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TRIP to the MOON. 
 
 Containing an Account of the 
 
 Island of NOIBLA. 
 
 Its Inhabitants, Religious and 
 Political Customs, &c. 
 
 i?y5/> HUMPHREY LUNATIC, Bart. 
 
 I am but mad North North-Weft ; ^uhen the Wind 
 hloi.v5 Southerly I ktioaJu-a Hanvkfrom a Hernftyaiu, 
 
 SHAfC£SR£AR. 
 
 V O L U M E L 
 The SECOND EDITIOjff 
 
 LONDON: 
 
 Printed for S. Crowder, in Pater-nofter-Row ; W. 
 NicoLL, and W. Bristow, in St. PauPs Church- 
 Yard; and C. Etherinoton, mTork, iy6^. 
 

 TJfZHEN Alexander *wa$ conjultei 
 concerning a Succejfor to his Crown 
 and Dignities^ he replied^ Let them he given 
 to the Worthiest ; onfuch a Principle^ if 
 any one can find a more eligible Patron for 
 the following Work^ the Author is willing 
 fo give up his own Choice of 
 
 ASHLEY COWPER, %j 
 
I 
 
A Trip to the MOON. 
 
 CHAP. I. 
 
 Containing a floor t Account of Sir Hum- 
 PHR^Y^s Predecejfors^ from the firfi Ba- 
 ronet of his Family. 
 
 r-"!-^ HOUGH the following Piece is 
 not of a Biographical Nature, 
 the Author thinks it neceflary 
 to give fomefhort Account of himielf and 
 his Family, that thereby forming a Kind 
 of Acquaintance with his Readers, they 
 may purfue their Journey togetlier thro* 
 the Lunar World with more Cordia- 
 lity and Pleafure. 
 
 It is well known by thofe v/ho have 
 Skill in Heraldry, that the Lunatics/a2W 
 I'^en a ccvjiderahlc Family^ ever fine e Eng- 
 
 A LAND 
 
[ 2 ] 
 
 LAND WAS England ♦, they have occa- 
 fionally been at the Helm of State ; they 
 have nodded upon Wooll-Packs in Lavm 
 Sleeves -, they have difpenfed Law from 
 vmder Voluminous Wigs; they have ra- 
 vaged Nations with Armies, and plowed 
 the Deep with Fleets ^ in fhort, they have 
 filled every Station in Life, from Princes 
 to Coblers; from Ducheifes to Cham- 
 bermaids : To make a complete De- 
 tail of Genealogical Particulars, would 
 be, a Work of infufferable Prolixity and 
 Oftentation •, wherefore the Author 
 will only revert to his Great Grandfather, 
 the firft Baronet of his Part of the Fa>- 
 mily j and proceed from him in a direct 
 Line, without Regard to feveral other di- 
 flinc-uiHied collateral Branches. 
 
 Whimsical Lunatic, Efq; after- 
 wards Sir Whimsical, diftinguilhed 
 himfelf much by his Zeal in Favour of 
 Royalty, at that Critical Period when the 
 
 Re- 
 
[ 3 '] 
 
 Republican Party made fuch fevere At* 
 tacks upon the weak and unfortunate 
 First Charles; nor did he, like the 
 mercenary (laves of Intereft, attach him- 
 felf, till Rebellion had fo far gained the 
 Afcendant, that Hope was fluttering on 
 its lafl Wing-, not Persian like, a Wor- 
 fliipper of the rifmg, but a faithful fol- 
 lower of the fetting Sun ; purfuing his 
 Beams even into the profound Darknefs 
 that enfucd, with a Spirit truly heroic he 
 join'd the general Wreck, which depriv'd 
 the Monarch of his Life, and himRlf, 
 among many others, of his Eilate. 
 
 Thus reduced, for fome Time he com- 
 forted himfelfwith the Opinion of Cato; 
 that it is a neceffary Compliment in 
 every good Citizen to join the Ruin of 
 his Country : Hov/ever, Want of Mo- 
 ney, which generally gives Time for Re- 
 flection, and adds Force to it, foon k-d 
 him to entertain a difil^icnt Notion of 
 A 2 the 
 
[ 4 ] 
 
 the prevailing Party, through the Op- 
 tics of Neceflity frefh Notions of Free- 
 dom entered his ever adtive Brain-, Non- 
 refiftance and PalTive Obedience, his 
 darling Principles, vanifhed like Mifts 
 before the Sun, and a new Kind of Pa- 
 triotifm fo enflamed him, that he com- 
 menced one of thofe public-fpirited Ora- 
 tors, fince difgraced by the Title of Fa- 
 natic Preachers. 
 
 Being pofleiTed of great Volubility,, 
 Force of Expreffion, and Luxuriance of 
 Fancy, he loon became highly diftin- 
 guifhed in his New Capacity; and as 
 Converts are generally mofl zealous 
 againfl the Caufe they have forfaken, he. 
 was efteemed fo valuable an Acquifition, 
 that Cromwell caufed his Eftate to be 
 reftored, and had him elected a Member 
 of his firft Parliament ; in which Situ- 
 ation he made a very confiderable Fi- 
 gure ; No one in the Debates com- 
 
 mandcd 
 
t 5 3 
 
 manded more Attention and Rerpe61:. 
 Hence he might have been eminently 
 advanced in the State ; but, like a true 
 Lunatic, being fond of Oppofition, 
 and difdaining to run with the Stream 
 long, he began to find Fault with the 
 Condu<5l of Public Affairs ; openly de- 
 claring, that the Plan of Plato's Re- 
 public, with fome Alterations and 
 Amendments of his own, would be the 
 only fure Foundation for National Hap- 
 pinefs. 
 
 His Objedions to almoft every Mea- 
 sure propofed, rendered him remarkably 
 obnoxious within Doors, but made him 
 popular without; however, as in thofe 
 days the Vox Populi was not efteemed 
 the Vox Dei, he reaped no other Advan- 
 tage from his hardy and anxious Endea- 
 vours, but fome faint Gales of whifpered 
 Applaufe-, for public Acclamations in 
 Favour of laborious Patriots, were not 
 A 3 then 
 
L ^ ] 
 
 then fo common or fo fafe as they have 
 been fince. 
 
 Plumed up and animated with the Ap- 
 probation of many as dilcontented as 
 himlelf, he gave full Scope to his Zeal, 
 without apparently waking the Dragon 
 Pov/er from his Slumbers, as his Keepers 
 fhrewdly forefaw that to he in Wait for 
 hot-brained Politicians is the furefl Me- 
 thod of circumventing them: And even 
 fo it happened with the illuftrious Perfon- 
 agehere fpoken of, who grew fo extremely 
 violent upon the Motion for conflituting 
 Cromwell Lord Protector, which he 
 faid was only a fofterName for Tyrant, 
 that his Fury knew no Bounds, but hur- 
 ried him to fuch Lengths of general and 
 perfonal Refledion, that he was not only 
 expelled the Ploufe as a feditious Mem- 
 ber, but was alfo put under legal Profe- 
 cution, and amerced with fo heavy a Fine 
 for Defamation, that his Eftate could 
 
 flretch 
 
C 7 ] 
 
 fhretch little farther tlian to fave him 
 from a Prifon. 
 
 Thus, once again funk into the unho- 
 fpitable and chilling Shade of Fortune, 
 he had no Comfort left but the Upright- 
 nefs of his own Heart, and fome diftant 
 Hopes that Matters might yet take a 
 more favourable Turn ; which however 
 did not happen till fome Ihort Time be- 
 fore Cromwell's Deceafe; when, a rich 
 Relation dying, he obtained a Legacy 
 that redeemed his Eftate, and enabled 
 him to appear in public with Refpe6b; 
 for Refpedt ufually follows the Circum- 
 flances, and not the Qualifications of a 
 Man. 
 
 At this Period, as if his Life had not 
 been already fufiiciently difturbed, he 
 took it into his Head to marry a fecond 
 Wife, his own Houfe-keeper; who being 
 raifed to the Degree of Miftrefs, pofTef- 
 
 Xed 
 
[ s ] 
 
 fed of Yonth without Prudenc=e, and 
 Beauty v/ithout Underfl;anding,> made 
 fuch large Strides to arbitrary Power, 
 that all her Hufband's Republican 
 Principles could not ftem the Torrent of 
 her Pride and Extravagance. This do- 
 meftic Concern kept him from meddling 
 any further in Politics, than addrelTing 
 his Life and Fortune, among the other 
 -good People of England, to Richard 
 Cromwell, fome Years Poverty having 
 made him' approve of the Office of Pro- 
 tector. However, upon hearing of 
 Charles's i\pproach, his Heart took 
 fuch aYearhing towards the lawful Prince, 
 and indefeafible hereditary Right flowed 
 back upon him in fuch a Tide of Loyal- 
 ty, that he was one of the foremofl to 
 transfer Allegiance from Richard to 
 Charles ; irt. Acknowledgment of which 
 forward Zeal that good-humour*d, hberal 
 Monarch created him a Baronet ^ inti- 
 mating, at the fame Time, aDefign,when 
 
 Af- 
 
[ 9 -3 
 
 Affairs were entirely fettled, of extending 
 his Royal Bounty in a Manner more wor- 
 thy his great Defervings. 
 
 But, alas ! how vain, tranfitory, and de- 
 lufive are human Expe61:ations ? How 
 fpeedily does the ever- gaping Grave 
 fwallow up the air-built Fabrics of Ima- 
 gination ? Some few Nights after his 
 new Dignity had been conferred upon ^' 
 him, the Baronet, while his heart was 
 expanding with Joy at his Country's Fe- 
 licity, facrificed fo profufely at the Shrine 
 ofBAccHus, and fwallowedfo many Bum- 
 pers for the Public Good, that, falling 
 afiecp among fome as much intoxicated 
 as himfelf, he was, as is fuppofed, flifled, 
 being, found dead in his Chair by a Wai- 
 ter. Thus — oh fatal and irreparable 
 Chance! — died that great Man, who ex- 
 pired, as he had lived, in the Caufe of old 
 England, a real and uniform Luna- 
 tic. 
 
 As 
 
I »o 3 
 
 As Impartiality is the very EfTence of 
 Hiiiory, it fliali be moil carefully prefer- 
 ved upon this Occaiion-, wherefore, tho' 
 Nature may plead to draw a Veil over 
 the Failings of Anceilors, yet our Au- 
 thor cannot help> acknowledging that 
 Sir Whimsical's SuccelTor deviated con- 
 fiderably from the Dignity of his Name 
 and Family-, for notwithftandihg he had 
 fo bright an Example before him, to 
 light him on his V/ay like another Ar- 
 cadian Star, and came to his Eilate in 
 a buftling Time, yet did he meanly be- 
 take himfelf to the Retirement of a Coun- 
 try Life, making the Improvement of his 
 Fortune, the comfortable Settlement of 
 his Tenants, a plentiful Houfe, and half 
 a Dozen fociable Neighbours, his chief 
 Pleafure : However, this phlegmatic 
 Cloud, as I may call him, upon the Glory 
 of the Lunatics, complaifantly retired 
 in feven or eight Years, and made Way for 
 -Sir Humphrey, Father of the Author, 
 
 Here 
 
[ II ] 
 
 Here Family-Splendor again began to 
 break forth ^ the young Baronet firft 
 diilingnillied himfelf eminently upon the 
 famous Bill of Exclufion fo boldly framed 
 againft James Duke of York, after- 
 wards King. During the fhort Reign of 
 that obftinate Prince, he alternately fup- 
 ported Royal Prerogative and popular 
 Liberty J fo, being of both Sides, reaped 
 Advantage from neither. He was not in 
 the Allbciation for inviting the Prince of 
 Orange, yet joined him foon after his 
 Arrival ; notwithftanding which he was 
 always one of the foremoft to cramp that 
 Monarch in the Operations of Govern- 
 ment. TheWar of Queen Anne he vehe- 
 mently declared againft •, and, when the 
 War was ended, was as vehement againft 
 the Peace ot Utrecht ; juft after which 
 he died, expiring with this Wifti, that the 
 Authors oifuch a Peace might never en- 
 joy Peace, In fliort, he was deeply con- 
 cerned in the political Occurrences of 
 
 five- 
 
[ 12 ] 
 
 five-and-thirty Years, fully inheriting the 
 glorious Spirit of Oppofition, and exert- 
 ing it with fuch Effed, that he was the 
 main Caufe of removing a Dozen Mini- 
 fters of State, mod of whom he thought 
 honed till in Office ; but became con- 
 vinced at laft, by repeated Experience, 
 that if at any Time Place-Hunters do 
 a6l upon juft Principles and are uncor- 
 rupt, their Virtue can only be compared 
 to that of thofe Women, who are chafle 
 for vvant of Temptation or Opportunity. 
 
 Our Author was, at the Time of his 
 Father's Deceafe, but twelve Years old; 
 and, by hisWill, put under the Guardian- 
 fhip of a Perfon, who had itrid Charge to 
 infpire him with the Love of fome occult 
 Science which might render him famous: 
 Accordingly, his Genius being confulted, 
 Aftronomy was fixed upon, in which he 
 made an aftonifhingProgrefs ; but as he is 
 Hill alive, and an Ador on this great Stage 
 
 of 
 
C 13 ] 
 
 of Life, we fhall leave his Charader and 
 Portrait to a future Day, that we may not 
 incur the Charge of Flattery or Malice, 
 by pointing out Beauties or Defeds. 
 
 Be it fufficient then to remark, that 
 the prefent Sir Humphrey, tho' inti- 
 mately acquainted with all Political Con- 
 cerns, tho' a faithful Reprefentative of 
 his Conftituents, yet has taken a different 
 Method to the immortalizing liis Name, 
 and embalming it for Poflerity ; viewing 
 terreftrial Concerns, where fcarce any 
 Thing but Self-Love, and its I'rain of 
 fordid Confequences, prevails, but as fe- 
 condary Points of Care to a wife Man, 
 He has ftudioufly traverfed the whole 
 Planetary Syftem; andtho'fome worldly 
 Grubs may look on him as a mere Star- 
 gazer, the following Account of his 
 Trip to the Moon will fhow that he 
 deferves as exalted a Place in the Rolls 
 of Fame, as any Lunatic that ever 
 
 made 
 
I 14 ] 
 
 hiade a Figure in Life ; having this Ad^ 
 vantage over his PredecefTors of confpi- 
 CLious Memory, that his Fame is, in the 
 humbleil View, founded upon innocent,' 
 not deilrudlive Principles -, upon univer- 
 fal, wondrous Philofophical Harmony, 
 not violent, deflrudlive Political DifTen- 
 fion. 
 
 In this Senfe he has confented to fub- 
 mit himfelf and the following Journal to 
 public Opinion •, perfuaded that however 
 peculiar the Things he is to relate may 
 appear, daily Experience proves they are 
 not lefs true for being ilrange •, and he 
 even flatters himfelf that they may not 
 be lefs entertaining becaufe derived from 
 a Country and People feldom mentioned 
 in our World ; for it is a Country much 
 to be admired, and a People, in many 
 Points, highly deferving Imitation." 
 
 CHAR 
 
r 15 ] 
 
 CHAR IL 
 
 Sir H u M p H R E y'j 7? anjlation to the Mo o N ; 
 ' his Reception in the IJland of Noibla ; 
 
 Ceremony at the Notlam -, and his En- 
 
 try into the Cily cf Nodnol. 
 
 "Avlng always attentively bufied my- 
 felf in the Contemplation of thole 
 innumerable and wonderfuiBodieSjwhich 
 catching Light from the Sun, when hs 
 defcehds below our Hemifpherey adorn 
 the Firmament with golden Specks, for 
 fuch they feem to unaiiiiled mortal Eyes ; 
 and being alv/ays extremely curious to i . 
 examine whatever related to thofe Bo- 
 dies, I form'd great Expedations from 
 a Piece which once fell into my Hands, 
 called Berghrac's Voyage to the 
 Moon; the Title indeed gave me parti- 
 cular Plealiire, as I hoped to find fome- 
 what very extraordinary in the Con- 
 tents ; vet v/a5 1 vaillv deceived, for the/ 
 
 tiiere 
 
[ i6 ] 
 
 there are ftrong Marks of Genius in that 
 Produ6lion, upon the whole I could dif- 
 cover nothing very interefling ; however 
 the Thought of ajouraey to the Lunar 
 World ftruck very deep, and all my 
 Calculations, all my Wifhes, were ever 
 after afTiduoufly employed on the effect- 
 ing fuch a Jaunt J till at laft, without any 
 apparent Merit of mine, it happened in 
 the following Manner. 
 
 The latter End of laft May, taking a 
 nightly Walk of Contemplation, I afcend- 
 ed a green Hill of confiderable Height, 
 whofe Top was fhaded with Trees, from 
 whence, in awful Silence, broke only by 
 lulhng Notes from the plaintive Nightin- 
 gale, I beheld, below me, a fpacious Vale, 
 interfedted by the flow an^ {lately Stream 
 of a well-known River, fldrted by a 
 venerable Grove, whofe Branches, as 
 Shakespear has it, were filvered by the 
 Moo^SHi-NE^s walry Beams-, that Planet 
 
 havins: 
 
[ t? ] "^ 
 
 having then filled its Orb with mod: un- 
 iifual Lviflre, wrapped up in pleafing 
 Melancholy, Slumber infenfibly fell up- 
 on me, and from thence I dropp'd into a 
 profound Sleep. 
 
 How long this foft Semblance of Death 
 remained upon me I cannot fay; but ima- 
 gine. Reader, if thou canft, my Surprize,- 
 and let me add fome Terror aifo, when, 
 upon waking, I found myfelf feated m 
 a Kind of Triumphal Car, furrounded 
 by a great Number of human Figures,- 
 not one of which I had the lead Idea of; 
 yet all fhewing many Marks of Refpedl, 
 and murmuring out an extraordinary 
 Kind of Joy. My Aftoniiliment: being 
 too vifible for Difguife, a Perfon of vene- 
 rable Afpe6t addrefTed me as follov/s, 
 mod profound Attention being given by 
 the lurrounding Crowd, who feemed 
 to Jiave much more Pleafure in the Prac- 
 
 U tice 
 
[ i8 ] 
 
 tice of good Manners, than many of our 
 polite Aflembiies : 
 
 Son of Earth, faid he, fear not, thou 
 art in the Regions of Safety : Tendernefs 
 and HofpitaHty ever fmile here : Envy 
 never fhewed her fnaky Locks, nor Slan- 
 der her envenom'd Tongue, nor Cruelty 
 her blood-ftain'd Sword, in thefe Realms 
 of foft Repofe ; rejoice therefore that thou 
 art fo highly favoured as to have an Op- 
 portunity of gratifying that Curiofity 
 which has fo long poffefTed thee ; it was 
 laudably ambitious, and flirred up to 
 raife thee above the common Race of 
 Men. Receive from me, in Behalf of all 
 prefent, and of a much greater Number 
 whom we reprefent, a zealous and unaf- 
 fe6led Welcome; may every Thing thou 
 meet'ft, during thy Stay amongft us, con- 
 tribute to thy Information and Pleafure-, 
 it fhall be our Care to confult and to 
 
 promote 
 
[ '9 ] 
 
 promote both : May our Endeavours be 
 luccersful to thy Approbation. 
 
 Here, turning round, and repeating to 
 the Multitude a few Words which I did 
 not underftand, they again made Obei- 
 fance. Having by this Time colleded 
 Confidence, I replied. 
 
 Venerable Sage, whom yet I know 
 not either in Perfon or Dignity, how fhall 
 I fidy acknowledge this moil ho'pitable 
 Salutation? How pay the due Refjed to 
 fuch unmerited Kindnefs? Yet let it not 
 fland as a Doubt of that Cordiality you 
 profefs, to afk where I am, and by what 
 Means I came hither, both being utterly 
 unknown to me. You, Sir, by your Lan- 
 guage and Appearance, are English •, yet 
 many I lee around you fo difierent from 
 what I have ever feen before, that I am 
 ahiioft perluaded to believe fome fuper- 
 natural Means have removed me fio.n 
 B 2 . my 
 
[ 20 ! 
 
 fny native Land ; befides, however con^ 
 fpicuous Britain may be in the Rolls 
 of Fame, the Character you give of this 
 untainted Region far furpafles her proud- 
 eft Boaft ; wherefore, good Sir, you 
 cannot be difpleafed if I inquire where, 
 and among whom I am at prefent pla- 
 ced. 
 
 Thy Defire, my Son, returns he, is na- 
 tural, and that thou may'il not be kept 
 longer in Sulpence, know that what thou 
 haft fo long earneftly wiftied, is at length 
 come to pafs •, thou art now within the 
 Limits of the Lunar World ; the im- 
 perceptible Method of thy Conveyance 
 I cannot explain to thy Comprehenfion ; 
 let it fuffice to fay that fome Rays of At- 
 tradion, fent down from the Mount of 
 Obiervation, a Spot which from Earth 
 appears to be the Nofe of the Man in 
 the Moon, drew thee from the Place 
 where thou lay'ft afleep^ which powerful 
 
 Ope- 
 
[ 21 ] 
 
 Operation was not a little facilitated by 
 fome fympathetic Pamphlets thou hadft 
 in thy Pockets, Pieces originally planned 
 in a certain Province of this Lunar 
 World, and thence infpired into the 
 nioon-Jlruck Authors of them. Upon this 
 Information examining my Pockets, I 
 found three of Whitefield's Sermons, 
 half a Dozen North-Britons, and as 
 many Schemes for paying off the Na- 
 tional Debt, by Jacob Henriques, 
 
 At this Point of Time my Host, as I 
 may call my fage Welcomer, diredled a 
 Kind of ProcefTion, which tho' not grand, 
 nor very regular, appeared to be calcula- 
 ted as a high Compliment to me \ my 
 Car of State was drawn by fix Animals, 
 two of a Sort, with a Youth of about fif- 
 teen leading each; they were Elephants 
 Horses, and I ions, all remarkable in 
 their Kinds ^ the Elephants were of 
 thofe which fo remarkably contributed to 
 B 3 Vidory 
 
[ 22 ] 
 
 Victory in a Battle between the Romans 
 and Pyrrhus ; the Horfes were Buce- 
 phalus, and that on which Curtius 
 leap'd into the gaping Giilph for the 
 Good of his Country; and as to the 
 Lions, one of thole that let Daniel pafs 
 unmolefted, was paired with him that 
 gratefully remembered the Slave who 
 freed his Foot from a tormenting Thorn. 
 Thefe, as vv^ell as many extraordinary 
 Creatures of the Human Species, had 
 been tranflated to the Moon, and are 
 there held in great Regard. 
 
 I was fhaded by a thin filken Canopy, 
 held over me with great Exa6lnefs by fix 
 Eagles of the Sun, their Plumes fhining 
 like his Beams, whofe Wings kept Pace 
 with the Car, and fanned the Breezes 
 very agreeably around me. A Band of 
 Mufic preceded the Car, not much unlike 
 that Kind of rude Harmony with which 
 v/e ^re told the Antients faluted the 
 
 Moon 
 
[ 23 ] 
 
 Moon in an Eclipfe, fuppofmg her to be 
 at that Time in Labour. 
 
 As we approached a Gate, which I per- 
 ceived led into the City, we (lopped 
 before a beautiful Arbor, formed by a 
 Circle of moft pleafing correfpondent 
 Trees ; within this Arbor flood a fmall 
 neat Building, which inclofed a Well call- 
 ed the NoTLAM, or Spring of Purifi- 
 cation : I was led towards it, being told 
 that I was to undergo a Ceremony necef- 
 fary to every Sublunary Being before his 
 Admiflion into the City. 
 
 On each Side the Well flood £\x beau- 
 tiful Virgins in flov/ing Robes of Azure, 
 each holding in her Hand fomething like 
 a Cenfer of tranfparent Chryflal : On my 
 Entrance one of them, with the mofl 
 courteous Solemnity, flowly approached 
 me, and, according to my Conductor's 
 Interpretation, fpoke thus : 
 
 Mafft 
 
r 24 1 
 
 Mafjlthou^ earth-horn Mortal^ hy drink- 
 ing of this holy Springs become as cold to Paf- 
 Jion, and as pure to Virtue^ as its deef and 
 lucid Stream. Having ended, and pre- 
 fented me the Water, llie retired \ when 
 a fecond came forward, and fprinkling 
 my Hands, faid, May thefe be the Inftru- 
 ments of Induftry^ and not of Violence. A 
 third, my Bread being bared, fprinkled 
 it, with thefe Words : May Content ever 
 dwell her e^ and focial Hoppinefs be the reign- 
 ing Principle. A fourth bedewed my 
 Head, faying. As Heaven's kindly Rain 
 raifes and cherifJoes the vegetable World., fo 
 may thefe confecrated Drops here bring forth 
 the Fruits of Wifdom and Virtue. 
 
 So much of the Ceremony being over, 
 the Twelve Virgins circling round me, 
 dancing all the Time with very odd Ge- 
 ftures, and finging a Hymn of Exulta- 
 tion, gave m.e fo plentiful an Ablution, 
 that I began to be weary. Having finilh- 
 
 ed 
 
[ 25 ] 
 
 cd thefe Rites, they all proflrated thein- 
 felves before me, and then retired to their 
 Places on each Side the Well. 
 
 Senfible of the Pains they had taken, 
 and forgetting where I was, I intended to 
 have made a pecuniary Acknowledge- 
 ment ; but my Host perceiving the De- 
 fign. Hold, Son of Earth, fays he, the 
 Works of Religion and Hofpitality are 
 not fold here; nor have we any Coin but 
 focial Intercourfe and mutual Regard; 
 did I not tell thee we had no Envy or Dif- 
 cord among us, and after that could'fl 
 thou imagine any Regard would be paid 
 to fuch Drofs as Gold ? Did we want to 
 introduce Flames among our Fields, 
 Dearth among our Cattle, DifTenfions 
 among our Families, Bloodflied into our 
 Cities, Difeafes into our Bodies, and pe- 
 ftilential PafTions into our Minds, that 
 inflammatory Trafh would foon effed: our 
 irrational and vicious Purpofes. Yet, 
 
 hold. 
 
[ 26 ] 
 
 hold, one pleafing and ufeful Purpofe the 
 Sight of it may ferve-, lend me what thou 
 haft, that, difplaying it to public View, 
 and briefly explaining its pernicious Ef- 
 fedls, I may render it, if polTible, ftill 
 more contemptible and hateful to my 
 Brethren of this World. 
 
 Here I gave him my Purfe, from 
 whence taking fome Pieces of Gold, he 
 held them in each Hand, and addrefled 
 the Multitude in the following Manner, 
 as he afterwards explained it to me : _ 
 
 Behold, my Friends and Brothers of 
 the Island of Noi el a, the moft favour- 
 ed Spot of all this Lunar World, be- 
 hold, ye Sons of natural and untainted 
 Liberty, the Fiend who, having got Foot- 
 ing on the Terreftrial Globe, rules every 
 Government, and every Individual, of all 
 Sexes, Ages, and Degrees; for the Sake 
 of Bits like thefe, dug, hy half -fed Slaves^ 
 •^ . out 
 
[ 27 ] 
 
 out of the Bowels of the Earth, to pam- 
 per Pride and Luxury -, thoufands and 
 ten Thoufands march into the bloody- 
 Field of War, hung round with the mofl 
 defl:ru6live Weapons of Cruelty, to muti- 
 late and butcher their Fellow-Creatures ; 
 for thefe their Clergy pray ; their Law- 
 yers wrangle ; their Phyficians kill : For 
 thefe Fathers and their Sons, Mothers 
 and their Daughters, Brethren and Sif- 
 ters, run into the mod uncharitable Dif- 
 fenfions : Gilded with thefe. Vice claims 
 Refpe6l, while thread- bare Virtue (lands 
 fliiv'ring and helplefs at the unhofpitable 
 Doors of Luxury and Pride. 
 
 ■ For thefe Parents match their Chil- 
 dren without the leail Regard to mutual 
 Affeclion \ hence fplendid Mifery glares 
 in fo many Places, while calm Content 
 flies their mercenary Dwelhngs. — Would 
 you perfuade-, here lies the moil power- 
 ful Eloquence : — Vv''ouId you prove the 
 
 Stea- 
 
[ 28 ] 
 
 Steadinefs of a profefllng Patriot ; here 
 
 is the Touch-ftone of intrinfic Worth:— 
 
 Would you fmooth the Wrinkles of Age, 
 
 or proportion and harmonize Deformity; 
 
 here is the necromantic Beautifier that 
 
 can work fuch Miracles ; and that too 
 
 amongft Animals which boafb themfelves 
 
 of Rationality, and yet are fo wrapp'd up 
 
 in Infatuation, that, while they mofl cau- 
 
 tioully avoid whatever might be hurtful 
 
 to the Body, devour, with infatiable and 
 
 voratious Appetites, this more dangerous 
 
 Poifon of the Mind. — Oh Reafon, where 
 
 is thy Power? Mount, mount for Shame 
 
 thy Throne, nor longer abdicate thy 
 
 Judgment-Seat, left ufurping PafTions 
 
 create univerfal and incurable Confufion. 
 
 How, how fhould we rejoice, my Bre- 
 thren, that, free from the fatal Influence 
 of this Bane to focial Happinei's, no Blood 
 ftains our Fields ; no Fears fliake our 
 Peaces that Religion is Gratitude, not 
 
 In- 
 
C ^9 ] 
 
 !nterefl:; that Inclination, moderated by 
 Prudence, joins every Couple here; that 
 Sons, when arrived to Difcretion, enjoy 
 equal Advantages with their Fathers, 
 whom therefore they never wifh to bury, 
 that fuch Failings as we have amongft 
 us cannot either be hid or rendered lefs 
 lliameful by ibch Tinfel Covering -, that 
 here no Tongue will move, no Virgin , 
 yield her Honour for mercenary Bribes! 
 Is not this, my Friends, a copious Field 
 for Exultation ? A beautiful and folid Ba- 
 fis for juft Self-efleem and Congratula- 
 tion? Let Avarice glote upon its iVining 
 Heaps •, let Glory nod under her blood- 
 ftained Plumage; let Ambition fwell with 
 fading Flonours, while we, oh Noi- 
 blanIi Willi no greater Happinefs than 
 an uninterrupted PofleiTion of our virtu- 
 ous Mediocrity -, which we do, and ever 
 muft, efteem an inexhauftible Source of 
 real and invariable Felicity. 
 
 This 
 
[ 30 ] 
 
 This Oration, pronounced with great 
 Senfibiiity of Expreflion, harmonious Ca- 
 dence of Voice, and much Grace of Ac- 
 tion, gained univerfal Applaufe from the 
 Crowd : Nor could it fail, for tho' deli- 
 vered to them in a Language which I did 
 not underftand, yet the Manner of it 
 flruck my Attention deeply. Being end-, 
 ed, we again moved on, and in a few Mi- 
 nutes entered the City Gate. 
 
 CHAP. III. 
 
 Is conducted to the Requecex. 1"he Noi- 
 BLAN Laws\ their Chief Magiftr ate ^ the 
 Manner of his Ek^fion^ and his executive 
 Power defcrihed\ their Marriages \ the 
 Management and Education of their 
 Touth^ &c. 
 
 HAVING entered the City, we were 
 met by a confiderable Number of 
 Perfons who joined our ProcelTion, which 
 moved onwards to a fpacious Square, 
 
 wherein 
 
[ 31 1 
 
 wherein flood a very large Building of or- 
 bicular Form, into which I was conduced. 
 My Host was the only one who entered 
 the Great Hall with me-, when, defiring 
 me to recline myfelf on a Couch while he 
 took Place on another, he proceeded 
 thus : I doubt not, Son of Earth, but 
 many Circumflances you will meet with 
 in this Aresal, orCiTY of Nodnol, the 
 Capital of Noibla, will appear pecu- 
 liarly flrange, perhaps inconfiftent; but I 
 will endeavour to explain and reconcile 
 the mofl material as they occur. 
 
 This Building we are now in is call'd 
 the Requecex, or House of Justice, 
 where Law is difpenfed, and all Matters 
 of Debate, which may arife in this City, 
 or the Diftrid under its Jurifdiv!ilion, are 
 decided •, but, that you may better under- 
 lland this Part of the political Conflitu- 
 tion, I mull fl^etch out a general View of 
 the whole. 
 
 Know 
 
i: 32 ] 
 
 Know then that this Ifland of Noibla 
 is divided into one hundred Seitnuocs, 
 or Diftrids, each under a City, and each 
 City under the Guidance of one Magi- 
 ftrate, called the Namr ED ALjwho fits one 
 day every To I RT A, or Week, for adjuft- 
 ing fuch Complaints as nnay come before 
 him. His Diredion is the Body of Laws, 
 drawn up in a plain concife Stile, with- 
 out the Intricacy and Incumbrance of 
 multiplied Claufes, which ferve only to 
 explain away the Senfe, and diminifh the 
 Force of the original Defign. If at any 
 Time he fhould be in Doubt, he has 
 Power to fummon a Council of Citizens, 
 not exceeding twenty in Number, to al- 
 fifl him with their Opinions, and, from a 
 Decree founded on fuch Precaution, there 
 is no Appeal; but in Cafe the Namredal 
 gives Judgment of himfelf, to the Dif- 
 fatisfadion of any Party, that Party may 
 claim a frefh Trial, and then Arbitrators 
 are fixed on in the following Manner : 
 
 The 
 
[ 33 ] 
 
 The Appellant chufes ten Citizens, 
 and the Judge as many, thcle vote fix, 
 three on each Side, to determine the 
 Caufe-, if they reverfe the former Decree, 
 and impute it to a mere Error in Judge- 
 ment, the Namredal is difpiaced as in- 
 capable •, but, if they impute it to Parti- 
 ality, he is then deprived of all his Rights 
 as a Citizen, and banifhed to the dreary 
 Mountains of Neroma. This Check 
 upon Magifterial Authority does not 
 abridge the Power, the' it prevents Op- 
 preflion j for the Magiftrate is not obliged 
 to give his Opinion fingly, but ir.ay fheir 
 ter himfelf under the Advice of a Coun- 
 cil, if he is in Doubt. 
 
 Once every Ray AMON, or Year, all the 
 Namredals of the Island meet in this 
 Reqitecex, and confider the general 
 State of the Inhabitants ; whatever De- 
 feds appear are reigula'ted by them-, after 
 wiiich fix Citizens from each Dlilridl 
 
 C enter 
 
'Z 34 ] 
 
 writer into a minute Inquiry of every 
 Namredal's Adminiflration during his 
 Year, and as they determine give him an 
 honorary Certificate, or render him inca- 
 pable of that Dignity ever after ; which 
 indeed is the only OfRce of Pre-eminence 
 thro' the Island, all other Citizens be- 
 ing upon an equal Footing. Nor is the 
 Pod of Namredal in any Shape lucra- 
 tive, Honour and Refpedl being the only 
 Reward of his Labour -, — he hears with- 
 out Penfion, and before him each Indivi- 
 dual pleads his own Caufe without Paf- 
 fion or Malice-, his Judgments are put 
 in Force, if any Oppofition iliould be 
 made, which feldom happens, by any Ci- 
 tizen he fixes on, who thinks himfelf ho- 
 noured, not lelTened, by giving EiHcacy 
 to Law. Hence yo.u fee his Court is not 
 fcandalized by fuch blood-fucking Vul- 
 tures as thofe in your World, who, un- 
 der the Appellation of Oihcers of Juftice, 
 xommit the moft violent Depredations 
 
 ; and 
 
[ 3S 1 
 
 and unheard-of Cruelties upon thoie un- 
 happy Delinquents, who arc committed 
 to their mercilefs Talons. 
 
 J ufl when my fage Inflructor had gone 
 thus far, I Vv^as alarmed with the tolling 
 of a very large Bell, v/hich he told me 
 was the Elknitan, or BriLL of Noon ; 
 and then deHred me to look into the 
 Square on every Side, where I perceived 
 a confiderable Number of young PerfonS 
 fetting out a Kind of Tables. Expref- 
 fing a Curiofi.y to know what could be 
 the Meaning of this Preparation, he told 
 me that the City of Nodnol was divided 
 into twelve Sen i rats, or Wards, in 
 each of which was a Ruve n al, or Square, 
 wherein all the Inhabitants took their 
 Selbataza, or Noon-tide Meal toge- 
 ther, without Precedence or Diilindion: 
 This, continues he, creates a general In- 
 tercourfe, as they alternately go from 
 one Sen 1 RAT to the other; and as each 
 
 C 2 Perfon 
 
[ 36 ] 
 
 Perfon contributes proportionably to the 
 general Stock, conilitutional Equality 
 and a Sufficiency are thus daily renewed 
 and fupported. 
 
 By this Time, again looking into the 
 RuvEN AL, J iaw a prodigious Number of 
 Perfons, M^n on one Side and Women 
 on the other, fet down to a pleafmg Vari- 
 ety of Fruits and Herbage, dilpofed with 
 much Taiie and Neatnefs •, behind flood 
 Boys and Girls all cloathed in Green, (a 
 Colour which the Youth wear till they are 
 married) with fmall Veflels of Liquid, and 
 fome other Materials, which I could not 
 diftinguifh ; . thefe he told me were the 
 Children of thofe who fat at the Tables, 
 w^ho, from the Age of twelve to twenty, 
 acl as public Servitors, not only to create 
 Refped for their Parents, but for ail thofe 
 jDf fuperior Years. 
 
 * Here I inquired, if all prefent were 
 inarried, what became of thofe who were 
 
 fingle. 
 
E ?7 I 
 
 jSnglc; to which he anfwered, That Per- 
 fons in a State of Celibacy were not al- 
 lowed the Honour of fitting in the Ru- 
 VENAL, but remained in their own Habi- 
 tations, as do alio thofe married Couples 
 who are not bleiTed v/ith any Children. 
 
 You obferve, fays he, no fjperfluous; 
 Luxury in that Repaft-, no Food for 
 Sicknefs ; every third Day Flefh-Meat is 
 allowed, but in a fmall, limited Quanti- 
 ty, nor are there any high Sauce^s to flat- 
 ter palled Appetites; ail plain nutritious 
 Aliment; hence, among Noiblans, no 
 Fevers fend the Blood boiling thro' their 
 Veins; no Pahles fhake their Nerves; no 
 RheumatiUns cramp their Bones ; but, 
 free from.Diforder, by the gradual and in- 
 evitable Decnys of Age alone, they drop 
 into the Grave fpontaneoufly, as it were, 
 like mellow Fruit, without Fear and with- 
 out Pain. Nor is this Regularity, this 
 healthful Simplicity, all; Hated Times 
 C 3 of 
 
[ 3S I 
 
 of going to Bed and rifing, which are fig- 
 nlfied by Toll of Bell thro' the Island, 
 largely contribute to thefe falutary Ef- 
 feds. ' 
 
 How ditfcrent this from the Pra6lice 
 in your World, where Nature's Profufions 
 are exhauiled to pamper Luxury under 
 the fallacious Title of Tajle; where every 
 Seafon, eveiy Climate, every Stream, 
 and every Ocean, is ranfacked for the 
 endlcfs Cravings of reillefs Mortals •, 
 where one Flalf reft by Day, the other by- 
 Night; where Multitudes fcarce ever 
 fee that glorious Luminary the Sun, but 
 deftroy their Time and Conftitutions by 
 the Light of artificial Glimmerings, fit 
 only to delude Moths and Birds of Night. 
 
 Exercife and Labour aifo contribute 
 much to preferve and invigorate the Noi- 
 BLANS \ no Perfon is exempt from either ^ 
 and the Mailer of every Family is obliged 
 
 to 
 
[ 39 ]^ 
 to gi /c in a weekly Account how the feve- 
 ral Members of it have been employed; 
 if not to the gq^ated public Advantage, 
 he is cenfured as having failed in his 
 Duty, and an additional TafK is allotted 
 for the enfuing Week ; nor can a flilla- 
 cious Account be rendered, as allTranf- 
 adtions here are fo open, that the leafl 
 MilVeprefentation muft be dere6led, than 
 wliich nothing can be more fhameful. 
 
 To all this, continues he, T doubt not 
 you would fay that there is pretty Specu- 
 lation, fomething well imagined in fuch 
 a Plan of Policy; but then how can it be 
 reduced to Pradiice, without more for- 
 cible, nay, more terrifying Reflridlions 
 than any yet mentioned ? 
 
 The Reply to this plaufible Objecflion, 
 which I have ftated in order to your fur- 
 ther Satisfacftion and Information, is ob- 
 vious, concife, clear, andconclufive; our 
 
 Method 
 
[ 40 ] 
 
 Methdd of treatingChildren here is fo dif- 
 ferent from that in your World, that the 
 PalTions, tho' the fame in Nature, are fo 
 correfced as to become Sparks to animate 
 Virtue, not Flames to deilroy it. 
 
 To effedb this mod defirable Purpofe, 
 every Child, a few Days after its Birth, 
 is taken from the Mother, and given to 
 the Care of fome other Woman, who 
 may, by corredlive, conftitutional Quali- 
 fications, alter the Child's natural De- 
 feds ^ if he is born of a Mother cold and 
 phlegmatic in her Difpofiiion, he is put 
 to one of a fanguine Habit; and thus the 
 Contrail is obferved in other Cafes, fo 
 that a due Temparament is formed from 
 the earlieil. 
 
 The next Point of Care is not to in- 
 dulge any perverfe Humours, but, from 
 the Moment an Infant is capable of Di- 
 flindion, to check, by Means propor- 
 tioned 
 
[ 41 ] 
 
 tioned to its Feelings, every irregular, 
 fuperfiuous Craving •, hence that Unto- 
 wardnefs of Temper fo common amongft: 
 Youth, is timely fupprefTed ; hence are 
 they relieved from the innumerable 
 Cares, the endlefs felf-created Wants, 
 which mifapplied Indulgence gives Birth 
 to. — How grofiy then are they miftaken, 
 who call it Cruelty to curb tender Years ? 
 when nothing is more certain than that 
 one Defire granted creates another, till 
 the unhappy Favourite grows thoroughly 
 miferable either by having no more to 
 aflv, or by wifhing for fomewhat beyond 
 his Reach. From this Error in Parents 
 or Guardians, arifes the difagreeable Ne- 
 celTity of corporal Punifnment, which is 
 fo oddly adminiftered by fome, that thro' 
 Pafllon, not Judgment, they correal, and 
 thro' foolifh Tendernefs, not prudential 
 Regard, the very next Moment they ca- 
 refs anc^ footh the Child into a Forgetful- 
 nefs of its own Fault and their Corrrec- 
 
 tion. 
 
[ 42 ] 
 
 tion. TheAbfurdity of fuch Conduct needs 
 no Comment-, be it enough ihcn to re- 
 mark, that, to thoie who are ufed to obey 
 a V/ord, a Word v.iil ferve •, and how eafy, 
 how natural mull it be for them whofe 
 x\ppetites are kept within Bounds, even 
 without the AlTnlance of Reafon, to tem- 
 per their Paffions when they have not 
 only that fafe Guide, but Experience alfo 
 to afTnl them ? 
 
 At fcated Times Youth are fent to the 
 Snoissapans, or Public Schools ;_ 
 which, like all other Employments, are 
 filled up without Reward, except in Ex- 
 emption from other Offices and Avoca- 
 tions, which is a Privilege every Profef- 
 iion alio enjoys, fo that each Perfon 
 knows the Sphere he is to move in, and is 
 folely anfwerable for his Condudt in it. 
 
 At thefe Snoissapans the N o i c- 
 Tocs, or Mailers, inftru6l their Pupils in 
 the Principles of Morality, the Tenets of 
 
 Relieicn 
 
[ 43 ] 
 
 Religion, focial Duties, and the Laws of 
 the Island : By the three firll Branches 
 each Individual learns how to condu6b 
 himfelf in a private and Ibcial, and, by 
 the lad, in a political Capacity; from this 
 Method he becomes his own Divine, 
 his own Lawyer, his own Magi (Irate. 
 Having no Commerce with anv other 
 Country, or amongil ourfelves, the Arts 
 of Trade, and confequently Fraud, are 
 unknown with us ; as to what are called 
 in your World polite Accomplifliments, 
 they are looked upon to be ulldels, or ra- 
 ther pernicious Superfluities, fince they 
 not only engrofs much Time, but alfo 
 afford great Occaflon to Vanity. 
 
 Our Females are alfo fent to public 
 Seminaries, and early taught to know 
 and praftife tHofe Branches of Employ- 
 ment which fuit their tender Sex ; they 
 are carefully informed of the feveral Du- 
 ties which will be expe&ed from them 
 
 when 
 
[ 44 ] 
 
 when they enter the Marrkge State ^ 
 they are inflrucled to deipife Spirit with- 
 out Condud,- Wit without Prudence,- 
 and Beauty without Virtue ; they are alfo 
 taught to believe that Complaila^nce, Af- 
 fedion, and Induflry, are effential to her 
 that would obtain the amiable and exalt- 
 ed Chara6ler of a Good Wife; they are 
 taught, for the Public Good, to refign 
 their Children to the Care of others with- 
 out Reludtance, and to treat thofe which 
 are committed to their Charge with all fit 
 Attention and Tendernefs ; for every 
 Woman here, when her Condition an- 
 fwers and Occafion requires, is, by the 
 Law, a Nurfe to the Public •, by which 
 Inftitution there is a Kind of relative 
 Fondnefs diffufed thro' Society ; for, as 
 it often happens, one Woman may nurfe 
 for a Dozen or more Families, which 
 unites her intimately to themj at the 
 fame Time that thofe, who do the fame 
 endearing Oince for her, are joined in the 
 
 Knot 
 
I 45 ] 
 
 ICnot of Friendfhip : Thus a Kind of con- 
 nective Chain unites all the Inhabitants 
 ofNoiBLA. 
 
 Here I thanked my very kind Inftruc- 
 tor for explaining to me, in fo concife and 
 clear a Manner, Points of fuch Novelty 
 and good Senfe ; at the fame Time re- 
 quefling that, fmce we had gone tiuis far, 
 he would inform me how their Marriao-es 
 were negotiated, which Defire he obli- 
 gingly complied with. 
 
 No Male, fays he, is married till he is 
 full twenty-one Years of Age, nor Fe- 
 male till fhe is nineteen; from thofe Pe- 
 riods till the former reaches thirty-fix^ 
 and the latter thirty^ they unite them- 
 felves as proves agreeable •, but, if they 
 exceed the dated Time in Celibacy, they 
 are baniflicd as unworthy and unprofit- 
 able Members of Society, the Men to 
 the Mountains of Neroma, and the Wo- 
 men 
 
[ 46 ] 
 
 men to the Country of Omyrchal, or 
 the Valley of Weeping. 
 
 When a Man looks upon a Female, 
 who mull be at leaft five and not more 
 than ten Years under his Age, he is, 
 when the firft Opportunity otfers, to 
 make his Regard known with plain 
 unadorned Sincerity -, he is not, by any 
 Degree of Flattery ever fo diilant or de- 
 licate, to warp her Judgment, nor, by 
 any Prefents, to bribe her Inclination : 
 If llie is free from the Sollicitation of any 
 other. Hie may give him all modeil En- 
 couragement-, or, on the contrary, if (lie 
 happens to be engaged in any previous 
 Treaty, fhe is, without Referve, to let 
 him know it, in which Cafe he muft im- 
 mediately defril ; but if flie Ihould en- 
 deavour to keep him in Sufpence, and 
 extend her Converfation to others at the 
 fame Time, when it comes to be known 
 ,all the Parties fhe has encouraged have 
 
 an 
 
[ 47 ] 
 
 an equal Right to demand her-, nor can 
 fhe be married to any one, unlefs all the 
 relt renounce their Claim. 
 
 This makes Females cautious how they 
 commence Coquettes, and frees difmte- 
 relled Love from.the painful Anxieties of 
 Sufpence. On the other Side, if a Man 
 addrelles a Female, and afterwards de- 
 clines to marry her, he is baniilied •, and 
 any Couple who chance to be convided 
 of cohabiting before Marriage, are not 
 only rendered incapable of ever marry- 
 ing, but are alfo publickly ftigmatized, 
 which prevents ill-deligning Men from 
 making, or weak Women from belie- 
 ving, any Promifes tending to the Dif- 
 grace of one, and the Ruin of the other. 
 
 If a Couple are agreeable to each other, 
 and none of the above-mentioned Impe- 
 diments keep them afunder,theMan firfl, 
 in Point of Refped:, mentions it to his 
 
 own 
 
[ 48 ] 
 
 own Parents, and then to the Woman's ; 
 both Sides, as mutual confent is all that 
 is required, meet and give their Appro- 
 bation ; at which Time they reciprocally 
 queilion each other concerning the Dil- 
 pofitions of their Children, conjuring 
 that no Failing of Body or Mind, which 
 they have any Knowledge of, may be 
 concealed. The Declaration beino: made 
 before the young Couple, they are feve- 
 rally aflced if any Objedlion arifes from 
 what they have heard ; if not, the Bride's 
 Father appoints the Day of Solemniza- 
 tion, '.upon the Morning of which the 
 Parties repair to the Notlam, where 
 they are queftioned by the Virgins, whe- 
 ther they come there adluated by a pure 
 and undefiled Love, not thro' tlie im- 
 pulfe of irregular PafTions : If a fm- 
 cere Deiire of invariable Conftancy, if a 
 Defign to promote each other's Happi- 
 nefs, and a Refolution jointly to cultivate 
 the Public Good, be their real Motives 
 
 for 
 
C 49 ] 
 
 for coining thither •, which Qiieftions be- 
 ing anlwered by them in the Affirmative, 
 they are placed on their Knees, are each 
 fprinkled thrice, and vow by the Waters 
 of that HoLV Spring, to keep the cor- 
 dial Affc6tion they have profefTed in- 
 violate-, then the Bride prefents a tranf- 
 parent Stone, cut in Form of a Heart, to 
 one of the Virgins, that flie may deli- 
 ver it to the Bridegroom, who returns a 
 counter Part, and then, laying his Hand 
 upon the Bride's Head, fays, — In Judge- 
 ment let me rule\ — {he, preffing her Hand 
 upon his Left Breaft, replies, — And in 
 
 ■Love let me prevail. Here a Virgin, 
 
 again fprinkling them, fays, — May Ferti- 
 lity 7nake you honourable^ and pious Children 
 make you glad Parents, 
 
 So ends the Ceremony; they are then 
 .condu6led back to the Bridegroom's Fa- 
 ther's, where a neat moderate Entertain- 
 ment is provided; after which they retire 
 
 D to 
 
1 50 ] 
 
 to a lonely but moft pleafant rural Spot, 
 called Zamela, or the Plain .of Mo- 
 desty, about ten Silcars, or Miles, 
 from the City, and there live two Rea- 
 pans, or Months, in Privacy •, it being 
 deemed inconfiftent, with juft Referve, 
 for a Female to appear publickly in lefs 
 Time after fo ferious and important a 
 Change of Condition. 
 
 As Interefl and the Influence of Parents 
 have no Concern in thefe Marriages, it is 
 no Matter of Surprize to find them hap- 
 py i befides, as it v/ould be impoffible, 
 from the Method of living all overNoi- 
 bla, to conceal any Coldnefs or Difagree- 
 ment, either of v/hich renders the Parties 
 highly contemptible to Society, if Love, 
 by any extraordinary Chance, Ihould fiil, 
 the Fear of Reproach keeps up at leafl an 
 apparent Cordiality and Decency, which 
 prevents the bad Influence of their Ex- 
 ample, and reilrains them from fuch ir- 
 rational 
 
[ 51 ] 
 
 rational and unnatural Extremities of 
 dome (lie Warfare, as you have feen among 
 many Couples in your World. 
 
 Struck with the Eafe, Simplicity, and 
 Propriety of thefe Cufcoms, I could not 
 help breaking out into a Kind of extatic 
 Approbation J happy, thrice happy Noi- 
 ELANS, faid I, on whom Happinefs flieds 
 her kindefl Influence, how muft I feel, in 
 a comparative View, for my Brothers of 
 the Terreilrial Globe, whofe Inclinations, 
 Devices, and Purfuits, areaimoftat con- 
 tinual Variance with Content; who live 
 as if they were merely framed to torment 
 themfelves, or could f.nd their own Re- 
 pofe only in difturbing Society ; born 
 with perplexing Appetites, nurfed into 
 tyrannical PaiTions, and ripening by con- 
 firmed Years in Difquiet-, while Reafon, 
 dethron'd and enilav'd, becomieS a bafe 
 Procurer to the debauch'd Imagination, 
 and fervilely minifters where it fnoulJ 
 coiTimand. 
 
 D 2 Here 
 
[ 52 ] 
 
 Here the great Bell again tolling in- 
 terrupted my Refiedion, and a Train of 
 Remarks we ihoiild polTibly have made 
 on this Subjed. < . . 
 
 C H A P. IV. 
 
 ^he NamredalV Manner of dining \ his 
 Account of him f elf ^ and many other 
 remarkable Perfonages tranflated from 
 Earth ; with their fever al Deflinations in 
 the Lunar World. 
 
 THE Namredal, for fuch Ifound 
 my kind Inftrudor to be, here re- 
 marked that I ihould lliortly fee the higb- 
 eil Mark of Diltindion that is ever paid 
 in Noibla •, for, fays he, the Chief Ma- 
 giflrate, to fupport Dignity and gain In- 
 fluence, dines alone in this Hall, and is 
 attended by a certain Number of Citi- 
 zens, who pay the Compliment in fuch 
 
 Ro^ 
 
r 53 ] 
 
 Rotation, that each appears in that Sta- 
 tion once a Year. 
 
 Here, being informed that Dinner was 
 approaching, we retir'd into a neighbour- 
 ing Chamber till the Provifion was dif- 
 poied according to Cuftom; which done, 
 we return'd, and found a large Table fup- 
 plied with very elegant Simplicity; a 
 Number of refpedable Perfons appeared 
 in Waiting on each Side, who all, tho' 
 perfonaily and intimately acquainted with 
 the Chief MagiRrate, paid as diftant and 
 humble aRelped, as if they had been no 
 mo:-e than hired Servants. Not being 
 ufed to a Circumdancc of this Kind, I 
 was in fome Degree of Confufion at the 
 extraordinary Honour offered me of fit- 
 ting at the Table-, which the Namredal 
 perceiving, he gently rebuked my Diffi- 
 dence, and placed me near himlelf. Im- 
 mediately after this a venerable Perfon, 
 cloathcd in a long flame- colour'd Gar- 
 E) 3 ment. 
 
C 54 ] 
 
 ment, whom I found to be an Avozen, 
 or Priefl, with very awful and emphatic 
 Deliberation, fpoke thefe Words : 
 
 Fount am of Life^ great and incomprehen- 
 fMe Difpenfer cf all Tubings ejfeniial to Hap- 
 pinefs here and hereafter^ give to thefe Vi- 
 ands fuch falutary Effe^ls^ that they may che- 
 r'tfio and invigorate^ not corrupt and impair^ 
 the humble Receivers^ who gladly praife thy 
 Name^ and confidently reft every Hops in 
 thee. 
 
 » 
 Perceiving fome Difnes prepared in our 
 
 Manner, and juilly imagining they were 
 defigned for me, 1 help'd myielf without 
 Pvcferve, while the Namredal confined 
 jiimfelf to a Sort of Pulfe and Vegetables, 
 mingled fomewhat in the Manner, of our 
 Sallads, and moiftened with an aromatic 
 Liquid, called Azonia. During the 
 Time of Dinner not a Word was uttered, 
 it being held indecent by theNoiBL-ANS 
 
 to 
 
[ 55 ] 
 
 to converfe at Meal-Times, till Thanks 
 are rendered, and they have rinfed their 
 Months thrice with Water from theNoT- 
 
 LAM. 
 
 Having given a Sign that our Appe^ 
 tites were fatisfied, the Table was unco- 
 vered with the greatefl Regularity and 
 Expedition imaginable; when a Defert of 
 various Fruits appeared, feveral of which 
 I tafted, and found them to the Palate as 
 much kiperior in Richnefs and Flavour, 
 as to the Sight they appeared more 
 tempting than any which grow in ourfub- 
 lunary Sphere. At the fam.e Time there 
 was placed before us tv/oChryital VeiTcls, 
 in Form of VvTcathed Snakes, containinp- 
 a Fluid of the pure (I Green I ever faw, 
 and fenren-ting with yellow Sparkles, 
 which appeared at firfl fo like the iliining 
 of a Serpent's fcaly Skin, that I was ra- 
 ther flartled-, but feeing theNAMREDAi^ 
 put his own Mouth to his, placing his 
 
 Hand 
 
C 56 ] 
 
 Hand to his Breaft, and bowing refped- 
 fully round, I did the fame ; at which all 
 in Waiting fet their Left Knees on the 
 Ground, and, leaning their Foreheads on 
 their folded Hands, remained fo till the 
 Namredal had finiflied his Draught; 
 when inllantly a numerous Band of Mu- 
 fic gaye Voice to their Inflruments, and 
 play'd about five Minutes, during which 
 the AvozEN prefented us with Water; 
 and, having purified ourfelves, he with 
 his Right Hand on the Namredal's 
 Head, and his Left upon mine, fpoke to 
 the following Effedt : 
 
 Mqft veneralle Father ^Nodnol, Dele- 
 gate of our ujiiverfal Parerjt^ and thou 
 highly -favoured 'Terrejlrial^ be thankful for 
 paft Bleflings^ and piciifly bidujirious to de- 
 ferie future ; nor hold fuch Indulgences in 
 lefs Eftimation and Gratitude^ hecaufe they 
 are daily conferred^ than if they were adnii- 
 nijiir'a with a mere f paring Hand \ flillre- 
 
 member 
 
I 57 1 
 
 member that^ without the conjlant Support 
 and Dire5Iion of an tinfeen Almighty ylrm^ 
 thofe nor we \ this JJland^ the lower Globe^ 
 nor that great Mafs of Fire which cherifhes 
 the whole with animating Heat ; nor the 
 refi of the celejlial Orbs •, nor that immenfe 
 Firmament thro'' which they roll^ could exifi \ 
 hut^ rufloing into Anarchy and element al War ^ 
 
 mufi crumble into nothing, Remember al- 
 
 fo that the external Purification of Limbs is 
 no farther ufeful than as an emblematical 
 Remembrance of that Purification which 
 your Hearts hourly require, 
 
 Thi> Ceremony being concluded, the 
 AvozEN and all the attending Citizens 
 retired. Being once more by ourfelves, 
 the Namredal refumed Converfation 
 as follows : 
 
 Brother of the nether Globe, it is now 
 Time I fhould let you know fome Parti- 
 culars, which have at leaftNovelry to re- 
 commend 
 
[ 58 ] 
 
 commend them to your Attention : Know 
 then that I was once an Inhabitant of 
 Earth, of that Part of it too which yon 
 come from, and I doubt not but my 
 Name is famihar to you, few Perfons ha- 
 ving made a greater Noife in the Field of 
 Speculation than BiHiop W i l k i n s : 
 Roufed by the Name, I begged Leave, 
 if not inconfiftent with his prefent Dig- 
 nity, to embrace him as a near Relation 
 of the Lunatic Family; v/hich Requeil 
 he moil kindly admitted, and declared 
 himlHf doubly happy in finding not only 
 a Countryman in me but a Kinfman alfo. 
 
 Tho' to all Appearance I died, conti- 
 nued he, and was laid in Earth with the 
 ufual Solemnity, yet the flricl, unv/cari- 
 ed Attention I had paid to the Lunar 
 World, obtained me a Tranilation to 
 this happy Spot, where I have continued 
 ever fince in Eafe and Refped:, without 
 a Willi to gratify, a Fear to perplex, or 
 
 any 
 
[ 59 ]■ 
 
 any vifible Decay. How long I may be 
 permitted to remain, is juft as doubtful 
 as my Exiftcnce in the other World was, 
 becaufe it is ielf-evident that all Beings 
 are in a continual State of Rotation, till 
 a general Coniiimmation of the vail and 
 impenetrable Scheme of Creation dif- 
 folves all pcriiliable Matter, and unites 
 the whole in one wide Field of incorrup- 
 tible Felicity. 
 
 Here my Curiofity led me to inquire 
 if there were any more earthly Inhabi- 
 tants, or if he alone was thus highly fa- 
 voured : To which he replied, that there 
 were great Numbers fcatter'd thro' the 
 Moon, and that Noibla had a confide- 
 rabie Share. Moft Men, fays he, remark- 
 able for either Good or Evil, are tranila- 
 tedtofomePart of the Lunar Regions, 
 as Natives of this World alio are, in Re- 
 turn, occafionally transferred to yours. 
 
[ 6o ] 
 
 I fhall mention a few of thofe at pre- 
 fent in Nodnol, beginning with Alex- 
 ander and Darius J who, barring fome 
 occafional Debates upon their former 
 Quarrels, now live in a State of the mod 
 perfect Friendfliip. C^sar and Pom- 
 PEY alfo live together here upon much 
 the fame Terms ; Cato too appears 
 amonffft us, but retains fo much of fel- 
 fifh Pride and Stoicifm, that he has very 
 little Communion with others ^ like them, 
 however, he is obliged to comply with 
 the Lav/s of Equality prefer ibed here, 
 where there is no Diftindion, and only 
 indulges his Pride in private. 
 
 Thofe Perfonages, you will allow, who 
 fought after unreafonable Pre-eminence 
 over their Fellow-Creatures in a State of 
 former Exiilence, are juflly excluded 
 from Naturalization and the Dignity of 
 Magiftracy in Noibla. Brutus, but 
 for his Ingratitude to his warmed Friend 
 
 and 
 
[ 6I ] 
 
 and reputed Father, would have been 
 here, and well received ; however, as that 
 is deemed the deepeft Stain upon the hu- 
 man heart, he was excluded from this 
 mild Region, and doom'd to the poor 
 and turbulent Country of Erishnover, 
 or Mountains of Blood, where his 
 gentle, humane, philofophic Difpofition 
 renders him contemptible to others, and 
 painful to himfelf. 
 
 We have Peter the Great -of Mus- 
 covy, and the Twelfth Charles of 
 Sweden i Henry the Eighth, Qiieen 
 Elizabeth, Oliver Cromwell, and 
 Charles the Second of England-: 
 Lewis the Fourteenth of France, 
 Cardinal Wolsey, Cecil Lord Bur- 
 leigh, -and many others which it would 
 be too tedious to mention. 
 
 Taking Occafion to remark that, a- 
 niong the Perfonages named, there was 
 
 a 
 
[ 62 ] 
 
 a great Variety of Charaders, and defiring 
 to know with what Propriety they could 
 be fent to the f.ime Spot, the Namred al 
 fatisfied me as follows : 
 
 The feveral Perfons fpoken of, fays 
 he, retain a confiderable Share of thofe 
 PalTions which prevailed in them on 
 Earth ; and, according as they were 
 meritorious or culpable, are punifhed or 
 rewarded here -, not by corporal or exter- 
 nal Recompences, but by the Pleafures 
 and Pains of the Mind, which they expe- 
 rience in a mod fenfible Degree ; a Per- 
 fedion which I take to be in great Mea- 
 fure derived, on the one Hand, from a 
 comparative View of that unchanging Se- 
 renity they fee conftantly around them, 
 yet cannot themfeives enjoy, or, on the 
 other Fland, from a confcious Redlitude, 
 which makes them Partakers in that 
 Tranquillity. 
 
 That 
 
[ 63 ] 
 
 That you may the better underfland 
 me, and more clearly conceive how ge- 
 nerally and impartially Juftice is admini- 
 fter'd thro' tlie Univerie, I will l]<:etch 
 out the feveral Characters. 
 
 Alexander theGREAT, andCi-iARLES 
 the Twelfth, his mad Admirer, were, 
 as Hiftory has informed you, rapacious 
 and unbounded in their Ambition •, an 
 enthufiailic Devotion to the Phantom or 
 Shade of Glory, for the Subilance can ne- 
 ver be gained by lawlefs Principles, had 
 extinguiflied every Spark of general Hu- 
 manity in the Breads of thefe Royal Plun- 
 derers ; like Peililence and Famine they 
 waked but to deftroy ^ like Earthquakes 
 they fhook and fwallowed up whole Na- 
 tions-, pale Defolation, with the red Right 
 Arm of War, bore their Standards; infa- 
 tiate Death nodded in grim Smiles upon 
 their Helmets; and the devouring Grave 
 yawned wide in all their Councils; in vain 
 
 the 
 
[ 64 ] ■ 
 
 the Groans of Widows, the Cries of Or- 
 phans, and the Wreck of Kingdoms, 
 ftruck their Eyes and Ears ; fortified, the 
 one by his Ambition, the other by his 
 Cruelty, againft all humane and tender 
 Sentiments, they ran the Race of Deilruc- 
 tion, till at laft they themlelves fell Sacri- 
 fices to the Violence and Inconfiftency of 
 their Natures; at which Period they were 
 tranflated hither, with what Fitnefs you 
 fhall judge. 
 
 As a Thirft of unlimited Power w^as 
 the ruling Principle of their Lives ; as 
 Turbulence and the Diftrefles of Multi- 
 tudes were their chief Enjoyments, they 
 have been fentenced to this Region of 
 Peace ; v/herein, retaining their former ra- 
 pacious Inclinations, they are tormented 
 w'lth a conflant Defire of Rule and Pre- 
 cedency, which they can by no Means 
 £)btain ; and labour under hourly Difap- 
 pointments of thofe Plans they are con- 
 
 Hantly 
 
[65 ] 
 
 •ftantly framing to kindle Difcord and 
 create Confufion : Befides which, Alex- 
 ander's Pride has the Mortification of 
 ■ being obliged, once each Week, to at- 
 tend upon Darius as a menial Servitor; 
 however, on Account of his generous 
 and delicate Behaviour to the Females of 
 that Monarch's Family, this Part of his 
 painful Situation is rendered as eafy as 
 pofTible. while the hot-brained Charles 
 is doomed to a daily unremitted Attend- 
 ance upon the Czar Peter; which mag- 
 nanimous Monarch, in return of his un- 
 wearied Attention and patriot Care to the 
 Improvement of fo great and uncultiva- 
 ted an Empire as he reigned over, not 
 only enjoys every Privilege of a natural- 
 born NoiBLAN, but, fmce his Arrival 
 here, has alfo been three Times chofen 
 Namredal of this City by general Suf- 
 frage, and has as often been rewarded, 
 for his worthy Exercife of that Office, 
 with the molt unlimited Approbation. 
 
 E * C^sar, 
 
1 Sfj ] 
 
 C^SAR, as a generous, humane Con- 
 oqueror, of an open, confident, and un- 
 fufpicious Nature, who being above 
 Treachery himfelf faw it not in others, 
 is held in confiderable Efteem -, but as 
 he was the chief Caufe of reducing his 
 Country firft under didatorial and after- 
 ward^ under imperial Power, he is not 
 allowed to rank as a Citizen; yet his 
 firft Steps proceeding rather from the 
 Principle of Self-defence than of Ambi- 
 tion, he is as mueh indulged as poITible; 
 while his AntagoniftPoMPEY, whofe fel- 
 fifli, ftubborn Pride was the Caufe of 
 fubverting that Liberty he pretended 
 to fupport, is placed in a much inferior 
 Station, "entirely dependent upon Ce- 
 sar's Interpofition for any Advantge he 
 may defire : As to Cato, he pafTes his 
 Time in aKind of contemptible Solitude, 
 branded with the indelible Stigma of ha- 
 -ving fled like a Coward from his Coun- 
 try when flie moft needed his Help, by 
 
 ail 
 
[ 67 ] 
 
 an unjuftiiiable and ignominious Suicide ; 
 a Step fo mean and culpable, that, were 
 it not for the Counterbalance of many 
 private Virtues he poflefTed, his Doom 
 would have been much more fevere. I 
 had almod forgot to tell you that Marc 
 Antony is here, as fond of Gaiety as 
 ever; but labours under the Inconveni- 
 ence of being obliged to wear a Moppet 
 hunor round his Neck, as a Mark of his 
 Folly in lofmg the World for a worthlefs 
 Woman. 
 
 Henry the Eighth has brought 
 with him hither all his Spirit of Reli- 
 cious Reformation; it iliil remains fo 
 a6live and impetuous, that he never lets 
 our AvozENS alone; who hear him in- 
 deed, but as often laugh at the vain Ef- 
 forts of Innovation, to the no fmall Mor- 
 tification of his Pride : He is alfo equally 
 amorous, without being able to gain the 
 Efteem of any one Female, or any Reply 
 to his AddreiTes, except the Recapitula- 
 E 2 tion 
 
I 68 ] 
 
 tion of his Behaviour to thofe Wives 
 whom he treated with fo much Cruelty 
 ■on Earth : Befides which, that he may be 
 the better known and more defpifed, he 
 is once a Month carried thro' the City, at 
 certain Parts whereof the following No- 
 .tification is fet forth : 
 
 Behold^ ye Noiblans, a Monster, 
 -wbo^ while in Power ^ the Father of a gene- 
 rous.^ hrave^ and free People^ facrificed every 
 Confideratio% all nobler Principles^ to Lufl 
 and Pride, making even Religion a Party 
 in his abominable Schemes, whom neither 
 hallozved Shrines, nor the tender and melting 
 'Tye of Beauty, could reflrain from Depre- 
 'dations and Cruelties, 
 
 His Daughter Elizabeth, for many 
 great and eminent Quahties, is allowed 
 "Precedence of all Females in Nodnol, 
 <ind would have been once chofen to the 
 'Magiilracy -, but the Caprice of having 
 
 facrificed 
 
[ 69 ] 
 
 facrlficed a Favourite to ill-grounded Re- 
 fentment or Jealoufy, and the Cruelty of 
 having even agreed to the Execution of 
 fo amiable a Princefs as her Sifter of 
 Scotland, were univerfally allowed to 
 be fuch Blemifhes in Chara6ler as render- 
 ed her unfit for the Dignity fhe folliclted. 
 This Difappointment fo rankles in her 
 Breaft, that fhe is often heard to figh 
 deeply, and to exclaim, 0/6 Essex ! Ob 
 Mary ! not content with having fix'd a 
 dead and painful Load upon my Heart while 
 in the lower Worlds doyoupurfiie and haunt 
 me here to imhitter the Happinefs^ diftiirh 
 the Peace^ and prevent the Honour I might 
 enjoy ? Mufi your Blood ftain and cloud my 
 Chara^er ? Muft your Groans filence the 
 Voice of Fame ? Thus does flie often be- 
 wail herfelf : So deep, fo lafting, and fo 
 powerful are the Stings of Confcience ; 
 which, far outftretching the Wounds of 
 human Weapons, prolong their Pains to- 
 Liimortality, 
 
 E 3, Oliver- 
 
[ 70 J 
 
 Oliver Cromwell, who next appears 
 in View, ever fince his Arrival had been 
 endeavouring to obtain the Naturahza- 
 tion and Government of the City; full of 
 the fame Ilypocrify which led him to 
 the Protectorship of England ^ Ma- 
 iler of the fame infmuating Arts of Popu- 
 larity, he had endeavour'd to recommend 
 himfelf as an implicit, ftrid, and zealous 
 Admirer of the Laws, both Religious and 
 Political. Under this agreeable Sem- 
 blance many began to look on him v/ith 
 a favourable Eye, efpecially as he had in- 
 a moft plaufible Manner painted himfelf 
 as the AfTertor of Liberty; and to the 
 Charge of having been a Regicide, offer- 
 ed the following Vindication : 
 
 " I (land before you. Oh Noiblans, to 
 claim the Privileges of a Citizen ; one 
 only Objedion you feem to make, the 
 Fate of an unhappy Monarch, which has 
 been Chiefly attributed to me y but let me 
 
 alTerty 
 
[ 7^ T 
 
 afTert, and that with the flridteft Truth, 
 that Charles, thro' Cbilinacy and the 
 Advice of evil Counfellors, fell a Sacri- 
 fice to the ungovernable Rage of a Na- 
 tion highly and juilly incenied , not, as 
 Heaven is my Witnefs, thro' any ambi- 
 tious Views or finiller Influence of mine. 
 Make the Cafe your own, Oh Noibl ans ; 
 luppofe this Island of the fame poHtical 
 Conllitution as England ; that you had 
 feen every Right infringed -, that you had 
 traced Royal Prerogative advancing with 
 gigantic Strides, and crufhing Liberty 
 on every Side •, would you not have felt? 
 Would you not have fpoke ? And, find- 
 ing Remonllances fail, would you not 
 have roufed Force to vindicate yourfelves? 
 Does Reafon or Law exempt any Man 
 from Examination, or fecure him inOp- 
 preflion, becaufe Chance makes him Heir 
 to Regal Dignity ? Would you, like paf- 
 five and defencelefs Lambs, tamely wait 
 till the ravening Wolf leap'd the Fold 
 
 and 
 
[ 72 ] 
 
 and revelled in your dearefl Blood ? Your 
 happy Frame of Government knows not 
 fuch Convulfions, and may it never know 
 them ; yet Imagination may awake your 
 Feehngs and inform your Judgment. If 
 Self-defence be the firfl great Law of 
 Nature, is it not full as juftifiable in a 
 Nation as in an Individual ? And if fo, 
 mufl there not be fome Condu6tors, who, 
 like Sinews in the human Body, may brace 
 and give Strength to the Body Politic ? 
 In this Capacity it pleafed Providence to 
 place me ^ and, for many Years, much 
 againft my natural Difpofition, I toiled 
 thro' Fatigues and Blood, not only en- 
 countering the Hazards of War, but alia 
 the greater and more fure working Dan- 
 ger of numberlefs Snares laid for my 
 Life, both by declared and fecret Ene- 
 mies ; who, not having Ability or For- 
 tune to ferve their Country fo effedlually, 
 wifhed to remove me as the chief Ob- 
 
 ftacle in the Way of their Pride. 
 
 Thro' 
 
[ 7^ J 
 
 " Thro' all this I ftruggled with nnaba- 
 ting Condancy : Was it for me fingly to 
 Hand againft Juftice and popular Rage, 
 nay, againft my own Confcience too, in 
 Favour of Charles? I know it has been 
 faid that his Exile or Imprifonment would 
 have been more eligible than his Death ; 
 yet to me either Alternative feems cruel 
 or wretched : Admitting he was a good 
 Man, but a bad King, which his moil 
 fanguine Friends have allowed •, w^as it 
 not more humane, and more confident 
 wdth his Dignity, to remove him from the 
 Turbulence of this Life by momentary 
 Pain, than to keep him in a lingering 
 State of Captivity, or force him into fo- 
 reign Climates, a poor and miferable De- 
 pendent ? But why, it may be faid, if a 
 GOOD Man, fhould he be removed at all? 
 Nothing can be more obvious than that 
 public and private Virtues are widely 
 different ; the narrow Sphere of one can 
 never be extended to the wide Expanfion of 
 
 the 
 
[ 74 ] 
 
 the other. Intention may be good, Exe- 
 cution bad-, and as, in the natural Body, 
 Realbn diredts us to part with the dearell 
 Limb, however valuable and elTential, if 
 it threatens Corruption to the whole j fo, 
 in the political one, any Member, v/hofe 
 Life muft inevitably be the Source of 
 Contentions ihould be cut off: This be- 
 ing an indifpenfibleNecelTity, why fhould 
 thofe who effed: the Separation be more 
 blamed than a Surgeon is for an Ampu- 
 tation ? In this Light only my Adherence 
 to the common Caufe is to be confidered j 
 and furely my Adminiftration, which was 
 crowned not only with Refped^, but 
 Terror abroad, and national Happinefs 
 at home, muft fufficiently prove that I 
 a6led upon fuch Principles, and fuch only; 
 but arduous. and precarious is every pub- 
 lic Undertaking, however difmterefted, 
 however perilous. Envy lies in wait with 
 her invenomed Tooth, and Slander with 
 her poifon-dropping Tongue -, however 
 
 hcvQy 
 
[ IS ] 
 
 here, where neither the one nor the other 
 has any Exiilence, I prefume this plain, 
 unadorned, and unfludied Apology for 
 the fole Objedion that is urged againll 
 me, will be fuilicient to fet your Suffra- 
 ges at Liberty ; which, if I did not mean 
 to deferve, I never would follicit." 
 
 Already prepared as they were, this 
 Harangue confiderably prejudiced the 
 Citizens in his Favour, when Charles 
 the Second produced a Paper, which 
 Cromwell could not deny to be his 
 Hand- Writing, containing a Scheme for 
 brino-ing: the Island ofNoiBLA under 
 monarchical Government. This raifed fa 
 much Indignation againft him, that he 
 was immediately appointed to the fervile 
 Office of SoLARMAN, or Common Cry- 
 ER, which he fills up with infinite Dif- 
 guft. 
 
 The 
 
[7^1 
 
 The Second Charles, who, in his 
 t^rreftrial State, was remarkable for no- 
 thing but Libertinifm, and a Difregard 
 of Religion, is, in Return, chained, as 
 I may fay, to the painful Office of Ra- 
 NEVER in one of our Temples, a Place 
 fomewhat fimilar to that of a Verger ; 
 by which he is obliged to attend Devo- 
 tion at lead four Times each Day, and 
 fs alfo totally debarred from the Co/iverfe 
 of Women, for whom he has as great a 
 PalTion as formerly v/hen he was King. 
 
 There is not a Perfonage in Noibla 
 that is in a more painful or ridiculous Si- 
 tuation than Lewis the Fourteenth of 
 France ^ Oflentation having been his 
 Idol, he is reduced to a more obfcure and 
 penurious Appearance than any other in 
 Noibla, under which he labours to main- 
 tain all his former Dignity ; but having 
 no Sycophants near to blazon his Praife, 
 he writes miferable Sonnets upon himfelfj 
 
 goes 
 
I 77 1 
 
 ^oes about building Things he calls tri- 
 umphal Arches, and Memorials of Vic- 
 tories •, while C^SAR, in particular, 
 laughs at his Folly, and Alexander fol- 
 lowing, kicks down the frail Baby-houfes 
 of his Pride as fail as he raiies them ; but 
 his heaviefl Grievance is, that among the 
 numberlefs Relations he makes of his 
 own and the French Greatnefs, not one 
 meets with Credit ; it being well known 
 that while a King, Truth and Faith were 
 two Points he never regarded, when Pride 
 and Ambition came into the oppofite 
 Scale. 
 
 WoLSE Y, that puffed-up Mufhroom of 
 'Fortune, in Return of his mofl exorbitant 
 Infolence, is here reduced to the Office 
 •of keeping the Ruvenal-, that is, fweep- 
 -ing it every Day, and tolling the Elkni- 
 TAN before the Citizens dine. 
 
 Burleigh, 
 
r 78 ] 
 
 Burleigh, as a faithful Mlnifter, who 
 confulted and held an exa6l Equilibrium 
 between the Dignity' of his Royal Miftrefs 
 and the Liberty of his Countrymen, is 
 naturalized, and generally makes one of 
 the Council that are chofen to alTift the 
 Nam RED AL, upon dubious or intricate 
 Occafions. 
 
 Thus I have ilcetched out fome of the 
 many remarkable Perfonages which are 
 in this Capital ; and I am perfuaded their 
 feverai Deflinations will be thought juft. 
 
 Here I exprefTed great Pleafure and 
 Gratitude to the Namredal upon this 
 Relation, and begged Leave to afk him 
 concerning fome Perfons w^ho occured to 
 my Recolledion ; he kindly defiring me 
 to give full Scope to my Curiofity, I pro- 
 ceeded, and he replied, as will be found 
 in the following Chapter. 
 
 C H A K 
 
'I 79'] 
 
 C H A P. V. 
 
 Containing Stri^ures upon the Freedom of 
 Authors and the Press ; a prevailing 
 Se5l in Religion confidered \ the Stations 
 of fever al of the Literati transferred from 
 Earth to the NLo on confidered. 
 
 YOU aflv me, fays the Namredal, 
 if none of the Tribe of Authors 
 have gained Admittance here ? — Yes. — 
 Many. For Genius is highly admired, 
 Laudatur et Alget is not the Cafe in Noi- 
 BLA ; their PofTefTions are equal to any 
 Citizen's; whereJ:bre, nothavingPover- 
 ty to chill, nor Perplexity to trammel it. 
 Fancy takes a full, unbounded Scope ; 
 and as all write for Praife, none for Hire, 
 the Quality, and not the Quantity of 
 Things written is regarded ; this prevents 
 theSubjedl from being foon thread-bare, 
 and relieves the Author from the dif- 
 agreeable NecefTity of being, like a Poft- 
 
 Horfe, 
 
T 80 ] 
 
 Horfe, obliged to drudge to a particular 
 Spot, wearied or not. 
 
 Every Writer being at full Liberty to 
 chufe hisSubjedl, and not at all depend- 
 ing upon the Sale of his Book, is free 
 from any Obligation of flattering popular 
 Paflions J he thinks according to his Judg- 
 ment, and honeflly writes as he thinks ; 
 he need not, for the Support of Nature, 
 fc^tter infectious Sentiments among the 
 People, to the great Prejudice of Mora- 
 lity, as was remarkably the Cafe upon 
 Earth when I was there. Anfwer me. 
 Have you not flill the Vermin amongft 
 you who produce, and worfe Vermin who 
 love to feaft upon, fuch poifonous Mate- 
 rials ? 
 
 Yes, venerable Sir, fays T, we certainly 
 have, tho', to the Praife of England be 
 it fpoken, Virtue was never more fel- 
 dom put to the Blulh than at prefent. 
 
 Our 
 
[ 8i ] 
 
 Oiir Authors, for the mofl Part, want 
 Fancy, but their Sentiments arc chafte; 
 nor dol think this Merit owing to their 
 Integrity, fo much as to the Public Opi- 
 nion, which happily reje6ls and leverely 
 condemns licentious Produ6tions, I mean 
 in the Works of mere Entertainment: 
 Indeed, as to Religion and Politics, 
 tho' we have lefs to complain of, and 
 more to admire in both than any other 
 Nation, yet they are in general treated 
 with great Freedom, and fometimes with 
 much Scurrility, under the fpecious Veil 
 I of Liberty; a Word more admired, 
 more ufed, and more abufed in Britain, 
 than in any Part of the Globe befides : 
 However, as thofe Convulfions which* 
 fometimes take Place in the general Con- 
 ftitution of Nature, fuch as Tempefts, 
 Earthquakes, &c. flrengthen and pre- 
 ferve the whole, tho' they create Fear 
 and fpread Deflrudtion in particular 
 Spots i fo watchful and turbulent Spirits 
 
 F arc 
 
[ 82 1 
 
 are elTential to a Free State, to intimidate 
 and detedt bad Statefmen, who may be 
 crawling, with the flow and fubtle Steps 
 of Snake-hke Policy, to unwarrantable 
 .Lengths. But it may be faid thofe loud- 
 tongued Guardians of Freedom are for 
 the mod Part defigning Men, of venal 
 Difpofitions ; no Matter what their Views 
 may be, if they fet forth feafonable 
 Truths j — -as to the JnGonvenience real 
 Patriots m.ay labour under from ground- 
 lefs and malicious Cenfure; it is an una- 
 .voidable Tax upon Office, yet of trifling 
 Importance -, like the Babbhng of an un- 
 ftaunch Hound, it may caufe the Pack 
 to open, but it cannot lead them far up- 
 on a falie Scent •, and however flrong the 
 Web of Deceit may be wrought, Fadls 
 are too ftubborn to be confined by it. 
 Hence the Liberty of the Press, how- 
 ever it may be abufed, (and no human In- 
 ilitution is perfedt) ought to be mofl care- 
 fully preferved, as an unreferved Monitor 
 
 to 
 
[ S3 ] 
 
 to King, Statesmen, and People : 
 Hence it is that British Monarchs, 
 if they will but read, have an Advantage 
 above all others in regard of popular 
 Grievances •, and hence is it alfo that 
 Statesmen may be correfted in their 
 Blunders, or chaflifed for their Villany. 
 Confcious Honefly, founded on a Rock, 
 can weather the lierceft Gales of Fac-* 
 tion •, and I believe it is an irrefragable 
 Truth, that of all the Revolutions which 
 have taken Place among civilized Go- 
 vernments, there is fcarce one to be pro- 
 duced, however wantonly it might be- 
 carried on, but what was originally found- 
 ed on Right. If an Adminiftration, thro* 
 Obitinacy or ill Defigns, will not hear and 
 redrefs the Grievances of a People, 'ti* 
 not at all furprizing that the many-head- 
 ed Moniler, once enraged and broken 
 loofe, fliould fubvert all Order, tread up- 
 on all Law, and mark its ruinous Steps 
 widi Blood. 
 
 F 2 Moft 
 
. Moft- Nations, Free ones efpecially, 
 fhould be dealt with like a fpirited Horfe, 
 whom a judicious Rider will keep fteady, 
 .by maintaining an exaft Balance in his 
 Seat, fnewing neither Fear nor Cruelty, 
 occafionaliy giving and checking the 
 Rein, while he prudently and reiblutely 
 corre6ls with the Spur, or iindly blan- 
 diflies with his Hand. 
 
 Your Obfervations, my dear Country- 
 man, lays the Namredal, are perfectly 
 
 juft, and may the great Barrier of Free- 
 dom you have mentioned guard Britain 
 to the End of Time -, may no Pretext of 
 infulted Dignity, no Artifice of Power, 
 ever circumfcribe its Liberties. — Flow 
 do I rejoice to hear that Modefty finds 
 
 •pubhc Protection ; this is indeed a glo- 
 rious and efiential Limitation ; but 
 what am I to think of thofe Attacks, 
 fometimes grofs ones you fay, which are 
 
 .made upon Religion ? Do they not ap- 
 pear 
 
L 85 ]' 
 
 pear of a mod irrational, pernicious, and 
 criminal Nature ? Does not the Breath of 
 Infidelity go forth like a two-edged 
 Sword to deilroy? Does it not, like pefii- 
 lential Air, blaft the rich Harvell of fu- 
 ture Hopes ? Does it not intoxicate with 
 chimerical Reafonings and fophiftical 
 Diilindions, which, like an Ignis fatuus m 
 the Night, ihoot forth delufive Beams to 
 miflead the unwary Follower ? 
 
 Such'Effefls, fageNAMREDAL, fays I, 
 may undoubtedly be feared ; and the 
 more, as fome Perlbns of eminent Abili- 
 ties have aiTiduoufly laboured in thefe 
 Works of Perverfion ; yet flill I comfort 
 myfeif with Hope that the grand, uni- 
 form, and beautiful Fabric of Religion, 
 framed by an Almighty Founder, can 
 never be endangered by the Blafts of 
 Envy : Indeed its external Charms may 
 be fomewhat obfcured, its Purity defiled 
 by occafional Filth, with which its Ene- 
 F 3 mies 
 
[ 86 ] 
 
 mies befpatter it; but, felf-exiflent, it 
 ftands above tlie vain Efforts of Liber- 
 tinifm, and, like the Ermin, foon frees 
 itfelf from all the Stains of Pollution. 
 
 If its Minifters were but half fo alTidu- 
 ous to fupport it as its Enemies are to 
 pull it down, its Dignity would eafily be 
 maintained : Neither Virtue, Courage, 
 Wiidom, nor any Qualification, is known 
 without Trial; almoft anyone may fleer a 
 Ship in a Calm, but Shoals, Rocks, and 
 tempeftuous Seas prove the able Mariner; 
 wherefore the Oppofers of Religion. 
 feem a Kind of providential Inftruments 
 to aid and improve its Strength. From 
 open Attacks it is in very little Danger; 
 but there are unnatural Bofom-Foes, 
 w^ho, having got a Place in the Temple, 
 by the Flames of Enthufiafm endeavour 
 to deftroy it ; or, thro' the Incongruity 
 of Zeal, heap difproportionate Additions 
 upon the Edifice, till it becomes deform- 
 ed 
 
[ ^7 ] 
 ed to the Sight, and fo very tottering- 
 that the fligh^-eil Breath of rational In- 
 quiry fliakes it from the Foundation. 
 
 Here is the Danger to be feared and 
 lamented; yet lb very gentle and paf- 
 five are our Pastors in general, that 
 they fuffcr Sheep-clothed Wolves to en- 
 ter their Folds and devour their Flocks: 
 Nay, the Madnefs or Knavery has reach- 
 ed fome 01 themfelves', feveral who fhould 
 be its Guardians have joined this de- 
 ftru6live Crew, and that not only with 
 Impunity from their Superiors, but with 
 theChara6ter of Saints from the People. 
 I myfelf knew a Clergyman in that Part 
 of England calFd Yorkshire, who, 
 while he ufed the common uniform Me- 
 thod of inflrudting his own Congrega- 
 tion, was no more thought of than any 
 neighbouringGownfman j but being once 
 charadlerized as the Favourer of zn en- 
 thufiaftic, and I fear hypocritical, Std:^ 
 
 and 
 
[ 88 ] 
 
 and purfuing their itinerant Method of 
 preaching from Place to Place, his Influ- 
 ence To far increafed, that he could draw 
 People a Dozen or Twenty Miles to hear 
 his infpired Dodrine. — Amazing Infatu- 
 ation of the giddy Multitude ! that a Man 
 mufl lofe his Senfes or his Honefty to 
 pleafe them •, that Madnefs or Hypocrify 
 fhould prevail more than truly orthodox 
 Principles, or clear and folid Reafon ! 
 
 Aye, replies the Namredal ! Is it 
 even io ? You have then indeed rightly 
 pointed out the real Danger, and I am 
 particularly concerned at your Charge of 
 Indolence againft fo many of the Holy 
 Brotherhood ; undoubtedly if they would 
 fet ferioufly to work ; if in their Preach- 
 in o- they would fpeak as much from the 
 Heart, with as much Feeling as thofe In- 
 novators y^^;;^ to do •, having found Doc- 
 rine, fit Morals, impartial Reafon, and 
 cftabiifh'd Authority, they niuft foon root 
 
 out, 
 
[ 89 ] 
 
 out, by Conv'itiion^ fuch noxious Weeds as 
 produce nothing but falfe Zeal, unintelli- 
 gible Speculation, and rambling Excla- 
 mations, which extort, from Weakn efs 
 and Ignorance, Ailonifhment, Tears, and 
 Groans; while moral and focial Virtues 
 are fwallowed up in a Chaos of ill-regu- 
 lated Faith and unefTential Melancholy; 
 the firft of which audacioufly prompts 
 them to believe themfelves Saints, and the 
 latter, in a great Meafure, renders them 
 unfit for the reafonable and necefTary Pur- 
 fuit of their worldly Concerns. 
 
 Is it not wonderful, continues he, that 
 in the moft important as well as the mofl 
 trifling Concerns of Life, Perfons in the 
 nether Globe are led by Oil:entation ? 
 That notwithilanding multiphed Inftan- 
 ces of pretending Patriots making a 
 fnug Retreat under the Shelter of Places, 
 Penfions, or Titles, and being as it were 
 miraculoufly ftruck dumb, any Man, by 
 
 the 
 
[ 90 J 
 
 the felf-fame Steps, ihall become a po-^ 
 pillar Favourite, and be looked on as the 
 Shield of Liberty, to ward off the En- 
 croachments of Power ? Is it not equally 
 aftonifhing that in Religion alfo, tho' 
 they are warned of falfe Teachers, every 
 vociferous Fanatic or fan6lified Hypo- 
 crite can miflead the Multitude P Who 
 like him bed who has the greatefl Volu- 
 bility of Tongue, whofe Speech is the 
 loudefl and mofl impetuous, and finds 
 mofl Fault with eftabliflied Principles^ 
 or Cuiloms ? But what furpalTcs all Ima- 
 gination, is, hov/ the moft illiterate Up- 
 ftarts can gain this Influence ; Wretches 
 who impudently boaft of Ignorance as an' 
 Apoftolic Recommendation. — Oh Hy- 
 pocrify ! — Oh Novelty ! How powerful 
 are thy Charms ! Before them Reafon flies 
 an Exile ; or, turning Suicide, efFedls her 
 own Deflrudlon. 
 
 Here 
 
[ 91 ] 
 
 Here, Imagining that we had gone far 
 enough upon this SubjecSt, which, mi- 
 nutely confidered, would have led us into 
 inextricable Prolixity, and that, after our 
 utmoil Endeavours, we could contribute 
 little more than our Wifhes to prevent 
 or to amend, I returned to my Inquirv 
 concerning Authors, and the Namre- 
 DAL proceeded to grve me the following 
 Account-, confining himfelf, for Brevi-' 
 ty's Sake, as he obferved, to the moft re- 
 markable of the antient Claffics, and the 
 mofl diflinguiilied EnCxLish Writers : 
 
 Homer, fays he, prefides over Epic 
 Poetry in Nodnol, adifted by Virgil 
 and Milton, who each contefted Supe- 
 riority with him; but, upon afairDebate, 
 were obliged to yield, he having made 
 it plainly appear that his Plan and mod 
 of his Thoughts were original; that he 
 had Recourfe only to his own Genius 
 and Judgment, while his Competitors 
 
 had 
 
[ 92 ] 
 
 had the advantageous Example of his 
 Labours , that tho' the Mantuan was 
 more corre6t and uniform, yet he excel- 
 led in Imagery and Characters ; alfo that 
 the Briton's boafled Angels and De- 
 vils were but an Improvement upon his 
 Gods and Goddesses, drawn from a 
 more copious, ftriking, and elevated Syf- 
 tem of Religion. Upon this approved 
 Superiority he was, by univerfal Suf- 
 frage, allowed Precedence ; of which 
 however, in Compliment to the great 
 Abilities of his two Brothers, he makes 
 very little Ufe. Since his Arrival he has 
 produced a Work of infinite Merit, call'd 
 the Alexandriad, as a grateful Com- 
 pliment to that Prince for the great 
 Efteem he fhewed, while on Earth, for 
 his Works and Memory. 
 
 Horace, whom we have here alfo, 
 and is reckoned a fpirited fecial Compa- 
 nion, is appointed to write an Ode to 
 
 each 
 
[ 93 ] 
 
 «ach new Namredal; wherein he muft 
 not, as is ufual in yourBiRTH-DAY Odes, 
 idolize the Magiitrate, but point out and 
 celebrate thole Virtues which may ren- 
 der him worthy of his Dignity. 
 
 Juvenal, who pofleiTes his former 
 Cacoethes fcribendl^ with a Pen dipp'd in 
 Gall, fince we have no Vices amongft us, 
 cannot, indulge his Spleen with brandifh- 
 ing the Iron Rod of Satire \ but, as a 
 Punilhment for having ufed it unmerci- 
 fully in the other World, he is obliged to 
 write Panegyrics upon C/Esar, who de- 
 fpifes them -, and is doomed to fee Plea- 
 fan try fmile around, while he, unheeded, 
 fnarles and mumbles Difcontent between 
 his Teeth. 
 
 Bacon, Locke, and Newton are 
 vefled with the Superintendance of all 
 Philofophical Tranfa6lions, having fuc- 
 ceeded as more general, and therefore 
 
 more 
 
* [ 94 i 
 
 more capable, to Socrates, Plato, 
 and Seneca. The Stagyrite pleaded 
 hard for Admittance, and his Abilities 
 v^ere complimented with eminent Ap- 
 probation ; but the irrational A6bion of 
 drowning himfelf counterbalanced all 
 Merit, and reduced him to the Neceffity 
 of being Asselan, or Uflier, to New- 
 ton. — Shaftesbury alio, with an Air 
 of much Pertnefs and Importance, offer- 
 ed himfelf a Candidate ; but was totally 
 rejected for felf-fufficient Peculiarity, and 
 a reftlefs Spirit of introducing his own 
 chimerical Notions, to the Prejudice of 
 eilablifhed and well-grounded Opinions. 
 
 Tacitus and Clarendon prefide 
 over Hiftory. My Brother Bilhop Bur- 
 net would gladly have been their Co- 
 adjutor; but being convided of grofs 
 Mifreprefentations and fliamefulFalfiries 
 in the Hiftory of bis own Times^ he was 
 peremptorily refufed, and obliged to 
 
 compound 
 
C 95 1 
 
 -compound for the Place of Amannenfis 
 to Clarendon ; in which Capacity Ta- 
 citus is ferved by Quintus Curtius, 
 who having been ufed to write nothing 
 but Romance and Flattery, feels infinite 
 Pain at being obliged to tranfcribe ufe- 
 ful Maxims and Fads faithfully related, 
 without the Liberty to add one Flouriih 
 of his own exuberant Imagination. 
 
 Over the Drama Shakespear fits Su- 
 preme, and is dignified with the Title of 
 Angam Arutan, or Delineator of Na- 
 ture. Here, as in his former State of 
 Exiftence, he furnilhes our Estralam, 
 ,or Theatre, with the moft celebrated 
 Pieces exhibited amongft us; while Rv- 
 mer, and fome other carping Critics, who 
 fnarled at Beauties they could not com- 
 prehend, are obliged to clean his Shoes 
 iilternately, as a Mark of their Subjec- 
 tion. 
 
 Drydew 
 
^- [ gS ] 
 
 DrydeNjLee, andOTWAY contribute 
 alfo to the public Amufemenr, as well as 
 feveral naturalized Noiblans. Thofe 
 admitted to the Clafs of Poets are digni- 
 fied by a Laurel Crown ; but Dryden, 
 as a Mark of his unfteady Principles, 
 both in Religion and Politics, is obliged 
 to wear a Weathercock alfo on his Head. 
 Lee appears with a chained Maniac, 
 Emblem of his Frenzy ; and Otway 
 is diftinguijfhed by a Roll, pointing out 
 his Fate on Tower-Hill^ and Handing as 
 a Memorial of the Prodigality which 
 brought him to that wretched End. 
 
 Not having heard any Mention of Ben 
 Johnson or Pope, I afked the Nam- 
 REDAL if they were in Nodnol; the 
 former, fays he, is not, but the latter 
 is. Two Points, notwithftanding the 
 Claim of a powerful Genius, which was 
 admitted, excluded Ben : Firft, his abo- 
 minable Principles bordering upon A- 
 
 theifm i 
 
[ 97 ] 
 
 theifm •, and next, his Ingratitude to 
 Shakespear, either of which was fiif- 
 ficient to fliut him out ; fo that he is ba- 
 nifhed to Erishnover ; where, the very 
 Name of Genius being hated, he drags 
 on a tedious and defpicable Exigence. As 
 to Pope, on Account of his Abilities, his 
 fiHal Affedlion, and the particular Regard 
 HoM E R expreffed for him, he might have 
 been very happy ; but, being charged by 
 poor Dennis with moft unmerciful 
 Cruelty to him, and a fhameful Envy of 
 his Contemporaries, both which Accufa- 
 tions were fully proved, he was fenten- 
 ced to wear a Laurel Wreath, mingled 
 with Sprigs of Nightjhadey by v/hich it is 
 not a little blafted •, and, moreover, he is 
 almoft continually tormented with the 
 Jefts and Railery of Colley Cibber, 
 Beau Nash, and John Rich, late Ma- 
 nager of Covent-Garden Theatre, the 
 thret Merry Andrews of Nodnol. 
 
 G Ad- 
 
{ 9S ] 
 
 Addison, who was rather admitted as 
 a GOOD Man than a great Poet, on 
 Account of his Integrity, his Zeal for 
 Morality and Religion while he was on 
 Earth, has been naturalized a Citizen, 
 and enjoys the Pod of Secretary to the 
 Namredal, and thro' his Interceffion, 
 tho' not without much Difficulty, Swift 
 .has been admitted his Affiftant -, but, on 
 Account of many Objedions, he enjoys 
 not any NoiBL an Privileges, it being pro- 
 ved upon him that, while in the Minifle- 
 rial Fundion, he paid more Attention to 
 Politics than Divinity-, that Ambition, 
 not Piety, was his ruling Principle -, that 
 he ever took more Delight to cenfure 
 than commend; that he anatomized Cha- 
 raders with as little Remorfe as Surgeons 
 do Bodies •, and that he was guilty of un- 
 heard-of Cruelty in regard of Vanessa. 
 However, as 1 have remark'd, Addison's 
 Intereft, enforced with the Argument 
 d!:hat he had done many extenfive and 
 
 well- 
 
[ 99 ] 
 
 ^cll-appropriated Charities, gained him 
 AdmiiTion ; yet his Situation is but indif- 
 ferent, for his Pride ill brooks ib fubor- 
 dinate a State, and his perverfe Nature is 
 mortified at the Tranquillity he fees a- 
 round him ; fo that he never enjoys any 
 Satisfaction, unlefs he meets fome of his 
 Countrymen wearing Badges of theij 
 Vice or Folly ; and then, DioczNES-like, 
 Jie gratifies his malicious Temper with 
 cynical Sneers and biting Sarcafms. 
 
 Inquiring whether there were any here 
 of other learned or honourable Profel-- 
 iions, the N A MR E DAL told me. Very few; 
 .and the Reafon, fays he, may be given 
 without many Words : None of the 
 Clergy can be admitted, unlefs it evident- 
 ly appears that the firfb great Motive for 
 taking Orders W3,s, not the lucrative View 
 of a large Income, for the Indulgence of 
 an indolent luxurious Life, but a ferious 
 .Rcfolution to propagate Religion and 
 G 2 Piervi 
 
[ 100 ] 
 
 Piety, to form theMinds, correfl thePaf- 
 fions, and cultivate the Virtues of their 
 Hearers -, to be indefatigable in vifiting 
 and comforting the Sick •, and, as far as 
 Circumftances would admit, to be liberal 
 to the Poor j to be (that their Example 
 might enforce their Dodrine) tender Fa- 
 thers, afFedionate Hufbands, kind Pa- 
 llors, fociable Friends, peaceful Neigh- 
 bours, and loyal Subje6ls ; moderate in 
 their Enjoymentsy humble in their De- 
 portment, and chafte in their Converfa- 
 tion. 
 
 Under thefe Reftridions I have known 
 very few above the Degree of Curates 
 reach this Place-, and, to confefs the 
 Truth, Lawn Sleeves would have exclu- 
 ded me, but that feveral of my Deficien- 
 cies were over-looked, on Account of my 
 uncommon Attachment to the Lunar 
 World. As to Lawyers, they are gene- 
 rally excluded j for none are allowed En- 
 trance 
 
trance, unlefs they can prove that, to the 
 befl of their Knowledge, they have al- 
 ways been upon the Side of Juftice, and 
 never confidered the Fee before their 
 Client. Physicians, as fuch, are re- 
 je6led ; but extraordinary Qualifications 
 gain them Admittance ; and all Military 
 Perfons, as turbulent, dangerous Animals, 
 incompatible with a Region of Peace, are 
 excluded without Exception. 
 
 Here a confufed Noife of feveral Per- 
 fons calling out in the Square interrupt- 
 ed our Converfation, the Meaning of 
 which will appear in the enfuing Chap- 
 ter. 
 
 G £ CHAP, 
 
[ 102 ] 
 
 CHAP. VI. 
 
 The Manner of fwmmoning the Noiblants" 
 to the Temple ; Ceremonies f reparative 
 to entering the Temple ; and the Charge 
 
 given before Admiffion. ^ome Account 
 
 of the NoiBLAN Religion ; Ohferva- 
 tions upon Earthly Places of Worfhip\ 
 the Namredal'j Plan for new modelling 
 the Ecclejiajlics /;2 England. 
 
 THOSE Perfons, you hear, fays the 
 Namredal, are Snerrunets to 
 theSALMiNA, Servitors to the Temple ; 
 they are now fummoning the People to 
 the Vespers, and the Words they Ufe 
 areNoiGLEVER Genvela, h^ grateful to 
 God. Every one obeys this Call, and you 
 will immediately have an Opportunity of 
 I'ecingthe Noielan Method of Vv^orfliip. 
 Coire, go with me, the Citizens are in 
 
 waiting to condudl us. 
 
 As 
 
[ 103 ] 
 
 As tFie Ceremonies mull be new and 
 fomewhat unintelligible to you, your bell 
 Method will be to follow the Motions of 
 others, do what you fee done, and in your 
 own Heart, after your own Manner and 
 Ideas, pay Adoration to the Supreme Di- 
 rector of all Things ; his Praife and Glory 
 is the ultimate End of all that deferves the 
 Name of Religion. Sincerity of Inten- 
 tion is the firll and principal Recommen- 
 dation toDivine Acceptance, which it will 
 certainly obtain : It is not the Splendor 
 nor the worldly Value of an Offering, but 
 the Affedion and Duty of him who pre- 
 fents it, that can pleale an Omnipotent- 
 Receiver. 
 
 Pafling thro' a confiderable Number of 
 attending Citizens, we went forward to 
 the Temple -, in our Way I could not but 
 admire the extremely neat Regularity of 
 the Streets, and the uniform Compa6lnefs 
 ot the HoufeSj which will be fpoken of 
 
 mora^ 
 
r 104 ] 
 
 more at large hereafter. Coming near 
 the Place of Worfhip, I perceived it to 
 be a mod fpacious fexagonal Building, 
 rifing into a magnificent Dome ; it flood 
 upon a green Eminence of confiderable 
 Height, over the Sides of which flowed 
 feveral fportive Rills of Water^ fo tranf- 
 parent, that its Sparkles out-£hone the 
 Luflre of our highell-polifh'd Diamonds. 
 
 The Temple was conflru6bed of a 
 Stone refemblingEMERALD, united with 
 Cement of a Gold Colour -, the Dome 
 appeared to be of Chryftal, fupported by 
 a vaft Number of Pillars of the Ame- 
 THisT Hue, with Capitals and Bafis of 
 the purefl White ; the Order of Archi- 
 tedure appeared very different from any 
 I had ever feen, and exhibited to View 
 fomewhat elegantly Angular, preferving 
 aChaftnefs of Grandeur not to be found 
 in the groffer Materials of terreftrial 
 Magnificence. 
 
 Having 
 
[ 105 ] 
 
 Having entered the Are a of the Tem* 
 PLE, the Namredal, and all who at- 
 tended him, went to feveral Bafons of 
 tranfparent. Saffron -coloured Stone, dip- 
 ped their Heads into Water, wafhed their 
 Hands, and dried both with Cloths of- 
 fered them by Servants of the Church : I 
 did fo likewife ; when ftraight we entered 
 a moft beautiful and fpacious Isle, where 
 we were no fooner placed, than inftanta- 
 ncoudy fuch a thick impenetrable Dark- 
 nefs wrapped us round, that I could by 
 no Means fee thole Perfons who flood 
 dole by : At the fame Time, from above, 
 below, and every Side, the moft difmal 
 Sounds, undulating thro' the Building, 
 ftruck my aftonifhed Ears, and, I may 
 add, intimidated me not a little. On 
 one Side Torment fcreamed hideoufly, 
 and on another Defpair vented her la- 
 mentable Groans. This lafted between 
 five and ten Minutes j when, as quick as 
 Thought, the inner Part of the Temple 
 
 opening. 
 
[ io6 ] 
 
 opening, fuch a Flood of Light burfl 
 iipon us, from many Thoufands of Chry- 
 flal Lamps, that my Eyes could hardly 
 bear fo powerful a Contrail : The doleful 
 Howlings were changed into Melody that 
 might almofl be called Celellial. This 
 odd and flriking Ceremony I found to 
 mean, that as all created Beings are im- 
 perfe6t in Ibme Degree by Nature, and 
 more by Pradice, Juftice would condemn 
 them to the Seat of Mourning, but in- 
 finite Mercy, fatisfied with temporary Pu- 
 nifliments for temporary Crimes, opens 
 the Gates of Blifs and takes them in. — 
 This EcARuocNE, or Ceremony of Re- 
 membrance, is performed once a Week, 
 to imprefs a deeper Senfc of Duty and 
 Devotion ; to deter the Worfhippers from 
 Vice, as they wifli not to continue in the 
 Gloom of Miferyj and to urge them to- 
 Virtue, as they hope for a fpeedy Admif- 
 iion into the Sun-fhine of Joy. 
 
[ 107 1 
 
 Three AvozENS, habited in graceful 
 and awful Robes, now approached from^ 
 the inner Temple, at which all theCon- 
 gregation bowed to the Earth ; the elder 
 of the three, fupported by the other two, 
 fpoke, as I was informed afterwards, in 
 the following Manner : 
 
 Children of God^ I charge ye in his holy 
 and tremendous Name^ (and remember that 
 before him you cannot diffemble) if any cor- 
 rupt 'Thoughts at prefent taint your Breafls ; 
 if there be any one among you who is not in 
 the mofi unlimited and perfe£i Peace with all 
 his Fellow-Citizens ; if there be any Parents 
 who are not tender of their Children \ any 
 Children who fail in Refpe5i and Duty to 
 their Parents \ if there be here a tyrannical 
 Hufhand^ or abandoned Wife^ begone •, pre- 
 fume not to defile this holy Place with your 
 unhallowed Steps \ but hide your Heads in 
 Darknefs^ veil your Eyes with Tears^ clothe 
 your Hearts with Mournings and gird your 
 
 Loins 
 
[ io8 ] 
 
 Lcins with Penitence^ till you become pure 
 in his Sights whofe Eye heareth not a Stain. 
 This^ in the Name of our Almighty Sire, I 
 command \ but if you be free from thefe cri- 
 minal Pollutions, by the fame Authority I ad- 
 mit you to prejent yourfelves before him in 
 this f acred Place, with joyful Humiliation^ 
 an Offering fit for Heaven, 
 
 Having thus fpoke he retired, and the 
 Congregation followed, again proflrating 
 themfelves upon entering the innerTEM- 
 PLE. How pleafmg would it be, thought 
 I, to fee fuch a Number of Perfons upon 
 Earth daring to approach their Creator, 
 upon the fame Principles, and under the 
 fame Reftridlions ? How could our Fa- 
 shion-Mongers, who go to criticife up- 
 on Drefs, bear fuch a Tefl ? How could 
 the Sons and Daughters of Gallantry, 
 who go to Church to worfhip one ano- 
 ther, endure fuch a Trial? — O uncourtlv 
 
 *■ 
 
 NoiBLANS, who banifli Compliments, 
 
 ^ ogling 
 
t J09 ] 
 
 ogling Smiles, and all Politenefs out of 
 Religion. 
 
 Divine Service now began, and con- 
 tinued with ftriking Solemnity near an 
 Hour, the Congregation fometimes pro- 
 flrated, at others kneeling, and then 
 {landing. — Sitting is not allowed, it be- 
 ing obferved, that if the Namredal has 
 fo much Refped: paid him, as that none 
 prefume to fit in his Prefence, it mull be 
 deemed a mod unbecoming Inflance of 
 Impiety to take that Freedom before 
 Him who is universal Lord and Fa- 
 ther of ALL. 
 
 The Senior Avozen having concluded 
 with a very pathetic Benedidlion, we de- 
 parted. The Snerrunets, as wepafTed 
 thro' the Ifle of the Temple, calling 
 
 out, Maginleh Ndfina^ y time y elver en^ 
 
 phazaz vjal Sezived : Re?nember the 
 
 Mediator 
 
[ iio ] 
 
 JHediator is in your Houfes^ and fees all your 
 Thoughts as well as Anions, 
 
 From Vespers we went to the Nam- 
 re dal's Houfe, and, being feated in a 
 Kind of Saloon, I entered into an Inquiry- 
 concerning thePrinciples of theNoiELAN 
 Religion. « 
 
 The chief Points of it, fays he, are. 
 That they beheve a fingle undivided 
 Divinity, indefcribable, incomprehen- 
 fible, to whofe Appearance they adapt 
 no Form, to whofe Attributes they pre- 
 fcribe no Bounds : They never confider 
 him as an angry, vindidive Being; for 
 That, according to their Notions, would 
 be to fuppofe him fubjed to Paffions, 
 and confequently imperfed: They fay 
 he beftows from Benevolence, pardons 
 from Mercy, and corredls from the fame 
 amiable Principles : That as by infinite 
 Wisdom he knows all created Beings to 
 
 be 
 
[ "I ] 
 
 be fallible, he will try them according to 
 their Capacities and Opportunities : That 
 he will not punifli the Failings of real 
 Weaknefs, nor reward untempted Rec- 
 titude. To defign well, and to refift 
 Temptation conftitutes Virtue, as to a6t 
 under Self-convidlion, and to indulge 
 pernicious PafTions is of the Eflence of 
 Vice. 
 
 In this IsL AN D it appears a moft flrange 
 and partial Notion to fix one Place of 
 Abode, one Degree of Punifhment, and 
 that eternal, for all Sinners. They be- 
 lieve in and worfhip aNALSiNA, or Me- 
 diator, whom they fuppofe to be form- 
 ed and appointed by God for the Sake 
 of erring Creatures ; that he is coeval 
 with the Univerfe, for which, however, 
 they do not fix an JEra,^ taking fuch a 
 Difquifition to be both unprofitable and 
 prefumptuous : That he has the Perfec- 
 tions of a Deity, except that he is liable 
 
 to 
 
[ 112 ] 
 
 to the Paffions of Grief and Joy ; the one 
 caufed by obilinate Sinners, the other by 
 contrite ones. TheReafon they affign for 
 the Exiftence and Belief of fuch a Me- 
 diator is, that the pure undefiled EiTence 
 of Divinity being incompatible with the 
 corrupt Breath of Sin, this Medium has 
 been formed, that the Nalsina may 
 more particularly fuperintend the A6lions 
 of Mortals, receive their Petitions, and 
 fupplicate for them to the Throne of 
 Grace. 
 
 Once each Day at lead every Perfon is 
 obliged to attend public Worfhip, and 
 no fchifmatical Notions are allowed to be 
 propagated ^ tho' every Man is at Libcry 
 to judge for himfelf, if he decently com- 
 plies with eftablifhed Cuftoms -, nor do 
 they think that any Variation from their 
 Syftem, if grounded upon pious Prin- 
 ciples, will injure future Happinefs. All 
 thofe, moreover, tran dated from Earth, 
 
 who 
 
[113 ] 
 
 who are not naturalized, are indulged in 
 purfuing the Modes they pradifed in 
 their former Exiilence, if it be agreeable 
 to thcmfelves. 
 
 I obferved, continued he, that the 
 Grandeur of ourTfiMPLE ftruckyou; nor 
 is it furprizing in a Place where every 
 other Building, except the House of Ju- 
 stice, bears a fimple, unadorned, hum- 
 ble Equality ; buttheNoiBLANS think it 
 ferves to create a greater and more awful 
 Refped: to the Divinity to whom it is 
 dedicated ; it is to influence themfelves, 
 not to gratify their God ; for they are 
 perfuadcd that Works of Piety are as fra- 
 grant, and of as muchEftimation from the 
 lowly Cottage as the moil towering Edi- 
 fice.— How different is this Principle and 
 Pradice of the Noiblans from what I re- 
 member to have obferv'd in England, where 
 mod of the Noblemen's Stables are Build- 
 ings fuperior to many of the Churches ? 
 
 H This 
 
[ lU ] 
 
 This lafl Remark I could not help ao- 
 rknovvledging to be as much adapted- to 
 'the prefent as to any preceding Times, 
 and exprelTed my Concern that it fhould 
 be iOy when, among innumerable other 
 •public Extravagancies, between Eight 
 •and Ten Thoufand Pounds yearly, be- 
 
 - fides Matches, are given and fubfcribed 
 for Horfes to run one another to Death, 
 
 . and to impoverilli the Breed of thofe. ufe- 
 ful Creatures, who, for Sake of Speed, are 
 reduced to meer Baubles : That lb jufl a 
 
 ; Complaint fhould have Place, when, at a 
 random Guefs, Two Hundred Thoufand 
 Pounds annually are lavifh'din over-grown 
 
 . Salaries, or Stipends, to Churchmen who 
 
 - never officiate •, while feveral of thofe, who 
 . toil and labour inceffantly in the Paftoral 
 i Office, as well as many of the Places of 
 
 Worfhip, are pitiable Objedls of Poverty. 
 
 True, fays he, it is a Point of mofl jufl 
 and rational Concern -, as to thofe Bounties 
 
 which 
 
[ ^^5 ] 
 
 which only promote the Spirit of Gaming, 
 or, in phiiner Terms, the Spirit of picking 
 one another's Pockets, they are, inflead of 
 Praife, highly deferving of Cenfure j yet 
 even they, confidering fome Advantages 
 to Trade accruing from the Money that 
 circulates at public Meetings, are not fo 
 heavy nor unjuftifiable a Tax upon So- 
 ciety as the other Evil that was complain- 
 ed of. 
 
 What the Reafon, what the Motive 
 may be for making and continuing fo 
 many exorbitant Church Livings, no Man 
 can tell, unlefs they be defigned to make 
 the Ministers of Religion mercenary 
 Tools of Government. Why fhould any 
 Man, by anyEvafion whatever, be enabled 
 to hold Pluralities ? Why is not one Li- 
 ving deemed fufficient for one Teacher? 
 Why not one Parish, if fmall, ferved by 
 one Minister, at One hundred and fifty 
 Pounds a Year ? Or, if large, b;' two, 
 
 H 2 each 
 
[ I16 ] 
 
 each having fo much ? Why might not 
 Bishops (for fuch Fathers or Infpeftors 
 I think necefTary) officiate for One thou- 
 land, and their immediate AlTiflants, 
 Deans, at Five hundred ? Why fhould 
 thofe, who ought to be intirely devoted 
 to Spiritual Matters, fit among Temporal 
 Lords, and, bufying themfelves about a 
 prefent State, entering into the Cabals 
 and Factions of Policy, lofe Thoughts of 
 a future ? Why Ihould fo many Preben- 
 daries and Dignitaries, who are other- 
 wife well provided for, crufli Velvet Cu- 
 ihions in the Stalls of Cathedral Churches, 
 and annually fweep away fuch monftrous 
 Sums ? Why fhould a Man, the higher 
 he goes in Church Preferment, be the 
 lefs alTiduous ? 
 
 Surely thefe Points well deferve to be 
 confidered, and loudly call for Reforma- 
 _tion. — 'Tis true the Labourer is worthy of 
 hisHx'?^ but not of Superfluity, and cer- 
 tainly 
 
[ '"7 ] 
 
 tainly that Man in common Life would 
 be deemed very weak, who gave extra- 
 ordinary Wages to a Parcel of idle Fel- 
 lows, merely to (land as Lookers-on ; 
 while he half-ftarved the induftrioiis Part, 
 that carefully and laborioully fulfilled 
 their Duty. Befides, continues he, there 
 is, in the Eledlion ofaBiSHOP, fomethino- 
 fo farcical, that, were it not a Jeft upon 
 Religion, it muft excite Laughter: To 
 enter upon Choice, when the Choice is 
 abfolutely fixed before-hand, makes it 
 one of Hopson's Kind •, and what we may 
 deem yet more ridiculous, is the Nega- 
 tive three I'imes pronounced to a Digni- 
 ty which the i'^;;^^/^? Creature, by himfelf 
 and his Friends, has poiTibly, for many 
 Years together, been labouring to gain. 
 
 The N A mredal's Sentiments moll 
 perfeftly coinciding witli mine, I told him 
 it would be a great Service to Religion, 
 and a diftinguiflied Honour to the Policy 
 
 H 3 of 
 
[ 1.8 ] 
 
 of Government, if fuch Complaints could 
 be redrefled, and thefe Affairs fettled up- 
 on a permanent and equitable Footing. 
 
 I think, replies he, after long and fe- 
 rious Confideration, that they mighty and 
 I fhall briefly fketch out the Scheme by 
 which fo defirable a Purpofe might be 
 brought about. You will, no Doubt, 
 find me faUible in fome Points ; but I 
 hope not in many, nor material ones. 
 
 Obferve then, firft. That I would have 
 the King a6t merely as Defender of the 
 Church i by his Magifterial Authority to 
 protedl it from naturalized Foes, and by 
 the Force of his Arms to fhield it from 
 foreign Attacks ; by no Means to inter- 
 fere in the Choice of Paftors, as his nu- 
 merous Avocations to other Matters can- 
 not afford him Time to examine into the 
 Characters and Abihties of thofe he is to 
 appoint J for which Reafon he is under 
 
 the 
 
[ 1^9 J 
 
 tlTeNecefTityoftakingRecommendations: 
 from the Tribe of Courtiers, Vv'ho at all 
 Events pufh on their own Relations and 
 Dependents. This would pofTibly be 
 deemed a Circumfcription of Royal Pre- 
 roo-Jtive : but nothin.Q; lure that tends to 
 promote Religion and Virtue can take 
 from real Dignity; it muft rather give 
 additional Luftre, and verify a Maxim 
 which fays, "That Limitation often Jlreiigtb-. 
 ens Power, 
 
 I would recommend a total Annihila- 
 tion of all Right to Prefentations, either 
 in Bishops, Chapters, Colleges, or 
 private Perfons : This might be called 
 an Attack upon private Property •, — but 
 I afk,^ What Property ? Do fome Hun- 
 dreds or Thoufands a Year enable a Man 
 to chufe out a proper Guide for his Fel- 
 low-Creatures ? Few People, I believe, 
 would chufe a blind Friend to fix on the 
 Perfon of a Wife, or the Situation of a 
 
 Houfe : 
 
C I20 ] 
 
 Houfe : Why then in the much more ma- 
 terial Concern of being wedded to Futu- 
 rity, or in the Choice of an eternal Dwel- 
 ling, lliould Men, blind with Ignorance 
 or Avarice, which is too often the Cafe,, 
 claim any Right to chufe ? If they fell their 
 Eledtion to a Living, it is a mean and 
 fcandalous Infult upon Religion, and 
 therefore ought to be abolifhed ; if they 
 have no lucrative View, they may eafily 
 give up the Privilege to more competent 
 judges. 
 
 To prevent Murmurings, as Men are 
 apt to think what they have once enjoyed 
 is their indifputable Right, the prefent 
 Sons of the Church, I mean fuch as have 
 a fufficient Provifion," fhould enjoy their 
 feveral Stipends for Lifej but as they fell 
 off, the proportionate Divifion I have 
 mentioned Ihould take Place, with all 
 convenient Speed, among their Succef- 
 
 fors. 
 
 The 
 
' [ 121 ] 
 
 The Clergy of each Diocese, in 
 Convocation alTembled, fhould, upon a 
 Vacancy, chule from among themfelves 
 the Bishop or Dean of the faid Diocese, 
 being firfl fworn that no previous Appli- 
 cation from any Perfon, no partial Regard 
 of Confanguinity or Friendfhip, but the 
 unbiafled Opinion of real Defervings, 
 fwayed their Choice. Indeed, as the Bi- 
 shop and Dean would have no Power of 
 increafing their Incomes, there would be 
 but little Chance of Partiality. 
 
 As to all other Ministers; upon the 
 Death of an Incumbent Application 
 jQiould be made to the Colleges for a 
 Student in Divinity to fill up the 
 Place i who, being recommended by them 
 to the Bishop, jQiould be examined by 
 him, the Dean, and fix other Clergy- 
 men, and, if approved by them, ordained 
 and inflituted. This Method of grant- 
 ing no Orders till a Vacancy happened, 
 
 would 
 
[ ^22 ] 
 
 would prevent fuch Shoals from feeking ^ 
 Shelter and Subfiftence in the Gown,", 
 where too often they find Indigence. 
 
 The above Scheme, which you may ■ 
 ripen in your Thoughts, diminifh, en- 
 large, or rejedl as you fee fit, would be 
 produ6tive of feveral great and defirable 
 Advantages, if carried into Execution: 
 Firft, it would cut off all Adulation, 
 Cringing, and mean Dependence from 
 the Miniflerial Fundlion ; Men of Morals 
 and Learning would be the fole Judges 
 of Perfons fit for their Brotherhood, not 
 the ignorant mercenary Fools of Fortune. 
 If the Robes of Divinity then ever enter- 
 ed the Chambers of Great Men, it would 
 be with a proper independent Relped: ; . 
 they would then, as Ministers, be only 
 Servants of their Pleavenly Mailer, ha- 
 ving nothing to v/ifh or fear of this 
 World's Circumflances, their Thoughts 
 might and would be more devoted to a 
 
 future > 
 
[ 123 ] 
 
 future i their Tongues might then, with 
 honeft and unprejudicial Opennefs, tell 
 efTential Truths, however uncourtty. In 
 fhort, being in a Manner felf-exiftent, in 
 Comparifon of their prefent Condition, 
 Obedience to National Laws excepted, 
 and being totally debarred of all political 
 Refle6lions and Remarks in their Preach- 
 ing, they would become a much more re- 
 fpedable Part of the Conflitution, and 
 more properly fulfil the facredTitle ofMi- 
 nifters of God's JVord. As they are now fi- 
 tuated,'tis very much to be fear'd that too 
 many are rather Retailers of the Words, 
 and Flatterers of the Vanities of Men. 
 
 Another great Advantage from the 
 Equality propofed, would be the faving 
 a great Sum annually from the prefent 
 Church Revenues •, which, being ap- 
 plied to the building or rebuilding of 
 Churches, would furnifh what might be 
 called decent Places of Worlhip in every 
 
 Spot, 
 
[124 ] 
 
 spot, and would alfo contribute much to 
 eafe the Poor*s Rates. No flight Confi- 
 deration, where fuch weighty and multi- 
 tudinous Taxes prevail as in England j 
 Taxes which, tho' framed hy a National 
 Council, are, generally fpeaking, more 
 unequally levied there than in any other 
 known State. 
 
 C H A P. VII. 
 
 Meets two Females \ quejlioned hy thm con- 
 cerning the Vmo'li^m Ladies; Remarks 
 /^(pi?;^ Fashion; Dram aticWriters 5 
 the prefent ones^ and Theatres confi- 
 dered, 
 
 I Know not to what Length of Conver- 
 fation our Zeal, in regard of Churches 
 and Churchmen, would have carried us, 
 had not a blooming Youth of about Fif- 
 teen acquainted us that Supper was rea- 
 dy j when the Namredal faid, Now 
 
 . you 
 
[ r25 1 
 
 you fhall fee our private Method of Li- 
 ving, which is the fame in all Houfes, 
 my Office of Magiflrate only confines me 
 to the Fatigue of Ceremony at Dinner, 
 at other Times I am in the Family- Way. 
 
 Here I was concluded into another 
 Apartment, where was fet a fmall Table 
 and a very moderate Repaft of Fruits and 
 Vegetables ; foon after us two Females, 
 of very pleafmg and refpe6table Forms, 
 came in, quite plain, but extremely neat 
 in Drefs : The Namredal prefenting 
 me to the lirft, laid. This is the Great 
 Elizabeth of England-, I would have 
 paid Obeifance on my Knee, but flie re- 
 marked, with mod delicate Affability, 
 that her prefent State of Exiftence hap- 
 pily claimed no fuch Reipe6t j faid flie 
 was highly pleafed at feeing a Country- 
 man, and that after Supper fhe had many 
 <Vu€ftions to all<:. Being introduced to 
 •the other Female, I found flie was the 
 
 Nam- 
 
[126] 
 
 Namredal's Wife. — Take Notice that 
 Perfons tranflated from Earth are not, 
 like theNoiBLANs, limited to a particu- 
 lar Age for Marriage ; but, if naturalized, 
 may chufe when and whom, as may be 
 molt agreeable. 
 
 Confcious of being unacquainted with 
 the Cufloms of Salutation, I paufed for 
 fome Time in a State of diffident Confu- 
 fion •, which my kind Inftru6lor percei- 
 ving — Blufh not, fays he, at being igno- 
 rant of what, before now, you could not 
 pofTibly be acquainted with ; Ridicule 
 is a bitter Weed that rarely fhoots up in 
 Noibla; we do not, like the Malevolent 
 in your World, wound Modefty with 
 cruel unfeafonabie Sneers and Laughter^ 
 on the contrary, we give with Pleafure 
 all poflible Information to thofe who may 
 inadvertently do wrong. 
 
 How ignorantly inhuman is it to dart 
 
 the .Stings of Ridicule at a Perfon for 
 
 • taking 
 
T 127 ] 
 
 taking Steps too long or too (hort ; turn- 
 •ing Toes in infbead of out; drooping the 
 Head inflead of holding it eredt -, or 
 dangling the Arms inflead of dilpofing 
 them according to Art! Why lliould a 
 volatile Frenchman laugh at the more 
 temperate Briton for Gravity, or the 
 •Briton vent his Spleen at a Spaniard 
 for Formality, and at a Dutchman for 
 his wide Breeches ? Indeed if any one of 
 thofe Articles made a Man better or 
 worfe, they would deferve Re+nark ; but 
 as every Nation has its Virtues, and I be- 
 lieve the fame may alfo be faid of every 
 ■Individual, fome few Oddities, or what 
 ieem fo, fhould be overlooked, or cor- 
 rected with Tendernefs. 
 
 But, continues he, I am going too far; 
 -know that our Method of Salutation be- 
 tween the different Sexes is, the Man 
 holds his Hand over the Female's Head, 
 ovitJiout touching, and fays, A% Firlui? 
 
 and 
 
[ 128 ] I 
 
 nndCo'iiftdncy evey' flour iftj : — To which fiic 
 replies, her Right Hand pointing to her 
 Left Bread, With Love and Obedience. — 
 This is the whole of Ceremony, and only 
 ufed once each Day, let them meet ever 
 fo often. 
 
 Here we fat down to Supper, the Nj\m- 
 REDAL having invoked aBlefling. Du- 
 ring the whole we fat filent as at Dinner, 
 and, having finilhcd, performed the fame 
 Ablution. We were attended by two 
 Boys and two Girls, Children of the Nam- 
 REDAL-, who, after Thanks returned, re- 
 moved every Thing with a pleafing Dex- 
 terity ; when my kind Hoil broke Silence 
 in the following Manner : 
 
 As we are all acquainted with English, 
 fays he, we will converfe in that Lan- 
 guage •, I know that, were it not for Cuf- 
 tom, whofe arbitrary Power renders ZNtx^ 
 Thing more bearable, the Ceremony of 
 
 Silence 
 
[ 129 ] 
 Silence at Meal-Times would be deemed 
 as great a Hardlliip by the Females ot 
 NoiBLA, as it muft be to the Females of 
 the nether World •, even now, Ladies, I 
 know your Tongues are itching for Li- 
 berty, fo e*en let them loofe. 
 
 Upon my Word, Sir Namredal, re- 
 plies Elizabeth, you Ihall be called to 
 Account if you are fo tart upon our Sex-, 
 don't you know that Talking is our Pri- 
 vilege here as well as on Earth; nay, let 
 iiie tell you, if once roufed up, we can 
 think and ad: too ; but you Lordly Crea- 
 tures, called Men, would make Cyphers 
 of us •, that was the Reafon I always flood 
 by myfelf, and made fome of my Brother 
 Monarchs know that the Policy and 
 Reiolution of a Woman is as much to be 
 feared as thole of Men ; come. Sir, fays 
 Ihe, this is no Magiftrate in his own 
 Houfe, fo, for all his Gravity, we'll be as 
 prattling as we pleafe. 
 
 I With 
 
[130 ] 
 
 With all my Heart, replies the Nam- 
 red al, my Gravity can't have more a- 
 greeable Relaxation, and, to prove it, Fil 
 make one among you •, fo let us hear what 
 you'll propofe for our Entertainment. 
 
 Here, addrejfTing herfelf to me, (he faid, 
 I was fo much fatigued with PoHtics while 
 on Earth, that I flian't trouble you with 
 many Queilions that Way -, yet I fhould 
 be glad to know whether Liberty ftill 
 iiouriihes as it did while I held the Reins 
 of Government : To this replying in the 
 Affirmative, and that an equal if not a 
 fuperior Share of Military Fame attend- 
 ed the British Arms, fhe feemed parti- 
 cularly pleafed , and then afl<:ed me about 
 herCountry women, whatVirtues and Foi- 
 bles at prefent prevailed amongft them. 
 
 This Interrogatory occafioned fome 
 Hefitation ♦, Madam, fays I, to fpeak the 
 Truth will rather appear Severity, and I 
 
 would 
 
[ 131 ] 
 
 would not willingly enter into a Mifre- 
 prefcntation by falfe Softening and mif- 
 applied TendeTnefsj I (hall fketch out a 
 Pidure as like the Originals as my Ob- 
 fervation and Fancy will admit, in which 
 Light I hope you will candidly receive it. 
 
 Certainly, fays llie ; it is not the Cuf- 
 tom to difguife Truth here in regard to 
 either Sex ; it is told, contrary to the old 
 English Proverb, at all Times and in 
 all Places, therefore you cannot oblige 
 us more than to adhere ftri(5lly to it; for 
 hov/ever we might wifn our Sifters thro' 
 the Univerfe to do as they ought, yet to 
 relate the Vices or Follies of any Part, 
 cannot pofnbly give Offence. 
 
 Thus encouraged, I proceeded : The 
 Ladies of England, Madam, as you 
 muft remember, taken in a general View 
 of natural Qualifications, Perfons, Fea- 
 tures, and Underftandings, are excelled 
 I 2 bv 
 
I 132 1 
 
 by none-, and I believe, did they not 
 take extraordinary Pains to raife up Ap- 
 pearances againfr Reputation, they might 
 juftly claim an exalted Share of Virtue; 
 but a ftrange, unaccountable Frenzy, 
 called Fashion, fo intoxicates their 
 Brain, .that almofl every Confideration 
 is facrificed to the ridiculous'W.orfhip of 
 that Idol ; which has given fuch unlimit- 
 ed Sway, that if. a Hujfband, Father, or 
 Guardian, pretends to find Fault and ad- 
 vife, he is immediately filenced by that 
 powerful Word; the extraordinary Ef- 
 fedls of which you will more fully com- 
 prehend, by fketching the Outlines of a 
 fine Lady's Life. 
 
 It has been juflly obferved, that a well- 
 regulated Referve and Modeity are the 
 chief Points of Beauty in a Female Cha- 
 racter ; but this Opinion Fashion has 
 totally overthrown, and ftigmatiz'd them 
 mith the Terms of unbred Sheepifhnefs ; 
 
 while 
 
[ 133 ] 
 
 while a Ihamelefs Front, flaring Eye?, 
 wandering Limbs, and nonfenfical Voci- 
 feration, ullirp the Titles of Elegance, 
 Eafe, and Wit; thefe admirable Qtulifi- 
 cations are feen to a confiderable Degree, 
 even in fingle Females, but arife to fo 
 eminent a Pitch of Perfe6tion in married 
 ones, that it would almod occafion an 
 Obferver to believe they only confidered 
 Matrimony as a Licence to free them 
 from every rational Re{lri6lion, as a Paff- 
 port to carry them tiiro' the Paths of Li- 
 centioufnefs ; to fuch, all Men are alike 
 but their Flufbands, they indeed find 
 Coldnefs and Referve enough: But thefe 
 are general Remarks, I mufl come more 
 within the Bounds of a particular Cha- 
 racter, which cannot be better flruck out 
 than by giving you the daily Difpofition 
 of Time. 
 
 In this Point, I know not well where, 
 
 or how to begin, as a fafliionable Lady 
 
 I 3 has 
 
[ ^34 ] 
 
 has no Morning: Let it fufiice to fay flie 
 gets up at Noon, or after it ; receives 
 and reads Cards of Compliment during 
 Breakfaft; takes her Chair or Chariot, 
 and tires both the Men and Horfes in 
 galloping from Street to Street, to pay 
 what they call Morning Vifits; then re- 
 turns and dines in the Evening, drinks 
 Tea at Night, and plays Cards, Supper- 
 Time excepted, till the next Day is ad- 
 vanced. This, with fome very incon- 
 fiderable Variations, is the continual 
 Round of Tafte and Elegance. 
 
 I perceiv'd a Face of Ailonllliment pof- 
 fefs Elizabeth at this Defcription, 
 while theNAMREDAL's Lady queftioned 
 me, whether the Hufbands purfued the 
 fame Courfe of Living ; I told her many 
 of them did ; but took Care not to dif- 
 grace themfelves, or Wives, by appear- 
 ing at the fame Places. Matrimony 
 with them is'fomewhat like a Country- 
 Dance, 
 
Dance, where, tho' you have a fct Part- 
 ner, you as often dance up to thofe of 
 your Neighbours, and fo change about. 
 
 Aye! faysfiie. And pray what domeftic 
 Happinefs can fuch. Couples enjoy? What 
 Cordiality, what mutual Satisfadion ? 
 How can they pofTibly fulfill the Duty, or 
 feel the tender Senfaticns of Parents ? 
 None of thole Points, Madam, I replied, 
 are of the lead Concern among Perfons 
 of palite Tafte •, fuch mean Confiderations 
 are referred to the vulgar, rudicated Part 
 of Mankind, never admitted amongfl the 
 more polifhed Allemblies : Befides, they 
 are fo infatuated with foreign Frippery, 
 that fcarce any Thing which is not origi- 
 nally devifed among our inveterate and 
 conitant Foes will go down. Meat, 
 Clothes, and Manners, are.fo adulterated, 
 that I dare fay this Lady, who once 
 fvvayed the Brilip Sceptre with fuch iilu- 
 llrious Merit, were fhe to return, would 
 
 fcarce 
 
[ 136 ] 
 
 fcarcc be able to dlfcover any one Cir- 
 cumftance that could bring her Country- 
 women to Remembrance. 
 
 No truly, returns Elizabeth, not by 
 the Account you give of them -, there was 
 fuch a Thing as Fashion in my Reign, 
 and it frequently varied, which, for Sake 
 of Trade and Manufactures, fliould un- 
 doubtedly be encouraged in Ibme Mea- 
 fure ♦, but I do not recoiled that ever it 
 went to fuch a pernicious Length : It con- 
 tributed to a reafonable Pleafure, but not 
 an idolatrous Pride : Night and Day took 
 their regular Turns among all Ranks of 
 People, nor did any Degree of Quality 
 exempt a Woman from due Attention ta 
 domeftic Concerns. This did not pre- 
 vent Hours of Relaxation and commend- 
 able Amufement; but, giving an Edge to 
 Appetite, rendered them more pleafing, 
 at the fame Time that Regularity gave 
 Spirit to the Features, Vivacity to the 
 
 Dif- 
 
[ 137 ] 
 
 Dilpofitions, and Health to the Conftitu- 
 tions of my Countrywomen. Certainly, 
 yonrfafhionable Ladies, as you ftilethem, 
 have very little of the healthful Bloom in 
 their Countenances, and, while lubjed to 
 the VicilTitudes of Gaming, they mufl: 
 frequently diftort their Features into very 
 frightful Forms. I fhould think to pre- 
 fent them with Mirrors, during a Run 
 of very bad Luck, would deter them from 
 fuch contemptible and pernicious Prac- 
 tices, unlefs indeed the Spirit of plunder- 
 ing themfelves and others happens to be 
 more prevalent than the Confideration ot 
 their Beauty. 
 
 Well obferved, fays the Namredal, 
 1 have liflened to the Remarks on every 
 Side, and think them juft ; but, furely, 
 continues he, the Men muft be of a widely 
 different Call, elfe the Nation could never 
 be in fuch Repute, nor crowned with 
 fuchMilitary Fame as you have defcribed. 
 
 I 
 
[138] . 
 
 lanrwered, that, in general, they provi- 
 dentially were fo, for the Defence and 
 Support of Liberty ; but that many of 
 the Nobility in particular, and other 
 Nurfelings of Fortune, afpiring at the 
 Chara61:er of Fine Gentlemen, ad: up- 
 on Principles diametrically oppofite. 
 
 Aye there, replies he, lies the Partiality ' 
 and difgraceful Inconvenience of Here- 
 ditary Honours •, by which the mofl con- 
 temptible Wretch, if he be born a Lord, 
 continues fo, and claims Precedence of 
 manyThoufands better than himfelfj tho', 
 ufurping the Poft of a Jockey, with pi- 
 tiful Ambition, he fcampers over the 
 Turf, or, in the Semblance of a Game- 
 ster, rattles the Dice, ftill his Nobi- 
 lity of Blood confecrates, as it were, fuch 
 Bafenefs, and gives the Wretch an un- 
 merited and dangerous Importance. 
 
 Now, Shame upon it, — Did Reason ever 
 authorize fuch Principles ? No, certainly, 
 
 rather 
 
[ 139 ] 
 
 rather Vice in the Garb of Reafon, know- 
 ing her own Deformity, has run for Shel- 
 ther under the Glare of Political Honours, 
 - which may render her true Shape lefs 
 perceptible, and confequently lefs fright- 
 ful. If Rank were to be the Refult of ap- 
 proved Merit only, it would much more 
 juftly and univerfally claim Refped. In 
 the prefent Difpofition of Things, tho' 
 it ferves to awe the Vulgar, in the View 
 of fenfible Men, it does but refled Scan- 
 dal upon the unworthy PofTefTor^. 
 
 Several other Queflions were afked al- 
 ternately by the Namredal, his Wife, 
 and Elizabeth; but as my Anfwers 
 were necefiarily Defcriptions of what the 
 Readers mull be fufficiently acquainted 
 with, as being intimately known to al- 
 moil every Individual, I fliall come to 
 the lad Point of Inquiry, which was con- 
 cerning the prefent State of Dramatic 
 Writing and our Theatres. 
 
 Here 
 
[ 140] 
 
 Here I confefled that we have not at 
 prelent, nor have had for fonie Years, 
 one Author for the Stage, that, in any 
 Shape, deferves the Name of Poet j the 
 Tragedies are fuch cold, elaborate, un- 
 alarming Pieces of Declamation, that no 
 Adion can give them Life, no Attention 
 purfue them thro' five dull Ads: Indeed 
 they boail of ftridl critical Unities, and 
 fay that the Flowers of Poetry are defign- 
 edly rejeded, as improper for Dialogue; 
 yet, were it not for fuch Pieces as abound 
 in thofe Flowers, and frequently break 
 thro' the Trammels of Criticism, from 
 which the Theatres draw their chief 
 Support, our modern Scribes would not 
 have an Opportunity to crawl thro' nine 
 dull Nights in their Paflage to Oblivion : 
 Nay, I will do them the Juftice to fay, 
 I believe that their flrift Attachment to 
 Criticifm proceeds from its being better 
 fuited to their barren Imaginations, which 
 want Force and Adivity to get beyond 
 
 its 
 
[ 141 ] 
 
 its Infipid Limits. In regard of theif" 
 Comic Pieces, as the Duke of Bucking- 
 ham faid, it was no eafy Matter to pen a 
 Whifper, we find it now a mafberly Point 
 to pen a Blank ; befides, it is made almoft 
 a conflant Rule for one of the Interlocu- 
 tors to begin fpeaking before the other 
 has done, which I always confidered as a 
 Piece of ill Manners. In fhort, there is 
 fuch Snipfnap, fuch Paufes, and Hefita- 
 tion, that if Converfation in private was 
 to take Example from what is exhibited 
 on the Stage, it would be reduced to a 
 moil unmeaning, indelicate Stammering; 
 a Labourino; like the Mountain, to brin^r 
 forth a Moufe. 
 
 What, fays Elizabeth, fuch a Depra- 
 vity in a Country where Shakespear, 
 Dryde'n, Otway, and Congreve have 
 left fuch bright Examples! I am afliam'd 
 of my native Soil, and wifh it had defer- 
 
 ved 
 
[ 142 1 
 
 vcd a better Charader ; but pray, Sir^ 
 have the Theatres declined equally ? 
 
 To this I replied. That, to the bed of 
 my Knowledge, they had never been 
 more encouraged, nor ever were worfe 
 fupported, than at prefent; the Incomes 
 of Performers are immoderate, the Merit 
 very confined. As to the former j why 
 might not One hundred a-year, befides 
 the Advantage of a Benefit, genteelly re- 
 ward any Degree of Merit ? By fuch a Re- 
 gulation, fuch Savings might be made as 
 would enable Managers to take more 
 reafonable Prices for io rational and ef- 
 fential an Entertainment as the Drama 
 affords: In this I would by no Means lef- 
 ien the Confequence or Credit of the 
 Stage, for which no Perfon can have a 
 greater Regard ; but, by bringing it into 
 lefs exceptionable Bounds, to guard it 
 from the Envy and too jufr Complaints 
 which are now levelled againit it. 
 
 In 
 
[ H3 ] 
 
 In regard of Performance ; I have al- 
 ways thought that the general Coiirfe of 
 Nature only can be a fit Standard of Ex- 
 ample j every Chara6ler in private Life will 
 be an unerring Original to copy for the 
 Stage; only as Water-Colour Painting, 
 which is feen ataDiftance,and by artificial 
 Light, requires ftronger Strokes than the 
 Oil-foften"d Tints ; fo Adion upon the 
 Stage fliould enforce and render its Origi- 
 nal more flriking. — But how extremely 
 ■ different is the prefent Pradlice ; inilead of 
 Nature, one eminent Performer, who has 
 certainly aftonifhing Abilities forhisPro- 
 felTion, is iet up to View, and a fervile, 
 unequal Imitation of him glides thro' the 
 various Degrees. In the Play of Richard 
 fcarce a Man but affe6i:s fome Peculiarity 
 of the crooked Monarch •, in Lear the 
 whole Court is flruck with a Kind of com - 
 plaifant Debillity ; or when this fame Idol 
 of Imitation, with mafterly Tranfition, 
 dcfcends into the meaner Scenes of low 
 
 Comedy, 
 
[ H4 ] 
 
 Comedy, his Grimaces, by aKind of elec- 
 trical ConculTion, warp the Features of 
 Charadters widely different j fo that almofl: 
 in every Thing you may fee his Starts, his 
 Paufes, his Adion, his Attitude, ?.nd his 
 Variations of Countenance. — But ah! 
 how changed ! how mifapplied ! I have 
 often thought this paltry ignorant Com- 
 pliment to fuperior Merit, like a whole 
 Town's taking Fancy to the Cloaths of a 
 ConnoiiTeur in Taste; who, without re- 
 garding their own Size, taller or fhorter, 
 bigger or lefs, jfhould make theirs exa6lly 
 of the fame Dimenfions. In fuch a Cafe 
 the Original may be pleafing and pretty, 
 whi'e the Copies muft be utterly ridicu- 
 lous. 
 
 Truly, fays the Namredal, at this 
 Rate your Performances muft lofe much 
 of the Energy that animates juft and ori- 
 ginal Adlion, for no Qualification relative 
 to human Nature can be more contemp- 
 tible 
 
[ 145 ] 
 
 tible or cruel than Mimicry, as it either 
 proceeds from a total Barrennefs of Idea, 
 or an innate Malevolence, which catch- 
 ing at, and aggravating Defe61:s, provides 
 Food for the infatiate Appetite of Ridi- 
 cule. — I am amazed, continues he, that 
 fo much good Senfe, as muft be polTelTed 
 by an Englijb Audience, can digeft fuch 
 grofs Food, or be contented with the 
 Skeletons of Merit. 
 
 Nay, Sir, I replied, if good Senfe was 
 to prevail, the Cafe muft foon take a dif- 
 ferent Turn ; but there is a delufive Mon- 
 fter called Prejudice, which, leading 
 Judgment by the Nofe, decides : Scarce 
 one Auditor thinks for himfelf, but catch- 
 es from his Neighbour, and retales to a 
 third; nor is this confined to Performance, 
 it reaches Authors alfo ; which may, in 
 fome Meafure, account for that Decline 
 of Genius I have mentioned : Scarce any 
 Piece can arrive at aPerufal,unlefs recom- 
 
 K mended 
 
1 146 ] 
 
 -mended by fome Right Honourable 
 ^Perfonage ; who, tho' he can hardly read, 
 is, from his Title, by the Courtefy of 
 'England^ a prbfound Judge of Wit, Senti- 
 ment, and Stile. A Sort of NecefTity to 
 indulge this ufurped Prerogative excul- 
 pates the Managers from the Charge 
 of not regarding Merit. Whenever a 
 Penny is to be got. Nobility and Inte- 
 reft muft put forth their jnonopolizing 
 Claws, and draw it all to the Dens of their 
 hungry Dependents, who are thus laid a 
 Tax upon the Public, and become Ido- 
 laters of thole illuftrious Patrons that 
 purchafe the Immortality of Dedica- 
 tion-Fame, at the Expence of others; 
 they cannot keep thofe more valuable 
 Appendages of.Qiiality, Mistresses 
 andRuNNiNc-HoRSEs, lb cheap. 
 
 At this Rate, cries Elizabeth, I fhall 
 lofe all Patience, and begin to defpife 
 ^ly Country j I got out of it in Time,. 
 
 and 
 
[ 147 3 
 
 nnd am happily come to a Region where 
 impartial Judgment is allowed its juft 
 Influence; no Piece here is valued for 
 the Name of its Author, but only for 
 its intrinfic Merit : Even Shakespear, 
 tho' he has never failed yet, is as critically 
 examined as one who had never wrote be- 
 fore ; indeed there is a precautionary Me- 
 thod which renders this Impartiality un- 
 avoidable ; for every new Dramatic Per- 
 formance is, without any Intimation of the 
 Author's Name, fubmitted to twelve 
 Censors, who confider it, and give the 
 Sandion of their Approbation, or con- 
 demn it as unfit. According to the De- 
 grees of Merit they are performed; and 
 then, when ready for Exhibition, the Au- 
 thor confefles himfelf: Such a Court of 
 Critical Inquiry would enlarge the Field of 
 Genius in Britain. When you return 
 you may propofe it if you chufe ; in the 
 mean Time, if you will accompany the 
 K 2 Nam-s 
 
■-[-148 J 
 
 Nam RE DAL, this Lady and me, to our 
 EsTRALAM, you Will have an Opportu- 
 nity of feeing the Rules and Adion of 
 our NoiBLAN Drama. 
 
 Well, fays the Namredal, fince the 
 Ladies have propoled you fo agreeable 
 an Entertainment, I requeft your Com- 
 pany in the Morning to the Requecex, 
 'tis the Day for adminiftering Juilice, 
 and I dare fay there will be fome Trials 
 worth your hearing : I had fcarce Time 
 to reply when the great Bell tolling in- 
 terrupted our Converfation ; the Ladies, 
 wifhing me a calm Repofe, immediately 
 withdrew^ and the Namredal telling me 
 
 -that was the public Signal for retiring to 
 Reft, conduced me in Perfon to a fmall 
 agreeable Apartment, where Neatnefs 
 fuppiied the Place of Elegance •, there, 
 after the moil kind and hofpitable Ex- 
 
 . prelTions, .he left me to compofe my 
 
 Thoughts 
 
1 149 r 
 
 Thoughts by Slumber, or to giv^e themr 
 full Scope in the wide Field of Reflec- 
 tion upon what has been hitherto re- 
 lated. 
 
 When alone a vafl: Variety of Ideas 
 crowded upon each other in my Imagi- 
 nation ; firll, my unaccountable Convey- 
 ance to the Lunar World, furprizing 
 and inconceivable in its Nature; next, 
 that peculiar and kind Reception I had 
 met in it; the Novelty of thofe Ceremo- 
 nies I had gone thro'; the happy Situa- 
 tion, the tranquil Equality of the People 
 I had, as it were, dropp'd among ; with 
 many other Circumflances which do not 
 now occur : Moreover, I felt fome Degree 
 of Uneafinefs, that I knew not how I was 
 to return, nor when, nor if at all; but 
 Sleep, like a kind Friend, came to my 
 Affiitance, and, by its oblivious Influ- 
 ence clofing up the Eye of Memory, re- 
 lieved me from thofe Anxieties which my 
 ^3 new 
 
[ 150 ] 
 
 new and extraordinary Situation had oc- 
 cafioned. 
 
 CHAP. VIII. 
 
 Account of the Garden Birds ; hreakfafis 
 with /^^ N A M R E D A L ' J Lady j their Re- 
 marks upon Beauty, Love, and Mar- 
 RiAGE; goes to the REquECEXj fome 
 remarkable Trials, 
 
 NOtwithftanding the Hurry of Ima- 
 gination which difturbed me when 
 I retir'd to Bed, I enjoyed all Night the 
 Refrefhment of compoled Sleep : Being 
 waked by the tolling of the Bell, which 
 I underitood to be the general Signal for 
 rifing, I got upi as there was no Windov/ 
 but at the Top of the Room where I lay, 
 and that in Form of a Cupola, I afcend- 
 ed to it, and looking out perceived the 
 Sun to be an Hour high, or thereabouts, 
 beaming upon the mod compadl and 
 beautiful Range of fmall Gardens that I 
 
 ever 
 
r 151 3 
 
 ever faw, wherein an infinite Number of 
 Flowers, Herbs, Shrubs, and Trees were 
 delightfully variegated ; feveral Birds, 
 about the Size of our common Hens, 
 were hovering round •, their Plumage ap- 
 peared charming beyond Defcription ; 
 their Heads were covered with a fhining 
 Down of Golden Hue ; their Wings ex- 
 hibited the brightefl Scarlet; their Necks 
 vied with the Azure of the Firmament, 
 and their Bodies fhamed the pureft Snow; 
 Thefe I afterwards underfbood to be call- 
 ed Dofen Alopu^ Garden Birds^ and tliat 
 they are highly reverenced in Noibla 
 for two Reafons; becaufe, firfl:, they de- 
 fbroy all the Vermin and Infeds that are 
 pernicious to the Fruits of the Earth ; 
 and next, becaufe they are a Kind of na- 
 tural Phyficians; for when any Noielan 
 is indiipofed, as fometimes is the Cafe 
 (lightly, he goes into his Garden, lies 
 down on his Back, v/hen the firil of thefe 
 
 Birdi; 
 
I ^52 ] 
 
 Birds that fees him will light directly up- 
 on his Breaft, put its Bill to his Mouth, 
 give him three or four Flaps with its 
 Wings, then rife and hover round him 
 till he flands up, when it leads him to 
 whatever Herb may be falutary for his 
 Ailment, and this taken never fails to 
 give immediate Relief. 
 
 About half an Hour might have pafTed 
 away in Obfervation before I heard any 
 Body come, when the Namredal's Son 
 approached with fome Water in a Chry- 
 ifal VefTcl ; which prefenting with a fine 
 Cloth, he told me that his Mother at« 
 tended my coming to Breakfaft-, this oc- 
 cafioned me to haften ; and, having wafli- 
 ed, I followed the Lad, who conducted 
 me whither fhe was. 
 
 She received me with mod delicate 
 Affability, and kindly enquired whether 
 
 the 
 
[ 153 I 
 
 the Novelty of my Situation had not in • 
 terfer'd with my Reft : I replied, That 
 tho' an unavoidable Surprize pofTefTed 
 me, yet every Circumftance I faw or 
 heard was fo exceedingly agreeable, that 
 my Nature had never been more plea- 
 fingly or more rationally gratified than 
 fmce my Arrival in Nodnol. This De- 
 claration feemed to give her fenfible Sa- 
 tisfa6i:ion, and fhe propofed Breakfiift 
 in the moft hoipitable Manner-, obfer- 
 ving, at the fame Time, that they had 
 none of the Materials in Noibla which 
 fhe underftood we ufed for Morning 
 Meais in the lower World, yet hoped 
 Novelty would not render them lefs- a- 
 greeable. 
 
 Nay, Madam, faid I, my Tafte is ra- 
 ther plain and unpoliihed, any Thing 
 will do for me ; but, were I one of the 
 niceft Sort, Novelty would be a ftrong 
 Recommendation. Oh, how would Per- 
 
 fons 
 
I 154 ] 
 
 fons of Qiiality and Falliion in England? 
 envy me a Breakfaft in the Moon ? Hovsr 
 would they pay, were there a Communi- 
 cation for Rarities from hence ? Our 
 East-India Trade would ibon decline, 
 as this would be more impradicable and 
 full as ufelefs -, for tho' we have every 
 Thing in ourlfland that Nature can rea- 
 fonably require, but Contents yet are we 
 fo induflrious to cultivate Trouble and 
 Expence, that immenfe Oceans are 
 ploughed, and the moftfuriousTempefls 
 encounter'd, to bring home an Herb, 
 which (beingfaihionable) fomeWretches^ 
 who can hardly purchafe Bread, muil have 
 at any Rate. 
 
 Here, laughing at what fhe juflly call'd 
 fuch artificial NecelTity, fhe poured out a 
 Kind of Azure- colour'd Liquor. She told 
 me it was extraded from the Maltra Enu- 
 the^ oxT^ree of Healthy and that the fmall 
 Cakes eaten with it were made of the 
 
 Bark 
 
[ ^55 ] 
 
 Bark, dried, powdered, and wrought into 
 aConfiftence like our Bifcuits. On Trial I 
 found the Liquid delicious to the Palate, 
 and highly hallamic to theStomach, which 
 would have induced me to drink a good 
 deal more than fell to my Share, for as I 
 found afterwards the Quantity is limited; 
 you take as little as you pleafe, but not 
 as much as Appetite calls for. The Cakes 
 rehfhed but indifferently; however, upon 
 the whole, I could not complain. 
 
 Before Breakfaft I afked for the Nam- 
 REDAL, but was informed that, being to 
 enter upon the Diftribution of Justice, 
 he would not be leen till he was going to 
 the Requecex; that he eat; nothing till 
 the Trials were over, nor ever fuffered 
 himfelf to be difturbed during the Time 
 of preparatory Devotion. It will be near 
 an Hour, Sir, fays his Wife, before he ap- 
 pears ; if a weak Woman's Prattle can 
 make that Space lefs tedious, I will ra- 
 ther 
 
1 156 ] 
 
 tJier expofe my own Deficiencies than 
 futFer you to want Amufement. I re- 
 fpedfully thanked her for fuch unmerit- 
 ed Condefcenfion, wherein Ihe fo much 
 under-rated her own Merits ^ adding, that 
 nothing could be more agreeable than 
 her Converfation, were I not intimidated 
 by a Fear of difcovering a Deficiency on 
 my Side. 
 
 Mighty well, replies fhe, I have often 
 heard that you Men of the Lower 
 World are vailly given to Flattery, 
 which you always beilow moil plentifully 
 upon Females, and fometimes upon one 
 another; but, pray, is it not in both Cafes 
 of a mean and pernicious Nature? It can 
 only ferve to make Vanity flouriih, and 
 predominate over fuch empty Idols as 
 are fond of this Incenfe, while you who 
 offer it, however it may anfwer particular 
 Purpofes, mull naturally have a poor 
 Opinion of that Feeling you labour fo 
 
 in- 
 
[ 157 ] 
 
 induftrioufly to create. We have luckily 
 no fuch Artifice, no luch Parent of Folly 
 among us •, all Approbation is limited to 
 Minds, not Perfons •, to Condu6t, not 
 Beauty; becaule one is the Merit or Fault 
 of Nature, the other merely our own : 
 But pray. Sir, that I may be the better 
 informed of the State of Love in your 
 Country, let me know whether all are 
 obliged to reinforce their PafTion with 
 this intoxicating Ingredient, or is it pof- 
 fible to fucceed without its Aid. 
 
 Madam, fays T, to confefs the honefl 
 Truth, fuch Footing has infinuativei^d- 
 drefs gained among all Sorts of People, 
 that Delufion is much more prevalent 
 than Honefty •, all cry out again ft Flat- 
 tery, yet all take it down with great 
 Plcafure ; but then it muft be varied in 
 its Shape according to the Patient it has 
 to work on-, and tho' the Effe6l of it up- 
 on Women is certainly moft extenfive 
 
 and 
 
[ 158 ] 
 
 and powerful, yet Men of all Denomina- 
 tions are liable to its Influence. 
 
 As to Love, it has been well afHrm'd 
 by rriany eminent Authors, that it is the 
 noblefl Feeling of the human Heart; 
 noble when properly fix'd, and fupport- 
 ed by a delicate Sincerity j dangerous 
 when, at War with Reafon, it captivates 
 all our Intelleds, and leads even our 
 Senfes to their own Delufion. I would 
 endeavour to defcribe the fairell Side, 
 and fhew difrnterefted Affe6lion in its 
 pureil Colours j but 'tis in vain to attempt 
 a Defcription of that which fo rarely ex- 
 ifts amongil us ; to find it in any Rank 
 of People is almoft a Miracle ^ Marriages 
 indeed are negotiated, becaufe Nature 
 and Cuftom prompt the different Sexes 
 to fuch Connexions \ but then they are 
 tranfacled like any other Branch of 
 Trade, and Money appears the chief 
 Match-Maker^ befides, as if we had not 
 
 been 
 
been fufHciently fordid in our Way of 
 thinking, the Legislature took Care 
 to frame a legal Bar againft mutual In- 
 clinations ', a Law which ferves no one 
 End but to enlarge Church Revenues by 
 exorbitant Fees. 
 
 A very extraordinary Piece of Policy 
 indeed, replies fhe ; thank Heaven we 
 have no fuch Legislators here. I 
 thought you told Elizabeth laft Night 
 you had the fame Liberty as in her 
 Time-, now I don't recoiled to have 
 heard my Hufband, who was long after 
 
 . her, mention any fuch Law as you have 
 
 ' juft fpoken of. 
 
 No, Madam, fays I, 'tis of very late 
 Date, and, as it did not affedl me diredly, 
 I had forgot it. And pray, returns flic, 
 how came it ever to be thought of? I re- 
 plied that I never heard nor could ima- 
 gine how fuch an Abortion was concei- 
 ved-, 
 
I i6o ] 
 
 ved; fonre People conje6i:ured it to be 
 the Fruits of a few Great Men's Appre- 
 penfions that their Daughters, to the Dif- 
 grace of Blood, might prefer hale, icn^ 
 fible, vulgar Fellows to emaciated, worn- 
 out Fools of Quality •, fo, in a Rage, they 
 determined to make as many young Peo- 
 ple thro' the Kingdom unhappy as they 
 could; and in numberlefs Inltances I be- 
 lieve it has had the defired Effed:, by oc- 
 cafioningotherwife well-difpofed Couples 
 to take imprudent Steps, rather than en- 
 counter parental Tyranny, (which Ihews 
 itielf too frequently) and the fuperiluous 
 Forms required by Law. 
 
 Here fhe exprefled great Surprize that 
 a Nation, famed for Wifdom and a Love 
 of Freedom, fhould fuller one of the ten- 
 dered Rights of Nature to be infringed, 
 or incumbered with unreafonable partial 
 Reftridions ; then continued to queition 
 me about a Kind of Animals flie had 
 
 heard 
 
C i6i ] 
 
 heard of, call'd Prudes and Coquettes; 
 when I told her we had Plenty of them; 
 the former being a Creature which de- 
 clines all reafonable Freedoms for a for- 
 ced Referve, after fheltering the worft 
 Principles under an aukward Semblance 
 of ilnd: Modelly; the latter, a Kind of 
 wanton Butterfly, which flutters and ex- 
 pands its gaudy Wings as much as pof- 
 fible in the Sunlhine of Fashion ; fond 
 of being admired, and never more happy 
 than when it can make its Admirers mi- 
 ferable. 
 
 And are Men, fays fhe, fuch arrant 
 Dupes as to be impofed upon by mere 
 Semblances ? Or is it the extraordinary 
 Beauty of your Women which gains 
 them fuch an unlimited Influence over 
 Reafon ? 
 
 I told her that it was beyond my Power 
 to account for it; that Beauty was fre- 
 
 L quently 
 
[ 102 J 
 
 quently to be met v/ith, and certainly 
 had much Power -, but that, among the 
 polite World, one fcarce knew what was 
 Beauty, as the Fafhions of Shapes and 
 Features were fo often altered ; fome- 
 times oval Faces are the Standard, then 
 round ones ;. fometimes broad Waifts, 
 fometimes narrow, fo that what is Beau- 
 ty at one Time is. Deformity at another; 
 and Nature, who is not confined within 
 the narrow Bounds of Rule, fuffers fre- 
 quent and undeferved Cenfure from the 
 ignorant Caprice of prevaihng Opinion. 
 
 • Here'flie burft out into a loud Laugh, 
 and repeated the Words fashionable 
 Beauty feveral Times, till the Namre- 
 dal's Appearance termiinated our Con- 
 verfation. — He told me that, if I had a 
 Mind to accept of his Invitation to the 
 Requecex, he w^as jufl: going thither, 
 and would be glad of my Company \ I 
 
 paid 
 
[ 1^3 ] 
 
 paid my Compliments to his Lady, and 
 went with him diredly. 
 
 We were condu6ted by four- and - 
 twenty Citizens, fome of whom carried, 
 as among us, the Infignia of Authority 
 immediately before the Magiilrate ; the 
 chief of which was three Figures in one 
 Piece, mod admirably cut from a brilli- 
 ant Stone or Compofition ♦, the chief Fi- 
 gure was Justice ; on her Right Hand 
 appeared Wisdom fupporting her, and 
 on the Left Me Rcr, (to whom Ihe kindly 
 extends her Hand) kneeling in a fuppli- 
 cative Poflure. The Charadlers were fet 
 forth with much the fame Emblems as. 
 we fee on Earth. 
 
 Having reached the Court, the Nam- 
 REDAL placed me on the Left Hand of 
 his own Seat, which I found to be a 
 Mark of Diftindiion in Noibla. Two 
 Citizens immediately approached, raifed 
 L 2 a 
 
[164] 
 
 a Canopy over the Magidrate, and then 
 clofed him in, except on the Side where 
 I fat, with fomewhat Hke a Silk Curtain ; 
 I wondered what the Meaning of this 
 could be, but was foon relieved from 
 Sulpence; for he told me that, as the 
 Eye was a Parent of Prejudice in almoft 
 every Point of View, and the beft Under- 
 ftanding or foundefc Judgment might be 
 warped by it. the Cuftom of Noibla was 
 to veil the Magidrate from Sight of thofe 
 w^ho came to plead before him, till his 
 Arbitration was determined; it has alfo, 
 fays he, the good Effe6l of keeping At- 
 tention from bein,g; diflurbed bv fur- 
 rounding Obje6ls. 
 
 Juft as he had ended this Obfervation, 
 a Citizen, with much emphatic Delibe- 
 ration, repeated thrice the following 
 
 Words : — Bine da ^ Oh N a m r e d a l, 
 
 'Twanto SelbenTwantaftez.--l^emper^ Oh Fa- 
 ■4her^ y lift ice with the Dew of Mercy, This 
 
 .was 
 
[ 1^5 J 
 
 was the whole Ceremony ufed in open- 
 ing the Court •, which being performed, 
 two Females came up, and one prefer- 
 red her Complaint in the following Man- 
 ner: 
 
 Father of Nodnol, I come before 
 you to feek Reparation for an Injury 
 done me by a Woman here prefentj an 
 Injury of the nicelt Nature, and unpro- 
 voked by me in any Shape, as it has been 
 my conilant Endeavour to live in Har- 
 mony with my Fellow-Citizens ; yet has 
 file, for what Caufe I know not, c^iven 
 out fuch prejudicial Reports, that the 
 warm Cordiality which has fubfifted be- 
 tween my Hufband and me ever fmce 
 we were married, is like to abate much; 
 at lead if it does not, I fhall be more 
 obliged to to Love and Gentlenefs of 
 Difpofition, than to /:'^r Tendernefs in 
 talking j wherefore I humbly befeech Af- 
 L 3 fiftance 
 
[ i66] 
 
 fiftance from your Authority to reftrain 
 her. , 
 
 Is it not aftonifhing, fays theNAMRE- 
 DAL, that where Law is fo very precife 
 and plain, where alfo it is fo generally 
 known, that any can be found hardy 
 enough to tranfgrefs it ? Is there any 
 Property we fland pofTelfed of fo valuable 
 as Charader ? Any Happinefs equal to 
 Peace of Mind, or any Weapons fo dan- 
 gerous as bufy Tongues ? How much 
 Cenfure do they deferve who with Slan- 
 der taint the one, or embitter the other? 
 It is a Cruelty of the mofl affedling 
 Kind, unprofitable, and ignominious ; 
 you then who are charged with fuch un- 
 charitable, fuch'iicentious Behaviour, and 
 to one of your own tender Sex, who are 
 as eafily blafled as Flowers in the Field, 
 fay how can you acquit yourfelf of the ^ 
 Complainant's Accufationj or on what 
 
 Con- 
 
C i«7 T 
 
 Confideration can you plead a Midgatioa 
 of that Punifliment, which, according to 
 Law, falls upon the Guilty ? 
 
 Moft venerable Sir, replies the De- 
 fendant, in whom dwells impartial Ju- 
 llice, to the Charge againft me I plead In- 
 nocence, which I hope to manifefl in few 
 Words i Truth can never be Slancter; 
 our Laws, we all know, point out the 
 Duties of our feveral Stations : This 
 Woman, my Neighbour, who knows and 
 is well able to perform all that can be re- 
 quired of her, by an unufual Influence 
 gained over her pliant Hufband, has for 
 fome Time pafl prevailed on him, toge- 
 ther with his own Charge, to undertake 
 feveral Concerns which properly fall un- 
 der her's •, by which Means gaining more 
 vacant Time than any other Woman can 
 command, flie has made it her Bufinefs to 
 run from Houfe to Houfe, promoting, 
 Idlenefs by unprofitable Converlation,., 
 
 and. 
 
C i68 1 
 
 and making induflrious Women uneafy 
 by fneering at their commendable Appli- 
 cation : Roufed to Refentment by fuch 
 Behaviour, I own I have faid that her 
 Hufband Ihows himfelf weak to be fo la- 
 vifh of Indulgence, and that fhe proves 
 herfelf highly unworthy of it by fuch 
 Mifapplication. This is the Extent of 
 my Crime, if fuch it be, and to your Cle- 
 mency I fubmit. 
 
 This Cafe, fays the Namredal, con- 
 fidered both from the Accufation and 
 Defence, pronounces each Party equally 
 guilty, you the Accuser, for fhameful- 
 ly withdrawing from the Duties of a good 
 Wife under the Shelter of a Hufband's 
 Fondnefs ; and you, the Accused, for 
 being fo very forward to publilh your 
 Judgment upon an Affair which in no 
 Shape came under your Cognizance. By 
 what Authority are you the Inspector 
 of your Neighbours ? You fhould be the^ 
 
 Friends, 
 
[ 1% ] 
 
 Friends, the Advifers, and not the Ccn- 
 fors of each other; rather ftudious ta 
 conceal than forward to expofe Failings 
 of this Nature ; but, fince you are come 
 here fraught with the Spirit of Conten- 
 tion, hear your feveral Sentences. 
 
 You who have been fo ready to alarm 
 Juftice by the Clamours of Complaint, 
 knowing yourfelf to be guilty of at lead 
 as great a Crime, fliall for three Toir- 
 TAS lofe your Seat in the Ruvenal, and 
 attend your Flufband there publickly as 
 a Servitor during that Time, having the 
 Words Retbo eltibem ElhaU — An artful 
 IVifc^ — labelled on your Breaft in large 
 Letters ; and you, who have been fo alert 
 to proclaim a Neighbour's Failings, fhall 
 be enjoined ftrid Silence for the fame 
 Space, being ftigmatized with the Words 
 
 Retho fiintat Elhal^ — A tailing TFife. ■ 
 
 Hence therefore, and from the Shame 
 you have both incurred, learn that focial 
 
 Ao^ree- 
 
[ I70 ] 
 
 Agreement is preferable to Contention'; 
 that to corred our own Failings, to mind 
 our own Bufinefs, and not to interfere 
 with other People's Concerns, is the fureft 
 Road to Quiet and Profperity. 
 
 The Females being removed there ap- 
 peared two Brothers, named Effilar 
 and AiTROTA j the former addrelTing 
 himfelf, faid — Awful Sir, we are Bro- 
 thers and Twins, not more intimately; 
 united by our Births than our Inclina- 
 tions-, yet as the Death of our Mother, as 
 foon almoft as we were born, has left tho 
 Elderfhip doubtful, and as, without fix- 
 ing this, we cannot make any legal Set- 
 tlement of our Affairs, we humbly pre- 
 fent ourfelves before your Wifdom, and 
 fupplicate Advice how we may furmount 
 the Difficulty; which is Hill rendered 
 more difagreeable as we both love the 
 fame Female, but cannot prevail with 
 
 her 
 
[ '71 ] 
 
 her to declare in Favour of either till the 
 Point in Debate is fettled. 
 
 Before I proceed to determine, fays 
 the Namredal, inform me, with the 
 mod undifguifed Truth, whether you 
 feek my Judgment from any View of 
 Precedence arifing from Elderfliip, and 
 whether to decide in Favour of one will 
 create any Uneafinefs in the other ? Or 
 whether, united by the tender and natu- 
 ral Tie of brotherly Love, you feek it 
 fnnply from the Motives you have men- 
 tioned ? — They replied, folely from the 
 Motives they had mentioned. 
 
 Well then, continus he, you fhall have 
 my Opinion •, but fome Space of Confi- 
 deration will be requifite in fo new a 
 Cafe. In the mean Time, I muft let you 
 know that there is a poor Man, who, by 
 Accident, is rendered incapable of con- 
 tributing his Share to the common Stock, 
 
 where- 
 
[ 172 ] 
 
 "wHerefore he is in Danger of being re- 
 moved from his Seat in the Ruvenal, 
 the thought of which wounds him deep- 
 ly-, he has foliicited Help from feveral, 
 but found none ^ if you, or either of you, 
 can fpare Time to afTift him, it will be an 
 A6t of great Benevolence. 
 
 TothisEpFiLAR replied, Venerable 
 Father, I could wifh that I had the 
 Pov/er of afiiiling him, but my Hours arc 
 fo limited and fo fully employed, that the 
 kind Willies of Pity are all I can afford 
 him. 
 
 i\las, replies AiTROTAj when Afflidion 
 wounds. Willies are but a poor and pain- 
 ful Palliative, my Hours are limited and 
 engaged alfo ^ yet, if to fpare one Flalf of 
 what is allotted for my particular Ufe 
 can relieve him, I will moll gladly, Oh 
 Father, let him have it. 
 
 Aye, 
 
[ 173 ] 
 
 Aye, fays the Namredal, then you 
 have fully convinced me who is the elder-, 
 'tis not a few Hours or a few Years that 
 fhould place one Man before another; he 
 who excells in Humanity^, Benevolence, 
 and fecial Duties, deferves the moft wor- 
 thy Precedence •> That, AiTROTA, do thou 
 enjoy, and exert thyfelf in Pity to thy Bro- 
 ther ; to enlarge his Heart, to foften his 
 Feelings, and to create in him an Emula- 
 tion of thy Goodnefs. — Here the Twins 
 embraced, and he whom the Namredal 
 had fet afide, fecmed as well pleafed as if 
 theDecifion had been on his Part-, only a 
 confciousBlufh glow'd on his Cheek at the 
 juft and gentle Rebuke of the Magiilrate. 
 
 As they were on the Point of depart- 
 ing, the Namredal faid, Hold, I re- 
 member you told me that one Female 
 had engaged the Affedion of both, but 
 that the Doubt of Elderfnip prevented 
 her from accepting either : This appears 
 
 to 
 
1 174 ] 
 
 to me a Proof that fhe is unworthy, and 
 that fne feeks to gratify Pride more than 
 Love ; therefore let me advife you to 
 bring her before me, and I'll negotiate, 
 if poffible, to your mutual Satisfa6lion j 
 but take Heed not to mention the Deter- 
 mination I have made. This Propofal 
 was joyfully accepted, and E f f i l a r 
 went immediately to bring the Damfel ; 
 with whom in a few Moments lie return'd, 
 when the Namredal fpoke thus to her : 
 
 Virtuous Maid, here are two Brothers,, 
 both, I underitand. Suitors of yours; 
 they have agreed, before me, to abide by 
 your free and unbiafTed Choice; fay then, 
 whether you will become the Wife of 
 Effilar, now in Court confirmed the 
 Elder, or throw yourfelf into the Arms 
 of AiTROTA, the Younger? (in faying of 
 which he reverfed them) the Girl, with- 
 out any Hefitation, fixed upon Effilar; 
 when the Magiftrate, having made her 
 
 repeat 
 
Yepcat the Choice three or four Times, 
 and declare that Love only fwayed her, 
 he informed her of the Deceit, and that 
 in Reality flie had chofen the youngeft \ 
 upon which her Colour went thro' a Va- 
 riety of Changes, and flie appeared in the 
 moil painful Confufion J which theNAM- 
 REDAL perceiving, for now the Curtain 
 was drawn from before him, he cried our, 
 with unufual Severity, — Thou Shame to 
 the NoiBLAN Race; thou poor unhappy 
 Slave of Pride, unworthy and ignorant of 
 that pure ethereal Flame which difinte- 
 refbed Love beams into the Heart ; how 
 couldll thou be fo bhnd to thy own Hap- 
 pinefs, and cruel to that of another, as to 
 have thy choice direded by fo falfe a Me- 
 teor as Vanity ? Fly, begone, worthlefs as 
 thou art, from the Comforts andPleafures 
 of Society, that thou may'ft not again 
 have the Opportunity to impofe a worth- 
 lefs Heart, through Recommendation ot 
 a lovely Form \ I banifli thee for live 
 
 Ra- 
 
[ 176 ] 
 
 Rayamons to Omyrchal, at the End of 
 which Time thou may'H return, but ne- 
 ver to enter the honourable State of Mar- 
 riage ; bring forth, fays he, the Garment 
 and Veil of Mourning, in which that ad- 
 ventitious Merit, on which fhe prides 
 herfeif fo much, may be immediately ob- 
 Ibured. 
 
 At this dreadful Sentence the felf-be- 
 .tray'd Female fainted away; the Brothers 
 could not avoid afTiiling her, nor even 
 Hiedding Tears ; yet, in fuch Cafes, Sen- 
 tence once pafied is irrevocable, and how- 
 ever they might lament her Fate, ail al- 
 lowed it to be jull. 
 
 Mercy deliver us, thought I, what a 
 deal of Banilhment we fliould have in 
 England if fuch a Law was to take 
 Place ; whole Swarms of the pretty, 
 fprightly, fluttering Animals called Co- 
 <^JETTES would be fwept away, to the 
 
 no. 
 
[ ^n ] 
 
 no fmall Diminution and Prejudice of 
 the Beau Monde : Harmleis Beaus v/ould 
 then be deprived of Subje6ls for FAo- 
 quence •, Winks, Nods, Leers, Becks, 
 Smiles, and Ogles, the powerful Artillery 
 of artificial Love, would be rendered 
 ufelefs, and the whole CEconomy of In- 
 trigue totally annihilated. 
 
 This Reverie would, in all Probabi- 
 lity, have extended itfelf to a confidera- 
 ble Length, but that I was roufed by a 
 confufed Noife arifing from the Approach 
 of two Diiputants, one of whom I recol- 
 leded to be my old Friend Beau Nash.; 
 the other, in Appearance, I knew nothing 
 of. The Beau, who flili retained his 
 Badge of Office, the white Beaver, fpoke 
 to the Namredal, as we Ihall find in the 
 next Chapter. 
 
 M CHAP. 
 
' [ I7S ] 
 
 CHAP. IX. 
 
 Continuation of trials in the K'eqv^cex. 
 
 MAY it pleafe you, Sir, I was efteem- 
 ed upon Earth a very confiderable 
 Perfonage -, 'tis true I am in the Moon 
 at prefent; but no Matter for that, I was 
 Master of the Ceremonies at a Place 
 called Bath : Indeed they ufed to ftile 
 me King of it; and, tho' I am no Citi- 
 zen here, I ruled all the Citizens there; 
 nay, fcolded Ladies, cut Jokes upon 
 Lords, direded Balls, befpoke Plays, and 
 did — in fhort I did what I pleafed : The 
 Corporation idolized, the Long-Rooms 
 reverenced, the Coffee-Houfes adored 
 me: I had my Statue fet up in the 
 PuMP-RooM, not a good Likenefs; but 
 no Matter for that, — I was always a 
 great Enemy to Qiiarrels, and therefore 
 never fuffer'd a Sword to be drav/n in my 
 Territories ; fo not knowing there would 
 
 be 
 
[ ^19 ] 
 
 be any Occafion for fuch Implements in 
 another World, I came hither quite un- 
 provided; which this grim old Roman 
 being acquainted with, took the Advan- 
 tage of fuperior Strength, and Yefterd.i} 
 pulled me by the Nofe all round the 
 Salmina Ruvenal, fpurring mc on 
 every fix or eight Yards with a fevcrc 
 Kick, which I think very Ungentleman- 
 like Treatment, and I hope you will think 
 fo too, that he may be correded for it. 
 
 The familiar Nothingnefs of this Speech 
 occafioned a general Smile thro' the Au- 
 dience, and I obferved that even the 
 Namredal had fome Difficulty to coni- 
 mand his Mufcles-, however, Reafon and 
 the Dignity of his Office checking other 
 Feelings, he took Occafion to remark, 
 that neither of the Parties being natura- 
 lized, nor any Law provided in Noibla 
 againfl fuch violent Proceedings, the Ju- 
 ftice to be adapted in this Cafe muft lie en- 
 M 2 tirely 
 
[ i8o ] 
 
 tirely upon his Judgment, which he v/ould 
 admlniiler with ail poUible Impartiality : 
 For this Purpofe he defired the Defend- 
 ant to offer his Negative, or Palliation, 
 
 The Accufed, who was no lefs than the 
 great Cato, delivered himfelf to the fol- 
 lowing EfFe6l : Sage Son of Justice 
 AND Law, to be Competitor or Difpu- 
 tant with fuch a Thing as now ftands be- 
 fore me, is Punilliment equal to the high- 
 eil Crime-, yet unworthy, and far beneath 
 my Notice as he is, I fhall enter into an 
 Account of my Condu6l, which has dif- 
 eovered no Fault but that of too much 
 Mildnefs. 
 
 This felf-blown Bubble has, in tracing 
 himfelf, fufficiently fhewn his Emptinefs 
 and Infignificance -, norwill it avail much 
 to fet the paltry Portrait in more glaring 
 Colours than that he fpent a Life of Four- 
 fcore Years in a motley Mixture of Vice, 
 
 Idle- 
 
[ ISI ] 
 
 Idlenefs, Foppery, and ridiculous Autho- 
 rity •, the Jell of fenfible Men, the Com- 
 panion of Sharpers, and Terror of dan- 
 cing Girls; laughed at in Youth, andde- 
 fpifed in Age. 
 
 How different from this the Race I 
 run ? My early Years employed in the 
 Cultivation of my Mind •, thofe of ripen'd 
 Manhood worn, as I may fay, in {lem- 
 ming the Torrent of Fa6lion •, — there 
 view a flcipping Child of Folly — here be- 
 hold a difmterelled Son of Liberty; — 
 and fhall — Oh Heavens — this Infe£l, not 
 two Degrees above mere Inflindl, becaufe 
 v/e are met in a Region where juil Di- 
 flindlions ceafe, dare to mate himfelf with 
 Cato unchaftifed ? No, let it not be faid. 
 Roufed by his biting Taunts, 1 own I did 
 treat him in the Manner he has fet forth; 
 nor can I think unjullly ; yet if Fortune, 
 which has purfued me even hither with 
 her Frov/ns, continues to torment me, I 
 M 3 cannot 
 
[ I82 ] 
 
 cannot avoid her Malice, and therefore 
 muft endure it. 
 
 This Reply being concluded, in which 
 may be difcovered as much of Stoical 
 Pride as the other fhewed of Foppifh 
 Self-fufficiency, theNAMREDAL difcufled 
 their Cafe in the following Manner : 
 
 It is amazing that, in this Region of 
 TranquiUity, neither Example nor the 
 Fear of Difgrace, which is the moft 
 poignant Sting of all Punifhment, can re- 
 duce Sublunars from that turbulent Spirit 
 fo prevalent amongft them.— You, Nash, 
 continues he, who boafl of having been 
 fo many Years Condu6lor of public Man- 
 ners, ought to know better than to break 
 untimely Jefts upon a Man fo much more 
 eminent than you ever could pretend to 
 be -, notwithflanding thofe who think 
 themfelves Wits on Earth may indulge a 
 fuppofed Privilege of calling their Darts 
 
 in- 
 
[ ^H ] 
 
 indifcdmihately round, we never can fuf- 
 fer it here, unlefs in Form of legal Pu- 
 nilliment, fmce it is repugnant both to 
 Realbn and Humanity; I fhall therefore 
 enjoin you to obferve an abfolute Silence 
 for one Rayamon, never hereafter, on 
 any Pretence, to utter a Falfity, and to 
 be clothed all the while of your Silence 
 in a coarfe Garrfient, the dired Contraft 
 to that you feem fo fond of. — Here the 
 Beau groaned deeply, and begg'd for his • 
 white Hat, but even that was denied 
 him, which feemed to have ftill a more 
 fenfible Effed*, while Cato confefTed a 
 Kind of cynical Joy at fo ridiculous aDi- 
 itrefs ; but, as the Enjoyments of ill Na- 
 ture ever fhould be, it was of very fhort 
 Continuance ; for when he thought him- 
 felf juftified in his Antagonift's Sentence, 
 the Namredal opened his Eyes, and 
 mortified his Pride thus ; 
 
 Think 
 
[ i84 ] 
 
 Think not, Cato, that the Convidion 
 of him exculpates you •, though you did 
 receive fome flight Offence, yet I know- 
 not any rational Syllem that unites the fe- 
 veral Charadlers of Complainant, Judge, 
 and Executioner: Befides, there is in your 
 Defence fomewhat as blameable as in 
 the former Part of your Condu6l. Your 
 Accufer fets forth his own Charadler juft- 
 ly, without throwing any Sarcafms upon 
 yours •, he betrayed Pride, but then it is 
 of the inoffenfive Kind. On the con- 
 trary, you have endeavoured to mount 
 yourfelf on his poor Ruins ; you have 
 carefully diminiflied him, and oflienta- 
 tiouily magnified yourfelf ^ tho' a Man of 
 yourRefledion muft know that the great- 
 eft Merit vaniflies before Self-praife, like 
 Chaff before the Wind : Befides, you have 
 envioufly fupprcffcd one moft amiable 
 Part of his Chara6ler, an induftrious, un- 
 limited Difpofition to Charity, which muft 
 have reached your Ears as well as other 
 
 Points 
 
[ '85 ] 
 
 Points relating to him. — You boad of 
 Philofophy ; how comes it that, fo armed, 
 you could not rcflrain yourfeif from 
 Blows, and fuffer his Infignilicancc to pafs 
 unheeded ? But the Paflion of uno-overn- 
 able Pride which intoxicated you on 
 Earth, ftill vifibly prevails, tho' you have 
 fo often felt its bad Efie6ls ; in this Cafe 
 I cannot avoid paiTing upon you the fol- 
 lowing Sentence : That, after Naspi has 
 performed his Pennance, you fhall be 
 obliged to keep him Company for two 
 Rayamons ; when, by my Authrity, he 
 may talk as much, as loud, as fail, and 
 vent as keen a Ridicule as he pleafes, 
 being at Liberty once each Toirta to 
 claim the AfTiftance of his Afibciates 
 CiBBER and Rich. 
 
 Thefe Names made the Stoic fliudder; 
 but knowing the Matter was unavoid- 
 able, he colledled what Refolution he 
 coukl to carry off Appearances, and floun- 
 ced 
 
[ 186 ] 
 
 eed out of Court with a LoqIc of inef- 
 fable Contempt, while C^sisar and Pom- 
 PEY, who had been iiltening from a Cor- 
 ner to the whole Tranfa6tion, indulged 
 their Mirth very freely on this Occafion. 
 
 The next Complaint was a Charge of 
 Ingratitude preferred by one Man againft 
 another, in which the Plaintiff fet forth, 
 That he had, upon feveral Occafions, af- 
 fifled the Defendant j that he had been 
 indullrious to oblige him, notwit-hfland- 
 ing which, continues he, forgetting the 
 Feelings every honeft Man Ihould have 
 for Favours received, he has taken the 
 firft Opportunity of (hewing himfelf my 
 Enemy. 
 
 What, fays the Namredal, is it pof- 
 fible? Can there in Noibla be fuch a 
 Wretch? Ingratitude, the very Men- 
 tion of a Temper fo difgraceful to the 
 reafonable Nature, provokes our Indig- 
 nation. 
 
[ iS; ] 
 
 nation. Shall Beads of the Field cad off 
 their Wildnefs, and enter into a grateful 
 kind Intimacy with their Keeper ? Shall 
 the winged Inhabitants of Air come 
 tamely to the Hand that feeds them ; and 
 fhall Man fleel his Heart againft all Im- 
 preflions of Kindnefs, and all Sentiments 
 of Gratitude ? Oh Shame! Shame! 
 Shame I Say thou who art complained 
 againft, how thou canft wipe off fo deep 
 a Stain -, a Stain which, were it poffible 
 thou couldft have a rhoufand other Vir- 
 tues, would fully and depreciate them all. 
 
 Sage and merciful Administrator 
 of Justice, fays the Defendant, to de- 
 fcribe the Anxiety I feel in being even 
 fuppofed capable of fuch a Crime, re- 
 quires more forcible Expreffion than I 
 am poiTeffed of; it pains me too that, in 
 my Defence, I muft caft fome Cenfure 
 upon a Man who, I acknowledge, has 
 often done me Service j but his own pre- 
 cipitate 
 
[ i88 ] 
 
 eipitate Temper forces the dlfagreeable 
 Taflv upon me, and Self-defence requires 
 me to perform it ♦, which, however, I 
 fhall do in as gentle and concife a Man- 
 ner as pofTible. 
 
 I have confefTed myfelf indebted for 
 Favours received j but how far the Obli- 
 gation was diminifhed by myBenefador's 
 public boafting of his Kindnefs to me, at 
 feveral different Times and Places, I fub- 
 mit, Oh Namredal, to your impartial 
 Determination : Notwithftanding this, 
 my Feelings were not lefTen'd, nor would 
 I have negledled any proper Teftimonies 
 of Thankfulnefs. This Complaint of his 
 strifes from my having reported fome Mif- 
 condud I obferved in his Family while I 
 adted as one of the Elbiros, weekly In- 
 fpedors-, a NecefTity irkfome in itfelf, 
 yet at that Time unavoidable by me. 
 
 Mod 
 
[ i89 ] 
 
 Moft certainly, replies the Namre DAL; 
 are Ads of Friendlhip to take the Place 
 of Bribes ? Mud Truth and Juftice be 
 facrificed to them ? Shall the delegated 
 Trufl of public Ox-Rces be betray'd to pri- 
 vate Partialities ? Bcfides, continues he, 
 applying to the Plaintiff, thy mean Pro- 
 clamation of thy Bounty not only dimi- 
 niilies, but even annihilates all Obliga- 
 tion ; hadll thou exerted it merely to 
 ferve thy Friend, the filent delicate Plea- 
 fure of doing it would have fufficed thee; 
 but Oflentation was the Principle, and 
 being dellitute of Virtue, it is fit thou 
 fhou'dft be dellitute of Reward for thefe 
 Reafons ; and more particularly for im- 
 peaching the Character of thy Fellow- 
 Citizen, I confider thee as a Criminal, 
 and 111 all fentence thee to a6t as his Ser- 
 vant three Reapans, and once each 
 ToiRTA to make a public Acknowledg^e- 
 ment of thy Guilt in the Ruvenal, fol- 
 liciting his Forgivenefs. 
 
 Here 
 
[ ipo ] 
 
 Here the Defendant earneflly implo- 
 red a RemitTion of the Sentence, remark- 
 ing that it would be as painful to him as 
 to the condemn'd Perfon •, and that he 
 v/as certain this public Repulfe would 
 corre6t that Impatience of Difpofition 
 
 which led him i^ito Error.- Well, fays 
 
 the Namredal, I yield to thy humane 
 and generous Sollicitation, w^hich, for ma- 
 licious Profecution, returns the gentle 
 Balm of Mercy : Depart full of that Sa- 
 tisfa(5lion a generous Heart mufl feel 
 from alleviating or averting Didrefs j and 
 thou, unworthy Objed: of this Goodnefs, 
 endeavour, by a zealous Reformation, to 
 deferve fo valuables Friend. 
 
 The next Subjedl of Judicial Confide- 
 ration, which came before the Namre- 
 dal, was an Accufation againft a young 
 Man for uttering fome ExprefTions in- 
 confiilent with Modefly before a Com- 
 pany of Females : As he acknowledged 
 
 the 
 
[ 191 ] 
 
 the Circumflances at large, and refled 
 his Caufe on the Clemency of the Court, 
 nothing more pafTed but the following 
 Remarks made, and Sentence pafied by 
 the Magiftrate. 
 
 Haft thou not been taught — Oh in- 
 confiderate Youth — that Modesty 
 /hould be held ever facred ? That it is the 
 Shield of Virtue, and, if once penetrated 
 by the Stings of Vice, fcarce admits Re- 
 pair ? Like Snow it difcovers the fmalleft 
 Speck that chances to light upon it, and as 
 that watry Confiftence melts away before 
 the Sun, fo Modesty vanifhes before 
 the Heat of inordinate Paffions, or even 
 
 Words expreffive of thofe PalTions . 
 
 Wouldft thou preferve Purity in Feed- 
 ing, and yet defile thy Mouth with im- 
 pure Language ? Haft thou no more Re^ 
 gard for Society than to vent fuch perni- 
 cious Poifon ? Will it plcafe thee to 
 breathe Infeftion that may blaft the Rofes 
 
 of 
 
[ ^r- ] 
 
 of Beauty? Art thou endov/cd wlthRea- 
 fon to make it an Inftrument of Good or 
 Evil? If of Good, how canfl thou employ 
 it to wound the tender and dehcate Ear 
 of Virtue ? If of Evil, like thofe veno- 
 mous and naufeous Animals, which are 
 equally dangerous and loathfome, thou 
 fiiouldil be iliunn'd and excluded from 
 Society. 
 
 Thus much I have fpoke, if Shame be 
 not dead in thee, to roufe it. What re- 
 mains for me is to pafs the Sentence cfta- 
 blifhed by Law for fuch Offences ; which 
 is, that barefooted, with thy Head un- 
 covered, and the Words, Relbo efcl na it- 
 fedom^ — J Foe to Modcjly^ — on thy Breafl; 
 thou art to be publickly led thro' Nod- 
 NOL fix Days fucceffively, and afterwards 
 in the fame Manner thro' every Are sal 
 in the whole Ifland of Noibla ; during 
 which Space thou art disfranchifed from 
 all thy Rights and Privileges as a Citizen. 
 
 After 
 
i 193 ] 
 
 After this a grave Man and a young 
 Female made their Appearance, and the 
 Man rpoke to this EfFedt: 1 am. Vene- 
 rable Namred AL, Father of this young 
 Woman now brought before you, and in 
 that Relation have always exerted my 
 tenderell Care, as well from natural Af- 
 fection as from the Principle of parental 
 Duty; I have not only ftudioufly culti- 
 vated her Mind, which I have found 
 moil apt and teachable, but I have alfo, 
 upon all Occafions, allowed her every 
 prudent Indulgence -, like a delicate and 
 beauteous Flower fhe has flourilhed un- 
 der my Care, yet it grieves me to add 
 that, for fome Time pad, flie has con- 
 duced herfelf in a Manner very contra- 
 didtory to my Opinion, which I take to 
 arife from an Intimacy fhe has contradled 
 with a Female lately arrived from the 
 nether World. By our Inftitutions all 
 Women are drefTed in the fame Kind of 
 
 N . Ma- 
 
[ 194 ] 
 
 "Materials, therefore fhe cannot have'Va- 
 riety of Garments, yet has ihe an iniiniEe 
 Number of what ihe calls Fashions; 
 fometimes long Sleeves, fometimes ihort; 
 fometimes Wings as if fhe was gomg to 
 fiy^ then bare as an unfeather'd Pinion ; 
 fometimes a Tail fweeping the Ground, 
 then fo much curtail'd that half her Legs 
 may be feen ; befides which, tho' I have 
 ■often pointed out. agreeable Partners for 
 Marriage, Ihe puts me off with faying 
 flie cannot give up her Liberty yet; that 
 fuch a one is not handfome enough; that 
 another is not witty ; a third has no Spi- 
 rits, -and many other fuch-like trifling 
 Lvafions ; notwithftanding which fhe is 
 never eafy but when flaunting with Men : 
 This I have often reironftrated againfl, 
 -but to no Purpofe ; and of late fhe has 
 had the Confidence to tell me that Men 
 in Years were no Judges of what was fit 
 for young Women , wherefore. Oh Fa- 
 ther 
 
C ^95 ] 
 
 THER of NoDNOL, I havc broiiglit her 
 hither for your V/ifdom and Authority 
 to influence. 
 
 Aye, replies theNAMREDAL, have we 
 Difobedience and a Contempt of parental 
 Power creeping in amongft us ? If fo, 
 adieu to Order, Peace, Virtue, and fo- 
 cial Happinefs. — Pray, young Madam, 
 how have you ventured to depart fo far 
 from the Obligations of Nature and the 
 flridl Laws of this Ifland ? If you have 
 any Apology, any Plea, make it, and I 
 fhall attend. 
 
 The poor Girl, covered with extreme 
 Confufion, had fcarce Power to utter the 
 following broken Sentences ; that fhe lo- 
 ved her Father very well, and had a great 
 Pleafure in obeying him, but that the 
 
 Countess of , (her Title is omitted 
 
 in Refpedl of fome living) lately arrived 
 
 frojn England, told her, Fathers were 
 
 N 2 fuch 
 
[196 ] 
 
 fuch chuff Fellows, who would not wil- 
 lingly allow their Children any Pleafures; 
 that no Girl of Spirit fliould mind them; 
 that if fhe married it would cut of all Ad- 
 mirers ; that by keeping Company with 
 different Men. fhe would have a better 
 Choice ; and that making Cloaths in va- 
 rious Fashions would fet her off to more 
 Advantage. 
 
 A very hopeful Account, truly, fays 
 the Magiflrate, and for all this fenfible, 
 kind Inflru6lion you are indebted to the 
 Countess. Upon my Word it would 
 be great Pity, and rcfledt upon us much 
 Difgrace, if fo public-fpirited a Lady, 
 who would reform our Manners, teach 
 us Elegance for Simplicity, and Spirit 
 for Prudence, fhould go unrewarded-, 
 wherefore. Oh ye Citizens, you who this 
 . Day give Force to Law, take Notice that 
 I fentence the faid Countess, without 
 Hope of Redemption, to the Valley of 
 
 ' Weip- 
 
E 197 ] 
 Weeping-, there let her expatiate ort 
 Tafte •, there let her difplay falliionable 
 Knowledge ; there fet up the vain Idols 
 of her frantic Brain. 
 
 As for you, young Daughter, conti- 
 nued the Namredal, v ha^lave been led 
 aftray thro' Inexperience, I fhall endea- 
 vour to inform you better, by remarkmg 
 upon each Particular of what you have 
 iliid; this the Duty of the Magifterial 
 Office requires, and my Duty is enforced 
 by thofe tender and fympathetic Feelings 
 which urge us to guard or refcue natural 
 Innocence from artificial Guilt, 
 
 Firil, then, as to the Love of your Fa- 
 ther; I grant it may be affedionate, but 
 it cannot be truly filial or perfe6l without 
 an unlimited Obedience to his Authority, 
 and an implicit Compliance with his Pre- 
 cepts •, which, you may be fatisfied, are 
 both exerted to promote your Welfare 
 N 2 and 
 
[ 198 ] 
 
 and Happinefs. I know that be and you 
 view Things in a very different Light, as 
 Age and Youth ever do; the Vivacity of 
 the latter, like an impadent Courfer, 
 fbruggles for the full and dangerous 
 Stretch of natural Liberty, while the for- 
 mer is making Ufe of the prudential 
 
 Check-Rein of Rellraint. Confider, 
 
 Age fees Adions and Circumftances in 
 their true Shape, and difcerns what Con- 
 fequences they lead on to ^ while Youth, 
 looking through Paffion-tainted Optics, 
 views them colour'd according to their 
 Fancy and their Wifh ; hence therefore 
 the Opinions and Advice of experienced 
 Elders, of Parents efpecially, fhould be 
 allowed all due Influence. 
 
 Your Choice in Marriage is, by the 
 Laws of the Illand, undoubtedly free, 
 and Reafon fandtifies thofe Laws, there- 
 fore in this Point you have no Compul- 
 fion to fear; but Freedom is not in- 
 fringed 
 
[ ^99 ] 
 
 fringed by the cordial Advice of thofe 
 who have your Prolperiiy at Heart. As 
 to the idle Notion of lofing Liberty and 
 .Admirers by taking a Huiband, nothing 
 can be more abfurd -, true Liberty does 
 not confift in a licentious Lndulgence of 
 Follies and Proftitution of Time, but in 
 an uncontrouled, voluntary, prudent Pur- 
 fuit of Virtue and domeftic Happinefs, 
 to which the very Name of Admirers is 
 a Bane, I mean Admirers of external 
 Charms only-, for of thofe who admire the. 
 unfading, Beauties of the Mind, who can 
 gain more than Ihe who diilinguiflies her- 
 felf by the eminent and moft amiable 
 Tide of yf good IVife? She has number- 
 lefs Opportunities of commanding Praife,. 
 which the fingle State affords not-, in that 
 Chara(5ter are comprized fuch invincible 
 Charms as brave the Attacks of Sorrow, 
 Pain, Sicknefs, and even Death itfeif, the 
 Matrimonial Union colledls into aTrain- 
 of uniform, folid, and Lifting Enjoyment, 
 
 that 
 
[ 200 ] 
 
 that Happinefs which in Celibacy is dif- 
 fufed variable and imperfe6l. 
 
 By aflbciating with a Variety of Gal- 
 lants you think Power and Choice en- 
 larged; it may be fo, but then it becomes 
 dangerous, fince nothing can be more 
 prejudicial to the Character of a young 
 Woman, nothing more repugnant to 
 Prudence; and tho' it be not an abfolute 
 Violation of Virtue, yet is it a great Ble- 
 mifii in her Reputation, for even Appear- 
 ances of what is wrong fhould be avoid- 
 ed; in the Eye of Reafon the Proftitution- 
 of the Mind, which certainly leads to it, 
 is little lefs offenfive than the ProRitution 
 of the Perfon. 
 
 As to the Variation of Fafhion, whidh 
 is in itfelf childiih, It may pofTibly add 
 fomev/hat to Attraction of Features; nor 
 Vv'ould there be any great Matter of Of- 
 fence in it, but for the Time it muil: ne- 
 
 celTarily 
 
[ 201 ] 
 
 eeflarily engrofs, and the unprofitable 
 Emulation it muft create of outvying 
 each other in Trifles, when all our Con- 
 tefl fhould be. to gain an honourable Di- 
 ftin(5lion in the Race of public and pri- 
 vate Virtues. — DrefTing to draw Admirers 
 is one of the poorefl Baits of Folly, Neat- 
 nefs is agreeable to Realbn and Nature, 
 and equally eflential to Maid and Wife; 
 more is at bell but idle Superfluity. 
 
 Lock up thefe Remarks, fair Daugh- 
 ter, in your Heart; think not that, being 
 grave, they are fevere ; entertain a grate- 
 ful Remembrance of your Father's kind 
 Attention to your Welfare; give Heed to 
 his Advice, Obedience to his Commands, 
 and on fuch Conditions T will not only- 
 free you from Punifliment, but even from 
 Cenfurc. 
 
 Having thus (Concluded, the Father re- 
 verently made Obeifance to him, and the 
 
 Girl 
 
[ 202 ] 
 
 Girl returned filent Thanks in Tears of 
 penitent Joy. So terminated the Bufi- 
 nefs of the Day ; when the Nam red al, 
 defcending from his Judgment-Seat, con- 
 ducted me, thro' the attending Citizens, 
 to theDining-Hali; when feated, he afk- 
 ed me how I liked their Court of Judica- 
 ture, which occafioned me to break out 
 into a rapturous Exclamation : Happy ! 
 fupre.mely happy N o i b l a n s ! among 
 whom Juftice appears in her own un- 
 adorned, modeft, native Dignity, not ar- 
 ray'd in the Fool's Coat of Tricks and 
 Equivocation : Where the Magiftrate is 
 indeed a Parent of the People j where un- 
 incumber'd Reafon takes its free Courfe 
 v/ithout paffing through the Windings 
 and inextricable Confufion of Sophiilry^ 
 where Innocence and Guilt are contrailed 
 with judicious Impartialiiy; whereRiches, 
 Rank, or Power, never appear to influ- 
 ence; but where the calm determined 
 Voice of Equity, fpeaking with the Or- 
 gans 
 
[ 203 ] 
 
 gans of Truth, not only imprefTes Con- 
 vidion, but even commands Approba- 
 tion from thofe who receive Cenfure or 
 Punifliment. 
 
 I am much pleafed, replies the Nam- 
 REDAL, that you confider this Part of the 
 NoiBLANlnftitution in the fame Light as 
 I do ; other Peculiarities which you have 
 met with fince your Arrival in thefe Regi- 
 ons, I know cannot fo well fuit the active 
 Spirit of a Sublunar Being. — There is a 
 general and amiableTranquillity here, but 
 then it is founded upon Principles which 
 entirely reftrain progreflive Knowledge ; 
 all here think themfelves fufficiently wife, 
 fuiEciently happy ^ they feek to know no 
 more than they are already acquainted 
 with, nor to pofTefs any Thing better 
 than what their Fathers have enjoyed : 
 This will appear to you a mental Lethar- 
 gy, and undoubtedly it is fuch^ but many 
 
 Ad- 
 
[ 204 ] 
 
 Advantages accrue from fuch a Mode of 
 thinking, which are in themfelves fo evi- 
 dent that I need not point them out, 
 elpecially as you will next Week have an 
 Opportunity of hearing fomewhat more 
 at large upon this Topic, when all the 
 Namredals of thelfland come to their 
 annual Conference at Nodnol. 
 
 The Mount of Observation, the 
 Valley of Weeping, the Estralam, 
 Neroma, with other Subjeds worthy of 
 Obfervation, will afford you Matter of very 
 agreeable and not unufeful Speculation. 
 
 Here the Bell of Noon gave Warn- 
 ing for Dinner, and interrupted a Con- 
 verfation which would probably have ex- 
 tended itfelf to a confiderable Length. 
 Here alio, kind Readers, after converfing 
 and travelling fo far together, I hope on 
 friendly Terms, you will think it fit that, 
 
 for 
 
[ 205 ] 
 
 for a while at lead, we fhould part : If 
 you are inclined to accompany me any 
 farther in this extraordinary Progrefs, I 
 fhall attend your Call, and in the mean 
 Time I bid you heartily farewell. 
 
 ne End of the First Volume. 
 
^erms and Phrafes of the Noiblan Lan- 
 guage^ which occur in the following Ac- 
 count of the Ifland, 
 
 Nalsina, a Mediator. 
 Salmina, a Temple. 
 AvozENs, Priefts. 
 Ranevers, Vergers, 
 Snerrunets, Servitors of the Temple. 
 EcARuocNE, a Religious Ceremony. 
 NoTLAM, the Spring of Purification. 
 Aresal, a City. 
 Namredal, Father of a City, 
 Senirats, Wards of a City. 
 RuvENAL, a Square. 
 REquECEx, the Houfe of Juftice. 
 SoLARMAN, the common Cryer. 
 NoDNoL, the Capital of Noibla. 
 Snoissapans, public Schools. 
 NoiTocs, Matters of them. 
 AssELANS, Ulhersc 
 Rayamon, a Year. 
 Reapan, a Month. 
 ToiRTA, a Week. 
 SiLCAR, a Mile. 
 
VI 
 
 Neroma, a defolate Province. 
 Erishnover, the Mountains of Bipod. 
 Omyrchal, the Valley of Weeping. 
 Seitnuocs, Diftrids or Shires. 
 Elknitan, the Bell of Noon. 
 Selbataza, Dinner. 
 AzoNiA, an Aromatic Liquid, 
 Elengal, Virtue. 
 EsTRALAM, a Theatre. 
 Z-AMELA, the Plain of Modefty. 
 Noiglever Genvela, be grateful to God. 
 Maltra Enuthe, the Tree of Health. 
 Maginleb Nalsina elveran Yurne se- 
 
 zivED WAL Phazaz, remember that the 
 
 Mediator fees your Thoughts as well as your 
 
 Actions. 
 BiNEDA, Oh NamredaLjTwanto selben 
 
 Twantastez, temper, Oh Father, Juftice 
 
 with the Dew of Mercy. 
 Retho esol na Lengali, a Foe to Virtue. 
 Retho ettibem Elbal, an artful Wife. 
 Retho slintat Elbal, a tailing Wife. 
 Dosen Alopu, Birds of the Garden. 
 Retho esol na itsedom, a Foe to Modefty. 
 Elbiros," weekly InfpecSlors. 
 
 A Trip 
 
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