to lend him theirs. He is, in fact, a mere 
 element of a human being, and is borne about the 
 world an insignificant cipher, unless he desperately 
 fastens to other floating and supplementary elements, 
 with which he may form a species of incorporation 
 resembling a man. Any young man who will thus 
 part with freedom and the self-respect that grows out 
 of self-reliance and self-support is unmanly, neither 
 deserving of assistance nor capable of making good 
 use of it. 
 
 Hardship is the native soil of manhood and self- 
 
SELF- CONFIDENCE. 169 
 
 reliance. Opposition is what we want and must have 
 to be good for any thing. Men seem neither to un- 
 derstand their riches nor their own strength. Of the 
 former they believe greater things than they should ; 
 of the latter, much less. Self-reliance and self-denial 
 will teach a man to drink of his own cistern, and eat 
 bread from his own kitchen, and learn to labor truly 
 to get his living, and carefully to expend the good 
 things committed to his care. Every youth should 
 be made to feel that if he would get through the 
 world usefully and happily he must rely mainly upon 
 himself and his own independent energies. Young 
 men should never hear any language but this: " You 
 have your own way to make, and it depends upon 
 your exertion whether you starve or not. Outside 
 help is your greatest curse. It handicaps efforts, 
 stifles aspirations, shuts the door upon emulation, 
 turns the key upon energy." The custom of making 
 provisions to assist worthy young men in obtaining 
 an education is often a positive evil to the recipient. 
 The germ of self-reliant energy, which else would 
 have done so much for his material good, is stifled 
 in its growth by the mistaken kindness of benevolent 
 beings. And no mental acquisitions can compensate 
 any young man for loss of self-reliance. 
 
 It is not the men who have been reared in afflu- 
 ence who have left the most enduring traces on the 
 world. It is not in the sheltered garden or the hot- 
 house, but on the rugged Alpine cliffs, where the 
 storms beat most violently, that the toughest plants 
 are reared. Men who are trained to self-reliance are 
 
170 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 ready to go out and contend in the sternest conflicts 
 of life, while those who have always leaned for sup- 
 port on others around them are never prepared to 
 breast the storms of adversity that arise. Self- 
 reliance is more than a passive trust in one's own 
 powers. It shows itself in an active manner ; it 
 demonstrates itself in works. It is not ashamed of 
 its pretentions, but invites inspection and asks recog- 
 nition. Because there is danger of invoicing your- 
 self above your real value, it does not follow that you 
 should always underrate your worth. Because to be 
 conspicuous, honored, and known you should not 
 retire upon the center of your own conscious re- 
 sources, you need not necessarily be always at the 
 circumference. An excess of modesty is well-nigh 
 as bad as an excess of pride, for it is, in fact, an ex- 
 cess of pride in another form, though it is question- 
 able if this be not more hurtful to the individual and 
 less beneficial to society than gross and unblushing 
 vanity. 
 
 It is true, we all patronize humility in the abstract, 
 and, when enshrined in another, we admire it. It is a 
 pleasure to meet a man who does not pique our 
 vanity, or thrust himself between us and the object 
 of our pretensions. There is no one who, if ques- 
 tioned, would not be found in the depths of his heart 
 secretly to prefer the modest man, proportionally 
 despising the swaggerer "who goes unbidden to the 
 head of the feast." But while such is our deliberate 
 verdict when taken to task in the matter, it is not the 
 one we practically give. The man who entertains a 
 
SELF-CONFIDENCE. 171 
 
 a good, stout opinion of himself always contrives 
 somehow to cheat us out of a corresponding one, 
 and we are too apt to acquiesce in his assumption, 
 even though they may strike us unpleasantly. Nor 
 need this excite our surprise. The great mass of 
 men have no time to examine the merits of others. 
 They are busy about their own affairs, which claim 
 all their attention. They can not go about hunting 
 modest worth in every nook and corner. Those who 
 would secure their good opinion must come forward 
 with their claims, and at least show their own con- 
 fidence by backing them with vigorous assertions. 
 
 If, therefore, a man of fair talents arrays his pre- 
 tensions before us, if he duns and pesters us for an 
 admission of his merits, obtruding them upon us, 
 we are forced at last to notice them, and, unless he 
 fairly disgusts us by the extravagance of his claims, 
 shocking all sense of decency, we are inclined to 
 admit them, even in preference to superior merits, 
 which their possessor by his own actions seem to 
 underrate. It is too often cant by which indolent 
 and irresolute men seek to lay their want of success 
 at the door of the public. Well-matured and well- 
 disciplined talent is always sure of a market, provided 
 it exerts itself; but it must not cower at home and 
 expect to be sought after. There is a good deal of 
 cant, too, about the successes of forward and impu- 
 dent men, while men of retiring worth are overlooked. 
 But it usually happens that those forward men have 
 that valuable quality of promptness and activity, with- 
 out which worth is a mere inoperative quality. 
 
172 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 The conclusion of the whole matter is, that in this 
 busy, bustling period of the world's history self- 
 confidence is almost an essential trait of character in 
 one who means to get along well and win his way to 
 success and fortune. This may exist entirely inde- 
 pendent of self-conceit, the two being by no means 
 necessarily concomitant. He must remember that he 
 can not expect to have people repose confidence in 
 his ability unless he displays confidence in them him- 
 self. If poverty be his lot, and troubles and dis- 
 couragements of all kinds press upon him, let him 
 take heart and push resolutely ahead, cultivating a 
 strong, self-reliant disposition. By so doing he will 
 rise superior to misfortune. He will learn to rely 
 on his own resources, to look within himself for the 
 means wherewith to combat the ills that press upon 
 him. By such a course of action he takes the road 
 which most surely leads to success. 
 
 
 &££effil€80i M&MJW. 
 
 T is a common saying that the man of practical 
 fjfts ability far surpasses the theorist. Just what is 
 W meant by practical ability is, perhaps, hard to 
 explain. It is more easy to tell what it is not 
 than what it is. It recognizes the fact that life is 
 action ; that mere thoughts and schemes will avail 
 nothing unless subsequently wrought out in action. 
 It is an indescribable quality which results from a 
 
PRACTICAL TALENTS. 173 
 
 union of worldly knowledge with shrewdness and tact. 
 He that sets out on the journey of life with a pro- 
 found knowledge of books, but with a shallow knowl- 
 edge of men, with much of the sense of others, 
 but with little of his own, will find himself com- 
 pletely at a loss on occasions of common and con- 
 stant recurrence. 
 
 Speculative ability is one thing, and practical abil- 
 ity is another ; and the man who in his study or with 
 his pen in hand shows himself capable of forming 
 large views of life and policy, may in the outer world 
 be found altogether unfitted for carrying them into 
 practical effect. Speculative ability depends on vig- 
 orous thinking, practical ability in vigorous acting, 
 and the two qualities are usually found combined in 
 very unequal proportions. The speculative man is 
 prone to indecision ; he sees all sides of a question, 
 and his action becomes suspended in nicely weighing 
 the arguments for and against, which are often found 
 nearly to balance each other ; whereas the practical 
 man overleaps logical preliminaries and arrives at 
 certain definite convictions, and proceeds forthwith to 
 carry his policy into action. The mere theorist rarely 
 displays practical ability ; and, conversely, the prac- 
 tical man rarely displays a high degree of speculative 
 wisdom. If you try to carve a stone with a razor, 
 the razor will lose its edge, and the stone remain 
 uncut. A high education, unless it is practical as 
 well as classical, often unfits a man for contest with 
 his fellow-man. Intellectual culture, if carried beyond 
 a certain point, is too often purchased at the expense 
 
174 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 of moral vigor. It gives edge and splendor to a man, 
 but draws out all his temper. 
 
 In all affairs of life, but more especially in those 
 great enterprises which require the co-operation of 
 others, a knowledge of men is indispensable. This 
 knowledge implies not only quickness of penetration 
 and sagacity, but many other superior elements of 
 character ; for it is important to perceive not merely 
 in whom we can confide, but to maintain that influ- 
 ence over them which secures their good faith and 
 defeats the unworthy purpose of a wavering and dis- 
 honest mind. The world always laughs at those fail- 
 ures which arise from weakness of judgment and 
 defects of penetration. Practical wisdom is only to 
 be learned in the school of experience. Precepts and 
 instruction are useful so far as they go ; but without 
 the discipline of real life they remain of the nature 
 of theories only. The hard facts of existence give 
 that touch of truth to character which can never be 
 imparted by reading or tuition, but only by contact 
 with the broad instincts of common men and women. 
 
 Intellectual training is to be prized, but practical 
 knowledge is necessary to make it available. Expe- 
 rience gained from books, however valuable, is of the 
 nature of learning; experience gained from outward 
 life is wisdom ; and an ounce of the latter is worth a 
 pound of the former. Rich mental endowments, thor- 
 ough culture, great genius, brilliant parts have often 
 existed in company with very glaring deficiencies in 
 what may be called good judgment ; while there is a 
 certain stability of judgment and soundness of under- 
 
PRACTICAL TALENTS. 175 
 
 standing often displayed by those who have not an 
 extensive education. The old sailor knows nothing 
 of nautical astronomy. Azimuths, right ascensions, 
 and the solution of spherical triangles have no charm 
 and little meaning to him. But he can scan the seas 
 and skies and warn of coming danger with a natural 
 wisdom which all the keen intellect and ready math- 
 ematics of the young lieutenant do not afford. The 
 man who has traveled much accumulates a store of 
 useful information, and can give hints of practical wis- 
 dom which no deep study of geological lore or of 
 antiquarian research could afford. The student of 
 life rather than of books gains an understanding by 
 experience for which no store of erudition can prove 
 an adequate compensation. The true order of learn- 
 ing should be, first, what is necessary ; second, what 
 is useful ; and third, what is ornamental. To reverse 
 this arrangement is like beginning to build at the 
 top of the edifice. Practical ability depends in a 
 large measure on the employment of what is known 
 as common sense, which is the average sensibility and 
 intelligence of men undisturbed by individual pecul- 
 iarities. Fine sense and exalted sense are not half 
 as useful as common sense. There are forty men of 
 wit for one man of sense, and he that will carry noth- 
 ing but gold will be every day at a loss for readier 
 change. 
 
 The height of ability consists in a thorough knowl- 
 edge of the real value of things and of the genius of 
 the age we live in, and could we know by what 
 strange circumstances a man's genius becomes pre- 
 
176 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 pared for practical success, we should discover that 
 the most serviceable items in his education were 
 never entered in the bills his father paid for. That 
 knowledge of the world which inculcates strict vigi- 
 lance in regard to our individual interests and repre- 
 sentation, which recommends the mastery of things 
 to be held in our own hands, or which enables us to 
 live undamaged by the skillful maneuvers and crafty 
 plots of plausible men on the one hand or uncontam- 
 inated by the depravities of unprincipled ones on the 
 other, is of daily acquisition and equally accessible 
 to all. 
 
 The most learned of men do not always make the 
 best of teachers ; the lawyer who has achieved a 
 classical education is not always the most successful. 
 The men who have wielded power have not always 
 been graduates. Brindley and Stephenson did not 
 learn to read and write until they were twenty years 
 old ; yet the one gave England her railroads, and the 
 other her canals. The great inventor is one who has 
 walked forth upon the industrial world, not from uni- 
 versities, but from hovels ; not as clad in silks and 
 decked with honors, but as clad in fustian and grimed 
 with soot and oil. It is not known where he who in- 
 vented the plow was born, or where he died ; yet he 
 has effected more for the happiness of the world 
 than the whole race of heroes and conquerors who 
 drenched it in tears and blood, whose birth, parent- 
 age, and education have been handed down to us 
 with a precision proportionate to the mischief they 
 have done. Mankind owes more of its real happiness 
 
PRACTICAL TALENTS. 177 
 
 to this humble inventor than to some of the most 
 acute minds in the realm of literature. 
 
 Education, indeed, accomplishes wonders in fitting 
 a man for the work of success, but we sometimes for- 
 get that it is of more consequence to have the mind 
 well disciplined rather than richly stored, — strong 
 rather than full. Every day we see men of high 
 culture distanced in the race of life by the upstart 
 who can not spell. The practical dunce outstrips 
 the theorizing genius. Life teems with such illus- 
 trations. Men have ruled well who could not define 
 a commonwealth ; and they who did not understand 
 the shape of the earth have commanded a greater 
 portion of it. The want of practical talent in men 
 of fine intellectual powers has often excited the won- 
 der of the crowd. They are astonished that one 
 who has grasped, perhaps, the mightiest themes, and 
 shed a light on the path to be pursued by others, 
 should be unable to manage his own affairs with 
 dexterity. But this is not strange. Deep thinking 
 and practical talents require habits of mind almost 
 entirely dissimilar, and though they may, and often 
 do, exist conjointly, and while it is the duty of all to 
 strive to cultivate both, yet such is the constitution 
 of the human mind that it is apt to go to extremes. 
 And he who accustoms himself to deep prying into 
 nature's secrets, to exploring the hidden mysteries 
 of the past, is too apt to forget the practical details 
 of every-day life, to pass them by with disgust, as 
 altogether beneath his attention. This is an error, 
 and none the less reprehensible on that account than 
 
 12 
 
178 GOLDEX GEJIS OF LIFE. 
 
 is the conduct of those who become so engrossed 
 with the practical affairs of their calling or profession 
 as to forget that they have a higher nature, and sink 
 the man in the pursuit of their ambitious dreams. 
 
 A man who sees limitedly and clearly is both 
 more sure of himself and is more direct in deal- 
 ing with circumstances and with men than is a man 
 who has a large horizon of thought, whose many- 
 sided capacity embraces an immense extent of ob- 
 jects, just as the somnambulist treads with safety 
 where the wide-awake man could not hope to follow. 
 Practical men cut the knots which they can not untie, 
 and, overleaping all preliminaries, come at once to a 
 conclusion. Men of theoretical knowledge, on the 
 other hand, are tempted to waste time in comparing 
 and meditating when they should be up and doing. 
 Practical knowledge will not always of itself raise a 
 man to eminence, but for want of it many a man has 
 fallen short of distinction. Without it the best run- 
 ner, straining for the prize, finds himself suddenly 
 tripped up and lying on his back in the midst of the 
 race. Without it the subtlest theologian will live and 
 die in an obscure country village, and the acutest 
 legal mind fail of adorning the bench. The man who 
 lacks it may be a great thinker or a great worker. 
 He may be an acute reasoner and an eloquent 
 speaker, and yet, in spite of all this, fail of success. 
 There is a hitch, a stand-still, a mysterious want 
 somewhere. Little, impalpable trifles weave them- 
 selves into a web which holds him back. The fact 
 is, he is not sufficientlv in accord with his surround- 
 
EDUCATION. 179 
 
 ings. He has never seen the importance of adjust- 
 ing his scale of weights and measures to the popular 
 standard. In a word, he is not a man of the world, 
 in a popular sense. 
 
 While it may be very difficult to define this prac- 
 tical ability, which is so all-important, yet the path 
 to be pursued by him who would advance therein is 
 visible to all. It requires a shrewd and careful ob- 
 servance of men and things rather than of books. 
 It requires that the judgment be strengthened by 
 being called upon in apparently trivial affairs. The 
 memory must be trained to recall principles rather 
 than statements. All the faculties of the mind must 
 be trained to act with decision and dispatch. Edu- 
 cation must be regarded as a means and not as an 
 end. By these means, while admitting that practical 
 talents are, in their true sense, a gift of God, still 
 we can cultivate and bring them to perfection, and 
 by education and experience convert that which be- 
 fore lay dormant in the rough pebble into a dazzling 
 diamond. 
 
 iROM time immemorial intellectual endowments 
 have been crowned with bays of honor. Men 
 # have worshiped at the shrine of intellect with 
 an almost Eastern idolatry. Men of more than 
 an average endowment of intellect have been re- 
 garded as superior beings. The multitude have 
 
1 80 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 looked upon them with wonder. With reverent hands 
 the world at large has crowned intellect with its 
 richest honors. Its pathway has been strewn with 
 flowers ; its brow has worn the loftiest plume ; it has 
 held the mightiest scepter of power, and sat upon 
 the proudest throne. Evidence mightier than the 
 plaudits of admiring multitudes is every -where 
 found in the universe proclaiming the worth and 
 power of the human intellect. There can not be a 
 grander theme to engross the attention of all classes 
 than that subject which has to do with the training 
 of the intellect. The subject of education is fraught 
 with a deep interest to all who have a just apprecia- 
 tion of its merits. It should be of interest to all 
 within the pale of civilization, inasmuch as the happi- 
 ness of all classes is connected with the subject of 
 education. 
 
 Education is development. It is not simply in- 
 struction, facts, and rules communicated by the 
 teacher, but it is discipline, a waking up, a develop- 
 ment of latent powers, a growth of the mind. It 
 finds the child's mind passive ; it trains it to think 
 independently ; it awakens its powers to observe, to 
 reflect, to combine. It aims to bring into harmonious 
 action all the powers of the mind, not, as some sup- 
 pose, a cultivation of a few to the neglect of all the 
 rest. Education should have reference to the whole 
 man — the body, the mind, and the heart. Its object, 
 and, when rightly conducted, its effect, is to make 
 him a complete creature of his kind. To his frame 
 it would give vigor, activity, and beauty ; to his heart 
 
EDUCATION. 181 
 
 virtue ; to his senses correctness and acuteness. The 
 educated man is not the gladiator, nor the scholar, 
 nor the upright man alone, but a well balanced com- 
 bination of the three. The well-developed tree is 
 not one simply well rooted, nor with giant branches, 
 nor resplendent with rich foliage, but all of these 
 together. If you mark the perfect man you must 
 not look for him in the gymnasium, the university, or 
 the Church exclusively, but you look for the health- 
 ful mind in the healthful body, with a virtuous heart. 
 The being in whom you find this union is the only 
 one worthy to be called educated. 
 
 Education, strictly speaking, covers the whole 
 area of life. It is the word which means all that 
 God asks of us, all we owe the world or ourselves. 
 It expresses the sum total of human duty. Nor is it 
 confined to the present period of life. For aught we 
 know education may be continued in heaven. Rea- 
 son may continue to widen its powers and deepen its 
 sanctities there. The affections may grow in beauty 
 and fervor through innumerable ages. Mind may 
 expand and intensify through eternity. Education is 
 a work of progress. It begins in life, but has no 
 end. Death does not terminate it. We learn the 
 elements of things below ; above, we will study their 
 essence. We progress only by efforts. Whatever 
 expands the affection or enlarges the sphere of our 
 sympathies, whatever makes us feel our relation 
 to the universe, to the great and beneficial cause of 
 all, must unquestionably refine our nature and elevate 
 us in the scale of being. 
 
182 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 It requires extensive observation to enable us 
 even partially to appreciate the wonderful extent to 
 which all the faculties are developed by mental culti- 
 vation. The nervous system grows more vigorous 
 and active, the touch is more sensitive, and there is 
 greater mobility to the hand. Men are often like 
 knives with many blades. They know how to open 
 one and only one; the rest are buried in the handle, 
 and from misuse become useless. Education is the 
 knowledge of how to use the whole of one's self. 
 He is educated who knows how to make a tool of 
 every faculty, how to open it, how to keep it sharp, 
 and how to apply it to all practical purposes. Educa- 
 tion is of three parts, — from nature, from man, and 
 from things. The development of our faculties and 
 organs is the education of nature ; that of man is the 
 application we learn to make of this very developing ; 
 and that of things is the experience we acquire in 
 regard to different objects by which we are affected. 
 All that we have not at our birth, and all that we have 
 acquired in the years of our maturity, shows the 
 need and effect of education. The power of educa- 
 tion is shown in that it hath power to give to chil- 
 dren resources that will endure as long as life 
 endures, habits that time will ameliorate but not 
 destroy, in that it renders sickness tolerable, solitude 
 pleasant, age venerable, life more dignified and use- 
 ful, and death less terrible. 
 
 Education may be right or wrong, good or bad. 
 Reason may grow strong in error and revel in falsi- 
 ties. The heart may grow in vice, and the passions 
 
EDUCATION. 183 
 
 expand in misrule. It has been wisely ordained that 
 light should have no color, water no taste, and air 
 no odor ; so knowledge should be equally pure and 
 without admixture. If it comes to us through the 
 medium of prejudice it will be discolored ; through 
 the channels of custom, it will be adulterated ; through 
 the Gothic walls of the college or of the cloister, it 
 will smell of the lamp. It is not what a man eats, 
 but what he digests that makes him strong ; not what 
 he gains, but what he saves that makes him rich; so 
 it is not what he reads or hears, but what he remem- 
 bers and applies that makes him learned. He who 
 knows men and how to deal with them, whose mind 
 by any means whatever has received that discipline 
 which gives to its action power and facility, has been 
 educated. 
 
 We can not be too careful to have our education 
 proceed in the right direction. It is almost as diffi- 
 cult to make a man unlearn his errors as to acquire 
 his knowledge. Error is more hopeless than igno- 
 rance, for error is always the more busy. Ignorance 
 is a blank sheet, on which we can write, but error is 
 a scribbled one, from which we must first erase. 
 Ignorance is content to stand still without advancing 
 towards wisdom, but error, more presumptuous, pro- 
 ceeds in the contrary direction. Ignorance has no 
 light to guide her, but error follows a false one. 
 The consequences are that error, when she retraces 
 her footsteps, has a long distance to go before she 
 is in as good condition for the acquiring of truth as 
 ignorance. 
 
184 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 A right conception of the value and power of 
 wisdom is a great incentive in stimulating us to 
 proceed in the work of educating ourselves. It is 
 knowledge that has converted the world from a 
 desert abode of savage men to the beautiful homes 
 of civilization. Human knowledge is permitted to 
 approximate, in some degree and on certain occa- 
 sions, with that of the Deity — its pure and primary 
 source. And this assimilation is never more con- 
 spicuous than when from evil it gathers its opposite, 
 good. What, at first sight, appears to be so insur- 
 mountable an obstacle to the intercourse of nations 
 as the ocean? But knowledge has converted it into 
 the best and most expeditious means by which they 
 may supply their mutual wants and carry on their 
 intimate communications. What so violent as steam, 
 or so destructive as fire? What so uncertain as the 
 winds, or so uncontrollable as the wave? Yet wis- 
 dom has rendered these unmanageable things instru- 
 mental and subsidiary to the necessities, the comforts, 
 and even the elegancies of life. What so hard, so 
 cold, so insensible as marble? Yet the sculptors can 
 warm it into life and bid it breathe an eternity of 
 love. What so variable as color, so swift as light, 
 or so empty as shade ? Yet the painter's pencil 
 can give these fleeting fancies both a body and a 
 soul ; can confer upon them an imperishable vigor, a 
 beauty which increases with age, and which will con- 
 tinue to captivate generations. In short, wisdom can 
 draw expedients from obstacles, invention from diffi- 
 culties, remedies from poisons. In her hands all 
 
EDUCATION. 185 
 
 things become beautiful by adaptation, subservient 
 by their use, and salutary by their application. 
 
 Since, then, intellectual attainments are so pre- 
 cious and wisdom so grand in its achievements, he 
 who neglects to improve his mental faculties, or fails 
 to train all his powers of mind and body, is not 
 walking in those paths that, under God's guidance, 
 conduce most surely to happiness and content. This 
 can be done by all, since education is within the 
 reach of all, even the most humble. The youth who 
 believes it is impossible for him to get an education 
 is deficient in courage and energy. Too many have 
 imbibed the idea that to obtain a sufficient education 
 to enable a man to appear advantageously upon the 
 theater of public life his boyhood and youth must be 
 spent within the walls of some classical seminary of 
 learning, that he may commence his career under the 
 banner of a collegiate diploma, and with it win the 
 first round in the ladder of fame. That a refined, 
 classical education is desirable all will admit; that it 
 is indispensably necessary does not follow. He who 
 has been incarcerated from his childhood to majority 
 within the limited circumference of his school and 
 boarding room, though he may have mastered all the 
 classics, is destitute of that knowledge of men and 
 things indispensably necessary to enable him to 
 act with vigor and dispatch either in public or pri- 
 vate life. 
 
 Classical lore and polite literature are very differ- 
 ent from that vast amount of practical intelligence, 
 fit for every-day use, that one must have to render 
 
186 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 his intercourse with society pleasing to himself or 
 agreeable to others. Let boys and girls be taught 
 first what is necessary to prepare them for the com- 
 mon duties of life ; then all that can be gained from 
 fields of classicl ore or works of polite erudition is of 
 the utmost value. In this enlightened age ignorance 
 is a voluntary misfortune, for all who will may drink 
 deeply at the fountain of knowledge. By the proper 
 improvement of time the mechanic's apprentice may 
 lay in a store of information that will enable him to 
 take a stand by the side of those persons who have 
 grown up in the full blaze of a collegiate education. 
 Learn thoroughly what you learn, be it ever so 
 little, and you may speak of it with confidence. A 
 few well-defined facts and ideas are worth a whole 
 library of uncertain knowledge. We are frequently 
 placed in position where we can learn with scarcely 
 an effort on our part, and yet we hang back because 
 it takes so long to acquire a mastery of any thing. 
 Let the end alone ! Begin at the beginning, and 
 though, after all, it prove but a mere smattering, you 
 are informed on one point more, and your life will 
 be happier for making the effort. By gaining an 
 education you shall have your reward in the rich 
 stores of knowledge you have thus collected, and 
 which shall ever be at your command, more valua- 
 ble than material treasures. While fleets may sink, 
 store-houses consume, and riches fade, the intellect- 
 ual stores you have thus gathered will be permanent 
 and enduring, as unfailing as the constant flow of 
 Niagara — a bank whose dividends are perpetual, 
 
MENTAL TRAINING. 187 
 
 whose wealth is undiminished, however frequent the 
 drafts upon it. How wise, then, to secure, as far as 
 possible, a complete and lasting education. 
 
 §|jgpHE mind has a certain vegetative power which 
 «db® can not be wholly idle. If it is not laid out and 
 W cultivated into a beautiful garden, it will shoot 
 up in weeds and flowers of a wild growth. 
 From this, then, is seen the necessity of careful men- 
 tal cultivation — a training of all the faculties in the 
 right direction. This should be the first great object 
 in any system of education, public or private. The 
 value of an education depends far less upon varied 
 and extensive acquirements than upon the cultivation 
 of just powers of thought and the general regulation 
 of the faculties of the understanding. That it is not 
 the amount of knowledge, but the capacity to apply 
 it, which promises success and usefulness in life, is a 
 truth which can not be too often inculcated by in- 
 structors and recollected by pupils. If youths are 
 taught how to think, they will soon learn what to 
 think. Exercise is not more necessary to a healthful 
 state of the body than is the employment of the va- 
 rious faculties of the mind to mental efficiency. The 
 practical sciences are as barren of useful products 
 as the speculative where facts only are the ob- 
 jects of knowledge, and the understanding is not 
 
188 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 habituated to a continual process of examination and 
 reflection. 
 
 It is the trained and disciplined intellect which 
 rules the world of literature, science, and art. It is 
 knowledge put in action by trained mental faculties 
 which is powerful. Knowledge merely gathered to- 
 gether, whether in books or in brains, is devoid of 
 power, unless quickened into life by the thoughts and 
 reflections of some practical worker. But when this 
 is supplied knowledge becomes an engine of power. 
 It is this which forms the philosopher's stone, the 
 true alchemy, that converts every thing it touches 
 into gold. It is the scepter that gives us our domin- 
 ion over nature ; the key that unlocks the storehouse 
 of creation, and opens to us the treasures of the uni- 
 verse. It is this which forms the difference between 
 savage and civilized nations, and marks the distinc- 
 tion between men as they appear in society. It is 
 this which has raised men from the humblest walks 
 of life to positions of influence and power. 
 
 The lack of mental training and discipline ex- 
 plains, in a large measure, why we so often meet 
 with men who are the possessors of vast stores of 
 erudition, and yet make a failure of every thing they 
 try. We shall at all times chance upon men of pro- 
 found and recondite acquirements, but whose qualifi- 
 cations, from a lack of practical application on their 
 owners' part, are as utterly useless to them as though 
 they had them not. A person of this class may be 
 compared to a fine chronometer which has no hands 
 to its dial ; both are constantly right without correct- 
 
MENTAL TRAINING. 189 
 
 ing any that are wrong, and may be carried around 
 the world without assisting one individual either in 
 making a discovery or taking an observation. Every 
 faculty of the mind is worthy of cultivation ; indeed, 
 all must be cultivated, if we would round and perfect 
 our mental powers as to secure therefrom the great- 
 est good. Memory must be ready with her stores 
 of useful knowledge, gathered from fields far and 
 near. She must be trained to classify and arrange 
 them, so as to hold them in her grasp. Observation 
 must be quick to perceive the apparently trivial 
 events which are constantly occurring, and diligent 
 to ascertain the cause. The judgment must pro- 
 nounce its decision without undue delay ; the will 
 move to execution in accordance with the fiat of an 
 enlightened understanding. 
 
 This work of mental training, apparently so vast, 
 is really so pleasant and easy that it sweetens every 
 day's life. There is no excuse for the youth who is 
 content to grow up to mature life and its duties with 
 a mind whose powers are untrained, and which has 
 not received the advantages of a practical education. 
 Some may think they are excused by poverty ; but 
 lack of means has not robbed them of a single intel- 
 lectual power. On the contrary, it sharpens them 
 all. Has poverty shut them out from nature, from 
 truth, or from God? Wealth can not convert a 
 dunce into a genius. Gold will not store a mind 
 with wisdom ; more likely it will fill it with folly. It 
 may decorate the body, but it can not adorn the 
 soul. No business is so urgent but that time may 
 
190 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 be spent in mental training. One can not well help 
 thinking and studying ; for the mind is ever active. 
 What is needful is to direct it to proper objects and 
 in proper channels, and it will cultivate itself. There 
 is nothing to prevent but the will. Whoever forms 
 a resolute determination to cultivate his mind will 
 find nothing in his way sufficient to stop him. If he 
 finds barriers they only strengthen him by overcom- 
 ing them. Whoever lives to thirty years of age 
 without cultivating his mind is guilty of a great 
 waste of time. If during that period he does not 
 form a habit of reading, of observation, and reflec- 
 tion, he will never form such a habit, but go through 
 the world none the wiser for all the wonders that are 
 spread around him. A small portion of that leisure 
 time which by too many is given to dissipation and 
 idleness, would enable any young man to acquire a 
 very general knowledge of men and things. One can 
 live a life-time and get no instruction ; but as soon as 
 he begins to look for wisdom it is given him. Even 
 in the pursuits of practical, every-day life numberless 
 instances are constantly arising to aid in mental train- 
 ing. There are few persons so engrossed by the 
 cares and labors of their calling that they can not 
 give thirty minutes a day to mental training ; and 
 even that time, wisely spent, will tell at the end of a 
 year. The affections, it is well known, sometimes 
 crowd years into moments ; and the intellect has 
 something of the same power. If you really prize 
 mental cultivation, or are deeply anxious to do any 
 good thing, you will find time or make time for it 
 
 
MENTAL TRAINING. 191 
 
 sooner or later, however, engrossed with other em- 
 ployments. A failure to accomplish it can only dem- 
 onstrate the feebleness of your will, not that you 
 lacked time for its execution. 
 
 It is impossible to overestimate the importance of 
 reading as a means of training the mental faculties. 
 It is by this means that you gather food for thoughts, 
 principles, and actions. If your books are wisely se- 
 lected and properly studied, they will enlighten your 
 minds, improve your hearts, and establish your char- 
 acter. To acquire useful information, to improve the 
 mind in knowledge and the heart in goodness, to 
 become qualified to perform with honor and useful- 
 ness the duties of life, and prepare for immortality 
 beyond the grave, are the great objects which ought 
 to be kept in view in reading. 
 
 There are four classes of readers. The first is 
 like the hour-glass, and, their reading being on the 
 sand, it runs in and runs out, and leaves no vestige 
 behind. A second is like a sponge, which imbibes 
 every thing, and returns it in the same state, only a 
 little dirtier. A third is like a jelly-bag, allowing all 
 that is pure to pass away, retaining only the refuse 
 and the dregs. The fourth is like the slaves in the 
 diamond-mines of Golconda, who, casting away all 
 that is worthless, obtain only pure gems. 
 
 We should read with discrimination. The world 
 is full of books, no small portion of which are either 
 worthless or decidedly hurtful in their tendency. 
 And as no man has time to read every thing, he 
 ought to make a selection of the ablest and best 
 
192 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 writers on the subjects which he wishes to investi- 
 gate, and dismiss wholly from his attention the en- 
 tire crowd of unworthy and useless ones. Always 
 read with your thoughts concentrated, and your mind 
 entirely engaged on the subject you are pursuing. 
 Any other course tends to form a habit of desultory, 
 indolent thought, and incapacitate the mind from con- 
 fining its attention to close and accurate investiga- 
 tion. One book read thoroughly and with careful 
 reflection will do more to improve the mind and 
 enrich the understanding than skimming over the 
 surface of a whole library. The more one reads in 
 a busy, superficial manner, the worse. It is like 
 loading the stomach with a great quantity of food, 
 which lies there undigested. It enfeebles the intel- 
 lect, and sheds darkness and confusion over all the 
 operations of the mind. The mind, like the body, is 
 strengthened by exercise, and the severer the exer- 
 cise the greater the increase of strength. One hour 
 of thorough, close application to study does more to 
 invigorate and improve the mind than a week spent 
 in the ordinary exercise of its powers. We should 
 read slowly, carefully, and with reflection. We some- 
 times rush over pages of valuable matter because at 
 a glance they seem to be dull, and we hurry along 
 to see how the story, if it be a story, is to end. 
 
 At every action and enterprise ask yourself this 
 question : What shall the consequences of this be to 
 me? Am I not likely to repent of it? Whatever 
 thou takest in hand, remember the end, and thou 
 shalt never do amiss. Take time to deliberate and 
 
MENTAL TRAINING. 193 
 
 advise, but lose no time in executing your resolu- 
 tion. To perceive accurately and to think correctly 
 is the aim of all mental training. Heart and con- 
 science are more than the mere intellect. Yet we 
 know not how much the clear, clean-cut thought, the 
 intellectual vision, sharp and true, may aid even 
 these. Undigested learning is as oppressive as un- 
 digested food ; and, as with the dyspeptic patient, the 
 appetite for food often grows with the inability to 
 digest it, so in the unthinking patient an overweening 
 desire to know often accompanies the inability to know 
 to any purpose. To learn merely for the sake of 
 learning is like eating merely for the taste of the food. 
 To learn in order to become wise makes the mind 
 active and powerful, like the body of one who is tem- 
 perate and judicious in meat and drink. 
 
 Thought is to the brain what gastric juice is to the 
 stomach — a solvent to reduce whatever is received to 
 a condition in which all that is wholesome and nutri- 
 tive may be appropriated, and that alone. Learning 
 is healthfully digested by the mind when it reflects 
 upon what is learned, classifies and arranges facts 
 and circumstances, considers the relations of one to 
 another, and places what is taken into the mind at 
 different times in relation to the same subjects under 
 their appropriate heads, so that the various stores are 
 not heterogeneously piled up, but laid away in order, 
 and may be examined with ease when wanted. This 
 is the perfection of mental training and discipline, — 
 memory well trained, judgment quick to act, and 
 attention sharp to observe. We invite and urge all 
 
 13 
 
194 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 to turn their attention to this subject as something 
 worthy of those endowed with reasoning powers. 
 It is not a wearying task, but one which repays for 
 its undertaking by making much more rich in its 
 joys and inspiring in its hopes all the after-life of 
 the man or woman who went forth bravely to the 
 work which heaven has decreed as the lot of all who 
 would enjoy the greatest good of life. 
 
 . c4>o . 
 
 glpilAN is a wonderful union of mind and body, 
 4Sw and to form a perfect being a high degree of 
 <y} cultivation is required for each component 
 part. Those who cultivate the mental to the 
 exclusion of the mere bodily, or at least carelessly 
 pass by its claims, are no less in error than those 
 who cultivate the bodily faculties to the exclusion of 
 the mental. The aim of all attempts at self-cultiva- 
 tion should be the highest and most appropriate de- 
 velopment of the entire being — physical, intellectual, 
 and moral. It comprehends the health of the body, 
 the expansion of the intellect, the purification of the 
 heart. It guards the health, because a feeble body 
 acts powerfully on the mind, and is a clog to its 
 progress. It cherishes the intellect, because it is the 
 glory of the human being. It trains the moral 
 nature, because if that is weak and misdirected a 
 blight falls upon the soul and a curse rests upon the 
 
SELF-CULTURE. 195 
 
 body. As each faculty reacts upon all the others, 
 true self-culture attends with a due proportion of care 
 to each. It strives to retain one power whose action 
 is too intense, and to stimulate another which is 
 torpid, until they act in delightful harmony with each 
 other, and the result is the healthful progress toward 
 the highest point of attainable good. 
 
 Self-culture includes a proper care of the health 
 of the body. To be careless of your health is to be 
 stunted in intellect and miserable in feelings. You 
 might as well expect to enjoy life in a dilapidated and 
 ruined habitation, which affords free admission to the 
 freezing blast and the pitiless rain, as to be happy in 
 a body ruined by self-indulgence. The body is the 
 home of the soul. Can its mysterious tenant find 
 rest and unmixed joy within its chambers if daily ex- 
 posed to sharp and shivering shocks through its 
 aching joints or quivering nerves ? How many bright 
 intellects have failed of making any impression upon 
 the world simply because they neglected the most 
 obvious of hygienic laws ! If God has bestowed upon 
 you the inestimable gift of good health and a good 
 constitution, it is your duty, as a rational creature, to 
 preserve it. To expect vigorous health and the en- 
 joyment which it brings, and at the same time live in 
 open defiance of the laws of health, is to expect what 
 can not take place. Not only is good health thus of 
 value and one of the most important ends of self- 
 cultivation, but we would impress on all the fact 
 that the body is just as important a factor as 
 the mind in the work of success, that it is just as 
 
196 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 worthy to be cultivated, so as to grow in strength 
 and beauty, and the development of all those faculties 
 which go to make a physically perfect man or woman. 
 
 It is a sad sight to see a brilliant mind that has 
 dragged down a strong body, because it has been so 
 imperious in its demands, leaving its companion to 
 suffer for lack of attention to some of its plainest 
 wants. It reminds one of a crazy building, tottering 
 under its own weight, yet full of the most costly ma- 
 chinery, which can be run, if at all, only with the 
 greatest caution, or the entire fabric will crumble to 
 ruins. The lesson can not be too soon learned that, 
 while the human body is most wonderfully complex 
 in its organization, still such is the perfection of all 
 nature's works that all that is demanded of us is 
 compliance with simple rules, to enable us to enjoy 
 health. That it is our duty as well as our privilege 
 to so train and cultivate the body that it will answer 
 readily all demands made upon it by an enlightened 
 mind, and will perform all its appropriate functions in 
 the great work of life. 
 
 Self-culture also implies suitable efforts to expand 
 and strengthen the intellect by reading, by reflection, 
 and by writing down your thoughts. The strength 
 and vigor given to the mind by self-culture is not 
 materially different from that expressed by the term 
 education in its broad and comprehensive meaning. 
 Intellect being the crowning glory and chief attribute 
 of man, there can be no nobler aim to set before 
 one's self than that of expanding and quickening all 
 of its powers. Rightly lived our every-day life and 
 
SELF-CULTURE. 197 
 
 actions conduce to this result. Our education is by 
 no means entirely the product of organized schools. 
 Our hired teachers and printed books are not all 
 that act on our powers to develop them. Life is 
 one grand school, and its every circumstance a 
 teacher. Society pours in its influence upon us like 
 the thousand streams that flood the ocean. 
 
 Scholastic men and women speak of book educa- 
 tion ; there is also a life education — that great, com- 
 mon arena where men and women do battle with the 
 forces around them. Our duty is so to guide and 
 control these influences as to be educated in the 
 right direction. We should recognize the fact that 
 we are educating all the time, and the great question 
 for us to settle is, "What manner of education are 
 we receiving?" Some are educated in vice, some in 
 folly, some in selfishness, some in deception, some in 
 goodness, some in truth. Every day gives us many 
 lessons in life. Every thought leaves its impression 
 on the mind. Every feeling weaves a garment for 
 the spirit. Every passion plows a furrow in the 
 soul. It is our duty as sentient, moral beings so to 
 guide and direct these thoughts, feelings, and pas- 
 sions that they shall educate us in the right direc- 
 tion. We are lax in duty to ourselves to let the 
 world educate us as it will, for we are running a 
 great risk to yield ourselves up to the circumstances 
 life has thrown about us, to plunge into the stream 
 of popular custom and allow ourselves to drift with 
 the current. 
 
 But aside from the practical education of every- 
 
198 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 day life we are to remember, in our efforts after 
 self-culture, that it is also obligatory upon us to seek 
 the discipline afforded by books and study. In the 
 pursuit of knowledge follow it wherever it is to be 
 found ; like fern, it is the product of all climates, 
 and, like air, its circulation is not restricted to any 
 particular class. Any and every legitimate means 
 of acquiring information is to be pursued, and all 
 the odds and bits of time pressed into use. Set a 
 high price upon your leisure moments. They are 
 sands of precious gold ; properly expended they will 
 procure for you a stock of great thoughts — thoughts 
 that will fill, stir, invigorate, and expand the soul. 
 As the magnificent river, rolling in the pride of its 
 mighty waters, owes its greatness to the hidden 
 springs of the mountain nook, so does the wide, 
 sweeping influence of distinguished men date its 
 origin from hours of privacy resolutely employed in 
 efforts after self-development. 
 
 We should esteem those moments best improved 
 which are employed in developing our own thoughts, 
 rather than in acquiring those of others, since in this 
 kind of intellectual exercise our powers are best 
 brought into action and disciplined for use. Knowl- 
 edge acquired by labor becomes a possession — a 
 property entirely our own. A greater vividness of 
 impression is secured, and facts thus acquired be- 
 come registered in the mind in a way that mere 
 imparted information fails of securing. A habit of 
 observation and reflection is well-nigh every thing. 
 He who has spent his whole life in traveling may 
 
SELF-CULTURE. 199 
 
 live and die a thorough novice in most of the im- 
 portant affairs of life, while, on the other hand, a 
 man may be confined to a narrow sphere and be 
 engrossed in the prosaic affairs of every-day life, 
 and yet have very correct ideas of the manners and 
 customs of other nations. He that studies only men 
 will get the body of knowledge without the soul ; he 
 that studies only books, the soul without the body. 
 He that to what he sees adds observation, and to 
 what he reads, reflection, is in the right road to 
 knowledge, provided that in scrutinizing the hearts 
 of others he neglects not his own. Be not dismayed 
 at doubts, for remember that doubt is the vestibule 
 through which all must pass before they can enter 
 into the temple of wisdom ; therefore, when we are 
 in doubt and puzzle out the truth by our own exer- 
 tions, we have gained a something which will stay by 
 us and serve us again. But if to avoid the trouble 
 of a search we avail ourselves of the superior infor- 
 mation of a friend, such knowledge will not remain 
 with us; we have borrowed it and not bought it. 
 
 But man possesses something more than a mere 
 body and intellect; he is the possessor of moral fac- 
 ulties as well. A true self-culture will be none the 
 less careful to have the actions of these refined and 
 pure than it is to possess physical health on the one 
 hand and mental vigor on the other. Indeed, since 
 your happiness depends upon their healthful condi- 
 tion more than upon the state of your body and in- 
 tellect, your first care should be devoted to giving 
 careful attention to your moral nature. With disor- 
 
200 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 dered moral faculties you will be as a ship without 
 a helm, dashed on bars and rocks at the will of winds 
 and waves. It is the vice of the age to substitute 
 learning for wisdom, to educate the head, and to for- 
 get that there is a more important education neces- 
 sary for the heart. Let the heart be opened and a 
 thousand virtues rush in. There is dew in one flower 
 and not in another, because one opens its cup and 
 takes it in, while the other closes itself and the drop 
 runs off. God rains his goodness and mercy as wide- 
 spread as the dew, and if we lack them it is because 
 we know not how to open our hearts to receive them. 
 No man can tell whether he is rich or poor by turn- 
 ing to his ledger. It is the heart that makes a man 
 rich. He is rich or poor according to what he is, 
 and not what he has. Cultivate your moral nature, 
 then, as well as bodily strength and mental vigor. 
 The heart is the center of vitality in the physical 
 body ; so the moral senses seem to give vitality to 
 all the various faculties of the mind. If the moral 
 nature becomes stunted in its development the mind 
 is apt to become chaotic in its action. How often we 
 meet with examples of this character in the common 
 walks of life ! Many lose their balance of mind and 
 become wrecks from want of heart culture. Is the 
 head of more importance than the heart? It is true 
 that wealth is the child of the one, but it is equally 
 true that happiness is the offspring of the other. 
 
 Such, then, is an outline of the great problem of 
 self-culture. We can not escape its claims ; from the 
 time reason dawns until death closes the scene they 
 
LITERATURE. 201 
 
 are pressing upon you. Much of the happiness of 
 life, both here and hereafter, depends on how you 
 meet its demands. You can, if you but will it, grow 
 apace in all that is manly or womanly in life; or, by 
 neglecting the claims of your manifold nature, as 
 utterly fail of so doing as the stunted shrub fails of 
 being the stately tree with waving branches and lux- 
 uriant foliage. 
 
 Jl 
 
 |rn|HE influence of literature upon a country is 
 B g ^n well-nigh incalculable, The Druid warriors 
 were incited to deeds of desperate valor by 
 the songs of their bards ; and in modern times 
 victories are achieved by the writers of books no less 
 important than many won on tented fields. The lit- 
 erature of a nation molds the thoughts of a whole 
 people, guides their actions, and impresses its indel- 
 ible mark upon the lives and conduct of its citizens. 
 Who can estimate the effect of Voltaire's writings on 
 the French people ? The results for which many 
 philanthropists toiled in vain were achieved by the 
 works of Dickens. The power of books and litera- 
 ture is no less marked in the individual than in the 
 mass. To the weak, and to the strong in their times 
 of weakness, books are inspiring friends and teachers. 
 Against the feebleness of individual efforts they pro- 
 claim the victory of faith and patience, and against 
 
202 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 the uncertainties and discouragement of one day's 
 work they set forth the richer and more complete life 
 that results from perseverance in right actions. It 
 sets the mind more and more in harmony with the 
 noblest aims, and holds before it a crown of honor 
 and power. 
 
 There is a certain monotony in daily life, and 
 there are those whose aims are high, but who lack 
 the inherent strength to stand true to them amid 
 adverse influences, and so gradually drop out of the 
 ever-thinning ranks of those who would wrest from 
 Fame her richest trophies. They are conquered by 
 routine, and disheartened by the discipline and labor 
 that guard the prizes of life. Even to the resolute, 
 persevering ones there are hours of weakness and 
 weariness. To all such literature comes with its 
 helping hand in hours of discouragement. It revives 
 hope in the minds of those almost discouraged, and 
 brings the comforts of philosophy to the cast-down. 
 Books are a guide to youth and an inspiration for 
 age. They support us under solitude, and keep us 
 from becoming a burden to ourselves. They lessen 
 our cares, compose our passions, and lay our disap- 
 pointments asleep. When weary of the living, we 
 may, by their aid, repair to the dead, who have 
 nothing of peevishness, pride, or design in their con- 
 versation. 
 
 In books we live continually in the decisive mo- 
 ments of history, and in the deepest experience of 
 individual lives. The flowers which we cull painfully 
 and at long intervals in our personal history blossom 
 
LITERATURE. 203 
 
 iii profusion here, and the air is full of fragrance 
 which touches our own life only in its happier times. 
 In our libraries we meet great minds on an equality, 
 and feel at ease with them. We come to know them 
 better, perhaps, than those who bear their names 
 and sit at their tables. The reserve that makes so 
 many fine natures difficult of access is here entirely 
 lost. No carelessness of manner, no poverty of 
 speech or unfortunate personal peculiarity, mars the 
 intercourse of author and reader. It is a relation in 
 which the exchange of thought is undisturbed by 
 outward conditions. We lose our narrow selves in 
 the broader life that is open to us. We forget the 
 hindrance and limitation of our own work in the full 
 comprehension of that stronger life that can not be 
 bound nor confined, but grows in all soils, and climbs 
 heavenward under every sky. 
 
 Literature is the soul of action, the only sensible 
 articulate voice of the accomplished facts of the past. 
 The men of antiquity are dead ; their cities are 
 ruins ; their temples are dust ; their fleets and ar- 
 mies have disappeared ; yet all these exist in magic 
 preservation in the literature which they have be- 
 queathed to us, and their manners and their deeds 
 are as familiar to us as the events of yesterday. 
 Papers and books are really the teachers, guides, 
 and lawgivers of the world to-day. Their influence 
 is very much like that of a companion to whom we 
 are attached. Hence it is of more consequence to 
 know what class to avoid than what to choose ; for 
 good books are as scarce as good companions, and 
 
204 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 in both instances all we can learn from bad ones is 
 that so much time has been worse than thrown away. 
 
 We should choose our books as we do our 
 friends, for their sterling and intrinsic merit, not for 
 the accidental circumstances in their favor. For, 
 with books as with men, it seldom happens that their 
 performances are fully equal to their pretensions, nor 
 their capital to their credit. As we should always 
 seek the companionship of the best class of people, 
 so we should always seek the companionship of the 
 best books. He that will have no books but such 
 as are scarce evinces about as correct a taste in lit- 
 erature as he would do in friendship who should have 
 no friends but those whom the rest of the world have 
 discarded. Some books we should make our con- 
 stant companions and associates ; others we should 
 receive only as occasional acquaintances and visitors. 
 Some we should take with us wherever we go ; oth- 
 ers we should leave behind us forever. Some, of 
 gilded outsides, are full of depravity, and we should 
 shun them as we would the actual vices which they 
 represent. Some books we should keep in our hands 
 and lay on our hearts, while the best we could dis- 
 pose of others would be to throw them in the fire. 
 
 You may judge a man more truly by the books 
 and papers that he reads than by the company which 
 he keeps, for his associates are in a measure imposed 
 upon him ; but his reading is the result of choice ; 
 and the man who chooses a certain class of books and 
 papers unconsciously becomes more colored in their 
 views, more rooted in their opinions, and the mind 
 
LITERATURE. 205 
 
 becomes trained to their way of thinking. All the 
 life and feeling of a young girl fascinated by some 
 glowing love romance is colored and shaped by the 
 page she reads. If it is false and weak and foolish, 
 she is false and weak and foolish too ; but if it is 
 true and tender and inspiring, then something of its 
 truth and tenderness and inspiration will grow into 
 her soul, and will become a part of her very self. 
 The boy who reads of deeds of manliness, of bravery 
 and noble doing, feels the spirit of emulation grow 
 within him, and the seed is planted which will bring 
 forth fruit of heroic endeavor and exalted life. 
 
 In literature our tastes will be discovered by what 
 we give, our judgment by that which we withhold. 
 That writer does the most who gives his readers the 
 most knowledge and takes from them the least time, 
 for that period of existence is alone deserving the 
 name of life which is rationally employed. Those 
 books are most profitable to read which make the 
 readers think most. Diminutive books, like diminu- 
 tive men and women, may be of greater value than 
 they seem to be ; but great tomes are greatly 
 dreaded. It is a saying that " books file away the 
 mind." Much reading is certainly not profitable 
 without much meditation, and many vigorous and 
 profound thinkers have read comparatively little, 
 though it must be admitted most great minds have 
 been very devout and ardent readers. There is 
 scarcely any thing that is not to be found in books, 
 but it does not follow that we shall find every thing 
 in them unless we handle them with great care. 
 
206 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 A beautiful literature springs from the depths 
 and fullness of intellectual and moral life, from an 
 energy of thought and feeling. It deals with ques- 
 tions of life in a plain, practical manner. It holds up 
 the past for your inspection. It brings to light the 
 secrets of nature. It enables us to discover the in- 
 finity of things, the immensity of nature, the wonders 
 of the heavens, the earth, and the seas. Works of 
 fiction are the ornamental parts of literature and learn- 
 ing. They are agreeable embellishments of the edi- 
 fice, but poor foundations for it ,to rest upon. The 
 literature of the day is largely composed of newspapers 
 and periodicals. No one can too highly appreciate 
 the magic power of the press or too highly depreciate 
 its abuse. Newspapers have become the great high- 
 way of that intelligence which exerts a controlling 
 power over a nation, catering the every-day food of 
 the mind. Show us an intelligent family of boys and 
 girls, and we will show' you a family where newspapers 
 and periodicals are plenty. Nobody who has been 
 without these private tutors can know their educating 
 power for good or for evil. Think of the innumerable 
 topics of discussion which they suggest at the table ; 
 the important public measures with which the children 
 thus early become acquainted ; of the great philan- 
 thropic questions to which, unconsciously perhaps, 
 their attention is called, and the general spirit of in- 
 telligence which is evoked by these quiet visitors. 
 This vast world moves along lines of thought and 
 sentiment and principles, and the press gives to these 
 wings to fly and tongues to speak. 
 
MENTAL POWER. 207 
 
 "My mind to me a kingdom is; 
 Such perfect joy therein I find 
 As far exceeds all earthly bliss. 
 Though much I want that most would have, 
 Yet still my mind forbids to crave." 
 
 — Sir Edmund Dyer. 
 
 -•->•■- 
 
 ffjIpHE triumph of cultivated intellect over the forces 
 ^wf* of nature is indeed a wonderful subject for con- 
 fit templation. The most deadly poisons are made 
 to conduce to human health and welfare. Elec- 
 tricity does the writing and talking, and annihilates 
 space. Steam and iron are made to do the work of 
 nerves and muscles, and lay the four corners of the 
 world under contribution for our benefit. In view of 
 these and many similar facts, how full of meaning 
 becomes the old saying, "Knowledge is power!" 
 Reason, like the magnetic influence imparted to iron, 
 may be said to give to matter properties and powers 
 which it did not possess before ; but, without extend- 
 ing its bulk, augmenting its weight, or altering its 
 organization, it is visible only by its effects and per- 
 ceptible only by its operations. 
 
 Unlike those of the warriors, the triumphs of in- 
 tellect derive all their luster, not from the evil they 
 have produced, but from the good. Her successes 
 and her conquests are the common property of the 
 world, and succeeding ages will be the watchful guardi- 
 ans of the rich legacies she bequeathes. The trophies 
 and titles of the conqueror are on the quick march 
 
208 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 to oblivion, and amid that desolation where they were 
 planted will decay. As the mind must govern the 
 hand, so in every society the man of intelligence 
 must direct and govern the man of ignorance. There 
 is no exception to this law. It is the natural sequence 
 of the dominion of mind over matter — a dominion so 
 strong that for a time it can make flesh and nerves 
 impregnable, and string the sinews like steel, so that 
 the weak become strong. Some men of a secluded 
 and studious life have sent forth from their closet or 
 cloister rays of intellectual light that have agitated 
 courts and revolutionized kingdoms, as the moon, 
 that far removed from the ocean, and shining upon 
 it with a serene and sober light, is the chief cause 
 of all those ebbings and flowings which incessantly 
 disturb that world of waters. 
 
 The triumph of mind is shown in various ways. 
 It enables us to surmount difficulties with facility. 
 Like imprisoned steam, the more it is* pressed, the 
 more it rises to resist the pressure. The more we 
 are obliged to do, the more we are able to accom- 
 plish. Perhaps in no other respect is the power of 
 mind more signally shown than when it opens to 
 our view avenues of pleasure before unthought of. 
 Happiness is the great aim of life. In one form or 
 another we are all striving for it. There are no 
 pleasures so pure as mental pleasures. We never 
 tire of them. A lofty mind always thinks loftily. It 
 easily creates vivid, agreeable, and natural fancies, 
 places them in their best light, clothes them with all 
 appropriate adornments, studies others' tastes, and 
 
MENTAL POWER. 209 
 
 clears away from its own thoughts all that is useless 
 and disagreeable. Mental force or power is not the 
 inheritance of birth, nor the result of a few years' 
 spasmodic study ; it is only acquired as the result of 
 long and patient exertion. There is no age at which 
 it can not be increased. There is absolutely no 
 branch of literature which, when properly digested 
 and stowed away in the mind, will not show its effect 
 in after life by increased vigor in the whole mind. 
 Those intellectually strong men and women who 
 have left their influence on the world's history are 
 almost without exception found to be those who have 
 possessed broad and deep acquirements ; who have 
 permitted no opportunity for obtaining information to 
 pass unimproved ; who have been content for years 
 to store away knowledge, confident that in the fullness 
 of time they would reap the reward. 
 
 If any one would be the possessor of mental 
 power he must be willing to do his duty in obtaining 
 it. There is a tendency to make the acquisition of 
 knowledge, at the present day, as easy as possible. 
 The end proposed is good, but the means employed 
 are of doubtful utility. Instead of toiling painfully 
 on foot up the rugged steeps of learning the student 
 of to-day flies along a railway track, finding every 
 cliff cut through and every valley bridged. In this 
 world nothing of value is to be obtained without la- 
 bor. So there are some who will question the value of 
 that education which is not born of patient persever- 
 ance and hard work. As in the exercises of the gym- 
 nasium the value consists in the exertions required to 
 
210 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 perform them, so that knowledge and mental power 
 acquired by arduous exertion is of the most lasting 
 and real value. Let patient toilers find a lesson of 
 encouragement in this. What you thus painfully ac- 
 quire will prove of lasting benefit to you. 
 
 Mental power is seen in its best form only when 
 all of the mental faculties have been properly drilled 
 and disciplined. The mind can not grow to its full 
 stature, nor be rounded into just proportions, nor ac- 
 quire that blended litheness, toughness, and elasticity 
 which it needs, if fed on one aliment. There is no 
 profession or calling which, if too exclusively followed, 
 will not warp and contract the mind. Just as if, in 
 the body, a person resolves to be a rower, and only 
 a rower, the chances are that he will have, indeed, 
 strong arms, but weak legs, and eyes blinded by the 
 glare of water. Or, if he desires to become an ath- 
 lete, he may be all muscles, with few brains. So, in 
 the mind, if he exercises but one set of faculties and 
 neglects the rest, he may become a subtle theolo- 
 gian or a sharp lawyer, a keen man of business, or 
 a practical mechanic, and though the possessor of 
 power it is not power in its highest and best form. 
 
 But for those who are anxious to obtain mental 
 power, and for that purpose devote the years of a life- 
 time to patient study and reflection, the rewards it 
 offers are full compensation for all the hours of weary, 
 self-denying labor. Not only does it afford the best 
 assurance of success in life's battles and point out to 
 its possessor means of happiness denied to others, 
 but it is so peculiarly the highest form of power to 
 
CHOICE OF COMPANIONS. 211 
 
 which men can aspire that it commands the homage 
 of all, and reposes as a j*9wel in the crown of the 
 true man or woman. 
 
 IBpHE chameleon changes its color to agree with 
 e ^k° that of surrounding objects. We all of us by 
 W nature possess this quality to such a degree 
 that our character, habits, and principles take 
 their form and color from those of our intimate as- 
 sociates. Association with persons wiser, better, and 
 more experienced than ourselves is always more or 
 less inspiring and invigorating. They enhance our 
 knowledge of life. We correct our estimate by theirs, 
 and become partners in their wisdom. We enlarge 
 our field of observation through their eyes, profit by 
 their experience, and learn not only by what they 
 have enjoyed, but — which is still more instructive — 
 from what they have suffered. If they are stronger 
 than ourselves, we become participators in their 
 strength. Hence companionship with the wise and 
 energetic never fails to have a most valuable influence 
 on the formation of character — increasing our re- 
 sources, strengthening our resolves, elevating our 
 aims, and enabling us to exercise greater dexterity 
 and ability in our own affairs, as well as more effect- 
 ive helpfulness in those of others. 
 
 Young men are in general but little aware how 
 
212 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 much their reputation is affected in the view of the 
 public by the company they keep. The character of 
 their associates is soon regarded as their own. If 
 they seek the society of the worthy and the respect- 
 able, it elevates them in the public estimation, as it is 
 an evidence that they respect themselves, and are de- 
 sirous to secure the respect of others. On the con- 
 trary, intimacy with persons of bad character always 
 sinks a young man in the eyes of the public. While 
 he, in intercourse with such persons, thinks but little 
 of the consequences, others are making their remarks. 
 They learn what his taste is, what sort of company 
 he prefers, and predict, on no doubtful ground, what 
 will be the result to his own principles and character. 
 It is they only who are elevated in mind, character, 
 and position, who can lift us up ; while the ignoble, 
 degraded, and debased only drag us down. We may 
 be deprived of the advantages of better and superior 
 associations at some time or another, but, unless we 
 seek for them, we shall not profit by them, nor be 
 acknowledged to be worthy of them. 
 
 No man. of position can allow himself to associate, 
 without prejudice, with the profane, the Sabbath- 
 breaking, the drunken, and the licentious ; for he 
 lowers himself, without elevating them. The sweep 
 is not made the less black by rubbing against the 
 well-dressed and the clean, while they are inevitably 
 defiled. Keep company with persons rather above 
 than below yourself; for gold in the same pocket 
 with silver loseth both of its weight and color. Noth- 
 ing elevates us so much as the presence of a spirit 
 
CHOICE OF COMPANIONS. 213 
 
 similar, yet superior, to our own. What is compan- 
 ionship where nothing that improves the intellect is 
 communicated, and where the larger heart contracts 
 itself to the mold and dimensions of the smaller? 
 In all society it is advisable to associate, if possible, 
 with the highest ; not that the highest are always the 
 best, but because, if disgusted there, you can at any 
 time descend ; but if we begin at the lowest, to ascend 
 is impossible. It should be the aim of the young man 
 to seek the society of the wise, the intelligent, and 
 the good. It is always safe to be found in the society 
 of those who, with a good heart, combine intelligence 
 and an ability to impart information. If you wish to 
 be respected, if you desire happiness and not misery, 
 associate only with the intelligent and good. Once 
 habituate yourself to a virtuous course, once secure 
 a love of good society, and no punishment would be 
 greater than, by accident, to be obliged to associate, 
 even for a short time, with the low and vulgar. 
 
 He that sinks into familiarity with persons much 
 below his own level will be constantly weighed down 
 by his base connections, and, though he may easily 
 sink lower, he will find it hard to rise again. Better 
 be alone than in bad company. "Evil communica- 
 tions corrupt good manners." Ill qualities are catch- 
 ing as well as diseases, and the mind is at least as 
 much, if not a great deal more, liable to infections 
 than the body. Go with mean people and you think 
 life is mean. Society is the atmosphere of souls, and 
 we necessarily imbibe something which is either in- 
 fectious or salubrious. The society of virtuous per- 
 
214 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 sons is enjoyed beyond their company, and vice 
 carries a sting even into solitude. The society you 
 keep is both the indicator and former of your char- 
 acter. In company, when the pores of. the mind are 
 all opened, there requires more guard than usual, be- 
 cause the mind is then passive. In vicious company 
 you will feel your reverence for the dictates of con- 
 science wear off. The name at which angels bow 
 and devils tremble you will hear contemned and 
 abused. The Bible will supply materials for unmean- 
 ing jests or impious buffoonery. The consequences 
 will be a practical deviation into vice — the principle 
 will become sapped and the fences of conscience 
 broken down. 
 
 It is not alone the low and dissipated, the vulgar 
 and profane, from whose example and society you 
 are in danger. These persons of reputation will 
 despise and shun. But there are persons of ap- 
 parently decent morals, of polished manners and 
 interesting talents, but who, at the same time, are 
 unprincipled and wicked, who make light of sacred 
 things, scoff at religion, and deride the suggestions 
 and scruples of a tender conscience as superstition, — 
 these are the persons whose society and influence are 
 most to be feared. Their breath is pollution; their 
 embrace, death. Unhappily there are many of this 
 description. They mark out their unwary victims ; 
 they gradually draw them into their toils ; they strike 
 the deadly fang, infuse the poison, and exult to see 
 youthful virtue and parental hope wither and expire 
 under their .ruffian example. Many a young man 
 
CHOICE OF COMPANIONS. 215 
 
 has thus been led on by his elders in iniquity till he 
 has been initiated into all the mysteries of debauch- 
 ery and crime, and ended his days a poor, outcast 
 wretch. 
 
 Live with the culpable and you will be apt to die 
 with the criminal. Bad company is like a nail driven 
 into a post, which, after the first or second blow, 
 may be drawn out with little difficulty, but, being 
 driven in to the head, it can only be withdrawn by 
 the destruction of the wood. Be you ever so pure- 
 minded yourself you can not associate with bad com- 
 panions without falling into bad odor. Evil company 
 is like tobacco smoke — you can not be long in its 
 presence without carrying away a taint of it. " Let 
 no man deceive himself," says Petrarch, "by thinking 
 that the contagions of the soul are less than those 
 of the body. They are yet greater ; they sink deeper 
 and come on more unsuspectedly." From impure air 
 we take diseases ; from bad company, vice and imper- 
 fections. Avoid, as far as you can, the company of 
 all vicious persons whatsoever, for no vice is alone, 
 and all are infectious. 
 
 Good company not only improves our manners, 
 but also our minds, and intelligent associates will be- 
 come a source of enjoyment as well as of edification. 
 Good company is that which is composed of intelli- 
 gent and well-bred persons, whose language is chaste 
 and good, whose sentiments are pure and edifying, 
 whose deportment is such as pure and well-regulated 
 education and correct morals dictate, and whose con- 
 duct is directed and restrained by the pure precepts 
 
216 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 of religion. When we have the advantages of such 
 company it should then be the object of our zeal to 
 imitate their real excellencies, copy their politeness, 
 their carriage, their address, and the easy, well-bred 
 turn of their conversation; but we should remember 
 that, let them shine ever so bright, their vices are 
 so many blemishes upon their character which we 
 should no more think of endeavoring to imitate than 
 we should to make artificial warts upon our faces 
 because some distinguished person happened to have 
 one there by nature. 
 
 Water will seek its level. So do the various 
 elements of society. Tell us whom you prefer as 
 companions and we can tell who you are like. Do 
 you love the society of the vulgar? Then you are 
 already debased in your sentiments. Do you seek 
 to be with the profane? In your heart you are 
 like them. Are jesters and buffoons your choice 
 companions? He who loves to laugh at folly is him- 
 self a fool. Do you love and seek the society of 
 the wise and good? Is this your habit? Had you 
 rather take the lowest seat among these than the 
 highest seat with others ? Then you have already 
 learned to be good. You may not make very rapid 
 progress, but even a good beginning is not to be 
 despised. Hold on your way, and seek to be the 
 companion of those that fear God. So shall you be 
 wise for yourself and wise for eternity. 
 
T V | | U 
 
FBIENDS. 217 
 
 " There are a thousand nameless ties, 
 
 Which only such as feel them know, 
 Of kindred thoughts, deep sympathies, 
 
 And untold fancy spells, which throw 
 O'er ardent minds and faithful hearts 
 
 A chain whose charmed links so blend 
 That the bright circlet but imparts 
 
 Its force in these fond words — 'My Friend /' " 
 
 FRIENDSHIP is the sweetest and most satisfac- 
 tory connection in life. It has notable effect 
 fj? upon all states and conditions. It relieves our 
 cares, raises our hopes, and abates our fears. 
 A friend who relates his successes talks himself into 
 a new pleasure, and by opening his misfortunes leaves 
 a part of them behind him. Friendship improves 
 happiness and abates misery, by doubling our joys 
 and dividing our griefs. Charity is friendship in com- 
 mon, and friendship is charity inclosed. It is a sweet 
 attraction of the heart towards the merit we esteem 
 or the perfection we admire, and produces a mutual 
 inclination between two or more persons to promote 
 each others' interests, knowledge, virtue, and hap- 
 piness. 
 
 The language of friendship is as varied as the 
 wants and weaknesses of humanity. To the timid 
 and cautious it speaks words of encouragement. To 
 the weak it is ready to extend a helping hand. To 
 the bold and venturesome it whispers words of caution. 
 It is ready to sympathize with the sorrowing one, and 
 
218 G OLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 to rejoice with those of good cheer. Friendship is 
 not confined to any particular class of society or any 
 particular geographical locality. No surveyed chart, 
 no natural boundary line, no rugged mountain or 
 steep declining vale puts a limit to its growth. 
 Wherever it is watered with the dews of kindness 
 and affection, there you may be sure to find it. Allied 
 in closest companionship with its twin sister, Charity, 
 it enters the abode of sorrow and wretchedness, and 
 causes happiness and peace. Its influence dispels 
 every poisoned thought of envy, and spreads abroad 
 in the mind a contentment which all the powers of 
 the mind could not otherwise bestow. True friend- 
 ship will bloom only in the soil of a noble and self- 
 sacrificing heart. There it enjoys perpetual Summer, 
 diffusing a sweet atmosphere of love, peace, and joy 
 to all around. 
 
 No man can go very far with strength and cour- 
 age, if he goes alone through the weary struggles of 
 life. We are made to be happier and better by each 
 other's notice and appreciation, and the hearts that 
 are debarred from those influences invariably contract 
 and harden. Here and there we find persons who, 
 from 'pride or singularity of disposition, affect to be 
 altogether independent of the notice or regard of 
 their fellow-beings ; but never yet was there consti- 
 tuted a human heart that did not at some time, in 
 some tender and yearning hour, long for the sym- 
 pathy of other hearts. Instead of striving to conceal 
 this feeling, it should be regarded as ope possessing 
 true nobility. True friendship can only be molded 
 
FRIENDS. 219 
 
 by the experience of time. The attractive face, the 
 winning tongue, or the strong need of some passer- 
 by, is not the permanent test of the union of hearts. 
 We want a more substantial proof than any of these. 
 A thousand transitory friends meet us along the 
 crowded thoroughfares of life ; but when we come to 
 try their durability in the sieve of experience, alas, 
 how many fall through ! There have been times in 
 the life of every man when he has been willing to 
 stake reputation, credit, all, on the true friendship 
 of some companion ; but he turns to find his idol 
 clay, the gold but dross. Few persons are so fortu- 
 nate as to secure in the course of life the happiness 
 and advantages of one efficient and devoted friend. 
 It is all that many aim at, seek, and ask to have, and 
 is worth a whole caravan of those lukewarm and 
 treacherous souls who, indeed, profess to be attached 
 to us, but whose affection is so uncertain and un- 
 stable that we fear to put it to the test of trial lest 
 we lose it forever. 
 
 Concerning the one you call your friend, tell us, 
 will he weep with you in your hours of distress? 
 Will he faithfully reprove you to your face for actions 
 for which others are ridiculing and censuring you be- 
 hind your back ? Will he dare to stand forth in your 
 defense when detraction is secretly aiming its weapon 
 at your reputation ? Will he acknowledge you with 
 the same cordiality and behave to you with the same 
 friendly attention in the company of your superiors 
 in rank and fortune as when the claims of pride do 
 not interfere with those of friendship ? If misfortune 
 
220 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 and loss should oblige you to retire into a walk of 
 life in which you can not appear with the same liber- 
 ality as formerly, will he still think himself happy in 
 your society, and instead of withdrawing himself from 
 an unprofitable connection, take pleasure in profess- 
 ing himself your friend, and cheerfully assist you to 
 support the burden of your afflictions ? When sick- 
 ness shall call you to retire from the busy world, will 
 he follow you to your gloomy retreat, listen with at- 
 tention to your tale of suffering, and administer the 
 balm of consolation to your fainting spirit ? And, 
 lastly, when death shall burst asunder every earthly 
 tie, will he shed a tear upon your grave, and lodge 
 the dear remembrance of your mutual friendship in 
 his heart ? If so, then grapple him to your heart 
 with hooks of steel ; and you shall know the privilege 
 of having one true friend. 
 
 Friendship is a vase which, when it is flawed by 
 violence or accident, may as well be broken at once ; 
 it never can be trusted after. The more graceful 
 and ornamental it was, the more clearly do we dis- 
 cern the hopelessness of restoring it to its former 
 state. Coarse stones, if they are fractured, may be 
 cemented again ; precious ones never. It is a great 
 thing to cover the blemishes and to excuse the faults of 
 a friend ; to draw a curtain before his stains ; to bury 
 his weakness in silence, but to proclaim his virtues 
 upon the housetop. Prosperity is no just scale; 
 adversity is the only true balance to weigh friends in. 
 True friendship must withstand the shocks of ad- 
 versity before it is entitled to the name, since friend- 
 
FRIENDS. 221 
 
 ships which are born in adversity are more firm and 
 lasting than those formed in happiness, as iron is 
 more strongly united the fiercer the flames. One 
 has never the least difficulty in finding a devoted 
 friend except when he needs one. Real friends are 
 wont to visit us in prosperity only when invited, but 
 in adversity they come of their own accord. A friend 
 is not known in prosperity, but can not be hidden in 
 adversity. If we lack the sagacity to discriminate 
 wisely between our acquaintances and our friends, 
 misfortune will readily do it for us. Prosperity gains 
 friends, and adversity tries them. False friends are 
 like our shadows — keeping close to us while we walk 
 in the sunshine, but leaving us the instant we cross 
 into the shade. False friendship, like the ivy, de- 
 cays and ruins the walls it embraces ; but true friend- 
 ship gives new life and animation to the object it 
 supports. 
 
 The hardest trials of those who fall from affluence 
 to poverty and obscurity is the discovery that the 
 attachment of so many in whom they confided was a 
 pretense, a mask to gain their own ends, or was a 
 miserable shallowness. Sometimes, doubtless, it is 
 with regret that these frivolous followers of the world 
 desert those upon whom they have fawned ; but they 
 soon forget them. Flies leave the kitchen when the 
 dishes are empty. The parasites that cluster about 
 the favorites of fortune to gather his gifts and climb 
 by his aid, linger with the sunshine, but scatter at the 
 approach of a storm, as the leaves cling to a tree in 
 Summer weather, but drop off at the breath of Win- 
 
222 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 ter. Like ravens settled down for a banquet and 
 suddenly scared away by a noise, how quickly at the 
 first sound of calamity the superficial friends are up 
 and away. Cling to your friends after having chosen 
 them with proper caution. If they reprove you, 
 thank them; if they grieve you, forgive them; if 
 circumstances have torn them from you, circumstances 
 may change and make them yours again. Be very 
 slow to give up an old and tried friend. A true friend 
 is such a rare thing to have that you are blessed 
 beyond the majority of men if you possess but one 
 such. The first law of friendship is sincerity, and he 
 who violates this law will soon find himself destitute 
 of that which he sought. 
 
 The death of a friendship is always a tragical 
 affair. Sometimes it cools from day to day, warm 
 confidence gradually giving place to cold civility, and 
 these in turn swiftly becoming icy husks of neglect 
 and repugnance. Sometimes its remembrances touch 
 us with a pang, or we stand at its grave sobbing, 
 wounded with a grief whose balsam never grew. 
 The hardest draught in the cup of life is wrung 
 from betrayed affection, when the guiding light of 
 friendship is quenched in deception, and the gloom 
 that surrounds our path grows palpable. Let one 
 find cold repulse or mocking treachery where he ex- 
 pected the greeting of friendship, and it is not strange 
 that he feels crushed with the discovery. 
 
 Old friends ! What a multitude of deep and 
 varied emotions are called up from the soul by the 
 utterance of these two words ! What thronging 
 
"POWER OF CUSTOM." 223 
 
 memories of other days crowd the brain when they 
 are spoken ! Oh, there is magic in their sound, and 
 the spell it evokes is both sad and pleasing. When 
 reverie brings before us in quick succession the 
 scenes of by-gone years, how do the features of 
 olden friends, dim and shadowy as the grave in 
 which many of them are laid, flit before us ! How 
 they carry us to other scenes and other places ! 
 The thoughts which fill the mind when thus musing 
 on the past are always of a chastened kind. In the 
 scenes of the past we behold a type of the future. 
 The fate of our friends shadows forth our own, and 
 we are indeed dull if we fail to arise from fancied 
 communication with old friends wiser and better men 
 and women. 
 
 M|HERE are many who find themselves in the 
 *|8p toils of an evil custom who would most willingly 
 f$ give money and time to be free from its con- 
 trol. Montaigne says, •• Custom is a violent 
 and treacherous school-mistress. She, by little and 
 little, slyly and unperceivedly slips in the foot of her 
 authority ; but having by this gentle and humble be- 
 ginning, with the benefit of time, fixed and estab- 
 lished it, she then unmasks a furious and tyrannic 
 countenance, against which we have no more the 
 courage or. the power to lift up our eyes." Custom 
 is the law of one class of people and fashion of an- 
 
224 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 other ; but the two parties often clash, for precedence 
 is the legislator of the first and novelty of the second. 
 Custom, therefore, looks to things that are past, and 
 fashion to things that are present; but both are 
 somewhat purblind as to things that are to come. 
 Of the two, fashion imposes the heaviest burdens, for 
 she cheats her votaries of their time, their fortune, 
 and their comforts, and she repays them only with 
 the celebrity of being ridiculed and despised — a very 
 paradoxical mode of payment, yet always most thank- 
 fully received. 
 
 It is surprising to what an extent our likes 
 and dislikes are creatures of custom. Our modes 
 of belief, thoughts, and opinions are molded and 
 shaped by what has been the prevailing mode of 
 thinking heretofore. Though we are, indeed, not 
 so given to the worship of past institutions as some 
 people, yet we all acknowledge the prevailing power 
 of custom, of personal habits, and of fashions. We 
 dare not stand alone in any matter of concern, but 
 wish to be in company of those similarly minded. 
 The law of opinion goes forth. We do not ask who 
 promulgates it, but fall into the ranks of its followers 
 and worshipers. We are whirled in the giddy ranks 
 and blinded by the dazzling lights. Novelty is the 
 show, conformity is the law — and life a trance, until 
 at last we awake from it to find that we have been 
 the victims of a fatal folly and a bewildering dream. 
 
 Habit is man's best friend or worst enemy. It 
 can exalt him to the highest pinnacle of virtue, honor, 
 or happiness, or sink him to the lowest depths of 
 
"POWER OF CUSTOM." 225 
 
 vice, shame, and misery. If we look back upon the 
 usual course of our feelings we shall find that we 
 are more influenced by the frequent recurrence of 
 objects than by their weight and importance, and 
 that habit has more force in forming our character 
 than our opinions. The mind naturally takes its tone 
 and complexion from what it habitually contemplates. 
 " Whatever may be the cause," says Lord Karnes, 
 ' 'it is an established fact that we are much influenced 
 by custom. It hath an effect upon our pleasures, 
 upon our actions, and even upon our thoughts and 
 sentiments." Habit makes no figure during the vivac- 
 ity of youth, in middle age it gains ground, and in 
 old age governs without control. In that period of 
 life, generally speaking, we eat at a certain hour, 
 take exercise at a certain time, all by the direction 
 of habit ; nay, a particular seat, table, and bed comes 
 to be essential, and a habit in any of these can not 
 be contradicted without uneasiness. Man, it has 
 been said, is a bundle of habits, and habit is a second 
 nature. Metastasio entertained so strong an opinion 
 as to the power of repetition in act and thought that 
 he said, f< All is habit in mankind, even virtue itself." 
 Beginning with single acts habit is formed slowly 
 at first, and it is not till its spider's thread is woven 
 in a thick cable that its existence is suspected. Then 
 it is found that beginning in cobwebs it ends in 
 chains. Gulliver was bound as fast by the Lillipu- 
 tians with multiplied threads as if they had used 
 ropes. "Like flakes of snow that fall unperceivedly 
 
 upon the earth," says Jeremy Bentham, "the seem- 
 
 15 
 
226 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 ingly unimportant events of life succeed one another. 
 As the snow gathers so are our habits formed ; no 
 single flake that is added to the pile produces a 
 sensible change; no single action creates, however 
 it may exhibit, a man's character. But as the tem- 
 pest hurls the avalanche down the mountain and 
 overwhelms the inhabitant and his habitation, so 
 passion, acting upon the elements of mischief which 
 pernicious habits have brought together by imper- 
 ceptible accumulation, may overthrow the edifice of 
 truth and virtue. 
 
 The force of habit renders pleasant many things 
 which at first were intensely disagreeable or even 
 painful. Walking upon the quarter-deck of a vessel, 
 though felt at first to be intolerably confined, be- 
 comes, by repetition, so agreeable to the sailor that, 
 in his walks on shore, he often hems himself within 
 the same bounds. Arctic explorers become so ac- 
 customed to the hardships incident to such a life 
 that they do not enjoy the comforts of home when 
 they return. So powerful is the effect of constant 
 repetition of action that men whose habits are fixed 
 may almost be said to have lost their free agency. 
 Their actions become of the nature of fate, and they 
 are so bound by the chains which they have woven 
 for themselves that they do that which they have 
 been accustomed to do even when they know it can 
 yield neither pleasure nor profit. 
 
 Those who are in the power of an evil habit must 
 conquer it as they can, and conquered it must be, or 
 neither wisdom nor happiness can be obtained ; but 
 
"POWER OF CUSTOM." 227 
 
 those who are not yet subject to their influence may, 
 by timely caution, preserve their freedom. They 
 may effectually resolve to escape the tyrant whom 
 they will vainly resolve to conquer. Be not slow in 
 the breaking of a sinful custom; a quick, courageous 
 resolution is better than a gradual deliberation; in 
 such a combat he is the bravest soldier who lays 
 about him without fear or wit. Wit pleads; fear 
 disheartens. He who would kill hydra had better 
 strike off one neck than five heads, — fell the tree 
 and the branches are soon cut off. Vicious habits 
 are so great a strain on human nature, said Cicero, 
 and so odious in themselves that every person actu- 
 ated by right reason would avoid them, though he 
 were sure they would always be concealed both from 
 God and man and had no future punishment entailed 
 on them. Vicious habits, when opposed, offer the 
 most vigorous resistance on the first attack ; at each 
 successive encounter this resistance grows weaker, 
 until, finally, it ceases altogether, and the victory is 
 achieved. 
 
 Such being the power of habit all can plainly see 
 the importance of forming habits of such a nature 
 that they shall constantly tend to increase our hap- 
 piness, and to render more sure and certain that 
 success the attaining of which is the object of all 
 our endeavors. We may form habits of honesty or 
 knavery, frugality or extravagance, of patience or 
 impatience, self-denial or self-indulgence. In short, 
 there is not a virtue nor a vice, not an act of body 
 nor of mind, to which we may not be chained by 
 
228 GOLDEN GE3IS OF LIFE. 
 
 this despotic power. It has been truly said that even 
 happiness may become habitual. One may acquire 
 the habit of looking upon the sunny side of things, 
 or of looking upon the gloomy side. He may ac- 
 custom himself by a happy alchemy to transmute 
 the darkest events into materials for hopes. Hume, 
 the historian, said that the habit of looking at the 
 bright side of things was better than an income of a 
 thousand pounds a year. 
 
 Habits which are to be commended are not to be 
 formed in a day, nor by a few faint resolutions, not 
 by accident, not by fits and starts — being one mo- 
 ment in a paroxysm of attention and the next falling 
 into the sleep of indifference — are they to be ob- 
 tained, but by steady, persistent efforts. Above all, 
 it is necessary that they should be acquired in youth, 
 for then do they cost the least effort. Like letters 
 cut in the bark of a tree, they grow and widen with 
 age. Once obtained they are a fortune of them- 
 selves, for their possessor has disposed thereby of 
 the heavier end of the load of life; all the remaining 
 he can carry easily and pleasantly. On the other 
 hand, bad habits, once formed,, will hang forever on 
 the wheels of enterprise, and in the end will assert 
 their supremacy, to the ruin and shame of their 
 victim. 
 
PERSONAL INFLUENCE. 229 
 
 "I shot an arrow in the air; 
 It fell on earth, I knew not where. 
 
 I breathed a song into the air; 
 It fell on earth, I knew not where. 
 
 Long, long afterwards, in an oak, 
 I found the arrow still unbroke, 
 And the song, from beginning to end, 
 I found again in the heart of a friend." 
 
 — H. W. Longfellow. 
 
 cAo 
 
 INFLUENCE is to a man what flavor is to fruit, 
 or fragrance to the flower. It does not develop 
 strength or determine character, but it is the 
 measure of his interior richness and worth, and 
 as the blossom can not tell what becomes of the 
 odor which is wafted away from it by every wind, so 
 no man knows the limit of that influence which con- 
 stantly and imperceptibly escapes from his daily life, 
 and goes out far beyond his conscious knowledge or 
 remotest thought. Influence is a power we exert 
 over others by our thoughts, words, and actions ; by 
 our lives, in short. It is a silent, a pervading, a 
 magnetic, a most wonderful thing. It works in inex- 
 plicably ways. We neither see nor hear it, yet, con- 
 sciously or unconsciously, we exert it. 
 
 Your influence is not confined to yourself or to 
 the scene of your immediate actions ; it extends to 
 others, and will reach to succeeding ages. Future 
 generations will feel the influence of your conduct. 
 
230 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 We all of us at times lose sight of this principle, and 
 apparently act on the assumption that what we do or 
 think or say can affect no one but ourselves. But we 
 are so connected with the immortal beings around us, 
 and with those who are to come after us, that we can 
 not avoid exerting a most important influence over 
 their character and final condition ; and thus, long 
 after we shall be no more — nay, after the world itself 
 shall be no more — the consequences of our conduct 
 to thousands of our fellow-men will be nothing less 
 than everlasting destruction or eternal life. What 
 we do is transacted on a stage of which all in the 
 universe are spectators. What we say is transmitted 
 in echoes that will never cease. What we are is in- 
 fluencing and acting on the rest of mankind. Neutral 
 we can not be. Living we act, and dead we speak ; 
 and the whole universe is the mighty company, for- 
 ever looking and listening ; and all nature the tablets, 
 forever recording the words, the deeds, the thoughts, 
 the passions of mankind. 
 
 It is a high, solemn, almost awful thought for every 
 individual man, that his earthly influence, which has 
 a commencement, will never through all ages have 
 an end ! What is done, is done — has already blended 
 itself with the boundless, ever-living, ever-working 
 universe, and will work there for good or evil, openly 
 or secretly, throughout all time. The life of every 
 man is as the well-spring of a stream, whose small 
 beginnings are, indeed, plain to all, but whose course 
 and destination, as it winds through the expanse of 
 infinite years, only the Omniscient can discern. God 
 
PEBSONAL INFLUENCE. 231 
 
 has written upon the flower that sweetens the air, 
 upon the breeze that rocks the flower upon its stem, 
 upon the rain-drop that swells the mighty river, upon 
 the dew-drops that refresh the smallest sprig of moss 
 that rears its head in the desert, upon the ocean that 
 rocks every swimmer in its channel, upon every pen- 
 ciled shell that sleeps in the caverns of the deep, as 
 well as upon the mighty sun which warms and cheers 
 the millions of creatures that live in its light, — upon 
 all he has written, " None of us liveth to himself." 
 
 The babe that perished on the bosom of its 
 mother, like a flower that bowed its head and 
 drooped amid the death-frosts of time, — that babe, 
 not only in its ima^e, but in its influence, still lives 
 and speaks in the chambers of the mother's heart. 
 The friend with whom we took sweet counsel is re- 
 moved visibly from the outward eye ; but the lessons 
 that he taught, the grand sentiments that he uttered, 
 the deeds of generosity by which he was character- 
 ized, the moral lineaments and likeness of the man, 
 still survive, and appear in the silence of eventide, 
 and on the tablets of memory, and in the light of 
 noon and dewy eve ; and, though dead, he yet speak- 
 eth eloquently and in the midst of us. Every thing 
 leaves a history and an influence. The pebble, as 
 well as the planet, goes attended by its shadow. The 
 rolling rock leaves its scratches on the mountains, 
 the river its channel in the soil, the animal its bones 
 in the stratum, the fern and leaf their modest epitaph 
 in the coal. The falling drop marks its sculpture in 
 the sand or the stone. Not a foot steps into the 
 
232 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 snow or along the ground but prints, in characters 
 more or less lasting, a map of its march. Every act 
 of man inscribes itself in the memories of its fellows, 
 and in his own manners and face. The air is full of 
 sounds, the sky of tokens ; the ground is all mem- 
 oranda and signatures, and every object covered 
 over with hints which speak to the intelligent. 
 
 The sun sets beyond the western hills, but the 
 trail of light he leaves behind him guides the pil- 
 grim to his distant home. The tree falls in the for- 
 est ; but in the lapse of ages it is turned into coal, 
 and our fires burn now the brighter because it grew 
 and fell. The coral insect dies ; but the reef it 
 raised breaks the surge on the shores of great con- 
 tinents, or has formed an isle on the bosom of the 
 ocean, to wave with harvests for the good of man. 
 We live and we die, but the good or evil that we 
 do lives after us, and is not " buried with our bones." 
 
 The career of great men remains an enduring 
 monument of human energy. The man dies and 
 disappears ; but the thoughts and acts survive and 
 leave an indelible stamp on his race. And thus the 
 spirit of his life is prolonged, and thus perpetuated, 
 molding the thought and will, and thereby contrib- 
 uting to form the character of the future. It is the 
 men who advance in the highest and best directions 
 who are the true beacons of human progress. They 
 are as lights set upon a hill, illuminating the moral 
 atmosphere around them ; and the light of their 
 spirit continues to shine upon all succeeding gen- 
 erations. The golden words that good men have 
 
PERSONAL INFLUENCE. 233 
 
 uttered, the examples they have set, live through all 
 time ; they pass into the thoughts and hearts of their 
 successors, help them on the road of life, and often 
 console them in the hour of death. They live a uni- 
 versal life, speak to us from their graves, and beckon 
 us on in the paths which they trod. Their example 
 is still with us, to guide, to influence, and to direct 
 us. Nobility of character is a perpetual bequest, liv- 
 ing from age to age, and constantly tending to repro- 
 duce its like. 
 
 It is what man was that lives and acts after him. 
 What he said sounds along the years like voices 
 amid the mountain gorges, and what he did is re- 
 peated after him in ever multiplying and never ceas- 
 ing reverberations. Every man has left behind him 
 influences for good or evil that will never exhaust 
 themselves. The sphere in which he acts may be 
 small or it may be great, it may be his fireside or it 
 may be a kingdom, a village or a great nation, it 
 may be a parish or broad Europe — but act he , does, 
 ceaselessly and forever. His friends, his family, his 
 successors in office, his relatives are all receptive of 
 an influence, a moral influence, which he has trans- 
 mitted to mankind — either a blessing which will 
 repeat itself in showers of benediction, or a curse 
 which will multiply itself in ever-accumulating evil. 
 
 We see not in life the end of human actions. 
 Their influence never dies. In ever-widening circles 
 it reaches beyond the grave. Death removes us 
 from this to an eternal world. Every morning when 
 we go forth we lay the molding hand on our destiny, 
 
234 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 and every evening when we have done we have left 
 a deathless impress on eternity. "We touch not a 
 wire but that it vibrates to God." 
 
 Since we all have a personal influence, and our 
 words and actions leave a well-nigh indelible trace, 
 it is our duty to make that influence as potential for 
 good as possible. In order to do this you must 
 show yourself a man among men. It is through the 
 invisible lines which you are able to attach to the 
 minds with which you are brought into association 
 that you can influence society in the direction of the 
 greatest good. You can not move men until you are 
 one of them. They will not follow you until they 
 have heard your voice, shaken your hand, and fully 
 learned your principles and your sympathies. It 
 makes no difference how much you know, nor how 
 much you are capable of doing. You may pile ac- 
 complishments upon acquisitions mountain high ; but 
 if you fail to be a social man, demonstrating to so- 
 ciety that your lot is with the rest, a little child with 
 a song in its mouth and a kiss for all and a pair of 
 innocent hands to lay upon the knees shall lead more 
 hearts and change the directions of more lives 
 than you. 
 
 A just appreciation of the power of personal in- 
 fluence leads to a sense of duty resting upon all to 
 see to it that their influence is exerted in inculcating 
 a proper sense of right in the community in which 
 they live ; to be sure that their weight is constantly 
 cast in the scale of right against wrong ; that they be 
 found furthering all matters of enlightened public 
 
PERSONAL INFLUENCE. 235 
 
 concern. They should as far as possible walk through 
 life as a band of music moves down the street, fling- 
 ing out pleasures on every side through the air to all, 
 far and near, that can listen. Some men fill the air 
 with their presence and sweetness, as orchards in 
 October days fill the air with the perfume of ripe 
 fruits. Some women cling to their own homes like 
 the honeysuckle over the door, yet, like it, sweeten 
 all the region with the subtle fragrance of their good- 
 ness. Such men and women are trees of righteous- 
 ness, which are ever dropping precious fruits around 
 them. Their lives shine like starbeams, or charm the 
 heart like songs sung upon a holy day. 
 
 How great a beauty and blessing it is to hold the 
 royal gifts of the soul, so that they shall be music to 
 some and fragrance to others, and life to all! It 
 would be a most worthy object of life to make the 
 power which we have within us the breath of other 
 men's joys ; to scatter sunshine where only clouds 
 and shadows reign ; to fill the atmosphere where 
 earth's weary toilers must stand with a brightness 
 which they can not create for themselves, but long 
 for, enjoy, and appreciate. There is an energy of 
 moral suasion in a good man's life passing the highest 
 efforts of the orator's genius. The seen but silent 
 beauty of holiness speaks more eloquently of God 
 and duty than the tongues of men and angels. Let 
 parents remember this. The best inheritance a par- 
 ent can bequeathe to a child is a virtuous example, 
 a legacy of hallowed remembrance and associations. 
 The beauty of holiness beaming through the life 
 
236 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 of a loved relative or friend is more effectual to 
 strengthen such as do stand in virtue's ways, and 
 raise up those that are bowed down, than precept or 
 command, entreaty or warning. 
 
 Shall our influence be for good or for evil ? For 
 good ? Then let no act of ours be such as could lead 
 a fellow mortal astray. It is a terrible thought that 
 some careless word, uttered it may be in jest, may 
 start some soul upon the downward road. Oh, it is 
 terrible power that we have — the power of influence — 
 and it clings to us. We can not shake it off. It is 
 born with us, and it has grown with our growth and 
 strengthened with our strength. It speaks, it walks, 
 it moves ; it is powerful in every look of our eye, in 
 every word of our mouth, in every act of our lives. 
 We can not live to ourselves. We must be either a 
 light to illumine or a tempest to destroy. We 
 must bear constantly in mind that there is one record 
 we can not interline — our lives written on others' 
 hearts. How gladly we would review and write a 
 kind word there, a generous act here, erase a frown 
 and put in a loving word, a bright smile, and a 
 tender expression. Harshness would be erased, and 
 gentleness written. But, alas ! what is written is 
 written. Clotho will not begin anew to spin the 
 threads of life, and our actions go forth into the 
 world freighted with their burden of good or evil 
 influence. 
 
CHARACTER. 237 
 
 €&f&S&€5B&®- 
 
 c&> 
 
 IMHARACTER is one of the greatest motive 
 §Bs^| powers in the world. In its noblest embodi- 
 f v ments it exemplifies human nature in its high- 
 4 est forms, for it exhibits man at his best. It is 
 the corner-stone of individual greatness — the Doric 
 and splendid column of the majestic structure of a 
 true and dignified man, who is at once a subject and 
 a king. Character is to a man what the fly-wheel 
 is to the engine. By the force of its momentum it 
 carries him through times of temptation and trial; 
 it steadies him in times of popular excitement and 
 tumult, and exerts a guiding and controlling influ- 
 ence over his life. 
 
 There are trying and perilous circumstances in 
 life which show how valuable and important a good 
 character is. It is a strong and sure staff of support 
 when every thing else fails. In the crisis of tempta- 
 tion, in the battle of life, when the struggle comes 
 either from within or without, it is our strength, 
 heroism, virtue, and consistency — our character, in 
 short — which defends and secures our happiness and 
 honor. And if they fail us in the hour of need — in 
 the season of danger — all may be irretrievably lost, 
 and nothing left us except vain regrets and peniten- 
 tial tears. 
 
 Character is power, character is influence, and 
 he who has character, though he may have nothing 
 else, has the means of being eminently useful, not 
 
238 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 only to his immediate friends, but to society, to the 
 Church of God, and to the world. When a person 
 has lost his character all is lost — all peace of mind, 
 all complacency in himself, are fled forever. He 
 despises himself; he is despised by his fellow-men. 
 Within is shame and remorse ; without, neglect and 
 reproach. He is of necessity a miserable and use- 
 less man, and he is so even though he be clad in 
 purple and fine linen, and fare sumptuously every 
 day. It is better to be poor ; it is better to be 
 reduced to beggary; it is better to be cast into 
 prison, or condemned to perpetual slavery than to 
 be destitute of a good name, or endure the pains 
 and evils of a conscious worthlessness of character. 
 The value of character is the standard of human 
 progress. The individual, the community, the na- 
 tion, tell of their standing, their advancement, their 
 worth, their true wealth and glory, in the eye of 
 God, by their estimation of character. That man 
 or nation that lightly esteems character is low, grov- 
 eling, and barbarous. 
 
 Wherever character is made a secondary object 
 sensualism and crime prevail. He who would pros- 
 titute character to reputation is base. He who lives 
 for any thing less than character is mean. He 
 who enters upon any study, pursuit, amusement, 
 pleasure, habit, or course of life, without considering 
 its effect upon his character is not a trusty or an 
 honest man. He whose modes of thought, states 
 of feeling, e very-day acts, common language, and 
 whole outward life, are not directed by a wise refer- 
 
CHARACTER. 239 
 
 ence to their influence upon his character is a man 
 always to be watched. Just as a man prizes his 
 character so is he. 
 
 There is a difference between character and rep- 
 utation. Character is what a man is; reputation 
 is what he is thought to be. Character is within; 
 reputation is without. Character is always real ; 
 reputation may be false. Character is substantial 
 and enduring; reputation may be vapory and fleet- 
 ing. Character is at home; reputation is abroad. 
 Character is in a man's own soul ; reputation is in 
 the minds of others. Character is the solid food of 
 life ; reputation is the dessert. Character is what 
 gives a man value in his own eyes ; reputation is 
 what he is valued at in the eyes of others. Char- 
 acter is his real worth ; reputation is his market 
 price. A man may have a good character and a 
 bad reputation ; or, a man may have a good reputa- 
 tion and a bad character, as we form our opinion of 
 men from what they appear to be, and not from 
 what they really are. Most men are more anxious 
 about their reputation than they are about their 
 character. This is not right. While every man 
 should endeavor to maintain a good reputation, he 
 should especially labor to possess a good character. 
 Our true happiness depends not so much on what is 
 thought of us by others as on what we really are 
 in ourselves. Men of good character are generally 
 men of good reputation, but this is not always the 
 case, as the motives and actions of the best of men 
 are sometimes misunderstood and misrepresented. 
 
240 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 But it is important, above every thing, else that we 
 be right and do right, whether our motives and 
 actions are properly understood and appreciated or 
 not. Nothing can be so important to any man as 
 the formation and possession of a good character. 
 Character is of slow but steady growth, and the 
 smallest child and the humblest and weakest individ- 
 ual may attain heights that now seem inaccessible 
 by the constant and patient exercise of just as much 
 moral power as, from time to time, they possess. 
 The faithful discharge of daily duty, the simple in- 
 tegrity of purpose and power of life that all can 
 attain with effort, contribute silently but surely to 
 the building up of a moral character that knows no 
 limit to its power, no bounds to its heroism. The 
 influences which operate in the formation of charac- 
 ter are numerous, and however trivial some of them 
 may appear they are not to be despised. The most 
 powerful forces in nature are those that operate si- 
 lently and imperceptibly. This is equally true of 
 those moral forces which exert the greatest influence 
 on our minds and give complexion to our character. 
 Among the most powerful are early impressions, 
 examples, and habits. Early impressions, although 
 they may appear to be but slight, are the most en- 
 during, and exert a great influence on life. The 
 tiniest bit of public opinion sown in the minds of 
 children in private life afterwards issue forth to the 
 world and become its public opinions, for nations 
 are gathered out of nurseries. By repetition of acts 
 the character becomes slowly but decidedly formed. 
 
CBAEACTEE. 2-41 
 
 The several acts may seem in themselves trivial, but 
 so are the continuous acts of daily life. 
 
 Our minds are given us. but our characters we 
 make. The full measure oi all the powers necessary 
 to make a man are no more a character than a handful 
 of seeds is an orchard of fruits. Plant the seeds, and 
 tend them well, and they will make an orchard. Cul- 
 tivate the powers, and harmonize them well, and they 
 will make a noble character. The germ is not the 
 tree, the acorn is not the oak ; neither is the mind a 
 character. God gives the mind ; man makes the 
 character. Mind is the garden ; character is the fruit. 
 Mind is the white page; character is the writing we 
 put on it. Mind is the metallic plate ; character is our 
 engravng thereon. Mind is the shop, the counting- 
 room : character is our profits on the trade. Large 
 profits are jnade from quick sales and small percent- 
 age : so great characters are made bv many little acts 
 and efforts. A dollar is composed of a thousand mills ; 
 so is a character oi a thousand thoughts and acts. 
 The secret thought never expressed, the inward in- 
 dulgence in imaginary wronor. the lie never told for 
 want of courage, the licentiousness never indulged in 
 for fear of public rebuke, the irreverence of the 
 heart, are just as effectual in staining the heart as 
 though the world knew ail about them. 
 
 A subtle thing is character, and a constant work 
 is its formation. Whether it be orood or bad, it has 
 been lon^ in its growth and is the ao-a-re^ate of mill- 
 ions of little mental acts. A o-ood character is a 
 
 o 
 
 precious thing, above rubies, gold, crowns, or king- 
 
 16 
 
242 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 doms, and the work of making it is the noblest labor 
 on earth. A good character is in all cases the fruit 
 of personal exertion. It is not an inheritance from 
 parents ; it is not created by external advantages ; it 
 is no necessary appendage of birth, wealth, talents, 
 or station ; but it is the result of one's own endeavors. 
 All the variety of minute circumstances which go to 
 form character are more or less under the control of 
 the individual. Not a day passes without its disci- 
 pline, whether for good or for evil. There is no act, 
 however trivial, but has its train of consequences, as 
 there is no hair, however small, but casts its shadow, 
 
 Not only is character of importance to its pos- 
 sessor as the means of conferring upon him true dig- 
 nity and worth, but it exerts an influence upon the 
 lives of all within its pale, the importance of which 
 can never be overestimated. It might better be 
 called an effluence ; for it is constantly radiating from 
 a man, and then most of all when he is least con- 
 scious of its emanation. We are molding others 
 wherever we are. Books are only useful when they 
 are read ; sermons are only influential when they are 
 listened to ; but character keeps itself at all times 
 before men's attention, and its weight is felt by every 
 one who comes within its sphere. 
 
 Other agencies are intermittent, like the revolving 
 light, which, after a time of brightness, goes out into 
 a period of darkness ; but character is continuous in 
 its operations, and shines with the steady radiance 
 of a star. A good character is therefore to be care- 
 fully maintained for the sake of others, if possible, 
 
CHARACTER. 243 
 
 more than ourselves. It is a coat of triple steel, 
 giving security to the wearer, protection to the op 
 pressed, and inspiring the oppressor with awe. 
 Every man is bound to aim at the possession of a 
 good character as one of the highest objects of his 
 life. His very effort to secure it by worthy means 
 will furnish him with a motive for exertion, and his 
 idea of manhood, in proportion as it is elevated, will 
 steady and animate his motives. The pursuit of it 
 will prove no obstacle to the acquisition of wealth or 
 fame ; but, on the contrary, not only is the attain- 
 ment of a good character an almost indispensable 
 thing for him who would make his mark in the world, 
 but such is the nature of character that the control 
 over the acts and thoughts of an individual, which 
 must be acquired before character can exhibit inher- 
 ent strength, conduces, in a very great degree, to the 
 very condition which produces success. 
 
 Character is the grandest thing man can live for ; 
 it is to have worth of soul, wealth of heart, diamond- 
 dust of mind. He who has this aim lives to be what 
 he ought to be, and to do what duty requires. To 
 him comes fame, delighted to crown him with her 
 wreaths of honor. Sum it up as we will, character 
 is the great desideratum of human life. This truth, 
 sublime in its simplicity and powerful in its beauty, 
 is the highest lesson of religion, the first that youth 
 should learn, and the last that age should forget. 
 
244 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 'Prudence, thou virtue of the mind, by which 
 We do consult of all that's good or ill." 
 
 ofe 
 
 ^BMONGST the milder virtues which contribute 
 
 to round out and perfect life is to be found 
 
 ml 
 
 $\ 
 
 y Prudence. It is a mild and pleasing quality. 
 It counsels moderation and guidance by wisdom. 
 It is practical wisdom, and comes of the cultivated 
 judgment. It has reference in all things to fitness, 
 to propriety, judging wisely of the right thing to be 
 done and the right way of doing it. It calculates the 
 means, order, time, and method of doing. Prudence 
 learns from experience quickened by knowledge. It 
 seeks to keep the practical path rather than that 
 which, indeed, promises brilliant results, but takes 
 the traveler along dangerous precipices and through 
 places where there is a risk of his losing all. 
 
 The most brilliant attainments are rendered nuga- 
 tory for w r ant of prudence, as the giant deprived of 
 his eyes is only the more exposed by reason of his 
 enormous strength and stature. Prudence is the 
 perfection of reason, and a guide to us in all the du- 
 ties of life. It is invariably found in men of good 
 sound sense, and is, indeed, their most shining quality, 
 giving value as it does to all the rest, sets them to 
 work in their proper time and places, and turns them 
 to the advantage of the person who is possessed of 
 them. Without it learning is pedantry and wit im- 
 pertinence ; virtue itself looks like weakness. The 
 
PRUDENCE. 245 
 
 best parts only qualify a man to be more sprightly in 
 errors and active to his own principles. Prudence is 
 a quality incompatible with vice, and can never be 
 effectually enlisted in its cause, and he who deliber- 
 ately gives himself over to the power of vice and 
 evil habits can never be said to be acting according 
 to the dictates of the highest reason, wherein pru- 
 dence is always distinguished. 
 
 It is difficult to define wherein prudence doth con- 
 sist, inasmuch as the rules of prudence in general, 
 like the laws of the stone tablet, are for the most 
 part prohibitive. "Thou shalt not," is their charac- 
 teristic formula. It is easier to state what is for- 
 bidden under certain circumstances than what is 
 required. It is shown in practical every-day life by 
 thoughtful actions on the thousand petty questions 
 which are constantly claiming attention. It is hesi- 
 tating and slow to believe what is not sanctioned by 
 past experience, and prefers not to run any very 
 great risks in testing new plans for gaining the great 
 object of life, preferring the sure to the doubtful, 
 even though the latter may seem to have many ad- 
 vantages. It recognizes that there is a necessity for 
 a certain amount of caution in all the transactions of 
 business; hence the old saying, "Prudent men lock 
 up their motives, letting familiars have a key to their 
 hearts as to their garden." It weighs long and care- 
 fully the reasons for or against any proposed line of 
 conduct, and calls upon the will to act only in ac- 
 cordance with the result of such reasoning. 
 
 In nothing does prudence display itself more than 
 
246 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 in relation to the little affairs of life. There are 
 those who in the confidence of superior capacities or 
 attainments neglect the common maxims of life. But 
 this is a fatal delusion, as nothing will supply the want 
 of prudence in the ordinary vocations of business, 
 no matter how superior the other qualities. Negli- 
 gence and irregularity long continued will make 
 knowledge useless, wit ridiculous, and genius con- 
 temptible. The merchant may, indeed, win thou- 
 sands by speculations ; but the only sure way of at- 
 taining to fortune, place, or honor is by obedience 
 to well-known laws of business prudence, which dis- 
 countenance speculation unbased on substantial facts. 
 
 Such are the vicissitudes of human life that, what- 
 ever the calling may be, scarcely a day passes that 
 does not call upon all to exercise this quality in some 
 of the common every-day occurences, as well as in 
 the unexpected emergencies which fate is constantly 
 presenting to us. The triumph of its long exercise 
 is to be seen in those moments when to come at a 
 wrong decision means disastrous defeat, the fatal 
 overthrow of the hopes of a life-time. It by degrees 
 forms for itself a standard of duty and propriety, ac- 
 cumulates rules and maxims of conduct, and materi- 
 als for reflection and meditation. 
 
 The tongue of prudence knows when to speak 
 and when to be silent. It is not cowardly ; it dares 
 to say all that need be said, but it does not tell all 
 that it knows. It is careful what it speaks, when it 
 speaks, and to whom it speaks. When you have 
 need of a needle you move your fingers delicately 
 
TEMPERANCE. 247 
 
 with a wise caution. Use the same prudence with 
 the inevitable affairs of life ; give attention, and keep 
 yourself from undue precipitation, otherwise it will 
 fare hardly with you. 
 
 ||llHERE is beauty in temperance like that which 
 ,«^% is portrayed in virtue and in truth. It is a 
 Tj close ally of both, and, like them, has that 
 all-pervading essence and quality which chas- 
 tens the feelings, invigorates the mind, and displays 
 the perfection of the soul in the very aspect. Like 
 water from the rill, rain from the cloud, or light from 
 the heavenly bodies, the thought issues pure from 
 within, refreshing, unsullied, and radiant. There is 
 no grossness, no dross, no corruption, for temper- 
 ance, when effectually realized, is full of loveliness 
 and joy, and virtue and purity are the lineaments 
 in which it lives, Temperance is a virtue without 
 pride, and fortune without envy ; the best guardian 
 of youth and support of old age ; the preceptor of 
 reason as well as of religion, and physician of the 
 soul as well as the body; the tutelar goddess of 
 health and universal medicine of life. 
 
 Temperance keeps the senses clear and unem- 
 barrassed, and makes them seize the object with 
 more keenness and satisfaction. It appears with life 
 in the face and decorum in the person. It gives 
 
248 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 you the command of your head, secures you health, 
 and preserves you in a condition for business. Tem- 
 perance is a virtue which casts the truest luster upon 
 the person it is lodged in, and has the most general 
 influence upon all other particular virtues of any 
 that the soul of man is capable of; indeed, so gen- 
 eral is it that there is hardly any noble quality or 
 endowment of the mind but must own temperance 
 either for its parent or its nurse ; it is the greatest 
 strengthener and clearer of reason, and the best 
 preparer of it for religion ; it is the sister of pru- 
 dence and the handmaid to devotion. 
 
 Pleasure has been aptly compared to a sea. 
 Intemperance is a maelstrom situated in the very 
 center of this great sea. Not one path alone leads 
 to this gulf of woe ; not one only current, as too 
 many have supposed, hurries down this dark abyss, 
 but all around, on every side, the waters tend down- 
 ward. There are a thousand currents leading in. 
 Some, it is true, are more rapid than others. Some 
 rush in quickly and bear down all who ride upon 
 their waters to quick and certain ruin. Others glide 
 more slowly, but none the less surely, to the same 
 end. The streams of intemperance are legions. 
 The allurements that lead downward are equally 
 numerous. Every appetite, lust, passion, and feel- 
 ing holds out various allurements to intemperate 
 indulgence. There is not a power of the mind, af- 
 fection of the heart, nor desire of the body that may 
 not dispose to some form of intemperance which may 
 injure the physical being or paralyze the energies of 
 
TEMPERANCE. 249 
 
 the mind. All forms of intemperance are evil and 
 destroy some function of mind or body — some mem- 
 ber or faculty, the disease of which spreads inhar- 
 mony through the whole. The dangers from this 
 source are imminent and fearful, and spread on 
 every hand. 
 
 Temperance conduces to health; indeed, it may 
 be said that health can only be acquired or main- 
 tained by temperance. This is the law primary and 
 essential which every youth should know, and know 
 by heart. Bodily pains and aches tell of intemper- 
 ance in some directions. Pain means penalty, and 
 penalty means that its sufferer should reform. The 
 most of our pains are occasioned by intemperance. 
 This is the fruitful mother of nine-tenths of the 
 diseases that flesh is heir to and the sins that the 
 soul doth commit. We sin by excess of anger, lust, 
 appetite, affection, love of gain, authority, or praise. 
 Few, if any, are the sins that grow not out of intem- 
 perance in some form. Intemperance means excess. 
 A thing is good as long as it is necessary. All 
 beyond necessity, or what is necessary, is evil. 
 Money is good ; more than what is necessary to 
 the ends of life is evil. Food is good; too much 
 is evil. Light is good; too much will put out our 
 eyes. Water is good; too much will destroy us. 
 Heat is good ; too much will burn us. The praise 
 of men is good ; too much will ruin us. The love 
 of life is good; too much will make us miserable. 
 Fear is good; too much hath torment. Prayer is 
 good; too much cheats labor of its life and is evil. 
 
250 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 Sympathy is good; too much floods us with perpet- 
 ual grief. Reason is good ; too much pressed with 
 labor it dethrones the mind and spreads ruin abroad. 
 Any excess in the use or activity of a good thing is 
 intemperance and, therefore, evil, and to be avoided. 
 
 Temperance as a virtue dwells in the heart. It 
 consists in a rigid subjection of every inward feeling 
 and power to the rule of right reason. He who 
 would be thoroughly temperate must master himself. 
 His passions must be his subjects obeying his will. 
 From the heart he must be temperate. He must 
 remember that the intemperance slope is an almost 
 imperceptible one, and that he may be gliding down 
 it when he dreams of naught but safety. He must 
 remember, too, that the field of temperance is a 
 broad one, covering the whole area of life. It is not 
 simply against one form of appetite, one species of in- 
 dulgence that he is to guard, but against all. There 
 are other species of intemperate indulgence, of which 
 we are all more or less guilty, than indulgence in 
 drink. Indeed, the indulgence of appetite carries 
 away more victims from the earth than does drunk- 
 enness, and spreads a wider devastation and a more 
 general blight. 
 
 All species of intemperance grow of a want of 
 self-control. To be a temperance man a man must 
 master himself, must be a brave, noble conqueror of 
 every enemy within his own bosom. It is no small 
 matter. It is the masterpiece of human attainments. 
 The laws of temperance can never be broken with 
 impunity. The excess is committed to-day, but the 
 
TEMPERANCE 251 
 
 effect is experienced to-morrow. The law of nature, 
 invariable in its operation, is, that penalty shall fol- 
 low excess. The punishment is mild at first., but 
 afterwards more and more severe, until, when na- 
 ture's warning voice has been unheeded and her pun- 
 ishments disregarded, the final penalty is death. If 
 an admonitory si°m-board were hun^ out for the 
 benefit of the young, there should be inscribed upon 
 it in prominent characters "no excess." It is to be 
 remembered that the best principles, if pushed too 
 far, degenerate into fatal vices. Generosity is nearly 
 allied to extravagance ; charity itself may lead to 
 ruin; the sternness of justice is but one step removed 
 from the severity of oppression. 
 
 If one would make the most of life he must be 
 temperate in all things. It is the application of rea- 
 son to all the daily acts of life. It is the highest and 
 best form of life that one can attain to. It leads not 
 only to the greatest happiness, but also to honor and 
 position. By abstaining from most things it is sur- 
 prising how many things we enjoy. To establish 
 thoroughly and widely the principles of temperance 
 we must begin with the youth. They have a high 
 aspiration to be good and true. They see a glory in 
 the path of right. Freedom is a word of power in 
 their ears. Virtue has many charms not only for 
 their hearts, but for their imaginations. They have 
 health, competency, and happiness. They are ambi- 
 tious of every good. When the true principles of 
 temperance are established in early life and made 
 the controlling power through life, they insure health, 
 
252 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 freedom from pain, competency, respectability, honor, 
 virtue, usefulness, and happiness — all for which true 
 men live or hope for in this life. Happy would it be 
 if they were general, and all youths would practice 
 them. Then would religion assert her mild and gen- 
 tle sway, peace plant her olive wreath in every na- 
 tion, wisdom, divine and time-honored, shed every- 
 where her glorious light. A race of men and women, 
 full of rosy health, strong, active, symmetrical, beau- 
 tiful as the artist's model ; pure, virtuous, wise, affec- 
 tionate, full of honor and lofty principles, would grow 
 up into communities and nations, and make the earth 
 bloom and rejoice in more than Eden gladness. A 
 new heaven and a new earth would surround us with 
 beauty and arch us over with glory, for the old 
 would have passed away. 
 
 IIJRUGALITY may be termed the daughter of 
 Prudence, the sister of Temperance, and the 
 w parent of Liberty and Ease. It is synonymous 
 with economy, and is a sound understanding 
 brought into action. It is calculation realized ; it is 
 the doctrine of proportion educed to practice. It is 
 foreseeing contingencies and providing against them. 
 Its other and less reputable sisters are Avarice and 
 Prodigality. She alone keeps the straight and safe 
 path, while Avarice sneers at her as profuse, and 
 
FRUGALITY. 253 
 
 Prodigality scorns at her as penurious. To the poor 
 she is indispensable ; to those of moderate means she 
 is found the representative of wisdom. Joined to in- 
 dustry and sobriety, she is a better outfit to business 
 than a dowry. She conducts her votaries to compe- 
 tence and honor, while Profuseness is a cruel and 
 crafty demon, that gradually involves her followers in 
 dependence and debt. 
 
 Frugality shineth in her best light when joined to 
 liberality. The first consists in leaving off superflu- 
 ous expense ; the last is bestowing them to the ben- 
 efit of those that need. The first without the last 
 begets covetousness ; the last without the first begets 
 prodigality. There is ever a golden mean between 
 frugality and stinginess, or closeness. He that spar- 
 eth in every thing is an inexcusable niggard ; he that 
 spareth in nothing is an inexcusable madman. The 
 golden mean of frugality is to spare in what is least 
 necessary, and to lay out more liberally in what is 
 most required in our several circumstances. It is no 
 man's duty to deny himself every amusement, every 
 recreation, every comfort, that he may get rich. It 
 is no man's duty to make an iceberg of himself, 
 and to deny himself the enjoyment that results from 
 his generous actions, merely that he may hoard 
 wealth for his heirs to quarrel about. But there is 
 an economy which is especially commendable in the 
 man who struggles with poverty, and is every man's 
 duty — an economy which is consistent with happi- 
 ness, and which must be practiced if the poor man 
 would secure independence. 
 
254 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 When one is blessed with good sense and fair 
 opportunities, this spirit of economy is one of the 
 most beneficial of all secular gifts, and takes high 
 rank among the minor virtues. It is by this myste- 
 rious power that the loaf is multiplied, that using 
 does not waste, that little becomes much, that scat- 
 tered fragments grow to unity, and that out of noth- 
 ing, or next to nothing, comes the miracle of some- 
 thing. Frugality is not merely saving, still less 
 parsimony. It is foresight and combination. It is 
 insight and arrangement. It is a subtle philosophy 
 of things, by which new uses, new compositions, are 
 discovered. It causes inert things to labor, useless 
 things to serve our necessities, perishing things to 
 renew their vigor, and all things to exert themselves 
 for human comfort. 
 
 As the acquisition of knowledge depends more 
 upon what a man remembers than upon the quantity 
 of his reading, so the acquisition of property depends 
 more upon what is saved than upon what is earned. 
 The largest reservoir, though fed by abundant and 
 living springs, will fail to supply their owners with 
 water if secret leaking-places are permitted to drain 
 off their contents. In like manner, though by his 
 skill and energy a man may convert his business into 
 a flowing Pactolus, ever depositing its golden sands 
 in his coffers, yet, through the numerous wants of 
 unfrugal habits, he may live embarrassed and die 
 poor. Economy is the guardian of property, the 
 good genius whose presence guides the footsteps of 
 every prosperous and successful man. 
 
FRUGALITY. 255 
 
 Either a man must be content with poverty all 
 his life, or else be willing to deny himself some lux- 
 uries, and save to lay the base of independence in 
 the future. But if a man defies the future, and 
 spends all that he earns, whether it be much or little, 
 let him look for lean and hungry want at some future 
 time ; for it will surely come, no matter what he 
 thinks. To economize and be frugal is absolutely 
 the only way to get a solid fortune ; there is no other 
 certain mode on earth. Those who shut their eyes 
 and ears to these plain facts will be forever poor. 
 Fortune does not give away her real and substantial 
 goods. She sells them to the highest bidder, to the 
 hardest, wisest worker for the boon. Men never 
 make so fatal a mistake as when they think they are 
 mere creatures of fate ; it is the sheerest folly in the 
 world. Every man may make or mar his life, which- 
 ever he may choose. Fortune is for those who, by 
 diligence, honesty, and frugality, place themselves in 
 a position to grasp hold of fortune when it appears 
 in view. 
 
 Simple industry and thrift will go far towards 
 making any person of ordinary working faculties 
 comparatively independent in his means. Almost 
 any working-man may be so, provided he will care- 
 fully husband his resources and watch the little out- 
 lets of useless expenditures. A penny is a very 
 small matter, yet the comfort of thousands of families 
 depends upon the proper saving and spending of 
 pennies. If a man allows the little pennies — the 
 results of his hard work — to slip out of his fingers 
 
256 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 he will find that his life is little raised above one of 
 mere animal drudgery. 
 
 One way in which true economy is shown con- 
 sists in living within one's income. This is the grand 
 element of success in acquiring property. To carry 
 it out requires resolution, self-denial, self-reliance. 
 But it must be done, or grinding poverty will accom- 
 pany you through life. We urge upon all young men 
 who are just starting in life to make it an invariable 
 rule to lay aside a certain proportion of their income, 
 whatever that income may be. Extravagant expend- 
 itures occasion a large part of the suffering of a 
 great majority of people. And extravagance is wholly 
 a relative term. . What is not at all extravagant 
 for one person may be very much so for another. 
 Expenditures, no matter how small in themselves 
 they may be, are always extravagant when they come 
 fully up to the entire amount of a person's income. 
 
 On every hand we see people living on credit, 
 putting off pay-day to the last, making, in the end, 
 some desperate effort — generally by borrowing — to 
 scrape the money together, and then struggling on 
 again with the canker of care eating at their hearts ; 
 but their exertions are vain ; they land at last in the 
 inevitable goal of bankruptcy. If they would only 
 be content to make the push in the beginning, in- 
 stead of the end, they would save themselves all 
 this misery. The great secret of being solvent and 
 well-to-do and comfortable is to get ahead of your 
 expenses. Eat and drink this month what you earned 
 last month, not what you are going to earn next 
 
 
FRUGALITY. 257 
 
 month. It is unsafe to draw drafts on the future, 
 for hope is deceitful, and your paper is liable to go 
 to protest. When one is once weighed down with a 
 load of debt he loses the sense of being free and 
 independent. The man with his fine house, his glit- 
 tering carriage, and his rich banquets, for which he 
 is in debt, is a slave, a prisoner, dragging his chains 
 behind him through all the grandeur of the false 
 world through which he moves. 
 
 In urging a course of strict economy we admit 
 that it is hard, embarrassing, perplexing, onerous, 
 but it is by no means impracticable. A cool survey 
 of one's expenditures, compared with his income ; a 
 wise balancing of ends to be gained ; a firm and calm 
 determination to break with custom wherever it is 
 opposed to good sense, and a patience that does not 
 chafe at small and gradual results, will do much 
 towards establishing the principle of economy and 
 securing its benefits. Economy has, however, deeper 
 roots than even this — in the desires. It is there, 
 after all, that we control our expenditures. As a 
 general rule we may be sure that we shall spend our 
 money for what we most earnestly crave. If it be 
 luxury and display then it will melt into costly viands 
 and soft clothing, handsome dwellings and rich furni- 
 ture. If, on the other hand, our desires are for 
 higher enjoyments, or for benevolent purposes, our 
 money will . flow into these channels. Every one, 
 then, who cherishes in himself, or excites in others, 
 a desire more pure and noble than existed before, 
 
 who draws the heart from the craving- of sense to 
 
 17 
 
258 lOLDBS 2KMS J UWR 
 
 those of soul, from self to others, from what is low, 
 sensual, and wrong to what is pure, elevating, and 
 right, in so far establishes, on the firmest of all 
 foundations a wise economy, 
 
 A true economy appears :: induce the exertion 
 of almost every laudable emotion; a strict regard to 
 hones: a laudable spirit of independence; a judi- 
 cious prudence in providing for the wants, and a 
 steady :enevolence in preparing for the claims of 
 the future. Such an economy can but appeal to the 
 good sense ::" all jandidlv ponder over life and 
 
 its realties. To spend all that you acquire as soon 
 as you gain it is :: lead a butterfly existence. Were 
 vou always :: be young and free from sickness and 
 care, and life re : pass as one perpetual Summer. 
 it would do no harm to so live ; but care will come. 
 sickness may strike you at any time. and. if you es- 
 cape these, yet you know life has its Autumnal and 
 Winter seasons as well as its Summer. And, alas! 
 for the veteran who ends himself obliged to learn in 
 his latter years the lessons of strict economy for the 
 first rime, having lived in utter defiance of them in 
 the season erf youth and strength. 
 
PATIESCE. 259 
 
 ATIENCE is the ballast of the soul, that will 
 88 keep it from rolling and tumbling in the great- 
 est storms. All life is but one vast represen- 
 tation of the beauty and value of patience. 
 Troubles and sorrows are in store for all. It is 
 useless to try to escape them, and, indeed, it is well 
 we can not, as they seem essential to the perfection 
 and development of character into its highest and 
 best form. But their disciplinary value arises from 
 the great lesson of patience they are constantly in- 
 culcating. 
 
 Either patience must be a quality graciously in- 
 herent in the heart of man, or it must be acquired 
 as the lesson of years' experience, if he would enjoy 
 the greatest good of life. Without it prosperity will 
 be continually disturbed, and adversity will be clouded 
 with double darkness. The loud complaint, the quer- 
 ulous temper and fretful spirit disgrace every charac- 
 ter. We weaken thereby the sympathy of others, 
 and estrange them from offices of kindness and com- 
 fort. But to maintain a steady and unbroken mind 
 amidst all the shocks of adversity forms the highest 
 honor of man. Afflictions supported by patience and 
 surmounted by fortitude give the last finishing stroke 
 to the heroic and virtuous character. Patience pro- 
 duces unity in the Church, loyalty in the state, har- 
 mony in families and societies. She comforts the 
 poor and moderates the rich ; she makes us humble 
 
260 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 in prosperity, cheerful in adversity, unmoved by cal- 
 umny, and above reproach ; she teaches us to forgive 
 those who have injured us, and to be the first in ask- 
 ing the forgiveness of those whom we have injured ; 
 she delights the faithful, and invites the unbelieving ; 
 she adorns the woman and approves the man ; she is 
 beautiful in either sex and every age. 
 
 Patience has been defined as the ''courage of 
 virtue ;" the principle which enables us to lessen the 
 pains of mind or body ; an emotion that does not so 
 much add to the number of our joys as it tends to 
 diminish the number of our sufferings. If life is 
 made to abound with pains and troubles by the errors 
 and the crimes of man, it is no small advantage to 
 have a faculty that enables us to soften these pains 
 and ameliorate these troubles. He that has patience 
 can have what he will. There is no road too long to 
 the man who advances deliberately and without undue 
 haste. There are no honors too distant for the man 
 who prepares himself for them with patience. Nature 
 herself abounds with examples of patience. Day 
 follows the murkiest night, and when the time comes 
 the latest fruits also ripen. Its most beneficent ope- 
 rations, and those which take place on a grand scale, 
 are the results of patience. The great works of 
 human power, achieved by the hand of genius, are 
 but eloquent examples of what may be achieved by 
 the exercise of this virtue. History and biography 
 abound with examples of signal patience shown by 
 great men under trying circumstances. 
 
 In the pursuit of wordly success patience or a 
 
PATIENCE. 261 
 
 willingness to bide one's time is no less necessary as 
 a factor than perseverance. Says De Maistre, "To 
 know how to wait is the great secret of success." 
 And of all the lessons that humanity teaches in this 
 school of the world, the hardest is to wait. Xot to 
 wait with folded hands that claim life's prizes without 
 previous effort, but having toiled and struggled and 
 crowded the slow years with trial to see then no re- 
 sults, or, perhaps, disastrous results, and yet to stand 
 firm, to preserve one's poise, and relax no effort, — 
 this, it has been truly said, is greatness, whether 
 achieved by man or woman. The world can not be 
 circumnavigated bv one wind. The grandest results 
 can not be achieved in a day. The fruits that are 
 best worth plucking usually ripen the most slowly, 
 and, therefore, every one who would gain a solid 
 success must learn "to labor and to wait." What a 
 world of meaning in those few words ! And how 
 many are possessed of the moral courage to live in 
 that state ? It is the tendency of the times to be in 
 a hurry when there is any object to be accomplished. 
 In the pursuit of riches it is only the exceptional 
 persons who are content with slow gains, willing to 
 acquire wealth by adding penny to penny, dollar to 
 dollar ; the mass of business men are too apt to de- 
 spise such a tedious and laborious means of ascent, 
 and they rush headlong into schemes for the sudden 
 acquisition of wealth. Or, in the field of professional 
 life, we are too prone to forget there is no royal road 
 to great acquirements, and feel an unwillingness to 
 lay broad and deep, by years of patient study and 
 
262 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 laborious research, the foundation whereon to build 
 an enduring monument worthy of public credit and 
 renown. 
 
 The history of all who are honored in the world 
 of literature, arts, or science is the history of patient 
 study for years, and its final triumph. Elihu Burritt 
 says: ''All that I have accomplished, or expect or 
 hope to accomplish, has been, and will be, by that 
 patient, persevering process of accretion which builds 
 the ant-heap, particle by particle, thought by thought, 
 fact by fact." Labor still is, and ever will be, the 
 inevitable price set upon every thing which is valu- 
 able. Hence, if we would acquire wisdom, we must 
 diligently apply ourselves, and confront the same con- 
 tinuous application which our forefathers did. We 
 must be satisfied to work energetically with a pur- 
 pose, and wait the results with patience. All prog- 
 ress, of the best kind, is slow ; but to him who works 
 faithfully and in a right spirit, be sure that the reward 
 will be vouchsafed in its own good time. Courage 
 must have sunk in despair, and the world must have 
 remained unimproved and unornamented if man had 
 merely compared the effect of a single stroke of the 
 chisel with the pyramid to be raised, or of a single 
 impression of the spade with the mountain to be 
 leveled. We must continuously apply ourselves to 
 right pursuits, and we can not fail to advance stead- 
 ily, though it may be unconsciously. 
 
 In all evils which admit a remedy impatience 
 should be avoided, because it wastes that time and 
 attention in complaints that, if properly applied, 
 
PATIENCE. 263 
 
 might remove the cause. In cases that admit of no 
 remedy it is worse than useless to give way to impa- 
 tience, both because of the utter uselessness of so 
 doing as well as that the time thus spent could be 
 better employed in the furtherance of useful designs. 
 Since, then, these two classes of ills comprise all to 
 which human nature is subject, why not make a de- 
 termined struggle against impatience in every form ? 
 It accomplishes nothing that is of value, divides our 
 efforts, frustrates our plans, and generally succeeds 
 in making our lives miserable not only to ourselves, 
 but to all around us. 
 
 How much of home happiness and comfort de- 
 pends upon the exercise of patience ! Not a day 
 passes but calls for its exercise from those who sus- 
 tain the nearest and dearest relations to each other. 
 Let patience have her perfect work in the home 
 circle. Let parents be patient with their children. 
 They are weak, and you are strong. They stand at 
 the eastern gate of life. Experience has not taught 
 them to speak carefully and to go softly. What if 
 their plays and amusements do grate upon your 
 nerves. Bear with them patiently. Care and time 
 will soon enough check their childish impulses. Be 
 patient with your friends. They are neither omnis- 
 cient nor omnipotent. They can not see your heart, 
 and may misunderstand you. They do not know 
 what is best for you, and may select what is worst. 
 What if, also, they lack purity of purpose or tenacity 
 of affection ; do not you lack these graces ? Patience 
 is your refuge. Endure, and in enduring conquer 
 
264 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 them ; and if not them, then at least yourself. Be 
 patient with pains and cares. These things are killed 
 by enduring them, but made strong to bite and sting 
 by feeding them with your frets and fears. There is 
 no pain or cure that can last long. None of them 
 shall enter the city of God. A little while, and you 
 shall leave behind you all your troubles, and forget, 
 in your first hour of rest, that such things were on 
 earth. Above all, be patient with your beloved. 
 Love is the best thing on earth ; but it is to be han- 
 dled tenderly, and impatience is the nurse that kills it. 
 Try to smooth life's weary way each for the other, 
 and in the exercise of the heaven-born virtue of pa- 
 tience will you find the sweetest pleasure of life. 
 
 ^tig-eo^msoti. 
 
 •#$%• 
 
 ||||ELF-CONTROL is the highest form of courage. 
 <^® It is the base of all the virtues. It is one of 
 flf the most important but one of the most difficult 
 things for a powerful mind to be its own master. 
 If he reigns within himself, and rules passions, de- 
 sires, and fears, he is more than a king. 
 
 Too often self-control is made to mean only the 
 control of angry passions, but that is simply one form 
 of self-control ; in another — a higher and more com- 
 plete sense — it means the control over all the pas- 
 sions, appetites, and impulses. True wisdom ever 
 seeks to restrain one from blindly following his own 
 
SELF-CONTROL. 265 
 
 impulses and appetites, even those which are moral 
 and intellectual, as well as those which are animal 
 and sensual. In the supremacy of self-control con- 
 sists one of the perfections of the ideal man. Not 
 to be impulsive, not to be spurred hither and thither 
 by each desire that in turn comes uppermost, but to 
 be self-restrained, self-balanced, governed by the 
 joined decision of the feelings in council assembled, 
 before whom every action shall have been fully de- 
 bated and calmly determined, — this is true strength 
 and wisdom. 
 
 Mankind are endowed by the Creator with quali- 
 ties which raise them infinitely higher in the scale of 
 importance than any other members of the animal 
 world. They are given reason as a guide to follow 
 rather than instinct. But if men give the reins to 
 their impulses and passions, from that moment they 
 surrender this high prerogative. They are carried 
 along the current of their life and become the slaves 
 of their strongest desires for the time being. To be 
 morally free — to be more than an animal — man must 
 be able to resist instinctive impulses. This can only 
 be done by the exercise of self-control. Thus it is 
 this power that constitutes the real distinction be- 
 tween a physical and a moral life, and that forms 
 the primary basis of individual character. Nine- 
 tenths of the vicious desires that degrade society, 
 and the crimes that disgrace it, would shrink into 
 insignificance before the advance of valiant self-dis- 
 cipline, self-respect, and self-control. 
 
 It is necessary to one's personal happiness to 
 
266 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 exercise control over his words as well as his acts, 
 for there are words that strike even harder than 
 blows, and men may "speak daggers," even though 
 they use none. Character exhibits itself in control 
 of speech as much as in any thing else. The wise 
 and forbearant man will restrain his desire to say a 
 smart or severe thing at the expense of another's 
 feelings, while the fool speaks out what he thinks, 
 and will sacrifice his friend rather than his joke. 
 There are men who are headlong in their language 
 as in their actions because of the want of forbear- 
 ance and self-restraining patience. 
 
 Government is at the bottom of all progress. 
 The state or nation that has the best government 
 progresses most ; so the individual who governs best 
 himself makes the most rapid progress. The native 
 energies of the human soul press it to activity ; con- 
 trolled they bear it forward in right paths ; uncon- 
 trolled they urge it on to probable destruction. No 
 man is free who has not the command over himself, 
 but allows his appetites or his temper to control him ; 
 and to triumph over these is of all conquests the 
 most glorious. He who is enslaved to his passions 
 is worse governed than Athens was by her thirty- 
 tyrants. He who indulges his sense in any excesses 
 renders himself obnoxious to his own reason, and to 
 gratify the brute in him displeases the man and sets 
 his two natures at variance. We ought not to sac- 
 rifice the sentiments of the soul to gratify the appe- 
 tites of the body. Passions are excellent servants, 
 and when properly trained and disciplined are capable 
 
SELF-CONTROL. 267 
 
 of being applied to noble purposes; but when al- 
 lowed to become masters they are dangerous in the 
 extreme. 
 
 To resist strong impulses, to subdue powerful 
 passions, to silence the voice of vehement desire, is 
 a strong and noble virtue. And the virtue rises in 
 height, beauty, and grandeur in proportion to the 
 strength of the impulses subdued. True virtue is 
 not always visible to the gaze of the world. It is 
 often still and calm. Composure is often the highest 
 result of power, and there are seasons when to be 
 still demands immeasurably higher strength than to 
 act. Think you it demands no power to calm the 
 stormy elements of passions, to throw off the load of 
 dejection, to repress every repining thought when 
 the dearest hopes are withered, and to turn the 
 wounded spirit from dangerous reveries and wasting 
 grief to the quiet discharge of ordinary duties? Is 
 there no power put forth when a man, stripped of 
 his property — of the fruits of a life's labor — quells 
 discontent and gloomy forebodings, and serenely 
 and patiently returns to the task which providence 
 assigns? We doubt not that the all-seeing eye of 
 God sometimes discerns the sublimest human energy 
 under a form and countenance which, by their com- 
 posure and tranquillity, indicate to the human spec- 
 tator only passive virtues. Individuals who have 
 attained such power are among the great ones of 
 earth. 
 
 Strength of character consists in two things, — 
 power of will and power of self-restraint. It requires 
 
268 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 « 
 
 two things, therefore, for its existence, — strong feel- 
 ings and strong command over them. Ofttimes we 
 mistake strong feelings for strong character. He is 
 not a strong man who bears all before him, at whose 
 frown domestics tremble and the children of the 
 household quake ; on the contrary, he is a weak 
 man. It is his passions that are strong ; he, mas- 
 tered by them, is weak. You must measure the 
 strength of a man by the power of the feelings he 
 subdues, not by the power of those that subdue 
 him. Did we ever see a man receive a flagrant 
 injury, and then reply calmly ? That is a man spir- 
 itually strong. Or did we ever see a man in anguish 
 stand as if carved out of solid rock mastering him- 
 self, or one bearing a hopeless daily trial remain 
 silent and never tell the world what cankered his 
 peace ? That is strength. He who with strong pas- 
 sions remains chaste, he who, keenly sensitive, with 
 manly powers of indignation in him, can be provoked 
 and yet restrain himself and forgive, these are strong 
 men, the spiritual heroes. 
 
 A strong temper is not necessarily a bad temper. 
 But the stronger the temper the greater is the need 
 of self-discipline and self-control. Strong temper may 
 only mean a strong and excitable will. Uncontrolled 
 it displays itself in fitful outbreaks of passion ; but 
 controlled and held in subjection, like steam pent up 
 within the mechanism of a steam engine, it becomes 
 the source of energetic power and usefulness. Some 
 of the greatest characters in history have been men 
 of strong tempers, but with equal strength of deter- 
 
SELF-CONTROL. 269 
 
 initiation to hold their motive power under strict regu- 
 lation and control. He is usually a moral weakling 
 who has no strong desires or strong temper to over- 
 come ; but he who with these fails to subdue them is 
 speedily ruined by them. 
 
 Man is born for dominion ; but he must enter it 
 by conquest, and continue to do* battle for every inch 
 of ground added to his sway. His infant exertions 
 are put forth to establish the authority of his will 
 over his physical powers. His after efforts are for 
 the subjection of the will to the judgment. There 
 are times which come to all of us when our will is not 
 completely fashioned to our hands, and the restless 
 passions of the mind hold us in sway — seasons when 
 all of us do and say things which are unbecoming, 
 unseemly, and which lower and debase us in the 
 opinion of others and also of ourselves. Self-control, 
 however, is a virtue which will become ours if we 
 cultivate it properly, if we strive right manfully for its 
 possession ; fight a bitter warfare against irritability, 
 nervousness, jealousy, and all unkindness of heart 
 and soul. But it must be cultivated properly. One 
 exercise of it will not win us the victory. We must, 
 by constant repetition of efforts, obtain at last the 
 victory which will bring us repose, which will enable 
 us to say to the raging waves of passion, ''Thus far 
 canst thou come, and no farther." We must be 
 faithful to ourselves, faithful in our watch and ward 
 over tongue, eye, and hand. It is only by so doing 
 that man comes to the full development of his pow- 
 ers. It is alike the duty and the birthright of man. 
 
270 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 Moderation in all things, and regulating the actions 
 only by the judgment, are the most eminent parts of 
 wisdom. " He that ruleth his own spirit is greater 
 than he that taketh a city." 
 
 " Prithee, peace! 
 I dare do all that may become a man. 
 
 Who dares do more is none." 
 
 — Shakspeare. 
 
 HOURAGE consists not in hazarding without fear, 
 but being resolutely minded in a just cause. 
 The brave man is not he who feels no fear — for 
 that were stupid and irrational — but he whose 
 noble soul subdues its fears, and bravely dares the 
 danger nature shrinks from. True courage is cool 
 and calm. The bravest of men have the least of a 
 brutal, bullying insolence, and in the very time of 
 danger are found the most serene and free. Rage 
 can make a coward forget himself and fight. But 
 what is done in fury or anger can never be placed to 
 the account of courage. 
 
 Courage enlarges, cowardice diminishes resources. 
 In desperate straits the fears of the timid aggravate 
 the dangers that imperil the brave. For cowards 
 the road of desertion should be kept open. They 
 will carry over to the enemy nothing but their fears. 
 The poltroon, like the scabbard, is an incumbrance 
 
COURAGE. 271 
 
 when once the sword is drawn. It is the same in 
 the every-day battles of life : to believe a business 
 impossible is the way to make it so. How many 
 feasible projects have miscarried through despond- 
 ency, and been strangled in the birth by a cowardly 
 imagination ! It is better to meet danger than to 
 wait for it. A ship on a lee shore stands out to sea 
 in a storm to escape shipwreck. Impossibilities, like 
 vicious dogs, fly before him who is not afraid of 
 them. Should misfortune overtake, retrench, work 
 harder ; but never fly the track. Confront difficulties 
 with unflinching perseverance. Should you then fail, 
 you will be honored ; but shrink and you will be de- 
 spised. When you put your hands to a work, let 
 the fact of your doing so constitute the evidence that 
 you mean to prosecute it to the end. They that fear 
 an overthrow are half conquered. 
 
 No one can tell who the heroes are, and who the 
 cowards, until some crisis comes to put us to the 
 test. And no crisis puts us to the test that does not 
 bring us up, alone and single-handed, to face danger. 
 It is comparatively nothing to make a rush with the 
 multitude, even into the jaws of destruction. Sheep 
 will do that. Armies can be picked from the gutters, 
 and marched up as food for powder. But when some 
 crisis singles one out from the multitude, pointing at 
 him the particular finger of fate, and telling him, 
 " Stand or run," and he faces about with steady 
 nerve, with nobody else to stand behind, we may be 
 sure the hero stuff is in him. When such crises 
 come, the true courage is just as likely to be found 
 
272 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 in people of shrinking nerves, or in weak and timid 
 women, as in great, burly people. It is a moral, not 
 a physical trait. Its seat is not in the temperament, 
 but the will. 
 
 Some people imagine that courage is confined to 
 the field of battle. There could be no greater mis- 
 take. Even contentious men — unavoidably conten- 
 tious — are not by any means limited to the battle- 
 field. And there are other struggles with adverse 
 circumstances — struggles, it may be, with habits or 
 appetites or passions — all of which require as much 
 courage and more perseverance than the brief en- 
 counter of battle. Enough to contend with, enough 
 to overcome, lies in the pathway of every individual. 
 It may be one kind of difficulties, or it may be an- 
 other, but plenty of difficulties of some kind or other 
 every one may be sure of finding through life. There 
 is but one way of looking at fate, whatever that may 
 be, whether blessings or afflictions, — to behave with 
 dignity under both. We must not lose heart, or it 
 will be the worse both for ourselves and for those 
 whom we love. To struggle, and again and again to 
 renew the conflict, — this is life's inheritance. He 
 who never falters, no matter how adverse may be the 
 circumstances, always enjoys the consciousness of a 
 perpetual spiritual triumph, of which nothing can 
 deprive him. 
 
 Though the occasions of high heroic daring sel- 
 dom occur but in the history of the great, the less 
 obtrusive opportunities for the exercise of private 
 energy are continually offering themselves. With 
 
COURAGE. 273 
 
 these domestic scenes as much abound as does the 
 tented field. Pain may be as firmly endured in the 
 lonely chamber as amid the din of arms. Difficulties 
 can be manfully combated, misfortune bravely sus- 
 tained, poverty nobly supported, disappointments 
 courageously encountered. Thus courage diffuses a 
 wide and succoring influence, and bestows energy 
 apportioned to the trial. It takes from calamity its 
 dejecting quality, and enables the soul to possess 
 itself under every vicissitude. It rescues the unhappy 
 from degradation and the feeble from contempt. 
 
 The greater part of the courage that is needed 
 in the world is not of an heroic kind. There needs 
 the common courage to be honest, the courage to 
 resist temptation, the courage to speak the truth, 
 the courage to be what we really are, and not to 
 pretend to be what we are not, the courage to live 
 honestly within our own means, and not dishonestly 
 upon the means of others. The courage that dares 
 to display itself in silent effort and endeavor, that 
 dares to endure all and suffer all for truth and duty, 
 is more truly heroic than the achievements of physi- 
 cal valor, which are rewarded by honors and titles, 
 or by laurels, sometimes steeped in blood. It is 
 moral courage that characterizes the highest order of 
 manhood and womanhood. Intellectual intrepidity is 
 one of the vital conditions of independence and self- 
 reliance of character. A man must have the courage 
 to be himself, and not the shadow or the echo of 
 another. He must exercise his own powers, think 
 
 his own thoughts, and speak his own sentiments. 
 
 18 
 
274 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 He must elaborate his own opinions, and form his 
 own convictions. 
 
 It has been said that he who dares not form an 
 opinion must be a coward ; he who will not must be 
 an idler ; he who can not must be a fool. Every 
 enlargement of the domain of knowledge which has 
 made us better acquainted with the heavens, with the 
 earth, and with ourselves, has been established by 
 the energy, the devotion, the self-sacrifice, and the 
 courage of the great spirits of past times, who, how- 
 ever much they may have been oppressed or reviled 
 by their contemporaries, now rank among those whom 
 the enlightened of the human race most delight to 
 honor. 
 
 The passive endurance of the man or woman who 
 for conscience' sake is found ready to suffer and en- 
 dure in solitude, without so much as the encourage- 
 ment of even a single sympathizing voice, is an 
 exhibition of courage of a far higher kind than that 
 displayed in the roar of battle, where even the weak- 
 est feels encouraged and inspired by the enthusiasm 
 of sympathy and the power of numbers. Time would 
 fail to tell of the names of those who through faith 
 in principles, and in the face of difficulties, dangers, 
 and sufferings, have fought a good fight in the moral 
 warfare of the world, and been content to lay down 
 their lives rather than prove false to their conscien- 
 tious convictions of the truth. 
 
 The patriot who fights an always losing battle, 
 the martyr who goes to death amid the triumphant 
 shouts of his enemies, the discoverer, like Columbus, 
 
CHARITY. 275 
 
 whose heart remains undaunted through years of 
 failure, are examples of the moral sublime which ex- 
 cites a profounder interest in the hearts of men than 
 even the most complete and conspicuous success. 
 By the side of such instances as these, how small by 
 comparison seem the greatest deeds of valor, inciting 
 men to rush upon death and die amid the frenzied 
 excitement of physical warfare. 
 
 "The primal duties shine aloft like stars, 
 The charities that soothe and heal and bless 
 Lie scattered at the feet of man like flowers." 
 
 — Wordsworth. 
 
 ISpHARITY, like the dew from heaven, falls gently 
 <^A on the drooping flowers in the stillness of night. 
 W Its refreshing and revivifying effects are felt, 
 seen, and admired. It flows from a good heart 
 and looks beyond the skies for approval and reward. 
 It never opens, but seeks to heal, the wounds in- 
 flicted by misfortune. It never harrows up, but 
 strives to calm, the troubled mind. 
 
 Charity is another name for disinterested love — 
 the humane, sympathetic feeling — that which seeks 
 the good of others ; that which would pour out from 
 the treasures of its munificence gifts of good things 
 upon all. It is that feeling that gave the world a 
 Howard, a Fenelon, a Fry. It is that feeling that 
 leads on the reformer, which inspires the philanthro- 
 
276 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 pists, which blesses, and curses not. It is the good 
 Samaritan of the heart. It is that which thinketh no 
 evil, and is kind, which hopeth all things, believeth 
 all things, endureth all things. It is the angel of 
 mercy, which forgives seventy and seven times, and 
 still is rich in the treasures of pardon. It visits the 
 sick, soothes the pillow of the dying, drops a tear 
 with the mourner, buries the dead, cares for the or- 
 phan. It delights to do offices of good to those 
 cast down, to relieve the suffering of the oppressed 
 and distressed, to proclaim the Gospel to the poor. 
 Its words are more precious than rubies ; its voice is 
 sweeter than honey ; its hand is softer than down ; 
 its step as gentle as love. 
 
 Whoever would be respected and beloved ; who- 
 ever would be useful and remembered with pleasure 
 when life is over, must cherish this virtue. Whoever 
 would be truly happy and feel the real charms of 
 goodness must cultivate this affection. It becomes, 
 if possible, more glorious when we consider the 
 number and extent of its objects. It is as wide as 
 the world of suffering, deep as the heart of sorrow, 
 extensive as the wants of creation, and boundless as 
 the kingdom of need. Its spirit is the messenger 
 of peace, holding out to quarreling humanity the flag 
 of truce. It is needed every-where, in all times and 
 places, in all trades, professions, and callings of profit 
 or honor which men can pursue. In the home life 
 there is too often a lack of charity; it should be 
 considered as a sacred duty to long and well culti- 
 vate it, to exercise it daily, and to guard well its 
 
CHARITY. 277 
 
 growth. The peace and happiness of the world de- 
 pends greatly upon it. Nothing gives a sweeter 
 charm to youth than an active charity, a disposition 
 kind to all. Who can properly estimate the powers 
 and sweetness of an active charity? 
 
 He who carries ever with him the spirit of bound- 
 less charity to man often does good when he knows 
 not of it. An influence seems to go forth from him 
 which soothes the distressed, encourages the droop- 
 ing, stimulates afresh the love of virtue, and begets 
 its own image and likeness in all beholders. With- 
 out the exercise of this grace it is impossible to make 
 domestic and social life delightful. Deeds and words 
 of conventional courtesy grown familiar are compara- 
 tively empty forms. The charitable soul carries with 
 it a charmed atmosphere of peace and love, breath- 
 ing which all who come within its benign influence 
 unfold their noblest qualities, and develop their most 
 amiable traits. Inharmonious influences are neutral- 
 ized, the harsh discipline of life is changed to whole- 
 some training, the crooked places are made straight, 
 and the rough smooth. 
 
 The uncharitable and censorious are generally 
 found among the narrow and bigoted, and those 
 who have never read the full page of their own 
 heart or been subject to various and crucial tests. 
 How can a man whose temper is phlegmatic judge 
 justly of him whose blood is fiery, whose nature is 
 tropical, and whose passions mount in an instant, 
 and as quickly subside? How can one in the seclu- 
 sion of private life accurately measure the force of 
 
278 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 the influence those are subjected to who live and act 
 in the center of vast and powerful civil and social 
 circles ? The more you mix with men the less you 
 will be disposed to quarrel, and the more charitable 
 and liberal will you become. The fact that you do 
 not understand another is quite as likely to be your 
 fault as his. There are many chances in favor of 
 the conclusion that when you feel a lack of charitable 
 feeling it is through your own ignorance and illiber- 
 ally. This will disappear as your knowledge of men 
 grows more and more complete. Hence keep your 
 heart open for every body, and be sure that you shall 
 have your reward. You will find a jewel under the 
 most uncouth exterior, and associated with comeliest 
 manners and the oddest ways and the ugliest faces 
 you will find rare virtues, fragrant little humanities, 
 and inspiring heroisms. 
 
 How glorious the thought of the universal tri- 
 umph of charity! How grand and comprehensive 
 the theme! The subject commands the profound 
 attention of good men and of angels. Under the 
 direful influence of its antagonistic principle man 
 has trampled upon the rights of fellow-man, and 
 waded through rivers of human blood, to satisfy 
 his thirst for vengeance. Its footsteps have been 
 marked with the blood of slaughtered millions. Its 
 power has shivered kingdoms and destroyed empires. 
 When men shall be brought into subjection to the 
 law of charity the angel of peace will take up its 
 abode with the children of men. Wars and rumors 
 of wars will cease. Envy and revenge will hide their 
 
CHARITY. 279 
 
 diminished heads. Falsehood and slander will be un- 
 known. Sectarian walls will crumble to dust. Then 
 this world will be transformed into a paradise, in 
 which every thing that is beautiful and lovely shall 
 grow and bloom. Disinterested and benevolent acts 
 will abound. Sorrow and disappointments will flee 
 away, and peace, sunshine, and joy will beautify and 
 adorn life. 
 
 Death always makes a beautiful appeal to charity. 
 When we look upon the dead form, so composed and 
 still, the kindness and the love that are in us all come 
 forth. The grave covers every error, buries every 
 defect, extinguishes every resentment. From its 
 peaceful bosom spring none but fond regrets and 
 tender recollections. Who can look upon the grave 
 even of an enemy and not feel a compunctious throb 
 that he should ever have warred with the poor hand- 
 ful of dust that lies moldering before him? 
 
 Charity stowed away in the heart, like rose leaves 
 in a drawer, sweetens all the daily acts of life. Little 
 drops of rain brighten the meadow ; acts of charity 
 brighten the world. We can conceive of nothine 
 more attractive than the heart when filled with the 
 spirit of charity. Certainly nothing so embellishes 
 human nature as the practice of this virtue ; a sen- 
 timent so genial and so excellent ought to be em- 
 blazoned upon every thought and act of our life. 
 This principle underlies the whole theory of Chris- 
 tianity, and in no other person do we find it more 
 happily exemplified than in the life of our Savior, 
 who, while on earth, "went about doing good." 
 
280 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 jINDNESS is the music of good-will to men, and 
 J5SB on this harp the smallest fingers in the world 
 lj may play heaven's sweetest tunes on earth. 
 Kindness is one of the purest traits that find a 
 place in the human heart. It gives us friends wher- 
 ever we may chance to wander. Whether we dwell 
 with the savage tribes of the forest or with civ- 
 ilized races, kindness is a language understood by 
 the former as well as the latter. Its influence never 
 ceases. Started once, it flows onward like the little 
 mountain rivulet in a pure and increasing stream. 
 To show kindness it is not necessary to give large 
 sums of money, or to perform some wonderful deed 
 that will immortalize your name. It is the tear 
 dropped with the mother as she weeps over the bier 
 of her departed child ; it is the word of sympathy to 
 the discouraged and the disheartened, the cup of 
 cold water and the slice of bread to the hungry one. 
 Kindness makes sunshine wherever it goes. It 
 finds it way into the hidden chambers of the heart, 
 and brings forth golden treasures, which harshness 
 would have sealed up forever. Kindness makes the 
 mother's lullaby sweeter than the song of the lark, 
 and renders the care-worn brow of the father and 
 man of business less severe in its expression. It is 
 the water of Lethe to the laborer, who straightway 
 forgets his weariness born of the burden and heat of 
 the day. Kindness is the real law of life, the link 
 
KINDNESS. 281 
 
 that connects earth with heaven, the true philoso- 
 pher's stone, for all it touches it turns into virgin 
 gold; the true gold, wherewith we purchase content- 
 ment, peace, and love. Would you live in the re- 
 membrance of others after you shall have passed 
 away ? Write your name on the tablets of their 
 hearts by acts of kindness, love, and mercy. 
 
 Kindness is an emotion of which we ought never 
 to feel ashamed. Graceful, especially in youth, is the 
 tear of sympathy and the heart that melts at the tale 
 of woe. We should not permit ease and indulgence 
 to contract our affection, and wrap us up in a selfish 
 enjoyment ; but we should accustom ourselves to 
 think of the distresses of human life and how to 
 relieve them. Think ol the solitary cottage, the 
 dying parent, and the weeping child. A tender- 
 hearted and compassionate disposition, which inclines 
 men to pity and to feel the misfortunes of others as 
 its own, is of all dispositions the most amiable, and 
 though it may not receive much honor, is worthy of 
 the highest. Kindness is the very principle of love, an 
 emanation of the heart, which softens and gladdens, 
 and should be inculcated and encouraged in all our 
 intercourse with our fellow beings. 
 
 Kindness does not consist in gifts, but in gentle- 
 ness and generosity of spirit. Men may give their 
 money, which comes from their purse, and withhold 
 their kindness, which comes from the heart. The 
 kindness which displays itself in giving money does 
 not amount to much, and often does quite as much 
 harm as good ; but the kindness of true sympathy, of 
 
282 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 thoughtful help, is never without beneficent results. 
 The good temper that displays itself in kindness must 
 not be confounded with passive goodness. It is not 
 by any means indifferent, but largely sympathetic. 
 It does not characterize the lowest, but the highest 
 classes of society. 
 
 True kindness cherishes and actively promotes all 
 reasonable instrumentalities for doing practical good 
 in its own time, and, looking into futurity, sees the 
 same spirit working on for the eventual elevation 
 and happiness of the race. It is the kindly disposed 
 men who are the active men of the world, while the 
 selfish and the skeptical, who have no love but for 
 themselves, are its idlers. How easy it is for one 
 benevolent being to diffuse pleasure around him, and 
 how truly is one fond heart a fountain of gladness, 
 making every thing in its vicinity to freshen into 
 smiles. Its effect on stern natures is like the Spring 
 rain, which melts the icy covering of the earth, and 
 causes it to open to the beams of heaven. 
 
 In the intercourse of social life it is by little acts 
 of watchful kindness recurring daily and hourly — and 
 opportunities of doing kindness if sought for are 
 constantly starting up — it is by words, by tones, by 
 gestures, by looks that affection is won and pre- 
 served. He who neglects these trifles, yet boasts 
 that, whenever a great sacrifice is called for, he shall 
 be ready to make it, will rarely be loved. The like- 
 lihood is he will not make it, and if he does, it will 
 be much rather for his own sake than for his neigh- 
 bor's. Life is made up, not of great sacrifices or 
 
KIXDXESS. 283 
 
 duties, but of little things, in which smiles and kind- 
 ness and small obligations, given habitually, are what 
 win and preserve the heart and secure comfort. The 
 little unremembered acts of kindness and of love are 
 the best portion of a good man's life. Those little 
 nameless acts which manifest themselves by tender 
 and affectionate looks and little kind acts of attention 
 do much to increase the happiness of life. 
 
 Little kindnesses are great ones. They drive 
 away sadness, and cheer up the soul beyond all 
 common appreciation. They are centers of influence 
 over others, which may accomplish much good. 
 When such kindnesses are administered in times of 
 need, they are like " apples of gold in pictures of 
 silver," and will be lone remembered. A word of 
 kindness in a desperate strait is as welcome as the 
 smile of an angel, and a helpful hand-grasp is worth 
 a hundred-fold its cost, for it may have rescued for 
 all future the most kingly thing on earth — the man- 
 hood of a ma; i. 
 
 It should not discourage us if our kindness is 
 unacknowledged : it has its influence still. Good and 
 worthy conduct may meet with an unworthy or un- 
 grateful return ; but the absence of eratitude on the 
 part of the receiver can not destroy the self-appro- 
 bation which recompenses the giver. The seeds of 
 courtesy and kindness may be scattered around with 
 so little trouble and expense that it seems strange 
 that more do not endeavor to spread them abroad. 
 Could they but know the inward peace which re- 
 quites the giver for a kindly act, even though coldly 
 
284 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 received by the one to be benefited, they would not 
 hesitate to let the kindly feelings, latent in us all, 
 have free expression. Kindly efforts are not lost. 
 Some of them will inevitably fall on good ground, and 
 grow up into benevolence in the minds of others, and 
 all of them will bear fruit of happiness in the bosom 
 whence they spring. It is better never to receive a 
 kindness than not to bestow one. Not to return a 
 benefit is the greater sin, but not to confer it is the 
 earlier. 
 
 The noblest revenge we can take upon our ene- 
 mies is to do them a kindness. To return malice for 
 malice and injury for injury will afford but a tempo- 
 rary gratification to our evil passions, and our ene- 
 mies will only be rendered more and more bitter 
 against us. But to take the first opportunity of 
 showing how superior we are to them by doing them 
 a kindness, or by rendering them a service, is not 
 only the nobler way, but the sting of reproach will 
 enter deeply into their souls, and while unto us it 
 will be a noble retaliation, our triumph will not unfre- 
 quently be rendered complete, not only by beating 
 out the malice that had otherwise stood against us, 
 but by bringing repentant hearts to offer themselves 
 at the shrine of friendship. A more glorious victory 
 can not be gained over another man than this, that 
 when the injury began on his part the kindness 
 should begin on ours. 
 
 The tongue of kindness is full of pity, love, and 
 comfort. It speaks a word of comfort to the de- 
 sponding, a word of encouragement to the faint- 
 
KINDNESS. 285 
 
 hearted, of sympathy to the bereaved, of consolation 
 to the dying. Urged on by a benevolent heart, it 
 loves to cheer, console, and invigorate the sons and 
 daughters of sorrow. Kind words do not cost much. 
 They never blister the tongue or lips, and no mental 
 trouble ever arises therefrom. Be not saving of kind 
 words and pleasing acts ; for such are fragrant gifts, 
 whose perfume will gladden the heart and sweeten 
 the life of all who hear or reeeive them. Words of 
 kindness fitly spoken are indeed both precious and 
 beautiful ; they are worth much and cost little. 
 
 Kind words are like the breath of the dew upon 
 the tender plants, falling gently upon the drooping 
 heart, refreshing its withered tendrils, and soothing 
 its woes. Bright oases are they in life's great desert. 
 Who can estimate the pangs they have alleviated, 
 or the good works they have accomplished ? Long 
 after they are uttered do they reverberate in the 
 soul's inner chamber, and, like low, sweet strains of 
 music, they serve to quell the memory of bitterness 
 or of personal wrong, to lead the heart to the sunnier 
 paths of life. And when the heart is sad, and, like a 
 broken harp, the chords of pleasure cease to vibrate, 
 how peculiarly acceptable then are kind words from 
 ot*hers ! 
 
 Who can rightly estimate the ultimate effect of 
 one kind word fitly spoken ? One little word of ten- 
 derness gushing in upon the soul will sweep long- 
 neglected chords and awaken the most pleasant 
 strains. Kind words are like jewels in the heart, 
 never to be forgotten, but perhaps to cheer by their 
 
2 5 3 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 memory a long, sad life, while words of cruelty are 
 like darts in the bosom, wounding and leaving scars 
 that will be borne to the grave by their victim. 
 Speak kindly in the morning ; it lightens all the cares 
 of the cay. and makes the household and other affairs 
 move along more smoothly. Speak kindly at night ; 
 for it may be that before dawn some loved one may 
 finish his or her space of life, and it will be too late 
 to ask forgiveness. Speak kindly at all times ; it en- 
 courages the downcast, cheers the sorrowing, and 
 very likely awakens the erring to earnest resolves to 
 do better, with strength to keep them. Always leave 
 home with kind words ; for they may be the last. 
 Kind words are the bright flowers of earthly exist- 
 ence ; use them, and especially around the fireside 
 circle. They are jewels beyond price, and powerful 
 to heal-the wounded heart, and make the weighed- 
 down spirit glad. 
 
 SE5EX0LE>"€E. 
 
 :OIXG good is the only certain happy action of 
 a man's life. The verv consciousness of well- 
 doing is in itself ample reward for the trouble 
 we have been put to. The enjoyment ci be- 
 nevolent acts grows upon reflection. Experience 
 teaches this so truly, that never did any soul do good 
 but he came readier to do the same again with more 
 enjoyment. Never was love or gratitude or bounty 
 
 
BENEVOLENCE. 287 
 
 practiced but with increasing joy, which made the 
 practicer more in love with the fair act. 
 
 If there be a pleasure on earth which angels can 
 not enjoy, and which they might almost envy man the 
 possession of, it is the power of relieving distress. 
 If there be a pain which devils might almost pity man 
 for enduring, it is the death-bed reflection that we 
 have possessed the power of doing good, but that we 
 have abused and perverted it to purposed ill. He 
 who has never denied himself for the sake of giving 
 has but glanced at the joys of benevolence. We 
 owe our superfluity, and to be happy in the perform- 
 ance of our duty we must exceed it. The joy result- 
 ing from the diffusion of blessings to all around us is 
 the purest and sublimest that can ever enter the hu- 
 man mind, and can be understood only by those who 
 have experienced it. Next to the consolation of 
 divine grace it is the most sovereign balm to the 
 miseries of life, both in him who is the object of it, 
 and in him who exercises it. 
 
 In all other human gifts and possessions, though 
 they advance nature, yet they are subject to excess. 
 For so we see, that by aspiring to be like God in 
 power, the angels transgressed and fell ; by aspiring 
 to be like God in knowledge man transgressed and 
 fell ; but by aspiring to be like God in goodness or 
 love neither man nor angels ever did or shall trans- 
 gress, for unto that imitation we are called. A life 
 of passionate gratification is not to be compared with a 
 life of active benevolence. God has so constituted our 
 natures that a man can not be happy unless he is or 
 
288 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 thinks he is a means of doing good. We can not 
 conceive of a picture of more unutterable wretched- 
 ness than is furnished by one who knows that he is 
 wholly useless in the world. 
 
 A man or woman without benevolence is not a 
 perfect being ; they are only a deformed personality 
 of true manhood or womanhood. In every heart 
 there are many tendencies to selfishness ; but the 
 spirit of benevolence counteracts them all. In a 
 world like this, where we are all so needy and de- 
 pendent, where our interests are so interlocked, where 
 our lives and hearts overlap each other and often grow 
 together, we can not live without a good degree of 
 benevolence. We do most for ourselves when we do 
 most for others ; hence our highest interests, even 
 from a purely selfish point of view, are in the paths 
 of benevolence. And in a moral sense we know 
 "that it is more blessed to give than to receive." 
 Good deeds double in the doing, and the larger half 
 comes back to the donor. A large heart of charity 
 is a noble thing, and the most benevolent soul lives 
 nearest to God. Selfishness is the root of evil ; be- 
 nevolence is its cure. In no heart is benevolence more 
 beautiful than in youth ; in no heart is selfishness 
 more ugly. To do good is noble ; to be good is more 
 noble. This should be the aim of all the young. The 
 poor and the needy should occupy a large place in 
 their hearts. The sick and suffering should claim 
 their attention. The sinful and criminal should 
 awaken their deepest pity. The oppressed and down- 
 trodden should find a large place in their compassion. 
 
BENEVOLENCE. 289 
 
 Woman appears in her best estate in the exercise 
 of benevolent deeds. How sweet are her soothing 
 words to the disconsolate ! How consoling her tears 
 of sympathy to the mourning ! How fresh her spirit 
 of hope to the discouraged ! How balmy the breath 
 of her love to the oppressed! Man, too, appears in 
 his best light and grandest aspect when he appears as 
 the practical follower of Him who went about doing 
 good. He who does these works of practical benevo- 
 lence is educating his moral powers in the school of 
 earnest and glorious life. He is laying the founda- 
 tion for a noble and useful career. He is planting the 
 seeds of a charity that will grow to bless and save 
 the sufferings of our fellow-men. 
 
 Liberality consists less in giving profusely than 
 in giving judiciously, for there is nothing that re- 
 quires so strict an economy as our benevolence. 
 Liberality, if spread over too large a surface, pro- 
 duces no crop. If over one too small it exuberates 
 in rankness and in weeds. And yet it requires care 
 to avoid the other extreme. It is better to be some- 
 times mistaken than not to exercise charity at all. 
 Though we may chance sometimes to bestow our 
 beneficence on the unworthy it does not take from 
 the merit of the act. It is not the true spirit of 
 charity which is ever rigid and circumspect, and 
 which always mistrusts the truth of the necessities 
 laid open to it. Be not frightened at the hard word, 
 "impostor." "Cast thy bread upon the waters." 
 Some have unawares entertained angels. 
 
 A man should fear when he enjoys only what 
 
 19 
 
290 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 good he does publicly, lest it should prove to be 
 the publicity rather than the charity that he loves. 
 We have more confidence in that benevolence which 
 begins in the home and diverges into a large human- 
 ity than in the world-wide philanthropy which begins 
 at the outside and converges into egotism. A man 
 should, indeed, have a generous feeling for the wel- 
 fare of the whole world, and should live in the world 
 as a citizen of the world. But he may have a pref- 
 erence for that particular part in which he lives. 
 Chanty begins at home, but it may and ought to go 
 abroad ; still we have no respect for self-boasting 
 charity which neglects all objects of commiseration 
 near and around it, but goes to the end of the 
 world in search of misery for the sake of talking 
 about it. 
 
 Generosity during life is a very different thing 
 from generosity in the hour of death. One proceeds 
 from genuine liberality and benevolence ; the other 
 from pride or fear. He that will not permit his 
 wealth to do any good to others while he is living 
 prevents it from doing any good to himself when he 
 is gone. By an egotism that is suicidal and has a 
 double edge he cuts himself off from the truest 
 pleasures here, and the highest pleasures hereafter. 
 To pass a whole life-time without performing a single 
 generous action till the dying hour, when death un- 
 locks the grasp upon earthly possessions, is to live 
 like the Talipat palm-tree of the East, which blossoms 
 not till the last year of its life. It then suddenly 
 bursts into a mass of flowers, but emits such an 
 
BENEVOLENCE. 291 
 
 odor that the tree is frequently cut down to be rid 
 of it. Even such is the life of those who postpone 
 their munificence until the close of their days, when 
 they exhibit a late efflorescence of generosity, which 
 lacks the sweet-smelling perfume which good deeds 
 should possess. And when it appears, like the Tal- 
 ipat flower, it is a sure sign that death is at hand. 
 They surrender every thing when they see they can 
 not continue to keep possession, and are at last liberal 
 when they can no longer be parsimonious. The truly 
 generous man does not wish to leave enough to build 
 an imposing monument, since there is so much sor- 
 row and suffering to be alleviated. They enjoy the 
 pleasure of what they give by giving it when alive 
 and seeing others benefited thereby. 
 
 A conqueror is regarded with awe, the wise man 
 commands our esteem, but it is the benevolent man 
 who wins our affection. A beneficent person is like 
 a fountain watering the earth and spreading fertility ; 
 it is, therefore, more delightful and more honorable 
 to give than to receive. The last, best fruit which 
 comes to late perfection, even in the kindliest soul, 
 is tenderness towards the hard, forbearance towards 
 the unforbearant, warmth of heart towards the cold, 
 philanthropy towards the misanthropic. 
 
292 GOLDEX GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 X%g&&Oti%. 
 
 ^ERACITY, or the habitual observance of truth, 
 is a bright and shining quality on the part of 
 any one who strives to make the most of life's 
 possibilities. It irradiates all of his surround- 
 ings, making plain the path of duty, and hence the 
 path which leads to the most enduring success. It is 
 the bond of union and the basis of human happiness. 
 Without this virtue, there is no reliance upon lan- 
 guage, no confidence in friendship, no security in 
 promises and oaths. 
 
 Truth is always consistent with itself, and needs 
 nothing to help it out. It is always near at hand, 
 and sits upon our lips, and is ready to drop out be- 
 fore we are aware ; whereas a lie is troublesome, and 
 sets a man's invention upon the rack ; and one trick 
 needs manv more to make it good. It is dangerous 
 to deviate far from the strict rule of veracity, even 
 on the most trifling occasions. However guileless 
 may be our intentions, the habit, if indulged, may 
 take root, and gain on us under the cover of various 
 pretenses, till it usurps a leading influence. Nothing 
 appears so low and mean as lying and dissimulation; 
 and it is observable that only weak animals endeavor 
 to supply by craft the defects of strength which 
 nature has given them. Dissimulation in youth is the 
 forerunner of perfidy in old age. Its first appearance 
 is the fatal omen of growing depravity and future 
 shame. It degrades parts and learning, obscures 
 
VERACITY. 293 
 
 the luster of every accomplishment, and sinks us into 
 contempt. 
 
 The path of falsehood is a perplexing maze. After 
 the first departure from sincerity, it is not in our 
 power to stop. One artifice unavoidably leads on to 
 another, till, as the intricacies of the labyrinth in- 
 crease, we are left entangled in our snare. False- 
 hood is difficult to be maintained. When the mate- 
 rials of a building are solid stone, very rude architec- 
 ture will suffice ; but a structure of rotten materials 
 needs the most careful adjustment to make it stand 
 at all. The love of truth and right is the grand 
 spring source of integrity. The study of truth is 
 perpetually joined with the love of virtue. For 
 there is no virtue which derives not its original from 
 truth ; as, on the contrary, there is no vice which has 
 not its beginning in a lie. Truth is the foundation 
 of all knowledge and the cement of all society. 
 
 Strict veracity requires something more than 
 merely the speaking of truth. There are lying looks 
 as well as lying words ; dissembling smiles, deceiving 
 signs, and even a lying silence. Not to intend what 
 you speak is to give your heart the lie with your 
 tongue ; and not to perform what you promise is to 
 give your tongue the lie with your actions. Decep- 
 tion exhibits itself in many forms — in reticency on 
 the one hand or exaggeration on the other ; in dis- 
 guise or concealment ; in pretended concurrence in 
 others' opinions ; in assuming an attitude of conform- 
 ity which is deceptive ; in making promises, or in 
 allowing them to be implied, which are never intended 
 
294 GOLDEN OEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 to be performed ; or even in refraining from speaking 
 the truth when to do so is a duty. There are also 
 those who are all things to all men, who say one 
 thing and do another. But those who are essentially 
 insincere fail to evoke confidence, and, in the end, 
 discover that they have only deceived themselves 
 while thinking they were deceiving others. 
 
 Lying is in some cases the offspring of perversity 
 and vice, and in many others of sheer moral coward- 
 ice. Plutarch calls lying the vice of a slave. There 
 is no vice, says Lord Bacon, that so covers a man 
 with shame as to be found false and perfidious. 
 Every lie, great or small, is the brink of a precipice, 
 the depth of which nothing but Omniscience can 
 fathom. Denying a fault always doubles it. All 
 that a man can get by lying and dissembling is that 
 he will not be believed when he speaks the truth. A 
 liar is subject to two misfortunes, neither to believe 
 nor to be believed. If falsehood, says Montaigne, 
 like truth, had but one face, we should be upon bet- 
 ter terms ; for we should then take the contrary of 
 what the liar says for certain truth. 
 
 We are not called upon to speak all that we 
 know; that would be folly. But what a man says 
 should be what he thinks ; otherwise it is knavery. 
 No wrong is ever made better, but always worse, by 
 a falsehood. Even when detection does not follow, 
 suspicion is always created. Wrong is but falsehood 
 put in practice. The Chinese have a proverb which 
 says, " A lie has no legs, and can not stand ;" but it 
 has wings and can fly far and wide. You never can 
 
VERACITY. 295 
 
 unite, though you may try ever so hard, the antag- 
 onistic elements of truth and falsehood. The man 
 who forgets a great deal that has happened has a 
 better memory than he who remembers a great deal 
 that never happened. 
 
 After all, the most natural beauty in the world is 
 honesty and moral truth ; for all beauty is truth. 
 True features make the beauty of a face, and true 
 proportions the beauty of architecture, as true meas- 
 ure that of harmony and music. In poetry, truth 
 still is the perfection. Fiction must be governed by 
 truth, and can only please by its resemblance to 
 truth. The appearance of reality is necessary to 
 agreeably represent any passion, and to be able to 
 move others we must be moved ourselves, or at least 
 seem to be so upon some probable ground. False- 
 hood itself is never so susceptible as when she baits 
 her hook with truth, and no opinions so fatally mis- 
 lead us as those that are not wholly wrong. No 
 watch so effectually deceives the wearer as those 
 that are sometimes right. 
 
 Such are the imperfections of mankind that the 
 duplicities, the temptations, and the infirmities that 
 surround us have rendered the truth, and nothing: 
 but the truth, as hazardous and contraband a com- 
 modity as a man can possibly deal in. Colton says 
 that "pure truth, like pure gold, has been found 
 unfit for circulation;" and another has said, "It is 
 dangerous to follow truth too near lest she should 
 kick out your teeth." The trouble consists not in 
 obeying the behests of strict veracity, but in lack 
 
296 G OLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 of prudence and ordinary caution. While all we tell 
 should be the truth, it is not always necessary to 
 tell all the truth, unless the other one have a right 
 to know. Silence is always an alternative with truth. 
 Remember that the silken cords of love must ever 
 be linked with those of truth ; otherwise they will 
 but gall and irritate, instead of guiding into paths of 
 rectitude. 
 
 Mil MAN of honor ! What a glorious title is that ! 
 <s ^§pp Who would not rather have it than any that 
 flf kings can bestow? It is worth all the gold 
 and silver in the world. He who merits it 
 wears a jewel within his soul and needs none upon 
 his bosom. "His word is as good as his bond," and 
 if there were no law in the land one might deal just 
 as safely with him. To take unfair advantage is not 
 in him. To quibble and guard his speech so that he 
 leads others to suppose that he means something 
 that he does not mean, even while they can never 
 prove that it is so, would be impossible to his frank 
 nature. His speeches are never riddles. He looks 
 you in the eye and says straight out the things he 
 has to say, and he does unto others the things he 
 would that they should do to him. 
 
 He is a good son and a good brother. Who 
 ever heard him betray the faults and follies of his 
 
HONOR. 297 
 
 near kindred? And with his friends he proves him- 
 self true, and will not betray the trust friendship 
 imposes on him. And with strangers you do not 
 find him too curious about the affairs of others, or 
 too eager to impart information accidentally gleaned 
 by him. Real honor and esteem are not difficult to 
 be obtained in the world. They are best won by 
 actual worth and merit rather than by art and in- 
 trigue, which runs a long and ruinous race, and 
 seldom seizes upon the prize at last. Clear and 
 round dealing is the honor of man's nature, and 
 mixture of falsehood is like alloy in coin of gold 
 and silver, which may make the metal work the 
 better, but it embaseth it. 
 
 Honor, like reputation and character, displays 
 itself in little acts. It is of slow growth. Anciently 
 the Romans worshiped virtue and honor as gods; 
 they built two temples, which were so seated that 
 none could enter the temple of honor without pass- 
 ing through the temple of virtue, thus symbolizing 
 the truth that all honor is founded on virtue. He 
 whose soul is set to do right finds himself more 
 firmly bound by the principle of honor than by legal 
 restraints — much more at ease when bound by the 
 law than when bound by his conscience. He who is 
 actuated by false principles of honor does not feel 
 thus. True honor is internal, false honor external. 
 The one is founded on principles, the other on inter- 
 ests. The one does not ostentatiously proclaim its 
 lofty aims ; it prefers that its conduct and actions 
 demonstrate its purposes. He who is moved by 
 
298 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 false honor is costantly worried lest some one should 
 doubt that he was a man of honor. He is so busily- 
 engaged in sustaining his reputation against fancied 
 attacks on his honor that he finds but little time to 
 devote to the exercise of those acts which a fine 
 sense of honor would impel him to do. Such a one 
 may be a libertine, penurious, proud — may insult 
 his inferiors and defraud his creditors — but it is im- 
 possible for one possessed of true honor to be any 
 of these. 
 
 Honor and virtue are not the same, though true 
 honor is always founded on virtue. Honor may take 
 her tones and texture from the prevailing manners 
 and customs of those around us ; this renders her 
 vacillating unless allied to virtue, which is the same 
 in both hemispheres, yesterday as to-day. When 
 honor is not founded on virtue she becomes essen- 
 tially selfish in design, and is unworthy of her name. 
 She is then unstable and seldom the same, for she 
 feeds upon opinion, and will be as fickle as her food. 
 She builds a lofty structure on the sandy foundation 
 of the esteem of those who are, of all beings, the 
 most subject to change. Combined with virtue she 
 is uniform and fixed, because she looks for approba- 
 tion only from Him who is the same at all times. 
 Honor by herself is capricious in her rewards. She 
 feeds us upon air, and often pulls down our house 
 to build our monument. She is contracted in her 
 views, inasmuch as her hopes are rooted on to earth, 
 bounded by time, and terminated by death. But, 
 when directed by virtue, her hopes become enlarged 
 
policy. 299 
 
 and magnified, inasmuch as they extend beyond pres- 
 ent things — even to things eternal. In the storms 
 and tempests of life mere honor is not to be de- 
 pended on, because she herself partakes of the tu- 
 mult; she also is buffeted by the waves and borne 
 along by the whirlwind. But virtue is above the 
 storm, and gives to honor a sure and steadfast 
 anchor, since it is cast into heaven. 
 
 £OM6Tf. 
 
 |HAT is called policy is sometimes spoken of in 
 the same sense as prudence, but its nature is 
 cunning. It is a thing of many aspects and 
 of many tongues ; it can appear in any form and 
 speak in any language. It is sometimes called man- 
 agement, but is not worthy of that good name, inas- 
 much as it is but a compound of sagacity and deceit, 
 of duplicity and of meanness. It puts on the sem- 
 blance of kindness and concern for your good, but its 
 heart is treachery and selfishness. 
 
 This principle, strange as it may seem, is of very 
 extensive influence. It is adopted and acted upon by 
 multitudes, who claim to be respectable and intelligent 
 men, and is not confined to the few or those of the 
 baser sort. Its devotees may not be aware that this 
 is their ruling principle of action. They mistake its 
 meaning by giving it a wrong name. They call it 
 prudence, discretion, wisdom. Alas ! it is not guided 
 
300 GOLDEN OEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 by the high principles of integrity, which beautify 
 and adorn those noble attributes of perfect manhood. 
 Its appropriate name is policy, the sister of cunning, 
 the child of deception and duplicity. 
 
 This principle of double dealing, of artful accom- 
 modation and management, is eminently characteristic 
 of the present age. Its meets every man on his 
 blind side, and by stratagem makes a tool of him to 
 accomplish its own wily and selfish purposes. If he 
 is weak, it deceives him by its artifices ; if he is 
 vain, it puffs up his vanity by flattery ; if he is 
 avaricious, it allures him with the prospect of gain ; 
 if he is ambitious, it promises him promotion; if he 
 is timid, it threatens him. Its leading maxim is, 
 "The end justifies the means," and, in pursuing its 
 end, it sticks at nothing that promises success. It 
 may be traced in all departments of business and 
 through all grades of society, from the grand coun- 
 cils of the nation to the little town or parish meet- 
 ing. Instead of acting in open daylight, pursuing the 
 direct and straightforward path of rectitude and duty, 
 you see men extensively putting on false appearances, 
 working in the dark, and carrying their plans by 
 stratagem and deceit; nothing open, nothing direct 
 and honest ; one thing is said, and another thing is 
 meant. When you look for a man in one place, you 
 find him in another. With flattering lips and a 
 double heart do they speak. Their language and 
 conduct do not proceed from fixed principles and 
 open-hearted sincerity, but from a spirit of duplicity 
 and selfish policy. 
 
POLICY. 301 
 
 Prudence, caution, and business management are 
 not only a necessity, but are commended as the price 
 of success in worldly affairs. They have the sanction 
 of our best judgment, and offend no moral sense of 
 right. But against mere policy every young man who 
 has any desire of lasting respectability and influence 
 ought most carefully be on his guard. Nothing can 
 be more fatal to reputation and success in life than to 
 acquire the character of an artful intriguer, one who 
 does all things with the ulterior design of furthering 
 his own ends. He may succeed for a time ; but he 
 will soon be found out, and when found out will be 
 despised. He who acts on this principle thinks that 
 nobody knows it ; but he is wretchedly mistaken. 
 The thin disguise that is thrown over the inner man 
 is soon seen through by every one, and while he prides 
 himself on being very wise and keeping his designs 
 out of sight, all persons of the least discernment 
 perfectly understand him, and despise him for think- 
 ing he could make fools of them. 
 
 People often mistake policy for discretion. There 
 is a wide difference between the two traits. Policy 
 is only the mimic of discretion, but may pass current 
 with the mass in the same manner as vivacity is often 
 mistaken for wit and gravity for wisdom. Policy has 
 only private, selfish aims, and stops at nothing which 
 may render these successful. Discretion has large 
 and extended views, and, like a well-formed eye, 
 commands a wide horizon. Policy is a kind of short 
 insight that discovers the minutest objects that are 
 close at hand, but is not able to discover things at a 
 
302 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 distance. The whole power of policy is private ; to 
 say nothing and to do nothing is the utmost of its 
 reach. Yet men thus narrow by nature and mean 
 by art are sometimes able to rise by the miscarriage 
 of bravery and openness of integrity, and, watching 
 failures and snatching opportunities, obtain advan- 
 tages which belong to higher characters. 
 
 The observant man will not calculate any essential 
 difference from mere appearances. The light laughter 
 that bubbles on the lips, often mantles over brackish 
 depths of sadness, and the serious look may be the 
 sober veil that covers a divine peace. The bosom 
 may ache beneath diamond broches, or a blithe heart 
 dance under coarse wool sacks. By a kind of fash- 
 ionable discipline the eye is taught to brighten, the 
 lip to smile, and the whole countenance to emanate 
 the semblance of friendly welcome, while the bosom 
 is unwarmed by a single spark of genuine kindness 
 and good-will. Grief and anxiety lie hidden under 
 the golden robes of prosperity, and the gloom of 
 calamity is often cheered by the secret radiations of 
 hope and comfort, as in the works of nature the bog 
 is sometimes covered with flowers and the mine con- 
 cealed in barren crags. Beware, so long as you live, 
 of judging men by the outward appearance. 
 
 But nothing feigned or violent can last long. Life 
 becomes manifest. It will declare itself, and at last 
 the worthless disguises are worn off. Hence, the 
 lesson that the wise man should learn is to guard 
 against mere appearances in others, but for himself 
 to pursue the straightforward, open course, and in a 
 
EGOTISM. 303 
 
 world of deceit and intrigue show himself a man that 
 can be relied on. Thus will his life be influential for 
 good, and after he is gone his memory will be revered 
 as that of an upright man. 
 
 i|jHHERE is one quality which brings to its pos- 
 ,?—*« sessor naught but ridicule, or, what is still 
 tj worse, positive dislike : it is sometimes called 
 self-conceit, but more commonly and more for- 
 cibly expressed by egotism. 
 
 Egotism and skepticism are always miserable com- 
 panions in life, and are especially unlovable in youth. 
 The egotist is next door to a fanatic. Constantly 
 occupied with self, he has no thoughts to spare for 
 others. He refers to himself in all things, thinks of 
 himself, and studies himself, until his own little self 
 becomes his ruling principle of action. The pests 
 of society are egotists. There are some men whose 
 opposition can be reckoned upon against every thing 
 that has not emanated from themselves. He that 
 falls in love with himself will have no rivals. The 
 egotist's code is, Every thing for himself, nothing for 
 others. Hence it is by reason of their selfishness 
 that they find the world so ugly, because they can 
 only see themselves in it. 
 
 An egotist is seldom a man of brilliant parts. A 
 talented or sensible man is apt to drop ont of his 
 
304 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 narration every allusion to himself. He is content with 
 putting his theme on its own ground. You shall not 
 tell me you have learned to know most men. Your 
 saying so disproves it. You shall not tell me by 
 their titles what books you have read. You shall 
 not tell me your house is the best and your pictures 
 the finest. You shall make me feel it. I am not 
 to infer it from your conversation. It is a false 
 principle, because we are entirely occupied with our- 
 selves, we must equally occupy the thoughts of 
 others. The contrary inference is but the fair one. 
 We are such hypocrites that whatever we talk of 
 ourselves, though our words may sound humble, our 
 hearts are nearly always proud. When all is summed 
 up, a man never speaks of himself without loss ; his 
 accusation of himself is always believed, his praises 
 never. This love of talking of self is a disease that, 
 like influenza, falls on all constitutions. It is allow- 
 able to speak of yourself, provided you do not con- 
 tinually advance new arguments in your favor. But 
 abuse of self is nearly as bad, since we can not help 
 suspecting that those who abuse themselves are, in 
 reality, angling for approbation. 
 
 Ofttimes we dislike egotism in others simply be- 
 cause of our own. We feel it a slight, when we are 
 by, that one should talk of himself, or seek to enter- 
 tain us with his own interests instead of asking us 
 ours. He who thinks he can find in himself the 
 means of doing without others is much mistaken. 
 But he who thinks others can not do without him is 
 still more mistaken. Conceit is the most contempt- 
 
EGOTISM. 305 
 
 ible and one of the most odious qualities in the 
 world. It is vanity drawn from all other shifts, and 
 forced to appeal to itself for admiration. It is to 
 nature what paint is to beauty ; it is not only need- 
 less, but it impairs what it would improve. He who 
 gives himself airs of importance exhibits the creden- 
 tials of impotence. He that fancies himself very 
 enlightened because he sees the deficiency of others 
 may be very ignorant because he has not studied his 
 own. In the same degree as we overrate ourselves 
 we shall underrate others ; for injustice allowed at 
 home is not likely to be corrected abroad. 
 
 It is this unquiet love of self that renders us 
 so sensitive. It is an instrument useful, but danger- 
 ous. It often wounds the hand that makes use of it, 
 and seldom does good without doing harm. The 
 sick man who sleeps ill thinks the night long. We 
 exaggerate all the evils which we encounter ; they 
 are great, but our sensibility increases them. Man 
 should not prize himself by what he has ; neither 
 should others prize him by what he professes to have, 
 or what he by vigorous talk constantly lays claim to 
 possess. We should seek the more valuable qualities 
 which lie hidden in his true self. He mistakes who 
 values a jewel by its golden frame, or a book by its 
 silver clasps, or a man by reason of his estates or 
 profession. 
 
 The true measure of success always lies between 
 
 two extremes. Egotism and overweening self-conceit 
 
 are indeed deplorable blemishes in any character ; 
 
 but we, perhaps, forget that he who is totally desti- 
 
 20 
 
306 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 tute of them presents but a sorry figure in the world's 
 battle-field. He lacks individuality, and lacks the 
 courage to push forward his own interests. In this 
 aggressive age it will not do to be destitute of a right 
 degree of self-confidence. Lacking this, men are too 
 often deterred from taking that position for which 
 their talents eminently fit them, and at last have only 
 vain regrets as they contemplate life's failures. Ego- 
 tism is as distinct and separate from a manly self- 
 confidence in one's own powers as the unsightly block 
 of marble is to the finished statuette, which consists, 
 indeed, of the same materials as the former, but so 
 softened and modified as to be an object of admira- 
 tion to all. Nor is it difficult to draw the dividing 
 lines. Egotism exultingly proclaims to all, " Look at 
 me. What strength, what ability, what talents are 
 mine! Who so graceful ? who so gifted? who so 
 competent to be placed in position of honor or au- 
 thority as I ? I am sure of success. Behold my 
 triumph!" The man who is withal modest, yet feels 
 that he possesses acquisitions and gifts, says: "True, 
 the way is long, the time discouraging, but what has 
 been done can be done. I can but make the effort, 
 and go forward to the best of my ability ; and if so 
 be I fail, with a brave heart and a cheerful face I will 
 do what duty points out ; but if success crowns my 
 efforts, I will so use my advantages that all may be 
 benefited." 
 
VANITY. 307 
 
 wrai& 
 
 ffipHERE is no vice or folly that requires so much 
 ' nicety and skill to manage as vanity, nor any 
 which, by ill-management, makes so contempt- 
 ible a figure. The desire of being thought 
 wise is often a hindrance to being so, for such a 
 one is often more desirous of letting the world see 
 what knowledge he hath than to learn of others that 
 which he wants. Men are more apt to be vain on 
 account of those qualities which they fondly believe 
 they have than of those which they really possess. 
 Some would be thought to do great things who are 
 but tools or instruments, like the fool who fancied 
 he played upon the organ when he only blew the 
 bellows. 
 
 Be not so greedy of popular applause as to for- 
 get that the same breath which blows up a fire may 
 blow it out again. Vanity, like laudanum and other 
 poisonous medicines, is beneficial in small, though 
 injurious in large, quantities. Be not vain of your 
 want of vanity. When you hear the phrase, "I may 
 say without vanity," you may be sure some charac- 
 teristic vanity will follow in the same breath. The 
 most worthless things are sometimes most esteemed. 
 It is not all the world that can pull an humble man 
 down, because God will exalt him. Nor is it all the 
 world that can keep a proud man up, because God 
 will debase him. 
 
 Vanity feeds voraciously and abundantly on the 
 
308 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 richest food that can be served up, or can live on 
 less and meaner diet than any thing of which we 
 can form a conception. The rich and the poor, 
 learned and ignorant, strong and weak, — all have 
 a share in vanity. The humblest Christian is not 
 free from it, and when he is most humble the devil 
 will flatter his vanity by telling him of it. On the 
 other hand, it is with equal relish that it feeds upon 
 vulgarity, coarseness, and fulsome eccentricity, — 
 every thing, in short, by which a person can at- 
 tract attention. It often takes liberality by the hand, 
 prompts advice, administers reproof, and sometimes 
 perches visibly and gayly on the prayers and sermons 
 in the pulpit. It is an ever-present principle of hu- 
 man nature — a wen on the heart of man ; less painful, 
 but equally loathsome as a cancer. It is of all others 
 the most baseless propensity. 
 
 O vanity, how little is thy force acknowledged or 
 thine operations discerned ! How wantonly dost thou 
 deceive mankind under different disguises! Some- 
 times thou dost wear the face of pity ; sometimes of 
 generosity; nay, thou hast the assurance to put on 
 the robes of religion and the glorious ornaments that 
 belong only to heroic virtue. Vanity is the fruit of 
 ignorance. It thrives most in those places never 
 reached by the air of heaven or the light of the 
 sun. It is a deceitful sweetness, a fruitless labor, a 
 perpetual fear, a dangerous honor ; her beginning is 
 without providence, but her end not without repent- 
 ance. Vanity is so constantly solicitous of self that 
 even where its own claims are not interested it indi- 
 
VANITY. 309 
 
 rectly seeks the aliment which it loves by showing 
 how little is deserved by others. 
 
 Charms which, like flowers, lie on the surface — 
 such as preserve figure and dress — conduce to vanity. 
 On the contrary, those excellencies which lie down, 
 like gold, and are discovered with difficulty — such as 
 profoundnesss of intellect and morality — leave their 
 possessors modest and humble. Vanity ceases to be 
 'blameless, even if it is not ennobled, when it is di- 
 rected to laudable objects, when it prompts us to 
 great and generous actions. Vanity is, indeed, the 
 poison of agreeableness, yet even a poison, when 
 skillfully employed, has a salutary effect in medicine ; 
 so has vanity in the commerce and society of the 
 world. 
 
 Some intermixture of vainglorious tempers puts 
 life into business, and makes a fit composition for 
 grand enterprises and hazardous endeavors ; for men 
 of solid and sober natures have more of the ballast 
 than the sail. Vanity is, in one sense, the antidote 
 to conceit, for, while the former makes us all nerve 
 to the opinions of others, the latter is perfectly satis- 
 fied with its opinion of itself. A vain man can not 
 be altogether rude. Desirous as he is of pleasing he 
 fashions his manners after those of others. There- 
 fore, let us give vanity fair quarter wherever we 
 meet with it, being persuaded that it is often pro- 
 ductive of good to its possessor, and to others who 
 are within its sphere of action. 
 
 Vanity pervades the whole human family to a 
 greater or less degree, as the atmosphere does the 
 
310 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 globe. It is so anchored in the heart of man that 
 not only in the lower walks of life but in the higher 
 all wish to have their admirers. Those who write 
 against it wish to have the glory of writing well, and 
 those who read it wish the glory of reading well. 
 Vanity calculates but poorly on the vanity of others. 
 What a virtue we should distill from frailty; what a 
 world of pain we would save our brethren, if we 
 would suffer our weakness to be the measure of 
 theirs ! 
 
 We would rather contend with pride than vanity, 
 because pride has a stand-up way of fighting. You 
 know where it is. It throws its black shadow on 
 you, and you are not at a loss where to strike. 
 But vanity is such a delusive and multified failing 
 that men who fight vanities are like men who fight 
 midgets and butterflies. It is much easier to chase 
 them than to hit them. Vanity may be likened to 
 the mouse nibbling about in the expectation of a 
 crumb ; while pride is apt to be like the butcher's 
 dog, who carries off your steak and growls at you 
 as he goes. Pride is never more offensive than 
 when it condescends to be civil; whereas vanity, 
 whenever it forgets itself, naturally assumes good 
 humor. 
 
 Extinguish vanity in the mind and you naturally 
 retrench the little superfluities of garniture and equi- 
 page. The flowers will fall of themselves when the 
 root that nourishes them is destroyed. We have 
 nothing of which we should be vain, but much to in- 
 duce humility. If we have any good qualities they 
 
SELFISHNESS. 311 
 
 are the gift of God. Let every one guard against 
 this all-pervading principle, and teach their children 
 that it is the shadow of a shade. 
 
 gfe 
 
 ^Egl?*^??. 
 
 pjlfHERE is nothing in the world so malignant and 
 e OT R> destructive in its nature and tendency as selfish- 
 W ness. It has done all the mischief of the past, 
 and is destined to do all the mischief of the 
 unseen future. It has destroyed the temporal and 
 eternal interests of millions in times past, and it is 
 morally certain that it will destroy the interests of 
 millions yet to come. It is the source of all the sins 
 of omission and commission which are found in the 
 world. We shall not see a wrong take place but that 
 the actor is moved by his own private, personal, and 
 selfish nature. 
 
 Selfishness is a vice utterly at variance with the 
 happiness of him who harbors it, for the selfish man 
 suffers more from his selfishness than he from whom 
 that selfishness withholds some important benefit. He 
 that sympathizes in all the happiness of others per- 
 haps himself enjoys the safest happiness, and he who 
 is warned by all the folly of others has perhaps at- 
 tained the soundest wisdom. But such is the blind- 
 ness and suicidal selfishness of mankind that things 
 so desirable are seldom pursued, things so accessible 
 seldom attained. The selfish person lives as if the 
 
312 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 world were made altogether for him, and not he for 
 the world; to take in every thing, and part with 
 nothing. 
 
 Selfishness contracts and narrows our benevolence, 
 and causes us, like serpents, to infold ourselves within 
 ourselves, and to turn out our stings to all the world 
 besides. As frost to the bud and blight to the blos- 
 som, even such is self-interest to friendship, for confi- 
 dence can not dwell where selfishness is porter at the 
 gate. The essence of true nobility is neglect of self. 
 Let the thought of self pass in, and the beauty of a 
 great action is gone, like the bloom from a soiled 
 flower. Selfishness is the bane of all life. It can 
 not enter into any life — individual, family, or social — 
 without cursing it. It maintains its ground by tenac- 
 ity and contention, and engenders strife and discord 
 where all before was peace and harmony. 
 
 Few sins in the world are punished more con- 
 stantly or more certainly than that of selfishness. It 
 dwarfs all the better nature of man. It takes from 
 him that feeling of kindly sympathy for others' good, 
 which is one of the most pleasing traits of manhood, 
 and in its stead sets up self as the one whose good is 
 to be chiefly sought. It makes self the vortex in- 
 stead of the fountain, so that, instead of throwing 
 out, he learns only to draw in. These withering 
 effects are to be seen not only in the high roads and 
 public places of life, but in the nooks and by-lanes as 
 well. Not alone among conquerors and kings, but 
 among the humble and obscure ; in the dissembling 
 artifices of trade ; in the unsanctified lust of wealth ; 
 
SELFISHNESS. 313 
 
 in the devoted pursuit of station and power ; confed- 
 erated with the worst feelings and most depraved 
 designs. 
 
 In proportion as we contract and curtail our feel- 
 ings, so do we confine and limit our minds. If all our 
 thoughts, plans, and purposes tend only to the ad- 
 vancement of self, we may be sure they will become 
 as insignificant as their object, and instead of em- 
 bracing in their scope the welfare of many, rendering 
 us an object of endearment to others, they will be- 
 come dwarfed and conceited, and fall far short of the 
 liberality and public spirit by which we attach others 
 to our cause. Unselfish and noble acts are the most 
 radiant epochs in the history of souls, points from 
 which we date a larger growth of thought and feel- 
 ing. When wrought in earliest youth, they lie in the 
 memory of age, like the coral islands, green and 
 sunny, waving with the fruits of a southern clime 
 amidst the melancholy waste of water. 
 
 The vice of selfishness displays itself in many 
 ways. In an extreme form it is termed avarice, and 
 shows itself in an insatiable desire to gather wealth. 
 As heat changes the hitherto brittle metal into the 
 elastic, yielding, yet deadly Damascus blade, so, 
 when the demon of avarice finds lodgment in the 
 heart of man, it changes all his better nature. It 
 may find him delighting to do good and relieving the 
 wants of others ; it leaves him one w T hose whole 
 energy and power are turned to the advancement of 
 self alone. This is the grand center to which all his 
 efforts tend. There is no length to which an avari- 
 
314 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 cious man will not go in his mad career. In order 
 that wealth may be his he will run almost any risks, 
 stand any privation, and will sacrifice not only his 
 own comfort and happiness, but that also of his 
 friends and associates, or even of his own family 
 circle. His mind is never expanded beyond the cir- 
 cumference of the almighty dollar. He thinks not 
 of his immortal soul, his accountability to God, or of 
 his final destiny. Selfishness in its worst form has 
 complete possession of his heart. It is the ruling 
 principle of his life. One strange feature about this 
 form of selfishness is that it ultimately defeats its 
 own ends. Its possessor is an Ishmael in the com- 
 munity. He passes to the grave without tasting the 
 sweets of friendship or the comforts of life. Striving 
 for wealth in order that he may have wherewith to 
 procure happiness, he ends with the sacrifice of all 
 the means of enjoyment in order that he may aug- 
 ment his wealth more rapidly. 
 
 The closing hours of a life of selfishness must be 
 clouded with many painful thoughts. Chances for 
 doing good passed unimproved. In order that some 
 slight personal advantage might be gained kindly 
 feelings were suppressed. The heart, which was in- 
 tended to beat with compassion for others, has be- 
 come contracted to a narrow circle, and life, that 
 inestimable gift of Providence, instead of drawing to 
 its close a rounded and complete whole, has been 
 stinted and dwarfed, and passes on to the other 
 world but illy prepared for the great changes wrought 
 by the hand of death. 
 
OBSTINACY. 315 
 
 jBSTINACY and contention are common quali- 
 ties, most appearing in and best becoming a 
 ft mean and illiterate soul. They arise not so much 
 from a conscious defect of voluntary power, as 
 foolhardiness is not seldom the disguise of conscious 
 timidity. Obstinacy must not be confounded with 
 perseverance ; for obstinacy presumptuously declines 
 to listen to reason, but perseverance only continues its 
 exertion while satisfied that good judgment sustains 
 its course. There are few things more singular than 
 that obstinacy which, in matters of the highest im- 
 portance to ourselves, often prevents us from ac- 
 knowledging the truth that is perfectly plain to all. 
 There is something in obstinacy which differs from 
 every other passion. Whenever it fails it never re- 
 covers, but either breaks like iron or crumbles sulkily 
 away like a fractured arch. Most other passions have 
 their periods of fatigue and rest, their suffering and 
 their care ; but obstinacy has no resources, and the 
 first wound is mortal. Narrowness of mind is often 
 the cause of obstinacy ; we do not easily believe be- 
 yond what we see. Hence it is that the more ex- 
 tensive one's knowledge of mankind becomes, the 
 less inclined is he to the vice of obstinacy ; and an 
 obstinate disposition, instead of denoting a mind of 
 superior ability, always denotes a dwarfed, ignorant, 
 and selfish disposition. An obstinate, ungovernable 
 self-sufficiency plainly points out to us that state of 
 
316 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 imperfect maturity at which the graceful levity of 
 youth is lost and the solidity of experience not yet 
 acquired. 
 
 Obstinacy is not only a result of a narrow, illiberal 
 judgment, but it is a barrier to all improvements. It 
 casts the mind in a mold, and as utterly prevents it 
 from expanding as though it were a material sub- 
 stance encased in iron. A stubborn mind conduces 
 as little to wisdom, or even to knowledge, as a stub- 
 born temper to happiness. Whosoever perversely 
 resolves to adhere to plans or opinions, be they right 
 or be they wrong, because they have adopted them, 
 raises an impassable bar to information. The wiser 
 we are the more we are aware of the extent of our 
 ignorance. Those who have but just entered the 
 vestibule of the temple of knowledge invariably feel 
 themselves much wiser than those who meekly wor- 
 ship in the inner sanctuary. Positiveness is much 
 more apt to accompany the statement of the super- 
 ficial observer than him whose experience has been 
 vast and profound. Sir Isaac Newton, who might 
 have spoken with authority, felt as a child on the 
 shore of the great sea of human knowledge. Doubt- 
 less many of his followers feel as though far out on 
 the tossing waves ; for they act as if their opinion 
 could by no possibility be wrong. 
 
 Sometimes obstinacy is confounded with firmness, 
 and under this misnomer is practiced as a virtue. 
 But the line between obstinacy and firmness is strong 
 and decisive. Firmness of purpose is one of the 
 most necessary sinews of character, and one of the 
 
OBSTINACY. 317 
 
 best instruments of success. Without it, genius 
 wastes its efforts in a maze of inconsistencies. Firm- 
 ness, while not suffering itself to be easily driven 
 from its course, recognizes the fact that it is only 
 perfection that is immutable, but that for things im- 
 perfect change is the way to perfect them. It gets 
 the name of obstinacy when it will not admit of a 
 change for the better. Firmness without knowledge 
 can not be always good. In things ill it is not virtue, 
 but an absolute vice. It is a noble quality ; but un- 
 guided by knowledge or humility, it falls into obsti- 
 nacy, and so loses the traits whereby we before 
 admired it. 
 
 Society is often dragged down to low standards 
 by two or three who propose, in every case, to fight 
 every thing and every idea of which they are not the 
 instigators. There is nothing harder for a man with 
 a strong will than to make up his mind not always 
 to have his own way ; to submit, in many cases, 
 rather than to quarrel with his neighbors. One must 
 certainly make up his mind to lose much of happiness 
 who is not willing to give way at times to the wishes 
 of others. We must learn to turn sharp corners qui- 
 etly, or we shall be constantly hurting ourselves. 
 
 But we must not, in decrying obstinacy, overlook 
 the fact that, while it certainly is a great vice and 
 frequently the cause of great mischief, yet it has 
 closely allied with it the whole line of masculine vir- 
 tues, constancy, fidelity, and fortitude, and that in 
 their excess all the virtues, easily fall into it. Yet it is 
 ever easy to determine the line of demarkation where 
 
318 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 these virtues end and obstinacy begins. The small- 
 est share of common sense will suffice to detect it, 
 and there is little doubt that few people pass this 
 boundary without being conscious of the fault. The 
 business of constancy chiefly is bravely to stand by 
 and stoutly to suffer those inconveniences which are 
 not otherwise possible to be avoided. But constancy 
 does not adhere to an opinion merely for the sake 
 of having its own way, wherein it differs from 
 obstinacy. 
 
 There are situations in which the proper opinions 
 and modes of action are not evident. In such cases 
 we must maturely reflect ere we decide ; we must 
 seek for the opinions of those wiser and better ac- 
 quainted with the subject than ourselves ; we must 
 candidly hear all that can be said on both sides ; then, 
 and then only, can we in such cases hope to deter- 
 mine wisely. But the decision once so deliberately 
 adopted we must firmly sustain, and never yield but 
 to the most unbiased conviction of our former errors. 
 But when such conviction is secured, it is the part 
 of true manliness to acknowledge it, and of true 
 wisdom to make the required change. There is no 
 principle of constancy or of perseverance or of forti- 
 tude that requires us to continue in our former course 
 when convinced that it is wrong. 
 
SLANDER. 319 
 
 
 ImIHERE is nothing which wings its flight so swiftly 
 J^^% as calumny ; nothing which is uttered with more 
 ease ; nothing which is listened to with more 
 readiness, or dispersed more widely. Slander 
 soaks into the mind as water soaks into low and 
 marshy places, where it becomes stagnant and offen- 
 sive. Slander is like the Greek fire, which burned 
 unquenched beneath the water; or, like the weeds 
 which, when you have extirpated them in one place, 
 are sprouting vigorously in another ; or, it is like the 
 wheel which catches fire as it goes, and burns with 
 fiercer conflagration as its own speed increases. 
 
 The tongue of slander is never tired ; in one form 
 or another it manages to keep itself in constant em- 
 ployment. Sometimes it drips honey and sometimes 
 gall. It is bitter now, and then sweet. It insinuates 
 or assails directly, according to circumstances. It 
 will hide a curse under a smooth word and administer 
 poison in the phrases of love. Like death, it " loves 
 a shining mark," and is never so available and elo- 
 quent as when it can blight the hopes of the noble- 
 minded, soil the reputation of the pure, and break 
 down or destroy the character of the brave and 
 strong. 
 
 No soul of high estate can take delight in slan- 
 der. It indicates lapse, tendency toward chaos, utter 
 depravity. It proves that somewhere in the soul 
 there is a weakness — a waste, evil nature. Educa- 
 
320 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 tion and refinement are no proof against it. They 
 often serve only to polish the slanderous tongue, in- 
 crease its tact, and give it suppleness and strategy. 
 
 He that shoots at the stars may hurt himself, but 
 not endanger them. When any man speaks ill of 
 us we are to make use of it as a caution, without 
 troubling ourselves at the calumny. He is in a 
 wretched case that values himself upon the opinions 
 of others, and depends upon their judgment for the 
 peace of his life. The contempt of injurious words 
 stifles them, but resentment revives them. He that 
 values himself upon conscience, not opinion, never 
 heeds reproaches. When ill-spoken of take it thus : 
 If you have not deserved it you are none the worse ; 
 if you have, then mend. Flee home to your own 
 conscience, and examine your own heart. If you 
 are guilty it is a just correction ; if not guilty it is a 
 fair instruction ; make use of both ; so shall you dis- 
 till honey out of gall, and out of an open enemy 
 create a secret friend. 
 
 That man who attempts to bring down and de- 
 preciate those who are above him does not thereby 
 elevate himself. He rather sinks himself, while those 
 whom he traduces are benefited rather than injured 
 by the slander of one so base as he. He who in- 
 dulges in slander is like one who throws ashes to 
 the windward, which come back to the same place 
 and cover him all over. To be continually subject to 
 the breath of slander will tarnish the purest virtue as 
 a constant exposure to the atmosphere will obscure 
 the luster of the finest gold; but in either the real 
 
SLANDER. 321 
 
 value of both continues the same, although the cur- 
 rency may be somewhat impeded. Dirt on the char- 
 acter, if unjustly thrown, like dirt on the clothes, 
 should be let alone awhile until it dries, and then 
 it will rub off easily enough. Slander, like other 
 poisons, when administered in very heavy doses, is 
 often thrown off by the intended victim, and thus 
 relieves where it was meant to kill. Dirt sometimes 
 acts like fuller's earth — defiling for the moment, but 
 purifying in the end. 
 
 How small a matter will start a slanderous report ! 
 How frequently is the honesty and integrity of a man 
 disposed of by a smile or a shrug! How many good 
 and generous actions have been sunk in oblivion by 
 a distrustful look, or stamped with the imputation of 
 proceeding from bad motives by a mysterious and 
 seasonable whisper ! A mere hint, a significant look, 
 a mysterious countenance, directing attention to a 
 particular person, is often amply sufficient to start 
 the tongue of slander. 
 
 Never does a man portray his own character more 
 vividly than in his manner of portraying another's. 
 There is something unsound about the man whom 
 you have never heard say a good word about any 
 mortal, but who can say much of evil of nearly all 
 he is acquainted with. Never speak evil of another, 
 even with a cause. Remember we all have our 
 faults, and if we expect charity from the world we 
 must be charitable ourselves. Most persons have 
 visible faults, and most are sometimes inconsistent; 
 upon these faults and mistakes petty scandal delights 
 
 21 
 
322 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 to feast. And even where free from external blem- 
 ishes envy and jealousy can start the bloodhound of 
 suspicion — create a noise that will attract attention, 
 and many may be led to suppose there is game where 
 there is nothing but thin air. 
 
 A word once spoken can never be recalled ; there- 
 fore it is prudent to think twice before we speak, 
 especially when ill is the burden of our talk. Give 
 no heed to an infamous story handed you by a person 
 known to be an enemy to the one he is defaming; 
 neither condemn your neighbor unheard, for there are 
 always two sides' of a story. Hear no ill of a friend, 
 nor speak any of an enemy. Believe not all you 
 hear, nor report all you believe. Be cautious in be- 
 lieving ill of others, and more cautious in reporting it. 
 
 There is seldom any thing uttered in malice which 
 returns not to the heart of the speaker. Believe 
 nothing against another but on good authority, nor 
 report what may hurt another, unless it be a greater 
 hurt to others to conceal it. It is a sign of bad repu- 
 tation to take pleasure in hearing ill of our neighbors. 
 He who sells his neighbor's credit at a low rate makes 
 the market for another to buy his at the same rate. 
 He that indulges himself in calumniating or ridiculing 
 the absent plainly shows his company what they may 
 expect from him after he leaves them. ' 
 
 Deal tenderly with the absent. Say nothing to 
 inflict a wound on their reputation. They may be 
 wrong and wicked, yet your knowledge of it does not 
 oblige you to disclose their character, except to save 
 others from injury, Then do it in a way that 
 
SLANDER. 323 
 
 bespeaks a spirit of kindness for the absent offender. 
 Evil reports are often the results of misunderstand- 
 ing or of evil designs, or they proceed from an ex- 
 aggerated or partial disclosure of facts. Wait, learn 
 the whole story before you decide ; then believe what 
 the evidence compels you to, and no more. But 
 even then take heed not to indulge the least unkind- 
 ness, else you dissipate all the spirit of prayer for 
 them, and unnerve yourself for doing them good. 
 
 On many a mind and many a heart there are sad 
 inscriptions deeply engraved by the tongue of slan- 
 der, which no effort can erase. They are more dur- 
 able than the impression of the diamond on the 
 glass, for the inscription on the glass may be de- 
 stroyed by a blow, but the impression on the heart 
 will last forever. Let not the sting of calumny sink 
 too deeply in your soul. He who is never subject to 
 slander is generally of too little mental account to be 
 worthy of it. Remember that it is always the best 
 fruits that the birds pick at, that wasps light on the 
 finest flowers, and that slanderers are like flies, that 
 overlook all a man's good parts in order to light 
 upon his sores. Know that slander is not long-lived, 
 provided that your conduct does not justify them, 
 and that truth, the child of time, erelong will appear 
 to vindicate thee. 
 
324 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 
 SEW characteristics are more unfortunate in their 
 effects on the character of their possessor than 
 ]j irritability, few more repulsive and annoying to 
 those with whom circumstances bring him in 
 contact. Irritable people are always unjust, always 
 exacting, always dissatisfied. They claim every thing 
 of others, yet receive their best efforts with petulance 
 and disdain. This habit has an unfortunate tendency 
 of growth, until it renders a person wholly incapable 
 of conferring happiness upon others. As the morn- 
 ing fog renders the most familiar objects uncouth in 
 appearance, so it distorts the imagination and dis- 
 orders the mental faculties, so that truth can not 
 be distinguished from falsehood or friendship from 
 enmity. 
 
 It is one great spring-source of envy and discon- 
 tent, poisoning the fountain of life ; it is a moral 
 Upas-tree, scattering ruin and desolation on every 
 side. Its origin is not difficult to trace ; activity and 
 energy are its correctives. Those who habitually 
 occupy their minds about things serviceable to others 
 and to themselves are seldom peevish or irritable ; 
 but those whose powers are enervated by inertia, 
 whose mental pabulum is fiction generated in a dis- 
 ordered fancy, become misanthropic or grumblers, 
 and speedily give way to incessant fault-finding, as 
 annoying as it is unjust. Did irritable people know 
 or could they feel the effect of their conduct upon 
 
IRRITABILITY. 325 
 
 others, they would doubtless seek to refrain from the 
 habit ; but the possessor of such a turn of mind is as 
 selfish as he is unjust, and cares for no one but him- 
 self. For others he cares nothing. While he claims 
 the greatest deference for himself, he will not defer 
 to the wishes of others in the slightest degree. 
 
 The personal sin of fretting is almost as exten- 
 sive as any other evil, and if not universal, it is at 
 least very general. It is as vain and useless a habit 
 as any one can harbor. It is a direct violation of the 
 law of God, and its direful effects are fearful to con- 
 template. Nothing so warps a man's nature, sours 
 his disposition, and, sooner or later, breaks up the 
 friendly relationship of the domestic circle. It is sin- 
 ful in its beginning, sinful in its progress, and disas- 
 trous in its results. Such a spirit in the family, in 
 the school or Church is sure to become contagious, 
 and result in great injury. 
 
 A fretting, irritable disposition will not fail of 
 finding frequent opportunities for indulgence. It is 
 not particular as to time, place, or cause. Occasions 
 literally multiply as the habit increases in strength. 
 Nothing seems to go right with its possessor. In- 
 stead of conquering circumstances they control and 
 conquer him. Fretting weakens one's self-respect, 
 dissipates the regards of others, and breaks asunder 
 the bonds of affection. If a scolder should, through 
 deception and ignorance of his true character, be for 
 a time loved, still the canker is there, the mine is 
 sapped, and, sooner or later, the affections will be 
 sundered. Such a habit too frequently indulged in 
 
326 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 has drawn the best of husbands into dissipation, ren- 
 dered the most affectionate of wives miserable, and 
 estranged members of the same family circle. It 
 ruins all the relationships of life, it is a most perni- 
 cious disposition, a dreadful inheritance. 
 
 It is ever the disposition of human nature to pat- 
 tern more easily after the evils by which we are sur- 
 rounded than the good. There is also an unfortunate 
 disposition on our part to criticise the faults of those 
 around us which displease us. Did we always do 
 this in a spirit of true kindness it were well ; but a 
 confirmed grumbler is at heart so thoroughly selfish 
 that the spirit of charity is utterly foreign to his com- 
 plaints. Instead of earnest endeavor to discover and 
 pattern after the perfection of those by whom they 
 are surrounded, they seem bent only on learning the 
 faults of others, and to take positive pleasure in mak- 
 ing them public. Such a spirit only displays our own 
 weakness ; it shows to all keen observers that we 
 have not patience enough to bear with our neighbor's 
 weakness. It defeats its own ends, and instead of 
 exposing the faults of our neighbors, serves only to 
 call attention to our own irritable, peevish, unlovable 
 disposition. 
 
 It is an unfailing sign of moral weakness to be 
 constantly giving way to fitful outbreaks of ill- 
 temper. Fools, lunarians, the weak-minded, and the 
 ignorant are irascible, impatient, and possess an un- 
 governable disposition ; great hearts and wise are 
 calm, forgiving, and serene. To hear one perpetual 
 round of complaint and murmuring, to have every 
 
IRRITABILITY. 327 
 
 pleasant thought scared away by ,this evil spirit, is a 
 sore trial. It is, like the sting of a scorpion, a perpetual 
 nettle destroying your peace, rendering life a burden. 
 Its influence is deadly, and the purest and sweetest 
 atmosphere is contaminated into a deadly miasma 
 wherever this evil genius prevails. It has been truly 
 said that, while we ought not to let the bad temper 
 of others influence us, it would be as reasonable to 
 spread a blister upon the skin and not expect it to 
 draw, as to think a family not suffering because of 
 the bad temper of any of its inmates. One string 
 out of tune will destroy the music of an instrument 
 otherwise perfect, so if all the members of a family 
 do not cultivate a kind and affectionate disposition 
 there will be discord and every evil work. 
 
 To say the least, such a disposition is a most un- 
 fortunate one. It bespeaks littleness of soul and ig- 
 norance of mankind. It is far wiser to take the 
 more charitable view of our fellow-men. Life takes 
 its hue in a great degree from the color of our own 
 minds. If we are frank- and generous the world treats 
 us kindly. If, on the contrary, we are suspicious, men 
 learn to be cold and cautious toward us. Let a per- 
 son get the reputation of being touchy, and every 
 body is under more or less restraint in his or her 
 presence. The people who fire up easily miss a deal 
 of happiness. Their jaundiced tempers destroy their 
 own comfort as well as that of their friends. They 
 always have some fancied slight to brood over. The 
 sunny, serene moments of less selfish dispositions 
 never visit them. True wisdom inculcates the neces. 
 
328 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 sity of self-control in all instances. Much may be 
 affected by cultivation. We should learn to command 
 our feelings, and act prudently in all the ordinary 
 concerns of life. This will better prepare us to meet 
 sudden emergencies with calmness and fortitude. 
 
 *0W 
 
 SBNVY is the daughter of Pride, the author of 
 <&rr% murder and revenge, the beginner of secret 
 |j sedition, and the perpetual tormentor of virtue. 
 Envy is the slime of the soul, a venom, a 
 poison or quicksilver, which consumeth the flesh and 
 dryeth up the marrow of the bones. It is composed 
 of odious ingredients, in which are found meanness, 
 vice, and malice, in about equal proportions. It 
 wishes the force of goodness to be strained, and that 
 the measure of happiness be abated. It laments 
 over prosperity, pines at the -visit of success, is sick 
 at the sight of health. Like death, it loves a shining 
 mark ; like the worm, it never runs but to the fairest 
 fruits; like a cunning bloodhound, it singles out the 
 fattest deer in the flock. 
 
 Envy is no less foolish than it is detestable. It is 
 a vice which keeps no holiday, but is always in the 
 wheel and working out its own disquiet. It loves 
 darkness rather than light, because its deeds are evil. 
 Scorpions can be made to sting themselves to death 
 when confined within a circle of fire. Even such is 
 
ENVY. 329 
 
 envy ; for when surrounded on all sides by the 
 brightness of another's prosperity it speedily destroys 
 itself. He whose heart is imbued with the spirit of 
 envy loseth much of the pleasures of life. The en- 
 vious man is in pain upon all occasions which ought 
 to give him pleasure. 
 
 It were not possible for one to adopt a more sui- 
 cidal course as far as his own happiness is concerned. 
 The relish of his life is inverted, and the objects 
 which administer the highest satisfaction to those 
 who are exempt from this passion give the quickest 
 pangs to those subject to it. As when we look 
 through glasses colored all objects partake of the 
 glasses' color, so one moved and influenced by envy 
 sees not the perfection of his fellow-creatures, but 
 that they are to him odious. Youth, beauty, valor, 
 and wisdom are, to their perverted view, but objects 
 calculated to provoke their displeasure. What a 
 wretched and apostate state is this — to be offended 
 with excellence, and to hate a man because we ap- 
 prove him ! Were not its effects so disastrous to 
 personal character, the fit weapon wherewith to meet 
 it were the ridicule of all sensible people. But the 
 evil is too deeply seated to be spoken of lightly. As 
 its cause is situated deep in the character of the in- 
 dividual, so its effects are far-reaching in his life. 
 
 He that is under the dominion of envy can not 
 see perfections. He is so blinded that he is always 
 degrading or misrepresenting things which are ex- 
 cellent. This brings out strongly the difference be- 
 tween the envious man and him who is moved by the 
 
330 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 spirit of benevolence. The envious man is tormented, 
 not only by all the ills that befall himself, but by all 
 the good that happens to another ; whereas the be- 
 nevolent man is better prepared to bear his own 
 calamities unruffled, from the complacency and seren- 
 ity he has secured from contemplating the prosperity 
 of all around him. For the man of true benevo- 
 lence the sun of happiness must be totally eclipsed 
 before it can be darkness around him. But the envi- 
 ous man is made gloomy, not only by his own cloud 
 of sorrow, but by the sunshine around the heart of 
 another. 
 
 Other passions have objects to flatter them, and 
 seem to content and satisfy them for a while. There 
 is power in ambition, pleasure in luxury, and pelf in 
 covetousness ; but envy can give nothing but vexa- 
 tion. Envy is so base and detestable, so vile in its 
 origin, and so pernicious in its effects, that the pre- 
 dominance of almost any other quality is to be pre- 
 ferred. It is a passion so full of cowardice and 
 shame that nobody ever had the confidence to own 
 it. He that envieth maketh another man's virtue 
 his vice, and another man's happiness his torment ; 
 whereas he that- rejoice th at the prosperity of another 
 is partaker of the same. 
 
 Envy is a sentiment that desires to equal, or 
 excel, the efforts of its compeers, not so much by in- 
 creasing our own toil and ingenuity as by diminishing 
 the merits due to the efforts of others. It seeks to 
 elevate itself by the degradation of others ; it detests 
 the sound of another's praise, and deems no renown 
 
ENVY. 331 
 
 acceptable that must be shared. Hence, when dis- 
 appointments occur, they fall with unrelieved violence, 
 and the consciousness of discomfited rivalry gives 
 poignancy to the blow. Whoever feels pain in learn- 
 ing the good character of his neighbors will feel a 
 pleasure in the reverse ; and those who despair to 
 rise to distinction by their virtues are happy if others 
 can be depressed to a level with themselves. 
 
 Envy is so cruel in its pursuit that, when once 
 hounded on, it rests not till the grave closes over its 
 victim. There is a secure refuge against defamation, 
 and one redeeming trait of human nature is that there 
 every man's well-earned honors defend him against 
 calumny. Honors bestowed upon the illustrious dead 
 have in them no admixture of envy ; but these are 
 about the only kind of honors administered free from 
 envy. Though the fact is to be deeply lamented, it 
 is unfortunately true, that such is the perversion of 
 the human heart that ofttimes the only reward of 
 those whose merits have raised them above the com- 
 mon level is to acquire the hatred and aversion of 
 their compeers. He who would acquire lasting fame, 
 and would be remembered as one who did his duty 
 well, must resolve to submit to the shafts of envy 
 for the sake of noble objects. 
 
 Envy is a weed that grows in all soils and cli- 
 mates, and is no less luxuriant in the country than 
 in the court. It is not confined to any rank of men 
 or extent of fortune, but rages in the breast of those 
 of every degree. We are as apt to find it in the 
 humble walks of life as in the proud ; as much in the 
 
332 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 sordid, affected dress as in all the silks and embroid- 
 eries which the excess of age and folly of youth de- 
 light to be adorned with. Since, then, it keeps all 
 sorts of company, and infuses itself into the most 
 contrary natures and dispositions, and yet carries so 
 much poison and venom with it that it ruins any life 
 in which it finds lodgment — alienating the affections 
 from heaven, and raising rebellion against God him- 
 self — it is worth our utmost care to watch it in all 
 its disguises and approaches, that we may dis- 
 cover it at its first entrance, and dislodge it before 
 it procures a shelter to conceal itself, and work to 
 our confusion and shame. 
 
 "Thinkest thou the man whose mansions hold 
 The worldling's pomp and miser's gold 
 
 Obtains a richer prize 
 Than he who, in his cot at rest, 
 Finds heavenly peace a willing guest, 
 And bears the promise in his breast 
 Of treasures in the skies ?" 
 
 — Mrs. Sigourney. 
 
 f|||§HE lot of the discontented is, indeed, wretched; 
 1 and truly miserable are those who live but to 
 repine and lament, who have less resolution to 
 to resent than to complain, or else, mingling 
 resentment and complaint together, perceive no har- 
 mony and happiness around them. They discover 
 
DISCONTENT. 333 
 
 in the bounty and beauty of nature nothing to admire, 
 and in the virtues and capabilities of man nothing to 
 love and respect. A contented mind sees something 
 good in every thing, and in every wind sees a sign of 
 fair weather; but a discontented spirit distorts and 
 misconstrues all things, resolutely refusing to see 
 aught but ill in its surroundings. 
 
 The spirit of discontent is very unfortunate ; it is 
 even worse, for it is wicked as well as weak. The 
 very entertainment of the thought is enervating, par- 
 alyzing, destructive of all that is worthy of success, 
 in the present business of the entertainer. To ac- 
 complish any thing beyond what the common run of 
 business or professional men perform requires the 
 utmost concentration of the mind on the matter in 
 hand. There is no room in the thoughts for repining 
 over the misfortunes of one's self, or wishes for an 
 exchange of places with another. Indeed, it might 
 be truthfully predicated that the indulgers of such 
 wishes would fail utterly in the new sphere, could 
 they achieve their desires. 
 
 Nearly every one we meet wishes to be what he 
 is not, and every man thinks his neighbor's lot hap- 
 pier than his own. Through all the ramifications of 
 society all are complaining of their condition, find- 
 ing fault with their particular calling. "If I were 
 only this, or that, or the other, I should be content," 
 is the universal cry. Open the door to one discon- 
 tented wish and you know not how many will follow. 
 The boy apes the man; the man affects the ways 
 of boyhood. The sailor envies the landsman; the 
 
334 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 landsman goes to sea for pleasure. The business 
 man who has to travel about wishes for the day to 
 come when he can "settle down," whilst the seden- 
 tary man is always wanting a chance to flit about 
 and travel, which he thinks would be his greatest 
 pleasure. Town people think the country glorious ; 
 country people are always wishing that they might 
 live in town. 
 
 We are told that it is one property required of 
 those who seek the philosopher's stone that they 
 must not do it with any covetous desire to be rich, for 
 otherwise they shall never find it. But most true it 
 is, that whosoever would have this jewel of content- 
 ment (which turns all into gold ; yea, want into 
 wealth), must come with minds divested of all ambi- 
 tious and covetous thoughts, else they are never 
 likely to obtain it. The foundation of content must 
 spring up in a man's own mind, and he who has so 
 little knowledge of human nature as to seek happi- 
 ness by changing aught but his own disposition will 
 waste his life in fruitless efforts, and multiply the 
 griefs which he proposes to remove. 
 
 Contentment is felicity. Few are the real wants 
 of man. Like a majority of his troubles they are 
 more imaginary than real. If the world knew how 
 much felicity dwells in the cottage of the poor, but 
 contented, man — how sound he sleeps, how quiet his 
 rest, how composed his mind, how free from care, 
 and how joyful his heart — they would never more 
 admire the noises and diseases, the throngs of pas- 
 sions, and the violence of unnatural appetites that 
 
DISC OX TEXT, 3 00 
 
 fill the houses of the luxurious, and the hearts of 
 the ambitious. 
 
 Enjoy the blessings if God sends them, and the 
 evils of it bear patiently and sweetly, for this day is 
 ours. Always something of good can yet be found, 
 however apparently hopeless the situation. There is 
 scarcely any lot so low but there is something in it 
 to satisfy the man whom it has befallen, Providence 
 having so ordered things that in every man's cup. 
 how bitter soever, there are some cordial drops — 
 some £Ood circumstances — which, if wisely extracted, 
 are sufficient for the purpose he wants them — 
 that is, to make him contented and, if not happy, 
 resigned. 
 
 Contentment often abides with little, and rarely 
 dwells with abundance. ''Peace and few things are 
 preferable to great professions and great cares." 
 Such was the maxim of the Stoics. Xature teaches 
 us to live, but wisdom teaches us to live contented. 
 Contentment is the wealth of nature, for it gives 
 every thing we either want or need. A quiet and 
 contented mind is the supreme good ; it is the utmost 
 felicity a man is capable of in this world; and the 
 maintaining of such an uninterrupted tranquillity of 
 spirit is the very crown and glory of wisdom. The 
 point of aim for our vigilance to hold in view is to 
 dwell upon the brightest parts in every prospect, to 
 call off the thoughts when running upon disagreeable 
 objects, and strive to be pleased with the present 
 circumstances surrounding us. 
 
 Halt the discontent in the world arises from men 
 
336 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 regarding themselves as centers instead of the infin- 
 itesimal elements of circles. When you feel dis- 
 satisfied with your circumstances contemplate the 
 condition of those beneath you. One who wielded 
 as much influence as was possible in this republic of 
 ours says: " There are minds which can be pleased 
 by honors and preferments, but I can see nothing in 
 them save envy and enmity. It is only necessary to 
 possess them to know how little they contribute to 
 happiness. I had rather be in a cottage with my 
 books, my family, and a few old friends, dining upon 
 simple bacon and hominy, and letting the world roll 
 on as it likes, than to occupy the highest place which 
 human power can give." 
 
 Some make the sorry mistake of confounding 
 under the term contentment that fatal lack of energy 
 which repels all efforts for the improvement of one's 
 condition. Improvement can only be won by contin- 
 uous efforts for advancement, and a true contentment 
 is not to rest satisfied, to hope for nothing, to strive 
 for nothing, or to rest in inglorious ease, doing noth- 
 ing for your own or other's intellectual or moral 
 good. Such a state of feeling is only allowable 
 where nature has fixed an impassable and well-as- 
 certained barrier to all further progress, or where we 
 are troubled by ills past remedying. In such cases 
 it is the highest philosophy not to fret or grumble 
 when, by all our worrying, we can not help ourselves 
 a jot or tittle, but only aggravate an affliction that is 
 incurable. To soothe the mind to patience is, then, 
 the only resource left us, and thrice happy is he who 
 
DISCONTENT. 337 
 
 has thus schooled himself to meet all reverses and 
 disappointments. 
 
 When ills admit of a remedy it is the veriest 
 sarcasm upon contentment to bid you suffer them. 
 It is a mockery of content not to strive to improve 
 your condition as much as possible. True content- 
 ment bids you be content with what you have, not 
 with what you are ; not to be sighing and wishing 
 for things unattainable, but to cheerfully and con- 
 tentedly accept the facts of your position, and then, 
 if the way opens for improvement, to accept it at 
 once ; not to sit moping over your ill luck and many 
 misfortunes, but, having done the best you can, rest 
 content with the result ; not to be murmuring be- 
 cause your lines are not cast in as pleasant places 
 as your neighbor's, but strive to discover the pleas- 
 ures and happiness to be found in your present con- 
 dition, and with a manly and contented spirit dwell 
 therein until providence opens a more excellent way, 
 when it is your duty to embrace it. But do not 
 make the fatal mistake of hiding behind the word 
 contentment your lack of energy and pluck. 
 
 Contentment is the true gold which passes cur- 
 rent among the wise the world over, while supine 
 satisfaction is but the base counterfeit of the nobler 
 metal, and brings its possessor into scorn and con- 
 tempt. 
 
 22 
 
338 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 
 DECEIT and falsehood, whatever conveniences 
 they may for a time promise or produce, are 
 If in the sum of life obstacles to happiness. 
 Those who profit by the cheat distrust the de- 
 ceiver, and the act by which kindness was sought 
 puts an end to confidence. Nothing can compete 
 with human deceitfulness. Its origin is always to be 
 found in the motives of those who are actuated only 
 by a spirit of thorough selfishness. When men have 
 some personal end to accomplish, then is seen the 
 full flower of deceit. When they have some enemy, 
 opponent, or rival to punish, then deceit puts on its 
 most sturdy appearance. 
 
 That form of deceit which is cunningly laid and 
 unworthily carried on under the disguise of friend- 
 ship is, of all others, the most detestable. There 
 can be no greater treachery than first to raise a con- 
 fidence, and then deceive it. A man can not be 
 justified in deceiving, misleading, or overreaching 
 his neighbors. Still less, then, is he justified in in- 
 spiring confidence by smooth words and a gracious 
 manner, only that he may further his own selfish 
 end by breaking the trust placed in him. Nothing 
 can be more unjust than to play upon the belief of a 
 confiding person, to make him suffer for his good 
 opinion, and fare the worse for thinking you an 
 honest man. 
 
 A course of deception always defeats the true end 
 
DECEPTION. 339 
 
 of society. Society is a great compact designed to 
 promote the good of man, and to elevate him in dig- 
 nity, refinement, and intelligence. But too often it is 
 understood solely as a cunning contrivance to palm 
 off unreal virtues and to conceal real defects. Dig- 
 nity is too often only pretension, refinement an 
 artificial gloss, and intelligence only verbal display, 
 based upon knowledge barely sufficient to make a 
 show. All is vanity and disguises, empty mockeries 
 and hollow-hearted nullities. But the heart of man 
 is such a sorry mixture of good and bad that we are 
 only too willing to urge on the race, striving to see 
 who can be the most deceitful of all. Those whom 
 we live with are like actors on a stage ; they assume 
 whatever dress and appearance may suit their pres- 
 ent purpose, and they speak and act in keeping with 
 this character. 
 
 Man is as naturally set on ambition as the bee is 
 to gather honey. In the mad haste to stand well in 
 the eyes of the public and third parties, they are 
 prone to assume any disguise or counterfeit any vir- 
 tue by which they may accomplish their selfish ends. 
 They are afraid of slight outward acts which will in- 
 jure them in the eyes of others, but are utterly heed- 
 less of the tide of evil, of hatred, jealousy, and 
 revenge, which throb in their souls to their own 
 condemnation and shame. They are more troubled 
 by the outward and external effects of an evil course 
 of life than by the evil itself. It is the love of appro- 
 bation and not the conscience that enacts the part of 
 a moral sense in this case. 
 
340 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 Though a man may never give them outward ex- 
 pression, still, if he harbors in his breast all manner 
 of evil thoughts, they will be potent in shaping his 
 character. Though he may disguise them by artful 
 words and a gracious bearing, still they are there, 
 and their effect is as direful as though their expres- 
 sion was open and plain to all. Society at large may 
 be less injured by the latent existence of evil than by 
 its public expression ; but the man himself is as much 
 injured by the cherished thoughts of evil as by the 
 open commission of it, and sometimes even more. 
 For evil brought out ceases to disguise itself, and ap- 
 pears as hideous as it is in reality; but the evil that 
 lurks and glances through the soul avoids analysis 
 and evades detection. 
 
 Hypocrisy and deception are so near akin to each 
 other that you can not wound the one without touch- 
 ing the sensibilities of the other. A hypocrite lives 
 in society in the same apprehension as the thief who 
 lies concealed in the midst of the family he is to rob, 
 for he fancies himself perceived when he is least so ; 
 every motion alarms him ; he is suspicious that every 
 one who enters the room knows where he is hid and 
 is coming to seize him. Thus, as nothing hates so 
 valiantly as fear, many an innocent person who sus- 
 pects no evil intended him is detested by him who 
 intends it. 
 
 This multitudinous vice of deception takes on 
 many forms. Hypocrisy is but one, though it is per- 
 haps as much detested as any. But it is a lamentable 
 fact that scarcely any thing is really what it is repre- 
 
DECEPTION. 341 
 
 sented to be. As there are so many strange anoma- 
 lies in human nature, we are not surprised when we 
 discover the shallowness of so many apparently sin- 
 cere pretensions, the worthlessness of what appears 
 so fair. When it is all carefully summed up, it is 
 found always easier to be than merely appear to be. 
 He who pretends to great acquirements is worse put 
 to it to conceal his ignorance than would have sufficed 
 to have made him master of many sciences. 
 
 Those who strive by outward appearances to 
 carry an impression of wealth and station beyond 
 their real income are compelled, by their lavish ex- 
 penditures in aid of the deception, to a strict economy 
 in seclusion, whereas, were they content to exercise a 
 judicious economy at all times, they would soon be 
 placed in that position they so much long for. As for 
 the hypocrite, surely this is the most foolish deception 
 of all, since the hypocrite is at pains to put on the 
 appearance of virtue, he pretends to morality, to pure 
 friendship and esteem, and is more anxious that his 
 outward walk and conversation shall savor of these 
 virtues than if he were at heart possessed of them. 
 
 Since, then, a course of deception puts us to 
 more straits than ever the open course, is it not 
 true, then, in every-day life as well as individual 
 acts, "honesty is the best policy?" Why pur- 
 chase the base imitation of noble virtues, and de- 
 rive from them naught but ridicule and dislike, when 
 no greater outlay would procure for us the true 
 metals, which bring peace of mind and the honor 
 and esteem of all. 
 
342 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 ?E all of us scorn a busybody, and scarcely 
 have words of contempt strong enough to ex- 
 press our feelings towards one who is con- 
 stantly meddling in what in no way concerns 
 him. There are some persons so unfortunately dis- 
 posed that they can not rest easy until they have 
 investigated their neighbors' business in all of its 
 bearings, and even neglect their own to attend to his. 
 This trait of character is directly allied to envy 
 on the one hand and to slander on the other. Envy 
 incites in us a desire to possess the good fortune 
 that we discover falling to others. Meddling is sat- 
 isfied when it discovers all the minutiae of others' 
 affairs, and may be so utterly devoid of energy as to 
 care but little whether it can acquire the good or not. 
 Meddling is directly incited by egotism ; for that un- 
 fortunately leads not only to undue confidence in 
 one's own abilities, but, what is worse, to a feeling 
 that you are a little better able to attend to the affairs 
 of others than they themselves. 
 
 Slander, too, oft takes its rise in the curious 
 busyings of those who are interfering where there is 
 no call for their services. There is such a tendency 
 in human nature to flaunt abroad the faults of others, 
 that no sooner does one who systematically inter- 
 meddles, discover some failing — and he or she is sure 
 to do this, since it is human to err — than they 
 straightway hasten to lay before others the fruits 
 
INTERMEDDLING. 343 
 
 of their investigations. And thus is given to the 
 public the petty defects of some home life, which, 
 by constant repetition, soon assumes gigantic size, 
 as snow-balls rolled over and over by boys ; and so, 
 at length, the happiness of some home circle is de- 
 stroyed by the malicious and poison-giving officious- 
 ness of busybodies. 
 
 Neglecting our own affairs and meddling with 
 those of others is the source of many troubles. 
 Those who blow the coals of others' strife may 
 chance to have the sparks fly in their own face. We 
 think more of ourselves than of others, but some- 
 times more for others than ourselves. People are 
 often incited to meddling by the desire of having 
 "something to tell;" but, if you notice, they are but 
 narrow-minded and ignorant people, who talk about 
 persons and not things. Mere gossip is always a 
 personal confession either of malice or imbecility, and 
 the refined should not only shun it, but by the most 
 thorough culture relieve themselves of all temptation 
 to indulge in it. It is a low, frivolous, and too often 
 a dirty business. There are neighborhoods in which 
 it rages like a pest. Churches are split in pieces 
 by it ; neighbors are made enemies by it for life. In 
 many persons it degenerates into a chronic disease, 
 which is practically incurable. Be on your guard 
 against contracting so pernicious a habit. 
 
 A person who constantly meddles means to do 
 harm, and is not sorry to find he has succeeded. He 
 is a treacherous supplanter and underminer of the 
 peace of all families and societies. This being a 
 
344 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 maxim of unfailing truth, that nobody ever pries into 
 another man's concerns but with a design to do, or 
 to be able to do, him a mischief. His tongue, like 
 the tails of Samson's foxes, carries firebrands, and is 
 enough to set the whole field of the world in a flame. 
 To meddle with another's privileges and prerogatives 
 is vexatious ; to meddle with his interests is injurious ; 
 to meddle with his good name unites arid aggravates 
 both evils. 
 
 There is, perhaps, not a more odious character in 
 the world than a go-between, by which we mean the 
 creature who carries to the ear of one neighbor every 
 injurious observation that happens to drop from the 
 mouth of another. Such a person is the slanderer's 
 herald, and is altogether more odious than the slan- 
 derer himself. By this vile officiousness he makes 
 that poison effective which else would be inert ; for 
 three-fourths of the slanderers in the world would 
 never injure their object except by the malice of go- 
 betweens, who, under the mask of a double friend- 
 ship, act the part of a double traitor. The less 
 business a man has of his own, the more he attends 
 to the business of his neighbors. 
 
 Do not cultivate curiosity ; every man has in his 
 own life follies enough, in his own mind troubles 
 enough, in the performance of his own duties diffi- 
 culties enough, without being curious about the affairs 
 of others. Of all the faculties of the human mind, 
 curiosity is that which is most fruitful or the most 
 barren in effective results, according as it is well or 
 badly directed. The curiosity of an honorable man 
 
^ INTERMEDDLING. 345 
 
 willingly rests where the love of truth does not urge 
 it further onward, and the love of his neighbor bids 
 it stop. In other words, it willingly stops at the 
 point where the interests of truth do not beckon it 
 onward and charity cries halt. But the busybody in 
 others' affairs is not apt to hold his curiosity in such 
 reasonable limits. The slightest appearance of mys- 
 tery is sufficient to incite them to great exertions in 
 endeavor to gratify a curiosity as idle as it is useless, 
 and entirely out of his business. 
 
 A meddler in the affairs of others is seldom 
 moved by the spirit of charity. He is not curious to 
 discover where he can lend a hand of assistance. 
 If such were the case, it were a trait to be admired 
 rather than despised ; but, allied as it is to envy and 
 slander, to idle curiosity and inquisitiveness, it can 
 but be detested by all honest seekers for others' 
 good, and shunned by the truly enlightened and re- 
 fined. And if one would be honored and respected, 
 he will strive to be as free from the spirit of meddling 
 as possible. He will relegate that to the low and 
 frivolous, and respect himself too highly to be classed 
 among them. 
 
346 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 
 |||||NGER is the most impotent passion that ac- 
 jfe companies the mind of man. It affects nothing 
 it sets about, and hurts the man who is pos- 
 sessed by it more than the other against whom 
 it is directed. 
 
 The disadvantages arising from anger, which are its 
 unfailing concomicants under all circumstances, should 
 prove a panacea for the complaint. In moments of cool 
 reflection the man who indulges it views with a deep 
 disgust the desolation wrought by passion. Friend- 
 ship, domestic happiness, self-respect, the esteem of 
 others, are swept away as by a whirlwind, and one 
 brief fit of anger sometimes suffices to lay in wreck 
 the home happiness which years have been cementing 
 together. What crimes have not been committed in 
 the paroxysms of anger! Has not the friend mur- 
 dered his friend? the son massacred his parent? the 
 creature blasphemed his Creator. When, indeed, 
 the nature of this passion is considered what crimes 
 may it not commit? Is it not the storm of the 
 human mind which wrecks every better affection — 
 wrecks reason and conscience, and, as a ship driven 
 without helm or compass before the rushing gale, is 
 not the mind borne away without guide or govern- 
 ment by the tempest of unbounded rage? 
 
 To be angry about trifles is low and childish ; to 
 rage and be furious is brutish ; and to maintain per- 
 petual wrath is akin to the practice and temper of 
 
ANGER. 347 
 
 devils. The round of a passionate man's life is in 
 contracting future debts in his passionate moments 
 which he may have to pay in the future, and when it 
 is most inconvenient to make payment. He spends 
 his time in outrage and acknowledgment, in injury 
 and reparation; for anger begins in folly, but ends 
 in repentance. Anger may be looked for in the 
 character of weak-minded people, children not yet 
 learned to govern themselves, and those who, for 
 any reason, are not expected to have full command 
 over their faculties ; but no sensible man or woman 
 in the full possession of their powers will suffer the 
 degradation of allowing themselves to be overcome 
 by anger without afterwards experiencing the utmost 
 mortification. 
 
 A passionate temper renders a man unfit for ad- 
 vice, deprives him of his reason, robs him of all that 
 is really great or noble in his nature; it makes him 
 unfit for conversation, destroys friendship, changes 
 justice into cruelty, and turns all order into confu- 
 sion. Man was born to reason, to reflection, and to 
 do all things quietly and in order. Anger takes from 
 him this prerogative, transforms his manship into 
 childish petulance, his reasoning powers into brute 
 instinct. Consider, then, how much more you often 
 suffer from your anger than from those things for 
 which you are angry. Consider, further, whether 
 that for which you give way to angry outbreaks is 
 any fit compensation whatever for the degradation 
 and loss you suffer by giving way to passion. 
 
 No man is obliged to live so free from passion as 
 
348 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 not to show some sentiment ; on fit occasions it were 
 rather stoical stupidity than virtue to do otherwise. 
 There are times and occasions when the expression 
 of indignation is not only justifiable but necessary. 
 We are bound to be indignant at falsehood, selfish- 
 ness, and cruelty. A man of true feeling fires up 
 naturally at baseness or meanness of any sort, even 
 in cases where he may be under no obligation to 
 speak out. But then his anger is as reasonable in 
 its outward expression as in its origin. 
 
 We must, however, be careful how we indulge in 
 virtuous indignation. It is the handsome brother of 
 anger and hatred. Anger may glance into the breast 
 of a wise man, but rests only in the bosom of fools. 
 A wise man hath no more anger than is necessary to 
 show that he can apprehend the first wrong, nor any 
 more revenge than justly to prevent a second. 
 
 If anger proceeds from a great cause it turns to 
 fury ; if from a small cause it is peevishness ; and so 
 it is always either terrible or ridiculous. Sinful an- 
 ger, when it becomes strong, is called wrath; when 
 it makes outrage it is fury ; when it becomes fixed it 
 is termed hatred ; and when it intends to injure any 
 one it is called malice. All these wicked passions 
 spring from anger. The intoxication of anger, like 
 that of the grape, shows us to others, but conceals 
 us from ourselves, and we injure our own cause in 
 the eyes of the world when we too passionately and 
 eagerly defend it. 
 
 There is many a man whose tongue might govern 
 multitudes if he could only govern his tongue. He 
 
ANGER 349 
 
 is the man of power who controls the storms and 
 tempests of his mind. How sweet the serenity of 
 habitual self-control! How many stinging self-re- 
 proaches it spares us ! When does a man feel more 
 at ease with himself than when he has passed through 
 a sudden and strong provocation without speaking a 
 word, or in undisturbed good humor? When, on 
 the contrary, does he feel a deeper humiliation than 
 when he is conscious that anger has made him be- 
 tray himself? How many there are who check pas- 
 sion with passion, and are very angry in reproving 
 anger! Thus to lay one devil they raise another, 
 and leave more work to be done than they found 
 undone. Such a reproof of anger is a vice to be 
 reproved. Reproof either hardens or softens its ob- 
 ject. The sword of reproof should be drawn against 
 the offense and not against the offender. 
 
 It is not falling in the water, but remaining in it, 
 that drowns a man. So it is not the possession of 
 a strong and hasty temper, but the submission to it, 
 that produces the evils incident to anger. In no 
 other way does a man show genuine nobility more 
 than in resolutely holding his temper subject to rea- 
 son. In no other way can he so effectually attain 
 success, for a strong temper indicates a good amount 
 of energy; passion serves to dissipate this, so that 
 its good effects are not perceived; whereas, under 
 the guiding reins of self-control, this energy is gath- 
 ered into a "central glow," which renders success in 
 any predetermined line not only a possibility but a 
 very probable sequence. 
 
350 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 r>*' 
 
 &MMffitOK. 
 
 ^F^HERE is a large element of deception in all 
 ^f^? 5 ambitious schemes, for ofttimes, when at the 
 summit of ambition, one is at the depths of 
 despair, and the showy results of a successful 
 pursuit of ambition are sometimes but gilded misery, 
 the casing of despair. The history of ambition is 
 written in characters of blood. It may be designated 
 as one of the vices of small minds, illiberal and un- 
 acquainted with mankind. It is a solitary vice. The 
 road ambition travels is too narrow for friendship, too 
 crooked for love, too rugged for honesty, too dark 
 for science, and too hilly for happiness. 
 
 Those who pursue ambition as a means of happi- 
 ness awake to a far different reality. The wear and 
 tear of hearts is never recompensed. It steals away 
 the freshness of life ; it deadens its vivid and social 
 enjoyments ; it shuts our souls to our own youth, 
 and we are old ere we remember that we have made 
 a fever and a labor of our raciest years. The hap- 
 piness promised by ambition dissolves in sorrow just 
 as we are about to grasp it. It makes the same 
 mistake concerning power that avarice makes con- 
 cerning wealth. She begins by accumulating power 
 as a means of happiness, but she finishes by continu- 
 ing to accumulate it as an end. 
 
 A thoroughly ambitious man will never make a 
 true friend, for he who makes ambition his god 
 tramples upon every thing else. What cares he if 
 
AMBITION. 351 
 
 in his onward march he treads upon the hearts of 
 those who love him best. In his eyes your only 
 value lies in the use you may be to him. Personally 
 one is nothing to him. If you are not rich or famous 
 or powerful enough to advance his interests, after he 
 has got above you he cares no more for you. It is 
 the nature of ambition to make men liars and cheats, 
 to hide the truth in their breast, and show, like jug- 
 glers, another thing in their mouth ; to cut all friend- 
 ships and enmities to the measure of their interests, 
 and to make a good countenance without the help of 
 a good will. 
 
 If, as one says, "ambition is but a shadow's sha- 
 dow," it were well to remember that a shadow, wher- 
 ever it passes, leaves a track behind. It would 
 conduce to humility also to remember that of the 
 greatest personages in the world when once they 
 are dead there remains no monument of their 
 selfish ambition except the empty renown of their 
 boasted name. It is a very indiscreet and trouble- 
 some ambition which cares so much about fame, 
 about what the world will say of us, to be always 
 looking in the faces of others for approval, to be 
 always anxious about the effect of what we do or say, 
 to be always shouting to hear the echo of our own 
 voices. To be famous ? What does this profit a year 
 hence, when other names sound louder than yours? 
 
 The desire to be thought well of, to desire to be 
 great in goodness, is in itself a noble quality of 
 the mind, and is often termed ambition, though it 
 lacks the element of selfishness which renders ambi- 
 
352 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 tion so odious to all right-minded people. It seems 
 an abuse of language to confound such a trait of the 
 mind with ambition. It were better to call it aspira- 
 tion, which becomes ambition only when carried to 
 an extreme, or when the objects for the attainment 
 of which ambition incites us to put forth our utmost 
 exertions are unworthy the attention of sentient 
 moral beings, who live not only for time, but for 
 eternity. A worthy aspiration may be a great incen- 
 tive to advancement and civilization, a great teacher 
 to morality and wisdom ; but an unworthy ambition, 
 unworthy because of its ends or the zeal with which 
 they are pursued, is often the instrument of crime 
 and iniquity, the instigator of intemperance and 
 rashness. 
 
 Ambition is an excessive quality, and, as ; such, is 
 apt to lead us to the most extraordinary results. If 
 our ambition leads us to excel or seek to excel in 
 that which is good, the currents it may induce us to 
 support will be none but legitimate ones. But if it 
 is stimulated by pride, envy, avariciousness, or vanity, 
 we will confine our support principally to the counter 
 currents of life, and thus leave behind us misery and 
 destruction. An ambitio7t to appear to be thought 
 great in noble qualities may lead us to appear good ; 
 but where we only act from ambition, and not from 
 aspiration, we are subject to fall at any moment, 
 since it were vain to expect selfishness to long con- 
 tinue in any right action. 
 
 If it is our ambition to gain distinction, we will 
 rob the weak and flatter the strong, and become the 
 
AMBITION. 353 
 
 fawning slave of those who are able to foist us above 
 our betters, and deck us with the titles and honors of 
 the great without any regard to our own merit or 
 respectability. But if we are ambitious to do good, 
 without any regard for the fame we may win or the 
 praise we may command, our course will be honorable 
 and just, our acts and deeds most worthy and good. 
 When we have done with the world the prints of our 
 worthy ambition will still remain as a legacy to those 
 who come after us to enjoy and reap the benefits, for 
 which they will revere our memory, and retain our 
 names in the lists of those whose labors have aided 
 in enriching the world and exalting the general in- 
 terests of mankind. 
 
 To be ambitious of true honor, of the true glory 
 and perfection of our nature is the very principle and 
 incentive of virtue; but to be ambitious of titles, of 
 place, of ceremonial respects and civil pageantry is as 
 vain and little as the things are which we court. 
 Much of the advancement of the world can be traced 
 to the efforts of those who were moved by ambition to 
 become famous. Like lire, ambition is an excellent 
 servant, but a poor master. As long as it is held 
 subservient to integrity and honor, and made to con- 
 form to the requirements of justice, there is but little 
 danger of a man's having too much of it. But, be- 
 ware ! it is such an insatiate passion that you must 
 be continually on your guard lest it speedily become 
 the ruling principle of your being. 
 
 23 
 
354 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 ^f£|*MONG the qualities of mind and heart which 
 ^fsp conduce to worldly success, there is no one the 
 fjr importance of which is more real, yet which is 
 more generally underrated at this day by the 
 young, than courtesy — that feeling of kindness, of 
 love for our fellows, which expresses itself in pleas- 
 ing manners. Owing to that spirit of self-reliance 
 and self-assertion, they are too apt to despise those 
 nameless and exquisite tendernesses of thought and 
 manner that mark the true gentleman. Yet history 
 is crowded with examples showing that, as in litera- 
 ture it is the delicate, indefinable charm of style, not 
 the thought, that makes a work immortal, so it is the 
 bearing of a man towards his fellows that ofttimes, 
 more than any other circumstance, promotes or ob- 
 structs his advancement in life. 
 
 Manner has a great deal to do with the estima- 
 tion in which men are held by the world ; and it has 
 often more influence in the government of others than 
 qualities of much greater depth and substance. We 
 may complain that our fellow-men are more for form 
 than substance, for the superficial rather than the 
 solid contents of a man, but the fact remains, and it 
 is a clew to many of the seeming anomalies and 
 freaks of fortune which surprise us in the matter of 
 worldly prosperity. The success or failure of one's 
 plans have often turned upon the address and manner 
 of the man. Though there are a few people who can 
 
POLITENESS. 355 
 
 look beyond the rough husk or shell of a fellow-being 
 to the finer qualities hidden within, yet the vast ma- 
 jority, not so keen-visaged nor tolerant, judge a per- 
 son by his outward bearings and conduct. 
 
 Grace, agreeable manners, and fascinating powers 
 are one thing, while politeness is another. The two 
 points are often mistaken in the occasional meeting, 
 but the true gentleman always rises to the surface at 
 last. Nothing will develop a spirit of true politeness 
 except a mind imbued with goodness, justness, and 
 generosity. Manners are different in every country ; 
 but true politeness is every-where the same. Man- 
 ners which take up so much of our attention are only 
 artificial helps which ignorance assumes in order to 
 imitate politeness, which is the result of much good 
 sense, some good-nature, and a little self-denial for 
 the sake of others, but with no design of obtaining 
 the same indulgence from them. A person possessed 
 of those qualities, though he had never seen a court, 
 is truly agreeable ; and if without them would con- 
 tinue a clown, though he had been all his life a gen- 
 tleman usher. 
 
 He is truly well-bred who knows when to value 
 and when to despise those national peculiarities which 
 are regarded by some with so much observance. A 
 traveler of taste at once perceives that the wise are 
 polite all the world over, but that fools are polite 
 only at home. Since circumstances always alter 
 cases, the polite man must know when to violate the 
 conventional forms which common practice has estab- 
 lished, and when to respect them. To be a slave to 
 
356 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 any set code of actions is as bad as to despise them. 
 Perceptiveness, adaptation, penetration, and a happy 
 faculty of suiting manners to circumstances, is one 
 of the principles upon which one must work ; for the 
 etiquette of the drawing-room differs from that of the 
 office or railroad-car, and what may be downright 
 rudeness in one case may be gentility in the other. 
 
 Benevolence and charity, with a true spirit of 
 meekness, must be one of the ruling motives of the 
 understanding ; for without this no man can be po- 
 lite. Politeness must know no classification ; the rich 
 and the poor must alike share its justice and hu- 
 manity. Exclusive spirits, that shun those whose 
 level in life is not on the same extravagant platform 
 as themselves, can not aspire to the high honor of 
 wearing the name of gentleman. The truly polite 
 man acts from the highest and noblest ideas of what 
 is right. 
 
 True politeness ever hath regard for the comfort 
 and happiness of others. " It is," says Witherspoon, 
 real kindness kindly expressed." Viewed in this 
 light, how devoid of the virtue are some who pride 
 themselves on a strict observance of all its rules ! 
 Many a man who now stands ranked as a gentleman, 
 because his smile is ready and his bow exquisite, is, 
 in reality, unworthy of such an honor, since he cares 
 more for the least incident pertaining to his own com- 
 fort than he does for the greatest occasion of discom- 
 fort to others. 
 
 The true gentleman is recognized by his regard 
 for the rights and feelings of others, even in matters 
 
 
POLITENESS. 357 
 
 the most trivial. He respects the individuality of 
 others, just as he wishes others to respect his own. 
 In society he is quiet, easy, unobtrusive, putting on 
 no airs nor hinting by word or manner that he deems 
 himself better, wiser, or richer than any one about 
 him. He is never " stuck up," nor looks down upon 
 others because they have not titles, honors, or social 
 position equal to his own. He never boasts of his 
 achievements or angles for compliments by affecting 
 to underrate what he has done. He prefers to act 
 rather than to talk, to be rather than to seem, and, 
 above all things, is distinguished by his deep insight 
 and sympathy, his quick perception of and attention 
 to those little and apparently insignificant things that 
 may cause pleasure or pain to others. In giving his 
 opinions he does not dogmatize ; he listens patiently 
 and respectfully to other men, and, if compelled to 
 dissent from their opinions, acknowledges his fallibil- 
 ity, and asserts his own views in such a manner as 
 to command the respect of all who hear him. Frank- 
 ness and cordiality mark all his intercourse with his 
 fellows, and, however high his station, the humblest 
 man feels instantly at ease in his presence. 
 
 The truest politeness comes of sincerity. It must 
 be the outcome of the heart or it will make no last- 
 ing impression, for no amount of polish will dispense 
 with truthfulness. The natural character must be 
 allowed to appear freed of its angularities and asper- 
 ities. To acquire that ease and grace of manners 
 which distinguishes and is possessed by every well- 
 bred person one must think of others rather than of 
 
358 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 one's self, and study to please them even at one's 
 own inconvenience. "Do unto others as you would 
 that others should do unto you" — the golden rule of 
 life — is also the law of politeness, and such politeness 
 implies self-sacrifice, many struggles and conflicts. 
 It is an art and tact rather than an instinct and 
 inspiration. 
 
 Daily experience show r s that civility is not only 
 one of the essentials of success, but it is almost a 
 fortune in itself, and that he who has this quality in 
 perfection, though a blockhead, is almost sure to 
 rise where, without it, men of high ability fail. 
 "Give a boy address and accomplishment," says 
 Emerson, "and you give him the mastery of palaces 
 and fortunes. Wherever he goes he has not the 
 trouble of earning or owning them ; they solicit him 
 to enter and possess." Genuine politeness is almost 
 as necessary to enjoyable success as integrity or in- 
 dustry. 
 
 We despise servility, but true and uniform polite- 
 ness is the glory of any young man. It should be a 
 politeness full of frankness and good nature, unobtru- 
 sive, constant, and uniform in its exhibition to every 
 class of men. He who is overwhelmingly polite to a 
 celebrity or a nabob and rude to a laborer because he 
 is a laborer deserves to be despised. That style of 
 manners which combines self-respect with respect for 
 the rights and feelings of others, especially if it be 
 warmed up by the fires of a genial heart, is a thing 
 to be coveted and cultivated, and it is a thing that 
 pays alike in cash and comfort. 
 
POLITENESS i ' I 
 
 What a man says or does is often an uncertain 
 
 test oi what he is. It is the way in which he says 
 or does it that furnishes the best index of his char- 
 acter. It is by the incidental expression given to his 
 thoughts and feelings by his looks, tones, and ges- 
 tures, rather than by his deeds and words, that we 
 prefer to judge him. One may do certain deeds from 
 design, or repeat certain professions by rote ; honeyed 
 words mar mask feelings of hate, and kindly acts 
 may be formed expressly to veil sinister ends, but 
 the "manner oi the ma:;"* is not so easily controlled. 
 
 The mode in which a kindness is done often af- 
 fects us more than the deed itself. The act may 
 have been prompted by one of many questionable 
 motives, as vanity, pride, or interests; but the warmth 
 or coldness oi address is less likely to deceive. A 
 favor may be conferred so crudoqnodv as to prevent 
 any feeling oi obligation, or it may be refused so 
 courteously as to awaken more kindly feelings than 
 if it had been ungraciously granted. 
 
 Good manners are well-nigh an essential part of 
 life education, and their importance can not be too 
 largely magnified when we consider that they are 
 the outward expressions of an inward virtue. Sc ; 
 courtesies should emanate from the heart, for re- 
 member always that the worth of manner consists in 
 being the sincere expression oi feelings. Like the 
 dial oi a watch they should indicate that the works 
 within are good and true. True civility needs no 
 false lights to show its points. It is the embodiment 
 of truth, the mere opening out of the inner self. 
 
360 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 The arts and artifices of a polished exterior are well 
 enough, but if they are any thing more or less than 
 a fair exponent of inward rectitude their hollowness 
 can not long escape detection. 
 
 The cultivation of manner, though in excess it is 
 foppish and foolish, is highly necessary in a person 
 who has occasion to negotiate with others in matters 
 of business. Affability and good-breeding may even 
 be regarded as essential to the success of a man in 
 any eminent station and enlarged sphere of life, for 
 the want of it has not unfrequently been found, in a 
 great measure, to neutralize the results of much in- 
 dustry, integrity, and honesty of character. There 
 are, no doubt, a few strong, tolerant minds which 
 can bear with defects and angularities of manner, 
 and look only to the more genuine qualities ; but the 
 world at large is not so forbearant, and can not help 
 forming its judgments and likings mainly according 
 to outward conduct. 
 
 It has been well remarked that whoever imagines 
 legitimate manners can be taken up and laid aside, 
 put on and off, for the moment, has missed their 
 deepest law. A noble and attractive every-day bear- 
 ing comes of goodness, of sincerity, of refinement, 
 and these are bred in years, not moments. It is the 
 fruit of years of earnest, kindly endeavors to please. 
 It is the last touch, the crowning perfection of a 
 noble character; it has been truly described as the 
 gold on the spire, the sunlight on the corn-field, and 
 results only from the truest balance and harmony 
 of soul. 
 
•#&%• 
 
 SOCIABILITY. 361 
 
 ?06I^IMM& 
 
 SOCIETY has been apply compared to a heap of 
 ^p embers, which, when separated, soon languish, 
 
 # darken, and expire, but, if placed together, glow 
 with a ruddy and intense heat, a just emblem of 
 the strength, happiness, and security derived from 
 society. The savage who never knew the blessings 
 of combination, and he who quits society from apathy 
 or misanthropic spleen, are like the separate embers, 
 dark, dead, useless; they neither give nor receive 
 heat, neither love nor are beloved. 
 
 From social intercourse are derived some of the 
 highest ' enjoyments of life. Where there is a free 
 interchange of opinion, the mind acquires new ideas, 
 and, by a frequent exercise of its powers, the under- 
 standing gains fresh vigor. The true sphere of hu- 
 man virtue is found in society. This is the school of 
 human faith and trials. In social, active life difficul- 
 ties will perpetually be met with. Restraints of many 
 kinds will be necessary, and studying to behave right 
 in respect to these is a discipline of the human heart 
 useful to others and improving to itself. It is 
 good to meet in friendly intercourse and pour out 
 that social cheer which so vivifies the weary and de- 
 sponding heart. It elevates the feelings, and makes 
 us all the better for the world. 
 
 Society is the balm of life. Should any one be 
 entirely excluded from all human intercourse he would 
 be wretched. Men were formed for society. It is 
 
362 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 one important end for which they were made rational 
 creatures. No man was made solely for himself, and 
 no man is capable of living in the world totally inde- 
 pendent of others. The wants and weaknesses of 
 mankind render society necessary for their conven- 
 ience, safety, and support. God has formed men 
 with different powers and faculties, and placed them 
 under different circumstances, that they might be 
 able to promote each others' good. Some are wiser, 
 richer, and stronger than others that they may direct 
 the conduct, supply the wants, and bear the burdens 
 of others. Some are formed for one and some are 
 formed for another employment, and all are qualified 
 for some useful business, conducive to the general 
 good of society. The whole frame and texture of 
 mankind make it appear that they were designed to 
 live in society. The longer men live in society the 
 more terrible is the thought of being excluded from it. 
 
 Society is the only field where the sexes meet on 
 the terms of equality, the arena where character is 
 formed and studied, the cradle and the realm of pub- 
 lic opinion, the crucible of ideas, the world's uni- 
 versity, at once a school and a theater, the spur and 
 the crown of ambition, the tribunal which unmasks 
 pretensions and stamps real merit, the power that 
 gives government leave to be, and outruns the Church 
 in fixing the moral sense of the people. 
 
 Many young men fail for years to get hold of the 
 idea that they are subject to social duties. They 
 act as though the social machinery of the world were 
 self-operating. They see around them social organi- 
 
SOCIABILITY. 363 
 
 zations in active existence. The parish, the Church, 
 and other bodies that embrace in some form of so- 
 ciety all men, are successfully operated, and yet they 
 take no part nor lot in the matter. They do not think 
 it necessary for them to devote either time or money 
 to society. Sometimes they are apt to get into a 
 morbid state of mind, which disinclines them to social 
 intercourse. They become so devoted to business 
 that all social intercourse is irksome. They go out to 
 tea as if they were going to jail, and drag themselves 
 to a party as to an execution. This disposition is 
 thoroughly selfish, and is to be overcome by going 
 where you are invited, always and at any sacrifice of 
 mere feeling. Do not shrink from contact with any 
 thing except bad morals. Men who affect your un- 
 healthy mind with antipathy will prove themselves 
 very frequently on mature acquaintance your best 
 friends and wisest counselors. 
 
 It is to be noticed with what apparent ease some 
 men enter society, and how others remain away 
 always. Such are apt to think that society has not 
 discharged its duties as to them. But all social du- 
 ties are reciprocal. Society is far more apt to pay 
 its dues to the individual than the individual to so- 
 ciety. Have you, who complain of the cold selfish- 
 ness of society, done any thing to give you a claim 
 to social recognition ? What kind of coin do you 
 propose to pay in the discharge of the obligations 
 which come upon you with social recognition? In 
 other words, as a return for what you wish society to 
 do, what will you do for society ? Will you be a 
 
364 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 member of society by right or by courtesy ? If you 
 have so mean a spirit as to be content to be a bene- 
 ficiary of society, to receive favors and confer none, 
 you have no business in the social circle to which 
 you aspire. 
 
 The spirit of life is society ; that of society is free- 
 dom ; that of freedom the discreet and modest use 
 of it. A man may contemplate virtue in solitude and 
 retirement ; but the practical part consists in its par- 
 ticipation and the society it hath with others ; for 
 whatever is good is better for being communicated. 
 As too long a retirement weakens the mind, so too 
 much company dissipates it. Too much society is 
 nearly as bad as none. A man secluded from com- 
 pany can have none but the devil and himself to 
 tempt him ; but he that converses much in the world 
 has almost as many snares as he has companions. 
 The great object of society is refreshment of spirit. 
 This is not to be obtained by luxury or by the can- 
 kerous habit of speaking against others, but by a 
 bright and easy interchange of ideas on subjects 
 which, even in their brightest and most playful as- 
 pects, are worthy to engage the thoughts of men. 
 
 There is an essential vulgarity in one phase of 
 social life, — that which considers the welfare of the 
 guest's stomach to be the essential part of the host's 
 duty, and the great question of the guests to relate 
 to the decorating of their own backs. Such views 
 elevate nobody ; they refine nobody ; they inspire and 
 instruct nobody ; they satisfy nobody. This view 
 loses sight of the great end and aim of society, which 
 
SOCIABILITY- 365 
 
 is to refine and elevate mankind, not to feed them 
 upon dainties, or to enable them to show off good 
 clothes. Dean Swift had a better relish for good 
 society than for choice viands. When invited to the 
 houses of great men he sometimes insisted upon 
 knowing what persons he was likely to meet. " I 
 do n't want your bill of fare, but your bill of 
 company." 
 
 It is this losing sight of the true end of society 
 which causes it to present so many strange anoma- 
 lies. Yet with all its defects it is well-nigh indis- 
 pensable to one who would wield power and influence 
 in the world's arena. There is no way to act out 
 the promptings of your better nature, and to move 
 men in the right direction, so potential as that 
 offered to the social man. You can not move men 
 until you show yourself one among them. You can 
 not know their wants and needs until you have min- 
 gled with them. By refusing to cast your lot with 
 others socially, you are as powerless to do good as 
 the mountain peak is to raise tropical flowers. 
 
 It is the manner of some to forego meeting oth- 
 ers socially. There will certainly come a time when 
 they will regret it ; for the human heart is like a 
 millstone in a mill : When you put wheat under it, 
 it turns and bruises the wheat into flour. If you put 
 no wheat in it, it still grinds on ; but then it grinds 
 away itself. In society the sorrows and griefs of 
 others are the object from which we extract the flour 
 of charity and loving kindness ; but to the hermit 
 from society his own griefs and sorrows have the 
 
366 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 effect to render him cold and selfish. Man in so- 
 ciety is like a flower -bud on its native stalk. It 
 is there alone his faculties, expanded in full bloom, 
 shine out ; there only reach their proper use. "It is 
 not safe for man to be alone." In the midst of the 
 loudest vauntings of philosophy, nature will have her 
 yearning for society and friendship. A good heart 
 wants something to be kind to ; and the best part 
 of our nature suffers most when deprived of con- 
 genial society. 
 
 It becomes all men to seek the general good of 
 society in return for the benefits they receive from 
 it. Though the general good of society sometimes 
 requires the individual members to give up private 
 good for that of the public, yet it is always to be 
 supposed that individuals receive more advantage 
 than disadvantage from society, on the whole. In- 
 deed, there is scarcely any comparison in this case. 
 The public blessings are always immensely great and 
 numerous. They are more in number than can be 
 reckoned up, and greater in worth than can be easily 
 described. 
 
 The most independent individuals in society owe 
 their principal independence to society, and the most 
 retired and inactive persons feel the happy influence 
 of society, though they may seem to be detached 
 from it. No man can reflect upon that constant 
 stream of good which is perpetually flowing down to 
 him from well-regulated society, without feeling his 
 obligation to maintain and support it. Should this 
 stream of happiness cease to flow, the most careless 
 
DIGNITY. 367 
 
 and indifferent would feel their loss, and feel a sense 
 of their duty to uphold the good of society. Let the 
 head of society cease to direct and the hands to ex- 
 ecute, and the other members of the public body 
 would soon find themselves in a forlorn and wretched 
 state. 
 
 " The dignity of man into your hands is given, 
 Oh keep it well, with you it sinks or lifts itself to heaven." 
 
 — Schiller. 
 
 f|k\IGNITY denotes that propriety of mien and 
 carriage which is appropriate to the different 
 walks and ranks of life. In regard to our in- 
 tercourse with men we should often reflect, not 
 only whether our conduct is proper and correct, but 
 whether it is urbane and dignified. Dignity of car- 
 riage is nearly always associated with high endow- 
 ments ; the reverse is, at any rate, true, that high 
 endowments are associated with dignity. "A trifling 
 air and manner bespeaks a thoughtless and silly 
 mind," saith a Chinese proverb, "but a grave and 
 majestic outside is, as it were, the palace of the 
 
 50111." 
 
 True dignity is never gained by place, and never 
 lost when honors are withdrawn. There may be 
 dignity in a hovel as well as in a court ; in one 
 who depends on the sweat of his brow as well as 
 
368 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 one who is placed, by reason of his wealth, in a 
 position of independence. In all ranks and classes 
 it is equally acceptable and worthy of esteem. True 
 dignity is without arms. It does not deal in vain 
 and ostentatious parade. In proportion as we gratify 
 our own self-esteem by a love of display we commonly 
 forfeit to the same degree the respect of those whose 
 good opinion is worth possessing. A dignified man- 
 ner is not necessarily an imposing manner; for true 
 dignity is but the outward expression of inherent 
 worth of character, but an imposing manner is gen- 
 erally ostentatious in degree, and as such may be 
 taken as an evidence of imposition. That dignity 
 which seeks to make an ostentatious display is often 
 only a veil between us and the real truth of things. 
 It is only the false mask of appearance put on to 
 conceal inherent defects. 
 
 The ennobling quality of all politeness is dignity. 
 Have you not noticed that there are some persons 
 who possess an inexpressible charm of manner — a 
 something which attracts our love instantaneously, 
 when they have neither wealth, position, nor talents ? 
 You will find that a dignity of manner characterizes 
 their actions, and that a spirit of dignity hovers 
 around them. On the other hand, have you not 
 seen persons of wealth who were surrounded by 
 luxury and all the comforts of affluence, yet, in lack- 
 ing a spirit of dignity, lacked the essential to render 
 their lives influential for good? Where there is an 
 inherent want of dignity in the character, how many 
 distinguished and even noble acquisitions are required 
 
DIGNITY. 369 
 
 to supply its place! But when a natural dignity of 
 character exists, what a prepossession does it enlist 
 in its favor, and with how few substantial and real 
 excellencies are we able to pass creditably through 
 the world! 
 
 There are three kinds of dignity which either 
 adorn or deface human character. There is the dig- 
 nity of etiquette and good manners, which is often 
 of an artificial kind, and is a creature of rules and 
 ceremonies, and not of the heart. The second is the 
 dignity of pride and arrogance. This is a presump- 
 tuous dignity arising from self-conceit and egotism. 
 It is thoroughly selfish in its nature. It is more a 
 spirit of haughtiness and cold reserve than of true 
 dignity. Then there is the dignity of compassion 
 and kindness. This is that true dignity which enno- 
 bles life. It arises, not from selfishness, but from 
 kindness of heart, and from a sense of the impor- 
 tance of life. 
 
 Some men find it almost impossible to discover 
 the line which separates dignity from conceit. Dig- 
 nity is a splendid personal quality if it be of the 
 right sort. To possess it is to be above meanness, 
 above cringing, above any thing that is low and un- 
 seemly. It holds up its head, even among poverty 
 and outward shabbiness, and looks the world bravely 
 in the face. It is innate manliness that outward 
 garb can not change. But conceit is a very different 
 quality, and its possessor is very far from being 
 dignified, though he doubtlessly considers himself 
 
 to be so. He looks upon himself as the grand 
 
 24 
 
370 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 center of his social system, and upon all others as 
 satellites, whose particular business is to revolve 
 around him. The assumption may not take shape 
 in words, but it comes out in his manner all the 
 same. Let him undertake to be amiable, and there 
 is a sort of royal condescension ; he takes the atti- 
 tude of stooping rather than that of one reaching 
 out friendly hands to his equals. All this would be 
 offensive and somewhat exasperating were it not 
 ridiculous. But we laugh in charitable good nature, 
 and pity his absurdities. There is little use in try- 
 ing to point them out to him. He is so hoodwinked 
 by his overshadowing self-esteem that he can not 
 see. True dignity does not consist in haughty self- 
 assurance. In resolving to be dignified let us see to 
 it that we strive for the true kind. 
 
 In counseling dignity we advise no spirit of cold 
 hauteur and pride, but we do counsel such outward 
 walk and conversations as shall become one whp has 
 a just appreciation of life and its possibilities. One 
 who is always given to light and flippant remarks, 
 and always assuming a free and easy style in his 
 demeanor, can not carry such an impression of power 
 as one who bears about him the impression of a man 
 among men by his dignified and decorous bearing. 
 True dignity exists independent of — 
 
 "Studied gestures or well-practiced smiles." 
 
 Its seat should be in the mind, and then it will 
 not be found wanting in the manner. It is often 
 strikingly and eloquently displayed in the bearings 
 
AFFABILITY. 371 
 
 of those utterly unacquainted with the strict rules 
 of etiquette. If one has a modest consciousness of 
 his own worth, and a sincere desire to be of worth 
 to others, he must necessarily display true dignity in 
 his manner and bearing towards others. 
 
 sfe 
 
 ajS^mm$ 
 
 
 |||pFFABILITY is a real ornament, the most beau- 
 g^Bfe tiful dress that man or woman can wear, and 
 h worth far more as a means of winning favor 
 than the finest clothes and jewels ever were. 
 The exercise of affability creates an instantaneous 
 impression in your behalf, while the opposite quality 
 excites as quick a prejudice against you. So true is 
 this that were we asked to name any one quality 
 which, aside from mere mental powers, contributed 
 largely to success, we would mention affability. 
 
 Apart from its worth as an agreeable trait of 
 character, affability is a valuable commodity. Every 
 one who has business to transact should add this to 
 his stock in trade. It costs nothing, while it vastly 
 facilitates trade and profit. There are business men 
 and women who make fortunes simply by their affable 
 and polite manners. Their wares or their services 
 are no better, perhaps, than the stock in trade of 
 their crusty neighbors; but having undertaken a 
 business or adopted a profession, they are wise 
 enough to know that whatever is to be done sue- 
 
372 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 cessfully must be done in a pleasing manner and 
 with a good will. 
 
 Their acts appear to be based on the conviction 
 that every body may be made a friend, which is every 
 way preferable to acting as if every body were an 
 intruder. They do not treat people as though they 
 were in a hurry to be done with them, but as though 
 they might be cultivated into an acquaintance and 
 grow into a friend. To neglect the small courtesies 
 of life is to insure neglect for yourself. And the 
 reason that some persons are successful where others 
 fail is that they invite strangers to become friends by 
 civility, while the others repel even friends by the 
 want of courtesy. 
 
 The world at best is extremely selfish. We are 
 too much taken up with our own personal aims to 
 notice how others are thriving. We little think how 
 others may be wishing for some friendly recognition, 
 how far with them the friendly shake of the hand 
 may go. The world is full of suffering and sorrow, 
 and it is at these seasons that kindly words come with 
 far more than their usual force. The human heart 
 was formed for sympathy as naturally as the flower 
 for sunshine. Hence it is no wonder that the man 
 of affable and kind manners should be the one who 
 would make friends wherever he goes. 
 
 It is good to meet in friendly intercourse, and 
 pour out that social cheer which so vivifies the weary 
 and desponding heart. Give to all the hearty grasp 
 and the sunny smile. They send sunshine to the 
 soul, and make the heart leap as with new life and 
 
AFFABILITY. 373 
 
 joy. Thus may we become brothers in every good 
 word and deed, and peace and good-will spread in 
 the world. We long for friendly intercourse, and 
 when deprived of the society of others we pine and 
 grow sick at heart, we become misanthropic and 
 gloomy. The Summer of the heart changes to dreary 
 Winter, and our lives seem overcast and gloomy. 
 
 We are not well enough acquainted each with 
 each, and all with all. We are not social enough. 
 We are not found often enough at one another's 
 houses. We are especially delinquent in the duty 
 of calling upon such as come among us and connect 
 themselves with us. We do not welcome them, and 
 seek to make their stay as pleasant as possible. We 
 do not take the kindly notice we should of such as 
 come to our places of public and social gatherings. 
 This is wrong. It is incumbent on us as members 
 of society to cultivate a spirit of affability, to strive 
 to make all within our influence happy by our kind 
 solicitude for their welfare. Says Daniel Webster : 
 " We should make it a principle to extend the hand 
 of fellowship to every man who discharges faithfully 
 his duties and maintains good order, who manifests 
 a deep interest in the general welfare of society, 
 whose deportment is upright, and whose mind is in- 
 telligent, without stopping to ascertain whether he 
 swings a hammer or draws a thread." 
 
 As there is nothing to be lost and so much to be 
 gained by the exercise of affability, it is deeply to be 
 regretted that so few use it. To be affable does not 
 imply an indiscriminate taking into confidence, and 
 
374 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 imparting to third persons the secrets of your busi- 
 ness, at the same time expecting to be informed of 
 his. To do thus is mere simplicity, and is an utter 
 disregard of all cautious rules. But the friendly con- 
 versation, the hearty grasp of the hand, the feeling 
 of kindness and good-will which finds expression in 
 the tones, the willingness to do a favor cheerfully, — 
 these constitute true affability, which is not only of 
 value to the possessor, but may almost claim a place 
 among the Christian graces. 
 
 How many there are who are not in want of as- 
 sistance of material things, but who are yearning for 
 social recognition, who feel themselves shut out from 
 intercourse with their fellow-beings by the spirit of 
 selfishness which shows itself in a refusal of social 
 privileges ! It is so easy to become thoughtless in 
 this matter that each one should strive against the 
 feeling, and should constantly strive to make all 
 around him feel that he recognizes in them the man 
 or woman, an equal being with himself, and to meet 
 them with kindness by no means devoid of dignity, 
 but to let them see that he is moved by a spirit of 
 good-will towards all, and desires, as far as possible, 
 to do away with the distinction of rank or wealth, 
 and to meet with them on the plane of equality. 
 
 In urging affability we do not ignore the fact that 
 there are many to be found in every walk of life with 
 whom the less one has to do the better, that you 
 would as soon think of taking a serpent into the 
 bosom of your family as some people who infest soci- 
 ety. But this lamentable fact does not lessen the 
 
THE TOILET. 375 
 
 claims of affability, since, because you are fond of 
 fruit, you are not required to eat indiscriminately all 
 kinds of fruits, the good and also the bad, the nu- 
 tritious as well as the poisonous, but you are to 
 exercise a judicious elimination. So you are not 
 required to be frank, open-hearted, and sociable 
 with villains and blacklegs, the depraved and licen- 
 tious. To do this is to sink yourself to their level. 
 But a man may be a gentleman, and as such enti- 
 tled to recognition, though his coat be not of broad- 
 cloth or of the most fashionable make. And a real 
 lady, though clad in calico, is as worthy of frank 
 and courteous treatment as though robed in silk and 
 satins. 
 
 mm motti^M. 
 
 " Costly thy habit as thy purse can buy, 
 But not expressed in fancy; 
 Rich, not gaudy, 
 For the apparel oft proclaims the man." 
 
 — Shakespeare. 
 
 !|lpS the index tells us the contents of books, and 
 S directs to the particular chapter, even so does 
 if the outward habit and superficial order of gar- 
 ment denote the spirit and demonstratively point 
 out, like to a marginal note, the internal qualities of 
 the soul. 
 
 We believe it to be the duty of all, young and 
 old, to make their persons, as far as possible, agree- 
 
376 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 able to those with whom they are associated. If 
 possible, dress yourself fine where others are fine, 
 and plain where the apparel of others is plain. A 
 man who finds himself badly dressed amongst well- 
 dressed people feels awkward and ill at ease. He 
 stammers and is confused in speech. He makes all 
 manner of ridiculous blunders, and it is well-nigh 
 impossible for him to assume that air of simple dig- 
 nity which should characterize the bearing of a gen- 
 tleman. But it should be remembered that this 
 feeling should have nothing to do with dress proper; 
 it is only when there is a manifest impropriety in the 
 mode of dress. The dress should suit the time and 
 the occasion. The man in his work-shop or field, 
 or the lady, busied with the household duties, should 
 have no occasion to feel ill at ease, because not so 
 finely dressed as the casual caller. Such a feeling 
 should be instantly checked, since it is born of pride, 
 not of an innate desire to please others. 
 
 The love of beauty and refinement belongs to 
 every true woman, She ought to desire in modera- 
 tion pretty dresses, and delight in beautiful colors 
 and graceful fabrics. She ought to take a certain, 
 not too expensive, pride, in herself, and be solicitous 
 to have all belonging to her well chosen and in good 
 style. Many fail to understand the true object and 
 importance of this sentiment. Let no woman sup- 
 pose that any man, much less her husband, is indif- 
 ferent to her appearance. But women should con- 
 stantly beware lest what was meant as a means of 
 influence becomes a ruling passion. And let it be 
 
THE TOILET. 377 
 
 ever remembered that beauty of dress does not 
 reside in the material ; that time, place, and circum- 
 stances are all to be considered; that they may 
 look far more bewitching in the eyes of those whom 
 they are desirous to please when clad in neat calico 
 than if robed in silks and satins. And depend upon 
 it that the husband, wearied with his day's work, had 
 far rather find the wife neatly clad, doing or superin- 
 tending household duties, than, when dressed in the 
 height of fashion, she greets him to a home that 
 sadly needs an efficient, willing housekeeper. 
 
 Through dress the mind may be read, as through 
 the delicate tissue the lettered page. Women are 
 more like flowers than we think. In their dress and 
 adornments they express their natures, as the flow- 
 ers in their petals and colors. Some women are like 
 the modest daisies and violets — they never look or 
 feel better than when dressed in a morning wrapper. 
 When women are free to dress as they like, uncon- 
 trolled by others and not limited by their circum- 
 stances, they do not fail to express their true charac- 
 ters. A modest woman will dress modestly ; a really 
 refined and intelligent woman will bear the marks of 
 careful selections and faultless taste. 
 
 It is to be feared that many, both ladies and gen- 
 tlemen, fail to recognize the beautv which ahvavs ac- 
 companies simplicity. The stern simplicity of the 
 classic taste is seen in the statues and pictures of 
 the old masters. In Athens the ladies were not 
 gaudily, but simply arrayed, and we doubt whether 
 any ladies have ever excited more admiration. Fe- 
 
8 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 male loveliness never appears to so good advantage 
 as when set off by simplicity of dress. Tinselries 
 may serve to give effect on the stage or upon the 
 ball-room floor, but in daily life there is no substitute 
 for the charm of simplicity. A vulgar taste is not 
 to be disguised by gold and diamonds. The ab- 
 sence of a true taste and refinement of delicacy can 
 not be compensated by the possession of the most 
 princely trousseau. Mind measures gold, but gold 
 can not measure mind. Those who think that in 
 order to dress well it is necessary to dress extrava- 
 gantly or gaudily make a great mistake. Elegance 
 of dress does not depend upon expense. A lady 
 might wear the costliest silks that Italy could pro- 
 duce, adorn herself with laces from Brussels which 
 years of patient toil are required to fabricate ; she 
 might carry the jewels oi an Eastern princess around 
 her neck and upon her wrists and fingers,, yet still 
 in appearance be essentially vulgar. These are as 
 nothing without grace, without adaptation, without an 
 harmonious development oi colors, without the exer- 
 cise of discrimination and o-ood taste. 
 
 God has implanted in the minds of all, but espe- 
 cially in the female breast, the love of beauty, and one 
 way that this feeling finds expression is in the matter 
 o^ dress and personal adornment. We think that it 
 is the duty of all to clothe themselves in that style of 
 dress which most becomes them, provided that it does 
 not conflict with hygienic rules, and is warranted by 
 their circumstances. It is their duty, since when in 
 choice personal adornment they have a dignity and 
 
THE TOILET. 379 
 
 sense of personal elevation which they do not experi- 
 ence when in uncouth attire. Pride, of course, often 
 enters into fine dressing, and many women are fond of 
 flaunting their fine feathers in people's eyes ; but a 
 great majority love handsome dressing in obedience 
 to an instinct of refinement, in consequence of that 
 sense of personal purity which accompanies the wear- 
 ing of choice apparel. 
 
 To advise a young lady to dress herself with any 
 serious departure from the prevailing fashion of her 
 day and class is to advise her to incur a penalty 
 which may very probably be the wreck of her whole 
 life's happiness. But it is only the fault of public 
 opinion that any penalties at all follow innovations in 
 themselves sensible and modest. To train this pub- 
 lic opinion by degrees to bear with more variation of 
 costume, and especially to insist upon the principle 
 of fitness as the first requisite of beauty, should be 
 the aim of all sensible women. Nothing can be in 
 worse taste than for sensible women to wear clothes 
 by which their natural movements are impeded, and 
 their purposes, of whatever sort, thwarted by their 
 habiliments. 
 
 The styles of dress are so many and varied that 
 it would be a vain, as well as useless, attempt to 
 classify them. There is one principle running through 
 all which every woman should carefully consider. 
 Are your modes of dress in accordance with the 
 rules of hygiene ? This question you ought carefully 
 to consider, ever remembering that nature will allow 
 none of her laws to be violated in the name of fash- 
 
380 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 ion with impunity, and that every style of dress that 
 does not conform to the plainest of nature's teaching 
 should be frowned down upon by all sensible people. 
 
 Dress, to be in perfect taste, need not be costly. 
 It is to be regretted that in this age too much atten- 
 tion is paid to dress by those who have neither the 
 excuse of ample means nor of social culture. The 
 wife of a poorly paid clerk or of a young man just 
 starting in business aims at dressing as stylishly as 
 does the wealthiest among her acquaintances. Con- 
 sistency in regard to station and fortune is the first 
 matter to be considered. A woman of good sense 
 will not wish to expend in unnecessary extravagance 
 money wrung from an anxious husband ; or, if her 
 husband be a man of fortune, she will not even then 
 encroach upon her allowance. In the early years of 
 married life, when the income is moderate, it should 
 be the pride of a woman to see how little she can 
 spend upon her dress and yet present that tasteful 
 and creditable appearance which is desirable. 
 
 The dress of a gentleman never appears more 
 creditable than when characterized by simplicity. A 
 gentleman's taste in dress is shown in the avoidance 
 of all extravagance. A man of wit may sometimes 
 be a coxcomb, but a man of judgment and sense 
 never can be. A beau dressed out is like a cinna- 
 mon tree — the bark is worth more than the body. 
 A dandy is said to be the mercer's friend, the tailor's 
 fool, and his own foe. There are a thousand fops 
 made by art for one fool made by nature. 
 
 To judge from the actions of many of our young 
 
THE TOILET. 381 
 
 men one would suppose that dress was their highest 
 aim in life. Elegance of attire is, indeed, well, and, 
 when suitable to the surroundings, bespeaks the gen- 
 tleman. But men of sterling worth and character are 
 apt to have a feeling of contempt for the one who, 
 by his faultless attire and spruce manner, conclusively 
 shows that he is actuated by a dandy's view of life. 
 A coat that has the mark of use upon it is a recom- 
 mendation to people of sense, and a hat with too 
 much nap and too high a luster a derogatory cir- 
 cumstance. The best coats in our streets are worn 
 on the backs of penniless fops, broken-down mer- 
 chants, clerks with pitiful salaries, and men that do 
 not pay up. 
 
 Dandies and fops are like a body without soul, 
 powder without ball, lightning without thunderbolt, 
 paint on sand. There is much of this in the world. 
 We see it exemplified in every thing considered val- 
 uable. The counterfeiter gives the show of gold to 
 his base coin, and the show of value to his lying 
 bank note. The thief hangs out the appearance of 
 honesty in his face, and the liar is thunderstruck if 
 any body suspects him of equivocation. The bank- 
 rupt carries about with him the appearance of wealth. 
 The fop puts on the masquerade of dignity and im- 
 portance. The poor belle, whose mother washes to 
 buy her plumes, outshines the peeress of the court. 
 Many a table steams with costly viands for which 
 the last cent was paid ; and many a coat, sleek and 
 black, is worn on the street on which the tailor has 
 a moral mortgage. 
 
382 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 In the matter of dress, then, when we sum it all 
 up, we find that the love of dress is inherent in all 
 true men and women, and that it would be as unwise 
 as it would be useless to strive against it ; that, while 
 no man or woman should allow themselves to become 
 a slave to dress and fashion, still it is no less a duty 
 than it is a privilege to cultivate this love of adorn- 
 ment, ever keeping it within due bounds, remember- 
 ing that outward adornment should be but secondary 
 to the adornment of the soul with all noble and great 
 qualities. 
 
 
 IBfE may admire proofs of hardiness and assur- 
 ance, but we involuntarily attach ourselves to 
 simplicity and gentleness. Gentleness is like 
 the silent influence of light, which gives color 
 to all nature. It is far more powerful than loudness 
 or force, and far more beautiful. It pushes its way 
 silently and persistently, like the tiniest daffodil in 
 Spring, which raises the clod and thrusts it aside by 
 the simple persistence of growing. 
 
 It is to be feared that in this stirring age, when 
 we enumerate the elements of success, that we do not 
 lay stress enough on the milder virtues of simplicity 
 and gentleness. While fond of applauding the har- 
 dier virtues of energy, self-reliance, perseverance, 
 and others of a similar nature, we are in danger of 
 
GENTLENESS. 383 
 
 losing sight of the fact that ofttimes an exhibition 
 of gentleness and courtesy is not only extremely 
 pleasing in itself, but is not infrequently one of the 
 most expeditious and efficacious modes of advancing 
 present interests. 
 
 It is singular what power gentleness and courtesy 
 bestows on him who practices them. The most bois- 
 terous winds only cause the traveler to wrap his 
 cloak the closer to him, while the gentle rays of the 
 sun speedily induce him to discard it. And thus it 
 is with many of the pursuits of life, where sheer 
 force of intellect or intensity of application would oft- 
 times end only in a failure of plans and purposes, 
 gentleness, by its silent but powerful influence, will 
 not only excite a feeling of good will in the minds of 
 others, but as oil removes friction from a machine 
 and causes it to move smoothly, so will gentleness 
 remove apparently insurmountable objects from the 
 pathway of our success. 
 
 Gentleness belongs to virtue, and is to be care- 
 fully distinguished from the spirit of cowardice or the 
 fawning assents of sycophants. It removes no just 
 right from fear ; it gives no important truth to flat- 
 tery ; it is, indeed, not only consistent with a firm 
 mind, but it necessarily requires a manly spirit and a 
 fixed principle in order to give it any real value. 
 An able man shows his spirit by gentle words but 
 resolute actions. How often experience convinces us 
 that a bold and brazen loudness of tones and rough- 
 ness of manner cover only a vacillating spirit and 
 irresolute actions ! And on the other hand, do not 
 
384 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 history and observation show that quietness and gen- 
 tleness ofttimes mark the most determined of actions ? 
 The rarest bravery of all in the world is found actively 
 engaged accompanied by an exhibition of gentleness. 
 And ought we not so to expect it ? The person 
 moved by a spirit of gentleness throws all the energy 
 of his nature into action. It is not allowed to waste 
 in boisterousness, but is guided and directed in the 
 most appropriate channels by an understanding calm 
 and collected. 
 
 In the captain of a canal-boat we generally expect 
 gruffness of manner, loudness of tones, and a general 
 lack of refinement, dignity, and gentleness ; but in 
 the commander of an ocean steamer we shall always 
 find the quietness, gentleness, and dignity that we all 
 recognize as such a proper accompaniment of power. 
 So true it is that gentleness of manner is the most 
 appropriate and general expression of true greatness 
 and worth that we use the expression "a gentle man" 
 to express the highest type of worth in man. 
 
 In the mechanical world do we not always find 
 that the greater the exhibition of power the steadier 
 and quieter the movement becomes ? It is the rickety 
 engine of but few horse-powers that goes with a fizz 
 and a clatter, while the massive engine that supplies 
 the motive power for acres of machinery goes almost 
 noiselessly; and the sublimest exhibition of power in 
 the universe — the movement of the heavenly bodies — 
 proceeds in absolute quiet. We observe the same 
 effect in the moral world ; the master minds who 
 have moved kingdoms and swayed the thoughts of 
 
GENTLENESS. 385 
 
 millions are uniformly gentle and dignified in their 
 bearings. The loud-tongued and clatter-brained fa- 
 natics merely cause a movement in their immediate 
 vicinity. 
 
 There is a magic power in gentle words, the 
 potency of which but few natures are so icy as to 
 wholly resist. Would you have your home a cheer- 
 ful, hallowed spot, within which may be found that 
 happiness and peace which the world denies to its 
 votaries ? Let not loud, harsh words be uttered 
 within its walls. Let only gentle, quiet actions there 
 be found. Speak gently to the wearied husband, 
 who, with anxious brow, returns from the perplexi- 
 ties of his daily avocations ; and let him, in his turn, 
 speak gently to the care-worn woman and wife, who, 
 amid her never-ending round of little duties, finds 
 rest and encouragement in the sympathy of him 
 she loves. Speak gently to the wayward child. A 
 pleasant smile and a word of kindness will often re- 
 store good humor and playfulness. Human nature 
 is the same with it. It has its joys and sorrows as 
 well as those of mature growth, and its little heart 
 will quickly yield to the power of gentle, loving 
 kindness. 
 
 Hearts of children are, after all, much like flow- 
 ers ; they remain open to the softly falling dew, but 
 shut up in the violent downfalls of rain. Therefore, 
 when you have occasion to rebuke children, be care- 
 ful to do it with manifest kindness and gentleness. 
 The effect will be incalculably better. Speak gently 
 
 to the dependent who lightens your daily toil; kind 
 
 25 
 
386 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 words insure respect and affection, while the angry- 
 rebuke provokes impertinence and dislike. Speak 
 gently to the aged ones ; many are the trials through 
 which they have passed, and now, in a little while, 
 they will be missed from their accustomed places — 
 the spirit will have passed to its rest. The remem- 
 brance of an unkind word will then bring with it a 
 bitter sting. Speak gently to the erring one ; are 
 we not all weak and liable to err ? Temptation, of 
 which we can not judge, may have surrounded him. 
 Harshness will drive him on the sinful way; gentle- 
 ness may win him back to virtue. 
 
 True gentleness is founded on a sense of what 
 we owe to Him who made us, and to the common 
 nature of which we all share. It arises from reflec- 
 tion on our own failings and wants, and from just 
 views of the condition and duty of man. It is native 
 feelings, heightened and improved by principle. It 
 is not deficient in a sense of true worth and dignity, 
 but it recognizes in all men the possessors of infinite 
 possibilities, even the possibilities of eternal life ; and 
 it treats them as brethren. It summons to its high- 
 est and best form of expression all that is noble in 
 manhood, inspiring in purpose, grand in aim. and 
 walks proudly therein ; humbly, yet with an air of 
 conscious dignity; quietly, yet with the insignia of 
 power. 
 
 Since, then, true gentleness is thus significant 
 of power, thus potential for good, and is the high 
 and distinctive test of a gentleman, ought not all 
 the young earnestly strive to learn that spirit of 
 
MODESTY. 387 
 
 self-control, and accustom themselves to speak and 
 act gently at all times, and, by so doing, to act as 
 becomes a man and responsible being? 
 
 IjiT has been remarked that the modest deportment 
 <s^> of really wise men, when contrasted to the as- 
 
 m- suming air of the vain and ignorant, may be 
 compared to the difference of wheat, which, while 
 its ear is empty, holds up its head proudly, but as 
 soon as it is filled with grain bends modestly down 
 and withdraws from observation. Thus with true 
 worth and merit : it is uniformly modest in deport- 
 ment. It is only the shallow-pated who strive to at- 
 tract attention by pretentious claims. The ocean 
 depths are mute ; it is only along shallow shores that 
 the roar of the breakers is heard. 
 
 It is not difficult to draw the line between self- 
 reliance and modesty on the one hand, and self- 
 esteem and arrogant pretensions on the other. True 
 self-reliance does not call on all men to witness its 
 exploits. It displays itself in action. It may be re- 
 served in deportment, but quietly and modestly pro- 
 ceeds in the path that wisdom points out, with a 
 steady reliance on its own powers. Not so self- 
 esteem. Its boast is that it is sufficient for all 
 things ; which, to be sure, were not so bad, were it 
 not for the fact that, when put to the test by neces- 
 
388 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 sity, it so quickly abandons its pretentious claims, 
 and, forgetting to use its own powers, is anxious 
 only for the aid of others. 
 
 Modesty is a beautiful setting to the diamond of 
 talents and genius. The mark of the truly success- 
 ful man is absence of pretensions. He talks in only 
 ordinary business style, avoids all brag, dresses 
 plainly, promises not at all, performs much, speaks 
 monosyllables, hugs his fact. He calls his employ- 
 ment by its lowest name, and so takes from evil 
 tongues their sharpest weapon. Who made more 
 wide and sweeping discoveries, of more far-reaching 
 consequences, than Newton ? Yet listen to his modest 
 confession: "I know not what the world may think 
 of my labors, but to myself it seems as though I had 
 been but a child playing on the seashore, now finding 
 some pebble rather more polished, and now some 
 shell rather more agreeably variegated than another, 
 while the immense ocean of truth extended itself 
 unexplored before me." Thus it is always found that 
 modesty accompanies great merit, and it has even 
 been said that merit without modesty is generally 
 insolent in expression. 
 
 The greatest events in the world's history dawned 
 with no more noise than the morning star makes in 
 rising. All great developments complete themselves 
 in the world, and modestly wait in silence, praising 
 themselves never, and announcing themselves not at 
 all. If " honesty be the best policy," we can not 
 deny that modesty, as a matter of policy even, hath 
 a rare virtue. What so quickly commands our good 
 
MODESTY. 389 
 
 wishes as modesty struggling under discouragement? 
 what our sympathy more than modesty struck down 
 by affliction? or what our respect and love more than 
 modesty ministering to the distresses of others? 
 There is no surer passport to the favors of others 
 than modesty of deportment. It will succeed where 
 all else has failed to waken in the minds of others an 
 interest in our affairs. It is to merit as shades to 
 figures in a picture, giving it strength and beauty. 
 
 Modesty is not bashfulness, though the two are 
 often confounded. The bashfulness of timidity is 
 constitutional, the bashfulness of credulity is pitiable, 
 the bashfulness of ignorance is disreputable, but the 
 bashfulness allied to modesty is a charm. There are 
 two distinct sorts of bashfulness. The one is awk- 
 wardness joined to pride, which, on a further ac- 
 quaintance with the world, will be converted into the 
 pertness of a coxcomb. The other is closely allied 
 to modesty. It is a painful consciousness of self, 
 which is produced by our most delicate feelings, and 
 which the most extensive knowledge can not always 
 remove. In undermining and removing bashfulness, 
 due regard is to be had to the adjacent modesty, 
 good nature, and humanity, as those who pull down 
 private houses adjoining imposing buildings are care- 
 ful to prop up such parts as are endangered by the 
 removal. 
 
 Bashfulness in itself can not be admired. It com- 
 pletely distrusts its own powers, whereas we have 
 seen that a proper reliance on self is at all times 
 highly commendable. Bashfulness in man is never 
 
390 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 to be allowed as a good quality, but a weakness, 
 inasmuch as it suppresses his virtues and hides them 
 from the world, when, had he a mind to exert him- 
 self, he might accomplish much good. We doubt not 
 but there are many fine intellects passing for naught 
 by reason of their bashfulness. 
 
 Modesty is far different from reserve. Reserve 
 partakes more of the nature of sullen pride. It is 
 haughty in demeanor, and hath not the sweet, retir- 
 ing disposition of modesty. A reserved man is in 
 continual conflict with the social part of his nature, 
 and even grudges himself the laugh into which he is 
 sometimes betrayed. The modest man does not 
 refuse to perform his part socially. His only dread 
 is that others may think he is trying to center atten- 
 tion on himself. The really modest man may be the 
 most social of men. The reserved man thinks it is 
 beneath him to mingle with the mass of the people. 
 
 Modesty never counsels real merit to conceal 
 itself. It never bids one refuse to act when action 
 is necessary, and the person is conscious that his 
 powers are adequate for the performance of the task. 
 Nor when a good deed is to be done should the 
 modest man hesitate to come forward to do it, pro- 
 viding he is capable of so doing. Modesty counsels 
 none to be backwards where duty points the way ; 
 but modesty strictly forbids that when a good or 
 meritorious action is done that the performer should 
 spread abroad the story of his doings. Leave that 
 for others to do. 
 
 Modesty is the crowning ornament of womanly 
 
LOVE. 391 
 
 beauty, and the honor of manly powers. It alike 
 becomes every age, giving new grace to youthful 
 figures, and imparting a pleasing virtue to years. It 
 softens the asperities of poverty and is a beautiful 
 setting for wealth and fortune. It gives additional 
 charms to the possessor of genius and talents, or 
 cunningly conceals the want of the same. It is the 
 key that unlocks alike the gate to success or the door 
 of love and respect. It makes life pleasant to the 
 one who exercises the virtue, and charities bestowed 
 by its hand are worth far more to the recipient than 
 their mere pecuniary value. 
 
 "Life without love! Oh, it would be 
 A world without a sun — 
 Cold as the snow-capped mountain, dark 
 As myriad nights in one; 
 A barren scene, without one spot 
 Amidst the waste, 
 Without one blossom of delight, 
 Of feeling, or of taste !" 
 
 ||||OVE in one form or another is the ruling element 
 in life. It is the primary source from whence 
 springs all that possesses any real value to 
 man. It may be the love of dominion or power 
 which, though utterly selfish in its aims and meth- 
 ods, has been most marvelously overruled for good 
 
392 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 in the world's history. It may be the love of knowl- 
 edge, in the pursuit of which lives have been lost 
 and fortunes spent ; but grand secrets have been 
 wrung from nature — secrets which have contributed 
 much for the advancement of human interests. But 
 the love grander than any other, before which all the 
 other elements of civilization pale and dwarf to utter 
 insignificance, which is as powerful to-day as in the 
 morning of time, which will continue to rule until time 
 is ended, is that indefinable, indescribable, ever 
 fresh and beautiful love betwixt man and woman — 
 that love which has the power to tame the savage's 
 heart ; which finds man rough, uncultivated, and 
 selfish ; which leaves him a refined and courteous 
 gentleman ; which transforms the timid, bashful girl 
 to the woman of matchless power for good. 
 
 Love is an actual need, an urgent requirement of 
 the heart. Every properly constituted human being 
 who entertains an appreciation of loneliness and 
 wretchedness, and looks forward to happiness and 
 content, feels a necessity of loving. Without it life 
 is unfinished and hope is without aim, nature is 
 defective and man miserable ; nor does he come to 
 comprehend the end and glory of existence until he 
 has experienced the fullness of a love that actualizes 
 all indefinite cravings and expectations. Love is the 
 great instrument of nature, the bond and cement of 
 society, the spirit and spring of the universe. It is 
 such an affection as can not so properly be said to 
 be in the soul as the soul to be in that. It is the 
 whole nature wrapped up in one desire. Love is the 
 
love, 393 
 
 sun of life, most beautiful in the morning and even- 
 ing, but warmest and steadiest at noon. 
 
 Love blends young hearts in blissful unity, and 
 for the time so ignores past ties and affections as to 
 make a willing separation of the son from his father's 
 house, and the daughter from all the sweet endear- 
 ments of her childhood's home, to go out together 
 and rear for themselves an altar, around which shall 
 cluster all the cares and delights, the anxieties and 
 sympathies of the family relationship. This love, if 
 pure, unselfish, and discreet, constitutes the chief 
 usefulness and happiness of human life. Without it 
 there would be no organized households, and, conse- 
 quently, none of that earnest endeavor for a compe- 
 tence and respectability, which is the mainspring to 
 human efforts, none of those sweet, softening, re- 
 straining, and elevating influences of domestic life, 
 which can alone fill the earth with the happy influ- 
 ences of refinement. 
 
 Love, it has been said, in the common acceptance 
 of the term is folly; but love in its purity, its lofti- 
 ness, its unselfishness is not only a consequence, but 
 a proof of our moral excellence. The sensibility to 
 moral beauty, the forgetfulness of self in the admira- 
 tion engendered by it, all prove its claim to a high 
 moral influence. It is the triumph of the unselfish 
 over the selfish part of our nature. No man and no 
 woman can be regarded as complete in their experi- 
 ence of life until they have been subdued into union 
 with the world through their affections. As woman 
 is not woman until she has known love, neither is 
 
394 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 man a complete man. Both are requisite to each 
 other's completeness. 
 
 Love is the weapon which Omnipotence reserved 
 to conquer rebel man when all the rest had failed. 
 Reason he parries ; fear he answers blow to blow ; 
 future interests he meets with present pleasure ; but 
 love, that sun against whose melting beams Winter 
 can not stand, that soft, subduing slumber which 
 brings down the giant, there is not one human soul 
 in a million, not a thousand men in all earth's do- 
 main whose earthly hearts are hardened against love. 
 There needs no other proof that happiness is the 
 most wholesome moral atmosphere, and that in which 
 the morality of man is destined ultimately to thrive, 
 than the elevation of soul, the religious aspirations 
 which attend the first assurance, the first sober cer- 
 tainty of true love. 
 
 Love is the perpetual melody of humanity. It 
 sheds its effulgence upon youth, and throws a halo 
 around age. It glorifies the present by the light it 
 casts backward, and it lightens the future by the 
 gleams sent forward. The love which is the outcome 
 of esteem has the most elevating and purifying effect 
 on the character. It tends to emancipate one from 
 the slavery of self. It is altogether unsordid ; itself 
 is the only price. It inspires gentleness, sympathy, 
 mutual faith, and confidence. True love also in a 
 manner elevates the intellect. "All love renders 
 wise in a degree," says the poet Browning, and the 
 most gifted minds have been the truest lovers. Great 
 souls make all affections great ; they elevate and con- 
 
love. 395 
 
 secrate all true delights. Love even brings to light 
 qualities before lying dormant and unsuspected. It 
 elevates the aspirations, expands the soul, and stimu- 
 lates the mental powers. 
 
 It were fitting that the nature of this affection, 
 which has such power for good or ill, be thoroughly 
 understood, and endeavors made to guide it in right 
 channels. For love, as it is of the first enjoyment, so 
 it is frequently of the deepest distress. If it is 
 placed upon an unworthy object, and the discovery 
 is made too late, the heart can never know peace. 
 Every hour increases the torments of reflection, and 
 hope, that soothes the severest ills, is here turned 
 into deep despair. But, strange to say, though it is 
 one of universal and engrossing interest to hu- 
 manity, the moralist avoids it, the educator shuns it, 
 and parents taboo it. It is considered almost indeli- 
 cate to refer to love as between the sexes, and young 
 persons are left to gather their only notions of it from 
 the impossible love stories that fill the shelves of 
 circulating libraries. This strong and absorbing feel- 
 ing, which nature has for wise purposes made so 
 strong in woman that it colors her whole life and his- 
 tory, though it may form but an episode in the life of 
 man, is usually left to follow its own inclination, and 
 to grow up for the most part unchecked, without 
 any guidance or direction whatever. 
 
 Although nature spurns all formal rules and di- 
 rections in affairs of love ; though love triumphs over 
 reason, resists all persuasion, and scorns every dic- 
 tate of philosophy; and though, like a fabled tree or 
 
396 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 plant, it may be cut down at night, but ere morning 
 it will be found to have sprouted up again in renewed 
 freshness and beauty, with its leaves and branches 
 re-expanded to the air and laden with blossoms and 
 fruits ; still, at all events, it were best to instill in 
 young minds such views of character as should ena- 
 ble them to discriminate between the true and the 
 false, and to accustom them to hold in esteem those 
 qualities of moral purity and integrity without which 
 life is but a scene of folly and misery. It may not 
 be possible to teach young people to love wisely, but 
 they may at least be guarded by parental advice 
 against the frivolous and despicable passions which 
 so often usurp its name. 
 
 Genuine love is founded on esteem and respect. 
 You can not long love one for whom you have not 
 these feelings. The most beautiful may be the most 
 admired and caressed, but they are not always the 
 most esteemed and loved. We discover great beauty 
 in those who are not beautiful, if they possess geu- 
 uine truthfulness, simplicity, and sincerity. No de- 
 formity is present where vanity and affectation is 
 absent, and we are unconscious of the want of charms 
 in those who have the power of fascinating us by 
 something ' more real and permanent than external 
 attractions and transitory shows. 
 
 Remember that love is dependent upon forms ; 
 courtesy of etiquette must guard and protect court- 
 esy of heart. How many hearts have been lost 
 irrecoverably and how many averted eyes and cold 
 looks have been gained from what seemed, perhaps, 
 
love. 397 
 
 but a trifling negligence of forms. Love is a tender 
 plant and can not bear cold neglect. It requires 
 kind acts and thoughtful attentions, one to the other, 
 and thrives at its best only when surrounded by an 
 atmosphere of disinterested courtesy. 
 
 The love of woman is a stronger power and a 
 sweeter thing than that of man. Men and women 
 can not be judged by the same rules. There are 
 many radical differences in their affectional natures. 
 Man is the creature of interest and ambition. His 
 nature leads him forth into the struggle and bustle 
 of the great world. Love is but the embellishment 
 of his early life, or a song piped in the interval of 
 the acts. He seeks for fame, for fortune, for space 
 in the world's thoughts, and dominion over his fellow- 
 men. But a woman's whole life is a history of the 
 affections. The heart is her world ; it is there her 
 ambition strives for empire; it is there her nature 
 seeks for love and kindness. She sends forth her 
 sympathies on adventure ; she embarks her whole 
 soul in the traffic of affection, and if shipwrecked her 
 case is hopeless, for it is the bankruptcy of a heart. 
 
 Woman's love is stronger than man's because she 
 sacrifices more. For every woman is with the food 
 of the heart as with the food of her body ; it is pos- 
 sible to exist on a very small quantity, but this small 
 quantity is an absolute necessity. The love of a 
 pure, true woman has brightened some of the darkest 
 scenes in the world's history. It inspires them with 
 courage and incites them to actions utterly foreign 
 to their shrinking dispositions. Who can estimate 
 
398 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 the value of a woman's affections? Gold can not 
 purchase a gem so precious. In our most cheer- 
 less moments, when disappointments and care crowd 
 round the heart, and even the gaunt form of poverty 
 menaces with his skeleton fingers, it gleams round 
 the soul like sunlight in dark places. It follows the 
 prisoner into the gloomy cell, and in the silence of 
 midnight it plays around his heart, and in his dreams 
 he folds to his bosom the form of her who loves him 
 still, though the world has turned coldly from him. 
 
 Love purifies the heart from self; it strengthens 
 and ennobles the character, gives higher motives and 
 a nobler aim to every action of life, and makes both 
 man and woman strong, noble, and courageous ; and 
 the power to love truly and devotedly is the noblest 
 gift with which a human being can be endowed, but 
 it is a sacred fire and not to be burned before idols. 
 Disinterested love is beautiful and noble. How high 
 will it not rise! How many injuries will it not for- 
 give ! What obstacles will it not overcome, and what 
 sacrifices will it not make rather than give up the 
 being upon which it has been once wholly and truth- 
 fully fixed! 
 
 It is difficult to know at what moment love begins ; 
 it is less difficult to know it has begun. A thousand 
 messengers betray it to the eye. Tone, act, attitude, 
 and look, the signals upon the countenance, the elec- 
 tric telegraph of touch, all betray the yielding citadel. 
 And there is nothing holier in this life of ours than 
 the first consciousness of love, the first fluttering of 
 its silken wings, the first rising sound of that wind 
 
love. 399 
 
 which is so soon to sweep through the soul to purify 
 or to destroy. Love is thus a power, potent for good, 
 but, debased and corrupted, is as potent for evil. 
 If it brings joys it may also conduce to exquisite 
 anguish. A disappointment in love is more hard to 
 get over than any other ; the passion itself so softens 
 and subdues the heart that it disables it from strug- 
 gling or bearing up against the woes and distresses 
 which befall it. The mind meets with other mis- 
 fortune in her whole strength ; she stands collected 
 within herself and sustains the shock with all the 
 force which is natural to her. But a heart crossed 
 in love has its foundation sapped, and immediately 
 sinks under the weight of accidents that are disagree- 
 able to its favorite passion. 
 
 When time brings us to the resting-places of 
 life — and we all expect them, and, in some measure, 
 attain them — when we pause to consider its ways 
 and to study its import, we then look back over the 
 waste ground which we have left behind us. Is a 
 bright spot to be seen there ? It is where the star 
 of love has shed its beams. Is there a plant, a 
 flower, or any beautiful thing visible? It is where 
 the smiles and tears of affection have been spent — 
 where some fond eye met our own, some endearing 
 heart was clasped to ours. Take these away and 
 what joy has memory in retrospection, or what de- 
 light has hope in future prospects? The bosom 
 which does not feel love is cold; the mind which 
 does not conceive it is dull; the philosophy which 
 does not accept it is false ; and the only true religion 
 
400 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 in the world has pure, reciprocal, and undying love 
 for its basis. The loves that make memory happy 
 and home beautiful are those which form the sun- 
 light of our earlier years ; they beam gratefully along 
 the pathway of our mature years, and their radiance 
 lingers till the shadows of death darken them all to- 
 gether. 
 
 
 |ffi||HERE is an unfortunate tendency in human na- 
 e ^» ture to treat with levity many questions most 
 W vitally affecting man's real happiness. Thus in 
 the questions of love, courtship, and marriage — 
 questions than which none could be more important — 
 it is to be deeply regretted that men and women do 
 not more carefully consider the wisdom of their course, 
 do not reflect whether they are guided by the light 
 of calm, sober sense or are leaving things to impulse. 
 It has been wisely but sadly said that years are 
 necessary to cement a friendship ; but months, and 
 sometimes weeks, and even days, are sufficient to 
 prepare for that holier state of matrimony. From 
 false regard to public opinion, or as a matter of con- 
 venience, or for the mere purpose of securing a home 
 and being settled in life, thousands enter into the 
 most sacred of human relationships with no such 
 feelings as will enable them to bear the burdens 
 which it brings. 
 
I V 
 
COURTSHIP. 401 
 
 Love and courtship should be to wedded love 
 what a blossom is to the perfected fruit. The power 
 of this love must be measured, not by its intensity, 
 but by its effects — by its beneficence in bringing into 
 play a higher range of motives, by the facilities it 
 unfolds, by its skill in harmonizing different natures. 
 Not once in a hundred times do two natures brought 
 side by side harmonize in every part. Of nothing 
 are people more ignorant than of human nature. 
 Very rich and fruitful natures are often side by side 
 with very barren ones ; noble ones, with those that 
 are sordid ; exquisitely sensitive, with those coarse 
 and rude. This is a consequence to be foreseen from 
 the want of thought evinced by people when about 
 to marry. 
 
 Many counsel the young not to expect too much 
 from love. That is an evil philosophy, however, which 
 advises to moderation by undervaluing the possibil- 
 ities of a true and glorious love. Happiness in this 
 life depends more upon the capacity of loving than 
 on any other single quality. If men lose all the 
 treasures of love, it does not prove that the treasure 
 is not to be found, but that they have not sought 
 aright. In love there are many apartments ; but not 
 to selfishness, sensuality, or arrogance will love yield 
 its richest treasures. True love is social regenera- 
 tion. It is a revolution ending with a new king, and 
 a reconstruction of the soul. 
 
 The way of selfishness is self-seeking; that of 
 
 love, self-sacrifice. It is this self-sacrificing spirit of 
 
 love that can alone perpetuate its influence and estab- 
 
 26 
 
402 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 lish its worth and blessedness. True wisdom, then, 
 will say to the young, Love, but love not blindly. 
 Justice is represented as blind, in order that, under 
 no circumstances, can she swerve one hair's-breadth 
 from the right, from personal favor or prejudice ; but 
 Love, on the contrary, should use his eyes to the 
 fullest extent, in order that, in days of courtship, no 
 stumbling-block may be left to become a torment 
 after marriage. 
 
 A moment's consideration will show how utterly 
 repugnant it is to all manly feelings to jest in this 
 matter. It is one of the most serious concerns of 
 life. Your weal or woe and the weal or woe of those 
 who shall come after you, and the influence you shall 
 exert upon the world, depend, in a great measure, 
 upon the wisdom and virtue with which you conduct 
 your preparation for marriage. All true minds see 
 the manifest impropriety of jesting about the most 
 delicate, serious, and sacred relation and feeling of 
 human experience. The whole tendency of such 
 lightness is to cause the marriage relation to be 
 lightly esteemed and the true aim of courtship to be 
 lost sight of. Until it is viewed in its true light, 
 with that sober earnestness which the subject de- 
 mands, courtship will be nothing else than a grand 
 game of hypocrisy, resulting in misery the most 
 deplorable. 
 
 Courtships are sweet and dreamy thresholds of 
 unseen temples, where half the world has paused in 
 couples, talked in whispers under the moonlight, 
 passed on, but never returned. It should be to all 
 
COURTSHIP. 403 
 
 but the entrance to scenes of happiness and content. 
 But, alas ! in the history of many we know that such 
 is not the case. We have been but poor observers 
 if we fail to recognize that marriage is not necessarily 
 a blessing. It may be the bitterest curse ; it may 
 sting like an adder and bite like a serpent. Its 
 bower is as often made of thorns as of roses. It 
 blasts as many sunny expectations as it realizes, and 
 an illy mated human pair is the most woeful picture 
 of wretchedness that is presented in the book of life ; 
 and yet such pictures are plenty. 
 
 It becomes all young men and women, who are 
 standing where the radiant beams of love are just 
 beginning to gild the pathway before them, to en- 
 deavor to ascertain, with the aid of others' experi- 
 ence, with calm and careful consideration, with an 
 appeal for guidance from on high, whether the person 
 he or she proposes to unite their destiny to is the 
 one with whom, of all the world, they are best 
 adapted to make the journey. If, as the result of 
 such reflection, they are convinced that the choice is 
 wise, they may with confidence proceed to take upon 
 themselves the duties and privileges of the marriage 
 relation. But if such observation shows that they 
 have heretofore erred, as they value their future hap- 
 piness and the happiness of others, let them stop 
 before the vow is said that indissolubly unites their 
 fate with another's. 
 
 Marriage should be made a study. Every youth, 
 both male and female, should so consider it. It is 
 the grand social institution of humanity. Its laws 
 
404 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 and relations are ot momentous importance to the 
 race. Should it be entered blindly, in total ignorance 
 of what it is, what its conditions of happiness are ? 
 The object of courtship is not to woo ; it is not to 
 charm, gratify, or please, simply for the present 
 pleasure. It is simply for the selection of a life com- 
 panion — one who must bear, suffer, and enjoy life 
 with us in all of its forms ; in its frowns as well as 
 smiles, joys, and sorrows — one who will walk pleas- 
 antly, willingly, and confidingly by our side through 
 all the intricate and changing vicissitudes incident to 
 mortal life. 
 
 What is to be sought is a companion, a congenial 
 spirit, one possessed of an interior constitution of 
 soul similiar to our own, of similar age, opinions, 
 tastes, habits, modes of thought and feeling. A con- 
 genial spirit is one who, under any given combination 
 of circumstances, would be affected, feel, and act as 
 we ourselves would ; it is one who would approve 
 what we approve and condemn what we condemn, 
 not for the purpose of agreeing with us, but of his or 
 her own free will. This is a companion who is already 
 united to us by the ties of spiritual harmony, which 
 union it is the object of courtship to discover. 
 
 Courtship, then, is a voyage of discovery or a 
 court of inquiry, established by mutual consent of the 
 parties, to see wherein and to what extent there is a 
 harmony existing. If in all these they honestly and 
 harmoniously agree, and find a deep and thrilling 
 pleasure in their agreement, find their union of senti- 
 ment to give a charm to their social intercourse; if 
 
COURTSHIP. 405 
 
 now they feel that their hearts are bound as well as 
 their sentiments in a holy unity, and that for each 
 other they would live and labor and make every per- 
 sonal sacrifice with gladness, and that without each 
 other they know not how to live, it is their privilege, 
 yes, their duty to form a matrimonial alliance. 
 
 The true companion has to be sought for. She 
 does not parade herself as store goods. She is not 
 fashionable. Generally she is not rich. But, oh ! 
 what a heart she has when you find her — so large 
 and pure and womanly. When you see it you won- 
 der if those showy things outside were really women. 
 Courtship is the brilliant scene in the maiden life of a 
 woman. It is to her a garden where no weeds mingle 
 with the flowers, but all is lovely and beautiful to the 
 sense. It is a dish of nightingales served up by 
 moonlight to the mingled music of many tendernesses 
 and gentle whisperings and eagerness, that does not 
 outstep the bounds of delicacy. 
 
 Courtship is the first turning point in the life of 
 a woman, crowded with perils and temptation. The 
 rose tints of affection dazzle and bewilder the imagi- 
 nation, and while always bearing in mind that life 
 without love is a wilderness, it should not be over- 
 looked that true affection requires solid support. 
 Discretion tempers passion, and it is precisely this 
 quality which oftener than any other is found to be 
 absent in courtship. Young persons require wise 
 counselors. They should not trust too much to the 
 impulse of the heart, nor be too easily captivated by 
 a winning exterior. 
 
406 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 In the selection of a wife a pure, loving heart 
 and good common sense are many times more valu- 
 able than personal beauty or wealth. Once installed 
 in the affections of such a lady, you have a life claim 
 on her good offices. No sacrifice she can make is 
 too great, no adversity so stern that it can shake 
 her firmness or hopefulness. Such a woman is a 
 helpmeet as the Creator designed a wife to be. It 
 is an error, which has proved fatal to many young 
 lives, to marry one whom you consider your inferior 
 in mind or body. A wife has the power to make or 
 destroy the home, and a weak heart and shallow 
 brain can never have the former effect. 
 
 There can be no such a thing as interchange of 
 sentiment where she does not appreciate your high- 
 est thoughts. Can you reveal to her the sacred 
 treasures of mind, which lie hidden from the careless 
 gaze of others, and be assured of her sympathy? 
 Can she walk hand in hand with you as her equal, 
 honored above all women ? Is she fit to sit in your 
 household as a shining light, respected for her gentle 
 dignity and the wisdom of her management and con- 
 versation ? The quiet, reserved girl does not always 
 possess these qualifications ; neither does the bright, 
 gay creature, whose presence throws a halo over her 
 surroundings. The poor are no more likely to have 
 the proper gifts and trainings than those who never 
 knew a wish ungratified. But any woman of noble 
 principles, a warm heart, and good common sense 
 to guide her can easily reach the standard. 
 
 There is equal danger before the young lady in 
 
COURTSHIP. 407 
 
 her choice of a husband. Young men inclined to 
 intemperate habits, even but slightly so, as they have 
 not sufficient moral stamina to enable them to resist 
 temptation even in its incipient stages, and are conse- 
 quently deficient in self-respect, can not possess that 
 pure, uncontaminated feeling which alone capacitates 
 a man for rightly appreciating the tender and loving 
 nature of a true woman. 
 
 It is equally fatal for a woman to marry a man who 
 is her inferior. She of necessity descends to his level. 
 Being his superior in every good sense of the word, 
 she can not have for him that high feeling of regard 
 which every wife should have for her husband. Lack- 
 ing that, love too soon fades away, and only the du- 
 ties of married life remain ; its pleasures are all gone. 
 What is wanted in both is a true companion ; not one 
 who possesses wealth, not necessarily the possessor 
 of a scholastic education, but one who has a pure, 
 warm heart and good common sense. 
 
 A true courtship is with all a beautiful sight. 
 Only the coarse and illiterate can there see aught 
 for ridicule or unseemly jest. It is the flowing to- 
 gether of two separate lives that have heretofore 
 been divided, now mysteriously brought together to 
 flow on through all time, and only God in his infinite 
 wisdom knows how far in the shadowy hereafter. 
 
408 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 |HE marriage ceremony is one of the most inter- 
 esting and solemn spectacles that social life 
 presents. To see two rational creatures, in the 
 glow of youth and hope which invests life in a 
 halo of happiness, appear together and ac- 
 knowledge their preference for each other, voluntarily 
 enter into a league of perpetual friendship and amity, 
 and call on all to witness the sanctity of their vows, 
 awakens deep feeling in the hearts of all beholders. 
 A holy influence is felt to pervade the place ; the 
 spirit of the hour is sacramental. 
 
 Though mirth may abound before and after the 
 irrevocable formula is spoken, yet at that particular 
 point of time there is a shadow on the most laughing 
 lip, a moisture in the firmest eye ; and it may well 
 be so. To think of the endearing relations, and the 
 important consequences which are to flow from it as 
 the couple walk side by side through life, participat- 
 ing in the same joys and sharing the same sorrows, 
 two weak, frail human natures thus taking upon them- 
 selves, in the sight of God and man, the weighty 
 duties of a new and untried state of existence, exerts 
 a solemn influence on all. 
 
 All pictures of human happiness represent sorrow 
 in the background. Thus the wedding ceremony. 
 True, it is considered an occasion of great joy ; but 
 there remains the thought, the smile that kindles to 
 ecstasy at their union will at last be quenched in the 
 
MARRIAGE. 409 
 
 tears of the survivor. Man may unite, but death 
 only separates. If from this proceed some of the 
 deepest joys of life, from hence also come not unfre- 
 quently the deepest sorrows. 
 
 There is no one thing more lovely in this life, 
 more full of the divinest courage, than when a young 
 maiden — from her past life ; from her happy child- 
 hood, when she rambled over every field and moor 
 around her home; when a mother anticipated her 
 wants and soothed her little cares ; when brothers 
 and sisters grew from merry playmates to loving, 
 trustful friends ; from the Christmas gatherings and 
 romps, the festival in bower or garden ; from the 
 rooms sanctified by the death of relatives ; from the 
 holy and secure background of her early life — looks 
 out into a dark and unknown future, away from all 
 that, and yet unterrified, undaunted, undertakes the 
 journey, with a trusting confidence in the one beside 
 her. Buoyed up with the confidence of requited love, 
 she bids a fond and grateful adieu to the life that is 
 passed, she turns with excited hopes and joyful an- 
 ticipations of happiness to what is to come. 
 
 Then woe to the man who can blast such hopes, 
 who can break the illusions that have won her, and 
 destroy the confidence which his love inspired ! Mar- 
 riage offers the most effective opportunity for spoiling 
 the life of another. Nobody can debase, harass, and 
 ruin a woman as her own husband, and nobody can 
 do a tithe as much to chill a man's aspiration for 
 good, to paralyze his energies, as his wife ; and a 
 man is never irretrievablv ruined in his prospects till 
 
410 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 he marries a bad woman. Perhaps there is no hour 
 in the life of a man or woman more potential for weal 
 or woe than the marriage hour. That is the hour 
 from whence most men can date their success or fail- 
 ure ; for while nothing is a greater incentive to a 
 man to put forth all his exertions than for the sake 
 of his wife, and while her society is the place where 
 he forgets the cares of the world, and in its quiet rest 
 finds new courage to take up life's load, yet has a 
 .wife equal power for ill. 
 
 Be a man ever so ambitious, energetic, or industri- 
 ous, yet with a careless or spendthrift wife his best 
 efforts for success are vain. And nothing will sooner 
 discourage a man than a wife too ignorant or too 
 careless to understand, appreciate, and sympathize 
 with his, efforts. And for the woman, too, it is at 
 once the happiest and saddest hour of her life. It is 
 the promise of future bliss, raised on the death of all 
 present enjoyment. She quits her home, her par- 
 ents, her companions, her occupation, her amuse- 
 ments, her every thing upon which she has hitherto 
 depended for comfort, for affection, for kindness, for 
 pleasure. 
 
 With the marriage ceremony she enters a new 
 world ; but it is with her a world from whence she 
 can not return. If the man of her choice be an up- 
 right, pure man, with manly traits of character, indus- 
 trious and honest, in the majority of cases she is to 
 blame if it be not to her a world of happiness. But 
 if she has erred, and she finds herself bound for life 
 with one inferior to her, or who is enslaved to habit 
 
MARRIAGE. 411 
 
 or temper, or destitute of manly attributes, God help 
 her ! Her future is full of misery. 
 
 A man's moral character is necessarily powerfully 
 influenced by his wife. A lower nature will drag 
 him down, as a higher one will lift him up. The 
 former will deaden his sympathies, dissipate his ener- 
 gies, and distort his life, while the latter, by satisfy- 
 ing his affections, will strengthen his moral nature, 
 and, by giving him repose, tend to energize his in- 
 tellect. Not only so, but a woman of high principle 
 will insensibly elevate the aim and purpose of her 
 husband, as one of low principles will unconsciously 
 degrade them. In the course of life we may see even 
 a weak man display real public virtue, because he 
 had by his side a woman of noble character, who 
 sustained him in his career, and exercised a fortifying 
 influence on his views of public duty ; while, on the 
 contrary, all have often witnessed men of grand and 
 generous instincts transformed into vulgar self-seek- 
 ers by contact with women of narrow natures, de- 
 voted to an imbecile love of pleasure, and from whose 
 minds the grand motive of duty was altogether ab- 
 sent. As wives may exercise a great moral influence 
 upon their husbands, so, on the other hand, there are 
 few men strong enough to resist the influence of a 
 lower character in a wife. If she does not sustain 
 and elevate what is highest in his nature, she will 
 speedily reduce him to her own level. Thus a wife 
 may be the making or unmaking of the best of men. 
 It is by the regimen of the domestic affections 
 that the heart of man is best composed and regulated. 
 
412 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 The home is the woman's kingdom, her state, her 
 world where she governs^ by affection, by kindness, 
 by the power of gentleness. There is nothing which 
 so settles the turbulence of a man's nature as his 
 union in life with a high-minded woman. There he 
 finds rest, contentment, and happiness — rest of brain 
 and peace of spirit. He will also often find in her 
 his best counselor ; for her instinctive tact will usually 
 lead him right, where his own unaided reason might 
 be apt to go wrong. 
 
 The true wife is a staff to lean upon in times of 
 trial and difficulty, and she is never wanting in sym- 
 pathy and solace when distress occurs or fortune 
 frowns. In the time of youth she is a comfort and 
 an ornament of man's life, and she remains a faithful 
 helpmate in maturer years, when life has ceased to 
 be in anticipation, and we live in its realities. Of all 
 the institutions that effect human weal or woe on 
 earth none is more important than marriage. It is 
 the foundation of the great social fabric, and conceals 
 within its mystic relations the coiled secrets of the 
 largest proportion of happiness and misery connected 
 with the lot of man. 
 
 Marriage, to be a blessing, must be properly en- 
 tered. It has its fundamental laws, which must be 
 obeyed. It is not a mysterious, wonder-working in- 
 stitution of the Almighty, which can not be studied 
 by the common mind, but a simple necessity laid in 
 man's social nature, which may be read and under- 
 stood of all men who will investigate that nature. 
 The reasons for every enjoyment of the matrimonial 
 
MARRIAGE. 413 
 
 life may be understood before entering upon its 
 relations. The conditions upon which its joys and 
 advantages are realized may be learned beforehand. 
 It should not be entered in blindness, but rather in 
 the daylight of a perfect knowledge of its rules and 
 regulations, its promises and conditions, its laws and 
 privileges, so that no uncertainty shall attend its 
 realization, no unhappy revealments shall follow a 
 knowledge of its reality. 
 
 Marriage, then, should be made a study. Every 
 youth, both male and female, should so consider it. 
 It is the grand social- institution of humanity. Its 
 laws and relations are of momentous importance to 
 the race. Shall it be entered blindly, in total igno- 
 rance of what it is, what its conditions of happiness 
 are? Its relations involve some of the most stern 
 duties and acts of self-denial that men are called 
 upon to perform. Shall youth enter upon its rela- 
 tions without a knowledge of these duties? For all 
 the professions, trades, and callings in life men and 
 women prepare themselves by previous attention to 
 their principles and duties. They study them, — de- 
 vote time and money to them. Every imaginable 
 case of difficulty or trial is considered and duly dis- 
 posed of according to the general principles of the 
 trade or profession. But marriage — incomparably 
 the most important and holy relation of life, involv- 
 ing the most sacred responsibilities and influences, 
 social, civil, and religious, that bear upon men — is 
 entered upon in hot haste or blind stupidity, by a 
 great majority of youth. 
 
414 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 No young man has any right to ask a young 
 woman to enter the matrimonial bonds with him till 
 he is thoroughly acquainted with the female constitu- 
 tion and character. Woman loves the strong, the 
 resolute, and the vigorous in man. To these quali- 
 ties she looks for protection. Under the shadow of 
 their wings she feels secure. But she wants them 
 blended with the tender, the sensitive, and the lofty 
 in sentiment. Her companionship, her joy, she finds 
 in these sentiments. Where she finds these she pours 
 the full tides of her loving soul, and willingly enters 
 the bower of conjugal felicity. He who knows not 
 her nature knows not how to gratify and satisfy that 
 nature. So woman should know the nature of man. 
 The rough world often makes him appear what he is 
 not. He has a vein of tenderness below the stern- 
 ness of his worldly manners which woman should 
 know how to penetrate and bring for her own, as 
 well as for his, proper enjoyment. It is in this strata 
 of tenderness that she finds her true companionship 
 with him, and he with her. If she is ignorant of his 
 nature she knows not how to supply his wants or 
 answer the calls of that nature. Thus we see most 
 clearly the necessity of a thorough study of this 
 whole subject by every youth. It is ignorance in 
 these matters that causes a great amount of matri- 
 monial infelicity. 
 
 Some are disappointed in marriage because they 
 expect too much from it; but many more because 
 they do not bring into the copartnership their fair 
 share of cheerfulness, kindness, forbearance, and 
 
3IARRIA I 415 
 
 rommoo sense. Their imagination has pictured a 
 condition of things never experienced on this side 
 heaven, and when real life comes with its troubles 
 and cares there is a sudden wakening up as irorn a 
 dream. Or, they look for something approaching 
 perfection in their chosen companion, and discover 
 by experience that the fairest of characters have 
 their weaknesses. Yet it is often the very imperfec- 
 tion of human nature, rather than its perfections, that 
 makes the strongest claims on the forbearance and 
 sympathy of others and, in affectionate and sensible 
 natures, tends to produce the closest unions. 
 
 Marriage is the source from whence originates. 
 as from a radiant point, the most beautiful glories : 
 life, and also the deepest cares. Talk as we will if 
 marriage, it is a real affair — it abounds in homely 
 details. The joys of the wedding morn are quick/ 
 followed by the anxious cares of daily life. But 
 if entered understandingly, and lived as becomes 
 thoughtful, considerate human beings, each of whom 
 tries to bear with the other's infirmities, and to c:r- 
 s:ier :re ::rer's rarciress as cararr.ru::: *.v:::: rheir 
 own, it then becomes a delightful scene of domes:.: 
 happiness, to which all true men and women look 
 forward as the condition of life most corse car: :: 
 their :rue happiness. 
 
416 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 c£o 
 
 ?I]^M} Mglj. 
 
 ISfN the minds of nearly all properly constituted in- 
 ^ dividuals there exists the hope and expectation 
 ■ of marriage. This is in accordance with the law 
 of God as written in our physical being, and the 
 young man who marries not, save in a few excep- 
 tional cases, arising out of ill health, deformity, or 
 eccentricity of character, fails in one of the most 
 palpable duties of life. He deprives himself of life's 
 most refined and exalted pleasures, of some of its 
 strongest incentives to virtue and activity, sets an 
 example unworthy of imitation, and fails to do much 
 good that he might do in society. Moreover, he 
 leaves one who might have made him a happy and 
 useful companion to pine in maidenhood of heart 
 through all the weary days of life. 
 
 A single life is not without its advantages, while 
 a married one that fails of accomplishing its true end 
 is the acme of earthly wretchedness. It is eminently 
 proper to prepare for marriage, since this is designed 
 by the Almighty Author to promote the health, hap- 
 piness, purity, and real greatness of our species. 
 But it is an error to fancy that you can not be truly 
 happy in a single state, or hastily to assume the re- 
 sponsibilities of married life without due considera- 
 tion. There is many a wife who, having married 
 hastily and with a lack of due caution, has buried 
 her hopes even of happiness deep in a grave of de- 
 spair. And many a man who married without due 
 
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 throb with pain. If it does not Kail to jour lot to 
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 scenes wherein great artifice and deception, mriair- 
 ness and insincerity are too often practiced, and often 
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 that it is, indeed, that state of life most becoming the 
 dignity and happiness of man. yet it is not true that 
 single life does not present fields oi usefulness and 
 honor, and that, above all things, it is true wisdom to 
 remain single to the end of vour days, unless you are 
 satisfied that it is advisable to unite your destiny with 
 that of another. 
 
 Marriage has a great refining and moralizing 
 tendency. When a man marries early and uses 
 prudence in choosing a suitable companion, he is 
 likely to lead a virtuous, happy life ; but in an un- 
 married state all alluring vices have a tendency to 
 draw him away. Marriage renders a man more vir- 
 tuous and more wise. An unmarried man is but 
 half 01 a perfect being, and it requires the other 
 half to make thing's right ; and it can not be ex- 
 pected that in this imperfect state he can keep 
 straight in the path of rectitude any more than that 
 a boat with one oar can keep a straight course. 
 Marriage changes the current of a man's feelings, 
 and gives him a center for his thoughts, his affec- 
 tions, and his acts. 
 
 There are exceptions to every rule ; but the 
 chances are that the young man who marries will 
 make a stronger and better fight all through life than 
 he who remains single. The reason of this is not 
 difficult to find. A man will not put forth all his 
 energies who has not something outside of self to 
 draw him on and to incite him to put forth his best 
 exertions. He also feels the lack of a home, which 
 tends to round out life. He may, indeed, .have a 
 
SINGLE LIFE. 419 
 
 place to eat, a place to sleep, and, for that matter, all 
 the luxury that money can buy; but we have long 
 since learned that money will not buy every thing. 
 It is utterly beyond its power to purchase a home and 
 the treasures of love. This the unmarried man can 
 not obtain. He may be courted for his money ; he 
 may eat, drink, and revel ; and he may sicken and die 
 in a hotel or a garret, with plenty of attendants 
 about him. But, alas! what are attendants, waiting 
 like so many cormorants for their prey, as compared 
 with those whose hearts are knit to him by the strong 
 ties of family relationship. 
 
 If marriage increases the cares it also heightens 
 the pleasures of life. If it, in some instances, damp- 
 ens the enthusiasm and seems a hindrance to success 
 in countless instances it has proved to be the in- 
 centive which has called forth the best part of man's 
 nature, roused him from selfish apathy, and inspired 
 in him those generous principles and high resolves 
 which have caused all his after life to be replete with 
 kindly acts, and himself to develop into a character 
 known, loved, and honored by all within the sphere 
 of its influence. 
 
 Jeremy Taylor, in contrasting single life with 
 married life, says, in his quaint style: " Marriage is 
 a school and exercise of virtue, and though marriage 
 hath cares, yet single life hath desires which are more 
 troublesome and more dangerous, and often end in 
 sin ; while the cares are but exercises of piety, and. 
 therefore, if single life hath more privacy of devotion, 
 yet marriage hath more variety of it, and is an exer- 
 
420 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 rise of more grace. Marriage is the proper scene 
 of piety and patience, of the duty of parents, and the 
 charity of relations ; here kindness is spread abroad, 
 and love is united and made firm as a center. 
 
 "Marriage is the nursery of heaven. The virgin 
 sends prayers to God, but she carries but one soul 
 to him ; but the state of marriage fills up the number 
 of the elect, and hath in it the labor of love and the 
 delicacies of friendship, the blessings of society, and 
 the union of hearts and hands. It hath in it more 
 safety than single life hath ; it hath more care ; it is 
 more merry and more sad ; it is fuller of joys and 
 sorrows ; it lies under more burdens, but it is sup- 
 ported by all the strength of love and charity, which 
 makes those burdens delightful. Marriage is the 
 mother of the world, and preserves kingdoms, and 
 fills cities and churches and heaven itself, and is that 
 state of good things to which God hath designed the 
 present constitution of the world." 
 
 Though a great deal can be urged against mar- 
 riage at too early an age, or against hasty and inju- 
 dicious marriages, still there arrives a time in the life 
 of every individual when it would be a great deal 
 wiser for him to marry than to remain single. And 
 we suppose that the number of bachelors who re- 
 main single all their life is exceedingly small ; com- 
 paratively few of them die unmarried. When least 
 expected they contract matrimonial alliances, thereby 
 ofttimes disappointing numerous proteges, who "have 
 been confidently expecting that they would come in 
 for the property. And the chances are against such 
 
SINGLE LIFE. 421 
 
 marriages being happy, for it is more one of conven- 
 ience, both on his part and that of his wife. She 
 probably takes him because he is wealthy and can 
 provide her with a first-rate establishment. He prob- 
 ably marries her because he is insufferably lonely 
 and wishes to have a home of his own, where, if he 
 can not do every thing as he likes, he is certain of 
 a real welcome. 
 
 Though many of the most pathetic sorrows of life 
 are caused by the endearing relations existing, by 
 marriage, between the suffering one and another, yet 
 deep in the heart of many who walk through life 
 alone, unattended by the sympathy of a loving com- 
 panion, 
 
 "Lies 
 Deeply buried from human eyes" 
 
 some of the deepest and most soul-pervading griefs 
 that humanity knows of. Perhaps that old man, now 
 so cross and fretful, whom we call "old bachelor," 
 even now has a mistiness come in his eye and a 
 pathetic tremor in his tongue as he looks at a faded 
 picture, to him too sacred for the curious gaze of 
 others — a picture whose limning has faded as the real 
 one faded long ago under the coffin lid. And there 
 are, no doubt, many whom we call selfish, proud, 
 cold-hearted men who once were as warm-hearted 
 and generous as any could wish, who once poured 
 out all the wealth of their affections on one unworthy 
 of them, the discovery of which changed their whole 
 nature. 
 
 There are women whom the world calls single, 
 
422 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 who are as truly wedded to a tear-stained package 
 as if it really were the being it represents to them — 
 who live in the old, sweet time those missives once 
 belonged to, and who keep their hearts apart from 
 the dull reality that makes up the present world. 
 Years may have passed, and nothing remains the 
 same except the dear dream that never knew reality, 
 yet, held in their love-life by their fragile paper 
 bonds, they still dwell in that fair, unsubstantial 
 Spring-time, while Autumn fades and Winter, cold 
 and dreary, reigns in all the outer world. 
 
 |CTJ|HE marriage institution is the bond of social 
 i|B|l order, and if treated with due respect, care, 
 y and consideration greatly enhances individual 
 happiness and consequently general good. The 
 Spartan law punished those who did not marry, those 
 who married too late, and those who married im- 
 properly. Though positive law has long since ceased 
 to exercise any discretion as to whether a person 
 marries or remains single, yet, as the foundation of 
 marriage is fixed in the law of God, written in our 
 physical being, it follows that it is none the less true 
 now than in the morning of time that it is "not good 
 for man to be alone." For ages history has shown 
 that the permanent union of one man with one woman 
 establishes a relation of affection and interest which 
 
MARRIED LIFE. 423 
 
 can in no other way be made to exist between two 
 human beings. Hence marriage, both from a theo- 
 retical and a practical point of view, becomes to him 
 an aid in the stern conflicts of life. 
 
 Many a man has risen from obscurity to fame 
 who in the days of his triumphant victory has freely 
 and gracefully acknowledged that to the sympathy 
 and encouragement of his wife during the long and 
 weary years of toil he owed very much of his achieved 
 success. The good wife! How much of this world's 
 happiness and prosperity is contained in the compass 
 of these two short words ! Her influence is im- 
 mense. The power of a wife for good or for evil is 
 altogether irresistible. Home must be the seat of 
 happiness or it must be forever unknown. A good 
 wife is to a man wisdom and courage, strength and 
 endurance ; a bad one is confusion and weakness, 
 discomfiture and despair. No condition in life is 
 hopeless when the wife possesses firmness, decision, 
 energy, and economy. There is no outward pros- 
 perity which can counteract indolence, folly, and ex- 
 travagance at home. No spirit can long resist bad 
 domestic influences. 
 
 Man is strong, but his strength is not adamant. 
 He delights in enterprise and action; but to sustain 
 him he needs a tranquil mind and a whole heart. 
 He expends his moral force in the conflicts of the 
 world. In the true wife the husband finds not affec- 
 tion only, but companionship — a companionship with 
 which no other can compare. The family relation- 
 ship gives retirement with solitude, and society with- 
 
424 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 out the rough intrusion of the world. It plants in 
 the husband's dwelling a friend who can bear his 
 silence without weariness ; who can listen to the de- 
 tails that affect his interests or sympathy; who can 
 appreciate his repetition of events, only important as 
 they are embalmed in the heart. 
 
 Common friends are linked to us by a slender 
 thread. We must reclaim them by ministering to 
 their interests or their enjoyments. What a luxury 
 it is for a man to feel that in his home there is a 
 true and devoted being, in whose presence he may 
 throw off restraint without danger to his dignity, he 
 may confide without fear of treachery, and be poor or 
 unfortunate without fear of being abandoned. If in 
 the outer world he grows weary of human selfishness, 
 his heart can safely trust in one whose indulgence 
 overlooks his defects. 
 
 The treasure of a wife's affection, like the grace 
 of God, is given, not bought. Gold is power. It 
 can sweep down forests, raise cities, build roads, and 
 deck houses ; but wealth can not purchase love and 
 the affections of a wife. If any husband has failed to 
 estimate the affections of a true wife, he will be likely 
 to mark their value in his loss, when the heart that 
 loved him is stilled by death. Is man the child of 
 sorrow, and do afflictions and distresses pour their 
 bitternesses into his cup? How are his trials alle- 
 viated, his sighs suppressed, his corroding thoughts 
 dissipated, his anxieties and fears relieved, his gloom 
 and depression chased away by her cheerfulness and 
 love! Is he overwhelmed by disappointments and 
 
MARRIED LIFE. 425 
 
 mortified by reproaches ? There is one who can hide 
 his faults from her eyes, and can love without up- 
 braiding. 
 
 A judicious wife is constantly exerting an influ- 
 ence for good over her husband. She is, so to 
 speak, the wielder of the moral pruning knife, and is 
 constantly snipping off from her husband's moral na- 
 ture little twigs that are growing in the wrong 
 direction. Intellectual beings of different sexes were 
 surely intended by their Creator to go through the 
 world thus together, united not only in hand and 
 heart, but in principles, in intellect, in views, and in 
 dispositions, each pursuing one common and noble 
 end — their own improvement and the happiness of 
 those around them by the different means appropri- 
 ate to their situation, mutually correcting, sustaining, 
 and strengthening each other, undegraded by all prac- 
 tices of tyranny on the one hand and deceit on the 
 other, each finding a candid but severe judge in the 
 understanding, and a warm and partial advocate in 
 the heart, of their companion. 
 
 A great deal has been said in a cynical way 
 about the immense number of unhappy marriages. 
 There is so much said on this subject that it is easy 
 to forget that for every instance of complaint there 
 are thousands of beneficent and prosperous unions 
 of which the world never hears. It is natural that 
 the evil attracts the most attention. Men and 
 women whose married life is full of good and help- 
 fulness do not often feel an impulse to defend the 
 system under which they live. Sometimes we hear 
 
426 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 both sexes repine at their change, relate the happi- 
 ness of their earlier years, blame the folly and rash- 
 ness of their own choice, and warn others against 
 the infatuation. But it is to be remembered that the 
 days which they so much wish to call back are the 
 days not only of celibacy, but of youth — the days of 
 novelty and of improvement, of ardor and of hope, 
 of health and vigor of body, of gayety and lightness 
 of heart. It is not easy to surround life with any 
 circumstances in which youth will not be delightful ; 
 and we are afraid that, whether married or single, 
 we shall find the vesture of terrestrial existence more 
 heavy and cumbersome the longer it is worn. 
 
 It is human to see only the good side of any thing 
 that is past and gone. Life is so full of disappoint- 
 ments that whenever in mature years we recall past 
 days, our present state, being present reality, always 
 suffers by comparison with the past. It would be 
 well to calmly reflect on what happiness in married 
 life depends. There is a great deal of mischief 
 wrought in the world by the common understanding 
 of the phrase " mismated." Many apparently act as 
 if all the ills of married life could be explained by a 
 convenient use of that word. 
 
 It is arrogant folly to suppose that so much mis- 
 ery and wrong, so much selfishness and cruelty, so 
 much that is low, animal, and unlovely in the lives 
 of men and women, results from their being " mis- 
 mated." They have, in the majority of cases, mis- 
 taken the cause of their trouble. These men and wo- 
 men are undeveloped, exacting, selfish, proud. They 
 
MARRIED LIFE. 427 
 
 have undisciplined tempers, and they are accustomed 
 to think of happiness for themselves as the chief end 
 of marriage. No magic of "mating" would make 
 the lives of such people very high or perfect. 
 
 Nowhere does it prove so powerfully true as in 
 married life, that your happiness is found in consult- 
 ing the happiness of another. We are too prone to 
 trust to specific treatment for particular evils. The 
 real problem of happiness in married life is not diffi- 
 cult of solution if only sought with a spirit of will- 
 ingness to learn the truths. There are no short roads 
 to happiness. The men and women who marry must 
 somehow acquire thoughtfulness, self-control, consid- 
 eration for others, patience, and the other qualities, 
 without which life is unendurable in any relations we 
 know of. All candid persons will so readily admit 
 this, that marriage speedily becomes a school for the 
 exercise of virtue, and is the source and nurse of 
 many of the best qualities in the life of man or 
 woman. 
 
 It is indeed wonderful that marriage does so 
 much for them, and has such power to lift up their 
 lives to light and beauty. The man who remains 
 single to the end of his days can not well help grow- 
 ing cynical, cold, and selfish. By nature he may be 
 as warm-hearted, as full of generous impulses, as any, 
 but he has only himself to care for. He has never 
 felt the necessity of striving to make happy the life 
 of another. He has never known what it is to have 
 a woman's heart, full of womanly tenderness and 
 strength, affection, sympathy, and encouragement, 
 
428 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 looking to him for love and happiness, for protection 
 and comfort ; has never learned the lesson of patience 
 as it is learned in bearing with the faults of a loved 
 ';. He has never known what it is to have a little 
 child turn to him as the source of consolation for its 
 childish troubles and ,. It can not but follow 
 
 that, lacking all the bitter-sweet experience of mar- 
 ried life, he shall in that degree fail of being a com- 
 plete man. 
 
 True, there are natures that, whether married or 
 single, ■ \ only develop into the cold, hard-hearted 
 disposition ; but that does not at all detract from the 
 fact that marriage does thus tend to make life more 
 replete with kindness and manly attributes than 
 celibacy. Every man feels the need of a home, and 
 there is no more sorrowful sight than to see a man 
 bent with the weight of years, who is homeless and 
 has no friends united to him by family ties. There 
 can not be a home without the institution of mar- 
 riage. Think for a moment how much of the joy 
 and sorrow of life is connected with the word home. 
 What visions of hopes, what days of joy, what sea- 
 sons of sorrow,, does it not recall? All the lights and 
 shades of life originate from thence. How, then, can 
 a man or woman lacking the experience of home and 
 married life possess the strength of character, the 
 full and complete development, expected from those 
 who have taken upon themselves the joys and sor- 
 rows, the cross and crown of matrimony ? 
 
DUTIES OF MA IlllI Kl) L/I'K 4 2!) 
 
 IfSpAIMMNI^SS in life, is of such momentous im 
 portance that it becomes all to study well the 
 conditions of happiness, and to none does this 
 truth apply itself with greater (ore: than to 
 those who have taken upon themselves the duties of 
 matrimony. It is vain and useless now to ponder 
 the wisdom and propriety of the choice. The step 
 has been taken, and it only remains now to take up 
 the duties thus voluntarily assumed, and, in the due 
 performance of the same, do what is in their power 
 to gather the happiness with which God, in his good 
 ness, has invested the marriage relation. 
 
 Husbands and wives should learn to live happily 
 together, for the lesson can be learned. By living 
 happily together we do not understand a calm, pas 
 sive existence, unbroken by a single dissenting word 
 or look, because persons are incapacitated for happi 
 ness who can adapt themselves to such an impotent 
 existence. Occasional differences of opinion indicate 
 mutual vitality, and, when backed by common sense 
 and self-control, are no drawbacks to a peaceful life. 
 But in all vital points of mutual interest husband 
 and wife, should agree perfectly, understanding that 
 their interests are mutual, and that in <:vcry sense ol 
 the word they are. one. 
 
 Life is real, and our every day wants and desires 
 remain the same after as before marriage. All \\\f 
 infirmities of our nature must still be fought against. 
 
430 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 The marriage ceremony does not do away with the 
 necessity of self-control ; the passions still have to 
 be subdued, and a careful watch maintained against 
 hasty words and actions. Many, in failing to recog- 
 nize these truths, are laying the foundation for future 
 unhappiness. It is so easy to imagine that the loved 
 one is all perfection, and when the soul is filled with 
 the sweet influence of love it is so easy to think that 
 this is sufficient for all the ills of life, that now these 
 two " harps of a thousand strings" will henceforth 
 always be attuned to each other, and thus, ignoring 
 the fact that human nature is extremely frail, forget 
 to strengthen it by the exercise of reflection and judg- 
 ment, fail to summon to their aid consideration and a 
 disposition to bear and forbear, suddenly awaken to 
 the fact that life has ever its trials, and that — 
 
 "For the busiest day some duty waits." 
 
 They then learn that happiness comes only as the 
 result of persistent following in the paths of duty, 
 that no ceremony or rite can. change their nature, 
 that the plain rules of courtesy and kindness, consid- 
 eration and respect, are as necessary now as in the 
 Spring-time of love. 
 
 Love on both sides and all things equal in out- 
 ward circumstances are not all the requisites of do- 
 mestic felicity. Young people seldom court in their 
 every-day dress, but they must put it on after mar- 
 riage. As in other bargains but few expose defects. 
 They are apt to marry faultless. Love is blind, but 
 faults are there and will come out. The fastidious 
 
DUTIES OF MARRIED LIFE. -_ \ 1 
 
 attentions of wooing are like Spring flowers — they 
 make pretty nosegays, but poor greens. The beau- 
 tiful romance with which so many have invested the 
 morning-time of wedded life is apt to wear off under 
 the burden and heat of its noon. That this should not 
 be so all will admit ; that wedded love, like the river 
 running to the ocean, should grow in magnitude as 
 it rolls through life should, no doubt, be the result 
 of all well-lived matrimonial lives. But, from the 
 constitution and nature of man, such, unfortunately 
 is not always the case. The honeymoon, at times, 
 gets an unexpected dash of vinegar, and at last it 
 disappears altogether in the prosaic duties of home 
 life. This is the trying hour of married life. Be- 
 tween the parties there can be no more illusions. 
 The deceptions of courtship are no longer of avail. 
 Right here is the chance to make or mar the 
 happiness of life. Why not look the matter plainly 
 in the face? Why not recognize the fact that lift Is 
 not romance ? It is a real thincr and altogether too 
 precious to be thrown away in secret regrets or : •: e n 
 indifference. It is your duty now to begin the duty 
 of adaptation. If you have neglected to study the 
 conditions of happiness heretofore begin a: Mice :: 
 do so. If you have been derelict in duty resolve to 
 do your share now. If you find you do not Love 
 each other as you thought you did double your at- 
 tentions to each other, and be zealous of any thin? 
 which tends in the slightest way to separate you. 
 Acknowledge your faults to one another, and de- 
 termine that henceforth you will be all in all to 
 
432 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 each other. There is no other way for you to do. 
 It is not too late for you to look for happiness. You 
 are yet young. It is folly to expect naught but dis- 
 appointment the rest of your life. 
 
 The fault is in human nature, and, like most 
 faults, has a remedy. It is well to study for the 
 remedy, for the man or woman who has settled down 
 on the conviction that he or she is attached for life 
 to an uncongenial mate, and that there is no way of 
 escape, has lost life ; there is no effort too costly to 
 make which can restore the missing pearl to its 
 setting upon the bosom. No doubt much of the un- 
 happiness of married life would be saved if only the 
 sober views of life and duty were more carefully con- 
 sidered before marriage. If only every couple would 
 consider that over against every joy stands a duty, 
 and that tears and smiles alternate with each other 
 through life, they would save themselves much disap- 
 pointments. It is not too late, however, to begin ; 
 and so, if this truth be not recognized before mar- 
 riage, do not delay an instant when once stern facts 
 have withdrawn the pleasing illusions with which an 
 untaught fancy invested matrimony, and life, with its 
 duties as well as its pleasures, appears to your view. 
 
 It has always seemed to us that much of the dan- 
 ger of home life springs from its familiarity ; that in 
 the intimate relations of husband and wife the parties 
 are too apt to forget the claims of courtesy which are 
 constantly pressing upon them. While there should 
 be no strictness of formal etiquette between the par- 
 ties, it is none the less true that, since life is made up 
 
DUTIES OF MARRIED LIFE. 433 
 
 of forms and ceremonies, and much of the pleasures 
 of life depend on the due observance of the same, 
 that a spirit of courtesy should constantly exist be- 
 tween husband and wife. Before marriage e 
 would be cautious of a breach of manners, and would 
 strive to demean themselves as became ladies and 
 gentlemen. Are not the claims of courtesy just as 
 pressing now as ever ? Has the marriage cerem 
 given you any right to be less than polite? And, in 
 a still higher sense, when you reflect that true court- 
 esy is ever accompanied by the spirit of kindness and 
 a dignity of carriage the more pressing are its claims. 
 It is difficult to conceive of anv station in life 
 where the exercise of patience is not imperatively de- 
 manded. All life is effectually teaching and empha- 
 sizing this lesson of patience. But marriage aflc 
 a field where too great an importance can not be 
 attached to it. Its claims are fresh every morning 
 and new every evening, and it were difficult to c 
 ceive of any thing which had more to do with home 
 happiness than bearing patiently the innumerable 
 vexations which are constantlv thrown in vour path. 
 Every coupled pair flatter themselves that their ex- 
 perience will be better and more excellent than that 
 of many who have gone before them. They look 
 with amazement at the coldness, complaining-:, i 
 dissatisfaction which spoil the comfort of so many 
 homes as at things which can not by any possibility 
 fall to their happier lot. But like causes produce 
 like effects, and to avoid the misfortune of others 
 we must avoid their mistakes. 
 
 23 
 
434 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 The acquaintance of courtship is a very one-sided 
 affair, both parties seeing through the peculiar atmos- 
 phere which magnifies virtue, changes defects into 
 beauties, and makes the discovery of faults impos- 
 sible. The discovery will certainly come, and those 
 who had thought each other next to perfection will 
 soon discover that some few imperfections and the 
 common weaknesses of humanity remain. Disap- 
 pointment is felt where there is no just reason for it. 
 They had thought they were perfectly adapted to each 
 other, and that mutual concessions would involve no 
 self-denial, and that whatever either desired the other 
 would instantly yield. But experience teaches that 
 the work of mutual adaptation is precisely what they 
 have to learn, to understand each other's peculiarities 
 and tastes, weaknesses and excellencies, and by self- 
 discipline and kindness of construction on both sides 
 to receive and impart a modifying influence, bringing 
 them nearer each other all the time, until through 
 this interchangeable moral and spiritual culture the 
 hopes of happiness are fully realized. 
 
 But this happy result, which is unquestionably 
 the highest earth affords, depends in a great degree 
 upon the manner in which the first few years of mar- 
 ried life are spent, and the success with which its first 
 unavoidable trials are met and overcome. Some 
 allow themselves to lose sight of the great truth that 
 happiness is surest found in consulting the happiness 
 of others. The husband should have as his great 
 object and rule of conduct the happiness of his wife. 
 Of that happiness the confidence in his affection is 
 
DUTIES OF MARRIED LIFE. 435 
 
 the chief element ; and the proofs of this affection on 
 his part, therefore, constitute his chief duty. An 
 affection that shows itself not in caresses alone, as if 
 these were the only demonstration of love, but of 
 that respect which distinguishes love as a principle, 
 from that brief passion which assumes, and only as- 
 sumes, the name — a respect which consults the judg- 
 ment as well as the wishes of the object beloved, 
 which considers her who is worthy of being taken to 
 the heart as worthy of being admitted to all the 
 counsels of the head. 
 
 Do not forget that your happiness both here and 
 hereafter depends upon each other's influence. An 
 unkind word or look, or an unintentional neglect 
 sometimes lead to thoughts which ripen into the ruin 
 of body and soul. A spirit of forbearance, patience, 
 and kindness, and a determination to keep the chain 
 of love bright, are likely to develop corresponding 
 qualities, and to make the rough places of life smooth 
 and pleasant. Have you seriously reflected that it is 
 in the power of either of you to make the other ut- 
 terly miserable ? And when the storms and trials 
 of life come, for come they will, how much either of 
 you can do to calm, to elevate, to purify the troubled 
 spirit of the other, and change clouds for sunshine ! 
 
 It is emphatically the duty of all who have entered 
 into marriage to strive to forget self, and in further- 
 ing the happiness of the other to advance their own ; 
 ever remembering that, even though attended with the 
 fairest of outward prospects, infirmity is inseparably 
 bound up with your very nature, and that in bearing 
 
436 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 one another's burdens you are fulfilling one of the 
 highest duties of the union. Love in marriage can not 
 subsist unless it be mutual ; and where love can not 
 be there can be left of wedlock nothing but the empty 
 husk of an outside matrimony, as undelightful and as 
 unpleasing to God as any other kind of hypocrisy. 
 
 gE celebrate the wedding and make merry over 
 the honeymoon. The poet paints the beauties 
 and blushes of the blooming bride ; and the 
 bark of matrimony, with its freight of untested 
 love, is launched on the sea of experiment, amid kind 
 wishes and rejoicing. But on that precarious sea 
 are many storms, and even the calm has its perils ; 
 and only when the bark has weathered these, and 
 landed its cargo in the haven of domestic peace, can 
 we pronounce the voyage prosperous and congratu- 
 late on their merited and enviable reward. 
 
 As long as human nature is what it is, we must 
 expect that life of any kind will abound in trials. 
 To conceive of a life utterly devoid of these is to 
 conceive of a vegetative kind of existence. Trials, 
 then, are to be expected, and they must be overcome. 
 This is none the less true of married life. Marriages 
 may be celebrated in bowers as fair as those of 
 Eden, but they must be proved and put to test in the 
 workshops of the world. And as each state of exist- 
 
TRIALS OF MARRIED LIFE . 437 
 
 ence has its peculiar trials and cares, we need not be 
 disappointed when experience teaches that, though 
 marriage hath indeed great joys, it has also its trials 
 and vexations. 
 
 In prosaic, every-day life romantic minds are 
 speedily sobered down, and the gloss of pretension 
 is soon worn off. Hands that have heretofore seen 
 no harder work than to entice strains of music from 
 ivory keys, perhaps find themselves engaged in the 
 less poetical, but equally as praiseworthy, occupation 
 of mixing bread, or in the performance of other plain 
 household duties which require to be dispatched, not 
 by angels, but by women. And the possessor of 
 faultless clothes and a silken mustache finds himself 
 weighed down with altogether different burdens than 
 those of holding fans and carrvina- parasols ; and he 
 
 O J O J. 
 
 is called upon to solve other questions than those 
 relating to social etiquette. 
 
 Courtship is to many a dreamy resting-place be- 
 twixt the joys of youth and the cares of maturity. 
 Under the light of hope married life is nearly always 
 a land of rainbows to the youth ; but. as to produce 
 the rainbow it requires the falling rain as well as the 
 shining sun. so. when the nature of these prospective 
 joys is carefully investigated, it will not surprise one 
 to find that trials and duties are interposed between 
 their present stand-point and the pure happiness of 
 domestic life. 
 
 To many a young couple, when life's realities 
 come, come also the discovery of traits of character 
 in each other which perfectly astonish them. Every 
 
438 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 day reveals something new and something unpleasant. 
 The courtship character slowly fades away, and, with 
 sorrow be it said, too often the courtship love as well. 
 Now comes disappointment, sorrow, regret. They 
 find that their characters are entirely dissimilar ; they 
 also awake to the fact that married life is full of cares, 
 vexations, and disappointments. This, indeed, should 
 have been expected ; but it is human to see naught 
 but joys in the future, especially from the stand-point 
 of youth. This discovery often shipwrecks the hap- 
 piness of the unfortunate couple. 
 
 We have all seen the trees die in Summer-time. 
 But the tree, with its whispering leaves and swaying 
 limbs, its greenness, its umbrage, where the shadows 
 lie hidden all the day, does not die all at once. First 
 a dimness creeps over its brightness ; next a leaf 
 sickens here and there, and fades ; next a whole 
 bough feels the palsying touch of coming death ; and 
 finally the feeble signs of sickly life, visible here and 
 there, all disappear, and the dead trunk holds out its 
 stripped, stark limbs, a melancholy ruin. Just so 
 does wedded love sometimes die. Wedded love, 
 blessed with the prayers of friends, hallowed by the 
 sanction of God, rosy with present joys, and radiant 
 with future hopes, it dies not all at once. A hasty 
 word casts a shadow upon it, and the shadow deepens 
 with the sharp reply. A little thoughtlessness mis- 
 construed, a little unintentional negligence, deemed 
 real, a little word misinterpreted, — through such 
 small channels do dissension and sorrow enter the 
 family circle. Love becomes reticent, confidence is 
 
TRIALS OF MARRIED LIFE. 439 
 
 chilled, and noiselessly but surely the work of sepa- 
 ration goes on, until the two are left as isolated as 
 the pyramids, nothing remaining of the union but 
 the legal form — the dead trunk of the tree, whose 
 branches once waved in the sunlight. Is it not a 
 melancholy reflection on human nature that petty 
 trials and difficulties, from which no life is free, 
 should have wrought such a startling effect? 
 
 The great secret is to learn to bear with each oth- 
 er's failings ; not to be blind to them — that were either 
 an impossibility or a folly. We must see and feel 
 them ; if we do neither, they are not evils to us, and 
 there is obviously no need of forbearance. We are 
 to throw the mantle of charity around them, conceal- 
 ing them from the curious gaze of others ; to deter- 
 mine not to let them chill the affections. Surely 
 it is not the perfections, but the imperfections, of 
 human character that make the strongest claims on 
 our love. 
 
 All the world must approve and even enemies must 
 admire the good and the estimable in human nature. 
 If husband and wife estimate only that in each which 
 all must be constrained to value, what do they more 
 than others ? It is the infirmities of character, im- 
 perfections of nature, that call for pitying sympathy, 
 the tender compassion that makes each the comforter, 
 the monitor of the other. Forbearance helps each 
 to attain command over themselves. This forbear- 
 ance is not a weak and wicked indulgence of each 
 other's faults, but such a calm, tender observation of 
 them as excludes all harshness and anger, and takes 
 
440 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 the best and fullest method of pointing them out in 
 the full confidence of affection. 
 
 It should be remembered that trials and sufferings 
 are the real test of merit in all life, as they bring out 
 the real character. In married life husband and wife 
 are often adapted to each other through trials, and 
 the closest union is often wrought by suffering, even 
 as iron is welded by heat. As much of the happi- 
 ness of real life is artificial, so many things in wedded 
 life that to third persons must seem as trials are, 
 after all, only the sweetness of domestic life. How 
 many couples, now in mature life and surrounded by 
 luxury and all the comforts of wealth, look back to 
 the days of early privation as amongst the happiest 
 days of their life ! Succeeding years have brought 
 them wealth, but it took with them their domestic 
 happiness. 
 
 Marriage is too frequently the end instead of the 
 beginning of love. The dreams of courtship vanish 
 too often into thin air soon after the wedding ring is 
 put on. The realization of that perfect and unalloyed 
 happiness that each partner anticipated is seldom 
 found in the holy bonds of matrimony. Cool and 
 distant, with a feeling that the sweet courtesies of 
 wooing-time are now out of place, they treat each 
 other with an indifference that ends in mutual aver- 
 sion and contempt. This is altogether wrong. As 
 reasoning men and women they have entered the 
 relation ; it is vain to suppose it is one of unmixed 
 delights. It has its trials. You must expect to 
 meet them. The conditions of happiness there are 
 
TRIALS OF MARRIED LIFE. 441 
 
 much the same as elsewhere, therefore the only sure 
 way of finding it is to forget self in the furtherance 
 of the happiness of others. The trials of wedded life 
 are seen to be but the approaches to its joys when 
 once the spirit of kindly forbearance is spread abroad 
 in the heart. 
 
 It must seem to all who seriously meditate on 
 this subject that many of the trials of married life 
 arise from mistaken notions of economy and the right 
 use of money. Every wife knows her husband's in- 
 come or ought to know it. That knowledge should 
 be the guide of her conduct. A clear understanding 
 respecting the domestic expenses is necessary to 
 the peace of every dwelling. If it be little, " better 
 is a dinner of herbs where love is, than a stalled ox 
 and hatred therewith." If it be ample, let it be en- 
 joyed with all thankfulness. Partners in privation 
 are more to each other than partners in wealth. 
 Those who have suffered together love more than 
 those who have rejoiced together. Where a wife, 
 seeing her duty, has made up her mind to this, she 
 will brighten her little home with smiles that will 
 make it a region of perpetual sunshine. 
 
 We account these two things essential to the hap- 
 piness of married life, — to have a home of your own, 
 and to live distinctly and honestly within your means. 
 A great proportion of the failures in wedlock may be 
 traced directly to the neglect of the latter rule. No 
 • man can feel happy or enjoy the sweets of domestic 
 life who is spending more than he earns. No sensi- 
 ble person will account it a hardship to begin on a 
 
442 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 moderate scale ; and those who do thus begin, and 
 afterwards attain to the possession of wealth, always 
 look back to the days of "small things" with pe- 
 culiar satisfaction as the golden days of their hearts, 
 if not of their purses. True affection delights in the 
 opportunities of self-denial and in the little acts of 
 personal service, for which there is scarcely any 
 place in the house of the rich. 
 
 At the shrine of domestic ambition much of the 
 comfort and happiness of home life is immolated, and, 
 for the sake of appearance, happiness and content 
 are exchanged for wearying cares. To regulate our 
 expenses by other people's income is the height of 
 folly, and to contract debts for a style of living- 
 which is of our neighbor's choosing rather than our 
 own is nearly akin to insanity. There is no happi- 
 ness, social, domestic, or individual, without inde- 
 pendence ; and no dependence is so bitter as that of 
 debt. And when you reflect how needless this is, 
 you can readily see that in this instance, as in many 
 others, the trials are of our own choosing, and might 
 be avoided by consideration and care. 
 
HUSBAND AND WIFE. 443 
 
 "O let us walk the world, so that our love 
 Burns like a blessed beacon, beautiful, 
 Upon the walls of life's surrounding dark." 
 
 — Massey. 
 
 Sp|HE true marriage is the result of years of mu- 
 B g ™^ tual endeavor to please, and comes of patient 
 tj efforts to learn each other's disposition and 
 taste. This can be done by all who cherish 
 right views of the duties and pleasures of the mar- 
 riage relation. 
 
 You have but one life to live, and no amount of 
 money or influence or fame can pay you for a life 
 of unhappiness. You can not afford to quarrel with 
 one another. You can not afford to cherish a single 
 thought, to harbor a single desire, to gratify a single 
 passion, nor indulge a single selfish feeling, that will 
 tend to make this union any thing but a source of 
 happiness to you. So it becomes you at starting to 
 have a perfect understanding with one another. It 
 becomes you to resolve that you will be happy to- 
 gether at any rate, or that if you suffer it shall be 
 from the same cause and in perfect sympathy. You 
 are not to let any human being step between you 
 under any circumstances. 
 
 Human character, by a wise provision of Provi- 
 dence, is infinitely varied, and there are not two in- 
 dividuals in existence so entirely alike in their tastes, 
 habits of thought, and natural aptitude that they can 
 keep step with one another over all the rough places 
 
444 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 in the journey of life. There must be a leaning to 
 one another. The compromise can not be all on one 
 side. You can be happy together if you will, but 
 the agreement to be happy must be mutual. Draw 
 your souls closer and closer together from year to 
 year. Get all obstacles out of the way. Just as 
 soon as one arises attend to it, and get rid of it. 
 At last they will all disappear. You will have be- 
 come wonted to one another's habits and frames of 
 mind and peculiarities of disposition, and love, re- 
 spect, and charity will take care of the rest. 
 
 If you observe faults in your companion keep them 
 to yourself. What right have you, who should be the 
 very one to kindly conceal faults, to inform others of 
 their presence? Neither father nor mother, neither 
 brother nor sister, have any right to be informed of 
 the secrets of your domestic life. A husband and 
 wife have no business to tell one another's faults to 
 any body but themselves. They can not do it with- 
 out shame. Their grievances are to be settled in 
 private between themselves, and in all public places 
 and among friends they are to preserve towards one 
 another that nice consideration and entire respectful- 
 ness which their relations enjoin. With a true wife 
 the husband's faults should be secret. A wife for- 
 gets when she condescends to that refuge of weak- 
 ness, a female confidant. A wife's bosom should be 
 the tomb of her husband's failings, and his character 
 far more valuable in her estimation than life. 
 
 Happiness between husband and wife can only be 
 secured by that constant tenderness and care of the 
 
HUSBAND AND WIFE. 445 
 
 parties for each other which are based upon warm 
 and demonstrative love. The heart demands that 
 the man shall not sit silent, reticent, and self-ab- 
 sorbed in the midst of his family. The wife who 
 forgets to provide for her husband's tastes and wishes 
 renders her home undesirable for him. In a word, 
 ever-present and ever-demonstrative gentleness must 
 reign, or else the heart starves. 
 
 There is propriety in all things, and though pub- 
 lic displays 01 affection, familiarity of touch, and 
 half-concealed caresses are always distasteful to men 
 and women of sense, yet love is of such a nature 
 that you must give it expression or it languishes. 
 There are husbands so cold and formal that they 
 have no kiss or caress for the wives whom they 
 really love. There are wives to whom a single dem- 
 onstration that shall tell to their hearts how inex- 
 pressibly pleasant their faces and their society are, 
 and how fondly they are loved, would be better than 
 untold gold. 
 
 The affection that should link together man and 
 wife is a far holier and more enduring passion than 
 the enthusiasm q{ young love. It may want its gor- 
 geousness or its imaginative character, but it is far 
 richer in its attributes. It should not call for such 
 daily proofs oi existence as is demanded of the lover. 
 but it is human to wish for the freshness of morning 
 to continue far into the day and evening. True, it 
 is vain to expect this, but humanity continually wishes 
 for what can not be ; and, though the elow and 
 sparkle of the morning of love will fade away, yet it 
 
446 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 should be as fades the bewitching charm of morning 
 into the quiet splendor of the Summer day ; and, 
 though recognizing that exhibitions of tenderness so 
 appropriate for the morning of life are out of place 
 in its noon, yet, as long as it is human to love, so 
 long are exhibitions of it, quiet though they may be, 
 gratifying to the one beloved. 
 
 We exhort you who are a husband to love your 
 wife even as you love yourself. Continue through 
 life the same manly tenderness that in youth gained 
 her affections. Reflect that though her bodily charms 
 may not now be so great as then, yet that habit and 
 a thousand acts of kindness have strengthened your 
 mutual friendship. Devote yourself to her, and after 
 the hours of business let the pleasures which you 
 most highly prize be found in her society. The true 
 wife wishes to feel sure that she is precious to her 
 husband — not useful, not valuable, not convenient 
 simply, but that she is dear to him; let her be the 
 recipient of his polite and hearty attentions ; let her 
 notice that her cares and loves are noticed, appre- 
 ciated, and returned, her opinions asked, her approval 
 sought, and her judgment respected ; in short, let her 
 only be loved, honored, and cherished in fulfillment 
 of the marriage vow, and she will be to her husband 
 a well-spring of pleasure. 
 
 We exhort you who are wife to be gentle and con- 
 siderate to your husband. Let the influence which 
 you possess over him arise from the mildness of yonr 
 manner and the discretion of your conduct. Whilst 
 you are careful to adorn your person with new and 
 
HUSBAND AND WIFE. 447 
 
 clean apparel — for no woman can long preserve af- 
 fections if she is negligent on this point — be still 
 more attentive in ornamenting your mind with meek- 
 ness and peace, with cheerfulness and good humor. 
 Lighten the cares and chase away the vexations to 
 which he is inevitably exposed in his commerce with 
 the world by rendering, as far as is in your power, 
 his home pleasant. Keep at home. Let your em- 
 ployment and pleasures be domestic. 
 
 What a man desires in a wife is her companion- 
 ship, sympathy, and love. The way of life has many 
 dreary places in it, and man needs a companion to 
 go with him. A man is sometimes overtaken by 
 misfortune ; he meets with failure and defeat, trials 
 and temptation beset him, and he needs one to stand 
 by and sympathize. All through life, through storms 
 and through sunshine, conflicts and victory, man 
 needs a Avoman's love. Let him think upon his duty 
 in return for this love. You who have taken a wife 
 from a happy home of kindred hearts and kind com- 
 panionship, have you done what you could to make 
 amends for the loss of those friends and companions ? 
 Remember what your wife was when you took her, 
 not from compulsion, but from your own choice — a 
 choice based on what you then considered her supe- 
 riority to all others. She was young — perhaps the 
 idol of her happy home ; she was as gay and blithe 
 as the lark, and the brothers and sisters at her 
 father's cherished her as an object of endearment. 
 Yet she left all to join her destiny with yours — to 
 make your home happy, and to do all that womanly 
 
448 GOLDEN OEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 inge'nuity could do to meet your wishes, and to 
 lighten the burdens which might press upon you. 
 Consult the tastes and disposition of your hus- 
 band, and endeavor to give him high and noble 
 thoughts, lofty aims, and temporal comforts. Let 
 the husband see that you really have a strong desire 
 to make him happy, and to retain the warmest place 
 in his respect, his admiration, and his affection. En- 
 ter into all his plans with interest. Sweeten all his 
 troubles with your sympathy. Make him feel that 
 there is one ear always open to the revelation of his 
 experiences, that there is one heart that never mis- 
 construes him, that there is one refuge for him in all 
 circumstances, and that in all weariness of body and 
 soul there is one warm pillow for his head, beneath 
 which a heart is beating with the same unvarying 
 truth and affection, through all gladness and sadness, 
 as the faithful chronometer suffers no perturbation of 
 its rhythm, whether in storm or shine. 
 
JEALOUSY. 449 
 
 " Trifles light as air, 
 
 Are to the jealous confirmation strong 
 
 As proofs of holy writ." 
 
 — Shakespeare. 
 
 SPHERE is no passion more base, nor one which 
 e^Sff* seeks to hide itself more than jealousy. It is 
 4$ ashamed of it itself when it appears. It carries 
 its stain and disgrace on its forehead. We do 
 not wish to acknowledge it ourselves, it is so igno- 
 minious, but hidden in the character we would be 
 confused and disconcerted if it appeared ; by the 
 which we are convinced of our bad minds and de- 
 based courage. 
 
 It is difficult sometimes to distinguish between 
 jealousy and envy, for they often run into one an- 
 other, and are blended together. The most valid 
 distinction seems to be that jealousy is always per- 
 sonal. The envious man desires some good which 
 another possesses ; the jealous man suspects another 
 of seeking to deprive him of some good that he 
 already possesses. 
 
 Jealousy is, in many respects, preferable to envy, 
 since it aims at the preservation of some good which 
 we think belongs to us ; whereas envy is a frenzy 
 that can not endure, even in idea, the good of others. 
 Jealousy is such a headstrong passion, that therein 
 doth consist its danger. All the other passions con- 
 descend at times to accept the inexorable logic of 
 
 29 
 
450 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 facts. But jealousy looks facts straight in the face, 
 ignores them utterly, and says she knows a great 
 deal better than they can tell her. 
 
 Jealousy violates contracts, dissolves society, 
 breaks wedlock, betrays friends and neighbors, thinks 
 nobody is good, and that every one is either doing 
 or designing them an injury. Its rise is in guilt or 
 ill-nature ; as he that is overrun with the jaundice 
 takes others to be yellow. If jealousy were not a 
 hardened offender, he must have disappeared ere 
 this by the abuse which poets and moralists have 
 alike delighted to heap upon him. Yet he still lives 
 and flourishes, exerts his influence and displays his 
 power, as though he were a favored friend or a wel- 
 come guest. 
 
 Did jealousy always make its appearance in its 
 ordinary form of detraction, it would be, compar- 
 atively speaking, harmless ; but it is surprising how 
 many different masks it can assume, and how it lurks 
 and tries to conceal itself under some less mean and 
 unlovable quality. Sometimes it appears in the 
 character of injustice ; sometimes it takes the form 
 of rudeness and want of courtesy; occasionally a bit- 
 ter or sarcastic way of speaking. At other times it 
 borrows the garb of a virtue, and shows itself under 
 what might be mistaken for humility or sincerity ; 
 lying coiled up like a serpent under some flower, 
 and darting forth its venemous sting where and when 
 you least expect to find it. 
 
 No stronger proof is needed to show how con- 
 temptible a fault jealousy is than that no one is will- 
 
JEALOUSY. 451 
 
 ing to acknowledge that they are jealous. It is jeal- 
 ousy that is the root and foundation of many offenses, 
 but they are charged to other causes. Jealousy is 
 singular in this : every trifling circumstance is re- 
 garded as confirming and strengthening the pre- 
 viously aroused suspicions. It is a sorer curse, a 
 more certain and fatal blight to the heart on which 
 it seizes, than it can be to those against -whom its 
 spite is hurled. Jealousy is as cruel as the grave; 
 not the grave that opens its deep bosom to receive 
 and shelter from further storms the worn and forlorn 
 pilgrim, who rejoices exceedingly and is glad when 
 he can find its repose ; but cruel as the grave is 
 when it yawns and swallows down from the lap of 
 luxury, from the summit of fame, from the bosom of 
 love, the desire of many eyes and hearts. 
 
 Among the deadly things upon the earth, or in 
 the sea, or flying through malarial regions, few are 
 more noxious than jealousy. And of all mad pas- 
 sions there is not one that has a vision more dis- 
 torted or a more unreasonable fury. To the jealous 
 eye white looks black, yellow looks green, and the 
 very sunshine turns deadly lurid. There is no inno- 
 cence, no justice, no generosity that is not touched 
 with suspicions save just the jealous person's own. 
 Once lodged within the heart, for life it rules ascend- 
 ant and alone. It sports in solitude. It pants for 
 blood, and rivers will not sate its thirst. Minds 
 strongest in worth and valor stoop to meanness and 
 disgrace before it. The meanest soul, the weakest, 
 it can give courage to beyond the daring of despair. 
 
452 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 No balm can assuage its sting. Death alone can 
 heal its wound. When it has once possessed a man 
 he has no ear but for the tale that falls like molten 
 lead upon the heart. 
 
 In nothing is jealousy more commonly shown 
 than when under the fear that some one will sup- 
 plant us in the affections of another. Here it assumes 
 its most malignant form, here its greatest distress is 
 wrought. The gamester, whose last piece is lost ; 
 the merchant, whose whole risk the sea has swal- 
 lowed up ; the child, whose air bubble has burst — 
 may each create a bauble like the former. But he 
 whose treasure was in woman's love, who trusted as 
 man once trusts and was deceived — that hope once 
 gone, there is no finding it again, no restoring it. 
 Let not any too rigorously judge the conduct of a 
 jealous woman or a jealous man. Remember that 
 the maniac suffers. To be sure, the suffering is 
 from selfishness, often it is without the shadow of a 
 cause ; but still it is suffering, and it is intense. 
 Pity it, bear with it ; you may yourself fall into 
 temptation. 
 
 It is said that jealousy is love. This is not true; 
 for, though jealousy may be procured by love, as 
 ashes are by fire, yet jealousy extinguishes love, as 
 ashes smother the flame. Jealousy may exist with- 
 out love, and this is common, for jealousy can feed 
 on that which is bitter no less than on that which is 
 sweet, and is sustained by pride as often as by 
 affection. 
 
 The unfortunate habit of mind which makes one 
 
JEALOUSY. 453 
 
 prone to jealousy can not be too strenuously fought 
 against. It were well to constantly remember that 
 jealousy injures and pains no one so much as the 
 person feeling it. It is a self-consuming fire, a self- 
 inflicted torment, an arrow that falls back and wounds 
 only the archer. It becomes one to cultivate a spirit 
 of magnanimity toward all, and to strive to allay, by 
 every means in his power, a too suspicious nature. 
 It has been well said that there are occasions on 
 which a man would have been ashamed of himself 
 not to have been deceived. A man to be genuine to 
 himself must believe and be believed, must trust and 
 be trusted. 
 
 Suspicion is no less an enemy to virtue than to 
 happiness. He that is already corrupt is naturally 
 suspicious, and he that becomes suspicious will 
 quickly become corrupt. Suspicion is the child of 
 guilt, the virtue of a coward. It is a vain and fool- 
 ish pride which would teach that every one is con- 
 spiring against your happiness or has designs on your 
 reputation and business. The fact is, probably no 
 one is thinking of you. Yet your jealous disposition 
 magnifies every little circumstance, and thus you are 
 continually making yourself unhappy when no real 
 cause exists. You are to strive against such an un- 
 fortunate disposition at all times. And it can be 
 eradicated. It is not the liberally educated, those 
 who have read much and thought more, who are 
 thus suspicious and jealous in disposition ; but it is 
 the narrow-minded, the illiterate, and the vulgar. 
 
454 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 " For of all sad words of tongue or pen, 
 The saddest are these, 'It might have been.'" 
 
 — Whittier. 
 
 |lp|HERE is not a word in the English tongue which 
 £#5 signifies more than the word regret. It ex- 
 jj presses every degree of pain in the gamut of 
 sorrow, from the childish regret for a lost play- 
 thing, to the remorse which, when the sands of life 
 are almost run, contemplates a wasted life. 
 
 There are none who have not felt its potency ; 
 no age escapes it, and such will ever be the case as 
 long as it is human to err. But as pain and sick- 
 ness are the sentinels which guard the life and health 
 of the body, so it is regret which keeps conscience 
 alive in man and sustains the moral faculties in the 
 discharge of duty. Life is full of sorrowful scenes, 
 so much that could not have been avoided ; but how 
 much added force there is to sorrow when we reflect 
 that we are to blame — that we knew at the time that 
 we were doing wrong — that we disregarded the 
 warning voice of conscience, contemptuously rejected 
 the proffered advice of others, and have nothing to 
 extenuate the keen regret gathered with the harvest 
 of sorrow sown by our own negligence. 
 
 The profoundest sorrow is not brought upon us 
 by the world, by its bitterness, its malice, its injus- 
 tice, or its persecution. These, indeed, affect us, 
 and make us wiser, more weak, or more brave. We 
 
BEG BET. 455 
 
 can, if we choose, repel the world's wrongs. We 
 can laugh at the injuries inflicted upon us, and hurl 
 defiance upon them ; or, if we can not command this 
 spirit, we may patiently endure what we do not re- 
 sent. But the sorrows we bring upon ourselves by 
 our own lack of discretion, or heedless obstinacy, 
 when regret adds its sting, then it is that we expe- 
 rience what real sorrow is. We can not then repel 
 its attacks with indifference. 
 
 Regret is the heart's sorrow for past offenses, — 
 the soul's prompting to better actions. Have you 
 ever stood by the grave of one dear to you, and 
 been compelled to remember how much happier you 
 might have made that life which has now passed be- 
 yond your reach ? Has the hasty or unkind word 
 ever come back to you and repeated itself over and 
 over, until you would gladly have given a year of 
 your own life to have recalled it, and made it as if it 
 had never been ? Let us remember that those who 
 are now living may soon be dead, and beware of 
 adding to the things done that ought not to have 
 been done, the things undone that ought to have 
 been done. Many a heart has languished for the 
 tenderness withheld in life, but poured out too late 
 in remorse and unavailing regret. 
 
 Let us be tender to our friends while they are 
 with us, — not wait till they are gone to find out 
 their good qualities. Let us be kind and gentle now, 
 and not wait for regret to tell us of duty undone. 
 The way of life is so full of occasions that call forth 
 real regret, that it would seem that there was little 
 
456 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 danger of manifesting regret where it was uncalled 
 for and useless. Yet such spectacles are of daily 
 occurrence. When one has done the best he can, 
 he should let that fact console him, and not give way 
 to causeless regret and a wish that he had done 
 differently. 
 
 Under the guiding light of the present it is easy 
 enough to discover the mistakes of the past ; and it 
 would be easy to make advantageous changes were 
 we allowed to go back and commence anew in the 
 journey of life. But alas ! this is vain. What we 
 should do is so to learn by reason of regret from the 
 lessons of the past that we become fully fitted for the 
 duties of the present. Regret, if deep and hopeless, 
 becomes remorse, which settles down over the heart 
 with a crushing weight, driving from thence all hope, 
 unless, indeed, the angel of forgiveness brings con- 
 solation to the soul. 
 
 There are many walking the earth whose lives 
 are shadowed by some great sorrow, to which is 
 added the pain of regret caused by their own heed- 
 less and inconsiderate actions. With one, it is the 
 sorrow of a reputation gone, — some act of folly 
 swept away the fair name founded on years of honest 
 living. With another, it is the shadow of a grave 
 dark and deep which covers the form of one whom 
 death claimed before he had redressed some wrong 
 done, carelessly perhaps, and with no intention of 
 lasting injury. Hasty and inconsiderate marriages 
 cause much vain repining and regret. The happi- 
 ness of life is gone ; the hopes of a home, endearing 
 
REGRET. 457 
 
 companionship, are fled, because hasty and inconsid- 
 erate action was taken where care and study was 
 required. Of all regrets, the remorse that must 
 accompany the closing moments of a misspent life 
 must possess the sharpest sting. Life and its pos- 
 sibilities allowed to go to waste from a lack of con- 
 sideration on our part ! Oh, that the young would 
 give heed to the warning voice of experience, and 
 thus escape the vain regrets of later years ! 
 
 To escape regret, it is necessary to form the 
 habit of doing your whole duty and avoiding impul- 
 sive actions. Pause before you say a hasty or a 
 cruel thing. Human life is so uncertain, are you 
 sure that you will have a chance to make it right 
 before death will have claimed the object of your mo- 
 mentary anger ? Tears and expressions of regret 
 are of no avail when addressed to cold clay. Pause 
 before doing a hasty or inconsiderate action. It may 
 be of such a nature that you can not undo its effects. 
 It may embitter your whole after life. Reflection is 
 your good angel ; give heed to her warning voice. 
 How are you spending your life ? Are you living as 
 becomes a man and immortal being ? Are^you striv- 
 ing to make the most of life and its possibilities ? If 
 not, be warned in time, and turn from your ways. 
 When life is nearly ended you will think of the past, 
 — wonder at your actions, and sigh for the days of 
 youth. They will not come to you again ; therefore, 
 make the most of them now. Thus will }'o u spare 
 yourself many vain regrets, and your closing days 
 will be days of peace. 
 
458 GOLDEN OEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 "Lull'd in the countless chambers of the brain, 
 
 Our thoughts are linked by many a hidden chain. 
 
 Awake but one, and lo, what myriads rise ! 
 
 Each stamps its image as the other flies." 
 
 —Pope. 
 
 ffSOME one has said that of all the gifts with 
 <^3 which a beneficent Providence has endowed man 
 W the gift of memory is the noblest. Without it 
 life would be a blank, a dreary void, an inex- 
 tricable chaos, an unlettered page cast upon the vast 
 ocean of uncertainty. Memory is the cabinet of 
 the imagination, the treasury of reason, the registry 
 of conscience, and the council chamber of thought. 
 It is the only paradise we are sure of always pos- 
 sessing. Even our first parents could not be driven 
 out of it. The memory of good actions is the star- 
 light of the soul. Memory tempers prosperity by 
 recalling past distresses, mitigates adversity by bring- 
 ing up the thoughts of past joys, it controls youth 
 and delights old age. 
 
 Memory is the golden cord binding all the natu- 
 ral gifts and excellences together, and though it is 
 not wisdom in itself, still it is the primary and funda- 
 mental power without which there could be no other 
 intellectual operations. Memory is often accused of 
 treachery and inconstancy, when, if inquired into, 
 the fault will be found to rest with ourselves. Al- 
 though nature has wisely proportioned the strength 
 
 
MEMORY. 459 
 
 and liberality of this gift to various intellects, yet all 
 have it in their power to improve it by classing, by 
 analyzing and arranging the different subjects which 
 successively occupy their minds. By these means 
 habits of thought and reflection are required, which 
 will materially conduce to the invigorating of the un- 
 derstanding, the improvement of the mind, and the 
 strengthening and correction of the mental powers. 
 
 A quick and retentive memory both of words and 
 things is an invaluable treasure, and may be had by 
 any one who will take the necessary pains. Educa- 
 tors sometimes in their anxiety to secure a wide range 
 of studies fail to sufficiently impress on their scholars' 
 minds the value of memory. This memory is one of 
 the most valuable gifts God has bestowed upon us, 
 and one of the most mysterious. The more it is 
 called upon to exercise its proper function the more 
 it is able to do, and there seems to be no limit to its 
 power. It is not what one has learned, but what he 
 remembers and applies that makes him wise. Still 
 memory should be used as the store-house, not as 
 a lumber-room. The mind must be trained to 
 think as well as remember, and to remember princi- 
 ples and outlines rather than words and sentences. 
 
 It is an old saying that we forget nothing, as 
 people in fever begin suddenly to talk the language 
 of their infancy. We are stricken by memory some- 
 times, and old reflections rush back to us as vivid as 
 in the time when they were our daily talk. We 
 think of faces, and they return to us as plainly as 
 when their presence gladdened our eyes and their 
 
460 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 accents thrilled in our ears. Many an affection that 
 apparently came to an end, and dropped out of life 
 one way or another, was only lying dormant. A 
 scent, a note of music, a voice long unheard, the 
 stirring of the Summer breeze may startle us with 
 the sudden revival of long forgotten feelings and 
 thoughts. 
 
 Memory can glean, but can never renew. It 
 brings us joys faint as the perfume of the flowers, 
 faded and dried of the Summer that is gone. Who 
 is there whose heart is dead to the memories of his 
 childhood days ? Old times steal upon us, quietly 
 making us young again, even amid the din of busi- 
 ness and the whirl of household cares ! The careworn 
 face relaxes its tension and the saddened brow clears 
 for a time as some well-remembered scene rushes 
 through the mind, bringing back the childhood home 
 and the loved faces which met around the daily 
 board. 
 
 We love to think of days that are past if they 
 were days of happiness, and even experience a sad 
 pleasure in recalling days of sadness. The man or 
 woman who loves to look back upon the direction 
 and counsel of a wise father and faithful mother will 
 seldom do an unworthy or unjust act. And we find 
 the most degraded at times marveling as to what led 
 them into sin, because the remembrance of a happy 
 home is theirs — a home of purity, of a father's and 
 mother's loving counsel and upright example. 
 
 When sorrow and trial, care and temptation, sur- 
 round us how often do we gain courage and renewed 
 
MEMORY. 461 
 
 strength by thinking of the past. The bankrupt 
 loves to think that he started on a fair basis from 
 the cradle. And the worldly woman, who seems 
 plunged in the vortex of fashionable pleasure, stops 
 to think that it was not always thus, that a devoted 
 mother taught her nobler things, and an earnest 
 father bade her live for some real object in life. 
 Just that moment's reflection may sow the seed 
 which will develop into a life of charity and good 
 works among her fellow-mortals. And that con- 
 demned criminal — who knows what memory recalls 
 to his view? Perhaps it was a home from whence 
 the incense of daily prayer ascended to God — where 
 kind words enforced a cheerful obedience to wise 
 counsels. Disturb him not; the influence is holy — 
 't is memory's voice urging him to final repentance. 
 
 We love to think of the unbroken circle ; the 
 curly heads of the children, and the various disposi- 
 tions that marked them ; the childish employments 
 and aspirations ; the mischievous pranks and merited 
 punishment; and the quiet hour when the mother, 
 gathering the little ones about her, told them of the 
 better life to come, and sought earnestly to teach 
 them that here below we live as school children, 
 gaining an education that shall fit us for the brighter 
 home hereafter. But these thoughts are not alto- 
 gether of joyous scenes. Change and death ap- 
 peared on the scene, and strangers came to dwell in 
 the home of our childhood. 
 
 It is strange what slight things suffice to recall 
 the scenes of childhood. A fallen tree, a house in 
 
462 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 ruins, a pebbly bank, or the flowers by the wayside, 
 arrest our steps, and carry the thoughts back to 
 other days. In fancy we again visit the mossy 
 bank by the wayside, where we so often sat for hours 
 drinking in the beauty of the primrose with our eyes ; 
 the sheltered glen, darkly green, filled with the per- 
 fume of violets that shone in their intense blue like 
 another sky spread upon the earth ; the laughter of 
 merry voices, are all brought back to memory by the 
 simplest causes. 
 
 The reminiscences of youth are a trite theme, but 
 it possesses an interest which the world can not dis- 
 lodge from our breasts. If all then was not uninter- 
 rupted sunshine, yet the clouds flew rapidly by, and 
 left no permanent shade behind them, as do those 
 of mature years. From the covenants of friendship 
 then we thought in after days to enjoy the benefits 
 and treasures of love. But the forces of life have 
 driven us asunder, and swept away all but the 
 memory of the past. How different the contrast in 
 thoughts and feelings then and now! Then it was 
 the trusting confidence of childhood; now it is the 
 doubting mind that hath tasted of the world's insin- 
 cerity. We had faith then, but we have doubts now. 
 
 The heart must, nay, it has, grown old, and is 
 full of cares. It will relate at length the history of 
 its sorrows, but it has few joys to communicate. 
 Memory seldom fails when its office is to show us 
 the tomb of our buried hopes. Joy's recollection is 
 no longer joy, but sorrow's memory is a sorrow still. 
 The memory of past favors is like a rainbow — bright, 
 
MEMORY. 463 
 
 beautiful, and vivid — but it soon fades away ; the 
 memory of injuries is engraved on the heart, and 
 remains forever. The course of none has been along 
 so beaten a road that they remember not fondly some 
 resting-places in their journey, some turns in their 
 path in which lovely prospects broke in upon them, 
 some plats of green refreshing to their weary feet. 
 
 Some one has said: " Memory is ever active, ever 
 true; alas, if it were only as easy to forget!" Mem- 
 ory is a faithful steward, and holds to view many 
 scenes over which we would fain drop the curtain of 
 oblivion and let the dust of forgetfulness cover them 
 from view. What a relief could we but forget that 
 angry word ! The uncalled-for harshness and the 
 passionate outbreak that went unrecalled so long 
 that death intervened — O could we but erase their 
 remembrance ! But no, with a retaliative justice 
 memory summons us to review them ! Words which 
 can never be recalled, deeds whose effect on others 
 can never be effaced, how they come, one by one, 
 showing us how useless our lives have been — how 
 vain! Still, these memories are friends in disguise, 
 for they are faithful monitors, and are experience's 
 ready prompters. How much is spoken which de- 
 serves no remembrance, and which does not serve as 
 a single link in one's existence, not calling forth one 
 result for others' weal, or thrilling one chord with 
 nobler impulses ! 
 
 How beautiful to distinguish the pearls in the 
 rush of events — this torrent of scenes both sad and 
 pleasing! The gift of memory is diversified to dif- 
 
464 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 ferent people, some having a taste for history, some 
 for literature ; others delight in politics, and so on 
 through all the different phases of existence, with its 
 diversity of thought and feeling. Memory has been 
 compared to a vast storehouse. How important, then, 
 that we inure the mind to healthful actions instead of 
 feeding it on poisons until it will produce naught but 
 poisonous thoughts ! Look at the world of literature 
 and science. Why not delve in its mines of glitter- 
 ing, genuine treasures? Inasmuch as the mind de- 
 rives much of its pleasures from thoughts of the past 
 it becomes all to provide, as far as possible, for 
 happy reminiscences. This is the reward of right 
 living. An aged person whose thoughts revert to a 
 life of self-denial and exertion in virtue's ways has a 
 source of happiness, pure and unalloyed, which is 
 denied to him whose guiding rule of life has been 
 selfishness. 
 
 Memory has a strange power of crowding years 
 into moments. This is observed ofttimes when death 
 is about to close the scene. As the sunlight breaks 
 from the clouds and across the hills at the close of a 
 stormy day, lighting up the distant horizon, even so 
 does memory, when the light of life is fast disappear- 
 ing in the darkness of death, break forth and illume 
 the most distant scenes and incidents of past years. 
 And the very clouds of sorrow which have drifted 
 between are lighted up with a glorious light. As 
 the soft, clear chimes of the silvery bells at the 
 vesper hour float down on the shadowy wings of 
 evening, even so are the thoughts of old age. They 
 
hope. 465 
 
 recall scenes past, their memory being all that is left 
 now. It may be the face of a mother, the smile of 
 a sister, a father's kind voice, all stilled by death. 
 Many of these thoughts are too sacred to expose to 
 the gaze of the curious ; they are their only treas- 
 ures ; beware of drawing back the curtain which 
 conceals them from your view. 
 
 ''Auspicious hope! in thy sweet gardens grow 
 Wreaths for each toil, a charm for every woe." 
 
 |||1|LL that happens in the world is directly or in- 
 directly brought about by hope. Not a stroke 
 of work would be done were it not in hopes 
 of some glorious reward. It matters not that 
 it generally paves the way to disappointment. Phce- 
 nix-like it rises from its ashes and bids us forget the 
 disappointment of the present in the contemplation 
 of future delights. Hope, then, is the principal anti- 
 dote which keeps our hearts from bursting under the 
 pressure of evils. 
 
 Some call hope the manna from heaven that com- 
 forts us in all extremities; others the pleasant flat- 
 terer that caresses the unhappy with expectations of 
 happiness in the bosom of futurity. But if hope be 
 a flatterer she is the most upright of all the flattering 
 
 parasites, since she frequents the poor man's hut as 
 
 30 
 
466 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 well as the palace of his superiors. It is common 
 to all men; those who possess nothing more are 
 still cheered by hope. When all else fails us hope 
 still abides with us. 
 
 Used with a due prudence hope acts as a health- 
 ful tonic; intemperately indulged, as an enervating 
 opiate. The vision of future triumph, which at first 
 animates exertion, if dwelt upon too strongly, will 
 usurp the place of the reality, and noble objects will 
 be contemplated, not for their own inherent worth, 
 or with a design of compassing their execution, but 
 for the day-dreams they engender. Hope sheds a 
 sweet radiance on the stream of life, and never exerts 
 her magic except to our advantage. We seldom 
 attain what she beckons us to pursue, but her decep- 
 tions resemble those which the dying husbandman in 
 the fable practiced upon his sons, who, by telling 
 them of a hidden mass of wealth which he had 
 buried in his vineyard, led them so carefully to 
 delve the ground that they found, indeed, a treasure, 
 though not in gold, in wine. 
 
 Reasonable hope is endowed with a vigorous prin- 
 ciple ; it sets the head and heart to work, and ani- 
 mates one to do his utmost, and thus, by perpetually 
 pushing and assuring, it puts a difficulty out of 
 countenance, and makes a seeming impossibility give 
 way. Human life hath not a surer friend nor, many 
 times, a greater enemy than hope. It is the misera- 
 ble man's god, which, in the hardest grip of calamity, 
 never fails to yield him beams of comfort. It is the 
 presumptuous man's devil, which leads him awhile in 
 
hope. 467 
 
 a smooth way, and then lets him break his neck on 
 the sudden. 
 
 How many would die did not hope sustain them ! 
 How many have died by hoping too much! This 
 wonder may we find in hope — that she is both a 
 flatterer and a true friend. True hope is based on 
 energy of character. A strong mind always hopes, 
 and has always cause to hope, because it knows the 
 mutability of human affairs, and how slight a circum- 
 stance may change the whole course of events. Such 
 a spirit, too, rests upon itself; it is not confined to 
 partial views, or to one particular object, and if at 
 last all should be lost it has saved itself its own in- 
 tegrity and worth. 
 
 It is best to hope only for things possible and 
 probable ; he that hopes too much shall deceive him- 
 self at last, especially if his industry does not go 
 along with his hopes, for hope without action is a 
 barren undoer. Hope awakens courage, but de- 
 spondency is the last of all evils ; it is the abandon- 
 ment of good — the giving up of the battle of life 
 with dead nothingness. When the other emotions 
 are controlled by events hope remains buoyant and 
 undismayed, — unchanged, amidst the most adverse 
 circumstances. Causes that effect, with depression, 
 every other emotion appear to give fresh elasticity 
 to hope. No oppression can crush its buoyancy ; 
 from under every weight it rebounds ; amid the most 
 depressing circumstances it preserves its cheering 
 influence ; no disappointment can annihilate its power ; 
 no experience can deter us from listening to its sweet 
 
468 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 illusions ; it seems a counterpoise for misfortune, an 
 equivalent for every disappointment. 
 
 It springs early into existence ; it abides through 
 all the changes of life, and reaches into the futurity 
 of time. In the midst of disappointments it whispers 
 consolation, and in all the arduous trials of life it is 
 a strong staff and support. If, in the warmth of 
 anticipation, it prepares the way for the very disap- 
 pointments to which it afterwards administers relief 
 it must be confessed that, in the severer inflictions of 
 adversity, which come upon us unlooked for, and 
 where previously the voice of sorrow was never 
 heard, it then appears like an angel of mercy, and 
 frequently assuages the anguish of suffering, and 
 wipes the dropping tears from the eyes. 
 
 Hope lives in the future, but dies in the present. 
 Its estate is one of expectancy. It draws large drafts 
 on a small credit, which are seldom honored when 
 presented at the bank of experience, but have the 
 rare faculty of passing readily elsewhere. Hope 
 calculates its schemes for a long and durable life, 
 presses forward to imaginary points of bliss, and 
 grasps at impossibilities, and, consequently, very 
 often ensnares men into beggary, ruin, and dishonor. 
 Hope is a great calculator, but a poor mathemati- 
 cian. Its problems are seldom based on true data, 
 and their demonstration is more often fictitious than 
 otherwise. 
 
 There is a morality in every true hope which is a 
 source of consolation to all who rightly seek rL It is 
 a good angel within that whispers of triumph over 
 
hope. 469 
 
 evil, of the success of good, of the victory of truth, 
 of the achievement of right. " It hopeth all things." 
 It is a strong ingredient of courage. Under its guid- 
 ing light what great events have been wrought to a 
 successful completion ! It is a friend of virtue. Its 
 religion is full of glorious anticipations. It encour- 
 ages all things good, great, and noble. 
 
 It is not surprising when we reflect on the nature 
 of hope that we find it to be such a mainspring to 
 human action. It is the parent of all effort and en- 
 deavor, and " every gift of noble origin is breathed 
 upon by hope's perpetual breath." It may be said 
 to be the moral engine that moves the world and 
 keeps it in action. Every true hope which has for 
 its object some great and noble design is an unex- 
 pressed prayer, which flies on angel's wings to the 
 throne of God, and returns to the struggling one a 
 precious benison of inspiration to go forth on his 
 errand of good. 
 
 A true hope we can touch somehow through all 
 the lights and shadows of life. It is a prophecy ful- 
 filled in part — God's earnest money paid into our 
 hands, that he will be ready with the whole when we 
 are ready for it. It is the sunlight on the hill-top 
 when the valley is dark as death ; the spirit touching 
 us all through our pilgrimage, and then soaring 
 away with us into the blessed life where we may ex- 
 pect either that the fruition will be entirely equal 
 to the hope, or that the old glamour will come over 
 us again, and beckon us on forever as the choicest 
 gift heaven has to give. 
 
470 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 "Hope deferred," saith the proverb, " maketh 
 the heart sick." But we are prone to be too dicta- 
 torial as to how we enjoy life ; too positive. We 
 must not determine that their fulfillment must come 
 in just the way we wish, or else we will be miserable 
 in the grief of disappointment. • It is not for man 
 wholly to determine his steps. Sometimes what he 
 thinks for his good turns out ill ; and what he thinks 
 a great evil develops a great blessing in disguise. 
 It is folly, almost madness, to be miserable because 
 things are not as we would have them, or because 
 we are disappointed in our plans. Many of our 
 plans must be defeated for our own good. A mul- 
 titude of little hopes must every day be crushed, and 
 now and then a great one. 
 
 But while we may be all wrong in our thoughts 
 of the special form in which our blessing will come, 
 we need not fail of the blessing. It may be like the 
 mirage, shifting from horizon to horizon as we plod 
 wearily along ; but in the fullness of God's own time 
 we shall reap if we faint not. There is always a 
 sadness in the dying of a great hope. It is like the 
 setting of the sun. The brightness of our life is 
 gone, shadows of the evening fall behind us, and the 
 world seems but a dim reflection of itself — a broader 
 shadow. We look forward into the lonely night. 
 The soul withdraws itself. Then stars arise, and the 
 night is holy. 
 
 Hopes and fears checker human life. The one 
 serves to keep us from presumption, the other from 
 despair. Hope is the last thing that dieth in man. 
 
HOPE. 471 
 
 Though it may be deceptive, yet it is of this good 
 use to us, that while we are traveling through this 
 life it conducts us in an easier and more pleasant 
 way to our journey's end. There is no one so fallen 
 but that he may have hopes ; nor is any so exalted 
 as to be beyond the reach of fears. " When faith, 
 temperance, and other celestial powers left the earth," 
 says one of the ancient writers, " Hope was the only 
 goddess that stayed behind." 
 
 The man who carries a lantern in a dark night 
 can have friends walking safely by the light of its 
 rays, and not be defrauded himself. So he who is 
 of cheerful disposition, and has the light of hope in 
 his breast, can help on many others in this world's 
 darkness, not to his own loss, but to their gain. 
 Hope is an anchor to the soul, both sure and stead- 
 fast, that will restrain our frail bark and enable us 
 to outride the storms of time. 
 
 There are so many humiliations in this world ! The 
 secret is to rise above them, to throw off dissatisfac- 
 tion, and to grasp some pleasing hope, grateful and 
 beneficial to the mind. We are encompassed by 
 illusions and delusions. We need the comforting 
 promises of the heart — a steadfast faith in the good 
 and true, and hopefulness in all things, especially of 
 futurity. Hope is rich and glorious, and faithfully 
 should it be cultivated. Let its inspiring influence 
 grow in the heart ; it will give strength and courage. 
 
 Let the cheerful word fall from the lips, and the 
 smile play upon the countenance. The way of the 
 world is dark enough even to the most favored ones 
 
472 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 among us. Why not, then, gather all the happiness 
 out of life that you can ? Why not strive to culti- 
 vate the cheerful, hopeful disposition that will enable 
 you to see the silver lining to every cloud ? By such 
 a course you will do much to assuage the sorrows 
 and to increase the joys and pleasures of life. 
 
 PROSPERITY is the great test of human char- 
 acter. Many are not able to endure prosperity. 
 It is like the light of the sun to a weak eye — 
 glorious, indeed, in itself, but not proportioned 
 to such an instrument. Greatness stands upon a 
 precipice, and if prosperity carries a man ever so 
 little beyond his poise, it overbears and dashes him 
 to pieces. 
 
 Moderate prosperity is not only to be hopefully 
 expected as the proper reward of a life's exertion, but 
 to bring the best human qualities to any thing like 
 perfection, to fill them with the sweet juices of 
 courtesy and charity, prosperity, or a moderate 
 amount of it, is required, just as sunshine is needed 
 for the ripening of peaches and apricots. But pros- 
 perity, if it be good for the encouragement of hu- 
 manity, is full of danger as well. There is ever a 
 certain languor attending the fullness. When the 
 heart has no more to wish, it yawns over its posses- 
 sion, and the energy of the soul goes out like a 
 
PROSPERITY. 473 
 
 flame that has no more to devour. A smooth sea 
 never made skillful mariners, neither do uninterrupted 
 prosperity and success qualify men for usefulness and 
 happiness. The storms of adversity, like those of 
 the ocean, rouse the faculties and excite the inven- 
 tion, prudence, and skill of the voyager. The mar- 
 tyrs of ancient times, in bracing their minds to 
 outward calamities, acquired a loftiness of purpose 
 and a moral heroism worth a life-time of softness and 
 security. 
 
 It seems as if man were like the earth. It can 
 not bask forever in the sunshine. The snows of 
 Winter and its frosts must come and work in the 
 ground, and mellow it to make it fruitful, A man 
 upon whom continuous sunshine falls is like the earth 
 in August — he becomes parched, hard, and close- 
 grained. To some men the Winter and Spring come 
 when they are young. Others are born in Summer, 
 and made fit to live only by a Winter of sorrow 
 coming to them when they are middle-aged or old. 
 But come it must, and under its softening influence 
 the mind is fitted for the routine of life, and then the 
 warm, shining sun of prosperity spreads abroad in 
 the heart its vivifying influence, and the best powers 
 of man are developed. 
 
 The way to prosperity is as plain as the way to 
 market. It depends chiefly on two words — industry 
 and frugality; that is, waste neither time nor money, 
 but make the best use of both. Without industry 
 and frugality nothing will do, and with them every 
 thing. There is no other way to arrive at a true 
 
474 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 prosperity. It is gained only by diligent application 
 to the business of life. The men who may be said to 
 be prosperous are seldom men who have been rocked 
 in the cradle of indulgence or caressed in the lap of 
 luxury, but they are men whom necessity has called 
 from the shade of retirement to contend under the 
 scorching rays of the sun with the stern realities of 
 life, with all of its vicissitudes. 
 
 Many make the mistake of supposing that pros- 
 perity and happiness are identical terms. The most 
 prosperous are often the most miserable, while happi- 
 ness may dwell with him whose every effort has 
 failed, provided only that he hath done his best. 
 There is, therefore, a true and a false prosperity, 
 much resembling each other. But the similarity is in 
 resemblance only, for they differ in constitution. The 
 one is true and substantial, and is the result of a 
 well-lived life. Its rewards are inward content and 
 surroundings of comfort ; the enjoyment of the real 
 blessings of life and the unfolding of all the better 
 nature of man. Its imitation is the reward gained 
 by unjust or dishonest means. It may have the 
 luster, but it lacketh the ring and weight of the true 
 metal. It may have the outward adornment, but can 
 not bring its possessor the inward peace of him who 
 hath the former. Instead of unfolding and expand- 
 ing the heart of man, it hardens it and dries up the 
 better nature. 
 
 Engage in one kind of business only, and stick to 
 it until you succeed, or until your experience shows 
 that you should abandon it. A constant hammering 
 
PROSPERITY. 475 
 
 will generally drive it home at last so that it can be 
 clinched. When a man's undivided attention is cen- 
 tered on one object his mind will be constantly sug- 
 gesting improvements of value, which would escape 
 him were his brain occupied by a dozen different 
 objects at once. Many a fortune has slipped through 
 a man's fingers because of attention thus engaged ; 
 there is good sense in the old caution against having 
 too many irons in the fire at once. 
 
 Adversity in early life often lays the foundation 
 for future prosperity. The hand of adversity is cold, 
 but it is the hand of a friend. It dispels from the 
 youthful mind the pleasing, but vain, illusions of un- 
 taught fancy, and shows that the road to success and 
 prosperity is always a road requiring energetic action 
 to surmount its difficulties. There is something sub- 
 lime in the resolute, fixed purpose of him who deter- 
 mines to rise superior to ill-fortune. "At thy first 
 entrance upon thy estate," saith a wise man, "keep a 
 low sail that thou mayest rise with honor ; thou canst 
 not decline without shame ; he that begins where his 
 father ends will generally end where his father began." 
 
 As full ears load and lay corn so does too much 
 fortune bend and break the mind. It deserves to be 
 considered, too, as another advantage, that affliction 
 moves pity and reconciles our enemies ; but pros- 
 perity provokes envy and loses us even our friends. 
 Again, adversity is a desolate and abandoned state, 
 and, as rats and mice forsake a tottering house, so 
 do the generality of men forsake him who is cast 
 down by adversity. As a consequence, he who has 
 
476 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 never known adversity is but half acquainted with 
 others or with himself, and can not be expected to 
 put forth full measure of his powers. 
 
 The patient conquest of difficulties which rise in 
 the regular and legitimate channels of business and 
 enterprise is not only essential in securing the ulti- 
 mate prosperity which you seek, but it is requisite 
 to prepare your mind for enjoying your prosperity. 
 Every-where in human experience, as frequently as 
 in nature, hardship is essential to ultimate success. 
 That magnificent oak was detained twenty years in 
 its upward growth while its roots took a great turn 
 around a bowlder, by which the tree was anchored to 
 withstand the storms of centuries. They who are 
 eminently prosperous, or who achieve greatness or 
 even notoriety in any pursuit, must expect to make 
 enemies. Whoever becomes distinguished is sure to 
 be a mark for the malicious spite of those who, not 
 deserving success themselves, are galled by the mer- 
 ited triumph of the more worthy. Moreover, the 
 opposition which originates in such despicable mo- 
 tives is sure to be of the most unscrupulous char- 
 acter, hesitating at no iniquity, descending to the 
 shabbiest littleness. Opposition, if it is honest and 
 manly, is not in itself undesirable. It is the whet- 
 stone by which a highly tempered nature is polished 
 and sharpened. Uninterrupted prosperity shows us 
 but one side of the world. For, as it surrounds us 
 with friends who will tell us only our merits, so it 
 silences those enemies from whom alone we can learn 
 our defects. 
 
TRIFLES. 477 
 
 'T is to the contempt of details that many men 
 may trace the cause of their present misfortune. 
 The world is full of those who languish, not from 
 a lack of talents, but because, in spite of their 
 many brilliant parts, they lack the power of properly 
 estimating the value of trifles. Their souls fire with 
 lofty conceptions of some work to be achieved, their 
 minds warm with enthusiasm as they contemplate 
 the objects already attained; but when they begin to 
 put the scheme into execution they turn away in 
 disgust from the dry minutiae and vulgar drudgery 
 which are requisite for its accomplishment. Such 
 men bewail their fate. Failing to do the small tasks 
 of life, they have no calls to higher ones, and so 
 complain of neglect. 
 
 As the universe itself is composed of minute 
 atoms, so it is little details, mere trifles, which go to 
 make success in any calling. Attention to details is 
 an element of effectiveness which no reach of plan, 
 no loftiness of design, no enthusiasm of purpose can 
 dispense with. It is this which makes the difference 
 between the practical man, who pushes his thoughts 
 to a useful result, and the mere dreamer. If we 
 would do much good in the world we must be 
 willing to do good in little things, in little acts of be- 
 nevolence one after another; speaking a timely and 
 good word here, doing an act of kindness there, and 
 setting a good example always. We must do the 
 
478 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 first good thing we can, and then the next. This 
 is the only way to accomplish much in one's life- 
 time. He who waits to do a great deal of good 
 at once will never do any thing. 
 
 The disposition of mankind is to despise the little 
 incidents of every-day life. This is a lamentable 
 mistake, since nothing in this life is really small. In 
 the complicated and marvelous machinery of circum- 
 stances it is absolutely impossible to decide what 
 would have happened as to some event if the small- 
 est deviation had taken place in the march of those 
 that preceded them. In a factory we may observe the 
 revolving wheel in one room and in another, many 
 yards distant, the silk issuing from the loom, rivaling 
 in its tints the colors of the rainbow. There are 
 many events in our lives, the distance between which 
 was much greater than that between the wheel and 
 ribbon, yet the connection was much closer. It is, 
 indeed, strange on what petty trifles the crises of 
 life are decided. A chance meeting with some friend, 
 an unexpected delay in some business venture, may 
 be the source from which you date the rise of good 
 or ill fortune. 
 
 There are properly no trifles in the biography of 
 life. The little things in youth accumulate into char- 
 acter in age and destiny in eternity. Little sums 
 make up the grand total of life. Each day is bright- 
 ened or clouded by trifles. Great things come but 
 seldom, and are often unrecognized until they are 
 passed. It has been said that if a man conceives the 
 idea of becoming eminent in learning, and can not 
 
TRIFLES. 479 
 
 toil through the many little drudgeries necessary to 
 carry him on, his learning will soon be told. Or if 
 one undertakes to become rich, but despises the 
 small and gradual advances by which wealth is ordi- 
 narily acquired, his expectations will be the sum of 
 his riches. 
 
 The difference between first and second class 
 work in every department of labor lies chiefly in the 
 degree of care with which the minutiae are executed. 
 No matter whether born king or peasant, our inevi- 
 table accompaniment through life is a succession of 
 small duties, which must be met and overcome, or 
 else they will defeat our plans. When we reflect 
 that no matter what profession or business we may 
 follow, it demands the closest attention to a mass 
 of little and apparently insignificant details, then we 
 comprehend why it is that the patient plodder, the 
 slow but sure man, so universally surpasses the 
 genius who had such a brilliant career in college. 
 It is all very well to form vast schemes. It is, how- 
 ever, the homely . details of their execution that 
 furnish the crucial tests of character. The success- 
 ful business man at home, surrounded by articles of 
 luxury, is a spectacle calculated to spur on the 
 toiler. But the merchant at his office has had to 
 work with trifles, to toil over columns of figures to 
 post his ledger ; and while you were carelessly spend- 
 ing a dollar, he has ransacked his books to discover 
 what has become of a stray shilling. 
 
 In short, success in any pursuit can not be ob- 
 tained unless the trifling details of the business are 
 
480 GOLD EX GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 attended to. No one need hope to rise above his 
 present situation who suffers small things to pass 
 unimproved, or who, metaphorically speaking, neg- 
 lects to pick up a cent because it is not a shilling. 
 All successful men have been remarkable, not only 
 for general scope and vigor, but for their attention 
 to minute details. Like the steam hammer, they 
 can forge ponderous bolts or fashion a pin. It is 
 singular that in view of these facts men will neglect 
 details. Many even consider them beneath their no- 
 tice, and when they hear of the success of a business 
 man who is. perhaps, more " solid " than brilliant, 
 sneeringly remark that he is " great in little things.''' 
 But with character, fortune, and the concerns of life, 
 it is the littles combined that form the great whole. 
 If we look well to the disposition of these, the sum 
 total will be cared for. It is the pennies neglected 
 that squander the dollars. It is the minutes wasted 
 that wound the hours, and mar the day. 
 
 Much of the unhappiness of life is caused by 
 trifles. It is not the great bowlders, but the small 
 pebbles on the road, that bring the traveling horse 
 on his knees ; and it is the petty annoyances of life, 
 to be met and conquered afresh each day, that try 
 most severely the metal of which we are made. 
 Small miseries, like small debts, hit us in so many 
 places and meet us at so many turns and corners, 
 that what they lack in weight they make up in num- 
 ber, and render it less hazardous to stand the fire 
 of one cannon ball than a volley composed of such a 
 shower of bullets. The great sorrows of life are 
 
TRIFLES. - M 
 
 mercifully few, but the innumerable petty :r_rs of 
 every day occurrence cause many to grow weary of 
 the burden of life. 
 
 Those acts which go to form a person 5 Influence 
 are little things, but they are potential for good or 
 evil in the lives of others. From the little rivulets 
 we trace the : majestic rivers, con- 
 
 stantly widening until lost in the ocean; and so the 
 little things of an individual life, in their ever-widen- 
 ing influence for good or evil, diffusing misery or 
 happiness around them, are borne onward to swell 
 the joys or sorrows of the boundless ocean of eter- 
 :;::;.-. a::£ s:;:uli 'zt nctti aril ^aried ::.t m:r~ 
 carefully from their infinitely higher importance. 
 Words may seem to us cut little things, but they 
 possess a power beyond calculation. They swiftly fly 
 from us to others, and though we scarcely give them 
 a :;.; ; '.-.;; :h:u^h: :he:r sr'r:: !:vts Thrush :hey 
 are as fleeting ^s the breath that gave them, then- 
 influence is as enduring as the heart they reach. Ah 
 well may we guard our lips s: that none grieve in 
 silence over words we have carelessly dropped. Well 
 may we strive to scatter loving, cheering, encourag- 
 ing words, to soothe the weary, and awaken the 
 nobler, finer feelings of those with whom we daily 
 come in contact. 
 
 The happiness, also, of life is largely composed 
 of trifles. The occasions of great joys, like those of 
 great sorrows, are few and far between, but every- 
 day brings us much of good if we will but gather it. 
 "One principal reason says Jeremy Bentham, * why 
 
 31 
 
482 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 our existence has so much less of happiness crowded 
 into it than is accessible to us, is that we neglect to 
 gather up those minute particles of pleasure which 
 every moment offers for our acceptance. In striving 
 after a sum total, we forget the ciphers of which it is 
 composed ; struggling against inevitable results which 
 he can not control, too often man is heedless of those 
 accessible pleasures whose amount is by no means 
 inconsiderable when collected together ; stretching 
 out his hands to catch the stars, man forgets the 
 flowers at his feet, so beautiful, so fragrant, so mul- 
 titudinous, so various." 
 
 "Time was is past — thou canst not it recall; 
 Time is thou hast — employ the portion small; 
 Time future is not, and may never be ; 
 Time present is the only time for thee." 
 
 |I1|PARE moments are the gold-dust of time — the 
 ^pp portion of life most fruitful in good or evil. 
 W When gathered up and pressed into use im- 
 portant results flow from thence; when neg- 
 lected they are gaps through which temptation finds 
 a ready entrance. They are a treasure when rightly 
 used, but a terrible curse when abused. There are 
 three obligations resting upon us in regard to the 
 use and application of time. There is the duty to 
 ourselves, in the care of our happiness, our improve- 
 
LEISURE. 483 
 
 ment, and providing for our necessities; the duty to 
 those dependent upon ourselves, and to society ; and, 
 lastly, our accountability to God, who bestows upon 
 us this valuable gift, not without its being accompa- 
 nied with the greatest inducements and the strongest 
 and most cogent motives to improve it to advantage 
 in these different respects. 
 
 A celebrated Italian was wont to call his time his 
 estate ; and it is true of this, as of other estates of 
 which the young come into possession, that it is 
 rarely prized till it is nearly squandered, and then, 
 when life is fast waning, they begin to think of 
 spending the hours wisely, and even of husbanding 
 the moments. But habits of idleness, listlessness, 
 and procrastination once firmly fixed can not be sud- 
 denly thrown off, and the man who has wasted the 
 precious hours of life's seed-time finds that he can 
 not reap a harvest in life's Autumn. The value of 
 time is not realized. It is the most precious thing 
 in all the world; the only thing of which it is a vir- 
 tue to be covetous, and yet the only thing of which 
 all men are prodigal. Time is so precious that there 
 is never but one moment in the world at once, and 
 that is always taken away before another is given. 
 
 It is astonishing what can be done in any de- 
 partment of life when once the will is fired with a 
 determination to use the leisure time rightly. Only 
 take care to gather up your fragments of leisure 
 time, and employ them judiciously, and you will find 
 time for the accomplishment of almost any desired 
 purpose. Men who have the highest ambition to 
 
484 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 accomplish something of importance in this life fre- 
 quently complain of a lack of leisure. But the truth 
 is, there is no condition in which the chances of ac- 
 complishing great results are less than in that of 
 leisure. Life is composed of an elastic material, and 
 wherever a solid piece of business is removed the 
 surrounding atmosphere of trifles rushes in as cer- 
 tainly as the air into a bottle when you pour out its 
 contents. If you would not have your hours of leis- 
 ure frittered away on trifles you must guard it by 
 barriers of resolution and precaution as strong as are 
 needed for hours of study and business. 
 
 The people who, in any community, have done 
 the most for their own and the general good are not 
 the wealthy, leisurely people who have nothing to do, 
 but are almost uniformly the overworked class, who 
 seem well-nigh swamped with cares, and are in a 
 paroxysm of activity from January to December. 
 Persons of this class have learned how to economize 
 time, and, however crowded with business, are al- 
 ways found capable of doing a little more ; and you 
 may rely upon them in their busiest season with far 
 more assurance than upon the idle man. It is much 
 easier for one who is always exerting himself to exert 
 himself a little more for an extra purpose than for 
 him who does nothing to get up steam for the same 
 end. Give a busy man ten minutes in which to write 
 a letter, and he will dash it off at once ; give an idle 
 man a day, and he will put it off till to-morrow or 
 next week. There is a momentum in an active man 
 which of itself almost carries him to the mark, just 
 
LEISURE. 485 
 
 as a very light stroke will keep a hoop going when 
 a smart one was required to set it in motion. 
 
 The men who do the 'greatest things achieved on 
 this globe do them not so much by fitful efforts as by 
 steady, unremitting toil — by turning even the mo- 
 ments to account. They have the genius of hard 
 work — the most desirable kind of genius. The time 
 men often waste in needless slumber, in lounging, or 
 in idle visits, would enable them, were it employed, 
 to execute undertakings which seem to their hurried 
 and worried life to be impossible. Much may be 
 done in those little shreds and patches of time which 
 every day produces, and which most men throw away, 
 but which, nevertheless, will make, at the end of life, 
 no small deduction from the sum total. 
 
 Time, like life, can never be recalled. It is the 
 material out of which all great workers have secured 
 a rich inheritance of thoughts and deeds for their 
 successors. It has been written, "The hours perish, 
 and are laid to our charge." How many of these 
 there are upon the records of the past! How many 
 hours wasted, worse than wasted in frivolous con- 
 versation, useless employment — hours of which we 
 can give no account, and in which we benefited 
 neither ourselves nor others! There are few such 
 hours in the busiest lives, but they make up the 
 whole sum in the lives of many. Many live without 
 accomplishing any good ; squander their time away 
 in petty, trifling things, as if the only object in life 
 were to kill time, as if the earth were not a place for 
 probation, but our abiding residence. We do not 
 
486 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 value time as we should, but let many golden hours 
 pass by unimproved. We loiter during the day-time 
 of life, and ere we know it the night draws near 
 ''when no man can work." Oh, hours misspent 
 and wasted! How we wish we could live them over 
 again ! 
 
 It requires no small degree of effort to resolutely 
 employ one's time so as to allow none of it to go to 
 waste. There are a thousand causes tending to the 
 loss of time, and any one who imagines that they 
 would do great things if they only had leisure are 
 mistaken. They can find time if they only set about 
 doing it. Complain not, then, of your want of leis- 
 ure. Rather thank God that you are not cursed 
 with leisure, for a curse it is in nine cases out of ten. 
 What, if to achieve some good work which you have 
 deeply at heart, you can never command an entire 
 month, a week, or even a dav ? Shall you. therefore. 
 bid it an eternal adieu, and fold your arms in despair? 
 The thought should only the more keenly spur you 
 on to do what you can in this swiftly passing life of 
 yours. Endeavor to compass its solution by gather- 
 ing up the broken fragments of your time, rendered 
 more precious by their brevity. 
 
 Where they work much in gold the very dust of 
 the room is carefully gathered up for the lew grains 
 of gold that may thus be saved. Learn from this the 
 nobler economy of time. Glean up its golden dust. 
 economize with tenfold care those raspings and par- 
 ings of existence, those leavings of days and bits of 
 hours, so valueless singly, so inestimable in the 
 
LEISURE. 487 
 
 aggregate, and you will be rich in leisure. Rely 
 upon it, if you are a miser of moments, if you hoard 
 up and turn to account odd minutes and half-hours 
 and unexpected holidays, the five-minute gaps while 
 the table is spreading, your careful gleanings at the 
 end of life will have formed a colossal and solid block 
 of time, and you will die wealthier in good deeds 
 harvested than thousands whose time is all their own. 
 It has been written that "he who toys with time 
 trifles with a frozen serpent, which afterwards turns 
 upon the hand which indulged the sport, and inflicts 
 a deadly wound." There are many persons who 
 sadly realize this in their own lives. When age with 
 its frosts of years has come their reflections can not 
 be otherwise than of the saddest kind as they ponder 
 over wasted time, the hours they spent in a worse 
 than foolish manner. Death often touches with a 
 terrible emphasis the value of time. But, alas ! the 
 lesson comes too late. It is for the living wisely to 
 consider the end of their existence, to reflect on the 
 possibilities of life, to resolve to waste no time in 
 idleness, but to be up and doing in a manner befit- 
 ting one who lives here a life preparatory simply to 
 another and better existence. 
 
488 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 JAPPINESS is that single and glorious thing 
 
 which is the very light and sun of the whole 
 
 jj animated universe, and where she is not it 
 
 were better that nothing should be. Without 
 
 her wisdom is but a shadow, and virtue a name. 
 
 It is in the pursuit of happiness that the energies 
 of man are put forth. It matters not that we are 
 generally disappointed in the ultimate results of our 
 endeavors. Earthly happiness is a phantom of which 
 we hear much, but see little, whose promises are con- 
 stantly given and constantly broken, but as constantly 
 believed. She cheats us with the sound instead of 
 the substance, and with the blossom instead of the 
 fruit. Anticipation is her herald, but disappointment 
 is her companion. In the ideal sce^pe every thing is 
 painted in bright colors. There are no drawbacks, 
 no disappointments, in that picture, but in the reality 
 they are sure to appear. The anticipation of a pleas- 
 ure may have lasted for weeks in the mind, and have 
 been dwelt on in all the endless variety of possibili- 
 ties, while the reality lasts but a short time. Hence 
 the feeling of disappointment ensues. Hope imme- 
 diately rallies the powers. We turn to new plans, 
 and begin again the round of anticipation, ending in 
 disappointments. 
 
 Happiness is much like to-morrow — only one day 
 from us, yet never arriving. It is, in a word, hope 
 or anticipation. In this life we pursue it; in the 
 
HAPPINESS. 489 
 
 future life we hope to overtake it. It is the experi- 
 ence of all that, having realized our hopes, of what- 
 ever nature they may be, we are not satisfied. And 
 it is well for man that he is so constituted, since 
 satisfaction would be a bar to future efforts. We at 
 once form new plans, grander and more comprehen- 
 sive in their scope ; we renew the struggle, press 
 forward to their accomplishment, finding pleasure 
 in the pursuit, if 'not in the possession^ Perhaps 
 nothing more plainly shows the diversity of the 
 human mind than the different methods employed 
 in this pursuit. Some seek it in the acquisition of 
 wealth; others, of power; others, of fame. Some, 
 by plunging into society, endeavor, by a giddy round 
 of pleasure, to catch the same evanescent shadow 
 that others seek by a life of solitude. No class or 
 race of people exist but that have some characteristic 
 mode in which they trust to secure happiness. The 
 savage seeks it in hunting and fishing, in barbarous 
 warfare, or in the rude war dance. National pecul- 
 iarities are strongly shown in their ideas of what 
 constitutes happiness ; the light-hearted nations of the 
 sunny south differing in this respect from their more 
 serious northern neighbors. To be happy is the 
 summing up of all the ends and aims on earth. It 
 is a noble desire, implanted in the human breast by 
 the Creator for purposes known only to his wisdom. 
 We talk of wealth, fame, and power as undeniable 
 sources of enjoyment ; and limited fortune; obscurity, 
 and insignificance as incompatible with felicity. This 
 is an instance of the remarkable distinction between 
 
490 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 theoretic conclusions and experience. However brill- 
 iant in speculation wealth, fame, and power are found 
 in possession impotent to confer happiness. How- 
 ever decried in prospect limited fortune, obscurity, 
 and insignificance are, by experience, found most 
 friendly to real and lasting pleasure. It is not this 
 or that or the other peculiar mode of life, nor in any 
 particulars of outward circumstances, nor in any def- 
 inite kind of labor or duty, that we may positively 
 expect happiness. If we do we shall be disappointed, 
 for it is not in our power to have things just our 
 way, or to control our outward life just as we would. 
 
 We live amid a multitude of influences we can 
 not altogether control. Nor is it best we should. 
 We must seek* happiness in the right state of mind, 
 in the legitimate labors, duties, and pleasures of life, 
 and then we shall find what we seek, yet we may 
 find it under very different circumstances from what 
 we expected. It is much more equally divided than 
 some of us imagine. One man may possess most of 
 the materials, but little of the thing; another may 
 possess much of the thing, but few of the materials. 
 In this particular view happiness has been compared 
 to the manna in the desert — "he that gathered much 
 had nothing over, and he that gathered little had no 
 lack." Therefore, to diminish envy, let us consider 
 not what others possess, but what they enjoy. 
 
 We may look for happiness in one direction, but 
 find it in another, and sometimes where we expect 
 the least we may find the most, and where we look 
 for the most we shall find the least. We are short- 
 
HAPPINESS. 491 
 
 sighted, and fail to see the ends of things. A great 
 deal of the misery of life comes from this disposition 
 to have things our own way, as though we could not 
 be happy under any circumstances except those we 
 have framed to meet our own wants. Circumstances 
 are not half so essential to our happiness as most 
 people imagine. A cabin is often the seat of more 
 true happiness than a palace. Kings may bid higher 
 for happiness than their subjects, but it is more apt 
 to fall to the lot of the private citizen than the mon- 
 arch. She sends to the palace her equipage, her 
 pomp, and her train, but she herself is traveling 
 incognita to keep a private appointment with con- 
 tentment, and to partake of a dinner of herbs in a 
 cottage. 
 
 The disposition to make the best of life is what we 
 want to make us happy. Those who are so willful 
 and seemingly perverse about their outward circum- 
 stances are often intensely affected by the merest tri- 
 fles. A little thing shadows their life for days. The 
 want of some convenience, some personal gratification, 
 some outward form or ornament will blight a day's joy. 
 They can often bear a great calamity better than a 
 small disappointment, because they nerve themselves 
 to meet the former, and yield to the latter without an 
 effort to resist. Molehills are magnified into mount- 
 ains, and in the shadow of these mountains they sit 
 down and weep. The very things they ought to have 
 sometimes come unasked, and because they are not 
 ready for them they will not enjoy them, but rather 
 make them the cause of misery. There is also a 
 
492 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 disposition in such minds to multiply their troubles as 
 well as magnify them. They make troubles of many 
 things which should really be regarded as privileges, 
 opportunities for self-sacrifice, for culture, for improv- 
 ing effort. They make troubles of the ordinary allot- 
 ments of life ; its duties, charities, changes, unavoid- 
 able accidents, reverses, and experiences. This can 
 be considered in no other light than morally wrong, 
 for these common allotments and experiences were, 
 beyond all question, ordained by infinite wisdom as a 
 healthy discipline for the soul of man. 
 
 Some spend life determined to be vastly happy at 
 some future time, but for the present put off all en- 
 joyment even of passing pleasures, seemingly for fear 
 lest all such present comfort detracts from the sum 
 total of future enjoyments. They, indeed, acquire 
 wealth or fame or the outward surroundings of happi- 
 ness ; but, alas ! too often the palmy days of life are 
 gone, and the acquisitions from which they fondly 
 hoped to gather much of human happiness form 
 but the stately surroundings of real and heart-felt 
 wretchedness. Happiness, then, should be as a 
 modest mansion, which we can inhabit while we have 
 our health and vigor to enjoy it; not a labric so vast 
 and expensive that it has cost us the best part of our 
 lives to build it, and which we can enjoy only when 
 we have less occasion for a habitation than for 
 a tomb. 
 
 Happiness is a mosaic composed of many small 
 stones. Each taken apart and viewed singly may be 
 of little value ; but when all are grouped together, 
 
HAPPINESS. 493 
 
 judiciously combined, and set they form a pleasing 
 and graceful whole, a costly jewel. Trample not 
 under foot, then, the little pleasures which a gracious 
 Providence scatters in the daily path while in search 
 after some great and exciting joy. Happiness, after 
 all, is a state of the mind. It can not consist in 
 things. It follows thence that in the right discipline 
 of the mind is the secret of true happiness. In vain 
 do they talk of happiness who never subdued an 
 impulse in obedience to a principle. He who never 
 sacrificed a present to a future good, or a personal to 
 a general one, can speak of happiness only as the 
 blind do of colors. 
 
 The fountain of content must spring up in the 
 mind, and he who seeks happiness by changing any 
 thing but his own disposition will waste his life in 
 fruitless efforts, and multiply the griefs which he 
 seeks to remove. The trouble often is, we are too 
 selfish, too unvieldinor in our arrangements for life's 
 best good. Because we can not find happiness in 
 our own way we will not accept it in its appointed 
 way, and so make ourselves miserable. Some excel- 
 lent people are very unhappy from a kind of stubborn 
 adherence to their settled convictions of just what 
 they must have and what they must do to be happy. 
 They lose sight of the fact that God rules above 
 them, and a thousand influences work around them, 
 partly, at least, beyond their control. They have not 
 determined to accept life cheerfully in whatever form 
 it may come, and seek for good under all circum- 
 stances. 
 
494 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 We must seek for happiness in heaven -ap- 
 pointed ways, in study, duty, labor, exalted pleas- 
 ures, with a constant effort to find it. We must 
 seek it in domestic and business life, in the relations 
 we hold to our fellow-men, and in the daily oppor- 
 tunities afforded us for discipline and self-sacrifice. 
 If, then, you would be happy, possessing at least 
 that measure of happiness which is vouchsafed to 
 mortals, we must intelligently seek happiness, not by 
 way of impulse, not seeking selfishly our own good, 
 but with a forgetfulness of self doing all the good we 
 can, and with a thorough consecration of soul to the 
 good of what we seek. 
 
 "Greatness, thou gaudy torment of our souls, 
 The wise man's fetters, and the rage of fools." 
 
 |HERE is so much in this world that is artificial, 
 so much that glitters in borrowed light, that it 
 
 jj is not singular that moral greatness and nobility 
 are often counterfeited by some baser metal — 
 so much so that it is no slight task to discriminate 
 rightly between the true and the false, and to deter- 
 mine wherein true nobility doth consist. When we 
 carefully consider the nature of man we readily admit 
 that it is in the possession of moral and intellectual 
 powers that his superiority over the brute world 
 consists. 
 
TR UE NOBILITY. 495 
 
 In the society of his fellow-men man ought not to 
 be rated by his possessions, by his stores of gold, by 
 his office of honor or trust ; these are but temporary 
 and accidental advantages, and the next turn of for- 
 tune may tear them from his grasp. The light of 
 fame, though it shines with ever so clear a light, is 
 able to dispel the darkness of death but a little ways. 
 The greatest characters of antiquity are but little 
 known. Curiosity follows them in vain, for the veil 
 of oblivion successfully hides the greater portion of 
 their lives. 
 
 The world ofttimes knows nothing of its greatest 
 men. Their lives were passed in obscurity, but real 
 nobility of character was theirs, and this is nearly 
 always unseen and unknown. He who in tattered 
 garments toils on the way may, and often does, pos- 
 sess more real nobility of spirit than he who is driven 
 past in a chariot. It is the mind that makes the 
 heart rich ; and as the sun breaks through the dark- 
 est clouds, so honor peereth in the meanest habit. 
 Public martyrdom of every shade has a certain eclat 
 and popularity connected with it that will often bear 
 men up to endure its trials with courage ; but those 
 who suffer alone, without sympathy, for truth or 
 principle — those who, unnoticed by men, maintain 
 their part, and, in obscurity and amid discourage- 
 ment, patiently fulfill their trust — these are the real 
 heroes of the age, and the suffering they bear is real 
 greatness. 
 
 It is refreshing to read the account of some of 
 the truly great men and women, whose lives of use- 
 
496 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 fulness have done much for the alleviation of the 
 world's misery. And, after all, there is no true no- 
 bility except as it displays itself in good deeds. Says 
 Matthew Henry: " Nothing can make a man truly 
 great but being truly good, and partaking of God's 
 holiness." That which constitutes human goodness, 
 human greatness, and human nobleness is not the 
 degree of enlightenment with which men pursue their 
 own advantages, but it is self-forgetfulness, self-sac- 
 rifice, and the disregard of personal advantages, 
 remote or contingent, because some other line of 
 conduct is nearer right. The greatest man is he 
 who chooses right with the most invincible resolu- 
 tion ; who resists the sorest temptations from within 
 and without; who bears the heaviest burdens cheer- 
 fully ; who is calmest in storms, and most fearless 
 under menaces and frowns. 
 
 Some persons are great only in their ability to do 
 evil. Such appears to have constituted the greatness 
 of many of those individuals who drenched the world 
 in blood that their ambition might be satisfied. They 
 may possess the most astonishing mental qualities, 
 yet may be overruled for evil instead of good. Men 
 of the most brilliant qualities need only a due admix- 
 ture of pride, ambition, and selfishness to be great 
 only in evil ways. Energy without integrity of char- 
 acter and a soul of goodness may only represent the 
 embodied principle of evil. But when the elements 
 of character are brought into action by a determinate 
 will, and influenced by high purposes, man enters 
 upon, and courageously perseveres in, the path of 
 
TE UE NOBILITY. 497 
 
 duty at whatever cost of worldly interests, he may 
 be said to approach the summit of his being — to 
 possess true nobility of character ; he is the embodi- 
 ment of the highest idea of manliness. 
 
 The life of such a man becomes repeated in the 
 life and actions of others. He is just and upright 
 in his business dealings, in his public actions, and in 
 his family life. He will be honest in all things — in 
 his works and in his words. He will be generous 
 and merciful to his opponent — to those who are 
 weaker as well as those stronger than himself. "The 
 man oi noble spirit converts all occurrences into ex- 
 perience, between which experience and his reason 
 there is marriage, and the issue are his actions. He 
 moves by affection, not for affection ; he loves glory, 
 scorns shame, and governeth and obeyeth with one 
 countenance, for it comes from one consideration. 
 Knowing reason to be no idle gift of nature he is 
 the steersman of his own destiny. Truth is his 
 goddess, and he takes pains to get her, not to look 
 like her. Unto the society of men he is a sun whose 
 clearness directs in a regular motion. He is the wise 
 man's friend, the example of the indifferent, the med- 
 icine of the vicious. Thus time goeth not from him, 
 but with him, and he feels age more by the strength 
 of his soul than by the weakness of his body. Thus 
 feels he no pain, but esteems all such things as 
 friends that desire to file off his fetters and help 
 him out of prison." 
 
 True nobility of spirit is always modest in expres- 
 sion. The grace of an action is gone as soon as we 
 
 32 
 
498 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 are convinced that it was done only that third per- 
 sons might applaud the act. But he who is truly 
 great, and does good because it is his duty, is not at 
 all anxious that others should witness his acts. His 
 aim is to do good because it is right. His nobility 
 does not show itself in waiting and watching for some 
 chance to do a great good at once. Greatness can 
 only be rightly estimated when minuteness is justly 
 reverenced. Greatness is the aggregation of minute- 
 ness ; nor can its sublimity be felt truthfully by any 
 mind unaccustomed to the watching of what is least. 
 His nobility consists in being great in little things. 
 All the little details of life are attended to, and thus 
 the soul is prepared for great ones. There is more 
 true nobility in duty faithfully done than in any one 
 great act when others are looking on and signifying 
 their approval, and thus by their sympathy spurring 
 the soul on to greater exertions. 
 
 It is impossible to conceive of a truly great char- 
 acter, and not think of one imbued with the spirit 
 of kindness. Nobility of spirit will not dwell with 
 the haughty in manner. It delights to take up its 
 abode with the generous and tender-hearted, those 
 who seek to relieve the misery of others as they 
 would their own. If you contrast the career of Na- 
 poleon Bonaparte and Florence Nightingale, though 
 one filled all Europe with the terror of his name, 
 doubt not that in the scale of moral greatness the 
 latter far outweighs the former. Kindness is the 
 most powerful instrument in the world to move men's 
 hearts, and a word in kindness spoken will often 
 
TR VE NOBILITY, 499 
 
 do more for the furtherance of your cause than any 
 amount of angry reasoning. Therefore, it is not 
 singular that one whose whole life is spent in the 
 exercise of kindness should possess a peculiar power 
 over the lives of others — in effect, wield such an in- 
 fluence over them as marks him as one of the truly 
 great. 
 
 Nobility of character is also reverential. The 
 possession of this quality marks the noblest and 
 highest type of manhood and womanhood. Rever- 
 ence for things consecrated by the homage of gener- 
 ations, for high objects, pure thoughts, and noble 
 aims, for the great men of former times and the 
 high-minded workers among our contemporaries. 
 Reverence is alike indispensable to the happiness 
 of individuals, of families, and of nations. Without 
 it there can be no trust, no faith, no confidence, 
 either in God or man — neither social peace nor social 
 progress. Reverence is but another name for love, 
 which binds men to each other, and all to God. 
 
 The rewards of a life of moral greatness rests 
 with posterity. Great men are like the oaks, under 
 the branches of which men are happy in finding a 
 refuge in times of storm and rain. But when the 
 danger is past they take pleasure in cutting the bark 
 and breaking the branches. As long as human 
 nature is such a mass of contradictions this is not to 
 be wondered at. But the influence of such men is 
 ever working, and will sooner or later show itself. 
 Men such as these are the true life-blood of the 
 country to which they belong. They elevate and 
 
500 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 uphold it, fortify and ennoble it, and shed a glory 
 over it by the example of life and character which 
 they have bequeathed to it. " The names and man- 
 ners of great men," says an able writer, " are the 
 dowry of a nation." Whenever national life begins to 
 quicken, the dead heroes rise in the memory of men. 
 These men of noble principles are the salt of the 
 earth. In death, as well as life, their example lives 
 in their country, a stimulus and encouragement to all 
 who have the soul to adopt it. 
 
 Nobility of character is within the reach of all. 
 It is the result of patient endeavors after a life of 
 goodness, and, when acquired, can not be swept 
 away unless by the consent of its possessor. Wealth 
 may be lost by no fault of its possessor, but great- 
 ness of soul is an abiding quality. One may fail in 
 his other aims ; the many accidents of life may bring 
 to naught his most patient endeavors after worldly 
 fame or success ; but he who strives for nobility of 
 character will not fail of reward, if he but diligently 
 seek the same by earnest resolve and patient labor. 
 Is there not in this a lesson of patience for many 
 who are almost weary of striving for better things ? 
 If success does not crown their ambitious efforts, will 
 they not be sustained by the smile of an approving 
 conscience ? Strong in this, they can wait with pa- 
 tience till, in the fullness of time, their reward cometh. 
 
A GOOD NAME. 501 
 
 " He that filches from me my good name 
 
 Robs me of that which ne'er enriches him, 
 
 And makes me poor indeed." 
 
 Shakespeare. 
 
 Spl GOOD name is the richest possession we have 
 4g£pb while living, and the best legacy we leave be- 
 ¥"• hind us when dead. It survives when we are 
 no more; it endures when our bodies and the 
 marbles which cover them have crumbled into dust. 
 How can we obtain it ? What means will secure it 
 to us with the free consent of mankind and the ac- 
 knowledged suffrages of the world ? It is won by 
 virtue, by skill, by industry, by patience and perse- 
 verance, and by humble and consistent trust and 
 confidence in a high and overruling power. It is 
 lost by folly, by ignorance, by ignominy and crime, 
 by excessive ambition and avarice. 
 
 That good name, which is to be chosen rather 
 than great riches, does not depend on the variable 
 and shifting wind of popular opinion. It is based on 
 permanent excellence, and is as immutable as virtue 
 and truth. It consists in a fair and unsullied reputa- 
 tion — a reputation formed under the influence of vir- 
 tuous principles, and awarded to us, not by the 
 ignorant and the vicious, but by the intelligent and 
 the good. 
 
 In such a name we look first of all for integrity, 
 or an unbending regard to rectitude; we look for 
 
502 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 independence, or a determination to be governed by 
 an enlightened consideration of truth and duty ; for 
 benevolence or a spirit of kindness and good-will 
 toward men ; and, finally, for a reverent regard for 
 all moral qualities. These are the essential proper- 
 ties of a good character, the living, breathing linea- 
 ments of that good name which commends itself to 
 the careful consideration of the truly good every-where. 
 It is ever to be kept in mind that a good name is 
 in all cases the fruit of personal exertions. It is not 
 inherited from parents; it is not created by external 
 advantages. It is no necessary appendage of birth 
 or wealth or talents or station, but the result of one's 
 own endeavors, the fruit and reward of good princi- 
 ples manifested in a course of virtuous and honorable 
 actions. Hence the attainment of a good name, 
 however humble the station, is within the reach of 
 all. No young man is excluded from this invaluable 
 boon. He has only to fix his eye on the prize, and 
 to press toward it in a course of virtuous and useful 
 conduct, and it is his. It may be said that in the 
 formation of a good name personal exertion is the first, 
 the second, and the last virtue. Nothing great or 
 excellent can be acquired without it. All the virtues 
 of which it is composed are the result of untiring 
 application and industry. Nothing can be more fatal 
 to the attainment of a good character than a confi- 
 dence in external advantages. These, if not seconded 
 by your own endeavors, will drop you midway, or 
 perhaps you will not have started when the diligent 
 traveler will have won the race. 
 
A GOOD NAME. 503 
 
 Life will inevitably take much of its shape and 
 coloring from the plastic powers that operate in 
 youth. Much will depend on taking a proper course 
 at the outset of life. The principles then adopted 
 and the habits then formed, whether good or bad, 
 become a kind of second nature, fixed and perma- 
 nent. The most critical period of life is that which 
 elapses from fourteen to twenty-one years of age. 
 More is done during this period to mold and settle 
 the character of the future man than in all the other 
 years of life. If a young man passes this period 
 with pure morals and a fair reputation, a good name 
 is almost sure to crown his years and to descend 
 with him to the close of his days. On the other 
 hand, if a young man in the Spring season of life 
 neglects his mind and heart, if he indulges himself 
 in vicious courses, and forms habits of inefficiency and 
 slothfulness, he inflicts an injury on his good name 
 which time will not efface, and brings a stain upon 
 his character which no tears can wash away. 
 
 The two most precious things this side the grave 
 are our reputation and our life. But it is to be 
 lamented that the most contemptible whisper may 
 deprive us of the one and the weakest weapon of 
 the other. A wise man, therefore, will be more 
 anxious to deserve a fair reputation than to possess 
 it; and this will teach him so to live as not to be 
 afraid to die. A fair reputation, it should be remem- 
 bered, is a plant delicate in its growth. It will not 
 shoot up in a night, like the gourd that sheltered the 
 prophet's head; but, like that gourd, it may perish 
 
504 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 in a night. A name which it has cost many years to 
 establish is often destroyed in a single hour. A good 
 name, like good-will, is gained by many actions, but 
 lost by one. 
 
 One of the most essential elements of a good 
 name is the possession of good moral principles. 
 Such principles fill the soul with the noblest views 
 and the purest sentiments, and direct all the ener- 
 gies, desires, and purposes to their proper use and 
 end. Such principles impart new light and vigor to 
 the mind, and secure to its possessor a safe passage 
 through all the temptations of the world to the abodes 
 of eternal purity and blessedness. A character with- 
 out fixed moral principles has impressed on it the 
 deformity of a great and palpable defect. Whatever 
 virtues it does not possess are like flowers planted in 
 the snow or withered by the drought — wanting the 
 life vigor and beauty which principles alone can im- 
 part. Lacking such principles one would in vain seek 
 to acquire a good name. As well expect a vessel to 
 traverse broad oceans to a destined harbor with no 
 rudder whereby to control its course. 
 
 Though a good name is won only by a life of 
 constant activity and exertion, by self-denial, and an 
 outflow of charity, yet its rewards are great and 
 enduring, and to fail of its possession is to be with- 
 out the best thing on earth. Without it gold has no 
 value, birth no distinction, station no dignity, beauty 
 no charms, age no reverence. Without it every 
 treasure impoverishes, every grace deforms, every 
 dignity degrades, and all the arts, the decorations, 
 
A GOOD NAME. 505 
 
 and accomplishments of life stand like the beacon 
 blaze upon a rock, warning that its approach is dan- 
 gerous, that its contact is death. He who has it 
 not is under eternal quarantine — no friend to greet 
 him, no home to harbor him. And in the midst of 
 all that ambition can achieve, or avarice amass, or 
 rapacity plunder, he feels himself alone, destitute of 
 the sympathy of others. 
 
 A good character is a sure protection against 
 suspicion and evil reports. A man of bad or doubt- 
 ful character is suspected of a thousand acts of which 
 he may not be guilty. And if he does a good deed 
 it is apt to be ascribed to a bad motive. He has 
 lost the confidence of his fellow-men. They know 
 him to be unprincipled and hollow-hearted, and are 
 therefore ready to believe all the evil that is thought 
 or said of him, but none of the good. On the other 
 hand, a man of fair character, of tried and established 
 reputation, stands out to the eyes of the public as 
 one who is above suspicion, and above reproach. 
 The envious may attempt to tarnish his fair name, 
 but their efforts recoil upon their own heads. He is 
 conscious of acting from correct principles, and being 
 known to the public as a man of integrity and worth 
 he need never give himself much concern as to any 
 unfavorable reports that may be circulated respecting 
 him. They acquit him without trial, and believe his 
 innocence without the judgment of a court. Slander 
 may, indeed, for a moment, fix its fangs on a spot- 
 less character, but such a character has within it- 
 self an antidote to the poison, and emerges from 
 
506 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 the temporary shadow with invigorated strength and 
 heightened beauty. 
 
 While a good name will secure for you the esteem 
 and confidence of your fellow-men, how will it increase 
 your capacity and extend the sphere of your useful- 
 ness ! Who are the men whose friendship is most 
 highly valued, whose opinions have greatest weight, 
 whose patronage is most eagerly sought, and whose 
 influence is most extensively sought in the country? 
 Are they not men of principle — men of known worth 
 and established reputation? A good name draws 
 round its possessor warm friends, and opens for him a 
 sure and easy way to wealth, to honor, and happiness. 
 Reverse the picture, and think of the direful evils of 
 a ruined character. It will expose you to a thousand 
 painful suspicions and blasting reports ; it will deprive 
 you of all self-respect and peace of mind ; it will ex- 
 clude you from the confidence and esteem of your 
 fellow-men, and bring upon you their neglect and 
 contempt ; it will cut you off from all means of use- 
 fulness, and degrade you to a mere cipher in society, 
 rendering your ultimate success impossible. 
 
 A good name is thus a protection against suspi- 
 cion and evil reports ; it is the source of the purest 
 and most lasting enjoyment ; it secures for us the 
 esteem and confidence of our fellow-men ; it increases 
 the power and enlarges the sphere of our usefulness ; 
 it has the most direct and happy bearing on our suc- 
 cess in life ; it stands connected with the happiness of 
 our families and friends, with the welfare of society, 
 with the temporal and eternal happiness of thousands. 
 
MEDITATION. 507 
 
 
 ^^KeDITATION is the soul's perspective glass, 
 ^Sjb whereby, in her long removes, she discerns 
 w* God as if he were near at hand. It is think- 
 ing, not growth, that makes the perfect man 
 or woman. Hence life may be said to have com- 
 menced when the mind learns to meditate upon its 
 nature, its powers, and its possibilities. This is the 
 commencement of true soul-growth. To live without 
 thought is not life ; it is simple, barren existence. 
 There is in youth a natural impulsiveness which is 
 highly detrimental to their best interests. In itself 
 this is not wrong ; but personal usefulness depends 
 upon its being controlled and brought into subjection 
 to the judgment. 
 
 The first and hardest lesson of life to learn is to 
 subdue and chasten the inborn impulses of the soul. 
 His soaring ambition, his reckless hopes, his daring 
 courage must be held in check by the rein of sober 
 sense. The curb and bit must be put on and drawn 
 tightly, and this must be done by his own hand. In 
 his hours of meditation he must form his plans, lay 
 out his work, breathe his prayer for victory, and 
 swear eternal fealty to his purpose of right. In the 
 still chambers of thought he must rally his moral 
 forces, pledge them to duty, and call aid from above 
 in his solemn work. Others may assist him by en- 
 couragement, by advice and solemn warning ; but the 
 
508 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 work is his own. If he has learned to think, he has 
 within an element of safety found nowhere else. 
 
 What can be more distasteful than the actions 
 of impulsive people? To-day they are borne on the 
 gale of the wildest pleasure — they are more giddy 
 than the feather tossed in the breeze ; to-morrow, in 
 darkness of spirit, despairing and wretched, because 
 their hot-brained fancies failed to give them peace 
 and joy. To-day they thoughtlessly act as their im- 
 pulses lead them ; to-morrow they are full of regrets 
 about the mistakes and blunders of yesterday. They 
 give full vent to whatever impulsive feeling happens 
 to come uppermost, changing more often than the 
 wind, and reflecting as little upon their variations. 
 It is the office of meditation to train and subdue 
 these impulses. 
 
 The fault is not in the joyousness of spirit which 
 accompanies youthful action, but in the impulsiveness 
 with which, they are indulged. The feelings come 
 forth as masters, whereas they should be servants, 
 subdued, but joyous. They should be submissive 
 and obedient children of the will, doing its dictates 
 with alacrity and power. They should make the 
 intellect more active, the affections more warm and 
 deep, and the moral sense more varied and strong. 
 The fruit of meditation is propriety of action. There 
 is a simple and beautiful propriety, pleasing to all, 
 which gives grace to the manners and loveliness to 
 the whole being, which all should strive to possess. 
 It is neither too grave nor too gay, too gleesome nor 
 too sad, nor either of these at improper places. It 
 
MEDITATION. 509 
 
 is to be mirthful without being silly, joyous without 
 being foolish, sober without being despondent, to 
 speak plainly without giving offense, grave without 
 casting a shadow over others. 
 
 Meditation should sit on the throne of the mind 
 as the counselor of the mental powers ; and thus, by 
 early habits of obedience, even the passions will be- 
 come powers of noble import, contributing an energy 
 and determination that will wrest victory out of every 
 conflict and success out of every struggle. To secure 
 this blessing, one must early learn to hold counsel 
 within himself over every desire and impulse that 
 rises within him, over every action of the soul, and 
 see that at all times obedience is yielded to the dic- 
 tates of this counsel. To be successful in this he 
 must be always watchful, always guarded, always 
 striving for the more perfect attainment of the great 
 object before him. 
 
 He who can not command his thoughts must not 
 hope to control his actions. All mental superiority 
 originates in habits of thought. Take away thought 
 from the life of a man and what remains ? You may 
 glean knowledge by reading, but you must separate 
 the chaff from the wheat by thinking. The value of 
 our thoughts depend much upon the course they take, 
 whether the subject in hand be examined fully and 
 carefully, or only given an undecided glance, whence 
 our thoughts revert to other matters to be treated in 
 the same desultory way. Many minds from want of 
 training can not really think. It is of great impor- 
 tance that right habits of thought be formed and 
 
510 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 fostered in early life. A person may see, hear, read, 
 and learn whatever he pleases ; but he will know very 
 little beyond that which he has thought over and 
 made the property of his mind. 
 
 Become master of your thoughts so that you can 
 command them at your pleasure. Whenever you 
 read have your thoughts about you. Make careful 
 observations as you pass along, and select subjects 
 upon which your thoughts shall dwell when your 
 book shall have been laid aside. He who reads 
 only for present gratification, and neglects to digest 
 what he reads, nor calls it up for future contempla- 
 tion, will not be likely to ever know the extent of 
 his own powers, for the best test calculated to make 
 them known will remain unemployed. Consider the 
 great field which is open before you. Into which- 
 ever department you take your way, you will be 
 amazed at the magnitude and grandeur of the objects 
 by which you are surrounded, and your mind will be 
 filled with the most exalted conceptions of the good- 
 ness, wisdom, and power of the Creator. 
 
 We can not guard too much against indulgence 
 in thoughts, which, trivial as they may at first appear, 
 would give a cast to our whole character should they 
 become settled habits. Impure thoughts are seeds 
 of sin. If dropped into the soil of the mind, they 
 should be cast out immediately ; otherwise they will 
 germinate, spring up, and bear fruits of sinful words 
 and acts. Few consider the power and magnitude 
 of thought. Man is not as he seems, nor as he acts, 
 but as he thinks. It is the thoughts of a man, and 
 
MEDITATION. 511 
 
 not his deeds, that are the true exponent of his char- 
 acter. Deeds make reputation, thought makes char- 
 acter. Deeds are the paper currency of thought 
 stamped in the mint of purity. Thoughts surpass 
 deeds in power and grandeur in the same ratio as 
 character surpasses reputation. 
 
 Many lives are wrecked through thoughtlessness 
 alone. If you find yourself in low company do not 
 sit carelessly by till you are gradually drawn into the 
 whirlpool, but think of the consequences of such a 
 course. Rational thought will lead you to seek the so- 
 ciety of your superiors, and you must improve by the 
 association. A benevolent use of your example and 
 influence for the elevation of the fallen is a noble 
 thing. Even the most depraved are not beyond such 
 help. But the young man of impressible character 
 must at least think and beware lest he fall himself a 
 victim. Think before you touch the wine cup. Re- 
 member its effects upon thousands, and know that 
 you are no stronger than they were in their youth. 
 Think before you allow angry passions to overcome 
 your reason. It is thus that murder is wrought. 
 Think before, in a dark hour of temptation, you 
 allow yourself to drift into crime. Think well ere a 
 lie or an oath passes your lips, for a man of pure 
 speech only can merit respect. Think of things pure 
 and lovely and of good report; think of God and of 
 heaven, of life and duty, and your thoughts being 
 thus elevating and inspiring, your life will be full of 
 good deeds and pleasant memories. 
 
512 GOLDEN OEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 KlUR principles are the springs of our actions ; 
 our actions, the springs of our happiness or 
 misery. Too much care, therefore, can not be 
 taken in forming our principles. Men of gen- 
 uine excellence in every station of life — men of 
 industry, of integrity, of high principles, of sterling 
 honesty of purpose — command the spontaneous hom- 
 age of mankind. It is natural to believe in such 
 men, to have confidence in them, and to imitate 
 them. All that is good in the world is upheld by 
 them, and without their presence in it, the world 
 would scarcely be worth the living in. 
 
 That young man is sure to become a worthless 
 character and a pernicious member of society, who 
 is loose in his principles and habits, who lives without 
 plan and without object, spending his time in idleness 
 and pleasure. He forgets his high destination as a 
 rational, immortal being; he degrades himself to a 
 level with the brute, and is not only disqualified for 
 all the serious duties of life, but proves himself a 
 nuisance and a curse to all with whom he is con- 
 nected. Every unprincipled man is an enemy to so- 
 ciety, and richly merits its condemnation. They are 
 not respected, they are not patronized ; confidence 
 and support are withheld from them, and they are 
 left, neglected and despised, to float down the stream 
 of life. 
 
 No young man can hope to rise in society, or act 
 
PRINCIPLES. 51 
 
 worthily his part in life, without a fair moral char- 
 acter. The basis of such a character is virtuous 
 principles, or a deep, fixed sense oi moral obligation. 
 The man who possesses such character can be 
 trusted. Integrity and justice are to him words of 
 meaning, and he aims to exemplify the virtues they 
 express in his outward life. Such a man has decision 
 of character ; he knows what is right, and is firm in 
 doing it. He has independence of character ; he 
 thinks and acts for himself, and is not to be made a 
 tool to serve the purpose of party. He has consist- 
 ency oi purpose, pursuing a straightforward course ; 
 and what he is to-day he will be to-morrow. Such a 
 man has true worth oi character, and his life is a 
 blessing to himself, to his family, to society, and to 
 the world. To have a character founded on orood 
 principles is the first and indispensable qualification 
 of a good citizen. It imparts life and strength and 
 beauty not only to individual character, but to all 
 social institutions. It is, indeed, the dew and the 
 rain that nourish the vine and the fi^-tree bv which 
 we are shaded and refreshed. 
 
 Deportment, honesty, caution, and a desire to do 
 right, carried out in practice, are to human character 
 what truth, reverence, and love are to religion. Thev 
 are the constant elements of a good character. Let 
 the vulgar and the degraded scott at such virtues 
 if they will, a strict, upright, onward course will 
 evince to the world that there is more manly inde- 
 pendence in one forgiving smile than in all their fi 
 
 tious rules of honor. Virtue must have its admirers, 
 
 33 
 
514 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 and firmness of principle, both moral and religious, 
 will ever command the proudest encomiums of the 
 intelligent world. The auspicious bearing of such 
 principles on the formation of your character and on 
 your best interests can not be too highly estimated. 
 These are the mainspring of purpose and action. 
 Their formation can not be begun too early in life, 
 since they will remain with you as long as you live, 
 and exert a decisive influence on your condition of 
 success or failure. 
 
 There is no brighter jewel in any young man's 
 character than to be firmly established on principles 
 of unyielding rectitude. They change not with times 
 and circumstances. They are the same yesterday, 
 to-day, and forever. They extend their sway to all 
 beings and to all classes, to the man of learning and 
 the ignorant peasant, to the beggar and the prince ; 
 they are the bond of union and the source of blessed- 
 ness to all subjects of God's empire. It is always 
 easy to know what is right, but often difficult to 
 decide what is best for our present interests or pop- 
 ularity. He who acts from false principles is often 
 perplexed in deciding on any plan of action. He 
 knows hot what course to pursue, or how to avoid 
 the difficulties that are ever thickening around him. 
 His way is dark and crooked, and full of snares and 
 pitfalls. But the way is light as day to him whose 
 ruling principle is duty. He is not perplexed as to 
 questions of interest or popularity. 
 
 Such a man, whether rich or poor, has those solid 
 and excellent traits of character which are certain to 
 
PRINCIPLES. 515 
 
 secure for him the esteem and confidence of all good 
 men ; and even those who are too weak to imitate his 
 virtues are obliged to yield to him the secret homage 
 of their respect. But the greatest boon of all is the 
 self-respect he thus secures. He is not degraded in 
 his own eyes by acting from unworthy and criminal 
 motives. And it is only when once lost that you fully 
 realize how valuable is this boon of self-respect. It 
 is the fruit of exertion in right ways. 
 
 There are false principles, to embrace which is 
 certain defeat to hopes of future usefulness. There 
 are some who make pleasure the aim of their lives, 
 and who seem to live only for their own enjoyment. 
 Man was made for action, for duty, and usefulness ; 
 and it is only when he lives in accordance with this 
 great design of his being that he attains his highest 
 dignity and truest happiness. To make pleasure his 
 ultimate aim is certainly to fail of it. No matter 
 what a young man's situation and prospects are — no 
 matter if he is perfectly independent in his circum- 
 stances and heir to millions — he will certainly be- 
 come a worthless character if he does not aim at 
 something higher than his own selfish enjoyment. A 
 life thus spent is a life lost. It is utterly inconsistent 
 with all manliness of thought and action. It forms 
 a character of effeminacy and feebleness, and entails 
 on its possessor, not only the contempt of all worthy 
 and good men, but embitters the decline of life with 
 shame and self-reproach. 
 
 Another principle of evil import is the love of 
 money, which exerts a mighty and powerful influence 
 
516 GOLDEN OEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 over the children of men. When once the love of 
 money becomes in any man a dominant principle of 
 action there is an end of all hope of his ever attain- 
 ing the true excellence of an intelligent moral being. 
 Money is the supreme and governing motive of his 
 conduct, and, where this is the case, it is not to be 
 expected that a man will be very scrupulous as to 
 the means of obtaining it. Put a piece of gold too 
 close to the eye and it is large enough to blind you 
 to home, to love, to death, and to heaven itself. 
 
 There is a tide in the affairs of men, 
 
 Which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune; 
 
 Omitted, all the voyage of their life 
 
 Is bound in shallows and in miseries." 
 
 — Shakespeare. 
 
 1|||||ANY fail in life from the want, as they are too 
 ready to suppose, of those great occasions 
 wherein they might have shown their trust- 
 worthiness and their integrity. But in order 
 to find whether a vessel be leaky we first prove it 
 with water before we trust it with wine. The more 
 minute and trivial opportunities of being just and 
 upright are constantly occurring to every one. It is 
 the proper employment of these smaller opportunities 
 that occasion the great ones. It is one of the com- 
 mon mistakes of life, and one of the most radical 
 
OPPORTUNITY. 517 
 
 sources of evil, to wait for opportunities. Many per- 
 sons are looking for some marked event or some 
 grand opening through which they hope to develop 
 what may be in them, and thus make potent a char- 
 acter which now, for lack of motives, is barren and 
 unfruitful. 
 
 The real materials out of which our characters are 
 forming are the hourly occurrences of every-day life. 
 Every claim of duty, the employment of each minute, 
 the daily vexations or trials we are called upon to 
 bear, the momentary decisions that must be made, 
 the casual interview, the contact with sin or sorrow 
 in every-day dress — all, these and many others as 
 small and as constant, are the real opportunities of 
 life. These we are continually embracing or neg- 
 lecting, and out of them we are forming a character 
 that is fast consolidating into the shape we gave it 
 for good or for evil. If we watch through a single 
 day we shall doubtless discover hundreds of oppor- 
 tunities of both doing and receiving good that we 
 have, perhaps, hitherto passed by with indifference, 
 and by diligent assiduity in seeking for and embrac- 
 ing these we shall be prepared to encounter the 
 fiercer storms of life that may await us, or to take 
 advantage of future opportunities that may offer for 
 our good. 
 
 A man's opportunity usually has some relation to 
 his ability. It is an opening for a man of his talents 
 and means. It is an opening for him to use what he 
 has faithfully and to the utmost. It requires toil, 
 self-denial, faith. If he says, "I want a better 
 
518 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 opportunity than that ; I am worthy of a higher 
 position than that," or if he thinks the opportunity 
 too insignificant to be embraced, he is very likely in 
 after years to see the folly of his course. There are 
 scores of young men all over the land who want to 
 acquire wealth, and yet every day scorn such oppor- 
 tunities as our really rich men would have improved. 
 They want to begin, not as others do, at the foot of 
 the ladder, but half way up. They want somebody 
 to give them a lift or to carry them up in a balloon, 
 so that they can avoid the early and arduous strug- 
 gles of the majority of those who have been suc- 
 cessful. 
 
 The most unsuccessful men are usually the ones 
 who think they could do great things if they only 
 had the opportunity. But something has always 
 prevented them. Providence has hedged them in so 
 that they could not carry out their plan. They 
 knew just how to get rich, but they lacked oppor- 
 tunity. A man can not expect that great opportuni- 
 ties will meet him all along through his life like 
 milestones by the wayside. Usually he has one or 
 two ; if he neglects them he is like the man who 
 takes the wrong course where several meet. The 
 farther he goes the worse he fares. In the Itfe of 
 the most unlucky persons there are always some 
 occasions when by prompt and vigorous action he 
 may win the thing he has at heart. " There is no- 
 body," says a Roman cardinal, ''whom fortune does 
 not visit once in his life. But when she finds he is 
 not ready to receive her, she goes in at the door and 
 
OPPORTUNITY. 519 
 
 out through the window." Opportunity is coy. The 
 careless, the slow, the unobservant, the lazy fail to 
 see her, or clutch at her when she has gone. The 
 sharp fellows detect her instantly, and seize her on 
 the wing. 
 
 It is ofttimes not sufficient to wait for opportunity, 
 even though improved when it has come. We must 
 not only strike the iron while it is hot, but make it 
 hot by striking. In other words, if opportunity does 
 not present herself we must try our best to compel 
 her attendance. Opportunity is in respect to time in 
 some sense as time. is in respect to eternity; it is the 
 small moment, the exact point, the critical minute on 
 which every good work so much depends. Hesita- 
 tion is in some instances a sign of weakness, and an 
 exhibition of caution instead of an aid is a hinderance. 
 At the critical moment there is no time for over- 
 sqeamishness ; else the opportunity slips away be- 
 yond recall, even as the spoken word or the sped 
 arrow. The period of life during which a man must 
 venture, if ever, is so limited that it is no bad rule 
 to preach up the necessity in such instances of a 
 little violence done to the feelings, and of efforts 
 made in defiance of strict and sober calculation, 
 rather than to pass one opportunity after another. 
 It is not accident that helps a man in the world, but 
 purpose and persistent industry. These make a man 
 sharp to discover opportunities and to turn them to 
 account. To the feeble, the sluggish and purpose- 
 less the happiest opportunities avail nothing. They 
 pass them by, seeing no meaning in them. But to 
 
520 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 the energetic, wide-awake man they are occasions of 
 great moment, the improvement of which contribute 
 in no small degree to his ultimate success. 
 
 
 DWffif. 
 
 " I slept, and dreamed that life was beauty; 
 I woke, and found that life was duty." 
 
 jUTY rounds out the whole of life, from our en- 
 trance into it until our exit from it. There is 
 W the duty to superiors, to inferiors, to equals, to 
 God and to man. Wherever there is power to 
 use or to direct, there is a duty devolving upon us. 
 Duty is a thing that is due and must be paid by 
 every man who would avoid present discredit, and 
 eventual moral insolvency. It is an obligation, a 
 debt, which can only be discharged by voluntary 
 effort and resolute action in the affairs of life. The 
 abiding sense of duty is the very crown of character. 
 It is the upholding law of man in his highest atti- 
 tudes. Without it the individual totters and falls 
 before the first puff of adversity or temptation ; 
 whereas, inspired by it, the weakest become strong 
 and full of courage. 
 
 "Duty," says Mrs. Jameson, "is the cement which 
 binds the whole moral edifice together, without which 
 all power, goodness, intellect, truth, happiness, love 
 itself, can have no permanence, but all the fabric of 
 
DUTY. 521 
 
 existence crumble away from under us, and leave us 
 at last sitting in the midst of a ruin, astonished at 
 our own desolation." Take man from the lowest 
 depths of poverty or from the downy beds of wealth, 
 and you will find that to- act well his part in life he 
 must recognize and live up to the rule of duty. As 
 the ship is safely guided across the ocean by a helm, 
 so on the ocean of existence duty is the helm, with- 
 out which life is lost. It is the lesson of history, no 
 less than the experience of the present age, that an 
 attention to duty in all of its details is the only sure 
 road to real greatness, whether individual or national. 
 Duty is based upon a sense of justice — -justice 
 inspired by love — which is the most perfect form of 
 goodness. Duty is not a sentiment, but a principle 
 pervading the life, and it exhibits itself in conduct 
 and in action. Duty is above all .consequences, and 
 often, at a crisis of difficulty, commands us to throw 
 them overboard. It commands us to look neither to 
 the right nor to the left, but straight forward. 
 Every signal act of duty is an act of faith. It is 
 performed in the assurance that God will take care 
 of the consequences, and will so order the course 
 of the world that, whatever the immediate results 
 may be, his word shall not return to him empty. The 
 voice of conscience speaks in duty done, and without 
 its regulating and controlling influence the brightest 
 and greatest intellect may be merely as a light that 
 leads astray. Conscience sets a man upon his feet, 
 while his will holds him upright. Conscience is the 
 moral governor of the heart, and only through its 
 
522 G0LDE2' 1EME ]7 TJFR 
 
 dominating influence can a noble and upright char- 
 acter be fully developed. That we ought to do an 
 action is of itself a sufficient and ultimate answer to 
 the question why we should do it. 
 
 The conscience may speak never so loudly, but 
 without energetic will it may speak in vain. The 
 will is free to choose between the right course and 
 the wrong one ; but the choice is nothing unless fol- 
 lowed by immediate and decisive action. If the 
 sense of duty be strong and the course of action 
 clear, the courageous will, upheld by the conscience, 
 enables a man to proceed on his course bravely, and 
 to accomplish his purposes in the face of all oppo- 
 sition and difficulty; and should failure be the issue. 
 there will remain a: ieas: the satisfaction that it has 
 been in the cause of duty. There is a sublimity in 
 ::r_s:;:as re::i:uae. a treasure ::: :: _ _e :.:: : ::.e. ■■:: 
 one's own mind, in comparison with which the treas- 
 ures of earth are not worth mentioning. The peace 
 and happiness arising from this are above all change 
 and beyond all decay. Disappointment and trials do 
 but improve them; they go with us into all places 
 and attend us through every changing scene of life. 
 They sustain and delight at home and abroad 
 day and by night, in solitude and in sc : iety in sick- 
 ness and in health, in time and eternity. All this 
 is sure to be the reward of him who knows his duty 
 and does it, regardless as :: what others say or as 
 : : : e i ediate res u I : s flowing from thence. 
 
 We all have good and bad in us. The good 
 would do what it ought to do; the bad does what it 
 
DUTY. 523 
 
 can. The good dwells in the kingdom of duty; the 
 bad sits on the throne of might. Duty is a loyal 
 subject ; might is a royal tyrant. Duty is the evan- 
 gel of God that proclaims the acceptable year of the 
 Lord; might is the scourge of the world that riots 
 in carnage, groans, and blood. Duty gains its vic- 
 tories by peace ; might conquers only by war. Duty 
 is a moralist resting on principle ; might is a world- 
 ling seeking for pleasure. These are the inward 
 principles contending with each other in every human 
 soul. 
 
 To live truly and nobly is to act energetically. 
 Life is a battle to be fought valiantly. Inspired by 
 high and honorable resolves a man must stand to his 
 post, and die there if necessary. Like the hero of 
 old his determination should be "to dare nobly, to 
 will strongly, and never to falter in the path of duty." 
 It has been truly said that man's real greatness con- 
 sists, not in seeking his own pleasure or fame, but 
 that every man shall do his duty. What most stands 
 in the way of the performance of duty is irresolution, 
 weakness of purpose, and indecision. On the one 
 side are conscience and the knowledge of good and 
 evil ; on the other are indolence, selfishness, and love 
 of pleasure. The weak and ill-disciplined will may 
 remained suspended for a time between these influ- 
 ences, but at length the balance inclines one way or 
 another, as the voice of conscience is heeded or 
 passed by. If its warning voice is unheeded the 
 lower influence of selfishness will prevail; thus char- 
 acter is degraded, and manhood abdicates its throne 
 
524 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 as ruler, and sinks to the level of slave to the 
 senses. 
 
 Be not diverted from your duty by any idle reflec- 
 tions the silly world may make upon you. Their 
 censures have no power over you, and, consequently, 
 should not be any part of your concern. No man's 
 spirits were ever hurt by doing his duty ; on the 
 contrary, one good action done, one temptation re- 
 sisted and overcome, one sacrifice of desire or inter- 
 est, purely for conscience's sake, will prove a cordial 
 for weak souls most salutary for their real good; 
 conducing not less to their present happiness and 
 welfare than to their eternal and unending good. 
 
 SK'IFE, no matter in what aspects it has been pre- 
 sented before us, when we come to the reality, 
 is full of pitfalls and entanglements, into which 
 our unwary feet often stumble. Day after day, 
 as we watch the different vicissitudes of life, we are 
 reminded of the frailty of human hopes and aspira- 
 tions. As the leaves of the tree, once flourishing, 
 once verdant, lose their vitality and finally waste 
 away, so it is with our desires and anticipations. 
 
 In youth we look forward ; the future appears 
 calm and tranquil ; as we approach manhood and 
 womanhood life changes its appearance and becomes 
 tempestuous and rough, as the ocean changes before 
 
TRIALS. 525 
 
 the advancing storm. In the changes of real life joy 
 and grief are never far apart. In the same street 
 the shutters of one house are closed, while the cur- 
 tains of the next are brushed by the passing dancers. 
 A wedding party returns from church, and a funeral 
 train leaves from the adjacent house. Gladness and 
 sighs brighten and dim the mirror of daily life. 
 Tears and laughter are twin-born. Like two chil- 
 dren sleeping in one cradle, when one wakes and 
 stirs the other wakes also. 
 
 Be not dismayed at the trials of life; they are 
 sent for your good. God knows what keys in the 
 human soul to touch in order to draw out its sweet- 
 est and most perfect harmonies. These may be the 
 strains of sadness and sorrow as well as the loftier 
 notes of joy and gladness. Think not that uninter- 
 rupted joy is good. The sunshine lies upon the 
 mountain top all day, and lingers there latest and 
 longest at eventide. Yet is the valley green and 
 fertile, while the peak is barren and unfruitful. 
 
 Trials come in a thousand different forms, and as 
 many avenues are open to their approach. They 
 come with the warm throbbing of our youthful lives, 
 keep pace with the measured tread of manhood's 
 noon, and depart not from the descending footsteps 
 of decrepitude and age. We may not hope to be 
 entirely free from either disciplinary trials or the fiery 
 darts of the enemy until we are through with life's 
 burdens. Men may be so old that ambition has no 
 charm, pleasures may pale on the senses, but they 
 are never too old to experience trials. 
 
526 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 Life all sunshine without shade, all happiness 
 without sorrow, all pleasure without pain, were not 
 life at all — at least not human life. Take the life of 
 the happiest. It is a tangled yarn. It is made up 
 of joys and sorrows, and the joys are all the sweeter 
 because of the sorrows. Even death itself makes 
 life more loving ; it binds us' more closely together 
 while living. The severer trials and hazardous en- 
 terprises of life call into exercise the latent faculties 
 of the soul of man. They are for the purpose of 
 putting his manhood to the test, and rouse in him 
 strength, hardihood, and valor. They may be hard 
 to take, though they strengthen the soul. Tonics 
 are always bitter. 
 
 Heaven, in its mercy, has placed the fountain of 
 wisdom in the hidden and concealed depths of the 
 soul, that the children of misfortune might seek and 
 find in its healthful waters the antidote and cordial 
 of their cares and calamities. Knowledge and sor- 
 row are blended together, and as closely and in- 
 separably so as ignorance and folly, and for reasons 
 equally as salutary and just. Such is the established 
 course of nature ; such is her best and wisest law. 
 When she leads us from what is frivolous and vain 
 in the land of darkness, and brings us to the im- 
 pressive and true in the land of light, the first act 
 she performs is to remove the scales from our eyes 
 that we may see and weep. We must first learn to 
 mourn and feel before we can know and think. And 
 the deeper we shall go into the depths below the 
 higher shall we ascend into the heights above. 
 
TRIALS. 527 
 
 • 
 
 Man is like a sword in a shop window. Men that 
 look upon the perfect blade do not dream of the pro- 
 cess by which it was completed. Man is a sword, 
 daily life is the workshop, and God is the artificer, 
 and the trials and sorrows of life the very things that 
 fashion the man. We should remember when borne 
 down by trials that they are sent to us only for our 
 instructions, even as we darken the cages of our 
 birds when we wish them to sing. Out of suffering 
 have emerged the strongest souls, the most massive 
 characters are seamed with cares, martyrs have put 
 on their coronation robes glittering with fire, and 
 through tears many caught their first glimpse of 
 heaven. 
 
 Never meet trouble half-way, but let him have 
 the whole walk for his pains. Perhaps he will give 
 up his visit even in sight of your house. If misfor- 
 tune comes be patient, and he will soon stalk out 
 again, for he can not bear cheerful company. Do 
 not think you are fated to be miserable, because you 
 are disappointed in your expectation and baffled in 
 your pursuits. Do not declare that God has for- 
 saken you when your way is hedged about with 
 thorns, when trials and troubles meet you on every 
 side. No man's life is free from struggles and morti- 
 fications, not even the happiest; but everyone may 
 build up his own happiness by seeking mental pleas- 
 ures, and thus making himself independent of out- 
 ward fortune. 
 
 The greatest misfortune of all is not to be able to 
 bear misfortune. Not to feel misfortune is not the part 
 
528 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 of a mortal; but not to bear it is not becoming in 
 a man. Calamity never leaves us where it finds us ; 
 it either softens or hardens the heart of its victim. 
 Misfortune is never mournful to the soul that accepts 
 it, for such do always see in every cloud an angel's 
 face. Every man deems that he has precisely the 
 trials and temptations which are the hardest of all 
 others for him to bear. From the manner in which 
 men bear their conditions we should ofttimes pity 
 the prosperous and envy the unfortunate. 
 
 The simplest and most obvious use of sorrow is 
 to remind us of God. It would seem that a certain 
 shock is needed to bring us in contact with reality. 
 We are not conscious of breathing till obstruction 
 makes it felt. So we are not conscious of the mighty 
 cravings of our half divine humanity, we are not 
 aware of the God within us, till some chasm yawns 
 which must be filled, or till the rending asunder of 
 our affection brings us to a consciousness of our need. 
 
 To mourn without measure is folly ; not to mourn 
 at all is insensibility. God says to the fruit-tree 
 bloom and bear, and to the human heart bear and 
 bloom. The soul's great blooming is the flower of 
 suffering. As the sun converts clouds into a glorious 
 drapery, firing them with gorgeous hues, draping the 
 whole horizon with its glorious costume, and writing 
 victory along their front, so sometimes a radiant heart 
 lets forth its hopes upon its sorrows, and all blackness 
 flies, and troubles that trooped to appall seem to 
 crowd around as a triumphant procession following 
 the steps of a victor. 
 
SICKNESS. 529 
 
 
 ISlCKNESS takes us aside and sets us alone with 
 »<4J% God. We are taken into his private chamber, 
 
 and there he converses with us face to face. 
 
 The world is afar off, our relish for it is gone, 
 and we are alone with Him. Many are the words 
 of grace and truth which he then speaks to us. All 
 our former props are struck away, and now we must 
 lean on God alone. The things of earth are felt to 
 be vanity. Man's sympathy deserts us. We are 
 cast wholly upon God, that we may learn that his 
 praise and his sympathy are enough. 
 
 There is something in sickness that lowers the 
 pride of manhood, that softens the heart, and brings 
 it back to the feelings of infancy. Who that has 
 languished, even in advanced life, in sickness, but 
 has thought of the mother who watched over his 
 childhood, who smoothed his pillow, and adminis- 
 tered to his helplessness ? When a man is laboring 
 under the pain of any distemper, it is then that he 
 recollects there is a God, and that he himself is but 
 a man. No mortal is then the object of his envy, 
 his admiration, or his contempt, and, having no mal- 
 ice to gratify, the tales of slander excite him not. 
 But it unveils to him his own heart. It shows him 
 the need there is for sympathy and love between 
 man and man. Thus disease, opening our eyes to 
 the realities of life, is an indirect blessing. One who 
 has never known a day's illness is lacking in one 
 
 34 
 
530 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 department, at least, of moral culture. He has lost 
 the greatest lesson of his life ; he has missed the 
 finest lecture in that great school of humanity, the 
 sick chamber. 
 
 Disease generally begins that equality which death 
 completes. The distinctions which set one man so 
 much above another are very little perceived in the 
 gloom of a sick chamber, where it will be vain to 
 expect entertainment from the gay or instruction 
 from the wise ; where all human glory is obliterated, 
 the wit is clouded, the reasoner perplexed, and the 
 hero subdued ; where the highest and brightest of 
 mortal beings finds nothing of real worth left him 
 but the consciousness of innocence. 
 
 Sickness brings a share of blessings with it. 
 What stores of human love and sympathy it reveals ! 
 What constant, affectionate care is ours ! what kindly 
 greetings from friends and associates ! This very 
 loosening of our hold upon life calls out such wealth 
 of human sympathy that life seems richer than be- 
 fore. Then, it teaches humility. Our absence is 
 scarcely noticed. From the noisy, wrestling world 
 we are separated completely ; yet our place is filled, 
 and all moves on without us. So we learn that when 
 at last we shall sink forever beneath the wavtes of 
 the sea of life, there will be but one ripple, and the 
 current will move steadily on. 
 
 It is on the bed of sickness that we fully realize 
 the value of good health. The first wealth is health. 
 Sickness is poor-spirited, and can not serve any one ; 
 but health is one of the greatest blessings we are 
 
SICKNESS. 531 
 
 capable of enjoying. Money can not buy it ; there- 
 fore, value it, and be thankful for it. Health is above 
 all gold and treasure. It enlarges the soul, and 
 opens all its powers to receive instruction and to 
 relish virtue. He that has health has but little more 
 to wish for ; and he that has it not, in the want of it 
 wants every thing. It is beyond price, since it is by 
 health that money is procured. Thousands, and even 
 millions, are small recompense for the loss of health. 
 Poverty is, indeed, an evil from which we naturally 
 fly ; but let us not run from one enemy to one still 
 more implacable, which is assuredly the lot of those 
 who exchange poverty for sickness, though accom- 
 panied by wealth. 
 
 In no situation and under no circumstances does 
 human character appear to better advantage than 
 when watching by the side of sickness. The help- 
 lessness and weakness of the sick chamber makes a 
 most effective appeal to the charity and natural kind- 
 ness inherent in the hearts of all, even of the most 
 degraded. Thus it appears that sickness is not only 
 of discipline to the sick one, but it serves also to 
 bring to a more perfect growth the flowers of charity 
 and kindness in the hearts of those who care for the 
 sick one. 
 
 It is on the sick-bed that the heart learns most 
 completely the value of self-examination. Life passes 
 before the sick one as a gliding panorama. How 
 strong are the resolutions formed for future guidance ! 
 And only God and the angels know how many lives 
 have been turned from evil courses to the right, have 
 
532 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 been snatched as brands from the burning, who can 
 date their progress in the good and true modes of 
 living from some bed of sickness. Then, let us be 
 patient in sickness. Let us turn it to account in the 
 bettering of our hearts, and thus may we reap from 
 seeming evil what will conduce in no small degree 
 to our ultimate happiness. 
 
 i|i|ORROWS gather around great souls as storms 
 <Aj# do around great mountains, but, like them, they 
 W break the storms and purify the air. Those 
 who have suffered much are like those who 
 know many languages — they have learned to un- 
 derstand and be understood by all. 
 
 Sorrows sober us and make the mind genial. In 
 sorrows we love and trust our friends more tenderly, 
 and the dead become dearer to us. Just as the 
 stars shine out in the night, so there are faces that 
 look at us in our grief, though before they were 
 fading from our recollections. Suffering ! Let no 
 man dread it too much, because it is better for him, 
 and will help make him sure of being immortal. 
 Just as it is only at night that other worlds are to 
 be seen shining in the distance, so it is in sorrow — 
 the night of the soul — that we see the farthest, and 
 know ourselves natives of infinity, sons and daugh- 
 ters of immortality. 
 
sorrow. 533 
 
 The path of life meanders through a bright and 
 beautiful world — a world where the fragrant flowers 
 of friendship, nourished by the gentle dews of sym- 
 pathy and the warm sunlight of affection, bloom in 
 perennial beauty. But through this bright world 
 there flows a stream whose turbid waters cross and 
 recross the path of every pilgrim. It is the stream 
 of human suffering. As the rose-tree is composed 
 of the sweetest flowers and the sharpest thorns ; as 
 the heavens are sometimes overcast, alternately tem- 
 pestuous and serene, so is the life of man intermin- 
 gled with hopes and fears, with joy and sorrow, with 
 pleasures, and with pains. 
 
 Life is beset with unavoidable annoyances, vexa- 
 tious cares, and harassing, events. But we endure 
 them — we strive to forget them — or, like the dust- 
 worn garment, or the soil on our shoes, we brush 
 them off, and, if possible, scarcely bestow a thought 
 on the trouble it requires. But when we have once 
 been called upon to feel and undergo a great sorrow, 
 to bend the back and bow the head, to endure the 
 yoke and suffer the agony, to abide the pelting of 
 the storm of adversity and sorrow, when few, perhaps 
 none, sympathize with us — these are the days of an- 
 guish and of darkness, these the nights of desolation 
 and despair ; and when they have once come upon us 
 with their appalling weight, their remorseless power, 
 we can never be beguiled into a forgetfulness of 
 them. The memory of them will endure as long as 
 life shall last. We may again behold the beams of 
 a cheerful sun throwing a delusive coloring over the 
 
534 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 landscape around us, but while our eyes may rest 
 upon the lights they will dwell upon the shadows of 
 the picture. 
 
 "Time is the rider that breaks youth/' To the 
 young how bright the new world looks ! how full of 
 novelty ! of enjoyment ! of pleasure ! But as years 
 pass on they are found to abound in sorrowful scenes 
 as well as those pleasant — scenes of toil, suffering, 
 difficulty, perhaps misfortune and failure. Happy 
 they who can pass through such trials with a firm 
 mind and a pure heart, encountering trials with cheer- 
 fulness, and standing erect beneath even the heaviest 
 burdens. 
 
 Sorrow is the noblest of all discipline. Our na- 
 ture shrinks from it, but it is not the less a discipline. 
 It is a scourge, but there is healing in its stripes. 
 It is a chalice, and the draught is bitter, but health 
 proceeds from the bitterness. It is a crown of 
 thorns, but it becomes a wreath of light on the 
 brow which it has lacerated. It is a cross on which 
 the spirit groans, but every Calvary has an Olivet. 
 To every place of crucifixion there is likewise a place 
 of ascension. The sun that is shrouded is unveiled, 
 and the heavens open with hopes eternal to the soul 
 which was nigh unto despair. Even in guilt sorrow 
 has a sanctity within it. Place a bad man beside the 
 death-bed, or the grave, where all that he loved is 
 cold — we are moved, we are won, by his affection, 
 and we find the divine spark yet alive, which no vice 
 could quench. 
 
 Christianity itself is a religion of sorrow. It was 
 
sorrow. 535 
 
 born in sorrow, in sorrow it was tried, and by sorrow 
 it was made perfect. The Author of Christianity was 
 a ''man of sorrow and acquainted with grief." Sor- 
 row is exalting, and a baptism of sorrow is awarded 
 to every one who strives for the higher life. Since 
 Christ wept over Jerusalem the best, the bravest, 
 who have followed him in good will and good deeds 
 have commenced their mission alike in suffering. 
 Sorrow is not to be complained of; it is the passport 
 by which we are to be made acceptable in that house 
 where all tears shall be wiped away. It has power 
 for good; it has joy within its gloom, and, though 
 Christianity is a religion of trials and suffering, it is 
 not less a religion of hope ; it casts down in order 
 to exalt, and if it tries the spirit by affliction it is to 
 prepare it for a future great reward. 
 
 i\ll mankind must taste the cup which destiny 
 has mixed, be it bitter or be it sweet. Be not im- 
 patient under suffering. It is for the correction of 
 thy soul. It is better to suffer than to injure. It is 
 better to suffer without a cause than that there should 
 be cause for our suffering. By experiencing distress 
 an arrogant insensibility of temper is most effectually 
 corrected. Endeavor to extract a blessing from the 
 remembrance of thy own sufferings. If so be that 
 Providence has so ordered your life that you are 
 not subject to much of the discipline of sorrow, strive 
 to extract this discipline from the consideration of the 
 lot of those less favored than you are. Step aside 
 occasionally from the flowers and smooth paths which 
 it is permitted you to walk in, in order to view the 
 
536 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 toilsome march of your fellow creatures through 
 the thorny desert. The designed end of temporal 
 afflictions is to cause men to consider their spir- 
 itual wants, and to seek the good of their higher 
 natures. 
 
 Often suffering not only fails to purify the soul 
 from sin, but aggravates and intensifies its selfish and 
 malignant passions. This is always the case where 
 the heart fails to accept the lesson taught. By sub- 
 mission to sorrow the sweetest traits of character are 
 developed, as some fruits are brought to perfection 
 only by frost. Misfortune should act upon us or 
 upon our feelings like fire upon old tenements, which 
 are consumed only to be rebuilt with greater perfec- 
 tion. The winds of adversity sweep over the soul 
 and scatter the fairest blossoms of hope. But the 
 blossoms fall that the fruit may appear. So with us, 
 when the flowers of hope are gone, there come the 
 fruits of long-suffering, patience, faith, and love. Thus 
 the darkest clouds which overhang human destiny 
 may often appear the brightest to the angels who 
 behold them with prophetic ken from heaven. 
 
 The damps of Autumn sink into the leaves and 
 prepare them for decay, and thus are we, insensibly 
 perhaps, detached from our hold on life by the gentle 
 pressure of recorded sorrows. Who is not familiar 
 with the fact that life, which to the young promises 
 so much, but to the middle-aged presents a stern 
 reality, seems to the old as a day's labor now clos- 
 ing; and even as the laborer, worn by the burdens 
 and heat of the day, looks forward to rest, so does 
 
sorrow. 537 
 
 the aged pilgrim, oppressed by the accumulated 
 griefs and sorrows of a life-time, look forward to 
 the rest of death ? 
 
 The first thing to be conquered in grief is the 
 pleasure we feel in indulging it. Persons may acquire 
 a morbid and unhealthy state of feeling, on this sub- 
 ject, and by a constant giving way to feelings of 
 grief become at last so constituted that on the slight- 
 est occasions they give way to apparently uncontroll- 
 able sorrow, converting thus what was intended as a 
 means of discipline necessary to soul growth into an 
 evil which contracts life. Remember, then, that in 
 the matter of giving expression to sorrow self-control 
 is no less necessary than in the other affairs of life. 
 There is but one pardonable grief — that for the de- 
 parted. This pleasing grief is but a variety of 
 comfort, the sighs are but a mournful mode of 
 loving them. 
 
 There are sorrows too sacred to be babbled to 
 the world, griefs which one would forbear to whisper 
 even to a friend. Real sorrow is not clamorous. It 
 seeks to shun every eye, and breathes in solitude and 
 silence the sighs that come from the heart. Every 
 heart has also its secret sorrows, of which the world 
 knows nothing, and ofttimes we call a man cold when 
 he is only sorrowful. Sorrow may be divided into 
 two classes — that which really comes from the heart 
 and is for the bettering of man, and that which comes 
 from wounded selfishness, egotism, and pride. It is 
 our duty to strive against giving vent to the latter 
 kind of sorrow. It is, after all, only selfish in feeling 
 
538 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 and expression. It is the duty of all to cultivate 
 cheerfulness of manner and disposition. Another 
 hath said, " Give not thy mind to heaviness. The 
 gladness of heart is the life of man, and the joyful- 
 ness of a man prolongeth his days. Remove sorrow 
 far from thee, for sorrow hath killed many, and there 
 is no profit therein ; and carefulness bringeth age be- 
 fore the time." 
 
 As limbs which are wrenched violently asunder do 
 not bleed, so the sudden shocks of overwhelming sor- 
 row are unrelieved by tears. The heart is benumbed. 
 The eyes are dry, and the very fountain of feeling 
 obstructed and stagnant. Our lighter afflictions find 
 relief in lamentations and weeping, and the voice of 
 sympathy and compassion brings some consolation 
 and peace. But when the heart has been deeply 
 and powerfully struck by some cruel blow of destiny, 
 the intensity of suffering exceeds the bounds of 
 sensibility and emotion. 
 
 Those who work hard seldom yield themselves 
 entirely up to real or fancied sorrow. When grief 
 sits down, folds its hands, and mournfully feeds upon 
 its own tears, weaving the dim shadows that a little 
 exertion might sweep away into oblivion, the strong 
 spirit is shorn of its might, and sorrow becomes our 
 master. When sorrow, then, pours upon you, in- 
 stead of giving way to it, rather seek by occupation 
 to divert the dark waters that threaten to overwhelm 
 you into the thousand channels which the duties of 
 life always present. Before you dream of it those 
 waters will fertilize the present and give birth to 
 
POVERTY. 539 
 
 flowers that may brighten the future — flowers that 
 will become pure and holy in the sunshine which 
 illumes the path of duty, in spite of every obstacle. 
 
 jT can not be too often repeated that it is not the 
 so-called blessings of life, its sunshine and calms ) 
 that makes men, but its rugged experiences, its 
 storms, tempests, and trials. Early poverty, es- 
 pecially, is emphatically a blessing in disguise. The 
 school of poverty graduates the ablest pupils. It 
 does more, perhaps, than any thing else to develop 
 the energetic, self-reliant traits of character, without 
 which the highest ability makes but sorry work of 
 life's battles. Thousands of men are bemoaning 
 present indigence and obscurity who might have won 
 riches and honor had they only been compelled by 
 early poverty to develop their manhood. As well 
 expect the oak to grow strong in the atmosphere of 
 the hot-house as that man would reach his best estate 
 surrounded from earliest years by the comforts and 
 luxury of wealth. 
 
 Many of the evils of poverty are imaginary, aris- 
 ing from mistaken notions we may entertain as to 
 what constitutes happiness and comfort. There is 
 not such a difference as some men imagine between 
 the poor and the rich. In pomp, show, and opinion 
 there is a great deal, but little as to the real pleas- 
 
540 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 ures and joys of life. No man is poor who does not 
 think himself so. But if in a full fortune, with impa- 
 tience he desires more, he proclaims his wants and 
 his beggarly condition. We are more and more im- 
 pressed that the poor are only they who feel poor. 
 He whom we esteem wealthy in a true scale would 
 perhaps be found very indigent. Of what avail the 
 wealth of Crcesus if the heart feels pinched and 
 poor ? 
 
 It is one of the mysteries of our life that genius, 
 the noblest gift of God to man, is nourished by pov- 
 erty. Its noblest works have been achieved by the 
 sorrowing ones of the world in tears and despair. 
 Not in the brilliant saloon, furnished with every com- 
 fort and elegance ; not in the library, well-fitted, 
 softly carpeted, and looking out upon a smooth, 
 green lawn or a broad expanse of scenery ; not in 
 ease and competence, — is genius born and nurtured. 
 More frequently in adversity and destitution, amidst 
 the harassing cares of a straitened household, in bare 
 and fireless garrets, is genius born and reared. This 
 is its birthplace, and with such surroundings have 
 men labored, studied, and trained themselves, until 
 they have at last emanated out of the gloom of that 
 obscurity, the shining lights of their time, and exer- 
 cised an influence upon the thoughts of the world 
 amounting to a species of intellectual legislation. 
 
 If there is any thing in the world that a young 
 man should be more grateful for than another, it is 
 the poverty which necessitates his starting in life 
 under very great disadvantages. Poverty is one of 
 
POVERTY. 541 
 
 the best tests of human quality in existence. A tri- 
 umph over it is like graduating with honor from West 
 Point. It demonstrates stuff and stamina. It is a 
 certificate of worthy labor faithfully performed. A 
 young man who can not stand this test is not good 
 for any thing. He can never rise above a drudge or 
 a pauper. If he can not feel his will harden as the 
 yoke of poverty presses upon him, and his pluck rise 
 with every difficulty that poverty throws in his way, 
 he may as well withdraw from the conflict, since his 
 defeat is already assured. Poverty saves a thousand 
 times more men than it ruins ; for it only ruins those 
 who are not worth saving, while it saves multitudes 
 of those whom wealth would have ruined. 
 
 It is of decided advantage for a man to be under 
 the necessity of having to struggle with poverty, and 
 conquer it. " He who has battled," says Carlyle, 
 "were it only with poverty and toil, will be found 
 stronger and more expert than he who could stay at 
 home from the battle." It is not prosperity so much 
 as adversity, not wealth so much as poverty, that 
 stimulates the perseverance of strong and healthy 
 natures, rouses their energy, and develops their char- 
 acter. Indeed, misfortune and poverty have fre- 
 quently converted the indolent votary of society into 
 a useful member of the community, and made him a 
 moving power in the great workshop of the world, 
 teaching men, and developing the powers which 
 nature has bestowed on them. 
 
 Poverty is the great test of civility and the touch- 
 stone of friendship. Amid the poverty and privation 
 
542 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 of the humblest homes are often found scenes of 
 magnanimity and self-denial as utterly beyond the 
 belief as it is the practices of the great and rich — 
 acts of self-denial, kindness, and generosity, which 
 borrow no support either from the gaze of the many 
 or the admiration of the few, yet giving daily exhibi- 
 tions of its strength and constancy. It is the great 
 privilege of poverty to be happy and unenvied, to be 
 healthy without physic, secure without a guard, and 
 to obtain from the bounty of nature what the great 
 and wealthy are compelled to procure by the help 
 of art. 
 
 Few are the real wants and necessities of mankind. 
 Some men with thousands a year suffer more for 
 want of means than others with only hundreds. The 
 reason is v found in the artificial wants of the former. 
 Though his income is great his wants are still 
 greater, and, as a consequence, his income is not 
 equal to his outgo. There are many wealthy people 
 who, of course, enjoy their wealth, but there are 
 thousands who never know a moment's peace be- 
 cause they live above their means. He who earns 
 but a dollar a day, and does not run in debt, is a 
 happier man. The great secret of being solvent and 
 well-to-do and comfortable is to get ahead of your ex- 
 penses. Eat and drink this month what you earned 
 last month, not what you are going to earn the next. 
 
 Poverty may be a bitter draught, yet it often is 
 a tonic, strengthening all the powers of manhood. 
 Though the drinker makes a wry face there is, after 
 all, a wholesome goodness in the cup. But debt, 
 
POVERTY. 543 
 
 however courteously it may be offered, is the cup of 
 a siren, and the wine, spiced and delicious though 
 it be, is poison. The man out of debt, though with 
 a flaw in his jerkin and a hole in his hat, is still 
 the son of liberty, free as the singing bird above 
 him; but the debtor, although clothed in the utmost 
 bravery, what is he but a serf out upon a holiday? 
 a slave to be reclaimed at every instant by his owner, 
 the creditor? 
 
 Poverty is never felt so severely as by those who 
 have seen better days. The poverty of the poor has 
 many elements of hardness, but it is endurable, and 
 is developing their strength and endurance. The 
 poverty of the formerly affluent is, indeed, hard ; it 
 avoids the light of the day and shuns the sympathy 
 of those who would relieve its wants ; it preys upon 
 the heart and corrodes the mind ; the sunshine of life 
 is gone, and it requires a strong mind to resolutely 
 set about to mend the impaired fortune. 
 
 It is the misfortune of many young persons to- 
 day that they begin life with too many advantages. 
 Every possible want of their many-sided nature is 
 supplied before it is consciously felt. Books, teach- 
 ers, mental and religious training, lectures, amuse- 
 ments, clothes, and food, all of the best quality, and 
 without stint in quantity — in short, the pick of the 
 world's good things — and help of every kind are 
 lavished upon them, till satiety results, and all ambi- 
 tion is extinguished. What motive has a young man 
 for whom life is thus "thrice winnowed" to exert 
 himself? Having supped full of life's sweets he finds 
 
544 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 them palling on his taste ; having done nothing to 
 earn its good things he can not appreciate their 
 value. Like a hot-house plant, grown weak and 
 spindling through too much shelter and watching, 
 he needs nothing so much as to be set in the open 
 air of the world, and to grow strong with struggling 
 for existence. 
 
 It is a fact that the working, successful men of 
 to-day were once industrious, self-reliant boys. And 
 the same thing will be repeated, for from the ranks 
 of the hard-working, economical, temperate, and self- 
 reliant boys of to-day will emanate the progressive, 
 prominent men of the future. All boys should grow 
 up strong as steel bars, fighting their way to an ed- 
 ucation, and then, when they are all ready, plunging 
 into real life. The majority of the men of mark in 
 this country are not the sons of those whose fathers 
 could give them all they want, and much more than 
 they should have, but are those who were brought 
 up in cottages and cabins, cutting their way through 
 difficulties on every side to their present commanding 
 position. 
 
 Of all poverty that of the mind is the most de- 
 plorable. And it is, at the same time, without ex- 
 cuse. Every one who wills it can lay in a rich store 
 of mental wealth. The poor man's purse may be 
 empty, but he has as much gold in the sunset, and 
 as much silver in the moon, as any body. Wealth 
 of heart is not dependent upon wealth of purse. 
 Home comfort and happiness does not depend upon 
 elegance of surroundings. But it is found in the 
 

 r J | [ 
 
AFFLICTION. 545 
 
 spirit presiding over the household ; this is the spirit 
 of loving kindness, and is as apt to dwell with pov- 
 erty as with wealth. Thus the evils of poverty are 
 much exaggerated. And the evils, if evils they be, 
 are, after all, for our own ultimate good. 
 
 o,W^ 
 
 ^SiitemioK, 
 
 ijUllHERE is an elasticity to the human mind ca- 
 ^^N pable of bearing much, but which will not show 
 t! itself until a certain weight of affliction be put 
 upon it. " Fear not the darkness," saith the Per- 
 sian proverb; "it conceals perhaps the springs of the 
 water of life." Experience is often bitter, but whole- 
 some. Only by its teachings can we learn to suffer 
 and be strong. Character in its highest forms is 
 disciplined by trial and made perfect through suffer- 
 ing. Even from the deepest sorrow the patient and 
 thoughtful mind will gather a richer mead than 
 pleasure ever yielded. 
 
 Think it not unkind when afflictions befall thee ; 
 it is all for the best that they are sent. God calls 
 those whom he loveth, and why should he not claim 
 his own jewels to shine in his house, though our 
 own be made dreary ? It may seem hard under such 
 circumstances to say that it is "all for the best." 
 The human heart is prone to give over to grief and 
 lamentations ; but wait, soon, when like the tired pil- 
 grim thou shalt fall sick and weary, He will take you 
 
 35 
 
546 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 home to rejoice in finding friends from whom you 
 have been separated. Then how true will be the 
 saying that "it was all for the best!" 
 
 Sad accidents and a state of affliction are a school 
 of virtue. It reduces our spirits to soberness and 
 our counsels to moderation ; it corrects levity. God, 
 who governs the world in mercy and wisdom, never 
 would have suffered the virtuous ones to endure so 
 many keen afflictions did he not intend that they 
 should be the seminary of comfort, the nursery of 
 virtue, the exercise of wisdom, and the trial of pa- 
 tience, the venturing for a crown and the gate of 
 glory. Much of the most useful work done by men 
 and women has been done amidst afflictions — some- 
 times as a relief from it, sometimes as a sense of 
 duty overpowering personal sorrow. 
 
 Adversity is the touch-stone of character. As 
 some herbs need to be crushed to give forth their 
 sweetest odors, so some natures need to be tried by 
 suffering to evoke the excellence that is in them. 
 Grief is a common bond that unites hearts. It can 
 knit hearts closer than happiness can, and common 
 sufferings are far stronger links than common joys. 
 The visitations of sorrow are universal. There beats 
 not a heart but that it has felt the force of affliction. 
 There is not an eye but has witnessed many scenes 
 of sorrow. 
 
 They are always impaired by sorrow who are not 
 thereby improved. Some natures are like grapes — 
 the more they are downtrodden the richer tribute 
 they supply. It may be affirmed substantially that 
 
AFFLICTION. 547 
 
 good men reap more real benefit from their affliction 
 than bad men do from their prosperities ; for what 
 they lose in wealth, pleasure, or honor they gain in 
 wisdom and tranquillity of mind. " No creature would 
 be more unhappy," said Demetrius, "than a man who 
 had never known affliction." The best need afflic- 
 tions for the trial of their virtue. How can we exer- 
 cise the grace of contentment if all things succeed 
 well ? or that of forgiveness if we have no enemies ? 
 
 At a superficial view it appears that adversity 
 happens to all alike, without regard to rank or con- 
 dition. The good are apparently as little favored by 
 fortune in this respect as the bad, the high as the 
 humble. People are continually rising and falling in 
 all the grades of society. We often see men of high 
 expectations suddenly cut down, and left to struggle 
 with despair and ruin. If the happiness of mankind 
 depended upon the caprice of fortune, their condition 
 would be wretched. But it is possible to possess a 
 mind which will not lose its tranquillity in the severest 
 adversity, or at least such a one as, being disturbed and 
 deprived of its wonted serenity by a sudden calamity, 
 will recover in a short period, and assume its native 
 buoyancy by the shock which it has experienced. 
 
 How uncertain is human life! There is but a 
 breath of air and a beat of a heart betwixt this 
 world and the next. In the brief interval of painful 
 and awful suspense, while we feel that death is pres- 
 ent with us, we are powerless and he all powerful. 
 The last faint pulsation here is but the pre'ude of 
 endless joys hereafter. In the midst of the stunning 
 
548 v GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 calamity about to befall us, when death is in the 
 family circle, and some loved one is about to be 
 taken from us, we feel as if earth had no compensat- 
 ing good to mitigate the severity of our loss. But 
 we forget that there is no grief without some benef- 
 icent provisions to soften its intensities. Thus in the 
 presence of death there is also a consolation. Has 
 the life been stormy ? There is now .rest ; rest for 
 the troubled heart and the weary head. And it can 
 be known only by experience with what a longing 
 many hearts thus look forward to the rest of death. 
 Many whom the world regards as peculiarly blessed 
 by Providence carry with them such corroding, anx- 
 ious cares that it is with a feeling of relief that they 
 contemplate the approach of deatb. To them death 
 comes in its most beautiful form. He borrows the 
 garb of gentle sleep, lays down his iron scepter, and 
 his cold hand falls as warm as the hand of friendship 
 over the weary heart now ceasing to beat. 
 
 Grief or misfortune seems to be indispensable to 
 the development of intelligence, energy, and virtue. 
 The trials to which humanity are subject are neces- 
 sary to draw them from their lethargy, to disclose 
 their character. Afflictions even have the effect of 
 eliciting talents which, in prosperous circumstances, 
 would have lain dormant. Suffering, indeed, seems 
 to have been as divinely appointed as joy, while it is 
 much more influential as a discipline of character. 
 Suffering may be the appointed means by which the 
 highes* nature of man is to be disciplined and devel- 
 oped, oometimes a heart-break rouses an impassive 
 
AFFLICTION. 549 
 
 nature to life. " What does he know," said a sage, 
 " who has not suffered?" 
 
 No soul is so obscure that God does not take 
 thought for its schooling. The sun is the central 
 light of the solar system ; but it has a mission to the 
 ripening corn and the purpling clusters on the vine, 
 as well as the ponderous planet. The sunshine that 
 comes filtering through the morning mists with heal- 
 ing on its wings, and charming all the birds to sing- 
 ing, should have also a message from God to sad 
 hearts. No soul is so grief-laden that it may not be 
 lifted to sources of heavenly comfort by recognizing 
 the Divine love in the perpetual recurrence of earthly 
 blessings. 
 
 Afflictions sent by Providence must be submitted 
 to in a humble spirit, Otherwise they will not con- 
 duce to lasting good. The same furnace that hardens 
 clay liquefies gold; and the manifestation of Divine 
 power Pharaoh found his punishment, but David his 
 pardon. As the musician straineth at his strings, 
 and yet breaketh none of them, but maketh thereby 
 a sweeter melody and better concord, so God, through 
 affliction, makes his own better unto the fruition and 
 enjoyment of the life to come. Afflictions are the 
 medicine of the mind. If they are not toothsome, 
 let it suffice that they are wholesome. It is not re- 
 quired in physic that it should please, but that it 
 should heal. 
 
 Let one of our loved ones be taken away, 
 and memory recalls a thousand sayings to regret. 
 Death quickens recollection painfully. The grave 
 
550 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 can not hide the white face of the one who sleeps. 
 The coffin and the green mound are cruel magnets. 
 They draw us further than we would go. They 
 force us to remember. A man never sees so far into 
 human life as when he looks over a wife's or a moth- 
 er's grave. His eyes get wondrous clear then, and 
 and he sees as never before what it is to love and be 
 loved, what it is to injure the feelings of the beloved. 
 
 When death comes into a household, we do not 
 philosophize ; we only feel. The eyes that are full 
 of tears do not see, though, in the course of time, 
 they come to see more clearly and brightly than 
 those that have never known sorrow. Perhaps the 
 heaviest affliction of life is that of the mother who has 
 lost a child. As the waters roll in on shore with in- 
 cessant throbs — not alone when storms prevail, but 
 in calms as well — so it is with a mother's heart, be- 
 reaved of her children. Death always speaks with a 
 voice of instruction and reproof; but when the first 
 death happens in a home it speaks with a voice 
 which scarcely any other form of tribulation can 
 equal. 
 
 Some of the saddest experiences of life come 
 without premonition. Yesterday life went well ; hope 
 was in the ascendant ; it was easy to be content. 
 To-day all is reversed. The crushed heart can 
 scarcely lift itself to pray ; speech seems paralyzed. 
 It seems cruel that such calamity should be permit- 
 ted, when we might have been so happy. Was there 
 not some way by which it could have been avoided ? 
 What are life's compensations now? What are its 
 
AFFLICTION. 551 
 
 ambitions worth in the face of this ? In a great 
 affliction there is no light, either in the mind or in 
 the sun ; for when the inward light is fed with fra- 
 grant oil, there can be no darkness, though clouds 
 should cover the sun. But when, like a sacred lamp 
 in the temple, the inward light is quenched, there is 
 no light outwardly, though a thousand suns should 
 preside in the heavens. 
 
 Why should body and soul be plunged into sor- 
 row's dungeon when God sees fit to afflict? Is not 
 the world as bright as of yore ? Are there not still 
 some happy phases to life's weary pilgrimage ? We 
 should not complain of oppression, but, with submis- 
 sion and love, perform the duties of life ; and though 
 sorrow and grief come, we must not let darkness 
 obscure the talents which God has given to promote 
 our own and others' happiness, or bury them with 
 the brighter past, but nobly use them, and count all 
 sorrow as naught in comparison with the future great 
 reward of rio-ht actions. After this life of sorrow 
 and pain, where we are continually weighed down 
 with care, there is a home of perpetual rest, the 
 streets of which are thronged w ith an angelic host, 
 who. " with songs on their lips and with harps in 
 their hands," tell neither the sorrow nor grief which 
 perhaps wasted their lives. To bear the ills of life 
 patiently is one of the noblest virtues, and one that 
 requires as vigorous an exercise of the will as to 
 resent the encroachments of wrong. 
 
552 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 jT is sometimes of God's mercy that men in the 
 eager pursuit of ambitious plans are baffled ; for 
 they are very like a train on down grade — pull- 
 ing on the brake is not pleasant, but it keeps the 
 car on the track. We mount to heaven mostly on 
 the ruins of our cherished schemes, finding in our 
 failures our real successes. 
 
 Disappointments seem to be the lot of man. 
 From the little child with golden hair attempting to 
 catch the glancing sunbeams to the old man who, 
 with whitened locks and bent frame, pursues some 
 scheme of wealth, disappointment is the almost inev- 
 itable consequence. Well it is for us that the future 
 is veiled from our eyes, else we would weary of the 
 trials and allurements that make up the sum of our 
 existence. The child looks forward to manhood; his 
 dreams are speculative ; the man looks back to child- 
 hood, and thinks of the happy days of old. From 
 the time he sits on his mother's knee, with the sun- 
 light streaming in through the open window, until 
 the last hours of life, when the sunlight glances in 
 through closed shutters, he is playing with shadows. 
 
 And one of the saddest thoughts that come to us 
 in life is the thought that in this bright, beautiful, 
 joy-giving world of ours there are so many shadowed 
 lives. If disappointment came only to the lot of the 
 sinning, even then we might drop a tear over him 
 whose errors wrought their own recompense. But 
 
DISAPPOINTMENTS. 553 
 
 it is not so. The most pure lives are sometimes 
 those that are the fullest of disappointments. With 
 one it is the wreck of a great ambition. He has 
 builded his ship, and launched it on the sea of life 
 freighted with the richest jewels of his strength and 
 manhood. Behold, it comes back to him beaten, 
 battered, and torn by the fury of the gale — the wreck 
 of a first trial. 
 
 Many are disappointed because they do not look 
 for happiness and success either in the right spirit 
 or by the proper methods. There is a legend told 
 of a knight who, — 
 
 " In the brave days of old," 
 
 journeyed far away in search of the Holy Grail. He 
 engaged in great pursuits. He sought the most ar- 
 duous undertakings. But failing to seek in the right 
 spirit his search and his efforts were in vain. At 
 length, wearied and disappointed, he sought his na- 
 tive land. Here, in the work of daily, trifling duties, 
 humbly seeking to do what was right, he unexpect- 
 edly found that for which he had so long searched. 
 In life we all seek happiness and success. There 
 is but one way in which we can succeed ; when we 
 admit that happiness is but a state of the mind, and 
 that success is the faithful performance of known 
 duties, then shall we acquire both. Though we may 
 wander the wide world over, and gather wealth and 
 fame, they will be found impotent to confer happiness, 
 and life to us will seem full of disappointments ; but 
 it is so simply because we failed to seek for life in 
 
554 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 that spirit of quiet content which alone conducts us 
 to its portals. 
 
 It never yet happened to any man since the be- 
 ginning of the world, nor ever will, to have all things 
 according to his desires. And there never was any 
 one yet to whom fortune was not at some time op- 
 posite and adverse. Those who risk nothing can, of 
 course, lose nothing; sowing no hopes they can not 
 suffer from the blight of disappointment. But let 
 him who is enlisted for the war expect to meet the 
 foe. It is with life's troubles as with the risks of the 
 battle-field ; there is always less of aggregate danger 
 to the party who stands firm than to the one who 
 gives way. To give way to disappointments is to 
 invite defeat. To bravely cast about for means to 
 resist them is to put them to flight, and out of tem- 
 porary misfortune to lay the foundation of a more 
 glorious success. Send disappointments to the winds ; 
 take life as it is, and, with a strong will, make it as 
 near what it should be as possible. 
 
 Dark and full of disappointments may be our lot, 
 and we may not be able to fathom the reason for 
 them ; but if we can only bring ourselves to see that 
 they are for our good, that we need their chastening 
 influence, all will be well in the end. In the trials 
 of life we must look more for consolation within than 
 from without. The surest consolations of life are 
 those which we thus derive from our own thoughts. 
 For this end it matters not so much whether we 
 spend time in study or toil ; the thoughts of the mind 
 should go out and reach after higher good. In this 
 
DISAPPOINTMENTS. 555 
 
 manner we may improve ourselves till our thoughts 
 come to be sweet companions that shall lead us along 
 the paths of virtue. Thus we may grow better 
 within, whilst the cares of life, the losses and the 
 disappointments lose their sharp thorns, and the 
 journey of life be made comparatively pleasant and 
 happy. 
 
 It is generally known that he who expects much 
 will be often disappointed ; yet disappointment sel- 
 dom cures us of expectations. It is human to err; 
 so it is the lot of mortals to be disappointed, for 
 never yet did error secure the end wished. It is, 
 however, the better philosophy to take things calmly 
 and endeavor to be content with our lot. We may 
 at least add some rays of sunshine to our path if we 
 earnestly endeavor to dispel the clouds of discontent 
 that may arise in our bosom, and by so doing enjoy 
 more fully the bountiful blessing that God gives to 
 his humblest creatures. The great secret of avoid- 
 ing disappointment is not to expect too much. De- 
 spair follows immoderate hopes, as the higher a body 
 rises the heavier it falls to the ground. 
 
 Time is the great consoler of the world, inas- 
 much as he heals our sorrows and trials. But time, 
 in dashing to pieces our most cherished plans and 
 brightest dreams, also brings us to many disappoint- 
 ments which in turn disappear 'with the passage of 
 years. While sagacity contrives, patience matures, 
 and labor industriously executes, disappointment 
 laughs at the curious fabric formed by so many 
 efforts and gay with so many brilliant colors, and 
 
556 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 when the artist imagines the work arrived at the 
 moment of completion, brushes away the beautiful 
 fabric, and leaves nothing behind. 
 
 We thus see that life is, indeed, a variegated scene, 
 full of trials and full of joys — bright dreams, some 
 fulfilled, more disappointed. What is the lesson for 
 us to learn from this ? Perhaps the truest philoso- 
 phy is not to expect much, to be moderate in our 
 plans and hopes. In youth especially are we apt to 
 be over sanguine. Reflect that life is full of disap- 
 pointments, that it is vain for you to expect to escape 
 them. But also learn to go forward with a brave 
 face. You may fail, but from this failure you can 
 organize future success. Because disappointed in 
 one particular plan, it is no reason why you should 
 abandon all plans, and settle down to the conviction 
 that life itself is a failure. Show yourself a man, 
 and rise superior to misfortune, and you will be 
 rewarded by a final victory made more glorious by 
 temporary discouragement, just as the sun burst- 
 ing from behind the clouds lights up the landscape 
 with a more glorious light because of the storms of 
 the morning. 
 
FAILURE. 557 
 
 |pT is a mistake to suppose that men succeed 
 *#* through success ; they much oftener succeed 
 
 o&v .1 ir-i t» r ,1 i ■ , • r 
 
 •^ 
 
 through failure. By far the best experience of 
 men, experience from which they gain the most 
 of lasting value, is gathered from their failures in 
 their dealings with others in the affairs of life. Such 
 failures, for sensible men, incite to better self-man- 
 agement and greater tact and self-control, as a means 
 of avoiding them in the future. Ask the successful 
 business man, and he will tell you that he learned the 
 secret of success through being baffled, defeated, 
 thwarted, and circumvented, far more than from his 
 successes. Precept, study, advice, and example could 
 never have taught them so well as failure has done. 
 It has disciplined and taught them what to do as well 
 as what not to do. And this latter is often of more 
 importance than the former. 
 
 Many have to make up their minds to encounter 
 failure again and again before they finally succeed ; 
 but if they have pluck, the failure will only serve to 
 rouse their energies, and stimulate them to renewed 
 efforts. Failure in one direction has sometimes had 
 the effect of forcing the far-seeing student to apply 
 himself in another, which latter application has in 
 many instances proven to be in just the line that 
 they were fitted for. No one can tell how many of 
 the world's most brilliant geniuses have succeeded 
 because of their first failures. Failures in many in- 
 
558 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 stances are only means that Providence takes to 
 work an otherwise too pliable disposition into one 
 fitted to confront the stern duties of life. Even as 
 steel is tempered by heat, and, through much ham- 
 mering and changing of original form, is at last 
 wrought into useful articles, so in the history of 
 many men do we find that they were attempered in 
 the furnace of trials and affliction, and only through 
 failures in first attempts were at length fitted for the 
 ultimate success that crowned their efforts. 
 
 They are doubly in error who suffer themselves 
 to give up the battle at one, or even two successive, 
 failures. As in the military field he is the greater 
 general who from defeat organizes ultimate victory, 
 so in the battle of life he is the true hero who, 
 even while smarting under the sting of present fail- 
 ure, lays his plans and summons his forces for a tri- 
 umphant victory. We must not allow our jaundiced 
 views to prevail over our knowledge of men and 
 affairs. The world is not coming to an end, nor 
 society going to destruction, because our petty plans 
 have miscarried. The present failure should only 
 teach you to be more wary in the future, and thus 
 will you gather a rich harvest as the final outcome 
 of your efforts. 
 
 Above all, do not sink into apathy and despair. 
 Rouse yourself, and do not allow your best years to 
 slip past because you have not succeeded as you 
 thought you would. Is not the sun as bright, na- 
 ture as smiling as before ? Why, then, do you go 
 about as if all hope had fled ? Know you not that 
 
FAILURE. 559 
 
 "In the reproof of chance 
 Lies the true proof of men." 
 
 As in the physical world, disease is but the effort 
 nature makes to remove some pressing evil, so failure 
 should be but the methods whereby we are enabled 
 to eliminate those traits of character which are a 
 hindrance to our lasting success. As the inventor 
 subjects his production to the most rigorous tests in 
 order that inherent defects may become known and, 
 if possible, remedied, even so does Providence, in 
 subjecting us to great trials, discover to us by our 
 failures wherein we lack ; and we are remiss in duty 
 to ourselves do we not most earnestly endeavor to 
 improve by these tests ? 
 
 The man who never failed is a myth. Such a 
 one never lived, and is never likely to. All success 
 is a series of efforts in which, when closely viewed, 
 are to be seen more or less failures. These efforts 
 are ofttimes not visible to the naked eye, but each 
 individual heart is painfully conscious of how many 
 of its most cherished plans ended only in failures. 
 If you fail now and then, do not be discouraged ; 
 bear in mind that it is only the part and experience 
 of every successful man. We might even go farther, 
 and say that the most successful men often have the 
 most failures. These failures, which to the feeble are 
 mere stumbling-blocks, to the strong serve to remove 
 the scales from their eyes, so that they now see 
 clearer, and go on their way with a firmer tread and 
 a more determined mien, and compel life to yield to 
 them its most enduring trophies. 
 
560 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 The weakling goes no farther than his first fail- 
 ure ; he lags behind, and subsides into a life of dis- 
 content and vain regrets ; and so by this winnowing 
 process the number of the athletes is restricted to 
 few, and there is clear space in the arena for those 
 who determinedly press on. There can hardly be 
 found a successful man who will not admit that he 
 was made so by failure, and that what he once 
 thought his hard fate was in reality his good fortune. 
 Success can not be gained by a hop, skip, and a 
 jump, but by arduous passages of gallant persever- 
 ance, toilsome efforts long sustained, and, most of 
 all, by repeated failure ; for the failures are but step- 
 ping-stones, or, at the worst, non-attainment of the 
 desired end before the time. 
 
 If success were to crown your efforts now, where 
 would be the great success of the future ? It is the 
 brave resolution to do better next time that lays the 
 substrata of all real greatness. Many a prominent 
 reputation has been destroyed by early success. 
 Too often the effect of such success is to sap the 
 energies. Imagining fame or fortune to be won, 
 future efforts are remitted ; relying on the fame of 
 past achievements, the fact is overlooked that it is 
 labor alone that renders any success certain ; and so 
 by the remission of labor and energy, disgrace or 
 failure awakens him from his delusive dreams ; but, 
 alas ! in how many instances the awakening comes 
 too late ! 
 
 There is no more prolific source of repining and 
 discontent in life than that found in looking back 
 
FAILURE. 561 
 
 upon past mistakes. We are fond of persuading 
 ourselves and others that had others acted differently 
 our whole course in life would have been one of un- 
 mixed success instead of the partial failure that it so 
 often appears. If we would only look on past mis- 
 takes in the right spirit — in the spirit of humility, 
 and with a desire to learn from past errors — it would 
 be well ; but the error men make in this review is in 
 attributing the failures to circumstances instead of to 
 character. They see the mistakes which lie on the 
 surface, but fail to trace them back to the source 
 from whence they spring. The truth is, that even 
 trifling circumstances are the occasions for bringing 
 out the predominant traits of character. They are 
 tests of the nature and quality of the man rather 
 than the causes of future success or failure. 
 
 None can tell how weighty may be the results of 
 even trivial actions, nor how much of the future is 
 bound up in our every-day decisions. Chances are 
 lost, opportunities wasted, advisers ill-chosen, and 
 disastrous speculations undertaken, but there is noth- 
 ing properly accidental in these steps. They are to 
 be regarded as the results of unbalanced characters, 
 as much as the cause of future misery. The dispo- 
 sition of mind that led to these errors would certainly, 
 under other circumstances, have led to different, but 
 not less lamentable results. 
 
 We see clearly in judging others. We attribute 
 
 their mischances without compunction to the faults 
 
 we see in them, and sometimes even make cruel 
 
 mistakes in our investigation ; but in reviewing our 
 
 36 
 
562 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 own course self draws a veil over our imperfections, 
 and we persuade ourselves that mistakes or unfortu- 
 nate circumstances are the entire cause of all our 
 misfortunes. It is true that no circumstances are 
 always favorable, no training perfectly judicious, no 
 friend wholly wise, yet he who is always shifting the 
 blame of his failures upon these external causes is 
 the very man who has the most reason to trace them 
 to his own inherent weakness or demerits. 
 
 It is questionable whether the habit of looking 
 much at mistakes, even of our own, is a very profita- 
 ble one. It might be rendered of use were we only 
 to do so in the proper spirit. Certainly the practice 
 of mourning over and bewailing them, and charging 
 upon them all the evils that afflict us, is the most 
 injurious to our future course, and the greatest hin- 
 drance to any real improvement of character. Act- 
 ing from impulse, and not from reason, is one of the 
 chief causes of these mistakes ; and if any would 
 avoid them in the future they must test all their 
 sudden impulses by the searching and penetrating 
 ordeal of their best judgment before acting upon 
 them. Above all, the steady formation of virtuous 
 habits, the subjection of all actions to principles 
 rather than to policy, the firm and unyielding ad- 
 herence to duty, as far as it is known, are the best 
 safeguards against mistakes in life. 
 
 Who lives that has not, during his life, aspired to 
 something that he was unable to reach? The sor- 
 rows of mankind may all be traced to blighted hopes ; 
 like frost upon the green leaves comes the chilling 
 
FAILURE. 563 
 
 conviction that our hopes are forever dead. We may 
 live, but he who has placed his whole mind on the 
 attainment of some object and fails to reach it, life 
 to him seems a burden — a weary burden. To youth 
 blighted hopes come like the cold dew of evening 
 upon the flowers. The sun next morning banishes 
 the dew, and the flower is brighter and purer from 
 its momentary affliction. Sorrow purifies the heart 
 of youth as the rain purifies the growing plant. But 
 to the man of mature years the blighting of cherished 
 hopes falls with a chilling effect. 'T is hard to pro- 
 ceed as though nothing had happened — to cheerfully 
 take up life's load, yet such is the course of true 
 manhood; this is the inheritance of life — the test of 
 character. 
 
 Our world presents a strangely different aspect 
 according to the different moods in which it is viewed. 
 To him whose efforts have been crowned with success 
 it is superlatively beautiful ; to him whose life has 
 known no care it appears to be filled with all manner 
 of comfortable things ; to those who pine in sickness 
 and suffering, the unfortunate, and those whose ef- 
 forts have ended only in failure, it most truthfully 
 seems to be "a vale of tears," and human life itself 
 a bubble raised from those tears and inflated with 
 sighs, which, after floating a little while, decked, it 
 may be, with a few gaudy colors from the hand of 
 fortune, is at last touched by the hand of death, 
 and dissolves. 
 
 He who has a stout heart will do stout-hearted 
 actions — actions which, however unconscious the doer 
 
564 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 may be of the fact, can not fail to have something of 
 immortality in their essence — something that in all 
 coming time will preserve alive their memory long 
 after the valiant doer has lain in dust. Such a man 
 will not be daunted by difficulties. Opposition will 
 but serve as fuel to the fire which feeds the spirit 
 of self-reliance within him, stimulating him to still 
 greater efforts, and, in fact, creating opportunities 
 for them. And though, in the nature of things, fail- 
 ure must often be his portion, still they will nerve 
 him anew for the struggles of active life, and endow 
 him with courage to meet the further disappointments 
 which past experience will have taught him are likely 
 to be his lot. 
 
 Neither will he, in his efforts to attain some great 
 end, to bring to happy accomplishment some noble 
 work, be daunted by the reflection that he can never 
 be sure of success even in enterprises springing 
 from the highest motives and steadfastly pursued at 
 the cost of all that is dearest. To him it will suffice 
 that the end he has in view is the right one, and 
 that if he is not destined to accomplish it eventually 
 it must triumph. With prophetic eye he looks for- 
 ward to the dawning of the time when, long after he 
 has been called hence, posterity shall enter into his 
 labor and eat of the fruit of the tree that he has 
 planted. 
 
DESPONDENCY. 565 
 
 "The darkest day, 
 Live till to-morrow, will have passed away." 
 
 ?m-s 
 
 SPHERE are dark hours that mark the history of 
 B 6 ~% the brightest years. For not a whole month 
 
 ' f ( in any one of the thousand of the past, per- 
 haps, has the sun shone brilliantly all the time. 
 And there have been cold and stormy days in every 
 year, and yet the mists and shadows of the darkest 
 hours were dissipated and flitted heedlessly away. 
 In the wide world also we have the overshadowing 
 of dark hours. There were hours of despondency 
 when Shakespeare thought himself no poet and 
 Raphael no painter, when the greatest wits doubted 
 the excellence of their happiest efforts. 
 
 But we have also bright days to offset the sad 
 ones. Though there are the dark ones, when the 
 fire will neither burn on our hearths nor our hearts, 
 and all without and within is dismal and dark, there 
 come days when we rejoice in the brightness of hope 
 and prosperity. It is human nature to look upon 
 only the bright and cheery scenes of life, to forget 
 its trials and storms in the light of the present. But 
 let us not forget that there will come other moments, 
 when the eye will be less calm, the cheek less bright, 
 and the tongue less silent; the brain will be full of 
 imaginings, pensive and sad, its inmost springs less 
 elastic and buoyant. 
 
566 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 Despondency too long continued gives place to 
 despair. No calamity can produce such a paralysis 
 of the mind. It is the capstone of the climax of 
 human misery. The mental powers are frozen with 
 indifference, the heart becomes ossified with melan- 
 choly, the soul is shrouded in a cloud of gloom. 
 Xo words of consolation, no cheerful repartee can 
 break the death-like calm ; no love can warm the 
 pent-up heart, no sunbeam dispel the dark cloud. 
 Time may effect a change ; death will break the 
 monotony. We can extend our kindness, but can 
 not relieve the victim. We may trace the cause of 
 this awful disease ; God only can effect a cure. We 
 may speculate upon its nature, but can not feel its 
 force until its iron hand is laid upon us. We may 
 call it weakness, but can not prove or demonstrate 
 the proposition. We may call it folly, but can point 
 to no frivolity to sustain our position. We may call it 
 madness, but can discover no maniac action. We 
 may call it stubborness, but can see no exhibition of 
 indocility. We may call it lunacy, but can not per- 
 ceive the incoherence of that unfortunate condition. 
 We can properly call it nothing but dark, gloomy 
 despair, an inexpressible numbness of all the sensi- 
 bilities rendering a man happy. 
 
 It is, indeed, a happy providence that has given to 
 mankind the bright, shining sun of hope to dispel 
 the gloom of despondency. We have all seen the 
 sun burst from behind the clouds and light up a 
 storm-swept landscape. Even so, when the hand of 
 misfortune has darkened our brightest prospects and 
 
DESPONDENCY. 567 
 
 swept away our sunlit dreams of future happiness, 
 has some unseen monitor inspired our drooping spirit 
 with hope and bid us struggle on ; and as we look 
 forward into the future fancy points us to a brighter 
 day's dawning. When the soul is often bowed down 
 with the weight of its own sorrows and the heart is 
 well-nigh crushed, even then some faint glimmering 
 of a happier future steals upon it like a rainbow 
 of light. 
 
 It is to be feared that many do not as resolutely 
 fight against fits of despondency as they might. 
 Many fits of the blues need but to be resolutely 
 contended against, and they will disappear ; harbored, 
 they will grow into despondency and despair. It is 
 worth while to remember that fortune is like the 
 skies in April, sometimes clouded and sometimes 
 clear and favorable, and it would be folly to de- 
 spair of again seeing the sun because to-day is 
 stormy. So it is equally unwise to sink into de- 
 spondency when fortune frowns, since in the common 
 course of things she may be surely expected to smile 
 again. 
 
 Life is a warfare, and he who easily desponds de- 
 serts a double duty — he betrays the noblest property 
 of man, his dauntless resolution, and he rejects the 
 providence of God, who guides and rules the uni- 
 verse. There is but one way of looking at fate — 
 whatever that may be, whether blessings or afflic- 
 tions — to behave with dignity under both. We must 
 not lose heart, or it will be the worse, both for 
 ourselves and for those whom we love. To struggle, 
 
568 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 and again and again to renew the conflict — this is 
 life's inheritance. 
 
 Do not, then, allow yourself to sink into despond- 
 ency. Man is born a hero, and it is only by darkness 
 and storms that heroism gains its greatest and best 
 development and illustrations ; then it kindles the 
 black cloud into a blaze of glory, and the storm 
 bears it to its destiny. Despair not, then. Morti- 
 fying failures may attend this effort and that one, but 
 only be honest and struggle on, and it will all work 
 out right in the end. Do not make the mistake, 
 either, of supposing that despondency is a state of 
 humility ; on the contrary, it is the vexation and de- 
 spair of a cowardly pride ; nothing is worse ; whether 
 we stumble or whether we fall, we must only think 
 of rising again, and going on in our course. 
 
 Do your work, then; only let it be a noble one. 
 Be faithful to your trust. If you have but one talent 
 improve it ; do not bury it in the earth because you 
 have not ten. Toil steadily and hopefully on, for life 
 is too short to admit of delay or despondency. Let 
 those who are in sorrow remember that deliverance 
 may be coming, though they see it not. Your days 
 may wear more gold in the morning, and more at 
 night, though the midday be full of snow. God 
 may be gracious, though he comes to us robed in 
 darkness and clothed in storms. It is a journey of 
 release towards the Spring when Winter is coldest 
 and darkest. Despondency is but the shadow of too 
 much happiness thrown by our spirits upon the 
 sunshiny side of life. Look up, and God will give 
 
DESPONDENCY. 569 
 
 you a song in your heart instead of a tear in 
 your eye. 
 
 Causeless depression of spirits is not to be rea- 
 soned with, nor can even David's harp charm it away 
 by sweet discoursings. As well fight with the mists 
 as with this shapeless, undefinable, yet all-beclouding, 
 hopelessness. Yet we are familiar with many such 
 instances in practical, every-day life. Many who 
 have much to be thankful for are full of complaint. 
 Such disposition is no less unfortunate than it is 
 reprehensible. They make miserable not only their 
 own life, but also the lives of those with whom they 
 are in daily contact. No doubt the one given over 
 to causeless melancholy feels a full weight of sorrow, 
 and those who laugh at his grief, could they but ex- 
 perience it, would quickly be sobered into compassion. 
 What is wanted is a firm reliance on Providence, and 
 a determination to do your duty ; then go forward 
 bravely and cheerfully, resolutely fight against this 
 disposition. Your life will be much happier. 
 
 The trouble is, that many of us, when we are 
 under any affliction, are troubled with a certain ma- 
 licious melancholy. We only dwell and pore upon 
 the sad and dark occurrences of Providence, but 
 never take notice of the more benign and bright 
 ones. Our way in this world is, like a walk under a 
 row of trees, checkered with light and shade, and, 
 because we can not all along walk in the sunshine, 
 we, therefore, perversely fix upon the darker pas- 
 sages, and so lose all the comfort of the cheering 
 ones. We are like frow/ird children, who, if you 
 
570 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 take one of their playthings from them, throw away 
 all the rest in spite. What a pitiable confession is 
 this of human weakness ! Let us, then, strive against 
 such a spirit of despondency. Even when the way 
 before us is both dark and dreary it still is worse 
 than useless to give way to despondency. Think 
 not that you are forsaken ; you have much still to 
 make life enjoyable. Energy and proper application 
 may recover what you have lost ; take heart ; pluck 
 up courage ; give not over to despondency ; by res- 
 olutely confronting the evils of life they will lose their 
 force. 
 
 SfcXtiftf. 
 
 " Faith is the subtle chain 
 That binds us to the infinite; the voice 
 Of a deep life within, that will remain 
 Until we crowd it thence." 
 
 || A IT H is the true prophet of the soul, and ever 
 beholds a spiritual life, spiritual relations, la- 
 
 bors, and joys. Its office is to teach man that 
 he is a spiritual being, that he has an inward 
 life enshrined in this material encasement — an 
 immortal gem set now in an earthly casket. It as- 
 sures man that he lives not for this life alone, but for 
 another superior to this, more glorious and real. 
 It teaches that God is a spirit, and seeks to wor- 
 ship him as such. It dignifies humanity with immor- 
 
FAITH. 571 
 
 tality. It dwells ever upon an unseen world, an- 
 nouncing always that unseen realities are eternal. 
 
 A living, active faith is not only a necessity, if 
 we would reap great good, but it is so founded on 
 the nature of things that it is natural for men to 
 have a faith in the promises of others, It is only 
 from experience that the little child learns to distrust 
 others. Then, there is the faith in one's own powers. 
 This is as necessary a form of faith as any, and 
 where not allowed to degenerate into egotism is a 
 most beneficent form of faith. Its true foundation is 
 the same as any faith ; that is, reliance on God's 
 promises. "As ye sow, so shall ye reap." Hence, 
 relying on this, and putting forth the necessary exer- 
 tions, why not confidently expect a fulfillment of the 
 promise ? This is the germ of all true self-reliance. 
 
 A true faith we can somehow reach all through 
 life, and it will brino- to the soul a rich meed of con- 
 solation, even in the shades of life. We can cherish 
 a sure hope about our future and the future of those 
 that belonor to us — a sunny, eao-er onlooking toward 
 the fulfillment of all the promises God has written 
 on our nature. We should have faith in the ulti- 
 mate triumph of the good and the true. It is quite 
 the fashion of the times to lament over the deeener- 
 acy of the present, and to think of the palmy day 
 long since past. We have indeed read history to 
 but little account do we not realize that the world is 
 growing better, and feel confident of the ultimate 
 triumph of the forces of good. 
 
 Life grows darker as we go on. till only one pure 
 
572 GOLDEN OEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 light is left shining on it, and that is faith. Old age, 
 like solitude and sorrow, has its revelations. It is 
 then that we perceive the hollowness and emptiness 
 of many of the bubbles we have been pursuing. 
 Fortunate is he who in that hour can rest down on 
 the promise of God with a steadfast faith. When 
 in your last hour all faculty in your broken spirit 
 shall fade away, and sink into inanity — imagination, 
 thought, effort, enjoyment, all fade away — then will 
 the flower of belief, which blossoms even in the 
 night, remain to refresh you with its fragrance in the 
 last darkness. 
 
 Morality as a guiding light to man sometimes 
 conduces to noble ends. It is sometimes so resplen- 
 dent as to make a man walk through life amid glory 
 and acclamation ; but it is apt to burn very dimly and 
 low when carried into the " valley of the shadow of 
 death." But faith is like the evening star, shining 
 into our souls, the more gloomy is the night of death 
 in which they sink. Surrounded by friends and the 
 comforts of life, morality appears sufficient ; but when 
 the storms of life blow upon us, then we see how 
 necessary to us is a faith in God's Word and his 
 promises. Its light only is capable of dispelling the 
 gloom of our surroundings. 
 
 Never yet did there exist a full faith which did 
 not expand the intellect while it purified the heart, 
 which did not multiply the aims and objects of the 
 understanding while it fixed and simplified those of 
 the desires and passions. Faith often builds in the 
 dungeon and lazar-house its sublimest shrine, and 
 
FAITH. 573 
 
 up through roofs of stone, that shut out the eye of 
 heaven, ascends the ladder of prayer, where the angels 
 glide to and fro. Faith is the key that unlocks the 
 cabinet of God's treasures, the messenger from the 
 celestial world to bring all the supplies that we need. 
 It converses with angels and antedates the hymns of 
 glory. To every man this grace is certain that there 
 are glories for him if he walks by faith and perseveres 
 in duty. Faith is a homely, private capital, as there 
 are public savings-banks and poor funds, out of which 
 in times of need we can relieve the necessities of 
 individuals ; so here the faithful take their coin 
 in peace. 
 
 A Christian builds his fortitude on a better foun- 
 dation than stoicism. He is pleased with every 
 thing that happens, because he knows it could not 
 have happened unless it first pleased God, and that 
 which pleases him must be the best. He is assured 
 that no new thing can befall him, and that he is in 
 the hands of a Father who will prove him with no 
 affliction that resignation can not conquer or that 
 death can not cure. In the darkest night faith sees 
 a star, in the times of greatest need finds a helping 
 hand, and in the times of sorest trouble hears a 
 sympathizing voice. 
 
 Judge not a man by his outward manifestation of 
 faith, for some there are who tremblingly reach out 
 shaking hands to the guidance of faith ; others who 
 stoutly venture in the dark their human confidence, 
 the leader which they mistake for faith ; some whose 
 hope totters upon crutches; others who stalk into 
 
574 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 futurity upon stilts. Faith is not an exotic that grows 
 in but one clime. The snows of an eternal Winter can 
 not quench its fire, neither can the glow of a tropical 
 sun destroy its life and freshness. In the palace 
 of the king or the hut of the peasant, in the homes 
 of the rich or the cabins of the poor it emits its fra- 
 grance with equal powers to please. It is as neces- 
 sary to the learned as to the ignorant, and comforts 
 alike the declining years of the sage and him who 
 never knew the value of education. 
 
 As the flower is before the fruit, so is faith before 
 good works. He who has strong faith will show his 
 faith by his works. If he has faith in himself he 
 shows it by ambitious plans, resolves, and endeavors. 
 A true faith is necessary to enable us to make the 
 most of life and its possibilities. We need a faith 
 in our fellow-men. In all the ordinary business 
 transactions we must exercise this virtue or accom- 
 plish nothing. Did you ever reflect what this world 
 would be were all faith destroyed? Faith and confi- 
 dence are synonymous terms. What a wilderness 
 would this be were the confidence which exists be- 
 tween husband and wife destroyed or did not mutual 
 confidence exist between the members of the same 
 family circle ! Home would cease to be home ; family 
 ties would prove to be bonds of straw; communities 
 could not be held together ; the vast fabric of society 
 would dissolve, and smiling countries would once 
 more be the abode of savages. Too great a confi- 
 dence bespeaks a trusting simplicity suited only for 
 childish years. But an utterly incredulous nature, 
 
worship. 575 
 
 refusing to believe unless supported by the evidence 
 of his own senses, as certainly portrays the selfish, 
 narrow, and bigoted nature as that fields of waving 
 grain are proof positive of fertile soil, the shining 
 sun, and the early and later rain. 
 
 j^RAYER is the key to open the day, and the 
 bolt to shut in the night. But as the sky drops 
 the early dew and the evening dew upon the 
 grass, yet it would not spring and grow green 
 by that constant and double falling of the dew, unless 
 some great shower at certain seasons did supply the 
 rest, so the customary devotion of prayer twice a day 
 is the falling of the early and the latter dew. But if 
 you will increase and flourish in works of grace, 
 empty the great clouds sometimes, and let fall in a 
 full shower of prayer. Choose out seasons when 
 prayer shall overflow like Jordan in times of harvest. 
 Real inward devotion knows no prayer but that 
 arising from the depths of its own feeling. Perfect 
 prayer, without a spot or blemish, though not a word 
 be spoken and no phrases known to mankind be 
 uttered, always plucks the heart out of the earth, 
 and moves it softly, like a censer, to and fro beneath 
 the face of heaven. A good man's prayer will, from 
 the deepest dungeon, climb heaven's height, and 
 bring a blessing down. Prayer is the wing where- 
 
576 GOLDEN OEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 with the soul flies to heaven, and meditation the eye 
 wherewith we see God. 
 
 He that acts toward men as if God saw him, and 
 prays to God as if men heard him, although he mav 
 not obtain all that he asks, or succeed in all that he 
 undertakes, will most probably deserve to do so: 
 for, with respect to his actions toward men, however 
 much he may fail with regard to others, yet if pure 
 and good, with regard to himself and his highest in- 
 terests they can not fail. And with respect to his 
 prayers to God, though they can not make the Deity 
 more willing to ofive, ve t thev will, and must, make 
 the suppliant more worthy to receive. 
 
 Between the humble and contrite heart and the 
 Majesty of heaven there are no barriers. The only 
 password is prayer. Prayer is a shield to the sword, 
 a sacrifice to God. and a scourge to Satan. Prayer 
 has a rigfht to the word "ineffable." It is an hour 
 ot outpouring which words can not express — 01 that 
 interior speech which we do not articulate even when 
 we employ it. The very cry of distress is an invol- 
 untary appeal to that invisible Power whose aid the 
 soul invokes. Our prayer and God's mercy are like 
 two buckets in a well ; while one ascends the other 
 descends. 
 
 For the most part, we should pray rather in as- 
 piration than petition, rather by hoping than request- 
 ing ; in which spirit, also, we may breathe a devout 
 wish for a blessing on others upon occasions when it 
 might be presumptuous to beg it. Prayer is not elo- 
 quence, but earnestness ; not the definition of help- 
 
WORSHIP. 5 t t 
 
 sssness but the feeling it; not figures of speech, 
 but compunction of soul. When the heart is full, 
 when bitter thoughts come crowding thickly up for 
 
 And the poor common words of court - 
 are such a very mockery, how much the bursting 
 heart may relieve itself in prayer ! 
 
 The dullest observer must be sensible of the 
 order and serenity prevalent in those households 
 where the occasional exercise of a beautiful form of 
 
 ship in the morning gives, as it were, the key- 
 note to every temper for the day, and attunes every 
 spirit to harmony. Family worship embodies a hal- 
 lowing influence that pleads for its observance. It 
 must needs be that trials will enter a household. 
 The conflict of wishes, the clashing of views, and a 
 thousand other causes, will ruffle the temper, and 
 produce jar and friction in the machinery of the 
 ly. 
 
 There is needed some daily agency that shall 
 softly enfold the homestead with its hallowed, sooth- 
 ing power, and restore the fine harmonious play of 
 its various parts. The father needs that which shall 
 gently lift away from his thoughts the disquieting 
 burden of his daily business ; the mother, which will 
 smooth down the fretting irritation of her unceasing 
 toil and trial ; and the child and domestic, that which 
 shall neutralize the countless agencies of evil that 
 
 r beset them. And what so well adapted to do 
 this as, when the day is done, to gather around the 
 holy page, and pour a united supplication and ac- 
 knowledgment to that sleepless Power whose protec- 
 
 37 
 
578 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 tion and security are ever around their path, and who 
 will bring all things at last into judgment ? 
 
 And when darker and sadder days begin to 
 shadow the home, what can cheer and brighten the 
 sinking heart so finely as this daily resort to the 
 fatherly One, who can make the tears of the lowliest 
 sorrow to be the seed-pearls of the brightest crown ? 
 The mind is thus expanded, the heart softened, sen- 
 timents refined, passions subdued, hopes elevated, 
 and pursuits ennobled. The greatest want of our 
 intellectual and moral nature is here met, and home 
 education becomes impregnated with the spirit and 
 elements of our preparation for eternity. 
 
 The custom of having family prayers is held in 
 honor wherever there is real Christian life, and it is 
 the one thing which more than any other knits to- 
 gether the loose threads of a home, and unites its 
 various members before God. The religious service 
 in which parents, children, and friends daily join in 
 praise and prayer is at once an acknowledgment of 
 dependence on the Heavenly Father and a renewal 
 of consecration to his work in the world. The Bible 
 is read, the hymn is sung, the petition is offered, and 
 unless all has been done as a mere formality and 
 without hearty assent, those who have gathered at 
 the family altar leave it helped, soothed, strengthened, 
 and armored as they were not before they met there. 
 The sick and the absent are remembered, the tempted 
 and the tried are commended to God, and, as the 
 Israelites in the desert were attended by the pillar 
 and cloud, so in life's wilderness the family who 
 
worship. 579 
 
 inquire of the Lord are constantly overshadowed 
 by his presence and love. 
 
 We, ignorant of ourselves, may ask in prayer for 
 what would be to our injury, which the Father denies 
 us for our own good ; so find we profit by losing of 
 our prayers. Or we may even pray for trifles, with- 
 out so much as a thought of the greatest blessings. 
 And, with sorrow be it said, we are not ashamed 
 many times to ask God for that which we should 
 blush to own to our neighbors. It is by reason of 
 the worthlessness of so many of our petitions that 
 they remain unanswered. Good prayers never come 
 creeping home. We are sure we shall receive either 
 what we ask or what we should ask. Prayer is a 
 study of truth, a sally of the soul into the infinite. 
 No man ever prayed heartily without learning some- 
 thing. 
 
 It is for the sake of man, not of God, that wor- 
 ship and prayer are required. Not that God may 
 be rendered more gracious, but that man may be 
 made better, that he may be confirmed in a proper 
 sense of his dependent state, and acquire those 
 pious and virtuous dispositions in which his highest 
 improvement consists. When we pray for any vir- 
 tues we should cultivate the virtue as well as pray 
 for it. The form of your life, every petition to God, 
 is a precept to man. Our thoughts, like the waters 
 of the sea, when exhaled toward heaven lose all their 
 bitterness and saltness, and sweeten into an amiable 
 humanity, until they descend in gentle showers of 
 love and kindness upon our fellow-men. 
 
580 GO LP EX GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 God respecteth not the arithmetic oi our pray- 
 ers, how many they are: nor the rhetoric of our 
 prayers, how neat they are; nor the geometry ot 
 our prayers, how long they are : nor the music pray- 
 ers, how melodious they are: ::or the logic pray 
 how methodical they are : but the divinity of our 
 prayers, how heart-sprung they are — not gifts, but 
 graces prevail in prayer. We should pray with as 
 much earnestness as those who expect every thing- 
 from God. and act with as much energy as those who 
 expect ever}' thing from themselves. 
 
 It is possible to have a daily worship which shall 
 be earnest, vivifying, tender and reverential, and yet 
 a weariness to nobody. Only let the one who con- 
 ducts it r>:-:: ard the Father the sweet obedience 
 of the grateful child, and maintain the attitude of 
 one who goes about earthly affairs with a soul look- 
 ing beyond and above them to the rest that remaineth 
 in heaven. It is not every one who is able to pray in 
 the hearing of ethers with ease. The timid tongue 
 falters, and the thoughts struggle in vain for utter- 
 ance. But who is there who can not read a psalm 
 or a chapter or a cluster oi verses, and kneeling 
 reoeat in accents of tender trust the Lord's prayer? 
 When we think of it that includes every thing. 
 
RELIGION. 581 
 
 
 IpfjELIGION is the moral link that binds man most 
 ^-^ closely with his God — the spiritual garden where 
 '£% the creature walks in companionship with his 
 $> Maker. This sentiment is the highest that man 
 is capable of cherishing, since it binds him to a being 
 fitted as no other being is to impart to the soul the 
 highest moral grandeur that created beings can en- 
 joy. It is the upper window of the soul, which opens 
 into the clear, radiant light of God's eternal home. 
 Its influence in every department of the mind is 
 salutary and holy ; no faculty can rise to its most 
 exalted state without the sanctifying power of this 
 sentiment. Neglect it not ; the highest beauties of 
 your souls, the finishing touch of your character, the 
 sweetest charm of your life, will be given by due 
 attention to this, your first and last duty. 
 
 If men have been termed pilgrims, and life a 
 journey, then we may add that the Christian pil- 
 grimage far surpasses all others in the following 
 important particulars: In the goodness of the road; 
 in the beauty of the prospect ; in the excellence of 
 the company, and in the rich rewards waiting the 
 traveler at the journey's end. All who have been 
 great and good without Christianity would have been 
 much greater and better with it. True religion is 
 the poetry of the heart ; it has enchantment, useful 
 to our manners ; it gives us both happiness and 
 virtue. 
 
582 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 True religion hath in it nothing weak, nothing 
 sad, nothing constrained. It enlarges the heart, is 
 simple, free, and attractive. It enables us to bear 
 the sorrows of life, and it lessens the pangs of death. 
 It is the coronet by -token of which God makes you 
 a princess in his family and an heir to his brightest 
 glories, the sweetest pleasures, the noblest privileges, 
 and the brightest honors of his kingdom. It is a 
 star which beams the brighter in heaven the darker 
 on earth grows the night. 
 
 When the rising sun shed its rays on Memnon's 
 statue it awakened music in the heart of stone. Re- 
 ligion does the same with nature. Without religion 
 you are a wandering star. You are a voiceless bird. 
 You are a motionless brook. The strings of your 
 heart are not in tune with the chords which the 
 Infinite hand sweeps as he evolves the music of the 
 universe. Your being does not respond to the touch 
 of Providence, and if beauty and truth and goodness 
 come down to you like angels out of heaven and sing 
 you their sweetest songs, you do not see their wings, 
 nor recognize their home and parentage. 
 
 True religion and virtue give a cheerful and happy 
 turn to the mind, admit of all real joys, and even 
 procure for us the highest pleasures. While it seems 
 to have no other object than the felicity of another 
 life it constitutes the chief happiness of the present. 
 There are no principles but those of religion to be 
 depended on in cases of real distress, and these are 
 able to encounter the worst emergencies and to bear 
 us up under all the changes and chances to which 
 
RELIGION. 583 
 
 our life is subject. The difficulties of life teach us 
 wisdom, its vainglories humility, its calumnies pity, 
 its hopes resignation, its sufferings charity, its afflic- 
 tions fortitude, its necessities prudence, its brevity 
 the value of time, and its dangers and uncertainties 
 a constant dependence upon a higher and all-protect- 
 ing power. 
 
 All natural results are spontaneous. The diamond 
 sparkles without effort, and the flowers open natu- 
 rally beneath the Summer rain. Religion is also a 
 natural thing — as spontaneous as it is to weep, to 
 love, or to rejoice. There is not a heart but has its 
 moments of longing — yearning for something better, 
 nobler, holier, than it knows now ; this bespeaks the 
 religious aspiration of every heart. Genius without 
 religion is only a lamp on the outer gate of a palace. 
 It may serve to cast a gleam of light on those that 
 are without, while the inhabitant sits in darkness. 
 
 Religion is not proved and established by logic. 
 It is, of all the mysteries of nature and the human 
 mind, the most mysterious and most inexplicable. It 
 is of instinct, and not of reason. It is a matter of 
 feeling, and not of opinion. Religion is placing the 
 soul in harmony with God and his laws. God is the 
 perfect supreme soul, and your souls are made in the 
 image of his, and, like all created things, are subject 
 to certain mutable laws. The transgression of these 
 laws damages your souls — warps them, stunts their 
 growth, outrages them. 
 
 You can only be manly or attain to a manly 
 growth by preserving your true relations and strict 
 
584 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 obedience to the laws of your being. God has given 
 you appetites, and he meant that they should be to 
 you a source of happiness, but always in a way 
 which shall not interfere with your spiritual growth 
 and development. He gave you desires for earthly 
 happiness. He planted in you the love of human 
 praise, enjoyment of society, the faculty of finding hap- 
 piness in all of his works. He gave you his works 
 to enjoy, but you can only enjoy them truly when 
 you regard them as blessings from the great Giver 
 to feed, and not starve, your higher nature. There 
 is not a true joy in life which you are required to 
 deprive yourself of in being faithful to him and his 
 laws. Without obedience to law your soul can not 
 be healthful, and it is only to a healthful soul that 
 pleasure comes with its natural, its divine, aroma. 
 
 Some well-meaning Christians tremble for their 
 salvation, because they have never gone through that 
 valley of tears and of sorrow which they have been 
 taught to consider as an ordeal that must be passed 
 through before they can arrive at regeneration. We 
 can but think that such souls mistake the nature of 
 religion. The slightest sorrow for sins is sufficient 
 if it produces amendment, but the greatest is insuf- 
 ficient if it do not. By their own fruits let them prove 
 themselves, for some soils will take the good seed 
 without being watered by tears or harrowed up by 
 afflictions. 
 
 There are three modes of bearing the ills of life — 
 by indifference, which is the most common ; by phi- 
 losophy, which is the most ostentatious ; and by 
 
RELIGION. 585 
 
 religion, which is the most effectual. It has been 
 said, " Philosophy readily triumphs over past or 
 future evils, but that present evils triumph over 
 philosophy." Philosophy is a goddess whose head is, 
 indeed, in heaven, but whose feet are upon earth; 
 attempts more than she accomplishes and promises 
 more than she performs. She can teach us to hear 
 of the calamities of others with magnanimity, but it 
 is religion only that can teach us to bear our own 
 with resignation. 
 
 Whoever thinks of life as something that could 
 exist in its best form without religion is in ignorance 
 of both. Life and religion is one, or neither is any 
 thing. Religion is the good to which all things 
 tend; which gives to life all its importance, to 
 eternity all its glory. Apart from religion man is 
 a shadow, his very existence a riddle, and the stu- 
 pendous scenes around him as incoherent and un- 
 meaning as the leaves which the sibyl scattered in 
 the wind. 
 
 We are surrounded by motives to religion and 
 devotion if we would but mind them. The poor are 
 designed to excite our liberality, the miserable our 
 pity, the sick our assistance, the ignorant our instruc- 
 tion, those that are fallen our helping hand. In those 
 who are vain we see the vanity of the world, in those 
 who are wicked our own frailty. When we see good 
 men rewarded it confirms our hopes, and when evil 
 men are punished it excites our fears. He that grows 
 old without religious hopes, as he declines into age, 
 and feels pains and sorrows incessantly crowding him, 
 
586 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 falls into a gulf of misery, in which every reflection 
 must plague him deeper and deeper. 
 
 It is the property of the religious spirit to be the 
 most refining of all influences. It has been termed 
 the social religion, and society is as properly the 
 sphere of all its duties, privileges, and enjoyments 
 as the ecliptic is the course of the earth. No exter- 
 nal advantage, no culture of the tastes, no habit of 
 command, no association with the elegant, or even 
 depths of affection can bestow, that delicacy and that 
 grandeur of bearing which belong only to the mind 
 which has experienced the discipline of religious 
 thought and feeling. All else, all superficial aids to 
 etiquette, manner, and refinement as expressed in 
 look and gesture, is but as gilt and cosmetic. 
 
 Your personal value depends entirely upon your 
 possession of religion. You are worth to yourself 
 what you are capable of enjoying, you are worth to 
 society the happiness you are capable of imparting. 
 A man whose aims are low, whose motives are selfish, 
 who has in his heart no adoration of God, whose will 
 is not subordinate to the supreme will, who has no 
 hope, no tenable faith in a happy immortality, no 
 strong-armed trust that with his soul it shall be well 
 in all the future, can not be worth very much to him- 
 self. Neither can such a man be worth very much 
 to society, because he has not that to bestow which 
 society most needs for its prosperity and happiness. 
 
 Christianity teaches the beauty and dignity of 
 common and private life. It makes it valuable, not 
 for the cares from which it frees us, but for the con- 
 
RELIGION. 587 
 
 stant duties through which we may train the soul to 
 perfect sympathy with the design of the Creator. 
 It shows that the humblest lot possesses opportuni- 
 ties which require the energies of the most exalted 
 virtues to meet and satisfy. It impresses upon us 
 the solemn truth that life itself, however humble its 
 condition, is always holy ; that every moment has its 
 duty and its responsibility, which Christian strength 
 alone, the crown of power, can do and bear. It 
 teaches that the simplest experience may become 
 radiant with a heavenly beauty when hallowed by a 
 spirit of constant love to God and man. 
 
 Another of the lessons of Christianity is that of 
 the inestimable worth of common duties as manifest- 
 ing the greatest principles. It bids us to attain 
 perfection, not striving to do dazzling deeds, but by 
 making our experience divine. It shows us that the 
 Christian hero will ennoble the humblest field of 
 labor, that nothing is mean which can be performed 
 as a duty, but that religion, like the touch of Midas, 
 converts the humblest call of duty into spiritual gold. 
 
588 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 30b iji Jt&EVWBi. 
 
 The day is Thine, the night also is Thine ; 
 Thou hast prepared the light and the sun ; 
 Thou hast set all the borders of the earth; 
 Thou hast made Summer and Winter." 
 
 — Psalms. 
 
 Bp|HE height of the heavens should remind us of 
 p'-yt^ the infinite distance between us and God, the 
 n brightness of the firmament of his glory, maj- 
 esty, and holiness, the vastness of the heavens 
 and their influence upon the earth, of his immensity 
 and universal providence. Hill and valley, seas and 
 constellations are but stereotypes of divine ideas, 
 appealing to and answered by the living soul of man. 
 The works of nature and the works of revelation dis- 
 play religion to mankind in characters so large and 
 visible that those who are not quite blind may in 
 them see and read the first principles and most nec- 
 essary parts of religion, and from thence penetrate 
 into those infinite depths filled with the treasures of 
 wisdom and knowledge. 
 
 God writes the Gospel not in the Bible alone, 
 but on trees and flowers and clouds and stars. All 
 nature, in short, speaks in language plain to be un- 
 derstood of the majesty and power of its Author. 
 Nature is man's religious book, with lessons for 
 every day. Nature is the chart of God, marking out 
 all his attributes. A man finds in the production of 
 nature an inexhaustible stock of materials upon which 
 he can employ himself without any temptation to 
 
GOD IN NATURE. 589 
 
 envy or malevolence, and has always a certain pros- 
 pect of discovering new reasons for adoring the sov- 
 ereign Author of the universe. What profusion is 
 there in his work ! When trees blossom, there is 
 not simply one, but a whole collection of gems ; and 
 of leaves, they have so many that they can throw 
 them away to the winds all Summer long. What 
 unnumbered cathedrals has he reared in the forest 
 shades, vast and grand, full of curious carvings, and 
 haunted evermore by tremulous music ; and in the 
 heavens above, how do stars seem to have flown out 
 of his hand faster than sparks out of a mighty forge ! 
 
 These insignia of wisdom and power are im- 
 pressed upon the works of God, which distinguishes 
 them from the feeble imitation of men. Not only 
 the splendor of the sun, but the glimmering light of 
 the glow-worm, proclaim his glory. God has placed 
 nature by the side of man as a friend, who remains 
 always to guide and console him in life ; as a pro- 
 tecting genius, who conducts him, as well as all spe- 
 cies, to a harmonious unity with himself. The earth 
 is the material bosom which bears all the races. 
 Nature arouses man from the sleep in which he 
 would remain without thought of himself, inspires 
 him with noble designs, and preserves thus in human- 
 ity activity ^and life. 
 
 The best of all books is the book of nature. It 
 is full of variety, interest, novelty, and instruction. 
 It is ever open before us. It invites us to read, and 
 all that it requires of us is the will to do it ; with 
 eyes to see, with ears to hear, with hearts and souls 
 
590 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 to feel, and with minds and understandings to com- 
 prehend. Infinite intelligence was required to com- 
 pose this mighty volume, which never fails to impart 
 the highest wisdom to those who peruse it attent- 
 ively and rightly, with willing hearts and humble 
 minds. Nature has perfection, in order to show that 
 she is the image of God ; and defects, in order to 
 show that she is only his image. 
 
 The study of nature must ever lead to true re- 
 ligion ; hence let there be no fear that the issues 
 of natural science shall be skepticism or anarchy. 
 Through all God's works there runs a beautiful har- 
 mony. The remotest truth in his universe is linked 
 to that which lies nearest the throne. It has been 
 said that "an undevout astronomer is mad." With 
 still greater force might it be said that he who attent- 
 ively studies nature and fails to see in her ways 
 the workings of Providence must, indeed, be blind. 
 Who the guide of nature, but only the God of 
 nature ? In him we live, move, and have our being. 
 Those things which nature is said to do are by 
 divine art performed, using nature as an instrument. 
 Nor is there any such divine knowledge working in 
 nature herself, but in the guide of nature's work. 
 
 Examine what department of nature that we will, 
 we are speedily convinced of an intelligent plan 
 running throughout all the works, which eloquently 
 proclaims a divine author. In the rock-ribbed strata 
 of the earth we can read as intelligently as though 
 it were written on parchment the story of the crea- 
 tion. And what so interesting as this rock-written 
 
GOD IN NATURE. 591 
 
 history of the world slowly fitting for mankind ? 
 Read of the coal stored away for future use ; of 
 whole continents plowed by glaciers, and made 
 fertile for man. Think of the aeons of ages that 
 this earth swung in space, all the types of creation 
 prophecying of the coming of man! Who can pon- 
 der these o'er without coming to the belief of an 
 author and finisher of all this glory? Thus does a 
 devout study of nature discover to us the God of 
 nature. 
 
 Go stand upon the heights at Niagara, and listen 
 in awe-struck silence to that boldest, most earnest, 
 and most eloquent of all nature's oracles! And what 
 is Niagara, with its plunging waters and its mighty 
 roar, but the oracle of God — the whisper of his voice 
 is revealed in the Bible as sitting above the water- 
 floods forever! Or view the stupendous scenery of 
 Alpine countries, and there, amid rock and snow, 
 overlooking the valleys below, we feel a sense of 
 the presence of Divinity. Or, wandering on ocean 
 beach, watching the play of the waves, or listening 
 to the roar of the breakers, our hearts are impressed 
 with a sense of the power and majesty of God. In 
 short, wherever we contemplate the vast or wonderful 
 in nature, there we experience a religious exaltation 
 of spirit. It is the soul within us placing itself en 
 rapport with the soul of nature, the great first cause. 
 
 Go stand upon the Areopagus of Athens, where 
 Paul stood so long ago. In thoughtful silence look 
 around upon the site of all that ancient greatness ; 
 look upward to those still glorious skies of Greece, 
 
592 GOLDEN OEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 and what conceptions of wisdom and power will all 
 those memorable scenes of nature and art convey to 
 your mind, now more than they did to an ancient 
 worshiper of Jupiter and Apollo! They will tell 
 of Him who made the worlds, "by whom, through 
 whom, and for whom are all things." To you that 
 landscape of exceeding beauty, so rich in the monu- 
 ments of departed genius, with its distant classic 
 mountains, its deep, blue sea, and its bright, bending 
 skies will be telling a tale of glory that the Grecian 
 never learned ; for it will speak to you no more of 
 its thousand contending deities, but of the one living 
 and everlasting God. 
 
 efe 
 
 u&m BIBKEl. 
 
 |HE Bible is a book whose words live in the ear 
 
 £™| like music that can never be forgotten, like the 
 ' ij sound of church-bells, which the convert hardly 
 knows how he can forego. Its felicities often 
 seem to be things rather than mere words. It is a 
 part of the national mind, and the anchor of national 
 seriousness. The memory of the dead passes into 
 it ; the potent traditions of childhood are stereotyped 
 in its verses. The power of all the griefs and trials 
 of man is hidden beneath its words. It is the repre- 
 sentative of his best moments, and all that has been 
 around him of the highest and best speaks to him 
 out of his Bible. 
 
THE BIBLE. 593 
 
 The Bible is the oldest surviving monument of 
 the springtime of the human intellect. It reveals to 
 us the character and intellect of our great Creator 
 and Final Judge. It opens before us the way of sal- 
 vation through a Redeemer, unveils to our view the 
 invisible world, and shows us the final destiny of our 
 race. God's Word is, in fact, much like God's world, 
 varied, very rich, very beautiful. You never know 
 when you have exhausted all its merits. The Bible, 
 like nature, has something for every class of minds. 
 Look at the Bible in a new light, and straightway you 
 see some new charm. The Bible goes equally to the 
 cottage of the poor man and the palace of the king. 
 It is woven into literature, and it colors the talk of 
 the street. The bark of the merchant can not sail to 
 sea without it. No ship of war goes to the conflict 
 but the Bible is there. It enters men's closets, min- 
 gling in all the grief and cheerfulness of life. 
 
 The Bible is adapted to every possible variety of 
 taste, temperament, culture, and condition. It has 
 strong reasoning for the intellectual. It takes the 
 calm and contemplative to the well-balanced James, 
 and the affectionate to the loving and beloved John. 
 Not only is this book precious to the poor and un- 
 learned, not only is it the consoler of the great middle 
 class of society, both spiritually and mentally speak- 
 ing, but the scholar and the sage, the intellectual 
 monarch of the age, bow to its authority. 
 
 To multitudes of our race it is not only the foun- 
 dation of their religious faith, but it is their daily 
 
 practical guide as well. It has taken hold of the 
 
 38 
 
594 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 world as no other book ever did. Not only is it read 
 in all Christian pulpits, but it enters every habitation, 
 from the palace to the cottage. It is the golden chain 
 which binds hearts together at the marriage altar; 
 it contains the sacred formula for the baptismal rite 
 It blends itself with our daily conversation, and is the 
 silver thread of all our best reading, giving its hue, 
 more or less distinctly, to book, periodical, and daily 
 paper. On the seas it goes with the mariner as his 
 spiritual chart and compass, and on the land it is to 
 untold millions their pillar cloud by day and their fire 
 column by night. 
 
 In the closet and in the streets, amid temptation 
 and trials, this is man's most faithful attendant and 
 his strongest shield. It is our lamp through the 
 dark valley, and the radiator of our best light from 
 the solemn and unseen future. Stand before it as 
 before a mirror, and you will see there not only your 
 good traits, but your errors, follies, and sins, which 
 you did not imagine were until you thus examined 
 yourself. If you desire to make constant improve- 
 ment, go to the Bible. It not only shows the way 
 of all progress, but it incites you to go forward. It 
 opens before you a path leading up and still onward, 
 along which good angels will cheer you, and all that 
 is good will lend you a helping hand. 
 
 There is no book so well adapted to improve both 
 the head and the heart as the Bible. It is a tried 
 book. Its utility is demonstrated by experience ; its 
 necessity is confessed by all who have studied the 
 wants of human nature ; it has wrung reluctant praise 
 
THE BIBLE. 595 
 
 even from the lips of its foes. Other books bespeak 
 their own age ; the Bible was made for all ages. Un- 
 inspired authors speculate upon truths before made 
 known, and often upon delusive imaginations ; the 
 Bible reveals truths before unknown, and otherwise 
 unknowable. It is distinguished for its exact and 
 universal truth. Time and criticism only illustrate 
 and confirm its pages. Successive ages reveal noth- 
 ing to change the Bible representations of God, 
 nothing to correct the Bible representation of human 
 nature. Passing events fulfill its prophecies, but fail 
 to impeach its allegations. 
 
 The Scriptures teach us the best way of living, 
 the noblest way of suffering, and the most comfort- 
 able way of dying. A mind rightly disposed will 
 easily discover the image of God's wisdom in the 
 depths of its mysteries, the image of God's sov- 
 ereignty in the commanding majesty of its style, the 
 image of his unity in the wonderful harmony and 
 symmetry of all its parts, the image of his holiness 
 in the unspotted purity of its precepts, and the image 
 of his goodness in the wonderful tendency of the 
 whole to the welfare of mankind in both worlds. We 
 should use the Scriptures not as an arsenal, to be 
 resorted to only for arms and weapons, but as a 
 matchless temple where we delight to contemplate 
 the beauty, the symmetry, and the magnificence of 
 the structure, and to increase our awe and excite 
 our devotion to the Deity there proclaimed. 
 
 The cheerless gloom which broods over the un- 
 derstandings of men had never been chased away but 
 
596 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 for the beams of a supernatural revelation. Men 
 may look with an unfriendly eye on that system of 
 truth which reproves and condemns them ; but they 
 little know the loss the world would sustain by sub- 
 verting its foundations. We have tried paganism, 
 we have tried Mohammedanism, we have tried Deism 
 and philosophy, and we can not look upon them even 
 with respect. The Scriptures contain the only sys- 
 tem of truth which is left us. If we give up these, 
 we have no others to which we can repair. 
 
 HJ||HERE are two questions, one of which is the 
 *|ife a most important, the other the most interesting 
 flf that can be proposed in language: Are we to 
 live after death? and if we are, in what state? 
 These are questions confined to no climate, creed, or 
 community. The savage is as deeply interested in 
 them as the sage, and they are of equal import 
 under every meridian where there are men. 
 
 Among the most effectual and most beautiful 
 modes of reasoning that the universe affords for the 
 hope that is within us of a life beyond the tomb 
 there is none more beautiful or exquisite than that 
 derived from the change of the seasons, from the 
 second life that bursts forth in Spring in objects ap- 
 parently dead, and from the shadowing forth in the 
 renovation of every thing around us of that destiny 
 
FUTURE LIFE. 597 
 
 which divine revelation calls upon our faith to believe 
 shall be ours. The trees that have faded and re- 
 mained dark and gray through the long, dreary life 
 of Winter clothe themselves with again green in the 
 Spring sunshine, and every hue speaks of life. The 
 buds that were trampled down and faded burst forth 
 once more in freshness and beauty, the streams break 
 from the icy chains that held them, and the glorious 
 sun himself comes wandering from his far-off journey, 
 giving warmth to the atmosphere and renewed beauty 
 and grace to every thing around, and every thing 
 we see rekindles into life. 
 
 At all times and in all places men have contem- 
 plated the questions of death and immortatity. 
 The one is a stern reality from which they know 
 there is no escaping. Every day they see friends and 
 acquaintances drooping and dying. Their pleasure 
 drives are interrupted by the funeral cortege of 
 strangers. There is not a soul but what in reflective 
 moments has pondered the question of immortality. 
 If they see clearly under the guiding light of Chris- 
 tianity the future is full of hope to them. It matters 
 but little their present surroundings. If poverty and 
 pain be their lot, they know that rest will come to 
 them later. N ~Those who do not possess this pleasing 
 hope of immortality feel at times a painful longing, a 
 vague unrest. Philosophize as they will, the future 
 is dark and uncertain, and there are times when they 
 would willingly give all could they but see a beacon 
 light or feel the strong assurance of faith that they 
 would live again. 
 
598 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 Surely, there is tenable ground for this hope ! It 
 can not be that earth is man's only abiding place. It 
 can not be that our life is a bubble cast up by the ocean 
 of eternity to float for a moment upon its surface, and 
 then sink into nothingness and darkness forever. 
 Else why is it that the high and glorious aspirations, 
 which leap like angels from the temples of our hearts, 
 are forever wandering abroad satisfied ? Why is it 
 that the rainbow and the cloud come over us with a 
 beauty that is not of earth, and then pass off and 
 leave us to muse on their faded loveliness ? Why is 
 it that the stars which hold their festival around the 
 midnight throne are set above the grasp of our lim- 
 ited faculties, and are forever mocking us with their 
 unapproachable glory? Finally, why is it that bright 
 forms of human beauty are presented to the view, 
 and then taken from us, leaving the thousand streams 
 of affection to flow back upon our hearts? We are 
 from a higher destiny than that of earth. There is 
 a realm where the rainbow never fades, where the 
 stars will be spread out before us like the islands on 
 the bosom of the ocean, and where the beautiful 
 beings that here pass before us like visions will 
 remain with us forever. 
 
 As death approaches and earth recedes do we not 
 more clearly see that spiritual world in which we 
 have all along been living, though we knew it not? 
 The dying man tells us of attendant angels hovering 
 around him. Perchance it is no vision. They might 
 have been with him through life. They may attend 
 us all through life, only our inward eyes are dim and 
 
TIME AND ETERNITY. 599 
 
 we see them not. What is that mysterious expres- 
 sion, so holy and so strange, so beautiful yet so 
 fearful, on the countenance of one whose soul has 
 just departed? May it not be the glorious light 
 of attendant seraphs, the luminous shadow of which 
 rests awhile on the countenance of the dead? 
 
 : Why shrinks the soul 
 
 Back on herself, and startles at destruction ? 
 'Tis the divinity that stirs within us; 
 'Tis heaven itself that points out an hereafter, 
 And intimates eternity to man. 
 Eternity, thou pleasing, dreadful thought ! 
 Thro' what variety of untried being, 
 Thro' what new scenes and changes must we pass? 
 The wide, the unbounded prospect lies before me; 
 Bat shadows, clouds, and darkness rest upon it" 
 
 — Addison. 
 
 Sp|LAS ! what is man? Whether he be deprived 
 ? of that light which is from on high, or whether 
 he discards it, he is a frail and trembling crea- 
 ture, standing on time, that bleak and narrow 
 isthmus between two eternities ; he sees nothing but 
 impenetrable darkness on the one hand, and doubt, 
 distrust, and conjecture still more perplexing on the 
 other. Most gladly would he take an observation as 
 to whence he has come, or whither he is going; 
 alas ! he has not the means ; his telescope is too 
 dim, his compass too wavering, his plummet too 
 
600 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 short; nor is that little spot, his present state, one 
 whit more intelligible, since it may prove a quicksand 
 that may sink in a moment from his feet. It can* 
 afford him no certain reckonings as to that immeas- 
 urable ocean on which he must soon spread his sail 
 
 an awful expedition, from which the mind shrinks 
 from comtemplating. Nor is the gloom relieved by 
 the outfit in which the voyage must be undertaken. 
 The bark is a coffin, the destination is doubt, and 
 the helmsman is death. Faith alone can see the 
 star which is to guide him to a better land. 
 
 The hour-glass is truly emblematical of the world. 
 As its sands run out at the termination of a given 
 period, so it shows that all things must have an end. 
 It shows that man may devise — may even execute — 
 but that erelong time, that restless destroyer, comes, 
 and mows all before him, and leaves naught but a 
 wreck, a barren waste behind him. Surely all will 
 give credence to this who watch the daily dying of 
 cherished hopes, of delightful anticipations. The 
 flame burns brightly at first, but it soon fluctuates, 
 and finally dies without restriction. 
 
 We must, some time or other, enter on the last 
 year of our life ; fifty or one hundred years may yet 
 come, and the procession may seem interminable, but 
 the closing year of our life must come. There are 
 many years memorable in history, as in them died 
 men of renown ; but the year of our death will be 
 more memorable to us than any. Eighteen hun- 
 dred and fifteen was a memorable year, for in that 
 Waterloo was fought ; but there will be a more 
 
TIME AND ETERNITY. 601 
 
 memorable year for us — the year in which we fight 
 the battle with the last enemy. That year will open 
 • with the usual New-year's congratulations ; it will 
 rejoice in the same orchard blossoming, and the 
 sweet influences of Spring. It will witness the 
 golden glory of the harvest, and the merry-makings 
 of Christmas. And yet to us it will be vastly dif- 
 ferent, from the fact that it will be our closing year. 
 The Spring grass may be broken by the spade to let 
 us down to our resting-place ; or, while the Summer 
 grain is falling to the sickle, we may be harvested 
 for another world ; or, while the Autumnal leaves are 
 flying in the November gale, we may fade and fall ; 
 or, the driving sleet may cut the faces of the black- 
 tasseled horses that take us on our last ride. But 
 it will be the year in which our body and soul part — 
 the year in which, for us, time ends and eternity 
 begins. All other years fade away as nothing. The 
 year in which we were born, the year in which we 
 began business, the year in which our father died, 
 are all of them of less importance to us than the year 
 of our death. 
 
 It is only when on the border of eternity that the 
 fleeting period of life is comprehended. Human life, 
 what is it ? It is vapor gilded by a sunbeam — the 
 reflection of heaven in the waters of the earth. In 
 youth the other world seems a great way off, but 
 later we feel and realize that it is close at hand. We 
 come, like the ocean wave, to the shore, but scarcely 
 strike the strand before we roll back into forgetful- 
 ness, whence we came. 
 
602 GOLDEN OEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 In the light of eternity, how vain and foolish 
 appear the contentions and strifes of mankind ! Ad- 
 dison most beautifully expresses this thought in these 
 lines: "When I look upon the tombs of the great 
 every emotion of envy dies ; when I read the epitaph 
 of the beautiful every inordinate desire forsakes me ; 
 when I meet with the grief of parents upon a tomb- 
 stone my heart melts with compassion ; when I see 
 the tombs of the parents themselves I reflect how 
 vain it is to grieve for those we must quickly follow; 
 when I see kings lying beside those who deposed 
 them, when I see rival wits placed side by side, or 
 the holy men who divided the world with their con- 
 tests and disputes, I reflect with sorrow and aston- 
 ishment on the frivolous competitions, factions, and 
 debates of mankind." 
 
 "Old age, serene and bright, 
 And lovely as a Lapland night, 
 Shall lead thee to thy grave." 
 
 — Wordsworth. 
 
 4k> . 
 
 iHERE is a beauty. in age. The morning of 
 
 jjjjftsa iif e ma y De glowing with the expectations of 
 
 y youth; the noon may be fruitful in endeavors 
 
 and works ; but the evening of life is the time 
 
 of calm repose and holy meditation. When young 
 
 and standing where the glow of youthful hopes irra- 
 
] rti on is 1 In 
 

THE EVENING OF LIFE. 603 
 
 diates the future how natural to lay out brilliant 
 plans ! to form ambitious resolves ! How easy it 
 seems to achieve any wished-for thing! Wealth, 
 fame, or any temporal good — surely we can attain 
 them ! Experience soon shows us the futility of 
 these hopes and plans. Before many mile-stones 
 are passed in the journey of life we learn that God, 
 in his wisdom, has so apportioned trial and suffering 
 that it matters little the external surroundings ; to 
 all it is full of work and anxieties and painful scenes, 
 and that it is in struggling against these that the 
 best development of power is acquired. 
 
 It is no wonder that when once confronted by the 
 stern realities of life we should lose sight of the 
 dreams of youth. Manhood's days are the days of 
 reflection, of judgment, a wise adaptation of means 
 to the end desired, and, if but used aright, we need 
 have little occasion for regret that childhood's days 
 are passed. We are no longer children ; we are 
 men and women. We are no longer engaged in 
 childish dreams ; we are up and doing what God 
 has assigned to us. This is the period of life that 
 we would most willingly see prolonged. But time 
 stops not in his rapid flight. In vain our protests. 
 The sun as swiftly descends to its setting as it rose 
 to its noon. The form that so rapidly matured into 
 one of grace, strength, and manly attributes of char- 
 acter, is bowed by the weight of years. The elas- 
 ticity of youth gives way to the measured step and 
 careful tread of age, and on the head time sprinkles 
 his snow. 
 
604 GOLDEN OEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 It is now that the thoughts of man should assume 
 their most valued characteristics. They can muse 
 over the events of past years. They can contemplate 
 the mysteries of the future. The most momentous 
 period of life is about at hand — that time when they 
 will exchange this life for another. What age can 
 there be more important than this ? It is natural for 
 youth to regard old age as a dreary season — one 
 that admits of nothing that can be called pleasure, 
 and very little that deserves the name even of com- 
 fort. They look forward to it as in Autumn we 
 anticipate the approach of Winter, forgetting that 
 Winter, when it arrives, brings with it much of 
 pleasure. Its enjoyments are of different kinds, but 
 we find it not less pleasant than any other season of 
 the year. 
 
 In like manner age has no terror to those who see 
 it near; but experience proves that it abounds with 
 consolations, and even with delights. The world in 
 general bows down to age, gives it preference, and 
 listens with deference to its opinions. Such rever- 
 ence must be soothing to age, and compensate it 
 for the loss of many of the enjoyments of youth. 
 "The true man does not wish to be a child again." 
 In individual experience how many have wished to 
 live again the past? Could we return, and carry 
 with us our present experience, all would wish to do 
 so, but to go over the same old round we are afraid 
 that the number of those whose life has been so 
 happy that they would wish to live it over again 
 is exceedingly small. Your present experience will 
 
THE EVENING OF LIFE. 605 
 
 remain with you through life. And hence, old age, 
 as devoid of pleasure as it may appear to us now, 
 we will find that when the passage of years brings us 
 to that point we will not willingly exchange it for any 
 of the stages of life gone by. 
 
 As there is nothing unlovely in age, when once 
 at its threshold, so death, when viewed in the right 
 spirit, is found to be but the pleasant transition stage 
 to a more glorious and perfect life. From the days 
 of Plato to the present men have doubted and won- 
 dered as to the questions of immorality and its na- 
 ture. But none have approached the question in the 
 right spirit but what always the result has been 
 the same. Revelation and analogical reasoning both 
 point to the same glorious hope. What, then, shall 
 we view it with terror? Ought we not to look for- 
 ward to it longingly as the final triumph of a well- 
 lived life? Though success and fortune may have 
 been ours here, are they any thing more or less 
 than the accidental circumstances surrounding an 
 ephemeral existence? In the light of eternity does 
 it make any great difference whether that existence 
 was passed surrounded with the comforts of wealth 
 or strugging for the necessities of life? 
 
 We are all equal in death; the king and the 
 peasant, the rich and the poor are all alike in this 
 respect. Surely, that which is thus the common lot 
 of humanity must be for the common good. The 
 universal dread of death is, then, the effect of erro- 
 neous habits of thought. It is the entrance to the 
 harbor. We fear not the peaceful rest within. We 
 
606 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 can not do better, then, than to cultivate cheerful 
 thoughts in regard to age and death. The one is 
 the beautiful closing scene of earthly life, the other 
 the entrance to life immortal. 
 
 He who died at Azan sends 
 This to co7iifort all his frie7ids. 
 
 Faithful friends ! It lies, I know, 
 
 Pale and white and cold as snow; 
 
 And ye say, "Abdallah 's dead!" 
 
 Weeping at the feet and head. 
 
 I can see your falling tears, 
 
 I can hear your sighs and prayers; 
 
 Yet I smile and whisper this — 
 
 "/am not the thing you kiss: 
 
 Cease your tears and let it lie; 
 
 It was mine, it is not ' I.' " 
 
 Sweet friends! what the women lave, 
 
 For its last bed of the grave, 
 
 Is but a hut which I am quitting, 
 
 Is a garment no more fitting, 
 
 Is a cage, from which at last, 
 
 Like a hawk, my soul hath passed. 
 
 Love the inmate, not the room — 
 
 The wearer, not the garb — the plume 
 
 Of the falcon, not the bars 
 
 Which kept him from the splendid stars ! 
 
 Loving friends ! Be wise, and dry 
 Straightway every weeping eye: 
 What ye lift upon the bier 
 Is not worth a wistful tear. 
 'Tis an empty sea- shell — one 
 Out of which the pearl has gone; 
 
THE EVENING OF LIFE. £07 
 
 The shell is broken — it lies there; 
 The pearl, the all, the soul is here. 
 'Tis an earthen jar, whose lid 
 Allah sealed, the while it hid 
 The treasure of his treasury, 
 A mind that loved him ; let it lie ? 
 Let the shard be earth's once more, 
 Since the gold shines in his store ! 
 
 Allah glorious ! Allah good ! 
 Now thy world is understood; 
 Now the long, long wonder ends; 
 Yet ye weep, my erring friends, 
 While the man whom ye call dead, 
 In unspoken bliss, instead, 
 Lives and loves you; lost, 'tis true, 
 V>y such a light as shines for you; 
 But in the light ye can not see 
 Of unfulfilled felicity — 
 In enlarging paradise 
 Lives a life that never dies. 
 
 Farewell, friends ! Yet not farewell 
 
 Where I am ye, too, shall dwell. 
 
 I am gone before your face, 
 
 A moment's time, a little space; 
 
 When ye come where I have stepped 
 
 Ye will wonder why ye wept; 
 
 Ye will know, by wise love taught, 
 
 That here is ail and there is naught. 
 
 Weep awhile, if ye are fain — 
 Sunshine still must follow rain; 
 Only not at death — for death, 
 Now I know, is that first breath 
 Which our souls draw when we enter 
 Life, which is of all life center. 
 
608 GOLDEN GEMS OF LIFE. 
 
 Be ye certain all seems love, 
 
 Viewed from Allah's throne above; 
 
 Be ye stout of heart, and come 
 
 Bravely onward to your home ! 
 
 La Allah ilia Allah ! yea ! 
 
 Thou Love divine ! Thou Love alway ! 
 
 He that died at Azan gave 
 
 This to those who made his grave. 
 
 DEC 131949 
 
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