w^^^jmj,j>^^J^J»^^JgXSak PRICE,] [15 CENTS. THE VARIETY STAGE. I^o. 31. LoEelyPollywoiofWillPoKl. L, NEW YORK: Happy Hours Company, Publishers, No. 1 Chambers Street. 9^jmj0^^^jt^^ THE ETHIOPIAN DRAMA. PRICE 15 CENTS EACH. 1 Robert Make-Airs. 56 Stagenslruck Darkey. 2 Box and Cox. 57 Black M.dl 3 Mazeppa. 58 Highest Price for Old Ck)thes. 4 Uuited States Mail. 59 Howls from the OnvI Traiu. 5 The Coopers. 60 Old Hanks. 6 Old Dad's Cabin. 61 The Three Black Smiths. 7 The Rival Lover :. 62 Turkey.s in Soasou. 8 The JSliain Doctor. 03 Juba. ' 9 Jolly Millers 64 A Night wid Brudder Bones. 10 Villikius and hi.s Dinah. 65 Dixie. 11 Th3 Qtiack Doctor. 66 KingCuffee. 12 The Mytitic Spell. 67 Old Zip Coon. 13 The Black Statue. 68 Cooney iu de Hollow. U UncliJeff. 69 Porgy Joe. 15 The Mischievous Nigger. 70 Gallas Jake. 16 The Black Shoemaker. 71 De Coon Hunt. 17 The Magic Penny. 72 Don Cato. 18 The Wreck. 73 Sambo's Return. 19 Oh Hush ; or. The Virginuy Cu- 74 Under de Kerosene. 20 The Portrait Painter. [pids. 75 Mysterious Stranptr. 21 The Hop of Fash ion. 76 Da Debbil aud Dr. Faustum. 22 Bout. Squash. 77 De Old Gum Game. 23 The Virginia Mimmy. 73 Hunks Wedding Day. 21 Thieve.3 at the Hill. 79 De Octoroon. 25 Comedy of Errors. 80 De Old Kentucky Home. 23 Les Miserable.';. 81 Luciuda's Wedding. 27 New Year's Culls. 82 Mumbo Jum. 2S Troublesome S^-rvant. 83 De Creole Ball. 20 Great Arrival. 84 Mishaps of Cajsar Crum. 33 Rooms to Let 85 Pete's Luck. 31 Black Crook Burlesque. 86 Pete and Ephrain.. 32 Ticket Taker. 87 Jab>3 Hawkins 33 Hvpochotidriac. 88 De Darkey's Dream. 31 William Tell. 89 Chris Johnson. 35 Rose Dale. 90 Scipio Africanus. 36 Feast. 91 De Ghost ob Bone Squash. 37 Fenian Spy. 92 De Darkey Tragedian. 38 Jack's the Lad. 93 Possum Fat. 3J OtheUo. 94 Dat Same Old Coon. 40 CamUle. 95 Popsey Dean. 4 1 Nobody's Son. 96 De Rival Mokes. 42 Sports on a Lark. 97 Uncle Tom. 43 Actor aud Singer. 9S Desdemonum. 44 Shylock. 99 Up Head 45 Quarrelsome Servants. 109 De Maid ob de Hunkpuncas. 46 Haunted House. 101 D3 Trail ob Hlood. 47 No Cure, No Pay. 102 Da Debbil and de Maiden. 4S Fighting for the Union. 103 Da Cream ob Tenors. 4'J Hamlet the Dainty. 104 Old Uncle P>illy. 105 An Elephant on Ice. 50 Corsican Twins. 51 Deaf-iu a Horn. 106 A Manager in a Fix. 52 Challenge Dance. 107 Bones at a Raffle. 53 De Trouble begins at Nine. 108 Aunty Chloe. 54 Scenes at Gurney's. 109 Dancing Mad. 55 16,000 Years Ago. 110 Juliauna Johnson. Either of the above will be sent b^ mail, on receipt of price, by HAPPY I lOUES COMPANY, — ^ . No. 1 Chambers Street, New York. THE VA.IIIETY STA,G-E. THE LONELY POLLYWOG OF THE MILL-POND. A SANGUINAKY DEAMA IN THREE SCENES. Bt M. T. head, Esq. /Tj^KBV OF GOiVy^^^. NEW YORK; HAPPY HOURS COMPANY, Ko. 1 CHAMBERS STREET. THE LOI^ELY POLLYWOG OF THE MILL-POND. -:o:- DBAMATIS PERSONiE. Tadpole Wkigqle. (J' he Lonely Pollyioog ; in love iclth Doba MusHEAT). ; Sanouinetto Stab-in-the-dabk. (A Ruffian— his rival.) Great-Scamp, fills friend and pitcher. ) Dora IiIushead. ( The cause of all the troiible. ) COSTUMES. Tadpole Wriggle. ) Sanguinetto Stab-in-the-dark. [ Burlesque Spanish Cavalier dress. Great-Scamp. ) Dora IMushead.— White muslin dress. PROPERTIES. Handkerchief. Swords for Pollywog, Sanguinetto, and Great-Scamp. Dum-^ my made up to represent DoRA Mushead. Red fire. Entered according to act of Congress in the year 1875, by Happy Hours Company, in the office of the Librarian of Congress at Washington. *if* There is no charge for the performance of this sketch. THE LOIS'ELY POLLYWOG OF THE MILL-POND. Scene I. — A Mill-pond by moonlight ; iht pond dried up and the mill partly carried aicay. The moon rising behind a very dark doud. Thunder and lightning. Enter Sanguinetto, k, San, Ha, ha, ha ! Methinks the moon behind yon murky cloud withhokls her light— withholds her light? Ha! ha! Why then, methinks, she something has to hold it with. Would she would let it drop, that it might grow so dark that we might say, you cannot see your hand before your face. I've got a deed to do, no eye must see. The hour of my revenge has come, and will be here anon. The Lonely Pollywog too long has thrown his shadow 'cross my path, and be must be disposed of. The lovely Dora Mushead must be mine. (Crosses to 1j.c.) Ha ! who comes here? (Draws his sword. Enter Great-Scamp, k. G. S. 'Tis be— your fred and bitcher. San. My fred ! Alas ! I have no fred — and as for bitcher, such word know I not. 0. S. I said not fred and bitcher, but j'our fred and bitcher. San. Well, I know you did. Away ! I know you not, G. S. Dot do me ? Bud you bust. I'm Gread-Scab. San, ( With a start. ) Ha ! art he ? How changed thou art ; me- thiiiks thy speech is changed. Ha ! I see how 'tis ; my worthy friend has Avaudered in the noisome damps of this dark, dingy, direful, dirty, desperate spot, till— till he has caught a cold 'i the head. Is't not so, my Great-Scamp ? Here, use my wipe. (Gbeat-Scamp blows his nose. Sanguinetto weeps. San. You see me moved, my friend. I'll tell j'ou why. That trumpet tone of thine, which sounded when you blew your nose, like U^ the challeuge which some herald blows ere conquering knights rush to the tournament, reminded me of her— mv mother. , (?. S. Thy bother? 4 THE LONELT POIiLYWOCi San. No, not my bother, but my mother, I had one once. Alas ! she died one day from something which she used to drink from out a large black bottle. But to my tale. One day my sainted mother and myself were wauderiug baud iu hand — 'tsvas somewhere near this very spot. The air Avas damp and chill, and noisome exhala- tions rose irom out the earth, and greeted the olfactories most puu- gentl)'. Noting this fact, my sainted mother, turning to her boy, asked in a melting accent what it was that smelt so ; 'twas quite too much, she said, for her ])oor uerves to bear ; Avhat can it be ? the smell o'erpowered her. The smell, I said, dear mother, yes, I know what tis, I cried, while fear of spanking filled my eye, and made my bosom swell — it is, I cried, the sad remains of our old tabby cat ; she angered me, and so I slew her, as I slay all my enemies, and as I'll slay the Polly wog. My mother wept, but spanked me not ; howbeit, ere niglit herself got slewed on juice of juniper. (T^itk a sudden start.) Methinks I see her now, my Great-Scamp. G. S. Where, my fred ? Scm. Alas ! 'tis all my eye. ( Weeps. G. S. No bore, no bore, it is doo bntcb, ( Weeps hysterically on Sajjguinetto's shoulder'. San. But come ! away with Aveakness ! (PusJies Great-Scamp aicay with such force as to knock Jam down.) Hast seen the Lonely Polly wog ? G. S. (Picks himself up and strikes an attitude. ) I hast ! As now I wandered by his disbal ded, the bull-frog hooted, and the night- owl screeched ; while he, high on a rail, low perched upon the ground, sat driking lager beer. San. Ha ! sayest thou so ? This night he takes his bier indeed. Let me but meet him once in combat fell, down to the darkiug shades that brightly gleam on high I'll send him ! Out, my good sword, and ne'er slialt thou be sheathed till in his heart, ay, in his very gizzard, deep thy point lies buried. Come on, my Great-Scamp, What ho, there, PoUywog, 'tis I, thy foe ! This night or thou or I must bite the dust ! (Exeunt l. Scene 11. — The Ilut o/Polltwog. PoLLTWOG discovered asleep upon a soft Plank c. Pol. (In his sleep.) Off, off, ye goblin fiends ! let go your grip upon my abdomen. ( Comes down to the footlights. ) Ha, do I dreain ? methonght the spirits of my last night's supper came thronging round me, crying out for vengeance. Chickens boiled and fricas- seed, ay, roasted too, opened their mouths and cackled at me threat- euiuglj'. A round of cold corned beef sat on my chest, like to a weight of lead, and huge cowcumbers reared their mammoth forms above my head and seemed like giant clubs impending o'er my OF THE MILL-POND. 5 brains, to dash them out. And then methought a xvind arose, and I was suddenly a keg of lager bier, tossed on Monongahela's treacherous waves, running dread risks of snags and riffles, till my bang came out, and I awoke to find, alas ! that in my dream I'd kicked the corn cob from my whiskey jug, and with the pleasant distillation damped my virgin sheets. Alas, the day .' But I must forth. The coon is on the march in search of pokeberries, and the opossum curls up himself and munches the persimmons. I'll seek my Dora Mushead. (Exit L. Scene III. — A gloomy glen, with trees growing out of tht hare rocks, or rocks growing out of bare trees, just as is most convenient to the scenic artist. A scream is heard, and Dora. Mushead rushes on e., her hair dishev- eled. She stares madly around. D. M. Ah, let me go — the moon is round and fair, and by her light I'll wander forth to seek my Polly wog. Ha! where am I? all alone in the dark wood. Oh, heavens support me — I'm a helpless maid. If Sanguinetto now should be abroad, and meet me in this gloomy glen, I'd be past hope. Enter Sanguinetto and Great-Scamp, stealthily, l. D. M. Let me haste home for I must milk the cows. ( Turns and sees Sanguinetto and Gb.^a.tScjlm:p— shrieks and falls fainting to the earth. San. "Ha ! ha ! ha ! G. S. Ha ! ha ! ha ! San. At last my Dora Mushead, you are mine. (Runs to her and picks her up.) Yes, mine, I clasp thee in my arms, and never shall thou from these arms depart ; no, never ! never ! never ! NEVER MORE! ( Crosses ioB. G. S. Dever bore. San. Come ! quick ! away ! As he is making off xcith Dora Mushead in his arms, Polltwog enters l. and intercepts them. San. Ha ! 'tis iie ! Pol Ha ! 'tis she ! G. S. Ha ! 'tis hib. Pol. (Maliciously. J Villain ! G. S. (Sarcastically.) Boy! Pol. Ha ! calls't ttiou me boj'— Fll show thee I'm a man. Let go that beateous maid, whose pure and taper waist thy arm pollutes, and if thou art not coward, as thou art a knave, seize on thy sword and guard thyself ; thy time has oome. 6 THE LONELX POLLXWOG. G. 8. Ha ! hft ! ihink'st thou to frighten me with these big words? I pray thee go to grass— or if thou likest not that, then go to him thou call'st thy master, and toast thyself before his sulphurous fire. Out of my way ! ( Tries to nin of. JPcl. Thou dost not stir— unhand the maiden. (VoijIjYWoq attempts to seize Dora ; Sanguinetto retreats to S.E.L., and exits voith Doba, PoLLYWOG/oWoioin;/. They im- mediately re-enter with Dummy, Polltwog holding by the feet, while Sanguinetto grasps Dummy around the waist A des- perate struggle ensues, in the course of ichich the Dummy is pulled in two. Pol. Ha ! what hast thou done ? Now, villan, di-aw thy sword. San. (Draws. ) Come on, the whole or none. I'll ne'er content- ed be with half a maid. Pol, Ay, that's the word— a maid entire, or none at all. (Terrific combat. Sanguinetto is slain. Great-Scajip con- tinues the combat, and is at length run through the body, and drops for dead. Polltwog casts himself prostrate -upon the upper half of Doba Mushead, and stabs himself with his sword. Great-Scamp 96(5 up, surveys the field, and crawls to Sanguinetto, heaves a deep sigh, and falls heavily on Sangui- netto, and after two or thyee convulsive starts, expires. Bed fire. Slow vmsic, CuHTilN. Note.— The author (?) claims no rights which stage managers are bound to respect 4 they are at perfect liberty to set this piece as best suits them, an d to cut one or all of the characters out, as they may deem best. In short, the aforesaid, being rather liberal than other- wise, will forgive anything but the mutilation of his title— that, being the most original part of the whole, he would like to hand down to posterity, in all its entiret", The Public's ob't Serv'fc, M. T. Head. In Two Parts. Price 25 Cents Each, A new and unique cutertainmont, which affordH a fund of amusement for all ages. Very popular to raise funds for Schools, Churches, Societies, &:c., Part I.— Mrs. Jarley— Little Nell — John and Peter— The Chinese Giant — Mrs. Jack Sprat— Two-headed Girl — Lord Byron— Sew iug Woman— Childe Harold— Mrs. Wiuslow — The Live Yankce-Ciiptain Kidd -The Old-fashioned St'win,!^ IMachine — Viciim- The Cannibal— 1'lie IMcimaid — The Bachelor — The Maniac— His Lady Love — The Siamese Twins —Mother Goose— The Boy that stood on the Ijurning Deck- Little Bo-peep— The Giggler— Th'e Dwarf— Old King Cole— Blue Beard— The Contral)and— Signorina Scpialliui — B:ibes in the Wood— -Lick Sprat— Little Kcd Riding Hood— Fair One with G')luese Opera Botiffe. 26 An Ehgible Situation. 27 The Pet Lamb. 28 The Last Lily. 29 The Threo Temptations. 30 Katharine and Petruchio, Burles- 31 His First Brief. [qne. 32 The Girls of the Period. 33 Matched but not Mated. 34 Penelope Anne. 35 A Woman Will Be a Woman. 36 Caught in His Own Toils. 37 Couriiu Florence. 38 Lucy's Love Lesson. [Sketch. 39 A Game of Billiards, Tempemnce 40 The Wrong Bottle, Temperance Sketch, THE VARIETY STAGE PRICE .5 CENTS EACH. 1 The Big Banana. 2 Dot Mad Tog. 3 A Gay Old Man Am I. 4 The Law Allows It. 5 A Leedle Misdake. 6 The Spelling Match. 7 There's Millions In It. 8 Tootle, Tootle, Too ! 9 Dot Madrmionial Adverdisement. 10 Mulcahy's Cat. 11 Dot Quied Lotgings. 12 All in Der Familv. Either of the above will be sen^ by mail, on receipt of price, by HAPPY HOUES COMPANY, No. 1 Chambers Street, New York.