PS 3523 .E37 R8 1913 Copy 1 -=;;-'. ""^fyn; •THE RUBE DETECTIVE" A COLIEDY OEAt'IA BY lilROU LEEEIHGWELL G OPYRIGHTE.O 1913 BY ^^ ALEX BYE-^ g^^Oi,^^^^ ^,^ "" ; IT T E Under the new copyright law the rights of production of a play are not secured "by the purchase of a manuscript of it, and copying of a copyrighted play and sale of copies of it, are offences punishable hy fine and if done wilfully, hy imprison- ment. Eor manuscripts of this play and rights to produce it, apply to CHICAGO KAITUSCRIPT GOo , 431 Ho Clark Sto ^ CHICAGO, ILLo ?5 3S^^ )GI,D 34C.12 1-K "The R-u"be Detective.," A TalDloid Cojmdy Drama ■ In Three Acts o Alexander Smart "S3iiart Aleck" an upstage Deputy Sheriff, Etenezar Buzzard — •- A miser crook, ¥illiam Baker Bronx Billy, a gun man. Mother Kizzie MandelToum Landlady of the Home Hotel. "Bendy" A v^raif « > T SYHOPSIS_. ri II II II II II II It Act 1:- Back room of the Bar of the Ho^JJo*?^^ H. Ya Act 11 & 111:- Sitting Room of the Home Hotel .^^.^^^ oooOOOOOOOOooo ■ °f ffianu.,,, ^"reiiaser th» • Woe/f or'n, ' °'. ""'•o'^ase 2"K Act ?irst. Scene:" Back Room off the Bar of the Bar of the Home Hotel, This is the typical Toack room of a low Raines Law Hotel. N. Y. iLU* X 1 X EXPLAMTIOU, (1) Door L U E.Bar Backing* (2) Willi ow up hack R of^^ '^ Exterior Backing, (3) Door R Interior hacking, (4) Tahles and chairs, as per diagrame i5) Piano and stool R.U, Signs and Lithos hung on walls o — oooOOOOOOOooo—- 3-K _ . . At Rise:- Mother Kizzie "Mandelloum discovered going over account ■book at talole L. She wears apron and should "be a fat comfortable looking party. William Baker, Bronx Billy a well dressed young fellow vfith assured manner and slight touch of swagger enters from "bar L U E) Billy G-ood morning, Kizzie,, Kiz z i e Good morning, Billy. Billy • Are you letting the bar run it self o Kiz z i e There ain't no custom much at this tinK of the day^ I'm just figgerin' how I'm go in' to pay rent and the brewery both today. Say, ain't you forgot some thin' Billy? Billy • ^'orgot somethin'? forgot nothin* <. You nBan my room rent? A swell chance a guy has to forget that, when he's boardin' off you. Say Kizzie I'm cleaned, just cleaneda Kiz z i e I wasn't a mentioning no thin' so low and common as dirty money, what I was a just a hintin' was, ain't you got a kiss for your little girlo Billy (As a matter of course) Sure '^ Oh I ain't sore about owin' you money. Sure not, I was just thinking about uaking a ' ' ' touch, let me have five bucks and I'll go back to the game» Kiz z i e You'll have Lo wait till Casey the "bar keep" gets back, he's got the combination, I ain'to • Billy Where is Casey? Kiz z i e The Captain of the Precinct sent to question him about the guy you smashed night before 3.asto . • Billya ^^ (In aggrieved tone) What, and are they beefing about that? I only bounced a bottle of bees off his beario What's that? \ YiTith their Sullivan law a guy can't carry a "gat" no more, •; he's likely to do seven. years c The judges send you up for packing Steele, "Knucks" bla.ck-jacks and sich^ V^hat's a gent ' to carry. This little old town's gettin' to be a hell of -^a place to live in, I ifash Casey vrould get backo I thought you had Bendy tend bar v/hile he was away^ Kiz z i e She t s gone crazy on roller skates, I can't seem to keep her around the joint no more,, (IToise outside, voices) Bendy (Outside) Yes, you will - Yah s YahlYah, come inside, and we'll put you in the veal stew for lunch to-day. You big calf. (Enters sliding on one skate. Carries the other in hand.) Kiz z i e Y/hat's going on here? (Grabs at Bendy) Bendy (Dodges her) I am on one skate „ I just took off the other to swipe Otto SchmalZo He was fresh and — Kizzie Shut up J You're always scrapping vdth those boysi Y/hy don't you learn to b'e a lady like me? Now cut out this monkey dodle business^ Cut it out or I'll shut you in the cellar with the rats« Bendy No, you won't. I've been bait for them rats long enough. 4-K Kiz z i e Well perhaps I' 11 change off and let Billy's Bull pup hare 'a "bite at you^ Billy ' ■ See here, Kizzie,. I don't wa.nt no one Txit me feedin' my dog„ It's porterhouse steaks for himo- 'iThere have you "been Bendy? Be nay Over to Tomkins square, skatin' on the asphalts Kizzie (Picks up hat) Y/ell, you skate around here now, sind mind the iDar. I'm going around to the station 'house and see what keeps Caseyj By, Toy, Billy, Pet, (KisscF; him on cheek..) > Bendy (Aside) ?/ell wouldn't that nake you sicko (Takes off skate) Kizzie I won't be long. Bendy . - (Sings) "I don't care if you never come "backo" (Kizzie exits L U E) Billy Get me a cigar Bendy? Bandy What kind, a Rubfeerino, or a I'uma de Cabbajo? Billy An imported cigar of course, a gentleman's smoke, for a gentleman o Bendy Where's the gentleman? (Looking around) Billy Right here, (Slaps himself on breast) (Enter Uncle Aleck,' he carries an old fashioned carpet bag and • umbrella « ) Me J I am Mr. William Baker, and you don't want to forget it, Seel Benvdy Keep your shirt on, Billy ^ Billy ^^ ITow get to Hell out of here and get mo that, cigsit , ■ Bendy (To Aleck) Y/hat are you going to take Claud ei'^'^'Q?^ Aleck "^ ■^^ You've got me wrong young lady,, I ain't "Claude"' ^-K! ^%-fe Bendy' ' ^^^'^ What are you going to take? Aleclr ' _ r' Thank you, I'll take- this chair ^ if you don't mindo I'm kind of tuckered out ^ (Sits opposite Billy., puts carpet .bag on table) Billy Get a gait on you, Bendy, get a gait on, (Aleck lays umbrella on table, as Bendy exits L U E) Billy (Indignantly) say you- Aleck Me? Billy • Yes you, This table is reserved, Aleck Is it. Billy That's what I said„ So don't butt in. Aleck Butt in? ?/hy I ain't no goat.. 5-K Billyo You'll think you're a goat. If I start somethingj Say J Aleck Say it I Billy I don't want this "flewy" on the table. So I'm going to put it so,- (Puts bag on floor) Then I'm going to kick it out the window o Ale ck (Rising in alarm) Don'-HDon'tl It may go offc Billyo ?/ha t go off? Aleck o Something I've got in the bag; the- annihilatorl If it explodes you'll think a powder mill blew up,, Billy, What dynamite? (Backing away and sits at other table) ■ j\^ie ck Morsei Morsel Be keerfulj (Picks up bag carefully, walks after Billy sitting opposite him at other table, puts bag on it, business as before) Billy Keep away from me with that damned thingo (Rising going back to first table) What are you carrying it around for anyway? Aleck It's an invention of my friend Van Jiggins, and I am going to put' it with several other inventions of his'n on the market^ Do you know Jiggins? Billy No I -don'to Alecko He's a friend of St^ Eiimo » Do you know St^ Elmo? Billyo No, and I never met anybody who ever dido (Bendy enters with cigar box goes over to Billy, he takes cigar) Bendy Well, come across^ ■ Q^ Charge it, to me,, ^'v Bendy ^iPfyy, Can't do it, ain't made a sale this A, M, yet p ^^ * -X • Billy '^'^^^^^ Well sell him something, (Pointing to Aleck) and collect '"^ for this, (Lights cigar) Bendy Clarence! Dos't hear? Y/hat are you drinking o Aleck Why nuthin', I ain't thirsty „ I don't want any of your derned drinks, but hold on, (aside) I'd better buy so me thin'. of this little gal, just to patronize this store, Have you any good buttermilk? Bendy No, just sold the last drop to a polio eman. Aleck Have you any sweetl apple cider? Bendy Now you're on. Aleck (Rises looks at chair) On what? Bendy Get next, get next, (Disgustedo) Ale ck (Looks around) ijext to what? 6-K Bendy Yourself, learn United S'tates^ or I'll think you're offo Aleck Oh, I'm off now? Bendy Yes, you're off your noodleo Do you want some cider? Ale ck Yes, give me about six cents v/ortho Bendy Now your shoutings Aleck I ain't shouting, very loud, take your pay out of thiSo (Hands coin. Bendy exits L U E) Billy Say? Aleck Say it , Billy Y/hat us e is this annihilate r? Aleck It's a corn protector and a crow exterminator « You see the crows got so thick down in our parts they they pulled the corn up as fast as we could plant it, and they were so sassy that shooting at them with a common gun didn't do no good. So I got Jiggins to invent the annihilate r^ ?unny you don't know Jiggins, Billy I don't know him and I don't want to know him^ Aleck He's red headed and he can make anything from a sewing machine to a Presbyterian Pulpit „ Y/eil the reservoir of the annihilator holds a pound of high explosive and a pint of nail heads, and the "barrel telescopes^, So I can lengthen it out two feet so (Spreads out hands, catches Billy on nose) Yep c Longer-- Billy Say cut that a (feeling nose) Aleck Over two feeto Iv/on't cut an inch^ Y/hy I've £^led over a thousand crows at a shoto The chickens in Deacon Taylor ' s orchard and blew the hind-legs off Uncle Lickshingle-' s "Keow"^^ (Bendy re-enters with cider, hands it to Al.e"d^>v gives him his change) ^'^il* /^ Aleck '^i^ Say, talking of cro?irs , do you know anything about crows? '^. Bendy He knows "Old crow" pretty well^ Don't you Billy? Alecko If he knows old cro?/, maybe he knows cl.d Bu-zzardc Bendy Of course, he does^ we all know Old Buzzard, eh Billy? Aleck Ebenezar Blizzard o Bendy "Sure that's his name:, Billy. _ Shut upi Bendy - don't talk so mucho (to Aleck) what do you want to know about Buzzard? Aleck; I want to meet himo Billy, He ' s ha rd to me et ,, Ale ck : ■ I want him to do me a favor, a financial favor „ 7-K Bendy Ylhy he never did anylDOdy a favor in his lifeo' He makes the eagle scream on every dollar. He gets hold of ^ He squeezes it so tights Alecko Well, I was told he drops in here, and I want to meet him.. Silly You're wasting your time, Mr „ ) Mr^-- Aleck* Smart's my name, Billy, Smart eh, You look it » Ale ck , Thanks o My first name is Alexander, Aleck for shorty Billy, Smart Aleck, eh^ Aleck* Yep 5 what's your' name? Billy William Saymor, I am the mayor of the city* You can call me Bill<, Aleck, Y/ell, that's real good of youc I n^ay have to call you someday and I won't forget it, Billy. Bendy, tell Kizzie when she comes in that I've just' stepped over to Mulligans to shake up the police department o (exit L U E Bendy The only shaking you'll ever do will "be for the drinkSo Say you don-t want to let a stiff like that kid you* Alecko Little girl J come here» You! re a nice girl', T)ih.y don't you speak English? Tell me, your name is Bendy* That's a funny nameo B^ndy (Pause) It's the only name I've got^, You see I was named after a dog^ Ale dk ¥/hat o O^ Bendy Yes, a iDull dog, named Eendigo, He was a pe t of old MandellDum and a ri "bison winner at the dog shov;^ Old Mande'i.^um v/as Mrs, Mandel bum's husbands Aleck, . "^^W^/^ Her Tduhi hustend, yes^ ^^ ""^ Bendy She's a widow nowo Her husband' is diseased,, Aleck. You mean "deceasedo'" Bendy Say, who's telling this you or me? Ale ck , Go on^ Bendy V/ell, Old Ms.ndel'bum, he was fond of that dog, and when I came to them, and I had no other name, he called me after him. Ale ck Poor little gall So you had no other name, who were your people? Bendy Never had none as I r.ememlDer, They tell me Old Buzzard picked me up on a doorstep and "brought me to the Mandel'bum.s^ Bendy Aleck If I had people, we lost ea.ch other somehowo learned careless of us« Say,^ what do you vvant to see old Buzzard for? Alecko (Seriously) I want to show him a christians duty = A duty every true man owes to the widow and the orphan, I left hehind me a trouhled hearthstone up in the country where I come from and I vi^ant to return a messenger of light and glad tidings s Bendy I don't want to put the meri-y Kibosh on you, but you've • come to a queer place and to 'queer people to expect to get any goodo We i re a tough- bunch, and Ebenezer Buzzard he is the wustest of the wust o He ain't got no us e for the widow and the orphan^ Mother Mandelbum is a widow and I'm an orphan, and look where we get offo ?/hy I never pass him without side steppin' c Aleck What does he beat you? I shoiild extemporize Y/hat, Bendy Why, it's only last week he put a mouse on my eye, mouse, why this was a rat „ I wish someone would put a cauliflower on his ear^ • • Aleck It ain't the season for cauliflo"Eiers , Bendy Oh you give me a pain, you're a fresh old doughnut anyway, but I sort of like youo Say how long are you going to be here? ■ ■ Aleckc I don't know yet ^ This here is a hotel, ain't it? Bendy Sure a This is the Home Hotel.. Everybody who stops here ' thinks of home 5 this is so different o j Aleck= Qq Then I guess I'll stop here. / ^l' Bendy ■ '^'..^^^^■ Say, this ain't no place for hayseeds p If anyone do^saify^ovi, don't say I didn't put you next^ ' /^ » / Alecko ^^/>^^& Ahemi Bendy, I generally attend to my o^mx cleaningo (Re-e^fer '' Kizzie L U E followed by Buzzards He should have eccentric character make up^, He wears rusty black and his make up suggests his name) Bendy But I'm giving it to you straight c This ain't no place for a ministers son, You don't want to stop hereo Kiz z i e If he's got the "cush" why don't he want to stop hereo You little rat,' are you knocking my hotel? I'll take a lemon squeezer to you. So wait on this customer, and I'll' attend to this gent „ (Strikes at Bendy who dodges blov/) Bendy (To Blizzard) Y/hat will you have? Buzzard One large beer^ (Bendy exits L U E) Kizzie (To Aleck) You want accommodations, I'm pretty full but I'll find room for you„ 9-K ■ , ' Aleckc That's real good of you, Kizzie Ain't it. Oh ye So Here at this hot el we alv/ays "take the stranger in" Is this "Junk" yourn? (Lifts hag, drops it) (Aleck picks it up)- Mercy I hope you haven't "brought your gold hricks already. I have some of the best on the market follow me, and I'll show you where I'll "stick you up" for' to-night Aleck a I'' 11 never get "stuck up" no natter where you put me, I ain't that kind, (Kizzie exits Re Aleck follows) ■ Buzzard (Calls) You beggars brat] Hurry up with that beer. Ben dy (Outside L) I am a hurry in ' « (Enters with schooner of beer) Buzzard Humph J (takes small bundle from inside pocket slovay opens it. counts out five pennies) 1-2-3-4-5" (She puts beer on table L. beside him) There, Bendycount them and see if there are five or six» Bendy (Pretends to count) There's only four^ Buzzard (excited) Eo, five, I hope to die if there ain't five. Bendy Of course there is, I only wanted to scare you to death. Buzzard Fivo cents :.s too much for- a glass of beero They're selling it at the Greeks for three o (Buzzard shivers) Bendy Lord bur your shakings Buzzard I'm coldi (Teeth chattering) C-c-cold. Bendy V/hy don't you carry an oil stoveoto heat your old cold feet. Get a chest protector to warm your old f rapped heart. Buzzard (Barks at her) Shut up. Bendy If I was you, I'd get some heavy clothe s< Buzzard Get me some pepper. Bendy Pepper? Buzzard I want it f r my be er , Hur ry . Bendy I am a hurrying. (Rushes out L) Blizzard Warm clothesl All very-well for people vtio' have plenty of money, but I'm poor. Times are too hardo Bendy (Re-enters) Here's the pepper. (Holds up shaker) Buzzard L et me have it . Bendy Y.here will you have it. In the left eye the right eye or the nose? (Puts it under his nose) ' Buzzard Achew.' Achewi (Commences to sneeze) (Grabbing shaker away from her, chases her around- table , sneezing all the time) Kizzie What's' going on here? 10-K Bendy He's trying to kiss me. (Buzzard shakes fist at her returns to talDle drinking loeer) ' Kiz z i e Well, v^hy didn't you let him„ Isn't he my landlord. Don't I 0¥/e him rent? Ughl That lying devil's To rat , Ivizzie Now Ebenezar-- Buzzard (Sneezes) Achewl AchewJ Bendy Old Ebenezaro Got pepper up his "beezer" Ain't he a sneezer. Say, he was shivering to death, a minute ago and now he's hot and he ain't satisfied., (Aleck enters L) Bendy (Aside to Aleck) Say you'd better sing out for something to drink ■ Thanks Bendy, I ain't thirsty,' Bendy You know Kizzie don't have any dead ones around here. What do you call that. (Point s'to Buzzard) Is that alive? Bendy Yep. But it hadn't outer be. By the way, that's your nan, Alecko Eh, Bendy That ' s Buzzardo Aleck • Buzzard, By thunder he looks it. He's a carrion bird, all right Looks as if he'd lived off dead horses all his life. Veil ' I'm here to go through with it , and I can't back out now.' (Voice outside L U E) BarkeepI BarkeepI Anybody tending bar here^ . ' Kizzie ' -> (Starts) Do you hear Bendy? V/hy ain't you om your job"? Hurry'- Bendy ^ "^-^cf^^ I am a hurrying, (exit L U E Kizzie follows) • * Aleck (Goes over to Buzzard) Good morning sire Suzzard (Looks up from beer) Well, what if it is good, (Looks at Aleck sbarply) I don't know you, I don't believe I ever saw you before Alecko- (Eriendly voice) May be not o Good morning sir. Buzzard Is that what you come over here to say to me? Thats the way I start in until we're better acquainted. Buzzard I don't want to know youo Ale ck But you are one of the things that brought me to IJew York. Thing? Thing? Do you call me a thing? 11-K Al6 ck I don't know what I'll call yon before I get through with you Buzzard ous ac to — i -,., _^ , Alecko Sit down] Eh. " ^"^2ard Aleck. Sit down Buzzard. (Puts hand on shoulder forces him down.) Buzzard You know my name. Ale ck l:iLil ?TlooMjg"?cr." ^'^"'^^^'■- ^°" -^ ^'^^ particular -D + / .T. , Buzzard But-- (About to rise again) A-i*G clc Sit down, Buzzard. (Business as hefore.) wu * ■, ! Buzzard, What do you Virant? Also Ic My name is Smart, (Buzzard starfc;l t ^ m ^v. Of captain Harr/s:^rt .Tr H^'rll^l^^Setrl T^r/tTrT^H Bus 7 P T*f] (St_.^a>ers) ;: - l thlni so, but 1 -haven • t tlMe to- (Rises have^^rfiSed-il^'IS'^' as'before) Your glass is empty, ncive i-c iiiied again. (Bendy enters L U E) ' W4TT Buzzard Y/ill you pay for it? r,r. Aleck ?t oTofV^^''^^'. ^^^^ *^^^ °1^ ^^^ another drink pay for It out of this. (Handing Mil) And keep the cHaSg^-^^ r.1 J.-, ' Bendy '^^-^t Oh thank you, Mr, Aleck'. (Exit I U E) ^ ^/^/ Av, ' ^ Buzzard ^,^J^^ Ahem. Your m.oney must come easy, ^' Z^' / llTi; S?:ferL^° "^ c^nLt;nce at least is easy. But^^^^^^ /a ■ ^ Buzzard (Squirms) ?t%SS/^! :a\"'^^j?L?*^*''" ^°-^^ "-^ — * =— rd -^ -, . Buzzard I have just remembered an important engagement - (Rises) :ir^Tit^/^^iriTi: aS ^i^ ;.%?-:_-- - -= -.e T /tvt . n Buzzard I - (Nervously) Aleck You held a mortgage on his home. T -u^-i J -J. ^ . Buzzard I hold It still. 12- K Aleck (Takes out pocket book produces telegram) Just -before leavins ITew York he vfired his v/ife whom by the way you knew before he married her, he sent her a telegram, this- (Reads) "Have redeemed the mortgage, am bringing fan the release as a present will be home to-night." (Puts telegram back in pocket book) Suzzard He - he never redeemed it o Aleck,-. My brother never lied to a man in his life. He couldn't lie to the woman he ado redo (Bendy re-enters v^rith beer) Buzzard Then you mean to say I Aleck. I mean that you are threatening to fore-closeo Now I am here to propose something, you say you still hold the mortgage. I will undertake to redeem it. Buzzard Aho ^ - Alecko In a short while we ?/ill pay the interest as before, and you'll extend the time, BiE2ard I don't do business that way^ .- . Aleck„ You will this time to. help the vadow out of her trouble, I've come here to see you, for that object as much as to bring the murderers of my brother to the Electric chair „ You mav be able to help me in that tooc Blizzard ■ ■ I help — (Rising) Ale ck c Yes, be a man Buzzard and don't refuse to help the widow in her need, of -the memory of the murdered man and the helpless wife, he left behind him^ will haunt you to the longest day you live, but if you do this act of charity of justice, the glow of righteousness will steal into your heart like a sunbeam into a shady place « Sit dovm Buzzard or by thunder I'll knock you downi (Buzzard runs behind tci,ble.) * Buzzard. Help: Help] ■ Bendy (Clings to Aleck) Oh Mr. Aleck, don't start nothings (Enter Bilxy and Kizzie L U B Kizzie carries bung-starter) What's the matter? Who's start.in' anything? Y/hat gent is it, would make rough house in the peaceful Home Hotel? (Picks up chair \vhich Buzzard has overturned) Gents before you start to break up things remember the re = 3 a lady present, (To Aleck) By the way, that reminds me, you haven 't br agist ered yet, coire and put your "monicker" on the book, and separate yourself from some coin. Being as it's you I only collect a week in advance, (Takes Aledk by arm, leads him L U E; Alecko Buzzard I'll see you again., (exits L U B wi th Kizzie J Billy (To Buzzard who is trembling with excitement) Y.'hat ' s the matter, Popi Ale ck , Eo you knoviT who that is., Billy YJhat , that Rube, Suzzardo P.G ' 3 fciae "brother of that sea-daptaln that you — Billy Hush I (Slaps hand over Buzzard's mouth) (to Berdy) Say, haven't you work to do ? Bendy Yes, thank you, all I want at present,, Billy Well get alDOut it, Hurry, Bendy I am a hurrying.-, (Exit L U E) Buzzard He has "been threatening me about the mortgage and he said too that'lae's going to "bring his brother's murderers to the electric chair„ CLaughs) Indeed, Y/hat had v/e hotter do, Pop? Buz zard :?asten a quarrel on him, ard-- Billy Croak him, -yes, we'll croak him, ' ' ' Buzzard I'm an old man, Billy, You croak him, and I'll swear you did it in self defense, Billy » You'd swear to anything wouldn't you? Sit there. (Indicates- chair L at table L) (Produces pack of cards shuffles them) (Re-enters .Kizzie and Aleck) Billy Kizzie, would you like to cut into a little draw poker. TCizzie ¥ot now, -haven't time, perhaps Mr, Smart here — Billy V/hat that Rube, no thanks = He'd holler if he lost a half a dollar. Ale ck Who 'd- holler? Billy You— .. On Aleck. A ^J^ I'll bet you a dime, I wouldn't .- •*'w "^/r^ Billy = ^^J^^> • You guys are always skinned when you come to town, '-^rf' /r. Aleck. ^^^^^^ You can't skin mea I beat Deacon Bubey out of a bale of ""^ hay last summer » Vfhat are yau going to play*? Billy Draw poker* Aleck Never played it, , ' ,-, Billir I'll learn you the game,, It won't cost you nothing till you get the hang of it <, Alecko Eire away, Billy You deal yowr cards one at a time, (dealing) until you get five, then you save your pairs, You know two of a kind is a pair^ Ale c k„ ■ ' Yep, I s ee - you and Buzzard are a pairo Billy V/hat do you mean? 14-K ■ Alecks You're two of a kind. What do you do with theme Billy, Keep them and throw the -others- avmy . (Aleck keeps two cards) (Throws discards on floor) ' ■ Billy Here, pick those up, Y^e want to use them again. Aleck Why didn't you say so? Billy. Now you want to draw three cards. You can ha?-e as laany as you want, but this time you just v/ant three. Aleck. I_want three cards. I can have as many as I want. This time I just want three. And th-e man v/ith the most pairs, v/ins , ' ' ■ ■ Billy ■ mw 1 bet twenty dollars— (Lays dovm hill) Aleck, (Picks up bill, reads) "Clam Bank,' Coney Island. Hardshell Cashier, Billy Crab Treasurer, Say Mr* Mayor is this bill good, Billy • Good enough, I am the mayor I make them myself. Ale ck Now what am I to do? Billy You can raise me, or call me, Aleck Y/hat am I to call you? Billy It will take' your twenty dollars to call me „ (Aleck takes out sock from which he takes out roll of money, slips off twenty replaces sock with mon^y in pocket) AX© clc There you be, I call you. Billy Y/hat have you got , ' Aleckj A pair of two spots and cv pair of three spots ^ Billy They's no good, I have three pair of five spots, now it's your deal ^ . A3-e ck 5, (Starts to shuffle. Kizzie sneaks np behind him, takes sock out of pocket, starts away with it , but sock has small rope tied to It and she is brought up v/ith jerk as other end of the rope IS tied to Aleck's waist. As Meek turns, she drops sock, he haulrs it in, replaces sock) AIg ck ^ That's another one of Van Jiggins ideas. (Deals cards) You say to deal one card at a time until you get five and the, man Y/ith'the most pairs wins.. ■ ■■ ' Billy. That's what I said, (discarding) Give me three cards; Al e ck . You can draw as many as you'-want but this time, you want three I Gives Billy three cards, takes rest of deck himself,) Ale ck The man v/ith the most .-pairs wins, eh? Billy Surei 15-K Ale ck (Picks up Billy(s discards) Fight as well have these two. Billy,, Yfliat do you 'bet « Aleck Ten cents J I mean ten dollars. (Puts down money) Billy I call youo (Covering money) What have you got? ■ A^.eck, I've got seventeen pairs^ Billy liThat. Ale ck ^. Yep, Two pair, two spots, two pair three spots, two pair five spots, two pair of seven spots, two pair six spots, two pair king spots, two pair nine spots t-'o pair jack spots - and Mg Casino, hy Gosh', (Kizzie hangs sign on wallj Billy, That's ho good, I've got a cuckoo flush, (see that sign) Ale ck J, (Reads) "A cuckoo flush heats any hand to-day, '= What's a cuckoo flush? , Billy, (Takes m money j shows cards) Three red ones and two black ne s Al eck c. Say I had one of those gol-darned things, didn't know it was any good„ Billy.- (Deals) You should have kept it c Ale ck The man with the most pairs wins but a cuckoo flush beats anything eh? Say I'll bet everything I^ve got on this, Billyo How much have you got ? Al eck Twenty seven fifty, Q_ Billy, ^^^L. I 11 cover it, (They lay down money) ^at have '^you got? Al6 clc Un triumph) I've got one of them cuckoos. (Kizzie Sfe^^/^ Billy '^'^^ ^ fou lose. (Tries to take money „■) Ale ck , (Throws his hand off) No J don't^ Billy Look at the sign^ Ale ck (Reads) "Only one cuckoo flush'allowed in one game." Billy And I held that one, So I v/in, T^.sndy That's a flim-flam] (Grabs money from table) And you're not going to work it on my friend, Billy ■ You little brat, give me that m-oney, I won it. Bendy . You didn't win on the squire, -m. Billy Ebenezar take it away from her. Suzzard (Grats Bendy, takes bills from her) I'yb got it I've got it , ' I3endy (Stn^ggling) You iDunch of crooks, Mr. Aleck, Don't you stand for this, why v/hat he bet against you v/as only adver- tising stuff o Ai Q ck Be .luiet little gal I knev/ it/ Omne s what I - - • AXg ck Yep„ He bet coney Island money "agains t me, and I bet confederate money against him^ It- ain't worth five cents a bushel (Lauff?B ) Rube? (Laughs) "^ Buzzard. (Examining bills) It's true/ Baker, it ^ s true, he's swindled Als clc TOiat did you call that man? Baker. Billy, So you are Billv Baker eh, of the Home Hotel eh,- You're another one of them things I came to New York about, Billy Kizzie you lock Bendy in- the ice box and keep in the bar yourself until I call you. Kizzie Billy, Don't start nothin' for Gawd's sake, don't Billy, vnu '^L^! I tell you, (Throws Bendy into Kizzie = s ams ) Dajnn you, do as I tell you., (Porces them both of f L U E Kizzie begging and Bendy screaming and struggling) f _ Billy„ (Closes door L U E. shuts it, and locks it putting key in wTnfJ •? r ^^""'i^ ^°'' ^'^^ sot you, Mr. Man? Ind right where I want you. (laughs) '^&'^^ AX s c k a^whilP^Mn ?°^^i^'/o ^^ile about. Maybe after you have ns a while, you'll wish you hadn't, First you' about you J, I ama Billy Billy. First you're going to give me what real money you've got about you J, ./ j^u. vc ^vo Al e ck You think I amj Yes. . Alecko Think again, your firiit think Is "nothink„" Billy. And then for your freshness, I'm going to cut off one of your ears and put it in my pocket? AIg cir Holy max^kerel] And is old Buzzard there gMng to he^p you Billy^ 01 ^ew York City. I can lick any policeman in the ward„ AIg ck li?k\?rrt?I'i%''^'r'' ^''^^ up-state ani I never claimed to iici more than a postage stamp, but I'm going to keet) mv w?l^'^bf v'^^'"' r^ r^^' ^° ^^^i ^^'^y ^"-^^^ Silly S ^h^coroner will think a nule has kicked you to death. coroner (HandB Billy knife) Better kill him., Billy, icill him at one/ I'll testify you did it in self defense . (Billy grate knifS rushes on Aleck who up-ends table, getting it'^bftween them ;e, 17-K Billy throws table around it hits Buzzard who howls with pain) Aleck a (Pulls annihilator levels it) Beware the annihilatorj Get out of herej or I'll blow you both to Kingdom cornea (Throws annihilator out full length Billy and Buzzard jump out window) C U R T A I ¥ = 1' M tl II [I II II 2nd Curtain:- Ale ok , (Br eats door in L U E) Mother Ma nd el bum you let Bendy out of the ice box or I'll blow up your whole damned Hotel„ (Bendy and Kizzie re-enter Aleck flourishes annihilator. Kizzie screams coaJLapses in chair, Aleck explains in pantomime for- C U R T A I E, " It II if II li II 1-K Act Second,, Scene:- Sitting room of the Home Hotel. 1, 1 X II II II I! li II M II II ir TT (1) Door in flat. Interior -backingo (2) Window in fl^. Exterior Toacking, (3) Door I 2 E Lock and key. Interior tacking. (4) Door R 3 E, (5) 'Coucli, (6) Table and chairs. (7) Screen <> Lamp on taole. oooOOOOOOOooo 2-K DiscoYered at rise:- Billy is in shirt sleeTes' asleep on 0^+^;^^''^^^'^ ^''^^''^ hurriedly L dcor in flat, turns up lamp on talole, then goes over to Billy, shakes him by shoulder) IBt_i2 7 r^ y c\ Get up, Billy, Wake up J \7ake up I . Billy. Sleepily) what 's the mtter? I wish you'd let me alonsc (Sits up on couch) ¥/hat ' s eating you? ^unec Buzzard I'm nervous. The police wouldn't hold that fellow Billy llhat fellow? ^ ' Buzzard Ylhy, that Rube, Billy, Sins^Vlnft'hP^'rr ''^^ "'*^ ''^""'* ^^ carrying concealed weapons? Dijn't he threaten us with that cannon-? Didn't thev find It on him? pon't the Sullivan law expressly say they ^ can send a guy up for seven years for packing a guS unless he has a special license^ . ^ unless Buzzard' l^l'rJ'^l-^^n ^^^^ ^^° ^^Slit. Ha's a deputy Sheriff from Columbia County engaged on detective duty"! Buzzard' c rigl- .ged 01 Billy^ Y/hat, that Rube? Buzzard Yes, Billy mI S^? v^^^ ^^^* j^tice, V/hy look at v*.at they did to big Jack Zeligi Held him in ten thousand' bail and on a ?r^« up too, and him belonging here on the lowe? EaS SiL JSts are going to hell here in little old Uew York I think im ■ Zrsl\^T^,IV^-r^^'' '-'^^ --^^- Mve^'sJmf J?L^le^^es, Buzzards l^l captain_ slapped him on the back and wished him luck in Selp Sim?''''' ""^ '^''- ^^ ^°^^^ --^* -- ^^^ pc^ioe to^ Billy., rjL\\1„?„V"t'£t%^^^" *'-^'' '''^' "^"^1 -"■• ^^. '^1^ what . , ,, . ^ Buz-zard -r. • T ■ Billy, To^^ui'^i r^^ ^^^^i^ '^- ^^'^1^ ^ ^^i^k I-d better get Mzzi e ^Sn?rila^o^^^-d^?ha^-do^u°h-he-Sa^:So^t-ss!^ ^- --"- TT J ,j. J. • Buzzard^ he don't touch booze, onlv oi.-^pr p-iTT-,r ^.. ^;^ .*.•,.-, next wee.. (.»„l„,Xy)%;r;L^l:^.^ortL"?liraser:n1°!^ " B3.11y ^ , ^. , Buzzard. You know that I am grateful „ 3-K- Billy, Grateful, Say laefore you get those papers. I want my Mt, T Z^^Fz..^° ^^® ^^^^ ^^^^ ^ ^°"*^^ 0^ thanks, what do you think i heit his bean in for - my health? forget it. I spoiled a ■ ' new ram coat m the job- too, that cost me over thirty bucks, a.^>.!°'"^^''T i^-^. ^2 Pie<^es. He was a tough guy^ He'd a done me sure, If I ha an' t had a black jack and hit him from behind. He moaned that he was fighting for "Mary" just before J- put the finishing touches to him^ I vender who was Mary, Buzzardo His wife] Damn her J Oh I would like to have seen her face as his body was carried in, Billy. Oh, you k©Bsr her, eh, B^uzzard Knew her? Why man, she' has nade me what I am. She was the f?»^J It \'^l misery. She jilted me for her first husband, the father of her- child, and then when she became a widow. I wooed her again„ And the second tim.e, she threw me over and married the man you have just murdered, Billy, Cut out that v^ord "murdered" imke it "croaked" It means just as much and it don't jar my nerves like "murdered" Ugh. Murder sounds like the death chamber and the Electric chair. So this Dame Mary is twice a widow eh? Biozzard Ye s . Billy, And she »s 'got a Kid, eh. Buzzard She had. Her baby daughter was stolen away when she was about two years old, (smiles) Billy And who did the kid-napping, you? Buzzard I didn't say I did„ - Billy. You don't have to" say it, (Pause) Well, well, what a dirty old crook you are I ain't no cherub but you've got me beat forty ways for Sunday, (Whining) Y/e're like father and son, Billy. Billy, Cut that 2 I don't like the relationship, Buzzardo And you'll let me have those papers of mine, Billy ' • Billy,- Yes for fifteen hundred dollars » B-uz zard Til/hat I Do you want to ruin me? Billy ,, Ruin you? You'll be that much td^food on the deal. Buzzard ¥/ell, well, I'll give you the money „ Billy ?/hen, BiAzzard To-morrow, Billy It ' s a bargain. Buzzard Let me look at them now. 4-K Billy« KlL\"a IS sarBSIardT^cJ^fS^f *??" ^°^ -^ -ty with -ght hire so„e„„???'^?i3 tt"e* l^lj^^^^r^e'™^* "'"• ^°" Dh PiTi,'. T„ Buzzard, un J3illy, how you wrong me Billy She's grown to woman hood now?^ (Puts on coat) Do you know^'whl're she is' Oh yes, . Buzzard Did you bring her up? ^ ^' Ahpm' T -h^ XI 1, n Buzzard Anem, j had her brought up» • How? Billy, (Fiercely) By the hair n-?^^^i^ known the JoTs ol Sildhood she'ts^' J^""^"^^ ^ ^^ '"^ — Tilest of the vile I ho^f tn « \ ^" reared among the and then I will h?ing the heggarm^th."" 'f2^^~ ^^^i-inal together and let them know if ^^s my wo .kf '^ daughter pSt ^<:^LnVlll\:%^:\£^^^ -J'- '^'^ ^°- to Detective" You are- not fif f' ^^^^^^^te for that "Rube (Exit door in flat, R at'^^,^°f ^7^/°^ ^ minister's son. Picks up the "butt" of BiSy^s Jl /^""f ^°l^ over to couch, breaks it up in corn io^ i.-"^ cigar cuts off piece of it Piece Of paper iS;Sicha?e'^:rSi'? he produce?, pulls o^ Of Billy'scigar in it aboSt f?T >,.°^^^'' ^"^ts, puts remainder Bendy as she^.ptoes ac?o\°f s^^ge^^^^feV^^f - J| ^-- ihrXi^ jr^^L'L"^"^^ ^^^^^^ ^- down stage) What you, .ustnow, --dy. ^^^ Where were you going? ^^^^^^^^ ^^'^ Down stairs again. ^^""^^ Oh you came up-stairs and^'heSI" Then I go do.^ stairs, yes^sir. Why did you come up. ^^^^ard Just to come up sir, "^ And then go down- Buzzard To go dorm, sir. ^^""^^ But— Buzzard I seen you "swlvinp-" "Rt m -rr? • guy sir. 5-K Bah I Yes sir. You are lying to me Euz z a rd nendy Buzzard -V ■ T Bendy les sir, I - I mean no sir,. I^d^ut^o^f r"" ^^ ^^^^ listening to Billy and myself • see one/ ° ^hoe-^strings , l^ut I toiow an^ idiot Sen i rPT. 1 BSndy Thank you, sir, . , ^ tim-u 1 .. ^ Buzzard "Thank me" for what? _, , . Bendy 3^0 r being an idiot, mercy Aleck ^in??n? l^^}^ ^'^ ^""^^^ in attitude of imploring mercy Aleck pulls out bandanna handkerchief • wipe s forehead Irorhim'^gSn'Jrom fjo'S 'r^^'t ^^^ ^^^'^^ B^JrTUt^ falling 0Yfr?tI??nV w ^ ^""^"^ f*^^^^ ^^^^^ in^° «°uch up mffs ?o? doo^ P i?^^' T^^!' °°''^°^' B^^^rd scrambles up makes for door, e.ats Aleck stands by open door crash heard) f-r, • K Bendy ' (Excitedly) T/hat is that? Oh, where is Buzzard? Ale ck To'lo^^lTy tre lay!"- ' "^^P™*--^ ^-- I ^«w Ld do It - Bendy, Oh Aleck, I'm so glad to see you out. Ale ck Out? (Looks around,) Bendy ■ I meaji out of the station house ^ Aleck J V/ell, I'm glad to see you glad. Bendy ^r.^ ^ ^!i^ ^^ worried about you as if I ' d been - I 'd be en your mother „ j- u lg en AIg gIc III " ^^ ^^"^.°{ ^^"^y^ ^^* y°" Icok strange Bendy Oh I see you've washed your face, and fixed your hair! ' ' Bendy Yes, you see - this is Saturday.- Aleckc ^l.^Tl ^\" '^^- ^^ you'Te got a clean frock on. Have vou tried to stop using the slang, I wa^rrned you about-- ^ Be ndy Sure Mike i And I'm going to tie a can to it for keeps Oh say Aleck look out for Bronx Billy and Buzzard. They';e going to put up a job on you, ^ g^ing AIg nl<" Don't you worry little girl, I'm going to put uo a inh nr, them The fellow Bronx Billy who las going'^^o cSt re' Lto steaks, his name is V/illiam Baker, eh? ° Bendy Yep Y/illiam Baker, but he ought to be Y/illiam '^Butcher" 6-K ATLeckc Did you ever hear Mm spsak of a lady called Pearly. Bendy What - Pearl "Osborne," Tha t ' s the name > Bendy Why I seen her, sure, Pearl Osborne is a ''skirt" vaiat's stuck on himc Ale ck , A "skirt stuck on him"? I suppose that's, some more of your s Ian go ■ Bendy (Penitently) Oh I forgot. Pearl is or was his sweetheart, but he don't talk about her around here, he'd lose his meal ticket, with Mother T./landelbum, Pearl and her had an awful scrap over Billy, Pearl slammed Mother Mandelbum in the slats, and she chewed Pearl's ear off^, Aleck, I've got you, Bronx Billy, I've got you. Bendy Oh Aleck, go away from here or Billy vail get youo I don't know what you think you've got on liim but he's bad all through. Please go and go now, Aleck, it would kill me if anything happened to you, ^ ^ Als clc You like me little gal„ Bendy Like you? Ale eke I know I can trust you, Listen] (T&ies out pocket book) (shows letter) (Kizzie appears at door, she carries a small pitcher and glass) Al ©clc The man who murdered my brother wore a raincoatHarry must Imve made a fi^t for it, as the coat was found near the body all torn to pieces^ The murderer threw it aw§ry. The torn coat itself is not much clue but in the pocket vms found this ? J L -f 1^^^^^ addressed .as you see, (shov/s letter) and signed "Pearl Osborne" y cu u. Kiz zi e (Utters cry, staggers leans against door janb) (Aleck and Bendy turn. Aleck starts up towards Kizzie as if to assist Kiz zi e ' Thanks' Thanks,' Oh I'm all right. I'm a little lightheaded • i °! V f "^^^^'^ ''^S?'' to-day. (Aleck puts back letter m pQ©ket book m breast) Kizzie Bendy, haven't you nothing better to do than to stay up here, annoying this gent and him wanting to go to bed. Alecks She's good company, Mrs. Mandelbum, IJl^in^^'' *?^^° ^^ ^1^ '"°''^^ ^^^'^ ^^^^y^ stalling around'. Ge.t along with youj (Bendygoes up slowly pauses at door) l^Zf^^f^f^'^t ^^''' Smrt,' seeing as how much you like cider, that you'd like some more before you go to bed. (Pours out some m glass) Alecks That's real kind of you, sometimes v/hen I've a pint I sit up till ten o'clocko ^-^''^7 7-K ' - Bsr-dy Don't drink it, don't - don't-— Kle ck . Pshaw- cider ain't intoxicating. I can drink a tarrel of it c (drinks from glass) Kizzie (to Bendy) Get out or I'll change your map ed that your own mother if you had one couldn't tell you from Kid Broad » (Bendy with a despairing gesture exits door in flat) Kizzie Are you going to stay long in New York, Mro Smarts Alecko Just long enough to complete my business ^ Kizzie And what is your business? Ale ck , At present I am in the fancy iron business o (Exhibits hand-- cuffs) Heres a little incrention of my friend Van. Jiggins, It's called a patent regulator" I am going to try to unload it myself and get it on the hands of a couple of parties here in New York„ And when I do- I - I - (Yawns) I think I'll go back home. Say, I think I'm sleepy- (Puts handcuffs back in pocket) I'll - I'll go to - to bed if you don't mindo Good night I (Exits unsteadily L 2 E) Kizzie Tfeem knock out drops is angelic c I didn't have to give him a second dose. He* 11 be dead to the world in 'a minute s Y/hat did he mean by talking about that cat , Pearl Osborne to Bendy, That seemed to be a letter of "hern" that he had, (goes over cautiously to door L peeps in) He's thrown himself dov.ii on the bed, with his clothes ono Humphl He ain't no christian or he wouldn't do that I I'd better get on mj? "touch" jobo The effects of that mj.te of chloral hydrate won''t last long, (She exits cautiously L 2 e) Bendy (re-enters crosses quickly and quietly to R 3 E exits for couple of seconds repppears vrith vials) (Plolds it up) Kizzie 's smelling salts and aroinatic spirits of pneumonia that she uses to get over her jags* I'll watch my chance and wake him up» (Door L 2 E re-opens Kizzie re-enters Bendy draws behind screen at bac) Kizzie (Has pocket book and the Annihilator) I pinched his leather and the Annihilator, I guess I'll put the Annihilator in the bath tub and let the water run on it o (She locks door L 2 E leaving key on outside, then exits R 3 E) (Bendy steals down from behind screen unlocked door L 2 E taking key, exits and locks door from insice) Kizzie (Reoenters with pocket book in hand takes out bills counts them) Eighteen bucks. Well he ain't' no "Pierpont Morgan" "■ . never mindc I '' 11 put it in the banko (slips money into stocking) Now these papers., (goes, over papers, holds up letter) The letter., (Reads) Mr-, Y/illiam Baker'« The Home Hotel. 99 Chrystal St ^ and its from- that dameo I'll fix her for daring to write to my Billy„ (Takes out letter reads) "My own Darling Honey boy Bill:- I've got the use of Abe V/insbergs auto this week. See if you can't chloroform that old chromo Kizzie and we'll go to Coney's Isle together, and we'll have supper at the same joint as last Y/ednesday It just mabes me sick to think of my own sweetness being tied to an ugly \7ithered fossil old enough to be his mother^, ?ly the coop precious boy, and we'll go to Chicago, Get all you can get out of her, and then give her "rough on rats" Your baby Doll, - Pearl Osborne, ?)a Sp I send you a million kisses. 8-K ,Ohi OhJ Oh- (Walks to and fro in rage) 1^11 find her, I'll' spoil her face "chloroform that old chromo Kiszie" eh, and they mean me, me, and I've let him have my money. I've "been tfee t)est friend he ever ha,d,. I'll thro?/ acid in his fiace. 1,11-- and to think how J loved that m.an, oh the snake. Snakel (Sohs hysterically) (Enter Billy door in flat) Billy Hello Kizziel Have you done the joh? Kizzie' Yes, I,ve done it, I've done it ^ Billy What did you find. , Kizz'ie Oh I found enoughs Billy, Enough money, or enough what? Kizzie Enough to make me want to murder you, you dogo Chloroform that old chromo Kizzie' eh? Did you? Give me rough on rats. I'll rats" iDoth of you. Billy ^S/hat in hlazes are you talking aToout. Kizzie Oh, I'm T/ise novir, I know a^.j ahout you and Pearl Oshorne, ,. B;i.lly_, I thought ¥ire had hurled that,, I haven't seen her for a year » j;\.J.ZjZ .J, e Oh you liai o You liar ,-, • Billy You know I only love ycu^ ' Kizaie You crocodile. You snake-. Bii:,y See here, I am sick of your nagging, no-^j cut it out, or I'll shake you for goodo I am thinking of going to Chicago anyTT/ay » Kizzie So that hussy saido But you shan't trim me out of any money to go onr. • Billy I don't want your moneyc V/e'd 'better end this right now,. Give me that enveloije, I handed you to keep for meo Kizzie I haven't got it « Billy Don't lie to me. ' Kizzie Casey has it in the ss-fe, Billy Come down with me, and get it- Kizzie I \7 on ' t . Billy Yes you will, Kizzie I ViTon' t , Bi:i.l3' I want to raise some dough on it .> Kizzie I'm not going to help you to he happj' with that cat. 9-K You-|ll do as I tell you, or l ^ n persuade you in the usual You shall not, never again!^^^^ • ' ,' , CasiJ anJ\.Iy''You.5e'"Lf'^'^^ ^°^ ^'^ ^^^^^ ^° -^ -^°-t tear the whole pladtn ^.7 property in your room. Jlil l ooMng to me°'^?i?o':s'he?'lo^:S L) "'"' ' ' '" ^"."^ "^"'-'^ a??er\^"anl ^ra^^hl' 4^^^^''''-^ ^^^^^^^ ^^^ ^-^^t- (^-^ • struL?f^o?? H-^ ?^ ^m' ^® strikes her she screams, they struggle off together #3R E) (Noise continued off stkge) fr, , • -, s Xizzie Re-enfer liii' H^V' v^°^''' ^''°^''^^ ^^--^^' ^^-^ silence) are ??oodv w.^L t>.^°°^' ^^^^'^^ 1°°^^ ^^ ^^^ i^^^^s which / orta^L^d^Lt. ??^rr''^^?^^^"^^"^ ^^^^^ ^^^^ ^^ left key in lock door TP^^''^ ^^""^^^ ^-°°^ ^^ ^^-^^^ ^Sound of .o?e^^l^°:^y^°£LL| ^f??:?s TZillir' leading .Aleck who Bendy Here, let me open this T/indow„ The fresh air will brabe- von K iz zip - (Re-enters R 3 E She crawls on stage her clothing is tern and q^h^Sr'-'-'^ "^? ^'^ ^^'^^ ^^°"^ the%ffect 0? the^eatin^ - She moans as she drags herself along J Bendy - ' ' (As she turns from window, catches sight of KLazie and screams goes to her L Aleck staggers to feet, makes his > ' way^with difficulty and endeavors to assist Bendy who is " trying to help Kizzie to couch) j' v u is (S'aintly) Bendy- Phone for a^.octor, quick^XSinks on„couch)' r^ . Bendy "W^i. (On sign from Aleck, exits door at back) 6^ -V/?/^ ■ Aleck. ■ ^- ' (V/ho IS supporting Kizzie as she is seated on cou^>.v ' /q Who has done this? ^^^ A? Kizzie <^ Never kind I I'll get hunk, he shan = t live happy with }ier (sinks hack on pillow, head down stage) (In pain and sobbinff) Has Bendy gone? . . , ■ Al ec k. Yes , Kizzie " ' • Good littl-e scout, Bendy - I- - I don't want to go before ' ■ I tell her v/ho her folks are - Aleck . If you know, in God's name'tell me, . ', , • Kizzie Time enough J Time enough,? V/here did you get this D.etter from . that Osborne woman o Aleck . , •' (^'eels breast, realizes he has been robbed, takes letter.- which is crumpled up in Kizzie' s hand) I took it out of the pocket of the rain coat left by my brother' ' s murdererc ' Kizzie ■ '. . ' (Moans) It's him, my Godo It's him. Aleck. You know, speakl I don't want to make any mistake, and wrong the innocent , .-■.•- 10-K (ReQenters) The doctor is^'coSng as fast as he can' " A.16 ck Speak woman, Speak that justic; may l^e done, who is the mn. T,T^ -r t ^■^iz z i e No, I'm game, I never snitch on a pal, never, never, ■ AXcck witSi^i °^^n^^'''''-^^° ^°"'^ SO -before the thronG of grace ll m^?S ^ ''^°'' y°^^ ^°^1- Atone on earth that -you Toay claim mercy m Heaven, • Tviz zip (Is silent, except for lahcred breathing) Bendy She has fainted, ■ ■ ' Aleckc I fear she is dying oEendy, down on your knees with me, and let us pray, (Kneels) ' Bendy - ' (Kneels) I don't knov/ how to pray, Alecks Alecko Repeat after me, Bendy, (with feeling) "Our Pather- - who art m Heaven" (Bendy repeats) Hallowed he thy name I (Buzzard enters as prayer hegins; Alecko Thy Kingdom comeo Buzz3,rd ¥/hat stuff is this? Are you carrying on a Salvation Army meeting. Ale ck o (Rises, grahs Buzzard drags him to window, throv/s laim out falls on knees again) "Tliy will he done - on earth—- C U R T A ^ }]., ii II II i\ ii II ;;' 1-K Act Third, Sy'S disoolpf r^J' '^"^'^"S room of the Hon« Hotel. Aleck What little gal, are you up already? AT T -r -, Sendy ^!un/.STi\^''V° ^^'^■^^ ^11- I'^e heen sittinr up waiting and watching for you. Tell me, how is Mother Mandelbusi? Aa-G ck SJeadf ii^"-"'^' ^^i ^^S^^' ^^^"^^^ ^° 1^^^^ ^^^ hospital axready, she's a wonderful '^oman, the police tried to whJI.eYe?: ^^^^^^ >t ^i'!'"^'^'' 5 «^i. laside) Nov I'm sure he's off. I have scmethine herp ti^^°^' pocket) ^ ^' ^^1 ^^°^' It to youo (reaches in Invention eh*? an+ i+ w-; +v, "^ (Reaches for'A^eck'^ ?noV J°^' ..^"^ ^" ^^^^P ^^^'^ ^^^ i* ' as Billy has tothh^.J. .' Aleck -produces hand-cuffs cuffs oi ..,^?J-^l,^J^^^^^^,^ 3^3 a mSe to'' mou^fri ^^g^^'^'^^^- '^^-^ey'H i^old anything from ■ and I find%W ' ir ^^^^ ^^-""^ ""'' f°^^ legged cattle, aaughs) '^'" ^'^^^^ '°" ^"° l^Sged cattleT^Do you seL V X Billy. Se tVer^f^i *;^ '^-^ -■ "-^= '- °«. I» you ..ar, Al'^ck ■ Fo, :|: won't take 'em off, I^say, Billy Why not? . Als clc Because I've had too much trouhle to get them on. Billy Trapped h^ thunder, what do you want of me o I want your full confession of the cowardly murder of ' Captain Harry Smart, and by thmider I'm going to get it, Billy No you ain't» (Rushes on Aleck) (Endeavoring to strike him with hand-cuffs Aleck grapples" him, throws him on table) Aleckc Be quiet, dern you, or I'll throttle you with my hands before judge and jury get their chance « Billy,, Who the devil are you? Q^ /J.eck, Jr^y (throws off disguise) I'm Aleck Smart. DepSfeju a^«Lf f from up State, ' ^^>^^ Billyo ^^u' ^Qj And you're arresting me on sus-picion, eh = ^/f?^ « Aleck, '■ '^' I'm arresting you on a dead certainty;, Why this watch your wearing was my broths rso I gave it to him myself. Your traps here have been gone over b^'- the police, they found my brothers' coin purse, his v;ife made for him the shark's tooth he carried as a charma 7/illiam Baker I've got you dead to rights, and you'll be tried for m-order as sure as we are standing herea Billyo Look out, I've got a pull, and men with that, don't- suffer much when they're tried for murder in this old town, Aleck,; But you'll be tried up state William Baker, where your pull ain't vrorth a damn, come alongo Billyo- Say don't be in a hurry old man, Aleck, But I am in a hurry, a big huriy too^ Billy I v/as hired to do that job on your brothers ..