F 71* 
 CH R32 
 
 Copy 
 
 
 '■... 
 
ty 
 
 9 
 
 /SJ-, 
 
CONVENT, • 
 
 VE OP S 
 
 REBECCA THERESA REED, 
 
 WHO WAS UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF THE ROMAN CATHO- 
 LICS ABOUT TWO YEARS, AND AN INMATE 
 ^A OF THE URSULINE CONVENT ^ 
 
 *Z*S?4*Z> &£&*/^ <^&*Z 
 
 JBount 33eneMct, <£!)arlestoton, |Wass. t 
 
 NEARLY SIS. MONTHS, IN THE YEARS 1331-2. 
 
 WITH SOME PRELIMINARY SUGG ESTIONS BY 
 THE COMMITTEE OF PUBLICATION. 
 
 BOSTON : 
 RUSSELL, ODIORNE & METCALF- 
 
 NEW-YORK, NELSON HALL, JOHN ST. ; PHILADELPHIA, WILLIAM 
 
 MARSHALL AND CO. ; CINCINNATI, C. P. BARNES; AND ALL 
 
 THE PRINCIPAL EOOKSELLERS IN THE V. STATES. 
 
 1835. 
 

 * - I 
 
 
 ENTERED ACCORDING TO ACT OF CONGRESS, IN THE YEAR 
 1835, BY RUSSELL, ODIORNE AND METCALF, IN THE CLERK'S 
 OFFICE OF THE DISTRICT COURT OF MASSACHUSETTS. 
 
 Stereotyped hj Sheriard, 01i»er & Uo, 
 
PRELIMINARY SUGGESTIONS 
 FOR CANDID READERS. 
 
 It is related in the history of the Reformation, that 
 about the middle of the year 1 520, Martin Luther published 
 in his native language a little treatise, in which he ad- 
 dressed the emperor and German nobility on the necessity 
 of a reformation in the church. Some friends of Luther, 
 however, there were, who were startled at the boldness of 
 the publication, and considered it as the signal for 
 war ; but the more thinking and judicious part of mankind 
 looked on this measure as the wisest step which, even in 
 a merely worldly and prudential light, could possibly have 
 been taken to render contemptible and abortive the ex- 
 pected fulmination of the Roman court. 
 
 This little treatise was the origin of that immense move- 
 ment in public sentiment, the Protestant reform in the 
 church. No sooner was it known, than Leo X. issued 
 that famous damnatory bull against Luther, which in the 
 event proved so fatal to the established hierarchy. The 
 writings of Luther, though at that period they were of a 
 mild and persuasive character, were condemned as hereti- 
 cal, scandalous, and offensive to pious ears ; all persons 
 were forbidden to read them upon pain of excommunica- 
 tion ; such as had any in their custody were commandea to 
 burn them ; and he himself, if he did not in sixty days send 
 or bring his retraction to Rome, was pronounced an obsti- 
 nate heretic, was excommunicated, and delivered unto Sa- 
 tan for the destruction of his flesh. 
 
 We do not propose to institute a grave comparison be- 
 tween Luther's little treatise in the sixteenth century and 
 the Narrative of a six months' residence in a Convent in the 
 nineteenth century, but there are some points of resem- 
 
4 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 hlance in the treatment of the two cases that are not 
 altogether unapt. 
 
 In August, 1831, a young lady, then eighteen years of age, 
 a daughter of one of our fellow-citizens residing in Charles- 
 town, became an inmate of the Community of Nuns esta- 
 blished at Mount Benedict in that town, and voluntarily 
 submitted for some time to a course of study aud disci- 
 pline designed to prepare her to become a teacher in the 
 Convent, and a religious recluse for life of the Ursuhne 
 order. After a residence of about six months, she be- 
 came dissatisfied with the religious profession she had em- 
 braced, and desired to return to her friends, against whose 
 wishes she had renounced the Protestant for the Catholic 
 faith. Having sufficient reason for believing that her re- 
 turn to the world would be opposed, and having no means 
 of communicating with her friends, she made her escape. 
 without the knowledge of the Superior of the Convent, and 
 was restored to her former friends and her former religion. 
 Soon after leaving the Convent, she became a member 
 of Christ Church in Boston, of the Episcopal order, of 
 which Rev. Mr. Croswell was rector. Her departure 
 from the Convent happened in February, 1832., and in Au- 
 gust, 1334, two years and five months having elapsed, the 
 Ursuline Convent was burnt to the ground by a lawless 
 mob. Since the commission of this outrage, a most cruel 
 attempt has been made by ihe friends of the Convent to 
 connect it with the young lady who escaped from the Nun- 
 nery in 1832, and who, from that period up to the time of 
 the riot in Charlestown, had been living in retirement, with 
 no wish, and with no possible means to produce an excite- 
 ment against that institution. In fact, it will be seen in 
 the course of these suggestions, that abundant causes to 
 account for the popular excitement against the Convent 
 bad occurred immediately preceding its destruction, with- 
 out any possible connection with the isolated fact that a 
 Joung girl had left the institution two years and a half be- 
 bre, and had given to her immediate "friends a narrative 
 of the events which she witnessed there. Nevertheless, 
 the fact that the young lady had committed such a narra- 
 tive to writing, soon after she left the Convent, (although 
 that fact was known to hut very few persons, including her 
 pastor and her immediate friends and advisers,) was mag- 
 nified into very great importance, after the Convent was 
 
INTRODUCTION. 5 
 
 burnt. For nearly a year before that event, the manuscript 
 of this Narrative (containing every fact precisely as it is now 
 published) had remained undisturbed in the hands of the re- 
 verend gentleman of whose church Miss R. had become a 
 member, after renouncing the Roman Catholic faith; and 
 whatever intention there might have originally been of 
 giving it publicity, all such intention had been abandoned. 
 It would seem, therefore, to have required the utmost inge- 
 nuity of motive hunters, to have traced the burning of the 
 Ursuline Convent in 1834 to a narrative of a six months' 
 residence there in 1831, which a young girl had written 
 two years before, and which had been seen in manuscript 
 only hy a very limited number of her friends. 
 
 But strange as it will be considered, on due reflection, 
 the " little treatise" published by Martin Luther, in 1520, 
 was not more terribly denounced by the Pope and his 
 spiritual subjects, than has been the simple manuscript 
 narrative of Miss R.,in 1832, by ihe Catholics and their 
 friends in this quarter. Even many of the apparent friends 
 of truth, and of the religion of the New Testament, will no 
 doubt be as much startled at the boldness of our presuming 
 to publish this little Narrative, and will consider it " the 
 signal for war," quite as seriously, and just as wisely, as 
 did some of the friends of Luther, when he gave his first 
 account of abuses and follies he had himself witnessed in. 
 the Monasteries and Convents of that day. And be it re- 
 membered too, that the statements of Luther for some time 
 rested on his individual assertions against the whole 
 hierarchy of Rome. Had Christians believed the Priests 
 and discredited Luther, where would have been the Re- 
 formation ? Shall then Christians of the present day, 
 Christian parents who have daughters to educate, disbe- 
 lieve the narrative of a residence in a modern Convent, 
 made by a convert from that order, merely because in mat- 
 ters of fact which only she and the Catholic community at 
 the institution could have witnessed, the latter attempt to 
 discredit her testimony ? Would they not do so of course, 
 if the disclosure of the truth must open the eyes of Protes- 
 tants, so as to convince them of the impropriety of intrust- 
 ing the education of their daughters to a secret and super- 
 stitious community of Catholic Priests and Nuns? 
 
 It is in the hope that the truth will prevail, that we have 
 advised the publication of thie Narrative, which, just like 
 
6 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 the little treatise of Luther, has been denounced and con- 
 demned by those who know nothing of its real contents, 
 as " heretical, scandalous, and offensive to pious ears." 
 We doubt not that when it is published, that portion of the 
 community and the press who have made up their minds 
 to listen to nothing against the infallibility ofUrsuline 
 Convents to educate Protestant daughters, will not, in their 
 denunciations, be a whit behind the damnatory bull of 
 Pope Leo X. against Luther, for publishing his " little 
 treatise." All persons will be forbidden to read and be- 
 lieve the " little" Narrative about the Convent, under pain 
 of being held up to public odium as among the rioters, or 
 at least abettors of the riot, which led to the destruction 
 of the Nunnery at Mount Benedict. Even pious men and 
 women will be so eager to show their religious tolerance 
 and Christian chanty for Catholic Nunneries, that they 
 will labor with all thei^ might to destroy the character of 
 an American Protestant girl, who has escaped from Catho- 
 lic superstition ; in order to maintain the infallible purity 
 of a secret community of foreign females, who have intro- 
 duced among us for the imitation of the daughters of re- 
 publicans, the ascetic austerities of a religious discipline 
 destructive of all domestic and social relations. 
 
 As to those who have advised this publication, and who 
 venture to doubt the infallibility of Convents in 1S.J5, as 
 Luther did the infallibility of the Pope in 1520, we antici- 
 pate, as a matter of course, from a portion of the commu- 
 nity, all manner of denunciations and excommunications, 
 as " obstinate heretics, fit only to be delivered unto Satan 
 for the destruction of the flesh." Nevertheless, we veiy 
 conscientiously believe that it is as much our duty to give 
 this " little" Narrative of Convent discipline to the Chris- 
 tian public, as it was the duty of Luther to publish his 
 "little treatise" three hundred years ago. We earnestly 
 desire that the public may discriminate between the Ro- 
 man Catholic religion and a Roman Catholic school to 
 educate daughters of Protestants, and that they will not 
 longer confound religious toleration with the encourage- 
 ment of monastic seminaries of learning. We regard 
 this matter as more immediately connected with the great 
 interests of education among us, than it is with the ad- 
 vancement of pure and undefiled religion. It is not a 
 question of creeds and sects, hut it is a grave question how 
 
INTRODUCTION. 7 
 
 the future ornaments to our most refined society, the future 
 accomplished mothers of American citizens, shall be edu- 
 cated. We ask, in this view, is it not a startling fact, that 
 here in the town of Charle?town,in the immediate vicinity 
 of Boston, celebrated above all other communities for its 
 means of giving a Christian and a republican education to 
 its children, the aid of a foreign, ascetic, superstitious, anti- 
 republican institution should have been Galled in, esta- 
 blished solely by Roman Catholics, who have taken reli- 
 vious vows of" poverty," and yet hold out public induce- 
 ments and charge the highest prices for educating the 
 daughters of wealthy parents of that class of Christians 
 whom " all good Catholics" regard as heretics, who must 
 inevitably be damned unless they are converted to the only 
 true faith ! 
 
 It is high time that a little common sense was applied to 
 the estimate of the motives and objects of Roman Catho- 
 lic monastic institutions for educating Protestant chil- 
 dren ! Many of our most influential citizens seem to be 
 preparing the public to abandon all Protestant schools, and 
 send their daughters to be educated in Roman Catholic 
 Cloisters. The next step may be, that whenever a young 
 girl, thus educated, is crossed in love, or disappointed in 
 securing a fashionable establishment in marriage, she will 
 turn Nun, and take the vows of the Ursuline order ; and 
 wealthy parents, who have more daughters than they ca:i 
 portion in the style they have been brought up, may find it 
 convenient to persuade the least beautiful to take the veil. 
 Such things are common among the aristocracies of Europe. 
 Why may they not be introduced here, if public opinion is 
 found to favor the establishment of Convents? 
 
 The highly respectable Committee appointed by the citi- 
 zens of Boston, not to eulogize the Convent, but solely " to 
 investiga^ the p"oceedings of the night of the riot, and to 
 adopt every suitable mode of bringing the authors and 
 abettors of the outrage to justice," say in their elaborate 
 vindication of that institution, that " the number of pupils 
 has varied from forty to sixty, during each of the past five 
 years, being for the most part daughters of those among 
 the most respectable families in the country, of various re- 
 ligious denominations, the number of Catholics never ex- 
 ceeding ten at any one time. No means were taken (say 
 the Committee) to influence or affect their religious opt- 
 
8 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 nions, nor can it be ascertained that any pupil placed under 
 their charge for the purposes of education has been con- 
 verted from any other to the Catholie faith, or induced to 
 become a member of the Community." 
 
 The Superior of the Convent, in her testimony on the 
 trial *f the rioters, declared that the vows of her religious 
 order are " poverty, chastity, and obedience ; to separate 
 themselves from the world, and to follow the instructions 
 of the Superior." She also testified that the institution at 
 Mount Benedict was supported by the profits of the school ; 
 that it was out of debt, and all the property paid for, be- 
 sides more than a thousand dollars in cash in her private 
 drawer, which she had not counted for a year! (an evi- 
 dence of " poverty," by the way, which most people who 
 take no vows to become paupers would rejoice to have in 
 their possession.) She further testified that there were no 
 funds but those arising from the pupils, and that she and 
 her sisters in the Ursuline Community were supported out 
 of that fund ; this whole " Community," so supported, con- 
 sisting of" eight Nuns and two Novices at the Convent." 
 
 Both the Superior and the Bishop testified that the pro- 
 perty of the Nunnery which was destroyed amountea to 
 fifty thousand dollars, exclusive of the real estate and ap- 
 purtenances. 
 
 Now put these facts together, and what are we called on to 
 believe .' Why, that a capital of at least sixty thousand 
 dollars (which invested in stocks would have yielded a 
 revenue of three thousand six hundred dollars annually) 
 was set apart and put into the splendid and sumptuous esta- 
 blishment at Mount Benedict, for the purpose of supporting 
 ten females who had taken on themselves vows of poverty, 
 and also for the purpose of educating ten Roman Catholic 
 children! Was there ever greater disparity between means 
 employed and the professed ends lor which those means 
 are said to be employed ? 
 
 The Nunnery, therefore, could not have been designed 
 merely as a family residence, or as a place of worship for 
 ten females under" vows of " poverty," nor could so exten- 
 sive an institution have been erected to educate ten Catho- 
 lic children. Neither could the Nuns themselves be am- 
 bitious of public distinction as eminent teachers, for they 
 had vowea " to separate themselves from the world!" 
 
 The primary object, then, must have been, not to provide 
 
INTRODUCTION. 9 
 
 a place for the religious devotion of Roman Catholics, but 
 to establish a seminary for the education of the daughters 
 of Protestants. This is proved by the public advertise- 
 ments of the Superior, and the agencies established in New- 
 Orleans and other cities, to procure Protesta.it pupils for 
 the Charlestown Nunnery. If then it was a mere school, 
 it has no claim to sanctity, and should be open to examina- 
 tion, like the schools of Protestants. We protest against 
 claiming religious sanctity for a school for girls. If the 
 Nunnery was a place for disseminating the Roman Catho- 
 lic religion, then the children of Protestants should not be 
 sent there to learn that religion. But if it was a school to 
 educate Protestant girls, then the whole interior discipline 
 of both pupils and teachers ought to be known. 
 
 But why should Roman Catholics establish so costly a 
 seminary in the vicinity of Boston, to educate the daughters 
 of Protestants ? Could it have originated in the disinte- 
 rested benevolence of a foreign lady, brought up in the se- 
 clusion of a Convent in Canada, who, with her five sisters 
 similarly educated, should have taken such a deep interest 
 in the young ladies of Boston and the United States, as to 
 form so extensive an establishment to enable them to obtain 
 an accomplished education ? 
 
 Or could the intelligent Catholic Bishop of Boston have 
 been so deeply impressed with the total neglect of female 
 education in Boston and its vicinity, as to be at all this 
 trouble and expense for the sole benefit of the daughters 
 of heretics, without the least design, as the Boston Com- 
 mittee affirm, to use the slightest means to influence or 
 affect their religious opinions ? Neither the Bishop nor the 
 Superior could have looked to this establishment as a 
 source of pecuniary profit, because that would be to compel 
 the Nuns to become teachers for filthy lucre, and thus vio- 
 late their vow of" poverty !" 
 
 If, then, no mercenary views were connected with the 
 establishment of the Nunnery, and there was no lack of 
 good Protestant schools for Protestant females, (certainly 
 much better than the Nunnery proved to be,) where was 
 the motive? "It was disinterested benevolence!" say 
 the friends of the Convent. Perhaps we could have be- 
 lieved it was, if the avowed object of the institution had 
 been to convert the children of heretics to the true faith, in 
 order to save them from eternal destruction. Look at it in 
 
10 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 this view a moment. Here were eight females having 1 the 
 charge of fifty amiable and interesting girls, and believing 
 on their souls that every one of these cnildren were misera- 
 ble heretics, who must be damned to all eternity, unless 
 they embraced the Roman Catholic faith ! If the Superior 
 and her Nuns did not honestly believe this, then their reli- 
 gion is a cheat or they were hypocrites. We draw no such 
 conclusion, but doubt not they sincerely believed the infal- 
 lible creed of" mother church," that these children, with 
 all their winning attractions, must inevitably be shut out 
 of all hopes of heaven, unless they were converted to Ro- 
 manism. Could pious and benevolent ladies, day after 
 day, and year after year, see their own children, as it were, 
 placed in this awful peril, and not make an effort to save 
 them from eternal destruction? What should we say of a 
 
 Eious clergyman, at the head of a seminary, who should 
 ave fifty boys in his school, whose parents had brought 
 them up to deny God and ridicule the Scriptures, and yet 
 he should boast publicly that he had " taken no means to 
 influence or q^ecMheir religious opinions," and had " never 
 exacted their attendance upon religious services ?" Is not 
 this the Tight in which the Boston Committee represent the 
 Superior of the Convent and the Bishop, if they really have 
 made no effort, for five years, to save the precious souls of 
 fifty interesting female children, intrusted by heretics to 
 their paternal care ? 
 
 Most assuredly it is; and if what they say of the Con- 
 vent in this particular he true, it takes away the last pos- 
 sible pretence for getting up that institution — benevolence. 
 Had the Superior or the Bishop suffered one of the Protes- 
 tant pupils to have walked in her sleep out of the window, 
 and lost b^r life, when timely caution might have prevented 
 it, wifh what horror the community would have heard of 
 such an outrage. And yet the Boston Committee ask us 
 to believe that all the Priests and Nuns at the Convent 
 religiously believed that the fifty children they had under 
 their daily care were walking "in the sleep of spiritual 
 death, liable every moment to fall into eternal perdition, 
 but they would not reach forth a hand to save them ! " No 
 means were taken to influence or affect their religious opi- 
 nions!" It seems to us that it would be more honorable 
 to the establishment at Mount Benedict, to prove that it 
 was designed to save the daughters of heretics from perdi- 
 
INTRODUCT ION. 11 
 
 tion, by making them good Catholics ; and in point ot fact 
 we believe the Committee were mistaken. There are pu- 
 pils from the Nunnery who declare that serious attempts 
 were made to affect their religious opinions ; and in truth 
 could it possibly be otherwise, with ingenuous girls, living 
 in the romantic atmosphere of a Roman Catholic Nunne- 
 ry, with all the mvsterious and externally imposing cere- 
 monies of that religion constantly passing before their 
 eyes and ears, in a portion of which they daily partici- 
 pated ? If any one desired to possess the power of giving 
 a color to the impressions of after life, would he ask for 
 better means than these ? 
 
 If then the object of establishing Catholic Nunneries to 
 educate Protestant girls is neither pecuniary profit, world- 
 ly honor, or disinterested benevolence, is it uncharitable to 
 conjecture that the real design must he to give to Catholics 
 a controlling influence over the minds of our youth, and 
 disseminate their tenets, by an imperceptible, winning way 
 of not seeming to disseminate them at all ? At any rale, 
 as the education of our daughters is a matter of such vital 
 importance to the purity of society, can we know too much 
 of the interior discipline of an institution in which they 
 have been placed without their parents ever being permit- 
 ted to enter any part of the school or the Nunnery, except 
 a common visiting parlor to which the pupils and their 
 instructers are called, whenever they are seen by the pub- 
 lic eye ? 
 
 These are some of the considerations which have led to 
 the publication of the unpretending narrative that will be 
 found in this little book. It has been committed to the 
 press after a long, deliberate, and, we may add, prayerful 
 consideration of the dictates of justice, truth, and religion. 
 The existence of such a narrative in manuscript, and vari- 
 ous and unfounded speculations as to the nature of its 
 contents, have been connected with the destruction of the 
 Convent, and have given rise to many injurious and un- 
 kind misrepresentations of the motives of its author, ever 
 since that outrage was committed. Individuals in private, 
 and committees in public reports, have made the sup- 
 posed contents of this narrative the basis of a formidable 
 "conspiracy, extending into many of the neighboring 
 towns," resulting in the final burning of the Convent, on 
 the 11th of August, 1S34. Others have supposed that it 
 
12 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 would disclose terrible scenes of personal profligacy and 
 inquisitorial tortures : but both classes who have so 
 judged have entirely misapprehended the character of the 
 narrative, and of its author. Under these contradictory 
 impressions, one portion of the community have been 
 urging the immediate publication of the Narrative, while 
 others have threatened its author, and those who should 
 undertake its publication, with a worse excommunication 
 and denunciation than was inflicted upon Luther for his 
 temerity. Nevertheless, " the more thinking and judicious 
 part of mankind," who have had an opportunity of learn- 
 ing the facts, have " looked upon the publication" of the 
 whole matter " as the wisest step, even in a worldly and 
 prudential light, which could possibly be taken to render 
 contemptible and abortive" the attempts that have been 
 made and are still making to silence the press, to condemn 
 all who condemn Convents, and to injure the peace of 
 mind and destroy the delicate reputation of the daughter 
 of one of our native citizens, in order to justify a foreign 
 institution established among us under the control of a 
 hierarchy adverse to a republican form of government. 
 
 We have not believed that it became American Chris- 
 tians or American citizens to offer up, on the altar of a 
 Roman Catholic Convent, the character of one of our own 
 unoffending daughters, who, after having been drawn into 
 the Romish Church, by the exterior romautic attractions 
 of a Nunnery patronized by Protestants, has had the 
 Christian fortitude to escape from the dark meshes in 
 which her mind had been entangled, and to disclose, in 
 the simple language of truth, all that she saw, heard, and 
 felt, while under this delusion. From a careful examina- 
 tion of this subject, we are led to view it as a remarkable 
 evidence of conscious innocence and integrity, as well as 
 piety and firmness, that a young and delicate female, 
 of timid and retiring habits, of extreme sensibility, and 
 with her health seriously impaired by religious auste- 
 rities and seclusion, should have been enabled to main- 
 tain so much consistency, mildness, and propriety in 
 all she has said, written, or done in relation to her con- 
 nection with the Ursuline Convent : and that too when 
 much of the weahh and talent of this great city has been 
 enlisted in defending and eulogizing that establishment, 
 and in denouncing as participators in or approvers of the 
 
INTRODUCTION. 13 
 
 riot, all who called in question the sanctity of its inmates, 
 and the propriety of Protestants sending their daughters 
 there. We have never discovered in the feelings or lan- 
 guage of Miss R. the slightest indication of resentment 
 toward that Community or its Superior, nor will it be de- 
 tected in any portion of her Narrative, which it seems to 
 us no person of an unbiased mind can peruse without feel- 
 ing a conviction not to be resisted, that it is the unaffected 
 language of truth and innocence. 
 
 The circumstances under which this relation of a six 
 months' residence in the Ursuline Convent at Charlestown, 
 was originally prepared, and which have led to its present 
 publication, are material in forming an estimate of the 
 degree of credit that may confidently be attached to it. 
 We wish it to be distinctly understood that the publication 
 is not made at the instigation, or on the responsibility of 
 the author. On the contrary, she has very reluctantly 
 yielded to the force of circumstances and the dictates of 
 duty, which, in the opinion of her friends and the friends 
 of truth, have left no other course proper to be pursued : 
 and has placed her manuscript at their disposal. If then 
 there is an error of judgment in giving this work publicity, 
 it belongs to the friends of Miss R., and to many of our 
 most sedate and respectable citizens who have advised 
 with them, and not to herself. The design of the publica- 
 tion on our part, is to vindicate her from unjust and un- 
 manly aspersions which some friends of the Convent have 
 indulged in toward her, and especially to advance the 
 cause of truth. We earnestly hope anil believe that this 
 little work, if universally diffused, will do more, by its 
 unaffected simplicity, in deterring Protestant parents from 
 educating their daughters at Catholic Nu.ineries, than 
 could the most labored and learned discourses on the dan- 
 gers of Popery. And if it has this blessed effect in guard- 
 ing the young women of our land against the danger of 
 early impressions imbibed- at Convents in favor of a form 
 of religion which is to be tolerated but nsver to be encou- 
 raged in a free country, it will do more even than the 
 laws can do in suppressing such outrages as the riot ai 
 Charlestown; for if Protestant parents will resolve to 
 educate their daughters at Protestant schools, and patro- 
 nize no more Nunneries, then no more Nunneries will be 
 established in this country, and there will be none for 
 reckless mohs to destroy. 
 
14 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 We do not desire to interfere in any manner with the 
 religious privileges of Roman Catholics, or with their 
 education of their own daughters in any form they may 
 think proper, if not inconsistent with the Jaws ; but we 
 earnestly nope, that Protestant parents, before they place 
 their children under the tuition of either a College of Je- 
 suits or a Community of Nuns and Catholic Priests, will 
 first inquire how the proposed educators of their daughters 
 ha%-e themselves been educated: and what the nature and 
 effect of the absurd superstitions, the ascetic austerities, 
 the ridiculous penances, the secret confessionals, the un- 
 checked facilities for intrigue, which constitute the disci- 
 pline of a Convent, are and must be upon instructers and 
 pupils, abiding under such influences. 
 
 This little Narrative is an unaffected and plain relation 
 of facts, upon which a correct opinion can be formed of the 
 probable tendencies of such a system. It was commenced 
 in 1632, and completed in the winter of 1833. Not one of 
 t*use at whose suggestion it is now published had ever 
 heard of it until after the destruction of the Convent, and 
 we are well assured that very few persons indeed knew 
 that it had ever been written, until after the outrage at 
 Charlestown had been committed. It was placed in our 
 hands, as the friends of truth, after the publicity of the 
 personal attacks which had been made upon Miss R. with 
 singular unkindness and injustice, through a portion of 
 the public press, by the constant and relentless calumnies 
 of the female superintendent of the Convent, and finally 
 by the illiberal, and, we are compelled to add, ungenerous, 
 Report of the Boston Investigating Committee, in which 
 thirty-eight gentlemen of high character (every one of 
 whom would spurn the thought of deliberately injuring an 
 mi protected female) have been induced to give their 
 sanction to aspersions and insinuations against a daughter 
 of one of their own fellow-citizens, upon no evidence 
 whatever, except that derived from ancf through the of- 
 fended Superior of the Convent and her Community, from 
 whom that daughter had escaped, under circumstances 
 which, if true, render the testimony of her accusers wholly 
 unsafe as a guide to the real character of the interior of 
 the Nunnery. 
 
 It has been represented that the contents of Miss R.'s 
 narrative were very monstrous, shocking, and incredible, 
 
INTRODUCTION. 15 
 
 and even the charge of aberration of mind has been re- 
 sorted to, by those who would have great cause of thank- 
 fulness if they were 'blessed with the singleness of heart 
 and the unaffected piety which mark the character of that 
 young lady. Threats have even been thrown out that her 
 character should be made to suffer if she dared to publish 
 any thing against the Convent, and it is understood that 
 the Boston Investigating Committee upon the destruction 
 of the Convent were urged to retain in their Report the 
 harsh language toward Miss R. which had been prepared 
 by a sub-committee, in order to discredit by anticipation 
 any statements which might thereafter be made on her au- 
 thority, relative to the internal discipline of that establish- 
 ment. We fully acquit the majority of that very respecta- 
 ble committee of any deliberate design to wound the 
 feelings and injure the reputation of a lady. They acted 
 under the sudden and laudable impulse of manly resent- 
 ment toward the authors of a shameless outrage committed 
 upon the residence of defenceless females ; and as the 
 ladies of the Convent were then the most prominent suf- 
 ferers, and the objects of universal public sympathy, it was 
 natural, if not excusable, that high-minded men, in their 
 eagerness to redress their wrongs, should have become 
 unmindful of the rights of a single individual, who was 
 represented by the Catholics and some of their friends as 
 the prime mover of the excitement against the Convent, 
 by reason of the calumnies she was represented as having 
 circulated against it. 
 
 As one of the material considerations which in our opi- 
 nion has rendered the publication of this Narrative indis- 
 pensable, we subjoin several extracts from the Report of 
 the Boston Committee, which, it will be seen, directly 
 attributes to Miss R. the principal origin of the popular 
 excitement that led to the disgraceful catastrophe of the 
 11th of August. 
 
 "It appeared immediately upon commencing the investi- 
 gation, that the destruction of the Convent might be attri- 
 buted primarily to a widely-extended popular aversion, 
 founded in the belief that the establishment was obnoxious 
 to those imputations of cruelty, vice, and corruption, sc ge- 
 nerally credited of similar establishments in other coun- 
 tries, and was inconsistent with the principles of our 
 national institutions, and in violation of the laws of the 
 
16 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 commonwealth ; and which aversion, in the minds of 
 many, had been fomented to hatred, hy representations in* 
 jnrious to the moral reputation of the members of that 
 Community attributing to thein impurity of conduct, and 
 excessive cruelties in their treatment of each other and of 
 the pupils ; and denunciatory of the institution as hostile 
 in its character and influence alike to the laws of God and 
 man: and also by reports that one of the sisterhood, Mrs. 
 Mary John, formerly Miss Elizabeth Harrison, after hav- 
 ing fled from the Convent to escape its persecutions, and 
 then been induced by the influence or threats of Bishop 
 Fenwick to return, had been put to death, or secretly im- 
 prisoned or removed." 
 
 " The Committee have been unable to find any report 
 in circulation injurious to the reputation of the members of 
 the Community, which may not be traced to one of the 
 above sources, or which has any other apparent foundation/' 
 
 In another part of their Report the Committee say : — 
 " In pursuing their inquiries into the truth of the injurious 
 representations and reports above referred to, members of 
 the Committee have had an interview with the young lady 
 upon whose authority they were supposed to rest.'' And 
 they then proceed to give the result of that interview as if 
 derived from the young lady herself. 
 
 Again they say : — " It was doubtless under the influence 
 of these feelings and impressions, that some of the conspi- 
 rators were led to design the destruction of the Convent." 
 
 It will be seen therefore that this Report directly 
 ascribes the origin of the outrage on the Nunnery to the 
 aversion and hatred fomented by injurious representations 
 and reports, founded upon the authority of Mi*s R., who 
 had left the Convent more than two years before it was 
 destroyed by a mob. The sub-committee who drew up the 
 Report, in fact, attach but very little importance to the 
 escape of Miss Harrison, (who was one of the ti-uslees of 
 the establishment,) and the exciting circumstances attend- 
 ing her leaving the Convent and her sudden return to it. 
 They cast no censure on her, and impute no indiscretion 
 to her, or to those who required her to labor so hard as a 
 teacher as to derange her faculties. They do not inquire 
 whither she was really deranged or not, (of which there is 
 no direct proof, and very much against it.) and they are 
 entirely willing to exempt her, and those who refused to 
 
INTRODUCTION. 17 
 
 explain promptly the cause of her escape, from all possible 
 blame as the real or innocent authors of the mob ; while they 
 seriously set about affixing upon a humble Protestant girl, 
 who had been deluded into the Catholic Church and 
 escaped from her spiritual thraldom, all the " injurious 
 reports" that led to the riot. Neither did the Committee 
 inquire whether the threats of the Superior to the select- 
 men of Charlestown, that the Bishop could order out 
 twenty thousand Irishmen to destroy their property ; and 
 the insults which I he pupils cast upon the public authori- 
 ties of the town when they visited that establishment, 
 were not sufficient causes to account for the public excite- 
 ment, without going back nearly three years, to trace the 
 origin of a formidable conspiracy to a mere girl ! 
 
 Alter thus preparing the public to regard with aversion 
 a " young woman" who could have spent nearly three years 
 in fomenting hatred against the Convent, by means of in- 
 jurious reports, until sne had produced an excitement that 
 led to the commission of burglary and arson by a mob, the 
 Report of the Committee proceeds to give a summary of 
 the whole of her testimony as they profess to have re- 
 ceived it irom her own mouth. 
 
 And how did they arrive at their version of all that Miss 
 P authorized or did not authorize, relative to reports af- 
 fecting the character of the Nunnery 1 Two members of 
 the Committee, it seems, had one interview with the 
 young lady, to whom they were entire strangers, and out 
 of that interview they derive materials for disposing of the 
 whole matter, in a very summary manner. It should be 
 borne in mind that just before the Report comes to this 
 conclusion, it deliberately asserts that the Committee 
 were " unable to lind any report in circulation, injurious to 
 the members of the Convent," which was not traced either 
 to Miss R. or to the reports which grew out of the elope- 
 ment of Miss Harrison. There is then introduced a lor- 
 mal disclaimer ibr Miss R., followed by a classification of 
 her supposed testimony, from which the Report arrives at 
 the happy conclusion that Miss R. had in fact said nothing 
 against the Convent amounting to any thing, and that 
 all she did say was entirely discredited : and yet she is 
 indirectly held up to the public odium in that Report as the 
 author of the mob, and her testimony discredited by con- 
 trast with that of the ladies of the Convent, when by the 
 
18 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 showing of the Report itself she had said nothing really 
 injurious to the Convent ! Why then was she injured in 
 this public manner, on the pretence that other people had 
 circulated false reports in her name, which reports she 
 never heard of and the Committee do not specify? 
 
 The two gentlemen of the Committee who had the inter- 
 view with Miss R. say for her, that " she entirely dis- 
 claimed most of the reports passing under the sanction of 
 her name, and particularly all affecting the moral purity 
 of the members of the institution, or the ill treatment of 
 the pupils under their care:" and this disclaimer is pub- 
 lished in Italics, as if it were the precise language of Miss 
 R. But it is not her language, nor did she ever authorize 
 any such public disclaimer to be made for her. " Dis- 
 claimed most of the reports passing under the sanction of 
 her name," say the Committee ! If the reports had the 
 sanction of her name, then she must have authorized 
 them. But what were the reports passing under her 
 name ? Miss R. never heard of any reports passing under 
 her name, except those found in her INarrative. Did the 
 two gentlemen whom Miss R. (mistaking for friends, and 
 not suspecting they came to get materials to injure het 
 veracity) consented to see, though reluctantly, the third 
 time they called for that purpose — did these gentlemen in- 
 scribe to her a single specific report as passing under het 
 name, and ask her if it was true '. If she disclaimed most 
 of the reports passing under her name, what were those 
 " most," and what were the remainder of the reports she 
 did not disclaim ? Could specific reports be disclaimed 
 by her, when Miss R. was not apprized what the reports 
 were that the Committee say were passing under the 
 sanction of her name ? 
 
 Then as to the formal disclaimer of all reports affecting 
 the moral purity of the members, &c. Miss R., as the gen- 
 tlemen subsequently admitted, used no such language as 
 this. " Moral purity" is a wide phrase, and as here used 
 it implies that Miss R. had never witnessed any thing at 
 the Convent which was morally wrong. Had the Com- 
 mittee confined this disclaimer to any imputations on fe- 
 male virtue, they would have been correct, and would not 
 have fallen into the error of doing great injustice to one 
 lady, in their zeal to vindicate others. The gentlemen 
 who called on Miss R. cannot have forgotten that she 
 
INTRODUCTION. 19 
 
 declined saying any thing on this subject, and that the 
 language introduced into the Report is their own inference. 
 In relation to the ill treatment of the papils, there was no 
 disclaimer at all. One of the gentlemen who called on 
 Miss R. has frankly admitted this, and he would have 
 corrected that portion of the Repo % had it not been be- 
 yond his control when the error was pointed out to him. 
 On his part a highly honorable disposition was evinced to 
 correct the unjust advantage which had been taken of a 
 private conversation with a lady, who had no suspicion 
 she was undergoing a public examination, in an inter- 
 view which she understood was iriendly and confiden- 
 tial. 
 
 After these disclaimers, the Report classifies what it 
 terms Miss R. ? s " accusations" under the heads of" severe 
 penance," "restraints upon members of the Community," 
 and penances inflicted upon a Nun in her last illness, 
 by which her life was shortened. And in order to leave 
 no mistake in the inference that all these disclaimers and 
 assertions are derived from Miss R. herself, as the whole 
 sum and substance of her experience at the Convent, the 
 Report sums up with this conclusion : — 
 
 " From her statement, therefore, it is evident that there 
 could be, except in the subject of the last accusation, no 
 cause of public complaint, inasmuch as the other evils 
 alleged, if existing, were confined to those who were 
 voluntarily members of the institution, affecting neither 
 the property nor the happiness of other individuals, nor 
 tending in any wise to the injury of the public morals, or a 
 violation of law." 
 
 In other words, shortening the life of a Nun by severe 
 penances, inflicted in her " last illness," would be a cause 
 of public complaint against a Convent ; but severe pena-nces 
 and restraints, however destructive of health, which Nuns 
 and Novitiates might be compelled to suffer, before their 
 "last illness," would furnish no ground for any complaint 
 at all, provided they survived the cruelty inflicted by su- 
 perstition ! Upon the same reasoning, the slow tortures 
 of the Inquisition might have been introduced into the 
 Monastery at Mount Benedict, and so long as they ware 
 confined to the " voluntary members," and did not result 
 in the actual death of their victims, there would be " no 
 cause of public complaint," because while the infernal pro- 
 
20 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 cess of cruelty was kept secret within the walls of a dun- 
 geon, it could not in any wise injure the public morals ! 
 The Bramins of the East argued in the same way against 
 ihe interference of the British with the privilege of widows 
 being voluntarily burned on the funeral pile of their hus- 
 bands. They insisted that it " affected neither the pro- 
 perty nor the happiness of other individuals," that it was 
 an ancient custom, and. in fact promoted the "public 
 morals," by insuring the wife's solicitude for her husband 
 while living, and her fidelity after his death. 
 
 Is it not also remarkable, that the Report of the Boston 
 Committee could have come to the conclusion, that although 
 fifty Protestant girls were placed under the entire control 
 and instruction of a community of eight Nuns, one of whom 
 had been obliged to labor so hard as a teacher as to driv6 
 her to madness, yet it was " no cause of public complaint," 
 even admitting that the persons thus intrusted with giving 
 the first impressions to young ladies were in the daily 
 practice of superstitiously inflicting upon each other, and 
 upon themselves, severe penances, rigorous restraints, and 
 all the absurd cruelties imposed by monastic religious dis- 
 cipline ? 
 
 We have no wish to say one word disrespectful to the 
 gentlemen who signed the Report of the Boston Investigat- 
 ing Committee. Their motives were highly honorable. 
 But there were some few acting in the Committee without 
 any legitimate authority, (for the original committee had no 
 power to increase their number,) whose zeal to vindicate 
 the Convent and its Protestant patrons made them forget 
 what was due to the daughter of an American citizen. 
 Tins is painfully obvious in the manner in which Miss R. 
 has been introduced into that Report, without her know- 
 ledge or consent. She was not calied as a witness before 
 the Committee, so that each might have judged of her in- 
 telligence for himself. They did not see her narrative of 
 her residence at the Nunnery, nor did she make a single 
 " accusation" to them against the Convent. Neither had 
 she or her friends any notice of the written and spoken 
 " accusations" which were made to the Committee by 
 Mrs. Moffatt, Superior of the Convent, against Miss R. ; 
 and no opportunity was given, though it was asked for, to 
 enable the friends of Miss R. to protect her against that 
 portion of the Report designed to affect her character inju- 
 
INTRODUCTION. 21 
 
 riously. The whole process was sending two gentlemen 
 to converse an hour with her alone, under an assurance of 
 friendly confidence, without apprizing her that any public 
 use whatever was to be made of the conversation, or inti- 
 mating to her that the entire truth of her relations had 
 been or would he called in question. Though disposed to 
 respect the motives of the gentlemen who called on Miss 
 R., and obtained a portion of her confidence for a purpose 
 which was certainly concealed from her at the time ; they 
 must permit us to say that they did their own high sense 
 of honor, as well as Miss R., great injustice, when they 
 allowed a public use to be made of a private conversa- 
 tion with a lady, wiio did not consent to see them until they 
 called the third time, who then referred them to another 
 person for information, and who would not have seen them 
 at all, could she have conjectured that the object was to 
 obtain the means of discrediting her veracitv, and introduc- 
 ing her before the public in the unjust and unkind man- 
 ner she is treated in that Report. 
 
 But the gentlemen who nave mistaken the point of 
 honor as well as justice in this transaction, have the 
 
 f)ower in their own nands, to use it as they think proper; 
 or, unfortunately, their interview with Miss R. took 
 filace without any friend on her part being present. In 
 act, the strong bias of that Report to justify the Convent 
 at the expense of all whose statements had affected it in- 
 juriously, must be apparent, when we find gentlemen of 
 the highest character and integrity, sitting as an impartial 
 tribunal, proceeding first to collect the asseverations of the 
 Superior, her Nuns, and the Catholic Priests, as to the 
 purity of their own conduct, and their version of the con- 
 duct of Miss R., who had escaped from them ; then sending 
 a committee, as private gentlemen, to call on that lady with 
 assurances of friendly confidence and religious fellowship, 
 and introducing into a public report the alleged results of 
 that interview, as " her statement," which is used in order 
 to show that " her statement" is not to be believed I 
 
 The only grounds on which the Committee in that Re- 
 port justify their unkind treatment of Miss R., is, that 
 " it is stated (so and so) by the ladies of the institution." 
 This statement, which comes solely from the party accused, 
 an impartial committee receive as conclusive evidence of 
 the purity and propriety of all the proceedings at the Con- 
 Tent, ana upon this evidence they discredit Miss R. 
 
22 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 Is it not, indeed, very remarkable, that that young lady 
 should have been the only individual singled out in the Re- 
 port of the Committee, the only person whose testimony is 
 formally stated in order to be discredited, especially when 
 it is recollected that she was the only person who was 
 acquainted with the interior discipline of the Convent, and 
 whose evidence could be used to disclose any thing wrong, 
 if any thing wrong existed there ? The Committee had no 
 such design, but how natural was it for the friends of the 
 Superior, imbibing her strong dislike to a seceder from the 
 Convent, to infuse into the Report an ingredient of malice 
 which to the whole Committee nore the semblance of truth. 
 The Attorney-General, in his eloquent denunciation of the 
 rioters, said that the age of chivalry was gone here, for no 
 one stepped forward to rescue the property of the Convent 
 from a mob. Was there any less want of chivalry when 
 thirty-eight gentlemen brought all their influence to bear 
 against a young lady, and condemned her unheard ? 
 
 It was on the appearance of this Report, reflecting upon 
 the character of a young lady, (who had apparentlv com- 
 mitted no error, except suffering her romantic credulity to 
 lead her to renounce the religion in which she had been 
 brought up, for the supposed sanctity and seclusion of a 
 Nunnery,) that a number of her friends and the friends 
 of truth felt that something was due to a defenceless 
 daughter of one of our own citizens, and that she ought 
 not to be exposed to censure for disclosing any facts con- 
 nected with the Convent, if they were such as ought to 
 put Protestant parents on their guard against educating 
 their daughters at Catholic Cloisters. 
 
 They began to doubt whether something was not wrong, 
 when they found it a part of the plan of those most zeal- 
 ous in eulogizing the Convent, to destroy the reputation 
 of a female who had returned to the Protestant faith, and 
 whose only faults were that her religion had been affected 
 by Catnolic influence, that it led her to become a novitiate 
 in the Convent, that she had left it as soon as she be- 
 came sensible of the tendency of such a system of religious 
 discipline as was practised there, and had not shrunk 
 from telling the plain truth to her friends and her religious 
 teacher in explanation of her own conduct during her con- 
 nection with the Nunnery. It was understood that great 
 efforts had been made by a portion of the Investigating 
 
INTRODUCTION. 23 
 
 Committee, aided by the amiable and pious clergyman 
 before alluded to, to exclude from the Report all direct al- 
 lusion to Miss R. ; and but for the earnestness with which 
 the sacrifice of that young lady was urged by a few, this 
 desirable object would have been accomplished, and the 
 publication of Miss R.'s narrative been rendered unnecessa- 
 ry for her vindication. The same facts and arguments to 
 rebut the supposed allegations against, the Convent might 
 have been introduced into the Report, without any personal 
 reference to Miss R. But it seems to have been the design 
 of a portion of that Report, (in which, however, we are satis- 
 fied but a small number of the Committee participated,) to 
 attribute all the stories injurious to the Convent to Miss R., 
 to represent her as the author of monstrous, undefined 
 calumnies, and then make use of a conversation held with 
 her, in the absence of all her friends, to discredit her tes- 
 timony generally, and in all matters resting upon her 
 statement on one side, and the contradiction of the female 
 superintendent of the Convent on the other, to give a de- 
 cided preponderance in public opinion to the latter. 
 
 Nevertheless, though the injustice of this proceeding 
 was apparent to those best acquainted with the real facts 
 in the case, it was equally apparent that while the excite- 
 ment consequent on the infamous outrage upon the proper- 
 ty of the owners and occupants of the Convent was at its 
 height, it would be in vain to appeal to the public for a 
 candid estimate of the real merits of the case at issue. It 
 was also considered, that it might be regarded as an at- 
 tempt to influence the public in relation to the important 
 trials then pending, should such an appeal be made through 
 the public press. The injustice, therefore, was submitted 
 to in silence, until the public mind should be quieted, and 
 a legal examination, under oath, take place of the ex parte 
 and exaggerated investigation which had been held be- 
 fore the Boston Committee, who had embodied the vague 
 stories of voluntary witnesses, related not under oath, but 
 in secret, under an assurance that the names of the wit- 
 nesses were to bs concealed, so that whether they testified 
 truly or falsely they were certain of being shielded from 
 all responsibility. In short, it was the determination of 
 the friends of Miss R., in conformity with her wishes, not 
 to give publicity to her narrative, unless it became indis- 
 pensable to the cause of truth, nor then, until such dispo- 
 
24 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 sition had been made of the pending prosecutions of the 
 rioters, as to render such a course free from all just im- 
 putation of an attempt to interfere with the public justice. 
 
 Scarcely, however, had those trials before the Supreme 
 Court sitting at Cambridge terminated, when a still more 
 unjust attempt was made to injure the character of Miss 
 R., and hold her up to public indignation as the prime 
 mover of the conspiracy which led to the destruction of 
 the Ursuline Convent. This wholly unprovoked attack 
 came from a person of high standing in the community, 
 holding the office of judge of probate of the county of 
 Middlesex, who had been for six years a patron of the 
 Convent, and one of the most zealous defenders of the 
 faith that Catholic Nunneries were the best schools for 
 the education of the daughters of republican Protestants. 
 The peculiar relation in which that individual stood to the 
 Convent will best appear by quoting the language of the 
 respectable counsel lor the delendant in the trial of John 
 R. Buzzell. 
 
 Mr. Mann, one of the counsel, said to the jury — " I do 
 not think Judge Fay is sensible his feelings are excited, 
 b Jt it seems to me that he comes here highly excited. Is 
 it not strange that he can recollect the voice [of the prison- 
 er] and not a word that he said ? He thinks that the 
 prisoner is guilty, and that blood should be shed, and I 
 submit, that every thing he sees and hears operates to the 
 prejudice of the prisoner." 
 
 Mr. Farley said — ' ; I would next call your attention to 
 Judge Fay's testimony ; and in the outset I tell you, with- 
 out any unfavorable feeling toward Judge Fav, whom I 
 highly esteem, that he does not know himself, he does 
 not know his own feelings, or he would not have told you 
 that he could have tried a person for this crime immediate- 
 ly after, with impartiality. Both Mr. Thaxter and Judge 
 Fay are insensibly under the influence of feeling in this 
 matter, arising from their having friends at the Convent, 
 and being themselves the supporters and patrons of the 
 institution, and having entire confidence in its excellency 
 and purity. Believing so, and having placed their chil- 
 dren there, it was natural they should wish to prove the 
 institution a good one. These circumstances justify the 
 belief, that Judge Fay, as high as his character stands, 
 cannot possibly be an impartial witness in this causa " 
 
INTRODUCTION. 25 
 
 It was under these impressions, and an apparent ex- 
 treme irritation at the acquittal of Buzzell, that Judge Fay 
 published a communication in the Boston Courier of 
 January 5, 1835, in which he recklessly charged the editor 
 of that paper, as the editor himself says, ^with a direct 
 agency in producing the destruction of the Convent." 
 
 It. will also be seen, by the following extract, that in the 
 beginning of his letter he attributes the mob to a para- 
 graph in the newspapers, while in the close he represents 
 the destruction of the Convent as the object and result of 
 the " pious labors" of Miss R. for the last two or three 
 years. 
 
 Extract from Judge Fay's Letter. 
 
 "I verily believe there would have been no mob on 
 Monday night, but for the paragraph first published in the 
 Mercantile Journal of Saturday, and copied into the Courier 
 of Monday, headed "mysterious." And here let me say, 
 that the editors of those papers have never, as I believe, 
 made any apology for the publication of that paragraph, 
 which may have been the immediate cause of the outrages 
 of that night. The editor of the Journal has even under- 
 taken to justify it, and to complain of being injured by the 
 very gentle rebuke for it, contained in the Report of the 
 Boston Inves' ; gating Committee. I would now only ask, 
 whether any respectable editor in Boston would dare to 
 publish such a paragraph implicating the character or con- 
 duct of the humblest citizen, upon no better authority than 
 mere street rumor '?" 
 
 Immediately after uttering this indignant rebuke against 
 editors for implicating the character and conduct ef even 
 the humblest citizen, upon no better authority than street 
 rumor, the judge illustrates the influence of his own moral 
 maxim upon himself, by proceeding forthwith to indite a 
 gross and unprovoked libel upon a respectable young lady, 
 without having even so much as the authority of " street 
 rumor" for the calumnies he has published. 
 
 Conclusion of Judge Fay's Letter to the Editor of the 
 Courier of Jan. 5, 1835. 
 " The causes which led to the destruction of the Con- 
 vent—the circumstances attending the transaction— the 
 difficulty of bringing the actors to justice, are fit subjects 
 
26 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 for the investigation of the philosophic historian. The 
 extraordinary fact, that while John R. Buzzell, the New 
 Hampshire brickinaker, recently accused, tried, and ac- 
 quitted, as one of the incendiaries, had his pockets filled 
 with money, and received such other marks of popular 
 sympathy and acknowledgment for his services and suffer- 
 ings in the cause of true religion, as to demand of him a 
 public card of thanks, no minister or member of a Protes- 
 tant society in the country, as far as I have heard, has 
 ever proposed a contribution for the unfortunate Ursulines 
 who lost their all by this flagrant violation of their rights ; 
 this is matter for 'our special wonder.' The time will 
 come, I trust, when all these matters will be rightly under- 
 stood. As to the state of popular feeling which produced 
 this catastrophe, if that be a mystery, a careful review of 
 some of the religious journals of the day may in part ex- 
 plain it. On that point, I will tako the liberty to refer 
 you to a certain Miss Rebecca Theresa Reed, alias Re- 
 becca Mary Agnes Theresa Reed, (as Goldsmith says, I 
 love to give the whole name,) a Catholic Protestant, as 
 she termed herself in court the other day, who has been 
 about Boston and the vicinity for ihc last two or three 
 years, announcing herself as ' the humble instrument in the 
 hands of Providence to destroy the institution at Mount 
 Benedict.' As the great object of her pious labors has 
 been accomplished, I doubt not she will be proud to in- 
 form you how she did it. It is possible that a book which 
 it is rumored she is about to publish relative to the Nun- 
 nery, may afford the desired information ; but as there is 
 reason to apprehend* that the manuscript, Avhich has been 
 extensively read, may undergo considerable pruning and 
 purgation to suit the views of the publisher, it is quite 
 doubtful if you will be able to get the whole truth, or in- 
 deed any unvarnished truth, by reading it. I should there- 
 fore advise to apply directly to herself. If she be as 
 obliging and communicative since, as she was before the 
 achievement of the great work, I doubt not that you may 
 be Yery much enlightened in all the remaining unex- 
 
 {)lained mysteries connected with a transaction, which has 
 eft an indelible stain on the character of this part of the 
 country; exciting the grief of our friends and the pity of 
 our enemies. 
 
 I have travelled a step or two beyond the limited object 
 
INTRODUCTION. 2? 
 
 of this communication, but I trust my motive, which is 
 
 truth, and the correction of error, will be thought a suffi- 
 cient justification. 
 
 Your obedient servant, 
 
 SAMUEL P. P. FAY. 
 Cambridge, Jan. 2, 183o. 
 Up to this period, Miss II. had never published a line 
 relating to the Convent, nor authorized any publication 
 that had been made. Her situation unavoidably subjected 
 her to many painful inquiries, (among others to those of 
 the lady uf Judge Fay himself,) but it is believed that she 
 uniformly conducted with a discretion and prudence in re- 
 lation to any statement she has made, which it would be 
 difficult for any young lady in her situation to excel. All 
 the excitement attendant upon her escape from the Con- 
 vent, if there ever were any, had subsided long before Miss 
 Harrison eloped Irom that place, and returned under cir- 
 cumstances furnishing abundant materials for popular ex- 
 citement. 
 
 The escape of Miss R., in 1832, was never mentioned 
 in a single newspaper, nor made known to any but her 
 friends, and no public allusion was ever made to it, until 
 after the burning of the Convent. On the other hand, the 
 elopement of. Miss Harrison, in 1834, was immediately 
 made the subject of newspaper mystery and speculation"; 
 and yet Miss R. is censured as the enemy of the Convent, 
 and Miss Harrison applauded as its friend! Miss R. 
 rerlainly has much the highest claim to the praise of dis- 
 cretion. . Her elopement never got into the newspapers, as 
 f reedy as news catchers would have been to have seized it. 
 !ut other real or pretended elopements Irom the Convent, 
 previous to that of Bliss R., were made matter of comment 
 in the newspapers, so as to call for a public denial on the 
 part of the friends of the institution, as will be seen by the 
 following, from the organ of the Catholics in Boston. 
 [From the Jesuit of July 23. 1831.] 
 
 "A lying report has been for some time going the 
 rounds of the Calvinistic presses, relative to the elopement 
 of a pious girl from the Mount Benedict Institution at 
 Charlestown. False! false!! false!!! Messrs. Parsons, 
 you know it to be so." 
 
 The inference, therefore, is obvious, that Miss R. avoided 
 
28 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 any publicity that would lead to an excitement against the 
 Convent. For nearly three years before the destruction 
 of the Convent, she had been living in the bosom of her 
 own family, an exemplary member of the Episcopal 
 Church, industriously applying herself, as far as her shat- 
 tered health would admit, to acquiring and giving instruc- 
 tion to young ladies in music and ornamental work. To 
 suppose for a moment that a mere girl, not twenty years 
 of age, and so situated, could possess the power, or the 
 means, or the disposition to do what the Boston Commit- 
 tee and Judge Fay so unjustly attribute to her agency, viz. 
 " fomenting to hatred the popular aversion" against the 
 Convent, " by representations injurious to the moral repu- 
 tation of the members of that Community," and forming a 
 conspiracy " to destroy the institution at Mount Benedict," 
 " as the great object of her pious labors," requires a cre- 
 dulity not surpassed by that which enables a devout Ca- 
 tholic actually to believe in the identical transubstantiation 
 of a wafer into the flesh of the Savior ! It would disparage 
 the common sense of Judge Fay, much more of the Boston 
 Committee, to suppose they believe any such thing. And 
 yet, in grave documents emanating from both these sources, 
 we find a young girl, moving in the humble walks of life, 
 whose character is without reproach, charged with de- 
 signing for three years, and carrying forward to its comple- 
 tion, in the midst of her simple avocation as the affection- 
 ate teacher of female children in music, a monstrous 
 conspiracy to get up a mob to destroy the Ursuline Con- 
 vent by violence ! If these intelligent gentlemen have 
 really brought their minds to compass such an absurdity as 
 this, they might be brought to invert one of the miracles of 
 sacred writ, and believe that Jonah swallowed the whale, 
 and not that the whale swallowed Jonah ! 
 
 It was not until this publication of Judge Fay appeared, 
 that Miss R. fully consented that her friends should j>ubL ; sh 
 her narrative, as the only means of placing before the 
 public all she had said and written in relation to the Con- 
 vent, from which it might be seen how injuriously she had 
 been misrepresented. The Report of the Boston Commit- 
 tee, though extremely unkind in other respects, was so far 
 decorous as to omit using her name. Judge Fay was des- 
 titute of this ordinary courtesy due to every reputable fe- 
 male who does not bring herself voluntarily before the 
 
INTRODUCTION. 29 
 
 public. To repel his harsh imputations at once, seemed 
 indispensable, and they were replied to by the following 
 communication in the Boston Courier of January 7, 1835, 
 which will explain many things connected with the nar- 
 rative. 
 
 REPLY TO JUDGE FAY. 
 
 Bostoii, January 5, 1835. 
 
 TO THE EDITOR OF THE COURIER I 
 
 Sir,— I have been much surprised by seeing, in a letter signed 
 "Samuel P. F. Fay," published in your paper of this morning, a 
 violent attack upon myself, making statements icholly false, and 
 adding inferences, which, I take it upon myself to say, no honest 
 and unprejudiced man would be guilty of, even in his own 
 thoughts, and much less in a letter sent to a public journal for 
 publication. Much as I am averse to allowing my name to come 
 before the public, in any manner, I cannot, in justice to myself, 
 remain silent when such a gross calumny has been put forth ; 
 and done, too, by one whose office gives him a claim to respect in 
 this community. In answering the calumnies contained in the 
 communication of Judge Fay, it will be necessary to enter a little 
 into particulars. In the first place, the judge " takes the liberty" 
 to refer to me, as one who is able to give some information upon the 
 causes of the "popular feeling 1 ' which produced the destruction 
 of the Convent. In answer to this reference, I can only say, that 
 it is impossible for me to account for the popular feeling in any 
 other manner than that in which the learned judge himself ac- 
 counted for it, when on the stand and under oath, viz. to the cir- 
 cumstances attending the escape of Mrs. Mary John. He then 
 stated (under oath) that he knew of no other cause for the excite- 
 ment which had caused the catastrophe. I can say with equal 
 sincerity, that I also know of no other cause ; and that to have it 
 ascribed to me, as having in the least degree contributed to the 
 excitement, is as base a calumny as was ever fabricated. 
 
 My conversation with regard to that institution, since I left it, 
 has been confined to very few persons. No conversation of impor- 
 tance, with regard to it, had ever been held by me (up to the time 
 of its destruction) with but two persons. One of them is the reve- 
 rend gentleman of whose church I am now a member, and the 
 other is a resident in the country. I have sometimes been pressed 
 with questions concerning it, but have always avoided them as 
 much as possible ; and though I have answered some questions, I 
 have not (up to the time above mentioned) given any information 
 with regard to the institution, (to any other than the gentlemen 
 before named.) further than general statements ; such as, that I 
 did not approve of the institution, and should not advise any of 
 the young ladies among my friends to go there ; that I disapproved 
 •if the discipline of the institution, thinking much of it to be too 
 
30 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 So careful have I been not to be in any measure the cause of an 
 excitement against that institution, that I did not permit even my 
 own sisters to read the manuscript which I had written concerning 
 it. And now, that it should be publicly saii of me, by one who 
 holds a seat upon the judge's bench, that I have been the cause 
 of the " popular feeling" of which he speaks, is an invasion of 
 defenceless female innocence, if possible, more barbarous than 
 that invasion of private rights, which has called forth so much 
 public discussion. 
 
 The learned judge says I "termed" myself, when in court, a 
 "Catholic Protestant"— for the purpose, no doubt, of holding me 
 up to ridicule. In answer to this small wit, it is only necessary 
 to say, that such an expression is a contradiction in terms which 
 I did not make use of. I stated, that I was a Catholic Episcopa- 
 lian ; and I say so still. 
 
 But the most important misrepresentation which the judge has 
 done me the honor to make, is in a paragraph to which he puts 
 quotation marks, as if the words were actually mine. In answer 
 to this, in the first place I would state, that all which is exception- 
 able in the paragraph is false. With regard to the origin from 
 which this paragraph has been made, it will be necessary to 
 mention a few details. About a year ago, Mrs. Fay was (appa- 
 rently) quite desirous to have some conversation with me upon 
 that institution : to this end, she sent me two notes requesting me 
 to call on her for that purpose. I had (as above stated) always 
 endeavored to avoid particular conversation upon the subject ; but 
 in this instance, knowing that Mrs. Fay haa a daughter in the 
 institution, I thought it my duty to give her all the information I 
 could with propriety. I therefore answered her first note, inform- 
 ing her that if she would call on me, I would give her all the in- 
 formation in my power. To this she sent another note, again 
 requesting me to call on her : of which last I took no notice, being 
 thankful that she wanted the information so little, as to give me 
 an excuse for not giving it. A short time after, however, I went 
 there to obtain a piano-forte, which I had been informed could be 
 had upon application : I was in hopes that I should not see 
 Mrs. Fay, but was disappointed. She immediately commenced 
 asking me a variety of questions about the Convent, and I could 
 not avoid having some conversation with her upon the subject. 
 I answered her questions in general terms, as I had previously 
 answered similar questions to other persons, without entering into 
 any particulars, and ending the conversation as soon as politeness 
 would permit. Previous to leaving, however, some general re- 
 mark* were made on both sides ; and upon her part some remarks 
 directed to me, of a more kindly nature than any which she had 
 previously made. In this connection I said, that "I hoped to be 
 a humble instrument in the hands of Providence of showing my 
 friends the truth." This is what was said, and nothing different 
 was said. The remark applied to me by Judge Fay I never made, 
 nor any thing nearer to it than the one above quoted. Thus it 
 
INTRODUCTION. 31 
 
 will be seen, that yourself is not the only one to whom the learned 
 judge has done great injustice. 
 
 "With regard to the manuscript which the judge speaks of, it is 
 true that I have written one; but that it has been "extensively 
 read," is not true. Whether it will be published or not, it is unne- 
 cessary to answer. If however it should be published, there will 
 bo no "pruning or purgation," as is feared by the learned judge, 
 but it will, on tru contrary, be more full and explicit than was 
 originally intended ; for when written, it was not intended for 
 publication. 
 
 I am. very respectfully, your obedient servant, 
 
 R. THERESA REED. 
 
 We take it for granted that no person, of ordinary good 
 breeding, can justify the rude and unprovoked attack 
 which a dignified judge, who is legally the guardian of 
 the orphan, has made upon an orphan girl, in this commu- 
 nication to the editor of the Courier. What manly feeling. 
 or what sense of justice, could have prompted this sneer? 
 — " a certain Miss Rebecca Theresa Reea, alias Rebecca 
 Mary Agnes Theresa Reed ; as Goldsmith says, I love to 
 give the whole name." Why did not the judge, while in 
 this witty humor, exercise his ridicule upon the Lady Su- 
 perior, who styled herself, when in court, by the whole 
 name of " Mrs. President, Ma Mere, Mary Ann, Ursula, 
 Lady Superior, Edmond, St. George, Moffatt?" The 
 judge himself is not deficient in names ! 
 
 Not content with this, the judge totally misrepresents 
 a fact, in saying that Miss R. termed herself, in court, " a 
 "Catholic Protestant." She did not. Chief Justice 
 Shaw asked her, as he did all the female witnesses, "Are 
 you a Catholic? Her answer was, I am a Catholic Epis- 
 copalian. Chief Justice. Do you believe in the Catrnlic 
 Church? Ans. ' 1 believe in the Holy Catholic Church,' 
 but not iu the Roman Catholic Church. Chief Justice. 
 Do you acknowledge the supremacy of the Pope ? Ans. 
 No, Sir, by no means ; I am a member of the Protestant 
 Episcopal Church." — It would seem difficult to find mate- 
 rials for ridicule in answers so proper and becoming as 
 these. 
 
 But the most remarkable part of the judge's letter, is 
 the proof he grjivoly gives of Miss R.'s design to burn 
 down the Convent, by the assertion that some two years 
 before the riot, she declared that " she hoped to be a hum- 
 ble instrument, in the hands r>{ Providence, to destroy the 
 
32 INTRORUCTrON. 
 
 institution at Mount Benedict:" and this, infers the judge, 
 is conclusive evidence that a girl of nineteen was then 
 getting up a conspiracy to burn down the Convent ! 
 
 What a terrible incendiary Martin Luther must have 
 been, on this principle, for when threatened with persecu- 
 tion from Rome, he wrote to Spalatinus — " Let them con- 
 demn me and burn my books, and if in return I do not. 
 publicly condemn and bum the whole mass of pontifical 
 law, it will be because I cannot find fire. The Lord will 
 I doubt not, finish his own work, either through me as his 
 instrument or through another." 
 
 In truth, the Lord did make Luther the instrument of de- 
 stroying jive hundred and seventy-six monastic establish- 
 ments in England alone, the annual revenues of which, to 
 the Monks and Nuns with their vows of "poverty,'" were 
 £132,000, more than half a million of dollars, besides 
 plate and jewels to the value of £100,000 more ! In fact, 
 as the history of those times says, "one of the first effects 
 of the Reformation was the destruction of the religious 
 houses." 
 
 Was that any reason that Luther should have held his 
 
 J»eace ? The Boston Committee think so in their Report, 
 or they say, " there can be no doubt that a conspiracy was 
 formed, extending into many of the neighboring towns, but 
 the Committee are of opinion that it embraced very few 
 of respectable character in society, though some such may 
 be accounted guilty of an offence no less heinous, morally 
 considered, in having excited the feelings which led to the 
 design." 
 
 Here in one sentence we have all the authors of state- 
 me-its injurious to the Nunnery, whether true or false, 
 including Dr. Beecher for preaching against Popery, shook 
 up together in the same bag with the rioters who set fire 
 to the Convent ! Verily Martin Luther was a rioter in- 
 stead of a reformer, for he "excited the feelings" that led 
 to very many bloody wars and persecutions, in which all 
 Europe was involved for years. 
 
 Protestant Ameri?an citizens, Avho regard it as a heinous 
 moral offence to tell the truth and expose the danger and 
 folly of educating the daughters of frer>. republicans at 
 Catholic Convents, must assuredly approve of the eulo- 
 gium the infidel historian Hume pronounces on Pope Leo 
 the Tenth, " whose sound judgment, moderation, and 
 
INTRODUCTION. 33 
 
 temper were well qualified to retard the progress of the 
 Reformation." 
 Miss R. therefore, even had she used the precise lan- 
 
 §uage Judge Fay ascribes to her, might have quoted an 
 lustrious example. Luther had seen the abuses of the 
 Romish Church, as she had seen those of the Convent at 
 Charlestown, and when his enemies proposed to stipulate 
 for his silence, and even his friends feared he was going 
 too far, he exclaimed, " I will not be guilty of an impious 
 silence, and of the neglect of divine truth, and of so many 
 thousand precious souls." And yet Luther's single as- 
 sertion stood ibr some time against the testimony of the 
 whole hierarchy of Rome, and had Christians taken their 
 denials where "would have been the Reformation? So if 
 the Protestants of the present day admit the denials of the 
 members of Catholic Convents as conclusive against the 
 statements of all seceders from such institutions, who 
 alone can carry into the world a knowledge of its secret 
 discipline, will it not amount to an entire immunity to 
 such establishments for any abuses or follies they may 
 practise ? 
 
 But it is not true that Miss R. took any pains to dis- 
 seminate her opinions of t'i-3 Nunnery. On the contrary, 
 she uniformly refrained from doing no. unless under cir- 
 cumstances where she felt called upon by a sense of duty 
 and the inquiries of those interested in knowing the truth. 
 One of the few conversations she held on this subject, after 
 she left the Convent, was the one Which Judge Fay has 
 brought before the public, and misrepresented, with marked 
 disregard to delicacy, because the conversation he uses to 
 establish his charge of conspiracy against Miss R. was 
 held with his own wife, at her argent solicitation. This 
 we will prove. In 1833, Miss R. was a pupil in the 
 Cambridgeport Academy, nearly opposite the residence of 
 Judge Fay. Mrs. Fay called on her there, and requested 
 an interview relative to the Convent, in which she had 
 daughters. Miss R. declined calling. The earnestness 
 with which the interview was pressed, will appear front 
 the following notes, which the judge has obliged the 
 friends of Miss R. to publish. 
 
 "Mrs. Fay will be at home this morning, and wouldbe happy 
 to have a few moments' conversation with Miss Reed after school 
 this morning, if it would ba agreeable to Miss Reed, in relation to 
 
34 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 the Convent. Mrs. Fay only wishes to know if certain reports 
 which she hae heard are true. 
 "Friday morning." 
 
 [Miss R. replied in a note, declining to call at the resi- 
 dence of Mrs. F., but expressing a willingness to have that 
 lady call on her. The answer to this note was as fol- 
 lows.] 
 
 " Mrs. Fay will not be able to call and see Miss Reed this after- 
 noon, as b-he is going to Boston. She is much obliged to Mis.? Reed 
 for her polite note, and will be happy to have Miss Reed call any- 
 day next week, eithe- before or after school. 
 
 " Saturday morning." 
 
 A conversation, drawn from an artless young lady, by 
 such earnest and kind solicitations as these, certainly 
 ought not to have been treasured up nearly two years, and 
 then made public, in a distorted form, in order to charge 
 upon her a conspiracy to incite a mob to commit arson 
 and burglary. 
 
 We know it has been thrown out, by way of threat, that 
 should Miss R. suffer her narrative to be published, her 
 veracity would be destroyed by means of spies in the 
 guise of friends, who had watched her ever since she es- 
 caped from the Convent, and taken down her conversa- 
 tions in writing, in order to detect her in some contradic- 
 tions. That such a cold-blooded, Jesuitical system of 
 espionage can have been introduced into this enlightened 
 community, and practised for the ruin of a voung lady, 
 we shall believe when we see these pretended records of 
 Miss R.'s conversation published, and not before. We 
 certainly acquit so respectable a lady as Mrs. F. of any 
 design to entrap Miss R. oy kind solicitations into a con- 
 versation that was to be used, at some future period, to hei 
 injury. 
 
 But there is one fact which we cannot withhold in this 
 connection, as it will account for the spirit of extreme 
 hostility with which Miss R. has been pursued, ever since 
 her escape from the Convent, and her renunciation of the 
 Roman Ca.nolic faith. We quote from the "Jesuit," 
 published in Boston, the organ of Romanism in New 
 England, fr-n which it will be seen that whenever a 
 Catholic changes his religion, the dogma of the church 
 enjoms that he is never afterward to be trusted or believed 
 in any thing; and is to be driven, by persecutions, to in- 
 
INTRODUCTION. 35 
 
 temperance, madness, or suicide. That these are the ter- 
 rors held out to apostates from Popery, cannot be mistak- 
 en from the following language. 
 
 [From the Boston Jesuit of 1631.] 
 
 " Whenever a Catholic changes bis religion, his motives 
 and conduct are to be invariably suspected, and his honesty 
 to be never trusted. Never did such apostates become 
 thereby more moral or religious. Faith being the free 
 gift ofGod to man, may be lost by an individual not keep- 
 ing it active by the penormance of the moral and religious, 
 duties which an incarnate God and his Church inculcate 
 and enforce. 
 
 But conscience, with her thousand tongues, will cry out 
 in the midst of festive gayety, in darkness or solitude, 
 against such deep and davming- perfidy, and the unfortu- 
 nate victim, iu all the abasement of guilt, to palliate his 
 mental torture, will have recourse to the stupefying bowl^ 
 or terminate his career by suicide.' 1 ' 
 
 Need we marvel that :; mother Church" is infallible in the 
 eyes of her votaries, when such are the arguments used 
 against a Catholic turning Protestant ? Need we wonder if 
 even deranged fugitives from Convents should be sudden- 
 ly restored to their senses, and voluntarily return to their 
 mental prison, as the only means to escape such a terrible 
 anathema ? How conveniently, in case ofthe sudden death 
 of an " apostate" this doctrine of a guilty conscience im- 
 pelling to suicide would " cover it all over like a cloak." 
 We bring no accusation ; we merely trace avowed doc- 
 trines to their legitimate consequences ; and we ask, if the 
 above article really embodies the true spirit with which 
 the Nuns of the Convent, the Bishop and Priests, and the 
 Catholics generally, view the secession of Miss R. from 
 their order, ought she not to be an object of the lively 
 sympathy, and the zealous protection of Protestant Chris- 
 tians, instead of being pursued and persecuted by them 
 also, as the unconscious instruments of the vengeance of 
 the former ? 
 
 One word as to the intimation that the Narrative of 
 Miss R., as now puolished, has undergone "pruning and 
 purgation to suit the publisher." It has neither been 
 pruned nor expurgated, to suit the views of any body. It 
 contains everv fact which it contained when committed to 
 
36 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 writing by Miss It between two and three \enrs ago. 
 The form in which it is now published is a revision of the 
 original draft by Miss R., under the r.dvice of judicious 
 friends, bui the language, the thoughts, the facts and the 
 inferences are wholly ner's, with a few unimportant cor- 
 rections. We repeat, that not a fact contained in the 
 original Narrative has been suppressed, and these are all 
 the facts which Miss R. has at any time authorized to 
 " pass under the sanction of her name." If she knows facts 
 more injurious to the character of the Convent, they have 
 not been disclosed ; and a discreet public can judge from 
 this Narrative with how much justice the Boston Com- 
 mittee, in their Report, have ascribed to Miss R. the origin 
 of the excitement that led to the riot of the 11th of August. 
 We cannot so well describe the circumstances under 
 which the Narrative was at first prepared, as they are re- 
 lated in the following communication on that subject, ad- 
 dressed to us by Miss R. last October. 
 
 TO MV RESPECTED FRIEND3 : 
 
 ' Seon after I left the TJrauline Community on 3Iounl Benedict, 
 Charlestown, I felt it my duty and privilege to resume the connec 
 tion which, before I became a convert to Romanism, I held with 
 the Protestant Episcopal Church, in Cambridge. I accordingly 
 applied to the Rev. Mr. C the pastor of Christ Church. Boston, 
 with whom I had consulted previously to my joining the Catholics. 
 I related to him, as my pastor and spiritual adviser, the circum- 
 stances which led to the temporary renunciation of the f tith in 
 which I was brought up by my pious mother. 
 
 Before the death of my mother, she took care to have myself 
 and two sisters baptized, at the Episcopal Church in Cambridge, 
 by the Rev. Mr. Doane, then of Trinity Church, Boston, now aii 
 Episcopal Bishop of New Jersey. 
 
 It was the daily prayer of my beloved mother that her children 
 might be brought up in the ways of religion and truth. Accord- 
 ingly she gave my two younger sisters and myself to the Episco- 
 pal Church in baptism. Previous to her death she summoned 
 us to her bed, in presence of my father and one of our sponsors, 
 and reminded us of the solemn obligation we had taken on our- 
 selves in the ordinance of baptism, and said that she knew of no 
 truer religion than that of the Church of England ; that if there 
 was a holier people, we had only to seek, and we should find them. 
 And here I should do well to call to mind other advice and 
 requests which she made : although her body sleeps in the dust, the 
 remembrance of her dying words is still fresh In my mind. 
 
 When I threw off the strong delusion under which I had been 
 Induced to embrace Romanism or the Catholic religion, and my 
 
INTRODUCTION. 37 
 
 mind waa left at liberty to reflect on the dying words of my de- 
 parted mother, I sought consolation in the Episcopal Church. la 
 doing this, and in applying to tb? Rev. Mr. C. for readrnission to 
 the church, I felt it my duty, in returning as a lost sheep to the 
 fold, to open my whole heart, and disclose all the circumstances 
 that led to my wandering from the truth and embracing the Ro- 
 man Catholic faith — my introduction to the Ursuline Community — 
 a narrative of my residence there— the circumstances which 
 caused me to doubt the purity of their faith and practice— my con- 
 sequent elopement from the Convent, and my renunciation of 
 Romanism. And my present pastor can bear me witness that I 
 have never expressed any desire to injure the Convent or bring 
 unjust reproacii on the Catholic religion, but to do my duty as I 
 conscientiously believed I ought to do, in telling the truth, on my 
 application for readrnission to the Episcopal Church ; and leave the 
 event to the wise Disposer of all things. 
 
 At the time I related the facts contained in this Narrative to the 
 Rev. Mr. O, he advised me as soon as I was able to put In 
 writing all that I had learned and experienced of Roman Catho- 
 licism while among them, and while in the Convent. At first I was 
 able to make only memoranda, but I have at last endeavored, in 
 my own simple language, to place them together in something 
 like the form of a narrative, for your perusal. 
 
 The above are t lie circumstances under which this short account 
 has been drawn up; and I have now explained to you the motives 
 for this narrative of the most interesting and distressing period of 
 my life. R. THERESA REED. 
 
 Among the many unkind things said of Miss R., an at- 
 tempt has been made to impute ingratitude to her, because 
 she was received at the Convent as a charity scnolar. Mrs. 
 Moffat*, the Superior, in her testimony, said, " Miss R. 
 was received from motives of charity ;" and the Report of 
 the Boston Committee, taking the alleged fact solely from 
 the Superior, says, " her means of knowledge were derived 
 from her having become a voluntary inmate of the house, 
 for the purpose of receiving a gratuitous education." 
 
 Had disinterested benevolence been the motive which 
 led to the admission of Miss R. to the Convent, those who 
 could exercise such benevolence would not have publicly 
 reproached her with ingratitude on that score. But the 
 Superior proved, while under oath, that the object was not 
 charity, but the pecuniary interest of the school. We 
 quote the following from the cross examination of the Su- 
 perior, in answer to questions put by Mr. Farley. 
 
 " Miss Reed cams as a charity scholar. She was em- 
 ployed in attending to her education. Question* What 
 
38 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 was the design of educating her? Answer. To privare 
 her to instruct in the school. Mr. Farley. Then after she 
 was taught sufficiently to instruct in the school, would she 
 not have been an acquisition to the Community ? Answer. 
 Certainly." 
 
 This is the same kind of charity which a master bestows 
 upon his apprentice the first six months. Miss R., when 
 she appliea for admission to the Convent, was found to 
 possess a fine talent for music, which she has since de- 
 veloped. As an instructer in music, therefore, had she re- 
 mained at the Convent after the six months, her services 
 would have been highly important. The receipts from 
 sixty scholars were not less than ten thousand dollars per 
 annum, and there were but eight teachers, so that Miss 
 R.'s proportion of labor, when qualified to instruct in music, 
 would have been twelve hundred per annum. "Charity" 
 like this was certainly casting a single loaf of bread upon 
 the waters, with a certainty of receiving a v, hole cargo in 
 return. 
 
 Nor was this all. Miss R. was well skilled in orna- 
 mental needle-work, as the ornaments of the altar and the 
 robe of the Bishop can bear witness, and her industry in 
 that department was a full equivalent for all the " charity" 
 she received at the Convent. We will prove this out of 
 the mouths of the Catholics themselves, by quoting the 
 following article referring to Miss R. just before she en- 
 tered the Convent. 
 
 [From the Boston Jesuit of August G, 1831.] 
 
 " We have frequently heard and noticed the anti-christian pre- 
 judice which a conversion from sectarianism to the Holy Catholic 
 Church, produces in the minds of the unconverted friends and 
 relatives of the new convert. 
 
 " A young lady (meaning Miss R.) who lived not a great distance 
 from Boston, became a convert a few months ago. This so exas- 
 perated her father, that she was obliged to leave the house. She 
 found a shelter in the house of a worthy Catholic family. She is 
 very capable of obtai7iins: a livelihood, by her knowledge of the 
 various branches of necdleicork. Passing over a certain bridge, 
 not very far from this city, she was met by a brother, who unnatural- 
 ly exclaimed that very little icould induce him to throip her into 
 the water. He fortunately did not violate the majesty of the law. 
 Happy privilege of the private judgment principle ! edifying de- 
 monstration of its practical results ! "Read th^. Bible and judge for 
 youreelf, says the minister. When one does so. and thereby be- 
 
INTRODUCTION. 39 
 
 comes a Catholic, he is forthwith denounced, yes, and but too often 
 persecuted. Strange logic this! happy coincidence of principle 
 and practice !' ; 
 
 We have introduced this extract merely to sh> w that be- 
 fore Miss R. was received into the Convent, it was well 
 understood by her Catholic friends, that she was very capa- 
 ble of obtaining a livelihood, by the precise kind of still 
 which was particularly wanted in the decorations of the 
 Convent. But as this extract from the Jesuit contains 
 many false statements never derived from Miss R. or her 
 friends, but invented by the Priest who wrote it, we sub- 
 join the following declaration made by the brother of Miss 
 R., which is also fully assented to by her father. 
 
 The subscriber is the only brother of R. Theresa Reed, who was 
 in the Convent at Charlestown for some time. He and all the 
 family were always opposed to Theresa's going to the Convent, 
 and did all they could to persuade her not to go there, but never 
 used any other mean3 than advice. Theresa was livinir at home 
 with my father, and was under no necessity to seek admission to 
 the Convent as a charily to her. We always believed she was 
 overpersuaded by others to go there. Her father always opposed 
 her going there. He showed me, at the lime, a letter from the 
 Superior of the Convent to him, which said, "With your approba- 
 tion I shall receive your daughter, and give her two or three quar- 
 ters' instruction and fit her for a teacher." My father did n»t 
 consent, but told me he had sent word by Mrs. Locke, who did 
 washing at the Convent, to tell the Superior not to receive his 
 daughter, and that she had friends to provide for her. 
 
 A short time before my sister went into the Convent, I met her 
 on Charlestown bridge, the only time I ever remember meeting 
 her there. I tried to persuade her from going into the Convent, 
 which she seemed very anxious to do, and wished me to go with 
 her to see the Superior. I declined doing so, and said I should 
 rather follow her to her grave than have her go there. In that 
 and no other conversation I never used any threat toward her, 
 which it would have been impossible for me to do at any time : 
 and the story which afterwards appeared in the Jesuit, that I had 
 threatened to throw her off the bridge, or used any threat, is & 
 felsehood from beginning t< end. w ^ c j^™ , 
 
 Many persons who will read this Narrative, and hare 
 read the Boston Report, may suppose that they are called 
 upon to decide between the veracity of the influential citi- 
 zens who signed that report, and so humble an individual 
 as Miss R. It is not so. These gentlemen do not assert 
 a single fact or belief, in their own knowledge, which af- 
 
40 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 fects the correctness of Miss R.'s statement. Wherever 
 there is any contradiction in matter of fact, it rests between 
 Miss R. arid the inmates of the Convent, relating to facts 
 of a secret nature, which none but the Nuns, the Novitiates, 
 and the Priests could know. The Superior, when under 
 oath, admitted that Miss R. " would know every thing 
 which took place during the time she was with us, except- 
 ing what occurred in the school room." 
 
 It is therefore simply a question of personal veracity, and 
 of internal and external evidence of truth. Such being the 
 case, and Miss R. having been presented in an unfavora- 
 ble and unjust light, in the Report of the Boston Com- 
 mittee, it has seemed to her friends that it was due to her 
 and due to truth, that the estimation in which she is held 
 by those who know her best, should be made public at 
 this time, as ample proof that she has friends to protect her 
 from injustice. 
 
 The subjoined certificates were given shortly after the 
 publication of the Report of the Boston Committee, and 
 though many more, respectable names, might be obtained, 
 the number and character of those given must satisfy every 
 candid mind, that few young ladies of twenty, in any circle, 
 could produce better "evidence of their being entitled to 
 confidence and esteem. 
 
 I hereby certify that Miss Rebecca T. Reed has been, for mora 
 than two years last past, a communicant at Christ Church ; that I 
 have always regarded her as a devout person and exemplary in 
 her Christian walk and conversation ; that I repose great confi- 
 dence in her sincerity and intention to relate, on all occasions, 
 what she believes to be the truth. 
 
 WILLIAM CROSWELL, 
 Rector of Christ Church, Boston. 
 
 October 20th, 1834. 
 
 Cambridgeport, October 3d, 1831. 
 
 This certifies that Miss R. Theresa Reed attended the Cam- 
 bridgeport Academy several months within the last year. It 
 gives me pleasure to add, that s* far as my knowledge extended, 
 her conduct during this time was uniformly eood. 
 \ SAMUEL ADAMS, 
 
 Principal of Cambridgeport Academy. 
 
 We the subscribers, having been acquainted with Miss Rebecca 
 Theresa Reed, previous to her becoming a member of the Ursuline 
 Community at Mount Benedict, Charlestown, and since leaving 
 that institution, feel it due te the cause of truth and justice to sajr. 
 that we consider her a person entitled to our confidence, sua* 
 
INTRODUCTION. 41 
 
 taining as she does a character distinguished for love of truth, for 
 unexceptionable morals, and for meek and modest deportment. 
 And we feel it our duty to give, and cheerfully do give, this our 
 testimonial, to be used by her and her friends as they shall deem 
 most expedient. 
 
 September 26, 1834. 
 
 Boston. — James Day, Ebenezer F. Gay. 
 
 Lexington. — Jonathan Munroe, Rhoda Munroe, Susan E. Mun- 
 roe, John Viles, Sally D. Viles, Sarah H. Viles, William L. Smith, 
 Solomon Harrington, Betsey Harrington. 
 
 Woburn. — Luke Wyman, Ruth Wyman, Ruthy B. Wyman, 
 Lucy Wyman, Seth Wyman, Sarah R. Wyman, Bill Russell, 
 John Wade, Hannah Wade, John F. Harris, Phebe Harris, Ed- 
 mun Parker, Thaddeus Parker. 
 
 Medford.— Anna Teel, Anna Briant, Leonard Bucknam. Anna 
 Bucknam, Matilda Johnson. 
 
 Cragie's Point. — Elijah Wheeler. 
 
 Charlestown. — Stephen Symmes, Priscilla Symmes, John 
 Swan, Samuel Gardner, Priscilla Reed, Charles Gordon, Ezra 
 Welsh, Caleb Harrington, Sarah Gardner, Patience Gardner, Abi- 
 gail Tufts, Caroline Griffin, Nathan Field, Jacob Pasre, John 
 Tapley. 
 
 Cambridgeport. — E. F. Valentine, N. C. Valentine, Martha 
 Valentine, Jane Valentine, Moses B. Houghton, Almira Hough- 
 ton, Moses Ward, Ira Ward, Amos Hazeltine, Phebe Hazeltine, 
 Susan Hazeltine. 
 
 Cambridge. — Josiah Johnson, Jonathan Hunt, Betsey Hunt, 
 Ozias Morse, Sullivan B. Ball, William Hunnewell. 
 
 In comparing the Narrative of Miss R. with the Report 
 of the Boston Committee, we ask those who may suppose 
 they meet with any material contradiction, to bear in mind 
 that there is one error pervading nearly the whole of that 
 very able and forcible document. It is this — adopting as 
 facts the exculpatory and laudatory statements regarding 
 the Convent, made by the Superior and her Nuns, and the 
 Bishop and his Priests. Thus, the Committee vouch for 
 the propriety and tenderness of the penances imposed, of 
 which they knew nothing ; they assume a distinction be- 
 tween the Ursuline and other Nuns, which does not exist ; 
 declaring that they" are openly engaged in the most useful 
 and elevated offices of humanity in the presence of the 
 world," and that " their dwelling was accessible at proper 
 times to the parents and friends of its numerous inmates." 
 But how accessible ? Did any Protestant parent or guar- 
 dian ever see the school room, or the sleeping or eating 
 rooms in which fifty of their daughters were taught, fed, and 
 
42 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 lodged 1 No. Was there ever any examination or public 
 exercise of the scholars, which their parents were allowed 
 to witness ? None. Even Hon. S. P. P. Fay. who states 
 in his testimony on the trial of Buzzell that he had had 
 daughters in the Convent six years, and had visited it at 
 all times, also declares on oath — "I never saw the school 
 at the Convent, and never but once went beyond the par- 
 lor. When I wished to see my children, they were sent 
 into the parlor, and when I wished to see any of the 
 " Community," (their teachers,) saw them also in the par- 
 lor. The only time I went beyond the parlor, was once 
 when I saw the ceremony of taking the white veil," (pro- 
 bably in the chapel.) Levi Thaxter, Esq. another highly 
 intelligent Protestant patron of the Convent, testified that 
 he was never in the school, though he went to the Convent 
 very frequently. He saw his daughters in the parlor. 
 When he wished to see any one they were sent for. 
 
 This, then, is the whole amount of" the dwelling being 
 accessible at proper times to the parents and friends" of 
 the pupils there. They were admitted to a common parlor, 
 and not permitted to enter any other room in that spacious 
 establishment. No Protestant eye ever saw the apart- 
 ments of the Nuns, except on the occasion when the se- 
 lectmen of Charlestown examined the building by appoint- 
 ment, the day of the riot. Even the physician, as we 
 understand, never saw any of the Religieuse, to prescribe 
 for them, in their private apartments. When sick, they 
 were attended by the infirmarian, one of their own order. 
 
 An attempt to establish a Protestant school on such a 
 plan of secrecy as this, would not be tolerated by judicious 
 parents a moment. Are Catholic instructers of young 
 ladies more entitled to confidence in these respects than 
 Protestant teachers would be ? Suppose a community of 
 Episcopalian females should open a seminary for young 
 ladies, and admit no person to go beyond a certain common 
 visiting room. Suppose, that while they refused access to 
 all other men or women, they freely admitted to their most 
 private apartments, at all times of day or night, a number 
 of clergymen, of their own denomination, by whom they 
 were required to confess in private, without reserve, ail 
 their faults, wishes, and feelings, and submit to any penan- 
 ces these clergymen might impose on them, both sexes 
 being under a solemn vow, which debarred them from 
 
I N T R D U CTION. 43 
 
 ever marrying. Suppose one of the rules of the establish- 
 ment was never to enter a room without first knocking 
 three times, and waiting for the knocks to be returned. 
 Would such an institution, so conducted by Protestants, be 
 approved? 
 
 We ask a discreet and discerning community, to divest 
 themselves of the false notion that the seminary at Mount 
 Benedict was invested with a mysterious sanctity any- 
 more than our own colleges and schools. All the forms 
 of Protestant worship are observed at Harvard college, 
 but who thought of charging the young men with " sacri- 
 lege," and with intolerance to the Unitarian religion, when 
 they committed riots, and depredations upon property 
 there last summer, for which they were indicted ? Even 
 should our state be disgraced by a lawless mob burning 
 down the University chapel, in the impulse of a blind fury, 
 incited by vague rumors that a student, who had run 
 away, and been carried' back, had been put to deatii ; w r ho 
 would think of attributing the deed to " the deep-seated 
 repugnance to the" Unitarian " faith and form of worship 
 which exists in every" Orthodox "community?" Who 
 would call upon us, on this score, to lay aside our "preju- 
 dices" against Unitarianism ? 
 
 Where is the distinction between the two cases? The 
 Convent was either a religious establishment, for the wor- 
 ship of Roman Catholics, or it was a seminary of learning 
 lor the education of Protestant young ladies. If it were 
 ..he former, it was no place for Protestant children. If it 
 *-ere the latter, then it is entitled to no sanctity; its "ves- 
 sels" are no more " sacred," its " cross" is no more " holy," 
 ts " vestments" are no more " consecrated," than are the 
 furniture and wardrobe of the teachers of a Protestant 
 echool. Surely it will not be pretended that a Nunnery 
 "n one room of a building can sanctify a school kept in 
 •nother, by the Nuns themselves as teachers. 
 
 God forbid that we should say one word in extenuation 
 ii the outrage upon the Convent. It was every thing vile 
 which a midnight attack upon the dwelling of defenceless 
 females could be, where neither virtue nor life were sought 
 or assailed ; but we protest against the attempts that have 
 been made in reports, in legal arguments, and even in ju- 
 dicial charges, to exaggerate this outrage, as " a scene of 
 popular madness and of culpable official neglect, that can 
 
44 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 hardly find a parallel in that period of the French Revolu- 
 tion which will ever be remembered as the reign of ter- 
 ror." It was not an attack upon the religious worship of 
 the Roman Catholics, and it did not have its origin in " a- 
 spirit of intolerance, fatal to the genius of our institutions." 
 There are six hundred and forty Roman Catholic church- 
 es and mass houses in the United States, and who ever 
 heard of religious worship in any of them being disturbed ? 
 No longer ago than the 26th of October, 1834, a splendid 
 new Catholic cathedral at St. Louis, Missouri, was con- 
 secrated on Sunday, amidst the discharging of cannon 
 and the ringing of bells ! and later still, a Protestant 
 senator of Ohio, standing in the streets of Cincinnati, 
 was compelled to take his hat off, in honor to the Catholic 
 ceremony of the passing host. Here in our own city of 
 Boston, which we are striving so hard to brand with "in- 
 tolerance," what religious society has ever enjoyed more 
 privileges than have always been extended to the Catho- 
 lics ? Whose presses are more indulged in the full licen- 
 tiousness of attack upon their religious opponents, than 
 the two Catholic presses of Boston? One of them, the 
 Catholic Sentinel, not a month ago, held the following 
 excessively gross language, reflecting on tne purity of the 
 wives and daughters of all Protestant Christians who wor- 
 ship at the Methodist Episcopal Church. That paper of 
 February the 7th, 1835, speaking of a young man who had 
 been converted from the Catholic to the" Protestant religion, 
 says that " he is loved as an Adonis by these incontinent 
 women and girls who go to the assignation churches to 
 consecrate their hearts, not to God, but to the passion of 
 illicit love." 
 
 Here is the real intolerance in this matter. The pre- 
 vailing notion seems to be that true toleration requires 
 Protestants to shut up their mouths and their presses 
 against Catholics, but that the Catholics may say any 
 thing they please against Protestants ! Religious tolerance 
 or intolerance has no more just connection with the de- 
 struction of the Catholic school at Mount Benedict, than 
 it had with the riots last summer against anti-slavery 
 societies in New York. Orthodox churches were destroy- 
 ed by lawless mobs in those outrages, because anti- 
 slavery lectures had been delivered in them; but who cried 
 out religious intolerance then? Who thought that " the 
 
INTRODUCTION. 45 
 
 moving cause of such violence was deep-seated repug- 
 nance to the" Orthodox " faith and form of worship f" 
 And yet this might have been assigned as the cause of 
 those riots, with the same propriety a majority of a com- 
 mittee in the Massachusetts Legislature have recently 
 declared that the moving cause of the destruction of the 
 Ursuline Convent was " that deep-seated repugnance to 
 the Catholic faith and form of worship, which exists in 
 almost every Protestant community." That highly in- 
 telligent committee go farther, ana really deprecate the 
 existence of " otrong prejudices against the peculiarities 
 of that faith." "Prejudice?" Is our opposition to the 
 " peculiarities" of Romish indulgences and auricular con- 
 fessions a prejudice ? Is our " repugnance" to the establish- 
 ment in this country of the monastic institutions which 
 Luther put down three hundred years ago, and which even 
 Spain and other Catholic countries are beginning to abo- 
 lish, a " prejudice 7" If this be intolerance, then it would 
 be intolerant to oppose in any form the " peculiarities" of 
 the Inquisition, should it finally, after being driven out of 
 Europe, take refuge in Massachusetts. 
 
 This cry of intolerance against ourselves, because a 
 villainous mob have burnt down a Catholic school-house, 
 is unjust to our own character and institutions, and ought 
 to be arrested before it becomes stamped forever by the 
 seal of history. The Propaganda of Rome, and the 
 founders of the Leopold fund in Austria, to convert heretics 
 in America, could not have found better missionaries for 
 their purpose, than the scoundrels who burnt the Convent. 
 Our own public acts and documents are at this moment 
 quoted most effectually in the great West, by the Catholics, 
 to excite sympathy for their religion, by representing it as 
 terribly persecuted in this land of professed tolerance. It 
 was the mistaken impulse of popular indignation, fomented 
 by the elopement and mysterious return to the Convent of 
 Miss Harrison, and by the indiscreet threats of the Su- 
 perior to the selectmen of Charlestown, that " the Bishop 
 has twenty thousand of the vilest Irishmen at his com 
 mand, and there will be a retaliation ; you will have your 
 houses torn dcncn over your heads, and you may read your 
 riot act till your throats are sore, and you'll not quell 
 them."* — It was these " facts that contributed to the ex- 
 
 * Mr. Attorney-General Austin, in his eloquent argument against 
 
46 I N T K D V C X I N . 
 
 citeincnt which preceded the outrage, and led to its com- 
 mission," and not, as we have permitted ourselves to be 
 made to believe by the Catholics themselves, "a spirit of 
 intolerance fatal to the genius of our institutions. "t 
 
 What then is our duty as Christians and good citizens ? 
 To tell the truth, or to keep back the truth, for fear that 
 " offences must eome ?" Are wc not bound to bring this 
 question back to its true position, as an outrage upon pri- 
 vate property and personal right, an invasion of domestic 
 security and the immunity of habitation, and an offence 
 against public justice and public decency? Let us treat 
 it as a civUj and not as a religious question, condemning it 
 as strongly as if it were the destruction of a Protestant 
 school- house by a lawless rriob ; laid thus justly relieve 
 ourselves of the mountain of odium we have been laboring 
 to heap upon our institutions, as if there really had been a 
 terrible " spirit of religious intolerance" toward the Roman 
 Catholic worship " unexpectedly developed among us." 
 
 It does not follow that we. must approve of the institu- 
 tion at Mount Benedict, because we abhor the act by which 
 it was destroyed. We need not turn Catholics in order to 
 prove that we are not intolerant Protestants. We are not 
 obliged to unite with Romanists, in proclaiming our own 
 religious intolerance, in order to show that we sympathize 
 
 Buzzel), says, in relation to this fact sworn to by Mr. Edward Cut- 
 ter : — '• She (the Superior) is accused of having lold Mr. Cutter 
 that 'the Bishop had twenty thousand of the vilest Irishmen under 
 his control,' and she acknowledges (much as such an acknowledg- 
 ment might be supposed to operate against her) that 6he said so, or 
 something to that effect. " 
 
 t The origin of the mob has been ascribed, by the Superior her- 
 self, to the right cause. That lady, when under oath, testified, 
 that while the Convent was in flames, " she told Mr. E. CtitUr 
 that it all originated from Miss Harrison going to his house.' 4 
 Judge Fay also testified, that he left his daughter in the Convent, 
 and went home leaving a mob at the gate of the Convent, the night 
 of the riot, satisfied that no violence would be attempted, because, 
 knowing no cause for any other excitement but Miss Harrison 
 leaving the Convent, and believing this was all explained, he did 
 not feel alarmed. It did not occur to him that there was any other 
 cause to produce such a result, (the riot.) And yet, Jive months 
 after, Judge Fay discovers and publishes the discovery, that Miss 
 R. was the whole cause of the mob, because she had said to his 
 wife nearly two years ago, that she hoped to be an instrument of 
 showing the truth ! 
 
INTRODUCTION. 47 
 
 with them for their loss of property by violence. We are 
 not called upon to shut the door against all secessions from 
 Catholic Nunneries, by lending our help to carry into effect, 
 against a Protestant daughter of one of our own citizens, 
 the dogma of " mother church," that whenever a Catho- 
 lic changes his religion, his motives and conduct are to be 
 invariably suspected, and his honesty' never trusted.''' 
 
 No. We are bound to put forth all the vigilance and 
 majesty of the laws to detect, and punish and redress this 
 outrage upon the peace and dignity of the commonwealth ; 
 but we are not bound to deplore our " repugnance" to the 
 Catholic religion as a disreputable "prejudice," and least 
 of all are we called on to pronounce panegyrics upon 
 Nunneries and Catholic seminaries, in order to indemnify 
 the sufferers by inducing more Protestant Christians to 
 neglect our own schools, and send their daughters to be 
 educated in a Convent. 
 
 It is a question affecting education, and not affecting re- 
 ligious toleration ; and it is time to correct the error that 
 there is no distinction in matters of religious concernment 
 between a Catholic Monastery and a Catholic Church; 
 between a seminary for educating Protestant girls by 
 Catholic teachers, and a purely religious Community of 
 Catholics, exercising their forms of devotion without dis- 
 turbing the public peace, or obstructing others in their re- 
 ligious worship. Nehner should it be forgotten that the 
 constitution, which declares that " all religious sects and 
 denominations shall be equally under the protection of 
 the law," also declares, that to be entitled to such protec- 
 tion, they must " demean themselves peaceably and as 
 good citizens of the commonwealth." 
 
 In one word,' and as a full justification of the present 
 publication of these Suggestions and the accompanying 
 Narrative ; we ask, if females who are hereafter to become 
 models of fashion in our most refined circles of society, 
 and the future mothers of American citizens, are to be 
 educated in Catholic Convents, is it not a matter of vital 
 importance, that the interior discipline of such institutions 
 should be fully made known ? Our maxim is, " Rrove all 
 things, and hold fast that which is good." 
 
 NOTE.— The Boston Committee claim an exemption for Ursu- 
 line Convents from the " popular odium" yrhich they admit is just 
 against other Cloisters, on the ground that the former are devoted 
 
48 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 to education and works of charity. They can have read history 
 to little purpose, if they do not know that the great argument in 
 favor of all Monasteries, three hundred years ago, and since, was 
 and ever has been, that they were seats of learning and hospitals 
 of charity. Take the following from Kecs' Cyclopaedia. 
 
 " Although none in this enlightened period can approve either 
 the original establishment or continued subsistence of Monasteries, 
 yet the destruction of them was felt and lamented, for a conside- 
 rable time, as a great evil. One inconvenience that attended their 
 dissolution was the loss of many valuable books, for during the 
 dark ages religious houses were the repositories of literature and 
 science. Besides, they were schools of education and learning, 
 for every Convent had one person or more appointed for this pur- 
 pose, and all the neighbors that desired it might have their 
 children taught grammar and church music there, icithout any 
 expense. In the Nunneries, also, young females were taught to 
 work and read, and not only people of the lower ranks, but most 
 of the noblemen's and gentlemen's daughters icere instructed in 
 those places. All the Monasteries were also, In effect, great hos- 
 pitals, and were most of them obliged to relieve many poor people 
 every day. They were likewise houses of entertainment for all 
 travellers. And the nobility and gentry not only provided for 
 their old servants in these houses, but for their younger children 
 and impoverished friends, by making them first monks and nuns, 
 and in time priors and prioresses, abbots and abbesses." 
 
 It follows, therefore, that if the argument of the Boston Commit- 
 tee, in favor of establishing Ursuline Convents, is a good one, it is 
 iust as good for re-establishing the whole monastic system which 
 the Reformation abolished, three hundred years ago. In fact it 
 would seem as if the admirers of Catholic Cloisters in this country, 
 really meant to set about seriously reforming back the Reforma- 
 tion I 
 
SIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT. 
 
 In the summer of 1S26, while passing 
 the Nunnery on Mount Benedict, Charles- 
 town, Mass., in company with my school- 
 mates, the question was asked by a young 
 lady, who I think was a Roman Catholic, 
 how we should like to become Nuns. I 
 replied, (after hearing her explanation of 
 their motives for retirement, (fee.) "I 
 should like it well," and gave as my prin- 
 cipal reasons, their apparent holy life, my 
 lave of seclusion, &c. The conversation 
 which passed at that time made but little 
 impression upon my mind. But soon af- 
 ter, the " Religieuse"* came from Boston 
 
 * By the terra " Religieuse w I mean those who constituted the 
 Ursuline Community. 
 
 3 
 
50 SIXMONTHS 
 
 to take possession of Mount Benedict as 
 their new situation. We were in school, 
 but had permission to look at them as 
 they passed. One of the scholars re- 
 marked, that they were Roman Catho- 
 lics, and that our parents disapproved of 
 their teuets. The young lady who before 
 asked the question, how we should like 
 to become Nuns, and whose name I have 
 forgotten, was affected even to tears in 
 consequence of what passed, and begged 
 them to desist, saying, " they were saints: 
 God's people; and the chosen few;" that 
 " they secluded themselves that they 
 might follow the Scriptures more perfect- 
 ly, pray for the conversion of sinners, 
 and instruct the ignorant* in the princi- 
 ples of religion." This conversation, 
 with the solemn appearance of the Nuns, 
 affected me very sensibly, owing pro- 
 bably to the peculiar state of my feel- 
 ings. The impressions thus made re-. 
 
 • By the werd ignorant is meant what they term heretics. 
 
IN A C ON VENT. 51 
 
 mained on my mind several months; 
 and at the age of thirteen years and four 
 months I asked my parents if they were 
 willing I should become an inmate of the 
 convent. This proposition my parents 
 were inclined to treat as visionary ; but 
 they soon discovered themselves to be in 
 an error. Nothing of consequence was 
 said upon the subject; but soon after, 
 owing to the delicacy of my health, and 
 other reasons, it was deemed expedient for 
 me to visit my friends in New Hampshire, 
 and being fond of retirement, this arrange- 
 ment accorded very well with my feelings. 
 
 While in New Hampshire I spent ma- 
 ny pleasant hours, which I think of with 
 delight. Memory oft brings to view and 
 faithfully delineates those hours of retire- 
 ment and happiness which I imagined I 
 should spend, were I an inhat-tant of a 
 cloister. 
 
 While writing this narrative, I often 
 lament my little knowledge of history, 
 for had I been more acquainted with it, I 
 
52 SIX MONTHS 
 
 do not think I ever should have united 
 myself to an institution of this nature. 
 But to proceed ; I never could prevail on 
 my parents to say much on this subject. 
 I kept silence, resolving in my own mind 
 to become acquainted with some one who 
 would introduce me to the Superior of the 
 Ursuline Community, but did not ask any 
 one till after the death of my mother. 
 Previous to that event, I had become ac- 
 quainted with Miss M. EL a domestic in 
 Mr. H. J. K.'s family, near my father's 
 house, in Charlestown. 
 
 After my mother's decease, while re- 
 siding with my father, my sisters being 
 absent, Miss H. came to our house and 
 begged me to keep her as a domestic a 
 little while, as she had no place. She 
 had walked a great way for the purpose 
 of seeing Mr. K., who had moved away. 
 This was in the fall of ]S30. After con- 
 sulting with my father, I concluded to let 
 her stay. She found me in great trouble 
 and grief, in consequence of the absence 
 
1NAC0NVENT. 53 
 
 of my two younger sisters, whom I very 
 dearly loved, and who had gone to reside 
 with my sisters in Boston. After family 
 prayers were over, and I about retiring, 
 I stepped from my room to see if Miss H. 
 had extinguished her lamp, when, to my 
 surprise, I found her kneeling and hold- 
 ing a string of beads. I asked her what 
 she was doing. She did not speak for 
 some time. When she did, she said she 
 was saying her "Hail Marys."* I asked 
 her what the " Hail Marys" were, at the 
 same time taking hold of the beads. She 
 then said, " I say my prayers on these to 
 the Blessed Virgin." My friends will of 
 course excuse my curiosity at this time, 
 for I had never before learned their man- 
 ner of praying to saints and angels. Be- 
 fore I left her, she showed me an Ag- 
 
 * Catholic Prayer, (translated from the Latin.')— "Hail, 
 Mary ! full of grace ; our Lord ia with thee ! Blessed art thou 
 among women, and blessed ia the fruit of thy womb, Jesus ! 
 Holy Mary, mother of God, pray for us, sinners, now and at the 
 hour of our death. Amen. ' ' 
 
54 SIX MONTHS 
 
 nus Dei* which she wore to preserve 
 herself from the temptations of Satan. I 
 cannot remember all the conversation 
 which passed the next day on the sub- 
 ject, but I learned that she had been ac- 
 quainted with the Nuns in Boston, and 
 was also acquainted with the Superior. 
 
 The first pleasant day, I asked her to 
 accompany me to the Superior, which she 
 did, and appeared by her questions to 
 know my motive. She introduced me to 
 the Superior in the following manner. 
 We were invited by a Lay Sisterf to sit, 
 who, after retiring, in a few moments 
 made her appearance, requesting Miss H. 
 to see her in another room. Soon after, 
 the Superior came in and embraced me 
 with much seeming affection, and put the 
 following questions to me : — how long 
 since the death of my mother ; whether I 
 ever attended the Catholic church, or 
 
 • Lamb of God ;— a small piece of wax sewed up in silk in the 
 form of a heart, 
 t Those Nuns who are occupied in domestic affairs. 
 
IN A CONVENT. 
 
 knew any thing of the principles of their 
 religion ; what I had heard respecting 
 them; of their order; my views of it; 
 what progress I had made in my studies ; 
 whether I had attended much to history ; 
 knew any thing of embroidery, draw- 
 ing, or painting, or any other ornamental 
 work; whether I had ever assisted in 
 domestic affairs. After which questions, 
 taking my hand, she said, " O, it feels 
 more like a pancake than any thing 
 else."^ She inquired in what capacity I 
 desired to enter the institution, whether 
 as a Recluse or a scholar ; whether I had 
 done attending school, &c. I replied that 
 I did not consider my education complete ; 
 that I wished to go into the school at- 
 tached to the Nunnery on the same terms 
 as other pupils, until I had made suffi- 
 
 • This may appear laughable, but as I intend to publish all 
 which will be for the benefit of the reader, I cannot refrain from 
 mentioning this, in order to show the course of flattery, &c. made 
 use of by the Superior and those connected with the establishment, 
 to draw the inexperienced into their power, and make them con- 
 verts to the religion of the Pope. 
 
56 SIX MONTHS 
 
 cient progress to take the veil and become 
 a Recluse ; that my father was averse to 
 my becoming a Nwi, but I was of opinion 
 that he would concur with my Episcopal 
 friends, in uot objecting to my becoming 
 a pupil. In the course of the interview, 
 the Superior conversed much upon the 
 Scriptures, and intimated that I ought to 
 make any sacrifice, if necessary, to adopt 
 the religion of the cross; repeating the 
 words of our Saviour, " He that loveth 
 father or mother more than me, is not 
 worthy of me," &c. 
 
 At a subsequent interview the Superior 
 desired me to see the Bishop, or clergy, 
 remarking, she believed I had a vocation 
 for a religious life, and the Bishop would 
 tell me whether I had or not. She also 
 asked if I was acquainted with a Catho- 
 lic friend who would introduce me to the 
 Bishop, and mentioned a Mr. R., who 
 would introduce me to him. I was un- 
 acquainted with Mr. R., but had seen 
 him at my sister's house in Boston. She 
 
IN A CONVENT. 57 
 
 said that the Bishop or Mr. R. would 
 also discuss the matter with my father, 
 and reconcile him to Catholicity. After 
 consulting some friends who were in fa- 
 vor of the Catholic religion, I consented 
 to see Mr. R. ; who, being requested, 
 called at my father's, gave me some 
 scripture proofs of the infallibility of the 
 Romish Church; as, "Thou art Peter, 
 and upon this Rock I build my church, 
 and the gates of hell shall not prevail 
 against it;" and "whose sins ye retain 
 they are retained, and whose sins ye re- 
 mit they are remitted." " He that will 
 not hear the church, let him be to thee as 
 an heathen man and a publican." He 
 (Mr. R.) desired I would secrete the pa- 
 per upon which the texts were quoted. 
 He then took his leave, saying he would 
 call to see me in town soon at the Misses 
 S., when he would introduce me to the 
 Bishop. 
 
 1 will here remark, that previous to my 
 joining the Community, I heard of many 
 
58 SIX MONTHS 
 
 miracles wrought by Catholic Priests. 
 Mrs. G. brought a lady one day in a 
 chaise to show me her eyes, which were 
 restored by means of a Priest, Dr. O'F. 
 She, as Mrs. G. stated, was totally blind, 
 but having faith in miracles, she knelt to 
 her confessor, requesting him to heal her. 
 After touching her eyes with spittle and 
 holy oil, she immediately "received her 
 sight." 
 
 Before the next interview with the Su- 
 perior, I visited my Protestant friends, the 
 Misses S.j when Mr. R. called and pro- 
 posed to introduce me to the Bishop. He 
 accordingly accompanied me to the Bish- 
 op's, and introduced me as the young 
 lady who wished to become acquainted 
 with the tenets of the Church, and recom- 
 mended to him by the Honored Mother the 
 Superior, with directions for his ascertain- 
 ing my vocation as a fit subject for a Re- 
 cluse. The Bishop asked me if I knew the 
 meaning of the word " Nun ;" how long I 
 had thought of becoming a Nun ; my opi- 
 
IN A CONVENT. 59 
 
 nion, and the opinion of my friends, in re- 
 gard to Catholicity. And as my feelings 
 were easily wrought upon, more particu- 
 larly at this time, questions were put to 
 me, which more mature deliberation leads 
 me to think were put under the impres- 
 sion that I was very ignorant, and which 
 were very unpleasant for me to answer. 
 He even went so far as to judge my se- 
 cret thoughts, saying he knew what was 
 then passing in my mind. I then took 
 my leave, undecided what course to pur- 
 sue, and very little edified by the conver- 
 sation of the Rt. Rev. Bishop. The Bish- 
 op gave directions to Mr. R. to pur- 
 chase a Catechism of the Catholic Church 
 in the diocese of Boston, (published with 
 the approbation of the Rt. Rev. Bishop 
 Fenwick,) which I refused to accept. 
 
 About a week afterwards I called upon 
 the Superior, and made her acquainted 
 with my conversation with the Bishop; 
 likewise with my refusal of the Cate- 
 chism. On learning that my desire was 
 
60 SIX MONTHS 
 
 still strong to become an inmate of the 
 Convent, she smilingly said, that for one 
 so young as I was, to wish to seclude 
 myself from the world and live the life 
 of a Religieiise, was impossible. I re- 
 marked I did not like the Bishop so well 
 as I expected. She exclaimed, "O! he 
 is one of the servants of God ; he did so 
 to try your vocation;" and said that I 
 should like him the better the next time 
 I saw him.* After recommending me to 
 pray for grace, she caused me to kneel 
 and receive her blessing ; after which she 
 embraced me, and I returned to my fa- 
 ther's house. I shortly after visited the 
 Misses H. in Charlestown, and was intro- 
 duced to Mrs. G., who was acquainted 
 with the tenets of the Catholic Church, 
 and also with Mr. B., the Catholic Priest. 
 After a short acquaintance with her I 
 
 • I did like him the next time that I called upon him, for he 
 conversed in the most solemn manner, and after learning my 
 name, said, "Is it possible that you have a saint's name !" and 
 gave me St. Teresa, as my namesake, a beautiful wax figure, ha- 
 bited as an Ursuline Nun. 
 
INACONVENT. 61 
 
 was requested to converse with Mr. B. 
 the Priest, which I did, and liked him 
 very much. He also supplied me with 
 books, from which I learned that I ought 
 to venerate and receive the religion of the 
 Catholic Church as the only one and true 
 religion. 
 
 On Good Friday evening, I heard the 
 most affecting Catholic sermon,^ in 
 Charlestown, I ever listened to, upon the 
 Passion of our divine Redeemer. I soon 
 after visited at Mrs. G.'s, where I saw a 
 fine drawing, exhibiting the peaceful and 
 flourishing condition of the Holy and 
 Apostolic Church, until the time of the 
 Reformation under Martin Luther. Mrs. 
 G. recounted the sufferings of the Catho- 
 lic Church in consequence of this "pre- 
 tended" reformation. My friends will 
 understand, that by this time I had be- 
 come a constant visiter at the Convent. 
 On being sent for at one time by the Su- 
 perior, I met the Bishop at the Convent, 
 
 • I had before attended the lectures in Boston, at the time of 
 the controversy between Dr. BeechaT and the Catholics. 
 
62 SIX MONTHS 
 
 who was playing with the dogs ; at the 
 same time the Superior hastily approach- 
 ing, embraced me in the most affection- 
 ate manner ; as she did ever afterwards 
 when I visited her at the Convent. 
 She introduced me to the Bishop again, 
 who did not appear to recognise me, and 
 said that I was sister to the lady who 
 visited him m Boston. At this time I 
 thought the Superior and Bishop the 
 most angelic persons living, and in one 
 instance gave way to anger in conse- 
 quence of hearing a few words spoken 
 against them. On being told that my 
 mind remained still the same, the Bishop 
 remarked, "I will pray for you," and re- 
 commended to me the advantage of con- 
 tinuing under the instruction of the Priest, 
 and said he should like to see my father 
 or sister. 
 
 After the interview with the Bishop, I 
 returned to my father's, who was much 
 displeased with the steps I had taken, 
 and bade me renounce all connection with 
 
INACONVENT. 63 
 
 the Catholics, or leave my friends. (This 
 he said in a moment of excitement.) 
 But, being so much attracted by the ap- 
 parent holiness of the inmates of the 
 Convent, and viewing this as the only 
 true Church, I wished to become a mem- 
 ber of it. 
 
 Perhaps it will be proper to state some 
 of Mrs. G.'s conversation. After hearing 
 from her a pleasing account of the life of 
 a Nun. &c., I mentioned I should like to 
 become one, and would, if I could pre- 
 vail on my father and friends to consent ; 
 but unless I could, I must despair, as 
 they would not be willing to advance the 
 money which would be needed to go 
 there. She replied, " It is not money that 
 will ever induce them to take you; it 
 must all be the work of God." She 
 asked me what my Church friends* said 
 upon the subject. On my telling her that 
 they were reconciled to my entering the 
 
 * My friends of the Episcopal Church thought I could have 
 the privilege of writing when I dasired to see them. 
 
64 SIX MONTHS 
 
 institution, particularly as a scholar ; that 
 they liked the seclusion of the Convent, 
 &c. Mrs. G. stated she could see not the 
 least objection to my following my own 
 inclination. I then took my leave, 
 promising to see her at my friend Mrs. 
 H.'s. The next time I saw her, she ad- 
 vised me to leave my father's house and 
 all, for the sake of Christ. She said she 
 would procure me ornamental work, 
 which would support me, independent of 
 my relatives, &c., which she did. I 
 thanked her most heartily, and told her 
 I thought I should be happy, if I were 
 certain of going to a Cloister. She gave 
 me her word that I should. I then took 
 up with her advice and left my friends, 
 I thought for life, as I had no doubt but 
 that I should soon enter the Convent, re- 
 solving to leave all for the love of God, 
 and to consecrate the remainder of my 
 days to his service. I believed Mrs. G. 
 to be my sincere friend, and an Episcopa- 
 lian, as she had always told mc she was, 
 and placed myself under her protection. 
 
INACONVENT. 65 
 
 After visiting some Protestant friends, I 
 found means to procure my clothing, &c., 
 and went immediately to reside opposite 
 the Catholic church. I employed myself 
 while there in doing ornamental work for 
 my Catholic friends, and also in working 
 lace for the Bishop, the altar, &c. About 
 this time I was offered compensation, 
 but refused it, and received a present of 
 ten dollars, a crucifix, a pearl cross, and 
 two hooks, with my name stamped upoa 
 them in gold letters, which presents I re- 
 ceived as tokens of kindness and friend- 
 ship.* And wishing to deny myself of 
 any thing worldly, I gave up what jew- 
 elry I had, telling them I knew of no 
 greater sacrifice I could at that time make, 
 than to give up all the treasures my dear 
 mother left me. I also gave my globe 
 
 • I wish to have it understood, that the lettering on these books 
 was my new name, " Mary Agnes Teresa." My baptismal name, 
 it will be recollected, is Rebecca Theresa. The books were 
 given me by Mrs. G., who said they were from the Bishop; and 
 he afterwards, in the Convent, confirmed the statement, saying, ha 
 knew at that time of my vocation, and for that reason ??^i ZA a 
 religious name, which was a Saint's name. 
 
 3* 
 
66 SIX MONTHS 
 
 and goldfish, which were a present to 
 me. At that time I thought I was holy, 
 and could hardly speak to a Protestant. 
 I had read many Catholic hooks. My 
 time was wholly employed in working for 
 the Catholics, except my hours for medi- 
 tation and prayers. 
 
 The ordinance of baptism* was ad- 
 ministered to me by Mr. B., himself and 
 a Mrs. P. standing sponsors for me ; my 
 former baptism being considered by the 
 Catholics invalid. While in Charlestown, 
 I stood sponsor for Mrs. G.'s daughter, of 
 whom I shall speak in the course of this 
 narrative. I would here remark, had I 
 taken up with the advice given me by 
 many of my friends, I should not now 
 have the unpleasant duty of relating these 
 facts ; but so it was ; I had imbibed a re- 
 lish for what I supposed to be " real 
 pleasures," but which, alas ! I have found, 
 
 • At the time of my baptism, I was anointed with oil ; a piece 
 of salt was put in my mouth, the Priest breathing three times upon 
 me, and touching my eyes, ears, and nose with spittle, speaking 
 Latin all the while. They profess to take these ceremonies from 
 
IN A CONVENT. 67 
 
 by sad experience, to be like the " waters 
 of Marali." At an interview with the 
 Superior, I was introduced to two of the 
 " chosen Religieuse," the mother assis- 
 tant and Mrs. Mary Benedict. The first 
 question asked, was what word I brought 
 from my friends. On my hesitating to 
 give an answer, she insisted upon knowing 
 what they said ; on which I told her all 
 they had said, word for word, as nearly 
 as I could recollect ; also the advice I re- 
 ceived from a Mr. E., which appeared to 
 displease her much; and although she 
 strove to suppress her feelings, it was evi- 
 dent she was much displeased. 
 
 After some questions respecting Mr. E., 
 the Superior remarked, he was none other 
 than the man who made children's books. 
 She also questioned me with regard to a 
 conversation which took place between 
 my brother and myself on Charlestown 
 bridge, (which was published in the 
 " Jesuit,"^ highly exaggerated,) and ap- 
 
 • I afterwards asked Priest B. to explain wfeat it meant ; be 
 
68 SIX MONTHS 
 
 peared greatly pleased with the language 
 of my brother, saying, with peculiar em- 
 phasis, " O, you will die a martyr to the 
 cause of truth, should you die under per- 
 secution." I took my leave of her, pro- 
 mising to call again when she should de- 
 sire. 
 
 After this, she wrote a letter to my 
 father, of the contents of which I was 
 then ignorant, but have since learned it 
 contained offers of two or three quarters' 
 schooling, free of expense. My father 
 says he treated it with contempt ; and his 
 answer by the bearer was briefly this : 
 " he wished me to have nothing to do 
 with that institution ; that my friends 
 would prefer my going to a Protestant 
 seminary." At my next interview with 
 the Superior, she however told me, my 
 father had become reconciled to my re- 
 maining with them two or three quar- 
 ters ; after which time, he would inform 
 
 said Dr. O f F. made a mistake In writing it for the press ; and 
 corrected. For the paragraph from ihe 
 
INACONVENT. 69 
 
 them whether he could consent to have 
 me stay there longer, as a teacher of mu- 
 sic* She previously presented me with 
 some slate pongee, which was the uni- 
 form dress worn Ly the scholars in the 
 public apartments ; telling me at the same 
 time to prepare myself and have my 
 things ready by such a day. She asked 
 me, if I should come without the consent 
 of my Boston friends, if I supposed they 
 would insert any thing in the public pa- 
 pers, or make any disturbance, or come 
 there for me? to which I replied, I thought 
 not. After preparing myself for a public 
 reception, I visited the Superior, when 
 she said, if I would place myself under 
 her care from this time, she would pro- 
 tect me forever ; and particularly from the 
 persecution of the "heterodox;" and she 
 
 • I attended music, because the Superior desired it ; and she as- 
 sured me there was no need of assistance from my friends, even 
 if my father had consented, for I could with my needle be of suf- 
 ficient use to the Community to support myself without their 
 assistance. She also told me I should study when I chose, and 
 might have the privilege of coming into the Religieuse Community 
 to recite to her. 
 
70 SIX MONTHS 
 
 looked to heaven above for her reward.* 
 She then stated that the Bishop had con- 
 cluded to receive me, not as a member of 
 the public department, but asa" Novi- 
 tiate," which would screen me from the 
 questions of the Protestant scholars. She 
 also added, that I should be received as 
 the other Sisters were, and that we were 
 to support ourselves by our talents and 
 industry. The names of the Sisters were, 
 Mrs. Mary Ursula,! Miss Mary Magda- 
 
 • I wish it to be understood, that, being influenced by the Superior 
 and Mrs. G.'s advice, after hearing Romish preaching and 
 reading their books, I went to board at Mrs. H.'s, opposite the 
 Catholic church, where I employed my time in ornamental work ; 
 visited the Convent often, and informed myself as much as possi- 
 ble of a Recluse's life ; lived as retired as the " Charity Sisters," 
 except visiting some of. my relatives three times, twice accompa- 
 nied with Romish friends. 
 
 t Mrs. Mary Ursula came from New-Hampshire, and was re- 
 ceived as Choir Religieuse. She was the eldest in the Commu- 
 nity; this I learned from the Superior, who often reprimanded 
 her for saying many words in an uncouth, rustic manner, (such 
 as daoun for down, &c.) telling her of her ignorance, &c. She 
 never refused complying w*th the rules, but when reprimanded, 
 would kneel at once, and kiss the floor. I often wished to ask if 
 she was happy, but dared not speak (without permission) to her. 
 Their proceedings appeared so strange, that I was in continual 
 fear. The Novices frequently trembled when approaching " tho 
 mother," particularly at confession. 
 
IN A CONVENT. 71 
 
 lene, Miss Mary Joseph, and Miss Mary- 
 Austin. The latter was both teacher and 
 pupil. - I answered that I should like those 
 conditions best. She then desired me to 
 kneel down and take the following obli- 
 gation : "I do, with the grace and assis- 
 tance of Almighty God, renounce the 
 world for ever, and place myself under 
 your protection, from this day to conse- 
 crate myself to his honor and glory, in the 
 house of God, and to do whatever obedi- 
 ence prescribes, and tell no one of this 
 obligation but Mr. B., in confession.'' ' 
 After this, the Superior summoned two of 
 the " Choir Religieuse," who conducted 
 me to the garden, where they left me to 
 amuse myself. Presently the Superior 
 joined me, wishing to know how I liked 
 the garden, the flowers, &c. Observing a 
 pocket album in my hand, she asked 
 what I had hoarded up there; some 
 worldly goods 1 She took it, and examin- 
 ing it, desired to know if I wished to 
 keep some money I had in it, (fifteen dol- 
 
72 S I X M O N T H S 
 
 lars.) I replied no ; as I was going to join 
 them, I would intrust it to her care. She 
 also requested me to sing one tune ; I com- 
 plied, and sung u There's nothing true but 
 Heaven." Her observation was, she 
 should wish me to commence immediately 
 with music. I then left the Convent, and 
 attended the sacraments of confession and 
 communion ; and on Sabbath morning, 
 August 7th, 1831, 1 was attended to the 
 gate of the Convent by my friend, Mrs. 
 G. I was shown into the public parlor 
 by the Lay Sister, and was requested to 
 kneel and continue my devotion, until the 
 Superior made her appearance. She soon 
 came, and made a sign for me to follow 
 her. She led the way into a long room, 
 darkened, at one end of which stood a 
 large crucifix, made of bone, which I was 
 afterwards informed was made of the 
 bones of saints. The Superior told me, 
 m a whisper, it was the time of silence. 
 But after arranging my dress, she took 
 from her toilet a religious garb, which 
 
IH A CONVENT. 73 
 
 she placed upon my head, and bade me 
 kiss it, saying it had been blessed by the 
 Bishop. She then pronounced a short Latin 
 prayer, while I was kneeling, at the same 
 time giving me her blessing. After this, 
 she conducted me into another apartment, 
 where was a stranger, whom she called a 
 Postulant ; # and giving me permission to 
 speak, she left the room. A Lay Sister 
 then entered the room with refreshment, 
 after partaking which, we had permission 
 to walk in one particular path in the 
 garden. This stranger picked up a pear, 
 and began to eat it, and invited me to do 
 the same; which I declined, being ac- 
 quainted with the rules of the Convent, 
 which are very strict, as will be learned 
 in the course of the narrative. She did 
 not regard the rules so strictly as the Su- 
 perior required, who, being made ac- 
 quainted with her conversation by sepa- 
 rately questioning us, sent her away, as 
 
 Candidate for a Recluse. 
 
74 SIX MONTHS 
 
 she said, to another order ;* but I now 
 know that this was not the case. 
 
 To return to our walk in the garden ; 
 the bell rang, when we were immediately 
 conducted to the Religieuse Choir; and 
 here the Superior caused me to kneel three 
 times, before I could suit her. After the 
 performances were over, which consisted 
 of the office of adoration to the Blessed 
 Virgin and prayers to the Saints, repeated 
 in the Latin tongue, of which 1 knew 
 nothing, we proceeded to the refectory, 
 where we partook of our " portions." 
 After saying Latin, we kneeled and kissed 
 the floor, at a signal given by the Supe- 
 rior on her snuffbox. Before eating, one 
 of the Religieuse said, " In nomine domini 
 nostri Jesu Christe,"f all making the sign 
 
 ♦ I believed she had gone to another order, and after returning 
 to my sisters, told the«m so, (together with my pastor,) that she 
 was with the Sisters of Charity ; when, to my surprise, she called 
 upon me, said she had never thought of going to another or.^er, 
 and that the Superior had not done by her as she agreed. 
 
 t In the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. When opportunity 
 offered, I asked the Superior to explain the meaniag She said, in 
 
IN A CONVENT. 75 
 
 of the cross, and responding, "Amen.' 3 
 After receiving our portions, we performed 
 several devotions, such as kissing the floor 
 and repeating Latin, while the " Ange- 
 lus " was ringing. We then went imme- 
 diately to the "community." On enter- 
 ing this room, the "Novices" kneel and 
 repeat the " Ave Maria, "* kiss the floor, 
 and seat themselves for recreation, ac- 
 cording to the rules given hy the Superi- 
 or, entitled, " Rules by the Reverend 
 Mother." The following are the rules, 
 which were inclosed in a gilt frame and 
 suspended in the community ; and it is 
 
 a very solemn manner, " You must not, my dear Sister, give way 
 to curiosity. To you not recollect it is against the rules for a 
 Religieuse to do so?" I answered, "Yes, Mamere !" and com- 
 plied at once, (hy kissing the floor,) when she observed : "A 
 Religieuse should never have a will of her own ; as she grew in 
 perfection in the order, she would understand what these words 
 mean ; it will be revealed to you when you are deserving." She 
 taught me to believe that the "Office of the Blessed Virgin," 
 (which was in Latin, and which we all repeated, without under- 
 standing it.) was none other than that chanted in heaven by the 
 Saints, around the throne of the Almighty, and called the sweet 
 communion of "All Saints " 
 • Ha3 Mary 
 
76 SIX MONTHS 
 
 the duty of every Novice to read them, at 
 least, once a week. 
 
 1. To rise on the appearance of the 
 Superior. 
 
 2. When reprimanded, to kneel at orice 
 and kiss the floor, until the signal be 
 given to rise. 
 
 3. When speaking of the Superior, to 
 say our Mother; when speaking to her, 
 and to the professed Choir Religieuse, Ma- 
 mere; to say Sister, when speaking to the 
 Novices ; of them, Miss ; and of the pro- 
 fessed Choir, Mrs. ; to say our or ours, in- 
 stead of my or mine. 
 
 4. To say " Ave Maria" ever)' time 
 we enter the community. 
 
 5. Before entering any room, to give 
 three knocks on the door, accompanied by 
 some religious ejaculation, and wait until 
 they are answered by three from within. 
 
 6. Not to lift our eyes while walking in 
 the passage Ways; also, never to touch 
 each other's hands. 
 
INACONVENT. 77 
 
 7. To stand while spoken to by the 
 Bishop or Superior, and kneei while 
 speaking to them ; to speak in a particu- 
 lar tone. 
 
 8. If necessary to speak to the Supe- 
 rior during a time of silence, approach 
 her kneeling, and speak in whispers. 
 
 9. Never to leave a room without per- 
 mission, giving at the same time our rea- 
 sons. 
 
 10. To rise and say the "Hour"* 
 every time the clock strikes, except when 
 the Bishop is present, who, if he wishes, 
 makes the signal. 
 
 • " Th% Hqut.—O sacred heart of Jesus ! always united to the 
 will of thy Father, grant that ours may be sweetly united in thine. 
 Heart of Mary ! an asylum in the land of our captivity, procure 
 for us the happy liberty of the children of Jesus. May the souls 
 of the faithful departed, through the merits of Christ and mercies 
 of God, rest in peace. Amen." 
 
 The above is what is called an Hour ; there is a different, 
 though similar one, for each of the twenty- four hours in the day. 
 They are written and placed in two gilt frames, over the mantle- 
 piece ; twelve over the heart of Mary In one, and twelve over the 
 heart of Jesus in the other. Every time the clock strikes, the one 
 whose turn it is to lecture rises and says one of them. 
 
78 IN A CONVENT. 
 
 The following are the written "Rules 
 and Penances of our Holy Father, Saint 
 Augustine" together with those of Saint 
 Ursula, as near as I can recollect. They 
 are read at the refectory table every 
 week. 
 
 1. To kneel in the presence of the 
 Bishop, until his signal to rise. 
 
 2. Never to gratify our appetites, ex- 
 cept with his holiness the Bishop's or a 
 Father Confessor's permission. 
 
 3. Never to approach or look out of the 
 window of the Monastery. 
 
 4. To sprinkle our couches every night 
 with holy water. 
 
 5. Not to make a noise in walking over 
 the Monastery. 
 
 6. To wear sandals and haircloth ; to 
 inflict punishment upon ourselves with 
 our girdles, in imitation of a Saint. 
 
 7. To sleep on a hard mattress or couch, 
 with one coverlet. 
 
 8. To walk with pebbles in our shoes. 
 
INACONVENT. 79 
 
 or walk kneeling until a wound is pro- 
 duced. Never to touch any thing without 
 permission. 
 
 9. Never to gratify our curiosity, or ex- 
 ercise our thoughts on any subject, with- 
 out our spiritual director's knowledge 
 and advice. Never to desire food or water 
 between portions. 
 
 10. Every time, on leaving the com- 
 munity, to take holy water from the altar 
 of the Blessed Virgin, and make the sign 
 of the cross. 
 
 11. If a Religieuse persist in disobey- 
 ing the Superior, she is to be brought 
 before the Bishop of the diocese, and pun- 
 ished as he shall think proper. Never to 
 smile except at recreation, nor even then 
 contrary to religious decorum. 
 
 12. Should the honored Mother, the Su- 
 perior, detect a Religieuse whose mind is 
 occupied with worldly thoughts, or who 
 is negligent in observing the rules of the 
 Monastery, which are requisite and ne- 
 cessary to her perseverance and perfec- 
 
80 SIX MONTHS 
 
 tion in a religious life, she should imme- 
 diately cause her to retire to her cell, 
 where she could enter into a retreat. 
 
 I shall now continue my narrative of 
 the remainder of the first day. At re- 
 creation, the Postulant and I had permis- 
 sion to embrace, in a new form, the Reli- 
 gieuse. After that they congratulated me 
 on my success, saying they had ever pray- 
 ed for me since they had heard of my vo- 
 cation. The evening bell for the Latin 
 office now rang, and we assembled at the 
 choir, where we performed such ceremo- 
 nies as I before named, until time of retir- 
 ing. As we were strangers, the Superior 
 conducted us to the infirmary, where other 
 Novices were preparing to retire, and be- 
 fore leaving it, bade us not to rise until we 
 had orders. Next morning being holy day 
 morning, the bell rang at three, instead of 
 four, as it usually does, for meditation 
 in the choir. While the Angelus* was 
 
 • The Anijelus is the bell rung while repeating the three salu- 
 tations and three Hail Marys. 
 
INACONVENT. 81 
 
 ringing, at five A. M., we were called to 
 attend Complin and Prime, until half-past 
 six ; then 1 jitany to the Saints. After 
 Litany, the bell rang for diet in the re- 
 fectory, every morning, except Friday; 
 on which day we assembled for confes- 
 sion to the Superior. 
 
 The manner of confession to the Superior 
 is as follows : the room is first darkened, 
 and one lighted wax taper placed upon the 
 Superior's throne; and she is considered as 
 filling the place or station of the Blessed 
 Virgin. After taking their places in the 
 greatest order and silence, the Religieuse 
 respond. Then the lecturess reads from a 
 book, called Rules for the Ursuline Order, 
 by Saint Ursula, about complaining of the 
 cold, our clothing, food, &c. &c. They 
 sit on their feet during the reading, a 
 posture extremely painful. The reading 
 finished, the Superior whispers to the Sis- 
 ters to approach her separately, which they 
 do ; each one in her turn approaches, and 
 repeats the following : "Our Mother, we ac-* 
 
82 SIX MONTHS 
 
 knowledge that we have been guilty of 
 breaking the rules of our Holy Order, by- 
 lifting our eyes while walking in the pas- 
 sage-ways; in neglecting to take holy 
 water on entering the community and 
 choir ; failing in respect to our Superior, 
 and veneration to our Father ; failing in 
 religious decorum, and in respect to our 
 vows, — poverty and obedience ; for which 
 we most humbly ask pardon of God, 
 penance and forgiveness of you, our Holy 
 Mother." As each one finishes, the "Holy 
 Mother" gives her advice and penances, 
 and her blessing ; they then kiss her {eet, 
 and sometimes make the cross with their 
 tongues on the floor ; then making their 
 inclination, they retire to the choir to per- 
 form the penances. 
 
 After they are all assembled in the 
 choir, the Superior says, Kyrie eleison, 
 and they all answer, Kyrie eleison ; the 
 Superior says, Christe eleison, and they 
 answer, Christe eleison, &c. &c. She then 
 says Litany to the Saints in Latin, be- 
 ginning with :: Sancta Maria," and they 
 
INACONVENT. 83 
 
 respond, " Ora pro nobis," &c. &c. This 
 ceremony is very solemn. It is performed 
 until eight o'clock, A. M., when we re- 
 ceive our portion, sitting on the floor. The 
 bell rings at half-past eight for young 
 ladies' recreation. Then we attend to 
 study until a quarter before eleven ; then 
 private lecture until eleven; then bell rings 
 for the examination of conscience till a 
 quarter past eleven ; then for diet. The 
 services at diet >X: are, after repeating 
 
 * Our diet consisted of the plainest kind of food, principally 
 vegetables and vegetable soups, Indian puddings, and, very sel- 
 dom, meat. Our tea. was made of herbs, sometimes of the bitter- 
 est kind. We partook of this diet in imitation of the Holy 
 Fathers of the Desert, to mortify our appetites. Pumpkins, 
 stewed with molasses and water, served us sometimes as a dessert. 
 Occasionally we had mouldy bread to eat. A very insignificant 
 piece of butter was sometimes placed on our plates. The Supe- 
 rior's diet was far better than ours; semetimes it was sumptuous, 
 wine not excepted. I ascertained this, as 1 occasionally, in turn* 
 went round to gather the fragments. She sent me, on two occa- 
 sions, some apple parings to eat, as a part of my portion. Some- 
 times the Religieuse deny themselves any diet ; prostrate, kiss the 
 feet of those who remain at table, performing various kinds of 
 penance, while the others are eating and listening to the reading. 
 Those who have permission to deny themselves in the morning, 
 take their work-baskets as they pass to the refectory ; where thsy 
 aew by caudle-light, as the lecturesa is reading. This has a so- 
 lemn and impressive appearanee. 
 
84 SIXMONTHS 
 
 Latin : — first, they seat themselves in or- 
 der upon a bench, first crossing themselves 
 in their appointed places, on one side of a 
 long, narrow table ; before each one lies a 
 small linen napkin or servet, rolled around 
 another small cloth, containing a knife and 
 fork ; beside each servet is a plate contain- 
 ing the "portion:" then the Superior enters 
 and passes along to her table, at the 
 head of the room, the Nuns making their 
 inclinations as she passes. She then makes 
 a signal on her snuff box, and the " Reli- 
 gieuse," whose turn it is to speak, says, 
 ''• Benedicite ;" the Superior answers, " Be- 
 nedicite;" and so it continues, in a similar 
 manner, from one to the other, the " Effi- 
 cient"* repeating a Latin prayer. The Su- 
 perior then makes the signal for thelectu- 
 ress to read from the Lives of the Saints 
 and Martyrs, while the others are eating. 
 When the signal is given, each one rolls 
 up the knife and fork in the napkin, and 
 
 • The Efficient is one who repeats prayers and officiates during 
 the office and serves at Mass. 
 
INACONVENT. 85 
 
 lays it as she found it ; (they also open it 
 at a signal;) and the one whose turn it is 
 to do so, after kissing the floor, as a token 
 of humility, takes from the drawer a white 
 apron and a basket containing a napkin, 
 and after putting on the apron, brushes the 
 fragments from the tables into the basket, 
 and takes the servets, making her inclina- 
 tion to each one. She then takes the 
 articles off the Superior's table, one by 
 one in a napkin, in a solemn manner. If 
 any eatables fall on the floor, they must 
 be taken up in a napkin, and not by any 
 means with the bare hands. 
 
 After this, the Superior makes a signal, 
 and the lecturess and before- mentioned 
 Religieiise kneel in the middle of the floor 
 and kiss it, and immediately rise and join 
 the others in repeating the Latin prayers ; 
 after which the lecturess rings the An- 
 gelus. During this ringing, they all kneel 
 and repeat it, then assemble in the com- 
 munity for " recreation." During this 
 they are permitted to converse with one 
 
86 SIX MONTHS 
 
 another, but in a particular and low tone, 
 and only on such subjects as the Superior 
 shall give them ; if she be absent, the 
 conversation is usually on the subject last 
 read at the table ; and they work during 
 the time. After recreation, public* lec- 
 tures take place, and at one o'clock the 
 bell rings for " visitation" to the altar, 
 which, with the Vespers, occupy us an 
 hour and a half. Then the Rosary is said. 
 On hearing the bell again, we all assem- 
 ble in the community, where there is a 
 "point of prayer" read. Then lessons 
 occupy us until five ; meditation and re- 
 llcction half an hour longer ; then the 
 bell again rings for diet, where we go 
 through the observances before named; 
 then recreation forty-five minutes ; then 
 the miserere^ during which the bell rings ; 
 then public prayers in the choir ; then the 
 Benedictus rings, and the Lay Sistersf 
 
 • Public lecture means a subject read aloud by the lecturess. 
 
 ■f One Lay Sister remains kneeling in the entry until we get to 
 the psalm called Te Deum, when she rings while we are saying it 
 The Keligieuse bow ot knee., &<;., hue do not join ir. saying lite 
 office 
 
INACONVENT. 87 
 
 come up into the choir. Matins, lauds, 
 and prayers continue from seven until 
 nine o'clock, when we retire while the 
 bell is ringing, except those who attend 
 lessons and penances. This concludes a 
 day and its services. The same course 
 was pursued everyday except Fridays and 
 Sundays, when there was some variation. 
 I had become, in about a week, appa- 
 rently so great a favorite of the Superior, 
 that although remiss in duties, it was in 
 a measure overlooked. She would even 
 reprimand the Religieuse for my example 
 and my faults ; one instance of which T 
 will give. Failing to arrange the Superi- 
 or's toilet and seat and cricket, it being 
 my turn, one of the Religieuse was repri- 
 manded in my stead, and immediately 
 knelt and kissed the floor. After this I was 
 sent for to the Bishop's room, where the 
 young ladies assemble on Mass morning, 
 and after kneeling, &c., the Superior asked 
 me how things appeared; if they ap- 
 peared as I thought they would : if I liked 
 
00 SIX MONTHS 
 
 my food, &c. Feeling a repugnance to 
 answer her, she said, " Recollect yourself. " 
 
 1 told her I liked all pretty well, except 
 my couch. She left, telling me to beg the 
 intercession of Saint Teresa. The next 
 day my couch was exchanged for a better, 
 and the image of Saint Teresa put near 
 it, for my use. 
 
 Soon after I became an inmate of the 
 Convent, the Bishop came into the com- 
 munity, and said, " How does that little 
 Nun? And what have you done with 
 Sister Stimson ?" The Superior answered, 
 that she was not fit for the order, and she 
 had sent her on to the Sisters of Charity. 
 (See note on page 74.) He then, address- 
 ing me, asked how I liked Mount Bene- 
 dict. I said, " Very well, my Lord." He 
 then said, " O, but you will have to strive 
 with the temptations between the good 
 and evil spirits;" and he then explained 
 all the horrors of Satan ; and nsked me 
 where Saint Teresa, my namesake, was ; 
 and if T had rocio \:: "> v?A k>ll me Iq 
 
INACONVENT. 89 
 
 say, as she did, these words, " Now come, 
 all of you ; I, being a true servant of God, 
 will see what you can do against me," 
 by way of challenge to the evil ones ; and 
 beg her intercession. He told me my 
 sister had been to see if I had taken the 
 veil, or had any thought of taking it ; and 
 he said I might rest contented, as my 
 friends would trouble me no more. 5 * He 
 then told me the difference between a holy 
 life and a worldly life; said the Devil 
 would assail me, as he did Saint Teresa, 
 and make me think I ought to go back to 
 the world ; and make me offers of worldly 
 pleasures, and promise me happiness. In 
 order to prevent this, I must watch and 
 pray all the time, and banish entirely 
 worldly thoughts from my mind; and 
 throw holy water at the evil spirits, and 
 challenge them to come if they dare. 
 Perceiving the unpleasant effect this had 
 
 • I have since learned it was my sister and another lady. They 
 say he. told then* T ha.^ art taken the veil, hut hoped I soon would 
 do it 
 
 i* 
 
90 SIXMONTHS 
 
 on my feelings, he portrayed in lively 
 colors the happiness which would flow 
 from my resisting the evil spirits, and what 
 a crown of glory would be placed on my 
 head by the angels. 
 
 According to my Confessor's orders, I 
 took upon myself many austere penances, 
 &c. ; but the Superior, noticing my ex- 
 haustion from this cause, released me from 
 the austerities for a time, saying I was a 
 favored one ; and she gave me permission 
 to rest, while the others rose to say 
 midnight matins* and hear Mass. On 
 the exaltation of the holy cross, the Bishop 
 gave us his blessing, we all kneeling in 
 the community. In conversation with 
 the Sisters, he remarked one had not a 
 very pleasant countenance ; and he asked 
 me how I was pleased with my teacher, 
 saying he hoped she put a more pleasant 
 countenance on while instructing me. 
 
 * Midnight mass and midnight matins are said at night during 
 Lent, and midnight mass always on Christinas. This is a time of 
 special humiliatloi in»" (Jit**! 
 
I N A C O N V E N T . 91 
 
 Once, while walking with the Bishop 
 and Superior, we met a stranger, upon 
 which the Superior required us to turn 
 our hacks while she conversed with 
 him. After he left the garden, the Bishop 
 and Superior held some conversation to- 
 gether apart from us, of which I overheard 
 the following words of the Bishop: "I 
 fear he did not come here accidentally, as 
 he stated, hut for some particular purpose." 
 Immediately the Mother Assistant came 
 to me, saying that gentleman looked 
 very much like me, and asked me if he 
 was not my brother ; and having per- 
 mission to look, I answered, " No, he is 
 not." We then retired within the Convent. 
 The Bishop observed to me just before we 
 went in, that that gentleman looked no 
 more like me than one of the dogs of the 
 Convent. 
 
 I was particularly hurt in witnessing 
 the austerities put on a Religieuse, named 
 Sister Mary Magdalene, who came from 
 Ireland. Once, while reciting the office, 
 
92 SIX MONTHS 
 
 sue, by accident or losing breath, spoke in 
 a lower key than she should ; at a signal 
 from the Superior, she fell prostrate before 
 her desk, and remained so for one hour, 
 until the office was finished, when she 
 had permission to rise. This was the 
 first time I thought the Superior had done 
 wrong. * Soon after this, in private con- 
 fession to the Superior, she appeared de- 
 termined to know my thoughts, and put 
 many questions to me that were hard to 
 answer. I would here remark, that this 
 is the practice at auricular confessions. 
 She told me to beg the intercession of my 
 patron Saint, of the Blessed Virgin, and 
 Saint Ursula. I complained to her of 
 my strength's failing, and of my diet, not 
 being such as I was used to ; she replied, 
 that a Religieuse should have no choice, 
 and that I should have left my feelings 
 in the world ; and she immediately 
 
 • The Superior often made mistakes in repeating the office, by 
 endeavoring to repeat it without the book. And I learned after- 
 wards from Mary Francis that the Superior did not understand it 
 
INACONVENT. 93 
 
 imposed the following penances: — to 
 make the sign of the cross on the floor 
 with my tongue, and to eat a crust of 
 bread in the morning for my portion. 
 The first of these penances I did not fulfil 
 to the letter, making the sign of the cross 
 with my hand instead of my tongue. 5 * 
 
 After this a daughter of my friend Mrs. 
 G. came to the Convent, and was permitted 
 to spend some time with me in private. 
 I also had some trifles given me as 
 presents for this little girl, and leave to 
 send what word I wished to my friends. 
 This girl told me at the time, she was 
 coming there to school soon ; I therefore 
 sent by her my love to my friends, in- 
 forming them that I liked the Convent 
 very well, and should be very happy to 
 see them, if they would not speak against 
 my religion. f 
 
 • I would state to the reader, that those things were received on 
 my part with great repugnance ; but the Superior said they were 
 to prove my vocation, and I submitted without a murmur. 
 
 f This message ray friends never received, as I have since 
 learned. I was deceived in regard to the friendship of Mra. Q. 
 
94 SIXMONTHS 
 
 Soon preparations were made for my tak- 
 ing the vows of a Religieuse, a Novena 
 (nine days' devotion) being said for me, 
 and for my perfection in a religious life, and 
 prayers for the conversion of my friends. 
 About this time my sponsor, the Priest, 
 visited the Convent, and talked, as I then 
 thought, like a godlike person. My recep- 
 tion was to take place privately ', because 
 we wished to keep my father ignorant of 
 the manner in which I had been received; 
 and because he might hear of it, should ii 
 take place publicly ; as he had before said, 
 I was not eighteen, and he could prevent 
 my going there. They said he could not 
 prevent me, as I was now of age. I was 
 perfectly happy at this time, and presented 
 the Superior with some lines of poetry, 
 which gave her proof of my sincerity and 
 contentment. 
 
 She appeared very much pleased with 
 the verses, embraced me very affectionate- 
 ly, and expressed her hearty approbation 
 of my perseverance in performing the 
 
INACONVENT. 95 
 
 duties of the order, and said the request 
 for her entreaties that I might persevere in 
 a religious life should be granted, and she 
 would show the lines to the Bishop. She 
 accordingly did so, when he was present 
 one day, and he said he must write my 
 conversion, for it was so much like Saint 
 Teresa's, my namesake. After this she 
 gave orders to have all my worldly dresses, 
 being ten in number, and other articles of 
 wearing apparel, altered for those young 
 ladies whom she clothed and educated ; 
 and for me she ordered a long habit to be 
 prepared, which was to be blessed by the 
 Bishop ; also a veil, which they said de- 
 noted purity and innocence. 
 
 One time I failed in rising at the Ange- 
 lus,^ which was not noticed by the Su- 
 perior. The next morning a Religieuse 
 did not rise until the ringing of the Ange- 
 lus, and when she came into the refectory 
 
 • My time was to rise at the Angelus, which was rung at five, 
 while the Religieuse rose at four, except on holy-day mornings, 
 »>Ti«n they rose at tl.ree 
 
96 SIX MONTHS 
 
 we were at diet. She brought her pillow, 
 and kneeling, kissed it, and said as 
 follows : — " I have neglected to obey the 
 commands of the Superior, and have not 
 risen until the Angelus, which I am most 
 heartily sorry for; and I humbly ask 
 pardon of God and penances of you, our 
 Holy Mother." The Superior said no 
 one who disobeyed her commands should 
 be permitted to remain in this Monastery. 
 Her penance was to kiss the floor and re- 
 main kneeling until lecture and diet were 
 over. 
 
 The Bishop, about this time, came to 
 examine our work, &c. After hearing us 
 sing, he complimented us, said he should 
 hardly have thought that I could have 
 learned of heretics, to sing and work so 
 well ; and desired me to learn him to 
 work lace, as he feared I should not 
 finish his robe for Christmas. After being 
 presented, as usual, with wine, he retired. 
 The Bishop's wine is presented in a 
 golden cup. The Rehgpersst: »!-.•. pre- 
 
I N A CONTENT. 97 
 
 sents it remains kneeling until he has 
 drank it. 
 
 As was usual on Saturday evening, after 
 signifying our obedience to the Superior, 
 by prostrating and kissing the floor, we 
 received permission to visit the " sanctum 
 sanctormrv' on Sabbath morning, to re- 
 ceive the eucharist, all of us except my 
 teacher, (the one who the Bishop said did 
 not look pleasant, and whom I saw in 
 tears on Sunday morning.) The Superior 
 made a signal for me to follow her into 
 the Bishop's room, when, first inquiring 
 into my feelings, as she usually did, she 
 asked me what I thought of my teacher : 
 if she had put any questions to me while 
 at my lessons; and how long before I 
 thought I should be able to pronounce my 
 vows, and take charge of a class in music. 
 She asked me. at another time, what I 
 thought was the reason of my teacher's 
 crying; (her name was Miss Mary 
 Francis.) I replied I did not know. She 
 said it was the operation of the Holy 
 
98 SIX MONTHS 
 
 Spirit, and her devotional feelings wert? 
 very deep. 
 
 The next day, while we were at our 
 recreations, Miss Mary Francis appeared 
 in great distress from some cause, and in 
 tears. She soon after pencilled a few 
 lines, and approached the Superior kneel- 
 ing, &c., and presenting the paper ; she 
 appeared confused and very angry, and 
 bade her take a seat. After this the Su- 
 perior thought it necessary for me to re- 
 tire to the infirmary and take an emetic, 
 which I did the next day. The day after 
 this I had orders to take medicine, which 
 I was averse to, and on my declining, the 
 infirmarian* made the sign of the cross a 
 number of times, and told me it was the 
 Superior's orders, and I could not avoid 
 taking a part of it. I remained in the 
 infirmary two days without a fire, and 
 the weather was very cold. I had then 
 
 • The infirmarian is one who tends upon the sick. I was at 
 well w usual when I took the emetic. 
 
IN A CONVENT. 99 
 
 permission to go to the choir, where I 
 immediately fainted, at which the Supe- 
 rior was angry, and said in a whisper 
 she had told me / ought not to have any 
 feelings. 
 
 For a while Sister Mary Francis was 
 not present at the office and recreative© 
 as usual, and the Superior gave as a rea- 
 son for her absence that she was ill. But 
 it will be necessary for me to leave for a 
 moment Miss Mary Francis, and speak of 
 Miss Mary Magdalene. The latter was 
 put over me as a teacher in the room of 
 Mary Francis, whom I then supposed to 
 be sick ; but I afterwards learned that she 
 was confined, that she might have a better 
 opportunity to clear herself of the temp- 
 tations of Satan. Sister Mary Magda- 
 lene told me she was about to leave this 
 world, and wished to give me some advice. 
 She said she thought it was God's will to 
 take her to himself. After reminding me 
 of the respect due to the Superior, and of 
 my negligence in not kissing the floor i» 
 
100 SIX MONTH* 
 
 the choir, and of my looking up while 
 walking in the passages, she then spake 
 of Sister Mary Francis ; said she would 
 soon be able to give me lessons as before ; 
 but wished to know which of the Novices 
 I thought had the best vocation for a re- 
 ligious life, and which one would be most 
 likely to return to the world. To the lat- 
 ter I replied, " Sister Mary Francis." She 
 asked why. I said she did not appear to 
 observe the rules so strictly as the others. 
 She asked me if that would be any 
 inducement for me. I replied, u No, not 
 that 1 ' She appeared unable to talk, but 
 notwithstanding her weak state and 
 trembling hands, she sewed all the time. 
 I told her it gave me pain to see her 
 distress herself so. With a peculiar 
 emphasis she said, u Sister, obedience /" 
 and in a very affecting manner made the 
 sign of the cross. 
 
 While at my lessons one day, in the 
 hours of silence, the Superior and 
 Mother Assistant came, wishing me to tell 
 
IN A C O .N V BNT.. 101 
 
 them where Miss Mary Francis was. I 
 replied I had not seen her. They left the 
 room, and soon Miss Mary Francis enter- 
 ed, in tears. The Superior followed, and 
 seizing her by the arm, shook her violently, 
 threatening to punish her for disobedience, 
 and wished she had a cell austere enough 
 to put her in, and exclaimed, " Shame ! 
 shame ! you ' disedify' Miss Mary 
 Agnes."* She then told her not to feign 
 sickness .again, but to show by her appe- 
 tite her illness. After the penance of 
 kissing the floor, &c. she gave her a 
 number of prayers to copy for the Pro- 
 testant scholars. And from that time we 
 were watched with the strictest scrutiny. 
 The next day the Superior gave me per- 
 mission to write to my father. She said 
 Miss Mary Francis was crazy, and she 
 should not keep her in the Convent more 
 than a month longer, if she did not reform. 
 
 • All the Nuns hare the name of Mary, and added to it is the 
 oame of some canonized Saint, Miss Mary Agnes was my name. 
 
102 SIX MONTHS 
 
 Mary Francis' grief will be wen re- 
 collected by those in the public apart- 
 ments. The next day I wrote to my 
 father. The letter* was corrected by Miss 
 Mary Francis, who was not crazed, as 
 stated by the Superior. I then whispered 
 to her, (it being the time of silence,) and 
 asked the cause of her grief. She wrote 
 on a slate, "she could not." A Reli- 
 gieuse was in the room, watching us very 
 narrowly, and to mislead the Religieuse, 
 she reminded me of making false syntax. 
 We next met in the community for recrea- 
 tion. The Superior gave the Mother 
 Assistant permission to speak ; (Miss 
 Mary Francis was absent.) She began 
 by asking how she did. The Superior 
 answered, " She goes on in her old way ;" 
 and observed that she was unfit for the 
 order. The Mother Assistant said, "O, 
 Mamere, let me pray, at least, a month 
 longer for her;" and turning to the No- 
 
 • This letter was never received by my father, 
 
INA CONVENT. 103 
 
 vices, asked them to join with her. The 
 Superior granted her permission, but 
 handed her a letter to read. The Mother 
 Assistant, turning to us, said, " Sisters, 
 pay attention. This letter is from Miss 
 Mary Francis' aunt, Miss I., of New 
 York." The substance of it was, that 
 she had received her (the Superior's) letter, 
 and was sorry to have recommended to 
 her that person, but she thought she had 
 reformed, and would be a suitable member 
 for a Monastery ; and she begged pardon 
 for introducing one to her who had dis- 
 turbed the peace of her little Community, 
 and hoped if it were possible she would 
 not long be troubled with her, &c. The 
 Superior said, after the close of the letter, 
 "Sisters, you may still continue to pray for 
 her, and I will see about this thing, as it 
 may be a temptation of the adversary." 
 Two or three days after this, I met Miss 
 Mary Francis at my lessons in the com- 
 munity, and again asked her to tell rm 
 her distress by writing on the slate or I 
 
104 S I X M ONTHS 
 
 would tell the Superior I could not learn 
 of her. She begged I would not, and told 
 me she was under a solemn obligation not 
 to make known the cause of her grief. 
 She asked me if I was happy ; I told her 1 
 was not to see her unhappy, and again 
 entreated her to tell me the cause of her 
 rears. She said I must not tempt her to 
 break her promise, for if we were detected 
 in conversation, she would be made still 
 more unhappy. I then asked, if she had 
 recovered from her illness, why she did 
 not go to her class, &c. Shesaid the Supe- 
 rior had forbidden her, but she could not 
 answer any other questions. I had formed 
 a strong attachment for this lady, and it 
 gave me pain to see her so distressed. 
 
 At next recreation, the Superior sent 
 us word to meet the Bishop in the medi- 
 tation garden. Sister Mary Magdalene 
 being too exhausted to walk as fast as we 
 did, the Bishop asked who that was, and 
 being told, he burst into a laugh, and said, 
 " Sister Magdalene, when are you goinp 
 
IN A CONVENT. 105 
 
 to heaven'.*" She replied, in a voice 
 scarcely audible, ' ' I have no will of my 
 own, my Lord ; whenever it shall please 
 God to take me."* She thought she 
 should not live to see Christmas. We 
 then assembled in the community, and 
 when all were seated, the Bishop inquired, 
 " Where is that sober- faced Nun,'?" Being 
 told by the Mother Assistant that she was 
 giving lessons to Miss F., he took the 
 letter before spoken of, and looking it 
 over, handed it to the Mother Assistant, 
 saying, "Why do you keep her, and why 
 does she not go to her class 1" The Su- 
 perior said the young ladies were not 
 pleased with her as a teacher. He asked if 
 all disliked her. Miss Mary Benedict re- 
 plied, " No, my Lord : some in the French 
 class appear to like her;" on which he 
 said, " Show them that letter." 
 
 At my next lesson, I told Mary Francis 
 
 • It is here to be understood, that Sister Mary Magdalene was 
 in a consumption, and had entered the Uor.vett nine rronlhs be- 
 fore in perfect health. She was worn out with austerities 
 
106 SIX MONTHS 
 
 if she did not explain to me the caus>5 
 of her grief I should certainly tell the 
 Superior; for I could receive no benefit 
 from her instructions while she was so con- 
 fused, and the Superior had reprimanded 
 me for not learning my lessons; and I 
 promised if she would tell me I would 
 not inform the Superior. She replied that 
 she could not answer me then, but would 
 think of it, and give me an answer in the 
 afternoon. Accordingly, in the afternoon, 
 a Religieuse being present, watching us, 
 she communicated what I desired to 
 know by writing on a slate, * and desired 
 to know if I was happy. I answered 
 that I did not like the Superior so well 
 as formerly. She then wrote, that while 
 at prayer and meditation she concluded 
 it was her duty, particularly as I was 
 dissatisfied, to give me some advice, and 
 considered her promise before made as 
 not binding; and receiving from me a 
 
 • We were at &e piano ; she pretended to write notes, &c 
 
IN A CONVENT. 1 07 
 
 promise oi* 3ecrecy, she proceeded to say- 
 that she hoped she should be pardoned if 
 any thing wrong was said by her, as my 
 whole happiness depended on the words 
 she should communicate. " I am," says 
 she, ' ; kept here by the Superior, through 
 selfish motives, as a teacher, under a slav- 
 ish fear and against my will. I have 
 written several letters to my father, and 
 have received no satisfactory answer ; and 
 I have for a long time felt dissatisfied 
 with my situation. The Superior has fail- 
 ed in fulfillmgher promise, not complying 
 with the conditions on which I was re- 
 ceived ; which were, that as she was in 
 need of a teacher, particularly in French 
 ?nd music, 1 might take the white veil, 
 ^nd leave whenever I chose : and my 
 taking the veil, " as it was only a custom," 
 should not compel me ; and that my obli- 
 gations should not be binding. My father 
 thinks I can leave at any time, for I do 
 not believe he has received my letters, 
 and that letter you have heard read as 
 3* 
 
108 SIX MONTHS 
 
 Miss I.'s is a forged one." We were here 
 interrupted by the entrance of the Superior, 
 who made a sign for me to follow her into 
 the Bishop's room. After asking me how I 
 progressed in my lessons, and hearing me 
 read in the " Novices' Directory,"* she ob- 
 served that I looked melancholy, and com- 
 manded me to tell her the reason. I re- 
 plied that I did not feel well, that my lungs 
 were sore since taking the emetic, f &c. 
 She said that was only a notion, and bade 
 me tell the true reason without any more 
 equivocation. My words were, I did not 
 love her so well then as formerly. She ex- 
 claimed, " O, my child, I admire you for 
 
 • This is a book which is used only in Convents. It directs us to 
 respect the Bishop as a representative of the person of Christ, and 
 tin confession as Christ himself; and the Superior as fulfilling the 
 ofTco of Mother of God. 
 
 t My lungs were also very sore in consequence of repeating the 
 offices ; so much so, that when present at recreation, when I had 
 permission to speak, it gave me pain rather than pleasure. I 
 have, since leaving the Convent, consulted several physicians, who 
 have expressed it as their opinion, that the cause of my bleeding 
 at the lungs, which frequently occurs, was originally the repeating 
 the office and other services, in one long, drawling tone, which 
 any one can know by trying to be very difficult 
 
IN A CONVENT, 109 
 
 your simplicity ;" and asked me my rea- 
 son for not loving her, which I declined 
 giving. She commanded " obedience" 
 with seeming mildness, and I told her that 
 I thought she did not pay that attention 
 to me she had promised, and that she was 
 not so kind as formerly. She then said a 
 Religieuse should have no will of her 
 own ; that their Superior put many things 
 upon them, in order to try their vocation. 
 She then recounted the sufferings of a 
 certain Saint, and hid me pray to that 
 Saint for protection; and showed me a 
 phial, which she said contained some of 
 Saint Teresa's tears ; and said if I would 
 save my tears while in devotion, she 
 could tell by them whether 1 should ever 
 arrive to the perfection of a Saint. She 
 then gave me her blessing, and reminded 
 me of my reception, which was soon to 
 take place. 
 
 At my lesson in the afternoon I again 
 conversed with Mary Pr&ncis concern- 
 ing the letter, and requested her to inform 
 
110 SIX MONTHS 
 
 me how my happiness was concerned, 
 She said still that the letter read to the 
 Community was a forged one ; that Mrs. 
 ]. was her aunt and sincere friend; and 
 did her father know her sufferings, and 
 the treatment she received from the Su- 
 perior, he would prosecute her ; that she 
 feared the Superior as she did a serpent. 
 She then advised me not to bind myself, 
 after my three months' " test or trial,"* 
 to that order, by complying with the rules 
 of " reception/' any farther than would 
 leave me at liberty to go to another if 1 
 chose; and I must not think, because 
 they were wicked, that the inmates of all 
 Convents were so. I assured her that 
 although I had thought there were none 
 good but Catholics, I now believed there 
 were good and bad among all sects. She 
 then requested me not to betray her, and 
 told me the Superior intended to keep me 
 
 * When persons first enter the Convent, they take an obliga 
 tion that they will spend the remainder of their days asaRe 
 eluse, but they are put on a three months' " test" or trial, to see if 
 they have a "vocation" for that particular order; If not, they est 
 ge\ ■ ■■•My placed in another. 
 
!K A CONVENT. ill 
 
 there for life, and she thought it her duty 
 to warn me of the snares laid for me. She 
 disliked that order,* and wished me to in- 
 form her why, and in what manner I had 
 come there. I related to her then, and 
 during the next afternoon, all the particu- 
 lars. She appeared very much surprised 
 to learn that my friends had been opposed 
 to my coming, as the Superior had told 
 her that they had put me there for life. 
 She said she had been taken from the pub- 
 lic apartment, because she had been seen 
 weeping by the young ladies ; that should 
 the Superior refuse to let her go, she 
 should if possible make her escape ; and 
 named a Religieuse (Miss Mary Angela) 
 who had made her escape before. She 
 desired me, if she should be so fortunate 
 as to make her escape, to ask, in private 
 confession, permission to see my friends 
 
 • Miss Mary Francis was educated, I believe, in the Convent of 
 Saint Joseph, Emmetsburg ; also known as the order of the " Sisters 
 of Charity." She possessed an amiable disposition and superior 
 talents, and was universally admired by the inmates c? the 
 echool ; and so far as my acquaintance went, she was deserving 
 tha wteero of ev«ry «n«. 
 
112 SIX MONTHS 
 
 and consult them about going to the 
 " Sisters of Charity ;" and if they were 
 willing that I should go, she would pro- 
 cure me a situation, and by letter inform 
 me of it. She was in great distress on 
 account of that letter, which plainly un- 
 i folded the motives of the Superior. She 
 said she should appear as calm as possi- 
 ble, as it was the only way to blind the 
 eyes of the Superior, and enable her to 
 escape ; and requested me to give her all 
 the information respecting the Superior's 
 intentions that I could learn, and to listen 
 to her and the Mother Assistant's con- 
 versation at recreation hours. 
 
 At recreation the Superior observed that 
 Miss Mary Francis had no vocation for a 
 religious life, as she had refused to attend 
 the offices and prayers. At our next in- 
 terview, I inquired of Mary Francis if 
 she had refused to attend prayers; she 
 replied no ; that the Superior had discover- 
 ed her intention to escape, and had 
 orbidden her attending offices, commit- 
 
IN A CONVENT. 113 
 
 nion, and confession, for exposing her 
 feelings before the Religieuse ; and that the 
 Superior had imposed penance upon her, 
 forbidding her to walk in the garden during 
 recreation; and that the presents given her 
 by the young ladies had been, with the 
 Superior's permission, taken by some one 
 from her desk. She remarked that we 
 were exhorted to love and pray for those 
 who spitefully use us, but she could not 
 love the Community generally, they exei- 
 cised so much cruelty towards her ; that 
 the treatment she received was for no 
 other reason than because she had given 
 way to tears, which were a great relief to 
 her ; she was happy, she said, to find oris 
 who sympathized with her, and who 
 would not treat her with contempt, as the 
 others did. She said also that the Supe- 
 rior had done wrong respecting her 
 apparel. 
 
 I have now come to that part of my 
 narrative in which I must again speak 
 of the sufferings of Sist?r Magdalene. 
 
114 SIX MONTHS 
 
 One day she came from the refectory, 
 and being so much exhausted as to be 
 hardly able to ascend the stairs, I offered 
 to assist her, and the Superior reprimand- 
 ed me for it, saying her weakness was 
 feigned, and that my pity was false pity. 
 She then said to Sister Magdalene, (after 
 we were seated,) in a tone of displeasure, 
 if she did not make herself of use to the 
 " Community," she would send her back 
 to Ireland ; on which Sister Mary Magda- 
 lene rose and said, " Mamere, I would 
 like — ."* The Superior cut short what 
 she was going to say by stamping upon the 
 floor, and demanding who gave her per- 
 mission to speak, imposed on her the pen- 
 ance of kissing the floor. The Superior af- 
 ter this imposed hardships which she was 
 hardly able to sustain, frequently reminding 
 her that she had but a short time to work 
 out her salvation, and that she must do bet- 
 ter if she did not wish to suffer in purgatory. 
 
 • This, and other like half-uttered expressions, convinced me 
 hat sh« wished to return to her friends. 
 
IN A CONVENT. 115 
 
 The Superior questioned me about my 
 feelings ; wished to know why I looked 
 so solemn. I told he,r I was ill from want 
 of exercise, that I was not accustomed to 
 their mode of living, &c. She said I 
 must mention it to my Confessor, which 
 I did. The next time the Bishop visited 
 us, he was in unusually high spirits, and 
 very sociable ; and he related several sto- 
 ries, which are not worthy of notice in this 
 place. He again asked Sister Magdalene 
 when she thought of going to that happy 
 place, to receive her crown of glory. She 
 replied, " Before the celebration of our di- 
 vine Redeemer's birth, my Lord." He 
 said she ought to be very thankful that 
 she was called so soon. 
 
 I will here relate a conversation of the 
 Bishop with the Superior at recreation 
 hour, respecting the Pope, &c. After 
 talking a while in French, he said he 
 had received a long letter from the Pope, in 
 which his Holiness congratulated him for 
 his success in establishing the true religion 
 
116 SIXMO N T H Si 
 
 in the United States, and made him offers 
 of money to advance the interest of the 
 Catholic Church, and more firmly establish 
 it in America, &c. The Bishop then 
 spoke of the Orthodox in Boston, and said 
 Dr. B. had got himself in a " hornets' 
 nest," from which he could not extricate 
 himself. The Superior named a sermon 
 delivered in the North Church by an 
 Episcopalian, and said they must look 
 out or they would get themselves into a 
 " hornets nest." The Bishop mentioned 
 a visit of Dr. O'F. at Dr. B.'s, and said 
 Dr. O'F. had scarcely an opportunity to 
 say a word, on account of the noise and 
 crying of the children which were in the 
 room, and with which Dr. B. was play- 
 ing ; said he appeared more engaged with 
 the children than with the subjects of re- 
 ligion, &c. &c. Miss Mary John, the 
 Mother Assistant, exclaimed, " Is it possi- 
 ble, my Lord, that a man of God is treated 
 in such a way by heretics ?" :i Yes," said 
 the Bishop, "none but he that is unmarried 
 
IN A CONVENT. 117 
 
 careth for the things that belong to the 
 Lord, how he may please the Lord : but 
 he that is married careth for the things 
 that are of the world, how he may 
 please his wife." The Superior said 
 Dr. B. possessed very little sense, and 
 had a weak mind. The Bishop said that 
 the doctor by the course he had taken, had 
 made many converts to Catholicism; 
 " And perhaps," said the Superior, " he is 
 a wicked instrument in the hands of God 
 to bring about good." 
 
 At another time, while walking on the 
 Convent grounds, a cannon ball was 
 picked up by one of the Religieuse, and 
 the Bishop taking it, observed, as he gave 
 it to the Superior, " Here is a British ball 
 that has killed many a Yankee;" and he 
 also made several other similar observa- 
 tions. At another time the Superior told 
 the Bishop that two ladies met near the 
 Convent ; the words she used were, " One 
 Yankee met another, and said, ' I gtiessy ou 
 are a going to independence.' ' I guess 
 I be,' said the other.' They then laughed 
 
118 SIX MONTHS 
 
 heartily about it, and gave us permission 
 to hold our recreation upon it. The 
 Bishop remarked, the Yankees celebrated 
 independence day in honor of mew, and 
 appointed days of thanksgiving, instead 
 of celebrating the birthday of the Re- 
 deemer, in honor of God, &c. # 
 
 When I was again summoned to the 
 Superior, she inquired as usual into the 
 state of my feelings ; and when I said I 
 desired to see my friends, she replied, 
 " Why, my dear Agnes, do you wish to see 
 worldly friends'? Who do you call your 
 friends 1 Am not I your friend 1 Is not 
 the Bishop your friend ? If your worldly 
 friends wished to see you, would they not 
 
 • We all had permission at one time to walk with the Superior 
 in the meditation garden. The Superior heard a noise behind the 
 fence, and sent her servants to learn the cause ; they returned, in- 
 forming her that two men were looking through the fence. The 
 Superior remarked, the Bishop had said there was great danger to 
 be apprehended from such persons ; that if Protestants were to 
 offer any violence to them, the judgments of heaven would fall 
 upon the wicked ; and God had founded them upon a rock so 
 firm that it oould not fall. The Superior gave orders to the porters 
 not to allow strangers to walk over tb« grounds without her or 
 »ho Bishop's permissi< n. 
 
IN A CONVENT. 119 
 
 come and see you V ' I replied, ' ' Yes. * ' A 
 few days after this, I was taken very ill, 
 and went to the infirmary. Miss Mary 
 Francis, hearing of my illness, made an 
 errand to come to the infirmary for some 
 thread to mend her apparel, and pretend- 
 ing not to find it, asked me where the Re- 
 ligieuse put it ; and desired to know if I 
 had any good news for her. I told her I 
 had not, hut as we had permission to as- 
 semble for recreation in the afternoon, I 
 would, if I heard any, then inform her. 
 At that instant a Novice opened the door, 
 and Miss Mary Francis excused heiself, 
 by pretending that she was looking for the 
 basket of thread. We were not so strictly 
 watched for a few days as we had been, 
 but when Miss Mary Francis exposed her 
 feelings one day before Miss Mary Mag- 
 dalene and myself, we were again closely 
 watched. 1 then asked the Superior's 
 permission to write to my friends, and 
 desire them to come and see me, which 
 she granted ; and also told me to write 
 
120 SIX MONTHS 
 
 whatever I pleased. I prepared a letter 
 accordingly to my sisters, stating that I 
 did not wish to return to the world, but 
 was anxious for a visit from them, &c. 
 
 I began now to be much dissatisfied 
 with this Convent. My views of retire- 
 ment, however, were the same as ever, 
 and I thought I would go to the order of 
 the Sisters of Charity, where Miss Msry 
 Francis was educated, as she had promised 
 to introduce me there. She told me, that 
 should I be called to the public apartments, 
 (as an assistant in ornamental work.) if 
 possible, to slip a billet into Miss I.'s hand, 
 (a scholar from New York,) who would 
 convey it to her ; and I must not open my 
 mind to my confessor until I was sure 
 she had left the Community. I asked her 
 if she would take a letter for me into the 
 world ; she replied, she dare not, as the 
 Superior would examine her, and not per- 
 mit any thing to be carried from the 
 Convent into the world. We then laid 
 the following plan, to mislead the Superi- 
 
IN A C ON VEN T. 121 
 
 or in regard to our intentions. Miss Mary 
 Francis was to complain to the Superior 
 that I would not give proper attention 
 when at my lessons, and I was to tell her 
 that I could not receive any benefit from 
 Miss Mary Francis, on account of her 
 grief and absence of mind. This we 
 fulfilled to the letter. We also agreed on 
 a signal, by which I should know whether 
 she was going with or without permission. 
 If she went without permission, she was 
 to tie a string around an old book, as if to 
 Keep the leaves together, and lay it upon 
 the writing desk ; if with permission, she 
 was to make the sign of the cross three 
 times upon her lips. I had intimated my 
 desire to go with her, but she said it would 
 be more prudent for me to endeavor to 
 obtain the Superior's permission to see 
 some of my friends, and I could then 
 consult with them, and arrange matters 
 to suit me. After our conversation, she 
 knelt at the altar of the Blessed Virgin, 
 and begged God to forgive us if we acted 
 6 
 
122 SIX MONTHS 
 
 wrong in this matter; and said to me, 
 ' May we not hope for pardon in this mat- 
 ter, if the Superior can be so wicked as to 
 approach the holy of holies, and yet re- 
 ceive absolution?" She then selected from 
 a book the letters forming her real name 
 that I might write to her, should I not get 
 an opportunity to give a letter to Miss I. 
 A Religieuse entered and whispered her to 
 come away, and I never saw her after- 
 wards. 
 
 When the Bishop next visited the 
 "Community," he said he understood that 
 they were rid of that person who had 
 caused them so much trouble. They all 
 then rejoiced, because Miss Mary Francis 
 had gone. The Bishop asked whither 
 they had sent her. They answered, " To 
 her friends." Nothing more at that time 
 was said about it. 
 
 Not long after this, at private confession, 
 I was questioned very particularly in re- 
 gard to my views of remaining there foi 
 life. I told my confessor that I was con- 
 
IN A CONVENT. 123 
 
 vinced that order was too austere for me, 
 and immediately burst into tears. He 
 endeavored to comfort me by saying I 
 was not bound to that order for life ; I 
 could go to another order. I asked him 
 if I might see my friends. He answered, 
 " Yes." After receiving a promise from 
 him that I should go to any other order I 
 chose, I consented to take the vows. He 
 gave me to understand, that I need take no 
 other vows there than I should at the Con- 
 vent of the Sisters of Charity. My recep- 
 tion took place the next day. I refused the 
 white veil, because the Sisters of Charity 
 did not wear it, and it was omitted. The 
 choir was first darkened, and then lighted 
 with wax tapers. The ceremony com- 
 menced with chants, prayers, responses, 
 &c. A book was placed in my hands, 
 which contained the vows I was to take. 
 A.s near as I can recollect, the following 
 is the substance of them : — 
 
 " O, almighty and everlasting God, per- 
 
124 SIX MONTHS 
 
 mit me j a worm of the dust, to consecrate 
 myself more strictly to thee this day, in 
 presence of thy most Holy Mother, and 
 Saint Ursula, and all of thy Saints and 
 Martyrs, by living two years a Recluse, 
 and by instructing young ladies after the 
 manner of Saint Ursula, and by taking 
 upon myself her most holy vows of pov- 
 erty, chastity, and obedience, which, with 
 thy grace and assistance, I will fulfil." 
 
 They all responded, " Amen," and re- 
 peated a long office in Latin. I still con- 
 tinued to wear the black garb,^ which the 
 Bishop blessed ; also a long habit, and a 
 string of rosary beads, which were also 
 blessed by the Bishop. He wished to know, 
 one day, how Miss Mary Agnes did, after 
 taking the white vows ; to which the Supe- 
 rior replied, " Very well." He then con- 
 versed about the establishment in Boston, 
 and said that some Sisters of Charity were 
 coming to constitute a Convent either 
 
 • The apparel of a Religieuse is always kissed by the wearer, 
 •very time of putting on and taking nff 
 
IN A CONVENT. 125 
 
 there or at Mount Benedict lower esta- 
 blishment. * 
 
 Meanwhile Sister Mary Magdalene 
 was employed in the refectory. Accord- 
 ing to the Bishop she was a Saint, and he 
 said there was a Saint's body in the tomb, 
 one of the late Sisters', which remained 
 undecayed. I heard the Superior, about 
 this time, tell Miss Mary Magdalene to 
 burn all her treasures,! or she would suf- 
 fer in purgatory for her self-love ; and she 
 was afraid she did not suffer patiently, 
 for she appeared romantic. Mary Mag- 
 dalene fell prostrate at the Superior's feet, 
 and said she would fulfil any command 
 that should be laid upon her. The Supe- 
 rior gave her a penance to kiss the feet of 
 all the Religieuse, and asked them to say 
 an Ave and a Pater for her ; after which 
 
 • The Bishop in confession told me 1 could, if I preferred it, be- 
 tome one of these Sisters. 
 
 t The treasures consisted of written prayers, books, papers, a 
 ock of her mother's hair, &c, which she brought from Ireland, 
 ind kept In her desk. 
 
126 SIX MONTHS 
 
 she lay prostrate in the refectory until 
 the Angelus rung. One communion 
 morning, as I rose and was dressing, I 
 took some water, as usual, to rinse my 
 mouth, and all at once Mary Magdalene 
 appeared greatly agitated, and even in 
 agony ; made signs and crosses to signify 
 that I should commit a sacrilege were 1 
 then to approach the communion ; and I 
 then recollected that nothing must be 
 taken into the mouth on the morning be- 
 fore this sacrament. I relate this to show 
 the state of her mind. The Superior one 
 day requested the Mother Assistant to get 
 the keys of the tomb, and to have a good 
 place prepared for Mary Magdalene, who 
 forced a smile, saying she should prefer 
 hers near the undecayed Saint's bed. 
 
 As time passed on, the Superior became 
 more severe in her treatment, because I 
 objected to pursue my music. My mind 
 had been in such an unhappy state, that 
 I, for a long time, found it impossible to 
 study : and, further, I did not wish to re- 
 
IN A CONTENT. 127 
 
 ceive instruction, for I had determined not 
 to stay there. I therefore succeeded in 
 obtaining the Superior's permission to oc- 
 cupy my time chiefly with the needle, 
 and assured her that I would again study 
 when I felt better. 
 
 On one of the holy days the Bishop 
 came in, and after -playing upon his flute, 
 addressed the Superior, styling her Made- 
 moiselle, and wished to know if Mary 
 Magdalene wanted to go to her long home. 
 The Superior beckoned to her to come to 
 them, and she approached on her knees. 
 The Bishop asked her if she felt prepared 
 to die. She replied, " Yes, my Lord ; but, 
 with the permission of our Mother, I have 
 one request to make. ' ' They told her to say 
 on. She said she wished to be anointed 
 before death, if his Lordship thought her 
 worthy of so great a favor. He said, 
 " Before I grant your request, I have one 
 to make; that is, that you will implore 
 the Almighty to send down from heaven 
 a bushel of gold, for the purpose of 
 
128 SIX MONTHS 
 
 establishing a college for young men on 
 Bunker Hill. He said he had bought the 
 land for that use, and that all the Sisters 
 who had died had promised to present 
 his request, but had not fulfilled their obli- 
 gations ; "and," says he, "you must shake 
 hands in heaven with all the Sisters who 
 have gone, and be sure 'and ask them why 
 they have not fulfilled their promise, for 
 I have waited long enough ; and continue 
 to chant your office with us, while here 
 on earth, which is the sweet communion 
 of Saints." After she had given her pledge 
 and kissed his feet, he told the several 
 members of the Community, to think of 
 what they should like best. I was first 
 called to make my request. I had never 
 seen any thing of this kind before, and 
 my feelings were such as I cannot de- 
 scribe, and continuing silent, the Superior 
 bade me name it. I then said, I lacked 
 humility, and should wish for that virtue. 
 The Religieuse then made their requests : 
 one asked for grace to fulfil the vow of 
 
IN A CONVENT. 129 
 
 poverty ; another, for obedience ; a third, 
 more fervent love for the Mother of God ; 
 a fourth, more devotion to her patron 
 Saint ; a fifth, more devotion in approach- 
 ing the altar and host ; and so on. The 
 Superior ended it, by making the same re- 
 quest as the Bishop, adding, the purpose 
 intended was, that the gospel of our Lord 
 and Savior might be more extensively 
 propagated, and that all dissenters might 
 be made to turn to the true Church and 
 believe. The conversation then turned 
 upon the Pope, and the Bishop said the 
 Pope would, perhaps, before long, visit 
 this country ; and when things were more 
 improved, and his new church finished, 
 he should write to the Pope, &c. He 
 went into a relation of some parts of 
 ecclesiastical history ; spoke of the Pope's 
 being the vicegerent of Christ on earth ; 
 and that although the wicked one pre- 
 vailed now, it was designed for good, and 
 the time would come, when all would 
 look to the Pope as their spiritual director 
 
130 SIX MONTHS 
 
 on earth. He thought that America right- 
 fully belonged to the Pope, and that his 
 Holiness would take up his residence here 
 at some future day. 
 
 Not long after this, Mary Magdalene 
 was anointed for death, and tcok her 
 vows for life, but she continued to wear 
 the white veil. I thought it singular that 
 Mary Magdalene should at that time take 
 her black vows, (as they called them, ) be- 
 cause (as I learned in the Community) 
 she had not been there a year ; and her 
 wearing the white veil after taking them 
 appeared still more singular. 
 
 I will endeavor to give some idea of the 
 manner in which she took her vows, and 
 of the anointing. After she had retired 
 to her couch j* the Religieuse walked 
 to the room in procession. Sister St. 
 Clair held a wax taper blazing at her feet, 
 and the Superior knelt at her head with 
 
 • I learned that the usual custom was to place them In a black 
 coffin covered with a black pall when they were to take the black 
 voiet i but in this Instance it was omitted. 
 
IN A CONTENT. 131 
 
 the vows, which were copied on a half- 
 sheet of paper. The Bishop then came 
 in with both sacraments, all of us pros- 
 trating as he passed. After putting the 
 tabernacle upon the little altar which had 
 been placed there for that purpose, he 
 read from a book a great many prayers, 
 all of us responding. He asked her a 
 number of questions about renouncing the 
 world, which she answered. The Supe- 
 rior gave her the vows, and after pro- 
 nouncing them, she was anointed ; Sister 
 Clair laying bare her neck and feet, which 
 the Bishop crossed with holy oil, at the 
 same time repeating Latin. He then 
 gave her the viaticum, and ended the 
 ceremony as he commenced, with saying 
 Mass, and passed out, we all prostrating. 
 She lived rather longer than was expect- 
 ed, but her penances were not remitted. 
 She would frequently kneel and prostrate 
 all night long in the cold infirmary, say- 
 ing her rosary and other penances, one or 
 two of which I will mention. She wore 
 
132 SIX MONTHS 
 
 next her heart a metallic plate, in imita- 
 tation of a crown of thorns, from which I 
 was given to understand she suffered a 
 sort of martyrdom. This I often saw her 
 kiss and lay on the altar of the crucifix 
 as she retired. Another penance was, 
 the reclining upon a mattress more like a 
 table than a bed. A day or two after this, 
 the Superior, Mother Assistant, and Mary 
 Benedict, ridiculed the appearance of 
 Mary Magdalene, because of the dropsy, 
 which prevented her appearing graceful, 
 and because she was disappointed in not 
 going to heaven sooner. The Superior 
 gave her some linen capes to make, and 
 said, " Do you think you shall stay with 
 us long enough to do these, Sister?" She 
 took them, and said, " Yes, Mamere, i 
 thank you."* Notwithstanding the Su- 
 perior's severity, she sometimes appeared 
 affectionate. One day I failed in ringing 
 the observances at the usual time. I met 
 
 • She would often ask permission to take a little water, as she 
 was very thirsty ; the Superior always refused it ; but still ths 
 obedient Magdalene replied "Manure, I thank you," 
 
IN A CONVENT. 133 
 
 the Superior, and fearing she would pu- 
 nish me, I burst into tears. She embraced 
 me very affectionately, and wiped my 
 face with a handkerchief, and said I 
 should not be punished that time. She 
 once told me I might sit at meditation 
 hour, instead of kneeling, as it was very 
 tiresome. She frequently called me her 
 holy innocent, because she said I kept the 
 rules of the order, and was persevering in 
 my vocation as a Recluse. She said I 
 should see my friend Mrs. G. before long, 
 but I did not see her while I was there. 
 
 While in the Convent I asked once or 
 twice for a Bible, but never received any, 
 and never saw one while there. The 
 Bishop often said that the laity were not 
 qualified to expound the Scriptures, and 
 that the successors of the apostles alone 
 were authorized to interpret them, &c. 
 
 The Bishop, in one of his visits, spoke 
 particularly of the cholera. He told us 
 we must watch and pray more fervently, 
 
134 SIX MONTHS 
 
 or ' ' the old Scratch would snatch us off 
 with the cholera." It was recreation 
 hour, but Mary Magdalene was at work 
 in the refectory. When she came to the 
 community, she appeared like a person in 
 spasms; she tried to say li Ave Maria, 7 ' 
 and immediately fainted : we were all very 
 much alarmed. At that moment the bell 
 called us to the choir for visitation and 
 vespers. When I retired, I felt much 
 hurt to see Mary Magdalene in the cold 
 infirmary, but did not dare to express my 
 feelings. Next day, at recreation, the 
 Superior, Mother Assistant, and Mrs. 
 Mary Benedict, made a short visit to 
 Mary Magdalene, and on returning they 
 told us she was better, and in a spiritual 
 sense well ; for she had refused taking her 
 portion, or any thing eatable, as she did 
 not wish to nourish her body, because the 
 will of God had been made known Jo her 
 in a vision. We all had the promise of 
 conversing with her. but we were so con- 
 
 
IN A CONVENT. 136 
 
 stantly employed in our various offices 
 that we had no leisure. 
 • The next day, it being my turn to see 
 that all the vessels which contained holy 
 water were filled, &c, I had an opportu- 
 nity of looking at Mary Magdalene. Her 
 eyes were partly open, and her face very 
 purple ; she lay pretty still. I did not 
 dare to speak to her, supposing she would 
 think it a duty to tell of it, as it would 
 be an infraction of the rules. The next 
 night I lay thinking of her, when I was 
 suddenly startled, hearing a rattling noise, 
 as I thought, in her throat. Very soon 
 Sister Martha (the sick Lay Nun) arose, 
 and coming to her, said, " Jesus ! Mary ! 
 Joseph ! receive her soul ;" and rang the 
 bell three* times. The spirit of the gen- 
 tle Magdalene had departed. The Supe- 
 rior came, bringing a lighted wax-taper, 
 which she placed in the hand of the de- 
 ceased. She closed the eyes, and placed 
 
 * The bell was struck three times to call the Superior, twice to 
 call the Mother Assistant, and once to call Mrs. Mary Benedict, 
 
136 SIX MONTHS 
 
 a crucifix on the breast. Sister Martha 
 had whispered us to rise, and the Supe- 
 rior, observing my agitation, said, " Be 
 calm, and join with us in prayer ; she is a 
 happy soul." I knelt accordingly, re- 
 peating the litany, until the clock struck 
 two, when we all assembled in the choir, 
 in which was a fire and wax- tapers 
 burning. After meditation, matins, lauds, 
 and prayers, and a No vena (a particular 
 supplication) that our requests might be 
 granted, we assembled for diet, and for the 
 first time we had some toasted bread. We 
 also had recreation granted in the time of 
 silence. The Superior sent for us, and 
 instructed us how to appear at the burial 
 of our Sister Mary Magdalene, and ac- 
 companied us to view her corpse. She 
 was laid out in the habit of a professed 
 Nun, in a black veil; her hands were tied 
 together, and her vows placed in them. 
 The Superior remarked, that this was 
 done by the Bishop's request. At the 
 evening recreation the Bishop appeared ixk 
 
IN A CONVENT. 137 
 
 high spirits, and rejoiced that so happy a 
 soul had at last arrived in heaven ; and 
 commenced the " Dies illce" on the pi- 
 ano forte, accompanied by the voices of 
 the others. He told me I should have 
 Miss Mary Magdalene for my intercessor, 
 for she was to be canonized. The Mother 
 Superior permitted me to embrace the 
 Sisters, and gave me the Mother Assistant 
 for my Mother. She then presented us 
 with the relics of Saints, that by their 
 means we might gain indulgences. She 
 mentioned a "retreat" as being necessary 
 for our perseverance in a religious life. 
 
 The second day after this, the coffin was 
 placed in the choir, and the funeral servi- 
 ces were performed in the following man- 
 ner : Dr. O' Flaherty sang the office, while 
 the Bishop chanted it. Father Taylor 
 officiated at the altar. Four or five of 
 the altar boys were present, and dressed 
 in altar robes, &c. ; two of them held wax 
 tapers, a third holy water, a fourth a 
 crucifix. One swung incense in the cen- 
 6* 
 
138 SIX MONTHS 
 
 ser over the corpse, and another, at the 
 same time, sprinkled holy water upon it. 
 We performed our part by saying the 
 <c Dies illse." The coffin^ was then carried 
 to the tomb by two Irishmen. The 
 Bishop, Priests, and others followed, sing- 
 ing, and carrying lighted tapers and a 
 large crucifix. The corpse was also fol- 
 lowed by some of the young ladies from 
 the public schools, while the Religieuse 
 remained in the Convent. After deposit- 
 ing the coffin in the tomb, the clergy re- 
 tired to dinner. We were permitted, at 
 recreation, to hear the clergy converse on 
 various subjects. The Superior told us 
 that the customary libera and prayers for 
 faithful souls departed might be omitted, 
 as the Bishop said Magdalene's soul had 
 gone immediately to heaven. The No- 
 vices were permitted to relate visions of 
 guardian angels, &c. At the next evening 
 
 • My feelings were much hurt to witness the manner in which 
 Um lid of the coffin was forced down to its place. The corpse 
 had Bwollen much, and become too large fbr the coffin. 
 
IN A CONVENT. J 39 
 
 recreation the Bishop again visited us, 
 and appeared in very good spirits, played 
 on his flute and sung. He soon went 
 away, and the Superior said he only came 
 to cheer up our spirits. 
 
 Having only a few minutes to stay at 
 confession, I had until this time kept the 
 secret of my friend Mary Francis ; but 
 the Bishop perceiving that I grew more 
 discontented, endeavored to comfort me, 
 by saying that I was not bound to that 
 order ; but he wished to know more par- 
 ticularly my reasons for disliking it, and 
 began to threaten me with judgments ; 
 and observing my agitation, said he 
 must know what lay so heavily on my 
 mind. He asked me if it was any thing 
 connected with the sickness and death of 
 Mary Magdalene. I told him, " No, not 
 that in particular ; I do not like the Su- 
 perior." He said I must tell him instant- 
 ly all the wicked thoughts that had dis- 
 turbed my mind, and asked me various 
 improper questions, the meaning of which 
 
1 40 SIX MONTHS 
 
 I did not then understand, and which I 
 decline mentioning. I was so confused 
 that I inadvertently spoke Mary Francis' 
 name, and begged his pardon for listening 
 to her ; and he immediately exclaimed, 
 "Ah! I know all; confess tome what 
 she told you, and do not dare to deceive 
 me ; you cannot deceive God. 1 ' I told him 
 nearly all that had passed between Mary 
 Francis and myself. He said that Mary 
 Francis was not a fit subject for any or- 
 der, and they were obliged to send her 
 away ; that she was deranged, and I had 
 done very wrong in listening to an insane 
 person. He said I could not go to the 
 order she mentioned, and that I would be 
 more happy with the Sisters of Charity 
 who were coming to reside here. He 
 said that worldlings hated me for the good 
 part I had chosen, and would ridicule me 
 should I go back to the world, and then 
 repeated some scripture texts. I still per- 
 sisted in saying it was my determination 
 not to remain in that order, and I told hitti 
 
IN A CONVENT. 141 
 
 I disliked the Superior ; and he gave me 
 a penance to perform. 1 was desirous at 
 that time to. have them think me obedi- 
 ent, or I should not have condescended to 
 such humiliations. My motive was 'pru- 
 dence, not want of courage, for by this 
 time I had become disgusted with the 
 life I led, and their manner of pro- 
 ceeding. 
 
 The next time the Bishop was with us, 
 he requested me to sing any favorite tune 
 I chose. I sang the "Ode on Science," 
 which, every one knows, is highly patri- 
 otic. At the close of the first stanza, he 
 spoke a few words in French to the Su- 
 perior, who made a signal for me to stop ; 
 but not understanding her, I continued, 
 until she had made several signals, when 
 I perceived she was evidently displeased 
 with my singing, and then recalled the 
 words which I supposed were offensive. 
 
 One day the Superior asked me what it 
 was that lay so heavily on my mind, as 
 the Mother Assistant had previously 
 
142 SIX MONTHS 
 
 found me in tears while at our examina- 
 tion of conscience. I excused myself by 
 replying I was thinking of my dear 
 mother, (which, though true, was not the 
 cause of my grief.) She then left me, 
 but not without distrust, the eyes of the 
 Community being upon me. The next 
 time we met at recreation, one of them 
 remarked she hoped there was not 
 another Judas among them. I endea- 
 vored to betray no emotion, but they still 
 mistrusted I had other views ; for while 
 sitting at my diet in the refectory, I ob- 
 served my food was of a kind that I had 
 never seen before. It consisted of several 
 balls of a darkish color, about the size of 
 a nutmeg, of a bitter astringent taste ; 
 what they were I never knew. I ate 
 them as I did my other diet, and strove to 
 exhibit no fearful sensations. 
 
 A few days after the death of Mary 
 Magdalene, her desk was brought for- 
 ward, that the Superior might examine it, 
 and distribute its contents to those she 
 
IN A CONVENT. 143 
 
 considered the most worthy. She gave 
 to each one some little relic, and to Miss 
 Mary Joseph, sister to Magdalene, some 
 letters which she had composed to be 
 read, as the Superior said, after her 
 death. They were quite affecting, and 
 caused Mary Joseph to weep much, for 
 which the Superior reprimanded her. 
 
 Some days after this, the Superior sent 
 for me to practise music, and then made 
 a signal for me to follow her into the 
 Bishop's room. This room is separated 
 from the others by shutters, with curtains 
 drawing on the chapel side. When I had 
 kissed her feet, she desired to know why 
 I cried at my practice in the choir. I 
 rather imprudently answered, {£ I could 
 not tell; I did not cry much." (It then 
 struck me. she could not have seen me, 
 as I was alo?ie.) I said I was very cold,* 
 particularly my feet ; and I had been prac- 
 tising " Blue-eyed Mary," and was af- 
 
 • The rooms were seldom comfortably warmed, and at timet I 
 suffered much from the cold. 
 
1 44 SIX MONTHS 
 
 fected by the words. She said that what 
 I asserted was false, and commanded 
 me to tell her the true cause, in a mo- 
 ment ; and pulling the handkerchief from 
 my hand, she bade me kneel and tell her 
 at once, or I should be punished. I was 
 so frightened by the threats and manner 
 of the Superior, that I sobbed aloud, and 
 blood gushed from my nose and mouth. 
 She then seized and shook me by the 
 arm, and seated me, saying, " Hush! be 
 calm, or the young ladies may hear you 
 as they pass the door to go to their prac- 
 tice." She asked me again and again to 
 tell her why I shed tears in the choir, and 
 why I felt such a repugnance to commu- 
 nicate my thoughts. I replied, because I 
 had made a promise not to tell, and I could 
 not break it. The Superior turned pale, 
 but suppressing her feelings, bade me break 
 that promise directly, and asked to whom 
 I had made it. I replied I could not tell 
 any one but my confessor. Says she, em- 
 bracing me, " What ! my dear Sister, not 
 
IN A CONVENT. 145 
 
 obey your Superior! tell me, my dear, 
 and I will stand responsible for you be- 
 fore the judgment seat. To whom did 
 you make the promise? — to Mary Mag- 
 dalene or Mary Francis V She also asked 
 me if I had related all the causes of 
 my discontent in confession. I replied, 
 "Not all," and began to weep again. She 
 endeavored to console me, saying she 
 could not heal my wounds unless I 
 opened my whole feelings to her; and 
 comparing her words to those of our di- 
 vine Redeemer, took me by the hand, and 
 with seeming affection told me to unfold 
 all my feelings to her, as to an own 
 mother ; and said she should think it her 
 duty to stay by me until I should relate 
 the cause of my grief, that she might 
 pour into my heart a heavenly balm, &c. 
 I told her I had not seen or heard from 
 my friends, to whom I had written. She 
 said that was nothing to the point ; she 
 was my friend ; and asked me if I called 
 persons who insulted the house of God 
 7 
 
146 SIX MONTHS 
 
 my friends. I replied, " No." She then 
 said one person had been there who 
 called herself my sister, and who threw 
 pebbles at the Convent. She also men- 
 tioned another person, who came with my 
 sister, and whom she said she would not 
 take to " wipe her feet on.''* After 
 
 • I learn from my sister that while I was in the Convent she 
 and another young lady went there to invite me to my sister M.'s 
 wedding. She asked the portress if I could be seen at that hour, 
 who replied she would see, and asked her to walk in, inquired 
 her name, &c. went out, and soon returned with the answer that 
 the scholars were not permitted to come to the parlor that day. 
 My sister told her it was important that she should see mo, and 
 she could not come away without. The portress left the room, 
 returned, closed the shutters, retired, and presently the Superior 
 entered, walking between two servants, and made signs for my 
 sister to approach, inquiring hers and the other lady's names, 
 and their business. On being informed, she mentioned that I 
 could not be seen, but she would deliver any message my sister 
 desired ; that the young ladies never violated the rules for 
 the sake of seeing company, and that I did not wish to see any 
 worldly friends, or have any communication with them ; that my 
 mind was wholly occupied with heavenly things; that I was per- 
 fectly happy, and "growing as fat as butter ;" that I was fast im- 
 proving in my studies, learning music, and drawing, (untrue.') In 
 consequence of my sister's weeping, and desiring her to name a 
 lime when 1 could be seen, the Superior said she would go and 
 inquire whether I desired to see her. The Superior soon returned, 
 and told my sister that I did not wish to see her, or any worldly 
 pelatire ; but the Superior told her that if I chose I could come to 
 
IN A CONVENT. 147 
 
 making this observation, she left me for a 
 few moments, to compose myself. Re- 
 turning, she asked if I knew where I 
 was, and if I had concluded to obey her, 
 or break my vow of obedience and be 
 severely punished. I answered, " No ! 
 Mamere, I will tell all I can remember;" 
 for I judged from her threats and looks 
 that I should be confined in a cellar, or 
 have something more severe than usual 
 inflicted upon me. The rules of the 
 orlef also led me to think so. But not- 
 withstanding my fear of the Superior, I 
 still kept secret the real name of Miss 
 Mary Francis, and her promise of writ- 
 ing to Mrs. G. or my friends respecting 
 my situation. She then dismissed me for 
 a while. But my thoughts soon whispered 
 
 the wedding. They both left the Convent with the impression 
 that I was a public scholar, and could leave when I chose ; and 
 thought it passing strange that I should refuse to see them, as I 
 had, before going to the Convent, requested them to visit me. My 
 sister imagined that I had become so infatuated with the Catholic 
 religion as to lose all sisterly affection for those who were avers? 
 to it, and went away weeping. 
 
148 SIX MONTHS 
 
 me that our " Ghostly Father" (as our 
 Directory taught us to call him) had made 
 the Superior acquainted with what passed 
 in secret confession, because without such 
 knowledge she never could have used 
 such threatening language, and never 
 could have been displeased, as she was, 
 at words which I had used in secret con- 
 fession alone with the Bishop. She asked 
 me how I dared to converse with Mary 
 Francis on the slate. Now she never 
 could have known this only from the 
 Bishop. I was never fully aware of their 
 arts in getting at secrets by confession 
 until they became too visible to be misun- 
 derstood. I then became more reserved, 
 and the Superior remarked that 1 did not 
 show so much frankness of manner as 
 formerly; the reason of which the 
 reader will understand to be, that every 
 eye was on me. A different course I 
 could not adopt, having lost confidence in 
 my confessor. I did not follow his ad- 
 vice, but resolved to follow, as nearly as 
 
IN A CONVENT. 149 
 
 I could conscientiously, the advice of 
 Mary Francis, being confident she was 
 my friend. 
 
 I felt a repugnance at the idea of re- 
 turning to the world, supposing that 
 many would believe me a person roman- 
 tic and visionary, and inexperienced in 
 the ways of the world, and therefore unfit 
 for society. And I was also particularly 
 averse to taking this step, because of 
 the solemn promise of seclusion which I 
 had taken. Nevertheless, I resolved to 
 leave that Convent, and write to Miss 
 Mary Francis from my friend Mrs. G.'s, 
 but was undetermined whether I should 
 return to the world. I had reason to 
 think that my letters were never sent to 
 my friends, and determined to convey one 
 privately. I stole a few moments and 
 hastily wrote some lines with my pencil, 
 and hid them behind the altar ; but the 
 billet was discovered, and I never heard 
 from it. 
 
 It was my turn that week to read as 
 
150 SIX MONTHS 
 
 "lecturess." A book was placed before 
 me in the refectory, called "Rules of Saint 
 Augustine," and the place marked to 
 read was concerning a Religicuse receiv- 
 ing letters clandestinely. I could not 
 control my feelings, for what I read was 
 very affecting. At this time we were di- 
 rected to remain in the refectory, instead 
 of assembling in the community, and told 
 to repeat " Hail Mary" before a picture. 
 The Superior and Mother Assistant con- 
 sented to have me practise music no 
 more during the cold weather. They 
 also permitted me to wear warmer 
 clothing. 
 
 One day as I was sitting alone in the 
 refectory, in the time of silence, the Su- 
 perior came in, and after kneeling and ex- 
 tending her arms in the form of a cross, 
 she kissed the floor, and rising, walked 
 towards the door ; returning, she seated 
 herself on the bench beside me. I asked 
 her if I should bring a chair ; she an- 
 swered, " No," and inquired how I felt, 
 
IN A CONVENT. 151 
 
 and why I changed color while at the 
 table. I replied that my mouth was very 
 sore, and it hurt me to read. She wished 
 to know what made my mouth sore. I 
 told her I thought it was something I had 
 eaten. She said, laughingly, it was the 
 canker, and asked if it was not sent as a 
 judgment for some sin. I replied that I 
 did not know ; I had not felt very well for 
 some days, and thought it. was partly 
 owing to want of exercise. She then 
 sent Sister Martha to conduct me into a 
 room at the farther part of the Convent, 
 for the first time, called a ll mangle 
 room" There were some Sisters there 
 kneeling in devotion, and one turning a 
 machine used for pressing clothes, instead 
 of ironing them, called a mangle. She 
 presented me with some altar laces, and 
 told me to have them prepared for the 
 altar the next day at the ringing of the 
 bell. While there I was watched very 
 narrowly ; but as I had gathered from the 
 Superior's conversation, at different times, 
 
152 SIX MONTHS 
 
 that the gates were watched by the por- 
 ters and dogs, which were of great value 
 to the Convent, I did not dare, then, to 
 make my escape, but appeared as cheerful 
 as possible. The Sisters appeared very 
 happy, it being a day of recreation in the 
 Community, and the celebration of some 
 great Saint. The Superior, as she passed 
 her portrait, remarked, that she never 
 looked at it but that it reminded her of 
 smiling. She appeared in unusually good 
 spirits, and gave us permission to wish 
 each other happy feasts, not of luxury 
 and feasting, in the common acceptation 
 of the terms, but of prayers to the Saints 
 to free us from purgatory. In the course 
 of the Superior's conversation, she said 
 she had read in the newspapers of a new 
 law which had been passed, that no per- 
 son who was under the age of twenty- 
 eight or thirty years should be allowed to 
 keep any school. The Mother Assistant 
 approved of this law, and said it was 
 good as it would remove the difficulty 
 
INA CONVENT. 153 
 
 which overseers had with young teachers 
 who were unfit to take charge of a school, 
 particularly the discipline. 
 
 I would here confess my fault (if a fault 
 it was) of not acknowledging all my obli- 
 gations in secret confession, and of pre- 
 tending to think Mary Francis deranged ; 
 and also of acquiescing in the Superior's 
 commands in her presence with feigned 
 h umility. I did this that my design should 
 not be suspected. 
 
 A letter was read to the Community, 
 that was addressed to the Superior, from 
 Bishop P., of Emmetsburg. In it he re- 
 joiced to learn that the " Community" 
 was set free of that person who was de- 
 ranged, and whose disposition he had 
 known to his sorrow from her youth. He 
 lamented the departure of Magdalene, 
 who no doubt was a Saint ueigning in 
 glory, after what she had been willing to 
 suffer to gain salvation.^ I was sent for 
 
 • Since leaving the Convent I have written to Miss Mary 
 Francis for information in regard to this letter, but have received 
 no satisfactory answer. I have however received from her three 
 letters. 
 
154 SIX MONTHS 
 
 to attend the Superior in the Bishop's 
 room, after Mass. She was folding his 
 cassoc and robe. When I entered, she 
 bade me do as my Directory taught, and 
 said I had let trifles make an impression 
 upon me, and weak minds only allowed 
 trifles to affect them. Giving me the let- 
 ter, she bade me tell her what I thought 
 of it. I read it, and said I could not be- 
 lieve what Mary Francis had told me, if 
 she were deranged, but yet I had rather 
 go to the Convent where she was edu- 
 cated than stay at that on Mount Bene- 
 dict. She asked me if I thought of going 
 without protection ? I begged of her to let 
 me see some of my friends there, or permit 
 me to return to the world. After saying 
 she had sent my letters* to my friends, 
 who, if they wished, could come there and 
 see me, she told me not to trouble myself, 
 for the Bishop would soon be there, and I 
 could talk with him about it.f 
 
 • My friends never received any letter from me. 
 
 t I cai. ot reinr m jcr all that passed in confesoion, for I was at 
 
IN A CONVENT. 155 
 
 One Sabbath after Mass, while we were 
 m the choir repeating the examination of 
 conscience or monthly review, I was 
 called in a whisper into the community, 
 with the rest of the Sisters, but pretended 
 not to hear. The others went in while 1 
 remained. I heard the Bishop speak to 
 them as they went in. But I had absented 
 myself from confession and communion 
 that day, and did not wish to see the 
 Bishop on account of his previous 
 language. After the doors had been 
 opened several times, one of the Pteli- 
 gieuse (Sister Marth.v* ) came in and 
 knelt with me. The bell then rang, and I 
 went into the refectory, waiting as usual 
 
 this time much confused ; however, the Bishop asked me how I 
 should like to go to a Convent in Canada, which I objected to. 
 
 • I will not presume to say much about Sister Martha, as I never 
 conversed with her, and therefore was not so able to judge of her 
 sufferings, Sec. She was a professed Lay Religieuse, and I be- 
 lieve an American. She was called the Portress, and one of 
 those (I learned) who chose rather to be a doorkeeper than to 
 dwell among the wicked. She, together with three of the Choir 
 Religieuse, lodged in the infirmary with me. While she slept 
 there, she (as did Magdalene) coughed at intervals during the 
 night. Sister Martha often approached the Superior kneeling and 
 weeping. 
 
156 SIX MONTHS 
 
 for the Mother Assistant's instructions in 
 the Latin office. Sister Martha soon 
 entered, and asked if I knew where the 
 Mother Assistant was, and whether I had 
 been into the community since Mass. I 
 replied, No, but was waiting for the Mother 
 Assistant. After saying office I went 
 down to the refectory to string some rosary 
 beads, and afterwards returned to the 
 choir, where the Novices were telling their 
 beads. The Superior came in to join in 
 devotion, and remained until diet. As we 
 were proceeding to diet, I accidentally 
 touched the Superior; she looked at me, 
 and appeared much displeased. At re- 
 creation the Religieuse were very desirous 
 to learn the state of my mind. I strove 
 to appear unembarrassed, and answered 
 their questions with seeming ignorance. 
 I was not censured for my transgression 
 of the rules, nor was any remark made 
 upon it. 
 
 In the evening we were permitted to 
 sit in the community, which had been 
 
IN A CONVENT. 157 
 
 warmed. After repeating the offices, and 
 during the time of silence, a dog barked 
 in front of the community, and we heard 
 a noise like some one thumping upon 
 the doors. The Religieuse fell down 
 before the altar, and appeared much 
 frightened. I kept my seat, but at that 
 moment heard the window raised, and 
 the Superior ask who was there. No 
 answer was made to her inquiry. 1 then 
 felt somewhat alarmed, but endeavored to 
 betray as little fear as possible. What 
 this noise was, or for what reason it was 
 made, I never could learn, but I have 
 supposed it was done to see if I was easily 
 alarmed. The like had several times 
 occurred. 
 
 About this time the martyrologies of 
 some Saints were read at table ; also the 
 history of Saints who had been tempted 
 by Satan. Perhaps it may be well to re- 
 ate one or two. A certain Saint, who 
 was strongly tempted by Satan, retired to 
 a desert, and confined himself to a cell, 
 scarcely large enough for him to lie at 
 
158 SIX MONTHS 
 
 ease. He retired here for pious purposes. 
 After mortifying his body for a long time, 
 he prayed for rain that he might quench 
 his thirst, which was granted. A bird 
 came and brought him food, which renew- 
 ed his strength, and he returned to his Mo- 
 nastery, and was never more troubled 
 with the temptations of Satan. 
 
 Some noblemen once invited a poor 
 wandering monk, who was begging for 
 the Monastery, to dine with them on 
 Friday. They helped him to meat ; he 
 made the sign of the cross, refusing to eat 
 it. They asked the reason, and drawing 
 their swords, threatened his life unless he 
 did eat it. He told them if they would 
 allow him a few minutes that he might 
 pray, and give him a pewter plate to cover 
 the meat, he would eat it. After pray- 
 ing a few minutes that the meat might 
 become fish, he took off the plate, and be- 
 hold it was fish ; and he then sat down 
 and ate, and they believed him an inspired 
 man. 
 
 Manv accounts of those who had be- 
 
IN A CONVENT. 159 
 
 come Saints were so disagreeable and 
 even revolting, that I will not attempt to 
 relate or describe them. 
 
 As several of my friends desire to learn 
 something concerning the scholars, I will 
 relate what little I know. I never had 
 permission to enter any of the rooms in 
 the recluse apartments, except those be- 
 fore named, and never to the public apart- 
 ments, except on examination days, when 
 the Superior and Bishop were present. 
 During one vacation, the young ladies 
 who remained were permitted to visit the 
 Community, to give the members pre- 
 sents.* I never spoke to them but to thank 
 them for a present. They were some- 
 times at vacation permitted to enter the 
 Community and embrace the Religieuse. 
 
 Complaints were often brought to the 
 Superior while at recreation, and some- 
 times repeated aloud. They were gene- 
 rally violations of the iides, which were 
 very strict. They were sometimes pun- 
 
 •'Allhoiigh we received presents, we were not allowed to keep 
 them. 
 
160 SIX MONTHS 
 
 ished for refusing to say prayers to the 
 Saints, which they said their parents dis- 
 approved of; also for refusing to read 
 Roman Catholic history. A Miss T., of 
 C, was brought to the Superior, and 
 reprimanded for writing her discontents 
 to her friends. The Superior destroyed 
 one half the letter, and gave me the 
 blank leaf to write a prayer on. Another 
 was reprimanded severely because she 
 had said to the other young misses she 
 should be glad when the time came for 
 her to leave the Convent, &c. The Su- 
 perior, shaking her severely, obliged her 
 to kneel and perform an act of contrition, 
 by kissing the floor, and saying that she 
 was very sorry that she had offended her 
 teachers, and begged the forgiveness 
 of all. 
 
 Some of the young ladies were appa- 
 rently great favorites of the Superior and 
 Bishop. They sometimes sent for them 
 to bestow presents and caress them. One 
 young lady, of whom the Bishrp was 
 
IN A CONVENT. 161 
 
 guardian, was treated very ill. I often 
 saw her in tears, and once heard the 
 teacher tell the Superior that it was he- 
 cause she had no dress suitable to wear 
 into the world to see her friends. She 
 was designed, as I learned, to be a teacher 
 in a Convent in Canada. 
 
 A number of the young ladies were 
 unhappy, whose names I have forgotten. 
 I learned that they disliked the discipline. 
 
 After this the Superior was sick of the 
 influenza, and I did not see her for two 
 or three days. I attended to my offices 
 as usual, such as preparing the wine and 
 the water, the chalice, host, holy water, 
 and vestments, &c. One day, however, I 
 had forgotten to attend to this duty at the 
 appointed hour, but recollecting it, and 
 fearing lest I should offend the Superior 
 by reason of negligence, I asked per- 
 mission to leave the room, telling a No- 
 vice that our Mother had given me per- 
 mission to attend to it ; she answered, 
 " O yes, Sister, you can go then." I went 
 7# 
 
162 SIX MONTHS 
 
 immediately to the chapel, and was 
 arranging the things for Mass, which 
 was to take place the next day. While 
 "busily employed, 1 heard the adjoining 
 door open, and the Bishop's voice dis- 
 tinctly. Being conscious that I was 
 there at the wrong hour, I kept as still 
 as possible, lest I should be discovered. 
 While in this room I overheard the fol- 
 lowing conversation between the Bish- 
 op and Superior. The Bishop, aftei 
 taking snufT in his usual manner, began 
 by saying, ° Well, well, what does Agnes 
 say? how does she appear?" I heard 
 distinctly from the Superior in reply, that, 
 " According to all appearances, she is 
 either possessed of insensibility or great 
 command." The Bishop walked about 
 the room, seeming much displeased with 
 the Superior, and cast many severe and 
 improper reflections upon Mary Francis, 
 who, it was known, had influenced me; all 
 which his Lordship will well remember. 
 He then told the Superior that the esta- 
 
IN A CONVENT. 163 
 
 blishment was in its infancy ; and that it 
 would not do to have such reports go 
 abroad as these persons would carry ; that 
 Agnes must be taken care of; that they 
 had better send her to Canada, and that 
 a carriage could cross the line in two or 
 three days. He added, by way of repe- 
 tition, that it would not do for the Pro- 
 testants to get hold of those things and 
 make another u fuss." He then gave the 
 Superior instructions how to entice me 
 into the carriage, and they soon both left 
 the room and I heard no more. 
 
 The reader may well judge of my 
 feelings at this moment; a young and 
 inexperienced female, shut out from the 
 world, and entirely beyond the reach of 
 friends ; threatened with speedy trans- 
 portation to another country, and invo- 
 luntary confinement for life, with no pow- 
 er to resist the immediate fulfilment of the 
 startling conspiracy I had overheard. It 
 was with much difficulty that I controlled 
 my feelings, but aware of the importance 
 
164 SIX MONTHS 
 
 t>f not betraying any knowledge of what 
 had taken place, I succeeded in returning to 
 the refectory unsuspected. I now became 
 firmly impressed that unless I could con- 
 trive to break away from the Convent 
 soon, it would be forever too late ; and that 
 every day I remained rendered my escape 
 more difficult. 
 
 The next day I went to auricular con- 
 fession, not without trembling and fear, 
 lest 1 should betray myself. But having 
 committed my case to God, I went some- 
 what relieved in my feelings. At a pre- 
 vious confession I had refused to go to 
 Canada, but at this time, in reply to the 
 Bishop's inquiry, I answered that I would 
 consider the subject ; for I thought it 
 wrong to evince any want of fortitude, 
 especially when I had so much need of 
 it. I did not alter my course of conduct, 
 fearing that if I appeared perfectly con- 
 tented I should be suspected of an inten- 
 tion to escape. 
 
 It was my turn during that week tot 
 
IN A CONVENT. 165 
 
 officiate in the offices. While reading, I 
 felt something rise in my throat, which 
 two or three times I tried to swallow, but 
 it still remained. I felt alarmed, it being 
 what I had never before experienced. # 
 At recreation I was asked what ailed me, 
 and replied that I could not tell ; but I de- 
 scribed my feelings, and was told I was 
 vaporish. 
 
 They were very desirous that week to 
 know if my feelings were changed. I 
 said they were, and endeavored to make 
 it appear to them that Satan had left me. 
 But in reality I feared I should never es- 
 cape from them, though I had determined 
 to do so the first opportunity. 
 
 I was in the habit of talking in my 
 sleep, and had often awoke and found the 
 Religieuse kneeling around my couch, 
 and was told that they were praying for 
 me. Fearing lest I should let fall some 
 word or words which would betray me, 
 I tied a handkerchief around my face, de- 
 
 • I hare since narned the circumstance to a physician, who say« 
 it was /ear alone, 
 
166 SIX MONTHS 
 
 termining if observed to give the appear- 
 ance of having the teeth ache, and so 
 avoid detection. For some days I was 
 not well, and my mind, as may naturally 
 be supposed, sympathized with my body, 
 and many things occurred that were to 
 me unpleasant, which I shall pass un- 
 noticed. 
 
 But what I have now to relate is of im- 
 portance. A few days after, while at my 
 needle in the refectory, I heard a carriage 
 drive to the door of the Convent, and 
 heard a person step into the Superior's 
 room. Immediately the Superior passed 
 lightly along the passage which led to the 
 back entry, where the men servants or 
 porters were employed, and reprimanded 
 them in a loud tone for something they 
 were doing. She then opened the door of 
 the refectory, and seemed indifferent about 
 entering, but at length seated herself be- 
 side me, and began conversation, by say- 
 ing, " Well, my dear girl, what do you 
 think o£ going to see your friends?" I 
 
IN A CONVENT. 167 
 
 said, " What friends, Mamere?" said she, 
 "You would like to see your friends 
 Mrs. G., and Father B., and talk with 
 them respecting your call to another 
 order." Before I had time to answer, 
 she commenced taking oft' my garb, telling 
 me she was in haste, and that a carriage 
 was in waiting to convey me to my 
 friends. I answered, with as cheerful a 
 countenance as I could assume, " O, Ma- 
 mere, I am sorry to give you so much 
 trouble ; I had rather see them here first." 
 While we were conversing I heard a little 
 bell ring several times. The Superior 
 said, "Well, my dear, make up your mind; 
 the bell calls me to the parlor." She soon 
 returned, and asked if I had made up my 
 mind to go. I answered, " No, Mamere." 
 She then said I had failed in obedience to 
 her, and as I had so often talked of going 
 to another order with such a person as 
 Mary Francis, I had better go immedi- 
 ately ; and again she said, raising her 
 voice, " You have failed in respect to your 
 
168 SIX MONTHS 
 
 Superior ; you must recollect that I am a 
 lady of quality, brought up in opulence, 
 and accustomed to all the luxuries of 
 life." I told her that I was very sorry to 
 have listened to any thing wrong against 
 her dignity. She commanded me to 
 kneel, which I did ; and if ever tears were 
 a relief to me they were then. She 
 stamped upon the floor violently, and 
 asked, if I was innocent, why I did not 
 go to communion. I told her I felt un- 
 worthy to go to communion at that time.* 
 The bell again rang, and she left the 
 room, and in a few moments returning, 
 desired me to tell her immediately 
 what I thought of doing, for as she had 
 promised to protect me forever, she must 
 know my mind. She then mentioned 
 that the carriage was still in waiting. I 
 still declined going, for I was convinced 
 
 • My eyes were opened ; I found myself in an error, and had 
 been too enthusiastic in my first views of a Convent life. I was 
 discontented with my situation, and was using some deception 
 towards the Superior and the Religieuse, in order to effect an es- 
 cape ; therefore I did not feel worthy to attend communion. 
 
IN A CONVENT. 169 
 
 their object was not to carry me to Mrs. 
 G. and Priest B., to consult about another 
 order, but directly to Canada. I told her 
 I had concluded to ask ray confessor's ad- 
 vice, and meditate on it some longer. 
 She rather emphatically said, " You can 
 meditate on it if you please, and do as you 
 like about going to see your friends." 
 She said that my sister had been there, 
 and did not wish to see me. Our con- 
 versation was here interrupted by the 
 entrance of a Novice. The Superior then 
 gave me my choice, either to remain on 
 Mount Benedict, or go to some other 
 order, and by the next week to make up 
 my mind, as it remained with me to de- 
 cide. She then gave me a heavy penance 
 to perform, which was, i?istead of going 
 to the choir as usual at the ringing of the 
 bell, to go to the mangle room and repeat 
 " Ava Marias" while turning the mangle. 
 While performing my penance, Sister 
 Martha left the room, and soon returning, 
 said she had orders to release me from 
 
170 SIX MONTHS 
 
 my penance, and to direct me to finish 
 my meditations on the picture of a Saint, 
 which she gave me. But instead of saying 
 the prayers that I was biddeu, I fervently 
 prayed to be delivered from their wicked 
 hands. 
 
 They appeared much pleased with my 
 ^j_rmosprl reformation, and I think they 
 believed me sincere. The Superior, as a 
 test of my humility, kept me reading ; that 
 is, made no signal for me to stop, until 
 the diet was over, when a plate of apple 
 parings, the remnant of her dessert, was 
 brought from the Superior's table, and the 
 signal given for me to lay down my book 
 and eat them.^ I ate &few of them only, 
 hoping they might think my abstaining 
 from the remainder self-denial in me, and 
 not suspect me of discontent or disobedi- 
 ence. 1 performed all my penances with 
 apparent cheerfulness. 
 
 The Bishop visited the Convent on the 
 
 • This was the second time I had been presented with apple 
 parings by the Superior. 
 
IN A CONVENT. 171 
 
 next holy day, and on their remarking 
 that he had been absent some time, he 
 made many excuses ; one of which was, 
 he had been engaged in collecting money 
 to establish the order of the " Sisters of 
 Charity" where the "Community" once 
 lived ; and he spoke of the happiness of the 
 life of a " Religieuse" of this order. After 
 he played on the piano, M Away with Me- 
 lancholy," the Superior asked me to play, 
 and the Bishop said, " By all means." I 
 complied, but my voice faltered through 
 fear, when Miss Mary Benedict apolo- 
 gized for me. by saying I had not prac- 
 tised much lately, on account of the 
 Mother Assistant's engagements, and the 
 young ladies occupying all the instru- 
 ments. She showed the Bishop a robe 
 which I had been busy in working for 
 him. He said I must not on any account 
 neglect my music. After telling one of 
 his stories about a monk who had diso- 
 beyed the rules of his order until Satan 
 took possession of him, he left us, say- 
 
172 SIX MONTHS 
 
 ing he hoped " old Scratch" would not 
 take possession of our hearts as he did that 
 monk's, and hoped that we should never 
 have another Judas in the Community. 
 
 Some days after the conversation which 
 I heard between the Bishop and Superior 
 while behind the altar, I was in the re- 
 fectory at my work, and heard the noise 
 of the porters, who were employed saw- 
 ing wood, and I conjectured the gate might 
 be open for them. I thought it a good op- 
 portunity to escape, which I contemplated 
 doing in this manner, viz. : to ask permis- 
 sion to leave the room, and as I passed the 
 entry, to secrete about my habit a hood 
 which hung there, that would help to con- 
 ceal part of my garb from particular obser- 
 vation; then to feign an errand to the infir- 
 marian from the Superior, as I imagined I 
 could escape by the door of the infirmary. 
 This plan formed, and just as I was going, 
 I heard a band of music, playing, as it 
 seemed, in front of the Convent. I heard 
 the young ladies assembling in the parlor, 
 
IN A CONVENT. 173 
 
 and the porters left their work, as I sup- 
 posed, for the noise of the saws ceased. 
 I felt quite revived, and was more confi- 
 dent I should be able to escape without 
 detection, even should it be necessary to 
 get over the fence. I feigned an errand, 
 and asked permission of Miss Mary Austin 
 to leave the room,* which she granted. 
 I succeeded in secreting the hood, and the 
 book in which Miss Mary Francis had left 
 her address, and then knocked at the door 
 three times which led to the lay apart- 
 ments. A person came to the door, who 
 appeared in great distress.! 
 
 • Sister Martha (the sick Religieuse) was scouring the floor 
 at this time, which I saw was quite too hard for her. Not 
 long after I left, I inquired after her, and learned she was no 
 more. 
 
 t This was Sarah S., (a domestic,) who appeared very unhappy 
 while I was in the Convent. I often saw her in tears, and learned 
 from the Superior that she was sighing for the veil. When I saw 
 my brother I informed him of this circumstance, and he soon found 
 who she was, and ascertained that some ladies in Cambridge had 
 been to see the Superior, who used to them pretty much the same 
 language she did to my sister. I have since seen her. She is 
 still under the influence of the Roman Church, but assures me 
 that she did not refuse to see the ladies, as the Superior had repre- 
 sented to them, and she wept because of ill health, &c. 
 
1 74 SIX MONTHS 
 
 I asked her where Sister Bennet and 
 Sister Bernard were ; she left me to find 
 them. I gave the infirmarian to under- 
 stand that the Superior wished to see her, 
 and I desired her to go immediately to her 
 room. These gone, I unlocked and passed 
 out the back door, and as the gate ap- 
 peared shut, I climbed upon the slats 
 which confined the grape vines to the 
 fence; but they gave way, and falling to 
 the ground, I sprained my wrist. 1 then 
 thought I would try the gate, which I 
 found unfastened, and as there was no one 
 near it, I ran through, and hurried to the 
 nearest house. In getting over the fences 
 between the Convent and this house, I fell 
 and hurt myself badly. On reaching the 
 house, I fell exhausted upon the door step ; 
 but rising as soon as possible, I opened the 
 door, and was allowed to enter. I inquired 
 if Catholics lived there ; one answered, 
 " No." For some time I could answer 
 none of their questions, being so much 
 exhausted. 
 
IN A CONVENT. 175 
 
 As soon as they understood that I re- 
 quested protection, they afforded me every 
 assistance in their power. I had been 
 only a few moments there, when I heard 
 the alarm bell ringing at the Convent. 
 On looking out at the window, we saw 
 two of the porters searching in the canal 
 with long poles. After searching some 
 time they returned to the Convent, and I 
 saw their dogs scenting my course. 
 
 While at that house I looked in a glass, 
 and was surprised, nay, frightened, at my 
 own figure, it was so pale and ema- 
 ciated* 
 
 Notwithstanding my wrist being sprain- 
 ed, I wrote a few lines to Mrs. G., whom 
 I still supposed my friend, begging her to 
 come to my relief, for I did not wish my 
 father and sisters to see me in my present 
 condition. I thanked God that he had 
 inclined his ear unto me, and delivered 
 me out of the hands of the wicked. But 
 
 • It will be perceived that this does not correspond with what 
 the Superior told my sister. 
 
176 SIX MONTHS 
 
 here was not an end of my afflictions. 
 Mrs. G. came in the evening to convey 
 me to her house. She would not allow 
 me to say any thing about my escape at 
 Mr. K.'s, and wished me to return to the 
 Convent that night. I resolved not to go. 
 After whispering a long time to me about 
 the importance of secrecy, she left Mr. 
 K.'s, as we supposed, for home ; but she 
 soon returned, saying she at first in- 
 tended to leave me at Mr. K.'s, but had 
 concluded to take me home with her, as 
 she desired some further conversation. 
 Her manners appeared very strange, yet 
 I did not distrust her friendship. Before 
 leaving Mr. K.'s, she requested me to 
 obtain from them a promise not to say 
 any thing about my escape, which I 
 did. 
 
 After I arrived at Mrs. G.'s, I showed 
 her my wounds, and my feet, which had 
 been frozen, and told her I did not find 
 the Convent what I had expected. She 
 seemed to sympathize with me, and to do 
 
IN A CONVENT. 177 
 
 all in her power for my recovery. She 
 did not then urge me to say much, as I 
 was quite weak. 
 
 The next morning, the Convent boy on 
 horseback came galloping up to the house, 
 and delivered to Mrs. G. a letter from the 
 Superior, and was very particular, as he 
 said he had orders not to give it to any one 
 except to her. She refused to tell me its 
 contents, and sent directly for a chaise, to 
 go to the Convent. She took with her the 
 religious garb I had worn on my head, 
 and the book containing Miss Mary 
 Francis' name* Meanwhile I endeavored 
 to com pose myself, and wrote to Miss Mary 
 Francis, agreeably to my promise, inform- 
 ing her of my afflictions, and of my re- 
 luctance to return to the bustle of the 
 world. I proposed to her some questions, 
 and requested her advice. 1 wrote that I 
 could not think otherwise than that the 
 
 • This book I brought awaj- because Mary Francis had pricked 
 hers and her father's real name out in it, and I wished to refer to 
 it, in order to write her. I took it from my writing desk, and 
 slipped it into my pocket. 
 
178 SIX MONTHS 
 
 Superior and Bishop were very wicked. 
 I did not write much, thinking her con- 
 fessor might advise her not to answer it, 
 as it was probable that the Superior would 
 write to him; and I was anxious to con- 
 vince Mrs. G. that Mary Francis thought 
 as I did, for Mrs. G. would not permit me 
 to say one word against the Superior or 
 Bishop; and I was resolved to ascertain if 
 Mary Francis was living and happy. 
 When Mrs. G. returned from the Convent 
 she sa ; i the Superior had too exalted an 
 opinion of me to think I would say any 
 thing against the institution, and she had 
 sent me a present, as she still considered 
 me one of her flock ; and if I had gone 
 astray, she should do every thing she 
 could for me, in a temporal as well as in 
 a spiritual sense, if I would repent. My 
 words were just these: " I cannot receive 
 any present from the Superior ; she is a 
 wicked woman, and I do not believe her 
 friendship pure." At this moment Priest 
 B. drove to the door, and desired to see me. 
 I did not think myself in danger, and 
 
IN A CONVENT. 179 
 
 conversed with him ; but I soon found that 
 he had seen the Superior and Bishop. He 
 said that as he was my sponsor he con- 
 sidered it his duty to advise me, and hoped 
 I was not going to break my vows to God 
 and expose myself to the world ; because, 
 if I did, I should be ridiculed and laughed 
 at. He said he had before conveyed a 
 Novice to the " Sisters of Charity," and 
 would convey me to them, or to some 
 other retired place which I might choose, 
 and that he was deeply concerned for my 
 welfare. I told him I could not think of 
 going anywhere then, as my health would 
 not allow any exposure to the cold, and 
 that Mrs. G. thought it best I should re- 
 main with her until I was better, when I 
 should visit my father. He then exclaim- 
 ed, "What letter is this?" taking up and 
 reading the one I had written to Mary 
 Francis. After reading it, he appeared 
 surprised, and desired to know how I 
 came in possession of her name. He 
 said he should have seen me at the Con- 
 vent had he known I was discontented; 
 
180 SIX MONTHS 
 
 and that if the Superior had done wrong, 
 it was no reason I should do so, by 
 speaking against the Convent or those 
 connected with it. He then shook hands 
 with me, and said he would converse 
 with me again when I was more com- 
 posed, and left the house. 
 
 I soon began to suspect by Mrs. G.'s 
 manners that she was not my friend, and 
 that if she had an opportunity she would 
 deliver me into the hands of the Catho- 
 lics ; for I learned from her little daughter 
 that her mother had given her to the 
 Catholic Church, because the Superior 
 had ofTered to educate her, free of ex- 
 pense: and that her mother was acquaint- 
 ed with the Superior before I went to the 
 Convent. Now this I did not know be- 
 fore, and I began to be more guarded, and 
 to fear that all belonging to the Romish 
 Church were alike. When I gave Mrs. 
 G. the letter to send to the post-office, she 
 asked if I was afraid she would break it 
 open ; and at another time afterwards, she 
 told me I was afraid she would poison me 
 
IN A CONVENT. 181 
 
 because I refused to take medicine, which 
 I thought I did not need. Such thoughts 
 did not occur to my mind. 
 
 In a day or two Priest B. again came, 
 and after much persuasion from J.Irs. G. 
 I consented to see him. At first he ap- 
 peared very pleasant, said he had come to 
 render me assistance, and begged, as I 
 valued my religion and reputation, to take 
 his advice. I told him that I wished none 
 of his assistance or advice; that I should 
 goto my brother's, at East Cambridge, as 
 soon as possible ; that as it respected my 
 religion, I did not believe in one which 
 justified its followers in doing wrong; and 
 that I was not at all concerned that my 
 reputation would be injured on that ac- 
 count by returning to the world. He 
 affected considerable contempt for my 
 aged parent, and ridiculed many things 
 which he said he had heard of my father. 
 And he said,*- " Is it possible that a young 
 lady wishes to have her name made pub- 
 
 * He informed me I should be anathematized publicly if I did 
 not repent. 
 
182 is.X MONTHS 
 
 lie ?" I answered, " You very well know 
 I should shrink from such a thing, but I 
 should rather return to the world and ex- 
 pose myself to its scorn, than remain sub- 
 ject to the commands of a tyrant." 
 " Then," said he, " if you are determined 
 to return to the world, you may go to ru- 
 in there for all I can do; and rely upon it, 
 you will shed tears of blood in conse- 
 quence of the step you have taken, if you 
 do not repent and confess all at the secret 
 tribunal of God." I told him I should 
 confess to none but God, and that my 
 conscience prompted me to do as I had 
 done. He asked me if I would go with 
 him to the Superior, as she wanted to see 
 me. I replied, ;i No, I will not, for I be- 
 lieve you or any other Catholic would (if 
 directed) tike my life, were it in your pow- 
 er, as truly as I believe I am living, and ] 
 will not trust myself in your clutches 
 again." x\t these words he turned pale, 
 and asked me what I had seen or heard at 
 the Convent that made me think so. I 
 r^fu^M to sav nmrp. and retired at his 
 
IN A CONVENT. 183 
 
 exclamation that it would be death to me. 
 Mrs. G. endeavored to console me with 
 the assurance that he meant right, and 
 that it would, they feared, be death to my 
 soul. 
 
 Mrs. G. afterwards accused me of endea- 
 voriug, at the time of my escape, to induce 
 Sister Bernard to leave the Convent. The 
 Superior sent me some articles of wearing 
 apparel, which for z. time I was obliged 
 to accept. My sister called; she had been 
 at the Convent, and was informed that I 
 was at Mrs. G.'s. She was overjoyed to 
 see me, but much grieved because (as 
 she thought) I had refused to see her 
 at the Convent. I endeavored to calm 
 her, and promised to explain all another 
 time, assuring her my affection was not 
 diminished, and that I should soon visit 
 her. I did not then explain to her the 
 manner of my leaving the Convent. It 
 being late in the evening, she soon re- 
 turned home. The Misses K. also called, 
 and by their conversation I feared they 
 would inform my father of my situation, 
 
184 SIX MONTHS 
 
 before I should be well and prepared to 
 see him; and I did not wish to grieve him 
 with a knowledge of what had taken 
 place. Mrs. G. said she expected my 
 father would rave at her for having ad- 
 vised me as she had done, if he should 
 find me at her house. 
 
 A Catholic lady, who had stood my 
 sponsor, and who brought a letter from 
 Mary Francis,^ called, and conveyed me 
 to her house in Charlestown, where my 
 father and brother soon found me, and de 
 sired I would return to my friends, which 
 I did in the evening. Before leaving, 
 however, I called on Priest B., and told 
 him that I could never think of again 
 attending the Romish Church, giving my 
 reasons, and adding that I had been de- 
 ceived in their religion, and in those who 
 believed it; that I wished to take my 
 leave of him, with the hope that he 
 would not think I indulged any wrong 
 feelings towards them, or that I desired to 
 
 • This letter had been broken open. 
 
IN A CONVENT. 185 
 
 injure the Romish Church, but sincerely- 
 hoped they would reform. I told him this 
 while he sat in the confessional. He re- 
 mained unmoved, and would not allow 
 that I had been treated ill. He said that 
 I could not but know that the step I had 
 taken would be a great injury to the 
 Convent. I assured him that it was not 
 to be charged to me, but to the Superior 
 and Bishop, who by their conduct had 
 compelled me to take that step. I also 
 told him that I believed it had been his 
 intention to deliver me again into their 
 hands, but I had broken the chains which 
 bound me, and felt free; and that I should 
 always be thankful that I had delivered 
 myself from the bondage of what I should 
 consider to be a Romish yoke, rather than 
 the true cross of Christ. 
 
 After 1 had returned to my brother's, 
 Mrs. G. sent to me by her little daughter 
 some money, which she said I had given 
 to the Superior. Five dollars of this sum 
 and some wearing apparel I considered as 
 8* 
 
186 SIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT. 
 
 not my own, and sent them back with a 
 note to Madam St. George, stating that I 
 declined receiving any thing from them as 
 presents, but if they would return what 
 wearing apparel, &c. belonged to me, it 
 would be properly acknowledged. 
 
 And now I have endeavored, to the ex- 
 tent of my ability, to give a true and 
 faithful account of what fell under my 
 observation during my sojourn among the 
 Catholics, and especially during my resi- 
 dence at the Monastery on Mount Bene- 
 dict. And I leave it with the reader to 
 judge of my motives for becoming a mem- 
 ber of the Ursuline Community, and for 
 renouncing it. 
 
 If, in consequence of my having for a 
 time strayed from the true religion, I am 
 enabled to become an humble instrument 
 "in the hands of God in warning others of 
 the errors of Romanism, and preventing 
 even one from falling into its snares, and 
 from being shrouded in its delusions, I 
 shall feel richly rewarded. 
 
LETTER TO IRISH CATHOLICS. 
 
 {condensed from a boston paper.] 
 
 I am told that it will be of no use to write letters to you, be- 
 cause so mar»y of you cannot read. But there, are also many of 
 you who can read. I write to them ,• and I hope they will read my 
 letters to the rest. 
 
 But why have you not been taught to read? You and your 
 forefathers have had Roman Catholic Priests for a thousand yeara. 
 What have they beep, doing ? Why have they not taught you, or 
 taken #are to have you taught by others ? What have they dona 
 with all the money which you and your fathers have paid them ? 
 They have built splendid churches at Rome, and bought rich dresses 
 for the Pope and Cardinals to wear, and gilded coaches for them 
 to ride in. They have built, and are building, expensive colleges 
 and schools, to instruct the children of rich Protestants, hoping to 
 make Catholic Priests of them. Meanwhile, your children, and 
 your father's children, and your grandfather's children, and your 
 ether ancestors, have been left to get a little learning as you could, 
 or grow up in ignorance. 
 
 Is not this all true ? Only think how much money you have 
 paid them yourselves. Do you know what they have done with 
 it ? When a Protestant has given a man a dollar for some re- 
 ligious purpose, he must show what he has done with it, or he will 
 never get another. Is it so with you ? Do you know what your 
 Priests do with all the money they receive from you? Have not 
 you and your Catholic neighbors paid Vl 'em so much, that they 
 might have taught you, and your neighbor,, and your children, to 
 read ? If you and your ancestors, for five hundred years past, 
 or two hundred years past, had been Protestant you would have 
 been taught. 
 
 Now, my friends, think, a little while, whether PrWs who have 
 so shamefully neglected their duty are worthy of your Oafidence. 
 You and your fathers have tried them for hundreds en' years. 
 Have you not tried them long enough? Is it not time for you to 
 
188 LETTER TO, 
 
 say your children shall be taught to read ? Is it not time for you 
 to choose such schools for them as you find to be best 1 This is a 
 free country. The Priests have no right to control you in the edu- 
 cation of your children. 
 
 Some of you do send your children to our public schools. The 
 teachers tell me that they behave as well, and learn as fast, as 
 any children under their care. I am glad to hear it. Your 
 children, thus educated, will be intelligent and respectable. Some 
 of them will be among our great men in another generation. If 
 the Priests will furnish schools for your children which are as good 
 as the public schools, you have a perfect right to send your 
 children to which you please. But see to it that they go to good 
 schools, — schools where they learn well. If you are determined 
 to send them to such schools, probably the Priests will not object, 
 for they know they cannot help themselves. Perhaps they will 
 even encourage you. But whether they do or not, see to it that 
 yotr children are well educated. 
 
 Your Priests tell you, that the Roman Catholic Church is infalli- 
 ble. Suppose it is so. How do you know what that church 
 teaches ? Some three weeks ago a part of the doings of the Council 
 of Trent, sanctioned by the Pope's Bull, were published. It w,n 
 copied from a book published by Roman Catholics, and sanctioned 
 by the Roman Catholic authorities in church and state. Yet the 
 Catholic Sentinel calls it a " Protestant slander." Now, if such 
 documents, so published, are not tote depended upon, how are we 
 to know, or how can you know, what the Roman Catholic Church 
 really teaches ? Especially, how do those of you who cannot read 
 know what the church teaches ? 
 
 Do you say, that your Priests tell you what the church teaches 7 
 How do you know that they tell you truly ? How do you know 
 that they do not deceive you ? How do you know that the PriesU 
 themselves know what the doctrines of the church are 1 Do you 
 believe that every Priest is infallible ? Martin Luther was once 
 a Roman Catholic Priest. Was he infallible? Caivin, too, was 
 once a Roman Catholic Priest. Was he infallible ? Mr. Samuel 
 B. Smith, who is now publishing a newspaper, called '' The 
 Downfall of Babylon," was a Roman Catholic Priest only some 
 two years ago. Was he infallible ? If they were infallible, then 
 they did right to leave the Roman Catholic Church. 
 
 But you may be told, that these men were apostates — they left 
 %he church, and became Protestants. True, they became Protes- 
 tants. But if th«\ Roman Catholic Church had been right, and they 
 when Priests had been infallible, they could not have left it. And 
 then, think of Archbishop Fenelon. He did not leave the church. 
 Yet he published a book, which the Pope condemned, and he con- 
 fessed that it contained erroneous doctrines. Was ho infallible 
 when he wrote that book? And was the Pope infallible \r*wn be 
 condemned it ? And was Fenelon still infallible when Yt * *• ««i 
 »he Pope in condemning it 1 
 
R^SH CATHOLICS. 189 
 
 No, your Priests are not infallible. They may mistake. How 
 do you know that those of them who teach you do not mistake ? 
 How do you know that what they teach is the true doctrine of 
 the church ? How can you know, unless you read the Bible for 
 yourselves, and find that the Bible teaches the same doctrines ? 
 
 Do your Priests ever tell you to pray to the Virgin Mary, the 
 mother of our Lord Jesus Christ ? I suppose they do. You know 
 whether they tell you so or not. How do you know that this is a 
 doctrine of the true Catholic Church ? Do you say, that all Catho- 
 lics practise it ? You mean, all Catholics with whom you are 
 acquainted. Perhaps there are other Catholics who do not pray 
 to her. How do you know ? Do your Priests tell you ? How do 
 your Priests know ? And how do you know that they tell the 
 truth ? 
 
 I suppose that all Roman Catholics do pray to the Virgin Mary ; 
 though I do not see how either you or I can know it infallibly. But 
 I suppose that you pray to her here in Boston, and some of your 
 friends pray to her in New York, and others in Pennsylvania, and 
 others in Ohio, and others in Ireland, all at once. Now stop and 
 think for a moment ; — can she hear you all at once ? When you 
 pray to God, he can hear you, because he is an infinite Spirit, and 
 is everywhere at the same time ; but Mary is not God. She is 
 not everywhere at the same time. She cannot listen at once to 
 a million of people, some here, and some three thousand, and some 
 ten thousand miles off. When several people speak to you at 
 once, you cannot listen to them all, and understand them all. And 
 do you believe that Mary can listen to a million, who are all speak- 
 ing at once, in different parts of the world, so as to know what they 
 all say ? Do you say the infallible church teaches that she can hear 
 them all ? How do you know that the church teaches it ? How do 
 you know that your Priests tell the truth when they say the church 
 teaches it? And how do you know that the church is infallible 1 
 You have only the word of the Priests for it, and perhaps they mis- 
 take. And if the true church is infallible, how do you know that the 
 Church of Rome is the true church ? The Priests tell you so ; but 
 they may be wrong. And besides, do you not see that Mary 
 cannot listen to a million of prayers at once, so as to understand 
 them all ? Do you not see that this must be an error ? Do you 
 not see that, if the Church of Rome teaches this, it teaches what is 
 not true ? 
 
 If your Priests teach you to pray to Mary, they teach you 
 wrong. God says, that " whoever shall call upon the name of the 
 Lord shall be saved." Romans x. 13. He does not say that who- 
 ever shall call on the name of Mary shall be saved. God teaches 
 one thing, and your Priests teach another. 
 
 I must say a few words to you about images. In the second of 
 the ten commandments, God says, " Thou shalt not bow down 
 unto them." Do you bow down unto them? If you do, you 
 
190 LETTER TO 
 
 • 
 
 disobey God. If your Priests teach you to bow down unto them, 
 they teach you to break God's commandment. 
 
 I could quote to you what Roman Catholic councils have de- 
 creed, and what Popes have said on this subject; for I can read 
 Latin as well as your Priests. But when I quote what Popes and 
 councils say, the Sentinel calls it " ProtestaDt slander." Your 
 infallible church has no infallible books, in which any one can infal- 
 libly learn its doctrines ; at least, I cannot find any, which your 
 Priests and editors will allow to be infallible. But no matter. I 
 am writing to you, and you know whether they teach you to bow 
 down to images or not. If they do, they teach you to do wickedly ; 
 and if you follow such teaching, you offend God. 
 
 Perhaps the Priests will tell you, that you do not worship the 
 image, but only worship God by means, of the image. But take 
 notice, God says, " Thou shalt not bow down unto them." Now, 
 suppose you bow down unto an image for the purpose of worship- 
 ping God ; still you break God's commandment ; for he says, " Thou 
 shalt not bow down unto them." When God tells you that you 
 must not do a thing, lie never sends Priests to tell you that you 
 must do it. If any Priest tells you to bow down before an image, 
 you must know by that that God did not send him. I have been 
 told that Bishop Cheverus some years ago said, in one of his ser- 
 mons, that you must have images, because you are so ignorant that 
 you cannot worship without them ; and I have read the words of 
 soma Popes and Bishops who speak in the same way. But is this 
 true ? Did not God know whether you ought to have images or 
 not. when he said, " Thou shait not bow down unto them ?" 
 
 But can you not think of God when you do not see an image ? 
 You know that you can. You can remember how kind he has 
 been to you, in preserving your lives; in giving you food to eat, 
 and raiment to put on ; and in giving his Son to die for you, that 
 your sins may be pardoned. You can feel thankful to him for all 
 his goodness. You can say, heartily, "O God, I thank thee for 
 all thy goodness to me." You can wish him to continue to take 
 care of you, and supply your wants, and forgive your sins, and 
 help you to keep his commandments. You can think of God, and 
 ask him to do all these things, without having an image to look at. 
 You know you can. Do it, and that will be worshipping God 
 without the use of an image. You know you can do it. 'You are 
 not such great dunces as your Priests and Bishops pretend to think 
 you are. You can worship God without an image ; and you can 
 learn to worship him still better than you now can. 
 
 Pe.aaps some of your Priests will tell you, that God has given 
 no sucn commandment in respect to images. In some of their 
 books, in which they pretend to give the whole of the ten com- 
 mandments, th a y have left out the second, and divided the tenth 
 into two, so as to make out the number. When the Protestants 
 fgund it out, and told the public of it, the Priests had other editions 
 of the same books published, with all the commandments in them, 
 
RISH CATHOLICS. 191 
 
 S3 they should be. These they show, to prove that the story about 
 their leaving out the second commandment is a " Protestant 
 slander." Books of both kinds are still in circulation. I do not 
 know which you have, or which your Catholic neighbors have. I 
 mention it, that you may not be deceived if you happen to have 
 one of the false books, or if you have a false Priest, who tells you 
 there is no such commandment. 
 
 Think seriously of these things. Pwemember God's command- 
 ment, which forbids you to bow down before images. Worship 
 him in your minds, by thinking of him and expressing your 
 thoughts. Speak to him. Thank him for his goodness, and ask 
 him for what you need. He will understand you. If yon mean 
 honestly, he will know it, and will be pleased with your worship. 
 
 You know whether your Priests tell you any thing about pur- 
 gatory. You know whether you ever gave them any money to 
 pray, or say mass, for the souls of your friends, who, you sup- 
 posed, might be in purgatory. You know whether you ever gave 
 them any money to pray or say mass for your own souls, when 
 you are dead. You know, too, whether they ever told you to give 
 money for such purposes. You know about these things. I do 
 not ; but I suppose they teach you that there is such a place as 
 purgatory. 
 
 Now, how do they know that there is any such place? How 
 did they find it out ? There is not one word about it in the whole 
 Bible. God, in the Bible, has not told them that there is any such 
 place. How, then, do they know that there is any purgatory ? 
 Do they say, the church has decided it? How do you know thai 
 the church has decided it? How do you know that it was not 
 some false Pope, or some wicked, heretical council, that made 
 that decision ? Do the Priests tell you J The Priests are not in- 
 fallible. Perhaps they misinke. But if the church did make 
 such a decision, how did the church know ? God did not tell them. 
 We have all Gad's word in the Bible, and it says not one word about 
 purgatory. 
 
 How, then, do the Prieets know that there is a purgatory ? Have 
 any of them ever been there ? No. Did they ever see any body 
 that had been there ? I think they will not pretend that they have. 
 The truth is, that there Is no such place. 
 
 Do you ask me why they tell such a story ? You have a better 
 opportunity to know than 1 have. You know whether they get 
 any of your money by telling it. If they do, it may be that they 
 tell it for the sake of getting your money. What would you think 
 of any body else who should get away your money by telling you 
 what is not true ? 
 
 I do not mean to say that all your Priests know that there is no 
 such place as purgatory. Perhaps some of them believe it; for 
 some of them are very ignorant. After all the noise ihey make 
 about their learning, some of them have only a littte Latin, which 
 they have learned by heart without understanding it, and cannot 
 
192 LETTER, &C 
 
 read a word of Greek or Hebrew. But if such ignorant Priests 
 do believe it, that does not make it true. Our Savior tells you not 
 to follow such blind guides, lest you both fall into the ditch. 
 
 Perhaps you say you are a sinner, and unfit for heaven ; and 
 ask what you shall do, if there is no purgatory, where you can 
 suffer what yeu deserve, unless the Priest procures your release 
 by saying mass for you. I will tell you. Go into your closet. Go 
 into any place where you can be alone. There think of Christ. 
 Remember the words of the holy Apostle, written in the Holy 
 Scriptures, " the blood of Christ cleanseth from all sin." Think 
 of Christ, who died for your sins. Believe that God is there, and 
 can hear you. Think of your sins. Confess them, honestly, to 
 God. Ask him to forgive you, for Christ's sake. Do not pray to 
 Mary, or some other Saint. Do not ask any of them to intercede 
 with God for you. Speak to God yourself. Tell him that you arc 
 a sinner. Tell him all the truth about yourself. Ask him to 
 forgive your sins. Believe that he is ready and willing to hear 
 your prayer, and to forgive your sins, for the sake of his Son, who 
 died to redeem you. If you "really feel sorry that you have sinned, 
 and truly wish to serve God hereafter, he will accept and pardon 
 you. Do not be afraid to speak to your heavenly Father. He 
 loved you so much as to give his Son to die for you ; and will he 
 not be pleased to hear your prayer and forgive your sins ? Cer- 
 tainly he will. Go to him. Confess your sins to him. Ask par- 
 don of him. He will forgive you. He will give you his Spirit, to 
 lead you in the right way. When you die, he will not send you 
 to hell, for you are pardoned ; nor to purgatory, for there is no such 
 place ; but will take you to heaven at once. 
 
LIBRARY OF CONGRESS 
 
 
 014 069 529 4