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 ^  AN 
 
 Account    of  the    L    I    F    E 
 
 of  the  late  Reverend 
 
 Mr    Dqpid    Brainerd^ 
 
 Miniftcrof  the  Gofpel, 
 
 Miifionary  to  the  Indians,  from  the  Honourable 
 Society  in  Scotland,  for  the  Propagation  of 
 Chriftian  Knowledge,  and  Paflor  of  a  Church 
 of  Chrijiian  hidians  in  New-Jerfey. 
 
 'W'ho  died  at  Northampton  in  New- England,  0£lober  9. 1747, 
 in  the  30th  Year  of  his  Age. 
 
 Chiefly  taken  from  his  bwn  Diary,   and  other  private  Wri- 
 tings, written  for  his  own  Ufe  ;   and  now  publiftied. 
 
 By    JONATHAN     EDWARDS,     A.  M. 
 
 Then  Minifter  of  the  Gofpel  at  Northampton,  afterwards 
 Prefident  of  the  College  of  New- Jcrfey. 
 
 To  which  is  annexed, 
 
 I.  Mr  Brainerd's  Jo  urinal  while  among  the  In- 
 dians. 
 
 II.  Mr  Pemberton's  Sermon  at  his  Ordina- 
 tion. With  an  Appendix  relative  to  the 
 Indian  Affairs. 
 
 EDINBURGH: 
 
 Printed    by    John    Gray   and   GAyin    Alstok. 
 
 Tor  W  I  L  L  I  A  M  G  R  A  Y  in  the  Front  of  the  Exchange. 
 
 MDCCLXV. 
 
THE 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 THERE  are  two  ways  of  reprefentlng  and  recominend- 
 ing  true  religion  and  virtue  to  tl;e  world,  which  God 
 hath  made  ufe  of;  the  one  is  by  doctrine  and  precept, 
 the  other  is  by  inftance  and  exainple ;  both  are  abun- 
 dantly ufed  in  the  holy  fcriptures.  Not  only  are  the 
 grounds,  nature,  defign,  and  importance  of  religion  clearly  ex- 
 hibited in  the  doflrines  of  fcrlpture,  and  its  exercife  and  prac- 
 tice plainly  delineated,  and  abundantly  enjoined  and  enforced, 
 in  its  commands  and  counfels ;  but  there  we  have  many  ex- 
 cellent examples  oi  religion,  in  its  power  and  practice,  fet  bc- 
 ,  fore  us,  in  the  hiflorics  both  of  the  Old  Teftament  and  New. 
 
 Jesus  Christ,  the  great    Prophet   of  God,  when   he 
 
 came  into  the  world  to  be  "  the  light  of  the  world,"  to  teach 
 and  enforce  true  religion,  in  a  greater  degree  than  ever  had 
 been  before,  he  made  ufe  of  both  thefe  methods.  In  his  doc- 
 trine he  declared  the  mind  and  will  of  God,  and  the'nature 
 and  properties  of  that  virtue  which  becomes  creatures  of 
 our  make  and  in  our  circumftances,  more  clearly  and  fully 
 than  ever  it  had  been  before,  and  more  powerfully  inforced 
 it  by  what  he  declared  of  the  obligations  and  inducements  to 
 hoUnefs;  and  he  alfo  in  his  own  praftice  gave  a  mod  perfe<5l" 
 example  of  the  virtue  he  taught.  He  exhibited  to  the  world 
 fuch  an  illuflrious  pattern  of  humility,  divine  love,  difcreet 
 zeal,  felf-dcnial,  obedience,  patience,  refignation,  fortitude, 
 raeeknefs,  forgivencfs,  compafCon,  benevolence,  and  univer- 
 fal  holinefs,  as  neither  men  nor  angels  ever  faw  before.  God 
 alfo  in  his  providence  has  been  wont  to  make  ufe  of  both  thefe 
 methods  to  hold  forth  light  to  mankind,  and  inducement  to 
 their  duty,  in  all  ages :  he  has  from  time  to  time  raifcd  up 
 eminent  teachers,  to  exhibit  and  bear  teflirnony  to  the  truth 
 in  their  dodvine,  and  oppofe  the  errors,  darknefs,  and  wicked- 
 nefs  of  the  world ;  and  alfo  has,  from  age  to  age,  raifcd  up 
 fome  eminent  perfons  that  have  fet  bright  examples  of  that 
 religion  that  is  taught  and  prefcribed  in  the  M'ord  of  God ; 
 whole  examples  have  in  divine  providence  been  let  forth  to 
 •public  view.  Thefe  have  a  great  teiVdency  to  .engage  the  at- 
 tention of  men  to  the  dodtrines  and  rules  that  are  taught,  and 
 greatly  to  confirm  and  enforce  them;  and  efpccially  when 
 thefe  bright  examples  have  been  exhibited  in  the  fame  per- 
 fons that  have  been  eminent  teachers y  fo  that  die  world  has 
 
 a  2  bad 
 
IV 
 
 THE    PREFACE. 
 
 had  opportunity  to  fee  fuch  a  confirmation  of  the  truth,  ef- 
 
 iicacy,  and  amiablencfs  of  the  religion  taught,  in  the  prafticc 
 of  the  fame  perfons  that  have  moll  clearly  and  forceably  taughD 
 It;  and  above  all,  when  thefe  bright  examples  have  beea 
 let  by  eniinent  teachers  in  a  vaiiety  of  unufual  circumftances 
 of  remarkable  trial;  and  God  has  withal  lemaikabiy  diltin- 
 guifhcd  them  with  wonderful ywrcf/ir  of  their  inftruftions  and 
 labours,  confifting  in  glorious  events  that  have  been  in  many 
 refpe^ls  new  and  ftrange. 
 
 Such  an  inflance  we  have  in  the  excellent  per/on,  whofe  life 
 is  publifhed  in  the  following  pages.  His  example  is  attended 
 with  a  great  variety  of  circuniftances,  tending  to  engage  the 
 attention  of  religious  people,  efpecially  in  thele  parts'  of  the 
 world :  he  was  one  of  diftinguiihed  natural  abilities ;  as  all 
 are  fenfible,  that  had  acquaintance  with  him :  he  was  a  mini- 
 ffer  of  the  gofpel,  and  one  vvhc;  was  called  to  unulual  iervices 
 in  that  work,  whofe  miniflry  was  attended  with  very  remark* 
 able  and  unufual  events,  an  account  of  which  has  already  been 
 given  to  the  public ;  one  whofe  courfe  of  religion  began  be- 
 fore the  late  times  of  extraordinary  religious  cummotion,  but 
 yet  one  that  lived  in  thofe  times,  and  went  through  them,  and 
 \vas  very  much  in  the  way  of  the  various  extraordinary  effcfts 
 and  unufual  appearances  of  that  day,  and  was  not  an  idle  Ipec- 
 tater,  but  had  a  near  concern  in  many  things  that  pafled  at 
 that  time  ;  one  that  had  a  very  extenlive  acquaintance  with 
 thofe  that  have  been  the  fubjedfs  of  the  late  religious  opera- 
 tions, in  many  of  thefe  Britifli  colonies,  in  places  far  diflant 
 one  from  another,  in  people  of  many  different  nations,  of  dif- 
 ferent educations,  manners,  and  cufioms  ;  one  who  had  pecu- 
 liar opportunity  of  acquaintance  with  the  falfe  appearances 
 and  counterfeits  of  rt  ligion  :  one  who  himfelf  was  the  inllru- 
 mcnt  of  a  moft  remarkable  awakening,  and  an  exceeding 
 wonderful  and  abiding  alteration  and  moral  transforaiation  of 
 fuch  fubjefls  as  do  peculiarly  render  the  change  rare  and  a- 
 ftonifhing. 
 
 In  the  following  account,  the  reader  will  have  opportunity 
 to  fee,  not  only  what  were  the  external  circumflances  and  le- 
 markable  incidents  of  the  life  of  this  ptrfor,  and  how  he 
 fpcnt  his  time  from  day  to  day,  as  to  his  external  behaviour; 
 but  alfo  what  pafTed  in  his  own  heart,  the  wonderful  change 
 that  he  experienced  in  his  mind  and  dilpofition,  the  manner 
 in  M'hich  that  change  was  brought  to  pals,  how  it  continued, 
 ■wf  at  were  its  corfequences  in  his  inward  frames,  thoughts, 
 affeflions,  ard  fccict  cxcrcifes,  through  many  vicifTitudes  and 
 liials,  Jicm  ihcrxclbith  for  mere  thsn  eight  years,  till  his 
 
 d^ath ', 
 
THEPREFACE.  V 
 
 ^eath ;  and  alfo  to  fee  how  all  ended  at  laft,  in  his  fentiments, 
 frame,  and  behaviour,  during  a  long  feafon  of  the  gradual  and 
 fenllblc  approach  of  death,  under  a  lingering  illnelb,  and  what 
 were  the  etFe(Sls  of  his  religion  in  dying  circumftances,  or  in 
 the  laft  ftages  of  his  dying  illnefs.  The  account  being  written, 
 the  reader  may  have  opportunity  at  his  leifure  to  compare  the 
 various  parts  of  the  ftory,  and  deliberately  to  view  and  weigh 
 the  whole,  and  confider  how  far  what  is  related  is  agreeable 
 to  the  dictates  of  right  reafon  and  the  holy  word  of  God. 
 
 I  am  far  from  luppofmg,  that  Mr  Brainerd's  inv.'ard  exer- 
 cifes  and  experiences,  or  his  external  conduft,  were  tree 
 from  all  imperfedion:  the  example  oi  Jejus  Chr'tfi  is  the  on- 
 ly example  that  ever  was  fet  in  the  human  nature,  that  was 
 altogethei  perfeft;  which  therefore  is  a  rule,  to  try  all  ott^.er 
 examples  by ;  and  the  difpofitiuns,  frames,  and  practices  of 
 others  niuft  be  commended  and  followed  no  further,  than  they 
 .-were /b/Zouif rj-  of  Chrijl, 
 
 There  is  one  thing  in  Mr  Brainerd,  eafily  difcernible  by 
 the  following  account  of  his  life,  that  may  be  called  an  im- 
 perfeftion  in  him,  which  though  not  piopeily  an  imperfec- 
 tion of  a  moral  nature,  yet  may  polTibly  be  made  an  objec- 
 tion againft  the  extraordinary  appearances  of  religion  and  de- 
 votion in  him,  by  fuch  as  feck  for  objeftions  againft  £very 
 thing  that  can  be  produced  in  favour  of  true  vital  religion; 
 and  that  is,  that  he  was  one  who  by  his  conftitution  and  na- 
 tural temper  was  io  prone  to  melancholy  and  dejeflion  of  fpi- 
 rit.  There  are  fome  who  think  that  all  ferious  ftri(5t  religion 
 is  a  melancholy  thing,  and  that  what  is  called  Chriftian  expe- 
 rience, is  little  elfe  befides  melancholy  vapours  difturbing  the 
 brain,  and  exciting  enthufiaftical  imaginations.  But  that  Mr 
 Brainerd's  temper  or  conftitution  inclined  him  to  deiponden- 
 cy,  is  no  juft  ground  to  fufpeft  his  extraordinary  devotion, 
 as  being  only  the  fruit  of  a  warm  imagination.  I  doubt  not 
 but  that  all  who  have  well  obferved  mankind,  will  readily 
 grant  this,  that  it  is  not  all  thofe  who  by  their  natural  confti- 
 tution or  temper  are  moft  difpofed  to  deje£iion,  that  are  the 
 perfons  who  are  the  moft  fufceptive  of  lively  .nnd  ftrong  im- 
 prelfions  on  their  imagination,  or  the  moft  fubjccf  to  thofe 
 vehement  impetuous  affe^lions,  which  are  the  fruits  of  iuch 
 impreflions ;  but  tnat  many  who  are  of  a  very  gay  and /anguine 
 natural  temper  are  vaftly  more  fo,  and  if  their  aifedions  are 
 turned  into  a  religious  channel,  are  much  more  cxpofed  to 
 efithufiafm,  than  many  of  the  former.  And  as  to  Mr  Brainerd 
 in  particular,  notwithftanding  his  inclination  to  defpondency, 
 he  was  evidently  one  of  tliat  fort  of  perfons  who  ufually  are 
 
 the 
 
vi  THEPREFACE.  1 
 
 the  furthefl  from  a  teeming  imagination;  being  one  of  a, pe- 
 netrating genius,  of  clear  thought,  of  ^lofe  reafoning,  and  a 
 very  exafl  judgment ;  as  all  know,  that  knew  him.  As  ^hc 
 had  a  great  inllght  into  human  nature,  and  was  very  dijcern- 
 ing  and  judicious  in  thing:-  in  general,  fo  he  excelled  in  his 
 judgment  and  knowledge  of  things  in  divinity,  but  efptcially 
 in  things  appertaining  to  inward  experimental  religion^moit 
 accurately  diftinguiiliing  between  real  fclid  piety  and  ^Ipu^- 
 alm,  between  thofe  aifc(ftions  that  are  rational  and  (ci^iptural, 
 having  their  foundation  in  light  and  judgment,  and  thoie  that 
 are  founded  in  whimhcal  conceits,  ftrong  imprelHons  on  the 
 Tmagination,  and  thoie  vehement  emotions  ot  the  animal 
 fpirits  that  arife  from  them.  He  was  exceeding  fenfibie  of 
 mens  expolednefs  to  thefe  things,  how  much  they  had  pre- 
 Tailed,  and  what  multitudes  had  been  deceived  by  them,  of 
 the  pernicious  confequences  of  them,  and  the  fearful  mif- 
 chi^f  they  hai  done  in  the  Chtiftian  world.  He  greatly  ab- 
 horred luch  a  fort  oi  religion, 'and  was  abundant  in  bearing 
 teflimony  againft  it,  living  anrf^dying  ;  and  was  quick  to  dil- 
 cern  when  any  thing  of  that  n^ure  arofe,  though  in  its  firft 
 buddings,  and  appearing  under  the  moft  fair  and  plaufible  dil- 
 guifes;  and  had  that  taleife  at  pcfcribing  the  various  workings 
 of  this  imaginary  enthufufihcal  religion,  evincing  the  falle- 
 nefs  and  vanity  c^Pit,  and  cfepionflrating  the  great  difference 
 between  this  and   true  fpirilual  devotion,  which   I   fcarcely 
 
 ever  knew  equalled  in  any  other  perfon. And  his  judi- 
 
 cioufnefs  did  not  only  appeal:  in  diftinguifhing  among  the  ex- 
 periences of  ethers,  but  alfo  among  the  various  exerciles  ot 
 his  o-ivn  mind ;  and  particularly  in  difcerning  what  within  him- 
 iclf  was  to  be  laid  to  the  Icore  of  ?riel/inchdy  ;  in  which  he  ex- 
 ceeded all  melancholy  perfons  that  ever  I  was  acquainted  with, 
 (though  I  hare  been  in  xht  way  of  acquaintance  with  very 
 many);  which  was  doubtlefs  owin^  to  a  peculiar  flrength  in 
 his  Judgment :  it  is  a  rare  thing  indeed,  that  melancholy  people 
 are  well  fenfibie  of  their  own  difeafe,  and  fully  convinced' that 
 fuch  and  fuch  things  are  to  be  afcribed  to  it,  as  are  indeed  its 
 genuine  operations  and  fruits. Mr  Braincrd  did  not  ob- 
 tain thct  degree  of  ikill,  v»hich  he  had  in  this  matter,  at  once, 
 but  gained  it  gradually :  as  the  reader  may  cilcern  by  the  fol- 
 lowing account  of  his  life.  In  the  former  part  ot  his  reli- 
 gious courfe,  he  imputed  much  of  that  kind  of  gloominefs  of 
 mmd  and  thofe  dark  thoughts,  to  fpiritual  ^c/f r/icn,  ^which 
 '  in  the  latter  part  of  his  life,  he  was  abundantly  fenfibie,  were 
 owing  to  the  difeafe  oi  met anc holy  ;  accordingly  he  often  cx- 
 prefs'iv  fpcaks  cf  I^cta^  in  his  diary  as  arifing  from  this  caufc  ; 
 
 and 
 
T  H  E     P  R  E  F  A  C  E.  vii 
 
 ind  he  was  often  ia  converfation  fpeaking  of  the  difference 
 between  melancholy  and  godly  forrow,  true  humiliation,  and 
 foiritual  defertion,  and  the  great  danger  of  miftaking  the  one 
 for  the  other,  and  the  very  hurtful  nature  of  melancholy,  dif- 
 courling  with  great  judgment  upon  it,  and  doubtlefa  much 
 more  JLididoufly  for  what  he  knew  by  his  ow^l^xperience. 
 
 But  befides  what  may  be  argued  from  Mr  Brainerd's 
 ftrength  of  jtidgment,  it  is  apparent  infat^,  that  he  was  not 
 a  perfon  of  a  warm  imagination.  His  inward  experiences, 
 either  in  hisjconvi>5tion5  or  his  converfion,  and  his  religious 
 views  and  ipipreifions  through  the  ccurle  of  his  life  to  his 
 death,  (of  jrBich  he  has  left  a  very  particular  account),  none  of 
 them  ceased  in,  or  were  excited  by,  ftrong  and  lively  i- 
 mages  ^wrned  in  his  ini^ination ;  there  is  nothing  at  all  ap- 
 pears'6f  it  in  his  diary,  from  beginning  to  end  ;  yea,  he  told 
 me*  on  his  death-bed,  that,  although  once  when  he  was  very 
 young  in  years  and  in  experience,  he  was  deceived  into  a  high 
 opinion  of  fuch  things,  lookmg  on  them  as  fuperior  attain- 
 ments in  religion,  beyond  what  he  had  ever  arrived  to,  and 
 was  ambitious  of  them  and  earneftly  fought  them,  yet  he  ne- 
 ver could  obtain  them ;  and  that  he  never  in  his  life  had  a 
 ftrong  impreflion  on  his  imagination,  of  any  vifage,  outward 
 form,  external  glory,  or  any  other  thing  of  that  nature ; 
 which  kind  of  impreffions  abound  among  the  wild  enthufiaftic 
 people  of  the  late  and  prefent  day. 
 
 As  Mr  Brainerd's  religious  imprefTions,  views,  and  affec- 
 tions in  their  nature  were  vaftly  different  from  enthuiiafm,  fo 
 were  their  effe^s  in  him  as  contrary  as  poffible  to  the  ordi- 
 nary effe(ft3  of  that.  Nothing  fo  puffs  men  up,  as  enthufiafwy 
 with  a  high  conceit  of  their  osvn  v/ifdom,  holinefs,  eminency, 
 and  fufficicncy,  and  makes  them  fo  bold,  forward,  affiiming,  acd 
 arrofrant:  but  the  reader  will  fee,  that  Mr  Brainerd's  religion 
 conftaatly  difpofed  him  to  a  feoff  mean  thought  of  himfelf, 
 an  abafing  fenfe  of  his  own  exceeding  finfulnefs,  deficienc)', 
 -unprofitablenefs,  and  ignorance  ;  locking  on  himfelf  as  worfc 
 than  others  ;  difpofmg  him  to  univerfai  benevolence,  raeek- 
 neis,  and  in  honour-  to  prefer  others,  and  to  treat  ail  with 
 kindnefs  and  refpefl.  And  when  melanchzly  prevailed,  though 
 the  effefts  of  it  were  very  prejudicial  to  him,  yet  it  had  not 
 -thofe  effects  of  ent.hu fiajhi ;  but  operated  by  dark  and  difcou- 
 raging  thoughts  of  himfelf,  as  ignorant,  wicked,  and  wholly 
 unfit  for  the  work  of  the  miniftry,  or  even  to  be  feen  among 
 
 mankind,  oc- Indeed,  at  the  time  forementioned,  when 
 
 he  had  not  learned  well  to  diftinguifh  between  cntliufiafm  and 
 lolid  religion,   he  joining  and  keeping  company  wirh  foxe 
 
 that 
 
viii  THE    PREFACE. 
 
 that  vfevi  tinged  with  no  fmall  degree  of  the  former,  for  a' 
 feafon  partook  with  them  in  a  degree  of  their  difpofitions  and 
 behaviours  ;  though,  as  was  obferved  before,  he  could  not  ob- 
 tain thofe  things  wherein  their  enthujiafm  itfelf  confifted,  and 
 fo  could  not  become  like  them  in  that  refpeifl:,  however  he  er- 
 roneoufly  defired  and  fought  it.  But  certainly  it  is  not  at  all 
 to  be  wondered  at,  that  a  youth  and  a  young  convert,  one 
 that  had  his  heart  fo  fwailowed  up  in  religion,  and  fo  earneft- 
 ly  defired  the  flourifhing  of  it,  but  had  had  fo  little  opportunity 
 for  reading,  obfervation,  and  experience,  fhould  for  a  while 
 be  dazzled  and  deceived  with  the  glaring  appearances  of  that 
 miftakcn  devotion  and  zsal ;  efpecially  confidering  what  the 
 extraordinary  circumftancfes  of  that  day  were.  He  told  me 
 on  his  death-bed,  that  while  he  was  in  thefe  circamftances  he 
 was  out  of  his  element,  and  did  violence  to  himfelf,  while 
 complying,  in  his  conduct,  with  pcrfons  of  a  fierce  and  im- 
 prudent zeal,  from  his  great  veneration  of  fome  that  he  look- 
 ed upon  much  better  than  himfelf.  So  that  it  would  be  very 
 unreafonable,  that  his  error  at  that  time  fhould  neverthelefs 
 be  efteeraed  a  juft  ground  of  prejudice  againft  the  whole  of  his 
 religion,  and  his  charafter  in  general ;  efpecially  confidering, 
 -  how  greatly  his  mind  was  foon  changed,  and  how  exceedingly 
 he  afterwards  lamented  his  error,  and  abhorred  himfelf  for 
 his  imprudent  zeal  and  mifconduft  at  that  time,  even  to  the 
 breaking  of  his  heart,  and  almoft;  to  the  overbearing  and  break- 
 ing the  flrength  of  his  nature;  and  how  much  of  a  Chriflian 
 fpirit  he  fhewed,  in  his  condemning  himfelf  for  that  mifcon- 
 tluft,  as  the  reader  will  fee. 
 
 What  has  been  now  mentioned  of  Mr  Brainerd,  is  fo  far 
 from  being  juft  ground  of  prejudice  againft  what  is  related 
 in  the  following  account  of  his  life,  that,  if  duly  confidered, 
 it  will  render  the  hiftory  the  more  ferviceable.  For  by  his  thus 
 joining  for  a  feafon  with  enthufwfis,  he  had  a  more  full  and 
 intimate  acquaintance  with  what  belonged  to  that  fort  of  re- 
 ligion, and  fo  was  under  better  advantages  to  judge  of  the  dif- 
 ference between  that  and  the  other,  which  he  finally  approved 
 and  firove  to  his  utmofl:  to  promote,  in  oppolition  to  it :  and 
 hereby  the  reader  has  the  more  to  demonftrate  to  him,  that 
 Mr  Brainerd,  in  his  teftimony  againft  it,  and  the  fpirit  and  be- 
 haviour of  thofe  that  are  influenced  by  it,  fpeaks  from  impar- 
 tial conviftlon,  and  not  from  prejudice  ;  becaufe  therein  he 
 «penly  condemns  his  own  former  opinion  and  condudl,  on 
 account  of  which  he  had  greatly  fuffered  from  his  oppofers, 
 and  for  M'hich  fome  continued  to  reproach  him  as  long  as  he 
 fivcd. 
 
 Another 
 
T  H  E     P  R  E  F  A  C  E.  ix 
 
 Another  imperfeclion  m  Mr  Brainerd,  which  may  be  ob« 
 fcrved  in  the  iAlomng  ace  junt  of  his  lire,  \vas  his  b-  ing  ex- 
 celflvs  in  his  labours ;  not  taking  due  care  to  proportion  his 
 fatigues  to  his  itrength.  Indeed  the  cale  was  very  often  fo, 
 and  luch  the  feeaiing  calls  of  Providence^  that  it  was  extreme- 
 ly difficult  f jr  him  to  avoid  doing  more  than  his  ftraigth 
 would  well  adiiit  of;  yea,  his  circumftances,  and  the  bufincfs 
 of  Ins  mlffi  >n  among  the  Indians,  were  fuch,  that  great  fa- 
 tigues and  hardlhips  were  altogether  inevitable.  Hav/ever, 
 he  was  finally  convinced,  that  he  had  erred  in  this  matter,  and 
 that  he  ougnt  to  have  taken  more  thorough  care,  and  been 
 more  refjlute  to  withftand  temptations  to  fuch  degrees  of  la- 
 bour as  injured  his  health  ;  and  accordingly  warned  his  bro- 
 ther, who  fucceeds  him  in  his  miffion,  to  be  careful  to  avoid 
 this  error. 
 
 Behdes  the  impcrfe£lions  already  mentioned,  it  is  readily 
 allowed,  that  there  were  fome  imperfections  that  ran  through 
 his  v/hole  life,  and  were  mixed  with  all  his  religious  alfeftions 
 and  excrcifes,  fome  mixture  of  what  was  natural  with  that 
 which  was  fpiritual;  as  it  evermore  is  in  the  beft  flints  in  this 
 world.  Doubtlefs  there  was  fome  influence  that  naturd  tem- 
 per had  in  the  religious  exercifes  and  experiences  of  Mr  Brai- 
 nerd, as  there  moi^  apparently  was  in  the  exercifes  of  devout 
 David,  and  the  apoftles  Peter,  John,  and  Paul :  there  was 
 undoubtedly  very  often  fome  influence  of  his  natural  difpoli- 
 tion  to  dejection  in  his  religious  m.ourning,  fome  mixture  of 
 melancholy  with  truly  godly  forrow  and  real  Chriftian  humi- 
 lit}',  and  fome  mixture  of  the  natural  hre  of  youth  with  lils 
 holy  ieal  for  God,  and  fome  influence  of  natural  principles 
 mixed  with  grace  in  various  other  refptft^,  as  it  ever  was  and 
 ever  will  be  with  the  faints  while  on  this  fide  heaven.  Per- 
 haps none  were  more  fenfible  of  Mr  Braincrd's  imperfe£lions 
 than  he  himfclf;  or  could  diftinguiili  more  accurately,  than  he, 
 between  v/hat  was  natural  and  what  v/as  fpiritual.  It  is  eafy 
 for  the  judicious  reader  to  obferve,  that  his  graces  ripened, 
 and  the  religious  excrcifts  of  his  heart  became  more  and  more- 
 pure,  and  he  more  and  more  diftinguiihing  in  his  judgment 
 the  longer  he  lived  ;  h.e  had  much  to  teach  and  purify  him, 
 and  he  failed  not  to  make  his  advantage  thereb3^ 
 
 But  notwithitanding  all  thcfe  imperfections,  I  am  peifua- 
 ded,  every  pious  and  judicious  reader  will  acknowledge,  that 
 what  is  here  fet  before  him  is  indeed  a  remarkable  inliancc  of 
 true  and  eminent  Chriftian  piety  in  heart  ancfprardce,  tending 
 greatly  to  confirm  the  reality  of  vital  religion,  and  the  powcv 
 
 b  of 
 
X  THEPREFACE. 
 
 of  gocUinefs,  mofl  worthy  of  imitation,  and  many  ways  tend- 
 ing  to  the  fpiritual  benefit  of  the  careful  obferver. 
 
 It  is  Ht  the  reader  /houid  be  aware,  that  what  Mr  Brainerd 
 wrote  in  his  diary,  out  of  which  the  following  account  of  his 
 life  is  chiefly  taken,'  was  written  only  for  his  own  private  ufe, 
 and  not  to  get  honour  and  applaufe  in  the  world,  nor  with  a- 
 ny  defign  that  the  world  fliould  ever  fee  it,  either  while  he  li- 
 ved or  after  his  death,  excepting  fome  few  things  that  he 
 ^^rote  in  a  dying  ftate,  after  he  had  been  perfuaded,  with  dif- 
 ficult}'',  not  entirely  to  fupprefs  all  his  private  writings.  He 
 ihewed  hirafelf  almofl  invincibly  averfe  to  the  publifhing  of  a- 
 ry  part  of  his  diary  after  bis  death  ;  and  when  he  was  thought 
 to  be  dying  at  B-'fton,  gave  the  mod  ftrift  peremptory 
 orders  to  the  contrary:  but  being  by  fome  of  his  friends  there 
 prevailed  upon  to  withdraw  fo  ftri^^  and  abfolute  a  prohibi- 
 tion, he  was  pleafed  finally  to  yield  fo  far  as  that  "his  papers 
 *'  fhould  be  left  in  my  hands,  that  I  might  difpofe  of  them  as 
 *'  I  thought  would  be  moft  for  God's  glory  and  the  intereA  of 
 
 "  religion/' But  a  few  days  before  his  death,  he  ordered 
 
 fome  part  of  his  diaty  to  be  deftroyed,  (as  will  afterwards  be 
 obferved),  which  renders  the  account  of  his  life  the  lefs  com- 
 plete. And  there  are  fome  parts  of  his  diayy  here  left  out 
 tor  brevity's  lake,  that  would  (I  am  fenfible)  have  been  a  great 
 advantage  to  the  hiflory,  if  they  had  been  inferted ;  particu- 
 laily  the  account  of  his  wonderful  fucceffes  among  the  Indians; 
 which  for  fubftance  is  the  fame  in  his  private  diary  with  that 
 which  has  already  been  made  public,  in  the  Journal  he  kept 
 hy  order  of  the  Society  in  Scotland,  for  their  information. 
 That  account,  I  am  of  opinion,  would  be  more  entertaining 
 and  more  profitable,  if  it  were  publifhed  as  it  is  written  in  his 
 diary,  in  connection  with  his  fecret  religion  and  the  inward 
 excrcifes  of  his  mind,  and  alfo  with  the  preceding  and  follow- 
 ing parts  of  the  ftory  of  his  life.  But  becaufe  that  account 
 has  been  publifhed  already,  and  becaufe  the  adding  it  here 
 would  make  the  book  much  more  bulky  and  more  colfly, 
 which  might  tend  to  difcourage  the  purchafe  and  perufal  of  it, 
 and  fo  render  it  lefs  extenfiveiy  ufeful,  I  have  therefore  omit- 
 ted that  part.  However,  this  defeft  may  in  a  great  meafure 
 be  made  up  to  the  reader,  by  his  purchafing  his  public  Jour- 
 val,  and  reading  it  in  its  place,  with  this  hiftory  of  his  life ; 
 which  undoubtedly  would  be  well  worth  the  while  for  every 
 reader,  and  would  richly  recompenfc  the  additional  coft  of 
 the  purchafe.  J  hope  therefore,  that  thofe  of  my  readers 
 ^vho  are  not  furniilicd  with  that  booh,  will,  for  their  own  pro- 
 fit and  entertainment,  and  r.hat  they  may  have  the  ftory  of 
 
T  H  E     P  R  E  F  A  C  E.  xi 
 
 this  excellent  perfon  more  complete,  procure  one  of  thofe 
 books ;  without  v/hich  he  muft  have  a  very  imperfeft  view  of 
 the  mod  important  part  of  his  life,  and  (on  fome  accounts) 
 
 of  the  moft  remarkable   and  wonderful  things  in  it  *. 1 
 
 fhould  alfo  obferve,  that  befides  that  book,  and  antecedent  to 
 it,  there  is  a  narrative  relating  to  the  Indian  affairs,  amiexed 
 to  Mr  Pemberton's  fermon  at  Mr  Brainerd's  ordination  f ; 
 which  likewile  may  the  more  profitably  be  read  in  conjun£lion 
 with  his  diary  previous  to  November  5.  1744. 
 
 But  it  is  time  to  end  this  preface,  that  the  reader  may  be  no 
 longer  detained  from  the  hiflory  itfelf. 
 
 N.  B.  Thofe  parts  of  the  following  hiftory  that  are  inclu* 
 ded  between  brackets  thus  [  ],  are  the  words  of  the 
 publijher,  for  the  mod  part,  fummarily  reprefenting 
 (for  brevity's  fake)  the  fubftance  or  chief  things  contain- 
 ed in  Mr  Brainerd's  diary,  for  fuch  a  certain  fpaee  of 
 time  as  is  there  fpecified :  the  reft  is  the  account  that 
 he  gives  of  himlelf  in  his  private  writings,  in  his  own 
 words. 
 
 I  prefume,  fcarce  any  reader  needs  to  be  told,  that  [^J.  MtJ^ 
 on  the  top  of  the  page,  fignifies,  the  year  of  his  age, 
 and  \_A.  Z).  ]  the  year  of  our  Lord. 
 
 *  To  fupply  the  defe<51-  here  mentiored,  the  publlfher  of  this  e- 
 ditlon  of  Mr  Brainerd's  life  procured  a  copy  of  the  Joarnal  referred 
 to,  which  the  reader  will  find  fubjoined  at  the  end  of  the  life. 
 
 f  In  order  that  Mr  Brainerd's  life  might  be  complete,  the  read- 
 er will  alfo  have  the  pleafure  of  perufing,  at  the  end  of  the  Jour- 
 nal, Mr  Pen "berton  s  fermon,  together  with  the  narrative  relating 
 to  the  Indian  affairs,  here  referred  to. 
 
Edinburgh,  March  i8.  176;. 
 
 PROPOSALS 
 
 For  printing,   by    Subscription, 
 
 A  TREATISE  concerning  Religious 
 
 Affections. 
 
 In  three  parts. 
 
 Part  i.  Concerning  the  nature  of  the  aife£lions,  and  their 
 importance  in  religion. 
 
 Part  2.  Shewing  what  are  no  certain  figtis  that  religious  af- 
 feftions  are  gracious,  or  that  they  are  not. 
 
 Part  3.  Shewing  what  are  diftinguifhing  figns  of  truly  gra- 
 cious and  holy  affections. 
 
 By   JONATHAN    EDWARDS,    A.M. 
 
 Prcfident  of  the  College  of  New- Jerfey. 
 
 CONDITIONS. 
 
 J.  The  book  will  be  printed  on  a  coarfe  and  fine  paper,  and  on  the 
 fame  type  with  the  Life  and  Journal  of  Mr  David  Brainerd. 
 
 n.  It  will  confift  of  about  400  pages  large  8vo,  and  will  be  deliver- 
 ed to  fubfcribers  the  fine  paper  neatly  bound  in  calf  at  4  s.  6  d. 
 and  the  coarfe  paper  neatly  bound  in  fheep  at  ^s.  6d.  The 
 price,  when  publifhed,  will  be  raifed  to  non- fubfcribers,  the  fine 
 to  5  s,  the  coarfe  to  4  s. 
 
 III.  The  book  will  be  put  to  the  prefs  as  foon  as  200  copies  are  fub-* 
 fcribed  for. 
 
 A  formal  recommendation  of  this  treatlfc  is  unnecefTary.  The  fijbjefl  treit- 
 fd  of  h  of  the  utmoft  importance,  even  the  nature  of  true  religion,  and  the 
 diftinguilhing  marks  of  genuine  holinefs  and  virtue.  The  em/ient  piety  of  th< 
 author,  his  penetrating  philofophical  genius,  his  freedom  from  the  leaft  tinc- 
 ture of  Enthufiafin,  and  the  uncommon  religious  appearances  in  New-England, 
 of  vvhich  he  had  been  long  an  attentive  and  critical  obierver,  afforded  him  pe- 
 culiar advantages,  for  condufang  fo  difficult  an  inquiry  with  judgment  and 
 precifion.  Accordingly  the  book  was  fo  well  received,  that  an  impreffion  of 
 near  1500  copies  was  foon  fold  off.  An  CKcellent  abridgment  of  it  has  been 
 pi:b!i(hed  by  the  Reverend  Mr  Gordon  at  London.  It  is  hoped,  that  through 
 the  bleffing  of  God,  the  republi.liing  the  complete  treatife  may  prove  a  feafon- 
 able  prefervative  againft  the  increafing  evils  of  formality  on  the  one  hand, 
 and  Enthufiafin  on  the  other;  while  fome  imagine  that  vigorous  lively  aifcc- 
 lions  in  religion  are  unnecelFary,  nay,  are  to  be  guarded  againfl:  as  of  perni- 
 cious tendency;  and  while  others,  without  inquiring  into  the  nature,  fource, 
 and  effefts  of  religious  affe£lions,  rafhiy  conclude,  that  every  one  is  truly  gra- 
 cious, who  appears  to  be  much  moved  by  divine  things,  and  expreffes  him- 
 fclf  about  them  with  warmth  and  earneftnefs. 
 
 It  is  Intreated,  that  all  who  are  for  encouraging  thcfe  propofals,  will  (end  in 
 tl'.eir  names,  defgnations,  and  places  of  abode  in.mediateljr,  to  WILLIAM 
 GRAY  the  Publilher,  front  of  the  Exchange,  Edinburgh,  that  the  book  may 
 fee  put  to  the  prefs  without  lofs  of  time. 
 
An    Account 
 Of    the    L  I  F  E    of 
 
 The  late  Reverend 
 
 Mr    David   Brainerd. 
 
 PART        I. 
 
 From  his  h'lrth,  to  the  time  when  he  began  to 
 devote  himfelf  to  thtjiudy  of  divinity,  in  or- 
 der to  his  being  fitted  for  the  work  of  the 
 miniflry. 
 
 ["^  y^R  David  Erainerd  v/as  born  April  20.  1718,  at 
 Haddam,  a  town  belonging  to  the  county  of 
 Hartford,  in  the  colony  of  Ccnnecricut,  New- 
 England.  His  father,  who  died  when  thi"-  his 
 fon  was  about  nine  years  of  age,  was  the  WorfnipfLil  IIe» 
 zekiah  Brainerd  Elq;  an  affiftant,  or  one  of  his  Majedy's 
 council  for  that  colony,  and  the  fon  of  Daniel  Brainerd  Elq; 
 a  juftice  of  the  peace,  and  a  deacon  of  the  church  of  Chrifi: 
 in  Haddai:n.  His  mothcii-  was  Mrs  Dorothy  Hobart,  daugh- 
 ter to  the  Reverend  r»Ir  Jeremiah  Hobart,  who  preached 
 a  while  at  Topsfield,  and  then  removed  to  Hempftcad 
 on  Long-Il'iand,  and  afterwards  removed  from  Hcmp- 
 ftcad,  (by  reafcn  of  numbers  turning  Quakers,  and  many  o- 
 thers  being  fo  irreligious,  that  they  would  do  nothing  tovi'ards 
 the  fupport  of  the  iraniftry),  and  came  and  fettled  in  the 
 work  of  the  minifoy  at  Haddam ;  where  he  died  in  the  85th 
 year  of  his  age  :  of  whom  it  is  remarkable,  that  he  went 
 to  the  public  worfhip  in  the  forenoon,  and  died  in  his  chair 
 between  meetings.  And  this  reverend  gentleman  was  fon  of 
 the  Reverend  Mr  Peter  Hobart,  who  was,  finl,  m/miflcr  of 
 'the  gofpel  at   Hingham,  in  the  county  of  Norfolk  in  Eng- 
 
 A  land ; 
 
a  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F 
 
 knd ;  a:iH,  by  rcafon  of  the  pcrfccurion  of  the  Puritans,  remo-' 
 veJ  Willi  his  family  to  New-England,  anJ  was  fettled  in  tiic 
 rniniftry  at  Hingham,  in  the  Maffachufetts.  He  had  five  fons, 
 7>iz.  Jofh'.ia,  Jeremiah,  Gcrfliom,  Japheth,  and  Nehemiah. 
 Mis  fon  Joihua  was  miniiler  at  Southold  on  Long-Ifland;  Je- 
 ren-iiah  was-  Mr  David  Erainerd's  grandfather,  minifler  at 
 HadJaiTi,  6c.  as  was  before  obferved  ;  Gcrihoni  was  niinifter 
 of  Groton  in  Conneflicut  ;  Japheth  was  a  phyfician,  and 
 went  in  the  quality  of  a  doftor  of  a  fhip  to  En-Tland,  (before 
 the  time  for  the  taking  his  fecond  degree  at  college),  and  de- 
 flgneJ  to  go  from  dience  to  th'e  Eafl- Indies,  and  never  was 
 heard  of  more  ;- Nehemiah  was  fometime  fellow  of  Harvard 
 cjiiege,  and  afterwards  minifler  at  Newton  in  the  MafTachu- 
 fett^.  The  naother  of  Mrs  Dorothy  Hobart  (who  was  after- 
 wards Brainerd)  was  d::'jghter  to  the  Reverend  Mr  Samuel 
 V/hiting,  rainillcr  of  the  gofpel,  firfl  at  Bofton  in  Lincoln- 
 /Iiire,  and  afterwards  at  Lynn  in  the  r^Iaffachufetts,  New- 
 Englan;!  :  he  had  three  lous  that  were  minifters  of  the  gofpel. 
 Mr  David  Brainerd  was  the  third  (on  of  his  parents. 
 They  had  five  fans,  and  four  daughters.  Their  eldeft  fon  is 
 Hezckiah  Brainerd,  Efq;  a  julUce  of  the  peace,  and  for 
 feveral' years  paft  a  repre Tentative  of  the  town  of  Haddam,  in 
 the  general  afiembly  or  Connetflicut  colony ;  the  fecond 
 was  the  Reverend  Mr  Nehemiah  Brainerd,  a  worthy  rainifler 
 at  Ealtbury  in  Connecticut,  Vv^ho  died  of  a  confumption  Nov. 
 lo.  1742.;  the  fourth  is  Mr  John  Brainerd,  who  fucceeds 
 his  brother  David,  r.s  miiTi jnary  to  the  Indians,  and  paftor  of 
 the  fame  church  of  Ciiriilian  Indians  in  Nevz-Jerfey  ;  and  the 
 fifth  \yas  Ifraei,  lately  fludent  at  Yale-college  in  New-Haven, 
 and  died  Cincc  his  brother  David.— Mrs  Dorothy  Brainerd 
 having  lived  feveral  years  a  widovv,  died,  v/hen  her  fon, 
 whofe  life  I  am  about  to  give  an  account  of,  was  about 
 fourteen  years  of  age  :  fo  that  in  his  youth  he  was  left  both 
 fatherlefs  and  niothcrlefs.  What  account  he  has  given  of 
 himfelf,  and  his  ov/n  life,  may  be  fee n  in  what   foliov.'s.] 
 
 T  AVas,  I  think,  f^-om  my  youth,  fomcthing  fober,  and  in- 
 A.  cline.l  rather  to  melancholy,  than  the  contrary  extreme  ; 
 but  do  not  rememlier  anything  of  conviction  of  fm,  worthy  of 
 remark,  till  I  was,  I  believe,  about  feven'or  eight  years  of 
 age;  when  I  became  fjmetbing  concerned  for  my  foul,  and 
 tc^rrified  at  the  thoughts  of  death,  and  was  driven  to  the  per- 
 formance of  duties:  lu:  it  appeared  a  melancholy  bufmefs^ 
 an.1  deflroyed  my  cagcrncfs  for  play.  And,  alas!  this  re- 
 li;jious   concern  v/as  but  fliort  lived.     IloV'Cvcr,  I  fometimes 
 
 attended 
 
Mt.  J.-19.       Mr     DAVID     BRAINERD.         3 
 
 attended  fecret  prayer  ;  and  thus  lived  at  "  eafe  in  Zion, 
 "  without  God  in  the  world,"  and  without  much  concern,  as  I 
 remember,  till  I  was  above  thirteen  yeais  of  age.  Cut  P)me- 
 time  in  the  winter  1732,  I  was  Ibmetliing  roufed  out  of 
 •carn-il  fecurity,  by  I  Icarce  know  what  means  at  fiiil ;  but 
 v/as  much  excited  by  the  prevailing  of  a  moital  fickneis  in 
 Haddam.  I  was  frequent,  conflant,  and  fomething  fervent  in 
 duties,  and  took  delight  in  reading,  efpecially  Mr  Jancway's 
 Token  for  children;  I  felt  fometimes  much  melted  in  duties, 
 and  took  great  delight  in  the  performance  of  them. ;  and  I 
 fometimes  hoped,  that  I  was  converted,  or  at  lead  in  a  good 
 and  hopeful  way  for  heaven  and  happinefs,  not  knowing  \.hr-t 
 converfion  was.  7'he  Spirit  of  God  at  this  time  proceeded 
 far  with  me ;  I  was  remarkably  dead  to  the  Vi'orld,  and  my 
 thoughts  were  almoll  wholly  employed  about  my  foul's  con- 
 cerns ;  and  I  may  indeed  fay,  "  Almoil  I  was  perfuaded  to  be 
 "  a  Chriftian.'*  I  v/as  alfo  exceedingly  diftrelfed  and  melan- 
 choly at  the  death  of  my  mother,  in  March  1732.  But 
 afterwards  my  religious  concern  began  to  decline,  and  I  by 
 degrees  fell  back  into  a  conliderable  degree  of  fecurity, 
 though  I  ftill  attended  fecret  prayer  frequently. 
 
 About  the  15th  of  April  1733,  ^  removed  from  my  fa- 
 ther's houfe  to  Eaft-Haddam,  where  I  fpent  four  years,  but 
 Hill  "without  God  in  the  w^orld  ;"  though,  for  the  nioft  part, 
 I  went  a  round  of  fecret  duty.  I  was  not  exceedingly  ad- 
 ciifted  to  young  company,  or  frolicking  (as  it  is  called).  Eut 
 this  I  know,  that  when  I  did  go  into  company,  I  never  re- 
 turned from  a  frolick  in  my  life,  with  fo  good  a  confcience 
 as  I  went  v/ith  ;  it  always  added  new  guilt  to  me,  and  made 
 me  afraid  to  come  to  the  throne  of  grace,  and  fpoiled  thofe 
 good  frames  I  was  v/ont  fometimes  to  pleafe  myfclf  with. 
 But,  alas!  all  my  goo^  fiames  were  but  felf-iighteoufnef?, 
 not  bottomed  on  a  defire  for  the  glory  of  God.  •     j 
 
 About  the  latter  end  of  April  1737,  being  full  nin.^en 
 years  of  age,  I  removed  to  Durham,  CA-id  began  to  work  en 
 rny  farm,  and  fo  continued  the  3ear  out,  or  near,  till  I  was 
 twenty  years  old  ;  frequently  longing,  from  a  natural  in- 
 clination, after  a  liberal  education.  When  I  was  about 
 twenty  years  of  age,  1  applied  myfelf  to  fiudy  ;  and  fome- 
 time  before,  w^as  misre  than  ordinarily  excited  to  and  in  duty : 
 but  now  engaged  more  t'^an  ever  in  the  duties  of  rell'/ion.  I 
 became  very  fuifJ:,  and  v/atchful  over  my  thoughts,  words, 
 rind  a«51:ions;  and  thought  J  nvcA  be  fober  indeed,  becaufe 
 I  def gned  to  devote  nivfelf  to  the  minlflry  ;  and  imagined 
 I  did  dedicate  myfclf  to 'the  Lord. 
 
 A  2  Some 
 
4  THELIFEOr  J.  D.  1731. 
 
 Some  time  in  April  1738,  I  went  to  Mr  Fifke's,  and  lived 
 ■with  him  during  his  life  *.  And  I  remember,  he  advifed 
 me  wholly  to  abandon  young  company,  and  aflbciate  myfclf 
 with  grave  elderly  people  :  which  counfel  I  followed ;  and 
 my  manner  of  life  was  now  exceeding  regular,  and  full  of 
 religion,  fuch  as  it  wis  ;  for  I  read  my  Bible  more  than  twice 
 through  in  Icfs  than  a  year,  I  fpent  much  time  every  day  in 
 fecret  jprayer,  and  other  fecret  duties ;  I  gave  great  attention 
 to  the  word  preached,  and  endeavoured  to  my  utmoft  to  re- 
 tain it.  So  much  concerned  was  I  about  religion,  that  I  a- 
 greed  with  feme  young  perfons  to  meet  privately  on  Sab- 
 bath-evenings for  religious  exercifes,  and  thought  myfelf 
 lincere  in  thefe  duties  ;  and  after  our  meeting  was  ended,  I 
 ufed  to  repeat  the  difcaurfes  of  the  day  to  myfelf,  and  recol- 
 le6l  what  I  could,  though  fometimes  it  was  very  late  in  the 
 night.  Again,  on  Monday-mornings  I  ufed  fometimes  to 
 recoUeft  the  fame  fermons.  And  I  l)ad  fometimes  confider- 
 able  movings  of  atfeciions  in  duties,  and  much  pleafure, 
 and  had  many  thoughts  of  joining  to  the  church.  In  Ihort, 
 I  had  a  very  good  outfide,  and  refted  entirely  on  my  duties, 
 though  I  was  not  feniible  of  it. 
 
 After  Mr  Filke's  death,  I  proceeded  in  my  learning  with 
 my  brother  ;  and  was  ftill  very  conftant  in  religious  duties. 
 End  often  wondered  at  the  levity  of  profefTors  ;  it  was  a 
 trouble  to  me,  that  they  were  focarelefsin  religious  matters.-^- 
 Thus  I  proceeded  a  coniiderable  length  on  -d  felf-rifhteous 
 foundation  ;  and'  lliould  have  been  entirely  loft  and  undone, 
 had  not  the  mere  mercy  of  God  prevented. 
 
 Some  time  in  the  beginning  of  winter,  anno  1738,  itpleafed 
 God,  on  one  Sabbath-day  morning,  as  I  was  walking  out 
 for  feme  fecret  duties,  (as  1  remember),  to  give  me  on  a  ludden 
 fuch  a  fenie  of  my  danger,  and  the  wrath  ot  God,  that  I  ftoocJ 
 arv.zed,  and  my  former  good  frames,  that  I  had  pleaicd  my- 
 felf with,  all  prelently  vanifLed  ;  and  from  the  view  that  I 
 had  of  my  fm  and  viienefs,  I  was  much  diftrefled  all  that  day, 
 fearing  the  vengeance  of  God  would  foon  overtake  me ;  I 
 was  nu'.ch  dejefted,  and  kept  m.uch  alone,  and  fometimes 
 begruiched  the  birds  and  beafls  their  happinefs,  becavfe  they 
 were  not  expcfed  to  eternal  m.ifery,  as  I  evidently  law  I  v.as. 
 x4.nd  thus  I  lived  from  day  to  day,  being  frequently  in  great 
 diftrefs:  fometin>es  there  appeared  m.ountains  be k re  me  to 
 oh ftru 61  my  hope?  of  mercy  ;  and  the  work  of  convcrfion  ap- 
 peared fo  great,  I  thought  I  ihould  never  be  the  fubject  of  it: 
 
 f  Mr  Fiflce  was  the  pallor  of  the  church  ic  Kaddam. 
 
JEt.^i.       Mr    DAVID     BRAINERD.  5 
 
 but  ufed,  however,  to  pray  and  cry  to  God,  and  perform  other 
 duties  with  gi  eat  earnellnefs,  and  hoped  by  fome  means  to  make 
 the  cafe  better.  And  though  I  hundreds  of  times  renounced 
 all  pretences  of  any  "worth  in  my  duties,  (as  I  thought),  even 
 in  the  feafon  of  the  performance  of  them,  and  often  confefled 
 to  God  that  1  deferved  nothing  for  the  very  bcft  of  them, 
 but  eternal  condemnation ;  yet  ftill  I  had  a  (ecret  latent  hope 
 of  recommending  myfelfto  God  by  my  religious  duties  ;  and 
 when  I  prayed  affeclionately,  and  m.y  heart  Teemed  in  fomc 
 meafure  to  melt,  I  hoped  God  would  be  thereby  moved  to 
 pity  me,  my  prayers  then  looked  with  fome  appearance  of 
 goodticfs  in  them,  and  1  feemed  to  mourn  for  fm :  and  then  I 
 could  in  fome  meafure  venture  on  the  mercy  of  God  in 
 Chrift,  (as  I  thought),  chough  the  preponderating  thought  and 
 foundation  of  my  hope  was  fome  imagination  oigoodnefs  in 
 my  neart^meltings,  and  flowing  of  affections  in  duty,  and 
 ^fometimes)  extraordinary  enlargements  therein,  ^c.  Though 
 at  fome  times  the  gate  appeared  fo  very  ftrait,  that  it  looked 
 next  to  impoflible  to  enter,  yet  at  other  tim.es  I  flattered  my- 
 felf  that  it  was  not  fo.very  difficult,  and  hoped  I  fliould  by 
 diligence  and  watchfulnefs  foon  gain  the  point.  Sometimes 
 after  enlargement  in  duty  and  ccnliderable  affe£lion,  I  hoped 
 1  had  made  a  good  ftep  toward:>  heaven,  and  imagined  that 
 G;)d  was  affecled  as  I  was,  and  that  he  would  hear  fuch 
 Jincere  cries,  (as  I  called  them) :  and  fo  fometimes  when  I 
 withdrew  for  fecret  duties  in  great  diflrefs,  I  returned  forae- 
 thing  comfortable;  and  thus  healed  myfelf  with  my  duties. 
 
 Some  time  in  February  1738-9,  I  fet  apart  a  day  for  fecret 
 fafting  and  prayer,  and  fpent  the  day  in  almofl:  ijicefl^ant  cries 
 to  God  for  mercy,  that  he  would  open  my  eyes  to  fee  the 
 evil  of  fin,  and  the  way  of  life  by  jefus  Chrifl.  And  God 
 was  pleafed  that  day  to  make  confiderable  difcovcries  of  my 
 heart  to  me.  But  ftill  I  truJJed'm  all  the  duties  I  performed; 
 though  there  was  no  manner  oi goodnefs  in  the  duties  I  thea 
 performed,  there  being  no  manner  of  refpect  to  the  gioiy  of 
 God  in  them,  nor  cny  fuch  principle  in  my  heart;  yet  God 
 was  plrafcd  to  make  my  endeavours  that  day,  a  means  t® 
 ihcw  me  my  helplejjnefs  in  fome  meafure. 
 
 Sometimes  I  w-as  greatly  encouraged,  and  imagined  that 
 God  loved  me,  and  was  pleafed  with  rne,  and  thought  I  fhould 
 fcon  be  fully  reconciled  to  God  ;  while  the  v.holc  was  found- 
 ed on  m.cre  prefumpiicn,  arifing  from  enlargement  in  duty, 
 or  flowing  ofaffedlions,  or  fome  good  i-efolutions,  and  the 
 like.  And  when,  at  times,  great  dil^refs  began  to  arife, 
 *'r,  a  flgh:  cf  my  vilcnc-fs  and  uckcdnef^,  and  inability  to  de- 
 liver 
 
6  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  A.D,  1739. 
 
 liver  m5'felf  from  a  fovereign  God,  I  ufed  to  put  off  the  dif^ 
 covery,  as  what  I  could  not  bear.  Once,  I  remember,  a 
 terrible  pang  of  diflrefs  feized  me,  and  the  thoughts  of  re- 
 nouncing myfelf,  and  ftanding  naked  before  God,  llripped  of 
 all  goodnefs,  were  fo  dreadful  to  me,  tl.at  I  was  ready  to 
 fay  to  them  as  Felix  to  Paul,  "  Go  thy  way  for  this  time.'' 
 Thus,  though  I  daily  longed  for  greater  conviftion  of  l:n, 
 fuppofing  that  I  muft  fee  more  of  my  dreadful  ftate  in  order 
 to  a  remedy  ;  yet  when  the  difcoveries  of  my  vile  hellifh 
 heart  were  made  to  me,  the  fight  was  lb  dreadful,  and  fhew- 
 ed  me  fo  plainly  my  expofednefs  to  damnation,  that  I  could 
 
 not  endure  it. 1  conflantly  ftrove  after  whatever  qualif- 
 
 cations  I  imagined  others  obtained  before  the  reception  of 
 Chrift,  in  order  to  recommeyid  me  to  his  favour.  Sometimes 
 I  felt  ihe  power  of  an  hard  hearty  and  iuppofed  it  muft  be 
 foftemd  before  Chrift  would  accept  of  me ;  and  when  I  felt 
 any  meltings  of  heart,  I  hoped  now  the  work  was  almoft 
 done:  and  hence,  when  my  diftrefs  ftill  remained,  I  was  wont 
 to  ;^iurmur  at  God's  dealings  with  me ;  and  thought,  when 
 others  felt  their  hearts  foftened,  God  Ihewed  them  mercy  ; 
 but  my  diftrefs  remained  ftill. 
 
 Sometimes  I  grew  remijs  zrA  Jluggijh,  without  any  great 
 conviftions  of  fin,  for  a  confiderable  time  together ;  but 
 after  fuch  a  feafon,  convictions  fometimes  feized  me  more 
 violently.  One  night  I  remember  in  particular,  when  1  was 
 walking  folitarily  abroad,  I  had  opened  to  me  fuch  a  view  of 
 my  fin,  that  I  feared  the  ground  would  cleave  afunder  under 
 ray  feet,  and  become  my  grave,  and  fend  my  foul  quick  into 
 hell,  before  I  could  get  home.  And  though  I  was  forced  to 
 go  to  bed,  left  my  diftrefs  fhould  be  difcovered  by  others, 
 N/hich  I  much  feared;  yet  I  fcarce  durft  lleep  at  all,  for  I 
 thought  it  would  be  a  great  wonder  if  I  fiiculd  be  out  of  hell 
 ja  the  morning.  And  though  my  diftrefs  was  fometimes  thus 
 great,  yet  I  greatly  dreaded  the  lofs  of  conviflions,  and  re- 
 turning back  to  a  ftate  of  carnal  Iccuritj-,  and  to  my  former 
 iafenfibility  of  impending  wrath;  which  made  me  exceeding 
 cxadt  in  my  behaviour,  left  I  ftiould  ftifle  the  motions  of 
 God's  Spirit.  When  at  any  time  I  took  a  view  of  my  con- 
 ^'i^5t:icnsof  my  own  finfulnels,  and  thought  the  degree  ot  them 
 to  be  confiderable,  I  was  wont  to  truft  in  my  convictions: 
 but  this  confidence,  and  the  hopes  that  arofe  in  me  from  it, 
 of  foon  making  fome  notable  advances  towards  deliverance, 
 would  cafe  my  mind,  and  1  foon  became  miore  lenfelcfs  and 
 remiifs:  but  then  again,  when  ]  difcerned  my  conviClions  to 
 grow  ir.nguid,  and  I  thcrght   them  about  to  kave  me,  this 
 
 immediately 
 
'JEt.21.       Mr    DAVID     BRAINERD.  ? 
 
 immediately  alarmed  and  diflrefTed  mc.  Sometimes  I  cxpedV- 
 ed  to  take  a  large  flep,  and  get  very  far  towards  conver- 
 fioa,  by  fome  particular  opportunity  or  means  I  had  in 
 view. 
 
 The  many  difappointments,  and  great  diftrefles  and  per- 
 plexity I  met  with,  put  me  into  a  moft  horrible  frame  of 
 c^jntejllm  with  the  Almighty ;  with  an  inward  vehemence 
 and  virulence,  finding  fault  with  his  v/ays  of  dealing  with 
 mankind.  J  found  great  fault  with  the  imputation  of  Adam's 
 fin  to  his  pofteiity  :  and  my  wicked  heart  often  wiflied  for 
 fome  other  way  of  falvation,  than  by  Jefus  Chrift.  And  be- 
 ing like  the  troubled  fea,  and  my  thoughts  confufed,  I  ufed 
 to  contrive  to  efcape  the  wrath  of  God  by  fome  other  means^, 
 and  had  ftrange  projeclions,  full  of  Atheifm,  contiiving  to 
 difappoiot  God's  defigns  and  decrees  concerning  me,  or  to 
 efcape  Gou's  notice,  and  hide  my'elf  from  him.  But  when, 
 upon  reflection,  I  faw  thefe  projections  were  vain,  and  would 
 not  ferve  me,  and  that  I  could  contrive  nothing  for  my  own 
 relief,  this  would  throw  my  mind  into  the  moft  horrid  frame,, 
 to  wifh  there  was  no  God,  or  to  wifh  there  were  fome  other 
 God  that  could  controul  him,  6c.  Thefe  thoughts  and  de-' 
 fires  were  the  fecret  inclinations  of  my  heart,  that  were  fre- 
 quently acting  before  I  was  aware;  but,  alas!  they  were  mine, 
 although  I  was  alfrighted  with  them,  when  I  came  to  reflefir 
 on  them:  when  1  confidered  of  it,  it  diflrefTed  me,  to  think, 
 that  my  heart  wa,s  {o  full  of  enmity  againfl:  God ;  and  it  made 
 me  tremble,  left  God's  vengeance  fhould  fuddenly  fall  upon 
 me.  I  I-'  fed  before,  to  imagine  my  heart  was  not  {o  bad,  as 
 the  fcriptures  and  fome  other  books  reprefentcd.  Sometimes 
 I  ufed  to  take  much  painb  to  work  it  up  into  a  good  frame, 
 a  humble  fubmiiTive  dilpoution;  and  hoped  there  was  then 
 Jbme  goodnefs  in  me:  but  it  may  be  on  a  fudden,  the  thoughts 
 of  the  flriclnefs  of' the  law,  or  the  I'overeignty  of  God, 
 would  fo  irritate  the  corruption  of  my  heart,  that  I  had  fo 
 ■watched  over,  and  hoped  I  had  brought  to  a  good  frame, 
 that  it  would  break  over  all  bounds,  and  burft  forth  on  all  fides, 
 like  floods  of  waters  when  they  break  down  their  damm. 
 But  being  fenfible  of  the  necefiity  of  a  deep  humiliation  in 
 order  to  a  faving  clofe  with  Chrilt,  I  ufed  to  fet  myfelf  to 
 work  in  my  own  heart  thofe  conviclions  that  were  requilkc 
 in  fuch  an  humiliation;  as,  a  conviction,  that  God  would  he 
 juft,  if  he  caft  me  off  for  ever;  and  that  if  ever  God  ihould 
 befiovv'  mercy  on  rac,  it  would  be  mere  grace,  though  I 
 fhould  be  in  diflrefs  many  years  firft,  and  be  never  lb  much 
 engaged  in  duty;  that  God  was  not'  in   :he  leaft  cbli£cd  tu 
 
f  THELllfEOP  A.D.  1739; 
 
 pity  me  the  more  for  all  part  duties,  cries,  and  tears,  6c. 
 Thefe  things  I  ftrove  to  my  utmoll  to  bring  myfelf  to  a  fi'-rti 
 belief  of,  and  hearty  aflent  to ;  and  hoped  that  now  i  was 
 brought  off  from  myfelf,  and  truly  humbled  and  bowed  to  tnc 
 divine  fovcreignty;  and  was  wont  to  tell  God  in  my  prayers, 
 that  now  I  had  thofe  very  difpofitionsof  foul  that  he  required, 
 and  on  which  he  fhewed  mercy  to  others,  and  thereupon  to  beg 
 and  plead  for  mercy  to  me.  But  woen  I  found  no  relief,  md 
 was  ftill  oppreffed  with  guilt,  and  feirs  of  wrath,  my  lou!  was 
 in  a  tumult,  and  my  heart  rofe  againft  God,  a-,  deaimg  hard- 
 ly with  me.  Yet  then  my  confclenco  flew  in  ray  face,  putting  me 
 in  mind  of  my  late  confeffion  to  God  of  his  iuftice  m  my 
 conJemnation,  circ.  And  this  giving  rae  a  fight  of  the  bad- 
 nefs  of  my  heart,  threw  me  again  into  diftrefs,  and  I  wifticd 
 I  had  watched  my  heart  more  narrowly,  to  k^Lp  it  from 
 breaking  out  againft  God's  dealings  with  me,  and  I  even  xvifti- 
 «d  I  had  not  pleaded  for  mercy  on  account  of  my  humi- 
 liation, becaufe  thereby  I  had  loft  all  my  feeming  good- 
 nefs. 
 
 Thus,  fcores  of  times,  I  vainly  imagined  myfelf  humbled 
 and  prepared  for  faving  mercy. 
 
 While  I  was  in  this  diftrefled,  bewildered,  and  tumultuous 
 ftate  of  mind,  the  corruption  of  my  heart  was  efpecially  irri' 
 fated  with  thefe  things  following. 
 
 I.  Tht  firi^nefs  of  the  divine  law.  For  I  found  it  was 
 impollible  for  me  (after  my  utmoft  pains)  to  anfwer  the  de- 
 mands of  it.  I  often  made  new  refolutions,  and  as  often 
 broke  them.  I  imputed  the  whole  to  carelefthefs,  and  the 
 want  of  being  more  watchful,  and  ufed  to  call  myfelf  a  fooi 
 for  my  negligence.  But  when,  upon  a  ftronger  refolution, 
 and  greater  endeavours,  and  clofe  application  of  myfelf  to 
 fafting  and  prayer,  I  found  all  attempts  fail,  then  I  quarrel- 
 led with  the  law  of  God,  as  unreafonably  rigid.  I  thought, 
 if  it  extended  only  to  my  outward  actions  and  behaviours,  I 
 oould  bear  with  it ;  but  I  found  it  condemned  me  for  my  evil 
 thoughts,  and  fms  of  my  heart,  which  1  could  not  poifibly 
 prevent.  I  T^-as  extremely  loth  to  give  out,  and  ovv^n  my 
 utter  helpleifnefs  in  this  matter:  but  after  repeated  difap- 
 pointments,  thought  that,  rather  than  perilli,  I  could  do  a 
 little  more  ftiil,  efpecially  if  fuch  and  fuch  circumftance3 
 might  but  attend  my  endeavours  and  ftrivings  ;  I  hoped,  that 
 I  ihould  ftrlve  m.ore  earneftly  than  ever,  if  the  matter  came 
 to  extremity,  (though  I  never  could  find  the  time  to  do  my  ut- 
 moft, in  the  manner  I  intended):  and  this  hope  of  future 
 more    favourable   circumftanccs,    and   of  doing    fomething 
 
 great 
 
Mt.^^'         Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  9 
 
 great  hereafter,  kept  me  from  utter  defpair  in  myfelfj  ancj 
 from  feeing  myfeif  fallen  into  the  hands  of  a  fovereign  God, 
 and  dependent  on  nothing  but  free  and  boundlefs  grace. 
 
 2.  Another  thing  was,  ih^.!  faith  alone  was  the  conditlrm  of 
 falvation;  and  that   God  would   not  come   down  to    lower 
 
 terms,  that  he  would  not  promife  life  and  falvation  upon  my 
 fincere  and  hearty  prayers  and  endeavours.  That  word, 
 Mark  xvi.  16.  "  He  that  believeth  not,  ihall  be  damned,"  cut 
 off  all  hope  there :  and  I  found,  faith  was  the  fovereign  gift 
 of  God;  that  I  could  not  get  it  as  of  myfeif,  and  could  not 
 oblige  God  to  beftow  it  upon  me,  by  any  of  my  performances, 
 (Eph.  ii.  I.  8.)  "  This,"  I  was  ready  to  fay,  "  is  a  hard  fay- 
 "  ing,  who  can  hear  it?"  I  could  not  bear,  that  all  I  had 
 done  fliould  fland  for  mere  nothing,  who  had  been  very  con-. 
 fcientious  in  duty,  and  had  been  exceeding  religious  a  great 
 while,  and  had  (as  I  thought)  done  much  more  than  many 
 others  that  had  obtained  mercy.  I  confefTed  indeed  the  viic- 
 nefs  of  my  duties;  but  then,  what  made  them  at  that  tim.e 
 feem  vile,  was  ray  wandering  thoughts  in  them;  net  becaufe 
 I  was  all  over  defiled  like  a  devil,  and  the  principle  corrupt 
 from  whence  they  flowed,  (o  that  I  could  not  polTlbly  do  any 
 thing  that  was  good.  And  therefore  I  called  what  I  did,  by 
 the  name  of  honeft  faithful  endeavours;  and  could  not  bear  it, 
 that  God  had  made  no  promifes  of  falvation  to  them. 
 
 3.  Another  thing  v/as,  that  I  could  not  find  out  ivhat  faith 
 was ;  or  ivhat  it  was  to  believe,  and  come  to  Chrift.  1  read 
 the  calls  of  Chrifl,  made  to  the  weary  and  heavy  laden;  but 
 could  find  no  way  that  he  directed  them  to  come  in.  I 
 thought,  I  would  gladly  come,  if  I  knew  h'jw,  though  the 
 path  of  duty  dire<Sled  to  were  never  fo  difficult.  I  read  7vlr 
 Stoddard's  Guide  to  Chr'-fl,  (which  I  truft  was,  in  the  hand  of 
 God,  the  happy  means  of  my  converfion),  and  my  heart  roic: 
 againfl:  the  author;  for  though  he  told  me  my  very  heart  all 
 along  under  conviclions,  and  feemed  to  be  very  beneficial  to 
 me  in  his  directions ;  yet  here  he  failed,  he  did  not  tcU  mn 
 any  thing  I  could  do,  that  would  bring  me  to  Chrifl,  but  lerc 
 me  as  it  were  with  a  great  gulph  between  me  and  Chrift,  with- 
 out any  direiSlion  to  get  through.  For  I  v/as  not  yet  effec- 
 tually and  experimentally  taught,  that  there  could  be  no  way 
 prefcribed,  whereby  a  natural  man  cov.Id,  of  his  own  ftrength, 
 obtain  that  which  is  fupernaturai,  and  which  the  highed  angel 
 cannot  give. 
 
 4.  Another  thing  that  I  found  a  groat  inward  oppofi- 
 tion  to,  v/as  xhz  fjvere'ignty  of  God.  1  could  not  bear,  that 
 it  rhould  be  wholly  at  God's  pleafure,  10    fave  or  damn  me. 
 
to  THELirEOF  J.  D.  1739. 
 
 juft  as  he  would.  Tint  paflage,  Rom.  ix.  11. — 23.  was  a 
 conftant  vexation  to  me,  efpecially  verf.  21.  The  reading  or 
 meditating  on  this  always  deftroyed  my  feeming  good  frames  : 
 \vhen  I  thought  I  was  almoft  humbled,  and  almoft  refigned 
 to  God's  fovereignty,  the  reading  or  thinking  on  this  pafTage 
 would  make  my  enmity  againft  the  fovereignty  of  God  ap- 
 pear. And  Vi^hen  I  cam.e  to  refleft  on  my  inward  enmity  and 
 blafphemy,  that  arofe  on  this  occafion,  I  was  the  more  afraid 
 of  God,  and  driven  further  from  any  hopes  of  reconciliation 
 with  him;  and  it  gave  me  fuch  a  dreadful  view  of  myfelf, 
 that  I  dreaded  more  than  ever  to  fee  rayfelf  in  God's  hands, 
 and  at  his  fovereign  difpofal,  and  it  made  me  more  oppofite 
 than  ever  to  fubmit  to  his  fovereignty  ;  for  I  thought  God 
 defigned  my  damnation.— 
 
 All  this  time  the  Spirit  of  God  was  powerfully  at  work 
 with  me;  and  I  Vv'as  inwardly  prefTed  to  relinquifh  all  felf- 
 confldence,  all  hopes  of  ever  helping  myfelf  by  any  means  what- 
 foever :  and  the  conviction  of  my  kji  eftate  was  fometimes  fo 
 clear  and  manifeft  before  my  eyes,  that  it  was  as  if  it  had  been 
 declared  to  me  in  fo  many  words,  "  It  is  done,  it  is  done,  it 
 *'  is  for  ever  impoffible  to  deliver  yourfelf."  For  about  three 
 or  four  days,  my  foul  was  thus  diftreffed,  efpecially  at  fome 
 turns,  when  for  a  few  moments  I  feemed  to  myfelf  loft  and 
 undone  ;  but  then  would  Ihrink  back  immediately  from  the 
 fight,  becaufe  T  dared  not  venture  myfelf  into  the  hands  of 
 God;  as  wholly  hclplefs,  and  at  the  difpofal  of  his  fovereign 
 pleafare.  I  dared  not  fee  that  important  truth  concerning 
 xriyfelf,  that  I  was  dead  in  trefpafjes  and  fins.  But  when  I 
 had  as  it  were  thruft  away  thefe  views  of  myfelf  at  any  time, 
 I  felt  diftrefled  to  have  the  fame  difcoveries  of  myfelf  again  ; 
 for  I  greatly  feared  being  given  over  of  God  to  final  ftupidity. 
 When  I  thought  of  putting  it  off  to  a  more  convenient  feajony 
 the  convi£l"ion  was  fo  clofe  and  powerful  with  regard  to  the 
 prefent  time,  that  it  was  the  beft  time,  and  probably  the  only 
 time,  that  I  dared  not  put  it  off.  It  was  the  fight  of  truths 
 concerning  myfelf,  trtdh  refpcffling  my  ftate,  as  a  creature 
 fallen  and  alienated  from  God,  and  that  confequently  could 
 make  no  demands  on  God  for  mercy,  but  muft  fubfcribe  to 
 the  abfolute  fovereignty  of  the  divine  Being ;  the  fight  of 
 the  truth,  I  fay,  my  foul  rtirank  away  from,  and  trembled 
 to  thiflk  of  beholding.  Thus,  "  He  that  doth  evil,"  as  all 
 unregenerate  men  continually  do,  "  hates  the  light  of  truth,"^ 
 neither  cares  to  cmie  to  it,  becaufe  it  will  reprove  his  deeds,- 
 atjd  fb.ew  him  his  jufl:  deferts,  John  ill.  20.  And  thoi.igh  fome' 
 time  before,  I  had  taken  much  pains  (as  I  thought)  to   lub- 
 
 p  mit.. 
 
JEt.22.         Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  i^ 
 
 mit  to  the  fovereignty  of  God,  yet  I  miftook  the  thhig ;  and 
 did  not  once  imagine,  that  feeing  and  being  made  experi- 
 mentally fenfible  of  this  truth,  which  my  foul  now  fo  much 
 dreaded  and  trembled  at  a  fenfe  of,  was  the  frame  of  foul  that 
 I  had  been  fo  earneft:  in  purfuit  of  heretofore  :  for  I  had  ever 
 hoped,  that  when  I  had  attained  to  that  hianiliaiion,  which  I 
 fuppoled  neceffary  to  go  before  faith,  then  it  would  not  be 
 fair  for  God  to  caj}  me  off;  but  now  I  law  it  was  fo  far  from 
 any  goodnefs  in  me,  to  own  myfelf  fpiritually  dead,  and  de- 
 ftitute  of  all  goodnefs,  that,  on  the  contrary,  my  mouth 
 would  be  for  t\er  fioppedhy  it;  and  it  looked  as  dreadful  to 
 me,  to  fee  myfelf,  and  the  relation  I  flood  in  to  God,  as  a 
 jinner  and  I  criminal,  and  he  a  great  Judge  and  Sovereign,  as' 
 it  would  be  to  a  poor  trembling  creature,  to  venture  off  fome 
 high  precipice.  And  hence  I  put  it  off  for  a  minute  or  two, 
 and  tried  for  better  circumftances  to  do  it  in  ;  either  I  mufl 
 read  a  paffage  or  two,  or  pray  firfl,  or  fornething  of  the 
 like  nature  ;  or  elfe  put  off  my  lubmiffion  to  God's  fove- 
 reignty, with  an  objeftion,  that  I  did  not  know  how  to  fub- 
 mit.  But  the  truth  was,  I  could  fee  no  fafcty  in  owning  my- 
 felf in  the  hands  of  a  fovereign  God,  and  that  I  could  lay  no 
 .claim  to  any  thing  better  than  damnation. 
 
 But  after  a  conflderable  time  fpent  in  fuch  like  exercifes 
 and  diftrcffes,  one  morning,  while  I  was  walking  in  a  foli- 
 tary  place,  as  ufual,  I  at  once  faw  that  all  my  contrivances  and 
 projections  to  effeCi  or  procure  deliverance  and  falvation  for 
 myfelf,  were  utterly  in  vain  ;  I  was  brought  quite  to  a  (land 
 as  finding  myfelf  totally  lofi.  I  had  thought  many  times 
 before,  that  the  difficulties  in  my  way  were  very  great ;  but 
 now  I  faw,  in  another  and  very  different  light,  that  it  was 
 for  ever  impoffible  for  me  to  do  any  thing  towards  helping 
 or  delivering  myfelf.  I  then  thought  of  blaming  myfelf, 
 that  I  had  not  done  more,  and  been  more  engaged,  while  I 
 had  opportunity ;  (for  it  feemed  now  as  if  the  feafon  of  do- 
 ing was  for  ever  over  and  gone) :  but  I  inflantly  faw,  that 
 let  me  have  done  "what  I  would,  it  would  no  more  have 
 tended  to  my  helping  myfelf,  than  v/hat  I  had  done;  that  I 
 had  made  all  the  pleas  I  ever  could  have  made  to  all  eterni- 
 ty ;  and  that  all  my  pleas  were  vain.  The  tumult  that  had 
 been  before  in  my  mind,  was  now  quieted ;  and  I  was  iome- 
 thing  eafed  of  that  diiirefs,  which  I  felt,  while  flruggling  a- 
 gainft  a  fight  of  myfelf,  and  of  the  divine  fovereignty.  1  had 
 the  grcatefl  certainty,  that  my  ffate  was  for  ever  miferable, 
 for  all  that  I  could  do ;  and  wondered,  and  was  almoft  aflo- 
 jnfhcd;  that  I.  had  never  been  fenfible  of  it  before. 
 
 B  2  In 
 
12  T  H  E     L  I  r  E     O  r  A.D.  1739. 
 
 In  the  time  -while  I  remained  in  this  flate,  my  notions  re- 
 fpefting  my  duties,  were  quite  different  from  what  I  had  ever 
 cntertamcd  in  times  pall.  Before  this,  the  more  1  did  in  duty, 
 tlic  more  I  thought  God  was  obliged  to  me ;  or  at  leaft  the 
 more  hard  I  thought  it  would  be  for  God  to  cart  me  off; 
 though  at  the  fame  time  I  confeffed,  and  thought  I  faw, 
 that  there  was  no  goodnefs  or  merit  in  my  duties :  but  now 
 the  more  I  did  in  prayer  or  any  other  duty,  the  more  I  faw  I 
 was  indebted  to  God  for  allowing  me  to  afk  for  mercy  ;  for 
 I  faw,  it  was  felf-intercft  had  led  me  to  pray,  and  that  I  had 
 never  once  prayed  from  any  refpe^t  to  the  glory  of  God. 
 Kow  1  law,  there  was  no  necellaiy  connexion  between  my 
 prayers  and  the  beftov/ment  of  divine  mercy ;  that  they  laid 
 not  the  leaft  obligation  upon  God  to  beftow  his  grace  upon 
 me  ;  and  that  there  was  no  more  virtue  or  goodnefs  in  them, 
 than  there  would  be  in  my  paddling  with  my  hand  in  the 
 water,  (which  was  the  comparifon  I  had  then  in  my  mind); 
 and  this  becaufe  they  were  not  perform.ed  from  any  lore  or 
 regard  to  God.  ]  law,  that  I  had  been  heaping  up  my  devo- 
 tions before  God,  hilling,  praying,  oc.  pretending,  and  in- 
 «ieed  really  thhiking,  at  lome  times,  that  I  was  aiming  at  the 
 glory  of  God  ;  whereas  I  never  once  truly  intended  it,  but  only 
 my  own  happinefs.  I  faw,  that  as  I  had  never  done  any 
 Thing  for  God,  I  had  no  claim  to  lay  to  any  thing  from  him, 
 hut  perdition,  on  ac*  unt  of  my  bypocrify  and  mockery.  Oh 
 how  different  did  my  duties  now  appear  fi  om  what  they  ufed 
 to  do!  I  ufed  to  charge  them  with  lin  and  imperfeiftion ; 
 but  this  was  only  on  account  of  the  wanderings  and  vain 
 thoughts  attending  them,  and  not  becaufe  I  had  no  regard  to 
 God  in  them;  for  this  I  thought  I  had:  but  when  I  faw  evi- 
 dently that  1  had  regard  to  nothing  but  felf-intereft^,  then  they 
 appeared  vile  mockery  of  God,  felf-worlhip,  and  a  continual 
 rourfe  of  lies  ;  {o  that  I  faw  now,  there  was  fomething  worfe 
 had  att-jr  led  my  duties,  than  barely  a  few  wanderings,  i^c. ; 
 for  the  wi-iole  v.ai nothing  but  felf-worfhip,  and  an  horrid  abufc 
 of  God. 
 
 I  continued,  as  I  remember,  in  this  flate  of  mind,  from 
 Friday  morning  till  the  Sabbath-evening  following,  July  12. 
 1739.  when  1  was  walking  again  in  the  fame  folitary  place, 
 v;here  I  was  brought  to  fee  myfclf  loft  and  helplefs,  (as  was 
 l-.efore  mentioned) :  and  here,  in  a  mournful  melancholy  ftate, 
 ''v'as  attempting  to  pray ;  but  found  no  heart  to  engage  in  that 
 or  any  other  duty  ;  my  former  concern  and  exercife,  and  re- 
 lijiouo  affei'lions  were  now  gone.  I  thought,  the  Spirit  of 
 God  had  quite  left  me ;  but  ftiil  was  not  diftreilcd  :  yet  diC- 
 
 co^i  folate, 
 
Mt.^^,         iM  R     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  13 
 
 confolate,  as  if  there  was  nothing  in  heaven  or  earth  could 
 make  me  happy.  And  having  been  thus  endeavouring  to 
 pray  (though  being,  as  I  thought,  very  ftupid  and  fenfelefs) 
 tor  near  half  an  hour,  (and  by  this  time  the  fun  was  about 
 half  an  hour  high,  as  1  remember),  then,  as  I  was  walking  in 
 a  dark  thick  grove,  imfpeakable  glory  feemcd  to  open  to  the 
 view  and  apprehenfion  of  my  foul :  1  do  not  mean  any  external 
 brightnefs,  for  I  law  no  iiich  thing ;  nor  do  I  intend  any 
 im.agination  of  a  body  of  light,  fome  where  away  in  the 
 third  heavens,  or  any  thing  of  that  nature ;  but  it  was  a  new 
 inward  apprehenfion  or  view  that  1  had  of  God,  fuch  as  I 
 never  had  before,  nor  any  thing  which  had  the  leaft  refera- 
 blancc  of  it.  I  flood  flill,  and  wondered  and  admired  1  I 
 knew  that  I  never  had  feen  before  any  thing  comparable  to  it 
 for  excellency  and  beauty  ;  it  was  widely  different  from  all  the 
 conceptions  that  ever  I  had  had  of  God,  or  things  divine. 
 I  had  no  particular  apprehenlion  of  any  one  perion  in  the 
 Trinity,  either  the  Fatner,  the  Son,  or  the  Holy  Ghoft; 
 but  it  appeared  to  be  divine  ghry,  that  I  then  beheld :  and 
 my  foul  rejoiced  ivith  joy  tajpealuble,  to  fee  fuch  a  God, 
 fuch  a  glorious  divine  Being  ;  and  1  was  inwardly  pleafed  and 
 fatisfied,  that  he  fhould  be  God  over  all  for  ever  and  ever. 
 My  foul  was  fo  captivated  and  delighted  with  the  excellency, 
 lovelinefs,  greatnefs,  and  other  perfeftions  of  God,  that  I 
 was  even  fwallowed  up  in  him ;  at  leaft  to  that  degree,  that 
 I  had  no  thought  (as  I  remember)  at  firfi,  about  my  own 
 falvation,  and  Icarce  reflefled  there  was  fuch  a  creature  as 
 myfelf. 
 
 Thus  God,  I  truft,  brought  me  to  a  hearty  difpofition  to 
 gxalt  him,  and  fet  him  on  the  throne,  and  principally  and 
 ultimately  to  aim  at  his  honour  and  glory,  as  King  of  the 
 univerfe. 
 
 I  continued  in  this  flate  of  inward  joy  and  peace,  yet 
 aftonifhment,  till  near  dark,  without  any  fenfible  abatement; 
 and  then  began  to  think  and  examine  what  I  had  feen ;  and 
 felt  fweetly  compofed  in  my  mind  all  the  evening  following-. 
 I  felt  myfelf  in  a  new  world,  and  every  thing  about  me  ap- 
 peared w'ith  a  different  afpeft  from  what  it  was  wont  10 
 do. 
 
 At  this  time,  the  ivay  of  falvation  opened  to  me  with  fuch 
 infinite  wifdom,  fuitablenefs,  and  excellency,  that  I  wondered 
 I  fliould  ever  think  of  any  other  way  of  falvation  ;  was  a- 
 mazed,  that  I  had  not  dropped  my  own  contrivances,  and 
 complied  with  this  lovely,  bleffed,  and  excellent  way  before. 
 If  I   could  have  been  faved  by  my  own  dutic?,  or  any  other 
 
 way 
 
14  T  H  E     L  I  r  E     O  F  A,D.  1739. 
 
 •way  that  I  had  formerly  contrived,  my  whole  foul  would  now 
 have  refufed.  I  wondered,  that  all  the  world  did  not  fee  and 
 comply  with  this  way  of  falvation,  entirely  by  the  righteouf- 
 nefs  of  Chrifl. 
 
 The  fweet  relilh  of  what  I  then  felt,  continued  with  me 
 for  feveral  days,  almoft  conftantly,  in  a  greater  or  lefs  degree; 
 I  could  not  but  fwcctly  rejoice  in  God_,  lying  down  and  rifing 
 up.  The  next  Lord's  day  I  felt  fomething  of  the  fame  kind, 
 though  not  fo  powerful  as  before.  But,  not  long  after, 
 •was  again  involved  in  thick  darkness,  and  under  great  diftrefs; 
 yet  not  of  the  fame  kind  with  my  diftrefs  under  conviftions. 
 I  was  guilty,  afraid,  and  afhamed  to  come  before  God  ;  was 
 exceedingly  preflcd  with  a  fenfe  of  guilt:  but  it  was  not  long 
 before  I  felt  (I  truft)  true  repentance  and  joy  in  God. 
 
 About  the  latter  end  of  Auguft,  I  again  fell  under  great 
 darknefs;  it  feemcd  as  if  the  prefence  of  God  was  clean  gone 
 for  truer;  though  I  was  not  fo  much  diflreffed  about  my 
 fpiritual  flate,  as  I  was  at  my  being  Ihut  out  from  God's  pre- 
 fence, as  I  then  fenfibly  was.  But  it  plcafed  the  Lord  to  re- 
 turn gracioufly  to  me,  not  long  after. 
 
 In  the  beginning  of  September  I  went  to  college  *,  and 
 entered  tlicre  ;  but  with  Ibme  deriee  of  reluftancy,  fearing 
 left   I   fhouid  iiot  be  able  to  lead  a  life  of  ftridl   religion,    in 
 
 the   midft  of  fo  many  temptations. After  this,  in  the 
 
 vacancy,  before  I  went  to  tarry  at  college,  it  pleafed  God  to 
 vifit  my  foul  with  clearer  manifeftations  of  himfelf  and  his 
 grace.  I  was  fpencing  fome  time  in  prayer,  and  felf-examina- 
 tion ;  and  the  Lord  by  his  grace  fo  (hined  into  my  heart, 
 that  I  enjoyed  full  alfurance  of  his  favour,  for  that  time ; 
 and  my  foul  was  unfpeakably  refreflicd  with  divine  and  heaven- 
 ly enjoyments.  At  this  time  cfpccially,  as  well  as  fome  others, 
 fundry  paffages  of  God's  word  opened  to  my  foul  with  divine 
 clearncfs,  power,  and  fwe?tnefs,  fo  as  to  appear  exceeding 
 precious,  and  v.'ith  clear  and  certain  evidence  of  its  being 
 the  word  of  Grd.  I  enjoyed  confiderable  fweetnefs  in  re- 
 ligion all  the  winter  following. 
 
 In  Jan.  17;? 9— -40,  the  meailes  fpread  much  in  college; 
 and  I  having  taken  the  diftemper,  v.'Cnt  home  to  Haddam. 
 But  forric  days  before  I  was  taken  fick,  I  fccmed  to  be  great- 
 ly defcrted,  and  my  foul  mourned  the  ablence  of  the  Comfort- 
 er exceedingly:  it  feemcd  to  me,  all  comfort  was  forever 
 gone;  1  prayed  and  cried  to  God  i or  help,  yet  found  no  pre- 
 fent  comioit  or  relief.     But  through  divine  goodnefs,  a  night 
 
 *  Yalc-coHege  in  New-IIuvei. 
 
 or 
 
JEt.  23.         Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  15 
 
 or  two  before  I  was  taken  ill,  while  I  was  walking  alone  in  a 
 very  retired  place,  and  engaged  in  meditation  and  prayer, 
 I  enjoyed  a  fweet  refrcfbing  vifit,  as  I  truft,  from  above,  fo 
 that  my  foul  was  raifed  far  above  the  fears  of  death ;  indeed 
 I  rather  longed  for  death,  than  feared  it.  O  how  much  more 
 retrefhing  this  one  feafon  was,  than  all  the  pleafures  and 
 deJights  that  earth  can  afford  !  After  a  day  or  two  I  was 
 taken  with  the  meafles,  and  was  very  ill  indeed/  fo  that  I 
 almofl  defpaired  of  life  ;  but  had  no  difaeiring  fears  of 
 death  at  all.  However,  through  divine  goodnefs  I  foon  re- 
 covered :  yet,  by  reafon  of  hard  and  clofe  Audics,  and  being 
 much  expofcd  on  account  of  my  frefhman-fliip,  I  had  but 
 little  time  for  fpiritual  duties  ;  my  foul  often  mourned  for 
 want  of  more  time  and  opportunity  to  be  alone  with  God. 
 In  the  Spring  and  Summer  following,  J  had  better  advantages 
 for  retirement,  and  enjoyed  more  comfort  in  religion : 
 though  indeed  my  ambition  in  my  ftudies  greatly  wronged 
 the  activity  and  vigour  of  my  fpiritual  life  :  yet  this  was  ufual- 
 ly  the  cafe  with  me,  that  "  in  the  multitude  of  my  thoughts 
 **  within  me,  God's  covafons  principally  delighted  my  foul;" 
 thefe  were  my  greateft  confolations  day  by  day. 
 
 One  day  1  remember  in  particular,  (I  think  it  was  in  June 
 1740),  I  walked  to  a  confidcrable  dillance  from  the  college, 
 in  the  fields  alone  at  noon,  and  in  prayer  found  fuch  unfpeak- 
 able  fweetnefs  and  delight  in  God,  that  I  thought,  if  I  muffc 
 continue  flill  in  this  evil  world,  I  wanted  aKvays  to  be  there, 
 to  behold  God's  glory :  my  foul  dearly  loved  all  mankind,  and 
 longed  exceedingly  that  they  fhould  enjoy  what  I  enjoyed. 
 It  feemed  to  be  a  little  refemblance  of  heaven. 
 
 On  Lord's  day,  July  6.  being  facrament-day,  I  found  fome 
 divine  life  and  fpiritual  refrefhment  in  that  holy  ordinance. 
 When  I  came  from  the  Lord's  table,  I  wondered  how  my  fel- 
 
 low-lludents  could  live  as   I  was  fenfible  moft  did. Next 
 
 Lord's  day,  July  13.  I  had  fome  fpecial  fweetnefs  in  religion. 
 
 Again,  Lord's  day,  July  20.  my  foul  was  in  a  fweet  and 
 
 precious  frame. 
 
 Some  time  in  Auguft  following,  I  became  fo  weakly  and 
 difordercd,  by  too  clofe  application  to  my  fludies,  that  I  was 
 advifed  by  my  tutor  to  go  home,  and  difengage  my  mind 
 frem  fludy,  as  much  as  I  couid;  for  I  was  grown  fo  weak, 
 that  I  began  to  fpit  blood.  I  took  his  advice,  and  endea- 
 voured to  lay  afide  my  ftudies.  But  being  brought  very 
 low,  I  locked  death  in  the  face  more  ftedfaftly  ;  and  the  Lord 
 was  pleafed  to  give  me  renewcdly  a  fweet  fenfe  and  relifh  of 
 divine  things-  and  particularly  in  Oftcber  1.3.  I  found  divine 
 
 help 
 
i(i  T  H  E     L  1  r  E     O  F  J.  D.  r74#. 
 
 help  and  confolation  in  the  precious  duties  of  fecret  prayer 
 and  fclf-examination,  and  my  loui  took  delight  in  the  blclFed 
 God;— -fo  likewile  on  the  17th  of  Oftober. 
 
 Saturday,  Oftober  18.  in  my  morning  devotions,  my 
 foul  was  exceedingly  melted  for,  and  bitterly  mourned  over 
 jny  exceeding  fmfulmfs  and  vilenefs.  I  never  before  had 
 felt  fo  pungent  and  deep  a  fenfe  of  the  odious  nature  of  fin, 
 as  at  this  time.  My  foul  was  then  unufually  carried  forth  in 
 love  to  God,  and  had  a  lively  fenfe  of  God's  love  to  me. 
 And  this  love  and  hope,  at  that  time,  cafl  out  fear.  Both 
 morning  and  evening  I  fpent  fome  time  in  felf-examination, 
 to  find  the  truth  of  grace,  as  alfo  my  fitnefs  to  approach  to 
 God  at  his  table  the  next  day;  and  through  infinite  grace, 
 found  the  holy  Spirit  influencing  my  foul  with  love  to  God, 
 as  a  witnefs  within  myfelf. 
 
 Lord's  day,  Oftober  19.  in  the  morning  I  felt  my  foul 
 hungering  and  th'irji'ing  after  righteoufnefs.  In  the  forenoon, 
 while  I  was  looking  on  the  facramental  elements,  and  think- 
 ing that  Jefus  Chrift  would  foon  be  "  let  forth  crucified  bc- 
 "  fore  me,"  my  foul  was  filled  with  light  and  love,  fo  that 
 I  was  almofl  in  an  ecftafy  ;  my  body  was  io  weak,  I  could 
 fcarcely  fland.  I  felt  at  the  fame  time  an  exceeding  tender- 
 nefs  and  moft  fervent  love  towards  all  mankind  ;  fo  that  my 
 foul  and  all  the  powers  of  it  feemed,  as  it  were,  to  melt  into 
 foftnefs  and  fweetnefs.  But  in  the  feafon  of  the  communion, 
 there  was  fome  abatement  of  this  fweet  life  and  fervour. 
 This  love  and  joy  caft  out  fear  ;  and  my  foul  longed  for  per- 
 fect grace  and  glorj^  This  fweet  frame  continued  till  the 
 evening,  when  my  foul  was  fweetly  fpiritual  in  fecret  duties. 
 Monday,  October  20.  I  again  found  the  fweet  alTiftance 
 ®f  the  holy  Spirit  in  fecret  duties,  both  morning  and  even- 
 ing, and  life  and  comfort  in  religion  through  the  whole 
 day. 
 
 Tuefday,  Oclober  21.  I  had  likewife  experience  of  the 
 goodnefs  of  God  in  "  fneddhig  abroad  his  love  in  my  heart,' 
 and  giving  mc  delight  and  confolation  in  religious  duties  ; 
 and  all  the  remaining  part  of  the  week,  my  foul  feemed  to 
 be  taken  up  with  divine  things.  I  now  fo  longed  after  God, 
 and  to  be  freed  from  fm,  that  when  I  felt  myfelf  recovering, 
 and  thought  I  muft  return  to  college  again,  which  had  proved 
 fo  hurtful  to  my  fpiritual  interell  the  year  paft,  I  could  not 
 but  be  grieved,  and  I  thought  I  had  much  rather  have  died; 
 for  it  diftrelfed  me,  to  think  of  getting  away  from  God. 
 I^ut  before  I  went,  I  enjoyed  fcveral  other  fweet  and  precious 
 lea f)ns  of  communion  with  God,  (particularly  Oftober  30. 
 
 andl 
 
Mt^n-      Mr    D  AVID     B  RAIN  ERD.  ly 
 
 and  Nov.  4.},  wherein  my  foul  enjoyed  unfpeakable  com- 
 fort. 
 
 I  returned  to  college  about  November  6.  and  through  the 
 goodnefs  of  God,  felt  the  power  of  religion  almoft  daily,  for 
 the  fpace  of  fix  weeks. 
 
 November  28.  In  ray  evening-devotion,  I  enjoyed  precious 
 difcoveries  of  God,  and  was  unfpeakably  refreihed  with  that 
 palfage,  Heb.  xii.  22.  23.  24.  that  i-ny  foul  longed  to  wing 
 away  for  the  paradife  of  God  ;  I  longed  to  be  conr'ormed  to 
 
 God  in  all  things. A   day  or  two  after,  I  enjoyed  much 
 
 of  the  light  of  God's  countenance,  moll  of  the  day ;  and 
 my  foul  refted  in  God. 
 
 Tuefday,  December  9.  I  was  in  a  comfortable  frame  of 
 foul  moft  of  the  day  ;  but  efpecially  in  evening-devotions^ 
 when  God  was  pleafed  wonderfully  to  affiffc  and  flrengtheu 
 me  ;  fo  that  I  thought  nothing  Ihould  ever  move  me  from 
 the  love  of  God  in  Chrift  Jefus  my  Lord. —  O  !  one  hour  with 
 God  infinitely  exceeds  all  the  pleafures  and  delights  of  this 
 lower  world. 
 
 Some  time  towards  the  latter  end  of  January  1740,-41.  I 
 grew  more  cold  and  dull  in  matters  of  religion,  by  means  of 
 my  old  temptation,  viz.  ambition  in  my  ftudies.— But  throunrh 
 divine  goodnefs,  a  great  and  general  aiuakenmg  fpread  itfelf 
 over  the  college,  about  the  latter  end  of  February,  in  which 
 I  was  much  quickened,  and  more  abundantly  engaged  in  reli- 
 gion. 
 
 [This  awakening  here  fpoken  of,  was  at  the  beginning  of 
 that  extraordinary  religious  commotion  through  the  land, 
 which  is  frefh  in  every  one's  memory.  This  awakening  was 
 for  a  time  very  great  and  general  at  New-Haven  ;  and  the 
 college  had  no  fmall  ihare  in  it :  that  fociety  was  greatly  re- 
 formed, the  fludents  in  general  became  feriou?,  and  many  of 
 them  remarkably  fo,  and  much  engaged  in  the  concerns  of 
 their  eternal  falvation.  And  however  undefirable  the  ilTue  of 
 the  awakenings  of  that  day  have  appeared  in  many  ethers, 
 there  have  been  maniftftly  happy  and  abiding  effedls  of  the 
 imprelfions  then  m.ade  on  the  minds  of  m;iny  of  the  members 
 of  that  college.  And  by  all  that  I  can  learn  concerning  Mr 
 Brainerd,  there  can  be  no  reafon  to  doubt  but  that  he  had 
 much  of  God's  gracious  prefcnce,  and  of  the  lively  at'T:inp-s  of 
 true  grace,  at  that  time  :  but  yet  he  was  afterwards  abundant- 
 ly fcnfible,  that  his  religious  experiences  and  affeftions  at  that 
 time  v/ere  not  free  from  a  corrupt  mixture,  nor  his  conduft 
 ■  C  to 
 
i8  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F     y/.  Z?.  1741.-174Z.' 
 
 to  be.acquitted  from  many  things  that  were  imprudent  and 
 blameable;  which  he  greatly  lamented  himfelf,  and  was  will- 
 ing that  others  fliould  forget,  that  none  might  make  an  ill 
 improvement  of  fiich  an  example.  And  therefore  although  in 
 the  time  of  it,  he  kept  a  conftant  diary,  containing  a  very 
 particular  account  of  what  paffed  from  day  to  day,  for  the 
 next  thirteen  months,  from  the  latter  end  of  January  1740,— 
 41.  forementioned,  in  two  fmall  books,  which  he  called  the 
 two  firft  yolumts  of  his  diary,  next  fallowing  the  account  be- 
 fore given  of  his  conviftions,  converlion,  and  confequent 
 comforts;  yet,  when  he  lay  on  his  death-bed,  he  gave  order 
 (unknown  to  me,  till  after  his  dearh)  that  thefe  two  volumes 
 fhould  be  deflroyed,  and  in  the  beginning  of  the  third  book  of 
 his  diary,  he  wrote  thus,  (by  the  hand  of  another,  he  not  be- 
 ing able  to  write  himfelf),  "  The  two  preceding  volumes.,  im- 
 "  mediately  following  the  account  of  the  author's  converfion, 
 "  are  loft.  If  any  are  defirous  to  know  how  the  author  li- 
 "  ved,  in  genera!,  during, that  fpace  of  time,  let  them  read 
 "  the  firft  thiuty  pages  of  this, volume;  where  they  will  find 
 "  fomething  of  a  fpecimen  of  his  ordinary  manner  of  livingy^ 
 "  through  that  whole  fpace  of  time,  which  was  about  thirteen 
 "  months;  excepting  that  here  he  was  more  refined  from 
 ''  fonie  imprudencles  and  Indecent  heatSy  than  there  ;  but  the 
 *'  fpirit  of  devotion  running  through  the  whole,  was  the 
 "  fame." 
 
 It  could  not  be  otherwife  than  that  one  whofe  heart  had 
 been  fo  prepared  and  drawn  to  God,  as  Tvjr  Brainerd's  had 
 been,  faouid  be  mightily  enlarged,  animated,  and  engaged  at 
 the  fight  of  fuch  an  alteration  made  in  the  college,  the  tov/n, 
 and  laud;  and  \h  great  an  appearance  of  mens  reforming  their 
 lives,  and  turning  from  their  profanenefs  and  immorality,  to 
 ferioufnefs  and  concern  for  their  falvation,  and  of  religion's 
 reviving  and  flouriibing  almofi  every  where.  But  as  an  in- 
 temperate imprudent  zeal,  and  a  degree  of  enthufiafm  foon 
 crept  in,  and  mingled  itfelf  with  that  revival  of  religion  ;  and 
 fo  great  and  general  an  awakening  being  quite  a  new  thing 
 in  the  land,  at  lead  as  to  all  the  living  inhabitants  of  it;  nei- 
 ther people  nor  minifters  had  learned  thoroughly  to  difiin- 
 guifli  between  folid religion  and  its  delufive  counterfeits;  even 
 many  minifiers  of  the  gofpel,  of  long  (landing  and  the  beft 
 ropu ration,  were  for  a  time  overpowered  with  the  glaring  ap- 
 pearances of  the  latter  :  and  therefore  furely  it  was  not  to  be 
 wondered  at,  that  young  Brainerd,  but  a  fophimore  at  col- 
 lege, fhould  be  fo ;  who  was  not  only  young  in  years,  but 
 very  young  in  religion  and  experience;  and  had  had  but  little 
 
 opportunity 
 
/Et.22''2.4.     Mr    DAVID     BRAINERD.  19 
 
 opportunity  for  the  ftudy  of  divinity,  and  ftill  lefs  for  cbfer» 
 vation  of  the  circumftances  and  events  of  fuch  an  extraoi'di- 
 nary  ftate  of  things :  a  man  mud  divcft  himfelf  of  all  reafon, 
 to  make  Arrange  of  it.  In  thefe  difadvantageous  circumflan- 
 ces,  Brainerd  had  the  unhappinefs  to  have  a  tindure  of  that 
 intemperate  indifcreet  zeal,  which  was  at  that  time  too  pre- 
 valent; and  was  led,  from  his  high  opinion  of  others  that  he 
 looked  upon  better  than  himfelf,  into  fuch  errors  as  were 
 really  contrary  to  the  habitual  temper  of  his  m.ind.  One  in- 
 ftance  of  his  mifconduft  at  that  time,  gave  great  offence  to 
 the  rulers  of  the  college,  even  to  that  degree  that  they  expelled 
 him  the  focicty ;  which  it  is  neceffary  fhould  here  be  parti- 
 cularly related,  witii  its  circumftances. 
 
 In  the  time  of  the  awakening  at  college,  there  were  feveral 
 religious  ftudents  that  affociated  themfelves  one  with  another 
 for  mutual  converfation  and  afliftance  in  fpiritual  things,  who 
 were  wont  freely  to  open  themfelves  one  to  another,  as  fpe- 
 x;ial  and  intimate  friends :  Brainerd  v/as  one  of  this  company. 
 And  it  once  happened,  that  he  and  two  or  three  more  of  thefe 
 his  intimate  friends  were  in  the  hall  together,  after  Mr  Whit- 
 telfey,  one  of  the  tutors,  had  been  to  prayer  there  with  the 
 fcholars ;  no  other  perfon  now  remaining  in  the  hall,  but 
 Brainerd  and  thefe  his  companions.  Mr  Whittclfey  having 
 been  unufually  pathetical  in  his  prayer,  one  of  Brainerd's 
 friends  on  this  occafion  afked  him  what  he  thought  of  Mr 
 Whittelfcy ;  he  made  anfw.er,  "  He  has  ho  more  grace  than 
 *'  this  chair."  One  of  the  fre/hmen  happening  at  that  time 
 to  be  near  the  hall  (though  not  in  the  room)  over-heard  thofe 
 words  of  his  ;  though  he  heard  no  name  mentioned,  and 
 knew  not  who  the  perfon  was,  which  was  thus  cenfured : 
 he  informed  a  certain  woman  that  belonged  to  the  town, 
 withal  telling  her  his  own  fufpieion,  viz.  that  he  believed 
 Brainerd  faid  this  of  fome  one  or  other  of  the  rulers  of  the 
 college.  Whereupon  (he  went  and  informed  the  rc6lor, 
 who  fent  for  this  frelhman  and  examined  him ;  and  he 
 told  the  redlor  the  words  that  he  heard  Brainerd  utter, 
 and  informed  him  who  were  in  the  room  with  him  at  that 
 lime.  Upon  which  the  reftor  fent  for  them  :  they  were 
 very  backward  to  inform  againft  their  friend^  of  that  which 
 they  looked  upon  as  private  converfation,  and  efpecially  as 
 none  but  they  had  heard  or  knew  of  whom  he  had  uttered 
 thofe  words;  yet  the  recfcor  compelled  them  to  declare  what 
 
 he  faid,  and  of  whom   he    faid   it. Brainerd    looked  on 
 
 himfelf  greatly  abufed  in  the  management  of  this  affair ;  and 
 
 C  2  thought, 
 
!•  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F  A.  D.  1742. 
 
 thought,  that  what  he  faid  in  private,  was  injurioufly  extort- 
 ed from  his  friends,  and  that  then  it  was  injuriouily  requi- 
 red of  him  (as  it  was  wont  to  be  of  fuch  as  had  been  guilty 
 of  fome  open  notorious  crime)  to  make  a  public  confeffion, 
 and  to  humble  himfelf  before  the  whole  college  in  the  hall, 
 
 for  what  he  had  faid  only  in  private  converfation. He  not 
 
 complying  with  this  demand,  and  having  gone  once  to  the  fe- 
 parate  meeting  at  New-Haven,  when  forbidden  by  the  reftor, 
 and  alfo  having  been  accufed  by  one  perfon  of  faying  concern- 
 ing the  reftor,  that  he  wondered  he  did  not  cxpe£l  to  drop 
 down  dead  for  fining  the  fcholars  who  followed  Mr  Tennent 
 to  Milford,  though  there  was  no  proof  of  it,  (and  Mr  Brain- 
 crd  ever  profeffed  that  he  did  not  remember  his  faying  any 
 thing  to  that  purpofe);  for  thefe  things  he  was  expelled  the 
 college. 
 
 Now,  how  far  the  circumftances  and  exigences  of  that  day 
 might  juftify  fuch  great  fe verity  in  the  governors  of  the 
 college,  I  will  not  undertake  to  determine  ;  it  being  my  aim, 
 not  to  bring  reproach  on  the  authority  of  the  college,  but 
 only  to  do  juftice  to  the  memory  of  a  perfcin,  who  I  think  to 
 be  eminently  one  of  thofewhofe  memory  isblejjed.- — The  reader 
 will  fee,  in  the  fecjuel  of  the  ftory  of  Mr  Brainerd's  lif'e  *, 
 what  his  own  thoughts  afterwards  were  of  his  behaviour  in 
 thefe  things,  and  in  how  Chriftian  a  manner  he  condufled 
 himfelf,  with  refpeft  to  this  affair :  though  he  ever,  as  long 
 as  he  lived,  fuppofed  himfelf  much  abufed,  in  the  manage- 
 ment of  it,  and  in  what  he  fufFered  in  it. 
 
 His  expulfion  was  in  the  winter  anno  1 741-2.  while  he 
 was  in  his  third  year  in  college.] 
 
 *  Particularly  under  the  date,  Wedncfday,  Sept.  14.  17430 
 
 PART 
 
PART       11. 
 
 From  about  the  time  that  he  firfl  began  to 
 devote  himfelf  more  efpecially  to  the  Jiudy 
 of  divinity  till  he  was  examined  and  licen- 
 fed  to  preach,  by  the  AfTociation  of  miniflers 
 belonging  to  the  Eaftern  diflridt  of  the 
 county  of  Fairfield  in  Conne(5licut. 
 
 [Ti  TR  Bra'iaerd,  the  Spring  after  his  expulfion,  went  t» 
 XVjL  live  with  the  Reverend  Mr  Mills  of  Ripton,  to  fol- 
 low his  ftudies  with  him,  in  order  to  his  being  fitted  for  the 
 work  of  the  miniflry ;  where  he  fpent  the  greater  part  of  the 
 time  till  the  Affociation  licenfed  him  to  preach  ;  but  fre- 
 quently rode  to  vifit  the  neighbouring  miniflers,  particularly 
 Mr  Cooke  of  Stratfi:ld,  Mr  Graham  of  Southbury,  and  Mr 
 Bellamy  of  Bethlehem. 
 
 Here  (at  Mr  MilL's)  he  began  the  third  book  of  his  diary., 
 in  which  the  account  he  wrote  of  himfelf,  is  as  follows.] 
 
 Thurfday,  April  i.  1742.  I  feem  to  be  declining  with  re- 
 fpecSt  to  my  life  and  warmth  in  divine  things;  had  not  fo  free 
 accefs  to  God  in  prayer  as  ufual  of  late.  O  that  God 
 would  humble  me  deeply  in  the  duft  before  him !  1  deferve 
 hell  every  day,  for  not  loving  my  Lord  more,  "  who  has  (I 
 truft)  loved  me,  and  given  himfelf  for  me ;"  and  every  time 
 I  am  enabled  to  exerciie  any  grace  renewedly,  I  am  renew- 
 edly  indebted  to  the  God  of  all  grace  for  fpecial  afTiftance. 
 **  VVhere  then  is  boaftingf  Surely  "it  is  excluded,"  when 
 we  think  how  we  are  dependent  on  God  for  the  being  and 
 every  a6l  of  grace.  Oh,  if  ever  I  get  to  heaven,  it  will  be 
 becaufe  God  will,  and  nothing  elfe  ;  for  I  never  did  any  thing 
 of  myfelf,  but  get  away  from  God!  My  foul  will  be  aftonifh- 
 ed  at  the  unfearchable  riches  of  divine  grace,  when  I  arrive  at 
 the  manfions,  which  the  blefTcd  Saviour  is  gone  befor<;  to 
 prepare. 
 
 I    Friday,  April  2.     In  the  afternoon  I  felt  foniething  fweet?^ 
 
 ly 
 
22  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  J.  D.  1742. 
 
 ly  in  fecret  prayer,  much  refigned,  calm,  and  ferene.  What 
 are  all  the  (lorms  of  this  lower  world,  \i  Jefus  by  his  Spirit 
 does  but  come  walking  on  the  feas  .' — Some  time  paft,  1  had 
 much  pleafure  in  the  profpefl  of  the  Heathen's  being  brought 
 home  to  Chrift^  and  defired  that  the  Lord  would  improve  me 
 in  that  work  :~but  now  my  foul  more  frequently  defires  to 
 die,  to  be  with  Chr':j}.  O  that  my  foul  were  wrapt  up  in 
 divine  love,  and  my  longing  defires  after  God  increafed! — In 
 the  evening,  was  refreflied  in  prayer,  with  the  hopes  of  the 
 advancement  of  Chrifl's  kingdom  in  the  world. 
 
 Saturday,  April  3.  Was  very  much  amifs  this  morning, 
 and  had  an  ill  night  laft:  night.  I  thought,  if  God  would  take 
 me  to  himfelf  now,  my  foul  would  exceedingly  rejoice.  O 
 that  I  may  be  always  humble  and  refigned  to  God,  and  that 
 God  would  caufe  my  foul  to  be  more  fixed  on  himfelf,  that 
 I  may  be  more  fitted  both  for  doing  and  fuffering ! 
 
 Lord's  day,  April  4.   My  heart  was  wandering  and  lifelefs. 
 
 In  the   evening  God  gave  me  faith  in  prayer,  and  made 
 
 my  foul  melt  in  fome  meafure,  and  gave  me  to  taft:e  a  divine 
 fweetnefs. — O  my  blefi^ed  God  !  Let  me  climb  up  near  to 
 him,  and  love,  and  long,  and  plead,  and  wreftle,  and  reach, 
 and  ftretch  after  him,  and  for  deliverance  from  the  body  of 
 fin  and  death.— Alas !  my  foul  mourned  to  think  I  ihould  ever 
 lofe  fight  of  its  beloved  again.  "  O  come.  Lord  Jefus, 
 «  Amen." 
 
 [On  the  evening  of  the  next  day,  he  complains  that  he 
 feemed  to  be  void  of  all  relifli  of  divine  things,  felt  much  of 
 the  prevalence  of  corruption,  and  faw  in  himfelf  a  difpofition 
 to  all  manner  of  fin ;  which  brought  a  very  great  gloom  on 
 his  mind,  and  cart  him  down  into  the  depths  of  melancholy ; 
 fo  that  he  fpeaks  of  himfelf  as  afiionifiied,  amazed,  having  no 
 comfort,  being  filled  with  horror,  feeing  no  comfort  in  hea- 
 ven or  earth.] 
 
 Tuefday,  April  6.  I  walked  out  this  morning  to  the  fame 
 place  where  I  was  laft  night,  and  felt  fomething  as  I  did  then; 
 but  was  fomethmg  relieved  by  reading  fome  pafTages  in  my 
 diary,  and  fcemed  to  feel  as  if  I  m.ight  pray  to  the  great  God 
 again  with  freedom ;  but  v/as  fuddenly  ftruck  with  a  damp, 
 
 from  the  fenfe  I  had  of  my  own  vilenefs. Then  I  cried 
 
 to  God  to  wafh  my  foul,  and  cleanfe  me  from  m,y  exceeding 
 filthinefs,  to  give  me  repentance  and  pardon  ;  and  it  began  to 
 be  fomething  iwect,  to  pray. And  I  could  think  of  under- 
 going the  greateft  fufferings  in  the  caufe  of  Chrift,  with  plea- 
 fure; and  found  my felf  willing  (if  Gcd  fiiould  fo  order  it)  to 
 
 fuifer 
 
JEt.24'        Ma    BAVID     BRAINERD,      '    23 
 
 fufFer  bani(hment  from  my  native  land,  among  the  Heathen, 
 that  I  might  do  fomething  for  their   fouls    lalvation,  in  di- 
 
 ftreffes   and  deaths  of  any  kind. Then   God  gave   me  to 
 
 wreftle  earneftly  for  others,  for  the  kingdom  of  Chrift  in  the 
 
 world,  and  for  dear  Chriftian  friends. 1  felt  weaned  from 
 
 the  world,  and  from  my  own  reputation  amongft  men,  willing 
 to  be  defpifed,  and  to  be  a  gazing-ftock  for  the  world  to  be- 
 hold.  it  is  impofTible  for  me  to  exprefs  how  I  then  felt : 
 
 I  had  not  much  joy,  but  fome  fenie  of  the  majefly  of  God, 
 which  made  me  as  it  were  tremble  :  I  faw  myfelf  mean  and 
 vile,  whicn  made  me  more  willing  that  God  fhould  do  what 
 he  would  with  me ;  it  was  all  infinitely  reafonable. 
 
 Wednefday,  April  7.  I  had  not  fo  much  fervency,  but  felt 
 
 fomething  as  I  did  yefterday-morning,  in  prayer. At  noon 
 
 I  fpent  fome  time  in  fecret,  with  fome  fervency,  but  fcarce 
 any  fsveetnefs;  and  felt  very  dull  in  the  evening. 
 
 Thurfday,  April  8.  Had  raifed  hopes  to-day  refpefling  the 
 Heathen.  O  that  God  would  bring  in  great  numbers  of  them 
 to  Jefus  Chrift !     I  cannot  but  hope  I  ihall  fee  that  glorious 
 
 day. Every  thing  in  this  world  feems  exceeding  vile  and 
 
 little  to  me:  I  look  fo  to  myfelf. 1  had  fome  little  dawn  of 
 
 comfort  to-day  in  prayer :  but  efpecially  to-night  I  think  I 
 had  fome  faith  and  power  of  intercelfion  xj'ith.  God,  was  en- 
 abled to  plead  with  God  for  the  growth  of  grace  in  myfelf; 
 and  many  of  the  dear  children  of  God  then  lay  Y»'ith  weight 
 upon  my  foul.  BleiTed  be  the  Lord  !  It  is  good  to  wreltle 
 for  divine  blelTmgs. 
 
 Friday,  April  9.  Molt  of  my  time  in  mornlng-dcvoticn  was 
 fpent  without  fenfible  fweetnefs ;  yet  I  had  one  delightful 
 profpefl:  of  arriving  at  the  heavenly  world.  I  am  more  amazed 
 than  ever  at  fuch  thoughts ;  for  I  fee  myfelf  infinitely  viie 
 and  unworthy.  I  feel  very  heartlefs  and  dull ;  and  though  I 
 long  for  the  pre  fence  of  God,  and  feem  conilantly  to  reach 
 towards  God  in  defires,  yet  I  cannot  feel  that  divine  and  hea- 
 venly fweetnefs  that  I  ufed   to  enjoy. No  poor  creature 
 
 ftands  in  need  of  divine  grace  more  than  I,  and  none  abufe  it 
 more  than  I  have  done,  and  ftlll  do. 
 
 Saturday,  April  10.  Spent  much  time  in  fecret  prayer  this 
 morning,  and  not  without  fome  comfort  in  divine  things,  and 
 I  hope  had  fome  faith  in  exercife :  but  am  fo  low,  and  feel 
 fo  little  of  the  fenfible  prefence  of  God,  that  I  hardly  know 
 what  to  call  faith,  and  am  made  to  "  polTefs  the  fins  of  my 
 **  youth,"  and  the  dreadful  fin  of  my  nature,  and  am  all  fin; 
 
 I  cannot  think,  nor  adt,  but  every  motion  is  fin. J   feel 
 
 fome  faint  hopes,  that  God  will;,  ®f  his  infinite  mercy,  return 
 
 again 
 
^•4  THELI^EOP  ^.B,  1742. 
 
 again  with  fliowers  of  converting  grace  to  poor  gofpel-abufing 
 finners;  and  my  hopes  of  being  improved  in  the  caufe  of 
 God,  which  of  late  have  been  almoft  extin*^,  feem  now  a- 
 little  revived.  O  that  all  my  late  diflreffes  and  awful  appre- 
 henfions  might  prove  but  ChrifVs  fchool,  to  make  me  fit 
 for  greater  fervice,  by  learning  me  the  great  leffon  of  humi- 
 lity! 
 
 Lord's  day,  April  11.  In  the  morning,  felt  but  little  life, 
 excepting  that  my  heart  was  fomething  drawn  out  in  thank- 
 fulnefs  to  God  for  his  amazing  grace  and  condefcenlion  to  me, 
 
 in  part  influences  and  alFiIlances  of  his  Spirit. Afterwards 
 
 had  fome  fwcctnefo  in  the  thoughts  of  arriving  at  the  heaven- 
 ly v/orld.     O  for  die  happy  day  I After  public  worfhip 
 
 God  gave  me  fpecial  alfilfance  in  prayer;  I  wreftled  with  ray 
 dear  Lord,  with  much  fweetnefs;  and  interceffion  was  made 
 a  fweet  and  delightful  employment  to  me. In  the  even- 
 ing, as  I  was  viewing  the  light  in  the  north,  was  delighted 
 in  contemplation  on  the  glorious  morning  of  the  refurrec^ 
 tion. 
 
 Monday,  April  i2.  This  morning  the  Lord  was  pleafed  to 
 lift  up  the  light  of  his  countenance  upon  me  in  fecret 
 prayer,  and  made  the  feafon  very  precious  to  my  foul.  And 
 though  I  have  been  (o  depreffed  of  late,  refpefting  my  hopes 
 of  future  ferviceablenels  in  the  caufe  of  God  ;  yet  now  I  had 
 much  encouragement  refpecting  that  matter.  I  was  fpecially 
 affiled  to  intercede  and  plead  for  poor  fouls,  and  for  the  en- 
 largement of  ChrilVs  kingdom  in  the  world,  and  for  fpecial 
 grace  for  myfclf,  to  fit  me  for  fpecial  fervices.  I  felt  ex- 
 ceeding calm,  and  quite  refigned  to  God,  refpefting  my  fu- 
 ture improvement,  "johen  and  ivhere  he  pleafed  :  my  faith  lift- 
 ed me  above  the  world,  and  removed  all  thofe  mountains, 
 that  I  could  not  look  over  of  late :  I  thought  I  wanted  not 
 the  favour  of  man  to  lean  upon ;  for  I  knew  Chrift's  favour 
 was  infinitely  better,  and  that  it  was  no  matter  ivhen,  nor 
 where,  nor  horv  Chrifl  fliould  fend  me,  nor  what  trials  he 
 ihould  ftill  exercife  me  with,  if  I  might  be  prepared  for  his 
 work  and  will.  I  now  found  fweetly  revived  in  my  mind 
 the  wonderful  difcovery  of  infinite  wifdom  in  all  the  difpen- 
 l.uions  of  God  towards  me,  which  I  had  a  little  before  I  met 
 with  my  great  trial  at  college;  every  thing  appeared  full  of 
 the  wifdom  of  God. 
 
 Tuefday,  April  13.   Saw  myfclf  to  be  very  mean  and  vile  ; 
 wondered  at  thofe  that  flicwed  me  refpecl.     Aftemvards  was 
 fomething  comforted  in  fecret  retirement,   and  was  aflifted  to 
 wreftlc  with  God,  with  fomc  power,  fpiritualrty,  and  fweet- 
 nefs. 
 
^f.  -25.        -Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  -25 
 
 Kefs.  BlefTed  be  the  Lord,  he  is  never  unmindful  of  me,  but 
 always  fends  me  needed  fupplies;  and  from  time  to  time,  when 
 i  am  like  one  de^d,  raifes  me  to  life.  O  that  I  may  never 
 Jiilrufi  infinite  goodnel's ! 
 
 V/ednclday,  April  14.  My  foul  longed  for  communion  with 
 Chriff,  and  for  the  mortification  of  indwelling  corruption,  e- 
 fpecially  fpiritual  pride.  O  there  is  a  fwect  day  comingj, 
 wherein  •■*  the  weary  will  be  at  reft !"  *  I\iy  foul  has  enjoy- 
 ed much  fweetnefs  this  day  in  the  hopes  of  its  fpeedy  ar- 
 rival. 
 
 Thurfay,  April  15.  My  defires  apparently  centered  in  God, 
 ind  I  found  a  fenfible  attraction  of  fjui  after  him  lundry 
 times  to-day  :  I  knov/  I  long  for  God,  and  2  conformity  to  his 
 will,  in  inward  purity  and  nolinefs,  ten  thoufand  times  more 
 than  for  any  thing  here  below. 
 
 Friday  and  Saturday,  April  16.  17.  Seldom  prayed  with- 
 out fome  fenilble  fweetnefs  and  joy  in  the  Lord.  Sometimes 
 I  longed  much  "  to  be  diffolvcd,  and  to  be  with  Chrift."  O 
 that  God  would  enable  me  to  grow  in  grace  evciy  day  !  Alas! 
 my   barrennefs   is  fuch,  that   God  might  well  fay,  "  Cut  it 
 
 "  down." 1   am  afraid  of  a  dead  heart  on  the    Sabbath 
 
 now  begun  :  O  that  Gocl  would  quicken  me  by  his  grace  I 
 
 Lord's  day,  April  i'6.  Retired  early  this  morning  into  the 
 woods  for  prayer  ;  had  the  affifrance  of  God's  Spirit,  and 
 faith  in  exercife,  and  was  enabled  to  plead  with  fervency  foi* 
 the  advancement  of  Chrift's  kingdom  in  the  world,  and  to 
 intercede  for  dear  abfent  friends.— — At  noon,  God  enabled 
 me  to  wreftle  with  him,  and  to  feel  (as  I  trulf)   the  power 
 
 of  divine  love  in  prayer. At  night,  faw  myfelf  infinite^ 
 
 ly  indebted  to  God,  and  had  a  view  of  my  ihortccmings:  it 
 feemed  to  me,  that  I  had  done  as  it  were  nothing  for  God, 
 and  that  I  never  hikdi  lived  to  him  but  a  few  hours  of  my 
 life. 
 
 Monda]/,  April  19.  1  fet  apart  this  day  for  fafting  and 
 prayer  to  God  for  hii  grace,  clpecially  to  piepare  rne  lor  the 
 work  of  the  miaiftry,  to  give  me  divine  aid  and  dlrcftion  in 
 my  preparations  for  that  great  work,  and  in  his  own  time  to 
 "  fend  me  into  his  iiarveft.''  Accordingly,  in  the  mornine, 
 endeavoured  to  plead  for  the  divine  prefencc  for  the  day,  and 
 not  without  fome  life.  In  the  forenoon,  1  felt  a  povicr  of 
 intercefFion  for  precious  immort.iI  foul;,  for  the  advancement 
 of  the  kingdom  of  my  dear  Lord  and  Sa\  iour  in  the  world ; 
 and  withal,  a  moft  fwect  refignation,  and  even  confolaticn  and 
 joy  in  the  thoughts  of  fuffering  hardfnips,  diilreffes,  and  even 
 ika:h  itfslf,  in  the  promotion  of  it  ;  and  had  fpecial  enhu-ge- 
 
26  THE    LIFE    O  F  A.  D,  17^2. 
 
 rnent  In  pleading  for  the  enlightening  and  convcrfion  of  the 
 poor  Heathen.  In  the  afternoon,  "  God  was  with  me  of  a 
 ^'  truth."  O  it  wasblefTed  company  indeed !  God  enabled  me 
 fo  to  agonize  in  'prayer,  that  I  was  quite  wet  with  fwcat, 
 though  in  the  Hiade,  and  the  wind  cool.  My  foul  was  drawn- 
 out  very  much  for  the  world :  I  grafped  for  multitudes  of  fouls. 
 I  think  I  had  more  enlargement  for  fmners,  than  for  the 
 children  of  God ;  though  I  felt  as  if  T  could  fpend  my  life  in 
 cries  for  both.  I  enjoyed  great  fweetncfs  in  communion 
 with  my  dear  Saviour.  I  think  I  never  in  my  life  felt  fuch 
 an  entire  weanednefs  from  this  world,  and  fo  much  refignvd 
 
 to   God  in  every  thing. O  that  I  may  always  live  to  and 
 
 WjSow  my  bleifed  God  !     Amen,  Amen. 
 
 Tuefday,  April  20.  This  day  I  am  twenty-four  years 
 of  age.  O  how  much  mercy  have  I  received  the  year  part! 
 How  often  has  God  "  caufedhis  goodnefs  to  pafs before  me!" 
 And  how  poorly  have  I  anfwered  the  vov.s  I  made  this  time 
 twelvemonth,  to  be  wholly  the  Lord's,  to  be  for  ever  devoted 
 to  his  fervice !     The  Lord  help  me  to  live  more  to  his  glory 
 
 for  time  to  come. This  has  been  a  fweet,  a  happy  day  to 
 
 me :  blelfed  be  God.  I  think  my  foul  was  never  fo  drawn 
 out  in  interceffion  for  others y  as  it  has  been  this  night.  Had 
 a-moft  fervent  wreftle  with  the  Lord  to-night  for  my  enemies  ; 
 and  I  hardly  ever  fo  longed  to  live  to  Cod.,  and  to  be  altogether 
 devoted  to  him ;  t  v/anted  to  WTar  out  my  life  in  his  fervice, 
 and  for  his  glory. 
 
 Wednefday,  April  21.  Felt  much  calmnefs  and  refignation, 
 and  God  again  enabled  me  to  wreftle  for  numbers  of  fouls, 
 and  had  much  fervency  in  the  fweet  duty  of  interceflion.  I 
 enjoy  of  late  more  fwcetnefs  in  interceffion  for  others,  than 
 in  any  other  part  of  prayer.  My  blefled  Lord  really  let  me 
 "  come  near  to  him,  and  plead  with  him.'' 
 
 [The  frame  of  mind,  and  excrcifes  of  foul,  that  he  ex- 
 prefTes  the  three  days  next  following,  Thurfday,  Fridaj'-,  and 
 Saturday,  are  much  of  the  fame  kind  with  thofc  expreffed 
 the  two  days  pafl.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  April  25.  This  morning  fpent  about  two  hours 
 in  fecret  duties,  and  was  enabled  more  than  ordinarily  to  a- 
 gonlze  for  immortal  fouls ;  though  it  was  early  in  the  morn- 
 ing, and  the  fun  fcarcely  fliined  at  all,  yet  my  body  was  quite 
 wet  with  fweat.  Felt  much  prelFed  now,  as  frequently  of 
 late,  to  plead  for  the  meeknefs  and  calmnefs  of  the  Lamb  of 
 God  m  my  foul;  through   divine  goodnefs   felt   much  of  it 
 
 this 
 
7E^  25-        Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  2; 
 
 this  morning.  O  it  is  a  fwcet  difpofition,  heartily  to  for- 
 give all  injuries  done  us;  to  wi/h  our  greateft  enemies  as 
 well  as  we  do  our  own  Ibuls !  Bkiled  Jeius,  may  I  daily  be 
 more  and  more  conformed  to  thee.  At  night  was  exceed- 
 ingly melted  with  divine  love,  and  had  fome  feeling  fenfc  of 
 the  bieffednefs  of  tne  upper  world.  Thofe  words  hung  upon 
 me,  with  much  divine  Iwcetnefs,  Pfal.  Ixxxiv.  7.  "  They  go 
 *'  from  fliength  to  flrength,  every  one  of  them  in  Zion  ap- 
 "  peareth  berore  God."  O  the  near  accefs  that  God 
 fometiracs  gives  us  in  our  addrelfes  to  him  I  This  may  well  be 
 termed   appearing   before   Cod:  it  is  fo   indeed,  in  the  true 
 
 fpintual   fenle,  and  in  the  fvveetefl  fcnfe. 1  think  I  have 
 
 not  had  fuch  power  of  interceffion  thefe  many  months,  both 
 for  God's  cnildren,  and  for  dtad  finners,  as  I  have  had  this 
 evening.  I  willied  and  longed  for  the  coming  of  my  dear 
 Lord :  I  longed  to  join  the  angelic  hofts  in  praifes,  wholly  free 
 from  imperfeftion.  O  the  bleffed  moment  haftens !  All  I 
 want  is  to  be  more  holy,  more  like  my  dear  Lord.  O  for 
 fanftification  !  My  very  foul  pants  for  the  complete  reftora- 
 tion  of  the  bleffed  image  of  my  fweet  Saviour ;  that  I  may  be 
 fit  for  the  bleffed  enjoyments  and  employments  of  the  heaven- 
 ly world. 
 
 Farewell,  vain  world  ;  my  foul  can  bid  Adieu  i 
 My  Saviour' J-  taught  me  to  abandon  you. 
 Tour  charms  may  gratify  afenjuc'  mmd ; 
 Not  pleafe  afoul  wholly  for  God  defign'd. 
 Forbear  Ventice,  ceaje  then  myfoid  to  call.- 
 "'TIS  fix" d  through  grace  ;  my  God  fh all  be  my  all. 
 While  he  thus  lets  me  heavenly  glories  vievj, 
 Tour  beauties  fade,  my  hearfs  no  room  for  you. 
 
 The  Lord  refrefhed  my  foul  with  many  fweet  pafTagcs  of 
 his  worcj.  O  the  new  Jerufalem  !  my  foul  longed  for  it. 
 O  the  fong  of  Mofes  and  the  Lanab!  And  that  bleffed  fong, 
 that  no  man  can  learn,  but  they  that  are  *'  redeemed  from 
 "'  the  earth  I"  and  the  glorious  vjhite  robes,  that  were  given 
 to  "  the  fouls  under  the  altar !" 
 
 Lord ,  Pm  a  flranger  here  alone  ; 
 Earth  no  true  comforts  can  afford: 
 Tety  abfent  from  my  dearefl  one, 
 My  foul  delights  to  cry,   My  Lordl 
 JE'SUS,  my  Lord,  my  only  love, 
 Pojfefs  my  foul,  nor  thence  depart  •• 
 
 D  2  Cr/int 
 
a8  T  H  E    L  I  F  E    O  F  J?-D.  3742-. 
 
 Crant  fne  kind  v  fits,  hceverly  dove ; 
 My  Godjhall  then  have  all  lyiy  heart. 
 
 Monday,  April  26.  Continued  in  a  fv/cet  frame  of  mind; 
 but  in  the  afternoon  telt  fomcthing  of  fpiritual  pride  ftirring. 
 G  jd  was  plcaled  to  make  it  a  humbling  feafon  at  lirft  ;  though 
 afterwards  be  gave  me  iweetneis.  O  my  foul  exceedingly 
 Jongs  for  that  bieffed  fiate  of  perfe6lion  of  deliverai;ce  from 
 
 all  im ! At  night,  Go<\  enabled  me  to  give  my  foul  up  to 
 
 him,  to  call  myielf  upon  him,  to  be  ordered  and  dilpolcd  of 
 according;;  to  his  fovercign  pleafure  ;  and  I  enjoyed  great 
 peace  and  ronlolari;  n  in  fo  doing.  My  foul  took  Iwect  de- 
 light in  God  to-night :  my  thoughts  freely  and  fweetly  center- 
 ed in  him.  O  that  I  could  Ipcnd  every  mom.ent  of  my  life 
 to  his  glory  ! 
 
 Tuefday,  April  27.  Retired  pretty  early  for  fecret  dcvo* 
 tions  ;  and  in  prayer  God  was  pleafed  to  pour  fuch  ineffable 
 comforts  into  my  foul,  that  I  could  do  nothing  for  fome  time 
 but  fny  over  and  over-,  "  Q  my  i'weet  Saviour!  O  my  fwcet 
 **  Saviour!  whom  have  I  in  heaven  but  thee?  and  there  is 
 "  nope  upon  earth,  that  I  defire  befide  thee."'  If  I  had  bad 
 athouland  lives,  my  fjul  would  glndly  have  laid  them  all  do"..  vi 
 at  once  to  have  been  with  Christ.  My  foul  never  enjoyed 
 f  :>  much  of  heaven  before  ;  it  was  the  mod  refined  and  moft 
 fpiritual  feafon  of  communion  with  Cod  I  ever  yet  felt :  I 
 never  felt  (o   great  a  di-.^ree  of  refignation  in  my  life  :  I  felt 
 
 very  f.veetly   all  the    forenoon. In  the  afternoon  I  with- 
 
 drevv  to  meet  with  my  God,  but  found  miyfclf  much  decli- 
 ned, and  Pod  made  it  a  humbling  feafon  to  my  foul :  I  mourn- 
 ed over  the  brtdy  rf  death  that  is  in  me :  it  grieved  me  exceed- 
 ingly, that   I   could  not  pray  to  and  praife    God  with  my 
 
 heart   full  of  divine  heavenly  I've O  that;  my  foul  might 
 
 never   offer  any  dead   cold  fcrviccs   to   m.yGodl In  the 
 
 evening  had  not  fo  much  iweet  divine  /ctt,  as  in. the  morning  i 
 \>\it  )  ad  a  fwect  feafon  of  fervent  intcrcefficn. 
 
 Wednefday,  April  28.  "'vV  ithdrcw  to  my  ufual  place  of  re- 
 tirement \r\  great  pe:tcc  and  tranquillitj',  and  fpent  about  two 
 hour's  in  lecret  duties,  I  felt  much  as  I  did  ycflerday-morn-j 
 ing,  only  weaker  and  more  overccnic.  I  feemed  to  hang 
 and  depend  wholly  on  n\y  dear  Lord ;  wholly  weaned  from 
 all  other  dcpendances.  T  1;new  not  what  to  fay  to  m.y  God, 
 but  only  I'Hii  en  his  Irf.n:,  as  it  were,  and  breathe  out  my 
 d':f.rcs  rft?r  a  perfef^  confcrmity  to  him  in  all  things, 
 Thiifring  dcfres,  and  infatiabie  longings,  pcffcfTed  my  foul 
 after  perfect  hoiinefs:  God  was  fo  precious  to  my  fcui,  ti^at 
 '        •■  Che 
 
jTL  25.         Mr    DAVID     E  R  A  I K  E  R  D.  2f 
 
 the  world  with  all  its  enjoyments  was  infinitely  vile :  I  had 
 no  more  value  for  the  favour  of  men,  than  for  pebbles : 
 The  Lord  was  my  All;  and  he  over-ruled  all;  whick 
 greatly  delighted  mc.  I  think,  my  faith  and  dependance  on 
 God  icarce  ever  rci'e  fo  high.  1  ia\v  him  luch  a  fountain  of 
 goodncfs,  that  it  feemed  impofuble  I  iliouid  diftruft  him  again, 
 or  be  any  way  anxious  about  any  thing  that  fhould  happen  x.o 
 me.  I  now  enjoyed  great  fvveetnefs  in  praying  for  ablent 
 frffcnds,  and  for  the  enlargement  of  Chrili's  kingdom  in  the 
 world.— r/such  of  the  power  of  thefe  divine  enjoyments  rr- 
 
 mained   with   me   tbiuugh   the  day.- In  the  evening  my 
 
 heart  ieemed  fweetly  to  melt,  and,  1  trull,  was  really  humbled 
 for  indwelling  corruption,  and  I  "  mourned  like  a  dove." 
 I  felt  that  all  my  unhappinefs  arole  from  my  being  a  fmner; 
 for  with  refignation  I  could  bid  welcome  all  other  trials;  but 
 fm  hung  heavy  upon  me ;  for  God  diicovercd  to  me  the  cor» 
 ruption  of  my  heart :  fo  that  1  went  to  bed  with  a  heavy 
 licart,  becaufe  I  was  a  (inner  ;  though  T  did  not  in  the  leaft 
 <ioubt  of  God's  love.  O  that  God  v/ould  *'  purge  away  my 
 ""  dro fs,  and  take  away  my  tin,"  and  m.ake  me  ieven  times 
 j-e  fined  ! 
 
 Thurfday,  April  29.  Was  k^pt  ofT  at  a  dillance  from 
 God; — but  had  fome  eniargem-ent  in  intercefTion  for  precious 
 fouls. 
 
 Friday,  April  30.  Was  fomcthing  dejefled  in  fpirit :  nc» 
 thing  grieves  m^e  fo  much,  as  that  I  cannot  live  conllantly  to 
 God's  glory.  I  could  bear  any  dcfertion  or  fpiritual  ccn- 
 (litfls,  if  I  could  but  have  my  heart  all  the  Vvhile  hurnirig 
 ivithin  me  with  love  to  God  and  defires  of  his  glory  :  but 
 this  is  impoH-.ble;  for  when  I  feel  thefe,  I  cannot  be  dcjefted 
 in  my  foul,  but  only  rejoice  m  ?vy  Sciviot:r,  who  has  deliver- 
 ed me  from  the  reigning  power,  and  will  fhortly  deliver  me 
 from  the  indv/eliing  of  fn. 
 
 Saturday,  May  1.  Was  enabled  to  cry  to  God  Vvlth  fervency 
 for  minifterial  qualifications,  and  that  God  would  appear  for 
 the  advancement  of  his  own  kingdom,  and  that  he  would 
 bring  in  tlie  Heathen  world,  <ic.     Had  much  alilftance  in  my 
 
 ftudies. This  has  been  a  profitable  week   to  me;  I  have 
 
 enjoyed  many  communications  of  the  blelFed  Spirit  in  mv 
 foul. 
 
 Lord's  day,  May  1.  God  v/as  plenfcd  this  morning  to  give 
 mc  fuch  a  light  of  m.yfelF,  as  made  me  appear  very  vile  in 
 my  own  eyes :  I  felt  corruption  ftirring  in  my  heart,  which 
 I  could  by  no  means  fupprcfs :  felt  more  and  miorc  defertcd; 
 yas  exceeding  v,cak,  and  nlm^oll:  fick  with  my  inward  trials. 
 
 Tvlonday, 
 
3©  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  J.  D.  1747. 
 
 Monday,  May  3.  Had  a  fcnfe  of  vile  ingratitude.  In  the 
 morning  1  withdrew  to  my  ulual  place  ct  retirement,  and 
 mourned  tor  my  abufe  of  my  dear  Lord :  fpcnt  the  day  in 
 fafting  and  prayer  :  God  gave  me  much  power  of  wreitling 
 for  his  caule  and  kingdom :  and  it  was  a  happy  day  to  my 
 foul.  God  was  with  me  all  the  day,  and  I  was  more  above 
 ihe  world,  than  ever  in  my  life. 
 
 [Through  the  remaining  part  of  this  week,  he  complains 
 almoft  every  day  of  defertion,  and  inward  trials  and  conflifts, 
 attended  with  dejeftion  of  fpirit  ;  but  yet  fpeaks  of  times  of 
 relief  and  fweetnefs,  and  daily  refrefhing  vifits  of  the  divine 
 Spirit,  affording  fpecial  afTiftance  and  comfort,  and  enabling, 
 at  fome  times,  to  much  fervency  and. enlargement  in  religious 
 duties.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  May  9.  I  think  I  ncxtx  felt  fo  much  of  the 
 curfed  pride  of  my  heart,  as  well  as  the  flubbornnefs  of  my 
 ■will  before.  Oh  dreadful!  what  a  vile  wretch  I  am!  I 
 could  not  fiibmit  to  be  nothing,  and  to  lie  down  in  the  dufl^ 
 Oh  that  God  would  humble  me  in  the  dufl !  I  felt  myiclf  luch 
 a  finner,  all  day,  that  I  had  fcarce  any  comfort.  Oh  when 
 iliall  I  be  "delivered  from  the  body  of  this  death !"  I  greatly 
 feared,  lefb  through  ilupidity  and  carelelTnefs  I  fhouid  lofc 
 the  benefit  of  thefe  trials.  O  that  they  might  be  fanfcificd  to 
 my  foul !     Nothing  feemcd  to  touch  ine  but  only  this,  that  I 
 
 Was  a  fmner. Had   fervency  and  refiefhmcnt  in    focial 
 
 prayer  in  the  evening. 
 
 Monday,  May  10.  Rode  to  New-Haven;  faw  fome  Chri- 
 flian  friends  there  ;  had  comfort  iii  joining  in  prayer  with 
 them,  and  hearing  of  die  goodnefs  of  God  to  them  fmce  I 
 lafl  faw  them. 
 
 Tuefday,  May  ii.  Rode  from  New- Haven  to  Weathcrf- 
 field;  was  very  dull  mofl  of  the  day,  had  little  fpirituality  in 
 this  journey,  though  I  often  longed  to  be  alone  with  God; 
 ^vas  much  perplexed  with  vile  thoughts;  was  fometimes  afraid 
 of  every  thing  :  but  God  was  7ny  helper.— Ci^xcht^  a  little  time 
 for  retirement  in  the  evening,  to  my  comfort  and  rejeicing. 
 Alas !  I  cannot  live  in  the  midil  of  a  tumult-  I  long  to  en- 
 joy God  alone. 
 
 Wedneiday,  May  12.  Had  a  diftrefiing  view  of  the  pride, 
 snd  enmity,  and  vjlenels  of  my  heart.- -Afterwards  had  Tweet 
 refrcfhment  in  converfmg,  and  worfhipping  God,  with  Chri- 
 ftian  friends. 
 
 Thurfday,  May  13.  Saw  fo  much  of  the  wickednefs  of  my 
 
 heart, 
 
£t.tS'       Mr    DAVID    B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  .^t 
 
 heart,  that  I  longed  to  get  away  from  myfelf.  I  never  be- 
 fore thought  there  was  To  much  fpiritual  pride  in  my  foul : 
 I  felt  ainioft  prefled  to  death  with  my  own  vilenefs.  Oh  what 
 a  body  of  death  is  there  in  me!  Lord,  deliver  my  foul.  I 
 could  not  find  any  convenient  place  for  retirement,  and  was 
 
 greatly  exercifed. Rode   to   Hartford  in  the   afternoon : 
 
 had  fome  refreihment  and  comfort  in  religious  exercifes  with 
 Chriflian  friends;  but  longed  for  more  retiremi;nt.  O  the 
 clofefl:  walk  with  God  is  the  fweetell  heaven  that  can  be  en- 
 joyed on  earth ! 
 
 Friday,  May  14.  Waited  on  a  council  of  minlfters  conve- 
 ned at  Hartford,  and  fpread  before  them  the  treatment  I  had 
 met  with  from  the  rc6t  jr  and  tutors  of  Yale  College  ;  who- 
 thought  it  advifeable  to  intercede  for  mc  with  the  reftor  and 
 truftees,  and  to  intreat  them  to  reftore  me  to  my  former  pri- 
 vileges in  college  *. After  this,  fpent  fomc   time  in  reli* 
 
 gious  exercifes  with  Chriftian  friends. 
 
 Saturday,  May  15.  Rode  from  Hartford  to  Kebron  ;  was 
 fomething  dejefted  on  the  road  ;  appeared  exceeding  vile  in 
 my  own  eyes,  faw  much  pride  and  (lubbornnefs  in  my  heart. 
 Indeed  I  never  faw  fuch  a  week  before,  as  this  ;  for  I  have 
 Been  almoft  ready  to  die  with  the  view  of  the  wickedncfs  of 
 mv  heart.  I  could  not  have  thought  I  had  fuch  a  body  of 
 death  in  me.     Oh  that  God  would  deliver  my  foul ! 
 
 [The  three  next  days  (which  he  fpent  at  Hebron,  Leba- 
 non, and  Norwich)  he  complains  ftili  of  dulnefs  and  defer- 
 tion,  and  expreffes  a  fenfe  of  his  vilenefs,  and  longing  to 
 hide  himfelf  in  fome  cave  or  den  of  the  earth  :  but  yec 
 fpeaks  of  fome  intervals  of  comfort  and  foul-re frefhment  each 
 day.] 
 
 Wednefday,  May  19.  [At  Miilington]  I  was  fo  amazingly 
 defcrted  this  morning,  that  I  feemed  to  feel  a  fort  of  horror 
 in  my  foul.  Alas !  when  God  withdraws,  what  is  therd-that 
 can  afford  any  comfort  to  the  foul ! 
 
 [Through  the  eight  days  next  following,  he  expreffes  more 
 ealmnefs  and  comfort,  and  confiderable  life,  fervency,  and 
 fweetncfs  in  religion.] 
 
 Friday,  May  28.  [At  NewvHavcn]  I  think  I  fcarce  ever 
 
 *  The  application  which  was  then  made  on  his  behalf,  had  not 
 the  defired  fuccefs, 
 
 felt 
 
■yz  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F  ^.  D.- 174^, 
 
 felt  C)  calrrx  in  my  life ;  I  rejoiced  in  rcfignation,  and  giving 
 jnyfelf  up  to  God,  to  be  wholly  and  entirely  dcvjted  to  hina. 
 for  ever. 
 
 [On  the  three  fjllowing  days,  there  was,  by  the  account 
 he  gives,  a  continuance  of  the  fame  excellent  frame  of  mind, 
 lall:  expreffed;  bat  it  fecms  net  to  be  altogether  to  fo  great  a 
 degree.] 
 
 Tucfday,  June  i.  Had  much  of  the  prefence  of  God  iw 
 family-prayer,  and  had  fonie  comfort  in  fecret.  I  was  great- 
 ly rcfrellied  from  the  word  of  God  this  morning,  which  ap- 
 peared exceeding  fweet  to  me ;  fome  things  that  appeared  my- 
 fterious  were  opened  to  me.  O  that  the  kingdom  of  the  dear 
 Saviour  might  come  with  power,  and  the  healing  waters  of 
 the  fanftuary  fpread  far  and  wide  for  the  healing  of  the_  na- 
 tions ! Came  to  Ripton  ;  but  was  very  weak.     However, 
 
 being  viflted  by  a  nuiiiber  of  young  people  in  the  evening,  I 
 prayed  with  them- 
 
 [The  remaining  part  of  this  week,  he  fpeaks  of  being  much 
 diverted  and  hindered  in  the  bufinefs  of  religion,  by  great 
 weaknefs  of  body,  and  necefTary  affairs,  that  he  had  to  attend, 
 and  complains  of  having  but  little  power  in  religion ;  but  fig- 
 -nifies,  that  God  hereby  fhewed  him,  he  was  like  a  hclplefs  in- 
 fant call  out  in  the  open  field.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  June  6.  I  feel  much  deferted ;  but  all  this 
 teaches  me  my  nothingnefs  and  vilcnefs  more  than  ever- 
 
 Monday,  June  7.  Felt  flill  powerlefs  in  lecret  prayer.  Af- 
 terwards I  prayed  and  converfed  with  fome  little  life.  God 
 feeds  me  with  crumbs  :  bleffed  be  his  nanie  for  any  thing.  I 
 felt  a  great  defire,  that  all  God's  people  might  know  how 
 mean  and  little  and  vile  I  am  ;  that  they  might  fee  I  am  no- 
 thing, that  fo  they  may  pray  for  me  aright,  and  not  have  the 
 lead  dependance  upon  me. 
 
 Tuefday,  June  8.  I  enjoyed  one  fweet  and  precious  feafon 
 this  day  :  I  never  felt  it  fo  fweet  to  be  nothing,  and  lefs  thaji 
 aothing,  and  to  be  accounted  nothing. 
 
 [The  three  next  days  he  complains  of  defertlon,  and  v;ant 
 ©f  fervency  in  religion ;  but  yet  his  diary  fhews  that  every 
 day  his  heart  was  engaged  in  religion,  as  hi 0  great,  and,  as  it 
 vi'ere,  only  bufuicls.] 
 
 Saturdaj^ 
 
Jfd.iS'        ^^     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  33 
 
 Saturday,  June  12.  Spent  much  time  in  prayer  this  morn- 
 inor,  and  enjoyed  much  Tweetnefs ; Felt  iniatiable  long- 
 ings after  God  much  of  the  day  :  I  wondered  how  poor  Luis 
 do  to  live,  that  have  no  Cod.- The  world,  with  all  its  en- 
 joyments, quite  vanifhed.  I  fee  myfelf  very  htlplcls :  but  I 
 have  a  bleffed  God  to  go  to.  I  longed  exceedingly  "  to  be 
 "  difTilved,  and  to  be  with  Chriil,  to  behold  his  glory."  Oh, 
 my  weak  weary  foul  longs  to  arrive  at  lyiy  Father'' s  houje  J 
 
 Lord's  day,  fune  13.  Felt  fomething  calm  and  refigned  in 
 the  public  worlhip:  at  the  facrament  law  myfelf  very  vile  and 
 worthlefs.  O  that  I  may  always  lie  low  in  the  dull.  My 
 foul  feemed  Iteadily  to  go  forth  after  God,  in  longing  d(?fires 
 to  live  upon  him. 
 
 Monday,  June  14.  Felt  fomething  of  the  fweetnefs  of  com- 
 munion with  God,  and  the  confiraining  force  of  h'/s  love: 
 how  admirably  it  captivates  the  foul,  and  makes   all  the  de- 
 
 ilres  and  atfe<ftions  to  center  in  God ! 1  ict  apart  this  day 
 
 for  fecret  fading  and  prayer,  to  intreat  God  to  dii  edl  and  biefs 
 me  with  regard  to  the  great  v»'ork  I  have  in  view,  ot  preach- 
 ing the  gofpel;  and  that  the  Lord  would  return  to  me,  and 
 '*  /hew  me  the  light  of  his  countenance."  Had  Lttle  life  and 
 power  in  the  forenoon :  near  the  middle  of  the  afternoon, 
 God  enabled  me  to  v/reflle  ardently  in  interceflion  for  abfent 
 friends: — but  juft  at  night,  the  Lord  vifited  me  marvellouliy 
 in  prayer ;  I  think  my  foul  never  was  in  fuch  an  agony  be- 
 fore :  I  felt  no  reflraint ;  for  the  treafurcs  of  divine  grace 
 were  opened  to  me  :  I  wreftled  for  abfent  friends,  for  the  in- 
 gathering of  fouls,  for  multitudes  of  poor  fouls,  and  for  many 
 that  I  thought  were  the  children  of  God,  perfonally,  in  many 
 diftant  places.  I  was  in  fuch  an  agony,  from  fun  half  an 
 hour  high,  till  near  dark,  that  I  was  all  over  wet  with  fweat ; 
 but  yet  it  feemed  to  me  that  I  had  walled  away  the  day,  and 
 had  done  nothing.     Oh,  my  dear  Jefus  did  Jhveat  blood  for 
 
 poor  fouls!   I  longed  for  more  corapaflion  towards  them. 
 
 Felt  flill  in  a  fwect  frame,  under  a  fcnfe  of  divine  love  and 
 grace ;  and  went  to  bed  in  fuch  a  frame,  with  my  heart  fet 
 on  God. 
 
 Tuefday,  June  15.  Had  the  moA  ardent  longings  after 
 God,  that  ever  I  felt  in  my  life :  at  neon,  in  my  fecret  re- 
 tirement, I  could  do  nothing  but  tell  my  dear  Lord,  in  a 
 fweet  calm,  that  he  knev/  1  longed  for  nothirg  bi.t  hlr,ifi'lj\ 
 nothing  but  h'Alnefi  ;  that  he  had  given  me  thefe  dclires,  and 
 he  only  could  give  me  the  thing  defired.  I  never  feemed  to 
 fee  fo  unhinged  from  myfelf,  and  to  be  fo  wholly  devoted  to 
 God.     My  heart  was  fwalbwed  up  in  God  m.cft  of  the  day. 
 
 E  In 
 
34  T  H  E     L  I  I^  E     O  r  A.  D.  17421 
 
 In  the  evening  I  had  fuch  a  view  of  the  foul's  being  as  it  were 
 enlarged,  to  contain  more  holinefs,  that  my  foul  feemcd 
 ready  to  feparate  from  my  body,  and  flretch  to  obtain  it.  I 
 then  wreftled  in  an  agony  for  divine  bleffings ;  had  my  heart 
 drawn  out  in  prayer  for  fome  ChrilHan  friends,  beyond  what 
 
 I  ever  had  before. 1  feel  differently  now  from  what  ever  I 
 
 did  under  any  fweet  enjoyments  before,  more  engaged  to  live 
 to  God  for  ever,  and  lefs  pleafed  with  my  own  frames :  I  am 
 not  fatisfied  with  my  frames,  nor  feel  at  all  more  cafy  after 
 fuch  fwect  ftrugglings  than  before;  for  it  fecms  far  too  little, 
 if  I  could  always  be  fo.  Oh  how  Ihort  do  I  fall  of  my  duty 
 in  my  fweeteft  moments! 
 
 [In  his  diary  for  the  two  next  days,  he  exprefles  fomething 
 of  the  fame  frame,  bur  in  a  far  lefs  degree  *.] 
 
 Friday,  June  18,  Confidering  my  great  unfitnefs  for  the 
 work  of  the  vi'mijiry,  my  prefent  dcadnefs,  and  total  inability 
 to  do  any  thing  for  the  glory  of  God  that  way,  feeling  my- 
 felf  very  helpleis,  and  at  a  great  lofs  "  what  the  Lord  would 
 "  have  me  to  do  ;"  I  fet  apart  this  day  for  prayer  to  God,  and 
 fpent  moil:  of  the  day  in  that  duty,  but  amazingly  deferted 
 mofl  of  the  day  :  yet  I  found  God  graciouily  near  ;  once  in 
 particular,  while  I  was  pleading  for  more  compalfion  for 
 immortal  fouls,  my  heart  feemed  to  be  opened  at  once,  and 
 I  was  enabled  to  cry  with   great   ardency,  for  a  few  minutes. 
 
 Oh,  I  was  difirelTed,  to  think,  that  I  fliould  offer  fuch 
 dead  cold  fervices  to  the  living  God!  My  foul  fecmicd  to 
 breathe  after  holinefs,  a  life  of  conflant  devotednefs  to  God. 
 But  I  am  almoff  loft  fomctimes  in  the  purfuit  of  this  bleffed- 
 nels,  and  ready  to  fink,  becaufe  I  continually  fall  fhort  and 
 mifs  of  my  delire.  O  that  the  Lord  would  help  me  to  hold 
 out,  yet  a  little  v/hile,  till  the  happy  hour  of  deliverance  comes! 
 
 Saturday,  June  19.  Felt  much  cifordcred;  my  fpirits  were 
 very  low  :  but  yet  enjoyed  fome  freedom  and  fweetnefs  in  the 
 duties  of  religion.     Blclfed  be  God. 
 
 Lord's  day,  June  20.  Spent  much  time  alone.  My  foul 
 longed  to  be  holy,  and  reached  after  God;  but  feemed  not  to 
 obtain  my  delire  :  I  hungered  Sixid!  thlrjled ;  but  was  not  fwect- 
 
 *  Here  end  the  30  firft  pages  of  the  third  volume  of  his  diary, 
 which  he  fpeaks  of  in  the  beginning  of  this  volume,  (as  was  obferved 
 before),  as  containing  a  fpecimcn  of  his  ordinary  manner  of  living, 
 through  the  whole  fpacc  of  time,  from  the  beginning  of  thofe  two 
 volumes  that  were  deftroyed. 
 
 I 
 
Mt.is-         Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  35 
 
 ly  refreflied  and  fatisfied.  My  foul  hung  on  God,  as  my  on- 
 ly portion.  O  that  I  could  grow  in  grace  more  abundantly 
 every  day .' 
 
 [The  next  day  he  fpeaks  of  his  having  alTiflance  in  his  flu- 
 dies,  and  power,  fervency,  and  comfort  in  prayer.] 
 
 Tucfday,  June  22.  In  the  morning,  fpent  about  two  hours 
 in  prayer  and  meditation,  with  confiderable  delight.  Towards 
 night,  felt  my  foul  go  out  in  longing  defir-^s  after  God,  in  fe- 
 cret  retirement.  In  the  evening,  was  fweetly  compofed  and 
 refigned  to  God's  will  ;  was  enabled  to  leave  myfelf  and  all 
 my  concerns  with  him,  and  to  have  my  whole  dependancc 
 upon  him :  my  fecret  retirement  was  very  refrefhing  to  my 
 foul ;  it  appeared  fuch  a  happinefs  to  have  God  for  my  por- 
 tion, that  I  had  rather  be  any  other  creature  in  this  lov-'er 
 creation,  than  not  come  to  the  enjoyment  of  God :  I  had 
 rather  be  a  beafl:,  than  a  man,  without  God,  if  I  were  to  live 
 hereto  eternity.     Lord,  endear  thy  felf  more  to  me! 
 
 [In  his  diary  for  the  next  feven  days,  he  exprelTes  a  variety 
 of  exercifes  of  mind :  he  fpeaks  of  great  longings  after 
 God  and  holinefs,  and  earnefl  defires  for  the  converfion  of 
 others,  of  fervency  in  prayer,  and  power  to  v/reftle  with 
 God,  and  of  compofure,  comfort,  and  fweetnefs,  from  time 
 to  time;  but  expreffes  a  fenfe  of  the  vile  abomination  of  his 
 heart,  and  bitterly  complains  of  his  barrennefs,  and  the  prefT- 
 ing  body  of  death ;  and  fays,  he  "  faw  clearly,  that  what- 
 *'  ever  he  enjoyed,  better  than  hell,  was  free  grace."  Com- 
 plains of  his  being  exceeding  low,  much  below  the  charafter 
 of  a  child  of  God ;  and  is  fometimes  very  difconfolate  and 
 dejcfted.] 
 
 Wednefday,  June  30.  Spent  this  day  alone  in  the  woods, 
 In  failing  and  prayer;  underwent  t;he  mofl  drear'ful  confli<5ls 
 in  my  foul,  that  ever  I  felt,  in  fome  refpefts  :  I  faw  myfelf 
 fo  vile,  that  I  was  rendy  to  fay,  "  I  fhail  now  perilh  by  the 
 "  hand  of  Saul."  I  thought,  and  almoft  concluded,  I  had  no 
 power  to  (land  for  the  caufe  of  God,  but  was  almofl  "afraid 
 "  of  the  fliaking  of  a  leaf."  Spent  aimoft  the  whole  day  in 
 prayer,  incelTantly.  I  could  not  bear  to  think  of  ChriHians 
 (hewing  me  any  refpeft.  I  aimoft  defpaired  of  doing  any 
 fervice  in  the  world :  I  could  not  feci  any  hope  or  comfort 
 rcfpefting  the  Heathen,  which  ufed  to  afford  me  fome  re- 
 frcfhmcnt  in  the  darkeft  hours  of  this  nature.     I  fpent  away 
 
 E  2  the 
 
^6  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  ^.  Z>.  1742, 
 
 the  day  ;;t  the  bHtfrnefs  of  my  foul.  Near  night,  I  felt  a 
 little  better;  and  altcrwards  enjuyed  fome  fweetnefs  in  fecret 
 prayer. 
 
 Tliurfday,  July  i.  Had  fome  fweetnefs  in  prayer  this 
 morning.— Felt  exceeding  fwcetly  in  fecret  prayer  to-night, 
 and  dcfircd  nothing  fo  ardently  as  that  God  Jhould  do  ivith  m€ 
 jufi  as  he  pkcftd. 
 
 Friday,    July   2.    Felt  compofed   In   fecret   prayer  in  the 
 
 mjrning. My   defires   fweetly   afcended  to  God  this  day, 
 
 as  I  was  travelling  :  and  was  comfortable  in  the  evening. 
 Blcffjd  be  Gjd  for  all  my  confolations. 
 
 Saturday,  July  3.  My  heart  feemed  again  to  fijik.  The 
 difgrace  I  was  laid  under  at  college,  feemed  to  damp  me,  as 
 it  opens  the  mouths  of  oppofers.  I  had  no  refuge  but  in  God 
 only.  Bleffed  be  his  name,  that  I  may  go  to  him  at  all  times, 
 anci  find  hmi  z  prcfent  help. 
 
 Lord's  djy,  July  4.  Had  confiderable  afliflance.  In  the 
 evening  I  withdrew,  and  enjoyed  a  happy  feafon  in  fecret 
 prayer :  God  was  pleafed  to  give  me  the  exercife  of  faith, 
 and  thereby  brought  the  invifible  and  eternal  world  near  to 
 my  foul;  which  appeared  Iweetly  to  me.  1  hoped,  that  my 
 weary  pilgr'maFe  in  the  v>'orld  M'ould'*be  yZ?orf ;  and  that  it 
 v/ould  nv)t  be  long  before  I  v\'as  brought  to  my  heavenly  home 
 and  Father's  houfe :  I  was  fweetiy  refigned  to  God's  will, 
 to  tarry  his  time,  to  do  his  work,  and  fuffer  his  pleafure. 
 I  felt  thankfulnefs  to  God  for  all  my  preffing  defertiuns  of 
 Inte  ;  for  I  am  perfuadcd  they  have  been  made  a  means  of 
 making  me  more  humble,  and  much  more  refgned.  I  felt 
 pleafed,  to  be  little,  to  be  nothing,  and  to  lie  in  the  dujl.  I 
 enioyed  life  and  fweet  confolation  in  pleading  for  the  dear 
 children  of  God,  and  the  kingdom  of  Chrifl  in  the  world : 
 and  m.y  fDui  earneflly  breathed  after  holinefs,  and  the  enjoy- 
 ment of  God.  "  O  come.  Lord  Jefus !  come  quickly.  Amen." 
 
 [  By  his  diary  for  the  remr.ining  days  of  this  week,  it  ap- 
 pears that  he  enjoyed  confiderable  compofure  and  tranquillity, 
 and  had  fweetnefs  and  fervency  of  fpirit  in  prayer,  from  day 
 to  day.] 
 
 Lords  day,  July  11.  Was  deferted  and  exceeding  dejeflcd 
 in  the  morning.  In  the  afternoon,  had  fome  life  and  aflift- 
 ancc,  and  felt  rcugned;  I  faw  myfelf  exceeciijRg  vile. 
 
 rOn  the  two  next  days  he  cxprefTes  inward  comfort,  ren§- 
 •''.cion,  aud  fcrength  in  God.;] 
 
 '  Wednefda^;, 
 
JEt.iS'      Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  57 
 
 Wednefday,  July  14.  Felt  a  kind  of  humble  refigned  fweet^ 
 nels:  fpent  a  confiderable  time  in  fecret,  giving  my felf  up 
 wholly  to  the  Lord.—Heard  Mr  Bellansy  preach  towards 
 night :  felt  very  Iweetly  part  of  the  time  :  longed  for  nearer 
 accefs  to  God. 
 
 [The  four  next  days,  he  exprefTes  confiderable  comfort 
 and  fervency  of  Ipirit  in  Chriftian  converlation  and  religious 
 pxercifes.] 
 
 Monday,  July  19.  My  defires  feem  efpeclally  to  be  carried 
 out  after  weanednefs  from  the  world,  perfect  deadnefs  to  it, 
 and  to  be  even  crucified  to  all  its  allurements.  My  foul  longs 
 to  feel  itfelf  more  of  a  pilgrim  and  firanger  here  below  ; 
 that  nothing  may  divert  me  from  preffing  through  the  lonely 
 defart,  till  I  arrive  at  my  Father's  houfe. 
 
 Tuefday,  July  20.  It  was  fweet,  to  give  away  myfelf  to 
 God,  to  be  difpoled  of  at  his  pleafure ;  and  had  fome  feei^ 
 ing  fenfe  of  the  fweetnefs  of  being  a  pilgrim  on  earth. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  exprefles  himfelf  as  determined  to  be 
 wholly  devoted  to  God  :  and  it  appears  by  his  diary,  that  he 
 fpent  the  whole  day  in  a  moft  diligent  exercife  of  religion, 
 and  exceeding  comfortably.] 
 
 Thurfday,  July  22.  Journeying  from  Southbury  to  Rip- 
 ton,  called  at  a  houfe  by  the  way,  v.here  being  very  kindly 
 entertained  and  refreshed,  I  was  filled  with  amazement  and 
 fliame,  that  God  fhould  flir  up  the  hearts  of  any  to  fhew  fo 
 much  kindnefs  to  fuch  a  dead  dog  as  I  ;  was  made  fenfiblc,  in 
 fome  meafure,  how  exceeding  vile  it  is,  not  to  be  wholly  de- 
 voted to  God.  I  wondered,  that  God  would  fuffer  any  of  his 
 creatures  to  feed  and  fuftain  me  from  time  to  time. 
 
 [In  his  diary  for  the  fix  next  days,  are  exprefi'ed  various 
 exercifes  and  experiences,  fuch  as,  fweet  compofure  and  fer- 
 vency of  fpirit  in  meditation  and  prayer,  weanednefs  from 
 the  world,  being  fcnfibly  a  pilgrim  and  ftranger  on  the  earth, 
 engagednefs  of  mind  to  fpend  every  inch  of  time  for  God,  dr.] 
 
 Thurfday,  July  29.  "Was  examined  by  the  Aflbciation  met 
 at  Danbui-y,  as  to  my  learning,  and  alfo  my  experiences  in 
 rcligio;^,  and  received  a  licence  from  them  to  preach  the  go- 
 ip"l  ot  Chrift.  Afterwards  felt  much  devoted  to  God;  join- 
 ed in  prayer  with  one  of  the  minifters,  my  peculiar  friend,  in 
 a^convenient  pl;^ce  ;  v,  c|it  to  bed  refolving  to  live  devoted  t  j 
 iJc*d  ail  my  days. 
 
 PARI' 
 
PART       III. 
 
 From  the  time  of  his  being  liccnfed  to  preach, 
 by  the  yljfociation,  till  he  was  examined  in 
 New-York,  by  the  Correfpondents  or  commijP- 
 fioners  of  the  Society  in  Scotland  for  propaga- 
 ting Cliriflian  knowledge,  and  approved  and 
 appointed  as  their  Mijjionary  to  the  Indians. 
 
 FRiday,  July  30.  1742.  Rode  from  Danbury  to  Southbu- 
 bury  ;  preached  there  from  i  Pet.  iv.  8.  Had  much  of 
 the  comfortable  prefence  of  God  in  the  exercife:  I  feemed  to 
 have  power  with  God  in  prayer,  and  power  to  get  hold  of 
 the  hearts  of  the  people  in  preaching. 
 
 Saturday,  July  31.  Exceeding  calm  and  compofed,  and 
 was  greatly  refreihed  and  encouraged. 
 
 [It  appears  by  his  diar}-^,  that  he  continued  in  this  fweet- 
 nefs  and  tranquillity^  almoft  through  the  whole  of  the  next 
 week.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  Auguft  8.  In  the  morning  felt  comfortably  in 
 fecret  prayer ;  my  foul  was  refrefhed  with  the  hopes  of  the 
 Heathen's  coming  home  to  Chrifl ;  was  much  refigned  to  God, 
 I  thought  it  was  no  matter  what  became  of  me. Preach- 
 ed both  parts  cf  the  day  at  Bethlehem,  from  Job  xiv.  14.  It 
 was  fwcet  to  me  to  meditate  on  death.  In  the  evening,  felt 
 very  comfortably,  and  cried  to  God  fervently,  in  fecret 
 prayer. 
 
 [It  appears  by  his  diary,  that  he  continued  through  the 
 three  next  days,  engaged  with  all  his  m.ight  in  the  bufmefs  of 
 religion,  and  in  aimolt  a  conftant  enjoyment  of  the  comforts 
 of  it.] 
 
 Thurfday,  Auguft  12.  This  morning  and  lafl  night  was 
 cxercifed  vith  fore  inward  trials:  1  had  no  power  to  pray; 
 
 bus 
 
^/.  25-      Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  1  N  E  R  D.  39 
 
 but  fcemcd  Ihut  out  from  God.  I  had  in  a  great  mcafure 
 loft  tiy  hopes  of  God's  Tending  me  among  the  Heathen  afar 
 oif,  and  of  feeing  them  flock  home  to  Chrift.  I  faw  fo 
 much  of  my  hellifli  vilenefs,  that  I  appeared  worfc  to  myCdf 
 thaa  any  devil  :  I  \rondered  that  God  would  let  me  live,  and 
 wondered  that  people  did  not  ftone  me,  much  more  that  they 
 would  ever  hear  me  preach  !  It  feemed  as  though  I  never 
 could  nor  £houli  preach  any  more;  yet  aivout  nine  or  tea 
 o'clock,  the  people  came  over,  and  I  \ras  forced  to  preach. 
 And  blefTei  be  God,  he  gave  me  his  prefence  and  Spirit  in 
 prayer  and  preaching  :  fo  that  I  was  much  aiLfted,  and  fpake 
 with  power  from  Job  xiv.  14.  Some  Indians  cried  out  m 
 great  diftrefs  *,  and  all  appeared  greatly  concerned.  After 
 we  had  prayed  and  exhorted  them  to  leek  the  Lord  with  cc:> 
 fl::nc^',  and  hired  an  Engii/h  woman  to  keep  a  kind  of  fchcti 
 among  them,  we  came  away  about  one  o'clock,  asid  came  to 
 Judea,  z\yout  fifteen  or  iixteen  miles.  There  God  was  plea- 
 fed  to  vilit  my  foul  with  much  comfort.  BlelTed  be  the  Lord 
 for  all  things  I  meet  with. 
 
 > 
 
 [It  appears,  that  the  two  next  days  he  bad  much  comfort, 
 and  had  his  heart  much  engaged  in  religion.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  Augiift  13.  Felt  much  comfort  and  deroted- 
 nefs  to  God  this  day.  At  nighty  it  was  refreLhing,  to  get  a- 
 lone  with  God,  zndpour  out  my  f'jul.  O  who  can  ccnceive 
 of  the  fweetnefs  of  commuaion  with  the  bleiled  God,  but 
 thofe  that  have  experience  of  it  I  Glory  to  God  for  ever, 
 that  I  may  taftc  heaven  b^elow. 
 
 Monday,  Auguft  16.     Had  fome  comfort  in  fecret  prayer, 
 
 in  the  morning. Felt  fweetiy  fundry  times  in  prayer  this 
 
 day :  but  was  much  perplexed  in  the  evening  with  vain  con- 
 Terfation. 
 
 Tuefday,  Auguft  17.  Exceedlnglv  depreiTed  in  fpirir,  it 
 cuts  and  wounds  my  heart,  to  think  how  much  elf-ex  ah atiaty 
 fplrltual  pride^  and  'jiizrmth  rfte-nrpcr,  I  have  fzrmeriy  had 
 intermingled  with  my  endeavours  to  promote  God's  work  : 
 and  fometimes  I  long  to  lie  down  at  the  fctt  of  oppofers,  and 
 confefs  what  a  poor  imperfect  creature  I  hare  been,  and  ftili 
 am.  Oh,  the  Lord  forgive  me,  and  make  me  for  the  futmrt 
 "  wife  as  a  ferpenr,  and  harmlefs  as  a  dove  P*— Afterwards  cz- 
 joyed  confiderable  comfort  and  delight  of  foul. 
 
 *  It  was  in  a  plice  near  Kent,  in  the  weTrem  borders  cf  Con- 
 ■edicat,  where  thsrc  is  a  cscibsr  of  Indiarj. 
 
 Weinefdav. 
 
4^  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  P  yf.  D,  1741. 
 
 Wednefday,  Auguft  1 8.  Spent  moft  of  this  day  in  prayer 
 and  reading.— I  fee  fo  much  ot  my  own  extreme  vilenefs,  that 
 I  feel  afhamcd  and  guilty  before  God  and  man  ;  I  look  to  my- 
 fclf  like  the  vilelHeliow  in  the  land:  I  wonder  that  God 
 flirs  up  his  people  to  be  fo  kind  to  me. 
 
 Thurfday,  Auguft  19.  This  day,  being  about  to  go  from 
 Mr  Bellamy's  at  Bethlehem,  where  I  had  i-efided  fome  time, 
 prayed  with  him,  and  two  or  three  other  Chriftian  friends, 
 and  gave  ourfelves  to  God  with  all  our  hearts,  to  be  his  for 
 ever  :  eternity  looked  very  near  to  mc,  while  I  was  praying. 
 If  I  never  fhould  fee  thefe  Chriftians  again  in  this  world,  it 
 feemed  but  a  few  moments  before  I  (hould  meet  them  in  an- 
 other world Parted  with  them  fweetly. 
 
 Friday,  Auguft  20.  I  appeared  fo  vile  to  myfelf,  that  I 
 hardly  dared  to  think  of  being  feen,  efpecially  on  account  of 
 fpiritual  pride.  However,  to-night  I  enjoyed  a  fweet  hour 
 alone  with  God,  (at  Ripton) :  I  was  lifted  above  the  frowns 
 and  flatteries  of  this  lower  world,  had  a  fweet  relifh  of  hea- 
 venly joys,  and  my  foul  did  as  it  were  get  into  the  eternal 
 world,  and  really  tafte  of  heaven.  I  had  a  fweet  feafcn 
 of  interceffun  for  dear  friends  in  Chrift  ;  and  God  helped 
 me  to  cry  fervently  for  Zion.  Blefled  be  God  for  this  fea- 
 fon. 
 
 Saturday,  Auguft  21.  Was  much  perplexed  in  the  morn- 
 ing.   Towards  noon  enjoyed  more  of  God  in  fecret,  was 
 
 enabled  to  fee  that  it  was  beft  to  throw  myfelf  into  the  hands 
 of  God,  to  be  difpofed  of  according  to  his  pleafure,  and  re- 
 joiced in  fuch  thoughts  In  the  afternoon,  rode  to  New- 
 Haven;  was  much   confufed  all  the  way. Juft  at  night, 
 
 underwent  fuch  a  dreadful  conflidl,  as  I  have  fcarce  ever  hit. 
 I  faw  myfelf  exceeding  vile  and  unworthy ;  fo  that  I  was 
 guilty,  and  afliamed,  that  any  body  ftiould  beftow  any  favour 
 on  me,  or  /hew  me  any  refpefl. 
 
 Lord's  day,  Auguft  22.  In  the  morning,  continued  ftill 
 in  perplexity  -—In  the  evening,  enjoyed  (hat  comfort  that 
 feemed  to  me  fufticient  to  overbalance  all  m.y  late  diftreftes  I 
 faw  that  God  is  the  only  foul-fatisfying  portion,  and  I  real- 
 ly found  fatisfa6\ion  in  him :  my  foul  was  much  enlarged  in 
 fweet  intercellion  for  my  fellow-men  every  where,  and  for 
 ir^any  Chriftian  friends,  in  particular,  in  diftant  places. 
 
 Monday,  Auguft  23.  Had  a  fweet  feafon  ia  fecret  prayer : 
 the  Lord  drew  near  to  my  foul,  and  filled  me  with  peace  and 
 divine  confolation.  O  my  foul  taftcd  the  fwectnefs  of  the 
 wpper  world  ;  and  was  fweetly  drawn  out  in  prayer  for  the 
 world,    that  it  might  come  home  Chrift !     Had  much  cora- 
 
 fori 
 
Mt.2S'  M  R    t)  A  V  I  D     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  41 
 
 fort  in  the  thoughts  and  hopes  of  the  Ingathering  of  the  Hea- 
 then ;  was  greatly  aflilted  in  interceiHon  for  Chrifiian  friends. 
 
 [He  continued  flill  In  the  fame  frame  of  mind  the  next 
 day,  but  in  a  leffer  degree.] 
 
 Wcdnefday,  Auguft  25.  Tn  family-prayer,  God  helped  me 
 to  climb  up  near  him,  fo  that  I  fcarce  ever  got  nearer. 
 
 [The  four  next  days,  he  appears  to  have  been  the  fubjeft 
 ofdefertion,  and  of  comfort  and  fervency  in  religion,  inter- 
 changeably, together  with  a  fenfe  of  viienefs  and  unproiitablc- 
 ncfs.] 
 
 Monday,  Augufl:  30.  Felt  fomcthing  comfortably  in  the 
 morning  ;  convcrfed  fweetly  with  fome  friends  ;.  was  in  a  fe- 
 rious  compofed  frame;  prayed  at  a  certain  houfe  with  fome 
 degree  of  fweetnefs.  Afterwards,  at  another  houle,  prayed 
 privately  with  a  dear  Chrifiian  friend  or  two ;  and,  I  think, 
 I  fcarce  ever  launched  fo  far  into  the  eternal  world,  as  then  ; 
 I  got  fo  far  out  on  the  broad  ocean,  that  my  foul  with  joy 
 triumphed  over  all  the  evils  on  the  fliores  of  mortality.  I 
 think,  time,  and  all  its  gay  amufements  and  cruel  difappcint- 
 mcnts,  never  appeared  fo  inconfiderablc  to  me  before  :  I  was 
 in  a  fweet  frame  ;  I  faw  myfelf  nothing,  and  my  foul  reach- 
 ed after  God  with  intcnfe  defire.  O  !  I  faw  what  I  owed  to 
 God,  in  fuch  a  manner,  as  I  fcarce  ever  did:  I  knew,  1  had 
 never  lived  a  moment  to  him,  as  I  fhould  do  ;  indeed  it  ap- 
 peared to  m.e,  I  bad  never  done   any   thing   in    Chriftlanity : 
 
 my  foul  longed  with  a  vehement  delirc  to  iJve  to  God. in 
 
 the  evening,  fung  and  prayed  with  a  number  of  Chriftians : 
 felt  "  the  powers  of  the  world  to  come"  in  my  foul,  in. 
 prayer.  Afterwards  prayed  again  privately,  with  a  dear 
 Chrifiian  or  two,  and  found  the  prcfence  of  God  ;  was  fome- 
 thing  humbled  in  my  fecret  retirement ;  felt  my  ingratitude^ 
 bccaufe  I  was  not  wholly  fv/allowed  up  in  God. 
 
 [He  was  in  a  fweet  frame  great  part  of  the  next  day.] 
 
 •  Wednefday,  September  i.  Went  to  Judea,  to  the  ordina- 
 tion of  Mr  Judd.  Dear  Mr  Bellamy  preached  frorn  Matth. 
 xxiv.  46.  "  BlcfTed  is  that  fervant,"  cc.  I  felt  very  folemn, 
 and  very  fweetly,  mod  of  the  time ;  had  my  thoughts  much 
 on  that  time  when  our  Lord  luill  coiyie  ;  that  time  refrelhed 
 my  foul  much;  only   I   was   afraid,    I   faould  not  be  found 
 
 F  fc:thf::l, 
 
42  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  A.D.  1741, 
 
 fc'.!thfi{K  becaufc  I  havc.fo  vile  a  heart.  My  thoughts  were 
 much  in  eternity,  where  I  love  to  dwell.    Blcfled  be  God  for 
 
 this  folemn  feaion. Rode  home  to-night  with  Mr  Bellamy^ 
 
 felt  {bmcthing  fweetly  on  the  road ;  convcrfed  with  fome 
 friends  till  it  was  very  late,,  and  then  retired  to  reft  in  a  con> 
 fortable  frame. 
 
 Thurfday,  September  2.  About  two  in  the  afternoon,  I 
 preached  from  John  vi.  6j.  and  God  affifted  me  in  fome  com- 
 fortable degree  ;  but  m-ore  efpecially  in  my  firft  prayer;  my 
 foul  fcemcd  then  to  launch  quite  into  the  eternal  world,  and 
 
 to  be  as  it  were  feparated  from   this  lower  world. After- 
 
 v/ards  preached  again  from  If.  v.  4.  God  gave  mc  fome 
 ailiftance  ;  but  I  faw  myfelf  a  poor  worm- 
 
 [On  Friday,  September  3.  He  complains  of  having  but 
 little  life  in  the  things  of  God,  the  former  part  of  the  day, 
 but  afterwards*  fpeaks  of  fweetnefs  and  enlargement.] 
 
 Saturday,  September  4.  Much  out  of  health,  and  exceed- 
 ingly dcprelfed  in  my  foul,  and  was  at  an  awful  diftance  from 
 
 God. Tov/ards   night,    fpent    fome    time    in    profitable 
 
 thoughts  on  Rom.  viii.  2. Near  night,  had  a  very  fwcct 
 
 feafon  in  prayer  ;  God  enabled  me  to  virefde  ardently  for  the 
 advancement  of  the  Redeemer's  kingdom  ;  pleaded  earneftly 
 for  my  own  dear  brother  John,  that  God  would  make  him 
 more  of  a  pilgrim  and  ftranger  on  the  earth,  and  fit  him  for 
 fmgular  fcrviceablenefs  in  the  world ;  and  my  heart  fweetly 
 exulted  in  the  Lord,  in  the  thoughts  of  any  diftrelTes  that 
 might  alight-on  him  or  me,   in   the  advancement   of  Chrift's 
 
 kingdom. It  was  a  fweet  and  comfortable  hour  unto  my 
 
 foul,  while  I  was  indulged  freedom  to  plead,  not  only  for 
 myfelf,  but  for  many  other  fouls. 
 
 Lord's  day,  September  5.    Freaehcd   all  day:    was   fome- 
 '  thing'ftrengthened  and  affifted  in  the  afternoon ;  more  efpecial- 
 ly in  the  evening:  had  a'fenfc  of  my  unfpeakable  fliortcomings 
 in  air  my  duties.     I   found,    alas  i    that  I  had  never  lived  to 
 God  in  my  life. 
 
 Monday,  Scptc;iibcr  6.  Vv'as  informed,  that  they  only 
 waited  for  an  opportunity  to  apprehend  me  for  preaching  at 
 New-Haven  lately,  that  fo  they  might  imprilbn  me.  T'his 
 made  me  more  folemn  and  ferious,  and  to  quit  all  hqpcs  of 
 the  v/orkrf>  friendfliip :  it  brought  mc  to  a  further  fen fe  of 
 my  vilenehi,  and  juft  defert  of  this,  and  much  mqre,  from 
 the  hand  of  God,  though  not  from  fJie  hand  of  man-  Reti- 
 ■  ■  *     '  red 
 
Mt.1^.         M  R  .  D  A  V  I  D     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D. '         43 
 
 fed  into  a  convenient  place  in  the  woods,  and  fpread  the  mat- 
 ter before  God. 
 
 Tuelday,  September  7.  Had  fomc  rellfn  of  divine  things 
 in  the  morning.  Afterwards  felt  more  barren  and  melancho- 
 ly. Rode  to  New-Haven/  to  a  friend's  houfe  at  a  dillance 
 from  the  town ;  that  I  remain  undifcovered,  and  yet  have 
 opportunity  to  do  bufinefs  privately  with  friends  v^iich  come 
 10  Commencement. 
 
 Wednefday,  September  8.  Felt  very  fwcetly,  when  I  firft 
 rofc  in  the  morning.  In  family-prayer,  bad  fome"  enlarge- 
 ment, but  not  much  fpirituality,  till  eternity  came  up  bcl-ors 
 me,  and  looked  near ;  I  found  ibme  fweetnefs  in  the  thoughts 
 ©f  bidding  a  dying  farewell  to  this  tireforae  world.  Though 
 fome  time  ago  I  reckoned  upon  feeing  my  dear  friends  at 
 Commencement;  yet  being  now  denied  the  opportunity,  for 
 fear  of  iinprilonment,  1  felt  totally  refigned,  and  as  content- 
 ed to  fpend  this  day  alone  in  the  woods,  as  I  could  have  done, 
 if  I  had  been  allowed  to  go  to  town.  Felt  exceedingly  wean- 
 ed from  the  world  to-day. In  the  afternoon   dilcourfed 
 
 fomething  on  fome  divine  things  with  a  dear  Chriftian  friend, 
 whereby  we  were  both  refrefhed.  Then  I  prayed,  with  a 
 fweet  fenfe  of  the  blelTednefs  of  communion  with  God  :  I 
 think  I  fcarce  ever  enjoyed  more  of  God  in  any  one  prayer. 
 O  it  was  a  bleffcd  feafon  indeed  to  my  foul  I  I  knew  not  that 
 ever  I  faw  fo  much  of  my  own  nothingnefs  in  my  life  ;  never 
 wondered  fo,  that  God  allowed  me  to  preach  his  word  ;  never 
 was  fo  aftonifhed  as  nov/.' This  has  been  a  fweet  and  com- 
 fortable day  to  my  foul.     Bleffed  be  God. Prayed  again 
 
 with  my  dear  friend,  with  fomething  of  the  divine  prefence. 
 1  long  to  be  wholly  conformed  to  God,  and  transform- 
 ed  into  his  image. 
 
 Thurfday,  September  9.  Spent  m.uch  of  the  day  alone: 
 Tijoycd  the  prefence  of  God  in  fome  comfortable  degree  : 
 was  vifited  by  fome  dear  friends,  and  prayed  with  them  : 
 wrote  fundry  letters  to  friends ;  felt  religion  in  my  foul  while 
 \Vriting :  enjoyed  fome  fweet  meditations  on  fome  fcriptures. 
 — In  the  evening,  went  very  privately  into  town,  from  the 
 place  of  my  refidence  at  the  farms,  and  converfed  with  fome 
 dear  friends  ;  felt  fvv^eetly  in  finging  hymns  with  them  :  and 
 made  my  efcape  to  the  farms  again,  without  being  dif- 
 covered  by  any  enemies,  as  I  knev/  of.  Thus  the  Lord  pre- 
 ferves  me  continually. 
 
 Friday,  September  10.  Longed  v/ith  intcnfc  defae  after 
 God  ;  my  whole  foul  feemed  impatient  to  be  conformed  to 
 him,  and  to  become  "  holy,  as  he  is  hoIy."~In  the  aftcrnodni 
 Jjirayed  with  a  dear  friend  privately,  and  had  the  prefence  of 
 
 F    2  God 
 
44  THELIFEOP  J.  D.  i-jt^. 
 
 God  with  us ;  our  fouls  united  together  to  reach  after  a  blefP 
 ed  immortality,  to  be  unclothed  of  the  body  of  fm  and  death, 
 and  to  enter  the  bleffed  world,  where  no  unclean  thing  en- 
 ters. O,  with  what  intenfe  dcfue  did  cur  fouls  long  for  that 
 bleffed  day,  that  we  might  be  freed  from  fm,  and  for  ever 
 live  to  and  In  our  God ! — In  the  evening,  took  leave  of  that 
 houfe  ;  but  iiift  kneeled  down  and  prayed ;  the  Lord  was  of 
 a  truth  in  the  midft  of  us  ;  it  M'as  a  fweet  parting  fcafon  j 
 felt  in  myfelf  much  fweetnefs  and  atFe6^tion  in  the  things  of 
 Cod.    Blclfed  be  God  for  every  fuch  divine  gale  of  his  Spirit, 
 
 to  fpeed  me  on  in  my  w?,y  to  the  new  Jerufalcm ! Felt  fome 
 
 fweetnefs  aftcrwaids,  and  fpent  the  evening  in  converfation 
 with  friends,  and  prayed  with  fome  life,  and  retired  to  reft 
 Very  late. 
 
 [The  five  next  days,  he  appears  to  have  been  in  an  exceed- 
 ing comfortable,  fweet  frame  of  mind,  for  the  mofl  part,  and 
 to  have  been  the  fubjeft  of  the  like  heavenly  exerciles  as  are 
 often  exprcfTed  in  preceding  p^f^gges  of  his  diary;  fuch  as, 
 having  his  heart  much  engaged  for  God,  wreftling  with  God 
 in  prayer  with  power  and  ardency,  enjoying  at  times  fweet 
 calmnefs  and  compofure  of  mind,  giving  himfelf  up  to  God 
 to  be  his  for  ever,  with  great  complacence  of  mind,  being 
 wholly  refigned  to  the  will  of  God,  that  God  might  do  with 
 him  what  he  pleafed,  longing  well  to  irr.provc  time,  having 
 the  eternal  world  as  it  were  brought  nigh,  longing  after  God 
 and  holinefs,  earntflly  dcfiring  a  complete  conformity  to 
 him,  and  wondering  how  poor  fouls  do  to  exifl  without 
 God.] 
 
 Thurfday,  Septem'ber  \().  At  night,  felt  exceeding  fweet- 
 ly  :  enjoyed  much  of  God  in  fecret  prayer :  felt  an  uncom- 
 mon refignation,  to  he  and  do  what  God  pleafed.  Some  days 
 paft,  I  {z\x.  creat  ferphxlty  on  account  of  my  paft  conduft; 
 ivy  hHterntfs,  and  want  of  Chridian  kindnefs  and  love,  has 
 been  very  d'jlrejfing  to  my  foul :  the  Lord  forgive  me  my 
 tinchr-frlan  ■warmth,  and  want  of  a  fpirit  of  meeknefs  -' 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  fpeaks  of  much  refignation,  calmnefsj, 
 and  peace  of  mind,  and  near  views  of  the  eternal  world.] 
 
 Saturday,  September  i8.  Felt  fome  compafTion  for  fouls, 
 nnd  mourned    I  had  no  more.     I   feel  much  more  kindnefs, 
 meknefs,  gentlenefs,  and  love  towards  all  mankind,  than  ever. 
 1  long  to  be  at  the  feet  of  my  enemies  and  pcrfecutors^:  enjoy- 
 ed 
 
Mt.2S-        Mr.    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  I  R  D.  45. 
 
 cd   fome   fweetnefs,  in  feeling  my  foul  conformed  to  Chrill 
 Jcfus,  and  given  away  to  him  for  ever,  in  prayer  to-day. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  fpeaks  of  much  dcjeftion  and  difcou- 
 ragcmeht,  from  an  apprehenfion  of  his  own  unfitnels  ever  to 
 do  any  good  in  preaching;  but  biefTes  God  for  all  dilpenfations 
 of  providence  and  grace  ;  finding  that  by  all  God  weaned  him. 
 more  from  the  world,  and  made  him  more  refigned. 
 
 The  next  ten  days,  he  appears  to  have  been  for  the  molt 
 part  under  great  degrees  of  melancholy,  exceedingly  dejefled 
 and  difcouraged  :  fpeaks  of  his  being  ready  to  give  up  all  tor 
 gone  refpe<fting  the  caufe  of  Chrill,  and  exceedingly  longing 
 to  die  :  yet  had  fome  Iweet  feafons  and  intervals  of  comfort, 
 and  fpecial  aififtancc  and  enlargement  in  the  duties  of  reli- 
 gion, and  in  performing  public  lervices,  and  confiderable  fuc- 
 cefs  in  them.] 
 
 Thurfday,  September  30.  Still  very  low  in  fpirlts,  and  dial 
 not  know  how  to  engage  in  any  work  or  bufmcfs,  elpecialiy 
 to  correal  fume  diforders  among  Chrifiians  ;  felt  as  though  I 
 had  no  power  to  be  faithful  in  that  regard.  However,  to- 
 wards noon,  preached  from  Deut.  viii.  2.  and  was  enabled 
 ■with  freedom  to  reprove  fome  things  in  Chrillians  condu<fV, 
 that  I  thought  very  unfuitable  and  irregular  ;  inhlted  near  two 
 'hours  on  this  fubjefl. 
 
 [Through  this,  and  the  two  following  weeks,  he  palTed 
 through  a  variety  of  exerciles;  he  was  frequently  dejefted, 
 and  felt  inward  diftieffes:  and  fometimcs  funk  into  the 
 depths  of  melancholy  :  at  which  turns,  he  was  not  exercifed 
 about  the  Hate  of  his  foul,  with  regard  to  the  favour  of  God^> 
 and  his  intereft  in  Chrill,  but  about  his  own  finful  infirmities, 
 and  unfitnefs  for  God's  fervice.  His  mind  appears  fome- 
 limes  extremely  deprclTed  and  funk  with  a  fenfe  of  inexpref- 
 fible  vilenefs.  But  in  the  mean  time,  he  fpeaks  of  many 
 feafons  of  comfort  and  fpiritual  refrefhraent,  wherein  his 
 heart  was  encouraged  and  llrengthened  in  God,  and  fweetly 
 refigned  to  his  will,  and  of  fome  feafons  of  very  high  degrees 
 of  fpiritual  confolation,  and  of  his  great  longings  after  holi- 
 nefs  and  conformity  to  God,  of  his  great  fear  of  offending 
 God,  of  his  heart's  being  fweetly  melted  in  religious  duties, 
 of  his  longing  for  the  advancement  of  Chrifc's  kingdom,  and 
 of  his  having  at  fome  times  much  afiiftance  in  preaching, 
 and  of  remarkable  cfre<n:s  on  the  auditory,] 
 
 Lord's 
 
4^  THE     LIFE     OF  yl.  D.  174* 
 
 Lord's  day,  Oftober  17.  Had  a  confiderable  fenfc  of  my  hclp- 
 leffncfs  and  inability ;  law  that  I  muft  be  dependent  on  God 
 for  all  I  want ;  and  efpccially  when  I  went  to  the  place  of 
 public  worfhip :  I  found  I  could  not  fpeak  a  word  tor  God 
 without  his  fpecial  help  and  alTiftance  :  I  went  into  the  afTem- 
 bly  trembling,  as  I  frequently  do,  under  a  fenfe  of  my  infuf- 
 jiciency  to  do  any  thing  in  the  caulc  of  God,  as  I  ought  to 
 do. — —But  it  pleafed   God  to  afford  me  much  afTiftance,  and 
 
 there  feemed  to  be  a  confiderable  eife(ft:  on  the  hearers. In, 
 
 the  evening,  I  felt  a  difpofition  to  praife  God  for  his  gocdncfs 
 to  me,,  in  (pecial,  that  he  had  enabled  me  in  fome  nieafure  to 
 be  faithful;  and  my  foul  rejoiced  to  think,  that  I  had  thus 
 performed  the  work  of  one  day  more,  and  was  one  day  nearer 
 my  eternal,  and  (I  truft)  my  heavenly  home.  O  that  I  might 
 be  "  faithful  to  the  death,  fulfilling  as  an  hireling  my  day," 
 till  the  Ihadcs  of  the  evening  of  life  ihall  free  rr;y  foul  from 
 the  toils  of  the  dayi  This  evening,  in  fecret  prayer,  I  felt 
 exceeding  folemn,  and  fuch  longing  defires  after  deliverance 
 from  fin,  and  after  conformity  to  God,  as  melted  my  heart. 
 Oh,  I  longed  to  be  *^  delivered  from  tiiisbody  of  death  !"  I  felt 
 inward  pleafing  pain,  that  I  could  not  be  conformed  to  God 
 
 entirely,  fully,  and  for  ever. 1  fcarcc  ever  preach  without 
 
 being  firfl  vifited  with  inward  confiifts  and  fore  trials.  BlefTed 
 be  the  Lord  for  thefe  trials  and  difliefles,  as  they  are  blelfed 
 for  my  humbling. 
 
 Monda)^,  Oftober  18.  In  the  morning,  felt  fome  fweet- 
 nefs,  but  flill  prclFed  through  fome  trials  of  foul.  My  life  is 
 a  conftant  mixture  of  confolaticns  and  conflifts,  and  will  be 
 fo  till  I  arrive  at  the  world  of  fpirits. 
 
 Tuefday,  Oiflober  19.  This  morning  and  lad:  night,  felt  a 
 fwect  longing  in  m,y  foul  after  holinefs :  my  foul  feem.ed  fo 
 to  reach  and  flretch  towards  the  mark  of  perfect  fandlity,  that 
 it  was  ready  to  break  with  longings. 
 
 Wednefday,   Oftobcr  20.    Exceeding  infirm  in  body,    ex- 
 
 ercifed  with  much  pain,  and  very  lifelcls  in  divine  things. 
 
 Felt  a  little  fwcetnefs  in  the  evening. 
 
 Thurfday,  Oftober  2i.  Had  a  very  deep  fenfe  of  the  vani- 
 ty of  the  world,  moil  of  the  day;  had  little  more  regard  to 
 it,  than  if  I  had  been  to  go  into  eternity  the  next  hour. 
 Through  divine  goodnefs,  I  felt  veryierious  and  folemn.  O, 
 I  love  to  live  on  the  brink  of  eternity,  in  my  views  and  me- 
 ditations! This  gives  me  a  fweet,  awful,  and  reverential 
 fenfe  and  apprehcnfion  of  God  and  divine  things,  when  I  fee 
 myfelf  as  it  wtxt  ftandlng  btfore  ihe  jiidgment-Jeat  of  Chrifi. 
 
 Friday,  October  22.  tJncommoniy  weaned  from  the  world 
 
 to-day  ; 
 
^/.  25-        Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  4; 
 
 lo-day  :  my  foul  delighted  to  be  z  fir  anger  and  pilgrim  on  the 
 earth  ;  I  felt  a  difpolition  in  me  never  to  have  any  thmg  to  do 
 with  this  world :  the  character  giVen  of  fome  of  the  ancient 
 people  of  God,  in  Heb.  xi,  13.  was  very  pleafmg  to  mCj 
 *'  'I'hey  confcifed  ihat  they  were  pilgrims  and  flrangers  on  the 
 "  earth,"  by  their  daily  prafticc ;  and  O  that  I  could  always 
 
 do  (o\ Spent  fome  conliderable  time,  in  a  pleafant  grove, 
 
 in  prayer  and  meditation.  O  it  is  fweet,  to  be  thus  weaned 
 from  friends,  and  from  myfelf,  and  dead  to  the  prefent  world, 
 that  fo  I  may  live  wholly  to  and  upon  the  bleffed  God!     Saw 
 
 myfelf  iittie,  low,  and   vile  in  myfelf. In  the   after:ioon, 
 
 preached  at  Bethlehem,  from  Deut.  viii.  2.  and  felt  fweetly 
 both  in  prayer  and  preaching; :  God  helped  me  to  fpeak  to  the 
 hearts  of  dear  Chriftians.  Bleffed  be  the  Lord  for  this  feafon  ; 
 I  truft,  they  and  I  fhall  rejoice  on  this  account  to  all  eternity. 
 
 Dear  Mr  Bellamy  came  in,  while  1  was  making  the  firft 
 
 prayer,  (being  returned  home  from  a  journey) ;  and  after 
 meeting,  we  walked  away  together,  and  fpent  the  evening  in 
 fweetly  converfing  on  divine  things,  and  praying  togetherj, 
 with  fweet  and  tender  love  to  each  other,  and  returned  to  reft 
 with  our  hearts  in  a  ferious  fpiritual  frame. 
 ' ,  Saturday,  06lober  23.  Something  perplexed  and  confufed. 
 Rode  this  day  from  Bethlehem  to  Simlbury. 
 
 Lord's  day,  Oftober  24.  Felt  fo  vile  and  unworthy,  that  X 
 fcarce  knew  how  to  converfe  with  human  creatures. 
 
 Monday,  Oftober  25.  [At  Turky- Hills]  In  the  evening 
 enjoyed  the  divine  prefencc  in  fecret  prayer :  it  was  a  fweet 
 and  comfortable  feafon  to  me :  my  foul  longed  for  Cod^  for 
 the  living  God:  enjoyed  a  fweet  folemnity  of  fpirit,  and  long- 
 ing defire  after  the  recovery  of  the  divine  image  in  my  foul : 
 '*  Then  fhall  I  be  fatisfied,  when  I  fhall  awake  in  God's  like- 
 ''*  nefs,"  and  never  before. 
 
 Tuefday,  Oftob'er  26.  [At  Weft-SufHcld]  Underwent  the 
 moft  dreadful  diftreffes,  under  a  fenfe  of  my  own  unworthi- 
 nefs  :  it  feemed  to  me,  I  deferved  rather  to  be  driven  out  of 
 the  place,  than  to  have  any  body  treat  me  with  any  kindnefs, 
 or  come  to  hear  me  preach.  And  verilv  my  fplrits  were  fo 
 JeprefFed  at  this  time,  as  v/ell  as  at  many  others,  that  it  was 
 impoffible  I  fhould  treat  immortal  fouls  with  fairhfulnefs :  I 
 could  not  deal  clofely  and  faithfully  v-ith  them,  I  felt  xo  infi- 
 nitely vile  in  m.yfelf.  Oh,  what  dufi  and  ajhes  I  am,  to  thliik 
 ef^ preaching  the  gofpel  to  others!  Indeed  I  never  can  be 
 faithful  for  one  moment,  but  fliall  certainly  "  dai:b  with  un- 
 **  tempered  mortar,''  if  God  do  not  grant  me  fpecial  help.— 
 In  the  evening,  I  went  to  the  meeting-houfe,  and  it  icoked- 
 
 to 
 
4%  THELIFEOF  ^.  D,  1742^ 
 
 to  me  near  as  cafy  for  one  to  rife  out  of  the  grave  and  preachy 
 as  for  me.  However,  God  afforded  me  fome  life  and  pov/er, 
 both  in  prayer  and  fermon  :  God  was  pleafed  to  lift  me  up, 
 and  fhew  me  that  he  could  enable  mc  to  preach.  O  the  won- 
 derful goodnefs  of  God  to  fo  vile  a  fmner  ! Returned  to 
 
 my  quarters ;  and  enjoyed  fome  fweetnefs  in  prayer  alone, 
 and  mourned  that  I  could  not  live  more  to  God. 
 
 Wednefday,  Oftober  27.  Spent  the  forenoon  in  prayer  and 
 meditation  :  was  not  a  little  concerned  about  preaching  in  the 
 afternoon :  felt  exceedingly  -without  Jlrength,  and  very  help- 
 lefs  indeed  :  went  into  the  mceting-houfe,  afhamed  to  fee  any 
 come  to  hear  fuch  an  unfpcakably  worthlefs  wretch.  How- 
 ever, God  enabled  me  to  fpeak  with  clearnefs,  power^  and 
 pungency.  But  there  was  fome  noife  and  tumult  in  the 
 afTembly,  that  I  did  not  well  like,  and  endeavoured  to  bear 
 public    teftimony   againfl,    with    moderation    and    mildnefs, 
 
 through   the   current  of  my   difcourfe. In  the  evening, 
 
 was  enabled  to  be  in  fome  meafure  thankful  and  devoted  to 
 God. 
 
 [The  frames  and  exercifes  of  his  mind,  during  the  four  next 
 days,  were  moftly  very  fimilar  to  thofe  of  the  two  days  part; 
 excepting  intervals  of  confiderable  degrees  of  divine  peace 
 and  confolation. 
 
 The  things  expreffed  within  the  fpace  of  the  three  follow- 
 ing days  are  fuch  as  thefe ;  fome  feafons  of  deje£lion,  mourn- 
 ing for  being  fo  deftitute  of  the  exercifes  of  grace,  longing 
 to  be  delivered  from  fm,  prelTmg  after  more  of  God,  feafons 
 of  fwcet  confolation,  precious  and  intimate  converfe  with  God 
 
 in  fecret  prayer,  fweetnefs  of  Chriftian  converfation,  ^c. 
 
 Within  this  time  he  rode  from  Suffield  to  Eaflbury,  Hebron, 
 and  Lebanon.] 
 
 Thurfday,  November  4.  [At  Lebanon]  Saw  much  of  my 
 nothingnefs  moft  of  this  day  :  but  felt  concerned  that  I  had 
 no  more  fenfe  of  my  infufficiency  and  unworthinefs.  O  it  is 
 fwcet  lying  In  the  dnj} !  But  it  is  diftre fling  to  feel  in  my  foul 
 
 that  heii  of  corruption,  which  Hill  remains  in  me. In  the 
 
 afternoon,  had  a  fenfe  of  the  fweetnefs  of  a  ftrift,  clofe,  and 
 conftant  devotednefs  to  God,  and  my  foul  was  comforted 
 with  the  confolations  of  God;  my  foul  felt  a  pleafing,  yet 
 painful  concern,  left  I  fliould  fpcnd  fome  moments  without 
 
 God.     O  may  I  always  liv:  to  God ! In  the  evening,  was 
 
 vifited  by  fome  friends,  and  fpent  the  time  in  prayer  and  fuch 
 converfation  as  tended  to  our  edification.     It  was  a  comfort- 
 able 
 
Mi.  IS'        ^  ^     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  4^ 
 
 able  feafon  to  my  foul :  I  fck  an  intenfc  defirc  to  fpend  every 
 
 moment   for   God. God  is  unfpeakably   gracious  to  me 
 
 continually :  in  times  pall,  he  has  given  me  inexpreffible 
 fweetnefs  in  the  performance  of  duty :  frequently  my  foul 
 has  enjoyed  much  of  God  ;  but  has  been  ready  to  fay,  "  Lord, 
 *'  it  is  good  to  be  here  ;"  and  fo  to  indulge  fluth,  wiiile  I  have 
 Jived  on  the  fweetnefs  of  my  feelings.  But  of  late,  God  has 
 been  pleafed  t(j  keep  my  foul  hungry,  almoft  continually;  fo 
 that  I  have  been  liiled  with  a  kind  of  a  plealing  pain.  When 
 I  leally  enjoy  God,  I  feel  my  defa'Cj  of  hiji'i  the  more  infa- 
 tlable,  and  my  thirlVings  after  holinefs  tiie  ra  )rc  unqucnch- 
 iible  ;  and  the  Lord  will  not  allow  me  to  feci  as  though  I  weie 
 fully  fupplied  and  fatisiied,  but  keeps  me  flill  reaching  for- 
 ward ;  and  I  feel  barren  and  empty,  as  though  I  could  not 
 Twe,  without  more  of  God  in  me;  1  feel  afhaincd  and  guilty 
 before  Cod.  Oil!  I  fee,  *'  the  law  is  fpiritual,  but  I  am  crr- 
 "  nal."  I  do  not,  I  cannot  live  lo  God.  Oh  for  holinefs ! 
 Oh  for  more  of  God  in  my  foul !  Oh  this  pleafmg  pain  '  It 
 makes  my  foul  prefs  after  God;  the  language  of  it  is,  "  Then 
 '•'  fliall  I  be  fatisfied,  when  I  awake  in  God's  likenefs,"  (Pfal- 
 xvii.  ult.) ;  but  never,  never  before  :  and  confequently  I  am 
 engaged  to  "  prefs  towards  the  mark,"  day  by  day.  O  that  I 
 may  feel  this  continual  hunger,  and  not  be  retarded,  but  rather 
 animated  by  every  cluftcr  from  Canaan,  to  reach  forward  in 
 the  narrow  way,  for  the  full  eajoym.ent  and  poireiTion  of  the 
 heavenly  inheritance!  O  that  I  may  never  loiter  in  my  hea- 
 venly journey  ! 
 
 [Thefc  infatiable  defircs  after  Cod  and  holinefs  continued 
 the  two  next  days,  with  a  great  fenfe  of  his  own  exceeding 
 unworthincfs,  and  the  nothingncfs  of  the  things  of  this 
 world.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  November  7.  \_\t  Miilingtcn]  It  feemcd  as  if 
 ■fuch  an  unholy  wretch  as  I  never  could  airlve  at  tliat  blclfed- 
 nziif  to  be  "  holy,  as  God  is  holy."  At  noon,  I  longed  for 
 fanftification,  and  conformity  to  God,  Oh,  that  is  the 
 ALL,  Tii£  ALL  !  The  Lord  help  me  to  prefs  after  Cr,d  for 
 ever. 
 
 JMonday,  November  8.  Tov/ard?;  nlglit,  enjoyed  \rx.c\\ 
 fweetnefs  in  fccrct  prayer,  fo  ihat  my  foul  longed  for  an  arri- 
 \'al  ill  the  heavtnly  country,  the  biefTed  paiadife  of  God. 
 Through  divine  g^od.iefs,  I  have  fcarce  feen  the  cay,  for 
 two  months,  but  death  has  looked  fo  plcafant  to  me  at  one 
 time  or  other  of  the  day,  that  I  could  have  rejo'ced  the /r."- 
 
50  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  J.  D.  1742. 
 
 fent  ftiould  be  my  lafi,  notwkh (landing  my  prefTihg  inward 
 trials  and  conflicts:  and  I  truft,  the  Lord  will  finally  make 
 me  a  conqueror,  and  more  than  fo  ;  that  I  fhall  be  able  to  ufe 
 that  triumphant  language,  "  O  death,  where  is  thy  fling!" 
 And,  "  O  grave,  where  is  thy  viftory !" 
 
 [Within  the  next  ten  days,  the  following  things  are  ex- 
 prefled  :  longing  and  wrellling  to  be  holy,  and  to  live  to  God ; 
 a  defne  that  every  Tingle  thought  might  be  for  God ;  feeling 
 guilty,  that  his  thoughts  were  no  more  fwallowed  up  in  God ; 
 Iweet  folcmnity  and  calmnefs  of  mind  ;  fubmifTion  and  refig- 
 nation  to  God  ;  great  weanednefs  from  the  world ;  abafement 
 in  the  dufl: ;  grief  at  fome  vainconverfation  that  was  obferved  ; 
 fweetnefs  from  time  to  time  in  fecret  prayer,  and  in  conver- 
 fmg  and  praying  with  Chriftian  friends.  And  every  day  he 
 appears  to  have  been  greatly  engaged  in  the  great  bufinefs  of 
 religion  and  living  to  God,  without  interruption.] 
 
 Friday,  November  19.  [At  New- Haven]  Received  a  letter 
 from  the  Reverend  Mr  Pemberton  of  New- York,  defiring  me 
 fpeedily  to  go  down  thither,  and  confult  about  the  Indian 
 affairs  in  thofe  parts,  and  to  meet  certain  gentlemen  there 
 that  were  intruded  with  thofe  affairs.  My  mind  was  inftant- 
 ly  feized  with  concern ;  fo  I  retired  with  two  or  three  Chri- 
 fiian  friends,  and  prayed ;  and  indeed  it  was  a  fweet  time  with 
 me ;  I  was  enabled  to  leave  myfelf  and  all  my  concerns  with 
 God  ;  and  taking  leave  of  friends,  1  rode  to  Ripton,  and  was 
 comforted  in  an  opportunity  to  fee  and  converfe  with  dear 
 Mr  Mills. 
 
 [In  the  four  next  following  days,  he  was  fometimes  op- 
 preffed  with  the  weight  of  that  great  affair,  about  which  Mr 
 Pemberton  had  written  to  him ;  but  was  enabled  from  time  to 
 time  to  "  call  his  burden  on  the  Lord,''  and  to  commit  him- 
 fclf  and  alj  his  concerns  to  him :  and  he  continued  fliii  in  a 
 fenfe  of  the  excellency  of  holinefs,  and  longings  after  it,  and 
 earneft  delires  of  the  advanccir.ent  of  Chriff  s  kingdom  in  the 
 world ;  and  had  from  time  to  time  fweet  comfort  in  medita- 
 tion and  prayer.] 
 
 Wednefday,  November  24.  Came  to  New- York ;  felt  fliil 
 much  concerned  about  the  importance  of  my  bufmefs  ;  put  up 
 many  earneft  requefts  to  God  for  his  help  and  direftion;  was 
 confufed  with  the  noife  and  tumult  of  the  city;  enjoyed  but 
 little  time  alcnc  with  God;  but'my  foul  longed  after  him. 
 
 Thurfday, 
 
 I 
 
A/.  25-      Mr    D  A  VID     B  R  AINERD.  51 
 
 Thurfday,  November  25.  Spent  much  time  in  prayer  and 
 fupplication :  was  examined  by  fome  gentlemen,  of  my  Chri- 
 "ftian  experiences,  and  my  acquaintance  with  divinity,  and 
 fome  other  ftudics,  in  order  to  my  improvement  in  that  im- 
 portant affair  of  gofpellizing  the  Heathen  * :  was  made  fenfi- 
 ble  of  my  great  ignorance  and  unfitnefs  for  public  fervice  :  I 
 had  the  moft  abaling  thoughts  of  myfelf,  I  think,  that  ever 
 I  had ;  I  thought  myfelf  the  worfl  wretch  that  ever  lived :  it 
 hurt  me,  and  pained  my  very  heart,  that  any  body  fliould  fhew 
 me  any  refpeft.  Alas!  methought,  how  fadly  they  are  de- 
 ceived in  me!  how  miferably  would  they  be  difappointed,  if 
 
 they  knew  my  inllde  !   Oh  my  heart ! And  in  this  deprefT- 
 
 cd  condition,  I  was  forced  to  go  and  preach  to  a  confiderable 
 afTembly,  before  fome  grave  and  learned  minifters;  but  felt 
 fuch  a  preffure  from  a  fenfe  of  my  vilenefs,  ignorance,  and 
 unfitnefs  to  appear  in  public,  that  I  was  almoft  overcome  with 
 it ;  my  foul  was  grieved  for  the  congregation,  that  they  fhould 
 fit  there  to  hear  fuch  a  dead  dog  as  I  preach  ;  I  thought  my- 
 felf infinitely  indebted  to  the  people,  gnd  longed  that    God 
 
 would  reward  them  with  the  rewards  of  his  grace. 1  fpent 
 
 much  of  the  evening  alone. 
 
 *  Thefc  gentlemen  that  examined  Mr  Brainerd,  were  the  eor- 
 refpondents  in  New- York,  New-Jerfey,  and  Penfylvania,  of  the  ho- 
 nourable fociety  in  Scotland  for  propagating  Chriftian  knowledge  ; 
 to  whom  was  committed  the  management  of  their  affaira  in  thofc 
 parts,  aad  who  were  now  met  at  New- York. 
 
 G  2-  PART 
 
PART       IV. 
 
 From  the  time  of  his  examination  by  the  Cor-> 
 refpondeiits  of  the  fociety  for  propagating  Chri- 
 ilian  knowledge,  and  being  appointed  their 
 Mijfwnary^  to  his  firll:  entrance  on  the  buC- 
 nefs  of  his  miffion  among  the  Indians  at 
 Kaunaumeek. 
 
 FRiday,  Novrmber  26.  Had  flill  a  fcnfc  of  my  great  vile- 
 nefs,  and  endeavoured  as  much  as  I  could  to  keep  alone. 
 Oh,  what  a  nothing,  what  du{l  and  afhes  am  II— Enjoyed 
 iomt  peace  and  comfort  in  fprcadhig  my  complaints  befoie  the 
 God  of  all  groce. 
 
 Siturday,  November  27.  ComrtiUted  my  fbiil  to  God  with 
 fome  degree  of  comfort;  left  New-York  about  nine  in  the 
 morning  ;  came  av/ay  with  a  difire/nng  fenfe  fill  of  my  uTx- 
 fpcakablo  unworthinefs.  Surely  I  miiy  well  love  all  my  brc- 
 tliren  ;  for  none  of  them  all  is  fo  vile  as  I ;  whatever  thcj^  do 
 outwardly,  yet  it  fcems  to  me  none  is  confcious  of  fo  much 
 guilt  befoie  God.  Oh  my  learncfs,  my  barrennefs,  my  carr 
 rality,    and  pafl:  bitterncfs,    aiid  want  of  a  gofpel-tcmper ! 
 
 Tliefc  things  opprcfs   jny    foul.— Rode    from    Ncw-lork^ 
 
 thirty  miles,  to  W^hlte  Plains,  ?nd  m.oft  of  the  way  conti- 
 nued lifting  up  my  licart  to  G(.^d  for  mercy  and  purifying 
 grace:  and  fpcnt  the  evenlr.g  much  dejefted  in  fpiiit. 
 
 [The  three  next  days,  I:e  continued  in  this  frame,  in  a 
 great  fenfe  of  his  own  vilcncf'^,  with  an  evident  mixture  of 
 melancholy;  in  no  fmall  degree  :  but  had  fome  intervals  of 
 comfort,  and  God's  fcnfblc  pn.  fence  with  him.] 
 
 Vednefday,  December  i.  ]My  fcul  breathed  after  God^ 
 in  iwcct  fpiritual  and  longing  dcfires  of  contcrn.iry  to  him  ; 
 r.y  f  ul  was  brought  to  rcH  itfeif  and  all  en  his  rich  grace, 
 arid  felt  /trcogth  and  encouragement  to  do  or  fyifer  any  thing 
 
 that 
 
m.2t;.        iM R     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  53 
 
 that  divine  providence  fhould  allot  me. Rode  about  twen- 
 ty miles  from  Stratficld  to  Newton. 
 
 [W^ithin  the  fpace  of  the  next  nine  daj^s,  he  went  a  jour- 
 ney from  Newton  to  Haddam,  his  native  town ;  and  after 
 flayin<T  there  fome  days,  returned  again  into  the  weftern  part 
 of  Conneflicut,  and  came  to  Southbury.  In  his  account  of 
 the  frames  and  exercifes  of  his  mind,  during  this  fpace  of 
 time,  are  fuch  things  as  thefe;  frequent  turns  of  dejeftion,  a 
 fenfe  of  his  vilenels,  emptinefs,  and  an  wnfathomable  abyfs 
 of  defperate  wickednefs  in  his  heart,  attended  with  a  convic- 
 tion that  he  had  never  feen  but  little  of  it :  bitterly  mourning 
 over  his  barrennefs,  being  greatly  grieved  that  he  could  nor 
 live  to  God,  to  whom  he  owed  his  all  tm  thonfand  timesy 
 crying  out,  "  My  leannefs,  ray  leannefs!''  a  fenfe  of  the 
 meetnefs  and  fuitablenefs  of  his  lying  in  the  dufi:  beneath 
 God's  feet ;  fervency  and  ardour  in  prayer  ;  longing  to  live  to 
 God ;  a  being  afflicled  with  fome  impertinent  trifling  conver- 
 fation  that  he  heard;  but  enjoying  fweetnefs  in  Chriftian 
 convcrfation.] 
 
 Saturday,  December  11.  Converfed  with  a  dear  friend,  t«»-' 
 whom  I  had  thought  of  giving  a  liberal  education,  and  being 
 at  the  whole  charge  of  it,  that  he  might  be  litted  for  the  go- 
 fpel-miniftry  *.  I  acquainted  him  with  my  tlioughts  in  that 
 matter,  and  fo  left  him  to  confider  of  it.  till  I  fnould  fee  him 
 again.  Then  I  rode  to  Bethlehem,  and  fo  came  to  Mr  Bel- 
 lamy's lodgings ;  fpent  the  evening  with  him  in  fweet  convcr- 
 
 *  rvIrBraincrd  having  nov/  undertaken  the  bufiaefs  of  a  ir.iffionary 
 to  the  Indians,  and  expecfting  in  a  Jiule  time  to  leave  his  native 
 cojTitry,  to  go  among  ihe  fivages,  into  the  wildernefs,  far  d  hi  ant, 
 and  fpend  tht  remainder  of  his  life  among  them,  and  having  fome 
 cdate  left  him  by  his  father,  and  thinking  he  (hould  have  no  occa- 
 fion  for  it  among  them,  (though  afterv/ards,  as  he  told  me,  he 
 found  himfclf  miftaken),  he  fet  himfelf  to  tI)iok  which  way  he  migiit 
 ipend  it  mcft  to  the  glory  of  God  ;  and  ro  way  prefenting  to  Jiis 
 thouglus,  wherein  he  could  do  more  good  with  it,  than  by  being  at 
 the  charge  of  educating  fome  young  perfrjn  for  the  miniflry,  that 
 appeared  to  be  of  good  abilities,  and  well  difpofed,  he  pitched  lip- 
 on  this  pcrfon  here  fpoken  of,  to  this  end  :  who  accordingly  was 
 foon  pat  to  learning;  and  Mr  Brainerd  continued  to  be  at  the 
 charge  of  his  education  from  year  to  year,  fu  long  as  he  (Mr  Brain- 
 erd) lived,  which  was  till  this  young  nun  was  carried  through  his 
 l\}lrd  year  in  college. 
 
 fution 
 
54  THELIFEOF  J.  D.  ly^i. 
 
 fation  and  prayer :  we  recommended  the  important  concern 
 before  mentioned  (of  fending  my  friend  to  college)  unto  the 
 God  of  all  grace.  Bleifed  be  the  Lord  for  this  evening's  op- 
 portunity together. 
 
 Lord's  day,  December  12.  I  felt,  in  the  morning,  as  if  I 
 had  little  or  no  power  either  to  pray  or  preach,  and  felt  z. 
 diftrefling  need  of  divine  help  ;  1  went  to  meeting  trembling  : 
 but  it  pleafed  God  to  aflilt  me  in  prayer  and  fermon:  1  think, 
 my  foul  Icarce  ever  penetrated  lo  far  into  the  immaterial 
 world,  in  any  one  prayer  that  ever  1  made,  nor  were  my  de- 
 votions ever  fo  much  refined,  and  free  from  grofs  conceptions 
 and  imaginations  framed  from  beholding  material  objedts.  X 
 preached  with  fome  fweetnefs,  from  Matth.  vi.  33.  "  But 
 **  feck  ye  firfl  the  kingdom  of  God,"  6c. ;  and  in  the  afternoon 
 from  Rom.  xv.  30.  *'  And  now  I  bcfeech  you,  brethren,"  6c. 
 There  was  much  aifedlion  in  the  aflembly.  This  has  been  a 
 fweet  Sabbath  to  me  ;  and  bleffed  be  God,  I  have  reafon  to 
 think,  that  my  religion  is  become  more  refined  and  fpiritual, 
 by  means  of  my  late  inward  conflidls.  Amen.  May  I  always 
 be  willing  that  God  fhonld  ufe  his  own  methods  with  me  ! 
 
 Monday,  December  13.  Joined  in  prayer  with  Mr  Bella- 
 my ;  and  found  fweetnels  and  compofure  in  parting  with  him, 
 who  went  a  journey.  Enjoyed  fome  fweetnefs  through  the 
 day  ;  and  juft  at  night  rode  down  to  Woodbury. 
 
 Tuefday,  December  14.  Some  perplexity  hung  on  my 
 mind  :  was  diftre/Ted  lafl:  night  and  this  morning,  for  the  in- 
 terefl  of  Zion,  efpecially  on  account  of  the  falfe  appear ancts. 
 «/  religion,  that  do  but  rather  breed  confufion,  efpecially  in, 
 fome  places.  I  cried  to  God  for  help,  to  enable  me  to  bear 
 teflimony  againft  thofe  things,  which  inftead  of  promoting, 
 do  but  hinder  the  progrefs  of  vital  piety.  In  the  afternoon;^ 
 rode  down  to  Southbury,  and  converfed  again  with  my  friend 
 about  the  important  affair  of  his  following  the  work  of  the 
 minifcry  ;  and  he  appeared  much  inclined  to  devote  himfelf  to 
 that  work,  if  God  fticuid  fucceed  his  attempts  to  qualify 
 himfelf  for  fo  great  a  work.  In  the  evening  I  preached 
 from  1  Their,  iv.  8.  ;  and  endeavoured,  though  with  ten- 
 dernefs,  to  undermine  falfe  religion.  The  Lord  gave  me 
 fome  afTiflance  ;  but,  however,  I  leemed  fo  vile,  I  was  aflia- 
 med  to  be  feen  when  I  came  out  of  the  meeting-houfe. 
 
 Wedncfdaj',  December  15.  Enjoyed  fomething  of  God  to- 
 day, both  in  fecret  and  fecial  prayer;  but  was  fenfble  of 
 much  barrennefs,  and  dtft€i  in  duty,  as  well  as  my  inability 
 to  help  myl'elf  for  the  time  to  come,  or  t®  perform  the  work 
 
 and 
 
JEt.  25.      Mr     DAVID     BRAINERD.  55 
 
 and  bufinefs  I  have  to  do.  Afterwards,  felt  much  of  the 
 fweetnefs  of  religion,  and  the  tendernefs  of  the  gofpel-temper : 
 ■was  far  from  bitternefs,  and  found  a  dear  love  to  all  mankind, 
 ,and  was  afraid  of  fcarcely  any  thing  fo  much  as  left  fome  mo- 
 tion of  anger  or  refentment  ftiould,  fome  time  or  other,  creep 
 into  my  heart.  Had  fome  comforting  foul-refreihing  dif- 
 coarfe  with  fome  dear  friends,  juft  as  we  took  our  leave  of 
 each  other,  and  fuppofed  it  might  be  likely  we  fhould  not  meet 
 again  till  we  came  to  the  eternal  world  *.  But  I  doubt  not, 
 through  grace,  but  that  fome  of  us  Ihall  have  a  happy  meeting 
 there,  and  blefs  God  for  this  feafon,  as  well  as  many  others. 
 Amen. 
 
 Thurfday,  December.  16.  Rode  down  to  Derby;  had 
 fome  Iweet  thoughts  on  the  road  :  my  thoughts  were  very  clear, 
 cfpecially  on  the  effence  of  our  falvation  by  Chrift,  from 
 thofe  words,  "  Thou  ihalt  call  his  name  Jefus,"  6c. 
 
 Friday,  December  17.  Spent  much  time  in  fweet  conver- 
 fation  on  fpiritual  things  with  dear  Mr  Humphreys.  Rode 
 to  Ripton ;  fpent  fome  time  in  prayer  with  dear  Chriftian 
 friends. 
 
 Saturday,  December  1 8.  Spent  much  time  in  prayer  in  the 
 woods :  feemed  raifed  above  the  things  of  the  world :  my 
 foul  was  ftrong  in  the  Lord  of  hofts :  but  was  fenfible  of 
 great  barrcnnefs. 
 
 Lord's  day,  December  19.  At  the  facrament  of  the 
 Lord's  fupper,  feemed  ftrong  in  the  Lord ;  and  the  world, 
 with  all  its  frowns  and  flatteries,  in  a  great  meafure  difap- 
 pearcd,  fo  that  m.y  foul  had  nothing  to  do  with  them  :  and  I 
 felt  a  difpofition  to  be  wholly  and  for  ever  the  Lord's. — -In 
 the  evening,  enjoyed  fomething  of  the  divine  prcfence;  had 
 a  humbling  fenfe  of  my  vilenefs,  barrennefs,  and  finfulnefs. 
 Oh,  it  wounded  me,  "to  think  of  the  mifmiprovement  of 
 time  I  "  God  be  merciful  to  me  a  fmner." 
 
 Monday,  December  20.  Spent  this  day  in  prayer,  read- 
 ing, and  writing  ;  and  enjoyed  fome  alTiilance,  efpecially  in 
 correfting  fome  thoughts  on  a  certain  fubje^t;  but  had  a 
 mournful  fenfe  of  my  barrennefs. 
 
 *  It  had  been  determined  by  thecommillioners,  who  employed  Mr 
 Brainerd  as  a  miffionary,  that  he  fhould  go  as  foon  as  might  be  con- 
 Tcniently  to  the  Indians  living  near  the  Forks  of  Dehuvare  river  in 
 Penfylvania,  and  the  Indians  on  Sufquehanneh  river  ;  which  being 
 far  off,  where  he  would  be  expofed  to  many  hardiliips  and  dangers; 
 this  was  the  occafion  tf  his  taking  leave  of  his  friends  in  this  man- 
 ner. 
 
 Xuefday, 
 
5^  T  H  E    L  I  y  E     O  F  J.  D.  1742. 
 
 Tuefday,  December  21.  Had  a  fcnfc  of  my  infufficiency 
 for  any  public  work  and  bufmcfs,  as  well  as  to  live  to  Gcd. 
 I  rode  over  to  Derby,  and  preached  there :  it  pleafed  God  to 
 give  me  very  fwcet  afliftance  and  enlargement,  and  to  enable 
 
 me  to    fpeak  with  a   (oft  and  tender  power  and  energy. 
 
 We  had  afterwards  a  comfortable  evening  in  fmging  and 
 prayer  :  God  enabled  me  to  pray  with  as  much  fpirituality 
 and  uveetnefs  as  I  have  done  for  fome  time :  my  mind  fccra- 
 cd  to  be  unclothed  of  fenfe  and  imagination,  and  was  in  a 
 meafure  let  into  the  immaterial  world  of  fpirits.  This  day 
 and  evening  was,  I  trufl,  through  infinite  goodntfs,  made 
 very  profitable  to  a  number  ot  us,  to  advance  our  fouls  in 
 holinefs  and  conformity  to  God  :  the  glory  be  to  him  for- 
 ever. Amen.  How  bleffed  it  is  to  grow  more  and  more 
 like  God ! 
 
 Wednefday,  December  22.  Enjoyed  fome  afllftance  in 
 preaching  at  Ripton ;  but  my  foul  mourned  within  me  for 
 my  barrennefs, 
 
 Thurfday,  December  23.  Enjoyed,  I  truft,  fomething  of 
 God  this  morning  in  fecret.  Oh  how  divinely  fweet  is  it  to 
 «ome  into  the  fecret  of  his  prefence,  and  abide  in  his  pavilion  ! 
 
 Took  an  affectionate  leave  of  friends,  not  expe  fling  to 
 
 fee  them  again  for  a  very  confiderable  time,  if  ever  in  this 
 world.  Rode  with  Mr  Humphreys  to  his  houfe  at  Derby  ; 
 (pent  the  time  in  fweet  converfation ;  my  foul  was  refiefhed 
 and  fvveetly  melted  with  divine  things.  Oh  that  I  -was  ahvays 
 confecrated  to  God!  Near  night,  I  rode  to  New-Haven,  and 
 there  enjoyed  fome  fweetnefs  in  prayer  and  converfation, 
 with  fome  dear  Chriflian  friends :  my  mind  was  fweetly 
 ferious  and  ccmpofed :  but  alas  1  I  too  much  loft  the  fenfe  of 
 divine  things. 
 
 [He  continued  much  in  the  fame  frame  of  mind,  and  in 
 like  exercifes,  the  two  following  days.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  December  16.  Felt  much  fweetnefs  f.nd 
 tendcrnefs  iu  prayer,  efpecially  my  whole  foul  fecmed  to 
 love  my  worfl:  enemies,  and  was  enabled  to  pray  for  thofc 
 that  are  flrangers  and  enemies  to  God  with  a  great  degree  o? 
 foftnefs  and  pathetic  fervour.  In  the  evening,  rode  froni 
 New-Haven  to  Branford,  after  I  had  kncekd  down  and 
 prayed  with  a  number  of  dear  Chriftir-n  friends  in  a  very  re- 
 tired place  in  the  woods,  and  fo  parted. 
 
 Monday,  December  27.  Enjoyed  a, precious  feafcn  indeed; 
 had  a  Avcet  melting  fenfe  cf  divine  thii^g^,   cf  the  pure  fpi- 
 
 ritualiry 
 
/E^  25.        Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  57 
 
 rituality  of  the  religion  of  Chrift  Jefus.  In  the  evening,  X 
 preached  from  Match,  vi.  33.  with  much  freedom,  and 
 fweet  power  and  pungency :  the  prefence  of  God  attended 
 our  meeting.  O  the  fvveetnefs,  the  tendernefs  I  felt  in  my 
 foiii!  if  ever  I  felt  the  temper  of  Chiilt,  I  had  fome  ienfe 
 of  it  now.  Bleffed  be  my  God,  I  have  feldom  enjoyed  a 
 more  comfortable  and  profitable  day  than  this.  O  that  I 
 could  fpend  all  my  time  for  God  ! 
 
 Tuelday,  December  28.  Rode  from  Branford  to  Haddara. 
 In  the  morning,  my  clearnefs  and  fweetnefs  in  divine  things 
 continued ;  but  afterwards  my  I'piritual  lile  lenlibly  decli- 
 ned. 
 
 [The  next  twelve  days,  he  was  for  the  mofl  part  extremely 
 deje6led,  difcouragcd,  and  diftrelTed,  and  was  evidently  very 
 much  under  the  power  of  m.elanchcly;  and  there  are  from 
 day  to  day  mod  i?itter  complaints  ot  exceeding  vllenefs,  ig- 
 norance, corruption,  an  amazing  load  of  guilt,  unworthinels 
 to  creep  on  God's  earth,  everlafting  ufcleirncll,  fitnefs  for 
 nothing,  Z)c.  ;  and  fometimcs  exprefTions  even  of  horror  at 
 the  thoughts  of  ever  preaching  again.  But  yet  in  this  time 
 of  great  dejeftion,  he  fpeaics  of  feveral  intervals  of  divine 
 help  and  comfort. 
 
 The  three  next  days,  which  were  fpent  at  Hebron  and  the 
 Crank,  (a  parifli  in  Lebanon),  he  had  relief,  and  enjoyed  cor.- 
 fiderable  comfort.] 
 
 Friday,  January  14.  1742-3.  My  fpiritual  confii<ri:s  to-day 
 were  unfptakably  dreadful,  heavier  than  the  mountains  and 
 overflowing  floods  :  I  feemed  inclofed,  as  it  were,  in  hell  ;t- 
 felf :  I  was  deprived  of  all  fenfe  of  God,  even  of  the  being  of 
 a  God;  and  that  v,'as  my  mlfery.  I  had  no  awful  apprehen- 
 fions  of  God  as  angry.  This  was  dJilrefs,  the  neareit  a-l:ia 
 to  the  damned's  torments,  that  I  ever  endujed  ;  their  torment, 
 I  am  fure,  will  confifl  much  in  a  privation  of  God,  and  ccn- 
 fcquently  of  all  good.  This  taught  me  the  abfolutc  depcr- 
 •dance  of  a  creature  upon  God  the  Creator,  for  every  crur  b 
 of  happinefs  it  enjoys.  Oh!  I  feel  that  if  there  is  no  God, 
 though  I  might  live  for  ever  here,  and  enjoy  not  only  this, 
 but  all  other  worlds,  I  fliould  be  ten  thouiand  times  more 
 raiferable  than  a  toad.  My  foul  was  in  fuch  anguiih  I  coukl 
 not  eat,  but  felt  as  I  fuppofed  a  poor  wretch  would  that  is 
 juft  going  to  the  place  of  execution.  I  v>  as  almoft  fv.-r.Uow  ed 
 up  with  anguifii,  when  I  faw  people  gathering  together  to 
 hear  rae  preach.     Hovvever,    I   went  in  that  diflrefs  to  the 
 
 H  houfe 
 
58  THELIFEOF  A.D.iy^^. 
 
 houfe  of  God,  and  found  not  much  relief  in  the  firft  prayer: 
 it  feemed  as  if  God  would  let  loofe  the  people  upon  rnc  to 
 deftroy  mc;  nor  were  the  thoughts  of  death  diftrefling  to  me, 
 r.ko  my  own  vilenefs.  But  afterwards  in  my  difcourfe  from 
 Deut.  viii.  2.  God  was  pleafcd  to  give  me  fome  freedom  and 
 cnlarj^cment,  fome  power  and  fpirituality ;  and  I  fpent  the 
 evening  fomcthing  comfortably. 
 
 [The  two  next  days,  his  comfort  continues,  and  he  fecms 
 to  enjoy  an  almolt  continual  fweetnefs  of  foul  in  the  duties 
 and  exercifes  of  religion  and  Chriftian  converfation.  On 
 Monday  was  a  return  of  the  gloom  he  had  been  under  the 
 Friday  before.  He  rode  to  Coventry  this  day,  and  the  latter 
 part  of  the  day  had  more  freedom.  On  Tuefday  he  rode  to 
 Canterbury,  and  continued  more  comfortable.] 
 
 Wedncfday,  January  19.  [At  Canterbury]  In  the  after- 
 noon preached  the  lefture  at  the  meeting-houfc :  felt  fome 
 tendernefs,  and  fomething  of  the  gofpel-temper :  exhorted 
 the  people  to  love  one  another,  and  not  to  {ti  up  their  own 
 frames  as  a  fbndard  to  try  all  their  brethren  by.  But  was 
 much  prelfed,  moft  of  the  day,  with  a  fcnfe  of  my  own  bad- 
 nefs,  inward  impurity,  and  unfpeakable  corruption.  Spent 
 the  evening  in  loving  Chriftian  converfation. 
 
 Thurfday,  January  2,0.  Rode  to  my  brother's  houfe  be- 
 tween Norwich  and  Lebanon  ;  and  preached  in  the  evening  to 
 a  number  of  people  :  enjoyed  neither  freedom  nor  fpirituality, 
 but  faw  myfelf  exceeding  unworthy. 
 
 Friday,  January  21.    Had  great  inward  conflicts;  enjoyed 
 
 '  but  little  comfort.     Went  to  fee  Mr  Williams  of  Lebanon, 
 
 and  fpent  feveral  hours  with  him;  and  was  greatly  delighted 
 
 with  his  ferious,  deliberate,  and  impartial  way  of  difcourfe  a- 
 
 bout  religion. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  was  much  dejefled.] 
 
 Lord's-day,  January  23.  Scarce  ever  felt  myfelf  fo  unlit  to 
 exift,  as  now:  I  faw  1  was  not  worthy  of  a  place  among  the 
 Indians,  where  I  am  going,  if  God  permit :  I  thought  I 
 ihouid  be  afhamed  to  look  them  in  the  face,  and  much  more 
 to  have  any  rcfpeft  fliewn  me  there.  Indeed  I  felt  myfelf 
 banifncd  from  the  earth,  as  if  all  places  were  too  good  for 
 fuch  a  wretch  as  I :  I  thought  I  lliould  be  afliamed  to  go  a- 
 mong  die   vciy  favages^  of  Africa  j    I  appeared  to  myfelf  a 
 
 creature 
 
Mt-iS'       ^  ^     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  59 
 
 creature  fit  for  nothing,  neither  heaven  nor  earth. None 
 
 knows,  but  thofe  that  feel  it,  what  the  foul  endures  that  is 
 fcnfibly  fliut  out  from  the  prefence  of  God:  alas  !  it  is  more 
 bitter  than  death. 
 
 £0n  Monday,  he  rode  to  Stoningtown,  ?*lr  Fifh's  parifh. 
 »  —On  Tuefday  he  exprefies  conliderable  degrees  of  fpiri- 
 tual  comfort  and  refrefhment.] 
 
 Wedncfday,  January  26.  Preached  to  a  pretty  large  afTem- 
 bly  at  Mr  Filh's  meeting-houfe :  infifted  on  humility,  and 
 ftcdfaftnefs  in  keeping  God's  commands ;  and  that  through 
 humility  we  fhiould  prefer  one  another  in  love,  and  not  make 
 our  own  frames  the  rule  by  which  we  judge  others.  I  felt 
 fweetly  calm,  and  full  of  brotherly  love ;  and  never  more 
 free  from  party-fpirit.  I  hope,  fome  good  will  follow,  that 
 Chriftians  will  be  freed  from  falfe  joy,  and  party-zeal,  and 
 cenfuring  one  another. 
 
 [On  Thurfday,  after  confiderable  time  fpent  in  prayer  and 
 Chriftian  converfation,  he  rode  to  In  ew-London.] 
 
 Friday,  January  28.  Here  I  found  fome  fallen  into  fome 
 extravagances,  too  much  carried  away  with  a  falfe  zeal  and 
 bitternefs.  Oh,  the  want  of  a  gofpel-temper  is  greatly  to  be 
 lamented.  Spent  the  evening  in  converfing  with  fome  about 
 fome  points  of  conduft  in  both  minillers  and  private  Chriftians ; 
 but  did  not  agree  with  them ;  God  had  not  taught  them  -with 
 iriars  and  thorns  to  be  of  a  kind  difpofition  toward  mankind. 
 
 [On  Saturday,  he  rode  to  Eaft-Haddam,  and  fpent  the 
 three  following  days  there ;  and  in  that  fpace  of  time  he  fpeaks 
 of  his  feeling  weanednefs  from  the  world,  x  fenfe  of  the 
 nearnefs  of  eternity,  fpecial  adiftance  in  praying  for  the  en- 
 largement of  Chrifl's  kingdom,  times  of  fpirituai  comfort, 
 6c.-} 
 
 Wednefday,  February  2.  Preached  my  farewell- fcrmon, 
 iafl  night,  at  the  houfe  of  an  aged  man,  who  had  been  unable 
 to  attend  on  the  public  worfhip  for  fome  time ;  and  this 
 morning  fpent  the  time  in  prayer,  almoft  where-ever  I  went; 
 and  having  taken  leave  of  friends,  I  fet  out  on  my  journey  to- 
 wards the  Indians  ;  though  by  the  w?y  I  was  to  fpend  fome 
 time  at   Eafl-Hampton  on  Long-Illand,  by  the  leave  of  the 
 
 H  2  commiifioners 
 
^o  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  r  J.  D.  lyA'i' 
 
 commiflioners  who  employed  mc  in  the  Indian  affair  * ;  and 
 bc:ing  accjuipan'ied  by  a  meflengcr  from  Eall-Hampton,  we 
 travelled  to  Lyrae.  On  the  road  I  felt  an  uncommon  prefTurc 
 of  mind  :  I.  fecmcd  to  rtiuggle  hard  for  fomc  pleafure  in  fome- 
 thing  here  below,  and  feemed  loth  to  give  up  all  for  gone  ; 
 but  then  favv'  myfelf  evidently  throwing  myfelf  into  all  hard- 
 iliips  and  diftreffes  in  my  prefent  undertaking  :  I  thought  it 
 Would  be  lefs  difnciilt  to  lie  down  in  the  grave  :  but  yet  I 
 chofc  to  go,  rather  than  ftay. Came  to  Lyme  that  night. 
 
 [He  waited  the  two  next  days  for  a  paffage  over  the  Sound, 
 and  fpent  much  of  the  time  in  inward  conflifts  and  dejeftion, 
 but  had  Ibme  comfort. 
 
 On  Saturday  he  cro/Ted  the  Sound,  landed  at  Oyfler-Ponds 
 on  Long-Ifland,  and  travelled  from  thence  to  Eaft-Hampton* 
 And  the  feven  following  days  he  fpent  there,  for  the  moft 
 part,  under  extreme  deieOion  and  gloominefs  of  mind,  with 
 great  complaints  of  darknef,  ignorance,  6c.  Yet  his  heart 
 appears  to  have  been  conflantly  engaged  in  the  great  bufmefs 
 of  religion,  much  concerned  for  the  interefl  of  religion  in 
 Eift-Harapton,  and  praying  and  labouring  much  for  it.] 
 
 Saturday,  February  12.  Enjoyed  a  little  more  comfort,  was 
 enabled  to  meditate  with  fome  compofure  of  mind;  andefpc- 
 cidly  in  the  evening,  found  my  foul  more  refrefhed  in  prayer, 
 thiin  at  any  time  of  late;  iry  foul  fcemed  to  "take  hold  of 
 ^'  God's  ftrength,"  and  was  comforted  with  his  confolations. 
 O  how  fweet  are  fome  glimpfes  of  divine  glory !  how 
 itre ngthening  and  quickening ! 
 
 Lord's  day,  February  13.  At  noon,  under  a  great  degree 
 of  difcouragement ;  knew  not  how  it  was  pofTible  for  me  to 
 preach  in  the  afternoon,  was  ready  to  give  up  all  for  gone ; 
 but  God  was  plcafed  to  affiil  me  in  fome  meafure.  In  the  e- 
 vcning,  my  heart  v/as  fvveeily  drawn  out  after  Gcd,  and  de- 
 voted to  him. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  had  comfort  and  dejection  intermin- 
 gled.] 
 
 *  The  reafon  why  the  commifTioners  or  correrpondents  did  not 
 order  Mr  Brainerd  to  go  immediately  to  the  Indians,  and  enter  on 
 his  bufsnefs  as  a  miffionary  to  them,  was,  that  the  lVs?iter  was  not 
 judged  to  be  a  convenient  feafop  for  him  firft  to  go  out  into  the 
 v/ridernefs,  and  enter  on  the  difficulties  and  hardPaips  he  Riuft  there 
 be  expofed  to. 
 
 Tuefday, 
 
jEt.2S'       M  R     D  A  V  I  D     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  6i 
 
 Tucfday,  February  15.  Early  in  the  day  I  felt  fome  com- 
 fort; afterwards  I  walked  into  a  neighbouring  grove,  and  felt 
 more  as  a  flranger  on  earth,  I  think,  than  ever  before  ;  dead 
 to  any  of  the  enjoyments  of  the  world,  as  if  I  had  been  dead 
 
 in  a  natural  fenfe. In  the  evening,  had  divine  fweetnefs  in 
 
 fecrct  duty  :  God  was  then  my  portion,  and  my  foul  role  a- 
 bove  thole  deep  rvaters,  into  which  I  have   funk  (o  low  of 
 
 late My  foul  then  cried  for  Zion,  and  had  fweetnefs  in  fo 
 
 doing. 
 
 [This  fweet  frame  continued  the  next  morning ;  but  after* 
 wards  his  inward  dillrefs  returned.] 
 
 Thurfday,  February  17.  In  the  morning,  found  myfelf 
 fomething  comfortable,  and  relied  on  God  in  fome  meaiure. 
 
 Preached  this  day  at  a  little  village  belonging  to   Eaft- 
 
 Hampton ;  and  God  was  pleafed  to  give  me  his  gracious  prefencc 
 and  affiftance,  fo  that  I  fpake  with  treedom,  boldnefs,  and  fome 
 power.  In  the  evening,  fpent  fome  time  with  a  dear  Chri- 
 flian  friend ;  felt  fweetly  lerious,  as  on  the  brink  of  eternity  ; 
 my  foul  enjoyed  fweetnefs  in  lively  apprehcnfions  of  Handing 
 before  the  glorious  God :  prayed  with  my  dear  friend  witk 
 fweetnefs,  and  difcourfed  with  utmoft  folemnity.     And  truly 
 
 it  was  a  little  emblem   of  heaven  itfelf. 1  find  my  foul  is 
 
 more  refined  and  weaned  from  a  dependance  on  my  frames  and 
 fpiritual  feelings. 
 
 Friday,  February  18.  Felt  fomething  fweetly  moft  of  the 
 day,  and  found  accefs  to  the  throne  of  grace.  BlelTed  be  the 
 Lord  for  any  intervals  of  heavenly  delight  and  compofure, 
 •while  I  am  engaged  in  the  field  of  battle.  O  that  I  might  be 
 fcrious,  folemn,  and  always  vigilant,  while  in  an  evil  world  ! 
 Had  fome  opportunity  alone  to-day,  and  found  fome  freedom 
 in  ftudy.     O,  I  long  to  live  to  Cod! 
 
 Saturday,  February  19.  Was  exceeding  infirm  to-day, 
 greatly  troubled  with  pain  in  my  head  and  dizzincfs,  fcarcc 
 able  to  fit  up.  However,  enjoyed  fomething  of  God  in  prayer, 
 and  performed  fome  necelfary  fiiudies.  I  exceedingly  long  to 
 die  ;  and  yet,  through  divine  goodnefs,  have  felt  very  willing 
 to  live,  for  two  or  three  days  paft. 
 
 Lord's  day,  February  20.  Was  fomething  perplexed  on  ac- 
 count of  my  carelelTnefs ;  I  thought  I  CvOuld  not  be  fuitably 
 concerned  about  the  important  work  of  the  day,  and  fo  was 
 reAleis  with  my  eafinefs. -Was  exceeding  infirm  again  to- 
 day ;  but  the  Lord  firengthened  m.e,  both  in  the  outward  and 
 inward  man.  fo  that  I  preached  with  fome  life  and  fpirituall- 
 
 ty. 
 
62  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F  jf.  D.  1743. 
 
 ty,  efpecially  in  the  afternoon,  wherein  I  was  enabled  to  fpeak 
 clofely  againft  felfifti  religion,  that  loves  Clirift  for  his  bene- 
 fits, but  not  for  himfelf. 
 
 [During  the  next  fortiijht,  it  appears  that  he,  for  the  moft 
 part,  enjoyed  much  fpiritual  peace  and  comfort.  In  his  dia- 
 ry for  this  fpace  of  time,  are  expreflcd  fuch  things  as  thefe ; 
 mourning  over  indwelling  fin  and  unprofitablenefs;  deadnefs 
 to  the  world  ;  longing  after  God,  and  to  live  to  his  glory ; 
 heart-melting  defires  after  his  eternal  home  ;  fixed  reliance  on 
 God  for  his  help ;  experience  of  much  divine  afUftance  both 
 in  the  private  and  public  exercifes  of  religion  ;  inward  ftrcngth 
 and  courage  in  the  lervice  of  God  ;  very  ftequent  refrtfliment, 
 confolation,  and  divine  fweetnefs  in  meditation,  prayer, 
 preaching,  and  Chriftian  converfation.  And  it  appears  by  hi* 
 account,  that  this  fpace  of  time  was  filled  up  with  great  dili- 
 gence and  earncftncfs  in  ferving  God,  in  ftudy,  prayer,  me- 
 ditation, preaching,  and  private  inftrucling  and  c«unlelling.] 
 
 Monday,  March  7.  This  morning  when  I  arofe,  I  found 
 my  heart  go  forth  after  God  in  longing  defires  of  conformity 
 to  him,  and  in  fecret  prayer  found  my  felf  fweetly  quickened 
 and  drawn  out  in  praifes  to  God  for  all  he  had  done  to  and 
 for  me,  and  for  all  my  inward  trials  and  diftrefles  of  late  ;  my 
 heart  afcribed  glory,  glory,  glory  to  the  blefled  God  !  and 
 bid  welcome  all  inward  diftrels  again,  if  God  faw  meet  to 
 exercife  me  with  it:  time  appeared  but  an  inch  long,  and  e- 
 ternity  at  hand;  and  I  thought  I  could  with  patience  and 
 chearfulnefs  bear  any  thing  for  the  caufe  of  God  ;  for  I  faw 
 that  a  moment  would  bring  me  to  a  world  of  peace  and  blefP 
 cdnefs  ;  and  my  foul,  by  the  flrength  of  the  Lord,  rofe  far 
 above  this  lower  world,  and  all  the  vain  amufements  and 
 frightful  difappointments  of  it.  Afterwards,  was  vifited 
 by  fome  friends,  but  loft  fome  fweetnefs  by  the  means. 
 After  that,  had  fome  fwcet  meditation  on  Gen.  v.  24.  "  And 
 
 "'  Enoch  walked  with  God,"  6<r. This  was  a  comfortable 
 
 day  to  my  foul. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  feems  to  have  continued  in  a  confider- 
 able  degree  of  fweetnefs  and  fervency  in  religion.] 
 
 Wednefday,  March  9.  Endeavoured  to  commit  myfelf  and 
 all  my  concerns  to  God.  Rode  fixteen  miles  to  Mantauk  *,  and 
 
 *  Mantauk  is  the  eaftern  cape  or  end  of  Long-Ifland,  inhabited 
 chiefly  by  Indians. 
 
 had 
 
MUis-       Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  63. 
 
 had  fome  inward  fweetnefs  on  the  road;  but  fomcthing  of 
 flatncfs  and  deadnefs  after  I  came  there  and  had  feen  the  In- 
 dians :  I  withdrew,  and  endeavoured  to  pray,  but  found  my- 
 felf  awfully  deferted  and  left,  and  had  an  alHidling  fenfe  of 
 my  vilenefs  and  meannefs.  However,  I  went  and  preached 
 from  If.  liii.  10.  Had  fome  affiftance  ;  and,  I  truft,  fome- 
 thing  of  the  divine  prefence  was  among  us.  In  the  evening, 
 again  I  prayed  and  exhorted  among  them,  after  having  had  a 
 feafon  alone,  wherein  I  was  fo  prefled  with  the  blacknefs  of 
 my  nature,  that  I  thought  it  was  not  fit  for  me  to  fpeak  fo 
 much  as  to  Indians. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  returned  to  Eaft-Hampton  ;  was  ex- 
 ceeding infi.m  in  body  through  the  remaining  part  of  this 
 week  ;  but  fpcaks  of  aiTiftance  and  enlargement  in  ftudy  and 
 religious  exercifes,  and  of  inward  fweetnefs  and  breathing 
 after  God.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  March  13.  At  noon,  I  thought  it  impoffible 
 for  me  to  preach,  by  reafon  of  bodily  weaknefs  and  inward 
 deadnefs ;  and  in  the  firft  prayer,  was  fo  weak  that  I  could 
 hardly  ftand ;  but  in  fermon,  God  ftrengthened  me,  fo  that 
 I  fpake  near  an  hour  and  half  with  fvveet  freedom,  dear- 
 nefs,  and  fome  tender  power,  from  Gen.  v.  24.  "  And  E- 
 "  noch  walked  with  God."  I  was  fweetly  alTifted  to  infifl 
 ©n  a  clofe  -walk  vjith  Cody  and  to  leave  this  as  my  parting  ad- 
 vice to  God's  people  here,  that  they  Jhould  walk  with  God, 
 May  the  God  of  all  grace  fucceed  my  poor  labours  in  this 
 place ! 
 
 Monday,  March  14.  In  the  morning,  was  very  bufy  In 
 preparation  for  my  journey,  and  was  almoit  continually  en- 
 gaged in  ejaculatory  prayer.  About  ten,  took  leave  of  the 
 dear  people  of  Kafl- Hampton ;  my  heart  grieved  and  mourn- 
 ed, and  rejoiced  at  the  fame  time;  rede  near  fifty  miles  to  2 
 part  of  Brook-Haven,  and  lodged  there,  and  had  refrefhing 
 converfation  with  a  Chriftian  friend. 
 
 [In  two  days  more  he  reached  New- York ;  but  complains 
 •f  much  defertion  and  deadnefs  on  the  road.  He  flayed  one 
 day  in  NcM'-York,  and  on  Friday  went  to  Mr  Dickin  Ton's  at 
 Elifabcth-Town.  His  complaints  are  the  fame  as  on  the  tw© 
 preceding  days.] 
 
 Saturday,  March  19.  Was  bitterly  diftrelTed  under  a  fenfe 
 •f  my  ignorance,  darknefs,  and  isnw«rthinefs ;  got  alone,  and 
 
 poured 
 
64  t  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  A.B.  1743, 
 
 poured  out  my  complaint  to    God  in  the   bitternefs   of  my 
 
 ibul. In  the  afternoon,    rode  to   Newark,    and  had  fornc 
 
 fweetncfs  in  converfation  with  Mr  Burr,  and  in  praying  to- 
 gether. O  blefled  be  God  for  ever  and  ever,  for  any  enliven- 
 ing and  quickening.  , 
 
 Lord's  day,  March  20.  Preached  in  the  forenoon :  God 
 gave  me  feme  affiftance  and  fweetnefs,  and  enabled  me  to 
 fpeak  with  real  tendernefs,  love,  and  impartiality.  In  the 
 evening,  preached  again ;  and,  of  a  truth,  God  was  pleafed 
 to  afTift  a  poor  worm.  BlefTed  be  God,  I  was  enabled  to 
 fpeak  with  life,  power,  and  palfionate  defire  of  the  edifica- 
 tion of  God's  people,  and  with  fome  power  to  finners.  In 
 the  evening,  I  felt  foraething  fpiritual  and  watchful,  left  my 
 heait  fhouid  by  any  means  be  drawn  away  from  God.  Oh, 
 when  (hall  I  come  to  that  blefled  world,  where  every  power 
 of  my  foul  will  be  incefl^antly  and  eternally  wound  up,  in 
 heavenly  employments  and  enjoyments,  to  the  higheft  de- 
 gree ! 
 
 [On  Monday  he  went  to  Woodbridgc,  where  he  fpeaks  of 
 his  being  with  a  number  of  minifters  *  ;  and  the  day  following 
 of  his  travelling  part  of  the  way  towards  New-York,  and 
 lodging  at  a  tavern.  On  VVednefday,  he  came  to  New- York. 
 On  Thurfday,  he  rode  near  fifty  miles,  from  New- York  to 
 North-Caftle.  On  Friday,  went  to  Danbury.  On  Saturday 
 to  New-Milford.  On  the  Sabbath,  he  rode  five  or  fix  miles  to 
 a  place  near  Kent  in   Connedicut,  called  Scaticoke,  where 
 
 *  Thefc  minifters  were  the  Correfpondents,  who  now  met  at 
 Woodbridgc,  and  gave  Mr  Brainerd  new  directions  ;  and  inftead 
 of  fending  him  to  the  Indians  at  the  Fork?  of  Delaware,  as  before 
 intended,  they  ordered  him  to  go  to  a  number  of  Indians,  at  Kau- 
 naumeek,  a  place  in  the  province  of  New- York,  in  the  woods  be- 
 tween Stockbridge  and  Albany.  This  alteration  was  occasioned 
 by  two  things,  viz.  i.  Information  that  the  correfpondents  had  re- 
 ceived of  fome  contention  now  fubfifting  between  the  white  people 
 and  the  Indians  at  Delaware,  concerning  their  lands,  which  they 
 fuppofed  would  be  a  hinderance  at  prefent  to  their  entertainment  of 
 a  miflionary,  and  to  his  fuccefs  among  them.  And,  2.  Some  inti- 
 mations they  had  received  from  Mr  Sergeant,  miffionary  to  the  In- 
 dians at  Stockbridge,  concerning  the  Indians  at  Kaunaumeek,  and 
 the  hopeful  profped  of  fuccefs  that  a  miflionary  might  have  among 
 them. 
 
 dwell 
 
At.  25.         Mr    DAVID     BRAINERD.  65 
 
 dwell  a  number  of  Indians  *,  and  preached  to  them.  On 
 Monday,  being  detained  by  the  rain,  he  tarried  at  Kent.  On 
 Tucfday,  he  rode  from  Kent  to  Sallbury.  Wednefday,  he 
 went  to  Sheffield.  Thurfday,  March  31.  he  went  to  Mr 
 Sergeant's  at  Stockbridge.  He  was  dejeftcd  and  very  difcon- 
 folate,  through  the  main  of  this  journey  from  New-Jcrfey 
 to  Stockbridge  ;  and  efpccially  on  the  laft  day  his  mind  was 
 overwhelmed  with  an  exceeding  gloominefs  and  melancho- 
 
 ly-] 
 
 *  Thefe  were  the  fame  Indians  that  Mr  Brainerd  mentions  in  his 
 diary,  on  Auguft  12.  the  preceding  year. 
 
 PART 
 
PART       V. 
 
 From  his  firfl:  beginning  to  inftnicfl  the  Indians 
 at  Kaunaumeek,  to  his  Ordinat'iBn. 
 
 FRiday,  April  k  1743.  I  rode  to  Kaunaumeek,  near 
 twenty  miles  from  Stockbridge,  where  tiie  Indians  live, 
 with  whom  I  am  concerned,  and  there  lodged  on  a  little 
 heap  oF  llraw :  was  greatly  exercifcd  with  inward  trials  and 
 diftrelFes  all  day ;  and  in  the  evening,  my  heart  was  funk,  and 
 I  feemed  to  have  no  God  to  go  to.  O  that  God  would  help 
 me  I 
 
 [The  next  five  days,  he  was  for  the  mofl:  part  in  a  dejefted 
 deprefled  Hate  of  mind,  and  fonietimes  extremely  fo.  He 
 fpeaks  of  God's  "  waves  and  billows  rolling  over  his  foul ;" 
 and  of  his  being  ready  fometimes  to  fay,  "  Surely  his  mercy 
 "  is  clean  gone  for  ever,  and  he  will  be  favourable  no  more  ;" 
 and  fays,  the  anguifh  he  endured,  was  namelefs  and  inconcei- 
 vable :  but  at  the  fame  time  fpeaks  thus  concerning  his  di-- 
 llreffes,  "  What  God  dcfigns  by  all  my  diftrefles  I  know  not ; 
 **  but  this'U  know,  I  deferve  them  all,  and  thoufands  more." 
 
 He  gives   an  account  of  the    Indians   kindly   receiving 
 
 him,  and  being  fsrioufly  attentive  to  his  infirmftions.] 
 
 Thurfday,  April  7.  Appeared  to  myfelf  exceeding  ignorant, 
 weak,  helplefs,  and  unworthy,  and  altogether  unequal  to  m.y 
 work.  It  feemed  to  me,  I  (hould  never  do  any  fervice,  or 
 have  any  fuccefs  among  the  Indians.  My  foul  was  weary  of 
 ray  life:  I  longed  for  death,  beyond  meafure.  When  I 
 thought  of  any  godly  fonl  departed,  my  foul  was  ready  to  en- 
 vy him  his  privilege,  thinking,  "  Gh,  when  will  my  turn 
 **  cornel  muft  it  be  years  firfl; !" But  I  know,  thcfe  ar- 
 dent dcfues,  at  this  and  other  times,  rofe  partly  for  want  of 
 refignation  to  God  under  all  miferies;  and  lb  were  but  impa- 
 tience. Towards  night,  I  had  (I  think)  the  exercife  of  faith 
 in  prayer,  and  feme  afiiftance  in  writing.  O  that  God  would 
 keep  mc  near  him  1 
 
 Fridav. 
 
Mt.is-         M  R    D  A  V  I  D     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  67 
 
 Friday,  April  8.  Was  exceedingly  prefied  under  a  fenfe  of 
 my  pride,  felfifhnefs^  bitternefsy  znd  party-fpirit,  in  times  part, 
 while  I  attempted  to  promote  the  caufe  of  God :  its  vile  na- 
 ture and  dreadful  confequenccs  appeared  in  fuch  odious  co- 
 lours to  me,  that  my  very  heart  was  pained  :  1  faw  how  poor 
 fouls  Humbled  over  it  into  everlafting  deftruftion,  that  I  was 
 conftraincd  to  make  that  prayer  in  the  bitternefs  of  my  foul, 
 "  O  Lord,  deliver  me  from  blood-guiltinefs."  I  faw  mydefert 
 of  hell  ou  this  account.  My  foul  was  full  of  inward  anguilh 
 and  fhame  before  God,  that  I  had  fpent  fo  much  tune  in  con- 
 verfation  tending  only  to  promote  a  party-fpirit.  Oh,  I  faw 
 I  had  not  fuitably  piized  mortification,  lelf-denial,  refigna- 
 tion  under  all  adverfities,  mecknefs,  love,  candour,  and  hoii- 
 nefs  of  heart  and  life  :  and  this  day  was  almo If  wholly  fpent 
 in  fuch  bitter  and  foul-alfiifting  reflexions  on  my  paft  frames 
 
 and  conducSl. Of  late,  I  have  thought  much  of  having  the 
 
 kingdom  of  Chrift  advanced  in  the  world ;  but  now  I  faw  1  had 
 enough  to  do  within  myfelf.  The  Lord  be  merciful  to  me  a 
 linner,  and  wafli  my  foul ! 
 
 Saturday,  April  9.  Remained  much  in  the  fame  ftate  as 
 yefterday ;  excepting  that  the  fenfe  of  ray  vilenefs  was  not  fo 
 quick  and  acute. 
 
 Lord's  day,  April  10.  Rofe  early  in  the  morning,  and 
 walked  out,  and  fpent  confiderable  time  in  the  woods,  in 
 prayer  and  meditation.  Preached  to  the  Indians,  both  fore- 
 noon and  afternoon.  They  behaved  foberly  in  general :  two 
 or  three  in  particular  appeared  under  fome  religious  concern ; 
 with  whom  I  difcourled  privately ;  and  one  told  me,  *'  her 
 *'  heart  had  cried,  tf\'er  fmce  fhe  heard  me  preach  firft." 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  complains  of  much  dcfertion.] 
 
 Tuefday,  April  12.  Was  greatly  opprefTed  with  grief  and 
 fhame,  reflecting  on  my  paft  conduct,  my  bitternefs  znd  party- 
 zeal.  I  was  afhamed,  to  think  that  fuch  a  wretch  as  I  had  ever 
 preached. — Longed  to  be  excufed  from-  that  work.  And 
 when  my  foul  was  not  in  anguifli  and  keen  diftrefs,  I  felt 
 fenfelefs  "  as  a  beaft  before  God,"  and  felt  a  kind  of  guilty  a- 
 mufement  with  the  leaft:  trifles ;  which  ftili  maintained  a  kind 
 of  ftifled  horror  of  confcience,  fo  that  I  could  not  reft  any 
 more  than  a  condemned  malefaftor. 
 
 A\''ednefday,  April  13.  My  heart  was  overwhelmed  within 
 me  :  I  verily  thought  I  was  the  meaneft,  vileft,  moft  helplefs, 
 guilty,  ignorant,  benighted  creature  living.  And  yet  I  knew 
 what  God  had  done  for  my  foul,  at  the  fame  tim.e :  though 
 
 I  2  fome  times 
 
68  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F  A.l>.  1745. 
 
 fometimes  I  was  aflaulted  with  damping  doubts  and  fears, 
 whether  it  was  poflible  tor  fuch  a  wretch  as  I  to  be  in  a  ftate 
 oi"  grace.    • 
 
 Thurfday,  April  14.  Remdned  much  in  the  fame  ftate  as 
 ycfterday. 
 
 •  Friday,  x'Vpril  i<;.  In  the  forenoon,  very  difconfolate.  In 
 the  afternoon,  preached  to  my  pe*  pie,  and  was  a  little  encou- 
 raged in  fome  hopes  God  might  bellow  mercy  on  their  fouls. 
 
 ■ '•Felt  fomething  religned  to  God  under  all  dilpenfations 
 
 of  his  providence. 
 
 Saturday,  April  16.   Still  in  the  depths  of  diftrefs. In 
 
 the  afternoon,  preached  to  my  people  ;  but  was  more  difcou- 
 raged  with  them  than  before  ;  feared  that  nothing  would  ever 
 be  done  for  them  to  any  happy  eifeft.  I  retired  and  poured 
 out  my  foul  to  God  for  mercy  ;  but  without  any  fenfible  re- 
 lief. Soon  after  came  an  Iriih-man  and  a  Dutch-man,  with  a 
 defign,  as  they  faid,  to  hear  me  preach  the  next  day  ;  but 
 none  can  tell  how  1  felt,  to  hear  their  profane  talk.  Oh,  I 
 longed  that  fome  dear  Chrifrian  knew  my  diftrefs.  I  got  into 
 a  kmd  of  hovel,  and  there  groned  cut  my  complaint  to  God  ; 
 and  withal  felt  more  feniible  gratitude  and  thankfulnefs  to 
 God,  that  he  had  made  m.e  to  differ  from  thele  men,  as  I 
 knew  through  grace  he  had. 
 
 Lord's  day,  April  17.  In  the  morning  w'as  again  diflreffed 
 2S  foon  as  I  waked,  hearing  much  talk  about  the  world  and 
 the  things  of  it.  Though  1  perceived  the  men  were  in  lome 
 meafure  afraid  of  me;  and  I  difcourfed  fomething  about  fanc- 
 tifying  the  Sabbath,  if  polLble.  to  folemnize  their  minds; 
 but  when  they  were  at  a  little  diftance,  they  again  talked  free- 
 ly about  iecrlar  affairs.  Oh,  I  thought  wi.at  a  htll  it  would 
 be,  to  live  with  fuch  men  to  eternity!  The  Lord  gave  me 
 fume  affiftance  in  preaching,  all  day,  and  fome  refignation, 
 and  a  fmaii  degree  of  comfort  in  prayer  at  night. 
 
 [Ke  continued  in  this  c^fconfolate  frame  the  next  day.] 
 
 Tuefday,  April  19.  In  the  morning,  enjoyed  fom.e  fweet 
 repofe  and  reft  in  God  ;  felt  fome  flrength  and  confidence  in 
 God;  and  m.y  foul  was  in  foff-.e  meafure  refrefr.ed  and  com- 
 f^itcd.  Spent  mofl:  of  the  day  in  writing,  and  had  fome  ex- 
 ercife  of  grace  fenfible  and  comfortable  :  my  foul  feemed  lifted 
 above  the  deep  "waters,  wherein  it  f.as  been  fo  long  almcft 
 diov.ned;  felt  fome  ipiiltuai  longings  and  breathings  of  foul 
 alter  God;  found  myielf  engaged  f^or  the   advancement   of 
 
 Chxift's 
 
JEt.iS.        Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  6y 
 
 Chrift's  kingdom  in  my  own  foul,  more  than  in  others,  more 
 than  in  the  Heathen  world. 
 
 Wedn,.'rday,  April  20.  Set  apart  this  day  for  fading  and 
 prayer,  to  bjw  my  foul  before  God  for  the  beftowment  of 
 divine  grace ;  efpecially  that  all  my  fpiritual  afflictions  and 
 in  .vard  diftreffes  might  be  fanctified  to  my  foul.  And  endea- 
 voured alio  t  J  remember  the  goodnefs  of  God  to  me  in  the 
 yeir  part,  this  day  being  m.y  birtl>day.  Having  obtained 
 help  oi  God,  1  have  hitherto  lived,  and  am  now  arrived  at  the 
 age  o(  twenty-five  years.  ]\Iy  foul  was  pained,  to  think  of 
 my  barrenneis  and  dcadne^s;  that  I  have  lived  fo  little  to  the 
 gl  uy  of  the  eternal  God.  I  fpent  the  day  in  the  woods  a- 
 li^ne.  and  there  poured  out  my  complaint  to  God.  O  that 
 God  would  <^nable  me  to  live  to  hi^  glory  for  the  future ! 
 
 Thurfday,  April  21.  Spent  the  forenoon  in  reading  and 
 prayer,  and  found  myfeif  fomething  engaged;  but  Hi il  much 
 aepre/Ted  in  fpirit  under  a  {c%{e  of  ray  vilencfs  and  ur.fitnefs 
 for  any  public  lervice.  In  the  afternoon,  I  vifited  my  people, 
 and  prayed  and  converled  v.ith  forae  ab^ut  their  fouls 
 concerns :  and  afterwaids  found  fome  ardour  of  foul  in 
 fecret  praver.  O  that  I  might  grow  up  into  the  likencfs  of 
 God! 
 
 Friday,  April  12.  Spent  the  day  in  ftudy,  reading,  and 
 prayer ;  and  felt  a  little  relieved  of  my  burden,  that  has  been 
 fo  hea\'y  of  late.  But  ftill  in  fome  meafure  opprefled  :  had  a 
 fenfe  of  barrennefs.  Oh  my  leannefs  teflifies  againft  me! 
 my  very  foul  abhors  itfelf  for  its  unlikenefs  to  God,  its 
 iaaclivity  and  lluggifhnefs.  When  I  have  done  all,  alas, 
 what  an  unprofitable  fervant  am  I !  IMy  fcul  grones,  to  fee 
 the  hours  of  the  day  roll  away,  becaufe  I  do  not  fill  them, 
 in  fpirituality  and  heavenly-mindednefs.  And  )-et  I  long  they 
 fhould  fpeed  their  pace,  to  haften  me  to  my  eternal  home, 
 where  I  may  fill  up  all  my  moments,  through  eternity,  for 
 God  and  his  g^ory. 
 
 [On  Saturday  and  LcrcTs  day,  his  melancholy  again  pre- 
 vailed :  he  cried  out  of  his  ignorance,  ftupidity,  and  fenfeleff 
 nefs;  while  yet  he  feems  to  have  fpent  tne  time  with  utmoft 
 diligence,  in  find;/,  in  prayer,  and  in  inflrucring  and  counfel- 
 ling  the  Indians.  On  Monday,  he  funk  into  the  deepefr 
 melancholy  ;  fo  that  he  fuppjfed  he  never  fpent  a  day  in  iuch 
 diftrefs  in  his  life;  not  in  fears  of  hell,  (v.hich,  he  fays,  he 
 had  no  preffing  fear  of),  but  a  difirefling  fenfe  of  his  ov.n  vile- 
 nefs,  ec.  On  Tuefday,  he  expreiTes  fome  relief.  A^^'cdnel^ 
 ^ay  he  kept  as  a  dav  of  fafting  and  praver,  but  Ie  great  di- 
 
 ^  flrefs. 
 
^o  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  A.D.  1743, 
 
 flrefs.  The  three  days  next  following,  his  melancholy  con- 
 tinued, but  in  a  lefler  degree,  and  with  intervals  of  com- 
 fort ".] 
 
 Lord's  day,  May  i.  "Was  at  Stockbridge  to-day.  In  the 
 forenoon  had  fome  relief  and  afliftance  ;  though  not  fo  much 
 as  ufual.  In  the  afternoon,  felt  poorly  in  body  and  foul; 
 "while  I  was  preaching,  feemed  to  be  rehearfing  idle  tales, 
 ■without  the  leaft  life,  fervour,  fenfe,  or  comfort :  and  efpe- 
 cially  afterwards,  at  the  facrament,  my  foul  was  filled  with 
 confufion,  and  the  utmofl  anguih  that  ever  I  endured,  under 
 the  feeling  of  ray  inexpreflible  vilenefs  and  meannefs.  It 
 was  a  moft  bitter  and  diflreffing  feafon  to  me,  by  reafon  of 
 the  view  I  had  of  my  own  heart,  and  the  fecret  abominations 
 that  lurk  there:  I  thought  the  eyes  of  all  in  the  houfe  were 
 upon  me,  and  1  dared  not  look  any  one  in  the  face ;  for  it 
 verily  feemed  as  if  they  faw  the  vilenefs  of  my  heart,  and 
 all  the  fins  I  had  ever  been  guilty  of.  And  if  1  had  been 
 baniflied  from  the  prefence  of  all  mankind,  never  to  be  fcen 
 any  more,  or  {o  much  as  thought  of,  fiill  I  fhould  have  been 
 difireiTed  with  fhame ;  and  I  iTiould  have  been  afhamed  to  fee 
 the  neofi:  barbarous  people  on  eai  th,  becaufe.  I  was  viler,  and 
 feemlngly  more  brutifhly  ignorant  than  thcy.~"  I  am  made  to 
 "  poffefs  the  fins  of  my  youth." 
 
 [The  remaining  days  of  this  week  were  fpent,  for  the 
 rnoflpart,  in  inward  diftrefs  and  gloominefs.  The  next  Sab- 
 bath, he  had  encouragement,  affiftance,  and  comfort;  but 
 on  Monday  funk  again.] 
 
 Tuefday,  May  10.  Was  in  the  fam.e  flate,  as  to  my  mlnd^ 
 that  I  have  been  in  for  fome  time,  extremely  preffed  with  ^ 
 fenfe  of  guilt,  pollution,  blindnefs :  "  The  iniquity  of  my 
 *'  heels  have  cornpafTed  me  about;  the  fins  of  my  youth  have 
 ''  been  fet  in  order  before  me  ;  they  have  gene  over  my  head, 
 *'  as  an  heavy  burden,  too  heavy  for  me  to  bear."  Almoft  all 
 the  aftions  of  my  life  paft  feem  to  be  covered  over  with  fin 
 and  guilt;  and  tliofe  of  them  that  I  performed  in  the  moft 
 confcientious  manner,  now  fill  me  with  fhame  and  confufion, 
 that  I  cannot  hold  up  my  face.  Oh  !  the  pride ^  fclffinefs, 
 hypocrify,  ignorance,  hitternefs,  party-zeal,  and  the  vjant  of 
 love,  candour,  meeknejs,  and  gentltnefs,  that  have  attended  my 
 
 *  On  the  l?.il  of  thefe  days  he  wrote  x.h.t  frji  letter  added  at  the 
 end  of  this  hi(icry. 
 
 attempt^ 
 
if/.  a6.      Mr    DAVID     BRAINERD.  71 
 
 attempts  to  promote  religion  and  virtue ;  and  this  when  I 
 have  reafon  to  hope  I  had  real  afiiftance  from  above,  and  fome 
 fweet  intercourfe  with  Heaven !  But,  alas,  what  corrupt  mix- 
 tures attended  my  beft  duties ! 
 
 [The  next  feven  days,  his  gloom  and  diftrefs  continued, 
 for  the  moft  part :  but  he  had  Tome  turns  of  relief  and  fpiri- 
 tual  comfort.  He  gives  an  account  of  his  fpending  part  of 
 this  time  in  hard  labour,  to  build  himfelf  a  little  cottage  to 
 live  in  araongft  the  Indians,  in  which  he  might  be  by  himfelf; 
 havincr  (it  feeras)  hitherto  lived  with  a  poor  Scotch-man,  as 
 he  obferves  in  the  letter  juft  now  refered  to  in  the  margin  ; 
 and  afterwards,  before  his  own  houfe  was  habitable,  lived  in 
 a  wigwam  among  the  Indians.] 
 
 Wednefday,  May  18.  My  circumilances  are  fuch  that  I 
 have  no  comfort,  of  any  kind,  but  what  1  have  in  God.  I 
 live  in  the  moft  lonefome  wildernefs ;  have  but  one  lingle  per- 
 fon  to  converfe  v.'ith,  that  can  fpeak  EngliOi  *.  Mod  of  the 
 talk  I  hear,  is  either  Highland- Scotch  or  Indian.  I  have  no 
 fellow- Chriftan  to  whom  I  might  unbofom  myfelf,  and  lay 
 •pen  my  fpiritual  forrows,  and  with  whom  I  might  take 
 fweet  counfel  in  converfation  about  heavenly  things,  and  join 
 in  focial  prayer.  I  live  poorly  with  regard  to  the  comforts  of 
 life :  moft  of  my  diet  confife  of  boiled  corn,  hafty-pudding, 
 ^c.  I  lodge  on  a  bundle  of  ftraw,  and  my  labour  is  hard  and 
 extremely  difficult;  and  I  have  little  appearance  of  fuccefs, 
 to  comfort  me.  The  Indians  aifairs  are  very  difficult; 
 having  no  land  to  live  on,  but  v^hat  the  Dutch  people  lay  claim 
 to,  and  threaten  to  drive  them  oiF from;  they  have  no  re- 
 gard to  the  fouls  of  the  poor  Indians  ;  and,  by  what  I  can  learn, 
 
 they  hate   me,  becaufe    I   come  to  preach  to  them. Buu 
 
 that  which  makes  all  my  difficulties  grievous  to  be  borne,  is, 
 that  "  God  hides  his  face  from  me." 
 
 Thurfday,  May  19.  Spent  moft  of  this  day  in  clofe  ftudies: 
 but  was  fometimes  fo  diftreffed  that  I  could  think  of  nothing 
 fcut  my    fpiritual  blindnefs,    ignorance,    pride,    and  mifery. 
 
 *  This  perfon  was  Mr  Bralncrd's  interpreter ;  who  was  an  in- 
 gCDious,  young  Indian  belonging  to  Stockbridge,  whofe  name  was 
 John  WauwaU'Tipequunnaunt,  who  had  been  inftrucfted  in  the 
 Chrillian  religion  by  Mr  Sergeant ;  and  had  lived  with  the  Reve- 
 rend Mr  Williams  of  Long-  Meadow,  and  had  been  further  inflrudeil 
 by  him,  at  the  charge  of  Mr  Hollis  of  London ;  and  underllood 
 ioth  Engliih  and  Jndiau  very  v/ell,  and  wrote  a  good  hand. 
 
 Oh, 
 
7i  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  Ji.  D.  1743. 
 
 Oh,  T  have  reafon  to  make  that  prayer,  "  Lord,  forgive  my 
 **  fins  of  youth,  and  former  trefpalFesI" 
 
 Friday,  May  20.  Was  much  perplexed,  feme  part  of  the 
 day;  but  towards  night,  had  fome  comfortable  meditations 
 on  If,  xi.  I.  and  enjoyed  fome  fweetnefs  in  prayer.  After- 
 wards my  foul  rofe  fo  far  above  the  deep  -waters,  that  I  dared 
 to  rejoice  in  God:  J  faw,  there  was  fufficient  matter  of  con- 
 folation  in  the  blelTcd  God. 
 
 [The  next  nine  days,  his  burdens  were  for  the  moft  part 
 alleviated,  but  with  variety ;  at  fome  times  having  confider- 
 able  confolation,  and  at  other  times  more  deprelfed.  The 
 next  day,  Monday,  May  30.  he  ^et  out  on  a  journey  to 
 New-Jcrfey,  to  conlult  the  commiifioners  that  employed  him 
 about  the  arFairs  of  his  miflion  *  :  performed  his  journey 
 thither  in  four  days  ;  and  anived  at  Mr  Burr's  in  Newark  on 
 Thurfday.  In  great  part  of  his  journey,  he  was  in  the  depths 
 of  melancholy,  un'uer  like  diftreffes  with  thofe  already  men- 
 tioned. On  Friday,  he  rode  to  Elilabeth-Town ;  and  on 
 Satuvday  to  New- York ;  and  from  thence  on  his  way  home- 
 wards as  far  as  White-Plains ;  where  he  fpent  the  Sabbath, 
 and  had  confiderable  degrees  of  divine  confolation  and  affift- 
 ance  in  public  fervices.  On  Monday,  he  rode  about  fixty 
 miles  to  New-Haven.  There  he  attempted  a  reconciliation  with 
 the  authority  of  the  college  ;  and  fpent  this  week  in  vifiting  his 
 friends  in  thofe  parts,  and  in  his  journey  homewards,  till 
 Saturday,  in  a  pretty  comfortable  frame  of  mind.  On  Satur- 
 day, in  his  way  from  Stockbridge  to  Kaunaumeck,  he  was 
 loft  in  the  woods,  and  lay  all  night  in  the  open  air  ;  but  hap- 
 pily found  his  way  in  the  morning,  and  came  to  his  Indians 
 on  Lord's  day,  June  12.  and  had  greater  affiftance  in  preach- 
 ing among  them  than  ever  before,  fince  his  firft  coming 
 among  them.] 
 
 [From  this  time  forward  he  was  the  fubjed  of  various 
 frames  and  exercifes  of  mind :  but  it  feems,  in  the  general, 
 to  have  been  with  him  much  after  the  fame  manner  as  it  had 
 been  hitherto  from  his  firft  coming  to  Kaunaumeek,  till  he 
 got  into  his  own  houfe,  (a  little  hut,  that  he  made  chiefly 
 with  his  own  hands,  with  long  and  hard  labour),  which  was 
 
 *  His  bufinefs  with  the  commiffioners  now  was,  to  obtain  erders 
 from  them  to  fet  up  a  fchool  among  the  Indians  at  Kaunaumeek, 
 and  that  his  interpreter  might  be  appointed  the  fchoolmafter  : 
 which  was  accordingly  done, 
 
 near 
 
^/.  ad-.       M  R     D  A  V  T  D     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  73 
 
 Hear  feven  weeks  from  this  time.  Great  part  of  this  fpace  of 
 time,  he  was  dejefted  and  deprefTed  with  melancholy,  and 
 fometimes  very  extremely,  his  melancholy  operating  in 
 like  manner  as  has  been  related  of  times  palt.  How  it  was 
 with  him  in  thofe  dark  feafons,  he  himfeif  further  de- 
 fcribes  in  his  diary  for  July  1.  in  the  following  manner.  "  Aiy 
 "  foul  is,  and  has  for  a  long  time  been  in  a  piteous  condition, 
 "  wading  through  a  feries  of.  forrows,  of  various  kinds.  I 
 "  have  been  io  crufhed  down  fometimes  with  a  fenfe  of  my 
 *'  meannefs  and  infinite  vmworthinefs,  that  I  have  been  a- 
 "  fhamed  that  any,  even  the  meaneft  of  my  fellow-creatures, 
 "  fhould  fo  much  as  fpend  a  thought  about  me,  and  have 
 *'  wiflied  fometimes  whiie  I  have  travelled  among  the  thick 
 *'  brakes,  as  one  of  them,  to  drop  into  eveiiafling  oblivion. 
 '*  In  this  cafe,  fometim.es,  I  have  almoft:  refolved  sever  again 
 **  to  fee  any  of  my  acquaintance  ;  and  really  thought,  I  cculd 
 *'  not  do  it  and  hold  up  my  face ;  and  have  longed  for  the  re- 
 *"'  moteft  region,  for  a  retreat  from  all  my   friends,  that  I 
 
 "  might  not  be  feen  or  heard  of  any  more. Sometimes 
 
 ''  the  confideration  of  my  ignorance  has  been  a  m.eans  of  my 
 "  great  difrrefs  and  anxiety.  And  efpecialiy  my  foul  has 
 "  been  in  anguifh  with  fear,  fhame,  and  guilt,  that  ever  I  had 
 
 "  preached,  or  had  any  thought  that  way. Somctim.es  my 
 
 "  foul  has  been  in  diflrefs  on  feeling  fome  particular  corrup- 
 "  tions  rife  and  fwell  like  a  mighty  torrent,  with  prefent  vio- 
 '-  Icnce ;  having,  at  the  fame  time,  ten  thoufand  former  fins 
 "  and  follies  prefented  to  view,  in  all  their  hlacknefs  and  ag- 
 
 **  gravations. And  thefe  attended  with  fuch  external  cir- 
 
 *Vcumn:ances  as  m.ine  at  prefent  are  ;  dcflitute  of  mofl  of  the 
 *'  conveniencies  of  life,  and  I  m.ay  fay,  of  all  the  pleafures  of 
 ^'  it;  without  a  friend  to  communicate  any  of  my  forrows  to, 
 "  and  fometimes  without  any  place  of  retirement,  where  I 
 "  may  unburden  my  foul  before  God,  v/hich  has  greatly  con- 
 
 "  tributed   to   my  diflrefs. Of  late,  m.ore  efpecialhv,  my 
 
 "  great  difficulty  has  been  a  fort  of  careleffnefs,  a  kind  of 
 "  regardlefs  temper  of  mind,  whence  I  have  been  difpofed  to 
 "  indolence  and  trifling:  and  this  temper  of  mind  has  ccn- 
 "  ftantly  been  attended  with  guilt  and  fhame;  fo  that  fom.e- 
 "  times  I  have  been  in  a  kind  of  horror,  to  find  myfelf  fo  un- 
 '•  like  the  bleiTed  God  ;  and  have  ihought  I  grew  worfe  under 
 *'  all  my  trials;  and  nothing  has  cut  and  wcunded  my  foul 
 *'  more  than  this.  Oh,  If  I  am  one  of  God's  chofc-n,  as  I 
 "  truft  through  infinite  grace  I  am,  I  ^xtA  of  a  truth,  that  ihe 
 "  right  sous  are  fcarce'y  favea." 
 
 It  is  apparent,  that  one  main  occaHon  of  that  dirrreffin'^ 
 
 K  ELi^'.nr/niels 
 
74  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  J.  D.  1743. 
 
 gloominefs  of  mind  which  he  was  fo  much  exercifed  with  at 
 Kaunaumeek,  was  refieftion  on  his  paft  errors  rvnd  mifguided 
 zeal  at  college,  in  tiie  beginning  of  the  late  religious  commo- 
 tioni  in  the  land.  And  therefore  he  repeated  his  endeavours 
 this  year  for  reconciliiition  with  the  governors  of  the  college, 
 whom  he  had  in  that  time  titFended.  Although  he  had  been 
 at  New-Haven,  in  June,  this  year,  and  had  atten^pted  a  re- 
 conciliation, as  has  been  mentioned  already ;  yet,  in  the  be- 
 ginning of  July,  he  made  another  journey  thither,  and  re- 
 newed his  attempt,  bat  ftlil  in  vain. 
 
 Although  he  \\':-s  much  dejecfted,  great  part  of  that  fpace  of 
 time  tliat  I  am  now  fpeaklng  of;  yet  there  were  many  inter- 
 raiflions  of  his  melancholy,  and  fome  feafons  of  comfort, 
 fwcet  tianquiility  and  refignation  of  mind,  and  frequent  fpe- 
 cial  affiilance  in  public  fervices,  that  he  fpcaks  of  in  his  diary. 
 The  manner  of  his  relief  from  his  forrow,  once  in  particular, 
 is  wonhy  to  be  mentioned  in  his  own  words,  in  his  diary  for' 
 July  25.  which  are  as  follows.  "  Had  little  or  no  refolution 
 "  for  a  life  of  holinefs ;  was  ready  almoft  to  renounce  my 
 *'  hopes  of  living  to  God.  And  Oh  how  dark  it  looked,  to 
 "  think  of  being  unholy  for  ever!  This  I  could  not  endure. 
 "  The  cry  of  my  foul  was  that,  Pfal.  Ixv.  3.  Iniquities  pre- 
 *'  vail  again/}  me.  But  was  in  fome  meafure  relieved  by  a 
 *'  comfortable  meditation  on  God's  eternity,  that  he  never 
 *'  had  a  beginning,  <bc.  Whence  I  was  led  to  admire  his 
 *'  greatnefs  and  power,  6c.  in  fuch  a  manner,  that  I  flood 
 **  Hill,  and  praifed  the  Lord  for  his  own  glories  and  perfec- 
 *'  tions;  though  I  was  (and  if  I  fhould  for  ever  be)  an  unholy 
 '*  creature,  my  foul  was  comforted  to  apprehend  an  eternal, 
 "  infinite,  powerful,  holy  God."3 
 
 Saturday,  July  30.  Jufl  at  night,  moved  into  my  oiv»  houfe, 
 and  lodged  there  that  night;  tu^nd  it  much  better  fpending. 
 the  time  alone  in  my  own  houfe,  than  in  the  wigivam  where  I 
 was  before. 
 
 Lord's  day,  July  31.    Felt  more  comfortably  than  fome 
 
 days  pad. Blefled  be  the  Lord,  that  has  now  given  me  a 
 
 place  of  retirement. O  that  I  might  fnd  Cod  in  it,  and 
 
 that  he  would  dwell  with  me  for  ever ! 
 
 Mondcij/,  A'.iguft  I.  Was  fall  bufy  in  further  labours  on  my 
 houfe. — Felt  a  little  of  the  fv."-etnels  of  religion,  and  thought 
 it  v.'as  v/orth  the  wlille  to  folloiv  c.fter  Cod  through  a  thoufancj 
 foai-es,  defarts,  and  death  itfelf.  O  that  \  might  always/'j/- 
 hvj  after  holinefs,  that  I  may  be  fully  conformed  to  God !  Had 
 
 fome 
 
iE^26.      Mr    D  A  VID     BR  AIN  ERD.  75 
 
 fome  degree  of  fweetnefs,  in  feciet  prayer,  though  I  had 
 much  forrow. 
 
 Tuefday,  Augufl:  2.  Was  ftill  labcluring  to  make  myfelf 
 more  comfortable  with  regard  to  my  houfc  and  lodging.  La- 
 boured under  Ipiritual  anxiety ;  it  Teemed  to  me,  I  dsferved 
 to  be  kicked  out  oi'  the  world  ;  yet  found  fonie  comfort 
 in  "  committing  my  caufe  to  God.  It  is  good  for  me  to  be 
 "  alKi(fted,"  that  I  may  die  wholly  tp  this  world,  and  all  that 
 is  in  it. 
 
 Wednefday,  Auguft  3.  Spent  moftoftheday  in  writing. 
 Efnjoyed  loine  fenie  of  religion.  Through  divine  goodncfs  I 
 am  now  uninterruptedly  alone;  and  find  my  retirement  com- 
 fortable. I  have  enjoyed  more  fenfe  ot  divine  things  within  a 
 few  days  laft  pafl,  than  for  fome  time  before.  I  longed  aiter 
 holinefs,  humihty,  and  mecknefs:  O  that  God  would  enable 
 me  to  "  pafs  the  time  of  my  fojourning  here  in  his  fear,"  and 
 always  live  to  him  ! 
 
 Thurfday,  Auguft  4.  Was  enabled  to  pray  much,  through 
 the  whole  day;  and  through  divine  goodne Is  found  fome  in- 
 tenfenefs  of  foul  in  the  duty,  as  I  ufed  to  do,  and  fome  abili- 
 ty to  perfevere  in  my  fupplications :  had  fome  apprehenfions 
 of  divine  things,  that  were  engaging,  and  that  gave  me  fome 
 courage  and  refolution.  It  is  good,  I  find,  to  perfevere  in  at- 
 tempts to  pray,  if  I  cannot  pray  with  perfeverance,  i.  e.  con- 
 tinue long  in  my  addrelfes  to  the  divine  Being.  I  have  gene- 
 rally found,  that  the  more  I  do  in  fecret  prayer,  the  more  I 
 have* delighted  to  do,  and  have  enjoyed  more  of  a  fpirit  of 
 prayer :  and  frequently  have  found  the  contrary,  when  with 
 journeying  or  otherwife,  I  have  been  much  deprived  of  retire- 
 ment. A  ieafonable  fteady  performance  of  fecret  duties  in  their 
 proper  hours,  and  a  careful  improvement  of  all  time,  filling 
 up  every  hour  with  fome  profitable  labour,  either  of  heart, 
 head,  or  hands,  are  excellent  means  of  fpiritual  peace  end 
 boldnefs  before  God.  "  Chrift"  indeed  "  is  our  peace,  and 
 '*  by  him  we  have  boldnefs  of  accefs  to  God;"  but  a  good 
 confcience,  void  of  offence,  is  an  excellent  preparatign  for  an 
 approach  into  the  divine  prefence.  There  is  diifcrence  be- 
 tween j elf -confidence  and  a  f elf-right  eons  pleafing  curfelves 
 (with  our  own  duties,  attainments,  and  fpiritual  enjoyments), 
 which  godly  fouls  fometimes  are  guilty  of,  and  that  holy  confi- 
 dence arifing  from  the  teftimony  of  a  good  confcience,  which 
 good  Hezekiah  had,  when  he  fay?,  "  Kcmembcr,  O  Lord,  I 
 *'  befeech  thee,  how  I  have  walked  before  thee  in  truth,  and 
 "  with  a  perfefl  heart."  "  Then,"  fays  the  holy  pfalmift, 
 "  /hall  I  not  be  afhamed,  when  I  have  rcfpccl  to  all  thy  com- 
 
 K  2  "  mandments." 
 
7^  THE     LIFE     O  P  J.  D.  1743, 
 
 "  manJments."  Filling  up  our  time  ivlth  and/cr  God,  is  the 
 way  to  rile  up  and  lie  dpwn  in  peace. 
 
 [The  next  eif^ht  days,  he  continued  for  the  moil  part  in  a 
 very  comfortable  frame,  having  his  mind  fixed  and  Iwectly 
 engaged  in  rcii-Tion ;  and  more  than  once  blclfes  God,  that 
 he  had  given  him  a  little  cittagf,  where  he  might  live  alone, 
 and  enjoy  a  happy  retirement,  free  from  noife  and  dilturb- 
 auce,  and  could  at  any  hour  of  the  day  lay  aiide  all  ftudies, 
 and  fpend  time  in  lifting  up  his  foul  to  God  foi"  fpiritual 
 bleffings.] 
 
 Saturday,  Auguft  13.  Was  enabled  in  fecrct  prayer  to  raife 
 roy  foul  to  God,  with  defire  and  delight.  It  was  indeed  a 
 bkded  feafon  to  my  foul:  I  found  the  comfort  of  being  a 
 Chrifrian :  "  I  counted  the  fulferings  of  the  prefent  life 
 "  not  worthy  to  be  compared  with  the  glory"  of  divine  en- 
 joyments even  in  this  world.  All  my  paft  forrows  feemed 
 kindly  to  difappear,  and  I  "  remem.bered  no  more  the  forrow 
 
 "  for  joy." O,  how  kindly,  and  with  what  a  filial  tender- 
 
 nefs,  the  foul  hangs  on,  and  confides  in  tkt^  Rock  cf  cires,  at 
 fuch  a  feafon,  that  he  will  *■  never  leave  it,  nor  forfake  it," 
 that  he  will  caufe  "  all  things  to  work  together  for  its  good!" 
 or.  I  longed,  that  others  ftiould  know  how  good  a  God  the 
 Ijord  is.  I\iy  foul  was  full  oftendernefs  and  love,  even  to 
 the  moft  inveterate  of  my  enemies :  I  longed  they  fhould  fliarc 
 in  the  fame  mercy.  I  Icvcd  and  longed  that  God  fhould  do 
 juft  as  he  pleafed  M'ith  m.e  and  every  thing  elfe.  I  felt  ex- 
 ceeding ferious,  calm,  and  peaceful,  and  encouraged  to  prefs 
 after  holinefs  as  long  as  I  live,  whatever  difficulties  and  trials 
 may  be  in  my  wa)'.  May  the  Lord  always  help  me  fo  to  do ! 
 Amen,  and  Amen. 
 
 Lord's  day,  Auguft  14.  I  had  much  more  freedom  in  public, 
 than  in  private.  God  enabled  mc  to  fpeak  with  feme  teeling 
 fenfe  of  di\ine  things  ;  but  percti^ed  no  confiderable  eftcct. 
 
 Mondr^y,  Auguft  15.  Spent  moft  of  the  day  in  labour  to 
 procure  fomething  to  keep  my  horfc  on  in  the  winter. — Enjoyed 
 not  much  fweetncfs  in  the  morning:  was  very  weak  in  body, 
 through  the  day,  and  thought  this  frail  body  would  foon  drop 
 into-  the  dull::  had  forne  very  realizing  apprehenfions  of  a 
 ipeedy  entrance  into  another  woild.  And  in  this  weak 
 /lute  of  body,  was  not  2  little  dirircflcd  for  want  of  fuitable 
 food.  Had  no  bread,  nor  could  I  get  any.  I  am  forced  to 
 go  or  fend  ten  or  fifteen  miles  for  all  the  bread  I  eat;  an^ 
 |bmetiraes  it  is  mouldy  and  foure,  before  I  cat  it,  if  I  get  any 
 
 confiderabie 
 
Mt.  a6.       Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D,  7^ 
 
 confiderable  quantity :  and  then  again  I  have  none  for  feme 
 davs  together,  for  want  of  an  opportunity  to  fend  for  it,  and 
 cannot  find  my  horle  in  the  woods  to  go  myfelf ;  and  this 
 was  my  cafe  now  :  but  through  divine  goodneis  I  had  fomc 
 Indian  7neal,  of  M'hich  I  made  little  cakes,  and  fried  them. 
 Yet  felt  contented  with  my  circumftances,  and  fweetly  re- 
 /igned  to  God.  In  prayer  I  enjoyed  great  freedom ;  and 
 bleffed  God  as  much  for  my  prelent  ciicumflances,  as  if  I  had 
 been  a  king  ;  and  thought,  1  found  adilpolition  to  be  content- 
 ed in  any  circumftances.     Bleffed  be  God! 
 
 [The  reft  of  this  week,  he  was  exceeding  weak  in  body, 
 and  much  exercifed  with  pain;  and  yet  obliged  from  day  to 
 day  to  labour  hard,  to  procure  fodder  for  his  horfe ;  except- 
 ing fome  part  of  the  time  he  was  fo  very  ill,  that  he  was  nei- 
 ther able  to  work  nor  ftudy :  but  fpeaks  of  longings  after  ho- 
 linefs  and  perfefi:  conformity  to  God',  complains  of  enjoying 
 but  little  of  God  :  yet  fays,  that  little  was  better  to  him,  than 
 all  the  world  bcfides.  In  his  diary  for  Saturday,  he  lays,  he 
 was  fomething  melancholy  and  forrowful  in  mind;  and  adds, 
 "  I  never  feel  comfortably,  but  when  I  find  my  foul  going 
 **  forth  after  God  :  if  I  cannot  be  holy,  I  muft  neceifarily  be 
 "  miferable  for  ever."] 
 
 Lord's  day,  Auguft  21.  "Was  m.uch  ftraitened  in  the  forc- 
 noon-exercile  :  my  thoughts  feemed  to  be  all  fcattercd  to  the 
 ends  of  the  earth.  At  noon,  I  fell  down  before  the  Lord, 
 ^nd  groned  under  m^  vilenefs,  barrennefs,  deadnefs,  and  felt 
 as  if  I  was  guilty  of  foul-murder,  in  fpeaking  to  immortal 
 fouls  in  fuch  a  manner  as  I  had  then  done. In  the  after- 
 noon, God  was  pleafed  to  give  me  fome  affiftance,  and  I  was 
 enabled  to  itt  before  my  hearers  the  nature  and  necefTity  of 
 true  repentance,  tc.  Afterwards  had  fome  fmall  degree  of 
 thankfulnefs.  Was  very  ill  and  full  of  pain  in  the  evening; 
 and  my  foul  mourned  that  I  had  fpent  fo  much  time  to  fo  little 
 profit. 
 
 Monday,  Auguft  11.  Spent  moft  of  the  day  in  ftudy  ;  and 
 found  my  bodily  ftrength  in  a  meafure  reftored.  Had  fome 
 intcnfe  and  paftionate  breathings  of  foul  after  holinefs,  and 
 very  clear  manifeftations  of  my  utter  inability  to  procure,  cr 
 work  it  in  myfelf;  it  is  wholly  owing  to  the  power  of  God. 
 O,  with  what  tendernefs  the  love  and  defire  of  holinefs  fills 
 the  foul !  I  wanted  to  wing  out  of  myfelf  to  God,  or  rather 
 to  get  a  conformity  to  him  :  but,  alas !  I  cannot  add  to  my  fia- 
 tur?  in  grace  one  cubit.     However,  my' foul  can  never  leave 
 
 ftriving 
 
78  T  H  E    L  I  f  E     O  F  A.  D.  174J. 
 
 ftriving  for  it ;  or  at  leaft  groning,  that  it  cannot  (li-ive  for 
 
 it,  and  obtain  more  purity  of  heart. At  night,  I  fpent  fome 
 
 time  in  inlhudting  my  poor  people :  Oh  that  God  would  pity 
 their  I'ouls  I 
 
 Tuelday,  Auguft  23.  Studied  in  the  forenoon,  and  enjoy- 
 ed fome  freedom.  In  the  afternoon,  laboured  abroad  :  endea- 
 voured to  pray  much  ;  but  found  not  much  Iweetnefs  or  in- 
 tenfenefs  of  mind.  Towards  night,  was  very  Meary,  and 
 tired  of  this  world  of  forrow  :  the  thoughts  of  death  and  im- 
 mortality appeared  very  defirable,  and  even  refreihed  my 
 foul.     Thole    lines  turned  in  my  mind  with  pleafure, 
 
 C'ime,  death,  Jhake  hands ;  Til  kifs  thy  bands  : 
 ^Tis  happinefs  for  me  to  die. 
 What!  doJHh'Ju  think,  thatlvJtllJhrinkP 
 I'll  go  to  immortality. 
 
 In  evening-prayer,  God  was  pleafed  to  draw  near  my  foul, 
 though  very  fmful  and  unworthy:  was  enabled  to  wreftle 
 ■with  God,  and  to  perfevere  in  my  requefts  for  grace  :  I  pour- 
 ed out  my  foul  for  all  the  world,  friends,  and  enemies.  My 
 foul  was  concerned,  not  fo  much  for  fouls  as  luch,  but  rather 
 for  Chrift's  kingdom,  that  it  might  appear  in  the  world,  that 
 God  might  be  known  to  be  God,  in  the  whole  earth.  And 
 Oh,  my  foul  abhorred  the  very  thought  of  a  p^rty  in  religion ! 
 Let  the  truth  of  God  appear,  where-ever  it  is ;  and  God  have 
 the  glory  for  ever.  Amen.  This  was  indeed  a  comfortable 
 feaion  :  I  thought  I  had  fome  fmall  tafte  of,  and  real  relifh 
 for  the  enjoyments  and  employments  of  the   upper  world. 
 
 0  that  my  foul  was  more  attempered  to  it ! 
 
 Wednefday,  Auguft  24.  Spent  lome  time,  in  the  morning, 
 in  ftudy  and  prayer.  Afterwards,  was  engaged  in  fome  ne- 
 ceffary  bufinels  abroad.  Towards  night,  found  a  little  time 
 for  fome  particular  ftudies.  I  thought,  if  God  fhould  fay, 
 *^  Ceafe  making  any  provifion  for  this  life,  for  you  fhall  in  a 
 "  few  days  go  out  of  time  into  eternity,"  my  foul  would 
 leap  for  joy.  O  that  I  may  both  ''  dehre  to  be  diflblved,  to 
 ''  be  with  Chrift,'  and  likewiie  "wait  patiently  all  the  days 
 *'  of  my  appointed  time  till  n^y  change   come  I" — But,  alas! 
 
 1  am  very  unfit  lor  the  bufmels  and  bleflednefs  of  heaven. — 
 O  for  more  holinefs ! 
 
 Thurfday,  Auguft.  25.  Part  of  the  day,  engaged  ip 
 ftudies ;  and  part,  in  labour  abroad.  1  find  it  is  impolTiblc 
 to  enjoy  peace  and  tranquiUity  of  mind  without  a  careful  im- 
 provement of  time.  This  is  really  an  imitation  of  God  and 
 Chrift  Jefus :  "  r.ly   Father  worketh  hitherto,  and  I  work," 
 
 fays 
 
JEt.i6.       Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  79 
 
 fays  our  Lord.     But  ftill,  if  we  would  be  like  God,  we  mufi: 
 
 fee  that  we  fill  up  our  ti.ne  for  him. 1  daily  long  to  dwell 
 
 in  perfect  light  and  love.  In  the  mean  time,  my  foul  mout  ns 
 that  I  make  fo  little  progrefs  in  grace,  and  preparation  for  the 
 ■world  of  bleffednefs :  I  fee  and  know  that  1  am  a  very  barren 
 tree  in  God's  vineyard,  and  that  he  might  juftly  fay,  "Cut  it 
 '*  down,"  6c.  O  that  God  would  make  me  more  lively  and 
 rigorous  in  grace,  for  his  own  glory !  Amen. 
 
 [The  two  next  days,  he  was  much  engaged  in  fome  ne- 
 ceffary  labours,  in  which  he  extremely  fpent  himfclf.  He 
 feems,  thefe  days  to  have  had  a  great  fenfe  of  the  vanity  of 
 the  world;  and  continued  longings  after  holinefs,  and  more 
 fervency  of  fpirit  in  the  fervice  of  God.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  Auguft.  28.  Was  much  perplexed  with  fome 
 irreligious  Dutch-men.  All  their  difcourfe  turned  upon  the 
 things  of  the  world ;  which  v^^as  no  fmall  exercife  to  my 
 mind.  Oh,  what  a  hell  it  would  be  to  fpend  an  eternity  with 
 fuch  men !  Well  might  David  fay,  "  I  beheld  the  tranfgreffors, 
 **  and  was  grieved." — But  adored  be  God,  heaven  is  a  place 
 "  into  which  no  unclean  thing  enters."  Oh,  I  long  for  the 
 holinefs  of  that  world !  Lord,  prepare  me  therefor. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  (tt  out  on  a  journey  to  New- York. 
 Was  fomething  dejefted,  the  two  firft  days  of  his  journey  ; 
 but  yet  feems  to  have  enjoyed  fome  degrees  of  the  fenfible 
 prefencc  of  God.] 
 
 Wednefday,  Auguft  31.  Rode  down  to  Bethlehem:  was 
 in  a  fweet,  ferious,  and,  I  hope,  Chriftian  frame,  when  I 
 came  there ;  eternal  things  engroffed  all  my  thoughts ;  and  I 
 longed  to  be  in  the  world  of  fpirits.  O  how  happy  is  it,  to 
 have  all  our  thoughts  fwallowed  up  in  that  world ;  to  feel 
 one's  felf  a  ferious  confiderate  flra::ger  in  this  world,  diligent- 
 ly feeking  a  road  through  it,  the  beft,  the  fure  road  to  the 
 heavenly  Jerufalem  ! 
 
 Thurfday,  September  i.  Rode  to  Danbury.  Was  more 
 ^uU  and  dejected  in  fpirit,  than  yellerday.  Indeed,  I  always 
 feel  comfortably,  when  God  realizes  death,  and  the  things  of 
 another  world,  to  my  mind,:  whenever  my  mind  is  taken  off 
 from  the  things  of  this  world,  and  fet  on  God,  my  foul  is 
 then  at  reji. 
 
 [He  went  forward  on  his  jturncy,  and  came  t©  New- York 
 *  on 
 
t9  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  J.D.  174/, 
 
 •n  the  next  Tvlonday.  And  after  tarrying  there  two  or  three 
 days,  fet  out  from  the  city  towards  New- Haven,  intending  to 
 be  there  at  the  commencement ;  and  on  Fridr.y  came  to 
 Horfe-Neck.  In  the  mean  time,  he  complains  much  of  dul- 
 nefs,  and  want  of  fervour  in  religion :  but  yet  from  time  to 
 time,  fpeaks  of  his  enjoying  fpiritual  warmth  and  fweetnefs  in 
 converfation  with  Chriftian  friends,  affiftance  in  public  fcr- 
 rices^,  6c.2 
 
 Saturday,  September  10.  Rode  fix  miles  to  Stanwich,  and 
 preached  to  a  conliderable  afleaibly  of  people.  Had  fome 
 alTiftance  and  freedom,  efpccially  towards  the  clofe.  Endea- 
 voured much  afterwards,  in  private  converfation,  to  eftablifii 
 holinefs,  humility,  meeknefs,  &c.  as  the  eifence  of  true  re- 
 ligion; and  to  moderate  fome  noify  fort  of  perfons,  that  ap- 
 peared to  me  to  be  afted  by  unleen  fpiritual  pride.  Alas, 
 what  extremes  men  incline  to  run  into! — Returned  to  Horfe- 
 Neck,  and  felt  fome  fcrioufnefs  and  fweet  Iblemnity  in  the 
 evening. 
 
 Lord's  day,  September  11.  In  the  afternoon,  preached 
 from  Tit.  iii.  8.  I  think,  God  never  helped  me  more  in  paint- 
 ing out  true  religion,  and  in  detefting  clearly,  and  tenderly 
 difcountenancing  falfe  appearances  of  religion,  wild-fire  party- 
 zeal,  fpiritual  pride,  dc .    as   well  as  a  confident  dogmatical 
 
 fpirit,  and  its  fpring,  viz.  ignorance  of  the  heart. In  the 
 
 evening,  took  much  pains  in  private  converfation  to  fup- 
 prefs  fome  confufions,  that  I  perceived  were  amongft  that 
 people. 
 
 Monday,  September  12.  Rode  to  Mr  Mills's  at  Ripton^ 
 Had  fome  perplexing  hours ;  but  was  fome  part  of  the  day 
 very  comfortable.  It  is  "^  through  great  trials,"  I  fee,  "that 
 *■'  we  rauft  enter  the  gates  of  paradife."  If  my  foul  could 
 but  be  holy,  that  God  might  not  be  difhonoured,  methinks  J 
 could  bear  forrows. 
 
 Tuffda)^,  September  13.  Rode  to  New-Haven.  Was 
 fometimes  dejefted;    not  in  the   fweeteil   frame.      Lodged 
 
 at  *•***.  Had  fome  profitable  Chriftian  converfation,  6c. ^ 
 
 I  find,  though  my  inward  trials  are  great,  and  a  life  of  foli- 
 tude  gives  them  greater  advantage  to  fettle,  and  penetrate  to 
 the  very  inmoft  receffes  of  the  fjul  ;  yet  it  is  better  to  be 
 alone,  than  incumbered  with  noife  and  tumult.  I  find  it 
 very  difficult  maintaining  any  fenfe  of  divine  things,  while 
 removing  from  place  to  place,  diverted  with  new  objefts, 
 and  filled  with  care  and  bufmefs.  A  fettled  fteady  bufinefs  is 
 beft  adapted  to  a  life  of  ftrict  religion. 
 
 Wedncfday,  ' 
 
^/.  26.        Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D,  8r 
 
 Wednefday,  September  14.  This  day  I  ought  to  have 
 taken  my  degree  *  ;  but  God  fees  fit  to  deny  it  mc.  And 
 though  I  was  greatly  afraid  of  being  overwhelmed  with  per- 
 plexity and  confulion,  when  I  fhould  fee  my  clafs-mates  take 
 theirs;  yet,  in  the  very  feafon  of  it,  (.3 od  enabled  me  witn 
 calmnefs  and  refignation  to  fay,  "  The  will  of  the  Lord  be 
 "  done."  Indeed,  through  divine  goodnefs,  I  have  Icarcely 
 felt  my  mind  fo  calm,  feckte,  and  comfortable  for  iome  time. 
 1  have  long  feared  this  feafon,  and  expcfted  my  humility, 
 meeknefs,  patience,  and  refignation  would  be  much  tried  f : 
 but  found  much  more  pleafure  and  divine  comfort,  than  I  ex- 
 pefted. — Felt  fpiritually  fcrious,  tender  and  afFe£lionate  in 
 private  prayer  with  a  dear  Chriftian  friend  to-day. 
 
 Thurfday,  September  15.  Had  fome  fatisfadlion  in  hear- 
 ing the  minifters  difccurfe,  <6c.  It  is  always  a  comfort  to  mc, 
 to  hear  religious  and  fpiritual  difcourfe.  O  that  minifters  and 
 people  were  more  fpiritual  and  devoted  to  God !— Towards 
 night,  with  the  advice  of  Chriftian  friends,  I  offered  the 
 following  reflexions  in  writing,  to  the  reftor  and  truftees  of 
 the  college,  (which  are  for  fubftance  the  fame  that  I  had  free- 
 ly offered  to  the  reftor  before,  and  intreated  him  to  ac* 
 cept) ;  and  this  I  did,  that  if  pofTible  I  might  cut  off  all  oc- 
 caflon  of  ftumbling  and  offence,  from  thole  that  feek  occa- 
 ilon.     What  I  offered,  is  as  follows. 
 
 "  Whereas  I  have  faid  before  feveral  perfons,  concerning 
 "  Mr  Whittelfey,  one  of  the  tutors  of  Yale-college,  that  I 
 *'  did  not  believe  he  had  any  more  grace  than  the  chair  I 
 "  then  leaned  upon  ;  I  humbly  confefs,  that  herein  I  have 
 "  finned  againft  God,  and  afted  contrary  to  the  rules  of  his 
 "  word,  and  have  injured  Mr  WHiittelfey.  I  had  no  right  to 
 "  make  thus  free  with  his  charafter ;  and  had  no  juft  rcafon 
 **  to  fay  as  I  did  concerning  him.  My  fault  herein  was  the 
 "  more  aggravated,  in  that  I  faid  this  concerning  one  that 
 *'  was  fo  much  my  fuperior,  and  one  that  I  was  obliged 
 "  to  treat  with  fpecial  refpeft  and  honour,  by  re;Jon 
 "  of  the  relation   I  l^ood  in  to  him  in  the  college.     Such 
 
 *  This  being  c^mmencemeiit'dzy . 
 
 f  His  trial  was  the  greater,  in  that,  had  it  not  been  for  the 
 difpleafure  of  the  governors  of  the  college,  he  would  nut  c;;!y 
 on  that  day  have  fhared  with  his  clafs- mates  in  the  public  hor.o'is 
 which  they  then  received,  but  would  on  that  occafion  have  appear- 
 ed at  the  head  of  that  clafs ;  which,  if  he  h:;d  been  with  tin  , 
 would  have  been  the  raoft  numerous  of  any  that  ever  had  been  gra- 
 duated at  that  college. 
 
 h  "a 
 
82  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  A.  D.  1743. 
 
 "  a   manner   of  behaviour,    I    confefs,    did    not   become    a 
 "  Chriftian ;    it   was   taking   too   much  upon   me,    and   did 
 "  not  favour  of  that  humble  refpeft,  that  I  ought  to  have  ex- 
 "  preffed   towards    Mr  Whittelfey.     I   have  long  fmce  been 
 "  convinced  of  the  falfenefs  of  thofe  apprehenfions,  by  which 
 "  I  then  juftificd  fuch  a  conduct.     I  have  often  reflected  on 
 "  this   aft  with  grief  ;    I  hope,  on  account  of  the  fm  of  it : 
 "  and  am  willing  to  lie  low,  and  be  abafcd  before  God  and 
 "  man  for  it.     And  humbly  afk  the  forgivenefs  of  the  gover- 
 <'  nors  of  the  college,  and  of  the  whole  fociety  ;  but  of  Mr 
 "  Whittelfey  in  particular.   And  whereas  I  have  been  accufed 
 "  by  one  perfon  of  faying   concerning  the  reverend  rector 
 "  of  Yale-college,  that  I  wondered  he  did  not  expeft  to  drop 
 "  down  dead   for   fining  the  fcholars  that  followed  Mr  Tcn- 
 "  nent  to  Milford  ;  I  ferioufly  profcfs,  that  I  do  not  remem- 
 *•  ber  my  faying  any  thing  to  this  purpofe.     But  if  I  did, 
 "  which  I  am  not  certain  I  did  not,  I  utterly  condemn  it,  and 
 "  dcteft  all  fuch  kind   of  behaviour;  and  efpecially  in  an  un- 
 "  dergraduate   towards   the   re6tor.     And  I  now  appear,  to 
 "  judge  and  condemn   myfeif  for  going  once  to  the  feparate 
 "  meeting  in    New- Haven,    a  little   before   I   was   expelled^ 
 "  though  the  reftor  had  refufed  to  give  mc  leave.     For  this 
 "  I   humbly  afk  the  rector's   forgivenefs.     And   whether  the 
 '^  governors  of  the   college   fhall   ever  fee  caufe  to  remove 
 "  the  academical  cenfure   I  lie  under,  or  no,  or  to  admit  mc 
 "  to   the  privileges    I   defire  ;  yet  I  am  willing  to  appear,  if 
 *'  they  think  fit,  openly  to  own,  and  to  humble  myfeif  for 
 ''  thofe  things  I  have  herein  con fe fled." 
 
 God  has  made  me  willing  to  do  any  thing,  that  I  can  do, 
 confident  v.'ith  truth,  for  the  fake  of  peace,  and  that  I  might 
 not  be  a  ftumbling-block  and  offence  to  others.  For  this  rca- 
 fon  I  can  cheerfully  forego,  and  give  up  what  I  verily  believe, 
 after  the  moft  mature  and  impartial  fearch,  is  my  right,  in 
 fome  inftances.  God  has  given  me  that  difpofition,  that  if 
 this  were  the  cafe,  that  a  man  has  done  mc  an  hundred  inju- 
 I'ies,  and  I  (though  ever  fo  much  provoked  to  it)  have  done 
 Iiim  one,  I  feel  dilpofed,  and  heartily  ivilling  humbly  to  con- 
 fefs my  fault  to  him,  and  on  my  knees  to  aflc  forgivenefs  of 
 him ;  though  at  the  fame  time  he  fliould  juftify  himfelf  in 
 all  the  injuries  he  has  done  me,  and  fliould  only  make  ufc  of 
 my  humble  confeffion  to  blacken  my  charaiPier  the  more, 
 and  reprefcnt  me  as  the  only  perfon  guilty,  (i^c. ;  yea,  though 
 he  fhould  as  it  were  infult  me,  and  fay,  "  he  knew  all  this  bc- 
 "  fore,  and  that  I  was  making  work  for  repentance,''  dr. 
 Though   what  I   faid  concerning  Mr  M^hittelfcy  was  only 
 
 fpokea 
 
Mt.i6.        Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  83 
 
 fpoken  in  private,  to  a  friend  or  two ;  and  being  partly  over- 
 heard, was  related  to  the  reftor,  and  by  him  extorted  from 
 my  friends ;  yep,  feeing  it  was  divulged  and  made  public, 
 I  was  willing  to  confefs  my  fault  therein  publickly — But  I 
 truft;  God  will  plead- my  caufe  *. 
 
 [The  next  day  he  went  to  Derby  ;  then  to  Southbury, 
 where  he  fpent  the  Sabbath :  and  fpeaks  of  fome  fpiritual 
 comfort;  but  complains  much  of  unfixednefs,  and  wanderings 
 of  mind  in  religion.] 
 
 Monday,  September  19.  In  the  afternoon,  rode  to  Beth- 
 lehem, and  there  preached.  Had  fome  meafure  of  ailiftance, 
 both  in  prayer  and  preaching.  I  felt  ferious,  kind  and  tender 
 towards  all  mankind,  and  longed  that  holinefs  might  fiourifh 
 more  on  earth. 
 
 Tuefday,  September  20.  Had  thoughts  of  going  forward 
 on  my  journey  to  my  Indians  ;  but  towards  night  was  taken 
 with  a  hard  pain  in  my  teeth,  and  fliivering  colJ,  and  could 
 not  pofTibly   recover   a  comfortable   degree   of  warmth  the 
 
 *  I  was  witncfs  to  the  very  Chriftian  fpirit  Mr  Brainerd  (hewed 
 at  that  time,  being  then  at  New-Haven,  and  being  one  that  he  faw 
 fit  10  confult  on  that  occafion.  (This  was  the  firft  time  that  ever 
 I  had  opportunity  of  perfonal  acquaintance  with  him.)  There  truly 
 appeared  in  him  a  great  degree  of  calmnefs  and  humility ;  without 
 the  leaf!  appearance  of  riflng  of  fpirit  for  any  ill  treatment  he  fap- 
 .pofed  ke  had  fuffered,  or  the  leaft  backwardnefs  to  abafe  himfelf 
 before  them  who  he  thought  had  wronged  him.  What  he  did  was 
 without  any  objedlion  or  appearance  of  reludaace,  even  in  private 
 to  his  friends,  that  he  freely  opened  himfelf  to.  Earneft  applica- 
 tion was  made  on  his  behalf  to  the  authority  of  the  college,  that 
 he  might  have  his  degree  then  given  him  ;  and  particularly  by  the 
 Reverend  Mr  Burr  of  Newark,  one  of  the  correfpondents  of  the 
 honourable  fociety  in  Scotland  ;  he  being  fent  from  New-Jerfey  to 
 New-Haven,  by  the  reft  of  the  commiffioners,  for  that  end  ;  and 
 many  arguments  were  ufed,  but  without  'uccefs.  Indeed  the  go- 
 vernors of  the  college  were  fo  far  fatisfied  with  the  rclleftions  Mr 
 Brainerd  had  made  on  himfelf,  that  they  appeared  willing  to  admit 
 him  again  into  college ;  but  not  10  give  him  his  degree,  till  he 
 fliould  have  remained  there,  at  leaft  a  twelve-month,  which  being 
 contrary  to  what  the  correfpondents,  to  whom  he  was  now  engaged, 
 had  declared  to  be  their 'mind,  he  did  not  coofent  to  it.-  He  deii- 
 red  his  degree,  as  he  thought  it  would  tend  to  his  being  more  extent 
 iively  ufstul  ;  but  ftill  when  he  was  denied  it,  he  raanlfefted  no 
 difappointment  or  rcfcr.tment. 
 
 L  2  whol: 
 
^4  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  J.  D.  174^, 
 
 "whole  nighc  following.  I  continued  very  full  of  pain  all 
 night ;  and  in  the  morning  had  a  very  hard  fever,  and  pains 
 almoft  all  over  my  whole  body.  I  had  a  fenfe  of  the  divine 
 goodnefs  in  appointing  this  to  be  the  place  of  my  ficknef?, 
 viz.  among  my  friends  that  were  very  kind  to  me.  I  ihould 
 probably  have  perifhed,  if  I  had  firft  got  home  to  my  own 
 iioufe  in  the  wildernefs,  where  I  have  none  to  converfe  with 
 but  the  poor  rude  ignorant  Indians.  Here  I  faw  was  mercy 
 in  the  midft  of  afBiftion.  I  continued  thus,  moftly  confined 
 to  my  bed,  till  Friday  night ;  very  full  of  pain  moft  of  the 
 time  ;  but  through  divine  goodnefs  not  afraid  of  death.  Then. 
 the  extreme  folly  of  thofe  appeared  to  me,  who  put  off  their 
 tu'  ning  to  God  till  a  fick-bed.     Surely  this  is  not  a  time  pro- 
 
 p.  I  to  prepare   for  eternity. On  Friday  evening  my  pains 
 
 went  off  fomething  fuddenly ;  and  I  was  exceeding  weak, 
 and  almoft  fainted ;  but  was  very  comfortable  the  night  fol- 
 lowing. Thefe  words  P(al.  cxviii.  17.  I  frequently  revolved 
 in  my  mind ;  and  thought  we  were  to  prize  the  continuation 
 of  life  only  on  this  account,  that  we  may  *'  fhcw  forth  God's 
 '*  goodnefs  and  works  of  grace.'' 
 
 [From  this  time,  he  gradually  recovered ;  and  on  the  next 
 Tuefday  was  fo  well  as  to  be  able  to  go  forward  on  his  journey 
 homewards;  but  was  till  the  Tuefday  following  before  he 
 reached  Kaunaum.eek.  And  fecms,  great  part  of  this  time, 
 to  have  had  a  very  deep  and  lively  fenfe  of  the  vanity  and 
 emptinefs  of  all  things  here  below,  and  of  the  reality,  near- 
 nefs,  and  vaft  importance  of  eternal  things.] 
 
 I 
 
 Tuefday,  Oflober  4.  This  day  rode  home  to  my  own 
 houfe  and  people.  The  poor  Indians  appeared  very  glad  of 
 my  return.  Found  my  houfe  and  all  things  in  fafety.  I  pre- 
 isntly  fell  on  my  knees,  and  bleflcd  God  for  my  fafe  return, 
 afttr  a  long  and  tedious  journey,  and  a  fcafon  of  ficknefs  in  feve- 
 ral  places  where  I  had  been,  and  after  I  had  been  fick  my- 
 feif.  God  has  renewed  his  kindnefs  to  me,  in  preferving  me 
 one  journey  more.  I  have  taken  many  confiderable  journeys 
 fmce  this  time  laft  year,  and  yet  God  has  never  fuffered  one 
 of  my  bones  to  be  broken,  or  any  diftreffmg  calamity  to  befal 
 me,  excepting  the  ill  turn  I  had  in  niy  laft  journey ;  though  I 
 have  been  otten  expofed  to  cold  and  hunger  in  the  wildernefs, 
 where  the  comforts  of  life  were  not  to  be  had ;  have  frequent- 
 ly been  loft  in  the  woods ;  and  fometimes  obliged  to  ride  much 
 of  the  nii^ht ;  and  once  lay  out  in  the  woods  all  night.  Bleffed 
 he  God  that  has  preferved  me  I 
 
 ■  -  .         lu 
 
mt.i6.      Mr    DAVID     B  R  A 1  N  E  R  D.  85 
 
 [In  his  diary  for  the  next  eleven  days,  are  great  complaints 
 of  diftance  from  God,  fpiritual  pride,  corruption,  and  exceed- 
 ing vilenefs.  He  once  fays,  his  heart  was  fo  piefled  "with  a 
 fenfc  of  his  poUuiion,  that  he  could  fcarcely  have  the  face 
 and  impudence  (as  it  then  appeared  to  him)  to  defire  that 
 God  ftiould  not  damn  him  for  ever.  And  at  another  time, 
 he  fays,  he  had  fo  little  fenfe  of  God,  or  apprehcnfion  and 
 relifh  of  his  glory  and  excellency,  that  it  made  him  more 
 difpofed  to  kindnefs  and  tendernefs  towards  thofe  who  are 
 blind  and  ignorant  of  God  and  things  divine  and  heavenly.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  Oftober  16.  In  the  evening,  God  was  pleafed 
 to  give  me  a  feeling  fenfe  of  my  own  unworthinefs  ;  but  through 
 divine  goodnefs  fuch  as  tended  to  draw,  rather  than  drive  me 
 from  God :  it  filled  me  with  folemnity.  I  retired  alone,  (ha- 
 ving at  this  time  a  friend  with  mc),  and  poured  out  my  foul  to 
 God  with  much  freedom ;  and  yet  in  anguiih,  to  find  myfeli: 
 fo  unfpeakably  finful  and  unworthy  before  a  holy  God.  Was 
 now  much  refigned  under  God's  difpenfations  towards  mc, 
 though  my  trials  had  been  very  great.  But  thought  whether 
 I  could  be  refigned,  if  God  Ihould  let  the  French  Indians 
 come  upon  me,  and  deprive  me  of  my  life,  ®r  carry  me  away 
 captive,  (though  I  knew  of  no  fpecial  reafon  then  to  propole 
 this  trial  to  myfelf,  more  than  any  other) ;  and  my  foul  feem- 
 ed  fo  far  to  reft  and  acquiefce  in  God,  that  the  fting  and  ter- 
 ror of  thefe  things  feemcd  in  a  great  meafure  gone.  Prefent- 
 ly  after  I  came  to  the  Indians,  whom  I  was  teaching  to  fing 
 pfalm-tunes  that  evening,  I  received  the  following  letter  from 
 Stockbrigde,  by  a  mefienger  fent  on  the  Sabbath  on  purpofej, 
 which  made  it  appear  of  greater  importance. 
 
 *'  Sir,  Juft  now  we  received  advices  from  Col.  Stoddar^, 
 "  that  there  is  the  utmoft  danger  of  a  rupture  with  France. 
 *'  He  has  received  the  fame  from  his  excellency  our  gover- 
 "  nor,  ordering  him  to  give  notice  to  all  the  expofed  places, 
 "  that  they  may  fecure  themfelves  the  befc  they  can  againft 
 "  any  fudden  invafion.  We  thought  beft  to  fend  directly  to 
 "  Kaunaumeek,  that  you  may  take  the  prudenteft  meafures 
 "  for  your  fafety  that  dwell  there.     I  am,   Sir,  dc." 
 
 I  thought,  upon  reading  the  contents,  it  came  in  a  good 
 ieafon ;  for  my  heart  feemed  fom/ething  fixed  on  God,  and 
 therefore  I  was  not  much  furprifed :  but  this  news  only  made 
 me  more  ferious,  and  taught  me  that  I  muft  not  pleafe  myfelf 
 with  any  of  the  comforts  of  life  which  I  had  been  preparing 
 for  my  fupport.  BlefTcd  be  God,  that  gave  m.e  any  intenfe- 
 hefs  ?j:d  fervency  this  evening! 
 
 Mondav, 
 
«6  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  A.D,  1743. 
 
 Monday,  October  17.  Had  fome  rifing  hopes  fometimes,. 
 that  "  God  would  arife  and  have  mercy  on  Zion  fpeedily." 
 j\Iy  heart  is  indeed  refie/hcd,  when  I  have  any  prevailing 
 hopes  of  Zion's  profpcrity.  O  that  I  may  fee  the  glorious 
 day,  when  Zion  ihall  become  the  joy  of  the  whole  earth  I 
 Truly  there  is  nothing  that  I  greatly  value  in  this  lower 
 world. 
 
 [On  Tuefday,  he  rode  to  Stockbridgc;  complains  of  be- 
 ing much  diverted,  and  having  but  little  life.  On  Wednef^ 
 day,  he  exprefTes  fome  folemn  fenfe  of  divine  things,  and  a 
 longing  to  be  always  doing  for  God  with  a  godly  frame  of 
 fpirit.] 
 
 Thurfday,  Oflober  20.  Had  but  little  fcnfe  of  divine  things 
 this  day.  Alas,  that  fo  much  of  my  precious  time  is  fpent 
 with  fo  little  of  God!  Thofe  are  tedious  days,  wherein  I 
 have  no  fpirituality. 
 
 Friday,  October  21.  Returned  home  to  Kaunaumeek  :  was 
 glad  to  get  alone  in  ray  little  cottage,  and  to  cry  to  that  God 
 who  feeth  in  lecret,  and  is  prefent  in  a  wildernels. 
 
 Saturday,  Odlober  22.  Had  but  little  fenfible  communion 
 ■with  God.  This  world  is  a  dark  cloudy  manfion.  Oh,  when 
 will  the  Sun  of  rightecufnefs  ihine  on  my  foul  without  cefFation 
 or  interniiiTion  I 
 
 Lord's  day,  Oftober  23.  Jn  the  morning,  had  a  little  dawn 
 of  comfort  arifing  from  hopes  of  feeing  glorious  days  in  the 
 church  of  God  :  was  enabled  to  pray  for  fuch  a  glorious  day 
 with  fome  courage  and  flrength  of  hope.     In  the  forenoon, 
 
 treated   on   the  glories  of  heaven,  ere In  the  afternoon, 
 
 on  the  miferies  of  hell,  and  the  danger  of  going  there.  Had 
 fome  freedom  and  warmth,  both  parts  of  the  day.  And  my 
 people  were  very  attentive.  In  the  evening,  two  or  three 
 came  to  me  under  concern  for  their  fouls ;  to  whom  I  was 
 enabled  to  difcourfe  clofely,  and  with  fome  earneflnefs  and 
 defire.     O  that  God  would  be  merciful  to  their  poor  fouls  i 
 
 [^He  feems,  through  the  whole  of  this  week,  to  have  been 
 greatly  engaged  to  fill  up  every  inch  of  time  in  the  fervice  of 
 God,  and  to  have  been  moft  diligently  employed  in  Hudy, 
 prayer,  and  inflructing  the  Indians ;  aod  from  time  to  time 
 exprelfes  longings  of  foul  after  God,  and  the  advancement  of 
 his  kingdom,  and  fpiritual  comfort  and  rcfrefhment.] 
 
 Lord's  day,   OTtober  30.    In  the  morning,  enjoyed  force 
 
 fixcdnefs 
 
Jgt.^(i.       Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  ^7 
 
 fixednefs  of  foul  in  prayer,  which  was  indeed  fweet  and  de- 
 firable ;  was  enabled  to  leave  myfelf  with  God,  and  to  acqui- 
 cfce  in  him.  At  noon,  my  foul  was  refrefhed  with  reading 
 Rev.  iii.  more  efpecially  the  nth  and  12th  verfes.  O  my 
 foul  longed  for  that  blefTed  day,  when  I  fhould  "  dwell  in 
 *'  the  temple  of  God,"  and  "  go  no  more  out"  of  his  imme- 
 diate prefence ! 
 
 Monday,  October  31.  Rode  to  Kinderhook,  about  fifteen 
 miles  from  my  place.  While  riding,  I  felt  fome  divine  fwect- 
 nefs  in  the  thoughts  of  being  "  a  pillar  in  the  temple  of  God" 
 In  the  upper  world,  and  being  no  more  deprived  of  his  blefled 
 prefence,  and  the  fenfe  of  his  favour,  which  is  "  better  than 
 "  life."  My  foul  was  fo  lifted  up  to  God.  that  I  could  pour 
 out  my  defires  to  him,  for  more  grace  and  further  degrees  of 
 fanclification,  with  abundant  freedom.  Oh,  I  longed  to  be 
 more  abundantly  prepared  for  that  ble/Fednefs,  with  which  I 
 
 was  then  in  fome  meafure  refreilied ! Returned  home  in 
 
 the  evening ;  but  took  an  extremely  bad  cold  by  riding  in  the 
 night. 
 
 Tuefday,  November  1.  Was  very  much  difordered  in  bo- 
 dy, and  fometimes  full  of  pain  in  my  face  and  teeth ;  was  not 
 able  to  fludy  much,  and  had  not  much  fpiritual  comfort.  Alas! 
 when  God  is  withdrawn,  all  is  gone. — Had  fome  fweet  thoughtSj, 
 which  I  could  not  but  write  down,  on  the  defign,  nature', 
 and  end  of  Chrifiianity. 
 
 Wednefday,  November  2.  Was  ftill  more  indifpofed  in 
 body,  and  in  much  pain,  moft  of  the  day :  had  not  much 
 comfort ;  was  fcarcely  able  to  ftudy  at  all ;  and  ftill  entirely 
 alone  in  the  wildernefs.  But,  bleiled  be  the  Lord,  I  be  not 
 expofed  in  the  open  air,  I  have  a  houfe,  and  many  of  the 
 comforts  of  life,  to  fupport  me.  I  have  learned,  in  a  mea- 
 fure, that  all  good  things,  relating  both  to  time  and  eternity, 
 
 come   from  God. In  the  evening,    had  fome  degree  of 
 
 quickening  in  prayer :  I  think,  God  gave  m.e  fome  fenfe  of 
 his  prefence. 
 
 Thurfday,  Novem.ber  3.  Spent  this  day  in  fecret  falling 
 and  prayer,  from  morning  till  night.  Early  in  the  morning, 
 had  (I  think)  fome  fmall  degree  of  alTiflance  in  prayer.  After- 
 wards, read  the  ftory  of  Elijah  the  prophet,  i  Kings  xvii. 
 xviii.  and  xix  chapters,  and  alfo  2  Kings  ii.  and  iv  chapters. 
 My  foul  was  much  moved,  cbfervingthe  faith,  zeal,  and  power 
 of  that  holy  man;  how  he  wrellled  with  God  in  prayer,  dc 
 My  foul  then  cried  with  EHfha,  "  Where  is  the  Lord  God  of 
 
 Elijah  !"  Oh,  I  longed  for  more  faith  !  My  foul  breathed 
 after  God,  and  pleaded  with  him,  that  a  "  double  portion  of 
 
 "  that 
 
S8  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F  J.D.  174J. 
 
 *'  that  fpirit,"  which  was  given  to  Elijah,  might  "reft  on  me." 
 And  that  which  was  divinely  refrefhing  and  ftrengthening  to 
 my  foul,  was,  I  faw  that  God  is  the  Jame  that  he  was  in  the 
 
 days   of  Elijah. Was   enabled  to   wreftle   with    God  by 
 
 prayer,  in  a  more  affeftionate,  fervent,  humble,  intenfe,  and 
 importunate  manner,  than  I  have  for  many  months  part.  No- 
 thing leemed  too  hard  for  God  to  perform ;  nothing  too  great 
 
 for  me  to  hope  for  from  him. 1  had  for  many  months 
 
 entirely  loft  all  hopes  of  being  made  inftrumental  of  doing  any 
 fpecial  fervice  for  God  in  the  world ;  it  has  appeared  entirely 
 impoflible,  that  one  fo  black  and  vile  fhould  be  thus  improved 
 for   God.     But  at  this  time   God  was  pleafed  to  revive  this 
 
 hope. Afterwards  read  the  iiid  chapter  of  Exodus  and  on 
 
 to  the  xxth,  and  faw  more  of  xh&  glory  and  majefiy  of  God 
 difcovered  in  thofe  chapters,  than  ever  I  had  feen  before  ; 
 frequently  in  the  mean  time  tailing  on  my  knees,  and  crying 
 to  God  f  jr  the  faith  of  Mofcs,  and  for  a  manifeftation  of  the 
 divine  glory.  Efpecially  the  iiid  and  ivth,  and  part  of  the 
 xivth  and  xvth  chapters,  were  unfpeakably  fweet  to  my  foul: 
 my  foul  blcfted  God,  that  he  had  Ihewn  himfelf  fo  gracious 
 to  his  fervants  of  old.  The  xvth  chapter  fcemed  to  be  the 
 very  language  which  my  foul  uttered  to  God  in  the  feafon  of 
 my  firft  ipiritual  comfort,  when  I  had  juft  got  through  the 
 Redfta,  by  a  ivay  that  I  had  no  expe(51:ation  of.  O  how  my 
 foul  then  rejoiced  In  God!  And  now  thofe  things  came  freih 
 and  lively  to  my  mind ;  now  my  loul  blefted  God  afrefti,  that 
 he  had  opened  that  unthought-of  way  to  deliver  me  from  the 
 
 fear  of  the   Egyptians,  when  I  almoft  defpaired  of  life. 
 
 Afterwards  read  the  ftory  of  Abraham's  pilgrimage  in  the  land 
 •f  Canaan:  my  foul  was  melted,  in  obferving  his  faith,  how 
 he  leaned  on  God  ;  how  he  communed  with  God,  and  what  a 
 J}r anger  he  was  here  in  the  world.  After  that,  read  the  ftory 
 of  Jofeph's  fufferings,  and  God's  goodncfs  to  him :  blelTed 
 God  for  thefe  examples  of  faith  and  patience.  My  foul  was 
 ardent  in  prayer,  was  enabled  to  wreftle  ardently  for  myfelf, 
 for  Chriftian  friends,  and  for  the  church  of  God.  And  felt 
 more  defirc  to  fee  the  power  of  God  in  the  converfion  of 
 jbuls,  than  I  have  done  for  a  long  feafon.  Blefled  be  God  for 
 this  feafon  of  fafting  and  prayer!  May  his  goodnefs  always 
 abide  with  me,  and  draw  my  foul  to  him  ! 
 
 Thurfday,  November  4.  Rode  to  Kinderhook  ;  went  quite 
 to  Hudfon's  River,  about  tv/enty  miles  from  my  houfe ;  per- 
 formed fome  bufinefs ;  and  returned  home  in  the  evening  to 
 any  own  houfe.     I  had  rather  ride  hard,  and  fatigue  myfelf, 
 
 t* 
 
iE^.  1^.      Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  8^ 
 
 to  get  home,  than  to  fpend  the  evening  and  night  amongft 
 thofe  that  have  no  regard  for  God. 
 
 [The  two  next  days,  he  was  very  ill,  and  full  of  pain_, 
 probably  through  his  riding  in  the  night,  after  a  fatiguing 
 day's  journey  on  Thurfday  :  but  yet  fcems  to  have  been  dili* 
 gent  in  bulinefs.] 
 
 Monday,  November  7.  This  morning  the  Lord  afforded 
 me  fome  fpecial  alTiftance  in  prayer ;  my  mind  was  folemn, 
 fixed,  aifetRiionate,  and  ardent  in  defires  after  holinefs  ;  and 
 felt  full  of  tendernel's  and  love  ;  and  my  affeftions  iccmcd  to 
 
 be   diifolved  into   kindnefs  and  foftnefs. In  the  evening, 
 
 enjoyed  the  fame  comfortable  afliftance  in  prayer,  as  in  the 
 morning:  my  fopl  longed  after  God,  and  cried  to  him  with 
 a  filial  freedom,  reverence,  and  boldnefs.  O  that  I  iright  be 
 entirely  confecrated  and  devoted  to  God  J 
 
 [The  two  next  days,  he  complains  of  bodily  illnefs  and 
 pain  ;  but  much  more  of  Spiritual  barreunefs  and  unprofitable 
 nefs.] 
 
 Thurfday,  November  10.  Spent  this  day  in  farting  and 
 prayer  alone.  In  the  morning,  was  very  dull  and  lifelefs ; 
 ■was  fomething  melancholy  and  difcouraged.  But  after  fome 
 time,  reading  2  Kings  xix  chapter,  my  foul  was  moved  and 
 affeifled;  efpecially  reading  verf.  14.  and  onward.  I  faw 
 there  was  no  other  way  for  the  aiflifted  children  of  God  to 
 take,  but  to  go  to  God  with  all  their  forrows.  Hezekiah,  in 
 his  great  difbefs,  went  and  fpread  his  complaint  before  the 
 Lord.  I  was  then  enabled  to  fee  the  mighty  power  of  God, 
 and  my  extreme  need  of  that  power :  was  enabled  to  cry  to 
 God  affedlionately  and  ardently   for  his  divine  power  and 
 
 grace  to  be  exercifed  towards  me. Afterwards,  read  the 
 
 itory  of  David's  trials,  and  obferved  the'Tourle  he  took  un- 
 der them,  how  he  flrengthencd  his  hands  in  God ;  whereby 
 my  foul  was  carried  out  after  God,  enabled  to  cry  to  him,  and 
 rely  upon  him,  and  fell  flrong^  in  the  Lord.  Was  afterwards 
 refrefhed,  obferving  the  bkffed  temper  that  was  wrought  111 
 David  by  his  trials:  all  bicternefs,  and  defire  of  revenge,  feem- 
 ed  wholly  taken  away  ;  fo  that  he  mourned  for  the  death  of 
 
 his  enemies;  2  Sam.  i.  17.  and  iv.  9.  ad  fin. Was  enabled 
 
 to  blefs  God,  that  he  had  given  mc  fomething  of  this  divine 
 temper,  that  my  foul  freely  forgives,  and  heartily  hvts  my 
 enemies. 
 
 M  '[It 
 
^o  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F  J.  D.  1743. 
 
 [It  appears  by  his  diary  for  the  remaining  part  of  this  week, 
 and  for  the  two  following  weeks,  that  great  part  of  the  time 
 he  was  very  ill,  and  full  of  pain  ;  and  yet  obliged,  through  his 
 circu'iiftances,  in  this  ill  ftate  of  body,  to  be  at  great  fatigues, 
 in  labour,  and  travelling  day  and  night,  and  to  expofe  himfelf 
 in  ftoriny  and  fevere  feafons.  He  from  time  to  time,  within 
 this  fpace,  fpeaks  of  outgoings  of  foul  after  God  ;  his  heart 
 flrengthened  in  God ;  feafons  of  divine  fweetnefs  and  com- 
 fort ;  his  heart  afFeflsd  with  gratitude  for  mercies,  dc.  And 
 yet  there  arc  many  complaints  of  lifeleffnefs,  weaknefs  of  grace,' 
 diftance  from  God,  and  great  unprofitablenefs.  But  ftiil  there 
 appears  a  conftant  care,  from  day  to  day,  not  to  lofe  time^ 
 but  to  improve  it  all  for  God.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  November  27.  In  the  evening,  was  greatly  af- 
 fefVed  in  reading  an  account  of  the  very  joyful  death  of  2 
 pijus  gentleman;  which  fccmed  to  invigorate  my  foul  in 
 God's  ways  :  I  felt  courageoufiy  engaged  to  purfue  a  life  of 
 holinefs  and  felf-denial  as  long  as  I  live  ;  and  poured  out  my 
 foul  to  God  for  his  help  and  alTiftance  in  order  thereto.  Eter- 
 nity then  feemed  near,  and  my  foul  rejoiced,  and  longed  to 
 meet  it.  O,  I  trufl,  that  will  be  a  blelTed  day,  that  finifhcs 
 my  toil  here ! 
 
 Monday,  November  28.  In  the  evening,  was  obliged  to 
 fpend  time  in  company  and  convcrfation  that  was  unprofitable. 
 
 Nothing  lies  heavier  upon  me,  than  the  mifimproTcment 
 
 of  time. 
 
 Tuefday,  November  29.  Began  to  ftudy  the  Indian  tongue, 
 
 with  Mr  Sergeant  at  Stockbridge  *. Was  perplexed  for 
 
 want  of  more  retirement.^ 1  love  to  live  alone  in  my  own 
 
 little  cottage,  where  I  can  fpend  much  time  in  prayer,  6c. 
 
 Wcdnefday,  November  30.  Purfued  my  ftudy  of  Indian: 
 but  was  very  v.'e'ak  and  difordered  in  body,  and  was  troubled 
 in  mind  at  the  barrennefs  of  the  day,  that  I  had  done  fo  little 
 for  God.  I  had  fome  enlargement  in  prayer  at  night.  Oh,  a 
 barn,  or  liable,  hedge,  or  any  other  "place,  is  trvdy  defirablc, 
 if  God  is  there  !   Sometimes,  of  late,  my  hopes  of  Zion's  pro- 
 
 *  The  ccmmlffioners  that  employed  hira,  had  direfled  him  te 
 fpend  much  time  this  winter  with  Mr  Sergeant,  to  learn  the  lan- 
 guage of  the  Indians  ;  which  neceflitatcd  him  very  often  to  ride, 
 backwards  and  forwards,  twenty  miles  through  the  uninhabited 
 woods  between  Stockbridge  and  Kaunaumeek ;  which  many  times 
 expofed  him  to  extreme  hardfhip  in  the  fetere  feafons  of  the 
 ■winter. 
 
 fperity 
 
VE/.  26.      Mr    DAVID     BRAINERD.  jr 
 
 fpcrity  are  more  raifed,  than  they  were  in  the  Summer  paft. 
 ?vly  foul  feems  to  confide  in  God,  that  he  will  yet  **  fhew 
 **  forth  his  falvation"  to  his  people,  and  make  Zion  "  the 
 *' joy  of  the  whole  earth.  O  how  excellent  is  the  loving- 
 *'  icindnefs  of  the  Lord  !'*  My  foul  fometimcs  inwardly  ex- 
 ults at  the  lively  thoughts  of  what  God  has  already  done  for 
 his  church,  and  what  "  mine  eyes  have  feen  of  the  falvation 
 "  of  God."  It  is  fweet,  to  hear  nothing  but  fpiritual  dif. 
 courfc  from  God's  children ;  and  finners  "  enquiring  the  way 
 "  to  Zion,"  faying,  "  What  fliall  we  do?"  6c.  O  that  I  may 
 fee  more  of  this  bleflcd  work ! 
 
 Thurfday,  December  i.  Both  morning  and  evening,  I  en- 
 joyed fome  intenfenefs  of  foul  in  prayer,  and  longed  for  the 
 enlargement  of  Chrifl's  kingdom  in  the  world.  My  foul  feems, 
 of  late,  to  wait  on  God  for  his  bleffing  on  Zion.  O  that  re- 
 ligion might  powerfully  revive! 
 
 Friday,  December  2.  Enjoyed  not  fo  much  health  of  bo- 
 dy, or  fervour  of  mind,  as  yefterday.  If  the  chariot-wheels 
 move  with  eafe  and  fpecd  at  any  time,  for  a  fliort  fpace ;  yet 
 by  and  by  they  drive  heavily  again.  "■  O  that  I  had  the  wings 
 "  of  a  dove,  that  I  might  fly  away"  from  fin  and  corruption, 
 and  be  at  reji  in  Cod! 
 
 Saturday,    December  3.    Rode  home    to  my  houfe    and 
 
 people.     Suffered  much  with  the  extreme  cold. 1  truft,  I 
 
 fhall  ere  long  arrive  fafe  to  my  journey's  end,'  where  my  toils 
 fliall  ceafe. 
 
 Lord's  day,  December  4.  Had  but  little  fenfe  of  divine  and 
 heavenly  things.  My  foul  mourns  over  my  barrenncfs.  Oh 
 how  fad  is  fpiritual  deadnefs ! 
 
 Monday,  December  5.  Rode  to  Stockbridge.  Was  almoft 
 outdone  with  the  extreme  cold.  Had  fome  refrelhing  medi- 
 tations by  the  way ;  but  was  barren,  wandering,  and  lifelefs, 
 much  of  the  day.  Thus  my  days  roll  away,  with  but  little 
 ,done  for  God ;  and  this  is  my  burden. 
 
 Tuefday,  December  6.  Was  perplexed  to  fee  the  vanity 
 and  levity  of  profefled  Chriftians.  Spent  the  evening  with  a 
 Chriftian  friend,  that  was  able  in  fome  meafure  to  fympathize 
 with  me  in  my  fpiritual  conflicts.  Was  a  little  refrefhed  to 
 find  one  with  whom  I  could  converfe  oi  imvard  trials,  &c. 
 
 Wednefday,  December  7.  Spent  the  evening  in  perplexity, 
 with  a  kind  of  guilty  indolence.  When  I  have  no  heart  or. 
 refolution  for  God,  and  the  duties  incumbent  on  me,  I  feel 
 guilty  of  negligence  and  mifimprovemcnt  of  time.  Certainly 
 I  ought  to  be  engaged  in  ray  v/ork  and  bufmefs,  to  the  utmolt 
 extent  of  my  flrength  and  ability. 
 
 M  2  Thurfday, 
 
92  T  I-I  E     L  I  r  E     O  r  J.D.  1743, 
 
 Thurriay,  December  8.  My  mind  was  much  diftrafted  with 
 ^JifFercnt  afleiVions.  Seemed  to  be  at  ?n  amazing  diflance  from 
 God:  and  looking  round  in  the  world,  to  fee  if  there  was 
 not  fome  happlncis  to  be  derived  from  it,  God,  and  fomc 
 certain  objeifts  in  the  world,  fcemed  each  to  invite  my  heart 
 and  afre(Jlions ;  and  my  foul  feemed  to  be  diftrafted  between 
 them.  J  have  not  been  fo  m.uch  befct  with  the  world  for  a 
 long  time;  and  that  with  relation  to  fome  particular  objects 
 which  I  thought  myfelf  moft  dead  to.  But  even  while  I  was 
 dcfiring  to  pleafe  myfelf  with  any  thing  below,  guilt,  forrow, 
 and  perplexity,  attended  the  firft  motions  of  delire.  Indeed  I 
 rannot  fee  tiie  appearance  of  pleafure  and  happinefs  in  the 
 world,  as   I  ufed  10  dJ  :  and  blcfTed  be  God  for  any  habitual 
 
 deadnefs  to  the  world. 1  found  no  peace,  or  deliverance 
 
 from  this  diflraclicn  and  perplexity  of  mind,  till  1  found  ac- 
 cefa  to  the  throne  of  grace :  and  as  foon  as  I  had  any  fenle  of 
 God,  and  things  divine,  the  allurements  of  the  world  vanifhed, , 
 rind  my  l:cart  was  determined  for  God.     But  my  f  ul  mourn- 
 ed 0"fer  mv'  folly,  that  I  fhould  defne  any  pleafure,  but  only  ia  1 
 God.     God  forgive  my.  fpiritual  idolatry  1 
 
 [The  next  thirteen  days,  he  appears  to  have  been  conti- 
 Tiually  in  deep  concern  about  the  improvement  of  precious  time ; 
 rnd  tht're  are  many  exprelTions  of  grief,  that  he  improved 
 time  no  better  ;  fuch  as,  "  Oh,  what  mifery  do  I  feel,  when 
 *'  my  thoughts  rove  after  vanity  !  I  fliould  be  happy  if  ahvays 
 "  engacjed  for  God  !  O  wretched  man  that  I  am  !"  <6c.  Speaks 
 of  his'  being  pained -w  ith  a  fenfe  of  hi?  barrennefs,  perplexed 
 with  his  waoderingb,  longing  for  deliverance  from  the  being 
 of  fin,  mourning  that  time  pafTed  away,  and  fo  little  was  done 
 
 for    God,  Cr. On   Tucfday,  December  20.  he  fpeaks  of 
 
 bib  bchifj  vilited  at  Kaunaumeek  by  fomc  under  fpiritual  con- 
 cern.} 
 
 ThmTJay,  December  22.  Spent  this  day  alone  in  fafting 
 and  prayer,  and  reading  in  God's  word  the  excrcifes  and  deli- 
 verances of  God's  children.  Had,  1  truft,  fome  cxerclfe  of 
 faith,  and  realizing  itpprehtnfion  of  divine  power,  grace,  and 
 holinels;  and  alfo  01  ihe  unchangeablenefs  of  God,  that  he  is 
 the  fame  as  he  was  when  he  delivered  Ins  fiiints  of  old  out  of 
 great  tribulation.  A'y  foul  was  fundry  tim.es  in  prayer  cn- 
 la-ged  foi  God's  chuich  and  people.  O  that  Zion  might  be- 
 come the  "  joy  of  the  whole  earth  I"  It  is  better  to  wait  up- 
 on God  v.'ith  patience*  than  to  put  confidence  in  any  thing  in 
 
 this 
 
JEt.^6.         M  R    D  A  V  1 1)     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  95 
 
 this  lower  world.     "  My  foul,  wait  thou  on  the  Lord ;  for 
 *'  from  him  comes  thy  falvation." 
 
 Friday,  December  23.  Felt  a  little  more  courage  and  re- 
 folution  in  religion,  than  at  fome  other  times. 
 
 Saturday,  December  24.  Had  fome  affiflance,  and  longing 
 defires  after  fandlification,  in  prayer  this  day ;  efpecially  in 
 the  evening:  was  fenfible  of  my  own  weaknefs  and  fpirituai 
 impotency  :  faw  plainly,  I  fhould  fall  into  fin,  if  God  of  his 
 abundant  mercy  did  not  "  uphold  my  foul,  and  with-hold  me 
 "  irom  evil."  O  that  God  would  "  uphold  me  by  his  free 
 '*  Spirit,  and  fave  me  from  the  hour  of  temptation!" 
 
 Lord's  day,  December  25.  Prayed  much,  in  the  morning, 
 with  a  feeling  fenfe  of  my  own  fpirituai  weaknefs  and  inluf-  . 
 ficiency  for  any  duty.  God  gave  mc  fome  afliftance  in  preach- 
 ing to  the  Indians;  and  efpecially  in  the  afternoon,  when  I 
 "was  en^ibled  to  fpcak  with  uncommon  plainnefs,  freedom, 
 and  earneftncfs.  Blefled  be  God  for  any  alTiftance  granted  to 
 one  fo  unworthy.  Afterwards  felt  fome  thankfulnefs ;  but 
 ftill  fenfible  of  barrennefs. Spent  fome  time  in  the  even- 
 ing, with  one  or  two  perfons  under  fpirituai  concern,  and 
 exhorting  others  to  their  duty,  <6c. 
 
 Mondaj^  December  26.  Rode  down  to  Stockbridge.  Was 
 very  much  fatigued  with  my  journey,  wherein  I  underwent 
 great  hardfhip :  was  much  expofed  and  very  wet  by  falling 
 into  a  river.  Spent  the  day  and  evening  without  much  fenfe 
 of  divine  and  heavenly  things ;  but  felt  guilty,  grieved,  and 
 perplexed  with  wandering,   carelefs  thoughts. 
 
 Tuefday,  December  27.  Had  a  fmall  degree  of  warmth  la 
 fecret  prayer,  in  the  evening;  but,  alas!  had  but  little  fpi- 
 rituai life,  and  confequently  but  little  comfort.  Oh,  the 
 preifure  of  a  body  'jf  death  *  / 
 
 Wednefday,  December  28.  Rode  about  fix  miles  to  the 
 ordination  of  Mr  Hopkins.  In  the  feafon  of  the  folem.nity 
 Was  fomewhat  affefted  with  a  fenfe  of  the  greatnefs  and  im- 
 portance of  the  work  of  a  minifter  of  Chrift.  Afterwards 
 was  grieved  to  fee  the  vanity  of  the  multitude.  In  the  even- 
 ing, fpent  a  little  time  with  fome  Chriflian  friends,  witk 
 fome  degree  of  fatisfa6lion  ;  but  mofi:  of  the  time,  had  rather 
 have  been  alone. 
 
 Thurfday,  December  29.  Spent  the  day  mainly  in  con- 
 X'crfing  with  friends ;  yet  enjoyed  little  fatisfaflion,  becaufc 
 I  could  find  but  few  dilpofcd  to  converfe  of  divine  and  heaven- 
 
 *  This  day  he  wrote  tlie  fuccnd  Iciier  added  at  ihc  end  of  this 
 hlrtory. 
 
94  THELIFEOF  A.D,  1743—4. 
 
 ly  things.  Alas,  what  are  things  of  this  world,  to  afford 
 fatisfaftion  to  the  foul ! — Near  night,  returned  to  Stockbridge ; 
 in  fecrot  blefled  God  for  retirement,  and  that  I  be  not  always 
 cxpofed  to  the  compaRy  and  converfation  of  the  world.  O 
 that  I  could  live  **in  the  fecret  of  God's  prefence  !" 
 
 Friday,  December.  30.  Was  in  a  folemn  devout  frame  in 
 the  evening.  Wondered  that  earth,  with  all  its  charms, 
 fhould  ever  allure  me  in  the  leaft  degree.  O  that  I  could  al- 
 ways realize  the  being  and  holinefs  of  God ! 
 
 Saturday,  December  31.  Rode  from  Stockbridge  home  to 
 my  houfe  :  the  air  was  clear  and  calm,  but  as  cold  as  ever  I 
 felt  it  in  the  world,  or  near.  I  was  in  great  danger  of  perifti- 
 ing  by  the  extremity  of  the  feafon. Was  enabled  to  me- 
 ditate much  on  the  road. 
 
 Lord's  day,  January  i.  1743-4.  In  the  morning,  had  fome 
 fmall  degree  of  aififtanee  in  prayer.  Saw  myfelf  fo  vile  and 
 unworthy,  that  I  could  not  look  my  people  in  the  face,  when 
 I  came   to  preach.       Oh,    my  meannefs,    folly,   ignorance, 
 
 and   inward  pollution! In  the  evening,  had  a  little  affift- 
 
 ance  in  prayer,  fo  that  the  duty  was  delightfome,  rather 
 than  burdcnfome.  Reflefted  on  the  goodnefs  of  God  to  me 
 in  the  pafl  year,  <bc.  Of  a  truth  God  has  been  kind  and 
 gracious  to  me,  though  he  has  caufed  me  to  pafs  through 
 many  forrows  ;  he  has  provided  for  me  bountifully,  fo  that  \ 
 have  been  enabled,  in  about  fifteen  months  paft,  to  beftow 
 to  charitable  ufes  about  an  hundred  founds  New-England 
 money,  that  I  can  now  remember  *.  BlefTed  be  the  Lord, 
 that  has  fo  far  ufed  me  as  his  fte'^uardy  to  diftribute  z  portion 
 of  his  goods.  May  I  always  remember,  that  all  I  have  comes 
 from  God.  BlelTed  be  the  Lord,  that  has  carried  me  through 
 all  the  toils,  fatigues,  and  hardihips  of  the  year  pafl,  as  well 
 as  the   fpiritual   forrows   and  conflifls  that  have  attended  it. 
 
 0  that  I  could  begin  this  year  ivith  God,  and  fpend  the 
 whole  of  it  to  his  glory,  either  in  life  or  death  I 
 
 Monday,  January  2.  Had  fome  affecting  fenfe  of  my  own 
 impotency  and  fpiritual  weakne'fs. — It  is  nothing  but  the 
 power  of  God  that  keeps  me  from  all  manner  of  wickcdnefs. 
 
 1  fee,  /  am  nothing,  and  cj^a  do  nothing  without  help  from 
 
 *  Which  was,  I  fuppofe,  to  the  value  of  about  one  hundred  and 
 eighty- fivi  petinds  in  our  bills  of  the  old  tenor,  as  they  now  pafs. — 
 By  this,  -as  well  as  many  other  things,  it  is  manifeft,  that  his  fre- 
 quent melancholy  did  not  arife  from  the  confideration  of  any  difad- 
 ▼antage  he  v/as  laid  under  to  get  a  living  in  the  world,  by  his  ex- 
 pulfion  from  the  college. 
 
 above. 
 
jEm6.         Mr    DAVID     BRAINERD.  95 
 
 above.  Oh,  for  divine  gtace !  In  the  evening,  had  fome  ar- 
 dour of  foul  in  prayer,  and  longing  dcfircs  to  have  God  for 
 my  guide  and  fafeguard  at  all  times  *. 
 
 Tucfday,  January  3.  Was  employed  much  of  the  day  in 
 writing ;  and  fpent  fome  time  in  other  necefTary  employment. 
 But  my  time  pafles  away  fo  fwiftly,  that  I  am  aftonifhed 
 when  I  reflect  on  it,  and  fee  how  little  I  do  in  it.  My  ftate 
 of  folitudc  does  not  make  the  hours  hang  heavy  upon  my 
 hands.  O  what  reafon  of  thankfulnefs  have  I  on  account  of 
 this  retirement!  I  find,  that  I  do  not,  and  it  feems  I  cannot, 
 lead  a  Chrflian  life,  when  I  am  abroad,  and  cannot  fpend 
 time  in  devotion,  Chriftian  converfation,  and  ferious  medita- 
 tion, as  I  fhould  do.  Thofe  weeks  that  I  am  obliged  now 
 to  be  from  home,  in  order  to  learn  the  Indian  tongue,  arc 
 moftly  fpent  in  perplexity  and  barrenncfs,  without  much 
 fweet  reUih  of  divine  things ;  and  I  feel  myfelf  a  flranger  at 
 the  throne  of  grace,  for  want  of^ore  frequent  and  continued 
 retirement.  When  I  return  home,  and  give  myfelf  to 
 meditation,  prayer,  and  fading,  a  new  fcene  opens  to  my 
 mind,  and  my  foul  longs  for  mortification,  felf-denial,  humi- 
 lity, and  divorcement  from  all  the  things  of  the  world.  This 
 evening,  my  heart  was  fomewhat  warm  and  fervent  in  prayer 
 and  meditation,  fo  that  I  was  loth  to  indulge  fleep.  Con- 
 tinued in  thofe  duties  till  about  midnight. 
 
 Wednefday,  January  4.  Was  in  a  refigned  and  mortified 
 temper  of  mind,  much  of  the  day.  Time  appeared  a  wo- 
 mmty  life  a  vnpour,  and  all  its  enjoyments  as  empty  kubBles, 
 and  fleeting  blafls  of  wind. 
 
 Thurfday,  January  5.  Had  a  humbling  and  prefling  fenfc 
 of  my  unworthinefs.  My  fenfe  of  the  badnefs  of  my  own 
 heart  filled  my  foul  with  bitternefs  and  anguifh ;  which  was 
 ready  to  fink,  as  under  the  weight  of  a  heavy  burden.  And 
 thus  fpent  the  evening,  till  late. — Was  fomewhat  intenfe  and 
 ardent  in  prayer. 
 
 Friday,  January  6.  Feeling,  and  confidering  my  extreme 
 weaknefs,  and  want  of  grace,  the  pollution  of  my  foul,  and 
 danger  of  temptations  on  every  fide,  I  fet  apart  this  day  for 
 falling  and  prayer,  neither  eating  nor  drinking  from  evening 
 to  evening,  befeeching  God  to  have  mercy  on  me.  And  my 
 foul  intenfely  longed,  that  the  dreadful  fpots  and  ftains  of  fia 
 might  be  wafhed  away  from  it.  Saw  fomething  of  the  power 
 and  allfufficicncy  of  God.     My  foul  feemed  to  reft  on  his 
 
 •  This  day  he  wrote  the  tiird  letter,  publifncd  at  the  end  of 
 tkis  accouatof  his  life. 
 
 p®wcr 
 
96  T  H  E     L  I  r  E     O  F  jf.  D.  1744. 
 
 power  and  grace  ;  longed  for  rcflgnation  to  his  will,  and  mor- 
 tification to  ail  things  here  below.  My  mind  was  greatly  fixed 
 on  divine  things .  my  refoiutions  for  a  life  of  mortification, 
 continual  watchfulnefs,  felf-denial,  ferioulnefs,  and  devotion 
 to  God,  were  llrong  and  fixed  ;  my  delircs  ardent  and  in- 
 ttn^c,  my  conicience  tender,  and  afraid  of  every  appearance 
 of  evil.  My  foul  grieved  with  the  refieftion  on  paif  levity, 
 and  want  of  refolution  for  God.  I  folemnly  renewed  my  de- 
 dication of  myfcif  to  God,  and  longed  for  grace  to  enable  me 
 always  to  keep  covenant  with  hnn.  Time  appeared  very 
 fhort,  eternity  near ;  and  a  great  name,  either  in  or  after  life, 
 together  with  all  earthly  pleafures  and  profits,  but  an  empty 
 bubble,  a  deluding  dieam. 
 
 Saturday,  January  7.  Spent  this  day  in  ferioufnefs,  with 
 fledfaft  refoiutions  for  God  and  a  life  of  mortification.  Stu- 
 died clofely,  till  I  felt  my  bodily  ftrength  fail.  Felt  fome  de- 
 gree of  refignation  to  God,  with  an  acquiefcence  in  his  dit 
 penfations.     Was  grieved,  that  I  could  do  fo  little  for  God 
 
 before  my  bodily  ftrength  failed. In  the  evening,  though 
 
 tired,  yet  was  enabled  to  continue  inftant  in  prayer  for  fome 
 time.  Spent  the  time  in  reading,  meditation,  and  prayer,  till 
 the  evening  was  far  fpent :  was  grieved,  to  think  that  I  could 
 
 not  ivatch  urite  prayer  the  whole  night. But  blclFcd  be 
 
 God,  heaven  is  a  place  of  continual  and  incefl'ant  devoti«n, 
 though  earth  is  dull. 
 
 [The  fix  days  following,  he  continued  in  the  fame  happy 
 frame  of  mind;  enjoyed  the  fame  compolure,  calmnefs,  re- 
 fignation,  ardent  defire,  and  fweet  fervency  of  fpirir,  in  a 
 high  degree,  every  day,  not  one  excepted.  Thurfday,  this 
 week,  he  kept  as  a  day  of  fecret  fafting  and  prayer.] 
 
 Saturday,  January  14.  This  morning,  enjoyed  a  moft  fo- 
 lemn  feafon  in  prayer:  my  foul  feemed  enlarged,  and  a/Tifted 
 to  pour  out  itfelf  to  God  for  grace,  and  for  every  blefiing  I 
 wanted,  for  myfelf,  my  dear  Chriftian  friends,  and  for  the 
 church  of  God  ;  and  was  fo  enabled  10  fee  him  who  is  iuvijible, 
 that  my  foul  refted  upon  him  for  the  performance  of  every 
 thing  I  alkcd  agreeable  to  his  will.  It  was  then  my  happi- 
 nefs,  to  "continue  inftant  in  prayer,"  and  was  enabled  to  con- 
 tinue in  it  for  near  an  hour.  My  foul  was  then  "  ftrong  in 
 *'  the  Lord,  and  in  the  power  of  his  might."  Longed  ex- 
 ceedingly for  angelic  holinefs  and  purity,  and  to  have  all  my 
 thoughts,  at  all  times,  employed  in  divine  and  heavenly 
 fhings.     O  how  biefTed  is  an  heavenly  temper !     O  how  un- 
 
 fpeakably 
 
j^/.  26.      Mr.    D  A  V  I  D     B  R  A  I  N  E  R' D.  0 
 
 fpeakably  blefFed  it  is,  to  feci  a  raeafure  of  than  rcclitiide,  in 
 which  we  were  at  firfl:  created  ! — Felt  the  fame  divine  a/Tift^ 
 ance  in  prayer  fundry  times  in  the  day.  My  foul  confided  in 
 God  for  myielf,  and  for  his  Zion ;  trufted  in  divine  power 
 and  grace,  th^t  he  v/ould  do  glorious  things  in  his  church  on 
 «arth,  for  his  own  glory. 
 
 [The  next  day  he  fpcaks  of  fome  gllmpfes  he  had  of  the 
 divine  glories,  and  of  his  being  enabK  d  to  maintain  his  refo- 
 lutions  in  fomemeafure;  but  complains,  that  he  could  not 
 draw  near  to  God  :  feems  to  be  filled  with  trembling  fears  left 
 he  lliould  return  to  a  life  of  vanity,  to  pleafe  himfelf  with 
 fome  of  the  enjoyments  of  this  lower  world  ;  and  fpeaks  of 
 his  being  much  troubled,  and  feeling  guilty,  tliat  he  fhouidad- 
 drefs  immortal  fouls  with  no  more  ardency  and  d^inc  of  their 
 faivation. —  On  ?»'londay,  he  rode  dov.'n  to  Sr.ockbiidge,  vvasdl- 
 llreffed  with  the  extreme  cold:  but  notwithflanding,  l.U  rnii.;! 
 was  in  a  devout  and  folcmn  frame  in  his  journey.  Tlie  four 
 next  days,  he  was  very  ill,  probably  by  his  fufiering  from  the 
 cpld  in  his  journey;  yet  he  fays  he  fpent  the  time  in  a  more 
 fjlemn  manner  than  he  feared.  On  Friday-evening,  he  rode 
 down  and  vifited  Mr  Hopkins ;  and  on  Saturday,  rode  eigh- 
 teen miles  to  Solibury,  where  he  kept  Sabbath,  and  enjoyed 
 confiderable  degrees  of  God's  gracious  prcfjnce,  afliltance  iii 
 duty,  and  divine  comfort  and  refrcfhraent,  longing  to  give 
 himfelf  wholly  to  God,  to  be  his  for  ever.] 
 
 Monday,  January  23.  I  think  I  never  felt  more  rcHgned 
 to  God,  nor  fb  much  dead  to  the  world,  in  every  refpct^r,  ?s 
 now;  was  dead  to  all  defire  of  reputation  and  grcatnefs,  ci- 
 ther in  life,  or  after  death;  all  I  longed  for,  v/as  to  be  holy, 
 humble,  crucified  to  the  world,  dr. 
 
 Tuefday,  Januarj'  2^.  Near  noon,  rode  over  to  Canaan. 
 In  the  evening,  wr.s  uncspcftcdly  vifited  by  a  confidcrabie 
 number  of  people,  with  whom  I  was  enabled  to  convcrfe  pro- 
 fitably of  divine  things:  took  pains  to  defcribe  the  dilference 
 between  a  regular  and  irregular  felf-love;  the  one  confifang 
 with  a  fupreme  love  to  God,  but  the  other  not  ;  the  former 
 uniting  God's  glory,  and  the  foul's  happinefs,  that  thry  bet 
 come  one  common  intcrefi:,  but  the  latter  disjoining  and  fepa- 
 rating  God's  glory  and  the  man's  happinef:,  feeking  the  latter 
 with  a  negleft  of  the  former,  lliiiflirated  thii  by  that  genuine 
 love  that  is  found  between  the  (Ixcs;  which  is  diverfe  from 
 that  v»-hich  i^  wrought  up  towards  a  pcrfon  only  by  rational 
 arguments,  or  hope  of  fclf-intcrcfl.  Love  ia  r.  pl^afing  paflior. 
 
98  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  J.D.  1744. 
 
 k  afforda  plcafare  to  the  mind  where  it  is;  but  yet  true  ge- 
 nuine love  is  not,  nor  can  be  placed  upon  any  object  with 
 that  dellgn  of  pleafing  iti'tlf  with  the  feeling  of  it  in  a  man's 
 cwn  breail. 
 
 [On  Wednefday  he  rode  to  Sheffield;  the  next  day,  to 
 StockbriJge  ;  and  on  Saturday,  home  to  Kaunaumeek,  though 
 the  feafon  was  cold  and  (lormy  :  which  journey  was  followed 
 with  ilinefs  and  pain.  It  appears  by  his  diary,  that  he  fpent 
 the  time,  while  riding,  in  proHt.ible  meditations,  and  in  lift- 
 ing up  his  heart  to  God;  and  he  fpeaks  ofafTulance,  comfort, 
 and  rcfreflTiracnt ;  but  flill  complains  of  barrennefs,  6c.  His 
 diary  for  the  five  next  days  is  full  of  the  mofl  heavy  bitter 
 complaints ;  and  he  exprcffes  himfelf  as  full  of  fhame  and 
 fclf-loathing  for  his  lifelefs  temper  of  mind  and  lluggiih- 
 n^fs  of  fpirit,  and  as  being  in  perplexity  and  extremity,  and 
 appearing  to  himfelf  unfpeakably  vile  and  guilty  before  God, 
 on  account  of  fume  inv/ard  workings  of  corruption  he  found 
 in  his  heart,  dc] 
 
 Thurfday,  February  2.  Spent  this  day  in  falling  and 
 prayer,  fceking  the  prefence  and  affiftance  of  God,  that  he 
 would  enable  me  to  overcome  all  my  corruptions  and  fpiritual 
 enemies. 
 
 Friday,  February .3.  Enjoyed  more  freedom  and  comfort 
 than  of  late;  was  intenfely  engaged  in  meditation  upon  the 
 different  whifpers  of  the  various  powers  and  affeftions  of  a 
 pious  mind,  exercifed  with  a  great  variety  of  difpenfations: 
 and  could  not  but  write,  as  well  as  meditate,  on  fo  entertaining 
 a  fubjed:  *.  I  hope,  the  Lord  gave  me  fome  true  fenfc  of 
 divine  things  this  day :  but,  alas,  how  great  and  prefTmg  are 
 the  remains  of  indwelling  corruption !  I  am  now  more  fenlible 
 than  ever,  that  God  alone  is  "  the  author  and  finifher  of  our 
 "  faith,"  i.  e.  that  the  whole,  and  every  part  of  fan£lifica- 
 tion,  and  everj'^  good  v;ord,  work,  or  thought,  that  is  found 
 in  me,  Is  the  elTect  of  liis  power  and  grace;  that,  "  without 
 "  him  I  can  do  nothing,"  in  the  flricleft  fenfe,  and  that,  "  he 
 ''  works  in  us  to  will  and  to  do  of  his  own  good  pleafure," 
 and  from  no  other  motive.  Oh,  bow  amazing  it  is  that  people 
 can  talk  fo  much  about  mens  power  and  goodnefs ;  when,  if 
 God  did  not  hold  us  back  every  moment,  we  fhould  be  devils 
 
 *  I  find  what  he  wrote  on  this  head  among  his  papers  that  were 
 left  in  my  hand,  and  it  is  here  publiflied  at  the  end  of  this  account 
 6f  his  life. 
 
 incarnate  f 
 
Mf.26,       Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  99 
 
 incarnate  1     This  my  bitter  experience,  for   fevcral  days  laft 
 pad,  has  abundantly  taught  me  concerning  myfelf. 
 
 Saturday,  February  4.  Enjoyed  fome  degree  of  freedom 
 and  fpiritual  refrerhmtnt ;  was  enabled  to  pray  with  fome 
 fervency,  and  longing  defires  of  Zion's  prolpcrity,  and  my 
 faith  and  hope  feenis  to  take  hold  of  Cod,  for  the  performance 
 of  what  I  was  enabled  to  plead  for.  San^tilication  in  myfelf, 
 and  the  ingathering  of  God's  cleft,  was  all  my  defire  ;  and  the 
 hope  of  its  accomplishment,  all  my  joy. 
 
 Lord's  day,  February  5.  Was  enabled  in  fome  meafure  to 
 reft  and  confide  in  God,  and  to  prize  his  prefence,  and  fome 
 glimpfes  of  the  light  of  his  countenance,  above  ray  necclTary 
 food.  Thought  myfelf,  after  the  feafon  of  weaknefs,  temp- 
 tation, and  defertion  I  endured  the  lail  week,  to  be  fomewhat 
 like  Samfon,  when  his  locks  began  to  grow  again.  Was  en- 
 abled to  preach  to  my  people  with  more  life  and  warmth, 
 than  I  have  for  fome  weeks  paft. 
 
 Monday,  February  6.  This  morning,  my  foul  again  was 
 ilrcngthened  in  God,  and  found  fome  fweet'repofe  in  him  in 
 prayer;  longing  efpecially  for  the  complete  mortification  of 
 fenfuality  and  pride,  and  for  refignation  to  God's  difpenfa- 
 tions,  at  all  times,  as  through  grace  I  felt  it  at  this  time.  I 
 did  not  defire  deliverance  from  any  difficulty  that  attends 
 my  circumftances,  unlefs  God  was  willing.  O  how  comfort- 
 able is  this  temper! — Spent  moft  of  the  day  in  reading  God's 
 word,  in  w-iting,  and  prayer.  Enjoyed  repeated  and  frequent 
 comfort  and  intv-nfenefs  of  foul  in  prayer  through  the  day.  In 
 the  evening,  fpent  fome  hours  in  private  converfation  with 
 ray  people ;  and  afterwards,  felt  fome  warmth  in  fecret 
 prayer. 
 
 Tuefda}',  February  7.  Was  much  engaged  in  fome  fweet 
 meditations  on  the  pov/ers  and  afFedlions  of  the  godly  foul  in 
 their  purfuit  of  their  beloved  object:  wrote  fomething  of  the 
 native  language  of  fpiritual  fenfation,  in  its  foft  and  tender 
 whifpers ;  declaring,  that  it  now  '^  feels  and  taftes  that  the 
 "  Lord  is  gracious  •/'  that  he  is  the  fupreme  good,  the  only 
 foul-fatisfying  happinefs;  that  he  is  a  complete,  fufncient, 
 and  almighty  portion  :  faying, 
 
 *'  Whom  have  I  in  heaven  but  thee  ?  and  there  is  none  upon 
 "  earth  that  J  defire  he  fides  this  bleffed  portion.  O,  I  feel  it 
 **  is  heaven  to  pleafe  him,  and  to  be  jtift  what  he  would  bf.ve 
 *'  me  to  be  1  O  that  my  foul  were  holy,  as  he  is  holy !  O  that 
 "  it  were  pure,  even  as  ChriJ}  is  pure  ;  and  perfeui,  as  rry  Fa- 
 ''  ther  in  heaven  is  perfeii !  Thefe,  I  feel,  are  the  fweetcfl; 
 *'  commands  in  God's  book,  comprifing  ail  others.    And  ihall 
 
 M   2  "I 
 
too  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  A.D.  1744, 
 
 "  I  break  d-,eni !  muft  I  break  them!  am  I  u«dcr  a  nccciTity 
 *•'  of  it  as  long  as  J.  live  in  ihe  world!  C  rr-y  Ibul,  wo,  wp 
 '•  is  mc  that  1  am  a  finner,  becaufe  I  now  neccHarily  grieve 
 *'  and  offend  this  bkfied  God,  who  is  infinite  in  gcodncis  and 
 '"'  grace!  Oh,  methinks,  if  he  wonld  punifli  me  for  my  fms, 
 *'  \l  would  not  wound  my  heart  fo  deep  to  offend  him :  but 
 '^  though  I  lin  continually,  yet  he  continually  repeats  his 
 *'  Kindnefs  to  me!  Oh,  methinks  I  could  bear  any  luffering; 
 '^  but  how  can  I  bear  to  grieve  and  difhonour  this  bleiled 
 *"'  God !  How  fliali  I  yield  ten  thoufand  times  more  honour 
 "  to  him?  What  fhall  I  do  to  glorify  and  worfliip  this  beft 
 "  of  beings?  O  that  I  could  confecrate  myfelf,  foul  and  bo- 
 *'  dy,  to  his  fervicc  for  cvei !  O  that  I  could  give  up  myiclf 
 ''  to  him,  {o  as  never  more  to  attempt  to  be  my  own,  or  to 
 *'  have  any  will  or  aiiections  that  are  not  perfeftly  conform- 
 *'  ed  to  him!  But,  ala?,  alas !  I  find  I  cannot  be  thus  entire- 
 "  ly  devoted' to  God;  I  cannot  live,  and  not  fin.  O  ye  an- 
 "  gels,  do  ye  glorify  him  inceffantly  ;  and  if  pofTible,  pro- 
 "  flrate  yourfelves  lower  before  the  blc lied  King  of  Heaven? 
 '''  I  long  to  bear  a  part  with  you  ;  and,  if  it  were  pcflible,  lo 
 "^  help  you.  Oh,  when  we  have  done  all  that  wc  can,  to 
 *'  all  eternity,  we  fhaii  not  be  able  to  offer  the  ten  thou- 
 ''  fandth  part  of  the  homage  that  the  glorious  God  dcferves  !" 
 
 Felt  fomething  fpiiitual,  devout,  refgned,  and  mortified  to 
 the  world,  much  of  the  day  ;  and  elpecially  towards  and  iri 
 fhe  evening.  BlelTed  be  God,  that  he  enable?  Uie  to  love  hira 
 /or  himfelf. 
 
 \V'ednefday,  February  S.  Was  in  a  comfortable  frame  of  foul^ 
 moft  of  the  day ;  though  fenlible  of^  and  reftlefs  under  Ijairi- 
 tual  barrennefs.  I  find  that  both  mind  and  body  are  quickly 
 liied  with  intcnfenefs,  and  fervour  in  the  things  of  God.  O 
 that  I  could  bp  as  inccflant  as  angds  in  devotion  and  fpiritual 
 fervour ! 
 
 Thurfday.  February  9.  Obferved  this  day  as  a  day  of  faft- 
 jiig  and  prayer,  intieatirg  of  God  to  beftow  upon  me  his 
 blciling  and  grace  ;  cijpecially  to  enable  me  to  live  a  life  of 
 morLification  to  the  world,  as  well  as  of  refignation  and  pa- 
 tience. Enjoved  fome  realizing  fenfe  of  divine  power  and 
 goodntfs  in  pr  >yer,  feveral  times ;  and  wa?  enabled  to  roll  the 
 bii:dcn  of  mylelf  and  fiends,  andofZion,  upon  the  goodnefs 
 r.nd  grace  of  God:  bu:,  in  the  general,  was  more  dry  and 
 b^.rren  than  I  hav^  ufually  been  of  late  upon  fuch  occafions. 
 
 Fjiday,  February  10.  Was  exceedingly  opprefied,  mod  of 
 t';-,c  day,  witli  fh.ame,  grief,  and  fear,  under  a  fenfe  of  my 
 pafi  folly,  as  well  as  pre  fen  t  barrennefs  and  coldncfs.     Wheu 
 
 Gpd 
 
J^i.z6.       Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  loi. 
 
 God  fets  before  mc  my  paft  mifconducl,  efpecially  any  in- 
 ftances  of  mijgulded  zeal,  it  finks  my  foul  mto  lliame  and 
 confufion,  makes  me  afraid  of  a  fliaking  leaf.     My  fear   is 
 
 fuch  as  the  prophet  Jeremy  complain^  ol",   Jer.  xx.   lo. 
 
 I  have  no  contidence  to  hold  up  my  face,  even  before  my 
 fellow- worms ;  but  only  when  my  foul  confides  in  God,  and  f 
 find  the  fweet  temper  of  Chrift,  the  fpirit  of  humility,  folemn- 
 nity,  and  mortification,    and   reiignation,    alive  in  my  foul. 
 
 But,  in  the  evening,  was  unexpeftedly  refrefhed  in  j>owr- 
 
 /np-  out  my  complaint  to  Cod-,  my  fliame  and  fear  was  turn- 
 ed into  a  fweet  compolurc  and  acquielcence  in  God. 
 
 Saturday,  February  ii.  Felt  much  as  yeftcrday  :  enjoyed 
 but  little  ienfible  communion  with  God. 
 
 Lord's  day,  February  12.  My  foul  feemed  to  confide  in 
 God,  and  to  repofe  itfelr  on  him  ;  and  had  outgoings  of  foul 
 after  God  in  prayer.  Enjoyed  fome  divine  alliltance,  in  the 
 forenoon,  in  preaching;  but  in  the  afternoon'"^  was  more  per- 
 plexed with  Ihame,  (sc  Afterwards,  found  fome  relief  in 
 prayer  ;  loved,  as  a  feeble,  affiifted,  defpiled  creature,  to  cafl 
 myfelf  on  a  God  of  infinite  grace  and  goodnefs,  hoping  for  no 
 happincfs  but  from  him. 
 
 Monday,  February  13.  Was  calm  and  fedate  in  morning- 
 devotions  ;  and  my  foul  feemed  to  rely  on  God. Rode  to 
 
 Stockbridge,  and  enjoyed  fome  com.fortable  meditations  by  the 
 way ;  had  a  more  refreihing  talle  and  relllli  of  heavenly  blell^ 
 edncfs,  than  I  have  enjoyed  for  many  months  paft.  1  have 
 many  tim°s,  of  late,  felt  as  ardent  defires  of  holinefs  as  ever; 
 but  not  fo  much  fenfe  of  the  fweetncfs  and  unfpeakablc  plea- 
 fure  of  the  enjoym.ents  and  employments  of  heaven.  My  foul 
 longed  to  leave  earth,  and  bear  a  part  with  angels  in  their 
 celefiial  employments.  My  foul  faid,  "  Lord,  it  is  good  to 
 ''  be  here ;"  and  it  appeared  to  me  better  to  die,  than  ro  lofe 
 the  relilh  of  thefe  heavenly  delights. 
 
 [A  fenfe  of  divine  things  feemed  to  continue  with  him,  in 
 a  IcfTer  degree,  through  the  next  day.  On  Wednefday  he 
 was,  by  fome  difcourfc  that  he  heard,  caft  into  a  melanchol}- 
 gloorn,  that  operated  much  in  the  fame  manner  as  his  mclan- 
 $:holy  had  formerly  done,  when  he  cam.e  firft  to  Kaunaumeek ; 
 the  effedls  of  which  feemed  to  continue  in  Ibm.e  degree  the  fix 
 following  days.] 
 
 "Wednefday,  February  22.  In  the  morning,  had  as  clcnr  a 
 fenfe  of  the  exceeding  pollution  of  Uiy  nature,  as  ever  I  rc- 
 Tiicmbcr  to  have  had  in  my  life     I  tlicn  appeared  to  myfelf 
 
 inexpreiiibly 
 
^o2  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  J.  D.  1744. 
 
 inexprefTibly  lothfome  and  defiled  ;  fins  of  childhood,  of  early- 
 youth,  and  fuch  follies  as  I  had  not  thought  of  for  years  to- 
 gether, (as  I  remember),  came  now  frefh  to  my  view,  as  if 
 committed  but  yeltcrday,  and  appeared  in  the  raoft  odious 
 colours  ;  they  appeared  more  in  number  than  the  hairs  of  my 
 head ;  yea,  they  "  went  over  my  head  as  an  heavy  burden." 
 
 In  the  evening,  the  hand  of  faith  feemed  to  be  ftrength- 
 
 cned  in  God ;  my  foul  feemed  to  reft  and  acquiefce  in  him ; 
 was  fupported  under  my  burdens,  reading  the  cxxvth  pfalm ; 
 found  that  it  was  Iweet  and  comtortable  to  lean  on  God. 
 
 Thurfday,  February  23.  Was  frequent  in  prayer,  and  en- 
 joyed fome  afiiftancc. "  There  is  a  God  in  heaven,"  that 
 
 over-rules  all  things  for  the  beft ;  and  this  is  the  ccmfort  of 
 my  foul :  "  I  had  fainted,  unlefs  I  had  believed  to  fee  the  good- 
 ■*'  nefs  of  God  in  the  land  of  the  living,"  notwithftanding  prc- 
 
 fent   forrows. In  the  evening,  enjoyed  fome  freedom  in 
 
 prayer,  for  my  fell,  friends,  and  the  church  of  God. 
 
 Friday,  February  24.  Was  exceeding  reftlefs  and  perplexed 
 under  a  fenfe  of  the  mifimprovement  of  time  ;  mourned  to  fee 
 time  pafs  av/ay;  felt  in  the  greatell  hurry;  feemed  to  have 
 every  thing  to  do:  yet  could  do  nothing,  but  only  grieve  and 
 grone  under  my  ignorance,  unprofitabienefs,  meannefs,  the 
 tooiifhnefs  of  mj'  atStions  and  thoughts,  the  pride  and  bitter- 
 jiefs  of  my  paft  frames,  (at  fome  times,  at  leaft),  all  which  at 
 this  time  appeared  to  me  in  lively  colours,  and  filled  me  with 
 fharae.  I  could  not  compofe  my  mind  to  any  profitable  ftu- 
 dies,  by  reafon  of  this  preffure.  And  the  reafon,  I  judge, 
 tvhy  I  am  not  allowed  to  ftudy  a  great  part  of  my  time,  is, 
 becaufe  I  am  endeavouring  to  lay  in   fuch  a  ftoclj  of  know- 
 
 legde,  as  fhall  be  a  felf-fufficiency. 1  know  it  to  be  my 
 
 indifpcnfable  duty  to  ftudy,  and  qualify  myfelf  in  the  beft 
 manner  I  can  for  public  fervice :  but  this  is  my  mifery,  I  na- 
 turally fludy  and  prepare,  that  I  may  "  confume  it  upon  my 
 '''  lufts"  of  pride  and  felf-confidence. 
 
 [He  continued  in  much  the  fame  frame  of  uneafinefs  at  the 
 iiiifimprovement  of  time,  and  preffure  of  fpirit  under  a  fenie 
 ofvilenels,  unpr.  fitablenefs,  dr.  for  the  fix  next  following 
 days;  excepting  fome  intervals  of  calmnefs  and  compofure,  in 
 refignation  to,  and  confidence  in  God.] 
 
 Friday,  Msrch  2.  Was  moll  of  the  cay  employed  in  wri- 
 ting on  a  divine  fubjcft.  Was  frequent  in  prayer,  and  enjoy- 
 ed foine  fniall  degree  of  ajTifiance.  But  in  the  evening,  God 
 •yas  pleafed  to  grant  me  a  divine  fvvcetiicfs  in  prayer;  eht- 
 
 cially 
 
Mt.  26.        Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.         lo^ 
 
 cially  in  the  duty  of  interceffion.  I  think,  I  never  felt  {o 
 much  kindnefs  and  love  to  thofe  who  I  have  reafon  to  think 
 are  my  enemies,  (though  at  that  time  I  found  fuch  a  difpofi- 
 tion  to  think  the  bcft  of  all,  that  I  fcarce  knew  how  to  think 
 that  any  fuch  thing  as  enmity  and  hatred  lodged  in  any  foul  j 
 it  feemed  as  if  all  the  world  mnfi:  needs. be  friends) ;  and  never 
 prayed  with  more  freedom  and  delight,  for  myfelf,  or  dearefl' 
 friend,  than  I  did  now  for  my  enemies. 
 
 Saturday,  March  3.  In  the  morning,  fpent  (I  believe)  an 
 hour  in  prayer,  with  great  intenfenefs  and  freedom,  and 
 with  the  moft  foft  and  tender  affeflion  towards  mankind.  I 
 longed  that  thofe  who  I  have  reafon  to  think  owe  me  ill-will, 
 might  be  eternally  happy :  it  feemed  refrelhing,  to  think  of 
 meeting  them  in  heaven,  how  much  foever  they  had  injured 
 me  on  earth :  had  no  difpofition  to  infill  upon  any  confellion 
 from  them,  in  order  to  reconciliation,  and  the  exercife  of 
 love  and  kindnefs  to  them.  O  it  is  an  emblem  of  heaven  it- 
 fclf,  to  love  all  the  world  with  a  love  of  kindnefs,  forgivenefs, 
 and  benevolence ;  to  feel  our  fouls  fedate,  mild,  and  meek ; 
 to  be  void  of  all  evil  furmifings  and  fufpicions,  and  fcarce  abieto 
 think  evil  of  any  man  upon  any  occafion ;  to  find  our  hearts 
 fimplc,  open,  and  free,  to  thofe  that  look  upon  us  with  a  dif- 
 ferent eye  ! Prayer  was  fo  fweet  an  exercife  to  me,  that 
 
 I  knew  not  how  to  ceafe,  left  I  fhould  lofe  the  fpirit  of  prayer. 
 Felt  no  difpofition  to  eat  or  drink,  for  the  fake  of  the  plea- 
 fure  of  it,  but  only  to  fupport  my  nature,  and  fit  me  for 
 divine  fervice.  Could  not  be  content  without  a  very  particu- 
 lar mention  of  a  great  number  of  dear  friends  at  the  throne  of 
 grace  ;  as  alfo  the  particular  circumftances  of  many,  fo  far  as 
 they  were  known. 
 
 Lord's  day,  November  4.  In  the  morning,  enjoyed  the 
 fame  intenfenefs  in  prayer  as  yefterday  'morning,  though  not 
 in  fo  great  a  degree  :  felt  the  fame  fpirit  of  love,  univerfal  be- 
 nevolence, forgivenefs,  humility,  refignation,  mortification 
 to  the  world,  and  compofure  of  mind,  as  then.  "  My  foul 
 "  refted  in  God;"  and  I  found,  I  wanted  no  other  refuge  or 
 friend.  While  my  foul  thus  trufts  in  God,  all  things  feem  to 
 be  at  peace  with  me,  even  the  ftones  of  the  earth  :  but  when 
 I  cannot  apprehend  and  confide  in  God,  all  things  appear  v/ith 
 a  different  afpe^l. 
 
 [Through  the  four  next  days,  he  complains  of  barrennefs, 
 want  of  holy  confidence  in  God,  ftupidity,  v.'anderings  of 
 mind,  6c.  and  fpeaks  of  opprefTion  of  mind  under  a  lenfe  of 
 exceeding  mcannefs,  paft  fellies,  as  well  as  prefent  wcrkmgs 
 
 of 
 
104  THE     LIFE     OF         A.  D.  1744-, 
 
 •f  corrHption. On  Friday,  he  feems  to  have  been  reflcred 
 
 to  a  conlidcrablc  degree  of  the  fame  excellent  frame  that  he 
 enjoyed  the  Saturday  before.] 
 
 Saturday,  March  10.  In  the  morning,  felt  exceeding 
 dead  to  the  world,  and  all  its  enjoyments :  I  thought,  I  was 
 ready  and  willing  to  give  up  life  and  all  its  comfoits,  as  foon 
 as  called  to  it  ;  and  yet  then  had  as  much  comfort  of  life  as 
 almofl:  ever  I  had.  Life  itielf  now  appeared  but  an  empty 
 bubble;  the  riches,  honours,  and  common  enjoyments  of 
 life  appeared  extremely  taftelefs.  I  longed  to  be  perpetually 
 and  entirely  cruc^fcd  to  all  things  here  below,  by  the  crofs 
 if  Chr'jl.  My  foul  was  fwcetiy  rel:gned  to  God's  difpofai  of 
 me,  in  every  regard ;  and  1  faw,  there  had  nothing  happened 
 to  me  but  what  was  bell:  for  me.  I  confided  in  God,  that  he 
 ■would  "never  leave  me,'  though  I  fliouid  "  walk  through  the 
 *"'  valley  of  the  fhadow  of  death."  It  was  then  "  my  meat 
 *'  and  drink  to  be  holy,  to  live  to  the  Lord,  and  die  to 
 "  the  Lord."  And  I  thought,  that  I  then  enjoyed  fuch  a 
 heaven,  as  far  exceeded  the  mod  iublime  conceptions  of  an 
 unregenerate  foul;  and  even  unfpeak ably  beyond  what  I  my- 
 ielf  could  conceive  of  at  another  time.  I  did  not  wonder, 
 that  Peter  faid,  "  Lord,  it  is  good  to  be  here,"  when  thus  rc- 
 freHisd  with  divine  glories.  My  foul  was  full  of  love  and 
 tendernefs  in  the  duty  of  interceffion ;  efpecially  felt  a  mcfl: 
 fwcet  affeclion  to  fome  precious  godly  minifters,  of  my 
 -acquaintance.  Prayed  earneilly  for  dear  Chriftians,  and  for 
 thofe  I  have  reafon  to  fear  are  my  enemies ;  and  could  net 
 have  fpoken  a  word  of  bitternefs,  or  entertained  a  bitter 
 thought,  againft  the  vilefl  man  living.  Had  a  fenfe  of  ray 
 »wn  great  unworthinefs.  My  foul  Teemed  to  breathe  forth 
 love  and  praife  to  God  afrefh,  when  I  thought  he  would  let 
 his  children  love  and  receive  me  as  one  of  their  brethren  and 
 fcliow-citizens :  and  when  I  thought  of  their  treating  me  in 
 that  manner,  I  longed  to  lie  at  their  ^ttl ;  and  could  think  of 
 no  way  to  exprcfs  the  fmcerity^  and  llmplicity  of  my  love 
 and  efleem  of  them,  as  being  much  better  than  myfelf. — To- 
 M'ards  night,  was  very  forrowful  ;  feemed  to  myfelf  the 
 worfl:  creature  living ;  and  could  not  pra}',  nor  meditate,  nor 
 think  of  holding  up  my  face  before  the  world, — Was  a  little 
 rtileved  in  prayer,  in  the  evening  ;  but  longed  to  get  on  my 
 knees,  and  ailc  forgivenefs  of  every  body  that  ever  had  itts\ 
 any  thing  amifs  in  ray  pafl:  conduft,  efpecially  in  my  reli- 
 gious zeal. — Was  aftcrv.'ards  much  perplexed,  lb  that  I  cculd 
 not  lleep  quietly. 
 
 Lord's 
 
JEt.26.      Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  105 
 
 .  Lord's  day,  March  11.  My  foul  was  in  fomc  rrerxfurc 
 f}ren(rthened  in  God,  in  morning-devotion  ;  lo  that  I  was  re- 
 leafed  from  trembling  fear  and  diftrefs. Preached  to  my 
 
 people  from  the  parable  of  they&u-f-r,  Ma:tli.  xiii.  and  enjoy- 
 ed fome  alBilance,  both  parts  of  the  day  :  had  feme  freedom, 
 affedion,  and  Fervency  in  addrefling  ray  poor  per.pk ;  longed 
 that  God  JhoulJ  tike  hold  of  their  heai  ts,  and  make  thera 
 fpiritually  alive.  And  indeed  I  had  ^o  much  to  fay  to  them, 
 that  I  knew  not  how  to  leave  off  fpeaking  ^. 
 
 Monday,  March  12.  In  the  morning,  was  in  a  devout,  ten- 
 der, and  loving  frame  of  mind  ;  and  was  enabled  to  cry  to 
 God,  I  hope,  with  a  child-like  fpirit,  with  importunity,  and 
 I'efignation,  and  compofure  of  mind.  My  fpirit  was  full  of 
 quictnefs,  and  love  to  mankind ;  and  longed  that  peace  fhould 
 reign  on  the  car;h :  was  grieved  at  the  very  thoughts  of  a 
 fiery,  angry,  and  intemperate  zeal  in  religion  ;  mourned 
 over  paft  follies  ia  that  regard ;  and  mj'  foul  confided  in  God 
 fbr  Ifrength  and  grace  farficient  for  my  fuoire  work  and 
 trials. — Spent  the  day  mainly  in  hard  labour,  making  prepa- 
 ration for  my  intended  journey. 
 
 Tuefday,  March  13.  Felt  my  foul  going  forth  after  God 
 fometimes ;  but  not  with  fuch  ardency  as  T  longed  for.  In 
 the  evening,  was  enabled  to  continue  ir.fiant  in  prayer.,  for 
 Tome  confiderable  time  together  ;  and  elpecially  had  refpeft 
 to  the  journ?y  I  defigned  to  enter  upon,  with  the  leave  of  di- 
 vine providence,  en  the  morrow.  Enjoyed  fome  freedom 
 and  fervency,  intreating  that  the  divine  prefence  might  attend 
 me  in  e-.-ery  place  v. here  my  bufmefs  might  lead  me;  and  had 
 a  particular  reference  to  the  trials  and  temptations  that  I  ap- 
 prehended I  niight  be  mDre  eminently  expcfed  to  in  particular 
 places.  Was  fhengthened  and  comforted ;  although  I  was  be- 
 fore very  wear}'.  Trulv  the  y^y  of  the  Lord  is  Jrrenpth  and 
 Ife.         -  ' 
 
 \^  ednefday,  March  14.  Enjoyed  fome  intenfenefs  of  foul 
 ki  prayer,  repeating  my  petitions  for  God's  prefence  in  every 
 place  where  I  expected  to  be  in  my  j Durnej'.  Befought  the 
 Lord  that  I  migh:  not  be  too  much  pleafed  and  amvfed  with 
 dear  friends  and  acquaintance,  in  one  place  znd  another. 
 
 *  This  was  the  Kifl  Sabbath  that  ever  be  performed  p-jblic  f-rvice 
 at  Kaunaumesk,  and  thefe  the  laft  fermons  that  ever  iie  preached 
 Acre.  It  appears  by  his  diary,  that  while  he  continued  with 
 thefe  Indians,  he  took  great  pains  with  them,  and  did  it  with  much 
 difcretion  :  but  the  particular  manner  how,  has  been  omitted  for 
 brevity's  fake. 
 
 O  Near 
 
■io6  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  AD.  174^; 
 
 Near  ten  Cet  out  on   my  journey,  and  near  night  came  to 
 Stockbridge. 
 
 Thurfday,  March  15.  Rode  down  to  Sheffield.  Here  I  met 
 a  meflenger  iVom  Eaft- Hampton  on  Long-Ifland  ;  who  by  tke 
 unanimous  vote  of  that  large  town,  was  fent  to  invite  me 
 thither,  in  order  to  fettle  with  that  people,  where  I  had  been 
 before  frequently  invited.  Seemed  more  at  a  lofs  what  was 
 my  duty,  than  before  ;  when  I  heard  of  the  great  difficulties 
 of  that  place,  I  was  much  concerned  and  grieved,  and  telt 
 .  fome  defires  to  comply  with  their  requcll ;  but  knew  not 
 "\^hat  to  do  :  endeavoured  to  commit  the  cafe  to  God. 
 
 {[The  two  n'^xt  days,  he  went  no  further  than  Salilbury, 
 being  much  hindered  by  the  rain.  When  he  came  there,  he 
 was  much  indifpofed. — He  fpeaks  of  comfortable  and  prufit- 
 able  converfation  with  Chiiftian  friends,  on  thel'e  days.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  March  18.  [At  Salifbury]  was  exceeding 
 %veak  and  faint,  fo  that  I  could  fcarce  walk  :  but  God  was 
 pleafed  to  aliord  me  much  freedom,  clearneA;,  and  fervency 
 in  preaching:  I  have  not  had  the  like  affiftance  in  preaching 
 
 to  fmncrs  for  many  months  part. Here  another  rnefienger 
 
 met  me,  and  informed  me  of  the  vote  of  another  congregation, 
 to  give  me  an  invitation  to  come  among  them  upon  probation 
 for  fettlement  *.  Was  fomething  exercifed  in  mind  with  a 
 weight  and  burden  of  care.  Q  that  God  would  "  fend  forth 
 "  faithful  labourers  into  his  harveft!" 
 
 [After  this,  he  went  forward  on  his  journey  towards  New- 
 York  and  New-Jerfej'^ :  in  which  he  proceeded  llowly ;  per- 
 forming his  journey  under  great  dtgrees  of  bodily  indifpo- 
 iition.  However,  he  preached  feveral  times  by  the  way,  being 
 Lijged  by  friends ;  in  which  he  had  confidcrable  affiftance. 
 lie  fpeaks  of  comfort  in  converfation  with  Chriftian  friends, 
 from  time  to  time,  and  of  various  things  in  the  excrcifes  and 
 frames  of  his  heart,  that  ihe<v  much  oi  a  divine  influence  on 
 his  mind  in  this  journey  ;  but  j-et  complains  of  the  thing  that 
 he  feared,  viz.  a  decline  of  his  Ipiritual  life,  or  vivacity  in  re- 
 ligion, by  m.eans  of  his  conftant  removal  from  place  to  place, 
 and  want  of  retirement ;  and  complains  bitterly   of  his  un- 
 
 Vv'orthinefs,  dcadnefs,  Cc. He    came   to    New-York   on 
 
 Wednefday,     March   28.     and  to    Elifabeth-Town    on   the 
 
 *  This  congregation  was  that  at  TVliliinfjton,  near  Haddam. 
 They  were  very  earneflly  defirous  ef  his  coming  among  them. 
 
 Saturday 
 
J^t.iC.     Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  107 
 
 Saturday  following,  where  it  feems  he  waited  till  the  com* 
 iniilioners  came  t.gciher.] 
 
 Thurfday,  April  5.  Was  again  much  exercifed  with  weak- 
 nefi>,  and  with  pain  in  my  head.  Attended  on  the  commif- 
 lioners  in  tneir  meeting  *.  Rcfijived  tu  go  on  fliil  with  the 
 Indian  aif  lir,  if  divine  providence  permitted  ;  although  I  had 
 before  feit  fome  inclination  to  go  to  £aft-Hampton,  where  | 
 was  foliciced  to  go  f . 
 
 •  The  Indians  at  Kaunaumeek  being  but  few  in  number,  and  Mr 
 Brainerd  having  now  been  labouring  among  them  about  a  year,  and 
 having  prevailed  upon  them  to  be  willing  to  leave  Kaunaumeek,  and 
 renove  to  Stockbndge,  to  live  conftantly  under  Mr  Sergeant's  mi? 
 nidry  ;  he  thought  he  might  now  do  more  fervice  for  Ghrill  among 
 the  Indians  clfewhere  :  and  therefore  went  this  journey  to  New- 
 Jerfey  to  lay  the  matter  before  the  comniilioners ;  who  met  at  Eli- 
 fahnh-  Town,  on  this  occaiion,  and  determined  that  he  (hould  forth- 
 with leave  Kaunaumeek,  and  go  to  the  Delaware  Indians. 
 
 f  By  the  invitations  Mr  Brainerd  had  lately  received,  it  appears, 
 that  it  was  not  from  neceffity,  or  for  want  of  opportunities  to  fettle 
 in  the  miniftry  araongft  the  Englifh,  notwithftanding  the  difgrace  he 
 bad  been  laid  under  at  college,  that  he  was  determined  to  forfake 
 all  the  outward  comforts  to  be  enjoyed  in  the  Englifli  fetilements, 
 to  go  and  fpend  his  life  among  the  hvm\{[\  favages,  and  endure  the 
 difficulties  and  fclfdenials  of  an  Indian  mifion.  He  had,  juft  as  he 
 was  leaving  Kaunaumeek,  had  an  e*rne(t  invitation  to  a  lettlement 
 at  Fall- Hampton  on  Long  Ifland,  the  faireft,  pieafanttft  town  on 
 the  whole  ifland,  and  one  of  its  largeft  and  mo(l;  wealthy  pawihes. 
 The  people  there  were  unanimous  in  their  defires  to  have  hmi  for 
 their  palior,  and  for  a  long  time  continued  in  an  earneft  purfuit  of 
 what  they  defired,  and  were  hardly  brought  to  relinquiHi  iheir  en- 
 deavours and  give  up  their  hopes  of  obtaining  him.  Belides  the  in- 
 vitation he  had  to  Millington;  which  was  near  his  native  town,  and 
 in  the  midft  of  his  friends.  Nor  did  Mr'Brainerd  chufe  the  bufinefs 
 of  a  miffionary  to  the  Indians,  rather  than  accept  of  thofe  invita- 
 tions, becaufe  he  was  unacquainted  with  the  difF.cuities  and  fufFerings 
 which  attended  fuch  a  fervice:  for  he  had  had  experience  of  thele 
 difficulties  in  fummer  and  winter ;  having  fpent  about  a  tweivemontli 
 in  a  lonely  deftrt  among  thefe  favages,  where  he  had  gone  through 
 extreme  hardfliips,  and  been  the  fubjedl  of  a  train  of  outward  and 
 inward  forrcws,  which  were  now  frefh  in  his  mind.  Nctwithfland- 
 ing  all  thefe  things,  he  chofe  ftill  to  go  on  with  this  buGnefs ;  and 
 that  although  the  place  he  was  now  going  to,  was  at  a  ftill  much 
 greater  diftance  from  moll  of  his  friends,  acquaintance,  and  native 
 land. 
 
 O  1  [After 
 
io8  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  A.D.  1744. 
 
 [After  this,  he  continued  two  or  three  days  in  the  Jer- 
 feys,  very  ill;  and  then  returned  to  New- York;  and  from 
 thence  into   New-England;  and  went  to  his  native  town  of 
 
 Haddam  ;  where  he  arrived  on  Saturday,  x'\pril  14. And 
 
 he  continues  ftill  his  bitter  complaint.-?  of  want  of  retirement. 
 While  he  was  in  New- York,  iie  fays  thus,  "  Oh,  it  is  not  the 
 ^*  plcafures  of  the  lyorW  can  comfort  me  !  If  6'^^  deny  his 
 "  prcfence,  what  are  the  pleafures  of  the  city  to  me  ?  One 
 "  hour  of  fweet  retirement  where  God  is,  is  better  than  the 
 *'  whole  world."  And  he  continues  to  ery  out  of  his  ignorance, 
 rieannefs,  and  unworthinef:.   However,  he  Ipeaks  of  fome  fea- 
 
 fons  of  fpecial  aiLilancc,  and  divine  fweetnef? He  fpent  fome 
 
 days  among  his  friends  at  Eafl-Hampton  and  Miilington.] 
 
 Tuefday,  April  17.  Rode  to  Miilington  again;  and  felt 
 perplexed  when  I  fct  out ;  was  feeble  in  body,  and  weak  in 
 faith.  I  was  going  to  preach  a  lecture  :  and  feared  1  fhould 
 never  have  alTiftance  tmough  to  get  through.  But  contriving 
 to  ride  alone, 'at  a  dluance  from  the  company  that  was  going, 
 I  fpent  the  time  in  lifting  up  my  heart  to  God  ;  had  not  gone 
 far  before  my  foul  was  abundantly  flrengthened  with  thofe 
 words,  ''  If  God  be  for  us,  who  can  be  againfl  us?"  I  went 
 on,  confiding  in  God ;  and  fearing  nothing  fo  mich  as  felf- 
 confidence.  In  this  frame  I  went  to  the  houle  of  God,  and 
 enjoyed  fome  alTiftancc.  Afterwards  felt  the  fpirit  of  love 
 and  meeknefs  in  converfation  with  fom.e  fiiends.  Then  rode 
 home  to  my  brother's :  and  in  the  evening,  fmging  hymns 
 \nlS  friends,  my  foul  feemed  to  melt:  and  in  prayer  after- 
 wards, enjoyed  the  exercife  of  faith,  and  was  enabled  to  be 
 fervent  in  fpirit :  found  miore  of  God's  prefence,  than  I  have 
 done  any  time  in  my  late  weari fome  journey.  Eternity  ap- 
 peared very  near ;  my  nature  was  very  weak,  and  feemed 
 ready  to  be  diflblved;  the  fun  declining,  and  the  fhadcws  of 
 the  evening  dra\i  ing  en  apace.  O  I  lunged  to  fill  up  the  re- 
 maining moments  all  for  God !  Though  my  body  was  fo 
 feeble,  and  wearied  with  preaching,  and  much  private  conver- 
 fation, yet  I  wanted  to  ft  up  all  night  to  do  fometbing  for 
 God.  To  God,  the  giver  of  ihefe  relref.iments,  be  glory  for 
 ever  and  ever.     Amen. 
 
 Wednefday,  April  18.  Was  very  weak,  and  enjoyed  but 
 little  fpiritual  comfort.  \V  as  exercifed  w  ith  one  cavilling  againft 
 original  fn.  May  the  Lord  open  his  eyes  to  fee  the  tountaiii 
 ur  uii  in  himfelfi 
 
 [After  ihls,  he  vifited  feverd  miuflers  In  Connedlicut;  and 
 
 then 
 
^M7-        Mr    DAVID     BR  A  IN  ERD.  lo^ 
 
 then  travelled  towards  Kaunaumeek,  and  came  to  Mr  Ser- 
 geant's at  Stockbridge,  Thurfday,  April  26.  He  performed 
 this  journey  in  a  very  weak  ftate  of  body.  The  things  he 
 fpeaks  of  in  the  mean  time,  appertaining  to  the  frames  and 
 cxercifes  of  his  mind,  are  at  fome  times  deadnefs  and  a  being 
 void  of  fpiritual  comfort,  at  other  times  refting  in  God,  fpi- 
 ritual  fweetnefs  in  converfation,  engagednefs  in  meditation 
 on  the  road,  afliftance  in  preaching,  rejoicing  to  think  that 
 fo  much  more  of  his  work  was  done,  and  he  fo  much  nearer 
 to  the  eternal  world.  And  he  once  and  again  fpeaks  of  a  fenf© 
 of  great  ignorance,  fpiritual  pollution,  6c.] 
 
 Friday  and  Saturday,  April  27.  and  28.  Spent  fome  time 
 in  vifiting  friends,  and  difcourling  with  my  people,  (who 
 were  now  moved  down  from  their  own  place  to  Mr  Sergeant's), 
 and  found  them  very  glad  to  fee  me  returned.  Was  exercifed 
 in  my  mind  v/ith  a  fenfe  of  my  own  unworthinefs. 
 
 Lord's  day,  April  29.  Preached  for  Mr  Sergeant,  both 
 parts  of  the  day,  from  Rev.  xiv.  4.  Enjoyed  fome  freedom 
 in  preaching,  though  not  much  fpirituality.  In  the  evening, 
 my  heart  was  in  fome  meafure  lifted  up  in  thankfulnefs  to  God 
 for  any  afiiflance. 
 
 Monday,  April  30.  Rode  to  Kaunaumeek,  but  was  ex- 
 tremely ill;  did  not  enjoy  the  comfort  I  hoped  for  in  my  ov/n 
 houfe. 
 
 Tuefday,  May  i.  Having  received  new  orders  to  go  to  a 
 Mumber  of  Indians  on  Delaware  river  in  Penfylvania,  and  my 
 people  here  being  moftly  removed  to  Mr  Sergeant's,  I  this 
 day  took  all  my  clothes,  books,  dc  anddifpofedof  them,  and 
 fet  out  for  Delaware  river :  but  made  it  my  way  to  return  to 
 Mr  Sergeant's  ;  which  I  did  this  day,  juft  at  night.  Rode 
 feveral  hours  in  the  rain  through  the  howling  wildernefs,  al- 
 though I  was  fo  difordered  in  body,  that  little  or  nothing  but 
 blood  came  from  me. 
 
 [He  continued  at  Stockbridge  the  next  day;  and  on  Thurf- 
 day  rode  a  little  way,  to  Sheffield,  under  a  great  degree  of  ill- 
 nels;  but  with  encouragement  and  chearfulnefs  of  mind  un- 
 ^er  his  fatigues.  On  Friday,  he  rode  to  Salilbury,  and  con- 
 tinued there  till  after  the  Sabbath.  He  fpeaks  of  his  foul's 
 being,  fome  part  of  this  time,  refrefhed  in  couverfation  with 
 fome  Chriftian  friends,  about  their  heavenly  home  and  their 
 journey  thither.  At  other  times,  he  fpeaks  of  himfclf  as  ex- 
 ceedingly perplexed  with  barrcnnefs  and  deadnefs,  and  has 
 this  cxclamaticn,  "  Oh^  that  tirne  fheuld  pafs  with  fo  little 
 
 "  danc 
 
110  T  H  E    L  I  F  E    O  r  A.  D.  1744. 
 
 "  done  for  God!" On   Monday  he  rode  to  Sharon;  and 
 
 fpeaks  of  himfcif  as  diftrefled  at  the  confidcration  of  the  mif» 
 improvement  of  time.] 
 
 Tuefday,  May  8.  Set  out  from  Sharon  in  Conneflicut,  an4 
 travelled  about  forty-five  miles  to  a  place  called  the  Fijlo-kit  *, 
 and  lodged  there.  Spent  much  of  my  time,  while  nding,  in 
 prayer,  that  God  would  go  with  me  to  Delaware.  My  heart 
 fometimes  was  ready  to  fink  with  the  thoughts  of  my  wuik, 
 and  going  alone  in  the  wildernefs,  I  knew  not  where:  but 
 Hill  it  was  comfortable,  to  think,  that  others  of  God's  chil- 
 dren had  "  wandered  about  in  caves  and  dens  of  the  earth ;" 
 and  Abraham,  when  he  was  called  to  go  forth,  "  went  out, 
 *'  not  knowing  whither  he  went."  O  that  I  might  follow  af 
 ter  God  ! 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  went  forward  on  his  journey ;  crofled 
 Hudfon's  river,  and  went  to  Gofhen  in  the  Highlands ;  and  fo 
 travelled  acrofs  the  woods,  from  Hudfon's  river  to  Delaware, 
 about  an  hundred  miles,  through  a  defolate  and  hideous  coun- 
 try, above  New-Jcrfey;  where  were  very  few  fettlements :  in 
 which  journey  he  fuffered  much  fatigue  and  hardlhip.  He 
 vilited  fome  Indians  in  the  way  f ,  and  difcourfed  with  them 
 concerning  Chriftianity.  Was  confiderably  melancholy  and 
 difconfolate,  being  alone  in  a  ftrange  wildernefs.  On  Saturday, 
 he  came  to  a  fettlement  of  Irifh  and  Dutch  people,  about 
 twelve  miles  above  the  Forks  of  Delaware.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  May  13.  Rofe  early;  felt  very  poorly  after  my 
 long  journey,  and  after  being  wet  and  fatigued.  Was  very 
 melancholy ;  have  fcarce  ever  (een  fuch  a  gloomy  morning  in 
 my  life  ;  there  appeared  to  be  no  S<,bbath',  the  children  were 
 all  at  play ;  I  a  itranger  in  the  wildernefs,  and  knew  not  where 
 to  go ;  and  all  circuraflances  feemed  to  confpire  to  render  my 
 affairs  dark  and  difcouraging.  Was  difappointed  refpeffing 
 an  interpreter,  and  heard  that  the  Indians  were  much  fcatteri. 
 ed,  6c.  Oh,  I  mourned  after  the  prelence  of  God,  and  feem- 
 ed like  a  creature  banifhed  from  his  fight !  yet  he  was  pleafed 
 to  fupport  my  finking  foul,  amidfl:  all  my  forrows ;  fo  that  I 
 never  entertained  any  thought  of  quitting  my  bufmefs  among 
 
 *  A  place  fo  called  in  New- York  government,  near  Hudfon's  ri- 
 ■»cr,  on  the  weft  fide  of  the  river. 
 
 f  See  Mr  Brainerd's  Narrathe,  in  a  letter  to  Mr  Pcrabcrton,  2t 
 the  end  of  his  ordinati«n-fcrmon,---pnge  32,  35. 
 
 the' 
 
m.11'      Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  iii 
 
 the  poor  Indians ;    but  was  comforted,  to  think,  that  death 
 
 would  ere  long  fct  me  free  from  thefe  diftrefles. Rode  a* 
 
 bout  three  or  four  miles  to  the  Iri{h  people,  where  I  found 
 fome  that  appeared  fobcr  and  concerned  about  religion.  My 
 heart  then  began  to  be  a  little  encouraged :  went  and  preached, 
 firft  to  the  Iriih,  and  then  to  the  Indians :  and  in  the  evening, 
 was  a  little  comforted;  my  foul  feemed  to  reft  on  God,  and 
 take  courage.  O  that  the  Lord  would  be  my  fupport  and 
 Comforter  in  an  evil  world  ! 
 
 Monday,  May  14.  Was  vei"y  bufy  in  fome  necefTary  ftu- 
 dies.  Felt  myfelf  very  loofe  from  all  the  world ;  all  appeared 
 "  vanity  and  vexation  of  fpirit."  Seemed  fomething  loncfome 
 and  difconfolate,  as  if  I  was  baniftied  from  all  mankind,  and 
 bereaved  of  all  that  is  called  pleafurable  in  the  world  ;  but  ap- 
 peared to  mylelf  io  vile  and  unworthy,  it  feemed  fitter  for  me 
 to  be  here  than  any  where. 
 
 Tuefday,  May  15.  Still  much  engaged  in  my  ftudies;  and 
 enjoyed  more  health,  than  I  have  for  fome  time  part :  but  was 
 fonething  dejcfted  in  fpirit  with  a  fenfe  of  my  meannefs ; 
 feemed  as  if  I  could  never  do  any  thing  at  all  to  any  good 
 purpofe  by  reafon  of  ignorance  and  folly.  O  that  a  fenfe  of 
 thefc  things  might  work  more  habitual  humility  in  my  foul  I 
 
 [He  continued  much  in  the  fame  frame  the  next  day.] 
 
 Thurfday,  May  17.  Was  this  day  greatly  diftrefled  with  a 
 fenfe  of  my  vilenefs;  appeared  to  myfelf  too  bad  to  walk  on 
 God's  earth,  or  to  be  treated  with  kindnefs  by  any  of  his 
 creatures.  God  was  pleafed  to  let  me  fee  my  inward  pollu- 
 tion and  corruption,  to  fuch  a  degree,  that  I  almoft  defpaired 
 of  being  made  holy :  "  Oh!  wretched  man  that  I  am!  who 
 *'  fhall  deliver  me  from  the  body  of  this  death?"  In  the  af- 
 ternoon, met  with  the  Indians,  according  to  appointment, 
 and  preached  to  them.  Kwd^  while  riding  to  them,  my  foul 
 feemed  to  conlide  in  God ;  and  afterwards  had  fome  relief 
 and  enlargement  of  foul  in  prayer,  and  fome  afTiftance  in  the 
 duty  of  interccfiijn :  vital  piety  and  holinefs  appeared  fweet 
 to  me,  and  1  longed  for  the  perfeclion  of  it, 
 
 Friday,  May  18.  Felt  again  fomething  of  the  fweet  fpirit 
 of  religion;  and  my  foul  feemed  to  confide  in  God,  that  he 
 would  never  leave  me. — But  oftentimes  faw  myfelf  fo  mean 
 a  creature,  that  I  knew  not  how  to  think  of  preaching.  O 
 that  I  could  always  live  /o,  and  Kpon  God! 
 
 Saturday,  May  19.  Was,  fome  part  of  the  time,  greatly 
 pppreiTed  with  the  weight  aiid  burden  of  my  work;  it  feemed 
 
 impoilible 
 
112  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  J.  D.  174^. 
 
 impOiTible  for  me  ever  to  go  through  with  the  bufinefs  1  had 
 undertaken. Towards  night,  was  very  calm  and  comfort- 
 able ;  and  I  think,  my  foul  trufted  in  God  for  help. 
 
 Lord's  day,  May  20.  Preached  twice  to  the  poor  Indians, 
 and  enjoyed  fome  freedom  in  fpeaking,  while  I  attempted  to 
 remove  their  prejudices  againft  Chriftianity,  My  foul  longed 
 for  aififlance  from  above,  all  the  while ;  for  I  faw  I  had  no 
 ftrength  fufficient  for  that  work.  Afterwards,  preached  to 
 the  Irilh  people ;  was  much  aJOTifled  in  the  firft  prayer,  and 
 fomething  in  icrmon.  Several  perfons  feemed  much  concern- 
 €d  for  their  fouls,  with  whom  I  difcourfed  afterwards  with 
 much  freedom  and  fome  power.  Blefled  be  God  for  any  af- 
 fiftance  afforded  to  an  unworthy  worm.  O  that  I  could  live 
 to  him .' 
 
 [Th.rough  the  reft  of  this  week,  he  was  fometimes  ready 
 to  fink  with  a  fcnfe  of  his  unworthinefs  and  unfitnefs  for  the 
 work  of  the  miniftry;  and  fometimes  encouraged  and  lifted 
 above  his  fears  and  forrows,  and  was  enabled  confidently  to 
 rely  on  God  ;  and  efpecially  on  Saturday,  towards  night, 
 he  enjoyed  calmnefs  and  compofure,  and  afliftance  in  prayer 
 to  God.  He  rejoiced,  (as  he  fays),  *'  That  God  remains 
 **  unchangeably  powerful  and  faithful,  a  furc  and  fufficient 
 *^  portion,  and  the  dwelling-place  of  his  children  in  all  genc- 
 "  rations."] 
 
 Lord's  day.  May  27.  Vifited  my  Indians,  in  the  morning, 
 and  attended  upon  a  funerrd  among  them ;  was  affefted  to  fee 
 their  Heathtnijh  praWces,  O  that  they  might  be  "turned 
 *^  from  darknefs  to  light!"  Afterwards,  got  a  confiderable 
 number  of  them  together,  and  preached  to  them;  and  obler- 
 red  them  very  attentive.  After  this,  preached  to  the  white 
 people  from  Heb.  ii.  3.  Was  enabled  to  fpeak  with  fome 
 freedom  and  power  :  feveral  people  feemed  much  concerned 
 for  their  fouls ;  efpecially  one  who  had  been  educated  a  Ro- 
 man catholic.     BlelTed  be  the  Lord  for  any  help. 
 
 Monday,  May  28.  Set  out  from  the  Indians  above  the 
 Forks  of  Delaware,  on  a  journey  towards  Newark  in  New- 
 Jerfey,  accf  rding  to  my  orders.  Rode  through  the  vs  iidcr- 
 nefs ;  v.?.s  much  fatigued  with  the  heat;  lodged  at  a  place 
 called  Black- River;  was  exceedingly  tired  and  worn  out. 
 
 \_0\\  Tu'^fday,  he  came  to  Newark.  The  next  day,  went 
 to  Eiif^b.  t!>Town  ;  on  Thurfday,  he  went  to  New- York  ; 
 and    on    Friday  returned  to   Eiilabeth-Town.     Thefe  days 
 
 were 
 
m-rr.     Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  i f 3 
 
 were  fpent  in  fome  perplexiiy  of  mind.  He  continued  at 
 Elifabtth-Town  till  Friday  in  the  wed:  following.  Was  en- 
 livened, refreflied,  and  lirengthened  on  the  Sabbath  at  the 
 Lord's  table.  The  enlbing  days  of  the  week  were  fpent 
 chiefly  in  ftudies  preparatory  lo  his  ord  nation  ;  and  on  iorac 
 of  them  he  feemed  to  have  much  of  God's  gracious  prefcnce, 
 and  oi  the  fwcet  influences  of  his  Spirit ;  but  was  in  a  very 
 weak  itate  of  body.     On  Saturday,  he  rode  to  Newark.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  June  10.  [At  Newark]  in  the  morning,  was 
 much  concerned  how  I  ihotild  perform  the  work  of  the  day  5 
 and  trembled  at  the  thoughts  of  being  left  to  mylelF.-^ Enjoy- 
 ed very  confiderabie  affiftance  in  all  parts  of  the  public  fervice. 
 Had  an  opportunity  agun  to  attend  on  the  ordinance  of  the 
 Lord's  fupper,  and  through  divine  goodnefs  was  refreihed  in 
 it:  my  foul  was  full  of  love  and  tend.ernefs  tou'ards  the  chil- 
 dren of  God,  and  towards  all  men ;  felt  a  certain  fweetnefs 
 of  difpofition  towards  every  creature.  At  night,  I  enjoyed 
 more  fpirituality,  and  fweet  delire  of  holinefs,  than  I  have 
 felt  for  fome  time :  was  afraid  of  every  thought  and  every 
 motion,  left  thereby  my  heart  fliould  be  drawn  away  from 
 God.  O  that  J  might  never  leave  the  blefled  God!  "  Lord, 
 '*  in  thy  prefence  is  fulnefs  of  joy."  O  the  blefTednefs-o!:' 
 living  to  God ! 
 
 Monday,  June  11.  This  day  the  pre/iytejy  met  together 
 at  Nevv'ark,  in  order  to  my  ordination.  War.  very  weak  and 
 difordered  in  body;  yet  endeavoured  to  rcpofe  my  confidcriCe 
 in  God.  Spent  moft  of  the  day  alone;  efpecially  the  fcre^ 
 noon.  At  three  in  the  afternoon  preached  my  probation-fer- 
 mon,  from  Afls  xxvi.  17.  18.  being  a  text  given  me  for  thct 
 end.  Felt  not  well,  either  in  body  or  mind  ;  however,  God 
 carried  me  through  comfortably.  Afterwards,  palTed  an  ex- 
 amination before  the  prejbytery.  Was  m^ch  tired,  and  my 
 mind  burdened  with  the  greatnefs  of  that  charge  I  was  in 
 the  moft  folemn  manner  ab'Ut  to  take  upon  mc :  my  mind 
 was  io  prefTed  with  the  weight  of  the  w^rk  incumbent  upon 
 me,  that  I  could  not  fleep  this  night,  though  very  weary  and 
 in  great  need  of  reft. 
 
 Tuefday,  June  12.  V/as  this  morning  further  examined, 
 refpecling  my  experimental   acquaintance  with  Chriftianity  *. 
 
 At 
 
 *  Mr  Pemberton,  in  a  letter  to  the  Honourable  fociety  in  Scot- 
 land that  employed  Mr  3rainerd,  which  he  v/rote  concerning  him, 
 
 P  (pubiifhed 
 
ii4  THELIFEOF  J.D.1744, 
 
 At  ten  o'clock  my  ordination  was  attended  ;  the  fennon  preach- 
 ed by  the  Reverend  Mr  Pemberton.  At  this  time  I  was  kf- 
 fe6ted  with  a  fn-ife  of  the  important  rruft  committed  to  me; 
 yet  was  compofed,  and  folemn,  without  diftraftion :  and  I 
 hope,  I  then  (as  many  times  before)  gave  myfelf  up  to  God, 
 to  be  for  him,  and  not  for  another.  O  that  I  might  always 
 be  engaged  in  the  fervice  of  God,  and  duly  remember  the  Ib- 
 lemn  charge  I  have  received,  in  the  pretence  of  God,  angels, 
 and  men.  Amen.  May  I  be  affiled  of  God  for  this  purpofe. — 
 Towards  night,  rode  to  Eli fabeth- Town. 
 
 (publiflied  in  Scotland  in  the  Chrijlian  monthly  hijiory),  writes 
 thus,  "  We  can  with  pleafure  fay,  that  Mr  Brainerd  pafled  through 
 "  his  ordination- trials,  to  the  univerfal  approbation  of  the  prejby- 
 "  tery,  and  appeared  uncommonly  qualified  for  the  work  of  the 
 "  miniftry  He  feems  to  be  armed  with  a  great  deal  of  felf-denial, 
 "  and  animated  with  a  noble  zeal  to  propagate  the  gofpel  among 
 *•  thofe  barbarous  nations,  who  have  long  dwelt  in  the  darknefs  of 
 •*  Keathenifm." 
 
 PART 
 
^)J(^<)K¥^)e<^^^(^^0(^)^^'^^^^^>?^^^OK 
 
 PART       VI. 
 
 From  his  Ordination,  till  he  firfl  began  to 
 preach  to  the  Indians  at  Crofweekfung,  a- 
 mong  whom  he  had  his  mofl  remarkable 
 Succefs. 
 
 WEdnefday,  June  13.  Spent  fome  confiderable  time  in 
 writing  an  account  of  the  Indian  affairs  to  go  to 
 Scotland ;  fpent  fome  time  in  converfation  with  friends ;  but 
 enjoyed  not  much  fweetnefs  and  fatisfaftion. 
 
 Thurfday,  June  14.  Received  fome  particular  kindnefs 
 from  friends ;  and  wondered,  that  God  fliould  open  the  hearts 
 of  any  to  treat  me  with  kindnefs :  faw  myfelf  to  be  unworthy 
 of  any  favour,  from  God,  or  any  of  my  fellow-men.  Was; 
 much  exercifed  with  pain  in  my  head;  however  determined, 
 to  fet  out  on  my  journey  towards  Delaware  in  the  afternoon  : 
 but  in  the  afternoon  my  pain  increafed  exceedingly ;  fo  that 
 I  was  obliged  to  betake  myfelf  to  the  bed  ;  and  the  night  fol-' 
 lowing,  was  greatly  diftreffed  with  pain  and  ficknefs  ;  was 
 fometimes  almoft  bereaved  of  the  exercife  of  reafon  by  the 
 extremity  of  pain.  Continued  much  difireffed  till  Saturday, 
 when  I  was  fomething  relieved  by  an  emetic  :  but  was  unable 
 to  walk  abroad  till  the  Monday  following,  in  the  afternoon  ; 
 and  ftill  remained  very  feeble.  I  often  admired  the  goodnefs 
 of  God,  that  he  did  not  fuffer  me  to  proceed  on  my  journey 
 from  this  place  where  I  was  fo  tenderly  ufed,  and  to  be  ficlc 
 by  the  way  among  flrangers. — God  is  very  gracious  to  me, 
 both  in  health  and  ficknefs,  and  intermingles  much  mercy 
 with  all  m.y  afSiflions  and  toils.  Enjoyed  fome  fweetnefs  in 
 things  divine,  in  the  midfl  of  my  pain  and  weaknefs.  Ok 
 that  I  could  praife  the  Lord  ! 
 
 [On  Tuefday,  June  19.    He  fet  out  on  his  journey  home, 
 and  in  three  days  reached  his  place,  near  the  Forks  of  Dela- 
 
 P  2  ware. 
 
Ii6  T  H  E     L  I  r  E     O  F         J.  D.  1744, 
 
 v/arc.  PcrforiricJ  the  journey  under  much  weaknels  of 
 body  ;  but  had  comfort  in  his  foul,  from  day  to  day :  and 
 both  his  wcakncfs  of  body,  and  confolativ^n  of  mind,  continued 
 through  the  \veel<.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  June  24.  Extremely  feeble ;  fcarcc  able  to 
 walk:  however,  vilitcd  my  Indians,  and  took  much  pains  to 
 inftruct  them  ;  laboured  with  fome  that  were  much  difaffcft- 
 ed  to  Chriftianity.  My  mind  was  much  burdened  with  the 
 weight  and  difficulty  of  my  work.  T^-y  whole  dependence 
 and  hope  of  fuccefs  feemed  to  be  on  Gi-d  j  who  alone  1  law 
 could  mske  them  willing  to  receive  irftruftion.  My  heart 
 was  much  engaged  in  prayer,  lending  up  lilent  reqvefts  to 
 God,  even  while  I  was  fpeaking  to  them.  O  that  I  could 
 alwa)'s  go  in  the  ftrcngth  ot  the  LorJ ! 
 
 Monday,  June  15.  Was  fomething  better  in  health  thaa 
 of  late ;  was  able  to  fpend  a  conliderable  part  of  the  day  in 
 prayer  and  clofc  ftndies.  Bad  more  freedom  and  fervency  in 
 prayer  than  ufcal  of  late ;  efpecially  longed  for  the  prefcnce 
 cf  God  in  my  work,  and  that  the  poor  Heathen  n.ight  be 
 Converted.  And  in  evening-prayer  my  faith  and  hope  in  Goa 
 v'eie  much  rai fed.  To  an  eye  of  reafon  every  thing  that  re- 
 <pe6ls  the  converfion  of  the  Heathen  is  as  dark  as  midnight ; 
 and  yet  I  cannot  but  hope  in  God  tor  the  accon.plifhment 
 of  fimething  g!ori')Us  among  them.  Ky  foul  longed  much 
 for  the  advancement  of  the  Redeemer's  kingdom  on  earth. 
 Wz3  very  fearful  left  I  fhould  admit  fome  vain  thought,  and 
 io  iofe  the  fenfc  I  then  had  of  divine  things.  O  for  an  abi- 
 ding heavenly  temper! 
 
 '1'ue.Qiay,  June  26.  In  the  morning,  my  defires  feemed  to 
 rife,  and  afccnd  up  freely  to  God.  Was  bufy  mcft  of  the  day 
 in  tranflating  prayers  into  the  language  of  the  Delaware  In* 
 dians;  m.et  v  ith  great  difficulty,  by  reafon  that  my  interpreter 
 was  altogether  unacquainted  with  the  bufmcfs.  But  though 
 I  was  much  difcoursged  with  the  extreme  difficulty  of  that 
 work,  yet  God  fuppoited  m,e;  and  efpecially  in  the  evening, 
 gave  me  fwect  refrelhment:  in  prayer  iXiy  foul  was  enlarged, 
 and  my  faith  drawn  into  fcnfble  exercife ;  was  enabled  to  ciy 
 to  God  for  my  poor  Indians ;  and  though  the  work  of  their 
 converfion  appeared  ^*  inpoffible  with  n^an,  yet  with  God" 
 i  faw  '^  all  things  w'ere  poiTible."  ^':y  faith  was  much  ftrcngth- 
 ened,  by  <  bferving  the  wonderful  affiftance  God  afforded  his 
 fervrnts  Nehem.iah  and  Ezra,  in  reformang  his  people,  and 
 I e-eftabli filing  hi^  ancient  church.  I  was  much  alliikd  in 
 prayer  for  dear  Chrifti^n  friends,  and  for  others  that  I  ap- 
 prehended 
 
MLij.      Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  iiy 
 
 prehendel  to  be  Chriftlefs ;  but  was  more  efpecially  concern- 
 ed for  the  poor  Heathen,  and  thole  of  my  own  charge  :  was 
 enabled  x.o  b-  inftaac  In  prayer  for  them  ;  and  hoped  that  God 
 would  bjw  tne  neavens  aad  coine  down  for  their  ialvation. 
 It  fcemed  to  me,  there  could  be  no  impediment  fufficient  to 
 obftiuft  that  glorious  work,  feemg  the  living  God,  as  I 
 ftrongly  hoped,  was  engaged  for  it.  1  continued  in  a  lolemn 
 frame,  lifting  up  my  heait  to  God  for  aiTiftance  and  grace, 
 that  1  might  be  more  mortified  to  this  prefcnt  world,  that 
 my  whole  loui  might  be  taken  up  continually  in  concern  for 
 the  advancement  of  CnrilVs  kingd  jm:  longed  that  God  would 
 purge  me  more,  that  I  might  be  as  a  choien  vefTcl  to  bear  his 
 na  ne  among  the  Heathens.  Continued  in  this  frame  till  I 
 dr  )pped  alleep. 
 
 W"ednefday,  June  27.  Felt  fomething  of  the  fame  folemn 
 concern,  and  fpirit  of  prayer,  that  1  enj  )ycd  laft  night,  loon 
 after  I  rofe  in  the  morning. — In  the  afternoon,  rode  ieveral 
 miles  to  fee  if  I  could  procure  any  lands  for  the  poor  Indians, 
 that  they  might  live  together,  and  be  under  better  advantages 
 for  inftruftion.  ^¥hile  I  was  riding,  had  a  deep  fenfe  of  the 
 greatnefs  and  difficulty  of  my  work;  and  my  foul  feemed  to 
 rely  wholly  upon  God  for  fuccefs,  in  the  diligent  and  faith- 
 ful ufe  of  means.  Saw,  with  greateft  certainty,  that  tht  arm 
 of  the  Lord  muft  be  revealed,  for  the  help  of  thefe  poor  Hea- 
 then, if  ever  they  were  delivered  from  the  bondage  of  the 
 powers  of  darknefs.  Spent  moft  of  the  time,  while  riding,  in 
 lifting  up  my  heart  for  grace  and  afliftance. 
 
 Thurfday,  June  28.  Spent  the  morning,  in  reading  feve- 
 ral  parts  of  the  holy  fcrlpture,  and  in  fervent  prayer  for  my 
 Indians,  that  God  would  fet  up  his  kingdom  among  them, 
 and  bring  them  into  his  church. — About  nine,  I  withdrew  to 
 my  ufual  place  of  retirement  in  the  woods ;  and  there  again 
 enjoyed  fome  afliftance  in  prayer.  My  great  concern  was  for 
 the  converfion  of  the  Heathen  to  God  ;  and  the  Lord  helped 
 m^  to  plead  with  him  for  it.  Towards  noon,  rode  up  to  the 
 Indians,  in  order  to  preach  to  them  ;  and  while  going,  my 
 heart  went  up  to  God  in  prayer  for  them ;  could  freely  tell 
 God,  lie  knew  that  the  caiife  was  not  mine,  which  I  was  en- 
 gaged in  ;  but  it  was  his  own  caufe,  and  it  would  be  for  his 
 own  glory  to  convert  the  poor  Indians :  and  blcffed  be  God, 
 I  felt  no  defire  of  their  converfion,  that  I  might  receive  ho- 
 nour from  the  world,  as  being  the  inffrument  of  it.  Had 
 fome  freedom  in  ipcaking  to  the  Indians. 
 
 ;Thc  Bext  daj^,  he  fneaks  of  fome  ferioas  concern  for  the' 
 
 kiaiJom 
 
lit  T  H  E    L  I  P  E     O  F  J.D.  1744. 
 
 kingdom  of  the  blefled  Redeemer;  but  complains  much  of 
 barrennefs,  wanderings,  inaftivity,  6^c.] 
 
 Saturday,  June  30.  My  foul  was  much  folemnized  in  read- 
 ing God's  word;  efpecially  the  ninth  chapter  of  Daniel.  I  faw 
 how  God  had  called  out  his  fervants  to  prayer,  and  made  them 
 wrcftle  with  him,  when  he  defjgned  to  bcflow  any  great  mer- 
 cy on  his  church.  And,  alas !  I  was  afhamed  of  myfelf,  to 
 think  of  my  dulnefs  and  inactivity,  when  there  feemed  to  be 
 fo  much  Lo  do  for  the  upbuilding  of  Zion.  Oh,  how  does 
 Zion  lie  wafte !  I  longed,  that  the  church  of  God  might  be 
 enlarged :  was  enabled  to  pray,  I  think,  in  faith ;  my  foul 
 feemed  fenfibly  to  confide  in  God,  and  was  enabled  to  wreftle 
 with  him.  Afterwards,  walked  abroad  to  a  place  of  fweet 
 retirement,  and  enjoyed  fome  affiftance  in  prayer  again :  had 
 a  fenfe  of  my  great  need  of  divine  help,  and  felt  my  foul  fenfi- 
 bly depend  en  God.  Blefied  be  God,  this  has  been  a  com- 
 fortable week  to  me. 
 
 Lord's  day,  July  i.  In  the  morning,  was  perplexed  with 
 T,v«nd.enng  vain  thoughts ;  was  much  grieved,  judged  and 
 condeiT.ned  myfelf  before  God.  And  Oh,  how  miferablc  did 
 1  feel,  becaufe  I  could  not  live  to  God !  At  ten,  rode  away 
 with  a  heavy  heart,  to  preach  to  my  Indians.  Upon  the  road 
 I  attempted  to  lift  up  my  heart  to  God ;  but  was  infefted 
 with  an  unfettled  wandering  frame  of  mind;  and  was  exceed- 
 ing reuiefs  and  .perplexed,  and  filled  with  fhame  and  confufion 
 before  God.  I  feemed  to  myfelf  to  be  "  more  brutifh  than 
 *-■  any  man ;"  and  thought,  none  deferved  to  be  "  caft  out  of 
 *■■  God's  prefence"  fo  much  as  I.  If  I  attempted  to  lift  up 
 my  heart  to  God,  as  I  frequently  did  by  the  way,  on  a  fud- 
 dsn,  before  I  was  aware,  my  thoughts  were  w^andering  "  to 
 *'  the  ends  of  the  earth :"  and  my  foul  was  filled  with  fur- 
 prlfe  and  anxiety,  to  find  it  fhus.  Thus  alfo  after  I  came  to 
 the  Indians,  my  mind  was  confu fed ;  and  I  felt  nothing  fenfi- 
 bly of  that  fweet  reliance  on  God,  that  my  foul  has  been  com- 
 forted wath  in  days  pafl.  Spent  the  forenoon  in  this  pofiure 
 C-fmind,  and  preached  to  the  Indians  without  any  heart.  In 
 the  afternoon,  I  felt  ftill  barren,,  when  I  began  to  preach  ; 
 avA  after  about  half  au  hour,  I  feemed  to  mylelf  to  know  no- 
 thing, and  to  have  nothing  to  fay  to  the  Indians ;  but  foon 
 ::fter,  I  found  in  myfelf  a  ipirit  of  love,  and  warmth,  and  power, 
 to  adJrcls  the  poor  Indians ;  and  God  helped  me  to  plead  with 
 thsni,  to  "  turn  from  all  the  vanities  of  the  Heathen,  to  the 
 **  living  God :"  and  1  am  perfuaded,  the  Lord  touched  their 
 ^o:>iclence3  j  for  I  never  faw  fuch  attention  raifed  in  them  be- 
 fore. 
 
Mi.'^-J'     M*    DAVID     BRAIN  EUD,  rip 
 
 fore.  And  when  I  came  away  from  them,  I  fpent  the  whole 
 tune  while  I  was  riding  to  my  lodgings,  three  miles  diftant,- 
 in  prayer  and  praife  to  God.  And  after  I  had  rode  more 
 than  two  miles,  it  came  into  my  mind  to  dedicate  myfelf  to 
 God  again ;  which  I  did  with  great  folemnity,  and  unfpeak^ 
 able  fatisfatlion ;  efpecially  gave  up  myfelf  to  him  renewedly 
 in  the  work  of  the  miniftry.  And  this  I  did  by  divine  grace^ 
 I  hope,  without  any  exception  or  referve ;  not  in  the  leaft 
 /hrinking  back  from  any  difficulties,  that  might  attend  this- 
 great  and  bleffed  work.  I  feemed  to  be  moft  free,  chearful, 
 and  full  in  this  dedication  of  myfelf  My  whole  foul  cried, 
 "  Lord,  to  thee  I  dedicate  myfelf:  O  accept  of  me,  and  let 
 *'  me  be  thine  for  ever.  Lord,  I  defire  nothing  clfe ;  I  de* 
 **  lire  nothing  more.  O  come,  come.  Lord,  accept  a  poor 
 '*  worm.  Whom  have  I  in  heaven  hut  thee  ?  and  there  is  none 
 "  upon  earth,  that  I  defire  bejides  thee.''''  After  this,  was  en- 
 abled to  praife  God  with  my  whole  foul,  that  he  had  enabled 
 me  to  devote  and  confecrate  all  my  powers  to  him  in  this  fo- 
 lemn  manner.  My  heart  rejoiced  in  my  particular  work  as  a 
 m-iji  nary  i  rejoiced  in  my  neceffity  of  felf-denial  in  many  re- 
 •fperl:-  and  ftill  continued  to  give  up  myfelf  to  God,  and 
 implore  mercy  of  him;  praying  inceflantly,  every  moment, 
 ■witi:  f weet  fervency.  My  nature  being  very  weak  of  late, 
 and  much  fpent,  was  now  confiderably  overcome  :  my  fingers 
 grew  very  feeble,  and  fomewhat  numb,  fo  that  I  could 
 fcarcely  ftretch  them  out  ftraight ;  and  when  I  lighted  from  . 
 jny  horfe,  could  hardly  walk,  my  joints  feemed  all  to  be 
 loofed.  But  I  felt  abundant  Jlrength  in  the  inner  man. 
 Preached  to  the  white  people :  God  helped  me  much,  efpe- 
 fcially  in  prayer.  Sundry  of  my  poor  Indians  were  fo  moved 
 as  to  come  to  meeting  alfo ;  and  one  appeared  much  concern- 
 ed. 
 
 Monday,  July  2.  Had  fome  reliih  of  the  divine  comforts 
 •f  yeflerday ;  but  could  not  get  that  warmth  and  exercife  of 
 faith,  that  I  defired.  Had  fometimes  a  diftreffing  fenfe  of 
 my  part  follies,  and  prefent  ignorance  and  barrenncfs :  and 
 efpecially  in  the  afternoon,  was  funk  down  under  a  load  of  fin 
 and  guilt,  in  that  I  had  lived  fo  little  to  God,  after  his  abun^ 
 dant  goodnefs  to  me  yefterday.  In  the  evening,  though  very 
 weak,  was  enabled  to  pray  with  fervency,  and  to  continue  in- 
 llant  in  prayer,  near  an  hour.  My  foul  mourned  over  the 
 power  of  its  corruption,  and  longed  exceedingly  to  be  ivafied 
 and  purged  as  with  hyffhp.  Was  enabled  to  pray  for  my  dear 
 abfent  friends,  Chrift's  minifters,  and  his  church  ;  and  enjoyed 
 •inch  freedom  and  fervency,  but  n9t  f«  much  comfort,  by 
 
 reafoii 
 
120  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F  A.D,  1744; 
 
 jreafon  of  guilt  and  (hame  before  God. — Judged  and  condem* 
 ned  myfelf  for  the  follies  of  the  day. 
 
 Tuefday,  July  3.  Was  fllll  very  weak.  This  morning, 
 was  enabled  to  pray  under  a  feeling  fenle  of  my  need  of  help 
 from  God,  and,  1  truft,  had  fome  faith  in  exercife ;  and, 
 blefied  be  God,  was  enabled  to  plead  with  God  a  confiderable 
 time.  Truly  God  is  good  to  me.  But  my  loul  mourned, 
 and  was  grieved  at  my  llnfulnefs  and  barrennels,  and  longed 
 to  be  mure  engaged  for  God.  Near  nine,  withdrew  agaia 
 for  prayer;  and  througli  divine  goodnefs,  had  the  blclfed  bpi- 
 rit  of  prayer;  my  foul  loved  the  duty,  and  longed  for  God  in 
 it.  O  it  is  fweet  to  be  the  Lord's,  to  be  fenfibly  devoted  to 
 him!  What  a  blefied  poition  is  God!  How  glorious,  how 
 lovely  in  himfelf  I     O  my  foul  longed  to  impro^  e  time  wholly 
 
 for  God! Spent  mort  of  the  day  in  tranflating  prayers  in^- 
 
 to  Indian. In  the  evening,  was  enabled  again  to  wieftle 
 
 with  God  in  prayer  with  fervency.  Was  enabled  to  m-aintain 
 a  felf-ditfident  and  watchful  frame  of  fpirit,  in  the  evening, 
 and  was  jealous  and  afraid  lefi  1  fiiould  admit  careleiTnels  aiid 
 felf-confidence. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  feems  to  have  had  fpecial  aflillance  and 
 fervency  mofl  of  the  day,  but  in  a  lefs  degree  than  the  pre* 
 ceding  day.  Thurfday  was  fpent  in  great  bodily  weakncfs ; 
 yet  feems  to  have  been  fpent  in  continual  and  exceeding  pain- 
 fulnefs  in  religion ;  but  in  great  bitternefs  of  fpirit  by  reaion 
 ef  his  vilenefs  and  corruption ;  he  fays  thu?,  *'  I  thought 
 "  there  was  not  one  creatuie  living  fo  vile  as  I.  Oh,  my  in- 
 ^  ward  pollution !     Oh,    my  guilt  and  Ihame  before  God ! 
 
 *' 1  know  not  what  to  do.     Oh,  I  longed  ardently  to  be 
 
 **  cleanfcd  and  wa(hed  from  the  ftains  of  inward  pollution ! 
 "  Oh,  to  be  made  like  God,  or  rather  to  be  made  fit  for  God 
 **  to  ov/n !"] 
 
 Friday,  July  6.  Awoke  this  morning  in   the  fear  of  God : 
 
 foon  called  to  mind  mj'  ladnelb  in  the  evening  pafi: ;  and  fpent 
 my  firft  waking  minutes  in  prayer  for  fanfrificaticn,  that  my 
 fjul  might  be  waflied  from  its  exceeding  pollution  and  dtfile- 
 jnent.  After  I  arofe,  I  fpent  fome  time  in  reading  God's 
 word  and  prayer:  1  cried  to  God  under  a    fenfe  of  my  great 
 
 indigency. lam,  of  late,  mofl  of  all  concerned  for  mini- 
 
 fierial  qualifications,  and  the  converfion  of  the  Heathen: 
 lad  year,  I  longed  to  be  prepared  for  a  world  of  glory,  and 
 fpeedily  to  depart  out  of  this  world;  but  of  late  all  my  concern 
 almoft  is  for  the  converfion  of  the  Heathen ;    and   for  that 
 
 end, 
 
Mi't7-        Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  1  N  E  R  D.  J2x 
 
 end,  I  long  to  live.     But  blcffed  be  God,  I  have  lefs  defire  to 
 Jive  for  any  ot  the  pieariut s  oi  the  \vorld,    than  ever    I  had ; 
 I  long  and  love  to  be  a  pilgiim  ;    and  want  grace  to    imitate 
 the  lite,  labours,  and  lufferings  of   St  Paul  among  the  Hea- 
 then.    And  when  I  long  tor  h^jlinefs  now,  it  is  not  fo  much 
 for  myfelf  as  formerly  ;  but  rather  that  thereby  I  may  become 
 an  "  able  minilter  of  the  Ncw-Teftament,"  elpeciaily  to  the 
 Heathen.     Spent  about  two  hours  this  morning  in  reading 
 ;  and  prayer  by  turns;  and  v^'as  in  a  watchful  tender  frame,  a- 
 I  fraid  of  every  thmg  that  might  cool  my  afreftions,    and  draw 
 tiway  my  heart  from  God.     Was   foniething  Ifrengthened  ire 
 my  ftudies ;  but  near  night  was  very  weak  and  weary. 
 
 Saturday,  July  7.  VVao  veiy  much  di (ordered  this  morn- 
 ing, and  my  vigour  all  fpent  and  exhaulfed :  but  was  alfedfed 
 and  refrelhcd  in  reading  the  fweet  ftory  of  Elijah's  tranllation^ 
 and  enjoyed  fome  affection  and  fervency  in  prayer :  longed 
 much  for  miniftcrial  gifts  and  graces,  that  I  might  dn  ibme- 
 thing  in  the  caufe  of  God.  Afterwards  was  refrcfhed  and  in- 
 vigorated, while  reading  Mr  Joleph  Alleine'i  iirff  cafe  of  con« 
 Icicnce,  cc.  and  enabled  then  to  pray  with  fome  ardour  of 
 foul,  and  was  afraid  of  carelelTnels  and  felf-confidence,  and 
 longed  for  holinefs. 
 
 Lord'-->  day,  July  8.  Was  ill  lafl  night,  not  able  to  rsft 
 quietly.  Hdd  fome  I'mall  degree  of  alliflance  in  preaching  to 
 the  Indian^;  and  afterwards  was  enabled  to  preach  to  the 
 white  people  with  fome  power,  efpecially  in  the  clofe  of  my 
 difcjurfe,  from  Jcr.  iii.  23.  The  Lord  alio  alTilfed  me  in  fome 
 meafure  in  the  fii  ft  prayer  :  bleffcd  be  his  name.  Near  night, 
 though  very  weary,  was  enabled  to  read  God's  word  with 
 fome  fweet  relifh  of  it,  and  to  pray  with  affeftion,  fervency, 
 and  (I  truft)  faith :  my  foul  was  more  fenfibly  dependent  oa 
 God  than  ufual.  Was  watchful,  tender,  and  jealous  of  my 
 own  heart,  left  I  fhould  admit  careleffnefs  and  vain  thoughts, 
 i  and  grieve  the  blefTed  Spirit,  fo  that  he  ftiould  withdraw  his 
 fweet,  kind,  and  tender  influences.  Longed  to  "depart,  and 
 *'  be  with  Chiift,"  more  than  at  any  time  of  late.  My  fcti 
 was  exceedingly  united  to  the  faints  of  ancient  tim.es,  Ss  well 
 as  thofe  now  living ;  elpeciaily  my  foul  melted  for  the  f^^ciety 
 of  Elijah  and  Elifha.  Was  enabled  to  cry  to  God  with  a 
 child-like  fpiiit,  and  to  continue  inflant  in  prayer  for  fome 
 time.  Was  much  enlarged  in  the  fweet  duty  of  infcrccflion  ; 
 was  enabled  to  remembei  great  numbers  of  dear  friends,  and 
 precious  fouls,  as  well  as  Chrift's  miniflcrs.  Continued  in 
 this  frame,  afraid  of  every  idle  thought,  till  I  dropped  a- 
 fleep. 
 
 Q_  Monday, 
 
122  T  H  E     L  I  r  E     O  F  J.D,  174-4. 
 
 Monday,  July  9.  Was  under  much  illnefs  of  body  moft  of 
 the  day,  and  not  able  to  fit  up  the  whole  day.  Towards  night, 
 felt  a  litLle  better.  Then  fpent  fome  time  in  reading  God's 
 word  and  prayer ;  enjoyed  fome  degree  of  fervency  and  af- 
 feftion;  was  enabled  to  plead  with  God  for  his  caufe  and 
 kingdjm :  and,  through  divine  goodnefs,  it  was  apparent  to 
 Jiie,  thar  it  was  his  caufe  I  pleaded  for,  and  not  my  own  ;  and 
 was  enabled  to  make  this  an  argument  with  God  to  anfwer  my 
 lecueils. 
 
 TuefJay,  July  10.  Was  very  ill,  and  full  of  pain,  and  very 
 
 dull  and  fpiritlefs. In  the  evening,  had  an  affefting  fenfe 
 
 of  my  ignorance,  d;c.  and  of  ray  need  of  God  at  all  times,  to 
 do  every  thing  for  mo ;  and  my  foul  was  huu.bkd  before 
 God. 
 
 Wednefday,  July  11.  Was  fllll  exercifcd  with  illnefs  and 
 pain.  Had  fume  dt^j^icc  of  affefiion  and  warmth  in  prayer 
 and  reading  God's  word  :  longed  for  Abrahaai's  faith  and 
 fellowlliip  with  God;  and  felt  Ijme  refoluti.n  to  fpend  ail  my 
 time  for  God^  and  to  exert  myfelf  with  more  fervency  in 
 his  fervicc ;  but  found  my  body  wf^ak  and  feeble.  In  the 
 afternoon,  though  very  ill,  wa^  enabled  to  fpend  fome  confi- 
 derablc  time  in  prayer  ;  fpent  indeed  m;)ft:  of  the  day  in  that 
 exercife  ;  and  my  foul  was  diffident,  watchful,  and  tender,  Icfk 
 I  fhould  otfend  my  bleffed  Friend,  in  thought  or  behaviour. 
 I  am  perfuaded  my  foul  confided  in,  and  leaned  upun  the 
 bleffed  God.     Oh,  what  need  did  I  fee  myfelf  to  fland  in  of 
 
 God  at  all  times,  to  alfifi  me  and  lead  me  ! Found  a  great 
 
 want  of  ilirength  and  vigour^  both  in  the  outward  and  inner 
 man. 
 
 [The  exerclfes  and  experiences,  that  he  fpeaks  of  in  the 
 next  nine  days,  are  very  fimilar  to  thofe  of  the  preceding  days 
 of  this  and  the  foregoing  week  ;  a  fenfe  of  his  own  weaknefs, 
 ignorance,  unprofitablenefs,  and  vilenefs  ;  lothing  and  ab- 
 horring himfelf;  felf-difiidence  ;  fenfe  of  the  greatnefs  of  his 
 work,  and  his  great  need  of  divine  help,  and  the  extreme  dan- 
 ger o&fclf-confidence  ;  longing  for  holinefs  and  humility,  and 
 to  be  fitted  for  his  vvoik,  and  to  live  to  God;  and  longing 
 for  the  converfion  of  the  InJiaus ;  and  thefe  things  to  a  very 
 great  degree.] 
 
 Saturday,  July  21.  This  morning,  was  greatly  opprefTed 
 with  guilt  and  fliarne,  from  a  fenfe  of  inward  vilenels  and 
 pollution.  About  nine,  withdrew  to  the  woods  for  prayer  ; 
 but, had  not  much  coniioit;  I  appeared  to  myfelf  the  vilefl, 
 
 meanelt 
 
^^  27.       Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  123 
 
 rneaneft  creature  upon  earth,  and  could  fcarcely  live  v/kh  my- 
 i'elf;  fo  mean  and  vile  I  appeared,  that  I  thought  I  ihc  uld  ne- 
 ver be  able  to  hold  up  my  face  in  heaven,  if  God  of  his  infi- 
 nite grace  fhould  bring  me  thither.  Towards  night  my  bur- 
 den re  fpc6ling  my  work  among  the  In^lians  began  to  incrcafe 
 much ;  and  was  aggravated  by  hearing  fundry  things  that 
 looked  very  difcouraging,  in  particv.lar  that  they  intended  to 
 meet  together  the  next  day  for  an  idolatrous  feaft  and  dance. 
 Then  I  began  to  be  in  anguish:  I  thought  I  muft  in  con- 
 fciencc  go  and  endeavour  to  break  them  vp ;  and  knew  not 
 how  to  attempt  fuch  a  thing.  However,  I  withdrew  for 
 prayer,  hoping  for  Ifrength  from  above.  And  in  prayer  I  was 
 exceedingly  enlarged,  and  my  foul  Vv'as  as  much  drawn  out  as 
 ever  I  remember  it  to  have  been  in  my  life,  or  near.  I  was 
 in  fuch  anguilh,  and  pleaded  with  fo  much  earneflnefs  and  im- 
 portunity, that  when  I  rofc  from  my  knees  I  felt  extremely 
 weak  and  overcome,  I  could  fcarcely  walk  flraight,  my  joints 
 were  loofed,  the  fweat  ran  down  my  face  and  body,  and  na- 
 ture fccmed  as  if  it  would  difTolve.  So  far  as  I  could  judge, 
 I  was  wholly  free  from  lelfifh  ends  in  my  fervent  fupplications 
 for  the  poor  Indians.  I  knew,  they  were  met  together  to 
 worfhip  devils,  and  not  God  ;  and  this  made  me  cry  earneftly, 
 that  God  would  now  appear,  and  help  me  in  my  attempts  to 
 break  up  this  idolatrous  meeting.  My  foul  pleaded  long;  and 
 I  thought,  God  would  hear,  and  would  go  with  me  to  vindi- 
 cate his  own  caufe  :  I  feemed  to  confide  in  God  for  his  pre- 
 fence  and  affiftance.  And  thus  I  fpent  the  evening,  praying 
 incelfantly  for  divine  aifiifance,  and  that  I  might  not  be  felf- 
 dependent,  but  (Hll  have  my  whole  dependence  upon  God. 
 What  I  pafTcd  through  was  remarkable,  and  indeed  inexprel- 
 ilble.  All  things  here  below  vanifhed  ;  and  there  appeared 
 to  be  nothing  of  any  confiderable  importaryce  to  me,  but  ho- 
 linefs  of  heart  and  life,  a^id  the  converfion  of  the  Heathen  to 
 God.  All  my  cares,  fears,  and  defires,  which  might  be  faid 
 to  be  of  a  worldly  nature,  dilappeared  ;  and  were,  in  my  e- 
 fteem,  of  little  more  imp  :)rtance  than  a  pulFof  wind.  I  ex- 
 ceedingly longed,  that  God  would  get  to  himfelf  a  name  among 
 the  Heathen;  and  I  appealed  to  him  with  the  greateft  free- 
 dom, that  he  knew  1  '"'preferred  him  above  my  chief  joy.** 
 Indeed,  I  had  no  notion  of  joy  from  this  world;  I  cared  not 
 where  or  how  I  lived,  or  what  hardlbips  I  went  through,  fo 
 that  I  could  but  gain  fouls  to  Chrill.  I  continued  in  this 
 frame  all  the  evening  and  night.  V/hile  I  was  allcep,  I 
 dreamed  of  thefe  things;  and  w^hcn  I  ivakedy  (as  I  frequently 
 
 d  2  did;, 
 
124  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  J.  D.  1744. 
 
 did),  the  ii'.fl:  thing  I  thought  of  was  this  great  work  of  plead- 
 ing for  God  againlt  Satan. 
 
 Lord's  da}',  July  22.  When  I  waked,  my  foul  was  bur- 
 dened with  what  feemed  to  be  before  me  :  I  cried  to  God,  be- 
 fore I  could  get  out  of  my  bed:  and  as  foon  as  I  was  drefTed, 
 I  withdrew  i^.Uo  the  woods,  to  pour  out  my  burdened  foul  to 
 God,  efpecially  for  alTiftance  in  my  great  woik  ;  tor  ]  could 
 fcarccly  think  of  any  thing  elfe:  and  enjoyed  the  fanje  hte- 
 d(?m  and  fervency  as  the  laft  evening  ;  and  did  with  unlpcak- 
 able  freedom  give  up  myfelf  afrefli  to  God,  for  life  or  death, 
 tor  all  hardfliips  he  Hiould  call  mc  to  among  the  Heathen ;  and 
 felt  as  if  nothing  could  dilcourage  me  from  thit.  bltffed  work. 
 I  had  a  ftrong  hope,  that  God  would  "bow  the  heavens  and 
 ^^  come  down,''  and  do  f)me  maivcUous  work  among  the 
 Heathen.  And  when  I  was  riding  to  the  Indians,  three 
 mileS)  my  heait  was  c^'ntinually  going  up  to  God  for  his 
 prefcnce  and  afiiltance ;  and  hoping,  and  almoft  expect- 
 ing, that  God  would  make  thi>  the  day  of  his  power  and  grace 
 aniongft  tht  poor  Indians.  When  1  came  to  them,  I  found 
 them  engaged  in  theii  frolic  ;  but  thnugh  divine  goodncls  I 
 got  them  to  break  up  and  attend  to  my  preaching  :  yet  flill 
 there  appeared  nothing  of  the  fpccia!  power  of  God  among 
 fhem,.  Preached  again  to  them  in  the  atternoon  ;  and  obier- 
 ^•ed  the  Indians  were  more  fober  than  before  :  but  Oill  law  no- 
 thing fpecial  among  them  ;  from  whence  Satan  took  occafioii 
 to  tempt  and  buffet  me  with  thefe  curled  luggcflions,  1  here 
 Jino  God,  or  if  there  be,  he  is  not  able  to  convert  the  Indians, 
 before  they  have  more  knowledge,  i,c.  I  was  very  weak  and 
 weary,  and  my  foul  borne  down  with  perplexity  ;  but  was 
 mortified  to  all  the  world,  and  was  dv-tt  rmined  frill  to  wait  up- 
 on God  for  the  converfion  of  the  Heathen,  though  the  devil 
 tempted  mc  to  the  contrary. 
 
 Monday,  July  23.  Retained  ftill  a  deep  and  preffing  fenfe 
 of  what  lay  with  lo  much  weight  upon  me  ytfterday:  but 
 was  more  calm  and  quiet ;  enjoyed  freedom  and  corr.pofure, 
 after  the  temptations  of  the  laft  evening  :  had  Iwect  refigna- 
 rion  to  the  divine  will;  and  delired  nothing  fo  much  as  the 
 convex  iion  of  the  Heathen  to  God,  and  that  his  kingdom 
 night  come  in  my  own  heart,  and  the  hearts  of  others.  Rode 
 to  a  fettlement  of  Iri(h  people,  about  fifteen  miles  fouth-wefr- 
 waid  ;  (pert  my  time  in  prayer  and  meditation   by   the   way. 
 
 Near  night,  preached  from  JV:atth.  v.  3. God  was  pleafed 
 
 to  afford  m.e  lome  degree  f'f  freedom    and  fervency.      Eleffed 
 be  G<,d  for  any  meafi  re  of  affillance. 
 1  uefday,  j uly  24.  Rode  about  leventeen miles  wefluard,  over 
 
 4 
 
Jkt.1.7'       '^^    D  A  V  T  D     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  12^ 
 
 a  hideous  mountain,  to  a  number  of  Indians.  Got  together  near 
 thirty  of  them  :  preached  to  th«m  in  the  evening,  and  lodged 
 among  them  *. —  Was  weak,  and  felt  fomething  diCconfolate : 
 yet  could  have  no  freedom  in  the  thought  ot  any  other  cir- 
 cumftances  or  bufmefs  in  life  :  all  my  d.fne  was  the  conver- 
 fion  oi  the  Heathen,  and  all  my  hope  was  in  God  :  God  does 
 not  fuff^r  me  to  pkafe  or  c  )mfort  myfelf  with  hopes  of  feeing 
 friends,  returning  to  my  dear  accjuamtance,  and  enjoying 
 worldly  comforts. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  preached  to  thefe  Indians  again  ;  and 
 then  returned  to  the  Irilh  iectiement,  and  there  preached  to  a 
 numerous  congregation:  there  was  a  coniideiable  appear- 
 ance of  awakening  in  the  congregation.  Thurlday,  he  re- 
 turned home,  exceedingly  fatigued  and  fpent ;  ffill  in  the  fame 
 frame  of  m^rtificaiion  to  the  world,  and  fulicitous  for  the 
 advancement  of  Chrift's  kingdom :  and  on  this  day  he  f  .ys 
 thus  :  "  I  have  felt,  this  week,  more  ol  the  fpirit  of  2i  pilgrim 
 *'  on  earth,  than  perhaps  ever  before  ;  and  yet  fo  delirous 
 "  to  fee  Zion's  profperity,  that  I  was  not  (o  willing  to  leave 
 *'  this  fcene  of  forrow  as  I  ufed  to  be." — The  two  remaining 
 days  of  the  week,  he  was  very  ill,  and  cries  out  of  wander- 
 ings, dulnefs,  and  want  of  fpiritual  fervency  and  fweetnefs- 
 On  the  Sabbath,  he  was  confined  by  illnefs,  not  rible  to  go 
 out  to  preach.  After  this,  his  illnefs  increafed  upon  him, 
 and  he  continued  very  ill  all  the  week  f  ;  and  fays,  that  *'  he 
 *'  thought  he  never  before  endured  fuch  a  feafon  of  diflrelling 
 "  weaknefs  ;  and  that  his  nature  was  fo  fpent,  that  he  could 
 ''  neither  fland,  fit,  nor  lie  with  any  quiet ;  and  that  he  was 
 "  exercifed  with  extreme  faintnefs  and  ficknefs  at  his  fto- 
 '*  mach ;  and  that  his  mind  was  as  much  difordered  as  his 
 "  body,  feeming  to  be  ftupid,  and  v;ithout  all  kind  of  affec- 
 '*'  tions  towards  all  objefts ;  and  yet  perplexed,  to  think, 
 "  that  he  lived  for  nothing,  that  precious  time  rolled  away, 
 *•'  and  he  could  do  nothing  but  trifle  :  and  fpeaks  of  it  as  a 
 "  feafon  wherein  Satan  buffeted  him  with  fome  peculiar  tem|5- 
 "  tations." — Concerning  the  next  five  days  he  writes  thus, 
 "  Oi  Lord's  day,  Augufl  5.  was  IHII  very  poor.  But 
 *'  though  very  weak,  I  vifited  and  preached  to  the  poor 
 "  Indians  tvi'ice,  and  was  flrengthened  vaftly  beyond  my  ex- 
 
 *  See  Mr  Brainerd's  narrative  at  the  end  of  his  ordinatloK-fer- 
 jnan,  p    54 
 
 t  This  week,  on  Tucfday,  he  wrote  the  fourth  letter  added  at 
 the  ead  of  tljis  account. 
 
 "  pe(5tr.tions. 
 
126  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F  J.  D.  1744. 
 
 "  pcftations.  And  indeed,  the  Lord  gave  me  fome  freedom  and 
 "  fervency  in  addrefling  them ;  though  I  had  not  ftrength  e- 
 '*  nough  to  (land,  but  was  obliged  to  lit  down  the  whole  time. 
 *'  Towards  night,  was  extremely  weak,  faint,  fick,  and  full 
 *'  of  pain.  And  thus  I  have  continued  much  in  the  fame 
 "  ftate  that  I  was  in  laft  week,  through  the  moft  of  this,  (it 
 *'  being  now  Friday),  unable  to  engage  in  ajiy  bufmefs ;  fre- 
 *'  quently  unable  to  pray  in  the  family.  I  am  obliged  to  let 
 "  all  my  thoughts  and  concerns  run  at  random ;  for  I  have 
 "  neither  ftrength  to  read,  meditate,  or  pray :  and  this  natu- 
 "  rally  perplexes  my  mind.  I  fecm  to  myfelf  like  a  man 
 *'  that  has  all  his  eftate  embarked  in  one  fmall  boat,  unhap- 
 "  pily  going  adrift,  down  a  fwift  torrent.     The  poor  owner 
 
 "  ilands  OH  the  Ihore,  and  looks,  and  laments  his  lofs. 
 
 "  But,  alas !  though  my  all  feems  to  be  adrift,  and  I  (land 
 ''  and  fee  it,  I  dare  not  lament ;  for  this  fmks  my  fpirits 
 **  more,  and  aggravates  my  bodily  diforders!  I  am  forced 
 "  therefore  to  divert  myfelf  with  trifles ;  although  at  tke 
 "  fame  time  I  am  afraid,  and  often  feel  as  if  I  was  guilty  of 
 '^  the  mifimprovement  of  time.  And  oftentimes  my  con- 
 *'  icicnce  is  io  exercifed,  with  this  raiferable  way  of  ipending 
 **  timc^  that  I  have  no  peace  ;  though  I  have  no  ftrength  of 
 "  mind  or  body  to  improve  it  to  better  purpofe.  O  that  God 
 "  would  pity  my  diftreffed  flate  I" 
 
 The  next  three  weeks  after  this,  his  illnefs  was  not  fo  ex- 
 treme ;  he  was  in  fome  degree  capable  of  bufmefs,  both  pub- 
 lic and  private  ;  (although  he  had  fome  turns  wherein  his  in- 
 difpofition  prevailed  to  a  great  degree) :  he  alfo  in  this  fpace 
 had,  for  the  moft  parr,  much  more  inward  alTiftance,  and 
 llrength  of  mind  :  he  often  exprefTes  great  longings  for  the 
 enlargement  of  Chrifl's  kingdom ;  efpecially  by  the  conver- 
 fion  of  the  Heathen  to  God  :  he  fpeaks  of  his  hope  of  this 
 as  all  his  delight  and  joy.  He  continues  ftill  to  exprcfs  his 
 ufual  longings  after  holinefs,  and  living  to  God,  and  his  fcnle 
 of  his  own  Linworthinefs  :  he  fevc  al  times  fpeaks  of  his  ap- 
 pearing to  himfelf  the  vileft  creature  on  earth  ;  and  once 
 ilyj,  that  he  verily  thought  there  were  none  of  God's  children 
 who  fell  fo  far  (hort  of  that  holin«fs,  and  perfecflion  in  their 
 obedience,  which  God  requires,  as  he.  He  fpeaks  of  his 
 feeling  more  dead  than  ever  to  the  enjoyments  of  the  world. 
 He  fumetimes  mentions  fpecial  affiftance  that  he  had  in  this 
 fpace  of  time,  in  preaching  to  the  Indians,  and  of  appearan- 
 ces of  religious  concern  among  them.  He  fpeaks  alfo  of  aflift- 
 ance  in  prayer  for  abfent  friends,  and  efpecially  minifters 
 and  candidates  for  the  miniftryj  and  of  much  comfort  he  en- 
 joyed 
 
J£f.  at'        Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.         127 
 
 joyed  in  the  company  of  fome  minifters  that  came  to  vifit 
 kira.] 
 
 Saturday,  September  i.  Was  (o  far  ftrengthened,  after  a. 
 feafon  of  great  weaknefs,  that  I  was  able  to  fpend  two  or 
 three  hours  m  writing  on  a  divine  fubje^k.  Enjoyed  fomc 
 comfort  and  fweetnefs  in  things  divine  and  facred  :  and  as  my 
 bodily  ftrength  was  in  fome  mcafure  reflored,  io  my  foul  feem- 
 «d  to  be  fomewhat  vigorous,  and  engaged  in  the  things  of 
 God. 
 
 Lord's  day,  September  1.  Was  enabled  to  fpcak  to  my 
 poor  Indians  with  much  concern  and  fervency ;  and  I  am 
 perfuaded,  God  enabled  me  to  exercife  faith  in  him,  while 
 I  was  Ipeaking  to  them.  I  perceived,  that  fome  of  them 
 were  afraid  to  hearken  to,  and  embrace  Chrifiianlty,  left  they 
 ftiould  be  inchanted  and  poifoned  by  fome  of  the  poxvoivs  .• 
 but  I  was  enabled  to  plead  with  them  not  to  fear  thefe  ;  and 
 confiding  in  God  for  fafety  and  deliverance,  I  bid  a  chal- 
 lenge to  all  thefe  powers  ofdarknejs,  to  do  their  worft  upon 
 me  firft :  I  told  my  people,  I  was  a  Ch'ijlian,  and  afked  them 
 why  the  poivoivs  did  not  bewitch  and  poifon  me.  I  fcarcely 
 •ver  felt  more  fenfible  of  my  own  unworthincfs,  than  in  this 
 aftion :  I  faw,  that  the  honour  of  God  was  concerned  in  the 
 affair ;  and  I  dcfired  to  be  preferved,  not  from  fclfifh  views, 
 but  for  a  teftimony  of  the  divine  power  and  goodnefs,  and 
 of  the  truth  of  Chriftianity,  and  that  God  might  be  glorified. 
 Afterwards,  I  found  my  foul  rejoice  in  God  for  his  aHiiling 
 grace. 
 
 [After  this,  he  went  a  journey  into  New-England,  and  was 
 abfent  from  the  place  of  his  abode,  at  the  Forks  of  Delaware, 
 about  three  weeks.  He  was  in  a  feeble  ftate  the  greater  part 
 of  the  time.  But  in  the  latter  part  of  the  journey,  he  found 
 he  gained  much  in  health  and  ftrength.  And  as  to  the  (late 
 of  his  mind,  and  his  religious  and  fpiiitual  excrcifes,  it  was 
 much  with  him  as  had  been  before  ufual  in  journeys ;  excepting 
 that  the  frame  of  his  mind  feemcd  more  generally  to  be  com- 
 fortable. But  yet  there  are  complaints  of  fome  uncomfort- 
 able feafons,  want  of  fervency,  and  want  of  retirements,  and 
 time  alone  with  God.  In  this  journey,  he  did  not  forget  the 
 Indians ;  but  once  and  again  fpeaks  of  his  longing  for  their 
 eonverfion.] 
 
 Wedncfday,  September  26.  Rode  home  to  the  Forks  of 
 Delaware.     What  reafon  have  I  to  bkfs   Sod,  who  has  pre- 
 ferved 
 
lae  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F  y.  D.  1744, 
 
 ferved  me  in  riding  more  than  four  hundred  and  twenty  miles, 
 and  has  "  kept  all  my  bones,  that  not  one  of  them  has  been 
 "  broken  I"  My  health  likewife  is  greatly  recovered.  O  that 
 I  could  dedicate  my  ail  to  God !  1  his  is  all  the  return  1  can 
 make  to  him. 
 
 Thurflay,  September  27.  Was  fomething  melancholy; 
 had  not  much  freedom  and  comfort  in  prayer  ;  my  foul  is  dil^ 
 con  folate,  when  G  )d  is  withdrawn. 
 
 Friday,  September  28.  Spent  the  day  in  prayer,  reading, 
 and  writing.  Felt  fome  fmall  degree  of  warmth  in  prayer, 
 and  fome  defires  of  the  enlargement  of  Chriit's  kingdom  by 
 the  converfun  of  the  Heathen,  i^nd  tliat  God  would  make 
 me  a  ^*  chofen  vcfF^l,  to  bear  lii?  name  before  them :"  longecj 
 for  grace  to  enable  me  to  be  taithful. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  fpeaks  of  the  fame  longings  for  the  ad- 
 vancement of  Chrift's  kingdom,  and  the  con^eiiiun  of  the  In- 
 dians ;  but  complains  greatly  of  the  ill  effcft^  of  the  diver- 
 fions  of  his  late  journey,  as  unfixing  his  mind  from  that  de- 
 gree of  engagcdnefs-,  fervency,  watchfulnefs,  Cc  which  he 
 enjoyed  before.  And  the  like  complaints  are  continued  the 
 next  day.] 
 
 Monday,  Oftober  i.  Was  engaged  this  day  in  making  pre- 
 paration for  my  intended  jouiney  to  Sufquahannah :  with- 
 drew fevcral  times  to  the  woods  for  fecret  duties,  and  endea- 
 voured to  plead  for  the  divine  pre  fence  to  go  with  me  to  the 
 poor  Pagans,  to  whom  I  was  going  to  preach  the  golpel. 
 Towards  night  rode  about  four  miles,  and  met  brother  By- 
 ram  * ;  who  was  come,  at  my  defire,  to  be  my  companion 
 in  travel  to  the  Indians.  I  rejoiced  to  fee  him;  and,  I  truft, 
 God  made  his  converfation  profitable  to  me  :  I  faw  him,  as  I 
 thought,  more  dead  to  the  world,  its  anxious  cares,  and  al- 
 luring obje6ls,  than  I  was ;  and  this  made  me  look  within  my- 
 felf,  and  gave  me  a  greater  fenfe  of  my  guilt,  ingratitude,  and 
 mifery. 
 
 Tuefday,  Oftober  2.  Set  out  on  my  journey,  in  com- 
 pany  with  dear  brother  By  ram,  and  my  interpreter,  and  tvi'o 
 cnief  Indians  from  the  Forks  of  Delaware.  Travelled  about 
 twenty-five  miles,  and  lodged  in  one  of  the  laft  houfes  on  our 
 road ;  after  which  there  was  nothing  but  a  hideous  and  howl- 
 ing ivildernefs. 
 
 *  Minifler  at  a  place  called  Rockcitisus,  about  forty  miles  from 
 Mr  Braincrd's  lodgings. 
 
 Weunefday, 
 
Mt-ij.      Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  129 
 
 Wednefday,  0£lober  3.  We  went  on  our  way  into  the 
 wildernefs,  and  found  the  moft  difficult  and  dangerous  travel- 
 ling, by  fai",  that  ever  any  of  us  had  feen;  we  had  fcarce  any 
 thing  eiie  but  lorty  mountains;  deep  valleys,  and  hideous  rocks, 
 to  make  our  way  through.  However,  1  felt  fome  fweetnefs 
 in  divine  things,  part  of  the  day,  and  had  my  mind  intensely 
 engaged  in  meditation  on  a  divine  lubjecl.  Near  night,  my 
 beaft  that  I  rode  upon,  hung  one  of  her  legs  in  the  rocks, 
 and  fell  down  under  me;  but  through  divine  goodnefs,  I  was 
 not  hurt.  However,  fhe  broke  her  leg ;  and  being  in  ilich  a 
 hideous  place,  and  near  thii  ty  miles  from  any  houfe,  1  faw 
 nothing  that  could  be  done  to  prefer  ve  l?er  life,  and  fo  was 
 obliged  to  kill  her^  and  to  profecute  my  journey  on  toot.  This 
 accident  made  me  adu:ire  the  divine  goodnefs  to  me,  that  my 
 b>:>nes  were  not  broken,  and  the  multitude  of  them  filled  with 
 ftr  >ng  pain.  Juft  at  dark,  we  kindled  a  fire,  cut  up  a  few 
 bulhes,  and  made  a  Ihelter  over  our  heads,  to  fave  us  frorq. 
 the  froft,  which  was  very  hard  that  night ;  and  committing 
 ourfelves  to  God  by  prayer,  we  lay  down  on  the  ground,  and 
 flept  quietly. 
 
 [The  next  day,  they  went  forward  on  their  journey, 
 and  at  night  took  up  their  lodging  in  the  woods  in  like  manr 
 ner.] 
 
 Friday,  October  5.  We  arrived  at  Sufquahannah  river,  at  a 
 pbce  called  Opeholhaupung  *:  found  there  twelve  Indian 
 houfes:  after  1  had  faluted  the  king  in  a  friendly  manner,  X 
 told  him  my  btifinefs,  and  that  my  delire  was  to  teach  them 
 Chnjl'ianny.  After  fome  confultation,  the  Indians  gathered, 
 and  I  preached  to  them.  And  when  I  had  done>  I  aficed,  if 
 they  would  hear  me  again.  They  replied,  that  they  would 
 confider  of  it ;  and  foon  after  fent  me  word,  that  they  would 
 immediately  attend,  if  I  would  preach  :  which  I  did,  with 
 freedom,  both  times.  When  I  alked  them  again,  whether 
 they  would  hear  me  further,  they  replied,  they  would  the  next 
 day.  I  was  exceeding  fenfible  of  the  impoflibility  of  doing 
 any  thing  for  the  poor  Heathen  without  fpecial  affiftancc 
 from  above:  and  my  foul  feemcd  to  reft  on  God,  and  leave  it 
 to  him  to  do  as  he  pleafed  in  that  which  I  favv'  was  his  cvvii 
 caufe :  and  indeed,  through  divine  goodnefs,  I  had  felt  fomc- 
 
 *  See  his  narrative  at  the  end  of  his  ordination  ferraon,  pag.  3  j. 
 36: 
 
 R  tluns 
 
ip  THE     LIFE     OP  yf.  Z>.  1744^ 
 
 thing  of  this  frame  moft  of  the  time  while  I  was  travelling 
 thither ;  and  in  feme  meafure  before  I  fet  out. 
 
 Saturday,  Oflober  6.  Rofe  early,  and  befought  the  Lord 
 for  help  in  my  great  work.  Near  noon,  preached  again  to 
 the  Indians  :  and  in  the  afternoon,  vifited  them  from  houfe  to 
 houfe,  and  invited  them  to  come  and  hear  me  again  the  next 
 oay,  and  put  oft' their  hunting  defign,  which  they  were  juft 
 entering  upon,  till  Monday.  "  This  night,"  I  truft,  "  the 
 **  Lord  flood  by  me/'  to  encourage  and  ftrengthen  my  foul : 
 I  fpent  more  than  an  hour  in  fecret  retirement  j  was  enabled 
 to  "  pour  out  my  heart  before  God,"  for  the  increafe  of 
 grace  in  my  foul,  for  minifterial  endowments,  for  fuccefs 
 among  the  poor  Indians,  for  God's  minifters  and  people,  and 
 far  dear  friend's  vaftly  diftant,  <bc.     BIcfTed  be  God ! 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  complains  of  great  want  of  fixcdnefs  and 
 intenfenefs  in  religion,  fo  that  he  could  not  keep  any  fpiritual 
 thought  one  minute  without  diftraftion  ;  which  occafioncd 
 anguifh  of  fplrit.  He  felt  (he  fays)  amazingly  guilty,  and  ex- 
 iremely  jmferable ;  and  cries  out,  "  Oh  my  loul,  what  death. 
 "  it  is,  to  have  the  affeflions  unable  to  centre  in  God,  by  rea- 
 "  fon  of  daiknefs,  and  confequently  roving  after  that  fatif- 
 *'  fadtion  elfewhere,  that  is  only  to  be  found  here !"  How- 
 ever, he  preached  twice  to  the  Indians  with  fome  freedom 
 and  power  ;  but  was  afterwards  damped  by  the  obje^ions  they 
 made  againfl  Chriffianity.  In  the  evening,  in  a  fcnfe  of  his 
 great  defeats  in  preaching,  he  "  intreated  God  not  to  impute 
 **  to  him  blood-guiltinefs;"  but  yet  was  at  the  fame  time  en- 
 abled to  rejoice  in  God.'} 
 
 Monday,  October  8.  Vifited  the  Indians  with  a  defign  to 
 take  my  leave  of  them,  fuppofing  they  would  this  morning  go 
 out  to  hunting  early ;  but  beyond  my  expeftation  and  hope, 
 they  dcfired  to  he?.r  me  preach  again.  I  gladly  complied  with 
 their  requefl,  and  afterwards  endeavoured  to  anfwer  their  ob- 
 je^i'jns  againfl  Chriftianity.  Then  they  went  away ;  and 
 we  fpent  the  refl  of  the  afternoon  in  reading  and  prayer,  in- 
 tending to  go  home-ward  very  early  the  next  day.  IVly  foul 
 was  in  fome  meafure  refrefhed  in  fecret  prayer  and  meditation.- 
 BlefTed  be  the  Lord  for  all  his  goodnefs. 
 
 Tuefday,  0(51:ober  9.  We  rofe  about  four  in  the  morning, 
 and  commending  ourfelves  to  God  by  prayer,  and  alklng  his 
 fpecial  protection,  wc  fet  out  on  our  journey  homewards 
 about  five,  and  travelled  with  great  fleadinefs  till  part  fix  at 
 night.     And  then  made  us  a  fire,  and  a  fhelter  of  barks,  and 
 
 f# 
 
iEf.  27-      Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  131 
 
 fo  refted.     I  had  fome  clear  and  comfortable  thoughts  on  3 
 
 olivine   fiibjefl-,  by  the  way,  towards  night. ^In  the  night, 
 
 the  wolves  howled  around  us  ;  but  God  preferved  us. 
 
 [The  next  day,  they  rofe  early,  and  fet  forward,  and  tra- 
 velled that  day,  till  they  came  to  an  Iri/h  fettlement,  wliere 
 Mr  Brainerd  was  acquainted,  and  lodged  there.  He  fpeaks  of 
 fome  fweetncfs  in  divine  things,  and  thankfulnefs  to  God  for 
 iiis  goodnefs  to  him  in  this  journey,  that  he  felt  in  his  heart 
 in  the  evening,  though  attended  with  fhame  for  his  barrennefs. 
 On  Thurfday,  he  continued  in  the  fame  place ;  and  he  and 
 Mr  Byram  preached  there  to  the  people.] 
 
 Friday,  Oftober  12.  Rode  home  to  my  lodging;  where  I 
 poured  out  my  foul  to  God  in  fecret  prayer,  and  endeavour- 
 ed to  blefs  him  for  his  abundant  goodnefs  to  me  in  my  late 
 journey.  I  fcarce  ever  enjoyed  more  health,  at  leaft,  of  later 
 years;  and  God  marvelloufiy,  and  almoft  m^raculoufly,  fup- 
 ported  me  under  the  fatigues  of  the  way,  and  travelfing  ©n 
 foot.  Blefled  be  the  Lord,  that  continually  preferves  me  in  all 
 my  ways. 
 
 [On  Saturday,  he  went  again  to  the  Irifh  fettlement,  to 
 fpend  the  Sabbath  there,  his  Indians  being  gone.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  Odlober  14.  "Was  much  confufed  and  perplex- 
 ed in  my  thoughts ;  could  not  pray ;  and  was  almoft  difcou- 
 raged,  thinking  I  fhould  never  be  able  to  preach  any  more. 
 But  afterwards,  God  was  pleafed  to  give  mc  fome  relief  from 
 thefe  confufions :  but  ftill  I  was  afraid,  and  even  trembled  be- 
 fore God.  I  went  to  the  place  of  public  worfhip,  lifting  up 
 my  heart  to  God  for  afliftance  and  grace,  in  my  great  work : 
 and  God  was  gracious  to  me,  and  helped  me  to  plead  with  him 
 for  holinefs,  and  to  ufe  the  ftrongcft  arguments  with  him,, 
 drawn  from  the  incarnation  and  fuiferings  of  Chrift  for  this 
 very  end,  that  men  might  be  made  holy.  Afterwards,  I  was 
 much  afliftcd  in  preaching.  I  know  not  that  ever  God  help- 
 ed me  to  preach  in  a  more  clofe  and  diftinguifhing  manner  for 
 the  trial  of  mens  ftate.  Through  the  infinite  goodnefs  of 
 God,  I  felt  what  I  fpake ;  and  God  enabled  me  to  treat  on 
 divine  truth  with  uncommon  clearnefs :  and  yet  I  was  fo  fen- 
 fible  of  my  defefls  in  preaching,  that  I  could  not  be  proud  of 
 my  performance,  as  at  fome  times ;  and  blelTed  be  the  Lord 
 for  this  mercy.  In  the  evening,  I  longed  to  be  entirely  alone, 
 to  blefs  God  for  help  in  a  time  of  extremity ;  and  longed  for 
 
 R  2  great 
 
13a  T  H  E     L  I  F  E    O  F  J.  D.  1744. 
 
 great  degrees  of  holincfs,  that  I  might  fhew  my  gratitude  tQ 
 God. 
 
 [The  next  morning,  he  fpent  fome  time  before  fun-rife 
 in  prayer,  in  the  fame  fweet  and  grateful  frame  of  mind, 
 that  be  had  been  in  the  evening  before  :  and  afterwards  went 
 to  his  Indians,  and  fpent  fome  time  in  teaching  and  cxhortmg 
 them.] 
 
 Tucfday,  Oflobcr  16.  Felt  a  fpirit  of  folemnity  and  watch- 
 fulnefs  ;  was  afraid  I  fl:iould  not  live  to  and  upon  God:  long-* 
 ed  for  more  intenfenefs  and  fpirituality.  Spent  the  da)  m 
 writing;  frequently  lifting  up  my  heair  to  God  tor  mere  hea? 
 "vcnlv-iTjindcdnefs.  In  the  evening,  enjoyed  fweet  afliflance 
 in  prr.yer,  and  thirftcd  and  pleaded  to  be  as  holy  as  the  bleded 
 cngcls :  longed  for  miniflerial  gifts  and  graces,  and  fuccels  in 
 my  work:  was  fweetly  aflifted  in  the  duty  of  inttrcefTion, 
 and  enabled  to  remember  and  plead  for  numbers  ot  dear 
 friends,  and  Chrift's  mim{l;ers. 
 
 [He  feemed  to  have  much  of  the  fame  frame  of  mind,  the 
 two  next  days.] 
 
 Friday,  Odlober  19.  Felt  an  abaflng  fenfe  of  my  own  impu- 
 rity and  unholinefs  ;  and  felt  my  foul  melt  and  mourn,  that 
 I  had  abuftd  and  grieved  a  very  gracious.  God,  who  was  ftill 
 kind  to  me,  notwithftanding  all  my  unworthinefs.  ^iy  foul 
 enjoyed  a  fweet  fcafon  of  bitter  repentance  and  forrow,  that 
 1  had  wronged  that  bleffed  God,  who  (I  was  perfuaded)  was 
 reconciled  to  me  in  his  dear  Son.  A.y  foul  was  now  tender^ 
 devout,  and  folcmn.  And  I  w-as  afraid  of  nothing,  but  fin  > 
 and  afrr.id  of  that  in  every  aftion  and  thought. 
 
 [The  four  next  days,^  •were  manifeflly  fpent  in  a  mcft  con- 
 flant  tendernefs,  watchfulnef?,  diligence,  and  felf-diffidcnce. 
 But  he  complains  of  wanderings  of  mind,  languor  ot  affec- 
 tions, (be."] 
 
 ,  Wednefday,  Oftober  24.  Near  noon,  rode  to  my  people  ; 
 fpent  fome  time,  and  prayed  with  them  :  felt  the  frame  of  a 
 pilgrim  on  earth  ;  longed  much  to  leave  this  gloomy  manlion; 
 but  yet  found  the  cxcrcife  of  patience  and  refignt'tion.  And 
 as  I  returned  home  from  the  Indians,  fpent  the  whole  time  in 
 lifting  up  my  heart  to  God.  In  the  evening,  enjoyed  a  bleff- 
 ed feafon  alone  in  prayer ;  \\'as  enabled  to  cry  to  God  w  ith  a 
 
 ^hild-Uke 
 
yE/.  27-       M  R    D  A  V  I  D     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  ijj 
 
 child-like  fpirit,  for  the  fpace  of  near  an  hour :  enjoyed  a 
 fweet  freedom  in  fupplicating  for  myfclf,  for  dear  friends, 
 miniflers,  and  fome  who  are  preparing  for  that  work,  and 
 for  the  church  of  God ;  and  longed  to  be  as  lively  myfelf  in 
 God's  fervice  as  the  angels. 
 
 Thurfday,  Oflober  25.  Was  bufy  in  writing.  Was  very 
 fcnfible  of  my  abfolute  dependence  on  God  in  al  refpefts  ; 
 faw  that  I  could  do  nothing  in  thofe  affairs,  that  1  have  fuf- 
 ficient  natural  faculties  for,  unlefs  God  fhould  fmile  upoa 
 my  attempt.  "  Not  that  wc  are  fufficient  of  ourfelves,  to 
 ^'  think  any  thing,  as  of  ourfelves,"  was  a  facred  text  that  I 
 faw  the  truth  of. 
 
 Friday,  October  26.  In  the  morning,  my  foul  was  melted 
 with  a  fenfe  of  divine  goodnefj  and  mercy  to  fuch  a  vile  un- 
 worthy worm  as  1 :  delighted  to  lean  upon  God,  and  place 
 my  whole  trufl  in  him :  my  foul  was  exceedingly  grieved  for 
 fin,  and  prized  and  longed  after  holinefs;  it  wounded  my 
 heart  deeply,  yet  fweetly,  to  think  how  I  had  abuied  a  kind 
 God.  I  longed  to  be  perfectly  holy,  that  I  might  not  grieve 
 a  gracious  God ;  who  will  continue  to  love,  notwithllanding 
 his  love  is  abufed !  I  longed  for  holinefs  more  for  this  end, 
 than  I  did  for  my  own  happinefs  fake  :  and  yet  this  was  my 
 greateft  happinefs,  never  more  to  difhonour,  but  always  to 
 glorify  the  blelTed  God.  Afterwards,  rode  up  to  the  Indians, 
 in  the  afternoon,  6c. 
 
 [The  four  next  days,  he  was  exercifed  with  much  difordcr 
 and  pain  of  body,  with  a  degree  of  melancholy  and  gloominefs 
 of  mind,  bitterly  complaining  of  deadncfs  and  unprofitable- 
 nefs,  yet  mourning  and  longing  after  God.] 
 
 Wednefday,  Oftober  31.  Was  fenfible  of  my  barrennefF^ 
 and  decays  in  the  things  of  God :  my  foul  failed  when  I  re- 
 membered the  fervency  I  had  enjoyed  at  the  throne  of  grace. 
 Oh  (I  thought)  if  I  could  but  be  fpiritual,  warm,  heavenly- 
 minded,  and  atfedionately  breathing  after  God,  this  would 
 be  better  than  life  to  me !  My  foul  longed  exceedingly  tor 
 death,  to  be  lojfed  from  this  dulnefs  and  barrennefs,  and 
 made  for  ever  aclive  in  the  fervice  of  God.  I  feemed  to  live 
 for  nothing,  and  to  do  no  good :  and  Oh,  the  burden  of  fuch 
 a  life!  Oh,  death,  death,  m.y  kind  friend,  haften  and  deliver 
 me  from  dull  mortality,  and  make  me  fpiritual  and  vigorous 
 to  eternity ! 
 
 Thurfday,  November  i.  Had  but  little  fwectnefs  in  divine 
 things.     But  afterwards,  in  the  evening,  felt  fome  life,  and 
 
 longings 
 
434  T  H  E    L  I  r  E     O  F  J.  D.  1744. 
 
 longings  after  God  ;  I  longed  to  be  always  folemn,  devout^ 
 and  heavenly-minded  ;  and  was  afraid  to  leave  off  praying, 
 left  I   /hould  again  lofe  a  fenfe  of  the  fweet  things  of  God. 
 
 Friday,  November  2.  Was  filled  with  forrow  and  confufion., 
 3n  the  morning,  and  could  enjoy  no  fweet  fcnfc  of  divine 
 things,  nor  get  any  relief  in  prayer.  Saw  I  deferved,  that 
 every  one  of  God's  creatures  fhould  be  let  loofe  upon  me  to 
 be  the  executioners  of  his  wrath  againft  me :  and  yet  there- 
 in 1  faw  I  deferved  what  1  did  not  fear  as  my  portion.  About 
 noon,  rode  up  to  the  Indians  ;  and  while  going,  could  feel  no 
 defires  for  them,  and  €ven  dreaded  to  fay  any  thing  to  them ; 
 but  God  was  pleafed  to  give  me  fome  freedom  and  enlarge- 
 ment, and  made  the  feafon  comfortable  to  me.  Tn  the  even- 
 ing, had  enlargement  in  prayer.  But,  alas!  what  comforts 
 and  enlargements  I  have  felt  for  thefe  many  weeks  paft,  have 
 been  only  tranfent  and  fhort;  and  the  greater  part  of  my 
 time  has  been  filled  up  with  deadncfs,  or  ftruggles  with  dead- 
 nefs,  and  bitter  conflifts  with  corruption.  I  have  found 
 myfelf  exercifcd  forely  with  fome  particular  things  that  I 
 thought  myfelf  moft  of  all  freed  from.  And  thus  I  have  ever 
 found  it,  when  I  have  thought  the  battle  was  over,  and  the 
 conqueft  gained,  and  fo  let  down  my  watch,  the  enemy  has 
 rifen  up  and  done  me  the  greateft  injury. 
 
 Saturday,  November  3.  I  read  the  life  and  trials  of  a  god- 
 ly man,  and  was  much  warmed  by  it :  I  wondered  at  my  paft 
 deadnefs  ;  and  was  more  convinced  of  it  than  ever.  Was  en- 
 abled to  confefs  and  bewail  my  fin  before  God,  with  felf-ab- 
 horr-v^ncc. 
 
 Lord's  day,  November  4.-.  Had,  I  think,  fome  exercife  of 
 faith  in  prayer,  in  the  morning :  longed  to  be  fpiritual.  Had 
 confiderable  help  in  preaching  to  my  poor  Indians :  was  en- 
 couraged with  them,  and  hoped  that  God  defigned  mercy  for 
 them. 
 
 [The  next  day  *,  he  (et  out  on  a  journey  to  New- York, 
 to  the  meeting  of  the  Prclbytery  there;  and  was  gone  from 
 home  more  than  a  fortnight.  He  feemed  to  enter  on  this 
 journey  with  great  reluctance;  fearing,  that  the  diverfions  of 
 it  would  prove  a  means  of  cooling  his  religious  affections,  as 
 he  had  found  in  other  journeys.  But  yet,  in  this  journey  he 
 h  id  fome  fpecia!  feafjns  wherein  he  enjoyed  extraordinary  e- 
 videnccs    and   fruits   of  God's  gracious   prefence.     He  was 
 
 *  On  thi?  d;iv  he  concluded  his  Narrative,  that  is  at  the  end  of 
 kis  oruination-iermon. 
 
 greatly 
 
>E/.  27-       Mr    DAVID     BRAINERD.  J35 
 
 greatly  fatigued  and  expofed  in  this  journey  by  cold  and 
 ilorms  :  and  when  he  returned  from  New- York  to  New-jcr- 
 fcy,  on  Friday,  was  taken  very  ill,  and  was  detained  by  his 
 ilincfs  fome  time.] 
 
 "Wcdnefday,  November  21.  Rode  from  Newark  to  Rockciti- 
 «us  in  the  cold,  and  was  almoft  overcome  with  it.  Enjoyed 
 fome  fwectnefs  in  converfation  wich  dear  Mr  Jones,  while  I 
 dined  with  him :  my  foul  loves  the  people  of  God,  and  efpe- 
 cially  the  minifters  of  Jefus  Chrifl,  who  feel  the  fame  trials 
 that  I  do. 
 
 Thurfday,  November  I2.  Came  on  my  way  from  Rockciti- 
 cus  to  Delaware  river.  W  as  very  much  difordered  with  a  cold  and 
 pain  in  my  head.  About  fix  at  night,  I  loft  my  way  in  the 
 wildernefs,  and  wandered  over  rocks  and  mountains,  down 
 hideous  fteeps,  through  fwamps,  and  moft  dreadful  and  dan- 
 gerous places;  and  ihe  night  being  dark,  fo  that  few  ftars 
 eould  be  feen,  I  was  greatly  expofed :  was  much  pinched 
 with  cold,  and  diftreffed  with  an  extreme  pain  in  my  head, 
 attended  with  licknefs  at  my  ftomach ;  fo  that  every  ftep 
 I  took  \yas  diftreffing  to  me.  I  had  little  hope  for  (cvc 
 ral  hours  together,  but  that  I  muft  lie  out  in  the  woods  all 
 night,  in  this  diftrelTcd  cafe.  But  about  nine  o'clock,  I  found 
 a  houfe,  through  the  abundant  goodnefs  of  God,  an  d  was 
 kindly  entertained.  Thus  I  have  frequently  been  expofed, 
 and  fometimes  lain  out  the  whole  night:  but  God  has  hither- 
 to preferred  me ;  and  blefled  be  his  name.  Such  fatigues  and 
 hard/hips  as  thefe  ferve  to  wean  me  more  from  the  earth  ;  and, 
 I  truft,  will  make  heaven  the  fweeter.  Formerly,  when  I 
 ■was  thus  expofed  to  cold,  rain,  ^c.  I  was  ready  to  pleafe  my«- 
 felf  with  the  thoughts  of  enjoying  a  comfortable  houfe,  a 
 warm  fire,  and  other  outward  comforts ;  but  now  thefe  have 
 lefs  place  in  my  heart,  (through  the  grace  of  God),  and  my 
 eye  is  more  to  God  for  comfort.  In  this  world  I  expedl  tri- 
 bulation ;  and  it  does  not  now,  as  formerly,  appear  Itrangc 
 to  me ;  I  do  not  in  fuch  feafons  of  difficulty  flatter  myfelf 
 that  it  will  be  better  hereafter;  but  rather  think,  hov/  much 
 worfe  it  might  be;  how  much  greater  trials  others  of  God's 
 ^ildren  have  endured ;  and  how  much  greater  are  yet  perhaps 
 referved  for  me.  Bleffed  be  God,  that  he  makes  the  thoughts 
 of  my  journey's  end  and  of  my  difTolution  a  great  comfort  to 
 me,  under  my  fliarpeft  trials ;  and  fcarce  ever  lets  thefe  thoughts 
 be  attended  with  terror  or  melancholy ;  but  they  are  attend* 
 *d  frequently  with  great  joy. 
 
 Friday,  Nov«raber  23.  Vifited  ;*  |ick  man;  difcourfed  and 
 
 prayed 
 
136  T  M  E     L  I  r  E     O  r  A.  D.  1744, 
 
 prayed  with  him.  Then  vifited  another  houfe,  where  was 
 one  dead  and  laid  out ;  looked  on  the  corpfe,  and  longed  that 
 my  time  mignt  come  to  depart,  that  1  might  be  vjith  Ck  ^jl. 
 Then  went  home  to  my  lodgmgs,  about  one  o'clock.  Felt 
 poorly  ;  but  was  able  to  read,  moll  of"  the  alternoon. 
 
 [Within  the  fpace  of  the  next  twelve  days,  he  palTed  undef 
 many  changes  in  the  frames  and  exercifes  of  his  mind.  He 
 had  many  leafons  of  the  fpccial  influences  of  God's  Spirit, 
 animating,  invigorating,  and  comforting  him  in  the  ways  of 
 God  and  duties  of  religion :  but  had  Ibme  turns  of  great  de«- 
 je(^ion  and  melancholy.  He  Ipent  much  time,  within  this 
 fpace,  in  hard  labour,  with  others,  to  make  for  himfelf  a  little 
 cottage  or  hut^  to  live  in  by  himfelf  through  the  winter.  Yet 
 he  frequently  preached  to  the  Indians,  and  fpeaks  of  fpccial 
 aiiiftance  he  had  from  time  to  time,  in  addreffing  himfelf  to 
 them  ;  and  of  his.  f  >metimes  having  confiderable  encourage- 
 ment, from  the  attention  they  gave.  But  on  Tuefday,  De- 
 cember 4.  he  was  funk  into  great  difcouragement,  to  fee 
 them  (moll  of  them)  gomg  in  Company  to  an  idolatrous /<r«y? 
 ani  dance y  after  he  had  taken  abundant  pains  with  them  to 
 iiauade  them  from  thefe  things.] 
 
 Thurfday,  December  6.  Having  now  a  happy  opportunity 
 •f  being  retired  in  a  houfe  of  my  own,  which  I  have  lately 
 procured  and  maved  into,  and  confidering  that  it  is  now  a 
 long  time  fince  I  have  been  able,  either  on  account  of  bodily 
 •weaknefs,  or  for  want  of  retirement,  or  fome  other  difficulty 
 to  fpcnd  any  time  in  fecret  faffing  and  prayer  ;  confidering 
 alfo  the  greatnefs  of  my  work,  and  the  extreme  difficulties  that 
 attend  it ;  and  that  my  poor  Indians  are  now  xvoT/hippitig  de» 
 vils,  notwithftanding  all  the  pains  I  have  taken  with  them, 
 which  almoff  overwhelms  my  fpirit ;  moreover,  confidering 
 my  extreme  barrenncfs,  fpiritual  deadnefs  and  dejeftion,  of 
 late ;  as  alfo  the  power  of  fome  particular  corruptions ;  I  fet 
 apart  this  day  for  fecret  prayer  and  faffing,  to  implore  the 
 blefling  of  God  on  myfelf,  on  my  poor  people,  on  my  friends, 
 and  on  the  church  of  God.  At  firff,  I  felt  a  great  backward- 
 nefs  to  the  duties  of  the  day,  on  account  of  the  feeming  im- 
 pofllbility  of  performing  them ;  but  the  Lord  helped  me 
 to  break  through  this  difficulty.  God  was  ple'afed,  by  the 
 ufe  of  means,  to  give  me  fome  clear  convidrion  of  my  fm- 
 fulncfs,  and  a  difcovery  of  the  plague  of  my  oivn  heart,  more 
 afFcfting  than  what  I  have  of  late  had.  And  efpecially  I  fa^^ 
 wy  finfulncfs  in  this,  that  when  God  had  ivithdraivn  himfelf, 
 
 then, 
 
JEM7-     Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  137 
 
 then,  inftead  of  living  and  dying  in  purjuit  of  him,  I  have  been 
 difpofed  to  one  of  thefe  two  things,  either  {fiyji)  to  yield  an 
 unbecoming  relpe£l  to  fome  earthly  objects,  as  if  happinefs 
 were  to  be  derived  from  them  ;  or  {fecondly)  to  be  lecretly 
 froward  a.nd  impatient,  and  unfiiitably  defirous  of  death,  fo 
 that  I  have  fometimes  thought  I  could  not  bear  to  think  my 
 3ife  muft  be  lengthened  out.  And  that  which  often  drove  me 
 to  thii  impatient  defne  of  death,  was  a  defpair  of  doing  any 
 good  in  life;  and  I  chofe  death,  rather  than  a  life  fpeiit  for 
 nothing.  But  now  God  made  me  fenfible  of  my  fm  in  thefc 
 things,  and  enabled  me  to  cry  to  him  for  forgivenefs.  Yet 
 this  was  njt  all  I  wanted  ;  for  my  foul  appeared  exceedingly 
 polluted,  my  heart  leeraed  like  a  ncft  of  vipers,  or  a  cage  cf 
 unclean  and  hateful  birds :  and  therefore  I  wanted  to  be  pu- 
 rifi:;d  "  by  t'le  blood  of  fpiinkling,  that  cleanfeth  from  all 
 ^'  fin."  And  this,  I  hope,  I  was  enabled  to  pray  for  in  faith. 
 I  enjoyed  much  more  intcnlenefs,  fervency,  and  fpirituality, 
 than  I  expefted  ;  God  was  better  to  me  than  my  fears.  And 
 towards  night,  I  felt  my  foul  rejoice,  that  God  is  unchangC' 
 ably  happy  and  glorious ;  that  he  will  be  glorified,  whatever 
 becomes  of  his  creatures.  I  was  enabled  to  perfevere  in  prayer 
 till  fometime  in  the  evening:  at  which  time  I  faw  fomuch  need 
 of  divine  help,  in  every  r^fped,  that  I  knew  not  how  to  leave 
 off,  and  had  forgot  that  I  needed  food.  This  evening,  I  was 
 much  afTifled  in  meditating  on  If.  lii.  3.  Bleffcd  be  the  Lord 
 for  any  help  in  the  part  day. 
 
 Friday,  December  7.  Spent  fome  time  in  prayer,  in  the 
 morning ;  enjoyed  fome  freedom  and  affeftion  in  the  duty, 
 and  had  longing  defires  of  being  made  "  faithful  to  the  death." 
 Spent  a  little  time  in  writing  on  a  divine  fubject :  then  vifited 
 the  Indians,  and  preached  to  them.  But  under  inexpreilible 
 dejedlion :  I  had  no  heart  to  fpeak  to  them,  and  could  not  do 
 it,  but  as  I  forced  myfelf :  I  knew,  they  muft  hate  to  hear 
 me,  as  having  but  jufl:  got  home  from  their  idolatrous  feafb 
 and  devil-worfhip. — In  the  evening,  had  fome  freedom  in 
 prayer  and  meditation. 
 
 Saturday,  December  8.  Have  been  uncommonly  free  this 
 day  from  dejeftion,  and  from  that  diftrefTrng  apprehenfion, 
 that  I  could  do  nothing :  was  enabled  to  pray  and  ftudy  with 
 fome  comfort ;  and  efpecially  was  alliiled  in  writing  on  a  di- 
 vine fubicft.  In  the  evening,  my  foul  rejoiced  in  God  ;  and 
 I  bleffed  his  name  for  fhining  on  my  foul.  O  the  fwect  and 
 bleffed  change  I  then  felt,  when  God  *'  brought  me  out  of 
 "  darkncfs  into  his  marvellous  light !" 
 
 •Lord's  day,  Deceir.ber  9.  Preached,  both  parts  ©f  the  day, 
 
 S  a£ 
 
138  THELIPEOF  y^.Z}.i744, 
 
 at  a  place  called  Greenwich,  in  New-Jerfej',  about  ten  miles 
 from  my  own  houfe.  In  the  firfl:  difcourfe  I  bad  fcarce  any 
 warmth  or  affjctionate  longing  for  fouls.  In  the  intermiflion- 
 feafon  I  got  alone  among  the  bufhes,  and  cried  to  God  for  par- 
 don of  my  deadnefs ;  and  was  in  anguiili  and  bitterncfs;  that 
 I  could  not  addiefs  fouls  with  more  ccmpalT.on  and  tender 
 affeclion  :  judged  and  condemned  myfelf  for  want  of  this  di- 
 vine temper;  though  I  faw  I  could  not  get  it  as  of  myfelf, 
 any  more  than  I  could  make  a  world.  In  the  latter  exercife, 
 blelfed  be  the  Lord,  I  had  fome  fervency,  both  in  prayer  and 
 preaching;  and  efpccially  in  the  application  of  my  difcourfe 
 was  enabled  to  addrefs  precious  fouls  wdth  afFeftion,  concern, 
 tendernefs,  and  importunity.  The  Spirit  of  God,  I  think, 
 was  there  ;  as  the  effefts  were  apparent,  tears  running  down 
 many  cheeks. 
 
 Monday,  December  10.  Near  noon,  I  preached  again  :  God 
 gave  me  fome  affiflance,  and  enabled  me  to  be  in  fome  degree 
 faithful ;  fo  that  I  had  peace  in  ray  own  foul,  and  a  very  com- 
 fortable compofure,  '•'  although  Ifrael  fhould  not  be  gathered." 
 Came  away  from  Greenwich,  and  rode  home ;  arrived  juft  in' 
 the  evening.  By  the  way,  my  foul  blelTed  God  for  his  good- 
 nefs ;  and  I  rejoiced,  that  fo  much  of  my  work  was  done,  and 
 I  fo  much  nearer  my  bleffed  reward.  Blelfed  be  God  for  grace 
 to  be  faithful. 
 
 Tuefday,  December  ii.  Felt  very  poorly  in  body,  being 
 much  tired  and  worn  out  the  laft  night.  Was  affifted  in  fome 
 meafure  in  writing  on  a  divine  fubjcdt :  but  was  fo  feeble  and 
 fore  in  my  breaft,  that  I  had  not  much  refolution  in  my 
 work.  Oh,  how  I  long  for  that  world  "  where  the  weary" 
 "  are  at  reft!"  and  yet  through  the  goodnefs  of  God  I  do  not 
 now  feel  impatient. 
 
 Wedncfday,  December  12.  Was  again  very  weak;  but 
 fomewhat  alTifted  in  fecret  prayer,  and  enabled  with  pleafure 
 and  fweetnefs  to  cry,  "Come,  Lord  Jefus'  come.  Lord  Jefus  ? 
 *'  come  quickly."  My  foul  -''  longed  for  God,  for  the  living 
 "  God."  O  how  delightful  it  is,  to  pray  under  fuch  fweet 
 influences!  Oh  how  much  better  is  this,  than  one's  neceffary 
 food!  I  had  at  this  time  no  difpofition  to  eat,  (though  late  in 
 the  morning) ;  for  earthly  food  appeared  wholly  taftelefs. 
 O  how  much  "better  is  thy  love  than  wine,"  than  the  fwect- 
 eft  wine! — I  vifited  and  preached  to  the  Indians,  in  the  after- 
 noon ;  but  under  much  deje<f!:ion.  Found  my  interpreter  un- 
 der fome  concern  for  his  foul ;  which  was  fome  comfort  to 
 rne ;  and  3'et  filled  mc  with  new  care.  I  longed  greatly  for 
 his  converfion ;  lifted  up  my  heart  to  Gcd  for  it^  while  I  was 
 
 taJkrn^ 
 
Mi.  27'     Mr     D  a  V  I  D     B  R  a  I  N  E  R  D.  139 
 
 talking  to  him :  came  home,  and  poured  out  my  foul  to  God 
 for  him  :  enjoyed  fome  freedom  in  prayer,  and  was  enabled, 
 i  think,  to  leave  all  with  God. 
 
 Thurfday,  December  13.  Endeavoured  to  (pend  the  day 
 in  fafting  and  prayer,  to  implore  the  divine  bleffing,  more  e- 
 Ipecially  on  my  poor  people ;  and  in  particular,  I  fought  for 
 converting  grace  for  my  interpreter,  and  three  or  four  more 
 under  fome  concern  for  their  fouls.  I  was  much  difordered 
 in  the  morning  when  I  arofe;  but  having  determined  to  fpend 
 .the  day  in  this  manner,  I  attempted  it.  Some  freedom  I 
 had  in  pleading  for  thefe  poor  concerned  fouls,  feveral  times; 
 and  when  interceding  for  them,  I  enjoyed  greater  freedom 
 from  wandering  and  diftrafting  thoughts,  than  in  any  part  of 
 my  fupplications :  but,  in  the  general,  was  greatly  exercifed 
 with  wanderings ;  fo  tkat  in  the  evening  it  feeracd  as  if  I  had 
 need  to  pray  for  nothing  fo  much  as  for  the  pardon  of  fms 
 committed  in  the  day  pafl,  and  the  vilenefs  I  then  found  in 
 myfelf.  The  fins  I  had  moft  fenfe  of,  were  pride,  and  wan- 
 dering thoughts,  whereby  I  mocked  God.  The  former  of 
 thefe  curfed  iniquities  excited  me  to  think  of  writing,  or  preach- 
 ing, or  converting  Heathen,  or  performing  fome  other  great 
 work,  that  my  name  might  live  when  I  fhould  be  dead.  My  foul 
 was  in  anguifh,  and  ready  to  drop  into  defpair,  to  find  fo 
 much  of  that  curfed  temper.  With  this,  and  the  other  evil  I 
 laboured  under,  viz.  wandering  thoughts,  I  was  almoft 
 overwhelmed,  and  even  ready  to  give  over  ftriving  after  a  fpi- 
 rit  of  devotion  ;  and  oftentimes  funk  into  a  confiderable  de- 
 gree of  defpondency,  and  thought  I  was  "  more  brutifh  than 
 ■"  any  man."  Yet  after  all  my  forrows,  I  truft,  through  grace, 
 this  day  and  the  exercifes  of  it  have  been  for  my  good,  and 
 taught  mc  more  of  my  corruption,  and  weaknefs  without 
 Chrifl,  than  I  knew  before, 
 
 Friday,  December  14.  Near  noon,  went  to  the  Indians  ; 
 but  knew  not  what  to  fay  to  them,  and  was  nfharaed  to  look 
 them  in  the  face  :  I  felt  I  had  no  power  to  addrefs  their  con- 
 fciences,  and  therefore  had  no  boldnefs  to  fay  any  thing. 
 Was,  much  of  the  day,  in  a  great  degree  of  defpair  about 
 ever  "doing  or  feeing  any  good  in  the  land  of  the  living." 
 
 [He  continued  under  the  fame  dejeftion  the  next  day.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  December  16.  Was  fo  overwhelmed  with  de- 
 jedtion,  that  I  knew  not  how  to  live  :  I  longed  for  death  ex- 
 ceedingly :  my  foul  wasyJmA'  into  dsep  waters,  and  the  floods 
 were  ready  to  dmvn  me:  I  was  fo  much  oppreffcd,  that  my 
 
 S  a  foul 
 
J4«  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F  ^D.  1744. 
 
 foul  was  in  a  kind  of  horror  :  I  could  not  keep  my  thought* 
 fixed  in  prayer,  for  the  fpace  of  one  minute,  withe  ut  flutter- 
 ing and  dillraclion  :  I  was  exceedingly  afnamed,  that  1  did 
 not  live  to  God :  I  had  no  diflrefling  doubt  abmt  my  own 
 flatc ;  but  would  have  cheerfully  ventured  (as  far  as  1  could 
 poffibly  know)  into  eternity.  AVhile  I  was  going  to  preach 
 to  the  Indians,  my  foul  was  in  anguifh  ;  I  uas  fo  ovei borne 
 with  difcvDuragement,  that  I  dcfpaired  of  doing  any  good, 
 and  was  driven  to  my  wits-end  ;  1  knew  nothing  what  to  fay, 
 nor  what  courfe  to  take.  But  at  laft  I  infiftcd  on  the  cvidf  nee 
 we  have  of  the  truth  of  Chriftianity  from  the  mhaclts  of 
 Chrift;  many  of  which  I  fct  before  them:  and  God  hcljed 
 me  to  make  a  clofe  application  to  thofe  that  refuled  to  be- 
 lieve the  truth  of  what  I  taught  them  :  and  indeed  I  was 
 enabled  to  fpeak  to  the  confciences  of  all,  in  fome  meafurc. 
 I  w?.s  fonicthing  encouraged,  to  find,  that  God  enabled  me 
 to  be  faithful  once  more.  Then  came  and  preached  to  an- 
 other company  of  them  ;  but  was  very  weai  y  and  faint.  In 
 the  evening,  I  was  fometiung  refrelhed,  and  was  enabled  to 
 pray  and  praife  God  with  compofure  and  afft(SVicn  :  had  lome 
 enlargement  and  courage  with  refpe<Sl:  to  my  work :  was  will- 
 ing to  live,  and  longed  to  do  more  for  God,  than  my  weak 
 flate  ol  body  would  admit  of.  "  I  can  do  all  things  through 
 *'  Chrift  that  ftrengthcns  rfte  ;"  and  by  his  grace,  I  am  w  illing 
 tofpend  and  he  fptnt  in  his  fervice,  when  I  am  not  thus  funk 
 in  dejeftion,  and  a  kind  of  dcfpair. 
 
 Monday,  December  17.  Was  fomething  comfortable  in 
 mind,  mofl:  of  the  day ;  and  was  enabled  to  pray  with  fome 
 freedom,  cheerfulnefs,  compofure,  and  devotion ;  had  alfo 
 fome  afliflance  in  writing  on  a  divine  fubjeft. 
 
 Tuefday,  December  18.  Went  to  the  Indians,  and  dif. 
 courfed  to  them  near  an  hour,  without  any  power  to  come 
 clofe  to  their  hearts.  Btit  at  laft  1  felt  fome  fervency,  and 
 God  helped  me  to  fpeak  with  warmth.  My  inttrpreter  alfo 
 was  amazingly  aflifttd  :  and  I  doubt  not  but  "the  Spirit  of 
 "  God  was  upon  him,"  (though  I  had  no  reafon  to  think  he 
 had  any  true  and  laving  grnce,  hut  was  only  under  conviction 
 of  his  loft  ftatf)  ;  and  prefently  upon  this  moft  of  the  grown 
 perfons  were  much  affected,  and  the  tears  ran  down  their 
 checks ;  and  one  dd  man  (I  fuppofe,  an  hundred  years  old) 
 xvas  fo  afFecred,  that  he  wept,  and  feemed  convinced  of  the 
 importance  of  what  1  taught  them.  I  ftaid  with  them  a 
 eonlidcrable  time,  exherting  and  dircclirg  them ;  and  came 
 away.,  litting  up  my  heart  to  God  in  prayer  and  praife,  and 
 encouraged  and  exhorted  my  interpreter  to  "ftrivc  to  enter 
 
ie.t.r7'      Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  14^ 
 
 "  in  at  the  ftrait  gate."  Came  home,  and  fpent  moft  of  the 
 evening  in  prayer  and  thank fgiving;  and  found  rayfelfmuch 
 enlarged  and  quickened.  Was  greatly  concerned,  that  the 
 Lord's  work  which  feemed  to  be  begun,  might  be  carried  on 
 with  power,  to  the  converfion  of  poor  fouls,  and  the  glory 
 of  divine  grace. 
 
 Wednefday,  December  19.  Spent  a  great  part  of  the  day 
 in  prayer  to  God  for  the  outpouring  ofhii  Spirit  on  my  poor 
 people  ;  as  alfo  to  blefs  his  name  for  awakening  my  intepreter 
 and  foine  others,  and  giving  us  fome  tokens  of  his  prefcncc 
 yelterday.  And  bieffed  be  God,  I  had  much  freedom,  five 
 or  fix  times  in  the  day,  in  prayer  and  praife,  and  felt  a  weighty 
 concern  up  jn  my  fpirit  for  the  lalvation  of  thofe  precious 
 fouls,  and  the  enlargement  of  the  Redeemer's  kingdom  among 
 them.  My  foul  hoped  in  God  for  fome  fuccefs  m  my  raini- 
 ftry :  and  blcfled  be  his  name  for  fo  much  hope. 
 
 Thurfday,  December  20.  Was  enabled  to  vifit  the  throne 
 of  grace  frequently,  this  day ;  and  through  divine  goodnefs 
 enjoyed  much  freedom  and  fervency,  fundry  times:  was 
 much  alliiled  in  crying  for  mercy  for  my  poor  people,  and 
 felt  cheerfulnefs  and  hope  in  my  requefts  for  them.  I  fpent 
 much  of  the  day  in  writing ;  but  was  enabled  to  intermix 
 prayer  with  my  ftudies. 
 
 Friday,  December  21.  Was  enabled  again  to  pray  with 
 freedom,  chearfulnefs,  and  hope.  God  was  plcafed  to  make 
 the  duty  comfortable  and  pleal'ant  to  me;  fo  that  I  delighted 
 to  perfevere,  and  repeatedly  to  engage  in  it.  Towards  nooa 
 vifited  my  people,  and  fpent  the  whole  time  in  the  way  to 
 them  in  prayer,  longing  to  "  fee  the  power  of  God"  among 
 them,  as  there  appeared  fomething  of  it  the  laft  Tuefdayj 
 and  I  found  it  fweet  to  reft  and  hope  in  God.  Preached  to 
 them  twice,  and  at  two  diftinft  places:  had  confiderable  free- 
 dom each  time,  and  fo  had  my  interpreter.  Several  of  thcra 
 followed  me  from  one  place  to  the  other  :  and  I  thought,  there 
 was  fome  divine  influence  difcernible  amongft  them.  In  the 
 evening,  was  affifted  in  prayer  again.  Blefled,  bieffed  be  the 
 J.ord! 
 
 [Very  much  the  fame  things  are  exprelTed  concerning  his 
 inward  frame,  exercifes,  and  affiftances  on  Saturday,  as  on 
 the  preceding  days.  He  obferves,  that  this  was  a  comfort- 
 able week  to  him.  But  then  concludes,  "  Oh  that  I  had 
 *'  no  reafon  to  complain  of  much  barrennefs  I  Oh  that  there 
 *■*  were  no  vain  thoughts  and  evil  affections  lodging  within  me! 
 *"  The  Lord  Knows  how  I  long  for  that  world^  where  they 
 
 «  reft 
 
!42  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  J.D.  1744; 
 
 '  reft  not  day  nor  night,  faying,  Hdy,  holy,  holy  is  the  Lord 
 *  God  Jlm/ghfy,''  Sec.  On  the  following  Sabbath,  he  fpeaks 
 of  alGftance  and  freedom  in  his  public  work,  but  as  havin<T 
 lefs  of  the  fenfible  prefencc  of  God,  than  frequently  in  the 
 veek  paft ;  but  yet  fays,  his  foul  was  kept  from  finking  in 
 difcouragement.  On  Monday,  again  he  fcemed  to  enjoy 
 very  much  the  fame  liberty  and  fervency,  through  the  day, 
 that  he  enjoyed  through  the  greater  part  of  the  preceding 
 week  *.] 
 
 Tuefday,  December  25.  Enjoyed  very  little  quiet  flecp^laft 
 Jaight,  by  reafon  of  bodily  weaknefs,  and  the  clofenefs  of  my 
 lludies  yefterday :  yet  my  heart  was  fomewhat  lively  in  prayer 
 and  praife;  I  was  delighted  with  the  divine  glory  and  happi- 
 nefs,  and  rejoiced  that  God  was  God,  and  that  he  was  un- 
 changeably pofTefTed  of  glory  and  bleffcdnefs.  Though  God 
 held  my  eyes  waking,-  yet  he  helped  me  to  improve  my  time 
 profitably  amidft  my  pains  and  weaknefs,  in  continued  medi- 
 'rations  on  Luke  xiii.  7.  "  Behold,  thefe  three  years  I  come  feek- 
 *''  ing  fruit,"  6-c.  My  meditations  were  fweet ;  and  I  want- 
 ed to  fet  before  fir.ners  their  fin  and  danger. 
 
 [He  continued  in  a  very  low  date,  as  to  his  bodily  health, 
 for  fome  days;  which  feems  to  have  been  a  great  hindrance 
 to  him  in  his  religious  exercifes  and  purfuits.  But  yet  he  ex- 
 prefles  fome  degree  of  divine  aififtancc,  from  day  to  day, 
 through  the  remaining  part  of  this  week.  He  preached  feve- 
 ral  times  this  week  to  his  Indians ;  and  there  appeared  ftiil 
 fome  concern  amongft  them  for  their  fouls.  On  Saturday,  he 
 rode  to  the  Irifh  fettlement,  about  fifteen  miles  from  his 
 lodgings,  in  order  to  fpend  the  Sabbath  there.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  December  30.  Difcourfcd,  b6th  parts  of  the 
 day,  from  ?Iark  viii.  34.  *'  Whofoever  will  come  after  me," 
 ^c.  God  gave  me  very  great  freedom  and  clearnefs,  and  (in  the 
 afternoon  efpecially)  confider.ible  warmth  and  fervency.  In 
 the  everiing  alfo,  had  very  great  clearnefs  while  converfing 
 with  friends  on  divine  things :  I  do  not  remember  ever  to  have 
 had  more  c'ear  apprehenfions  of  religion  in  my  life :  but  found 
 a  flruggie,  in  the  evening,  with  fpiritual  pride. 
 
 [On  Monda}',  he  preached  again  in  the  fame  place  with 
 
 *  This  day  he  wrote  the  //th  Utter  added  at  the  end  of  thi? 
 fciftory. 
 
 freedom 
 
 I 
 
Jr/.  27-      Mr    DAVID     BRAINERD.  143 
 
 freedom  and  fervency;  and  rode  home  to  his  lodging;  and 
 arrived  in  the  evening,  under  a  confidcrable  degree  of  bodi- 
 ly illnefs,  which  continued  the  two  next  days.  And  he  com- 
 plains much  of  fpiritual  emptincfs  and  barrcnneis  on  thofe 
 days.] 
 
 Thurfday,  January  3.  1744-5.  Being  fenfible  of  the  great 
 want  of  divine  influences,  and  the  outpouring  of  God's  Spirit, 
 I  fpent  this  day  in  fading  and  prayer,  to  feek  fo  great  a  mer- 
 cy for  myi'elf,  and  my  poor  people  in  particular,  and  for  the 
 church  of  God  in  general.  In  the  morning,  was  very  lifelefs 
 in  prayer,  and  could  get  fcarce  any  fenfe  of  God.  Near  noon, 
 enjoyed  fome  fweet  freedom  to  pray  that  the  ivill  of  God 
 might  in  every  refpeft  become  ?nl>ie  ;  and  I  am  perfuaded,  it 
 was  fo  at  that  time  in  fome  good  degree.  In  the  afternoon, 
 I  was  exceeding  weak,  and  could  not  enjoy  much  fervency 
 In  prayer;  but  felt  a  great  degree  of  dejeftion  ;  which,  I  be- 
 lieve, was  very  much  awing  to  my  bodily  weaknefs  and  dil^ 
 order. 
 
 Friday,  January  4.  Rode  up  to  the  Indians,  near  noon; 
 fpent  fome  time  there  under  great  diforder :  my  foul  wzs/unk 
 down  into  deep  waters,  and  I  was  almofl  overwhelmed  with 
 melancholy. 
 
 Saturday,  January  5.  Was  able  to  do  fomething  at  wri- 
 ting ;  but  was  much  difordered  with  pain  in  my  head.  At 
 night,  was  diftrefled  with  a  fenfe  of  my  fpiritual  pollution,  and 
 ten  thoufand  youthful,  yea,  and  childifh  follies,  that  no  body 
 but  myfelf  had  any  thought  about ;  all  which  appeared  to  me 
 jiow  frefh,  and  in  a  lively  view,  as  if  committed  }'efterday, 
 and  made  my  foul  afhamed  before  God,  and  caufed  me  to  hate 
 Hiyfelf. 
 
 Lord's  day,  January  6.  Was  ftill  diftrefTed  with  vapoury 
 diforders.  Preached  to  my  poor  Indians;  but  had  little  heart 
 •r  life.  Towards  night,  my  foul  v/as  prefT^d  under  a  fenfe 
 •f  my  unfaithfulnefs.  O  the  joy  and  peace  that  arifes  from 
 a  fenfe  of  "  having  obtained  mercy  of  God  to  be  faithful!'^ 
 And  Oh  the  mifery  and  anguifli  that  fpring  from  an  appre- 
 fcenfion  of  the  contrary-! 
 
 [His  dejection  continued  the  two  next  days  ;  but  not  to  fo 
 great  a  degree  on  Tuefday,  when  he  enjoyed  fome  freedom 
 and  fervency  in  preaching  to  the  Indians.] 
 
 Wednefday,  January  9.  In  the  morning,  God  was  pica  fed 
 to  remove  that  gloona  which  has  of  late  opprefTed  my  mind, 
 
 and 
 
144  T  U  E     L  t  F  E     O  P  A.D,  1745. 
 
 and  gave  me  freedom  and  fweetnefs  in  prayer.  I  was  encou- 
 raged, and  ftrengthened,  and  enabled  to  plead  for  grace  foi* 
 myielf,  and  mercy  for  my  poor  Indians;  and  was  iWeetly 
 alfifted  in  my  interceflions  with  God  for  others.  Bleffed  be 
 his  holy  name  for  ever  and  ever.  Amen,  and  Amen.  Thofe 
 things  that  of  late  have  appeared  moft  difficult  and  almoft  im- 
 poflible,  now  appeared  not  only  poflible,  but  eafy.  My  foul 
 fo  much  delighted  to  continue  inftant  in  prayer,  at  this  blcfC- 
 ed  feafon,  that  I  had  no  defire  for  my  necejj'ary  fojd:  even 
 dreaded  leaving  off  praying  at  all.  left  I  fliould  lofe  this  fpiri- 
 tuality,  and  this  bleffed  thankfulnefs  to  God  which  I  then  felt. 
 1  felt  now  quite  willing  to  live,  and  undergo  all  trials  that 
 might  remain  for  me  in  a  world  of  forrow ;  but  ftill  longed 
 for   heaven,  that  I  might  glorify  God  in  a  perfedl  manner. 
 
 0  **  come,  Lord  Jefus,  come  quickly."  Spent  the  day  ia 
 reading  a  little ;  and  in  fome  diverlions,  which  I  was  necef^ 
 iitatcd  to  take  by  reafon  of  much  weakncfs  and  diiorder. 
 In  the  evening,  enjoyed  foipe  freedom  and  intcnfcncfs  in 
 prayer. 
 
 [The  three  remaining  days  of  the  week,  he  was  very  low 
 and  feeble  in  body ;  but  neverthelefs  continued  conftantly  in 
 the  fame  comfortable  fweet  frame  of  mind,  as  is  exprefled 
 •n  Wednefday.  On  the  Sabbath,  this  fweetnefs  in  fpiritual 
 alacrity  began  to  abate;  but  ftill  he  enjoyed  fome  degree  of 
 comfort,  and  had  aififtance  in  preaching  to  the  Indians.^ 
 
 Monday,  January  14.  Spent  this  day  under  a  great  degree 
 •f  bodily  weaknefs  and  diforder;  and  had  very  little  freedom^ 
 either  in  my  ftudies  or  devotions :  and  in  the  evening,  I  was 
 much  dejedled  and  melancholy.  It  pains  and  diftrefles  me, 
 that  I  live  fo  much  of  my  time  for  nothing.  I  long  to  do 
 Miuch  in  a  little  time,  and  if  it  might  be  the  Lord's  will,  to 
 fn'fo  my  work  fpeedily  in  this  tirefome  world.  I  am  fuie,  I 
 do  not  defire  to  live  for  any  thing  in  this  world ;  and  through 
 grace  I  am  not  afraid  to  look  the  king  af  terrors  in  the  face: 
 
 1  know,  I  (hall  be  afraid,  if  God  leaves  me ;  and  therefore  I 
 think  it  always  duty  to  lay  in  for  that  folemn  hour.  But  for 
 a  very  confiderable  time  paft,  my  foul  has  rejoiced  to  think 
 ©f  death  in  its  neareft  approaches ;  and  even  when  1  have  been 
 very  weak,  and  feemed  nearefl  eternity.  '■'  Not  unto  me, 
 "  not  unto  me,  but  to  God  be  the  glory."  I  feel  that  which 
 convinces  me,  that  if  God  do  not  enable  me  to  maintain  a 
 holy  dependence  upon  him,  death  Vv'ill  eafily  be  a  terror  to 
 5ne ;  but  at  prefent,  I  muft  fay,  "  I  long  to  depart,  and  to  be 
 
 "  with 
 
^t.^^,      M  R    D  A  V  I  D     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  145 
 
 "  with  Chrift,"  which  is  beft  of  all.  When  I  am  in  a  fweet 
 rcfigned  frame  of  foul,  I  am  willing  to  tarry  a  while  in  a  world 
 of  forrow,  I  am  willing  to  be  from  home  as  long  as  God  fees 
 £t  it  (hould  be  fo ;  but  when  I  want  the  influence  of  this 
 temper,  I  am  then  apt  to  be  impatient  to  be  gone. — Oh  when 
 -will  the  day  appear,  that  I  fhall  be  perfect  in  holinefs,  and  in. 
 the  enjoyment  of  God ! 
 
 [The  next  day  was  fpent  uader  a  great  degree  of  dcjeftion 
 and  melancholy ;  which  (as  he  himfelf  fays,  he  was  perfua- 
 dcd)  was  owing  partly  to  bodily  weaknefs,  and  vapoury  dif^ 
 orders.} 
 
 Wedncfday  and  Thurfday,  January  16.  and  17.  I  fpent 
 raoft  of  the  time  in  writing  on  a  fweet  divine  fubjeft,  and  en- 
 joyed fome  freedom  and  ailiftance.  Was  likewife  enabled  to 
 ^ray  more  frequently  and  fervently  than  ufual :  and  my  foul, 
 I  think,  rejoiced  in  God  ;  efpecially  on  the  evening  of  the  laft 
 of  thefe  days  :  praife  then  feemed  comely,  and  I  delighted  to 
 blefs  the  Lord.  O  what  reafon  have  I  to  be  thankful,  that 
 God  ever  helps  me  to  labour  and  ftudy  for  him !  he  docs  but 
 receive  his  own,  when  I  am  enabled  in  any  meafure  to  praife 
 him,  labour  for  him,  and  live  to  him.  Oh,  how  comfortable 
 and  fweet  it  is,  to  feel  the  ailiftance  of  divine  grace  in  the  per- 
 formance of  the  duties  God  has  enjoined  us!  "  Blefs  the  Lord, 
 "  Gray  foul." 
 
 [The  fame  enlargement  of  heart,  and  joyful  frame  of  foul, 
 continued  through  the  next  day.  But  on  the  day  following  it 
 began  to  decline ;  which  decay  feems  to  have  continued  the 
 whole  of  the  next  week  :  yet  he  enjoyed  feme  feafons  of  fpc- 
 cial  and  fweet  affiftance.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  January  27.  Had  the  greateft  degree  of  Inward 
 anguifli,  that  almoft  ever  I  endured :  I  was  pcrfeflly  over- 
 whelmed, and  fo  confufed,  that  after  I  began  to  difcourfe  to 
 the  Indians,  before  I  could  iinifh  a  fentence,  fometlmes  I 
 forgot  entirely  v*^hat  I  was  aiming  at ;  or  if,  with  much  diffi- 
 culty, I  had  recollected  what  I  had  before  defigned,  ftill  it 
 appeared  ftrange,  and  like  fomething  I  had  long  forgotten, 
 and  had  now  but  an  imperfefl  remembrance  of.  I  know  it 
 was  a  degree  of  diftraftion,  occafioned  by  vapoury  diforders, 
 melancholy,  fpiritual  defertion,  and  fome  other  things  that 
 particularly  prefled  upon  me  this  morning,  with  an  uncom- 
 mon weight,  tho  principal  of  which  refpeftcd  my  Indians. 
 
 T  This 
 
146  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  J.  D,  174^. 
 
 This  diftrefTing  gloom  never  went  off  the  whole  day ;  but  wai- 
 fo  far  removed,  that  I  was  enabled  to  fpeak  with  I'ome  free- 
 dom and  concern  to  the  Indians,  at  two  of  their  fettlemcnts ; 
 and  1  think,  there  was  fomc  appearance  of  the  prefcncc  of 
 God  with  us,  fome  fcrioufnefs,  and  feeming  concern  among 
 the  Indians,  at  leaft  a  few  of  them.  In  the  evening,  this 
 gloom  continued  ftill,  till  family-piayer  *,  about  nine  o'clock, 
 and  almoll  through  tLh,  until  I  came  near  the  clofe,  when 
 3  was  praying  (as  I  ufually  do)  for  the  illumination  and  con- 
 verfion  of  my  poor  people  ;  and  then  the  cloud  was  fcattcrcd, 
 fo  that  I  enjoyed  fweetnefs  and  freedom,  and  conceived  hopes, 
 that  God  dcfigned  mercy  for  fome  of  them.  The  fame  I 
 enjoyed  afterwards  in  fccret  prayer;  in  v/hich  precious  duty 
 I  had  for  a  confiderable  time  fweetnefs  and  freedom,  and  (I 
 ho|5e)  faith,  in  praying  for  myfelf,  my  poor  Indians,  and  dear 
 friends  and  acquaintance  in  New-England,  and  elfewhere,  and 
 for  the  dear  intereft  of  Zion  in  general.  "  Blefs  the  Lord, 
 *'  O  my  foul,  and  forget  not  all  his  benefits." 
 
 [He  fpent  the  reft  of  this  week,  or  at  leafl:  the  mod  of  it, 
 under  dejeftion  and  melancholy ;  which  on  Friday  rofe  to  an 
 extreme  height ;  he  being  then,  as  he  himfelf  obferves,  much 
 exercifed  with  vapoury  diforders.  This  exceeding  gloominefs 
 continued  on  Saturday,  till  the  evening,  when  he  was  again 
 relieved  in  family-prayer ;  and  after  it,  was  refrefhed  in  fecret, 
 and  felt  willing  to  live,  and  endure  hardflaips  in  the  caufe  of 
 God ;  and  found  his  hopes  of  the  advancement  of  Chrifl's 
 kingdom,  as  alfo  his  hopes  to  fee  the  foiver  of  Cod  ^mong  the 
 poor  Indians,  conliderably  ratfed.} 
 
 Lord's  day,  February  3.  In  the  morning,  I  was  fomewhat 
 relieved  of  that  gloom  and  confufion,  that  my  mind  has  of 
 late  been  greatly  exercifed  with :  was  enabled  to  pray  with 
 fome  compofure  and  comfort.  But,  however,  went  to  my 
 Indians  trembling  ;  for  my  foul  "  remembered  the  wormwood 
 *'  and  the  gall"  (I  might  almofl  fay  the  hell)  of  Friday  laftj 
 and  I  was  greatly  afraid  I  fliould  be  obliged  again  to  drink  ot 
 that  cup  of  trembling,  which  was  inconceivably  more  bitter 
 than  death,  and  made  me  long  for  the  grave  more,  unfpeak- 
 ably  more,  than  for  hid  treafurcs,  yea,  inconceivably  more 
 
 *  Though  Mr  Erainerd  now  dwelt  by  himfelf  jn  the  foremen- 
 tioned  little  cottage,  which  be  had  built  for  his  own  ufe  ;  yet  that 
 was  near  to  jl  family  of  white  people  with  whom  he  had  lived  before, 
 and  with  whom  he  dill  attended  family- prayer. 
 
 than 
 
JEt.^7'      Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  147 
 
 than  the  men  of  this  worid  long  for  fuch  treafures.  But  God 
 was  pleafcd  to  hear  my  cries,  and  to  afford  me  great  aflift- 
 ance ;  fo  that  I  felt  peace  in  my  own  foul ;  and  was  fatisfied, 
 that  if  not  one  of  the  Indians  fhould  be  profited  by  my  preach- 
 ing, but  fhould  all  be  damned,  yet  I  fhould  be  accepted  and 
 rewarded  as  faithful ;  for  I  am  perfuaded,  God  enabled  mc  to 
 be  fo. Had  fome  good  degree  of  help  afterwards,  at  ano- 
 ther place ;  and  much  longed  for  the  converfion  of  the  poor 
 Indians.  Was  fomewhat  refreflied,  and  comfortable,  towards 
 night,  and  in  the  evening.  O  that  my  foul  might  praife  the 
 Lord  for  his  goodnefsl Enjoyed  fome  freedom,  in  the  even- 
 ing, in  meditation  on  Luke  xiii.  24. 
 
 [In  the  three  next  days,  he  was  the  fubje£l  of  much  de- 
 jeftion :  but  the  thr^e  remaining  days  of  the  week  feeni  to 
 have  been  fpent  with  much  compofure  and  comfort.  On 
 the  next  Sabbath,  he  preached  at  Greenwich  in  New-Jer- 
 fey.  In  the  evening,  he  rode  eight  miles  to  vifit  a  fick 
 man  at  the  point  of  death,  and  found  him  fpeechlefs  and 
 fenfelefs.] 
 
 Monday,  February  ii.  About  break-of-day,  the  lick  man 
 died.  I  was  affedled  at  the  fight :  fpent  the  morning  with 
 the  mourners  :  and  after  prayer,  and  fome  difcourfe  with  them, 
 I  returned  to  Greenwich,  and  preached  again  from  Pfal. 
 Ixxxix.  15.  and  the  Lord  gave  me  affiflance  :  I  felt  a  fweet  love* 
 to  fouls,  and  to  the  kingdom  of  Chrift ;  and  longed  that  poor 
 linners  might  know  the  joyful  found.  Screral  perfons  were 
 much  affefted.  And  after  meeting,  I  was  enabled  to  dif  ^ 
 courfe,  with  freedom  and  concern,  to  fome  perfons  that  ap- 
 plied to  me  under  fpiritual  trouble.  Left  the  place,  fweetiy 
 compofed,  and  rode  home  to  my  boufe  about  eight  miles 
 diftant.  Difcourfed  to  friends,  and  inculcated  divine  truths 
 upon  fome.  In  the  evening,  was  in  the  moll  folemn  frame 
 that  almoft  ever  \|  remember  to  have  experienced :  I  know 
 not  that  ever  death  appeared  more  real  to  me,  or  that  ever  I 
 faw  myfelf  in  the  condition  of  a  dead  corpfe,  laid  out,  and 
 drefTed  for  a  lodging  in  the  filent  grave,  fo  evidently  as  at  this 
 time.  And  yet  I  felt  exceeding  comfortably ;  my  mind 
 was  compofed  and  calm,  and  death  appeared  without  a  fii'g. 
 I  think,  I  never  felt  fuch  an  univerial  m.ortification  to  all 
 created  obje(5ts  as  now.  Oh,  how  great  and  folemn  a  thing 
 it  appeared  to  die !  Oh,  how  it  lays  the  greatef]  honour  in 
 theduft!  And  oh,  how  vain  and  trilling  did  die  riches,  ho- 
 nours, and  pleafures  of  the -world  appear!  I  could  not,  I  dafc 
 
 T  z  not. 
 
148  T  H  E    L  I  f  E     O  F  J.  D.  1745. 
 
 not,  fo  much  as  think  of  any  of  them ;  for  death,  deathy  fo- 
 leinn  (though  not  frightful)  death  appeared  at  the  door.  Oh, 
 I  could  fee  myfclf  dead,  and  laid  out,  and  inclofed  in  my  cof- 
 fin, and  put  down  into  the  cold  grave,  with  greateft  folem- 
 nity,  but  without  terror !  I  fpent  moft  of  the  evening  in  «on» 
 vcrfing  with  a  dear  Chriftian  friend ;  and,  bleflcd  be  God,  it 
 
 was  a  comfortable  evening  to  us  both. What  are  friends? 
 
 What  are  comforts  ?  What  are  forrows  ?  What  are  diftreffesf 
 -^"  The  time  is  fhort :  it  remains,  that  they  which  weep,  be 
 *'  as  though  they  wept  not;  and  they  which  rejoice,  as  though 
 "  they  rejoiced  not:  for  the  falhion  of  this  world  pafTcih 
 "  away.  O  come,  Lord  Jefus,  come  quickly.  Amen."— — ' 
 BlefTed  be  God  for  the  comforts  of  the  part  day. 
 
 Tuefday,  February  12.  Was  exceeding  weak;  but  in  & 
 fweet  refigned,  compofed  frame,  moft  of  the  day :  felt  my 
 heart  freely  go  forth  after  God  in  prayer. 
 
 Wednefday,  February  13.  Was  much  exercifed  with  va* 
 poury  diforders ;  but  ftill  enabled  to  maintain  folemnity,  and 
 I  think,  fpirituality. 
 
 Thurfday,  February  14.  Spent  the  day  in  writing  on  a  di- 
 vine fubjeft:  enjoyed  health,  and  freedom  in  my  work:  had 
 a  lolenin  fenfe  of  death  ;  as  I  have  indeed  had  every  day  this 
 week,  in  fome  meafare  :  what  1  felt  on  Monday  laft,  has  been 
 abiding,  in  fome  confideraWe  degree,  ever  fince. 
 
 Friday,  February  15.  Was  engaged  in  writing  again  almoft 
 ^the  whole  day.  In  the  evening,  was  much  affifted  in  medita- 
 ting on  that  precious  text,  John  vii.  37.  "  Jefus  ftood  and 
 "  cried,"  ^c.  1  had  then  a  fweet  fenfe  of  the  free  grace  of 
 the  gofpel:  my  foul  was  encouraged,  warmed,  and  quickened^ 
 and  my  defires  drawn  out  after  God  in  prayer :  my  foul  was 
 watchful,  and  afraid  of  lofmg  fo  fweet  a  gueft  as  I  then  enter- 
 tained. I  continued  long  in  prayer  and  meditation,  intermix* 
 ing  one  with  the  other ;  and  was  unwilling  to  be  diverted  by 
 any  thing  at  all  from  fo  fweet  an  excrcifc.  I  longed  to  pro- 
 claim the  grace  I  then  meditated  upon,  to  the  world  of  fin- 
 ners.— O  how  quick  and  powerful  is  the  word  of  the  blefted 
 God! 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  complains  of  grett  conflifts  with  cor* 
 ruption,  and  much  difcompofure  of  mind.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  February  17.  Preached  to  the  ivhite  people  (my 
 interpreter  being  abfent)  in  the  wildernefs  upon  the  funny  fide 
 of  a  hill :  had  a  confiderable  a/Tembly,  confifting  of  people 
 that  lived  (at  leaft  maay  of  them)  not  iefs  than  thirty  miles 
 
 afundcr  % 
 
^/.  a;-       M  R    D  A  V  I  D    B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  14^ 
 
 afundcr ;  forae  of  them  came  near  twenty  miles.  I  difeourfed 
 to  them,  all  day,  from  John  vii.  37.  "  Jcfus  ftood  and  cried, 
 "  faying,  If  any  man  thirft,"  drc.  In  the  afternoon,  it  plea- 
 fed  God  to  grant  me  great  freedom  and  fervency  in  my  di& 
 courfe  ;  and  I  was  enabled  to  imitate  the  example  of  Chrift  in, 
 the  text,  ■whojlood  and  cried. — I  think,  I  was  fcarce  ever  en- 
 abled to  offer  the  free  grace  of  God  to  pcrifhing  fmners  with 
 more  freedom  «ind  plairinefs  in  my  life.  And  afterwards,  I 
 was  enabled  earneftly  to  invite  the  children  of  God  to  come 
 rencwedly,  and  drink  of  this  fountain  of  water  of  life,  from 
 whence  they  have  heretofore  derived  unfpeakable  fatisfaftion." 
 It  was  a  very  comfortable  time  to  me :  there  were  many  tears 
 in  the  afTembly  ;  and  I  doubt  not  but  that  the  Spirit  of  God  was 
 there,  convincing  poor  finners  of  their  need  of  Chrift.  In 
 the  evening,  I  felt  compofed,  and  comfortable,  though  much 
 tired :  I  naid  fome  fweet  fenfe  of  the  excellency  and  glory  of 
 God  ;  and  my  foul  rejoiced,  that  he  was  "  God  over  all,  blefT 
 *'  ed  for  ever  ;"  but  was  too  much  crouded  with  company 
 and  converfation,  and  longed  to  be  more  alone  with  God.  Oh 
 that  I  could  for  ever  bicfs  God  for  the  mercy  of  this  day,  who 
 "  anfwered  me  in  the  joy  of  my  heart." 
 
 {[The  reft  of  this  week  feems  to  have  been  fpent  under  a 
 decay  of  this  life  and  joy,  and  in  diftreffing  conflicts  with 
 corruption ;  but  not  without  fome  fcafons  of  refreftimcnt  and 
 comfort.J 
 
 Lord's  day,  February  24.  In  the  morning,  was  much  per- 
 plexed :  my  interprete?-  being  abfent,  I  knew  not  how  to  per- 
 form my  work  among  the  Indians.  However,  I  rode  to  the 
 Indians,  got  a  Dutchman  to  interpret  for  me,  though  he  was 
 but  poorly  qualified  for  the  bufmefs.  Afterwards,  I  came 
 and  preached  to  a  few  white  people  from  John  vi.  67.  Here 
 the  Lord  feemed  to  unburden  me  in  fome  meafure,  efpecially 
 towards  the  clofe  of  my  difcourfe ;  I  felt  freedom  to  open 
 the  love  of  Chrifi  to  his  own  dear  dtfciples :  when  the  reft  of 
 the  ^K orldf orfakes  him,  and  zxt  forjaken  by  him,  that  he  calls 
 them  no  more,  he  then  turns  to  his  own,  and  fays,  "Will  ye 
 ^'  alfo  go  away?"  I  had  a  fenfe  of  the  free  grace  of  Chrift  to 
 his  own  people,  in  fuch  feafons  of  general  apoftafy,  and  when 
 they  thcmfelvcs  in  fome  mcafurc  backllide  with  the  world.  O 
 the  free  grace  of  Chrift,  that  he  feafonably  minds  his  people 
 of  their  danger  of  backQiding,  and  invites  them  to  pcrfcverc 
 in  their  adherence  to  himfelf  I  1  faw  that  backjliditig  fouls, 
 who  feemed  to  be  shout  to  go  ei'wdy  with  the  world,  might 
 
 return, 
 
I5«  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F  A.D.  1745. 
 
 return,  and  welcome,  to  him  Imjuediately  ;  without  any  thing 
 to  recommend  them  ;  notwithftanding  all  their  former  back- 
 ilidings.  And  thus  my  difcourfe  was  fuited  to  my  own  foul's 
 cafe :  for,  of  late,  I  have  found  a  great  want  of  this  fenfe 
 and  apprehenfion  of  divine  grace ;  and  have  often  been  greatly 
 diftrefled  in  my  own  foul,  becaufe  I  did  not  fuitably  appre- 
 hend this  "fountain  opened  to  purge  away  fui;"  and  fo  have 
 been  too  much  labouring  for  fpiritual  life,  peace  of  con- 
 fcience,  and  progrefTive  holinefs,  in  my  own  ftrength:  but  now 
 God  file  wed  me,  in  fome  meafure,  the  arm  of  all  ftrength, 
 and  the  fountain  of  all  grace. — In  the  evening,  I  felt  folemn, 
 devout,  and  fweet,  refting  on  free  grace  for  affiftance,  accept- 
 ance, and  peace  of  confcience. 
 
 [Within  the  fpace  of  the  next  mine  days,  he  had  frequent 
 refrefhing,  invigorating  influences  of  God's  Spirit ;  attended 
 with  complaint  of  dulnefs,  and  with  longings  after  fpiritual 
 life  and  holy  fervency.] 
 
 Wednefday,  March  6.  Spent  moft  of  the  day  in  preparing 
 for  a  journey  to  New- England.  Spent  fome  time  in  prayer, 
 with  a  fpecial  reference  to  my  intended  journey.  Was  afraid 
 I  fhould  forfake  the  fountain  of  living  ivaters,  and  attempt  to 
 derive  fatisfaction  from  broken  cijlerns,  my  dear  friends  and 
 acquaintance,  with  whom  I  might  meet  in  my  journey.  I 
 looked  to  God  to  keep  me  from  this  vanity  in  fpecial,  as  well 
 as  others.  Towards  night,  and  in  the  evening,  was  vifited 
 fey  fome  friends,  fome  of  whom^  I  truft,  were  real  Chriftans  ; 
 who  difcovered  an  affeflionate  regard  to  me,  and  feemed 
 grieved  that  I  was  about  to  leave  them ;  efpecially  feeing  I 
 tlid  not  expefl  to  make  any  confiderable  ft  ay  among  them,  if 
 I  fhould  live  to  return  from  New- England*.  O  how  kind 
 bas  God  been  to  mei  how  has  he  railed  up  friends  in  every 
 place,  where  his  providence  has  called  me!  friends  are  a  great 
 comfort;  and  it  is  God  that  gives  them  ;  it  is  he  makes  them 
 friendly  to  me.  ''Blefs  the  Lord,  O  my  foul,  and  forget  not 
 ^^  all  his  benefits." 
 
 [The  next  daj^,  he  fet  out  on  his  journey;  and  it  was  a- 
 bout  five  weeks  before  he  returned. —  The  fpecial  defign  of 
 this  journey,  -he  himfelf  declares  afterwards,  in  his  diary  for 
 March  21.  where,  fpeaking  of  his  converfmg  with  a  certain 
 
 *  It  ftems,  he  had  a  defign,  by  v/hat  afterwards  appears,  tp 
 reipoye  and  live  among  the  Indians  at  Sufquahan^^ah  river. 
 
 minifter 
 
m.11*      Mr    DAVID    B  R  A  1  N  E  R  D.  451 
 
 minifter  in  New- England,  he  fays  thus,  "Contrived  with  him 
 "  how  to  raife  fome  money  among  Chriflian  friends,  in  order 
 "  to  fupport  a  colleague  with  me  in  the  wildernefs,  (I  having 
 "  now  fpent  two  years  in  a  very  folitary  manner),  that  wc 
 "  might  be  together;  as  Chrift  fent  out  his  dilciples  two  and 
 **  tw') :  and  as  this  was  the  principal  concern  1  had  in  view, 
 '^  in  taking  this  journey,  fo  I  took  pains  in  it,  and  hope  God 
 "  will  fucceed  it,  if  for  his  glory/'  He  firft  went  into  vari- 
 ous parts  of  New-Jerfey,  and  vifited  feveral  miniftcrs  there : 
 and  then  went  to  New- York;  and  fiom  thence  into  New- 
 England,  going  to  various  parts  of  Connefticut :  and  then  re- 
 turned into  New-Jerfey  :  he  met  a  number  of  minifters  at 
 Woodbridge,  "who,"  he  fays,  "met  there  to  confult  abouc 
 *^  the  affairs  of  ChrifPs  kingdom,  in  fome  important  articles.'* 
 He  feems,  for  the  moft  part,  to  have  been  free  from  melan- 
 choly in  this  journey  ;  and  many  times  to  have  had  extraordi- 
 nary affiftance  in  public  miniftrations,  and  his  preaching 
 fometimes  attended  with  very  hopeful  appearances  of  a  good 
 cffeft  on  the  auditory.  He  alfo  had  many  feafons  of  fpecial 
 comfort  and  fpiritual  refreftiment,  in  converfation  with  mini- 
 fters  and  other  Chriftian  friends,  and  alfo  in  meditation  and 
 prayer  by  himfelf  alone.] 
 
 Saturday/  April  13.  Rode  home  to  my  own  houfe  at  the 
 Forks  of  Delaware :  was  enabled  to  remember  the  goodnefs 
 oi  the  Lord,  who  has  now  preferved  me  v/hile  riding  full  Hx 
 hundred  miles  in  this  journey;  has  kept  me  that  none  of  my 
 bones  have  been  broken.  Bleffed  be  the  Lord,  who  has  pre- 
 ferved me  in  this  tedious  journey,  and  returned  me  in  fafety 
 to  my  own  houfe.  Verily  it  is  God  that  has  upheld  me,  and 
 guarded  my  goings. 
 
 Lord's  day,  April  14.  Was  difordered  in  body  with  the  fa- 
 tigues of  my  late  journey ;  but  was  enabled  however  to  preach 
 to  a  confiderable  affembly  of  white  people,  gathered  from  all 
 parts  round  about,  with  fome  freedom,  from  Ezek.  xxxiii. 
 II.  "  As  I  live,  faith  the  Lord  Cod,"  tc.  Had  much  more 
 affiftance  than  I  expefted. 
 
 [This  week,  he  went  a  journey  to  Philadelphia,  in  order 
 to  engage  the  gavermr  there  to  ufc  his  interefl  with  the  chief 
 man  of  the  Six  Nations,  (with  whom  he  maintained  a  ftri(ft 
 friendfhip),  that  he  would  give  him  leave  to  live  at  Sufqua- 
 hannah,  and  inftm^t  the  Indipjas  that  are  v/ithin  their  territo- 
 ries. 
 
XS2  f  H  E    L  I  F  E    O  F  ^.  D.  1745. 
 
 ries  *.  In  his  way  to  and  from  thence,  he  lodged  with  Mr 
 JBeaty,  a  young  Prelbyterian  miniftcr.  He  fpeaks  of  fea- 
 fons  of  fwect  fpihtual  refrefhmcnt  that  he  enjoyed  at  his 
 lodgings.] 
 
 Saturday,  April  26.  Rode  with  Mr  Be'aty  to  Abington,  t© 
 attend  Mr  Treat's  adminiftration  of  the  facrament,  according 
 to  the  method  of  the  church  of  Scotland.  When  we  arrived, 
 we  found  Mr  Treat  preaching :  afterwards  I  preached  a  f«r- 
 mon  from  Matth.  v.  3.  *'  Bleffed  are  the  poor  in  fpirit,"  ^f, 
 God  was  pleafed  to  give  me  great  freedom  and  tendernefs, 
 both  in  prayer  and  fermon :  the  affembly  was  fweetly  melted, 
 and  fcores  were  all  in  tears.  It  was,  as  I  then  hoped,  and 
 was  afterwards  abundantly  fatisfied  by  converfing  with  them, 
 a  "  word  fpoken  in  feafon  to  many  weary  fouls."  I  was 
 extremely  tired,  and  my  fpirits  much  exhaufted,  fo  that  I 
 could  fcarcely  (peak  loud ;  yet  I  could  not  help  rejoicing  in 
 God. 
 
 Lord's  day,  April  21.  In  the  morning,  was  calm  and  com* 
 pofed,  and  had  fome  outgoings  of  foul  after  God  in  fecret 
 duties,  and  longing  defires  of  his  prefence  in  the  fan^uary  and 
 at  his  takle  ;  that  his  prefence  might  be  in  the  aflcmbly  ;  and 
 that  his  children  might  be  entertained  with  zfeajl  of f tit  things ~ 
 — In  the  forenoon,  Mr  Treat  preached.  I  felt  fome  affec- 
 tion and  tendernefs  in  the  feafon  of  the  adminiftration  of  the 
 ordinance.  Mr  Beaty  preached  to  the  multitude  abroad,  who 
 could  not  half  have  crouded  into  the  meeting-houfe.  In  the 
 feafon  of  the  communion,  I  had  comfortable  and  fweet  apprc- 
 henfions  of  the  blifsful  communion  of  God's  people,  when 
 they  fhall  meet  at  their  Father's  table  in  his  kingdom,  in  » 
 Hate  of  perfedlion. — In  the  afternoon,  I  preached  abroad  to 
 the  whole  aflcmbly,  from  Rev.  xiv.  4.  "  Thcfe  are  they  that 
 "  follow  the  Lamb,"  <bc.  God  was  pleafed  again  to  give  mc 
 very  great  freedom  and  clearnefs,  but  not  fo  much  warmth  as 
 before.  However,  there  was  a  moft  amazing  attention  in  the 
 whole  an*embly ;  and,  as  I  was  informed  afterwards,  this  was 
 a  fweet  feafon  to  many. 
 
 Monday,  April  22.  I  enjoyed  fome  fweetnefs  in  retire- 
 mcnc,  in  the  morning.     At  eleven  o'clock,  Mr  Beaty  preach* 
 
 *  The  Indians  at  Sufquahannah  are  a  mixed  company  of  many 
 Bations,  fpeaking  various  languages,  and  few  of  them  properly  of 
 the  Six  Nations.  But  yet  the  country  having  formerly  been  con- 
 quered by  the  Six  Nations,  they  claim  the  landj  and  the  Safquahan- 
 naJi-Iadians  are  a  kind  of  rafTals  to  them. 
 
Jff.iS.      Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  153 
 
 cd,  with  freedom  and  life.  Then  I  preached  from  Job  vii. 
 37.  and  concluded  the  folemnity  Had  fome  freedom;  but 
 not  equal  to  what  I  had  enjoyed  before  :  yet  in  the  prayer,  the 
 Lord  enabled  me  to  cry  (I  hope)  with  a  child-like  temper, 
 with  tendernefs  and  brokennefs  of  heart. — Came  home  with 
 Mr  Beaty  to  his  lodgings ;  and  fpent  the  time,  while  riding, 
 and  afterwards,  very  agreeably  on  divme  things. 
 
 Tucfday,  April  23.  Left  Mr  Beaty's,  and  returned  home 
 to  the  Forks  of  Delaware  :  enjoyed  fome  fweet  meditations 
 on  the  road,  and  was  enabled  to  lift  up  my  heart  to  God  in 
 prayer  and  praife. 
 
 [The  two  next  days,  he  fpeaks  of  much  bodily  diforder, 
 but  of  fome  degrees  of  fpiritual  alFiftance  and  freedom.] 
 
 Friday,  April  26,  Converfed  with  a  Chriftian  friend  with 
 fome  warmth  ;  and  felt  a  fpirit  of  mortification  to  the  world^ 
 in  a  very  great  degree.  Afterwards,  was  enabled  to  pray  fer- 
 vently, and  to  rely  on  God  fweetly,  for  "  all  things  pertauv 
 "  ing  to  life  and  godlincfs."  Juft  in  the  evening,  was  vifited 
 by  a  dear  Chriftian  friend,  with  whom  I  fpent  an  hour  or  two 
 in  converfation,  on  the  very  foul  of  religion.  There  are  many 
 with  whom  I  can  talk  about  religion;  but,  alas!  1  find  few 
 with  whom  I  can  talk  religion  itfetf:  but,  bleffed  be  the  Lord, 
 there  are  fome  that  love  to  feed  on  the  kernel,  rather  than  the 
 ihell. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  went  to  the  Irifh  fettlcment,  often  be- 
 fore mentioned,  about  fifteen  miles  diflant ;  where  he  fpent 
 the  Sabbath,  and  preached  with  fome  confiderable  afriftance. 
 On  Monday,  he  returned,  in  a  very  weak  ftate,  to  his  own 
 lodgings.] 
 
 Tuefday,  April  -^o.  Was  fcarce  able  to  M'alk  about,  and 
 was  obliged  to  betake  myfelf  to  the  bed,  much  of  the  day  ; 
 and  fpent  away  the  time  in  a  very  fjlitary  manner  ;  being  nei- 
 ther able  to  read,  meditate,  nor  pray,  and  liad  none  to  con- 
 verfe  with  in  that  wlLiernefs.  Oh,  how  heavily  does  time 
 pafs  away,  when  I  can  do  nothing  to  any  good  purpofe  ;  but 
 feem  obliged  to  trifle  away  precious  time!  Bjt  of  late,  I  have 
 fccn  it  my  duty  to  d'vert  myfelf  by  ail  lawful  means,  that  I 
 may  be  fit,  at  Icaft  fome  fmall  part  of  my  time,  to  labour  fftr 
 God.  And  h.ere  is  the  ditfrrence  between  ir.y  prcf-nt  diver- 
 fions,  and  thofe  I  once  purfued,  when  in  a  natural  itatc.  Then 
 J  made  a  god  of  divcrfions,  delighted  in  them,  with  a  negleft  of 
 
 U  Go  J. 
 
154  T  H  E     L  I  F  fi     O  F  J.D.  1745. 
 
 CjJ,  and  drew  my  highcft  fatisfaction  from  them:  now  I 
 uCe  them  as  mea-iis  to  help  mc  ia  Living  to  Cod ;  fixedly  de- 
 li;T)itlng  in  kim,  ai'id  not  in  them,  drawing  my  higheft  fatif- 
 la«n.ioii  from  him.  Then  they  were  my  all ;  now  they  are 
 only  means  leading  to  ray  alt.  And  rhofe  things  that  are  the 
 greatCil  divGrfion,  wheil  purfued  with  this  viev^,  do  noC 
 tend  to  hinder,  but'promote  my  fplrituality ;  and  I  fee  nowy 
 more  than  ever,  that  they  are  abfolutely  neccfTary. 
 
 WeJaefday,  May  i.  W^'as  not  able  to  fit  up  more  than  half 
 the  day  ;  and  yet  had  fuch  recruits,  of  ftrength  fometimes,  that 
 I  was  able  to  write  a  lif.lc  on  a  divine  fubjeft.  Was  grieved 
 that  I  could  no  more  live  to  God.  In  the  evening,  had  fomc 
 Aveetnefs  and  intcnfcnefs  in  fecrct  pruycri  '    • 
 
 Thuriday,  May  2.  In  the  evening,  being  a  little  better  in 
 health,  1  walked  into  the  woods,  and  enjcycd  a  fweet  feafon 
 af  meditation  and  prayer.  My  thoughts  run  upon  F'fal.  xvii. 
 i^.  "I  iivall  be  fatiLfied,  when  I  awake  with  thy  likenefs."' 
 And  it  was  indeed  a  precious  text  to  me.  I  longed  to  preach 
 to  the  whole  world;  and  it  feemed  to  me,  they  mufl  needs 
 all  be  melted  ia  hearing  fuch  precious  divine  truths,  as  I  had 
 then  a  viev/  and  relidi  oi'.     My  Thoughts  were  exceeding  clear, 
 
 and  ray  fori  was  refrcfned. Blclled  be  the  Lord,  that  in 
 
 my  late  and  prcfent  v/eaknefs,  now  for  many  days  together, 
 my  mind  is  not  gloomy,  as  at  fome  ether  times. 
 •  Friday,  ?.lay  3.  Felt  a  little  vigour  of  body  and  mind,  in' 
 the  morning;  had  fome  freedom,  llrcngrh,  and  fwcetnefs 
 in  prayer.  Rode  to,  and  fpent  fome  time  with  my  Indians. 
 In  the  evening,  again  retiring  into  the  woods,  I  enjoyed  fomc 
 fweet  meditations  on  Ifaiah  liil.  I.  '*'  Yet  it  pleafed  the  Lord 
 "  to  brulfe  him,"  cc. 
 
 [The  direc  next  days  were  fpent  in  much  weaknefs  of- 
 body:  but  yet  he  enjoyed  fome  afuflancc  in  public  and  pri- 
 vate duties ;  iw^i  fjcms  to  have  remained  free  from  melan' 
 choly.] 
 
 Tuefday,  May  7.  Spent  the  day  marnly  in  making  pre- 
 paration for  a  journey  into  the  wiic'erneis.  V/as  ftill  weak, 
 i.nd  coiiccrued  how  I  iiiould  perform  fo  difficult  a  journey. 
 Spent  fome  tim.e  in  prayer  for  the  divine  bleiling,  direc- 
 tion, and  protefiion  in  my  intended  journey ;  but  wanted 
 bodily  flrcngth  to  fpenu  the  day  in  falVmg  and  prayer. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  ^ci  oat  on  his  journey  to  Sufquahannah, 
 w:.:.  \az  L^.tcrnrcrcr.     lie  endured  great  hardlhips  and  fatigues 
 
 V  ill. 
 
JE/. 28.     Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  "155 
 
 in  his  way  thither  through  a  hideous  wildernefs ;  v;here,  af- 
 ter having  lodged  one  night  in  the  open  woods,  he  was  over- 
 taken with  a  north-earfterly  ftorm,  in  which  he  was  almofl 
 ready  to  perifh.     Having  no  manner  of  fbelter,  and  not  be- 
 ing able  to  malce  a  fire  in  fo  great  a  rain,  he  could  have  no 
 comfort  if  he  ftopt ;    therefore   determined    to   go  forward 
 in  hopes  of  meeting  with   fome   fhelter,  without  which  he 
 thought  it   impoifible  he   fhould  live  the  night  through  :  but 
 their  horfes  happening  to  have  eat  poifon  (tor  want  of  other 
 food)  at  a  place  where  they  lodged  the  night  before,  were  fo 
 iick  that  they  could  neither  ride  nor  lead  them,  but  were  obliged 
 to  drive  them  before  them,  and  travel  on  foot;  until  through 
 the  mercy  of  God  (juft  at  dufk)  they  came  to  a  bark-hut, 
 where  they  lodged   that  night.     After  he  came  to    Sufqua- 
 hannah,  he  travelled  about  the  length  of  an  hundred  miles  on 
 the   river,    and   vifited  many  towns  and   fettlements  of  the 
 Indians ;    faw   fome   of  feven  or   eight  diftin£t  tribes ;    and 
 preached  to  different  nations,  by  diiferent  interpreters.     He 
 was   fometimes  much   dilcouraged,  and  fuuk  in   his   fpirits, 
 through  the  oppofition  that  appeared  in  the   Indians  to  Chri- 
 'ftianity.     At  other  times,  he  was  encouraged  by  the  difpo- 
 fition  that  fome  of  thefe  people  manifefted  to  hear,  and  wil- 
 lingnefs  to  be  inftrufted.     He  here  met  with  fome  that  had 
 formerly  been  his  hearers  at  Kaunaumeek,  and  had  removed 
 hither;  who  faw  and  heard  him  again  with  great  joy.     He 
 fpent  a  fortnight  among  the  Indians  on  this  river  ;  and  pafTed 
 through  confiderable  labours  and  hardlhips,  frequently  lodging' 
 on  the  ground,  and  fometimes  in  the  open  air ;  and  at  length 
 he  fell  extremely  ill,  as  he  v/as  riding  in  the  wildernefs,  be- 
 ing feized  with  an  ague,  followed  with  a  burning  feve;jj,  and 
 extreme  pains  in  his  head  and  bowels,  attended  with  a  great 
 evacuation  of  blood ;  fo  that  he  thought  he  muft  have  peridted 
 in  the  wildernefs.     But  at  Lft  coming  to  an  Indian  trader's 
 hut,  he  got  leave  to  flay  there ;  and  though  without  phyfic 
 or  food  proper  for  him,  it  pleafed   God,  after  about  a  week's 
 dillrcfs,  to  relieve  him  fo  far  that  he  v/as  able  to  ride.     He 
 returned  homewards  from  Juncauta,  an  ifland  far  down  the 
 river  ;  where  was  a  confiderable  number  of  Indians,  who  ap- 
 peared more  free  from  prejudices  againfl:  Chriftianity,  than 
 moll  of  the  other  Indians.     He  arrived  at  the  Forks  of  Dela- 
 ware on  Thurfday,  May  30.  after  having  rode  in  this  journey 
 about  three  hundred  and  forty  miles  *.     He  came  home  in  a 
 
 *  This  is  the  journey  which  he  occafionally  mentions  In  his  printed 
 JoMrnal. 
 
 U  2  very 
 
t$6  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  Jf.  D.  174$. 
 
 vefy  weak  ftate,  and  under  dejeftion  of  mind;  which  was  i 
 great  hindrance  to  him  in  religious  exerciles.  However,  on 
 the  Sabbath,  after  having  preached  to  the  Indians,  he  preach- 
 ed to  ti.e  ivh'te  people,  with  fame  fuccefs,  from  if.  liii.  10. 
 *'  Yet  it  plea  fed  the  Lord  to  bruife  him,"  6c.  fome  being 
 awakened  by  his  preaching.  The  next  day,  he  wasmuch  ex- 
 crcifed  for  want  of  fpiritual  life  and  fervency.] 
 
 Tuefday,  June  4.  Towards  evening,  was  in  diftrefs  for 
 God's  prefence,  and  a  fenfe  of  divine  things :  withdrew  my- 
 felf  to  the  woods,  and  fpcnt  near  an  hour  in  prayer  and  tnc- 
 ditation ;  and  I  think,  the  Lord  had  compaifion  on  me,  and 
 gave  me  fome  fenfe  of  divine  things;  which  was  indeed 
 refrefhing  and  quickening  to  me  :  my  foul  enjoyed  intenfc- 
 nefs  and  freedom  in  prayer,  fo  that  it  grieved  me  to  leave  the 
 place. 
 
 Wednefday,  June  5.  Felt  thirfting  defircs  after  God,  in 
 the  morning.  In  the  evening,  enjoyed  a  precious  feafon  of 
 retirement ;  was  favoured  with  fome  clear  and  fweet  medita- 
 tions upon  a  facred  text;  divine  things  opened  with  ciearnefs 
 and  Certainty,  and  had  a  divine  flamp  upon  them:  my  foul 
 was  alfo  enlarged  and  refrefhed  in  prayer ;  and  I  delighted  to 
 continue  in  the  duty ;  and  was  fweetly  affifted  in  praying  for 
 feilow-Chriftians,  and  my  dear  brethren  in  the  miniftry. 
 BlelFed  be  the  dear  Lord  for  fuch  enjoym.ents.  O  how  fweet 
 and  precious  it  is,  to  have  a  clear  apprehenfion  and  tender 
 fenfe  of  the  myfltiy  of  godlinefs,  of  true  holinefs,  and  like- 
 nefs  to  the  belt  ot  beings !  O  what  a  blcfiednefs  it  is,  to  be 
 as  much  like  God,  as  it  is  pofTible  for  a  creature  to  be  like 
 his  g.fat  Greater!  X,oTd,  give  me  more  of  tky  likenefs ;  "  I 
 "  fiiaii  be   fatiificd,  when  I  av.  tke  with  it." 
 
 Ihuifday,  June  6.  \\  as  engaged,  a  confiderable  pert  of 
 the  day,  in  meditation  and  fivd)  on  divine  fubjefts.  Lnjoycd 
 fom.e  fpecial  freedom,  cieajrnefs,  and  fweetnefs  in  meditation. 
 O  how  refrefliing  it  i^,  to  be  enabled  to  improve  time  well  I 
 
 [The  next  d?.y,  he  went  a  journey  of  near  fifty  miles  to 
 Ncfhaminy,  to  afTift  at  a  facramental  occafion,  to  be  attended 
 at  A  r  Beaty's  meeting-houfe ;  being  invited  thither  by  hira 
 and  his  people.] 
 
 Saturday,  June  8.  Was  exceeding  weak  and  fatigued  with 
 riding  in  the  heat  ycfterday  :  but  being  defired,  I  preached  in 
 tlie  akerpoon,  to  a  crouded  audience,  irom  If.  xl.  !•  "Com. 
 
 "  f^ft 
 
t,t.i^.     Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  1  N  E  R  D.  \^y 
 
 "  fort  ye,  comfort  ye  my  people,  faith  your  God."  God 
 was  ple-ifed  to  give  me  great  freedom,  in  opening  the  forrows 
 of  God's  people,  and  in  fetting  before  them  comforting  con« 
 fiderations.  And,  blefTed  be  the  Lord,  it  was  a  fweet  melt'* 
 ing  feafon  in  the  affembly. 
 
 Lord's  day,  June  9.  Felt  fome  longing  defires  of  the  prc- 
 fence  of  God  to  be  with  his  people  on  the  folemn  occafion  of 
 the  day.  In  the  forenoon^  Mr  Beaty  preached;  and  there 
 appeared  fome  warmth  in  the  affembly.  Afterwards,  I  affiil- 
 ed  in  the  adminiftration  of  the  Lord's  fupper :  and  towards 
 the  clofe  of  it,  I  difcourfed  to  the  multitu  1e  extempore,  with 
 fome  reference  to  that  facred  paffage,  If.  liii.  10.  "  Yet  it 
 "  pleafcd  the  Lord  to  bruife  him."  Here  God  gave  me  great 
 aiuflance  in  addreiling  fmncrs :  and  the  word  was  attended 
 with  amazing  power;  many  fcores,  if  not  hundreds,  in  that 
 great  affembly,  confifling  of  three  or  four  thoufand,  were 
 much  affedled ;  fo  that  there  was  a  "  very  great  mourning, 
 
 *'  like   the   mourning  of  Hadadrimoion." In  the  evening, 
 
 I  could  hardly  lo  )k  any  body  in  the  face,  becaufe  of  the  im- 
 perfeolions  1  faw  in  my  performances  in  the  day  paft. 
 
 Monday,  June  10.  Preached  with  a  good  degree  of  clear- 
 nefs  and  fome  fweet  warmth,  from  Pfal.  xvii.  15.  "  I  fhall 
 be  latifi.-d,  when  I  awake  with  thy  likenefs."  And  bleffed 
 be  God,  there  was  a  great  rolemnity,  and  attention  in  the  z{- 
 fcinSiy,  and  fweet  retrefhment  among  God's  people;  as  was 
 evident  then,  and  afterwards. 
 
 Tuefday^  June  ii.  Spent  the  day  mainly  in  converfation 
 with  dear  Chriftian  friends;  and  enjoyed  fome  fweet  fenfe  of 
 divine  things.  O  how  defirable  it  is,  to  keep  company  with 
 God's  dear  children !  Thefe  are  the  "  excellent  ones  of  the  , 
 "  earth,  in  whom,"  I  can  truly  fay,  "is  all  my  delight."  O 
 what  delight  will  it  afford,  to  meet  them  all  in  a  f\ate  of  per- 
 feftion !   Lord,  prepare  me  for  that  ftate. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  left  Mr  Beaty's,  and  went  to  Maiden- 
 head in  New- Jerfey ;  and  fpent  the  next  fcven  days  in  a  com- 
 fortable ftate  of  m.ind,  vifiting  feveral  minifters  in  thofe 
 parts.] 
 
 Tuefday,  June  i8.  Set  out  from  New-Brunfwick  with  a 
 dcfign  to  vifit  fome  Indians  at  a  place  called  Crofiveekfung  in 
 New- Jerfey,  towards  the  fea  *.     In  the  afternoon,  came  to  a 
 
 place 
 
 f  Hr  Braincrd  having,  when  at  Bofton,    wrote  and  left  with  a 
 
 friend 
 
V5I  T  H  E    L  I  F  E    O  F  J.D,  tji^s- 
 
 place  called  Cranberry y  and  meeting  with  a  ferious  minifter, 
 Mr  Macknight,  I  lodged  there  with  him.  Had  fome  enlarge- 
 ment and  freedom  in  prayer  with  a  number  of  people. 
 
 friend  a  brief  retatitn  of  fadVs  touching  his  labours  with  the  Indians, 
 and  reception  among  them,  during  the  fpace  of  time  between  No- 
 vember 5.  1744.  and  June  19.  1745.  (with  a  yiew  to  conneft  his 
 J^arrative,  at  the  end  of  Mr  Pemberton's  ordination-fermon,  and 
 his  Journal,  in  cafe  they  fliould  ever  be  reprinted),  concludes  the 
 fame  with  this  paflage  :  **  As  my  body  was  very  feeble,  fo  my  mind 
 *'  was  fcarce  ever  fo  much  damped  and  difcouraged  about  the  con- 
 «*  verfion  of  the  Indians,  as  at  this  time.  And  in  this  ftate  of  body 
 **  and  mind  I  made  my  firft  vifit  to  the  Indians  in  New- Jerfey, 
 ««  where  God  was  pleafed  to  difplay  his  power  and  grace  in  the  re» 
 *''  markable  manner  that  I  have  reprefcoted  in  my  printed  Journal.'' 
 
 ?  A  R  T 
 
PART       VII. 
 
 From  his  firft  beginning  to  preach  to  the  In- 
 dians at  Crofweekfung,  till  he  returned  from 
 his  laft  journey  to  Sufquahannjih  ill  with 
 the  confumption,  whereof  he  died. 
 
 fTT7E  are  now  come  to  that  part  of  Mr  Bralncrd's  life, 
 VV    wherein  he  had  his  greatefl  fuccejs,  in  his  labours  for 
 the  good  of  fouls,  and  in  his  particular  bufinefs  as  a  miflion- 
 ary  to  the  Indians.     An  account  of  which,  if  here  publifhed, 
 would  doubtlefs  be   very  entertaining  to  the  reader,  after  he 
 has  feen  by  the  preceding  parts   of  this  account  of  his  life, 
 how  great  and  long-continued  his  defires  for  the  fpiritual  good 
 of  this  fort  of  people  were;  how  he  prayed,  laboured,  and 
 wrcflled,  and   how  much  he  denied  himfelf,  and  fuifered,  to 
 this  end.     After   all   Mr   Braincrd's  agonizing  in  prayer,  and 
 travelling  in  birth,  for  the  converfion  of  Indians,  and   all  the 
 interchanges  of  his  raifed  hopes  and  expeftations,  and  then 
 difappointments  and  difcouragcments  ;  and  after  waiting  in  a 
 way  of  pcrfevcring  prayer,  labour,  and  fufFering,  as  it  were 
 through  a  \on<j^  night;  at  length   the  day  dawns:  "Weeping 
 "  continues  for  a  night,  but  joy  comes  in  the  morning.     He 
 "  went  forth   weeping,  bearing   precious  feed,  and  now  he 
 **  comes  with  rejoicing,  bringing  his  fheaves  with  him."  The 
 defired  even:  is   brought  to  pafs  at  lafl ;  but  at  a  time,  in  a 
 place,  and  up:m  fubjefts,  that  fcarce   ever   entered  into  his 
 heart.     An  account  of  this   v/ould    undoubtedly   now  much 
 gratify  the  Chriftian  reader:  and  it  fhould  have  been  here  in- 
 fcrted,  as  it  Hands  in   his  diary,  had  it  not   been,  that  a  par- 
 ticular account  of  this  glorious  and   wonderful   fuccefs  was. 
 drawn   up  by  Mr  Brainerd  himfclf,  purfuant  to  the  order  of 
 the  honourable  fociety  in  Scotland,  and   publifhed  by  him  in 
 his  lifetime ;  which   account  many  have  in   their  hands ;  and 
 the  iafsiting  it  here  would  too  much  fwell  this  bo^k,  as  was^ 
 
 faid 
 
l6o  T  H  E    L  I  F  E    O  F  J.  D.  1745. 
 
 faid  before  in  the  preface.  However,  I  look  upon  the  want 
 of  this  account  here,  as  a  real  defeft  in  this  hiltory  of  Mr 
 Braiiierd's  life ;  which,  I  would  hope,  thofe  of  rfty  readers, 
 who  are  not  already  poflefled  of  his  public  Journal,  will 
 fupply,  by  procuring  one  of  thofe  books,  that  they  may  not 
 be  without  that  which  in  fome  rcfpedls  is  the  moft  remark- 
 able, and  to  a  Chriftian  mind  would  be  the  moft  pleafant 
 part  of  the  whole  ftory.  That  the  reader  who  is  turnifhed 
 ■with  one  of  thofe  books,  may  know  the  place  where  the  de- 
 feats of  this  hiftjry  arc  to  be  fupplied  from  thence,  I  ihall 
 either  exprefsly  oblerve  it  as  I  go  along,  or  clfe  make  a  dafli 
 
 or  ftroke  thus ;   which  when  the  reader  finds  in  this  7th 
 
 part  of  this  hiftory,  he  is  to  underftand  by  it,  that  in  that 
 place  fomething  in  Mr  Brainerd's  diary,  worth  obferving,  is 
 left  out,  becaufe  the  fame  for  fubflance  was  publifhed  before 
 in  his  printed  Journal  *.] 
 
 "Wednefday,  June  19.  i/45-  Rode  to  the  Indians  at  Crof- 
 weekfung:  found  few  at  home;  difpourfed  to  them  however, 
 and  obferved  them  very  ferious  and  attentive.  At  night  I  was 
 extremely  worn  out,  and  fcarce  able  to  walk  or  fit  up.  Oh, 
 how  tire  Tome  is  earth  !  how  dull  the  body  I 
 
 Thurfday,  Juae  20.  Towards  night,  preached  to  the  In- 
 dians again  ;  and  had  more  hearers  than  before.  In  the  even- 
 ing, enjoyed  fome  peace  and  fereniiy  of  mind,  fome  com- 
 pofure  and  comfort  in  prayer  alone  ;  and  was  enabled  to  lift 
 up  my  head  with  fome  degree  of  joy,  under  an  apprehcnfion 
 that  my  redemption  draws  nigh.  Oh,  blefTed  be  God,  that 
 there  remains  a  reft  to  his  poor  weary  people  ! 
 
 Friday,  June  21.  Rode  to  Freehold,  to  fee  Mr  William 
 Tennent ;  and  fpent  the  day  comfortably  with  him.  My 
 finking  fpirits  were  a  little  raifed  and  cncjuraged  ;  and  I  felt 
 ray  foul  breathing  after  God,  in  the  midfl  of  Chriflian  con- 
 Yerfation.  And  in  the  evening,  was  refrefhed  in  fecret  prayer ; 
 faw  myfelf  a  poor  worthlefs  creature,  without  wifdom  to  di- 
 reft,  or  flrcngth  to  help  myfelf.  Oh,  blefled  be  God,  that  lays 
 me  under  a  happy,  a  bleffcd  neceffity  of  living  upon  bimfelf ! 
 
 Saturday,  June  22.  About  noon,  rode  to  the  Indians  again ; 
 and  near  night,  preached  to  them.  Found  my  body  much 
 flrengthened,  and  v/as  enabled  to  fpeak  with  abundant  plain- 
 nefs  and  warmth.     And  the  power  of  God  evidently  attended 
 
 *  This  defeft  in  the  former  edition  of  Mr  Brainerd's  life,  here 
 mentioned  by  Mr  Edwards,  is  fupphed  in  this,  by  anntxing  to  it 
 the  Journal  here  referred  to, 
 
 the 
 
^t.2%.     Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D,  i6j 
 
 the  word;  fo  that  fundry  perfons  were  brought  under  grea 
 concern  for  their  fouls,  and  made  to  fhed  jxiany  tears,  and  to 
 "wifti  for  Chrift  to  fave  them.  My  foul  was  much  retrelhed, 
 and  quickened  in  my  work  ;  and  I  could  not  but  fpend  m.uch 
 time  with  them,  in  order  to  open  both  their  niiitry  and  re- 
 medy. This  was  indeed  a  fweet  aiiernoon  to  me.  While 
 riding,  before  I  came  to  the  Indians,  my  fpirits  were  refrclh- 
 cd,  and  my  foul  enabled  to  cry  to  God  almoft  incelTantly,  tor 
 many  miles  together.  In  the  evening  alfo  i  found  the  cun- 
 folations  of  God  were  not  fmall :  I  was  then  willing  to  live, 
 and  in  fome  refpedls  defirou?  of  it,  that  I  might  do  fomcthing 
 for  the  dear  kingdom  of  Chrift  ;  and  yet  death  appeared  plea- 
 fant:  fo  that  I  was  in  fome  raeafure  in  a  ftrait  between  two, 
 haying  a  defire  to  depart.  I  am  often  weaiy  of  this  world, 
 and  want  to  leave  it  on  that  account;  but  it  is  defirabie  to 
 be  drawn,  rather  than  driven  out  of  it. 
 
 [In  the  four  next  days  is  nothing  remarkable  in  his  diary, 
 but  what  is  in  his  public  Journal.] 
 
 Thurfday,  June  27. My  foul  rejoiced  to  find,  that  Gcd 
 
 enabled  me  to  be  faithful,  and  that  he  v/as  pleaicd  to  awakerj 
 thefe  poor  Indians  by  my  means.  O  how  heart-reviving, 
 and  foui-refrefhing  is  it  to  me  to  fee  the  fruit  of  my  labours  ! 
 
 Friday,  June  ■:.%. In  the  evening,  my  foul  was  re- 
 vived, and  my  heart  lifted  up  to  God  in  prayer,  for  my 
 poor  Indians,  myfelf,  and  friends,  and  the  dt-ar  church  of 
 God.  And  O  how  refrefhing,  huw  fv^cct  was  this!  Blefs 
 the  Lord,  O  ray  foul,  and  forget  net  his  goodnefs  and  tender 
 mercy. 
 
 Saturday,  June  29.  Preached  twice  to  the  Indians ;  and 
 could  not  but  wonder  at  their  feriouineL,  and  the  ftii^lnefs 
 of  their  attention. — BltfTed  be  Gcd  that  has  inclined  their 
 hearts  to  hear.  And  O  how  refiefhing  it  is  to  me,  ti-  Ice 
 them  attend  with  fuch  uncommon  diligence  and  aff-.cfii'n, 
 with  tears  in  their  eyes,  and  concern  in  their  hearts!  In  the 
 evening,  could  not  but  Hit  up  my  heart  to  God  in  pia^rr, 
 while  riding  to  my  lodgings  ;  and  blelTed  be  his  name,  h;id 
 cilTiflance  and  freedom.  O  how  much  better  than  life  is  the 
 prefence  of  God! 
 
 [His  diary  gives  an  account  of  nothing  remarkable  on  the 
 two  next  days,  bcfides  what  is  in  his  public  Journal;  cxce't- 
 ing  his  heart's  being  lifted  up  with  thanktulncl?,  rejoicing  in 
 
 ^      "  X  Tucfday/ 
 
i62  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F  J.  D.  174$. 
 
 Tucfday,  July  2.  Rode  from  the  Indians  to  Brunfwick, 
 near  forty  miles,  and  lodged  there.  Felt  my  heart  drawn  out 
 after  God  in  prayer,  almoft  all  the  forenoon  ;  efpecially  while 
 riding.  And  in  the  evening,  could  not  help  crying  to  Go-i 
 for  thofe  poor  Indians;  and  after  I  went  to  bed,  my  heart 
 contln.ied  to  go  out  to  God  for  them,  till  I  dropped  afleep.  O 
 bleffed  be  God  that  I  may  pray ! 
 
 [He  was  fo  beat  out  by  conftant  preaching  to  thcfe  Indians, 
 yielding  to  their  earneft  and  importunate  defires,  that  he  found 
 it  neccffary  to  give  hirafelf  fome  relaxation.  He  fpent  there- 
 fore about  a  week  in  New-Jerfey,  after  he  left  thefe  Indians, 
 vifiting  feveral  minvflers,  and  performing  fome  neceffary  bu- 
 fmefs,  before  he  went  to  the  Forks  of  Delaware.  And 
 though  he  was  very  weak  ift  body,  yet  he  feems  to  have  been 
 flrong  in  fplrit.  On  Friday,  July  12.  he  arrived  at  his  own 
 houfe  in  the  Forks  of  Delaware ;  continuing  flill  free  from 
 melancholy ;  from  day  to  day,  enjoying  freedom,  alfiftance, 
 and  refrefiirncnt  in  the  inner  man.  But  on  Wednefday,  the 
 next  week,  he  fcems  to  have  had  fome  melancholy  thoughts 
 about  his  doing  fo  little  for  God,  being  fo  much  hindered  by 
 ■weaknefs  of  body.] 
 
 Thurfday,  July  18.  Longed  to  fpend  the  little  inch  of 
 time  I  have  in  the  world  more  for  God.  Felt  a  fpirit  of 
 ferioufnefs,  tenderneis,  Iweetnefs,  and  devotion,  and  wi(hed 
 to  fpend  the  whole  night  in  prayer  and  communion  with 
 God. 
 
 Fridaj'-,  July  1 9.  In  the  evening,  walked  abroad  for  prayer  and 
 meditation,  and  enjoyed  compofure  and  freedom  in  thefe  fweet 
 exercifes ;  efpecially  in  meditation  on  Rev.  iii.  12.  "  Him  that 
 "  overcomcth,  v/ill  I  make  a  pillar  in  the  temple  of  my  God," 
 6-c.  This  was  then  a  delightful  theme  to  me,  and  it  refrefhed 
 my  foul  to  dv/ell  upon  it.  Oh,  when  ihall  I  go  no  more  out 
 from  the  ferviee  and  enjoyment  of  the  dear  Lord!  Lord, 
 hafien  the  blelfed  day. 
 
 [Within  the  fpace  of  the  next  fix  days,  he  fpeaks  of  much 
 inward  rcfreih.^.ent  and  enlargement,  from  time  to  time.J 
 
 Friday,  July  26.  In  the  evening,  God  was  pleafed  to  help 
 me  in  prayer,  beyond  what  I  have  experienced  for  fome  time ; 
 efpecially  my  foul  was  dravvn  out  for  the  enlargement  of 
 Chrift's  kingdom,  and  for  the  converfion  of  my  poor  people  : 
 and  ray  foul  relied  en  God  for  the  accompliihment  of  that 
 
 great 
 
/B/.  28.      Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  163 
 
 great  work.  Oh,  how  fweet  were  the  thoughts  of  death  to 
 mc  at  this  time  I  Oh,  how  I  longed  to  be  with  Chrifl,  to  be 
 employed  in  the  glorious  work  of  angeis,  and  with  an  angel's 
 freedom,  vigour,  and  delight!  And  yet  how  willing  was  i  to 
 Hay  a  while  on  earth,  that  1  might  do  fomething,  if  the  Lord 
 pleafed,  for  his  intcreft  in  the  world!  My  Icul,  my  very 
 foul,  longed  for  the  ingathering  of  the  poor  Heathen ;  and  I 
 cried  to  God  for  them  mofl:  willingly  and  heartily ;  and  yet 
 becaufe  I  could  not  but  cry.  This  was  a  fweet  feafon  ;  for  I 
 had  fome  lively  tafte  of  heaven,  and  a  temper  of  mind  fuited 
 in  fome  meafure  to  the  employments  and  entertainments  of  it. 
 My  foul  was  grieved  to  leave  the  place ;  but  my  body  was 
 weak  and  worn  out,  and  it  was  near  nine  o'clock.  Oh,  I 
 longed  that  the  remaining  part  of  my  life  might  be  filled  up 
 with  more  fervency  and  activity  in  the  things  of  God !  Oh 
 the  inward  peace,  compofure,  and  God-like  fercnity  of  fucli 
 a  frame!  heaven  muft:  needs  differ  from  this  only  in  degree, 
 and  not  in  kind.     "  Lord,  ever  give  me  this  bread  of  life." 
 
 [Much  of  this  frame  feemed  to  continue  the  next  day.] 
 
 Lord's  da)',  July  28.  In  the  evening,  my  foul  was  melted, 
 and  my  heart  broken,  with  a  fenfe  of  part  barrennefs  and 
 <deadnefs :  and  Oh,  how  I  then  longed  to  live  to  God,  and 
 bring  forth  much  fruit  to  his  glory  I 
 
 Monday,  July  29.  Was  much  exercifed  with  a  fenfe  of 
 vilenefs,  with  guilt  and  fhame  before  God. 
 
 [For  other  things  remarkable,  while  he  was  this  time  at 
 the  Forks  of  Delaware,  the  reader  m.ufl  be  refered  to  his  public 
 Journal.  As  particularly  for  his  labours  and  fuccefs  there  a- 
 mong  the  Indians. 
 
 On  Wednefday,  July  31.  He  fet  out  on  his  return  to  Crof- 
 weekfung,  and  arrived  there  the  next  day.  In  his  way  thi- 
 ther, he  had  longing  dcfires  that  he  might  come  to  the  In- 
 dians there,  in  the  "  fulnefs  of  the  bleffmg  of  the  gofpel  of 
 "  Chrift;"  attended  with  a  fenfe  of  his  own  great  weaknefs, 
 dependence,  and  worthleffnefs.] 
 
 Friday,  Auguft  2.  In  the  evening  I  retired,  and  my  foul 
 was  drawn  out  in  prayer  to  God;  cfpecially  for  my  poor 
 people,  to  whom  I  had  fent  word  that  they  might  gather  to- 
 gether, that  I  might  preach  to  them  the  next  day.  I  was 
 much  enlarged  in  praying  for  their  faving  convei  fion ;  and 
 fcarce  ever  found  my  defues  of  any  thing  of  this  nature  fo 
 
 X  2  fenfibly 
 
i64  T  *H  E     L  I  F  E     O  r  /..  7).  1745. 
 
 fcnfibly  and  clearly  (to  my  own  fat^sfaftion)  difinterefted,  and 
 free  jro:;i  iclfini  views.  It  feemed  to  me,  Ihad  no  care,  or 
 'hardlv  any  deiire  to  be  the  inftiurnent  of  fo  glorious  a  work, 
 as  I  wifhcd  and  prayed  for  among  the  Jndians :  if  the  blelTed 
 v/:)rk  tnijrht  be  accomplifhcd  to  the  honour  of  God,  and  the 
 enlargement  of  the  dear  Redeemer's  kingdom,  this  was  all  my 
 dciire  and  care;  and  for  this  mercy  I  hoped,  but  with  trem- 
 bliiig;  for  I  felt  what  Job  exprefles,  chap.  ix.  16.  My  rifing 
 h>>pcs,  refpcfting  the  converllon  of  the  Indians,  have  been  fo 
 often  dafhed,  that  my  fpirit  is  as  it  were  broken,  and  courage 
 wafted,  and  I  hardly  dare  hope. 
 
 [Concerning  his  labours  and  marvellous  fuccefs  amongft 
 the  Indians,  for  the  fallowing  ten  days,  let  the  reader  lee 
 his  public  Journal.  The  things  worthy  of  note  in  his  diary ^ 
 not  there  publilhed,  are  his  earneft  and  importunate  prayers 
 for  the  Indians,  and  the  travail  'jf  his  foul  for  them  from  day 
 to  day  ;  and  his  great  refrefhment  and  joy  in  beholding  the 
 wonderful  mercy  of  God,  and  the  glorious  manifeflations  of 
 his  power  and  grace  in  his  work  among  them  ;  and  his  ardent 
 thank fgivings  to  God;  his  heart's  rejoicing  in  Chrift,  as  King 
 of  his  church,  and  King  of  his  foul;  in  particular,  at  the  fa- 
 ci  anient  of  the  Lord's  fupper  at  Mr  Macknight's  mceting- 
 hvjute ;  a  fenfe  of  his  own  exceeding  unworthinefs,  which 
 fometimes  was  attended  with  dejection  and  melancholy.] 
 
 Monday,  Auguft   19. Near  noon,  I  rode  to  Freehold, 
 
 and  preached  to  a  confiderable  alTembly,  from  Matth.  v.  3. 
 It  pleaied  God  to  leave  me  to  be  very  dry  and  barren;  fo  that 
 I  do  n-.t  remember  to  have  been  fo  ftraitened  for  a  whole 
 twelvemonth  pafl.  God  i^  jufl,  and  he  has  made  my  foul 
 acquipfce  in  bis  willin  this  regard.  It  is  contrary  to  flejb 
 and  blood,  to  be  cut  off  from  all  freedom,  in  a  brge  auditory, 
 V.  here  their  expcflations  are  mvch  railed;  but  fo  it  was  with 
 me ;  and  God  helped  me  to  lay  y^nieyj  to  it ;  "  Good  is  the 
 **  v/ill  of  the  Lord."  In  the  evening-  I  felt  quiet  and  com- 
 pofed,  and  had  freedom  and  comfort  in  fecret  prayer. 
 
 7  ucfday,  Auguft  20.  Was  compofed  and  comfortable,  ftill 
 in  a  rehgned  frame..  Travelled  from  Mr  Tennent's  in  Free- 
 hi/td  to  Llilab?th-Town.  Wrs  refreflied  to  fee  friends,  and 
 relate  to  them  what  God  had  done,  and  was  flill  doing  among 
 my  poor  people.  - 
 
 VVcdnefday,  Auguft  21.  Spent  the  forenoon  in  convcrfation 
 with  ^;r  Dickinfon,  contriving  fomething  for  the  fettlement 
 of  tiie  Indians  together  in  a  body,  that  they  might  be  under 
 
 -     ,  '  bettff 
 
Mt.iB.      Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  iS$ 
 
 better  advantages  for  inftruftion.  In  the  afternoon,  fpent 
 ti.ue  agreeably  with  other  friends;  wrote  to  ray  brother  at 
 college :  but  was  grieved  that  time  Aid  away,  while  I  did  fo 
 little  for  God. 
 
 Friday,  Auguft  23.  In  the  morninjg,  was  very  weak;  but 
 favoured  with  fomc  freedom  and  Iweetnefs  in  prayer ;  was 
 corapofcd  and  comfortable  in  mind.  Aher  noon,  rode  to 
 Cfofweekfung  to  my  poor  people. 
 
 Saturday,  Auguft  24. Had  compofure  and  peace,  while 
 
 riding  from  the  Indians  to  my  lodgings :  was  enabled  to  pour 
 cmt  my  foul  to  God  for  dear  friends  in  New- England.  Felt 
 3.  fweet  tender  frame  of  fpirit :  my  foul  was  compofed  and 
 refre(hed  in  God.  Had  likewife  freedom  and  earneftnefs  in 
 praying  for  my  dear  people :  blefled  be  God.  "  O  the  peace 
 **  of  God  that  pafTeth  all  underftanding !"  it  is  impoffible  to 
 defcribe  the  fweet  peace  of  confcience,  and  tendernefs  of  foul, 
 i  then  enjoyed.     O  the  bleffed  foretaftes  of  hcavea! 
 
 Lord's  day,  Auguft  25. 1   rode  to  my  lodgings  in  the 
 
 ■evening,  bleffing  the  Lord  for  his  gracious  villtatioa  of  the  In* 
 dians,  and  the  foul-rtfreftiing  things  I  had  feen  the  day  palt 
 amongft  them,  and  praying  that  God  would  ftill  carry  on  his 
 divine  work  among  them. 
 
 Monday,  Auguft  26. 1  went  from  the  Indians  to  my 
 
 lodgings,  rejoicing  for  the  goodnefs  of  God  to  my  poor 
 people;  and  enjoyed  freedom  of  foul  in  prayer,  and  other 
 duties,  in  the  evening.     Blefs  the  Lord,  O  my  foul. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  Cet  out  on  a  jourrey  towards  the  Forks 
 of  Delaware,  defigning  to  go  from  thence  to  Sufquahannah, 
 before  he  returned  to  Crofweekfung.  It  was  five  days  from 
 his  departure  from  Crofweekfung,  before  he  reached  the 
 Forks,  going  round  by  the  way  ot  Philadelphia,  and  waiting 
 on  the  governor  of  Penfylvania,  to  get  a  recommendation 
 from  him  to  the  chiefs  of  the  Indians  ;  which  he  obtained. 
 He  fpeaks  of  much  comfort  and  fpiritual  refrefliment  in 
 this  journey;  and  alfo  a  fenfe  of  his  exceeding  unworthi- 
 nefs,  thinking  himfelf  the  mean^ft  creature  that  ever  li- 
 ved.] 
 
 Lord's  day,    September    i.    [At    the    Forks    of    Dela- 
 
 »vare] God  gave  me   the  Spirit  of  prayer,  and  it  was   a 
 
 bleffed  feafon  in  that  refpeft.  My  foul  cried  to  God  for  mcr- 
 cy,  in  an  affeftionate  manner.  In  the  evening  alfo  my  Ibul 
 jTfjoiced  in  God,  • 
 
 [His 
 
i66  T  H  E    L  I  P  E     O  F  ji.  D.  1745. 
 
 [His  private  diary  has  nothing  remarkable,  for  the  two 
 «ext  days,  but  what  is  in  his  public  Journal.] 
 
 Wednefday,  September  4.  Rode  fifteen  miles  to  an  Irifti 
 fettlement,  and  preached  there  from  Luke  xiv.  22.  "  And  yet 
 *'  there  is  room."  God  was  pleafed  to  afford  me  feme  ten- 
 ^ernefs  and  enlargement  in  the  firll  prayer,  and  much  free- 
 dom, as  well  as  warmth,  in  fermon.  There  were  many  tears 
 in  the  aflembly :  the  people  of  God  feemed  to  melt,  and 
 others  to  be  in  fome  meafure  awakened.  BlefTed  be  the 
 Lord,  that  lets  me  fee  his  work  going  on  in  one  place  and 
 -another. 
 
 [The  account  for  Thurfday  is  the  fame  for  fubftance  as  in 
 his  public  Journal.] 
 
 Friday,  September  6.  Enjoyed  fome  freedom  and  intenfe- 
 nefs  of  mind  in  prayer  alone ;  and  longed  to  have  my  foul 
 more  warmed  with  divine  and  heavenly  things.  Was  fome- 
 •what  melancholy  towards  night,  and  longed  to  die  and  quit 
 a  fcene  of  lin  and  darknefs  ;  but  "was  a  little  fupportcd  in 
 prayer. 
 
 [This  melancholy  continued  the  next  day.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  September  8. In   the  evening,   God  was 
 
 pleafed  to  enlarge  me  in  prayer,  and  give  me  freedom  at  the 
 throne  of  grace :  I  cried  to  God  for  the  enlargement  of  his 
 kingdom  in  the  world,  and  in  particular  among  my  dear 
 people ;  was  alfo  enabled  to  pray  for  many  dear  miniilers 
 of  my  acquaintance,  both  in  thefe  parts,  and  in  New- Eng- 
 land; and  alfo  for  other  dear  friends  in  New- England.  And 
 my  foul  was  fo  engaged  and  enlarged  in  that  fweet  exercife, 
 that  I  fpentnear  an  hour  in  it,  and  knew  not  how  to  leave 
 the  mercy-feat.  Oh,  how  1  delighted  to  pray  and  cry  to 
 God  I  I  faw,  God  was  both  able  and  willing  to  do  all  that  I 
 defired,  for  myfelf  and  friends,  and  his  church  in  general.  I 
 was  likewife  much  enlarged  and  affifted  in  family-prayer. 
 And  afterwards,  when  I  was  juft  going  to  bed,  God  help- 
 ed me  to  renew  my  petitions  v/ith  ardency  and  freedom. 
 Oh,  it  was  to  me  a  blefled  evening  of  prayer!  Blefs  the  Lord, 
 O  my  foul. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  fet  out  from  the  Forks  of  Delaware  to 
 go  to  Sufquahannah.     And  on  the  fifth  day  of  his  journey, 
 
 .  he 
 
jet.7t.       Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E R  D.  167 
 
 he  arrived  at  Shaumoking,  a  large  Indian  town  on  Sufqua- 
 hannah  river.  He  performed  the  journey  under  a  confider- 
 able  degree  of  melancholy,  occafioned  at  fii  It  by  his  hearing 
 that  the  Moravians  were  gone  before  him  to  the  Sulquahannah- 
 Indians.] 
 
 Saturday,    September    14.    [At    Shaumoking] -Tn   the 
 
 evening,  my  foul  was  enlarged  and  fweetly  engaged  in  prayer ; 
 efpecialiy,  that  God  would  fet  up  his  kingdom  in  this  place, 
 where  the  devil  now  reigns  in  the  moft  eminent  manner- 
 And  I  was  enabled  to  a  Ik  this  for  God,  for  his  glory,  and 
 bccaufe  I  longed  for  the  enlargement  of  his  kingdom,  to  the 
 honour  of  his  dear  name.  I  could  appeal  to  God  with  the 
 greatcft  freedom,  that  he  knew  it  was  his  dear  caufe,  and  not 
 my  own,  that  engaged  my  heart :  and  my  foul  cried,  "  Lord, 
 **  fet  up  thy  kingdom,  for  thine  own  glory.  Glorify  thyfelf; 
 *'  and  I  fhall  rejoice.  Get  honour  to  thy  blefTed  name ;  and 
 **  this  is  all  1  defire.  Do  with  me  juft  what  thou  wilt.  BlefTed 
 "  be  thy  name  for  ever,  that  thou  art  God,  and  that  thou 
 **  wilt  glorify  thyfelf.  O  that  the  whole  world  might  glorify 
 ''  thee  !  O  let  thefe  poor  people  be  brought  to  know  thee, 
 *'  and  love  thee,  for  the  glory  of  thy  dear  ever-bleffed  name!'* 
 I  could  not  but  hope,  that  God  would  bring  in  thefe  mifer- 
 able,  wicked  Indians ;  though  there  appeared  little  human 
 probability  of  it ;  for  they  were  then  dancing  and  revelling, 
 as  if  pofTe/rcd  by  the  devil.  But  yet  I  hoped,  though  againfi 
 hope,  that  God  would  be  glorified,  that  God's  name  would 
 be  glorified  by  thefe  poor  Indians.  I  continued  long  in 
 prayer  and  praife  to  God;  and  had  great  freedom,  enlarge- 
 ment, and  fweetnefs,  remembering  dear  friends  in  New-Eng- 
 land, as  well  as  the  people  of  my  charge.  Was  entirely 
 free  from  that  dejection  of  fpirit  with  which  I  am  frequently 
 excrcifed.     Bleifed  be  God  ! ' 
 
 [^His  diary  from  this  time  to  September  22.  (the  lafl:  day  of 
 his  continuance  among  the  Indians  at  Sufquahannah)  is  not 
 legible,  by  reafon  of  the  badnefs  of  the  ink.  It  was  probably- 
 written  with  the  juice  of  fome  berries  found  in  the  woods, 
 having  no  other  ink  in  that  wildernefs.  So  that  for  this  fpacc 
 of  time  the  reader  muil  be  wholly  referred  to  his  public 
 Journal. 
 
 On  Monday,  September  23.  He  left  the  Indians,  in  order 
 to  his  return  to  the  Forks  of  Delaware,  in  a  very  weak  ftate 
 of  body,  and  under  dejeftion  of  mind,  which  continued  the 
 two  firil  days  of  his  journey.] 
 
 Wednefday» 
 
i6a  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     a  F  jl.D.  1745. 
 
 Wednefday,  September  25.  Rode  ftill  homeward.  In  :hd 
 forenoon,  enjoyed  treedom  and  intenlentls  of  mind  in  me- 
 ditation on  Job  xlii.  3.  6.  "  I  have  heard  of  thee  b>  the  hear- 
 "  ing  of  the  ear;  but  now  mine  eye  feeth  thee:  wherefore  I 
 "  abhor  myfelf,  and  repent  in  duft  and  afhes."  I'hc  Lord 
 gave  me  clearnefs  to  penetrate  into  the  iweet  truths  con- 
 tained in  that  text.  It  v/as  a  comfortable  and  fvveet  fcafon  to 
 me. 
 
 Thurfday,  September  26.  Wa5  ftill  much  difordercd  in 
 body,  and  able  to  ride  but  flowly.  Continued  my  journey 
 however.  Near  night,  arrived  at  the  Irifh  fcttlemert,  about 
 fifteen  miles  from  mine  own  houfe.  This  day,  while  riding, 
 I  was  much  exercifed  with  a  fenfe  of  my  barrennels ;  and 
 verily  thought,  there  was  no  creature  that  had  any  true  grace, 
 but  what  was  more  fpiritual  and  fruitful  than  I ;  I  could  not 
 think  that  any  of  God's  children  made  fo  poor  a  hand  of  living. 
 ,to  God  as  I. 
 
 Friday,  September  27.  Spent  confiderable  time,  in  the 
 morning,  in  prayer  and  praife  to  God.  My  mind  was  fome- 
 what  intenfe  in  the  duty,  and  my  heart  in  lome  degree  warm- 
 ed with  a  fenfe  of  divine  things :  my  foul  was  melted,  to 
 think,  that  "  God  had  accounted  me  faithful,  putting  me 
 "  into  the  miniftry,"  notwithftanding  all  my  barrennefs  and 
 deadnefs.  My  foul  was  alfo  in  {o\i-\c  meafure  enlarged  in 
 prayer  for  the  dear  people  of  my  charge,  as  well  as  for  othcf 
 dear  friends.  In  the  afternoon,  vifited  fomc  Chriftian  friends^ 
 and  fpent  the  time,  I  think,  profiiably  :  my  heart  was  warm- 
 ed, and  more  engaged  in  the  things  of  God.  In  the  evening, 
 I  enjoyed  enlargement,  warmth,  and  comfort  in  prayer:  my 
 foul  relied  on  God  for  alTiftance  and  grace  to  enable  me 
 to  do  fomething  in  his  caufe :  my  heart  was  drawn  out  in 
 thankfulnefs  to  God  for  what  he  had  done  for  his  own  glory 
 among  my  poor  people  of  late :  and  I  felt  encouraged  to  prOf 
 cecd  in  his  work,  being  pcrfuaded  of  his  power,  and  hoping 
 his  arin  might  be  further  revealed,  for  the  enlargement  of  his 
 dear  kingdom :  and  my  foul  "  rejoiced  in  hope  of  the  glory 
 "  of  God,''  in  hope  of  the  advancement  of  his  declarative 
 glory  in  the  world,  as  well  as  of  enjoying  him  in  a  world  of 
 glory.     Oh,  bleffed  be  God,  the  living  God,  for  ever  ! 
 
 [He  continued  in  this  comfortable,  fwcet  frame  of  mind, 
 the  two  next  days.  On  the  day  following,  he  went  to  his 
 own  houfe,  in  the  Forks  of  Delaware,  and  continued  ftill  is 
 the  fame  frame.     The  next  day,  which  was   Tuefday,  he  *^i- 
 
 fitcd  his  Indians. Wednefday  he  fpent   moftly  in  writirig 
 
 the 
 
Mf'tn.       M  R    D  A  V  I  D     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  165 
 
 the  meditations  he  had  had  in  his  late  journey  to  Sufquahannahi 
 On  Thurfday,  he  left  the  Forks  of  Delaware,  and  travelled 
 tovvards  Crjfweekfung,  where  he  arrived  on  Saturday,  (Oc- 
 tober 5.)  and  continued  from  day  to  day  in  a  comf)r table 
 ftale  of  mind.  There  is  nothing  material  in  his  d;^ry  foi* 
 this  day  and  the  next,  but  what  is  in  his  printed  journal.] 
 
 Monday,  Od^ober  7.  Being  called  by  the  church  and  people 
 •f  Eafl:- Hampton  on  Long-llland,  as  a  member  of  a  coun* 
 «il,  to  aflift  and  advife  in  aiFairs  of  difficulty  in  that  church, 
 I  let  out  on  my  journey  this  morning,  before  it  was  well 
 light,  and  travelled  to  Elifabeth-Town,  and  there  lod- 
 ged. Enjoyed  fome  comfort  on  the  road,  in  converfation 
 "with  Mr  William  Tcnnent,  who  was  fent  for  on  the  fame 
 (luilnefs. 
 
 [He  profccuted  his  journey  with  the  other  minifbcrs  that 
 inhere  fent  for;  and  did  not  return  till  Odlober  24.  While  he 
 was  at  Eali- Hampton,  the  importance  of  the  bufinefs  that 
 the  council  were  come  upon,  lay  with  fuch  weight  on  his 
 jnind,  and  he  was  fo  concerned  for  the  intereft  of  religion  in 
 that  place,  that  he  fiept  but  little  for  feveral  nights  fuccefllvc- 
 ly.  In  his  way  to  and  from  Ealt-Hampton,  he  had  feveral 
 feafons  of  fweet  refreftiment,  wherein  his  foul  was  enlarged 
 and  comforted  with  divine  confolations,  in  fccret  retirement; 
 and  he  had  fpecial  afliftance  in  public  minifterial  performances 
 in  the  houfe  of  God ;  and  yet,  at  the  fame  time,  a  fenfe  of 
 oxtremc  vilencfs  and  unprofitablenefs.  He  from  time  to  time 
 fpeaks  of  foul-refrefhment  and  comfort  in  converfation  with 
 the  minifters  that  travelled  with  him  ;  and  feems  to  have  little 
 or  nothing  of  melancholy,  till  he  came  to  the  weft-end  of 
 Long-Ifland,  in  his  return.  After  that,  he  was  oppref;ed 
 with   dejedtion   and   gloominefs   of  mind,    for   feveral  days 
 
 together. For  an  account  of  the   four   firft  days  after  his 
 
 return  from  his  journey,  I  refer  the  reader  to  his  public 
 Journal.] 
 
 Monday,    Oflober  22. Had  an  evening  of  fweet  re- 
 
 frefhing  ;  my  thoughts  were  ralfed  to  a  bleffjd  eternity  ;  my 
 foul  was  melted  with  delires  of  perfect  holinefs,  and  perfectly 
 glorifying  God. 
 
 Tuefday,  Oclober  29.  About  noon,  rode  and  viewed  the 
 Indian  lands  at  Cranberry :  was  much  deje6>ed,  and  greatly 
 perplexed  in  mind ;  knev/  not  how  to  fee  any  body  again,  my 
 n>yl  was  fo  funk  within  me,     Oh  that  thefe  trials  m'jbt  make 
 
 Y  rne 
 
173  THE     LIFE     OF  ^.2>.  1745. 
 
 me  more  humble  and  holy.  Oh  that  God  would  keep  me 
 from  giving  way  to  fmful  dejection,  -which  may  hinder  my 
 ulefulnefs. 
 
 Wcdnefday,  October  30.  My  foul  was  rcfrcflied  with  a 
 view  of  the  continuance  of  God's  bleffed  work  among  the 
 Indians. 
 
 Thurfday,  O(fi:ober3i.  Spent  mofl  of  the  day  in  writing : 
 enjoyed  not  much  fpiritual  comfort;  but  was  not  fo  much 
 funk  with  melancholy  as  at  Tome  other  times. 
 
 [Friday,  November  1.  See  the  public  Journal.] 
 
 Saturday,  November  2.  Spent  the  day  with  the  Indians, 
 and  wrote  fome  things  of  importance  ;  and  longed  to  do  more 
 for  God,  than  I  did,  or  could  do  in  this  prefent  feeble  and 
 
 imperfeft  Rate. 
 
 [November  3  and  4.  See  the  public  Journal. 
 
 Tuefda)^,  November  5.  He  left  the  Indians,  and  fpent  the 
 remaining  part  of  this  week  in  travelling  to  various  parts  of 
 >»ew-Jerfcy,  in  order  to  get  a  colle^ion  for  the  ufe  of  the  In- 
 dians, and  to  obtain  a  fchoolniafier  to  inftruft  them.  And 
 in  the  mean  time,  he  fpeaks  of  very  fwcet  refreftiment  and 
 entertainment  with  Chriflian  friends,  and  of  his  being  fweetly 
 employed,  while  riding,  in  meditation  on  divine  fubjefts ;  his 
 heart's  being  enlarged,  his  mind  clear,  his  fpirit  refrefhed 
 with  divine  truths,  and  his  "heart's  burning  within  him, 
 *'  while  he  went  by  the  way,  and  the  Lord  opened  to  him  the 
 "  fcriptures."] 
 
 Lord's  day,  November  10.  [At  Elifabeth-Town]  "Was 
 comfortable  in  the  morning,  both  in  body  and  mind  ;  preached 
 m  the  forenoon  from  2  Cor.  v.  20.  God  was  pleafed  to  give 
 me  freedom  and  fervency  in  my  difcourfe ;  and  the  prefence 
 of  God  feemed  to  be  in  the  afiembly ;  numbers  were  affefted, 
 and  there  were  many  tears  among  them.  In  the  afternoon, 
 preached  from  Luke  xiv.  22.  "  And  yet  there  is  room." 
 Was  favoured  with  divine  affiflance  in  the  firft  prayer,  and 
 poured  out  my  foul  to  God  with  a  filial  temper  of  mind ;  the 
 living  God  alio  aflifled  me  in  fermon. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  went  to  New-Town  on  Long-Ifland,  to 
 a  meeting  of  the  Prtftytery.  He  fpeaks  of  fome  fweet  medi- 
 tations he  had  while  there,  on  "  Chrift's  delivering  up  the 
 "  kingdom  to  the   Father j"  and  of  his  foul's  being  much., 
 
 refrefhed 
 
^t.2t.     Mr    DAVID     BRAINERD.  171 
 
 rcfrefhed  and  warmed  with  the  confideration  of  that  blifsful 
 day.] 
 
 Friday,  "November  15.  Could  not  crofs  the  ferry  by  reafon 
 pf  the  violdn6<  of  the  wind  ;  nor  could  I  enjoy  any  place  of 
 retirement  at  the  ferry-houfe ;  fo  that  I  was  in  perplexity. 
 Yet  God  gave  me  fome  fatisfaflion  and  fwcetnefs  in  medita- 
 tion, and  lifting  up  my  heart  to  God  in  the  midfl:  of  com» 
 pany.  And  although  fome  were  drinking  and  talking  pro- 
 fanely ;  which  was  indeed  a  grief  to  mc,  yet  my  mind  was 
 calm  and  compofed.  And  I  could  not  but  blefs  God,  that  I 
 was  not  like  to  fpend  an  eternity  in  fuch  company.  In  the 
 evening,  I  fat  down  and  wrote  with  compofure  and  freedom; 
 and  can  fay  (through  pure  grace)  it  was  a  comfortable  evening 
 Co  my  foul,  an  evening  1  was  enabled  to  fpend  in  the  fervice 
 of  God. 
 
 Saturday,  November  16.  Croffed  the  ferry  about  ten 
 o'clock;  arrived  at  Eli fabeth- Town  near  night.  Was  in  a 
 calm  compofed  frame  of  mind,  and  felt  an  entire  refignation 
 with  refpeft  to  a  lofs  I  had  lately  fuftained,  in  having  my 
 horfe  ftolen  from  me  the  laft  Wednefday  night,  at  New^ 
 ToWn.  Had  fome  longings  of  foul  for  the  dear  people  of 
 Elifabeth-Town,  that  God  would  pour  out  his  Spirit  upon 
 them,  and  revive  his  work  amongft  them. 
 
 [He  fpent  the  four  next  days  at  Elifabeth-Town,  for  the 
 moft  part,  in  a  free  and  comfortable  ftate  of  mind,  intenfely 
 engaged  in  the  fervice  of  God,  and  enjoying,  at  fome  times, 
 the  fpecial  affiftances  of  his  Spirit.  On  Thurfday,  this  week, 
 he  rode  to  Freehold,  and  fpent  the  day  under  confiderable  de- 
 je<5lion.] 
 
 Friday,  November  22.  Rode  to  Mr  Tennent's,  and  from 
 thence  to  Crofweekfung.  Had  little  freedom  in  meditation, 
 while  riding ;  which  was  a  grief  and  burden  to  my  foul. 
 Oh  that  I  could  fill  up  all  my  time,  whether  in  the  houfc  or 
 by  the  way,  for  God !  I  was  enabled,  I  think,  this  day  to 
 give  up  my  foul  to  God,  and  put  over  all  my  concerns  into 
 his  hands ;  and  found  fome  real  confolation  in  the  thought  of 
 being  entirely  at  the  divine  difpofal,  and  having  no  will  or  in- 
 tereft  of  my  own.  I  have  received  my  all  from  God ;  Oh 
 that  I  could  return  my  all  to  God  •  Surely  God  is  worthy 
 of  my  higheft  afFeflion,  and  moft  devout  adoration  ;  he  is  in- 
 finitely worthy,  that  1  ihould  make  hiiii  my  lalt  end,  and  live 
 
 y  2  for 
 
172  T  H  E    L  I  F  E    O  F  J.  D.  174^ 
 
 for  ever  to  him :  Oh  that  I  might  never  more,  in  any  one  in- 
 fiance,  live  to  myfelf! 
 
 Saturday,  November  23.  Vifited  my  people;  fpent  the- 
 day  with  them:  wrote  forae  things  of  impor^ncc.  But  was> 
 pretty  much  dejefled,  moft  of  the  day. 
 
 [There  is  nothing  very  material  in  his  diafy  for  the  foiff 
 next  days,  but  what  is  alfo  in  his  public  Journal.] 
 
 Thurfday,  November  28. 1  enjoyed  feme  divine  com- 
 fort, and  fervency  in  the  public  excrcife,  and  afterwards. 
 And  while  riding  to  my  lodgings,  was  favoured  with  fome 
 fwect  meditations  on  Luke  ix.  31.  "  Who  appeared  in  glory, 
 **  and  fpake  of  his  deccafe,  which  he  /hould  accomplifli  at 
 "  Jerufalera."  My  thoughts  ran  with  freedom,  and  I  faMr 
 and  felt  what  a  glorious  fubjeft  the  death  of  Christ  is  for 
 g'f}}ifed(<m\o  to  dwell  upon  in  their  converfation.  Oh,  the 
 death  of  Christ!  how  infinitely  precious,' 
 
 [For  the  three  next  days,  fee  the  public  Journal.J 
 
 Monday,  December  2.  Was  much  afFe^led  with  grief,  that 
 I  had  not  lived  more  to  God;  and  felt  ftrong  rcfolutions  t* 
 double  my  diligence  in  my  Mailer's  fervice. 
 
 [After  this,  he  went  to  a  meeting  of  the  Prefytery,  at  a 
 p!;ice  in  New-Jerfey,  called  C onne^icut- Farms ;  which  occa- 
 iKmed  his  abfence  from  his  people  the  reft  of  this  week. 
 He  fpeaksoffome  feafonsof  fweetnefs,  folemnity,  and  fpiritual. 
 ai?t(5lion  in  his  abfence. 
 
 Lord's  day,  December  8.  See  his  public  Journal.] 
 
 Monday,  December  9.  Spent  moft  of  the  day  in  procuring 
 provifions,  in  order  to  my  fetting  up  houfe-keeping  among 
 the  Indians.  Enjoyed  little  fatisfaftion  through  the  day,  be* 
 ing  very  much  out  of  my  element. 
 
 Tuefday,  December  10.  Was  engaged  in  the  fame  bufl*- 
 nefs  as  ycilerday.    Towards  night,  got  into  my  own  houfe  *. 
 
 Wednefday,  December  11.  vSpent  the  forenoon  in  neccf- 
 fary   labour   about  my   houfe.     In   the   afternoon,  rode  out 
 
 •  This  is  the  third  hoxi^e  that  he  built  to  dwell  in  by  himfelf  a- 
 mong  the  Indians  :  the  firft  at  Kaunaumeek  in  the  county  of  Al- 
 ba y  :  the  ffcond  at  the  Forks  of  Delaware  in  Penfyiyania;  and 
 «u/to  this  at  Croi^weekfung  in  Ncw-Jerfoy. 
 
 np©Ei 
 
^m8.      Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  173 
 
 upon  bufinefs,  and  fpent  the  evening  with  fomc  fatisfaflion 
 among  friends  in  converfation  on  a  icrious  and  profitable  fub* 
 jc6l. 
 
 J^Thurfday,  December  12.     See  his  public  Journal.] 
 
 Friday,  December  13.  Spent  the  day  mainly  in  labour  a* 
 bout  my  houfe.  In  the  evening,  fpent  fome  time  in  writing ; 
 but  was  very  weary,  and  much  outdone  with  the  labour  of 
 the  day. 
 
 Saturday,  December  14.  Rofe  early,  and  wrote  by  candle- 
 light fome  confiderable  time ;  fpent  moft  of  the  day  in  wri- 
 ting :  but  was  fomewhat  dejeftcd.  In  the  evening,  was  cx- 
 •rcifed  with  a  pain  in  my  head. 
 
 [For  the  two  next  days,  fee  his  public  Journal.  The  re- 
 mainder of  this  week  he  fpent  chiefly  in  writing  :  fome  part 
 of  the  time  under  a  degree  of  melancholy ;  but  fomc  part  of 
 it  with  a  fweet  ardency  in  religion.] 
 
 Saturday,  December  21. After  my  labours'with  the  In- 
 dians, I  fpent  fome  time  in  writing  fome  things  divine  and 
 folemn ;  and  was  much  wearied  with  the  labours  of  the  day  ; 
 found  that  my  fpirits  were  extremely  fpent,  and  that  I  could 
 do  no  more.  I  am  confcious  to  myfelf  that  my  labours 
 are  as  great  and  conftant  as  my  nature  will  bear,  and  that 
 ordinarily  I  go  to  the  extent  of  my  ftrengtb  ;  fo  that  I  do 
 ;all  I  can  :  but  the  mifery  is,  I  do  not  labour  with  that  hta^ 
 veniy  temper,  that  lingle  eye  to  the  glory  of  God,  that  I  long 
 for. 
 
 [Lord's  day,  December  22.     See  the  public  Journal.] 
 
 Monday,  arid  Tuefday,  December  23.  and  24.  Spent  thefe 
 •lays  in  writing,  with  the  utmoft  diligence.  Felt  in  the  maia 
 a  fweet  mortification  to  the  world,  and  a  defire  to  live  and 
 labour  only  for  God  ;  but  wanted  more  warmth  and  fpiritu- 
 ality,  a  more  fenfible  and  affedionate  regard  to  the  glory  of 
 God. 
 
 [Wednefday,  December  25.  See  the  public  Journal.] 
 
 Thurfday,  and  Friday,  December  26.  and  27.  Laboured 
 iXi  my  (ludies,  to  the  utmoft  of  my  (Irength :  and  though  I 
 felt  a  fteadv  difpofition  «f  mind  to  live  to  God,  and  that  I 
 
174  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  r  J.D.  1746. 
 
 had  nothing  in  this  world  to  live  for ;  yet  I  did  not  find  that 
 fenfible  afFe^lion  in  the  fervice  of  God,  that  I  wanted  to  have ; 
 my  heart  fecmed  barren,  though  my  head  and  hands  were  full 
 of  labour. 
 
 [For  the  four  next  days,  fee  his  public  Journal  *.] 
 
 "Wednefday,  January  i.  I745-6. T  am  this  day  begin- 
 ning a  Nciu  Tear ;  and  God  has  carried  me  through  numerous 
 trials  and  labours  in  the  part.  He  has  amazingly  lupported 
 my  feeble  frame ;  for  "  having  obtained  help  of  God,  I  ccn- 
 **  tinue  to  this  day."  O  that  I  might  live  nearer  to  God, 
 this  year,  than  I  did  the  laft  !  The  bufinefs  1  have  been  called 
 to,  and  enabled  to  go  through,  1  know,  has  been  as  great  as 
 nature  could  bear  up  under,  and  what  would  have  funk  and 
 overcome  me  quite,  without  fpecial  fupport.  But  alas,  alas  I 
 though  I  have  done  the  labours,  and  endured  the  trials,  with 
 what  fpirit  have  I  done  the  one,  and  borne  the  other?  how 
 cold  has  been  the  frame  of  my  heart  oftentimes!  and  how 
 little  have  I  fenlibly  eyed  the  glory  of  God,  in  all  my  doings 
 and  fufferings !  I  have  found,  that  I  could  have  no  peace 
 without  filling  up  all  my  time  with  labours  ;  and  thus  "  ne- 
 **  ceffity  has  been  laid  upon  me ;"  yea,  in  that  refpeft,  I 
 have  loved  to  labour :  but  the  mifery  is,  1  could  not  lenfibly 
 labour  for  God,  as  I  would  have  done.  May  I  for  the  fu- 
 ture be  enabled  more  fenfibly  to  make  the  glory  of  God  my 
 all! 
 
 [For  the  fpacc  from  this  time  till  the  next  Monday,  fee  the 
 public  Journal.] 
 
 Monday,  January  6.  Being  very  weak  in  body,  I  rode  for 
 my  health.  While  riding,  my  thoughts  were  fwectly  en- 
 gaged, for  a  time,  upon  "  the  ftone  cut  out  of  the  mountain 
 **  without  hands,  which  brake  in  pieces"  all  before  it,  and 
 *'  waxed  great,  and  became  a  great  mountain,  and  filled  the 
 "  whole  earth :"  and  I  longed  that  Jefus  fhould  "  take  to 
 "  himfelf  his  great  power,  and  reign  to  the  ends  of  the  earth.'* 
 And  Oh,  how  fweet  were  the  moments,  wherein  I  felt  my 
 foul  warm-  with  hopes  of  the  enlargement  of  the  Redeemer's 
 kingdom!  I  wanted  nothing  elfe  but  that  Chrift  ftiould  reign, 
 to  the  glory  of  his  ble/Ted  name. 
 
 *  On  the  firft  of  thefc  days  he  wrote  the  ftxth  Utter  here  pub- 
 iiflied  at  the  end. 
 
 [The 
 
JEt.2i.     Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  175 
 
 [The  next  day  he  complains  of  want  of  fervency.] 
 
 "Wednefday,  January  8.  In  the  evening,  my  heart  was 
 drawn  oat  after  God  in  fccret :  my  foul  was  refrcflied  and 
 quickened;  and  I  truft,  faith  was  in  exercife.  I  had  great 
 hopes  of  the  ingathering  of  precious  fouls  to  Chrift;  not  only 
 among  my  own  people,  but  others  aUb.  I  was  fweetly  re- 
 figned  and  compofed  under  my  bodily  weaknefs;  and  was 
 willing  to  live  or  die,  and  defirous  to  labour  for  God  to  the 
 utmoft  of  my  ftrength. 
 
 Thurfday,  January  9.  Was  ftill  very  weak,  and  much  ex- 
 ercifed  with  vapoury  diforders.  In  the  evening,  enjoyed 
 fome  enlargement  and  ipirituality  in  prayer.  Oh  that  1  could 
 always  fpend  my  time  profitably,  both  in  health  and  weak- 
 nefs! 
 
 Friday,  January  10.  My  foul  was  in  a  fweet,  calm,  com- 
 pofed  frame,  and  my  heart  filled  with  love  to  all  the  world ; 
 and  Chriftian  fimplicity  and  tendernefs  feemed  then  to  prevail 
 and  reign  within  me.  Near  night,  vifited  a  ferious  baptift- 
 minifter,  and  had  fome  agreeable  converfation  with  him ;  and 
 found  that  I  could  tafte  God  in  friends. 
 
 [For  the  four  next  days,  fee  the  public  Journal.] 
 
 "Wednefday,  January  15.  My  fpirits  were  very  low  and 
 flat,  and  I  could  not  but  think  I  was  a  burden  to  God's 
 earth  ;  and  could  fcarcely  look  any  body  in  the  face,  through 
 /hame  and  fenfe  of  barrennefs.  God  pity  a  poor  unprofitable 
 creature ! 
 
 [The  two  next  days,  .he  had  fome  comfort  and  refrefh- 
 ment.     For  the  two  following  days,  fee  the  public  Journal. 
 
 The  next  day,  he  fet  out  on  a  journey  to  EIintbeth-Town, 
 to  confer  with  the  Correfpondents,  at  their  meeting  there ; 
 and  enjoyed  much  fpiritual  refrefliment  from  day  to  day, 
 through  this  week.  The  things  exprelfed  in  this  fpace  of 
 time,  are  fuch  as  thefe ;  ferenity,  compofurc,  fweetnefs,  and 
 tendernefs  of  foul ;  thankfgiving  to  God  for  his  fuccefs  among 
 the  Indians ;  delight  in  prayer  and  praife ;  fweet  and  profit- 
 able meditations  on  various  divine  fubjefts;  longing  for  more 
 love,  for  more  vigour  to  live  to  God,  for  a  life  more  entirely 
 devoted  to  God,  that  he  might  fpend  all  his  time  profitably 
 for  God  and  in  his  caufe ;  converfmg  on  fpiritual  fubje6ls 
 •NA'ith  afteftion;  and  lamentation  for  unprofitablenefs.] 
 
 Lord's 
 
f  7«  T  H  I     t.  T  r  r     O  F  J.  9.  174^ 
 
 L-irfs  dsy,  J— My  s^  C^  ConeakaE-FinK]  Was 
 fTjH  art-^  cooip^lei-  W«s  auie  friiBbfc  of  atyier  wiiriBTj 
 -«izii3ai  dmae  iKip;  sid  mas  a  tenc  good  ao- 
 _  to  lesse  k  vidi  Gud^  id  ^^  or  vidi-faoU  aftA- 
 ke  few  "mmU  be  aoft  tar  kb  ova  g^bij.  Was  &- 
 viih  a  coafidenUc  degree  of  afiftmc  ia  ay  P"Ule 
 After  padiiic  vorAipi,  I  «»  ia  a  fvrct  and  Caleoa 
 f  Mad,  tJhaakfcl  ID  God  ib«  fac  lad  Bade  me  ia  ibme 
 ar&iare  &idaM  ia  addkefi^  pivciaas  finds,  bat  picved  that 
 I  r^z  >fea  ao  atisrc  fcrvear  ia  ny  ^rwk  ;  aad  was  leader^ 
 I  Ti  ill  i  iiiawd-  J  ifir  TmritJ  iTjjnr  ttay  fii  ij  fii—  i  ini^lr 
 be  fried;  aad  ooaU  aoc  Ittvc  camiwril  aay  biiii  if  ft  tx>> 
 cbe  wji*  cacsy  fiviBg.  Ia  eke  1 1 1  niag,  rode  to  Eii- 
 fofwa:  anaK  noa^y  ww  aiMOBt  oaiBawoy  cagngecl 
 ■ly  keaniDGo^  kdl  I  fcrwihl  kife  tk«  twccc 
 bmI  mayofare  of  CmI  I  tkca  cajoyedi 
 pkafed,  to  filial,  tkat  God  rrrarri/'aad 
 I  coaid  acvcr  be  if  iff  vidi  aaj  of  iiB  di^pca^K 
 KHaftbecBtirety  frdiAed,  ^^latcvcr  tnds  be  froalA 
 or  bisckarek  to  carniiin.  Never  6k  nore  fedbce- 
 ■c6,  Scamt  faeaitjr  aial  niiMiirdaii  <^  aaiad:  anU  fiec^ 
 kaaekft  ike  deareft  cartbty  fiics^  fer  tbe  ibdety  of  *  ao^ 
 *  gck,  aad  %irirsof  jaft  nea  ande  pcrfear*  ny  aibaium 
 fj^rci  iloft  tj  Ae  bkftd  hwAof  of  cwy  dear  cnjoynieat: 
 lyk-acdtjgi  laiaiaif  ilaiifiriTiifliBj  aanacofifceBMiAde- 
 fiokle  canUf  obfeds,  aay  livtfacrikaa  God  is  feca  ia  tkcm  f 
 
 aadkap'^*'^  ^  ^""^'"^ '■'' ■**''*^  pvi^  *  ^^i^>o<i^ 
 wIulL,  I  &«-,  ikcre  rmidd  be  ao  oiie  fleafrrr. 
 
 7  -  - :      '     z :  '   i.  rrcsr  degree  <^  di&  fxrrBng   &aae  <^ 
 r  .XI  :l£TS.     As  id  las  pabfic  torices  fior  aidi 
 
 irr:  ;::.-_       ir.  r:r  :":r?r.":  la  tbi»  riaiT.  fee  tke 
 
 :z^  cjjoycd  fiaie  of 
 
 rzz.  ikat  tncasod  of 
 
 "'  t  ?  hs^v  bad  upon 
 
 three  boan  is 
 
 'refer  lay 
 
 :.  -  1  andy 
 
 .     .    z<.  siiSag  to 
 
 niy 
 
 -.  -^  be  e 
 
iS/.  iS.     W  Ji    DAVID     BRAINERD.  177 
 
 Roman  Catholic,  fent  by  the  Papifts  to  draw  the  Indians  in- 
 to an  infurreftion  againft  the  EngliOi,  that  fome  were  in 
 fear  of  me,  and  others  were  for  having  me  taken  up  by  autho- 
 .  rity  and  punilhcd.  Ahs,  what  will  n  jt  the  devil  do  to  bring 
 a  Uur  and  diigracc  on  the  wark  of  God  I  Oh,  how  holy  and 
 circumfpecl  had  I  need  to  be !  Through  divine  goodnels,  I 
 have  been  enabled  to  "mind  my  own  bufinsfs,"  in  thefe  parts, 
 as  well  as  elfewhere ;  and  to  let  all  men,  and  ail  denominations 
 of  men  alone,  as  to  their  party-mtlcns ;  and  only  preached 
 the  plain  and  nccefTaiy  truths  of  Cb'.Jl. unity,  neirher  inviting 
 to,  nor  excluding  from  my  meeting  any,  of  any  fort  or  per- 
 fuafion  whatfoever.  Towards  night,  the  Lord  gave  rac 
 freed  )m  at  the  throne  of  grace,  in  my  firfl  prayer  before  my 
 eatechetical  lefture  ;  and  in  openmg  the  xlvirh  Pfalm  to  iBy 
 people,  my  foul  confided  in  God,  although  the  wicked  world 
 fhould  (lander  and  perfecute  me,  or  even  condemn  and  ex- 
 ecute me  as  a  traitor  to  my  king  and  country.  Truly  God 
 is  a  "prefent  help  in  time  of  trouble."  In  the  evening,  my 
 foul  was  in  fome  mealure  comforted,  having  fome  hope 
 that  one  poor  foul  was  brought  home  to  God  this  day; 
 though  the  cafe  did  by  no  means  appear  clear.  Oh  that 
 I  could  fill  up  every  moment  of  time,  during  my  abode  here 
 below,  ia  the  fervice  of  my  God  and  King. 
 
 Monday,  February  3.  My  fpirits  were  ftill  much  funk 
 ■with  what  1  heard  the  day  before,  of  my  being  fufpecled  to 
 be  engaged  in  i\\t  Preteniei^s  interefl:  it  grieved  me,  that 
 after  there  had  been  fo  much  evidence  of  a  glori;us  t;.^;'^  cf 
 grace  among  thefe  poor  ladians,  as  that  the  mofl  carnal  men 
 could  n /)t  but  take  notice  of  the  great  change  made  among 
 them,  fo  many  poor  fouls  fhould  ftill  fufpeft  the  ^vhole  to  be 
 only  a  Pop'-pj  plot,  and  fo  cafl:  an  awful  reproach  on  this  blefi^ 
 •d  work  ot  the  divine  Spirit;  and  at  the  fame  time  v holly 
 exclude  thcmf elves  from  receiving  any  benefit  hv  this  divine 
 influence.  This  put  me  upon  fearching  whether  I  had  ever 
 dropped  any  thing  inadvertently,  that  might  give  cccafi.n  to 
 any  to  fuipeci  that  I  was  ftirring  up  the  Indians  againfl  the 
 EngliQi:  and  could  think  of  n  ithing,  unlefs  it  was  my  attempt- 
 ing fometimcs  to  vindicate  the  rights  of  the  Indians,  and  com- 
 plaining of  the  horrid  pracfrice  of  making  the  Indians  drunk,  and 
 then  cheating  them  out  of  their  lands  and  other  pi  cperties  :  and 
 once,  I  remembered,  I  had  done  this  \vich  too  much  warmth 
 of  fpirit.  And  this  much  diftrefled  me  ;  thinking  that  this 
 might  poffibly  prejudife  them  agginft  this  work  of  grace,  to 
 their  cverlafting  deflruTrion.     God,  I   eelieve,  did  me  good 
 
 Z  bv 
 
I7S  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  J.  D.  1746. 
 
 by  this  trial  ;  which  ferved  to  humble  me,  andAewmethe 
 necellity  of  watchfulnefs,  and  of  being  "wile  as  a  leipent," 
 ai  well  as  "harmlefs  as  a  dove."  This  cxercife  led  me  often 
 to  the  throne  of  grace;  and  there  I  found  fomc  lupport: 
 though  I  could  not  get  the  burden  wholly  removed.  Was 
 aliiltcd  in  prayer,  cfpccially  in  the  evening. 
 
 [He  remained  ftill  under  a  degree  of  exercife  of  mind  about 
 this  alTiir;  which  continued  to  have  the  fame  effect  upon 
 liim-,  to  caufe  him  to  refleft  upon,  and  humble  hirrfelf,  and 
 frequent  the  throne  of  grace  :  but  foon  found  himfelf  much 
 more  relieved  and  fupported.  He  was,  this  week,  in  an  ex. 
 tremely  weak  ftate,  and  obliged  (as  he  exprefles  it)  "  to  con- 
 "  fume  confiderable  ti  ne  in  diverfions  for  hib  health." 
 
 For  Saturday,  February  7.  and  the  Sabbath  following,  fee 
 his  public  Journal. 
 
 The  Monday  after,  he  fet  out  on  a  journey  to  the  Forks 
 of  Delaware,  to  vilit  the  Indians  there.  He  performed  the 
 journey  under  great  weaknels,  and  fometimes  was  exerciled 
 with  much  pain  ;  but  fays  nothing  of  dejection  and  melancho- 
 ly. He  arrived  at  his  own  houfe  at  the  Forks,  on  Friday. 
 The  things  appertaining  to  his  inward  frames  and  exercifcs, 
 cxpre /Ted  within  this  week,  are,  fweet  compofure  of  mind; 
 thankfulnefs  to  God  for  his  mercies  to  him  and  others ;  refig- 
 nation  to  the  divine  will;  comfort  in  prayer  and  religious 
 Gonverfation ;  his  heart  drawn  out  after  God,  and  aftt^ted 
 Vvith  a  fenfe  of  his  own  barrennefs,  as  well  as  the  fulnefs  and 
 frecnefs  of  divine  giace.] 
 
 Lord's   day,    February    16. In   the  cvcn'mg,  was   in  a 
 
 fweet  compofed  frame  of  mind.  It  was  exceeding  rehefning 
 and  comfortable,  to  think,  that  God  had  been  with  me,  af- 
 fording me  fome  good  meafurc  of  alliflance.  I  then  found 
 freedom  and  fweetnefs  in  prayer  and  thank fgiving  to  God; 
 and  found  my  foul  fweetly  engaged  and  enlarged  in  prayer  for 
 dear  friends  and  acquaintance.  BlefTed  be  the  name  of  the 
 Lord,  that  ever  I  am  enabled  to  do  any  thing  for  his  dear  in- 
 terefl  and  kingdom.  BlefTed  be  God  who  enables  me  to  be 
 faithful.  Enjoyed  more  rcfolution  and  courage  for  God, 
 and  more  refrefhmcnt  of  fpiric,  than  I  have  been  favoured 
 \Tith  for  many  v/eeks  pafl. 
 
 Monday,  Februaiy  17. 1  was  refrefhcd  and  encouraged : 
 
 found  a  fpirit  of  prayer,  in  the  evening,  and  earnefl  longings 
 for  the  illuminaiion  and  converfion  of  thefe   poor  Indians. 
 
 [Tuefday, 
 
/Et.7B.      Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D,  179 
 
 CTuefday,  February  18.  See  the  public  Journal.} 
 
 Wednefday,  February    19. My   heart   was   comforted 
 
 and  rcfrefhed,  and  my  foul  filled  with  longings  for  the  con- 
 verfion  of  the  Indians  here. 
 
 Thurfday,    February  20. God  was  plcafed  to  fupport 
 
 and  refredi  my  fpirits,  by  aifording  me  alliftance  this  day, 
 and  fo  hopeful  a  profpeft  of  fuccefs  ;  and  I  returned  home 
 rejoicing,  and  blelTing  the  name  of  the  Lord  ;  and  found  free- 
 dom and  fweetnefs  afterwards  in  fecret  prayer,  and  had  my 
 foul  drawn  out  for  dear  friends.  Oh,  how  blelfed  a  thing  is 
 it,  to  labour  for  God  faithfully,  and  with  encouragement  of 
 fuccefs  !  Blerfed  be  the  Lord  for  ever  and  ever,  for  the  affift- 
 ance  and  comfort  granted  this  day. 
 
 Friday,  February  21. My  foul  was  rcfrcfhed  and  com- 
 forted, and  I  could  not  but  blefs  God,  who  had  enabled  me  in 
 fome  good  meafure  to  be  faithful  in  the  day  paft.  Oh,  how 
 fweet  it  is  to  be  fpent  and  worn  out  for  God ! 
 
 Saturday,  February  22. My  fpirits  were  much  fupport- 
 
 :€d,  though  my  bodily  (Itength  was  much  wafted.  Oh  that 
 God  would  be  gracious  to  the  fouls  of  thefe  poor  Indians ! 
 
 God  has  been  very  gracious  to  me  this  week  :  he  has  enabled 
 me  to  preach  every  day  ;  and  has  given  me  fome  afTiftance, 
 and  encouraging  profpcft  of  fuccefs  in  almoft  every  ferm^on. 
 Bleffed  be  his  name.  Divers  of  the  white  people  have  been 
 awakened  this  week,  and  fundry  of  the  Indians  much  cured 
 of  their  prejudices  and  jealoufies  they  had  conceived  againft 
 Chriftianity,  and  fome  feem  to  be  really  awalcened. 
 
 [Lord's  day,  February  23.  See  the  public  Journal. 
 
 The  next  day,  he  1'=  ft  the  Forks  of  Delaware,  to  return  to 
 Crofweekfung  ;  and  fpent  the  whole  week  till  Saturday,  be- 
 fore he  arrived  there ;  but  preached  by  the  way  every  day, 
 excepting  one;  and  was  feveral  times  greaily  afliftcd ;  and 
 had  much  inward  comfort,  and  carneft  longings  to  fill  up  all 
 his  time  with  the  fervice  of  God.  He  utters  fuch  exprcfiicns 
 as  thefe,  after  preaching  :  "  Oh  that  I  mny  be  enabled  to 
 *'  plead  the  caufe  of  God  faithfully,  to  my  dying  moment ! 
 *•  Oh  how  fweet  it  v/ouid  be  to  I'pcnd  ni}  fcif  wholi)''  for 
 *'  God,  and  in  his  caufe,  and  to  be  freed  from  feifilli  motives 
 **  in  my  labours  I" 
 
 For  Saturday  and  Lord's  day,  March  i.  and  2.  fee  the  pu- 
 blic Journal.  I  he  four  next  days  were  fpent  in  great  bodily 
 weaknefs  ;  but  he  fpeaks  of  florae  feafons  of  confiderable  ii.- 
 vard  comfort.] 
 
 Z  2  Thurfda", 
 
iSo  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  P  J.  D,  174$. 
 
 Thurfda}',  March  6.  I  walked  alone  in  the  evening,  and 
 enjoyed  fweetnefs  and  comfort  in  prayer,  beyond  what  1  have 
 of  late  enjoyed  :  my  Ibul  rejoiced  in  my  pilgrimage Jlatr, 
 and  I  was  delighted  with  the  thoughts  of  labouring  and  endu- 
 ring hardnefs  for  God  :  felt  fome  longing  defires  to  preach  the 
 gofpel  to  dear  immortal  fouls ;  and  confided  in  God,  that  he 
 would  be  ivithivt  in  my  work,  and  that  he  "never  would 
 *'  leave  nor  forfake  me,"  to  the  end  of  my  race.  Oh,  may  I 
 "  obtain  mercy  of  God  to  be  faithful,"  to  my  dying  mo». 
 me nt ! 
 
 Fii.iay,  March  7.  In  the  afternoon,  went  on  in  my  work 
 with  freedom  and  cheerfnlnefs,  God  aiTifting  me;  and  enjoy* 
 ed  coaifort  in  the  evening. 
 
 [For  the  two  next  days;  fee  the  public  Journal.^ 
 
 Monday,  March  10. My  foul  vvas  rcfrefhed  with  frees 
 
 dom  and  enlargement,  and  (I  hope)  the  lively  exercife  of 
 faiih,  in  fecret  prayer,  this  night  :  my  will  was  fwcctly  rc- 
 figned  to  the  divine  will,  and  my  hopes  refpefting  the  enlarge* 
 ment  of  the  dear  kingdom  of  Chrift  (orriewhat  raifed,  and 
 could  commit  Zion's  caule  to  God  as  his  own. 
 
 [On  Tuefday  he  fpeaks  of  fome  fweetnefs  and  fpiritualitjr 
 in  Chriftian  converfation.  On  Wednefday,  complains  that 
 he  enjoyed  not  much  comfort  and  fatisfa6tion,  through  the 
 day,  bccaufe  he  did  but  little  for  God.  On  Thurfday,  fpent 
 conhdeiable  time  in  company,  on  a  fpecial  occallon ;  but  in 
 perplexity,  bccaufe  without  favoury  religious  converfation.. 
 For  Friday,  Saturday,  and  Lord's  day,  fee  the  public  Jour* 
 Bal. 
 
 In  the  former  part  of  the  week  following  he  was  very  ill  5 
 and  alfo  under  great  dejedion  ;  being,  as  he  apprehended, 
 rendered  unferviceable  by  his  illnefs,  and  fearing  that  he  fhould 
 iiever  be  ferviceable  any  more ;  and  therefore  exceedingly 
 longed  for  death.  But  afterwards  was  more  encouraged,  and 
 life  appeared  more  defnable ;  bccaufe  (as  he  fays)  he  "  had  a 
 *'  little  dawn  of  he  pe,  that  he  might  be  ufcful  in  the  world." 
 In  the  latter  part  of  the  week,  he  was  in  fcm.e  mcafurc  re- 
 lieved of  his  illnefs,  in  the  ufe  of  means  prefcribed  by  a  phy- 
 fician. 
 
 For  Saturday  and  Lord's  day,  March  22.  and  23.  fee  his 
 public  Journal.] 
 
 Monday,    March  24. After  the  Indians  were  gone  to 
 
JEf.  28.     Mr    DAVID     BRAINERD.  t«c 
 
 ;$hcir  work,  to  clear  their  lands,  I  got  alone,  and  poured  out 
 my  foul  to  God,  that  he  would  fmile  upon  thcfe  feeble  begin- 
 nings, and  that  he  would  fettle  an  Indian  town,  that  might 
 be  a  mountain  of  holinefs  ;  and  found  my  foul  much  rcfrelh- 
 cd  in  thefe  petitions,  and  much  enlarged  for  Zion's  intercft, 
 and  for  numbers  of  dear  friends  in  particular.  My  finking 
 fpirits  were  revived  and  raifed,  and  I  felt  animated  in  the  fer« 
 vice  God  has  called  me  to.  This  was  the  dcareft  hour  I  have 
 ■enjoyed  for  many  days,  if  not  weeks.  1  found  an  encou- 
 raging hope,  that  fomething  would  be  done  for  God,  and 
 that  God  would  ufe  and  help  me  in  his  work.  And  Oh,  how 
 fweet  were  the  thoughts  of  labouring  for  God,  when  I  felt 
 any  fpirit  and  courage,  and  had  any  hope  that  ever  1  ihould 
 be  fucceededi 
 
 [The  next  day,  hxsfchoolmafier  was  taken  fick  with  a  pleu-. 
 rify ;  and  he  fpent  great  part  of  the  remainder  of  this  week 
 in  tending  him :  which  in  his  weak  ftate  was  almoft  an  over- 
 bearing burden  to  him ;  he  being  obliged  conftantly  to  wait 
 wpon  him,  all  day,  from  day  to  day,  and  to  lie  on  the  floor 
 at  night.  His  fpirits  funk  in  a  confiderable  degree,  with  hl» 
 bodily  ftrength,  under  this  burden. 
 
 For  Saturday  and  Lord's  day,  March  29.  and  30.  fee  the 
 public  Journal.] 
 
 Monday,  March  31.  Towards  night,  enjoyed  fome  fweet 
 meditations  on  thofe  words :  "  it  is  good  for  me  to  draw 
 **  near  to  God."  My  fjul,  I  think,  had  fome  fweet  fenl'c  of 
 what  is  intended  ia  thofc  words. 
 
 £The  next  day,  he  M'as  extremely  bufy  in  tending  the 
 fchoolmafter,  and  in  fome  other  neceflary  affairs,  that  great' 
 ly  diverted  him  from  what  he  looked  upon  as  his  proper  bufi* 
 nefs :  but  yet  fpeaks  of  comfort  and  refreftiment,  at  fome 
 times  of  the  day  .J 
 
 Wednefday,  April  2.  Was  fomewhat  exercifed  with  a  fpi- 
 ritlefs  frame  of  mind.  Was  a  little  relieved  and  refreihed  in 
 the  evening,  with  meditation  alone  in  the  woods.  But,  alas! 
 my  days  pafs  away  as  the  chaff!  it  is  but  little  I  do,  or  can 
 do,  that  turns  to  anyacount;  and  it  is  my  conftant  mifcry 
 and  burden,  that  I  am  fo  fruitlcfs  in  the  vineyard  of  the  Lord. 
 Oh  that  I  ^cre  fpirit,  that  I  might  be  aftivc  for  God.  This 
 ^'I  think)  more  than  any  thing  elfe,  makes  me  long,  that  "  this 
 ■'  corruptible  might  put  »n  incorruption,  aad  this  mortal 
 
 *'  put 
 
itz  T  H  E    L  I  F  E    O  F  A.  D,  1746. 
 
 *'  put  on  immortality.'*  God  deliver  me  from  clogs,  fetters, 
 and  a  body  of  death,  that  impede  my  fervicc  for  him. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  complains  bitterly  of  fome  exercifes  by 
 corruption  he  found  in  his  own  heart.] 
 
 Friday,  April  4.  Spent  mofl;  of  the  day  in  writing  on  Rev. 
 Xxii.  17.  "And  whofoever  will,"  6c.  Enjoyed  fome  free- 
 dom and  encouragement  in  my  work  ;  and  found  fome  com^ 
 fort  and  compofure  in  prayer. 
 
 Saturday,  April  5. After  public  worfhip,  a  number  of 
 
 xny  dear  Chriftian  Indians  came  to  my  houfe  ;  with  whom  I 
 felt  a  fweet  union  of  foul :  my  heart  was  knit  to  them  ;  and 
 I  cannot  fay,  I  have  felt  fuch  a  fweet  and  fervent  love  to  the 
 brethren,  tor  fome  time  paft :  and  I  faw  in  them,  appearances 
 of  the  fame  love.  This  gave  me  fomcthing  of  a  view  of  the 
 heavenly  ftate  ;  and  particularly  that  part  of  the  happinefs  of 
 heaven,  which  conlifh  in  the  communion  of  faints:  and  this 
 was  aifcdting  to  me. 
 
 [For  the  two  next  days,  fee  the  public  Journal. 
 
 On  Tuefday,  he  went  to  a  meeting  of  the  Pielbytery  ap- 
 pointed at  £lifabeth-Town.  In  his  way  thither,  he  enjoyed 
 fome  fweet  meditations :  but  after  he  came  there,  he  was  (as 
 he  exprefles  it)  very  vapoury  and  melancholy,  and  under  an 
 a-jjful  gloom,  that  opprefTed  his  mind.  And  this  continued 
 till  Saturday-evening,  when  he  began  to  have  fome  relief  and 
 encouragement.  He  fpent  the  Sabbath  at  Staten-Ifland  j 
 where  he  preached  to  an  affcmbly  of  Dutch  and  Englifli,  and 
 enjoyed  confiderable  refrefhment  and  comfort,  both  in  public 
 and  private.    In  the  evening  be  returned  to  Elifabeth-Town.]] 
 
 Monday,  April  14.  My  fpirits  this  day  were  raifed  and  rc- 
 frefhed,  and  my  mind  compofed,  fo  that  I  was  in  a  comfort- 
 able frame  of  foul,  moft  of  the  day.  In  the  evening  my  head 
 %vas  clear,  my  mind  feren,e  ;  I  enjoyed  fweetnefs  in  ftcret 
 prayer,  and  meditation  on  Pfal.  Ixxiii.  28.  Oh,  how  free, 
 how  comfortable,  chearful,  and  yet  folemn,  do  1  feel  Mhcn  I 
 am  in  a  good  meafure  freed  from  thofe  damps  and  melancholy 
 glooms,  that  I  often  labour  under!  And  blefled  be  the  Lord, 
 I  find  my felf  relieved  in  this  refpe^l. 
 
 Tuefday,  April  15.  My  foul  longed  for  more  fpirituality ; 
 and  it  was  ray  burden,  that  I  could  do  no  more  for  God.  Oh, 
 my  barrennefs  is  my  daily  afPiiftion  and  heavy  load !  Oh, 
 kow  precious  is  time :  and  how  it  pains  me,  to  fee  it  Hide  a- 
 
 way, 
 
jEt.ig.      Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  183 
 
 way,  while  I  ^o  fo  very  liitle  to  any  good  purpofe !    Oh  that 
 God  would  make  me  more  fruitful  and  fpiritual. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  fpeaks  of  his  being  almoft  overwhelmed 
 with  vapoury  diiorders ;  but  yet  not  fo  as  wholly  to  deftroy 
 the  compofure  of  his  mind.] 
 
 Thurfday,  April  17.  Enjoyed  fome  comfort  in  prayer, 
 fome  freedom  in  meditation,  and  compofure  in  my  fludies. 
 Spent  fame  time  in  writing,  in  the  forenoon.  In  the  after- 
 noon, fpent  fome  time  in  converfation  with  feveral  dear  mi- 
 niflers.  In  the  evening,  preached  from  Pfal.  Ixxiii.  28. 
 "  But  it  is  good  for  me  to  draw  near  to  God.''  God  helped 
 me  to  feel  the  truth  of  my  text,  both  in  the  firft  prayer  and 
 in  fermon.  I  was  enabled  to  pjur  out  my  foul  to  God,  with 
 great  freedom,  fervency,  and  alfcftion :  and,  bleffed  be  the 
 Lord,  it  was  a  comfortable  feafon  to  me.  I  was  enabled  to 
 fpeak  with  tendernefs,  and  yet  with  faithfulnefs :  and  divine 
 truths  feemed  to  fall  with  weight  and  influence  upon  the 
 hearers.  My  heart  was  melted  for  the  dear  aflembly,  and  I 
 loved  every  body  in  it ;  and  fcarce  ever  felt  more  love  to  im- 
 mortal fouls  in  my  life;  my  foul  cried,  "  Oh  that  the  dear 
 "  creatures  might  be  faved !  O  that  God  would  have  mercy 
 «  on  them!" 
 
 [He  feems  to  have  been  in  a  very  comfortable  frame  of 
 mind  the  two  next  days.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  April  20.  *  Enjoyed  fome  freedom,  and,  I 
 hope,  exercife  of  faith  in  prayer,  in  the  morning;  efpecially 
 when  I  came  to  pray  for  Zion.  I  was  free  from  that  gloomy 
 difccuragement,  that  fo  often  oppreffes  my  mind  ;  and  my 
 foul  rejoiced  in  the  hopes  of  Zion's  profperity,  and  the  ea 
 largement  of  the  dear  kingdom  of  the  great  Redeemer.  O 
 that  his  kingdom  might  come. 
 
 Monday,  April  2j.  Was  compofed  and  comfortable  in 
 mind,  moft  of  the  day ;  was  mercifully  freed  from  thofe 
 gloomy  damps  that  I  am  frequently  exercifed  with  :  had  free- 
 dom and  comfort  in  prayer,  feveral  times ;  efpecially  had 
 fome  rifmg  hopes  of  Zion's  enlargement  and  profperity.  And 
 Oh,  how  rcfrefning  were  thefe  hopes  to  my  foul !  Oh  that 
 the  kingdom  of  the  dear  Lord  might  come.  Oh  that  the 
 poor  Indians  might  quickly  ber  gathered  in,  in  great  numbers ! 
 
 *  This  day  he  entered  into  the  29th  ye*r  oi  his  age. 
 
 r     Tuefdav, 
 
it4  T  H  E    L  I  P  E     O  F  ^.  i9.  r;^^, 
 
 TuefJay,  April  22.  My  mind  was  remarkably  free,  this 
 day,  from  melancholy  damps  and  glooms,  and  animated  in 
 my  work.  I  found  fuch  freih  via;aur  and  refolution  in  the 
 fcrvicc  of  God,  that  the  mountains  feemcd  to  become  a  pUitt 
 before  me.  Oh,  bUfTcd  be  God  for  an  interval  of  refrefli- 
 ment,  and  fervent  refolution  in  my  Lord's  work  !  In  the 
 •vening,  my  foul  was  rcfrefhcd  in  fecret  prayer,  and  my  heart 
 drawn  out  for  divine  bleffmgs ;  efpectaily  tor  the  church  of 
 God,  and  his  intereft  among  my  own  people,  and  for  dear 
 friends  in  remote  places.  Oh  that  Zion  might  profper,  and 
 precious  fouls  be  brought  home  to  God! 
 
 [In  this  comfortable  fervent  frame  of  mind  he  remained  the 
 two  next  days. 
 
 For  the  four  days  next  following,  viz.  Friday,  Saturday, 
 
 Lord's  day,    and    Monday,    fee  his   public   Journal. On 
 
 Tuefday  he  went  to  Eli fabcth- Town,  to  attend  the  meeting 
 of  the  Prelbytery  there  :  and  feemed  to  fpcnd  the  time,  while 
 abfent  from  his  people  on  this  occafion,  in  a  free  and  comfort- 
 able Aate  of  mind.] 
 
 Saturday,  May  3.  Rode  from  Elifabeth-Town  home  to  my 
 people,  at  or  near  Cranberry ;  whither  they  are  now  re- 
 moved, and  where,  I  hope,  God  will  fettle  them  as  a  Chri- 
 ftian  congregation.  Was  rcfreflied  in  lifting  up  my  heart  to 
 God,  while  riding;  and  enjoyed  a  thankful  frame  of  fpirit, 
 for  divine  favours  received  the  week  paft.  Was  fome-^ 
 ■what  uneafy  and  dejc6led,  in  the  evening  ;  having  no  houfe 
 of  my  own  to  go  into  in  this  place :  but  God  was  my  fup- 
 port.    f 
 
 ,  [For  Lord's  day  and  Monday,^  fee  the  public  Journal.] 
 
 Tuefday,  May  6.  Enjjoyed  feme  fpirit  and  courage  in  my 
 work  ;  was  in  a  good  meafure  free  from  melancholy  :  bleflcd 
 be  God  for  freedom  from  this  death. 
 
 Wednefday,  May  7.  Spent  moft  of  the  day  in  writing,  as 
 ufual.  Enjoyed  fome  freedom  in  my  work.  Was  favoured 
 %vith  fome  comfortable  meditations,  this  day.  In  the  even- 
 ing, was  in  a  fweet  compofed  frame  of  mind;  -was  pleafed 
 ^id  delighted  to  leave  all  with  God,  rcfpefling  myfelf,  for 
 time  and  eternity,  and  refpe£ling  the  people  of  my  charge, 
 and  dear  friends :  had  no  doubt  but  that  God  would  take  care 
 •f  me,  and  of  his  own  intereft  among  niy  people  ;  and  was 
 
 •nablcd 
 
Jf/.  29-       Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  185 
 
 enabled  to  ufe  freedom   in  prayer,  as  a  child  with  a  tender 
 father.     Oh,  how  fweet  is  fuch  a  frame! 
 
 Thurfdiy,  May  8.  In  the  evening,  was  fomewhat  re- 
 freshed with  divine  things,  and  enjoyed  a  tender  melting  frame 
 in  fecre  prayer,  wherein  my  foul  was  drawn  out  for  the  in- 
 tereft:  of  Zion,  and  comforted  with  the  lively  hope  of  the 
 appearing  of  the  kingdom  of  the  great  Redeemer.  Thefe 
 were  fweet  moments  :  I  felt  almoft  loth  to  go  to  bed,  and 
 grieved  that  flcep  was  neceffary.  However,  I  lay  down  v/ith 
 a  tender  reverential  fear  of  God,  fenfible  that  "  his  favom*  is 
 "  Ufe,"  and  his  frniles  better  than  all  that  earth  can  boaft  of, 
 infinitely  better  than  life  itfelf. 
 
 [Friday  May  9.  See  the  public  Journal.] 
 
 Saturday,  May  10.  Rode  to  Allcn's-Town,  to  afTiH:  in  the 
 adminiflration  of  the  Lord's  fupper.  In  the  afternoon, 
 preached  from  Tit.  ii.  14.  "  Who  gave  himfelf  for  us,"  i,c. 
 God  was  pleafed  to  carry  me  through  v/ith  fome  competency 
 of  freedom  ;  and  yet  to  deny  me  that  enlargement  and  power 
 i  longed  for.  In  the  evening,  ray  foul  mourned,  and  could 
 not  but  mourn,  that  1  had  treated  fo  excellent  a  fubjeft  in  fo 
 defective  a  manner,  that  I  had  borne  fo  broken  a  teftimony  for 
 fo  worthy  and  glorious  a  Redeemer.  And  if  my  difcourfe 
 had  met  with  the  utmoft  applaufe  from  all  the  world,  (as  I 
 acci  Jentally  heard  it  applauded  by  fome  perfons  of  judgment), 
 it  would  not  have  given  me  any  fatisfaclion  :  Oh,  it  grieved 
 me,  to  think,  that  I  had  had  no  more  holy  warmth  and  fer- 
 vency, that  I  had  been  no  more  melted  in  difcourfing  of 
 Chrift's  death,  and  the  end  and  defign  of  it!  Afterwards,  en- 
 joyed fome  freedom  and  fervency  in  fecret  and  family  prayer, 
 and  longed  much  for  the  prefence  of  God  to  attend  his  word 
 and  ordinances  the  next  day. 
 
 Lord's  day.  May  11.  Affifted  in  the  adminiflration  of  the 
 Lord's  fupper;  but  enjoyed  little  enlargement:  was  grieved 
 and  funk  with  fome  things  I  thought  undefirablc,  6c.  In  the 
 afternoon,  went  to  the  houfc  of  God  v/eak  and  lick  in  foul, 
 ,as  well  as  feeble  in  body :  and  longed,  that  the  people  might 
 be  entertained  and  edified  with  divine  truths,  and  that  an  ho- 
 neft  fervent  teflimony  might  be  borne  for  God ;  but  knew  not 
 how  it  was  pofTihle  for  me  to  do  any  thing  of  that  kind,  to 
 any  good  purpofe.  Yet  God,  who  is  rich  in  mercy,  was 
 -pleafed  to  give  me  afliftance,  both  in  prayer  and  preaching; 
 -God  helped  me  to  wrcftle  for  his  prefence,  in  prayer,  svA  to 
 tell  him,  that  he  had  pro^mifed,  "  V/hcre  two  or  three  are  met 
 
 A  a  "  lcge:l.L-r 
 
Il6  T  H  E    L  I  F  E    O  F  A.  D.  174,6. 
 
 *'  together  in  his  name,  there  he  would  be  in  the  midft  of 
 "  them;"  and  that  v/e  were,  at  leaft  fomc  of  us,  fo  met; 
 and  pleaded,  that  for  his  truth's  fake  he  would  be  with  us. 
 Ani  blelFed  be  God,  it  was  fwect  to  my  foul,  thus  to  plead, 
 and  rely  on  God's  promifcs.  Difcourfed  upon  Luke  ix.  30. 
 31.  "And  behold,  there  talked  with  him  two  men,  which 
 "  were  Mofcs  and  EUas ;  who  appeared  in  glory,  and  fpake 
 *'  of  hi^  deceafe,  which  he  fhould  accomplifn  at  Jerufalem." 
 Enjoyed  fpecial  freedom,  from  the  beginning  to  the  end  of 
 my  difcourfe,  without  interruption.  Things  pertinent  to 
 the  fubjefi:  were  abundantly  preJented  to  my  view;  and  fuch 
 a  fulnefs  of  matter,  that  1  fcarce  knew  how  to  difmifs  the 
 various  heads  and  particulars  I  had  occafion  to  touch  upon. 
 And,  blelfed  be  the  Lord,  I  was  favoured  with  fome  fervency 
 and  pov/cr,  as  well  as  freedom ;  fo  that  the  word  of  God 
 feemed  to  awaken  the  attention  of  a  ftupid  audience,  to  a 
 Gonfiderable  degree.  I  was  inwardly  refrefhed  uith  the  corr- 
 folations  of  God  ;  and  could  with  my  whole  heart  fay, 
 "  Though  there  be  no  fruit  in  the  vine,  ec.  yet  will  I  rc- 
 "  joice  in  the  Lord."  After  public  fervice,  was  refrefhed 
 with  the  fweet  converfation  of  fome  Chriilian  friends. 
 
 [The  four  next  days  feem  to  have  been  raoftly  fpcnt  with 
 fpiritual  comfort  and  profit.] 
 
 Friday,  May  j6.  Near  night,  enjoyed  fome  agreeable  and 
 fv/eet  converfation  with  a  dear  minifl-er,  which,  I  trufl:,  was 
 bleffed  to  my  foul:  ray  heart  Was  warmed,  and  my  foul  en- 
 gaged to  live  to  God ;  fo  that  I  longed  to  exert  myfelf  with 
 more  vigour,  than  ever  I  had  done,  in  his  caufe  :  and  ihofe 
 words  were  quickening  to  me,  "  Herein  is  my  Father  glori- 
 "  fiedj  that  ye  bring  forth  m-uch  fruit."  Oh,  ray  foul  long- 
 ed, and  wi(}\ed,  and  prayed,  to  be  enabled  to  live  to  God 
 with  utmoft  conflancy  and  ardour!  In  the  evening,  God  was 
 pleafed  to  fliine  upon  me  in  fecret  prayer,  and  draw  out  my 
 foul  after  himfelf;  and  I  had  freedom  in  fupplication  for 
 myfelf,  but  much  more  in  interceffion  for  others :  fo  that  I 
 was  fwcetly  connTainc<:i  to  fay,  "  Lord,  ufe  me  as  thou  wilt; 
 *'  do  as  thou  <vilt  with  me :  but  Oh,  promote  thine  own 
 *'  caufe !  Zion  is  thine ;  Oh  vifit  thine  heritage  I  Oh  let  thy 
 "  kingdom  come !  Oh  let  thy  blefled  intereft  be  advanced 
 "  in  the  world  !"  When  I  attempted  to  look  to  God,  rc- 
 fpeifting  my  worldly  circumftances,  and  his  providential  deal- 
 ings with  me,  in  regard  of  my  fettling  down  in  my  congre- 
 gation, wluch  fssms  to  be  neceffary,  and  yet  very   difficult, 
 
 ani 
 
Mt.ig.       M  R    D  A  V  I  D     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  ity 
 
 and  contrary  to  my  fixed  intention  for  years  paft,  as  well  as 
 my  difpofition,  which  has   been,  and   ftill  is,  at   times  efpe- 
 cially,  to  go  forth,  and  fpend  my  life  in  preaching  the  gofpcl 
 from  place  to  place,  and  gathering  fouls  afar  off"  to   Jesus 
 the  great  Redeemer  ;  when  I  attempted  to  look  to  God  with 
 -regard  to  thcfe  thmgs,  and  his  deligns  concerning  me,  I  could 
 only  fay,  "  The  will  of  the   Lord  be    done  :  it  is  no   matter 
 *'  for  me."     The  fame  frame  of  mind   I   felt  with  refpe£l  to 
 another   important   affair    I   have   lately    had   fomc   ferious 
 thoughts  of:  I  could  fay,  with    utmofl   calmnefs    and   cora- 
 pofurc,  "  Lord,  if  it   be   mofl  for  thy  glor}',  let  me  proceed 
 ^'  in  it;  but  if  thou  feeft  that  it  will   in  any   wife   hinder  my 
 "  ufcfulnefs  in  thy  caufe,   Oh    prevent   my   proceeding ;  for 
 ^'  all  I  want,  refpefting   this   world,  is  fuch  circumftances  as 
 "  may  beft  capacitate  me  to  do  fervice  for  God  in  the  world/* 
 But  blefled  be  God,  I  enjoyed  liberty  in  prayer    for  my  dear 
 flock,  and  was  enabled  to  pour  out  my  foul   into   the   bofom 
 oi  a  tender   Father :  my  heart  within  me  was  melted,  when 
 I  came  to  plead  for  my  dear  people,  and   for  the  kingdom  of 
 Chrifl  in  general.     Oh,  how  fweet  was  this   evening   to   my 
 foul  I  I  knew  not  how  to  go  to  bed ;  and   when   got   to   bed, 
 longed  for  fome  way  to  improve  time   for  God,  to  fomc  ex- 
 cellent purpofe.     "  Blefs  the  Lord,  O  my  foul." 
 
 Saturday,  May  17.  Walked  out  in  the  morning,  and  felt 
 much  of  the  fame  frame  I  enjoyed  the  evening  before :  had 
 my  heart  enlarged  in  praying  for  the  advancement  of  the  king- 
 dom of  Chrift,  and  found  utmofl  freedom  in  leaving  all  my 
 concerns  with  God. 
 
 I  find  {Vfcouragement  to  be  an  exceeding  hindrance  to  my 
 fpiritual  fervency  and  affeftion  :  but  when  God  enables  mc 
 fenlibly  to  find  that  I  have  done  fomething  for  him,  this  rc- 
 frefhes  and  animates  me,  fo  that  I  could  break  through  all 
 hardfhips,  undergo  any  labours,  and  rothing  feems  too  much 
 either  to  do  or  to  fuffer.  But  Oh,  what  a  death  it  is,  to 
 ftrive,  and  ftrive ;  to  be  always  in  a  hurry,  and  yet  do  no- 
 thing, or  at  lead  nothing /or  God!  Alas,  alas,  that  time 
 flies  away,  and  I  do  fo  little  for  God! 
 
 Lord's  day.  May  18.  I  felt  my  own  utter  infufficiency 
 for  my  work :  God  made  me  to  fee,  that  I  was  a  child-,  yea, 
 that  I  was  zfool.  I  difcourcfd,  both  parts  of  the  day,  from 
 Rev.  iii.  20.  "  Behold,  I  ftand  at  the  door,  and  knock.'* 
 God  gave  me  freedom  and  power  in  the  latter  part  of  my 
 (forenoon's)  difcourfc ;  although,  in  the  former  part  of  it» 
 I  felt  peeviih  and  provoked  with  the  unmannerly  behaviour 
 
 A  a  2  of 
 
lU  ,T  H  E    L  I  r  E     O  F  J.  D.  1746. 
 
 of  the  -white  people,  who  crouded  in  between  my  people  and 
 me  ;  which  proved  a  great  temptation  to  me.  But  blefTed 
 be  God,  I  got  thefe  fhacldes  orf  before  the  middle  of  my 
 difcourfe,  and  was  favoured  with  a  fwect  frame  of  fpirit  in 
 the  latter  part  of  the  exercife;  was  full  of  love,  warmtl ,  and 
 
 tendernefs,  in   addreffing  my   dear   people. In  the  inter- 
 
 milTion-feafon,  could  not  but  difcourle  to  my  people  on  the 
 kindncfo  and  patience  of  Chrift  in  fi ending   and   knocking   at 
 
 the  door,  &c. In  the  evening,  Iwas  grieved,  that    1    had 
 
 done  fo  little  for  God.  Oh  that  I  could  be  a  flame  of  fire  in 
 the  fervice  of  ray  God  I 
 
 [Monday,  May  19.  See  the  public  Journal. 
 On  Tuefday,  he  complains  of  want  of  freedom  and  comfort  j 
 but  had  fome  return  of  thcfe  on  Wednefday.] 
 
 Thurfday,  May  22.  In  the  evening,  was  in  a  frame  fomc- 
 what  remarkable :  had  apprehended  for  feveral  days  before, 
 that  it  was  the  defign  of  providence  I  [houlA.  fettle  among  my 
 people  here ;  and  had  in  my  own  mind  begun  to  make  provi- 
 lion  for  it,  and  to  contrive  means  to  haften  it ;  and  found  my 
 heart  fomcthing  engaged  in  it,  hoping  I  might  then  erjoy 
 more  agreeable  circumftances  of  life,  in  feveral  refpefts :  and 
 yet  was  never  fully  determined,  never  quite  pleafed  with  the 
 thoughts  of  being  fettled  and  confined  to  one  place.  Ntver- 
 thelefs  I  feemed  to  have  fome  freedom  in  that  reipc£l,  becaufe 
 the  congregation  I  thought  of  fettling  with,  was  one  that  God 
 had  enabled  me  to  gather  from  amongft  Pagans.  1-or  I  never 
 fince  I  began  to  preach,  could  feel  any  freedom  to  •*  enter  in- 
 "  to  other  mens  labours,"  and  fettle  down  in  the  miniftry 
 where  the  "gofpel  was  preached  before  ;"  I  never  could  make 
 that  appear  to  be  my  providence :  when  I  felt  any  dilpofition 
 to  confult  my  eafe  and  worldly  comfort,  God  has  never  given 
 me  any  liberty  in  that  refpefi:,  either  fmce,  or  for  fome  years 
 before  I  began  to  preach.  But  God  having  fuccecded  my  la- 
 bours, and  made  me  inftrumental  of  gathering  a  church  for 
 him  among  thele  Indians,  I  was  ready  to  think,  it  might  be 
 his  defign  t9  give  Bic  a  quiet  fettlement  and  a  ftated  home  of 
 my  Gv/n.  And  this,  confidering  the  late  frequent  finking  and 
 failure  of  my  fpirits,  and  the  need  I  flood  in  of  fome  agree- 
 able fociety,  and  my  great  defire  of  enjoying  convcnicncies 
 and  opportunities  for  profitable  ftudies,  was  not  altogether 
 d-ifagreeable  to  me:  although  I  ftill  wanted  to  go  about  far 
 r.nd  v.'ide,  in  order  to  fpread  the  blefTed  gofpel  among  benight- 
 ed fouls^  far  remote;  yet  I  never  knd  been  fo  willing  to  fettlp 
 
 m 
 
JEt.^9'        M^     DAV][D     BRAINERD.  189 
 
 in  any  one  place,  for  more  than  five  years  paft,  as  I  was  in 
 tb«  foregoing  part  of  this  week.  But  now  thefe  thoughts 
 feemed  to  be  wholly  dafhed  to  pieces  ;  not  by  neccffity,  but  of 
 choice  :  for  it  appeared  to  me,  that  God's  dealings  towards 
 me  had  fitted  me  for  a  life  of  folitarinefs  and  hardlhip  ;  it  ap- 
 peared to  me  I  had  nothing  to  lofe,  nothing  to  do  with  earth, 
 and  confequently  nothing  to  lofe  by  a  total  renunciation  of 
 it:  and  it  appeared  juft  right,  that  I  ihould  be  deftitute  of 
 houfe  and  home,  and  many  comforts  of  life,  which  I  rejoiced 
 to  fee  others  of  God's  people  enjoy.  And  at  the  fame  time, 
 I  faw  fo  much  of  the  excellency  of  Chrift'b  kingdom,  and  the 
 infinite  defirablenefs  of  its  advancement  in  the  world,  that  it 
 fwallowed  up  all  my  other  thoughts ;  and  made  me  willing, 
 yea,  even  rejoice,  to  be  made  a  pilgrim  or  hermit  in  the  v^^iU 
 dernefs,  to  my  dying  moment,  if  J  might  thereby  promote 
 the  blefied  interefl:  of  the  great  Redeemer.  And  if  ever  my 
 ibul  prefented  itfelf  to  God  for  his  fervice,  without  any  rc- 
 ferve  of  any  kind,  it  did  fo  now.  The  language  of  my 
 thoughts  and  difpoficion  (although  I  fpake  no  words)  now 
 were,  "  Here  I  arriy  Lord,  fend  me ;  fend  me  to  the  ends  of 
 "  the  earth  ;  fend  me  to  the  rough,  the  favage  Pagans  of  the 
 *'  wildernefs ;  fend  me  from  all  that  is  called  comfort  in  earth, 
 ^'  or  earthly  comfort ;  fend  me  even  to  death  itfelf,  if  it  be 
 "  but  in  thy  fervice,  and  to  promote  thy  kingdom."  And 
 at  the  fame  time  I  had  as  quick  and  lively  a  fenfe  of  the  value 
 of  worldly  comforts,  as  ever  I  had  ;  but  only  faw  them  in- 
 finitely overmatched  by  the  worth  of  Chrift's  kingdom,  and 
 the  propagation  of  his  bleffed  gofpel.  The  quiet  fettlement, 
 the  certain  place  of  abode,  the  tender  friendfhip,  which  I 
 thought  I  might  be  likely  to  enjoy  in  confequence  of  fuch  cir- 
 cumftances,  appeared  as  valuable  to  me,  confidered  abfolutely 
 and  in  themfelves,  as  ever  before;  but  confidered  compara^ 
 lively,  they  appeared  nothing ;  compared  with  the  value  and 
 precioufnefs  of  an  enlargement  of  Chrift's  kingdom,  they 
 vani(hed  like  the  ftars  before  the  rifmg  fun.  And  fure  1  am, 
 that  although  the  comfoi  table  accommodations  of  life  appeared 
 valuable  and  dear  to  me,  yet  I  did  furrender  and  refign  myfelf, 
 foul  and  body,  to  the  fervice  of  God,  and  promotion  of 
 Chrift's  kingdom ;  though  it  ftiould  be  in  the  lois  of  them  all. 
 And  I  could  not  do  any  other,  becaufe  I  could  not  will  or 
 chufe  any  other.  I  was  conftrained,  and  yet  chofe,  to  fay, 
 "  Farewell,  friends  and  earthly  comforts,  the  deareft  of 
 "  them  all,  the  very  deareft,  if  the  Lord  calls  for  ii ;  adieu, 
 "  adieu ;  I'll  fpEnd  my  life,  to  my  lateft  moments,  in  caves 
 f^  and  dens  of  the  earth,  if  the  kingdom  of  Chriftmay  thereby 
 
 '  "be 
 
l^e  THELIFEOr  J.D.  1746. 
 
 "  b«  advanced."  I  found  extraordinary  freedom  at  this  tim« 
 in  pouring  out  my  foul  to  God^  for  his  caufe ;  and  cfpecially 
 that  his  kingdom  might  be  extended  among  the  Indians,  far 
 remote;  and  I  had  a  great  and  ftrong  hope,  that  God  vould 
 do  it.  I  continued  wreftling  with  God  in  prayer  for  my 
 dear  little  flock  here;  and  more  cfpecially  for  the  Indians 
 clfewhere  ;  as  well  as  for  dear  friends  in  one  place  and  another; 
 till  it  was  bed-time,  and  I  feared  I  fhould  hinder  the  famil)', 
 ^c.  But  Oh,  with  what  reludlancy  did  I  find  myfelf  obliged 
 to  confume  time  in  lleep  I  I  longed  to  be  as  a  flame  cf  flrCf 
 continually  glowing  in  the  divine  fervice,  preaching  and  build- 
 ing up    ChriA's   kingdom,  to  my  lateft,  my  dying  moment. 
 
 Friday,  May  23.  In  the  morning,  was  in  the  lame  frame  of 
 mind,  as  in  the  evening  before.     The   glory  of  Chrift's  king- 
 dom fo   much    outfhone  the  pleafure  of  earthly  accommoda- 
 tions and  enjoyment?,  that  they  appeared   comparatively  no- 
 thing, though  in  themfelves  good  and  deHrable.    My  foul  was 
 melted  in  lecret  meditation  and  prayer,  and  I  found  myfelf 
 divorced  from  any  part  in  this  world  ;  fo  that  in  thofe  affairs 
 that   feemed   of  the  greateft  importance  to  me,  in  refpeft  of 
 the   prefent  life,  and  thofe  wherein  the  tender  powers  of  the 
 mind  are  moft  fenfibly  touched,  I  could  only  fay,  "The  will 
 *'  of  the  Lord  be  done."  But  juft  the  fame  things  that  I  felt 
 the  evening  before,  I  felt  now  ;  and  found  the  fame  freedona 
 in  prayer  for  the  people  of  my  charge,  for  the  propagation 
 of  the  gofpel  among  the  Indians,  and  for  the  enlargement  and 
 fpiritual  welfare  of  Zion  in  general,  and   my  dear  friends  in 
 particular,  now,  as  I  did  then  ;  and  longed  to  burn  out  in  one 
 continued  flame  for  God.     Retained  much  of  the  fame  frame 
 through  the  day.     In   the  evening,  was  vifited  by  my  brother 
 John  Brainerd :  the  firfl  vifit   I   have  ever  received  from  any 
 near  relative,  fince  I  have  been  a  miffionary.     Felt  the  fame 
 frame  of  fpirit  in  the  evening,  as  in  the  morning ;  and  found 
 that  "it  was  good   forme  to  draw  near  to  God,"  and  leave 
 all  my  concerns   and  burdens  with  him.     Was  enlarged  and 
 refrefhed  in  pouring  out  my  foul  for  the  propagation  of  the 
 gofpel  of  the  Redeemer  among  the  diflant  tribes  of  Indians. 
 Bleffed  be  God.     If  ever  I  filled  up  a  day  with  ftudies  and  de- 
 votion,  T  was  enabled  fo  to  fill  up  this  day. 
 
 Saturday,  May  24. Enjoyed  this  day  fomcthing  of  the 
 
 fame  frame  of  mind  as  I  felt  the  day  before. 
 
 [Lord's  day,  May  25.   See  the  public  Journal. 
 This  week,  at  leaft  the  former  part  of  it,  he  was  in  a  very 
 •ft-sak  ftate :  but  yet  feems  to  have  be^n  free  from  melancholy, 
 
 which 
 
Mt.29.      Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  i^i 
 
 which  often  had  attended  the  failing  of  his  bodily  ftrcngth. 
 He  from  time  to  time  fpeaks  of  comfort  and  inward  rcfrcili* 
 ment,  this  week. 
 
 Lord's  day,  June  i.  See  the  public  Jouraal.] 
 
 Monday,  June  t.  In  the  .evening,  enjoyed  fome  freedora 
 in  fecret  prayer  and  meditation. 
 
 Tuefday,  June  3.  My  foul  rejoiced,  early  in  the  morn- 
 ing, to  think,  that  all  things  v/ere  at  God's  difpofal.  Oh,  it 
 pleafed  me  to  leave  them  there !  Felt  afterwards  much  as  I  did, 
 on  Thurfday  evening,  May  22.  laft;  and  continued  in  this 
 frame  for  feveral  hours.  Walked  out  into  the  wildernefs, 
 and  enjoyed  freedom,  fervency,  and  comfort,  in  prayer:  and 
 again  enjoyed  the  fame  in  the  evening. 
 
 Wednesday,  June  4.  Spent  the  day  in  writing,  and  enjoy- 
 td  fome  comfort,  fatisfaflion,  and  freedom  in  my  work.  In 
 the  evening,  I  was  favoured  with  a  fweet  refrefhing  frame  of 
 foul  in  fecret  prayer  and  meditation.  Prayer  was  now  wholly 
 turned  into  praife,  and  I  could  do  little  elfe  but  try  to  adore 
 and  blefs  the  living  God :  the  wonders  of  his  grace  difplayed 
 in  gathering  to  himfelf  a  church  among  the  poor  Indians  here, 
 •were  the  fubjefl-matter  of  my  meditation,  and  the  occafion 
 of  exciting  my  foul  to  praife  and  blefs  his  name.  My  foul 
 was  fcarce  ever  more  difpofed  to  inquire,  "  What  I  fhould 
 '*  render  to  God  for  all  his  benefits,"  than  at  this  time.  Oh, 
 I  was  brought  into  a  ftrait,  a  fweet  and  happy  Itrait,  to  know 
 what  to  do !  I  longed  to  make  fome  returns  to  God ;  but 
 found  I  had  nothing  to  return :  I  could  only  rejoice,  that 
 God  had  done  the  work  himfelf;  and  that  none  in  heaven  or 
 earth  might  pretend  to  ihare  the  honour  of  it  with  him ;  I 
 could  only  be  glad,  that  God's  declarative  glory  was  advanced 
 by  the  converfion  of  thefe  fouls,  and  that  it  was  to  the  en- 
 largement of  his  kingdom  in  the  world:  but  faw  I  was  (o 
 poor,  that  I  had  nothing  to  offer  to  him.  My  foul  and  bo- 
 dy, through  grace,  I  could  cheerfully  furrcnder  to  him:  but  it 
 appeared  to  me,  this  was  rather  a  cumber,  than  a  gift ;  and 
 nothing  could  I  do  to  glorify  his  dear  and  bicffed  name.  Yet 
 I  was  glad  at  heart,  that  he  was  unchangeably  pofTeffed  of 
 glory  and  bleffednefs.  Oh  that  he  might  be  adored  and  praifed 
 by  all  his  intelligent  creatures,  to  the  utmoft  of  their  power 
 and  capacities  !  My  foul  would  have  rejoiced  to  fee  others 
 praife  him,  though  I  could  do  nothing  towards  it  myfelf. 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  fpeaks  of  his  being  fubjeft  to  fome  de- 
 gree 
 
ipa  T  H  E    L  I  F  E    O  F  A.D.  1746. 
 
 gree  of  melancholy ;  but  of  being  fomcthing  relieved  in  the 
 evening. 
 
 Friday,  June  6.  See  the  public  Journal.] 
 
 Saturday,  June  7. Rode  to  Freehold  to  aflift  Mr  Ten- 
 
 uent  in  the  adminiflration  of  the  Lord's  fupper.  In  the  af- 
 ternoon, preached  from  Pfal.  Ixxiii.  a8.  God  gave  me  fomc 
 freedom  and  warmth  in  my  difcourfe :  and  I  truft,  his  pre- 
 fence  was  in  the  aifembly.  Was  comfortably  compofed,  and 
 enjoyed  a  thankful  frame  of  fpirit;  and  my  foul  was  grieved 
 that  I  could  not  render  fomething  to  God  for  his  benefits  be- 
 flowed.     Oh  that  I  could  be  fwallowed  up  in  his  praife! 
 
 Lord's  day,  June  8.  Spent  much  time,  in  the  morning,  ia 
 fecret  duties;  but  between  hope  and  fear,  refpe<^ing  the  en- 
 joyment o^  God  in  the  bufincfs  of  the  day  then  before  us. 
 Was  agreeably  entertained,  in  the  forenoon,  by  a  difcourfe 
 fr.jm  Mr  Tennent,  and  felt  fomewhat  melted  and  refrelhcd. 
 In  the  feafon  of  communion,  enjoyed  fome  comfort;  and 
 efpecially  in  ferving  one  of  the  tables.  BleiTed  be  the  Lord, 
 II  was  a  thne  of  7tf  ejh'ng  to  me,  and  I  truft  to  many  others. 
 A  number  ot  my  dear  people  fat  down  by  themfelves  at  the 
 laft  table ;  at  which  time   God  feemed  to  be  in  the  midft  of 
 
 them. And  the  thoughts  of  what  God  had  done  among 
 
 them  were  refrefhing  and  melting  to  me.  In  the  afternoon, 
 God  enabled  me  to  preach  with  uncommon  freedom,  from 
 1  Cor.  V.  20.  Through  the  great  goodnefs  of  God,  I  was 
 favoured  with  a  conftant  flow  of  pertinent  matter,  and  pro- 
 per cxpreflions,  from  the  beginning  to  the  end  of  my  dit 
 c  'Urfe.  In  the  evening,  I  could  not  but  rejoice  in  God,  and 
 blefs  him  for  the  manifeftations  of  grace  in  the  day  paft. 
 Oh,  it  was  a  fweet  and  folemn  day  and  evening  I  a  feafon  of 
 comfort  to  the  godly,  and  of  awakening  to  fomc  fouls.  Oh 
 that  I  could  praife  the  Lord ! 
 
 Monday,  June  9.  Enjoyed  fome  fwcetnefs  in  fecret  duties. 
 — Preached  the  concluding  fcrmon  from  Gen.  v.  24.  "  And 
 "  Enoch  walked  with  God,"  <bc.  God  gave  me  enlargement 
 and  fervency  in  ray  difcourfe ;  io  that  I  was  enabled  to  fpeak 
 with  plainnefs  and  power ;  and  God's  prefence  feemed  to  be 
 in  the  affembly.  Praifed  be  the  Lord,  it  was  a  fweet  meet- 
 ing, a  defirable  alTembly.  I  found  my  ftrength  renewed,  and 
 lengthened  out,  even  to  a  wonder ;  fo  that  I  felt  much  ftrong- 
 cr  at  the  conclufion,  than  in  the  beginning  of  this  facraraental 
 folemnity.  I  have  great  reafon  to  blefs  God  lor  this  folem- 
 nity,  wherein  I  have  found  affiftancc  ia  addrelTing  others, 
 and  fweetnefs  in  my  own  foul, 
 
 [Or 
 
Bt.t9'      Mr     DAVID     BRAINERD.  193 
 
 [On  Tuefday,  he  found  himfelf  fpent,  and  his  fph-'its  ex- 
 haulled  by  his  lite  labours  ;  and  on  Wedncfday,  complains  of 
 vapoury  diforders,  and  dejection  of  fpirit,  and  of  enjoying 
 but  little  comfort  or  fpirituality.J 
 
 Thurfday,  June  12.  In  the  evening,  enjoyed  freedom  of 
 mind,  and  fome  fwcetnefs  in  fecret  prayer  :  it  was  a  dcfirable 
 feai'on  to  me ;  my  foul  was  enlarged  in  prayer  for  my  ov/n 
 dear  people,  and  for  the  enlargement  of  Chriit's  kingdom, 
 and  cfpecialiy  for  the  propagation  of  the  gofpel  among  the 
 Indians,  back  in  the  v/ildcrnefs.  Was  refreftied  in  prayer 
 for  dear  friends  in  New- England,  and  elfewhcre  :  I  found  it 
 fwect  to  pray  at  rhis  time  ;  and  could  with  all  my  heart  fay, 
 "   It  is  good  for  me  to  draw  near  Ho  God." 
 
 Fnday,  June   13. 1  came  away  from  the  meeting  of 
 
 the  Indians,  rhis  day,  rejoicmg  and  bieffing  God  for  his  grace 
 manifellsd  at  this  fcafon. 
 
 Saturday,  June  14.  Rode  to  Kingfton,  to  aflift  the  Rev. 
 Mr  Wales  in  the  adminiftration  of  the  Lord's  fupper.  In 
 the  afternoon,  preached ;  but  almoll  fainted  in  the  pulpit : 
 yet  God  ftrengthened  me  when  I  was  juft  gone,  and  enabled 
 me  to  fpeak  his  word  with  freedom,  fervency,  and  application 
 to  the  confcience.  And  praifed  be  the  Lord ;  *'  out  of  weak- 
 "  nefs  I  was  made  ftrong."  I  enjoyed  fome  fweetnefs,  in  and 
 after  public  worihip  ;  but  was  extremely  tired.  Oh,  how 
 many  are  the  mercies  of  the  Lord!  "  To  them  that  have  no 
 "  might,  he  increafeth  flrength." 
 
 Lord's  day,  June  15.  Was  in  a  deje6led  fpiritiefs  frame, 
 that  I  could  not  hold  up  my  head,  nor  look  any  body  in  the 
 face.  Adminiftered  the  Lord's  fupper  at  Mr  Wales's  defire  ; 
 and  found  myfelf  in  a  good  meafuvc  unburdened  and  relieved 
 of  my  prelling  load,  when  I  came  co  ?.fk  a  bleiTmg  on  the  ele- 
 ment'^ ;  here  God  gave  me  enlargement,  and  a  tender  aifcc- 
 tionate  fenfe  of  fpiritual  things ;  fo  that  it  was  a  feafon  of 
 comfort,  in  f~)me  meafure,  to  me,  and  I  trufl,  more  io  to 
 others.  In  the  afternoon,  preached  to  a  vail  multitude, 
 from  Rev.  xxii.  17.  '•  And  v^'hofocver  will,"  6c.  God  helped 
 me  to  offer  a  teflimony  for  himfelf,  and  to  leave  linners  inex- 
 cufeable  in  neglc(rting  his  grace.  I  v/as  enabled  to  fpeak  with 
 fuch  freedom,  fluency,  and  clearnefs,  as  commanded  the  at- 
 tention of  the  great.  Was  extremely  tired,  in  the  evening, 
 but  enjoyed  compofure  and  fweetnefs. 
 
 Monday,  June  16.  Preached  again;  and  God  helped  me 
 amazingly,  fo  that  this  was  a  fweet  refrefhlng  feafon  to  my 
 foul  and  others.     Oh,  for  svcr  blefTed  be  God  far  help  aiibrJ- 
 
1.94  THE     LIFE     OF  J.  D.  17^6, 
 
 ed  at  this  time,  when  my  body  was  fo  weak,  and  while  there 
 was  fo  large  an  allembly  to  hear.  Spent  the  afternoon  in  ? 
 comfortable  agreeable  manner. 
 
 [The  next  day  was  fpent  comfortably. 
 
 On  Wednefday,  he  went  to  a  meeting  of  minifters  at  Hope- 
 well. 
 
 Thurfday,  June  19.   See  his  public  Journal  *. 
 
 On  Friday  and  Saturday,  he  was  very  much  amifs ;  but  yet 
 preached  to  his  people  on  Saturdiy.  His  illnefs  continued 
 on  the  Sabbath  ;  but  he  preached,  notwith (landing,  to  his 
 people,  both  parts  of  the  day  :  and  after  the  public  worfhip 
 was  ended,  he  endeavoured  to  apply  divine  truths  to  the  con- 
 Icienccs  of  fome,  and  addrelled  them  perfonally  for  that  end  : 
 feveral  were  in  tears,  and  fome  appeared  much  affefted. 
 But  he  was  extremely  wearied  with  the  Icr vices  of  the  day> 
 and  was  fo  ill  at  night,  that  he  could  have  no  bodily  reft ;  but 
 remarks,  that  "  God  was  his  fupport,  and  that  he  was  not 
 '*  left  deftitute  of  comfort  in  him."  On  Monday,  he  con- 
 tinued very  ill ;  but  fpeaks  of  his  mind's  being  calm  and  com- 
 pofed,  refigned  to  the  divine  difpcnfations,  and  content  with 
 his  feeble  llate.  And  by  the  account  he  gives  of  himfelf,  the 
 remaining  part  of  this  week,  he  continued  very  feeble,  and 
 for  the  moft  part  dejefted  in  mind,  and  enjoyed  no  great 
 freedom  nor  fweetnefs  in  fpiritual  things ;  excepting  that 
 for  fome  very  fhort  fpaces  of  time  he  had  refrefhment  and 
 encouragement,  which  engaged  his  heart  on  divine  things  j 
 and  fometimes  his  heart  was  melted  with  fpiritual  affedion.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  June  29.    Preached,  both   parts  of  the  day, 
 from  John  xiv.  19.  "  Yet  a  little  while,  and  the  world  fceth 
 "  me  no  more,"  kdc.     God  was  plea  fed  to  aflift  me,  to  afford 
 me  both  freedom  and  power,  efpecially  towards  the  clofe  of  my 
 difcourfes,  both  forenoon  and  afternoon.    God's  power  appear- 
 '.  ed  in  the  aHcmbly,  in  both  exercifes.   Numbers  of  God's  people 
 .-^a  v/cre   refrellied  and  melted  with  divine  things ;  one  or  two 
 *-  comforted,  who  had  been  long  under  diftrefs:  convictions, 
 in  divers  inftances,  powerfully  revived  ;  and  one  man  in  years 
 much  awakened,  who  had  not  long  frequented  our  meeting, 
 and  appeared  before  as  ftupid  as  a  ftock.     God  amazingly  re- 
 newed and  lengthened  out  my  ftrcngth.   I  was  fo  fpent  at  noon, 
 that  I  could  fcarce  walk,  and  all  my  joints  trembled ;  fo  that 
 
 *  The  public  Journal  that  has  been  fo  often  referred  to,  con- 
 cludes widi  the  account  of  lliis  day. 
 
Mt.i^.      Mr.     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  195 
 
 I  could  not  fit,  nor  fo  much  as  hold  my  hand  flill :  and  yet 
 God  ftrengthened  me  to  preach  with  power  in  the  sfternoor. ; 
 although  I  had  given  out  word  to  my  people,  that  I  did  not 
 txpcft  to  be  able  to  do  it.  Spent  fjme  time  afterwards  in 
 converfing,  particularly,  with  fevcral  perfons,  about  their 
 fpiritual  ftate;  and  had  fome  fatisfaction  concerning  one  or 
 two.  Prayed  afterwards  with  a  fick  child,  and  gave  a  word 
 of  exhortation.  Was  aiufled  in  all  my  work.  BlcfTed  be 
 God.  Returned  home  with  m.ore  health,  than  T  went  ovx, 
 "With ;  although  my  linen  was  wringing  wet  upon  me,  from 
 a  little  after  ten  In  the  morning,  till  pafi:  five  in  the  afternoon. 
 My  Ipirits  alfo  were  confiderably  refrefhed  ;  and  my  foul  re- 
 joiced in  hope,  that  I  had  through  gr^ice  done  fomerhing  for 
 God.  In  the  evening,  walked  out,  and  enjoyed  a  fweet  fea- 
 fon  in  fecret  prayer  and  praife.  But  Oh,  I  found  the  truth 
 of  the  Pfalmift's  words,  "  My  goodncfs  exrendeth  not  to  thee !" 
 I  could  not  make  ajiy  returns  to  God  ;  I  longed  to  live  only 
 to  him,  and  to  be  in  tune  for  his  praife  and  fervice  for  ever. 
 Oh,  for  fpirituality  and  holy  fervencj',  that  I  might  ^//:'f;7^  and 
 be /pent  for  God  to  my  lateft  moment!. 
 
 Monday,  June  30.  Spent  the  day  in  writing ;  but  under 
 much  weaknefs  and  diforder.  Felt  the  labours  of  the  pre- 
 ceding day  ;  although  my  fplrits  v/ere  fo  refrefhcd  the  even- 
 ing before,  that  I  was  not  then  fenfible  of  my  being  fpent. 
 
 Tucfday,  July  i.  In  the  afternoon,  vifited,  and  preached 
 to  my  people,  from  Heb.  ix.  27.  on  occafion  of  fome  perfons 
 lying  at  the  point  of  death,  in  my  congregation.  God  gave 
 me  lome  alFiftance ;  and  his  word  made  fome  impreiTions  on 
 the  audience,  in  general.  This  was  an  agreeable  and  com- 
 fortable evening  to  ray  foul :  my  fpirits  were  fomewhat  re- 
 frefhcd, with  a  fmall  degree  of  freedom  and  help  enjoyed  in 
 my  work. 
 
 [On  Wednefday,  he  went  to  Newark,  to  a  meeting  of  the 
 Prelbytery  :  complains  of  lownefs  of  fpirits  ;  and  greatly  la- 
 ments his  fpending  his  time  fo  unfruitfully.  The  remaining 
 part  of  the  week  he  fpent  there,  and  at  Elifabeth-Town; 
 and  fpeaks  of  comfort  and  divine  ailiflance,  from  day  to 
 day :  but  yet  greatly  complains  for  want  of  more  fpiritual- 
 ity.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  July  6.  [At  Elifabeth-Town3  Enjoyed  fome 
 compolure  and  ferenity  of  mind,  in  the  m.orning:  heard  ]\U- 
 *Dickinfon  preach,  in  the  forenoon,  and  was  rcfreflied  with 
 his  difcourle;  was  in  a  malting  frame,  fome  part  of  the  time 
 
 B^b  2  of 
 
lff6  T  H  E    L  I  r  E     O  r  AD.  174$. 
 
 of  fermon  :  partook  cf  the  Lord's  fupper,  and  enjoyed  fomc 
 fcnfe  of  divine  thiings  in  that  ordinance.  In  the  atttrnoon,  I 
 preached  from  Ezck.  xxxiil.  11.  *'  As  I  live,  faith  the  Lord 
 "  God,"  6'c.  God  favoured  me  with  freedom  and  ferven- 
 cy ;  and  helped  me  to  plead  his  caufe,  beyond  my  own 
 pwwer. 
 
 Monday,  July  7.  My  fpirits  were  confidcrably  refrf  fhed 
 and  railed,  in  the  morning.  There  is  no  comfort,  I  find, 
 in  any  enjoyment,  without  enjoying  God  and  being  engaged 
 in  his  fervice.  In  the  evening,  had  the  moft  agreeable  con- 
 verfation  that  ever  I  remember  in  all  my  life,  upon  God's 
 being  all  in  all,  and  all  enjoyments  being  juft  that  to  us  which 
 God  makes  them,  and  no  more.  It  is  good  to  begin  and  end 
 with  God.  Oh,  how  does  a  fweet  folemnity  lay  a  founda- 
 tion for  true  pleafure  and  happincfb! 
 
 Tuefday,  July  S.  Rode  home,  and  enjoyed  fome  agreeable 
 meditations  by  the  way. 
 
 Wedncfday,  July  9.  Spent  the  day  in  writing,  enjoyed 
 fome  comfort  and  refrefliment  of  fpirit  in  my  evening  retire- 
 ment. 
 
 Thurfday,  July  10.  Spent  moft  of  the  day  in  writing-  To- 
 wards night,  rode  to  Mr  Tcnnent's  :  enjoyed  fome  agreeable 
 converfation  :  went  home,  in  the  evening,  in  a  folemn  fweet 
 frame  of  mind ;  was  refi  eflied  in  fecret  duties,  longed  to  live 
 wholly  and  only  for  God,  and  faw  plainly,  there  was  nothing 
 in  the  world  worth}^  of  my  afTcflion;  fo  that  my  heart  was 
 dead  to  all  below ;  yet  not  through  dejeflion,  as  at  fome 
 times,  but  from  views  of  a  better  inheritance. 
 
 Friday,  July  11.  Was  in  a  calm  compofed  frame,  in  the 
 morning,  efpecialJy  in  the  feafcn  of  my  fecret  retirement : 
 I  think,  I  was  well  pleafed  with  the  will  of  God,  whatever 
 it  was,  or  fhould  be,  in  all  reipefls  I  bad  then  any  thought 
 of.  Intending  to  aclminiftcr  the  Lord's  fuppcr  the  next 
 Lord's  day,  I  locked  to  Cod  for  his  prefcnce  and  affiftance 
 upon  that  occafion  ;  but  felt  a  oifpcfition  to  fay,  "  1  he  will 
 "  of  the  Lord  be  done,"  whether  it  be  to  give  mc  a/Tiflance, 
 or  not.  Spent  fomc  little  time  in  Vvriting:  vifited  the  In- 
 dians, and  fpcnt  fome  time  in  ferious  converfation  with  them; 
 thinking  it  not  befl  to  preach,  by  reafon  that  many  of  them 
 were  abfent. 
 
 Saturday,  July  12.  This  day  was  fpent  in  fading  and 
 prayer  by  my  congregation,  as  preparatory  to  the  facram.ent. 
 J  difcourfed,  both  parts  of  the  day,  irom  Rom.  iv.  25. 
 *'  Who  was  delivered  for  our  offences,"  d:f.  God  gave  mc 
 (bme  affiftancc  in  my   difcourfes,  and   fomcthing  of  divine 
 
 powc|^ 
 
^/.  £9.     Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  ipy 
 
 power  attended  the  word;  fo  that  this  was  an  agreeable  fea- 
 ion.  Afcervi^ards  led  them  to  a  fulemn  renewal  ot  their  cove- 
 jnant,  and  freih  dedication  of  themfelves  to  God.  "1  his 
 was  a  fcafon  both  of  lolemnity  and  fweetnefs,  and  God 
 feemed  to  be  "  in  the  midii:  of  u,s."  Returned  to  my  lodgings, 
 )n  the  evening,  in  a  comfortable  frame  of  mind. 
 
 Lord's  day,  July  13.  In  the  forenoon,  dilcourfed  on  the 
 bread  of  I  fey  froin  John  vi.  35.  -God  gave  me  fome  aC- 
 liftincv;,  in  part  of  my  difcourfe  efpecially  ;  and  there  appear- 
 ed foine  tender  aff'eftion  in  the  affembly  under  divine  truths  ; 
 my  foul  alfo  was  fomewhat  refredied.  AdminiHered  the 
 facrament  of  the  Lord's  fupper  to  thirty-one  pcrfons  of  the 
 Indians.  (}od  feemed  to  be  prefent  in  this  ordinance  ;  the 
 cominunicants  were  fweetly  melted  and  refrefhed,  moll  of 
 them.  Oh,  how  they  melted,  even  when  the  elements  were 
 firfl  uncovered !  There  was  fcarcely  a  dry  eye  among  them, 
 when  i  took  off  the  linen,  and  fhewed  them  the  fymbols  of 
 Chriji's  broken  body. Having  refted  a  little,  after  the  ad- 
 mi  niftration  o\  tie  facrament,  I  vifited  the  communicants, 
 and  found  them  generally  in  a  fvveet  loving  frame;  not  un- 
 like what  appeared  among  them  on  the  former  facramental 
 occafion,  on  April  27.  In  the  afternoon,  difcourfed  upon 
 coming  to  ChriJ},  and  the  fatisfc&ion  of  thofe  who  do  fo, 
 from  the  fame  verfe  I  infilled  on  in  the  forenoon.  This  was 
 likewife  an  agreeable  feafon,  a  feafon  of  much  tendernefs, 
 afFeftion,  and  enlargement  in  divine  fervice :  and  God,  I  am 
 perfuaded,  crowned  our  afiembly  with  his  divine  prefence. 
 I  returned  home  much  fpent,  yet  rejoicing  in  the  goodnefs  of 
 God. 
 
 Monday,  July  14.  Went  to  my  people,  and  difcourfed  to 
 them  from  Pfal.  cxix.  106.  "  I  have  fworn,  and  I  will  per- 
 "  form  it,''  6c.  Obfcrved,  1.  That  -AlGodiS  judgments  ot 
 commandments  are  righteous.  1.  That  God's  people  have 
 fworn  to  keep  them;  and  this  they  do  efpecially  at  the  Lord's 
 fable.  There  appeared  to  be  a  powerful  divine  influence  on 
 the  alTembly,  and  confiderable  melting  under  the  word.  Af- 
 terwards, I  led  them  to  a  renewal  of  their  covenant  before 
 Cod,  (that  they  would  watch  over  themfelves  and  one  ano- 
 ther, left:  they  fliould  fall  into  fin  and  diilionour  the  name 
 of  Chrift:),  juft  as  I  did  on  Monday,  April  9,3.  This  tranfaftion 
 was  attended  with  great  folemnity :  and  God  fccmt^d  to  own 
 it  by  exciting  in  them  a  fear  and  jealoufy  of  themfelves,  left 
 they  fliould  fin  againft  God;  fo  that  the  prefence  of  God  feem- 
 ed to  be  amongft  us  in  this  conclufion  of  the  facramental  fo- 
 lemnity, 
 
 CThe 
 
spt  rnttiftoi^       jf.D.  1746. 
 
 [The  next  day,  lie  f«t  out  on  a  journey  towards  Philadel- 
 phia ;  from  whence  he  did  not  return  till  Saturday.  He  went 
 ^is  journey,  and  fpent  the  week,  under  a  great  degree  of  ill* 
 jicfs  of  body,  and  dejedion  of  mind.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  July  20.  Preached  twice  to  my  people,  from 
 John  xvii.  24.  "  Father,  I  will  that  they  alfo  whom  thou 
 *'  haft  given  me,  be  with  me,  where  I  am,  that  they  may 
 "  behold  my  glory,  which  thou  haft  given  me."  Was  help- 
 ed to  difcourfe  with  great  clearnefs  and  plainnefs  in  the  fore- 
 lioon.  In  the  afternoon,  enjoyed  fome  tendernefs,  and  fpake 
 "With  fome  influence.  Divers  were  in  tears;  and  fome,  to 
 appearance,  in  diftrefs. 
 
 Monday,  July  21.  Preached  to  the  Indians,  chiefly  for  the 
 ^ake'of  [omcj^rangers.  Then  propofed  my  defign  of  taking 
 *  journey  fpcedily  to  Sufquahannah :  exhorted  my  people  to 
 pray  for  me,  that  God  would  be  with  me  in  that  journey, 
 <^r.  Then  chofe  divers  perfons  of  the  congregation  to  travel 
 ■with  me.  Afterwards,  fpent  time  in  difcourfing  to  the 
 firangerr,  and  was  fomewhat  encouraged  with  them.  Took 
 earc  of  my  people's  fecular  bufmefs,  and  was  not  a  little  ex- 
 ^rcifed  v;ith  it.  Had  fome  degree  of  compofure  and  comfort 
 in  fecret  retirement. 
 
 Tuefday,  July  22.  Was  in  a  dejected  frame,  moft  of  the 
 «3ay  :  wanted  to  wear  out  life,  and  have  it  at  an  end ;  but  had 
 fome  dcflres  of  living  to  Cod,  and  wearing  out  life  for  him. 
 Oh  that  I  could  indeed  do  fo ! 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  went  to  Eli fabeth- Town,  to  a  meeting 
 of  the  Prelbytery;  and  fpent  this,  and  Thurfday,  and  the 
 former  part  of  Friday,  under  a  very  great  degree  of  me- 
 lancholy, and  exceeding  gloominefs  of  mind  ;  not  through  any 
 fear  of  future  punishment,  but  as  being  diftrefled  with  a  fenfe- 
 JefTnefs  of  all  good,  fo  that  the  whole  world  appeared  empty 
 and  gloomy  to  him.  But  in  the  latter  part  of  Friday,  he  was 
 greatly  relieved  and  comforted.] 
 
 Saturday,  July  26.  Was  comfortable  in  the  morning  ;  my 
 countenance  and  heart  were  not  fad,  as  in  days  paft ;  enjoyed 
 fome  fwcetnefs  in  lifting  up  my  heart  to  God.  Rode  home 
 to  my  people,  and  was  in  a  comfortable  pleafant  frame  by  the 
 way ;  my  fpirirs  v/cre  much  relieved  of  their  burden,  and  I 
 felt  fice  to  go  through  all  difficulties  and  labours  in  my  Ma- 
 ftci's  fervice. 
 
 Lord's  day,  July  27.  Difcourfed  to  my  people,  in  the  fore- 
 noon. 
 
JKi.i^.     Mr    DAVID    B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  19^ 
 
 noon,  from  Luke  xii.  37.  on  the  duty  and  benefit  of  watch* 
 ing:  God  helped  me  in  the  latter  part  of  my  difcourfe,  and 
 the  power  of  God  appeared  in  the  afTembly.  In  the  afternoon, 
 difcourfed  from  Luke  xiii.  25.  Here  aUo  I  enjoyed  fome  af- 
 Cftance,  and  the  Spirit  of  God  fecmed  to  attend  what  was 
 fpokcn,  fo  that  there  was  a  great  folemnity,  and  fome  tear* 
 among  Indians  and  others. 
 
 Monday,  July  28.  Was  very  weak,  and  fcarce  able  to 
 perform  any  bufinefb  at  all ;  but  enjoyed  fwcctnefs  and  com- 
 fort in  prayer,  both  morning  and  evening ;  and  was  compofed. 
 and  comfortable  through  the  day  :  my  mind  was  intenfe,  and 
 my  heart  fervent,  at  leaft  in  foaie  degree,  in  fecret  duties; 
 and  I  longed  to  fpend  and  be  fpeni  for  God. 
 
 Tuefday,  July  29.  My  mind  was  cheerful,  and  free  from 
 thofe  melancholy  damps,  that  1  am  often  exercifed  with  :  had 
 freedom  in  looking  up  to  God,  at  fundry  times  in  the  day.  In 
 the  evening,  I  enjoyed  a  comfortable  feafon  in  fecret  prayer; 
 was  helped  to  plead  with  God  for  my  own  dear  people,  that 
 he  would  carry  on  his  own  blefled  work  among  them ;  was 
 affifted  alfo  in  praying  for  the  divine  prefence  to  attend  mc 
 in  my  intended  journey  to  Sufquahannah  ;  was  alfo  helped  to 
 remember  dear  brethren  and  friends  in  New- England:  fcarce 
 knew  how  to  leave  the  throne  of  grace,  and  it  grieved  me  that 
 I  was  obliged  to  go  to  bed ;  I  longed  to  do  fomething  for  God, 
 but  knew  not  how.  Blefied  be  God  for  this  freedom  from 
 dejeftion. 
 
 Wednefday,  July  30.  Was  uncommonly  comfortable,  both 
 in  body  and  mind  ;  in  the  forenoon  efpecially  :  my  mind  was 
 folemn,  I  was  affifted  in  my  work,  and  God  feemed  to  be  near 
 to  me ;  fo  that  the  day  was  as  comfortable  as  mod  I  have  enjoy- 
 ed for  fome  time.  In  the  evening,  was  favoured  with  allift- 
 ance  in  fecret  prayer,  and  felt  much  as  I  did  the  evening  before. 
 Blefled  be  God  for  that  freedom  I  then  enjoyed  at  the  throne 
 of  grace,  for  myfelf,  my  people,  and  my  dear  friends,  "It  is 
 **  good  for  me  to  draw  near  to  God." 
 
 [Re  feems  to  have  continued  very  much  in  the  fame  free^ 
 «omfortable  (late  of  mind  the  next  day.] 
 
 Friday,  Auguft  i.  In  the  evening,  enjoyed  a  fweet  feafon 
 in  fecret  prayer;  clouds  of  darknefs  and  perplexing  care  were 
 fwcetly  fcattered,  and  nothing  anxious  remained.  Oh,  how 
 ferene  was  my  mind  at  this  feafon !  how  free  from  that  di- 
 ftrafting  concern  I  have  often  felt!  "  Thy  will  be  done,"  was 
 a  petition  fwcet  to  my  foul;  and  if  God  had  bidden  rae  chufc 
 
 for 
 
200  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  ^  D.  174^, 
 
 for  myfelf  in  any  affair,  I  (houlJ  hare  chofen  rather  to  have 
 referred  the  choice  to  him;  fox  1  {xw  he  was  infinitely  wile, 
 and  could  not  dj  any  thing  amifs,  as  1  was  in  danger  of  do- 
 ing. Was  affifted  in  prayer,  for  my  dear  fiock,  that  God 
 would  promote  his  own  work  among  them,  and  that  God 
 would  go  with  me  in  my  intended  journey  to  Suiquahannah; 
 was  helped  to  remember  dear  friends  in  New-England,  and  my 
 dear  brethren  in  the  miniftry.  I  found  enough  in  the  fweet 
 duty  of  prayer  to  have  engaged  me  to  continue  m  it  the  whole 
 night,  would  my  bodily  ftate  have  admitted  of  it.  Oh,  how 
 fweet  it  is,  to  be  enabled  heartily  to  fay,  '■'■  Lord,  not  my 
 *'  will,  but  thine  be  done !"   . 
 
 Saturday,  Augufl  2.  Near  night,  preached  from  Matth. 
 xi.  29.  Was  conliderably  helped;  and  the  prefencc  of  God 
 feemed  to  be  fomewhat  remaikably  in  the  afTembly ;  divine 
 truths  made  powerful  impreflions,  both  upon  faints  and  fiti- 
 ners.  BlefTed  be  God  for  fuch  a  revival  among  us.  In  the 
 evening,  was  very  weary,  but  found  my  fpirits  lupported  and 
 rcfrefhed. 
 
 Lord's  day,  Augufl  3.  Difcourfed  to  my  people,  in  the 
 forenoon,  from  Col.  iii.  4.  obferved,  that  Chriji  is  the  belie- 
 ver's life.  God  helped  me,  and  gave  me  his  prefence  in  this 
 difcourfe;  and  it  was  a  fealon  of  confiderable  power  in  the 
 afTembly.  In  the  afternoon,  preached  from  Luke  xix.  41. 
 42.  I  enjoyed  fome  afTiftance  ;  though  not  fo  mucn  as  in  the 
 forenoon.  In  the  evening,  I  enjoyed  freedom  and  fweetnefs 
 in  fecret  prayer ;  God  enlarged  my  heart,  freed  me  from  me- 
 lancholy damps,  and  gave  me  fatisfaflion  in  drawing  near  to 
 himfelf.  Oh  that  my  foul  could  magnify  the  Lord,  for  thefe 
 feafons  of  compofure  and  rcfignation  to  his  will! 
 
 Monday,  i\.uguft  4.  Spent  the  day  in  writing ;  enjoyed 
 much  freedom  and  aflillance  in  my  work  :  was  in  a  corapoled 
 and  comfortable  frame,  moft  of  the  day ;  and  in  the  evening 
 enjoyed  fome  fweetnefs  in  prayer.  BlefTed  be  God,  my  fpi- 
 lits  were  yet  up,  and  I  w  as  free  from  finking  damps ;  as  I 
 have  been  in  general  ever  f  nc^  I  came  from  Elifabcth-Town 
 iafl.     Oh  what  a  mercy  is  thi- ! 
 
 Friday,  Augufl  5.  Towards  night,  preached  at  the  funeral 
 of  one  of  my  Cnriflians,  from  If.  l\ii.  2.  was  opprefTed  wich 
 the  nervous  head  ach,  and  confidTably  deje^Tted :  however, 
 had  a  little  freedom,  fome  part  of  the  time  I  was  difcourfing. 
 Was  extremely  weary  in  the  evening;  but  notwith Handing 
 enjoyed  fome  liberty  and  chccrfulnefs  of  mind  in  prayer ;  and 
 found  the  dejeftioa  tliat  I  feared,  much  removed,  and  my 
 fpirits  confiderably  refrefhed. 
 
mu  29.      Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  202 
 
 [rle  continued  in  a  very  coTifortable  cheerful  frame  of 
 mLii  the  next  da}^,  with  his  heart  enlarged  in  the  fervice  of 
 God.] 
 
 ThurfJay,  Augufl  7.  Rode  to  my  houfe,  where  I  fpent 
 the  lad  vviater,  in  order  to  bring  fome  things  I  needed  for  my 
 Sjfquahan  lah  journey  :  was  reireflied  to  iee  that  place,  which 
 \jii  To  narvelloully"  vifitcd  with  the  fhowers  of  his  grace. 
 Oh  hoiV  anazingly  did  the  powdT  c/  Cod  often  appear  there! 
 "  Blcfs  the  Lord,  O  my  foul,  and  forget  not  ail  his  bcnc- 
 ''  fics." 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  fpcaks  of  liberty,  enlargement,  and 
 fwectnefo  of  mind,  in  prayer  and  religious  converlation.] 
 
 Saturday,  Auguft  9.  In  the  afternoon,  vlfited  my  people ; 
 fet  their  aifairs  in  order,  as  much  as  pofTibie,  and  contrived 
 for  then  the  management  of  their  worldly  bL-finei's;  djic.^ur- 
 fed  to  them  in  a  folemn  manner,  and  concluded  with  prayer. 
 Was  compofed,  and  comfortable  in  the  eveniijg,  and  lome- 
 what  fervent  in  fecrct  prayer :  had  iome  fcnfe  and  ^iew  of 
 the  eternal  world,  and  found  a  ferenity  of  mind.  Oh  that  I 
 could  magnify  the  Lord  for  any  freedoiii  he  atfords  mc  in 
 prayer! 
 
 Lord's  day,  Auguft  10.  Difourfed  to  my  people,  both 
 parts  of  the  day,  from  A£ls  iii.  19.  In  difcourfmg  •d  'i c^ent- 
 ance,  in  the  forenoon,  God  help:;d  me,  fo  that  my  dilourfe 
 was  fearching,  fome  were  in  tears,  both  of  the  Indians  and 
 white  people  ;  and  the  word  of  God  was  attended  with  fome 
 power.  In  tlie  intermiifion-feafon,  1  was  engaged  in  difcour- 
 llng  to  fome  in  order  to  their  baptifm;  as  well  as  with  one 
 who  had  then  lately  met  with  fome  comfort,  after  fpiritual 
 tr.)uble  and  diflrefs.  In  the  afternoon,  v<'as  fomewhat  affifled 
 again,  though  weak  and  weary.  Aftet^wards  baptized  fix 
 perfons;  three  adults,  and  three  chilihen.  Was  in  a  com- 
 fortable frame  in  the  evening,  and  enjoyed  fome  fatisfafti  .n 
 in  lecret  prayer.  I  icarce  ever  in  my  lire  felt  myfclf  ^o  full 
 of  tendernefs,  as  this  day. 
 
 Monday,  Augufl:  1 1.  Being  about  to  (ct  out  on  a  journey 
 to  Sufquahannah  the  next  day,  with  leave  of  Providence,  I 
 fpent  fome  time  this  day  in  prayer  with  my  people,  that  God 
 would  blefs  and  fucceed  nay  intended  journey  ;  that  he  would 
 fend  forth  his  blelfed  Spirit  with  his  v^ord,  and  fct  up  his 
 kingdom  among  the  poor  Indians  in  the  v/ildcjncfs.  While 
 i  was  opening  and  applying  part  ot  the  c:ith  and  iid  Pfalriis, 
 
 C  c  the 
 
202  T  H  E     L  I  r  E     O  F  yi.  D.  1746. 
 
 the  power  of  God  fccmed  to  defccnd  on  the  aflembly  in  fome 
 mcafurc ;  and  while  I  was  making  the  firfl  prayer,  numbers 
 Averc  melted,  and  I  found  fome  alteftionate  enlargement  of 
 foul  myfelf.  Preached  from  Afts  iv.  31.  God  helped  me, 
 and  my  interpreter  alfo :  there  was  a  fhaking  and  melting 
 among. us;  and  divers,  I  doubt  not,  were  in  fome  meafurc 
 "  filled  with  the  Holy  Ghofl:."  Afterwards,  Mr  Macknight 
 prayed  :  I  then  opened  the  two  laft:  ftanza's  of  the  Ixxiid  Pfalm ; 
 at  which  time  God  was  prefent  with  us  ;  efpecially  while  I 
 infifted  upon  the  promife  of  all  nations  hlcffing  the  great  Re- 
 deemer: my  foul  was  refrefhed,  to  think,  that  this  day,  this 
 bleffed  glorious  feafon  fhould  furely  come;  and  I  truft,  num- 
 bers of  my  dear  people  were  alfo  refrefhed.  Afterwards 
 prayed;  had  fome  freedom,  but  was  almoft  fpent:  then 
 walked  out,  and  left  my  people  to  carry  on  religious  exercifes 
 among  themfelves .'  they  prayed  repeatedly,  and  fung,  while  I 
 rcfted  and  refrelhcd  myfelf.  Afterwards,  went  to  the  meet- 
 ing; prayed  with,  and  difmi/fed  the  affembly.  Blefied  be  God, 
 this  has  been  a  day  of  grace.  There  were  many  tears  and 
 affectionate  ffcbs  among  us  this  day.  In  the  evening,  my 
 foul  was  refrefhed  in  prayer  :  enjoyed  liberty  at  the  throne  of 
 grace,  in  praying  for  my  people  and  friends,  and  the  church 
 of  God  in  general.     "  Blefs  the  Lord,   O  my  foul." 
 
 [The  next  day,  he  fet  out  on  his  journey  towards  Sufqua- 
 hannah,  and  iix  of  his  Chriflian  Indians  with  him,  whom  he 
 had  chofen  out  of  his  congregation,  as  thofe  that  he  jiidged 
 mofl:  fit  to  aflift  him  in  the  bufmefs  he  was  going  upon.  He 
 took  his  way  through  Philadelphia;  intending  to  go  to  Suf- 
 quahannah-iiver,  far  down  along,  where  it  is  fettled  by  the 
 white  people,  below  the  country  inhabited  by  the  Indians  j 
 and  io  to  travel  up  the  river  to  the  Indian  habitations :  for 
 although  this  was  much  farther  about,  yet  hereby  he  avoid- 
 ed the  huge  mountains,  and  hideous  wilderncfs,  that  muft  be 
 crofTcd  in  the  nearer  way  ;  which  in  time  pafl  he  had  found 
 to  be  extremely  diificult  and  fatiguing.  He  rode  this  week  as 
 fir  as  Charlcftown,  a  place  of  that  name  about  thirty  miles 
 weftward  of  Philadelphia  ;  where  he  arrived  on  Friday  :  and 
 ia  his  way  hither,  was  for  the  moft  part  in  a  compofed  com- 
 fortable ftate  of  mind.] 
 
 Saturday,  Auguft   16.    [At  Charleftown.]  It  being  a  day 
 kept  by  tlse  people  of  the  place  where  I  now  was,  as  prepara- 
 tory to  the  celebration  of  the  Lord's  fupper,  I  tarried  ;  heard 
 J'ir  I'rcat  preach  ;  and  then  preached  myfelf.     God  g. ve  me 
 /  fome 
 
 / 
 
JEt.1^.       M  R    D  A  V  I  D     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  2,03 
 
 fomc  good  degree  of  freedom,  and  helped  me  to  difcourfc 
 with  warmth,  and  application,  to  the  confcicnce.  After- 
 wards, I  was  refrelhcd  in  fpirit,  though  much  tired ;  and 
 fpent  the  evening  agreeably,  having  fome  freedom  in  prayer, 
 as  well  as  Chriflian  converlation. 
 
 Lord's  day,  Augull  17.  Enjoyed  liberty,  compofure,  and 
 fatisfaftion,  in  the  fecret  duties  of  the  morning :  had  my 
 heart  fomewhat  enlarged  in  prayer  for  dear  friends,  as  well 
 as  for  myfelf.  In  the  forenoon,  attended  Mr  Treat's  preach- 
 ing, partook  of  the  Lord's  fupper,  five  of  my  people  alio  com- 
 municating in  this  holy  ordinance :  I  enjoyed  fome  enlarge- 
 ment and  outgoing  of  foul  in  this  feafon.  In  the  afternoon, 
 preached  from  Ezek.  xxxiii.  11.  Enjoyed  not  fo  much  fenfi- 
 ble  afliftancc  as  the  day  before  ;  however,  was  helped  to  fome 
 fervency  in  addrclTmg  immortal  fouls.  Was  fomewhat  con- 
 founded in  the  evening,  becaufe  I  thought  I  had  done  little  or 
 nothing  for  God;  yet  enjoyed  fome  refrcfliment  of  fpirit  in 
 Chriftian  converfation  and  prayer.  Spent  the  evening,  till 
 near  mid-night,  in  religious  exercifes ;  and  found  rny  bodily 
 ftrength,  which  was  much  fpent  when  I  came  from  the  public 
 worfhip,  fomcthing  renewed  before  I  went  to  bed. 
 
 Monday,  Auguft  i8.  Rode  on  my  way  towards  Paxton, 
 upon  Sufquahannah-river.  Felt  my  fpirits  fmk,  towards 
 night,  fo  that  I  had  little  comfort. 
 
 Tuefday,  Auguft  19.  Rode  forward  (till;  and  at  night 
 lodged  by  the  fide  of  Sufquahannah.  Was  weak  and  diforder- 
 cd  both  this  and  the  preceding  day,  and  found  my  fpirits  con- 
 iiderably  damped,  meeting  with  none  that  I  thought  godly 
 people. 
 
 Wedncfday,  Auguft  20.  Having  lain  in  a  cold  fweat  all 
 night,  I  coughed  much  bloody  matter  this  morning,  and  was 
 under  great  difordcr  of  body,  and  not  a  little  melancholy ;  but 
 what  gave  me  fome  encouragement,  was,  I  had  a  fecret  hope 
 that  I  might  fpeedily  get  a  clifmiiTion  from  earth,  and  all  its 
 toils  and  forrows.  Rode  this  day  to  one  Chambers's,  upon 
 Sufquahannah,  and  there  lodged.  Was  much  aifli^ted,  in  the 
 evening,  with  an  ungodly  crew,  drinking,  fwearing,  6c.  Oh, 
 what  a  hell  v/ould  it  be,  to  be  numbered  with  the  ungodly!  En- 
 joyed fome  agreeable  converfation  with  a  traveller,  who  feem- 
 cd  to  have  fome  relilh  of  true  religion. 
 
 Thurfday,  Auguft   21.  Rode   up    the  river  about   fifteen 
 miles,  and  there  lodged,  in  a  family  that  appeared  quite  defti-. 
 tute  of  God.     Laboured  to  difcourfe  with  the  man  about  the 
 life  of  religion,  but   found  him  very   artful  in  evading  fuch 
 converfation.     Oh,   what  a  death  it  is  to  fome,  ta  hear  of 
 
 C  c  2  the 
 
204  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  AT).  174^. 
 
 the  things  r.fCod.'     Was  out  of  my  element;  but  was  not  fo 
 ciejefted  as  at  ^omc  times. 
 
 Friday,  Augufl:  22.  Continued  my  couiTe  up  the  river; 
 my  people  now  being  with  me,  who  before  were  parted  from 
 me :  travelled  above  all  the  Englifli  fettlements ;  at  night, 
 I-^dg.'d  in  'he  open  woods  ;  and  Ikpt  with  more  comfort,  than 
 while  among  an  ungodly  company  of  white  people.  Enjoyed 
 fbne  liberty  in  fccret  prayer,  this  evening  ;  and  was  helped  to 
 rcin.einber  dear  fi  lends,  as  well  as  my  dear  flock,  and  the 
 church  of  God  in  general. 
 
 Saturday,  Augufl:  23.  /irrived  at  the  Indian  town,  called 
 Shaiiiiioking,  near  night.  Was  not  fj  dejecied  as  formerly ; 
 but  yet  foraewhat  exercifed.  Felt  fc.mewhat  con^poled  in 
 the  evening;  enjoyed  fome  freedom  in  leaving  my  r//.' with 
 G-)J:  t-.rough  the  great  goodnefs  of  God,  I  enjojred  iome 
 liberty  of  mind  ;  was  not  dilhelTed  with  adelpondency^  as  lre« 
 quently  heretofore. 
 
 Lord's  day,  Auguft  24.  Towards  noon,  vifited  fome  of 
 the  Delawares,  and  difcourfed  with  them  about  ChiilHanity- 
 In  the  afternoon,  difcourfed  to  the  K.ng,  and  others,  upon 
 divine  things;  who  feemed  difpoled  to  hear.  Spent  nicft  of 
 the  day  in  thefe  exercifes.  In  the  evening,  enjoyed  fome 
 comfort  and  fatisfa<ftion  ;  and  efpecially  had  Iome  Iwcetnefs 
 in  fecret  prayer:  this  duty  was  m.ade  lb  agreeable  tome, 
 that  I  loved  to  walk  abroad  and  repeatedly  engage  in  it.  Oh, 
 how  comfortable  is  a  little  glim-pfe  of  God ! 
 
 Monday,  Auguft  25.  vSpent  moft  of  the  day  in  writing. 
 Sent  out  my  people  that  were  with  me,  to  talk  with  the  In- 
 dians, and  contract  a  friendHiip  and  familiarity  with  them, 
 that  I  might  have  a  better  opportunity  of  treating  with  them 
 about  Chriflianity.  Some  guod  feemed  to  be  done  by  their 
 vilit'^  this  da}',  divers  appeared  willing  to  heaiken  to  Chrilti- 
 anlty.  My  fpirits  were  a  little  refrelhed,  this  evening ;  and 
 I  found  fome  liberty  and  fatisfadlion  in  prayer. 
 
 Tuefday,  Auguft  26.  About  noon,  dilcourfed  to  a  confi- 
 derable  number  of  Indians  :  God  helped  me,  I  am  perfuaded ; 
 I  was  enabled  to  fpeak  with  much  plainnefs,  and  fome  warmth 
 -rod  power.  The  difcourfe  had  imprelTion  upon  fome,  and 
 made  tl  em  appear  very  ferious.  T  thought,  things  now  ap- 
 peared as  encouraging,  as  they  did  at  Crofwetks.  At  the 
 time  of  m.y  firfl  vifit  to  thofe  Indians,  I  was  a  little  encou- 
 raged :  I  prelfed  things  with  all  my  might ;  and  called  out  my 
 people,  who  were  then  prefent,  to  give  in  their  ttfiimcitiy  for 
 CJod  ;  which  they  did.  Towards  night,  was  refrelhed ;  feh 
 3  heart  to  pray  for  the  fitting  up  ot  God's  kingdom  here ;  as 
 
JEt.  29.       M  R     DA  V  I  D     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  205 
 
 well  as  for  my  dear  congregation  below,  and  my  dear  friends 
 clfewhere. 
 
 Wednefday,  Auguft  27.  There  having  been  a  thick  fmoak, 
 in  the  houfe  where  I  lodged  all  night  before,  whereby  I  was 
 almoft  choked,  I  was  this  morning  diftrelfed  with  pains  in 
 my  head  and  neck,  and  could  have  no  reft.  In  the  morn- 
 ing, the  fmoak  was  ftill  the  fame ;  and  a  cold  eafteriy  ftorm 
 gathering,  I  could  neither  live  within  doors  nor  without  any 
 long  time  together ;  I  wa-s  pierced  with  the  rawnefs  of  the 
 air  abroad,  in  the  houfe  diftrefTed  with  the  fmoak.  I  was 
 this  day  very  vapoury,  and  li\cd  in  great  diftrefs,  and  had  not 
 health  enough  to  do  any  thing  to  any  purpofe. 
 
 Thurlday,  Auguft  28.  In  the  forenoon  was  under  great 
 concern  of  mind  ab.^ut  my  woik.  Was  vifited  by  lome  who 
 delired  to  hear  me  preach  ;  dilcourfed  to'  them,  in  the  alter- 
 noon,  with  fome  fervency,  and  laboured  to  perfuade  thtm  to 
 ty.rn  to  God.  VV^a.-  fill  ot  concern  for  the  kingdom  of  Chrift, 
 and  found  fome  enlargement  of  foul  in  prayer,  both  in  lecret 
 and  in  my  family.  Scarce  ever  lav/  more  clearly,  than  this 
 day,  that  it  is  God's  lu'jrk  to  convert  fouls,  and  elpecially 
 pjor  Heathens.-  I  knew,  I  could  not  touch  them;  1  faw,  I 
 could  only  Ipeak  to  dry  bo7tes,  but  could  give  them  no  fenfe 
 of  what  I  faid.  My  eyes  were  up  to  God  for  help  :  I  could 
 fay,  the  work  was  h  s;  and  if  done,    the ^/ory  would  be  /;.'/. 
 
 Friday,  Auguft  29.  Felt  the  fame  concern  of  mmd,  as  the 
 day  before.  Lnjoyed  fome  freedom  in  prayer,  and  a  latif- 
 faftion  to  leave  all  with  God.  Travelled  to  the  Delav/ares, 
 found  few  at  home  :  felt  poorly,  but  was  able  to  fpend  fome 
 time  alone  in  reading  God's  word  and  in  prayer,  and  enjoyed 
 fome  fweetnefs  in  thefe  cxercifes.  In  the  evening,  was  afiift- 
 ed  repeatedly  in  prayer,  and  found  fome  comfort  in  coming 
 to  the  throne  of  gi  ace. 
 
 Saturday,  Auguft  3d.  Spent  the  forenoon  in  vifiting  a 
 trader,  that  came  djwn  the  t'lvcx  Jick  ;  who  appeared  as  ig- 
 norant as  any  Indian.  In  the  afternoon,  fpent  fome  time  in 
 writing,  reading,  an  1  prayer. 
 
 Lord's  day,  Auguft  31.  Spent  much  time,  in  the  morning, 
 in  fecrct  duties :  found  a  weight  upon  my  fpirit?,  and  could 
 not  but  cry  to  God  v/ith  concern  and  engagement  of  foul. 
 Spent  fome  time  alfo  in  reading  and  expounding  God's  word 
 to  my  dear  family,  that  was  with  me,  as  well  as  in  fmging  and 
 prayer  with  them.  Afterwards,  fpake  the  word  of  God,  to 
 fome  few  of  the  Sufquahannah- Indians.  In  the  afternoon, 
 felt  very  weak  and  feeble.  Near  night,  was  fomething  re- 
 freilied  in  mind,  with  fome  views  of  things  relating  to  my 
 
 grtat 
 
io6  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F  ^.  Z>.  1746. 
 
 great  work.  Oh,  how  heavy  is  my  work,  v/htn  faith  cannot 
 take  hold  of  an  almighty  arm,  for  the  performance  of  it: 
 many  times  have  I  been  ready  to  fmk  in  this  cafe.  Bleffed  be 
 God,  that  I  may  repair  to  a  fuU  fountain. 
 
 Monday,  September  i.  Set  out  on  a  journey  towards  a 
 place  called  The  great  ijland,  about  fifty  miles  diftant  from 
 Shaumoking,  in  the  north-weftern  branch  of  Sufquahannah. 
 Travelled  fomc  part  of  the  way,  and  at  night  lodged  in  the 
 woods.  Was  exceeding  feeble,  this  day,  and  fweat  much  the 
 night  following. 
 
 Tuefday,  September  2.  Rode  forward;  but  no  faftcr 
 than  my  people  went  on  foot.  Was  very  weak,  on  this  as 
 well  as  the  preceding  days  :  was  fo  feeble  and  faint,  that  I 
 fcaied  it  would  kill  me  to  lie  out  in  the  open  air ;  and  fomc 
 of  our  company  being  parted  from  us,  fo  that  we  had  now  no 
 axe  with  us,  I  had  noway  but  to  climb  into  a  young  pine- tree, 
 and  with  my  knife  to  lop  the  branches,  and  fo  made  a  fheltcr 
 from  the  dew.  But  the  evening  being  cloudy,  and  very  likely 
 for  rain,  I  was  flill  under  fears  of  being  extremely  expofed  : 
 fweat  much  in  the  night,  fo  that  my  linen  was  almofl  wring- 
 ing wet  all  night.  I  fcarce  ever  was  more  weak  and  weary, 
 than  this  evening,  when  I  was  able  to  fit  up  at  all.  This 
 was  a  melancholy  fituation  I  was  in ;  but  I  endeavoured  to 
 quiet  myfelf  with  confiderations  of  the  poiTibility  of  my  being 
 in  much  worfe  circumflances,  amongft  enemies,  6c. 
 
 Wednefday,  September  3.  Rode  to  the  Delaware-town  ; 
 found  divers  drinking  and  drunken.  Difcourfed  with  fome 
 of  the  Indians  about  Chriftianity ;  obferved  my  interpreter 
 much  engaged  and  afllfted  in  his  work ;  fome  few  perfons 
 feemed  to  hear  with  great  earneflncfs  and  engagement  of  foul. 
 About  noon,  rode  to  a  fmall  town  of  Shauwaunoes,  about 
 eight  miles  diftant;  fpent  an  hour  or  two  there,  and  returned 
 to  the  Delaware-town,  and  lodged  there.  Was  fcarce  ever 
 more  confounded  with  a  fenfe  of  ray  own  unfruitfulnefs  and 
 wnfitnefs  for  my  work,  than  now.  Oh,  what  a  dead,  heart- 
 lefs,  barren,  unprofitable  wretch  did  I  now  fee  my  felf  to  be ! 
 3My  fpirits  were  fo  low,  and  my  bodily  flrength  fo  wafted, 
 that  I  could  do  nothing  at  all.  At  length,  being  much  over- 
 done, lay  down  on  a  buffalo-JJ<:in ;  but  fweat  much  the 
 whole  night. 
 
 Thurfday,  September  4.  Difcourfed  with  the  Indians,  in 
 the  morning,  about  ChrilBanity ;  my  interpreter,  afterwards, 
 carrying  on  the  difccurfe,  to  a  confiderablc  length  :  fome  few 
 appeared  well-di(pofed,  and  fomewhat  affefted.  Left  this 
 place,  and  returned  towards  Shaumoking ;  and  at  night  lod- 
 
 ced 
 
Mt.tg.     Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  207 
 
 ged  in  the  place  where  I  lodged  the  Monday-night  before  :  was 
 in  very  uncomfortable  circumftances  in  the  evening,  ray  people 
 being  belated,  and  not  coming  to  me  till  part  ten  at  night ; 
 fo  that  I  had  no  fire  to  drefs  any  victuals,  or  to  keep  me 
 warm,  or  keep  off  wild  beafts ;  and  I  was  fcarce  ever  more 
 weak  and  worn  out  in  all  my  life.  However,  I  lay  down 
 and  llept  before  my  people  came  up,  expcdling  nothing  elfe 
 but  to  fpend  the  whole  night  alone,  and  without  fire. 
 
 Friday,  September  5.  Was  exceeding  v/eak,  fo  that  I  could 
 fcarcely  ride ;  it  fecmcd  fometimes  as  if  I  muft  fall  off  from 
 my  horfe,  and  lie  in  the  open  woods :  however,  got  to  Shau- 
 moking,  towards  night  :  felt  Ibmething  of  a  fpirit  of  thank- 
 fulnefs,  that  God  had  (o  far  returned  me :  was  refrefhed, 
 to  fee  one  of  my  ChriAians,  whom  1  left  here  in  my  late  ex- 
 curfion. 
 
 Saturday,  September  6.  Spent  the  day  in  a  very  weak 
 ftate ;  coughing  and  fpitting  blood,  and  having  little  appetite 
 to  any  food  I  had  with  me  :  was  able  to  do  very  little,  except 
 difcourfe  a  while  of  divine  things  to  my  own  people,  and  to 
 fome  few  I  met  with.  Had,  by  this  time,  very  lirtle  life  or 
 heart  to  fpeak  for  God,  through  feeblenefs  of  body,  and 
 flatnefs  of  fpirits.  "Was  fcarcely  ever  more  afhamed  and  con- 
 founded in  myfelf,  than  now.  I  was  fenfible,  that  there  were 
 numbers  of  God's  people,  who  knew  I  was  then  out  upon  a 
 defign  (or  at  leaft  the  pretence)  of  doing  fomething  for  God, 
 and  in  his  caufe,  among  the  poor  Indians;  and  they  were 
 ready  to  fuppofe,  that  I  was  fervent  in  fpirit:  but  Oh,  the 
 heartlefs  frame  of  mind  that  I  felt,  filled  me  with  con- 
 fufionl  Oh  (methought)  if  God's  people  knew  me,  as  God 
 knows,  they  would  not  think  fo  highly  of  my  zeal  and  re- 
 folution  for  God,  as  perhaps  now  they  do !  I  could  not  but 
 defirc  they  fhould  fee  how  heartlefs  and  irrefolute  I  was,  that 
 they  might  be  undeceived,  and  "  not  think  of  me  above  what 
 **  they  ought  to  think."  And  yet  I  thought,  if  they  faw  the 
 utmolt  of  my  fiatnefs  and  unfaithfulnefs,  the  fmallnefs  of  my 
 courage  and  rcfolution  for  God,  they  would  be  ready  to  fhut 
 me  out  of  their  doors,  as  unworthy  of  the  company  or  friend- 
 jfhip  of  Chriftians. 
 
 Lord's  day,  September  7.  Was  much  in  the  fame  weak 
 ftate  of  body,  and  aiflifled  frame  of  mind,  as  in  the  preceding 
 day :  my  foul  was  grieved,  and  mourned  that  I  could  do  no- 
 ihing  for  God.  Read  and  expounded  fome  part  of  God's 
 word  to  my  own  dear  family,  and  fpent  fome  time  in  prayer 
 with  them ;  difcourfed  alfo  a  little  to  the  Pagans :  but  fpent 
 the  Sabbath  with  a  little  comfort- 
 
 Monday, 
 
^oJ  THELIFEOF  A,B,ryA^$, 
 
 Monday,  September  8.  Spent  the  forenoon  among  the  In- 
 dians ;  in  the  afternoon,  left  Shaumoking,  and  returned  down 
 the  river,  a  few  miles.  Had  propofed  to  have  tarried  a  con- 
 fiderable  time  longer  amonc;  the  Indians  upon  Sufquahannah  j 
 but  was  hindered  from  purfuing  my  purpofe  by  the  ficknefs 
 that  prevailed  there,  the  weakly  circumrtances  of  my  own 
 people  that  were  with  me,  and  efpecially  my  own  <xtraordi- 
 jnary  wcaknefs,  having  been  cxercifed  with  great  nofturnal 
 fweats,  and  a  coughing  up  of  blood,  in  almolt  the  whole  of 
 the  journey ;  and  was  a  great  part  of  the  time  fo  feeble  and 
 faint,  that  it  feemed  as  though  I  never  fliould  be  able  to  reach 
 home ;  and  at  the  fame  time  very  deftitute  of  the  comforts, 
 and  even  neceffaries  of  life;  at  leafl,  what  was  neceflary  for 
 one  in  fo  weak  a  ftate.  In  this  journey  I  fometimes  was  en- 
 abled to  fpeak  the  word  of  God  with  fome  power,  and  di- 
 vine truths  made  fome  imprelUons  on  divers  that  heard  me ; 
 fo  that  fcveral,  both  men  and  women,  old  and  young,  feemed 
 to  cleave  to  us,  and  be  well  difpofed  towards  ChriJ^'ian'ity ; 
 but  otbcj-.f  mocked  and  fhouted,  which  damped  thofe  who 
 before  feemed  friendly,  at  leaft  fome  of  them  :  yet  God,  at 
 times,  was  evidently  prefent,  affifling  me,  ray  interpreter, 
 and  other  dear  friends  who  were  with  me  :  God  gave,  fome- 
 times, a  good  degree  of  freedom  in  prayer  for  the  ingather- 
 ing of  fouls  there ;  and  I  could  not  but  entertain  a  ftrong 
 hope,  that  the  journey  fiaould  not  be  wholly  fruitlefs.  Whe- 
 ther the  ifTue  of  it  would  be  the  fetting  up  Chrill's  kingdom 
 there,  or  only  the  drawing  of  fome  few  perfons  down  to  my 
 congregation  in  New- Jeriey ;  or  whether  they  were  now  only 
 preparing  for  fome  further  attempts,  that  might  be  made 
 among  them,  I  did  not  determine  :  but  I  was  pcrfuaded,  the 
 journey  would  not  be  loft.  BlefTed  be  God,  that  I  had  any 
 encouragement  and  hope. 
 
 Tuefday,  September  9.  Rode  down  the  river,  near  thirty 
 miles.  Was  extreme  weak,  much  fatigued,  and  wet  with 
 a  thunder-ftorm.  Difcourfed  with  fome  warmth  and  clofe- 
 ncfs  to  fome  poor  ignorant  fouls,  on  the  life  and /ciufr  of  reli- 
 glon  ;  what  were,  and  what  were  not  the  etidences  of  it.  7  bey 
 feemed  much  aftoniTned,  when  they  faw  my  Indians  afk  a 
 bleifing,  and  give  thanks,  at  dinner;  concluding //-^f  a  ^ery 
 high  evidence  of  grace  in  them:  but  were  afionilhed,  whta 
 I  infifted,  that  neither  that,  nor  yet  fccret  prayer,  was  any 
 lure  evidence  of  grace.  Oh  the  ignorance  of  the  world? 
 How  arc  fome  empty  outward /orw.r,  that  may  all  be  entirely 
 filfjhy  miftaken  for  true  religion,  inlaliible  evidences  ot  it! 
 The  Lord  pity  a  deluded  world! 
 
 Wcdnefday, 
 
^/.t9-        ^R     ©AVID     BRATNERD.         209 
 
 Wednefday,  SeptemWer  10.  Rode  near  twenty  miles  home- 
 ward. Was  much  fohcited  to  preach,  but  was  utterly  un- 
 able, through  b  )dily  weaknefs.  Was  extremely  overdone 
 with  the  heat  and  fhowers  this  day,  and  couijhed  up  confider- 
 able  blood. 
 
 Thurfday,  September  11.  Rode  homeward ;  but  was  very 
 weak,  and  fometimes  fcarce  able  to  ride.  Had  a  very  im- 
 portunate invitation  to  preach  at  a  meeting  houfe  I  came  by, 
 the  people  being  then  gathering  ;  but  could  not,  by  reafon  of 
 weaknefs.  Was  religned  and  omp  ^Icd  under  my  weaknefs  ; 
 but  was  much  exercifed  with  concern  for  my  companions  in 
 travel,  whom  I  had  left  with  much  regret,  fome  lame,  and 
 fomc  fick. 
 
 Friday,  September  12.  Rode  about  fifty  miles;  and  came 
 jull  at  night  to  a  Chriftim  friend's  houfe,  about  twenty-five 
 miles  weflvvard  from  Philadelphia.  Was  courteoufly  recei- 
 ved, and  kindly  entertained,  and  found  myfelf  much  refrefhed 
 \n  the  midft  of  my  weaknefs  and  fatigues. 
 ]  Saturday.  September  13.  Was  flill  agreeably  entertained 
 with  Chriftian  frirndfhip,  and  all  things  ncceftary  for  my 
 weak  circumftances.  In  the  afternoon,  heard  Mr  Treat 
 preach ;  and  was  refrefhed  in  converfation  with  him,  in  the 
 evening. 
 
 Lord's  day,  September  14.  At  the  defire  of  Mr  Treat  and 
 the  people,  I  preached  both  pai  ts  of  the  day  (but  fliort)  from 
 Luke  xiv.  23.  God  gave  me  fome  freedom  and  warmth  in 
 my  difcourfe ;  and  I  truft,  helped  me  in  fome  meafure  to  Iz- 
 hour  in  Jinglenefs  of  heart.  M' as  much  tired  in  the  evening, 
 but  was  comforted  with  the  moft  tender  treatment  I  ever 
 met  with  in  my  life.  My  mind,  through  the  whole  of  this 
 day,  was  exceeding  calm ;  and  I  could  afk  for  nothing  in 
 prayer,  with  any  encouragement  of  foul,  but  that  "  the  will 
 "  of  God  might  be  done." 
 
 Monday,  September  15.  Spent  the  whole  day,  in  concert 
 with  Mr  Treat,  in  endeavours  to  compofe  a  difference,  fub- 
 fifting  between  certain  pcrfons  in  the  congregation  where  we 
 now  were  :  there  f^emed  to  be  a  blelTing  on  our  endeavours. 
 In  the  evening,  baptized  a  child :  was  in  a  calm  compofed 
 frame,  and  enjoyed  (I  truft)  a  fpiritual  fenfe  of  divine  things, 
 while  adminiftering  the  ordinance.  Afterwards,  fpent  the  time 
 in  religious  converfation,  till  late  in  the  night.  This  was  in- 
 deed a  pleafant  agreeable  evening. 
 
 Tuefday,  September  16.  Continued  ftill  at  my  friend's 
 houfe,  about  twenty  f«e  miles  weftward  of  Philadelphia.    Was 
 
 »  d  Tcnjr 
 
210  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     0  F  A.D.  1746, 
 
 very  weak,  unable  to  perform  any  bufinefs,  and  fcarccly  able 
 to  Ik  up. 
 
 Wednefday,  September  17.  Rode  in  to  Philadelphia.  Still 
 very  weak,  and  my  cough  and  fpitting  of  blood  continued. 
 Enjoyed  fume  agreeable  converfation  with  friends,  but  wanted 
 more  fpirituality. 
 
 Thurfday,  September  18.  Went  from  Philadelphia  to  Mr 
 Treat's  :  Was  agreeably  entertained  on  the  road  ;  and  Was  in  ft 
 fwect  compofed  frame,  in  the  evening. 
 
 Friday,  September  19.  Rode  from  Mr  Treat's  to  Mr  Stock- 
 din's  at  Prince- Town  :  was  extreme  weak,  but  kindly  recei- 
 ved and  entertained.  Spent  the  evening  with  fome  degree  of 
 latisfadlion. 
 
 Saturday,  September  20.  Arrived  among  my  own  people, 
 jufl:  at  night:  found  them  praying  together  :  went  in,  and  gave 
 theni  fome  account  of  God's  dealings  with  me  and  my  com- 
 panions in  the  journey ;  which  feemed  affefling  to  them.  I 
 then  prayed  with  them,  and  thought  the  divine  prcfence  waS 
 amongft  us ;  divers  were  melted  into  tears,  and  feemed  to 
 have  a  fenfc  of  divine  things.  Being  very  weak,  I  was  obli- 
 ged foon  to  repair  to  my  lodgings,  and  felt  much  worn  out,  in 
 the  evening.  Thus  God  has  carried  me  through  the  fatigues 
 and  perils  of  another  journey  to  Suiquahannah,  and  returned 
 '  me  again  in  fafety,  though  under  a  great  degree  of  bodily  in- 
 difpofition.  Oh  that  my  foul  were  truly  thankful  for  re- 
 newed inftances  of  mercy !  Many  hardfhips  and  diflrefTcs  I 
 endured  in  this  journey :  but  the  Lord  fupported  me  under 
 them  all. 
 
 PART 
 
^^)K^^){(^^^.^¥)^J()K:^:>K^K^^¥)^''):a^^X¥^)k 
 
 PART      viir. 
 
 After  his  return  from  his  laft  je'arney  to  Suf- 
 quahannah,  until  his  deat!'>. 
 
 IN.  B.  TTItherto  Mr  Brainerd  had  kept  a  conftant  diary, 
 -I  JL  giving  an  account  of  what  pafTed  from  day  to 
 day,  with  very  little  interruption :  but  henceforward  his  dia- 
 ry is  very  much  interrupted  by  his  illnefs ;  under  which  he 
 ■was  often  brought  fo  low,  as  either  not  to  be  capable  of  wri- 
 ting, or  not  well  able  to  bear  the  burden  of  a  care  fo  conftant, 
 as  was  rcquifite,  to  recolleft,  every  evening,  what  had  paifed 
 In  the  day,  and  digeft  it,  and  fet  down  an  orderly  account  of 
 it  in  writing.  However,  his  diary  was  not  wholly  neglected; 
 but  he  took  care,  from  time  to  time,  to  take  fome  nctic<r  in 
 k  of  the  moft  material  things  concerning  himfelf  and  the  ftate 
 of  his  mind,  even  till  within  a  few  days  of  his  death ;  as  the 
 reader  will  fee  afterwards  *.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  September  21.  1746.  I  was  fo  weak  I  could 
 not  preach,  nor  pretend  to  ride  over  to  my  people  in  the 
 forenoon.     In  the  afternoon,  rode  out ;  fat  in  my  chair,  and 
 
 *  Mr  Shepard,  in  his  Stle&  cafes  refelved,  under  the  firft  cafe 
 fays  as  follows.  "  I  have  lately  known  one  very  able,  wife,  and 
 "  godly,  put  upon  the  rack,  by  him  that,  envying  God's  people's 
 *'  peace,  knows  how  to  change  himfelf  into  an  angel  of  light  .-  for 
 *'  it  being  his  ufual  courfe,  in  the  time  of  his  health,  to  make  a 
 •'  diary  of  his  hourly  life,  and  finding  much  benefit  by  it,  he  was 
 "  in  confcience  prefled,  by  the  power  and  delufion  of  Satan,  to 
 "  make  and  take  the  fame  daily  furvey  of  his  life  in  the  time  of  his 
 *^  Jickncfs  \  by  means  of  which  he  fpcnt  his  enfeebled  fpirits,  caft 
 •'  on  fuel  to  fire  his  ficknefs.  Had  not  a  friend  of  his  convinced 
 •'  him  of  his  erroneous  confcience  mifleading  him  at  tnat  time,  he 
 *'  had  murdered  his  body,  out  of  confcience  to  fave  his  foul,  and 
 "  to  preferve  his  grace.  And  do  you  think  thefe  were  the  motions 
 "  of  God's  Spirit,  which  like  thofe /<5f«7?/.  Rev,  ix.  9.  10.  had  fa- 
 *'  ces  like  vicn,  but  had  tails  like  fcorbions,  and  liings  in  their 
 "  tails?" 
 
 D  d  2  difcourfed 
 
ai2  T  H  E    L  T  F  E    O  F  J.  D.  1746. 
 
 difcourfed  to  my  people  from  Rom.  xiv.  7.  8.  I  was  ftrength- 
 cned  and  helped  in  my  diicourfe  :  and  there  appci^rcd  lomc- 
 thing  agreeable  in  the  alTembly.  I  returned  to  my  lodgings 
 extremely  tired  ;  but  thankful,  thst  I  had  been  enabled  to 
 fpeak  a  word  to  my  poor  people  1  had  been  fo  long  abfent 
 from.  Wa^  able  to  fleep  very  little  this  night,  through  wea- 
 rinefs  and  pain.  Oh,  how  blefTcd  (hould  I  be,  if  the  little  I 
 do  were  all  done  with  right  view:> !  Oh  that,  "whether  I  live, 
 "  I  might  live  to  the  Lord,"  tc. 
 
 Saturday,  September  27.  Spent  this  day,  as  well  as  the 
 whole  week  paft,  under  a  great  degree  of  bodily  weaknefs, 
 cxcrciitd  with  a  violent  cotgh,  and  a  ccnfiderable  fever;  had 
 no  appetite  to  any  kind  of  food;  and  frequently  brought  up 
 what  i  eat,  as  foon  as  it  was  down  ;  and  oftentimes  had  little 
 reft  in  my  bed,  by  reafon  of  pains  in  my  breaft  and  back  :  was 
 able,  however,  to  lide  over  to  my  people,  about  two  miles, 
 every  day,  and  take  fome  care  of  thofe  who  were  then  at  work 
 upon  a  Iniall  houfe  for  me  to  rclide  in  amongft  the  Indians  *. 
 I  was  fometinifs  fcaice  able  to  walk,  and  never  able  to  fit  up 
 the  whole  day,  thragh  the  week.  Was  calm  and  conrpofed, 
 and  but  lirtie  exeicifed  with  melancholy  dan'ps,  as  in  former 
 feafons  of  weakncfs.  Whether  I  fhculd  ever  recover  or  no, 
 feemed  very  doubtful;  but  this  was  many  times  a  comfort  to 
 me,  that  life  and  death  did  not  depend  upon  ry  choice,  I  was 
 pleafed  to  thirk,  that  he  who  is  ii  finitely  wile,  had  the  de- 
 termination of  this  matter ;  and  that  I  had  no  trotble,  to 
 confider  and  weigh  things  vpon  all  fides,  in  order  to  make  the 
 choice,  \\hethe]  I  would  live  or  die.  Thus  my  time  was  con- 
 fumed  ;  1  had  little  flrength  to  pray,  none  to  write  or  read, 
 and  fcarce  any  to  meditate  ;  but  through  divine  goodnefs,  I 
 could  with  great  compokre  lock  death  in  the  face,  and  fre* 
 quentiy  with  lenfble  yy.  Oh,  hov\  blcTed  it  is,  to  be  hcb'^ 
 ti  (lly  preperfd  for  death  I  The  Lord  grant,  that  I  iDay  be 
 a£ltiully  ready  alfo  ! 
 
 Lord's  day,  Scpteirber  28.  Rede  to  my  people;  andj 
 though  under  much  weakr.cls,  atten  pted  to  preach  from 
 1  Cor.  xiii.  3.  Diiccurfed  about  half  an  hour;  at  which  fe»- 
 fon  divine  power  feemed  to  attend  the  word:  but  being  ex- 
 treme weak,  I  was  rbliged  to  def  ft;  and  after  a  turn  of  faino- 
 nefs,  with  much  difficulty  rode  to  mjy  lodgings;  where  bcta- 
 
 *  This  WRS  xhi  fourth  houfe  he  built  for  his  refidence  among  the 
 Indian?  Bcfidts  that  at  Kaurarmeek,  and  that  at  the  Forks  of 
 Dclawart,  and  another  at  Crofwetkfung,  he  built  OBC  now  at  Crao- 
 berry. 
 
 king 
 
j^f.  -29.      M  n    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.        itj 
 
 Jcing  myfclf  to  my  bed,  I  lay  in  a  burning  fever,  and  almcfl 
 deliiious,  for  fe\  eral  houri  ;  till  towards  morning,  my  feve? 
 Wf-nt  off  with  a  violent  fweat.  1  have  often  betn  feverifh,  and 
 unable  to  reft  quiet'y  atter  preaching  :  but  this  was  the  mod 
 fevere  diftrefling  turn,  that  ever  p.eaching  brought  upon  me. 
 Yet  I  felt  perfectly  at^eft  in  rny  own  rauiJ,  b  caule  I  hai 
 ma Jc  my  utmoft  attempts  Cj  fpeak  for  God,  and  knew  I  could 
 «1  J  no  more. 
 
 Tuefdjy,  September  30.  Yefterday,  and  to-day,  was  in  the 
 fame  weak  ftate,  or  rather  weaker  than  in  days  part  ;  was 
 fcarce  able  to  fit  up  half  the  day.  Was  in  a  compofed  frame 
 ©f  mind,  remarkably  free  from  dejcftion  and  melancholy 
 da:Tips;  as  God  has  been  pleafed,  in  great  meafure,  to  deli^ 
 ver  me  from  thefe  unhappy  glooms,  in  the  general  courfe  of 
 my  prefent  weakncfs  hitherto,  and  alfo  from  a  peevilh  fro- 
 ^vard  Ijiirit  :  And  Oh  how  great  a  mercy  is  this  !  Oh  that  I 
 might  always  be  perfe<5lly  quiet  in  feaf.  ns  of  greateft  weak-? 
 nefs,  although  nature  fhould  fink  and  fail!  Oh  that  I  may  al- 
 ways be  able  with  utmoft  fincerity  to  fay,  "  Lord,  not  my 
 **  will,  but  thine  be  done!"  This,  through  grace,  I  can  fay 
 at  piefent,  with  regard  to  life  or  death,  "  The  Lord  do  with 
 *'  me  as  feems  good  in  his  fight ;"  that  whether  I  li\e  or  die, 
 Ivnzyglor'fy  h'm,  who  is  "worthy  to  receive  bkfling,  and 
 **  honour,  and  dominion  for  ever.     Amen." 
 
 Saturday,  Oftobei  4.  Spent  the  former  part  of  this  week 
 under  a  great  degree  of  infirmity  and  difordcr,  as  I  had  done 
 feveral  weeks  before:  was  able,  however,  to  ride  a  little  every 
 day,  although  unable  to  fit  up  half  the  day,  till  Thurfday. 
 Tov^k  fome  care  daily  of  fome  perfons  at  work  upon  ray 
 houfc.  On  triday,  after  noon  found  myfelf  wonderfully 
 revived  and  ftrengthened ;  and  having  fome  time  before  givea 
 n  jtice  to  my  people,  and  thofc  of  them  at  the  Forks  of  De- 
 laware in  particular,  that  I  defigned,  with  leave  of  Provi- 
 dence, to  adminifter  the  facrament  of  the  Lord's  fupper  upon 
 the  fi[rft  Sabbath  in  0«5lober,  the  Sabbath  now  approaching^ 
 on  Friday-afternoon  I  preached,  preparatory  to  the  facra- 
 ment, from  2  Cor.  xiii.  5.  finifning  what  I  had  propofed  to 
 offer  upjn  the  fubjeft  the  Sabbath  before.  The  fermcn  was 
 blefled  of  God  to  the  ftirring  up  religious  afFefticn,  and  a 
 fplric  of  devotion,  in  the  people  of  God;  and  to  the  greatly 
 atf^fting  one  who  had  backflldden  from  God,  which  caufed 
 him  to  judge  and  condemn  himfelf.  I  was  furprifingly 
 ftrengthened  in  my  work,  while  I  was  fpeaking :  but  was  o- 
 bliged  immediately  after  to  repair  to  bed,  being  nosv  removed 
 into  my  own  houfe  anaong  the  IiWians  j  whi«h  gave  me  fuch 
 
 Ipeedy 
 
ai4  T  H  E    L  1  r  E    O  F  AD.  1746. 
 
 fpeedy  relief  and  rcfrefliment,  as  I  could  not  well  have  lived 
 "without.  Spent  fome  time  on  Friday  night  in  convcrfing 
 with  my  people  about  divine  things,  as  I  lay  upon  my  bed ; 
 and  found  my  foul  refrefhed,  though  my  body  was  weak. 
 This  being  Saturday,  I  difcourfcd  particularly  with  divers  of 
 the  communicants ;  and  this  afternoon  preached  from  Zech.  xii. 
 10-  There  feeraed  to  be  a  tender  melting,  and  hearty  mourn- 
 ing for  fm,  in  numbers  in  the  congregation.  My  foul  was  in  a 
 comfortable  frame,  and  I  enjoyed  freedom  and  ailiftance  in 
 public  fervice ;  was  rayfelf,  as  well  as  moft  of  the  congrega- 
 tion, much  affefted  with  the  humble  confeffion,  and  appa- 
 rent brokcn-hcartednefs  of  the  forementioned  backjllder ;  and 
 could  not  but  rejoice,  that  God  had  given  him  fuch 
 a  fenfe  of  his  fm  and  unworthinefs.  Was  extremely  tired 
 in  the  evening;  but  lay  on  my  bed,  and  difcourfed  to  ray 
 people. 
 
 Lord's  day,  Ocflober  5-  Was  ftill  very  weak;  and  in  the 
 morning,  confiderably  afraid  I  fhould  not  be  able  to  go 
 through  the  work  of  the  day ;  having  much  to  do,  both  in 
 private  and  public.  Difcourfed  before  the  adminiftration  of 
 the  facrament,  from  John  i.  29.  "  Behold  the  Lamb  of  God, 
 "^  that  taketh  away  the  fm  of  the  world."  Where  I  con- 
 lidered,  I.  In  what  refpefls  Chrilt  is  called  the  Lamb  of  Cod ; 
 and  obferved  that  he  is  fo  called,  (i.)  From  the  purity  and 
 inmcency  of  his  nature.  (2.)  From  his  meeknefs  and  patience 
 tinder  fufferings.  (3.)  From  his  being  that  atonement,  which 
 ■was  pointed  out  in  the  facrifce  of  lambs,  and  in  particular 
 hy  the pafchal \zmh.  IL  Confidered  how  and  in  what  fenfe 
 he  "  takes  away  the  fm  of  the  world :"  and  obferved,  that 
 the  means  and  manner,  in  and  by  which  he  takes  away  the 
 fins  of  men,  was  his  "  giving  himfelf  for  them,"  doing  and 
 fufFering  in  their  room  and  flead,  6c.  And  he  is  faid  to  take 
 away  the  fm  of  the  ivorld,  not  becaufe  all  the  world  fhall 
 aclually  be  redeemed  from  fin  by  him  ;  but  becaufe,  (i.)  He 
 has  done  and  fuifcred yl/^c/V??/  to  anfwer  for  the  fins  of  the 
 world,  and  fo  to  redeem  ail  mankind.  (2.)  He  aSinally  does 
 take  away  the  fins  of  the  t/f^  world.  And,  III.  Confidered 
 how  we  are  to  behold  him,  in  order  to  have  our  fins  taken 
 away,  (i.)  Not  with  our  bodily  eyes.  Nor,  (2.)  By  imagi- 
 ning him  on  the  crofs,  <tc.  But  by  ^fpiritual  view  of  his  glcry 
 
 and  gocdnefs,  engaging  the  foul  to  rely  on  him,  6c. The 
 
 div'ine  prefencc  attended  this  difcourfe  ;  and  the  aifembly  was 
 confiderably  melted  with  divine  truths.  After  fermon  bap- 
 tized two  perfons.  Then  adminifiercd  the  Lord's  fupper  to 
 near  forf:y  communicants,  of  the  Indians,  bcfides  divers  dear 
 
 Chrifciana 
 
Jl't.ig.     Mr    DAVID     BRAINEHD.  it^ 
 
 Chfiftians  of  the  white  people.  It  feemed  to  be  a  feafon  of 
 divine  power  and  grace ;  and  numbers  feemed  to  rejoice  in 
 God.  Oh,  the  fweet  union  and  harmony  then  appearing  a- 
 mong  the  religious  people !  My  foul  was  refrefhed,  and  my 
 religious  friends,  of  the  white  people,  with  me.  After  the 
 facrament,  could  fcarcely  get  home,  though  it  was  not  more 
 than  twenty  roods ;  but  was  fupported  and  led  by  my  friends, 
 and  laid  on  my  bed ;  where  I  lay  in  pain  till  fome  time  in 
 the  evening;  and  then  was  able  to  fit  up  and  difcourfe  with 
 friends.  Oh,  how  was  this  day  fpent  in  prayers  and  praifes 
 among  my  dear  people  !  One  might  hear  them,  all  the  morn- 
 ing, before  public  worfhip,  and  in  the  evening,  till  near  mid- 
 night, praying  and  fmging  praifes  to  God,  in  one  or  other  of 
 their  houfes.  My  foul  was  refrertied,  though  ray  body  waft 
 weak. 
 
 [This  week,  he  went  (in  a  very  low  ftate)  in  two  days, 
 to  Eli fabeth- Town,  to  attend  the  meeting  of  the  Synod 
 there :  but  was  difappolnted  by  its  removal  to  New-York- 
 He  continued  in  a  very  compofed  comfortable  frame  of 
 mind.j 
 
 Saturday,  Oftober  ii.  Tow^ds  night  was  feized  v/ith  ais 
 ague,  which  was  followed  with  a  hard  fever,  and  confiderable 
 pain:  was  treated  with  great  kindnefs,  and  was  afhamed  to 
 fee  fo  much  concern  about  fo  unworthy  a  creature,  as  I  knew 
 myfelftobc.  Was  in  a  comfortable  frame  of  mind,  wholly 
 fubmiffive,  with  regard  to  life  or  death.  It  was  indeed  a  pe- 
 culiar fatisfacVion  to  me,  to  think,  that  it  was  not  my  con- 
 cern or  bufinefs  to  determine  whether  I  fliould  live  or  die.  I 
 like  wife  felt  peculiarly  fatisfied,  while  under  this  uncommon 
 degree  of  diforder;  being  now  fully  convinced  of  my  being 
 really  weak,  and  unable  to  perform  my  work ;  whereas 
 at  other  times  my  mind  was  perplexed  with  fears,  that  I 
 was  a  mifimprover  of  time,  by  conceiting  I  was  fick,  when  I 
 was  not  in  reality  fo.  Oh,  how  precious  is  time !  And  how 
 guilty  it  makes  me  feel,  when  I  think  I  have  trifled  away  and 
 mifimproved  it,  or  neglefted  to  fill  up  each  part  of  it  with 
 duty,  to  the  utmoft  of  my  ability  and  capacity! 
 
 Lord's  day,  Odlober  12.  Was  fcarce  able  to  fit  up,  in  the 
 forenoon :  in  the  afternoon,  attended  public  worfhip,  and 
 was  in  a  compofed  comfortable  frame. 
 
 Lord's  day,  October  19.  Was  fcarcely  able  to  do  any  thing 
 at  all  in  the  week  part,  except  that  on  Thurfday  I  rode  out 
 about  four  miles ;  at  which  time  I  took  cold.     As  I  was  able 
 
 to 
 
il6  THELIFEOP  J.  D.  1746. 
 
 to  do  little  or  nothing,  fo  I  enjoyed  not  much  fpirituality,  or 
 lively  religious  affedtion;  though  at  fome  times  I  longe^ 
 much  to  be  more  fruitful  and  full  of  heavenly  afFedlion ;  and 
 was  grieved  to  fee  the  hours  Aide  away,  while  I  could  do 
 nothing  for  God. — Was  able  this  week  to  attend  public  wor- 
 /hip.  Was  compofed  and  comfortable,  willing  either  to  die 
 or  live  ;  but  found  it  hard  to  be  reconciled  to  the  thoughts  of 
 giving  ujelefs.  Oh  that  I  might  never  live  to  be  a  burden  t(> 
 God't,  creation  ;  but  that  1  might  be  allowed  to  repair  homCf 
 when  nxy  fojournlng  work  is  done  I 
 
 [This  wf  ek,  he  went  back  to  his  Indians  at  Cranberry,  to 
 take  fome  care  of  their  fpiritual  and  temporal  concerns :  and 
 was  much  fpent  with  riding  ;  though  he  rode  but  a  little  way 
 in  a  day.] 
 
 Thurfday,  0<n:ober  23.  "Went  to  my  own  houfe,  and  fet 
 thing?  in  order.  Was  very  weak,  and  fomewhat  melancholy : 
 laboured  to  do  fomething,  but  had  no  ftrength ;  and  was  for- 
 ced to  He  down  on  my  bed,  very  folitary. 
 
 Friday,  Oiflober  24.  Spent  the  day  in  overfceing  and  di- 
 refting  my  people,  about  mending  their  fence,  and  fecuring 
 their  wheat.  Found,  that  all  their  concerns  of  a  ftcular  na- 
 ture depended  upon    me. Was  fomewhat  refrefhed  in  the 
 
 evening,  having  been  able  to  dj  fomething  valuable  in  the  day- 
 time. Oh,  how  it  pains  me,  to  izc  time  pais  away,  when  I 
 can  do  nothing  to  any  purpofe  ! 
 
 Saturday,  Oftober  ^5.  Vifited  fome  of  my  people ;  fpent 
 fome  time  in  writing,  and  felt  much  better  in  body,  than 
 ufual:  when  it  was  near  night,  I  felt  fo  well,  that  I  had 
 thoughts  of  expounding:  but  in  the  evening  was  much  dif  order- 
 ed again,  and  fpent  the  night  in  coughing,  and  fpitting  of 
 blood. 
 
 Lord's  day,  October  26.  In  the  morning,  was  exceeding 
 weak  :  fpent  the  day,  till  near  night,  in  pain  to  fee  my  poor 
 people  wandering  as  Jheep  not  having  a  JJjepherd,  waiting 
 and  hoping  to  fee  me  able  to  preach  to  them  before  night:  it 
 could  not  but  diftrefs  me,  to  fee  them  in  this  cafe,  and  to 
 fir.d  myfclf  unable  to  attempt  any  thing  for  their  fpiriiual  be- 
 nefit. But  towards  night,  finding  myfelf  a  little  better,  I 
 called  them  together  to  my  houfc,  and  fat  down,  and  read  and 
 expounded  Matth.  v.  i. —  1 6. This  difcourfe, though  dflivercd  in 
 much  weakncfs,  was  attended  with  power  to  many  of  the  hearers ; 
 efpecially  what  was  fpoken  upon  the  laft  of  thcfe  verfes ; 
 where  I  infifled  on  the  infinite  wrong  done  to  religion,  by 
 
 havir^g 
 
JF.t.2<).      Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  217 
 
 having  our  light  become  darkrefs,  inftead  of  JJ^in'ng  bifore 
 wen.  As  many  in  the  c jn.5'egatijn  were  now  deeply  aft'eft- 
 ed  with  a  fenfe  of  their  deficiency,  in  regard  of  a  fpiritual 
 converfation,  that  might  recommend  religion  to  others,  and 
 a  fpirit  of  concern  and  watchfuhief-.  leemed  to  be  excited  in 
 them;  fo  there  was  one,  in  pa.  ticular,  that  had  fallen  into 
 the  fm  of  drunkennefs,  fjme  time  before,  who  was  now 
 deeply  convinced  of  his  lin,  and  the  great  difhonour  done  to 
 relivrlm  by  his  mifc-inducl,  and  difcuvered  a  great  degiee  of 
 grief  and  concern  on  that  account.  My  foul  was  refrtflied, 
 to  fee  this-  And  though  I  had  n .»  ftrength  to  fpeak  (o  much 
 as  I  would  have  done,  but  was  (  bliged  to  lie  down  on  the 
 bed ;  yet  I  rejoiced  to  fee  fuch  an  humble  melting  in  the  con- 
 gregation ;  and  that  divine  truths,  though  faintly  delivered, 
 were  attended  with   fo   much  efficacy  upon  the  auditory. 
 
 Aionday,  OJl  )ber  27.  Spent  the  day  in  overleeing  and  di- 
 recting the  Indians,  about  mending  the  fence  round  their 
 wheat:  was  able  to  walk  with  them,  and  contiive  their  bufi- 
 nefi,  all  the  forenoon.  In  the  afternoon,  was  vif.ted  by  two 
 dear  friends,  and  fpent  fome  time  in  converfation  with  thtm. 
 Towards  night,  was  able  to  walk  out,  and  take  care  of  the 
 Indians  again.  In  the  evening,  enjoyed  a  very  peaceful 
 fraaie. 
 
 Tuefday,  O^lober  28.  Rode  to  Prince-Town,  in  a  very 
 weak  ftate  :  had  fuch  a  violent  fever,  by  the  way,  that  I  was 
 forced  to  alight  at  a  friend'.->  houfe,  and  lie  down  for  fume 
 time.  Near  night,  wa?  vifited  by  Mr  Treat,  Mr  Beaty,  and 
 his  wife,  and  another  friend:  my  fpirits  were  refrcflicd  to 
 fee  them  ;  but  I  was  furpriz^d,  and  even  afliamed,  that  they 
 had  taken  fo  much  pains  as  to  ride  thirty  or  forty  miles  to  fee 
 me.  Was  able  to  fit  up  mod  of  the  evening  ;  and  fpent  the 
 time  in  a  very  comfortable  manner  with  my  friends. 
 
 VVednefday,  Oftjber  2y.  Rode  about  ten  miles  with  my 
 friends  that  came  yefterday  to  fee  me ;  and  then  parted  with 
 them  all  but  one,  who  flayed  on  purpofe  to  keep  me  compa- 
 ny, and  cheer  my  fpirits.  Was  extreme  weak,  and  veiy 
 feverifh,  efpccially  towaids  night  j  but  enjoyed  comfort  and 
 fatisfaftion. 
 
 Thurfday,  October  30.  Rode  three  or  four  miles,  to  viflt 
 Mr  Wales :  fpent  fome  time,  in  an  agreeable  manner,  in  con- 
 verfation ;  and  though  extreme  weak,  enjoyed  a  comfortable 
 compofed  frame  of  mind. 
 
 Friday,  Oaober  31.  Spent  the  day  among  friends,  in  a 
 comfortable  frame  of  mind,  though  exceeding  weak,  and  un- 
 der a  confiderable  fever. 
 
 E  e  Saturday, 
 
■m  'T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F  A.B,it^€> 
 
 Saturday,  November  i.  Took  leave  of  friends,  after  ha- 
 ving fpcnt  the  forenoon  with  them,  and  returned  home  to  my 
 own  houfe.  Was  much  difurdercd  in  the  evening,  and  op- 
 preffed  with  my  cough  ;  which  has  now  been  conltant  for  s. 
 long  time,  with  a  hard  pain  in  my  brealV,  and  fever. 
 
 Lord's  day,  November  2.  Was  unable  to  preach,  and  fcarce- 
 ly  able  to  lit  up,  the  whole  day.  Was  grieved,  and  almoft 
 iunk,  to  fee  my  poor  people  dcllitiite  of  the  means  of  grace  j 
 eipccially  conlideiing  they  could  not  read,  and  {o  were  under 
 great  diladvantagcs  for  Ipending  the  Sabbath  comfortably. 
 Oh,  methought,  I  could  be  contented  to  be  fick,  if  my  poor 
 fiock  had  a  faithful  jMllor  to  feed  them  with  fpiritual  know- 
 ledge !  A  view  of  their  want  of  this  was  more  affli(SLive  to 
 me,  than  all  my  bodily  illnefs. 
 
 JMonday,  November  3-  Being  now  in  fo  weak  and  low  a 
 flate,  that  I  was  utterly  uncapiible  of  performing  my  work, 
 and  having  little  hope  of  recovery,  unlefs  by  much  riding, 
 I  thought  it  my  duty  to  take  a  lengthy  journey  into  Ncw-Eng^ 
 land,  and  to  divert  myfeif  among  my  friends,  whom  I  had' 
 not  now  feen   for  a  long  time.     And  accordingly  took  leaver 
 
 of  my  congregation  this  day. Before  I  left  my  people,  I 
 
 yiiiteci  thcai  all  in  their  refpeftive  houfes,  and  dilcourled  to 
 each  one,  as  I  thought  mod  proper  and  fiiitable  for  their  cir- 
 cumfcances,  and  found  great  freedom  and  aiTillance  in  fo  do- 
 ing:  I  fcarcely  left  one  houfe  but  fome  were  in  tears;  and' 
 many  were  not  only  alFi*5ted  with  my  being  about  to  leave 
 them,  but  with  the  folcmn  addt  ejfes  I  made  them  upon  di- 
 vine things;  for  I  was  helped  to  be  fervent  infp'irit,  while  I 
 difcourfed  to  them.  When  I  had  thus  gone  through  my  con- 
 gregation, (which  took  me  mofl  of  the  day),  and  had  taken 
 leave  of  them,  and  of  the  fchool,  I  left  home,  and  rode  a- 
 bout  two  Fniles,  to  the  houfe  where  I  lived  in  the  fummer 
 part,  and  there  lodged.  Was  refrcflied,  this  evening,  in  that 
 I  had  left  my  congregation  fo  well  difpofed  and  affefted,  and' 
 that  I  had  been  fo  much  alliftcd  in  making  my  farewell-ad- 
 dre/Tes  to  them. 
 
 Tuefday,  November  4.  Rode  to  Woodbridge,  and  lodged 
 with  Mr  Pierfon  ;  continuing  iHll  in  a  very  weak  ftate. 
 
 Wednefday,  November  5.  Rode  to  Elifabeth-Town ;  in- 
 tending, as  foon  as  poffible,  to  profecute  my  journey  into 
 New- England.  Bat  wus,  in  an  hour  or  two  after  my  arrival, 
 taken  much  worfe. 
 
 After  this,  for  near  a  week,  was  confined  to  my  chamber,, 
 and  moft  of  the  tiuis  to  mv  bed :  and  then  lb  far  revived  as  to 
 
 be 
 
m.ig.      Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  219 
 
 be  able  to  walk  about  the  houfe  ;  but  was  ftiK  confined  withia 
 doors. 
 
 In  the  beginning  of  this  extraordinary  turn  of  cUforder,  af^ 
 ter  my  coming  to  Elifabeth-Town,  I  was  enabled  through 
 mercy  to  maintain  a  calm,  compofed,  and  patient  Ipiiit,  as  I 
 had  been  before  from  the  beginning  of  m}'^  weaknels.  Alter 
 I  had  been  In  Elifabcth-Town  about  a  fortnight,  and  had  ^o 
 far  recovered  that  I  was  able  to  walk  about  houfe,  upon  a 
 day  of  thankfgiving  kept  in  this  place,  I  was  enabled  to  recall 
 and  recount  over  the  mercies  of  God,  in  fuch  a  manner  as 
 greatly  afFe(fted  me,  and  filled  me  (I  think)  with  thankfulnefs 
 and  praife  to  God :  efpecially  my  foul  prailed  him  for  bis 
 work  of  grace  among  the  Indians,  and  the  enlargement  of  his 
 dear  kingdom:  my  foul  bleffed  God  for  what  he  is  in  him- 
 felf,  and  adored  him,  that  he  ever  would  difplay  himfelf  to 
 creatures :  I  rejoiced,  that  he  was  God,  and  longed  that  all 
 fhould  know  it,  and  feel  it,  and  rejoice  in  it.  "  Lord,  glo- 
 "  rify  thyfelf,"  was  the  deflre  and  cry  of  my  foul.  Oh  that 
 all  people  might  love  and  praife  the  ble-ffed  God;  that  he 
 might  have  all  poiTible  honour  and  glory  from  the  intelligent 
 world  *  ! 
 
 After  this  comfortable  thankfgiving- feafon,  I  frequently 
 enjoyed  freedom  and  enlargement  and  engagednefs  ot  foul  in 
 prayer,  and  was  enabled  to  intercede  with  God  for  my  dear 
 congregation,  very  often  for  every  family,  and  every  perfon, 
 in  particular;  and  it  was  often  a  great  comfort  to  me,  that  I 
 could  pray  heartily  to  God  for  thofe,  to  whom  I  could  not 
 fpeak,  and  whom  I  was  not  allowed  to  fee.  But  at  other 
 times,  my  fplrits  were  fo  flat  and  low,  and  my  bodily  vigour 
 fo  much  wafted,  that  I  had  fcarce  any  aiFeftions  at  all. 
 
 In  December,  I  had  revived  fo  far  as  to  be  able  to  walk 
 abroad,  and  vifit  friends,  and  feem.ed  to  be  on  the  gaining 
 hand  with  regard  to  my  health,  in  the  main,  until  Lord's  day, 
 December  21.  At  which  time  I  went  to  the  public  worfhip  ; 
 snd  it  being  facrament  day,  I  laboured  much,  at  the  Lord's 
 table,  to  bring  forth  a  certain  corruption,  and  have  iijlam^ 
 fiS  being  an  enemy  to  God  and  my  own  foul ;  and  could  not 
 but  hope,  that  I  had  gained  fome  ftrcngth  againll  this,  as 
 well  as  other  corruptions ;  and  felt  fome  brokennefs  of  heart 
 for  my  fm. 
 
 After  this,  having  perhaps  taken  fome  cold,  I  began  10  de- 
 cline as  to  bodily  health  ;  and  continued  to  do  fo,  till  the  latter 
 
 *  About  this  time  he  wrote  the  feventh  letter ^  publiHicd  at  the 
 cod  of  this  account  of  his  life. 
 
 E  e  2  end 
 
120  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  Ji.D.  1747. 
 
 end  of  January  1746-7.  And  having  a  violent  cough,  a  con- 
 ilJerable  fever,  and  afthmatic  difordtr,  and  no  appetite  tor 
 any  manner  of  food,  nor  any  power  of  digeftion.  1  was  re- 
 duced to  (o  low  a  flatc,  that  my  friends  (1  believe)  generally 
 dcfpalred  of  my  life;  and  l^me  of  them,  for  fome  tiuie  t()ge« 
 ther,  thought  I  could  fcaice  live  a  day  to  an  end.  In  this  time, 
 I  could  think  of  nothing  with  any  application  of  mind,  and 
 feemcd  to  be  in  a  great  mcafure  void  of  all  afftftion,  and  was 
 cxercifed  with  great  temptations ;  but  )et  was  not,  ordinarily, 
 afraid  of  death. 
 
 On  Lord's  day,  February  i.  Though  in  a  very  weak  and 
 low  flate,  I  enjoyed  a  conilderable  deal  of  comfort  and  Iwcet- 
 ncfs  in  divine  things  ;  and  was  enabled  to  plead  and  uie  argu- 
 ments with  God  in  prayer,  I  think,  with  a  child-like  Ipirit. 
 That  paiTage  of  fcripiure  occurred  to  ray  mind,  and  gave  me 
 great  alTiflance,  '  it  yc,  being  evil,  know  how  to  gi\e  g^od 
 *'  gifts  to  your  children,  how  much  more  will  your  heavenly 
 *'  Father  give  the  holy  Spirit  to  them  that  afk  him  f"  This 
 text  I  was  helped  to  plead,  and  infift  upon;  and  law  the  di- 
 vine faithfulnelb  engaged  for  dealing  with  me  better  than  any 
 earthly  paren  can  do  with  his  child.  1  hii  leafon  fo  rehefh- 
 ed  my  foul,  that  my  body  fcerned  alio  to  be  a  gainer  by  it. 
 And  from  this  time,  ]  began  gradually  to  amend.  And  as  I 
 recovered  fjme  ftrength,  vigjur,  and  fpirit,  I  found  at  times 
 f  ime  freedom  and  lite  in  the  exerciiet  ot  devotion,  and  lomc 
 1  -ngings  after  ipirituality  and  a  liie  of  uiefulnels  to  the  mte- 
 rrftj,  of  the  great  Redeemer :  although  at  other  times,  Iwas 
 awruUy  bantn  and  iifelcls,  and  out  ot  frame  for  the  things  of 
 God  ;  fo  that  I  was  ready  often  to  cry  out,  "  Oh  that  it  were 
 "  with  me  as  in  months  paft!  Qh  that  God  had  taken  me 
 away  in  the  midll  of  my  ulefulnefs,  with  a  fudden  ftroke,  that 
 I  might  not  have  been  under  tnecelTity  of  trifling  away  time 
 in  diverfions!  Oh  that  I  had  never  lived  to  ipcnd  lo  much 
 preci.ius  time,  in  fo  poor  a  manner,  and  to  fo  little  purpoie ! 
 Thus  I  often  relieved,  was  grieved,  afliamed,  and  even  con- 
 founded, funk  and  difcouraged. 
 
 On  Tucfday,  Febiuary  24.  I  was  able  to  ride  as  far  as 
 Newark,  (having  been  corfined  within  EIifabeth-1  own  al- 
 moft  fuur  months),  and  the  next  day  returned  to  Elifabeth- 
 Town.  ^'^y  fpirits  were  fomewhat  reficfhed  with  the  ride, 
 though  my  body  was  weary. 
 
 On  Saturday,  February  28.  Was  vifited  by  an  Indian  of 
 iny  own  congregation;  who  brought  me  letters,  and  good 
 news  of  the  h  ber  and  good  behaviour  of  my  people  in  gene- 
 ral: this  refrtJli,cd  my   loul;  1  could  not  but  loon  retire,  and 
 
 blefs 
 
Bt.^9'      Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  221 
 
 falefs  God  for  his  goodnefs ;  and  found,  I  trufl,  a  truly  thank- 
 ful frame  of  fpirit,  that  God  fecmcd  to  be  building  up  that 
 congregation  tor  himlelf. 
 
 Oil  Wednefday,  March  4.  I  met  with  reproof  from  a  frien^^ 
 which,  although  1  thought  I  did  not  deferve  it  from  him,  5  et 
 %VaS  (1  truft)  bleffed  of  God  t  >  make  me  more  tenderly  afraid 
 of  lln,  more  jealous  over  myfelf,  and  more  concerned  to  keep 
 bj.th  heart  and  life  pure  and  unblameable :  it  hkewife  caufed 
 jne  to  r(.flf^<5t  on  my  part  deadnefs,  and  want  of  fpirituality, 
 and  to  abhor  myfelr,  and  look  onmyielfmoft  unworthy.  This 
 frame  of  mind  continued  the  next  day ;  and  for  feveral  days 
 after,  I  grieved,  to  think,  that  in  my  neceffary  diverfions 
 I  had  not  maintained  more  ferioufnefs,  folemnity,  heavenly 
 affjclion  and  converfation.  And  thus  my  fpiiits  were  often 
 d-preiTed  and  funk ;  and  yet,  I  truft,  that  reproof  was  made 
 to  be  beneficial  to  me. 
 
 Wednelday,  March  11.  being  kept  in  Elifabeth-Town  as 
 a  day  of  farting  and  piayer,  I  was  able  to  attend  public  wor- 
 fliip ;  which  was  the  fi.ft  time  I  was  ?bk  fo  to  do  after  De- 
 cember 21.  Oh,  how  much  weakncfs  and  diftreft  did  God 
 ca'ry  me  through  in  this  fpace  of  time!  But  having  obtained 
 help  from  hlrn,  I  yet  live:  Oh  that  I  could  live  more  to  his 
 glory! 
 
 Lord's  day,  March  ii;.  Was  able  again  to  attend  the  public 
 worfliip,  and  felt  fomc  caineft  defires  of  being  rertored  to  the 
 minifterial  work .  felt,  I  think,  fome  fpirit  and  life,  to  fpeak 
 for  God. 
 
 Wednefday,  March  18.  Rode  out  with  a  defign  to  vifit  my 
 people ;  and  the  next  day  arrived  among  them  :  was  i.nder 
 great  dcjeftion  in  my  journey. 
 
 On  Friday  morning,  I  rofe  early,  walked  about  among  my 
 people,  and  inquired  into  their  ftate  and  concerns  ;  and  found 
 an  additional  weight  and  burden  on  my  Ipirits,  upon  hearing 
 fome  things  difagreeable.  I  endeavoured  to  go  to  God  with 
 my  diftreffes,  and  made  fome  kind  of  lamentable  complaint  j 
 and  in  a  broken  manner  fpread  my  difficulties  before  God; 
 but  notwithftanding,  miy  mind  continued  very  gloomy.  A- 
 bout  ten  o'clock,  I  called  my  people  together,  and  after  having 
 explained  and  fung  a  pfalm,  I  prayed  with  them.  There 
 was  a  confiderable  deal  of  affection  among  them ;  I  doubt 
 not,  in  fome  inrtances,  that  which  was  more  than  merely 
 natural. 
 
 [This  Was  the  h'fi  interview  that  he  ever  had  with  his 
 peopi?.     About  eleven  o'clock  the  fcmc  d::y,  he  left  them; 
 
 and 
 
i2a  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F  A.D.  1747. 
 
 and  the  next  day  came  to  Eli fabeth- Town  ;  his  melancholy  re- 
 maining flill:  and  he  continued  for  a  confiderable  time  under 
 a  great  degree  of  dejection  through  vapour^'  difordcrs.j 
 
 Saturday,  ]\Iarch  28.  Was  taken  this  morning  with  violent 
 griping  pains.  Thele  pains  were  extreme,  and  conflant,  for 
 ievcral  hours;  fo  that  it  feemed  impoflible  for  me,  without 
 a  miracle,  to  live  twenty-four  hours  in  fuch  diftrefs.  I  lay 
 confined  to  my  bed,  the  whole  day,  and  in  diflrefling  pain, 
 all  the  former  part  of  it :  but  it  pleafed  God  to  blels  means 
 for  the  abatement  of  my  diftrcfs.  Was  exceedingly  weaken- 
 ed by  this  pain,  and  continued  fo  for  feveral  days  following; 
 being  exercifed  with  a  fever,  cough,  and  nofturnal  fweats. 
 In  this  diftrelTed  cafe,  fo  long  as  my  head  was  free  of  vapoury 
 confufions,  death  appeared  agreeable  to  me ;  1  looked  on  it 
 as  the  end  of  toils,  and  an  entrance  into  a  place  "  where  the 
 **  weary  are  at  refl: ;"  and,  I  think,  1  had  fome  relifh  of  the 
 entertainments  of  the  heavenly  fjatc ;  fo  that  by  thefe  I  was 
 allured  and  drawn,  as  well  as  driven  by  the  fatigues  of  life. 
 Oh,  how  happy  it  is,  to  be  drawn  by  delires  of  a  ftate  of  per- 
 fect holinefsl 
 
 Saturday,  April  4.  Was  funk  and  dejeiSted,  very  refllefs 
 and  uneafy,  by  reafon  of  the  mifimprovement  of  time ;  and 
 yet  knew  not  what  to  do :  I  longed  to  fpend  time  in  fafting 
 and  prayer,  that  I  might  be  delivered  from  indolence  and 
 e^ldnefsin  the  things  of  God;  but,  alas,  I  had  not  bodily 
 Itrength  for  thefe  exercifes!  Oh,  how  ble^cd  a  thing  is  it, 
 to  enjoy  peace  of  confcience!  but  how  dreadful  is  a  want 
 of  inward  peace  and  compofure  of  foul!  It  is  impoflible,  I 
 find,  to  enjoy  this  happinefs  without  redeeming  time,  and 
 maintaining  a  fpiritual  hara^  of  mind. 
 
 Lord's  day,  April  5.  It  grieved  me,  to  find  myfelf  fo  in- 
 conceivably barren.  My  foul  thirfled  for  grace  :  but,  alas, 
 iiowfar  was  I  from  obtaining  what  I  faw  fo  exceeding  excel- 
 lent I  I  was  ready  to  defpair  of  ever  being  a  holy  creature ; 
 and  yet  my  foul  was  dehrous  of  folUiving  hard  after  God; 
 but  never  did  I  fee  myfelf  fo  far  from  having  apprehended,  or 
 being  already  perfect,  as  at  this  time.  The  Loid's  lupper 
 being  this  day  adminiflered,  1  attended  the  ordinance  :  and 
 though  I  faw  in  myfelf  a  dreadful  emptinefs,  and  want  of 
 grace,  and  faw  myfelf  as  it  were  at  an  infinite  diilance  from 
 that  purity  which  is  becoming  the  gofpcl ;  yet  in  the  feafon 
 ef  communion,  efpecially  in  the  time  oi  the  diflribution  of 
 the  bread,  1  enjoyed  feme  warmth  of  affcflicn,  and  felt  a 
 t-tnicx hve  to  the  brethren;  and,  I  think,  to  the  glorious  Re- 
 deemer, 
 
JEt.ii).      Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  ii-^ 
 
 tkemer,  the  firfl-born  among  them.  I  endeavoured  then  to 
 irlnp-  forth  mine  and  his  enemies,  and  Jlay  them  before  him  ; 
 and" found  great  freedom  in  begging  deliverance  from  this 
 fpiritual  death,  as  well  as  in  alking  divine  favours  for  my 
 friends,  and  congregation,  and  the  church  of  Chrill  in  ge- 
 neral. 
 
 Tuefday,  April  7.  In  the  afternoon,  rode  to  Newark,  in 
 ftrder  to  marry  the  Reverend  Mr  Dickinfon  * ;  and  in  the 
 evening,  performed  that  work.  Afterwards,  rode  home  to 
 Elifabeth- Town,  in  a  pleafant  frame,  full  of  compofure  and 
 fweetnefs. 
 
 Thurfday,  April  9.  Attended  the  ordination  of  Mr 
 Tucker  f,  and  afterwards  the  examination  of  Mr  Smith  :  was 
 in  a  comfortable  frame  of  mind  this  day,  and  felt  my  heart,  I 
 think,  fometimes  in  a  fpiritual  frame. 
 
 Friday,  April  10.  Spent  the  forenoon  in  Prelbyterial  buf- 
 nefs :  in  the  afternoon,  rode  to  Elifabeth- Town  ;  found  my 
 brother  John  there  +  :  fpent  fome  time  in  converfation  with 
 him ;  but  was  extreme  v/eak  and  outdone,  my  fpirits  confi- 
 derably  funk,  and  ray  mind  dejected. 
 
 Monday,  April  13.  AfTifted  in  examining  my  brother.  In 
 the  evening,  was  in  a  folemn  devout  frame.;  but  was  much 
 ©verdone  and  opprefled  with  a  violent  head-ach. 
 
 *  The  late  learned  and  very  excellent  Mr  Jonathan  Dickinfon, 
 paftor  of  a  church  in  Elifabeth- Town,  prefident  of  the  college  of 
 New- Jerfey,  and  one  of  the  correfpondents  of  the  honourable  fociety 
 in  Scotland  for  propagating  Chriftian  knowledge  :  who  had  a  great 
 efteem  for  Mr  Brainerd,  and  had  kindly  entertained  him  in  his 
 houfe  during  his  ficknefs  in  the  winter  part ;  and  who,  after  a  (hort 
 jllnefs,  died  in  the  next  enfuing  Oiflober,  tv/o  days  before  Mr 
 Jirainerd. 
 
 f  A  worthy  pious  young  gentleman  ;  who  lived  In  the  miniftry 
 but  a  very  fliort  time  :  he  died  at  Stratfield  in  Conne»5licut,  the 
 December  following  his  ordination,  being  a  little  while  after  Mr 
 Brainerd's  death  at  Northampton.  He  was  taken  ill  on  a  journey, 
 returning  from  a  vifu  to  his  friends  at  Milton  (in  the  Maffachufetis), 
 which,  as  I  take  it,  was  his  native  place,  and  Harvard-college  the 
 place  of  his  education. 
 
 X  This  brother  of  his  had  been  fent  for  by  the  correfpondents, 
 to  take  care  of,  and  inftrudt  Mr  Brainerd's  congregation  of  Indians  ; 
 he  being  obliged  by  his  illnefs  to  be  abfent  from  them.  And  he 
 continu«?d  to  take  care  of  them  till  Mr  Brainerd's  death  :  and  fince 
 his  death,  has  been  ordained  h.\%fucceJJor\zi  his  miflion,  and  to  the 
 charge  of  his  congregation ;  which  continues  much  to  flourifh  under 
 his  pafloral  care. 
 
 Tu?fday, 
 
«24  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  J.  D.  174/. 
 
 Tuefday,  April  14.  Was  able  t  j  do  little  or  nothing :  fpenr 
 feme  time  with  Mr  Byiam  and  other  friendi-.  This  day  my 
 brother  went  to  ray  people. 
 
 Wcdnefday,  April  15.  Found  fome  freedom  at  the  throne 
 of  grace,  feveral  times  this  day.  In  the  afternoon,  was  very 
 •weak,  and  fpcnt  the  time  to  very  little  purpofe  ;  and  yet  ia 
 the  evening,  had  (I  thought)  fome  religious  warmth  and  i'pi- 
 ritual  defires  in  prayer  :  my  foul  feemed  to  go  forth  after  God, 
 and  take  complacence  in  his  divine  perfeftions.  But,  alas! 
 afterwards  awfully  let  down  my  watch,  and  grew  Carelefs  ancj 
 fee  u  re. 
 
 Thurfday,  April  16.  Was  in  bitter  anguifh  of  foul,  in  the 
 morning,  fuch  as  I  have  fcarce  ever  felt,  with  a  fenfe  of  fm 
 and  guilt.  I  continued  in  diilrefs  the  whole  day,  attempting 
 to  pray  where-ever  I  v/ent ;  and  indeed  could  not  help  fo  do- 
 ing :  but  looked  upon  myfelf  fo  vile,  I  dared  not  look  any 
 body  in  the  face;  and  was  even  grieved,  that  any  body  ftiould 
 ihew  me  any  refpeft,  or  at  leaft,  that  they  IhoulJ  be  fo  de- 
 ceived as  to  think  I  dcferved  it. 
 
 Friday,  April  17.  In  the  evening,  could  not  but  think,  that 
 God  helped  me  to  "  draw  near  to  the  throne  of  grace,"  though 
 moft  unw'irthy,  and  gave  me  a  fenfe  of  his  lavuur ;  which 
 gave  me  inexpreflible  lupport  and  encouragement ;  though  I 
 fcarcely  dared  to  hope  the  mercy  was  real,  it  appeared  {o 
 great :  yet  could  not  but  rejoice,  that  ever  God  (hould  dif- 
 cover  his  reconciled  face  to  fuch  a  vile  fmner.  Shame  and 
 confufron,  at  times,  covered  me  ;  and  then  hope,  and  joy,  and 
 admiration  of  divine  goodnels  gained  the  aicendant-  Some- 
 times, I  could  not  but  admire  the  divine  goodnels,  that  the 
 Lord  had  not  let  me  fall  into  all  the  grofleft  vileft  afts  of  fms 
 and  open  fcandal,  that  could  be  th*;ught  of;  and  felt  myfelf  fo 
 necellitatcd  to  praife  God,  that  this  was  ready  for  a  litrle 
 while  to  fwallow  up  my  fliarae  and  preflurc  of  Ipirit  on  ac- 
 count of  my  fms. 
 
 [After  this,  his  dejeftion  and  preffure  of  fpirit  returned  j 
 and  he  remained  under  it  the  two  next  days.] 
 
 Monday,  April  20.  Was  in  a  very  difordered  ftate,  and 
 kept  my  bed  mofl;  of  the  day.  I  enjoyed  a  little  more  com- 
 fort, than  in  feveralofthe  preceding  days.  This  day  I  ar- 
 rived  at  the  age  of  twenty-nine  ycais. 
 
 Tuefday,  April  21.  J  iec  out  on  my  journey  for  New- Eng- 
 land, ill  order  (if  ic  might  be  the  will   of  God)   to   recover 
 
 my 
 
/Et.iQ.      Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  325 
 
 any    healch   by  riding:    travelled   to   Ncw-Yt^rk,  an  J  thei© 
 lodged. 
 
 [This  proved  his  final  departure  from  Nev/-Jerfey.- 
 
 travelled  ilawly,  and  arrived  among  his  friends  at  Eail- 
 Haddani,  about  the  beginning  of  May.  There  is  very  little 
 account  in  his  diary,  of  the  titne  that  pafi'ed  from  his  fetting 
 out  on  this  journey  to  May  10.  He  ipeaks  of  his  fornetimcs 
 fi  idmg  his  heart  rejoicing  in  the  glorijus  perfeclions  of  God, 
 aiid  longing  to  live  to  him  ;  but  ciraplains  of  the  uniixednels 
 of  his  thjugnts,  and  their  being  eafily  diverted  frum  divine 
 fubje^h,  and  cries  out  of  his  leann,;fs,  as  teftifying  againft  him, 
 in  the  loudeft  manner.  And  concerning  thofe  diverjions  lie 
 was  obliged  to  ufe  for  his  health,  he  fays,  that  he  Ivjiaetimes 
 found  he  cjuld  ufe  diverlions  with  "fmgienefs  of  heart,"  aim- 
 ing at  the  glory  of  God;  but  that  he  alio  found  there  was  a 
 iieceifity  ot  great  care  and  watch fulnefs,  left  he  fhould  lofe 
 that  Ipirirual  ten.p  t  of  mind  in  his  diverfions,  and  left  tlicy 
 fhould  degenerate  mto  what  was  mertly  fcififh,  without  any 
 fuprerae  auu  at  the  glory  of  God  in  them. J 
 
 Lord*'  day,  May  10.  (At  Had-Lime)  I  could  not  but  feel 
 fume  meafure  of  gratitude  to  God  at  this  time,  (v^herein  I 
 ivas  much  extrcifed),  that  he  had  alwaj^t  difpofed  rne,  in  n.y 
 miniftry  to  inhft  '.m  the  great  doctrines  of  1  ecejurathn,  the 
 »eiucieatiire,fa>th:n  Chr'Jl,  progrejjivt  fc^ndlif cation,  fu- 
 preme  kve  to  God,  living  entirely  to  the  glory  'f  God,  ht'.ng. 
 not  our  ovjK,  and  the  like.  God  has  helped  me  to  fee,  in  the 
 fureft  manner,  from  time  to  time,  that  thefe,  and  the  like 
 doctrines,  neceftarily  connc6Vcd  with  them,  arc  the  only  f.ur.- 
 dation  of  fafety  and  laivation  for  perifhing  fmners ;  and  that 
 thofe  di'.ine  difpofitionb-,  which  are  ccnfinant  heret-o,  aic 
 xhzx.  hoUnefs ,  "without  which  no  man  lliall  fee  the  Lord:" 
 the  exercile  of  ihefe  God-)ike  tempers,  wherein  the  foul  a61s 
 in  a  kind  of  concert  with  God,  and  would  be  and  do  eveiy 
 thing  that  is  pleafing  to  God;  this,  I  favv,  would  ftand  by  tl-e 
 foul  in  a  dying  hour  ;  for  God  muft,  I  think,  deny  himfelfy 
 if  he  caft  away  his  giu^i  image,  even  the  foul  that  is  one  in  de- 
 fires  with  him  lei  f. 
 
 Lord':,  day.  May  17.  (At  Millington)  Spent  the  forenoon 
 at  home,  being  unable  to  attend  the  pviblic  worfnip.  At  this 
 time,  God  gave  me  fomc  affcifbijig  fenfe  of  my  own  vilc- 
 nefs,  and  the  exceeding  fmfulncfs  of  my  heart;  that  there 
 fecmed  to  be  nothing  but  fm  and  corruption  within  me.  "  In« 
 '"  numerable  evils  compalFtd  me  about;''  my  want   of  fpj. 
 
 F  f  rituality 
 
ii6  t  ii  E     L  J  Y  K     O  t  J  D.  1747, 
 
 rkuality  and  holj'  living,  my  negleft  of  God,  and  living  ta 
 
 niyfelf. All  the  abominations  of  my  heart  and  life  leemed 
 
 to  be  open  to  my  view ;  and  I  had  nothing  to  fay,  but,  "  God 
 
 "  be  merciful   to   me   a   finner." Towards   noon,  I  faw, 
 
 that  the  grace  of  God  in  Chrift  is  infinitely  free  towards  fin-' 
 Iters,  and  fuch  fmncrs  as  I  was ;  I  alfo  faw,  that  God  is  the 
 fuprenic  good,  that  in  his  prefence  is  life  ;  and  I  began  ta 
 long  to  die,  th  it  I  might  })e  'with  him,  in-  a  ftate  of  freedom' 
 from  all  fin.  Oh,  how  a  fmall  glimpfe  of  his  excellency  re- 
 frelhed  my  fouH  Oh,  how  worthy  is  the  bleflfed  God  to  be 
 loved,  adored,  and  delighted  in,  for  himfelf,  for  his  own  di- 
 vine excellencies ! 
 
 Though  I  felt  much  dulnefs,  and  want  of  a  fpirit  of  prayer, 
 tills  week;  yet  I  had  fome  glimpfes  of  the  excellency  of  di- 
 vine things ;  and  efpeciaH'y  one  morning,  in  fecret  medita- 
 tfion  and  prayer,  the  excellency  and  beauty  of  holinefs,  as  a 
 likenefs  to  the  glorious  God,  was  fo  difcovered  to  me,  that  I 
 began  to  long  carnefHy  to  be  in  that  world  where  holinefs 
 dwells  in  perfeflion :  and  I  feemed  x.o  long  for  this  pcrfeft 
 holinefs,  not  fo  much  for  the  fake  of  my  own  happinefs, 
 (although  I  faw  clearly  that  this  was  the  greatcfi:,  yea,  the 
 only  happinefs  of  the  foul),  as  that  I  might  pleafe  God,  live 
 entirely  to  him,  and  glorify  him  to  the  utraoft  fiireteh  of  my 
 i'ational  powers  and  capacities. 
 
 Lord's  day,  May  24.  (At  Long-Meadow  in  Springfield) 
 Could  not  but  think,  as  I  have  often  remarked  to  others,  that 
 much  m  )re  of  true  rel'igun  confifts  in  deep  humility,  broken' 
 Tiefs  of  heart,  and  an  abajing  fenfe  of  barrennefs  and  luant  of 
 grace  av.d  hol'intfs,  than  mod  who  are  called  Chr'ftians,  ima- 
 gine ;  efpecially  thofe  who  have  been  ell'eemed  the  converts  of 
 the  late  day  ;  many  of  whom  feem  to  know  of  no  otlrer  re- 
 ligion but  elevated  yo)'/  and  affe^ions,  arifmg  only  from  fome 
 flights  of  hnag'niation,  or  fome  faggeflion  made  to  their 
 mind,  o^  Chrifi's  being  theif's,  God's  laving  them,  and  the 
 like. 
 
 [On  Thurfday,  May  28.  He  came  from  Long-Meadow  to 
 Nortnampton ;  appearing  vafliy  better  than,  by  his  account, 
 he  had  been  in  the  winter ;  indeed  ^o  well,  that  he  was  able 
 to  ride  twenty-five  miles  in  a  day,  and  to  walk  half  a  mile  ; 
 and  appeared  cheerful,  and  free  from  melancholy :  but  yet 
 undoubtedly,  at  that  time,  in  a  confirmed,  incurable  confump- 
 tion. 
 
 I  had  had  much  opportunity,  before  this,  of  particular  in- 
 formation concerning  him,  from  many  that  were  well-  ac- 
 quainted 
 
^/.  30.     Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  ITnT  E  R  D.  227 
 
 quainted  with   him ;  and  had  myfclf  once  an  opportunity  of 
 conliderable  converfation   and  feme   acquaintance  with  him, 
 at    New-Haven,  near  four  years  before,  in  the  time  of  the 
 commencement  when  he  otFered  that  confeffion  to  the  reftor  of 
 the  college,  that  has  been  aheady  mentioned  in  this  hiftory; 
 I  being  one  he  was  pJeafed  then  fevcral  times  to   confult  on 
 that  affair:  but  now  I  had  opportunity  for   a  more  full   ac- 
 cjuaintance  with  him.     I  found  him  remarkably  fociable,  plea- 
 fant,  and  entertaining  in  his  converfation  ;  yet  folid,  favoury, 
 fpiritual,  and  very  profitable ;  appearing  meek,  modeft,  and 
 humble,  far  from  any  ftitfnefs,  morofenefs,  fupcrftitious  de- 
 murenefs,  or  affedled  fmgularity  in  fpecch  or  behaviour,  and 
 feeming  to  naufeate  all  fuch  things.     We  enjoyed  not  only 
 the  benefit  of  his  converfation,  but  had  the  comfort  and  ad- 
 vantage of  hearing  him  pray  in  the  family,  from  time  to  time. 
 His  manner  of  praying  was  very   agreeable;  mofi:  becoming  a 
 worm  of  the  duft,  and  a  difciple  of  Chrifi:,  addrefling  to   an 
 infinitely   great  and  holy   God,  and  Father  of  mercies ;  not 
 with  florid  expreifions,  or  a  ftudied  eloquence  ;  not  with  any 
 intemperate  vehemence,  or  indecent  boldnefs ;  at  the  great- 
 eft  diftance  from  any  appearance  of  oftentation,  and  from   e- 
 very   thing  that  might  look  as  though  he  meant  to  recom- 
 mend himfelf  to  thofe  that  were  about  him,  or  fet  himfelf  oft 
 to  their  acceptance ;  free  too  from  vain   repetitions,  without 
 impertinent  excurfions,    or  needlefs   multiplying   of  words. 
 He  expreffed  himfelf  with  the  ftriclefl  propriety,  with  weight, 
 and  pungency ;  and  yet  what  his  lips  uttered  feemed  to  l?ow 
 from  the  fulnefs  if  his  heart,  as  deeply  impreffed  with  a  great 
 and  folemn  fenfe  of  our  necefTitles,  unworthinefs,  and  depen- 
 dance,  and  of  God's  infinite  greatnefs,  excellency,  and   fuffi- 
 ciency,  rather  than  merely  from  a  warm  and  fruitful  brain, 
 pouring  out  good  expreffions.     And  I  know  not,  that  ever  I 
 heard  him  fo  much  as  afk  a  blelTing  or  return  thanks  at  table, 
 but  there  was   fomething  remarkable  to  be  obferved  both  in 
 the  matter  and  manner  of  the  performance.     In  his   prayers, 
 he  infilled  much  on  the  profperity  of  Zion,  the  advancem.ent 
 of  Chrift's  kingdom  in  the  world,  and  the  flourithing  and  pro- 
 pagation of  religion  among  the    Indians.     And  he  generally 
 made  it  one  petition  in  his  prayer,  "  that  v.c  might  not  out- 
 ^'  Jive  our  ufefulnefs."] 
 
 Lord's  day.  May  31.  [At  Northampton,]  I  bad  little  in- 
 ward fwcetncfs  in  religion,  mofi:  of  the  week  paft ;  not  reals- 
 fing  and  beholding  fpiritually  the  ^l^^ry  of  God,  and  the  ble/Jed 
 Redeemer:  from  whence  always  arife  wj>  comforts  and  joys  ia 
 
 F  f  2  religion. 
 
128  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  P  J.  D.  1747. 
 
 rd  ^ion,  if  T  have  any  at  all :  and  if  I  cannot  fo  behold  the 
 ex:c.llencies  and  perfeclii  ns  of  God,  as  to  cauic  mu'  to  rejoice 
 in  nim  for  what  he  is  /';:  himjelf,  1  have  no  folid  foundation 
 fo:  joy.  To  rejoice,  only  bicaufe  I  apprehend  1  have  an  /«. 
 terej}  hi  Ch  //,  and  Ihall  be  finally  iiaved,  is  a  poor  lucan  bu- 
 iinefa  indeed. 
 
 [This  week,  he  confulted  Dr.  Mather,  at  my  houfe,  con- 
 cerning his  illnefs;  who  plainly  told  him,  that  tlieie  were' 
 great  evidences  of  his  being  in  a  coniirnied  Cjijumytion, 
 and  that  he  could  give  him  n  >  encouragement,  that  he  fnould 
 ever  recover.  But  it  feemcd  not  to  occafion  the  leaii  dilcvui- 
 pofure  in  him,  nor  to  make  any  manner  ot  alteration  as  to  the 
 cheerfulnefb  and  ferenity  of  his  mind,  or  the  freedom  or  plea- 
 fantnefs  of  his  convcrfati^n.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  June  7.  My  attention  was  greatly  engaged, 
 and  my  foul  ib  drawn  forth,  this  day,  by  what  I  heard  ut  the 
 *'  exceeding  precioufnefs  of  the  faving  grace  of  God's  Spirit," 
 that  it  almoft  overcame  my  body,  in  iiiy  weak  flare:  1  faw, 
 that  true  grace  is  exceeding  precious  indeed  ;  that  it  is  very 
 rare  ;  and  that  there  is  but  a  very  fmall  degree  of  it,  even 
 ■where  the  reality  of  it  is  to  be  found  ;  at  leafl,  I  faw  this  to 
 be  my  cafe. 
 
 In  the  preceding  week,  I  enjoyed  forae  comfortable  fea* 
 fons  of  meditation.  One  morning,  the  caufe  of  God  ap- 
 peared exceeding  precious  to  me  :  the  Redeemer's  kingdom  i$ 
 all  that  is  valuable  in  the  earth,  and  I  could  not  but  long  for 
 the  promotion  of  it  in  the  world:  I  faw  alfo,  that  this  caufe 
 i.->  God's,  that  he  has  an  infinitely  greater  regard  and  concern 
 for  it,  than  F could  pofTibly  have;  that  if  I  have  any  true  love 
 to  this  bleiTed  intereft,  it  is  only  a  drop  derived  from  that 
 ocean;  hence,  I  was  ready  ro  ''lift  up  my  head  with  joy ;" 
 and  conclude,  "Well,  if  God's  caufe  be  fo  dear  and  precious 
 "  to  him,  he  wiil  promote  it."  And  thus  I  did  as  it  were 
 reft  on  God,  that  furely  he  would  promote  that  which  was  fo 
 agreeable  to  M<^  own  will  ;  though  the  time  vhen,  mufl  ftill 
 be  left  to  his  fovercign  plealure. 
 
 {He  was  advifed  by  phyficians  ftill  to  continue  riding,  as 
 what  would  tend,  above  any  other  means,  to  prolong  his  life. 
 He  v\'as  at  a  lofs,  for  fome  time,  which  way  to  bend  his  courfe 
 n*.xt;  but  finally  determined  to  ride  from  hence  to  Boilon; 
 wc  having  conckukd  that  one  of  this  family  fhould  go  with 
 him,  and  be  helpful  to  him  iii  his  '^eak  and  lovv-  fiSte.] 
 
 'i'uqfd^', 
 
^/.  30.       M  R    D  A  V  I  D     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  129 
 
 Tueld  y,  June  9.  I  fct  out  on  a  journey  from  North- 
 Anipton  tJ  Jiofton.  Travelled  flowly,  and  got  fome  acquaint- 
 aiice  with  divers  miniftv.n-s  on  the  road. 
 
 I  having  mw  onitinucd  to  lide  tor  feme  confiderable  time 
 together,  telt  mylelt  much  better  than  I  had  formerly  done; 
 and  I  found,  that  in  proportion  to  tie  profpeft  1  had  ot  being 
 rejftored  to  a  ftate  ot  ulelulnefs,  {o  1  defired  the  continuance 
 of  life  :  but  death  appeared,  inconceivably  more  dehrable  to 
 me,  than  a  uftlefs  I  fe  ;  yet  blelfed  be  God,  I  found  my  heait, 
 at  times,  fully  religned  and  reconciled  to  this  greateft  of  af- 
 iliflions,  if  God  faw  fir  thus  to  deal  with  me. 
 
 Friday,  July  1 2.  i  arrived  in  Boflon  thit  day,  fomewhar 
 fatigued  with  my  journey.  Obfervcd,  that  there  is  noiefty 
 but  in  God  :  fatigues  of  body,  and  anxieties  of  mind,  attend 
 us,  both  in  town  and  country  ;  no  place  is  exempted. 
 
 Lord's  day,  June  14.  I  enjoyed  fome  enlargement  and 
 fweetnefs  in  family-piaycr,  as  well  as  in  fecret  exercifes; 
 God  appeared  excellent,  his  ways  full  of  pleafure  and  peace, 
 and  ail  I  wanted  was  a  fpirit  of  holy  fervency,  to  live  to  him. 
 
 Wednefday,  June  17.  This,  and  the  two  preceding  days, 
 1  fpent  mainly  in  vifiting  the  miniffcrs  of  the  town,  and  was 
 treated  with  great  refpeft  by  them. 
 
 On  Thurfday,  June  18.  I  was  taken  exceeding  ill,  and 
 brought  to  the  gates  of  death,  by  the  breaking  of  fmall  ulcers 
 in  my  lungs,  as  my  phyfician  fuppofed.  In  this  extreme 
 Weak  ftate  I  continued  for  feveral  v.eeks,  and  was  frequently 
 reduced  fo  low,  as  to  be  utteily  fpeechlefs,  and  not  able  fo 
 much  as  to  whifper  a  word;  and  even  after  I  had  fo  far  re- 
 vived, as  to  walk  about  houfe,  and  to  fttp  out  of  doors,  I 
 ■Uas  exercifed  every  day  with  a  faint  turn,  which  continued 
 tifually  four  or  five  hours ;  at  which  times,  though  I  was  not 
 utterly  fpeechlefs,  fo  but  that  I  could  fay  Tes  or  No,  yet  I 
 could  not  converfe  at  all,  nor  fpeak  one  fentence,  without 
 making  flops  for  breath  ;  and  divers  times  in  this  feafon,  my 
 friends  gathered  round  my  bed,  to  fee  me  breathe  my  lafl, 
 \vhich   they   looked  for  every  moment,  as  I  myfelf  alio  did. 
 
 How  I  was,  the  firfl:  day  or  two  of  my  illnefs,  with  regard 
 to  the  cxercife  of  reafon,  I  fcarccly  know  ;  but  I  believe  I 
 was  fomething  fhattered  with  the  violence  of  the  fever,  at 
 times  :  but  the  third  day  of  my  illnefs,  and  conflantly  after- 
 wards, for  four  or  five  weeks  t :gether,  I  enjoyed  as  much 
 fercnity  of  mind,  and  cicarnefs  of  thought,  as  perhaps  I  ever 
 did  in  my  life  ;  and  I  think,  my  mind  never  penetrated  with 
 fe  much  cafe  aiid  freedom  into  divine  things,  as  at  this  time ; 
 
 and 
 
030  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F  A.  D,  1747. 
 
 and  I  never  felt  fo  capable  of  demonftrating  the  truth  of 
 many  important  doftrines  of  the  gofpel  as  now.  And  as  I 
 faw  clearly  the  truth  of  thofc  great  doclrines,  which  are  juft- 
 ly  filled  the  dodrines  cf  grace  ;  fo  I  faw  with  no  Icfs  clear- 
 iiefs,  that  the  ejjence  oi  religion  confifted  in  the  foul's  conform- 
 ity tc  Cod,  and  afting  above  all  felfifh  views,  iox  his  giory^ 
 longing  to  be  for  him,  to  live  to  him,  and  pleafe  and  honour 
 him  in  all  things :  and  this  from  a  clear  view  of  his  infinite 
 excellency  and  worthinefs  in  hijvftlf,  to  be  loved,  adored, 
 "worfhipped,  and  fcrved  by  all  intelligent  creatures.  Thus  I 
 faw,  that  when  a  foul  loves  God  with  a  fupreme  love/  he 
 therein  afts  like  the  blefled  God  himfelf,  Mho  moftjuftly 
 loves  himfelf  in  that  manner:  fo  when  God's  intercft  and  his 
 are  become  one,  and  he  longs  that  God  (liould  be  glorified, 
 and  rejoices  to  think  that  he  is  unchangeably  pofiefled  of  the 
 higheft  glory  and  blcffednefs,  herein  alfo  he  afts  in  conformity 
 to  God:  in  like  manner,  when  the  foul  is  fully  refigned  to, 
 and  reus  fati^-ficd  and  contented  with  the  divine  will,  here  it 
 is  alfo  conformed  to  God. 
 
 1  faw  further,  that  as  this  divine  temper,  whereby  the  foul 
 exalts  God,  and  treads  felf  in  the  dufl,  is  wrought  in  the  foul 
 by  Jod's  difcovering  his  own  glorious  perfeftions  in  the  face 
 tf  Jefus  Chrift  to  it,  by  the  fpecial  influences  of  the  holy 
 iJpirit,  fo  he  cannot  but  have  regard  to  it,  as  his  own  work  ;  and 
 as  it  is  his  image  in  the  foul,  he  cannot  but  take  delight  in  it. 
 Then  I  faw  again,  that  if  God  fiiould  flight  and  rej-eft  his  own 
 moral  image,  he  mufl:  needs  deny  himfe'f;  which  he  cannot  do. 
 And  thus  I  faw  the  /lability  and  infaUlbilty  of  this  religion ; 
 and  that  thofe  who  are  truly  pofTcfled  of  it,  have  the  mofl  com- 
 plete and  fatisfying  evidence  of  their  being  interefled  in  all  the 
 ben,  fits  cfChrift's  redemption,  having  their  hezxl^confonnedtt 
 him;  and  that  thefe,  and  thefe  only,  are  qualified  for  the  employ- 
 ments and  entertainments  of  God's  kingdom  of  glory  ;  as  none 
 but  thefe  have  any  relifli  for  the  bufmefs  of  heaven,  which  is 
 to  afcribe  glory  to  God,  and  not  to  themfelves ;  and  that  God 
 (though  I  would  fpeak  it  with  great  reverence  of  his  name  and 
 perfections)  cannot,  without  denying  himfelf,  finally  cafl 
 iuch  away. 
 
 The  next  thing  I  had  then  to  do,  was  to  inquire,  whether 
 this  was  7ny  religion  :  and  here  God  was  pleafed  to  help  me 
 to  the  moli:  eafy  remembrance  and  critical  review  of  what 
 had  pafTed  in  courfe,  of  a  religious  nature,  through  feveral  of 
 the  latter  years  of  my  life :  and  although  I  could  difcover 
 much  corruption  attending  my  bell  duties,  many  felfifh  views 
 93d  .c;y-nal  er.ds,  much  fpiritual  pride  and  felf- exaltation,  and 
 
 innumerat>lp 
 
Mt.  30.       M  R    Ef  A  V  I  D     B  K  A  1 1^  E  R  D.  23  J 
 
 innumerable  other  evils  which  compafTed  me  about;  I  fayy 
 although  1  now  difcerned  the  fms  of  my  holy  things,  as  well 
 is  other  aftions ;  yet  God  was  pleafed,  as  I  was  reviewing^ 
 quickly  to  put  this  queftion  out  of  doubt,  by  (hewing  me, 
 fnat  I  had,  fram  time  to  time,  afted  above  the  utmolt  influ- 
 ence of  mere  felf-love ;  that  I  had  longed  to  pleafe  ind  glori- 
 fy him,  as  my  highefl  happinefs,  '6c.  And  this  review  was 
 through  grace  attended  with  a  prefent  feeling  of  the  fame 
 divine  temper  of  mind ;  I  felt  now  pleafed,  to  think  of  the 
 glory  of  God,  and  longed  for  heaven,  as  a  Hate  wherein  I 
 might  glorify  God  perfecftly,  rather  than  a  place  of  happinefs 
 for  myfelf :  and  this  feeling  of  the  love  of  God  in  my  heart> 
 which  I  truft  the  Spirit  of  God  excited  in  rae  afrelh,  wa* 
 fufficient  to  give  me  full  fatis faction,  and  make  me  long,  as  I- 
 had  many  times  before  done,  to  be  vt'ith  ChriH: :  I  did  no£ 
 now  Want  any  of  the  fuddcn  fugge/ilons ,  which  many  are  fo 
 pleafed  with,  "  That  Chrift  and  his  benefits  are  mine ;  that  God 
 "  loves  me,"  <6c.  in  order  to  give  me  fatisfadlion  about  my 
 ftate :  no,  my  foul  now  abhorred  thofe  delufions  of  Satan, 
 which  are  thought  to  be  the  immediate  'mtnejs  of  the  Spirit ^ 
 while  there  is  nothing  \ixxt  zxi  ^mpty  fiiggejlion  oi  ?i.  ctil-ixn 
 facf,  without  any  gracious  dilcovery  of  the  divine  glory,  ojt 
 of  the  Spirit's  ivork  in  their  own  hearts :  I  faw  the  awlul  de- 
 lufion  of  this  kind  of  confidences,  as  well  as  of  the  whole  of 
 that  religion,  which  they  ufually  fpring  from,  or  at  leafi:  are 
 the  attendants  of:  the  fa/fe  religion  of  the  late  day,  (though 
 a  day  of  wondrous  grace),  the  iinaginations,  and  impreflions 
 made  only  on  the  ^w/w^/atfeclions,  together  with  the  fudden 
 fuggeftions  made  to  the  mind  by  Satan,  transformed  into  an 
 engel  of  light,  of  certain  fadls  not  revealed  in  fcripture ; 
 thefe,  and  many  like  things,  I  fear,  have  made  up  the  great- 
 er part  of  the  religious  appearance  in  many  places. 
 
 Thefe  things  I  faw  with  great  clearncis,  wher^  I  was 
 thought  to  be  dying.  And  God  gave  me  great  concern  for 
 his  church  and  intereft  in  the  world,  at  this  time :  not  fo  much 
 becaufe  the  late  remarkable  influt:nce  upon  the  minds  of  peo- 
 ple was  abated,  and  alracfl:  wholly  gone,  as  becaufe  that  ialfe 
 religion,  thofe  heats  of  Imagination,  and  wild  and  fclfiih  com- 
 motions of  the  animal  aiieflions,  which  attended  the  work 
 of  grace,  had  prevailed  fo  far.  This  was  that  which  my 
 mind  dwelt  upon,  almoft  day  and  night:  and  this,  to  me, 
 was  the  darkefl  appearance,  re fpefting  religion,  in  the  land; 
 for  it  was  this  chiefly,  that  had  prejudifed  the  world  againfk 
 inward  religion.  And  I  faw,  the  great  mifery  of  all  was-, 
 lha£  ^Q  few  faw  any  manner  of  diff'erence  between  thofe  exer- 
 
 cifes 
 
t33  T  H  E    L  I  F  E    O  F  ,'^.D.  1747, 
 
 fifes  that  were  fpiritual  and  holy,  and  thofe  which  havejelfi 
 love  only  for  then  beginning,  centre,  and  end. 
 
 As  God  was  plcaled  to  afford  me  clcarnefs  of  thought,  and 
 compofure  of  mind,  almoft  continually,  for  feveral  weeks  to- 
 gether, under  my  great  weaknefs ;  fo  he  enabled  me,  in  iomc 
 meafure,  to  improve  my  time  (as  I   hope)  to  valuable  pur- 
 poles.     I  was  enabled  to  write  a  number  of  important  iette/j, 
 to  friends   in  remote  places  *:  and   fometimes  I  wrote  when 
 1  was  Ipeechlcls,  i.  e.  unable  to  maintain  conver(atii)n   with 
 any  b)dy  ;  though  perhaps  1  was  able  tu  fpeak  a  word  or  two 
 fo  as  to  be  heard. — At  ti;is  feaijn  alfo,  wijile  I   was  confined 
 at  Bollon,  I  read  with  care  and  attention  fome  papers  ot  old 
 Mr    Sheparci's,   lately   come  to  light,    and  deligned  fur  the 
 -prcfs :  and  as  I    was  defired,  and  greatly  urged,  made   fome 
 corrections,  where  the   fehle  was  left  dark,  for  want  of  a 
 word  or   two. —  Befides   this,    I   had   many   v  Jit  ants  ;   with 
 whom,  when  I  was  able  to  fpcak,  I  always  coaveried   of  the 
 things  of  religion;  and  was  pecuiiai  !y  diipofed  and  afufted  in 
 dilfmguifliing  between  the  true  2Ln'S  fa^fe  religion  of  the. times: 
 there  was  Icarce  any  fubjedl,  that  ha^  been  matter  of  debate  in 
 the  late  day,  but  what  I  was  at  one  time  or  other  brought  to 
 a  fort  of  necelTuy  to  difcouife  upon,  and  /hew  my  opinion  in; 
 and  that  frequently  before  numbers  of  people  ;  and  efpecially» 
 I  difcourfed  repeatedly  on  the   nature   and  neccffily  of  that 
 humiliation,  fe'^f-empt  nefs,  or    full  conviction   of  a  perfon's 
 being  utterly  ur.donc  in  hirnfelf,  which   is  necefTary  in  order 
 to  a  faving /<2/'M,  and  the  extreme  difficulty  of  being  brought 
 to   this,  and   the   great  danger   there  is  of  perfins  taking  up 
 with  Come  felf-righteous  appearances  of  it.    The  danger  ot  this 
 I   efpecially  dwelt  upon,    being    perfuaJed   that    multitudes 
 perifhi  in    this  hidden  way ;  and  becaufe  fo  little  is  faid  front 
 molt  p-jlpics  to  difcover  any   danger  here:  lb   that   perfcns 
 being  never  cfTeflually   brought  to   die   in    themfelves,    are 
 never  truly  united  to  Chrift,  and  fo  perifii.     I  alio  difcourfed 
 much  on  what  I  take  to  be  the  efTence  of  true  religion,  endea- 
 vouring plainly  to  defcribe  that  God-like   temper  and  difpofi- 
 tion  of  foul,  and  that  holy  converfation  and  behaviour,  that 
 may  jultly  claim  the   honour  of  having   God   for  its  original 
 and  patron.     And  I  have  reafcn  to  hope  Cod  bieffed  njy  way 
 of  difcourfing  and  dirtingui[hing,  to  fume,  both  minifcers  and 
 people;  fo  that  my  time  was  nut  wholly  loft. 
 
 *  Among  thefe  arc  the  eighth,  ninth,  and  tenth  letters,  at  the 
 end  of  this  hiftoiv. 
 
/:^  30.      Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  C33 
 
 [He  was  much  vifited,  while  in  Bofton,  by  many  perfons 
 of  confidcrable  note  and  figure,  and  of  the  beft  charadler, 
 and  by  (ome  of  the  fiift  rank  ;  who  fhcwed  him  uncommon 
 refpefl,  and  appeared  highly  pleafed  and  entertained  with  his 
 converfation.  And  befidcs  his  being  honoured  with  the  com- 
 pany and  rcfpefl  of  minifters  of  the  town,  he  was  vifited  by 
 feveral  minifters  from  various  parts  of  the  country.  And  as 
 he  took  all  (.opportunities  to  difcourfe  of  the  peculiar  nature, 
 anH  dillinguiOiing  charaifters  of  true  fpiritual  and  vital  reli- 
 gi^m,  and  to  bear  hii  teftimony  againft  the  various  falfe  ap- 
 pearances of  it,  conlifling  in,  or  arifing  from  impreffions  on 
 the  imaginatijn,  and  fudden  and  fuppofed  immediate  fug- 
 geftions  of  tiuths,  not  contained  in  the  fcripture,  and  that 
 faith  which  confifls  primarily  in  a  perfon's  **  believing  that 
 "  Chrift  died  for  him  in  particular,"  dc. ;  fo  what  he  faid 
 ■was  for  the  moft  part  heard  with  uncommon  attention  and 
 regard;  anH  his  difcourfes  and  reafonings  appeared  manifeitly 
 to  have  great  weight  and  influence,  with  many  that  he  con- 
 verfed  with,  both  minifters  and  others  *. 
 
 Alfo  the  honourable  Commiflioncrs  in  Bofton,  of  the  in- 
 corporated fociety  in  London  for  propagating  the  gofpel  in 
 New- England,  and  parts  adjacent,  having  newly  had  com- 
 jnitted  to  them  a  legacy  of  the  late  reverend  and  famous  Or 
 Daniel  Williams  of  London,  for  the  fupport  of  ivjo  mij/ioju 
 aries  to  the  Heathen,  were  pleafed,  while  he  was  in  Bofton, 
 to  confult  him  about  a  miftion  to  thofe  Indians  called  the 
 Six  Nations,  particularly  about  the  qualifications  reqv.iflte 
 in  a  miflionary  to  thofe  Indians ;  and  were  fo  fati^fied  with 
 his  fentiments  on  this  head,  and  had  that  confidence  in 
 his  taithfulnefs,  and  his  judgment  and  difcretion  in  things  of 
 this  nature,  that  they  defircd  him  to  undertake  to  find  and 
 recommend  a  couple  of  perfons  fit  to  be  employed  in  this  bu- 
 finefs ;  and  very  much  left  the  matter  with  him. 
 
 Likewife  certain  pi  )us  and  generoufiy  difpofed  gentlemen 
 in  Bofton,  being  moved  by  the  wonderful  narrative  of  his 
 labours  and  fuccefs  among  the  Indians,  in  New-Jerfej^,  and 
 more  efpecially  by  their  converfation  with  him  on  the  fame 
 fubje6t,  took  opportunity  to  inquire  more  particularly  into 
 the  ftate  and  neccllities  of  his   congregation,  and  the   fchool 
 
 *  I  have  had  advantage  for  the  more  full  information  of  his  con- 
 duift  and  converfation,  the  entertainment  he  met  with,  and  v. hat 
 pafled  relating  to  him  while  in  Podon  ;  as  he  was  conirantly  attcn.l- 
 ed,  during  his  continuance  there,  hy  one  of  my  cluldrcn,  in  order 
 t'O  his  afTifTancc  in  h-'s  illnefs. 
 
 C  2:  zT::-y2j. 
 
234  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  J.B.  1747. 
 
 among  the  Indians,  ^A'ith  a  charitable  intention  of  contributing 
 fomething  of  their  fubflance  to  promote  the  excellent  defign 
 of  the  advancement  of  the  interefts  of  Chriftianity  among  the 
 Indians;  and  undcrftanding  that  there  was  a  want  of  Bibles 
 for  the  fchool,  three  dozen  of  Bibles  were  immediately  pro- 
 cured, and  14 /.  in  bills  (of  the  old  tenor)  given  over  and  a- 
 bove,  be  fides  more  large  benefaftions  made  afterwards,  which 
 I  fhall  have  occafion  to  mention  in  their  proper  place. 
 
 ]\]r  Brainerd's  relloration  from  his  extremely  low  /late  in 
 Boflon,  {^  as  to  go  abroad  again  and  to  travel,  was  very  un- 
 cxpeftcd  to  him  and  his  friends.  My  daughter  who  was  v;ith 
 him,  writes  thus  concerning  him,  in  a  letter   dated   June  23. 
 
 *'  On  Thurfday,  he   was   very   ill  with  a  violent  fever, 
 
 "  and  extreme  pain  in  his  head  and  breaft,  and,  at  turns,  de- 
 *•'  lirious.  So  he  remained  till  Saturday  evening,  when  he 
 *'  feemed  to  be  in  the  agonies  of  death  :  the  family  was  up  with 
 '*  him  till  one  or  two  o'clock,  expecfling  every  hour  would  be  his 
 *'  lalf.  On  Sabbath-day  he  was  a  little  revived,  his  head  was 
 "  better,  but  very  full  of  pain,  and  exceeding  fore  at  his 
 "  breaft,  much  put  to  it  for  breath,  i:,c.  Yefterday  he  was 
 "  better  upon  all  accounts.     Laft:   night  he    flept  but   little. 
 
 "  This  morning  he  is  much  worfe- Dr  Pynchon  fays,  he 
 
 "  has  no  hopes  of  his  life  ;  nor  does  he  think  it  likely  he  will 
 *'  ever  come  out  of  the  chamber ;  though  he  fays,  he  may 
 *^  be  able  to  come  to  Northampton. '' 
 
 In  another  letter  dated  June  29.  Ihe  fays  as  follows.  "Mr 
 *'  Brainerd  has  not  fo  much  pain  nor  fever,  fmce  I  lafi 
 ^'  wrote,  as  before  :  yet  he  is  extremely  weak  and  low,  and 
 "  very  faint,  expelling  every  day  will  be  his  laft.  He  fays, 
 "  It  is  impoffible  for  him  to  live,  for  want  of  life.  He 
 '*  has  hardly  vigour  enough  to  draw  his  breath.  I  went  this 
 "  morning  into  to\vn,  and  when  I  came  home,  Mr  Brom- 
 *'  field  fuid,  he  never  expelled  I  fnould  fee  him  alive ;  for  he 
 **'  lay  two  hours,  as  they  thought,  dying ;  one  could  fcarcely 
 *'  tell,  whether  he  was  alive,  or  not;  he  was  not  able  to 
 '•  fpcak,  for  fome  time :  butnow'is  much  as  he  was  before.  The 
 "  douior  thinks,  he  will  drop  away  in  fuch  a  turn.  Mr 
 "  Brainerd  fays,  he  never  felt  any  thing  fo  much  like  dijfolu- 
 "  tion,  as  what  he  felt  to-day ;  and  fays,  he  never  had  any 
 *•'  conception  of  its  being  poiTible  for  any  creature  to  be  alive, 
 
 '•  and  yet  fo  weak  as  he  is  from  day  to  day. Dr  Pynchon 
 
 *^  fays,  he  iliould  not  be  fiirprifcd,  if  he  fhould  fo  recover 
 *'  as  to  live  half  a  year;  nor  would  it  furprife  him,  if  he 
 "  ihouid  die  in  half  a  day.  Since  I  began  to  write,  he  is 
 *'  not  fj  v.cil,  having  had   £    faint   tui n   again :  yet  patiert 
 
 "  and 
 
/€/. 30.        Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  RD.  235 
 
 "  and  refjgned,    having  no   diflrefiing   fears,    but  the   con- 
 "  nary." 
 
 His  phyfician,  the  honourable  jofeph  Pynchon,  Efq;  when 
 he  vifited  him  in  his  extreme  ilhicfs  in  BoOon,  attributed  bis 
 iinking  (o  fuddenly  into  a  ftate  fo  extremely  low,  and  nigh 
 unto  death,  to  the  breaking  of  ulcers,  that  had  been  long 
 gathering  in  his  lungs,  (as  Mr  Braineid  himfelf  intimates  in  a 
 forementioned  paffage  in  his  diary),  and  there  difcharging  and 
 difTufing  their  purulent  matter  ;  which,  while  nature  was 
 labouring  and  flruggling  to  throw  off,  (that  could  be  done  no 
 otherwife,  than  by  a  gradual  ftraining  of  it  through  the  fmall 
 veflels  of  thofe  vital  partb),  this  occaiioned  an  high  fever, 
 and  violent  coughing,  and  threw  the  whole  frame  of  nature 
 into  the  utmoft  diforder,  and  brought  it  near  to  a  diflokition. 
 But  fuppofed,  if  the  flrength  of  nature  held  till  the  lungs  had 
 this  way  gradually  cleared  themfelves  of  this  putrid  matter,  he 
 might  revive,  and  continue  better,  till  new  ulcers  gathered 
 and  broke ;  but  then  would  furcly  fink  again  ;  and  that  there 
 was  no  hope  of  his  recovery  ;  but  (as  he  expreffed  himfelf  to 
 one  of  my  neighbours,  who  at  that  time  faw  him  in  Boflon) 
 he  was  as  certainly  a  dead  man,  as  if  he  was  fhot  through  the 
 heart. 
 
 But  fo  it  was  ordered  in  divine  providence,  that  the  flrength 
 of  nature  held  out  through  this  great  conflidl,  fo  as  juft  to 
 efcape  the  grave  at  that  turn  ;  and  then  he  revived,  to  the 
 aftonifhment  of  all  that  knew  his  cafe. 
 
 After  he  began  to  revive,  he  was  vlfited  by  his  youngeft 
 brother,  Mr  ifrael  Brainerd,  a  ftudent  at  Yale-college;  who 
 having  heard  of  his  extreme  illnefs,  went  from  thence  to  Bo- 
 fton,  in  order  to  fee  him,  if  he  might  iiud  him  alive,  which 
 he  but  little  expcfted. 
 
 This  vifit  was  attended  with  a  mixture  of  joy  and  forrow 
 to  Mr  Brainerd.  He  greatly  rejoiced  to  fee  his  brother,  cfpe- 
 cially  becaufe  he  had  defired  an  opportunity  of  feme  religious 
 converfation  with  him  before  he  died.  But  this  meeting  was 
 attended  with  forrow,  as  his  brother  brought  to  hira  the 
 forrowful  tidings  of  his  fifter  Spencer's  death  at  Haddam  ; 
 a  fifter,  between  whom  and  him  had  long  fub lifted  a  peculiarly 
 dear  aiFcftion,  and  much  intimacy  in  fpirituai  matters,  and 
 whofe  houfe  he  ufed  to  make  his  home,  when  he  went  to 
 Haddam*  his  native  place.  He  bad  heard  nothing  of  her 
 ficknefs  till  this  report  of  her  death.  But  he  had  thefe 
 comforts,  together  with  the  tidings,  viz.  a  confidence  of 
 her  being  gone  to  heaven,  and  an  expeflaticn  of  his  foon 
 meeting  her  there. — His  brother  continued  with   him   till  he 
 
 G  <T  2  left 
 
23^  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  J.D.  17^7, 
 
 left  the  town,  and  came  with  him  from  thence  to  North* 
 ampton. 
 
 Concerning  the  lafl:  Sabbath  Mr  Braincrd  fpcnt  in  Boftonj 
 he  writes  in  his  diaiy  as  follows.] 
 
 Lord's  day,  July  19.  I  was  juft  able  to  attend  public  wor* 
 fliip,  being  carried  to  the  houfe  of  God  in  a  chaifr.  Heard 
 Dr  Sewall  preach,  in  the  forenoon :  partook  of  the  Lord's 
 fupper  at  this  time.  In  this  facrament,  I  favv  aftoniHiing  di- 
 vine ivifdom  difplayed;  fuch  wifdom  as  I  faw  required  Lhe 
 tongues  of  angels  and  glorified  faints  to  celebrate:  it  feem<;d 
 t)  me,  I  never  Ihould  do  any  thing  at  adoring  the  infinite 
 "w'fdom  of  God  difcovered  in  the  contrivance  of  man's  redcn»p- 
 tion,  until  I  arrived  at  a  world  of  pei  fefti  >n ;  yet  I  cuuld  not 
 help  driving  to  "call  upon  my  f)ul,  and  all  within  me,  tobkfs 
 
 **  the  name  of  God.'' In  the  afternoon,  heard  Kx  Piince 
 
 preach. — I  faw  more  of  Gv>d  in  the  'iv'.fdom  difcovered  in  the 
 plan  of  man's  redemption,  than  I  faw  ot  any  other  oi  his  per- 
 fections, tjirough  the  whole  day. 
 
 [He  left  Bofton  the  next  day.  But  before  he  came  away, 
 he  had  occafion  to  bear  a  very  full,  plain,  and  open  tejhimvy 
 againft  that  opinion,  that  the  t£tnce  of  faving  faith  lies-  in 
 bdlev'mg  that  Chrift  died  for  me  in  paiticidar ;  and  that  this 
 is  the  frft  aft  of  faith  in  a  true  believer's  clofmg  with  Chriff. 
 He  did  it  in  a  long  conference  he  had  with  a  gentleman,  that 
 has  very  pubhckly  and  ftrenuoully  appeared  to  defend  that 
 tenet.  He  had  this  difcourfe  with  him  in  the  prefence  of  a 
 number  of  confiderable  p&rfons,  who  came  to  vifit  Mr  Brain- 
 crd before  he  left  the  town,  and  to  take  their  leave  of  him. 
 In  which  debate,  he  made  this  plain  declaration,  (at  the  fame 
 time  confirming  what  he  faid  by  many  arguments),  That 
 the  e(fence  of  faving/^// A  was  wholly  left  out  of  that  deftiiticn 
 of  laving  faith  which  that  gentleman  has  publiflied  ;  and  that 
 rhe  faith  which  he  had  dtfned,  had  nothing  of  God  in  it,  no- 
 tliing  above  nature,  nor  indeed  above  the  power  of  the  devils ; 
 'in6.  that  all  fuch  a.^  had  this  faith,  and  had  no  better,  though 
 they  might  have  this  to  never  fo  high  a  degree,  would  furely 
 pcrifh.  And  he  declared  alfo,  that  he  never  had  greater  a(iU' 
 riince  of  the  fa  Ifeftejs  oi  the  principles  of  thofe  that  maintain- 
 cdfuch  a  faith,  and  of  their  dangerous  and  deftruftive  ten- 
 dency, or  a  more  affcfting  fcnfe  of  the  great  delufion  and 
 iinfery  of  thofe  that  depended  on  getting  to  heaven  by  fuch  a 
 f.;irh,  (while  they  had  fto  better),  than  he  lacely  had  when  he 
 '•v/t.i  fwnpofed  to  be  at  the   point  to  die,  and  expected  every 
 
 niinutfc 
 
St.  30.      Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  237 
 
 minute  to  pafs  into  eternity. — Mr  Brainerd's  difcourfe  at  thii 
 t\iv.t,  and  the  forceable  rtilbnings,  by  which  he  confirmed 
 what  he  afieited,  appeared  to  be  greatl)  to  the  fatisfaOion  of 
 thofe  preient;  as  leveral  of  them  tjok  occafion  exprefsly  to 
 manifelt  to  him,  before  they  took  leave  of  him. 
 
 When  this  converfation  was  ended,  having  bid  an  afFe<^ion- 
 ate  farewell  to  his  friends,  he  let  out  in  the  cod  of  the  af- 
 ternoon, on  his  jouiney  to  Northampton,  attended  by  his 
 br  )iher,  and  my  daughter  that  went  with  him  to  Boftcn ;  and 
 would  have  been  acconpanied  out  of  the  town  by  a  number 
 of  gentlemen,  befides  that  honourable  perfon  who  gave  him 
 his  company  for  fume  miles  on  that  occafion,  as  a  ti.ftimony 
 of  their  elfeem  and  refpc£t,  had  not  his  averfion  to  any  thing 
 of  pomp  and  Ihew  prevented  it.J 
 
 Saturday,  July  25.  I  arrived  here  at  Northam.pton ;  having 
 fet  out  from  Bofton  on  Monday,  about  four  o'cL)ck  P.  M 
 In  thib  journey,  I  rode  about  fixteen  miles  a  day,  one  day' 
 with  another.  Was  fometimes  extremely  tired  and  faint  on 
 the  road,  {o  that  it  fcemed  im.polTible  for  me  to  proceed  any 
 further :  at  other  times  I  v/as  confiderably  better,  and  felt 
 fome  freedom  both  of  body  and  mind. 
 
 Lord's  day,  July  26.  This  day,  1  faw  clearly,  that  I  ftiould 
 never  be  happy;  yea,  that  God  himfelf  could  not  make  me 
 happy  unlefb  1  could  be  in  a  capacity  to  "  pleafe  and  glorify 
 "  him  for  ever :"  talce  away  this,  and  admit  me  into  all  the 
 fine  heavens  that  can  be  conceived  of  by  men  or  angels,  and 
 I  iliould  fiill  be  miferahle  for  ever. 
 
 [Though  he  had  fo  far  revived,  as  to  be  able  to  travel  thus 
 far,  yet  he  manifefled  no  ejcpedtation  of  recovery  :  he  fup- 
 pofed,  as  his  phyficlan  did,  that  his  being  brought  fo  near  to 
 death  at  Bofion,  was  owing  to  the  breaking  ol  ulcers  in  his 
 lungs :  he  told  me  that  he  had  had  feveral  luch  ill  turns  be- 
 fore, only  not  to  fo  high  a  degree,  but  as  he  fuppofed,  ow- 
 ing to  the  fame  caufc,  viz.  the  breaking  of  ulcers ;  and  that 
 he  was  brought  lower  and  lover  every  time ;  and  it  appeared 
 to  him,  that"  in  his  laft  fickncfb  (in  Bofion)  he  was  brought  as 
 low  as  it  v. as  pofTible,  and  yet  live;  and  that  he  had  not  the 
 leaft  expectation  of  furviving  the  next  return  of  this  breaking 
 of  ulcers:  but  ftill  appeared  perfectly  calm  in  the  profpefl  of 
 death. 
 
 On  AVecnefday  morning,  the  week  after  he  came  to  North- 
 Smpron,  he  took  leave  of  his  brother  Ifrael,  and  never  cxpcft- 
 
 ing 
 
238  T  H  IE     L  T  F  E     O  F  A.D.  1747. 
 
 ing  to  fee  him  again  in  this  world ;  he  now  fetting  out  from 
 hence  on  his  journey  to  New-Haven. 
 
 When  Mr  Brainerd  came  hither,  he  had  fo  much  ftrength 
 as  to  be  able,  from  day  to  day,  to  ride  out  two  or  three  miles, 
 and  to  return ;  and  fometimes  to  pray  in  the  family ;  but 
 from  this  time  he  gradually,  but  fenfibly,  decayed,  and  be- 
 came weaker  and  weaker. 
 
 While  he  was  here,  his  converfation  from  firft  to  laft  was 
 much  on  the  fame  fubjefts  as  it  had  been  when  in  Bofton:  he 
 was  much  in  fpeaking  of  the  nature  of  true  religion  of  heart 
 and  pra£tice,  as  diftinguiHied  from  its  various  counterfeits ^ 
 expreffing  his  great  concern,  that  the  latter  did  fo  much  pre- 
 vail in  many  places.  He  often  manifcfted  his  great  abhor- 
 rence of  all  iuch  do^rines  and  principles  in  religion,  as  in  any 
 wife  favoured  of,  and  had  any  (though  but  a  remote)  tenden- 
 cy to  Antinomianifm  ;  of  all  fuch  notions,  as  feemed  to  dimi- 
 3iilli  the  neceiiity  of  holinefs  of  life,  or  to  abate  mens  re- 
 gard to  the  commands  of  God,  and  a  ftrift,  diligent,  and  uni- 
 verfal  practice  of  virtue  and  piety,  under  a  pretence  of  depre- 
 ciating our  works,  and  magnifying  God's  free  grace.  He 
 fpake  often,  with  much  deteftacion,  of  fuch  experiences  and 
 pretended  d'fcoveries  and  joys,  as  have  nothing  of  the  na- 
 ture oifan^ificat ion  in  them,  and  do  not  tend  to  ftridlnefs, 
 tendcrncfs,  and  diligence  in  religion,  and  meeknefs  and  bene- 
 volence towards  mankind,  and  an  humble  behaviour:  and  he 
 alfo  declared,  thit  he  looked  on  fuch  pretended  humility  as 
 worthy  of  no  regard,  that  was  not  manifefted  by  modefty  of 
 €onducl  and  converfation.  He  fpake  often,  with  abhorrence, 
 of  the  fpirit  and  pradlice  that  appears  among  the  greater  part 
 of  feparat'fis  at  this  day  in  the  land,  particularly,  thofe  in 
 the  Eaflern  parts  of  Conne(5licut ;  in  their  condemning  and  fe- 
 parating  from  the  ftanding  miniftry  and  churches,  their  cr)'- 
 ing  down  learning  and  a  learned  miniflry,  their  notion  of  an 
 hmnediate  call  to  the  work  of  the  miniftry,  and  the  forward- 
 nefs  of  laymen  to  fet  up  themfelves  as  public  teachers.  He 
 had  been  much  con^  erHmt  in  the  Eaflern  part  of  Connecticut, 
 (his  native  place  being  near  to  it),  when  the  fame  principles, 
 notion,  and  fpirit  began  to  operate,  which  have  fmce  pre- 
 vailed to  a  greater  height ;  and  had  acquaintance  w  ith  fome 
 of  thofe  perfons  who  are  become  heads  and  leaders  of  the  fe- 
 parat'fs ;  he  bad  alfo  been  converfant  with  perfons  of  the 
 Jiimc  way  elfewhere:  and  I  heard  him  fay,  once  and  again,  he 
 knew  by  his  acquaintance  with  this  fort  of  people,  that  what 
 was  chiefly  and  moft  generally  in  repute  among  them  as  the 
 po%ver  of  godUmfs,  was  an  entirely  different  thing  from  that 
 
 true 
 
JLt.^o.      Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  23^ 
 
 true  vital  piety  recommended  in  the  fcriptures,  and  had  no- 
 thing In  it  of  that  nature.  He  manifefted  a  great  diflike  of  a 
 difpjfition  in  perfons  to  much  noife  and /how  in  religion,  and 
 alFecling  to  be  abundant  in  proclaiming  and  publishing  their 
 own  experiences:  though  at  the  fame  time  he  did  not  con- 
 demn, but  approved  of  Chriftians  fpeaking  of  their  own  ex- 
 periences on  fome  occafions,  and  to  fome  perfons,  with  due 
 modefty  and  difcretion.  He  himfelf  fometimes,  while  at  my 
 houfc,  fpake  of  his  own  experiences  :  but  it  was  always  with 
 apparent  referve,  and  in  the  exercife  of  care  and  judgment 
 with  refpeft  to  occafions,  perfons,  and  circumftances.  He 
 mentioned  fome  remarkable  things  of  his  own  religious  expe- 
 rience to  two  young  gentlemen,  candidates  for  the  miniftry^ 
 who  watched  with  him  (each  at  a  different  time)  when  he 
 ■was  very  low,  and  not  far  from  his  end ;  but  he  deiircd  both 
 of  them  not  to  fpeak  of  what  he  had  told  them  till  after  kis 
 death. 
 
 The  things  which  were  the  fubject  of  that  debate  I  men- 
 tioned before,  that  he  had  with  a  certain  gentleman,  the  day 
 he  left  Bofton,  feemed  to  lie  with  much  weight  on  his  mind 
 after  he  came  hither ;  and  he  began  to  write  a  letter  to  that 
 gentleman,  exprefling  his  fentiments  concerning  the  danger- 
 ous tendency  of  fome  of  the  tenets  he  had  cxpreffed  in  con- 
 verfation,  and  in  the  writings  he  had  publiihed ;  with  the  con- 
 fiderations  by  which  the  exceeding  hurtful  nature  of  thofc  no- 
 tions is  evident ;  but  he  had  not  ftrcngth  to  finifli  his  letter. 
 
 x'lfter  he  came  hither,  as  long  as  he  lived,  he  was  much  in 
 fpeaking  of  that  future  profperity  of  Zion  that  is  fo  often 
 foretold  and  prjmifed  in  the  fcripture  :  it  was  a  theme  he  de- 
 lighted to  dwell  upon  •  and  his  mind  feemed  to  be  carried  forth 
 with  earned  concern  about  it,  and  intenfe  defires,  that  reli- 
 gion might  fpcedily  and  abundantly  revive  and  flourifh ; 
 though  he  had  not  the  leaft  expeftation  of  recovery ;  yea,  the 
 nearer  death  advanced,  and  the  more  the  fymptoms  of  its  ap- 
 proach incrcafed,  ftill  the  more  did  his  mind  feem  to  be  taken 
 up  with  this  fubjeft.  He  told  me,  when  near  his  end,  that 
 "  he  never  in  all  his  life  had  his  mind  fo  led  forth  in  dedres 
 '*  and  earneft  prayers  for  the  flourifhing  of  Chr'iffs  hingd'jm 
 "  on  earth,  as  fince  he  was  brought  fo  exceeding  low  at  Ec- 
 "  Hon.''  He  feemed  much  to  wonder,  that  there  appeared 
 no  more  of  a  difpofition  in  miniilers  and  people  to  pray  for 
 the  fiourifhing  of  religion  throup,h  the  world ;  chat  fo  little  a 
 part  of  their  prayers  v/as  generally  taken  up  about  it,  in  their 
 families,  and  elfewhere  ;  and  particularly,  he  feveral  times 
 exprefled  his  wonder,  that  there  appeared  no  more  forward- 
 
 nef? 
 
»40  T  H  E     L  I  f  E     O  F  A.D.  1747, 
 
 nefs  to  comply  Vith  the  propofal  lately  made,  in  a  memorial 
 from  a  number  of  minifters  in  Scotland,  and  fent  over  into  A- 
 inerica,  for  un' ted  extraordinary  prayer,  among  Ch rift's  mi« 
 n'fters  and  people,  for  the  comng  of  Chr'ifi's  kingdom:  and 
 he  fent  it  as  his  dying  advice  tj  his  own  congregation,  that 
 they  fhould  pra61:ife  agreeably  to  that  propofal '. 
 
 Though  he  was  conftantly  exceeding  weak,  yet  there  ap- 
 peared in  him  a  continual  care  well  to  improve  time,  and  fill 
 it  up  with  fomething  that  might  be  profitable,  and  in  fome  re- 
 fpeh  for  the  glory  of  God  or  the  good  of  men ;  either  pre  fit- 
 able  converfation,  or  writing  letters  to  abfent  friends,  or 
 n  Jting  fomething  in  his  diary,  or  looking  over  his  former 
 wiitin'^s,  correfting  them,  and  preparing  them  to  be  left  in 
 the  hands  of  others  at  his  death,  or  giving  fome  direclions 
 concerning  a  future  cjndu£ling  and  management  of  his  people, 
 or  employment  in  fecrct  devotions.  He  feemed  never  to  be 
 eafy,  however  ill,  if  he  was  not  doing  fomething  for  God, 
 or  in  his  fervice. 
 
 After  he  came  hither,  he  wrote  a  preface  to  a  diary  of  the 
 famous  J\lr  Shepard's,  (in  thofe  papers  before  mentioned, 
 lately  found),  having  been  much  urged  to  it  by  thofe  gentle- 
 men in  Boflon  who  had  the  care  of  the  publication :  which 
 diary,  with  his  preface,  has  fince  been  publidied  f . 
 
 In  his  diary  for  Lord's  day,  Augufl  9.  he  fpeaks  of  long- 
 ing defires  after  it<3/^,  through  a  fenfe  of  the  excellency  of 
 z^iLtc  of  perfenion.  , 
 
 In  his  diary  for  Lord's  day,  Augufl:  16.  he  fpeaks  of  his 
 having  fo  much  refrefiiment  of foid  in  the  houfe  of  God,  that 
 it  feemed  alfo  to  refrcfh  his  kody.  And  this  is  not  only  no- 
 ted in  his  diary,  but  was  very  obfervable  to  others ;  it  was 
 very  apparent,  not  only,  that  his  mind  was  exhilarated  with 
 inward  confolation,  but  alfo  that  his  animal  fpirits  and  bodily 
 i!trength  feemed  to  be  remarkably  reftored,  as  though  he  had 
 
 forgot  his  illnefs. But  this  was  the  lafl  time  that  ever  he 
 
 attended  public  worlhio  on  the  Sabbath. 
 
 *  His  congregation,  fince  this,  have  with  gieat  cheerfulnefs 
 and  unanimity  fallen  in  with  this  advice,  and  have  praJlifed  agreeably 
 to  the  propofal  tiom  Scotland  ;  and  have  at  times  appeared  with 
 uncommon  engagednefs  and  fervency  of  fpirit  in  their  meetings  and 
 united  devotions,  purfuant  to  that  propofal.  Alfo  the  preHayterics 
 of  New- York,  and  Nf^w  BrunAvick,  fince  this,  have  with  one  con- 
 fent,  fallen  in  with  ihe  propofal,  as  likewife  fome  others  of  God's 
 people  in  thofe   parts 
 
 t  A  pr.rt  of  this  preTaff  is  inferted  in  the  appendix  to  this  hiflory. 
 
 On 
 
jB/.  ^.       Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  >      241 
 
 On  TucfJay  morning  that  week  (I  being  abfcnt  on  a  jour- 
 ney) he  prayed  with  my  family;  but  not  without  much  dlf- 
 ficuiry,  f^r  w^nt  of  bodily  ftrength ;  and  this  was  the  lafl 
 family-prayer  that  ever  he  made. 
 
 He  had  been  wont,  till  niw,  frequently  to  ride  out,  two 
 or  three  miles:  but  this  week,  on. Thuilday,  was  the  lafl  tin-.c 
 he  ever  did  {0.1 
 
 Lord's  day,  Augufl  23.  Thi?  morning,  I  was  conHdcrabty 
 refre filed  with  the  thou^'ir,  yea,  the  hope  and  expectation  of 
 the  enlargement  of  Chr'Ji's  kinr'dnm  ;  and  I  could  not  but  hope, 
 the  ti.ne  wa:.  at  hand,  when  Babylon  the  great  would /«//, 
 and  r  fe  no  more  •  this  led  me  to  fome  fpiritual  meditations, 
 that  v-vere  very  refrelliing  t\)  me.  I  was  unable  to  attend  pub- 
 lic wirlhip,  either  part  of  the  day  ;  but  God  was  pleafcd  to 
 aff  )rd  me  fi^ednefs  and  fatisfaftion  in  divine  thoughts.  No- 
 tping  {')  rerrefhes  my  foul,  as  when  T  can  ^'j  to  God,  yes,  to 
 God  my  exceed' ng  ioy.  Wl"en  he  is  fo,  fenfibly,  to.  my  foul. 
 Oh  how  unfp'^akabK  deligluful  is  this  ! 
 
 In  the  week  paft,  I  had  divers  turns  of  inward  refrcfhing; 
 though  my  body  wa.->  inexprefTihly  weak,  followed  continually 
 with  agues  and  fevers.  Somefim  s  my  foul  centred  in  God, 
 as  my  only  port'^nn;  and  I  felt  that  I  Should  be  for  ever  un- 
 happy, \i  he  did  not  rc'rcn:  I  faw  the  fwectnefs  and  hap- 
 pinefs  of  being  h's  fubje6V,  at  his  difpofal.  This  made  all 
 ray  difficulties  quickly  vanifh. 
 
 From  this  Lord's  day,  viz.  AuguO:  23-  I  was  troubled  very 
 much  with  vapoury  dif^rder?,  and  could  neither  write  nor 
 read,  and  could  fcarcely  live ;  although  through  mercy,  was 
 not  fo  much  oppreffed  with  heavy  melancholy  and  glocminefs, 
 as  at  many  other  times. 
 
 [Till  this  week  he  had  been  wont  to  lodge  in  a  roc:n  above 
 ftairs ;  but  he  now  grew  fo  weak,  that  he  was  no  longer  able 
 to  go  up  flairs  and  down.  Friday,  AuguC  28.  v.as  the  laft 
 time  he  ever  went  above  flairs,  henceforward  he  betook  him- 
 felf  to  a  lower  room. 
 
 On  Wednefday,  September  2.  being  the  day  of  or,r  public 
 lefture,  he  fcemed  to  be  refredied  with  feeing  the  neighbour- 
 ing rainifters  that  came  hither  to  the  lecSlure,  nnd  cxprcffed  a 
 great  defirc  once  more  to  go  to  the  houfe  of  God  on  that  dr.y  : 
 and  accordingly  rode  to  the  meeting,  and  attended  divine  icr- 
 vlce,  while  the  Reverend  Mr  Woodbridgc  of  Hftlleld  preach- 
 ed. He  figaificd  that  he  fuppofed  it  to  be  the  laft  time  that 
 ever  he  fhould  attend  the  public  wor/liip  ;  as  it  proved.     And 
 
 H  h  indeed 
 
^42  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  yi.D.  1747. 
 
 indeed  it  was  the  laft  tim^  that  ever  he  went  out  at  our  gate 
 alive. 
 
 On  the  Saturday-evening  next  following,  he  was  unexpeft- 
 cdly  vifited  by  his  brother  Mr  John  Brainerd,  who  came  to 
 lee  him  From  New-Jerfey.  He  was  inuch  refredied  by  this 
 uncxpeifted  vifit,  this  brother  being  peculiarly  dear  to  him  j 
 and  he  Teemed  to  rejoice  in  a  devout  and  fclemn  inanner,  to 
 fee  him,  and  to  hear  the  comfortable  tidings  he  brought  con- 
 cerning the  Hate  of  his  dear  congregation  of  Chriflian  Indians : 
 and  a  circumftance  of  this  vifit,  that  he  was  exceeding  glad  of, 
 was,  that  his  brother  brought  him  fome  of  his  private  wri- 
 tings from  iNew-Jerfey,  and  particularly  his  diary  that  he  had 
 kept  for  many  years  pafl.J 
 
 Lord's  day,  September  6.  I  began  to  read  fome  of  my  pri- 
 vate writings,  which  my  brother  brought  me;  and  was  con- 
 fidcrably  refreihed  v;ith  what  I  met  v/ith   in  them. 
 
 Monday,  September  7.  I  proceeded  further  in  reading  my 
 old  private  writings,  and  found  they  had  the  fame  elfea:  upon 
 nie  as  before  :  I  could  not  but  rejoice  ant!  blefs  God  for  what 
 palled  long  ago,  which  without  writing  had  been  entirely  loft. 
 
 This  evening,  when  I  was  in  great  diftrefs  of  body,  my 
 foul  longed  that  God  ihould  be  glorified  :  I  faw  there  was  no 
 heaven  but  this.  I  could  not  but  fpeak  to  the  byftanders 
 then  of  the  only  happinefs,  viz.  pleajlng  God.  Oh  that  I 
 could. for  ever  live  to  God  I  The  day,  I  truft,  is  at  hand,  the 
 perfect  day  :   Oh,  the  day  of  deliverance  from  all  fin  ! 
 
 Lord's  day,  September  13.  I  was  much  refreflied  and  en- 
 gaged in  meditation  and  writing,  and  found  a  heart  to  aft 
 for  God.  My  fpiiits  were  refreflied,  and  my  foul  delighted 
 to  do  fomething  for  God. 
 
 [On  the  evening  following  that  Lord's  dr.y,  his  feet  began 
 to  appear  fenfibly  Iwelled ;  which  th^^nc£ forward  fwcllcd  more 
 and  more      A  fyraptom  of  his  diflblurion  coming  on. 
 
 The  next  day,  his  brother  John  left  him,  being  obliged  to 
 return  to  New-Jcrfey  on  fome  bufuicfs  of  great  importance 
 a4nd  neceflity;  intending  to  return  a^ain  with  all  polfiblc  fpeed, 
 hoping  to  fee  his  brother  yet  once  more  in  the  land  ot  the 
 living. 
 
 Mr  Brainerd  having  now  with  much  deliberation  confidered 
 of  the  important  affau-  fore  mentioned,  left  with  him  by  the 
 honourable  conimiflvoHers  in  Bofton,  of  the  corporation  in 
 London  for  the  propagation  of  the  gofpel  in  New-England 
 and  pr.rt3  adjaccn':,  viz.  the  Exing  upon  and  reeommcnding 
 
 two 
 
Mt.^o.       Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  243 
 
 two  perfons  proper  to  be  employed  as  miflionaries  to  the  Six 
 Nations,  he  about  this  time  wrote  a  letter,  recommendirg 
 two  youHg  gentlemen  of  his  acquaintance  tothofe  commifuor- 
 ners,  viz.  Mr  Elihu  Spencer  of  E?.fl;-Haddara,  and  JNIr  jcb 
 Strong  of  Northampton.  The  commiffioners  on  the  receipt 
 of  this  letter,  cheerTully  and  unanimoufiy  agreed  to  accept  of 
 and  employ  the  perfons  he  had  recommended :  who  accorc- 
 ingly  have  fmce  waited  on  the  commiffioners  to  receive  their 
 inftruftions  ;  and  purfuant  to  their  inihuclions,  have  applied 
 themfelves  to  a  preparation  for  the  buhnefs  of  their  mifiion, 
 in  the  manner  to  which  they  direded  them  ;  and  one  of  them, 
 viz.  Mr  Spencer,  has  been  folemnly  ordained  to  that  work, 
 by  feveral  of  the  minifters  of  Bofton,  in  the  prefence  of  an  ec- 
 clefiaftical  council  convened  for  that  purpofe;  and  is  now 
 gone  forth  to  the  nation  of  the  Oncidaes,  about  one  hundred 
 and  feventy  miles  beyond  Albany. 
 
 He  alfo  this  week,  viz.  on  Wednefday,  September  16. 
 wrote  a  letter  to  a  particular  gentleman  in  Bofton  (one  of 
 thofe  charitable  perfons  forementioned,  who  appeared  fo  for- 
 ward to  contribute  of  their  flibftance  for  the  promoting  Chri- 
 ftianity  among  the  Indians)  relating  to  the  growth  of  the 
 Indian  fchool,  and  the  need  of  another  fchoolmafler,  or  fomx 
 perfon  to  affift  the  fchoolmafler  in  inflruiSting  the  Indian 
 children.  Thefe  gentlemen,  on  the  receipt  of  this  letter, 
 had  a  meeting,  and  agreed  with  great  cheerfulnefs  to  give 
 L.  200  (in  bills  of  the  old  tenor)  for  the  fupport  of  ano- 
 ther fchoolmafler ;  and  defired  the  reverend  Mr  PcmbertS'n 
 of  New- York,  (who  was  then  at  Bofton,  and  was  alfo,  at 
 their  defire,  prelent  at  their  meeting),  as  foon  as  poffible  to 
 procure  a  fuitable  perfon  for  that  fervice  ;  and  alfo  agreed  to 
 allow  L.  75  to  defray  fome  fpecial  charges  that  were 
 requifite  to  encouiage  the  mifFion  to  the  Six  Nation?,  (befides 
 the  falary  allowed  by  the  commiflioners),  which  was  alfo  done 
 on  fom.c  intimations  given  by  Mr  Brainerd. 
 
 Mr  Brainerd  fpent  himfelf  much  in  writing  thofe  letters, 
 being  exceeding  weak  :  but  it  feem.ed  to  be  much  to  his  fatif- 
 faftion,  that  he  had  been  enabled  to  do  it ;  hoping  that  it  was 
 ibmething  done  for  God,  and  which  might  be  for  the  advance- 
 ment of  ChrifFs  kingdom  and  gl  ')ry.  in  v^^riting  the  lafl:  of 
 thefe  letters,  he  v.'a3  obliged  to  ufe  the  hand  of  another,  not 
 being  able  to  write  him.felf. 
 
 On  the  Thurfday  of  this  week  (September  1 7.)  V\'as  the  lafl 
 time  that  ever  he  went  out  of  his  lodging-room.  That 
 day,  he  was  again  vifited  by  his  brother  Ifracl,  who  continued 
 v/ith  him  theiiceforv/ard  till  his  death.     On  that  evening,  he 
 
 H  h  2       '  was 
 
244  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  AD.  1747, 
 
 was  taken  with  fomething  of  a  d.arrhea;  w'Ich  he  looked 
 upon  as  an:>ther  fign  of  his  approaching  deaths  whereup  jn 
 he  exprtfTed  himfolf  thus;  "  Oh,  the  glorious  time  is  n  ;w 
 *^  coming!  I  have  lonajed  to  ferve  God  pcrfeftly  :  now  G.d 
 '^  will  gratify  thofe  delires !"  And  from  time  to  line,  at  tl:e 
 feveral  fieps  and  new  fympioms  of  the  fenfible  approach  of 
 his  diflblution,  he  was  {o  far  from  being  funk'^^r  da.iiped,  that 
 he  feemed  to  be  animated,  and  made  nure  cheerful;  a^  bei.ig 
 glad  at  the  appearances  of  death's  appr  niCi).  He  often  uitd 
 the  epithet,  glorious,  when  fp;aking  jf  the  day  of  hi.  dtath^ 
 calling;  it  that  glorious  day.  And  as  he  faw  his  dilTjlution 
 grajjally  approaching,  he  was  much  in  talking  about  it,  with 
 perfect  cilmnefs  fpeaking  ot  a  future  date;  and  alfo  fettling 
 all  his  affairs,  very  particularly  and  minutely  giving  direftions 
 concerning  what  he  would  have  done  in  one  reipe(^i  and  ano- 
 ther  after  he  was  dead.  And  the  nearer  death  approached, 
 the  more  defirous  he  feemed  to  be  of  it.  He  feveral  times 
 fpake  of  the  different  kinds  of  w/7//«£^7z^-  to  d-e  ;  and  fpoke 
 Oi-  it  as  an  ignoble  mean  kind  of  willingnefs  to  die,  to  be  will- 
 ing to  leave  the  body,  only  to  get  rid  of  pain  ;  or  to  go  to 
 heaven,  only  to  geif  honour  and  advancement  there.] 
 
 Saturday,  September  19.  Near  night,  -While  I  attempted 
 to  walk  a  little,  my  thoughts  turned  thus;  "  How  infinitely 
 "^  fweef  it  is,  to  love  God,  and  be  all  for  him !"  Upon  which 
 it  was  fuggefled  to  me,  "  You  are  not  an  angel,  not  lively 
 "  and  active."  To  which  my  whole  Ibul  immediately  re- 
 plied, "  I  as  fincerely  defire  to  love  and  glorify  God,  as  any 
 "  angel  in  heaven."  Upon  which  it  was  luggefled  again, 
 "  But  you  are  filthy,  not  fit  for  heaven."  Hereupon  in- 
 flantly  appeared  the  blelTed  robes  of  Chriffs  righteoufnefs, 
 which  I  could  not  but  exult  and  triumph  in ;  and  I  viewed 
 the  infinite  excellency  of  God,  and  my  foul  even  broke  with 
 I.)nginy.s,  that  God  fhould  be  glorifed.  I  thought  of  dignity 
 in  heaven ;  but  inflantly  the  thought  returned,  "  I  do  not  go 
 "  to  heaven  to  get  honour,  but  to  give  all  pofuble  glory  and 
 "  pr  tife."  Oh,  how  I  longed  that  God  ihould  be  glorified 
 on  eath  ^\{o\  Oh,  I  was  made,  for  eternity,  if  God  might  be 
 gl  ^nfied !  Bodily  pa'ns  1  cared  not  for ;  though  I  wab  then  in  ex- 
 tremity, I  never  felt  eafier  ;  Ifeltwliiing  to  glorify  Cod  inthzt 
 ftite  of  b  :>dily  diflrtffs,  as  long  as  he  pleafed  J  fliould  continue 
 in  It.  The  grave  appeared  really  fweet,  and  I  longed  to  lodge 
 my  weary  bines  in  it:  but  Oh,  that  Gcd  might  hs glor'fed/ 
 t..ih  was  the  burden  of  all  my  cry.  Oh,  I  knew,  I  fnould  be 
 at^he  as  an  angel,  in  heaven ;  and  that  I  ihould  be  firipped  of 
 
 my 
 
m.-p,      Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  245 
 
 my  flthy  garmtnts!  lb  that  there  was  no  cbjedlun. But; 
 
 Oh,  t )  love  and pra'fe  God  more,  to  pl£oft  him  for  ever!  this 
 my  foul  panted  after,  and  even  now  pantb  for  while  I  write. 
 Oh  that  Cod  might  be  gior-fed  ia  the  whole  earth  !  "  Lord, 
 *'  let  ihy  kingdom  come."  I  longed  fur  a  fpirit  oi  preaching 
 to  defcend  and  reft  un  min'JlerSy  that  they  might  addiefs  the 
 conlciences  of  men  with  clofenefs  and  power.  I  law,  God 
 **  had  the  refidue  of  the  Spirit;"  and  my  foul  longed  it  fhould 
 be  "  poured  from  on  high."  I  could  not  but  plead  with  God 
 for  my  dear  crnoregation,  that  he  would  prelerve  it,  and  not 
 futFer  h's great  name  to  lofc  its  glory  in  that  work  ;  my  foul 
 ftilllongiiig,  that  God  might  be ^/cr.-/ei. 
 
 [The  extraordinary  frame,  that  he  was  in,  that  evenings 
 C'uld  n^Jtbe  hid;  "  his  mouth  fpake  out  of  the  abundance  of 
 ^'  nis  heart,"  exprelTmg  in  a  very  aitefting  manner  much  the 
 fame  things  as  are  written  in  his  diary .-  and  among  very  many 
 other  extraordinary  expreffions,  which  he  then  uttered,  were 
 fuch  as  thefe ;  *'  My  heaven  is  to  pleafe  God,  and  glorify 
 *'  him,  and  to  give  all  to  him,  and  to  be  wholly  devoted  to 
 "  his  glory;  that  is  the  heaven  I  long  for;  that  is  my  r^- 
 **  lipion,  and  that  is  my  happinefs,  and  always  was  ever  fmcc 
 *'   I  fuppofe  I  had  any  true   religion ;  and   all   thofe  that  are 
 
 '^'  oi  that  religion  fhall  meet  me  in  heaven. I   do  not   go 
 
 "  to  heaven  to  be  advanced,  but  to  give  honour  to  God. 
 "  It  is  no  matter  where  I  (hall  be  ftationed  in  heaven,  whe- 
 "  ther  I  have  a  high  or  low  feat  there ;  but  to  love,  and 
 *'  pleafe,  and  glorify  God  is  all :  had  I  a  thoujand  fouls,  if 
 "  they  wepe  worth  any  thing,  I  would  give  them  all  to  God  ; 
 
 "  but  I  have  nothing   to  give,  when  all  is  done. It  is  im- 
 
 ^'  poiTible  for  any  rational  cieature  to  be  happy  without  acfl- 
 *'  ing  zWf'ir  God.-  God  himfelf  could  not  make  him   happy 
 
 *'  any   otlier  way. 1   long  to  be  in  heaven,  pra'-finp  and 
 
 "  ^/5ry_)':«o-  God  with   the   holy   angels :  all  my  defire  is  to 
 
 *'  glorify  God. My  heart  goes  out  to  the  burying-place  ;  it 
 
 "^'  feems  to  m.e  a  de fir  able  place  :  but  Oh  toglj.  fy  God !  that 
 
 "  is  it;  that  is  above  all. It  is  a  great  comfort  to  me,  to 
 
 "  think,  that  I  have  dime  a  little /or  God  in  the  world  :  Oh  ! 
 "'  it  is  but  a  very  fmail  matter;  yet  I  have  done  a  little ;  and 
 
 ^^  I  lament  it,  that  I  have  not  done  more  for  him. There 
 
 "  is  nothing  in  the  world  worth  living  for,  but  doing  goodf 
 ■'  iind  fiiiJJ}ing  God's  work,  doing  the  work  that  Chrift  did. 
 ''  1  fee  nothing  elfc  in  the  world,  that  can  yield  any  fatisfac- 
 '■'  tion,  belides   living    to   God,  plciijing    him,  and   doing    his 
 
 v.'.h'jie  iL'iil. Ivly   grcatcfl  ioy  -and  comfort  has  been,  to 
 
 "do 
 
0,4^  T  H  E    L  I  F  E    O  F  jf.  D,  1747. 
 
 '*  do  fomething  for  promoting  the  interejft  of  religion,  and 
 ^'  the  foula  of  particular  perfons :  and  now,  in  my  illners, 
 "  while  I  am  full  of  pain  and  diftrefs,  from  day  to  day,  all 
 "  the  comfort  I  have,  is  in  being  able  to  do  fome  little  char 
 '*  (or  fcnall  piece  of  woik)  for  God;  either  by  fomething  that 
 ^  I  fay,  or  by  writing,  or  fome  other  way." 
 
 He  intermingled  with  thefe  and  other  like  expreffions, 
 jnany  pathetical  coimfels  to  thofe  that  were  about  him ;  par- 
 ticularly to  my  children  and  fervants.  He  applied  himfelf  to 
 fome  of  my  younger  children  at  this  time ;  calling  them  to 
 him,  and  fpeaking  to  them  one  by  one ;  fetting  before  them, 
 in  a  very  plain  manner,  the  nature  and  effence  of  true  piety, 
 and  its  great  importance  and  neceflity ;  earncftly  warning 
 them  not  to  reft  in  any  thing  fhort  of  that  true  and  thorough 
 change  of  heart,  and  a  life  dovoted  to  God;  counfeiling  them 
 not  to  be  Hack  in  the  great  bufmefs  of  religion,  nor  in  the 
 leaft  to  delay  it ;  enfercing  his  counfels  with  this,  that  his 
 words  were  the  words  of  a  dy'wg  7nan :  faid  he,  "  I  fhall  die 
 '*  here,  and  here  I  ftall  be  buried,  and  here  you  will  fee  my 
 "^  grave,  and  do  you  remember  what  I  have  laid  to  you.  I 
 ■*•  am  going  into  eternity :  and  it  is  fweet  to  me  to  think  of 
 *•'  eternity ;  the  endleflnefs  of  it  makes  it  fweet :  but  Oh, 
 *'  what  fhall  I  fay  to  the  eternity  of  the  ivicked!  I  cannot 
 '*  mention  it,  nor  think  of  it;  the  thought  is  too  dreadful. 
 '^  When  you  fee  my  grave,  then  remember  what  I  faid  to  you 
 "^  while  I  was  alive;  then  think  with  jourfelf,  how  that  man 
 "  that  lies  in  that  grave,  counfelled  and  warned  me  to  pre- 
 **  pare  for  death." 
 
 His  body  feemed  to  be  marvelloufly  frrengthened,  through 
 the  inv/ard  vigour  and  refrefliment  of  his  mind ;  fo  that,  al- 
 though before  he  Avas  fo  weak  that  he  could  hardly  utter  a 
 Ic-ntence,  yet  now  he  continued  his  mofl  affeffing  and  profit- 
 able difcourfe  to  us  for  more  than  an  hour,  with  fcarce  any 
 •intermiffion ;  and  faid  of  it,  when  he  had  done,  "  it  was  the 
 ''  lafl  Icrmon  that  ever  he  fhould  preach." 
 
 This  extraordinary  frame  of  mind  continued  the  next  day ; 
 of  which  he  fays  in  his  d'.ary  as  follows.] 
 
 Lord's  da}',  September  20.  Was  ftill  in  a  fweet  and  com- 
 fortable fram.e :  and  was  again  melted  with  defires  that  God 
 might  he  glorifed,  and  with  longings  to  love  and  live  to  him. 
 Longed  for  the  influences  of  the  divine  Spirit  to  defcend  on 
 r,r.ivl}crs,  in  a  fpecial  manner.  And  Oh,  I  longed  to  be 
 \vhk  Gcd,  to  behold  his  glory,  and  to  bow  in  his  pretence  ! 
 
 [It 
 
Mt.2,0.      Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  447 
 
 [It  appears  by  what  is  noted  in  his  diary y  both  of  this  day^ 
 and  the  evening  preceding,  that  his  mind  at  this  time  was 
 much  iiiipre/Ted  with  a  fenfe  of  the  importance  of  the  work 
 of  the  minijiry,  and  the  need  of  the  grace  of  God,  and  his 
 fpeciai  fpiritual  afliftance  in  this  work :  and  it  alfo  appeared 
 in  what  he  exprelfed  in  converlation  ;  particularly  in  his  dif- 
 courfe  to  his  brother  Ilrael,  who  was  then  a  member  of  Yale- 
 college  at  New-Haven,  and  had  been  profecuting  his  lludies, 
 and  academical  exercifes  there,  to  that  end,  that  he  might  be  fit- 
 ted for  the  work  of  the  miniflry,  and  was  now  with  him  *, 
 He  now,  and  from  time  to  time,  in  this  his  dying  ftate,  recom- 
 mended to  his  brother,  a  life  of  feif  dcniel,  of  weanednefs 
 from  the  world,  and  devotednefs  to  God;,  and  an  earneft  en- 
 deavour to  obtain  much  of  the  grace  of  God's  Spirit,  and 
 God's  gracious  influences  on  his  heart ;  reprefenting  the  great 
 need  which  minifters  fland  in  of  them,  and  the  unfpeakable 
 benefit  of  them  from  his  own  experience.  Among  many  o- 
 ther  expreflions,  he  faid  thus ;  "  When  minift:ers  feel  thefe 
 *'  fpeciai  gracious  influences  on  their  hearts,  it  wonderfully 
 "  aflifts  them  to  come  at  the  confcicnces  of  men,  and  as  it 
 "  were  to  handle  them  with  hands ;  whereas,  without  them, 
 *'  whatever  reafon  and  oratory  we  make  ufe  of,  we  do  but 
 *'  make  ufc  of  flumps,  inftead  of  hands." 
 
 Monday,  September  11.  I  began  to  correft  a  little  volume 
 ©fray  private  writings:  God,  I  believe,  remarkably  helped  me 
 in  it ;  my  ftrength  was  furprifingly  lengthened  out,  and  my 
 thoughts  quick  and  lively,  and  my  foul  refiefhed,  hoping  it 
 might  be  a  work  for  God.  Oh,  how  good,  how  fweet  it  is, 
 to  labour  for  God ! 
 
 Tuefday,  September  22.  Was  again  employed  in  reading 
 and  correcting,  and  had  the  fame  fuccefs,  as  the  day  before. 
 I  was  exceeding  weak ;  but  it  feemed  to  refrefh  my  foul,  thus 
 to  fpend  time. 
 
 Wednefday,  September  23.  I  finiflaed  my  correclions  of 
 the  little  piece  forementioned,  and  felt  uncommcnly  peaceful: 
 it  feemed  as  if  I  had  now  done  all  my  work  in  this  world,  and 
 flood   ready   for  my   call  to  a  better.     As  long  as  I  fee   any 
 
 *  This  young  gentleman  was  an  ingenious,  ferious,  flndious, 
 and  hopefully  truly  pious  perfon :  there  appeared  in  him  many 
 qualities  giving  hope  of  his  beinjj  a  great  blefling  in  liis  day.  But 
 it  has  pleafed  God,  (ince  the  death  of  his  brother,  to  take  him  a- 
 way  alfo.  He  died  that  winter,  at  New-Haven,  on  January  6. 
 1747-8.  of  a  nervovw  fever,  after  about  a  fortnight's  illnefs, 
 
 thing 
 
i48  THE     LIFE     OF  yi.D.  1747. 
 
 thing  to  be  done  for  God,  life  is  worth  having :  but  Ob,  how 
 
 vain  and  unworthy  it  is,  to  live  fot  any  lower  end  I This 
 
 day,  I  indited  a  letter,  I  think,  of  great  importance,  to  the 
 Reverend  Air  Byram  in  New-Jerfey  :  Oh  that  God  would 
 blefs  and  luccet-d  tliat  letter,  which  was  written  for  the  bener 
 fit  of  his  church  *!  Oh  that  God  would  purify  the  Jens  'f 
 Levi,  that  his  glory  nnay  be  advanced  I 1  bib  night,  1  en- 
 dured a  dreadful  turn,  wherein  my  life  was  expedlcd  Icaicc  an 
 hour  or  minute  together.  But  bklTed  be  God,  I  have  enjojed 
 confiderable  fweetnefs  in  divine  things,  this  week,  both  by 
 jiight  and  day. 
 
 Thurfday,  September  24.  My  ftrength  began  to  fail  ex- 
 ceedingly ;  which  looked  iuither  as  if  1  had  dene  ail  my  work  : 
 however,  I  had  ftrength  to  fold  and  luperlciibe  my  letter. 
 About  two  I  went  to  bed,  being  weak  and  much  difordeied, 
 and  lay  in  a  burning  ievcr  till  night,  without  any  pr^'ptr  rtft. 
 In  the  evening,  1  g-)t  tp,  having  lain  dovn  in  Icjmc  of  my 
 cloaths;  but  was  in  the  grcatcft  diflrcf>,  that  ever  I  endured, 
 having  an  uncommon  kind  of  hiccough  ;  which  either  Ifrang- 
 led  me,  or  threw  me  into  a  ftraining  to  vomit ;  and  at  the 
 fame  time  was  diftrefled  with  griping  pains.  Ob,  the  di- 
 ftrefs  of  this  evening!  I  had  little  cxpeOation  of  my  living 
 the  night  through,  nor  indeed  had  any  about  me:  and  I  long- 
 ed for  the  fwjb'ng  moment! I  was  obliged  to  repair  to 
 
 bed  by  fix  o'clock;  and  through  -micrcy   enjoyed  foinc  reft; 
 
 but  w'as  grievoufly  diftrefled  at  turns  with  the  hiccough. 
 
 >Iy  foul  breathed  after  God,  while  the  watcher  was  with  me: 
 
 "  When   ftiall  I  come   to   God,  even    to   God,  my   ex- 
 
 "  ceeding  joy?     Oh  for  his  bleffed  likenefs!" 
 
 Friday,  September  25.  I  his  day,  I  was  unfpeakably  weak, 
 and  little  better  than  fpeechlefs  all  the  day  :  however, 
 I  was  able  to  write  a  little,  and  felt  comfortably  in  fome  part 
 of  the  day.  Oh,  it  refrefhcd  my  foul,  to  think  of  former 
 things,  of  defires  to  glorify  God,  cf  the  plcafures  of  living  to 
 him !  *'  Oh  my  dear  God,  1  am  fpecdily  coming  to  thee,  I 
 "  hope!  haften  the  day,  O  Lord,  if  it  be  thy  bleffed  will: 
 *'  Oh  come.  Lord  Jefus,  come  quickly.     Amen  f ." 
 
 *  It  was  concerning  the  qualifications  of  minijiers,  and  the 
 examination  and  licenfing  of  candidates  for  the  work  of  the  mini- 
 ftry. 
 
 ■\  This  was  the  lafl  that  ever  he  wrote  in  his  didry  with  his 
 own  hand  :  though  it  is  continiieH  a  little  farther,  in  a  broken  man- 
 ner ;  written  by  his  brnther  ifra^l,  but  indited  by  his  mouth  in 
 iJiis  his  weak  and  dying  flatc. 
 
 Saturday, 
 
Mt.  30.     Mr     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  249 
 
 Saturday,  September  16.  I  felt  the  fweetnefs  of  divine 
 things,  this  forenoon  ;  and  had  the  confolation  of  a  confciouf- 
 nefs  that  I  was  doing  fomething  for  God. 
 
 Lord's  day,  September  27.  I'his  was  a  very  comfortable 
 day  to  my  foul;  I  think,  J  awokeivilh  God.  1  was  enabled 
 to  lift  up  my  foul  to  God,  early  this  morning ;  and  while  I  had 
 little  bodily  Orength,  I  found  freedom  to  lift  up  my  heart  to 
 God  for  myfelf  and  others.  Afterwards,  was  pleafed  with 
 the  thoughts  of  fpsedily  entering  into  the  unfeen  world. 
 
 {[Early  this  morning,  as  one  of  the  family  came  into  the 
 rooin,  he  exprefTed  himfelf  thus  :  "  I  have  had  more  ple&fure 
 "  this  morning,  than  all  the  drunkards   in  the  world  enjoy, 
 
 "  if  it  were  all  extracted  1" So  much  did  he  efteem  the 
 
 joy  of  faith  above  the  pleafures  rf  fn. 
 
 He  felt,  that  morning,  an  unufual  appetite  to  food;  with 
 which  his  mind  feemed  to  be  exhilarated^  as  looking  on  it  a 
 fign  of  the  very  near  approach  of  death;  and  faid  upon  it, 
 "  I  was  born  on  a  Sabbath-day ;  and  I  have  reafon  to  think  I 
 *'  was  new-born  on  a  Sabbath-day  ;  and  I  hope  I  (hall  die  on 
 "  this  Sabbath-day :  I  Ihali  look  upon  it  as  a  favour,  if  it 
 *'  may  be  the  will  of  God  that  it  lliouid  be  fo  :  I  long  for  the 
 **'  time.  Oh,  why  is  his  chariot  fo  long  in  coming?  why 
 "  tarry  the  wheels  of  his  chariots?  I  am  very  willing  to 
 ^'  part  with  all :  I  am  willing  to  part  with  my  dear  brother 
 "  John,  and  never  to  fee  him  again,  to  go  to  be  for  ever  with 
 ,"  the  Lord  *.  Oh,  when  I  go  there,  how  will  God's  dear 
 "  church  on  earth  be  upon  my  mind !" 
 
 Afterwards,  the  fame  morning,  being  aflced,  how  he  did  ? 
 he  anfwered,  "  I  am  almoft  in  cterni'^y ;  1  long  to  be  there. 
 "  My  work  is  djne  :  1  have  done  with  all  my  friends:  all 
 "  the  world  is  mthing  to  me.  I  long  to  be  in  heaven,  prai' 
 "  I^^S  and  florfy  ng  God  with  the  holy  angels:  all  my  defire 
 "  is  to  glorify  God." 
 
 During  the  whole  ofthefe  lafl:  two  weeks  of  his  life,  he 
 feemed  to  continue  in  this  frame  of  heart,  loofe  from  all  the 
 world,  as  having  done  his  work,  and  done  with  all  things  here 
 below,  having  nothing  to   do   but  to  die,  and  abiding  in  an 
 
 *  He  had,  before  this,  exprefTed  a  defire,  if  it  might  be  the  will 
 of  God,  to  live  till  his  brother  returned  from  New-Jerfcy:  who, 
 when  he  went  away,  intended,  ifpoflible,  to  perform  his  journey, 
 and  return  in  a  fortnight;  hoping  once  more  to  meet  his  brother  in 
 the  land  of  the  living.  The  fortnight  was  now  ne-ir  expired,  it 
 ended  the  next  day. 
 
 I  i  earned 
 
:i5o     •  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F  A.  D.  1747. 
 
 carneft  defire  and  expe^lation  of  the  happy  moment,  when 
 his  fjul  (hould  take  its  flight,  and  go  to  a  Ibte  of  perfection 
 of  holinefs  and  perfe<!;l  glorifying  and  enjoying  God,  manifeft- 
 ed  in  a  variety  0/  exprellions.  He  laid,  "  1  hat  the  confide- 
 "  ration  of  the  day  of  death,  and  the  day  of  judgment,  had  a 
 '*  long  time  been  peculiarly  fweet  to  him."  He  from  time 
 to  time  fpake  of  his  being  willing  to  leave  the  body  and  the 
 world  'r,nincd:ateiy,  that  day,  that  night,  and  that  moment,  if 
 it  was  the  will  ot  God.  He  al fo  was  much  in  exprefling  his 
 longings  that  the  church  of  Chriil  on  earth  might  fiourilli,  and 
 Chiift's  kingdom  here  might  be  advanced,  notwithftanding  he 
 was  about  to  leave  the  earth,  and  fliould  not  with  his  eyes 
 behold  the  delirablc  event,  nor  be  inftrumental  in  promoting, 
 it.  He  faid  to  me,  one  morning,  as  I  came  into  the  room, 
 "  My  thoughts  have  been  employed  on  the  old  dear  theme, 
 '<  the  profpcr'ity  of  God's  church  on  earth.  As  I  waked  out 
 "  of  lleep,  1  was  led  to  cry  for  the  pouring  out  of  God's 
 "  Spirit,  and  the  advancement  of  Chrift's  kingdom,  which 
 "  the  dear  Redeemer  did  and  fuffered  fo  much  for.     It  is  thai 
 
 "  efpecially   makes  me  long  for  it." He  exprefled  much 
 
 hope  that  a  glorious   advancement  of  Chrift's  kingdom  was 
 near  at  hand. 
 
 He  once  told  me,  that  "  he  had  formerly  longed  for  the 
 "'  outpouring  of  the  Spirit  of  God,  and  the  glorious  times  of 
 "  the  church,  and  hoped  they  were  coming ;  and  ihoulci  have 
 *'  been  willing  to  have  lived  to  promote  religion  at  that  timC;, 
 "  if  that  had  been  the  will  of  God;  but  (fays  he)  I  am  will- 
 "  ing  it  faould  be  as  it  is ;  I  would  not  have  the  choice  to 
 "  make  for  myfelf,  for  ten  thoufand  worlds."  He  exprefled 
 on  his  deathbed  a  full  perfualion  that  he  Ihould  in  heaven  fee 
 the  profperity  of  the  church  on  earthy  and  ihould  rejoice 
 Avith  Chrifi:  therein  ;  and  the  conlideration  of  it  feemed  to  be 
 hiohly  pleafmg  and  fatisfying  to  his  mind. 
 
 He  alfo  ftill  dwelt  much  oa  the  great  importance  of  the 
 work  of  w/wy?^' J"  of  the  gofpel;  and  exprefled  his  longings, 
 that  they  might  be  filed  ivith  the  Spirit  of  God;  and  mani- 
 fcffed  much  defue  to  ice  fome  of  the  neighbouring  miniflers, 
 whom  he  had  fome  acquaintance  M'ith,  and  whofe  fmcere 
 trienddiip  he  M'as  confident  of,  that  he  might  convcrfe  free- 
 ly with  them  on  that  fubjeft,  before  he  died.  And  it  fo  hap- 
 pened, that  he  had  opportunity  with  fome  of  them,  accord- 
 ing to  his  defire. 
 
 Another  thing  that  lay  much  on  his  heartj  and  that  he 
 fpake  of,  from  time  to  time,  in  thefe  near  approaches  of 
 death,  was  the  fpiritual  profperity   of  his   own  congregation 
 
 of 
 
/Et.20.      Mk    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  25 1 
 
 of  Chriftian  Indians  in  New-Jerfey :  and  when  he  fpake  of 
 them,  it  was  with  peculiar  tendernefs  :  fo  that  his  fpeech 
 would  be  prefently  interrupted  and  drowned  with  tears. 
 
 He  alfo  exprelTed  much  fatisfa^lion  in  the  difpofids  of  Pro- 
 vidence, with  regard  to  the  circumftances  of  his  death;  parti- 
 cularly that  God  had  before  his  death  given  him  the  opportu- 
 nity he  had  had  in  Bofton,  with  fo  many  confiderabie  pcrfons, 
 minifters  and  others,  to  give  in  h':s  tefthn'.r.y  for  God,  and 
 againft  falfe  religion,  and  many  miftakes  that  lead  to  it,  and 
 promote  it ;  and  there  to  lay  before  pious  and  charitable  gentle- 
 men, the  ftate  of  the  Indians,  and  their  neccfaties,  to  fo  good 
 &St(X',  and  that  God  had  ilnce  given  him  opportunity  to 
 write  to  them  further  concerning  thefe  affairs ;  and  to  write 
 other  letters  of  importance,  that  he  hoped  might  be  of  good 
 influence  with  regard  to  the  ftate  of  religion  among  the  In- 
 dians, and  elfcwhere,  after  his  death.  He  exprelfgd  great 
 thank fulnefs  to  God  for  his  mercy  in  thefe  things.  He  alfo 
 mentioned  it  as  what  he  accounted  a  merciful  ciicumftance  of 
 his  death,  that  he  fliould  die  here  *.  And  fpeaking  of  thefe 
 things,  he  faid,  "  God  had  granted  him  all  his  defue ;"  and 
 fignified,  that  now  he  could  with  the  greater  alacrity  leave  the 
 world.3 
 
 Monday,  September  28.  I  was  able  to  read,  and  make  fome 
 few  correftions  in  my  private  writings ;  but  found  I  could 
 not  write,  as  I  had  done;  I  found  myftlf  fenfibly  declined  in 
 all  refpccts.  It  has  been  only  from  a  little  while  before  noon, 
 till  about  one  or  two  o'clock,  that  I  have  been  able  to  do  any 
 thing  for  fome  time  pafl: :  yet  this  refrelhed  my  heart,  that  I 
 could  do  any  thing,  either  public  or  private,  that  I  hoped  was- 
 for  God. 
 
 [This  evening,  he  was  fuppofed  to  be  dying :  he  thought 
 fo  himfelf,  and  was  thought  fo  by  thofe  who  were  about  him. 
 
 *  The  editor  takes  leave  to  make  the  remark,  that  when  Mr 
 Brainerd  was  at  Bofton,  (ick  nigh  unto  death,  it  was  with  reludance 
 he  thought  of  dying  in  a  place  vAi&xi  funerals  are  often  attended  with 
 ^  pomp  2inAJI)0"jj,  which  (efpecially  on  occ^fion  cf  his  own)  he  was 
 very  averfe  to  any  appearance  of:  and  tliough  it  was  with  fome  dif- 
 ficulty he  got  his  mind  reconciled  to  the  piofpcft  then  before  him, 
 yet  at  lail  he  was  brought  to  acquiefce  in  tiic  divine  wi!!,  with  refpeft 
 to  this  circumftance  of  his  departure.  However,  it  pleafjd  God  to 
 order  the  event  fo  as  to  gratify  his  flcjlre,  which  he  had  expreffed, 
 of  getting  back  to  Northampton,  with  a  view  particularly  to  a  more 
 filent  and  private  burial. 
 
 I  i  2  He 
 
552  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  r  A.D,irA7^ 
 
 He  feemed  glad  at  the  appearance  of  the  near  approach  of 
 death.  He  was  ahuoA  fpeechlefs,  but  his  lips  appeared  to 
 move  :  and  one  that  fat  vcr)'  near  him,  heard  him  utter  fuch 
 exprelTions  as  thefe,  *'  Come,  Lord  Jefus,  come  quickly. — 
 *•  Oh,  why  is  his  chariot  fo  long  in  coming!" — After  he  re- 
 vived, he  blamed  himfclf  for  having  been  too  eager  to  be  gone. 
 And  m  expre fling  what  he  found  m  the  frame  of  his  mind  at 
 that  time,  he  faid,  he  then  found  an  inexpreflibly  f\^eet  love 
 to  thofe  that  he  looked  upon  as  belonging  to  Chi  ifi,  beyond 
 almoft  all  that  ever  he  felt  before  ;  fo  that  it  "feemed  (to  ufe 
 his  own  words)  like  a  little  piece  of  heaven  lo  have  one  of 
 them  near  him."'  And  being  aflted,  whether  he  heard  the 
 prayer  that  was  (at  his  defire)  made  with  him  ;  he  faid, 
 ^'  Yes,  he  heard  every  word,  and  had  an  uncommon  fenfe  of 
 *'  the  things  that  were  uttered  in  that  prayer,  and  that  every 
 */  word  reached  his  heart." 
 
 .On  the  evening  of  the  next,  viz,  TuefJay,  September  29. 
 as  he  lay  in  his  bed,  he  feemc^'  ^c  be  in  an  extraordmarv  trame; 
 his  mind  greatlv  engaged  in  fweet  meditations  concerning  the 
 profpcrity  of  Zion  :  there  being  prefent  here  at  that  time  two 
 young  gentlemen  of  his  acquaintence,  that  were  candidatts 
 for  the  min[f}ryy  he  defired  us  all  to  unite  in  finging  a  Pfalm 
 on  that  lub|C(^t,  even  Zion's  profperity.  And  on  his  dcfire 
 v^e  fung  a  part  of  the  ciid  Plalm.  This  feemed  much  to  re- 
 frefh  and  revive  him,  and  gave  him  new  flrength;  fo  that, 
 though  before  he  could  icarce'y  fpeak  at  all,  now  he  proceed- 
 ed, with  fome  freedom  of  ipcech,  to  give  bis  dying  counfek 
 to  thufe  two  young  gentlemen  foremcntio.ned,  rtiating  to  their 
 preparation  tor,  and  profecution  of  that  great  work  of  the  mini- 
 ftry  they  were  defigned  for ;  and  in  particular,  earneftly  re- 
 commended to  them  frequent  Iccret  fcflitig  anc'  frrytr :  and 
 enforced  his  counfel  with  regard  to  this,  from  h;s  own  experi' 
 ence  of  the  great  comfort  and  benefit  of  it ;  which  (faid  he)  I 
 ih'!uJd.no!;  iiuTirjon>  were  it  not  that  I  zm  a.  dying  perfon. 
 ^And  after  he  had  finiflied  his  counlcl,  he  made  a  prayer,  in 
 trie  audience  of  us  aii ;  wherejii,  befides  praying  for  this  fami- 
 Iv,  for  his  brethren,  and  thofe  candidates  for  the  miniftry, 
 aiiH  for  his  own  congregation,  he  earncf^]y  prayed  for  the  re- 
 viving and  fl  )uiil]"iing  of  religion  in  the  world. 
 
 Til!  now,  he  had  every  day  iat  up  part  of  the  day  ;  but 
 after  this  he  never  rofe  from  his  bed.] 
 
 '\Vednefday,  September  3c.  I  was  obliged  to  keep  my  bed 
 the  whole  day,  through  wcaknefs.  However,  redeemed  a 
 iittle  tiftie,  and  wi^h  the  help  of  my  brother,  read  and  cor- 
 
M20'       Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  253 
 
 TeOied  about  a  dozen  pages  in  my  M.  S.  giving  an  account  of 
 my  converfion. 
 
 Thurfday,  Oftober  1.  I  endeavoured  again  to  do  fomething 
 by  vi^ay  of  writing,  but  roon  found  my  powers  of  body  and 
 mind  utterly  fail.  Felt  not  fo  fweetly,  as  when  I  was  able  to 
 do  fomething  that  I  hoped  would  do  fome  good.  In  the  even- 
 ing, was  diicompofed  and  wholly  delirious;  but  it  was  not 
 long  before  God  was  pleafed  to  give  me  fome  fleep,  and  fully 
 compofed  my  mind  *.  Oh,  biefled  be  God  for  his  great 
 goodnefs  to  me,  imce  I  was  (o  low  at  Mr  Bromfield's,  on 
 Thurfday  June  18.  laft  part.  He  has,  except  thofe  few 
 minutes,  given  me  the  clear  exercife  of  my  reafon,  and  en- 
 abled me  to  labour  much  for  him,  in  things  both  of  a  public 
 and  private  nature  ;  and  perhaps  to  do  more  good,  than  I 
 fiiould  have  done  if  I  had  been  well  ;  bcfides  the  comfortable 
 influences  of  his  bleffed  Spirit,  with  which  he  has  been  pleafed 
 to  refreih  my  foul.  May  his  name  have  all  the  glory  for  e- 
 ver  and  ever.     Amen. 
 
 Friday,  Otftobcr  2.  My  foul  was  this  day,  at  turns,  fweetly 
 iet  on  God  :  I  longed  to  be  with  him,  that  1  might  behold  his- 
 glory:  I  felt  fweetly  difpofed  to  commit  all  to  him,  even  my 
 deareft  friends,  my  deareft  flock,  and  my  ablent  brother,  and 
 all  my  concerns  for  time  and  eternity.  Oh  that  hh  kingdom 
 might  come  in  the  world ;  that  they  might  all  love  and  glori- 
 fy him,  for  what  he  is  in  himfelf ;  and  that  the  biefled  Re- 
 deemer might  "  fee  of  the  travail  of  his  foul,  and  be  fatil- 
 *.^  fied !     Oh,  come,  Lord  Jefus,  come  quickly !     Amen  f ." 
 
 •  [The  next  evening,  we  very  much  expefled  his  brother 
 John  from  New-Jerfey ;  it  being  about  a  week  after  the  time 
 that  he  propofcd  for  his  return,  when  he  went  away.  And 
 though  our  expectations  were  flill  difappointed ;  yet  Mr 
 Brainerd  fcemed  to  continue  unmoved,  in  the  fame  calm  and 
 peaceful  Frame,  that  he  had  before  manifefl:ed  ;  as  having  re- 
 iigned  all  to  God,  and  having  done  with  his  friends,  and  with 
 all  things  here  below. 
 
 On  the  morning  of  the  next  day,  being  Lord's  day,  Oc- 
 tober 4.  as  my  daughter  Jeruiha  (who  chiefly  tended  him) 
 came  into  the  room,  he  looked  on  her  very   pleafantly,  and 
 
 *  From  this  time  forv/arcl,  he  had  the  free  ufe  of  his  reafon  till 
 the  day  before  his  death;  excepting  that  at  fome  times  he  appear- 
 «?d  a  little  loft  for  a  moment,  at  firil  waking  out  of  fleep. 
 
 f  Here  ends  his  diary :  thefe  are  the  laj}  nvordj,  that  are  writ- 
 «sn  in  it,  either  b/  his  own  hand,  or  by  any  other  from  his  mouth. 
 
 iaid, 
 
254  T  H  E     L  I  F  E     O  F  J.  D.  1747. 
 
 iaid,  "  Dear  Jerudia,  are  you  willing  to  part  with  me? — ^I  am 
 ^  quite  willing  to  part  with  you :  I  am  willing  to  part  with 
 *'  all  my  friends :  I  am  willing  to  part  with  my  dear  brother 
 "  John,  although  I  love  him  the  bed  of  any  creature  living : 
 *^  I  have  committed  him  and  all  my  friends  to  God,  and  can 
 *'  leave  them  with  God.  Though,  if  I  thought  I  fliould  not 
 *'  fee  you,  and  be  happy  with  you  in  another  world  I  could 
 ^'  not  bear  to  part  with  you.  But  we  Ihall  fpend  an  happy 
 "  eternity  together  * !"  In  the  evening,  as  one  came  into 
 the  room  with  a  Bible  in  her  hand,  he  cxprefTed  himfelf  thus; 
 *'  Oh,  that  dear  book !  that  lovely  book !  I  fhall  foon  fee  it. 
 *'  opened !  the  myfteries  that  are  in  it,  and  the  rayfteries  of 
 *^  God's  providence,  will  be  all  unfolded  !" 
 
 His  diftemper  now  very  apparently  preyed  on  his  vitals  in 
 ;jin  extraordinary  manner:  not  by  a  fudden  breaking  of  w/cf;\r 
 in  his  lungs,  as  at  Bofton,  but  by  a  conftant  difcharge  of  pu- 
 rulent matter,  in  great  quantities :  fo  that  what  he  brought  up 
 by  expeftcration,  feemed  to  be  as  it  were  mouth fuls  of  al- 
 sioli  clear  pus  ;  which  v/as  attended  with  very  great  inward 
 pain  and  diftrefs. 
 
 On  Thurfday,  Oftober  6.  he  lay,  for  a  confiderable  time, 
 as  if  he  were  dying.     At  which  time,  he  was  heard  to  utter, 
 
 *  Siace  this,  it  has  pleafed  a  holy  and  fovereign  God  to  take 
 away  this  my  dear  child  by  death,  on  the  14th  of  February,  next 
 following  ;  after  a  fhort  ilJnefs  of  five  days ;  in  the  eighteenth 
 year  of  her  age.  She  was  a  perfon  of  much  the  fame  fpirit  with 
 Mr  Brainerd.  She  had  conftantly  taken  care  of,  and  attended  him 
 in  his  ficknefs,  for  nineteen  weeks  before  his  death  ;  devoting  her- 
 felf  to  it  with  great  delight,  becaufe  flie  looked  on  him  as  an  emi- 
 jscnt  fervant  of  Jefus  Chrift.  In  this  time,  he  had  much  conver- 
 falion  with  her  on  things  of  religion  ;  and  in  his  dying  ftate,  often 
 exprefled  to  us,  her  parects,  his  great  fatisfadion  conceining  her 
 true  piety,  arid  his  confidence  that  he  fhoald  meet  her  in  heaven  ; 
 and  his  high  opinion  of  her,  not  only  as  a  true  Chriftian,  but  a  very 
 eminent  faint ;  one  whofe  foul  was  uncommonly  fed  and  entertain- 
 ed with  things  that  appertain  to  the  mo/1  fpiritual,  experimental, 
 and  diilinguiihing  parts  of  religion  ;  and  one  wJio,  by  the  temper  of 
 her  mind,  was  fitted  to  deny  herfelf  for  God,  and  to  do  good,  be- 
 yond any  young  women  whatfoever  that  he  knew  of.  She  had  ma- 
 nifefted  a  heart  uncommonly  devoted  to  God,  in  the  courfe  of  her 
 life,  many  years  before  her  death ;  and  i^id  ou  her  deathbed, 
 ihat  "  fhe  had  not  feen  one  minute  for  feveral  years,  wherein  rtie 
 *'  defired  to  live  one  minute  longer,  for  the  fake  of  any  other  good 
 *'  in  life,  but  doing  good,  living  to  God,  and  doing  what  might  be 
 '*  for  his  glory." 
 
 in 
 
^/.30.        Mr     DAVID     BRAINERD.         15^ 
 
 in  broken  \vhifpers,  fuch  exprefiions  as  thefe ;  "  He  will 
 **  come,  he  will  not  tarry. — 1  fhall  foon  be  in  glory. — I  fnall 
 
 "  foon  trior ify  God  with  the  angels." But  after  fome  time 
 
 he  revived. 
 
 The  next  day,  viz.  Wednefday,  0£lober  7.  his  brother 
 John  arrived,  being  returned  from  New-Jerfey;  where  he 
 had  been  detained  much  longer  than  he  intended,  by  a  mortal 
 fickncfs  prevailing  among  the  Chriftian  Indians,  and  by  fome 
 other  things  in  their  circumftances  that  made  his  ftay  with 
 them  neccffary.  Mr  Brainerd  was  aftecled  and  refrefhed  with 
 feeinw  him,  and  appeared  fully  fatisfied  with  the  reafons  of 
 his  delay;  feeing  the  intereil  of  rehgion  and  of  the  fouls  of 
 his  people  required  it. 
 
 The  next  day,  Thurfday,  Oftobcr  8.  he  was  in  great  dl- 
 ilrefs  and  agonies  of  body  ;  and  for  the  bigger  part  of  the  day, 
 Avas  much  difordered  as  to  the  exercife  of  his  reafon.  In  the 
 evenincT,  he  was  more  compofed,  and  had  the  ufe  of  his  rea- 
 fon well;  but  the  pain  of  his  body  continued  and  increafed. 
 He  told  me,  it  was  impolTible  for  any  to  conceive  of  the  di- 
 ftrefs  he  felt  in  his  bread.  He  manifefled  much  concern  left 
 he  fhould  diflionour  God  by  impatience,  under  his  extreme 
 agony ;  which  was  fuch,  that  he  faid,  the  thought  of  endu- 
 ring it  one  minute  longer  was  aimofl  infupportable.  He  de- 
 fired,  that  others  would  be  much  in  Ufting  up  their  hearts 
 continually  to  God  for  him,  that  God  would  fupport  him,  and 
 give  him  patience.  He  fignified,  that  he  expected  to  die  that 
 night;  but  feemed  to  fear  a  longer  delay  :  and  the  difpofitionc 
 of  his  mind  v^ith  regard  to  death  appeared  ftill  the  fame  that 
 it  had  been  all  along.  And  notwithftanding  his  bodily  ago- 
 nies, yet  the  intereil  of  Zion  lay  fcill  with  great  weight  on  his 
 mind;  as  appeared  by  fome  conflderable  difcourfe  he  had  that 
 evening  with  the  Reverend  Mr  Billing,  one  of  the  neighbouring 
 minifters,  (who  was  then  prefent),  concerning  the  great  im- 
 portance of  the  work  of  the  miniftry,  6c.  And  afterwards, 
 when  it  was  very  late  in  the  night,  he  had  much  very  proper 
 .tnd  profitable  difcourfe  with  his  brother  John,  concerning 
 his  congregation  in  New-Jerfey,  and  the  intc-reft  of  religion 
 among  the  Indians.  In  the  latter  part  of  the  night,  his  bo- 
 dily diftrefs  feemed  to  rife  to  a  greater  height  than  ever ;  and 
 he  faid  to  thofe  then  about  him,  that  "  it  was  another  thin^ 
 ^'  to  die,  than  people  imagined ;"  explaining  himfeif  to  mean 
 that  they  were  not  av/are  what  bodily  pain  and  anguifh  is  un- 
 dergone before  death.  Towards  day,  his  eyes  fixed ;  and 
 he  continued  lying  immoveable,  till  about  fix  o'clock  in  the 
 morning,    and  then   expired,    on   Friday,    October  9.  1747. 
 
 when 
 
35^  T  H  E     L  I  F  E,     6e,  ^.D.ij^y^ 
 
 when  his  foul,  as  we  may  well  conclude,  was  received  by 
 his  dear  Lord  and  Mafter,  as  an  eminently  faithful  fervanr, 
 into  that  ftate  of  perfection  of  holinefs,  and  fruition  of  God, 
 which  he  had  {o  often  and  (o  ardently  longed  for  ;  and  was 
 welcomed  by  the  glorious  aflembly  in  the  upper  world,  as  one 
 peculiarly  fitted  to  join  them  in  their  bleffed  employments  and 
 enjoyment.-. 
 
 Much  refpeft  was  fhcwn  to  his  memory  at  his  funeral ; 
 which  was  on  the  Monday  following,  after  a  fermon  preached 
 the  fame  day,  on  that  folemn  occafion.  His  funeral  was  at- 
 tended by  eight  of  the  neighbouring  minifters,  and  feventeen 
 other  gentlemen  of  liberal  education,  and  a  great  concourfe 
 ©f  people.] 
 
 Some 
 
Some  further  R  E  M  A I N  S  of  the  Reve- 
 rend Mr  David   Brainerd. 
 
 I.  A  Scheme  of  a  dialogue  between  the  various 
 ■powers  and  affections  of  the  mind,  as  they  are  found 
 alternately  whilpering  in  the  ^(5t//y/W.  (Mentioned 
 in  his  diary,  February  3.  1744) 
 
 1.  ^''TT^WY^  under JlandlngmXxoAwc^^,  (i.)  As  difcovf ring  its 
 Jl  own  excellency,  and  capacity  of  enjoying  the  ni  )ft 
 fublime  pleafure  and  happinefs.  (2.}  As  obferving  its 
 defire  equal  to  its  capacity,  and  incapahle  of  being  fatu-ficd 
 with  any  thing  that  will  not  fill  it  in  the  utmofl  extent  of 
 its  excrcife.  (3-)  As  finding  itfelf  a  dependent  thing,  not 
 felf  fufficient;  and  confequently  unable  to  fpin  happinefs  (as 
 the  fpider  fpin?  its  web)  out  of  its  own  bowels.  This  Itlf- 
 futficicncy  obferved  to  be  the  property  and  prerogaiive  of 
 God  alone,  and  not  belonging  t  j  any  created  being.  (4.)  As 
 in  vain  feeking  fublime  pleafure,  fat  is  faft  ion,  and  happinf  fs 
 adequate  to  its  nature,  amongft  created  beings.  The  leaich 
 and  knowledge  of  the  truth  in  the  natural  world  allowed  in- 
 deed  to  be  refrelhing  to  the  mind;  but  ftill  failing  to  aiford 
 complete  happinefs.  (5.)  As  difcovering  the  excellency  and 
 glory  of  God,  that  he  is  the  fountain  of  goodncfs,  and  well- 
 fpring  of  happinefs,  and  every  way  fit  to  anfwer  the  enlarged 
 defires  and  cravings  of  our  immortal  fouls. 
 
 2.  The  will  introduced,  as  neceflarily,  yet  freely  chufing 
 this  God  for  its  fupreme  happinefs  anJ  only  portion,  fully 
 complying  with  the  underftanding's  diflates,  acquicfcing  in 
 God  as  the  bcft  good,  his  will  as  the  befl:  rule  for  intelligent 
 creatures,  and  rejoicing  that  God  is  in  every  refpect  juft 
 what  he  is ;  and  withal  chufing  and  delighting  to  be  a  depen- 
 dent creature,  always  fubjeft  to  this  God,  not  afpiring  after 
 fclf  fufficiency  and  fupremacy,  but  acquiefcing  in  the  con- 
 trary. 
 ^  K  k  3.  Ardent 
 
25^  THE     LIFE     OF 
 
 3.  Ardent  love  or  dejire  introduced,  as  pafTionately  longing 
 to  plcafc  and  glorify  the  divine  Being,  to  be  in  every  refpeft 
 conformed  to  him,  and  in  that  way  to  enjoy  him.  This  lovr 
 or  defire  reprefented  as  mofl  genuine  ;  not  induced  by  meari 
 and  mercenary  views ;  not  primarily  fpringing  from  felfifli 
 hopes  of  falvation,  whereby  tne  divine  glories  would  be  facri- 
 ficed  to  the  id'^1  felf :  not  arifing  from  a  flavifli  fear  of  divine 
 anger  in  cafe  ofnegle<ft,  nor  yet  from  hbpes  of  feeling  the 
 fweetnefs  of  that  tender  and  pleafant  paffion  of  love  in  one's 
 own  bread;  but  from  a  jufl  elleem  of  the  beauteous  obje<5l  be- 
 loved. This  I'jve  further  reprefented,  as  attended  with  vehe- 
 ment longings  after  the  enjoyment  of  its  objeft,  but  unable  to 
 find  by  what  means. 
 
 4.  The  underficind'ing  again  introduced,  as  informing,  (i.) 
 How  God  might  have  been  enjoyed,  yea,  how  he  muft  necef- 
 farily  have  been  enjoyed,  had  not  man  finned  againft  him  ; 
 that  as  there  was  knowledge,  liktnefs,  and  Icve,  fo  there  mufl 
 needs  be  enjoyment,  while  therii  was  no  impediment.  (2.) 
 How  he  may  be  enjoyed  in  fome  mcafure  now,  viz.  by  the 
 fame  knowledge,  begetting  likenefs  and  love,  which  will  be  an- 
 fwercd  with  returns  o^  love,  and  the  fmiles  of  God's  counte- 
 nance, which  are  better  than  life.  (3.)  How  God  may  be 
 perfectly  enjoyed,  viz.  by  the  foul's  perfeft  freedom  from  fin. 
 This  perfeifi  izeedom  never  obtained  till  death  ;  and  then  not 
 by  any  unaccountable  means,  or  in  any  unheard-of  manner; 
 but  the  fame  by  which  it  has  obtained  fome  likenefs  to  and 
 fruition  of  God  in  this  world,  viz.  a  clear  manifeffation  of 
 him. 
 
 5.  Holy  defire  appears,  and  inquires  why  the  foul  may  not 
 be  perfeflly  holy ;  and  fo  perfeft  in  the  enjoyment  of  God 
 here;  and  exprefTcs  moft  infatiablc  thirftings  after  fuch  a 
 temper,  and  fuch  fruition,  and  moft  confummate  blefled- 
 nefs. 
 
 6.  Under/landing  again  appears,  and  informs,  that  God  dc* 
 figns  that  thofe  whom  he  fanftifies  in  part  here,  and  intends 
 for  immortal  glory,  fhall  tarry  a  while  in  this  prefent  evil 
 world,  that  their  own  experience  of  temptations,  6c.  may 
 teach  them  how  great  the  deliverance  is,  which  God  has 
 wrought  for  them,  that  they  may  be  fwallowed  up  in  thank- 
 fulnefs  and  admiration  to  eternity;  as  alfo  that  they  may  be 
 inftrumental  of  doing  good  to  their  fellow-men.  Now  if  they 
 ^vere  perfectly  holy,  i,c.  a  world  of  fin  would  not  be  a  fit  ha- 
 bitation for  them  ;  and  further,  fuch  noanifeftations  of  God 
 as  are  neceflary  completely  to  fanclify  the  foul,  would  be  in' 
 fupportable  to  the  body,  fo  that  \vc  cannot  fee  God,  and  live. 
 
 7.  Holy 
 
Mr    DAVID     BRAINERD.  259 
 
 7.  Holy  impatience  is  next  introduced,  complaining  of  the 
 fins  and  forrows  of  life,  and  almoft  repining  at  the  diltance  of 
 a  ftate  of  perfection,  uneafy  to  fee  and  feel  the  hours  hang  lo 
 dull  and  heavy,  and  almoft  concluding  that  the  temptations, 
 hardftiips,  difappointments,  imperfections,  and  tedious  em.- 
 ployments  of  life  will  never  come  to  a  happy  period. 
 
 8.  Tender  confcience  comes  in,  and  meekly  reproves  the 
 complaints  of  impatience ;  urging  how  careful  and  watchful 
 we  ought  to  be,  left  we  fhould  olfend  the  divine  Being  wiih 
 complaints;  alledging  aUb  the  litnefs  of  our  waiting  patiently 
 upon  God  for  all  we  want,  and  that  in  a  way  ot  doing  and 
 fuiFering ;  and  at  the  fame  time  mentioning  the  barrenneis  of 
 the  foul,  how  much  precious  time  is  milimprovcd,  and  how 
 little  it  has  enjoyed  of  God,  compared  with  what  it  might 
 have  done  ;  as  alfo  fuggefting  how  frequently  impatient  com- 
 plaints fpring  from  nothing  better  than  felf-love,  want  of  re- 
 iignation,  and  a  greater  reverence  of  the  divine  Being. 
 
 9.  Judgment  or  found  7nind  next  appears,  and  duly  weighs 
 the  complaints  of /w/>(j.^/>«cd',  and  the  gentle  admonitions  of 
 tender  confcience,  and  impartially  determines  between  therr. 
 On  the  one  hand,  it  conclude*,  that  we  may  always  be  impa- 
 tient with  fin;  and  fuppofes,  that  we  may  alfo  with  fuch  for- 
 row,  pain,  and  difeouragement,  as  hinder  our  purfuit  of  holi- 
 nefs,  though  they  arife  from  the  weaknefs  of  nature.  It  al- 
 lows us  to  be  impatient  of  the  diftance  at  which  we  ftand  from 
 a  ffate  of  perfedfion  and  blefTednefs.  It  further  indulges  im- 
 patience at  the  delay  of  time,  when  we  defire  the  period  of  it 
 for  no  other  end  than  that  we  may  with  angels  be  employed 
 in  the  moft  lively  fpiritual  afts  of  devotion,  and  in  giving  all 
 poffible  glory  to  him  that  lives  for  ever.  Temptations  and 
 linful  imperfedions,  it  thinks  we  may  juftly  be  uneafy  with ; 
 and  difappointments,  at  leaft  thofe  that  relate  to  our  hopes  of 
 communion  with  God,  and  growing  conformity  to  him.  And 
 as  to  the  tedious  employments  and  hardihips  of  life,  it  fuppi- 
 fes  fome  longing  for  the  tn^  of  them  not  inconfiftent  with  a 
 fpirit  of  faithfulnefs,  and  a  cheerful  difpoiition  to  perform  the 
 one  and  endure  the  other:  it  fuppofes,  that  a  faithful  fervant, 
 
 •who  fully  defigns  to  do  all  he  poiTibly  can,  may  ftill juftly 
 long  for  the  evening ;  and  that  no  rational  man  would  blame 
 Ins  kind  and  tender  fpoufe,  if  he  perceived  her  longing  to  be 
 with  him,  while  yet  faithfulnefs  and  (,luty  to  him  miglit  ftiil  ii> 
 duce  her  to  yield,  for  the  prefent,  to  remain  at  a  painful  di- 
 ftance from  him. — On  the  other  hand,  it  approves  of  the  cau- 
 tion, care,  and  watchfiilnefs  of  tender  confcience,  left  the  di- 
 yinc  Being  fhould  be  offended  with  impatient  complaints :  it 
 
 K  k  2  acknowledges 
 
i6o  THELIFEOF 
 
 ackn  )wledges  the  fitnefs  of  our  ■watting  upon  God,  in  a  way 
 ol^  patient  doini  anJ  fuffering;  but  I'lippofes  this  very  coniift- 
 e  It  with  ardent  dcfires  to  depart,  and  to  be  with  Chr'ft.  It 
 owns  it  fie  that  we  fliould  always  remember  our  own  barren- 
 nefs,  and  thinks  alfo  that  we  ftiould  be  impatient  of  it,  and 
 confequently  long  for  a  ftate  of  freedom  from  it;  and  this, 
 not  fj  much  that  we  may  feel  the  happinefs  of  it,  but  that 
 God  may  have  the  glory.  It  grants,  that  impatient  com- 
 plaints often  fpring  from  felf  love,  and  want  of  refignation 
 and  humihty.  Such  as  thefe  it  difapproves ;  and  deter- 
 mines, we  fhould  be  impatient  only  of  ablcnce  from  God,  and 
 diffance  from  that  f^ate  and  temper  wherein  we  may  rapft  glo- 
 rify him. 
 
 10.  Godly  forroiv  introduced,  as  making  her  fad  moan,  not 
 fo  much  that  Ihe  is  kept  from  the  free  poffeflion  and  full  en- 
 joyment of  happinefs,  but  that  God  muff  be  diflionoured;  the 
 foul  being  ftill  in  a  world  of  fin,  and  itfelf  imperfeft.  She 
 here,  with  giief,  counts  over  part  faults,  prefent  temptations, 
 and  fears  for  the  future. 
 
 11.  Hope  or  hly  covfdence  appears,  and  feems  perfuaded 
 that  "  nothing  ihall  e^'er  feparale  the  foul  from  the  love  of 
 "  God  in  Chnfl  Jefus.''  It  expefts  divine  affiflance  and  grace 
 fufficient  for  all  the  doing  and  fulfering  work  of  time,  and 
 that  death  will  ere  long  put  a  happy  period  to  all  fm  and  fori 
 row ;  and  fo  takes  occafion  to  rejoice. 
 
 12.  Ctdly  fear,  or  h''y  jealoiify  here  fleps  in,  and  fuggcfts 
 fome  timorous  apprehenhons  of  the  danger  of  deception; 
 mentiouj  the  deceitfulnefs  of  the  heart,  the  great  influence 
 of  irregular  felf-love  in  a  fallen  creature  ;  inquires  whe- 
 ther irfelf  is  not  likely  to  have  fallen  in  with  delufion,  fince 
 the  mind  is  fo  dark,  and  fo  little  of  God  appears  to  the 
 foul;  and  queries  whether  all  its  hopes  of  pcrievering  grace 
 m^y  not  be  prefumption,  and  whether  its  corliJent  expcfta* 
 tlons  of  meeting  death  as  a  friend,  may  not  iflue  in  difappoint- 
 lyient. 
 
 13.  Hereupon  refleStion  appears,  and  minds  the  perfon  of 
 his  paft  experiences ;  as  to  the  preparatory  work  of  convic- 
 tion and  humiliation;  the  view  he  then  had  of  the  impolTibi- 
 lity  of  falv;itijn,  from  him  felf,  or  any  created  arm:  the  ma- 
 rif' (lation  he  has  likewife  had  of  the  glory  of  God  in  Jefus 
 Chiifl:  how  he  then  admired  that  glory,  and  chofe  that  God 
 for  his  only  portion,  becaufe  of  the  excellency  and  amiable- 
 nefs  he  difcovered  in  him;  not  from  flavifh  fear  of  being 
 damned,  if  he  did  not,  nor  from  bafe  and  mercenary  hopes  of 
 faving  hlmfelf ;  bet  hom  a  juft  efteem  of  that  beauteous  and 
 
 glorious 
 
Mr    DAVID     BRAINERD.  a6i 
 
 glorious  objeft :  as  alfo  how  he  had  from  time  to  time  re- 
 joiced and  acquielced  in  God,  for  what  he  is  in  himfelf ; 
 being  delighted,  that  he  is  infinite  in  hoiinefs,  juftice,  power, 
 favf^reigiity,  as  wed  as  in  mercy,  goodnefs,  and  love:  how  he 
 has  likcrt  ile,  fcores  of  times,  felt  his  foul  mourn  for  lin,  for 
 this  very  rcafon,  becauie  it  is  contrary  and  grievous  to  God  ; 
 yea,  how  he  has  mourned  over  one  vain  and  impertinent 
 thought,  when  he  has  been  fo  far  from  fear  of  the  divine  vin- 
 di(5live  wrath  for  it,  that  on  the  contrary  he  has  enjoyed  the 
 h'.gheft  alfurance  of  the  divine  everlafting  love  :  how  he  has, 
 fi\m\  time  to  time,  delighted  in  the  commands  of  God,  for 
 their  own  purity  and  perfection,  and  longed  exceedingly  to 
 be  conformed  tJ  them,  and  even  to  be  "  holy,  as  God  is  holy  ;'* 
 and  counted  it  prcicm  heaven,  to  be  of  a  heavenly  temper: 
 huw  he  has  frequently  rejoiced,  to  think  of  being  for  ever 
 fubjeft  to,  gnd  dependent  on  God;  accounting  it  infinite- 
 ly greater  happincls  to  glorify  God  in  a  ftate  of  iubjec- 
 tion  to,  and  dependence  on  hirr,  than  to  be  a  god  him- 
 felf: and  how  heaven  itfelf  would  be  no  heaven  to  him, 
 if  he  could  not  there  be  every  thing  that  God  would  have 
 him  be. 
 
 14.  Upon  this,  y/)f>//«^/y£'«/^//o«  being  aM'akcd,  comes  in, 
 and  declares  that  (he  now  feelb  and  "  tafies  that  the  Lord  is 
 *'  gracious ;"  that  he  is  the  only  fupreme  good,  the  only  foul- 
 fati^fying  happinefs  ;  that  he  is  a  complete,  felf-fufficient, 
 and  almighty  portion.  She  whifpers,  "  Whom  have  I  in 
 "  heaven,''  but  this  God,  this  dear  and  blelTed  poition?  "  and 
 **  there  is  none  upon  earth  I  defire  befides  him."  Oh,  it  is 
 heaven,  to  pleafe  him,  and  to  be  jufl  what  be  would  have  mc 
 be  1  O  that  my  foul  were  '^  holy,  as  God  is  holy  !"  O  that 
 it  was  "  pure,  as  Chrift  is  pure ;"  and  "  perfe^V,  as  my  father 
 *'  in  heaven  is  perfect !"  Thefe  are  the  fweetefl  com.mands 
 in  God's  book,  comprifing  all  others;  and  fliall  1  break  them? 
 muil  1  break  them?  am  I  under  a  fatal  neceflity  of  it,  as 
 long  as  I  live  in  this  world?  Ch  my  foul!  wo,  wo  is  me, 
 that  I  am  a  finner !  becaufe  I  now  necefTarily  grieve  and 
 offend  this  blefled  God,  who  is  infinite  in  goodnefs  and  grace. 
 Oh,  methinks,  fhouid  he  punifh  me  for  my  fins,  it  would 
 not  wound  my  heart  fo  deep  to  oftcnd  him ;  but,  though  I 
 fin  continually,  he  continually  repeats  hi?  kindnefs  towards 
 rae !  Oh,  methinks  I  could  bear  any  fufFerin^;  but  how  can 
 I  bear  to  grieve  and  difiionour  this  blefied  God !  How  fhall 
 I  give  ten  thoufand  times  more  honour  to  him?  What  fhall 
 I  do,  to  glorify  and  worfhip  this  beft  of  beings?  O  that  J 
 Could  confccrate  rayfelf^  foul  and  body,  to  his  fervice  for  ever! 
 ■  '  O 
 
ft62  T  H  E    L  I  F  E    O  F 
 
 0  that  I  could  give  up  myfelf  to  him,  fo  as  never  more  ta 
 attempt  to  be  my  own,  or  to  have  any  will  or  affeftions  that 
 are  not  perfectly  conformed  to  his !  But  Oh,  alas,  alas !  I 
 cannot,  I  feel  I  cannot,  be   thus  entirely  devoted  to  God: 
 
 1  cannot  live  and  fin  not.  O  ye  angels,  do  yc  glorify  him 
 inceffantly :  if  poflible,  exert  yourfelves  ftill  more,  in  more 
 lively  and  ardent  devption :  if  poflible,  proftrate  yourfelves 
 flill  lower  before  the  throne  of  the  bleffed  King  of  heaven: 
 I  long  to  bear  a  part  with  you,  and  if  it  were  poflible,  to 
 help  you.  \  et  when  we  have  done,  we  fliall  not  be  able  to 
 offer  the  ten  thoufandth  part  of  the  homage  he  is  worthy  of. 
 While  fpirltual  fenfation  whifpered  thefe  things,  fear  and 
 jealoufy  were  greatly  overcome ;  and  the  foul  replied,  "  Now 
 ^*  I  know,  and  am  afliired,"  6c.  an*l  again  it  welcomed 
 death  as  a  friend,  faying,  "  O  death,  where  is  thy  fling!" 
 <bc. 
 
 15.  Finally,  holy  refolutkn  concludes  the  difcourfe,  fixedly 
 determining  to  foLloru  hard  after  God,  and  continually  to  pur- 
 fue  a  life  of  conformity  to  him.  And  the  better  to  purfue 
 ihis,  enjoining  it  on  the  foul  always  to  remember,  that  God 
 is  the  only  fource  of  happinefs,  that  his  will  is  the  only  rule 
 of  reflitude  to  an  intelligent  creature,  that  earth  has  nothing 
 in  it  defirable  for  itfelf,  or  any  further  than  God  is  feen  in 
 -it;  and  that  the  knowledge  of  God  in  Chrifl,  begetting  and 
 maintaining  love,  and  mortifying  fcnfual  and  fle/hly  appetites, 
 is  the  way  to  be  holy  on  earth,  and  fo  to  be  attempered  to  the 
 complete  holinefs  of  the  heavenly  world. 
 
 11.  Some  gloomy  and  defponding  thoughts  of  a  foul 
 tinder  convi^ions  of  fin^  and  concern  for  its  eternal 
 jfalvation. 
 
 I.  T   Believe,   my  cafe   is  fingular,    that  none  ever  had  fo 
 X    many  ftrange  and  ditferent  thoughts  and  feelings  as  I. 
 1.  I  have   been  concerned  much  longer  than  many  others, 
 that  I  have  known  or  read  of,  who  have  been  favingly  con- 
 •verted,  and  yet  I  am  left. 
 
 3.  I  have  with/lood  the  power  of  convi^'ions  a  long  time ; 
 and  therefore  I  fear,  I  ihall  be  finally  left  of  God. 
 
 4.  I  never  fhall  be  converted,  without y?rowg-<?r  conviSllonSy 
 and  greater  terrors  of  confcience. 
 
 5.  1  do  not  aim  at  the  glory  of  God  in  any  thing  I  do,  and 
 t^iercfore  I  cannot  hope  for  mercy, 
 
 Vv      1 
 
Mr    DAVID    B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  2% 
 
 6.  I  do  not  fee  the  evil  nature  of  /in,  nor  the  fin  of  my  na- 
 tare ;  and  therefore  I  am  difeouraged. 
 
 7.  The  more  I  firive,  the  more  W/'w*/ and  hard  my  heart  is, 
 and  the  worfe  I  grow  continually. 
 
 8.  I  fear  God  never  fiiewed  mercy  to  one  fo  vile  as  I. 
 9"  I  fear  I  am  not  ele^ed,  and  tnerefore  mufl  perifh. 
 10.  I  fear  the  day  of  grace  is  pafi  with  me. 
 
 I  £.  I  fear,  I  have  committed  the  unpardonable  fin. 
 
 12.  I  am  an  old  fmner;  and  if  God  had  defigned  mercy 
 for  me,  he  would  have  called  me  home  to  himfelf  before 
 now. 
 
 III.  Somtjigns  of  godlinefs. 
 
 The  diftinguiftiing  marks  of  a  true  Chrijtlan,  taken  from 
 fene  of  my  old  manufcripts;  where  I  wrote  as  I  felt  and  ex- 
 perienced,  and  not  from  any  confiderable  degree  of  doctrinal 
 knowledge,  or  acquaintance  with  the  fentiments  of  others  in 
 this  point. 
 
 1.   T  T  E  has  a  true  knowledge  of  the  glory  and  excellency 
 XjL  of  God,  that  he  is  moft  worthy  to  be  loved  and  prai- 
 (ed  for  his  own  divine  perfeftions.     Pfal.  cxlv.  3. 
 
 2.  God  is  his  portion,  Pfal.  Ixxiii.  25.  And  God's  glory, 
 his  great  concern,  Matth.  vi.  22. 
 
 3.  Hollnefs  is  his  delight ;  nothing  he  fo  much  longs  for,  as 
 to  be  holy,  as  God  is  holy.     Phil.  iii.  9. 12. 
 
 4.  Sin  is  his  greatefi  enemy.  This  he  hates,  for  its  own 
 nature,  for  what  it  is  in  itfclf,  being  contrary  to  a  holy  God, 
 Jer.  ii.  i.  And  confequently  he  hates  all  fin,  Rom.  vii.  24. 
 I  John  iii.  o. 
 
 5.  The  lavjs  of  God  alfo  are  his  delight,  Pfal.  cxix.  97. 
 Rom.  vii.  22.  Thefe  he  obferves,  not  out  of  conftraint, 
 from  a  fervile  fear  of  hell;  but  they  arc  his  choice,  Pfal.  cxix. 
 30.  The  firicfl  obfervance  of  them  is  not  his  bondage,  but 
 his  greateft  liberty,  verfc  45. 
 
 IV.  LETTERS, 
 
264  fHELIFEOF 
 
 IV.  LETTERS,  written  by  Mr  Braincrd  to  his 
 friends. 
 
 ADVERTISEMENT. 
 
 MR  Brainerd  had  a  large  acquaintance  and  corrcfpond- 
 encc,  efpecially  in  the  latter  part  of  his  life,  and  he 
 did  much  at  writing  letters  to  his  ablent  friends;  but  the 
 Hioft  of  his  acquaintance  living  at  a  great  diftance  from  me, 
 I  have  not  been  able  to  obtain  copies  of  many  that  he  wrote : 
 however,  the  greater  part  of  thofe  which.  I  have  feen,  arc 
 luch  as  appear  to  me  of  profitable  tendency,  and  woithy  of 
 the  public  view:  I  have  therefore  here  added  a  few  ot  his 
 letters. 
 
 N.  B.  Several  of-  thefe  which  follow,  are  not  publilhed  at 
 large,  becaufe  fome  parts  of  then;  were  concerning  particular 
 affairs  of  a  private  nature. 
 
 NO  I.  To  his  brother  John,  then  a  ftudent  at  Yale- college 
 in  New- Haven. 
 
 Dear  Brother,  Kaunaumeek,   April  30.  1 743. 
 
 I  Should  tell  you,  *'  I  long  to  fee  you,"  but  that  my  own 
 experience  has  taught  me,  there  is  no  happinefs,  and  ple- 
 nary fatisfaftion  to  be  enjoyed,  in  earthly  friends,  though  ever 
 fo  near  and  dear,  or  in  any  other  enjoyment,  that  is  not  God 
 himfelf.  Therefore,  if  the  God  cf  all  grace  would  be  pleafed 
 gracioully  to  afford  us  each  his  frejence  and  grace,  that  we 
 may  perform  the  work,  and  enduie  the  trials  he  calls  us  to, 
 in  a  mofl  diflrefTmg  tire  fome  wildernefs,  till  we  arrive  at  our 
 journey's  end ;  the  h'cal  diftance,  at  which  we  are  held  from 
 each  other  at  the  prefcnt,  is  a  matter  of  no  great  moment  or 
 importance  to  either  of  us.     But,  alas!  the  prefence  of  God 
 
 5s  what  I  want. 1  live  in  the  mofl  lonely  melancholy  de- 
 
 fert,  about  eighteen  miles  from  Albany  ;  (for  it  was  not  thought 
 befl  that  I  (hould  go  to  Delaware-river,  as  I  believe  I  hinted 
 to  you  in  a  letter  from  New- Yoi  k).  1  board  with  a  poor  Scotch- 
 man :  his  wife  can  talk  fcarce  any  Englifli.  My  diet  con- 
 fifls  moflly  of  hafly-pudding,  boiled  corn,  and  bread  baked 
 in  the  aflies,  and  fometimes  a  little  meat  and  butter.  My 
 lodging  is  a  little  heap  of  flraw,  laid  upon  fome  boards,  a 
 little  way  from  the  ground;  for  it  is  a  leg- room,  without  any 
 
 floor, 
 
Mr.     DAVID     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  265 
 
 floor,  that  I  lodge  in.  My  vjork  is  exceeding  inard  and  dif- 
 ficult :  I  travel  on  foot  a  mile  and  half,  the  worll  of  way, 
 almuft  daily,  and  back  again ;  for  I  live  fo  far  from  my  In- 
 dians.  1  have  not  feen  an  Engiifh   perfon  this  m.onth. — 
 
 Thefe  and  many  other  circumftances,  as  uncomfortable, 
 attend  me;  and  yet  my  fpir it ual  cor.fli^s  and  d'/flreJJ'cs  fo  far 
 exceed  Al  thefe,  that  I  fcarce  think  of  thea:,  or  hardly  mind 
 bat  that  I  am  entertained  in  the  mofl:  fumptuous  manner.  The 
 Lord  grant  that  I  may  learn  to  "  endure  hardnefs,  as  a  good 
 "  foldier  of  Jefus  Chrift  !"  As  to  my  fuccefs  here,  I  cannot 
 fay  much  as  yet :  the  Indians  feem  generally  kind,  and  well 
 difpofed  towards  me,  and  are  mollly  very  attentive  to  my  in- 
 ftru(flions,  and  feem  willing  to  be  taught  further :  two  or 
 three,  I  hope,  are  under  fome  convi^ions ;  but  there  feems 
 to  be  little  of  the  fpecial  workings  of  the  divine  Spirit  among 
 them  yet;  which  gives  me  many  a  heart-finking  hour.  Some- 
 times I  hope,  God  has  abundant  biefhngs  in  ftorc  for  them 
 and  me;  but  at  other  times  I  am  fo  overwhelmed  with  di- 
 ftrefs,  that  I  cannot  fee  how  his  dealings  with  me  are  confift- 
 cnt  with   covenant  love   and   iaithfulnefs,  and  Y  fay,  "  Sure- 
 
 "  ly  his  tender   mercies    are   clean  gone  for  ever." But 
 
 however,  I  fee,  I  needed  all  this  chajlifement  already  :  '•  It  is 
 *'  good  for  me,''  that  I  have  endured  thefe  trials,  and  have 
 hitherto  little  or  no  apparent  fuccefs.  Do  not  be  difcouraged 
 by  my  diftrefles :  I  was  under  great  diftrefs,  at  Mr  Pomroy's, 
 when  I  faw  you  laft;  but  *'  God  has  been  with  me  of  a 
 "  truth,"  fince  that :  he  helped  me  fometimes,  fweetly  at 
 Long-Ifland,  and  elfewherc.  But  let  us  always  remember, 
 that  we  m.uft  through  much  trlhulat'irjn  enter  into  God's  eter- 
 nal kingdom  of  refl  and  peace.  The  righteous  are  fcarcely 
 faved :  it  is  an  infinite  wonder,  that  we  have  well-grounded 
 hopes  of  being  faved  at  all.  For  my  part,  I  feel  the  moH: 
 vile  of  any  creature  living;  and  I  am  fure  fometimes,  there 
 
 is  not  fuch  another  exifdng  on  this  fide  hell. Now  all  you 
 
 can  do  for  me,  is,  to  pray  inceffantly,  that  God  would  make 
 me   humble,  holy,  refigned,   and  heavenly-minded,  by  all  my 
 
 trials. "  Be  ftrong  in  the   Lord,   and  in   the  povvcr  of 
 
 '^  his  might."  Let  us  f>«,  ivrefile,  and  fght,  that  we  may 
 win  the  prize,  and  obtain  that  complete  happinefs,  to  be 
 "  holy,  as  God  is  holy."  So,  wiAiing  and  praying  that  you 
 may  advance  in  learning  and  grace,  and  be  fit  for  fpecial  fer- 
 vice  for  God,  I  regain 
 
 Your  cife^ionate  brother, 
 
 David  Brainerd. 
 L  1  NO  2. 
 
266  THELlFEOr 
 
 NO  2.    To  his  brother   John,    at  Yale- college  in   New= 
 Haven. 
 
 Dear  brother,  Kaunaumeeh,  Dec.  27.  1743-' 
 
 I  Long  to  fee  you,  and  know  how  you  fare  in  your  journey 
 through  a  world  of  inexpreflible  forrow,  where  we  are 
 compafTed  about  with  "  vanity,  confufion,  and  vexation  of 
 '*  fpirit."  I  am  more  weary  of  life,  I  think,  than  ever  I  was. 
 The  whole  tyor/i appear?  to  me  like  a  huge  vacuum,  zvzHt  empty 
 fpace,  whence  nothing  defirable,  or  at  leaf!  fatisfadlory,  can 
 pofiibiy  be  derived  ;  and  I  long,  daily  to  die  more  and  more 
 to  it ;  even  though  I  obtain  not  that  comfort  from  fpiritual 
 things,  which  I  earneftly  defire.  JVorld'y  pleafures,  fuch  as 
 How  from  greatnefs,  riches,  honours,  and  fenfual  gratifica- 
 rions,  are  infinitely  worfs  than  none.  May  the  Lord  deliver 
 us  more  and  more  from  thefe  vanities  !  I  have  fpent  moft  of 
 the  fall  and  winter  hitherto  in  a  very  weak  ftate  of  body; 
 and  fometimes  under  prefling  inward  trials  and  fpiritual  con- 
 iiifts :  but  "  having  obtained  help  from  God,  1  continue  to 
 "  this  day ;"  and  am  now  fomething  better  in  health,  than 
 I  was  fometime  ago.  I  find  nothing  more  conducive  to  a  life 
 of  Chr-fiianity,  than  a  diligent,  induftrious,  and  faithful  im- 
 provement of  precious  time.  Let  us  then  faithfullj'  perform 
 that  bufinefs,  which  is  allotted  to  us  by  divine  providence,  to 
 the  utmoft  of  our  bodily  ftrength,  and  mental  vigour.  Why 
 fhould  we  fink,  and  grow  difcouraged,  with  any  particular 
 trials,  and  perplexities,  we  are  called  to  encounter  in  the  world? 
 death  zx\<\  eternity  arejuft  before  us;  a  few  tofiing  billows 
 more  will'  waft  us  into  the  world  of  fpirits,  and  we  hope 
 (through  infinite  grace)  into  endlefs  pleafures,  and  v^ninter- 
 rupted  refi:  and  peace.  Let  us  then  '*  run  with  patience  the 
 "  race  fet  before  us,"  Heb.  xii.  i  2.  And  Oh  that  we  could 
 depend   more  upon  the  living  God,  and  lefs  upon  our  own 
 
 wifdoni  and   ftrength! Dear  brother,  may  the  Gcd  of  all 
 
 grace  comfort  your  heart,  and  fucceed  your  fludies,  and 
 make  you  an  inftrument  of  good  to  his  people  in  your  day. 
 This  is  the  conftant  prayer  of 
 
 Tour  afftSlhnate  brother , 
 
 David  Erainerd, 
 
 N°3. 
 
Mr    DAVID     BRAINETvD.  i(>7 
 
 NO  3.  To  his  brother  Ifrael,   at  Haddam. 
 
 My  dear  brother,  Kaunaumeek,  January  11.  1743-4. 
 
 nr^  Here  is  but  one  thing,  that  delerves  our  higheft 
 
 JL  care  and  moft  ardent  dcfires  ;  and  that  is,  that  we 
 may  anfwer  the  great  end,  for  which  we  were  made,  viz.  to 
 glorify  that  God,  who  has  given  us  our  beings  and  all  our 
 comforts,  and  do  all  the^oo^  we  poflibly  can,  to  our  feUow- 
 men,  while  we  live  in  the  world:  and  verily  life  is  not  worth 
 the  having,  if  it  be  not  improved  for  this  noble  end  and  pur- 
 pofe.  Yet,  alas,  how  little  is  this  thought  of  among  man- 
 kind! Moft  men  feem  to  live  to  thentjelvesy  without  much  re- 
 gard -to  the  glory  of  God,  or  the  good  of  their  fellow-crea- 
 tures :  they  earneftly  defire,  and  eagerly  purfue  after  the 
 riches,  the  honours,  and  the  pleafures  of  life,  as  if  they  really 
 fuppofed,  that  wealth,  or  greatnefs,  or  mirriment,  could 
 make  their  immortal  fouls  happy.  But,  alas,  what  falfe  and 
 delufive  dreams  are  thefe!  And  how  miferable  will  thofe  ere 
 long  be,  who  are  not  awaked  out  of  them,  to  fee,  that  all 
 their  happinefs  confifts  in  living  to  God,  and  becoming  "holy, 
 "  as  he  is  holy !"  Oh,  may  you  never  fall  into  the  tempers 
 and  vanities,  the  fenfuality  and  folly  of  the  prefent  world  ! 
 You  are,  by  divine  providence,  left  as  it  were  alone  in  a  wide 
 world,  to  a(fl:  for  yourfelf :  be  fure  then  to  remember,  it  is  a 
 world  of  temptation.  You  have  no  earthly  parents  to  be  the 
 means  of  forming  your  youth  to  piety  and  virtue,  by  their 
 pious  examples,  and  feaionable  counfels ;  let  this  then  excite 
 you  with  greater  diligence  and  fervency  to  look  up  to  the  Fa- 
 ther of  mercies  for  grace  and  affiftance  againft  all  the  vanities 
 of  the  world.  And  if  you  would  glorify  God,  anfwer  his  juft 
 expeftations  from  you,  and  make  your  own  foul  happy  in 
 this  and  the  coming  world,  obferve  thefe  few  directions; 
 though  not  from  a  father,  yet  from  a  brother  who  is  touched 
 with  a  tender  concern  for  your  prefent  and  future  happinefs. 
 And, 
 
 Firft,  Refolve  upon,  and  daily  endeavour  to  praclife  a  life 
 of fe?'ioufnefs  znd  iAnCz  fobriety.  The  wlic  man  will  tell  you 
 the  great  advantage  of  fuch  a  life,  Eccl.  vii.  3.  Think  of  the 
 life  of  Chrift ;  and  when  you  can  find  that  he  was  pleafed  with 
 jefting  and  vain  merriment,  then  you  mav  indulge  it  in  your- 
 felf. 
 
 Again,  Be  careful  to  make  a  good  improvement  of  precious 
 time.     When  you  ccafe  from  labour,  fill  up  your   time   in 
 
 L  1  2  reading, 
 
26$  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F 
 
 reading,  meditation,  and  pr  lyer :  and  while  your  hands  are 
 labouring,  let  your  heart  be  en^iployed,  as  much  as  pofTiblc, 
 in  divine  thoughts. 
 
 Further,  Take  heed  that  you  faithfully  perform  the  bifi- 
 nefs  you  have  to  do  in  the  world,  from  a  regard  to  the  com- 
 martds  of  God;  and  not  from  an  ambitious  defire  of  being  e- 
 lleemed  better  than  others.  We  fhould  always  look  upon 
 ourfclves  as  God's  fervants,  placed  in  God's  woild,  to  do  his 
 work  ;  and  accordingly  labour  faithfully  for  hmi ;  not  with  a 
 defign  to  grow  rich  and  great,  but  to  glorify  God,  and  do  all 
 the  good  we  poJfTibly  can. 
 
 i^gain,  Never  expe<n:  zny  fatisfa^ion  or  happinefs  from  the 
 1V0/U.  If  you  hope  for  happinels  in  the  world,  hope  for  it 
 from  God,  and  not  from  the  world.  Do  not  think  you  fhall 
 be  more  happy,  if  you  live  to  fuch  or  fuch  a  ftate  of  life,  if 
 yon  live  to  be  for  yourfelf,  to  be  fettled  in  the  world,  or  if 
 ybn  fhould  gain  an  eflate  in  it :  but  look  upon  it  that  you 
 ihall  then  be  happy,  when  you  can  be  conftantly  employed  for 
 God,  and  not  for  yourfelf;  and  defire  to  live  in  this  world, 
 only  to  do  and  fiff'er  what  God  allots  to  you.  When  you 
 can  be  of  the  fpiiit  and  temper  of  angels,  who  are  willing  tq 
 <  ome  down  into  this  lower  world,  to  perform  what  God  com- 
 mands them,  though  their  defires  are  heavenly,  and  not  in  the 
 kaft  fet  on  earthly  things,  then  you  will  be  of  that  teuiper 
 that  you  ought  to  have,    Col.  iii.  2. 
 
 Once  more.  Never  think  that  you  can  live  to  God  by  yrmr 
 mvn  power  or  iirength  ;  but  always  look  to,  and  rely  on  h:m 
 for  affiftance,  yea,  for  all  ftrength  and  grace.  T  here  is  no 
 greater  truth  than  this,  that  "  we  can  do  nothing  of  our- 
 *'  felves,"  John  xv.  5.  and  2  Cor.  iii.  5. ;  yet  nothing  but 
 our  own  experience  can  efFeftually  teach  it  £0  us.  Indeed  wc 
 are  a  long  time  in  learning,  that  all  our  ftrength  and  falva- 
 tion  is  in  God.  This  is  a  life,  that  I  think  no  unconverted 
 man  can  poifibly  live  ;  and  yet  it  is  a  life  that  ex  try  godly  foul 
 15  preffing  after,  in  fome  good  meafure.  Let  it  then  be  your 
 great  concern,  thus  to  devote  yourfelf  and  your  all  to  God. 
 
 I  long  to  fee  you,  that  I  may  fay  much  more  to  you  than 
 I  now  can,  for  your  benefit  and  welfare  ;  hut  I  defire  to  com- 
 mit you  to,  and  leave  you  with  the  Father  cf  mercies,  and 
 God  of  all  grace ;  praying  that  you  may  be  uiredted  fafely 
 through  an  evil  world,  to  God's  heavenly  kingdom. 
 
 I  avi  your  aj^e£}ionate  loving  brother,   , 
 
 DrviD  Brainerd. 
 
 NO/,. 
 
Mr    DAVID     BRAINERD.  269 
 
 NO  4.  To  a  fpccial  friend. 
 
 The  Forks  of  Delavjare,  July  31.  1744. 
 ■  £^  Ertainly  the  greateft,  the  nobleft  pleafure  of 
 V»>  intelligent  creatures  muft  refult  from  their  ac- 
 quaintance with  the  blefTed  God,  and  with  their  own  rational 
 and  immortal  fouls.  And  Oh,  how  divinely  fweet  and  en- 
 tertaining is  it,  to  look  into  our  own  fouh,  when  we  can 
 find  all  our  powers  and  paffions  united  and  engaged  in  pur- 
 fuit  after  God,  our  whole  fouls  longing  and  pafTionately 
 breathing  after  a  conformity  to  him,  and  the  full  enjoyment 
 of  him!  Verily  there  are  no  hours  pafs  away  with  fo  much 
 divine  pleafure,  as  thofe  that  are  fpent  in  communing  with 
 God  and  our  own  hearts.  Oh,  how  fweet  is  a  fpirit  of  de- 
 votion, a  fpirit  of  fcrioufnefs  and  divine  folemnity,  a  fpirit  of 
 gofpel  fimplicity,  love,  tendernefs!  Oh,  how  defirable,  and 
 how  profitable  to  the  Chriilian  life,  is  a  fpirit  of  holy  watch- 
 fulnef^,  and  godly  jealoufy  over  ourfelves;  when  our  fouls 
 are  afraid  of  nothing  fo  much  as  that  we  ihall  grieve  and 
 offend  the  bleffed  God,  whom  at  fuch  times  we  apprehend, 
 or  at  leafl  hope,  to  be  a  father  and  friend;  whom  we  then 
 love  and  long  to  pleafe,  rather  than  to  be  happy  ourfelves, 
 or  at  leaft  we  delight  to  derive  our  happinefs /rom  pleafing  and 
 glorifying  him !  Surely  this  is  a  pious  temper,  worthy  of 
 the  highcft  ambition  and  clofefl  purfuit  of  intelligent  crea- 
 tures and  holy  Chriftians.  Oh,  how  vaflly  fuperiour  is  the 
 pleafure,  peace,  and  fatisfaftion  derived  from  thefe  divine 
 frames,  to  that  which  we  (alas !)  fometimes  purfue  in  things 
 impertinent  and  trifling !  our  own  bitter  experience  teaches 
 us,  that  "  in  the  midfl:  of  fuch  laughter  the  heart  is  forrow- 
 "  ful,"  and  there  is  no  true  fatisfaftion  but  in  God.  But, 
 alas!  how  (hall  we  obtain  and  retain  this  fweet  fpirit  of  re- 
 ligion and  devotion  ?  Let  us  follow  the  apoftle's  dire£\ion, 
 Phil.  ii.  12.  and  labour  upon  the  wcouragement  he  there 
 mentions,  verf  13.  for  it  is  God  only  can  afford  us  this  fa- 
 vour ;  and  he  will  be  foueht  tOy  and  it  is  fit  we  fhould  wait 
 upon  him  for  fo  rich  a  mercy.  Oh,  m^^.y  the  God  of  all  grace 
 afford  us  the  grace  and  influences  of  his  divine  Spirit ;  and 
 help  us  that  \vc  may  from  our  hearts  cfleem  it  our  greateft 
 liberty  and  happinefs,  that  "  whether  we  live,  we  may  live  to 
 *'  the  Lord,  or  whether  we  die,  we  may  die  to  the  Lord;" 
 that  in  life  and  death ^  we  may  be  his! 
 
 1  am  in  a  very  poor  (late  of  health ;  T  think,  fcarce  ever 
 
 poorer : 
 
Q.70  THELIFEOF 
 
 poorer:  but,  through  divine  goodnefs,  I  am  not  difcontent- 
 cd  under  my  vveakncfs,  and  confinement  to  this  wildernefs : 
 I  blefs  God  for  this  retirement:  I  never  was  more  thank- 
 ful for  any  thing,  than  I  have  been  of  late  for  the  nc- 
 cellity  I  am  under  of  felf  denial  in  many  refpe^s  :  I  love  to 
 be  z pilgrim  and /Iranger  in  this  wildernefs  :  it  feems  moft  fit 
 for  fuch  a  poor  ignorant,  worthlefs,  defpifcd  creature  as  I. 
 1  would  not  change  ray  prefent  mijfion  for  any  other  bufmefs 
 in  the  whole  world.  I  may  tell  you  freely,  without  vanity 
 and  oflentation,  God  has  of  late  given  me  great  freedom  and 
 fervency  in  prayer,  when  I  have  been  fo  weak  and  feeble, 
 my  nature  feemed  as  if  it  would  fpecdily  difiblve.  I  feel  as 
 if  my  all  was  loft,  and  I  was  undone  for  this  world,  if  the 
 poor  Heathen  may  not  be  converted.  I  feel,  in  general, 
 difFercnt  from  what  I  did,  when  I  faw  you  laft ;  at  leaft  more 
 crucifed  to  all  the  enjoyments  of  life.  It  would  be  very  re- 
 fre(hing  to  me,  to  fee  you  here  in  this  defart ;  efpecially  in 
 my  weak  difconfolaie  hours :  but,  I  think,  I  could  be  con- 
 tent never  to  fee  you,  or  any  of  my  friends  again  in  this 
 world,  if  God  would  blefs  my  labours  here  to  the  converfion 
 of  the  poor  Indians. 
 
 I  have  much  that  I  could  willingly  communicate  to  you, 
 which  I  muft  omit,  till  Providence  gives  us  leave  to  fee  each 
 other.     In  the  mean  time,  I  reft 
 
 Your  obliged  friend  and  fervanty 
 
 David  Brainerd, 
 
 Ko  5.  To  a  fpecial  friend,  a  minifter  of  the  gofpel  in   New- 
 Jerfey. 
 
 The  Forks  of  Delaivare,  Dec.  24.  1744. 
 Rev.  and  dear  brother. 
 
 Have  little   to   fay  to  you,  about  fpiritual  joys,  and 
 thofe    bleffed   refrejhments,    and  divine   confolationsy 
 
 xvith  which  I  have  been  much  favoured  in  times  paft  :  but  this 
 I  can  tell  you,  that  if  I  gain  experience  in  no  other  point,  yet 
 I  am  fure  I  do  in  this,  viz.  that  the  prefent  world  has  nothing 
 in  it  to  fatisfy  an  immortal  foul ;  and  hence,  that  it  is  not  to  be 
 defredfor  itfelf,  but  only  becaufe  God  may  hefeen  and  Jerved 
 in  it :  and  I  wifii  I  could  be  more  patient  and  willing  to  live 
 in  it  for  this  end,  than  I  can  ufually  find  myfelf  to  be.  It 
 is  no  virtue,  I  know,  to  defire  death,  only  to  be  freed  from 
 
 the 
 
Mr     DAVID     BRAINERD.  lyi 
 
 the  miferies  of  life  :  but  I  want  that  divine  hope,  which  you 
 obferved,  when  I  faw  you  laft,  was  the  very  linews  of  vital 
 religion.  Earth  can  do  us  no  good,  and  if  tliere  be  no  hope  of 
 our  doing  good  on  earth,  how  can  we  defire  to  live  in  it?  And 
 yet  we  ouirht  to  defire,  or  at  leaft  to  be  refigned,  to  tarry  in 
 it;  becaufe  it  is  the  will  of  our  all- wife  Sovereign.  But 
 perhaps  thefe  thoughts  will  appear  melancholy  and  gloomy, 
 and  confequently  will  be  very  undefirable  to  you  ;  and  there- 
 fore I  forbear  to  add.  I  wiHi  you  may  not  read  them  in  the 
 fame  circumftances  in  which  I  write  them.  I  have  a  little 
 more  to  d-)  andfuffier  in  a  dark  difconfolate  world  ;  and   then 
 
 I  hope  to  be  as  happy  as   you   are. 1    fliould   alk   you   to 
 
 pray  for  me,  were  I  worth  your  cjncern.  May  the  Lord 
 enable  us  bith  to  *'  endure  hardnefs  as  good  foldiers  of 
 "  Jefus  Chnft;"  and  may  we  "  obtain  mercy  of  God  to  be 
 *'  faithful,  to  the  death,"  in  the  difcharge  of  our  refpeclive 
 trufls  i 
 
 /  am  your  very  unworthy  brother, 
 
 and  humble  ferv ant, 
 
 David  Braineri>» 
 
 NO  6.  To  his  brother  John,  at  college. 
 
 Crofweekfung,  in  New-Jerfey,  Dec.  2S.  1745. 
 
 Fery  dear  brother, 
 
 " 1"  Am  in  one  continued,  perpetual,  and  uninterrupted 
 
 X  hurry  ;  and  divine  providence  throws  fo  much  upon 
 me,  that  I  do  not  fee  it  will  ever  be  otherwife.  May  I  *'  ob- 
 *'  tain  mercy  of  God  to  be  faithful  to  the  death  !"  I  can- 
 not fay,  I  am  weary  of  my  hurry ;  I  only  want  flrength 
 and  grace  to  do  more  for  God,  than  I  have  ever  yet  done. 
 
 My  dear  brother ;  The  Lord  of  heaven,  that  has  carried 
 me  through  many  trials,  blefs  you;  blefs  you  for  time, 
 and  eternity  ;  and  lit  you  to  do  fervice  for  him  in  his  church  be- 
 low, and  to  enjoy  his  blifsful  prefence  in  his  church  triumph- 
 ant. My  brother;  "  the  time  is  fhort :"  Oh  let  us  fill  it  up 
 for  God;  let  us  "count  the  fuiferings  of  this  prefent  time" 
 as  nothing,  if  we  can  but  "  run  our  race,  and  finifh  our 
 "  courfe  with  joy."  Oh,  let  us  flrive  to  live  to  God.  I 
 blefs  the  Lord,  i  have  nothing  to  d  >  with  earth,  but  only  to 
 labour  honcftly  in  it  for  God,  till  I  fliall  "  accomplilh  as  an 
 ^  hireling  my  day."     I  think,  I  do  not  defire  to  live  one 
 
 minute 
 
27«  THELIFEOF 
 
 minute  for  any  thing  that  earth  can  affjid.     Oh,  that  I  could 
 live  for  none  but  God,  till  my  dying  moment! 
 
 7  am  your  affcSil'.natc  hrotheVf 
 
 David  Brainerd. 
 
 N°  7.  To  his  brother  Ifrael,  then  a  ftudent  at  Yale-college 
 in  New-Haven. 
 
 Elifabeth'To'wnf  Nevj-Jerfey,  Nov.  24.  1746. 
 Dear  brother, 
 
 I  Had  determined  to  make  you  and  my  other  friends  in 
 New-England  a  vilit,  this  fall;  partly  from  an  earncft  de- 
 fire  I  had  to  fee  you  and  them,  and  partly  with  a  view  to  the 
 recovery  of  my  health ;  which  has,  for  more  than  three 
 months  part,  been  much  impaired.  And  in  order  to  profe- 
 cute  this  dcfign,  I  fet  out  from  my  own  people  about  three 
 weeks  ago,  and  came  as  far  as  to  this  place ;  where,  my  dif- 
 order  greatly  increafing,  I  have  been  obliged  to  keep  houfe 
 ever  fmce,  until  the  day  before  yefterday  ;  at  which  time,  I 
 was  able  to  ride  about  half  a  mile,  but  found  myfelf  much 
 tired  with  the  journey.  I  have  now  no  hopes  of  profecuting 
 ray  journey  into  New- England  this  winter,  fuppofing,  my 
 prefent  (late  of  health  will  by  no  means  admit  of  it :  although 
 I  am  through  divine  goodnefs  much  better  than  I  was  fomc 
 days  ago,  yet  I  have  not  ftrength  now  to  ride  more  than  ten 
 miles  a  day,  if  the  feafon  were  warm,  and  fit  for  me  to  travel 
 in.  My  diforder  has  been  attended  with  feveral  fymptoms  of 
 a  confuniptinn ;  and  I  have  been  at  times  apprehenlive,  that 
 my  great  chancre  was  at  hand:  yet  blelTed  be  God,  I  have 
 never  been  afiiighted ;  but,  on  the  contrary,  at  fome  times 
 much  deUghted  with  a  view  of  its  approach.  Oh,  the  bleffed- 
 liefs  of  being  delivered  from  the  clegs  of  flefh  and  fenfe,  from 
 z  body  fjf  Jin  and  fpiritual  death!  Oh,  the  unfpeakable  fweet- 
 nch  of  being  tranlhtcd  into  a  ftate  of  complete  purity  and 
 perfefiion !  believe  me,  my  brother,  a  lively  view  and  hope 
 of  thefe  things,  will  m^ke  the  king  of  terrors  himfelf  appear 
 agreeable. Dear  bri-ther,  let  me  intreat  you,  to  keep  eter- 
 nity in  your  view,  and  behave  yourfelf  as  becomes  one  that 
 muft  fiiortly  "  give  an  account  uf  all  things  done  in  the  body.'* 
 That  God  may  be  your  God,  and  prepare  you  for  his  fervice 
 here,  and  his  kingdom  of  glory  hereafter,  is  the  defire  and 
 daily  prayer  of 
 
 Tcur  affcdihnate  loving  brother, 
 
 David  Brainerd. 
 
 NO  8. 
 
Mr    DAVID     BRAINERD.  273 
 
 N"^  8.  To  his  brother  Ifrael,  at  college;  w  Itren  ia  t'-e 
 time  of  his  extreme  ilinefs  in  Bolton,  a  tew  moutiis  bctoie 
 hh  death. 
 
 My  dear  brother,  .      Bfion,  June  30.   J  747. 
 
 Ir  is  froin  the  fides  of  etern'ty  I  n  av  ^Jirefa  you.  I  am 
 heartily  forry,  that  I  have  1  j  little  ftrength  to  write  what 
 I  long  io  much  to  communicate  to  you.  But  let  me  tell  you, 
 my  brother,  eternity  is  another  thing  than  we  orJinarily  take 
 it  to  be  in  a  healthful  ftate.  Oh,  how  vaft  and  boundleli. ! 
 Oh,  how  fixed  and  unalterable!  Oh,  of  what  infiiite  import- 
 ance is  it,  that  we  be  prepared  for  etern'ty/  1  have  b,^en  jufk 
 a  dying,  now  for  more  than  a  week  ;  and  all  around  me  have 
 thought  me  {o :  but  in  this  time  I  have  had  clear  views  of  e- 
 ternity ;  have  feen  the  blefFednefs  of  xho  godiy,  in  fome  mea- 
 fure;  and  have  longed  to  fhare  their  happy  Itate ;  as  well  as 
 been  comfortably  fatisfied,  that  through  grace,  I  iliall  do  fo : 
 but  Oh,  what  anguiHi  is  raifed  in  my  mind,  to  think  of  an 
 eternity  for  thofe  who  are  Chr  filefs,  for  thofe  who  are  mif- 
 taken,  and  who  bring  their  talfe  hupes  to  the  grave  with 
 them !  The  light  was  fo  dreadful,  I  could  by  no  means  bear 
 it :  my  thoughts  recoiled,  and  I  faid,  (but  under  a  more  affcdl- 
 ing  fenfe  than  ever  before),  "Who  can  dwell  with  evcrlafling 
 "burnings!"  Oh,  methought,  that  I  could  now  fee  my 
 friends,  that  I  might  warn  them,  to  fee  to  it,  they  lay  their 
 foundation  for  eternity  fure.  And  you,  ny  dear  brother,  I 
 have  been  particularly  oncerned  for;  and  have  wondered,  I 
 fo  much  neglefled  converling  with  you  ab  >ut  your  fpiritual 
 flate  at  our  lafl  meeting.  Oh,  my  brother,  Ut  nje  then  beieech 
 you  now  to  examine,  whether  you  are  indeed  ineiv  creature? 
 whether  you  have  ever  acted  sbivtfe'f?  whether  xhc  glory  of 
 God  has  ever  been  the  fweeteft  highefl:  concern  with  you? 
 whether  you  have  ever  been  reconcileJ  to  all  the  perfefti^.ns 
 of  God?  in  a  word,  whether -God  has  been  your  p-^rtlon,  and 
 iihoXy  c^tnformity  to  him  your  chief  delight?  If  you  cannv.t 
 anfvver  pofitively,  confidcr  ferioufly  the  frequent  breatl  ings  of 
 your  foul :  but  do  not  however  put  your  (elf  off  wih  a  flight  an- 
 fwer.  If  you  have  reafon  to  think  you  arc  prccelejs,  Oh  give 
 yourfelf  and  the-  throne  of  grace  no  reft,  till  God  arife  and 
 fave.  But  if  the  cafe  (hould  be  otherwifc,  blcfo  Gcd  for  his 
 grace,  and  prefs  after  holinefs  *. 
 
 *  Mr  Brainerd  afterwards  had  greater  fatiffavflion  concerning 
 the  ftate  of  his  brother's  foul,  by  much  opportunity  of  converfaiioa 
 with  him  before  his  death. 
 
 M  m  My 
 
174  THE     LIFE     OF 
 
 My  foul  longs,  that  you  fhould  be  fitted  for,  and  in  due 
 time  go  into  the  work  of  the  min-flry.  I  cannot  bear  to 
 think  of  your  going  into  any  other  bulincfs  in  life.  Do  not 
 be  difcouraged,  bccaufe  you  fee  your  elder  brothers  in  the  mi- 
 niftry  die  early y  one  after  another :  I  declare,  now  I  am  dying, 
 I  would  not  have  fpent  my  life  oiheriv'je  for  the  whole  world. 
 But  I  mull  leave  this  with  God. 
 
 If  this  line  fhould  come  to  your  hands  foon  after  the  date, 
 I  fliould  he  almoft  defirous  you  fiiould  fet  out  on  a  journey 
 to  me  :  it  may  be,  you  may  fee  me  alive  ;  which  I  fhould 
 much  rejoice  in.  But  if  you  cannot  come,  I  muft  commit 
 you  to  the  grace  of  God,  where  you  are.  May  he  be  your 
 guide  and  counfellor,  your  fan6l;fier  and  eternal  portion  ! 
 
 Oh,  my  dear  brother,  flee  fleOTily  lufis,  and  the  inchanting 
 amufements,  as  well  as  corrupt  douirlnes  of  the  prcfent  day  ; 
 and  flrive  to  live  to  Cod.     Take  this  as  the  lajl  line  from 
 
 Tour  affe6iionate  dying  brother, 
 
 Davii>  Bratnerd. 
 
 ti^  9.  To  a  young  gentleman,  a  candidate  for  the  work 
 of  the  min''/lry,  for  whom  he  had  a  fpecial  friendfhip ;  alfo 
 written  at  the  fame  time  of  his  great  illnefs  and  iiearnefs  to 
 death  in  Bofton. 
 
 Very  dear  Sir, 
 
 HO  W  amazing  it  is,  that  the  living  who  know  they  mufl 
 die,  fhould  notwithflanding  "put  far  away  the  evil 
 "  day,"  in  a  feafon  of  health  and  profperity  ;  and  live  at  fuch 
 an  awful  diflance  from  a  familiarity  with  the  grave,  and  the 
 great  concerns  beyond  it!  and  efpecially  it  may  juftly  fill  us 
 with  furprife,  that  any  whofe  minds  have  been  divinely  enlight- 
 ened, to  behold  the  important  things  of  eternity  as  they  are, 
 I  fay,  that  fuch  fhould  live  in  this  manner.  And  yet.  Sir, 
 how  frequently  is  this  the  cafe?  how  rare  are  the  inflances  of 
 thofe  who  live  and  acf^,  from  day  to  day,  as  on  the  verge  of 
 eternity ;  ftriving  to  fill  up  all  their  remaining  moments,  in 
 the  fervice,  and  to  the  honour  of  their  great  Majler?  We  in- 
 fcnfibly  trifle  away  time,  while  we  feem  to  have  enough  of 
 it;  and  are  fo  flrangdy  amufed,  as  in  a  great  meafure  to  lofe 
 a  fenfe  of  the  hoUnefs  and  blefled  qualifications  neceffary  to 
 prepare  us  to  be  inhabitants  of  the  heavenly  paradife.  But 
 Ob,  dear  Sir,  a  dyinpr  bed,  if  we  enjoy  our  rcafon  clearly, 
 
 wiU 
 
M  R    D  A  V  I  D     B  R  A  I  N  E  R  D.  275 
 
 win  give  another  view  of  things.  I  have  now,  for  more  than 
 three  weeks,  lain  under  the  greateft  degree  of  weaknefs ;  the 
 greater  part  of  the  time,  expe6ling  daily  and  hourly  to  enter 
 into  the  etexnal  world :  fometimes  have  been  fo  far  gone,  as 
 to  be  wholly  fpeechlefs,  for  fome  hours  together.  And  Oh, 
 of  what  vaft  importance  has  a  holy  fpirituai /y^"  appeared  to 
 me  to  be  in  this  feafon !  I  have  longed  to  call  upon  all  my 
 friends,  to  make  it  their  bufinefs  to  live  to  Cod ;  and  especial- 
 ly all  that  are  defigned  for,  or  engaged  in  the  fervice  of  the 
 fan£luary.  O  dear  Sir,  do  not  think  it  enough,  to  live  at  the 
 rate  of  commrm  Chr'ftians.  Alas,  to  how  little  purpofe  do 
 they  often  converfe,  when  they  meet  together !  I'he  vifilSy 
 even  of  thofc  who  are  called  Chriflians  indeed,  are  frequently 
 extreme  barren;  and  confcience  cannot  but  condemn  us  for 
 the  miftmprovement  of  time,  while  v/e  have  been  converfant 
 with  them.  Bat  the  way  to  enjoy  the  divine  prefcnce,  and  be 
 fitted  for  diftinguifhing  fervice  for  God,  is  to  live  a  life  of 
 great  devotion  and  confiant  ft  If- de  die  at  ion  to  him  ;  cbferving 
 the  motions  and  difpofitions  of  our  own  hearts,  whence  wc 
 may  learn  the  corruptions  that  lodge  there,  and  our  conftant 
 need  of  help  from  God  for  the  performance  of  the  leaft  duty. 
 And  Oh,  dear  Sir,  let  me  befeech  you  frequently  to  attend 
 the  great  and  precious  duties  o^fecret  fajiing  and  prayer. 
 
 I  have  a  fecret  thought,  from  fome  things  1  have  obferved, 
 that  God  may  perhaps  defign  you  for  fome  fingular  fervice  in 
 the  world.  Oh  then  labour  to  be  prepared  and  qualified  to 
 do  much  for  God.  Read  Mr  Edwards's  piece  on  the  ^Jfec- 
 tions,  again  and  again  ;  and  labour  to  dift'nguijh  clearly  upon 
 experiences  and  affc6lions  in  religion,  that  you  may  make  a 
 difference  between  the  ^oW  and  the  fliining  ^rc/}  ;  1  fay,  la- 
 bour here,  as  ever  you  ^would  be  an  nfeful  minijler  of  Chrift : 
 for  nothing  has  put  fuch  a  flop  to  the  work  of  God  in  the 
 late  day  as  the  falfe  rehgion,  the  wild  affections  that  attend  it. 
 Suffer  me  therefore,  liaally,  to  intreat  you  carneftly  to  "  give 
 "  yourfelf  to  prayer,  to  reading  and  meditation"  on  divine 
 truths  :  flrive  to  penetrate  to  the  bottom  of  t'nem,  and  never 
 be  content  with  a  fuperficial  knowledge.  By  this  means, 
 your  thoughts  will  gradually  grow  weighty  and  judicious ;  and 
 you  hereby  will  be  poffeffed  of  a  valuable  treajure,  out  of 
 which  you  may  produce  "  things  new  and  old,"  to  the  glory 
 of  God. 
 
 And  now,  "  I  commend  5'ou  to  the  grace  of  God;"  ear- 
 iielcly  defiring,  that  a  plentiful  portion  of  the  divine  Spirit 
 may   reft   upon    you ;    that    you  may  live   to  God  in  every 
 
 M  m  2  capacity 
 
276  THELlFEOr 
 
 capacity  of  life,  and  do  abundant  fervice  for  him  In  a  public ^ 
 if  it  be  his  will ;  and  that  you  may  be  richly  qualified  for  the 
 *'  inheritance  of  the  faints  in  light.'* 
 
 I  fcarcc  expecfl  to  fee  your  face  any  more  in  the  body ;  and 
 therefore  intreat  you  to  accept  this  as  the  lafl  token  of  love, 
 from 
 
 Y'lur  Jincerely  affe£iionate  dying  friend ^ 
 
 David  Brainerd. 
 
 P.S.  I  am  now,  at  the  dating  of  this  letter,  confiderably 
 recovered  from  what  I  was  when  I  wrote  it ;  it  having  lain  by 
 me  fome  rime,  for  want  of  an  opportunity  of  conveyance  j 
 
 i:  was  written  in  Bofton. 1  am  now  able  to  ride  a  little, 
 
 a  id  fo  am  removed  into  the  country :  but  I  have  no  more 
 expectation  of  recovering,  than  when  I  wrote,  though  I  am 
 a  little  better  for  the  prefent;  and  therefore  1  (till  fubfcribe 
 myleii, 
 
 Xqut  dying  friend,  &c. 
 
 D.  B. 
 
 NO  10.  To  his  brother  John,  at  Bethel,  the  town  of 
 Chnfiian  Indians  in  New  Jerfey;  written  likewife  at  Boflon, 
 when  he  was  there  on  the  brink  of  the  grave,  in  the  fummef 
 before  his  death. 
 
 Dear  brother, 
 
 I  Am  now  juft  on  the  verge  of  eternity,  expe^Ing  very 
 fpeedily  to  appear  in  the  unfeen  world.  I  teel  myfelf 
 no  more  an  inhabitant  of  earth,  and  fometimes  earncftly  long 
 to  "  depart  and  be  with  Chrift."  I  blefs  God,  he  has  for  fome 
 years  given  me  an  abiding  conviftion,  that  it  is  impofTiblc  for 
 any  rational  creature  to  enjoy  true  happinefs  without  being 
 entirely  "  devoted  to  him."  Under  the  influence  of  this  con* 
 viction  I  have  in  fome  meafure  afted ;  Oh  that  1  had  done 
 m  )re  fo  !  I  faw  both  the  excellency  and  neccffity  of  holinefs 
 ia  life;  but  never  in  fuch  a  manner  as  now,  when  I  am  juft 
 brought  to  the  fides  of  the  grave.  Oh,  my  brother,  purfue 
 after  hrAinefs ;  pref?  towards  this  bleffed  mark;  and  let  your 
 t'lirfly  (oul  continually  fey,  "  1  fliall  never  be  fatisfied  till 
 *'  I  awake  in  thy  likenels."  Although  there  has  been  a  great 
 d^al  of /.^//yZwi^  in  my  views;  of  which  I  am  afhamed,  ?nd 
 for  which  my  fdul  is  humbled  at  every  view:  yet  blefTed  be 
 Godj  I  find  I  have  really  bad,  for  the  moft  part,  fuch  a  cen- 
 
 ccrp 
 
Mr    DAVID     BRAINERD.  277 
 
 eern  for  h'S  glory,  and  the  advancement  of  his  kingdom  in 
 the  world,  that  it  is  a  iatisfadlion  to  me  to  relieft  upon  thefe 
 years. 
 
 '  And  now,  my  dear  brother,  as  I  muft  prefs  you  to  purfue 
 zhtx  pe/fonal  holinefs,  to  be  as  much  'vss  fufing  and  prayer  as 
 your  health  will  allow,  and  x.o  live  above  the  rate  of  common 
 Chriji'ians ;  fo  I  muft  intreat  you  folemnly  to  attend  to  your 
 public  \ior\i:  labour  to  diftinguifli  between  true  and /k/^  re- 
 ligion :  and  to  that  end,  watch  the  motions  of  God'b  Spirit 
 upon  your  own  heart ;  look  to  him  for  help  ;  and  impai  tidily 
 compare  your  experiences  with  his  luord.  Read  Mr  Ldwards 
 ©n  the  affe6lions,'  where  the  efience  and  foul  of  religion  is 
 clearly  diftinguiflied  from  falfe  affections  *.  Value  religious 
 Joyx  according  to  xhtfubje ^-matter  of  them:  there  are  many 
 that  rejoice  in  their  i'uppoi'edjif/lijication;  but  what  do  thefe 
 joys  argue,  but  only  that  they  love  themfelves  ?  Whereas, 
 in  true  fpiritual  joys,  the  foul  rejoices  in  God  for  what  he 
 IS  in  hlrnfelf ;  blefles  God  for  his  holineG,  fovereignty,  power, 
 faithfulnels,  and  all  his  perfeftions ;  adores  God,  that  he  is 
 what  he  is,  that  he  is  unchangeably  poffeffed  of  infinite  glory 
 
 *  I  had  at  firft  fully  intended,  in  publ'fhing  this  and  the  fore- 
 going letters,  to  have  fuppreffed  thefe  paffages  wherein  viy  name  is 
 mentioned,  Sind  my  difcourfs  on  religious  affefiions  recommended: 
 and  am  fenfible,  that  by  my  doing  otherwife,  1  fhall  bring  upon 
 me  the  reproach  of  fome.  But  how  much  foe^er  I  may  be  pleafed 
 with  the  commendation  of  any  performance  of  mine,  ^and  I  confefs, 
 I  efteem  the  judgment  and  approbation  of  fuch  a  perfon  as  Mr  Brain- 
 erd,  worthy  to  be  valued,  and  look  on  myfelf  as  highly  honoured 
 by  it),  yet  I  can  trulv  fay,  the  things  that  governed  me  in  altering 
 my  forementioned  determination,  with  refpedl  to  thefe  paiTagts, 
 were  thefe  two.  (i  )  What  Mr  Brainerd  here  fays  of  that  dif- 
 courfe,  (hews  very  fully  and  particularly  what  his  notions  were  of 
 experimental  religion,  and  the  nature  of  true  piety  and  how  far 
 he  was  from  placing  it  in  imprffli  >ns  on  the  imagination,  or  any  en- 
 thufiaftical  impulfes,  and  how  tfTcntial  in  religion  he  eileempd  holy 
 practice,  <bc.  <bc  For  all  that  have  read  that  difcourfe,  know  what 
 fentiments  are  there  exprefTed  concerning  thefe  things.  (?.)  I  jud- 
 ged, that  the  approbation  of  fo  apparent  and  eminent  a  friend  and 
 example  of  inward  vital  religion,  and  evangelical  piety  in  the 
 height  of  it,  would  probably  tend  to  make  that /;(7<?/t  more  fervice- 
 able  ;  efpecialiy  among  fome  kinds  of  zealous  perfons,  whofe  be- 
 nefit was  efpecialiy  aimed  at  in  the  book;  fome  of  which  are  pre- 
 judiced againft  it,  as  written  in  too  legal  a  ftrain,  and  oppofing  fome 
 things  wherein  the  height  of  Chriflian  experience  confifts,  and  tend- 
 :ng  to  build  m?n  up  on  their  own  works. 
 
 and 
 
278  T  H  E    L  I  F  E     O  F 
 
 and  happlnefs.  Now,  when  men  thus  rejoice  in  the  "pcr- 
 "  fe<flions  of  God,"  and  in  the  "  infinite  excellency  of  the 
 *'  way  of  falvation  by  Chrift,"  and  in  the  holy  commands  of 
 God,  which  are  a  tranfcript  of  his  holy  nature,  theje  joys  arc 
 divine  and  fpiritual.  Our  joys  will  (land  by  us  at  the  hour 
 of  death,  if  we  can  be  then  fatibfied,  that  we  have  thus  a6ted 
 Sibovefe/f,  and  in  a  difinterefted  manner  (if  I  may  fo  exprefs 
 
 it)  rejoiced  in  the  glojy  of  the  blefTed  God. 1  fear,  you  arc 
 
 not  fufficiently  aware  how  much  falfe  religion  there  is  in  the 
 world :  many  ferious  Chriftians  and  valuable  minifters  are  too 
 eafily  impofed  upon  by  this  falfe  blaze.  1  likewife  fear,  you 
 are  not  fenfible  of  the  "  dreadful  cfFedls  and  confequences" 
 of  this  falfe  religion.  Let  me  tell  you,  it  is  the  "  devil  tranf- 
 **  formed  into  an  angel  of  light ;''  it  is  a  brat  of  hell,  that 
 always  fprings  up  with  every  revival  of  religion,  and  flabs 
 and  murders  the  caufe  of  God,  while  it  pafles  current  with 
 multitudes  of  well-meaning  people  for  the  height  of  religion. 
 Set  yourfelves,  my  brother,  to  crufh  all  appearances  of  this 
 nature,  among  the  Indians,  and  never  encourage  any  de- 
 grees of  heat  without  light.  Charge  my  people  in  the  name 
 oi  ihtir  dy:ng  7ntn:J}ei ,  yea,  in  the  name  of  him  ivho  ivas 
 dead  and  is  alive y  to  live  and  walk  as  becomes  the  golpel. 
 Teil  them,  how  great  the  expectations  of  God  and  his 
 people  are  from  them,  and  how  awfully  they  will  wound 
 God's  caufe,  if  they  fall  into  vice  ;  as  well  as  fatally  prejudice 
 other  poor  Indians.  Always  infift,  that  their  experiences  are 
 rotten,  that  their  joys  are  delujive,  although  they  may  have 
 been  rapt  up  into  the  third  heavens  in  their  own  conceit  by 
 them,  unlel's  the  main  tenour  of  their  lives  be  fpiritual,  watch- 
 ful, and    holy.     In    preffing  thefe    things,  "  thou  fiialt  both 
 
 "  fave  thyfelf,  and  thofe  that  hear  thee." 
 
 God  knows,  I  was  heartily  willing  to  have  ferved  him  longer 
 in  the  work  of  the  miniftry,  although  it  had  (till  been  attend- 
 cd  with  all  the  labours  and  hardfbips  of  paft  years,  if  he  had 
 fccn  fit  that  it  (hould  be  fo:  but  as  his  will  now  appears  ether- 
 wife,  I  am  fully  content,  and  can  with  utmoft  freedom  fay, 
 *'  The  will  of  the  Lord  be  done."  It  affefls  me,  to  think 
 of  leaving  you  in  a  world  of  fin :  my  heart  pities  you,  that 
 thofe  frorms  and  tempefis  are  yet  before  you,  which  I 
 truft,  through  grace  I  am  almoft  delivered  from.  But  "  God 
 *^  lives,  and  bleifed  be  my  Rock  :"  he  is  the  fame  almighty 
 Friend  ;  and  will,  I  truft,  be  your  Guide  and  Helper,  as  he  has 
 ceen  mine. 
 
 And 
 
Mr    DAVID     B  R  A  i  N  E  R  D.  279 
 
 And  now,  my  dear  brother,  "  I  commend  you  to  God  and 
 "  to  the  word  of  his  grace,  which  is  able  to  build  you  up,  and 
 "  give  you  inheritance  among  all  them  that  are  fandlified." 
 May  you  enjoy  the  divine  prefence,  both  in  private  and  pub- 
 lic ;  and  may  "  the  arms  of  your  hands  be  made  ftrong,  by  the 
 "  right  hand  of  the  mighty  God  of  Jacob!"  Which  are  the 
 palUonate  dcfires  and  prayers  of 
 
 Tour  affeSlionate  dying  brother, 
 
 David  Brainerd. 
 
 A  N 
 
A     N 
 
 APPENDIX. 
 
 Containing  fome  Reflections  and  Ob- 
 SRRVAT.ON3  on  the  prectding  Me- 
 moirs of  Mr   Brain  ERD. 
 
 I.  XT/E  have  here  opportunity,  as  I  apprehended,  in  a 
 VV  very  lively  irjlance,  to  fee  the  nature  of  true  reli- 
 gion; and  the  manner  ot  its  operation  when  exemplified  in  a 
 high  degree  and  power ful  exercife.  Particularly  it  may  be 
 worthy  to  be  ubferved, 
 
 r.  How  greatly  Mr  Brainerd's  religion  differed  from  that  of 
 fome  pretenders  to  the  experience  of  a  clear  work  of  faving 
 c^nverjion  wrought  on  their  hearts  ;  who  depending  and  living 
 on  that,  fettle  in  a  cold,  ca)  elefs,  and  carnal  frame  of  mind, 
 and  in  a  neglcft  of  thorough,  earneft  religion,  in  the  flated 
 praftice  of  it.  Although  his  convi(5lions  and  converfion  were 
 in  all  rclpe^ls  exceeding  clear,  and  very  remarkable ;  yet  how 
 far  was  he  from  afting  as  though  he  thought  he  had  got 
 through  his  luork,  when  once  he  had  obtained  comfort,  and 
 fatisfaftion  of  his  intereft  in  Chrift,  and  title  to  heaven?  On 
 the  contrary,  that  work  on  his  heait,  by  which  he  was 
 brought  to  this,  was  with  him  evidently  but  the  beginning  of 
 h's  work,  his  firft  entering  on  the  great  bufincfs  of  religion 
 and  the  fervice  of  God,  his  firft  fetting  out  in  his  race.  His 
 obtaining  reft  of  foul  in  Chrift,  after  earneft  ftriving  to  enter 
 in  at  the  ftrait  gate,  and  being  violent  to  take  the  kingdom  of 
 heaven,  he  did  not  look  up^n  as  putting  an  end  to  any  further 
 occafion  for  ftriving  and  violence  in  religion;  but  thefe  were 
 continued  ftill,  and  maintained  conftantly,  through  all  changes, 
 t '  the  very  end  of  life.  His  work  was  not  finifhcd,  nor  his 
 race  ended,  till  life  was  ended ;  agreeable  to  frequent  Jcrip. 
 iure-reprefentations  of  the  Chriftian  life.  He  continued  preff- 
 ing  forward  in  a  conftant  manner,  forgetting  the  things  that 
 were  behind,    and   reaching   forth  towards  the  things  that 
 
 were 
 
PRECEDING     MEMOIRS.  aSx 
 
 were  before.  His  pains  and  earneftnefs  in  the  bufinefs  of  re- 
 ligion were  rather  increafed,  than  diminifhed,  after  he  had  re- 
 ceived comfort  and  fatisfacflion  concerning  the  fafety  of  his 
 ftate.  Thofe  divine  principles,  which  after  this  he  was  ac1:u- 
 ated  by,  of  love  to  God,  and  longings  and  thirflings  after 
 holinefs,  feem  to  be  more  effefluai  to  engage  him  to  pahis 
 and  activity  in  religion,  than  fear  of  hell  had  been  before. 
 
 And  as  his  converfion  was  not  the  end  of  h's  ivork,  or  of 
 the  courfc  of  his  diligence  and  drivings  in  religion ;  fo  nei- 
 ther was  it  the  end  of  the  work  of  the  Spirit  of  God  on  his 
 heart:  but  on  the  contrary,  the  beginning  of  that  work;  the 
 beginning  of  his  fpiritual  difcoveries,  and  holy  views  ;  the 
 firll  dawning  of  the  light,  which  thenceforward  increifed 
 more  and  more;  the  beginning  of  his  holy  affeflions,  bis  for- 
 row  for  fin,  his  love  to  God,  his  rejoicing  in  Chrift  Jefus, 
 his  longings  after  holinefs.  And  the  powerful  operations  of 
 the  Spirit  of  God  in  thefe  things,  were  canied  on,  from  the 
 day  of  his  converlion,  in  a  continued  courfe,  to  his  dying  day. 
 His  religious  experiences,  his  admiration,  his  joy,  and  pi aife, 
 and  flowing  affeclions,  did  not  only  hold  up  t  >  a  conildeiable 
 height  for  a  few  days,  weeks,  or  months,  at  fii  ft,  while  hope 
 and  comfort  were  new  things  with  him  ;  and  then  gradually 
 dwindle  and  die  away,  till  they  came  to  almoft  nothing,  and 
 fo  leave  him  without  any  fenfible  or  remarkable  experience 
 of  fpiritual  difcoveries,  or  holy  and  divine  alfeftions,  for 
 months  together ;  as  it  is  with  many,  who  after  the  newnefs 
 of  things  is  over,  foon  come  to  that  pafs,  that  it  is  again  with 
 them  very  much  as  it  is  ufed  to  be  before  their  fupp.'kd  con- 
 verfion, with  refpedf  to  any  prefent  views  of  God's  glorj^ 
 of  Chrift's  excellency,  or  of  the  beauty  of  divine  things  ;  and 
 with  refpecl  to  any  prefent  thirflings  for  God,  or  ardent  out- 
 goings of  their  fouls  after  divine  objects:  but  only  now  and 
 then  they  have  a  comfortable  reflefiion  on  things  th-jy  have 
 met  with  in  times  paft,  and  are  fomething  affefted  with  them  ; 
 and  fo  reft  eafy,  thinking  all  things  are  well ;  they  have  had 
 a  good  clear  work,  and  their  uate  is  fafc,  and  they  doubt  not 
 but  they  fliall  go  to  heaven  when  they  die.  How  far  other- 
 wife  was  it  with  Mr  Brainerd,  than  it  is  vihh  fuch  perfons ! 
 His  experiences,  inftead  of  dying  away,  were  evidently  of  an 
 increafing  nature.  His  firft  love,  and  other  holy  affeftioni, 
 even  at  the  beginning  were  very  great ;  but  after  months  and 
 years,  became  much  greater,  and  more  rcmaikable ;  and  the 
 fpiritual  exercifes  of  his  mind  .continued  exceeding  great, 
 (though  not  equally  {j  at  all  times,  yet  ufually  fo),  without 
 indulged  remiffaer?,  and  without  habitual  dwindling  and  djing 
 
 N  n  away, 
 
tZi  REFLECTIONS     ON     THE  1 
 
 1 
 
 awa}^,  even  till  his  deceafc.  They  began  in  a  time  of  genera!  , 
 deadnefs  all  over  the  land,  and  were  grcutiy  inciealed  in  a  I 
 time  of  general  riviving  of  religion.  And  when  religion  de-  ; 
 cayed  again,  and  a  general  deadnefs  returned,  his  experiences  : 
 were  ftiil  kept  up  in  their  height,  and  his  holy  exerciles  main-  ' 
 tained  in  their  life  and  vig  'ur ;  and  fo  continued  to  be,  in  a 
 general  courfe,  where-ever  he  was,  and  whatever  his  circnm- 
 Itances  were,  amang  Knglifti  and  Indians,  in  company  and  ' 
 alone,  in  towns  and  cities,  and  in  the  howling  wildernefs,  in  I 
 ficknefs  and  in  health,  living  and  dying.  '1  his  is  agreeable  [ 
 to  fcripture-defcriptions  of  true  and  right  religion,  and  of  the  ' 
 ChrilVian  life.  The  change,  that  was  wrought  in  him  at  his  i 
 converlion,  was  agreeable  to  fcripture-repreientations  of  that  i 
 change  which  is  wrought  in  true  converfion ;  a  great  change,  ' 
 and  an  abiding  change,  rendering  him  a  new  man,  a  new  crea-  ! 
 tare  :  not  only  a  change  as  to  hope  and  comfort,  and  an  ap-  i 
 prehenfion  of  his  own  good  eflate ;  and  a  tranfient  change,  ' 
 confifting  in  high  flights  of  pafTing  afFcftions ;  but  a  change  \ 
 ofmitnrr,  a  change  of  the  abiding  habit  and  temper  of  his  i 
 mind.  Nor  a  partial  change,  merely  in  point  of  opinion,  j 
 or  outward  reformation ;  much  lefs  a  change  from  one  error'  ' 
 to  another,  or  from  one  fin  to  another:  but  an  univerfal  , 
 change,  both  internal  and  external;  as  from  corrupt  and  dan-  i 
 gerous  principles  in  religion,  unto  the  belief  of  the  truth,  fo  ; 
 from  both  the  habits  and  ways  of  fin,  unto  univerfal  holinefs  ; 
 of  heart  and  practice ;  from  the  power  and  fervice  of  Satan  [ 
 unto  God.  1 
 
 2.  flis  religion  did  apparently  and  greatly  differ  from  that  j 
 of  many  high  pretenders  to  religion,  who  are  frequently  ac-  ' 
 tuated  by  vehement  e?n'jtions  of  mind,  and  are  carried  on  in  a  i 
 courfe  of  fudden  zndjlrong  impreffions,  and  fuppofed  h'li'h  il-  \ 
 Juminations  and  immediate  d'fcoveriesy  and  at  the  fame  time 
 are  perfons  of  a  virulent  "  zeal,  not  according  to  know-  ■ 
 "  ledge." 
 
 His  conviftions,  preceding  his   converfion,  did  not   arife  ; 
 from  any  frightful  impreffions  on  his  imagination,  or  any  ex-  i 
 ternal  images  and  ideas  of  fire  and  brimftone,  a  fword  of  ven-  ; 
 geance  drawn,  a  dark  pit  open,  devils  in  terrible  fhapes,  6c.  j 
 firongly   fixed  in  hii  mind.     His  fight  of  his  own  linfulnefs  \ 
 did  not  confift  in  any   imagination  of  a  heap  of  lothfome  ma- 
 terial filthinefs  within  him  ;  nor  did  his  fenfe  of  the  hardnefs 
 of  his  heart  confift  in   any  bodily  feeling  in  his  bread  fome- 
 thing  hard  and  heavy  like  a  fi:one,  nor  in   any  imaginations  \ 
 whatever  of  fuch  a  nature. 
 
 His  firft  difcovery  of  God  or  Chrift,  at  his  converfion,  was  ; 
 
 not  i 
 
PRECEDING     MEMOIRS.  283 
 
 aot  any  ftrong  idea  of  any  external  glory  or  brightnefs,  or 
 majefty  and  beauty  of  countenance,  or  pleafant  voice ;  nor 
 was  it  any  fuppofed  immediate  manifeftation  of  God's  love 
 to  him  in  particular;  nor  any  imagination  of  Chrift's  fmiling 
 face,  arms  open,  or  words  immediately  fpoken  to  him,  as 
 by  name,  revealing  Chrift's  love  to  him;  either  words  of 
 fcripture,  or  any  other  :  but  a  manifcftation  of  God's  glory, 
 and  the  beauty  of  his  nature,  as  fupremely  excellent  in  itfeif; 
 powerfully  drawing,  and  fweetly  captivating  his  heart ;  bring- 
 ing him  to  a  hearty  defire  to  exalt  God,  fet  him  on  the  throne, 
 and  give  him  fupreme  honour  and  glory,  as  the  King  and 
 Sovereign  of  the  univerfe ;  and  aU'o  a  new  fenfe  of  the  infi- 
 nite wifdom,  fuitablenefs,  and  excellency  of  the  way  of  lal- 
 vation  by  Chrift ;  powerfully  engaging  his  whole  foul  to  em- 
 brace this  vvay  of  falvation,  and  to  delight  in  it.  His  firft 
 faith  did  not  confift  in  believing  that  Chrift  loved  him,  and 
 died  for  him,  in  particular.  His  firft  comfort  v/as  not  from 
 any  fecret  fuggeftion  of  God's  eternal  love  to  him,  or  that 
 God  was  reconciled  to  him,  or  intended  great  mercy  for  him  ; 
 by  any  fuch  texts  as  thefe,  "  Son,  be  ot  good  cheer,  thy  fins 
 "  are  forgiven  thee.  Fear  not,  lam  thy  God,"  6c.  or  in  any 
 fuch  way.  On  the  contrary,  when  God's  glory  was  firft  dii- 
 covered  to  him,  it  was  without  any  thought  of  falvation  as 
 his  own.  His  firft  experience  of  the  fandifying  and  com- 
 forting power  of  God's  Spirit  did  not  begin  in  fome  bodily 
 fenfation,  any  pleafant  warm  feeling  in  his  breaft,  that  he 
 (as  fome  others)  called  the  feeling  the  love  of  Chrift  in  him, 
 and  being  full  of  the  Spirit.  How  exceeding  far  were  his 
 experiences  at  his  firft  converfion  from  things  of  fuch  a  na- 
 lure  I 
 
 And  if  we  look  tbrough  the  whole  feries  of  his  experiences, 
 from  his  converfion  to  his  death,  we  fliall  find  none  of  this 
 kind.  I  have  had  occafion  to  read  his  diary  over  and  over, 
 and  very  particularly  and  critically  to  review  every  paffage  in 
 it ;  and  I  find  no  one  inftance  of  a  ftrong  impreiTion  on  his 
 imagination,  through  his  whole  life  :  no  inftance  of  a  ftrongly 
 impreftcd  idea  of  any  external  glory  and  brightnefs,  of  any 
 bodily  form  or  fhape,  any  beautiful  majeftic  counienance  :  no 
 imaginary  fight  of  Chrift  hanging  on  the  crofs,  with  his  blood 
 ftreaming  from  his  wounds;  or  leated  in  heaven  on  a  bright 
 throne,  with  angels  and  faints  bowing  before  him  ;  or  with  a 
 countenance  Imiling  on  him  ;  or  arms  open  to  embrace  him: 
 jio  fight  of  heaven,  in  his  imagination,  with  gates  of  pe^ir], 
 and  gnldpn  ftreets,  and  vaft  multimdes  of  glorious  inhabitants, 
 with  fhining  garments:  no  fight   of  the  book  of  life  op'^ned, 
 
 N  n  ^  with 
 
284  REFLECTIONS     ON    THE 
 
 with  his  name  written  in  it :  no  hearing  of  the  fweet  mufic 
 mad.'  by  the  fangs  of  heavenly  hofts ;  no  hearing  God  or 
 Chrift  immediately  fpeaking  to  him;  nor  any  fudden  fugge- 
 flions  of  words  or  fenfences,  either  words  of  fcripture,  or 
 any  other,  as  then  immediately  fpoken  or  fent  to  him  :  no 
 new  objef^live  revelations,  no  fudden  ftrong  fuggeftions  of  fe- 
 cret  fafts.  Nor  do  I  fiid  any  one  inftance  in  all  the  records 
 he  has  left  of  his  own  life,  from  beginning  to  end,  of  joy 
 excited  from  a  fuppofed  immtd'ate  witnefs  of  the  Spirit ;  or 
 inward  immediate  fuggeftion,  that  his  ftate  was  furely  good, 
 that  God  loved  him  with  an  everlafting  love,  that  Chrift  died 
 for  him  in  particular,  and  that  heaven  was  his ;  either  with 
 or  without  a  text  of  fcripture  :  no  inftance  of  comfort  by  a 
 fudden  bearing  in  upon  his  mind,  as  though  at  that  very  time 
 directed  by  God  to  him  in  particular,  any  fuch  kind  of  texts 
 as  thefe ;  "  Fear  not,  I  am  with  thee. — It  is  your  Father's 
 "  good  pleafure  to  give  you  the  kingdom. — You  have  not 
 "  chofen  me,  but  I  have  chofen  you. — 1  have  called  thee  by 
 "  thy  name,  thou  art  mine. —  Before  thou  waft  formed  in  the 
 "  belly,  I  knew  thee,"  tc.  No  fuppofed  communion  and 
 converfation  with  God  carried  on  in  -this  way  ;  no  fuch  fup- 
 pofed tafting  of  the  love  of  Chrift.  But  the  way  he  was  fatif- 
 lied  of  his  own  good  eftate,  even  to  the  entire  abolifhing  of 
 fear,  was  by  feeling  within  himfelf  the  lively  ablings  of  a  ho- 
 ly temper  and  heavenly  difpofition,  the  vigorous  exercifes  of 
 that  divine  love,  which  caft  out  fear.  This  was  the  way  he 
 had  full  fatisfa<^ion  foon  after  his  converfion,  (fee  his  diary  on. 
 Oflober  18.  and  19.  1740).  And  we  find  no  other  way  of 
 fatiofaction  through  his  whole  life  afterwards:  and  this  he 
 abuiidantly  declared  to  be  the  way,  the  only  way,  that  he  had 
 complete  ratista6>ion,  when  he  looked  death  in  the  face,  ia 
 its  near  approaches. 
 
 Some  ol-  the  pretenders  to  an  hnmediate  witnefs  by  fug- 
 gcftion,  and  defenders  of  it,  with  an  afTuming  confidence, 
 would  bear  us  in  hand,  that  there  is  no  full  afturance  with- 
 out it;  and  that  the  way  of  being  fatisfied  by  figns,  and  ar- 
 guing an  intcreft  in  Chrift  from  fan6lification,  if  it  will  keep 
 men  quiet  in  life  and  health,  yet  will  never  do  when  they 
 come  to^V.-  then  (they  fay)  men  muft  have  hnmediate  wit- 
 nefs, or  elfc  be  in  a  dreadful  uncertainty.  But  IMr  Brainerd's 
 experience  is  a  confutation  of  this ;  for  in  him  we  have  an  in- 
 flance  of  one  that  poflefTed  as  conftant  an  unftiaken  an  aftu- 
 rance,  through  the  courfe  of  his  life,  after  converfion,  as 
 perhap"^  can  be  produced  in  this  age;  which  yet  he  obtained 
 and  tnjoyed  without  any  iuch  fort  of  trfl'wr.'Vy,  and  without 
 
PRECEDING     MEMOIRS.  285 
 
 all  manner  of  appearance  of  it,  or  pretence  to  it ;  yea,  while 
 utterly  difclaiming  any  fuch  thing,  and  declaring  againft  it : 
 and  one  whofe  aflurance,  \vc  need  not  fcruple  to  affirm,  has 
 as  fair  a  claim,  and  as  juft  a  pretenfion  to  truth  and  genuine- 
 nefs,  as  any  that  the  pretenders  lo  immediate  luitnefs  can 
 produce:  and  not  only  an  inftance  of  one  that  had  fuch  aflu- 
 raace  in  life,  but  had  it  in  a  conftant  manner  in  his  laft  ill- 
 nefs;  and  particularly  in  the  latter  ftages  of  it,  through  thole 
 laft  months  of  his  life,  wherein  death  was  more  fenlibly  ap- 
 proaching, without  the  leaft  hope  of  life  :  and  had  it  too  in 
 ilsfulnefs,  and  in  the  height  of  its  excrcife,  under  thofe  re- 
 peated trials,  that  he  had  in  this  fpace  of  time ;  when  brought 
 from  time  to  time  to  the  very  brink  of  the  grave,  expefting 
 in  a  few  minutes  to  be  in  eternity.  He  had  "  the  full  alTu- 
 ''  ranee  of  hope,  unto  the  end."  When  on  the  verge  of  e- 
 ternity,  he  then  declares  his  afTurance  to  be  fuch  as  perfe£l:ly 
 fecluded  all  fear :  and  not  only  fo,  but  it  manifeftly  filled  his 
 foul  with  exceeding  joy  :  he  declaring  at  the  fame  time,  that 
 this  his  confolation  and  good  hope  through  grace  arofe  wholly 
 from  the  evidence  he  had  of  his  good  eftate,  by  what  he  found 
 of  his  fanftification,  or  the  exercife  of  a  holy  heavenly  tem- 
 per of  mind,  fupreme  love  to  God,  6c.  and  not  in  the  leaft 
 ivom.  any  i7nmed:ate  yNXinzk  by  fuggeftion:  yea,  he  declares 
 that  at  thefe  very  times  he  faw  the  awful  deh/ion  of  that  con- 
 fidence which  is  built  on  fuch  a  foundation,  as  well  as  of  the 
 whole  of  that  religion  which  it  ufually  fprings  from,  or  at 
 leaft  is  the  attendant  of;  and  that  his  foul  abhorred  thofe  de- 
 lulions :  and  he  continued  in  this  mind,  often  expreliing  it 
 with  much  folemnity,  even  till  death. 
 
 Mr  Brainerd's  religion  was  not  felfjh  and  mercenary :  his 
 love  to  God  was  primarily  and  principally  for  the  fupreme 
 excellency  of  his  oivn  nature,  and  not  built  on  a  preconceived 
 notion  that  God  loved  him,  had  received  him  into  favour,  and 
 had  done  great  things  for  him,  or  promifed  great  things  to 
 him:  fo  his  joy  was  joy  in  God,  and  not  in  himfelf.  We 
 fee  by  his  diary  how,  from  time  to  time,  through  the  courfe 
 of  his  life,  his  foul  was  filled  with  ineffable  fweetnefs  and 
 comfort  But  what  was  the  fpring  of  this  ftrong  and  abiding 
 confolation?  Not  fo  much  the  confideration  of  the  fure 
 grounds  he  had  to  think  that  his  ftate  was  good,  that  God  had 
 delivered  him  from  hell,  and  that  heaven  was  his ;  or  any 
 thoughts  concerning  his  own  diftinguiflied  happy  and  ex- 
 alted circumftances,  as  a  high  favourite  of  Heaven:  but  the 
 fweet  meditations  and  entertaining  views  he  had  of  divine 
 ^ings  iviihjut  himfelf;  the  affecting  confiderations  and  lively 
 
 ideas 
 
2«6  REFLECTIONS     ON     THE 
 
 ideas  of  God's  infinite  glory,  his  unchangeable  blefledncfs. 
 his  fovereignty  and  univti  ial  dominion  ;  together  with  the 
 fweet  exercifes  of  love  to  God,  giving  him(elf  up  to  him,  a- 
 bafing  himftlf  before  him,  denying  himfelf  for  him,  depend- 
 ing upon  him,  a6ling  for  his  glory,  diligently  ferving  him ; 
 and  the  pleafing  profpe6ls  or  hopes  he  had  ot  a  future  ad- 
 vancement of  the  kingdom  of  Chrilt,  dc. 
 
 It  appears  plainly  and  abundantly  all  along,  from  his  con- 
 Tcrfion  to  his  death,  that  that  beauty,  that  fort  of  good, 
 ■which  was  the  great  obje£l  oi  the  new  fenfe  of  his  mind,  the 
 new  relifh  and  appetite  given  him  in  convcrfion,  and  thence- 
 forward maintained  and  increafcd  in  his  heart,  was  holimess, 
 conformity  to  God,  living  to  God,  and  glorifying  him.  This 
 was  what  drew  his  heart ;  this  was  the  centre  of  his  foul ;  this 
 was  the  ocean  to  which  all  the  ftreams  of  his  religious  affec- 
 tions tended:  this  was  the  cbjcft  that  engaged  his  eager 
 thii  fting  defires  and  earncft  purfuits:  he  knew  no  true  ex- 
 cellency or  happinefs,  but  this  :  this  was  what  he  longed  for 
 moft  vehemently  and  conftantly  on  earth ;  and  this  was  with 
 him  the  beauty  and  bleffednefs  oi  heaven  ;  which  made  him  fo 
 much  and  fo  often  to  long  for  that  world  of  glory  ;  it  was 
 to  be  perfeftly  holy,  and  perfeftly  exercifed  in  the  holy  em- 
 ployments of  heaven  ;  thus  to  glorify  God,  and  enjoy  him  for 
 ever. 
 
 His  religious  illuminations,  afFeftion?,  and  comfort,  feera- 
 ed,  to  a  great  degree,  to  be  attended  with  evangelical  humilia- 
 tion ;  confifting  in  a  fenfe  of  his  own  utter  inlufficiency,  det 
 picablenefs,  and  odioufnefs ;  with  an  anfwerable  difpofition 
 and  frame  of  heart.  How  deeply  afFe^ed  was  he  almofl:  con- 
 tinually with  his  great  defe(5ls  in  religion ;  with  his  vafl  di- 
 ftance  from  that  Ipirituality  and  holy  frame  of  mind  that  be- 
 came him;  with  his  ignorance,  pride,  deadnefs,  unfteadinefs, 
 fcarrennefs?  He  was  not  only  alFcfted  with  the  remembrance 
 of  his  former  fmfulnefs,  before  his  converfion,  but  with  the 
 fenfe  of  his  prefent  vilenefs  and  pollution.  He  was  not  only 
 ditj3ofed  to  think  meanly  of  himfelf  as  before  Cody  and  in  com- 
 parifon  oi  him ;  but  arn'mfP  men,  and  as  compared  with 
 them.  He  was  apt  to  think  other  faints  better  than  he;  yea, 
 to  look  on  himfelf  as  the  meaneft  and  leaft  of  faints ;  yea, 
 very  often,  as  the  vileft  and  worfl  of  mankind.  And  not- 
 'withftanding  his  great  attainments  \x\fpiritual  knoivledge,  yet 
 v^f  find  there  is  fcarce  any  thing  that  he  is  more  frequently 
 affefted  and  abaled  with  a  fenfe  of,  than  his  ignorance. 
 
 How  eminently  did  he  appear  to  be  of  a  meek  and  (juiet  fpi- 
 rlt,  refembiing  the  iamb-like,  dove-like  Spirit  of  Jefus  Chrift! 
 
 how 
 
PRECl^DING     MEMOIRS.  tSj 
 
 how  full  of  love,  meeknefs,  quietnefs,  forglvenefs,  and  mer- 
 cy !   His  love  was  not  merely  a  fondnefs  and  ^eal  for  a  party, 
 buT  an   univcrfal  benevolence  ;  very    often   exercifed   in  the 
 mart  fenfible  and  ardent  love  to  his  greateft  oppofers  and  ene- 
 mies.    His  love  and  meeknefs  were  not  a  mere  pretence,  and 
 Outward  profelfion  and  Ihew;  but  they  were  eJicftual  things, 
 manifefted  in  expenfive   and  painhil   deeds  of  love  and  kind- 
 jiefs;  and  in  a  meek  behaviour;  readily  confeffmg  faults  under 
 the  greateft  trials,  and  humbling  himfeif  even  at  the  feet  of 
 thofe  from  whom  hd    fuppofeu  he   had   fuffered  moft  ;  and 
 from  time  to  time  very  frequently  praying  for  his  enemies, 
 abhorring  the  thoughts   of  bitternefs  or  relentment  towards 
 them.     1    fcarcely  know   where  to   look   for  any  parallel  in- 
 ft  i.ice  of  felf-denial,  in  thefe  refpefts,  in  the  prelent  age.    He 
 wai  a  pcrfv>n  of  great  zeal ;  but  how  did  he  abhor  a  bitter  zeal, 
 an  J  laiu-'nt  it  where  he  faw  it!  and  though  he  was  once  drawn 
 into  fomc  degrees  of  it,   by  the   force  of  prevailing  example, 
 as  it  were  in  his  childhood ;  yet  how  did  he  go  about  with  a 
 heart  bruifed  and  broken  in  pieces  for  it  all  his  life  after ! 
 
 Of  how  foft  and  tender  a  fpiiit  was  he  !  How  far  were  his 
 experiences,  hopes,  and  joys,  from  a  tendency  finally  to  ftupi- 
 fy  and  harden  him,  to  leflTen  conviftions  and  tenderncfs  of' 
 confcience,  to  caufe  him  to  be  lefs  aifefted  with  prefent  and 
 part  fins,  and  lefs  confcientious  with  refpecft  to  future  fins, 
 more  cafy  in  the  neglect  of  duties  that  are  troublefome  and 
 inconvenient,  more  flow  and  partial  in  complying  with  diffi- 
 cult commands,  lefs  apt  to  be  alarmed  at  the  appearance  of 
 his  own  defefts  and  tranfgrefiions,  more  eafily  induced  to  a 
 compliance  with  carnal  appetites!  On  the  contrary,  how  ten« 
 der  was  his  confcience  !  how  apt  was  his  heart  to  fmite  him .' 
 how  eafily  and  greatly  was  he  alarmed  at  the  appearance  of 
 moral  evil!  how  great  and  conftant  was  his  jealoufy  over  his 
 own  heart  I  how  ftrift  his  care  and  watchfulnefs  againft  fin! 
 how  deep  and  fenfible  were  the  wounds  that  fin  made  in  his 
 confcience!  thofe  evils  that  are  generally  accounted  fmall, 
 were  alnrtoft  an  infupportable  burden  to  him  ;  fueh  as  his  in- 
 ward deficiencies,  his  having  no  more  love  to  God,  finding 
 within  hiinfelfany  flacknefs  or  dulnefs  in  religion,  any  un- 
 fteadinefs,  or  wandering  frame  of  mind,  <bc.  how  did  the  con- 
 fideration  of  fuch  things  as  thefe  opprefs  and  abafe  him,  and 
 fill  him  with  inward  (liame  and  confufion  !  His  love  and  hope, 
 though  they  were  fuch  as  caft  out  a  fervile  fear  of  hell,  yet 
 they  were  fuch  as  were  attended  with,  and  abundantly  che- 
 ri(hed  and  promoted  a  reverential  filial  fear  of  God,  a  dread 
 of  fin  and  of  God's  holy  difplealure.     His  joy  feemed  truly 
 
 to 
 
«S8  REFLECTIONS     ON    THE 
 
 to  be  a  rejoicing  with  trembling.  His  aflurance  and  comforS 
 <lifrered  greatly  Trom  a  falfe  enthufiaftic  confidence  and  joy, 
 in  that  it  promoted  and  maintained  mourning  for  fin :  holy 
 mourning,  with  him,  was  not  only  the  work  of  an  hour  or  a 
 day,  at  his  firft  converfion ;  but  lorrow  for  fin  was  like  a 
 wound  conftantly  running ;  he  was  a  mourner  for  fin  all  his 
 days.  He  did  not,  after  he  received  comfort  and  full  fatisfac- 
 tion  of  the  forgivenefs  of  all  his  fins,  and  the  fafety  of  his 
 flate,  forget  his  paft  fins,  the  fins  of  his  youth,  that  were  com- 
 mitted before  his  converfion ;  but  the  remembrance  of  them, 
 from  time  to  time,  revived  in  his  heart,  with  renewed  grief. 
 That  in  Ezek.  xvi.  6^.  was  evidently  fulfilled  in  him,  "  That 
 "  thou  mayft  remember,  and  be  confounded,  and  never  open 
 "  thy  mouth  any  more,  becaufe  of  thy  (hame ;  when  I  am 
 "  pacified  toward  thee  for  all  that  thou  haft  done."  And 
 how  laftingly  did  the  fins  that  he  committed  after  his  conver- 
 fion, affeft  and  break  his  heart !  if  he  did  any  thing  whereby 
 he  thought  he  had  in  anyrefpedl  dilhonoured  God,  and  wound- 
 ed the  intereft  of  religion,  he  had  never  done  with  calling  it 
 to  mind  with  forrow  and  bitternefs;  though  he  was  aflured 
 that  God  had  forgiven  it,  yet  he  never  forgave  himfelf :  his 
 pafl:  forrows  and  fears  made  no  fatisfaftion,  with  him ;  but 
 ilill  the  wound  renews  and  bleeds  afrefh,  again  and  again. 
 And  his  prefent  fins,  that  he  daily  found  in  himfelf,  were 
 an  occafion  of  daily  fenfible  and  deep  forrow  of  heart. 
 
 His  religion  did  not  confift  in  unaccountable  flights  and 
 vehement  pangs;  fuddenly  rifing,  and  fuddenly  falling;  at 
 fome  turns  exalted  almoft  to  the  third  heavens,  and  then  at 
 other  turns  negligent,  vain,  carnal,  and  fwallowed  up  with 
 the  world,  for  days  and  weeks,  if  not  months  together. 
 His  religion  was  not  like  a  blazing  meteor,  or  like  a  liaming 
 comet,  (or  a  wandering  ftar,  as  the  apoftle  Jude  calls  it,  verf. 
 13.)  fiying  through  the  firmament  with  a  bright  train,  and 
 then  quickly  going  out  in  perfeft  darknefs ;  but  more  like  the 
 fteady  lights  of  heaven,  that  are  conftant  principles  of  light, 
 though  fomctimes  hid  with  clouds.  Nor  like  a  land-flood, 
 which  flows  far  and  w'lie,  with  a  rapid  ftream,  bearing  down 
 all  afore  it,  and  then  dried  vp  ;  bur  more  like  a  ftream  fed  by 
 living  fprings ;  which  though  fometimes  increafed  by  fliowers, 
 and  at  other  times  diminifiied  by  drought,  yet  is  a  conjlant 
 fiream. 
 
 His  religious  affe£lions  and  joys  were  not  like  thofe  of 
 fome,  who  have  rapture  and  mighty  emotions  from  time  to 
 time  in  company  ;  but  have  very  little  affe(^tion  in  retirement 
 and  fecret  places.     Though  he  was  of  a  very  fociable  temper, 
 
 and 
 
PRECEDING     MEMOIRS.  2S9 
 
 ind  loved  the  company  of  faints,  and  delighted  very  much  iti 
 religious  conrerfation,  and  in  fecial  worfhip  ;  yet  his  warmeft 
 afFeftions,  and  their  greateft  effects  on  animal  nature,  and  his 
 fwcetcll  joys,  were  in  his  clofet  devotions,  and  folitary  tranf- 
 aflions  between  God  and  his  own  foul ;  as  is  very  oblervable 
 through  his  whole  courfe,  from  his  converfion  to  his  death. 
 He  delighted  greatly  in  facred  retirements;  and  loved  to  get 
 quite  away-  from  ail  the  world,  to  converfe  with  God  alone, 
 in  fecret  duties. 
 
 ^  Mr  Brainerd's  experiences  and  comforts  were  very  far 
 from  being  like  thofe  of  fome  perfons,  which  are  attended 
 with  a  fpiritual  fatiety,  and  put  an  end  to  their  religious  de- 
 fires  and  longings,  at  ieafl:  to  the  edge  and  ardency  of  them ; 
 rcfting  fatisfi^d  in  their  own  attainments  and  comforts,  as 
 having  obtained  their  chief  end,  which  is  to  extinguifli  their 
 fears  of  hell,  and  give  them  confi.lence  of  the  favour  of  God. 
 How  far  were  his  religious  afFedions,  refrefhments,  and  fa- 
 tisfa£lions,  from  fuch  an  operation  and  influence  as  this!  On 
 the  contrary,  how  were  they  always  attended  with  longings 
 and  thirftings  after  greater  degrees  of  conformity  to  God! 
 And  the  greater  and  fweeter  his  comforts  were,  the  more  vehe- 
 ment were  his  delires  after  hrAinefs.  for  it  is  to  be  obferved, 
 that  his  longings  were  not  fo  much  after  joyful  difcoveries 
 of  God's  love,  and  clear  views  of  his  title  to  future  advance- 
 ment and  eternal  honours  in  heaven ;  as  after  more  of  pre- 
 fent  holinefs,  greater  fpirituality,  an  heart  more  engaged  for 
 God,  to  love,  and  exalt,  and  depend  on  him  ;  an  ability  better 
 to  ferve  him,  to  do  more  for  his  glory,  and  to  do  all  that  he 
 did  with  more  of  a  regard  to  Chrift  as  his  righteoufnefs  and 
 ftrength ;  and  after  the  enlargement  and  advancement  of 
 Chrift's  kingdom  in  the  earth.  And  his  defires  were  not  idle 
 wifliings  and  wouldings,  but  fuch  as  were  powerful  and  effec- 
 tual, to  animate  him  to  the  earnelt,  eager  purfuit  of  thefc 
 things,  with  utmoft  diligence  and  unfainting  labour  ind  felf- 
 ienial.  His  comforts  never  put  an  end  to  his  feeking  after 
 God,  and  flriving  to  obtain  his  grace ;  but,  on  the  contrary, 
 'reatly  engaged  and  enlarged  him  therein. 
 
 His  religion  did  nrt  confifl:  only  in  experience,  without 
 ^ra^ice.  All  his  inward  illuminations,  affedions,  and  com- 
 forts, feemed  to  have  a  dire^i:  tendency  to  pra(fiice,  and  to 
 ifue  in  it:  and  this,  not  merely  a  practice  negatively  good. 
 Tee  from  grofs  a^Sls  of  irreligion  and  immorality ;  but  a 
 jraftice  pojitively  holy  and  Chriflian,  in  a  ferious,  devout, 
 lumble,  meek,  merciful,  charitable,  and  beneficent  conver- 
 iationj  making  the  fervice   of  God,   and  our  Lord    Jcfus 
 
 Q  o  Chrift, 
 
i9«  REFLECTIONS     ON    THE 
 
 Chrill,  the  great  bufinefs  of  life,  which  he  was  devoted  t<y, 
 and  purfued  with  the  greateft  earneftnefs  and  diligence  to  the 
 end  of  his  days,  through  all  trials.  Jn  him  was  to  be  feeft 
 the  right  way  of  being  Lvely  in  religion :  his  I'velinefs  in  re- 
 ligion did  not  confift  merely  or  mainly  in  his  being  lively  with 
 the  tofigue,  but  in  deed',  not  in  being  forward  in  profeflion 
 and  outward  (hew,  and  abundant  in  declaring  his  own  expe- 
 riences; but  chiefly  in  being  aftive  and  abundant  in  the  la- 
 bours and  duties  of  religion;  "not  flothful  in  bufinefs,  but 
 "  fervent  in  fpirit,  ferving  the  Lord,  and  fcrving  his  genera- 
 "  tion,  according  to  the  will  of  God." 
 
 By  thefe  thing.-,  many  high  pretenders  to  religion,  and 
 profeflbrs  of  extra  )rdinary  fpiritual  experience,  may  be  fen- 
 lible,  that  Mr  Brainerd  did  gieatly  condemn  their  kind  of 
 religion  ;  and  that  not  only  in  word,  but  by  example,  both  li- 
 ving and  dying ;  as  the  whole  feries  of  his  Chriltian  expe- 
 rience andpraftice,  from  his  converfion  to  his  death,  appears  a 
 conftant  condemnation  of  it. 
 
 It  cannot  be  objefled,  that  the  reafon  why  he  fo  much 
 difliked  the  religion  of  thefe  pretenders,  and  why  his  own  fo 
 much  differed  from  it,  was,  that  his  experiences  were  not 
 clear.  There  is  no  room  to  fay,  they  were  otherwife,  in 
 any  refpeft,  in  which  clearnefs  of  experience  has  been 
 v/ont  to  be  infifted  on ;  whether  it  be  the  clearnefs  of  their 
 nature  or  of  their  order,  and  the  method  his  foul  was  at  fiift 
 brcuoht  to  reft  and  comfort  in  his  converfion.  I  am  far  from 
 thinking  (and  fo  was  he)  that  clearnefs  of  the  order  of  ex- 
 periences is,  in  ann  meafure,  of  equal  importance  with  the 
 clearnefs  of  their  «^f«re.-  I  have  fufficiently  declared  in  my 
 difcourfe  on  religious  affe£iions,  (which  he  exprefsly  appro*- 
 ved  of  and  recommended),  that  I  do  not  fuppofe,  a  fenfible  di- 
 ftinflnefs  of  xhefieps  of  the  Spirit's  operation  and  method  of 
 fucceffive  convictions  and  illuminations,  is  a  necefl'ary  requi- 
 fite  to  perfons  being  received  in  full  charity,  as  true  faints  j 
 provided  the  nature  of  the  things  they  profefs  be  right,  and 
 their  praflice  agreeable.  Neverthelefs,  it  is  obfervable, 
 (which  cuts  otf  all  objeflion  from  fuch  as  would  be  moft 
 unreafonably  difpofed  to  object  and  cavil  in  the  prelent 
 cafe),  fo  it  was,  that  Mr  Brainerd's  experiences  were 
 not  only  clear  in  the  latter  refpeCl:,  but  remarkably  fo  in  the 
 former :  fo  that  there  is  not  perhaps  one  inftance  in  five  hun- 
 dred true  converts,  that  on  this  account  can  be  parallelled  with 
 him. 
 
 It  cannot  be  pretended,  that  the  reafon  why  he  fo  much 
 abhorred  and  condemned  the  notions  and  experiences  of  thefe 
 
 whofc 
 
PRECEDING     MEMOIRS.  -291 
 
 irhofe  \^r/?  faith  confiAs  in  believing  that  Chrift  is  theirs^ 
 and  that  Chnft  ^/e^ /or  them.',  without  any  previous  expe- 
 rience of  union  of  heart  to  him,  for  his  exceJlcncy,  2s  he  is 
 in  himfelf,  and  not  for  his  fuppofed  love  to  them ;  and  who 
 judge  of  their  intcreft  in  Chrift,  their  juflification,  and  God's 
 love  X.0  them,  not  by  their  fanftificatiun,  and  the  exerciies 
 and  fruits  of  grace,  but  by  a  fuppofed  immediate  witnefs  of 
 the  Spirit,  by  inward  fuggeftion ;  I  fay,  it  cannot  be  pre- 
 tended, that  the  reafon  why  he  fo  much  detellcd  and  con- 
 demned fuch  opinions  and  experiences,  was,  that  he  was  of 
 a  too  legal  fpirit ;  either  that  he  never  was  dead  to  the  law, 
 never  experienced  a  thorough  work  of  conviction,  was  never 
 fully  brought  off  from  his  own  righteoufnefs,  and  weaned 
 from  the  dd  covenant,  by  a  thorough  legal  humiliation ;  or 
 that  afterwards,  he  had  no  great  degree  of  er<v«^(?//crt/ humi- 
 liation, not  living  in  a  deep  fenfe  of  his  own  emptinefs, 
 wretchednefs,  poverty,  and  abfolute  dependance  on  the  mere 
 grace  of  God  through  Chrift.  For  his  conviftions  of  fin, 
 preceding  his  firft  confoiations  in  Chrift,  were  exceeding 
 deep  and  thorough ;  his  trouble  and  exercile  of  mind,  by  a 
 fenfe  of  fin  and  mifery,  very  great,  and  long  continued ;  and 
 the  light  let  into  his  mind  at  his  converfion,  and  in  progref- 
 five  fanctification,  appears  to  have  had  its  genuine  humbling 
 influence  upon  him,  to  have  kept  him  low  in  his  own  eyes, 
 not  confiding  in  himfelf,  but  in  Chrift,  *'  living  by  the  faith 
 "  of  the  Son  of  God,  and  looking  for  the  mercy  of  the  Lord 
 f'  Jefus  to  eternal  life." 
 
 Nor  can  it  be  pretended,  that  the  reafon  why  he  condemn- 
 ed thefe,  and  other  things,  which  this  foit  of  people  call  the 
 very  height  of  vital  religion  and  the  power  of  godlinefs,  was, 
 that  he  was  a  dead  Chrijilan,  and  lived  in  the  dark,  (as  they 
 exprefs  themfelves) ;  that  his  experiences,  though  they  might 
 be  true,  were  not  great ;  that  he  did  not  live  near  to  God, 
 had  but  a  fmall  acquaintance  with  him,  and  bad  but  a  dim 
 fight  of  fpiritual  things.  If  any,  after  they  have  read  the 
 preceding  account  of  Mr  Brainerd's  life,  will  venture  to  pre- 
 tend thus,  they  will  only  fliew  that  they  themfehes  are  in  the 
 dark,  and  do  indeed  "putdarknefs  for  light,  and  light  for 
 "  darknefs." 
 
 It  is  common  with  this  fort  of  people,  if  there  is  any  one, 
 ■whom  they  cannot  deny  to  exhibit  good  evidences  of  true 
 g  idlinefs,  who  yet  appears  to  diflike  their  notions,  and  con- 
 demn thofe  things  wherein  they  place  the  height  of  religion, 
 to  infinuate,  that  they  are  afraid  rf  the  crofs,  and  have  a  mind 
 to  cuny  favour  luithihe  world,  and  the  like.    But  I  prefumc, 
 
 O  o  ?  this 
 
^92  REFLECTIONS     ON    THE 
 
 this  will  not  be  pretended  concerning  Mr  Brainerd,  by  any 
 0:ie  pcrfon  that  has  read  the  preceding  account  of  his  life. 
 It  muft  needs  appear  a  thing  notorious  to  fuch,  that  he  was 
 an  extraordinary,  and  almoft  unparallelled  inftancc  (in  thcfe 
 times,  and  thefe  parts  of  the  world)  of  the  contrary  difpofi- 
 tion ;  and  that,  whether  we  confider  what  he  has  recorded  of 
 his  inward  experience,  from  time  to  time  ;  or  his  pr^6?ice, 
 how  he  in  fa(ft  took  up  and  embraced  the  crofs,  and  bore  it 
 conflantly,  in  his  great  ielf-denials,  labours,  and  futferings  for 
 the  name  of  Jefus,  and  went  on  without  fainting,  without  re- 
 penting, or  repining,  to  his  dying  illnefs :  how  he  did  not 
 only,  from  time  to  time,  relinquifli  and  renounce  the  luorld 
 fecretly,  in  his  hfart,  with  the  full  and  fervent  confent  of 
 all  the  powers  of  his  foul ;  but  openly  and  actually  forfook 
 the  "world,  with  its  pofTeflions,  delights,  and  common  com- 
 forts, to  dwell  as  it  were  with  wild  beafls,  in  a  howling 
 wiidernefs ;  with  conftant  cheerfulnefs,  complying  with  the 
 numerous  hardfhips  of  a  life  of  toil  and  travel  there,  to  pro- 
 mote the  kingdom  of  his  dear  Redeemer.  And  befidcs,  it  ap- 
 pe.ars  by  the  preceding  hiftory,  that  he  never  did  more  con- 
 demn the  things  forementioned,  never  had  a  greater  fenfe  of 
 their  dclufion,  pernicious  nature,  and  ill  tendency,  and  never 
 was  more  full  of  pity  to  thofe  that  are  led  away  with  them, 
 than  in  his  laft  illnefs,  and  at  times  when  be  had  the  neareft 
 profpe^  of  death,  fuppofed  himfelf  to  be  on  the  Tcry  brink 
 of  eternity,  and  looked  on  all  this  lower  world  as  what  he 
 never  ftiould  have  any  thing  more  to  do  with.  Surely  he  did 
 not  condemn  thofe  things  at  thefe  feafons,  only  to  curry  fa- 
 vour luith  the  ivorU. 
 
 Befides  what  has  been  already  related  of  Mr  Brainerd's  fen- 
 timents  in  his  dying  flate  concerning  true  and  falfe  religion, 
 we  have  his  deliberate  and  folemn  thoughts  on  this  fubje<Sf, 
 further  appearing  by  his  Preface  to  Mr  Shepard's  diary,  be- 
 fore mentioned ;  which,  when  he  wrote  it,  he  fuppofed  to  be 
 (as  it  proved)  one  of  the  laft  things  he  fhould  ever  write.  I 
 iliall  here  inlert  a  part  of  that  Preface,  as  follows. 
 
 ''  How  much  ftrefs  is  laid  by  many  upon  fome  things  as  be- 
 "  ing  efFerts  a,nd  evidences  of  exalted  degrees  of  religion, 
 *'  when  they  are  fo  far  from  being  of  any  importance  in  it, 
 *'  that  they  are  really  irreligious,  a  mixture  oi felflore,  ima- 
 **  g'matlon,  and  fpiritual  pride,  or  perhaps  the  influence  of 
 **  Satan  transformed  into  an  angel  of  light  ;  I  fay,  how  much 
 *'  flrefs  is  laid  on  thcfe  things  by  many,  I  fhall  not  determine  t 
 "  but  it  is  much  to  be  feared,  that  while  God  was  carrying 
 f  on  a  gloiicus  work   of  grace,  and  undoubtedly  gathering  a 
 
 "  harveft 
 
PRECEDING     MEMOIRS.  293 
 
 **  harvcft  of  fouls  to  himfelf,  (which  we  fliould  always  rc- 
 -?*  member  with  thankfulnefs),  numbers  of  others  have  at  the 
 ^*  fame  time  been  fatally  deluded  by  the  devices  of  the  devil, 
 "  and  their  own  corrupt  hearts.  It  is  to  be  feared,  that  the 
 '*  converfvms  of  fome  have  no  better  foundation  than  this ; 
 **  viz.  that  after  they  have  l^een  under  fome  concern  for 
 "  their  fouls  for  a  while,  and^if-  may  be  manifefted  fome  very 
 "  great  and  uncommon  diftrefs  and  agonies,  they  have  on  a 
 *'  fudden  imagined  they  favj  Chrifi,  in  fome  pofture  or  other, 
 "  perhaps  on  the  crols,  bleeding  and  dying  for  their  fins ;  or 
 *'  it  may  be,  fmiling  on  them,  and  thereby  fignifying  his  love 
 "  to  them  :  and  that  thefe  and  the  like  things,  though  mere 
 "  imaginations,  which  have  nothing  fpiritual  in  them,  have  in- 
 "  flantiy  removed  all  their  fears  and  diftrefles,  filled  them 
 "  with  raptures  of  joy,  and  made  them  imagine,  that  they 
 "  loved  Chrift  with  all  their  hearts  ;  when  the  bottom  of  all 
 *'  was  nothing  but  fc'f-love.  For  when  they  imagined  that 
 "  Chrift  had  been  (o  good  to  them  as  to  fave  them,  and  as  it 
 **  were  to  fingle  them  out  of  all  the  world,  they  could  not 
 "  but  feel  fome  kind  of  natural  gratitude  to  him  ;  although 
 *'  they  never  had  any  fpiritual  view  of  his  divine  glory,'  ex- 
 **  ccllency,  and  beauty,  and  confequently  never  had  any  love 
 "  to  him  for  himfelf.  Or  that  inftead  of  having  fome  fuch 
 **  imaginary  view  of  Chrift  as  has  been  mentioned,  in  order 
 "  to  remove  their  diftrefs,  and  give  them  joy,  fome  having  had 
 "  a  pa/Tage,  or  perhaps  many  paflages  of  fcripture  brought 
 "  to  their  minds  with  poiver,  (as  they  exprefs  it),  fuch  as  that, 
 *'  "  Son,  be  of  good  cheer,  thy  fins  are  forgiven  thee,"  and  the 
 **  like,  they  have  immediately  applied  thefe  pafiages  to  them- 
 "  /elves,  fuppofing  that  God  hereby  manifefted  his  peculiar 
 **  favour  to  them,  as  if  mentioned  by  name :  never  confider- 
 "  ing,  that  they  are  now  giving  heed  to  new  revelations, 
 **  there  being  no  fuch  thing  revealed  in  the  word  of  God,  as 
 "  that  this  or  that  particular  perfon  has,  or  ever  ftiall  have  his 
 "  fins  forgiven ;  nor  yet  remembering,  that  Satan  can,  w  ith  a 
 **  great  deal  of  feeming  pertinency,  (and  perhaps  alfo  with  con- 
 *'  fiderablc  power),  bring  fcripture  to  the  minds  of  men,  as  he 
 **  did  to  Chrift  himfelf.  And  thus  thefe  rejoice  upon  having 
 **  fome  fcripture  fuddenly  fuggefted  to  them,  or  impreifed 
 f*  upon  their  minds,  fuppofing  they  are  now  the  children  of 
 *'  God,  juft  as  did  the  other  upon  their  imaginary  views  of 
 "  Chrift.  And  it  is  faid,  that  fome  fpcak  of  feeing  a  great 
 *'  light  which  filled  all  the  place  where  they  were,  and  dif- 
 5*  pelled  all  their  darknefs,  fears,  f.nd  diftreffes,  and  almoft  ra- 
 f  vifhed  their  fouls.     While  others  have  had  it  warmly  fug- 
 
 <'  gcfted 
 
a^        REFLECTIONS    ON    THE 
 
 *'  gcfted  to  their  minds,  not  by  any  paflage  of  fcripture,  but 
 *'  as  it  were  by  a  'whijper  or  voice  from  heaven,  "  That  God 
 *'  loves  theni,  that  chrift  is  theirs,"  cc  which  groundlefs 
 "  imaginations  and  luggcftions  or  Satan  have  had  the  fame  ef- 
 V  fe<ft  upon  them,  that  the  dclufions  before  mentioned  had  oa 
 
 **  the  others. And  as  is  the  converfion  of  this  fort  of  pcr- 
 
 '*  fons,  fj  are  iht'w  after-experiences ;  the  whole  being  built 
 "  up.)n  imagination,  ftrong  impreffions,  and  fudden  fugge- 
 *'  flions  made  to  their  mind::;  whence  they  are  ufually  extreme 
 *'  confident  (as  if  immediately  informed  Irora  God)  nutcnly  of 
 *'  tlie  goodnefs  of  their  own  ftate,  but  ot  their  intalhble  know- 
 "  ledge,  and  abf)iute  certainty,  of  the  truth  of  every  thing 
 **  they  pretend  to,  under  the, notion  of  religion  ;  and  thus  all 
 "  reaibning  with  fome  of  them  is  utterly  excluded. 
 
 "  But  it  is  remarkable  of  thefe,  that  they  are  extremely  de- 
 "  fcient  in  regard  of  ii  uc  poverty  oi  Ipirit,  fenfe  of  exceed- 
 **  ing  viiencfs  in  themfelvcs,  fuch  as  frequently  makes  truly 
 **  gracious  fouls  to  grone,  being  burdened;  as  alio  in  regard 
 "  of  meeknefs,  love,  and  gentlenefs  towards^mankind,  tender- 
 "  nefs  of  confcience  in  their  ordinary  affairs  and  dealings  in 
 "  the  world.  And  it  is  rare  to  fee  them  deeply  concerned 
 "  about  the  piinciples  and  ends  of  their  anions,  and  under 
 "  fears  left  tl.ey  (hould  not  eye  the  glory  of  God  chiefly,  but 
 '*  live  to  thernfelves ;  or  this  at  leaf!  is  the  cafe  in  their  ordi- 
 "  nary  conduft,  whether  civil  or  religious.  But  if  any  one 
 "  of  their  particular  notions,  which  their  zeal  has  efpoufed, 
 ■^^  be  attacked,  they  are  then  fo  conlcientious,  they  mult 
 ''  burn,  if  called  to  it,  for  the  defence  of  it.  Yet,  at  the 
 "  fame  time,  when  they  are  fo  extretncly  deficient  in  regard 
 *'  of  thefe  precious  divine  tempers  which  have  been  mcn- 
 "  tioned,  they  are  ufually  full  oi  ztal,  concern,  and  fetvency 
 "  in  the  things  of  religion,  and  often  dijcourfe  of  them  with 
 "  much  warmth  and  engagement :  and  to  thofe  who  do  not 
 "  know,  or  do  nut  confider,  wherein  the  elfence  of  true  reli- 
 /'  gion  confifls,  viz.  in  being  conformed  to  the  image  cf  ChriJ}, 
 ^'  not  in  point  of  zeal  and  fervency  only,  but  in  all  divine 
 *'  tempers  and  practices ;  I  fay,  to  thofe  who  do  not  duly 
 *'  obferve  and  diftinguifh,  they  often  appear  like  the  beft  of 
 "  men." 
 
 It  is  common  with  this  fort  of  people  to  fay,  that  "  God 
 *'  is  amongft  them,  his  Spirit  accompanies  their  exhortations, 
 *'  and  other  adminiftrations,  and  they  are  fealed  by  the  Holy 
 **  Ghofl,"  in  the  remarkable  fuccefs  they  have,  in  the  great 
 afFec>ions  that  are  flirrcd  up  in  God's  people,  6c. ;  but  to  in- 
 finuate  en  the  contrary,  that  "  he  is  not  with  their  cppo- 
 
 "  nenisi''' 
 
fKECtVinC     MEMOIRS.  195 
 
 "  ncnts;"  and  particularly,  "  that  God  has  forfaken  the 
 "  ftanding  niiniftry ;  and  that  the  time  is  come,  when  it  is  the 
 **  will  ot  God  that  they  fliould  be  put  down,  and  that  God's 
 "  people  (hould  forfake  them ;  and  that  no  more  fuccefs  is 
 *'  to  be  expefted  to  attend  their  adminiftrations." — But  where 
 can  they  find  an  inftance,  among  all  their  moft  flaming  ex^ 
 horters,  who  has  been  fealed  with  fo  inconteftable  and  won- 
 derful fuccefs  of  his  labours,  as  Mr  Brainerd,  not  only  in 
 quickening  and  comforting  God's  children,  but  alfo  in  a  work 
 of  conviflion  and  converlion,  (which  they  own  has  in  a  great: 
 meafureceafed  for  a  long  time  among  themfelves),  with  a  moft 
 ▼ilible  and  aftonifhing  manifeftation  of  God's  power,  on  fub- 
 jefts  fo  unprepared,  and  that  had  been  brought  up  and  lived^ 
 fomeofthem  to  old  age,  in  the  deepeft  prejudices  againft  the 
 very  firft  principles  of  Chriftianity ;  the  divine  power  accom- 
 panying his  labDurs,  producing  the  moft  remarkable  and  abi- 
 ding change,  turning  the  wildernefs  into  a  fruitful  field,  and 
 caufing  that  which  was  a  defart  indeed  to  bud  and  bloflbm  as 
 the  rofe?  And  this  although  he  was  not  only  one  of  their 
 grcateft  opponents  in  their  errors ;  but  alfo  one  of  thofe  they 
 Call  the  Jland'ng  minrfiry ;  fi.ft  examined  and  licenfed  to 
 preach  by  fuch  min'-fiers,  and  fent  forth  among  the  Heathen 
 by  fuch  min'fiers ;  and  afterwards  ovdz\r\QAby  fuch  jninifters ; 
 always  dire^ed  by  them,  and  united  with  them  in  their  con- 
 fiftories,  and  adminiftrations :  and  even  abhorring  the  practice 
 of  thofe  who  give  out,  that  they  ought  to  be  renounced  and 
 feparated  from,  and  that  teachers  may  be  ordained  by  lay- 
 men. 
 
 It  cannot  be  pretended  by  thefe  men,  that  Mr  Brainerd 
 condemned  their  religion,  onlj  becaufe  he  was  not  acquainted 
 ivith  them,  and  had  not  opportunity  for  full  obfervation  of  the 
 nature,  operation,  and  tendency  of  their  experiences :  for  he 
 had  abundant  and  peculiar  opportunities  of  fuch  obfervatioa 
 and  acquaintance.  He  lived  through  the  late  extraordinary 
 time  of  religious  commotion,  and  faw  the  beginning  and  end, 
 the  good  and  the  bad  of  it.  He  bad  opportunity  to  fee  the 
 various  operations  and  effefls,  that  were  wrought  in  this  fea- 
 fon,  more  extenjively,  than  any  perfon  I  know  of.  His  na- 
 tive place  was  about  the  middle  of  Conneiflicut;  and  he  was 
 much  converfant  in  all  parts  of  that  colony.  He  was  con- 
 vcrfant  in  the  caftern  parts  of  it,  after  the  religion  which 
 he  condemned,  began  much  to  prevail  there.  He  was  conver- 
 fant with  the  zealous  people  on  Long-Ifland,  from  one  end 
 bfrhe  ifland  to  the  other ;  and  alfo  in  New  Jerfey  and  Pen- 
 fylvania ;  v.'ith  people  of  various  nations.     He  had  fome  fpe» 
 
 cial 
 
29^  REFLECTIONS     ON    THE 
 
 cial  opportunites  in  fomc  places  in  this  province,  (MafTachufctg 
 Bay),  where  has  been  very  much  of  this  fort  of  religion,  and 
 at  a  time  when  it  greatly  prevailed.  He  had  converfed  and 
 difputed  with  abundance  of  this  kind  of  people  in  various  parts, 
 as  he  told  me ;  and  alfo  informed  me,  that  he  had  ft  en  fome- 
 thing  of  the  fame  appearances  in  fome  of  the  Indians,  whom 
 he  had  preached  to,  and  had  opportunity  to  fee  the  beginning 
 and  end  of  them.  And  befides,  Mr  Brainerd  could  fpeak  more 
 feelingly  and  underAandingly  concerning  thcfe  things,  becaufe 
 there  was  once  a  time  when  he  was  drawn  away  into  an  cftcem 
 of  them,  and  for  a  lliort  feafon  had  united  himfelf  to  this 
 kind  of  people,  and  partook,  in  fome  refpe<fls,  of  their  fpirit 
 and  behaviour. 
 
 But  I  proceed  to  another  obfervation  on  the  foregoing  me- 
 moirs. 
 
 '  II.  This  hiftory  of  Mr  Brainerd's  may  help  us  to  make 
 dift'inSihns  among  the  high  religious  affe^ions,  and  remark- 
 able imprefflons  made  on  the  minds  of  perfons,  in  a  time  of 
 gvesit  awakening,  and  revival  of  religion  ;  and  may  convince  us, 
 that  there  are  not  only  diflinftions  in  theory  ^  invented  to  fave 
 the  credit  of  pretended  revivals  of  religion,  and  what  is  called 
 the  experience  of  the  operations  of  the  Spirit;  but  diftinftions 
 that  do  aiftually  take  place  in  the  courfe  of  events,  and  have 
 a  real  and  evident  foundation  in  fa^. 
 
 Many  dn  and  will  confound  things,  blend  all  together,  and 
 fay,  "  it  is  all  alike  ;  it  is  all  of  the  fame  fort."  So  there  are 
 many  that  fay  concerning  the  religion  moft  generally  prevail- 
 ing among  the  Separatifts,  and  the  affeflions  they  manifeft, 
 *  It  is  the  fame  that  was  all  over  the  land  feven  years  ago.'* 
 And  fome  that  have  read  Mr  Brainerd's  Journal,  giving  an 
 account  of  the  extraordinary  things  that  have  come  to  pals  a- 
 mong  the  Indians  in  New-Jerfey,  fay,  "  It  is  evidently  the 
 **  fame  thing  that  appeared  in  many  places  amongft  the  Eng- 
 ''  lirti,  which  has  now  proved  naught,  and  come  to  that 
 "  which  is  worfe  than  nothing."  And  all  the  reafon  they 
 have  thus  to  determine  all  to  be  the  fame  work,  and  the  fame 
 Jpirit,  is,  that  the  one  manifefted  high  aifecf^ions,  and  fo  do 
 the  other ;  the  great  afFeftions  of  the  one  had  fome  influence 
 on  their  bodies,  and  fo  have  the  other ;  the  one  ufe  the  terms 
 conviclion,  converfion,  humiliation,  coming  to  ChriJ},  dfcove- 
 ries,  experiences.  Sec.  and  fo  do  the  other ;  the  imprel^ 
 flons  on  the  one  are  attended  with  a  great  deal  of  zeal,  and  fo 
 it  is  with  the  other;  the  affeftions  of  the  one  difpofe  them  to 
 ipeak  much  about  things  of  religion,  and  fo  do  the  other; 
 
 the 
 
pRt:cttlU  G     MEMOIRS.  297 
 
 the  one  delight  much  in  religious  meetings,  and  fo  do  the  o- 
 
 ther. The  agreement  that  appears  in  thefe,  and  fuch  like 
 
 things,  make  them  conclude,  that  furely  all  is  alike,  all  is  the 
 fame  work.  Whereas,  on  a  clofer  infpeflion  and  critical  ex- 
 amination, it  would  appear,  that  notwithftanding  an  agree- 
 ment in  fuch  circumftances,  yet  indeed  there  is  a  vafl:  differ- 
 ence, both  in  ejfence  and  fruits.  A  confiderable  part  of  the 
 religious  operations,  that  were  fix  or  feven  years  ago,  efpe- 
 cially  towards  the  latter  part  of  that  extraordinary  fealbn, 
 was  doubtlefs  of  the  fame  fort  with  the  icligion  of  the  Sepa- 
 ratifts ;  but  not  all :  there  were  many,  whofe  experiences 
 were,  like  Mr  Brainerd's,  in  a  judginent  of  charity,  genuine 
 and  inconteflable. 
 
 Not  only  d)  the  oppofers  of  all  religion  confining  in 
 powerful  operations  and  afFei^lions,  thus  confound  things; 
 but  many  of  the  pretenders  to  fuch  religion  do  fo.  They 
 that  have  been  the  fubjefts  of  fome  fort  of  vehement,  but  vaiit 
 operations  on  their  mind,  when  they  hear  the  relation  of  the 
 experiences  of  fome  real  and  eminent  Chriftians,  they  fay, 
 their  experiences  are  of  the  fame  fort :  fo  they  fay,  they  are 
 juft  like  the  experiences  of  eminent  Chriftians  in  former  times, 
 which  we  have  printed  accounts  of.  So,"  I  doubt  not,  but 
 there  are  many  deluded  people,  if  they  fhould  read  the  pre- 
 ceding account  of  Mr  Brainerd's  life,  who  reading  without 
 much  underftanding,  or  careful  obfervation,  would  fay,  with- 
 out hefitation,  that  fome  things  which  they  have  met  with, 
 are  of  the  very  fame  kind  with  what  he  exprefles :  when  the 
 agreement  is  only  in  fome  general  circumftances,  or  fome  par- 
 ticular things  that  are  fuperficial,  and  belonging  as  it  were  to 
 the  profefhon  and  outfide  of  religion  ;  but  the  inward  temper 
 of  mind,  and  the  fruits  in  practice,  are  as  oppofite  and  diftant 
 as  eaft  and  weft. 
 
 Many  fiottej?  good  people  alfo,  and  true  Chriflians,  do  not 
 very  well  know  how  to  make  a  diiference.  The  gliftering 
 appearance  and  glaring  (how  of  falfe  religion  dazzles  their 
 eyes ;  and  they  fometimes  are  fo  deluded  by  it,  that  they  look 
 on  fome  of  thefe  imprelfions,  which  hypocrites  tell  of,  as  the 
 brighteft  experiences.  And  though  they  have  experienced 
 no  fuch  things  themfelves,  they  think,  it  is  becaufe  they  are 
 vaftly  lower  in  attainments,  and  but  babes,  in  comparifon  of 
 thefe  flaming  Chriftians.  Yea,  fometimes  from  their  differing 
 fo  much  from  thofe  who  make  fo  great  a  ftaow,  they  doubt 
 whether  they  have  any  grace  at  all.  And  i^  is  a  hard  thing, 
 to  bring  many  well-meaning  people  to  make  proper  diftinc- 
 tions  in  this  cafe  ;   and  efpecially  to  maintain  and  ftand  by 
 
 P  p  them ; 
 
apS  REFLECTIONS     ON    THE 
 
 them ;  throutrh  a  certain  weaknefs  they  unhappily  labour  of, 
 ^'hereby  they  are  liable  to  be  overcome  with  the  glare  of  out- 
 ward appearances.  Thus,  if  in  a  fedate  hour  they  are  by  rea- 
 foning  brought  to  allow  I'uch  and  fuch  diliinftions,  yet  the 
 next  time  they  come  in  the  way  of  the  great  fhow  of  falfe 
 religion,  the  daz/.ling  appearance  fwallows  them  up,  and  they 
 are  carried  away.  Thus  the  devil  by  his  cunning  artifices,  cafily 
 dazzles  the  feeble  fight  of  men,  and  puts  them  beyond  a  capa- 
 city of  a  proper  exercife  of  confideration,  or  hearkening  to 
 the  di"5}^atcs  of  calm  thought,  and  cool  underftanding.  When 
 they  perceive  the  great  aifeftion,  earneft  talk,  ftrong  voice, 
 allured  looks,  vaft  confidence,  and  bold  allertions,  of  thefe 
 empty  afTnming  pref'nders,  they  are  overborne,  lofe  the  pot 
 feflion  of  their  judgment,  and  fay,  "  Surely  thefe  men  are  in 
 "  the  right,  God  is  with  them  of  a  truth :"  and  fo  they  are 
 carried  away,  not  with  light  and  reafon,  but  (like  children) 
 as  it  were  with  a  ftrong  wind. 
 
 This  confounding  all  things  together,  that  have  a  fair 
 /hev/,  is  but  aifling  the  part  of  a  child,  that  going  into  a 
 fhop,  where  a  variety  of  wares  are  expofed  to  fale,  (all  of  a 
 ihining  appearance  ;  f  jme  veflels  of  gold  and  filver,  and  fomc 
 diamonds  and  other  precious  ftones;  and  other  things  that 
 are  toys  of  little  value,  which  are  of  fome  bafe  metal  gilt, 
 or  glafs  polifhed,  and  painted  with  curious  colours,  or  cut 
 like  diamonds),  fhould  cfteem  all  alike,  and  give  as  great  a 
 price  for  the  vile  as  for  the  precious  :  or  it  is  like  the  conduft  of 
 fomc  unficilful  rafh  perfon,  who  finding  himfelf  deceived  by 
 fome  of  the  wares  he  had  bought  at  that  (hop,  ftiould  at  once 
 conclude,  all  he  there  faw  was  of  no  value;  and  purfuant  to 
 fuch  a  conclufion,  when  afterwards  he  has  true  gold  and 
 diamonds  offered  him,  enough  to  enrich  him  and  enable  him 
 to  live  like  a  prince  all  his  days,  he  ihould  throw  it  all  into 
 the  fea. 
 
 But  we  muj}  get  into  another  way.  The  want  of  diftin- 
 guifhing  in  things  that  appertain  to  experimental  religion,  is 
 one  of  the  chief  miferies  of  the  profeffing  world.  It  is  at- 
 tended with  very  many  moft  difmal  confequences :  multitudes 
 of  fouls  are  fatally  deluded  about  themfelves,  and  their  own 
 Hate ;  and  fo  are  eternally  undone :  hypocrites  are  confirm- 
 ed in  their  delufions,  and  exceedingly  puffed  up  with  pride : 
 many  fmcerc  Chriftians  are  dreadfully  perplexed,  darkened, 
 tempted,  and  drawn  afide  from  the  way  of  duty ;  and 
 fometimes  fadly  tainted  with  falfe  religion,  to  the  great  dif- 
 honour  of  Chriftianity,  and  hurt  of  their  own  fouls:  fomc 
 of  the  moft  dangerous  and  pernicious  enemies  of  religion  in 
 
 the 
 
PRECEDING     MEMOIRS.  299 
 
 the  world  (though  called  bright  Chriftians)  are  encoura'jed  and 
 honoured;  who  ought  to  be  difcountenanced  and  fhu  med  by 
 everybody:  and  prejudices  are  begotten  and  confiim-d  in 
 vaft  multitudes,  againft  every  thing  wherein  the  power  and 
 c/Tence  of  godlinefs  confifls;  and  in  the  end  Deifm  and  Athc- 
 ifm  are  promoted. 
 
 III.  The  foregoing  account  of  Mr  Brainerd's  life  may 
 afford  matter  of  convi6lion,  that  there  is  indeed  fuch  a  thing 
 as  true  experimental  religion,  arifing  from  immediate  divine 
 influences,  fupernaturally  enlightening  and  convincing  the 
 mind,  and  powerfully  impreffing,  quickening,  fanftifying, 
 and  governing  the  heart  ;  which  religion  is  indeed  an  amiable 
 thing,  of  happy  tendency,  and  of  no  hurtful  con  fequence  to 
 hvin\^.n  fociety ;  notwithftanding  there  having  been  io  many 
 pretences  and  appearances  of  what  is  called  experimental  vital 
 religion,  that  have  proved  to  be  nothing  but  vain,  pernicious 
 fnthtifiafm. 
 
 if  any  infill,  that  Mr  Brainerd's  religion  was  enthvfiafm, 
 and  nothing  but  a  ftrange  heat  and  blind  fervour  of  mind, 
 arifing  from  the  ftrong  fancies  and  dreams  of  a  notional 
 whimlical  brain;  I  would  afk,  if  it  be  fo,  that  fuch  things  as 
 thefe  are  the  fruits  of  enthufiafm,  viz.  a  great  degree  of 
 honefly  and  fimplicity,  fincere  and  earneft  defires  and  endea- 
 vours, to  know  and  do  whatever  is  right,  and  to  avoid  every 
 thing  that  is  wrong;  an  high  degree  of  love  to  God,  de- 
 light in  the  perfe^ions  of  his  nature,  placing  the  happinefs 
 of  life  in  him  ;  not  only  in  contemplating  him,  but  in  being 
 aftive  in  pleafing,  and  ferving  him ;  a  firm  and  undoubting 
 belief  in  the  Melfiah,  as  the  Saviour  of  the  W'orld,  the  great 
 Prophet  of  God,  aad  King  of  God's  church ;  together  with 
 great  love  to  him,  delight  and  complacence  in  the  way  of  fal- 
 vation  by  him,  and  longing  for  the  enlargement  of  his  king- 
 dom ;  earned  defires  that  God  may  be  glorified  and  the 
 Meffiah's  kingdom  advanced,  whatever  inftruments  are  made 
 ufe  of;  uncommon  refignation  to  the  will  of  God,  and  that 
 under  vafl:  trials  ;  great  and  univerfal  benevolence  to  man- 
 kind, reaching  all  forts  of  perfons  without  diftinftion,  mani- 
 fefted  in  fsveetnefs  of  fpecch  and  behaviour,  kind  treatment, 
 mercy,  liberality,  and  earneft  feeking  the  good  of  the  fouls 
 and  bodies  of  men ;  attended  with  extraordinary  humility, 
 meeknefs,  forgivcnefs  of  injuries,  and  love  to  enemies ;  and 
 a  great  abhorrence  of  a  contrary  fpirit  and  prai5>ice ;  not  only 
 as  appearing  in  tjthers,  but  vvhereinfoever  it  had  appeared  in 
 himfclf;  caufing  the  moil  bitter   repentance,  and  brokenncfs 
 
 P  p  2  of 
 
300  RSFLECrrONS     ON     THE 
 
 of  heart  on  account  of  any  paft  inftanccs  of  fuch  a  <?onduftj 
 a  modeft,  difcrcet,  and  decent  deportment,  among  fuperiors, 
 inferiors,  and  equals;  a  moft  diligent  improvement  of  time^ 
 and  earnefl:  care  to  lofe  no  part  of  it ;  great  watchfulncfs 
 sgainft  ail  forts  of  fin,  of  heart,  fpecch,  and  aOion :  and 
 this  example  and  thefe  endeavours  attended  with  moft  happy 
 fruits,  and  blrffcd  eff.(fts  on  others,  in  humanizing,  civili- 
 zing, and  wonderfully  reforming  and  transforming  fome  of 
 the  mofl  brurifh  favages ;  idle,  immoral,  drunkards,  murder- 
 ers, grofs  idolaters,  and  wizards ;  btinging  them  to  permanent 
 fobriety,  diligence,  devotion,  hontfty,  cunfcientioufnefs,  and 
 charity:  and  the  foregoing  amiable  virtues  and  fuccefsful  la- 
 b  ^urs  all  ending  at  laft  in  a  marvellous  peace,  unmoveable 
 ilability,  calmnefs,  and  relignation,  in  the  fenfible  approaches 
 of  death ;  with  longing  for  the  heavenly  ftate ;  not  only  for 
 the  honours  and  circumflantial  advantages  of  it,  but  above 
 all  for  the  moral  perfection,  and  holy  and  bleifed  employ- 
 ments of  it;  and  thefe  things  in  a  perfon  indifputably  of  good 
 under/landing  and  judgment:  1  fay,  if  all  thefe  things  are 
 the  fruits  of  enthtijiajm,  v  hy  fhould  not  erthufiafm  be 
 thought  a  defirable  and  excellent  thing?  for  what  can  true 
 r(?ligion,  what  can  the  brft  philofophy  do  more?  If  vapours 
 and  whimfy  will  bring  men  to  the  moft  thorough  virtue,  to 
 the  moft  benign  and  fruitful  morality;  and  will  maintain  it 
 through  a  courfe  of  life  (attended  with  many  trials)  without 
 affectation  or  felf-exakation,  and  with  an  earneft  conftant 
 bearing  teftimony  againft  the  wildnefs,  the  extravagances,  the 
 bitttrr  zeal,  a/Tuming  beha\iour,  and  feparating  fpirit  of  en- 
 thufiafts ;  and  will  do  all  this  more  elfeCtually,  than  any  thing 
 elle  has  ever  done  in  any  plain  known  inftance  that  can  be 
 produced ;  if  it  be  fo,  I  fay,  what  caufe  then  has  the  world 
 to  prize  and  pray  for  this  bieflcd  whimficalnefs,  and  thefe  be- 
 nign fort  of  vapours? 
 
 It  would  perhaps  be  a  prejudice  ^vith  fome  againft  the 
 M-hvle  of  Mr  Brainerd's  religion,  if  it  had  begun  in  the  time 
 of  the  lute  religious  commotion;  being  ready  to  conclude 
 (h  )wever  unreafonably)  that  nothing  good  could  take  its  rife 
 fioni  thofe  times.  But  it  %yas  not  fo;  his  converfion  was 
 btfore  thofe  times,  in  a  time  of  general  deadnefs,  (as  has 
 bi  en  before  obferved) ;  and  therefore  at  a  feafon  when  it 
 was  impoffible,  that  he  ftiould  receive  a  taint  from  any  cor- 
 rupt notions,  examples,  or  cuftoms,  that  had  birth  in  thofe 
 times. 
 
 And  whereas  there  are  many  who  are  not  profefted  op- 
 ppfers  of  what  is  called  expenmentfl  religion^  who  yet  doubt 
 
 of 
 
PRECEDING     MEMOIRS.  301 
 
 •f  the  reality  of  it,  from  the  bad  lives  of  fome  profeflbrs ; 
 and  are  ready  to  determine  that  there  is  nothing  in  all  the 
 talk  about  being  horn  again,  being  emptied  of  felf,  brought  /» 
 a  faving  cUfe -with  ChnJ},  &c.  becaufc  many  that  pretend  to 
 ihefe  things,  and  are  thought  by  others  to  have  been  the  fub- 
 jefts  of  them,  manifeft  no  abiding  alteration  in  their  moral 
 difpofition  and  behaviour;  are  as  carelefs,  carnal,  covetous, 
 <5;c.  as  ever ;  yea,  fome  much  worfc  than  ever :  it  is  to  be 
 acknowledged  and  lamented,  that  this  is  the  cafe  with  fome; 
 but  by  the  preceding  account  they  may  be  feniible,  that  it  is 
 not  fo  with  all.  There  are  fome  indifputable  inftances  of 
 fuch  a  change,  as  the  fcripture  fpeaks  of;  an  abiding  great 
 change,  a  "  renovation  of  the  ipirit  of  the  mind,"  and  a 
 *.'  walking  in  newnefs  of  life."  In  the  foregoing  inftancc 
 particularly,  they  may  fee  the  abiding  influence  of  fuch  a 
 work  of  converfion,  as  they  have  heard  of  from  the  word  of 
 God ;  the  fruits  ot  fuch  experiences  through  a  courfe  of  years; 
 under  a  great  variety  of  ciicumflances,  many  changes  ot  ftate, 
 place,  and  company  ;  and  may  fee  the  bkfled  Hue  and  event 
 fdixt  va.  life  and  death. 
 
 IV.  The  preceding  hiftory  ferves  to  confirm  thbfe  do£l:rines 
 ufually  called  the  do^rines  of  grace.  For  if  it  be  allowed 
 that  there  is  truth,  fubftance,  or  value  in  the  main  of  Kx 
 Brainerd's  religion,  it  will  undoubtedly  follow,  thatthofe  doc- 
 trines are  divine :  fince  it  is  evident,  that  the  whole  of  it, 
 from  beginning  to  end,  is  according  to  that  fcheme  of  things ; 
 all  built  on  thofe  apprehenfions,  notions,  and  views,  that  are 
 produced  and  eflablilhed  in  the  mind  by  thofe  doftrines.  He 
 ■was  brought  by  doftrines  of  this  kind  to  his  awakening,  and 
 deep  concern  about  things  of  a  fpiritual  and  eternal  nature; 
 and  by  thefe  doftrines  his  conviftions  were  maintained  and 
 carried  on  ;  and  his  converfion  was  evidently  altogether  agree- 
 able to  this  fcheme,  but  by  no  means  agreeing  with  the  con- 
 trary, and  utterly  inconfiftent  with  the  Arminian  notion  of 
 converfion  or  repentance.  His  converfion  was  plainly  found- 
 ed in  a  clear  ftrong  convi£tion,  and  undoubting  perfuafion 
 of  the  truth  of  thofe  things  appertaining  to  thefe  doftrines, 
 which  Arminians  moft  objeft  againfi:,  and  which  his  own 
 mind  had  contended  mofi  about.  And  his  converfion  was  no 
 confirming  and  perfefting  of  moral  principles  and  habits,  by 
 ufe  and  praftice,  and  his  own  labour  in  an  induftrious  dif- 
 ciplining  himfelf,  together  with  the  concurring  fuggefl:ions 
 and  confpiring  aids  of  God's  Spirit ;  but  entirely  a  fuperna- 
 twral  work,  at  once  turning  him  from  darkncfs  to  marvellous 
 
 light. 
 
3Pa  REFLECTIONS     ON    THE 
 
 light,  and  from  the  power  of  fin  to  the  dominion  of  divine 
 and  holy  principles;  ancffcft,  in  no  regard  produced  by  his 
 ftrength  or  labour,  or  obtained  by  his  virtue  ;  and  not  ac- 
 compliJhed  till  he  was  firft  brought  to  a  full  convi(ftion,  that 
 all  his  own  virtue,  ftrength,  labours,  and  endeavours,  could 
 never  avail  any  thing  to  the  producing  or  procuring  this 
 cffccT:. 
 
 A  very  lirtle  while  before,  his  mind  was  full  of  the  fame 
 cavils  againft  the  doftrincs  of  God's  fovereign  grace,  which 
 are  made  by  Arminians ;  and  his  heart  full  even  of  a  raging 
 oppofition  to  them.  And  God  was  pleafed  to  perform  this 
 good  work  in  him  juft  after  a  full  end  had  been  put  to  this  ca- 
 villing and  oppofition ;  after  he  was  entirely  convinced,  that 
 he  was  dead  in  fin,  and  was  in  the  hands  of  God,  as  the  ab- 
 folutely  fovereign,  unobliged,  fole  difpofer  and  author  of  true: 
 holinefs.  God's  fhewing  him  mercy  at  fuch  a  time,  is  a  con- 
 firmation, that  this  was  a  preparation  for  mercy ;  and  con- 
 Jequentl}',  that  tliefe  things  which  he  was  convinced  of,  were 
 true:  while  he  oppofed  thefe  things,  he  was  the  fubjeft  of  no 
 fuch  mercy ;  though  he  {o  earneftly  fought  it,  and  prayed  for 
 it  with  fo  much  painfulnefs,  care,  and  fVri(flnefs  in  religion  : 
 but  when  once  his  oppofition  is  fully  fubdued,  and  he  is 
 brought  to  fubmit  to  the  truths,  which  he  before  had  oppofed, 
 with  full  convi£lion,  then  the  mercy  he  fought  for  is  granted, 
 with  abundant  light,  great  evidence,  and  exceeding  joy,  and  he 
 reaps  the  fweet  truit  of  it  all  his  life  after,  and  in  the  valley  of 
 the  /hadow  of  death. 
 
 Jn  his  converfion,  he  was  brought  to  fee  the  glory  of  that 
 xjray  of  falvation  by  Chrift,  that  is  taught  in  what  are  called 
 tiie  Jo  brines  cf  grace;  and  thenceforward,  with  unfpeakable 
 joy  and  complacence,  to  embrace  and  acquiefce  in  that  way 
 of  falvation.  He  was  in  his  converfion,  in  all  refpe£fs, 
 brought  to  thofe  views,  and  that  Hate  of  mind,  which  thefe 
 <io£lrines  fhcw  to  be  necefTary.  And  if  his  converfion  was 
 any  real  converfion,  or  any  thing  bcfides  a  mere  whim,  and  if 
 the  religion  of  his  life  was  any  thingelfebuta  ieriesof  freaks  of 
 awhimfical  mind,  then  this  one  grand  principle,  on  which  de- 
 pends the  whole  difference  between  Calviniils  and  Arminians, 
 is  undeniable,  viz.  that  the  grace  or  virtue  of  truly  good 
 men,  not  only  differs  from  the  virtue  of  others  in  degree, 
 but  even  in  nature  and  kind.  If  ever  Mr  Brainerd  was  truly 
 turned  from  fin  to  God  at  all,  or  ever  became  truly  religious, 
 none  can  reafonably  doubt  but  that  his  converfion  was  at  the 
 time  when  he  fu ppofed  it  to  be  :  the  change  he  then  experi- 
 enced, was  evidently  the  greateft  moral  change,  that  ever  he 
 
 pafTed 
 
PRECEDING     MEMOIRS.  303 
 
 pafTcd  under ;  and  he  was  then  apparently  firft  brought  to 
 that  kind  of  religion,  that  remarkable  new  habit  and  temper 
 of  mind,  which  he  held  all  his  life  after.  The  narration 
 /hews  it  to  be  different,  in  nature  and  kind,  from  all  that  ever 
 lie  was  the  fubject  of  before.  It  was  evidently  wrought  at 
 once  without  fitting  and  preparing  his  mind,  by  gradually 
 convincing  it  mjre  aiJ  more  of  the  faine  truths,  and  bringing 
 it  nearer  and  nearer  to  fuch  a  temper:  for  it  was  foon  after 
 his  mini  had  been  remarkably  full  of  blafphemy,  and  a  vehe- 
 ment exercife  of  fenfible  enmity  againft  God,  and  great  op- 
 pofition  to  thofe  truths,  which  he  was  now  brought  with  his 
 wiiole  foul  to  embrace,  and  red:  in,  as  divine  and  gloriou^ 
 aul  to  place  his  happinefs  in  the  contemplation  and  imprc»vc- 
 ment  of.  And  he  himfelf  (who  was  furely  beft  able  to  judge) 
 declares,  that  the  difpjlitions  and  affections,  which  were 
 then  given  him,  and  thenceforward  maintained  in  him,  were 
 moft  fenfibly  and  certainly,  perfeftly  different,  in  their  na- 
 ture, from  all  that  ever  he  was  the  fubjeft  of  before,  or  that 
 he  ever  had  any  conception  of.  This  he  ever  ftood  to,  and 
 was  peremptory  in,  (as  what  he  certainly  knew),  even  to  his 
 death.  He  muft  be  looked  upon  as  capable  of  judging ;  he 
 had  opportunity  to  know  :  he  had  praftifed  a  great  deal  of  re- 
 ligion before,  was  exceeding  fhift  and  confcientious,  and  had 
 continued  fo  for  a  long  time ;  had  various  religious  affeftions, 
 with  which  he  often  flattered  himfelf,  and  fometimes  pleafed 
 himfelf  as  being  now  in  a  good  cftate  :  and  after  he  had  thofe 
 new  experiences,  that  began  in  his  converfion,  they  were 
 continued  to  the  end  of  his  life  ;  long  enough  for  hini 
 thoroughly  to  obferve  their  nature,  and  compare  them  with 
 what  had  been  before.  Doubtlefs  he  was  compos  mentis  ;  and 
 was  at  leaft  one  of  fo  good  an  underftanding  and  judgment, 
 as  to  be  pretty  well  capable  of  difcerning  and  comparing  the 
 things  that  paffed  in  his  own  mind. 
 
 It  is  further  obfervable,  that  his  religion  all  along  operated 
 in  fuch  a  manner  as  tended  to  confirm  his  mind  in  the  doc- 
 trines of  God's  abfolute  fovereignty,  man's  univerfal  and  en- 
 fire  dependence  on  God's  power  and  grace,  <6c.  The  more  his 
 religion  prevailed  in  his  heart,  anxl  the  fuller  he  was  of  divine 
 love,  and  of  clear  and  delightful  views  of  fpiritual  things,  and 
 the  more  his  heart  was  engaged  in  God's  fervice ;  the  more 
 fenfible  he  was  of  the  certainty  and  the  excellency  and  import- 
 ance of  thefe  truths,  and  the  more  he  was  affefted  with  them, 
 arid  rejoiced  in  them.  And  he  declares  particularly,  that 
 when  he  lay  for  a  long  while  on  the  verge  of  the  eternal 
 'World,  often  expefting  to  be  in  that  world  in  a  few  minute?, 
 
 yet 
 
304  REFLECTIONS     OK    THE 
 
 yet  at  the  fame  time  enjoying  great  ferenity  of  mind,  and 
 clcarnefs  of  thought,  and  being  moft  apparently  in  a  pe- 
 culiar manner  at  a  diftance  from  an  enthufiaftical  frame,  he 
 "  at  that  time  faw  clearly  the  truth  of  thofc  great  doftrines 
 "  of  the  gofpel,  which  are  juftly  ftiled  the  do^-'mej  of  grace, 
 "  and  never  felt  himfelf  fo  capable  of  demonftrating  the  truth 
 «*  of  them." 
 
 So  that  it  is  very  evident,  Mr  Brainerd's  religion  was 
 wholly  correfpondent  to  what  is  called  the  Caivinifitcal fchemCf 
 and  was  the  eSz^  of  thofc  doctrines  applied  to  his  heart :  and 
 certainly  it  cannot  be  denied,  that  the  effect  was  good,  unlefs 
 
 we  turn  Atheifts,  or  Deifts. 1  would  afk,   whether  there 
 
 be  any  fuch  thing,  in  reality,  as  Chr'Jlian  devotion?  If  there  be, 
 what  is  it?  what  is  its  nature?  and  what  its  juft  mcafure? 
 Ihould  it  not  be  in  a  great  degree  ?  we  read  abundantly  in  Icrip- 
 ture,  of  "loving  God  with  all  the  heart,  with  all  the  foul,  with 
 "  all  the  mind,  and  with-  all  the  ftrength,  of  delighting  in 
 "  God,  of  rejoicing  in  the  Lord,  rejoicing  with  joy  unfpeak- 
 "  able  and  full  of  glory,  the  foul's  magnifying  the  Lord, 
 **  thirfting  for  God,  hungering  and  thirfting  after  righteouf^ 
 "  nefs,  the  foul's  breaking  for  the  longing  it  hath  to  God's 
 "  judgments,  praying  to  God  with  groanings  that  cannot  be 
 "  uttered,  mourning  for  fin  with  a  broken  heart  and  contrite 
 "  fpirit,"  6c.  How  full  is  the  book  of  Pfalms,  and  other 
 parts  of  fcripture,  of  fuch  things  as  thefe !  Now  wherein 
 do  thefe  things,  as  cxprefled  by  and  appearing  in  Mr  Brainerd, 
 either  the  things  themfelves,  or  their  effects  and  fruits,  differ 
 from  the  fcripture-reprefentations?  Thefe  things  he  was 
 brought  to  by  that  ftrange  and  wonderful  transformation  of 
 the  man,  which  he  called  his  converfion.  And  do  not  this 
 well  agree  with  what  is  fo  often  faid  in  Old  Teftament  and 
 New,  concerning  the  "  giving  of  a  new  heart,  creating  a 
 "  right  fpirit,  a  being  renewed  in  the  fpirit  of  the  mind,  a 
 *'  being  fanctified  throughout,  becoming  a  new  creature  ?" 
 ^c.  Now  where  is  there  to  be  found  an  Arminian  conver- 
 Hon  or  repentance,  confifting  in  fo  great  and  admirable  a 
 change?  Can  the  Arminians  produce  an  inftance,  within  this 
 age,  and  fo,  plainly,  within  our  reach  and  view,  of  fuch  a 
 reformation,  fuch  a  transformation  of -a  man,  to  fcriptural 
 «!cvotion,  heavenly  raindednefs,  and  true  Chriflian  mora- 
 lity, in  one  that  before  lived  without  thefe  things,  on  the 
 foot  of /A(?/r  principles,  and  through  the  influence  of  their 
 do<ftrines? 
 
 And  here,  is  worthy  to  be  confidercd,  not  only  the  effect 
 •f  Calviniftical  doctrines  (as  they  are  called)  on  Mr  Brainerd 
 
 himfelf, 
 
PRECEDING    M  E  M  O  I  k  S.  305 
 
 liiinfelf,  but  alfo  the  cffeft  of  the  fame  dot^rineS;,  as  taught 
 and  inculcated  by  hi.n,  on  others.  It  is  abundantly  pretend- 
 ed and  afferted  of  late,  that  thefe  do6lrines  tend  to  under- 
 mine the  very  foundations  of  all  religion  and  morality,  and 
 to  enervate  and  vacate  all  reafonable  motives  to  the  exercile 
 and  praftice  of  them,  and  lay  invincible  ftumbling-blockb  be- 
 fore Infidels,  to  hinder  their  embracing  Chriftianity  ;  and  chat 
 the  contrary  doctrines  are  the  fruitful  principles  of  virtue  and 
 goodnefs,  fet  religion  on  its  right  bafis,  reprefent  it  in  an 
 amiable  light,  give  its  motives  tneir  full  force,  and  recom- 
 mend it  to  the  rcafon  and  common  fenfe  of  mankind. —  But 
 where  can  they  find  an  inftance  of  io  great  and  fignal  an  ef- 
 feft  of  their  doctrines,  in  bringing  Infidels,  who  were  at  fuch 
 a  diftance  from  all  that  is  civil,  human,  fober,  rational,  and 
 Chriftian,  and  (o  full  of  inveterate  prejudices  againil  thefe 
 things,  to  fuch  a  degree  of  humanity,  civility,  exercife  of 
 reafon,  felf-denial,  and  Chriftian  virtue?  Arminians  place 
 religion  in  morality  •  let  them  bring  an  inftance  of  their  doc- 
 trines producing  fuch  a  transformation  of  a  people  in  point 
 of  morality.  It  is  ftrange,  if  the  allwife  God  fo  orders  things 
 in  his  providence,  that  reafonable  and  proper  means,  and  his 
 9iun  means,  which  he  himfelf  has  appointed,  (hould  in  no 
 known  remarkable  inftance  be  inftrumental  to  produce  Co 
 good  an  effeft ;  an  effect  fo  agreeable  to  his  own  word  and 
 mind,  and  that  very  effeft  for  which  he  appointed  thefe  ex- 
 cellent means ;  that  they  fhould  not  be  fo  fuccefsful,  as  thofe 
 means  which  are  not  his  own,  but  very  contrary  to  them,  and 
 of  a  contrary  tendency ;  means  that  are  in  themfelves  very 
 abfurd,  and  tend  to  root  all  religion  andviitue  out  of  the 
 world,  to  promote  and  eftablifti  infidelity,  and  to  lay  an  in- 
 fuperable  ftumbling-block  before  Pagans,  to  hinder  their  crri- 
 bracing  the  gofpel:  I  fay,  if  this  be  the  true  ftate  of  the  cafe, 
 it  is  certainly  pretty  v/onderful,  and  an  event  worthy  of  foaie 
 attention. 
 
 I  know,  that  many  will  be  ready  to  fay,  "  It  is  too  foon 
 "  yet,  to  glory  in  the  work,  that  has  been  wrought  among  Mr 
 "  Brainerd's Indians ;  it  is  bcft  to  wait  and  fee  the  final  event ; 
 *'  it  may  be,  all  will  come  to  nothing  by  and  by."  1  o  which 
 I  anfwer,  (not  to  infift,  that  it  will  not  follow,  according  to 
 Arminian  principles,  they  are  not  now  true  Chriftians,  really 
 pious  and  godly,  though  they  fiould  fall  away  and  come  to 
 nothing),  that  I  never  fuppofed,  every  one  of  thofe  Indians, 
 who  in  profefTion  renounced  their  Heathenifm  and  vifibly  em- 
 braced Chriftianity,  and  have  had  fome  appearance  of  piety, 
 v.ill  finally  prove  true  converts:  if  two  thirds,  or  indeed  one 
 
 Q,  ci  half 
 
3o6  REFLECTIONS     ON     THE 
 
 half  of  them  (as  great  a  proportion  as  there  is  in  the  parable 
 of  the  ten  virgins)  fhould  perfeverc;  it  will  be  fufficient  to 
 fhew  the  work,  wrought  among  them,  to  have  been  truly 
 admirable  and  glorious.  But  fo  much  of  permanence  of  their 
 religion  has  already  appeared,  as  fhews  it  to  be  fomething  elfe 
 befides  an  Indian  humour  or  good  mood,  or  any  tranfient  ef- 
 fe<ft  in  the  conceits,  notions,  and  affeftions  of  thefe  ignorant 
 people,  excired  at  a  particular  turn,  by  artful  management. 
 For  it  is  now  more  than  three  years  ago,  that  this  work  be- 
 gan among  them,  and  a  remarkable  change  appeared  in  many 
 of  them ;  hnce  which  time  the  number  of  vifible  converts 
 has  greatly  increafed  :  and  by  repeated  accounts,  from  feve- 
 rai  hands,  they  ftiU  generally  perfevere  in  diligent  religion 
 and  ftrict  virtue.  I  think  worthy  to  be  here  infcrted,  a  letter 
 from  a  young  gentleman,  a  candidate  for  the  miniftry,  one  of 
 thofe  before  mentioned,  appointed  by  the  honourable  com- 
 miilioners  in  Bolton,  as  miffionaries  to  the  Heathen  of  the  Six 
 Nations,  fo  called;  who,  by  their  order,  dwelt  with  Mr  John 
 Brainerd  among  thefe  Chriftian  Indians,  in  order  to  their  be- 
 ing prepared  for  the  bufinefs  of  their  million.  The  letter 
 was  written  from  thence,  to  hit)  parents  here  in  Northamptony 
 and  is  as  follows. 
 
 Bethel,  in  Nevj-Jerfey^  Jan.  14.  1747-8,' 
 Honoured  and  dear  parents, 
 
 AFter  a  long  and  uncomfortable  journey,  by  reafon  of  baJ- 
 weather,  I  arrived  at  Mr  Brainerd's,  the  6th  of  this 
 inftant;  where  I  defign  to  flay  this  winter:  and  as  yet,  upon 
 many  accounts,  am  well  fatisfied  with  my  coming  hither. 
 The  ftate  and  circumftances  of  the  Indians,  fpiritual  and 
 temporal,  much  exceed  what  I  expected.  I  have  endeavoured 
 to  acquaint  myfelf  with  the  ftate  of  the  Indians  in  general, 
 with  particular  perfons,  and  with  the  fchool,  as  much  as  the 
 fhort  time  I  have  been  here  would  admit  of.  And  notwith- 
 ftanding  my  expeftations  were  very  much  raifed,  from  Mr 
 David  Brainerd's  Journal,  and  from  particular  informations 
 from  him ;  yet  I  muft  confefs,  that  in  many  refpefts,  they 
 are  not  equal  to  that  which  now  appears  to  me  to  be  true, 
 concerning  the  glorious  work  of  divine  grace  amongft  the 
 Indians. 
 
 The  evening  after  I  came  to  town,  I  had  opportunity  to 
 fee   the    Indians  together,    whilft:  the  Reverend   Mr  Arthur 
 preached  to  them  :   at  which   time  there   appeared  a  very  ge- 
 nei*al  and  uncommon  ferioufnefs  and  folemnity  in  the  congre- 
 gation : 
 
PRECEDING    MEMOIRS.  307 
 
 gation  :  and  this  appeared  to  me  to  be  the  effeft  of  an  inward 
 fenfe  of  the  importance  oi'  divine  truths,  and  not  becaulc  they 
 were  hearing  a  flranger:  which  was  abundantly  confirmed  to 
 me  the  next  Sabbath,  when  there  was  the  fame  devout  at- 
 tendance on  divine  fcrvlce,  and  a  furprifmg  fokmnity  appear- 
 ing in  the  performance  of  each  pait  of  divine  woiftiip.  And 
 fome,  who  are  hopefully  true  Chriflians,  appear  to  have  been 
 at  that  time  much  enlivened  and  comforted  ;  not  from  any 
 obfervable  commotions  then,  but  from  converfation  after- 
 wards: and  others  feemed  to  be  under  prcifing  concern  for 
 their  fouls.  I  have  endeavoured  to  acquaint  myfelf  with 
 particular  perfons ;  many  of  whom  feem  to  be  very  humble 
 and  growing  Chriflians  ;  although  fome  of  them,  (as  I  am  in- 
 formed), were  before  their  converfion  moft  monlboufly  wick- 
 ed. 
 
 Religious  converfation  feems  to  be  very  pleafing  and  de- 
 lightful to  many,  and  efpecially  that  which  relates  to  the  ex- 
 ercifes  of  the  heart.  And  many  here  do  not  feem  to  be  real 
 Chriflians  only,  but  growing  Chriflians  alio;  as  well  in  doc- 
 trinal, as  experimental  knowledge.  Befides  my  converfation 
 with  particular  perfons,  I  have  had  opportunity  to  attend  up- 
 on one  of  Mr  Brainerd's  catechetical  lectures ;  where  I  was 
 furprifed  at  their  rcadinefs  in  anfwering  queflions  which  they 
 had  not  been  ufed  to ;  although  Mr  Braiuerd  complained 
 much  of  their  uncjmm.on  deficiency.  It  is  furprifmg,  to  fee 
 this  people,  who  not  long  fince  were  led  captive  by  Satan  at 
 his  will,  and  living  in  the  practice  of  all  manner  of  abomina- 
 tions, without  tlie  leafl  fenfe  even  of  moral  honefly,  yet  now 
 living  fjberly  and  regularly,  and  not  fceking  every  man  his 
 own,  but  every  man,  in  fome  fenfe,  his  neigf  hour's  good ; 
 and  to  fee  thofe,  who  but  a  little  while  pafl,  knew  nothing 
 of  the  true  God,  now  worfliipping  him  in  a  folemn  and  devout 
 manner ;  not  only  in  public,  but  in  their  families  and  in  fe- 
 cret;  which  is  manifcftly'  the  cafe,  it  being  a  difficult  thing 
 to  walk  out  in  the  woods  in  the  morning,  without  diflurbing 
 perfons  at  their  fecret  devotion.  And  it  feems  wonderful, 
 that  this  fhould  be  the  cafe,  not  only  with  adult  perfons,  but 
 with  children  alfo.  It  is  obfervable  here,  that  many  children, 
 (if  not  the  children  in  general),  retire  into  fecret  places  to 
 pray.  And,  as  far  as  at  prefent  I  can  judge,  this  is  not  the 
 ef?e(fl  of  cuflom  and  faflrion,  but  of  real  ferioufnefs  and 
 thoughtfulnefs  abmt  their  fouls. 
 
 I  have  frequently  gone  into  the  fchool,  and  have  fpent  con- 
 fiderable  time  there  amongfl  the  children  ;  and  have  been  fur- 
 prifed to  fee,  not  only   their  diligent  attendance  upon  the 
 
 Q^q  2  bufmefs 
 
3o8  REFLECTIONS     ON     THE 
 
 bufinefs  of  the  fchool,  but  alfo  the  proficiency  they  have 
 made  in  it,  in  reading  and  writing,  and  in  their  catcchifms  of 
 divers  forts.  It  feems  to  be  as  pleafmg  and  as  natural  to  thefe 
 children,  to  have  their  books  in  their  hands,  as  it  docs  for 
 many  others  to  be  at  play.  I  have  gone  into  an  houfc  where 
 there  has  been  a  number  of  children  accidentally  gathered  to- 
 gether ;  and  obferved,  that  every  one  had  his  book  in  hi* 
 hand,  and  was  diligently  ftudying  of  it.  There  is  to  the 
 DJinber  of  about  thirty  of  thefe  children,  who  can  anfwer  to 
 all  the  queftions  in  the  AlTembly's  catechifm;  and  the  bigger 
 part  of  them  are  able  to  do  it  with  the  proofs,  to  the  fourth 
 commandment.  I  wiih  there  were  many  fuch  fchools :  I 
 confefs,  that  I  never  was  acquainted  with  fuch  an  one,  in 
 many  refpefts.  Oh  that  what  God  has  done  here,  may 
 prove  to  be  the  beginning  of  a  far  more  glorious  and  cxtcn- 
 live  work  of  grace  among  the  Heathen ! 
 
 1  am  your  vhdient  and  dut'ful/on, 
 
 Job  Strong, 
 
 P  S.  Since  the  date  of  this,  I  have  had  opportunity  to 
 attend  upon  another  of  Mr  Brainerd's  catechetical  le<Jlures : 
 and  truly  I  was  convinced,  that  Mr  Brainerd  did  not  complain 
 b:fore  of  his  people's  defefts  in  anfwering  to  queftions  pro- 
 pofcd,  without  reafon :  for  although  their  anfwers  at  that 
 time  exceeded  my  expc£lations  very  much  ;  yet  their  per- 
 formances at  this  lefture  very  much  exceeded  them.." 
 
 Since  this,  we  have  had  accounts  from  time  to  time,  and 
 fome  very  late,  which  ihew  that  religion  ftill  continues  in 
 profperous  and  raoft  defirable  circumftanccs  among  thefe  In- 
 dians. 
 
 V.  Is  there  not  much  in  the  preceding  memoirs  of  Mr 
 Brainerd  to  teach,  and  excite  to  duty,  us  who  are  called  to 
 the  work  ot  the  mini/try,  and  all  that  are  candidates  for  that 
 great  work?  What  a  deep  fenfe  did  he  fecm  to  have  of  the 
 greatnefs  and  importance  of  that  work,  and  \\ith  what  weight 
 did  it  lie  on  his  mind!  how  fenfible  was  he  of  his  own  infuf- 
 ficiency  f  ;r  this  work  ;  and  how  great  was  his  dependence  on 
 God's  fufiicicncy  !  how  folicitous,  that  he  might  be  fitted  for 
 it '  and  to  this  end,  how  much  time  did  he  fpend  in  prayer 
 and  fading,  as  well  as  reading  and  meditation  ;  giving  himjetf 
 to  thefe  thincs!  how  did  he  dedicate  his  whole  life,  all  his 
 powers  and  talents  to  God;  and  forfake  and  renoupce  the 
 
 W#r4d;, 
 
PRECEDING     MEMOIRS.  309 
 
 world,  with  all  its  pleafing  and  cnfnaring  enjoyments,  tKa; 
 hp  might  be  wholly  at  liberty,  to  fcrve  CI  1  rift  in  this  work  ; 
 and  to  "pleafe  him  who  had  cholen  him  to  be  a  loldier,  un. 
 "  dcr  the  Captain  of  our  lalvatioa  ! "  With  what  folicitude,  fo» 
 le.nnity,  and  diligence  did  he  devote  himlelt  to  God  our  Savi- 
 our, and  leek  his  prefence  and  bleifing  in  fecret,  at  the  time 
 of  his  ord  nation  !  and  how  <iid  his  whole  heart  appear  to  be 
 conftantly  engaged,  his  whole  time  employed,  and  his  whole 
 ilicngth  Ipent  in  the  bufmefs  he  then  folemnly  undertook  and 
 
 ■wao  publicly  fet  apart  to! And  his  hiftory    (hews  us  the 
 
 right  way  to  fuccefs  in  the  work  of  the  miniftry.  He  fought 
 it,  as  a  ref olute  foldier  feeks  vidlory,  in  a  fiege  or  battle  ;  or 
 as  a  man  that  runs  a  race,  for  a  great  prize.  Animated  with 
 love  to  Chrift  and  fouls,  how  did  he  "  labour  always  fcrvent- 
 "  ly,"  not  only  in  word  and  doftrine,  in  public  and  private, 
 but  in  prayers  day  and  night,  "wreftling  with  God''  in  fecret, 
 and  "travailing  in  birth,"  with  nnutterable  groans  and  agonies, 
 **  until  Chrift  were  formed"  in  the  hearts  of  the  people  to 
 whom  he  was  fent !  how  did  he  thirft  for  a  blelTing  on  his 
 miniftry  ;  and  "  watch  for  fouls,  as  one  that  muft  give  ac- 
 count !"  how  did  he  "  go  forth  in  the  ftrength  of  the  Lord 
 "  God;"  feeking  and  depending  on  a  fpecial  influence  of  the 
 Spirit  to  ailift  and  fucceed  him !  and  what  was  the  happy 
 fruit  at  laft,  though  after  long  wailing,  and  many  daik  and 
 difcouraging  appearances!  like  a  true  fon  of  Jac  b,  he  perfe- 
 vered  in  v.'reftling,  through  ail  the  darknefs  of  the  night,  un- 
 til the  breaking  of  the  day. 
 
 And  his  example  of  labouring,  praying,  denying  himfelf^ 
 and  enduring  hardnefs,  with  unlainting  refc;luti^.in  and  pa- 
 tience, and  his  faithful,  vigilant,  and  piudent  conducl  in  many 
 other  refpe(51s,  (which  it  would  be  tv^o  long  now  particularly 
 to  recite),  may  afford  inftrudion  to  nvjjlonaries  in  particular. 
 
 VI.  The  foregoing  account  of  Mr  Braincid's  life  may  af- 
 ford inftrufiion  to  Chrljiluns  in  reneral ;  as  it  ftiews,  in  many 
 refpecls,  the  righ^  way  of  p  a^ijing  religion,  in  order  to 
 obtaining  the  ends  of  it,  and  receiving  the  bcnefts  of  it ;  or 
 how  Chriftians  ftiould  "  run  the  race  let  before  them,"  if 
 they  would  not  "  run  in  vain,  or  run  as  uncertainly,"  but 
 v'ould  honour  God  in  the  world,  adorn  their  profefTion,  be 
 ferviceable  to  mankind,  have  the  comforts  of  religion  while 
 ihey  live,  be  free  from  difquieting  doubts  and  dark  apprehen- 
 fions  about  the  ftate  of  their  fouls;  enjoy  peace  in  the  ap- 
 proaches of  death,  and  "  Snifli  their  courfe  with  joy." In 
 
 general,  he   much  recommended,  for  this  purpofe,  the  re- 
 demption 
 
3IO  REFLECTIONS     ON    THE 
 
 demptlon  of  time,  great  diligence  in  the  bufinefs  of  the 
 Chriftian  life,  ivatchfulnefi,  6cc.  And  he  very  remarkably 
 exemplified  thefe  things. 
 
 But  particularly,  his  example  and  fuccefs  with  regard  to 
 one  duty  in  fpecial,  may  be  of  great  ufc  to  both  miniders  and 
 private  Chriftians  ;  I  mean  the  duty  o(  fecret  fojiing.  The 
 reader  has  feen,  how  much  Mr  Brainerd  recommends  this 
 duty,  and  how  frequently  he  exercifed  himfelf  in  it;  nor 
 can  it  well  have  efcapcd  obfervation,  how  much  he  was  own- 
 ed and  blelTed  in  it,  and  of  what  great  benefit  it  evidently  was 
 to  his  foul.  Among  all  the  many  days  he  fpent  in  fecret 
 fafting  and  prayer,  that  he  gives  an  account  of  in  his  diary y 
 there  is  fcarce  an  inftance  of  one,  but  what  was  either  attend- 
 ed or  foon  followed  with  apparent  fuccefs,  and  a  remarkable 
 bleffing,  in  fpecial  incomes  and  confolations  of  God's  Spirit ; 
 
 and  very  often,  before  the  day  was  ended. But  it  muft 
 
 be  obferved,  that  when  he  fet  about  this  duty,  he  did  it  in 
 good  earneft  ;  "  ftirring  up  himfelf  to  take  hold  of  God,"  and 
 **  continuing  inftanr  in  prayer,"  with  much  of  the  fpirit  of 
 Jacob,  who  laid  to  the  Angel,  "  I  will  not  let  thee  go,  except 
 ,**  thou  blefs  me.''' 
 
 VII.  There  is  much  in  the  preceding  account  to  excite 
 and  encourage  God's  people  to  earned  prayers  and  endea- 
 vours for  the  advancement  and  (nlargejnent  of  the  kingdom 
 of  Chrifi  in  the  ivojid.  Mr  Brainerd  fet  us  an  excellent  ex- 
 ample in  this  refpeft :  he  fought  the  profperity  of  Zion  with 
 all  his  might :  he  preferred  Jerufalem  above  his  chief  joy. 
 How  did  his  foul  long  for  it,  and  pant  after  it !  and  how 
 earnefily  and  often  did  he  wreftle  with  God  for  it !  and  hovr 
 far  did  he,  in  thefe  defires  and  prayers,  feem  to  be  carried  be- 
 yond all  private  and  felfifhviewsl  being  animated  by  a  pure 
 love  to  Chiifl,  an  earneft  defire  of  his  glory,  and  a  difintereft- 
 ed  afFeflion  to  the  fouls  of  mankind. 
 
 The  confideration  of  this,  not  only  ought  to  be  an  incite- 
 ment to  the  people  of  God,  but  may  alfo  be  a  juft  encourage' 
 tnent  to  them,  to  be  much  in  feeking  and  praying  for  a  gene- 
 ral outpouring  of  the  Spirit  of  God,  and  extenfive  revival  of 
 religion.  I  confefs,  that  God's  giving  fo  much  of  a  fpirit 
 of  prayer  for  this  mercy  to  fo  eminent  a  fervant  of  his,  and 
 exciting  him,  in  fo  extraordinary  a  manner,  and  with  fuch 
 Vehement  thirftings  of  foul,  to  agonize  in  prayer  for  it,  from 
 time  to  time,  through  the  courfe  of  his  life,  is  one  thing, 
 among  others,  which  gives  me  great  hope,  that  God  has  a 
 dellgi^  of  accompli/hing  fomething  very  glorious  for  the  in- 
 
 tereft 
 
PRECEDING     MEMOIRS.  31* 
 
 tcrcfl:  of  his  church  before  long.  One  fuch  inftance  as  this, 
 I  conceive,  gives  more  encouragement,  than  the  common,- 
 coid,  formal  prayers  of  thoufands.  As  Mr  Brainerd's  defires 
 and  prayers  for  the  coming  of  Chrifl's  kingdom,  were  very 
 fpecial  and  extraordinary ;  fo,  I  think,  we  may  reafonably 
 hope,  that  the  God,  who  excited  thofe  defires  and  prayers, 
 will  anfvver  them  with  fomething  fpecial  and  extraordinary* 
 And  in  a  particular  manner,  do  i  think  it  worthy  to  be  taken 
 notice  of  for  our  encouragement,  that-  he  had  his  heart  (as 
 he  declared)  unufually,  and  beyond  what  had  been  before,  drawn 
 out  in  longings  and  prayers  for  the  ilourifhing  of  ChriA's 
 kingdom  on  earth,  when  he  was  in  the  approaches  oi  death; 
 tni  that  with  his  dying  breath  he  did  as  it  were  breathe  out 
 his  departing  foul  into  the  bofom  of  his  Redeemer,  in  prayers 
 and  pantings  after  this  glorious  event ;  exphing  in  a  very 
 great  hope  that  it  would  foon  begin  to  be  fulfiiied.  And  I 
 wilh,  that  the  thoughts  which  he  in  his  dying  ftate  exprelfed 
 oi  that  explicit  agreement,  and  vifible  union  of  God's  people, 
 in  extraordinary  prayer  for  a  general  revival  of  religion,  lately 
 propofed  in  a  memorial  from  Scotland,  which  has  been  dit 
 perl'ed  among  us,  may  be  well  confidered  by  thofe  that  hither- 
 to have  not  feen  fit  to  fall  in  with  that  propofal. But  I  for- 
 bear to  fay  any  more  on  this  head,  having  already  largely  pu- 
 blifhed  my  thoughts  upon  it,  in  a  difcourfe  written  onpurpofe 
 to  promote  that  affair;  which,  I  confefs,  1  wifh  that  every 
 one  of  my  readers  might  be  fupplied  with  ;  not  that  my  ho- 
 nour, but  that  this  excellent  defign  might  be  promoted. 
 
 As  there  is  much  in  Mr  Brainerd's  life  to  encourage  Chri- 
 flians  to  feek  the  advancement  of  Chrifl's  kingdom,  in  gene- 
 ral ;  fo  there  is,  in  particular,  to  pray  for  the  converfion  of 
 the  Indians  on  this  continent,  and  to  exert  themfelves  in  the 
 ufe  of  proper  means  for  its  accompliftiment."  For  it  appears, 
 that  he  in  his  unutterable  longings  and  wreftlings  of  foul  for 
 the  Ilourifhing  of  religion,  had  his  mind  peculiarly  intent  on 
 the  converfion  and  falvation  of  thefe  people,  and  his  heart 
 more  efpecially  engaged  in  prayer  for  them.  And  if  we  con- 
 fider  the  degree  and  manner  in  which  he  from  time  to  time, 
 fought  and  hop-?d  for  an  extenfive  work  of  grace  among  them, 
 I  think,  we  have  reafon  to  hope,  that  the  wonderful  things, 
 which  God  wrought  among  them  by  him,  are  but  a  forerun- 
 ner of  fomething  yet  much  more  glorious  and  extenfive  of 
 that  kind  ;  and  this  may  juftly  be  an  encouragement,  to  well- 
 difpofed  charitable  perfons,  to  "  honour  the  Lord  with  their 
 "  fubftance,"  by  contributing,  as  they  are  able,  to  promote 
 the  fpreading  of  the  go fpel  among  them  ;  and  this  alfo  may 
 
 incite 
 
312  REFLECTIONS     ON    THfi 
 
 incite  and  encourage  gentlemen  who  are  incorporatee!,  tftd 
 intruded  with  the  care  and  difpofal  of  thofe  liberal  benefac^ 
 tions,  which  have  already  been  made  by  pious  perfons,  to 
 that  end ;  and  likewife  the  milTionaries  themfelves,  that  arc 
 or  may  be  employed ;  and  it  may  be  of  direction  unto  both, 
 as  to  the  proper  qualificatijns  of  mifli  )naries,  and  the  proper 
 xneafures  to  be  taken  in  order  to  their  iuccefs. 
 
 One  thing  in  particular,  I  would  tike  occafion  from  the 
 foregoing  hiftory  to  mention  and  propofe  to  the  confideration 
 of  fuch  as  have  the  care  of  providing  and  fending  m':Jfionaries 
 aaaong  favages;  viz.  Whether  it  would  not  ordinarily  be  beft 
 to  fend  two  together?  It  is  pretty  manifefl:,  that  Mr  Brainerd's 
 going,  as  he  did,  alone  into  the  howling  wildernefs,  was  one 
 great  occaiion  of  fuch  a  prevailing  of  melancholy  on  his 
 iriind ;  which  was  his  greateft  difadvantage.  He  was  much 
 in  fpeaking  of  it  himfelf,  vrhen  he  was  here  in  his  dying  flatej 
 and  cxprefTed  himfelf,  to  this  purpofe,  that  none  could  con- 
 ceive of  the  difadvantage  a  miffionary  in  fuch  circumftances 
 vras  under,  by  being  alone ;  efpecially  as  it  expofed  him  to 
 difcouragement  and  melancholy  :  and  fpoke  of  the  wifdom  of 
 Chrift  in  fending  forth  his  difciples  by  two  and  two;  and  left 
 it  as  his  dying  advice  to  his  brother,  never  to  go  to  Suf^ 
 quahannah,  to  travel  about  in  that  remote  wildernefs,  to 
 preach  to  the  Indians  there,  as  he  had  often  done,  without  the 
 company  ofzfellovj  mijponary. 
 
 VIII.  One  thing  more  may  not  be  unprofitably  obfer- 
 ved  in  the  preceding  account  of  Mr  Brainerd;  gjid  that  is 
 the  fpecial  and  mnarkable  difpofal  of  divine  providence, 
 ■with  regard  to  the  circuniflt^nces  of  his  laft  jicknefs  and 
 death. 
 
 Though  he  had  been  long  infirm,  his  conftitution  being  much 
 broken  by  his  fatigues  and  hardfliips ;  and  though  he  was  often 
 brought  very  low  by  illnefs,  before  he  left  Kaunaumeek,  and 
 alfo  while  he  lived  at  the  Forks  of  Delaware  :  yet  his  life 
 was  preferved,  till  he  had  feen  that  which  he  had  fo  long  and 
 greatly  defired  and  fought,  a  glorious  woik  of  grace  among 
 tir.e  Indians,  and  had  received  the  wifhed-for  blefling  of  God 
 on  his  labours.  Though  as  it  were  "  in  deaths  oft,"  yet  he 
 lived  to  behold  the  happy  fruits  of  the  long  continued  travail 
 of  his  foul  and  labour  of  his  body,  in  the  wonderful  conver- 
 flon  of  many  of  the  Heathen,  and  the  happy  effect  of  it  in  the 
 great  change  of  their  converfation,  with  many  circumftanccs 
 which  afforded  a  fair  profpeft  of  the  continuance  of  God's 
 felefTing  upon  them  ;  as  may  appear  by  what  I  /hall  prefently 
 
 further 
 
PRECEDING    MEMOIRS.  313 
 
 further  obferve. Thus  he  did  not  *'  depart,  till  his  eyes 
 
 **  had  feen  God's  falvation." 
 
 Though  it  was  the  plcafure  of  God,  that  he  fliould  be  taken 
 off  from  his  labours  among  that  people  whom  God  had  made 
 him  a  fpiritual  father  to,  who  were  fo  dear  to  him,  and 
 whofe  fpiritual  welfare  he  was  fo  greatly  concerned  for ;  yet 
 this  was  njt  before  they  were  well  initiated  and  inftrufted  in  the 
 Chriftian  religion,  thoroughly  weaned  from  their  old  heathen- 
 ilh  and  brutili  notions  and  pra<ftices,  and  all  their  prejudices 
 and  jealoufies,  which  tenJed  to  keep  their  minds  unfettled, 
 ■were  fully  removed;  and  they  were  confirmed  and  fixed  in 
 the  Chriftian  faith  and  manners,  were  formed  into  a  church, 
 had  ecclefiaftical  ordinances  and  difcipline  introduced  and 
 fettled ;  were  brought  into  a  good  way  with  refpeft  to  the 
 eJucation  of  children,  had  a  Ichoolrnafler  fent  to  them  in  pro- 
 vidence, excellently  qualified  for  the  bufinefs,  and  had  a  fchool 
 fet  up  and  eflablifhcd,  in  good  order,  among  them  ;  had  been 
 well  brought  ofFfiom  their  former  idle,  flrolling,  fottifti  way 
 of  living ;  had  removed  from  their  former  fcattered  uncertain 
 habitations ;  and  were  colledled  in  a  town  by  themfelves,  on 
 a  good  piece  of  land  of  their  own;  were  introduced  into  the 
 way  of  living  by  hulbanJiy,  and  begun  to  experience  the  be- 
 nefits of  it,  cc-  rhefe  things  were  but  juff  brought  to  pafs 
 by  his  indefatigable  application  and  care,  and  then  he  was  taken 
 off  from  his  work  by  illnefs.  If  this  had  been  but  a  little 
 fooner,  they  would  by  no  means  have  been  fo  well  prepared 
 for  fuch  a  difpenfation;  and  it  probably  would  have  been  un- 
 (peakably  more  t )  the  hurt  of  their  fpiritual  interef^,  and  of 
 the  caufe  of  Chriftianity  among  them. 
 
 The  time  and  circumftances  of  his  illncfs  were  fo  ordered, 
 that  he  had  juft  opportunity  to  finifh  his  Journal,  and  prepare 
 it  for  the  prefs;  giving  an  account  of  the  marvellous  dilplay 
 of  divine  power  and  grace  among  the  Indians  in  New- Jerfey, 
 and  at  the  Forks  of  Delaware :  his  doing  which  was  a  thing 
 of  great  confequence,  and  therefore  uiged  upon  him  by  the 
 currefpondents,  who  have  honoured  his  Journal  with  a  pre- 
 face. The  world  being  particularly  and  juftly  informed  of 
 that  affair  by  Mr  Brairerd,  before  his  death,  a  foundation 
 was  hereby  laid  for  a  concern  in  others  for  that  caufe,  and  pro- 
 per care  and  meafures  to  be  taken  for  the  maintaining  it  after 
 his  death.  As  it  has  a£lualiy  proved  to  be  of  great  influence 
 and  benefit  in  this  refpeft;  it  having  excited  and  engaged  many 
 in  thofe  parts,  and  alfo  more  diftant  parts  of  America,  to  ex- 
 ert themfelves  for  the  upholding  and  promoting  fo  good  and 
 glorious  a  -^vrvr]-,  remarkably  opening  their  hearts  and  hands 
 
 "  R  r        "  t^ 
 
ii4  REFLECTIONS     ON     THt 
 
 to  that  end:  and  rot  only  in  America,  but  in  Great  Britain^ 
 where  that  Journal  (which  ii  the  fame  that  I  have  earneftly 
 recommended  to  my  readers  to  po/Tefs  themfelves  of)  has  been 
 nn  occafion  of  fome  large  benetafiions,  made  for  the  pro- 
 moting the  intereft  of  Chriftianity  among  the  Indians. If 
 
 Mr  Brainerd  had  been  taken  ill  but  a  little  fooner,  he  had  not 
 been  able  to  complete  this  his  Journal,  and  prepare  a  copy  for 
 the  prefs. 
 
 He  was  not  taken  off  from  the  work  of  the  miniftry  a- 
 mong  his  people,  till  his  brotki-r  was  in  a  capacity  and  cir- 
 cumdances  to  fucceed  him  in  his  care  of  them  :  who  fucceeds 
 him  in  the  like  fpirit,  and  undel"  whofe  prudent  and  faithful 
 care  his  congregation  has  flourifhed,  and  been  very  happy, 
 iince  he  left  them ;  and  probably  could  not  have  been  fo  well 
 provided  for,  otherwife.  If  Mr  Brainerd  had  been  dlfabled 
 fooner,  his  brother  would  by  no  means  have  been  ready  to 
 iland  up  in  his  place ;  having  taken  his  firft  degree  at  college 
 but  about  that  very  time  that  he  was  feized  with  his  fatal  con- 
 lumption. 
 
 Though  in  that  winter  that  he  lay  fick  at  Mr  Dikinfon's 
 in  Elifabeth-Town,  he  continued  for  a  long  time  in  an  ex- 
 tremely low  ftate,  fo  that  his  life  was  almoft  defpaired  of^ 
 and  his  ftate  was  fometimes  fuch  that  it  was  hardly  expelled 
 he  would  live  a  day  to  an  end ;  yet  his  life  was  fpared  a  while 
 longer;  he  lived  to  fee  his  brother  arrived  in  New-Jerfey, 
 being  come  to  fucceed  him  in  the  care  of  his  Indians;  and 
 he  himfelf  had  opportunity  to  aiTifl  in  his  examination  and 
 introduftion  into  his  bufmefs;  and  to  commit  the  condufl  of 
 his  dear  people  to  one  whom  he  well  knew,  and  could  put 
 confidence  in,  and  ufe  freedom  with  in  giving  him  particular 
 inftruftions  and  charges,  and  under  whofe  care  he  could  leave 
 his  congregation  with  great  cheerfulnefs. 
 
 The  providence  of  God  was  remarkable  in  fo  .ordering  of 
 it,  that  before  his  death  he  fhould  take  a  journey  into  New- 
 England,  and  go  to  Bofton :  which  was,  in  many  refpefts, 
 of  very  great  and  happy  confequence  to  the  intereft  of  re- 
 ligion, and  efpecially  among  his  own  people.  By  this 
 means,  as  has  been  obferved,  he  was  brought  into  acquaint- 
 ance with  many  perfons  of  note  and  influence,  miniflers  and 
 others,  belonging  both  to  the  town  and  various  parts  of  the 
 country;  and  had  opportunity,  under  the  beft  advantages, 
 to  bear  a  teftimony  for  God  and  true  religion,  and  againft 
 thofe  falfe  appearances  of  it  that  have  proved  moft  pernicious 
 to  the  irterefts  of  Chrift's  kingdom  in  the  land.  And  the  pro- 
 vidence of  God  is  particularly  obfervable  in  this  circum- 
 
 ftance 
 
PRECEDING.  MEMOIRS.  315 
 
 ^ance  of  the  teftimony  he  there  bore  for  true  religion,  viz, 
 that  he  there  was  brought  fo  near  the  g}-ave,  and  continued 
 for  fo  long  a  time  on  the  very  brink  of  eternity ;  and  from 
 time  to  time,  looked  on  himfelf,  and  was  looked  on  by  ethers, 
 as  juft  leaving  the  world;  and  that  in  thefe  circumftances 
 he  (hould  be  fo  particularly  dire<5led  and  aflifted  in  his  thoughts 
 and  views  of  religion,  to  difllnguiOi  between  the  true  and 
 the  ftlfe,  with  fuch  clearnefs  and  evidence;  and  that  after 
 this  he  (hould  be  unexpeiftedly  and  furprifingly  reflored  and 
 ftrengthened,  fo  far  as  to  be  able  to  converfe  freely ;  and 
 have  fuch  opportunity,  and  fpecial  occafions  to  declare  the 
 fentiments  he  had  in  thefe,  which  were,  to  human  apprehen- 
 fion,  his  dying  circumftances;  and  to  bear  his  teftimony  con- 
 cerning the  nature  of  true  religion,  and  concerning  the  mi(^ 
 chievous  tendency  of  its  mofl:  prevalent  counterfeits  and  falfe 
 appearances ;  as  things  he  had  a  fpecial,  clear,  diftinft  view 
 of  at  that  time,  when  he  expelled  in  a  few  minutes  to  be  in 
 eternity;  and  the  certainty  and  importance  of  which  were 
 then,  in  a  peculiar  manner,  imprelfed  on  his.  mind. 
 
 Among  the  happy  confequences  of  his  going  to  Bollon, 
 were  thofe  liberal  benefactions  that  have  been  mentioned, 
 which  were  made  by  pious  difpofed  perfons,  for  the  maintain- 
 ing and  promoting  the  intereft:  of  religion  among  his  people  : 
 and  alfo  the  meeting  of  a  number  of  gentlemen  in  Bolton,  of 
 note  and  ability,  to  confult  upon  meafures  for  that  purpofe; 
 who  were  excited  by  their  acquaintance  and  converfation  with 
 Mr  Brainerd,  and  by  the  account  of  thegreat  things  God  had 
 wrought  by  his  miniftry,  to  unite  themfelves,  that  by  their 
 joint  endeavours  and  contributions  they  might  promote  the 
 kingdom  of  Chriil,  and  the  fpiritual  good  of  their  fellow^ 
 creatures,  among  the   Indians  in  New-Jerfey,  and  elfewhere. 
 
 It  was  aUb  remarkable,  that  Mr  Brainerd  ftiould  go  to  Bo- 
 /lon  at  that  time,  after  the  honourable  commiflioners  there, 
 of  the  corporation  in  London  for  propagating  the  gofpel  in 
 New-England  and  parts  adjacent,  had  received  Br  William's 
 legacy  for  the  maintaining  of  two  miffionarlcs  among  the 
 Heathen  ;  and  at  a  time  when  they  having  concluded  on  a 
 million  to  the  Indians  of  the  Six  Nations  (fo  called),  were  lock- 
 ing out  for  fit  perfons  t  j  be  employed  in  that  important  fcr- 
 vice.  This  proved  an  occafion  of  their  committing  to  him 
 tlie  afFair  of  finding  and  recommending  fuitable  perlons : 
 which  has  proved  a  fuccefsful  means  of  two  perfons  being 
 found  and  actually  appointed  to  that  bufinefs;  v^ho  feera  to 
 be  well  qualified .  for  it,  and  to  have  their  hearts  greatly  en- 
 gaged in  it;  one  of  which  has  been  folemnly  ordained  to  that 
 
 R  r  2  work 
 
Si6        REFLECTIONS     ON    THE 
 
 work  in  Bofton,  and  is  now  gone  forth  to  one  of  thofrtribes, 
 who  have  appeared  well  difpofed  to  his  reception ;  it  being 
 judged  not  convenient  for  the  other  to  go  till  the  next  fpriug, 
 by  reafon  of  his  bodily  infirmity  *. 
 
 Thefe  happy  confequences  of  Mr  Brainerd's  journey  to 
 Bofton  would  have  been  prevented,  in  cafe  he  had  died,  when 
 he  was  brought  {o  near  to  death  in  New-Jerfty.  Or  if  after 
 he  came  firft  to  Northampton,  (where  he  was  much  at  a  lofs 
 and  long  deliberating  which  way  to  bend  his  courfe),  he  had 
 determined  not  to  go  to  Bofton. 
 
 The  providence  of  God  was  obfervable  in  his  going  to  Bo- 
 fton at  a  time  when  not  only  the  honourable  commiffn'ners 
 were  feeking  miffionaries  to  the  Six  Nations,  but  jul>  attcr 
 his  Journal,  which  gives  an  account  of  his  labours  and  fuccefs 
 among  the  Indians,  had  been  received  and  fpread  in  Bofton  ; 
 whereby  his  name  was  known,  and  the  minds  of  ferious 
 people  were  well  prepared  to  receive  his  pcrfon,  and  the  tefti- 
 mony  he  there  gave  for  God ;  to  exert  themfelves  for  the  up- 
 holding and  promoting  the  intcrcft  of  religion  in  his  congre- 
 gation, and  amongft  the  Indian?  elfewhere ;  and  to  regard  his 
 judgment  concerning  the  qualifications  of  miflicnaries,  6c. 
 If  he  had  gone  there  the  fall  before,  (when  he  had  intended  to 
 have  made  his  journey  into  New- England,  but  was  prevented 
 by  a  fudden  great  increafe  of  his  illnefs),  it  would  not  have  been 
 likely  to  have  been  in  any  meafure  to  fo  good  effeft:  and  alfo 
 if  he  had  not  been  unexpeftedly  detained  in  Bofton ;  for  when 
 he  went  from  my  houfe,  he  intended  to  make  but  a  very 
 ftiort  ftay  there ;  but  divine  providence  by  his  being  brought 
 fo  low  there,  detained  him  long;  thereby  to  make  way  for 
 the  fulfilling  its  own  gracious  defigns. 
 
 The  providence  of  God  was  remarkable  in  fo  ordering, 
 that  although  he  was  brought  fo  very  near  the  grave  in  Bo- 
 fton, that  it  was  not  in  the  leaft  expefted  he  would  ever  come 
 alive  out  of  his  chamber;  yet  he  wonderfully  revived,  and 
 was  pieferved  feveral  months  longer  :  fo  that  he  had  oppor- 
 tunity to  fee,  and  fully  to  converfe  with  both  his  younger 
 
 *  The  appointment  pf  thefe  gentlemen  to  this  miflion  has  been 
 kltherto  much  fmiled  on  in  providence;  as  in  other  refpeAs,  fo  par- 
 ticularly in  the  wonderful  opening  of  the  hearts  of  many  to  contri- 
 bute liberally  to  (p  excc  llent  a  dtfign ;  befides  the  benef*<ftions  in 
 Bolton,  a  number  of  perfons  at  Northampton  with  much  cheer ful- 
 nefs  have  given  about  L.  i6o  (old  tenor);  and  a  particular  per- 
 fun  in  Springfield  has  devoted  «  cooCderable  part  of  his  eftate  to 
 this  iatcreft, 
 
 brethren 
 
PRECEDING     MEMOIRS.  317 
 
 irethrett  before  he  died;  which  was  a  thing  he  greatly  de- 
 fire  J  ;  and  clpecially  to  fee  his  brother  John,  \*ith  -whom  was 
 left  the  care  of  his  congregation ;  that  he  might  by  him  be 
 fully  informed  of  their  ftatc,  and  might  leave  with  him  fuch 
 inlh  unions  and  direftions  as  were  requifite  in  order  to  their 
 fpiritual  welfare,  and  to  fend  to  them  bis  dying  charges  and 
 counfels.  And  he  had  alfo  opportunity,  by  means  of  tr^is  fuf- 
 penfion  of  his  death,  to  find  and  recommend  a  couple  of  per- 
 fons  fit  to  be  employed  as  mijprjnaries  to  the  Six  Nations,  as 
 had  been  defired  of  him. 
 
 Thus,  although  it  was  the  pleafure  of  a  fovereign  Go^^ 
 that  he  (huuld  be  tal>en  away  from  his  congregation,  the 
 people  that  he  had  begotten  through  the  gofpel,  who  were 
 fo  dear  to  him;  yet  it  was  granted  to  him,  that  before  he 
 died  he  fhould  fee  them  well  provided  for^  every  way  :  he  faw 
 them  provided  for  with  one  to  inftrufl  them,  and  take  care 
 of  their  fouls ;  his  own  brother,  whom  he  could  confide  in  J 
 he  faw  a  good  foundation  laid  for  the  fupport  of  the  ichool  a- 
 mong  them ;  thofe  things  that  before  were  wanting  in  order 
 to  it,  being  fupplied :  and  he  had  the  profpeft  of  a  charitable 
 fociety  being  eftabliftied,  of  able  and  well-difpofed  per  fons, 
 who  feem  to  make  the  fpiritual  intereft  of  his  congregation 
 their  own  ;  whereby  he  had  a  comfortable  view  of  their  being 
 well  provided  for,  for  the  future  :  and  he  had  alfo  opportuni- 
 ty to  leave  all  his  dying  charges  with  his  fucceflbr  in  the  pa- 
 ftoral  care  of  his  people,  and  by  him  to  fend  his  dyin^  coun- 
 fels to  them,  Thus  God  granted  him  to  fee  all  things  hap- 
 pily fettled,  or  in  a  hopeful  wsy  of  being  fo,  before  his  death, 
 with  refpeft  to  his  dear  people. — And  whereas  not  only  his 
 ov/n  congregation,  but  the  fouls  of  the  Indians  in  North- 
 America  in  general,  were  very  dear  to  him,  and  he  had  greatly 
 fet  his  heart  on  the  propagating  and  extending  the  kingdom 
 of  Chrift  among  them;  God  was  pleafed  to  grant  to  him, 
 (however  it  was  his  will,  that  he  fhould  be  taken  away,  and 
 lb  Ihould  njt  be  the  immediate  inftrument  of  their  inftruc- 
 lion  and  converfion,  yet),  that  before  his  death,  he  fliould 
 fee  unexpected  extraordinary  provifion  made  for  this  alfo. 
 And  it  is  remarkable,  that  God  not  only  allowed  him  to  fee 
 fuch  provifion  made  for  the  maintaining  the  intereft  of  re- 
 ligion among  his  own  people,  and  the  propagation  of  it  elfe- 
 An'herc ;  but  honoured  him  by  making  him  the  means  or  oc- 
 cafion  of  it.  So  that  it  is  very  probable,  however  Mr  Brai- 
 nerd,  during  the  laft  four  months  of  his  life,  v/as  ordinarily 
 in  an  extremely  weak  and  low  ftate,  very  often  fcarcely  able 
 |o  fpeak;  yet  that  he  was  ra»de  the  inftrwmeat  ornaeans  of 
 
 much 
 
3x8  REFLECTIONS     ON     THE 
 
 much  more  good  In  that  fpace  of  time,  than  he  would  hav* 
 been  if  he  had  been  well,  and  in  full  ftrength  of  body.  Thus 
 God^s  poiver  was  manifefted  in  his  iveahttefs,  and  the  life  of 
 Chrifi  was  manifefted  in  his  mortal  fiejh. 
 
 Another  thing,  wherein  appears  the  merciful  difpofal  of 
 providence  with  refpeft  to  his  death,  was,  that  he  did  not 
 die  in  the  wildernefs,  among  the  favages,  at  Kaunaumeek, 
 •or  the  Forks  of  Delaware,  or  at  Sulquahannah ;  but  in  a 
 place  where  his  dying  behaviour  and  fpeeches  might  be  ob- 
 ierved  and  remembered,  and  fome  account  given  of  them  for 
 the  benefit  of  furvivers ;  and  alio  where  care  might  be 
 taken  of  him  in  his  ficknefs,  and  proper  honours  done  him 
 at  his  death. 
 
 The  providence  of  Gpd  is  alfo  worthy  of  remark,  in  fo 
 over  ruling  and  ordering  the  matter,  that  he  did  not  finally 
 leave  abfolutc  orders  for  the  entire  fupprefiing  of  his  private 
 papers  y  as  he  had  intended  and  fully  rcfolved,  inlomuch 
 tliat  all  the  importunity  of  his  friends  could  fcarce  re- 
 Inain  him  from  doing  \t,  when  fick  at  Bofton.  And  one 
 thing  relating  to  this  is  peculiarly  remarkable,  viz.  that  his 
 brother,  a  little  before  his  death,  fliould  come  from  the  Jer- 
 fcys  uncxpedled,  and  bring  his  diary  to  him,  though  he  had 
 received  no  fuch  order.  So  that  he  had  opportunity  of  ac- 
 cefs  to  thefe  his  referved  papers,  and  for  reviewing  the 
 fame ;  without  which,  it  appears,  he  would  at  laft  have 
 ordered  them  to  be  wholly  fupprefled  :  but  after  this,  he 
 tlic  more  readily  yielded  to  the  dehres  of  his  friends,  and 
 v/as  willing  to  leave  them  in  their  hands  to  be  difpofed  of  as 
 they  thought  might  be  moft  for  God's  glory  :  by  which  means, 
 *'  he  being  dead,  yet  fpeaketh,"  in.  thefe  memoirs  of  his 
 life,  taken  from  thofe  private  writings:  whereby  it  is  to  be 
 hoped  he  may  ftill  be  as  it  were  rhe  inftrumcnt  of  m.uch  pro- 
 moting the  interefl  of  religion  in  this  world ;  the  advance- 
 r.icnt  of  which  he  to  much  defired,  and  hoped  would  be  ac- 
 compli fhed  after  his  death. 
 
 If  thele  circunifrances  of  Mr  Brainerd's  death  be  duly 
 eonfidercd,  1  doubt  not  but  ,they  will  be  acknowledged  as  a 
 riorable  inllance  of  God's  fatherly  care,  and  covenant-faith- 
 luinefs  tovs'ai'ds  them  that  are  devoted  to  him,  and  faithful- 
 ly ferve  him  v  hile  they  live  ;  whereby  "  he  never  fails  nor 
 **  forfakes  ther.,  but  is  -with  ^^^?77  living  and  dying;  fo  that 
 "  whether  they  ii' e,  thev  live  to  tbij  Lord;  or  whether  they 
 *'  die,  they  die   to  the   Lord;"  and  both  in  life   and  death 
 
 they  are  owned  and  taken  care  of  as   his. Mr  Brainerd 
 
 himfclf,  as  was  befoiq  obltrted,  was  much  in  taking  nptice 
 
 (when 
 
PRECEDING    MEMOIRS.  319 
 
 (when  near  his  end)  of  the  merciful  circumftances  of  his 
 death  ;  and  faid,  from  time  to  time,  that  "  God  had  granted 
 "  him  all  his  defire." 
 
 And  I  would  not  conclude  my  obfervations  on  the  merci- 
 ful circumftances  of  Mr  Brainerd's  death,  without  acknow- 
 ledging with  thank fulnefs,  the  gracious  difpenfation  of  pro- 
 vidence  to  me  and  my  family,  in  fo  ordering,  that  he  (though 
 the  ordinary  place  of  his  abode  was  more  than  two  hundred 
 miles  diftant)  fhould  be  call  hither,  to  my  houfe,  in  his  laft 
 ficknefs,  and  (hould'die  here :  fo  that  we  had  opportunity 
 for  much  acquaintance  and  converfation  with  him,  and  to 
 fhew  him  kindnefs  in  fuch  circumftances,  and  to  fee  his  dy- 
 ing behaviour,  to  hear  his  dying  fpeeches,  to  receive  his  dy- 
 ing counsels,  and  to  have  the  benefit  of  his  dying  prayers. 
 May  God  in  infinite  mercy  grant,  that  we  may  ever  retain  a 
 proper  remembrance  of  thefe  things,  and  make  a  due  im- 
 provement of  the  advantages  we  have  had,  in  thefe  refpefts ! 
 The  Lord  grant  alfo,  that  the  foregoing  account  of  Mr  Brai- 
 nerd's life  and  death  may  be  for  the  great  fpiritual  benefit  of 
 all  that  fliall  read  it,  and  prove  a  happy  means  of  promoting 
 the  rivival  of  true  religion  in  thefe  parts  of  the  world!  Amen, 
 
 F    i    N    I    S. 
 
Mi ra  hill  a  Dei  inter  Indicos*^ 
 
 O     R, 
 
 The  RISE  and  PROGRESS 
 
 O  F     A 
 
 Remarkable  Work  of  G  r  a  c  e 
 
 Amongfl  a  NuxMBER.  of  the  INDIANS 
 In  the  Provinces  of  New-Jersey  and  Pensylvania, 
 
 Juftly    REPRESENTED     in    a 
 
 JOURNAL 
 
 itept  by  order  of  the  Honourable  Soctety  (in  Scotland)  for 
 propagating  Christian  Knowledge. 
 
 With  fome  general  REMARKS. 
 Bv      DAVID      BRAINERD, 
 
 Minifter  of  the  Gofpel,  and  Miflionary  from  the  faid  Society. 
 
 Published  by  the  Reverend  and  \^^orthy  Correfpondents  of 
 the  faid  Society.     With  a  Preface  by  them. 
 
 in  Iv.  13.  Inflead  of  the  thorn  (hall  come  up  the  fir-tree,  and  inftead    of  the 
 
 brier  (hall    come    up    the    myrtle-tree  :  and  it  Ihall  be  to  the    Lord  for  a 
 
 name,  for  an  ever!a(^!ng  (ign  that  (hall  not  be  cut  off. 
 If  !xv.  t.    I  am  fought  of  them  that  artceJ  not  for  me:  I    am    found  of  them 
 
 that  (ought  me  not :  I  fitid.   Behold  me,  behold  me,  unto  a  nation  that  was 
 
 not  called  by  my  name. 
 Plal.  cxlv.  10.  ti.  All  thy  works   fliall    praife    thee,   O   Lord,  and  thjr    faints 
 
 fhall  blefs  thee.    They  (hall  Ipeak  of  t!ie  glory  of  thy  kingdom,  and  talk  of 
 
 thy  power. 
 
 Printed  in  the  Year  MDCCT.XV. 
 
THE 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 TH  E  defign  of  this  publication,  is  to  give 
 God  the  glory  of  his  diftinguifhing 
 grace,  and  gratify  the  pious  curiolity  of  thofe 
 who  are  waiting  and  praying  for  that  blcfled 
 time,  when  the  Son  of  God,  in  a  more  ex- 
 tenfive  fenfe  than  has  yet  been  accomplifhcd, 
 Ihall  receive  "  the  Heathen  for  his  inheritance, 
 "  and  the  uttermoft  parts  of  the  earth  for  a  poA 
 "  feffion." 
 
 Whenever  any  of  the  guilty  race  of  mankind 
 are  awakened  to  a  juft  concern  for  their  eternal 
 intereft,  are  humbled  at  the  footftool  of  a  fo- 
 vereign  God,  and  are  perfuaded  and  enabled  to 
 accept  the  offers  of  redeeming  love,  it  muft  al- 
 ways be  acknowledged  a  wonderful  work  of 
 divine   grace,    which   demands    our    thankful 
 
 praifes. But  doubtlefs  it  is  a  more  afFedling 
 
 evidence  of  almighty  power, — a  more  illuftrious 
 difplay  of  fovereign  mercy,  when  thofe  are  en- 
 lightened with  the  knowledge  of  falvation,  who 
 have  for  many  ages  dwelt  in  the  grolTefl  darkneis 
 and  Heathenifm,  and  are  brought  to  a  cheerful 
 fubjedlion  to  the  government  of  our  divine  Re- 
 deemer, who  from  generation  to  generation  had 
 
 S  f  2  remained 
 
324        THE    PREFACE. 
 
 remained  the  voluntary  (laves  of  "  the  prince  o£ 
 "  darknefs." 
 
 This  is  that  delightful  fcene  which  will  pre- 
 fent  itfelf  to  the  reader's  view,  while  he  atten- 
 tively perufes  the  following  pages.  Nothing 
 certainly  can  be  more  agreeable  to  a  benevolent 
 and  religious  mind,  then  to  fee  thofe  that  were 
 funk  in  the  moft  degenerate  ftate  of  human  na- 
 ture, at  once,  not  only  renounce  thofe  barbarous 
 cujftoms  that  they  had  been  inured  to  from 
 their  infancy,  but  furprifingly  transformed  into 
 the  characfler  of  real  and  devout  Chriitians. 
 
 This  mighty  change  was  brought  about  by 
 the  plain  and  faithful  preaching  of  the  gofpel, 
 attended  with  an  uncommon  effufion  of  the  di- 
 vine Spirit,  under  the  miniftry  of  the  Reverend 
 Mr  David  Brainerd,  a  Mitlionary  employed 
 by  the  Honourable  Society  in  Scotland,  for  propa- 
 gating Christian  Knowledge. 
 
 And  furely  it  will  adminifter  abundant  mat- 
 ter oi praife  and  thankfgi'vmg  to  that  honourable 
 body,  to  find  that  their  generous  attempt  to  fend 
 the  gofpel  among  the  Indian  nations  upon  the 
 borders  of  New-York,  New-Jerfey,  and  Penfyl- 
 vania,  has  met  with  fuch  furprifing  fuccefs. — 
 
 It  would  perhaps  have  been  more  agreeable 
 to  the  tafte  of  politer  readers,  if  the  follow- 
 ing Journal  had  been  caft  into  a  different  me- 
 thod, and  formed  into  one  connecfl  narrative. — 
 But  the  worthy  author  amidft  his  continued 
 labours,  had  no  time  to  fpare  for  fuch  an  un- 
 dei  taking.— Pefides,  the  pious  reader  will  take  a 
 pecv'liar  pleafure  to  fee  this  work  defcribed  in 
 \ib  native  Lmplicity,  and  the  operations  of  the 
 
 Spirit 
 
THE    PREFACE.        32^ 
 
 Spirit  upon  the  minds  of  thefe  poor  benighted 
 Pagans,  laid  down  juft  in  the  method  and  or- 
 der in  which  they  happened. — This,  it  mufl:  be 
 confefTed,  will  occafion  frequent  repetitions ;  but 
 thefe,  as  they  tend  to  give  a  fuller  view  of 
 this  amazing  difpenfation  of  divine  grace  in 
 its  rife  and  progrefs,  we  truft,  will  be  eaiily 
 forgiven. 
 
 When  we  fee  fuch  numbers  of  the  moft  ig^ 
 norant  and  barbarous  of  mankind,  in  the  fpace 
 of  a  few  months,  "  turned  from  darknefs  to  ' 
 *'  light,  and  from  the  power  of  fin  and  Sataa 
 *'  unto  God,"  it  gives  us  encouragement  to  wait 
 and  pray  for  that  bleffed  time,  when  our  vido- 
 rious  Redeemer  fhall,  in  a  more  fignal  manner 
 than  he  has  yet  done,  difplay  the  "  banner  of  his 
 "  crofs,"  march  on  from  *'  conquering  to  con- 
 "  qaer,  till  the  kingdoms  of  this  world  are  be- 
 *'  come  the  kingdoms  of  our  Lord  and  of  his 
 "  Chriil." — Yea,  we  cannot  but  lift  up  our  heads 
 with  joy,  and  hope  that  it  may  be  the  dawn  of 
 that  bright  and  illuiLrious  day,  when  the  Sun  of 
 RIGHTEOUSNESS  fhall  "  arife  and  lliine  from 
 *'  one  end  of  the  earth  to  the  other ;"— when, 
 to  ufe  the  language  of  the  infpired  prophets, 
 ^'  the  Gentiles  Ihall  come  to  his  light,  and  kings 
 *'  to  the  brightnefs  of  his  rifing;"  in  confe- 
 quence  of  which,  "  the  wildernefs  and  folitary 
 "  places  fhall  be  glad,  and  the  defert  rejoice  and 
 "  bloffom  as  the  rofe." 
 
 It  is  doubtlefs  the  duty  of  all,  in  their  diffe- 
 rent flations,  and  according  to  their  refpeclive 
 capacities,  to  ufe  their  utmofl  endeavours  to 
 jbring  forward  this  promifed— this  defired  day. 
 
 ——There 
 
326 
 
 THE    PREFACE. 
 
 There  is  a  great  want  oi fchoolmajlers  among 
 
 thefe  Chriftianized  Indians,  to  inftrudl  their 
 youth  in  the  Englijh  language,  and  the  principles 
 of  the  Chrijiian  faith :  for  this,  as  yet,  there  is 
 no  certain  provifion  made ;  if  any  are  inclined 
 to  contribute  to  fo  good  a  defign,  we  are  per- 
 fuaded  they  will  do  an  acceptable  fervice  to  the 
 "  kingdom  of  the  Redeemer."  And  we  earned- 
 ly  defire  the  mod  indigent  to  join,  at  lead,  in 
 their  wifhes  and  prayers,  that  this  ivork  may 
 pro/per  more  and  more,  till  the  "  whole  earth 
 ^'  is  filled  with  the  glory  of  the  Lord." 
 
 The  CORRESPONDENTS. 
 
THE 
 
 RISE  and  PROGRESS 
 
 o  r   A 
 Remarkable  WORK  of  GRACE,   6*c. 
 
 Crofweekfung,  in  New- Jcrfcy,  June  19.  1745. 
 
 HAVING  fpent  moft  of  my  time  for  more  than  a 
 year  part  amongft  the  Indians  in  the  Forks  of  Dela- 
 ware in  Penfylvania ;  and  having  in  that  time  made 
 two  journeys  to  Sufquahannah  river,  far  back  in  that  pro- 
 vince, in  order  to  treat  with  the  Indians  there,  refpefting 
 Chriftianity ;  and  not  having  had  any  confiderable  appearance 
 offpecial  fuecefs  in  either  of  thofe  places,  which  damped  my 
 fpirits,  and  was  not  a  little  difcouraging  to  me;  upon  hearing 
 that  there  was  a  number  of  Indians  in  and  about  a  place  call- 
 ed (by  the  Indians)  Crofweekfung  in  New-Jerfey,  near  four- 
 fcore  miles  fouth-eaftward  from  the  Forks  of  Delaware,  I 
 determined  to  make  them  a  vifit,  and  fee  what  might  be  done 
 towards  the  Chriftianizing  of  themj  and  accordingly  arrived 
 among  them  this  day. 
 
 I  found  very  few  perfons  at  the  place  I  vifited,  and  per- 
 ceived the  Indians  in  thefe  parts  were  very  much  fcattered, 
 there  being  not  more  than  two  or  three  families  in  a  place, 
 and  thefe  fmall  fettlements  fix,  ten,  fifteen,  twenty,  and 
 thirty  miles,  and  fome  more,  from  the  place  I  was  then  at. 
 However,  I  preached  to  thofe  few  I  found,  who  appeared 
 well  difpofed,  and  not  inclined  to  object  and  cavil,  as  the  In- 
 dians had  frequently  done  otherwhere. 
 
 When  I  had  concluded  my  difcourfe,  I  informed  them 
 (there  being  none  but  a  few  women  and  children)  that  I  would 
 willingly  vifit  them  again  the  next  day.  Whereupon  they 
 readily  fet  out,  and  travelled  ten  or  fifteen  miles,  in  order  to 
 give  notice  to  fome  of  their  friends  at  that  diflance.     Thefe 
 
 women, 
 
j28        DiVlNfi     GRACE    DISPLAYED 
 
 xvomen,  like  the  woman  of  Samaria,  feemed  dcfirous  thac 
 others  might  "  fee  the  man  that  told  them  what  they  had 
 "  done"  in  their  lives  pafl,  and  the  mifery  that  attended  their 
 idolatrous  ways. 
 
 June  20.  Vilited  and  preached  to  the  Indians  again  as  I  pro*' 
 pofed.  Numbers  more  were  gathered  at  the  invitations  of  their 
 friends,  who  heard  me  the  day  before.  Thefc  alfo  appeared 
 as  attentive,  orderly,  and  well  difpofcd  as  the  others.  And 
 none  made  any  objeftion,  as  Indians  in  other  places  have 
 ufually  done. 
 
 June  22.  Preached  to  the  Indians  again.  Their  number' 
 which  at  firft  con fifted  of  about  feven  or  eight  perfons,  was 
 now  increafed  to  near  thiity. 
 
 There  was  not  only  a  f  )lemn  attention  among  them,  buC 
 fome  confiderable  impreflions  (it  was  apparent)  were  niade 
 npon  their  minds  by  divine  truths.  Sc^me  began  to  feci  their 
 mifery  and  periHiing  ftate,  and  appeared  concerned  for  a  de- 
 liverance from  it. 
 
 Lord's  day,  June  23.  Preached  to  the  Indians,   and  fpen& 
 
 the  day  with  them. Their  number  rtill  increafed ;  and  all 
 
 with  one  confent  feemed  to  rejoice  in  my  coming  among 
 them.  Not  a  word  of  oppofition  was  heard  from  any  of 
 thera  againft  Chriftianity,  although  in  times  paft  they  had 
 been  as  oppofite  to  any  thing  of  that  nature,  as  any  Indians 
 whatfoever.  And  fome  of  them  not  many  months  before, 
 were  enraged  with  my  interpreter  becaufe  he  attempted  to 
 teach  them  fomething  of  Chriftianity. 
 
 June  24.  Preached  to  the  Indians  at  their  defirc,  and  upon 
 their  own  motion.  To  fee  poor  Pagans  defuous  of  heaiing 
 the  gofpel  of  Chrift,  animated  me  to  difcourfe  to  them,  al- 
 though I  was  now  very  weakly,  and  my  fpirits  much  exhaufl- 
 ed.  They  attended  with  the  gi  cateft  fcrioufnef;  and  diligence ; 
 and  there  was  fome  concern  for  their  fouls  falvation  apparent 
 among  them. 
 
 June  27.  Vifited  and  preached  to  the  Indians  again.  Their 
 number  now  amounted  to  about/oy/y  perfons^  Their  folem- 
 nity  and  attention  ftill  continued;  and  a  confiderable  con- 
 cern for  their  fouls  became  very  apparent  among  fundry  of 
 them.. 
 
 June  28.  The  Indians  being  now  gathered  a  confiderable 
 number  of  them,  from  their  feveral  and  difrant  habit athjns, 
 requefted  me  to  preach  twice  a-day  to  them,  being  defirous 
 to  hear  as  much  as  they  polTibiy  could  while  I  was  with  them. 
 I  cheerfully  complied  with  their  motion,  and   could  not  but 
 
 admire 
 
AMONG     THE    INDIANS. 
 
 32(; 
 
 a(Jmire  at  the  goodnefs  of  God,  who,  I  was  perfuaded,  had 
 incli'ied  them  thus  to  inquire  after  the  way  of  falvation. 
 
 June  iy.  Preached  again  twice  to  the  Indians.  Saw  (as  I 
 thought)  the  hand  of  God  very  evidently,  and  in  a  manner 
 fomewhat  remarkable,  making  provifion  for  their  fubfiftencc 
 together,  in  order  to  their  being  inllru^led  in  divine  things. 
 For  this  day  and  the  day  before,  with  only  walking  a  little 
 way  from  the  place  ol^  our  daily  meeting,  they  killed  three 
 deer,  which  were  a  feafonable  fupply  for  their  wants,  and 
 without  which,  it  feems,  they  could  not  have  fubillted  toge- 
 ther in  order  to  attend  the  means  of  grace. 
 
 Lord's  day,  June  30.  Preached  twice  this  day  alfo.  Ob- 
 ferved  yet  more  concern  and  affeftion  among  the  poor  Hea- 
 thens than  ever ;  fo  that  they  even  conftrained  me  to  tarry 
 yet  longer  with  them ;  although  my  conftitution  was  exceed- 
 ingly worn  out,  and  my  health  much  impaired  by  my  late 
 fatigues  and  labours,  and  efpecially  by  my  late  journey  to 
 Sufquahannah  in  May  lalt,  ia  which  I  lodged  on  the  ground 
 for  feveral  weeks  together. 
 
 July  I.  Preached  again  twice  to  a  very  ferious  and  attentive 
 aflsmbly  of  Indians,  they  having  now  learned  to  attend  the 
 Worfhip  of  God  with  Chrijilan  decency  in  all  refpefts. 
 
 There  were  now  between /or/y  and  f.fty  perfons  of  them 
 prcfent,  old  and  young. 
 
 I  fpent  fome  c onfiderable  time  in  difcourfing  with  them  ia 
 a  more  piivate  way,  inquiring  of  them  what  they  remember- 
 ed of  the  great  truths  that  had  been  taught  them  from  day  to 
 day;  and  may  juftly  fay,  it  was  amazing  to  fee  how  they  had 
 received  and  retained  the  inftruftions  given  them,  and  what  a 
 meafure  of  knowledge  fome  df  them  had  acquired  in  a  few  days. 
 
 July  2.  Was  obliged  to  leave  thtfe  Indians  at  Crofweek- 
 fung,  thinking  it  my  duty,  as  foon  as  health  would  admit, 
 again  to  vifit  thofe  at  the  Forks  of  Delaware.  When  1  came 
 to  take  leave  of  them,  and  fpoke  fomething  particularly  to 
 each  of  them,  they  all  earnedly  inquired  when  1  would  come 
 again,  and  exprefTed  a  great  delire  of  being  further  inflrucled. 
 And  of  their  own  accord  agreed,  that  when  I  fhould  come 
 again,  they  would  all  meet  and  live  together  during  my  con- 
 tinuance wiih  them  ;  and  that  they  would  do  their  utmoft 
 endeavours  to  gather  all  the  other  Indians  in  thefc  parts  that 
 were  yet  further  remote.  And  when  I  parted,  one  told  me 
 with  many  tears,  "  She  wifhed  God  would  change  her  heart ;" 
 another,  that  "  (he  wanted  to  find  Chrift :"  and  an  old  man 
 that  had  been  one  of  tiieir  chiefs,  wept  bitterly  with  concern 
 for  his  foul.     I  then  promifed  them  to  return  ns  fpeedily   as 
 
 .  T  t  %  my 
 
33«        DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 my  health,  and  bufinefs  elfevvhere  would  admit,  and  felt  not 
 a  little  concerned  at  parting,  left  the  good  impreffions  then 
 apparent  upon  numbers  of  them,  might  decline  and  wear  off", 
 when  the  means  came  to  ceafe  ;  and  yet  could  not  but  hope 
 that  he  who,  I  trufled,  had  begun  a  good  work  among  them, 
 and  who  I  knew  did  not  (land  in  need  of  means  to  carry  it  on, 
 would  maintain  and  promote  it  in  the  abfence  of  them,  al- 
 though at  the  fame  time  I  muft  confefs,  that  I  had  fo  often 
 feen  fuch  encouraging  appearances  among  the  Indians  other- 
 where prove  wholly  abortive ;  and  it  appeared  the  favour 
 would  be  fo  great,  if  God  ihould  now,  after  I  had  pafled 
 through  fo  confiderable  a  feries  of  almoft  fruitlefs  labours  and 
 fatigues,  and  after  my  rlfmg  hopes  had  been  fo  often  fruftra- 
 ted  among  thefe  poor  Pagans,  give  me  any  fpecial  fuccefs  in 
 my  labours  with  them,  that  1  could  not  believe,  and  fcarce 
 dared  to  hope  that  the  event  would  be  fo  happy,  and  fcarce 
 ever  fnund  myfelf  more  fufpended  between  hope  and  fear,  in 
 any  affair,  or  at  any  time  than  this. 
 
 This  encouraging  difpofition  and  readinefs  to  receive  in- 
 ftru(riion,  now  apparent  among  thefe  Indians,  feems  to  have 
 been  the  happy  cifedl  of  the  convifticn  that  one  or  two  of 
 them  met  with  fome  timefmce  at  the  Forks  of  Delaware,  who 
 have  fince  endeavoured  to  fhew  their  friends  the  evil  of  i- 
 dolatry,  dr.  And  although  the  other  Indians  feemed  but 
 little  to  regard,  but  rather  to  deride  them,  yet  this,  perhaps, 
 has  put  them  into  a  thinking  pofture  of  mind,  or  at  Icaft, 
 given  them  fome  thoughts  about  Chriftianity,  and  excited 
 in  f^me  of  them  a  curiojity  to  hear,  and  fo  made  way  for  the 
 prefent  encouraging  attention.  An  apprehenfion  that  this 
 might  be  the  ca.(e  here,  has  given  me  encouragement  that 
 God  may  in  fuch  a  manner  blefs  the  means  I  have  ufed  with 
 Indians  in  other  places,  where  there  is  as  y.t  no  appearance 
 of  it.  Iffo,  may  his  name  have  the  glory  of  it ;  for  I  have 
 learned  by  experience  that  he  only  can  open  the  ear,  engage 
 the  attention,  and  incline  the  heart  of  poor  benighted  pre- 
 judiced Pagans  to  receive  inftruftion. 
 
 Forks  of  Delaware,  in  Penfylvania,  1745. 
 
 Lord's  day,  July  14.  Difcourfed  to  the  Indians  twice,  feve- 
 ral  of  whom  appeared  concerned,  and  were,  I  have  reafon  to 
 think,  in  fome  mcaiure  con\inced  by  the  divine  Spirit  of  their 
 fm  and  mifeiy  ;  fo  that  ihey  wept  much  the  whole  time  of 
 divine  fcrvice. 
 
 Afterwards 
 
AMONG     THE    INDIANS.  331 
 
 Afterwards  difcourfcd  to  a  number  of  white  people  then 
 pre  fen  t. 
 
 July  18.  Preached  to  my  people,  who  attended  diligently, 
 beyond  what  had  been  common  among  thefe  Indians :  and 
 fome  of  them  appeared  concerned  for  their  fouls. 
 
 Lord's  day,  July  21.  Preached  to  the  Indians  firft,  then  to 
 a  number  of  white  people  prefent,  and  in  the  afternoon  to 
 the  Indians  again. — Divine  truths  feemed  to  make  very  con- 
 iiderable  imprelTions  upon  feveral  of  them,  and  caufed  the 
 tears  to  flow  freely. 
 
 Afterwards  I  baptized  my  interpreter  and  his  wife,  who 
 were  the  firft  I  baptized  among  the  Indians. 
 
 They  are  both  perfons  of  fome  experimental  knowledge  in 
 religion  ;  have  both  been  awakened  to  a  folemn  concern  for 
 their  fouls ;  have  to  appearance  been  brought  to  a  fenfe  of 
 their  mifery  and  undonenefsm  themfelves;  have  both  appeared 
 to  be  comforted  with  divine  confolations  ;  and  it  is  apparent 
 both  have  paffed  a  great,  and  I  cannot  but  hope  a  Javing 
 change. 
 
 It  may  perhaps  be  fatisfaflory  and  agreeable  that  I  fliould 
 give  fome  brief  relation  oi  the  man's  exercife  and  experience 
 lince  he  has  been  with  me,  efpecially  feeing  he  is  improved 
 as  my  interpreter  to  others. 
 
 "When  I  firfl;  employed  him  in  this  bufinefs  in  the  begin- 
 ning of  fummer  1744,  he  was  well  fitted  for  his  work  in  re- 
 gard of  his  acquaintance  with  the  Indian  and  Englifh  language, 
 as  well  as  v/ith  the  manners  of  both  nations ;  and  in  regard 
 of  his  defire  that  the  Indians  fliould  conform  to  the  cuftoms 
 and  manners  of  the  Engli/h,  and  efpecially  to  their  manner  of 
 living.  But  he  feemed  to  have  little  or  no  impreflion  of  reli- 
 gion upon  his  mind,  and  in  that  refpecl  was  very  unft  for 
 his  work,  being  uncapablc  of  underftanding  and  communica- 
 ting to  others  many  things  of  importance  ;  To  that  I  laboured 
 under  great  difadvantages  in  addrefling  the  Indians,  for  want 
 of  his  having  an  experimental,  as  well  as  more  dodrinal  ac- 
 quaintance with  divine  truths ;  and,  at  times,  ray  fpirits  fank, 
 and  were  much  difcouraged  under  this  difficulty,  efpecially 
 when  I  obferved  that  divine  truths  made  little  or  no  impref- 
 fions  upon  his  mind  for  many  weeks  together. 
 
 He  indeed  behaved  foberly  after  I  employed  '■.'m,  (although 
 before  he  had  been  a  hard  drinker),  and  feemed  honcftly  en- 
 gaged as  far  as  he  was  capable  in  the  performance  of  his 
 work ;  and  efpecially  he  appeared  very  delirous  that  the  In- 
 dians fhould  renounce  their  Heathenifti  rotions  and  practices, 
 and  conform  to  the    cufiroms   of  the  Chriflian  world.     But 
 
 T  t  2  ftill 
 
532       DIVINE    GRACE    DISPLAYED 
 
 ftill  feemed  to  have  no  concern  about  his  own  foul,  till  he  had 
 been  with  me  a  confiderable  time. 
 
 Near  the  latter  end  of  July  1744.  I  preached  to  an  affem- 
 bly  of  white  people,  with  more  free^iom  and  fervency  than  I 
 c  )uld  p  ^ffibly  addrefs  the  Indians  with,  without  their  having 
 firft  attained  a  greater  meafurc  of  doftrinal  knowledge :  at 
 which  time  he  was  prefent,  and  was  fomewhat  awakened  to  a 
 concern  for  his  foul;  fo  that  the  next  day  he  difcourfed  free- 
 ly with  me  about  his  fpiritual  concerns,  and  gave  me  an 
 opportunity  to  ufe  further  endeavours  to  fafh  n  the  irr.prel^ 
 fions  of  his  perifhing  ftate  upon  his  mind:  and  I  could  plainly 
 perceive  for  fome  time  after  this,  that  he  addrelFed  the  In- 
 dians with  more  concern  and  fervency  than  he  had  formerly 
 done. 
 
 But  thefe  imprellions  feemed  quickly  to  decline,  and  he  re- 
 mained in  a  great  meafure  carelefs  and  fecure,  until  fome 
 lime  late  in  the  fall  of  the  year  following,  at  which  time  he 
 fell  into  a  weak  and  languilhing  ftate  of  body,  and  continued 
 much  difordered  for  feveral  weeks  together.  And  at  thib  ita- 
 fon  divine  truth  took  hold  of  him,  and  made  deep  inipreifions 
 upon  his  mind.  He  was  brought  Under  great  concern  for  his 
 foul,  and  his  exercife  was  not  now  tranjitnt  and  unfteady, 
 but  crjnjlant  and  abiding,  fo  that  his  mma  was  burdened 
 from  day  to  day;  and  it  was  now  his  great  inquiiy,  "What 
 "  he  fhould  do  to  be  faved?"  His  fpiritual  trouble  prevailed, 
 dll  at  length  his  lleep,  in  a  meafure,  departed  from  him,  and 
 he  had  little  reft  day  or  night ;  but  walked  about  undtr  a  great 
 prefiure  of  mind,  (for  though  he  was  difordered  he  was  ftill 
 able  to  walk),  and  appeared  like  another  man  to  his  neighbours, 
 who  could  not  but  obfervc  his  behaviour  with  wonder. 
 
 After  he  had  been  fometime  under  this  exercife,  while  he 
 was  ftriving  for  mercy,  he  fays,  there  feemed  to  be  an  impajp' 
 fi.ble  mountain  before  him.  He  was  preffing  towards  heaven, 
 as  he  thought,  but  "  his  way  was  hedged  up  with  thorns,  that 
 **  he  could  not  ftu-  an  inch  further."  He  looked  this  way 
 and  that  way,  but  could  find  no  way  at  all.  He  thought  if 
 he  could  but  make  his  way  through  thefe  thorns  and  briers, 
 and  climb  up  the  firft  fie ep  pitch  of  the  mountain,  that  then 
 there  mi^^ht  be  hope  for  him  ;  but  no  way  or  means  could  he 
 find  to  iccop-.plifh  this.  Here  he  laboured  for  a  time,  but  all 
 in  vain;  he  law  it  was  irnpofphle,  he  fays,  for  him  ever  to 
 help  hirnfelf  through  this  infupportable  difficulty.  He  felt  it 
 fignifii^d  nothing,  "  it  fignified  juft  nothing  at  all  for  him  to 
 '^'  ftrive  and  ftruggle  any  more."  And  here,  he  fays,  he  gave 
 over  ijriving,  and  felt  that  it  was  a  gone  cafe  with  him,  as  to 
 
 |ii$ 
 
AMONCf     THE    INDIANS.  j3f 
 
 |ii$  oivn  power,  and  that  all  his  atterr  pts  were,  and  for  ever 
 would  be  vain  and  fruitlefs.  And  yet  was  more  calm  and 
 compofed  under  thi>  view  of  things,  than  he  had  been  while 
 ftriving  to  help  himleU. 
 
 While  lie  was  giving  me  this  account  of  his  exercife,  1 
 was  not  with  ut  tears  that  what  he  related  was  but  the  work- 
 ing of  his  own  imagination,  and  n<t  the  erteft  o\  any  divine 
 iUuminathn  of  mind.  But  before  I  had  tmie  to  dilcover  my 
 fears,  he  added,  that  at  this  time  he  felt  himlelf  in  a  miler- 
 ablc  and  perifliing  c.  ndition ;  that  he  faw  piamly  what  he 
 had  been  doing  all  his  days,  and  that  he  had  nevei  done  one 
 gjod  thing,  (as  he  expielied  it).  He  knew,  he  laid,  he  was 
 not  guilty  of  fome  wicked  aftions  that  he  knew  fonie  others 
 guilty  of.  He  had  not  been  ufed  to  Heal,  qoariel,  and  mur- 
 der; the  latter  of  which  vices  aie  common  among  the  In- 
 dians. He  likewife  knew  that  he  had  done  many  things  that 
 were  right-;  he  had  been  kind  to  his  neighbouis,  6c.  But 
 ftiU  his  cry  was,  "  that  he  had  never  done  one  good  thing." 
 I  knew,  faid  he,  that  I  had  not  been  fo  bad  as  fome  others  in 
 fome  things,  and  that  I  had  done  many  things  which  folks 
 call  good  ;  but  all  this  did  me  no  good  now,  I  faw  that 
 "  all  was  bad,  and  that  I  never  had  done  one  good  tling," 
 (meaning  that  he  had  never  done  any  thing  from  a  right  pi  n- 
 ciple,  and  with  a  right  vieiv,  though  he  had  done  many  thrngs 
 that  were  niateriaUy  good  and  right).  And  now  I  thought, 
 faid  he,  that  I  mull  link  down  to  hell,  that  there  was  no 
 hope  for  me,  "  becaufe  I  never  tould  do  any  thing  that  was 
 "  good  ;"  and  if  God  let  me  alone  never  fo  long,  and  I 
 Ihould  try  never  fo  much,  ftill  1  ihould  do  nothing  but  what 
 is  bad,  6c. 
 
 This  further  account  of  his  exercife,  fatisfied  me  that  it 
 Was  not  the  mere  working  of  his  imagination,  fmce  he  ap- 
 peared fo  evidently  to  die  to  himfelf,  and  to  be  divorced  from  a 
 dependence  upon  his  own  righteoufnefs,  and  good  deeds, 
 which  mankind  in  a/^//c«  ftate,  are  fo  much  attached  to,  and 
 inclined  to  hope  for  lalvation  upon. 
 
 There  was  one  thing  more  in  his  view  of  things  at  this 
 time  that  was  very  remarkable.  He  not  only  faw,  he  lays, 
 what  a  miferable  ftate  he  himfelf  was  in,  but  he  likewife  law 
 the  world  around  him,  in  general,  were  in  the  fame  perifhing 
 circumftances,  notwithftanding  the  profeffion  many  of  them 
 made  of  Chriftianity,  and  the  hope  they  entertained  of  ob- 
 taining everlafting  happincfs.  And  this  he  faw  clearly,  "  as 
 **  if  he  was  now  awaked  out  of  ileep,  or  had  a  cloud  taken 
 
 "  from 
 
33/j       DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 *'  from  before  his  eyes."  He  faw  that  the  life  he  had  lived 
 was  the  way  to  eternal  death,  that  he  was  now  on  the  brink 
 of  endlefs  naifery  :  and  when  he  looked  round,  he  faw  multi- 
 tudes of  others  who  had  lived  the  fame  life  with  himfelf, 
 
 had  no  more  goodnefs  than  he,  and  yet  dreamed  that  they 
 were  fafe  enough,  as  he  had  formerly  done.  He  was  fully 
 perfuaded  by  their  converfation  and  behaviour,  that  they  had 
 never  felt  their  fm  and  mifery,  as  he  now  felt  his. 
 
 After  he  had  been  for  fome  time  in  this  condition,  fenfible 
 of  the  impoflibility  of  his  helping  himfelf  by  any  thing  he 
 could  do,  or  of  being  dehvered  by  any  created  arm,  fo  that 
 he  "  had  given  up  all  for  loft,"  as  to  his  own  attempts,  and 
 was  become  more  calm  and  compofed;  then,  he  fays,  it  was 
 borne  in  upon  his  mind  as  if  it  had  been  audibly  fpoken  to 
 him,  "  There  is  hope,  there  is  hope."  Whereupon  his  foul 
 feemed  to  reft  and  be  in  fome  meafure  fatibfied,  though  he 
 had  no  confiderable  joy. 
 
 He  cannot  here  remember  diftinclly  any  views  he  had  of 
 Chrift,  or  give  any  clear  account  of  his  foul's  acceptance  of 
 him,  which  makes  his  experience  appear  the  more  doubtful, 
 and  renders  it  lefs  fatisfaclory  to  himfelf  and  others,  than 
 (perhaps)  it  might  be,  if  he  could  remember  diftindlly  the  ap- 
 prehenfions  and  actings  of  his  mind  at  this  feafon. 
 
 But  thefe  exercifes  of  foul  were  attended  and  followed  with 
 a  very  great  change  in  the  man,  fo  that  it  might  juftly  be 
 faid,  he  was  become  another  man,  if  not  a  iteiv  man.  His 
 converfation  and  deportment  were  much  altered,  and  even  the 
 carelefs  world  could  not  but  admire  what  had  befallen  him  to 
 make  fo  great  a  change  in  his  temper,  difcourfe,  and  beha- 
 viour.  
 
 And  efpecially  there  was  a  furprifmg  alteration  in  his  pu- 
 blic performances.  He  now  addrefted  the  Indians  with  ad- 
 mirable kivency,  and  fcarce  knew  when  to  leave  off:  and 
 fometimeb  when  1  had  concluded  my  difcourfe,  and  was  re- 
 turning homeward,  he  would  tarry  behind  to  repeat  and  in- 
 culcate what  had  been  fpoken. 
 
 His  change  is  abiding,  and  his  life,  fo  far  as  I  know,  un- 
 hlemiJJ.ed  to  this  day,  though  it  is  now  more  than  fix  months 
 lince  he  experienced  this  change ;  in  which  fpace  of  time  he 
 has  been  as  much  expofed  to  Jlrong  drink,  as  pofTible,  in  di- 
 vers places  where  it  has  been  moving  fi  ee  as  water  ;  and  yet 
 has  never,  as  I  know  ot,  dilcovered  any  hankering  defire  atter 
 it. 
 
 He  feems  to  have  a  very  confiderable  experience  of  fpiri- 
 tual'exerciie,  and  difcourfes  feelingly  of  the  ccnflifts  and  con- 
 
 folations 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  335 
 
 folations  of  a  real  Chriftian.  His  heart  echoes  to  the  fouU 
 humblwg  doftrines  of  grace,  and  he  never  appears  better 
 pleafed  than  when  he  hears  of  the  abfolute  fovereignty  of  God^ 
 and  the  falvation  of  finners  in  away  oi  mere  free  grace.  He 
 has  likewife  of  late  had  more  fatisfadVion  refpefting  his  own 
 flate,  has  been  much  enlivened  and  affifted  in  his  work,  fo 
 that  he  hab  been  a  great  comfort  to  me. 
 
 And  upon  a  view  and  flrift  obfervation  of  his  ferious  and 
 favoury  converfation,  his  Chriftian  temper,  and  unblemiflied 
 behaviour  for  fo  c  mfiderable  a  track  of  time,  as  well  as  his 
 experience  I  have  given  an  account  of,  I  think  that  I  have 
 reafon  to  hope  that  he  is  "  created  anew  in  Chrift  Jefus  to 
 *'  good  works." 
 
 His  name  is  Mofes  Tinda  Tautaray  ;  he  is  about  fifty  years 
 of  age,  and  is  pretty  well  acquainted  with  the  Pagan  notions 
 and  cuftoms  of  his  countrymen,  and  fo  is  the  better  able  now 
 to  expofe  them.  He  has,  I  am  perfuaded,  already  been,  and 
 I  truft  will  yet  be  a  bleffing  to  the  other  Indians. 
 
 July  23.  Preached  to  the  Indians,  but  had  few  hearers: 
 thofe  who  are  conftantly  at  home  feem  of  late  to  be  under 
 fome  ferious  imprelTions  of  a  religious  nature. 
 
 July  26.  Preached  to  my  people,  and  afterwards  baptized 
 my  interpreter'' s  children. 
 
 Lord's  day,  July  28.  Preached  again,  and  perceived  my 
 people,  at  leaft  fome  of  them,  more  thoughtful  than  ever  a- 
 bout  their  fouls  concerns.  I  was  told  by  fome,  that  feeing 
 my  interpreter  and  others  baptized  made  them  more  concern- 
 ed than  any  thing  they  had  ever  feen  or  heard  before.  There 
 was  indeed  a  confiderable  appearance  of  divine  power  amongft 
 them  at  the  time  that  ordinance  was  adminiftered.  May  that 
 divine  influence  fpread  and  increafe  more  abundantly ! 
 
 July  30.  Difcourfed  to  a  number  of  my  people,  and  gave 
 them  fome  particular  advice  and  direflion,  being  now  about 
 to  leave  them  for  the  prefent,  in  order  to  renew  my  vifit  to 
 the  Indians  in  New-Jerfey.  They  were  very  attentive  to  my 
 difcourfe,  and  earneftly  defirous  to  know  when  I  defigned  to 
 return  to  them  again. 
 
 d 
 
 Crofweekfung  in  New-Jerfey,  1 745. 
 
 Auguft  3.  Having  vifited  the  Indians  in  thefe  parts  in  June 
 laft,  and  tarried  with  them  fome  confiderable  time,  preaching 
 almoft:  daily ;  at  which  feafon  God  was  pleafed  to  pour  upon 
 them  a  fpirit  ef  awakening  and  concern  for  their   fouls,  and 
 
 furprifingly 
 
p6       DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 furprifinjjly  to  engage  their  attention  to  divine  truths.  I  now 
 found  them  ferious,  and  a  number  of  them  under  deep  concern 
 foi  an  intereft  in  Chrift :  their  convifl:ions  of  their  fmful  and 
 perihing  date  having,  in  my  ab  fence  from  them,  been  much 
 foinoted  by  the  labours  and  endeavours  of  the  Reverend  Mr 
 William  Penncnt,  to  whom  I  had  advifed  them  to  apply  for 
 diieflion,  and  whofe  houfe  they  frequented  much  while  1  was 
 gone. — —I  preached  to  them  this  day  with  fome  view  to 
 Rev.  xxii.  17.  "  And  whofoever  will,  let  him  take  the  water 
 "  of  life  freely :''  though  I  could  not  pretend  to  handle  the 
 fubjeft  methodically  among  them. 
 
 I  he  Lord,  I  am  perfuaded,  enabled  me,  in  a  manner  fomc- 
 "what  lincommon,  to  fet  before  them  the  Lord  Jefus  Chrift  as  a 
 kind  and  compafli  mate  Saviour,  inviting  diftrefTed  and  perifh- 
 ing  fmners  to  ace- pt  everlafting  mercy.  And  a  furprifing 
 concern  foon  became  apparent  among  them.  There  were  a- 
 bout  twenty  adult  perfons  together,  (many  of  the  Indians  at 
 remote  places  not  having  as  yet  had  time  to  come  fince  my 
 return  hither),  and  not  above  two  that  I  could  fee  with  dry 
 eyes.  Some  were  much  concerned,  and  difcnvered  vehement 
 longings  of  foul  after  Chrifl,  to  fave  them  from  the  mifery  they 
 felt  and  feared. 
 
 Lord's  dzy,  Augufl  4.  Being  invited  by  a  neighbouring 
 miniftcr  to  aififl  in  the  adminiftration  of  the  Lord's  iupper,  I 
 complied  with  his  requeft,  and  tooic  the  Indians  along  with 
 me  ;  not  only  tliofe  that  were  together  the  day  beforCj  but 
 many  more  that  were  coming  to  hear  me  ;  fo  that  there  were 
 Bear  fifty  in  al,  old  and  young. 
 
 They  attended  the  feveral  difcourfes  of  the  day,  and  fome 
 6f  them  that  cnild  undei  lland  Englifh,  were  much  alfe^led, 
 and  all  feemed  to  haye  their  concern  in  fome  meafure  raifed. 
 
 Now  a  change  in  their  manners  began  to  appear  very  vi- 
 fible.  in  tfie  evrntng  when  they  came  to  fup  together,  they 
 would  not  tafte  a  morfcl  till  they  bad  fent  to  me  to  come  and 
 aflc  a  bleifing  on  their  food ;  at  which  time  fundiy  of  thera 
 wept,  efpecialiy  when  I  minced  them  how  they  had  in  times 
 pafl:  eat  their  feafts  in  honour  to  devils,  and  negle61ed  to  thank 
 God  for  them. 
 
 Augufl:  5.  After  a  ^ermon  had  been  preached  by  another 
 miniftcr,  I  preached,  and  c  ncluded  the  public  work  of  the 
 folemnity  from  Jolm  vii  37.;  and  in  my  difcourfe  addrefied 
 the  Indians  in  particular,  who  fat  by  thcmfelves  in  a  part  of 
 the  houfe;  at  whic'  time  one  or  two  of  them  were  llruck 
 ■with  deep  concern,  as  they  afterwards  told  me,  who  had  been 
 little  affeded  before  :  others  had  their  concern  increafed  to  a 
 
 confiderable 
 
Among   the  Indians.        337 
 
 ^nfiderable  degree.  In  the  evening  (the  greater  part  of  them 
 being  at  the  houfe  where  1  lodged)  I  diTcaurfed  to  them,  and 
 /ounJ  them  univerfally  engaged  about  their  foul's  concern, 
 inquiring,  "  What  they  ih  mid  do  to  be  laved?"  And  all  their 
 cjiiverfation  among  themfelves  turned  upon  religions  matters, 
 in  which  they  were  much  aliilled  by  my  interpreter,  who  was 
 with  them  day  and  night. 
 
 This  day  there  was  one  woman,  that  had  been  much  con- 
 cerned for  her  foul,  ever  fince  Ihe  iirll:  heard  me  preach  in 
 Jane  laft,  who  obtained  comfort,  1  truft,  folid  and  well 
 grounded  :  ftie  feemcd  to  be  filled  with  love  to  Chrift,  at  the 
 fame  tine  behaved  humbly  and  tenderly,  and  appeared  afraid 
 pi"  nothing  fo  much  as  of  grieving  and  oiicading  him  whom 
 her  foul  loved. 
 
 Auguft  6.  la  the  morning  I  difcourfed  to  the  Indians  at  the 
 houfe  where  we  lodged:  many  of  them  were  then  much 
 alFefled,  and  appeared  furprifingly  tender,  fo  that  a  few 
 ^vords  about  their  fouls  concerns  would  caufe  the  tears  to 
 ilow  freely,  and  produce  many  fobs  and  groans. 
 
 In  the  atternooii,  they  being  returned  lo  the  place  where 
 I  have  ufualiy  preached  amonift  them,  I  again  difcourfed 
 to  them  there.  There  were  about  fifty- fi:e  perfons  in  all, 
 ab  )ut  forty  rhat  were  capable  of  attending  divine  fervice  with 
 tinderftanding:  I  inliftcd  upon  i  John  iv.  lo.  "Herein  is 
 *'  love,"  (6<r.  They  feemed  eager  of  hearing  ;  but  there 
 appeared  nothing  very  remarkable,  except  their  attention,  till 
 Hear  the  clofe  of  my  difcourfe;  and  then  divine  truths  were 
 attended  with  a  furprifmg  influence,  and  produced  a  great 
 concern  among  them.  There  was  fcarce  three  in  f^rty  that 
 could  refrain  from  tears  and  bitter  cries.  They  all,  as  one, 
 feemed  in  an  ag.ny  oi  foul  to  obtain  an  Intereft  in  Chrift ; 
 and  the  more  I  difcourfed  of  the  love  and  compaiTion  of  God 
 in  fending  his  Son  to  fuffcr  for  the  fins  of  men ;  and  the  more 
 I  invited  them  to  come  and  partake  of  his  love,  the  more  their 
 diftrefs  was  aggravated,  becaufe  they  felt  themfeh^es  unable 
 to  come. 
 
 It  was  furprifing  to  fee  how  their  hearts  feemed  to  be 
 pierced  with  the  tender  and  melting  invitations  of  the  go- 
 fpel,  when  there  was  not  a  word  of  terror  fpoken  to  theni. 
 
 There  were  this  day  two  perfons  that  obtained  relief  and 
 comfort,  which  (when  I  came  to  difcourfe  with  them  par- 
 ticularly) appeared  folid,  rational,  and  fcriptural.  After  I 
 had  inquired  into  the  grounds  of  their  comfort,  and  faid  many 
 things  I  thought  proper  to  them,  I   f,ikcd  them   what  they 
 
 U  u  wanted 
 
338      DIVINE     GRACE    DISPLAYED 
 
 ■wanted  God  to  do  further  for  them?  They  replied,  "  They 
 **  wanted  Chrift  fliould  wipe  their  hearts  quite  clean,"  isc. 
 
 Surprifing  were  no 'a^  iht  do? nrrs  of  the  Lord,  that  I  can  fay 
 no  lefs  of  this  day  (and  I  need  fay  no  more  of  it)  than  that 
 the  arm  of  the  Lord  was  powerfully  and  marvelloufly  revealed 
 in  it. 
 
 Auguft  7.  Preached  to  the  Iiadians  from  If.  llii.  3. 10. 
 
 There  was  a  rema'kable  influence  attending  the  word,  and 
 great  concern  in  the  afTembly  ;  but  fcarce  equal  to  what  ap- 
 peared the  day  before,  that  is,  not  quite  ^o  univerfal.  How- 
 ever, moft  were  much  affefted,  and  many  in  great  diftrefs 
 for  their  fouls;  and  fome  few  could  neither  go  n  jf  ftand,  but 
 lay  flat  on  the  ground,  as  if  pierced  at  heart,  crying  inceflant- 
 ly  for  mercy  :  feveral  were  newly  awakened,  and  it  was  re- 
 markable, that  as  fafl:  as  they  came  from  remote  places  round 
 about,  the  Spirit  of  God  feemed  to  feize  them  with  concern 
 for  their  fouls. 
 
 After  public  fervice  was  concluded,  I  found  two  perfons 
 more  that  had  newly  met  with  comfort,  of  whom  I  had  good 
 hopes ;  and  a  third  that  I  could  not  but  entertain  fome  hopes 
 of,  whofe  cafe  did  not  appear  fo  clear  as  the  other ;  fo  that 
 here  were  now  fix  in  all  that  had  got  fome  relief  from  their 
 fpiritual  dijflrefl~es,  and  five  whofe  experience  appeared,  very 
 clear  and  fatisfaftory.  And  it  is  worthy  of  remark,  that 
 thofe  who  obtained  comfort  firft,  were  in  general  deeply  af- 
 fefled  with  concern  for  their  fouls,  when  I  preached  to  them 
 in  June  lafl:. 
 
 Auguft  8.  In  the  afternoon  I  preached  to  the  Indians,  their 
 number  was  now  about  fixty-five  perfons,  men,  wom.en,  and 
 children:  I  difcourfed  from  Luke  xiv.  16. — 23.  and  was  fa- 
 voured with  uncommon  freedom  in  my  difcourfe. 
 
 There  was  much  vifible  concern  among  them  while  I  was 
 difcourfmg  publicly  ;  but  afterwards  when  1  fpoke  to  one  and 
 another  more  particularly,  whom  I  perceived  under  much 
 concern,  the  power  of  God  feemed  to  defcend  upon  the  af- 
 fembly  "  like  a  ruihing  mighty  wind,"  and  with  an  aftonifn- 
 ing  energy  bore  down  all  before  it. 
 
 I  Itood  amazed  at  the  influence  that  feized  the  audience  air 
 mofl:  univerfally,  and  could  compare  it  to  nothing  more  aptly, 
 than  the  irrefiftible  force  of  a  mighty  torrent,  or  fwclling  de- 
 luge, that  with  its  infupportable  weight  and  pre flure,  bears 
 down  and  fweeps  before  it  whatever  is  in  its  way.  Almoft 
 all  perfons  of  all  ages  were  bowed  down  with  concern  to- 
 gether, and  fcarce  one  was  able  to  withftand  t\\t  JJjock  of  this 
 furprifing  operation.     Old  men  and  women,  who  had  been 
 
 drunken 
 
AMONG     THE    INDIANS.  339 
 
 fiSrunken  wretches  for  many  years,  and  fomc  little  children, 
 not  more  than  llx  or  feven  years  of  age,  appeared  in  diflrefs 
 for  their  fouls,  as  well  as  perfons  of  middle  age.  And  it  was 
 apparent  thefc  children  (fome  of  them  at  leaft)  were  not  7nere- 
 Ijf  frighted  with  feeing  the  general  concern  ;  but  were  made 
 fenfible  of  their  danger,  the  badnefs  of  their  hearts,  and  their 
 mifery  without  Chrift,  as  fome  of  them  expreffed  it.  The 
 moft  ftubborn  hearts  were  now  obliged  to  bow.  A  principal 
 man  among  the  Indians,  who  before  was  moll  fecure  and  felf- 
 righteous,  and  thought  his  (late  good  becaufe  he  knew  more 
 than  the  generality  of  the  Indians  had  formerly  done,  and 
 ■who  with  a  great  degree  of  confiience  the  day  before,  told 
 me,  "  he  had  been  a  Chriftian  more  than  ten  years,"  was 
 now  brought  under  folemn  concern  for  his  foul,  and  wept 
 bitterly.  Another  man  confiderable  in  years,  who  had  been 
 a  murderer,  a  powwovj,  (or  conjurer),  and  a  notorious  drunk- 
 ard, was  likewife  brought  now  to  cry  for  mercy  with  many 
 tears,  and  to  complain  much  that  he  could  be  no  more  con- 
 cerned when  he  faw  his  danger  fo  very  great. 
 
 They  were  almoft  univerfally  praying  and  crying  for  mer- 
 cy in  every  part  of  the  houfe,  and  many  out  of  doors,  and 
 numbers  could  neither  go  nor  ftand:  their  concern  was  fo 
 great,  each  one  for  himielf,  that  none  feeraed  to  take  any 
 notice  of  thofe  about  them,  but  each  prayed  as  freely  for 
 themfelves  ;  and  (1  am  apt  to  think)  were,  to  their  own  ap- 
 prehenfion,  as  much  retired  as  if  they  had  been  every  one  by 
 themfelves  in  the  thickeft  defart ;  or,  I  believe  rather,  that 
 they  thought  nothing  about  any  but  themfelves,  and  their 
 own  ftates,  and  fo  were  every  one  praying  apart,  although 
 all  together. 
 
 It  feemed  to  me  there  was  now  an  exaft  fulfilment  of  that 
 prophecy,  Zech.  xii.  10.  11.  12.;  for  there  was  now  "  a  great 
 
 "  mourning,  like  the  mourning  of  Hadadrimmon;" and 
 
 each  feemed  to  "  mourn  apart."  Methought  this  had  a  near 
 rcfemblance  to  the  day  of  God's  power,  mentioned  Jo(h.  x. 
 14. ;  for  I  muft  fay,  I  never  fee  any  day  like  it  in  all  re- 
 fpedls:  it  was  a  day  wherein  I  am  perluaded  the  Lord  did 
 much  to  deftroy  the  kingdom  of  darknefs  among  this  people. 
 
 This  concern  in  general  was  moll  ratlv)nal  and  juft-,  thofe 
 who  had  been  awakened  any  confiderable  time,  complained 
 more  efpecially  of  the  badnefs  of  their  hearts ;  and  thofe  new- 
 ly awakened,  of  the  badnefs  of  their  lives  and  anions  part; 
 and  all  were  afraid  of  the  anger  of  God,  and  of  everlafling 
 mifery  as  the  defert  of  their  fins. 
 
 Some  of  the  -white  people,  who  came  out  of  curiofity  to 
 
 U  u  2  "  hear 
 
340     DIVINE    GRACE    DISPLAYED 
 
 "  hear  what  this  babbler  would  fay"  to  the  poor  ignorant 
 Indians,  were  much  awakened,  and  fome  appeared  to  be 
 wounded  with  a  view  of  their  perirtiing  flate. 
 
 Thofe  who  had  lately  obtained  relief,  were  filled  with  com- 
 fort at  this  feafon  ;  they  appeared  calm  and  compoled,  and 
 feemed  to  rejoice  in  Chrift  Jefus  ;  and  fome  ol  them  took 
 their  diftrefl'cd  hiends  by  the  hand,  telling  them  of  the  good- 
 nefs  of  Chrifl,  and  the  comfort  that  is  to  be  enjoyed  in  him, 
 and  thence  invited  them  to  come  and  give  up  iheir  hearts  ta 
 him.  And  I  could  oblerve  fome  of  them,  in  the  moft  honeft 
 and  unafFecfted  manner,  (without  any  dcfitn  of  being  taken 
 notice  of),  lifting  up  their  eyes  to  heaven,  as  if  crying  for 
 mercy,  M'hile  they  faw  the  diiftrefs  of  the  poor  fouls  around 
 them. 
 
 There  was  one  remarkable  inflance  of  awakening  this  day, 
 that  I  cannot  but  take  particular  notice  of  here.  A  young 
 Indian  woman,  who,  I  believe,  never  knev.  before  flie  had  a 
 TjuI,  nor  ever  thought  of  any  fuch  thing,  htarirg  that  there 
 was  fomething  (Irsnge  among  the  Indians,  came  (it  (een;s)  to 
 fi?e  what  was  the  matter  :  fhe  in  her  way  to  the  Indians,  call- 
 ed at  my  lodgingb.  v>nd  when  I  told  her  I  dehgned  prefent- 
 ly  to  prcbch  to  the  Indians,  laughed,  and  feemed  to  mock ; 
 but  went  hov.ever  to  tl.ein.  I  had  not  proceeded  far  in  ny 
 public  difcourfe,  before  fhe  felt  ef}'e£luaUy  that  fhe  had  a  foul ; 
 and  before  I  had  concluded  my  difcourfe,  was  fo  convinced 
 of  her  fin  and  mifeiy,  and  fo  diftreffed  with  concern  for  her 
 foul's  falvation,  that  fhe  feemed  iike  one  pierced  through  with 
 a  dart,  and  cried  out  incefiantly.  She  could  neither  go  nor 
 ftand,  nor  fit  on  her  feat  without  being  held  up.  After  pib- 
 lie  fefvice  was  over,  fhe  lay  flat  on  the  ground  praying  ear- 
 ntflly,  and  would  take  no  notice  of,  nor  give  any  anlwer  to 
 9ny  that  fpoke  to  her.  J  hearkened  to  hear  what  fhe  faid, 
 and  perceived  the  burden  of  her  prayer  to  be,  Cittummauha- 
 htntmch  rvechaumeh  knieLeh  Ndnh,  i.  e.  "  Have  mercy  on  me, 
 *'  and  help  me  to  give  you  my  heart."  And  thus  (he  ccnti- 
 r^ucd  praying  incefiartly  for  many  hours  together. 
 
 T1:)S  was  indeed  a  fui  prifing  day  of  God's  power,  and  feem- 
 ed enough  to  convince  an  Athcift  of  the  truth,  importance, 
 and  power  of  God's  word. 
 
 x^.u'giifl  9.  Spent  almcft  the  whole  day  with  the  Indians, 
 ti}e  former  part  of  it  in  difcourhng  to  many  of  them  private- 
 ly, and  efpecially  to  Ibmc  who  ijad  lately  received  comfort, 
 and  endeavouring  to  inquire  into  the  grounds  of  it,  as  well 
 as  to  give  them  fome  proper  inllruclions,  cautions,  and  direc- 
 tions. 
 
 Is 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  34'^ 
 
 In  the  afternoon  difcourfed  to  them  publicly.'  There  were 
 ftow  prefent  about  feventy  perfons,  old  and  young.  I  opened 
 and  applied  the  parable  of  the  fower,  Matth.  xiii.  Was  en- 
 abled to  difcourfe  with  much  plainnefs,  and  found  aftei  wards 
 that  this  difcouife  was  very  inftruttive  to  them.  There  were 
 many  tears  among  them  while  I  was  difcourfing  publiclji,  but 
 no  confiderable  ciy  .  yet  fome  were  much  alfe6>cd  with  a  few 
 ■Words  fpoken  from  Matth.  xi.  28.  with  which  I  concluded  my 
 dilcourle.  But  while  I  was  dilcourfmg  near  night  to  two  or 
 three  of  the  awakened  perfons,  a  divine  influence  feemed  to 
 attend  what  was  fpoken  to  them  in  a  powerful  manner,  which 
 caufed  the  perfons  to  cry  out  in  anguifh  of  foul,  although  I 
 fpoke  not  a  word  of  terror ;  but,  on  the  contrary,  fet  before 
 them  the  fulnefs  and  ail-fufficiency  of  Chrift's  merits,  and  his 
 'willingnefs  to  fave  all  that  cam.e  to  him;  and  thereupon 
 prefled  them  to  come  without  delay. 
 
 The  cry  of  thcfe  was  foon  heard  by  others,  who,  though 
 fcattered  before,  immediately  gathered  round.  I  then  pro- 
 ceeded in  the  fame  flrain  of  golpel-invitation,  till  they  were 
 all  melted  into  tears  and  cries,  except  two  or  three;  and 
 feemed  in  the  greateft  dillrefs  to  find  and  fecure  an  intereft  ia 
 
 the  great  Redeemer. Some  who  had  but  little  more  than  a 
 
 rufie  made  in,  their  pcij/icns  the  day  before,  feemed  now  to 
 be  deeply  afFecled  and  wounded  at  heart:  and  the  concern  in 
 general  appeared  near  as  prevalent  as  it  was  the  day  before. 
 There  was  indeed  a  very  great  mourn' ng  among  them,  and 
 yet  every  one  (tcmcd  to  mown  apa^t.  For  fo  great  was  their 
 concern,  that  almoft  evejy  one  was  prating  and  crying  for 
 himfelf,  as  if  none  had  been  near.  Guttummaukalummeh, 
 gt'.ttummaukalwmnch,  i.  e.  "  Have  mercy  upon  me,  have- 
 ■'  mercy  upon  me ;"  was   the  common  cry. 
 
 It  was  very  affefbing  to  fee  the  poor  Indians,  who  the 
 Other  day  were  hallooing  and  yelling  in  their  idolatrous  feaftg 
 and  drunken'  frolics,  now  crying  to  God  with  fuch  impor- 
 tunity for  an  intereft  in  his  dear  Son ! 
 
 Found  two  or  three  perfons,  who  I  had  rcafcn  to  hope  had 
 taken  comfort  upon  good  grounds  fince  the  evening  before: 
 and  thefe,  with  others  that  had  obtained  comfort,  were  to- 
 gether, and  feemed  to  rejoice  much  that  God  was  carrying 
 on  his  work  with  fuch  power  upon  others. 
 
 Auguft  10.  Rode  to  the  Indians,  and  began  to  difcourfe 
 more  privately  to  thofe  who  had  obtained  comfort  and  fatit 
 fa6lion ;  endeavouring  to  inftrucl,  direct,  caution,  and  com- 
 fort them.  But  others  being  eager  of  hearing  every  word 
 ifhat  related  to  fpiritual  concerns,  foon  came  together  one  af- 
 ter 
 
342      DIVINE    GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 ter  another:  and  when  I  had  difcourfed  to  the  young  converts 
 more  than  half  an  hour,  they  feemed  much  melted  with  di- 
 vine things,  and  earneftly  defirous  to  be  with  Chrift.  I  told 
 them  of  the  godly  foul's  perfed  purity,  and  full  enjoyment 
 of  Chrid,  immediately  upon  its  feparation  from  the  body  j 
 and  that  it  would  be  for  ever  inconceivably  more  happy,  than 
 ihey  had  ever  been  for  any  fhort  fpace  of  time,  when  Chrift 
 feemed  near  to  them,  in  prayer  or  other  duties.  And  that  I 
 Hiight  make  way  for  fpeaking  of  the  refurreftion  of  the  body, 
 and  thence  of  the  complete  bleflednefs  of  the  man,  1  faid, 
 But  perhaps  fome  of  you  will  fay,  I  love  my  body  as  well  as 
 my  foul,  and  I  cannot  bear  to  think  that  my  body  fhould  lie 
 dead,  if  my  foul  is  happy.  To  which  they  all  cheerfully  re- 
 plied, Muttoh,  muttoh,  (before  I  had  opportunity  to  profecute 
 what  I  defigned  refpecling  the  refurredUon),  No,  no.  They 
 did  not  regard  their  bodies,  if  their  fouls  might  be  but  with 
 Chrift.  Then  they  appeared  "willing  to  be  abfent  from  the 
 "  body,  that  they  might  be  prefent  with  the  Lord." 
 
 When  I  had  fpent  fome  time  with  thefe,  I  turned  to  the 
 other  Indians,  and  fpoke  to  them  from  Luke  xix.  lo.  I  had 
 not  difcourfed  long  before  their  concern  rofe  to  a  great  de- 
 gree, and  the  houfe  was  filled  with  cries  and  groans.  And 
 when  I  infifted  on  the  corapafTion  and  care  of  the  Lord  Jefus 
 Chrift  for  thofe  that  were  lo/^,  who  thought  themfeives  un- 
 done,  and  could  find  no  way  of  efcape,  this  melted  them  down 
 the  more,  and  aggravated  their  diftrefs;,  that  they  could  not 
 find,  and  come  to  fo  kind  a  Saviour. 
 
 Sundry  perfons  who  before  had  been  but  (lightly  awakened, 
 were  now  deeply  wounded  with  a  fenfe  of  their  fm  and  mifery. 
 And  one  man  in  particular,  who  was  never  before  awakened, 
 was  now  made  to  feel,  that  "the  word  of  the  Lord  was  quick 
 *'  and  powerful,  ftiarper  than  any  two-edged  fword."  He 
 feemed  to  be  pierced  at  heart  with  diftrefs,  and  his  concern 
 appeared  moft  rational  and  fcriptural :  for  he  faid,  "  all  the 
 "  wickednefs  of  his  paft  Ufe  was  brought  frefti  to  his  remem- 
 "  brance,  and  he  faw  all  the  vile  aftions  he  had  done  former- 
 "  ly,  as  if  done  but  ycfterday." 
 
 Found  one  that  had  newly  received  comfort,  after  preffing 
 diftrefs  from  day  to  day.  Could  not  but  rejoice  and  admire 
 at  divine  goodnefs  in  what  appeared  this  day.  There  feems 
 to  be  fome  good  done  by  every  difcourfe  ;  fome  newly  a- 
 wakened  every  day,  and  fome  comforted. 
 
 It  was  refreftiing  to  obferve  the  condu£l  of  thofe  that  had 
 obtained  comfort,  while  others  were  diftrefted  with  fear  and 
 concern  J  thofe  were  lifting  up  their  hearts  to  God  for  them. 
 
 Lord's 
 
AMONG    THE    INDIANS.  343 
 
 Lord's  day,  Auguft  11.  Dlfcourfed  in  the  forenoon  from 
 the  parable  of  the  prodigal  fort,  Luke  xv.  Obferved  no  fuch 
 remarkable  efFe<ft  of  the  word  upon  the  aflembly  as  in  days 
 
 part. There  were  numbers  of  carelefs  fpeftators  of  the 
 
 white  people ;  fome  Quakers,  and  others. 
 
 In  the  afternoon  I  difcourfed  upon  a  part  of  St  Peter's 
 fermon,  Afts  ii. ;  and  at  the  clofe  of  my  difcourfe  to  the  In- 
 dians, made  an  addrefs  to  the  -white  people,  and  divine  truths 
 fee  Tied  then  to  be  attended  with  power  both  to  Englifh  and 
 Indians.  Several  of  the  white  Heathen  were  awakened,  and 
 could  not  longer  be  idle  fpeftators,  but  found  they  had  fouls 
 to  fave  or  lofe  as  well  as  the  Indians,  and  a  great  concern 
 fpread  through  the  whole  aflembly,  fo  that  this  alfo  appeared 
 to  be  a  day  of  God's  power,  efpecially  towards  the  conclulion 
 ©fit,  as  well  as  feveral  of  the  former,  although  the  influence 
 attending  the  word  feemed  fcarce  fo  powerful  now  as  in  fome 
 days  paft. 
 
 The  number  of  the  Indians,  old  and  young,  was  now  up- 
 wards of  feventy,  and  one  or  two  were  newly  awakened 
 this  day,  who  never  had  appeared  to  be  moved  with  concern 
 for  their  fouls  before. 
 
 Thofe  that  had  obtained  relief  and  comfort,  and  had  given 
 hopeful  evidences  of  baring  pafTed  a  faving  change,  appeared 
 humble  and  devout,  and  behaved  in  an  agreeable  and  Chriftian 
 manner.  I  was  refreflied  to  fee  the  tendernefs  of  confciencc 
 manifefl  in  fome  of  them,  one  inftance  of  which  I  cannot  but 
 take  notice  of.  Perceiving  one  of  them  very  forrowful  in  the 
 morning,  I  inquired  into  the  caufe  of  her  forrow,  and  found 
 the  difficulty  v/as,  fhe  had  been  angry  with  her  child  the 
 evening  before,  and  was  now  exercifed  with  fears,  left  her 
 anger  had  been  inordinate  and  iinful,  which  fo  grieved  her 
 that  fhe  waked  and  began  to  fob  before  daylight,  and  conti- 
 Hued  weeping  for  feveral  hours  together. 
 
 Auguft  14.  Spent  the  day  with  the  Indians.  There  was 
 one  of  them  who  had  fome  time  fince  put  away  his  wife,  (as 
 is  common  among  them),  and  taken  another  v*^oman,  and  be- 
 ing now  brought  under  fome  fcrious  impreftions,  was  much 
 concerned  about  that  affair  in  particular,  and  feemed  fully 
 convinced  of  the  wickednefs  of  that  praftice,  and  earneftly 
 defirous  to  know  what  God  would  have  him  do  in  his  prefent 
 circuraftances.  When  the  law  of  God  refpefling  marriage 
 had  been  opened  to  them,  and  the  caufe  of  his  leaving  his 
 wife  inquired  into;  and  when  it  appeared  fhe  had  given  him 
 HO  juft  occafion  by  unchajlity  to  defert  her,  and  that  fhe  was 
 willing  to  forgive  his  paft  mifconduft,  an<l  to  live  peaceably 
 
 witk 
 
^44      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPL^YEO 
 
 with  him  for  the  future,  and  that  llie  moreover  infif>ed  on  U' 
 as  her  right  to  enjoy  him ;  he  was  then  icid,  that  it  was  his 
 indifpenfible  duty  to  renounce  the  woniSn  he  had  laft  taken, 
 and  receive  the  other  who  wa>  his  proper  wife,  and  live  peace- 
 ably with  her  during  life;  with  which  he  readily  and  cheer- 
 fully complied,  and  thereupon  publicly  renounced  the  woman- 
 he  had  Jaft  taken,  and  publicly  promifed  to  live  with  and  be 
 kind  to  his  wife  during  life,  (he  alfo  promiiing  the  fame  to 
 
 him. And   here  appeared   a  clear   demonflration   of  the' 
 
 power  of  God's  word  upon  their  hearts.  I  fuppofc  a  few 
 weeks  before  the  whole  world  could  not  have  perfuaded  this 
 man  to  a  compliance  with  Chriftian  rules  In  this  aifliir. 
 
 1  was  not  without  fears,  left  this  proceeding  might  be  like 
 putting  "  Mew  wine  into  old  bottles,"  and  that  fomc  njight  be 
 prejudiced  againll  Chriftianity,  when  they  faw  the  overtures 
 made  by  it.  But  the  man  being  much  concerned  about  the 
 matter,  the  determination  of  it  could  be  deferred  no  longer,  and 
 it  feenied  to  have  a  good,  rather  than  an  ill  eifcft  among  the 
 Indians,  who  generally  owned,  that  the  laws  of  Chrifl  were 
 good  and  right  refpeffing  the  affairs  of  marriage. 
 
 In  the  afternoon  I  preached  to  them  from  the  apoftle's  dii- 
 courfe  to  Cornelius,  Ads  x.  34.  dc.  There  appeared  fome 
 afFeflionate  concern  among  them,  though  not  equal  to  what 
 appeared  in  feveral  of  the  former  days.  They  flill  attended 
 and  heard  as  for  their  lives,  and  the  Lord's  work  feemed  flill  to 
 be  promoted,  and  propagated  among  them. 
 
 Auguft  lij.   Preached  from  Luke  iv.  16. 21.   The  word 
 
 Was  attended  with  power  upon  the  hearts  of  the  hearers. 
 There  was  much  concern,  many  tears,  and  afFcf^ing  cries 
 am.ong  them,  and  fome  in  a  fpecial  manner  were  deeply 
 wounded  and  diftrefTed  for  their  fouls.  Ihere  were  fome 
 newly  awakened  who  came  but  this  week,  and  convidfions 
 feemed  to  be  promoted  in  others. —  Thofe  that  had  received 
 comfort,  were  likewife  refrefhed  and  flrcngthened,  and  the 
 "work  of  grace  appeared  to  advance  in  all  rcfpcfls.  Ihe  faf 
 Jions  of  the  congregation  in  general  were  not  fo  rruch  moved, 
 as  in  fome  days  part,  but  their  hearts  feemed  as  folemnly  and 
 deeply  affecled  with  divine  truths  as  ever,  at  leafl  in  many  in- 
 ftances,  although  the  concern  did  not  feem  to  be  fo  univerfal, 
 and  to  reach  every  individual  in  fuch  a  manner  as  it  had  ap- 
 peared to  do  fome  days  before. 
 
 Augufl  16.  Spent  confiderable  time  in  converfmg  privately 
 with  fundry  of  the  Indians.  Found  one  that  had  got  relief 
 and  comfort,  after  preiTing  concern,  and  coild  not  but  hope, 
 
 when 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  345 
 
 ■when  I  came  to  difcourfe  particularly  with  her,  that  her  com- 
 fort was  of  the  right  kind. 
 
 In  the  afternoon  preached  to  them  from  John  vi.  i(^. — 34. 
 Toward  the  clofe  of  my  difcourfe,  divine  truths  were  attend- 
 ed with  confiderable  power  upon  the  audience,  and  more  e- 
 ipecially  after  public  fervice  was  over,  when  I  particularly 
 addreffed  fundry  diftreffed  perfon*. 
 
 There  was  a  great  concern  for  their  fouls  fpread  pretty  ge- 
 nerally among  them :  but  efpecially  there  were  two  per  ions 
 newly  awakened  to  a  fenfe  of  their  lln  and  mifcry,  one  of 
 whom  was  lately  come,  and  the  other  had  all  along  been  very 
 attentive,  and  defirous  of  being  awakened,  but  could  never 
 before  have  any  lively  view  of  her  perilhing  ftate.  '  But  now 
 her  concern  and  fpiritual  diftrefs  was  fuch,  that,  I  thought,  I 
 had  never  feen  any  more  prclhng.  Sundry  old  men  were  alfo 
 in  diftrefs  for  their  fouls  ;  io  that  they  could  not  refrain  from 
 weeping  and  crying  out  aloud,  and  their  bitter  groans  were 
 the  mofl  convincing,  as  v.'ell  as  alfefting  evidence  of  the  rea- 
 lity and  depth  of  their  inward  anguifh, — God  is  powerfully 
 at  work  imong  them. !  True  and  genuine  convidli jns  of  fm 
 are  daily  promoted  in  many  inftances,  and  fome  are  new- 
 Jy  awaktned  from  time  to  time,  although  fome  few,  who  felt, 
 a  commotion  in  their  pajjions  in  days  paft,  feem  now  to 
 difcover  that  their  hearts  were  never  duly  affefted.  I  never 
 faw  the  work  of  God  appear  fo  independent  of  means  as  at 
 this  time.  I  difcourfed  to  the  people,  and  fpoke  what  (I  fup-  , 
 pofe)  had  a  proper  tendency  to  promote  convi61;i<.ns ;  and 
 God's  manner  of  working  upon  them  appeared  f  k  entirely 
 fupernaticral,  and  abjve  means,  that  I  could  fcarcc  believe  he 
 ufed  me  as  an  infirwnent,  or  what  I  fpake  as  means  of  carr}'- 
 iiig  on  his  work ;  fur  it  feemed,  as  1  thought,  to  have  no 
 connexion  with,  nor  dependence  upon  means  in  any  relpeft. 
 And  although  I  could  not  but  continue  to  ufe  the  meanb  I 
 thought  proper  for  the  promotion  of  the  work,  yet  God 
 feemed  (as  I  apprehended)  to  work  entirely  without  them  : 
 fo  that  I  feemed  to  do  nothing,  and  indeed  to  have  nothing 
 to  do,  but  to  "  ftand  flill  and  fee  the  falvation  of  God  •/'  and 
 found  my felf obliged  and  delighted  to  fay,  "Not  unto  us," 
 .not  unto  inflruments  and  means,  "  but  to  thy  name  be  glory.'* 
 God  appeared  to  work  entirely  alone,  and  I  fav^  no  room  to 
 attribute  any  part  of  this  work  to  any  created  arm. 
 
 Augaft  17.  Spent  much  time  in  private  conferences  with 
 the  Indians.  Found  one  who  had  nculy  obtained  relief  and 
 comfort,  after  a  long  feafon  of  fpiritual  trouble  and  diflrefs, 
 (he  having  been  one  of  my  hearers  in  the  Forks  of  Delaware 
 
 X  X  for 
 
34^      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 for  more  than  a  year,  and  now  followed  me  here  under  deep 
 
 concern  for  his  Ibul),  and  had  abundant  reafon  to  hope  that 
 his  comfort  was  well  grounded,  and  truly  divine. 
 
 Afterwards  difcourfed  publicly  from  Afts  viii.  29. 39.; 
 
 and  took  occafion  to  treat  concerning  baptifm,  in  order  to 
 their  being  inftru(fted  and  prepared  to  partake  of  that  ordi- 
 nance. They  were  yet  hungry  and  thirfty  for  the  word  of 
 God,  and  appeared  univearled  in  their  attendance  upon  it. — 
 
 Lord's  day,  x\uguft  18.  Preached  in  the  forenoon  to  an 
 aflembly  oil  white  people,  made  up  of  Prelbyterians,  Baptifts, 
 Quakers,  6c.  Afterwards  preached  to  the  Indians  from 
 John  vi.  35. — 40.  There  was  confiderable  concern  vifible  a- 
 mong  them,  though  not  equal  to  what  has  frequently  appear- 
 ed of  late. 
 
 Auguft  19.  Preached  from  If.  Iv.  i.  Divine  truths  were 
 attended  with  power  upon  thofe  who  had  received  comfort, 
 and  others  alfo.  The  former  were  fweetly  melted  and  re- 
 fre/hed  with  divine  invitations,  the  latter  much  concerned  for 
 their  fouls,  that  they  might  obtain  an  interefl  in  thefe  glori- 
 ous gofpel-provifions  that  were  let  before  them.  There  were 
 numbers  of  poor  impotent  fouls  that  waited  at  the  pool  for 
 healing,  and  the  Jngel  feemed,  as  at  other  times  of  late,  to 
 trouble  the  waters:  io  that  there  was  yet  a  moft  defirable  and 
 comfortable  profpe(ft  of  the  fpiritual  recovery  of  difcafed  pe- 
 rilling fmners. 
 
 Auguft  23.  Spent  fome  time  with  the  Indians  in  private 
 difcourfe ;  afterwards  preached  to  them  from  John  vi.  44. 
 — t^o.  There  was,  as  has  been  ufual,  a  great  attention  and 
 fome  affeftion  among  them.  Several  appeared  deeply  con- 
 cerned for  their  fouls,  and  could  not  but  exprefs  their  inward 
 anguifh  by  tears  and  cries.  But  the  amazing  divine  influence 
 that  has  been  fo  powerfully  among  them  in  general,  feems, 
 at  prefent,  in  fome  degree  abated,  at  leaft  in  regard  of  its  uni- 
 verfality,  though  many  that  have  got  no  fpecial  comfort, 
 ftill  retain  deep  imprelTions  of  divine  things. 
 
 Auguft  24.  Spent  the  forenoon  in  difcourfmg  to  fome  of 
 the  Indians,  in  order  to  their  receiving  the  ordinance  of  bap- 
 tifm.  When  I  had  opened  the  nature  of  the  ordinance,  the 
 obligations  attending  it,  the  duty  of  devoting  ourfelves  to 
 God  in  it,  and  the  privilege  of  being  in  covenant  with  him, 
 iundry  of  them  feemed  to  be  lallcd  with  love  to  God,  and  de- 
 lighted with  the  thoughts  of  giving  up  themfelves  to  him  in 
 that  folemn  and  public  manner,  melted  and  refrcftied  with  the 
 hopes  of  enjoying  the  bleffed  Redeemer. 
 
 Afterwards  I  difcourfed  publicly  from  i  Theff.  iv.  13. — 17?- 
 
 There 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  347 
 
 There  was  a  folemn  attention,  and  Tome  vifible  concern  and 
 affeclion  in  the  time  of  public  fervice,  which  was  afterwards 
 increafed  by  fome  further  exhortation  given  them  to  come  to 
 Chrift,  and  give  up  their  hearts  to  him,  that  they  might  be 
 £ttcd  to  "  afcend  up  and  meet  him  in  the  air,"  when  he  fhall 
 "  defcend  with  a  ihout,  and  the  voice  of  the  archangel." 
 
 There  were  feveral  Indians  newly  come,  who  thought  their 
 ftate  good,  and  themfelves  happy,  becaufe  they  had  fome- 
 times  lived  with  the  white  people  under  gofpcl-light,  had 
 learned  to  read,  were  civil,  ^c.  although  they  appeared  utter 
 ilrangers  to  their  own  hearts,  and  altogether  unacquainted 
 with  the  power  of  religion,  as  well  as  with  the  do^rines  of 
 grace.  With  thofe  I  dlfcourfed  particularly  after  public 
 worfliip,  and  was  furprifed  to  fee  their  felf-righteous  difpo- 
 fition,  their  ftrong  attachment  to  the  covenant  of  works  for 
 falvation,  and  the  high  value  they  put  upon  their  fuppofed 
 attainments.  Yet  after  much  difcourfe,  one  appeared  in  a 
 meafure  convinced,  that  "  by  the  deeds  of  the  law  no  fiefn 
 "  living  fhould  be  juftified,"  and  wept  bitterly,  inquiring, 
 "  what  he  mull  do  to  be  faved  ?" 
 
 This  was  very  comfortable  to  others,  who  had  gained  fome 
 experimental  acquaintance  with  their  own  hearts  ;  for  before 
 they  were  grieved  with  the  converfation  and  condu6l  of  thefe  ' 
 new-comers,  who  boafted  of  their  knowledge,  and  thought 
 well  of  themfelves,  but  evidently  difcovered  to  thofe  that  had 
 any  experience  of  divine  truths,  that  they  knew  nothing  of 
 their  own  hearts. 
 
 Lord's  day,  Auguft  25.  Preached  in  the  forenoon  from 
 Luke  XV.  3. — 7.  There  being  a  multitude  of  white  people 
 prefent,  I  made  an  addrefs  to  them  at  the  clofe  of  my  dif- 
 courfe to  the  Indians :  but  could  not  fD  much  as  keep  them 
 orderly ;  for  fcores  of  them  kept  walking  and  gazing  about, 
 and  behaved  more  indecently  than  ptiy  Indians  1  ever  addrefl^ 
 ed;  and  a  view  of  their  abuftve  conduct  fo  funk  my  fpirits, 
 that  I  could  fcarce  go  on  with  my  work. 
 
 In  the  afternoon  difcourfed  from  Rev.  iii.  20.  at  which 
 time  the  Indians  behaved  ferioully,  though  many  others  were 
 vain. 
 
 Afterwards  baptized  twenty-five  perfons  of  the  Indians, 
 fifteen  adults,  and  ten  children.  Moil  or  the  adults  I  have 
 comfortable  reafon  to  hope  are  renewed  perfcns;  and  there 
 was  not  one  of  them  but  what  I  entertained  fome  hopes  of 
 in  that  refpeft,  though  the  cafe  of  two  or  three  of  them  ap- 
 peared more  d jubtful. 
 
 After  the  croud  of  fpe£lators  was  gone,  I  called  the  bap- 
 
 X  X  2  "  tized 
 
348      DIVINE     GRACE    DISPLAYED 
 
 tized  perfons  together,  and  difcourfed  to  them  in  particular, 
 at  the  fame  time  inviting  others  to  attend,  minded  them  of 
 the  folemn  obligations  they  were  now  under  to  live  to  God, 
 warned  them  of  the  evil  and  dreadful  confequences  of  care- 
 lefs  living,  efpecially  afrer  this  public  profelfion  of  Chrifti- 
 anity;  gave  them  diredlions  for  their  future  conduft,  and 
 encouraged  them  to  watchfulnefs  and  devotion,  by  fetting 
 before  them  the  comftrt  and  happy  conclujion  of  a  religious 
 
 life. This  was  a  defirable  and  Iweet  feafon  indeed !   Their 
 
 hearts  were  engaged  and  cheerful  in  duty,  and  they  rejoiced 
 that  they  had  in  a  public  and  folemn  manner  dedicated  them- 
 felves  to  God. —  Love  feemed  to  reign  among  them  I  They 
 took  each  other  by  the  h^nd  vith  tendernefs  and  afFeftion, 
 as  if  their  hearts  were  knit  together,  while  I  was  difcourfmg 
 to  them :  and  all  their  deportment  toward  each  other  was 
 fuch,  thzt  z  fen ous  fpe^at or  niight  juftly  be  excited  to  cry 
 cut  with  admiration,  "  Behold  how  they  love  one  another  l" 
 Sundry  of  the  other  Indians  at  ieeing  and  hearing  thefe  things, 
 were  much  afFeded  and  wept  bitterly,  longing  to  be  partakers 
 of  the  fame  joy  and  comfort  that  thefe  difcovcred  by  their 
 very  countenances  as  well  as  conducl:. 
 
 Augul]  26.  Preached  to  my  people  from  John  vi.  51. — 55, 
 After  I  had  difcourfed  fome  time,  I  addreffed  thofe  in  par- 
 ticular who  entertained  hopes  that  they  were  **  pafftd  from 
 *'  death  to  life."  Opened  to  them  the  perfevering.  nature  of 
 thefe  confulations  Chr'iii  gives  his  people,  and  which  I  truft* 
 ed  he  had  beftowed  upon  fome  in  that  afTembly,  (hewed  them 
 that  fuch  have  already  the  "  beginnings  of  eternal  life,** 
 (verf.  34.)  and  that  their  heaven  (hall  fpeedily  be  completed, 
 6c. 
 
 I  no  fooner  began  to  difcourfe  in  this  ftrain,  but  the  dear 
 Chr'iji'ians  in  the  congregation  began  to  be  melted  with  affec- 
 tion to,  and  defire  of  the  enjoyment  of  Chrift,  and  of  a  flatc 
 of  perfect  purity.  They  wept  aifeftionately  and  yet  joyfully, 
 and  their  tears  and  fobs  difcovered  brokennefs  of  heart,  and 
 yet  were  attended  with  red  coirfort  and  Jixieetnefs ;  fo  that 
 this  was  a  tender,  affeflie^nate,  humble,  delightful  melting, 
 and  appeared  to  be  the  genuine  effect  of  a  Spirit  of  cidoptio7t, 
 and  very  far  from  that  Spirit  of  bondage  that  they  not  long 
 ilncc  laboured  under.  The  influence  feemed  to  fpread  from 
 thefe  through  the  whole  afTembly,  and  there  quickly  appear- 
 cd  a  wonderful  concern  among  them.  Many  who  had  not 
 yet  found  Chrift  as  an  all-fufficient  Saviour,  were  furprifmg- 
 ly  engaged  in  feeking  after  him.  It  was  indeed  a  lovely  and 
 very  dciirable  afTembly.   Their  number  was  now  about  ninety- 
 
 five 
 
AMONG    THE    INDIANS.  349 
 
 jive  perfons,  old  and  young,  and  almofV  all  afFecled  either 
 with  joy  in  Chrift  Jefus,  or  with  utmojl  concern  to  obtain  an 
 intereft  in  him. 
 
 Being  fully  convinced  it  vas  now  my  duty  to  take  a  journey  , 
 far  back  to  the  Indians  on  Sufquahannah  river,  (it  being  n  ;w 
 a  proper  feafon  of  the  jear  to  find  them  generally  at  hoo.e), 
 after  having  fpent  fome  hours  in  public  and  private  dilcourl^ 
 with  my  people,  I  told  them  that  I  muft  now  leave  tKem  for 
 the  prefent,  and  go  to  their  brethren  far  remote,  and  preach 
 to  them ;  that  I  wanted  the  Spirit  of  God  (hould  go  uith  me, 
 without  whom  nothing  could  be  done  to  any  good  purpofe 
 among  the  Indians,  as  they  themfelves  had  had  oppoi  tunny 
 to  fee  and  obferve  by  the  barrennefs  of  our  meetings  at  iome 
 times,  when  there  was  much  pains  taken  to  afFeft  and  awaken 
 finners,  and  yet  to  little  or  no  purpofe :  and  alked  them,  if 
 they  could  not  be  willing  to  fpend  the  remainder  of  the  day 
 in  prayer  for  me,  that  God  would  go  with  me,  and  fucceed  my 
 endeavours  for  the  converfion  of  thofe  poor  fouls.  They 
 cheerfully  complied  with  the  motion,  and  foon  after  I  left 
 them  (the  fun  being  then  about  an  hour  and  half  high  at 
 night)  they  began,  and  continued  praying  all  night  till  hi  eak  of 
 day,  or  very  near,  never  miftrufting  (they  tell  me)  till  they  \x  ent 
 out  and  viewed  the  ftars,  and  faw  the  nmning-Jlar  a  confidcr- 
 able  height,  that  it  was  later  than  common  bed-time.  T  hus 
 eager  and  unwearied  were  they  in  their  devotions !  A  remark- 
 able night  it  was,  attended  (as  my  interpreter  tells  me)  with  a 
 jpowerful  influence  upon  thofe  who  were  yet  under  concern, 
 as  well  as  thofe  that  had  received  comfort. 
 
 There  were,  I  truft,  this  day  two  diftrefTed  fouls  brought 
 to  the  enjoyment  of  folid  comfort  in  him,  in  whom  the  "weary 
 find  reft. 
 
 It  was  like  wife  remarkable,  that  this  day  an  dd  Indian, 
 who  has  all  his  days  been  an  obftinate  idolater y  was  brought 
 to  give  up  his  rattles  (which  they  ufe  for  mufic  in  their  idola- 
 trous feafts  and  dances)  to  the  other  Indians,  who  quickly 
 deftroyed  them;  and  this  without  any  attempt  of  mine  in  the 
 affair,  I  having  faid  nothing  to  him  about  it ;  fo  that  it  feem- 
 ied  it  was  nothing  bat  juft  the  power  of  God's  word,  without 
 any  particular  application  to  this  fm,  that  produced  this  ef- 
 fect. Thus  God  has  begun,  thus  he  has  hitherto  furprifmgly 
 carried  on  a  work  of  grace  amongft  thefe  Indians.  May  the 
 glory  be  afcribed  to  him,  who  is  the  fole  author  of  it! 
 
 Forks 
 
350      DIVINE     GRACE    DISPLAYED 
 
 Forks  of  Delaware  in  Pennfylvania,  1 745. 
 
 Lord's  4ay,  September  i.  Preached  to  the  Indians  here  from 
 
 Luke  xiv.  16. 23.  The  word  appeared  to  be  attended  with 
 
 fbme  power,  and  caufed  Ibme  tears  in  the  afTembly. 
 
 After\<'ards  preached  to  a  number  of  -white  people  prefent, 
 and  obTerved  many  of  them  in  tears,  and  fome  who  had  for- 
 merly been  as  carelels  and  unconcerned  about  religion  per- 
 haps as  the  Indians. 
 
 Towards  night  difcourfed  to  the  Indians  again,  and  per- 
 ceived a  greater  attention,  and  more  vifible  concern  among 
 them  than  has  been  ufual  in  thtje  parts. 
 
 September  3.  Preached  to  the  Indians  from  If.  liii.  3. — 6. 
 The  divine  prefence  feemed  to  be  in  the  midft  of  the  affembly, 
 and  a  confiderable  concern  fpread  amongft  them.  Sundry  per- 
 fons  feemed  to  be  awakened,  amongft  whom  were  two  ftupid 
 creatures  that  I  could  fcarce  ever  before  keep  awake  while  I 
 was  difcourfing  to  them.  Could  not  but  rejoice  at  this  ap- 
 pearance.of  things,  although  at  the  fame  time  I  could  not  but 
 fear  left  the  concern  they  at  prefent  manifefted,  might  prove 
 like  a  morn'ng-cloud,  as  fomcthing  of  that  nature  had  for- 
 merly done  in  thefe  parts. 
 
 Septdiber  5.  Dilcourfed  to  the  Indians  from  the  parable 
 of  the  fowrr,  afterwards  converfed  particularly  with  fundry 
 perfons,  which  occafioned  them  to  weep,  and  even  to  cry 
 out  in  an  affcfting  manner,  and  feized  others  with  furprife 
 and  concern ;  and  I  doubt  not  but  that  a  divine  power  ac- 
 comp.inied  what  was  then  Ipoken.  Sundry  of  thefe  perfons 
 had  been  with  me  to  Crofweekfung,  and  had  there  feen,  and 
 fome  of  them,  I  truft,  felt  the  power  of  God's  word  in  an 
 effe&ual  and  faving  manner.  I  afked  one  of  them,  who  had 
 obtained  comfort,  and  given  hopeful  evidences  of  being  truly 
 religious,  why  he  now  cried?  He  replied,  "When  he 
 "  thought  how  Chrift  was  flain  like  a  lamb,  and  fpilt  his 
 *'  blood  for  finners,  he  could  not  help  ciying,  when  he  was 
 **  all  alone  :"  and  thereupon  burft  out  into  tears  and  cries 
 again.  1  then  afked  his  wife,  who  had  like  wife  been  abun- 
 dantly comforted,  wherefore  fhe  cried  ?  She  anfwered, 
 *^  She  was  grieved  that  the  Indians  here  v/ould  not  come  to 
 *'  Chrift,  as  well  as  thofe  at  Crofweekfung.''  I  afked  her  if 
 fhe  found  a  heart  to  pray  for  them,  and  whether  Chrift  had 
 feemed  to  be  near  to  her  of  late  in  prayer,  as  in  time  paft? 
 (which  is  m.y  ufual  method  of  expceiling  a  fenfe  of  the  divine 
 
 prefence.) 
 
AMONG     THE    INDIANS.  35! 
 
 prefence.)  She  replied,  "Yes,  he  had  been  near  to  her; 
 "  and  that  at  fome  times  when  fhe  had  been  praying  alone, 
 "  her  heart  loved  to  pray  fo,  that  (he  could  not  bear  to  leave 
 "  the  place,  but  vi^anted  to  flay  and  pray  longer." 
 
 September  7.  Preached  to  the  Indians  from  John  vi.  35. — 
 39.  There  was  not  fo  much  appearance  of  concern  among 
 them  as  at  feveral  other  times  of  late ;  yet  they  appeared  fe- 
 rious  and  attentive. 
 
 Lord's  day,  September  8.  Difcourfed  to  the  Indians  in  the 
 forenoon  from  John  xii.  44.  50.  in  the  afternoon  from  A£ls 
 ii.  36. —  ^9.  The  word  of  God  at  this  time  feemed  to  fall 
 with  we'ght  and  influence  upon  them.  There  were  but  few 
 prefent,  but  moft  that  were,  were  in  tears,  and  fundry  cried 
 out  under  diftrefling  concern  for  their  fouls. 
 
 There  was  one  man  confiderably  awakened,  who  never 
 before  difcovered  any  concern  for  his  foul.  There  appeared 
 a  remarkable  work  of  the  divine  Spirit  among  them,  almofl: 
 generally,  not  unlike  what  has  been  of  late  at  Crofweekfung. 
 Jt  feemed  as  if  the  divine  influence  had  fpread  from  thence  to 
 this  place  ;  although  fomething  of  it  appeared  here  in  the 
 awakening  of  my  interpreter,  his  wife,  and  fome  fev/ others. 
 
 Sundiy  of  the  carelefs  white  people  now  prefent  were  a- 
 wakened,  (or  at  leaft  ftartled),  feeing  the  power  of  God  fo  pre- 
 valent among  the  Indians.  I  then  made  a  particular  addrefs 
 to  them,  which  feemed  to  make  fome  impreflion  upon  them, 
 and  excite  fome  affe<Slion  in  them. 
 
 There  are  fundry  Indians  in  thefe  parts  who  have  always 
 refufed  to  hear  me  preach,  and  have  been  enraged  againft 
 thofe  that  have  attended  my  preaching.  But  of  late  they  are 
 more  bitter  than  ever,  fcoffing  at  Chrifl:ianity,  and  fomedmes 
 afking  my  hearers,  "  How  often  they  have  cried?"  and  "whe- 
 **  therthey  have  not  nov/  cried  enough  to  do  the  turn?"  dc. 
 So  that  they  have  already  "  trial  of  cruel  mockings." 
 
 September  9.  Left  the  Indians  in  the  Forks  of  Delaware, 
 and  fet  out  on  a  journey  towards  Sufquahannah-river,  direfting 
 my  courfe  towards  the  Indian-town  more  than  an  hundred 
 and  twenty  miles  weft-ward  from  the  Forks.  Travelled  about 
 fifteen  miles,  and  there  lodged. 
 
 September  13.  After  having  lodged  out  three  nights,  ar- 
 rived at  the  Indian-town  I  aimed  at  on  Sufquahannah,  called 
 Shaumoking,  (one  of  the  places,  and  the  largeft  of  them, 
 that  I  vifited  in  May  laft),  and  was  kindly  received  and  enter- 
 tained by  the  Indians:  but  had  little  fatisfadtion  by  reafon  of 
 the  Heathenifli  dance  and  revel  they  then  held  in  the  houfe 
 where  I  was  obliged  to  lodge,  which   1  could  not  fupprefs, 
 
 though 
 
^52      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 though  I  often  intreated  them  to  defift,  for  the  fake  of  oHe 
 of  rheir  own  friends  who  was  then  fick  in   the  houfe,  and 
 
 whofe  diforders  was  much  aggravated  by  the  noifc. Alas! 
 
 how  deftitute  of  natural  affe£iion  are  thefe  poor  uncultivated 
 Pagans !  although  they  feem  fomewhat  kind  in  their  own 
 •way.  Of  a  truth,  "  the  dark  corners  of  the  earth  are  full  of 
 "  the  habitations  of  cruelty." 
 
 This  town  (as  I  obferved  in  my  Journal  of  May  laft)  lies 
 partly  on  the  eaft  fiJe  of  the  river,  partly  on  the  weft,  and 
 partly  on  a  large  illand  in  it,  and  contains  Upwards  of  fifty 
 hjufes,  and  (they  tell  me)  near  three  hundred  perfons,  though 
 I  never  faw  much  more  than  half  that  number  in  it ;  but  of 
 three  different  tribes  of  Indians,  fpeaking  three  languages 
 wholly  unintelligible  to  each  other.  About  one  half  of  its 
 inhabitants  are  Delawares,  the  others  called  Senakas,  and 
 Tutelas.  The  Indians  of  this  place  are  counted  the  moft 
 drunken,  mifchievous,  and  ruffninly  felioius  of  any  in  thefe 
 parts ;  and  Satan  feems  to  have  his  feat  in  this  toxurt  in  an  e- 
 minent  manner. 
 
 September  14.  Vifited  the  Delaware  king,  (who  was  fup- 
 pofed  to  be  at  the  point  of  death  when  I  was  here  in  May 
 laft,  but  was  now  recovered),  and  difcourfed  with  him  and 
 others  refpecling  Chriftianity,  and  fpent  the  afternoon  with 
 them,  and  had  more  encouragement  than  I  expelled.  The 
 king  appeared  kindly  difporrd,  and  willing  to  be  inftrufted: 
 this  gave  me  fome  encouragement  that  God  would  open  an 
 effe^ual  door  for  my  preaching  the  gofpel  here,  and  fet  up 
 his  kingdom  in  this  place.  Which  was  a  fupport  and  refrefti- 
 ment  to  me  in  the  wildcrnefs,  and  rendered  my  folitary  cir- 
 cumflances  comfortable  and  pleafant. 
 
 Lord's  day,  September  15.  yifited  the  chief  of  the  Dela- 
 wares again  ;  was  kindly  received  by  him,  and  difcourfed  to 
 the  Indians  in  the  afternoon.  Still  entertained  hopes  that  God 
 would  open  their  hearts  to  receive  the  gofpel,  though  many 
 of  them  in  the  place  were  fo  drunk  from  day  to  day,  that  f 
 could  get  no  opportunity  to  fpeak  to  them.  Towards  night 
 difcourfed  with  one  tha^t  underftood  the  languages  of  the  Six 
 Nations,  (as  they  are  ufuaily  called),  who  difcovered  an  in- 
 clination to  hearken  to  Chriftianity ;  which  gave  nie  feme 
 hopes  that  the  gofpel  might  hereafter  be  fent  to  thofe  nation? 
 far  remote. 
 
 September  16.  Spent  the  forenoon  with  the  Indians,  en- 
 deavouring to  inftruft  them  from  houfe  to  houfe,  and  to  en- 
 gage them,  as  far  as  I  could,  to  be  friendly  to  Chriftianity. 
 
 Towards  night  went  to  one  part  of  the  town  where  they 
 
 were 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  355. 
 
 •were/oher,  and  got  together  near  fifty  perf^ns  of  them,  and 
 difcourfed  to  the.n,  having  fi;  ft  obtained  tfie  king's  cheerful  con- 
 fent.  -There  was  a  furprifing  attention  among  them,  and 
 they  manifefted  a  eondderable  defire  of  being  further  inftrufl- 
 cd.  There  was  alfo  one  or  two  that  feemed  to  be  touched 
 with  fome  concern  for  their  fouls,  who  appeared  well  pleafed 
 with  (omc  converfation  in  private,  after  1  had  concluded  my 
 public  difcourfe  to  them. 
 
 jMy  fpirits  were  much  refrcfhed  with  this  appearance  of 
 things,  and  I  could  not  but  return  with  my  interpreter  (having 
 no  other  companion  in  this  journey)  to  my  poor  hard  lodgings, 
 rejoicing  in  hopes  that  God  defigned  to  iet  up  his  kingdom 
 here,  where  Satan  now  reigns  in  the  moft  eminent  manner; 
 and  found  uncoitinion  freedom  in  addrciTing  the  throne  of, 
 grace  for  the  accomplifliment  of  fo  great  and  glorious  a 
 work. 
 
 September  17.  Spent  the  forenoon  in  vifiting  and  difcouf-  - 
 ling  to  the  Indians.     About  noon  left  Shaumoking,  (moft   of 
 the  Indians  going  out  this  day  on  their  hunting  defign),  and 
 travelled  down  the  river  fouth-weftward. 
 
 September  19.  Vifited  an  Indian  town  called  Juneauta, 
 fituate  on  an  iiland  in  Sufquahannah.  Was  much  difcouraged 
 with  the  temper  and  behaviour  of  the  Indians  here,  although 
 they  appeared  friendly  when  I  was  with  them  the  laft  fpring, 
 and  then  gave  me  encouragement  to  come  and  fee  them  a- 
 gain.  But  they  now  feemed  refolved  to  retain  their  Pagan 
 notions,  and  perfift  in  their  idolatrous  praclices. 
 
 September  -20.  Vifited  the  Indians  again  at  Juneauta  ifland> 
 and  found  them  almoft  univcrfaily  very  bufy  in  making  pre- 
 parations for  a  grc2Ltfacrifice  and  dance.  Had  no  opportuni- 
 ty to  get  them  together  in  order  to  difcourfe  v.'ith  them  about 
 Chriftianity,  by  reafon  of  their  being  fo  much  engaged  about 
 theiry^cr/^Cif.  My  fpirits  were  much  funk  with  a  profpcft 
 fo  very  difcouraging,  and  efpccially  feeing  I  had  now  no  in- 
 terpreter but  a  Pagan,  who  was  as  much  attached  to  iddatTy 
 as  any  of  them,  (my  own  interpretv'r  having  left  me  the  day 
 before,  being  obliged  to  attend  upon  fome  important  bufinefs 
 otherwhere,  and  knowing  that  he  could  neither  fpeak  nor  un- 
 derftand  the  language  of /A»f/e'  Indians);  ^o  that  I  was  under 
 the  greateft  difadvantages  imaginable.  However,  I  attempt- 
 ed to  difcourfe  privately  with  fome  of  them,  but  without  any 
 appearance  of  fuccefs:  notwithftanding  I  ftill  tarried  with 
 them. 
 
 In  the  evening  they  met  together,  near  a  hundred  of  them, 
 and  danced  round  a  large  fire,  having  prepared  ten   fat  deer 
 
 Y  y  for 
 
^54      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAtED 
 
 for  ihefacrifice.  The  fat  of  whofe  inwards  they  burnt  in 
 the  fire  while  they  were  dancing,  and  fometimes  raifed  the 
 flame  to  a  prodigious  height,  at  the  fame  time  yelling  and 
 ihouting  in  fuch  a  manner,  that  they  might  eafily  have  been 
 heard  two  miles  or  more. 
 
 They  continued  tht'vv  facred  dance  all  night,  or  near  the 
 matter  ;  after  which  they  ate  the  fiejh  of  the  facrifce,  and  fo 
 retired  each  one  to  his  lodging. 
 
 I  enjoyed  little  fatisfaflion  this  night,  being  entirely  alone 
 on  the  ifland,  (as  to  any  Chriftian  company),  and  in  the  midft 
 of  this  Idolatrous  revel ;  and  having  walked  to  and  fro  till 
 body  and  mind  were  pained  and  much  opprefTed,  I  at  length 
 crept  into  a  little  crib  made  for  corn,  and  there  flept  on  the 
 poles. 
 
 Lord's  day,  September  21.  Spent  the  day  with  the  Indians 
 on  the  illand.  As  foon  as  they  were  well  up  in  the  morning, 
 I  attempted  to  inflrucfc  them,  and  laboured  for  that  purpofe 
 to  get  them  together,  but  quickly  found  they  had  fomething 
 elfe  to  do ;  for  near  noon  they  gathered  together  all  their 
 po-duivows,  (or  conjurers),  and  fet  about  half  a  dozen  of  them 
 to  playing  their  juggling  tricks,  and  acting  their  frantic  di- 
 ilracted  poflures,  in  order  to  find  out  why  they  were  then  fo 
 llckl^^  upon  the  ilhnd,  numbers  of  them  being  at  that  time 
 difordered  with  a  fever,  and  bloody  flux.  In  this  cxercifc 
 they  were  engaged  for  feveral  hours,  making  all  the  wild,  ridi- 
 culous, and  diftra<5led  motions  imaginable;  fometimes finging; 
 fometimes  howling ;  fometimes  extending  their  hands  to  the 
 utmoft  ftretch,  fpreading  all  their  fingers,  and  feemedto  pu/li 
 with  them,  as  if  they  defigned  to  fright  fomething  away,  or 
 zt  leaft  keep  it  off  at  arms-end  ;  fometimes  ftroking  their 
 faces  with  their  hands,  then  fpurting  water  as  fine  as  mift ; 
 fometimes  fetting  flat  on  the  earth,  then  bowing  down  their 
 faces  to  the  ground;  wringing  their  fides,  as  if  in  pain  and 
 anguifh ;  twilling  their  faces,  turning  up  their  eyes,  grunting, 
 puffing,  ^c. 
 
 Their  monftrous  aftions  tended  to  excite  ideas  of  horror, 
 and  feemed  to  have  fomething  in  them  (as  I  thought)  pecu- 
 liarly fulted  to  raife  the  devil,  if  he  could  be  raifed  by  any  thing 
 odd,  ridiculous,  and  frightful.  Some  of  them,  I  could  ob- 
 ferve,  were  much  more  fervent  and  devout  in  the  bufinefs 
 than  others,  and  feemed  to  chant,  peep,  and  mutter  with  a 
 great  degree  of  warmth  and  vigou*  as  if  determined  to  awaken 
 and  engage  the  powers  below.  I  fat  at  a  fmall  difl^nce,  not 
 more  than  thirty  feet  from  them,  (though  undifcovered),  witla 
 niy  Bibl:  in  my  hand,  refoiving,  if  pofTible,  to  fpoil  their  fporr, 
 
 and 
 
AMONG     THE    INDIANS.  355 
 
 and  prevent  their  receiving  any  anfwers  from  the  infernal 
 world,  and  there  viewed  the  whole  fcene.  They  continued 
 their  hideous  charms  and  incantations  for  more  than  three 
 hours,  until  they  had  all  wearied  themfelves  out,  although  they 
 had  in  that  fpaceof  time  taken  fundry  intervals  of  red;  and  at 
 length  broke  up,  1  apprehended,  without  receiving  any  anfwcr 
 at  all. 
 
 After  they  had  done  powwowing,  I  attempted  to  difcourfe 
 with  them  about  Chriftianity ;  but  they  foon  fcattered,  and 
 gave  me  no  opportunity  for  any  thing  of  that  nature.  A  view 
 of  thefe  things,  while  I  was  entirely  alone  in  the  wildernefs, 
 <leftitute  of  the  faciety  of  any  one  that  fo  much  as  "  named 
 **  the  name  of  Chrift,"  greatly  funk  my  fpirits,  gave  me  the 
 mofl  gloomy  turn  of  mind  imaginable,  almofl  dripped  me  of 
 all  relolution  and  hope  refpe(fl:ing  further  attempts  for  pro- 
 pagating the  gofpel,  and  converting  the  Pagans,  and  rendered 
 this  the  moft  burdenfome  and  difagreeable  Sabbath  that  ever  I 
 faw.  But  nothing,  I  can  truly  lay,  funk  and  diftreifed  me 
 like  the  lofs  of  my  hope  refpefting  their  converjion.  This 
 concern  appeared  fo  great,  and  feemed  to  be  fo  much  my  oivn, 
 that  1  feemed  to  have  nothing  to  do  on  earth,  if  this  failed : 
 and  a  profpeft  of  the  greateft  fuccefs  in  the  faving  converfion 
 of  fouls  under  gofpelMght,  would  have  done  little  or  nothing 
 towards  compenlating  for  the  lofs  of  my  hope  in  this  refpeft ; 
 and  my  fpirits  now  were  fo  damped  and  depreffed,  that  I  had 
 no  heart  nor  power  to  make  any  further  attempts  among  them 
 for  that  purpofe,  and  could  not  poflibly  recover  my  hope, 
 refolution,  and  courage,  by  the  utmoft  of  my  endeavours. 
 
 T'he  Indians  of  this  illand  can  many  of  them  underftand 
 the  Englilh  language  confiderably  well,  having  formerly  lived 
 in  fome  part  of  Maryland  among  or  near  the  white  people, 
 but  are  very  vicious^  drunken,  and  profane,  although  not 
 fofavageas  thofe  who  havelefs  acquaintance  with  the  Engli/h. 
 Their  cuftoms  in  divers  rcfpefls,  differ  from  thofe  of  other 
 Indians  upon  this  river.  They  do  not  bury  their  dead  in  a 
 common  form,  but  let  their  fle/h  confume  above  grosnd  in 
 clofe  cribs  made  for  that  purpofe  ;  and  at  the  end  of  a  year, 
 or  perhaps  fometimes  a  longer  fpace  of  time,  they  take  the 
 bones,  when   the  flefli  is  all  confumed,  and  wafh   and  fcrape 
 
 them,  and  afterwards  bury  them  with   fome  ceremony. 
 
 Their  method  of  charming  or  conjuring  over  the  fick,  feems 
 fomewhat  different  from  that  of  other  Indians,  though  for 
 fubflance  the  fame :  and  the  whole  of  it,  among  thefe  and  o- 
 thers,  perhaps  is  an  im/itation  of  what  feems,  by  Naaman's 
 expreffion,  2  Kings  v.  11.  to  have  been  the  cuftoni  of  the 
 
 y  y  2  ancient 
 
356     DIVINE    GRACE    DISPLAYED 
 
 ancient  Heathens.  For  it  feems  chiefly  to  confift  in  theiir 
 **  ftriking  their  hands  over  the  difeafed,"  repeatedly  ftroking 
 ©■  them,  "  and  calling  upon  their  gods,"  excepting  the  fpurt- 
 ing  oF  water  like  a  mift,  and  fome  other  frantic  ceremonies 
 common  to  the  other  conjurations,  I  have  already  mentioned. 
 When  I  was  in  thefe  parts  in  May  laft,  I  had  an  opportuni- 
 ty of  learning  many  of  the  notions  and  cuftomsof  the  Indians, 
 as  well  as  of  obfe rving  many  of  their  pra£tices :  I  then  travel- 
 ling more  than  an  hundred  and  thirty  miles  upon  the  river  a- 
 bc^ve  the  Englifli  fettlements ;  and  having  in  that  journey  a 
 view  of  lome  perfons  of /even  or  eight  diftinft  tribes,  fpeak- 
 ing  fo  many  different  languages.  But  of  all  the  fights  I  ever 
 faw  among  them,  or  indeed  any  where  elfe,  none  appeared  fo 
 frightful,  or  fo  near  a-kin  to  what  is  ufually  imagined  of /«- 
 fernal  prm)ers ;  none  ever  excited  fuch  images  of  terror  in 
 my  mind,  as  the  appearance  of  one  who  was  a  devout  and 
 zealous  reformer,  or  rather  reftorer  of  what  he  fuppofed  was 
 the  ancient  religion  of  the  Indians.  He  made  his  appearance 
 in  his  pont'ifcal gaTb,  which  was  a  coat  of  been s  Jkins,  drefTed 
 with  the  hair  on,  and  hanging  down  to  his  toes,  a  pair  of 
 be-tr-fkin  flockings,  and  a  great  ivooden  face,  painted  the  one 
 half  black,  and  the  other  tawny,  about  the  colour  of  an  In- 
 dian'j  flcin,  with  an  extravagant  mouth,  cut  very  much  awry  j 
 the  face  faftened  to  a  bear-fkin  cap,  which  was  drawn  over  his 
 head.  He  advanced  toward  me  with  the  inftrument  in  his 
 hand  that  he  ufed  for  mufic  in  his  idolatrous  luoijhip,  which 
 was  a  dry  tortorfe-fh'cll,  with  fome  corn  in  it,  and  the  neck  of 
 it  drawn  on  to  a  piece  of  wood,  which  made  a  very  conve^ 
 nient  handle.  As  he  came  forward,  he  beat  his  tune  with  the 
 rattle,  and  danced  with  all  his  might,  but  did  not  fuffer  any 
 part  of  his  body,  not  fo  much  as  his  fingers,  to  be  feen:  and 
 no  man  would  have  gut/Ted  by  his  appearance  and  aflions^ 
 that  he  could  have  been  a  human  creature,  if  they  had  not  had 
 fome  intimation  of  it  otherwife.  When  he  came  near  roe, 
 I  could  not  but  ihrink  av  ay  from  him,  although  it  was  then 
 noon'da)^,  and  I  knew  who  it  was,  his  appearance  and  geftures 
 were  fo  prodigioi  lly  frightful.  He  had  a  houfe  conlecrated 
 to  religious  ules,  wirh  divers  images  cut  out  upon  the  fevcral 
 parts  of  it;  I  v. ent  in  and  found  the  ground  beat  almoft  as 
 Y?.\A  as  a  rock  vith  their  frequent  dancing  in  it. —  I  difcourfed 
 with  him  about  Chrifliarity,  r,nd  feme  of  my  difcourfe  he 
 fef  med  to  like,  but  fc  me  oi  it  he  dilliked  entirely.  He  told 
 me  that  God  hi<d  tai  ght  him  his  religion,  and  that  he  never 
 would  turn  ficun  it,  but  wanted  to  find  fome  that  would 
 join  heartily  with  him  in  it ;  for  the  Indians,  he  faid,  were 
 
 growA 
 
AMONG    THE    INDIANS.  J5; 
 
 fJTown  very  degenerate  and  corrupt.  He  had  thoughts,  he 
 iaid,  of  leaving  all  his  friends,  and  travelling  abroad,  in  order 
 to  find  fome  that  would  join  with  him  ;  for  he  bfelieved  God 
 had  fame  good  people  fome  where  that  felt  as  he  did.  He 
 had  not  always,  he  faid,  felt  as  he  now  did,  but  had  fo?merly 
 been  like  the  reft  of  the  Indians,  until  about  four  or  five  years 
 before  that  time :  then,  he  faid,  his  heart  was  very  much 
 diftrefled,  fo  that  he  could  not  live  among  the  Indians,  but 
 got  away  into  the  woods,  and  lived  alone  for  fome  months. 
 At  length,  he  fays,  God  comforted  his  heart,  and  fliowed 
 him  what  he  fhould  do;  and  fmce  that  time  he  had  known 
 God,  and  tried   to   ferve    him;  and  loved  all   men,  be  they 
 
 who  they  would,  fo  as   he  never  did  before. He  treated 
 
 me  with  uncommon  courtefy,  and  feemed  to  be  hearty  in  it. 
 
 And  I  was  told  by  the   Indians,  that  he   oppofed  their 
 
 drinking  ftrong  liquor  with  all  his  power ;  and  if  at  any  time 
 he  could  not  diffuade  them  from  it,  by  all  he  could  fay,  he 
 ;would  leave  them,  and  go  crying  into  the  woods.  It  was 
 manifeft  he  had  a  fet  of  religious  notions  that  he  had  looked 
 into  for  himfclf,  and  not  taken  for  granted  upon  bare  tradi- 
 tion ;  and  he  reliflied  or  difreliflied  w  hatever  was  fpoken  of  a 
 religious  nature,  according  as  it  either  agreed  or  difagrted 
 with  his  Jlandard.  And  while  I  was  dilcourfmg  he  would 
 fometimes  fay,  "  Now  that  I  like :  fo  God  has  taught  me,** 
 ^c.  And  feme  of  his  fentiments  feemed  very  juft.  Yet  he 
 utterly  denied  the  being  of  a  devil,  and  declared  there  was 
 no  fil'ch  a  creature  known  among  the  Indians  of  old  times, 
 "whofe  religion  He  fuppofed  he  was  attempting  to  revive.  .He 
 likewife  told  me,  that  departed  fouls  all  went  fouthward,  and 
 that  the  difference  between  the  good  and  bad  was  this,  that 
 the  former  were  admitted  into  a  beautiful  town  with  fpir it uai 
 ■walls,  or  walls  agreeable  to  the  nature  of  fouls;  and  that  the 
 latter  would  for  ever  hover  round  thofe  walls,  an^  in  vain 
 attempt  to  get  in.  He  feemed  to  be  fmcere,  honefl,  and  con- 
 fclentious  in  his  own  -luay,  and  according  to  his  own  religious 
 notions,  which  was  more  than  I  ever  faw  in  any  other  Pagan  : 
 and  I  perceived  he  was  looked  upon,  and  derided  amongll:  mod 
 of  the  Indians  as  &  precije  zealot,  that  made  a  needlefs  noife 
 about  religious  matters.  But  I  muft  fay,  there  was  fomcthing 
 in  his  temper  and  difpofitioh  that  looked  more  like  true 
 religion  than  any  thing  I  ever  obferved  amongft  other  Hea- 
 thens. 
 
 But,  alas !  how  deplorable  is  the  ftate  of  the  Indians  upon 
 this  river  I  The  brief  reprefentation  I  have  here  given  of  their 
 actions  and  manners,  is  fufficient  to  fhew  that  they  are  "  led 
 
 a  captive 
 
358      DIVINE     GRACE    DISPLAYED 
 
 "  captive  by  Satan  at  his  will,"  in  the  moft  eminent  manner : 
 and,  methinks,  might  likewife  be  fufficient  to  excite  the  com- 
 paifion,  and  engage  the  prayers  of  pious  fouls  for  thcfe  their 
 fellow-men,  who  fit  in  "  the  regions  of  the  fhadow  of  death." 
 September  22.  Made  fome  further  attempts  to  inftruft  and 
 chriftianize  the  Indians  on  this  ifland,  but  all  to  no  purpofe. 
 They  live  fo  near  the  white  people,  that  they  are  always  in 
 the  way  of  ftrong  liquor,  as  well  as  the  ill  examples  of  «om/- 
 nal  Chriftians;  which  renders  it  fo  unfpeakably  difficult  to 
 ireat  with  them  about  Chriftianity. 
 
 Forks  of  Delaware,  1 745. 
 
 Oftober  i.  Difcourfed  to  the  Indians  here,  and  (pent  fome 
 time  in  private  conferences  with  them  about  their  fouls  con- 
 cerns, and  afterwards  invited  them  to  accompany,  or  if  not, 
 to  follow  me  down  to  Crofweekfung  as  foon  as  their  conve- 
 yiiency  would  admit  j  which  invitation  fundry  of  them  cheer- 
 fully accepted. 
 
 Crofweekfung  in  New-Jerfey,  1745. 
 
 Preached  to  my  people  from  John  xiv.  i. — 6,  The  divine 
 prefence  feemed  to  be  in  the  afTembly.  Numbers  were  affeft- 
 cd  with  divine  truths,  and  it  was  a  feafon  of  comfort  to  fome 
 in  particular. 
 
 O  what  a  difference  is  there  between  thefe  and  the  In- 
 dians I  had  lately  treated  with  upon  Sufquahannah !  To  be 
 ■with  thofe  feemed  like  being  baniihed  from  God,  and  all  his 
 people ;  to  be  with  thefe  like  being  admitted  into  his  family, 
 and  to  the  enjoyment  of  his  divine  prefence !  How  great  is 
 the  change  lately  made  upon  numbers  of  thefe  Indians,  who 
 not  many  months  ago  were  many  of  them  as  thoughtlefs, 
 and  averfe  to  Chriftianity,  as  thole  upon  Sufquahannah !  and 
 how  aftonifhing  is  that  grace  that  has  made  this  change! 
 
 Lord's  day,  Odtober  6.  Preached  in  the  forenoon  from 
 John  X.  7. —  II.  There  was  a  confiderable  melting  among  my 
 people;  the  dear  young  Chriftians  were  refreftied,  comforted, 
 and  ftrengthened,  and  one  or  two  perfons  newly  awakened. 
 
 In  the  afternoon  I  difcourfed  on  the  ftory  of  the  jailor, 
 Afts  xvi.  and  in  the  evening  expounded  Afts  xx.  i. — 12. 
 There  was  at  this  time  a  very  agreeable  melting  fpread 
 through  the  whole  aftTembly.     I  think  I  fcarce  ever  law  a 
 
 more 
 
AMONG     THE    INDIANS.  359 
 
 Irtore  defirable  afFeftion  in  any  number  of  people  in  my  Tife. 
 There  was  fcarcc  a  dry  eye  to  be  feen  among  them,  and  yet 
 nothing  boi/ferous  or  unfeemly,  nothing  that  tended  to  difturb 
 the  pubUc  worfhip ;  but  rather  to  encourage  and  excite  a. 
 Chriftian  ardour  and  fpirit  of  devotion. 
 
 Tnofe  who,  I  have  reafon  to  hope,  were  favingly  renewed, 
 were  firfl:  atfe6ted,  and  feemed  to  rejoice  much,  but  with 
 brokertaefs  of  fpirit  and  godly  fear  ;  tb^ir  exercifes  were  much 
 the  fame  with  thofe  mentioned  in  my  Journal  of  Auguft  26. 
 evidently  appearing  to  be  the  genuine  elfe£l  of  a  Spirit  of  a- 
 doption. 
 
 After  public  fervice  was  over  I  withdrew,  (being  much 
 tired  with  the  labours  of  the  day),  and  the  Indians  continued 
 praying  among  themfelves  for  near  two  hours  together  ;  which 
 continued  exercifes  appeared  to  be  attended  with  a  blefled 
 quickening  influence  from  on  high. 
 
 I  could  not  but  earneflly  -wi/h  that  numbers  of  God's  people 
 had  been  prefent  at  this  feafon,  to  fee  and  hear  thefe  things 
 which  I  am  fure  muft  refrefh  the  heart  of  every  true  lover  of 
 Zion's  intereft.  To  fee  thofe,  who  very  lately  were  favage 
 Pagans  and  idolaters,  "having  no  hope,  and  without  God  in 
 **  the  world,"  now  filled  with  a  fenfe  of  divine  love  and  grace, 
 and  worfhipping  the  "  Father  in  fpirit  and  in  truth,"  as  num- 
 bers here  appeared  to  do,  was  not  a  little  affeding  ;  and  efpe- 
 cially  to  fee  them  appear  fo  tender  and  humble,  as  well  as  live- 
 ly, fervent,  and  devout  in  the  divine  fervice. 
 
 October  24.  Difcourfed  from  John  iv.  13. — 14.  There 
 was  a  great  attention,  a  defirable  affeftion,  and  an  unafFefled 
 melting  in  the  affembly. — It  is  furprifmg  to  fee  how  eager 
 they  are  of  hearing  the  word  of  God.  I  have  oftentimes 
 thought  they  would  cheerfully  and  diligently  attend  divine 
 worfhip  twenty-four  hours  together,  had  they  an  opportunity 
 fo  to  do. 
 
 Oftober  25.  Difcourfed  to  my  people  refpe(5Ving  the  refur- 
 reSilon,  from  Luke  xx.  27. — 36.  And  when  I  came  to  men- 
 tion the  blelTednefs  the  godly  fhall  enjoy  at  that  feafon ;  their 
 final  freedom  from  death,  fm,  and  forrow  ;  their  equality  to 
 the  angels  in  regard  of  their  nearnefs  to,  and  enjoyment  of 
 Chrift,  (Ibme  imperfefl  degree  of  which  they  are  favoured 
 with  in  the  prefent  life,  from  whence  fprings  their  fweett  ft 
 comfort) ;  and  their  being  the  children  of  'Cod,  openly  ac- 
 knowledged by  him  as  Juch:  I  fay,  when  I  mentioned  thef« 
 things,  numbers  of  them  were  much  affected,  and  melted 
 with  a  view  of  this  blefled  ftare. 
 
 OOober  26.  Being  called  to  afTift  in  the  adiriniftration  of 
 
36o      DIVINE     GRACE    DISPLAYED 
 
 the  Lord's  fupper,  in  a  neighbouring  congregation,  I  invited 
 my  people  to  go  vvith  me,  who  in  general  embraced  the  op- 
 portUiiity  cheerfully,  and  attended  the  feveral  difcourfes  of 
 that  fole-niiity  witn  diligence  and  afFe(ftion,  moft  of  them  now 
 underftinding  fomething  of  the  EngliQi  language. 
 
 Lord's  day,  Ovftober  27.  While  I  was  preaching  to  a  vafl 
 aflembly  of  people  abroad,  who  appeared  generally  eafy  and 
 fecure  enough,  there  was  one  Indian  woman,  a  ftranger,  who 
 never  heard  me  preach  before,  nor  ever  regarded  any  thing 
 about  religion,  (being  now  pcrfuaded  by  fome  of  her  friends 
 to  cj  ne  to  meeting,  though  much  againft  her  will),  was  fei- 
 zed  vrith  preffing  oncern  for  her  foul,  and  foon  after  cxprefP 
 cd  a  great  delire  of  going  home,  (more  than  forty  miles  di- 
 ftant),  to  call  her  hulband,  that  he  alfo  might  be  awakened  to 
 a  concern  for  his  foul.  Some  other  of  the  Indians  alfo  appear- 
 ed to  be  affefted  with  divine  truths  this  day. 
 
 The  pious  people  of  the  EngliOi  (numbers  of  whom  I  had 
 opportunity  to  converfe  with)  feemed  refrefhed  with  feeing 
 the  Indians  worfhip  God  in  that  devout  and  fjlemn  manner 
 with  the  affembly  of  his  people :  and  with  tljofe  mentioned 
 A6ls  xi.  18.  they  could  not  but  "glorify  God,  faying.  Then 
 *'  hath  God  alfo  to  the  Gentiles  granted  repentance  unto 
 «  life." 
 
 Oftober  28.  Preached  again  to  a  great  affembly,  at  which 
 time  fome  of  my  people  appeared  affe(5led  ;  and  when  public 
 "WorOiip  was  over,  weie  inquifitive  whether  there  would  not 
 be  another  fermon  in  the  evening,  or  before  the  facramental 
 folemnity  was  concluded ;  being  fiill  defirous  to  hear  God's 
 word. 
 
 Crofweekfung, 
 
 06lober  28.  Difcourfed  from  Matth.  xxii.  i. — 13.  I  was 
 enabled  to  open  the  fcrlpture,  and  adapt  my  difcourfe  and 
 exprellions  to  the  capacities  of  my  people,  "  I  know  not 
 "  how,"  in  a  plain,  eafy,  and  familiar  manner,  beyond  all 
 that  I  could  have  done  by  the  utmoft  fludy :  and  this,  with- 
 out any  fpecial  difficulty,  with  as  much  freedom  as  if  I  had 
 been  addreffing  a  common  audience,  who  had  been  inflrufted 
 in  the  doflrine  of  Chriftianity  all  their  days. 
 
 The  word  of  God  at  this  time  feemed  to  fall  upon  the  af- 
 fembly with  a  divine  power  and  influence,  efpecially  toward 
 the  clofe  of  my  difcourfe :  there  was  both  a  fweet  melting 
 and  bitter  mourning  in  the  audience. — The  dear  Chriftians 
 were  refreflied  and  comforted, — cunvi6lions  revived  in  others, 
 and  fundry  perfons  newly  awakened  who  had  never  been  with 
 «s  before ;  and  fo  much  of  the  divine  prefcnce  appeared  in  the 
 
 affembly; 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  361 
 
 aflTembly,  that  it  feemed,  "  this  was  no  other  than  the  houfe 
 **  of  God,  and  the  gate  of  heaven."  And  all  that  had  any 
 favour  and  reli/h  of  divine  things  were  even  conrtrained  by 
 the  fweetnefs  of  that  feafon  to  fay,  "  Lord,  it  is  good  for  us 
 *'  to  be  here!''  If  ever  there  was  amongft  my  people  an  ap- 
 pearance of  the  New  Jerufalem "  as  a  bride   adorned  for 
 
 "  her  hufband,"  there  was  much  of  it  at  this  time ;  and  fo 
 agreeable  was  the  entertainiVient  where  fuch  tokens  of  the  di- 
 vine prefence  were,  that  J  could  fcarce  be  willing  in  the  .even- 
 ing to  leave  the  place,  and  repair  to  my  lodgings.  I  was  re- 
 freihed  with  a  view  of  the  continuance  of  this  bleffed  work 
 of  grace  among  them,  and  its  influence  upon  grangers  of  tne 
 Indians  that  had  of  late,  from  time  to  time,  providentially 
 fallen  into  thefe  parts. 
 
 November  i.  Difcourfed  from  Luke  xxiv.  briefly  explain-^ 
 ing  the  whole  chapter,  said  infifting  efpcciaily  upon  fome  par- 
 ticular pafTages. 
 
 The  difcourfe  was  attended  with  fomc  afFcdlionate  concern 
 upon  fome  of  the  hearers,  though  not  equal  to  what  has  of- 
 ten appeared  among  them. 
 
 Lord's  day,  November  3.  Preached  to  my  people  from 
 Luke  xvi.  17.  more  efpecially  for  the  fake  of  feveial  lately 
 brought  under  deep  concern  for  their  fouls.  There  was  Ibme 
 apparent  concern  and  affeiftion  in  the  aflembly,  though  lar 
 lefs  than  has  been  ufual  of  late. 
 
 Afterwards  1  baptized  fourteen  pciCons  of  the  Indian?,  fix 
 adults  and  eight  children :  one  of  thefe  was  near  fonrfcore 
 years  of  age,  and  I  have  reafon  to  hope  God  hai  brought  her 
 favingly  home  to  himfelf :  two  of  the  others  were  men  of 
 jjfty  years  old,  who  had  been  fmgukr  and  remarkable,  even 
 among  the  Indians,  for  their  wickednefs ;  one  of  ibem  had 
 been  a  murderer,  and  both  notorious  drunkards,  as  wtU  as  ex- 
 ceflive  quarreliome;  but  now  I  cannot  but  hope  both  are  be- 
 come fubjc<5ls  of  God's  fpeclal  grace,  elpecialiy  the  worft  of 
 them  *.  J  deferred  their  bupiifm  for  many  weeks  after  they 
 bad  given  evidences  n't  having  pafled  a  grent  change,  that  f 
 might  have  more  opportunities  to  obf.rvc  the  fruits  of  thofe 
 impreffions  they  h:4d  been  under,  and  apprehended  the  way 
 was  now  clear:  and  there  was  not  one  of  the  adults  I  bapti- 
 zed, but  what  had  given  me'  fome  cornJbrtablc  grounds  to 
 I;opc,  that  God  had  wrought  a  work  of  fpccial  grace  in  their 
 
 *  The  man  particularly  mentioned  in  my  Journal  of  Augufl  lotli, 
 iss  being  then  ;jTakencd. 
 
 Z  z  heaiis : 
 
362     DIVINE     GRACE    DISPLAYED 
 
 hearts ;  although  I  could  not  have  the  fame  degree  of  fatif- 
 fadion  refpefling  one  or  two  of  them,  as  the  reft. 
 
 November  4.   Difcourfed  from  John  xi.  briefly  explaining 
 
 moft  of  the  chapter. Divine  truths  made  deep  impreflions 
 
 upon  many  in  the  afTembly  ;  numbers  were  affeded  with  a 
 view  of  the  power  of  Chrift,  manifefted  in  his  raifing  the 
 dead;  and  efpecially  when  this  inftance  of  his  power  was.  im- 
 proved to  fhew  his  power  and  ability  to  raife  dead  fouls  (fuch 
 as  many  of  them  then  felt  themfelves  to  be)  to  a  fpiritual 
 life ;  as  alfo  to  raife  the  dead  at  the  laft  day,  and  difpenfe  to 
 them  due   rewards  andpunifhments. 
 
 There  were  fundry  of  the  perfons  lately  come  here  from 
 remote  places,  that  were  now  brought  under  deep  and  prefP 
 ing  concern  for  their  fouls,  particularly  one,  who  not  long 
 fmce  came  half  drunk,  and  railed  on  us,  and  attempted  by  all 
 means  to  difturb  us  while  engaged  in  the  divine  worfhip,  was 
 now  fo  concerned  and  diftrefled  for  her  foul,  that  ftie  feemed 
 unable  to  get  any  eafe  without  an  intereft  in  Chrift.  There 
 were  many  tears  and  atFe£lionate  fobs  and  groans  in  the  aflem- 
 bly  in  general,  fome  weeping  for  themfelves,  others  for  their 
 friends.  And  although  perfons  are  doubtlefs  much  eafier  af- 
 fefted  now,  than  they  were  in  the  beginning  of  this  religious 
 concern,  when  tears  and  cries  for  their  fouls  were  things  un- 
 heard of  among  them  ;  yet  I  muft  fay,  their  afFeflion  in  gene- 
 ral appeared  genuine  and  unfeigned ;  and  efpecially  this  ap- 
 peared very  confpicuous  in  thofe  newly  awakened.  So  that 
 true  and  genuine  conviftions  of  lin,  feem  ftill  to  be  begua 
 and  promoted  in  many  inltances. 
 
 Baptized  a  child  this  day,  and  perceived  fundry  of  the  bap- 
 tized perfons  afFefted  with  the  adminiftration  of  this  ordi- 
 nance, as  being  thereby  minded  of  their  own  folemn  engage- 
 ments. 
 
 I  have  now  baptized  in  all  forty-feven  perfons  of  the  'In- 
 dians, twenty-three  aduks,  and  twenty-four  children ;  thirty- 
 live  of  them  belonging  to  thefc  parts,  and  the-  reft  to  the 
 Forks  of  Delaware:  and  (through  rich  grace)  they  have 
 none  of  them  as  yet  been  left  to  difgrace  their  profeiTion  of 
 Chriftianity  by  any  fcandalcris  or  unbecoming  behaviour. 
 
 I  might  now  juftl)^  mi^ke  many  remarks  on  a  work  of  grace 
 fo  very  remarkable  as  this  has  been  in  divers  refpefts;  but 
 ftnall  confine  myfelf  to  a  few  general  hints  only. 
 
 iftf  It  is  remarkable  that  God  began  this  work  among  the 
 Indians  at  a  time  when  I  had  the  leaft  hope,  and  (to  my  ap- 
 prehenfion)  the  Icail  rational  profpeft  of  feeing   a  work  of 
 
 grace 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  363 
 
 grace  propagated  amongft  them.  My  bodily  flrength  being 
 then  much  wafted  by  a  late  tedious  journey  to  Sufquahannah, 
 where  I  was  neceffarily  expofed  to  hardfhips  and  fatigues  a- 
 mong  the  Indians:  my  mind  being  alio  exceedingly  deprelTed 
 with  a  view  of  the  unfuccefsfulnefs  of  my  labours,  (llnce  I 
 had  little  reafon  fo  much  as  to  hope  that  God  had  made  me 
 inftrumental  of  the  faving  converfion  of  any  of  the  Indians, 
 except  my  interpreter  and  his  wife) ;  whence  I  was  ready  to 
 look  upon  myfelfas  a  burden  to  the  Honourable  Society, 
 that  employed  and  fupported  me  in  this  bulinefs,  and  began 
 to  entertain  ferious  thoughts  of  giving  up  my  mij/ion ;  and 
 aimoft  refolved  I  would  do  fo,  at  the  conclufion  of  the  pre- 
 lent  year,  if  I  had  then  no  better  profpecft  of  fpecial  fuccefs  in 
 my  work  than  I  had  hitherto  had :  although  I  cannot  fay  I 
 entertained  thefe  thoughts  becaufe  I  v/as  weary  of  the  labours 
 and  fatigues  that  nece/Tarily  attended  my  prefentbufmefs,  or  be- 
 caufe I  had  light  and  freedom  in  my  own  mind  to  turn  any 
 other  way ;  but  purely  through  dejedion  of  fpirit,  preiTuig 
 difcouragement,  and  an  apprehenfion  of  its  being  unjuft  to 
 fpend  money  confecrated  to  religious  ufes,  only  to  civilize 
 the  Indians,  and  bring  them  to  an  external  profeffion  of 
 Chriftianity,  which  was  all  that  I  could  then  fee  any  profpcft 
 of  having  effedled,  while  God  feemed  (as  I  thought)  evident- 
 ly to  frown  upon  the  defign  of  their  faving  converfion,  by 
 with-holding  the  convincing  and  renewing  influences  of  his 
 bleffed  Spirit  from  attending  the  means  I  had  hitherto  ufed 
 with  them  for  that  end. 
 
 And  in  this  frame  of  mind  I  firft  vifited  thefe  Indians  at 
 Crofweekfung,  apprehending  it  was  my  indifpenlible  duty 
 (feeing  I  had  heard  there  was  a  number  in  thefe  parts)  to 
 make  fome  attempts  for  their  converfion  to  God,  though  I 
 cannot  fay,  I  had  any  hope  of  fuccefs,  my  fpirits  were  now 
 fo  extremely  funk.  And  I  do  not  know  that  my  hopes  re- 
 fpedling  the  converfion  of  the  Indians  were  ever  reduced  to 
 fo  low  an  ebb,  fince  I  had  any  fpecial  concern  for  them,  as 
 at  this  time. 
 
 And  yet  this  was  the  very  feafon  that  God  faw  fitteft  to 
 begin  this  glorious  work  in!  And  thus  he  "  ordained  ftrength 
 *'  out  of  weaknefs,"  by  making  bare  his  almighty  arni  at  a 
 time  when  all  hopes  and  human  probabilities   moft   evidently 
 
 appeared  to  fail. "  Whence  I   learn,  that  it  is  good   to 
 
 "  follow  the  path  of  duty,  though  in  the  midft  of  darknefs 
 "  and  difcouragement." 
 
 idly,  It  is  remarkable  how  God  providentially,  snd  in  a 
 manner  aimoft  nr.acc '.citable,  called  thefe  Indians  together  to 
 
 Z  z  2  be 
 
364      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 be  inftriifted  in  the  great  things  that  concerned  their  fouls  j 
 and  how  he  feized  their  minds  with  the  moft  folemn  and 
 wei'Thty  concern  for  their  eternal  falvation  as  faft  as  they 
 C;i  ne  to  the  place  where  his  word  was  preached.  When  I 
 firii  came  into  thefe  parts  in  June,  I  found  not  one  man  at 
 the  place  I  vifited,  but  orAy  four  women  and  a  few  children: 
 but  before  I  had  been  here  many  days,  they  gathered  from  all 
 quarters,  fome  from  more  than  twenty  miles  diftant;  and 
 when  I  made  them  a  fecond  vifit  in  the  beginning  of  Auguft, 
 fome  came  more  than  forty  miles  to  hear  me. 
 
 And  m.any  came  without  any  intelligence  of  what  was  going 
 on  here,  and  confequently  without  any  defign  of  theirs y  fo 
 much  as  to  gratify  their  curiofity  ;  fo  that  it  feemed  as  if  Go4 
 had  fumraoncd  them  toj>ether  from  all  quarters  for  nothing 
 clfe  but  to  deliver  his  meflage  to  them ;  and  that  he  did  this, 
 (with  regard  to  fom.e  of  themj,  without  making  ufe  of  any 
 buyncm  means ;  although  there  was  pains  taken  by  fome  of 
 them  to  give  notice  to  others  at  remote  places. 
 
 Nor  is  it  lefs  furprifing  that  they  were  one  after  another 
 afFeded  with  a  folemn  concern  for  their  fouls,  almoft  as  foon 
 as  they  came  upon  the  fpot  where  divine  truths  were  taught 
 thera.  I  could  not  but  think  often  that  their  coming  to  the 
 place  of  our  public  worfliip,  was  like  Saul  and  his  mefTengers 
 coming  among  the  prophets;  they  no  fooner  came  but  they 
 propheficd;  and  thefe  were  almoft  as  foon  aflTefted  with  a 
 fenle  of  their  fin  and  mifery,  and  with  an  earneft  concern  for 
 deliverance,  as  they  made  their  appearance  in  our  aflembly. 
 — After  this  work  of  ^r/?cf  began  with  power  among  them, 
 it  was  common  for  jh  angers  of  the  Indians,  before  they  hiid 
 been  with  us  one  day,  to  be  much  aM'akened,  deeply  convin- 
 ced of  their  fin  and  mifery,  and  to  inquire  with  great  folicitude, 
 "  What  they  Should  do  to  be  faved?" 
 
 2,dly,  It  is  like  wife  remarkable  how  God  prcferved  thefe 
 poor  ignorant  Indians  from  being  prejudifed  againft  me,  and 
 the  truths  I  taught  them,  by  thofe  means  that  were  ufed  with 
 them  for  that  purpofe  bj  ungodly  people.  There  were  many 
 atterrpts  made  by  feme  ill-minded  perfons  of  the  white  people 
 ta  prtjndife  thein  a:Ta!nrr,  or  flight  them  from  Chriftianity. 
 1  hf  y  fometimes  told  them,  the  Indians  were  well  enough 
 on  it  already  : — that  there  was  no  need  of  all  this  noife  about 
 rhridinnity  : — that  if  they  were  Cbrifiians,  they  would  be 
 in  no  better,  no  fafer,  or  happier  ftate,  than  they  were  al- 
 ready in,  i^c. 
 
 Sometimes  they  to'd  them,  that  I  was  a  Inave,  a  deceiver, 
 n\A  the  like  :  that  I  daiiy  taught  them  a  company  of  lies,  and 
 Jiad  no  otbtr  defign  but  to  impofe  upon  them,  6c. 
 
 And 
 
AMONG     THE    INDIANS.  365 
 
 And  when  none  of  thefc,  and  fuch  like  fuggeftions,  would 
 avail  to  their  purpofe,  they  then  tried  another  expedient,  and 
 told  the  Indians,  "  My  delign  was  to  gather  together  as  large 
 *'  a  body  of  them  as  I  poflibiy  could,  and  then  fell  them  to 
 "  England  for  flaves."  Than  which  nothing  could  be  more 
 likely  to  terrify  the  Indians,  they  being  naturally  of  a  jealous 
 difpofition,  and  the  moft  averfe  to  a  flate  of  fervitude  perhaps 
 of  any  people  living. 
 
 But  all  thefe  wicked  infinuations  (through  divine  goodn«fs 
 over-ruling)  conftantly  turned  againft  the  authors  of  them,  and 
 only  ferved  to  engage  the  aifeftions  of  the  Indians  more  firm- 
 ly to  me :  for  they  being  awakened  to  a  folemn  concern  for 
 their  fouls,  could  not  but  obferve,  that  the  perfons  who  en- 
 deavoured to  imbitter  their  minds  againft  me,  were  altogether 
 unconcerned  about  their  own  fouls,  and  not  only  fo,  but  vi- 
 cious and  profane ;  and  thence  could  not  but  argue,  that  if 
 they  hai  no  concern  for  their  oivn,  it  was  not  likely  they 
 ihould  have  for  the  fouls  of  others. 
 
 It  feems  yet  the  more  wonderful  that  the  Indians  were  pre- 
 served from  once  hearkening  to  thefe  fuggeftions,  in  as  much 
 as  I  was  an  utter  ftranger  among  them,  and  could  give  them 
 no  alTurance  of  my  fincere  afFe£lion  to,  and  concern  for  them, 
 by  any  thing  that  was  paft, — while  the  perfons  that  infinuated 
 tliefe  things  were  their  old  acquaintance,  who  had  had  fre- 
 quent opportunites  of  gratifying  their  thir/}y  appetites  with 
 itrong  drmk,  and  confequently,  doubtlefs,  had  the  greateft 
 
 intercft  in  their  affections. But  fiom  this  inftancc  of  their 
 
 prefervation  from  fatal  prejudices,  I  have  had  occafion  with 
 adiniiation  to  fay,  "  If  God  will  work,  who  can  hinder  or 
 <'  refift?" 
 
 /^thlyy  Nor  is  it  lefs  wonderful  how  God  was  pleafed  to  pro- 
 vide a  remedy  for  my  want  of  fkill  and  freedom  in  the  In- 
 dian language,  by  remarkably  fitting  my  interpreter  for,  and 
 affifting  him  in  the  performance  of  his  work.  It  might  rea- 
 fonably  be  fuppofed  I  muft  needs  labour  under  a  vaft  difad- 
 vantage  in  addrefTmg  the  Indians  by  an  interpreter;  and  that 
 divine  truths  would  unavoidably  loofe  much  of  the  energy 
 and  pathos  with  which  they  might  at  firft  be  delivered,  by  rea- 
 fon  of  their  coming  to  the  audience  from  s^fecond  hand.  But 
 although  this  has  ofren  (to  my  forrow  and  difcouragement) 
 been  the  cafe  in  times  paft,  when  my  interpreter  had  little 
 or  no  fenfe  of  divine  things,  yet  now  it  was  quite  otherwife. 
 I  cannot  think  my  addre/Tes  to  the  Indians  ordinarily  fince 
 the  beginning  of  this  feafon  of  grace,  have  loft  any  thing  of 
 the  povk-er  or  pungency  with  which  they  were  made,  i.niefs 
 
 it 
 
366     DIVINE    GRACE    DISPLAYED 
 
 It  were  fometimcs  for  want  of  pertinent  and  pathetic  terms 
 and  expreffions  in  the  Indian  language  ;  which  difficulty 
 could  not  have  been  much  redreflcd  by  my  perfonal  acquaint- 
 ance with  their  language.  My  interpreter  had  before  gained 
 fome  good  degree  of  doilrlnal  knowledge,  whereby  he  was 
 rendered  capable  ©f  underftanding  and  communicating,  with- 
 out miftakes,  the  intent  and  meaning  of  my  difcourfes,  and 
 that  without  being  confined y?r/^/y,  and  obliged  to  interpret 
 %'erbatim.  He  had  likewife,  to  appearance,  an  experimental 
 acquaintance  with  divine  things  ;  and  it  pleafed  God  at  this 
 feafon  to  infpire  his  mind  with  longing  defires  for  the  con- 
 verfion  of  the  Indians,  and  to  give  him  admirable  zeal  and 
 fervency  in  addreffing  them  in  order  thereto.  And  it  is  re- 
 markable, that  when  I  was  favoured  with  any  fpecial  ajjlftance 
 an  any  work,  and  enabled  to  fpeak  with  more  than  common 
 freedom^  fervency,  and  power,  under  a  lively  and  affecting 
 y^w/^  of  divine  things,  he  was  ufually  affected  in  the  fame 
 manner  almoft  inftantly,  and  feemed  at  once  quickened  and 
 enabled  to  fpeak  in  the  fame  pathetic  language,  and  under  the 
 fame  influence  that  I  did.  And  afurprijing  energy  often  ac- 
 companied the  word  at  fuch  feafons;  fo  that  the  face  of  the 
 whole  aflembly  would  be  apparently  changed  almoft  in  an  in- 
 flant,  and  tears  and  fobs  became  common  among  them. 
 
 He  alfo  appeared  to  have  fuch  a  clear  doftrinal  view  of 
 God's  ufual  methods  of  dealing  with  fouls  under  a  preparatory 
 work  of  convi^ion  and  humiliation  as  he  never  had  before ; 
 fo  that  I  could,  with  his  help,  difcourfe  freely  with  the  di- 
 ftreffed  perfons  about  their  internal  exercifes,  their  fears,  dif- 
 couragements,  temptations,  <bc. 
 
 He  likewife  took  pains  day  and  night  to  repeat  and  incul- 
 cate upon  the  minds  of  the  Indians  the  truths  I  taught  them 
 daily  ;  and  this  he  appeared  to  do,  not  from  fpi ritual  pride,  and 
 -an  affectation  of  fetting  himfelf  up  as  a  public  teacher,  but 
 from  a  fpirit  of  faithfulnefs,  and  an  honeft  concern  for  their 
 fouls. 
 
 His  convcrfation  among  the  Indians  has  likewife  (fo  far  as 
 1  know)  been  favoury,  as  becomes  a  Chriftian,  and  a  perfon 
 employed  in  his  work ;  and  I  may  juAIy  fay,  he  has  been  a 
 great  comfort  to  me,  and  a  great  inftrument  of  promoting 
 this  good  work  among  the  Indians :  fo  that  whatever  be  the 
 fiate  of  his  own  foul,  it  is  apparent  God  has  remarkably  fitted 
 him  for  this  work. 
 
 i\nd  thus  God  has  mani fefted  that,  without  bellowing  on 
 
 me  the  gift  Oi  tongues,  he  could  find  a  way  wherein  I  might 
 
 ^  ^  .  be 
 
AMONG    THE     INDIANS.  367 
 
 Be  as  efFcftually  enabled  to  convey  the  truths  of  his  glorious 
 gofpel  to  the  minds  of  thefe  poor  benighted  Pagans. 
 
 Sthly,  It  is  further  remarkable,  that  God  has  carried  on  his 
 work  here  by  fuch  means,  and  in  fuch  a  manner  as  tended  to 
 obviate,  and  leave  no  room  for  thofe  prejudices  and  obje^ions 
 that  have  often  been  raifed  againft  fuch  a  work.  When  per- 
 fons  have  been  awakened  to  a  folemn  coacern  for  their  fouls, 
 by  hearing  the  more  aivfid  truths  of  God's  word,  and  the  ter- 
 rors of  the  divine  law  infifted  upon,  it  has  ufually  in  fuch  cafes 
 been  objected  by  fome,  that  fuch  perfons  were  only  frighted 
 with  a  fea'ful  mife  of  hell  and  damnation;  and  that  there 
 was  no  evidence  that  their  concern  was  the  efFefl  of  a  divine 
 influence.  But  God  has  left  no  room  for  this  objeftion  in 
 the  prefent  cafe,  this  work  of  grace  having  been  begun  and 
 carried  on,  by  almoft  one  continued  ftrain  of  gofpel-invita- 
 tion  to  perifhing  finners,  as  may  reafonably  be  guefled,  from 
 a  view  of  the  pajjages  of  fcripture  I  chiefly  infifted  upon  in 
 my  difcourfes  from  time  to  time  ;  which  I  have  for  that  pur- 
 pofe  inferted  in  my  Journal. 
 
 Nor  have  I  ever  feen  fo  general  an  awakening  in  any  af- 
 fembly  in  my  life  as  appeared  here,  while  I  was  opening  and 
 infilling  upon  the  parable  of  the  ^ri?^/ T^/'/'^r,  Luke  xiv.  In 
 which  difcourfe  I  was  enabled  to  fet  before  my  hearers  the 
 unfearchaUe  riches  of  gofpel-grace. 
 
 Not  that  I  would  be  underftood  here,  that  I  never  inflruft- 
 ed  the  Indians  refpefting  their  fallen  ftate,  and  the  fmfulnefs 
 and  mifery  of  it :  for  this  was  what  I  at  firft  chiefly  infifted 
 upon  with  them,  and  endeavoured  to  repeat  and  inculcate  in 
 almoft  every  difcourfe,  knowing  that  without  this  foundation 
 I  Ihould  but  build  upon  the  fand;  and  that  it  would  be  in  vain 
 to  invite  them  to  Chrift,  unlefs  I  could  convince  them  of  their 
 need  of  him,  Mark  ii.  17. 
 
 But  ftill  this  great  awakening,  this  fnrprifing  concern  was 
 never  excited  by  any  harangues  of  terror,  but  always  appear- 
 ed moft  remarkable  when  I  infifted  upon  *'  the  compoiitions 
 *'  of  a  dying  Saviour,"  the  '^plentiful  provifioiis  of  the  go- 
 "  fpel,"  and  the  "  free  offers  of  divine  grace  to  needy  diftrefl^ 
 ^  ed  finners." 
 
 Nor  would  I  be  underftood  to  infinuate,  that  fuch  a  reli- 
 gious concern  might  juftly  be  fufpe«51:ed  as  not  being  genuine, 
 and  from  a  divine  influence,  becaufe  produced  by  the  preach- 
 ing of  terror:  for  this  is  perhaps  God's  more  ufual  way  of  a- 
 wakening  finners,  and  appears  entirely  agreeable  to  fcripture, 
 and  found  reafon. — But  what  I  meant  here  to  obferve  is,  that 
 God  faw  fit  to  improve  and  blefs  milder  means  for  the  effec- 
 tual 
 
3^8      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 tual  awakening  of  thefe  Indians,  and  thereby  obviated  the 
 fjrementioned  objeftion,  which  the  world  might  otherwifc 
 have  had  a  move  plaujible  colour  of  making. 
 
 And  as  there  has  been  no  room  for  any  plaufible  obje£lion 
 againft  this  work,  in  regard  of  the  means ;  fo  neither  in  re- 
 gard of  the  7nannef  in  which  it  has  been  carried  on. It  is 
 
 true,  perfons  concern  for  their  fouls  has  been  exceeding  great, 
 the  conviflions  of  their  fin  and  mifery  have  rifen  to  a  high 
 degree,  and  produced  many  tears,  cries,  and  groans :  but  then 
 they  have  not  been  attended  with  thofe  diforders,  either  bo- 
 dily or  mental,  that  have  fometimes  prevailed  among  perfons 
 under  religious  impreflions. There  has  here  been  no  ap- 
 pearance of  thofe  "  convulfions,  bodily  agonies,  frightful 
 "  fcreamings,  fwoonings,"  and  the  like,  that  have  been  fa 
 much  complained  of  in  fome  places  ;  although  there  have 
 been  fome  who  (with  the  jailor)  have  been  made  to  tremhlc 
 
 under  a  fenfe  of  their  fin  and  mifery, numbers  who  have 
 
 been  made  to  cry  out  from  a  diftre/fing  view  of  their  peiifhing 
 
 ftate, and  fome  that  have  been,  for  a  time,  in  a  great  mea- 
 
 fure,  deprived  of  their  bodily  ftrength,  yet  without  any  fuch 
 eonvuljlye  appearances. 
 
 Nor  has  there  been  any  appearance  of  wd-wf a/ diforders  here, 
 jfuch  as  "  vifions,  trances,  imaginations  of  being  under  pro- 
 "  phetic  infpiration,"  and  the  like ;  or  fcarce  any  unbeco- 
 ming difpofition  to  appear  remarkably  alfefted  either  with 
 concern  or  joy ;  though  I  mud  confefs,  I  obferved  one 
 or  two  perfons,  whofe  concern,  I  thought,  was  in  a  confi- 
 derable  meafure  affected;  and  one  whofe  joy  appeared  to  be 
 of  the  fame  kind.  But  thefe  workings  of  fpiritual  pride,  I 
 endeavoured  to  cru(h  in  their  firft  appearances,  and  have  not 
 llnce  obferved  any  aifedlion,  either  of  joy  or  forrow,  but 
 what  appeared  genuine  and  unaffe^ed.     But, 
 
 6thly,  aad  lafily.  The  effe^s  of  this  work  have  likewife  been 
 very  remarkable.  I  doubt  not  but  that  many  of  thefe  people 
 have  gained  more  doSlrinal  knowledge  of  divine  truths,  fince 
 I  firfl  vifited  them  in  June  lail,  than  could  have  been  infiilled 
 into  their  minds  by  the  mofl  diligent  ufe  of  proper  and  in- 
 fi:ru(flive  means  for  vf\\o\c  years  together,  without  fuch  a  di- 
 vine influence.  Their  Pagan  notions  and  idolatrous  praflices 
 feem  to  be  entirely  abandoned  in  thefe  parts.  They  are  re- 
 gulated, and  appear  regularly  difpofcd  in  the  ^^d\x%  oi  mar- 
 riage; an  inftancc  whereof  I  have  given  in  my  Journal  of 
 Auguft  14.  They  feem  generally  divorced  from  drunkennefs ^ 
 their  darling  vice,  and  the  "  fin  that  cafily  befets  them :"  fo 
 that  I  do  not  know  of  more  than  two  cr  three  who  have  been 
 
 my 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  369 
 
 jny  (leady  hearers,  that  have  drank  to  excefs  fince  I  firft  vi- 
 fited  tncMi,  although  before  it  was  common  for  foine  or  o- 
 ther  of  them  to  be  drunk  alniolt  every  day:  and  fome  of  them 
 feem  now  to  fear  this  fin  in  particular  more  than  death  itfelf. 
 A  principle  of  honefty  and  jultice  appears  in  many  of  them, 
 and  they  feem  concerned  to  difcharge  their  old  debts,  which 
 tney  have  n^gle<fi:ed,  and,  perhaps,  fcarce  thought  of  for 
 years  part.  Tneir  manner  of  living  is  much  more  decent 
 and  comfortable  than  formerly,  having  now  the  benefit  of 
 that  money  which  they  ufed  to  confume  upon  Itrong  drink. 
 L'jve  feemb  to  reign  among  them,  efpecially  thofe  wno  have 
 gi^'en  evidences  oi  having  pafTed  a  faving  change  :  and  I  ne- 
 ver faw  any  appearance  ot  bitternefs  or  cenfv'hufncfs  in  thefe, 
 njr  any  dilpofition  to  "efteem  themfelves  better  than  others," 
 who  had  not  received  the  like  mercy. 
 
 As  their  forrows  under  conv'i£iions  have  been  great  and 
 preiling,  fo  miny  of  them  have  fince  appeared  to  ^'  rejoice 
 *'  with  joy  unfpeakable,  and  full  of  glory  :''  and  yet  I  never 
 faw  any  thing  ecfiatic  o\-  fl'ghty  in  their  joy.  Their  c.-nfo- 
 lations  do  not  incline  them  to  air  and  iightnefs  ;  but,  on  the 
 contrary,  are  attended  with  folemnity,  and  oftenti.nes  with 
 tears,  and  an  apparent  brokennefs  of  heart,  as  may  be  feen  in 
 feveral  paflTages  of  my  Journal:  and  in  this  refpedl  fome  of 
 them  have  been  furprifed  at  themfelves,  and  have  with  con- 
 cern obferved  to  me,  that  "  when  their  hearts  have  been  glad,'* 
 (xvoich  is  a  pbrafe  they  commonly  make  ufe  of  to  exprels  fpi- 
 ritual  joy),  "  they  could  not  help  crying  for  all." 
 
 And  now,  upon  the  whole,  I  think,  I  may  juftly  fay,  here 
 are  all  the  fymptoms  and  evidences  of  a  remarkable  work  of 
 grace  among  thefe  Indians,  that  can  reafonably  be  defired  or 
 looked  for.  May  the  great  Author  of  this  work  maintain 
 and  promote  the  fame  here,  and  propagate  '\ievery  ivhere,  till  ' 
 "  the  whole  earth  be  filled  with  his  glory  !"     Amen. 
 
 I  have  now  rode  more  than  three  thoufand  miles,  that  I 
 have  kept  an  exact  account  of,  fmce  the  beginning  of  March 
 lafl: ;  and  almoft  the  whole  of  it  has  been  in  my  own  proper 
 bufinefs  as  a  miffrmary,  upon  the  defign  (either  immediately 
 or  more  remotely)  of  propagating  Chrijl'ian  knoxvledge  among 
 the  Indians.  I  have  taken  pains  to  look  out  for  a  colleague, 
 or  cojnpanion,  to  travel  with  me:  and  have  likewife  ufed  en- 
 deavours to  procure  fomething  for  his  fupport,  among  religious 
 perfons  in  New- England,  which  coft  me  a  journey  of  feveral 
 hundred  miles  in  length  ;  but  have  not  as  yet  found  any  per- 
 fon  qualified  and  difpofed  for  this  good  work,  although  I  had. 
 
 T   A  fome 
 
370      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 fonie  encouragement  from  ymn'ijlers  and  others,  that  it  was- 
 hopeful  a  maintenance  might  be  procured  for  one,  when  the 
 man  Ihould  be  found. 
 
 I  have  likewife  of  late  reprefented  to  the  gentlemen  con- 
 cerned with  this  mijfitn,  the  neceiTity  of  having  an  Englifh 
 fchool  fpeedily  ^tl  up  among  thefe  Indians,  who  are  now  will- 
 ing to  be  at  the  pains  of  gathering  together  in  a  body  for  this 
 purpofe.  And  in  order  hereto,  have  humbly  propofed  to  them 
 the  coUe^ing  of  money  for  the  maintenance  of  a  fchool- 
 mafler,  and  defraying  of  other  nece/Fary  charges  in  the  pro- 
 motion of  this  good  work  ;  which  they  are  now  attempting 
 in  the  feveral  congregations  of  Chriflians  to  which  they  rc- 
 fpeftivcly  belong. 
 
 The  feveral  companies  of  Indians  I  have  preached  to  in 
 the  fummer  paft,  live  at  great  d'flances  from  each  other.  It 
 is  more  than  feventy  miles  from  Crofweekfung  in  New-Jer- 
 fey,  to  the  Forks  of  Delaware  in  Penfylvania.  And  from 
 thence  to  fundry  of  the  Indian  fettlements  I  vifited  on  Suf- 
 quahannah,  is  more  than  an  hundred  and  twenty  miles.  And 
 fo  much  of  my  time  is  neceffarily  confumed  in  journeying, 
 that  I  can  have  but  little  for  any  of  my  necefTary  ftudies,  and 
 confequently  for  the  ftudy  of  the  Indian  languages  in  particu- 
 lar ;  and  efpecially  feeing  I  am  obliged  to  difcourfe  fo  fre- 
 quently to  the  Indians  at  each  of  thefe  places  while  I  am  with 
 them,  in  order  to  redeem  time  to  vifit  the  reft.  I  am,  at 
 times,  almoft  difcouraged  from  attempting  to  gain  any  ac- 
 quaintance with  the  Indian  languages,  they  are  fo  very  nume- 
 rous, (fome  account  of  which  I  gave  in  my  Journal  of  May 
 laft),  and  efpecially  feeing  my  other  labours  and  fatigues  in- 
 grofs  almoft  the  whole  of  mj'  time,  and  bear  exceeding  hard 
 
 upon  my  covftitution,  fo  that  my  health  is  much  impaired. 
 
 However,  I  have  taken  confiderahle  pains  to  learn  the  Dela- 
 ware language,  and  propofe  ftill  to  do  fo,  as  far  as  my  other 
 bufmefs  and  bodily  health  will  admit.  I  have  already  made 
 fome  proficiency  in  it,  though  I  have  laboured  under  many 
 and  great  difadvantages  in  my  attempts  of  that  nature.  And 
 it  is  but  juft  to  obferve  here,  that  all  the  pains  I  took  to  ac- 
 quaint myfelf  with  the  language  of  the  Indians  I  fpcnt  nny 
 firft  year  with,  were  of  little  or  no  fervice  to  me  here  among 
 the  Delawares ;  fo  that  my  work,  when  I  came  among  thefe 
 Indians,  was  all  to  begin  anew. 
 
 As  thefe  poor  ignorant  Pagans  ftood  in  need  of  having  "line 
 "  upon  line,  and  precept  upon  precept,"  in  order  to  their  be- 
 ing inftru'fted  and  grounded  in  the  principles  of  Chriftianity  ; 
 io  I  preached  "  publicly,  and  taught  from  houfc  to  houfe," 
 
 almoft 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  371 
 
 almoft  every  day  for  whole  weeks  together,  when  I  was  with 
 them.  And  my  public  difcourfes  did  not  then  make  up  the 
 one  half  of  my  work,  while  there  was  fo  many  conftantly 
 coming  to  me  with  that  important  inquiry,  "  What  mufl: 
 *'  we  do  to  be  faved  ?"  and  opening  to  me  the  various  exer- 
 cifes  of  their  minds.  And  yet  I  can  fay,  (to  the  praife  of  rich 
 grace),  that  the  apparent  fuccefs  with  which  my  labours  were 
 crowned,  unfpeakably  more  than  compenfated  for  the  labour 
 itfelf,  and  was  likewife  a  great  means  of  fupporting  and  carry- 
 ing me  through  the  bufinefs  and  fatigues,  which  (it  feems)  my 
 nature  would  have  funk  under,  without  fuch  an  encouraging 
 profpe^t.  But  although  this  fuccefs  has  afforded  matter  of 
 fupport,  comfort,  and  thankfulnefs  ;  yet  in  this  feafon  I  have 
 found  great  need  of  affiftance  in  my  work,  and  have  been 
 much  oppreffed  for  want  of  one  to  bear  a  part  of  my  labours 
 
 and  hard/hips. 
 
 *'  May  the  Lord  of  the  harveft  fend  forth  other  labourers 
 "  into  this  part  of  his  harveft,  that  thofe  who  fit  in  darknefs 
 "  may  fee  great  light,  and  that  the  whole  earth  may  be  filled 
 "  with  the  knowledge  of  himfelf !     Amen." 
 
 November  20.  DAVID     BRAINERD. 
 
 J745- 
 
 3  A  2 
 
Divine  Grace  difplayedj 
 
 O     R, 
 
 The  Continuance  and  Progress 
 
 O  F     A 
 
 Remarkable  Work  of  Grace 
 Among  fome  of  the  INDIANS 
 
 Belonging  to  the  Provinces  of  New-Jersey  and  Pen- 
 
 SYLVANIA, 
 
 Juftly    REPRESENTED    in    a 
 
 JOURNAL 
 
 Kept  by  order  of  the  Honourable  Society  (in  Scotland)  for 
 propagating  Christian  Knowledge. 
 
 With  fome  general  REMARKS. 
 
 To  which  isfubjoined  an  APPENDIX,  containing 
 fome  account  of  iundry  things,  elptciaily  of  the  dif- 
 ficulties attending  the  work  of  a  MifTionary  among 
 the  INDIANS. 
 
 By      DAVID      BRAINERD, 
 
 Mioifter  of  the  Gofpel,  and  Miffionary  from  the  faid  Society. 
 
 Publi/hed  by  the  Reverend  and  Worthy  Correfpondents  of 
 the  faid  Society. 
 
 Rom.  ix.  2^.  26   I  will  call  them  my  peop  e,  that  were  n,  t  my  people;  and  her, 
 beloved,    that    was    not  beloved.      And   it  fhall    come   to   pafs,  that  in   the 
 place  where  it  wai  faid  unto  them.   Ye  are  not  my  people;   there  fhall  they 
 be  called.  The  children  of  the  living  God. 
 Eph-  V.  8.  Ye  were  fometimcs  darknefs,    but  now  are  ye  light  in  the  Lord- 
 S?fal.  cxviii.  2\.    This  ii  the  Lord's  doing,  it  is  marvclloui  in  our  eyes. 
 
 Printed  in  the  Year  MDCCLXV. 
 
Crofweekfung  in  New-Jerfey,  1745. 
 
 Lord's  day,  November  24.  Preached  both  parts  of  the 
 day  from  the  (lory  of  Zaccheus,  Luke  xix.  1. — 9.  In 
 the;  latter  exercife,  when  I  opened  and  infifted  upon  the  Jalva- 
 tion  that  comes  to  the  Jinner,  upon  his  becoming  afon  of  Jbra- 
 ham,  or  a  true  believer,  the  word  feemed  to  be  attended  with 
 
 divine  power  to  the  hearts  of  the  hearers. Numbers  were 
 
 much  affefted  with  divine  truths ; — former  convidrions  were 
 revived  ; — one  or  two  perfons  newly  awakened  ; — and  a  moft 
 affeflionate  engagement  in  divine  fervice  appeared  among 
 them  univerfally. 
 
 The  impreffions  they  were  under  appeared  to  be  the  ge- 
 nuine effeft  of  God's  word  brought  home  to  their  hearts,  by 
 the  power  and  influence  of  the  divine  Spirit. 
 
 November  26-  After  having  fpent  fome  time  in  private 
 conferences  with  my  people,  I  difcourfed  publicly  among 
 them  from  John  v.  i.  c;.  I  was  favoured  with  fome  fpeciat 
 freedom  and  fervency  in  my  difcourfe,  and  a  powerful  energy 
 accompanied  divine  truths.  Many  wept  and  fobed  affec- 
 tionately, and  fcarce  any  appeared  unconcerned  in  the  whole 
 affembly.  The  influence  that  feized  the  audience  appeared 
 gentle,  and  yet  pungent  and  efficacious.  It  produced  no 
 boifterous  commotion  of  the  paflions,  but  feemed  deeply  to 
 affect  the  heart;  and  excited  in  the  perfons  under  convictions 
 
 of  their  loft  ftate,  heavy  groans  and  tears : and  in  others 
 
 who  had  obtained  comfort,  a  fweet  and  humble  melting.  It 
 feemed  like  the  gentle  but  fl:eady  fliowers  that  effeflually  wa- 
 ter the  earth,  without  violently  beating  upon  the  furface. 
 
 The  perfons  lately  awakened,  were,  fome  of  them,  deeply 
 diftrefled  for  their  fouls,  and  appeared  earnellly  folicitous  to 
 obtain  an  intereft  in  Chrift :  and  fome  of  them,  after  public 
 "worlhip  was  over,  in  anguifli  of  fpirit,  faid,  "They  knew 
 **  not  what  to  do,  nor  how  to  get  their  wicked  hearts  chan- 
 "  ged,"  dc. 
 
 November  28.  Difcourfed  to  the  Indians  publicly,  after 
 having  ufed  fome  private  endeavours  to  inftru(ft  and  excite 
 fome  in  the  duties  of  Chriftianity.  Opened  and  made  re- 
 marks 
 
^76     DIVINE     GRACE    DISPLAYED 
 
 marks  upon  the  facred  flory  of  our  Lord's  transfgurat'ion, 
 Luke  ix.  28. — 36  Had  a  principal  view  in  my  inlilting  upon 
 this  paffa^e  ot  fcripture  to  the  edification  and  confolation  of 
 God's  people.  And  obferved  fome,  that  I  have  realon  to 
 think  are  truly  fuch,  exceedingly  affefted  with  an  account  of 
 the  glory  of  Chrifl:  in  his  transfiguration  ;  and  filled  with  long- 
 ing defires  of  being  with  him,  that  they  might  with  open  face 
 behold  his  glory- 
 After  public  fervice  was  over,  I  aflced  one  of  them,  who 
 wept  and  fobed  moft  affeclionately,  "  What  flie  now  want- 
 "  ed?"  She  replied,  "Oh  to  be  with  Chrifl!  fhe  did  not 
 **  know  how  to  ftay,"  Cc.  This  was  a  blefied  refre(hing 
 fcaf m  to  the  religious  people  in  general.'  The  Lord  Jefus 
 Chrift  feemed  to  manifeft  his  divine  glory  to  them,  as  when 
 trans fgured  before  his  difciples.  And  they,  with  the  di(^ 
 ciplci.,  were  ready  univerfally  to  fay,  "Lord,  it  is  good  for 
 *'  us  to  be  here." 
 
 The  infiu(.nce  of  God*s  word  was  not  confned  to  thofe 
 who  had  given  evidences  of  being  truly  graciou,-,  though  at 
 this  time,  I  calculated  my  difcourfe  for,  and  direded  it  chief- 
 ly t  J  iuch  :  but  it  appeared  to  be  a  feafon  of  divine  power  in 
 tiie  whole  afTeuibiy  ;  (o  that  mofl;  were,  in  fome  meafure, 
 afiecfted.  And  one  aged  man  in  particular,  lately  awakened, 
 •was  now  brought  under  deep  and  prefTing  concern  fir  l.is  loul, 
 and  was  earneftiy  inquifitive  "how  he  might  find  Jcfus  Chrifl." 
 God  feems  ftiil  to  vouchfafe  his  divine  prefence  and  the  in- 
 fluence of  his  bleffeti  Spirit  to  accompany  his  word,  at  leafl 
 in  fome  mealurf-,  in  all  our  meetings  for  divine  worfliip. 
 
 November  30.  Preached  near  night,  after  having  fpent 
 fome  hours  in  private  conference  with  fome  of  my  people  a- 
 bout  their  fouls  concerns.  Explained  and  infilled  upon  the 
 flory  of  the  rich  man  and  Lazarus,  Luke  xvi.  19.  26.  The 
 word  made  powerful  impreiTions  upon  many  in  the  afTembly, 
 efpecially  while  I  difcourfed  of  the  blefTednefs  of"  Lazarus 
 "  in  Abraham's  bof  )m.''  This  I  could  perceive,  afFefled  them 
 much  more  than  what  I  fpoke  of  the  rich  man^s  mifcry  and 
 torments.  And  thus  it  has  been  ufually  with  them.  They 
 have  almofl  always  appeared  much  more  affcdled  with  the 
 cojyifortable  than  the  dreadful  truths  of  God's  word.  And 
 that  which  has  diflrelfed  many  of  them  under  convi£lii)ns, 
 is,  that  they  found  they  wanted,  and  could  not  obtain  the 
 happinefs  of  the  godly;  at  leafl  they  have  often  appeared  to 
 be  more  afFecled  with  //;/'/,  than  with  the  terrors  of  hell. 
 But  whatever  be  the  means  of  their  awakening,  it  is  plain, 
 numbers  are  made  deeply  fenfible  of  their  fm  and  milery,  the 
 
 wickednefs 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  377 
 
 wickednefs  and  ftubbornnefs  of  their  own  hearts,  their  utter 
 inability  to  help  themfelves,  or  to  come  to  Chrill  for  help, 
 vithout  divine  affiftance ;  and  fo  arc  brought  to  fee  their 
 ferijlnng  need  of  Chrift  to  do  all  for  them,  and  to  lie  at  the 
 foot  oi foverejgn  mercy. 
 
 Lord'b  day,  December  i.  Difcourfed  to  my  people  in  the 
 forenoon  from  Luke  xvi.  27.  31.  There  appeared  an  unfeign- 
 ed affecftion  in  divers  perfons,  and  fome  ieemed  deeply  un- 
 prefTed  with  divine  truths. 
 
 In  the  afternoon  preached  to  a  number  of  white  people ; 
 at  which  time  the  Indians  attended  with  diligence,  and  many 
 of  them  were  able  to  underftand  a  coniiderable  part  of  the 
 difcourfe. 
 
 At  night  difcourfed  to  my  people  again,  and  gave  them 
 fome  particular  cautions  and  ducftions  relating  to  their  con- 
 du(5l  in  divers  refpefts.  And  prefled  them  to  watchfulness  in 
 all  their  deportment,  feeing  they  were  encon^pafTed  with  thofe 
 that  "  waited  for  their  halting,"  and  who  fiood  ready  to  draw 
 them  into  temptations  of  every  kind,  and  then  to  expole  re- 
 ligion for  their  mibiteps. 
 
 Lord's  day,  December  8.  Difcourfed  on  the  ftory  of  the 
 blind  man,  John  ix.  There  appeared  no  remarkable  effect 
 of  the  word  upon  the  aflembly  at  this  time.  The  perfons 
 "who  have  lately  been  much  concerned  for  their  fouls,  feemed 
 nowr  not  fo  aftefted  nor  folicitous  to  obtain  an  intertrt  in 
 Chrifl  as  has  been  ufual ;  although  they  attended  divine  fervicc 
 with  ferioufnefs  and  diHgence. 
 
 Such  have  b^en  the  doings  rf  the  Lord  here,  in  awakening 
 finners,  and  affVfting  the  hearts  of  thofe  who  are  brought  to 
 folid  comfort,  with  a  frefli  fen fe  of  divine  things  from  time 
 to  time,  that  it  is  now  ftrange  to  fee  the  affcmbly  fit  with  dry 
 eyes,  and  without  f  jbs  and  groans. 
 
 December  12.  Preached  from  the  parable  of  the  ten  vir- 
 gins, Matth.  XXV.  The  divine  power  feemed  in  fome  meafure 
 to  attend  this  difcourfe,  in  v.hich  I  was  favoured  with  vn- 
 common  freedom  and  plainnefs  of  addrefs,  and  enabled  to  open 
 divine  truths,  and  explain   rhem   to    the   capacities   of    n  y 
 
 people,  in  a  manner   heyml  myfelf. There   appeared    in 
 
 many  perfons  an  affeftionate  concern  for  thtir  loids ;  al- 
 though the  concern  in  general  feemed  not  fo  deep  and  prefix 
 ing  as  it  had  formerly  done.  Yet  it  was  refrefliing  to  Kc 
 many  melted  into  tears  and  unafFecled  fobs;  fome  with  ■■iftnfs 
 of  divine  love,  and  fome  for  luant  of  it. 
 
 Lord's  day,  December  15.  Preached  to  the  Indians  from 
 Lukexiii.  -24.  zS.   Divine  truths   fell  with  v;cight  and  power 
 
 3   B  rpoa 
 
378      DIVINE     GRACE     D  I  S  P  L  A  Y  E  I^ 
 
 upon  the  audience,  and  feemed  to  reach  the  hearts  of  many. 
 Near  night  difcourfed  to  them  again  from  Matth.  xxv.  31.  to 
 46.  At  which  feafon  alfo,  the  word  appeared  to  be  accompa- 
 nied with  a  divine  influence,  and  made  powerful  impreflions 
 upon  the  afTembly  in  general,  as  well  as  upon  divers  perfons 
 in  a  very  fpecial  and  particular  manner.  This  was  an  ama- 
 zing feaion  of  grace!  '■'■  The  word  of  the  Lord,"  this  day, 
 **  was  quick  and  powerful,  fliarper  than  a  two-edged  fword," 
 and  pierced  to  the  hearts  of  many.  The  afTembly  was  gieat- 
 ly  aife6led,  and  deeply  wrought  upon  ;  yet  without  fo  much 
 apparent  commotion  of  the  pafTions,  as  was  ufual  in  the  be- 
 ginning of  this  work  of  grace.  The  impreflions  made  by  the 
 word  of  God  upon  the  audience  appeared  folid,  rational,  and 
 deep,  worthy  of  the  folemn  truths  by  means  of  which  they 
 were  produced,  and  far  from  being  the  effetSls  of  any  fudden 
 fright,   ox gronndlefs  perturbation  of  mind. 
 
 O  how  did  the  hearts  of  the  hearers  feem  to  bow  under  the 
 weight  of  divine  truths !  And  how  evident  did  it  now  appear 
 that  they  received  and  felt  them,  "  not  as  the  word  of  man, 
 *'  but  as  the  word  of  God!"  None  can  frame  a  jufl:  idea  of 
 the  appearance  of  our  afTembly  at  this  time,  but  thofe  who 
 have  feen  a  congregation  folemnly  awed,  and  deeply  imprejfed 
 by  the  fpecial  power  and  influence  of  divine  truths  delivered 
 to  them  in  the  name  of  God. 
 
 December  i6.  Difcourfed  to  m.y  people  in  the  evening 
 from  Luke  xi.  i. — 13.  After  having  infifted  fome  time  upon 
 the  pth  verfe,  wherein  there  is  a  command  and  encourage- 
 ment to  afk  for  divine  favours,  I  called  upon  them  to  afk 
 fo'r  a  new  heart  with  utmcft  importunity,  as  the  man  men- 
 tioned in  the  parable,  1  was  difcourfmg  upon,  pleaded  for 
 loaves  of  bread  zt  midnight. 
 
 There  was  much  affeclion  and  concern  in  the  afTembly ; 
 and  efpecially  one  woman  appeared  in  great  diftrefs  for  her 
 foul.  She  was  brought  to  fuch  an  agony  in  feeking  after 
 Chrifi,  that,  the  fweet  ran  ofi'her  face  for  a  conllderable  time 
 together,  although  the  evening  wa5  very  cold;  and  her  bitter 
 cries  were  the  mofl  afFeCling  indication  of  the  iniv ard  zng\xiQ\ 
 of  her  heart. 
 
 December  21.  My  people  having  now  attained  to  a  confi- 
 derable  degree  of  knowledge  in  the  principles  of  Chriftianity, 
 I  thought  it  proper  to  fet  up  a  catechetieal  le£iure  among 
 them;  and  this  evening  attempted  fomething  in /Z'^z/orw  ; 
 propofing  queflions  to  them  agreeable  to  the  Reverend  Af« 
 fembly's  Shorter  Catechifm,  receiving  their  anfwers,  and  then 
 explaining  and  inlifting  as  appeared  necefTary  and  proper  upon 
 
 each 
 
AMONG     THE    INDIANS.  37^ 
 
 each  queftlon.     After  which  I  endeavoured  to  make  fome 
 praftical  improvement  of  the  whole.     This  was  the  method 
 
 I  entered  upon. They  were  able  readily  and  rationally  to 
 
 anfwer  many  important  qucftions  I  propofed  to  them:  fo 
 that,  upon  trial,   1  found  their  do^rinal  knowledge  to  exceed 
 
 my  own  cxpciflations.- ^In   the   improvement   of  my   dif- 
 
 courfe,  when  I  came  to  infer  and  open  the  blefTcdnefs  of 
 thofe  who  have  fo  great  and  glorious  a  God,  as  had  before 
 been  fpoken  of,  "  for  their  everlafling  friend  and  portion,'* 
 fundry  v/ere  much  affefted;  and  efpecially  when  I  exhorted, 
 and  endeavoured  to  perfuade  them  "■  to  be  reconciled  to  God," 
 through  his  dear  Son,  and  thus  to  fecure  an  interefl  in  his 
 everlafting  favour.  So  that  they  appeared  to  be  not  only  en- 
 lightened and  injlru^ed,  but  affe^ed  and  engaged  in  their  fouls 
 concern  by  this  method  of  difcourfing. 
 
 Lord's  day,  December  22.  Difcourfed  upon  the  ftory  of 
 the  young  man  in  the  gofpel,  Matth.  ix.  16. — 22.  God  made 
 it  a  feafonable  word,  I  am  perfuaded,  to  fome  fouls. 
 
 There  were  fundry  perlons  of  the  Indians  newly  come 
 here,  who  had  frequently  lived  among  Quakers;  and  being 
 more  civilized  and  conformed  to  Englifti  manners  than  the 
 generality  of  the  Indians,  they  had  imbibed  fome  of  the  Qua- 
 kers errors,  efpecially  this  fundamental  one,  viz.  That  if  men 
 will  but  live  foberly  and  honeftly,  according  to  the  diftates  of 
 their  own  confciences,  (or  the  light  ivifhin),  there  is  then  no 
 
 danger  or  doubt  of  their  falvation,  6r. Thefe  pcrfons  I 
 
 found  much  vv^orfe  to  deal  with  than  thofe  who  are  wholly 
 under  Pagan  darknefs,  who  make  no  pretences  to  knowledge 
 in  Chriftianity  at  all,  nor  have  any  /elf-righteous  foundation 
 to  fland  upon.  However,  they  all,  except  one,  appeared 
 now  convinced,  that  this /o/'fr,  hone/}  life,  of  itfelf,  was  not 
 fufficient  to  falvation ;  fince  Chrill:  himfeif  had  declared  it  fo 
 in  the  cafe  of  the  young  man.  And  feemed  in  fome  meafure 
 concerned  to  obtain  that  change  of  heart  which  I  had  been 
 labouring  to  fliew  them  the  neceflity  of. 
 
 This  was  likewife  a  feafon  of  ccvfort  to  fome  fouls,  and 
 in  particular  to  one,  (the  fame  mentioned  in  mv  Journal  of 
 the  i6th  inflant),  who  never  before  obtained  any  fettled  com- 
 fort, though  I  have  abundant  reafon  to  think  fhe  had  paficd 
 a  faving  change  fome  days  before. 
 
 She  nov.-  appeared  in  a  heavenly  frame  of  mind,  compofed 
 and  delighted  with  the  divine  will.  "When  I  came  to  difcourfc 
 particularly  with  her,  and  to  enquire  of  her,  how  flie  got  re- 
 lief and  deliverance  from  the  fpiritual  diflrelfes  flie  had  lately 
 
 3  B  2  been 
 
380      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 b;en  under,  fhe  anfwered  in  broken  Englifh,  *  "  Me  try,  me 
 *'  tr^,  fave  myfelf,  lafl  my  ftrcngth  be  all  gone,  (nicaning 
 "  her  ability  to  fave  herfelt),  c,  uld  n  t  me  (Ur  bit  further. 
 "  Den  laft,  me  forced  let  Jtius  Chi  id  alone,  fend  mc  hell  if 
 *'  he  pleafe."  I  faid.  But  you  was  nut  willing  t^  go  to  hell, 
 •was  you?  She  replied,  f  "  Cuuld  not  me  help  it.  My 
 "  hoart  he  would  wicked  for  all.  Could  n^it  me  make  him 
 **  good  ;"  (meaning  fhe  law  it  was  rigl:t  fhe  fhould  go  t  hell, 
 becaufe  her  heart  was  wicked,  and  would  be  fo  alter  all  flic 
 could  do  to  mend  it).  1  afked  her,  How  fhe  got  out  of  this 
 cafe?  She  anfwered  ftill  in  the  fame  broken  language,  %  "By, 
 **  by  my  heart  be  grad  defperately."  I  afkcd  her  why  her 
 heart  was  glad?  She  replied,  "  Grad  my  heart  Jefus  Chjifl 
 "  do  what  he  pleafe  with  me.  Den  me  tink,  grad  my  heart 
 *'  Jefus  Chrifl:  fend  me  hell.  Did  not  me  care  where  he  put 
 **  me,   me  lobe  him  for  all,"  6c.  ■ 
 
 And  fhe  could  n  )t  readily  be  convinced,  but  that  fhe  was 
 willing  to  go  to  hell,  if  Chrift  was  pleafed  to  fend  her  there. 
 Though  the  truth  evidently  was,  her  will  was  fo  fwallowed 
 up  in  the  divine  will,  that  fhe  could  not  frame  any  hell  in  her 
 imagination  that  would  be  dreadtul  or  undeflrable,  provided 
 it  was  but  the  will  of  God  to  fend  her  to  it. 
 
 Toward  night  difcourfed  to  them  again  in  the  catechetical 
 method  I  entered  upon  the  evening  before.  And  when  I 
 came  to  improve  the  truths  I  had  explained  to  them,  and  to 
 anlwer  that  queftion,  "  But  how  fhall  I  know  whether  God 
 "  has  chofen  me  to  everlafting  life,"  by  preffing  them  to 
 come  and  give  up  their  hearts  to  Chrift,  and  thereby  "  to 
 "  make  thtir  eleftion  fure;"  they  then  appeared  much  afftft- 
 ed :  and  the  perfons  under  concern  were  afrefh  engaged  in 
 f<  eking  after  an  interefl  in  him  ;  while  fome  others,  who  had 
 pbtained  comfort  before,  were  refrefhed  to  find  that  love  to 
 
 *  In  proper  Englifh  thus,  *'  I  tiled  and  tried  to  fave  myfelf,  till 
 **  at  ]a(f  my  flrength  was  all  gone,  and  I  could  not  ftir  any  further. 
 *'  I  hen  at  lafl  I  was  forced  to  let  Jefus  Chrift  alone  to  fend  me  to 
 ♦'  hell  if  hf  pleafed  " 
 
 f  In  plain  Englifli  thus,  "  I  could  not  help  it.  My  heart  would 
 *'  be  W'cked  for  all  what  I  could  do.      I  could  not  make  it  good." 
 
 :};   "  By  and  by  my  heart  was  exceeding  glad. My  heart  was 
 
 '•  jlhd  that  Jefus  Chnfl:  would  do  with  mt  what  he  pleafed.  Then 
 •'  I  thought  my  heart  would  be  glad  although  Chrifl  fhould  fend 
 "  me  to  I  eJI  I  did  not  care  '.vhere  he  put  me,  1  fhould  love  him 
 "  for  all  ;    /.  e.  do  what  he  would  with  me." 
 
 g»4 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  381 
 
 God  in  themfelves,    which  was  an  evidence  of  his  tle^  ng 
 love  to  them. 
 
 December  25.   The  Indians  having  been  ufed  up;on  Ch'ift- 
 mas-days  to  diink  and  revel  among  Imne  of  the  •white  people 
 in  thelc  pans,   I  thought  it  proper  this  day  to  call  them  toge- 
 ther,  and  dilcourfe  to  them  upon  divine  things:   which  I    ac- 
 cordingly did  from  the  parable   of  the   barren  fig-tree,  Luke 
 xiii.  6. — 9.     A    divine    influence,    I  am  perluaded,   accom- 
 panied the  word  at  this  feafon.     The  power  of  God  appear- 
 ed in  the  aflembly,  not  by  producing  any  remarkabL  cries,  but 
 by  fliocking  and  roufmg  at  heart  (as  it  feemed)  ieveral  ftupid 
 creatures,  that  were  Icaice  ever  moved  with  any  concern  be» 
 fore.     The  power  attending  divine  truths  feemed  to  have  the 
 m^\xt\\cc  oi  tht  earthc]uake   rather   than  the  'whi?-hv!nd  upon. 
 them.     Their  pajjions  were  not  fo  much  alarmed  as  has  been 
 common  here  in  times  pofl,  but  xhtir  judgments  appeared  to 
 be  powerfully  convinced   by    the  mafierly  and  crmquering  in- 
 fluence of  divine   truths.      The  impreilions   made   upon  the 
 affembly  in  general,  Jeeraed  notfuperfcial,  but  deep  and  heart- 
 affe(^iRg.     O  how  ready  did  they  now  appear   univerfally  to 
 embrace  and  comply  with  every  thing  they   heard  and  were 
 convinced  was  duty  !     God  was  in  the  midfl  of  us  of  a  truth, 
 bowing  and  melting  flubborn  hearts  !    How  many  tears   and 
 fobs  were  then  to  be  feen  and  heard  among  us !    What  live- 
 linefs  and  ftrift  attention!  what  eagernefs  and  intenfenefs  of 
 mind  appeared  in  the  whole  alTembly   in  the   time   of  divine 
 fervice!    They  feemed  to  watch  and  wait  for  the  dropping  of 
 God's  word,  as  the  thirfly  earth  for  the  "  former  and  latter 
 «  rain." 
 
 Afterwards  I  difcourfed  to  them  on  the  duty  of  hulbands 
 and  wives,  from  Eph.  v.  22. — 33. ;  and  have  reafon  to  think 
 
 this  was  a  word  in  feafon. Spent  fome  time  further  in  the 
 
 evening,  in  inculcating  the  truths  I  had  infifted  upon  in  my 
 former  difcourfe  refpt6\ing  the  barren  fig  tree,  and  obferved 
 a  p  iwerful  influence  (lill  accompany  what  was  Ipcken. 
 
 December  2O.  This  evening  I  was  vifited  by  a  perfcn  un- 
 der great  fpiricual  exercife.  "j  he  moft  remaikable  iriltance 
 of  thi^kind  I  ever  faw.  She  was  a  woman  of  (J  believe)  more 
 thsLu/'Jurfcore  years  old,  and  appealed  to  be  much  broken  and 
 very  child Jh  through  age,  fo  that  it  feemed  impollible  for 
 man  to  infl;il  into  her  mind  any  notions  of  divine  things,  not 
 lo  much  as  to  give  her  any  du^.  inal  inftruftion,  bccaufe  Ihe 
 
 feemed  uncapable   of  being  taught. She  was  led  by  the 
 
 hand  into  my  houfe,  and  appeared  in  extren.e  anguifh.  1  zik- 
 ^'d  her,  what  ailed  her:    She  anlwcrcd,  "  Ihat  her  heart  was 
 
 "  diftrefl^d, 
 
382      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 "  diftrefled,  and  fhe  feared  flie  fhould  never  find  Chrift."  I 
 afked  her,  when  fhe  began  to  be  concerned?  with  divers  o- 
 ther  queftions  relating  to  her  diftrefs.  To  all  which  fhe  an- 
 fwered,  for  fubflance,  to  this  cffeft,  viz.  That  flie  had 
 heard  me  preach  many  times,  but  never  knew  any  thing  about 
 it,  never  "  felt  it  in  her  heart"  till  the  lafl:  Sabbath ;  and  then 
 it  came  (fhe  faid)  "  all  one  as  if  a  needle  had  been  thruft  into 
 "  her  heart ;"  fince  which  time,  fhe  had  no  reflday  nor  night. 
 She  added,  that  on  the  evening  before  Chriflmas,  a  number 
 of  Indians  being  together  at  the  houfe  where  fhe  was,  and 
 difcourfing  about  Chri/l,  their  talk  pricked  her  heart,  fo  that 
 llie  could  not  fit  up,  but  fell  down  on  her  bed  ;  at  which  time 
 J}?e  iveftt  aruay,  (as  fhe  expreffed  it),  and  felt  as  if  fhe  dream- 
 ed, and  yet  is  confident  fhe  did  not  dream.  When  fhe  was  thus 
 gone,  fhe  faw,  flie  fays,  two  paths,  one  appeared  very  broad  and 
 crooked  ;  and  that,  fhe  fays,  turned  to  the  left  hand.  The  other 
 appeared  ftraii  and  very  narrow;  and  that  went  up  the  hill 
 to  the  right  hand.  She  travelled,  fhe  faid,  for  fome  time  up 
 the  narrow  right-hand  path,  till  at  length  fomething  fcemed 
 to  obflruft  her  journey.  She  fometimes  called  it  darknefs, 
 and  then  defcribed  it  otherwife,  and  fecmed  to  compare  it  to 
 a  block  or  bar.  She  then  remembered,  fhe  fays,  what  fhe 
 had  heard  me  fay  about  "  flriving  to  enter  in  at  the  flrait 
 '^  gate,"  (although  flie  took  little  notice  of  it,  at  the  time 
 when  file  heard  me  difcourfe  upon  that  fubjeft),  and  thought 
 *he  would  climb  over  this  bar.  But  juft  as  fhe  was  thinking 
 o(  this,  file  came  back  iigain,  as  flie  termed  it,  meaning  that 
 llie  came  to  herfelf ;  whereupon  her  foul  was  extremely  dif- 
 treffed,  apprehending  fhe  had  now  turned  back  and  forfaken 
 Chrifl,  and  that  there  was  therefore  no  hope  of  mercy  for 
 faer. 
 
 As  I  was  fenfible  that  trances,  and  imaginary  views  of 
 things,  are  oi dangerous  tendency  in  religion,  when  fought  after, 
 and  depended  upon;  fo  I  could  not  but  be  much  concerned  a- 
 bout  this  exercife,  efpecially  at  firfl:;  apprehending  this  might 
 be  a  defign  of  Satan  to  bring  a  blemifh  upon  the  work  of 
 God  here,  by  introducing  vifionary  fcenes,  imaginary  terrors, 
 and  all  manner  of  mental  diforders  and  delujicns,  in  the  room 
 of  genuine  convictions  of  fin,  and  the  enlightening  influences 
 of  the  bleffed  Spirit;  and  I  was  almofl  refolved  to  declare, 
 that  I  looked  upon  this  to  be  one  of  Satan^s  devices,  and  to 
 raution  my  people  againfi:  it,  and  the  like  cxercifes,  as  fuch. 
 — However,  I  determined  firfr  to  enquire  into  her  knowledge, 
 to  fee  whether  fhe  had  any  jufl  views  of  things,  that  might 
 be  the  occafion  of  her  prefent  diflrcfTmg  concern,  or  whether 
 
 it 
 
AMONG     THE    INDIANS.  3^3 
 
 it  was  a  inere  fright  arifing  only  from  imaginary  terrors.  I 
 aflced  her  divers  queftiuns  reCpefling  man's  primitive,  and 
 more  efpecially  his  prefent  Itate,  and  refpeding  her  own 
 heart ;  which  flie  anlwered  rationally,  and  to  my  furprife. 
 And  I  thought  it  was  next  to  impoflible,  if  not  altogether  io, 
 that  a  Pagan  who  was  become  a  child  through  age,  ihould  in 
 that  ftate  gain  fo  much  knowledge  by  any  mere  human  in- 
 flru(fkion,  without  being  remarkably  enlightened  by  a  divine 
 influence. 
 
 I  then  propofed  to  her  the  provifion  made  in  the  gofpel  for 
 the  falvation  of  finners,  and  the  ability  and  willingnefs  of 
 Chrift  "to  fave  to  the  uttermoO  all  (old  as  well  as  young) 
 *'  that  come  to  him.''  To  which  fhe  feemed  to  give  a  hearty 
 aflbnt.  But  inftantly  replied,  ^*  Ay,  but  I  cannot  come ; 
 "  my  wicked  heart  will  not  come  to  Chrifl;  I  do  not  know 
 "  how  to  come,"  iic.  And  this  ihe  fpoke  in  anguilh  of  Ipi- 
 rit,  ftriking  on  her  bread,  with  tears  in  her  eyes,  and  with 
 fuch  earnejlnefs  in  her  looks  as  was  indeed  piteous  and  affec- 
 ting. 
 
 She  feems  to  be  really  convinced  of  her  fin  and  mifery, 
 and  her  need  of  a  change  of  heart :  and  her  concern  is  abi- 
 ding and  conftant.  So  that  nothing  appears  but  that  this  ex- 
 ercife  may  have  a  faving  iffuc.  And  indeed  it  feems  hopeful, 
 feeing  fhe  is  (a  folicitous  to  obtain  an  interefl  in  Chrifl,  that 
 her  heart  (as  fhe  expreffes  it)  prays  day  and  night. 
 
 How  far  God  may  make  ufe  of  the  imagination  in  awaken- 
 ing fome  perfons  under  theje,  and  fuch  like  circumflances,  I 
 cannot  pretend  to  determine.  Or  whether  this  exercife  I 
 have  given  an  account  of,  be  from  a  div'.ne  influence,  I  fl'ssall 
 leave  others  to  judge.  But  this  I  mufl  fay,  that  its  effcfts 
 hitherto  befpeak  it  to  he  fuch:  nor  can  it  (as  I  fee)  be  ac- 
 counted for,  in  a  rational  way,  but  from  the  influence  of 
 fome  fpirit,  either  good  or  evil.  For  the  woman  I  am  fure, 
 never  heard  divine  things  treated  of  in  the  mamter  flic  now 
 viewed  them  in  ;  and  it  would  feem  flrange  fhe  fliould  get  fuch 
 a  rational  notion  of  them  from  the  mere  working  of  her  own 
 fancy,  without  fome  fuperior,  or  at  leafi:  foreign  aid. — And 
 yet  I  mufl  fay,  I  have  looked  upon  it  as  one  of  the  glories  of 
 this  work  of  grace  among  the  Indians,  and  a  fpecial  e\idcncc 
 of  its  being  from  a  divine  influence,  that  there  has,  till  now, 
 been  no  appearance  of  fuch  things,  no  vifionary  notions, 
 trances,  and  imaginations  intermixed  with  thofe  rational  con- 
 viftions  of  fin,  and  folid  confolations,  that  numbers  have 
 focen  made  the  fubjefts  of.     And  might  I  have  had  my  defirc, 
 
 there 
 
384      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 there  had  been  no  appearance  of  any  thing  of  this  nature  at 
 all. 
 
 December  28.  Difcouifed  to  my  people  in  the  catechetical 
 method  I  lately  entered  upon.  And  in  the  improvement  of 
 my  difcourfe,  wherein  I  was  comparing  man's  prefent  with 
 his  primitive  (late;  and  fhewing  what  he  had  fallen  frcm, 
 and  the  miferies  he  is  now  involved  in,  and  expofed  to  in  his 
 natural  eflate ;  and  pi  effing  finntrs  to  take  a  view  of  their  de- 
 plorable circumftances  without  Chrift;  as  alfo  to  ftrive  that 
 they  might  obtain  an  interefl:  in  him;  the  Lord,  I  truH, 
 granted  a  remarkable  influence  of  his  blefled  Spirit  to  accom- 
 pany what  was  fpoken,  and  there  was  a  great  concern  ap- 
 peared in  the  aflembly:  many  were  melted  into  tears  and 
 fjbs,  and  the  impreffions  made  upon  them  feemed  deep  and 
 heart-affefting.  And  in  particular,  there  were  two  or  three 
 perfons  who  appeared  to  be  brought  to  the  laft  exercifes  of  a 
 preparatory  work,  and  reduced  almoft  to  extremity ;  being  in 
 a  gieat  meafure  convinced  of  the  impoflibility  of  their  help- 
 ing themfelves,  or  of  mending  their  own  hearts ;  and  feemed 
 to  be  upon  the  point  of  giving  up  all  hope  in  themfelves,  and 
 of  venturing  upon  Chrift  as  naked,  helplefs,  and  undone.  And 
 yet  were  in  diftrefs  and  anguifh  becaufe  they  faw  no  lafety  in 
 fo  doing,  unlefs  they  could  do  fornething  towards  laving 
 themfelves. 
 
 One  of  thefe  perfons  was  the  very  aged  woman  above  men- 
 tioned, who  now  appeared  '•  weary  and  heavy  laden"  with  a 
 fenfe  of  her  fin  and  mifery,  and  her  perifliing  need  of  an  inte- 
 reif  in  Chrift. 
 
 Lord's  day,  December  29.  Preached  from  John  iii.  i. — 5. 
 K  number  of  white  people  were  prefent,  as  is  ufual  upon  the 
 Sabbath.  The  difcourfe  was  accompanied  with  power,  and 
 feemed  to  have  z  jUent,  but  deep  and  piercing  influence  upon 
 the  audience,  ^iany  wept  and  fobcd  afTeclionately.  And 
 there  were  fome  tears  among  the  white  people,  as  well  as  the 
 Indians.  Some  could  not  refrain  from  crying  out,  though 
 there  were  not  many  fo  excrcifcd.  But  the  in  preffions  made 
 upon  their  hearts,  appeared  chiefly  by  the  extraordinary 
 earncftnefs  of  their  attention,  and  their  heavy  fighs  and 
 tears. 
 
 After  public  worfhip  was  over,  I  went  to  my  houfe,  pro- 
 pofing  to  preach  again  after  a  fhort  feafon  of  intermiffion. 
 But  they  foon  came  in  one  after  another,  with  tears  in  their 
 eyes,  to  know  "  what  they  fliould  do  to  be  faved.'*  And 
 the  divine  Spirit  in  fuch  a  manner  fct  home  upon  their  hearts 
 svhat  I  fpoke  to  them,  that  the  hcule  was  foon  filled  with 
 
 cries. 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  385 
 
 cries,  and  groans. They  all  flocked  together  upon  this  oc- 
 
 cafion,  and  thole  who.n  1  had  reafjn  to  think  in  a  Chiifllers 
 Hate,  were  aim j  ft  univerlally  feized  with  concern  for  their 
 fouls. 
 
 It  was  an  amazing  feafon  of  power  among  them,  and  Teem- 
 ed as  if  God  had  "  bowed  the  heavens,  and  come  down.'* 
 So  aftonifhingly  prevalent  was  the  operati)n  upon  old  as  well 
 as  young,  that  it  feemed  as  if  none  would  be  left  in  a  fecnrc 
 and  natural  ftate,  bat  that  God  was  now  about  to  convert  all 
 the  world.  And  I  was  ready  to  think  then,  that  I  fhoukl  ne- 
 ver again  defpair  of  the  converlion  of  any  man  or  woman  li- 
 ving, be  they  who  or  what  they  would. 
 
 It  is  impoffiblc  to  give  a  juft  and  lively  defcription  of  the 
 appearance  of  things  at  this  feafon,  at  Icaft  fuch  as  to  con- 
 vey a  bright  and  adequate  idea  of  the  effefts  of  this  influence. 
 A  number  might  now  be  feen  rejoicing  that  God  had  not 
 taken  away  the  powerful  influence  of  his  blefllsd  Spirit  from 
 
 this  place. Refrelhed  to  fee  fo  many  *'  ftriving  to  enter  in 
 
 "  at  the  ftrait  gate;'' — and  animated  with  fuch  concern  for 
 them,  that  they  wanted  "  to  pufli  them  forward,"  as  (ome  of 
 
 them  expreflcd  it. At  the  fame  time  numbers  both  of  men 
 
 and  women,  old  and  young,  might  be  feen  in  tears,  and  fome 
 in  anguifli  of  fpirit,  appearing  in  their  very  countenances,  like 
 condemned  malefaiftors  bound  towards  the  place  of  execu- 
 tion, with  a  heavy  folicitude  fitting  in  their  faces:  fo  that 
 there  feemed  here  (as  I  thought)  a  lively  emblem  of  the  fo- 
 lemn  day  of  accounts:  a  mixture  of  heaven  and  hell;  of  joy 
 unfpeakable,  and  anguifh  inexpt^effible. 
 
 i'he  concern  and  religious  affection  was  fuch,  that  I  could 
 not  pretend  to  have  any  formal  religious  exercife  among  them ; 
 but  fpent  the  time  in  difcourfmg  to  one  and  another,  as  I 
 thought  moft  proper,  and  fealonable  for  each,  and  fometimes 
 addrefled  them  all  together,  and  finally  concluded  with  prayer. 
 
 Such  were  their  circumftances  at  this  feafon,  that  I  could 
 
 fcarce  have  half  an  hour's  reft  from  fpeaking  from  about  half 
 an  hour  before  twelve  o'clock,  (at  which  time  I  began  public 
 worfhip),  till  p-ii{feven  at  night. 
 
 There  appeared  to  be  fjur  or  five  perfons  newly  awakened 
 this  day  and  the  evening  before,  fome  of  whom  but  very  late- 
 ly came  among  us. 
 
 December  30.  Was  vifitcd  by  four  or  five  young  perfons 
 under  concern  for  their  fouls,  moft  of  whom  were  very  lately 
 awakened.  They  wept  much  while  I  difcourfed  to  them, 
 and  endeavoured  to  prefs  upon  them  the  neccliity  oi flying  to 
 Thrift,  without  dchy,  for  falvation. 
 
 3   C  December 
 
386      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 December  31.  Spent  fome  hours  this  day  in  vifiting  n 
 people  from  houfe  to  houfe,  and  converfing  with  them  abouu 
 their  fpiritual  concerns  ;  endeavouring  to  prefs  upon  ChrifHefs 
 fouls  the  ncceffity  of  a  renovation  of  heart:  and  fcarce  left  ;i 
 houfe,  without  leaving  fome  or  other  of  its  inhabitants  in 
 tears,  appearing  folicitoufly  engaged  to  obtain  an  intereft  in 
 Chrifl. 
 
 The  Indians  are  now  gathered  together  from  all  quarters 
 to  this  place,  and  have  built  them  little  cottages,  fo  that  more 
 than  twenty  families  live  within  a  quarter  or  a  mile  of  me. 
 A  very  convenient  fituation  in  regard  both  of  public  and  pri- 
 vate inftrutSlion. 
 
 January  1.  (745-6.  Spent  fome  confiderable  time  in  vifiting 
 my  people  again.  Found  fcarce  one  but  what  was  under  fome 
 ferious  impreflions  rcfpetTting  their  fpiritual  concerns. 
 
 January  2.  Vifited  iome  perfons  newly  come  among  uS;, 
 who  had  fcarce  ever  heard  any  thing  of  Chriftianity  (except 
 the  empty  name)  before.  Endeavoured  to  inftru(^  them  par- 
 ticidarly  in  the  firft  principles  of  religion,  in  the  moft  cafy  and 
 familiar  manner  1  could. 
 
 There  are  Grangers  from  remote  parts  almoft  continually 
 dropping  in  amoncr  us,  fo  that  1  have  occafion  repeatedly  to 
 open  and  inculcate  the  fr/l  principles  of  Chriftianity. 
 
 January  4.  Profecuted  my  catechetical  method  of  inftruft- 
 
 ing. Found  my  people  able  to  anfwer  queftions  with  pro- 
 
 priety,  beyond  what  could  have  been  expcfted  from  perfons 
 fo  lately  brought  out  of  Heathenifh  darknefs. 
 
 In  the  improvement  of  my  difcourfe,  there  appeared  fomp 
 concern  and  afFeftion  in  the  a/Tembly :  and  efpecially  thofe  of 
 whom  I  entertained  hopes  as  being  truly  gracious,  at  leaft  di- 
 vers of  them  were  much  affefted  and  refrefhed. 
 
 Lord's  day,  January  5.  Difcourfed  from  Matth.  xii.  10.  to 
 13.  There  appeared  not  fo  much  livelinefs  and  afFe<flion  in  di- 
 vine fervice  as  ufual.  The  fame  truths  that  have  often  pro- 
 duced many  tears  and  fobs  in  the  affembly,  feemed  now  to 
 have  no  fpecial  influence  upon  any  in  it. 
 
 Near  night  I  propofed  to  have  proceeded  in  my  ufual  me- 
 thod of  catechifing.  But  while  we  were  engaged  in  the  firft 
 pra3'er,  the  power  of  God  feemed  to  defccnd  upon  the  affem- 
 bly in  fuch  a  remarkable  manner,  and  fomany  appeared  under 
 prefling  concern  for  their  fouls,  that  I  thought  it  much  more 
 expedient  to  infift  upon  the  plentiful  provifion  made  by  di- 
 vine grace  for  the  redemption  of  perifhing  Tinners,  and  to 
 profs  them  to  a  fpeee/y  acceptance  of  the  grerJ  falvation,  than 
 to  afk  them  queftions  about  do^rinal  points.     What  was  raoft 
 
 pr  apical, 
 
AMONG     THE    INDIANS.  387 
 
 fraSlkal,  feemed  mofl  feafonable  to  be  infifted  upon,  while 
 numbers  appeared  fo  extraordinarily  felicitous  to  obtain  an  in- 
 tereft  in  the  great  Redeemer. 
 
 Baptized  two  perfons  this  day ;  one  adult  (the  woman  par- 
 ticularly mentioned  in  my  Journal  of  December  22.)  and  one 
 child. 
 
 This  woman  has  difcovered  a  very  fweet  and  heavenly 
 frame  of  mind,  from  time  to  time,  fmce  her  firft  reception  of 
 comfort.  One  morning  in  particular  Ihe  came  to  fee  me,  dif- 
 covering  an  unufual  joy  and  fatisfaftion  in  her  countenance  ; 
 and  when  I  inquired  into  the  reafon  of  it,  fhe  replied,  "  Thct 
 "  God  had  made  her  feel  that  it  was  right  for  him  to  do  what 
 "  he  pleafed  with  all  things ;  and  that  it  would  be  right  if  be 
 "  fhould  caft  her  hulband  and  fon  both  into  hell;  and  fhe  faw 
 "  it  was  fo  right  for  God  to  do  what  he  pleafed  with  them, 
 *'  that  fhe  could  not  but  rejoice  if  God  fhould  fend  them  into 
 ''  hell ;"  though  it  was  apparent  (he  loved  them  Atzx\j. 
 She  moreover  inqirired,  whether  I  was  not  fent  to  preach  to 
 the  Indians,  by  fome  good  people  a  great  way  off.  I  replied. 
 Yes,  by  the  good  people  in  Scotland.  She  anfwered,  that 
 her  heart  loved  thofe  good  people  fo,  the  evening  before, 
 "  that  Ihe  could  fcarce  help  praying  for  them  all  night,  her 
 ^'  heart  would  go  to  God  for  them,"  6r.;  fo  that  "  the  blelf- 
 "  ing  of  thofe  ready  to  perifh  is  like  to  come  upon  thofe 
 "  pious  perfons  who  have  communicated  of  their  fubftance 
 ''  to  the  propagation  of  the  gofpel." 
 
 January  11.  Difcourfed  in  a  catechetical  method,  as  ufual 
 of  late.  And  having  opened  our  firfi  parents  primitive  a- 
 poftacy  from  God,  and  our  fall  in  him;  I  proceeded  to  im- 
 prove my  difcourfe,  by  fhewing  the  necefHty  we  flood  in  of 
 an  almighty  Redeemer,  and  the  abfolute  need  every  fmner 
 has  of  an  intereft:  in  his  merits  and  mediation.  There  was 
 fome  tendernefs  and  affeftionate  concern  appeared  in  the 
 afTembly. 
 
 Lord's  day,  January  12.  Preached  from  If.  Iv.  6.  The 
 word  of  God  feemed  to  fall  upon  the  audience  with  a  divine 
 weight  and  influence,  and  evidently  appeared  to  be  "  not  the 
 "  word  of  man."  The  blefTed  Spirit,  I  am  perfuaded,  ac- 
 companied'what  was  fpoken  to  the  hearts  of  many.  So  that 
 there  was  a  powerful  revival  oi  convicllon  in  numbers  who 
 were  under  f'piritual  exercife  before. 
 
 Toward  night,  catechifed  in  my  ufual  method.  Near  the 
 cloie  of  my  difcourle,  there  appeared  a  great  concern,  and 
 much  affeftion  in  the  audience.    \V"hich  increafed  while  I  con- 
 
 3   C  2  tinued 
 
388      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 tinued  to  invite  them  to  come  to  an  all-fufficient  Redeemer 
 for  eternal  falvation. 
 
 The  Spirit  of  God  feems,  from  time  to  time,  to  be  ftriving 
 with  numbers  of  fouls  here.  They  arc  fo  frequently  and  re- 
 peatedly rouzed,  that  they  feem  unable  at  prelent  to  lull  them- 
 lelves  afleep. 
 
 January  13.  Was  vifited  by  divers  perfons  under  deep  con- 
 cern for  their  fouls;  one  of  whom  was  newly  awakened. — 
 It  is  a  moft  agreeable  work  tv)  treat  with  fouls  who  are  foli- 
 citoully  inquiring  "  what  they  (hall  do  to  be  faved."  And  as 
 we  are  never  to  *'  be  weary  in  well-doing/'  fo  the  obligation 
 feems  to  be  peculiarly  ftrong  when  the  work  is  fo  very  dcfi- 
 rable.  And  yet  I  muft  fay,  my  health  is  fo  much  impaired, 
 and  my  fpirits  fo  wafted  with  my  labours,  and  folitary  manner 
 of  living,  (there  being  no  human  creature  in  the  houfe  with 
 me),  that  their  repeated  and  almoft  inceflant  application  to 
 me  for  help  and  dire^ion,  are  fometimes  exceeding  burden- 
 r)me,  and  fo  exhauft  my  Ipirits,  that  I  become  fit  for  no- 
 thing at  all,  entirely  unable  to  profecute  any  bufinefs  fome- 
 times for  days  together.  And  what  contributes  much  toward 
 this  difficulty  is,  that  I  am  obliged  to  fpcnd  77iuch  time  in  com- 
 municating a  little  matter  to  them ;  there  being  oftentimes 
 m.ny  things  neceftary  to  be  premifcd,  before  I  can  (peak 
 diieftiy  to  what  1  principally  aim  at;  M'hich  things  would  rea- 
 dily be  taken  for  granted,  where  there  was  a  competency  of 
 doftrinal  knowledge. 
 
 January  14.  Spent  fome  time  in  private  conferences  with 
 my  people,  and  found  fome  difpoled   to   take  comfort,  as  I 
 
 thought,  upon  flighty  grounds. They  are  now   generally 
 
 awakened,  and  it  is  become  fo  dirgraceful,*as  well  as  terrify- 
 ing to  the  confcience,  to  be  dtftiti  tc  of  religion,  that  they 
 are  in  eminent  danger  of  taking  up  with  any  cifpearances  of 
 grace,  rather  than  to  live  under  the  fear  and  diigrace  of  an 
 unrcgenerate  ftate. 
 
 January  1 8.  Profecuted  my  catechetical  method  of  difcour- 
 fmg.  iMiere  appeared  a  g'e^it  folemnity,  and  fome  confider- 
 able  afft^tion  in  the  afTembly. 
 
 1  his  method  of  inftrL:6ting  I  find  very  profitable.  When 
 I  firft  cntcrtd  upon  it,  I  was  exercifed  with  fears,  left  my 
 djicourfes  would  unavoidably  be  fo  do^lrinal,  that  they  would 
 tend  only  to  enlighten  the  head,  but  not  to  affcci  the  heart, 
 Eut  the  cveyrt  proves  quite  otherwife;  for  thele  cxercifes  have 
 hitherto  been  lemarkably  blefled  in  the  latter,  as  well  as  the 
 former  refpedls. 
 
 Lord's  day,  Januarj''i9.  Difcourfcd  to  my  people  from  If. 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  389 
 
 jy,  y, — Toward  night  catechifed  in  my  ordinary  method. 
 And  this  appeared  to  be  a  powerful  feafon  ot  grace  among 
 us.  Nu^nbers  were  much  affected. — Conviftions  powerfully 
 revived.  —  Divers  of  the  Chrillians  refiefhed  and  flrengthened. 
 — And  one  weary  heavy  Uden  foul,  I  have  abundant  reaion 
 to  hope,  brougnt  to  true  reft  and  folid  comfort  in  Chrift,  who 
 afterwards  gave  me  fuch  an  account  of  God's  dealing  with  iiis 
 foul,  as  was  abundantly  fatisfying,  as  well  as  refreJJnng  to 
 me. 
 
 He  told  me,  he  had  often  heard  me  fay,  that  perfons  mufl: 
 fee  and/e"f/ themfclves  utterly  helplefs  and  undone;  that  they 
 muft  be  emptied  of  a  dependance  upon  thcmfelves,  and  of  all 
 hope  of  faving  themfelves  by  their  oiy«  doings,  in  order  to 
 their  coming  to  Chrift  for  falvation.  And  he  had  long  been 
 flriving  after  this  view  of  things ;  fuppofing  this  would  be  an 
 excellent  frame  of  mind  to  be  thus  emptied  of  a  dependance 
 upon  his  own  goodncfs  :  that  God  would  have  refpefl  to  this 
 frame,  would  then  be  well  pleafed  with  him,  and  beftow  eter- 
 nal life  upon  him. But  when  he   came   to  feel  him fe If  in 
 
 this  helplefs  undone  condition,  he  found  it  quite  contrary  to 
 all  his  thoughts  and  expectations ;  fo  that  it  M'as  not  the  fame y 
 nor  indeed  any  thing  like  the  frame  he  had  been  feekmg  after. 
 Inftead  of  it^  being  a.  good  frame  of  mind,  he  now  found  no- 
 thing but  badnefs  in  himfelf,  and  faw  it  was  for  ever  impolTiblc 
 for  him  to  make  himfelf  any  better.  He  wondered,  he  laid, 
 that  he  had  ever  hoped  to  mend  his  own  heart,  he  was  a- 
 mazed  he  had  never  before  feen  that  it  was  utterly  impofiible 
 for  him,  by  all  his  contrivances  and  endeavours,  to  do  any 
 thing  that  way,  fmce  the  matter  tioiv   appeared    to  him  in  lo 
 
 clear   a  lig'it.   Inftead  of  imagining  now,  that  God  would 
 
 be  pleafed  with  him  f -r  the  fake  of  this  frame  of  mind,  and 
 this  view  of  his  und^me  eftate,  he  faw  clearly,  and  felt  it  would 
 be  juft  with  God  to  fend  him  to  eternal  mifery ;  and  that 
 there  was  no  goodnefs  in  what  he  then  felt ;  for  he  could  not 
 help  feeing,  that  he  was  naked,  fmful,  and  miferable,  and  there 
 was  nothing  in  fuch  a  fight  to  deferve  God's  love  or  pity. 
 
 He  faw  thefe  things  in  a  manner  fo  clear  and  convincing, 
 that  it  feemed  to  liim,  he  faid,  he  could  convince  every  body 
 of  their  utter  inability  ever  to  help  themfelves,  and  their  un- 
 iv'jrtbnefs  of  any  help  from  God. 
 
 In  th's  frame  of  mind  he  came  to  public  worfhip  this  even- 
 ing, and  while  I  was  inviting  fmners  to  come  to  Chrift  naked 
 and  empty,  without  any  goodncfs  of  their  own  to  recommend 
 them  to  his  acceptance;  then  he  thought  with  himfelf,  that 
 he  had  often  tried  to  come  and  give  up  his  heart  to  Chrift,  and 
 
 he 
 
590      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 he  ufed  to  hope,  that  feme  time  or  other  he  fhould  be  able  to 
 do  lb.  Bui  now  he  was  convinced  he  could  not,  and  it  feem- 
 ed  utterly  vain  for  him  ever  to  try  any  inore :  and  he  could 
 n.jt,  he  laid,  find  a  heart  to  make  any  further  attempt,  be- 
 caul'e  he  faw  it  would  lignify  noiliing  at  all:  nor  did  he  now 
 hope  for  a  better  opportunity,  or  more  ability  hereafter,  as 
 he  bad  formerly  done,  bccaufe  he  faw,  and  was  fully  convin- 
 ced, his  own  ftrength  would  for  ever  fail. 
 
 While  he  was  muling  in  this  manner,  he  faw,  he  faid, 
 with  his  heart  (which  is  a  common  phrafe  among  them)  fome- 
 tliing  that  was  unfpeakably  good  and  lovely,  and  what  he  had 
 never  feen  before;  and  *•  this  ftole  away  his  heart  whether  he 
 *'  would  or  no."  He  did  not,  he  faid,  know  what  it  was  he 
 faw.  He  did  not  fay,  "  this  is  Jefus  Chrift;"  but  it  was  fuch 
 glory  and  beauty  as  he  never  faw  before.  He  did  not  now 
 give  away  his  heart  fo  as  he  had  formerly  intended  and  at- 
 tempted to  do,  but  it  'ivent  away  of  itfelf  zhcv  that  glory  he 
 then  difcovered.  He  ufed  to  try  to  make  a  bargain  with 
 Chrill,  to  give  up  his  heart  to  him,  that  he  might  have  eter- 
 nal life /or  it.  But  now  he  thought  nothing  about  himfelf, 
 or  what  would  become  of  him  hereafter;  but  was  pleafed, 
 and  his  mind  wholly  taken  up  with  the  unfpeakable  excellen- 
 cy of  what  he  then  beheld. 
 
 After  fome  time  he  was  wonderfully  pleafed  with  the  way 
 of  falvation  by  Chrift :  fo  that  it  feemed  unfpeakably  better  to 
 be  faved  altogether  by  the  mere  free  grace  of  God  in  Chrift, 
 
 than  to  have  any  hand  in  Giving  himfelf. And  the  confe- 
 
 quence  of  this  exercife  is,  that  he  appears  to  retain  a  fenfe 
 and  relifh  of  divine  things,  and  to  maintain  a  life  of  feriouf- 
 nefs  and  true  religion. 
 
 January  28.  The  Indians  in  thefe  parts  having  in  times  paft 
 run  themfelves  in  debt  by  their  exceilive  drinking;  and  fume 
 having  taken  the  advantage  of  them,  and  put  them  to  trouble 
 and  charge  by  arrefting  fundry  of  them  ;  whereby  it  was  fup- 
 pofeda  great  body  of  their  hunting  lands  were  much  endan- 
 gered, and. might  fpeedily  be  taken  from  them.  And  1  being 
 i'enfible  that  they  could  not  fublift  together  in  thefe  parts,  in 
 order  to  their  being  a  Chriflian  congregation,  if  thefe  lands 
 ihoLild  drop  out  of  their  hands,  which  was  thought  very  like- 
 ly, thought  it  my  duty  to  ufe  my  utmoll  endeavours  to  pre- 
 vent fo  unhappy  an  event.  And  having  acquainted  the  gentle- 
 men concerned  with  this  miffon  of  this  affair,  according  to 
 the  befl  information  I  could  get  of  it,  they  thought  it  proper 
 ro  expend  the  money  they  had  been,  and  flill  were  collecting 
 for  the  religious  intcrefls  of  the  Indians,  (at  leafl  a  part  of  it), 
 
 for 
 
A  M  O  N  G     T  H  E     1  N  D  I  A  N  S.  391 
 
 for  the  difcharging  of  their  debts,  and  fecuring  of  thefe  lands, 
 that  there  might  be  no  entanglement  lying  upon  them  to  hin- 
 der the  fettlement  and  hopeful  enlargement  of  a  Chrijlion  con- 
 
 gregation  of  Indians  in  thefe  parts. And  having  received 
 
 orders  from  them,  I  anfwered,  in  behalf  of  the  Indians,  Eigh- 
 ty-t^vo  pounds  five /inllings,  New-Jerfey   currency,    at  eight 
 JhiUings  per  ounce  ;  and  fo  prevented  the  danger  of  difficulty 
 in  this  refpedV. 
 
 As  God  has  wrought  a  wonderful  ivork  of  grace  among 
 thefe  Indians,  and  now  inclines  others  from  remote  places  to 
 fall  in  among  them  almoft  continually ;  and  as  he  has  opened 
 a  door  for  the  prevention  of  the  difhculty  now  mentioned, 
 which  feemcd  greatly  to  threaten  their  religious  interefls,  as 
 well  as  worldly  comfort ;  it  is  hopeful  he  defigns  to  eflablilh 
 a  church  for  himfeif  among  them,  and  to  hand  down  true  re- 
 ligion to  then-  pofien'ty. 
 
 January  30.  Preached  to  the  Indians  from  John  iii.  16. 
 17.  There  was  a  folemn  attention  and  fome  afFeftion  vifible 
 in  the  audience ;  efpecially  divers  perfons  who  had  long  been 
 concerned  for  their  fouls,  feemed  afreih  excited  and  engaged 
 in  feeking  after  an  intereft  in  Chrill.  And  one,  with  much 
 concern,  afterwards  told  me,  "  his  heart  was  fo  pricked  with 
 "  my  preaching,  he  knew  not  where  to  turn,  nor  what  to 
 "  do." 
 
 January  31.  This  da}^  the  perfon  I  had  made  choice  of  and 
 engaged  for  z.fchoolniafier  among  the  Indians,  arrived  among 
 
 us,  and  was  heartily  welcomed  by  my  people  univerfally. 
 
 Whereupon  I  diftributed  feveral  dozen  of  primers  among  the 
 children  and  j'oung  people. 
 
 February  i.  1745-6.  My  fchoolmafter  entered  upon  his  bu- 
 
 finefs  among  the  Indians. He  has  generally   about  thirty 
 
 children  and  young  perfons  in  his  fchool  in  the  day-time,  and 
 shout  fifteen  married  people  in  his  evening- fchool.  The  num- 
 ber of  the  latter  fort  of  perfons  being  lefs  than  it  would  be,  if 
 they  could  be  more  conftant  at  home,  and  fpare  time  from 
 their  neceflary  employments  for  an  attendance  upon  thefe  in- 
 ftruftions. 
 
 In  the  evening  catechifed  in  my  ufual  method.  Towards 
 the  clofe  of  my  difcourfe,  a  furprifiag  power  feemed  to  at- 
 tend the  word,  efpecially  to  fome  perfons. —  One  man  confi- 
 derahly  in  years,  who  had  been  a  remarkable  drunkard,  a  con- 
 jurer and  murderer,  that  was  awakened  [on\e  months  before, 
 was  now  brought  to  great  extremity  under  his  Ipiritual  dif- 
 trels,  fo  that  he  trembled  for  hours  together,  and  apprehended 
 himfeif  jufl  dropping  into  hell,  without  any  power  to  refcue 
 
 oc 
 
392      t>IVINE     GRACE    DISPLAYED 
 
 or  relieve  himfelf. — Divers  others  appeared  under  great  con- 
 cern as  well  as   lie,  and  ibiicitous  to  obtain  a  faving  change. 
 
 Lord's  day,  February  i.  Preached  from  John  v.  24.  25. 
 There  appeared  (as  ulual)  fome  concern  and  alfcflion  in  the 
 afl'embly. 
 
 Toward  night  proceeded  in  my  ufuai  method  of  catechifing. 
 Obferved  my  people  more  ready  in  anfwering  the  quertions 
 propofed  to  them  than  ever  before.  It  is  apparent  they  ad- 
 vance daily  in  doSfrinal  knowledge.  But  what  is  ftill  more  de- 
 firable,  the  Spirit  of  God  is  yet  operating  among  them,  where- 
 by exptrimental,  as  well  as  fpsculaiive  knowledge  is  propagated 
 in  their  minds. 
 
 February  5.  Difcourfed  to  a  confiderable  number  of  the 
 Lidians  in  the  evening ;  at  which  time  divers  of  them  appear- 
 ed much  afFefted  and  melted  with  divine  things. 
 
 February  8.  Spent  a  confiderable  part  of  the  day  in  vifiting 
 my  people  from  houfe  to  houfe,  and  converfing  with  them 
 about  their  fouls  concerns.  Divers  perfons  wept  while  I  dif- 
 courfed to  them,  and  appeared  concerned  tor  nothing  fo 
 much  as  for  an  intereft:  in  the  great  Redeemer. 
 
 In  the  evening  catechifed  as  ufual.  Divine  truths  made 
 fome  impreflijn  upon  the  audience,  and  were  attended  with 
 an  afFeftionate  engagement  of  foul  in  fome. 
 
 Lord's  day,  February  9.  Difcourfed  to  my  people  from  the 
 ftory  of  the  blind  man,  Matth.  x.  46. — 52.  1  he  word  of 
 God  feemed  weighty  and  powerful  upon  the  affembly  at  this 
 time,  and  made  confiderable  imprefliuns  upc  n  many ;  divers 
 in  particular  who  have  generally  been  remaikably  ftupid  and 
 carelefs  under  the  means  of  grace,  were  now  awakened,  and 
 wept  affeflionately.  And  the  moft  earneft  attention,  as  well 
 as  tenderncfs  and  affe6^ion,  appeared  in  the  audience  univer- 
 fally. 
 
 Baptized  three  perfons,  two  adults  and  one  child.  The 
 adults,  I  have  reafon  to  hope,  were  both  truly  pious.  There 
 was  a  confiderable  melting  in  the  affembly,  while  I  was  dif- 
 •courfing  particularly  to  tnc  perfons,  and  adminiftering  the  or- 
 dinance. 
 
 God  has  been  pleafed  to  own  and  blefs  the  adminiftration 
 of  this,  as  well  as  of  his  other  ordhmnces,  among  the  Indians. 
 There  are  fome  here  that  have  been  powerfully  awakened  at 
 feeing  others  baptized.  Ar\<\  fome  that  have  obtained  relief 
 and  comfort,  juft  in  the  feafon  when  this  ordinance  has  been 
 adminiftered. 
 
 Toward  night  catechifed.  God  made  this  a  powerful  fea- 
 fon to  fome.     There  were  many  afFefted. Former  con- 
 
 vidlions 
 
AMONG     THE    INDIANS.  393 
 
 virions  appeared  to  be  powerfully  revived.  There  was  like- 
 wife  one,  who  had  been  a  vile  drunkard,  remarkably  awaken- 
 ed.     He  appeared' to  be  in  great  anguifh  of  foul,  wept  and 
 
 tr:;mbled,  and  continued   fo   to  do  till    near  midnight. 
 
 Tiiere  was  alfo  a  poor  heavy  laden  foul,  who  had  been  long 
 un  ier  fpiritual  diArefs,  as  conftant  and  preffing  as  ever  1  faw, 
 that  was  n  )w  brought  to  a  comfortable  calm,  and  feemed  to 
 be  0)\veJ  an  J  rec  )nciled  to  divine  fovereigrtty  ;  and  told  me, 
 "^  She  now  faw  and  felt  it  was  right  God  fh.)uld  do  with  her 
 "  as  he  plea  led.  And  her  hearr  felt  pleafed  and  fati^fied  it 
 *'  (h  mid  be  fo.''  Although  of  late  Jhe  had  often  found  her 
 heart  life  and  quarrel  with  God  becaufehe  would,  'f  he  pUafedy' 
 fend  her  to  heil  after  all  (he  had  done,  or  could  do  to  (a.vc 
 herfelf,  i)c.  And  added,  that  the  heavy  burden  ("he  had  lain 
 under,  was  now  removed:  that  (he  had  tried  to  recover  her 
 concern  and  diftrefs  again,  (fearing  that  the  Spirit  of  God 
 was  departing  from  her,  and  would  leave  her  wholly  carelefs), 
 but  that  (he  could  not  recover  it:  that  (he  felt  (he  never 
 could  do  any  thing  to  fave  herfelf,  but  mufl;  peri(h  for  ever  if 
 Chiift  diJ  n  )t  do  all  for  her:  that  fbe  did  not  deferve  he 
 fhould  help  her  ;  and  that  it  would  be  right  if  he  fhould  leave 
 her  to  p.^iih.  But  Chrift  could  fave  her,  though  (he  could  do 
 nothing  to  fave  herfelf,  6c.     And  here  fhe  feemed  to  reft. 
 
 Forks  of  Delaware  in  Pennfylvania,   1745-6. 
 
 Lord's  day,  February  16.  I  knowing  that  divers  of  the  In- 
 dians in  thofe  parts  were  obftinately  (et  againft  Chriftianicy, 
 and  that  fome  of  them  had  refufed  to  hear  me  preach  in  times 
 part,  thought  it  might  be  proper  and  beneficial  to  the  Chri- 
 ftian  interefl  here,  to  have  a  number  of  my  religious  people 
 from  Crofweekfunk  with  me,  in  order  to  converfe  with  them 
 about  religious  matters  ;  hoping  it  migl:t  be  a  means  to  con- 
 vince them  of  the  truth  and  importance  of  Chrif  ianity,  to  fee 
 and  hear  fome  of  their  own  nation  difcourfing  of  divine 
 things,  and  manifefting  earnefi:  dcfires  that  others  might  be 
 brought  out  of  Heathcnilh  darknefs,  as  themfclves  were. 
 
 And  having  taken  half  a  dozen  of  the  mofl;  fcri  us  and  know- 
 ing perfons  for  this  purpofe,  I  this  day  met  with  them  and 
 the  Indians  of  this  place,  (fundry  of  whom  probably  could 
 not  have  been  prevailed  upon  to  attend  the  meeting,  had  it 
 not  been   for  thcfe   religious  Indians   that  accompanied   me 
 
 bere),  and  preached  to  them. Some  of  them  who  had,  in 
 
 Cimes  paft,  been  extreiviely   avcrfe  to  Chriflianity,  now  be- 
 
 •3  D  haved 
 
394      DIVINE     GRACE    DISPLAYED 
 
 haved  foberly,  and  fome  others  laughed  and  mocked.  Hovf- 
 ever  the  word  of  God  fell  with  fuch  weight  and  power,  that 
 fundry  feemed  to  be  ftunned,  and  exprellcd  a  willingnefs  to 
 "  hear  me'again  of  thefe  matters." 
 
 Afterwards  prayed  with,  and  made  an  addrefs  to  the  white 
 people  prefent,  and  could  not  but  obferve  fome  vifiblc  effects 
 of  the  word,  fuch  as  tears  and  fobs,  among  them. 
 
 After  public  wordiip,  fpent  fome  time  and  took  pains  to 
 convince  thofe  that  mocked,  of  the  truth  and  importance  of 
 what  I  had  been  infixing  upon ;  and  fo  endeavoured  to  a- 
 waken  their  attention  to  divine  truths.  And  had  reafon  to 
 think,  from  what  I  obferved  then  and  afterwards,  that  my 
 endeavours  took  confiderable  efFecl  upon  one  of  the  worft  of 
 them. 
 
 Thofe  few  Indians  then  prefent,  who  ufed  to  be  my  hear- 
 ers in  thefe  parts,  (fome  having  removed  from  hence  to  Crof- 
 weekfung),  feemed  fomewhat  kindly  dilpoied  towatd,  and 
 glad  to  fee  me  again,  although  they  had  been  fo  much  attacked 
 by  fome  of  the  oppofing  Pagans,  that  they  were  almoft  a- 
 fhamed  or  afraid  to  manifeft  their  friendfliip. 
 
 February  17.  After  having  fpent  much  time  in  difcourfmg 
 to  the  Indians  in  their  refpeftive  houfes,  I  got  them  together, 
 and  repeated  and  inculcated  what  I  had  before  taught 
 them. ^ 
 
 Afterwards  difcourfed  to  them  from  Afls  viii.  5.^ — 8.  A 
 divine  influence  feemed  to  attend  the  word.  Sundry  of  the 
 Indians  here  appeared  to  be  fomewhat  awakened,  and  mani- 
 fefted  a  concern  of  mind,  by  their  earneft  attention,  tears  and 
 fobs.  My  people  from  Crofweekfung  continued  with  them 
 day  and  night,  repeating  and  inculcating  the  truths  I  had 
 taught  them :  and  fometimes  prayed  and  fung  pfalms  among 
 them;  difcourfmg  with  each  other,  in  their  hearing,  of  the 
 great  things  God  had  done  for  thejn,  and  for  the  Indians 
 from  whence  they  came :  which  feemed  (as  my  people  told 
 me)  to  take  more  effect  upon  them,  than  when  they  directed 
 their  difcourfes  immediately  to  them. 
 
 February  18.  Preached  to  an  aflembly  of  Irilh  people  nea? 
 fifteen  miles  diftant  from  the  Indians. 
 
 February  19.  Preached  to  the  Indians  again,  after  having 
 fpent  confiderable  time  in  converfmg  with  them  more  private- 
 ly. There  appeared  a  great  folemnit}',  and  fome  concern 
 and  affeftion  among  the  Indians  belonging  to  thefe  parts,  as 
 
 well  as  a  fweet  melting  among  thofe  who  came  with  me. 
 
 Divers  of  the  Indians  here  feemed  to  have  their  prejudices 
 
 and 
 
AMONG     THE    INDIANS.  395 
 
 and  aveifion  to  Chriftianity  removed,  and  appeared  well  dif^ 
 pofed  and  inclined  to  hear  the  word  of  God. 
 
 February  20.  Preached  to  a  fmall  afTembly  of  High-Dutch 
 people,  who  had  feldom  heard  the  gofpel  preached,  and  were 
 (fome  of  them  at  leaft)  very  ignorant ;  but  have  divers  of  them 
 lately  been  put  upon  an  inquiry  after  the  way  of  falvation, 
 with  fome  thoughtfulnefs.  They  gave  wonderful  attention, 
 and  fome  of  them  were  much  affedted  under  the  word,  and 
 afterwards  faid,  (as  I  was  informed),  that  they  never  had  been 
 fomuch  enlightened  about  the  way  of  falvation  in  their  whole 
 lives  before.  They  requeftcd  me  to  tarry  with  them,  or 
 come  again  and  preach  to  them.  And  it  grieved  me  that  I 
 could  not  comply  with  their  requeft,  for  I  could  not  but  be 
 afFe£led  with  their  circumftances ;  they  being  as  "  fhecp  not 
 *'  having  a  fhepherd,"  and  fome  of  them  appearing  under 
 fome  degree  of  foul-trouble,  ftanding  in  peculiar  need  of  the 
 affiftance  of  an  experienced  (^'n'MuA  guide. 
 
 February  21.  Preached  to  a  number  of  people,  many  of, 
 them  Low-Dutch.  Sundry  of  the  fore-mentioned  High-Dutch 
 attended  the  fermon,  though  eight  or  ten  miles  diflant  from  • 
 
 their  houfes. Divers  of  the  Indians  alfo  belonging  to  thefe 
 
 parts,  came  of  their  own  accord  with  my  people  (from  Crof- 
 weekfung)  to  the  meeting.  And  there  were  two  in  particular, 
 who,  the  laft  Sabbath,  oppofed  and  ridiculed  Chriflianity, 
 that  were  now  prefent  and  behaved  foberly.  May  the  pre- 
 fent  encouraging  appearance  continue. 
 
 February  22.  Preached  to  the  Indians.  They  appeared 
 more  free  from  prejudice,  and  more  cordial  to  Chriftianity 
 than  before.  And  fome  of  them  appeared  aifefted  with  di- 
 vine truths. 
 
 Lord's  day,  February  23.  Preached  to  the  Indians  from 
 John  vi.  35. — 37. — After  public  fervice,  difcourfed  particu- 
 larly with  fundry  of  them,  and  invited  them  to  go  down  to 
 Crofweekfung,  and  tarry  there  at  leaft  for  fome  time  ;  know- 
 ing they  would  then  be  free  from  the  fcoiFs  and  temptations 
 of  the  oppofing  Pagans,  as  well  as  in  ike  xvay  of  hearing  di- 
 vine truths  difcourfed  of,  both  in  public  and  private.  And 
 got  a  promife  of  fome  of  them,  that  they  would  fpcedily  pay 
 us  a  vi  fit,  and  attend  fome  further  inflruftions.  They  Teem- 
 ed to  be  confiderably  enlightened,  and  much  frfred,from  their 
 prejudices  againfl:  Chriftianity^  But  it  is  much  to  be  feared 
 their  prejudices  will  revive  again,  unlefs  they  could  enjoy  the 
 means  of  inftruftion  here,  or  be  removed  where  they  might 
 be  under  fuch  advantages,  and  out  of  the  way  of  their  Pagan 
 acquaintance. 
 
 3  D  2  Crofweekfunj 
 
19^      DIVINE     GRACE    DISPLAYED 
 
 Crofweekfung  in  New  Jerfey,  1745-6. 
 
 March  i.  Catcchifjd  in  my  ordinary  method.  Was  plea- 
 fcd  and  refrefhed  to  iee  themanfwer  the  queftions  propolcj  to 
 them  with  fuch  remarkable  rcadinefs,  dilcitiion,  and  Know- 
 ledge. 
 
 Toward  the  clofc  of  my  difcourfe,  divine  truths  made  c(  n- 
 Uderable  imprcHi  nr.  upon  the  audience,  and  produced  tars 
 an  1  lobs  in  fo.ne  under  concern;  and  more  efpcci  lly  a  lucit 
 a;id  humble  melting  in  fundry  that,  I  have  rcaion  to  hope, 
 were  truly  gracious. 
 
 Lord's  day,   March  2.  Preached  from  John  xv.  1. — 6. 
 
 The  aflembly  appeared  not  fo  lively  in  their  attention  ai.  ufnal, 
 nor  fo  much  atFc^led  wifh  divine  tiuths  in  general  a!>  has  btcn 
 common. 
 
 Some  of  my  people  who  went  up  to  the  Forks  of  Delaware 
 with  me,  being  now  rcti'rned,  were  accompanied  b)  two  of 
 the  Indians  belonging  to  the  Forks,  who  had  promiltd  n^e  a 
 fpeedy  vifxt.  JV]ay  the  Lord  meet  with  them  here.  1  hey 
 can  fcarce  go  into  a  houfe  now,  but  they  will  meet  with  C'hri- 
 ilian  converfation,  whereby,  it  is  hopetul,  they  may  be  bi  th 
 Jnftru(fled  and  awakened. 
 
 Difcourfed  to  the  Indians  again  in  the  afternoon,  and  cb- 
 ferved  among  them  fome  livelinefs  and  engagement  in  divine 
 fervice,  though  not  equal  to  what  has  often  appeared  here. 
 
 I  know  of  no  affembly  of  Chriftians,  where  there  feems  to 
 be  fo  much  of  the  prefence  of  God,  where  brotherly  love  fo 
 much  prevails,  and  where  I  fhould  take  fo  much  delight  in 
 the  public  worfliip  of  God,  in  the  general,  as  in  my  oivri  con- 
 ^regat'ion:  although  not  more  than  nine  months  ygo,  they 
 Mere  worfliipping  dtvils  and  dumb  idols  under  the  power  of 
 P  ^gan  dai  knels  and  fuperflition.  Amazing  change  thlb  I  efftfled 
 by  nothing  lefs  than  divine  power  and  grace!  "This  is  the 
 *'  doing  of  the  Lord,  and  it  is  juftly  marvellous  in  our  eyes! 
 
 Aiarch  5.  Spent  fome  time  juft  at  evening  in  prayer,  iing- 
 ing,  and  difcourfing  to  my  people  upon  divine  things;  and  ob- 
 fervcd  fome    agreeable  tendcrncfs  and  afFeftion  among  them. 
 
 Their  prefent  fituation  is  fo  compact  and  commodious, 
 that  they  are  eafily  and  quickly  called  together  with  only  the 
 found  o^  a  Conk-fhell,  (a  fliell  like  that  of  a  Perwinkle),  fo 
 that  tbey  have  frequent  opportunities  of  attending  religious 
 exercifcs  publicly ;  which  Icems  to  he  a  great  means,  under 
 
 God, 
 
AMONG    THE     INDIANS.  .397 
 
 God,  of  keeping  alive  the  impreffions  of  divine  things  in  their 
 minds. 
 
 March  8.  Catechifed  in  the  evening.  My  people  anfwered 
 the   queflions  propofed  to  them  well.     I  can  perceive  their 
 
 knowledge  in  religion  increafes  daily. A&d  what   is  dill 
 
 m  >re  delirable,  the  divine  influence  that  has  been  fo  remaik- 
 able  among  them,  appears  ftill  to  continue  in  fome  good  mea- 
 fure.  The  divine  piefence  feemed  to  be  in  the  alTembly  this 
 evening.  S  >me,  who  1  have  good  reafon  to  think  are  Chri- 
 llians  indeed,  were  m^lteJ  with  a  fenfe  of  the  divine  goodnefs, 
 ani  thtir  own  barrenneis  an  J  ingra'"itude,  and  Teemed  to  hate 
 
 thernfekieSy  as  one  of  ti  em  afterwards  expreflcd  it. Con- 
 
 viftions  alfo  appeared  to  be  revived  in  feveral  inftances;  and 
 divine  truths  were  attended  with  fuch  influence  upon  the  af- 
 fembly  in  general,  that  it  might  jullly  be  called,  "an  evening 
 *'  of  divine  power." 
 
 Lord's  day,  March  9.  Preached  from  Luke  x.  38. — 42. — ■ 
 The  word  of  God  was  attended  with  power  and  energy  upon 
 the  audienc.  Numbers  were  atfefted  and  concerned  to  ob- 
 tain the  one  thing  needful.  And  fundry  that  have  given  good 
 evidences  of  being  truly  gracious,  were  much  affefted  with  a 
 fenfe  of  their  want  of  fpirituality  ;  and  faw  the  need  they 
 Hood  in  of  grow' ng  -n  grace.  And  moft  that  had  been  under 
 any  imprelhons  ot  divine  things  in  times  pad,  feemed  now  to 
 have  thole  impreflions  revived. 
 
 In  the  afternoon  propofed  to  have  catechifed  in  my  ufual 
 method.  But  while  we  were  engaged  in  the  fii  fl  prayer  in 
 the  Indian  language,  (as  ufual),  a  great  part  of  the  affembly 
 was  fo  much  moved,  and  affefted  with  divine  things,  that  I 
 thought  it  feafonable  and  proper  to  omit  the  pr;  pofmg  of 
 queflions  for  that  time,  and  infill  upon  the  moll  practical 
 truths.  And  accordingly  did  fo;  making  a  further  improve- 
 ment of  the  pafl"age  of  fcripture  I  difcourfed  upon  m  the 
 former  part  of  the  day. 
 
 There  appeared  to  be  a  powerful  divine  influence  in  the 
 congregation.  Sundry  that  I  have  reafon  to  think  are  truly 
 pious,  were  fo  deeply  affciTled  with  a  fenfe  of  their  own  bar- 
 rennefs,  and  their  unworthy  treatment  of  the  blelfed  Redeem- 
 er, that  they  lonkcd  on  h'nn  as  pierced  by  thcmfclve^,  and 
 mourned,  yea,  fome  of  them  were  in  b/tternefs  as  for  a  f.  fl- 
 horn. — Some  poor  awakened  linneis  alfo  appeared  to  be 
 in  anguifh  of  foul  to  obtain  an  interefl:  in  Chrift.  So  that 
 there  was  a  great  mourn'ng  in  the  afl'embly :  many  heavy 
 groans,  fobs,  and  tears !  and  one  or  two  pcrfons  newly  come 
 ^mong  us,  were  confiderabiy  awakened. 
 
 Methinks 
 
398      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 Methinks  it  would  have  refreflied  the  heart  of  any  who 
 truly  love  Zion's  intereft,  to  have  been  in  the  midft  of  this 
 divine  influence,  and  feen  the  effects  of  it  upon  faints  and  fin- 
 ners.  The  place  of  divine  worfhip  appeared  both  foUmn  and 
 Jweet!  and  was  fo  endeared  by  a  dilplay  of  the  divine  prefencc 
 and  grace,  that  thofe  who  had  any  relifli  of  divine  things, 
 could  not  but  cry,  "  How  amiable  are  thy  tabernacles,  O  Lord 
 "  of  hofls!" 
 
 After  public  worfhip  was  over,  numbers  came  to  my  houfe, 
 where  we  fang  and  difcourfed  of  divine  things;  and  the  pro- 
 fence  of  God  feemed  here  alfo  to  be  in  the  midft  of  us. 
 
 While  we  were  finging,  there  was  one  (the  woman  men- 
 tioned in  my  Journal  of  1:  ebruary  9.)  who,  I  may  venture  to 
 fay,  if  I  may  be  allowed  to  fay  fo  much  of  any  perfon  I  ever 
 faw,  was  "filled  with  joy  unfpeakable  and  full  ofglory,^ 
 and  could  not  but  burft  forth  in  prayer  and  praifes  to  God  be- 
 fore us  all,  with  many  tears,  crying  fometimes  in  Englifh 
 and  fometimes  in  Indian,  "  O  bleffed  Lord,  do  come,  do 
 *'  come !  O  do  take  me  away,  do  let  me  die  and  go  to  Jefus 
 "  ChriftI  I  am  afraid  if  I  live  I  fhall  fin  again !  O  do  let  me 
 "  die  now!  O  dear  Jefus,  do  come!  1  cannot  ftay,  I  cannot 
 *'  ftay  !  O  how  can  I  live  in  this  world !  do  take  my  foul  a- 
 '*  way  from  this  finful  place !  O  let  me  never  fin  any  more ! 
 *'  O  what  ihall  I  do,  what   fhall   I   do !  dear   Jefus,  O   dear 
 
 "  Jefus,"  <6c. In  this  ecftafy  fhe  continued  fome  time, 
 
 uttering  thefe  and  fuch  like  expreffions  inceffantly. — And 
 the  grand  argument  fhe  ufed  with  God  to  take  her  away 
 immediately,  was,  that  "  if  fhe  lived,  fhe  fhould  fin  againft 
 «  him." 
 
 When  fhe  had  a  little  recovered  herfelf,  I  afked  her,  if 
 Chrift  was  not  now  fweet  to  her  foul?  Whereupon,  turning 
 to  me  with  tears  in  her  eyes,  and  with  all  the  tokens  of  deep 
 liumiiity  I  ever  faw  in  any  perfon,  fhe  faid,  "  I  have  many 
 "  times  heard  you  fpeak  of  the  goodnefs  and  the  fweetnefs 
 '*  of  Chrift,  that  he  was  better  than  all  the  world.  But  O  ! 
 "  I  knew  nothing  what  you  meant,  1  never  believed  you !  I 
 *'  never  believed  you  !  But  now  I  know  it  is  true !"  Or  words 
 to  that  effeft. — I  anfwered.  And  do  you  fee  enough  in  Chrift 
 for  the  greateft  of  finners?  She  replied,  "O!  enough,  c- 
 **  nough !  for  all  the  finrers  in  the  world  if  they  v/ould  but 
 "  come."  And  when  I  afked  her,  if  fhe  could  not  tell  them 
 of  the  goodnefs  of  Chrift;  turning  herfelf  about  to  fome  poor 
 Chriftlcfs  fouls  who  ftood  by,  and  were  much  affefted,  fhe 
 faid,  "  O !  there  is  enough  in  Chrift  for  you,  if  you  would 
 *^  but  come !  O  ftrive,  ftrive  to  give  up  your  hearts  to  him  1" 
 
 oc.-— 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  399 
 
 <irc. — And  upon  hearing  fomething  of  the  glory  of  heaven 
 mentioned,  that  there  was  no  lin  in  that  world,  6c.  fhc 
 again  fell  into  the  fame  ccftafy  of  joy,  and  defire  of  Chrift's 
 coming;  repeating  her  former  exprelfions,  "  O  dear  Lord, 
 *'  do  let  me  go !  O  what  (hall  I  do,  what  (hall  I  do !  I  want 
 "  to  go  to  Chrift !  I  cannot  live  !   O  do  let  me  die  !"  6c. 
 
 She  continued  in  this  fweet  frame  for  more  than  two  hours, 
 before  llie  was  well  able  to  get  home. 
 
 I  am  very  fenfible  there  may  be  great  joys  arifmg  even  to 
 an  ecftafy,  where  there  is  ftill  no  fubftantial  evidence  of  their 
 being  well-grounded.  But  in  the  prefent  cafe  there  feemed  to 
 be  no  evidence  wanting,  in  order  to  prove  this  joy  to  be  di- 
 vine, either  in  regard  of  its  preparatives,  attendants,  or  con- 
 fequcnts. 
 
 Of  all  the  perfons  I  have  feen  under  fpiritual  exercife,  I 
 fcarce  ever  faw  one  appear  more  bowed  and  broken  under 
 conviflions  of  fm  and  mifery  (or  what  is  ufually  called  a  pre-- 
 paratory  ivork)  than  this  woman.  Nor  fcarce  any  who  feem- 
 en  to  have  a  greater  acquaintance  with  her  own  heart  than  fhe 
 had.  She  would  frequently  complain  to  me  of  the  hardnefs 
 and  rebellion  of  her  heart.  Would  tell  me,  her  heart  rofe 
 and  quarrelled  with  God,  when  fhe  thought  he  would  do  with 
 her  as  he  pleafed,  and  fend  her  to  hell  notwithflanding  her 
 prayers,  good  frames,  6c.  That  her  heart  was  not  willing  10 
 conae  to  Chrift  for  falvation,  but  tried  every  where  elle  for 
 help. 
 
 And  as  flie  feemed  to  be  remarkably  fenfible  of  her  flub- 
 bornnefs  and  contrariety  to  God,  under  convii5lion,  fo  flie 
 appeared  to  be  no  lefs  remarkably  bowed  and  reconciled  to 
 dWme  fovereignty  before  fhe  obtained  any  relief  or  comfort. 
 Something  of  which  I  have  before  noticed  in  my  Journal  of 
 February  9.  Since  which  time  fhe  has  feemed  conftantly  to 
 breathe  the  fpirit  and  temper  of  the  new  creature  :  crying 
 after  Chrifl,  not  through  fear  of  hell  as  before,  but  with 
 ftrong  defires  after  him  as  her  only  fatisfying  portion ;  and 
 has  many  times  wept  and  fobbed  bitterly,  becaufe  (as  fhe  ap- 
 prehended) fhe  did  not  and  could  not  love  him. — When  I  have 
 fometimes  aflced  her.  Why  fhe  appeared  fo  forrowful,  and 
 ■whether  it  was  becaufe  fne  was  afraid  of  hell?  She  would  an- 
 fwer,  "  No,  I  be  not  diflreffed  about  that ;  but  my  heart  is 
 *'  fo  wicked  I  cannot  love  Chrift  ;"  and  thereupon  burft  out 
 into  tears. — But  although  this  has  been  the  habitual  frame  of 
 her  mind  for  feveral  weeks  together,  fo  that  the  exercife  of 
 grace  appeared  evident  to  others,  yet  Jhe  feemed  wholly  in- 
 
 fenlible 
 
400      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 fenfible  of  it  herfelf,  and  never  had  any  remarkable  comfort, 
 and  fenfible  fitis faction  till  this  evening. 
 
 This  fweet  and  furprifmg  ecftafy,  appeared  to  fpring  from 
 a  true  fpiritual  dirc(jvery  of  the  glory,  ravifliing  beauty  and 
 excellency  of  Chrift:  and  not  from  any  gro/s  imaginary  no- 
 tions of  his  human  nature;  fuch  as  that  of  feeing  him  mfuch 
 a  place  or  pofture,  as  hanging  on  the  crofs,  as  bleeding,  dy- 
 ing, as  gently  fmiling,  and  the  like  ;  which  delufions  fome 
 have  been  carried  away  with.  Nor  did  it  rife  from  a  ford'idy 
 felfiOd  apprehenlion  of  her  having  any  benefit  whatfoever  con- 
 ferred on  her,  but  from  a  view  of  his  perfonal  excellency,  and 
 tranfctndent  loveiinefs,  which  drew  forth  thofe  vehement  dc- 
 fires  of  enjoying  him  ftie  now  manifefted,  and  made  her  long 
 "  to  be  abfent  from  the  body,  that  fhe  might  be  prefent  with 
 "  the  Lord." 
 
 The  attendants  of  this  ravifliing  comfort,  were  fuch  as  a- 
 bundantly  difcovered  its  fpring  to  be  divine,  and  that  it  was 
 
 truly  a  "joy  in  the  Holy  Ghoft." Novj  flie  viewed  divine 
 
 truths  as  living  realities  ;  and  could  fay,  "  I  know  thefe  things 
 
 *'  are  fo,   I  feel  they  are  truel" No-w  her  foul  was  refign- 
 
 cd  to  the  divine  will  in  the  moft  tender  points ;  fo  that  when 
 I  faid  to  her.  What  if  God  fhould  take  away  your  *  hulband 
 from  you,  (who  was  then  very  lick),  how  do  you  think  you 
 could  bear  that?   She  replied,  "  He  belongs  to  God,  and  not  to 
 
 "  me;  he  may  do  with  him  juft  what  he  plcafes." No-w  fhe 
 
 had  the  moft  tender  fenfe  of  the  evil  of  fm,  and  difcovered 
 the  Htmoft  averfion  to  it ;  longing  to  die  that  fhe  might  be  de- 
 livered from  it. Novj  Ihe  could   freely  trufl  her  all  with 
 
 God  for  time  and  eternity.  And  when  I  queried  with  her, 
 how  fhe  could  be  willing  to  die,  and  leave  her  little  infant; 
 and  what  fhe  thought  would  become  of  it  in  cafe  fhe  fliould? 
 She  anfwered,  "  God  will  take  care  of  it.     It  belongs  to  him, 
 
 "  he  will  take  care  of  it." Now  fhe  appeared  to  have  the 
 
 moft  humbling  fenfe  of  her  own  meannefi:  and  unworthinefs, 
 her  weaknefs  and  inability  to  preferve  herfelf  from  fm,  and 
 to  perfevere  in  the  way  of  hoiinefs,  crying,  "  if  I  live,  I 
 "  fhall  fm."  And  I  then  thought  I  had  never  feen  fuch  an 
 appearance  of  ecflafy  and  humility  meeting  in  any  one  perfon 
 in  all  my  life  before. 
 
 The  confequents  of  this  joy  are  no  lefs  defirable  and  fatif- 
 f.  riory  than  its  attendants.  She  fince  appears  to  be  a  moft 
 tender,  broken-hearted,  affeflionate,  devout,  and  humble 
 Chriftian,  as  exemplary  in  life  and  converfation  as  any  perfon 
 
 *  The  man  particularly  mentioned  in  my  Journal  of  ^nuary  19. 
 
 ii« 
 
AMONG     THE    INDIANS^  40I 
 
 in  my  congregation.     May  ihe  ftill  "  grow  in  grace,  and  in 
 "  the  knowledge  of  Chrili" 
 
 March  10.  Toward  night  the  Indians  met  together  of 
 their  own  accord,  and  fang,  prayed,  and  difcourfed  of  divine 
 things  among  themfelves.  At  which  time  there  was  much 
 affection  among  them.  Some  who  are  hopefully  gracious, 
 appeared  to  be  melted  with  divine  things.     And  forne  others 
 
 feemed  much  concerned  for  their  fouls. Perceiving  their 
 
 engagement  and  affection  in  religious  exercifes,  J  went  a- 
 mong  them,  and  prayed,  and  gave  a  word  of  exhortation ; 
 and  obferved  two  or  three  fomewhat  affected  and  concerned, 
 who  fcarce  ever  appeared  to  be  under  any  religious  impref- 
 fions  before.  It  feemed  to  be  a  day  and  evening  of  divine 
 power.  Numbers  retained  the  warm  impreffions  of  divine 
 things  that  had  been  made  upon  their  minds  the  day  before. 
 March  14.  Was  viflted  by  a  confiderable  number  of  my 
 people,  and  fpent  fome  time  in  religious  exercifes  with  them.. 
 March  15.  In  the  evening  caiechifed.  My  people  anfwer- 
 cd  the  queftions  put  to  them  with  furprifing  readinefs  and 
 judgment.  There  appeared  fome  warmth  and  feeling  fenfe 
 of  divine  things  among  thofe,  I  have  reafbn  to  hope,  are 
 real  Chriftians,  while  I  was  difcourfing  upon  "peace  of  con- 
 *'  fcience,  and  joy  in  the  Holy  Ghoil."  Thefe  feemed  quick- 
 ened and  enlivened  in  divine  fervice,  though  there  was  not  fo 
 much  appearance  of  concern  among  thofe  I  have  reafon  to 
 think  in  a  Chriftlefs  ftate. 
 
 Lord's  day,  March  16.  Preached  to  my  congregation  from 
 Heb.  ii.  i. — 3.  Divine  truths  feemed  to  have  Tome  confider- 
 able influence  upon  many  of  the  hearers ;  and  produced  many 
 tears,  as  well  as  heavy  fighs  and  fobs  among  both  thofe  who 
 have  given  evidences  of  being  real  Chriftians,  and  others  alfo. 
 And  the  impreffions  made  upon  the  audience,  appeared  in 
 general  deep  and  heart-affefting,  not  fuperficial,  noify,  and 
 affefted. 
 
 Toward  night  difcourfed  again  on  the  great  falvation.  The 
 
 word  was  again  attended  with  fome  power  upon  the  audience. 
 
 Numbers  wept  affectionately,  and,  to  appearance,  uttfeigncd- 
 
 ly ;  fo  that  the  Spirit  of  God  feemed  to  be  moving  upon  the 
 
 face  of  the  afifembly. 
 
 Baptized  the  vjoman  particularly  mentioned  in  my  Journal 
 of  laft  Lord's  day  ;  who  now,  as  well  as  then,  appeared  to  be 
 in  a  devout,  humble,  and  excellent  frame  of  mind. 
 
 My  houle  being  thronged  with  my  people  in  the  evening, 
 •  I  fpent  the  time  in  religious  exercifes  with  them,  till  my  na- 
 ture was  almoft  fpent. They  are  fo  unv/earicd  in  religious 
 
 3    £  exercifes, 
 
4o2     DIVINE    GRACE    DISPLAYED 
 
 excrcifcs,  and  unfatiable  in  their  thir fling  after  Chrljlian 
 kno-ivledge,  that  I  can  lometiraes  fcarce  avoid  labouring  to,  as 
 greatly  to  exhauft  my  ftrength  and  (pirits. 
 
 March  ig.  Sundry  of  the  pcrfons  that  went  with  me  tff 
 the  Forks  of  Delaware  in  February  lafl,  having  been  detained 
 there  by  the  dangerous  ilinefs  of  one  of  their  company,  re- 
 turned home  but  this  day.  Whereupon  my  people  generally 
 met  together  of  their  own  accord,  in  order  to  fpend  fomc 
 time  in  religious  exercifes;  and  in  fpecial  to  give  thanks  to 
 God  for  his  preferving  goodnefs  to  thofe  who  had  been  abfcnt 
 from  them  for  feveral  weeks,  and  recovering  mercy  to  him 
 that  had  been  fick ;  and  that  he  had  now  returned  them  all  in 
 fafefy.  1  being  then  abfent,  they  delired  my  fchoolmafter 
 to  alTift  them  in  carrying  on  their  religious  folemnity ;  who 
 tells  me  they  appeared  engaged  and  affeftionate  in  repeated 
 prayer,  finging,  dc. 
 
 March  22.  Catechifed  in  my  ufual  method  in  the  evening.— 
 My  people  anfwered  queftions  to  my  great  fatisfaciiion. 
 There  appeared  nothing  very  remarkable  in  the  aflembly. 
 confidering  what  has  been  common  among  us.  Although  I 
 may  juftly  fay,  the  flrift  attention,  the  tendernefs  and  affec- 
 tion, the  many  tears,  and  heart-affefling  fobs  appearing  in 
 numbers  in  the  aflembiy  would  have  been  very  remarkable^ 
 Were  it  not  that  God  has  made  thefe  things  common  with  us, 
 and  even  with  Jirangers  foon  after  their  coming  among  us, 
 from  lime  to  time.  Although  I  am  far  from  thinking  that 
 every  appearance,  znA  particular  inftance  of  affection,  that 
 has  been  among  us,  has  been  truly  genuine,  and  purely  from  a 
 divine  influence.  I  am  fenfible  of  the  contrary  ;  and  doubt 
 not,  but  that  there  has  been  fome  corrupt  mixtures,  fome 
 chafFaswcll  as  wheat,  efpecially  fmce  religious  concern  be- 
 came fo  common  and  prevalent  here. 
 
 Lord's  day,  March  23.  There  being  about  fifteen y?rj«^rr/, 
 adult  perfons,  come  among  us  in  the  rueek  paft ;  divers  of  whom 
 had  never  been  in  any  religious  meeting  till  now,  I  thought  it 
 proper  to  difcourfe  this  day  in  a  manner  peculiarly  fuited  to 
 their  circumflances  and  capacities :  and  accordingly  attempt- 
 ed it  from  Hof.  xiii.  9. ;  in  the  forenoon  opening  in  the  plain- 
 efi:  manner  I  could,  man's  apoftacy  and  ruined  ftatc,  after  ha- 
 ving fpoken  fome  things  refpefting  the  being  and  perfeftions 
 of  God,  and  his  creation  of  man  in  a  flate  of  uprightnefs  and 
 happinefs.  In  the  afternoon,  endeavoured  to  open  the  glo- 
 lious  piovifion  God  has  made  for  the  redemption  of  apoflate 
 creatures,  by  giving  his  own  dear  Son  to  fuller  for  them,  and 
 fatisfy  divine  juftice  on  their  behalf^ 
 
 There 
 
AMONG    THE    INDIANS.  403 
 
 There  was  not  that  afFeftion  and  concern  in  the  afTembly 
 that  has  been  common  among  us,  although  there  was  a  defi- 
 rabJc  attention  appearing  in  general,  and  even  m  moft  of  the 
 Grangers. 
 
 Near  fun-fet  I  felt  an  uncommon  concern  upon  my  mind, 
 efpecialiy  for  the  ^ooy grangers,  that  God  had  fo  much  viith- 
 held  his  prefence,  and  the  powerful  influence  of  his  Spirit, 
 from  the  aflrmbly  in  the  exercifes  of  the  day ;  and  thereby 
 denied  them  of  that  matter  of  conviftion  which  I  hoped  they 
 might  have  had.  And  in  this  frame  I  vifitcd  fundry  houfes, 
 and  difcourfed  with  fome  concern  and  afFeftion  to  divers  per- 
 fons  particularly ;  but  without  much  appearan^ce  of  fuccefs, 
 till  1  came  to  a  houfe  where  divers  of  the  ftrangers  were;  and 
 there  the  folemn  truths  I  difcourfed  of  appeared  to  take  ejfeii, 
 firft  upon  fome  children,  then  upon  divers  adult  perfons  that 
 had  been  fomewhat  awakened  before,  and  afterwards  upon 
 feveral  of  the  'Pa.gzxv grangers. 
 
 I  continued  my  difcourfe,  with  fome  fervency,  till  almofir 
 every  one  in  the  houfe  was  melted  into  tears ;  and  divers  wept 
 aloud,  and  appeared  earneftly  concerned  to  obtain  an  intcreft 
 in  Chrift.  Upon  this,  numbers  foon  gathered  from  all  the 
 houfes  round  about,  and  fo  thronged  the  place,  that  we  were 
 obliged  to  remove  to  the  houfe  where  we  ufually  meet  for 
 public  worfliip.  And  the  congregation  gathering  immediate- 
 ly, and  many  appearing  remarkably  affefted,  I  difcourfed 
 fome  time  from  Lukexix.  10.  Endeavouring  to  open  the  mer- 
 cy, companion,  and  concern  of  Chrift  for  IcJ},  helplefsf  and 
 undone  finners. 
 
 There  was  much  vifible  concern  and  afFeflion  in  the  aflem- 
 bly ;  and  I  doubt  not  but  that  a  divine  influence  accompanied 
 what  was  fpoken  to  the  hearts  of  many.  There  were  five  or 
 £\\o(  the  fit  angers  (men  and  women)  who  appeared  to  be  con- 
 fiderable  awakened.  And  in  particular  one  very  rugged  young 
 man,  who  feemed  as  if  nothing  would  move  him,  was  now 
 brought  to  tremble  like  the  jailor,  and  weep  for  a  long 
 time. 
 
 The  Pagans  that  were  awakened  feemed  at  once  to  put  off 
 their  favoge  roughnefs  and  Pagan  manners,  and  became  fo- 
 ciable,  orderly,  and  humane  in  their  carriage.  Vv'hen  ihcy  fifft 
 came,  I  exhorted  my  religious  people  to  take  pains  v  ith  them 
 (as  they  had  done  with  other  ftrangers  from  time  to  time)  to 
 inftruft  them  in  Chriftianity.  But  when  fome  of  them  at- 
 tempted fomething  of  that  nature,  the  ftrangers  would  foon 
 rife  up  and  walk  to  other  houfes,  in  order  to  avoid  the  hear- 
 ing of  fuch  difcourfes.     Whereupun  fome  of  the  ferious  per- 
 
 3  E  2  funs 
 
404      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 fons  agreed  to  difperfe  themfelves  into  the  feveral  parts  of 
 the  Tettiement.  So  that  whcre-ever  the /Grangers  went,  thej 
 met  with  feme   inftru(fi:ive  difcourfe,  and  warm  addrefies  re- 
 
 fpe<fHng  their  foul's  concern. But  now  there  was  no  need 
 
 of  ufing  policy  in  order  to  get  an  opportunity  of  converfing 
 ■with  fome  of  them  about  their  fpiritual  concerns :  for  they 
 •were  fo  far  touched  with  a  fcnfe  of  their  perifhing  ftate,  as 
 made  them  tamely  yield  to  the  clofejl  addrefles  that  were  made 
 them,  refpecting  their  fin  and  railery,  their  need  of  an  ac- 
 quaintance with,  and  intereft  in  the  great  Redeemer. 
 
 March  24.  Numbered  the  Indians,  to  fee  how  many  fouls 
 God  had  gathered  together  here,  fince  my  coming  into  thcfe 
 parts ;  and  found  there  was  now  about  an  hundred  and  thirty 
 perfons  together,  old  and  young.  Sundry  of  rhofe  that  are 
 my  ftated  hearers,  perhaps  to  the  number  oi  fifteen  or  twenty^ 
 ■WM-e  abfent  at  this  feafon.  So  that  if  all  had  been  together, 
 the  number  would  now  have  been  very  confiderable  ;  efpecial- 
 ly  confidering  \\o-w  few  were  together  at  my  firft  coming  into 
 thefe  parts,  the  whole  number  not  amounting  to  ten  perfons 
 at  that  time. 
 
 My  people  going  out  this  day  upon  the  defign  of  clearing 
 fome  of  their  lands  above  fifteen  miles  diftant  from  this  fettlc- 
 ment,  in  order  to  their  fettling  there  in  a  compaft  form, 
 where  they  might  be  under  advantages  of  attending  the  pub- 
 lic worfhip  of  God,  of  having  their  children  fchooled,  and  at 
 the  fame  time  have  a  conveniency  for  planting,  6c. ;  their 
 land  in  the  place  of  our  prefent  refidence  being  of  little  or  no 
 value  for  that  purpofe.  And  the  defign  of  their  fettling  thus  in 
 a  body,  and  cultivating  their  larJs  (which  they  have  done  very 
 little  at  in  their  Pagan  ftate)  being  of  fuch  neceflity  and  im- 
 portance to  their  religious  intereft,  as  well  as  worldly  com- 
 fort, I  thought  it  proper  to  call  them  together,  and  ftiew  them 
 the  duty  of  labouring  with  faithfulnefs  and  induftry ;  and  that 
 they  muft  not  now  "  be  flothful  in  bufinefs,"  as  they  had 
 ever  been  in  their  Pagan  ftate.  And  endeavoured  to  prefs 
 the  importance  of  their  being  laborious,  diligent,  and  vigorous 
 in  the  profecurion  of  their  bufinefs,  efpecially  at  the  prefent 
 juncture,  (the  feafon  of  planting  being  now  near),  in  order 
 to  their  being  in  a  capacity  of  living  together,  and  enjoying 
 the  means  of  grace  and  inftru6lion.  And  having  given  them 
 dire<fi:ions  for  their  work,  (which  they  very  much  wanted,  as 
 M'ell  as  for  their  behaviour  in  divers  refpecls,  I  explained,  fang, 
 and  endeavoured  to  inculcate  upon  them  Pfal.  cxxvii.  common 
 metre,  Dr  Watts's  vcrfion.    And  having  recommended  them, 
 
 an4 
 
AMONG     THE    INDIANS.  405 
 
 «nd  the  defign  of  their  going  forth,  to  God,  by  prayer  with 
 them,  I  dilmifTed  them  toth^ir  bufincfs. 
 
 In  the  evening  read  and  expounded  to  my  people  (thofe  of 
 thera  who  were  yet  at  home,  and  the  grangers  newly  come) 
 the  fubftance  of  the  third  chapter  of  the  A£ls.  Numbers  feera- 
 cd  to  melt  under  the  word,  efpecially  while  I  was  diicourfmg 
 upon  verf.  19.     Sundry  of  the  ftrangtrs  alfo  were  afFefted. 
 
 When  1  afked  them  afterwards,  whether  they  did  not 
 
 now  feel  that  their  hearts  were  ivicked,  as  I  had  taught  them  ? 
 One  replied,  "  Yes,  fhe  felt  it  now."  Although  before  fhe 
 came  here,  (upon  hearing  that  I  taught  the  Indians  their 
 hearts  were  all  bad  by  nature,  and  needed  to  be  changed  and 
 made  good  by  the  power  of  God),  flie  had  faid,  "  her  heart 
 **  was  not  wicked,  and  fhe  never  had  done  any  thing  that 
 "  was  bad  in  her  life."  And  this  indeed  feems  to  be  the  cafe 
 with  them,  I  think,  univerfally  in  their  Pagan  ftate. 
 
 They  feem  to  have  no  confcioitfnefs  of  fin  and  guilt,  unlefs 
 they  can  charge  themfelves  with  fume  grofs  a^s  of  fin  con- 
 trary to  the  commands  of  the  fecond  table. 
 
 March  27.  Difcourfed  to  a  number  of  my  people  in  one  of 
 their  houfes  in  a  more  private  manner.  Enquired  particular- 
 ly into  their  fpiritual  flates,  in  order  to  fee  what  imprtffions 
 of  a  religions  nature  they  were  under.  Laid  before  then\ 
 the  marks  and  tokens  of  a  regenef'ate,  as  well  as  unreg  enerate 
 ftate :  and  endeavoured  to  fuit  and  direft  my  difcourle  to 
 them  fcverally  according  as  I  apprehended  their  ftates  to 
 be. 
 
 There  was  a  confiderable  number  gathered  together,  before 
 I  finilTied  my  difcourle;  and  divers  feemed  much  affedled, 
 ■while   I   was  urging  the  neceffity  and  infiaite  importance  of 
 
 getting  into  a  renewed  f>ate. 1  find  particular  and  clofe 
 
 dealing  v/ith  fouls  in  private,  is  often  very  fuccefsful. 
 
 March  29.  In  the  evening  catechifed  as  ufual  upon  Satur- 
 day.—  Treared  upon  the  "benefits  which  believers  receive  from 
 
 *'  Chrift  at  death." The   quefiions   were   anfwered  with 
 
 great  readinefs  and  propriety.  And  thofe  who,  J  have  rea- 
 fon  to  think,  are  the  dear  people  of  God,  were  fweetly  melt- 
 ed almoft  in  general.  There  appeared  fuch  a  livelinefs  and 
 vigour  in  their  attendance  upon  ihe  word  of  God,  and  fuch 
 eagernefs  to  be  made  partakers  of  the  benefits  then  mention- 
 ed, that  they  feemed  to  be  not  only  *'  looking  for,  but  ha- 
 **  fting  to  the  coming  of  the  day  of  God."  Divine  truths  feem- 
 ed to  diftil  upon  the  audience  with  a  gentle,  but  melting  ef 
 ficacy,  as  the  refrefliing  "  fliowers  upon  the  new  mown  grafs." 
 The  auembly  in  genera),  as  well  as  thofe  who  appear  truly 
 
 religiouf. 
 
4o6     DIVINE     GRACE    DISPLAYED 
 
 religious,  were  afFefted  with  fome  brief  account  of  the  blefT- 
 cdnefs  of  the  godly  at  death:  and  mofl:  then  difcovered  an  af- 
 fe(flionare  inclination  to  cry,  "  Let  me  die  the  death  of  the 
 "  righteous,"  6c.  Although  many  were  not  duly  engaged 
 to  obtain  the  change  of  heart  that  is  neceflary  in  order  to 
 that  bleflbd  end. 
 
 Lord's  day,  March  30.  Difcourfed  from  Matth.  xxv.  31. 
 to 40.  There  was  a  very  confiderable  moving  and  atfe6tionate 
 melting  in  the  afTembly.  I  hope  there  were  fome  real,  deep, 
 and  abiding  imprellions  of  divine  things  made  upon  the  minds 
 
 of  many. There  was  one  aged  man  newly  come  among 
 
 us,  who  appeared  to  be  confidcrably  awakened,  that  never 
 •was  touched  with  any  concern  for  his  foul  before. 
 
 In  the  evening  catechifed.  Thei  e  was  not  that  tendernefs 
 and  melting  engagrment  among  God's  people  that  appeared 
 the  evening  before,  and  at  many  other  times.  Although  they 
 anl'wered  the  (jueftlms  diftinftly  and  well,  and  v/erc  devout  and 
 attentive  in  divine  fcrvice. 
 
 March  31.  Called  my  people  together,  as  I  had  done  the 
 Monday  morning  before,  and  difcourfed  to  them  again  on  the 
 neceifity  and  importance  of  their  labouring  induftrioully,  int 
 order  ro  tlidV  living  together,  and  enjoying  the  means  of 
 grace,  '6c.  And  having  engaged  in  folemn  prayer  to  God  ap 
 mong  them.,  for  a  bieffing  upon  their  attempts,  I  difmiffed 
 ihcm  to  their  work. 
 
 Numbers  of  them  (both  men  and  women)  feemed  to  offer 
 thejnfelves  willingly  tu  this  fervice ;  and  fome  appeared  af- 
 fedionately  concerned  that  God  might  go  with  them,  and 
 begin  their  Little  toivn  for  them;  that  by  his  bieffing  it  might 
 be  a  place  comfortable  for  them  and  theirs,  in  regard  both  of 
 procuring  the  neceffaries  of  life,  and  of  attending  the  worfhip 
 of  God. 
 
 April  5.  1746.  Catechifed  towards  evening.  There  ap- 
 peared to  be  fome  afFeclion  and  fervent  engagement  in  di- 
 vine fervice  through  the  affembly  in  general  j  efpecially  to- 
 wards the  conclufion  of  my  difcourfe. 
 
 After  public  worfhip,  a  number  of  thofe  I  have  reafon  to 
 think  are  truly  religious,  came  to  my  houfe,  and  feemed 
 eager  of  fome  further  entertainment  upon  divine  things. 
 And  while  I  was  converfmg  with  them  about  their  fpiritual 
 cxcrcifes,  cbfcrving  to  them,  that  God's  work  in  the  hearts 
 of  ail  his  children,  was,  for  fubflance,  the  fam.e ;  and  that 
 their  trials  and  temptations  were  aifo  alike  ;  and  fhewing  the 
 obiigationsy?/cA  were  under  to  loz^e  one  another  in  a  peculiar 
 manner,  they   feemed  to  be  melted  into  tendernefs  and  af- 
 
 feftion 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  407 
 
 fcftion  toward  each  other:  and  I  thought  that  particular  token 
 of  their  being  the  difciples  of  Chrift,  viz.  of  their  "  having 
 "  love  one  toward  another,"  had  fcarce  ever  appeared  more 
 evident  than  at  this  time. 
 
 Lord's  day,  April  6.  Preached  from  Matth.  vii.   21. — 23. 
 
 There  were  confiderable  eifedts  of  the   word   vifiblc   m. 
 
 the  audience,  2LU<\fiich  as  were  very  defirable :  an  earncft  at- 
 tention, a  great  foiemnity,  many  tears  and  heavy  fighs,  which 
 were  modeTUy  fupprefled  in  a  confiderable  meafure,  and  ap- 
 peared unaffetSled,  and  without  any  indecent  commotion  of 
 the  palBons.  Divers  of  the  religious  people  were  put  upon 
 ferious  and  clofe  examination  of  their  fpiritual  ftates,  by 
 hearing  that  "  not  every  one  that  faith  to  Chrift,  Lord,  Lord, 
 **  /hall  enter  into  his  kingdom."  And  fome  of  them  expre fled 
 fears  leaft  they  had  deceived  themfelves,  and  taken  up  a  falfc 
 hope,  becaufe  they  found  they  had  done  fo  little  of  the  "  will 
 "  of  his  Father  who  is  in  heaven." 
 
 There  was  alfo  one  man  brought  under  very  great  and 
 preffing  concern  for  his  foul;  which  appeared  more  efpecially 
 after  hi«  retirement  from  public  worfhip.  And  that  which, 
 he  fays,  gave  him  his  great  uneafmefs,  was,  not  fo  much  any 
 particular  fin,  as  that  he  had  never  done  the  will  of  God  at 
 all,  but  had  finned  continually,  and  fo  had  no  claim  to  the 
 kingdom  of  heaven. 
 
 Li  the  afternoon  I  opened  to  them  the  difcipUnc  of  Chrift 
 in  his  church,  and  the  method  in  which  offenders  arc  to  be 
 dealt  ^ith.  At  which  time  the  rtligious  people  were  much 
 afFv-dited,  efpecially  when  they  heard,  that  the  offender  con- 
 tinuing obftinate,  muft  finally  be  efteemed  and  treated  "  as 
 "  an  Heathen  man,"  as  a  Pagan,  that  has  no  part  nor  lot  a- 
 mong  God's  vifible  people.  This  they  feemed  to  have  the 
 moft  awful  apprehenfions  of;  a  ftate  of  Heathenifm,  out  of 
 which  they  were  fo  lately  brought,  appearing  very  dreadful  to 
 them. 
 
 After  public  worfhip  I  vifited  fundry  houfes  to  fee  how 
 they  fpent  the  remainder  of  the  Sabbath,  and  to  treat  with 
 them  folemnly  on  the  great  concerns  of  their  fouls:  and 
 the  Lord  feemed  to  fmile  upon  my  private  endeavours,  and  to 
 make  the fe  particular  and  pej-Jonal  Addrciks  more  ellcftual  upon 
 fome,  than  my  public  difcourl'es. 
 
 April  7.  Difcourfed  to  my  people  at  evening  from  i  Cor. 
 xi.  23.  26.  And  endeavoured  to  open  to  them  the  inftitution, 
 nature,  and  ends  of  the  Lord's  fupper,  as  well  as  the  qualifi' 
 cations  and  preparations   neceffary   to  the  right  participation 
 
 of  that  ordinance. Sundry  perfons  appeared  much  affeft- 
 
 ed 
 
4©8      DIVINE     GRACEDISPLAYED 
 
 ed  with  the  love  of  Chrift  manifefted  in  his  making  this  prd« 
 vifi)n  for  the  comfort  of  his  people,  at  a  feafon  when  him- 
 feif  was  juit  entering  upon  his  fharpeft  fuffeiings. 
 
 Lord's  day,  April  ao.  Difcourfed  both  forenoon  and  after- 
 noon from  Luke  xxiv.  explaining  moft  of  the  chapter,  and 
 making  remarks  upon  it.  There  was  a  defirable  attention 
 in  the  audience,  though  there  was  not  fo  much  appearance  of 
 affcftion  and  tendernefs  among  them  as  has  been  ufual. — Our 
 meeting  was  very  full,  there  being  [undry /l)  angers  prefent, 
 ■who  had  never  been  with  us  before. 
 
 In  the  evening  catechifed.  My  people  anfwered  the  que- 
 ftions  propofed  to  them,  readily  and  diftindtly ;  and  1  could 
 perceive  they  advanced  in  their  knowledge  of  the  principles  of 
 Chriftianity. 
 
 There  appeared  an  afFc£lionate  melting  in  the  afTcmbly  at 
 this  time.  Sundry  who,  I  truft^  are  truly  religious,  were 
 refrefhed  and  quickened,  and  feemed,  by  their  difcourfe  and 
 behaviour,  after  public  worfhip,  to  have   their    "  hearts  knit 
 
 "  together  in  love." This  was  a  fweet  and  blefled  feafon, 
 
 like  many  others,  that  my  poor  people  have  been  favoured 
 with  in  months  pafl.  God  has  caufed  this  little  fleece  to  be 
 repeatedly  wet  with  the  bleffed  dews  of  his  divine  grace, 
 while  all  the  earth  around  has  been  comparatively  dry. 
 
 April  25.  Having  of  late  apprehended  that  a  number  of 
 perfons  in  my  congregation,  were  proper  fubjefts  of  the  or- 
 dinance of  the  Lord's  Juppe?;  and  that  it  might  ht  feafonable 
 ipcedily  to  adminifter  it  to  them:  and  having  taken  advice  of 
 fome  of  the  reverend   correfpondents  in   this  folemn  affair; 
 and  accordingly   having  propofed  and    appointed  the  next 
 Lord's  day  (with  leave  of  divine  providence)  for  the  admini- 
 ftration  of  this  ordinance,   this  day,  as  preparatory  thereto 
 was  (et  apart  for  folemn  fa/ling  and  prayer,  to  implore  the 
 bleffing  of  God  upon  our  defign  of  renewing  covenant  with 
 him,  and  with  one  another,  to  walk  together  in  the  fear  of 
 God,  in  love  and   Chriftian   fellowlliip ;  and  to  intreat  that 
 his  divine  prefence  might  be  with  us  in  our  defigned  approach 
 to  his  table ;  as  well  as  to  humble  ourfelves  before  God  on  ac- 
 count of  the  apparent  withdrawment  (at  leaft  in  a  meafure) 
 of  that  bleffed  influence  that  has  been  fo  prevalent  upon  per- 
 fons of  all   ages   among  us;  as  alfo  on   account  of  the  rifmg 
 appearance  of  carelcfliiefs,    vanity,    and  vice  among  fome, 
 who,  fome  time  fmce,  appeared  to  be  touched  and  affefted 
 with  divine   truths,  and   brought  to   fome  fenfibility  of  their 
 miferable  andpcrilliing   ftate  by  nature.     And  that  we  might 
 alfo  importunately  pray  for  the  peaceable y^'^t/owcKf  of  the  In. 
 
 dians 
 
AMONGTHE     INDIANS. 
 
 sJians  together  in  a  body,  that  they  might  be  a  commodious 
 congregation  for  the  W-orihip  of  God ;  and  that  God  would 
 blafi  and  defeat  all  the  attempts  that  were  or  might  be  made 
 againft  that  pious  defign  *. 
 
 The  folcmnity  was  obferved  and  ferioufly  attended,  not 
 only  by  thofe  who  propofed  to  communicate  at  the  Lord's 
 table,  but  by  the  whole  congregation  univerfally. — In  the  for- 
 mer part  of  the  day,  I  endeavoured  to  open  to  my  people  the 
 nature  and  defign  of  a /<?/?,  as  I  had  attempted  more  briefly 
 to  do  before,  and  to  inftru^l  them  in  the  duties  of  fuch  a  fo- 
 
 lemnity. In  the  afternoon,  I  infifted  upon  the  fpecial  rea- 
 
 fons  there  were  for  our  engaging  in  thefe  folernn  exercifes  at 
 this  time;  both  in  regard  of  the  need  we  ftood  in  of  divine 
 alfiftance,  in  order  to  a  due  preparation  for  that  facred  ordi- 
 nance we  were  fome  of  us  propofmg  (with  leave  of  divine 
 providence)  fpeedily  to  attend  upon;  and  alfo  in  refpefl  of 
 the  manifeft  decline  of  God's  work  here,  as  to  the  effeftual 
 conviflion  and  converfion  of  finners,  there  having  been  few 
 of  late  deeply  awakened  out  of  a  ftate  of  fecurlty. 
 
 The  worlhip  of  God  was  attended  with  great  folcmhity 
 and  reverence,  with  much  tendernefs  and  many  tears,  by 
 thofe  who  appear  to  be  truly  religious :  and  there  was  fome 
 appearance  of  divine  power  upon  thofe  who  had  been  awaken- 
 ed fome  time  before,  and  who  were  dill  under  concern. 
 
 After  repeated  prayer  and  attendance  upon  the  word  of 
 God,  I  propofed  to  the  religious  people  with  as  much  brevity 
 and  plainnefs  as  I  could,  the  fubftance  of  the  do^rlne  of  the 
 Chrijlian  faith,  as   I   had  formerly  done,  previous  to  their 
 
 baptifm,  and  had  their  renewed  cheerful  aiTent  to  it. 1 
 
 then  led  them  to  a  folemn  renewal  of  their  bapt/fmal  cove- 
 nant, wherein  they  had  explicitly  and  publicly  given  up  them- 
 felves  to  God,  the  Father,  Son,  and  Holy  Ghofl,  avouching 
 him  to  be  their  God;  and  at  the  fame  time  renouncing  their 
 Heathenifh  vanities,  their  idolatrous  and  fupeifiltious  prac- 
 tices, and  folemnly  engaging  to  take  the  word  of  God,  fo 
 far  as  it  was,   or  might  be  made  known  to  them,  for  the  rule 
 
 *  There  being  at  this  time  a  terrible  clamour  raifed  againft  the 
 Indians  in  various  places  in  the  country,  and  infinuations  as  though 
 I  was  training  them  up  to  cut  people's  throats.  Numbers  wilhing 
 to  have  them  banifhcd  out  of  thefe  parts,  and  fome  giving  out  great 
 words,  in  order  to  fright  and  deter  them  from  fettling  upon  the  beft 
 and  moft  convenient  track  of  their  own  lands,  threatening  to  mo- 
 left  and  trouble  them  in  the  law,  pretending  a  claim  to  thefe  lands 
 themfclves,  although  never  purcliafed  of  the  Indians. 
 
 3  t"  •/ 
 
410      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 of  their  lives,  promifing  to  walk  together  in  love,  to  watch 
 over  themfelves,  and  one  another;  to  lead  lives  of  ferioufnefs 
 and  devotion,  and  to  difcharge  the  relative  duties  incumbent 
 upon  them  rerpe<ftively,  6c. 
 
 This  folemn  tranfaclion  was  attended  with  much  gravity 
 and  ferioufnefs;  and  at  the  fame  ti-ne  with  utmoft  readinefs, 
 freedom,  and  cheerfulnefs;  and  a  religious  union  and  har- 
 mony of  foul,  feemed  to  crown  the  whole  folemnity.  I 
 could  not  but  think  in  the  evening,  that  th^^re  had  been  mani- 
 feft  tokens  of  the  divine  prefcnce  with  us  in  all  the  feveral  fer- 
 vices  of  the  day;  though  it  was  alfo  manifeft  there  was  not 
 that  concern  among  Chriftlefs  fouls  that  has  often  appeared 
 here. 
 
 April  26.  Toward  noon  prayed  with  a  dying  chilH,  and 
 gave  a  word  of  exhortation  to  the  by-flanders  to  prepare  for 
 death,  which  feemed  to  take  effeft  upon  fome. 
 
 In  the  afternoon  difcourfed  to  my  people  from  Matth. 
 xxvi.  26. — 30.  of  the  author,  the  nature  and  defign  of  the 
 Lord's  fupper ;  and  endeavoured  to  point  out  the  ivorthy  re- 
 ceivers of  that  ordinance. 
 
 The  religious  people  were  affedled,  and  even  melted  with 
 divine  truths, — with  a  view  of  the  dying  love  of  Chrift. 
 Simdry  others  who  had  been  for  fome  months  under  convic- 
 tions of  their  perifhing  (late,  appeared  now  to  be  much  mo- 
 ved with  concern,  and  afrefh  engaged  in  feeking  after  an  in- 
 tereft  in  Chrift;  although  I  cannot  fay,  "the  word  of  God" 
 appeared  "fo  quick  and  powerful,"  fo  (harp  and  piercing  to 
 the   afTembly,  as  it  had  fometimes  formerly  done. 
 
 Baptized  t^vo  adult  perfons,  both  ferious  and  exemplary  m 
 their  lives,  and,  I  hope,  truly  religious.  One  of  them  was  the 
 man  particularly  mentioned  in  my  Journal  of  the  6th  inftant; 
 who  although  he  wais  then  greatly  diflreffed,  becaufe  "he  had 
 "  never  done  the  will  of  God,"  has  fince  (it  is  hopeful)  obtain- 
 ed fpiritual  comfort  upon  good  grounds. 
 
 In  the  evening  I  catechifed  thofe  that  w^ere  dcfigned  to  par- 
 take of  the  Lord's  fupper  the  next  day,  upon  the  inAitution, 
 nature,  and  end  of  that  ordinance ;  and  had  abundant  fatif- 
 fadlion  refpefling  their  doctrinal  knowledge  and  fitnefs  in 
 that  refpefl  for  an  attendance  upon  it.  They  likewife  ap- 
 peared, in  general,  to  have  an  afFefting  fenfe  of  the  folemnity 
 of  this  facred  ordinance,  and  to  be  humbled  under  a  fcnfe  of 
 their  own  unworthinefs  to  approach  to  God  in  it;  and  to  be 
 earneftly  concerned  that  they  might  be  duly  prepared  for  an 
 attendance  upon  it.  Their  hearts  were  full  of  love  one  to- 
 ward another,  and  that  was  the  frame  of  mind  they  feemed 
 
 mush 
 
AMONG    THE    INDIANS.  ^u 
 
 much  concerned  to  maintain,  and  bring  to  the  Lord's  table 
 with  them. 
 
 In  finging  and  prayer,  after  catechifing,  there  appeared  an 
 agreeable  tendcrnefs  and  melting  among  them,  ,  and  fuch 
 tokens  of  brotherly  love  and  affection,  that  would  even  con- 
 ftrain  one  to  fay,  "  Lord,  it  is  good  to  be  here  ;"  it  is  good 
 to  dwell  where  fuch  an  heavenly  influence  diftills. 
 
 Lord's  day,  April  27.  Preached  from  Tit.   ii.  14.  "Who 
 
 "  gave  himfelf  for  us/'   drc. The  word  of  God  at  this 
 
 time  was  attended  with  fome  appearance  of  divine  power  up- 
 pn  the  afleinbly ;  fo  that  the  attention  and  gravity  of  the  au- 
 dience was  remarkable;  and  efpecially  towards  the  conclufton 
 of  the  exercife  divers  perfons  were  much  affefted. 
 
 Aii-ninillered  the  facra?nent  of  the  Lord's  fupper  to  tivoity- 
 three  perfons  of  the  Indians,  (the  number  of  7nen  and  women 
 being  near  equal),  divers  others,  to  the  number  of  five  or  fix , 
 being  now  abfent  at  the  Forks  of  Delaware,  who  would  other- 
 wife  have  communicated  with  us. 
 
 The  ordinance  was  attended  with  great  folcmnity,  and 
 with  a  mofl  defirable  tendernefs  and  aifcdtion.  And  it  w^s 
 remarkable,  that  in  the  feafonof  the  performance  of  they^c;vj- 
 7nental  actions,  efpecially  in  the  diflribution  of  the  breads 
 they  feemed  to  be  affefted  in  a  moft  lively  manner,  as  if 
 *^  Chrifthad  been"  really  "  crucified  before  them."  And  the 
 words  of  the  inftitution,  when  repeated  and  enlarged  upon 
 in  the  feafon  of  the  adminiftration,  feemed  to  meet  with  the 
 fame  reception,  to  be  entertained  with  the  fame  full  ztid  firm 
 belief  and  affe6lionate  engagement  of  foul,  as  if  the  Lord 
 Jefus  Chrift  himfelf  had  been  prefent,  and  hzA  perfonally  fpo- 
 ken  to  them. 
 
 The  aftt.ftions  of  the  communicants,  although  confiderably 
 raifed,  were  notwithftanding  agreeably  regulated,  and  kept 
 within  pioper  bounds.  So  that  there  was  a  fweet,  gentle, 
 and  affe£lionate  melting,  without  any  indecent  or  boiilerovis 
 commotion  of  the  palTions. 
 
 Having  refted  fome  time  after  the  adminiftration  of  the 
 facrament,  (being  extremely  tired  v.'ith  theneceffary  prolixity 
 of  the  work),  I  walked  from  houfe  to  houfe,  and  converfed 
 particularly  with  mofl:  of  the  communicants,  and  found  they 
 had  been  almoft  univerfally  refreflied  at  the  Lord's  tabic  "as 
 *'  with  new  wine."  And  never  did  I  fee  fuch  an  appearance 
 of  Chriflian  love  among  any  people  in  all  my  life.  It  was  fo 
 remarkable,  that  one  might  well  have  cried  with  an  agreeable 
 furprife,  "Behold  how  they  love  one  an  )ther !"  I  think  there 
 could  be  no  greater   tokens  of  mutual  affedtion  among  the 
 
 3  F  2  people 
 
412      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 people  of  God  in  the  early  days  of  Chriftianity,  than  what 
 now  appeared  here.  The  fight  was  fo  defirable,  and  fo 
 well  becormng  the  gofpel,  that  nothing  lefs  could  be  laid  of  it, 
 than  that  it  was  **the  doing  of  the  Lord,"  the  genuine  ope- 
 rations of  Iiim  "who  is  love!" 
 
 Toward  night  dxfcourfed  again  on  the  forementioned 
 Tit.  ii.  14.  and  infifted  on  the  immediate  end  and  delign  of 
 Chrift's  death,  viz^  "  That  he  might  redeem  his  people  from 
 ^'  all  iniquity,"  6c. 
 
 This  appeared  to  be  a  feafon  of  divine  power  among  us. 
 The  religious  people  were  much  refrefhed,  andifeemed  re- 
 markably tender  and  affeftionate,  full  of  love,  joy,  peace, 
 and  defires  of  being  completely  "  redeemed  from  ail  iniquity  ;" 
 io  that  fome  of  them  afterwards  told  me,  "  they  had  never 
 **  felt  the  like  before." — Convi<fHons  alfo  appeared  to  be  re- 
 vived in  many  inflances ;  and  divers  perfons  were  awakened 
 whom  I  had  never  obferved  under  any  religious  Imprcilions 
 before. 
 
 Such  was  the  influence  that  attended  our  afl^embly,  and  (o 
 unfpeakably  defirable  the  frame  of  mind  that  many  enjoyed 
 in  the  divine  fervice,  that  it  feemed  almofl  grievous  to  con- 
 clude the  public  worfliip.  And  the  congregation  when  dif- 
 mifled,  although  it  was  then  almofl  dark,  appeared  loth  to 
 leave  the  place  and  employmerts  that  had  been  rendered  ft 
 dear  to  them  by  the  benefits  enjoyed,  while  a  blefTed  quicken- 
 ing influence  diftilled  upon  them. 
 
 And  upon  the  whole,  I  mufl  fay,  I  had  great  fatisfaOiott 
 with  relation  to  the  admlniftration  of  this  ordinance  in  divers 
 refpecls.  I  have  abundant  reafon  to  think,  that  thofe  who 
 came  to  the  Lord's  table,  had  a  good  degree  of  dc^inal  know- 
 ledge of  the  nature  and  defign  of  the  ordinance  :  and  that  they 
 acted  under/} andingly  in  what  they  did. 
 
 In  the  preparatory  fervices  I  found  (I  may  jufl:ly  fay)  un- 
 common freedom  in  opening  to  their  underftandings  and  ca- 
 pacities, the  covenant  cf  grace,  and  in  fbewingthem  the  nature 
 of  this  ordinance  as  zfeal  of  that  covenant.  Although  many 
 of  tht-m  knew  of  no  fuch  thing  as  a  feal  before  my  coming 
 among  them,  or  at  leafl:  of  the  ufe  and  dcfgn  of  it  in  the  com.- 
 
 mon  affairs  of  life. They  were   likewife  thoroughly   fen- 
 
 fible  that  it  was  no  more  than  zfeal  ox  fgn,  and  not  the  real 
 body  and  blood  of  Chrifl. — That  it  was  def;gned  for  the  re- 
 frefliment  and  edificaticn  of  rhejoul,  and  not  for  the  fecfing 
 
 i'f  the  body. 1  hey  were  alfo  acquainted  with  the   end   of 
 
 the  ordinance,  that  they  were  therein  called  to  ccnnrtenjcratc 
 the  dying  love  of  Chrifl.  ic. 
 
 Ana 
 
AMONG     THE    INDIANS.  413 
 
 And  this  competency  of  doftrinal  knowledge,  together 
 ■^ith  their  grave  and  decent  attendance  upon  the  ordinance  ; 
 their  affed^ionate  melting  under  it ;  and  the  fweet  and  Chri- 
 llian  frame  of  mind  they  difcovered  confequent  upon  it,  gave 
 ine  great  faiisfadion  refpcfting  my  adminiftration  of  it  to 
 them. 
 
 And  O  what  a  fweet  and  blefled  feafon  was  this!  God  him- 
 felf,  I  am  perfuaded,  was  in  the  midft  of  his  people,  attend- 
 ing his  own  ordinances.  And  I  doubt  not  but  many  in  the 
 conclulion  of  the  day,  could  fay,  with  their  whole  hearts, 
 "  Verily,  a  day  thus  fpent  in  God's  houfe,  is  better  than  a 
 "  thoufand  elfewhere."  There  feemed  to  be  but  one  heart 
 am.)ng  the  pious  people.  The  fweet  union,  harmony,  and 
 cndeanng  love  and  tendernefs  fubfifting  among  them,  was  (I 
 thought)  the  mofl:  lively  emblem  of  the  heavenly  world  1  had 
 ever  1;  en. 
 
 April  iS.  Concluded  the  facramental  folemnity  with  a  dif^ 
 courfe  upon  John  xiv.  15.  "If  ye  love  me,  keep  my  com- 
 **  rnandments.''  At  which  time  there  appeared  a  very  agree- 
 able tendernefs  in  the  audience  in  general,  but  efpecially  in 
 the  communicants. O  how  free,  how  engaged  and  affec- 
 tionate did  thefe  appear  in  the  fervice  of  God !  they  feemed 
 willing  to  have  their  "  ears  bored  to  the  door-pofts  of  God's 
 **  houfe,"  and  to  be  his  fervants  for  ever. 
 
 Obferving  numbers  in  this  excellent  frame,  and  the  aflem- 
 bly  in  general  afFefted,  and  that  by  a  divine  influence,  I  thought 
 it  proper  to  improve  this  advantageous  feafon,  as  Hezekiah 
 did  the  defirable  feafon  of  his  great  pa ffover,  (2  Chron.  xxxi.) 
 in  order  to  promote  the  blelfed  reformation  begun  among 
 them ;  and  to  engage  thofe  that  appear  fcrious  and  religious, 
 to  perfevere  therein  ;  and  accordingly  propofed  to  them,  that 
 they  fhould  renewedly  enter  into  covenant  before  God,  that 
 they  would  watch  over  themfelves  and  one  another,  left  they 
 ihould  diflionour  the  name  of  Chrift  by  falling  into  finful  and 
 unbecoming  praftices.  And  efpecially  that  they  would  watch 
 againft  the  fin  of  drunkennefs,  (the  fin  that  eafily  befets 
 them),   and    the    temptations    leading    thereto ;  as    well    as 
 
 "  the  appearance  of  evil"  in  that  refpedl. They  cheerfully 
 
 complied  with  the /ro/jc/}//,  and  explicitly  joined  in  that  co- 
 x'enant;  whereupon  I  proceeded  in  the  moft  folemn  manner  I 
 was  capable  of,  to  call  God  to  ivitjufs  refpefling  their  facred 
 engagement;  and  minded  them  of  the  greatnefs  of  the  guilt 
 they  would  contraft  to  themfelves  in  the  violation  of  it ;  as 
 well  as  obferved  to  them,  that  God  would  be  a  terrible  ivit- 
 
 ncfs 
 
414      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 ncfs  againft  thofe  who  fhould  prefume  to  do  fo,  in  the  "  great 
 *'  and  notable  day  oi  the  Lord." 
 
 It  was  a  fcafon  of  amazing  folcmnity !  and  a  divine  awf 
 appeared  up  n  the  face  ot  the  whole  aflembly  in  this  tranf- 
 adion!  Aiicdionate  lobs,  lighs,  and  tears,  were  now  frequent 
 in  the  audience :  and  1  doubt  not  but  tnat  many  filent  cries 
 were  then  (ient  up  to  the  fountain  of  grace,  for  fupplies  of 
 grace  fufficicnt  for  the  fulfilment  of  thefe  folemn  engage- 
 ments. 
 
 Baptized  fix  children  this  day. 
 
 Lord's  day,  May  4.  My  people  being  now  removed  to 
 their  lands,  mentioned  in  my  Journal  of  IViarch  24.  where 
 they  were  then,  and  have  fince  been  making  provifion  for  a 
 compa^fettlenient,  in  order  to  their  more  convenient  enjoy- 
 anent  of  the  gofpel,  and  other  means  of  initruftion,  as  well 
 as  the  comforts  of  life ;  I  this  day  vifited  them,  (being  now 
 obliged  to  board  with  an  Englifh  family  at  fome  dilhnce  from 
 ihem),  and  preached  to  them  in  the  foienoon  from  Mark  iv.  j. 
 Endeavoured  to  fliew  them  the  reafon  there  was  to  fear  left 
 many  promlfing  appearances  and  hopeful  beginnings  in  reli- 
 gion, might  prove  abortive,  like  the  "  feed  dropped  upon 
 "  ftony  places." 
 
 In  the  afternoon  difcourfed  upon  Rom.  viii.  9.  "  Now  if 
 "  any  man   have  not  the  Spirit  of  Chrift,  he  is  none  of  his." 
 
 — 1  have  reafon  to  think  this  difcourfe  was  peculiarly  lea- 
 
 fonable,  and  that  it  had  a  good  efFed  upon  fome  of  the  hear- 
 ers. 
 
 Spent  fome  hours  afterwards  in  private  conferences  with 
 my  people,  and  laboured  to  regulate  lome  things  I  apprehend- 
 ed amifs  among  fome  of  them. 
 
 May  5.  Vifited  my  people  again,  and  took  care  of  their 
 ^worldly  concerns,  giving  them  diredions  relating  to  their 
 bufineis. 
 
 I  dally  difcover  more  and  more  of  what  importance  it  is 
 like  to  be  to  tht'w religious  intercfts,  that  they  become  laborious 
 and  induHrious,  acquainted  with  the  affairs  of  hifandryy 
 and  able,  in  a  good  meafure,  to  raife  the  neceflaries  and  com- 
 forts of  life  rolthln  thevifelves;  for  their  prefent  method 
 of  living  greatly  expofes  them  to  temptations  of  various 
 kinds. 
 
 May  9.  Preached  from  John  v.  40.  in  the  open  wilder- 
 ncfs ;  the  Indians  having  as  yet  no  houfe  for  public  worfhip 
 in  this  place,  nor  fcarce  any  /belters  for  themfelves.' Di- 
 vine truths  made  confiderable  impreiTions  upon  the  audience, 
 
 ■and 
 
AMONG     THE    INDIANS.  415 
 
 and  it  was  a  feafon  of  folemnity,    tenderncfs,   and  afFec- 
 
 tion.  , 
 
 Baptized  one  man  this  day,  (the  conjurer,  murderer,  <bc, 
 mentioned  in  my  Journal  of  Auguft  8.  1/45.  and  Feburary  i. 
 1745-6.),  who  appears  to  be  fuch  a  remarkable  inftance  of  di- 
 vine grace,  that  i  cannot   omit   fome   brief  account  of  him 
 
 here. 
 
 He  lived  near,  and  fomctimes  attended  my  meeting  in  the 
 Forks  of  Delaware  for  more  than  a  year  together;  biit  was 
 (like  many  others  of  them)  extremely  attached  to  flrong 
 drink,  and  feemed  to  be  no  ways  reformed  by  the  means  I 
 ufed  with  them  for  their  inftruclion  and  converfion.  In  this 
 time  he  likewife  murdered  2i  likely  young  Indian,  which  threw 
 him  into  fome  kind  of  horror  and  defperation,  fo  that  he  kept 
 at  a  diftahcc  from  me,  and  refufed  to  hear  me  preach  for  fe- 
 veral  months  together,  (as  I  noted  in  a  formal  Journal  of 
 March  4.  1744-5),  ^^^^  ^  ^^^  ^"  opportunity  of  converfing 
 freely  with  him,  and  giving  him  encouragement,  that  his  fin 
 might  be  forgiven  for  Ch rift's  fake.  After  which  he  again 
 attended  my  meeting  at  fome  times. 
 
 But  that  which  was  the  worft  of  all  his  condu*^:,  was  his 
 conjuration.  He  was  one  of  them  who  are  fometimes  called 
 poivaioios  among  the  Indians :  and  notwithftanding  his  fre- 
 quent attendance  upon  my  preaching,  he  ftill  followed  his  old 
 charms  and  juggling  tricks,  "  giving  out  that  himfelf  was 
 *'  fome  great  one,  and  to  him  they  gave  heed,"  fuppofing 
 him  to  be  pofTefTed  of  a  great  power.  So  that  when  I  have 
 inftrufled  them  relpe6:ing  the  miracles  wrought  by  Chrift  ir» 
 healing  the  fick,  6r.  and  mentioned  them  as  evidences  of 
 his  divine  million,  and  the  truth  of  his  dofl^rines,  they  have 
 quickly  obferved  the  wonders  of  that  kind  which  this  man  had 
 performed  by  his  magic  charms:  whence  they  had  a  high  o- 
 pinion  of  him,  and  his  fuperftitious  notions,  which  feemed 
 to  be  a  fatal  obftruftion  to  fome  of  them  in  regard  of  their  re- 
 ceiving the  gofpcl.  And  I  have  often  thought,  it  would  be 
 a  great  favour  to  the  defiga  of  pofpellizing  the  Indians,  if 
 God  would  take  that  wretch  out  of  the  world  ;  for  I  had  fcarce 
 any  hope  of  his  ever  coming  to  good:  but  God,  '^  whofe 
 **  thoughts  are  not  as  man's  thoughts,"  has  been  pleafed  to 
 take  a  much  more  defirable  method  with  him;  a  method  a- 
 greeable  to  his  own  merciful  nature,  and,  I  truft,  advanta- 
 geous to  his  own  intereft  among  the  Indians,  as  well  as  effec- 
 tual to  the  falvation  of  the  poor  foul  himfelf-  *'  And  to  him 
 "  be  the  glory  of  it." 
 
 The  firfl  genuine  concern  for  his  foul  that  ever  appeared 
 
 ia 
 
4i6      DIVINE     GRACE     t)  I  S  P  L  A  Y  E  D 
 
 in  him,  was  excited  by  feeing  my  interpreter  and  his  wife  bap- 
 tized at  the  Forks  of  Delaware,  July  21.  1745.  Which  fo 
 prevailed  upon  him,  that,  with  the  invitation  of  an  Indian, 
 who  was  a  friend  to  Chriftianity,  he  followed  me  down  to 
 Crofweekfung  in  the  beginning  of  Auguft  following,  in  order 
 to  hear  me  preach,  and  there  continued  for  feveral  weeks,  in 
 the  feafon  of  the  mofl:  remarkable  and  powerful  awakening 
 among  the  Indians;  at  which  time  he  was  more  effeftually  a- 
 wakened,  and  brought  under  great  concern  for  his  foul  :  and 
 then,  he  fays,  upon  his  "  feeling  the  word  of  God  in  his 
 "  heart,"  (as  he  exprefles  it),  his  fpirit  of  conjuration  left 
 him  entirely  ;  that  he  has  had  no  more  power  of  that  nature 
 fince,  than  any  other  man  living.  And  declares  that  he  does 
 not  now  fo  much  as  know  how  he  ufed  to  charm  and  con- 
 jure ;  and  that  he  could  not  do  any  thing  of  that  nature  if  he 
 was  never  fo  deflrous  of  it. 
 
 He  continued  under  conviftions  of  his  finful  and  peri/hing 
 ftate,  and  a  conllderable  degree  of  concern  for  his  foul,  all 
 the  fall  and  former  part  of  the  winter  part,  but  was  not  fo 
 deeply  exercifed  till  fometime  in  January  ;  and  then  the  word 
 of  God  took  fuch  hold  upon  him,  that  he  was  brought  into 
 great  diftrefs,  and  knew  not  what  to  do,  nor  where  to  turn 
 
 himfelf. He  then  told  me,  that  when  he  ufed  to  hear  mc 
 
 yreach  from  time  to  time  in  the  fall  of  the  year,  my  preach- 
 ing pricked  his  he^rt  and  made  him  very  iineafy,  but  did  not 
 bring  him  to  ^o  great  diftrefs,  becaufe  he  ftill  hoped  he  could 
 dofofnething  for  his  own  relief:  but  now,  he  faid,  I  drave 
 him  up  into  "  fuch  a  (harp  corner,"  that  he  had  no  way  to 
 turn,  and  could  not  avoid  being  in  diftrefs. 
 
 He  continued  conftantly  under  the  heavy  burden  and  pref^ 
 fure  of  a  ivcimded fpirit,  till  at  length  he  was  brought  into  the 
 acute  anguifti  and  utraoft  agony  cf  foul,  mentioned  in  my 
 Journal  of  February  i.  which  continued  that  night,  and  part 
 tjf  the  next  day. 
 
 After  this,  he  was  brought  to  the  utmoft  calmnefs  and 
 compofure  of  mind,  his  trembling  and  heavy  burden  were  re- 
 moved, and  he  appeared  perfectly  fedate ;  although  he  had, 
 to  his  apprehenfions,  fcarce  any  hope  of  falvation. 
 
 I  obferved  him  to  appear  remarkably  compofed,  and  there- 
 upon alked  him  how  he  did?  He  replied,  "  It  is  done,  it  is 
 **  done,  it  is  all  done  now."  I  aflicd  him  what  he  meant? 
 He  anfwered,  "  I  can  never  do  any  more  to  fave  myfelf ;  it 
 **  is  all  done  for  ever,  I  can  do  no  more."  I  queried  with  him, 
 whether  he  could  not  do  a  little  more  rather  than  to  go  to 
 -hell.     He  replied,  "  My  heart  is  dead,  I  can  never  help  my- 
 
 «  felf." 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  417 
 
 "  felf."  I  afked  him,  what  he  thought  would  become  of  him 
 then?  He  anfwered,  "  I  muft  go  to  hell."  I  aiked  him,  if 
 he  thought  it  was  right  that  God  fhould  fend  him  to  hell? 
 He  replied,  "  O  it  is  right.  The  devil  has  been  in  me  ever 
 "  lince  I  was  born."  I  afked  him,  if  he  felt  this  when  he 
 was  in  fuch  great  diftrefs  the  evening  before?  He  anfwered, 
 "  No,  I  did  not  then  think  it  was  right.  I  thought  God 
 "  would  lend  me  to  hell,  and  that  I  was  then  dropping  into  it ; 
 "  but  my  heart  quarrelled  with  God,  and  would  not  fay  it  was 
 ''  right  he  fhould  fend  me  there.  But  now  1  know  it  is  right, 
 "  for  1  have  always  ferved  the  devil,  and  my  heart  has  no 
 
 "  goodnefs  in  it  now,  but  is  as  bad  as  ever  it  was,"  6c. '• 
 
 I  thought  I  had  fcarce  ever  feen  any  perfon  more  eHeftually 
 brought  off  from  a  dependence  upon  his  own  contrivances 
 and  endeavours  for  falvation,  or  more  apparently  to  lie  at  the 
 foot  of  fovereign  mercy,  than  this  man  nov/  did  under  thefc 
 views  of  things. 
 
 In  this  frame  of  mind  he  continued  for  feveral  days,  pafT 
 ing  fentencc  of  condemnation  upon  himfcif,  and  conllantly 
 owning,  that  it  would  be  right  he  fliould  be  damned,  and  that 
 he  expetfted  this  would  be  his  portion  for  the  greatnefs  of  his 
 fins.  And  yet  it  was  plain  he  had  a  fecret  hope  of  mercy, 
 though  imperceptible  to  himfelf,  which  kept  him  not  only  from 
 defpair,  but  from  any  preiling  diftrefs  :  lb  that  inflead  uf  be- 
 ing lad  and  dejecSled,  his  very  countenance  appeared  pleafant 
 and  agreeable. 
 
 While  he  was  in  this  frame,  he  fundry  times  allced  me, 
 *'  When  I  would  preach  again?"  and  feemed  defnous  to  hear 
 the  word  of  God  every  day.  I  afkcd  him  why  he  wanted  to 
 hear  me  preach,  feeing  "his  heart  was  dead,  and  all  was  done?*' 
 That  "  he  could  never  help  himfelf,  and  expected  that  he  muft 
 ''  go  to  hell?"  He  replied,  "  I  love  to  hear  you  fpeak  about 
 *'  Chrift  for  all."  T.  added.  But  what  good  will  that  do  you, 
 if  you  muft  go  to  hell  at  laft?  (ufmg  now  his  own  language 
 with  him ;  having  before,  from  time  to  time,  laboured  in  the 
 beft  manner  I  could,  to  reprefent  to  him  the  excellency  of 
 Chrift.  his  all-fufficiency  and  willingnci's  to  fave  loft  iinners, 
 and  perfons  juft  in  his  cafe;  although  to  no  purpofe,  as  to 
 yielding  him  any  fpecial  comfort).  He  anfwered,  "  I  would 
 "  have  others  come  to  Chrift,  if  I  muft  go  to  hell  myfclf." — 
 It  was  remarkable  in  this  fcafon  that  he  feemed  to  have  a  great 
 love  to  the  people  of  God,  and  nothing  affefted  him  fo  much 
 as  the  thoughts  of  being  feparated  from  them.  This  feemed 
 to  be  a  very  dreadful  part  of  the  hell  he  thought  himfelf  do^om- 
 
 cd  to. It  v.-as  likewifc  remarliablc,  that  in  this   feafcn  he 
 
 -5   G  was 
 
41 9      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 was  moft  diligent  in  the  life  of  all  means  for  his  foul's  falva- 
 tioii;  although  he  had  the  cleareft  view  of  the  infufficlency  of 
 means  to  affjid  him  help.  And  would  frequently  lay,  "  That 
 "  all  he  did,  fignified  nothing  at  all;"  and  yet  Avas  never  more 
 conftant  in  doing,  attending  fecret  and  family  prayer  daily, 
 and  furprifmgly  diligent  and  attentive  in  hearing  the  word  of 
 God  :  fo  that  he  neither  dcfpaired  of  mercy,  nor  yet  prcfumed 
 to  hope  upon  his  own  doi^igs,.  but  ufcd  means,  becaufe  ap- 
 pointed of  God  in  order  to  falvation;  and  becaufe  he  would 
 wait  upon  God  in  his  own  way. 
 
 After  he  had  continued  in  this  frame  of  mind  more  than  a 
 lij^sk,  while  I  was  difcourfing  publich',  he  feemed  to  have  a 
 lively,  foul-refreHiing  view  of  the  excellency  of  Chrift,  and 
 the  way  of  falvatiort  by  him,  which  melted  him  into  tears, 
 and  filled  him  with  admiration,  comfort,  fatisfaftion,  andpraife 
 to  God;  fince  which  he  has  appeared  to  be  a  humble,  devout, 
 and  affeftionate  Chriftian ;  ferious  and  exemplary  in  his  con- 
 verfation  and  behaviour,  frequently  complaining  of  his  bar- 
 rennefs,  his  want  of  fpiritual  warmth,  life,  and  a<fliviry,  and 
 yet  frequently  favoured  with  quickening  and  refrefhing  in- 
 fluences. And  in  all  refpefts,  fo  far  as  I  am  capable  to  judge, 
 he  bears  the  marks  and  characters  of  one ''created  anew  in 
 "  Chrift  Jefus  to  good  works." 
 
 His  ?eal  for  the  caufe  of  God  was  pleafing  to  me,  when  he 
 was  with  me  at  the  Forks  of  Delaware  in  February  laft. 
 There  being  an  old  Indian  at  the  place  where  I  preached,  who 
 threatened  to  bewitch  me  and  rhy  religious  people  who  ac- 
 companied me  there ;  this  man  prefcntly  challenged  him  to 
 do  his  worfl,  telling  him,  that  himfelf  had  been  as  great  a 
 conjurer  as  he,  and  that  notwithftanding  as  foon  as  he  felt 
 that  word  in  his  heart  which  thele  people  loved,  (meaning  the 
 word  of  God),  his  power  of  conjuring  immediately  left  liim. — 
 And  fo  it  would  you,  faid  he,  if  you  did  but  once  feel  it  in 
 your  heart ;  and  you  have  no  power  to  hurt  them,  nor  fo 
 much  as  to  touch  one  of  them,  ^c. 
 
 So  that  I  may  conclude  my  account  of  him,  by  obferving, 
 (in  allufion  to  what  was  faid  of  St  Paul),  that  he  now  zcaloufly 
 defends,  and  praiftically  "preaches  the  faith  which  he  once 
 
 "  deftroyed,''  or  at  leaft  was  inflrumental  of  obArufting- 
 
 jMay  God  have  the  glory  of  the  amazing  change  he  has 
 wrought  in  him ! 
 
 Lord's  day,  May  i8.  Difcourfcd  both  parts  of  the  day  from 
 Rev.  ill.  20.     There   appeared   fome   affeftionate  melting  to- 
 wards the  conclufion  of  the  forenoon  exercife,  and  one  or  two 
 inflances  of  frelh  awakening. In  the  intermilTion  of  pub- 
 lic 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  419 
 
 Jic  worlhip,  I  took  occafion  to  difcourfe  to  numbers  in  a  more 
 private  way,  on  the  kindnejs  and  patience  of  the  blefled  Re- 
 deemer vcifiand'ing  and  knockingy  in  continuing  his  gracious 
 calls  to  finners,  who  had  long  neglefted  and  abufed  his  grace  ; 
 which  feeraed  to  take  fome  effeft  upon  fundry. 
 
 In  the  afternoon,  divine  truths  were  attended  with  folem- 
 nity,  and  with  fome  tears,  although  there  was  not  that 
 powerful,  awakening,  and  quickening  influence,  which  in 
 times  paft  has  been  common  in  our  aifemblies.  The  appear- 
 ance of  the  audience  under  divine  truths,  was  comparatively 
 difcouraging ;  and  I  was  ready  to  fear,  that  God  was  about  co 
 withdraw  the  bleffed  influence  of  his  Spirit  from  us. 
 
 May  19.  Vifited  and  preached  to  my  people  from  A 6^8 
 XX.  18.  19.  and  endeavoured  to  re^ftify  their  notions  about 
 religious  affe£iions :  fhewing  them,  on  the  one  hand,  the  dc- 
 jirablentfs  of  religious  aifedlion,  tenJernefs,  and  fervent  en- 
 gagement in  the  worship  and  fervice  of  God,  when  fuch 
 afFeftion  flows  from  a  true  fpirltual  difcovery  of  divine  glo- 
 ries, from  a  jufl:Iy-afFefting  fenfe  of  the  tranfcendent  excel- 
 lency and  perfections  of  the  blefl"ed  God, — a  view  of  the 
 glory  and  lovelinefs  of  the  great  Redeemer :  and  that  fuch 
 views  of  divine  things,  will  naturally  excite  us  to  "  ferve  the 
 **  Lord  with  many  tears,"  with  much  afleclion  and  ferven- 
 cy, and  yet  "  with  all  humility  of  mind." — And,  on  the  other 
 hand,  obferving  the  finfulnefs  of  feeking  after  high  affedlions 
 immediately,  and  for  their  own  fakes,  that  is,  of  making 
 them  the  object  our  eye  and  heart  is  nextly  and  principally 
 fet  upon,  when  the  glory  of  God  ought  to  be  fo.  Shewed 
 them,  that  if  the  heart  be  dire£ily  and  chiefly  fixed  on  God, 
 and  the  foul  engaged  to  glorify  him,  fome  degree  of  religious 
 affecfVion  will  be  the  effeft  and  attendant  of  it.  But  to  feek 
 after  afledion,  dlre^ly  and  chiefly,  to  have  the  heart  princi- 
 pally fet  upon  that,  is  to  place  it  in  the  room  of  God  and  his 
 glory.  If  it  be  fought,  that  others  may  take  notice  of,  and 
 admire  us  for  our  fpirituality  and  forwardnefs  in  religion,  it 
 is  then  abominable  pride:  if  for  the  fake  of  feeling  the  piea- 
 fure  of  being  afFefteJ,  it  is  then  idolatry  and  felf-gratification. 
 — Laboured  alfo  to  expofe  the  difagreeabknefs  of  thofe  af- 
 fcftions  that  are  fometimes  wrought  up  in  perfons  by  the 
 power  of  fancy,  and  their  own  attempts  for  that  purpofe, 
 while  I  ftill  endeavoured  to  recommend  to  them  that  reli- 
 gious affe<Slion,  fervency,  and  devotion  which  ought  to  attend 
 all  our  religious  exercifes,  and  without  which  religion  will  be 
 but  an  empty  name  and  lifelefs  carcafe. 
 
 This  appeared  to  be  a  feafonable  difcourfe,  and  proved  very 
 3  G  2  fatisfa(flory 
 
420      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 fatisfaftory  to  fome  of  the  religious  people,  who  before  were 
 cxercifed  with  fome  difficulties  relating  to  this  point- 
 Afterwards  took  care  of,  and  gave  my  people  direftions  a- 
 b  )Ut  their  worldly  affairs. 
 
 May  24.  Vifited  the  Indians,  and  took  care  of  their  fecular 
 bufinefs,  which  they  are  not  able  to  manage  themfelves,  with- 
 out the  conftant  care  and  advice  of  others. 
 
 Afterwards  difcourfed  to  fome  particularly  about  their  fpi- 
 ritual  concerns. 
 
 Lord's  day,  May  21^.  Difcourfed  both  parts  of  the  day 
 from  John  xii.  44. — 48.  There  was  fome  degree  of  divine 
 power  attending  the  word  of  God.  Sundry  wept  and  ap- 
 peared confiderably  afFefted :  and  one  who  had  long  been 
 under  fpiritual  trouble,  now  obtained  cleamefs  and  comfort, 
 and  appeared  to  "  rejoice  in  God  her  Saviour."  It  was  a  day 
 of  grace  and  divine  goodnefs;  a  day  wherein  fomething,  I 
 truft,  was  done  for  the  caufe  of  God  among  my  people  :  a 
 feafon  of  fweetnefs  and  comfort  to  divers  of  the  religious 
 people,  although  there  was  not  that  powerful  influence 
 upon  the  congregation  which  was  common  fome  months 
 ago. 
 
 Lord's  day,  June  i.  1746.  Preached  both  forenoon  and 
 afternoon  from  Matth.  xi.  27.  28.  The  prefence  of  God 
 feemed  to  be  in  the  affembly,  and  nurr.bers  were  confiderably 
 melted  and  affefted  under  divine  truths.  There  was  a  de- 
 firable  appearance  in  the  congregation  in  general,  an  earned 
 attention  and  agreeable  tendernefs,  and  it   feemed  as  if  God 
 
 defigned  to  vifit  us  with  further  fhowers  of  divine  grace. 1 
 
 then  baptized  ten  perfons,  five  adults  and  five  children,  and 
 was  not  a  little  refrefhed  with  this  *'  addition  made  to  the 
 *'  church  of  fuch  as  (I  hope)  fhall  be  faved." 
 
 I  have  reafon  to  hope,  that  God  has  lately  (at  and  fince 
 our  celebration  of  the  Lord's  fupper)  brought  home  lo  him- 
 fclf  fundry  fouls  who  bad  long  been  under  fpiritual  trouble 
 and  concern  t  although  there  have  been  few  inltances  of  per- 
 fons lately  awakened  out  of  a  date  of  fecurity.  And  thofe 
 comforted  of  late,  feem  to  be  brought  in,  in  a  more  filent 
 way,  neither  their  concern  nor  confolation  being  fo  powerful 
 and  remarkable,  as  appeared  among  thofe  more  fuddenly 
 wrought  upon  in  the  beginning  of  this  work  of  grace. 
 
 June  6.  Difcourfed  to  my  people  from  part  of  If.  liii — 
 The  divine  prefence  appeared  to  be  amongft  us  in  fome  mea- 
 f ure.  Divers  perfons  were  much  melted  and  refrefhed ;  and 
 one  man  in  particular,  who  had  long  been  under  concern  for 
 his  foul,  was  now  brought  to  fee  and  feci,  in   a  very  lively 
 
 manner^ 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  421 
 
 jnanner,  the  impoffibility  of  his  doing  any  thing  to  help  him- 
 felf,  or  to  bring  him  into  the  favour  of  God,  by  his  tears, 
 prayers,  and  other  religious  performances ;  and  found  himfelf 
 undone  as  to  any  power  or  goodnefs  of  his  own,  and  that  there 
 was  no  way  left  him,  but  to  leave  himfelf  with  God  to  be  dif- 
 pofed  of  as  he  pleafed. 
 
 June  7.  Being  defired  by  the  Reverend  Mr  William 
 Tennent  to  be  his  afflftant  in  the  adminiftration  of  the  Lord's 
 fupper;  my  people  alfo  being  invited  to  attend  the  facrmnefital 
 folemnity,  they  cheerfully  embraced  the  opportunity,  and 
 tills  day  attended  the  preparatory  fervices  with  me. 
 
 Lord's  day,  June  8.  Moft  of  my  people,  who  had  been 
 communicants  at  the  Lord's  table  before,  being  prefent  at 
 this  facramental  occafion,  communicated,  with  others,  in 
 this  holy  ordinance,  at  the  defire,  and,  I  truft,  to  the  fatif- 
 faclion  and  comfort  of  numbers  of  God's  people,  who  had 
 longed  to  fee  this  day,  and  whofe  hearts  had  rejoiced  in  this 
 work  of  grace  among  the  Indians,  which  prepared  the  way  for 
 what  appeared  fo  agreeable  at  this  time. 
 
 Thofe  of  my  people  who  communicated,  feemed  in  general 
 agreeably  affefted  at  the  Lord's  table,  and  feme  of  them  con- 
 fiderably  melted  with  the  love  of  Chrift ;  although  they  were 
 not  fo  remarkably  refrefhed  and  feafted  at  this  time,  as  when 
 I  adminiftered  this  ordinance  to  them  in  our  own  congrega- 
 tion only. 
 
 Some  of  the  hy-flanders  were  afFefted  with  feeing  thefe, 
 who  had  been  "  aliens  from  the  commonwealth  of  Ifrael, 
 *'  and  ftrangers  to  the  covenant  of  promife,"  who  of  all  men 
 had  lived  "  without  God,  and  without  hope  in  the  world,'* 
 now  brought  near  to  God  as  his  profefling  people,  and  feal- 
 ing  covenant  with  him,  by  a  folemn  and  devout  attendance 
 upon  this  facred  ordinance.  And  as  nunfibers  of  God's  people 
 were  refreflied  with  this  fight,  and  thereby  excited  to  blefs 
 God  for  the  enlargement  of  his  kingdom  in  the  world,  fo 
 fome  others  (I  was  told)  were  awakened  by  it,  apprehending 
 the  danger  they  were  in  of  being  themfelves  finally  cajl  outj 
 while  they  faw  others,  '*  from  the  eaft  and  wcfl,"  preparing, 
 and  hopefully  prepared  in  fome  good  meaftire,  to  "  fit  down 
 *'  in  the  kingdom  of  God." 
 
 At  this  fcafon  others  of  my  people  alfo,  who  were  not 
 communicants,  were  confiderably  affected ;  convidions  were 
 revived  in  divers  inftances ;  and  one  (the  man  particularly 
 mentioned  in  my  Journal  of  the  6th  inflant)  obtained  comfort 
 and  fatisfaflion ;  and  has  fince  given  me  fuch  an  account  of 
 Itis  fpiritual  exercifes,  and  the  manner  in  which  he  obtained 
 
 relief, 
 
4i2      DIVINE     GRACE     DISPLAYED 
 
 relief,  as  appears  very  hopeful.  It  fcems  as  if  he  "  who  coirt- 
 "^  manded  the  light  to  (hine  out  of  darknefs,"  had  now  "  Ihi- 
 *'  ned  in  his  heart,  and  given  him  the  light  of"  an  experimcn- 
 lal  "knowledge  of  the  glory  of  God  in  the  face  of  Jcius 
 ''  Chrift." 
 
 June  9.  A  confiderable  number  of  my  people  met  together 
 early  in  the  day  in  a  retired  place  in  the  woods,  and  prayed, 
 fang,  and  converfed  of  divine  things,  and  were  feen  by  lome 
 religious  perfons  of  the  white  people,  to  be  affected  and  en- 
 gaged, and  divers  of  them  in  tears  in  thefe  religious  exer- 
 cifes. 
 
 Afterwards  they  attended  the  concluding  exercifes  of  the 
 facramental  folemnity,  and  then  returned  home,  divers  of 
 them  "  rejoicing  for  all  the  goodnefs  of  God"  they  had  leen 
 and  felt :  fo  that  this  appeared  to  be  a  profitable,  as  well  as  « 
 comfortable  feafon  to  numbers  of  my  congregation.  And 
 their  being  prefent  at  this  occafion,  and  a  number  of  thera 
 communicating  at  the  Lord's  table  with  others  of  God^s 
 people,  was,  1  trufl,  for  the  honour  of  God,  and  the  intereiO: 
 of  religion  in  thefe  parts,  as  numbers,  I  have  reafon  to  think, 
 were  quickened  by  means  of  it. 
 
 June  13.  Preached  to  my  people  upon  the  new  creature, 
 from  2  Cor.  v.  ly.  The  prefence  of  God  appeared  to  be  in 
 the  aflembly. — It  was  a  fweet  and  agreeable  meeting,  where- 
 in the  people  of  God  were  refrefhed  and  ftrengthened,  behold- 
 ing their  faces  in  the  glafs  of  God's  word,  and  finding  in  thcm- 
 iclves  the  rna.rks  and  Lineaments  ot  the  nevj  creatiire.- 
 Some  fumers  under  concern,  were  alfo  renewcdly  affefted ; 
 and  afrefh  engaged  for  the  fecuring  of  their  eternal  inte- 
 refts. 
 
 Baptized  five  perfons  at  this  time,  three  adults  and  two 
 children.  One  of  thefe  was  the  very  aged  ivoman  of  whofe 
 cxercife  I  gave  an  account  in  my  Journal  of  December  26, 
 She  now  gave  me  a  very  punftual,  rational,  and  fatisfaftory  ac- 
 count of  the  remarkable  change  fhe  experienced  fome  months 
 after  the  beginning  of  her  concern,  which,  I  mufi:  fay,  ap- 
 peared to  be  the  genuine  operations  of  the  divine  Spirit,  fo 
 far  as  I  am  ca.pabk  of  judging.  And  although  fhe  was  be- 
 come fo  chiidifh  through  old  age,  that  I  could  do  nothing  in  a 
 \vay  of  que/lioning  with  her,  nor  fcarcc  make  her  undcifiand 
 an}'  that  I  aikcd  her ;  yet  when  I  let  her  alone  to  go  on  with 
 her  own  flory,  flie  could  give  a  very  dillindl:  and  particular  re- 
 lation of  the  many  and  various  exercifes  of  foul  fhe  had  ex- 
 perienced ;  fo  deep  were  the  imprefTions  left  upon  her  mind 
 by   tliat  influence  and  exercife  fhe  had  been  under  I     And  I 
 
 have 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  423 
 
 have  great  reafon  to  hope,  fhe  is  born  anew  in  her  old  age, 
 
 fhe   being,  I  pre  fume,  upwards  oi  fourjcore. 1  had  good 
 
 hopes  of  the  other  adults,  and  trufl:  they  are  fuch  as  God  will 
 own  "  in  the  day  when  he  makes  up  his  jewels." 
 
 June  1 9.  Vifited  my  people  with  two  of  the  Reverend  cor- 
 refpondcnts.  Spent  fome  time  in  converfation  with  fome  of 
 them  upon  fpiritual  things ;  and  took  fome  care  of  their 
 worldly  concerns. 
 
 This  day  makes  up  a  complete  year  from  the  firfl  time  of 
 my  preaching  to  thefe  Indians  in  New-Jerfey. VV^hat  ama- 
 zing things  has  God  wrought  in  this  fpace  of  time  for  thefs 
 poor  people  !  What  a  furprifmg  change  appears  in  their  tem- 
 pers and  behaviour !  How  are  morofe  and  favage  Pagans  in 
 this  fliort  fpace  of  time  transformed  into  agreeable,  affeftion- 
 ate,  and  humble  Chriftians !  and  their  drunken  and  Pagan  bowl- 
 ings, turned  into  devout  and  fervent  prayers  and  praifes  to 
 God!  They  "who  were  fometimes  darknefs,  are  now  be- 
 '*  come  light  in  the  Lord.  May  they  walk  as  children  of  the 
 "  light,  and  of  the  day.  And  now  to  him  that  is  of  powder  to 
 **  ftabliih  them  according  to  the  gofpel,  and  the  preaching  of 
 
 "  Chrift 'To    God  only  wife,    be  glory,    through  Jefus 
 
 "  Chrift,   for  ever  and  ever !     Amen.'' 
 
 Before  I  conclude  the  prefent  Journal,  I  would  make  a  few 
 general  remarks  upon  what  to  me  appears  worthy  of  notice, 
 relating  to  the  continued  work  of  grace  among  my  people. 
 
 And,  fir/i,  I  cannot  but  take  notice  that  I  have  in  the  ge- 
 neral, ever  fmce  my  firft  coming  among  thefe  Indians  in  New- 
 Jerfey,  been  favoured  with  that  affiflance,  which  (to  me)  is 
 zmcommon,  in  preaching  Chrifl  crucified,  and  making  him  the 
 centre  and  mark  to  which  all  my  difcourfes  among  them  were 
 direftcd. 
 
 It  was  the  principal  fcope  and  drift  of  all  my  difcourfes  to 
 this  people  for  fcveral  months  together,  (after  having  taught 
 them  fomething  of  the  being  and  perfeiflions  of  God,  his  cre- 
 ation of  man  in  a  ftate  of  re6iitude  and  happinels,  and  the 
 obligations  mankind  were  thence  under  to  love  and  honour 
 him),  to  lead  them  into  an  acquaintance  with  their  deplorable 
 ftate  by  nature,  as  fallen  creatures:  their  inability  to  extri- 
 cate and  deliver  themfelves  from  it :  the  utter  infu-ff:ciency<ii 
 any  ^^/(rr/f^/ reformations  and  amendments  of  life,  or  of  any 
 religious  performances,  they  were  capable  of,  while  In  this 
 ftate,  to  bring  them  into  the  favour  of  God,  and  intereft 
 them  in  his  eternal  mercy.  And  thence  to  ftiew  them  their 
 f.bfolut c  ntcd  of  Chrlil  to  redeem  and  (xyc  them  from  the  mi~ 
 
 fcry 
 
424    REMARKS  ON-THE  WORK  OF  GRACE 
 
 fery  of  their  fallen  {[ate. To  open  his  all-fufficiency  anrf 
 
 willingnefs  to  fave  the  chief  of  fmners. The  freenefs  and 
 
 ?';V/»(?j- of  his  divine  grace,  propofed  "without  money,  and 
 "  without  price,"  to  all  that  will  accept  the  offer. — And 
 thereupon  to  prefs  them  tuifhout  delay  to  betake  themfelves  to 
 him,  under  a  fcnfc  of  their  mifery  and  undone  eftate,  for  re- 
 lief and   everlafting   falvation. And  to  ihew  them  the  a- 
 
 bundant  encouragement  the  gofpel  propofes  to  needy,  perifh- 
 ing,  and  helplefs  fmners,  in  order  to  engage  them  fo  to  do. 
 Thefe  things  I  repeatedly  and  largely  infifted  upon  from 
 time  to  time. 
 
 And  1  have  oftentimes  remarked  with  admiration,  that 
 whatever  fubje£l  I  have  been  treating  upon,  after  having  fpent 
 t\\x\?,  fufficient  to  explain  and  illuflrate  the  truths  contained 
 therein,  '  have  been  naturally  and  eajily  led  to  Chrijl  as 
 the  fuhflance  of  every  fubjeft.  If  I  treated  on  the  being  and 
 glorious  perfeftions  of  God,  I  was  thence  naturally  led  to 
 difcourfe  of  Chrift  as  the  only  "way  to  the  Father." — If  I  at- 
 tempted to  open  the  deplorable  mifery  of  our  fallen  ftate,  it 
 v/as  natural  from  thence  to  fhew  the  neceffity  of  Chrift  to 
 undertake  for  us,  to  atone  for  our  fins,  and  to  redeem  us  from 
 the  power  of  them. — If  I  taught  the  commands  of  God,  and 
 /hewed  our  violation  of  them,  this  brought  me  in  the  mofl 
 eafy  and  natural  way,  to  fpeak  of,  and  recommend  the 
 Lord  Jcfus  Chrifl,  as  one  who  had  "magnified  the  law"  we 
 had  broken,  and  who  was  "become  the  end  of  it  for  righ- 
 **  teoufnefs,  t6  every  one  that  believes."  And  never  did  I 
 find  fo  much  freedom  and  alliftancc  in  making  all  the  various 
 lines  of  my  difcourfcs  meet  together,  and  centre  in  Chrifl,  as 
 I  have  frequently  done  among  thefe  Indians. 
 
 Sometimes  when  I  have  had  thoughts  of  offering  but  a  few 
 words  upon  feme  particular  fubject,  and  faw  no  occafion, 
 nor  indeed  much  room  for  any  confiderable  enlargement, 
 there  has  at  unav.'arcs  appeared  fuch  a  fountain  of  gofpel- 
 grace  fhining  forth  in,  or  naturally  refuklng  from  a  juft  ex- 
 plication of  it,  and  Chiift  has  feemed  in  fuch  a  manner  to  be 
 pointed  out  as  the  fubftance  of  what  I  was  conlidermg  and 
 explaining,  that  I  have  been  drawn  in  a  v/ay  not  only  eafy 
 and  natural,  proper  and  pertinent,  but  almoii  unavoidable  to 
 difcourfe  of  him,  either  in  regard  of  his  undertaking,  incar- 
 nation, fatisfa(5tion,  admirable  fitnefs  for  the  work  of  man's 
 redemption,  or  the  infinite  need  that  finners  fland  in  of  an 
 intcreil  in  him ;  which  has  opened  the  way  for  a  continued 
 firain  of  gofpcl-iavitation  to  perifhing  fouls,  to  come  eiyipty 
 
 and. 
 
AMONG     T  H  E     INDIANS.  425 
 
 and  naked,  weary  and  heavy  laden,  and  caft  themfelvcs  upon 
 him. 
 
 And  as  I  have  been  remarkably  influenced  and  affifted  to 
 dwell  up.m  the  Ljrd  Jefus  Chrift,  and  the  way  of  falvation 
 by  him,  in  the  general  current  of  my  difcourfes  here,  and 
 have  been,  at  times,  furpriiingly  furnifhed  with  pertincnn 
 matter  relating  to  him,  and  the  defign  of  his  incarnation  :  fo 
 I  have  been  no  lefs  alTilted  oftentimes  in  regard  of  an  advan- 
 tageous manner  of  opening  the  myfteries  of  divine  grace,  and 
 reprefentingthe  infinite  excellencies,  and  "  unfearchable  riches 
 **  of  Chrift,"  as  well  as  of  recommending  him  to  the  accept- 
 ance of  perifhing  finners.  I  have  frequently  been  enabled 
 to  reprefent  the  divine  glory,  the  infinite  precioufnels  and 
 tranlcendent  lovelinefs  of  the  great  Redeemer ;  the  fuitable- 
 nefs  of  his  perfon  and  purchafe  to  fupply  the  wants,  and  an- 
 fwer  the  utmofl  defires  of  immortal  fouls. —  To  open  the  in- 
 fiiiite  riches  of  his  grace,  and  the  wonderful  encouragement 
 propofed  in  the  gofpel  to  unworthy,  helplcfs  finners. — To 
 call,  invite,  and  befeech  them  to  come  and  give  up  themfelves 
 to  him,  and  be  reconciled  to  God  through  him. —  To  expofi:u- 
 late  with  them  refpefting  their  neglect  of  one  fo  infinitely 
 lovely,  and  freely  offered. — And  this  mfuch  a  manner,  with 
 fuch  freedom,  pertinency,  pathos,  and  application  to  the 
 confcience,  as  (I  am  fure)  I  never  could  have  made  myfelf 
 malter  of  by  the  mofi:  afiiduous  application  of  mind  I  am  ca- 
 pable of.  And  have  frequently  at  fuch  feafons  been  furprl- 
 fingly  helped  in  adapting  my  difcourfes  to  the  capacities  of  my 
 people,  and  bringing  them  down  into  fuch  eafy,  vulgar,  and 
 familiar  methods  of  expreifion,  as  has  rendered  them  intelli- 
 gible even  to  Pagans. 
 
 I  do  not  mention  thefe  things  as  a  recommendation  of  my 
 own  performances ;  for,  I  am  fure,  I  found,  from  time  to 
 time,  that  I  had  no  Ikill  or  wifdom  for  my  great  work  ;  and 
 knew  not  how  "to  chufe  out  acceptable  words"  proper  to  ad- 
 drefs  poor  benighted  Pagans  with.  But  thus  God  was  pleafed 
 to  help  mc,  "not  to  know  any  thing  among  them,  fave  Jefus 
 "  Chrifi,  and  him  crucified."  Thus  I  was  enabled  to  fhew 
 them  their  mifery  and  undonenefs  without  him,  and  to  repre- 
 fent his  complete  yT/w^/j"  to  redeem  and  fave  them. 
 
 And  this  was  the  preaching  God  made  ufe  of  for  the  awa- 
 kening of  finners,  and  the  propagation  of  this  "  work  of  grace 
 
 "  among  the  Indians."- And  it  was  remarkable,  from  time 
 
 to  time,  that  when  I  was  favoured  with  any  fpecia!  freedom, 
 in  difcourfing  of  the  "ability  and  wlUingncfs  oi  Chrift  to  fave 
 *'  finners/'  and  the  "need  they  iiood  in  ©f  fuch  a  Saviour," 
 
 ?  H  fharc 
 
4i6  REMARKSONTHEWORK  OF  GRACTE 
 
 there  was  then  the  greateft  appearance  of  divine  power  in  a- 
 Wakening  numbers  of  fecure  louls,  promoting  convi<Elions  be- 
 gun, and  comforting  the  diftrcffed. 
 
 I  have  fometimcs  formerly,  in  reading  the  apoftlc's  difcourfe 
 to  Cornelius,  (A(fls  x.),  admired  to  fee  him  fo  quickly  intro- 
 duce the  Lord  Jefus  Chrifl  into  his  fermon,  and  fo  entirely 
 dwell  upon  him  through  the  whole  of  it,  obferving  him  in  this 
 point  very  widely  to  dilfer  from  many  of  our  modern  preach- 
 ers :  but  latterly  this  has  not  feemed  ftrange,  fince  Chrlft  has 
 appeared  to  be  t\\t  Jubjhnce  of  the  gofpcl,  and  the  centre  in 
 which  the  feveral  lines  of  divine  revelation  meet.  Although 
 I  am  flill  fenfible  there  are  many  things  neccfTary  to  be  Ipoken 
 to  perfons  under  Pagan  darknefs,  in  order  to  make  way  for  a 
 proper  introdu61ion  of  the  name  of  Chrilt,  and  his  underta- 
 king in  behalf  of  fallen  man. 
 
 Secondly,  It  is  wo)thy  of  remark,  that  numbers  of  thefe 
 people  are  brought  to  a  ftriifl  compliance  with  the  rules  of 
 viorality  and  fobriety,  and  to  a  confcientious  performance  of 
 the  external  duties  oi  Chriftianity,  by  the  internal  power  and 
 influence  of  divine  truths  (the  peculiar  doftrines  of  grace)  up- 
 on their  minds ;  without  their  having  thefe  moral  duties  fre- 
 quently repeated  and  inculcated  upon  them,  and  the  contrary 
 vices  particularly  expofed  and  fpoken  againff.  What  has 
 been  the  generaiy?;v7/«  and  dr'ift  of  my  preaching  among  thefe 
 Indians;  what  were  the  truths  I  principally  infifted upon,  and 
 h<sw  I  was  irffluenced  and  enabled  to  dwell  from  time  to  time 
 upon  the  peculiar  dodrincs  of  grace,  I  have  already  obferved 
 in  the  preceding  remark.  Thofe  do(flrines,  which  had  the 
 mofi:  direft  tendency  to  humble  the  fallen  creature ;  to  fliew 
 him  the  mifery  of  his  natural  ftate  ;  to  bring  him  down  to  the 
 foot  oi  fovereign  inercy  ;  and  to  exalt  the  great  Redeemer, 
 difcover  his  tranfcendent  excellency  and  infinite  precioufnefs, 
 and  fo  to  recommend  him  to  the  finner's  acceptance,  were  the 
 fubjci^-matter  of  what  was  delivered  in  public  and  private  to 
 them,  and  from  time  to  time  repeated  and  inculcated  upon 
 them. 
 
 And  God  was  pleafcd  to  give  thefe  divine  truths  fuch  a 
 powerful  influence  upon  the  minds  of  thefe  people,  and  fo  to 
 blcfs  them  for  the  efiedlual  awakening  of  numbers  of  them, 
 that  their  lives  were  quickly  reformed,  without  my  infifting 
 upon  the  preceptf  of  morality,  and  fpending  time  in  repeated 
 harangues  upon  external  duties.  There  was  indeed  no  room 
 for  any  kind  of  difcourfes  but  thofe  that  refpefted  the  e/fen- 
 iials  of  religion,  and  the  experimental  knowledge  of  divine 
 things,  whilft  there  were  fi*  many  inquiring  daily,   not  how 
 
 they 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  427 
 
 they  fliould  regulate  their  external  conduft,  (for  that,  perfons 
 "who  are  honeftly  difpofed  to  comply  with  duty,  when  known, 
 may,  in  ordinary  cafes,  be  ealily  fati'^fied  abDUt)  ;  but  how 
 they  fliould  cfcape  from  the  wrath  they  feared  and  felt  a  de- 
 fert  of, — obtain  an  effediual  change  of  heart, — get  an  intereft 
 in  Chrift, — and  come  to  the  enjoyment  of  eternal  bleffcdnefs. 
 So  that  my  great  "work  flill  was  to  lead  them  into  a  fur- 
 ther view  of  their  utter  undoncnefs  in  themfeives,  the  total  de- 
 pravity and  corruption  of  their  hearts;  that  there  was  no 
 manner  of  goodnefs  in  them;  no  good  difpofitions  nor  de- 
 fires ;  no  love  10  God,  nor  delight  in  his  commands :  but,  on 
 the  contrary,  hatred,  enmity,  and  all  manner  of  wickednefs 
 reigning  in  them. — And  at  the  fame  time  to  open  to  them  the 
 glorious  and  complete  remedy  provided  in  Chrift  for  helplefs 
 perifhing  fmne-.s,  and  offered  freely  to  thofe  who  have  no 
 goodnefs  of  their  own,  no  ''works  of  righteoufnefs  which 
 •*'  they  have  done,"  to  recommend  them  to  God. 
 
 Tliis  was  the  continued  ftrain  of  my  preaching ;  this  my 
 great  concern  and  conftant  endeavour,  fo  to  enlighten  the 
 mind,  as  thereby  duly  to  affeft  the  heart,  and,  as  far  as  poll 
 Cble,  give  perfons  ^.fenfe  and  feeling  of  thefe  precious  and 
 important  doftrines  of  grace,  at  leaft,  fo  far  as  means  might 
 conduce  to  it.  And  thefe  were  the  doftrines, — this  the  me- 
 thod of  preaching  which  were  blefled  of  God  for  the  awa- 
 kening, and,  I  trufl,  the  faving  converfion  of  numbers  of 
 fouls,— -and  which  were  made  the  means  of  producing  a  re- 
 markable reformation  among  the  hearers  in  general. 
 
 When  thefe  truths   were  felt  at  heart,  there   was   now   no 
 
 vice  unreformed,— no  external  duty  negle<fl:ed. Drunken- 
 
 nefs,  the  darling  vice,  was  broken  off  from,  and  fcarce  an  in- 
 ftance  of  it  known  among  my  hearers  for  months  together. 
 The  abufive  praftice  of  hujl^ands  and  wives  in  putting  away 
 each  other,  and  taking  others  in  their  ftead,  was  quickly  re- 
 formed; fo  that  there  are  three  or  four  couple  who  have  vo- 
 luntarily difmiffed  thofe  they  had  wrongfully  taken,  and  now 
 live  together  again    in  love  and  peace.     The  fame  might  be 
 
 faid  of  all  other  vicious  praflices. The   reformation   was 
 
 general ;  and  all  fpringing  from  the  itiiernal  inlluence  of  di- 
 vine truths  upon  their  hearts ;  and  not  from  nn}'  external  re- 
 ftraints,  or  becaufe  they  had  heard  thefe  vices  particularly 
 cxpofed,  and  repeatedly  fpoken  againft:  for  fomc  of  them 
 I  never  fo  much  as  mentioned ;  particularly  that  of  the  parting 
 of  men  and  their  wives,  till  fome,  having  their  confcience  a- 
 wakened  by  Cod's  word,  came,  and,  of  their  own  accord, 
 confcffed  tliemfelves  guilty  in  that  rcfpedt.     And  when  I  didl 
 
 :?   H  2  at 
 
428  REMARKS  ON  THE  WORK  OF  GRACE! 
 
 at  any  time  mention  their  wicked  praftices,  and  the  fins  they 
 •were  guilty  of  contrary  to  the  light  of  nature,  it  was  not  with 
 defign,  nor  indeed  with  any  hope,  ot  working  an  efFectual 
 reformation  in  their  external  manners  by  this  means,  for  I 
 knew,  that  while  the  tree  remained  coirupt,  the  fru:t  would 
 naturally  be  fo  5  but  with  defign  to  lead  them,  by  obferving 
 the  wickednefs  of  their  lives,  to  a  view  of  the  corruption  of 
 their  hearts,  and  fo  to  convince  them  of  the  ncceflity  of  a  re- 
 novation of  nature,  and  to  excite  them  with  utmoft  diligence, 
 to  feek  after  that  great  change,  which,  if  once  obtained,  I 
 was  fenfible,  would  of  courfe  produce  a  reformation  of  exter- 
 nal manners  in  every  refpe^l. 
 
 And  as  all  vice  was  reformed  upon  their  feeling  the  power 
 of  thefe  truths  upon  their  hearts,  fo  the  external  duties  of 
 Chriftianity  were  complied  with,  and  confcientioufly  perform- 
 ed from  the  fame  internal  influence ;  family-prayer  fet  up, 
 and  conflantly  maintained,  unlefs  among  fome  ftw  more  late- 
 ly come,  who  had  felt  little  of  this  divine  influence.  This 
 duty  conftantly  performed  even  in  fome  families  where  there 
 v/ere  non«  but  females,  and  fcarce  a  prayerlefs  perlon  to  be 
 found  among  near  an  hundred  of  them.  The  Lord's  day  fe- 
 rioully  and  religioufly  obfcrved,  and  care  taken  by  parents  to 
 keep  their  children  orderly  upon  that  facred  day,  <tc.  And 
 this,  not  becaufe  I  had  driven  them  to  the  performance  of 
 thefe  duties  by  a  frequent  inculcating  of  therr,  but  becaufe 
 they  had/d/f  the  power  of  God's  word  upon  their  hearts, — 
 were  made  fenfible  of  their  fin  and  mifery,  and  thence  could 
 not  but  pray,  and  comply  with  every  thing  they  knew  was  du" 
 ty,  from  what  they  felt  ivithin  themlelves.  When  their 
 hearts  were  touched  with  a  fenfe  of  their  eternal  concern- 
 ments, they  could  pray  with  great  freedom,  as  v  ell  as  fervercy, 
 without  being  at  the  trouble  firfl  to  learn  fct  forms  for  that 
 purpofe.  And  fome  of  them  who  were  fuddenly  awakened  at 
 their  firfl  coming  arrong  us,  were  brought  to  pray  and  cry 
 for  mercy  with  utmoff  im.portunity,  without  ever  being  in- 
 /Iruffed  in  the  duty  of  prayer,  or  fo  much  as  once  dirctSfed  to 
 a  performance  of  it. 
 
 The  happy  eifefis  of  thefe  peculiar  dc^irincs  of  grace, 
 ^vhich  I  have  fo  much  infifled  upon  with  this  people,  plainly 
 diicovcr,  even  to  demonftration,  that  inflead  of  their  opening 
 a  door  to  licentioufnefs,  (as  many  vainly  imagine,  and  ilander- 
 oufly  infinu^te),  they  hs\e  adireff  contrary  tendency  :  fo  that 
 a  clofe  application,  ^Jerfe  ar^d  feeling  of  them,  will  have  the 
 mofl  powerful  influence  toward  the  renovation,  and  efe^ual 
 reformation  both  of  heart  and  life.    . 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  424? 
 
 And  happy  experience,  as  well  as  the  word  of  God,  and 
 the  example  of  Chrill:  and  his  apoflles,  has  taught  me,  that 
 that  method  of  preaching,  which  is  beft  fuitcd  to  awaken  in 
 mankind  a  fenfe  and  lively  apprehenfion  of  their  depravity 
 and  mifery  in  z  fallen  fiate, — to  excite  them  earneftly  to  leek 
 after  a  change  of  heart,  and  to  jiy  for  refuge  to  free  and  fove- 
 reign  grace  in  Chriff,  as  the  only  hope  Jtt  before  them,  is  like 
 to  be  moft  fuccefsfuL  toward  the  reformation  of  their  exter- 
 nal conduct. — 1  have  found  that  clofe  addrefles,  and  foleran 
 applications  of  divine  truth  to  the  confcience,  tend  directly  to 
 flrike  death  to  the  root  of  all  vice  :  while  Imooth  and  plauli. 
 ble  harangues  upon  -moral  virtues  and  external  duties,  at  beft 
 are  like  to  do  no  more  than  lop  off  the  branches  of  corrup- 
 tion, while  the  root  of  all  vice  remains  ftill  untouched. 
 
 A  view  of  the  blelTed  effect  of  honeft  endeavours  to  bring 
 home  divine  truths  to  the  confcience,  and  duly  to  affect  the 
 heart  with  them,  has  often  minded  me  of  thole  words  of  our 
 Lord,  (which  I  have  thought  might  be  a  proper  exhortation 
 for  minirters  in  refpe£l  of  their  treating  with  others,  as  well 
 as  for  pcrfons  in  general  with  regard  to  themfelvei),  "  Cleanfe 
 '^  iirft  the  infide  of  the  cup  and  platter,  that  the  outfide  may 
 "  be  clean  alfo."  Cleanfe,  fays  he,  the  infide,  that  the  out- 
 fide may  be  clean.  Q^  d.  The  only  effectual  way  to  have  the 
 outfide  clean,  is  to  begin  with  ivhat  is  ivithin ;  and  if  the 
 fountain  be  purified,  the  ftreams  will  naturally  be  pure.  And 
 raofl  certain  it  is,  if  we  can  awaken  in  finners  a  lively  fenfe  of 
 their  inward  pollution  and  depravity, — their  need  of  a  change 
 of  heart,  and  fo  engage  them  to  leek  after /«u'/7r/^  cleanfing, 
 their  external  defilement  will  naturally  be  cieanfed,  their  vi- 
 cious ways  oi courfe  be  reformed,  and  their  converfaiion  and 
 behaviour  become  regular. 
 
 Now,  although  I  cannot  pretend  that  the  reformation  a- 
 mong  ray  people,  does,  in  every  Inliance,  fpring  from  a  fa- 
 ying change  of  heart;  yet  I  may  truly  fay,  it  flov/s  from  fome 
 heart-affe£}ing  view  and  fenfe  of  divine  truths  that  all  have 
 had  in  a  greater  or  lefTer  degree. 
 
 I  do  not  intend,  by  what  1  have  obferved  here,  to  reprefeqt 
 the  preaching  of  ni'jrality,  and  prelfing  perfons  to  the  exter- 
 nal performance  of  duty,  to  be  altogether  unneceilary  and 
 ulelefs  at  arty  time-  and  efpecially  at  times  when  there  is  lefs 
 of  divine  power  attending  the  means  of  grace ; — when  for 
 want  of  internal  influences,  there  is  need  of  external  re- 
 ftraints.  It  is  doubtlefs  among  the  things  that  "  ought  to  be 
 ,^,'  done,"  while  "others  are  not  to  be  left  undone." — But 
 V'hat  I  principally  defigned  by  this  remark,  was  to  difcover 
 
 plain 
 
430  REMARKS  ON  THE  WORK  OF  GRACE 
 
 plain  matter  of  faft,  viz.  That  the  reformation,  the  fobriety, 
 and  external  compliance  with  the  rules  and  duties  of  Chriftia- 
 nity,  appearing  among  my  people,  are  not  the  efFe6l  of  any  mere 
 do6lrinal  inftruftion,  or  merely  rational  view  uf  the  beauty  of 
 morality,  but  from  the  internal  power  and  influence  that  di- 
 vine truths  (the  foul-humbling  doftrines  of  grace)  have  had 
 npon  their  hearts. 
 
 Thirdly,  1 1  is  remarkable,  that  God  has  fo  continued  and  renew- 
 ed the  fhowers  of  his  grace  here  : — fo  quickly  fet  up  his  vifjblc 
 kingdom  among  thefe  people  ;  and  (of?niled  upon  them  in  rela- 
 tion to  their  acquirement  of  knowledge,  both  divine  and  human. 
 It  is  now  near  a  year  fmce  the  beginning  of  this  gracious  out- 
 pouring of  the  divine  Spirit  among  them  ;  and  although  it  has 
 often  feemed  to  decline  and  abate  for  fome  fhort  ipace  of 
 time,  (as  may  be  obferved  by  feveral  paflages  of  my  Journal, 
 ■where  1  have  endeavoured  to  note  things  juft  as  they  appear- 
 ed to  me  from  time  to  time);  yet  the  fhower  has  leemed  to 
 be  rer.ev.'ed,  and  the  work  of  grace  revived  again  :  lo  that  a 
 divine  influence  feems  flill  apparently  to  attend  the  means  of 
 grace,  in  a  greater  or  lefs  degree,  ia  mofl:  of  our  meetings  for 
 religious  exercifes  :  whereby  religious  perfons  are  refrefhed, 
 ilrengthened,  and  eflabliflied, — convictions  revived  and  pro- 
 moted in  many  inflances, — and  fome  few  perfons  newly  awa- 
 Icened  from  time  to  time.  Although  it  mufl  be  acknowled- 
 ged, that  for  fome  time  paft,  there  has,  in  the  general,  ap- 
 peared a  more  manifeft:  decline  of  this  work,  and  the  divine 
 Spirit  has  feemed,  in  a  confiderable  mcafure,  withdrawn,  c- 
 fpecially  in  regard  of  his  awakening  influences;  fo  that  the 
 firangeis  who  come  latterly,  are  not  feized  with  concern  as 
 formerly  ;  and  fome  few  who  have  been  much  aifcifted  with 
 tlivine  truths  in  time  paft,  now  appear  lefs  concerned.  Yet 
 (bleffed  be  God)  there  is  Hill  an  appearance  of  divine  power 
 and  grace,  a  defirable  degree  of  tendernefs,  religious  affec- 
 tion, and  devotion  in  our  aflemblies. 
 
 And  as  God  has  continued  and  renewed  the  fhowers  of  his 
 grace  among  this  people  for  feme  time  ;  fo  he  has  with  un- 
 common quicknefs  fet  up  'his  vifible  kingdom,  and  gathered 
 himfelf  a  church  in  the  midfl:  of  them.  I  have  neu  baptized, 
 fmce  the  conclufion  of  niy  lafl;  Journal^  thirty  perfons,  ff- 
 teen  adults  and  ffteen  children.  Which  added  to  the  num- 
 ber there  mentioned,  nizkts  /event y-fev en  perfons;  whereof 
 thirty-eight  are  adults,  and  thirty-nine  childjen  ;  and  all  with- 
 in the  fpace  of  eleven  months  pafl.— And  it  muft  be  noted, 
 thet  I  have  baptized  no  adu'ts,  but  luch  as  appeared  to  have  a 
 work  of  fpecial  grace  wrought  in  their  hearts  ;  1  mean  iuch 
 
 who 
 
AMONG     THE    INDIANS.  431 
 
 wlio  have  had  the  experience  not  only  of  the  awakening  and 
 huiiibling,  but  (in  a  judgment  of  charity)  of  the  renewing  and 
 eoaiForting  influences  of  the  divine  Spirit.  Although  there 
 are  many  others  under  folemn  concern  for  their  fouls,  who  (I 
 app'  ehend)  are  perfons  of  fufficient  knowledge,  and  vifible  fe- 
 rr.'ulnefs,  at  p?'e/ent,  to  render  them  proper  fubj eels  of  the 
 ordinance  of  baptifm.  Yet  fince  they  give  no  comfortable  e- 
 vidences  of  having  as  yet  paffed  a  faving  change,  but  only  ap- 
 pear under  convictions  of  their  fm  and  mifery,  and  having  no 
 principle  of  fpiritual  life  wrought  in  them,  are  liable  to  lofe 
 the  imprcffions  of  religion  they  are  now  under:  and  confider- 
 ing  the  great  propenfity  there  is  in  this  people  naturally  to  a- 
 bufe  themfeives  with  ftrong  drink,  and  fearing  left  fome,  who 
 at  prefent  appear  ferious  and  concerned  for  their  fouls,  might 
 lofe  their  concern,  and  return  to  this  fm,  and  fo  (if  baptized) 
 prove  a  fcandal  to  their  profeflion,  I  have  thought  proper  hi- 
 therto to  omit  the  baptifm  of  any  but  fuch  who  give  fome 
 hopeful  evidences  of  a  faving  change,  although  I  do  not  pre- 
 tend to  determine  pofitively  refpe£ling  the  ftates  of  any. 
 
 I  likewife  adminiftered  the  Lord's  fupper  to  a  number  of 
 perfons,  who  I  have  abundant  reafon  to  think  (as  I  elfewhere 
 obferved)  were  proper  fubje6ts  of  that  ordinance,  within  the 
 fpace  of  ten  months  and  ten  days,  after  my  firft  coming  a- 
 mong  thefe  Indians  in  New-Jerfey.  And  from  the  time  that 
 I  am  informed,  fome  of  them  were  attending  an  idolatrous 
 feajl  and  facrifice  in  honour  to  devils,  to  the  time  they  fat 
 down  at  the  Lord's  table  (I  truft)  to  the  honour  of  God,  was 
 not  more  than  a  full  year.  Surely  Chrift's  little  flock  here, 
 fo  fuddenly  gathered  from  among  Pagans,  may  juftly  fay, 
 in  the  language  of  the  church  of  old,  "  The  Lord  hath  done 
 ''  great  things  for  us,  whereof  we  are  glad." 
 
 Much  of  the  goodncfs  of  God  has  alfo  appeared  In  relation 
 to  their  acquirement  of  knowledge,  both  in  religion  and  in 
 the  affairs  of  common  life.  There  has  been  a  wonderful 
 thirft  after  Chriflian  knoivledge  prevailing  among  thern  in  ge- 
 neral, and  an  eager  defirc  of  beiiig  inftructed  in  Chriftian 
 doftrines  and  manners.  This  has  prompted  them  to  allc  many 
 pertinent  as  well  as  important  queftions ;  the  anfwers  to 
 which  have  tended  much  to  enlighten  their  minds,  and  pro- 
 mote their  knowledge  in  divine  things.  Many  of  the  doc- 
 trines I  have  delivered,  they  have  queried  with  me  about,  in 
 order  to  gain  further  light  and  infight  into  them  ;  particular- 
 ly the  doftrine  of  fredef}ination :  and  have  from  time  to 
 time  manifeftcd  a  good  underftanding  of  them,  by  their  an- 
 fwers 
 
432  REMARKS  ON  THE  WORK  OF  ORACE 
 
 fwers  to  the  queftions  propofed  to  them  in    my   catechetical 
 leffures. 
 
 They  have  likewife  queried  with  me,  refpecfling  a  proper 
 method  as  well  as  proper  viatter  of  prayer,  and  expreirions 
 fuitablc  to  be  made  ufe  of  in  that  religious  exercife  ;  and  have 
 taken  pains  In  order  to  the  performance  of  this  duty  with  un- 
 derftanding. 
 
 They  have  likewife  taken  pains,  and  appeared  remarkably 
 apt  in  learning  to  fing  Pfalin-tunes,  and  are  now  able  to  fmn^ 
 with  a  good  degree  of  decency  in  the  worlhip  of  God. 
 
 They  have  alfo  acquired  a  confiderable  degree  of  ufeful 
 knowledge  in  the  affairs  of  common  life:  fo  that  they  now 
 appear  like  rational  creatures,  fit  for  human  fociety,  free  of 
 that  favage  roughnefs  and  brutidi  ftupidity,  which  rendered 
 them  very  difagreeable  in  their  Pagan  Hate. 
 
 They  feem  ambitious  of  a  thorough  acquaintance  with  the 
 Knglidi  language,  and  for  that  end  frequently  Ipeak  it  among 
 themfelves ;  and  many  of  them  have  made  good  proficiency 
 in  their  acquirement  of  it,  fince  my  coming  among  them ; 
 fo  that  mofi:  of  them  can  underlhnd  a  confiderable  part,  and 
 fome  the  fubfiance  of  my  difcourfes,  without  an  interpreter^ 
 (being  ufed  to  my  low  and  vulgar  methods  of  exprefiion), 
 though  they  could  not  well  underliand  other  minilters. 
 
 And  as  they  are  defirous  of  inltruftion,  and  furprifingly  apt 
 in  the  reception  of  it,  fo  divine  providence  has  fmiled  upon 
 rhem  in  regard  o^  proper  means  in  order  to  it. The  at- 
 tempts made  for  the  procurement  of  a  fchool  among  rhem 
 have  been  fucceeded,  and  a  kind  providence  has  fent  them 
 ■nfcboolrnajler,  ofwhomlmay  juftly  fay,  I  know  of  ''no 
 *'  man  like  minded,  who  will  naturally  care  for  their  fiate." 
 
 He  has  generally  thirty  or  thirty-five  children  in  his  fchool: 
 and  when  he  kept  an  evening  fchool  (as  he  did  while  the 
 length  of  the  evenings  would  admit  of  it)  he  had //^d-fw  or 
 ■twenty  people,  married  and  fingle. 
 
 The  children  learn  with  furprifing  rcadinefs ;  fo  that  their 
 majler  tells  me,  he  never  had  an  Engli/h  fchool  that  learned, 
 in  general,  comparably  fo  faft.  There  were  not  above  tvjo  in 
 thirty,  although  fome  of  them  were  very  fmall,  but  what 
 learned  to  know  all  the  letters  in  the  alphabet  diftinctly,  with- 
 in three  days  after  his  entrance  upon  his  bufmeis ;  and  divers 
 in  that  fpace  of  time  learned  to  fpell  confiderably  :  and  fome 
 of  them,  fince  the  beoinning  of  February  laft  (at  which  time 
 the  fchool  was  fet  up)  have  learned  fo  much,  that  they  are  a- 
 ble  to  read  in  a  Pf alter  or  Tejl anient  without  fpelling. 
 
 They  are  inflrufted  twice  a  v/cek  in  the  Reverend   Afi^em- 
 
 blv's 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  ,         433 
 
 bly's  Shorter  Catechifm,  viz.  on  Wediiefday  and  Saturday. 
 And  fome  of  them,  lince  the  latter  end  of  f  ebruary,  (at  which 
 time  they  began),  have  learned  to  fay  it  pretty  diftin£^iy  by 
 heart  confiderably  more  than  half  through ;  and  moft  of  them 
 have  made  fome  proficiency  in  it. 
 
 They  are  likewife  inftrufted  in  the  duty  of  fecret  prayer, 
 and  moft  of  them  conftantly  attend  it  night  and  morning,  and 
 are  very  careful  to  inform  their  mafter  if  they  apprehend  any 
 of  their  little  fchool-mates  negleft  that  religious  exercifc. 
 
 Fourthly,  It  is  worthy  to  be  noted,  (to  the  praife  of  ^o^t- 
 reiga  grace),  that  araidft  fo  great  a  work  of  conviiflion, — fo 
 much  concern  and  religious  affection,  there  has  been  no  pre- 
 valency,  nor  indeed  any  confiderable  appearance  of  falfe  re- 
 ligion,  (if  I  may  fo  term  it),  or  heats  of  imagination,  intempe- 
 rate zeal,  and  fpiritual  pride;  which  corrupt  mixtures  too 
 often  attend  the  revival  and  powerful  propagation  of  religion  ; 
 and  that  there  have  been  fo  very  few  inftances  of  irregular  and 
 fcandalous  behaviour  among  thofe  who  have  appeared  ferious. 
 — I  may  juftly  repeat  what  I  obfcrved  in  a  remark  at  the  con- 
 clullon  of  my  laft  Journal,  viz.  That  there  has  here  been  no 
 appearance  of  "  bodily  agonies,  convulfions,  frightful  fcream- 
 *'  ings,  fwoonings,"  and  the  like:  and  may  now  further  add, 
 that  there  has  been  no  prevalency  of  viiions,  trances,  and  ima- 
 ginations of  any  kind;  although  there  has  been  fome  appear- 
 ance of  fomething  of  that  nature  fince  the  conclufion  of  that 
 Journal.  An  inftance  of  which  I  have  given  an  account  of 
 in  my  Journal  of  December  26. 
 
 But  this  work  of  grace  has,  in  the  mahiy  been  carried  on 
 xvith  a  furprifing  degree  of  purity,  and  freedom  from  traf)  and 
 corrupt  mixture.  The  religious  concern  that  perfons  have 
 been  under,  has  generally  been  rational  cLudjufl;  arifmg  from 
 9.fenfe  of  their  fms,  and  expofedncfs  to  the  divine  difpleafure 
 on  the  account  of  them ;  as  well  as  their  utter  inability  to 
 deliver  themfeives  from  the  mifery  they  felt  and  feared. 
 And  if  there  has  been  in  any  inftances  an  appearance  of  irra- 
 tional  concern  and  perturbation  of  mind,  when  the  fubjefts 
 of  it  knew  not  why,  yet  chere  has  been  no  prevalency  of  any 
 fuch  thing  ;  and  indeed  I  fcarce  know  of  any  inftance  of  that 
 nature  at  all. — And  it  is  very  remarkable,  th?.t  although  the 
 concern  of-many  perfons  under  convictions  of  their  perifaing 
 Hate  has  been  very  great  and  prefTmg,  yet  I  have  never  feen 
 any  thing  like  defpcration  attending  it  in  any  one  inftance. 
 They  have  had  the  moft  lively  fenfe  of  their  ur.donencjs  ia 
 themfeives;  have  been  brought  to  give  up  all  hopes  of  dc- 
 liverance  from  themfeives ;  and  their  fpiritual  exerciles  lead- 
 
 3    I  ing 
 
434  REMARKS  ON  THE  WORK  OF  GRACE 
 
 ing  hereto,  have  been  attended  with  great  diflrefs  and  anguifh 
 of  foul :  and  yet  in  the  feafons  of  the  greatcft  extremity, 
 there  has  been  no  appearance  of  defpa'ir  in  any  of  them, — 
 nothing  that  has  diicouraged,  or  in  any  wife  lundfred  them 
 from  the  moft  dihgent  ufe  of  all  proper  nr^eans  for  their  con- 
 verfion  and  falvation ;  whence  it  is  apparent,  there  is  not 
 thatdanger  of  perlons  being  driven  into  delpair  wnAtifpiritual 
 trouble,  (unlcfs  in  cafes  of  deep  and  habitual  mclanchoK),  that 
 the  world  in  general  is  ready  to  imagine. 
 
 The  comfort  that  perfons  have  obtained  after  their  difircffes, 
 has  likcwife  in  general  appeared  folid,  well  grr/unded,  and 
 fcriptural ;  arifing  from  a  Ipiritual  zn\i  fuptrnatw  al  illumhia- 
 tion  of  mind, — a  view  of  di\inc  things  (in  a  meafure)  as 
 thfry  are, — a  complacency  of  foul  in  the  di\  ine  perleftions, 
 — and  a  peculiar  fatisfaftion  in  the  ivcty  of  falvation  by  free 
 fovereign  grace  in  the  great  Redeemer. 
 
 Their  joys  have  feemed  to  rile  from  a  variety  of  views  and 
 confiderations  of  divine  things,  akhough  fur  fubftance  the 
 fame.  Some,  who  under  conv!&:on  i'eenied  to  have  the 
 hardeft  druggies  and  heart-rifmgs  againft  divine  fovereignty, 
 have  feemed,  at  the  firfl:  dawn  of  theii  comfort,  to  rejoice  in 
 z  peculiar  manner  in  that  divine  perfection, — have  been  de- 
 lighted to  think  that  theraielves,  and  all  things  elle,  were  in 
 the  hand  of  God,  and  that  he  would  dilpoff  of  them  "  juft  as 
 «  he  pleafed." 
 
 Others,  w^ho  juft  before  their  reception  of  comfort,  have 
 been  remarkably  opprefTed  with  a  fenfe  of  their  undonenefs  and 
 poverty,  who  have  feen  themfelves,  as  it  were,  fallmg  down 
 into  remedilefs  perdition,  have  been  at  firft  more  peculiarly 
 delighted  with  a  view  of  the  freenefs  and  riches  of  divine 
 grace,  and  the  offer  of  falvation  made  to  periihing  fmners 
 "  without  money,  and  without  price." 
 
 Some  have  at  firft  appeared  to  rejoice  efpecially  in  the 
 ivjfdom  of  God,  difcovered  in  the  way  of  falvation  by  Chrift ; 
 it  then  appearing  to  them  "  a  new  and  living  way,"  a  v  ay 
 they  had  never  thought,  nor  had  any  juft  cmception  of,  un- 
 til opened  to  them  by  the /pedal  influence  of  the  divine  Spi- 
 rit. And  fome  of  them,  upon  a  lively  fpifitual  view  of  this 
 way  of  falvation,  have  wondered  at  then  paft  folly  in  feeking 
 falvation  other  ways,  and  have  admired  that  they  never  faw 
 ihh  way  of  falvation  before,  which  now  appeared  io  plain  and 
 eafy,  as  well  as  rjrc£-/.Vn/  to  them. 
 
 Others  again  have  had  a  more  general  view   of  the  beauty 
 and  excellency  of  Chrift,  and  have  had   their  fouls  delighted 
 v;ith  an  apprchenfion  of  his  divine  glory,  as  unfpeakably  ex- 
 ceeding 
 
AMONG     THE     INDIANS.  435. 
 
 eceding  all  they  had  ever  conceived  of  before ;  yet  without 
 fingling  out  (as  it  were)  any  one  of  the  divine  perfe<flions  in 
 particular ;  fo  that  although  their  comforts  have  feemed  to 
 aj  ifc  from  a  variety  of  views  and  confiderations  of  divine  glo- 
 ries, ftill  they  wcrt  fpirJtual  and  fnpernatural  views  of  thera, 
 and  not  groundlefs  fancies,  that  weie  the  fpring  of  their  joys 
 and  comforts. 
 
 Yet  it  muft  be  acknowledged,  that  when  this  work  became 
 fo  un'.verfal  aaJ  prevalent,  and  gained  luch  general  credit  and 
 efteem  among  the  Indians,  that  Satan  feemed  to  have  little 
 advantage  of  working  againit  it  in  his  own  proper  garb ;  he 
 then  transformed  hiaifelf  "into  an  angel  of  light,"  and  made 
 fome  vigorous  attempts  to  introduce  turbulent  commotions  of 
 the  palfi  )ns  in  the  room  if  genuine  convictions  of  fm,  imagi- 
 nary and  fanciful  noti  ms  of  Chrift,  as  appearing  to  the  men- 
 tal eye  in  a  human  fhape,  and  being  in  fjme  particular  po- 
 ftures,  <i;c.  in  the  room  of  fpiritual  and  fupernatural  difco- 
 veries  of  his  divine  glory  and  excellency,  as  well  as  divers 
 other  delufions.  And  I  have  reafon  to  think,  that  if  thefe 
 thmgs  had  met  with  countenance  and  encouragement,  there 
 Would  have  been  a  very  confiderable />^;'t;^  of  this  kind  of 
 eonveits  here.  Spiritual  pride  alfo  difcovered  itfelf  in  various 
 inftances.  Some  perfjns  who  had  been  under  great  arfeclions, 
 feemed  very  deilrous  from  thence  of  being  thought  truly  gra- 
 cious ;  who,  when  I  could  not  but  exprefs  to  them  my  fears 
 refpe^ing  their  fpiritual  ftates,  difcovered  their  refentments 
 to  a  cjnliJerable  degree  upon  that  occafion.  There  alfo  ap- 
 peared in  one  or  tivo  of  them  an  unbecoming  ambition  of 
 beinr  teachers  of  others.  So  that  Satan  has  been  a  bufy  ad- 
 verfary  here,  as  well  as  elfewhere.  But  (blcfled  be  God) 
 though  fomething  of  this  nature  has  appeared,  yet  nothing  of 
 it  has  prevailed,  nor  indeed  made  any  confiderable  progrefs  at 
 all.  My  people  are  now  apprifed  of  thefe  thing?,  are  ac- 
 quainted that  Satan  in  fuch  a  manner  "  transformed  himfelf 
 *'  into  an  angel  of  light,"  in  the  fiill  feafon  of  the  great  out- 
 pouring of  the  divine  Spirit  in  the  days  of  the  apoftles  ;  and 
 that  fomething  of  this  nature,  in  a  greater  or  lefTer  degree, 
 has  attended  alnioft  every  revival  and  remarkable  propagation 
 of  true  religion  ever  fince.  And  they  have  learned  fo  to  di- 
 flinguifti  between  the  gold  and  drofs,  that  the  credit  of  the 
 latter  "  is  trode  down  like  the  mire  of  the  ftreets :"  and  it 
 being  natural  for  this  kiad  o^  fluff  to  die  with  its  credit,  there 
 is  now  fcarce  any  appearance  of  it  among  them. 
 
 And  as  there   has  been  no  prevalency   of  irregular  heats. 
 Imaginary  notions,    fpiritual  pride,    and   Satanical  delufions 
 
 3   I  2  among 
 
tt 
 
 436  REMARKS  ON  THE  WORK  Or  GRACE 
 
 among  my  people ;  fo  there  has  been  a  very  few  inftances  of 
 
 fcandalous  and  irregular  behaviour  among  thofe  who  have 
 made  a  prfjfejpon,  or  even  an  appearance  of  ferioufnefs.  I 
 do  not  know  of  more  thnn  th:ee  or  four  fuek  perfons  that 
 have  been  guilty  of  any  open  mifconduft,  lince  their  firft  ac- 
 quaintance vs/ith  Chriftianity,  and  not  one  that  perfifti,  in  any- 
 thing of  that  nature.  And  perhaps  the  rennarkable  purity  of 
 this  work  in  the  latter  refpeft,  its  freedom  from  frequent 
 inftances  of  fcandal,  is  very  much  owing  to  its  purity  in  the 
 former  refpeO,  its  freedom  from  corrupt  mixtures  of  (piri- 
 tual  pride,  wild-fire,  and  delufion,  which  naturally  lay  a  foun- 
 dation for  fcandalous  practices. 
 
 *'  May  this  blefied  work  in  the  power  and  purity  of  it  pre- 
 vail among  the  poor  Indians  here^  as  well  as  fpread  elfc- 
 *  where,  till  their  rcmoteft  tribes  ihali  fee  the  falvation  of 
 '  God!     Amen." 
 
 Money  collefted  and  expended  for  the  Indians. 
 
 As  mention  has  been  made  in  the  preceding  Journal,  of 
 an  Englifh/c/'oc/  crefted  and  continued  among  thefe  Indians, 
 dependent  entirely  upon  charity ;  and  as  colk^ions  have  al- 
 ready been  made  in  divers  places  for  the  fupport  of  it,  as  well 
 as  for  defraying  other  charges  that  have  neceflarily  arifcn  in 
 the  promotion  of  the  religious  interefts  of  the  Indians,  it  may 
 be  fati.sfaftory,  and  perhaps  will  be  thought  by  fome  but  a 
 piece  of  juftice  to  the  world,  that  an  exaft  account  be  here 
 given  of  the  money  already  received  by  way  of  colleftion  for 
 the  benefit  of  the  Indians,  and  the  manner  in  which  it  has  been 
 expended. 
 
 The  following  is  therefore  a  juft  account  of  this  matter. 
 
 Money 
 
AMONG     THE    i  N  D  I  A  N  S*  437 
 
 Money  received  fince  October  laft,  by  way  of  public  collec- 
 tion, for  promoting  the  religious  interefts  of  the  Indians  in 
 New-Jerley,  viz. 
 
 Ffom  New- York,  -  .  » 
 
 Jamaica  on  Long-Ifland, 
 
 Eli  labeth- Town,  .  -  , 
 
 Eli  fabeth- Town  farms, 
 
 Newark,  •  -  -  - 
 
 Woodbridge,  -  •  -  . 
 
 Morris- Town,  .  -  ^ 
 
 Freehold,  -  -  * 
 
 Freehold  Dutch  congregation, 
 
 Shrewlbury  and  Sbark-river, 
 
 Middle-Town  Dutch  congregation, 
 
 The  Dutch  congregation  in  and  about  New- 
 
 Brunfwick,  -  .  , 
 
 Kings- Town,  _  .  _ 
 
 Nefhaminy,  and  places  adjacent  in  Pennfylvania, 
 Abington  and  New-Providence,  by  the  hand  of  the 
 
 Reverend  Mr  Treat, 
 
 The  whole  amountiag  to  X.  100    o 
 
 Money  paid  out  fince  Oftober  laft  for  promoting  the  religious 
 interefts  of  the  Indians  in  New- Jerfey,  viz, 
 
 I.  s,  d. 
 
 Upon  the  occafion  mentioned  in  my  Journal  of  Ja- 
 nuary 28.                 -             ^^  -                 -              82  5  o 
 
 For  the  building  a  fchoolhoufe^,                   -                 3  5  o 
 
 To  the  fchoolmafter  as  a  part  ornis  reward  fbr  his 
 
 prefent  year's  fervice,                   -             -               17  10  o 
 
 For  books  for  the  children  to  learn  in,  •  300 
 
 The  whole  amounting  to  L.  106    o    o 
 
 DAVID  BRAINERD. 
 
 /. 
 
 s. 
 
 d. 
 
 23 
 
 10 
 
 2 
 
 3 
 
 0 
 
 0 
 
 7 
 
 5 
 
 0 
 
 I 
 
 lij 
 
 9 
 
 4 
 
 5 
 
 7 
 
 1 
 
 18 
 
 2 
 
 I 
 
 5 
 
 3 
 
 12 
 
 II 
 
 0 
 
 4 
 
 14 
 
 3 
 
 -      3 
 
 5 
 
 0 
 
 2 
 
 0 
 
 0 
 
 3 
 
 5 
 
 0 
 
 5 
 
 11 
 
 0 
 
 14 
 he 
 
 5 
 
 10 
 
 10 
 
 5 
 
 0 
 
A   P  P   E   N   D  I  X  tothe  Journal. 
 
 I  Should  have  concluded  what  I  had,  at  prefent,  to  ofFer 
 upon  the  affairs  rclpedling  my  mijpon,  with  the  prece- 
 ding account  of  the  money  coUefted  and  expended  tor  the  re- 
 ligious  Inieujis  of  the  Indians,  but  that  J  liavc  n(^t  long  Gncc 
 received  from  the  Reverend  Prefident  of  the  correlpoudents, 
 the  copy  of  a  letter  direded  to  him  from  the  Honourable  So- 
 ciety for  propagating  Chriftian  knowledge,  dated  at  Edinburgh, 
 March  21.  1745.  Wherein  J  find  it  is  exprelsly  enjoined  up- 
 on their  miiTionaries,  "  That  they  give  an  exaft  account  of 
 **  the  methods  they  make  ufe  of  for  inllru6ling  themfelves  in 
 "  the  Indians  language,  and  what  piogrtfs  they  have  already 
 *^  made  in  it.  What  methods  they  are  now  taking  to  inftrudl 
 "  the  Indians  in  the  principles  of  our  holy  religion.  And 
 *'  particularly,  that  they  let  forth  in  their  Journals  what  dif- 
 **  ficulties  they  have  already  met  with,  and  the  methods  they 
 **  make  ufe  of  for  furmounting  the  fan;e." 
 
 As  to  the  two  former  of  theie  particulars,  I  trufl  that  what 
 I  have  already  noted  in  my  Journals  from  time  to  time,  might 
 have  been  in  a  good  meafure  fatisfaflory  to  the  Honourable 
 Society,  had  thefe  journals  arrived  fafely  and  feajonuhiyy 
 which  I  am  fenfible  they  have  not  in  general  done,  by  rcaiun 
 of  their  falling  into  the  hands  of  the  enemy,  although  I  have 
 been  at  the  pains  offending  two  copies  of  every  Journal,  for 
 more  than  two  years  paft,  left  one  might  mifcarry  in  the  pafr 
 fage.  But  with  relation  to  .he  latter  of  "thefe  particulars, 
 I  have  purpolcly  omitted  faywig  any  thing  confiderable,  and 
 that  for  thefe  two  reafons.  F^~Jly  Becauie  I  could  not  often- 
 times give  any  tolerable  account  of  the  d^-fficulties  I  met  with 
 in  my  work,  without  fpcaking  fomewhat  particularly  of  the 
 ccufes  of  them,  and  the  circumjlunces  conducing  to  them, 
 which  would  necefTarily  have  rendered  my  Journals  very 
 lengthy  and  tedious.  Befides,  fome  of  the  caufes  of  my  dif- 
 ficulties I  thought  more  fit  to  be  concealed  than  divulged. — 
 And,  fecmdly^  Becaufe  1  thought  a  frequent  mentioning  of 
 the  difficulties  attending  my  work,  might  appear  as  an  ifnhe- 
 comlng  complaint  unier  my  burdens ;  or  as  if  I  would  rather  be 
 thought  to  be  endowed  with  a  lingular  meafure  of  felf-denial, 
 
 conftancy, 
 
O  F     L  E  A  R  N  I  N  G,     6r.  43(7 
 
 Conftancy,  and  holy  refolution,  to  meet  and  confront  fo  many 
 dirfieulties,  and  yet  to  hold  on  and  go  forward  amidfl:  them 
 all.  But  ilnce  the  Honourable  Society  are  pleafed  to  require 
 a  more  exa£i  and  particular  account  of  thele  things,  I  fhall 
 cheerfully  eadeavour  fomething  for  their  fatisfaftion  in  rela- 
 tion to   each  of  thefe  particulars:  although  in  regard  of  the 
 
 latter,   I   am  ready  to  fay,  Infandum jubes  renovare  dolo- 
 
 rem. 
 
 The  mofl  fuccefsful  method  I  have  taken  for  inftrufting  my- 
 felf  in   any  of  the  Indian  languages,  is,  to  tranflate   Englifli 
 difcourfes   by    the    help  of  an  interpreter  or  two,  into  their 
 language,  as  near  verbatnii  as  the  feiife  will  admit  of,  and  to 
 obierve  ftriftly  how  they    ufe  words,  and  what   conftruftion 
 they  will  bear  in  various  cafes ;  and  thus  to  gain  fome  acquaint- 
 ance with   the    root   from  whence  particular  words  proceed, 
 and  to  (ce  how   they  are  thence  varied  and  diverfified.     But 
 here  occurs  a  very  great  difficulty;  for  the  interpreters  being 
 unlearned,  and  unacquainted  with  the  rules  of  language,  it  is 
 impoITible  fometimes  to  know  by  them  what  part  of  fpeech 
 iome  particular  words  is  of,  whether  noun,  veib,  or  participle  ; 
 for  thfy  feem  to  n{c  participles  fometimes  where  we   (hould 
 ufe  nouns,  and    fometimes   where   we  fli ould  ufe  vei  bs  in  the 
 Engliih  language.     But   I   have,  notwithftanding  many  diffi- 
 culties, gained  fome  acquaintance  with  the  grounds  of  the 
 Delaware  language,  and  have  learned  mi>ft  of  the  defeSls  in 
 it;  fo  that  I  know  what  Englifli  words  can,  and  what  cannot 
 be  tranflated  into  it.     I   have   alfo  gained  fome  acquaintance 
 with  the  particular  phrafeologies,  as  well  as  peculiarities  of 
 their  language,  one  of  which  I  cannot  but  mention.     Their 
 language  does   not  admit  of  their  fpeaking  any  word  deno- 
 ting relation,  fuch  as,  father,  fon,  <6c.  abjolutely  ;  that  is,  with- 
 out prefixing   a    pronoun-paffive   to  it,  fuch  as  my,   thy,  his, 
 &c.      Hence   they  cannot  be  baptized  in  their  own  language 
 in  the  name  of  the  Father,  and  the  Son,  (be. ;  but  they  may 
 be  baptized  in  the  name  of  Jefus  Chrifl:  and  his  Father,   6c, 
 I  have  gained  {o  much  knowledge  of  their  language,  that  1 
 can   underftand   a  confiderable  part  of  what  they  fay,  when 
 they  difcourfe  upon  divine  things,  and  am  frequently  able  to 
 correct  my  interpreter,  if  he  miftakes  my  fenfe.     But  I  caa 
 do  nothing  to  any  purpofe  at  fpeaking  the  language  myfelf. 
 
 And  as  an  apology  for  this  defefl,  1  muft  renew,  or  rather 
 enlarge  my  former  complaint,  viz.  That  '*  while  fo  much  of 
 '*  my  time  is  necelfarily  confumed  in  journeying,"  while  I  am 
 obliged  to  ride  four  thoufand  miles  a  year,  (as  1  have  done  in 
 ^he  year  pafr),  "  I  can  have  little  left  for  any  of  my  neceffary 
 
 "  fludies. 
 
44«  O  F     L  E  A  R  N  I  N  G 
 
 *'  ftudies,  and  confequcntly  for  the  fludy  of  the  Indian  lan^ 
 "'  guages."     And  this  I  may  venture  to  fay,  is  the  great,  if 
 not  the  only  reafon  why  the  Delaware  language  is  not  familiar 
 to  me  before  this  time.     And  it  is  impoffible  I  fhould  ever  be 
 able  to  fpeak  it  without  clofc  application,  which  (at  prefent) 
 I  fee  no  profpecl  of  having   time   for.     To  preach  and  cate- 
 chife  frequently,  to  converfe  privately  with  perfons  that  need 
 fo  much  inftru6lion  and  direftion  as  thefe  poor  Indians  do ; 
 to  take  care  of  all  their  fecular  affairs,  as  if  they  were  a  com- 
 pany of  children ;  to  ride  abroad  frequently  in  order  to  pro- 
 cure colle£lions  for  the  fupport  of  the  fchoolf  and   for  their 
 help  and  benefit  in  other  refpeds;  to  hear  and  decide  all  the 
 petty  differences  that  arife  among  any  of  them ;  and  to  have 
 the  conftant  overfight  and  management  of  all  their  affairs  of 
 «very  kind,  muft  needs  ingrofs  n:oft  of  my  time,  and  leave  mc 
 little    for  application  to  the  ftudy   of  the  Indian  languages. 
 And  when  I   add  to  this,  the  time  that  is  neceflarily   confu- 
 med  upon  my  Journals,  I  mufl  fay  I  have  little  to  Ipare    ior 
 other  bufinefs.     I   have  not  (as  was  obferved  before)  lent  to 
 the  Honourable  Society  lefs  than  two  copies  of  every  Journal, 
 for  more  than  tv/o  years  paft;  molt  of  which,  I  fuppofc,  have 
 been  taken  by  the  French  in  their  pafTage.     And  a  third  copy 
 I  have  conftantly  kept  by  me,  left  the  others  fhould  mifcarry ; 
 which  has  caufed  me  not  a  little  labour,  and  fo  ftraitened  me 
 for  time,  when  I  have  been  at  libeity  from  other  bulinefs,  and 
 had  opportunity  to  fit  down  to  writing,  (which  is  but  rare),  I 
 have  been  obliged  to  write  twelve  and  thirteen  hours  in  a  day, 
 till  my  fpirits  have  been  extremely  wafted,  and  my  life  almoft 
 ipent,  to  get  thefe  writings  accomplifhed.     And  after  all ;  af- 
 ter diligent  application  to  the  various  parts  of  my  work,  and 
 after  the  moft  induftrious  improvement  of  time  1  am  capable 
 of,  both  early  and  late,  I  cannot  oftentimes  poffibly  gain  two 
 hours  in  a  week  for  readings  or  any  other  ftudies,  unlefs  jufl: 
 for  what  urges  and  appears  of  abfolute  neceflity  for  the  pre- 
 fent.    And  frequently  when    I   attempt  to   redeem  time,  by 
 iparing   it  cut   of  my  fleeping  hours,  I  am  by  that  means 
 thrown   under  bodily  indifpofltion,  and   rendered  fit  for  no- 
 thing. 
 
 This  is  truly  my  prefent  ftate,  and  is  like  to  be  fo,  for 
 :?ught  I  can  fee,  unlels  I  could  procure  an  afpfiant  in  my 
 -vork,  or  quit  my  prefent  bufinefs. 
 
 But  although  I  have  not  made  that  proficiency  I  could  wifh 
 to  have  done,  in  learning  the  Indian  languages  ;  yet  I  have  ti- 
 led all  endeavours  to  inftruft  them  in  the  Englifli  tongue, 
 which  r-erh-ips  "^^'iKi  be  rAors  advantageous  to  the  Chriftian  in- 
 
 tereft 
 
THE     INDIAN     LANGUAGE. 
 
 441 
 
 tereft  among  them,  than  if  I  fhould  preach  in  their  own  lan- 
 guage ;  for  that  is  very  defecftive,  (as  1  (hall  hereafter  ob- 
 fcrve),  fo  that  many  things  cannot  be  communicated  to  them 
 without  introducing  Englifh  terms.  Bcfides,  they  can  have 
 no  books  tranflated  into  their  language,  without  great  difficul- 
 ty and  expcnce  ;  and  if  ftill  accuftomed  to  their  own  language 
 only,  they  would  have  no  advantage  of  hearing  other  mini- 
 fters  occafionally,  or  ia  my  abfencs.  So  that  my  having  a 
 perfeft  acquaiatance  with  the  Indian  language,  would  be  of 
 no  great  importance  with  regard  to  this  congregation  of  In- 
 dians in  New-Jerfey,  although  it  might  be  of  great  fervice  to 
 me  in  treating  with  the  Indians  clfewhcre. 
 
 The  methods  I  am  taking  to  inftruft  the  Indians  in  the 
 principles  of  our  holy  religion,  are,  to  preach,  or  open 
 and  improve  fome  particular  points  of  doftrine  ;  to  expound 
 particular  paragraphs,  or  fometimes  whole  chapters  of  God's 
 ■word  to  them ;  to  give  hiftorical  relations  from  fcripture  of 
 the  moft  material  and  remarkable  occurrences  relating  to  the 
 church  of  God  from  the  beginning ;  and  frequently  to  cate- 
 chife  them  upon  the  principles  of  Chriflianity.  The  latter  of 
 thefe  methods  of  inftrufting,  I  manage  in  a  twofold  manner. 
 I  fometimes  catechife  fyjlcmat'ic-aily,  propofing  queflions  a- 
 greeablc  to  the  Reverend  Aflembly's  Shorter  Catechifm.  This 
 I  have  carried  on  to  a  confiderable  length.  At  other  times  I 
 catechife  upon  any  important  fubjedt  that  I  think  difficult  to 
 them.  Sometimes  when  1  have  difcourfed  upon  ibme  parti- 
 cular point,  and  made  it  as  plain  and  familiar  to  them  as  X 
 can,  I  then  catechife  them  upon  the  moft  material  branches 
 of  my  difcourfe,  to  fee  whether  they  had  a  thorough  under- 
 ftanding  of  it.  But  I  as  have  catechifed  chiefly  in  d^fyjlema- 
 iical  form,  I  fhall  here  give  fome  fpecimen  of  the  method  I 
 make  ufe  of  in  it,  as  well  as  of  the  propriety  and  juftnefs  of 
 my  people's  anfwers  to  the  queftions  propofcd  to  them. 
 
 ^iejfkns  upon  the   benefits  bclltvers  receive  from  Chrift  at 
 death. 
 
 £:  I  have  ftiewn  you,  that  the  children  of  God  receive  a 
 
 great  many  good  things  from  Chrift  while  they  live,  now  have 
 they  any  more  to  receive  when  they  come  to  die  ?       A.  Tes. 
 
 Q^  Arc  the  children  of  God  then  made  perfeftly  free  from 
 fm?  A.  Yes. 
 
 Qj  Do  you  think  they  will  never  more  be  troubled  with 
 
 -i  K  vain> 
 
442    M  E  T-H  ODS    OF    INSTRUCTING 
 
 vain,  foolil"h,  and  wiek^d  thoughts  ?  A.  No,  never  at  alL 
 
 Q^  Will  not  they  then  be  like  the  good  angels  1  have  ib  of- 
 ten told  you  of?  A.  Tes. 
 
 Q_.  And  do  you  call  this  a  great  mercy  to  be  freed  from  all 
 fin?  A.  Yes. 
 
 Q.  Do  all  God's  children  count  it  fo? 
 
 A.  Tes,   all  of  them. 
 
 ^  Do  you  think  this  is  what  they  would  afk  for  above  all 
 things,  if  God  fhould  fay  to  them,  Aflc  what  you  will,  and  it 
 ihall  be  done  for  you  ? 
 
 A.  0  yes,  be  befure,  this  is  ivhat  they  wnnt. 
 
 (K  You  fay  the  fouls  of  God's  people  at  death  are  made 
 perfeftly  free  from  fin,  where  do  they  go  tben? 
 
 A.  7  hey  go  and  live  with  Jefus  Chrijl. 
 
 Q^  Does  Chrift  fhew  them  more  refpefl  and  honour,  and 
 make  them  more  happy  *  than  we  can  pofiibiy  think  of  in 
 this  world  ?  A.  Yes. 
 
 Q.  Do  they  go  imtnediately  to  live  with  Chrift  in  heaven, 
 as  foon  as  their  bodies  are  dead?  or  do  they  tarry  fomev/herc 
 elfc  a  while  ?  A.  They  go  immediately  to  Chrijl. 
 
 Q^  Does  Chrift  take  any  care  of  the  bodies  of  his  people 
 when  they  are  dead,  and  their  fouls  gone  to  heaven,  or  docs 
 he  forget  them  ? 
 
 A.  He  takes  care  of  them. 
 
 Thefe  queftions  were  all  anfwered  with  furprifing  readlnefs, 
 and  without  once  mifting,  as  I  remember.  And  in  anfwering 
 feveral  of  them  which  refpefted  deliverance  from  fin,  they  were 
 much  affefted,  and  melted  with  the  hopes  of  that  happy  ftatc. 
 
 Quejlions  upon  the  benefits  believers  receive  from  Chrijl  at  the 
 reJurreSlion. 
 
 Q.  You  fee  I  have  already  fliewn  you  what  good  things 
 Chrift  gives  his  good  people  while  they  live,  and  when  they 
 come  to  die:  now,  will  he  raife  their  bodies,  and  the  bodies 
 of  others,  to  life  again  at  the  laft  day? 
 
 A-   Yes,   they  Jhall  all  he  raife d. 
 
 Q^  Shall  they  then  have  the  fame  bodies  they  now  have? 
 
 A.  Yes. 
 
 *  The  only  way  I  hare  to  exprefs  their  "  entering  into  glory," 
 or  being  glorified  ;  there  being  no  word  in  the  Indian  language  an- 
 fwering to  that  general  term. 
 
 ^  Will 
 
T  H  E    I  N  D  I  A  N  S.  ^       443 
 
 ^  Will  their  bodies  then  be  weak,  will  they  feel  cold, 
 hunger,  thirft,  and  wearinefs,  as  they  now  do? 
 
 A.  No,  none  of  thefe  things. 
 
 ^  Will  their  bodies  ever  die  any  more  after  they  arc  rai- 
 fed  to  life?  A.  No. 
 
 Q.  Will  their  fouls  and  bodies  be  joined  together  again? 
 
 A.  Tes. 
 
 Q^  Will  God's  people  be  more  happy  then,  than  they  were 
 while  their  bodies  were  aileep?  A.  Tes. 
 
 Q.  Will  Chrilt  then  own  thefe  to  be  his  people  before  all 
 the  world?  A.  Yes. 
 
 Q^  But  God's  people  find  fo  much  fm  in  themfelves,  that 
 they  are  often  afhanied  of  themfelves,  and  will  not  Chrift  be 
 alhamed  to  own  fuch  for  his  friends  at  that  day? 
 
 A.   No,  he  vj'dl  never  he  aJJyamed  of  them. 
 
 Q.  Will  Chrill  then  rtiow  all  the  world,  that  he  has  put  a- 
 way  thefe  peoples  fms  *,  and  that  he  looks  upon  them  as  if 
 they  had  never  linned  at  all?  A.  Yes. 
 
 Qj_  Will  he  look  upon  them  as  if  they  had  never  ilnned,  for 
 the  fake  of  any  good  things  they  have  done  themfelves,  or 
 for  the  fake  of  his  righteoufnefs  accounted  to  them  as  if  it 
 was  theirs? 
 
 A.  For  the  fake  of  his  righteoufnefs  counted  to  thejn,  not  for 
 their  oiv'n  goodnefs. 
 
 Q.  Will  God's  children  then  be  as  happy  as  they  can  deflrc 
 to  be  ?  A.   Yes. 
 
 Q.  The  children  of  God  while  in  this  world,  can  but  now 
 and  then  draw  near  to  him,  and  they  are  ready  to  think  they 
 can  never  have  enough  of  God  and  Chrift,  but  will  they  have 
 enough  there,  as  much  as  they  can  delire  ? 
 
 A.  0 yeSf  enough,  enough. 
 
 Q^  Will  the  children  of  God  love  him  then  as  much  as  they 
 defire,  will  they  find  nothing  to  hinder  their  love  from  going 
 to  him  ? 
 
 A.  Nothing  at  all,  they  fh all  love  him  as  much  as  they  de- 
 fire. 
 
 Qj  Will  they  never  be  weary  of  God  and  Chrift,  and  the 
 pleafures  of  heaven,  fo  as  we  are  weary  of  our  friends  and  en- 
 joyments here,  after  we  have  been  pleafed  with  them  a  while? 
 
 A.  No,  never. 
 
 Q^  Could  God's  people  be  happy  if  they   knew  God  loved 
 
 *  The  only  way  I  have  to  cxprefs  their  being  openly — acquitted. 
 As  when  I  fpeak  of  juftification,  I  have  no  other  way  but  to  call  it 
 God's  looking  upon  us  as  good  creatures. 
 
 3  K  2  them. 
 
444     METHODS  OF  INSTRUCTING,  6f. 
 
 them,  and  yet  felt  at  the  fame  time  that  they  could  not  love 
 and  honour  him  ?  A.  No,  no. 
 
 Qj^  Will  this  then  make  God's  people  perfe^^ly  happy,  t» 
 love  God  above  all,  to  honour  him  continually,  and  to  feci  h^s 
 love  to  them?  A.  Yes. 
 
 Q.  And  will  this  happinefs  laft  for  ever  ? 
 
 A.  Tes,  for  ever,  for  ever! 
 
 Thefe  queftions,  hke  the  former,  were  anfwered  without 
 hefitation  or  miffing,  as  I  remember,  in  any  one  inftancc. 
 
 Quefiions  upon  the  duty  "which  God  requires  of  man. 
 
 £.  Has  God  let  us  know  any  thing  of  his  will,  or  what  he 
 would  have  us  to  do  to  pleafe  him?  A.  Tes. 
 
 Q^  And  does  he  require  us  to  do  his  will,  and  to  pleafe 
 him  ?  A.  Tes. 
 
 ^  Is  it  right  that  God  fhould  require  this  of  us,  has  he  *• 
 ry  buHnefs  to  com.mand  us  as  a  father  does  his  children? 
 
 A.  Tes. 
 
 Q.  Why  is  it  right  that  God  lliould  command  us  to  d» 
 what  he  plcafes? 
 
 A.  Becavfe  he  made  us,  and  gives  us  all  our  good  things. 
 
 J^.  Does  God  require  us  to  do  any  thing  that  will  hurt  us, 
 and  take  away  our  comfort  and  happinefs?  A.  No. 
 
 ^  But  God  requires  finners  to  repent  and  be  forry  for 
 their  fins,  and  to  have  their  hearts  broken ;  now,  docs  not 
 this  hurt  them,  and  take  away  their  comfort,  to  be  made  for- 
 ry, and  to  have  their  hearts  broken? 
 
 A.  No,  it  does  them  good. 
 
 Q.  Did  God  teach  man  his  will  at  iirft  by  writing  it  down 
 in  a  book,  or  did  he  put  it  into  his  heart,  and  teach  him  with- 
 out a  book  what  was  right? 
 
 A.  He  put  it  into  his  heart,  and  made  him  know  -what  he 
 Jhould  do. 
 
 S>.  Has  God  fincc  that  time  writ  down  his  will  in  a  book  ? 
 
 A.  Yes. 
 
 Q.  Has  God  written  his  whole  will  in  his  book;  has  he 
 there  told  us  all  that  he  would  have  us  believe  and  do? 
 
 A.  Yes. 
 
 Q.  What  need  was  there  of  this  book,  if  God  at  firft  put 
 his  will  into  the  heart  ot  man,  and  made  him  feel  what  he 
 fhould  do? 
 
 A .  ?  here  71  as  need  of  it,  hecaufe  u<e  have  finned,  and  made. 
 910'  heai'ts  blind. 
 
 ^  Ar4 
 
DIFFICULTIES    A  T  T  ENDING,  6<?.      445 
 
 ^  And  has  God  writ  down  the  fame  things  in  his  book, 
 that  he  at  firft  put  into  the  heart  of  man?  A.  Tes. 
 
 In  this  manner- 1  endeavour  to  adapt  my  inftruftions  to  the 
 capacities  of  my  people ;  although  they  may  perhaps  feem 
 ftrange  to  others  who  have  never  experienced  the  difficulty  of 
 the  work.  And  thefe  I  have  given  an  account  of,  are  the  me- 
 thods I  am  from  time  to  time  purfuing,  in  order  to  inftru6l 
 them  in  the  principles  of  Chriftianiiy.  And  1  think  I  may 
 fay,  it  is  my  great  concern  that  thefe  inftrudions  be  given 
 them  in  fuch  a  lyianner,  that  they  may  not  only  be  doiirinally 
 taught,  but  duly  affc£ied  thereby,  that  divine  truths  may 
 come  to  them,  "  not  m  word  only,  but  in  power,  and  in  the 
 "  Holy  Ghoft,"  and  be  received  "  not  as  the  word  of  man." 
 
 Difficulties  attending  the  Chriftianizing  of  the  Indians. 
 
 I  fhall  now  attempt  fomething  with  relation  to  the  lafl  par- 
 ticular required  by  the  Honourable  Society  in  their  letter, 
 •viz.  To  give  fome  account  of  the  "  difficulties  I  have  already 
 "  met  with  in  my  work,  and  the  methods  1  make  ufe  of  for 
 "  furmounting  the  fame."  And  what  I  have  to  fay  upon  this 
 .fubje<fl,  I  Ihali  reduce  to  the  following  heads. 
 
 Firjl,  I  have  met  with  great  difficulty  in  my  work  among 
 thefe  Indians,  "  from  the  rooted  averfion  to  Chriftianity  that 
 **  generally  prevails  among  them."  They  are  not  only  bru- 
 tifhly  ftupid  and  ignorant  of  divine  things,  but  many  of  theni 
 are  obftinately  fet  againft  Chriftianity,  and  feem  to  abhor  e- 
 ven  the  Chriftian  name. 
 
 This  averfion  to  Chriftianity  arifes  partly  from  a  view  of 
 the  "immorality  and  vicious  behaviour  of  many  who  are  call- 
 "  ed  Chriftians."  They  obferve  that  horrid  wickednefs  in 
 nominal  Chriftians,  which  the  light  of  nature  condemns  in 
 themfelves  :  and  not  having  diltinguifliing  views  of  things, 
 are  ready  to  Look  upon  all  the  white  people  alike,  and  to 
 condemn  them  alike,  for  the  abominable  pradlices  of  fome. — 
 Hence  when  I  have  attempted  to  treat  with  them  about  Chri- 
 ftianity, they  have  frequently  objefted  the  fcandalous  prafti- 
 ces  of  Chriflians,  and  caft  in  my  teeth  all  they  could  think 
 of  that  was  odious  in  the  conduft  of  any  of  them.  Have  ob- 
 ferved  to  me,  that  the  white  people  lie,  defraud,  fteal,  and 
 drink  worfe  than  the  Indians;  that  they  have  taught  the  In- 
 dians thefe  things,  efpecialiy  the  latter  of  them;  who  before 
 the  coming  of  the  Englifh,  knew  of  no  fuch  thing  as  ftrong 
 4rink:  that  the  Englifh  have,  by  thefe  means^  made  them  quar- 
 rel 
 
44^     DIFFICULTIES  ATTENDING  THE 
 
 jcl  and  kill  one  another;  and>  in  a  word,  brought  them  to  the 
 pradicc  of  all  thofe  vices  that  now  prevail  among  them.  So 
 that  they  arc  now  vaftly  more  vicious,  as  well  as  much  more 
 iniferrbie,  than  they  were  before  the  coming  ot  the  white 
 people  into  the  country. 
 
 Thclc,  and  fuch  like  objcftions,  they  frequently  make  a- 
 gainfl  Chriftianity,  which  are  not  eafily  anlwered  to  their 
 iatisfaftion;  many  of  them  being /i^t^j-  too  notoriously  true. 
 
 The  only  way  I  have  to  take  in  order  lo  furinount  this  dif- 
 ficulty, is  to  diflingulli  between  nominal  and  real  Chriflians ; 
 .ind  to  fhew  them,  that  the  ill  conduft  of  many  of  the/crmrr 
 proceed  not  from  their  being  Chriftians,  but  from  their  being 
 Chi  iflians  only  in  name,  not  in  heart,  &c.  To  which  it  has 
 fometimes  been  objefted,  that  if  all  thoie  who  will  cheat  the 
 Indians  are  Chriftians  only  in  name,  there  are  but  few  left  in 
 the  country  to  be  Chriftians  i«  heart.  This,  and  many  other 
 of  rhe  remarks  they  pafs  upon  the  white  people,  and  their 
 miicarriages,  I  am  forced  to  own,  and  cannot  but  grant,  that 
 jnany  nomiral  Chriftians  are  more  abominably  wicked  than 
 the  Indians.  But  then  I  attempt  to  fhow  them,  that  there 
 arc  fome  who  feel  the  power  of  Chriftianity,  that  are  not  fo. 
 And  I  aflc  them,  when  they  ever  faw  me  guilty  of  the  vices 
 they  complain  of,  and  charge  Chriftians  in  general  with;'  But 
 ftill  the  great  difficulty  is,  that  the  people  who  live  back  in 
 the  country  neareft  to  them,  and  the  traders  that  go  among 
 them,  are  generally  of  the  moft  irreligious  and  vicious  fort ; 
 and  the  conduct  of  one  or  two  perfons,  be  it  never  fo  exem- 
 plary, is  not  fufficient  to  counterbalance  the  vicious  behaviour 
 of  fo  many  of  the  fame  denomination,  and  fo  to  recommend 
 Chriftianity  to  Pagans. 
 
 Another  thing  that  ferves  to  make  them  more  averfe  to 
 Chriftianity,  is  a  "fear  of  being  enllaved."  .  They  are,  per- 
 haps, fome  of  the  moft  jealous  people  living,  and  extremely 
 averfe  to  a  ftate  of  fcrvitude,  and  hence  are  always  afraid  of 
 fjme  defign  forming  againft  them.  Eefides,  they  feem  to 
 have  no  fentiments  of  generofiry,  benevolence,  and  goodnefs; 
 that  if  any  thing  be  propofed  to  them,  as  being  for  their  good. 
 They  are  ready  rather  to  fufpe^,  that  there  is  at  bottom  ibme 
 d(  fgn  forming  againft  them,  than  that  fuch  prcpofals  flow 
 fiom  goodwill  to  them,  and  a  dciue  of  their  welfare.  And 
 hence,  when  I  have  attempted  to  reccmimend  Chriftiani- 
 ty to  their  acccptar.ce,  they  have  Jomctimes  objc6Ved,  that 
 the  \chite  people  have  come  among  them,  have  cheated  them 
 out  of  their  land?,  driven  them  back  to  the  mountains,  from 
 the  plcafant  places  they  ufed  to  enjoy  by  the  fca-ftdc,  6c.: 
 
 that 
 
CHRISTIANIZINGOF  THEINDIANS.  447 
 
 that  therefore  they  have  no  reafon  to  think  the  white  people 
 are  now  feeking  their  weU'are  ;  but  rather  that  they  have 
 fent  me  out  to  draw  them  together,  under  a  pretence  of  kind- 
 nefs  to  them,  that  they  may  have  an  opportunity  to  make 
 flaves  of  them,  as  they  do  of  the  poor  negroes,  or  elfe  to 
 fhip  them  on  board  their  velfels,  and  make  them  fight  with 
 their  enemies,  ^c.  Thus  they  have  oftentimes  conitrued  all 
 the  kindnefs  I  could  fliew  them,  and  the  hardftiips  I  have  en- 
 dured in  order  to  treat  with  them  about  Chriflianity.  "  He 
 "  never  would  (fay  they)  take  all  this  pains  to  do  us  good, 
 "  he  muft  have  fome  wicked  delign  to  hurt  us  fome  way  or 
 "  other."  And  to  give  them  alTurance  of  the  contrary,  is 
 not  an  eafy  matter,  while  there  arc  fo  many,  who  (agreeabb 
 to  their  apprehenfiosd)  are  only  "  feeking  their  own,"  not 
 the  good  of  others. 
 
 To  remove  this  difficulty  I  inform  them,  that  I  am  not 
 fent  out  among  them  by  thofe  perfons  in  thefe  provinces, 
 M'ho,  they  fuppofe,  have  cheated  them  out  of  their  lands  ;- 
 but  by  pious  people  at  a  great  diftance,  who  never  had  an 
 inch  of  their  lands,  nor  ever  thought  of  doing  them  any  hurt, 
 6c. 
 
 But  here  will  arife  fo  many  frivolous  and  impertinent 
 queftions,  that  it  would  tire  one's  patience,  and  wear  out. 
 one's  fpirits  to  hear  theai ;  fuch  as  that,  "  But  why  did  not 
 '•  thefe  good  people  fend  you  to  teach  us  before,  while  we  had 
 "  our  lands  down  by  tlie  fea-fide,  <^c.  If  they  had  fent  you 
 "  then,  we  ftiould  likely  have  heard  you,  and  turned  Chri- 
 "  ftians."  The  poor  creatures  ftill  imagining,  that  I  fhouIJ 
 be  much  beholding  to  them,  in  cafe  they  would  hearken  to 
 Chriftianity ;  and  infmuating,  that  this  was  a  favour  they 
 could  not  now  be  fo  good  as  to  Ihew  me,  feeing  they  had  re- 
 ceived fo  many  injuries  from  the  ivhite  people. 
 
 Another  fpring  of  averfion  to  Chriftianity  in  the  Indians, 
 is,  "  their  ftrong  attachment  to  their  own  religious  notions, 
 **  (if  they  may  be  called  religious),  and  the  early  prejudices 
 "  they  have  imbibed  in  favour  of  Llicir  own  frantic  arid  riJi- 
 "  culous  kind  of  worfhip."  What  their  notions  of  Gci  arc, 
 in  their  Pagan  ftate,  is  hard  precifcly  to  determine.  I  hive 
 taken  much  pains  to  inquire  of  my  Chriftian  people,  whether 
 they,  before  their  acquaintance  with  Chriftianity,  imagined 
 there  was  a  plurality  of  great  invifible  powers,  or  whether 
 they  fuppofcd  but  me  fuch  being,  and  worfhipped  him  in  a 
 variety  of  forms  and  fhapes  :  but  cannot  learn  any  thing  of 
 them  fo  diftinft  as  to  be  fully  fatisfying  upon  the  point. 
 Their  notions  in  that  ftate  were  fo  prodigioully  dark  and  con- 
 
 fufed, 
 
448    DIFFICULTIES  ATTENDING  THE 
 
 fufed,  that  they  feemed  not  to  know  what  they  thought  themj 
 /elves.     But  i'o  far  as  I  can  learn,  they  had  a  notion  of  a  plu- 
 rality of  invifible  deities,  and  paid  fome  kind  of  homage  to 
 them  promiicuaufly,    under  a   great   variety   of  forms   and 
 ihapes.     And  it  is  certain,  thofe  who  yet  remain  Pagans  pay 
 fome  kind  of  fuperftitious  reverence  to  beafts,  birds,  filhes, 
 and  even  reptiles ;  that  is,  fome  to  one  kind  of  animal,  and 
 fame  to  another.    They  do  not  indeed  fuppofe  a  divine  power 
 effential  to,  or  inhering  in  thefe  creatures,  but  that  fome  in- 
 Tifible  beings  (I  cannot  learn  that  it  is  always  one  fuch   being 
 only,  but  divers ;  not  diftinguifhed   from  each  other  by  cer- 
 tain names,  but  only   notionally)  communicate  to  thele  ani- 
 mals Si  great  power^  either  one  or  other  of  them,  (juft  as  it 
 happens),  or  perhaps  fometimes   all   of  them,  and   fo   make 
 thefe  creatures   the  immediate  authors  of  good  to  certaia 
 perfons.     Whence  fach  a  creature  becomes  facrcd  to  the  pcr- 
 fons  to  whom  he  is  fuppofed  to  be  the  immediate  author  of 
 good,  and  through  him  they  muft  worfhipthe  invifible  powers, 
 though  to  others  he  is  no  more  than  another  creature.     And 
 perhaps  another  animal  is  looked  upon  to  be  the  immediate 
 author  of  good  to  another,  and   confequently  he  muft  wor- 
 fhip  the  invifible  powers  in  that  animal.     And  I  have  known 
 a  Pagan  burn  fine  tobacco  'for  incenfe,  in  order  to  appeafe 
 the  anger  of  that  invifible  power  which  he  fuppofed  prefided 
 •ver  rattle-frakes,  becaufe  one  of  thefe  animals  was  killed  by 
 another  Indian  near  his  houfe. 
 
 But  after  the  ftrifteft  inquiry  refpccting  their  notions  of 
 the  Deity,  I  find,  that  in  ancient  times,  before  the  coming 
 •f  the  white  people,  fome  fuppofed  there  were  four  invifible 
 powers,  who  prefided  over  the  four  corners  of  the  earth.  O- 
 thers  imagined  the  fun  to  be  the  only  deity,  and  that  all 
 things  were  made  by  him :  others  at  the  fame  time  having  a 
 eonfufed  notion  of  a  certain  body  or  fountain  of  deity,  fome- 
 what  like  the  anima  mundi,  fo  frequently  mentioned  by  the 
 more  learned  ancient  Heathens,  diftufing  itfelf  to  various  a- 
 jjimals,  and  even  to  inanimate  things,  making  them  the  im- 
 mediate authors  of  good  to  certain  perfons,  as  was  before 
 ©bferved,  with  refpect  to  various  fuppofed  deities.  But  after 
 the  coming  of  the  white  people,  they  feemed  to  fuppofe  there 
 were  three  deities,  and  three  only,  becaufe  they  faw  people 
 «f  three  different  kinds  of  complexion,  viz.  Engliih,  Ne- 
 groes, and  themfelves. 
 
 It  is  a  notion  pretty  generally  prevailing  among  them,  that 
 it  was  not  the  fame  God  made  them,  who  made  us ;  but  that 
 they  were  made  after  the  white  people  ;  which  further  Ihews, 
 
 that 
 
CHRISTIANIZING  OFTHEINDIANS.  449 
 
 that  they  iaiagine  a  plurality  of  divine  powers.  And  I  fancy 
 they  fuppofe  their  God  gained  fome  fpecial  fkill  by  feeing  the 
 white  people  made,  and  fa  made  them  better  :  for  it  is  cer- 
 tain they  look  upon  themfelves,  and  their  methods  of  living, 
 (which,  they  fay,  their  God  exprefsly  prefcribed  for  them), 
 vaflly  preferable  to  the  white  people,  and  their  methods. 
 And  hence  will  frequently  fit  and  laugh  at  them,  as  being 
 good  for  nothing  elfc  but  to  plow  and  fatigue  themfelves  with 
 hard  labour;  while  they  enjoy  the  fatibfaftion  of  ftretching 
 themfelves  on  the  ground,  and  lleeping  as  much  as  they  pleafe; 
 and  have  no  other  trouble  but  now  and  then  to  chafe  the  deer, 
 which  is  often  attended  with  pleafure  rather  than  pain. 
 Hence,  by  the  way,  many  of  them  look  upon  it  as  difgrace- 
 ful  for  them  to  become  Chriftians,  as  it  would  be  efteemed 
 among  Chriftians  for  any  to  become  Pagans.  And  now  al- 
 though they  fuppofe  our  religion  will  do  well  enough  for  us, 
 becaufe  prefcribed  by  our  God,  yet  it  is  no  ways  proper  for 
 them,  becaufe  not  of  the  fame  make  and  original.  Tliis  they 
 have  fometimes  offered  as  a  reafon  v/hy  they  did  not  incline 
 to  hearken  to  Chriftianity. 
 
 They  feem  to  have  fome  confufed  ';  )tion  about  a  future 
 flatc  of  exiftence,  and  many  of  them  imagine  that  the  chi- 
 ehimg,  (L  c.  the  fliadow),  or  what  furvives  the  body,  will 
 at  death  ^ofouthiuard,  and  in  an  unknown  but  curious  place, 
 will  enjoy  fome  kind  of  happinefs,  fuch  as,  hunting,  feafl- 
 jng,  dancing,  and  the  like.  And  what  they  fuppofe  wiii  con- 
 tribute much  to  their  happinefs  in  that  ftate  is,  that  they 
 fhall  never  be  weary  of  thofe  entertainments.  It  feems  by 
 this  notion  of  their  goingy?u(Mx(;t2/^  to  obtain- happinefs,  as 
 if  they  had  their  courfe  into  thele  parts  of  the  world  from 
 fome  very  cold  climate,  and  found  the  further  they  went 
 fnuthward  the  more  comfortable  they  were  ;  and  thence  con- 
 cluded, that  perfect  felicity  was  to  be  found  further  towards 
 the  fame  point. 
 
 They  feem  to  have  fome  faint  and  gliirimcrlng  notion  about 
 rewards  and  pun'ijhments,  or  at  leaft  happinefs  and  imfery  in 
 a  future  ftate,  that  is,  fome  that  I  have  converfed  with,  though 
 others  feem  to  know  of  no  fuch  thing.  Thofe  that  fuppuikfc 
 this,  feem  to  imagine  that  moft  will  be  happy,  and  that  thofe 
 who  are  not  fo,  will  be  punifhed  only  with  privation,  being 
 only  excluded  the  walls  of  that  good  world  where  happy  Xouls 
 fhall  dwell. 
 
 Thefe  rewards  and  punifhments  they  fuppofe  to  depend  en- 
 tirely upon  their  condu(n:  with  relation  to  the  duties  of  the 
 re6and  t3b]e,  i.  c  their  behaviour  towards  niankind,  and  r::cm, 
 
 q   L  lk> 
 
45©  DIFFICULTIES  ATTENDING  THE 
 
 fo  far  as  I  can  fee,  not  to  imagine  that  they  have  any  refer- 
 ence to  their  religious  notions  or  practices,  or  any  thing  that 
 relates  to  the  worlhip  of  God.  I  remember  I  once  confulted 
 a  very  ancient,  but  intelligent  Indian  upon  this  point,  for  my 
 own  fatisfaftion  ;  alked  him  whether  the  Indians  of  old  times 
 had  fuppofed  there  was  any  thing  of  the  man  that  would  fur- 
 vive  the  body?  He  replied.  Yes.  I  afked  him,  where  they 
 fuppofed  its  abode  would  be?  He  replied,  "  It  would  go 
 *'  fbuthward."^  I  afked  him  further,  whether  it  would  be 
 happy  there?  He  anfwered,  after  a  confidcrable  paufe,  "  that 
 "  the  fouls  of  good  folks  would  be  happy,  and  the  fouls  of 
 *'  bad  folks  miferable."  I  then  a  iked  him,  -who  he  called 
 bad  folks  P  His  anfwer  (as  I  remember)  was,  "  Thofe  who  lie, 
 "  fteal,  quarrel  with  their  neighbours,  are  unkind  to  their 
 "  friends,  and  efpecially  to  aged  parents,  and,  in  a  word, 
 "  fuch  as  are  a  plague  to  mankind."  Thefe  were  his  bttd 
 folks  ;  but  not  a  word  was  faid  about  their  neglet^  of  divine 
 worfhip,  and  their  badnefs  in  that  refpeft.  • 
 
 They  have  indeed  fome  kind  of  religious  worfhip,  are  fre- 
 quently offering  facrifices  to  fome  (uppofed  invifible  powers, 
 and  are  very  ready  to  impute  their  calamities  in  the  preftnt 
 •world,  to  the  negleft  of  thefe  facrifices ;  but  there  is  no  ap- 
 pearance of  reverence  and  devotion  in  the  homage  they  pay 
 them ;  and  what  they  do  of  this  nature,  feems  to  be  done 
 only  to  appeafe  the  fuppofed  anger  of  their  deities,  to  engage 
 them  to  be  placable  to  them felves,  and  do  them  no  hurt,  or 
 at  mofl,  only  to  invite  thtfc  po-wers  to  fucceed  them  in  thofe 
 enterprifes  they  are  engaged  in  refpefling  the  prefent  life.  So 
 that  in  offering  thefe  facrifices,  they  feem  to  have  no  re- 
 ference to  a  future  flate,  but  only  to  prefent  comfort.  And 
 this  is  the  account  my  interpreter  always  gives  me  of  this 
 matter.  "  They  facrifice  (fays  he)  that  they  may  have  fuc- 
 "  cefs  in  hunting  and  other  affairs,  and  that  ficknefs  and 
 "  other  calamities,  may  not  befal  them,  which  they  fear  in 
 "  the  prefent  world,  in  cafe  of  negleft;  but  they  do  not  fup- 
 ^'  pofe  God  will  ever  punifh  them  in  the  coming  world  for 
 '•  neglefting  to  facrifice,"  6c.  And  indeed  they  feem  to 
 i'Tiagine,  that  thofe  whom  they  call  bad  folks,  are  excluded 
 from  the  company  of  good  people  in  that  ftate,  not  fo  much 
 bccaufe  God  remembers,,  and  is  determined  to  punifh  thera 
 for  their  fins  of  any  kind,  either  immediately  againft  himfelf 
 or  their  neighbour,  as  becaufe  they  would  be  z  plague  to  fo- 
 ciety,  and  would  render  others  unhappy  if  admitted  to  dwell 
 with  them.  So  that  they  are  excluded  rather  oi  ntceffty^ 
 than  by  God  acling  as  a  righteous  jud-je. 
 
 Thcv 
 
CHRISTIANIZING  OF  THE  INDIANS.  451 
 
 They  give  much  heea  to  dj-eanis,  becaufe  they  fuppofe 
 theic  invilible  powers  give  them  directions  at  fuch  times  a- 
 bout  certain  affairs,  and  fometime  informs  them  what  anhnal 
 they  would  chufe  to  be  worfhipped  in.  They  are  likeviil'e 
 much  attached  to  the  traditions  and  fabulous  notions  of  their 
 fathers,  who  have  informed  them  of  divers  miracles  that  were 
 anciently  wrought  among  the  Indians,  which  they  firmly 
 believe,  and  thence  look  upon  their  anceftors  to  have  been 
 the  bcft  of  men.  They  alio  mention  fome  wonderful  things 
 which,  they  fay,  have  happened  fmce  the  memory  of  fome 
 who  are  now  living.  One  I  remember  affirmed  to  me,  that 
 himfelf  had  once  been  dead  four  days,  that  mofl  of  his  friends 
 in  that  time  were  gathered  together  to  his  funeral,  and  that 
 he  fhould  have  been  buried,  but  that  fome  of  his  relations 
 at  a  great  diflance,  who  were  fent  for  upon  that  occafion, 
 were  not  arrived,  before  whofe  coming  he  came  to  life  again. 
 In  this  time,  he  fays,  he  went  to  the  place  where  the  fun 
 rifes^  (imagining  the  earth  to  be  plain),  and  direftly  over  that 
 place,  at  a  great  height  in  the  air,  he  was  admitted,  he  fays, 
 into  a  great  houfe,  which  he  fuppofes  was  feveral  miles  in 
 length,  and  faw  many  wonderful  things,  too  tedious  as  well 
 as  ridiculous  to  mention.  Another  perfon,  a  woman,  whom 
 I  have  not  feen,  but  been  credibly  informed  of  by  the  Indians, 
 declares,  that  fhe  was  dead  feveral  days,  that  her  foul  went 
 fouthward,  and  feafied  and  danced  with  the  happy  fpirits,  and 
 that  file  found  all  things  exactly  agreeable  to  the  Indian  notions 
 of  a  future  ftate. 
 
 Thefe  fupcrftitious  notions  and  traditions,  and  this  kind  of 
 ridiculous  worfliip  I  have  mentioned,  they  are  extremely  at- 
 tached to,  and  the  prejudice  they  have  imbibed  in  favour  of 
 thefe  things,  renders  them  not  a  little  averfe  to  the  dodlrines 
 of  Chriftianity.  Whence  fome  of  them  have  told  me,  when 
 I  have  endeavoured  to  inftruft  them,  "  that  their  fathers  had 
 "  taught  them  already,  and  that  they  did  not  want  to  learn 
 "  now." 
 
 It  will  be  too  tedious  to  give  any  confiderable  account  of 
 the  methods  I  make  ufe  of  for  furmounting  this  difficulty. 
 J  will  juft  fay,. I  endeavour,  as  much  as  poilible,  to  fliew  them 
 the  inconjijlency  of  their  own  notions,  and  fo  to  confound 
 them  out  of  their  own  mouths.  But  I  mufl:  alfo  fay,  I  have 
 fometimes  been  almoll  nonplufTed  with  them,  and  fcarce 
 knew  what  to  anfwer  them  :  but  never  have  been  more  per- 
 plexed with  them,  than  when  they  Jiave  pretended  to  yield  to 
 me  as  knowing  more  than  they,  and  confequently  have  aflccd 
 me  numbers  of  impertinent,  and   yet   difficult  queftion'^,  as, 
 
 3   L  2  "  How 
 
452  DIFFICULTIES  ATTENDING  THE 
 
 •*  How  the  Indians  came  firft  into  this  part  of  the  world,  a» 
 "  way  from  all  the  white  people,  if  what  I  faid  was  true,"  viz. 
 that  the  fame  God  made  them  who  made  us?  "  How  the  In- 
 "  dians  became  black,  if  they  had  the  fame  original  parents 
 "  with  the  white  people?"  And  numbers  more  of  the  like 
 nature. 
 
 Thefe  things,  I  muft  fay,  hax'e  been  not  a  little  difficult 
 and  difcouraging,  efpecially  when  withal,  fomc  of  the  In- 
 dians have  appeared  angry  and  malicious  againft  Chriflianity. 
 
 What  further  contributes  to  their  averlion  to  Chriftianity 
 is,  the  influence  that  their  powwows  (conjurers  or  diviners) 
 have  upon  them.  Thefe  are  a  fort  of  perfons  who  are  fup- 
 pafed  to  have  a  power  of  foretelling  future  events,  of  reca- 
 ver'ir.g  the  fick,  at  leaft  oftentimes,  and  of  charming,  inchant- 
 ing,  or  poifoning  perfons  to  death  by  their  magic  divinations. 
 And  their  fpirit,  in  its  various  operations,  fcems  to  be  a  Sa- 
 tanical  imitation  of  the  fpirit  of  prophecy  that  the  church  in 
 early  ages  was  favoured  with.  Some  of  thefe  diviners  arc 
 endowed  with  this  fpirii  in  infancy  ; — others  in  adult  age. — 
 It  feems  not  to  depend  upon  their  own  will,  nor  to  be  acqui- 
 red by  any  endeavours  of  the  perfon  who  is  the  fubjefl  of  it, 
 although  it  is  fuppofed  to  be  given  to  children  fometimes  in 
 confequence  of  fome  means  the  parents  ufe  with  them  for 
 that  purpofc ;  one  of  which  is  to  make  the  child  fwallow  a 
 fmall  living  frog,  after  having  performed  fume  fuperftitious 
 rites  and  ceremonies  upon  it.  They  are  not  under  the  in- 
 fluence of  this  fpirit  always  alike, — but  it  comes  upon  them  at 
 times.  And  thofe  who  are  endowed  with  it,  are  accounted 
 Angularly  favoured. 
 
 I  have  laboured  to  gain  fome  acquaintance  with  this  afTalr 
 of  their  conjuration,  and  have  for  that  end  confulted  and 
 queried  with  the  man  mentioned  in  my  Journal  of  May  9. 
 who,  fince  his  convcrfion  to  Chriftianity,  has  endeavoured  to 
 give  me  the  bcfl  intelligence  he  could  of  this  matter.  But  it 
 feems  to  be  fuch  a  viy fiery  of  in'quity^  that  1  cannot  well  un- 
 derftand  it,  jind  docs  not  know  oftentimes  what  ideas  to  affix 
 to  the  terms  he  makes  ufe  of;  and,  fo  far  as  I  can  learn,  he 
 himfelf  has  not  any  clear  notions  of  the  thing,  now  his  fpirit 
 of  divination  is  gone  from  him.  However,  the  manner  in 
 which  he  fays  he  obtained  this  fpirit  of  divination  was  this, 
 he  was  admitted  into  the  prefence  of  z  great  man,  who  in- 
 form.ed  him,  that  he  loved,  pitied,  and  defired  to  do  hira 
 good.  It  was  not  in  this  world  that  he  faw  the  great  man, 
 but  in  a  world  above  at  a  vafl  diflance  from  this.  The  great 
 mgn,   he   fays,    was  clothed  with  the  day;  yea,  with   the 
 
 brightcft 
 
CHRISTIANIZING  OF  THE  I  N  D  I  A N  S.  453 
 
 biighteft  day  he  ever  faw ;  a  day  of  many  years,  yea,  of  ever- 
 lafting  continuance!  this  whole  world,  he  fays,  was  drawn 
 up  m  him,  fo  that  in  him,  the  earth,  and  all  things  in  it, 
 might  be  fcen.  I  aflced  him,  if  rocks,  mountains,  and  feas 
 was  drawn  upon,  or  appeared  in  him?  He  replied,  that  every 
 thing  that  was  beautiful  and  lovely  in  the  earth  was  upon  him, 
 and  might  be  feen  by  looking  on  him,  as  well  as  if  one  was 
 on  the  earth  to  take  a  view  of  them  there.  By  the  fide  of 
 the  great  man,  he  fays,  flood  his  JJjaciow  or  fpirit;  for  hc 
 ufed  [chichung),  the  word  they  commonly  make  ufe  of  to 
 Gxprefs  that  of  the  man  which  furvives  the  body,  which  word 
 properly  fignifies  a  Jhadoiv.  This  fliadow,  he  fays,  was  as 
 lovely  as  the  man  himlelf,  and  filled  all  places,  and  was  mofl 
 agreeable  as  well  as  wonderful  to  him. —  Here  he  fays,  he  tar- 
 ried fome  time,  and  was  unfpeakably  entertained  and  delight- 
 ed with  a  view  of  the  great  man,  of  his  fhadow  or  Ipnit, 
 and  of  all  things  in  him.  And  what  is  moft  of  all  aflonifhing, 
 he  imagines  all  this  to  have  pafTed  before  he  was  born.  He 
 never  had  been,  he  fays,  in  this  world  at  that  time.  And 
 what  confirms  him  in  the  belief  of  this,  is,  that  the  great 
 man  told  him,  that  he  muft  come  down  to  earth,  be  born  of 
 yj<c^  a  woman,  meet  with  _/«£•/>  znd  fuch  things,  and  in  par- 
 ticular, that  he  fhould  once  in  his  life  be  guilty  of  tnurder. 
 At  this  he  was  difpleafed,  and  told  the  great  man,  he  would 
 never  murder.  But  the  great  man  replied,  "  I  have  faid  it, 
 *'  and  it  fhall  be  fo."  Which  has  accordingly  happened. 
 At  this  time,  he  fays,  the  great  man  afked  him  what  he  would 
 chufe  in  life.  He  replied,  firfl:  to  be  a  hunter,  and  afterwards 
 '  to  be  a  powwoiv  or  diviner.  Whereupon  the  great  min  told 
 him,  he  fliould  have  what  he  defired,  and  that  hhjhadoiu 
 fliould  go  along  with  him  down  to  earth,  and  be  with  him 
 for  ever.  There  was,  he  fays,  ail  this  time  no  words  fpoken 
 between  them.  The  conference  was  not  carried  on  by  any 
 human  language,  but  they  had  a  kind  of  mental  inreliigence 
 of  each  others  thoughts,  difpofitions,  and  propofals.  After 
 this,  he  fays,  he  faw  the  great  man  no  more;  but  fuppofes 
 he  now  came  down  to  earth  to  be  born,  but  the  fpirit  or  fha- 
 dow of  the  great  man  ftill  attended  him,  and  ever  after  con- 
 tinued  to  appear  to  him  in  dreams  and  other  ways,  until  he 
 felt  the  power  of  God's  word  upon  his  heart ;  fince  which  it 
 has  entirely  left  him. 
 
 This  fpirit,  he  fays,  ufed  fometimcs  to  direct  him  in  dreams 
 to  go  to  luch  a  place  and  hunt,  afTuring  him  he  fhould  there 
 meet  with  fuccefs,  which  accordingly  proved  fo.  And  when 
 he  had  been  there  fome  time,  the  fpirit  would  order  him   to 
 
 anothef 
 
454    DIFFICULTIES  ATTENDING  THE 
 
 another  place  So  that  he  had  fuccefs  in  hunting,  acco:;ing 
 to  the  great  man's  promife  made  to  him  at  the  time  ol  his 
 chufing  this  employment. 
 
 There  were  fome  times  when  this  fpirit  came  upon  him  in 
 ^fpecial  manner,  and  he  was  full  of  what  he  faw  in  die  great 
 man;  and  then,  he  fays,  he  was  all  light,  and  not  only  light 
 himfelf,  but  it  was  light  all  around  him,  fo  that  he  could  Ice 
 through  men,  and  knew  the  thoughts  of  their  hearts,  cc. 
 Thefe  depths  of  Satan  I  leave  to  others  to  fathom  or  to  dive 
 into  as  they  pleafe,  and  do  not  pretend,  for  my  own  part,  to 
 know  what  ideas  to  affix  to  fuch  terms,  and  cannot  well  gueis 
 what  conceptions  of  things  thefe  creatures  have  at  thefe 
 times  when  they  call  them felves  «////§/;/.  But  my  interpre- 
 ter tells  me,  that  he  heard  one  of  them  tell  a  certain  Indian 
 the  fccret  thoughts  of  his  heart,  which  he  had  never  divulged. 
 The  cafe  was  this,  the  Indian  was  bitten  with  a  fnake,  and  was 
 in  extreme  pain  with  the  bite.  Whereupon  the  diviner  (who 
 was  applied  to  for  his  recovery)  told  him,  that  ztfuch  a  time 
 he  had  promifed,  that  the  next  deer  he  killed,  he  would  fa- 
 crifice  it  to  fome  great  poxver,  but  had  broken  his  promife. 
 And  now,  faid  he,  that  great  power  has  ordered  this  fnake 
 to  bice  you  for  your  neglect.  The  Indian  confeiTed  it  was 
 fo,  but  faid  he  had  never  told  any  body  of  it.  But  as  Satan,  no 
 doubt,  excited  the  Indian  to  make  that  promife,  it  was  no 
 wonder  he  Ihould  be  able  to  communicate  the  matter  to  the 
 conjurer. 
 
 Thefe  things  ferve  to  fix  them  down  in  their  idolatry,  and 
 to  make  them  believe  there  is  no  fafety  to  be  expe£Ved,  but 
 by  their  continuing  to  offer  fuch  facrifces.  And  the  influ- 
 ence that  thefe  powwows  have  upon  them,  either  through 
 the  efteem  or  fear  they  have  of  them,  is'  no  fmall  hindrance 
 to  their  embracing  Chriftianity. 
 
 To  remove  this  difficulty,  I  have  laboured  to  fliew  the  In- 
 dians, that  thefe  diviners  have  no  pov/er  to  recover  the  fick, 
 when  the  God  whom  Chriftians  ferve,  has  determined  them 
 for  death,  and  that  the  fuppofed  great  poiver  who  influences 
 thefe  diviners  has  himfelf  no  power  in  this  cafe  :  and  that  if 
 they  feem  to  recover  any  by  their  magic  charvrs,  they  are 
 only  fuch  as  the  God  I  preached  to  them,  had  determined 
 ffiould  recover,  and  who  would  have  recovered  without  their 
 conjurations,  6c.  And  when  I  have  apprehended  them  a- 
 fraid  of  embracing  Chriftianity,  left  they  ffiould  be  inchant- 
 cd  and  poifoned,  I  have  endeavoured  to  relieve  their  minds  of 
 this  fear,  by  afking  thern,  why  their  powwows  did  not  in- 
 cbsnt  and  poifon  mc,  feeing  they  had  as  much  reafon  to  hate 
 
 me 
 
CHRISTIANIZING  OF  THE  INDIANS.  455 
 
 mc  for  preaching  to,  and  defiring  them  to  become  Chriftians, 
 as  they  could  have  to  hate  them  in  cafe  they  fhould  a<ftually 
 become  fuch.  And  that  they  might  have  an  evidence  of  the 
 power  and  goodnefs  of  God  engaged  for  the  proteftion  of 
 Chriftians,  I  ventured  to  bid  a  chail.nge  to  all  their  powwow* 
 and  g"eat  powers  to  do  their  worft  on  me  firft  of  all,  and 
 thus  laboured  to  tread  down  their  influence. 
 
 Many  things  further  might  be  offered  upon  this  head,  but 
 thu.^  much  may  fuffice  for  a  reprefentation  of  their  averflon 
 to,  and  prejudice  againft  Chriftianity,  the  fprings  of  it,  and 
 the  difficulties  thence  arifing. 
 
 Secondly,  Another  great  difficulty  I  have  met  with  in  my 
 attempts  to  Chriftianize  the  Indians,  has  been  to  "convey  di- 
 *'  vine  truths  to  their  underftandings,  and  to  gain  their  af- 
 "  fent  to  them  as  fuch." 
 
 In  the  firfl:  place,  I  laboured  under  a  very  great  difadvan^ 
 tage  for  want  of  an  interpreter,  who  had  a  good  degree  of 
 io£irinal  as  well  as  experimental  knowledge  of  divine  things  : 
 in  bjth  which  refpedls  my  prefent  interpreter  was  very  de- 
 fective when  I  firft  employed  him,  as  I  noted  in  the  account 
 I  before  gave  of  him.  And  it  was  fometimes  extremely  dif- 
 couraging  to  me,  when  I  could  not  make  him  underftand 
 what  1  defigned  to  communicate  ;  when  truths  of  the  laft  im^ 
 portance  ?i^i^czxcd  fooliJJmefs  to  him  for  want  of  a  fpiritual  un- 
 derftanding  and  relidi  of  them ;  and  when  he  addreiTcd  the 
 Indians  in  a  lifelefs  indifferent  manner,  without  any  heart-en- 
 gagement or  fervency ;  and  efpecially  when  he  appeared  heart- 
 lels  and  irrefolute  about  making  attempts  for  the  converlion 
 of  the  Indians  to  Chriftianity,  as  he  frequently  did.  For  al- 
 though he  had  a  defire  that  they  (liould  conform  to  Chriftian 
 manners,  (as  I  elfewhere  obferved),  yet  being  abundantly  ac- 
 «!iuainted  with  their  ftrong  attachment  to  their  own  fuperfli- 
 tious  notions,  and  the  difficulty  of  bringing  them  off,  and 
 having  no  fenfe  of  divine  power  and  grace,  nor  dependence 
 upon  an  almighty  Arm  for  the  accomplithment  of  this  work, 
 he  u fed  to  be  difcouraged,  and  tell  n:e,  "It  fignifies  nothing 
 "  for  us  to  try,  they  will  never  turn,*"  ^c.  So  that  he  was  a 
 diftreffing  weight  and  burden  to  me.  And  here  1  fliould  have 
 funk  fcores  of  times,  but  that  God  in  a  remarkable  manner 
 fupported  me ;  fometimes  by  giving  me  full  fatisfaflion  that 
 he  himfelf  had  called  me  to  this  work,  and  thence  a  fecrer 
 hope  that  fometime  or  other  I  might  meet  with  fuccefs  in  it ; 
 or  if  not,  that  "  my  judgment  ffiould  notwithftanding  be 
 "  with  the  Lord,  and  my  work  with  my  God."  Sometimes 
 hy  giving  me  a  fenfe  of  his  aUr.ighty  power,  and  that   "his 
 
 "  hand 
 
45^  DIFFICULTIES  ATTENDING  THE 
 
 "  hand  was  not  fhortened."  Sometimes  by  afFordlncr  rr.e  ^ 
 frefh  and  lively  view  of  feme  remarkable  freedom  and  afTui- 
 ance  I  had  been  repeatedly  favoured  with  in  prayer  for  tliC 
 ingathering  jf  thefe  Heathens  fome  years  before,  even  before 
 I  was  a  miflionary,  and  a  refrefhing  fenfe  of  the  ftabiiity  and 
 faith fiilnefs  of  the  divine  promifes,  and  that  the  prayer  of 
 faith  fhould  not  fail. 
 
 Thus  1  was  fupported  under  thefe  trials,  and  the  method 
 God  was  pleafed  to  take  for  the  removal  of  this  difficulty,  (re- 
 fpecling  my  interpreter),  I  have  fufficiently  reprefented  elfe* 
 where. 
 
 Another  thing  that  rendered  it  very  difficult  to  convey  di- 
 rine  truths  to  the  underftandings  of  the  Indians,  was  the  de- 
 feSiivenefs  of  their  language,  the  want  of  terms  to  exprefs 
 and  convey  ideas  of  fpiritual  things.  There  are  no  words  in 
 the  Indian  language  to  anfwer  our  Englifli  words,  "  Lord, 
 *'  Saviour,  falvation,  finner,  juflice,  condemnation,  faith, 
 ''  repentance,  juftification,  adoption,  fanftification,  grace, 
 ^  glory,  heaven,"  with  fcores  of  the  like  importance. 
 
 The  only  methods  I  can  make  ufe  of  for  furmounting  this 
 difficulty,  are,  either  to  defcribe  the  things  at  large  deligned 
 by  thefe  terms,  as  if  I  was  fpeaking  of  regeneration,  to  call 
 it,  the  "  heart's  being  changed"  by  God's  Spirit,  or  the 
 **  heart's  being  made  good."  Or  elfe  I  mud  introduce  the 
 Xnglilli  terms  into  their  language,  and  fix  the  precife  mean- 
 ing of  them,  that  they  may  know  what  I  intend  whenever  I 
 ufe  them. 
 
 'But  what  renders  it  much  more  difficult  to  convey  divine 
 truths  to  the  underftandings  of  thefe  Indians,  is,  that  ''there 
 ^*  feems  to  be  no  foundation  in  their  minds  to  begin  upon," 
 I  mean  no  truths  that  may  be  taken  for  granted  as  being  al- 
 ready knovv'n,  while  I  am  attempting  to  inftill  others.  And 
 divine  truths  having  fuch  a  necclTary  connedlion  with,  and  de- 
 pendence upon  each  other,  I  find  it  extremely  difficult  in  my 
 iirft  addreffes  to  Pagans  to  begin  and  difcourfe  of  them  in 
 their  proper  order  and  conneflion,  without  having  reference 
 to  truths  not  yet  known, — without  taking  for  granted  fuch 
 things  as  need  firft  to  be  taught  and  proved.  There  is  no 
 point  of  Chriftian  doctrine  but  what  they  are  either  wholly 
 ignorant  of,  or  extremely  confufed  in  their  notions  about. 
 And  therefore  it  is  necefiary  they  fhould  be  inftrufted  in  e- 
 Vcry  truth,  even  in  thofc  that  are  the  moft  eafy  and  obvious 
 to  the  underftanding,  and  which  a  perfon  educated  under 
 gofpcMight  would  be  ready  to  pafs  over  in  filencc,  as  not 
 imagining  that  any  rational  creature  could  be  ignorant  of. 
 
 Thr 
 
CHRISTIANIZING  OF  THE  INDIANS.  457 
 
 The  method  I  have  ufually  taken  in  my  firft  addrefles  to 
 Pagans,  has  been  to  introduce  myfelf  by  laying,  that  1  was 
 come  among  them  with  a  defire  and  defign  of  teaching  them 
 fome  things  which  I  prefuraed  they  did  not  know,  and  which, 
 I  trufted,  would  be  for  their  comfort  and  happinefs,  if  known, 
 defiling  they  would  give  their  attention,  and  hoping  they 
 might  meet  with  fatis faction  in  my  dil'courfe.  And  thence 
 have  proceeded  to  obferve,  that  there  are  two  things  belong- 
 ing to  every  man,  which  I  call  the  foul  and  body.  i  hefe  I 
 endeavour  to  diftingurti  from  each  other,  by  oblervingto  them, 
 that  there  is  fomething  in  them  that  is  capable  of  joy  and 
 plcafure,  when  their  bodies  are  fick  and  much  pained :  and, 
 on  the  contrary,  that  they  find  fomething  within  them,  that 
 13  fearful,  forrowful,  afhamed,  <bc.  and  confequently  very 
 uneafy,  when  their  bodies  are  in  perfect  health.  1  then  ob- 
 ferve to  them,  that  this  which  rejoices  in  them  (perhaps  at 
 the  fight  of  fome  friend  who  has  been  long  abfent)  when  their 
 bodies  are  fick  and  in  pain, — this  which  is  forrowful,  frighted, 
 afhamed,  ^c.  and  confequently  uneafy,  when  their  bodies  are 
 perfectly  at  eafe, — this  I  call  the  foul.  And  although  it  can- 
 not be  feen  like  the  other  part  of  the  man,  viz.  the  body, 
 yet  it  is  as  real  as  their  thoughts,  defires,  6c.  which  are  like- 
 wife  things  that  cannot  be  feea. 
 
 I  then  further  obferve,  that  this  part  of  the  man  which 
 thinks,  rejoices,  grieves,  drr.  will  live  after  the  body  is  dead. 
 For  the  proof  of  this,  I  produce  the  opinion  of  their  fathers, 
 vho  (as  I  am  told  by  very  aged  Indians  now  living)  always 
 fuppofed  there  was  fomething  of  the  man  that  would  furvive 
 the  body.  And  if  I  can,  for  the  proof  of  any  thing  I  affert, 
 fay,  as  St  Paul  to  the  Athenians,  "  As  certain  alfo  of  your 
 "  own  fages  have  faid,"  it  is  fufficient.  And  having  eftabliih- 
 ed  this  point,  I  next  obferve,  that  what  I  have  to  fay  to  them, 
 refpefts  the  coitfcious  part  of  this  man ;  and  that  with  relation 
 to  its  ftate  after  the  death  of  the  body  ;  and  that  I  am  not 
 come  to  treat  with  them  about  the  things  that  concern  the 
 prefent  world. 
 
 This  method  I  am  obliged  to  take,  becaufe  they  will  other- 
 wife  entirely  miftake  the  defign  of  my  preaching,  and  fuppofe 
 the  bufinefs  I  am  upon,  is  fomething  that  relates  to  the  pre- 
 fent world,  having  never  been  called  together  by  the  white 
 people  upon  any  other  occafion,  but  only  to  be  treated  with 
 about  the  fale  of  lands,  or  fome  other  fecular  bulinels.  And 
 I  find  it  almoft  impolTible  to  prevent  their  imagining  that  I 
 am  engaged  in  the  fame,  or  fuch  like  affairs,  and  to  beat  it  in-p 
 
 3   M  to 
 
45S  DIFFICULTIES  ATTENDING  THE 
 
 to  them,  that  my  concern  is  to  treat  with  them  about  their  /«(- 
 viJiltLe  part,  and  that  with  relation  to  its  future  ftatc. 
 
 But  having  thus  opened  the  way,  by  diftinguifhing  between 
 foul  and  body,  and  (hewing  the  immortality  of  the  former^ 
 and  that  my  bufmtfs  is  to  treat  with  them  in  order  to  their 
 happinclb  in  a  future  ftatc ;  I  proceed  to  difcourfe  of  the  be- 
 ing and  perfections  of  God,  particularly  of  his  "eternity, 
 *'  unity,  lelf-fufficiency,  infinite  wifdom,  and  almighty  power." 
 It  is  neceffary,  in  the  firft  place,  to  teach  them,  that 
 God  is  from  evcrlajiir.g^  and  fo  diftinguifhed  from  all  crea- 
 tures ;  though  it  ib  very  difficult  to  communicate  any  thing  of 
 that  nature  to  them,  they  having  no  terms  in  their  language 
 to  lignity  an  eternity  a  parte  ante.  It  is  likewife  necelTary  to 
 difcourle  of  the  divine  unity,  in  order  to  confute  the  notions 
 they  teem  to  have  of  a  pLurality  of  gods.  The  divine  aLL- 
 fuf^ciency  rrufl  alio  neceflarily  be  mertioned,  in  order  to  pre- 
 vent tbeis  imagining  that  God  was  unhappy  while  alone,  be- 
 fo  e  the  formation  of  his  creatures.  And  fi  mething  relpcft- 
 ing  the  divine  ivifdom  and  fou'er  feems  neceflary  to  be  infift" 
 ed  upon,  in  order  to  make  way  for  difcouifing  of  God's 
 woikb. 
 
 Having  offered  fomc  things  upon  the  divine  perfections 
 mentioned,  1  proceed  to  open  the  work  of  creation  in  gene- 
 ral, and  in  particular  God's  creation  of  man  in  a  flatc  of  up- 
 rigbtntfs  and  happinefs,  placing  them  in  a  garden  of  plealure; 
 tlit  means  and  manner  of  their  apoftafy  from  that  ftate,  and 
 lofb  of  that  h?ppinei£.  But  before  1  can  give  a  relation  of 
 their  fall  frcni  God,  I  am  cbliged  to  rrake  a  large  digrefTior, 
 in  order  to  give  an  account  of  the  original  and  circumftances 
 of  their  ten  pter,  his  capacity  of  aflun  ing  the  (hape  of  a  fer- 
 pent,  froHi  his  being  a  (pirit  without  a  body,  Cc.  W  hence  t 
 go  on  tc  fhow,  the  7ians  oi'  omx  falltn  fiate,  tie  mental  blind- 
 nef:  and  vicious  diipofjtions  our  firff  parents  then  contra£1ed 
 to  thtmJelves,  and  propagated  to  all  their  pofterity  ;  the  nu- 
 meious  calan.ities  brought  upon  them  and  theirs  by  this  apo- 
 ftaly  from  God,  and  the  expofcdnefs  of  the  whole  hviTian 
 race  to  f  trrnal  perdition.  And  thence  labour  to  fhcw  thera, 
 the  ncceflity  of  an  almighty  Saviour  to  deliver  us  frcHi  this 
 dcp  orable  flate,  as  well  as  of  a  divine  revtlation  to  inftruft  us 
 in,   and  direct  us  agreeable  to  the  will  of  God. 
 
 And  thus  the  way.  by  iuch  an  introductory  difcourfe,  is 
 prepared  for  opening  the  gofpcl fcheme  of  falvation  through 
 t.  t  great  Redeemer,  and  for  treating  of  thofe  dofirincs  that 
 irr.n;ediately  relate  to  the  foul's  renovation  by  the  divine  Spi^ 
 rit,  and  preparation  for  a  ftate  of  cverlafting  blefTedacfs. 
 
CHRISTIANIZING  OFTHEINDIANS.  45^ 
 
 In  giving  fuch  a  relation  of  things  to  Pagans,  it  is  not  a 
 jittle  difficult  (as  was  obferved  before)  to  deliver  truths  in 
 their  proper  order,  without  interfering,  and  without  taking 
 for  granted  things  not  as  yet  known  :  to  difcouife  of  them 
 in  a  familiar  manner,  fuited  to  the  capacities  of  Heathen:  to 
 illurtrate  them  by  eafy  and  natural  fuTniitudcs :  to  obviate  or 
 anfwer  the  objeflions  tney  are  diipoled  to  make  againft  the 
 feveral  particulars  of  it,  as  well  Zi>  to  take  notice  of,  and  con- 
 fute their  contrary  notions. 
 
 What  has  fomctimes  been  very  difcouraging  in  my  firft- 
 difcourfes  to  them,  is,  that  when  I  have  diftinguilTied  between 
 the  prefent  znd  future  ftate,  and  fhnvn  the.n,  that  it  was  my 
 bufinefs  to  treat  of  thelc  things  that  concern  the  life  to  come, 
 they  have  fome  of  them  mocked,  looked  upon  thefe  things 
 of  no  importance;  have  fcarce  had  a  curiofity  to  hear,  and 
 perhaps  walked  otf  before  I  had  half  done  my  difcourfe.  And 
 in  fuch  a  cafe  no  impreilions  can  be  made  upon  their  minds 
 to  gain  their  attention.  They  are  not  awed  by  hearing  of 
 the  anger  of  God  engaged  againft  finners,  of  everlaiiing  pu- 
 nifhment  as  the  portion  of  gofpel-neglefters.  They  are  not 
 allured  by  hearing  of  the  blcffednefs  of  thofe  who  embrace 
 and  obey  the  gofpcl.  So  that  to  gain  their  attention  to  my 
 difcourfes,  has  often  been  as  difficult  as  to  give  them  a  juft 
 notion  of  the  defign  of  them,  or  to  open  truths  in  their  proper 
 order. 
 
 Another  difficulty  naturally  falling  under  this  head  I  am  ^ 
 now  upon,  is,  that  "  it  is  next  to  impofTible  to  bring  them  to 
 '*  a  rational  conviffion  that  they  are  finners  by  nature,  and 
 *'  that  their  hearts  are  corrupt  aad  fmful,"  unlefs  one  could 
 charge  them  with  fome  grofs  a6ls  of  immorality,  fuch  as  the 
 light  of  nature  condemns.  If  they  can  be  charged  with  be- 
 haviour contrary  to  the  commands  of  the  fecond  table, — with 
 manifeft  abufes  of  their  neighbour,  they  will  generally  own 
 fuch  a<5lions  to  be  wrong  ;  but  then  they  feem  as  if  they 
 thought  it  was  only  the  actions  that  were  fmful,  and  not  their 
 hearts.  But  if  they  cannot  be  charged  with  fuch  fcandalous 
 aftions,  they  feem  to  have  no  confcioufnefs  of  lin  and  guilt 
 at  all,  as  I  had  occafion  to  obferve  in  my  Journal  of  March 
 24.  So  that  it  is  very  difficult  to  convince  them  :  ationally 
 of  that  which  is  readily  acknov/ledged  (though,  alas !  rarely 
 felt)  in  the  Chriftian  world,  viz.  "  That  we  are  all  iinners." 
 
 The  method  I  take  to  convince  them  "  we  are  finners  by 
 "  nature,"  is,  to  lead  them  to  an  obfervation  of  their  little 
 ehildren,  how  they  will  appear  in  a  rage,  fight  and  firike 
 their  mothers,  before  they  are  able  to  fpeak  or  walk,  Mhlle 
 
 T   M  2  thcv 
 
4^0  DrFFICULTIES  ATTENDING  THET 
 
 they  are  fo  young  that  it  is  plain  they  are  incapable  of  learn* 
 ing  fuch  praftices.  And  the  light  of  nature  in  the  Indians 
 condemning  fuch  behaviour  in  children  towards  their  parents, 
 they  muft:  own  thefe  tempers  and  a<Slions  to  be  wrong  and 
 finful.  And  the  children  having  never  learned  thefe  things, 
 they  muft  have  been  in  their  natures,  and  confequently  they 
 muft  be  allowed,  to  be  "  by  nature  the  children  of  wrath.'* 
 The  fame  I  obfcrve  to  them  with  refpeft  to  the  fin  of  lyingf 
 (which  their  children  feem  much  inclined  to).  They  tell  lies 
 without  being  taught  fo  to  do,  from  their  own  natural  incli- 
 nation, as  well  as  againfl:  reltraints,  and  after  corrections  for 
 that  vice,  which  proves  them  fmners  by  nature,  &c. 
 
 And  further,  in  order  to  fliew  them  their  hearts  are  all 
 eo7  ruptcd  and  jinful,  I  obferve  to  them,  that  this  may  be  the 
 cafe,  and  they  n^)t  be  fenfible  of  it  through  the  blindnefs  of 
 their  minds.  That  it  is  no  evidence  they  are  not  finful,  be- 
 caufe  they  do  not  know  and  feel  it.  I  then  mention  all  the 
 vices  I  know  the  Indians  to  be  guilty  of,  and  fo  make  ufe  of 
 thefe  Unfu]  /breams  to  convince  them  the  fountain  is  corrupt. 
 And  this  is  the  end  for  which  I  mention  their  wicked  praftices 
 to  them,  not  becaufe  I  expeft  to  bring  them  to  an  effectual 
 reformation  merely  by  inveighing  againfl  their  immoralities  ; 
 but  hoping  they  may  hereby  be  convinced  of  the  corruption 
 of  their  hearts,  and  awakened  to  a  fenfe  of  the  depravity  and 
 mifery  oi  then  fallen  ftate. 
 
 And  for  the  fame  purpofe,  viz.  "  to  convince  them  they 
 **  are  fmners,"  I  fometimes  open  to  them,  the  great  com- 
 mand of  "  loving  God  with  all  the  heart,  ftrength,  and  mind."' 
 Shew  ihem  the  rcafonablenefs  of  loving  him  who  has  made, 
 preferved,  and  dealt  bountifully  with  us  :  and  then  labour  to 
 fncA  them  their  utter  negleft  in  this  regard,  and  that  they 
 have  been  fo  far  from  loving  God  in  this  manner,  that,  on  the 
 contrary,  he  has  not  been  "  in  all  their  thoughts." 
 
 Thefe,  and  fuch  like,  are  the  means  I  have  made  ufe  of 
 in  order  to  remove  this  difficulty  ;  but  if  it  be  afked  after  all, 
 "  how  it  was  furmounted?"  I  mufl  anfwer,  God  himfelf  was 
 pieafed  to  do  it  with  regard  to  a  number  of  thtfe  Indians,  by 
 tjk.ng  his  work  into  his  own  hand,  and  making  then)  feel  at 
 heart,  t'*at  they  were  both  finful  and  rniferable.  And  in  the 
 day  rf  God's  power,  whatever  was  fpoken  to  them  from 
 God's  word,  ferved  to  convince  them  they  were  finners,  (even 
 the  moft:  melting  invitations  of  the  gofpel),  and  to  fill  them 
 with  f  )licitude  to  obtain  a  deliverance  from  that  deplorable 
 Aate. 
 
 Further,  it  is  extremely  difficult  to  give  them  any  juft  no- 
 tion 
 
CHRISTIANIZING  OP  THE  INDIANS.  4^1 
 
 tion  of  the  undertaking  of  Chriftin  behalf  of  fmners  ;  of  his 
 obeying  and  fufFering  in  their  room  zndjleati,  in  order  to  a- 
 tone  for  their  fins,  and  procure  their  falvation  ;  and  of  their 
 bein-T  juftified  by  his  righteoufnefs  imputed  to  them. — They 
 are  in  general  wholly  unacquainted  with  civil  lavjs  and  pro- 
 ceedings, and  know  of  no  fuch  thing  as  one  pcrfon's  being 
 fubftituted  as  a  furety  in  the  room  of  another,  nor  have  any 
 kind  of  notion  of  civil  judicatures,  of  perfons  being  arraigned, 
 tried,  judged,  condemned,  or  acquitted.  And  hence  it  is 
 very  difficult  to  treat  with  them  upon  any  thing  of  this  na- 
 ture, or  that  bears  any  relation  to  legal  procedures.  And 
 although  they  cannot  but  have  fome  dealings  with  the  white 
 people,  in  order  to  procure  cloathing  and  other  neceflaries  of 
 life,  yet  it  is  fcarce  ever  known  that  any  one  pays  a  penny 
 for  another,  but  each  one  Hands  for  hirafelf.  Yet  this  is  a 
 thing  that  may  be  fuppofed,  though  feldom  pra^lifed  among 
 them,  and  they  may  be  made  to  underftand,  that  if  a  friend 
 ©f  theirs  pays  a  debt  for  them,  it  is  right  that  upon  that  cok- 
 lideration  they  thcmfelves  fhould  be  difcharged. 
 
 And  this  is  the  only  way  I  can  take  in  order  to  give  them  a 
 proper  notion  of  the  undertaking  TinAJatis faction  of  Chriji  in 
 behalf  of  finners.  But  here  naturally  arile  two  queftions. 
 Firfiy  ''  What  need  there  was  of  Chrill's  obeying  and  fuffering 
 *'  for  us ;  why  God  would  not  look  upon  us  to  be  good  crea- 
 "  tures  (to  ule  my  common  phrafe  for  juflification)  on  ac- 
 *'  count  of  our  own  good  deeds?"  In  anfwer  to  which  I  fome- 
 times  obferve,  that  a  child's  being  never  fo  orderly  and  obe- 
 dient to  its  parents  to-day,  does  by  no  means  fatisfy  for  its 
 contrary  behaviour  yeflcrday  ;  and  that  if  it  be  loving  and  o- 
 bcdient  zxfome  times  only,  and  at  other  times  crofs  and  dif- 
 obedient,  it  never  can  be  looked  upon  a  good  child  for  its 
 own  doings,  llnce  it  ought  to  have  behaved  in  an  obedient 
 manner  always.  This  iimile  (Irlkes  their  minds  in  an  eafy 
 and  forcible  manner,  and  ferves,  in  a  meafure,  to  illullrate 
 the  point.  For  the  light  of  nature  (as  before  hinted)  teaches 
 them,  that  their  children  ought  to  be  obedient  td  them,  and 
 that  at  all  times  ;  and  fome  of  them  are  very  feverc  with  them 
 for  the  contrary  behaviour.  This  I  apply  in  the  .plained 
 manner  to  our  behaviour  towards  God  ;  and  fo  fhew  them, 
 that  it  is  impoiuble  for  us,  fince  wc  have  finned  againfi:  God, 
 to  be  jufi:itied  before  him  by  our  own  doings,  fince  prefenc 
 and  future  goodncfs,  although  perfe^  and  conjiant^  could  never 
 fatisfy  for  paft  mifconduft. 
 
 hfecond  queftion,  is,  "  If  onr  debt  w\i5   fo  great,  and  if 
 "  v.'c  all  dcfervcd  to  fuffer,  how  one  pcrfcn's   fuffering  was 
 
 ''  failicient 
 
4<)2  DIFFICULTIES  ATTENDING  THE 
 
 "  fufficient  to  anfwer  for  the  whole?"  Here  I  have  no  bettei' 
 way  to  illuftrate  the  infinite  value  of  Chrift's  obedience  and 
 fufferings,  arifing  from  the  dignity  and  excellency  of  his 
 perfon,  than  to  (hew  them  the  fuperior  value  of  gold  to  that 
 of  bafer  metals,  and  that  a  fmall  quantity  of  this  will  difchargc 
 a  greater  debt,  than  a  vaft  quautiiy  of  the  common  copper 
 pence. 
 
 But  after  all,  it  is  extremely  difficult  to  treat  with  them 
 upon  this  great  dodtrine  of  "juftification  by  imputed  righ- 
 "  teouinefs." 
 
 I  fcarce  know  how  to  conclude  this  head,  fo  many  things, 
 occurring  that  might  properly  be  added  here :  but  what  has 
 been  mentioned,  may  ferve  for  a  fpecimen  of  the  difficulty  of 
 conveying  divine  truths  to  the  undei  (landings  of  thefe  Indians, 
 and  of  gaining  their  alTent  to  them  as  fuch. 
 
 Third y,  Their  "  inconvenient  fituations,  favage  manners, 
 *'  and  unnappy  method  of  living,"  have  been  an  unfpeakablc 
 difficulty  and  difcouragement  to  me  in  my  work. 
 
 They  generally  live  in  the  wildernef?,  and  fome  that  I 
 have  vifited,  at  great  diftances  from  the  Englifli  tettlements, 
 which  has  obliged  me  to  travel  much,  and  oftentimes  over 
 hideous  rocks,  mountain.^,  and  fwamps, — frequently  to  lie  out 
 in  the  open  woods, — deprived  me  of  the  common  comfortsof 
 life,  and  greatly  impaired  my  health. 
 
 When  I  have  got  aroong  them  in  the  wildernefs,  I  have  of- 
 ten met  with  great  difficulty  in  my  attempts  to  dilcourfe  to 
 them. Have  fometimes  Ipent  hours  with  them  in  attempt- 
 ing to  anfwer  their  objeftions,  and  remove  their  jealoufies,  be- 
 fore  1   could  prevail  upon  them  to  give  me    a  hearing   upon 
 
 Chriftianity. Have  been  often  obliged  to  preach  in  their 
 
 houfes  in  cold  and  windy  weather,  when  they  have  been  full 
 of  fmoak  and  cinders,  as  well  as  unipeak ably  filthy;  which 
 has  many  times  thrown  me  into  violent  fick  hcad-achs. 
 
 While  I  have  been  preaching,  their  children  have  frequent- 
 ly cried  to  that  degree.  I  ccuid  fcarcely  be  heard,  and  their 
 Pagan  mothers  would  take  no  manner  of  care  to  quiet  them. 
 At  the  fame  time,   perhaps,    fome  have   been  laughing  and 
 
 mocking  at  divine  truths. Others  playing  with  their  dogs, 
 
 — whittleing  flicks,  and  the  like.  And  this,  in  many  of 
 them,  not  from  fpite  and  prejudice,  but  tor  want  of  better 
 manners. 
 
 A  view  of  thefe  things  has  been  not  a  little  finking  and  dif- 
 couraging  to  me  ; — has  fometimes  fo  far  prevailed  upon  m.e  as 
 to  render  me  entirely  difpirittd,  and  wholly  unable  to  go  on 
 with  my  work ;   and  given  me  fuch  a  melancholy  turn  of 
 
 mind^ 
 
CJHRISTIANIZING   OF  THE  INDIANS.  461 
 
 mind,  that  1  have  many  times  thought  I  could  never  more 
 addrefs  an  Indian  up  m  religious  matters. 
 
 The  folitary  manner  in  which  I  have  generally  been  obliged 
 to  live,  on  account  of  their  inconvenient  lituations,  has  been 
 not  a  little  prclling.  1  have  fpent  the  greater  part  of  my  time, 
 for  more  than  three  years  part,  entirely  alone,  as  to  any  a- 
 greeable  fociery  ;  and  a  very  canliderabie  part  of  it  have  lived 
 in  houfes  by  myfelf,  without  having  the  company  of  any  hu- 
 man creature.    And  fometimes  have  Icarcely  fecn  an  Englilh- 
 
 man  for  a  month  or  fix  weeks  together. Have  had  my 
 
 fpirits  (o  deprefled  with  melancholy  views  of  the  tempers  and 
 condu<5l  of  Pagans,  when  I  have  been  for  fome  time  confined 
 with  them,  that  1  have  felt  as  if  banilhed  from  all  the  people 
 of  God. 
 
 1  have  likewife  been  wholly  alone  in  my  work,  there  being 
 no  other  m'Jfionary  among  the  Indians  in  either  of  thefe  pro- 
 vinces. And  other  imn'fiers  neither  knowing  the  peculiar  difw 
 ficulties,  nor  moll  advantageous  methods  of  performing  my 
 work,  have  been  capable  to  aiford  me  little  ailiftance  or  ,tup» 
 port  in  any  refpedl 
 
 A  feeling  of  the  great  difadvantages  of  being  alone  in  this 
 work,  has  difcovered  to  me  the  wildom  and  goodnefs  ot  the 
 great  Head  of  the  church,  in  fending  forth  his  difciples  two 
 and  two,  in  order  to  proclaim  the  iacred  myfteries  of  his  king- 
 dom ;  and  has  made  me  long  for  a  colleague  to  be  a  partner  of 
 my  cares,  hopes,  and  fears,  as  well  as  labours  amongft  the  In- 
 dians ;  and  excited  me  to  ufe  fome  means  in  order  to  procure 
 fuch  an  alliftanr,  although  I  have  not  as  yet  been  fo  happy  as 
 to  meet  with  fuccefs  in  that  refpeft. 
 
 I  have  not  only  met  with  great  difficulty  in  travelling  to, 
 and  for  fome  time  refiding  among  the  Indians  far  remote  in 
 the  wildernefs,  but  alfo  in  living  with  them  in  one  place  and 
 
 another  more  ftatedly. Have  been  obliged  to  remove  my 
 
 refidence   from  place  to  place. Have  procured,    and  after 
 
 fome  poor  fafhion,  furnillied  three   houfes    for  living  among 
 
 ihcm,  in  the  fpace  of  about  three  years  paft. One  at  Kau» 
 
 naumeek,  about  twenty  miles  diftant  from  the  city  of  Alba- 
 ny ;  one  at  the  Forks  of  Delaware  in  Pennfylvania;  and  one 
 at  Crofweekfung  in  New-Jerfey.  And  the  Indians  in  the 
 latter  of  thefe  provinces  (with  whom  1  have  latterly  fpent  moft 
 of  my  time)  being  not  long  fince  removed  from  the  place 
 where  they  lived  the  laft  winter,  (the  reafon  of  which  I  ment 
 tioned  in  my  Journal  of  March  24.  and  May  4.),  I  have  now  no 
 houfe  at  all  of  my  own,  but  am  obliged  to  lodge  with  an  Eng- 
 lifh  family  at  a  confidcrable  diftance  from  them,  to  the  greac 
 
 difadvantage 
 
4«4     DIFFICULTIES  ATTENDING  THE 
 
 difadvantage  of  my  work  among  them,  they  being  like  chll 
 dren  that  continually  need  advice  and  direftion,  as  well  as  in- 
 citement to  theii  worldly  bulinels. 
 
 The  houfes  I  have  formerly  lived  in  are  at  great  diftances 
 from  each  other;  the  two  neareft  of  them  being  more  than 
 feventy  miles  apart,  and  neither  of  them  within  fifteen  miles 
 of  the  place  where  the  Indians  now  live. 
 
 The  Indians  are  a  people  very  poor  and  indigent,  and  fo 
 deftitute  of  the  comforts  of  life,  at  fome  feafons  of  the  year 
 cfpecially,  that  it  is  impoffible  for  a  perfon  who  has  any  pity 
 to  them,  and  concern  for  the  Chriflian  intereft,  to  live  among 
 them  without  confiderablc  expence,  efpecially  in  time  of  lick- 
 uefs.  If  any  thing  be  beftowed  on  one,  (as  in  fome  cafes  it 
 is  peculiarly  neceffary,  in  order  to  remove  their  Pagan  jealou- 
 fies,  and  engage  their  friendfhip  to  Chriftianity),  others,  be 
 there  never  fo  many  of  them,  expefl  the  fame  treatment. 
 And  while  they  retain  their  Pagan  tempers,  they  difcover  little 
 gratitude,  or  even  manhood,    amidft  all  the  kindneffes  they 
 
 receive. If  they  make  any   prefents,    they  expc6l  double 
 
 fatisfadlion.  And  Chriftianity  itfelf  does  not  at  ance  cure 
 them  of  thefe  ungrateful  and  unmanly  tempers. 
 
 They  are  in  general  unfpeakabiy  indolent  and   flothful, — 
 Lave  been  bred  up  in  idlenefs,-^know  little   about  cultivating 
 land,  or -indeed  of  engaging  vigoroufly  in  any  other  bufinefs. — 
 So  that  I  am  obliged  to  inftruft  them  in,  as  well  as  prefs  them 
 to  the  performance  c^f  their  work,  and  take  the  overfight  of 
 all  their  fecular  bufinefs.     They  have  little  or  no  ambition  or 
 refolution.— —  Not  one  in  a  thoufand  of  them   that  has  the 
 fpiiit  of  a  man.     And  it  is  next  to  impoflible  to  make  thera 
 feufible  of  the  duty  and  importance  of  being  aftive,  diligent, 
 and  induftrious  in  the  management  of  their  worldly  bufinefs ; 
 and  to  excite  any  fpirit  and  promptitude   of  that   nature  in 
 them.     When  I  have  laboured  to  the  utmoft  of  my  ability  to 
 iTiew  them  of  what  importance  it  would  be  to  the  Chriftian  in- 
 tereft among  them,    as  well  as  to  their  worldly  comfort,  for 
 them  to  be  laborious  and  prudent  in  their  bufinefs,  and  to  fur- 
 nidi  therafelves  with  the  comforts  of  life;  how  this  would  in- 
 cline the  Pagans   to  come  among  them,   and  fo  put  them  un- 
 der the  means  of  falvation,  how  it  would  encouiage  religious 
 perfons  of  the  white  people  to  help  them,  as  well  as  flop  the" 
 mouths  of  others  that  were  difpofed  to  cavil   againft  them; 
 how  they  might  by  this  means  pay   thofe.  they  owe  their  juft 
 •dues,  and  fo  prevent  trouble   from   coming  upon  themfelves, 
 «ind  reproach  upon  their  Cbiiftiiin  profeffion  :    1  fay,  when  I 
 haxe  endeavoared  to  reprefent  this  matter  in  the  moil  advan- 
 tageous 
 
CHRISTIANIZING  OF  THE  INDIANS.  465 
 
 tagcous  light  I  p'>iribly  could,  they  have  indeed  affented  to  all 
 I  faid,  but  been  little  moved,  and  confequently  have  afted 
 tike  themfelves,  or  at  leaft  too  much  fo.  Though  it  muft  be 
 acknowledged,  that  thofe  who  appear  to  have  a  fenfe  of  di- 
 vine things,  are  confiderably  amended  in  this  refpetft,  and  it 
 is  hopeful,  that  time  will  make  a  yet  greater  alteration  upon 
 them  for  the  better. 
 
 The  c  )ncern  I  have  had  for  the  fettling  of  xhefe  Indians  in 
 New-Jerfcy  in  a  oompaft  form,  in  order  to  their  being  a  Chri- 
 llian  congregation,  in  a  capacity  of  enjoying  the  means  of 
 grace ;  the  care  of  managing  their  woi^ldly  bufinefs  in  order  to 
 this  end,  and  to  their  having  a  comfortable  livelihood,  have 
 been  more  preffing  to  my  mind,  and  cofl  me  more  labour  and 
 fatigue,  for  feveral  months  part,  than  all  my  other  work  a- 
 mong  them. 
 
 Their  "  wandering  to  and  fro  in  order  to  procure  the  ne- 
 "  ceffaries  of  life,"  is  another  difficulty  that  attends  my 
 work.  This  has  often  deprived  me  of  opportunities  to  dif- 
 courfe  to  them  :■  —has  thrown  them  in  the  way  of  tempta- 
 tion, either  among  Pagans  further  remote  where  they  have 
 gone  to  hunt,  who  have  laughed  at  them  for  hearkening  to 
 Chriftianity :  or  among  white  people  more  horribly  wicked, 
 who  have  often  made  them  drunk ;  and  then  got  their  com- 
 modities, fuch  as  fkins,  bafkets,  brooms,  fhovels,  and  the 
 like,  (with  which  they  defigned  to  have  bought  corn,  and  o- 
 ther  neceflaries  of  life,  for  themfelves  and  families),  for,  it 
 may  be,  nothing  but  a  little  ftrong  liquor,  and  then  fent 
 them  home  empty.  So  that  for  the  labour,  perhaps,  of  fe- 
 veral weeks,  they  have  got  nothing  but  the  fatisfaftion  of  be- 
 ing drunk  once ;  and  have  not  only  loft  their  labour,  but 
 (which  is  infinitely  worfe)  the  impreffions  of  divine  things 
 that  were  made  upon  their  minds  before. 
 
 But  I  forbear  enlarging  upon  this  head.  The  few  hints  I 
 have  given  may  be  fufficient  to  give  thinking  perfons  fome  ap- 
 prehenfions  of  the  difficulties  attending  ray  work,  on  account 
 of  the  inconvenient  Jituations  and  favage  manners  of  the 
 Indians,  as  well  as  of  their  unhappy  method  of  living. 
 
 Fourthly,  The  laft  difficulty  I  ffiall  mention,  as  having  at- 
 tended my  work,  is,  "  what  has  proceeded  from  the  attempts 
 "  that  fome  ill-minded  perfons  have  defignedly  m-ade,  to 
 *'  hinder  the  propagation  of  the  gofpel,  and  a  work  of  divine 
 ''  grace  among  the  Indians." 
 
 The  Indians  are  not  only  of  themfelves  prejudifed  againft 
 Chriftianity,  on  the  various  accounts  I  have  already  mention- 
 ed, but;  as  if  this  was  not  enough,  there  are  fome  in  all  parts 
 
a66  difficulties  attending  the 
 
 of  the  country  where  I  have  preached  to  them,  Svho  have 
 taken  pains  induftrioufly  to  bind  them  down  in  Pagan  dark- 
 nefs :  "  ncglefting  to  enter  into  the  kingdom  of  God  them- 
 "  felres,  and  labouring  to  hinder  others." 
 
 After  the  beginning  of  the  religious  concern  among  the  In- 
 dians in  New-Jerfey,  fome  endeavoured  to  prejudife  them  a- 
 gainit  me  and  the  truths  I  taught  them,  by  the  moft  fneaking, 
 unmnnly,  and  falfe  fuggeftions  of  things  that  had  no  manner 
 of  foundation  but  in  their  own  brains.  Some  particulars  of 
 this  kind  I  formerly  took  notice  of  in  one  of  the  remarks 
 made  upon  my  Journal  concluded  the  2oth  of  November  laft. 
 And  might  have  added  yet  more,  and  of  another  nature,  than 
 thofe  there  mentioned,  had  not  modefly  forbidden  me  to 
 mention  what  was  too  obfcene  to  be  thought  of.  But,  through 
 tlie  mercy  of  God,  they  were  never  able,  by  all  their  abomina- 
 ble infinuations,  flouting  jeers,  and  downright  lies,  to  create 
 in  the  Indians  thofe  jealoufies  they  defired  to  polFefs  them 
 with,  and  fo  were  never  fulfered  to  hinder -the  work  of  grace 
 among  them. 
 
 But  when  they  faw  they  could  not  prejudife  the  Indians  a- 
 gainft  me,  nor  hinder  them  from  receiving  the  gofpel,  they 
 then  noifed  it  through  the  country,  that  I  was  undoubtedly  a 
 Roman  cathol'rc,  and  that  I  was  gathering  together,  and  train- 
 ing up  the  Indians  in  order  to  feive  a  Popiih  interefl;  that  I 
 fliould  quickly  head  them,  and  cut  people's  throats. 
 
 What  they  pretended  gave  them  reafon  for  this  opinion, 
 was,  that  they  underftood  I  had  a  commiffion  from  Scotland. 
 Whereupon  they  could  with  great  aflurance  fay,  "  All  Scot- 
 **  land  is  turned  to  the  Pretender,  and  this  is  but  a  Popiih 
 "  plot  to  make  a  party  for  him  here,"  ^c.  And  fome  (I  am 
 informed)  a<flually  went  to  the  civil  authority  with  complaints 
 againft  me,  but  only  laboured  under  this  unhappinefs,  that 
 •when  they  came,  they  had  nothing  to  complain  of,  and  could 
 give  no  colour  of  reafon  why  they  attempted  any  fuch  thing, 
 or  defired  the  civil  authority  to  take  cognizance  of  me, 
 having  not  a  word  to  alledge  againft  my  preaching  or  pra^icf, 
 only  they  furmifed  that  becaufe  the  Indians  appeared  fo  very 
 loving  and  orderly,  they  had  a  defign  of  impofing  upon  people 
 by  that  means,  and  fo  of  getting  a  better  advantage  to  cut 
 their  throats.  And  what  temper  they  would  have  had  the  In- 
 dians appear  with  in  order  to  have  given  no  occafion,  nor  have 
 left  any  room  for  fuch  a  fufpicion,  "  I  cannot  tell."  I  pre- 
 fumc  if  they  had  appeared  with  the  contrary  temper,  it  would 
 quickly  have  bcea  obferved  of  them,  that  "  they   were  now 
 
 *'  grow« 
 
CHRISTIANIZING  OF  THE  INDIANS.  467 
 
 *'  grown  furly,"  and  in   all  probability  were  preparing  to 
 "  cut  people's  throats." 
 
 From  a  view  of  thefe  things,  I  have  had  occafion  to  admire 
 the  wifdom  and  goodnefs  of  God  in  providing  io  full  and  au- 
 thaitic  a  comrniffion  for  the  undertaking  and  carrying  on  of 
 this  work,  without  which  (notwithflanding  the  charitabknefs 
 of  the  defign)  it  had  probably  met  with  moleflation. 
 
 The  Indians  who  have  been  my  hearers  in  New-Jcrfey, 
 have  likewife  been  fued  for  debt,  and  threatened  with  im- 
 prifonment  more  fmce  I  came  among  them  (as  they  inform 
 rne)  than  in /t7;d^«  years  before.  The  reafon  of  this,  I  fup- 
 pofe,  was,  they  left  frequenting  thofe  tippling  houfes  where 
 they  ufed  to  confume  molt  of  what  they  gained  by  hunting 
 and  other  means.  And  thefe  per  Tons  feeing  that  "  the  hope 
 "  of  future  gain  was  lofl,"  were  refolved  to  make  fure  of 
 what  they  could.  And  perhaps  fome  of  them  put  the  In- 
 dians to  trouble,  purely  out  of  fpite  at  their  embracing  Chri-  , 
 ilianity. 
 
 This  conduft  of  theirs  has  been  very  difireffing  to  me ;  for 
 I  was  fenfible,  that  if  they  did  imprifon  any  one  that  embra- 
 ced, or  hearkened  to  Chriftianity,  the  news  of  it  would  quickly 
 fpread  among  the  Pagans  hundreds  of  miles  diftant,  who 
 would  immediately  conclude  I  had  involved  them  in  this 
 difficulty,  and  thence  be  filled  with  prejudice  againft  Chrifti- 
 anity, and  ftrengthened  in  their  jealoufy  that  the  whole  of 
 my  defign  among  them,  was  to  enfnare  and  enflave  thera. 
 And  I  knew  that  fome  of  the  Indians  upon  Sufquahannah 
 had  made  this  obje^lion  againft  hearing  me  preach,  viz.  That 
 they  underftood  a  number  of  Indians  in  Maryland,  fome 
 hundred  of  miles  didant,  who  had  been  uncommonly  free 
 with  the  Englilh,  were  after  a  while  put  ia  jail,  fold,  dc. 
 "Whence  they  concluded,  it  v/as  beft  for  them  to  keep  at  a 
 diftance,  and  have  nothing  to  do  with  Chriftians. 
 
 The  method  I  took  in  order  to  remove  this  difficulty,  was, 
 to  prefs  the  Indians  with  all  pofTible  fpeed  to  pay  their  debts, 
 and  to  exhort  thofe  of  them  that  had  /'ans  or  money,  and 
 were  themfelves  in  a  good  meafure  free  ot  debt,  to  help  others 
 that  were  opprefTed.  And  frequently  upon  fuch  occcfions  I 
 have  paid  money  out  of  my  own  pocket,  which  I  have  not  as 
 yet  received  again. 
 
 Thefe  arc  fome  of  the  difficulties  I  have  met  with  from  the 
 conduft  of  thofe  who,  notvv^ithllanding  their  atlions  fo  much 
 tend  to  hinder  the  propagation  of  Chriftianity,  would  (I  fup- 
 pofe)  be  loth  to  be  reputed  Pagans. 
 
 3  N  2  Thus 
 
46S     DIFFICULTIES  ATTENDING,  6^. 
 
 Thus  I  have  endeavoured  to  anfwer  the  demands  of  the 
 Honourable  Society  in  relation  to  each  of  the  particulars  men- 
 tioned in  their  letter. 
 
 ]f  what  1  have  written  may  be  in  any  meafure  agreeable 
 and  fatisfadlory  to  them,  and  ferve  to  excite  in  them,  or  any 
 of  God's  people,  a  fpirit  of  prayer  and  fuppl'tcation  for  the 
 furtherance  of  a  work  of  grace  among  the  Indians  here,  and 
 the  propagation  of  it  to  their  dijiant  tribes,  I  (hall  have  a- 
 bundant  reafon  to  rejoice  and  blefs  God  in  this,  as  well  as 
 other  refpedls. 
 
 June  20.  DAVID     BRAINERD. 
 
 1746, 
 
 P.  S.  Since  the  conclufion  of  the  preceding  Journal,  (whick 
 was  defigned  to  reprefent  the  operations  of  one  year  only, 
 from  the  firft:  time  of  my  preaching  to  the  Indians  in  New- 
 Jerfey),  I  adminiftered  they^c;v7mew/ of  the  Lord's /upper  a 
 fecond  time  in  my  congregation,  viz.  on  the  13th  ot  July. 
 At  which  feafon,  there  were  more  than  thirty  communicants 
 of  the  Indians,  although  divers  were  abfent  who  fhould  have 
 communicated:  fo  confiderably  has  God  enlarged  cur  number 
 lince  the  former  folemnity  of  this  kind,  defcribcd  fomewhan 
 particularly  in  my  Journal.  This  appeared  to  be  a  feafon  of 
 <livine  power  and  grace,  not  unlike  the  former ;  a  feafon  of 
 refrefhing  to  God's  people  in  general,  and  of  awakening  to 
 fome  others,  although  the  divine  influence  nianifeftly  attend- 
 ing the  feveral  fervices  of  the  folcmnit)',  fcemed  not  fo  great 
 iand  powerful  as  at  the  former  feafon. 
 
 D.  BRAINERD. 
 
 The 
 
drhe  Atteftation  of  the  Reverend  Mr  William  Tztf- 
 NENT  of  Freehold. 
 
 SINCE  my  dear  and  Reverend  brother  Brainerd  has  at 
 length  confented  to  the  publication  of  his  Journal,  I  glad- 
 ly embrace  this  opportunity  o.f  teftifying,  that  our  altogether 
 glorious  Loid  and  Saviour  Jefus  Chrift  has  given  luch  a  dlf- 
 play  of  his  almighty  power  and  fovereign  grace,  not  only  in 
 the  external  reformation,  but  (in  a  judgment  of  charity)  the 
 faving  converfion  of  a  confiderable  number  of  Indians,  that 
 it  is  really  wonderful  to  all  beholders!  though  fome,  alas!  not- 
 withftanding  fufficient  grounds  of  conviction  to  the  contrary, 
 do  join  with  the  devil,  that  avowed  enemy  of  God  and  man, 
 in  endeavouring  to  prevent  this  glorious  work,  by  fuch  ways 
 and  means  as  are  mentioned  in  the  aforelaid  Journal,  to  which 
 I  muft  refer  the  reader  for  a  faithful,  though  very  brief,  ac- 
 count of  the  time  when,  the  place  where,  the  means  by 
 which,  and  manner  how,  this  wifhed  for  work  has  been  begun 
 and  carried  on,  by  the  great  Head  of  the  church. — And  this 
 I  can  more  confidently  do,  not  only  bccaufe  I  am  intimately 
 acquainted  with  the  author  of  the  Journal,  but  on  account 
 of  my  own  perfonal  knowledge  of  the  matters  of  facl  record- 
 ed in  it  refpefting  the  work  itfelf. As  I  live  not  far   from 
 
 the  Indians,  I  have  been  much  converfant  with  them,  both  at 
 their  own  place,  and  in  my  own  parilh,  (where  they  general- 
 ly convene  for  public  v/orfliip  in  Mr  Brainerd's  abfence) ;  and 
 I  think  it  my  duty  to  acknowledge,  that  their  converfation 
 hath  often,  under  God,  refreshed  my  foul. 
 
 To  conclude ;  it  is  my  opinion,  that  the  change  wrought  in 
 xho^tfavages,  namely,  from  the  darknefs  of  Paganifm,  to 
 the  knowledge  of  the  pure  gofpel  of  Chrift ;  from  facrificing 
 to  devils,  to  "prefent  themfelves,  body  and  foul,  a  living  fa- 
 "  crifice  to  God,"  and  that  not  only  from  the  perfuafion  of 
 their  minifter,  but  from  a  clear  heart-affefting  fenfe  of  its  be- 
 ing their  reajonable  ftrvice  :  this  change,  I  fay,  is  fo  great, 
 that  none  could  efFeft  it  but  he  ''who  worketh  all  things  after 
 "  the  good  plealure  of  his  own  will.''  And  I  would  humbly 
 hope,  that  this  is  only  the  firfl-fruits  of  a  much  greater  har- 
 ve{t  to  be  brought  in  from  among  the  Indians,  by  Him  who 
 has  promifed  to  give  his  Son  "  the  Heathen  for  his  inheritance, 
 "■  and  the  uttermoft  ends  of  the  earth  for  his  poifeflion  :" — 
 and  hath  alfo  declared,  "  That  the  whole  earth  fhall  be  filled 
 :^*  \y\ih  the  knov/ledge  of  the  Lord,  as  the  waters  cover  the 
 
 "  fea. 
 
47»  ATTESTATION. 
 
 ''  fca.— Even  fo,   Lord  Jefus  come  quickly.     Amen  snd  A- 
 *'  men." 
 
 7^»/,  courteous  reader^ 
 
 TreehoU,  Auguji  i6.  '^y^'"^''  ivdl-vjr/hcr, 
 
 1746.  William  TenxNENT. 
 
 The  Atteftation  of  the  Reverend  Mr  Macnight  cf 
 Crofwicks. 
 
 AS  it  mufl  needs  afford  a  facred  pleafure  to  fuch  as  cordial- 
 ly defire  the  profperity  and  advancement  of  the  Redeem- 
 er's kingdom  and  intereft  in  the  world,  to  hear  that  our  mer- 
 ciful and  gracious  God  is  in  very  deed  fulfilling  fuch  precious 
 promifes  as  relate  to  the  poor  Heathen,  by  fending  his  ever- 
 lafting  gofpel  among  them,  which,  with  the  concurrence  of 
 his  holy  Spirit,  is  removing  that  worie  than  Egyptian  dark- 
 nefs,  whereby  the  god  of  this  Vi^orld  has  long  held  them  in 
 willing  Jlibjeftion  ;  fo  this  narrative  will  perhaps  be  more  ac- 
 ceptiible  to  the  world,  when  it  is  confirmed  by  the  teftimony 
 of  fuch  as  Were  either  eye-witneffes  of  this  glorious  dawn  cf 
 gofpel-light  among  the  benighted  Psgans,  or  perfonaliy  ac- 
 quainted with  thofe  of  them,  in  whom  (in  a  judgment  of  cha- 
 rity) a  gracious  change  has  been  VvTought.  Therefore  I  the 
 more  willingly  join  with  mj'  brethren  Mr  William  Tenneat 
 land  Mr  Brainerd,  in  affixing  my  atteftation  to  the  foregoing 
 narrative,  and  look  upon  myfelf  as  concerned  in  point  of  duty 
 both  to  God  and  his  people  to  do  fo,  by  reafon  that  I  live  con- 
 tiguous to  their  fettlement,  and  have  had  frequent  opportuni- 
 ties of  being  prefent  at  their  religious  meetings,  where  I  have, 
 with  pleafing  wonder,  beheld,  what  I  am  flrongly  inclined  to 
 believe  were  the  effects  of  God's  almighty  power  accompany- 
 ing his  own  truths;  more  efpecially  on  the  8th  day  of  Auguft 
 1745.  ^'^  which,  while  the  word  of  God  was  preached  by 
 Jvlr  Brainerd,  there  appeared  an  uncommon  folemnity  among 
 the  Indians  in  general :  but  I  am  wholly  unable  to  give  a  full 
 reprefentation  of  the  furprifmg  effects  of  God's  almighty 
 power  that  appeared  among  them  when  public  fervice  was  o- 
 ver;  while  Mr  Brainerd  urged  upon  feme  of  them  the  abio- 
 lute  neceffity  of  a  fpeedy  clofure  %vith  Chrifl,  the  holy  Spirit 
 seemed  to  be  poured  cut  upon  them  in  a  plenteous  meaforc, 
 iniomuch  as  the  Indians  prefent  in  the  \vicivs77i  feemed  to  be 
 brought  to  the  jailor's  cafe,  Acls  xvi.  30.   utterly  unable  to 
 
 conceal 
 
ATTESTATION.  471 
 
 conceal  the  diftrefs  and  perplexity  of  their  fouls ;  this  prompt- 
 ed the  pious  among  them  to  bring  the  difperfed  congregation 
 together,  who  foon  feemed  to  be  in  the  greatefl  extremity^ 
 fjnie  earneftly  begging  for  mercy,  under  a  foiemn  fenfe  of 
 their  periiTiing  condition,  (in  their  language),  while  others 
 wcie  unable  to  arife  from  the  earth,  to  the  great  wonder  of 
 thofe  white  people  that  were  prefent,  (one  of  whom  is  by  this 
 means,  I  truft,  favingly  brought  to  Chrift  fmce) ;  nay,  fo  ve- 
 ry ftrange  was  the  concern  that  appeared  among  thefe  poor 
 Indians  in  general,  that  I  am  ready  to  conclude,  it  might 
 have  been  fufficient  to  have  convinced  an  Atheifl,  that  the 
 Lord  was  indeed  in  the  place.  I  am,  ibr  my  part,  fully  per- 
 fuaded,  that  this  glorious  v/ork  is  true  and  genuine,  whilftwirii 
 fatisfaclion  I  behold  feveral  of  thefe  Indians  difcovering  all 
 the  fymptoms  o^  imvard  holinefs  in  their  lives   and  converfa- 
 
 tion. 1  have  had  the   fatisfuftion  of  joining  with  them  ii> 
 
 their  fervice  on  the  nth  of  Auguft  1746,  which  was  a  day 
 fet  apart  for  imploring  the  divine  bleffing  on  the  labours  of 
 their  minifter  among  other  tribes  of  Indians  at  Sufquahannah, 
 in  all  which  they  condufted  themfelves  with  a  very  decent  and 
 becoming  gravity  ;  and,  as  far  as  I  am  capable  of  judging, 
 they  maybe  propofed  as  examples  of  piety  and  godlinefs  to  all 
 the  white  people  around  them,  which  indeed  is  juflly  "mar- 
 *'  vellous  in  our  eyes,"  efpecially  confidering  what  they  lately 
 have  been. 
 
 O  may  the  glorious  God  fliortly  bring  about  that  deiirable 
 time,  when  our  exalted  Immanuel  fhali  have  "the  Heathen 
 **  given  for  his  inheritance,  and  the  uttermoft  parts  of  the 
 *^  earth  for  his  pofTeflion !" 
 
 Charles  Macnight. 
 Auguft  29.  1746. 
 
 Atteflation  of  the  elders  and  deacans  of  the  Presbyte- 
 rian church  in  Freehold. 
 
 WE  whofe  names  are  underwritten,  being  elders  and  dea- 
 cons of  the  Prclbyterian  church  in  Freehold,  do  here- 
 by teftify,  that,  in  our  humble  opinion,  God,  even  our  Sa- 
 viour, has  brought  a  confiderable  number  of  the  Indians  in 
 thefe  parts,  to  a  faving  union  with  himfclf. 
 
 This   we  are   perfuaded  of  from  a  perfonal  acquaintance 
 with  them,  whom  we  not  only  hear  fpcsk   ^f  the  great  doc- 
 trines 
 
472 
 
 ATTESTATION. 
 
 trines  of  the  gofpet  with  humility,  affe£lion,  and  undcrflani- 
 ing,  but  we  fee  them  walk  (as  far  as  man  can  judge)  foberly, 
 righteoully,  and  godly.  We  have  joined  with  them  at  the 
 Lord's  fupper,  and  do  from  our  hearts  efteem  them  our  bre- 
 thren in  Jefus.  For  "thefe  who  were  not  God's  people,  may 
 "  now  be  called  the  children  of  the  living  God :  it  is  the 
 "  Lord's  doing,  and  it  is  marvellous  in  our  eyes.''  O  that  he 
 may  go  on  "conquering  and  to  conquer,"  until  he  has  fubdued 
 all  things  to  himfelf  J  This  is,  and  (hall  be  the  unfeigned  de- 
 fires  and  prayers  of. 
 
 Walter  Ker, 
 Robert  Cummins, 
 David  Rhe, 
 John  Henderfon, 
 John  Anderfon, 
 Jofeph  Ker, 
 
 1 
 
 William  Ker, 
 Samuel  Ker, 
 Samuel  Craig, 
 
 Deacons. 
 
 }>.  Elders. 
 
 Freehold,  Augufi  i6. 
 1746. 
 
 F    I    N    I    S: 
 
Sermon 
 
 PREACHED 
 
 In   New- Ark,    June  12.   1744. 
 
 AT    THE 
 
 ORDINATION 
 
 O     F 
 
 Mr  David  Brainerdj 
 
 A  Miflionary  among  the  Indians 
 
 Upon  the   Borders  of  the  Provinces  of  New- York,    New- 
 Jerfey,  and  Pennfylvania. 
 
 By    E.    P  E  M  B   E  R  T  O  N,    A.    M, 
 
 raftor  of  the  Pre(byterian  Church  in  the  City  of  New- York. 
 W     I     T     H 
 
 An  Appendix,  touching  the  Indian  Affairs. 
 
 EDINBURGH: 
 Printed  in  the  Year  MDGCLXV. 
 
A  N 
 
 Ordination  SERMON. 
 
 Luke  xiv.  23. 
 
 Jini  the  Lordfa'id  unto  the  fervant,  Go  out  into  the  high-ways 
 and  hedges,  and  compel  them  to  come  in,  that  my  houfe  may 
 be  filled. 
 
 GO  D  cre6ted  this  vifible  world  as  a  monument  of  his 
 glory, — a  theatre  for  the  difplay  of  his  adorable  perfec- 
 tioas. — The  heavens  proclaim  his  wifdom  and  power  in  ihi- 
 ning  characters,  and  the  whole  earth  is  full  of  his  goodnefs. 
 Man  was  in  his  original  creation  excellently  fitted  for  the  fer- 
 vice  of  God,  and  for  perfeft  happinefs  in  the  enjoyment  of 
 the  divine  favour. 
 
 But  fin  has  difturbed  the  order  of  nature,  defaced  the  beau- 
 ty of  the  creation,  and  involved  man,  the  lord  of  this  lower 
 world,  in  the  moflr  difconfolate  circumftances  of  guilt  and 
 mifery. 
 
 The  all-feeing  eye  of  God  beheld  our  deplorable  ftate;  in- 
 finite pity  touched  the  heart  of  the  Father  of  mercies;  and 
 infinite  wifdom  laid  the  plan  of  our  recovery.  The  Majefty 
 of  heaven  did  not  fee  meet  to  fuffer  the  enemy  of  mankind, 
 eternally  to  triumph  in  his  fuccefs ;  nor  leave  his  favourite 
 workraanfhip,  irrecoverably  to  perifli  in  the  ruins  of  the  a- 
 poftafy.  By  a  method,  which  at  once  aftoniflies  and  delights 
 the  fublimelt  fpirits  above,  he  opened  a  way  for  the  difplay  of 
 his  mercy,  without  any  violation  of  the  facred  claims  of  his 
 juftice ;  in  which,  the  honour  of  the  law  is  vindicated,  and 
 the  guilty  offender  acquitted ;  fin  is  condemned,  and  the  fin- 
 ner  eternally  faved.  To  accomplidi  this  blefied  defign,  the 
 beloved  Son  of  God  alTumed  the  nature  of  man, — in  our  na- 
 ture died  a  fpotlefs  facrifice  for  fin, — by  the  atoning  virtue 
 of  his  blood  he  "  made  reconciliation  for  iniquity," — and  by 
 his  perfscl  obedience  to  the  law  of  God,  "  brought  in  everlaft- 
 "  ing  righteoufnefs." 
 
 ^02  Havins 
 
47$         A     SERMOM     AT     THE 
 
 Having  finirtied  his  work  upon  earth,  before  he  afccnded  to 
 his  heavenly  Father,  he  commiflioned  the  miniftcrs  of  his 
 kingdom,  to  "preach  the  gofpcl  to  every  creature."  Ho 
 fent  them  forth  to  make  the  moft  extenfive  offers  of  falva- 
 tion  to  rebellious  fmners,  and  by  all  the  methods  of  holy 
 violence  to  "  compel  them  to  come  in,"  and  accept  the  in- 
 vitations of  his  grace. — We  have  a  lively  reprefentationof  this 
 in  the  parable,  in  which  our  text  is  contained. 
 
 The  evident  defign  of  which  is,  under  the  figure  of  a  mar- 
 riage-fupper,  to  fet  forth  the  plentiful  provifion,  which  is 
 made  in  our  Lord  Jefus  Chrift  for  the  reception  of  his  people, 
 and  the  freedom  and  riches  of  divine  grace,  which  invites 
 the  moft  unworthy  and  miferable  finners,  to  partake  of  this 
 facred  entertainment.  The  firft  invited  gucflb  were  the  Jews, 
 the  favourite  people  of  God,  who  were  heirs  of  divine  love, 
 while  the  reft  of  the  world  were  "  aliens  from  the  common- 
 "  wealth  of  Ifrael,  and  ftrangers  from  the  covenants  of 
 *'  promife :"  but  thefe,  through  the  power  of  prevailing  pre- 
 judice, and  the  influence  of  carnal  affections,  obftinately  rc- 
 jefVed  the  invitation,  and  were  therefore  finally  excluded  from 
 thefe  invaluable  ble  flings. 
 
 But  it  was  not  the  defign  of  infinite  wifdom,  that  thefe 
 coftly  preparations  fliould  be  loft,  and  the  table  he  had  fprcad, 
 remain  unfurnifhed  with  guefts.  Therefore  he  fent  forth 
 his  fervant  "  into  the  ftreets  and  lanes  of  the  city,"  and  com- 
 manded him  to  bring  in  "  the  poor,  the  maimed,  the  halt, 
 '*  and  the  blind," — /.  e.  the  moft  neceflitous  and  miferable  of 
 mankind  ; — yea,  to  "  go  out  into  the  high-ways  and  hedges,'* 
 to  the  wretched  and  periftiing  Gentiles,  and  not  only  invite, 
 but  even  "  compel  them  to  come  in,  that  his  houfe  might  be 
 ''  filled." 
 
 The  words  of  the  text  reprefent  to  us, 
 
 I.  The  melancholy  J} ate  of  the  Gentile  world.  They  are  de- 
 fcribed  as  "  in  the  high-ways  and  hedges,"  in  the  moft  pe- 
 rifhing  and  helplefs  condition- 
 
 II.  The  compajfionaie  care,  whieh  the  blefl^ed  Redeemer 
 takes  of  them  in  thefe  their  deplorable  circumftances. 
 He  "  fends  out  his  fervants"  to  them,  to  invite  them  to 
 partake  ©f  the  entertainments  oi  his  houfe. 
 
 III.  The  duty  of  the  minifters  of  the  gofpel,  to  "compel 
 "  them  to  come  in,"  and  accept  of  his  gracious  invita- 
 tion. 
 
 Thefe  I  fliall  confider  in  their  order,  and  then  apply  theni 
 to  the  prefent  occafion. 
 
 I.    I 
 
ORDINATION  OF  Mr  BRAINERD.     477 
 
 I.  I  am  to  confider  the  ynelancholy  /late  of  the  Heathen 
 world,  while  in  the  darknefs  of  nature,  and  deftitute  of  di- 
 vine revelation. — It  is  eafy  to  harangue  upon  the  excellency 
 and  advantage  of  the  light  of  nature.  It  is  agreeable  to  the 
 pride  of  mankind,  to  exalt  the  powers  of  human  reafon,  and 
 pronounce  it  a''rufficient  guide  to  eternal  happinefs.  But  let 
 us  inquire  into  the  records  of  antiquity,  let  us  confult  the 
 experience  of  all  ages  ;  and  "we  fhall  find  that  thofe  who  had 
 no  guide  but  the  light  of  nature,  no  inftru£lor  but  unalTilled 
 reafon,  have  wandered  in  perpetual  uncertainty,  darknel's, 
 and  error.  Or  let  us  take  a  view  of  the  prefent  ftate  of  thofe 
 countries  that  have  not  been  illuminated  by  the  gofpel;  and 
 "wc  ihall  fee,  that  not\vithflanding  the  improvements  of  near 
 fix  thoufand  years,"  they  remain  to  this  day  covered  with  the  • 
 groiTefl  darknefs,  and  abandoned  to  the  molt  immoral  and  vi- 
 cious practices. 
 
 The  beauty  and  good  order,  every  where  difcovered  in  the 
 vifible  frame  of  nature,  evidences  beyond  all  reafonable  dif- 
 pute,  the  exiftence  of  an  infinite  and  almighty  caufe,  who 
 firft  gave  being  to  the  univerle,  and  ftill  preferves  it  by  his 
 powerful  providence.  Says  the  apoftle  to  the  Gentiles,  (Kom. 
 i.  ao.)  "  The  invifible  things  of  God,  from  the  creation  of 
 "  the  world,  are  clearly  feen,  being  underftood  by  the  things 
 ^'  that  are  made,  even  his  eternal  power  and  Godhead."  And 
 yet  many,  even  among  the  philofophers  of  the  Gentile  na- 
 tions, impiouily  denied  the  eternal  Deity,  from  whofe  hands 
 they  received  their  exiftence ;  and  blafphemcd  his  infinite  per- 
 fections, when  furrounded  with  the  cleareft  demonftrations 
 of  his  power  and  goodnefs. — Thofe  who  acknowledged  a 
 Deity,  entertained  the  mod  unworthy  conceptions  of  his 
 nature  and  attributes,  and  worfhipped  the  creature,  in  the 
 place  of  the  Creator,  *'  who  is  God  bleffed  for  ever." — Not 
 only  the  illuftrious  heroes  of  antiquity,  and  the  public  bene- 
 factors of  mankind,  but  even  the  moft  defpicable  beings  in  the 
 order  of  nature,  were  enrolled  in  the  catalogue  of  their  gods, 
 and  became  the  object  of  their  impious  adoration.  "  They 
 "  changed  the  glory  of  the  incorruptible  God,  into  an  image 
 *'  made  like  to  corruptible  man,  to  birds  and  four-footed  beafts, 
 ■"  and  creeping  things,"  Rom.  i.  23. 
 
 A  few  of  the  fublimeft  genius's  of  Rome  and  Athens,  had 
 fome  faint  difcoveries  of  the  fpiritual  nature  of  the  human 
 foul,  and  formed  fome  probable  conjectures,  that  man  was 
 defigned  for  a  future  ftate  of  exiftence.  When  they  confider- 
 ^d  the  extenfive  capacities  of  th£  human  mind,  and  the  deep 
 imprellioas  of  futurity^,  engraven  in  every  breaft,  they  could 
 
 not 
 
478  A     SERMON     AT     THE 
 
 not  but  infer,  that  the  foul  was  immortal,  and  at  death  would 
 be  ti'anflated  to  feme  new  and  unknown  ftate.  When  they 
 faw  the  virtuous  oppreffed  with  various  and  fucceffive  calami- 
 ties, and  the  vilcft  of  men  triumphing  in  proipcrity  and  plea- 
 fure,  they  entertained  diftant  hopes,  that  in  a  future  revo- 
 lution, thefe  feeming  inequalities  would  be  reAified,  thefe  in- 
 confiftencics  removed, — the  righteous  diflinguiihingly  reward- 
 •«d,  and  the  wicked  remarkably  punifhed. —  But  after  all  their 
 inquiries  upon  this  important  fubjefl,  they  attained  no  high- 
 er than  fome  probable  conjeftures,  fome  uncertain  expecta- 
 tions.— And  when  they  came  to  defcribe  the  nature  and  f\- 
 -tuation  of  thefe  invillble  regions  of  happinefs  or  mifery,  they 
 made  the  wildeft  guelfes,  and  run  into  the  moft  abfurd  and 
 vain  imaginations.  The  heaven  they  contrived  for  the  en- 
 tertainment of  the  virtuous,  was  made  up  of  fcnfual  plea- 
 fures,  beneath  the  dignity  of  human  nature,  and  inconliftent 
 with  perfeft  felicity :  the  hell  they  defcribed  for  the  pu- 
 niOament  of  the  vicious,  confifted  in  ridiculous  terrors, 
 unworthy  the  belief  of  a  rational  and  religious  creature. 
 
 Their  pra^lces  were  equally  corrupt  with  their  principles. 
 As  the  moft  extravaj^ant  errors  were  received  among  the  e- 
 itabiiflied  articles  of  their  faith,  fo  the  moft  infamous  vices 
 obtained  in  their  praflice,  and  were  indulged  not  only  with  im- 
 punity, but  authorifed  by  the  fanflion  of  their  laws.  T  hey 
 llupidly  erefted  altars  to  idols  of  wood  and  Hone ;  paid  divine 
 honours  to  thofe,  who  in  their  lives  had  been  the  greateft 
 monfters  of  lufl  and  cruelty ;  yea,  offered  up  their  fons  and 
 daughters  as  facriiices  to  devils.  The  principles  of  honour, 
 che  reftiaints  of  ihame,  the  precepts  of  their  philofophers,  were 
 all  too  weak,  to  keep  their  corruptions  within  any  tolerable 
 bounds.  The  wickednefs  of  their  hearts  broke  through  every 
 inciofure,  and  deluged  thx  earth  with  rapine  and  violence, 
 blood  and  llaughter,  and  all  manner  of  brutifh  and  detellable 
 impurities. — It  is  hardly  pciTible  to  read  the  melancholy  de- 
 fcription  of  the  principles  and  manners  of  the  Heathen  world, 
 given  us  by  St  Paul,  Vvithout  horror  and  furprife.  To  think, 
 that  man  once  the  "  friend  of  God,"  and  "  the  lord  of  this 
 *'  lov.  cr  world,"  Hiould  thus  "■  deny  the  God  that  made  him," 
 rnd  bow  down  to  dumh  idols  ;  fhould  thus  by  luft  and  intem- 
 perance, degrade  himfelf  into  the  chara<fter  of  the  beafiy 
 **  which  hath  no  unJcrdaRding;"  and  by  pride,  malice,  and 
 revenge,  transform  himfelf  into  the  very  image  of  the  dcvHf 
 ''  who  was  a  murderer  from  the  beginning." 
 
 Thf§  was  the  ilate  of  the  Gentile  nations,  when  the  light 
 'ftfthe  gofpcl  appeared,  to  fcatter  the  darknefs  that  overfpread 
 
 the 
 
ORDINATION  OF  Mr  BRAINERD.      47^ 
 
 the  face  of  the  earth.  And  this  has  been  the  cafe,  fo  far  as 
 has  yet  appeared,  of  all  the  nations  ever  fince,  upon  whom 
 the  Sun  of  righteoufnefs  has  not  arofe  with  healing  in  his  wings. 
 Every  new  dilcovcred  country  opens  a  new  fcene  of  aftonilh- 
 fng  ignorance  and  barbarity  ;  and  gives  us  frefh  evidence  of 
 the  univerfal  Arruption  of  human  nature. 
 
 II.  I  proceed  now  to  confider  the  compajjionate  care  and 
 klndnefs  of  our  blefled  Redeemer  towards  mankind,  in  thefe 
 theii  deplorable  circumftances.  fie  "  fends  out  his  fervants," 
 to  invite  them  "  to  come  in,"  and  accept  the  entertainments 
 oi  his  houfe, 
 
 God  might  have  left  his  guilty  creatures,  to  have  eternally 
 fuffered  the  difmal  efFefts  of  their  apoftafy,  without  the  leafl 
 Imputation  of  injuftice,  or  violence  of  bis  infinite  perfections. 
 The  fall  was  the  confequence  of  man's  criminal  choice,  and 
 attended  with  the  higheft  aggravations. — The  angels,  that  Jin- 
 fied  were  made  examples  of  God's  righteous  feverity,  and  are 
 refcrved  "  in  chains"  of  guilt,  "  to  the  judgment  of  the  great 
 "  day."  Mercy,  that  tender  attribute  of  the  divine  nature, 
 did  not  interpofe  in  their  behalf,  to  fufpend  the  execution  of 
 their  fentence,  or  avert  God's  threatened  difplcafure :  their 
 punifhment  is  unalterably  decreed,  their  judgment  is  irrever- 
 fible ;  they  are  the  awful  monuments  of  revenging  wrath,  and 
 are  condemned  "  to  blacknefs  of  darknefs  for  ever." — Now 
 juitice  might  have  fliewn  the  fame  inflexible  feverity  to  rebel- 
 lious man,  and  have  left  the  univerfal  progeny  of  Adam,  to 
 perifli  in  their  guilt  and  mifery.  It  was  unmerited  mercy, 
 that  diftinguifhed  the  human  race,  in  providing  a  Saviour  for 
 us  ;  and  the  moft  fignal  compaiTion,  that  revealed  the  counfels 
 of  Heaven  for  our  recovery. 
 
 But  though  juftice  did  not  oblige  the  divine  Being  to  pro- 
 vide for  our  relief,  yet  the  goodnefs  of  the  indulgent  Father 
 of  the  univerfe  inclined  him  to  fhew  pity  to  his  guilty  crea- 
 tures, who  fell  from  their  innocence,  through  the  iubtlety  and 
 malice  of  feducing  anc{  apoft ate  fpirits.  It  was  agreeable  to 
 the  divine  wifdom,  to  difappoint  the  devices  of  Satan,  the  e- 
 nemy  of  God  and  goodnefs,  and  recover  the  creatures  he  had 
 made,  from  their  fubjeftion  to  the  powers  of  darknefs. 
 
 He  therefore  gave  early  difcoveries  of  his  defigns  of  mercy  to 
 our  firft  parents,  and  immediately  upon  the  apoftafy  opened  a 
 door  of  hope  for  their  recovery.  He  revealed  a  Saviour  to 
 the  ancient  Patriarchs,  under  dark  types,  and  by  diflant  pro- 
 mifes ;  made  clearer  declarations  of  his  will,  as  the  appointed 
 time  drew  acar,  for  the  accomplifliraent  ef  the  promifes,  ind 
 
 the 
 
48(3  A     S  B  R  M  O  N     A  T     T  H  E 
 
 the  manifeftation  of  the  Son  of  Gcd  in  human  flefh. — "  And' 
 *'  when  the  fulnefs  of  time  was  come,  God  fent  fbrth  his' 
 *'  Son,  made  of  a  woman,  made  under  the  law,  to  redeem 
 "  them  that  were  under  the  law,  that  we  might  receive  the 
 *'  adoption  of  fons." 
 
 This  divine  and  illuftrious  perfon  left  the  boTom  of  his  Fa- 
 ther, that  he  might  put  on  the  chara6ler  of  a  fervant; — dc- 
 fcended  from  the  glories  of  heaven,  that  he  might  dwell  on 
 this  inferior  earth ; — was  made  under  the  law,  that  he  might 
 fulfil  all  righteoufnefs ; — fubmitted  to  the  infirmities  of  human 
 nature,  to  the  forrows  and  fufferings  of  an  afflifted  life,  and 
 to  the  agonies  of  a  painful  ignominious  death  on  a  crois,  that 
 he  might  deftroy  the  power  of  fin,  abolifh  the  empire  of 
 death,  and  purchafe  immortality  and  glory  for  perifliing 
 man. 
 
 While  our  Lord  Jefas  refided  in  this  lower  world,  he  preach- 
 ed the  glad  tidings  of  falvation,  and  publifhed  the  kingdom  of 
 God ;  confirming  his  doftrine  by  numerous  and  undoubted 
 miracles,  and  recommending  his  inftrudlions  by  the  charms 
 of  a  fpoticfs  life  and  converfation.  He  fent  forth  his  apofVles 
 to  purfue  the  fame  gracious  defigri  of  gofpellizing  the  people, 
 and  furnifhed  them  with  fufficient  powers  to  profelyte  the 
 nations  to  the  faith.  He  alio  appointed  a  ftanding  miniftry, 
 to  carry  on  a  treaty  of  peace  with  rebellious  finners,  in  the 
 fucceffive  ages  of  the  church;  to  continue,  till  the  number  of 
 the  redeemed  is  completed,  and  the  whole  election  of  grace 
 placed  in  circumftances  of  fpotlefs  purity  and  perfect  hap- 
 pinefs. 
 
 Thefe  minifters  are  ftiled  "  the  fervants  of  Chrift,"  by 
 "way  of  eminence  :  they  are  in  a  peculiar  manner  devoted  to 
 the  fervice  of  their  divine  Mafler;  from  hirn  they  receive 
 their  commiffion ;  by  him  they  are  appointed  to  reprefent 
 his  perfon,  prefide  in  his  worlliip,  and  teach  the  laws  of  his 
 kingdom. — To  alfume  this  charafter  without  being  divinely 
 called,  and  regularly  introduced  into  this  facred  office,  is  a 
 bold  invafion  of  Chrift's  royal  authority,  and  an  open  violation 
 
 of  that   order,  which  he  has   eftabliflied  in  his  church. 
 
 Thefe  not  only  derive  their  milTion  from  Chrift,  but  it  is  his 
 uoilrine  they  are  to  preach,  and  not  the  inventions  of  their 
 own  brain  : — it  is  his  glory  they  are  to  promote,  and  not 
 their  own  intereft  or  honour : — their  bufinefs  is  not  to  pro- 
 pagate tTie  defigns  of  a  party,  but  the  common  falvation,  and 
 to  "  befeech  all,  in  Chrift's  name,  to  be  reconciled  unto 
 "  God." 
 
 The 
 
ORDINATION  OF  Mr  BRAINERD.      481 
 
 The  apoftles,' the  primitive  heralds  of  the  evcrlafting  gcv 
 fpel,  were  Tent  to  make  the  firfl:  tender  of  falvation  to  "  the 
 '*  loft  fheep  of  the  houfcof  Ifrael;"  they  were  commanded  to 
 begin  at  Jerufalem,  the  centre  of  the  Jewilh  commonwealth  : 
 but  when  the  Jews  obftinately  perfifted  in  their  impenitence 
 and  unbelief,  they  were  commiflioned  "  to  preach  the  go  fpel 
 *'  to  every  creature  under  heaven  :" — the  finnersof  the  Gentiles 
 were  invited  to  corne  in,  and  accept  of  the  offers  of  falvation. 
 
 The  prophets  pointed  out  a  Meffiah  that  was  to  come,  and 
 proclaimed  the  joyful  approach  of  a  Redeemer,  at  the  time 
 appointed  in  the  fovereign  counfels  of  Heaven.  The  minifters 
 of  thegofpel  now  are  fent  to  declare,  that  the  prophecies  are 
 accomplifhed,  the  promife  fulfilled,  juftice  fatisfied,  falvation 
 purchafed ;  and  all  that  will  come  in,  fnall  receive  the  blefP 
 ings  of  the  gofpel.  They  are  not  only  freely  to  invite  fin- 
 ners,  of  all  orders  and  degrees,  of  all  ages  and  nations;  but 
 to  aflure  them,  that  "all  things  are  now  ready,"  and  to  ufe 
 the  moft  powerful   and  perfualive   methods,  that   they  may 
 
 engage  them  to  comply  with   the  heavenly  call. Which 
 
 brings  me  to  the  third  thing  propofed. 
 
 III.  I  am  next  to  fhcw,  that  it  is  the  great  duty  of  the  mi* 
 nifters  of  the  gofpel  "  to  compel  llnners  to  come  in,"  and  ac- 
 cept of  the  bleiTmgs  of  the  gofpel. This  is  fo  plainly  con- 
 tained in  my  text,  that  I  Hiall  not  multiply  arguments  to  con- 
 firm it.  My  only  bufinefs  ftiall  be  to  explain  the  nature  of 
 this   compulfion,  or   fhew  in  what  manner  fmrters  are  to  be 
 
 "  compelled  to  come  in"  to  the  Chriftian  church.— And 
 
 Fure  I  am,  I  muft  anfwer,  negatively,  not  by  the  deceitful 
 methods  of  fraud  and  difguife, —  nor  the  inhuman  praftices  of 
 perfecution  and  violence.  This  text  indeed  has  often  been 
 alledged  by  the  ferfecuting  bigots  of  all  ages,  and  applied  to 
 fupport  the  caufe  oi  religious  tyranny  ;  to  the  infinite  fcandal 
 of  the  Chriltian  name,  and  the  unlpcakable  detriment  of  the 
 Chriftian  intereft. — By  this  means  the  enemies  of  our  moft 
 holy  faith  have  been  ftrengthened  in  their  infidelity,  the  weak 
 have  been  turned  afide  from  "  the  truth,  as  it  is  in  Jefus," 
 and  the  peaceable  kingdom  of  the  MeiTiah  transformed  into  a 
 field  of  blood,-— a  fcene  of  belli fli  and  horrid  cruelties.  If 
 this  were  the  compuljion  recommended  in  the  gofpel,  then  ab- 
 folute  unrelenting  tyrants  would  be  the  proper  and  jnoft  in- 
 fallible teachers ;  then  racks  and  tortures  would  be  the  genuine 
 and  moft  fuccefsful  method  of  propagating  the  faith.  But 
 furely  every  thing  of  this  kind,  every  violent  and  driving  mea- 
 fure,  is  in  direct  oppofition  to  the  precepts  and  example  of 
 
 ■X  P  our 
 
4«t  A     S  E  R  M  O  N    A  T     T  H  E 
 
 our  blcfled  Saviour,  and  contrary  to  the  very  genius  of  his 
 gofpel, — which  proclaims,  "  Glory  to  God  in  the  higheft, 
 **  on  earth  peace,  good- will  towards  men  *." 
 
 The  princes  of  this  world  exercife  a  temporal  dominion  o- 
 ver  mankind,  and  by  fines  levied  on  their  eftatcs,  and  punifh- 
 ments  in fliifted  upon  their  bodies,  force  men  to  an  outward 
 liibjeftion  to  their  authority  and  government. —  But  the  king- 
 dom of  our  Lord  is  of  a  fpiritual  nature  :  he  erefts  his  empire 
 in  the  hearts  of  men>  and  reigns  over  "a  willing  people  in  the 
 "  day  of  his  power."  External  violence  may  neceilitate  men 
 to  an  external  profellion  of  the  truth,  and  procure  a  difTembled 
 compliance  with  the  inflitutions  of  Chrift;  but  can  never  en- 
 lighten the  darknefs  of  the  mind,  conquer  the  rebellion  of  the 
 will,  nor  fan(fl;ify  and  fave  the  foul,  it  may  transfigure  men 
 into  accompliftied  hypocrites  J  but  will  never  convert  them 
 into  real  faints. 
 
 The  gofpel  was  originally  propagated  by  the  powerful 
 preaching  of  Chrift  and  his  apoftles,  by  the  aftonilhing  mi- 
 racles which  they  wrought  in  confirmation  of  their  do^rine, 
 and  the  exemplary  lives  by  which  they  adorned  their  profeffion 
 and  cbarafter.  Inftead  of  propagating  their  religion  by  the 
 deftruftivc  methods  of  fire  and  fword,  they  fubmitted  to  the 
 rage  and  cruelty  of  a  malignant  world  with  furprifing  patience, 
 and  facrificed  their  very  lives  in  the  caufe  of  God,  without  a- 
 ny  intemperate  difcoverics  of  anger  and  refentment :— inftead 
 of  calling  for  "  fire  from  heaven"  to  deftroy  their  oppofers, 
 they  compaflTii  mated  their  ignorance,  inftrufted  them  with 
 meeknefs,  counfelled  and  exhorted  them  with  "  all  long- 
 "  fuffcring  and  doflrine,"  and  even  fpent  their  dying  breath 
 In  praying  for  their  conviction  and  converfion,  that  they  might 
 be  faved  in  the  day  of  the  Lord  Jefus. 
 
 Now,  in  imitation  of  thefe  primitive  dodors  of  the  Chri-» 
 ftian  church,  thefe  wife  and  fucccfsful  preachers  of  the  gofpel, 
 it  is  the  duty  of  the  minifters  of  the  prefent  day,  to  ufe  the 
 feme  methods  of  compaffion  and  friendly  violence.  A  difin- 
 tereftcd  zeat  for  the  glory  of  God,  a  ftedfaft  adherence  to  the 
 truth,  and  unfhaken  fidelity  in  our  Matter's  caufe,  with  uni- 
 ▼erfal  benevolence  to  mankind,  muft  conftantly  animate  our 
 public  difcourfes,  and  be  confpicuous  in  our  private  convcrfa- 
 tion  and  behaviour. We  muft  diligently  endeavour  to  con- 
 vince the  underftandings,  engage  the  atfeflions,  and  direct  the 
 pra*^ice  of  our  hearers. —  Upon  this  head,  it  may  not  be  amifs 
 to  defcend  to  a  few  particulars. 
 
 ♦  L^ike  iU  141.^ 
 
 I,  Mmlilers 
 
ORDINATION  OF  MrBRAINERD.     4S3 
 
 1.  Miniflers  are  to  "compel  finners  to  come  in,"  by  fetting 
 before  them  their  "  guilty  and  perifhing  condition  by  nature.** 
 
 Sinners  arc  naturally  fund  of  carnal  eafe  and  fecurity  | 
 
 -they  are  delighted  with  their  pleafant  and  profitable  fins ;  they 
 even  '-drink  in  iniquity  like  water/'  with  great  greedincls, 
 with  infatiablc  third,  and  inceffant  gratification,  but  without 
 fear  or  remorfe.  Upon  this  account,  there  is  the  higheft  ne- 
 ceflity  to  found  an  alarm  in  their  ears,  that  they  may  be  a- 
 ■wakened,  to  fee  and  confider  their  dangerous  Hate ;  or  elfe 
 they  will  never  be  excited  to  "  flee  from  the  wrath  to  come." 
 The  fecure  fmner  is  infenfible  of  his  want  of  a  Saviour  :  ''  1  he 
 "  whole  need  not  a  phyfician,  but  they  that  are  fick." 
 
 To  this  end,  the  m.inifters  of  the  gofpel  are  to  fet  "the 
 '*'  terrors  of  the  Lord"  in  array  againil  the  fmner,  and  let  him 
 hear  the  ''^thunder  of  divine  curfes,"  that  utter  their  voice  a- 
 gainft  the  unbelieving.  They  are  to  reprefent  inthe  cleared 
 light,  and  with  the  mod  convincing  evidence,  the  evil  of  lin, 
 and  the  danger  it  expofes  to ;  that  "wrath  from  heaven  is  re- 
 ''  vealed  againft  all  ungodlinefs  and  unrighteoufncfs  of  men*;" 
 that  the  flaming  fword  of  incenfed  jufrice  is  unflieathed,  and 
 the  arm  of  the  Almighty  ready  to  deflroy  fuch  as  are  "  going 
 
 *'  on  flill  in  their  trefpailes,"  impenitent  and  fecure. They 
 
 are  not  only  thus  to  fliew  them  their  danger,  ^ut  to  fet  be- 
 fore them  at  the  fame  time  their  wretched  and  helplefs  cir- 
 curaftances ; — that  there  is  no  human  eye  can  fuccelsfuliy  pi- 
 ty them,  nor  any  created  arm  can  bring  them  cfFeitual  deliver- 
 ance;— that,  while  in  a  ftate  of  unregenerate  nature,  they  are 
 deflitute  of  ftrength  to  perform  any  acceptable  fervice  to  the 
 blefled  God,  and  unable  to  make  any  adequate  fatisfaftion  to 
 his  otfended  juftice  ; — that  indeed  they  can  neither  avoid  the 
 divine  difpleafure,  nor  endure  the  punifliment  that  is  due  to 
 
 their  crimes. Thus  by  a  faithful  application  of  the  law  and 
 
 its  threatenings,  we  fhould  endeavour,  by  God's  bleiling,  to 
 :nakc  way  for  the  reception  of  the  gofpel  and  its  promiles. — 
 This  was  the  wife  method  obferved  by  our  blefled  Saviour, 
 the  firft  preacher  of  the  gofpel;  and  by  the  apoftlcs,  his  infpi- 
 red  fuccefl^^rs.  So  John  the  Baptifl,  v.'hb  ferved  as  "  the 
 "  morning-ftar,"  to  uflier  in  the  appearance  of  the  "  Sun  of 
 "  righteoufnefs,"  did  thus  "prepare  the  way  of  the  Lord," 
 by  enlightening  the  minds  of  men,  in  ihz  knovv'ledge.ot  their 
 guilt  and  mifery,  and  inciting  them  to  flee  from  the  "damna- 
 ""  tion  of  hell." — The  three  thoufand  that  were  converted  to 
 the  faith  at  one  fermon,  in  the  infancy  of  the  Chi  ifcian  church. 
 
 *  F.om.  i.  18. 
 
 3^2  were 
 
484  ASERMONATTHE 
 
 were  firft  awakened  with  a  fenfe  of  their  aggravated  guilt,  in 
 '*  crucifying  the  Lord  of  glory  ;"  and  brought  in  agony  and 
 diftrel's  to  cry  out,  *  "  Men  and  brethren,  what  Ihall  wc 
 *'  do?'' 
 
 This  method,  I  confefs,  is  difagreeable  to  the  fentiments 
 and  inclinations  of  a  fecure  world  ;  and  may  expofe  us  to  the 
 reproach  of  thofc  "  that  arc  at  eafe  in  Zion  :'*  but  is  agreeable 
 to  the  dilates  of  an  enlightened  mind,  conformable  to  the 
 plan  laid  down  in  the  facred  fcriptures,  and  has  in  all  ages  ap». 
 proved  itfelf  the  mofi:  fuccefsful  method  of  promoting  the  in- 
 terefls  of  real  and  vital  religion. 
 
 2.  They  are  to  "compel  finners  to  come  in,"  by  a  lively 
 reprefentation  of  the  power  and  grace  of  our  Almighty  i?c- 
 deenier. — Not  all  the  thunder  and  terror  of  curfcs  from  mount 
 Ebal,  nor  all  the  tremendous  "wrath  revealed  from  heaven  a- 
 "  gainll  the  ungodly,"  not  all  the  anguifh  and  horror  of  a 
 wounded  fpirit  in  an  awakened  finner,  are  able  to  produce 
 an  unfeigned  and  effeflual  compUance  with  the  gofpel-terms 
 of  snercy.  The  miniftry  of  the  laxv  can  only  give  the  know- 
 ledge of  Jin,  roufe  the  finner's  conlcience,  and  alarm  his  fears  ; 
 it  is  the  difpenfation  of  grace,  that  fanflifics  and  faves  the 
 foul.  Nor  is  the  former  needful  but  in  order  to  the  latter. 
 So  much  conviction  as  gives  us  a  fight  of  our  Hn  and  mifery, 
 as  incrmes  us  to  "  flee  from  the  wrath  to  come,"  and  difpofes 
 us  to  fubmit  to  the  gofpel-method  of  falvation  "by  grace 
 ''  through  faith,"  by  fovereign  mercy  through  the  Mediator, 
 fo  much  is  nece/Tary ;  and  more  is  neither  requifite,  nor  ufe- 
 ful,  or  defirable. 
 
 It  is  not  the  office  of  preachers  to  be  perpetually  employed 
 in  the  language  of  terror,  or  exhaufl:  their  llrength  and  zeal 
 in  awakening  and  diflrefTing  fubjects.  No;  but  as  it  is  their 
 dlftinguifliing  charafter,  that  they  are  m'lnijiers  'f  the gofpel, 
 fo  it  is  their  peculiar  bufinefs  to  "  preach  the  unfearchable 
 "  riches  of  Chrift."  The  perfon,  and  offices,  and  love  of  the 
 great  Redeemer,  the  merits  of  his  obedience,  and  purchafes 
 of  his  crofs,  the  victories  of  his  refurreftion,  the  triumphs 
 of  his  afcenfion,  and  prevalence  of  his  intercefTion,  the  power 
 of  his  Spirit,  greatnefs  of  his  falvation,  freenefs  of  his  grace, 
 6c.  •  thefe  are  to  be  the  chofen  and  delightful  fubjeffs  of 
 their  difcourfes. — They  are  to  reprefent  him  as  one — who 
 has  completely  anfwered  the  demands  of  the  law,  rendered 
 the  Deity  propitious  to  the  finner,  and  upon  this  account  is 
 fible  eternally  to  fave  us  from  the  vengeance  of  an  offended 
 
 ♦  Ads  ii.  36.  g7. 
 
 I 
 
ORDINATION  OF  Mr  BRAINERD.    4J5 
 
 God ; — who  is  clothed  with  almighty  power,  to  fubdue  the 
 inveterate  habits  of  fin,  fanftify  our  polluted  nature,  and  re- 
 flore  us  to  fpiritual  health  and  purity; — who  is  Lord  of  the 
 'vifible  and  invijibie  -worlds,  who  knows  how  to  defeat  the 
 mofl:  artful  devices  of  Satan,  and  will  finally  render  his  people 
 victorious  over  their  mod  malicious  and  implacable  adverfa- 
 ries  ; — who  having  "  made  reconciliation  for  iniquity"  upon  the 
 crofs,  is  pleading  the  merits  of  his  blood  in  heaven,  and  power- 
 fully interceding  for  all  fuitable  bleffings  in  behalf  of  his 
 people ; — "  who  is  there  exalted  as  a  Prince  and  a  Saviour  to 
 "  give  repentance  and  remiffion  of  fins  * ;  and  is  able  to  fave 
 ^'  unto  the  utterraofl:  all  thofe  that  come  to  God  in  and 
 ^'  through  himf;"' — in  fine,  who  from  his  illultrious  throne 
 in  glory  ftoops  to  look  down  with  pity  upon  guilty  and  perifti- 
 ing  finners,  ftretches  forth  the  fceptre  of  grace,  and  opens  the 
 everlafting  arras  of  his  mercy  to  receive  them. — Thefe  pecu- 
 liar do(5trines  of  the  gofpel  they  are  frequently  to  teach,  upoa 
 thefe  they  are  to  dwell  with  confiant  pleafure,  that  finners 
 may  be  perfuaded  to  hearken  to  the  inviting  voice  of  divine 
 love,  and  put  their  truft  in  this  almighty  and  compaffionatG 
 Saviour.     In  order  to  which, 
 
 3.  They  are  to  fhew  finners  the  mighty  encouragement, 
 that  the  gofpel  gives  them  to  accept  olChrift,  undjalvation 
 through  his  merits  and  rightcoufnefs. — As  for  ignorant  pre- 
 fumers,  thefe  hear  the  glad  tidings  of  the  gofpel  with  a  fatal 
 inditFerence  ;  and  fay  in  their  hearts,  "  they  fiiall  have  peace," 
 though  they  go  on  in  their  evil  way,  ftupidly  "  negledling  (o 
 -**  great  falvation,"  and  regardlefs  of  eternal  things.  But  a- 
 wakened  minds  are  rather  apt  to  draw  the  darkeft  conclufions 
 with  refpeft  to  their  cafe,  and  to  judge  themfelvcs  excluded 
 
 from  the  invitations  of  the  gofpel. Sometimes  they  ima" 
 
 gine,  that  the  number  and  aggravations  of  their  Jins  exceed 
 the  defigns  of  pardoning  mercy: — at  other  times,  that  they 
 have  fo  long  refilled  the  heavenly  call,  that  now  the  gate  of 
 heaven  is  irrecoverably  barred  againll  them : — and  Satan  fur- 
 ther fuggefts,  that  it  would  be  the  height  of  prefitmption  ia 
 them  to  lay  claim  to  the   bleffings  of  the  gofpel,  till  better 
 
 prepared  for   the   divine  reception. Upon  fuch  imagina- 
 
 ^  ry  and  falfe  grounds  as  thefe,  multitudes  of  the  mvited  guefis 
 make  excufes,  and  exclude  themfelves  from  the  "  marriage- 
 "  fupper  of  the  Lamb."  It  is  therefore  the  bufinefs  of  the 
 fervapts  of  Chrift  to  fhew,  that  "  there  is  yet  room,"  even  for 
 the  greatcft  and  vilcfl  finners  to  come  in,  and  partake  of  the 
 gofpel-feftival ;  that  "  all  things  are  now  ready,"  for  their  wcU 
 
 f  A)5t$  V.  31.         t  Hcb.  YJi.  2 J, 
 
 eome 
 
486  A     SERMON     AT     THE 
 
 come  entertainment ; — that  the  door  is  ftill  open,  and  there  is 
 free  accefs,  not  only  for  thofe  who  have  cfcaped  the  groirer 
 poUutions  of  the  world,  but  even  "  for  the  chief  of  linners,** 
 whofe  guilt  is  of  a  crimfon  colour  and  zfcarlct  dye  ;  that  nei- 
 ther the  number  nor  aggravations  of  their  iniquities  will  ex- 
 clude them  a  (hare  in  the  divine  mercy,  if  now  they  fubmit  to 
 the  fceptre  of  grace  ; — that  whatever  their  condition  and  cir- 
 cumftances  may  be,  it  is  of  prefent  obligation  upon  them  to 
 accept  the  gofpeUcall,  and  their  inftant  duty  to  come  in; 
 the  Mafter  invites  them  "  to  come  to  him,  that  they  may 
 '*  have  life  :"  and  "  whofoever  do  fo,"  the  Mafter  of  the  houle 
 has  alTured  them,  that  "  he  will  in  no  wife  caft  them  out  *.'' 
 
 4.  They  are  to  exhibit  the  unfpeakable  advantages,  that 
 will  attend^  compliance  with  the  gofpel-call. 1  know  in- 
 deed, the  religion  of  Jefus  is  by  its  enemies  often  reprefented 
 in  the  moft  frightful  and  hideous  colours, — particularly  as  lay- 
 ing an  unreafonable  reftraint  on  the  liberties  of  mankind,  and 
 finking  them  into  melancholy  enthufiafts.  It  becomes  us 
 therefore,  who  are  "  fet  for  the  defence  of  the  gofpel,"  to 
 «ndeavour  the  .removing  this  groundlefs  prejudice,  and  to 
 convince  mankind  by  the  light  of  reafon  and  fcripture,  that 
 "'  the  ways  of  wifdom  are  ways  of  pleafantnefs,  and  all  her 
 "  paths  are  peace :''  that  verily  a  lite  of  faith  in  the  blefled 
 Kedeemer  is  the  way  to  be  happy,  both  here  and  hereafter. 
 
 O  what  more  honourable,  than  to  be  "  a  child  of  God, 
 **  an  heir  of  the  kingdom  of  heaven !"  What  more  pleafing, 
 than  to  look  back,  and  behold  our  paft  iniquities  all  buried  in 
 the  depths  of  eternal  oblivion; — than  to  look  forward,  and 
 view  our  dear  Saviour  acknowledging  us  his  friends  and  fa- 
 vourites, and  adjudging  us  to  a  ftate  of  unperifhing  glory? 
 What  more  advantageous,  than  to  have  the  divine  favour  en- 
 gaged for  our  proteflion,  the  promifes  of  divine  grace  for 
 our  confolation,  and  an  afTured  title  to  "  an  inheritance  un- 
 ■^^  defiled,  incorruptible,  and  eternal?"  This  is  the  portion  of 
 the  true  believer.  Thefe  the  privileges,  that  attend  a  com- 
 pliance with  the  gofpel-call. 
 
 Thefe  things  are  to  be  reprefented  in  fuch  a  manner  as  may 
 fend  to  captivate  the  hearts  of  men,  and  engage  them  in  a 
 folicious  care  and  refolution  to  renounce  the  degrading  fervi- 
 £ude  of  fm,  and  refign  themfelves  to  the  power  of  redeeming 
 grace.  Thus  by  the  moft  efFe<n:ual  and  perfuafive  methods, 
 the  minifters  of  Jefus  are  to  compel  fmners  "  to  coijie  in,  that 
 ^'  his  houfe  may  be  filled." 
 
 *  John  vi.  37. 
 
 'It 
 
ORDINATION  OF  Mr  BRAINERD.    487 
 
 It  was  not  in  my  defign,  to  confidef  the  duty  of  the  mini- 
 Mry  in  its  juA  extent;  but  only  to  infift  upon  thofe  things 
 that  more  properly  belong  to  my  fubjeft,  and  lie  direftly  iia 
 the  view  of  ray  text. 
 
 It  will  now  doubtlefs  be  expected,  that  I  apply  my  diG 
 courfe,  more  immediately  to  the  prefent  occajion. 
 
 And  fufFer  me,  dear  Sir,  in  the  firfl:  place,  to  addrefs  my- 
 felf  to  you,  who  are  this  day  coming  under  a  public  confe- 
 cration  to  the  fervice  of  Chrill,  "  to  bear  his  name  among 
 ''  the  Gentiles ;  to  whom  the  Mafter  is  now  fending  you 
 "  forth,  to  compel  them  to  come  in,  that  his  houfe  may  be 
 *'  filled."  We  truft,  you  are  a  chofen  vejjel,  defigned  for 
 cxtenfive  fervice  in  this  honourable,  though  difficult  employ- 
 ment. We  adore  the  God  of  nature,  who  has  furnifhed  you 
 with  fuch  endowments  as  fuit  you  to  this  important 
 charge.  We  adore  the  great  Head  of  the  church  for  the 
 Mobler  gifts  and  graces  of  his  Spirit ;  by  which,  we  truft,  you 
 are  enabled  to  engage  in  this  miffion  with  an  ardent  love  to 
 God,  the  univerfal  Father  of  mankind,  with  a  difmterefted 
 zeal  for  the  honour  of  Chrift,  the  compaffionate  friend  of  fin- 
 ners,  and  with  tender  concern  for  the  perifhing  fouls  of  a 
 '^  people  that  fit  in  darknefs,  and  in  the  fhadow  of  death ;" 
 who  have  for  fo  many  ages  been  wandering  out  of  the  way 
 of  falvation,  "  without  Chrift,  and  without  God  in  the 
 ''  world." 
 
 The  work  of  the  miniftry,  in  every  place,  has  its  diffi- 
 eulties  and  dangers,  and  requires  much  wifdom,  fortitude, 
 patience,  and  felf-denial,  to  difcharge  it  in  a  right  manner, 
 with  an  encouraging  profpeft  of  fuccefs  :  but  greater  degrees 
 •f  prudence,  humility,  and  meeknefs,  mortification  to  the 
 prefent  world,  holy  courage,  and  zeal  for  the  honour  of  God 
 our  Saviour,  are  neceffary  where  any  are  called  to  minifter 
 the  gofpel  unto  thofe,  who  through  a  long  fuccefllon  of  ages 
 have  dwelt  in  the  darknefs  of  Heathenifm,  have  from  their 
 infancy  imbibed  inveterate  prejudices  ag.ainft  the  Chriftian, 
 faith,  and  from  time  immemorial  been  inured  to  many  fuper- 
 ftitious  and  idolatrous  practices,  directly  oppofiiie  to  the  na- 
 ture and  defign  of  the  gofpel. 
 
 What  heavenly  y^///  is  required,  to  convey  the  fupernatural 
 myfteries  of  the  golpel  into  the  minds  of  uninftrufted  Pagans, 
 who  are  "  a  people  of  a  ftrange  fpeech  and  hard  language?" 
 — What  Att^f elf -denial  is  neceflary,  to  enable  you  cheerfully 
 to  forfakc  the  plcafures  of  your  native  country,  with  the 
 agreeable  fociety  of  your  friends  and  acquaintance,  to  dwell 
 
 among 
 
48S  A     S  E  R  M  O  N     A  T     T  H  E 
 
 among  thofe  who  inhabit  not  indeed  "  the  high-v/ays  and 
 *•  hedges/'  but  uncultivated  defarts,  and  the  remoteft  lece/Tcs 
 of  the  wilderntfb? — What  unwearied  zeal  and  diligence,  to 
 profelyte  thofe  to  the  faith  of  the  gofpcl,  who  have  quench- 
 ed the  light  of  reafon,  and  by  their  inhumane  and  barbirous 
 pra61:ices  have  placed  themfelves  upon  a  level  with  the  brute- 
 creation  ? 
 
 Methinks,  I  hear  you  crying  out,  "  Who  is  fufficient  for 
 **  thefe  things!" — And  indeed,  if  you  had  no  ftrength  to  de- 
 pend upon,  but,  only  your  own, — no  encouragement,  but 
 from  human  afliftance,  you  might  juftly  fmk  down  in  a  dif- 
 confolate  defpair,  and  utter  the  palfionate  language  of  Mofes, 
 *'  O  my  Lord,  fend,  I  pray  thee,  by  the  hand  of  him  whona 
 "  thou  wilt  fend:"  thy  fervant  is  infufficient  for  fo  great  a 
 work — But  it  is  at  the  command  of  Chrifl,  the  great  Head 
 of  the  church,  that  you  go  forth  ;  who  by  a  train  of  furprifing 
 providences,  has  been  preparing  your  way  for  this  imporrant 
 embafTy ;  and  therefore  you  may  be  affured,  that  he  will  fup- 
 port  you  in  the  faithful  difcharge  of  your  duty,  accept  your 
 unfeigned  defires  to  promote  the  interefts  of  his  kingdom, 
 and  finally  reward  your  imperfeft  fervices  with  his  gracious 
 approbation.  You  have  his  divine  promife  for  your  fecurity 
 and  confolation ;  "  Lo !  I  am  with  you  alway,  even  to  the 
 "  end  of  the  world."  This  will  afford  you  light  in  every 
 darknefs, — defence  in  every  danger, — ffrcngth  in  every  weak- 
 nefs, — a  final  viftory  over  every  temptation.  If  Chrifl  be 
 with  you,  "  in  vain  do  the  Heathen  rage,"  in  vain  will  their 
 confederated  tribes  unite  their  forces  to  obftrufl  and  difcou- 
 rage  you.  Infinite  wifdom  will  be  your  guide, — almighty 
 power  your  fhield, — and  God  himfelf  "  your  exceeding  great 
 "  reward."  The  prefence  of  your  divine  ]\1  after  will  make 
 amends  for  the  abfence  of  your  deal  eft  friends  and  relatives. 
 This  will  transform  a  wild  and  uncultivated  defart  into  a  para- 
 dife  of  joy  and  pleafure;  and  the  lonely  hutts  of  favages  into 
 more  delightful  habitations  than  the  palaces  of  princes. 
 
 Let  not  then  any  difficulties  difcourage,  any  dangers  af- 
 fright you.  Go  forth  in  the  na?ne  and/Irength  of  the  Lord 
 Jefus,  to  whom  you  are  now  to  be  devoted  in  the  facred  of- 
 fice of  the  miniftry.  "  Be  not  afliamed  of  the  gofpel  of 
 "  Chrifl: ;  for  it  is  the  power  of  God  unto  falvation  to  every 
 "  one  that  believeth,  to  the  Jew  firft,  and  alfo  to  the  Gentile." 
 Let  zeal  for  the  honour  of  God,  and  compaffiun  for  the  fouls 
 ©f  men,  animate  your  public  difcourfes  and  piivate  addrefles 
 to  the  people  committed  to  your  charge.  Always  remember, 
 that  your  cJiarafter  is  a  viln;J]er  rf  Jsfus  ;  and  therefore  with 
 
 the 
 
 |l 
 
ORDINATION  OF  Mr  BRAINERD.     489 
 
 the  infpired  do(Stor  of  the  Gentiles,  you  "are  to  know  no- 
 *'  thing  among  them,  fave  Chrift  and  him  cruciiied."  Fre- 
 quently confider,  that  the  gofpel  is  a  divine  dilcipline  to 
 purity  the  heart,  and  fet  up  tiie  kingdom  of  the  Redeemer  in 
 the  louls  of  men:  and  therefore  it  is  not  fufficicnt  to  bring 
 finncrs  to  a  profelTion  of  the  name  of  Chrift,  and  an  outward  fub- 
 je(5lion  to  the  inftitutions  of  divine  worihip^:  •'  You  are  fent  to 
 "  turn  them  trom  darknefs  to  light,  and  from  the  power  of  Satan 
 "  unto  God, — that  they  may  receive  forgivencfs  of  fms,  and 
 *'  an  inheritance  among  them  that  are  fanctificd  by  faith  that 
 "  is  in  Chrift."  Unlefs  this  be  effected,  (whatever  other  im- 
 provements they  gain),  they  are  left  under  tlie  dominion  of 
 iin,  and  expofed  to  the  wrath  of  God  ;  and  their  fuperior  de- 
 grees of  knowledge  will  only  ferve  to  light  them  down  to  the 
 regions  of  death  and  milery. This  then  is  to  be  the  princi- 
 pal defign  of  your  miniftry:  for  this  you  arc  to  labour  with 
 unwearitd  application, — and  with  inceffant  importunity  to  en- 
 coinpals  the  throne  of  that  God,  whole  peculiar  prerogative 
 it  is  "to  teach  us  to  profit;"  whofe  grace  alone  can  make 
 then  **a  willing  people  in  the  day  of  his  power." 
 
 And  for  your  encouragement,  I  will  only  add,— -when  I 
 confider  the  many  prophecies,  in  facrcd  fcripture,  of  the  tri- 
 umphant progrefs  of  the  gofpel  in  the  lad  ages  of  the  world, 
 I  cannot  but  I  ft  up  my  head  ivith  joy,  in  an  humble  expecta- 
 tion, that  the  day  draws  near,  yea,  is  even  at  hand,  when  the 
 promifcs  made  to  the  Son  of  God  fhallbe  moreillufi:rioully  ful- 
 filled:—" when  he  Iliall  have  the  Heathen  fur  his  inheritance, 
 "  and  the  utmoft  ends  of  the  earth  for  his  pofTciTion;— -when 
 "  his  name  (hall  be  great  among  the  Gentiles,  and  be  honour- 
 *'  ed  and  adored  from   the   riling  of  the  fun   to  the  going 
 
 "  down  of  the   fan^e." But  if  the  appointed  time  is  not 
 
 yet  come,  and  the  attempts  made  to  introduce  this  glorious 
 day,  fail  of  defired  fuccefs,—  "your  judgment  will  be  with 
 "  the  Lord,  and  your  reward  with  your  God."  If  the  Gen- 
 tiles "be  not  gathered"  in;  you  will  "  be  glorious  in  the  eyes 
 *'  of  the  Lord,"  who  accepts  and  rewards  his  fcrvants  ac- 
 cording to  the  fincerity  of  their  defires,  and  not  according  to 
 the  fuccefs  of  their  endeavours. 
 
 I    {hall  conclude,    with  a  few  words  to   the  body  cf  the 
 people, 
 
 God  our  Saviour,  in  infinite  condefccnfion,  hath  feat  his  . 
 fcrvants  to  invite  you   to  come  in,  and  receive  the  blellings, 
 which  infinite  wifdom  has  contrived,  and  aflcniiliing  gi  ace 
 
 3    (^  pic  pared; 
 
49*  A     S  E  R  M  O  N     A  T     T  H  E 
 
 prepared,  for  your  entertainment.  And  furely,  my  brethren, 
 it  is  your  important  duty,  and  incomparable  interefV,  not  to 
 defpife  "the  falvation  of  God  fent  unto  the  Gentiles,"  nor 
 fnake  light  of  the  gofpel-mefTage  to  you. 
 
 God  has  been  plsafed  to  employ  us  the  meflengers  of  his 
 grace,  men  of  like  pajjlons  with  yourfelves,  I'ubjeft  to  th« 
 common  infirmities  of  human  nature  :  but  the  meffage  comes 
 from  him,  who  is  King  of  kings,  and  Lord  of  lords ;  whom 
 you  are  under  the  ftrongell  obligations  to  hear  and  obey,  in 
 point  of  intereft,  gratitude,  and  duty. 
 
 What  gracious  and  condefcending  methods  has  he  taken, 
 to  allure  and  invite  you  !  has  he  not  defcended  from  heaven  to 
 earth ;  from  the  boundlefs  glories  of  eternity,  to  all  the  fuf- 
 ferings  and  affliftions  of  this  mortal  life,  that  he  might  pur- 
 chafe  and  reveal  falvation ;  that  he  might  engage  your  love, 
 and  perfuade  you  to  comply  with  his  faving  defigns?  docs 
 he  not  fend  his  "  embaffadors  to  befcech  you  in  his  (lead,  to 
 **  be  reconciled  to  God?" 
 
 What  excufes  have  you  to  make,  that  will  ftand  the  trial 
 of  an  enlightened  confcience,  or  juftify  you  at  the  awful  tri- 
 bunal of  God?  will  the  vanifliing  enjoyments  of  fm  and  fenfe, 
 or  the  periihing  riches  of  this  tranfitory  world,  make  amends 
 for  the  lofs  of  the  divine  favour,  or  fupport  you  under  the 
 terrors  of  eternal  damnation? 
 
 Are  there  any  honours  comparable  to  the  dignity  and  cha- 
 ra£ler  of  a  child  of  God,— a  title  to  the  privileges  of  his  houfe 
 and  family  ?  Are  there  any  pleafures  equal  to  the  fmiles  of 
 God's  reconciled  face,— -the  refreflaing  vifits  of  his  love, — the 
 immortal  y(5y  J  ^jf  his  falvation? 
 
 But  how  deplorable,  how  defperate  will  be  your  cafe,  if 
 you  finally  refufe  the  gofpel-invitation,  and  periih  in  your  na- 
 tural ftate  of  guilt  and  mifery?  the  companionate  Jefus,  who 
 now  addrefles  you  in  the  inviting  language  of  love,  will  then 
 fpeak  to  you  with  the  voice  of  terror,  and  **  fwear  in  his 
 **  wrath,  that  you  fhall  never  enter  into  his  reft,  that  you 
 "  fhall  never  tafte  of  his  fupper,"  the  rich  provifion  which  he 
 has  made  for  the  eternal  entertainment  of  his  guefts.  "When 
 "  once  the  Mafter  of  the  houfe  is  rifen  up,  and  hath  fhut  to 
 "  the  door,"  you  will  in  vain  jiand  vjithout,  and  knock  for 
 admiffion. 
 
 In  a  word,    Now,  he   declares  by  his  fervants,  that  "  all 
 '*  things  are   ready,"— -and   all  that   are  bidden,  fliall  be  wel- 
 come, upon   their   coming  in,  to  be  fcirtaktrs  of  the  heneft. 
 The  blood  of  Chrift  is  now  ready,  to  cleanfe  you  from  all 
 your  guilt  and  pollution  j—his  righteoufncfs  is  now  ready,  to 
 
 adorn 
 
ORDINATION  OF  Mr  BRAINERD.     491 
 
 adorn  your  naked  fouls  with  the  garment  of  falvation,— • 
 his  Spirit  is  now  ready,  to  take  pofTeflion  of  you,  and  make 
 you  eternal  monuments  of  vi6lorious  and  redeeming  grace. 
 *'  The  Spirit  and  the  bride  fay,  Come;  and  whofoever  (of 
 "  the  loft  and  perifhing  fons  of  Adam)  will,  let  him  come," 
 and  participate  of  the  Weflings  of  the  gofpel  '^freely,  without 
 "  money,  and  without  price."  The  arms  of  everlafting  mercy 
 are  open,  to  receive  you  :  the  trcafures  of  divine  grace  arc 
 open,  to  fupply  your  wants :  and  qvery  one  of  you  that  now 
 iincerely  accepts  this  gracious  invitation,  ihAl  hereafter  be 
 admitted  "  to  fit  down  with  Abraham,  Ifaac,  and  Jacob,  in 
 "  the  kingdom  of  heaven." 
 
 For  which,  God  of  his  infinite  mercy  prepare  us  all,  through 
 Jefus  Chrift ;  to  whom  be  glory  and  dominion  world  without 
 end.     Amen. 
 
 3  0,2  Ai 
 
»)i^W)^>^«)!(^«5XX)K^^O!OK)^^)K«5(OK* 
 
 An       APPENDIX, 
 
 Containing  a  (hort  Account  of  the  Endeavours 
 that  have  been  uled  by  the  Miilionaries  of 
 the  Society  in  Scotland  for  propagating  Chri- 
 ftian  Knowledge,  to  introduce  the  Golpel  a- 
 mong  the  Indians  upon  the  Borders  of  New- 
 York,  ci'^. 
 
 THE  deplorable,  periHiing  fl:ate  of  the  Indians  In  thefe 
 parts  of  America,  being  by  feveral  minifters  here  rtpre- 
 fented  to  the  Society  in  Scotland  for  propagating  Chriltian 
 knowledge  ;  the  faid  Society  charitably  and  checrtully  came 
 into  the  propofal  of  maintaining  two  mijponaries  among  thefe 
 raiferable  Pagans,  to  endeavour  their  converfion  "from  dark- 
 "  nefb  to  light,  and  from  the  power*  of  Satan  unto  God :" 
 and  fent  their  commiflion  to  fome  minifters  and  other  gentle- 
 men here,  to  aft  as  their  correfpondents,  in  providing,  'di- 
 refting,  and  infpefting  the  faid  mifTion. 
 
 As  foon  as  the  Correfpondents  were  authorifed  by  the 
 Society's  commiffion,  they  immediately  looked  out  for  two 
 candidates  of  the  evangelical  miniftry,  whofe  zeal  for  the 
 interefts  of  the  Redeemei^s  kingdom,  and  whofe  compaffion 
 for  poor  perifliing  fouls,  would  prompt  them  to  luch  an  ex- 
 ceeding difficult  and  felf-denying  undertaking. Ihey   firft 
 
 •pre'  ailed  with  Mr  Azariah  Horton  to  relinquifli  a  call  to  an. 
 encouraging  parifli,  and  to  devote  himfelf  to   the    Indian  fer- 
 
 vice. He  was  directed  to  Long-Ifland,  in  Ai'guft  1741,  at 
 
 the  eafl  end  whereof  there  are  two  fmali  towns  of  the  Indians, 
 and  from  the  eaft  to  the  wefl  end  of  the  illand,  lefTer  compa- 
 nies fettled  at  a  few  miles  diftance  from  one  another,  for  the 
 length  of  above  an  hundred  miles. —  At  his  firft  coming  among 
 thele,  he  was  well  received  by  the  mofl,  and  heartily  wel- 
 comed by  fome  of  them.-~l  hey  at  the  taft  end  of  the  ifland 
 efpecially,  gave  diligent  and  fericus  attention  to  his  inftruc- 
 ticns,  and  were  many  of  them  put  upon  folemn  inquiries  a- 
 bout  "what  they  Ihould  do  to  be  faved.'V— A  general  refornx- 
 
 atioii 
 
A  N     A  P  P  E  N  D  I  X.  49J 
 
 fitlon  of  manners  was  foon  obfervable  among  the  moftof  thefe 
 Indians. — They  were  careful  to  attend,  and  ferious  and  fo- 
 lernn  in  attendance,  upon  both  pubUc  and  private  inflruftions. 
 -—A  nunilaer  of  them  were  under  very  deep  convictions  of 
 their  miferable  pcrifhing  ftate  ;  and  about  t-wcnty  of  them  give 
 lafting  evidences  of  their  faving  converlion  to  God.— -Mr  Hor- 
 ton  has  baptized  thirty-five  adults,  and  forty-four  children. — 
 He  took  p  tin-  \vith  them  to  learn  them  to  read  ;  and  fome  of 
 them  have  made  confiderable  proficiency.  But  the  extenllve- 
 ncis  of  his  charge,  and  the  necellity  of  his  travelling  from 
 phce  to  place,  makes  him  incapable  of  giving  fo  conftant  at- 
 tendance to  their  inftruclion  in  reading,  as  is  needful.  In  his 
 laft  letter  to  the  Correfpondents,  he  heavily  complains  of  a 
 great  defeSiion  of  f)  ne  of  them,  from  their  fi^fl  reformatioa 
 anJ  c.i're  0*1  tneir  fjuh,  occafioned  by  ftrong  drink  being 
 brought  among  them,  and  their  being  thereby  allured  to  a 
 relapfe  into  their  darling  vice  of  drunkeonefs:  a  vice  to  which, 
 the  Indians  are  every  where  fo  greatiy  addidled,  and  lo  vehe- 
 mently difpofed,  that  nothing  but  the  power  of  divine  grace 
 can  reftrain  that  impetuous  luft,  when  they  have  opportunity 
 to  gratify  it.  He  likewile  complains,  that  fome  of  them  are 
 grown  more  carelefs  and  remifs  in  the  duties  of  religious  wor- 
 fhip,  than  they  were  when  fi'-ft  acquainted  with  the  great 
 things  of  their  eternal  peace.— -But  as  a  number  retain  their 
 firft  impreffions,  and  as  they  generally  attend  with  reverence 
 upon  his  miniflry,  he  goes  on  in  his  work,  with  encouraging 
 hopes  of  the  prefence  and  blelling  of  God  with  him  in  his  dif- 
 ficult undertaking. 
 
 This  is  a  general  view  of  the  ftate  of  the  million  upon 
 Long-Ifland,  collected  from  fevcral  of  Mr  Horton's  letters; 
 which  is  all  that  could  now  be  offered,  not  having  as  yet  a 
 particular  account  from  Mr  Horton  himfelf. 
 
 It  was  fome  time  after  Mr  Horton  was  employed  in  the  In- 
 dian fervice,  before  the  Correfpondents  could  obtain  another 
 qualified  candidate  for  this  felf  denying  milRon.  At  length 
 they  prevailed  with  Mr  David  Braincrd,  to  refufe  feveral  in- 
 vitations unto  places  where  he  had  a  promifing  profpeft  of  a 
 comfortable  fettlemenr  amojig  the  Engiifh,  to  encounter  the 
 fatigues  and  perils  that  muft  attend  his  carrying  the  gofpel  of 
 
 Chrift  to  thefe  poor  miferable  favages A  general  reprefent- 
 
 ation  of  whofe  conduct  and  fuccefs  in  that  undertaking,  is 
 contained  in  a  letter  we  lately  received  from  himfelf,  which  is 
 as  follows. 
 
 T» 
 
494  A  N     A  P  P  E  N  D  I  X. 
 
 To  the  Reverend  MrEfiENEZER   Pembirton. 
 
 Rev.  Sir, 
 
 Since  you  are  plea  fed  to  require  of  me  fome  brief  and  ge- 
 neral account  of  my  condudl  in  the  aiFair  of  ray  miffion 
 amongft  the  Indians ;  the  pains  and  endeavours  I  have  ufed  to 
 propagate  Chriftian  knowledge  among  them ;  the  difficulties 
 I  have  met  with  in  purfuance  of  that  great  work  ;  and  the 
 Jiopeful  and  encouraging  appearances  I  have  obferved  in  any 
 cf  them  :  I  fiiall  now  endeavour  to  anfwer  your  demands,  by 
 giving  a  brief  but  faithful  account  of  the  moft  material  things 
 relating  to  that  important  affair,  with  which  I  have  been, 
 and  am  ftill  concerned.  And  this  I  fhall  do  with  more 
 freedom,  and  cheerfulnefs,  both  becaufe  I  apprehend  it 
 ■will  be  a  likely  means  to  give  pious  perfons,  who  are  con- 
 cerned for  the  kingdom  of  Chrift,  fome  jufl  apprehenfion 
 of  the  many  and  great  difficulties  that  attend  the  propa- 
 g;ation  of  it  amongft  the  poor  Pagans,  and  confequently 
 it  is  hopeful,  will  engage  their  more  frequent  and  fervent 
 prayers  to  God,  that  thofe  may  be  fuccecded,  who  are  era- 
 ployed  in  this  arduous  work  :  and  alfo  becaufe  I  perfuade  my- 
 ielf,  that  the  tidings  of  the  gofpel's  fpreading  among  the  ppor 
 Heathen,  will  be,  to  thofe  who  arc  waiting  for  the  aceom- 
 plifhment  of  the  "glorious  things  fpoken  of  the  city  of  our 
 **  God,"  as  "good  news  from  a  far  country;"  and  that  the/e 
 ■will  be  fo  far  from  "defpifing  the  day  of  fmall  things,"  that, 
 on  the  contrary,  the  leaft  dawn  of  encouragement  and  hope, 
 in  this  important  affair,  will  rather  infpire  their  pious  breafts 
 with  more  generous  and  warm  defires,  that  "  the  kingdoms  of 
 "  this  world,  may  fpcedily  Income  the  kingdoms  of  our 
 *'  Lord,  and  of  his  Chrift." 
 
 I  fhall  therefore  immediately  proceed  to  the  bufinefs  be- 
 fore me,  and  briefly  touch  upon  the  moft  important  matters, 
 that  have  concerned  my  million,  from  the  beginning  to  this 
 prefent  time. 
 
 On  March  15.  1743.  ^  waited  on  the  Correfpondents  for 
 the  Indian  miffion  at  New-York ;  and  the  week  following, 
 attended  their  meeting  at  Woodbridge  in  New-Jerfey,  and 
 was  fpeedily  difmifTed  by  them  with  orders  to  attempt  the  in- 
 liruftion  of  a  number  of  Indians  in  a  place  fome  miles  diftant 
 from  the  city  of  Albany.  And  on  the  firft  day  of  April  fol- 
 lowing, I  arrived  among  the  Indians,  at  a  place  called  by  them 
 
 Kaunaumeek, 
 
A  N     A  P  P  E  N  D  I  X.  495 
 
 Kaunaumeek^  in  the  county  of  Albany,  near  about  twenty 
 miles  diftant  from  the  city  eaftward. 
 
 The  place,  as  to  its  iituation,  was  fufficiently  loncfomc, 
 and  unplcafant,  being  encompafTed  with  mountains  and 
 •woods ;  twenty  miles  diftant  from  any  Englilh  inhabitants ; 
 fix  or  fcvcn  from  any  Dutch ;  and  more  than  two  from  a 
 family  that  came,  fomc  time  fmce,  from  the  Highlands  of 
 Scotland,  and  had  then  lived  (as  I  remember)  about  two  years 
 in  this  wildernefs.  In  this  family  I  lodged  about  the  fpace  of 
 three  months,  the  mailer  of  it  being  the  only  perfon  with 
 •whom  I  could  readily  converfe  in  thofe  parts,  except  my  in- 
 terpreter; others  underftanding  very  little  Englifh. 
 
 After  I  had  fpent  about  three  months  in  this  Ihuation,  I 
 found  my  diftance  from  the  Indians  a  very  great  difadvantage 
 to  my  work  amongft  them,  and  very  burdenforae  to  myfelf; 
 as  I  was  obliged  to  travel  forward  and  backward  alraofl:  daily 
 on  foot,  having  no  pafture  in  which  I  could  keep  rhy  horfc 
 for  that  purpofe.  And  after  all  my  pains,  could  not  be  with 
 the  Indians  in  the  evening  and  morning,  which  were  ufually 
 the  beft  hours  to  find  them  at  home,  and  when  they  could 
 beft  attend  my  inftru£lions. 
 
 I  therefore  refolved  to  remove,  and  live  with  or  near  the 
 Indians,  that  I  might  watch  all  opportunities,  when  they 
 were  generally  at  home,  and  take  the  advantage  offuchfea- 
 fons  for  their  inftru6tion. 
 
 Accordingly  I  removed  foon  after ;  and,  for  a  time,  lived 
 with  them  in  one  of  their  -wigwams:  and  not  long  after, 
 built  mc  a  fmall  houfe,  where  I  fpent  the  remainder  of 
 that  year  entirely  alone ;  my  interpreter  (who  was  an  Indian) 
 choofing  rather  to  live  in  a  wigwam  among  his  own  country- 
 men. 
 
 This  way  of  living  I  found  attended  with  many  difficulties, 
 and  uncomfortable  circumftances,  in  a  place  where  I  couid 
 get  none  of  the  neceffaries  and  common  comforts  of  life, 
 (no,  not  fo  much  as  a  morfel  of  bread),  but  what  I  brought 
 from  places  fifteen  and  twenty  miles  diftant,  and  oftentimes 
 was  obliged,  for  fome  time  together  to  content  myfelf 
 without,  for  want  of  an  opportunity  to  procure  the  things  I 
 needed. 
 
 But  although  the  difficulties  of  this  folitary  way  of  living 
 are  not  the  Icait,  or  moft  inconhderable,  (and  doubtlefs  are  in 
 fa 61  many  more  and  greater  to  thofe  who  experience,  than 
 they  can  readily  appsar  to  thofe,  who  only  view  them  at  a 
 diftance) ;  yet  I  can  truly  fay,  that  the  burden  1  felt  refpeft- 
 ing  my  grc4it  ivtrk  among  the  poor  Indians,  the  fear  and  con- 
 cern 
 
496  .        A  N     A  P  P  E  N  D  I  X. 
 
 cern  that  continually  hung  upon  my  fpirit,  left  they  fhould 
 be  prejudifcd  againft  Chriftianity,  and  their  minds  imbittcred 
 againft  me,  and  my  labours  among  them,  by  means  of  tlic 
 iniinuations  oF fome  who  (although  they  are  called  Chrijt'uws) 
 feem  to  have  no  concern  hn-  Chrift's  kjjtgdom,  but  had  rathei" 
 (as  their  condudt  plainly  difcovers)  that  the  Indians  ihould  re- 
 main Heathens,  that  they  may  with  the  more  eale  cheat,  and 
 ib  enrich  themfelves  by  them ;  the  burden,  I  fay,  the  tear 
 and  concern  1  felt  in  thefe  refpe^ls,  were  much  more  preffing 
 to  me,  than  all  the  difficulties  that  attended  the  circumftanees 
 of  my  living. 
 
 As  to  int/late  or  temper  of  mind,  in  which  I  found  thefc 
 Indians,  at  my  firft  coming  among  them,  I  may  jullly  fay, 
 it  was  much  more  dciirable,  and  encouraging,  than  what  ap- 
 pears among  thofe  who  are  altogether  uncultivated.  '1  heir 
 Heatheniili  jealoufies  and  fufpicion,  and  their  prejudices  a- 
 gainft  Chriftianity,  were  in  a  great  meafure  removed  by  the 
 long-continued  lab  .^urs  of  the  Reverend  Air  Sargcant  among  a 
 nuaibcr  of  the  fame  tribe,  in  a  place  little  more  than  twenty 
 ilxiles  diftant ;  by  which  means  thefe  were,  in  fome  good  de- 
 gree, prcp:ired  to  entertain  the  truths  of  Chriftianity,  inftead 
 of  objecting  againft  them,  and  appearing  almoft  entirely  un- 
 trafliable,  as  is  common  with  them  at  firft,  and  as  perhaps 
 thefe  appeared  a  few  years  ago.  Some  of  them,  at  leaft,  ap- 
 peared very  well  difpofed  toward  religion,  and  feemed  much 
 plcafed  with  my  coming  among  them. 
 
 In  my  labours  with  them,  in  order  "  to  turn  them  fiom 
 *'  darknefs  to  light,"  1  ftudicd  what  was  moft  plain  and  eajy, 
 and  beft  fuited  to  their  capacities;  and  endeavoured  to  let 
 before  them  from  time  to  time  (as  they  were  able  to  receive 
 them)  the  moft  important  and  necejfary  truths  of  Chrifti- 
 anity ;  fuch  as  moft  immediately  concerned  their  fpeedy  con- 
 verflon  to  God,  and  fuch  as  i  judged  had  the  greateft  tendency 
 fas  means)  to  effeft  that  glorious  change  in  them.  But  efpe- 
 cially  I  made  it  the  fcope  and  drift  of  all  my  labours,  to  lead 
 them  into  a  thorough  acquaintance  with  thefe  two  things. — 
 FirJ}y  The  Jinfidnefs  and  mifeiy  of  the  eftate  they  were  na^ 
 turally  in',  the  evil  of  their  hearts,  the  pollution  of  their  na- 
 tures ;  the  heavy  guilt  they  were  under>  and  their  expofed- 
 nefs  to  everlafting  punifhment;  as  alfo  their  utter  inability 
 to  fave  themfelves,  either  from  their  fins,  or  from  thofe  mi- 
 feries  which  are  the  juft  punilliment  of  them ;  and  their  un- 
 worthinefs  of  any  mercy  at  the  hand  of  God,  on  account  of 
 any  thing  they  themfelves  could  do  to  procure  Ins  favour,  and 
 
 eonfequently  their  extreme  need  of  Clirift  to  favc  them. 
 
 And 
 
A  N     A  P  P  E  N  D  I  X.  497 
 
 And,  feeondly,  I  frequently  endeavoured  to  open  to  them  the 
 fulnefsy  alL-fufficiency,  zndfreenefs  of  that  redeinption,  which 
 the  Son  of  God  has  wrought  out  by  his  obedience  and  fuifcr- 
 ings,  for  perifliing  Tinners  :  how  this  provifion  he  had  made, 
 "was  fuited  to  all  their  wants ;  and  how  he  called  and  invited 
 them  to  accept  of  everlafting  life  freely,  notwithllanding  all 
 their  finfulncfs,  inability,  unworthinefs,  6c. 
 
 After  I  had  been  with  the  Indians  feveral  months,  I  com- 
 pofed  fundry /o/vnj-  of  prayer,  adapted  to  their  circumftances 
 and  capacities;  which  with  the  help  of  my  interpreter,  I 
 tranilated  into  the  Indian  language;  and  foon  learned  to  pro- 
 Bounce  their  words,  fo  as  to  pray  with  them  in  their  own 
 tongue.  I  alfo  tranflated  fundry  pfdms  into  their  lan- 
 guage, and  foon  after  we  were  able  to  ling  in  the  worfhip 
 of  God. 
 
 When  my  people  had  gained  fome  acquaintance  with  many 
 of  the  truths  of  Chriftianity,  fo  that  they  were  capable  of  re- 
 ceiving and  anderftanding  many  others,  which  at  firft  could 
 not  be  taught  them,  by  reafon  of  their  ignorance  of  thofe  that 
 were  nece/Tiry  to  be  previoufly  known,  and  upon  which  o- 
 thers  depended ;  I  then  gave  them  an  h'fior'ical  account  of 
 God's  dealings  with  his  ancient  profefling  people  the  Jews ; 
 fome  of  the  rites  and  ceremonies  they  were  obliged  to  ob- 
 ferve,  as  their  facrifices,  drc. ;  and  what  thefe  were  defigned 
 to  reprefent  to  them  :  as  alfo  fome  of  the  furprihng  miracles 
 God  wrought  for  their  falvation,  while  they  truilsd  in  him, 
 and  the  fore  puniQiments  he  fometimes  brought  upon  them, 
 when  they  forfook  and  linned  againil  him.  Afterwards  I  pro- 
 ceeded to  give  them  a  relation  of  the  birth,  life,  miracles,  fuf- 
 ferings,  death,  and  refurreflion  of  Chrift;  as  well  as  his  al- 
 cenfion,  and  the  wonderful  eifufion  of  the  holy  Spirit  confe- 
 qucnt  thereupon. 
 
 And  having  thus  endeavoured  to  prepare  the  way  by  fuch 
 a  general  account  of  things,  I  next  proceeded  to  read,  and  ejc- 
 potmd  to  them  the  gofpcl  of  St  Matthew  (at  leaft  the  fub- 
 fliance  of  it)  in  courfe,  wherein  they  had  a  more  diltin^l  and 
 particular  view  of  what  they  had  before  fome  general  notion  of. 
 
 Thefe  expofitions  I  attended  almoft  every  evening,  when 
 there  was  any  conilderable  number  of  them  at  home ;  except 
 when  I  was  obliged  to  be  abfent  myfelf,  in  order  to  learn  the 
 
 Indian  language  with  the  Reverend  Mr  Sargeant. Befides 
 
 thefe  means  of  inftruflion,  there  was  likewile  an  Englifli yc/»oo/ 
 conftantly  kept  by  my  interpreter  among  the  Indians ;  which 
 I  ufed  frequently  to  vifit,  in  order  to  give  the  children  and 
 young  people  fome  proper  inflruftions,  and  fcrious  exhorta- 
 tions fuited  to  their  age. 
 
 3  R  The 
 
49^  A  N     A  P  P  E  N  D  I  X. 
 
 The  degree  of  hioiuledge  to  which  feme  of  them  attained, 
 was  confiderable.  Many  of  the  truths  of  ChrilBanity  feem- 
 ed  fixed  in  their  minds,  (efpecially  in  fome  inftances),  fo  that 
 they  would  fpeak  to  me  of  them,  and  aflc  fuch  queftions  about 
 them,  as  were  neceflary  to  render  them  more  plain  and  clear 
 to  their  undciftandings. 
 
 The  children  alfo,  and  young  people,  who  attcpded  the 
 fchool,  made  confiderable  proficiency  (at  leaft  fome  of  them) 
 in  their  learning;  (o  that  had  they  undcrftood  the  Englifli  lan- 
 guage well,  they  would  have  been  able  to  read  fomewhat 
 readily  in  a  pfalter. 
 
 But  that  which  was  moft:  of  all  defirable,  and  gave  me  the 
 greatell  encouragement  aniidfl:  many  difficulties  and  difconfo- 
 late  hours,  was,  that  the  truths  of  God's  word  feemed,  at 
 times,  to  be  attended  with  fome  power  upon  rhe  hearts  and 
 confciences  of  the  Indians.  And  efpecially  this  appeared  e- 
 vident  in  a  few  inftances,  who  were  awakened  to  fome  fcnfe 
 cf  their  miferable  eftate  by  nature,  and  appeared  felicitous 
 for  deliverance  from  it.  Several  of  them  came,  of  their  own 
 accord,  to  difcourfe  with  me  about  their  fouls  concerns;  and 
 fome,  with  tears,  inquired  "  what  they  fhould  do  to  be 
 **  faved  P"  and  whether  the  God  that  Chriflians  ferved,  would 
 be  mereiful  to  thole  that  had  been  frequently  drunk?   <6c. 
 
 And  although  I  cannot  fay,  I  have  fatisfaftory  evidences 
 of  their  being  '*  renewed  in  the  fpirit  of  their  mind,"  and 
 favingly  converted  to  God  ;  yet  the  Spirit  of  God  did  (I 
 apprehend)  in  fuch  a  manner  attend  the  means  of  grace, 
 and  io  operate  upon  their  minds  thereby,  as  might  juftly 
 afford  matter  of  encouragement  to  hope,  that  God  defigned 
 good  CO  them,  and  that  he  was  preparing  his  way  into  their  fouls. 
 
 There  likewife  appeared  a  reformation  in  the  lives  and  man- 
 ners of  the  Indians. 
 
 Their  'kSoXzivoms  facrifices  (of  which  there  was  but  one  or 
 two,  that  I  know  of,  after  my  coming  among  them)  were 
 wholly  laid  afide.  And  their  Heathcnifh  cuftom  of  danc':ng, 
 hallooing,  &c.  they  feemed  in  a  confiderable  meafure  broken 
 off  from.  And  I  could  not  but  hope,  that  they  were  reform- 
 ed in  fome  meafure  from  the  fin  of  drunktnnefs.  They  like- 
 wife  manifefled  a  regard  to  the  Lord's  day  ;  and  not  only  be- 
 haved foberly  themfelves,  but  took  care  alfo  to  keep  their 
 children  in  order. 
 
 Yet  after  all  I  mufl;  confefs,  that  as  there  werf  many  hope- 
 ful appearances  among  them,  fo  there  were  fome  things  more 
 d'fc  our  aging.  And  while  1  rejoiced  to  obferve  any  fcriouf- 
 nefs,  and  concern  aaiong  them  about  the  affairs  of  their  fouls, 
 ilill  1  was  not  without  continual   fear  and  concern,  left  fuch 
 
 er.coura£Tin!7 
 
AN     APPENDIX. 
 
 499 
 
 encouraging  appearances  might  prove  "like  a  morning-cloud, 
 "  that  paiTeth  away." 
 
 When  I  had  fpcnt  near  a  year  with  the  Indians,  I  inform- 
 ed them  that  I  expelled  to  leave  them  in  the  fpring  then  ap- 
 proachinT,  and  to  be  fent  to  another  tribe  of  In-ii:ins,  at  a 
 great  diftanee  from  them:  upon  hearing  of  which  they  ap- 
 peared V'ery  forrowful,  and  loi-ne  of  them  endeavoured  to 
 perfuade  me  to  continue  with  them;  urging  that  they  had 
 now  heard  fo  much  about  their  foids  concerns,  that  tJiey 
 could  never  more  be  willing  to  live  as  they  had  djne,  without 
 a  m'mifter,  and  further  inilructions  in  the  way  to  heaven,  6c. 
 Whereupon  I  told  them,  they  ought  to  be  willing  that  others 
 alfo  (hould  hear  about  their  fouls  concerns,  feeing  thofe  need- 
 ed it  as  much  as  thcmfelves.  Yet  further  to  difTuade  me  from 
 going,  they  added,  that  thofe  Indians,  to  whom  I  had 
 thoughts  of  going  (as  they  had  heard)  were  not  willing  to  be- 
 come Chriji'iansy  as  they  were,  and  therefore  urged  me  to 
 tarry  with  them.  I  then  told  them,  that  they  might  receive 
 further  inftruction  without  me ;  but  the  Indians,  to  whom  I 
 expected  to  be  fent,  could  not,  there  being  no  minifter  near 
 to  teach  them-  And  hereupon  I  advifed  them,  in  cafe  I 
 /hould  leave  them,  and  be  fent  otherwhere,  to  remove  to 
 Stockbridge,  where  they  might  be  fupplied  with  land,  and 
 conveniencies  of  living,  and  be  under  the  miniftry  of  the  Re- 
 verend Mr  Sargcant :  which  advice,  and  propofal,  they  feem- 
 ed  difpofed  to  comply  with. 
 
 On  April  6.  1 744.  I  was  ordered  and  directed  by  the  cor- 
 refpondciits  for  the  Indian  miflion,  to  take  leave  of  the  people, 
 with  whom  I  had  then  fpent  a  full  year,  and  to  go  (as  foon 
 as  conveniently  I  couldj  to  a  tribe  of  Indians  on  Delavv^are 
 river  in  Pennfylvania. 
 
 Thefe  orders  I  foon  attended,  and  on  April  29th  took 
 leave  of  my  people,  who  v/ere  moftly  removed  to  Stockbridge 
 under  the  care  of  the  Reverend  Mr  Sargeant.  I  then  fet  out 
 on  my  journey  toward  Delaware;  and  on  May  loth,  met 
 with  a  number  of  Indians  in  a  place  called  Tvlinni (links,  about 
 an  hundred  and  forty  miles  from  Kaunauraeek,  (the  place 
 v/here  I  fpent  the  laft  year),  and  tlireftly  in  my  way  to  i.)ela- 
 ware  river.  With  thefe  Indians  I  fpcnt  fome  time,  and  firft 
 addreffed  their  hlng  in  a  friendly  manner;  and  after  fome  dif- 
 courfc,  and  attempts  to  contract  a  friendlhip  with  him,  I  told 
 him  I  had  a  dcfire  (for  his  benefit  and  happinefs)  to  inftruft 
 them  in  Chrijl'i unity.  At  which  he  laughed,  turned  his  back 
 upon  me,  and  went  away.  I  then  addreflcd  another  princi- 
 pal man  in  the  fame  manner,  who  faid  he  was  willing  to  hear 
 me.     After  fome  time,  I  followed  the  king  into  his  houfc, 
 
 3  R  2  and 
 
500 
 
 AN     APPENDIXl. 
 
 and  renewed  my  difcourfe  to  him :  but  he  declined  talking, 
 and  left  the  affair  to  another,  who  appeared  to  be  a  rational 
 man.  He  began,  and  talked  very  warmly  near  a  quarter  of 
 an  hour  together;  he  inquired  why  1  defired  the  Indians  to 
 become  Chrifiians,  feeing  the  Chriftians  were  fo  much  worfe 
 than  the  Indians  are  in  their  prefent  ftate.  The  Chriftians, 
 he  laid,  would  lie,  fteal,  and  drink,  worfe  than  the  Indians. 
 It  was  they  firft  taught  the  Indians  to  be  drunk  :  and  they  ftcle 
 from  one  another,  to  that  degree,  that  their  rulers  were  ob- 
 liged to  hang  them  for  it,  and  that  was  not  fufficient  to  deter 
 others  from  the  like  pradice.  But  the  Indians,  he  added, 
 "were  none  of  them  ever  hanged  for  ftealing,  and  yet  they  did 
 not  fteal  half  fo  much  ;  and  he  fuppofcd  that  if  the  Indians 
 fliuuld  become  Chriftians,  they  would  then  be  as  bad  as  thefe. 
 And  hereupon  he  faid,  they  would  live  as  their  fathers  lived, 
 and  go  w^here  then  fathers  were  when  they  died.  I  then  free- 
 \y  oiuned,  lamented,  and  joined  with  him  in  condemning  the 
 ill  conduct  of  fjme  who  are  called  Chrr/lmns:  told  him,  thefe 
 ■wrre  not  ChnJIians  in  heart ;  that  1  hated  fuch  wicked  prac- 
 tices, and  did  not  defire  the  Indians  to  become  fuch  as  thefe. 
 — And  when  he  appeared  calmer,  I  aflced  him  if  he  was  will- 
 ing that  I  lliould  Clime  and  fee  them  again  :  he  replied,  he 
 flvjuld  be  willing  to  fee  n.e  again,  as  z  friend,  if  I  would  not 
 dehre  them  to  become  Chriftians. — I  then  h\(\  them  farewell, 
 and  profecuted  my  journey  toward  l-<elaware.  And  N'lay 
 13th  I  arrived  at  a  place  called  by  the  Indians,  Sakhauwotung, 
 >vitbin  the  Forks  of  Delaware  in  Pennfylvania. 
 
 Here  alfo,  when  I  came  to  the  Indians,  I  falutcd  their 
 Jcing,  and  others,  in  a  manner  I  thought  moft  engaging. 
 And  foon  after  informed  the  king  of  my  defire  to  inftruft 
 them  in  the  Chrifiian  religion.  After  he  had  confulted  a 
 few  minutes  with  two  or  three  old  men,  he  told  me,  he  was 
 ■willing  to  hear.  I  then  preached  to  thofe  few  that  were  pre- 
 fent :  who  appeared  very  attentive,  and  well  dilpofed.  And 
 the  king  in  particular  feemed  both  to  wonder,  and  at  the 
 fame  time  to  be  well  pleafcd  with  what  I  taught  them,  re- 
 fpe6ting  the  divine  Being,  6<:.  And  fmce  that  time  he  has 
 ever  fliewn  himfelf  friendly  to  me,  giving  me  free  liberty  to 
 preach  in  his  houfe,  whenever  I  think  fit.--Here  therefore  I 
 have  fpcnt  the  greater  part  of  the  fummer  paft,  preaching 
 ufually  in  the  king's  houfe. 
 
 The  number  of  Indians  in  thi-:  place  is  but  fmall;  moft 
 of  thofe  that  formerly  belonged  here,  are  difperfed,  and  re- 
 moved to  places  farther  back  in  the  country.  There  are  not 
 more  than  ten  houfcs  hereabouts,  that  continue  to  be  inha- 
 bited ;  and  fome  of  thefe  are  feveral  miles  diftant  from  others, 
 
 which 
 
AN    APPENDIX.  ^01. 
 
 which  makes  it  difficult  for  the  Indians  to  meet  together  fo 
 frequently  as  could  be  de  fired. 
 
 When  I  firft  began  to  preach  here,  the  number  of  my  hear* 
 €is  was  very  fmall ;  often  not  exceeding  twenty  or  twenty -five 
 perfons :  but  towards  the  latter  part  of  the  fummer,  their 
 number  increafed,  fo  that  I  have  frequently  had  forty  per- 
 fons, cir  more,  at  once:  and  oftentimes  the  mofl  of  thofc  be- 
 longing to  thofe  parts,  came  together  to  hear  me  preach. 
 
 The  effe^s  whicii  the  truths  of  God's  word  have  had  upoa 
 fome  of  the  Indians,  in  this  place,  arc  fomewhat  encoura- 
 ging. Sundry  of  them  are  brought  to  renounce  idolatry,  and 
 to  decline  partaking  of  thofe /ftfy?^  which  they  ufed  to  offer 
 in  facrifice  to  certain  fuppoled  unknown  powers.  And  fome 
 few  inftances  among  them  have,  for  a  conliderable  time,  ma- 
 nifefred  a  ferious  concern  for  their  fouls  eternal  welfare, 
 and  ftill  continue  to  "  inquire  the  way  to  Zion,"  with  fuch  di- 
 ligence, afFeflion,  and  becoming  folicitude,  as  gives  me  rea- 
 fon  to  hope,  that  "  God  who  (1  truft)  has  begun  this  work 
 "  in  them,"  will  carry  it  on,  until  it  Ihall  iffue  in  their  fa- 
 ving  converfion  to  himfelf.  Thefe  not  only  detefl  their  old 
 idolatrous  notions,  but  ftrive  alfo  to  bring  their  friends  ofT 
 from  them.  And  as  they  are  feeking  falvation  for  their  own 
 fouls,  fo  they  feem  defirous,  and  fome  of  them  take  pains, 
 that  others  might  be  excited  to  do  the  like. 
 
 In  July  laft  I  heard  of  a  number  of  Indians  refiding  at  a 
 place  called  Kaukfefauchung,  more  than  thirty  miles  weft- 
 ward  from  the  place  where  I  ufually  preach.  I  vifited  them, 
 found  about  thirty  perfons,  and  propoled  ray  defire  of  preach- 
 ing to  them  ;  they  readily  complied,  and  I  preached  to  them 
 only  twice,  they  being  juft  then  removing  from  this  place, 
 where  they  only  lived  for  the  prefent,  to  Sufquahannah-river 
 where  they  belonged. 
 
 While  I  was  preaching,  they  appeared  fober,  and  attentive; 
 and  were  fomewhat  furpri fed,  having  never  before  heard  of 
 thefe  things.  There  were  two  or  three,  who  fufpefted  that 
 I  had  fome  ill  defign  upon  them ;  and  urged,  that  the  white 
 people  had  abufed  them,  and  taken  their  lands  from  them, 
 and  therefore  they  had  no  rcafun  to  think  that  they  were 
 now  concerned  for  their  happinefs  ;  but,  on  the  contrary, 
 that  they  defigned  to  make  them  flaves,  or'get  them  on  board 
 their  veffels,  and  make  them  fight  with  the  people  over  the 
 water,  (as  they  expreffed  it),  meaning  the  French  and  Spa- 
 niards. However,  the  moft  of  them  appeared  very  friendly, 
 and  tald  me,  they  were  then  going  direftly  home  to  Suf- 
 quahannah,  and  defired  I  would  make  them  a  vifit  there, 
 and  manifefled  a  ccnfidcrable  defire  of  farther  inftruftion. 
 
 This 
 
502  A  N     A  P  P  E  N  D   I  X. 
 
 This  Invitation  gave  me  fome  encouragement  in  my  great 
 work  ;  and  made  me  hope,  that  God  dciigned  to  "  open  an 
 "  effeftual  door  to  me"  for  fpreading  the  gofpcl  among  the 
 poor  Heathen  farther  weflward. 
 
 In  the  beginning  of  Oftober  laft,  with  the  advice  and  direc- 
 tion of  the  correfpondcnts  for  the  Indian  miflion,  I  under- 
 took a  journey  to  Sufquahannah.  And  after  three  ckys  te- 
 dious travel,  two  of  them  through  a  wildcrnefs  almoft  unpafl- 
 able  by  reafon  of  mountains  and  rocks,  and  two  niglus  lod- 
 ging in  the  open  wildernefs,  I  came  to  an  Indian  fcttlcrr.ent 
 on  the  fide  of  Sufquahannah  river,  called  Opeholhaupung; 
 ■where  were  twelve  Indian  houfes,  and  (as  nigh  as  1  could 
 learn)  about  feventy  fouls,  old  and  young,  belonging  to  ihem. 
 
 Here  alfo,  foon  after  my  arrival,  I  vifited  the  king,  ad- 
 dreifing  him  with  expreffions  of  kindnefs  :  and  after  a  few 
 words  of  friendlliip,  informed  him  of  my  defire  to  teach  them 
 the  knowledge  of  Chriflianity.  He  hefitated  not  long  before 
 he  Cold  me,  that  he  was  willing  to  hear.  1  then  preached ; 
 and  continued  there  fcveral  days,  preaching  every  day,  as 
 long  as  the  Indians  were  at  home.  And  they  in  order  to 
 hear  me,  deferred  the  defign  of  their  general  hunting  (which 
 they  were  juft  then  entering  upon)  for  the  fpace  of  three  or 
 four  days. 
 
 The  men,  I  think,  univerfally  (except  one)  attended  ray 
 preaching.  Only,  the  ivomen,  fuppofing  the  affair  we  were 
 upon  was  of  a  public  nature,  belonging  only  to  the  men,  and 
 not  what  every  individual  perfon  fhould  concern  himfclf  with, 
 could  not  readily  be  perfuaded  to  come  and  hear  :  but,  after 
 much  pains  ufed  with  them  for  that  purpofe,  fome  few  ven- 
 tured to  come,  and  fland  at  a  diftance. 
 
 When  I  had  preached  to  the  Indians  feveral  times,  fome  of 
 them  very  frankly  propofed  what  they  had  to  objeft  againfl 
 Chriftianity  ;  and  fo  gave  me  a  fair  opportunity  for  ufing  my 
 befl  endeavours  to  remove  from  their  minds  thofe  fcruples 
 and  jealoufies  they  laboured  under :  and  when  I  had  endea- 
 voured to  anfwer  their  obje<5tions,  fome  appeared  much  fa- 
 tibficd.  I  then  afked  the  king,  if  he  was  willing  I  fhould 
 vi(it,  and  preach  to  them  again,  if  I  fhould  live  to  the  next 
 fpring :  he  replied,  he  fhould  Ipe  heartily  willing  for  his  own 
 part,  and  added,  he  wifhed  the  young  people  would  learn,  i)c. 
 I  then  put  the  fame  queftion  to  the  reft :  feme  anfwercd, 
 they  fhould  be  very  glad,  and  none  manifefted  any  diflike  to  it. 
 
 There  were  fundry  other  things  in  their  behaviour,  which 
 appeared  with  a  comfortable  and  encouraging  afpe<51 ;  that, 
 upon  the  whole,  I  couLl  not  but  rejoice  I  had  taken  that  jour- 
 ney among  them,  although  it  was  attended  with  many  diffi- 
 culties 
 
A  N     A  P  P  E  N  D  I  X.  503 
 
 cuklcs  and  hardfhips.  The  method  I  ufed  with  them,  and 
 the  inftiu6tions  1  gave  them,  (I  am  pciTuaded),  were  means  in 
 fome  meafure,  to  remove  their  heathenilli  jealoufies,  and  pre- 
 judices againft  Chriftianity :  and  1  could  not  but  hope,  the 
 God  of  all  grace  was  preparing  their  minds  to  receive 
 "  the  truth  as  it  is  in  Jefus."  If  this  may  be  the  happy  con- 
 fequeii^ce,  I  (hall  not  only  rejoice  in  ray  part  labours  and  fa- 
 tigues; but  fhall,  I  truft,  alfo  "  be  willing  to  fpend  and  be 
 "  fpent,"  if  I  may  thereby  be  inftrumental  "  to  turn  them 
 "  from  darknefs  to  light,  and  from  the  power  of  Satan  to  God." 
 
 Thus,  Sir,  I  have  given  you  a  faithful  account  of  what 
 has  been  mofl:  coniiderable  refpedling  my  milTion  among  the 
 Indians  ;  in  which  I  have  ftudied  all  convenient  brevity.  I 
 /hill  jnly  n.jw  take  leave  to  add  a  word  or  two  refpefting  the 
 d'.^culties  that  attend  the  Chriftianizing  of  thefe  poor  Pagans. 
 
 In  the  firll-  place,  their  minds  are  filled  with  prejudices  a- 
 g'/tnll  Chriftianity,  on  account  of  the  vicious  lives  and  uri- 
 ehriftian  behaviour  of  fome  that  are  called  Chriftians.  Thefe 
 n  it  only  fet  before  them  the  worft  examples,  but  fome  of 
 them  take  pains,  exprefsly  in  words,  to  diffuade  them  from 
 becomiag  Chriftians  ;  forefeeing,  that  if  thefe  ftiould  be  con- 
 verted to  God,  "the  hope  of  their  unlawful  gain"  would 
 thereby  be  loft. 
 
 Again,  thefe  poor  Heathens  are  extremely  attached  to  the 
 cuftoms,  traditions,  and  fabulous  notions  of  their  fathers. 
 And  this  one  feems  to  be  the  foundation  of  all  their  other 
 notions,  viz.  that  "  it  was  not  the  fame  God  made  them, 
 *'  who  made  the  white  people,"  but  another,  who  commanded 
 them  to  live  by  hunting,  6c.  and  not  conform  to  the  cuftoms 
 of  the  white  people. Hence  when  they  are  defired  to  be- 
 come Chriftians,  they  frequently  reply,  that  "they  will  live 
 *'  as  their  fathers  lived,  and  go  to  their  fathers  when  they 
 "  die."  And  if  the  miracles  of  Chrift  and  his  apoftles  be 
 mentioned,  to  prove  the  truth  of  Chriftianity ;  they  alfo  men- 
 tion fundry  miracles,  which  their  fathers  have  told  them 
 were  anciently  wrought  among  the  Indians,    and  which  Satan 
 
 makes  them  believe  were  fo. They  are  much  attached  to 
 
 idolatry ;  frequently  making  feafts,  which  they  eat  in  honour 
 to  fome  unknown  beings,  who,  they  fuppofe,  fpeak  to  them 
 in  dreams ;  promifing  them  fuccefs  in  hunting,  and  other  af- 
 fairs, in  cafe  they  will  facrifice  to  them.  They  oftentimes 
 alfo  offer  their  facrifices  to  the  fpirits  of  the  dead  ;  who, 
 they  fuppofe,  ftand  in  need  of  favours  from  the  living,  and 
 yet  are  in  fuch  a  ftate  as  that  they  can  well  reward  all  the  of- 
 fices of  kindnefs  that  are  fliewn  them.  And  they  impute  all 
 theip  calamities  to  the  negleft  of  thefe  facrifices. 
 
 Furthermore, 
 
504  A  N     A  P  P  E  N  D  I  X. 
 
 Furthermore,  they  are  much  awed  by  thofe  among  thcin-' 
 felves,  who  are  called  powwows,  who  are  fuppofed  to  have 
 a  power  of  inchanting,  or  poifoning  them  to  death,  or  at 
 lead  in  a  very  diftrcfling  manner.  And  they  apprehend  it 
 would  be  their  fad  fate  to  be  thus  inchanted,  in  cafe  they 
 fhould  become  Chriftians. 
 
 Laftly,  The  manner  of  their  living  is  likewife  a  great  dif- 
 advantage  to  the  defign  of  their  being  Chriftianized.  They 
 are  ahnoft  continually  roving  from  place  to  place  ;  and  it  is 
 but  rare,  that  an  opportunity  can  be  had  with  fome  of  them 
 for  their  inftruclion.  There  is  fcarce  any  time  of  the  year, 
 wherein  the  men  can  be  found  generally  at  home,  except  a- 
 bout  fix  weeks  before,  and  in,  the  feafon  of  planting  their 
 corn,  and  about  two  months  in  the  latter  part  of  fummer, 
 from  the  time  tliey  begin  to  roaft  their  corn,  until  it  is  fit  to 
 gather  in. 
 
 As  to  the  hardp/ips  that  neceflarily  attend  a  miffion  among 
 them,  the  fatigues  of  frequent  journeying  in  the  wildernefs, 
 the  unpleafantnefs  of  a  mean  and  hard  way  of  living,  and  the 
 great  difficulty  of  addrefling  "  a  people  of  a  ftrange  language,'' 
 thefe  I  (hall,  at  prefent,  pafs  over  in  filence;  defigning  what 
 I  have  already  faid  of  difficulties  attending  this  work,  not  for 
 the  difcouragement  of  any,  but  rather  for  the  incitement  of 
 rf//,  who  "love  the  appearing  and  kingdom  of  Chrift,"  to 
 frequent  the  throne  of  grace  with  earneft  fupplications,  that 
 the  Heathen,  who  were  anciently  prornifed  to  Chrift  "  for 
 *'  his  inheritance,"  may  now  a^ually  zndfpeedily  be  brought 
 into  his  kingdom  of  grace,  and  made  heirs  of  immortal  glo* 
 ly. 1  am, 
 
 From  the  Forks  of  ^      ^''''> 
 Delaware  in  Pennfyl-    C  YoiiV  obedient,  humble  ferva}?t, 
 
 vania,  Nov.  5.  1744.   j  David  Brainerd. 
 
 P.  S.  It  fhould  have  been  obferved  in  the  preceding  ac- 
 G-Qunt,  that  although  the  number  of  Indians  in  the  place  I 
 vifited  on  Suiquahannah-river,  in  Oftober  lafl,  is  but  fmall, 
 yet  their  numbers  in  the  adjacent  places  are  very  confiderable ; 
 who,  it  is  hopeful,  might  be  brought  to  embrace  Chrillianity 
 by  the  example  of  others.  But  being  at  prefent  fomewhat 
 iTiOre  favage,  and  unacquainted  with  the  Englifh,  than  thefc 
 I  vifited,  I  thought  it  not  befl:  to  make  my  firll:  attempts  a- 
 mong  them;  hoping  I  might  hereafter  be  better  introduced 
 among  them  by  means  of  thefe. Sundry  of  the  neigh- 
 bouring fettlements  are  much  larger  than  this :  fo  that  there 
 are,  probably,  feveral  hundreds  of  the  Indians  not  many  miles 
 diftant.  D.  B. 
 
 FINIS. 
 
'if 
 
 S&^ 
 
 ^ 
 
 t'a't.' 
 
 ^1!^: 
 
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