Frenches International Copyrighted (in Engfland, her Colonies, and the United States) Edition of the Works of the Best Authors. t No. IJ5 I s THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL ««^ * • . — - "S Copyright, 1907, by Samuel French '90 <* ^^ 4t> •♦• ve'« Sacrifice 13 The Ganietler 14 A Cure for the Heartache 1.', Tlie H.iiichback 16 Dou Cifsar de Baian VOL. 111. 1" The Poor (jentleman 18 Hamlet lit Charles It JO VenicK I'reierved t\ Piiarro 82 Tlie Love Chase n Othello 24 Lrud me Five Shillings VOL. IV. 85 Virginiin 26 King of ihe Commons 51 London Assurance S8 The Rent Day 29 TwoGentleni^ii ofVerouR 80 The Jealous Wife 31 The Rivals 82 Perfection VOL. V. [Debt R8 A New Way to Pay Uid 84 Look Before You Leap 36 King John 86 Nervous Man 81 Damon and Pythlaa 88 Clandestine Marriage 8« William Tell 40 Day after the Wedding VOL. VI. 41 Speed the Plough 42 Romeo and Juliet 43 Feudal Times 44 Charles the Twelfth 45 The Bride 46 The Follies of a Night 47 Iron Chest IFair Lady Never Won VOL. XL 81 Julius C«»ar 8J Vicar of Wakefield S'-i Leap Year 84 The Cat^naw 86 The Passing Cloud 86 Drunkard 87 Rob Roy 88 George Barnwell VOL. XH. 89 Ingomar 90 Sketches in India 91 Two Friends 9 Jane Shore 93 Corsican Brothers s»4 Mind your own Business 9.^ Writing on the Wall 96 Heir at Lavr VOL. XIIL 97 Soldier's Daughter 9- Dougla* 99 Marco Spada 1(1(1 Nature's Nobleman 101 Sardanapalus 10'.' Civilization l(l.S The Robbers 104 Katharine and Petruchio VOL. XIV. 105 Game of Love 106 Midsummer Night ,(17 Ernestine [Dream 108 Rag l^icker of Paris 109 flying Duichiiiau 1 10 Hypocrite 111 There?e 1 12 La Tour de Nesle VOL. XV. 113 Ireland As It Is 114 Sea of Ice 115 Seven ClerVs 116 Game ofl.ife 117 Forty Thirves 118 Bryan Boroihme 119 Roniaiue and Reality liO Ugolit.o VOL. xvr. n The Trnipest liJi The Pilot 123 Carpenter of Rouen 1 4 King's Rival 125 Little Treasure 126 Donibey and Son 12" Parent* and Guardians \ii Jewess VOL. XVII. 129 Camille 130 Married Life 131 Wenlock of Wenlock 132 Rose of Etirickvale 133 David CopperHeld 134 Aline, or the Rose of Pauline ^Killarney 136 Jane Eyre VOL. XVTU. .37 Night and Morning 38 .Ethiop .<9 Three Guardsmen 140 Tom Cringle 141 lUnriette, the Forsaken 42 Eustache Baudin 13 Ernest Maltravers 144 Bold Dragoons VOL. XIX. 145 Dred, or the Dismal [Swamp 146 Last Days of Pompeii 117 Esmeralda 148 I'eter \Vil«ins 149 Ben the Boitswaln 150 Jonathan Bradford 151 Retribution 163 Minerali VOL. XX. riage 48 Faint Heart VOL. VH. 49 Road to Ruhj to Macbeth 61 Temper ti Evadn* 63 Bertram 64 The Du'nna 65 Much A Phantom 66 Kranlilin [Moscow 67 The Gunmaker of ISSThe Love Ota Prince VOL. XXll. 69 Son of the Night 70RorvO'.More 171 (iolden Eagle 172 Rieiii/ 173 Broken Sword 74 Rip Van Winkle 75 Isabel le 176 Heart of Mid Lothian VOL. XXIII. 177 Actress of Padua 178 Floating Beacon 179 Bride of Lammermoor 180 Cataract of the Ganges IHl Robber of the Rhine 182 School ol Reform 18:1 Wandering Boys 184 Mazeppa VOL. XXIV. 185 Young New York ls6The Victims 187 Romance after Ma 188 Biigajid 189 Poor of New York 190 Ambrose Gwiiiett 191 Raymond aiMl Agnes I9» Gaiiibler's Fate VOL. XXV. 193K'ither and Son 194 M issaniello 195 Sixteen Siring Jack 196 Youth inl Queen 197 Skeleton Witne.^s 198 Innkeeper of Abbeville 199 Miller and his Men 200 Aladdin VOL. xxvr. 201 Adrienne the Actress •2(iJ Undine 2(13 Jesse Brown 204 Asinodeus -.'05 Mormons 2Ufi Blanche of Brandywine 2(17 Viola 208 Deseret Deserted VOL. XXVll. 09 Americans in Paris 21(1 Victorine Wizard of the Wave 212 Castle Spectre 213 Horse-shoe Robinson Armand, Mrs. Mowatt 21-1 Fashion, Mrs. Mowatt 216 Glance at New York VOL. XXVHl. 217 Inconstant 218 Uncle Tom's Cabin 219 lyiiide to the Stage 220 Veteran Miller of New Jersey 222 Dark Hour l»efore Dayvn 223 Midsum'rNight'sDream [Liiura Keene's Edition 224 Art and Artifice •VOL. XXIX. 2^ Po<* Young Man »6^sslwattomie Brown 227 E.«i« of Rome 2»!8fc)liver Twist 229 Pauvrette 230 Man in the Iron Mask 231 Knight of Arva 232 Moll Pitcher VOL. XXX. 288 Black Eyeil Susan ■J'M Satan in Paris 235 Rosina Meadows 23t; West End, or Irish Hei 237 Six Degrees of Crime 238 The Lady and the Devil 239 Aveni;er', or Moor of Sici- 240 Masks and Faces [ly [ess VOL. XXXI. 241 Merry Wives of Windsor 242 Mary's Birthday 243 Shandy Maguir* 244 Wild Oats 24.1 Michael Erie 246 Idiot Witness 247 Willow Copse 248 People's Lawyer VOL. xxkii. 249 The Boy Martyrs 250 Lucretia Borgia 251 Surgeon of Paris 252 Patrician's D,<\ughter 253 Shoemaker of Tonlous* 254 Momentous Qoestioa 255 Love and I^oyalty 256 Robber's Wife VOL xxxin. 257 Dumb Girl of Genoa Wreck Ashore 259 Clari 260 Rural Felicity 261 Wallace 262 Madelaine 263 The Fireman 264 Grist to the Mill VOL. XXXIV. 265 Two Loves and a Life 266 Annie Blake 267 Steward 268 Captain Kyd 269 Ni.k of the Wood* 2T0 Marble Heart 271 Second Love 272 Dream at Sea Vol. XXXV. Breach of Promise 274 Review 275 Lidvof theLake 276 Stilf Water Runs Deep 277 The Scholar 278 Helping Hands 279 Faust and Marguerite 280 Last Miin VOL. XXXVT. 281 Belle's Stratagem 2i>2 Old and Young 283 Raffaella 284 Ruth Oakley 285 British .Slf ve 2'»6 A Life's Xansom 287 Giralda Time Tries All VOL. XXXVIL Ella Rosenburg 290 Warlock of the Glea ?91 Zelina 292 Beatrice 293 Neighbor Jack wood 294 Wonder 95 Robert Emmet 296 (ireen Bu»hes VOL. XXXVllL Flowers of the Forest 298 A Bachelor of Arts 299 The Midnitcht Banquet .300 Husband of in Hour 301 Love'sM.abor Lost 302 Naiad Queen ?(I3 Caprice 304 Cradle of Liberty VOL. XX XIX. .305 The Lost Ship 306 Country Squire 307 Fraud and its Victims 308 Putnam 309 King and Deserter 310 La Fiammina 31 1 A Hard Struggle 312 Gwinnette Vaughan VOL. XL. 313 The Love Knot [Judge 314 Lavater, or Not a Bad 315 The Noble Heart 316 Coriolanus 317 The Winter's Tale 318 Kveleen Wilson 319 Ivanhoe 320 Jonathan lu Eugland SAMUEL FRENCH, a6 West aad Street, f^ew York City. New and Explicit Descriptive Catalosfue inailed Free on Request. THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL H Comebig In jfour Hcts BY ST. JOHN HANKIN AUTHOR OF "THE TWO MR. WETHERBYS " "THE CHARITY THAT BEGAN AT HOME," "THE CASSILIS ENGAGEMENT" Copyright, 1907, by Samuel French Caution: — Professionals and Amateurs are hereby notified that this play is fully copyrighted under the existing laws of the United States Government, and nobody is allowed to do this play without first having obtained written permission of Samuel French, 24 West 22d St., New York City, U.S.A. New York SAMUEL FRENCH publisher 24 WEST 22D STREET London SAMUEL FRENCH, Ltd. 26 Southampton St. STRAND LtttRARYufCOf^GBFsVf I wo GoDies ftweivcxj l OCT 24 i90/ Copyrirtf Entry Casf of the Original Production at the Royal Court Theatre, London, on September 25, 1905. Samuel Jackson Mr. J. H. Barnes. Mrs. Jackson Miss Florence Hay don. Henry Mr. Dennis Eadie. Eustace Mr. A. E. Matthews. Violet ; Miss Amy Lamborn. Sir John Farinqford Mr. Artluir Applin. Lady Faringford Miss Hilda Rivers. Stella Faringford Miss Hazel Thompson. Dr. Glaisher Mr. F. W. Permain. The Rev. Cyril Pratt Mr. Norman Page. Mrs. Pratt Miss Agnes Thomas. Baines Mr. Edmund Gwenn. THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL Scenes, ACT I. The drawing- room at Chedleigh. ACT II. Tlie breakfast-room at Chedleigh. ACT III. The lawn at Chedleigh. ACT IV. Same as Act I. persons of tbe (^ome^l?. Samuel Jackson Of Jackson, •Hartopp and Jackson, cloth-makers. A pompous man of 55. Maria His wife, fat, comfortable woman of 53. Henry .Their eldest son, partner in the Firm, 31. Eustace Their second son. The Ne'er- do-well, 29. Violet Their daughter, 28. Sir John Faringford, Bart.. A local magnate, 48. Lady Faringford His wife, 46. Stella Faringford .Their daugliter, 19. Dr. Glaisher The local medical man, 44. The Rev. Cyril Pratt The Rector, 60. Mrs. Pratt His wife, 54. Baines . Butler at the Jacksons'. Two Footmen. The action of the play takes place at Chedleigh Court, the Jacksons' house in Gloucestershire. Chedleigh, as everybody knows, has long been famous for its cloth mills. properties* ACT I. Baize. Carpet. 2 pair blue silk curtains. 6 skin rugs. Wliite mantelpiece. Gold overmantel. 2 blue and white china jar8. 2 silver candelabra. 1 gold Louis clock. 6 feet Chesterfield. Tapestry cushion. Bureau. 1 small square occasional table. 1 oblong inlaid occasional table. Grand piano. Stool for same. Revolving bookcase. Louis XV 4 -fold gilt screen. 3 gilt armchairs. 1 ordinary chair. Plants for fireplace. Palms for front of piano. Music sheets (on revolving bookcase). Fender and fire-irons. Electric light warning on piano. Red book (on bureau). Knitting in work-basket (on bureau). Silk handkerchief. Globe newspaper. 1 footman's tray with 5 coffee cups, saucers and spoons. 1 butler's tray with sugar basin and tongs, milk and cream jugs. , , • ^„ 1 salver with tantalus containing brandy, glass jug con- taining water and tumbler. Smelling salts bottle. PROPERTIES. 5 ACT II. Carpet, 1 pair Oriental curtains. Rugs, large oval breakfast table. 1 tapestry cloth ; 1 white cloth, teapot, silver coffee-pot, milk jug, slop basin, sugar basin, 3 breakfast cups and saucers and spoons, o large knives and forks. 3 small knives, 3 large plates. 3 small plates. Extra plates on sideboard. Fruit dish, toast rack, filled ; entree dish for cover con- taining eggs and bacon for three. Box of cigarettes, Standard newspaper, letters. 2 cruets with spoons, 3 serviettes. Sideboard, 2 small bookcases. 1 rosewood overmantel. 1 brown fireplace. 1 workshelf. 2 armchairs, 3 ordinary chairs. Writing table with drawers. Stationery cabinet, blotting pad, music stand, large butler's tray with handles. 1 crumb brush and tray for footman having on it one entree dish with cover containing eggs and bacon. 1 large plaice, 1 toast rack, full ; 1 silver coffee-pot, 1 serviette. Red book as in Act Ic Pictures. Ornaments. Cook's list. Graphic for V. C. Serviette ring. Sideboard cover. ACT III. Wicker-work table. Hammock. 1 wicker armchair. 5 wicker chairs. 2 pairs blue silk curtains as in Act I, o THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. ACT I. Scene : — The Jacksons' Drawing-room, a handsome room, suggests opulence rather than taste. Not vulgar hut not distinguished. Too full of furni- ture, pictures, IcnicTcknaclcs, chair covers, plants in pots. Too full of everything. There is a door up L. from hall. Fireplace l. further down stage with rather elaborate overmantel of wood painted white. A sofa sticks out square from wall L. above fireplace. Between it and door is a screen with a piece of drapery sloping over it. Below fireplace and nearest to footlights one of those upright Dutch writing tables with a front which lets down fiat when you want to write. It is open. In the centre wall two windows, curtains drawn as it is evening. Between them against wall writing table with chair in front of it, bach to audience. Up R. grand piano, the keyboard being at the end furthest from footlights. A small table stands by the side of the piano at the point where the body Note. The Stage Directions throughout this play are given from the standpoint of the audience, r. meaning the Audience's Right, l. the Audience's Left. 7 8 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. narrows. On this and on the piano itself are large pots of plants in flower, photograph frames and other inappropriate things. Below piano, between it and footlights and therefore mainly screening the player from the audience, a palm or two in tall pots. Below this a settee holding two. There are also plants in the fireplace, as it is summer and that is the Jacksons' conception of the proper way to adorn a fireplace and a suit' able place for growing plants. Easy chairs all over the place. The room is lighted by electricity but when the curtain rises only a few of the lights are turned on. (When the curtain rises the stage is empty. Then door opeiis l. and enter Lady Faringford, her daughter Stella, Mrs. Pratt, Violet Jackson, and, after an interval, Mrs. Jackson.) Mrs. Jackson, {without, in her loud cheery voice) You won't stay too long over your cigars will you, Samuel? {Entering and coming down) I al- ways notice the gentlemen stay far too long in tlie dining-room unless they're specially told not to. Now Lady Faringf ord, where will you sit ? Try this sofa. Lady Faringford. {sitting in corner of sofa l. furthest from fireplace) Thank you. Mrs. Jackson. That's right. Mrs. Pratt, where shall I put you? No, don't go there. That's such a long way off. Come here. {Drags up arm chair near Lady Faringford with hospitable inelegance) . (Mrs. Pratt sits) Are you all right, Stella? THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 9 Stella, {who has taken place on settee r.) Quite thanks, Mrs. Jackson. Violet. Where will you go, mother? Mrs. Jackson. I'm going to sit here. Wait till I turn on some more light, (goes to door and does so) That's better ! (Mrs. Jackson takes seat hy Lady Faringford. Violet sits hy Stella and quietly begins to knit.) * Lady Faringford. I do envy you your electric light, Mrs. Jackson. Lamps are so troublesome. The servants are always setting themselves on fire with them. Mrs. Jackson, {comfortably) It is convenient, isn't it. Lady Faringford. How long have you had it? Mrs. Jackson. Only about eighteen months. We had it brought here at the same time that they were putting it in at the Mill. It seemed a pity not to as it was so close. And now I don't know what we should do without it. Mrs. Pratt. I saw it was all on at the Mill as we passed to-night. (Stella rises and goes up.) Mrs. Jackson. Yes. They can work much later now it's been put in. That was Henry's idea. It was almost impossible to work overtime profitably before on account of the light. Now the Mill often works night and day when there's a pressure. Stella. Surely the workmen must sleep some- times ? Mrs. Jackson. They have different sets of work- 10 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. men I believe. But you must ask Henry. He knows all about it. Lady Faringford. Mr. Jackson seems pretty cheerful about his election prospects. Mrs. Jackson. Yes. I do hope he'll get in. It will be such an amusement for him. (Stella at top table.) Mrs. Pratt. It would certainly be most regret- able if Mr. Ling were elected. He is a dissenter. The Rector says a clergyman should have no politics but I say a clergyman with no politics is never made a bishop. Lady Faringford. I trust the Rector will not allow Mr. Ling to use the Parish Room for any of his meetings. Mrs. Pratt. I'm afraid he will. He says he can't make distinctions between the two parties. If he lends the room to one he must lend it to the other. Lady Faringford. Then he had better lend it to neither. That will answer the purpose quite well. For Mr. Jackson can easily hire some place for his meetings while Mr. Ling cannot. It is such a com- fort that all the rich people about here are Conserva- tives. (Stella at table.) But I believe the same thing may be noticed in other parts of the country. It almost seems like a special Providence. Mrs. Jackson. I hope Sir John thinks my hus- band will get in? THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 11 Lady Faringford. Oh yes, I think so. It's un- fortunate that Mr. Ling is so popular. Only with quite vulgar people no doubt, Non-conformists and so forth. But even they have votes unfortunately. Still Mr. Jackson employs a large number of poople and they will vote for him of course— or what's the use of being an employer? And if he is sufficiently liberal with his subscriptions Mrs. Jackson. I believe my husband subscribes to everything. Lady Faringford. Then I'm sure he'll get in. It's a pity he won't have the Illingtons' support, by the way. (Enter Butler and Footman l. The footman first, carrying tray ivith five empty cups, then hutler with tray with coffee, cream and sugar.) They have a great deal of influence in their part of the county. Mrs. Pratt. (horrified) Surely Sir James hasn't turned Radical? Lady Faringford. No, no. Not so bad as that! But I hear he's quite ruined. His racing stable has cost him a fortune in the last few years and he's never won a single race. Braden will be to let in the autumn. Mrs. Jackson. Poor Sir James. He will feel parting with the place dreadfully. Lady Faringford. It's his own fault. He ought never to have made that absurd marriage. Mary Illington— she was Mary Tremayne, you know— one of the Wiltshire Tremaynes— hadn't a sixpence. 12 THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. What will become of that boy of theirs at Eton I can't think. They'll never be able to pay his school bills. Mrs. Jackson. Public schools are dreadfully ex- pensive, aren't they ? I remember when Eustace, my second boy, was at Harrow — Henry was never at a Public School — his bills were terribly high. Mrs. Pratt. I wonder whom we shall have at Braden. I do hope they will be Church people. The Scalebys, (Stella hj her mother.) who took Astley Park, play tennis on Sundays and seem to me to be little better than heathens. It sets such a bad example. Lady Faringford. The County is changing sadly. Half the old houses have changed hands and the new people are usually quite dreadful. If this sort of thing goes on there won't be a single person fit to speak to within twenty miles. (Pause.) Stella, (to Violet) What are you working at? Violet. A pair of socks for Old Allen. I always give him a pair for his birthday. That's about a month from now. Mrs. Pratt. I hope you and Mrs. Jackson have got a lot of things ready for the Mission Room Fund Bazaar, Violet? We want to clear off our debt and if possible have something in hand as well. Violet. Oh yes. I've done some things and so has mother. I'll send them up in a day or two. THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 13 Mrs. Pratt. And thank you so much, Lady Far- ingford, for the embroidered tea cloth you sent. It is sure to sell ! Lady Faringford. Let us hope so. It's extremely ugly. I bought it at the Kettlewell sale of work last year intending to give it to my poor sister Adelaide. But afterwards I hadn't the heart. So I sent it to your bazaar instead. (Pause.) Mrs. Jackson. Vi dear, won't you play us some- thing? Stella. Do Vi. We never have any music at the Hall now Fraulein Schmidt has gone. Violet. Very well if you'd really like it. (Violet moves to piano with Stella.) Lady Faringford. (to Mrs. Jackson) You remember her? She was Stella's governess. Quite an intelligent good creature. But I dare say you never met her. She never used to come down to dinner. (Violet begins to hunt through music.) Lady Faringford. I always think German gov- ernesses so much more satisfactory than English. You see there's never any question about having to treat them as ladies. And then they're always so plain. That's a great advantage. And German is such a useful language, far more useful for a young 14 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. girl than French. There are so many more books she can be allowed to read in it. French can be learnt later — and should be in my opinion. Mrs. Pratt. I quite agree with you Lady Faring- ford. But the Rector is less strict in these matters. He allowed my girls to begin French directly they went to school, at Miss Thursby's. But I'm bound to say they never seem to have learnt any. So per- haps it did no harm.. Mrs. Jackson. Yes, I have always heard Miss Thursby's was an excellent school. (Violet, having finished her search, puts a piece of music on piano and begins to play the second move- ments of Beethoven's twenty-seventh sonata.) (Enter Baines.) (She stops.) Baines. (going up to Mrs. Pratt) If you please. Madam, Simmonds is here asking if you could see him. They sent him on from the Rectory. Mrs. Pratt. Simmonds? Did he say his busi- ness? Baines. (coughs discreetly) Something about Mrs. Simmonds, I think, Madam. Mrs. Pratt. Of course. I remember. I will come in a moment. (rising) You'll excuse mo won't you, dear Mrs. Jackson ? It's Mrs. Simmonds. Foolish woman, she's had another baby. Her hus- band is in the hall. I shall probably have to run over to the Rectory for some things for her. THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 15 Mrs. Jackson, (rising at once) Oh no, you mustn't do that. I am sure we have everjthin<,' necessary here, soup and jelly and flannel and any- thing else you think wise. And of course they will want some money. I had hetter come and see Sim- monds with you. Then we can tell the housekeeper to put the things together for him. Mrs. Pratt. But it's giving you so much trouble. Mrs. Jackson. Not in the least. It's no trouble. And I can't have you running away and leaving us before the Rector has finished his cigar. That would never do. Violet, (rising) Can I do anything, mother? Mrs. Jackson. No dear. I can manage quite well. You stay here and entertain Lady Faringford and Stella. We sha'n't be five minutes. (Exeunt Mrs. Jackson and Mrs. Pratt shown out by Baines.) Violet, (coming down stage) Poor Mrs. Sim- monds. I do hope the baby will be all right. Lady Faringford. I have no doubt it will. When people have far more children already than is either convenient or necessary, their babies always exhibit extraordinary vitality. Nothing seems to kill them. But you were going to play to us, dear. (Violet goes to piano again and begins to play. After a few moments Lady Faringford beclcons to Stella, who rises^crosesL. and sits by her mother. Lady Faringford begins to talk under cover of the music.) 16 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. Lady Faringford. By the way, Stella, how are things going between you and Henry? Stella, (who has been ahsorhed in the music, turns to Lady Faringford quickly) What do you mean mother? Lady Faringford. Has he asked you to marry him yet ? Stella. No. Lady Faringford. Strange ! I thought he would have done so before now. I have given him several opportunities. Stella. Mother ! Lady Faringford. He is going to, I suppose ? Stella. I don't know. Lady Faringford. Nonsense, child. Of course you do. A girl always knows when a man wants to propose to her, unless she is perfectly idiotic. He will certainly propose if you give him proper en- couragement. And when he does you will accept him. Stella, (thoughtfully) Vm not sure. Lady Faringford. Not sure? Why not? You like him, don't you? (three or fonr loud chords on piano) I can't think who invented music after din- ner. One can hardly hear oneself speak. As I was saying, you like him ? Stella. Oh yes. I like him. Lady Faringford. Then of course you will ac- cept him. When a man proposes to a girl and she likes him and he is well off and otherwise eligible she should always accept him. Stella. But (hesitates) I don't love him, mother. Lady Faringford. My dear you must not ex- THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 11 pect impossibities. Love matches aren't very common among people of our class. And they're by no means always successful either. Quite the contrary. If you marry a man you like you may come to love him — in time. But if you marry a man you love you may easily come to loathe him. (Pause.) Stella, (sighs) Well I suppose I shall have to marry him in the end. Lady Faringford. Of course you will. And I'm sure you might do a great deal worse. The Jacksons are really very well off. The business has grown enormously in the past few years. What can be keep- ing Mrs. Jackson so long? Since she left this room she has had time to pauperise the entire village. Lady Faringford. A very dangerous thing to do. Young girls when they fall in love invariably do it with the wrong person. What can be keeping Mrs. Jackson so long? Since she left this room she has had time to pauperise the entire village. Stella. It will take a little time to get the things together, I suppose, for poor Mrs. Simmonds. Lady Faringford. As to being in love that is a thing to which people attach far too much import- ance. Of course the Jacksons are parvenus. But everybody one meets nowadays is either a parvenu or a pauper. And really girls are so numerous just now they can't afford to be as particular as they were. Henry is the only son. Stella. No, mother. There's Eustace. Lady Faringford. I don't count Eustace. He went away years ago — to one of the colonies I be- 18 THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. lieve — and doubtless came to a bad end. Probably he's dead by now. Stella. Mother ! How can you say such terrible things ! Lady Faringford. Nonsense. Of course he's dead. And a very good thing too. Eeally what a noise our good Violet is making — If he weren't dead one would have heard something of him. That sort of young man always makes himself felt by his rela- tions as long as the breath's in his body. Stella. But if he's abroad — Lady Faringford. Then he would write — for money. People in the Colonies always do write for money. You don't remember him do you? Stella. Hardly at all. I've seen him of course. Lady Faringford. Ah. He was a handsome fellow. Clever too. But a thorough detrimental. It's just as well he went to the Colonies. No, my dear, you can't do better than accept Henry. He'll be quite a rich man some day and he's really very fairly presentable. And his father will get into Parliament. Not that that means anything now- adays. {Door opens. Men's voices without.) Here he is. {Enter l. Sir John Faringford, a little hold. The Rector, a little grey, Mr. Jackson, very portly and pompous, and Henry, his son.) Mr. Jackson. Hullo, all alone. Lady Faringford ? What's become of Maria — and Mrs. Pratt ? THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. 19 Violet. (rising from piano — doivn stage and across l.) Simmonds came to ask if he could see Mrs. Pratt. Mrs. Simmonds is ill. Mother and Mrs. Pratt are putting some things together for him to take to her. Lady Faringford. Your daughter has been en- tertaining us with her charming music while Mrs. Jackson was away. What was that little piece you were playing, dear? Violet. A sonata of Beethoven, Lady Faring- ford. Lady Faringford. Indeed? Very pretty. The Rector. You are going to play at our next Parish concert I hope, Miss Jackson? Violet. Yes. Mrs. Pratt and I have been get- ting out the programme. Sir John. Miss Jackson is a tower of strength in the musical line. Stella hardly plays a note. I al- v/ays tell my wife it's the result of having had a German governess. How can you expect a child to learn music in German? Lady Faringford. (rising and going up stage) I believe all modern music is written in German. It certainly sounds like it. (Lady Faringford goes up stage, sits and begins to talk to Mr. Jackson. The Rector talks to Vio- let on sofa with Sir John. Henry comes down and sits'hy Stella.) Henry. I hope you haven't been dull, Miss Far- ingford, while my mother has been out of the room. It's shocking of her to leave her guests in this way. 20 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. Stella. Not at all. Vi has been playing to us. It has been delightful. Henry. You're very fond of music, aren't you? Stella. Yes. It's curious. When I was a child they made me learn of course, but I didn't care a bit about it. I was awfully troublesome over my lessons, I remember. So I made nothing of it. And now, when I'd give anything to be able to play, I can't. Henry. Why don't you take it up again? Stella. I do^ try sometimes. Sometimes I set to work and practise feverishly for a whole week. But it doesn't last. Henry. You should persevere. Stella. I know. But I don't. I suppose I'm lazy. But that's like me. I want to do things. I see I ought to do them. But somehow they don't get done. I expect you can't understand that? Henry. I'm afraid I can't. If I want a thing I take the necessary steps to get it. That's what " want- ing " means with me. Stella, {thoughtfully) And do you always get it? Henry. Generally. A man can generally get a thing in the end if he gives his mind to it. Stella. . Most people wouldn't say that. Henry. That's because most people don't know what they want. Instead of fixing their mind on one thing, and being determined to get it, they keep aiming first at one thing and then at another. So of course they don't get anything. They don't deserve to. THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. 21 Stella. Most people don't aim at all. They simply take what comes. Henry. Surely you don't do that ? Stella. I believe I do. (laughing) You see there's really not room for more than one will in any family. In our family it's mamma's. Mamma al- ways knows what she wants — like you. The worst of it is she doesn't always know what we want. Henry, I see. What happens then ? Stella. Oh mamma wins. We struggle a little sometimes, papa and I. But she gets her way in the end. (a pause) Henry. Miss Faringford, there's something I want to say to you. Stella. That sounds very serious. Henry. It is serious to me. It's something I've wanted to tell you for a long time. Stella, (rising nervously) Well, don't tell it me to-night. Later on perhaps. I don't think I want to hear about serious things to-night. (Door opens — enter Mrs. Jackson and Mrs. Pratt a little later.) Henry, (rising also) When may I tell it to you? Stella. I don't know. Sometime, perhaps. But not now. (Lady Faringford comes down.) Here's your mother come back with Mrs. Pratt. Mrs. Jackson. Lady Faringford, what will you 22 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. think of me for leaving you so long. But the house- keeper was out. She had gone down to the village, to see her niece who is ill. So Mrs. Pratt and I had to put the things together for Simmonds ourselves. Mrs. Simmonds has another baby, Samuel, (sits) Mrs. Pratt. The poor are terribly thoughtless in these matters. That makes her sixth. I'm bound to say poor Simmonds seemed quite conscious of his folly. Lady Faringford. (l. hj tahle r.) That at least is satisfactory. But I have no hope that it will af- fect his future conduct. He will go on having children — at the usual intervals — until he dies. And then they will come on the Parish. Mrs. Jackson. But is Simmonds going to die? He said nothing about it. But of course he was rather flurried. Mr. Jackson. I hope you sent whatever was necessar}^, Maria? Mrs. Pratt. Far more. I really had to interfere to prevent Mrs. Jackson from emptying her store cupboard. The Rector. Well, well, I dare say poor Mrs. Simmonds will find a use for everything. Mr. Jackson. No doubt. And besides with an election in prospect — Sir John. Exactly. It can do no harm. Mr. Jackson. By the way, Sir John, as chair- man of my election committee, there's a point on which I want your advice, {brings him down stage) The local Branch of the Independent Order of Good Templars wrote to me ten days ago asking for a sub- scription. So I sent five guineas. THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 23 (Mrs. Jackson rises and goes to Mrs. Pratt at table up stage.) Sir John. Quite right. The Temperance Vote must be reckoned with in this Division. Mr. Jackson. Just so. But the Good Templars published the fact in the local newspaper. Sir John. Well, that's what you wanted, wasn't it? Mr. Jackson. Ye-es. No doubt. But I forgot that the Secretary of the Local Branch of the Licensed Victuallers Association would be sure to see the paragraph and write to me for an explanation. Sir John. I see. Did he? Mr. Jackson. Yes. Sir John. Ah ! What did you do ? Mr. Jackson. I was in some doubt. But Sims, my agent, told me the Licensed Victuallers had a Benevolent Fund or something. So I sent ten guineas to that. That seemed the best way out of the difficulty. Sir John. Much the best, much the best, {trying to escape) Mr. Jackson, (detaining him) But that's not the end of the matter. For now the Good Templars have written to ask if I am prepared to support any legislation designed to combat the evil of the Drink Traffic. And the Licensed Victuallers want to know if I will pledge myself to oppose any Bill which aims at the reduction of the sale of intoxicating liquors. Sir John. Hum ! They rather had you there ! Mr. Jackson. Yes. . . . However, I think 24 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. I've got out of it all right. I've written a letter to the Licensed Victuallers to say I'm not in favor of unduly restricting the sale of liquor in the interests of Temperance Propaganda. And I've written an- other to the Good Templars saying that I'm quite in favor of Temperance Propaganda providing it doesn't unduly restrict the sale of intoxicating liquor. I think that meets the case ? Sir John. I see. Running with the hare and hunting with the hounds in fact? Quite right. And now we really must be saying good-night, {to Lady Faringford) Come, my dear. It's time we were going. Mrs. Jackson. Oh, you mustn't go yet. It's quite early. Lady Faringford. We are early people, (rises) We really must go. Stella, my dear, we must be putting on our things. Henry. I'll ask if your carriage is round, (rings) Lady Faringford. If you will be so good. I told the coachman ten. I do hope it's stopped rain- ing. I believe the farmers want it but it's so bad for the horses. (Enter Baines.) Henry. Lady Faringford's carriage. Baines. It's at the door, sir. Henry. Very well. Lady Faringford. Good-night then, Mrs. Jack- son. Such a pleasant evening. Come, Stella. (Mrs. Jackson hy Eector.) THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. 25 (General adieux. The Faringfords and Stella go out escorted hy Henry and Mr. Jackson.) Mrs. Pratt. I think we ought to be going too. Mrs. Jackson. No. No. You mustn't run away like that. I've not had a moment to speak to the liector. And I'm sure Vi will want to talk to you about the next concert. Sit down again, Mrs. Pratt. (Mrs. Jackson r. sofa) (Re-enter Henry and Mr. Jackson.) What sort of a night is it, Samuel? Has it stopped (Henry goes to Violet.) raining ? Mr. Jackson. Yes, it's not raining now. But it's very dark. The Kector. The moon's full too. But I sup- pose there's too much cloud about. Mrs. Jackson. I do hope it will be lighter before you have to go home. It's such a dark road from here to the Rectory. The Rector. We have a lantern. We always bring it when we go out at night. We don't trust the moon. She's fickle, Mrs. Jackson, like all her sex. Mrs. Jackson. Rector, if you talk like that I shall scold you. And so will Mrs. Pratt. (Sudden noise of footsteps outside. Then door opens and enter Baines, rather flurried.) 26 THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. Baines. {a little hreathlcss) If you please, Sir, — Mr. Jackson. Well, what is it, Baines? Baines. If you i)lease, Sir, it's Mr. Eustace. (Mr. Jackson turns sharp round.) He was lying just by the front door. Mr. Jackson. Mr. Eustace? Mrs. Jackson, (jumping up) Eustace! Baines. Yes, Sir. Yes, Madam. Thomas saw him just as he was coming in after shutting the front gate. The moon came out for a moment and he saw him. He's fainted, Sir. At least I think so. (Mrs. Jackson moves across as Violet meets her c.) Mrs. Jackson. I must go to him. Mr. Jackson. No. Not you, Maria. I'll go. (The door opens.) Baines. I think they're bringing him in here, Sir. {Enter the Two Footmen carrying a draggled and dishevelled body hy the shoulders and the heels.) (Pause. Violet moves the arm chair to r. where it is taken hy Henry. The Rector and Violet move the sofa to receive the body as the Footmen bring it l.) THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 27 (Mrs. Pratt by piano, Mrs. Jackson by body's head — All standing by the sofa.) Mrs. Jackson. Oh, my poor boy ! My poor dear boy! (rushes to him) YiOLET. Wait a minute. Put him here. Mrs. Jackson. Oh, he's dead! He's dead! I know he's dead. Violet, (immediately) Hush, mother. Some brandy, quick, Baines. And some cold water. I think he's only fainted, (puts cushion under his head and opens shirt at necJc) The Eector. Poor fellow. Mrs. Pratt. Oh, Mrs. Jackson. Your sofa ! It will be utterly ruined. Mrs. Jackson, (bending over him) Oh, I wish they'd be quick with the brandy. Henry, go at once for Dr. Glaisher. The Rector. Let me go. We pass his house any- way. And we mustn't stay any longer. We should only be in the way here. Come, my dear. (Enter Baines with brandy and jug of water.) Mrs. Pratt. Good-bye, dear Mrs. Jackson. No. You mustn't stir. And I do hope he'll be all right soon. We'll send Dr. Glaisher round at once. The Rector. Good-bye. (to Henry) Don't come with me my dear fellow. Baines can find my things. Stay and look after your brother. (Exeunt Mr. and Mrs. Pratt and Baines.) (Meantime Mrs. Jackson has been trying to force some brandy between clenched teeth of the patient.) ^8 THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. Violet. Your handkerchief, Henry. Quick. (Henry gives it. She dips it in jug, wrings it out and puts it over patient's forehead hy way of bandage. ) Mrs. Jackson. He doesn't stir. Mr. Jackson. I can feel his heart beating a little, I think. But I'm not sure. Mrs. Jackson, (lamentahly) Oh, will he never come round ! I wish Dr. Glaisher would come. If he were to die ! Violet, (soothing her) Hush, mother! He's only fainted. Didn't you hear father say he could feel his heart beating? Mrs. Jackson. Isn't there anything else we could do ? My salts ! Violet, (rising) I'll get them, mother. Mrs. Jackson. They're on my dressing table. (Exit Violet hurriedly.) No, I remember, I had them in the library this morn- ing, I'll go and look. Or was it the breakfast room ? I'm not sure. Oh dear, oh dear, poor darling Eustace ! (Exit in hurst of tears.) Mr. Jackson. She'll never find them. You go, Henry, and help her. Try the breakfast room. (Exeunt all save Mr. Jackson and Eustace.) (After Mr. Jackson has fidgetted round his son for a minute or so in helpless and grotesque efforts to restore his son to consciousness Violet's voice is heard through door which is left open.) THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 29 Violet, (without) Father! Mr. Jackson, (going to door, hurriedly) Yes, yes, what is it? (Enter Violet.) Violet. Have you your keys ? Mother thinks she may have left her salts on your desk in the library and its locked. Mr. Jackson. Tck! Here they are. (Violet going) I'd better come or you'll disturb all my papers. (Exeunt Mr. Jackson and Violet.) (The stage is left empty for a moment of all save the man on the sofa. Presently Eustace raises him^ self cautiously, looJcs round, then finding no one there takes off head bandage and wrings it out, listens again, then sits up and puts feet to ground, picks up a hook, on which he has been lying with conspicuous red cover, glances at it, reads title " Hester's Escape," makes face, hears sound without, hurriedly puts feet up again on couch, re- places bandage and lays his head back on pillow just as Mrs. Jackson re-enters with Henry.) Mrs. Jackson, (piteously) They're not in the library. Where can I have put them? Henry. The others will find them. Violet is looking in your bed-room. She always finds things. And the Governor is in the breakfast room. They'll be here in a moment. (Enter Violet with salts in her hand, followed at a $hort interval by Mr. Jackson.) 30 THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. Mrs. Jackson. Thanks dear. {Iwlds the salts tremulously to patient's nose, hut forgetting to take out stopper, kneeling by his side) Where were they? (kneels hy sofa) Violet. In the dining room, on the writing table. Mrs. Jackson. Oh, yes, I remember. I had them there at lunch time. I knew I had put them some- where. Henry, (irritahly) My dear mother, there's no use holding those salts to his nose unless you take the stopper out. (Mrs. Jackson fumbles with stopper. Patient stirs slightly and turns away his head.) Mr. Jackson. He^s coming round. He moved a little. Try him with some more brandy. (Mrs. Jackson puts down salts and takes up brandy which she pours into patient's mouth. He makes elaborate business of coming round, gives a sigh, opens his eyes, then raises himself and looks round.) Eustace. Is that you, mother? Mrs. Jackson. Yes, dear, yes. Eustace. Where am I? Mrs. Jackson. At home, dear. Your own home. Oh, he's not dead ! He's not dead ! (embracer him sobbing passionately) Curtain. o D o THE RETURN OF THE PRODiaAL. Si ACT 11. Scene: — The hreakfast room at the Jacksons'. In the middle of stage the hreahfast table which is round and would hold about six people. It is fully laid with cloth, tea and coffee things, toast, dishes, etc. The fireplace (no fire) is on the right and above and below it are leather-covered armchairs. There is a large French window at back through which is seen garden. The windoius are open as it is a bright summer day. There is a door r. up to hall. On the left is a sideboard on which stand fruit, some spare plates, etc., also a box of cigars and a box of cigarettes. On either side of the window are bookcases. Down l., below sideboard, a writing table. When the curtain rises Mr. Jack- son sits R. of table. Henry on left, Violet on the side furthest from footlights. She has the coffee, etc., in front of her. Mr. Jackson is faced by bacon dishes. They all go on eating their break- fasts for half a minute after curtain has risen. Henry is reading a neivspaper propped up by his side. Violet is reading letters. Henry, {handing cup) More coffee, please, Vio- let, {to Mr. Jackson) Wenhams have failed, father. 32 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. Mr. Jackson. It's only what we expected, isn't it? Henry. Yes. Forty thousand they say here. But of course it's only a guess. No one can know till the accounts are made up. Mr. Jackson. They've been shaky for some time. (Enter Mrs. Jackson.) Well, how is he ? Mrs. Jackson. Much better. He looks quite a different person. Mr. Jackson. Did he eat any breakfast? Mrs. Jackson. He hasn't had any yet. At least only a cup of tea. He says he'd rather come down. He's getting up now. Violet. Didn't Dr. Glaisher say he was to stay in bed? Mrs. Jackson. Yes. But if he wants to come down I don't think it can do any harm. He can lie down on the sofa till lunch if he feels tired. Mr. Jackson. What time is Glaisher coming? Violet. Half-past ten, he said. Henry. Has Eustace explained how he came to be lying in the drive in that state? Last night we could get nothing out of him. Mrs. Jackson. No wonder. He was dazed, poor boy. He had walked all the way from London and had had nothing to eat. Henry. How was it he was in London. He was sent to Australia. Mrs. Jackson. He had been in Australia. He worked his passage home. THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. U Mr. Jackson. His money is all gone, I suppose — the thousand pounds I gave him? Mrs. Jackson. I don't know, Samuel. I didn't ask. Mr. Jackson. Humph ! (pause) I'll trouble you for the toast please. Henry. Henry. I suppose we'd better make enquiries about Wenhams' father. It might be worth our while to buy the mill if it goes cheap. Then we could run it and ours together. Mr. Jackson. Just so. Will you see to that? (Henry nods.) Mrs. Jackson. I've got a letter to Aunt Isabel to send by the early post. I ought to have written it last night. Will you put it into the box for me, Samuel, as you go to the mill? (goes l. to writ-' ingtable and sits.) Mr. Jackson. Certainly, my dear. Henry. Very tiresome Eustace turning up in that disreputable condition last night. What will Stella think ? Mr. Jackson. It's lucky the Faringfords had gone before he was brought in. Henry. The Pratts hadn't. Mrs. Pratt will have told the entire village before lunch time. Violet. I don't see why we should mind if she does. There's nothing to be ashamed of. {rises and reads letter by fireplace) Henry, (impatiently) Well, we won't discuss it. (returns to his paper) Mrs. Jackson, (moving nearer Henry to get 34 THE RETURN OP THE PROCiaAL. paper) By the way, Henry, did you say anything to Stella last night? Henry (hesitates) No. Mr. Jackson. I thought you were going to? Henry. I was. In fact I did begin. But she didn't let me finish. I suppose she didn't under- stand what I was going to say. Mr. Jackson. Don't put it off too long. There may be an election any day now and the Faringford influence means a great deal. Henry. You've got Faringford's influence al- ready. He's chairman of your committee. Mr. Jackson. That's true. Still, he'll take more trouble when I'm one of the family so to speak. Yes, I shouldn't put it off if I were you. Henry. Very well, father. Mr. Jackson. Of course Faringford is as poor as Job. The estate's mortgaged up to the hilt. And anything there is after he and Lady Faringford go out of the coach — if there is anything — will go to the son. Stella won't have a sixpence. Still they're good people, position in the county and all that. And you'll have enough money for both. Henry. Yes. Especially if we get hold of Wen- hams' mill. I'm sure I could make a good thing out of it. We'd put in turbines as we did here, get new machinery and double our output. Mr. Jackson. How are the turbines working by the way? Henry. All right. And they'll go still better when the new sluices are done, (rising) Well, I shall go over to the mill now. Are you coming? THE nETUilN OP I'HE PRODIGAL. 35 Mr. Jackson. In a moment, {finishes his coffee and rises) {Exit Henry r.) Violet. Shall I get your hat and stick, father? Mr. Jackson. Do, dear. {Exit Violet r.)' Is your letter ready, Maria? Mrs. Jackson. Just done, {fastens it up. ris- ing) You won't forget it, will you? {Re-enter Henry with hat r.) Mr. Jackson. No. Or if I do Henry will re- mind me. Mrs. Jackson, {to Henry) Won't you wait and see Eustace before you go, Henry? He'll be down in a moment. Henry. It doesn't matter. I shall see him soon enough. Coming father? {Exit c.) Mrs. Jackson. I think Henry might have stayed to see Eustace before he started. . Mr. Jackson. I dare say he'll be over m the course of the morning. (Violet re-entering.) Violet. Here's your hat and stick, father. Mr. Jackson. That's a good girl, {kisses her) Good-bye. I shall be in for lunch. 36 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. (Exit c.) Mrs. Jackson, (going to hacon dish and lifting cover) We must order some more bacon. Or do you think Eustace had better have an egg ? Violet. Shall I go up and ask him? Mrs. Jacksoist. Do dear. And I wonder if you'd see cook at the same time and ask her if she's want- ing anything. I have to go into the village. Violet. Very well, mother. {Exit Violet r. Mrs. Jackson taJces away plates to sideboard, clears a place for Eustace where Henry sat and lays for him) Baines. (announcing) Dr. Glaisher. (Enter Dr. Glaisher r.)' Mrs. Jackson, (shaking hands) Oh, doctor. Good morning, (to Baines) Tell Mr. Eustace Dr. Glaisher is here. (Exit Baines.) «^ Dr. Glaisher. (hrisTc and professional) Well, how does he seem ? Going on well ? Mrs. Jackson. Quite well, I think. Dr. Glaisher. Did he have a good night? Mrs. Jackson. Excellent he says. Dr. Glaisher. Ah. Just so. Shall I go up to him? Mrs. Jackson. He's coming down for break- fast. He'll be here in a moment. Dr. Glaisher. Coming down is he? (by fire- place) Come, that looks satisfactory. Still we must be careful. No overfatigue. His condition last THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 37 night gave cause for considerable anxiety. Indeed I may say that if I had not fortunately been sent for at once and applied the necessary remedies there was distinct danger of collapse, um! distinct danger. Mrs. Jackson. Oh, Doctor ! {Enter Eustace r. very fresh and genial in an ad- mirahle suit of clothes.) Dr. Glaisher. Ah, here he is. Eustace. Good morning, mother, {kisses her) Hullo, doctor. Come to see me? Dr. Glaisher. {shaking hands) Well, and how are we this morning? Eustace. Getting on all right, I think. A bit limp and washed out perhaps. Dr. Glaisher. Just so. The temperature nor- mal? No fever? {touches forehead) That's right. Pulse, {feels it) A little irregular, perhaps. But nothing serious. Excitement due to overfatigue no doubt. Now, let me see your tongue, {does so) Just so. As I should have expected. Just as I should have expected, dear Mrs. Jackson. Appetite not very good, I suppose ? Eustace. Er — not very. Dr. Glaisher. Just so. Just so. {nods sagaci- ously) Eustace, {gaily) Not dead yet, eh doctor? {sits on arm of chair) Mrs. Jackson. My dear! Dr. Glaisher. {with heavy geniality) We shall pull you through. Oh, we shall pull 3^ou through. But you must take care of yourself for a few days. 38 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. No excitement! No overfatigue. The system wants tone a little, wants tone. Eustace. I see. I'm to take it easy in fact for a bit, eh? Dr. Glaisher. Just so. Eustace. I won't forget. I say what clever beg- gars you doctors are! You feel a fellow's pulse and look at his tongue and you know all about him at once. Don't you ? Dr. Glaisher. (phased) Not all perhaps. But there are indications, symptoms, which the pro- fessional man can interpret. . . . Eustace, (interruptmg) Quite extraordinary. I say, what do you think of these clothes? Not had are they. They're Henry's. But I chose them — out of his drawers. Poor old Henry ! Mrs. Jackson. How naughty of you, Eustace. I'm sure Henry won't like it. Eustace. Of course he won't, mother dear. No- body does like his clothes being worn by someone else. But I must wear something you know. I can't come down to breakfast in a suit of pyjamas. Besides they're Henry's pyjamas. Mrs. Jackson. But I told Thomas specially to put out an old suit of your father's for you. Didn't he do it? Eustace. Yes. But I can't wear the governor's clothes, you know. We haven't the same figure. I say I'd better ring for breakfast, (does so) Mrs. Jackson. Have you ordered it dear? I sent Vi up to ask whether you'd like bacon or eggs. Eustace. Yes. Violet asked me. I said bacon and eggs. thej return of the prodigal. 30 {Enter Violet r.) Hullo, Vi, you're just in time to pour out my coffee. Dr. Glaisher. (shakes hands with Violet) Well, I must be off to my other patients, (to Mrs. Jackson) Good-bye, Mrs. Jackson. He is going on well, quite as well as can be expected that is. There are no fresh symptoms of an unfavorable character. But you must keep him quiet for a few days. There are signs of nervousness about him, a sort of sup- pressed excitement which I don't like. The system wants tone, decidedly wants tone. I'll send him up a mixture to take. He has evidently been through some strain lately. I knew that directly I saw him last night. You can't deceive a doctor! (Man brings in breakfast— rack of toast on table, coffee and rolls on sideboard, clears table of dirty plates, etc., so as to leave only a manageable quan' tity of " business " for Baines when latter has to clear the table later. This is important so that Baines's scene may not have to be played too slowly.) Mrs. Jackson, (anxiously) But you don't think there's anything serious the matter? Dr. Glaisher. No ! no ! Let us hope not. The general constitution is sound enough, not over strong perhaps, but sound. And with youth on his side. Let me see how old is he? iij- Mrs. Jackson. Nine and twenty. ' 5 Dr. Glaisher. Just so. Just so. Well, good morning, (to Eustace.) Good morning. And re- 40 THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. member quiet, perfectly quiet. I'll look in again to- morrow morning and see how he's getting on. Eustace. (nods) Good-bye! (goes towards breakfast table.) (Dr. Glaisher shakes hands with Violet and goes out R. Violet seats herself at table to pour out Eustace's coffee. Mrs. Jackson sits by Eustace.) Mother, I think I must become a doctor. It's the only profession I know of which seems to require no knowledge whatever, and it's the sort of thing I should do rather well, (begins his breakfast) (Exit Footman.) Mrs. Jackson. I dare say, my dear. You must speak to your father about it. . . . (sitting) And now you must tell us all about yourself. What have you been doing all this time? And why have you never written? Eustace. There was nothing to tell you — that you'd have liked to hear. Mrs. Jackson. My dear, of course we should have liked to hear everything about you. Eustace. I doubt it. No news is good news. I bet the governor thought that — and Henry. . ,Mrs. Jackson. No, no, dear. I assure you your father was quite anxious when we never heard — at first. Eustace. Ah well, if the governor was so anx- ious to know how I was he shouldn't have packed me THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. 41 off to x^ustralia. I never could endure writing let- ters. Violet, Still you might have sent us word. It would have been kinder to mother. {Down to fire and sits front of table.) Eustace, (laying his hand on his mother's as it lies on the arm of her chair.) Poor mother. I sup- pose I was a brute. But I've not been very prosper- ous these five years, and as I'd nothing pleasant to say I thought I wouldn't write. Mrs. Jackson. But what became of your money dear? The thousand pounds your father gave you? Eustace. I lost it. Mrs. Jackson. Lost it? Eustace. Part of it went in a sheep farm. I suppose I was a bad farmer. Anyhow the sheep died. The other part I put in a gold mine. I sup- pose I wasn't much of a miner. Anyhow there was no gold in it. I was in the Mounted Police for a time. That was in Natal. It v/asn't bad but it didn't lead to anything. So I cleared out. I've been in a bank in Hong Kong. I've driven a cable car in San Francisco, I've been a steward on a liner, I've been an actor, and I've been a journalist. I've tried my hand at most things in fact. At one time I played in an orchestra. Mrs. Jackson. You were always so fond of music. Eustace, (drihj) Yes, I played the triangle — and took a whack at the big drum between times. Violet. How absurd you are! Eustace. Finallv, I came home. That was when 42 THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. my experience as a steward came in. I worked my passage as one — if you can call it work ! I was sick all the time. Mrs. Jackson. How dreadful ! Eustace. It was — for the passengers. Violet. How long ago was that? Eustace. Only about a month. Since then I've been in London picking up a living one way or an- other. At last, when I found myself at the end of my tet.her, I started to walk here. And here I am. Mrs. Jackson. My dear boy ! You must have found it terribly muddy ! Eustace. I did. But life always is rather muddy, isn't it? At least that's my experience. Mrs. Jackson. But weren't you very tired? Eustace. I was tired, of course. Give me some more coffee, Vi. {She does so.) Well, how have you all been at home? How's the governor ? Mrs. Jackson. He's been very well on the whole. His lumbago was rather troublesome at the end of last year. Otherwise he's been all right. Eustace. Does he stick to business as close as ever? Mrs. Jackson. Not quite. You see Henry's a partner now. The firm is Jackson, Hartopp and Jackson, and he takes a good deal of work off your father's shoulders. Henry is an excellent man of business. (Eustace nods.) Your father gives more of his time to public affairs THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. 43 now. He's a magistrate and been on the County Council for the last three years. And now he's standing for Parliament. Eustace. The family's looking up in the world. The business is flourishing, then ? Mrs. Jackson. Oh, yes. TheyVe put in all new machinery in the last three years. And they've got turbines instead of the old water wheels. That was Henry's idea. And now they can turn out a cheaper cloth than any of the mills round here. Eustace. Cheaper? The Governor used to de- spise cheap cloth. Mrs. Jackson. Yes, but Henry said it was no use making cloth that would last a lifetime if people only wanted it to last twelve months. So he got over new machines — from America. And now they don't make any good cloth at all and your father has trebled his income. Eustace. Bravo, Henry. Mrs. Jackson, (rises) And now I really must go down to the village and do my shopping. Have you got cook's list, Vi? (To side table for cigarettes then nearer to hell.) Violet. Yes, mother. But I'm coming, too. I promised Mrs. Pratt I'd call at the Vicarage before twelve to arrange about the next Mothers' Meeting. Mrs. Jackson, (to Eustace.) You'll find the paper there dear, and some cigarettes unless you think you oughtn't to smoke. I'll ring for them to clear away. And remember, dear. Dr. Glaisher said you were to keep quite quiet, (kisses him.) 44 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. Eustace. All right, mother. I'll remember. (still at table.) (Mrs. Jackson a7id Violet go out. Eustace shuts the door, comes slowly doiun stage. The smile dies out of his face and he gives a percepti- ble yawn. Then he goes r. chooses cigarette, lights it in leisurely fashion. TaTces up paper. Comes to L. Selects chair above fireplace, sits down and begins to read.) {Enter Baines.) You can clear away, Baines. Baines. Thank yon, sir. {pause, clearing away) I hope you're feeling better this morning, sir? {goes on clearing table throughout this scene.) Eustace. Thanks Baines, the doctor thinks Fm getting on all right. Baines. Narrow escape you had last night, sir. Thomas says the carriage wheels must have gone within a foot of your head. Eustace. Thomas is a — I mean does he say that ? Baines. Curious thing we shouldn't have seen you, sir. We must have been that close. But it was a very dark night except when the moon was out. Then it was as bright as day almost. That was how he came to see you, sir. Eustace. Oh that was it, was it? Baines. Yes, sir. You see Thomas had just shut the gate after the carriage drove away and the moon happened to come out. . . THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 45 Eustace, (hored) Quite so. Whose carriage was it by the way? Baines. Sir John Faringford's, sir. Eustace. Well if one's head is to be driven over it may as well be by a member of the aristocracy eh, Baines ! Baines. Certainly, sir. Eustace. Sir John often dine here now-a-days? Baines. Yes, sir. And Lady Faringford, and Miss Stella. Eustace. Miss Stella? Baines. Their daughter, sir. I dare say you wouldn't remember her. Only came out about a year ago. (pause.) Eustace. So my father is standing for Parlia- ment, is he? Baines. Yes, sir. Eustace. Will he get in ? Baines. It's thought so, sir. Eustace. By the way which side is he on? Baines. (puzzled) I beg pardon, sir? Eustace. Which side ? Liberal or Conservative ? Baines. Conservative of course, sir. All the people round here are Conservative. All the gentry, that is. Eustace. More respectable, eh Baines? Baines. Yes, sir. (Baines who has tray in his hand, hears hell, has a moment of indecision then puts tray down on table.) Excuse me, sir. (Exit.) 46 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. (Eustace goes hack to his paper. A moment later Baines returns and looks about on writing table.) Eustace. What is it, Baines ? Do you want any- thing. Baines. If you please, sir, Miss Faringford has called for a book Miss Violet promised to lend her. {continues to search.) Eustace, {after pause) Have you found it? Baines. No, sir. Eustace, {putting down paper on other arm- chair, bored and rising) I'd better see her. {Goes out R. Baines folds tablecloth and puts it away in sideboard drawer.. Is just about to go o^it carrying tray ivhen Enter Stella followed by Eustace r. Draws back to let them pass as they enter.) Come in, Miss Faringford. Perhaps I can find the book for you. What was it like? {Enter Stella.) Stella. It was Just an ordinary looking novel. With a bright red cover. Called " Hester's Escape." {Over by writing table.) Eustace. " Hester's Escape." I seem to remem- ber the name, {turns round and faces her for the first time. Pause. Is obviously struck by the fact that she is a very pretty girl.) But Vi will know THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. 47 where it is. You'd better wait till she comes in. Sit down. She'll be back directly. Stella, {sittmg in armchair hy the fireplace.) Are you sure? Eustace. Quite! {turns round chair at break- fast table in front of fireplace and sits in it.) (Exit Baines.) You won't mind an untidy room, will you? I'm afraid I breakfasted late. Stella. I wonder you are down at all. Eustace, (sits) Oh, I'm all right. Stella. Are you sure you ought to talk ? People who have been ill ought to be quiet, oughtn't they? Eustace. There's really nothing the matter with me. Stella. That's not what Mrs. Pratt told me. I met her in the village as I was coming here. Eustace. Ah, yes. She was present of course when I made my dramatic entry. Did she tell you about it ? I hope it went off well. Stella. You frightened everyone terribly if that's what you mean. Mrs. Pratt says you looked dreadful. She thought you were going to die. Eustace. Quite a thrilling experience for her. She ought to be very much obliged to me. Stella. How can you joke about it ! You might really have died, you know. But when people have travelled all over the world as you have, and endured hardship and danger, I suppose death doesn't seem so terrible to them as it does to us who stay at home. Eustace. I suppose not. They get used to it. 48 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. Stella. Have you often been in great danger, really great I mean? Eustace. I was at Singapore when the Plague was there. Stella. How awful. Eustace. Yes. It wasn't pleasant. Stella. I can't think how anyone can stay in England when he might go out and see the world. If I were a man I would go abroad and visit strange countries and have wonderful adventures as you have done, not waste my life in a dull little village like Chedleigh. Eustace. My dear Miss Faringford, the whole world is a dull little village like Chedleigh, and I've wasted my life in it. {Enter Baines.) Baines. If you please, sir, the Rector has called to ask how you are. Eustace. Oh, bother. Say I'm very much obliged and I'm all right. Baines. He said he would like to see you if you felt well enough, sir. Eustace. Ah! wait a minute, (thinks) Will you say I'm not well at all and quite unfit to see him this morning. Baines. Very well, sir. {Exit R.) Stella, (rising) And now I must go. I'm only tiring you. I expect you oughtn't to talk. THE: JlBTURN OP THE PRODIGAL. 40 Eustace. But I assure you Stella. And as you^re quite unfit to see visi- tors— Eustace. I'm quite unfit to see the Rector. That's quite a different thing. I'm perfectly up to seeing you. Besides Violet should be here directly, now. Sit down again. Stella, (hesitating) I don't think I ought to stay. Eustace. I'm sure you ought. One should visit the sick you know. Stella, (with a laugh) You don't seem quite able to make up your mind whether you are ill or well. Eustace. No. I vary. I find it more conven- ient. (Enter Baines r.) (irritably) Well, what is it now, Baines? Baines. Lady Faringford. (Enter Lady Faringford r. Eustace rises.) Stella, (rising) Mamma! Lady Faringford. (ignoring her) Mr. Eustace Jackson, is it not ? How do you do ? (shakes hands frigidly) I heard in the village of your sudden re- turn and stopped the carriage to ask how you were. As the servant told me you were downstairs I thought I would come in for a moment. Eustace. Very kind of you, Lady Faringford. Lady Faringford. (severely) You hardly ap- pear as ill as I expected. 50 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. Eustace. I hope the disappointment is an agree- able one ? Lady Faringford. No disappointments are agreeable, sir. And pray what are you doing here, Stella? Eustace. Miss Faringford called for a book my sister lent her last night, " Hester's Escape." I persuaded her to come in and sit down till Violet re- turned. Lady Faringford. You are expecting her soon ? Eustace. Every moment. Lady Faringford. Ah. Then I don't think we can wait. Eustace. But, Miss Faringford's book. She mustn't go away without it. Sit down for a mo- ment while I see if I can find it. (to Stella) A bright red cover I think you said, (looks round the room for it.) Lady Faringford. (icily) Pray don't trouble, Mr. Jackson. Eustace. " Hester's Escape ? " I'm sure I've seen it somewhere. (tliinJcs a moment) I know. It was in the drawing room, last night. Excuse me for a moment. I'll go and get it. (Exit r.) Lady Faringford. (sitting down, sternly) Really Stella, I'm surprised at you. Stella. What is it. Mamma? Lady Faringford. You know , perfectly well. How long have you been here ? Stella. (sulkily) I don't know About ten minutes, perhaps. THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 51 Lady Faringford. Do you make a habit of pay- ing morning calls upon young men without a chap- eron Stella. No, mamma. Lady Faringford. Then I hope you will not begin to do so. Stella. I came to call for a book which Vi promised to lend me. Yi was out and Mr. Jackson very kindly asked me to come in and wait. What harm is there in that? Lady Faringford. There is every harm. Un- derstand, please, that Mr. Eustace Jackson is not a suitable acquaintance for you. Stella. He is Henry's brother. You have no objection to my knowing Henry. Laj)Y Faringford. That is quite different. Henry has a large income and excellent prospects. He is a man whom any young girl may be allowed to know. Eustace is a mere ne'er-do-well. Stella. Am I never to speak to anyone who isn't rich ? The Du Cranes aren't rich or the Vere- Anstruthers. Yet we know them. We aren't rich ourselves if it comes to that. Lady Faringford. That has nothing to do with it. The Du Cranes and poor George Anstruther are gentlepeople. The Jacksons are tradesmen. Stella. I think people make far too much fuss about being " gentlepeople." Lady Faringford. Then I hope you won't say so. I don't like this pernicious modern jargon about shopkeepers and gentlefolk being much the same. There's far too much truth in it to be agreeable. Stella. If it's true why shouldn't we say it? 52 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. Lady Farikgford. Because we have everything to lose by doing so. We were born into this world with what is called position. Owing to that posi- tion we are received everywhere, flattered, made much of. Though we are poor, rich people are eager to invite us to their houses and marry our daughters. So much the better for us. But if we began telling people that position was all moon- shine, family an antiquated superstition and many duchesses far less like ladies than their maids, the world would ultimately discover that wha4; we were saying was perfectly true. Whereupon we should lose the very comfortable niche in the Social system which we at present enjoy and — who knows? — might actually be reduced in the end to doing some- thing useful for our living like other people. No, No, my dear, rank and birth and the peerage may be all nonsense, but it isn't our business to say so. Leave that to vulgar people who have something to gain by it. Noblesse oblige! (Enter Eustace r. with the book in his hand.) Eustace. Here is the book, Miss Faringford. I hope you haven't had to wait too long. It was in the drawing room as I thought, but it had got put away under some papers. Stella. Thank you so much. Lady Faringford. (rising, icily) Good-bye, Mr. Jackson. Stella. Good-bye. Give my love to Violet. (shakes hands.) THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. 53 {Exeunt Lady Faringford and Stella escorted by Eustace r. After a moment Enter Henry hy window c. He has some papers with him which he has brought from the mill. He tahes off hat, puts papers on table up, is about to write letter when re-enter Eustace.) Eustace. {after moment strolls across l. to Henry.) Hullo, Henry. Where did you spring from? {They shaTce hands.) Henry. From the mill. I came across the lawn. We had a short cut made through the shrubbery and a gate put three years ago. It's quicker. Eustace. One of your improvements, eh? Henry. Yes. (Eustace laughs.) You're amused? Eustace. It's so like you having a path made so as to get to your work quicker. Henry. Yes. I'm not an idler. Eustace. Quite so. And / am, you mean? (Eustace sits.) Henry, {shrugs) I didn't say so. Eustace. You wanted to spare my feelings, no doubt. Very thoughtful of you, {a pause.) Henry. Is your mother in? Eustace. I believe not. . . By the way I've 54 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. been borrowing some of youp clothes. Not a bad fit are they ? It^s lucky we're so much the same size. Henry, {grimly) Very ! Eustace. It^s particularly lucky as I've been entertaining visitors on behalf of the family. Henry, Indeed ? Eustace. Yes. One of them a very charming visitor. Henry. Who was that ? Eustace. Miss Faringford. Henry. Stella? Eustace. Yes. Very nice girl altogether. She was here quite a long time while I told her my ad- ventures — or as much of them as I thought suitable. Then unhappily her mother turned up. Rather an awful woman that. Henry. What did Stella come for? Eustace. Not to enquire after me if that's what you mean. Miss Faringford came for a book Vi had lent her, " Hester's Escape." She's certainly a very pretty girl. And a nice one. Henry, {stiffly) I may as well tell you I in- tend to marry Stella Faringford. Eustace. Indeed, {pause) Have you asked her yet? Henry. No. Eustace. Then I wouldn't be too sure if I were you. Perhaps she won't have you. Henry, {rising after silence) Oh, by the way, how are you? Eustace. I'm all right thanks. Henry, {irritably) How on earth did you come to be lying in the drive in that way last night? THB RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. 5S Eustace, (airily) Exhaustian, my dear chap. Cold and exposure! Hunger. You know the kind of thing. Henry. Cold? Why it's the height of summer. Eustace. Heat, then. Henry. But how did you manage to get here. That's what I want to know. You were supposed to be in Australia. Eustace, {beginning to laugh) I'll tell you. (sits on table) Only you must promise not ta give me away. (Henry turns.) I was awfully hard up and awfully sick of finding jobs and losing them and at last I began to long for a proper dinner, properly served, and a decent suit of clothes. Like these. I thought of writing to the governor. But that would have been no good. He'd have sefit me some good advice and the mater would have sent a fiver and in a fortnight things would have been as bad as ever. At last I thought of a dramatic cotip. The Prodigal's Return! The Fatted Calf. A father softened, a mother in tears. The virtuous elder brother scowling in the back- ground. So I came here. Back to the Old Home you know. At the front door I selected a convenient spot and lay down in an elaborate faint. Excuse the pun. I chose the moment just after the Faring- fords^ carriage had gone. I knew the footman would have to come in after shutting the gate and I in- tended to kick his leg and groan in an impressive manner. Anything to attract attention. Fortu- nately the moon came out just at the right moment 56 THS RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. so the fool couldn't help spotting me. He called Baines who recognised me in a moment. They were very sympathetic ! I expect they thought I was drunk. The lower classes are always sympathetic to intoxication. I was home into the drawing room. The wandering sheep returned to the fold, the exile home again. Tableau ! most pathetic ! Henry, (disgusted) And so you walked all the way from London to Chedleigh in order to play off a heartless practical joke. Eustace. Walked ? Nonsense. I came by train. (walks across followed by Henry.) Henry. But you told Vi you walked. Eustace. I said I started to walk. I only got as far as the station. Henry, (angrily) It was unpardonable. The mater was awfully upset. So was the Governor. Eustace. That was the idea. There's nothing like a sudden shock to bring out anyone's real feel- ings. The Governor had no idea how fond he was of me until he saw me apparently dead and unlikely to give him further trouble. And by the time I came round he'd forgotten the cause of his sudden af- fection — or perhaps he's never realised it — and was genuinely glad to see me. Psychologically it was most interesting. (Eustace goes up to window.) Henry. It was extremely undignified and quite unnecessary. If you had simply come up to the front door and rung the bell you would have been received just as readily. Eustace. I doubt it. THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 57 (Henry moves to l.) In fact, I doubt if I should have been received at all. I might possibly have been given a bed for the night, but only on the distinct understanding that I left early the next morning. Whereas now nobody talks of my going. A poor invalid. In the doctor's hands ! Perfect quiet essential ! No. My plan was best. (Henry moves up to Eustace and past Mm down to fire.) Henry. Why didn't that fool Glaisher see through you? Eustace. Doctors never see through their pa- tients. It's not what they're paid for and it's con- trary to professional etiquette. (Henry makes exclamation of disgust). Besides Glaisher's an ass, I'm glad to say. Henry, (fuming) It would serve you right if I told the Governor the whole story. Eustace. I daresay. But you won't, (tahes out chair) It wouldn't be cricket. Besides I only told you on condition you kept it to yourself, (sits). Henry, (exasperated) So I'm to be made a part- ner in your fraud. The thing's a swindle and I've got to take a share in it. Eustace. Swindle? Not a bit. (sits) You've lent a hand, without intending it, to reuniting a happy family circle. Smoothed the way for the Prodigal's return. A very beautiful trait in your character. 5* THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. Henry, (grumpy) What I don^t understand is why you told me all this. Why in Heaven^s name didn't you keep the whole discreditable story to your- self? Eustace. The fact is I was pretty sure you'd find me out. The Governor's a perfect owl but you've got brains — of a kind. You can see a thing when it's straight before your nose. So I thought I'd let you into the secret from the start, just to keep youT mouth shut. Henry, (exclamation of impatience) And what are you going to do now you are at home ? Eustace. Do, my dear chap ? Why nothing. CURTAIN. ^6 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 59 ACT III. Scene — The Lawn at Chedleigh Court. Ten days have passed since Act II. It is a Saturday and the time is after luncheon. The House itself, with its French windows on to the lawn, is on the right of stage. The iach represents the garden with paddocTc beyond hounded hy stream on which stands the mill, a picturesque old Tudor structure of grey stone. The garden is also supposed to stretch away l. into the ivings and there is a path up L. leading off to Mill. The other entrance is through the French windows R. from house. When the curtain rises Eustace is discovered in new grey flannel suit in a hammock towards the l. swinging indolently. There is a wicker table about c. and three or four wicker garden chairs with bright red cushions. In one of these Henry is seated, reading a newspaper. Eustace has cup of coffee in his hand. Henry has one on table beside him. Presently Eustace drinks some, looking with indolent amusement at his brother absorbed in his newspaper. Eustace. Not bad coffee, this, (finishes it and be- gins to perform acrobatic feat of putting cup and saucer on ground without breaking them). Henry, (looking up) I daresay, (takes some) You'll drop that cup. 60 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. Eustace. I think not, {puts it successfully on ground) . Henry. If you leave it there someone's sure to put his foot in it. Eustace. I'll risk it. Henry. Bah! {rises and puts Eustace's cup on table) Eustace. Thanks, old man. Perhaps it is safer there. (Henry grunts again and returns to his newspaper. Eustace gets cigarette out of pocket and lights it indolently.) Anything exciting in the paper? Any convulsions in Wool? Henry. No. Eustace. Where's the Governor? He generally comes home to luncheon on Saturdays, doesn't he? Henry. He's lunching at the Wilmingtons' with the mater. He'll he back soon. There's a meeting of his Election Committee at four. Eustace. Where? Henry. Here. Eustace. Will he get in ? Henry. Faringford thinks so. But it'll be a close thing. A very little might turn the scale either way. Eustace. Cost him a good deal I suppose? Henry. Pretty well. Eustace. Panem et Circenses, bread and cir- cuses. That's the Tory prescription, isn't it? Par- ticularly circuses. Henry. I dare say. THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 61 Servant, {ushering Dr. Glaisher from French windows R.) Dr. Glaisher to see you, sir. {removes cups and exit r.) Eustace. How do you do, Doctor, {shaking hands) I'm following your prescription you see. Rest ! Rest ! There's nothing like it. Dr. Glaisher. Just so. I really came for your father's committee. I thought it was to be at three o'clock. But your man tells me it's not till four. So I thought I'd like to look at my patient. Well, and how are we to-day? (Henry watches this scene with mingled rage and disgust to Eustace's huge delight.) Eustace. Going on all right thanks. Still a little limp perhaps. Dr. Glaisher. Just so. The temperature nor- mal? No fever? That's right. {Feels pulse) Pulse? {pause) Quite regular. Now the tongue. Just so. {to Henry) As I should have expected. Just as I should have expected. Appetite still good? Eustace. Excellent, thanks. Dr. Glaisher. You're still taking your glass of port at eleven? Just so, oh you'll soon be all right. Eustace. Thanks to you. Doctor. Dr. Glaisher. Not at all. Not at all. {To Henry) He'll soon be himself again now. Sys- tem still wants tone a little, wants tone. I'll send him round some more of that mixture. Otherwise he's all right. (Henry grunts), Eustace. And you'll look in again in a day or 62 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. two (Henry rises and goes up) just to see how I am, won't you, Doctor ? Dr. Glaisher. Certainly, if you wish it. And now I must be off. I have a couple of patients near here whom I could see in the next half hour and be back again by four. Good-bye. Good-bye. Don't disturb yourself pray. (Fusses off R.) Henry, (savagely) Ass! Eustace. My dear chap ! Henry. Old Glaisher is a perfect noodle, (down stage R.) Eustace. Naturally. How much does a little country doctor make here-abouts? Four hundred a year? Say four hundred and fifty. You can't ex- pect a first-rate intellect for that. "Tisn't the market rate. Henry. I don't expect an absolute idiot. Eustace. Glaisher doesn't know anything of course, but his manner is magnificently impressive. After he's talked to me for five minutes, felt my pulse and looked at my tongue I almost begin to won- der whether Vm not really ill after all. That's a great gift for a doctor! Henry. You're perfectly well. Any fool can see that merely by looking at you. And old Glaisher goes on with his mixture and his glass of port at eleven. Bah ! (Eustace laughs.) And you encourge him. How many visits has he paid you? Eustace. I don't know. Seven or eight. Henry. And every one of them completely un- necessary. THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. 63 Eustace. Completely unnecessary for me but very useful to old Glaisher considering they mean half a guinea apiece to him. Henry. Which the Governor pays. Eustace. Which the Governor pays as you say. That's why I do it. Somebody must keep old Glaisher going or what would become of all the little Glaishers? Here's the Governor with piles of money to throw away on Parliamentary elections and simi- lar tomfoolery. Why shouldn't I divert some of it to old Glaisher. I like the little man. Henry. You're awfully generous — with other people's money. Eustace. I am. Whose money are ijou generous with? (Henry goes up stage.) (Henry snorts with disapproval. Enter l. from garden Mr. fl??^ Mrs. Jackson in outdoor things, as from a luncheon party). Morning father, {Enter Mrs. Jackson) I've not seen you before to-day. You went out before I got down. Mr. Jackson. {gruffly, sitting down) Good morning. (Mrs. Jackson having hissed Eustace, sits). Eustace. Morning, Mummy, {to Mr. Jackson) By the way you've just missed one of your Election Committee. Mr. Jackson, {alarmed) Not Sir John? It's only half-past three. 64 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. Eustace. No — only little Glaisher. He said he was too early. However, as you weren't there he came and had a look at me. Mrs. Jackson. What did he say, dear? Eustace. Said I was getting on all right. He's coming to have another look at me in a day or two. Mr. Jackson. When does he think you'll be well enough to get to work again ? Eustace. I don't know. I didn't ask him. Mrs. Jackson. Oh, Samuel, it's too soon to think of that yet! (Mrs. Jackson sits at c. table) The poor boy's only convalescent. Wait till Dr. Glaisher has stopped his visits. (Snort from Henry). Eustace. My dear Henry what extraordinary noises you make. It's a terrible habit. You should see someone about it. Why not consult Glaisher? (Henry goes up angrily.) Mr. Jackson, (to his wife) As you please, dear. Still I should like to know what Eustace intends to do when he is well enough. I'm bound to say he looks perfectly well. Eustace, (blandly) Appearances are so decep- tive, father. (Enter Violet l. from house. She has some work in her hands)* Violet. Got back, Mother dear? (hisses her) Enjoyed your lunch ? THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 65 Mrs. Jackson. Very much. It was quite a large party. Violet. (sitting down) What did you talk about ? Mrs. Jackson. About your father's election prin- cipally. They say Parliment may dissolve any day now. What are you making dear? Violet. Handkerchiefs. I promised Eustace I'd work some initials for him. (Goes up stage and sits). Mr. Jackson, (returning doggedly to his sub- ject) Perhaps you will be good enough to tell me what your plans are, Eustace. Eustace. I haven't any plans, father. Mr. Jackson. You haven't any ? Mrs. Jackson. Eustace said the other day he thought he would like to be a doctor. Mr. Jackson. A doctor ! Nonsense. Mrs. Jackson. Well. I only tell you what he said. Eustace. My remark was not intended to be taken literally. I don't seriously propose to enter the medical profession. Mr. Jackson, (irritably) Do you seriously pro- pose anything? Eustace. No, father. I don't know that I do. Mr. Jackson, (meditatively) I might perhaps find you a place in the office. Henry, (down to table) (firmly) No father! / object to that. Violet. Henry ! 66 THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. Henry. Yes, I do. I object to the office being used as a dumping ground for incompetents. Mrs. Jackson, Henry ! Your own brother ! Henry. I can't help that. I don't see why the Firm should be expected to pay a salary to someone who's no earthly use merely because he's my brother. Mr. Jackson. Still we might try him. Henry. My dear father why not face the truth ? You know what Eustace is. We got him into Jenkins' office. He made nothing of it. Then he was in the Gloucester and Wiltshire Bank. No use there. He tried farming. Same result. Finally you gave him a thousand pounds to settle in Australia. That was five years ago and here he is back again without a sixpence. Mrs. Jackson. Eustace has been very unlucky. Henry, (impatiently) What has luck got to do with it? Eustace doesn't work. That's what's the matter with him. Mrs. Jackson. Still if he had another chance. Henry. My dear mother you always believe peo- ple ought to have another chance. It's a little mania with you. Eustace has had dozens of chances. He's made a mess of every one of them. You know that as well as I do. Mr. Jackson. Yes. There's no use hiding it from ourselves. Henry. Not the least — as we can't hide it from anyone else. Mr. Jackson, (after a pause) Well, Eustace, what do you think? (Goes up stage.) Eustace, (airily) I? Oh, I agree with Henry. (lights another cigarette.) THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 67 Mr. Jackson. You what? Eustace. I agree with Henry. I think he's di- agnosed the case with great accuracy. Henry ought to have been a doctor too ! Mr. Jackson. {Getting up angrily and making an oration) Now look here, Eustace. I've had enough of this. You seem to imagine because you've been ill (Eustace grins at Henry) and corne home in rags nothing more in the way of work is to be expected of you. You're to loll about in a hammock smoking cigarettes and taking not the smallest interest in any plans that are suggested for your future. Henry says the reason you've always been a failure is that you don't work and you say you agree with him. Very well. What I have to tell you is I'm not going to have you loafing away your time here. I disapprove of loafing on principle. Both as a public man and as a private man I dis- approve of it. There's far too much of it in Eng- land to-day. That's where the Germans are ahead of us. Young men who ought to be at business or in the professions idle away their time and live on their parents. That won't do for me. I insist upon your getting something to do at once and doing it. I insist upon it. If you don't — (During the last sentence of this impassioned ora- tion Sir John and Lady Faringford and Stella enter r. shoum in by Baines.) Baines. Sir John and Lady Faringford, Miss Faringford. 68 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. {Instant change of front on the part of the whole family, Mr. Jackson stops short in the midst of his eloquence and hurriedly substitutes a glassy smile for the irascible sternness which accompanied his speech. Mrs. Jackson and the others who had listened in uncomfortable silence hastily assume the conventional simper of politeness as they rise to receive their guests. The only person who re- mains quite self-possessed is Eustace though he too smiles slightly as he gets out of hammoch. Eustace, (aside to Henry who comes down) Poor old Governor ! Stemmed in full tide. (General Greetings.) Mrs. Jackson. Dear Lady Faringford. ITow nice of you to come ! Stella my dear, (shakes hands with her and Sir John.) Lady Faringford. (meeting her and then up stage chattering to Violet r.) As Sir John was due at your father's Committee at four, Stella and I thought we would drive him down. Mrs. Jackson. You'll stay and have some tea now you're here of course ! TjAdy Faringford. Thank you. Tea would he very pleasant. Stella. ITow do you do? (shaking hands with IIfnry) And how is the invalid? Getting on well? Henry, (grimly) Excellently. (Henry stands behind her.) Stella. That's right, (shakes hands with Eus- tace. To Henry) He really looks hetter, doesn't he? Dr. Glaisher says it's been a wonderful recovery. THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 69 (Stella gets c. Mr. Jackson stands by her l. Henry down l.) Henry. I suppose he does. Stella. (To Mr. Jackson) How glad you must be to have him home again. Mr. Jackson, (tvith ghastly attempt at effusion) Its a great pleasure of course. Stella. It must be so sad for parents when their children go away from them. But I suppose sons wiU go away sometimes, however hard their parents try to keep them. Won't they? Mr. Jackson. That does 'happen sometimes er unquestionably, (more Irisldy) And anyhow young men can't stay at home always, my dear Miss Farincrt ford. They have their own way to make in the world. . Stella. And so the parents have to let them go. It seems hard. But then when they come back^'it must be delightful. Eustace. It is. Sir John. Hadn't we better be going in, Jack- son ? I sha'n't be able to stay very long. I have to meet my agent at 5.15 sharp to see about some fences. Mr. Jackson, (looks at watch) It's barely four yet. We'd better wait a minute or two. Glaisher will arrive directly and then we can get to work. (Eustace taking advantage of Mr. Jackson's speaJc^ ing to Sir John moves towards Stella c.) Sir John. Ling's advertised to speak at Maytree. I see, to-morrow week. 70 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. Mr. Jackson. Is he? At Maytree? That^s rather out of his country. (Henry goes up.) Sir. John. Yes. He doesn't go down so well in the villages. Thank Heaven agriculture is still con- servative ! They go to his meetings though. Stella. Mr Ling is such a good speaker they say. Eustace. My father is a good speaker too when he's roused, Miss Faringford. You should have heard him ten minutes ago. Sir John. What was he speaking on? Eustace, {airily) The Unemployed. (Mr. Jackson scowls at him. Henry comes down.) Sir John. I congratulate you Jackson. -It isn't all sons who are so appreciative of their fathers' ef- forts. My son never listens to me! (Mr. Jackson smiles a sicMy smile,) Baines. {announcing) Dr. Glaisher. (Eustace and Stella move l. Henry follows them and tries to join them without success.) Mr. Jackson. Ah, here you are doctor. I began to think you weren't coming. Mrs. Jackson, {shaking hands) Good after- noon. Why didn't you bring Mrs. Glaisher? She and I and Lady Faringford could have entertained xh other while you were all at your Committee. THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. 71 Dr. Glaisher. She would have enjoyed it of all things. But I left her at home with the children. Tommy has the whooping cough just now and re- quires a lot of nursing. Mrs. Jackson. Poor little chap. I hope he'll be better soon. Mr. Jackson, {loohing at watch) Well, well. I'm afraid we ought to go in. Come, Sir John. Are you ready, Doctor? Shall I lead the way? (fusses off importantly) Come Henry. Sir John. By all means. Mrs. Jackson, {calling after liim) As you are going would you mind ringing the bell, Samuel, and telling Baines to bring tea out here. Mr. Jackson. Very well, my dear. {Exit Henry ly lower door. Exeunt r. Mr. Jack- son, Sir John, and Doctor. Eustace having lifted up the hammock for Violet and Stella listens politely to them c.) Lady Faringford. {At centre table with Mrs. Jackson) I do hope your husband will be elected, Mrs. Jackson. Mr. Ling has the most dreadful opin- ions about land — and indeed about everything else I'm told. But that is of less importance. Mrs. Jackson. Indeed? Lady Faringford. Oh yes. Only a year ago at a meeting of the Parish Council he made a speech attacking Sir John quite violently about one of his cottages. It was let to young Barrett, quite a res- pectable, hard-working man — who afterwards died of pneumonia. Mr. Ling declared the cottage was damp 72 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. and not fit for anyone to live in. So ridiculous of him ! As if all cottages were not damp. The absurd part of it was that afterwards when Mrs. Barrett was left a widow and Sir John gave her notice be- cause she couldn't pay her rent and he wanted to convert the cottage into pig styes Mr. Ling was equally indignant and seemed to think we ought to find Mrs. Barrett another house! I don't think he can be quite right in his head. (Eustace goes up stage as Baines and footman bring out tea on large tray and put it on table.) Violet, (rising) Shall I make the tea, mother? Mrs. Jackson. If you please, dear. (Stella down r. Eustace stands by her) Eustace. What do you think about damp cot- tages, Miss Faringford ? Do you think they ought to be left standing in order that the laborer may live in them — and have pneumonia. Or be pulled down in order that the laborer may have no where to live at all? (Violet helps Lady Faringford to tea.) Stella (sits) I don't know. I think it's dread- ful there should be damp cottages anywhere. Eustace. That would never do. There must be good cottages and bad cottages in order that the strong may get the good cottages and the weak the bad. THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. 73 Stella. You mean in order that the strong may have the bad cottages and the weak the good. They need them more. Violet. Mother. Eustace. That would be quite unscientific. No, the strong must have the good cottages in order that they may grow stronger, and the weak must have the bad cottages in order that they may die off. Survival of the fittest you know. Stella. How horrible. Eustace. Yes, but how necessary! Lady Faringford. Come over here, Stella. You have the sun on your face there. Stella, (rising univillingly) Very well, mamma. {goes and sits l.) Lady Faringford. By the way, Mrs. Jackson, have you heard about poor Miss Higgs, who used to keiep the school at Little Chedleigh and play the har- monium so badly on Sunda3^s? You remember her? quite a good creature, knew all kinds of subjects and never expected one to take any notice of her. So of course one never did. Well, two years ago (to Eus- tace who offers her cake) No, thank you, . , . an Aunt died and left her a little money and Miss Higgs retired and went to live in Gloucester. One of those unattractive houses near the canal. But she seems to have been quite incapable of managing money. Put it into a gold mine, I believe, or gave it to her solicitor to invest — which comes to the same thing — and lost every penny. Mrs. Jackson. Oh. Poor Miss Higgs. What a sad thing. Lady Faringford. Fortunately she was so af- 74 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. fectcd by her loss that she drowned herself in the canal at the bottom of her garden. Otherwise I'm afraid some sort of a subscription would have had to be got up for her. (Eustace gets another cup of tea from Violet and talces advantage of the move to sit down hy Stella. He at once begins to talh to her in dumb show.) Violet. I liked Miss Higgs very much, Lady Faringford. {From this point to l. c. exit. Lady Faringford Iceeps watching Stella out of the comer of her eye and showing by her manner her annoyance at Eus- tace's marked attentions to her daughter. Mrs. Jackson and Violet are completely unconscious of this by-play.) Lady Faringford, So did quite a number of people, I'm told. Slie was quite a good creature as I said, much superior to the young woman who has succeeded her at Little Chedleigh. (Takes tea from Violet) I wanted them to give the place to my maid Dawkins who is getting rather past her work and really could have taught everything that is neces- sary or wholesome for the lower orders to learn, though I daresay she would have had some difficulty with the harmonium — at first. However they pre- ferred to get down a young person from London with the most elaborate qualifications. So highly educated in fact that I hoar she can't teach at all. Mrs. Jackson. How very awkward. THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 75 Lady Faringford. It is indeed. {Here Eustace sits by Stella. Talces his tea from Violet) Stella ! Stella. Yes, mamma. Lady Faringford. Say good-bye to Mrs. Jackson, my dear. We really must be going, {rising) Mrs. Jackson, {rising also) Shall I let Sir John know you are ready? Lady Faringford. Pray don't trouble. We can pick him up as we go through the house. Good-bye, Mrs. Jackson, {to Eustace, shaking haiids) Good- bye. When do you go back to Australia ? Quite soon I hope. Come Stella. Stella, {shaking hands) Good-bye, Mr. Jackson. {Exeunt Lady Faringford and Stella r. escorted hy Violet. A pause, Eustace sits at centre table indolently.) Eustace. Clever woman that. Mrs. Jackson. Is she, dear? I hadn't noticed. (Mrs. Jackson sits at c. table) Eustace. Yes. We're all of us selfish. But most of us make an effort to conceal the fact. With the result that we are always being asked to do something for somebody and having to invent elaborate ex- cuses for not doing it. And that makes us very un- popular. For everyone hates asking for anything — unless he gets it. But Lady Faringford proclaims her selfishness so openly that no one ever dreams of asking her to do things. It would be tempting Provi- dence. With the result that I expect she's quite a popular woman. 76 THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. Mrs. Jackson. .I^m so glad you like Lady Fat- ingford, dear. Your father has the highest opinion of her. Eustace. The Governor never could see an inch before his nose. Mrs. Jackson. Can't he, dear? He has never said anything about it. Eustace, (affectionately) Dear Mother! (Vio- let returns R.) Seen the Gorgon safely off the premises ? Violet, (laughing) Yes, — and Sir John. Mrs. Jackson. The committee was over then ? Violet. It is now — as Lady Faringford insisted on carrying off the chairman. Here's father. (Enter Mr. Jackson and Henry followed hy Baines with letters on salver. Baines hands letters three to Mr. Jackson, two to Mrs. Jackson, one to Violet, Henry sits.) Baines. Shall I take away, Madam? Mrs. Jackson. Wait a moment, (to Mr. Jack- son) Will you have any tea, Samuel? Mr. Jackson, (opening long envelope and read- ing papers) No. We had some indoors. Mrs. Jackson, (to Baines) Yes, you can take away, (to Mr. Jackson) Did you have a successful meeting? (Baines and footman take away tea) Mr. Jackson. (standing hy table, reading still) Eh ? Oh yes. Mrs. Jackson, (to Henry) What a pity Sir John had to go. Henry, (hy his father) It didn't matter. We'd pretty nearly got through our business. (Mrs. Jack- THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 11 SON opens letter and becomes absoi'hed in its con- tents) Mr. Jackson, (handing papers to Henry) You'd better look through these. They're from Fisher & Thompson. It's about Wenhams' Mill. The sale is next week. Henry, (nods) Very well. Mr. Jackson, (sits c. at tahle) Now, Eustace I want to have a serious talk with you. Eustace. Not again, father ! Mr. Jackson, (puzzled) What do you mean ? Eustace. Couldn't you put it off till to-morrow ? I'm hardly well enough to talk seriously twice in one day. (Violet comes down to cliair r.) Mr. Jackson. Nonsense, Sir. You're perfectly well. Glaisher says there's no longer the slightest cause for anxiety. Eustace. Traitor ! Mr. Jackson. What, Sir ? Eustace. Nothing, father. Mr. Jackson. As I told you before tea I'm not going to have you idling away your time here. The question is what are we to do? Eustace. Just so, father. Mr. Jackson. I mean what are you to do? (pause, no remark from Eustace) Lady Faring- ford said as she went away you ought to go back to Australia. She said it was a thousand pities for any young man not to go to Australia. Mrs. Jackson. Eustace was just saying how clever Lady Faringford was when you came out. H THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. Mr. Jackson. I'm glad to hear it. Well what do you think? Eustace. About Australia? Mr. Jackson. Yes. Eustace. I don't think anything about it. Mr. Jackson. Would you like to go out there again ? Eustace. No, I shouldn't. I've been there once. It was an utter failure. Mr. Jackson. You were a failure, you mean. Eustace. As you please. Anyway it was no good and I had to work as a navvy on the railway. I don't propose to do that again. Henry, (looking up) Other people do well in Australia. Eustace. Other people do well in England. Or rather the same people do well in both. Mr. Jackson, (peevishly) What do you mean? Eustace. Simply that the kind of qualities which make for success in one country make for success in another. It's just as easy to fail in Sydney as in London. I've done it and I know. Mrs. Jackson, (who has just opened her second letter) A letter from Janet. She is going to be at Gloucester next week and would like to come over to see us on Friday. We aren't going out on that day are we Violet? (Mr. Jackson impatient at this interruption opens one of the letters in his hand and glances at it) Violet. No, mother. Mrs. Jackson. That will do then. She'd better come to luncheon, (rises) I'll write and tell her at once before I forget. TtttJ RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 79 Violet. Shall I do it, mother? Mrs. Jackson. No, dear. I can manage it. {Exit R. to house.) Mr. Jackson, (tulio has opened one letter and glanced at it opens second) Well ! (strikes table with clenched fist) Violet. What is it, father? Mr. Jackson. What's the meaning of this I wonder ! Barton must be out of his senses. Violet. Barton ? Mr. Jackson. Yes, Barton, the tailor. Why does he send me in a bill like this? (Henry conies down L. of Mr. Jackson) Twenty-five pounds. And I've had nothing from him since Easter. Listen to this. One lounge suit four guineas, one dress suit eight guineas, one flannel suit three pounds ten, an- other lounge suit four guineas. One frock coat and waistcoat four guineas, one pair of trousers one guinea. Total twenty-five pounds eleven. Eustace. They're mine, father. Mr. Jackson. What, sir ! Eustace. Some clothes I ordered. I told him to send the bill to you. That's all right, isn't it. Mr. Jackson. (exploding) All right! Cer- tainly not, sir. It's very far from all right. It's a great liberty. Eustace. My dear father the bill must be sent in to somebody. Mr. Jackson. And why not to you, pray? Eustace. What would be the good of that father? I've nothing to pay it with. go THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. Mr. Jackson, (fuming) Then you shouldn't have ordered the things. Eustace. But I must wear something. I couldn't go on wearing Henry's things indefinitely. It's hard on him! (Henry snorts) My dear Henry! (Henry goes up.) Mr. Jackson. But what's become of all the clothes you had? You must have had some clothes. Eustace, (shrugs) They're in London — and in rags. Mr. Jackson. Now look here, Eustace. I'm not going to have this. I'm not going to have a son of mine running up bills here. Eustace. All right, father. I'm quite willing to pay for the things — if you give me the money. Mr. Jackson. I shall not give you the money, sir. If you want money you must earn it. Eustace. That doesn't take us very far. Mr. Jackson. You'll disgrace me. (Mr. Jackson rises and invoke: the heavens. Henry goes up r.) That's what will happen. I insist on your paying Barton and giving me your word of honor never to get anything on credit here again, (thrusts hill into Eustace's hand, then tramps about angrily) Eustace. I've no objection. I don't run up tailors' bills for pleasure. I'd just as soon pay ready money as you would. Only I haven't got it. Give me twenty pounds — No twenty-five pounds eleven — and I'll pay Barton to-morrow. THE RETURN OF THS t>RODtGAL. gl Mr. Jackson. I decline to give you money. I decline. Your request is impudent. Eustace. Let's keep our tempers, father. Mr. Jackson. What, sir? Eustace. I suggested we should keep our tempers. That's all. Mr. Jackson. This is intolerable. I disown you, sir. I disown you. Violet. Father ! Mr. Jackson. Be silent, Violet, (to Eustace) I'll have nothing more to do with you. I'll pay this debt to Barton and any others you may have incurred since you came back. After that I've done with you. Leave my house at once. Eustace, (rising, very calm and first putting chair in its place then speaking with ominous dis- tinctness) Very well, father. I'll go if you wish it. (movement for Mr. Jackson) But I warn you if I do go it will be to the nearest workhouse ! Mr. Jackson, (fuming) That's your affair. It has nothing to do with me. (turns away) Eustace. I question that. It rather knocks your election prospects on the head, I fancy. Mr. Jackson, (swinging round) Eh? What? Eustace. You don't seriously suppose if I do this you'll be returned for Parliament? If you do you don't know the British Electorate. (Henry walks towards l.) This is going to be a scandal, a scandal worth five hundred votes to the other side. And the last man's majority was only fifty. Oh no, my dear father, if it comes out that the son of the rich Con- servative Candidate is in the local workhouse, good- bye to your chances in this constituency. I S2 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. ^a Henry. You wouldn't dare! Eustace. Dare? jSTonsense. What have I to lose? Henry. But this is infamous. It's blackmail. Eustace. Call it what you like. It's what I propose to do if you force me to it. Violet. Eustace ! You couldn't be so wicked ! Eustace. My dear Vi have I any choice? Here am I absolutely penniless. The Governor flies into a rage because I order some clothes from his tailor and turns me into the street. What am I to do? I've no profession, no business I can turn my hand to. I might take to manual labor, break stones on the road. But that would only bring equal discredit on this highly respectable family. In England sons of wealthy cloth manufacturers don't work with their hands. Besides I don't like work. So there's nothing left but to beg. If I beg in the street the police will take me up. Therefore I must beg from my relations. If they refuse me I must go on the Parish. Henry. Father this is monstrous. I wouldn't submit to it if I were you. If he wants to prevent your election let him. I advise you to refuse, (down hy table) Eustace. All right. But it knocks your pros- pects on the head too my dear Henry, social advance- ment and love's young dream you know. Miss Far- ingford won't marry you if this happens. Her mother won't let her. You're not so rich as all that. And if her mother would, Stella wouldn't. Stella rather likes me. In fact I think she likes me better THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 8?. than she docs you at present. I'm not absolutely cer- tain she wouldn't marry me if I asked her. Henry. Lady Faringfoid would forbid her. Eustace. Perhaps we shouldn't consult her. Anyhow if you leave me to eat skilly in Chedleigh Workhouse, Stella won't accept you. I lay you ten to one on it. (a pause. Gong rings) Well, what do you say? (Long silence, Mr. Jackson obviously not hnowing what to do. Henry equaVy uncom- fortahJe) Kothing? (still silence) You Henry, you're full of resource. What do you think? (still silence. With a shrug.) Well first gong's gone. I shall go and dress for dinner, (strolls off r.) (Henry snorts and goes up stage.) Curtain. 84 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. ACT IV. Scene: — The drawing room at Chedleigh as in Act I. Occasional table near sofa. When Curtain rises Mrs. Jackson and Violet are discovered. Violet is playing softly at piano, Mrs. Jackson sitting by fireplace nodding over a piece of work of some kind. Presently enter Eustace l. Violet stops playing, closes piano and comes down, later takes up handkerchief she is working for Eustace. Eustace strolls to his mother. Mrs. Jackson, (waking up, drowsily) Is that you, Eustace? Where's your father? Eustace. In the library with Henry. Mrs. Jackson. Talking business? Eustace, (nods) Yes. Mrs. Jackson. Can you see the time, Vi? Violet. (sitting by fireplace) Nearly ten, mother dear. Mrs. Jackson. So late ! They must be discussing something very important. Eustace, (grimly) They are. . Mrs. Jackson. Have they been long in the library? Eustace. They went directly you and Vi left the table, THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 85 Mrs. Jackson- And you've been alone in the dining-room all that time? Why didn't you come in to us? Eustace. I thought they might want to consult me. Mrs. Jackson. About business? I'm so glad. I'm sure you would be most useful in the business if you tried, though Henry doesn't think so. Eustace. Are you, mother? Mrs. Jackson. Of course. Why not? Henry is. And you always learnt your lessons far quicker than Henry when you were a boy. Eustace, (laying hand on her shoulder) Flat- terer ! Mrs. Jackson, (putting worh into worh hasTcet) Well, I don't think I'll stay up any longer. (Rises) And I do hope Henry won't keep your father up too late. It can't be good for him. (kisses Eustace) Good-night, dear. Sleep well. Are you coming, Violet? (Usses her) Violet. Directly, mother. (Eustace holds door open for her to go out. Then comes slowhj down and sits in chair hy Violet at centre table.) Eustace. Dear old mother. She's not clever, but for real goodness of heart I don't know her equal. Violet, (impatiently) Clever! I'm sick of cleverness. What's the good of it? You're clever. What has it done for you ? Eustace. Kept me out of prison. That's always . something. 86 THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. (Violet makes gesture of protest.) Oh yes, it has. There have been times when I was so hard up I felt I would do anything, anything, just for a square meal. If I had been a stupid man I should have done it. I should have robbed a till or forged a cheque, and that would have been the end of me. Fortunately I'd brains enough to realise that that kind of thing always gets found out. So here I am, still a blameless member of society. (Violet says nothing, hut goes on working. Pause.) The mater hasn't been told? Violet. About what happened before dinner? No. Eustace. I'm glad of that. Violet. Why ? Eustace. My dear Vi, I'm not absolutely in- human. Because I'm fond of her, of course, and don't like giving her pain. Violet. She'll have to know sooner or later. Eustace. Then I'd rather it was later, in fact when I'm not here. If anybody has got to suffer on my account, I'd rather not see it. Violet. And you call Lady Faringford selfish ! Eustace, (carelessly) Yes. It's a quality I par- ticularly dislike — in others, (pause) Violet. I can't understand you. As a boy you were so different. You were kind and affectionate and thoughtful for others. Eustace, (shrugs) I dare say. Violet. And now — ! Think what you have made cf your life! You had good abilities. You I THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. 87 might have done almost anything if you had only tried. You might have been a successful, honorable man with an assured position and a record you could be proud of. You miight. . . . Eustace, (putting his fingers in his ears) Stop, Vi. Stop. I tell you. I won't listen to you. Violet, (surprised) Why not? Eustace, (doggedly) Because I won't. All that is over. What's past is past. I have to live my life now. Do you suppose it would make it any easier for me to grizzle over wasted opportunities? No! As each year passes I turn over the page and forget it. Violet, (luondering) And do yon never look back ? Eustace, (with a slight shiver) Never! If I did I should have drowned myself long ago. Violet, (with horror) Eustace! Eustace. Oh, my dear Vi, it's all very well for you to preach, but you don't understand. It's easy enough for you living comfortably here at home working for your bazaars and visiting your old wo- men. Your life slips away in a quiet round of small duties, paying calls with the mater, pouring out the governor's coffee. One day Just like another. You've no anxieties, no temptations. The lines have fallen to you in pleasant places. And you think you can sit in judgment on me ! Violet, (quietly) You think my life happier than yours then? Eustace. Isn't it? Violet. No. Your life is your own. You can do as you please with it, use it or waste it as you think 8S THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. best. You are free. I am not. You think, because I stay quietly at home doing the duty that lies near- est me and not crying out against fate, therefore I've nothing more to wish for! Would you be happy, do you suppose, if you were in my case? 1 live here down in Chedleigh from year's end to year's end. Mother never leaves home. She doesn't care to pay visits. So I cannot either. I may sometimes get away for a few days, a week, perhaps, but very seldom. And as mother grows older I shall go less. Soon people will give up asking me when they find T al- ways refuse. And so I shall be left here alone with no friends, no real companionship, merely one of the family obliged to know the people they know, visit the people they visit, not a grown woman with in- terests of her own and a life to order as she pleases. Eustace. But youll marry — Violet. Marry ! What chance have I of marry- ing now? When we hadn't so much money and Henry and father weren't so set on taking a jiosition in tlie County, tliere was some chance for me. Now there is none. It's all very well for Henry. He is a partner in the firm. He will be a very rich man. He can marry Stella Faringford. Oh, we are to be great people! But you don't find Sir John Faring- ford's son proposing to 7nc! No! He wants a girl of his own class or else an heiress, not a manufac- turer's daughter with a few thousand pounds. So the great peojdc won't marry me and I mustn't marry the little })eople. Father wouldn't like it. He hardly lets mother ask them to the house now-a-days. And so the years go by and my youth with them, and I know it will be like this always, always. THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 89 Eustace. Foor old Vi ! And 1 thought you were quite contented with your bazaars and your old v/omen. Why don't you speak to the mater? Violet, {resuming her work) What's the use? Mother wouldn't understand. She married when she was twenty-one. Slie doesn't know what it is for a girl to go on living at home long after she's grown up and ought to have a house of her own. So I stay on here knitting socks for old Allen and working yovr handkerchiefs and here I shall stay till mother and father are both dead. . . . And then it will be too late. Eustace. Poor old Vi ! {a pause) Do you know you make me feel rather mean? Henry and the Governor I can stand up to. They're very much like me. We belong to the predatory type. Only they're more successful tlian I am. They live on their work-people. I propose to live on them. We're birds of a feather. But you're different. I suppose you get it from the mater. Violet. Why are you so bitter against your father ? Eustace. Am I? Violet. Yes. Just now. And this afternoon. Eustace, (shrugs) Oh that— ! Well the fact is I wanted to bring things to a head. I feel I can't stay here. I must get away. Violet. W^hy ? Eustace. For lots of reasons. I can't stand this place— I've outgrown it I suppose. (Pause) And then there's Stella. . . . Violet. Stella ? Eustace. Yes. If I were here much longer I 90 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. might be falling in love vviili Stella, (tvalls over to Violet and stands hy her) And that wouldn't be fair to Henry. After all he was first in the field. And it wouldn't be fair to her either. I'm not fit to marry a girl like that. No. I must get away. Violet. Poor Eustace. Eustace. Oh, you needn't pity me. I shall get along somehow. My life hasn't been successful. It hasn't even been honorable. But it's been devilish interesting, {haclc at c.) {Enter Mr. Jackson and Henry l.) Mr. Jackson. You here, Vi? I thought you'd have gone to bed. Your mother went long ago, I expect ? Violet. Only a few minutes. Mr. Jackson. Well run away now, dear. It's late. Violet. Very well, father. {gathers up her things and rises) Good-night. {kisses him) Good night, Henry. Good-night, Eustace. Eustace, {taking her hand) Good-night, Vi. And good-bye. {holds open door for her) {She kisses him and exit l.) {While Violet has been getting her things together, Mr. Jackson has been showing obvious signs of nervous impatience. Even Henry has fidgeted. When Violet has gone Eustace sits on settee l.) Eustace. Well? Mr. Jackson. Ahem ! We have been in consulta- THfi ttETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. 91 tion, your brother and I, as to the right course to adopt with regard to you. Eustace, {nods) So I supposed. (Henry sits in chair at top table.) Mr. Jackson. After the extraordinary and un- dutiful attitude you took up this afternoon, I might naturally have declined all further relations with you. But .... Eustace, {matter of fact) But as that course might prove almost as disagreeable for yourself as it would for me, you naturally thought better of it. Let's get on. Mr. Jackson, {rearing under this touch of the spur, hut mastering himself) I might point out to you, that we, your mother and I, have never failed in our duty by you. We have been indulgent parents. You were sent to a first-rate school. Nothing was spared that could make you a prosperous and success- ful man. But I won't speak of that. Eustace, {drily) Thanks, father. Mr. Jackson, {running on) I might point out that we have given you a score of good chances for establishing yourself in a satisfactory position and you have failed to profit by them, I might remind you that since you returned to this roof Eustace. {impatiently) My dear father, I thought you were going to leave that part out ? And I do wish you wouldn't begin talking about your roof. When people refer to their roof, I always know they're going to suggest something quite unpractical. In ordinary times they don't soar above the ceiling. 92 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. But in moments of fervor off goes the roof! Let's come to the point. Mr. Jackson, (collecting himself again) I will do so at once. Your brother and I feel that little as you have deserved this consideration at my hands and wholly as you have forfeited all claim to further assistance both by your past failures and by your conduct this afternoon you should yet be given one more chance. (During the latter part of this speech and the begin- fling of the next, Eustace insensibly begins to beat time to his father's impassioned antithesis.) Eustace. Come, that's satisfactory. Mr. Jackson. Five years ago when, after re- peated failures on your part, after paying your debts more than once and finding you openings again and again, I sent you to Australia, I gave you a thousand pounds to make a career for yourself. I told you that was the last sum of money you would have from me during my lifetime. What may or may not come to you after my death is another matter. And I gave it you on the express stipulation that if you lost or squandered it you were not to write for more. Eustace. I kept that stipulation. Mr. Jackson. That is so. I now propose to do again what I did five years ago. I propose to send you ])ack to Australia with a thousand pounds. Henry, (looking up from book, tvhich he has been appearing to read) To be paid to you after your arrival there. Mr. Jackson. Quite so. I will send the thousa^d THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 93 pounds, less the cost of your passage, to an agent to be paid to you on your landing. In return you are to promise not to come back to this country with- out my express permission. I think you will agree with me that the course I am taking is a kinder one than you deserve. Few fathers would do as much. I might have named a smaller sum. But I prefer to err on the generous side. Eustace, (nodding) Quite so. And what do you propose that I should do with a thousand pounds ? Mr. Jackson. That is for you to decide. You might start in business. Eustace. I've tried that. Mr. Jackson. Sheep farming. Eustace. I've tried that. Mr. Jackson. Gold mining. Eustace. I've tried that. Mr. Jackson. Well, well, any line which you think offers you a favorable opening. Eustace, (insinuatingly) And which line is that? Mr. Jackson, (irritably) I don't know. Eustace. No more do I. (pause) No, father, it would be absurd for me to accept your offer, because it isn't practical. It would only be throwing your money away. It would do me no good, and cause you hearfelt distress. Mr. Jackson. Nonsense. Other young fellows go out to Australia with less than a thousand pounds and make fortunes, far less. Why shouldn't you ? Eustace. Why indeed? However we must keep to the point. They make fortunes. I don't. 94 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. Mr. Jackson, (exasperated) In fact, theyVe active and energetic, you're useless and worthless. Where other people by thrift and enterprise and steady application make money, you only lose it. Eustace. Exactly. I lose it. And doubtless for lack of the qualities you mention. What then? Granted I am all you say how does that help us? Here I am, alive, and requiring food at the customary intervals. Who is going to give it me? (Henry snorts.) Eeally, Henry! Mr. Jackson, (hothj) That is to say you want to go through life sponging on your family instead of working for your living like an honest man. Eustace, (getting annoyed, rises and goes across to his father) Look here, father, hadn't we better drop all that stuff about umnting to sponge on one's family and the rest of it. Nobody wants to sponge on other people. The idea's preposterous. We all tvant to be prosperous and highly respected members of Society like you and Henry, with more money than we know what to do with, with a seat in Parliament and a wife out of the Baronetage. That's what we want! And if we haven't the luck or the brains or the energy to get it, you needn't call us names. You don't suppose I prefer losing money to making it, do you? You don't suppose if I had my choice I should drift about the world adding up accounts in a filthy Hong Kong bank or playing steward on a filthier ocean liner? You can't be so ridiculous. (Henry comes down) I'm good for nothing as you say. I've no push, no initiative, no staying power. I THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. 95 shall never be anything but a failure. But don't imagine I like it! You seem to think you've a terrible grievance because I'm a ne'er-do-well and come to you for money^ but the real grievance is mine. Henry, (tartly) If 3^ou don't like coming on your family for money, you needn't do it. (he then comes down r.) Eustace, {impatiently) It's not what I do but what I am that is the difficulty. What does it matter what one does? It's done and then it's over and one can forget it. The real tragedy is what one is. Be- cause one can't escape from that. It's always there, the bundle of passions, weaknesses, stupidities, that one calls character, waiting to trip one up. Look at the Governor, that pillar of rectitude and business ability ! Do 3^ou suppose li e could be like me if he tried. Of course not. Nor could I be like him. Mr. Jackson. Have you no will? Eustace. No. Have you ? Have we any of us ? {sits) Aren't \yq just the creatures of our upbring- ing, of circumstance, of our physical constitution? We are launched on the stream at our birth. Some of us can swim against the current. Those who can't, it washes away. {There is a pause. Henry looTcs sullen, Mr. Jack- son puzzled. Eustace ivho has grown rather heated, regains his composure.) Mr. Jackson. Well, what's to be done with you ? Eustace. I'm afraid you'll have to keep me. You're my father, you know. You've brought into the world a worthless and useless human being. I think those were your adjectives ? You're respo: jible. 96 THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. Mr. Jackson. Is that any reason why I should support you? Eustace. No, father. Frankly I don't think it is. I think your sensible course would be to put me quietly out of this wicked world or hire someone else to do so. I'm a bad egg. I shall never hatch into anything that will do you the smallest credit. Your sensible course is to destroy me. But you daren't do that. Social convention won't allow you; the law would make a fuss. Indeed the law won't even allow me to put an end to myself and save you the trouble. I should be rescued, very wet and draggled, from the muddy waters of the Ched by the solitary police- man, who seems to have nothing else to do, but to stand about rescuing jToople who had much better be left to drown. I should be haled before the Magis- trates — you're a magistrate yourself now, father. YouM be there — T should be given a solemn lecture and then " handed over to my friends " — that's you again, father — who would undertake to look after me in future. And I only hope you would be able to con- ceal your annoyance at my rescue from the prying eyes of your brother justices! Mr. Jackson. You've no right to say that. You've no right to suggest that I wish you were dead. Eustace, {genialhj) Of course you do. You want me to go to Australia where you'll never hear of me again, where in fact I shall be dead to you. What's the difference? {a pause) Mr. Jackson. Well, I won't argue with you. The question is what do you propose ? Eustace, (after a moment's thought) In the THOBJ RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 97 circumstances, I think your wisest course will be to make me an allowance, say three hundred a year, paid quarterly. Then I'll go away and live quietly in London and you'll be rid of me. Mr. Jackson, (angry again) I refuse, sir, I re- fuse absolutely. The suggestion is utterly shameless. Eustace. I dare say. But it's perfectly sensible. I appeal to Henry. Henry. Father, I think you'd better do as he says. If you gave him a thousand pounds as we in- tended, he'd only lose it. Better make him an al- lowance. Then you can always stop it if he doesn't behave himself. It's a shameless proposal, as you say, but it's practical. Eustace. Bravo, Henry, I always said you had brains. That's exactly it. Shameless but eminently practical. Mr. Jackson, {grumbling) What I can't see is why I should allow you this money. (Henry turns away annoyed and sits.) Here's Henry who's perfectly satisfactory, and has never caused me a moment's anxiety. I don't give him money. Whereas you who have never caused me anything else expect me to keep you for the remainder of your life. Eustace. It is unreasonable, isn't it. But we live in a humanitarian age. We coddle the sick and we keep alive the imbecile. We shall soon come to pensioning the idle and the dissolute. You're only a little in advance of the times. England is covered with hospitals for the incurably diseased and asylums for the incurably mad. If a tenth of the money were spent on putting such people out of the world and the 9^ THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. rest were used in preventing the healthy people from falling sick, and the sane people from starving, we should be a wholesomer nation. Mr. Jackson, (after a pause) Well, if Henry thinks so I suppose I must give you an allowance. But I won't go beyond two hundred. Eustace. I can't keep out of debt on two hun- dred. Mr. Jackson. Two hundred and fifty then. Eustace, (persuasively) Three hundred. Mr. Jackson. Two hundred and fifty. Not a penny more, (breaking out again) Why, I'd starve before I consented to sponge on my family as you are doing. Eustace, (quietly) Ah. You evidently don't know much about starving, father I If you write a cheque for my first quarter now I can catch the 11.15 tip. Mr. Jackson. You can't go to-night. You're not packed. And you'll want to say good-bye to your mother. Eustace. I think not. As I'm to go, it had bet- ter be as suddenly as I came. It saves such a lot of explanations. You can send my things after me to London. Mr. Jackson. (a pause) Very well, (on Eustace's l.) I'll go and write you a cheque. (Exit R.) (A long pause.) Henry, (bitterly) Well, you've got what you Wanted. THE RETURN OF THE PRODICAL. 99 Eustace, (airily) Thanks to you, my dear fel- lov/. Henry. What a sordid plot it has been ! To make your way into this house by a trick with the deliber- ate intention of blackmailing your own father. Eustace. You're wrong. The blackmail as you call it was an afterthought. When I made my way into this house in the way you so accurately describe my designs went no further than getting some decent food and a house over my head for a few days. But when I got here and found you all so infernally pros- perous, the G(Tvernor flinging money about over get- ting into Parliament, you intending to marry Far- ingford's daughter, I thought I'd put in for a share of the plunder. Henry, (disgusted) Well, you've succeeded, suc- ceeded because you've neither honor nor conscience about you. Eustace. No. I've succeeded because you're a snob and the Governor's a snob, and that put you both in my power. I might have been as poor and as unscrupulous as you please without getting a half- penny out of either of you. Luckily the Governor's political ambitions and your social ambitions gave me the pull over you and I used it. Henry. (rises and goes towards Eustace) Faugh! — (fiercely) You understand of course that if you are to have this allowance it is on the express condition that you give up all thoughts of Miss Far- ingford, give them up absolutely. Eustace. By all means. What should I be about, marrying a penniless girl like Stella, 166 THE RETURN OP THE PRODIGAL. Henry. There's nothing you won't do for money ! Even to giving up the girl you pretend to care for. Eustace, (shrugs) I daresay. Besides what would Stella be about marrying a penniless devil like me ? (Another silence.) Henry, (hrealcing out) And the best of it is if this story ever gets about, you'll get all the sympathy ! Ne'er-do-wells always do. The Governor and I would be despised as a couple of stony-hearted wretches with no bowels of compassion who grudge9 money to a necessitous brother while you would be called a light- hearted devil-may-care chap who is nobody's enemy but his own ! Eustace. Well, I think I'd change places with you. After all, you're pretty comfortable here. And you'll marry Stella, damn you. (Henry is silent. Pause.) (Enter Mr. Jackson with cheque in his hand.) Mr. Jackson. Here's your cheque. Eustace, (looks at it.) Fours into two hundred and fifty. Sixty-two pounds, ten. Thanks, father. (holds out hand) Good-bye. (Mr. Jackson hesitates.) You may as well. After all I'm your son. And if I'm a sweep, it's your fault ! THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL. 101 Mr. Jackson, {takes his hand) Good-bye. {hes- itates — moves to -fireplace) (Eustace turns to go.) You may write occasionally, just to let us know how you are. Eustace. {smiles grimly. Then hands hach cheque) Make it three hundred, father — and I won't write. (Mr. Jackson is about to protest angrily, then recognising the uselessness of that proceeding, says nothing, hut waves cheque contemptuously away. Eustace still smiling, pockets it.) No ? Well have it your own way. Good-bye. Good- bye, Henry, {nods to him without offering to shake hands) {Exit L. Mr. Jackson turns toward fireplace and leans head on mantelpiece with a sigh.) Curtain. (Frt'nch\<: Standard Drama Continued from zd page of Cover.) VOL. XLI. VOL. XLIV. VOL. XLVIL VOL. L. 821 The Pirate's Utiry 345 Drunkard's Doom 369 Saratoga 393 Fine Feathers 3'2'i The Chartoal Kuruer ;!46 Chimney Corner 3-y Never Too I,ale to Mend 394 Prompter's Box 3S5 Iron Master ■in AJelgitha j47 Fifteii! Years of R Drunk- 371 Lily of France 3--'4 Sf nor Valiente .m JNo Thoroughfare | ard's ■■'A'i Peep 0' Day |_Life 372 Led Astray 396 Engaged 3'25 Forest Rose :i7.i Henry V 97 Pygmalion 4 Oalatoa 3SS Duke's Daughter :f50 Everybody's Friend 374 I'nequal Match 398 Leah 3i'1 Camilla's Husband :iftl Gen. Grant o7.', May or Dolly's Delusion :i99 Scrap of Pjiper 82b Pur* f, Temperance Doctor 380 Caste 404 Ruined by Drink 333 Pirate of the Islea ;i5" Aunt Dinah 381 School 405 Dreams 334 Kanohon .i.W Widow Freeheart 382 Home 406 M. P. 335 Little Barefcot ■.m Fron Frou 383 David Garrick 407 War 336 Wild Irish Giri libt' Long Strike ;i84 Ours 408 Birth VOL. XLHL VOL. XLVL VOL. XLIX. VOL. LU. 337 Pearl of Savoy ■Ml Lancers :i8Fi Social Glass 409 Nightingale 338 Dead Heart Mi Lurille :W6 Daniel Druce 410 Progress 339 Ten Nights in a Bar-room 34U DunibBoyofManohester 3b3 Randall's Thumb :;87 Tw.> Rnse-s 411 Play 364 Wicked World :!88 Adrieniie 412 Miiinight Charge 341 Belphegoi-theJVlounteb'k 365 Two Orphans ,i89 The Bidis 413 Confidential Clerk 3-12 Cricket on ths Hearth :;66 Colleen Bawn .m Uncle 414 Snowball 343 Printer's Devi! 367 'Twixt Axe and Crown .',91 Courtship 415 Our Regiment 344 Meg's Diversiou :-iSS Lady Clancarthy 392 Not Such a Fool 416 Married for Money Hamlet in Three Act* Guttle & Gulpit FRENCH'S INTERNATIONAL COPYRIGHTED EDITION OF THE WORKS OF THE BEST AUTHORS. The following very successful plays have just been issued at 25 cents per copy. A PAIR OF SPECTACLES. Comedy in 3 Acts by Sydney Grundy, author of "Sowing the Wind," Ac. 8 male, 3 female characters. A FOOL'S PARADISE. An original play In 3 Acts by Sydnky Grunty, author of '-Sowing the Wind,'" Ac. 5 male, 4 female characters. THE SILVER SHIELD. An original comedy in ,^ Act? by Sydnky Grundy, author of ''Sowing the Wind," Ac. 5 male, 3 female characters. THE GLASS OP FASHION". cdy in 4 Acts by Sypnkv Grundy, the Wind," Ac. 6 m male characters. iginal com- " " Sowing Farcical comedy in 3 Acts by J. NviLLE Fenn. 6 male, 4 female THE BALLOON. H. Darni.ky and M characters. MISS CLEOPATRA. Farce in 3 Acts by Arthur Shiklky. 7 male, 3 female characters. SIX PERSONS. Comedy Act by I. Zanowill. 1 male, 1 female character. FASHIONABLE INTELLIGENCE. Comedi- etta in I Act by Percy FKNUiLL. 1 male, 1 female character. HIGHLAND LEGACY. Comedy in 1 Act by Brandon Thomas, author of "Charley's Aunt." 5 male, 2 female characters. Contents of Catalogue which is sent Free. Amatenr Drama Amateur Operas Articles Needed by Amateurs Art of Scene Painting Baker's Reading Club Beards, W^hiskers, Mustaches, etc. Bound Sets of Plavs Bulwer Lytton's Plays Burlesque Dramas Burnt Cork Cabman's Striry Carnival of Authors Charade Plavs Children's Plays Comic Dramas for Male Characters only Costume Books Crape FLair Cumberland Edition Darkev Dramas T)r.amas for Boys Drawing-room Monologues Elocution, Reciters and Speakers Etrtopian Dramas Evening's Entertainment Fairy and Home Plays French's Costumes French's Editions French's Italian Operas French's Parlor Comedies French's Standard and Minor Drama French's Standard and Minor Drama, bound French's Scenes for Amateurs Frobisher's Popular Recitals Grand Army Dramas Guide Books for Amateurs Guide to Selecting Pliiys Hints on Costumes Home Plavs for Ladies Irish Plays Irving's Plays .luvenile Plays Make-Up Book Make-Up Box Mock trial Mrs. Jarley's Wax Works New Plays New Recitation Books Nigtrer Jokes and Stump Speeches Parlor Magic Parlor Pantomimes Pieces of Pleasantry Poems for Recitations Plays for Male Characters »a!y Round Games Scenery Scriptural and Historical Dramaa Sessation Dramas Serio-Comic Dramas Shadow Pantomimes Shakespeare's Plays for Amateurs .Shakespeare'.* Plays Stanley's Dwarfs Spirit GiMii Tableaux Vivants Talma Actor's Art Temperance Plays Vocal Music of Shakespeare's Plays Webster's Acting Editioa Wigs, etci (French's Minor Drama Continued from 4th pa<^e of Cover.) -r:L. XLt. 321 Adventures of a Lov« 322 Oft Child [Lettei 323 Court Cards 324 Cox and Box 325 Forty Winks 396 Wonderful Woman 397 Curious Case 328 Tweedleton'» Tail Coat VOL. XLIL .329 As Like as Two Peas 330 Presumptive Evidence 331 Happy Band 332 Pinafore 333 Mock Trial 3;J4 My Uncle's Will 335 Happy Pair 336 My T^irn Next VOL. XLIH. 337 Sun.set 338 For Haifa Millioa 339 C'tble Car 340 Early Bird .341 Alumni Play 342 Show of Hands 343 Barbara 344 Who's Who VOL. XLIV. :?46 W^ho's To Win Hia ■U6 Which It Which 347 Cup of Tea .348 Sarah's Young Maa 349 Hearts 350 In Honor Bound (Law 351 Freexing a Mothar-la- J52 My Lord iu LUery SAMUEL FRENCH, 26 West 22d St., New York City. ^ff" N^Y »nd Explicit Descriptive Catalogue Mailed Free on Request. FRENCH'S MINOR DRAMA. Price 1 5 Cents each.-E LIBRPRY OF CONGRESS [per : Pep VOL. I. 1 Tke Irish Attorney 2 Boot* !it tlie Swan 3 How U> Pay the Rent 4 The I»an of a LoYer 6 The Uuiid Shot 6 His Ijist l.e^ 7 The IriYisible Prince 8 The UoMeu Kaniier VOL. U. 9 Pride or the Market 10 Used Up 11 The Irish Tat-.r 12 The Barrack R'om 13 Luke the La 'orer 14 Beauty ami the Beast 15 St. Piitriik'» h:ve 16 Captain of the Watch VOU III 17 The Se.. ret 18 White Horse of the 19 The Jacobite 20 The Bottle 21 Box anil Cor 22 Baiiihoozli.ifT 23 Widow's Victiia 24 Robert iVl icaire VOU IV. 25 Sirret Service 28 OriiMbiis 27 Irish Li .n 28 Miin Lover OB Matri-n >ny 07 In and Ontof Pl:ice 108 I Dine with .My .Viother 09 Hi-a-wa-tha 10 Andv Blake 11 Love" in '76 J'''"' Il2Ro:ivance under Diracul- VOL. XV. 13 One Coat f.r J Suits 114 A Decided Case 115D:inghter [no ritv 16 No; or, tjie Glori .us Mi- 17 Coroner's Inquisition 18 L)ve in Hu iiole Liie 19 Family .lars 120 t'ersonation VOL. XVI. 121 Children in tlie Wiod 22 Winning a Huiband 123 Dav After the Fair 24 Maki Your Wills 25 Rendezvous 126 My Wife's Husbtnd 27 Monsieur Tonson 28 Illustrious Stranger VOL. XV(I. 29 Mi3chief-\laking[Mi ties 30 A Live Woman in the 131 The Corsair l32Shylock 33 Spoiled Child 34 Kvil Eye 35 Nothing to V,irse 36 Wanted a Widow VOL. XVTII. 137 Lottery Ticket 138 Fortune's Frolic 139 Ij hi Jaalonst 140 Married Bachelor Ul Husband at Sight 142 Irishman in London 143 Ani na! Magnetism 144 Highways and By-W ay VOL. XIX. 145 Columbus 146 Harlequin Bluebeard 147 Ladies at Home 148 Phenomenon in s Smock Frock 149 Comedy and Tragedy 150 Opposite Meighbors 151 Dutchman's Ghost 152 Persecuted Ontchman VOL. XX. y 153 Musard Ball 1.S4 Great Tragic Revival 155 High Low Jack A (Janie 156 A Gentleman from I 157 Tom and Jerry [land 158 Village Lawyer 159 Captain's not A-mIss 60 Amateurs and Actors 014 432 997 1 [Puil Icing 169 Yankee Peduler 170 Hir.iin Hireout 171 Double-Bedded Room 172 The Drama Defended 173 Vermont Wool Dealer 174 Khenezer Venture [ter 175 Principles from Cbarac- 176 Lady of the Lake (Trav> VOL. XX 11 1. 177 Mad Dogs 178 Birney tlie Baron 179 Swiss Swains 180 Bachelor's Bedroom IHI A Rolmd for an Oliver 182 More Blvnders than One 183 Dumb Belle lh4 Limerick boy VOL. XXIV. 185 Nature and Philosophy 186 Teddy the Tiler 187 Sueilre Bridegroom 188 Matteo Falcone 189 Jenny Lind 190 Two Buzzards 191 Happy Man 192 Betsy Baker VOL. XXV. 193 No, 1 Round the Corner 194 Teddy Roe 195 /Object of Int-rest 1 '6 My Fellow Clerk 19" B«ngal Tiger 1 <8 Laughing Hvena 199 The Victor Vanquished •jOO Our Wife VOL. XXVI. 201 My Husband's Mirror 202 Yankee Land 203 Norah Creina 204 Good for Nothing 'J05 The First Night 206 The Kton Boy •J07 Wandering Minstrel 208 Wanted, 1000 Milliners VOL. XXVII. 209 Poor Pilcoddy 210 The Mummy [Glasses 211 Don't Forg"t your Opera 212 Love in Livery 213 Anthony and Cleop atra vUTrying It On 2)5 Stage Struck Vankee 216 Young Wife A Old Um- brella VOL. xxvrn. 217 Crinoline 218 A Family Failing 219 Adopted'f'hild 220 Turned H^ads ■.'21 A Match in the DarV 222 Advice to Husbands 223 Siamese Twin? 224 Sent to the Tower VOL. XXIX. •'25 Somebodv Flse 2 6 lAdies' B"attle 927 frt of Acting 228 The Ladv of the Lions 229 The Rights of Man 2.30 Mv Husband's Ghost 231 Two Can Play at that Game 2.32 Fighting by Proxy VOL. XXX. 233 Unprotected Female 234 Pet of the Petticoats 235 Forty and Fifty [book 236 Who Stole the Pocket- 237 My Son Diana [sion 2.38 Unwarrantable Intru- 2.39 Mr. and Mrs. White 240 A Quiet Family (French's Minor Drama Continued on ^d page o/Covfr.) 249 Dr. Dil worth 250 Out to Nurse 251 A Lucky Hit ■.'52 The Dowager 253 Metainora (Bnrlei.que) 254 Dreams of Delusion 255 The Shaker Lovers 256 TickUah Times VOL. xxxin. ■.'57 20 Minutes with a Tiger 258 Miralda; or, the Justice of Tacon 259 A Soldier's Courtship 260 Servants by I/egacy 261 Dying for Love 262 Alaniiing Sacrifice 263 Valrt de Shhin 264 Nichola* Nickleby VOL. XXXlV. 265 The Last of the Pigtails 266 King Rene's Daughter 267 Th* Grotto Nymph 268 A Devilish Good Joke 269 A Twice T»id Tale 270 Pas de Fascination ■(71 Hevolutionary Soldier 272 A Man Without a Head VOL. XXXV. 273 The Olio, -Part I 214 T.'ie Olio, Part 2 275 The Olio, Part 3 [ter 276 The Trnmpel.-r's Daugh- 277 Seeing Warren V78 Green Mountain Boy 279 That Note 280 Tom Noddy's Secret VOL. XXXVI. 281 Shocking Events 282 A Regular Fix 283 Dick Turpin 284 Young Scnrnp 285 Young Actress 2K6 Call at No. 1-7 287 One Touch ot Nature 288 Two B'hoys VOL. XXXVIF. 289 All the World's a Stage 290 Quash, or Nigger Prac- 29! Turn Him Out [tice 292 Pretty Girls of Stillborg ■393 Angel of the Attic 294 CircumstanoesalterCaaei 295 Ratty O'Sheal 296 A Supper In Dixie VOL. xxxvriL W Ici on Parle Francais 298 Who Killed Cock Robin 299 Declaration of Indeiiend- 300 Heads or Tails [ence 301 Oh-tinate Family 302 Mv Aunt 303 That Rasral Pat •!04 Don Paddy de Bazsn VOL. XXXIX. [ture .305 Too Much for Good Na- 306 Cure for the Fidgets 307 Jack's the Lad 308 Much Ado AboutNothing 309 Artful D