Helen Illustrated hy Chris.HaminQnd BOUGHT WITH THE INCOME FROM THE SAGE ENDOWMENT FUND THE GIFT OF Henirg m. Sag* . 1891 AxIMfJi-X Cs>./.r^.L.q..a.3.. 5474 Cornell University Library PR 4644.H4 1896 Helen, 3 1924 013 454 552 Cornell University Library The original of tliis book is in tine Cornell University Library. There are no known copyright restrictions in the United States on the use of the text. http://www.archive.org/details/cu31924013454552 HELEN ^^'q^ ' ''''*V^ She turned away, to raise ike hranches of some shrub, which were droopingfro^n the weight of their Jlowers.—V . 49. HELEN MARIA EDGEWORTH ILLUSTRATED BY CHRIS HAMMOND WITH AN INTRODUCTION BY ANNE THACKERAY RITCHIE MACMILLAN AND CO, Ltd. NEW YORK : THE MACMILLAN CO. 1896 All rights reserzied CO INTRODUCTION Helen — a story which Mrs. Gaskell used to say she thought one of the best of all English novels — is remark- able as a piece of admirable writing. There is an extra- ordinary grip of life in its pages, a brilliant description of some of the best society in England, a deliberate vivacity ; if one may so speak, age had not dimmed the author's brightness of intellect nor divided her from the interests of the generations which had followed upon her own. When Miss Edgeworth was getting to be quite an old woman, long after her father's death, after ten years of silence she once more began to write a novel. It was partly to distract herself from another sorrow, the death of her brother William, a charming and promising young man who was a victim to consumption, as so many of his family had been before him. William died in 1829. ' I would have written to prepare you for the shock,' says Miss Edgeworth in a touching letter to her kind friend, Mr. Strutt — 'a shock I know it was to your kind heart, which has loved father and son and all his family many a long and many a happy year; but years must grow sad even to the most cheerful tempers as friends drop off. What is there left in this world.? I was going to say that had we had any warning ourselves you should have heard from me, but it was so sudden, vii HELEN and we were so deceived by hope. He came home to us from the county of Armagh the 7th of last month : he had then the appearance of a cold and cough, but not more violent nor so violent as he had often had, and been apparently cured of in a few days. He augured ill of himself He said to Mrs. Edgeworth : " It was on the 7th of April that my sister Charlotte died ; don't be surprised if I am dead on the 7th of May." His cough increased and an inflammation of the lungs set in. We had all that medical skill could do for him, and we alternately hoped and feared, but could not believe that he whom we saw so full of life and genius and high thought and noble purpose was so soon, so dreadfully soon, to be no more. After violent fever his strength most rapidly, in the course of a few hours, sank. Early in the morning of the 7 th of May he expired in the arms of his mother-in-law, who, as he most justly said in his will, was to him from the time he could first remember the best of mothers. He preserved his faculties to the last, perfectly clear and calm. He was so happy to be at home with his friends.' Kind Mr. Strutt tried to comfort and to distract. He seems to have sent the mourners a clock, for which Miss Edgeworth writes to thank him. ' Every way interesting it will be to me,' she says, ' as yours, as a subject on which Dr. Darwin and my own dear father's minds have been intent, and as one on which dear William had thought also ' ; she promises to make herself mistress not only of the body but of the soul of the gift. Her father's clocks, she says, require very particular winding ; she thinks of describing one in a Paper for the Royal Society. There is another touching mention of William, and of the feeling of aifection he had inspired in the minds of all those who knew him. ' This is better than fame or wealth,' Maria says. viii INTRODUCTION We read that the grief for her young brother's loss told upon her own health. She was often confined to the sofa, and forbidden to use her pen ; her idle fancy began once more to weave romances, and so it was that she planned the story of Helen and made her notes for it. The work progressed slowly. As she herself recovered she was absorbed in other work and daily preoccupation. There were difficulties in Ireland then as now. Rents, repairs, and tenants to be attended to. We are told that she herself looked after all these : ' the letting of the village houses, the drains, gutters, and pathways, the employment of the poor ; in short, all the hundred and one duties that devolve upon the steward of landed property.' She went straight from the rent-book to her little desk and to the MS. of Helen. ' And yet,' says her stepmother, ' she never wrote fiction with more life and spirit than when she had been for some time with the hard realities of life,' com- bining, as she says herself, with all these practical and necessary occupations, 'thinking three hours a day of Helen to what purpose I dare not say.' One of her sisters, Mrs. Butler, specially encouraged her to go on at a time when she had nearly thrust the work aside in despair. ' I am afraid you will be tired of Helen before you become acquainted with her,' she writes. In 1832 Miss Edgeworth was still at work upon the book which was at last approaching completion ; her only complaint was that she could never do in any day as much as she intended. It had taken her four years to finish the story. Miss Edgeworth had so long accustomed herself to depend on her father's judgment that she dreaded the attempt, which she was urged by her friends to make. ' The doubts with which she wrote had given her less desire to concentrate her energy,' says her stepmother. There is HELEN an affecting account, not quoted by Mr. Hare, of the family once more assembled in the library at Edgeworthstown to listen to the reading of Helen, just as on that sad occasion when Ormond was read so shortly before Mr. Edgeworth's death. The many gaps in the circle, the diffidence of the author, the anxiety of those warmly-attached brothers and sisters as to her success, must have made the meeting a trying one at first, but the brightness and brilliance of the story itself soon cheered them all up ; and certainly, with the exception perhaps of the Absentee and Castle Rackrent, not one of her many books flows on with more life and spirit. It was a feat indeed at her age to be writing, better than ever, and with more point and more grip of her materials. She had been at work for forty years, but the flame was burning still. Her favourite Lady Davenant, moralising upon the characteristic faults of youth and age, exclaims upon the too much of the one and the too little of the other. In youth, the too much of confidence in others, and in them- selves : the too much of enthusiasm, too much of benevo- lence ; in age, alas ! too little. But to Maria herself Lady Davenant's stricture certainly did not apply. The old woman, with all her family round about her, sat there, animated and animating, once more holding them all enthralled as she span out the web of her fancy. ' Oddly enough,' as one of her biographers remarks, ' Helen is the first of Miss Edgeworth's books in which anything to be called love-making really exists.' Until now she had almost entirely denied the existence of romantic love, and used to quote her father's definition : ' Propinquity, pro- pinquity ' ; ' and he was married five times, and twice to heiresses.' But in Helen the characters fall in love because they cannot help it, and feel and speak for themselves, and INTRODUCTION not altogether by rote; absence does not divide their constant hearts. How pretty are the opening lines of the book, and how well this overture suggests the story that is to come. " ' There is Helen in the Lime Walk,' said Mrs. Colling- wood to her husband as she looked out of the window. The slight figure of a young person in deep mourning appeared between the trees. ' How slowly she walks ! she looks very unhappy.' " 'Yes,' said Mr. Collingwood with a sigh, 'she is young to know sorrow and to struggle with difficulties to which she is quite unsuited, both by nature and by education, difficulties which no one could ever have foreseen. How changed are all her prospects.' " ' Changed indeed,' said Mrs. Collingwood, 'pretty young creature. Do you remember how gay she was when first we came to Cecilhurst ? ' " A kindly critic, who has inherited from her mother a love for Miss Edgeworth's writings, asserts that she knows a case in which a conscientious young reader of Helen followed this heroine's example, and refused a young man before he had actually proposed to her. Mrs. S. C. Hall's description of Miss Edgeworth in the latter years of her life is so vivid and characteristic that I can- not do better than quote it here, as, not without some regret, I draw to the close of my little series of introductions : — In person she was very small, — smaller than Hannah More, and with more than Hannah Mora's vivacity of manners ; her face was pale and thin, her features irregular, they may have been considered plain even in youth, but her expression was so benevolent, her manners so entirely well bred, partaking of English dignity and Irish frankness, that you never thought of her in reference either to plainness or beauty — she was all in all ; she occupied, without fatiguing, the attention, charmed by xi HELEN her pleasant voice, while the earnestness and truth that beamed in her bright blue — very blue — eyes made of value every word she uttered. Her words were always well chosen, her manner of expression was graceful and natural, her sentences were frequently epigrammatical. — Extract from the Art Journal. HELEN CHAPTER I ' There is Helen in the lime-walk,' said Mrs. Collingwood to her husband, as she looked out of the window. The slight figure of a young person in deep mourning appeared between the trees. ' How slowly she walks ! She looks very un- happy ! ' ' Yes,' said Mr. Collingwood, with a sigh, ' she is young to know sorrow, and to struggle with difficulties to which she is quite unsuited both by nature and by education, difficulties which no one could ever have foreseen. How changed are all her prospects ! ' ' Changed indeed ! ' said Mrs. Collingwood, ' pretty young creature ! Do you recollect how gay she was when first we came to Cecilhurst ? and even last year, when she had hopes of her uncle's recovery, and when he talked of taking her to London, how she enjoyed the thoughts of going there ! The world was bright before her then. How cruel of that uncle, with all his fondness for her, never to think what was to become of her the moment he was dead : to breed her up as an heiress, and leave her a beggar ! ' ' But what is to be done, my dear ? ' said her husband. ' I am sure I do not know ; I can only feel for her, you must think for her.' ' Then I think I must tell her directly of the state in which her uncle's affiiirs are left, and that there is no provision for her.' ' Not yet, my dear,' said Mrs. Colhngwood : ' I don't mean about there being no provision for herself, that would not B I % HELEN strike her, but her uncle's debts, — there is the point : she would feel dreadfully the disgrace to his memory — she loved him so tenderly ! ' ' Yet it must be told,' said Mr. Collingwood, resolutely ; ' and perhaps it will be better now : she will feel it less, while her mind is absorbed by grief for him.' Helen was the only daughter of Colonel and Lady Anne Stanley ; her parents had both died when she was too young to know her loss, nor had she ever felt till now that she was an orphan, for she had been adopted and brought up with the greatest tenderness by her uncle, Dean Stanley, a man of genius, learning, and sincere piety, with the most affectionate heart, and a highly- cultivated understanding. But on one subject he really had not common sense : in money matters he was inconceivably imprudent and extravagant — extravagant from charity, from taste, from habit. He possessed rich benefices in the church and an ample private fortune, and it was expected that his niece would be a great heiress — he had often said so himself, and his fondness for her confirmed every one in this belief. But the Dean's taste warred against his affection : his too hospitable, magnificent establishment had exceeded his income ; he had too much indulged his passion for all the fine arts, of which he was a liberal patron : he had collected a magnificent library, and had lavished immense sums of money on architectural embellishments. Cursed with too fine a taste, and with too soft a heart — a. heart too well know- ing how to yield — never could he deny himself, much less any other human being, any gratification which money could command ; and soon the necessary consequence was, that he had no money to command, his affairs fell into embarrassment — his estate was sold ; but, as he continued to live with his accustomed hospitality and splendour, the world believed him to be as rich as ever. Some rise superior from the pressure of pecuniary diffi- culties, but that was not the case with Dean Stanley ; not from want of elasticity of mind, but perhaps because his ingenuity continually suggested resources, and his sanguine character led him to plunge into speculat'ons : they failed, and in the anxiety and agitation which his embarrassments occasioned him, he fell into bad health, his physicians ordered him to Italy. Helen, his devoted nurse, the object upon which all his 2 HELEN affections centred, accompanied him to Florence. There his health and spirits seemed at first, by the change of climate, to be renovated ; but in Italy he found fresh temptations to extravagance, his learning and his fancy combined to lead him on from day to day to new expense, and he satisfied his con- science by saying to himself that all the purchases which he now made were only so much capital, which would, when sold in England, bring more than their original price, and would, he flattered himself, increase the fortune he intended for his niece. But one day, while he was actually bargaining for an antique, he was seized with a fit of apoplexy. From this fit he recovered, and was able to return to England with his niece. Here he found his debts and difficulties had been in- creasing ; he was harassed with doubts as to the monied value of his last-chosen chef-d'osuvres ; his mind preyed upon his weakened frame, he was seized with another fit, lost his speech, and, after struggles the most melancholy for Helen to see, conscious as she was that she could do nothing for him, he expired — his eyes fixed on her face, and his powerless hand held between both hers. All was desolation and dismay at the deanery ; Helen was removed to the vicarage by the kindness of the good vicar and his wife, Mr. and Mrs. CoUingwood. It was found that the Dean, instead of leaving a large for- tune, had nothing to leave. All he had laid out at the deanery was sunk and gone ; his real property all sold ; his imaginary wealth, his pictures, statues — his whole collection, even his books, his immense library, shrunk so much in value when estimated after his death, that the demands of the creditors could not be nearly answered ; as to any provision for Miss Stanley, that was out of the question. These were the circumstances which Mrs. CoUingwood feared to reveal, and which Mr. CoUingwood thought should be told immediately to Helen ; but hitherto she had been so much absorbed in sorrow for the uncle she had loved, that no one had ventured on the task. Though Mr. and Mrs. CoUingwood had not known her long (for they had but lately come to" the neighbourhood), they had the greatest sympathy for her orphan state ; and they had seen enough of her during her uncle's illness to make them warmly attached to her. Everybody loved her that knew her, 3 HELEN rich or poor, for in her young prosperity, from her earliest childhood, she had been always sweet-tempered and kind- hearted ; for though she had been bred up in the greatest luxury, educated as heiress to a large fortune, taught every accomplish- ment, used to every fashionable refinement, she was not spoiled — she was not in the least selfish. Indeed, her uncle's indul- gence, excessive though it was, had been always joined with so much affection, that it had early touched her heart, and filled her whole soul with ardent gratitude. It is said that the ill men do lives after them — the good is oft interred with their bones. It was not so with Dean Stanley ; the good he had intended for Helen, his large fortune, was lost and gone ; but the real good he had done for his niece remained in full force, and to the honour of his memory : the excellent education he had given her — it was excellent not merely in the worldly meaning of the word, as regards accomplishments and elegance of manners, but excellent in having given her a firm sense of duty, as the great principle of action, and as the guide of her naturally warm, generous affections. And now, when Helen returned from her walk, Mr. Collingwood, in the gentlest and kindest manner he was able, informed her of the confusion in her uncle's affairs, the debts, the impossibility of paying the creditors, the total loss of all fortune for herself. Mrs. Collingwood had well foreseen the effect this intelli- gence would have on Helen. At first, with fixed incredulous eyes, she could not believe that her uncle could have been in any way to blame. Twice she asked — ' Are you sure — are you certain — is there no mistake?' And when the convic- tion was forced upon her, still her mind did not take in any part of the facts, as they regarded herself. Astonished and shocked, she could feel nothing but the disgrace that would fall upon the memory of her beloved uncle. Then she exclaimed — ' One part of it is not true, I am certain ' ; and hastily leaving the room, she returned imme- diately with a letter in her hand, which, without speaking, she laid before Mr. Collingwood, who wiped his spectacles quickly and read. It was addressed to the poor Dean, and was from an old friend of his, Colonel Munro, stating that he had been suddenly 4 HELEN ordered to India, and was obliged to return a sum of money which the Dean had many years before placed in his hands, to secure a provision for his niece Miss Stanley. This letter had arrived when the Dean was extremely ill. Helen had been afraid to give it to him, and yet thought it right to do so. The moment her uncle had read the letter, which he was still able to do, and to comprehend, though he was unable to speak, he wrote on the back with difficulty, in a sadly trembling hand, yet quite distinctly, these words : — ' That money is yours, Helen Stanley : no one has any claim upon it. When I am gone consult Mr. CoUingwood ; consider him as your guardian.' Mr. CoUingwood perceived that this provision had been made by the Dean for his niece before he had contracted his present debts — many years before, when he had sold his paternal estate — and that, knowing his own disposition to extra- vagance, he had put this sum out of his own power. ' Right — all right, my dear Miss Stanley,' said the vicar ; ' I am very glad — it is all justly yours.' ' No,' said Helen, ' I shall never touch it : take it, my dear Mr. Collingwood, take it, and pay all the debts before any one can complain.' Mr. Collingwood pressed her to him without speaking ; but after a moment's recollection he replied — ' No, no, my dear child, I cannot let you do this : as your guardian, I cannot allow such a young creature as you are, in a moment of feeling, thus to give away your whole earthly fortune — it must not be.' ' It must, indeed it must, my dear sir. Oh, pay everybody at once — directly.' ' No, not directly, at all events,' said Mr. Collingwood — ' certainly not directly : the law allows a year.' ' But if the money is ready,' said Helen, ' I cannot under- stand why the debt should not be paid at once. Is there any law against paying people immediately ? ' Mr. Collingwood half smiled, and on the strength of that half smile Helen concluded that he wholly yielded. 'Yes, do,' cried she, ' send this money this instant to Mr. James, the solicitor: he knows all about it, you say, and he will see everybody paid. ' 'Stay, my dear Miss Stanley,' said the vicar; 'I cannot S ' Take it, my dear Mr. Coiling^uood, fake it, and pay all the debts be/ore any one can complain.' HELEN consent to this, and you should be thankful that I am steady. If I were at this minute to consent, and to do what you desire — pay away your whole fortune, you would repent, and re- proach me with my folly before the end of the year — before six months were over.' ' Never, never,' said Helen. Mrs. CoUingwood strongly took her husband's side of the question. Helen could have no idea, she said, how necessary money would be to her. It was quite absurd to think of living upon air ; could Miss Stanley think she was to go on in this world without money ? Helen said she was not so absurd ; she reminded Mrs. CoUingwood that she should still have what had been her mother's fortune. Before Helen had well got out the words, Mrs. CoUingwood replied — ' That will never do, you will never be able to live upon that ; the interest of Lady Anne Stanley's fortune, I know what it was, would just do for pocket-money for you in the style of life for which you have been educated. Some of your uncle's great friends willy of course, invite you presently, and then you will find what is requisite with that set of people.' ' Some of my uncle's friends perhaps will,' said Helen ; ' but I am not obliged to go to great or fine people, and if I cannot afford it I will not, for I can live independently on what I have, be it ever so little.' Mrs. CoUingwood allowed that if Helen were to live always in the country in retirement, she might do upon her mother's fortune. ' Wherever I live — whatever becomes of me, the debts must be paid — I will do it myself ; and she took up a pen as she spoke — ' I will write to Mr. James by this day's post.' Surprised at her decision of manner and the firmness of one in general so gentle, yielding, and retired, and feeling that he had no legal power to resist, Mr. CoUingwood at last gave way, so far as to agree that he would in due time use this money in satisfying her uncle's creditors ; provided she lived for the next six months within her income. Helen smiled, as if that were a needless proviso. ' I warn you,' continued Mr. CoUingwood, ' that you will most probably find before six months are over that you will want some of this money to pay debts of your own. 7 HELEN ' No, no, no,' cried she ; ' of that there is not the shghtest chance.' 'And now, my dear child,' said Mrs. Collingwood, 'now that Mr. Collingwood has promised to do what you wish, will you do what we wish ? Will you promise to remain with us .' to live here with us, for the present at least ; we will resign you whenever better friends may claim you, but for the present will you try us ? ' ' Try ! ' in a transport of gratitude and affection she could only repeat the words. ' Try ! oh, my dear friends, how happy I am, an orphan, without a relation, to have such a home.' But though Mr. and Mrs. Collingwood, childless as they were, felt real happiness in having such a companion, such an adopted daughter, yet they were sure that some of Dean Stanley's great friends and acquaintance in high life would ask his niece to spend the spring in town, or the summer in the country, with them ; and post after post came letters of condo- lence to Miss Stanley from all these personages of high degree, professing the greatest regard for their dear, amiable friend's memory, and for Miss Stanley, his and their dear Helen ; and these polite and kind expressions were probably sincere at the moment, but none of these dear friends seemed to think of taking any trouble on her account, or to be in the least dis- turbed by the idea of never seeing their dear Helen again in the course of their lives. Helen, quite touched by what was said of her uncle, thought only of him ; but when she showed the letters to Mr. and Mrs. Collingwood, they marked the oversight, and looked signifi- cantly as they read, folded the letters up and returned them to Helen in silence. Afterwards, between themselves, they indulged in certain comments. ' Lady C does not invite her, for she has too many daughters, and they are too ugly, and Helen is too beautiful,' said Mrs. Collingwood. ' Lady L has too many sons,' said Mr. Collingwood, ' and they are too poor, and Helen is not an heiress now.' ' But old Lady Margaret Dawe, who has neither sons nor daughters, what stands in the way there ? Oh ! her delicate health — delicate health is a blessing to some people — excuses them always from doing anything for anybody.' Then came many who hoped, in general, to see Miss HELEN Stanley as soon as possible ; and some who were ' very anxious indeed ' to have their dear Helen with them ; but when or where never specified — and a general invitation, as everybody knows, means nothing but ' Good morning to you.' ' Mrs. Coldstream ends with, " I forbear to say more at present," without giving any reason.' ' And here is the Dean's dear duchess, always in the greatest haste, with "You know my heart," in a parenthesis, "ever and ever most sincerely and affec' — yours." ' •And the Davenants,' continued Mrs. CoUingwood, who were such near neighbours, and who were so kind to the Dean at Florence ; they have not even written ! ' ' But they are at Florence still,' said Mr. CoUingwood ; ' they can hardly have heard of the poor Dean's death.' The Davenants were the great people of this part of the country ; their place, Cecilhurst, was close to the deanery and to the vicarage, but they were not known to the CoUingwoods, who had come to Cecilhurst during the Dean's absence abroad. 'And here is Mrs. Wilmot too,' continued Mrs. CoUing- wood, ' wondering, as usual, at everybody else : wondering that Lady Barker has not invited Miss Stanley to Castleport ; and it never enters into Mrs. Wilmot's head that she might invite her to Wilmot's Fort. And this is friendship, as the world goes ! ' ' And as it has been ever since the beginning of the world, and will be to the end,' replied Mr. CoUingwood. ' Only I thought in Dean Stanley's case — however, I am glad his niece does not see it as we do.' No — with all Helen's natural quickness of sensibility, she suspected nothing, saw nothing in each excuse but what was perfectly reasonable and kind ; she was sure that her uncle's friends could not mean to neglect her. In short, she had an undoubting belief in those she loved, and she loved all those who she thought had loved her uncle, or who had ever shown her kindness. Helen had never yet experienced neglect or detected insincerity, and nothing in her own true and warm heart could suggest the possibility of double-dealing, or even of coldness in friendship. She had yet to learn that No after-friendship e'er can raze Th' endearments of our early days. And ne'er the heart such fondness prove, 9 HELEN As when it first began to love ; Ere lovely nature is expelled, And friendship is romantic held. But prudence comes with hundred eyes, The veil is rent, the vision flies, The dear illusions will not last, The era of enchantment's past : The wild romance of life is done, The real history begun ! CHAPTER II Some time after this, Mr. Collingwood, rising from the break- fast-table, threw down the day's paper, saying there was nothing in it ; Mrs. Collingwood glancing her eye over it exclaimed — ' Do you call this nothing ? Helen, hear this ! ' "Marriage in high life. — At the Ambassador's chapel, Paris, on the 1 6th instant, General Clarendon to Lady CeciUa Davenant, only daughter of Earl and Countess Davenant." ' ' Married ! absolutely married ! ' exclaimed Helen : ' I knew it was to be, but so soon I did not expect. Ambassa- dor's chapel — where did you say ? — Paris ? No, that must be a mistake, they are all at Florence — settled there, I thought their letters said.' Mrs. Collingwood pointed to the paragraph, and Helen saw it was certainly Paris — there could be no mistake. Here was a full account of the marriage, and a list of all ' the fashion- ables who attended the fair bride to the hymeneal altar. Her father gave her away.' ' Then certainly it is so,' said Helen ; and she came to the joyful conclusion that they must all be on their way home : — ' Dear Lady Davenant coming to Cecilhurst again ! ' Lady CeciUa, ' the fair bride,' had been Helen's most in- timate friend ; they had been when children much together, for the deanery was so close to Cecilhurst that the shrubbery opened into the park. 'But is it not rather extraordinary, my dear Helen,' said Mrs. Collingwood, ' that you should see this account of your lo HELEN dear Lady Cecilia's marriage in the public papers only, without having heard of it from any of your friends themselves — not one letter, not one line from any of them ? ' A cloud came over Helen's face, but it passed quickly, and she was sure they had written — something had delayed their letters. She was certain Lady Davenant or Lady Ceciha had written ; or, if they had not, it was because they could not possibly, in such a hurry, such agitation as they must have been in. At all events, whether they had written or not, she was certain they could not mean anything unkind ; she could not change her opinion of her friend for a letter more or less. ' Indeed ! ' said Mrs. Collingwood ; ' how long is it since you have seen them ? ' ' About two years ; just two years it is since I parted from them at Florence.' ' And you have corresponded with Lady Cecilia constantly ever since ? ' asked Mrs. Collingwood. ' Not constantly.' ' Not constantly — oh ! ' said Mrs. Collingwood, in a pro- longed and somewhat sarcastic tone. ' Not constantly — so much the better,' said her husband : 'a constant correspondence is always a great burthen, and moreover, sometimes a great evil, between young ladies especi- ally — I hate the sight of ladies' long cross-barred letters.' Helen said that Lady Cecilia's letters were never cross-barred, always short and far between. 'You seem wonderfully fond of Lady Cecilia,' said Mrs. Collingwood. ' Not wonderfully,' replied Helen, ' but very fond, and no wonder, we were bred up together. And,' continued she, after a little pause — ' and if Lady Cecilia had not been so generous as she is, she might have been — she must have been, jealous of the partiality, the fondness, which her mother always showed me.' ' But was not Lady Davenant's heart large enough to hold two ? ' asked Mrs. Collingwood. ' Was not she fond of her daughter ? ' ' Yes, as far as she knew her, but she did not know Lady Cecilia.' ' Not know her own daughter ! ' Mr. and Mrs. Collingwood both at once exclaimed. ' How could that possibly be ? ' HELEN 'Very easily,' Helen said, 'because she saw so little of her.' ' Was not Lady Cecilia educated at home ? ' ' Yes, but still Lady Cecilia, when a child, was all day long with her governess, and at Cecilhurst the governess's apartments were quite out of the way, in one of the wings at the end of a long corridor, with a separate staircase ; she might as well have been in another house.' ' Bad arrangement,' said Mr. Collingwood, speaking to himself as he stood on the hearth. ' Bad arrangement which separates mother and daughter.' ' At that time,' continued Helen, ' there was always a great deal of company at Cecilhurst. Lord Davenant was one of the ministers then. I believe — I know he saw a great many political people, and Lady Davenant was forced to be always with them talking.' ' Talking ! yes, yes ! ' said Mr. Collingwood, ' I understand it all. Lady Davenant is a great politician, and female politicians, with their heads full of the affairs of Europe, cannot have time to think of the affairs of their families.' ' What is the matter, my dear Helen ? ' said Mrs. Colling- wood, taking her hand. Helen had tears in her eyes and looked unhappy. ' I have done very wrong,' said she : ' I have said something that has given you a bad, a false opinion of one for whom I have the greatest admiration and love — of Lady Davenant. I am excessively sorry ; I have done very wrong.' ' Not the least, my dear child ; you told us nothing but what everybody knows — that she is a great politician ; you told us no more.' ' But I should have told you more, and what nobody knows better than I do,' cried Helen, ' that Lady Davenant is a great deal more, and a great deal better, than a politician. I was too young' to judge, you may think, but, young as I was, I could see and feel, and children can and do often see a great deal into character, and I assure you Lady Davenant's is a sort of deep, high character that you would admire.' Mrs. Collingwood observed with surprise that Helen spoke of her with even more enthusiasm than of her dear Lady Cecilia. ' Yes, because she is a person more likely to excite enthu- siasm.' HELEN ' You^did not feel afraid of her, then ? ' ' I do not say that,' rephed- Helen ; ' yet it was not fear exactly, it was more a sort of aWe, but still I liked it. It is so delightful to have something to look up to. I love Lady Davenant all the better, even for that awe I felt of her.' 'And I like you all the better for everything you feel, think, and say about your friends,' cried Mrs. Collingwood ; ' but let us see what they will do ; when I see whether they can write, and what they write to you, I will tell you more of my mind — if any letters come.' ' If — ! ' Helen repeated, but would say no more — and there it rested, or at least stopped. By common consent the subject was not recurred to for several days. Every morning at post- time Helen's colour rose with expectation, and then faded with disappointment ; still, with the same confiding look, she said, ' I am sure it is not their fault.' ' Time will show,' said Mrs. Collingwood. At length, one morning when she came down to breakfast, ' Triumph, my dear Helen ! ' cried Mrs. Collingwood, holding up two large letters, all scribbled over with ' Try this place and try that, missent to Cross-keys — Over moor, and Heaven knows where — and — no matter.' Helen seized the packets and tore them open ; one was from Paris, written immediately after the news of Dean Stanley's death ; it contained two letters, one from Lady Davenant, the other from Lady Cecilia — ' written, only think ! ' cried she, ' how kind ! — the very day before her marriage : signed " Cecilia Davenant, for the last time," — and Lady Davenant, too — to think of me in all their happiness.' She opened the other letters, written since their arrival in England, she read eagerly on,- — then stopped, and her looks changed. ' Lady Davenant is not coming to Cecilhurst. Lord Davenant is to be sent ambassador to Petersburg, and Lady Davenant will go along with him ! Oh ! there is an end of everything, I shall never see her again ! Stay — she is to be first with Lady Cecilia at Clarendon Park, wherever that is, for some time — she does not know how long — she hopes to see me there — oh ! how kind, how delightful ! ' Helen put Lady Davenant's letter proudly into Mrs. Col- lingwood's hand, and eagerly opened Lady Cecilia's. 13 HELEN ' So like herself ! so like Cecilia,' cried she. Mrs. CoUing- wood read, and acknowledged that nothing could be kinder, for here was an invitation, not vague or general, but particular, and pressing as heart could wish or heart could make it. ' We shall be at Clarendon Park on Thursday, and shall expect you, dearest Helen, on Monday — just time, the General says, for an answer ; so write and say where horses shall meet you,' etc. etc. ' Upon my word, this is being in earnest, when it comes to horses meeting,' cried Mr. Collingwood. ' Of course you will go directly ? ' Helen was in great agitation. ' Write — write — my dear, directly,' said Mrs. Collingwood, 'for the post-boy waits.' And before she had written many lines the Cross-post boy sent up word that he could wait no longer. Helen wrote she scarcely knew what, but in short an accept- ance, signed, sealed, delivered, and then she took breath. Off cantered the boy with the letters bagged, and scarcely was he out of sight, when Helen saw under the table the cover of the packet, in which were some lines that had not yet been read. They were in Lady Cecilia's handwriting — a postscript. ' I forgot, dear Helen, the thing that is most essential (you remember our friend Dumont's definition of une betise : c'est d'oudlier la chose essentiellc) — I forgot to tell you that the General declares he will not hear of a mere visit from you. He bids me tell you that it must be " till death or marriage." So, my dear friend, you must make up your mind in short to live with us till you find a General Clarendon of your own. To this postscript no reply — silence gives consent.' ' If I had seen this ! ' said Helen, as she laid it before Mr. and Mrs. Collingwood ; ' I ought to have answered, but, indeed, I never saw it ' ; she sprang forward instantly to ring the bell, exclaiming, ' It is time yet — stop the boy — " silence gives consent." I must write. I cannot leave you, my dear friends, in this way. I did not see that postscript, believe me I did not.' They believed her, they thanked her, but they would not let her ring the bell ; they said she had better not bind herself in any way either to themselves or to Lady Cecilia. Accept of the present invitation she must — she must go to see her 14 I ' E J " II iS ll'llir w "'■ ■'! "i ■^ ^^r j-^(7^ the hoy.' HELEN friend on her marriage ; she must take leave of her dear Lady Davenant before her departure. ' They are older friends than we are,' said Mr. CoUingwood, ' they have the first claim upon you ; but let us think of it as only a visit now. As to a residence for life, that you can best judge of for yourself after you have been some time at Clarendon Park ; if you do not like to remain there, you know how gladly we shall welcome you here again, my child ; or, if you decide to live with those you have known so long and loved so much, we cannot be offended at your choice.' This generous kindness, this freedom from jealous suscepti- bility, touched Helen's heart and increased her agitation. She could not bear the thoughts of either the reality or appearance of neglecting these kind good people the moment she had other prospects, and frequently, in all the hurry of her prepara- tions, she repeated, ' It will only be a visit at Clarendon Park. I will return to you ; I shall write to you, my dear Mrs. CoUing- wood, at all events, constantly.' When Mr. CoUingwood gave her his parting blessing he reminded her of his warning about her fortune. Mrs. CoUing- wood reminded her of her promise to write. The carriage drove from the door. Helen's heart was full of the friends she was leaving, but by degrees the agitation of the parting subsided, her tears ceased, her heart grew lighter, and the hopes of seeing her friends at Clarendon Park arose bright in her mind, and her thoughts all turned upon Cecilia and Lady Davenant. CHAPTER III Helen looked eagerly out of the carriage window for the first view of Clarendon Park. It satisfied — it surpassed her expectations. It was a fine, aristocrp,tic place : ancestral trees, and a vast expanse of park ; herds of deer, yellow and dark, or spotted, their heads appearing in the distance just above the fern, or grazing near, startled as the carriage passed. Through the long approach she caught various views of the house, partly gothic, partly of modern architecture ; it seemed of great extent and magnificence. i6 HELEN All delightful so far ; but now for her own reception. Her breath grew quick and quicker as she came near and nearer to the house. Some one was standing on the steps. Was it General Clarendon ? No ; only a servant. The carriage stopped, more servants appeared, and as Helen got out, a very sublime-looking personage informed her that ' Lady Cecilia and the General were out riding — only in the park — would be in immediately.' And as she crossed the great hall, the same sublime person informed her that there would be still an hour before dinner- time, and inquired whether she would be pleased to be shown to her own apartment, or to the library. Helen felt chilled and disappointed, because this was not exactly the way she had expected things would be upon her arrival. She had pictured to herself Cecilia running to meet her in the hall. Without answering the groom of the chambers, she asked, ' Is Lady Davenant out too ? ' ' No ; her ladyship is in the library.' ' To the library then.' And through the antechamber she passed rapidly, impatient of a momentary stop of her conductor to open the folding-doors, while a man, with a letter-box in hand, equally impatient, begged that Lady Davenant might be told 'the General's express was waiting.' Lady Davenant was sealing letters in great haste for this express, but when the door opened, and she saw Helen, she threw wax and letter from her, and pushing aside the sofa- table, came forward to receive her with open arms. All was in an instant happy in Helen's heart ; but there was the man of the letter-box : he must be attended to. ' Beg your pardon, Helen, my dear — one moment. Letters of con- sequence — must not be delayed.' By the time the letters were finished, before they were gone. Lady Cecilia came in. The same as ever, with affectionate delight in her eyes — ^her beautiful eyes. The same, yes, the same Cecilia as ever ; yet different : less of a girl, less lively, but more happy. The moment she had embraced her, Lady Cecilia turned quick to present General Clarendon, thinking he had followed, but he had stopped in the hall. ' Send off the letters,' were the first words of his which Helen heard. The tone commanding, the voice remarkably C 17 HELEN gentlemanlike. An instant afterwards he came in. A fine figure, a handsome man ; in the prime of life ; with a high- born, high-bred military air. English decidedly — ^proudly English. Something of the old school — composed self-posses- sion, with voluntary deference to others — rather distant. Helen felt that his manner of welcoming her to Clarendon Park was perfectly polite, yet she would have liked it better had it been less polite — more cordial. Lady Cecilia, whose eyes were anxiously upon her, drew her arm within hers, and hurried her out of the room. She stopped at the foot of the stairs, gathered up the folds of her riding-dress, and turning suddenly to Helen, said — ' Helen, my dear, you must not think that ' ' Think what ? ' said Helen. ' Think that — for which you are now blushing. Oh, you know what I mean ! Helen, your thoughts are just as legible in your face as they always were to me. His manner is reserved — cold, maybe — but not his heart. Understand this, pray — once for all. Do you ? will you, dearest Helen ? ' ' I do, I will,' cried Helen ; and every minute she felt that she better understood and was more perfectly pleased with her friend. Lady Cecilia showed her through the apartment destined for her, which she had taken the greatest pleasure in arranging : everything there was not only most comfortable, but particularly to her taste ; and some little delicate proofs of affection, recollections of childhood, were there, — keepsakes, early drawings, nonsensical things, not worth preserving, but still preserved. ' Look how near we are together,' said Cecilia, opening a door into her own dressing-room. 'You may shut this up whenever you please, but I hope you will never please to do so. You see how 1 leave you your own free will, as friends usually do, with a proviso, a hope at least, that you are never to use it on any account — like the child's half-guinea pocket- money, never to be changed.' Her playful tone relieved, as she intended it should, Helen's too keen emotion ; and this too was felt with the quickness with which every touch of kindness ever was felt by her. Helen pressed her friend's hand, and smiled without speaking. They were to be some time alone before the commence- ment of bridal visits, and an expected succession of troops of i8 HELEN friends. This was a time of peculiar enjoyment to Helen : she had leisure to grow happy in the feeling of reviving hopes from old associations. She did not forget her promise to write to Mrs. CoUing- wood ; nor afterwards (to her credit be it here marked) — even when the house was full of company, and when, by amusement or by feeling, she was most pressed for time — did she ever omit to write to those excellent friends. Those who best know the difficulty will best appreciate this proof of the reality of her gratitude. As Lady Cecilia was a great deal with her husband riding or walking, Helen had opportunities of being much alone with Lady Davenant, who now gave her a privilege that she had enjoyed in former times at Cecilhurst, that of entering her apartment in the morning at all hours without fear of being considered an intruder. The first morning, however, on seeing her ladyship immersed in papers with a brow of care, deeply intent, Helen paused on the threshold, 'I am afraid I interrupt — I am afraid I disturb you.' ' Come in, Helen, come in,' cried Lady Davenant, looking up, and the face of care was cleared, and there was a radiance of pleasure. ' Interrupt — yes ; disturb — no. Often in your little life, Helen, you have interrupted — never disturbed me. From the time you were a child till this moment, never did I see you come into my room without pleasure.' Then sweeping away heaps of papers, she made room for Helen on the sofa beside her. ' Now tell me how things are with you — somewhat I have heard reported of my friend the Dean's affairs — tell me all.' Helen told all as briefly as possible ; she hurried on through her uncle's affairs with a tremulous voice, and before she could come to a conclusion Lady Davenant exclaimed — ' I foresaw it long since : with all my friend's virtues, all his talents — but we will not go back upon the painful past. You, my dear Helen, have done just what I should have expected from you, — right; — right, too, the condition Mr. Collingwood has made — very right. And now to the next point : — where are you to live, Helen ? or rather with whom ? ' Helen was not quite sure yet ; she said she had not quite determined. 19 HELEN 'Am I to understand that your doubt lies between the Collingwoods and my daughter ? ' ' Yes ; Ceciha most kindly invited me, but 1 do not know General Clarendon yet, and he does not know me yet. Cecilia might wish most sincerely that I should live with her, and I am convinced she does ; but her husband must be considered.' ' True,' said Lady Davenant — ' true ; a husband is certainly a thing to be cared for — in Scottish phrase, and General Clarendon is no doubt a person to be considered, — but it seems that I am not a person to be considered in your arrangements.' Even the altered, dry, and almost acrid tone in which Lady Davenant spoke, and the expression of disappointment in her countenance, were, as marks of strong affection, deeply grati- fying to Helen. Lady Davenant went on — 'Was not Cecilhurst always a home to you, Helen Stanley ? ' ' Yes, yes, — always a most happy home ! ' ' Then why is not Cecilhurst to be your home ? ' 'My dear Lady Davenant! how kind! — how very, very kind of you to wish it — but I never thought of ' ' And why did you not think of it, Helen ? ' ' I mean — I thought you were going to Russia.' ' And have you settled, my dear Helen,' said Lady Davenant, smiling — ' have you settled that I am never to come back from Russia ? Do not you know that you are — that you ever were — you ever will be to me a daughter?' and drawing Helen fondly towards her, she added, ' as my own very dear — I must not say dear^rf child, — must not, because as I well remember once — little creature as you were then — you whispered to me, " Never call me dear^j/," — generous-hearted child ! ' And tears started into her eyes as she spoke ; but at that moment came a knock at the door. ' A packet from Lord Davenant, by Mr. Mapletoffi, my lady.' Helen rose to leave the room, but Lady Davenant laid a detaining hand upon her, saying, ' You will not be in my way in the least ' ; and she opened her packet, adding that while she read Helen might amuse herself ' with arranging the books on that table, or in looking over the letters in that portfolio.' HELEN Helen had hitherto seen Lady Davenant only with the eyes of very early youth ; but now, after an absence of two years — a great space in her existence — it seemed as if she looked upon her with new eyes, and every hour made fresh discoveries in her character. Contrary to what too often happens when we again see and judge of those whom we have early known. Lady Davenant's character and abilities, instead of sinking and diminishing, appeared to rise and enlarge, to expand and be ennobled to Helen's view. Strong lights and shades there were, but these only excited and fixed her attention. Even her defects — those inequalities of temper of which she had already had some example, were interesting' as evidences of the power and warmth of her affections. The books on the table were those which Lady Davenant had had in her travelling carriage. They gave Helen an idea of the range and variety of the reader's mind. Some of them were presentation copies, as they are called, from several of the first authors of our own and foreign countries ; some with dedications to Lady Davenant ; others with inscriptions expressing respect or propitiating favour, or anxious for judgment. The portfolio contained letters whose very signatures would have driven the first of modern autograph-collectors distracted with joy — whose meanest scrap would make a scrap-book the envy of the world. But among the letters in this portfolio there were none of those nauseous notes of compliment, none of those epistles adulatory, degrading to those who write, and equally degrading to those to whom they are written : letters which are, how- ever cleverly turned, inexpressibly wearisome to all but the parties concerned. After opening and looking at the signature of several of these letters, Helen sat in a delightful embarras de richesse. To read them all — all at once, was impossible ; with which to begin she could not determine. One after another was laid aside as too good to be read first, and after glancing at the contents of each, she began to deal them round alphabetically till she was struck by a passage in one of them — she looked to the signature, it was unknown to fame — she read the whole, it was striking and interesting. There were several letters in the same hand, and Helen was surprised to find them 21 HELEN arranged according to their dates, in Lady Davenant's own writing — preserved with those of persons of illustrious reputa- tion ! These she read on without further hesitation. There was no sort of affectation in them — quite easy and natural, ' real feeling, and genius,' certainly genius, she thought ! — and there seemed something romantic and uncommon in the character of the writer. They were signed ' Granville Beauclerc ! ' Who could he be, this Granville Beauclerc ? She read on till Lady Davenant, having finished her packet, rang a silver handbell, as was her custom, to summon her page. At the first tinkle of the bell Helen started, and Lady Davenant asked, ' Whose letter, my dear, has so completely abstracted you ? ' Carlos, the page, came in at this instant, and after a quick glance at the handwriting of the letters, Lady Davenant gave her orders in Portuguese to Carlos, and then returning to Helen, took no further notice of the letters, but went on just where she had left off. ' Helen, I remember when you were about nine years old, timid as you usually were, your coming forward, bold as a little lion, to attack me in Cecilia's defence ; I forget the particulars, but I recollect that you said I was unjust, and that I did not know Cecilia, and there you were right ; so, to reward you, you shall see that now I do her perfect justice, and that I am as fond of her as your heart can wish. I really never did know Cecilia till I saw her heartily in love : I had imagined her incapable of real love ; I thought the desire of pleasing universally had been her ruling passion — the ruling passion that of a little mind and a cold heart ; but I did her wrong. In another more material point, too, I was mistaken.' Lady Davenant paused and looked earnestly at Helen, whose eyes said, ' I am glad,' and yet she was not quite certain she knew to what she alluded. ' Cecilia righted herself, and won my good opinion, by the openness with which she treated me from the very commence- ment of her attachment to General Clarendon.' Lady Davenant again paused to reflect, and played for some moments with the tablets in her hand. ' Some one says that we are apt to flatter ourselves that we leave our faults when our faults leave us, from change of 22 HELEN situation, age, and so forth ; and perhaps it does not signify much which it is, if the faults are fairly gone, and if there be no danger of their returning : all our former misunderstandings arose on CeciHa's part from cowardice of character ; on mine from — no matter what — no matter which of us was most wrong.' ' True, true,' cried Helen eagerly ; and, anxious to prevent recurrence to painful recollections, she went on to ask rapidly several questions about Cecilia's marriage. Lady Davenant smiled, and promised that she should have the whole history of the marriage in true gossip detail. ' When I wrote to you, I gave you some general ideas on the subject, but there are little things which could not well be written, even to so safe a young friend as you are, for what is written remains, and often for those by whom it was never intended to be seen : the dessoux des cartes can seldom be either safely or satisfactorily shown on paper ; so give me my embroidery-frame, I never can tell well without having some- thing to do with my hands.' And as Helen set the embroidery-frame. Lady Davenant searched for some skeins of silk and silk winders. ' Take these, my dear, and wind this silk for me, for I must have my hearer comfortably established, not like the agonised listener in the World leaning against a table, with the corner running into him all the time.' CHAPTER IV ' I MUST go back,' continued Lady Davenant, ' quite to the dark ages, the time when I knew nothing of my daughter's character but by the accidental lights which you afforded me. I will take up my story before the reformation, in the middle ages, when you and your dear uncle left us at Florence ; about two years ago, when Cecilia was in the height of her conquests, about the time when a certain Colonel D'Aubigny flourished, — you remember him ? ' Helen answered ' Yes,' in rather a constrained voice, which caused Lady Davenant to look up, and on seeing that look of 23 HELEN inquiry, Helen coloured, though she would have given the world not to be so foolish. The affair was Cecilia's, and Helen only wished not to have it recurred to, and yet she had now, by colouring, done the very thing to fix Lady Davenant's attention, and as the look was prolonged, she coloured more and more. ' I see 1 was wrong,' said Lady Davenant : ' 1 had thought Colonel D'Aubigny's ecstasy about that miniature of you was only a feint ; but 1 see he really was an admirer of yours, Helen ?' ' Of mine ! oh no, never ! ' Still from her fear of saying something that should implicate Cecilia, her tone, though she spoke exactly the truth, was not to Lady Davenant's discrimi- native ear quite natural. Helen, seeing doubt, added — ' Impossible, my dear Lady Davenant ! you know I was then so young, quite a child ! ' ' No, no, not quite ; two from eighteen and sixteen remain, 1 think, and in our days sixteen is not absolutely a child.' Helen made no answer ; her thoughts had gone back to the time when Colonel D'Aubigny was first introduced to her, which was just before her uncle's illness, and when her mind had been so engrossed by him, that she had but a confused recollection of all the rest. ' Now you are right, my dear,' said Lady Davenant ; ' right to be absolutely silent. In difficult cases say nothing ; but still you are wrong in sitting so uneasily under it, for that seems as if there was something.' ' Nothing upon earth ! ' cried Helen, ' if you would not look at me so, my dear Lady Davenant.' ' Then, my dear Helen, do not break my embroidery silk ; that jerk was imprudent, and trust me, my dear, the screw of that silk winder is not so much to blame as you would have me think ; take patience vnth yourself and with me. There is no great harm done, no unbearable imputation, you are not accused of loving or liking, only of having been admired.' ' Never ! ' cried Helen. ' Well, well ! it does not signify in the least novif : the man is either dying or dead.' ' I am glad of it,' cried Helen. ' How barbarous ! ' said Lady Davenant ; ' but let it pass, I am neither glad nor sorry : contempt is more dignified and safer than hatred, my dear. 24 HELEN ' Now to return to Cecilia ; soon after, I will not say the D'Aubigny era, but soon after you left us, I fell sick, — Cecilia was excessively kind to me. In kindness her affectionate heart never failed, and I felt this the more, from a consciousness that I had been a little harsh to her. I recovered but slowly ; I could not bear to have her confined so long in a sick-room, and yet I did not much like either of the chaperons with whom she went out, though they were both of rank, and of unim- peachable character — the one English, one of the best women in the world, but the most stupid ; the other a foreigner, one of the most agreeable women in the world, but the most false. I prevailed on Cecilia to break off that — I do not know what to call it, friendship it was not — and my daughter and I drew nearer together. Better times began to dawn ; but still there was little sympathy between us : my mind was intent on Lord Davenant's interests, hers on amusement and admiration. Her conquests were numerous, and she gloried in their number, for, between you and me, Cecilia was, before the reformation, not a little of a coquette. You will not allow it, you did not see it, you did not go out with her, and being three or four years younger, you could not be a very good critic of Cecilia's conduct ; and depend upon it I am right, she was not a little of a coquette. She did not know, and I am sure I did not know, that she had a heart, till she became acquainted with General Clarendon. ' The first time we met him,' — observing a quickening of attention in Helen's eyes. Lady Davenant smiled, and said, ' Young ladies always like to hear of " the first time we saw him." — -The first time we saw General Clarendon was — for- give me the day of the month — in the gallery at Florence. I forget how it happened that he had not been presented to me — to Lord Davenant he must have been. But so it was, and it was new to Cecilia to see a man of his appearance who had not on his first arrival shown himself ambitious to be made known to her. He was admiring a beautiful Magdalene, and he was standing with his back towards us. I recollect that his appearance when I saw him as a stranger — the time when one can best judge of appearance — struck me as that of a dis- tinguished person ; but little did I think that there stood Cecilia's husband ! so little did my maternal instinct guide me. ' As we approached, he turned and gave one look at Cecilia ; 25 HELEN she gave one look at him. He passed on ; she stopped me to examine the picture which he had been admiring. ' Every Enghsh mother at Florence, except myself, had their eyes fixed upon General Clarendon from the moment of his arrival. But whatever I may have been, or may have been supposed to be, on the great squares of politics, I believe I never have been accused or even suspected of being a manceuvrer on the small domestic scale. ' My reputation for imbecility in these matters was perhaps advantageous. He did not shun me as he did the tribe of knowing ones ; a hundred reports flew about concerning him, settling in one, that he was resolved never to marry. Yet he was a passionate admirer of beauty and grace, and it was said that he had never been unsuccessful where he had wished to please. The secret of his resolution against marriage was accounted for by the gossiping public in many ways variously absurd. The fact was, that in his own family, and in that of a particular friend, there had been about this time two or three scandalous intrigues, followed by " the public brand of shameful life." One of these " sad affairs," as they are styled, was marked with premeditated treachery and turpitude. The lady had been, or had seemed to be, for years a pattern wife, the mother of several children ; yet she had long betrayed, and at last abandoned, a most amiable and confiding husband, and went off with a man who did not love her, who cared for nought but himself, a disgusting monster of selfishness, vanity, and vice ! This woman was said to have been once good, but to have been corrupted and depraved by residence abroad — by the contagion of foreign profligacy. In the other instance, the seduced wife had been originally most amiable, pure- minded, uncommonly beautiful, loved to idolatry by her husband, Clarendon's particular friend, a man high in public estimation. The husband shot himself. The seducer was, it is said, the lady's first love. That these circumstances should have made a deep impression on Clarendon is natural ; the more feeling — the stronger the mind, the more deep and last- ing it was likely to be. Besides his resolution against marriage in general, we heard that he had specially resolved against marrying any travelled lady, and most especially against any woman with whom there was danger of a first love. How this danger was to be avoided or ascertained mothers and 26 ' As we approaclwd, he turned and gave one look at Cecilia; she gave one look at him,.' HELEN daughters looked at one another, and did not ask, or at least did not answer. ' Cecilia, apparently unconcerned, heard and laughed at these high resolves, after her gay fashion, with her young com- panions, and marvelled how long the resolution would be kept. General Clarendon, of course, could not but be introduced to us, could not but attend our assemblies, nor could he avoid meeting us in all the good English and foreign society at Florence ; but whenever he met us, he always kept at a safe distance : this caution marked his sense of danger. To avoid its being so construed, perhaps, he made approaches to me, politely cold ; we talked very wisely on the state of the Continent and the affairs of Europe ; I did not, however, confine myself or him to politics, I gave him many unconscious opportunities of showing in conversation, not his abilities, for they are nothing extraordinary ; but his character, which is first-rate. Gleams came out of a character born to subjugate, to captivate, to attach for life. It worked first on Cecilia's curiosity ; she thought she was only curious, and she listened at first, hum- ming an opera air between times, with the least concerned look conceivable. But her imagination was caught, and thenceforward through everything that everybody else might be saying, and through all she said herself, she heard every word that fell from our General, and even all that was repeated of his saying at second or third hand. So she learned in due season that he had seen women as handsome, handsomer than Lady Cecilia Davenant ; but that there was something in her manner peculiarly suited to his taste — his fastidious taste ! so free from coquetry, he said she was. And true, perfectly true, from the time he became acquainted with her : no hypocrisy on her part, no mistake on his ; at the first touch of a real love, there was an end of vanity and coquetry. Then her deference — her affection for her mother, was so charming, he thought ; such perfect confidence — such quick intelligence between us. No deceit here either, only a little self-deception on Cecilia's part. She had really grown suddenly fonder of me ; what had become of her fear she did not know. But I knew full well my new charm and my real merit : I was a good and safe conductor of the electric shock. ' It chanced one day, when I was listening only as one listens to a man who is talking at another through oneself, I 28 HELEN did not immediately catch the meaning, or I believe hear what the General said. Cecilia, unawares, answered for me, and showed that she perfectly understood : — he bowed — she blushed. ' Man is usually quick-sighted to woman's blushes. But our General was not vain, only proud ; the blush he did not set down to his own account, but very much to hers. It was a proof, he thought, of so much simplicity of heart, so unspoiled by the world, so unlike — in short, so like the very woman he had painted in his fancy, before he knew too much Lady Cecilia was now a perfect angel. Not one word of all this did he say, but it was understood quite as well as if it had been spoken : his lips were firm compressed, and the whole outer man composed — frigidly cold ; — yet through all this Cecilia saw — such is woman's penetration in certain cases — Cecilia saw what must sooner or later happen. He, still proud of his prudence, refrained from word, look, or sigh, resolved to be impassive till his judgment should be perfectly satisfied. At last this judgment was perfectly satisfied ; that is, he was passionately in love — fairly " caught," my dear, " in the strong toils of grace," and he threw himself at Cecilia's feet. She was not quite so much surprised as he expected, but more pleased than he had ventured to hope. There was that, how- ever, in his proud humility, which told Cecilia there must be no trifling. He either fears his fate too much. Or his deserts are small, Who dare not put it to the touch, To win or lose it all. He put it to the test, and won it all. General Clarendon, indeed, is a man likely to win and keep the love of woman, for this, among other good reasons, that love and honour being vnth him inseparable, the idol he adores must keep herself at the height to which he has raised her, or cease to receive his adoration. She must be no common vulgar idol for every passing worshipper.' As Lady Davenant paused, Helen looked up, hesitated, and said, ' I hope that General Clarendon is not disposed to jealousy.' ' No ; he's too proud to be jealous,' replied Lady Davenant. Are proud men never jealous ? thought Helen. 29 HELEN ' I mean,' continued Lady Davenant, ' that General Claren- don is too proud to be jealous of his wife. For aught I know, he might have felt jealousy of Cecilia before she was his, for then she was but a woman, like another ; but once HIS — once having set his judgment on the cast, both the virtues and the defects of his character join in security for his perfect confidence in the wife "his choice and passion both approve." From temper and principle he is unchangeable. I acknowledge that I think the General is a little inclined perhaps to obstinacy ; but, as Burke says, though obstinacy is certainly a vice, it happens that the whole line of the great and masculine virtues, constancy, fidelity, fortitude, magnanimity, are closely allied to this disagreeable quality, of which we have so just an abhorrence. ' It is most peculiarly happy for Cecilia that she has a husband of this firm character, one on whom she can rely — one to whom she may, she must, look up, if not always, yet upon all important occasions where decision is necessary, or integrity required. It is between her and her General as it should be in marriage, each has the compensating qualities to those which the other possesses : General Clarendon is inferior to Cecilia in wit, but superior in judgment ; inferior in litera- ture, superior in knowledge of the world ; inferior to my daughter altogether in abilities, in what is called genius, but far superior in that ruling power, strength of mind. Strength of mind is an attaching as well as a ruling power : all human creatures, women especially, become attached to those who have power over their minds. Yes, Helen, I am satisfied with their marriage, and with your congratulations : yours are the sort I like. Vulgar people — by vulgar people I mean all who think vulgarly — very great vulgar people have congratulated me upon this establishment of my daughter's fortune and future rank (a dukedom in view), all that could be wished in worldly estimation. But I rejoice in it as the security for my daughter's character and happiness. Thank you again, my dear young friend, for your sympathy ; you can understand me, you can feel with me.' Sympathy, intelligent, quick, warm, unwearied, unweariable, such as Helen's, is really a charming accomplishment in a friend ; the only obligation a proud person is never too proud to receive ; and it was most gratifying to Helen to be allowed 3° HELEN to sympathise with Lady Davenant — one who, in general, never spoke of herself, or unveiled her private feelings, even to those who lived with her on terms of intimacy. Helen felt responsible for the confidence granted to her thus upon credit, and a strong ambition was excited in her mind to justify the high opinion her superior friend had formed of her. She determined to become all that she was believed to be ; as the flame of a taper suddenly rises towards what is held over it, her spirit mounted to the point to which her friend pointed. CHAPTER V Helen's perfect happiness at Clarendon Park was not of long duration. People who have not been by nature blessed or cursed with nice feelings, or who have well rubbed off their delicacy in roughing through the world, can be quite happy, or at least happy enough, without ascertaining whether they are really esteemed or liked by those with whom they live. Many, and some of high degree, when well sheltered and fed, and provided with all the necessaries, and surrounded by all the luxuries of life, and with appearances tolerably well kept up by outward manner, care little or nought about the inside sentiments. But Helen was neither of the case-hardened philosophic nor the naturally obtuse-feeling class ; she belonged to the over- anxious. Surrounded at Clarendon Park with all the splendour of life, and with the immediate expectation of seeing and being seen by the first society in England ; with the certainty also of being tenderly loved and highly esteemed by two of the persons she was living with, yet a doubt about the third began to make her miserable. Whether General Clarendon really liked her or not, was a question that hung upon her mind sometimes as a dead weight ; then vibrating backwards and forwards, she often called to mind, and endeavoured to believe, what Cecilia the first day told her, that this reserved manner was natural to him with strangers, and would wear off. But to her the icy coldness did not thaw. So she felt, or so she fancied, and which it was she could not decide. She had 31 HELEN never before lived with any one about whose hking for her she could doubt, therefore, as she said to herself, ' I know I am a bad judge.' She feared to open her mind to Cecilia. Lady Davenant would be the safest person to consult ; yet Helen, with all her young delicacy fresh about her, scrupled, and could not screw her courage to the sticking-place. Every morning, going to Lady Davenant's room, she half resolved, and yet came away without speaking. At last, one morning, she began — ' You said something the other day, my dear Lady Davenant, about a visit from Miss Clarendon. Perhaps — I am afraid — ■ in short I think, — I fear, the General does not like my being here ; and I thought, perhaps, he was displeased at his sister's not being here, — that he thought Cecilia's having asked me prevented his sister's coming ; but then you told me he was not of a jealous temper, did not you ? ' ' Disttnguez,' said Lady Davenant ; ' distinguons, as the old French metaphysicians used to say, disiinguons, there be various kinds of jealousy, as of love. The old romancers make a distinction between amour and amour par amours. Whatever that mean, I beg leave to take a distinction full as in- telligible, I trust, he:ivi&&!\ jalousie par amour 3mA jalousie par amitid. Now, to apply ; when I told you that our General was not subject to jealousy, I should have distinguished, and said, jalousie par amoiir — jealousy in love, but I will not ensure him against jalousie par amitie — ^jealousy in friendship — of friends and relations, I mean. Methinks 1 have seen symptoms of this in the General : he does not like my influence over Cecilia, nor yours, my dear.' ' I understand it all,' exclaimed Helen, ' and I was right from the very first ; I saw he disliked me, and he ever will and must dislike and detest me — I see it in every look, hear it in every word, in every tone.' ' Now, my dear Helen, if you are riding off on your imagination, I wish you a pleasant ride, and till you come back again I will write my letter,' said Lady Davenant, taking up a pen. Helen begged pardon, and protested she was not going to ride off upon any imagination, — she had no imagination now — she entreated Lady Davenant to go on, for she was very anxious to know the whole truth, whatever it might be. Lady 32 HELEN Davenant laid down her pen, and told her all she knew. In the first place, that Cecilia did not like Miss Clarendon, who, though a very estimable person, had a sort of uncompromising sincerity, joined with a brusquerie of manner which Cecilia could not endure. How her daughter had managed matters to refuse the sister without offending the brother. Lady Dave- nant said she did not know ; that was Cecilia's secret, and probably it lay in her own charming manner of doing things, aided by the whole affair having occurred a few days before marriage, when nothing could be taken ill of the bride-elect. ' The General, as Cecilia told me, desired that she would write to invite you, Helen ; she did so, and I am very glad of it. This is all I know of this mighty matter.' But Helen could not endure the idea of being there, contrary to the General's wishes, in the place of the sister he loved. Oh, how very, very unfortunate she was to have all her hopes blighted, destroyed — and Cecilia's kindness all in vain. Dear, dear Cecilia ! — but for the whole world Helen would not be so selfish — she would not run the hazard of mak- ing mischief. She would never use her influence over Cecilia in opposition to the General. Oh, how little he knew of her character, if he thought it possible. Helen had now come to tears. Then the keen sense of injustice turned to indignation ; and the tears wiped away, and pride prevailing, colouring she exclaimed, ' That she knew what she ought to do, she knew what she would do — she would not stay where the master of the house did not wish for her. Orphan though she was, she could not accept of protection or obligation from any human being who neither liked nor esteemed her. She would shorten her visit at Clarendon Park — make it as short as his heart could desire — she would never be the cause of any disagreement — poor, dear, kind Cecilia ! She would write directly to Mrs. Colling- wood.' At the close of these last incoherent sentences, Helen was awestruck by the absolute composed immovability and silence of Lady Davenant. Helen stood rebuked before her. ' Instead of writing to Mrs. Collingwood, had not you better go at once ? ' said her ladyship, speaking in a voice so calm, and in a tone so slightly ironical, that it might have passed for earnest on any but an acutely-feeling ear — ' Shall I ring, and D 33 HELEN order your carriage ? ' putting her hand on the bell as she spoke, and resting it there, she continued — ' It would be so spirited to be off instantly ; so wise, so polite, so considerate towards dear Cecilia — so dignified towards the General, and so kind towards me, who am going to a far country, Helen, and may perhaps not see you ever again.' ' Forgive me ! ' cried Helen ; ' 1 never could go while you were here.' ' I did not know what you might think proper when you seemed to have lost your senses.' ' I have recovered them,' said Helen ; ' I will do whatever you please — whatever you think best.' ' It must not be what I please, my dear child, nor what I think best, but what you judge for yourself to be best ; else what will become of you when I am in Russia ? It must be some higher and more stable principle of action that must govern you. It must not be the mere wish to please this or that friend ; — the defect of your character, Helen, remember I tell you, is this — inordinate desire to be loved, this impatience of not being loved — that which but a moment ago made you ready to abandon two of the best friends you have upon earth, because you imagine, or you suspect, or you fear, that a third person, almost a stranger, does not like before he has had time to know you.' ' I was very foolish,' said Helen ; ' but now I will be wise, I will do whatever is — right. Surely you would not have me live here if I were convinced that the master of the house did not wish it ?' ' Certainly not — certainly not,' repeated Lady Davenant ; ' but let us see our way before us ; never gallop, my dear, much less leap ; never move, till you see your way ; — once it is ascertained that General Clarendon does not wish you to be here, nor approve of you for the chosen companion of his wife, I, as your best friend, would say, begone, and speed you on your way ; then as much pride, as much spirit, as you will ; but those who are conscious of possessing real spirit should never be — seldom are — in a hurry to show it ; that kind of ostentatious haste is undignified in man, and ungraceful in woman.' Helen promised that she would be patience itself ' But tell me exactly,' said she, ' what you would have me do.' 34 HELEN ' Nothing,' said Lady Davenant. ' Nothing ! that is easy at least,' said Helen, smiling. ' No, not so easy as you imagine ; it requires sometimes no small share of strength of mind.' ' Strength of mind ! ' said Helen, ' 1 am afraid I have not any.' ' Acquire it then, my dear,' said her friend. ' But can I .? ' ' Certainly ; strength of mind, like strength of body, is improved by exercise.' ' If I had any to begin with ' said Helen. ' You have some, Helen, a great deal in one particular, else why should I have any more regard for you, or more hope of you, than of any other well-dressed, well-taught beauty, any of the tribe of young ladies who pass before me without ever fixing my mind's eye for one moment ? ' ' But in what particular, my dear Lady Davenant, do you mean ? ' said Helen, anxiously ; ' I am afraid you are mistaken ; in what do you think I ever showed strength of mind ? Tell me, and I will tell you the truth.' ' That you will, and there is the point that I mean. Ever since I have known you, you have always, as at this moment, coward as you are, been brave enough to speak the truth ; and truth I believe to be the only real lasting foundation for friendship ; in all but truth there is a principle of decay and dissolution. Now good-bye, my dear ; — stay, one word more — there is a line in some classic poet, which says " the suspicion of ill-will never fails to produce it." — Remember this in your intercourse with General Clarendon ; show no suspicion of his bearing you ill-will, and to show none, you must feel none. Put absolutely out of your head all that you may have heard or imagined about Miss Clarendon, or her brother's prejudices on her account.' ' I will — I will indeed,' said Helen, and so they parted. A few words have sometimes a material influence on events in human life. Perhaps even among those who hold in general that advice never does good, there is no individual who cannot recollect some few words — some conversation which has altered the future colour of their lives. Helen's over-anxiety concerning General Clarendon's opinion of her being now balanced by the higher interest Lady Dave- 35 HELEN nant had excited, she met him with new-born courage ; and Lady CeciUa, not that she suspected it was necessary, but merely by way of prevention, threw in httle douceurs of flat- tery, on the General's part, repeated sundry pretty compliments, and really kind things which he had said to her of Helen. These always pleased Helen at the moment, but she could never make what she was told he said of her quite agree with what he said to her ; indeed, he said so very little, that no absolute discrepancy could be detected between the words spoken and the words reported to have been said ; but still the looks did not agree with the opinions or the cordiality implied. One morning Lady Cecilia told her that the General wished that she would ride out with them ; ' and you must come, indeed you must, and try his pretty Zelica ; he wishes it of all things, he told me so last night.' The General chancing to come in as she spoke, Lady Cecilia appealed to him with a look that almost called upon him to enforce her request ; but he only said that if Miss Stanley would do him the honour, he should certainly be happy, if Zelica would not be too much for her ; but he could not take it upon him to advise. Then looking for some paper of which he came in search, and passing her with the most polite and deferential manner possible, he left the room. Half vexed, half smiling, Helen looked at Cecilia, and asked whether all she had told her was not a little ^ plus belle que la vMtd.' Lady Cecilia, blushing slightly, poured out rapid protesta- tions that all she had ever repeated to Helen of the General's sayings was perfect truth — ' I will not swear to the words — because in the first place it is not pretty to swear, and next, because I can never recollect anybody's words, or my own, five minutes after they have been said.' Partly by playfulness, and partly by protestations. Lady Cecilia half convinced Helen ; but from this time she refrained from repeating compliments which, true or false, did no good, and things went on better ; observing this, she left them to their natural course, upon all such occasions the best way. And now visitors began to appear, and some officers of the General's staff arrived. Clarendon Park happened to be in the district which General Clarendon commanded, so that he was able usually to reside there. It was in what is called a 36 HELEN good neighbourhood, and there was much visiting, and many entertainments. One day at dinner, Helen was seated between the General and a fine young guardsman, who, as far as his deep sense of his own merit and his fashionable indifference to young ladies would permit, had made some demonstrations of a desire to attract her notice. He was piqued when, in the midst of some- thing he had wonderfully exerted himself to say, he observed that her attention was distracted by a gentleman opposite, who had just returned from the Continent, and who, among other pieces of news, marriages and deaths of English abroad, mentioned that ' poor D'Aubigny ' was at last dead. Helen looked first at Cecilia, who, as she saw, heard what was said with perfect composure ; and then at Lady Davenant, who had meantime glanced imperceptibly at her daughter, and then upon Helen, whose eyes she met — and Helen coloured merely from association, because she had coloured before — provoking ! yet impossible to help it. All passed in less time than it can be told, and Helen had left the guardsman in the midst of his sentence, discomfited, and his eyes were now upon her ; and in confusion she turned from him, and there were the General's eyes ; but he was only inviting her to taste some particular wine, which he thought she would like, and which she willingly accepted, and praised, though she assuredly did not know in the least what manner of taste it had. The General now exerted himself to occupy the gfuardsman in a con- versation about promotion, and drew all observation from Helen. Yet not the slightest indication of having seen, heard, or understood appeared in his countenance, not the least curiosity or interest about Colonel D'Aubigny. Of one point Helen was, however, intuitively certain, that he had noticed that con- fusion which he had so ably, so coolly covered. One ingenuous look from her thanked him, and his look in return was most gratifying ; she could not tell how it was, but it appeared more as if he understood and liked her than any look she had ever seen from him before. They were both more at their ease. Next day, he certainly justified all Cecilia's former assurances, by the urgency with which he desired to have her of the riding-party. He put her on horseback himself, bade the aide-de-camp ride on with Lady Cecilia — three several times set the bridle right in Miss Stanley's hand, assuring her 37 HELEN that she need not be afraid, that ZeUca was the gentlest creature possible, and he kept his fiery horse, Fleetfoot, to a pace that suited her during the whole time they were out. Helen took courage, and her ride did her a vast deal of good. The rides were repeated, the General evidently became more and more interested about Miss Stanley ; he appealed continu- ally to her taste, and marked that he considered her as part of his family; but, as Helen told Lady Davenant, it was difficult, with a person of his high-bred manners and reserved temper, to ascertain what was to be attributed to general defer- ence to her sex, what to particular regard for the individual, how much to hospitality to his guest, or attention to his wife's friend, and what might be considered as proof of his own desire to share that friendship, and of a real wish that she should continue to live with them. While she was in this uncertainty. Lord Davenant arrived from London ; he had always been fond of Helen, and now the first sight of her youthful figure in deep mourning, the recollection of the great changes that had taken place since they had last met, touched him to the heart — he folded her in his arms, and was unable to speak. He ! a great bulky man, with a face of constitutional joy — but so it was ; he had a tender heart, deep feelings of all kinds under an appearance of insouciance which deceived the world. He was distinguished as a political leader — but, as he said of himself, he had been three times inoculated with ambition — once by his mother, once by his brother, and once by his wife ; but it had never taken well ; the last the best, however, — it had shown at least sufficiently to satisfy his friends, and he was happy to be no more tormented. With talents of the first order, and integrity unblenching, his character was not of that stern stuff — no, not of that corrupt stuff — of which modern ambition should be made. He had now something to tell Helen, which he would say even before he opened his London budget of news. He told her, with a congratulatory smile, that he had had an oppor- tunity of showing his sense of Mr. CoUingwood's merits ; and as he spoke he put a letter into her hand. The letter was from her good friend Mr. Collingwood, accepting a bishopric in the West Indies, which had been offered to him by Lord Davenant. It enclosed a letter for 38 HELEN Helen, desiring in the most kind manner that she would let him know immediately and decidedly where and with whom she intended to live ; and there was a postscript from Mrs. CoUingwood full of affection, and doubts, and hopes, and fears. The moment Helen had finished this letter, without seeming to regard the inquiring looks of all present, and without once looking towards any one else, she walked deliberately up to General Clarendon, and begged to speak to him alone. Never was general more surprised, but of course he was too much of a general to let that appear. Without a word, he offered his arm, and led her to his study ; he drew a chair towards her — 'No misfortune, I hope. Miss Stanley? If I can in any way be of service ' ' The only service, General Clarendon,' said Helen, her manner becoming composed, and her voice steadying as she went on — 'the only service you can do me now is to tell me the plain truth, and this will prevent what would certainly be a misfortune to me — perhaps to all of us. Will you read this letter ? ' He received it with an air of great interest, and again moved the chair to her. Before she sat down, she added — ' I am unused to the world, you see. General Clarendon. I have been accustomed to live with one who always told me his mind sincerely, so that I could judge always what I ought to do. Will you do so now ? It is the greatest service, as well as favour, you can do me.' ' Depend upon it, I will,' said General Clarendon. ' I should not ask you to tell me in words — that might be painful to your politeness ; only let me see it,' said Helen, and she sat down. The General read on without speaking, till he came to the mention of Helen's original promise of living with the Colling- woods. He did not comprehend that passage, he said, showing it to her. He had always, on the contrary, understood that it had been a long settled thing, a promise between Miss Stanley and Lady Cecilia, that Helen should live with Lady Cecilia when she married. ' No such thing ! ' Helen said. ' No such agreement had ever been made.' So the General now perceived ; but this was a mistake of his which he hoped would make no difference in her arrange- 39 HELEN ments, he said : ' Why should it ? — unless Miss Stanley felt unhappy at Clarendon Park ? ' He paused, and Helen was silent ; then, taking desperate resolution, she answered — ' I should be perfectly happy here, if I were sure of your wishes, your feelings about me — about it.' ' Is it possible that there has been anything in my manner,' said he, ' that could give Miss Stanley pain ? What could have put a doubt into her mind ? ' ' There might be some other person nearer, and naturally dearer to you,' said Helen, looking up in his face ingenuously — ' one whom you might have desired to have in my place : — your sister. Miss Clarendon, in short.' ' Did Cecilia tell you of this 1 ' ' No, Lady Davenant did ; and since I heard it I never could be happy — I never can be iiappy till I know your feeling.' His manner instantly changed. ' You shall know my feelings, then,' said he. ' Till I knew you, Helen, my wish was that my sister should live with my wife ; now I know you, my wish is that you should live with us. You will suit Ceciha better than my sister could — will suit us both better, having the same truth of character, and more gentleness of manner. I have answered you with frank- ness equal to your own. And now,' said he, taking her hand, ' you know Cecilia has always considered you as her sister — allow me to do the same : consider me as a brother — such you shall find me. Thank you. This is settled for life,' added he, drawing her arm through his, and taking up her letters, he led her back towards the library. But her emotion, the stronger for being suppressed, was too great for reappearing in company : she withdrew her arm from his when they were passing through the hall, and turning her face away, she had just voice enough to beg he would show her letters to He understood. She ran upstairs to her own room, glad to be alone ; a flood of joy came over her. ' A brother in Cecilia's husband ! — a brother ! ' The word had a magical charm, and she could not help re- peating it aloud — she wept like a child. Lady Cecilia soon came flying in, all delight and affection, reproaches and wonder 40 f\ -^ I ' You know Cecilia has always considered you as her sisier^allow me to do the savie : consider 7ne as a brother* HELEN alternately, in the quickest conceivable succession. ' De- lighted it is settled and for ever ! my dear, dear Helen ! But how could you ever think of leaving us, you wicked Helen ! Well ! now you see what Clarendon really is ! But, my dear, I was so terrified when I heard it all. You are, and ever were, the oddest mixture of cowardice and courage. I — do you know I, brave / — never should have advised — never should have ventured as you have ? But he is delighted at it all, and so am I now it has all ended so charmingly, now I have you safe. I will write to the Collingwoods ; you shall not have a moment's pain ; I will settle it all, and invite them here before they leave England ; Clarendon desired I would — oh, he is ! — now you will believe me ! The Collingwoods, too, will be glad to be asked here to take leave of you, and all will be right ; I love, as you do, dear Helen, that everybody should be pleased when I am happy.' When Lady Davenant heard all that had passed, she did not express that prompt unmixed delight which Helen ex- pected : a cloud come over her brow, something painful re- garding her daughter seemed to strike her, for her eyes fixed on Cecilia, and her emotion was visible in her countenance ; but pleasure unmixed appeared as she turned to Helen, and to her she gave, what was unusual, unqualified approbation. ' My dear Helen, I admire your plain straightforward truth ; I am satisfied with this first essay of your strength of mind and courage.' ' Courage ! ' said Helen, smiling. ' Not such as is required to take a lion by the beard, or a bull by the horns,' replied Lady Davenant ; ' but there are many persons in this world who, brave though they be, would rather beard a lion, sooner seize a bull by the horns, than, when they get into a dilemma, dare to ask a direct question and tell plainly what passes in their own minds. Moral courage is, believe me, uncommon in both sexes, and yet in going through the world it is equally necessary to the virtue of both men and women.' ' But do you really think,' said Helen, ' that strength of mind, or what you call moral courage, is as necessary to women as it is to men ? ' ' Certainly, show me a virtue, male or female — if virtues admit of grammatical distinctions, if virtues acknowledge the 42 HELEN more worthy gender and the less worthy of the grammar, show me a virtue male or female that can long exist without truth. Even that emphatically termed the virtue of our sex, Helen, on which social happiness rests, society depends, on what is it based ? is it not on that single-hearted virtue truth ? — and truth on what ? on courage of the mind. They who dare to speak the truth will not ever dare to go irretrievably wrong. Then what is falsehood but cowardice ? — and a false woman ! — does not that say all in one word ? ' But whence arose all this ? you wonder, perhaps,' said Lady Davenant ; ' and I have not inclination to explain. Here comes Lord Davenant. Now for politics — farewell morality, a long farewell. Now for the London budget, and "what news from Constantinople? Grand Vizier certainly strangled, or not ? '" CHAPTER VI The London budget of news was now opened, and gone through by Lord Davenant, including quarrels in the Cabinet and all that with fear of change perplexes politicians. But the fears and hopes of different ages are attached to such different subjects, that Helen heard all' this as though she heard it not, and went on with her drawing, touching and retouching it, without ever looking up, till her attention was wakened by the name of Granville Beauclerc ; this was the name of the person who had written those interesting letters which she had met with in Lady Davenant's portfolio. ' What is he doing in town ? ' asked the General. ' Amusing himself, I suppose,' replied Lord Davenant. ' I believe he forgets that I am his guardian,' said the General. ' I am sure he cannot forget that you are his friend,' said Lady Cecilia ; 'for he has the best heart in the world.' ' And the worst head for anything useful,' said the General. ' He is a man of genius,' said Lady Davenant. ' Did you speak to him, my lord,' pursued the General, ' about standing for the county ? ' 43 HELEN ' Yes.' ' And he said what ? ' ' That he would have nothing to do with it.' ' Why ? ' ' Something about not being tied to party, and somewhat he said about patriotism,' replied Lord Davenant. ' Nonsense ! ' said the General, 'he is a fool.' ' Only young,' said Lady Davenant. ' Men are not so very young in these days at two-and- twenty,' said the General. 'In some,' said Lady Davenant, 'the classical touch, the romance of pohtical virtue, lasts for months, if not years, after they leave college ; even those who, like Granville, go into high life in London, do not sometimes, for a season or two, lose their first enthusiasm of patriotism.' The General's lips became compressed. Lord Davenant, throwing himself back in his easy-chair, repeated ' Patriotism ! yes, every young man of talent is apt to begin with a fit of that sort.' ' My dear lord,' cried Lady Davenant, ' you, of all men, to speak of patriotism as a disease ! ' ' And a disease that can be had but once in hfe, I am afraid,' replied her lord laughing ; ' and yet,' as if believing in that at which he laughed, ' it evaporates in most men in words, written or spoken, lasts till the first pamphlet is published, or till the maiden-speecfi in Parliament is fairly made, and fairly paid for — in all honour — all honourable men.' Lady Davenant passed over these satirical observations, and somewhat abruptly asked Lord Davenant if he recollected the late Mr. Windham. ' Certainly, he was not a man to be easily forgotten ; but what in particular ? ' ' The scales of his mind were too fine,' said Lady Davenant, ' too nicely adjusted for common purposes : diamond scales will not do for Aveighing wool. Very refined, very ingenious, very philosophical minds, such as Windham, Burke, Bacon, were all too scrupulous weighers ; their scales turned with the millionth of a grain, and all from the same cause, subject to the same defect, indecision. They saw too well how much can be said on both sides of the question. There is a sort of philosophical doubt, arising from enlargement of under- 44 HELEN standing, quite different from that irresolution of character which is caused by infirinity of will ; and I have observed,' continued Lady Davenant, ' in some of these over-scrupulous weighers, that when once they come to a balance, that instant they become most wilful ; so it will be, you will see, with Beauclerc. After excessive indecision, you will see him start perhaps at once to rash action.' ' Rash of wrong, resolute of right,' said Lord Davenant. ' He is constitutionally wilful, and metaphysically vacillating,' said Lady Davenant. The General waited till the metaphysics were over, and then said to Lord Davenant that he suspected there was something more than mere want of ambition in Beauclerc's refusal to go into Parliament. Some words were here inaudible to Helen, and the General began to walk up and down the room with so strong a tread, that at every step the china shook on the table near which Helen sat, so that she lost most part of what followed, and yet it seemed interesting, about some Lord Beltravers, and a Comtesse de Saint — something, or a Lady Blanche — somebody. Lady Davenant looked anxious, the General's steps became more deliberately, more ominously firm ; till Lady Cecilia came up to him, and playfully linking her arm in his, the steps were moderated, and when a soothing hand came upon his shoulder, the compressed lips were relaxed — she spoke in a low voice — he answered aloud. ' By all means ! write to him yourself, my love ; get him down here and he will be safe ; he cannot refuse you.' ' Tuesday, then ? ' she would name the earliest day if the General approved. He approved of everything she said : ' Tuesday let it be.' Following him to the door, Lady Ceciha added something which seemed to fill the measure of his contentment. ' Always good and kind,' said he ; 'so let it be.' ' Then shall I write to your sister, or will you ? ' 'You,' said the General ; 'let the kindness come from you, as it always does.' Lady Cecilia, in a moment at the writing-table, ran off, as fast as pen could go, two notes, which she put into her mother's hand, who gave an approving nod ; and, leaving them with her to seal and have franked, Cecilia darted out on the 45 HELEN terrace, carrying Helen along with her, to see some Italian garden she was projecting. And as she went, and as she stood directing the workmen, at every close of her directions she spoke to Helen. She said she was very glad that she had settled that Beauclerc was to come to them immediately. He was a great favourite of hers. ' Not for any of those grandissimo qualities which my mother sees in him, and which I am not quite clear exist ; but just because he is the most agreeable person in nature, and really natural ; though he is a man of the world, yet not the least affected. Quite fashionable, of course, but with true feeling. Oh! he is delightful, just ' then she interrupted herself to give directions to the workmen about her Italian garden — ' Oleander in the middle of that bed ; vases nearer to the balustrade ■ ' Beauclerc has a very good taste, and a beautiful place he has, Thorndale. He will be very rich. Few very rich young men are agreeable now, women spoil them so. — [" Border that bed with something pretty."] — Still he is, and I long to know what you will think of him ; I know what I think he will think, but, however, I will say no more ; people are always sure to get into scrapes in this world, when they say what they think. — [" That fountain looks beautiful."] — I forgot to tell you he is very handsome. The General is very fond of him, and he of the General, except when he considers him as his guardian, for Granville Beauclerc does not particularly like to be controlled — who does ? It is a' curious story. — [" Unpack those vases, and by the time that is done I will be back."] — Take a turn with me, Helen, this way. It is a curious story : Granville Beauclerc's father — but I don't know it perfectly, I only know that he was a very odd man, and left the General, though he was so much younger than himself, guardian to Granville, and settled that he was not to be of age, I mean not to come into possession of his large estates, till he is five-and-twenty : shockingly hard on poor Granville, and enough to make him hate Clarendon, but he does not, and that is charming, that is one reason I like him ! So amazingly respectful to his guardian always, considering how impetuous he is — amazingly respectful, though I cannot say 46 HELEN I think he is what the gardening books call ■patient of the knife — I don't think he likes his fancies to be lopped ; but then he is so clever. Much more what you would call a reading man than the General, distinguished at college, and all that which usually makes a young man conceited ; but Beauclerc is only a little headstrong — all the more agreeable, it keeps one in agitation ; one never knows how it will end, but I am sure it will all go on well now. It is curious, too, that mamma knew him also when he was at Eton, I believe — I don't know how, but long before we ever heard of Clarendon, and she corresponded with him, but I never knew him till he came to Florence, just after it was all settled with me and the General ; and he was with us there and at Paris, and travelled home with us, and I like him. Now you know all, except what I do not choose to tell you, so come back to the workmen. — " That vase will not do there, move it in front of these ever- greens ; that will do." ' Then returning to Helen — 'After all, I did so right, and I am so glad I thought in time of inviting Esther, now Mr. Beauclerc is coming — the General's sister — half-sister. Oh, so unhke him ! you would never guess that Miss Clarendon was his sister, except from her pride. But she is so different from other people ; she knows nothing, and wishes to know nothing, of the world. She lives always at an old castle in Wales, Llan — something, which she inherited from her mother, and she has always been her own mistress, living with her aunt in melancholy grandeur there, till her brother brought her to Florence, where — oh, how she was out of her element ! Come this way and I will tell you more. The fact is, I do not much like Miss Clarendon, and I will tell you why — I will describe her to you.' ' No, no, do not,' said Helen ; ' do not, my dear Cecilia, and I will tell you why.' ' Why — why ? ' cried Cecilia. ' Do you recollect the story my uncle told us about the young bride and her old friend, and the bit of advice ? ' No, Cecilia did not recollect anything of it. She should be very glad to hear the anecdote, but as to the advice, she hated advice. ' Still, if you knew who gave it — it was given by a very great man.' 47 HELEN ' A very great man ! now you make me curious. Well, what is it ? ' said Lady Cecilia. ' That for one year after her marriage she would not tell to her friends the opinion she had formed, if unfavourable, of any of her husband's relations, as it was probable she might change that opinion on knowing them better, and would after- wards be sorry for having told her first hasty judgment. Long afterwards the lady told her friend that she owed to this advice a great part of the happiness of her life, for she really had, in the course of the year, completely changed her first notions of some of her husband's family, and would have had sorely to repent if she had told her first thoughts.' Cecilia listened, and said it was all ' vastly well ! excellent. But I had nothing in the world to say of Miss Clarendon, but that she was too good — too sincere for the world we live in. For instance, at Paris, one day a charming Frenchwoman was telling some anecdote of the day in the most amusing manner. Esther Clarendon all the while stood by, grave and black as night, and at last turning upon our charmer at the end of the story, pronounced, " There is not one word of truth in all you have been saying ! " Conceive it, in full salon ! The French were in such amazement. " Inconceivable ! " as they might well say to me, as she walked off with her tragedy- queen air ; " Inconcevable — mats, vraimcnt inconcevable " ; and " Bien Anglaise" they would have added, no doubt, if I had not been by.' ' But there must surely have been some particular reason,' said Helen. < None in the world, only the story was not true, I believe. And then another time, when she was with her cousin, the Duchess of Lisle, at Lisle-Royal, and was to have gone out the next season in London with the Duchess, she came down one morning, just before they were to set off for town, and declared that she had heard such a quantity of scandal since she had been there, and such shocking things of London society, that she had resolved not to go out with the Duchess, and not to go to town at all ! So absurd — so prudish ! ' Helen felt some sympathy in this, and was going to have said so, but Cecilia went on with — ' And then to expect that Granville Beauclerc — should ' Here Cecilia paused, and Helen felt curious, and ashamed 48 HELEN of her curiosity ; she turned away, to raise the branches of some shrub, which were drooping from the weight of their flowers. ' I know something has been thought of,' said Cecilia. ' A match has been in contemplation — do you comprehend me, Helen ? ' ' You mean that Mr. Beauclerc is to marry Miss Clarendon,' said Helen, compelled to speak. ' I only say it has been thought of,' replied Lady Cecilia ; ' that is, as everything in this way is thought of about every couple not within the prohibited degrees, one's grandmother inclusive. And the plainer the woman, the more sure she is to contemplate such things for herself, lest no one else should think of them for her. But, my dear Helen, if you mean to ask ' ' Oh, I don't mean to ask anything,' cried Helen. ' But, whether you ask or not, I must tell you that the General is too proud to own, even to himself, that he could ever think of any man for his sister who had not first proposed for her.' There was a pause for some minutes. ' But,' resumed Lady Cecilia, ' I could not do less than ask her here for Clarendon's sake, when I know it pleases him ; and she is very — estimable, and so I wish to make her love me if I could I But I do not think she will be nearer her point with Mr. Beauclerc, if it is her point, by coming here just now. Granville has eyes as well as ears, and contrasts will strike. I know who I wish should strike him, as she strikes me — and I think — I hope ' Helen looked distressed. ' I am as innocent as a dove,' pursued Lady Cecilia ; ' but I suppose even doves may have their own private little thoughts and wishes.' Helen was sure Cecilia had meant all this most kindly, but she was sorry that some things had been said. She was con- scious of having been interested by those letters of Mr. Beau- clerc's ; but a particular thought had now been put into her mind, and she could never more say, never more feel, that such a thought had not come into her head. She was very sorry ; it seemed as if somewhat of the freshness, the innocence, of her mind was gone from her. She was sorry, too, that she E 49 HELEN had heard all that Cecilia had said about Miss Clarendon ; it appeared as if she was actually doomed to get into some diffi- culty with the General about his sister ; she felt as if thrown back into a sea of doubts, and she was not clear that she could, even by opposing, end them. On the appointed Tuesday, late, Miss Clarendon arrived ; a fine figure, but ungraceful, as Helen observed, from the first moment when she turned sharply away from Lady Cecilia's embrace to a great dog of her brother's — ' Ah, old Neptune ! I'm glad you're here still.' And when Lady Cecilia would have put down his paws — ' Let him alone, let him alone, dear, honest, old fellow.' ' But the dear, honest, old fellow's paws are wet, and will ruin your pretty new pelisse.' ' It may be new, but you know it is not pretty,' said Miss Clarendon, continuing to pat Neptune's head as he jumped up with his paws on her shoulders. ' Oh, my dear Esther, how can you bear him ? he is so rough in his love ! ' ' I like rough better than smooth.' The rough paw caught in her lace frill, and it was torn to pieces before ' down ! down ! ' and the united efforts of Lady Cecilia and Helen could extricate it. ' Don't distress yourselves about it, pray ; it does not signify in the least. Poor Neptune, how really sorry he looks — there, there, wag your tail again — no one shall come between us two old friends.' Her brother came in and, starting up, her arms were thrown round his neck, and her bonnet falling back, Helen, who had thought her quite plain before, was surprised to see that, now her colour was raised, and there was life in her eyes, she was really handsome. Gone again that expression when Cecilia spoke to her ; whatever she said. Miss Clarendon differed from ; if it was a matter of taste, she was always of the contrary opinion ; if narrative or assertion, she questioned, doubted, seemed as if she could not believe. Her conversation, if con\ersation it could be called, was a perpetual rebating and regrating, espe- cially with her sister-in-law ; if Lady Cecilia did but say there were three instead of four, it was taken up as ' quite a mistake,' and marked not only as a mistake, but as ' not true.' Every, the slightest error, became a crime against majesty, and the 5° HELEN first day ended with Helen's thinking her really the most dis- agreeable, intolerable person she had ever seen. And the second day went on a little worse. Helen thought Ceciha took too much pains to please, and said it would be better to let her quite alone. Helen did so completely, but Miss Clarendon did not let Helen alone ; but watched her with penetrating eyes continually, listened to every word she said, and seeming to weigh every syllable, — ' Oh, my words are not worth your weighing,' said Helen, laughing. ' Yes they are, to settle my mind.' The first thing that seemed at all to settle it was Helen's not agreeing with Cecilia about the colour of two ribands which Helen said she could not flatter her were good matches. The next was about a drawing of Miss Clarendon's, of Llansillan, her place in Wales ; a beautiful drawing indeed, which she had brought for her brother, but one of the towers certainly was out of the perpendicular. Helen was appealed to, and could not say it was upright ; Miss Clarendon instantly took up a knife, cut the paper at the back of the frame, and, taking out the drawing, set the tower to rights. 'There's the use of telling the truth.' ' Of listening to it,' said Helen. 'We shall get on, I see. Miss Stanley, if you can get over the first bitter outside of me — a hard outside, difficult to crack — stains delicate fingers, may be,' she continued, as she replaced her drawing in its frame — ' stains delicate fingers, may be, in the opening, but a good walnut you will find it, taken with a grain of salt.' Many a grain seemed necessary, and very strong nut- crackers in very strong hands. Lady Cecilia's evidently were not strong enough, though she strained hard. Helen did not feel inclined to try. Cecilia invited Miss Clarendon to walk out and see some of the alterations her brother had made. As they passed the new Italian garden, Miss Clarendon asked, ' What's all this ? — I don't like this— how I regret the Old English garden, and the high beech hedges. Everything is to be changed here, I suppose, — pray do not ask my opinion about any of the alterations.' ' I do not wonder,' said Cecilia, ' that you should prefer the old garden, with all your early associations ; warm-hearted, .■51 HELEN amiable people must always be so fond of what they have loved in childhood.' ' I never was here when I was a child, and I am not one of your amiable people.' ' Very true, indeed,' thought Helen. ' Miss Stanley looks at me as if I had seven heads,' said Miss Clarendon, laughing ; and, a minute after, overtaking Helen as she walked on, she looked full in her face, and added, ' Do acknowledge that you think me a savage.' Helen did not deny it, and from that moment Miss Clarendon looked less savagely upon her. She laughed and said, ' I am not quite such a bear as I seem, you'll find ; at least I never hug people to death. My growl is worse than my bite, unless some one should flatter my classical, bearish passion, and offer to feed me with honey, and when I find it all comb and no honey, who would not growl then ? ' Lady Cecilia now came up, and pointed out views to which the General had opened. 'Yes, it's well, he has done very well, but pray don't stand on ceremony with me. I can walk alone, you may leave me to my own cogitations, as I like best.' ' Surely, as you like best,' said Lady Cecilia ; ' pray consider yourself, as you know you are, at home here.' ' No, I never shall be at home here,' said Esther. ' Oh ! don't say that, let me hope — let me hope ' and she withdrew. Helen just stayed to unlock a gate for Miss Clarendon's ' rambles further,' and, as she unlocked it, she heard Miss Clarendon sigh as she repeated the word, ' Hope, I do not like to hope, hope has so often deceived me.' ' You will never be deceived in Cecilia,' said Helen. ' Take care — stay till you try.' ' I have tried,' said Helen, ' I know her.' ' How long ? ' ' From childhood ! ' ' You're scarcely out of childhood yet.' ' I am not so very young. I have had trials of my friends — of Cecilia particularly, much more than you could ever have had.' ' Well, this is the best thing I ever heard of her, and from good authority too ; her friends abroad were all false,' said Miss Clarendon. 52 HELEN ' It is very extraordinary,' said Helen, ' to hear such a young person as you are talk so ' ' So — how ? ' ' Of false friends — you must have been very unfortunate.' 'Pardon me — very fortunate — to find them out in time.' She looked at the prospect, and liked all that her brother was doing, and disliked all that she even guessed Lady Cecilia had done. Helen showed her that she guessed wrong here and there, and smiled at her prejudices ; and Miss Clarendon smiled again, and admitted that she was prejudiced, ' but every- body is ; only some show and tell, and others smile and fib. I wish that word fib was banished from the English language, and white lie drummed out after it. Things by their right names and we should all do much better. Truth must be told, whether agreeable or not.' ' But whoever makes truth disagreeable commits high treason against virtue,' said Helen. ' Is that yours ? ' cried Miss Clarendon, stopping short. 'No,' said Helen. ' It is excellent whoever said it.' ' It was fi-om my uncle Stanley I heard it,' said Helen. ' Superior man that uncle must have been.' ' I will leave you now,' said Helen. ' Do ; I see we shall like one another in time, Miss Stanley ; in time, — I hate sudden friendships.' That evening Miss Clarendon questioned Helen more about her friendship with Cecilia, and how it was she came to live with her. Helen plainly told her. ' Then it was not an original promise between you ? ' ' Not at all,' said Helen. ' Lady Cecilia told me it was. Just like her, — I knew all the time it was a lie.' Shocked and startled at the word, and at the idea, Helen exclaimed, ' Oh, Miss Clarendon, how can you say so ? any- body may be mistaken. Cecilia mistook ' Lady Cecilia joined them at this moment. Miss Clarendon's face was flushed. ' This room is insufferably hot. What can be the use of a fire at this time of year ? ' Cecilia said it was for her mother, who was apt to be chilly in the evenings ; and as she spoke, she put a screen between the flushed cheek and the fire. Miss Clarendon pushed it S3 HELEN away, saying, ' I can't talk, I can't hear, I can't understand with a screen before me. What did you say, Lady Ceciha, to Lady Davenant, as we came out from dinner, about Mr. Beauclerc ? ' ' That we expect him to-morrow.' ' You did not tell me so when you wrote.' ' No, my dear.' ' Why, pray ? ' ' I don't know.' ' You don't know. Lady Cecilia ! why should people say they do not know, when they do know perfectly well ? ' ' If I had thought it was of any consequence to you, Esther,' said Cecilia, with an arch look. ' Now you expect me to answer that it was not of tlie least consequence to me — that is the answer you would make ; but my answer is, that it was of consequence to me, and you knew it was.' ' And if I did ? ' ' If you did, why say " If I had thought it of any conse- quence to you ? " — why say so ? answer me truly.' ' Answer me truly ! ' repeated Lady Cecilia, laughing. ' Oh, my dear Esther, we are not in a court of justice.' ' Nor in a court of honour,' pursued Miss Clarendon. ' Well, well ! let it be a court of love at least,' said Lady Cecilia. ' What a pretty proverb that was, Helen, that we met with the other day in that book of old English proverbs — " Love rules his kingdom without a sword." ' ' Very likely ; but to the point,' said Miss Clarendon, ' when do you expect Mr. Beauclerc ? ' ' To-morrow.' ' Then I shall go to-morrow.' ' My dear Esther, why ? ' ' You know why ; you know what reports have been spread ; it suits neither my character nor my brother's to give any foundation for such reports. Let me ring the bell, and I will give my own orders.' ' My dear Esther, but your brother will be so vexed — so surprised.' ' My brother is the best judge of his own conduct, he will do what he pleases, or what you please. I am the judge of mine, and certainly shall do what I think right.' 54 HELEN She rang accordingly, and ordered that her carriage should be at the door at six o'clock in the morning. ' Nay, my dear Esther,' persisted Cecilia, ' I wish you would not decide so suddenly ; we were so glad to have you come to us ' ' Glad ! why, you know ' ' I know,' interrupted Lady Cecilia, colouring, and she began as fast as possible to urge every argument she could think of to persuade Miss Clarendon : but no arguments, no entreaties of hers or the General's, public or private, were of any avail, — go she would, and go she did, at six o'clock. ' I suppose,' said Helen to Lady Davenant, ' that Miss Clarendon is very estimable, and she seems to be very clever ; but I wonder that with all her abilities she does not learn to make her manners more agreeable.' ' My dear,' said Lady Davenant, ' we must take people as they are ; you may graft a rose upon an oak, but those who have tried the experiment tell us the graft will last but a short time, and the operation ends in the destruction of both ; where the stocks have no common nature, there is ever a want of conformity which sooner or later proves fatal to both.' But Beauclerc, what was become of him ? — that d3.y passed, and no Beauclerc ; another and another came, and on the third day, only a letter from him, which ought to have come on Tuesday. — But ' iao iaie,' the shameful brand of procras- tination, was upon it — and it contained only a few lines blotted in the folding, to say that he could not possibly be at Clarendon Park on Tuesday, but would on Wednesday or Thursday if possible. Good-natured Lord Davenant observed, 'When a young man in London, writing to his friends in the country, names two days for leaving town, and adds an " if possible" his friends should never expect him till the last of the two named.' The last of the two days arrived — Thursday. The aide- de-camp asked if Mr. Beauclerc was expected to-day. ' Yes, I expect to see him to-day,' the General answered. ' I hope, but do not expect,' said Lady Davenant, ' for, as learned authority tells me, " to-'>expect is to hope with some degree of certainty " ' The General left the room repeating, ' I expect him to-day, Ceciha.' 55 HELEN The day passed, however, and he came not — the night came. The General ordered that the gate should be kept open, and that a servant should sit up. The servant sat up all night, cursing Mr. Beauclerc. And in the morning he replied with maUcious alacrity to the first question his master asked, ' No, sir, Mr. Beauclerc is not come.' At breakfast, the General, after buttering his bread in silence for some minutes, confessed that he loved punctuality. It might be a military prejudice, — it might be too professional, martinet perhaps, — but still he owned he did love punctuality. He considered it as a part of politeness, a proper attention to the convenience and feelings of others ; indispensable between strangers it is usually felt to be, and he did not know why intimate friends should deem themselves privileged to dispense with it. His eyes met Helen's as he finished these words, and smiling, he complimented her upon her constant punctuality. It was a voluntary grace in a lady, but an imperative duty in a man — and a young man. ' You are fond of this young man, I see. General,' said Lord Davenant. ' But not of his fault' Lady Cecilia said something about forgiving a first fault. ' Never ! ' said Lady Davenant. ' Lord Collingwood's rule was — never forgive a first fault, and you will not have a second. You love Beauclerc, I see, as Lord Davenant says.' ' Love him ! ' resumed the General ; ' with all his faults and folHes, I love him as if he were my brother.' At which words Lady Cecilia, with a scarcely perceptible smile, cast a furtive glance at Helen. The General called for his horses, and, followed by his aide- de-camp, departed, saying that he should be back at luncheon- time, when he hoped to find Beauclerc. In the same hope. Lady Davenant ordered her pony-phaeton earlier than usual ; Lady Cecilia further hoped most earnestly that Beauclerc would come this day, for the next the house would be full of company, and she really wished to have him one day at least to themselves, and she gave a most significant glance at Helen. ' The first move often secures the game against the best players,' said she. Helen blushed, because she could not help understanding ; 56 HELEN she was ashamed, vexed with Ceciha, yet pleased by her kind- ness, and half amused by her arch look and tone. They were neither of them aware that Lady Davenant had heard the words that passed, or seen the looks ; but imme- diately afterwards, when they were leaving the breakfast-room. Lady Davenant came between the two friends, laid her hand upon her daughter's arm, and said, ' Before you make any move in a dangerous game, listen to the voice of old experience.' Lady Cecilia, startled, looked up, but as if she did not comprehend. ' Cupid's bow, my dear,' continued her mother, ' is, as the Asiatics tell us, strung with bees, which are apt to sting — sometimes fatally — those who meddle with it.' Lady Cecilia still looked with an innocent air, and still as if she could not comprehend. ' To speak more plainly, then, Cecilia,' said her mother, ' build no matrimonial castles in the air ; standing or falling they do mischief — mischief either to the builder, or to those for whom they may be built.' 'Certainly if they fall they disappoint one,' said Lady Cecilia, ' but if they stand ? ' Seeing that she made no impression on her daughter. Lady Davenant turned to Helen, and gravely said, ' My dear Helen, do not let my daughter inspire you with false, and perhaps vain imaginations, ceitainly premature, therefore unbecoming.' Helen shrank back, yet instantly looked up, and her look was ingenuously grateful. ' But, mamma,' said Lady Cecilia, ' I declare I do not understand what all this is about.' ' About Mr. Granville Beauclerc,' said her mother. ' How can you, dear mamma, pronounce his name so tout au longf ' Pardon my indelicacy, my dear ; delicacy is a good thing, but truth a better. I have seen the happiness of many young women sacrificed by such false delicacy, and by the fear of giving a moment's present pain, which it is sometimes the duty of a true friend to give.' ' Certainly, certainly, mamma, only not necessary now ; and I am so sorry you have said all this to poor dear Helen.' 57 HELEN ' If you have said nothing to her, Cecilia, I acknowledge 1 have said too much.' ' I said — I did nothing,' cried Lady Cecilia ; ' I built no castles — never built a regular castle in my life ; never had a regular plan in my existence ; never mentioned his name, except about another person ' An appealing look to Helen was however protested. 'To the best of my recollection, at least,' Lady Cecilia immediately added. ' Helen seems to be blushing for your want of recollection, Cecilia.' ' I am sure I do not know why you blush, Helen. I am certain I never did say a word distinctly.' ' Not disti7ictly certainly,' said Helen in a low voice. ' It was my fault if I understood ' ' Always true, you are,' said Lady Davenant. ' I protest I said nothing but the truth,' cried Lady Cecilia hastily. ' But not the whole truth, Cecilia,' said her mother. ' I did, upon my word, mamma,' persisted Lady Cecilia, repeating ' upon my word.' ' Upon your word, Cecilia ! that is either a vulgar expletive or a most serious asseveration.' She spoke with a grave tone, and with her severe look, and Helen dared not raise her eyes ; Lady Cecilia now coloured deeply. ' Shame ! Nature's hasty conscience,' said Lady Davenant. ' Heaven preserve it ! ' ' Oh, mother ! ' cried Lady Cecilia, laying her hand on her mother's, ' surely you do not think seriously — surely you are not angry — I cannot bear to see you displeased,' said she, looking up imploringly in her mother's face, and softly, urgently pressing her hand. No pressure was returned ; that hand was slowly and with austere composure withdrawn, and her mother walked away down the corridor to her own room. Lady CeciUa stood still, and the tears came into her eyes. ' My dear friend, I am exceedingly sorry,' said Helen. She could not believe that Cecilia meant to say what was not true, yet she felt that she had been to blame in not telling all, and her mother in saying too much. Lady Cecilia, her tears dispersed, stood looking at the 58 HELEN impression which her mother's signet-ring had left in the palm of her hand. It was at that moment a disagreeable recollec- tion that the motto of that ring was 'Truth.' Rubbing the impress from her hand, she said, half speaking to herself, and half to Helen — ' I am sure I did not mean anything wrong ; and I am sure nothing can be more true than that I never formed a regular plan in my life. After all, I am sure that so much has been said about nothing, that I do not understand anything : I never do, when mamma goes on in that way, making mountains of molehills, which she always does with me, and did ever since I was a child ; but she really forgets that I am not a child. Now, it is well the General was not by ; he would never have borne to see his wife so treated. But I would not, for the world, be the cause of any disagree- ment. O Helen, my mother does not know how I love her, let her be ever so severe to me ! But she never loved me ; she cannot help it. I believe she does her best to love me — my poor, dear mother ! ' Helen seized this opportunity to repeat the warm expressions she had heard so lately from Lady Davenant, and melting they sank into Cecilia's heart. She kissed Helen again and again, for a dear, good peacemaker, as she always was — and ' I'm resolved ' — but in the midst of her good resolves she caught a glimpse, through the glass door opening on the park, of the General, and a fine horse they were ringing, and she hurried out ; all light of heart she went, as though Her treading would not bend a blade of grass, Or shake the downy blowball from her stalk. CHAPTER VII Since Lord Davenant's arrival. Lady Davenant's time was so much taken up with him, that Helen could not have many opportunities of conversing with her, and she was the more anxious to seize every one that occurred. She always watched for the time when Lady Davenant went out in her pony phaeton, for then she had her delightfully to herself, the carriage holding only two. 59 HELEN It was at the door, and Lady Davenant was crossing the hall followed by Helen, when Cecilia came in with a look, unusual in her, of being much discomfited. ' Another put-off from Mr. Beauclerc ! He will not be here to-day. I give him up.' Lady Davenant stopped short, and asked whether Cecilia had told him that probably she should soon be gone ? ' To be sure I did, mamma.' ' And what reason does he give for his delay ? ' ' None, mamma, none — not the least apology. He says, very cavalierly indeed, that he is the worst man in the world at making excuses— shall attempt none.' ' There he is right,' said Lady Davenant. ' Those who are good at excuses, as Franklin justly observed, are apt to be good for nothing else.' ' The General came up the steps at this moment, rolling a note between his fingers, and looking displeased. Lady Davenant inquired if he could tell her the cause of Mr. Beauclerc's delay. He could not. Lady Cecilia exclaimed — ' Very extraordinary ! Provoking ! Insufferable ! Intolerable ! ' ' It is Mr. Beauclerc's own affair,' said Lady Davenant, wrapping her shawl round her ; and, taking the General's arm, she walked on to her carriage. Seating herself, and gathering up the reins, she repeated — 'Mr. Beauclerc's own affair, completely.' The lash of her whip was caught somewhere, and, while the groom was disentangling it, she reiterated ' That will do ; let the horses go ' ; and with half-suppressed impatience thanked Helen, who was endeavouring' to arrange some ill-disposed cloak — ' Thank you, thank you, my dear ; it's all very well. Sit down, Helen.' She drove off rapidly, through the beautiful park scenery. But the ancient oaks, standing alone, casting vast shadows, the distant massive woods of magnificent extent and of soft and varied foliage, the secluded glades, all were lost upon her. Looking straight between her horses' ears, she drove on in absolute silence. Helen's idea of Mr. Beauclerc's importance increased wonderfully. What must he be whose coming or not coming could so move all the world, or those who were all the world 60 HELEN to her ? And, left to her own cogitations, she was picturing to herself what manner of man he might be, when suddenly Lady Davenant turned, and asked what she was thinking of ? ' I beg your pardon for startling you so, my dear ; I am aware that it is a dreadfully imprudent, impertinent question — one which, indeed, I seldom ask. Few interest me sufficiently to make me care of what they think : from fewer still could I expect to hear the truth. Nay — nothing upon compulsion, Helen. Only say plainly, if you would rather not tell me. That answer I should prefer to the ingenious formula of evasion, the solecism in metaphysics, which Cecilia used the other day, when unwittingly I asked her of what she was thinking — " Of a great many different things, mamma." ' Helen, still more alarmed by Lady Davenant's speech than by her question, and aware of the conclusions which might be drawn from her answer, nevertheless bravely replied that she had been thinking of Mr. Beauclerc, of what he might be whose coming or not coming was of such consequence. As she spoke, the expression of Lady Davenant's countenance changed. ' Thank you, my dear child, you are truth itself, and truly do I love you therefore. It's well that you did not ask me of what I was thinking, for I am not sure that I could have answered so directly.' ' But I could never have presumed to ask such a question of you,' said Helen, ' there is such a difference.' ' Yes,' replied Lady Davenant ; ' there is such a difference as age and authority require to be made, but nevertheless, such as is not quite consistent with the equal rights of friendship. You have told me the subject of your day-dream, my love, and if you please, I will tell you the subject of mine. I was rapt into times long past : I was living over again some early scenes — some which are connected, and which connect me, in a curious manner, with this young man, Mr. Granville Beauclerc' She seemed to speak with some difficulty, and yet to be resolved to go on. ' Helen, I have a mind,' continued she, ' to tell you what, in the language of affected autobiographers, I might call " some passages of my life." ' Helen's eyes brightened, as she eagerly thanked her : but hearing a half-suppressed sigh, she added — ' Not if it is pain- ful to you though, my dear Lady Davenant.' 6i HELEN ' Painful it must be,' she replied, ' but it may be useful to you ; and a weak friend is that who can do only what is pleasurable. You have often trusted me with those little inmost feelings of the heart, which, however innocent, we shrink from exposing to any but the friends we most love ; it is unjust and absurd of those advancing in years to expect of the young that confidence should come all and only on their side : the human heart, at whatever age, opens only to the heart that opens in return.' Lady Davenant paused again, and then said, 'It is a general opinion that nobody is the better for advice.' ' I am sure I do not think so,' said Helen. ' I am glad you do not ; nor do L Much depends upon the way in which it is offered. General maxims, dra\vn from experience, are, to the young at least, but as remarks — moral sentences — mere, dead letter, and take no hold of the mind. " I have felt " must come before " I think," especially in speak- ing to a young friend ; and, though I am accused of being so fond of generalising that I never come to particulars, I can and will : therefore, my dear, I will tell you some particulars of my life, in which, take notice, there are no adventures. Mine has been a hfe of passion — of feeling, at least, — not of incidents : nothing, my dear, to excite or to gratify curiosity.' ' But, independent of all curiosity about events,' said Helen, ' there is such an interest in knowing what has been really felt and thought in their former lives by those we know and love.' ' I shall sink in your esteem,' said Lady Davenant — ' so be it. ' I need not begin, as most people do, with " I was born " ' but, interrupting herself, she said, ' this heat is too much for me.' They turned into a long shady drive through the woods. Lady Davenant drew up the reins, and her ponies walked slowly on the grassy road; then, turning to Helen, she said, — ' It would have been well for me if any friend had, when I was of your age, put me on my guard against my own heart : but my too indulgent, too sanguine mother led me into the very danger against which she should have warned me she misled me, though without being aware of it. Our minds, our very natures, differed strangely. 62 HELEN ' She was a castle-builder — yes, now you know, my dear, why I spoke so strongly, and, as you thought, so severely, this morning. My mother was a castle-builder of the ordinary sort : a worldly plan of a castle was hers, and little care had she about the knight within ; yet she had sufficient tact to know that it must be the idea of the preux chevalier that would lure her daughter into the castle. Prudent for herself, imprudent for me, and yet she loved me — all she did was for love of me. She managed with so much address, that I had no suspicion of my being the subject of any speculation — other- wise, probably, my imagination might have revolted, my self- will have struggled, my pride have interfered, or my delicacy might have been alarmed, but nothing of all that happened ; I was only too ready, too glad, to believe all that I was told, all that appeared in that spring-time of hope and love. I was very romantic, not in the modern fashionable young-lady sense of the word, with the mixed ideas of a shepherdess's hat and the paraphernalia of a peeress — love in a cottage, and a fashionable house in town. No ; mine was honest, pure, real romantic love — ^ absurd if you will; it was love nursed by imagination more than by hope. I had early, in my secret soul, as perhaps you have at this instant in yours, a pattern of perfection — something chivalrous, noble, something that is no longer to be seen nowadays — the more delightful to imagine, the moral sublime and beautiful ; more than human, yet with the extreme of human tenderness. Mine was to be a demigod whom I could worship, a husband to whom I could always look up, with whom I could always sympathise, and to whom I could devote myself with all a woman's self-devotion. I had then a vast idea— as I think you have now, Helen — of self- devotion ; you would devote yourself to your friends, but I could not shape any of my friends into a fit object. So after my own imagination I made one, dwelt upon it, doated on it, and at last threw this bright image of my own fancy full upon the being to whom I thought I was most happily destined — destined by duty, chosen by affection. The words ' I love you ' once pronounced, I gave my whole heart in return, gave it, sanctified, as I felt, by religion. I had high religious sentiments ; a vow once past the lips, a look, a single look of appeal to Heaven, was as much for me as if pronounced at the altar, and before thousands to witness. Some time was to 63 HELEN elapse before the celebration of our marriage. Protracted engagements are unwise, yet I should not say so ; this gave me time to open my eyes — my bewitched eyes : still, some months I passed in a trance of beatification, with visions of duties all performed — benevolence universal, and gratitude, and high success, and crowns of laurel, for my hero, for he was military ; it all joined well in my fancy. All the pictured tales of vast heroic deeds were to be his. Living, I was to live in the radiance of his honour ; or dying, to die with him, and then to be most blessed. ' It is all to me now as a dream, long past, and never told ; no, never, except to him who had a right to know it — my husband, and now to you, Helen. From my dream I was awakened by a rude shock — I saw, I thank Heaven I first, and I alone, saw that his heart was gone from me — that his heart had never been mine — that it was unworthy of me. No, I will not say that ; I will not think so. Still I trust he had deceived himself, though not so much as he deceived me. I am willing to believe he did not know that what he professed for me was not love till he was seized by that passion for another, a younger, fairer Oh ! how much fairer. Beauty is a great gift of Heaven — not for the purposes of female vanity ; but a great gift for one who loves, and wishes to be loved. But beauty I had not.' ' Had not ! ' interrupted Helen, ' I always heard ' ' He did not think so, my dear ; no matter what others thought, at least so I felt at that time. My identity is so much changed that I can look back upon this now, and tell it all to you calmly. ' It was at a rehearsal of ancient music ; I went there accidentally one morning without my mother, with a certain old duchess and her daughters ; the dowager full of some Indian screen which she was going to buy ; the daughters, intent, one of them, on a quarrel between two of the singers ; the other upon loves and hates of her own. I was the only one of the party who had any real taste for music. I was then particularly fond of it. 'Well, my dear, I must come to the point,' her \'oice changing as she spoke. — ' After such a lapse of time, during which my mind, my whole self, has so changed, I could not have believed before I began to speak on this subject that 64 HELEN these reminiscences could have so moved me ; but it is merely this sudden wakening of ideas long dormant, for years not called up, never put into words. ' I was sitting, rapt in a silent ecstasy of pleasure, leaning back behind the whispering party, when I saw him come in, and, thinking only of his sharing my delight, I made an effort to catch his attention, but he did not see me — his eye was fixed on another ; I followed that eye, and saw that most beautiful creature on which it fixed ; I saw him seat himself beside her — one look was enough — it was conviction. A pang went through me ; I grew cold, but made no sound nor motion ; I gasped for breath, I believe, but I did not faint. None cared for me ; I was unnoticed — saved from the abase- ment of pity. I struggled to retain my self-command, and was enabled to complete the purpose on which I then, even then, resolved. That resolve gave me force. < In any great emotion we can speak better to those who do not care for us than to those who feel for us. More calmly than I now speak to you, I turned to the person who then sat beside me, to the dowager whose heart was in the Indian screen, and begged that I might not longer detain her, as I wished that she would carry me home — she readily complied : I had presence of mind enough to move when we could do so without attracting attention. It was well that woman talked as she did all the way home : she never saw, never suspected, the agony of her to whom she spoke. I ran up to my own room, bolted the door, and threw myself into a chair ; that is the last thing I remember, till I found myself lying on the floor, wakening from a state of insensibihty. I know not what time had elapsed : so as soon as I could I rang for my maid ; she had knocked at my door, and, supposing I slept, had not disturbed me — my mother, I found, had not yet returned. ' I dressed for dinner ; he was to dine with us. It was my custom to see him for a few minutes before the rest of the company arrived. No time ever appeared to me so dreadfully long as the interval between my being dressed that day and his arrival. ' I heard him coming upstairs : my heart beat so violently that I feared I should not be able to speak with dignity and composure, but the motive was sufficient. ' What I said I know not ; I am certain only that it was F 65 HELEN without one word of reproach. What I had at one glance foreboded was true — he acknowledged it. I released him from all engagement to me. I saw he was evidently relieved by the determined tone of my refusal — at what expense to my heart he was set free, he saw not — never knew — never suspected. But after that first involuntary expression of the pleasure of relief, I saw in his countenance surprise, a sort of mortified astonishment at my self-possession. I own my woman's pride enjoyed this ; it was something better than pride — the sense of the preservation of my dignity. I felt that in this shipwreck of my happiness I made no cowardly exposure of my feelings, but he did not understand me. Our minds, as I now found, moved in different orbits. We could not comprehend each other. Instead of feeling, as the instinct of generosity would have taught him to feel, that I was sacrificing my happiness to his, he told me that he now believed I had never loved him. My eyes were opened — I saw him at once as he really was. The ungenerous look upon self-devotion as madness, folly, or art : he could not think me a fool, he did not think me mad, artful I believe he did suspect me to be ; he concluded that I made the discovery of his inconstancy an excuse for my own ; he thought me, perhaps, worse than capricious, interested — for, our engagement being unknown, a lover of higher rank had, in the interval, presented himself My perception of this base suspicion was useful to me at the moment, as it roused my spirit, and I went through the better, and without relapse of tenderness, with that which I had undertaken. One condition only I made ; I insisted that this explanation should rest between us two ; that, in fact, and in manner, the breaking off the match should be left entirely to me. And to this part of the business I now look back with satisfaction, and I have honest pride in telling you, who will feel the same for me, that I practised in the whole conduct of the affair no deceit of any kind, not one falsehood was told. The world knew nothing ; there my mother had been prudent. She was the only person to whom 1 was bound to explain — to speak, I mean, for I did not feel myself bound to explain. Perfect confidence only can command perfect confidence in whatever relation of life. I told her all that she had a right to know. I announced to her that the intended marriage could never be — that I objected to it ; that both our minds were changed ; that we were both 66 / released him from all engagement to me. HELEN satisfied in having released each other from our mutual engage- ment. I had, as I foresaw, to endure my mother's anger, her entreaties, her endless surprise, her bitter disappointment ; but she exhausted all these, and her mind turned sooner than I had expected to that hope of higher establishment which amused her during the rest of the season in London. Two months of it were still to be passed — to me the two most painful months of my existence. The daily, nightly, effort of appearing in public, while I was thus wretched, in the full gala of life in the midst of the young, the gay, the happy — broken- hearted as I felt — it was an effort beyond my strength. That summer was, I remember, intolerably hot. Whenever my mother observed that I looked pale, and that my spirits were not so good as formerly, I exerted myself more and more ; accepted every invitation because I dared not refuse ; I danced at this ball, and the next, and the next ; urged on, I finished to the dregs the dissipation of the season. ' My mother certainly made me do dreadfully too much. But I blame others, as we usually do when we are ourselves the most to blame — I had attempted that which could not be done. By suppressing all outward sign of suffering, allowing no vent for sorrow in words or tears — by actual force of com- pression — I thought at once to extinguish my feelings. Little did I know of the human heart when I thought this ! The weak are wise in yielding to the first shock. They cannot be struck to the earth who sink prostrate ; sorrow has little power where there is no resistance. — "The flesh will follow where the pincers tear." Mine was a presumptuous — it had nearly been a fatal struggle. That London season at last over, we got into the country ; I expected rest, but found none. The pressing necessity for exertion over, the stimulus ceasing, I sank — sank into a state of apathy. ' Time enough had elapsed between the breaking off of my marriage and the appearance of this illness to prevent any ideas on my mother's part of cause and effect, ideas indeed which were never much looked for, or well joined in her mind. The world knew nothing of the matter. My illness went under the convenient head " nervous." I heard all the opinions pronounced on my case, and knew they were all mistaken, but I swallowed whatever they pleased. No physician, I repeated to myself, can "minister to a mind diseased." 68 HELEN ' I tried to call religion to my aid ; but my religious senti- ments were at that time tinctured with the enthusiasm of my early character. Had I been a Catholic, I should have escaped from my friends and thrown myself into a cloister ; as it was, I had formed a strong wish to retire from that world which was no longer anything to me : the spring of passion, which I then thought the spring of life, being broken, I meditated my resolution secretly and perpetually as I lay on my bed. They used to read to me, and, among other things some papers of The Ratnbler, which I liked not at all ; its tripod sentences tired my ear, but I let them go on — as well one sound as another. ' It chanced that one night, as I was going to sleep, an eastern story in The Rambler was read to me, about some man, aweary of the world, who took to the peaceful her- mitage. There was a regular moral tagged to the end of it, a thing I hate ; the words were, "No life pleasing to God that is not useful to man." When I wakened in the middle of that night, this sentence was before my eyes, and the words seemed to repeat themselves over and over again to my ears when I was sinking to sleep. The impression remained in my mind, and though I never voluntarily recurred to it, came out long afterwards, perfectly fresh, and became a motive of action. ' Strange, mysterious connection between mind and body ; in mere animal nature we see the same. The bird wakened from his sleep to be taught a tune sung to him in the dark, and left to sleep again, — the impression rests buried within him, and weeks afterward he comes out with the tune perfect. But these are only phenomena of memory — mine was more extraordinary. I am not sure that I can explain it to you. In my weak state, my understanding enfeebled as much as my body — my reason weaker than my memory, I could not help allowing myself to think that the constant repetition of that sentence was a warning sent to me from above. As I grew stronger, the superstition died away, but the sense of the thing still remained with me. It led me to examine and reflect. It did more than all my mother's entreaties could effect. I had refused to see any human creature, but I now consented to admit a few. The charm was broken. I gave up my longing for solitude, my plan of retreat from the world ; suffered myself 69 HELEN to be carried where they pleased — to Brighton it was — to my mother's satisfaction. I was ready to appear in the ranks of fashion at the opening of the next London campaign. Auto- matically I "ran my female exercises o'er" with as good grace as ever. I had followers and proposals ; but my mother was again thrown into despair by what she called the short work I made with my admirers, scarcely allowing decent time for their turning into lovers, before I warned them not to think of me. I have heard that women who have suffered from man's inconstancy are disposed afterwards to revenge themselves by inflicting pain such as they have themselves endured, and delight in all the cruelty of coquetry. It was not so with me. Mine was too deep a wound — skinned over — not callous, and all danger of its opening again I dreaded. I had lovers the more, perhaps, because I cared not for them ; till amongst them there came one who, as I saw, appreciated my character, and, as I perceived, was becoming seriously attached. To prevent danger to his happiness, as he would take no other warning, I revealed to him the state of my mind. However humiliating the confession, I thought it due to him. I told him that I had no heart to give — that I had received none in return for that with which 1 had parted, and that love was over with me. '"As a passion, it may be so, not as an affection," was his reply. ' The words opened to me a view of his character. I saw, too, by his love increasing with his esteem, the solidity of his understanding and the nobleness of his nature. He went deeper and deeper into my mind, till he came to a spring of gratitude, which rose and overflowed, vivifying and fertilising the seemingly barren waste. I believe it to be true that, after the first great misfortune, persons never return to be the same that they were before, but this I know — and this it is important you should be convinced of, my dear Helen — that the mind, though sorely smitten, can recover its powers. A mind, I mean, sustained by good principles, and by them made capable of persevering efforts for its own recovery. It may be sure of regaining, in time — observe, I say in time — its healthful tone. ' Time was given to me by that kind, that noble being, who devoted himself to me with a passion which I could not return 70 HELEN • — but, with such affection as I could give, and which he assured me would make his happiness, I determined to devote to him the whole of my future existence. Happiness for me, I thought, was gone, except in so far as I could make him happy. ' I married Lord Davenant — much against my mother's wish, for he was then the younger of three brothers, and with a younger brother's very small portion. Had it been a more splendid match, I do not think I could have been prevailed on to give my consent. I could not have been sure of my own motives, or rather my pride would not have been clear as to the opinion which others might form. This was a weakness, for in acting we ought to depend upon ourselves, and not to look for the praise or blame of others ; but I let you see me as I am, or as I was : I do not insist, like Queen Elizabeth, in having my portrait without shade. CHAPTER VIII ' I AM proud to tell you that at the time I married we were so poor that I was obliged to give up many of those luxuries to which I was entitled, and to which I had been so accustomed that the doing without them had till then hardly come within my idea of possibility. Our whole estabUshment was on the most humble scale. ' I look back to this period of my hfe with the greatest satisfaction. I had exquisite pleasure, like all young people of sanguine temperament and generous disposition, in the con- sciousness of the capabihty of making sacrifices. This notion was my idol, the idol of the inmost sanctuary of my mind, and I worshipped it with all the energies of body and soul. ' In the course of a few years, my husband's two elder brothers died. If you have any curiosity to know how, I will tell you, though indeed it is as little to the purpose as half the things people tell in their histories. The eldest, a home-bred lordling, who, from the moment he slipped his mother's apron- strings, had fallen into folly, and then, to show himself manly, run into vice, lost his life in a duel about some lady's crooked thumb, or more crooked mind. ' The second brother distinguished himself in the navy ; he 71 HELEN died the death of honour ; he fell gloriously, and was by his country honoured — by his country mourned. ' After the death of this young man, the inheritance came to my husband. Fortune soon after poured in upon us a tide of wealth, swelled by collateral streams. ' You will wish to know what effect this change of circum- stances produced upon my mind, and you shall, as far as 1 know it myself I fancied that it ^^'Ould have made none, because I had been before accustomed to all the trappings of wealth ; yet it did make a greater change in my feelings than you could have imagined, or I could have conceived. The possibility of producing a great effect in society, of playing a distinguished part, and attaining an eminence which pleased my fancy, had never till now been within my reach. The incense of fame had been wafted near me, but not to me — near my husband I mean, yet not to him ; I had heard his brother's name from the trumpet of fame, I longed to hear his own. I knew, what to the world was then unknown, his great talents for civil business, which, if urged into action, might make him distinguished as a statesman even beyond his hero brother, but I knew that in him ambition, if it ever awoke, must be awakened by love. Conscious of my influence, I determined to use it to the utmost. ' Lord Davenant had not at that time taken any part in politics, but from his connections he could ask and obtain ; and there was one in the world for whom I desired to obtain a favour of importance. It chanced that he, whom I have mentioned to you as my inconstant lover, now married to my lovely rival, was at this time in some difficulty about a com- mand abroad. His connections, though of very high rank, were not now in power. He had failed in some military exploit which had formerly been entrusted to him. He was anxious to retrieve his character ; his credit, his whole fate in life, depended on his obtaining this appointment, which, at my request, was secured to him by Lord Davenant. The day it was obtained was, I think, the proudest of my life. I was proud of returning good for evil ; that was a Christian pride, if pride can be Christian. I was proud of showing that in me there was none of the fury of a woman scorned — no sense of the injury of charms despised. ' But it was not yet the fulness of success ; it had pained 1- HELEN me in the midst of my internal triumph, that my husband had been obliged to use intermediate powers to obtain that which I should have desired should have been obtained by his own. Why should not he be in that first place of rule ? He could hold the balance with a hand as firm, an eye as just. That he should be in the House of Peers was little satisfaction to me, unless distinguished among his peers. It was this distinction that I burned to see obtained by Lord Davenant ; I urged him forward then by all the motives which make ambition virtue. He was averse from public life, partly from indolence of temper, partly from sound philosophy : power was low in the scale in his estimate of human happiness ; he saw how little can be effected of real good in pubhc by any individual ; he felt it scarcely worth his while to stir from his easy chair of domestic happiness. , However, love urged him on, and inspired him, if not with ambition, at least with what looked like it in public. He entered the lists, and in the political tournament tilted successfully. Many were astonished, for, till they came against him in the joust, they had no notion of his weight, or of his skill in arms ; and many seriously inclined to believe that Lord Davenant was only Lady Davenant in disguise, and all he said, wrote, and did, was attributed to me. Envy gratifies herself continually by thus shifting the merit from one person to another ; in hopes that the actual quantity may be diminished, she tries to make out that it is never the real person, but somebody else, who does that which is good. This silly, base propensity might have cost me dear, would have cost me my husband's affections, had he not been a man, as there are few, above all jealousy of female influence or female talent ; in short, he knew his own superiority, and needed not to measure himself to prove his height. He is quite content, rather glad, that everybody should set him down as a commonplace character. Far from being jealous of his wife's ruling him, he was amused by the notion : it flattered his pride, and it was convenient to his indolence ; it fell in, too, with his pecuUar humour. The more I retired, the more I was put forward, he, laughing behind me, prompted and forbade me to look back. ' Now, Helen, I am come to a point where ambition ceased to be virtue. But why should I tell you all this ? no one is ever the better for the experience of another,' 73 HELEN ' Oh ! I cannot believe that,' cried Helen ; ' pray, pray go on.' ' Ambition first rose in my mind from the ashes of another passion. Fresh materials, of heterogeneous kinds, altered the colour and changed the nature of the flame : I should have told you, but narrative is not my forte — I never can remember to tell things in their right order. I forgot to tell you that when Madame de Stael's book, Sur la Revolution Frangaise, came out, it made an extraordinary impression upon me. I turned, in the first place, as everybody did, eagerly to the chapter on England, but, though my national feelings were gratified, my female pride was dreadfully mortified by what she says of the ladies of England ; in fact, she could not judge of them. They were afraid of her. They would not come out of their shells. What she called timidity, and what I am sure she longed to call stupidity, was the silence of overawed admiration, or mixed curiosity and discretion. Those who did venture had not full possession of their powers, or in a hurry showed them in a wrong direction. She saw none of them in their natural state. She asserts that though there may be women distinguished as writers in England, there are no ladies who have any great conversational and political influence in society, of that kind which, during Vancien regime, was obtained in France by what they would call their femtnes marquantes, such as Madame de Tencin, Madame du Deffand, Mademoiselle de I'Espinasse. This remark stung me to the quick, for my country and for myself, and raised in me a foolish, vainglorious emulation, an ambition false in its objects, and unsuited to the manners, domestic habits, and public virtue of our country. I ought to have been gratified by her observing that a lady is never to be met with in England, as formerly in France, at the Bureau du Ministre ; and that in England there has never been any example of a woman's having known in public affairs, or at least told, what ought to have been kept secret. Between ourselves, I suspect she was a little mistaken in some of these assertions ; but, be that as it may, I determined to prove that she was mistaken ; I was conscious that I had more within me than I had yet brought out ; I did not doubt that I had eloquence, if I had but courage to produce it. It is really astonishing what a mis- chievous effect those few passages produced on my mind. In 74 HELEN London, one book drives out another, one impression, however deep, is effaced by the next shaking of the sand ; but I was then in the country, for, unluckily for me, Lord Davenant had been sent away on some special embassy. Left alone with my nonsense, I set about, as soon as I was able, to assemble an audience round me, to exhibit myself in the character of a female politician, and I believe I had a notion at the same time of being the English Corinne. Rochefoucault, the dexterous anatomist of self-love, says that we confess our small faults, to persuade the world that we have no large ones. But, for my part, I feel that there are some small faults more difficult to me to confess than any large ones. Affectation, for instance ; it is something so little, so paltry, it is more than a crime, it is a ridicule : I believe I did make myself completely ridiculous : I am glad Lord Davenant was not by, it lasted but a short time. Our dear good friend Dumont (you knew Dumont at Florence ?) could not bear to see it ; his regard for Lord Davenant urged him the more to disenchant me, and bring me back, before his return, to my natural form. The disenchantment was rather rude. ' One evening, after I had been snuffing up incense till I was quite intoxicated, when my votaries had departed, and we were alone together, I said to him, "Allow that this is what would be called at Paris un grand succh.'' ' Dumont made no reply, but stood opposite to me playing in his peculiar manner with his great snuff-box, slowly swaying the snuff from side to side. Knowing this to be a sign that he was in some great dilemma, I asked of what he was think- ing. "Of you," said he. "And what of me?" In his French accent he repeated those two provoking lines^ — • New wit, like wine, intoxicates the brain, Too strong for feeble women to sustain.' ' " To my face ? " said I, smiling, for I tried to command my temper. ' " Better than behind your back, as others do," said he. ' " Behind my back ! " said I ; " impossible." ' " Perfectly possible," said he, " as I could prove if you were strong enough to bear it." ' " Quite strong enough," I said, and bade him speak on. ' " Suppose you were offered," said he, " the fairy-ring that 75 HELEN rendered the possessor invisible, and enabled him to hear everything that was said, and all that was thought of him, would you throw it away, or put it on your finger ?" ' " Put it on my finger,'' I replied ; " and this instant, for a true friend is better than a magic ring, I put it on." ' " You are very brave," said he, " then you shall hear the lines 1 heard in a rival salon, repeated by him who last wafted the censer to you to-night." He repeated a kind of doggrel pasquinade, beginning with ' Tell me, gentles, have you seen The prating she, the mock Corinne ? ' Dumont, who had the courage for my good to inflict the blow, could not stay to see its effect, and this time I was left alone, not with my nonsense, but with my reason. It was quite sufficient. I was cured. My only consolation in my disgrace was that I honourably kept Dumont's counsel. The friend who composed the lampoon, from that day to this, never knew that I had heard it ; though I must own I often longed to tell him, when he was offering his incense again, that I wished he would reverse his practice, and let us have the satire in my presence, and keep the flattery for my absence. The graft of affectation, which was but a poor weak thing, fell off at once, but the root of the evil had not yet been reached. My friend Dumont had not cut deep enough, or perhaps feared to cut away too much that was sound and essential to life : my political ambition remained, and on Lord Davenant's return sprang up in full vigour. ' Now it is all over I can analyse and understand my own motives : when I first began my political course, I really and truly had no love for power ; full of other feelings, I was averse from it ; it was absolutely disagreeable to me ; but as people acquire a taste for drams after making faces at first swallowing, so 1, from experience of the excitation, acquired the habit, the love, of this mental dram-drinking ; besides, I had such delightful excuses for myself: I didn't love power for its own sake, it was never used for myself, always for others ; ever with my old principle of sacrifice in full play : this flattering unction I laid to my soul, and it long hid from me its weakness, its gradual corruption. ' The first instance in which I used my influence, and by 76 HELEN my husband's intervention obtained a favour of some import- ance, the thing done, though actually obtained by private favour, was in a public point of vievif vi^ell done and fit to be done ; but when in time Lord Davenant had reached that eminence which had been the summit of my ambition, and when once it was known that I had influence (and in making it known between jest and earnest Lord Davenant was certainly to blame), numbers of course were eager to avail themselves of the discovery, swarms bom in the noontide ray, or such as salute the rising morn, buzzed round me. I was good-natured and glad to do the service, and proud to show that I could do it. I thought I had some right to share with Lord Davenant, at least, the honours and pleasures of patron- age, and so he willingly allowed it to be, as long as my objects were well chosen, though he said to me once with a serious smile, " The patronage of Europe would not satisfy you ; you would want India, and if you had India, you would sigh for the New World." I only laughed, and said, "The same thought as Lord Chesterfield's, only more neatly put." " If all Ireland were given to such a one for his patrimony, he'd ask for the Isle of Man for his cabbage-garden." Lord Davenant did not smile. I felt a little alarmed, and a feeling of estrangement began between us. ' I recollect one day his seeing a note on my table from one of my firotegh, thanking me outrageously, and extolling my very obliging disposition. He read, and threw it down, and with one of his dry-humour smiles repeated, half to himself, ' By flatterers besieged, And so obliging that she ne'er obliged.' ' I thought these lines were in the Characters of Women, and I hunted all through them in vain ; at last I found them in the character of a man, which could not suit me, and I was pacified, and, what is extraordinary, my conscience quite put at ease. ' The week afterwards I went to make some request for a friend : my little boy — for I had a dear little boy then — had come in along with mamma. Lord Davenant complied with my request, but unwillingly I saw, and as if he felt it a weak- ness ; and, putting his hand upon the curly-pated little fellow's head, he said, " This boy rules Greece, I see." The child was 77 HELEN sent for the Grecian history, his father took him on his knee, while he read the anecdote, and as he ended he whispered in the child's ear, " Tell mamma this must not be ; papa should be ruled only by justice." He really had public virtue, I only talked of it. ' After this you will wonder that I could go on, but I did. ' I had at that time a friend, who talked always most romantically, and acted most selfishly, and for some time I never noticed the inconsistency between her words and actions. In fact she had two currents in her mind, two selves, one romantic from books, the other selfish from worldly education and love of fashion, and of the goods of this world. She had charming manners, which I thought went for nothing with me, but which I found stood for everything. In short, she was as caressing, as graceful, in her little ways, and as selfish as a cat. She had claws too, but at first I only felt the velvet. ' It was for this woman that I hazarded my highest happi- ness — my husband's esteem — and for the most paltry object imaginable. She wanted some petty place for some man who was to marry her favourite maid. When I first mentioned it to him. Lord Davenant coldly said, " It can't be done," and his pen went on very quickly with the letter he was writing. Vexed and ashamed, and the more vexed because ashamed, I persisted. " Cannot be done for me V said I. " Not for any- body," said he — " by me, at least." — I thought- — Helen, I am ashamed to tell you what I thought ; but I will tell it you, because it will show you how a mind may be debased by the love of power, or rather by the consequence which its posses- sion bestows. I thought he meant to point out to me that, although he would not do it, I might get it done. And, speak- ing as if to myself, I said, "Then I'll go to such a person ; then I'll use such and such ways and means." ' Looking up from his writing at me, with a look such as I had never seen from him before, he replied, in the words of a celebrated minister, " C est facile de se seniir dc pareih moyens, dest difficile de ^y resoudre." ' I admired him, despised myself, left the room, and went and told my friend decidedly it could not be done. That instant she became my enemy, and I felt her claws. I was proud of the wounds, and showed them to my husband. Now, Helen, you think I am cured for ever, and safe. Alas ! no, 78 HELEN my dear, it is not so easy to cure habit. I have, however, some excuse — let me put it forward ; the person for whom I again transgressed was my mother, and for her I was proud of doing the utmost because she had, as I could not forget, been ready to sacrifice my happiness to her speculations. She had left off building castles in the air, but she had outbuilt herself on earth. She had often recourse to me in her difficulties, and I supplied funds, as well I might, for I had a most liberal allowance from my most liberal lord ; but schemes of my own, very patriotic but not overwise, had in process of time drained my purse. I had a school at Cecilhurst, and a lace- manufactory ; and to teach my little girls I must needs bring over lace-makers from Flanders, and Lisle thread, at an enormous expense : I shut my lace-makers up in a room (for secrecy was necessary), where, like spiders, they quarrelled with each other and fought, and the whole failed. ' Another scheme, very patriotic too, cost me an immensity : trying to make Indian cachemires in England, very beautiful they were, but they left not the tenth part of a penny in my private purse, and then my mother wanted some thousands for a new dairy ; dairies were then the fashion, and hers was to be floored with the finest Dutch tiles, furnished with Sevres china, with plate glass windows, and a porch hung with French mirrors ; so she set me to represent to Lord Davenant her very distressed situation, and to present a petition from her for a pension. The first time I urged my mother's request. Lord Davenant said, " I am sure, Anne, that you do not know what you are asking.'' I desisted. I did not indeed well under- stand the business, nor at all comprehend that I was assisting a fraudulent attempt to obtain public money for a private purpose, but I wished to have the triumph of success, I wished to feel my own influence. ' Had it been foretold to me that I could so forget myself in the intoxication of political power, how I should have dis- dained the prophecy — " Lord, is thy servant a dog that he should do this thing ? " There is a fine sermon of Blair's on this subject ; it had early made a great impression upon me ; but what are good impressions, good feelings, good impulses, good intentions, good any thing, without principle ? ' My mother wondered how I could so easily take a refusal ; she piqued my pride by observing that she was sorry my influ- 79 HELEN ence had declined ; her pity, so near contempt, wounded me, and I unadvisedly exclaimed that my influence had in no way declined. Scarcely had I uttered the words, when I saw the inference to which they laid me open, that I had not used my influence to the utmost for her. My mother had quite sense and just feeling enough to refrain from marking this in words. She noted it only by an observing look, followed by a sigh. She confessed that I had always been so kind, so much kinder than she could have expected, that she would say no more. This was more to the purpose with me than if she had talked for hours. I heard fresh sighs, and saw tears begin to flow — a mother's sighs and tears it is difiicult, and I felt it was shameful, to bear. I was partly melted, much confused, and hurried, too, by visitors coming in, and I hastily promised that I would try once more what I could do. The moment I had time for reflection I repented of what I had promised. But the words were past recall. It was so disagreeable to me to speak about the affair to my husband, that I wanted to get it ofi^ my mind as soon as possible, but the day passed without my being able to find a moment when I could speak to Lord Davenant in private. Company stayed till late, my mother the latest. At parting, as she kissed me, calling me her dearest Anne, she said she was convinced I could do whatever I pleased with Lord Davenant, and as she was going down- stairs, added she was sure the first words she should hear from me in the morning would be " Victory, victory ! " ' I hated myself for admitting the thought, and yet there it was ; I let it in, and could not get it out. From what an indescribable mixture of weak motives or impulses, and often without one reasonable principle, do we act in the most important moments of life. Even as I opened the door of his room I hesitated, my heart beat forebodingly, but I thought I could not retreat, and I went in. ' He was standing on the hearth looking weary, but a reviving smile came on seeing me, and he held out his hand — " My comfort always," said he. ' 1 took his hand, and, hesitating, was again my better self; but 1 would not go back, nor could I begin with any preface. — Thank Heaven that was impossible. I began : ' " Davenant, I am come to ask you a favour, and you must do it for me." 80 HELEN ' " I hope it is in my power, my dear," said he ; "I am sure you would not ask " and there he stopped. ' I told him it was in his power, and that I would not ask it for any creature living, but He put his hand upon my lips, told me he knew what I was going to say, and begged me not to say it ; but I, hoping to carry it off playfully, kissed his hand, and putting it aside said, " I must ask, and you must grant this to my mother." He replied, " It cannot be, Anne, consistently with public justice, and with my public duty. I " ' " Nonsense, nonsense," I said, " such words are only to mask a refusal." Mask, I remember, was the word that hurt him. Of all I could have used, it was the worst : I knew it the instant I had said it. Lord Davenant stepped back, and with such a look ! You, Helen, who have seen only his benign countenance, his smiling eyes, cannot conceive it. I am sure he must have seen how much it alarmed me, for suddenly it changed, and I saw all the melting softness of love. ' O fool ! vain wicked fool that I was ! I thought of "victory," and pursued it. My utmost power of persuasion — words — smiles — and tears I tried — and tried in vain ; and then I could not bear to feel that I had in vain made this trial of power and love. Shame and pride and anger seized me by turns, and raised such a storm within me — such confusion — that I knew not what I did or said. And he was so calm ! looked so at least, though I am sure he was not. His self- possession piqued and provoked me past all bearing. I cannot tell you exactly how it was — it was so dreadfully interesting to me that I am unable to recall the exact words ; but I remember at last hearing him say, in a voice I had never before heard, " Lady Davenant ! " — He had never called me so before ; he had always called me •' Anne " : it seemed as if he had dis- missed me from his heart. ' " Call me Anne ! Oh, call me Anne ! " ' And he yielded instantly, he called me Anne, and caressing me, "his Anne." 'O Helen! never do as I did. I whispered, "Then, my love, you will do this for me — for me, your own Anne ? " ' He put me gently away, and leaned against the chimney- piece in silence. Then turning to me, in a low suppressed voice, he said, G 8i HELEN ' " I have loved you^love you as much as man can love woman, there is nothing I would not sacrifice for you except ' ' " No exceptions ! ' cried I, in an affected tone of gaiety. ' " Except honour,' he repeated firmly. — Helen, my dear, you are of a generous nature, so am I, but the demon of pride was within me, it made me long to try the extent of my power. Disappointed, I sank to meanness ; never, never, however tempted, however provoked, never do as 1 did, never reproach a friend with any sacrifice you have made for them ; this is a meanness which your friend may forgive, but which you can never forgive yourself ' I reproached him with the sacrifice of my feelings, which I had made in marrying him ! His answer was, " I feel that what you say is true : I am now convinced you are incapable of loving me ; and since I cannot make you happy, we had better part. " ' These were the last words I heard. The blow was wholly unexpected. ' Whether I sank down, or threw myself at his feet, I know not ; but when 1 came to myself he was standing beside me. There were other faces, but my eyes saw only his : I felt his hand holding mine ; I pressed it, and said, " Forget." He stooped down and whispered, " It is forgotten." ' I believe there is nothing can touch a generous mind so much as the being treated with perfect generosity — nothing makes us so deeply feel our own fault' Lady Davenant was here so much moved that she could say no more. By an involuntary motion, she checked the reins, and the horses stopped, and she continued quite silent for a few minutes : at length two or three deeply-drawn sighs seemed to relieve her ; she looked up, and her attention seemed to be caught by a bird that was singing sweetly on a branch over their heads. She asked what bird it was. Helen showed it to her where it sat : she looked up and smiled, touched the horses with her whip, and went on where she had left off— ' The next thing was the meeting my mother in the morn- ing ; I prepared myself for it, and thought I was now armed so strong in honesty that I could go through with it well : my morality, however, was a little nervous, was fluttered by the 82 I felt his hand holding mine ; I pressed it, and said, ' Forget.' HELEN knock at the door, and, when I heard her voice as she came towards my room, asking eagerly if I was alone, I felt a sick- ness at the certainty that I must at once crush her hopes. But I stood resolved ; my eyes fixed on the door through which she was to enter. She came in, to my astonishment, with a face radiant with joy, and hastening to me she embraced me with the warmest expression of fondness and gratitude. — I stood petrified as I heard her talk of my kindness — my gener- osity. I asked what she could mean, said there must be some mistake. But holding before my eyes a note, " Can there be any mistake in this ? " said she. That note, for I can never forget it, I will repeat to you. ' " What you wish can be done in a better manner than you proposed. The public must have no concern with it ; Lady Davenant must have the pleasure of doing it her own way ; an annuity to the amount required shall be punctually paid to your banker. The first instalment will be in his hands by the time you receive this. — Davenant." ' When I had been formerly disenchanted from my trance of love, the rudeness of the shock had benumbed all my faculties, and left me scarcely power to think ; but now, when thus recovered from the delirium of power, I was immediately in perfect possession of my understanding, and when I was made to comprehend the despicable use I would have made of my influence, or the influence my husband possessed, I was so shocked that I have ever since, I am conscious, in speaking of any political corruption, rather exaggerated my natural abhorrence of it. Not from the mean and weak idea of con- vincing the world how foreign all such wrong was to my soul, but because it really is foreign to it, because I know how it can debase the most honourable characters ; I feel as much shocked at the criminal as at the crime, because I saw it once in all its hideousness so near myself. ' A change in the ministry took place this year. Lord Dave- nant's resignation was sent in and accepted, and in retire- ment I had not only leisure to be good, but also leisure to cultivate my mind. Of course I had read all such reading as ladies read, but this was very different from the kind of study that would enable me to keep pace with Lord Davenant and his highly -informed friends. Many of these, more men of thought than of show, visited us from time to time in the 84 HELEN country. Though I had passed very well in London society, blue, red, and green, literary, fashionable, and political, and had been extolled as both witty and wise, especially when my husband was in place ; yet when I came into close contact with minds of a higher order, I felt my own deficiencies. Lord Davenant's superiority I particularly perceived in the solidity of the ground he uniformly took and held in reasoning. And when I, too confident, used to venture rashly, and often found myself surrounded, and in imminent danger in argument, he used to bring me off and ably cover my retreat, and looked so pleased, so proud, when I made a happy hit, or jumped to a right conclusion. ' But what I most liked, most admired, in him was, that he never triumphed or took unfair advantages on the strength of his learning, of his acquirements, or of what I may call his logical training. ' I mention these seeming trifles because it is not always in the great occasions of life that a generous disposition shows itself in the way which we most feel. Little instances of generosity shown in this way, unperceived by others, have gone most deeply into my mind ; and have most raised my opinion of his character. The sense that I was over rather than under valued made me the more ready to acknowledge and feel my own deficiencies. I felt the truth of an aphorism of Lord Verulam's, which is now come down to the copy-books ; that " knowledge is power." Having made this notable discovery, I set about with all my might to acquire knowledge. You may smile, and think that this was only in a new form the passion for power ; no, it was something better. Not to do myself injustice, I now felt the pure desire of knowledge, and enjoyed the pure pleasure of obtaining it ; assisted, supported, and delighted, by the sympathy of a superior mind. ' As to intellectual happinesSj this was the happiest time of my life. As if my eyes had been rubbed by your favourite dervise in the Arabian tales with his charmed ointment, which opened at once to view all the treasures of the earth, I saw and craved the boundless treasures opened to my view. I now wanted to read all that Lord Davenant was reading, that I might be up to his ideas, but this was not to be done in an instant. There was a Frenchwoman who complained that she never could learn anything, because she could not find anybody 8S HELEN to teach her all she wanted to know in two words. I was not quite so exigeante as this lady ; but, after having skated on easily and rapidly, far on the superficies of knowledge, it was difficult and rather mortifying to have to go back and begin at the beginning. Yet, when I wanted to go a little deeper, and really to understand what I was about, this was essentially necessary. I could not have got through without the assist- ance of one who showed me what I might safely leave unlearned, and who pointed out what fruit was worth climbing for, what would only turn to ashes. ' This happy time of my life too quickly passed away. It was interrupted, however, not by any fault or folly of my own, but by an infliction from the hand of Providence, to which I trust I submitted with resignation — we lost our dear little boy ; my second boy was born dead, and my confinement was followed by long and severe illness. I was ordered to try the air of Devonshire. ' One night — now, my dear, I have kept for the last the only romantic incident in my life — one night, a vessel was wrecked upon our coast ; one of the passengers, a lady, an invalid, was brought to our house : I hastened to her assist- ance — it was my beautiful rival ! ' She was in a deep decline, and had been at Lisbon for some time, but she was now sent home by the physicians, as they send people from one country to another, to die. The captain of the ship in which she was mistook the lights upon the coast, and ran the ship ashore near to our house. ' Of course we did for her all we could, but she was dying : she knew nothing of my history, and I trust I soothed her last moments — she died in my arms. ' She had one child, a son, then at Eton : we sent for him ; he arrived too late ; the feeling he showed interested us deeply ; we kept him with us some time ; he was grateful ; and after- wards as he grew up he often wrote to me. His letters you have read.' ' Mr. Beauclerc ! ' said Helen. ' Mr. Beauclerc. — I had not seen him for some time, when General Clarendon presented him to me as his ward at Florence, where I had opportunities of essentially serving him. ' You may now understand, my dear, why I had expected that Mr. Granville Beauclerc might have preferred coming to 86 HELEN Clarendon Park this last month of my stay in England to the pleasures of London. I was angry, I own, but after five minutes' grace I cooled, saw that I must be mistaken, and came to the just conclusion of the old poet, that no one sinks at once to the depth of ill, and ingratitude I consider as the depth of ill. I opine, therefore, that some stronger feeling than friendship now operates to detain Granville Beauclerc. In that case I forgive him, but, for his own sake, and with such a young man I should say for the sake of society — of the public good — for he will end in public hfe, I hope the present object is worthy of him, whoever she may be. ' Have I anything more to tell you ? Yes, I should say that, when by changes in the political world Lord Davenant was again in power, I had learned, if not to be less ambitious, at least to show it less. D , who knew always how to put sense into my mind, so that I found it there, and thought it completely my own, had once said that " every public man who has a cultivated and high-minded wife has in fact two selves, each holding watch and ward for the other." The notion pleased me — pleased both my fancy and my reason ; I acted on it, and Lord Davenant assures me that I have been this second self to him, and I am willing to believe it, first because he is a man of strict truth, and secondly, because every woman is willing to believe what she wishes.' Lady Davenant paused, and after some minutes of reflection said, ' I confess, however, that I have not reason to be quite satisfied with myself as a mother ; I did not attend suflSciently to Cecilia's early education : engrossed with politics, I left her too much to governesses, at one period to a very bad one. I have done what I can to remedy this, and you have done more perhaps ; but I much fear that the early neglect can never be completely repaired ; she is, however, married to a man of sense, and when I go to Russia I shall think with satisfaction that I leave you with her.' After expressing how deeply she had been interested in all that she had heard, and how grateful she felt for the confidence reposed in her, Helen said she could not help wishing that Ceciha knew all that had been just told her of Lady Davenant's history. If Cecilia could but know all the tenderness of her mother's heart, how much less would she fear, how much more would she love her ! 87 HELEN ' It would answer no purpose,' replied Lady Davenant ; ' there are persons with intrinsic differences of character, who, explain as you will, can never understand one another beyond a certain point. Nature and art forbid — no spectacles you can furnish will remedy certain defects of vision. Cecilia sees as much as she can ever see of my character, and I see, in the best light, the whole of hers. So Helen, my dear, take the advice of a Scotch proverb — proverbs are vulgar because they usually contain common sense — " Let well alone." ' You are really a very good little friend,' added she, ' but keep my personal narrative for your own use.' CHAPTER IX It was late before they reached home, and Helen dressed as fast as possible, for the General's punctual habits required that all should assemble in the drawing-room five minutes at least before dinner. She was coming down the private turret stair- case, which led from the family apartments to the great hall, when, just at the turn, and in the most awkward way possible, she met a gentleman, a stranger, where never stranger had been seen by her before, running up full speed, so that they had but barely space and time to clear out of each other's way. Pardons were begged of course. The manner and voice of the stranger were particularly gentlemanlike. A servant followed with his portmanteau, inquiring into which room Mr. Beauclerc was to go. ' Mr. Beauclerc ! ' — When Helen got to the dravnng-room, and found that not even the General was there, she thought she could have time to run up the great staircase to Lady Davenant's room, and tell her that Mr. Beauclerc was come. 'My dear Lady Davenant, Mr. Beauclerc!' — He was there ! and she made her retreat as quickly as possible. The quantity that had been said about him, and the awkward way in which they had thus accidentally met, made her feel much embarrassed when they were regularly introduced. At the beginning of dinner Helen fancied that there was unusual silence and constraint ; perhaps this might be so, or Just at the turn she met a gentleman^ a strcmgct. HELEN perhaps people were really hungry, or perhaps Mr. Beauclerc had not yet satisfied the General and Lady Davenant : how- ever, towards the end of dinner, and at the dessert, he was certainly entertaining ; and Lady Cecilia appeared particularly amused by an account which he was giving of a little French piece he had seen just before he left London, called " Les Premieres Amours," and Helen might have been amused too, but that Lady Cecilia called upon her to listen, and, Mr. Beauclerc turning his eyes upon her, she saw, or fancied, that he was put out in his story, and though he went on with perfect good breeding, yet it was evidently with diminished spirit. As soon as politeness permitted, at the close of the story, she, to relieve him and herself, turned to the aide-de-camp on her other side, and devoted, or seemed to devote, to him her exclusive attention. He was always tiresome to her, but now more than ever ; he went on, when once set a-going, about his horses and his dogs, while she had the mortification of hearing, almost immediately after her seceding, that Mr. Beauclerc recovered the life and spirit of his tone, and was in full and delightful enjoyment of conversation with Lady Cecilia. Something very entertaining caught her ear every now and then ; but, with her eyes fixed in the necessary direction, it was impossible to make it out, through the aide-de-camp's never-ending tediousness. She thought the sitting after dinner never would terminate, though it was in fact rather shorter than usual. As soon as they reached the drawing-room, Lady Cecilia asked her mother what was the cause of Granville's delay in town, and why he had come to-day, after he had written it was impossible. Lady Davenant answered that he had ' trampled,' as Lord Chatham did, ' on impossibilities.' ' It was not a physical impossibility, it seems.' ' I'm sure — I hope,' continued Cecilia, ' that none of the Beltravers set had anything to do with his delay, yet from a word or two the General let fall, I'm almost sure that they have — Lady Blanche, I'm afraid ' There she stopped. ' If it were only a money difficulty with Lord Beltravers,' resumed she, ' that might be easily settled, for Beauclerc is rich enough.' ' Yes,' said Lady Davenant, ' but rashly generous ; an 90 HELEN uncommon fault in these days, when young men are in general selfishly prudent or selfishly extravagant.' ' I hope,' said Cecilia, — ' I hope Lady Blanche Forrester will not ' there she paused, and consulted her mother's countenance ; her mother answered that Beauclerc had not spoken to her of Lady Blanche. After putting her hopes and fears, questions and conjectures, into every possible form and direction. Lady Cecilia was satisfied that her mother knew no more than herself, and this was a great comfort. When Mr. Beauclerc reappeared, Helen was glad that she was settled at an embroidery frame, at the farthest end of the room, as there, apart from the world, she felt safe from all cause for embarrassment, and there she continued happy till some one came to raise the light of the lamp over her head. It was Mr. Beauclerc, and, as she looked up, she gave a foolish little start of surprise, and then all her confusion returning, with thanks scarce audible, her eyes were instantly fixed on the vine-leaf she was embroidering. He asked how she could by lamplight distinguish blue from green ? a simple and not very alarming question, but she did not hear the words rightly, and thinking he asked whether she wished for a screen, she answered, ' No, thank you.' Lady Cecilia laughed, and covering Helen's want of hearing by Beauclerc's want of sight, explained — 'Do not you see, Granville, the silk-cards are written upon, " blue " and "green" ? there can be no mistake.' Mr. Beauclerc made a few more laudable attempts at con- versation with Miss Stanley, but she, still imagining that this was forced, could not in return say anything but what seemed forced and unnatural, and as unlike her usual self as possible. Lady Cecilia tried to relieve her ; she would have done better to have let it alone, for Beauclerc was not of the French wit's opinion that La modestie n'est bonne gu'd quinze ans, and to him it appeared only a graceful timidity. Helen retired earlier than any one else, and, when she thought over her foolish awkwardness, felt as much ashamed as if Mr. Beauclerc had actually heard all that Lady Cecilia had said about him — had seen all her thoughts, and understood the reason of her confusion. At last, when Lady Cecilia came into her room before she went to bed, she began with — -^ I am sure you are going to scold me, and I deserve it, I am so provoked with 91 HELEN myself) and the worst of it is, that I do not think I shall ever get over it — I am afraid I shall be just as foolish again to- morrow.' ' I could find it in my heart to scold you to death,' said Lady Cecilia, ' but that I am vexed myself Then hesitating, and studying Helen's countenance, she seemed doubtful how to proceed. Either she was playing with Helen's curiosity, or she was really herself perplexed. She made two or three beginnings, each a little inconsistent with the other. 'Mamma is always right; with her — "coming events" really and truly " cast their shadows before." I do believe she has the fatal gift, the coming ill to know ! ' ' 111 ! ' said Helen ; ' what ill is coming ? ' ' After all, however, it may not be an ill,' said Lady Cecilia ; ' it may be all for the best ; yet I am shockingly disappointed, though I declare I never formed any ' ' Oh, my dear Cecilia, do tell me at once what it is you mean.' ' I mean that Granville Beauclerc, like all men of genius, has acted like the greatest fool.' ' What has he done ? ' ' He is absolutely — you must look upon him in future — as a married man.' Helen was delighted. Cecilia could form no further schemes on her account, and she felt relieved from all her awkwardness. ' Dearest Helen, this is well at all events,' cried Cecilia, seeing her cleared countenance. ' This comforts me ; you are at ease ; and, if I have caused you one uncomfortable evening, I am sure you are consoled for it by the reflection that my mother was right, and 1, as usual, wrong. But, Helen,' continued she earnestly, ' remember that this is not to be known ; remember you must not breathe the least hint of what I have told you to mamma or the General.' Something more than astonishment appeared in Helen's countenance. ' And is it possible that Mr. Beauclerc does not tell them, — does not trust his guardian and such a friend as your mother ? ' said Helen. ' He will tell them, he will tell them — but not yet ; perhaps not till — he is not to see his fiancee — they have for some 92 HELEN reason agreed to be separated for some time — I do not know exactly, but surely everybody may choose their own oppor- tunity for telling their own secrets. In fact, Helen, the lady, I understand, made it a point with him that nothing should be said of it yet — to any one.' ' But he told it to you ? ' ' No, indeed, he did not tell it : I found it out, and he could not deny it ; but he charged me to keep it secret, and I would not have told it to anybody living but yourself; and to you, after all I said about him, I felt it was necessary — I thought I was bound — in short, I thought it would set things to rights, and put you at your ease at once.' And then, with more earnestness, she again pressed upon Helen a promise of secrecy, especially towards Lady Davenant. Helen submitted. Cecilia embraced her affectionately, and left the room. Quite tired, and quite happy, Helen was in bed and asleep in a few minutes. Not the slightest suspicion crossed her mind that all her friend had been telling her was not perfectly true. To a more practised, a less confiding, person the perplexity of Lady Cecilia's prefaces, and some contradictions or inconsistencies, might have suggested doubts ; but Helen's general confidence in her friend's truth had never yet been seriously shaken. Lady Davenant she had always thought prejudiced on this point, and too severe. If there had been in early childhood a bad habit of inaccuracy in Cecilia, Helen thought it long since cured ; and so perhaps it was, till she formed a friendship abroad with one who had no respect for truth. But of this Helen knew nothing ; and, in fact, till now Lady Cecilia's aberrations had been always trifling, almost imperceptible, errors, such as only her mother's strictness or Miss Clarendon's scrupulosity could detect. Nor would Cecilia have ventured upon a decided, an important, false assertion, except for a kind purpose. Never in her life had she told a falsehood to injure any human creature, or one that she could foresee might, by any possibiUty, do harm to any living being. But here was a friend, a very dear friend, in an awkward embarrassment, and brought into it by her means ; and by a little innocent stretching of the truth she could at once, she fancied, set all to rights. The moment the idea came into her head, upon the spur of the occasion, she resolved 93 HELEN to execute it directly. It was settled between the drawing- room door and her dressing-room. And when thus executed successfully, with happy sophistry she justified it to herself. ' After all,' said she to herself, ' though it was not absolutely true, it was ben trovato, it was as near the truth, perhaps, as possible. Beauclerc's best friends really feared that he was faUing in love with the lady in question. It was very likely, and too likely, it might end in his marrying this Lady Blanche Forrester. And, on every account, and every way, it was far the best that Helen should consider him as a married man. This would restore Helen by one magical stroke to herself, and release her from that wretched state in which she could neither please nor be pleased.' And as far as this good effect upon Helen was concerned, Lady Cecilia's plan was judicious ; it succeeded admirably. Wonderful ! how a few words spoken, a single idea taken out of or put into the mind, can make such a difference, not only in the mental feelings, but in the whole bodily appear- ance, and in the actual powers of perception and use of our senses. When Helen entered the breakfast-room the next morning, she looked, and moved, and felt, quite a different creature from what she had been the preceding day. She had recovered the use of her understanding, and she could hear and see quite distinctly ; and the first thing she saw was, that nobody was thinking particularly about her ; and now she for the first time actually saw Mr. Beauclerc. She had before looked at him without seeing him, and really did not know what sort of looking person he was, except that he was like a gentleman ; of that she had a sort of intuitive perception ; — as Cuvier could tell from the first sight of a single bone what the animal was, what were its habits, and to what class it belonged, so any person early used to good company can, by the first gesture, the first general manner of being, passive or active, tell whether a stranger, even scarcely seen, is or is not a gentleman. At the beginning of breakfast Mr. Beauclerc had all the perfect English quiet of look and manners, with somewhat of a high-bred air of indifference to all sublunary things, yet saying and doing whatever was proper for the present company ; yet it was done and said like one in a dream, performed like a 94 HELEN somnambulist, correctly from habit, but all unconsciously. He awakened from his reverie the moment General Clarendon came in, and he asked eagerly, ' General, how far is it to Old Forest ? ' These were the first words which he pronounced like one wide awake. ' I must ride there this morning ; it's absolutely necessary.' The General replied that he did not see the necessity. ' But when I do, sir,' cried Beauclerc ; the natural vivacity of the young man breaking through the conventional manner. Next moment, with a humble look, he hoped that the General would accompany him, and the look of proud humility vanished from his countenance the next instant, because the General demurred, and Beauclerc added, 'Will not you oblige me so far? Then I must go by myself The General, seeming to go on with his own thoughts, and not to be moved by his ward's impatience, talked of a review that was to be put off, and at length found that he could accompany him. Beauclerc then, delighted, thanked him warmly. 'What is the object of this essential visit to Old Forest, may I ask ? ' said Lady Davenant. ' To see a dilapidated house,' said the General. ' To save a whole family from ruin,' cried Beauclerc ; ' to restore a man of first-rate talents to his place in society.' ' Pshaw ! ' said the General. ' Why that contemptuous exclamation, my dear General ? ' said Beauclerc. ' I have told you, and again I tell you, the thing is impos- sible ! ' said the General. ' So I hear you say, sir,' replied his ward ; ' but till I am convinced, I hold to my project.' ' And what is your project, Granville ? ' said Lady Davenant. ' I will explain it to you when we are alone,' said Beauclerc. ' I beg your pardon, I was not aware that there was any mystery,' said Lady Davenant. ' No mystery,' said Beauclerc, ' only about lending some money to a friend.' ' To which I will not consent,' said the General. 'Why not, sir?' said Beauclerc, throwing back his head with an air of defiance in his countenance ; there was as he 95 HELEN looked at his guardian a quick, mutable succession of feelings, in striking contrast with the fixity of the General's appearance. ' I have given you my reasons, Beauclerc,' said the General. ' It is unnecessary to repeat what I have said, you will do no good.' 'No good, General? When I tell you that if I lend Beltravers the money, to put his place in repair, to put it in such a state that his sisters could live in it, he would no longer be a banished man, a useless absentee, a wanderer abroad, but he would come and settle at Old Forest, re- establish the fortune and respectability of his family, and above all, save his own character and happiness. Oh, my dear General ! ' General Clarendon, evidently moved by his ward's benevolent enthusiasm, paused and said that there were many recollections which made it rather painful to him to revisit Old Forest. Still he would do it for Beauclerc, since nothing but seeing the place would convince him of the impracticability of his scheme. ' I have not been at Old Forest,' continued the General, ' since I was a boy — since it was deserted by the owners, and sadly changed I shall find it. ' In former times these Forresters were a respectable, good old English family, till the second wife, pretty and silly, took a fancy for figuring in London, where of course she was nobody. Then, to make herself somebody, she forced her husband to stand for the county. A contested election — bribery — a petition — another election — ruinous expense. Then that Beltravers title coming to them : and they were to live up to it, — and beyond their income. The old story — over head and shoulders in debt. Then the new story, — that they must go abroad for economy ! ' ' Economy ! The cant of all those who have not courage to retrench at home,' said Lady Davenant. ' They must,' they said, ' live abroad, it is so cheap,' continued the General. ' So cheap to leave their house to go to ruin ! Cheap education too ! and so good — and what does it come to ? ' ' A cheap provision it is for a family in many cases,' said Lord Davenant. ' Wife, son, and daughter, Satan, are thy own.' 'Not in this case,' cried Beauclerc ; 'you cannot mean, I hope.' 96 HELEN ' I can answer for one, the daughter at least,' said Lady Davenant ; ' that Mad. de St. Cimon, whom we saw abroad, at Florence, you know, Cecilia, with whom I would not let you form an acquaintance.' ' Your ladyship was quite right,' said the General. Beauclerc could not say, ' Quite wrong,' — and he looked — suffering. ' I know nothing of the son,' pursued Lady Davenant. ' I do,' said Beauclerc, 'he is my friend.' ' I thought he had been a very distressed man, that young Beltravers,' said the aide-de-camp. ' And if he were, that would not prevent my being his friend, sir,' said Beauclerc. ' Of course,' said the aide-de-camp, ' 1 only asked.' ' He is a man of genius and feeling,' continued Beauclerc, turning to Lady Davenant. ' But I never heard you mention Lord Beltravers before. How long has he been your friend ? ' said Lady Davenant. Beauclerc hesitated. The General without hesitation answered, ' Three weeks and one day.' ' I do not count my friendship by days or weeks,' said Beauclerc. ' No, my dear Beauclerc,' said the General : ' well would it be for you if you would condescend to any such common- sense measure.' He rose from the breakfast-table as he spoke, and rang the bell to order the horses. ' You are prejudiced against Beltravers, General ; but you will think better of him, I am sure, when you know him.' ' You will think worse of him when you know him, I suspect,' replied the General. ' Suspect ! But since you only suspect^ said Beauclerc, ' we English do not condemn on suspicion, unheard, unseen.' ' Not unheard,' said the General ; ' I have heard enough of him.' ' From the reports of his enemies,' said Beauclerc. ' I do not usually form my judgment,' replied the General, ' from reports either of friends or enemies ; I have not the honour of knowing any of Lord Beltravers's enemies.' ' Enemies of Lord Beltravers ! ' exclaimed Lady Davenant. ' What right has he to enemies as if he were a great man ? — a person of whom nobody ever heard, setting up to have H 97 HELEN enemies ! But nowadays, these candidates for fame, these would-be celebrated, set up their enemies as they would their equipages, on credit — then, by an easy process of logic, make out the syllogism thus : — Every great man has enemies, therefore, every man who has enemies must be great — hey, Beauclerc ? ' Beauclerc vouchsafed only a faint, absent smile, and, turning to his guardian, asked — ' Since Lord Beltravers was not to be allowed the honour of enemies, or the benefit of pleading prejudice, on what did the General form his judgment ? ' ' From his own words.' ' Stay judgment, my dear General,' cried Beauclerc ; ' words repeated ! by whom ? ' ' Repeated by no one — heard from himself, by myself ' Yourself 1 I was not aware you had ever met ; — when ? where ? ' Beauclerc started forward on his chair, and listened eagerly for the answer. 'Pity,' said Lady Davenant, speaking to herself, — 'pity that " with such quick affections kindling into flame," they should burn to waste.' ' When, where ? ' repeated Beauclerc, with his eyes fixed on his guardian, and his soul in his eyes. Soberly and slowly his guardian answered, and categorically, — ' When did I meet Lord Beltravers ? A short time before his father's death. Where ? At Lady Grace Bland's.' ' At Lady Grace Bland's ! — where he could not possibly appear to advantage ! Well, go on, sir.' ' One moment — pardon me, Beauclerc ; I have curiosity as well as yourself May I ask why Lord Beltravers could not possibly have appeared to advantage at Lady Grace Bland's ? ' ' Because I know he cannot endure her ; I have heard him, speaking of her, quote what Johnson or somebody says of Clariss — " a prating, preaching, frail creature." ' ' Good ! ' said the General, ' he said this of his own aunt ! ' ' Aunt ! You cannot mean that Lady Grace is his aunt ? ' cried Beauclerc. ' She is his mother's sister,' rephed the General, ' and therefore is, I conceive, his aunt.' ' Be it so,' cried Beauclerc ; ' people must tell the truth sometimes, even of their own relations ; they must know it 98 HELEN best, and therefore I conclude that what Beltravers said of Lady Grace is true.' ' Bravo ! well jumped to a conclusion, Granville, as usual,' said Lady Davenant. ' But go on. General, tell us what you have heard from this precious lord ; can you have better than what Beauclerc, his own witness, gives in evidence ? ' ' Better, I think, and in the same line,' said the General ; ' his lordship has the merit of consistency. At table, servants of course present, and myself a stranger, I heard Lord Beltravers begin by cursing England and all that inhabit it. " But your country ! " remonstrated his aunt. He abjured England ; he had no country, he said, no liberal man ever has ; he had no relations — what nature gave him without his consent he had a right to disclaim, I think he argued. But I can swear to these words, with which he concluded — "My father is an idiot, my mother a brute, and my sister may go to the devil her own way." ' ' Such bad taste ! ' said the aide-de-camp. Lady Davenant smiled at the unspeakable astonishment in Helen's face. ' When you have lived one season in the world, my dear child, this power of surprise will be worn out.' ' But even to those who have seen the world,' said the aide-de-camp, who had seen the world, ' as it strikes me, really it is such extraordinary bad taste ! ' ' Such ordinary bad taste ! as it strikes me,' said Lady Davenant ; ' base imitation, and imitation is always a confession of poverty, a want of original genius. But then there are degrees among the race of imitators. Some choose their originals well, some come near them tolerably ; but here, all seems equally bad, clumsy, Birmingham counterfeit ; don't you think so, Beauclerc .■' a counterfeit that falls and makes no noise. There is the worst of it for your p/'oteg^, whose great ambition I am sure it is to make a noise in the world. How- ever, I may spare my remonstrances,' for I am quite aware that you would never let drop a friend.' ' Never, never ! ' cried Beauclerc. ' Then, my dear Granville, do not take up this man, this Lord Beltravers, for, depend upon it, he will never do. If he had made a bold stroke for a reputation, like a great original, and sported some deed without a name, to work upon the wonder-loving imagination of the credulous English public, one 99 HELEN might have thought something of him. But this cowardly, negative sin, not honouring his father and mother ! so common- place, too, neutral tint — no effect. Quite a failure, one cannot even stare, and you know, Granville, the object of all these strange speeches is merely to make fools stare. To be the wonder of the London world for a single day is the great ambition of these ephemeral fame-hunters, " insects that shine, buzz, and fly-blow in the setting sun." ' Beauclerc pushed away his tea-cup half across the table, ex- claiming, ' How unjust ! to class him among a tribe he detests and despises as much as you can, Lady Davenant. And all for that one unfortunate speech. — Not quite fair, General, not quite philosophical. Lady Davenant, to decide on a man's character from the specimen of a single speech : this is like judging of a house from the sample of a single brick. All this time I know how Beltravers came to make that speech — I know how it vvfas, as well as if I had been present — better ! ' ' Better ! ' cried Lady Cecilia. ' Ladies and gentlemen may laugh,' resumed Beauclerc, ' but I seriously maintain — better ! ' ' How better than the General, who was present, and heard and saw the whole ? ' said Lady Cecilia. ' Yes, better, for he saw only effects, and I know causes ; and I appeal to Lady Davenant, — from Lady Davenant sarcastic to Lady Davenant philosophic I appeal — may not the man who discovers causes say he knows more than he who merely sees effects ? ' ' He may say he knows more, at all events,' replied Lady Davenant ; ' but now for the discovery of causes, metaphysical sir.' ' I have done,' cried the General, turning to leave the breakfast-room ; ' v-'hen Beauclerc goes to metaphysics I gi^e it up.' ' No, no, do not give it up, my dear General,' cried Lady Cecilia ; ' do not stir till we have heard what will come next, for I am sure it will be something delightfully absurd.' Beauclerc bowed, and feared he should not justify her lady- ship's good opinion, for he had nothing dehghtfully absurd to say, adding that the cause of his friend's appearing like a brute was, that he feared to be a hypocrite among hypocrites. ' Lord Beltravers was in company with a set who were 100 HELEN striving, with all their might of dissimulation, to appear better than they are, and he, as he always does, strove to make himself appear worse than he really is.' ' Unnecessary, I should think,' said Lady Davenant. ' Impossible, I should think,' said the General. ' Impossible I know it is to change your opinion, General, of any one,' said Beauclerc. ' For my own part, I am glad of that,' said Lady Cecilia, rising ; ' and I advise you, Granville, to rest content with the General's opinion of yourself, and say no more.' ' But,' said Beauclerc ; ' one cannot be content to think only of oneself always.' 'Say no more, say no more,' repeated Lady Cecilia, smiling as she looked back from the door, where she had stopped the General. ' For my sake say no more, I entreat ; I do dislike to hear so much said about anything or anybody. What sort of a road is it to Old Forest ? ' continued she ; ' why should not we ladies go with you, my dear Clarendon, to enliven the way ? ' Clarendon's countenance brightened at this proposal. The road was certainly beautiful, he said, by the banks of the Thames. Lady Cecilia and the General left the room, but Beauclerc remained sitting at the breakfast-table, apparently intently occupied in forming a tripod of three tea-spoons ; Lady Davenant opposite to him, looking at him earnestly. ' Granville ! ' said she. He started. ' Granville ! set my mind at ease by one word, tell me the mot cPMgme of this sudden friendship.' ' Not what you suppose,' said he steadily, yet colouring deeply. ' The fact is, that Beltravers and I were school- fellows ; a generous little fellow he was as ever was born ; he got me out of a sad scrape once at his own expense, and I can never forget it. We had never met since we left Eton, till about three weeks ago in town, when I found him in great difficulties, persecuted too, by a party — I could not turn my back on him — I would rather be shot ! ' ' No immediate necessity for being shot, my dear Granville, I hope,' said Lady Davenant. 'But if this be indeed all, I will never say another word against your Lord Beltravers ; I will leave it to you to find out his character, or to time to show it. I shall be quite satisfied that you throw away your money. HELEN if it be only money that is in the question ; be this Lord Beltravers what he may. Let him say, " or let them do, it is all one to me," provided that he does not marry you to his sister.' ' He has not a thought of it,' cried Beauclerc ; ' and if he had, do you conceive. Lady Davenant, that any man on earth could dispose of me in marriage, at his pleasure ? ' ' I hope not,' said Lady Davenant. ' Be assured not ; my own will, my own heart alone, must decide that matter.' ' The horses are at the door ! ' cried Cecilia, as she entered ; ' but Where's Helen ? ' Helen had made her escape out of the room when Lady Davenant had pronounced the words, ' Set my mind at rest, Granville,' as she felt it must then be embarrassing to him to speak, and to herself to hear. Her retreat had not, however, been effected without considerable loss, she had been compelled to leave a large piece of the crape-trimming of her gown under the foot of Lady Davenant's inexorable chair. ' Here is something that belongs to Miss Stanley, if I mistake not,' said the General, who first spied the fragment. The aide-de-camp stooped for it — Lady Cecilia pitied it — Lady Davenant pronounced it to be Helen's own fault — Beauclerc understood how it happened, and said nothing. ' But, Helen,' cried Lady Cecilia, as she reappeared, — ' but, Helen, are you not coming with us ? ' Helen had intended to have gone in the pony-carriage with Lady Davenant but her ladyship now declared that she had business to do at home ; it was settled therefore that Helen was to be of the riding party, and that party consisted of Lady Cecilia and the General, Beauclerc and herself. CHAPTER X It was a delightful day, sun shining, not too hot, air balmy, birds singing, all nature gay ; and the happy influence was quickly felt by the riding party. Unpleasant thoughts of the past or future, if any such had been, were now lost in present 103 HELEN enjoyment. The General, twice a man on horseback, as he always felt himself, managed his own and Helen's horse to admiration, and Cecilia, riding on with Beauclerc, was well pleased to hear his first observation, that he had been quite wrong last night, in not acknowledging that Miss Stanley was beautiful. ' People look so different by daylight and by candlelight,' said he ; ' and so different when one does not know them at all, and when one begins to know something of them.' ' But what can you know yet of Helen ? ' ' One forms some idea of character from trifles light as air. How delightful this day is ! ' ' And now you really allow she may be called beautiful ? ' ' Yes, that is, with some expression of mind, heart, soul, which is what I look for in general,' said Beauclerc. ' In general, what can you mean by in general ? ' ' Not in particular ; in particular cases I might think — I might feel — otherwise.' ' In particular, then, do you like fools that have no mind, heart, or soul, Granville ? Answer me.' ' Take care,' said he, ' that horse is too spirited for a lady.' 'Not for me,' said Lady Cecilia; 'but do not think you shall get ofif so ; what did you mean ? ' ' My meaning lies too deep for the present occasion.' ' For the present company^eh ? ' Beauclerc half smiled and answered — ' You know you used to tell me that you hated long discussions on words and nice distinctions.' ' Well, well, but let me have the nice distinction now.' ' Between love and friendship, then, there is a vast differ- ence in what one wishes for in a woman's face ; there are " faces which pale passion loves." ' ' To the right, turn,' the General's voice far behind was heard to say. To the right they turned, into a glade of the park, which opened to a favourite view of the General's, to which Cecilia knew that all attention must be paid. He came up, and they proceeded through a wood which had been planted by his father, and which seemed destined to stand for ever secure from sacrilegious axe. The road led them next into a village, one of the prettiest of that sort of scattered English villages, 103 HELEN where each habitation seems to have been suited to the fancy as well as to the convenience of each proprietor ; giving an idea at once of comfort and liberty, such as can be seen only in England. Happy England, how blest, would she but know her bliss ! This village was inhabited by the General's tenants. His countenance brightened and expanded, as did theirs, whenever he came amongst them ; he saw them happy, and they knew that they owed their happiness in just proportion to their landlord and themselves ; therefore there was a comfortable mixture in their feelings of gratitude and self-respect. Some old people who were sitting on the stone benches, sunning themselves at their doors, rose as he passed, cap in hand, with cordial greeting. The oldest man, the father of the village, forgot his crutch as he came forward to see his landlord's bride, and to give him joy. At every house where they stopped, out came husband, wife, and children, even ' wee toddling things ' ; one of these, while the General was speak- ing to its mother, made its way frightfully close to his horse's heels : Helen saw it, and called to the mother. The General, turning and leaning back on his horse, said to the bold little urchin as the mother snatched him up, ' My boy, as long as you live never again go behind a horse's heels.' ' And remember, it was General Clarendon gave you this advice,' added Beauclerc, and turning to Lady Cecilia — ' " Et souTjenez vous que c'est Marcchal Turenne qui vous ta dit." ' While the General searched for that Enghsh memento, six- pence, Lady Cecilia repeated, ' Marshal Turenne ! I do not understand.' ' Yes, if you recollect,' said Helen, ' you do.' ' I daresay I know, but I don't remember,' said Cecilia. ' It was only,' said Helen, ' that the same thing had hap- pened to Marshal Turenne, that he gave the same advice to a little child.' Lady Cecilia said she owed Beauclerc an acknowledgment down to her saddle-bow, for the compliment to her General, and a bow at least as low to Helen, for making her comprehend it ; and, having paid both debts with graceful promptitude, she observed, in an aside to Beauclerc, that she quite agreed with him, that ' In friendship it was good not to have to do with fools.' 104 HELEN He smiled. ' It is always permitted,' continued Cecilia, ' to woman to use her intellects so far as to comprehend what man says ; her knowledge, of whatever sort, never comes amiss when it serv,es only to illustrate what is said by one of the lords of the creation. Let us note this, my dear Helen, as a general maxim, for future use, and pray, since you have so good a memory, re- member to tell mamma, who says I never generalise, that this morning I have actually made and established a philosophical maxim, one that may be of some use too, which cannot be said of all reflections, general or particular.' They rode on through a lane bright and fragrant with prim- roses and violets ; gradually winding, this lane opened at last upon the beautiful banks of the Thames, whose 'silver bosom' appeared at once before them in the bright sunshine, silent, flowing on, seeming, as Beauclerc said, as if it would for ever flow on unaltered in full, broad, placid dignity. ' Here,' he exclaimed, as they paused to contemplate the view, 'the throng of commerce, the ponderous barge, the black steam- boat, the hum and din of business, never have violated the mighty current. No lofty bridge insultingly overarches it, no stone-built wharf confines it ; nothing but its own banks, coeval with itself, and, like itself, uncontaminated by the petty uses of mankind ! — they spread into large parks, or are hung with thick woods, as nature wills. No citizen's box, no chi- mera villa destroys the idea of repose ; but nature, uninter- rupted, carries on her own operations in field, and flood, and tree.' The General, less poetically inclined, would name to Helen all the fine places within view — ' Residences,' as he practi- cally remarked, ' such as cannot be seen in any country in the world but England ; and not only fine places such as these, but from the cottage to the palace — " the homes of Old Eng- land " are the best homes upon earth.' ' The most candid and sensible of all modern French tra- vellers,' said Beauclerc, 'was particularly struck with the superiority of our English country residences, and the comfort of our homes.' 'You mean M. de Stael.?' said the General; 'true English sense in that book, I allow.' When the General and Beauclerc did agree in opinion about 105 HELEN a book, which was not a circumstance of frequent occurrence, they were mutually delighted ; one always feeling the value of the other's practical sense, and the other then acknowledging that literature is good for something. Beauclerc, in the fulness of his heart and abundance of his words, began to expatiate on M. de Stael's merits, in having better than any foreigner understood the actual workings and balances of the British constitution, that constitution so much talked of abroad, and so little understood. ' So little understood anywhere,' said the General. Reasonably as Beauclerc now spoke, Helen formed a new idea of his capacity, and began to think more respectfully even of his common sense, than when she had heard him in the Beltravers cause. He spoke of the causes of England's pros- perity, the means by which she maintains her superiority among nations — her equal laws and their just administration. He observed that the hope which every man bom in England, even in the lowest station, may have of rising by his own merits to the highest eminence, forms the great spring of in- dustry and talent. He agreed with the intelligent foreigner's observation, that the aristocracy of talent is superior in England to the aristocracy of birth. The General seemed to demur at the word superior, drew himself up, but said nothing in contradiction. ' Industry, and wealth, and education, and fashion, all emulous, act in England beneficially on each other,' continued Beauclerc. The General sat at ease again. ' And above all,' pursued Beauclerc, — ' above all, educa- tion and the diffusion of knowledge ' ' Knowledge — yes, but take care of what kind,' said his guardian. ' All kinds are good,' said Beauclerc. ' No, only such as are safe,' said the General. The march of intellect was not a favourite march with him, unless the step were perfectly kept, and all in good time. But now, on passing a projecting bend in the wood, they came within sight of a place in melancholy contrast to all they had just admired. A park of considerable extent, absolutely bereft of trees, except a few ragged firs on each side of a large dilapidated mansion on the summit of a bleak hill : it seemed as if a great wood had once been there. 1 06 HELEN ' Old Forest ! ' exclaimed the General ; < Old Forest, now no more ! Many a happy hour, when I was a boy, have I spent shooting in those woods,' and he pointed to where in- numerable stumps of trees, far as the eye could reach, marked where the forest had once stood : some of the white circles on the ground showed the magnificent size of those newly felled. Beauclerc was quite silent. The General led the way on to the great gate of entrance : the porter's lodge was in ruins. A huge rusty padlock hung upon one of the gates, which had been dragged half open, but, the hinge having sunk, there it stuck — ^the gate could not be opened further. The other could not be stirred without imminent hazard of bringing down the pier on which it hung, and which was so crazy, the groom said, 'he was afraid, if he shook it never so little, all would come down together.' ' Let it alone,' said the General, in the tone of one re- solved to be patient ; ' there is room enough for us to get in one by one — Miss Stanley, do not be in a hurry, if you please ; follow me quietly.' In they filed. The avenue, overgrown with grass, would have been difficult to find, but for deep old cart-ruts which still marked the way. But soon, fallen trees, and lopped branches, dragged many a rood and then left there, made it difficult to pass. And there lay exposed the white bodies of many a noble tree, some wholly, some half, stripped of their bark, some green in decay, left to the weather — and every here and there little smoking pyramids of burning charcoal. As they approached the house — 'How changed,' said the General, ' from that once cheerful hospitable mansion ! ' It was a melancholy example of a deserted home : the plaster dropping off, the cut stone green, the windows broken, the shutters half shut, the way to the hall-door steps blocked up. They were forced to go round through the yards. Coach- houses and stables, grand ranges, now all dilapidated. Only one yelping cur in the great kennel. The back-door being ajar, the General pushed it open, and they went in, and on to the great kitchen, where they found in the midst of wood smoke one little old woman, whom they nearly scared out of her remaining senses. She stood and stared. Beauclerc stepped towards her to explain ; but she was deaf ; he raised 107 HELEN his voice — in vain. She was made to comprehend by the General, whose voice, known in former times, reached her heart — ' that they only came to see the place.' ' See the place ! ah ! a sad sight to see.' Her eyes re- verted to Beauclerc, and, conceiving that he was the young lord himself, she waxed pale, and her head shook fearfully ; but, when relieved from this mistake, she went forward to show them over the house. As they proceeded up the great staircase, she confided to her friend, the General, that she was glad it was not the young lord, for she was told he was a fiery man, and she dreaded his coming unawares. Lady Cecilia asked if she did not know him. No, she had never seen him since he was a little fellow ; ' he has been always roaming about, like the rest, in foreign parts, and has never set foot in the place since he came to man's estate.' As the General passed a window on the landing-place, he looked out. ' You are missing the great elm, sir. Ah ! I remember you here, a boy ; you was, always good. It was the young lord ordered specially the cutting of that, which I could not stomach ; the last of the real old trees ! Well, well ! I'm old and foolish— I'm old and foolish, and I should not talk.' But still she talked on, and as this seemed her only comfort, they would not check her garrulity. In the hope that they were come to take the house, she now bustled as well as she could, to show all to the best advantage, but bad was the best now, as she sorrowfully said. She was very unwilling that the gentlemen should go up to inspect the roof They went, however ; and the General saw and estimated, and Beauclerc saw and hoped. The General, recollecting the geography of the house, ob- served that she had not shown them what used to be the picture-gallery, which looked out on the terrace ; he desired to see it. She reluctantly obeyed ; and, after trying sundry impossible keys, repeating all the while that her heart was broke, that she wished it had pleased God never to give her a heart, unlock the door she could not in her trepidation. Beauclerc gently took the keys from her, and looked so com- passionately upon her, that she God-blessed him, and thought io8 HELEN it a pity her young lord was not like him ; and while he dealt with the lock, Lady Cecilia, saying they would trouble her no further, slipped into her hand what she thought would be some comfort. The poor old creature thanked her ladyship, but said gold could be of no use to her now in life ; she should soon let the parish bury her, and be no cost to the young lord. She could forgive many things, she said, but she could never forgive him for parting with the old pictures. She turned away as the gallery-door opened. One only old daub of a grandmother was there ; all the rest had been sold, and their vacant places remained discoloured on the walls. There were two or three dismembered old chairs, the richly-dight windows broken, the floor rat- eaten. The General stood and looked, and did not sigh, but absolutely groaned. They went to the shattered glass door, which looked out upon the terrace — that terrace which had cost thousands of pounds to raise, and he called Cecilia to show her the place where the youngsters used to play, and to point out some of his favourite haunts. ' It is most melancholy to see a family-place so gone to ruin,' said Beauclerc ; 'if it strikes us so much, what must it be to the son of this family, to come back to the house of his ancestors, and find it thus desolate ! Poor Beltravers ! ' The expression of the General's eye changed. ' I am sure you must pity him, my dear General,' con- tinued Beauclerc. ' I might, had he done anything to prevent, or had he done less to hasten, this ruin.' ' How ? he should not have cut down the trees, do you mean ? — but it was to pay his father's debts ' ' And his own,' said the General. ' He told me his father's, sir.' ' And I tell you his own.' ' Even so,' said Beauclerc, ' debts are not crimes for which we ought to shut the gates of mercy on our fellow-creatures — and so young a man as Beltravers, left to himself, without a home, his family abroad, no parent, no friend — no guardian friend.' ' But what is it you would do, Beauclerc ? ' said the General. 'What you must wish to be done,' said Beauclerc. 109 HELEN ' Repair this ruin, restore this once hospitable mansion, and put it in the power of the son to be what his ancestors have been.' ' But how — my dear Beauclerc ? Tell me plainly — how ? ' ' Plainly, I would lend him money enough to make this house fit to live in.' ' And he would never repay you, and would never live in it.' ' He would, sir — he promised me he would.' ' Promised you ! ' ' And I promised him that I would lend him the money.' ' Promised ! Beauclerc ? Without your guardian's know- ledge ? Pray, how much ' ' Confound me if I remember the words. The sense was, what would do the business ; what would make the house fit for him and his sisters to live in.' ' Ten thousand ! — fifteen thousand would not do.' ' Well, sir. You know what will be necessary better than I do. A few thousands more or less, what signifies, provided a friend be well served ? The superfluous money accumulated during my long minority cannot be better employed.' ' All that I have been saving for you with such care from the time your father died ! ' ' My dear guardian, my dear friend, do not think me ungrateful ; but the fact is, — in short, ray happiness does not depend, never can depend, upon money ; as my friend, there- fore, I beseech you to consider my moneyed interest less, and my happiness more.' ' Beauclerc, you do not know what your happiness is. One hour you tell me it is one thing, the next another. What is become of the plan for the new house you wanted to build for yourself ? 1 must have common sense for you, Beauclerc, as you have none for yourself. I shall not give you this money for Lord Beltravers.' ' You forget, sir, that I told you I had promised.' ' You forget, Beauclerc, that I told you that such a promise, vague and absurd in itself, made without your guardian's concurrence or consent, is absolutely null and void.' ' Null and void in law, perhaps it may be,' cried Beauclerc ; 'but for that very reason, in honour, the stronger, the more binding", and I am speaking to a man of honour.' HELEN ' To one who can take care of his own honour,' said the General. ' And of mine, I trust.' ' You do well to trust it, as your father did, to me : it shall not be implicated ' ' When once I am of age,' interrupted Beauclerc. ' You will do as you please,' said the General. ' In the meantime I shall do my duty.' ' But, sir, I only ask you to let me lend this money.' ' Lend — nonsense ! lend to a man who cannot give any security.' ' Security ! ' said Beauclerc, with a look of unutterable contempt. ' When a friend is in distress, to talk to him like an attorney, of security! Do, pray, sir, spare me that. I would rather give the money at once.' ' I make no doubt of it ; then at once I say No, sir.' ' No, sir ! and why do you say no ? ' ' Because I think it my duty, and nothing I have heard has at all shaken my opinion.' ' Opinion ! and so I am to be put down by opinion, with- out any reason ! ' cried Beauclerc. Then trying to command his temper, ' But tell me, my dear General, why I cannot have this cursed money ? ' ' Because, my dear Beauclerc, I am your guardian, and can say no, and can adhere to a refusal as firmly as any man living, when it is necessary.' ' Yes, and when it is unnecessary. General Clarendon, ac- cording to your own estimate, fifteen thousand pounds is the utmost sum requisite to put this house in a habitable state — by that sum I abide ! ' ' Abide ! ' ' Yes, I require it, to keep my promise to Beltravers, and have it I must.' ' Not from me.' ' From some one else then, for have it I will.' ' Dearest Clarendon,' whispered Lady Cecilia, ' let him have it, since he has promised ' Without seeming to hear her whisper, without a muscle of his countenance altering, General Clarendon repeated, ' Not from me.' ' From some one else then — I can.' HELEN ' Not while I have power to prevent.' ' Power ! power ! power ! Yes, that is what you love, above all things and all persons, and I tell you plainly. General Clarendon,' pursued Beauclerc, too angry to heed or see Lady Cecilia's remonstrating looks, ' at once I tell you that you have not the power. You had it. It is past and gone. The power of affection you had, if not of reason ; but force, General Clarendon, despotism, can never govern me. I submit to no man's mere will, much less to any man's sheer obstinacy.' At the word obstinacy, the General's face, which was before rigid, grew hard as iron. Beauclerc walked up and down the room with great strides, and as he strode he went on talking to himself. ' To be kept from the use of my own money, treated like a child — an idiot — at my time of life ! Not considered at years of discretion, when other men of the meanest capacity, by the law of the land, can do what they please with their own property ! By heavens ! — that will of my father's ' ' Should be respected, my dear Granville, since it was your father's will,' said Lady Cecilia, joining him as he walked. ' And respect ' He stopped short. ' My dear Lady Cecilia, for your sake ' he tried to restrain himself. ' Till this moment never did I say one disrespectful word to General Clarendon. I always considered him as the representative of my father ; and when most galled I have borne the chains in which it was my father's pleasure to leave me. Few men of my age would have so submitted to a guardian not many years older than himself.' ' Yes, and indeed that should be considered,' said Lady Cecilia, turning to the General. ' I have always considered General Clarendon more as my friend than my guardian.' ' And have found him so, I had hoped,' said the General, relaxing in tone but not in looks. ' I have never treated you, sir, as some wards treat their guardians. I have dealt openly, as man of honour to man of honour, gentleman to gentleman, friend to friend.' ' Acknowledged, and felt by me, Beauclerc' ' Then now, my dear Clarendon, grant the only request of HELEN any consequence I ever made you — say yes.' Beauclerc trembled with impatience. ' No,' said the General, ' I have said it — No.' The gallery rang with the sound. ' No ! ' repeated Beauclerc. Each walked separately up and down the room, speaking without listening to what the other said. Helen heard an offer from Beauclerc, to which she extremely wished that the General had listened. But he was deaf with determination not to yield to anything Beauclerc could say further ; the noise of passion in their ears was too great for either of them to hear the other. Suddenly turning, Beauclerc exclaimed, — ' Borne with me, do you say ? 'Tis I that have to bear — and by heavens ! ' cried he, ' more than I can — than I will — bear. Before to-morrow's sun goes down I will have the money.' ' From whom ? ' 'From any money-lending Jew — usurer — extortioner — cheat — rascal — whatever he be. You drive me to it — you — you my friend — you, with whom I have dealt so openly ; and to the last it shall be open. To no vile indirections will I stoop. I tell you, my guardian, that if you deny me my own, I will have what I want from the Jews.' ' Easily,' said his guardian. ' But first, recollect that a clause in your father's will, in such case, sends his estates to your cousin Venables.' 'To my cousin Venables let them go — all — all; if such be your pleasure, sir, be it so. The lowest man on earth that has feehng keeps his promise. The slave has a right to his word ! Ruin me if you will, and as soon as you please ; disgrace me you cannot ; bend my spirit you cannot ; ruin in any shape I will meet, rather than submit to such a guardian, such a ' Tyrant he was on the point of saying, but Lady Cecilia stopped that word by suddenly seizing upon his arm : forcibly she carried him off, saying, ' Come out with me on the terrace, Granville, and recover your senses.' ' My senses ! I have never lost them ; never was cooler in my life,' said he, kicking open the glass door upon its first resistance, and shattering its remaining panes to fragments. I 113 HELEN Unnoticing, not hearing the crash, the General stood leaning his elbow on the mantelpiece, and covering his eyes with his hand. Helen remained near him, scarce breathing loud enough to be heard ; he did not know she was there, and he repeated aloud, in an accent of deep feeling, ' Tyrant ! from Beau- clerc ! ' A sigh from Helen made him aware of her presence, and, as he removed his hand from his eyes, she saw his look was more in sorrow than in anger : she said softly, ' Mr. Beauclerc was wrong, very wrong, but he was in a passion, he did not know what he meant.' There was silence for a few moments. ' You are right, I believe,' said the General, ' it was heat of anger ' ' To which the best are subject,' said Helen, ' and the best and kindest most easily forgive.' ' But Beauclerc said some things which were ' ' Unpardonable — only forget them ; let all be forgotten.' ' Yes,' said the General, ' all but my determination ; that, observe, is fixed. My mind. Miss Stanley, is made up, and, once made up, it is not to be changed.' ' I am certain of that,' said Helen, ' but I am not clear that your mind is made up.' The General looked at her with astonishment. 'Your refusal is not irrevocable.' ' You do not know me, Miss Stanley.' ' I think I do.' ' Better than I know myself ? ' ' Yes, better, if you do yourself the injustice to think that you would not yield, if it were right to do so. At this very instant,' pursued Helen, disregarding his increasing astonish- ment, ' you would yield if you could reasonably, honourably — would not you ? If you could without injury to your ward's fortune or character, would you not ? Surely it is for his good only that you are so resolute ? ' ' Certainly ! ' He waited with eyes fixed, bending forward, but with intensity of purpose in his calmness of attention. ' There was something which I heard Mr. Beauclerc say, which, I think, escaped your attention,' said Helen. ' When you spoke of the new house he intended to build for himself, which was to cost so much, he offered to give that up.' ' I never heard that offer.' 114 HELEN ' I heard him,' said Helen, ' I assure you : it was when you were both walking up and down the room.' ' This may be so, I was angry then^ said the General. ' But you are not angry now,' said Helen. He smiled, and in truth he desired nothing more than an honourable loophole — a safe way of coming off without injury to his ward — without hurting his own pride, or derogating from the dignity of guardian. Helen saw this, and, thanking him for his condescension, his kindness, in listening to her, she hastened as quickly as possible, lest the relenting moment Jhight not be seized ; and running out on the terrace, she saw Beauclerc, his head down upon his arms, leaning upon an old broken stone lion, and Lady Cecilia standing beside him, commiserating ; and as she approached, she heard her persuading him to go to the General, and speak to him again, and say so — only say so. Whatever it was, Helen did not stay to inquire, but told Cecilia, in as few words as she could, all that she had to say ; and ended with ' Was I right ? ' ' Quite right, was not she, Granville ? ' Beauclerc looked up — a gleam of hope and joy came across his face, and, with one grateful look to Helen, he darted forward. They followed, but could not keep pace with him ; and when they reached the gallery, they found him appealing, as to a father, for pardon. ' Can you forgive, and will you ? ' ' Forgive my not hearing you, not listening to you, as your father would ? My dear Beauclerc, you were too hot, and I was too cold ; and there is an end of it.' This reconciliation was as quick, as warm, as the quarrel had been. And then explanations were made, as satisfactorily as they are when the parties are of good understanding, and depend on each other's truth, past, present, and future. Beauclerc, whose promise all relied on, and for reasons good, none more implicitly than the General, promised that he would ask for no more than just what would do to put this Old Forest house in habitable trim ; he said he would give up the new house for himself, till as many thousands as he now lent, spent, or wasted — take which word you vnll — should be again accumu- lated from his income. It was merely a sacrifice of his own vanity, and perhaps a httle of his own comfort, he said, to save a friend, a human being, from destruction. IIS S/ie saw Seaucierc leaning upon an old irolcen stone lion^ and Lady Cecilia standing beside him. HELEN ' Well, well, let it rest so.' It was all settled, witness present — ' two angels to witness,' as Beauclerc quoted from some old play. And now in high good-humour, up again to nonsense pitch, they all felt that delightful relief of spirits, of which friends, after perilous quarrel, are sensible in perfect reconciliation. They left this melancholy mansion now, with Beauclerc the happiest of the happy, in the generous hope that he should be the restorer of its ancient glories and comfort. The poor old woman was not forgotten as they passed, she courtesying, hoping, and fearing : Lady Cecilia whispered, and the deaf ear heard, ' The roof will not fall — all will be well : and there is the man that will do it all.' 'Well, well, my heart inclined to him from the first — at least from the minute I knew him not to be my young lord.' They were to go home by water. The boat was in readiness, and, as Beauclerc carefully handed Helen into it, the General said — ' Yes, you are right to take care of Miss Stanley, Beauclerc ; she is a good friend in need, at least, as I have found this morning,' added he, as he seated himself beside her. Lady Cecilia was charming, and everything was delightful, especially the cold chicken. CHAPTER XI No two people could be more unlike in their habits of mind than this guardian and ward. General Clarendon referred in all cases to old experience, and dreaded innovation ; Beauclerc took for his motto, ' My mind leadeth me to new things.' General Clarendon was what is commonly called a practical man ; Granville Beauclerc was the flower of theorists. The General, fit for action, prompt and decided in all his judgments, was usually right and just in his conclusions — but if wrong, there was no setting him right ; for he not only would not, but could not, go back over the ground — he could not give in words any explanation of his process of reasoning — it was enough for him that it was right, and that it was his; while Beauclerc, who cared not for any man's opinion, was always so ingeniously 117 HELEN wrong, and could show all the steps of his reasoning so plausibly, that it was a pity he should be quite out of the right road at last. The General hated metaphysics, because he considered them as taking a flight beyond the reach of discipline, as well as of common sense : he continually asked, of what use are they ? While Lady Davenant answered, — ' To invigorate and embellish the understanding. " This turning the soul inward on itself concentrates its forces, and fits it for the strongest and boldest flights ; and in such pursuits, whether we take or whether we lose the game, the chase is certainly of service." ' Possibly, the General said ; he would not dispute the point with Lady Davenant, but a losing chase, however invigorating, was one in which he never wished to engage : as to the rest, he altogether hated discussions, doubts, and questionings. He had 'made up his fagot of opinions,' and would not let one be drawn out for examination, lest he should loosen the bundle. Beauclerc, on the contrary, had his dragged out and scat- tered about every day, and each particular stick was tried,''and bent, and twisted, this way and that, and peeled, and cut, and hacked ; and unless they proved sound to the very core, not a twig of them should ever go back into his bundle, which was to be the bundle of bundles, the best that ever was seen, when once tied so that it would hold together — of which there seemed little likelihood, as every knot slipped, and all fell to pieces at each pull. While he was engaged in this analysis, he was, as his guardian thought, in great moral peril, for not a principle had he left to bless himself with ; and, in any emergency, if any temptation should occur, what was to become of him ? The General, who was very fond of him, but also strongly attached to his own undeviating rule of right, was upon one occasion about peremptorily to interpose, not only with remonstrances as a friend, but with authority as a guardian. This occurred when Beauclerc was with them at Florence, and when the General's love for Lady Cecilia, and intimacy with her mother, commenced. Lady Davenant, being much interested for young Beauclerc, begged that the patient might be left to her, and that his guardian would refrain from inter- ference. This was agreed to the more readily by the General, as his thoughts and feelings were then more agreeably engrossed, ii8 HELEN and Beauclerc found in Lady Davenant the very friend he wanted and wished for most ardently — one whose mind would not blench at any moral danger, would never shrink from truth in any shape, but, calm and self-possessed, would examine whether it were indeed truth, or only a phantom assuming her form. Besides, there was in Lady Davenant towards Beau- clerc a sort of maternal solicitude and kindness, of which the effect was heightened by her dignified manner and pride of character. She, in the first place, listened to him patiently ; she, who could talk, would listen : this was, as she said, her first merit in his estimation. To her he poured forth all those doubts, of which she was wise enough not to make crimes : she was sure of his honourable intentions, certain that there was no underhand motive, no bad passion, no concealed vice, or disposition to vice, beneath his boasted freedom from prejudice, to be justified or to be indulged by getting rid of the restraints of principle. Had there been any danger of this sort, which with young men who profess themselves ultra- liberal is usually the case, she would have joined in his guardian's apprehensions ; but in fact Beauclerc, instead of being ' le philosophe sans le savoir,' was ' le bon enfant sans le savoir' ; for, while he questioned the rule of right in all his principles, and while they were held in abeyance, his good habits and good natural disposition held fast and stood him in stead ; while Lady Davenant, by slow degrees, brought him to define his terms, and presently to see that he had been merely saying old things in new words, and that the systems which had dazzled him as novelties were old to older eyes ; in short, that he was merely a resurrectionist of obsolete heresies, which had been gone over and over again at various long- past periods, and over and over again abandoned by the common sense of mankind: so that, after puzzling and wandering a weary way in the dark labyrinth he had most ingeniously made for himself, he saw light, followed it, and at length, making his way out, was surprised, and sorry perhaps, to perceive that it was the common light of day. It is of great consequence to young enthusiastic tyros, like Beauclerc, to have safe friends to whom they can talk of their opinions privately, otherwise they will talk their ingenious nonsense publicly, and so they bind themselves, or are bound, to the stake, and live or die martyrs to their own follies. 119 HELEN From these and all such dangers Lady Davenant protected him, and she took care that nobody hurt him in his defenceless state, before his shell was well formed and hardened. She was further of peculiar service in keeping all safe and smooth between the ward and guardian. All Beauclerc's romance the General would have called by the German word ' Schwdr- merey,' — not fudge — not humbug — literally 'sky-rocketing' — visionary enthusiasm ; and when it came to arguments, they might have turned to quarrels, but for Lady Davenant's superior influence, while Lady Cecilia's gentleness and gaiety usually succeeded in putting all serious dangerous thoughts to flight. Nature never having intended Lady Cecilia for a manoeuvrer, she was now perpetually on the point of betraying herself; and one day, when she was alone with Helen, she exclaimed, ' Never was anything better managed than I managed this, my dear Helen ! I am so glad I told you ' Recollecting herself just in time, she ended with, ' so glad I told you the truth.' ' Oh yes ! thank you,' said Helen. ' My uncle used to say no one could be a good friend who does not tell the whole truth.' ' That I deny,' thought Cecilia. The twinge of conscience was felt but very slightly ; not visible in any change of counte- nance, except by a quick twinkling motion of the eyelashes, not noticed by unsuspicious Helen. Everything now went on as happily as Cecilia could have desired ; every morning they rode or boated to Old Forest to see what was doing. The roof was rather hastily taken off ; Lady Cecilia hurried forward that measure, aware that it would prevent the possibility of any of the ladies of the family coming there for some time. Delay was all she wanted, and she would now, as she promised herself, leave the rest to time. She would never interfere further in word or look, especially when her mother might be by. One half of this promise she kept faithfully, the other she broke continually. There were plans to be made of all the alterations and improvements at Old Forest. Beauclerc applied to Lady Ceciha for her advice and assistance. Her advice she gave, but her assistance she ingeniously contrived to leave to Helen ; for whenever Beauclerc brought to her a sketch or a plan of 120 HELEN what was to be done, Lady Cecilia immediately gave it to Helen, repeating, ' Never drew a regular plan in my life, you know, my dear, you must do this ' ; so that Helen's pencil and her patience were in constant requisition. Then came apologies from Beauclerc, and regrets at taking up her time, all which led to an intimacy that Lady Cecilia took care to keep up by frequent visits to Old Forest, so that Helen was necessarily joined in all his present pursuits. During one of these visits they were looking over some old furniture which Lord Beltravers had commissioned Beauclerc to have disposed of at some neighbouring auction. There was one curiously-carved oak arm-chair, belonging to ' the old old gentleman of all ' which the old woman particularly regretted should go. She had sewn it up in a carpet, and when it came out, Helen was struck with its likeness to a favourite chair of her uncle's ; many painful recollections occurred to her, and tears came into her eyes. Ashamed of what appeared so like affectation, she turned away, that her tears might not be seen, and when Cecilia, following her, insisted on knowing what was the matter, she left Helen immediately to the old woman, and took the opportunity of telling Beauclerc all about Dean Stanley, and how Helen was an heiress and no heiress, and her having determined to give up all her fortune to pay her uncle's debts. There was a guardian, too, in the case, who would not consent ; and, in short, a parallelism of circum- stances, a similarity of generous temper, and all this she thought must interest Beauclerc — and so it did. But yet its being told to him would have gone against his nice notions of delicacy, and Helen would have been ruined in his opinion had he conceived that it had been revealed to him with her consent and connivance. She came back before Lady Cecilia had quite finished, and a few words which she heard made her aware of the whole. The blush of astonishment — the glance of indignation — which she gave at Lady Cecilia, settled Beauclerc's opinion ; and Cecilia was satisfied that she had done her friend good service against her will ; and as to the means thought she — what signifies going back to consider when they succeed ? The Collingwoods gladly availed themselves of Lady Cecilia Clarendon's kind invitation, as they were both most anxious to take leave of Helen Stanley before their departure. They HELEN were to sail very soon, so that their visit was but short ; a few days of painful pleasure to Helen — a happy meeting, but enjoyed with the mournful sense that they were so soon to separate, and for so long a time ; perhaps for ever. Mr. Collingwood told Helen that if she still agreed to his conditions, he would arrange with Mr. James, the solicitor, that all the money left to her by her uncle should be appro- priated to the payment of his debts. ' But,' continued he, ' pause and consider well, whether you can do without this money, which is still yours ; you are, you know, not bound by any promise, and it is not yet too late to say you have altered your decision.' Helen smiled and said, ' You cannot be serious in saying this, I am sure.' Mr. Collingwood assured her that he was. Helen simply said that her determination was unalterable. He looked pleased, yet his last words in taking leave of her were, ' Remember, my dear, that when you have given away your fortune, you cannot live as if you had it.' The CoUingwoods departed ; and, after a decent time had elapsed, or what she deemed a decent time, Lady Cecilia was anxious to ascertain what progress had been made ; how, relatively to each other. Lady Blanche Forrester and Helen stood in Beauclerc's opinion, or rather in his imagination. But this was not quite so easy a matter to determine as she had conceived it would be, judging from the frankness of Beauclerc's temper, and from the terms of familiarity on which they had lived while abroad. His confidence was not to be won, surprised, or forced. He was not only jealous of his free will, as most human beings are in love affairs, but, like all men of true feeling, he desired in these matters perfect mental privacy. When Psyche is awakened, it should be by Cupid alone. Beauclerc did not yet wish that she should be awakened. He admired, he enjoyed that repose : he was charmed by the per- fect confiding simplicity of Helen's mind, so unlike what he had seen in others — so real. The hope of that pure friend- ship which dawned upon him he wished to prolong, and dreaded lest, by any doubt raised, all might be clouded and changed. Lady Cecilia was, however, convinced that, without knowing it, he was falling comfortably in love through friend- ship ; a very easy convenient way. HELEN And Helen, had she too set out upon that easy convenient road of friendship ? She did not think about the road, but she felt that it was very agreeable, and thought it was quite safe, as she went on so smoothly and easily. She could not consider Mr. Beauclerc as a new acquaintance, because she had heard so much about him. He was completely one of the family, so that she, as part of that family, could not treat him as a stranger. Her happiness, she was sensible, had much increased since his arrival ; but so had everybody's. He gave a new spring, a new interest, to everything ; added so much to the life of life ; his sense and his nonsense were each of them good in their kind ; and they were of various kinds, from the high sublime of metaphysics to the droll realities of life. But everybody blaming, praising, scolding, laughing at, or with him, he was necessary to all, and with all, for some reason or other, a favourite. But the General was always as impatient as Lady Cecilia herself both of his hypercriticism and of his never-ending fancies, each of which Beauclerc pursued with an eagerness and abandoned with a facihty which sorely tried the General's equanimity. One day, after having ridden to Old Forest, General Cla- rendon returned chafed. He entered the library, talking to Cecilia, as Helen thought, about his horse. ' No managing him ! Curb him ever so little, and he is on his hind-legs directly. Give him his head, put the bridle on his neck, and he stands still ; does not know which way he would go, or what he would do. The strangest fellow for a rational creature.' Now it was clear it was of Beauclerc that he spoke. ' So rash and yet so resolute,' continued the General. ' How is that ? ' said Lady Davenant. ' I do not know how, but so it is,' said the General. ' As you know,' appealing to Helen and to Lady Cecilia, ' he was ready to run me through till he had his own way about that confounded old house ; and now there are all the workmen at a stand, because Mr. Beauclerc cannot decide what he will have done or undone.' 'Oh, it is my fault!' cried Helen, with the guilty re- collection of the last alteration not having been made yesterday in drawing the working plan, and she hastened to look for it 123 HELEN directly ; but when she found it, she saw to her dismay that Beauclerc had scribbled it all over with literary notes ; it was in no state to meet the General's eye ; she set about copying it as fast as possible. ' Yes,' pursued the General ; ' forty alterations — shuffling about continually. Cannot a man be decided .^ ' ' Always with poor Beauclerc,' said Lady Cecilia, ' le mieux est tennemi dii bzen.' ' No, my dear Cecilia, it is all his indolence ; there he sat with a book in his hand all yesterday ! with all his impetuosity, too indolent to stir in his own business,' said the General. ' His mind is too active sometimes to allow his body to stir,' said Lady Davenant ; ' and because he cannot move the universe, he will not stir his little finger.' ' He is very fond of paradoxes, and your ladyship is very fond of him,' said the General ; ' but indolent he is ; and as to activity of mind, it is only in pursuit of his own fancies.' 'And your fancies and his differ,' said Lady Davenant. ' Because he never fancies anything useful,' said the General. ' Cest selon ! c'est selon ! ' cried Lady Cecilia gaily ; ' he thinks his fancies useful, and especially all he is doing at Old Forest ; but I confess he tends most to the agreeable. Cer- tainly he is a most agreeable creature.' ' Agreeable ! satisfied to be called an agreeable man ! ' cried the General indignantly ; ' yes, he has no ambition.' ' There I differ from you. General,' said Lady Davenant ; ' he has too much : have patience with him ; he is long-sighted in his visions of glory.' ' Visions indeed ! ' said the General. ' Those who are really ambitious,' continued Lady Davenant, ' must think before they act. " What shall I do to be for ever known ? " is a question which deserves at least a little more thought than those which most young men ask themselves, which commonly are, " What shall I do to be known to-morrow — on the Turf or at Brooks's — or in Doctors' Commons — or at some exclusive party at charming Lady Nobody's ? " ' ' What will you do for the plan for these workmen in the meantime, my dear Clarendon ? ' said Lady Cecilia, afraid that some long discussion would ensue. ' Here it is ! ' said Helen, who had managed to get it ready while they were talking. She gave it to the General, Avho 124 HELEN thanked her, and was off directly. Cecilia then came to divert herself with looking at Beauclerc's scribbled plan, and she read the notes aloud for her mother's amusement. It was a sketch of a dramatical, metaphysical, entertainment, of which half a dozen proposed titles had been scratched out, and there was finally left 'Tarquin the Optimist, or the Temple of Destiny.' It was from an old story begun by Laurentius Valla, and continued by Leibnitz ; — she read, ' " Act i. Scene 1. Sexttis Tarquin goes to consult the Oracle, who foretells the crime he is to commit." ' And then,' cried Lady Cecilia, ' come measures of old and new front of Old Forest house, wings included. Now he goes on with his play. ' " Tarquin! s complaint to Jupiter of the Oracle — Modern Predestination compared to Ancient Destiity.'' ' And here,' continued Cecilia, ' come prices of Norway deal and a great blot, and then we have "Jupiter's answer that Sextus may avoid his doom, if he pleases, by staying away from. Rome; but he does not please to do so, because he -must then renounce the crown. Good speech here on vanity., and in- consistency of human wishes." ' " Kitchen 23 ft. by 2i. Query with hobs .?" ' I cannot conceive, my dear Helen,' continued Lady Cecilia, 'how you could make the drawing out through all this,' and she continued to read, ' " Scene yd. ' " High Priest of Delphi asks Jupiter why he did not give Sextus a better will ? — why not make him choose to give up the crown, rather than com7nit the crime f Jupiter refuses to answer, and sends the High Priest to consult Minerva at Athens'' ' " N.B. Old woman at Old Forest, promised her an oven," — " Leibnitz gives " ' Oh ! if he goes to Leibnitz,' said Lady Cecilia, ' he will be too grand for me, but it will do for you, mamma. ' " Leibnitz gives in his Temple of the Destinies a repre- sentation of every possible universe from the worst to the best — This could not be done on the stage." 'Very true indeed,' said Lady Cecilia, 'but, Helen, listen, Granville has really found an ingenious resource. ' " By Ombres Chinoises, suppose; or a gauze curtain, as in 125 HELEN Zemire et Azore, the audience might be made to understand the main point, that GOOD resulted from Targuin's BAD choice. Brutus, Liberty, Rotne's grandeur, and the Optimist right at last. Q.E.D." ' Well, well,' continued Lady Cecilia, ' I don't understand it ; but I understand this, — " Bricks wanting." ' Lady Davenant smiled at this curious specimen of Beauclerc's versatility, but said, ' I fear he will fritter away his powers on a hundred dififerent petty objects, and do nothing at last worthy of his abilities. He will scatter and divide the light of his genius, and show us every change of the prismatic colours — curious and beautiful to behold, but dispersing, wasting the light he should concentrate on some one, some noble object.' ' But if he has light enough for little objects and great too ? ' said Lady Cecilia, ' I allow, quHl faudrait plus dun C(xur pour aimer tant de choses d, la fois ; but as I really think Granville has more heart than is necessary, he can well afford to waste some of it, even on the old woman at Old Forest.' CHAPTER XII One evening, Helen was looking over a beautiful scrap-book of Lady Cecilia's. Beauclerc, who had stood by for some time, eyeing it in rather scornful silence, at length asked whether Miss Stanley was a lover of albums and autographs. Helen had no album of her own, she said, but she was curious always to see the autographs of celebrated people. 'Why?' said Beauclerc. ' I don't know. It seems to bring one nearer to them. It gives more reality to our imagination of them perhaps,' said Helen. ' The imagination is probably in most cases better than the reality,' replied he. Lady Davenant stooped over Helen's shoulder to look at the handwriting of the Earl of Essex — the writing of the gallant Earl of Essex, at sight of which, as she observed, the hearts of queens have beat high. ' What a crowd of associated 126 HELEN ideas rise at the sight of that autograph ! who can look at it without some emotion ? ' Helen could not. Beauclerc in a tone of raillery said he was sure, from the eager interest Miss Stanley took in these autographs, that she would in time become a collector herself; and he did not doubt that he should see her with a valuable museum, in which should be preserved the old pens of great men, that of Cardinal Chigi, for instance, who boasted that he wrote with the same pen for fifty years. ' And by that boast you know,' said Lady Davenant, ' convinced the Cardinal de Retz that he was not a great, but a very little man. We will not have that pen in Helen's museum.' ' Why not ? ' Beauclerc asked ; ' it was full as well worth having as many of the relics to be found in most young ladies' and even old gentlemen's museums. It was quite sufficient whether a man had been great or little that he had been talked of, — that he had been something of a lion — to make anything belonging to him valuable to collectors, who pre- serve and worship even " the parings of lions' claws." ' That class of indiscriminate collectors Helen gave up to his ridicule ; still he was not satisfied. He went on to the whole class of " lion-hunters," as he called them, condemning indis- criminately all those who were anxious to see celebrated people ; he hoped Miss Stanley was not one of that class. ' No, not a lion-hunter,' said Helen ; she hoped she never should be one of that set, but she confessed she had a great desire to see and to know distinguished persons, and she hoped that this sort of curiosity, or, as she would rather call it, enthusiasm, was not ridiculous, and did not deserve to be confounded with the mere trifling vulgar taste for sight-seeing and lion-hunting. Beauclerc half smiled, but, not answering immediately, Lady Davenant said that for her part she did not consider such enthusiasm as ridiculous ; on the contrary, she liked it, especially in young people. ' I consider the warm admiration of talent and virtue in youth as a promise of future excellence in maturer age.' ' And yet,' said Beauclerc, ' the maxim " not to admire " is, I beheve, the most approved in philosophy, and in practice is the great secret of happiness in this world.' 127 HELEN ' In the fine world, it is a fine air, I know,' said Lady Davenant. ' Among a set of fashionable young somnambulists it is doubtless the only art they know to make men happy or to keep them so ; but this has nothing to do with philosophy, Beauclerc, though it has to do with conceit or affectation.' Mr. Beauclerc, now piqued, with a look and voice of repressed feeling, said that he hoped her ladyship did not include him among that set of fashionable somnambulists. ' I hope you will not include yourself in it,' answered Lady Davenant ; ' it is contrary to your nature, and if you join the nil admirari coxcombs, it can be only for fashion's sake — mere affectation.' Beauclerc made no reply, and Lady Davenant, turning to Helen, told her that several celebrated people were soon to come to Clarendon Park, and congratulated her upon the pleasure she would have in seeing them. ' Besides being a great pleasure, it is a real advantage,' continued she, ' to see and be acquainted early in life with superior people. It enables one to form a standard of excellence, and raises that standard high and bright. In men, the enthusiasm becomes glorious ambition to excel in arts or arms ; in women, it refines and elevates the taste, and is so far a preventive against frivolous, vulgar company, and all their train of follies and vices. I can speak from my own recollection, of the great happiness it was to me, when I early in life became acquainted with some of the illustrious of my day.' ' And may I ask,' said Beauclerc, ' if any of them equalled the expectations you had formed of them ? ' ' Some far exceeded them,' said Lady Davenant. 'You were fortunate. Everybody cannot expect to be so happy,' said Beauclerc. ' I believe, in general it is found that few great men of any times stand the test of near acquaintance. No man ' 'Spare me!' cried Lady Davenant, interrupting him, for she imagined she knew what he was going to say ; ' oh ! spare me that old sentence, " No man is a hero to his valet de chambre." I cannot endure to hear that for the thousandth time ; I heartily wish it had never been said at all.' ' So do I,' replied Beauclerc ; but Lady Davenant had turned away, and he now spoke in so low a voice that only Helen heard him. 'So do I detest that quotation, not only 128 HELEN for being hackneyed, but for having been these hundred years the comfort both of lean-jawed envy and fat mediocrity.' He took up one of Helen's pencils and began to cut it — he looked vexed, and low to her observed, ' Lady Davenant did not do me the honour to let me finish my sentence.' ' Then,' said Helen, ' if Lady Davenant misunderstood you, why do not you explain ? ' ' No, no, it is not worth while, if she could so mistake me.' ' But anybody may be mistaken ; do explain.' ' No, no,' said he, very diligently cutting the pencil to pieces ; ' she is engaged, you see, with somebody — something else.' ' But now she has done listening.' ' No, no, not now ; there are too many people, and it's of no consequence.' By this time the company were all eagerly talking of every remarkable person they had seen, or that they regretted not having seen. Lady Cecilia now called upon each to name the man among the celebrated of modern days whom they should most like to have seen. By acclamation they all named Sir Walter Scott, " The Ariosto of the North ! " ' All but Beauclerc ; he did not join the general voice ; he said low to Helen with an air of disgust — ' How tired I am of hearing him called " The Ariosto of the North ! " ' ' But by whatever name,' said Helen, ' surely you join in that general wish to have seen him ? ' ' Yes, yes, I am sure of your vote,' cried Lady Cecilia, coming up to them. ' You, Granville, would rather have seen Sir Walter Scott than any author since Shakespeare — would not you ? ' ' Pardon me, on the contrary, I am glad that I have never seen him.' ' Glad not to have seen him ! — not ? ' The word noi was repeated with astonished incredulous emphasis by all voices. ' Glad not to have seen Sir Walter Scott ! How extraordinary ! What can Mr. Beauclerc mean ? ' ' To make us all stare,' said Lady Davenant, ' so do not gratify him. Do not wonder at him ; we cannot believe what is impossible, you know, only because it is impossible. But,' continued she, laughing, ' I know how it is. The spirit of K 129 HELEN contradiction — the spirit of singularity — two of your familiars, Granville, have got possession of you again, and we must have patience while the fit is on.' ' But I have not, and will not have, patience,' said Lord Davenant, whose good-nature seldom failed, but who was now quite indignant. ' I wonder you are surprised, my dear lord,' said Lady Davenant, ' for Mr. Beauclerc likes so much better to go wrong by himself than to go right with all the world, that you could not expect that he would join the loud voice of universal praise.' ' I hear the loud voice of universal execration,' said Beau- clerc ; ' you have all abused me, but whom have I abused ? What have I said ? ' ' Nothing,' replied Lady Cecilia ; ' that is what we complain of. I could have better borne any abuse than indifference to Sir Walter Scott.' ' Indifference ! ' exclaimed Beauclerc — ' what did I say. Lady Cecilia, from which you could infer that I felt indiffer- ence ? Indifferent to him whose name I cannot pronounce without emotion ! 1 alone, of all the world, indifferent to that genius, pre-eminent and unrivalled, who has so long com- manded the attention of the whole reading public, arrested at will the instant order of the day by tales of other times, and in this commonplace, this everyday existence of ours, created a holiday world, where, undisturbed by vulgar cares, we may revel in a fancy region of felicity, peopled with men of other times — shades of the historic dead, more illustrious and brighter than in life ! ' 'Yes, the great Enchanter,' cried Ceciha. ' Great and good Enchanter,' continued Beauclerc, ' for in his magic there is no dealing with unlawful means. To work his ends, there is never aid from any one of the bad passions of our nature. In his writings there is no private scandal — no personal satire — no bribe to human frailty — no libel upon human nature. And among the lonely, the sad, and the suf- fering, how has he medicined to repose the disturbed mind, or elevated the dejected spirit ! — perhaps fanned to a flame the unquenched spark, in souls not wholly lost to virtue. His morahty is not in purple patches, ostentatiously obtrusive, but woven in through the very texture of the stuff. He paints 130 HELEN man as he is, with all his faults, but with his redeeming virtues — the world as it goes, with all its compensating good and evil, yet making each man better contented with his lot. Without our well knowing how, the whole tone of our minds is raised — for, thinking nobly of our kind, he makes us think more nobly of ourselves ! ' Helen, who had sympathised with Beauclerc in every word he had said, felt how true it is that Next to genius, is the power Of feeling where true genius lies. 'Yet after all this, Granville,' said Lady Cecilia, 'you would make us believe you never wished to have seen this great man ? ' Beauclerc made no answer. ' Oh, how I wish I had seen him ! ' said Helen to Lady Davenant, the only person present who had had that happiness. ' If you have seen Raeburn's admirable pictures, or Chan- trey's speaking bust,' replied Lady Davenant, 'you have as complete an idea of Sir Walter Scott as painting or sculpture can give. The first impression of his appearance and manner was surprising to me, I recollect, from its quiet, unpretending good nature ; but scarcely had that impression been made before I was struck with something of the chivalrous courtesy of other times. In his conversation you would have found all that is most delightful in all his works — the combined talent and knowledge of the historian, novelist, antiquary, and poet. He recited poetry admirably, his whole face and figure kindling as he spoke : but whether talking, reading, or reciting, he never tired me, even with admiring ; and it is curious that, in con- versing with him, I frequently found myself forgetting that I was speaking to Sir Walter Scott; and what is even more extraordinary, forgetting that Sir Walter Scott was speaking to me, till I was awakened to the conviction by his saying some- thing which no one else could have said. Altogether he was certainly the most perfectly agreeable and perfectly amiable great man I ever knew.' 'And now, mamma,' said Lady Cecilia, 'do make Gran- ville confess honestly he would give the world to have seen him.' 'Do, Lady Davenant,' said Helen, who saw, or thought 131 HELEN she saw, a singular emotion in Beauclerc's countenance, and fancied he was upon the point of yielding ; but Lady Dave- nant, without looking at him, replied, — ' No, my dear, I will not ask him — I will not encourage him in affectation.' At that word dark grew the brow of Beauclerc, and he drew back, as it were, into his shell, and out of it came no more that night, nor the next morning at breakfast. But, as far as could be guessed, he suffered internally, and no effort made to relieve did him any good, so every one seemed to agree that it was much better to let him alone, or let him be moody in peace, hoping that in time the mood would change ; but it changed not till the middle of that day, when, as Helen was sitting working in Lady Davenant's room, while she was writing, two quick knocks were heard at the door. ' Come in ! ' said Lady Davenant. Mr. Beauclerc stood pausing on the threshold. ' Do not go. Miss Stanley,' said he, looking very miserable and ashamed, and proud, and then ashamed again. ' What is the matter, Granville ? ' said Lady Davenant. ' I am come to have a thorn taken out of my mind,' said he — ' two thorns which have sunk deep, kept me awake half the night. Perhaps, I ought to be ashamed to own I have felt pain from such little things. But so it is ; though, after all, I am afraid they will be invisible to you, Lady Davenant.' ' I will try with a magnifying-glass,' said she ; ' lend me that of your imagination, Granville — a high power, and do not look so very miserable, or Miss Stanley will laugh at you.' ' Miss Stanley is too good to laugh.' ' That is being too good indeed,' said Lady Davenant. 'Well, now to the point' ' You were very unjust to me. Lady Davenant, yesterday, and unkind.' ' Unkind is a woman's word ; but go on.' ' Surely man may mark " unkindness' altered eye" as well as woman,' said Beauclerc ; ' and from a woman and a friend he may and must feel it, or he is more or less than man.' ' Now what can you have to say, Granville, that will not be anticlimax to this exordium ? ' ' I will say no more if you talk of exordiums and anti- climaxes,' cried he. ' You accused me yesterday of affecta- tion — twice, when I was no more affected than you are.' 132 Mr. Beauclen stood pausing oti the threshold. HELEN ' Oh ! is that my crime ? Is that what has hurt you so dreadfully ? Here is the thorn that has gone in so deep ! I am afraid that, as is usual, the accusation hurt the more because it was ' ' Do not say " true," interrupted Beauclerc, ' for you really cannot believe it. Lady Davenant. You know me, and all my faults, and I have plenty ; but you need not accuse me of one that I have not, and which from the bottom of my soul I despise. Whatever are my faults, they are at least real, and my own.' ' You may allow him that,' said Helen. 'Well, I will — I do,' said Lady Davenant; 'to appease you, poor injured innocence ; though any one in the world might think you affected at this moment. Yet 1, who know you, know that it is pure real folly. Yes, yes, I acquit you of affectation.' Beauclerc's face instantly cleared up. ' But you said two thorns had gone into your mind — one is out, now for the other.' ' I do not feel that other now,' said Beauclerc, ' it was only a mistake. When I began with " No man," I was not going to say, " No man is a hero to his valet de chambre." If I had been allowed to finish my sentence, it would have saved a great deal of trouble. 1 was going to say that no man admires excellence more fervently than I do, and that my very reason for wishing not to see celebrated people is, lest the illusion should be dispelled. ' No description ever gives us an exact idea of any person, so that when any one has been much described and talked of, before we see them we form in our mind's eye some image, some notion of our own, which always proves to be unlike the reality ; and when we do afterwards see it, even if it be fairer or better than our imagination, still at first there is a sort of disappointment, from the non-agreement with our previously formed conception. Everybody is disappointed the first time they see Hamlet, or FalstafT, as I think Dugald Stewart observes.' ' True ; and I remember,' said Lady Davenant, ' Madame de la Rochejaquelin once said to me, ' I hate that people should come to see me. I know it destroys the illusion.' ' Yes,' cried Beauclerc ; ' how much I dread to destroy any 134 HELEN of those blessed illusions, which make the real happiness of life. Let me preserve the objects of my idolatry ; I would not approach too near the shrine ; I fear too much light. I would not know that they were false ! ' ' Would you then be deceived ? ' said Lady Davenant. ' Yes,' cried he ; ' sooner would I believe in all the fables of the Talmud than be without the ecstasy of veneration. It is the curse of age to be thus miserably disenchanted ; to outlive all our illusions, all our hopes. That may be my doom in age, but, in youth, the high spring-time of existence, I will not be cursed with such a premature ossification of the heart. Oh ! rather, ten thousand times rather, would I die this instant ! ' ' Well ! but there is not the least occasion for your dying,' said Lady Davenant, ' and I am seriously surprised that you should suffer so much from such slight causes ; how will you ever get through the world if you stop thus to weigh every light word .'' ' ' The words of most people,' replied he, ' pass by me like the idle wind ; but I do weigh every word from the very few whom I esteem, admire, and love ; with my friends, perhaps, 1 am too susceptible, I love them so deeply.' This is an excuse for susceptibility of temper which flatters friends too much to be easily rejected. Even Lady Davenant admitted it, and Helen thought it was all natural. CHAPTER XIII Lady Cecilia was now impatient to have the house filled with company. She gave Helen a catalogue raisonrU of all who were expected at Clarendon Park, some for a fashionable three days' visit ; some for a week ; some for a fortnight or three weeks, be the same more or less. ' I have but one fixed principle,' said she, ' but I have one, — never to have tiresome people when it can possibly be avoided. Impossible, you know, it is sometimes. One's own and one's husband's relations one must have ; but, as for the rest, it's one's own fault if one fails in the first and last maxim of hospitaUty — to welcome the coming and speed the parting guest.' 135 HELEN The first party who arrived were of Lady Davenant's par- ticular friends, to whom Cecilia had kindly given the precedence, if not the preference, that her mother might have the pleasure of seeing them, and that they might have the honour of taking leave of her, before her departure from England. They were political, fashionable, and literary ; some of ascendency in society, some of parliamentary promise, and some of ministerial eminence — the aristocracy of birth and talents well mixed. The aristocracy of birth and the aristocracy of talents are words now used more as a commonplace antithesis, than as denoting a real difference or contrast. In many instances, among those now living, both are united in a manner happy for themselves and glorious for their country. England may boast of having among her young nobility The first in birth, the first in fame, men distinguished in literature and science, in senatorial eloquence and statesmanlike abilities. But in this party at Clarendon Park there were more of the literary and celebrated than without the presence of Lady Davenant could perhaps have been assembled, or perhaps would have been desired by the General and Lady Cecilia. Ceciha's beauty and grace were of all societies, and the General was glad for Lady Davenant's sake and proud for his own part to receive these distinguished persons at his house. Helen had seen some of them before at Cecilhurst and at the Deanery. By her uncle's friends she was kindly re- cognised, by others of course politely noticed ; but miserably would she have been disappointed and mortified, if she had expected to fix general attention, or excite general admiration. Past and gone for ever are the days, if ever they were, when a young lady, on her entrance into life, captivated by a glance, overthrew by the first word, and led in triumph her train of admirers. These things are not to be done nowadays. Yet even when unnoticed Helen was perfectly happy. Her expectations were more than gratified in seeing and in hearing these distinguished people, and she sat listening to their conversation in delightful enjoyment, without even wanting to have it seen how well she understood. There is a precious moment for young people, if taken at 136 HELEN the prime, when first introduced into society, yet not expected, not called upon to take a part in it, they, as standers-by, may see not only all the play, but the characters of the players, and may learn more of life and of human nature in a few months than afterwards in years, when they are themselves actors upon the stage of life, and become engrossed by their own parts. There is a time, before the passions are awakened, when the understanding, with all the life of nature, fresh from all that education can do to develop and cultivate, is at once eager to observe and able to judge, for a brief space blessed with the double advantages of youth and age. This time once gone is lost irreparably ; and how often it is lost — in premature vanity, or premature dissipation ! Helen had been chiefly educated by a man, and a very sensible man, as Dean Stanley certainly was in all but money matters. Under his masculine care, while her mind had been brought forward on some points, it had been kept back on others, and while her understanding had been cultivated, it had been done without the aid of emulation or competition ; not by touching the springs of pride, but by opening sources of pure pleasure ; and this pure pleasure she now enjoyed, grateful to that dear uncle. For the single inimitable grace of simplicity which she possessed, how many mothers, governesses, and young ladies themselves, willingly, when they see how much it charms, would too late exchange half the accomplishments, all the acquirements, so laboriously achieved ! Beauclerc, who had seen something of the London female world, was, both from his natural taste and from contrast, pleased with Helen's fresh and genuine character, and he sympathised with all her silent delight. He never interrupted her in her enthusiastic contemplation of the great stars, but he would now and then seize an interval of rest to compare her observations with his own ; anxious to know whether she estimated their relative magnitude and distances as he did. These snatched moments of comparison and proof of agree- ment in their observations, or the pleasure of examining the causes of their difference of opinion, enhanced the enjoyment of this brilliant fortnight ; and not a cloud obscured the deep serene. Notwithstanding all the ultra-refined nonsense Beauclerc 137 HELEN had talked about his wish not to see remarkable persons, no one could enjoy it more, as Helen now perceived ; and she saw also that he was considered as a man of promise among all these men of performance. But there were some, perhaps very slight things, which raised him still more in her mind, because they showed superiority of character. She observed his manner towards the General in this company, where he had himself the 'vantage ground — so different now from what it had been in the Old Forest battle, when only man to man, ward to guardian. Before these distinguished persons there was a look — a tone of deference at once most affectionate and polite. ' It is so generous,' said Lady Cecilia to Helen ; ' is not it ? ' and Helen agreed. This brilliant fortnight ended too soon, as Helen thought, but Lady Cecilia had had quite enough of it. ' They are all to go to-morrow morning, and I am not sorry for it,' said she at night, as she threw herself into an arm-chair in Helen's room ; and, after having indulged in a refreshing yawn, she exclaimed, ' Very delightful, very delightful ! as you say, Helen, it has all been ; but I am not sure that I should not be very much tired if I had much more of it. Oh yes, I admired them all amazingly, but then admiring all day long is excessively wearisome. The very attitude of looking up fatigues both body and mind. Mamma is never tired, because she never has to look up ; she can always look down, and that's so grand and so easy. She has no idea how the neck of my poor mind aches this minute ; and my poor eyes ! blasted with excess of light. How yours have stood it so well, Helen, I cannot imagine ! how much stronger they must be than mine. I must confess, that, without the relief of music now and then, and ecartd, and that quadrille, bad as it was, I should never have got through it to-night alive or awake. But,' cried she, starting up in her chair, ' do you know Horace Churchill stays to-morrow ? Such a compliment from him to stay a day longer than he intended ! And do you know what he says of your eyes, Helen ? — that they are the best listeners he ever spoke to. I should warn you though, my dear, that he is something, and not a little, I believe, of a male coquette. Though he is not very young, but he well understands all the advantages of a careful toilette. He has, like that 138 She threw herself into an ar»i-ehmr in Helen's room, HELEN George Herbert in Queen Elizabeth's time, 'a genteel humour for dress.' He is handsome still, and his fine figure, and his fine feelings, and his fine fortune, have broken two or three hearts ; nevertheless I am delighted that he stays, especially that he stays on your account.' ' Upon my account ! ' exclaimed Helen. ' Did not you see that, from the first day when Mr. Churchill had the misfortune to be placed beside me at dinner, he utterly despised me ? he began to talk to me, indeed, but left his sentence unfinished, his good story untold, the instant he caught the eye of a grander auditor.' Lady Cecilia had seen this, and marvelled at a well-bred man so far forgetting himself in vanity ; but this, she observed, was only the first day ; he had afterwards changed his manner towards Helen completely. ' Yes, when he saw Lady Davenant thought me worth speaking to. But, after all, it was quite natural that he should not know well what to say to me. I am only n young lady. I acquit him of all peculiar rudeness to me, for I am sure Mr. Churchill really could not talk for only one in- significant hearer, could not bring out his good things, unless he felt secure of possessing the attention of the whole dinner- table, so I quite forgive him.' ' After this curse of forgiveness, my dear Helen, I will wish you a good -night,' said Lady Cecilia, laughing ; and she retired with a fear that there would not be jealousy enough between the gentlemen, or that Helen would not know how to play them one against another. There is a pleasure in seeing a large party disperse ; in staying behind when others go : — there is advantage as well as pleasure, which is felt by the timid, because they do not leave their characters behind them ; and rejoiced in by the satirical, because the characters of the departed and departing are left behind, fair game for them. Of this advantage no one could be more sensible, no one availed himself of it with more promptitude and skill, than Mr. Churchill ; for well he knew that though wit may fail, humour may not take — though even flattery may pall upon the sense, scandal, satire, and sarcasm are resources never failing for the lowest capacities, and sometimes for the highest. This morning, in the library at Clarendon Park, he looked 140 HELEN out of the window at the departing guests, and, as each drove off, he gave to each his coup de patie. To Helen, to whom it was new, it was wonderful to see how each, even of those next in turn to go, enjoyed the demolition of those who were just gone ; how, bhnd to fate, they laughed, applauded, and hcked the hand just raised to strike themselves. Of the first who went — ' Most respectable people,' said Lady Cecilia ; ' a bonne mire de famille.' ' Most respectable people ! ' repeated Horace — ' most respectable people, old coach and all.' And then, as another party drove off — ' No fear of anything truly respectable here.' ' Now, Horace, how can you say so ? — she is so amiable and so clever.' ' So clever ? only, perhaps, a thought too fond of English liberty and French dress. Poissarde Men coiffee.' •■Poissarde! of one of the best-born, best-bred women in England ! ' cried Lady Cecilia ; ' bien coiffde I allow.' ' Lady Cecilia is si coiffde de sa belle amie that I see I must not say a word against her, till — the fashion changes. But, hark ! I hear a voice I never wish to hear.' ' Yet nobody is better worth hearing ' ' Oh yes, the queen of the Blues — the Blue Devils ! ' ' Hush ! ' cried the aide-de-camp, ' she is coming in to take leave.' Then, as the queen of the Blue Devils entered, Mr. Churchill, in the most humbly respectful manner, begged— ' My respects — I trust your Grace will do me the favour — the justice to remember me to all your party who — do me the honour to bear me in mind'— then, as she left the room, he turned about and laughed. ' Oh ! you sad, false man ! ' cried the lady next m turn to go. ' I declare, Mr. Churchill, though I laugh, I am quite afraid to go off before you.' ' Afraid ! what could malice or envy itself find to say of your ladyship, intacte as you are? IntacteP repeated he, as she drove off, 'intacte/— a. well-chosen epithet, I flatter myself!' 'Yes, z«/arf«— untouched— above the breath of slander,' cried Lady Cecilia. ' I know it : so I say,' replied Churchill : 'fidelity that has stood all temptations— to which it has ever been exposed ; and her husband is ' 141 HELEN ' A near relation of mine,' said Lady Cecilia. ' I am not prudish as to scandal in general,' continued she, laughing ; ' " a chicken, too, might do me good," but then the fox must not prey at home. No one ought to stand by and hear their own relations abused.' ' A thousand pardons ! I depended too much on the general maxim — that the nearer the bone the sweeter the slander.' ' Nonsense ! ' said Lady Cecilia. ' I meant to say, the nearer the heart the dearer the blame. A cut against a first cousin may go wrong — but a bosom friend — oh ! how I have succeeded against best friends ; scolded all the while, of course, and called a monster. But there is Sir Stephen bowing to you.' Then, as Lady Cecilia kissed her hand to him from the window, Churchill went on : ' By the bye, without any scandal, seriously I heard something — I was quite concerned — that he had been of late less in his study and more in the boudoir of . Surely it cannot be true ! ' ' Positively false,' said Lady Cecilia. ' At every breath a reputation dies,' said Beauclerc. ' 'Pon my soul, that's true ! ' said the aide -de - camp. ' Positively, hit or miss, Horace has been going on, firing away with his wit, pop, pop, pop ! till he has bagged — how many brace ? ' Horace turned away from him contemptuously, and looked to see whereabouts Lady Davenant might be all this time. CHAPTER XIV Lady Davenant was at the far end of the room engrossed, Churchill feared, by the newspaper ; as he approached she laid it down, and said, — ' How scandalous some of these papers have become, but it is the fault of the taste of the age. " Those who live to please, must please to live." ' Horace was not sure whether he was cut or not, but he had the presence of mind not to look hurt. He drew nearer to 142 HELEN Lady Davenant, seated himself, and taking up a book as if he was tired of folly, to which he had merely condescended, he sat and read, and then sat and thought, the book hanging from his hand. The result of these profound thoughts he gave to the public, not to the aide-de-camp ; no more of the httle popgun pellets of wits — but now were brought out reason and philosophy. In a higher tone he now reviewed the literary, philosophical, and political world, with touches of La Bruy^re and Rochefoucauld in the characters he drew and in the reflections he made ; with an air, too, of sentimental contrition for his own penetration and fine moral sense, which compelled him to see and to be annoyed by the faults of such superior men. The analysis he made of every mind was really perfect — in one respect, not a grain of bad but was separated from the good, and held up clean and clear to public view. And as an anatomist he showed such knowledge both of the brain and of the heart, such an admirable acquaintance with all their diseases, and handled the probe and the scalpel so well, with such a practised hand ! ' Well, really this is comfortable,' said Lord Davenant, throwing himself back in his arm-chair — 'true English comfort, to sit at ease and see all one's friends so well dissected ! Happy to feel that it is our duty to our neighbour to see him well cut up — ably anatomised for the good of society ; and when I depart — when my time comes — as come it must, nobody is to touch me but Professor Churchill. It will be a satisfaction to know that I shall be carved as a dish fit for gods, not hewed as a carcase for hounds. So now remember, Cecilia, I call on you to witness — I hereby, being of sound mind and body, leave and bequeath my character, with all my defects and deficiencies whatever, and all and any singular curious diseases of the mind, of which I may die possessed, wishing the same many for his sake, — to my good friend Doctor Horace Churchill, professor of moral, philosophic, and scandalous anatomy, to be by him dissected at his good pleasure for the benefit of society.' ' Many thanks, my good lord ; and I accept your legacy for the honour — not the value of the gift, which everybody must be sensible is nothing,' said Churchill, with a polite bow — ' ab- solutely nothing. I shall never be able to make anything of it.' 143 HELEN ' Try — try, my dear friend,' answered Lord Davenant. ' Try, don't be modest.' ' That would be difficult when so distinguished,' said Beau- clerc, with an admirable look of proud humility. ' Distinguished Mr. Horace Churchill assuredly is,' said Lady Davenant, looking at him from behind her newspaper. ' Distinguished above all his many competitors in this age of scandal ; he has really raised the art to the dignity of a science. Satire, scandal, and gossip, now hand-in-hand — the three new graces : all on the same elevated rank — three, formerly considered as so different, and the last left to our inferior sex, but now, surely, to be a male gossip is no reproach.' ' Oh, Lady Davenant ! — male gossip — what an expression ! ' ' What a reality ! ' 'Male gossip! — ^^ Toinbe sur moi le del/"' cried Churchill. ' " Pourvu que je me venge " always understood,' pursued Lady Davenant ; ' but why be so afraid of the imputation of gossiping, Mr. Churchill ? It is quite fashionable, and if so, quite respectable, you know, and in your style quite grand. • And gossiping wonders at being so fine ! Malice, to be hated, needs but to be seen, but now when it is elegantly dressed we look upon it without shame or conscious- ness of evil ; we grow to doat upon it — so entertaining, so graceful, so refined. When vice loses half its grossness, it loses all its deformity. Humanity used to be talked of when our friends were torn to pieces, but now there is such a philo- , sophical perfume thrown over the whole operation, that we are irresistibly attracted. How much we owe to such men as Mr. Churchill, who make us feel detraction virtue ! ' He bowed low as Lady Davenant, summoned by her lord, left the room, and there he stood as one condemned but not penitent. ' If I have not been well sentenced,' said he, as the door closed, ' and made " to feel detraction virtue ! " But since Lady Cecilia cannot help smiling at that, I am acquitted, and encouraged to sin again the first opportunity. But Lady Dave- nant shall not be by, nor Lord Davenant either.' Lady Cecilia sat down to write a note, and Mr. Churchill 144 HELEN walked round the room in a course of critical observation on the pictures, of which, as of everything else, he was a supreme judge. At last he put his eye and his glass down to something which singularly attracted his attention on one of the marble tables. ' Pretty ! ' said Lady Cecilia, ' pretty are not they ? — though one's so tired of them everywhere now — those doves 1 ' ' Doves ! ' said Churchill, ' what I am admiring are gloves, are not they. Miss Stanley ? ' said he, pointing to an old pair of gloves, which, much wrinkled and squeezed together, lay on the beautiful marble in rather an unsightly lump. ' Poor Doctor V ,' cried Helen to Cecilia ; ' that poor Doctor V is as absent as ever ! he is gone, and has for- gotten his gloves ! ' ' Absent ! oh, as ever ! ' said Lady Cecilia, going on with her note, ' the most absent man alive.' ' Too much of that sort of thing 1 think there is in Doctor V ,' pursued Churchill : ' a touch of absence of mind, giving the idea of high abstraction, becomes a learned man well enough ; but then it should only be slight, as a soupqon of rouge, which may become a pretty woman : all depends on the measure, the taste, with which these things are managed — put on.' 'There is nothing managed, nothing put on, in Doctor V ,' cried Helen eagerly, her colour rising ; ' it is all per- fectly sincere, true in him, whatever it be.' Beauderc put down his book. ' All perfectly true ! You really think so, Miss Stanley ? ' said Churchill smiling, and looking superior down. ' I do, indeed,' cried Helen. ' Charming — so young I How 1 do love that freshness of mind ! ' ' Impertinent fellow ! I could knock him down,' felt Beau- derc. ' And you think all Doctor V 's humility true ? ' said Churchill. ' Yes, perfectly ! ' said Helen ; ' but 1 do not wonder you are surprised at it, Mr. Churchill.' She meant no malice, though for a moment he thought she did ; and he winced under Beauclerc's smile. ' I do not wonder that any one who does not know Doctor L 145 HELEN V . should be surprised by his great humihty,' added Helen. ' You are sure that it is not pride that apes humility ? ' asked Churchill. ' Yes, quite sure ! ' ' Yet — ' said Churchill (putting his malicious finger through a great hole in the thumb of the Doctor's glove), ' I should have fancied that I saw vanity through the holes in these gloves, as through the philosopher's cloak of old.' ' Horace is a famous fellow for picking holes and making much of them, Miss Stanley, you see,' said the aide-de-camp. ' Vanity ! Doctor V has no vanity ! ' said Helen, ' if you knew him.' ' No vanity ! Whom does Miss Stanley mean ? ' cried the aide-de-camp. ' No vanity ? that's good. Who? Horace?' ' Maiivais plaisant !' Horace put him by, and, happily not easily put out of countenance, he continued to Helen, — 'You give the good doctor credit, too, for all his naivete?' said Churchill. 'He does not want credit for it,' said Helen, 'he really has it.' ' I wish 1 could see things as you do. Miss Stanley.' ' Show him that, Helen,' cried Lady Cecilia, looking at a table beside them, on which lay one of those dioramic prints which appear all a confusion of lines till you look at them in their right point of view. ' Show him that — it all depends, and so does seeing characters, on getting the right point of view.' ' Ingenious ! ' said Churchill, trying to catch the right position ; ' but 1 can't, I own — ' then abruptly resuming, '■ Naiiicte charms me at fifteen,' and his eye glanced at Helen, then was retracted, then returning to his point of view, ' at eighteen perhaps may do,' and his eyes again turned to Helen, 'at eighteen — it captivates me quite,' and his eye dwelt. ' But naivete at past fifty, verging to sixty, is quite another thing, really rather too much for me. 1 like all things in season, and above all, simplicity will not bear long keeping. I have the greatest respect possible for our learned and excellent friend, but I wish this could be any way suggested to him, and that he would lay aside this out-of-season simplicity.' ' He cannot lay aside his nature,' said Helen, ' and I am glad of it, it is such a good nature.' 146 HELEN ' Kind-hearted creature he is, I never heard him say a severe word of any one,' said Lady Cecilia. 'What a sweet man he must be!' said Horace, making a face at which none present, not even Helen, could forbear to smile. ' His heart, I am sure, is in the right place always. I only wish one could say the same of his wig. And would it be amiss if he sometimes (I would not be too hard upon him, Miss Stanley), once a fortnight, suppose — brushed, or caused to be brushed, that coat of his .' ' ' You have dusted his jacket for him famously, Horace, I think,' said the aide-de-camp. At this instant the door opened, and in came the doctor himself. Lady Cecilia's hand was outstretched with her note, think- ing, as the door opened, that she should see the servant come in, for whom she had rung. ' What surprises you all so, my good friends ? ' said the doctor, stopping and looking round in all his native simplicity. ' My dear doctor,' said Lady Cecilia, ' only we all thought you were gone — that's all.' ' And I am not gone, that's all. I stayed to write a letter, and am come here to look for — but I cannot find — my ' ' Your gloves, perhaps, doctor, you are looking for,' said Churchill, going forward, and with an air of the greatest respect and consideration, both for the gloves and for their owner, he presented them ; then shook the doctor by the hand, with a cordiality which the good soul thought truly Enghsh, and, bowing him out, added, ' How proud he had been to make his acquaintance, — au revoir, he hoped, in Park Lane.' ' Oh you treacherous ! ' cried Lady Cecilia, turning to Horace, as soon as the unsuspecting philosopher was fairly gone. ' Too bad really ! If he were not the most simple- minded creature extant, he must have seen, suspected, some- thing from your look ; and what would have become of you if the doctor had come in one moment sooner, and had heard you ? I was really frightened.' ' Frightened ! so was I, almost out of my wits,' said Churchill. 'Lesrevenansa.l-wa.ys frighten one; and they never hear any good of themselves, for which reason I make it a principle, when once I have left a room, full of friends especially, never never to go back. My gloves, my hat, my coat, I'd leave, 147 ■O ' PFkai surprises you all so, my good friends f ' HELEN sooner than lose my friends. Once I heard it said, by one who knew the world and human nature better than any of us — once I heard it said in jest, but in sober earnest I say, that I would not for more than I am worth be placed, without his knowing it, within earshot of my best friend.' ' What sort of a best friend can yours be ? ' cried Beauclerc. ' Much like other people's, I suppose,' replied Horace, speaking with perfect nonchalance — ' much like other people's best friends. Whosoever expects to find better, I guess, will find worse, if he live in the world we live in.' ' May I go out of the world before I believe or suspect any such thing ! ' cried Beauclerc. ' Rather than have the Roman curse light upon me, " May you survive all your friends and relations ! " may I die a thousand times ! ' ' Who talks of dying, in a voice so sweet — a voice so loud ? ' said provoking Horace, in his calm, well-bred tone ; ' for my part, I who have the honour of speaking to you, can boast, that never since I was of years of discretion (counting new style, beginning at thirteen, of course)' — never have I lost a friend, a sincere friend — never, for this irrefragable reason — since that nonage, never was I such a neophyte as to fancy I had found that lusus naturae, a friend perfectly sincere.' ' How 1 pity you ! ' cried Beauclerc, ' if you are in earnest ; but in earnest you can't be.' ' Pardon me, I can, and I am. And in earnest you will oblige me, Mr. Beauclerc, if you will spare me your pity : for, all things in this world considered,' said Horace Churchill, drawing himself up, ' I do not conceive that I am much an object of pity.' Then, turning upon his heel, he walked away, conscious, however, half an instant afterwards, that he had drawn himself up too high, and that for a moment his temper had spoiled his tone, and betrayed him into a look and manner too boastful, bordering on the ridiculous. He was in haste to repair the error. Not Garrick, in the height of his celebrity and of his sus- ceptibility, was ever more anxious than Horace Churchill to avert the stroke of ridicule — to guard against the dreaded smile. As he walked away, he felt behind his back that those he left were smiling in silence. Lady Cecilia had thrown herself on a sofa, resting, after the labour of tHoquence de billet. He stopped, and, leaning over 149 HELEN the back of the sofa on which she rechned, repeated an Italian line in which was the word ' pavoneggiarsi.' ' My dear Lady Cecilia, you, who understand and feel Ita- lian so well, how expressive are some of their words ! Pavoneg- giarsi ! — untranslatable. One cannot say well in English to peacock oneself. To make oneself like unto a peacock is flat ; but pavoneggiarsi — action, passion, picture, all in one ! To plume oneself comes nearest to it ; but the word cannot be given, even by equivalents, in English ; nor can it be natu- ralised, because, in fact, we have not the feeling. An English- man is too proud to boast — too bashfal to strut ; if ever he peacocks himself, it is in a moment of anger, not in display. The language of every country,' continued he, raising his voice, in order to reach Lady Davenant, who just then returned to the room, as he did not wish to waste a philosophical observa- tion on Lady Cecilia, — ' the language of every country is, to a certain degree, evidence, record, history of its character and manners.' Then, lowering his voice almost to a whisper, but very distinct, turning while he spoke so as to make sure that Miss Stanley heard — ' Your young friend this morning quite captivated me by her nature — nature, the thing that now is most uncommon, a real natural woman ; and when in a beauty, how charming ! How delicious when one meets with effusion de cceur : a young lady, too, who speaks pure English, not a leash of languages at once ; and cultivated, too, your friend is, for one does not like ignorance, if one could have knowledge without pretension — so hard to find the golden mean ! — and if one could find it, one might not be nearer to ' Lady Cecilia listened for the finishing word, but none came. It all ended in a sigh, to be interpreted as she pleased. A look towards the ottoman, where Beauclerc had now taken his seat beside Miss Stanley, seemed to point the meaning out : but Lady Cecilia knew her man too well to understand him. Beauclerc, seated on the ottoman, was showing to Helen some passages in the book he was reading ; she read with attention, and from time to time looked up with a smile of intelligence and approbation. What either said Horace could not hear, and he was the more curious, and when the book was put down, after carelessly opening others he took it up. Very much surprised was he to find it neither novel nor poem : many passages were marked with pencil notes of approbation, 15° HELEN he took it for granted these were Beauclerc's ; there he was mistaken, they were Lady Davenant's. She was at her work- table. Horace, book in hand, approached ; the book was not in his line, it was more scientific than literary — it was for posterity more than for the day ; he had only turned it over as literary men turn over scientific books, to seize what may serve for a new simile or a good allusion ; besides, among his philo- sophical friends, the book being talked of, it was well to know enough of it to have something to say, and he had said well, very judiciously he had praised it among the elect ; but now it was his fancy to depreciate it with all his might ; not that he disliked the author or the work now more than he had done before, but he was in the humour to take the opposite side from Beauclerc, so he threw the book from him contemptuously. ' Rather a slight hasty thing, in my opinion,' said he. Beauclerc's eyes took fire as he exclaimed, ' Slight ! hasty ! this most noble, most sohd work ! ' 'Sohd in your opinion,' said Churchill, with a smile defe- rential, slightly sneering. ' Our own opinion is all that either of us can give,' said Beauclerc ; < in my opinion it is the finest view of the progress of natural philosophy, the most enlarged, the most just in its judgments of the past, and in its prescience of the future ; in the richness of experimental knowledge, in its theoretic inven- tion, the greatest work by any one individual since the time of Bacon.' ' And Bacon is under your protection, too ? ' ' Protection ! my protection ? ' said Beauclerc. ' Pardon me, I simply meant to ask if you are one of those who swear by Lord Verulam.' ' I swear by no man, I do not swear at all, not on philo- sophical subjects especially ; swearing adds nothing to faith,' said Beauclerc. ' I stand corrected,' said Churchill, ' and I would go further, and add that in argument enthusiasm adds nothing to reason much as I admire, as we all admire,' glancing at Miss Stanley, ' that enthusiasm with which this favoured work has been advocated ! ' ' I could not help speaking warmly,' cried Beauclerc ; 'it is a book to inspire enthusiasm ; there is such a noble spirit all through it, so pure from petty passions, from all vulgar 151 HELEN jealousies, all low concerns ! Judge of a book, somebody says, by the impression it leaves on your mind when you lay it down ; this book stands that test, at least with me ; I lay it down with such a wish to follow — with steps ever so unequal still to follow — where it points the way.' ' Bravo ! bravissimo ! hear him, hear him ! print him, print him ! hot-press from the author to the author, hot-press ! ' cried Churchill, and he laughed. Like one suddenly awakened from the trance of enthusiasm by the cold touch of ridicule, stood Beauclerc, brought down from heaven to earth, and by that horrid little laugh, not the heart's laugh. ' But my being ridiculous does not make my cause so, and that is a comfort.' 'And another comfort you may have, my dear Granville,' said Lady Davenant, ' that ridicule is not the test of truth ; truth should be the test of ridicule.' ' But where is the book ? ' continued Beauclerc. Helen gave it to him. ' Now, Mr. Churchill,' said Beauclerc ; ' 1 am really anxious, I know you are such a good critic, will you show me these faults ? blame as well as praise must always be valuable from those who themselves excel.' ' You are too good,' said Churchill. ' Will you then be good enough to point out the errors for me ? ' ' Oh, by no means,' cried Churchill, ' don't note me, do not quote me, I am nobody, and I cannot give up my authorities.' ' But the truth is all I want to get at,' said Beauclerc. ' Let her rest, my dear sir, at the bottom of her well ; there she is, and there she will be for ever and ever, and depend upon it none of our windlassing will ever bring her up.' ' Such an author as this,' continued Beauclerc, ' would have been so glad to h,i\e corrected any error.' ' So every author tells you, but I never saw one of them who did not look blank at a list of errata — if you knew how little one is thanked for them ! ' ' But you would be thanked now,' said Beauclerc : - ' the faults in style, at least.' ' Nay, I am no critic,' said Churchill, confident in his habits of literary detection ; 'but if you ask me,' said he, as he dis- 152 HELEN dainfully flirted the leaves back and forward with a ' There now!' and a ' Here now!' 'We should not call that good writing — you could not think this correct ? I may be wrong, but I should not use this phrase. Hardly English that — colloquial, I think ; and this awkward ablative absolute — never admitted now.' ' Thank you,' said Beauclerc, ' these faults are easily mended.' ' Easily mended, say you ? I say, better make a new one.' ' Who could ? ' said Beauclerc. ' How many faults you see,' said Helen, ' which I should never have perceived unless you had pointed them out, and I am sorry to know them now.' Smiling at Helen's look of sincere mortification, in contrast at this moment with Mr. Churchill's air of satisfied critical pride, Lady Davenant said, — ' Why sorry, my dear Helen ? No human work can be perfect ; Mr. Churchill may be proud of that strength of eye which in such a powerful light can count the spots. But whether it be the best use to make of his eyes, or the best use that can be made of the light, remains to be considered.' CHAPTER XV Beyond measure was Churchill provoked to find Lady Davenant against him and on the same side as Granville Beauclerc — all unused to contradiction in his own society, where he had long been supreme, he felt a difference of opinion so sturdily maintained as a personal insult. For so young a man as Beauclerc, yet unknown to fame, not only to challenge the combat but to obtain the victory, was intolerable ; and the more so, because his young opponent appeared no ways elated or surprised, but seemed satisfied to attribute his success to the goodness of his cause. Churchill had hitherto always managed wisely his great stakes and pretensions in both the fashionable and literary world. He had never actually published anything except a clever article or two in a review, or an epigram, attributed to 153 HELEN him but not acknowledged. Having avoided giving his measure, it was believed he was above all who had been publicly tried — it was always said — 'If Horace Churchill would but publish, he would surpass every other author of our times.' Churchill accordingly dreaded and hated all who might by possibility approach the throne of fashion, or interfere with his dictatorship in a certain literary set in London, and from this moment he began cordially to detest Beauclerc — he viewed him with scornful, yet with jealous eyes ; but his was the jealousy of vanity, not of love ; it regarded Lady Davenant and his fashionable reputation in the first place — Helen only in the second. Lady Davenant observed all this, and was anxious to know how much or how little Helen had seen, and what degree of interest it excited in her mind. One morning, when they were alone together, looking over a cabinet of cameos. Lady Davenant pointed to one which she thought like Mr. Beauclerc. Helen did not see the likeness. ' People see likenesses very differently,' said Lady Davenant. ' But you and 1, Helen, usually see characters, if not faces, with the same eyes. I have been thinking of these two gentlemen, Mr. Churchill and Mr. Beauclerc — which do you think the most agreeable ? ' 'Mr. Churchill is amusing certainly,' said Helen, 'but I think Mr. Beauclerc's conversation much more interesting — though Mr. Churchill is agreeable, sometimes — when ' ' When he flatters you,' said Lady Davenant. 'When he is not satirical — 1 was going to say,' said Helen. * There is a continual petty brilliancy, a petty effort too,' continued Lady Davenant, ' in Mr. Churchill, that tires me — sparks struck perpetually, but then you hear the striking of the flints, the clink of the tinder-box.' Helen, though she admitted the tinder-box, thought it too low a comparison. She thought Churchill's were not mere sparks. ' Well, fireworks, if you will,' said Lady Davenant, ' that rise, blaze, burst, fall, and leave you in darkness, and with a disagreeable smell too ; and it's all feu cF artifice after all. Now in Beauclerc there is too little art and too ardent nature. Some French friends of mine, who knew both, said of Mr. '54 HELEN Churchill, " De t esprit on ne pent pas plus mime d. Paris" the highest compliment a Parisian can pay, but they allowed that Beauclerc had " beaucoup plus d'ame." ' ' Yes,' said Helen ; ' how far superior ! ' ' It has been said,' continued Lady Davenant, ' that it is safer to judge of men by their actions than by their words, but there are few actions and many words in life ; and if women would avail themselves of their daily, hourly, oppor- tunities of judging people by their words, they would get at the natural characters, or, what is of just as much consequence, they would penetrate through the acquired habits ; and here, Helen, you have two good studies before you.' Preoccupied as Helen was with the certainty of Beauclerc being an engaged, almost a married man, and looking, as she did, on Churchill as one who must consider her as utterly beneath his notice, she listened to Lady Davenant's remarks as she would have done to observations about two characters in a novel or on the stage. As Churchill could not immediately manifest his hatred of Beauclerc, it worked inwardly the more. He did not sleep well this night, and when he got up in the morning, there was something the matter with him. Nervous, bilious— cross it could not be ; — -joumalier (a French word settles everything) — journalier he allowed he was ; he rather gloried in it, because his being permitted to be so proved his power, — his prerogative of fortune and talent combined. In the vast competition of the London world, it is not permitted to every man to be in his humour or out of his humour at pleasure ; but, by an uncommon combination of circumstances, Churchill had established his privilege of caprice ; he was allowed to have his bad and his good days, and the highest people and the finest smiled, and submitted to his ' cachet de faveur et de disgrace ' ; and when he was sulky, rude, or snappish, called it only Horace Churchill's way. They even prided themselves on his preferences and his aversions. ' Horace is always charming when he is with us.' ' With me you have no idea how delightful he is.' ' Indeed I must do him the justice to say that I never found him otherwise. While the less favoured permitted him to be as rude as he pleased, and only petted him, and told of his odd ways to those who sighed in vain to have him at their parties. HELEN But Lady Davenant was not a person to pet or spoil a child of any age, and to the General Mr. Churchill was not particularly agreeable — not his sort; while to Lady Cecilia, secure in grace, beauty, and fashion, his humours were only matter of amusement, and she bore with him pleasantly and laughingly. ' Such weather ! ' cried he in a querulous tone ; ' how can a man have any sense in such weather ? Some foreigner says that the odious climate of England is an over-balance for her good constitution. The sun of the south is in truth well worth the liberty of the north. It is a sad thing,' said he, with a very sentimental air, ' that a free-born Briton should be servile to these skyey influences ' ; and, grumbling on, he looked out of the window as cross as he pleased, and nobody minded him. The aide-de-camp civilly agreed with him that it was horrid weather, and likely to rain, and it did rain ; and every one knows how men, like children, are in certain circumstances affected miserably by a rainy day. There was no going out ; horses at the door, and obliged to be dismissed. Well, since there could be no riding, the next best thing the aide-de-camp thought was to talk of horses, and the officers all grew eager, and Churchill had a mind to exert himself so far as to show them that he knew more of the matter than they did ; that he was no mere book -man; but on this unlucky day all went wrong. It happened that Horace fell into some grievous error concerning the genealogy of a famous racehorse, and, disconcerted more than he would have been at being convicted of any degree of moral turpitude, vexed and ashamed, he talked no more of Newmarket or of Doncaster, left the race- ground to those who prided themselves on the excellences of their four-footed betters, and lounged into the billiard-room. He found Lady Cecilia playing with Beauclerc ; Miss Stanley was looking on. Churchill was a famous billiard- player, and took his turn to show how much better than Beauclerc he performed, but this day his hand was out, his eye not good ; he committed blunders of which a novice might have been ashamed. And there was Miss Stanley and there was Beauclerc by to see ! and Beauclerc pitied him ! O line extreme of human misery ! He retreated to the book -room, but there the intellectual Horace, with all the sages, poets, and novelists of every age 156 HELEN within his reach, reached them not ; but, with his hands in his pockets, like any squire or schoolboy under the load of ignorance or penalties of idleness, stood before the chimney- piece, eyeing the pendule, and verily believing that this morn- ing the hands went backward. Dressing-time at last came, and dinner-time, bringing relief how often to man and child ill-tempered; but this day to Churchill dinner brought only discomfiture worse discomfited. Some of the neighbouring families were to dine at Clarendon Park. Mr. Churchill abhorred country neighbours and country gentlemen. Among these, however, were some not unworthy to be perceived by him ; and besides these, there were some foreign officers ; one in particular, from Spain, of high rank and birth, of the sangre azul, the blue blood, who have the privilege of the silken cord if they should come to be hanged. This Spaniard was a man of distinguished talent, and for him Horace might have been expected to shine out ; it was his pleasure, however, this day to disappoint expectations, and to do 'the dishonours of his country.' He would talk only of eating, of which he was privileged not only to speak but to judge, and pronounce upon en dernier ressort, though this was only an air, for he was not really a gourmand ; but after ogling through his glass the distant dishes, when they with a wish came nigh, he, after a cursory glance or a close inspection, made them with a nod retire. At last he thought an opportunity offered for bringing in a well-prepared anecdote which he had about Cambac^rfes, and a hot blackbird and white feet, but unluckily a country gentle- man would tell some history of a battle between poachers and gamekeepers, which fixed the attention of the company till the moment for the anecdote was past. Horace left his tale untold, and spoke word never more till a subject was started on which he thought he could come out unrivalled. General Clarendon had some remarkably good wines. Churchill was referred to as a judge, and he allowed them to be all good, but he prided himself on possessing a certain Spanish wine, esteemed above all price, because not to be had for money — amontillado is its name. Horace appealed to the Spanish officer, who confirmed all he said of this vinous phenomenon. ' No cultivator can be certain of producing it. It has puzzled, almost to death, all the growers of Xeres : — it 157 HELEN is a variety of sherry, almost as difficult to judge of as to procure.' But Mr. Churchill boasted he had some, undoubtedly genuine ; he added, ' that Spanish judges had assured him his taste was so accurate he might venture to pronounce upon the difficult question of amontillado or not ! ' While he yet spoke. General Clarendon, unawares, placed before him some of this very fine wine, which, as he finished speaking, Churchill swallowed without knowing it from some other sherry which he had been drinking. He would have questioned that it was genuine, but the Spaniard, as far as he could pretend to judge, thought it unquestionable. Churchill's countenance fell in a manner that quite surprised Helen, and exceedingly amused Lady Cecilia. He was more mortified and vexed by this failure than by all the rest, for the whole table smiled. The evening of this day of misfortune was not brighter than the morning, everything was wrong — even at night — at night when at last the dinner company, the country visitors, relieved him from their presence, and when some comfort might be had, he thought, stretched in a good easy-chair — Lord Davenant had set him the example. But something had happened to all the chairs, — there was a variety of fashionable kinds ; he tried them by turns, but none of them this night would suit him. Yet Lady Cecilia maintained (for the General had chosen them) that they were each and all of them in their way com- fortable, in the full English spirit of the word, and according to the French explanation of comfortable, given to us by the Duchess d'Abrantes, convcnablement bon j but in compassion to Mr. Churchill's fastidious restlessness, she would now show him a perfection of a chair which she had just had made for her own boudoir. She ordered that it should be brought, and in it rolled, and it was looked at in every direction and sat in, and no fault could be found with it, even by the great fault- finder ; but what was it called ? It was neither a lounger, nor a dormeuse, nor a Cooper, nor a Nelson, nor a kangaroo : a chair without a name would never do ; in all things fashion- able the name is more than half Such a happy name as kangaroo Lady Cecilia despaired of finding for her new favourite, but she begged some one would give it a good one ; whoever gave her the best name should be invited to iS8 '%•^^^ Sleeky-hollow ! HELEN the honours and pleasures of the sitting in this chair for the rest of the night. Her eyes, and all eyes, turned upon JMr. Churchill; but whether the occasion was too great, or that his desire to satisfy the raised expectation of the public was too high strained, or that the time was out of joint, or that he was out of sorts, the fact was he could find no name. Beauclerc, who had not yet tried the chair, sank into its luxurious depth, and leaning back, asked if it might not be appropriately called the ' Sleepy-hollow.' 'Sleepy-hollow!' repeated Lady Cecilia, ' excellent f and by acclamation ' Sleepy-hollow ' was approved ; but when Beauclerc was invited to the honours of the sitting, he declined, declaring that the name was not his invention, only his re- collection ; it had been given by a friend of his to some such easy chair. This magnanimity was too much for Horace ; he looked at his watch, found it was bed-time, pushed the chair out of his way, and departed ; Beauclerc, the first and last idea in this his day of mortifications. Seeing a man subject to these petty irritations lowers him in the eyes of woman. For that susceptibility of temper arising from the jealousy of love, even when excited by trifles, woman makes all reasonable, all natural allowance ; but for the jealousy of self-love she has no pity. Unsuited to the manly character ! — so Helen thought, and so every woman thinks. CHAPTER XVI It was expected by all who had witnessed his discomfiture and his parting push to the chair, that Mr. Churchill would be off early in the morning — such was his wont when he was disturbed in vanity : but he reappeared at breakfast. This day was a good day with Horace ; he determined it should be so, and though it was again a wet day, he now showed that he could rule the weather of his own humour, when intensity of will was wakened by rivalry. He made himself most agreeable, and the man of yesterday was for- i6o HELEN gotten or remembered only as a foil to the man of to-day. The words he so much loved to hear, and to which he had so often surreptitiously listened, were now repeated, ' No one can be so agreeable as Horace Churchill is on his good days ! ' Bright he shone out, all gaiety and graciousness ; the cachet de faveur was for all, but its finest impression was for Helen. He tried flattery, and wit, each playing on the other with reflected and reflecting lustre, for a woman naturally says to herself, ' When this man has so much wit, his flattery even must be worth something.' And another day came, and another, and another party of friends filled the house, and still Mr. Churchill remained, and was now the delight of all. As far as concerned his successes in society, no one was more ready to join in applause than Beauclerc ; but when Helen was in question he was different, though he had reasoned himself into the belief that he could not yet love Miss Stanley, therefore he could not be jealous. But he had been glad to observe that she had from the first seemed to see what sort of a person Mr. Churchill was. She was now only amused, as everybody must be, but she would never be interested by such a man as Horace Churchill, a wit without a soul. If she were — why he could never feel any further interest about her — that was all ! So it went on ; and now Lady Cecilia was as much amused as she expected by these daily jealousies, conflicts, and com- parisons, the feelings perpetually tricking themselves out, and strutting about, calling themselves judgments, like the servants in Gil Bias in their masters' clothes, going about as counts, dukes, and grandees. 'Well, really,' said Lady Cecilia to Helen, one day, as she was standing near her tambour frame, ' you are an industrious creature, and the only very industrious person I ever could bear. I have myself a natural aversion to a needle, but that tambour needle I can better endure than a common one, be- cause, in the first place, it makes a little noise in the world ; one not only sees but hears it getting on ; one finds that without dragging it draws at every link a lengthened chain.' ' It is called chainstitch, is it not?' said the aide-de-camp ; ' and Miss Stanley is working on so famously fast at it she will have us all in her chains by and by.' M i6i HELEN ' Bow, Miss Stanley,' said Lady Cecilia ; ' that pretty com- pliment deserves at least a bow, if not a look-up.' ' I should prefer a look-down, if I were to choose,' said Churchill. ' Beggars must not be choosers,' said the aide-de-camp. ' But the very reason I can bear to look at you working, Helen,' continued Lady CeciUa, ' is, because you do look up so often — so refreshingly. The professed Notables I detest — those who never raise their eyes from their everlasting work ; whatever is said, read, thought, or felt, is with them of secondary importance to that bit of muslin in which they are making holes, or that bit of canvas on which they are perpetrating such figures or flowers as nature scorns to look upon. I did not mean anything against you, mamma, I assure you,' con- tinued Cecilia, turning to her mother, who was also at her em- broidering frame, ' because, though you do work, or have work before you, to do you justice, you never attend to it in the least.' Thank you, my dear Cecilia,' said Lady Davenant, smiling ; ' I am, indeed, a sad bungler, but still I shall always maintain a great respect for work and workers, and I have good reasons for it.' ' And so have 1,' said Lord Davenant. ' I only wish that men who do not know what to do with their hands were not ashamed to sew. If custom had but allowed us this resource, how many valuable lives might have been saved, how many rich ennuy^s would not have hung themselves, even in November ! What years of war, what overthrow of empires, might have been avoided, if princes and sultans, instead of throwing handkerchiefs, had but hemmed them ! ' ' No, no,' said Lady Davenant ; ' recollect that the race of Spanish kings has somewhat deteriorated since they exchanged the sword for the tambour frame. We had better have things as they are : leave us the privilege of the needle, and what a valuable resource it is ; sovereign against the root of all evil — an antidote both to love in idleness and hate in idleness — which is most to be dreaded, let those who have felt both decide. I think we ladies must be allowed to keep the privilege of the needle to ourselves, humble though it be, for we must allow it is a good one.' ' Good at need,' said Churchill. ' There is an excellent print, by Bouck, I believe, of an old woman beating the devil 162 HELEN with a distaff ; distaffs have been out of fashion with spinsters ever since, I fancy.' ' But as she was old, Churchill,' said Lord Davenant, 'might not your lady have defied his black majesty without her distaff?' ' His black majesty ! I admire your distinction, my lord," said Churchill, ' but give it more emphasis ; for all kings are not black in the eyes of the fair, it is said, you know.' And here he began an anecdote of regal scandal in which Lady Cecilia stopped him — ' Now, Horace, I protest against your beginning with scandal so early in the morning. None of your on dits, for decency's sake, before luncheon ; wait till evening.' Churchill coughed, and shrugged, and sighed, and declared he would be temperate ; he would not touch a character, upon his honour ; he would only indulge in a few little personalities ; it could not hurt any lady's feelings that he should criticise or praise absent beauties. So he just made a review of all he could recollect, in answer to a question one of the officers. Captain Warmsley, had asked him, and which, in an absent fit, he had had the ill -manners yesterday, as now he re- collected, not to answer — Whom he considered as altogether the handsomest woman of his acquaintance ? Beauclerc was now in the room, and Horace was proud to display, before him in particular, his infinite knowledge of all the fair and fashion- able, and all that might be admitted fashionable without being fair — all that have the je ne sais quoi which is than beauty dearer. As one conscious of his power to consecrate or desecrate, by one look of disdain or one word of praise, he stood ; and beginning at the lowest conceivable point, his uttermost notion of want of beauty — his laid ideal, naming one whose image, no doubt, every charitable imagination will here supply, Horace next fixed upon another for his mediocrity point — what he should call 'just well enough' — assez bien, assez — just up to the Bellasis motto, ^ Bonne et belle assez.' Then, in the ascending scale, he rose to those who, in common parlance, may be called charming, fascinating ; and still for each he had his fastidious look and depreciating word. Just keeping within the verge,!Horace, without exposing himself to the ridicule of coxcombry, ended by sighing for that being ' made of every creature's best ' — perfect, yet free from the curse of perfection. Then, suddenly turning to Beauclerc, and tapping J 63 UjJiM s HELEN him on the shoulder — ' Do give us your notions — to what sort of a body or mind, now, would you willingly bend the knee ? ' Beauclerc could not or would not tell — ' I only know that whenever I bend the knee,' said he, 'it will be because I cannot help it ! ' Beauclerc could not be drawn out either by Churchill's persiflage or flattery, and he tried both, to talk of his tastes or opinions of women. He felt too much perhaps about love to talk much about it. This all agreed well in Helen's imagina- tion with what Lady Cecilia had told her of his secret engage- ment. She was sure he was thinking of Lady Blanche, and that he could not venture to describe her, lest he should betray himself and his secret. Then, leaving Churchill and the talkers, he walked up and down the room alone, at the farther side, seeming as if he were recollecting some lines which he repeated to himself, and then stopping before Lady Cecilia, repeated to her, in a very low voice, the following : — ' I saw her upon nearer view, A spirit, yet a woman too ! Her household motions light and free. And steps of virgin liberty ; A countenance in which did meet Sweet records, promises as sweet ; A creature not too bright or good For human nature's daily food ; For transient sorrows, simple wiles, Praise, blame, love, kisses, tears, and smiles.' Helen thought Lady Blanche must be a charming creature if she was like this picture ; but somehow, as she afterwards told Lady Cecilia, she had formed a different idea of Lady Blanche Forrester. Cecilia smiled and asked, ' How ? different how ? ' Helen did not exactly know, but altogether she had imagined that she must be more of a heroine, or perhaps more of a woman of rank and fashion. She had not formed any exact idea — but different altogether from this description. Lady Cecilia again smiled, and said, ' Very natural ; and after all not very certain that the Lady Blanche is like this picture, which was not drawn for her or from her assuredly — a. re- semblance found only in the imagination, to which we are, all of us, more or less, dupes ; and tant mieux say I — tant pis says mamma — and all mothers.' 165 HELEN ' There is one thing I like better in Mr. Beauclerc's manners than in Mr. Churchill,' said Helen. ' There are a hundred I like better,' said Lady Cecilia, ' but what is your one thing ? ' ' That he always speaks of women in general with respect — as if he had more confidence in them, and more dependence upon them for his happiness. Now Mr. Churchill, with all the adoration he professes, seems to look upon them as idols that he can set up or pull down, bend the knee to or break to pieces, at pleasure — I could not like a man for a friend who had a bad, or even a contemptuous, opinion of women — could you, Cecilia ? ' ' Certainly not,' Lady Cecilia said ; ' the General had always, naturally, the greatest respect for women. Whatever prejudices he had taken up had been only caught from others, and lasted only till he had got rid of the impression of certain " untoward circumstances." ' Even a grave, serious dislike, both Lady Cecilia and Helen agreed that they could bear better than that persiflage which seemed to mock even while it most professed to admire. Horace presently discovered the mistakes he had made in his attempts, and repaired them as fast as he could by his infinite versatility. The changes shaded off with a skill which made them run easily into each other. He perceived that Mr. Beauclerc's respectful air and tone were preferred, and he now laid himself out in the respectful line, adding, as he flattered himself, something of a finer point, more polish in whatever he said, and with more weight of authority. But he was mortified to find that it did not produce the expected effect, and, after having done the respectful one morning, as he fancied, in the happiest manner, he was vexed to perceive that he not only could not raise Helen's eyes from her work, but that even Lady Davenant did not attend to him : and that, as he was rounding one of his best periods, her looks were directed to the other side of the room, where Beauclerc sat apart ; and presently she called to him, and begged to know what it was he was reading. She said she quite envied him the power he possessed of being rapt into future times or past, completely at his author's bidding, to be transported how and where he pleased. Beauclerc brought the book to her, and put it into her i66 HELEN hand. As she took it she said, ' As we advance in life, it becomes more and more difficult to find in any book the sort of enchanting, entrancing interest which we enjoyed when hfe, and books, and we ourselves, were new. It were vain to try and settle whether the fault is most in modern books, or in our ancient selves ; probably not in either : the fact is, that not only does the imagination cool and weaken as we grow older, but we become, as we live on in this world, too much engrossed by the real business and cares of life, to have feeling or time for factitious, imaginary interests. But why do I say factitious ? while they last, the imaginative interests are as real as any others.' 'Thank you,' said Beauclerc, 'for doing justice to poor imagination, whose pleasures are surely, after all, the highest, the most real, that we have, unwarrantably as they have been decried both by metaphysicians and physicians.' The book which had so fixed Beauclerc's attention was Segur's History of Napoleoris Russian Campaign. He was at the page where the burning of Moscow is described — the picture of Buonaparte's despair, when he met resolution greater than his own, when he felt himself vanquished by the human mind, by patriotism, by virtue — virtue in which he could not believe, the existence of which, with all his imagination, he could not conceive : the power which his indomitable will could not conquer. Beauclerc pointed to the account of that famous inscription on the iron gate of a church which the French found still standing, the words written by Rostopchin after the burning of his ' delightful home.' ' Frenchmen, I have been eight years in embellishing this residence; I have lived in it happily in the bosom of my family. The inhabitants of this estate (amounting to seventeen hundred and twenty) have quitted it at your approach; and I have, with my own hands, set fire to my own house, to prevent it from being polluted by your presence.^ ' See what one, even one, magnanimous individual can do for his country,' exclaimed Beauclerc. 'How little did this sacrifice cost him! Sacrifice do I say? it was a pride — a pleasure.' Churchill did not at all like the expression of Helen's countenance, for he perceived she sympathised with Beauclerc's 167 HELEN enthusiasm. He saw that romantic enthusiasm had more charm for her than wit or fashion ; and now he meditated another change of style. He would try a noble style. He resolved that the first convenient opportunity he would be a little romantic, and perhaps, even take a touch at chivalry, a burst like Beauclerc, but in a way of his own, at the degeneracy of modern times. He tried it — but it was quite a failure ; Lady Cecilia, as he overheard, whispered to Helen what was once so happily said — 'AA/ le pauvre ho mine / cotmne il se batte les fiancs cPun enthoudasme de commande.' Horace was too clever a man to persist in a wrong line, or one in which his test of right, success, did not crown his endeavours. If this did not do, something else would — should. It was impossible that with all his spirit of resource he should ultimately fail. To please, and to make an im- pression on Helen, a greater impression than Beauclerc — to annoy Beauclerc, in short, was still, independently of all serious thoughts, the utmost object of Churchill's endeavours. CHAPTER XVII About this time a circumstance occurred, which seemed to have nothing to do with Churchill, or Beauclerc, but which eventually brought both their characters into action and passion. Lord Davenant had purchased, at the sale of Dean Stanley's pictures, several of those which had been the Dean's favourites, and which, independently of their positive merit, were peculiarly dear to Helen. He had ordered that they should be sent down to Clarendon Park ; at first, he only begged house-room for them from the General while he and Lady Davenant were in Russia ; then he said that in case he should never return he wished the pictures should be divided between his two dear children, Cecilia and Helen ; and that, to prevent disputes, he would make the distribution of them himself now, and in the kindest and most playful manner he allotted them to each, always finding some excellent reason for giving i68 HELEN to Helen those which he knew she Hked best ; and then there was to be a hanging committee, for hanging the pictures, which occasioned a great deal of talking, Beauclerc always thinking most of Helen, or of what was really best for the paintings ; Horace most of himself and his amateurship. Among these pictures were some fine Wouvermans, and other hunting and hawking pieces, and one in particular of the duchess and her ladies, from Don Quixote. Beauclerc, who had gone round examining and admiring, stood fixed when he came to this picture, in which he fancied he dis- covered in one of the figures some likeness to Helen ; the lady had a hawk upon her wrist. Churchill came up eagerly to the examination, with glass at eye. He could not discern the slightest resemblance to Miss Stanley ; but he was in haste to bring out an excellent observation of his own, which he had made his own from a Quarterly Review, illustrating the advantage it would be to painters to possess knowledge, even of kinds seemingly most distant from the line of their profession. ' For instance now, a priori, one should not insist upon a great painter's being a good ornithologist, and yet, for want of being something of a bird-fancier, look here what he has done — quite absurd, a sort of hawk introduced, such as never was or could be at any hawking affair in nature : would not sit upon lady's wrist or answer to her call — would never fly at a bird. Now you see this is a ridiculous blunder.' While Churchill plumed himself on this critical remark. Captain Warmsley told of who still kept hawks in England, and of the hawking parties he had seen and heard of — ' even this year, that famous hawking in Wiltshire, and that other in Norfolk.' Churchill asked Warmsley if he had been at Lord Bemer's when Landseer was there studying the subject of his famous hawking scene. ' Have you seen it. Lady Cecilia ? ' continued he ; 'it is beautiful ; the birds seem to be absolutely coming out of the picture ' ; and he was going on with some of his connoisseurship, and telling of his mortification in having missed the purchase of that picture ; but Warmsley got back to the hawking he had seen, and he became absolutely eloquent in describing the sport. Churchill, though eager to speak, hstened with tolerably 169 HELEN polite patience till Warmsley came to what he had forgot to mention, — to the label with the date of place and year that is put upon the heron's leg ; to the heron brought from Denmark, where it had been caught, with the label of having been let fly from Lord Berner's ; ' for,' continued he, ' the heron is always to be saved if possible, so, when it is down, and the hawk over it, the falconer has some raw beef ready minced, and lays it on the heron's back, or a pigeon, just killed, is sometimes used ; the hawk devours it, and the heron, quite safe, as soon as it recovers from its fright, mounts slowly upward and returns to its heronry.' Helen listened eagerly, and so did Lady Cecilia, who said, ' You know, Helen, our favourite Washington Irving quotes that in days of yore " a lady of rank did not think herself completely equipped in riding forth, unless she had her tassel- gentel held by jesses on her deUcate hand.'" Before her words were well finished, Beauclerc had decided what he would do, and the business was half done that is well begun. He was at the library table, writing as fast as pen could go, to give carte blanche to a friend to secure for him immediately a whole hawking establishment which Warmsley had mentioned, and which was now upon public sale, or pri- vately to be parted with by the present possessor. At the very moment when Beauclerc was signing and seal- ing at one end of the room, at the other Horace Churchill, to whom something of the same plan had occurred, was charm- ing Lady Cecilia Clarendon by hinting to her his scheme — anticipating the honour of seeing one of his hawks borne upon her dehcate wrist. Beauclerc, after despatching his letter, came up just in time to catch the sound and the sense, and took Horace aside to tell him what he had done. Horace looked vexed, and haughtily observed that he conceived his place at Erlesmede was better calculated for a hawking party than most places in England ; and he had already announced his intentions to the ladies. The way was open to him — but Beauclerc did not see why he should recede ; the same post might carry both their letters — both their orders.' ' How far did your order go, may I ask ? ' said Churchill. ' Carte blanche.' Churchill owned, with a sarcastic smile, that he was not 170 HELEN prepared to go quite so far. He was not quite so young as Granville ; he, unfortunately, had arrived at years of discre- tion — he said unfortunately ; without ironical reservation, he protested from the bottom of his heart he considered it as a misfortune to have become that slow circumspect sort of crea- ture which looks before it leaps. Even though this might save him from the fate of the man who was in Sicily, still he con- sidered it as unfortunate to have lost so much of his natural enthusiasm. ' Natural enthusiasm ! ' Beauclerc could not help repeating to himself, and he went on his own way. It must be confessed, as even Beauclerc's best friends allowed, counting among them Lady Davenant and his guardian, that never was man of sense more subject to that kind of temporary derangement of the reasoning powers which results from being what is called bit by a fancy ; he would then run on straight forward, without look- ing to the right or the left, in pursuit of his object, great or small. That hawking establishment now in view completely shut out, for the moment, all other objects ; ' of tercels and of lures he talks ' ; and before his imagination were hawking scenes, and Helen with a hawk on her wrist, looking most graceful — a hawk of his own training it should be. Then, how to train a hawk became the question. While he was wait- ing for the answer to his carte blanche, nothing better, or so good, could be done, as to make himself master of the whole business, and for this purpose he found it essential to consult every book on falconry that could be found in the hbrary, and a great plague he became to everybody in the course of this book-hunt. ' What a bore ! ' Warmsley might be excused for muttering deep and low between the teeth. General Clarendon sighed and groaned. Lady Davenant bore and forbore philo- sophically — it was for Beauclerc ; and to her great philosophy she gave all the credit of her indulgent partiality. Lady Cecilia, half-annoyed yet ever good-natured, carried her complaisance so far as to consult the catalogue and book-shelves sundry times in one hour ; but she was not famous for patience, and she soon resigned him to a better friend — Helen, the most indefatigable of book-hunters. She had been well trained to it by her uncle ; had been used to it all her life ; and really took pleasure in the tiresome business. She assured 171 HELEN Beauclerc it was not the least trouble, and he thought she looked beautiful when she said so. Whosoever of the male kind, young, and of ardent, not to say impatient, spirit, has ever been aided and abetted in a sudden whim, assisted, for- warded, above all, sympathised with, through all the changes and chances of a reigning fancy, may possibly conceive how charming, and more charming every hour, perhaps minute, Helen became in Beauclerc's eyes. But, all in the way of friendship observe. Perfectly so — on her part, for she could not have another idea, and it was for this reason she was so much at her ease. He so understood it, and, thoroughly a gentleman, free from coxcombry, as he was, and interpreting the language and manners of women with instinctive delicacy, they went on delightfully. Churchill was on the watch, but he was not alarmed ; all was so undisguised and frank, that now he began to feel assured that love on her side not only was, but ever would be, quite out of the question. Beauclerc was, indeed, in the present instance, really and truly intent upon what he was about ; and he pursued the His- tory of Falconry, with all its episodes, from the olden time of the Boke of St. Alban's down to the last number of the Sport- ing Magazine, including Colonel Thornton's latest flight, with the adventures of his red falcons, Miss M'Ghee and Lord Townsend, and his red tercels, Messrs. Croc Franc and Craignon ; — not forgetting that never-to-be forgotten hawking of the Emperor Arambombamboberus with Trebizonian eagles, on the authority of a manuscript in the Grand Siguier's library. Beauclerc had such extraordinary dependence upon the sympathy of his friends, that, when he was reading anything that interested him, no matter what they might be doing, he must have their admiration for what charmed him. He brought his book to Lord Davenant, who was writing a letter. ' Listen, oh listen ! to this pathetic lament of the falconer, — " Hawks, heretofore the pride of royalty, the insignia of nobility, the ambassador's present, the priest's indulgence, companion of the knight, and nursling of the gentle mistress, are now uncalled for and neglected." ' ' Ha ! very well that,' said good-natured Lord Davenant, stopping his pen, dipping again, dotting, and going on. Then Beauclerc passaged to Lady Davenant, and, interrupt- ing her in Scott's Lives of the Novelists, on which she was 172 HELEN deeply intent, 'Allow me, my dear Lady Davenant, though you say you are no great topographer, to show you this, it is so curious ; this royal falconer's proclamation — Henry the Eighth's — to preserve his partridges, pheasants, and herons, from his palace at Westminster to St. Giles's in the Fields, and from thence to Islington, Hampstead, and Highgate, under penalty for every bird killed of imprisonment, or whatever other punish- ment to his highness may seem meet.' Lady Davenant vouchsafed some suitable remark, consonant to expectation, on the changes of times and places, and men and manners, and then motioned the quarto away, with which motion the quarto reluctantly complied ; and then following Lady Cecilia from window to window, as she tended her flowers, he would insist upon her hearing the table of precedence for hawks. She, who never cared for any table of precedence in her life, even where the higher animals were concerned, would only undertake to remember that the merlin was a lady's hawk, and this only upon condition that she should have one to sit upon her wrist like the fair ladies in Wouvermans' pictures. But further, as to Peregrine, Gerfalcon, or Gerkin, she would hear nought of them, nor could she listen, though Granville earnestly exhorted, to the several good reasons which make a falcon dislike her master — 1st, If he speak rudely to her. 2nd, If he feed her carelessly. Before he could get thirdly out. Lady Cecilia stopped him, declaring that in all her hfe she never could listen to anything that began ^I'l'Ca. first and secondly — reasons especially. Horace, meanwhile, looked superior down, and thought with ineffable contempt of Beauclerc's htde skill in the arts of conversation, thus upon unwilling ears to squander anecdotes which would have done him credit at some London dinner. ' What I could have made of them ! and may make of them yet,' thought he ; ' but some there are, who never can contrive, as some others cleverly do, to ride their hobby-horses to good purpose and good effect ;— now Beauclerc's hobbies, I plainly see, will always run away with him headlong, cost him dear certainly, and, may be, leave him in the mire at last.' What this fancy was to cost him, Beauclerc did not yet know. Two or three passages in the Sporting Magazine had given some hints of the expense of this ' most delectable of all 173 HELEN country contentments,' which he had not thought it necessary to read aloud. And he knew that the late Lord Orford, an ardent pursuer of this ' royal and noble ' sport, had expended one hundred a-year on every hawk he kept, each requiring a separate attendant, and being moreover indulged in an excursion to the Continent every season during moulting-time : but Beauclerc said to himself he had no notion of humouring his hawks to that degree ; they should, aristocratic birds though they be, content themselves in England, and not pretend to ' damn the climate like a lord.' And he flattered himself that he should be able to pursue his fancy more cheaply than any of his predecessors ; but as he had promised his guardian that, after the indulgence granted him in the Beltravers cause, he could not call upon him for any more extraordinary supplies, he resolved, in case the expense exceeded his ways and means, to sell his hunters, and so indulge in a new love at the expense of an old one. The expected pleasure of the first day's hawking was now bright in his imagination ; the day was named, the weather promised well, and the German cadgers and trainers who had been engaged, and who, along with the whole establishment, were handed over to Beauclerc, were to come down to Clarendon Park, and Beauclerc was very happy teaching the merlins to sit on Lady Cecilia's and on Miss Stanley's wrist. Helen's voice was found to be peculiarly agreeable to the hawk, who, as Beauclerc observed, loved, like Lear, that excellent thing in woman, a voice ever soft, gentle, and low. The ladies were to wear some pretty dresses for the occasion, and all was gaiety and expectation ; and Churchill was mortified, when he saw how well the thing was likely to take, that he was not to be the giver of the fete, especially as he observed that Helen was particularly pleased — when, to his inexpressible surprise, Granville Beauclerc came to him, a few days before that appointed for the hawking-party, and said that he had changed his mind, that he wished to get rid of the whole concern — that he should be really obliged to Churchill if he would take his engagement off his hands. The only reason he gave was, that the establishment would altogether be more than he could afford, he found he had other calls for money, which were incompatible with his fancy, and therefore he would give it up, 174 HELEN Churchill obliged him most willingly by taking the whole upon himself, and he managed so to do in a very ingenious way, without incurring any preposterous expense. He was acquainted with a set of rich, fashionable young men, who had taken a sporting lodge in a neighbouring county, who desired no better than to accede to the terms proposed, and to dis- tinguish themselves by giving a flte out of the common line, while Churchill, who understood, like a true man of the world, the worldly art of bargaining, contrived, with off-hand gentle- manlike jockeying, to have every point settled to his own convenience, and he was to be the giver of the entertainment to the ladies at Clarendon Park. When this change in affairs was announced, Lady Cecilia, the General, Lady Davenant, and Helen, were all, in various degrees, surprised, and each tried to guess what could have been the cause of Beauclerc's sudden relinquishment of his purpose. He was — very extraordinary for him — impenetrable : he adhered to the words ' I found I could not afford it.' His guardian could not believe in this wonderful prudence, and was almost certain ' there must be some imprudence at the bottom of it all.' Granville neither admitted nor repelled that accusation. Lady Cecilia worked away with perpetual little strokes, hopirig to strike out the truth, laut, as she said, you might as well have worked at an old flint. Nothing was elicited from him, even by Lady Davenant ; nor did the collision of all their opinions throw any light upon the matter. Meanwhile the day for the hawking-party arrived. Churchill gave the fHe, and Beauclerc, as one of the guests, attended and enjoyed it without the least appearance even of disappoint- ment ; and, so far from envying Churchill, he assisted in remedying any little defects, and did all he could to make the whole go off well. The party assembled on a rising ground ; a flag was dis- played to give notice of the intended sport ; the falconers appeared, picturesque figures in their green jackets and their long gloves, and their caps plumed with herons' feathers — some with the birds on their wrists — one with the frame over his shoulder upon which to set the hawk. Set, did we say ? — no : ' cast your hawk on the perch ' is, Beauclerc observed, the correct term ; for, as Horace sarcastically remarked, Mr. 175 HELEN Beauclerc might be detected as a novice in the art by his over- exactness ; his too correct, too attic, pronunciation of the hawking language. But Granville readily and gaily bore all this ridicule and raillery, sure that it would neither stick nor stain, enjoying with all his heart the amusement of the scene — the assembled ladies, the attendant cavaliers ; the hood- winked hawks, the ringing of their brass bells ; the falconers anxiously watching the clouds for the first appearance of the bird ; their skill in loosening the hoods, as, having but one hand at liberty, they used their teeth to untie the string. And now the hoods are off, and the hawks let fly. They were to fly many casts of hawks this day : the first flight was after a curlew ; and the riding was so hard, so dangerous, from the broken nature of the ground, that the ladies gave it up, and were contented to view the sport from the eminence where they remained. And now there was a question to be decided among the sportsmen as to the comparative rate of riding at a fox-chase, and in ' the short, but terrifically hard gallop, with the eyes raised to the clouds, which is necessary for the full enjoyment of hawking ' ; and then the gentlemen, returning, gathered round the ladies, and the settling the point, watches in hand, and bets depending, added to the interest of flight the first, and Churchill, master of the revels, was in the highest spirits. But presently the sky was overcast, the morning lowered, the wind rose, and changed was Churchill's brow ; there is no such thing as hawking against the wind — that capricious wind ! ' Curse the wind ! ' cried Churchill ; ' and confusion seize the fellow who says there is to be no more hawking to-day ! ' The chief falconer, however, was a phlegmatic German, and proper -behaved, as good falconers should be, who, as ' Old Tristram's booke ' has it, even if a bird should be lost, should never swear, and only say, ' Dieii soil loue,' and ' remember that the mother of hawks is not dead.' But Horace, in the face of reason and in defiance of his German counsellors, insisted upon letting fly the hawks in this high wind ; and it so fell out that, in the first place, all the terms he used in his haste and spleen were wrong ; and in the next, that the quarry taking down the wind, the horsemen could not keep up with the hawks ; the falconers in great 176 HELEN alarm called to them by the names they gave them — 'Miss Didlington,' 'Lord Berners.' 'Ha! Miss Didlington's ofF; off, with Blucher, and Lady Kirby, and Lord Berners, and all of 'em after her.' Miss Didlington flew fast and far, and farther still, till she and all the rest were fairly out of sight lost, lost, lost ! ' And as fine a cast of hawks they were as ever came from Germany ! ' — the falconers were in despair, and Churchill saw that the fault was his ; and it looked so like cockney sportsman- ship ! If Horace had been in a towering rage, it would have been well enough ; but he only grew pettish, snappish, waspish : now none of those words ending in ish become a gentleman ; ladies always think so, and Lady Cecilia now thought so, and Helen thought so too, and Churchill saw it, and he grew pale instead of red, and that looks ugly in an angry man. But Beauclerc excused him when he was out of hearing ; and when others said he had been cross, and crosser than became the giver of a gala, Beauclerc pleaded well for him, that falconry has ever been known to be ' an extreme stirrer- up of the passions, being subject to mischances infinite.' However, a cold and hot collation under the trees for some, and under a tent for others, set all to rights for the present. Champagne sparkled, and Horace pledged and was pledged, and all were gay ; even the Germans at their own table, after their own fashion, with their Rhenish and their foaming ale, contrived to drown the recollection of the sad adventure of the truant hawks. And when all were refreshed and renewed in mind and body, to the hawking they went again. For now that The wind was laid, and all their fears asleep, there was to be a battle between heron and hawk, one of the finest sights that can be in all falconry. ' Look ! look ! Miss Stanley,' cried Granville ; ' look ! follow that high-flown hawk — that black speck in the clouds. Now ! now ! right over the heron ; and now she will canceleer — turn on her wing. Miss Stanley, as she comes down, whirl round, and balance herself — chanceUr. Now ! now look ! canceleer- ing gloriously ! ' But Helen at this instant recollected what Captain Warmsley had said of the fresh-killed pigeon, which the falconer in the N 177 HELEN nick of time is to lay upon the heron's back ; and now, even as the canceleering was going on — three times most beauti- fully, Helen saw only the dove, the white dove, which that black-hearted German held, his great hand round the throat, just raised to wring it. ' Oh, Beauclerc, save it, save it ! ' cried Lady Cecilia and Helen at once. Beauclerc sprang forward, and, had it been a tiger instead of a dove, would have done the same no doubt at that moment ; the dove was saved, and the heron killed. If Helen was pleased, so was not the chief falconer, nor any of the falconers, the whole German council in combustion ! and Horace Churchill deeming it ' rather extraordinary that any gentle- man should so interfere with other gentlemen's hawks.' Lady Cecilia stepped between, and never stepped in vain. She drew a ring from her finger — a seal ; it was the seal of peace — no great value — but a well-cut bird — a. bird for the chief falconer — a guinea-hen, with its appropriate cry, its polite motto, ' Come back, come back ' ; and she gave it as a pledge that the ladies would come back another day, and see another hawking ; and the gentlemen were pleased, and the aggrieved attendant falconers pacified by a promise of another heron from the heronry at Clarendon Park ; and the clouded faces brightened, and ' she smoothed the raven down of dark- ness till it smiled,' whatever that may mean ; but, as Milton said it, it must be sense as well as sound. At all events, in plain prose, be it understood that every- body was satisfied, even Mr. Churchill ; for Beauclerc had repaired for him, just in time, an error which would have been a blot on his gallantry of the day. He had forgotten to have some of the pretty gray hairs plucked from the heron, to give to the ladies to ornament their bonnets, but Beauclerc had secured them for him, and also two or three of those much- valued, smooth, black feathers, from the head of the bird, which are so much prized that a plume of them is often set with pearls and diamonds. Horace presented these most gracefully to Lady Cecilia and Helen, and was charmed with Lady Cecilia's parting compliments, which finished with the words ' Quite chivalrous.' And so, after all the changes and chances of weather, wind, and humour, all ended well, and no one rued the hawking of this day. 178 HELEN CHAPTER XVIII ' But all this time,' said Lady Davenant, ' you have not told me whether you have, any of you, found out what changed Granville's mind about this falconry scheme — why he so suddenly gave up the whole to Mr. Churchill. Such a point- blank weathercock turn of fancy in most young men would no more surprise me than the changes of those clouds in the sky, now shaped and now unshaped by the driving wind ; but in Granville Beauclerc there is always some reason for apparent caprice, and the reason is often so ingeniously wrong that it amuses me to hear it ; and even as a study in human nature, I am curious to know the simple fact.' But no one could tell the simple fact, no one could guess his reason, and from him it never would have been known — never could have been found out, but from a mistake — from a letter of thanks coming to a wrong person. One morning, when Helen was sitting in Lady Davenant's room with her, Lord Davenant came in, reading a letter, like one walking in his sleep. ' What is all this, my dear ? Can you explain it to me ? Some good action of yours, I suppose, for which I am to be thanked.' Lady Davenant looked at the letter. She had nothing to do with the matter, she said ; but, on second thoughts, exclaimed, ' This is Granville Beauclerc's doing, I am clear ! ' The letter was from Count Polianski, one of the poor banished Poles ; now poor, but who had been formerly master of a property estimated at about one hundred and sixty-five thousand available individuals. In attempting to increase the happiness and secure the liberty of these available individuals, the count had lost everything, and had been banished from his country — a man of high feeling as well as talents, and who had done all he could for that unhappy country, torn to pieces by demagogues from within and tyrants from without. Lady Davenant now recollected that Beauclerc had learned from her all this, and had heard her regretting that the circumstances in which Lord Davenant was placed at this 179 HELEN moment prevented the possibility of his affording this poor count assistance for numbers of his suffering fellow-country- men who had been banished along with him, and who were now in London in the utmost distress. Lady Davenant re- membered that she had been speaking to Granville on this subject the very day that he had abandoned his falconry project. ' Now I understand it all,' said she ; ' and it is like all I know and all I have hoped of him. These hundreds a-year which he has settled on these wretched exiles are rather better disposed of in a noble national cause, than in pampering one set of birds that they may fly at another set.' ' And yet this is done,' said Lord Davenant, ' by one of the much-reviled high-bred English gentlemen — among whom, let the much-reviling low-bred English democrats say what they will, we find every day instances of subscription for public purposes from private benevolence, in a spirit of princely charity to be found only in our own dear England — " England with all her faults." ' ' But this was a less ordinary sort of generosity of Gran- ville's,' said Lady Davenant, — ' the giving up a new pleasure, a new whim with all its gloss fresh upon it, full and bright in his eye.' ' True,' said Lord Davenant ; ' I never saw a strong-pulling fancy better thrown upon its haunches.' The white dove, whose life Helen had saved, was brought home by Beauclerc, and was offered to her and accepted. Whether she had done a good or a bad action, by thus saving the life of a pigeon at the expense of a heron, may be doubted, and will be decided according to the several tastes of ladies and gentlemen for herons or doves. As Lady Davenant remarked, Helen's humanity (or dove-anity, as Churchill called it) was of that equivocal sort which is ready to destroy one creature to save another which may happen to be a greater favourite. Be this as it may, the favourite had a friend upon the present occasion, and no less a friend than General Clarendon, who presented it with a marble basin, such as doves should drink out of, by right of long prescription. The General feared, he said, ' that this vase might be a little too deep — dangerously perhaps ' But Helen thought nothing could be altogether more perfect W^as offered to her and accented. HELEN in taste and in kindness — approving Beauclerc's kindness too — a remembrance of a day most agreeably spent. Churchill, to whom she looked as she said the last words, with all becoming politeness bowed and accepted the com- pliment, but with a reserve of jealousy on the brow ; and as he looked again at the dove, caressing and caressed, and then at the classic vase, he stood vexed, and to himself he said, — ' So this is the end of all my pains — hawking and all, " quite chivalrous " ! Beauclerc carries off the honours and pleasures of the day, and his present and his dove are to be all in all. Yet still,' continued he to himself in more con- solatory thought — ' she is so open in her very love for the bird, that it is plain she has not yet any love for the man. She would be somewhat more afraid to show it, delicate as she is. It is only friendship — honest friendship, on her side ; and if her affections be not engaged somewhere else — she may be mine : if — if I please — if — I can bring myself fairly to propose — we shall see — I shall think of it.' And now he began to think of it seriously. Miss Stanley's indifference to him, and the unusual difficulty which he found in making any impression, stimulated him in an extraordinary degree. Helen now appeared to him even more beautiful than he had at first thought her — ' Those eyes that fix so softly,' thought he, ' those dark eyelashes — that blush coming and going so beautifully — and there is a timid grace in all her motions, with that fine figure too — and that high-bred turn of the neck ! — altogether she is charming ! and she will be thought so ! — she must be mine ! ' She would do credit to his taste ; he thought she would, when she had a little more usage du monde, do the honours of his house well ; and it would be delightful to train her ! If he could but engage her affections, before she had seen more of the world, she might really love him for his own sake — and Churchill wished to be really loved, if possible, for his own sake ; but of the reality of modern love he justly doubted, especially for a man of his fortune and his age ; yet, with Helen's youth and innocence he began to think he had some chance of disinterested attachment, and he determined to bring out for her the higher powers of his mind — the better parts of his character. HELEN One day Lady Davenant had been speaking of London conversation. ' So brilliant,' said she, ' so short-lived, as my friend Lady Emmeline K once said, " London wit is like gas, which lights at a touch, and at a touch can be ex- tinguished " ; ' and Lady Davenant concluded with a com- pliment to him who was known to have this '■touch and go'' of good conversation to perfection. Mr. Churchill bowed to the compliment, but afterwards sighed, and it seemed an honest sigh, from the bottom of his heart. Only Lady Davenant and Helen were in the room, and turning to Lady Davenant he said, ' If I have it, I have paid dearly for it, more than it is worth, much too dearly, by the sacrifice of higher powers ; I might have been a very different person from what I am.' Helen's attention was instantly fixed ; but Lady Davenant suspected he was now only talking for effect. He saw what she thought — it was partly true, but not quite. He felt what he said at the moment ; and besides, there is always a sincere pleasure in speaking of oneself when one can do it without exposing oneself to ridicule, and with a chance of obtaining real sympathy. ' It was my misfortune,' he said, ' to be spoiled, even in childhood, by my mother.' As he pronounced the word ' mother,' either his own heart or Helen's eyes made him pause with a look of respectful tenderness. It was cruel of a son to blame the fond indulgence of a mother ; but the fact was, she brought him too forward early as a clever child, fed him too ' much with that sweet dangerous fostering dew of praise. The child — the man — must suffer for it afterwards. ' True, very true,' said Lady Davenant ; ' I quite agree with you.' ' I could do nothing without flattery,' continued he, pursuing the line of confession which he saw had fixed Lady Davenant's attention favourably. 'Unluckily, I came too early into possession of a large fortune, and into the London world, and I lapped the stream of prosperity as I ran, and it was sweet with flattery, intoxicating, and I knew it, and yet could not forbear it. Then in a London life everything is too stimulating over-exciting. If there are great advantages to men of science and literature in museums and public libraries, the 183 HELEN more than Avicenna advantages of having books come at will, and ministering spirits in waiting on all your pursuits — there is too much of everything except time, and too little of that. The treasures are within our reach, but we cannot clutch ; we have, but we cannot hold. We have neither leisure to be good nor to be great : who can think of living for posterity, when he can scarcely live for the day ? and sufficient for the day are never the hours thereof From want of time, and from the immense quantity that nevertheless must be known, comes the necessity, the unavoidable necessity, of being superficial.' 'Why should it be unavoidable necessity ? ' asked Lady Davenant. ' Because should waits upon must, in London always, if not elsewhere,' said Churchill. ' A conversation answer,' replied Lady Davenant. ' Yes, I allow it ; it is even so, just so, and to such tricks, such playing upon words, do the bad habits of London con- versation lead ' ; and Lady Davenant wondered at the courage of his candour, as he went on to speak of the petty jealousies, the paltry envy, the miserable selfish susceptibility generated by the daily competition of London society. Such dissensions, such squabbles — an ignoble but appropriate word — such deplorable, such scandalous squabbles among literary, and even among scientific men. ' And who,' continued he, ' who can hope to escape in such a tainted atmosphere — an atmosphere overloaded with life, peopled with myriads of little buzzing stinging vanities ? It really requires the strength of Hercules, mind and body, to go through our labours, fashionable, political, bel esprit, altogether too much for mortal. In Parlia- ment, in politics, in the tug of war, you see how the strongest minds fail, come to untimely ' ' Do not touch upon that subject,' cried Lady Davenant, suddenly agitated. Then, commanding herself, she calmly added — ' As you are not now, I think, in Parliament, it cannot affect you. \Vhat were you saying ? — your health of mind and body, I think you said, you were sensible had been hurt by ' ' These straining, incessant competitions have hurt me. My health suffered first, then my temper. It was originally good, now, as you have seen, I am afraid ' — glancing at 184 HELEN Helen, who quickly looked down, ' I am afraid I am irritable.' There was an awkward silence. Helen thought it was for Lady Davenant to speak ; but Lady Davenant did not contradict Mr. Churchill. Now, the not contradicting a person who is abusing himself is one of the most heinous offences to self-love that can be committed ; and it often provokes false candour to pull off the mask and throw it in your face ; but either Mr. Horace Churchill's candour was true, or it was so well guarded at the moment that no such catastrophe occurred. ' Worse than this bad effect on my temper,' continued he, ' I feel that my whole mind has been deteriorated — my ambition dwindled to the shortest span — my thoughts con- tracted to the narrow view of mere effect ; what would please at the dinner-table or at the clubs — what will be thought of me by this literary coterie, or in that fashionable boudoir. And for this reputation de salon I have sacrificed all hope of other reputation, all power of obtaining it, all hope of ' (here he added a few words, murmured down to Lady Davenant's embroidery frame, yet still in such a tone that Helen could not help thinking he meant she should hear) — ' If I had a heart such as ' he paused, and, as if struck with some agonising thought, he sighed deeply, and then added — 'but I have not a heart worth such acceptance, or I would make the offer.' Helen was not sure what these words meant, but she now pitied him, and she admired his candour, which she thought was so far above the petty sort of character he had at first done himself the injustice to seem, and she seized the first opportunity to tell Beauclerc all Mr. Churchill had said to Lady Davenant and to her, and of the impression it had made upon them both. Beauclerc had often discussed Mr. Churchill's character with her, but she was disappointed when she saw that what she told made no agreeable impression on Beauclerc : at first he stood quite silent, and when she asked what he thought, he said — ' It's all very fine, very clever.' ' But it is all true,' said Helen. ' And I admire Mr. Churchill's knowing the truth so well and teUing it so candidly.' i8S HELEN ' Everything Mr. Churchill has said may be true — and yet I think the truth is not in him.' ' You are not usually so suspicious,' said Helen. ' If you had heard Mr. Churchill's voice and emphasis, and seen his look and manner at the time, I think you could not have doubted him.' The more eager she grew, the colder Mr. Beauclerc became. ' Look and manner, and voice and emphasis,' said he, ' make a great impression, I know, on ladies.' ' But what is your reason, Mr. Beauclerc, for disbelief.'' I have as yet only heard that you believe everything that Mr. Churchill said was true, and yet that you do not believe in his truth,' said Helen, in a tone of raillery. And many a time before had Beauclerc been the first to laugh when one of his own paradoxes stared him in the face ; but now he was more out of countenance than amused, and he looked seriously about for reasons to reconcile his seeming self-contradiction. ' In the first place, all those allusions and those metaphorical expressions, which you have so wonderfully well remembered, and which no doubt were worth remembering, all those do not give the idea of a man who is really feeling in earnest, and speaking the plain truth about faults, for which, if he felt at all, he must be too much ashamed to talk in such a grand style ; and to talk of them at all, except to most intimate friends, seems so unnatural, and quite out of character in a man who had expressed such horror of egotists, and who is so excessively circumspect in general.' ' Yes, but Mr. Churchill's forgetting all his little habits of circumspection, and all fear of ridicule, is the best proof of his being quite in earnest — that all he said was from his heart.' ' I doubt whether he has any heart,' said Beauclerc. ' Poor man, he said ' Helen began, and then re- collecting the words, ' or I would make the offer,' she stopped short, afraid of the construction they might bear, and then, ashamed of her fear, she coloured deeply. ' Poor man, he said ' repeated Beauclerc, fixing his eyes upon her ; ' what did he say, may I ask ? ' ' No, — ' said Helen ; ' I am not sure that I distinctly heard or understood Mr. Churchill.' i86 HELEN ' Oh, if there was any mystery '. ' Beauclerc begged pardon. And he went away very quickly. He did not touch upon the subject again, but Helen saw that he never forgot it ; and, by few words which she heard him say to Lady Davenant about his dislike to half- confidences, she knew he was displeased, and she thought he was wrong. She began to fear that his mistrust of Churchill arose from envy at his superior success in society ; and, though she was anxious to preserve her newly -acquired good opinion of Churchill's candour, she did not like to lose her esteem for Beauclerc's generosity. Was it possible that he could be seriously hurt at the readiness with which Mr. Churchill availed himself of any idea which Beauclerc threw out, and which he dressed up, and passed as his own ? Perhaps this might be what he meant by ' the truth is not in him.' She remembered one day when she sat between him and Beauclerc, and when he did not seem to pay the least attention to what Mr. Beauclerc was saying to her, yet, fully occupied as he had apparently been in talking for the company in general, he had through all heard Granville telling the Chinese fable of the ' Man in the Moon, whose business it is to knit together with an invisible silken cord those who are predestined for each other.' Presently, before the dessert was over, Helen found the ' Chinese Man in the Moon,' whom she thought she had all to herself, figuring at the other end of the table, and received with great applause. And was it possible that Beauclerc, with his abundant springs of genius, could grudge a drop thus stolen from him ? but without any envy in the case, he was right in considering such theft, however petty, as a theft, and right in despising the meanness of the thief. Such meanness was strangely incom- patible with Mr. Churchill's frank confession of his own faults. Could that confession be only for effect ? Her admiration had been sometimes excited by a particular happiness of thought, beauty of expression, or melody of lan- guage, in Mr. Churchill's conversation. Once Beauclerc had been speaking with enthusiasm of modern Greece, and his hopes that she might recover her ancient character ; and Mr. Churchill, as if admiring the enthusiasm, yet tempering it with better judgment, smiled, paused, and answered, ' But Greece is a dangerous field for a political speculator ; 187 HELEN the imagination produces an illusion resembling the beautiful appearances which are sometimes exhibited in the Sicilian straits ; the reflected images of ancient Grecian glory pass in a rapid succession before the mental eye ; and, delighted with the captivating forms of greatness and splendour, we forget for a moment that the scene is in reality a naked waste.' Some people say they can distinguish between a written and a spoken style, but this depends a good deal on the art of the speaker. Churchill could give a colloquial tone to a ready- written sentence, and could speak it with an off-hand grace, a carelessness which defied all suspicion of preparation ; and the look, and pause, and precipitation — each and all came in aid of the actor's power of perfecting the illusion. If you had heard and seen him, you would have believed that, in speaking this passage, the thought of the Fata Morgana rose in his mind at the instant, and that, seeing it pleased you, and pleased with it himself, encouraged by your look of intelligence, and borne along by your sympathy, the eloquent man followed his own idea with a happiness more than care, admirable in con- versation. A few days afterwards, Helen was very much surprised to find her admired sentence word for word in a book, from which Churchill's card fell as she opened it. Persons without a name Horace treated as barbarians who did not know the value of their gold ; and he seemed to think that, if they chanced to possess rings and jewels, they might be plucked from them without remorse, and converted to better use by some lucky civilised adventurer. Yet in his most suc- cessful piracies he was always haunted by the fear of discovery, and he especially dreaded the acute perception of Lady Dave- nant ; he thought she suspected his arts of appropriation, and he took the first convenient opportunity of sounding her opinion on this point. 'How I enjoy,' said he to Lady Cecilia, 'telling a good story to you, for you never ask if it is a fact. Now, in a good story, no one sticks to absolute fact ; there must be some little embellishment. No one would send his own or his friend's story into the world without " putting a hat on its head, and a stick into its hand," ' Churchill triumphantly quoted ; this time he did not steal. ' But,' said Lady Davenant, ' I find that even the pleasure I have in mere characteristic or humorous narration is heightened HELEN by my dependence on the truth — the character for truth — of the narrator.' Not only Horace Churchill, but almost everybody present, except Helen, confessed that they could not agree with her. The character for truth of the story-teller had nothing to do with his story, unless it was historique, or that he was to swear to it. ' And even if it were historique^ cried Horace, buoyed up at the moment by the tide in his favour, and floating out far- ther than was prudent — ' and even if it were historique, how much pleasanter is graceful fiction than grim, rigid truth ; and how much more amusing in my humble opinion ! ' ' Now,' said Lady Davenant, ' for instance, this book I am reading ' — (it was Dumont's Mimoires de Mirabeau) — ' this book which I am reading gives me infinitely increased pleasure, from my certain knowledge, my perfect conviction, of the truth of the author. The self-evident nature of some of the facts would support themselves, you may say, in some instances ; but my perceiving the scrupulous care he takes to say no more than what he knows to be true, my perfect reliance on the relater's private character for integrity, gives a zest to every anecdote he tells — a specific weight to every word of conversation which he repeats — appropriate value to every trait of wit or humour characteristic of the person he de- scribes. Without such belief, the characters would not have to me, as they now have, all the power, and charm, and life, of nature and reality. They are all now valuable as records of individual varieties that have positively so existed. While the most brilliant writer could, by fiction, have produced an effect, valuable only as representing the general average of human nature, but adding nothing to our positive knowledge, to the data from which we can reason in future.' Churchill understood Lady Davenant too well to stand quite unembarrassed as he listened ; and when she went on to say how differently she should have felt in reading these memoirs if they had been written by Mirabeau himself; with all hi? brilliancy, all his talents, how inferior would have been her enjoyment as well as instruction ; his shrinking conscience told him how this might all be applied to himself; yet, strange to say, though somewhat abashed, he was nevertheless flattered by the idea of a parallel between himself and Mirabeau. To 189 HELEN Mirabeauder was no easy task ; it was a certain road to noto- riety, if not to honest fame. But even in the better parts of his character, his liberality in money matters, his good-natured patronage of rising genius, the meanness of his mind broke out. There was a certain young poetess whom he had encouraged ; she happened to be sister to Mr. Mapletofft, Lord Davenant's secretary, and she had spoken with enthusiastic gratitude of Mr. Churchill's kind- ness. She was going to publish a volume of Sonnets under Mr. Churchill's patronage, and, as she happened to be now at some country town in the neighbourhood, he requested Lady Cecilia to allow him to introduce this young authoress to her. She was invited for a few days to Clarendon Park, and Mr. Churchill was zealous to procure subscriptions for her, and eager to lend the aid of his fashion and his literary reputation to bring forward the merits of her book. ' Indeed,' he whispered, ' he had given her some little help in the composition,' and all went well till, in an evil hour, Helen praised one of the sonnets rather too much — more, he thought, than she had praised another, which was his own. His jealousy wakened — he began to criticise his protegee's poetry. Helen defended her admira- tion, and reminded him that he had himself recommended these lines to her notice. ' Well ! — yes — I did say the best I could for the whole thing, and for her it is surprising — that is, I am anxious the publication should take. But if we come to compare — you know this cannot stand certain comparisons that might be made. Miss Stanley's own taste and judgment must perceive — when we talk of genius — that is quite out of the question, you know.' Horace was so perplexed between his philanthropy and his jealousy, his desire to show the one and his incapability of con- cealing the other, that he became unintelligible ; and Helen laughed, and told him that she could not now understand what his opinion really was. She was quite ready to agree with him, she said, if he would but agree with himself j this made him disagree still more with himself and unluckily with his better self, his benevolence quite gave way before his jealousy and ill-humour, and he vented it upon the book ; and, instead of prophecies of its success, he now groaned over ' sad careless lines,' — 'passages that lead to nothing,' — 'similes that will not hold when you come to examine them.' igo HELEN Helen pointed out in the dedication a pretty, a happy thought. Horace smiled, and confessed that was his own. What ! in the dedication to himself ? and in the blind- ness of his vanity he did not immediately see the absurdity. The more he felt himself in the wrong, of course the more angry he grew, and it finished by his renouncing the dedication altogether, declaring he would have none of it. The book and the lady might find a better patron. There are things which no man of real generosity could say or do, or think, put him in ever so great a passion. He would not be harsh to an inferior — a woman — a proiegie on whom he had conferred obligations ; but Mr. Churchill was harsh — he showed neither generosity nor feeling ; and Helen's good opinion of him sank to rise no more. Of this, however, he had not enough of the sympathy or penetration of feeling to be aware. CHAPTER XIX The party now at Clarendon Park consisted chiefly of young people. Among them were two cousins of Lady Cecilia's, whom Helen had known at Cecilhurst before they went abroad, while she was still almost a child. Lady Katrine Hawksby, the elder, was several years older than Cecilia. When Helen last saw her, she was tolerably well-looking, very fashionable, and remarkable for high spirits, with a love for quizzing, and for all that is vulgarly called fun, and a talent for ridicule, which she indulged at everybody's expense. She had always amused Cecilia, who thought her more diverting than really ill-natured ; but Helen thought her more ill-natured than diverting, never liked her, and had her own private reasons for thinking that she was no good friend to Cecilia : but now, in consequence either of the wear and tear of London life, or of a disappoint- ment in love or matrimony, she had lost the fresh plumpness of youth ; and gone too was that spirit of mirth, if not of good humour, which used to enliven her countenance. Thin and sallow, the sharp features remained, and the sarcastic without 191 HELEN the arch expression ; still she had a very fashionable air. Her pretensions to youth, as her dress showed, were not gone ; and her hope of matrimony, though declining, not set. Her many- years-younger sister, Louisa, now Lady Castlefort, was beau- tiful. As a girl, she had been the most sentimental, refined, delicate creature conceivable ; always talking poetry — and so romantic — with such a soft, sweet, die-away voice — lips apart — and such fine eyes, that could so ecstatically turn up to heaven, or be so cast down, charmingly fixed in contemplation : — and now she is married, just the same. There she is, established in the library at Clarendon Park, with the most sentimental fashionable novel of the day, beautifully bound, on the little rosewood table beside her, and a manuscript poem, a great secret, ' Love's Last Sigh,' in her bag with her smell- ing-bottle and embroidered handkerchief ; and on that beautiful arm she leaned so gracefully, with her soft languishing ex- pression ; so perfectly dressed too — handsomer than ever. Helen was curious to know what sort of man Lady Louisa had married, for she recollected that no hero of any novel that ever was read, or talked of, came up to her idea of what a hero ought to be, of what a man must be, whom she could ever think of loving. Cecilia told Helen that she had seen Lord Castlefort, but that he was not Lord Castlefort, or likely to be Lord Castlefort, at that time ; and she bade her guess, among all she could recollect having ever seen at Cecilhurst, who the man of Louisa's choice could be. Lady Katrine, with infinite forbearance, smiled, and gave no hint, while Helen guessed and guessed in vain. She was astonished when she saw him come into the room. He was a little deformed man, for whom Lady Louisa had always expressed to her companions a peculiar abhorrence. He had that look of conceit which unfortunately sometimes accompanies personal deformity, and which disgusts even Pity's self. Lord Castlefort was said to have declared himself made for love and fighting ! Helen remembered that kind-hearted Cecilia had often remonstrated for humanity's sake, and stopped the quizzing which used to go on in their private coteries, when the satirical elder sister would have it that le petit bossu was in love with Louisa. But what could make her marry him ? Was there anything within to make amends for the exterior ? Nothing — nothing that could ' rid him of the lump behind.' But superior to the 192 HELEN metamorphoses of love, or of fairy tale, are the metamorphoses of fortune. Fortune had suddenly advanced him to uncounted thousands and a title, and no longer le petit bossu. Lord Castle- fort obtained the fair hand, the very fair hand, of Lady Louisa Hawksby, plus belle que fee ! Still Helen could not believe that Louisa had married him voluntarily ; but Lady Ceciha assured her that it was voluntarily, quite voluntarily. ' You could not have so doubted had you seen the trousseau and the corbeille, for you know, '■'■ Le present fait oublier le futur." ' Helen could scarcely smile. ' But Louisa had feeling — really some,' continued Lady Cecilia ; ' but she could not afford to follow it. She had got into such debt, I really do not know what she would have done if Lord Castlefort had not proposed ; but she has some little heart, and I could tell you a secret ; but no, I will leave you the pleasure of finding it out.' ' It will be no pleasure to me,' said Helen. ' I never saw anybody so out of spirits,' cried Lady Cecilia, laughing, ' at another's unfortunate marriage, which all the time she thinks very fortunate. She is quite happy, and even Katrine does not laugh at him any longer, it is to be supposed ; it is no laughing matter now.' ' No indeed,' said Helen. ' Nor a crying matter either,' said Cecilia. ' Do not look shocked at me, my dear, 1 did not do it ; but so many do, and I have seen it so often, that I cannot wonder with such a fool- ish face of blame — I do believe, my dear Helen, that you are envious because Louisa is married before you ! for shame, my love ! Envy is a naughty passion, you know our Madame Bonne used to say ; but here's mamma, now talk to her about Louisa Castlefort, pray.' Lady Davenant took the matter with great coolness, was neither shocked nor surprised at this match, she had known so many worse ; Lord Castlefort, as well as she recollected, was easy enough to live with. 'And after all,' said she, 'it is better than what we see every day, the fairest of the fair know- ingly, willingly, giving themselves to the most profligate of the profligate. In short, the market is so overstocked with accom- plished young ladies on the one hand, and on the other men find wives and establishments so expensive, clubs so cheap and 193 HELEN so much more luxurious than any home, hberty not only so sweet but so fashionable, that their policy, their maxim, is, ' Marry not at all, or if marriage be ultimately necessary to pay debts and leave heirs to good names, marry as late as possible ' ; and thus the two parties with their opposite in- terests stand at bay, or try to outwit or outbargain each other. And if you wish for the moral of the whole affair, here it is : from the vulgar nursery-maids, with their broad sense and bad English, and the good or bad French of the governess, to the elegant innuendo of the drawing-room, all is working to the same effect ; dancing-masters, music-masters, and all the tribe, what is it all for, but to prepare young ladies for the grand event ; and to raise in them, besides the natural, a factitious, an abstract idea of good in being married ? Every girl in these days is early impressed with the idea that she must be married, that she cannot be happy unmarried. Here is an example of what 1 meant the other day by strength of mind ; it requires some strength of mind to be superior to such a foolish, vain, and vulgar belief.' 'It will require no great strength of mind in me,' said Helen, ' for I really never have formed such notions. They never were early put into my head ; my uncle always said a woman might be very happy unmarried. 1 do not think 1 shall ever be seized with a terror of dying an old maid.' 'You are not come to the time yet, my dear,' said Lady Davenant, smiling. ' Look at Lady Katrine ; strength of mind on this one subject would have saved her from being a prey to envy, and jealousy, and all the vulture passions of the mind. ' In the old French regime,' continued Lady Davenant, 'the young women were at least married safely out of their con- vents ; but our young ladies, with their heads full of high-flown poetry and sentimental novels, are taken out into the world before marriage, expected to see and not to choose, shown the most agreeable, and expected, doomed, to marry the most odious. But, in all these marriages for establishment, the wives who have least feeling are not only likely to be the happiest, but also most likely to conduct themselves well. In the first place, they do not begin with falsehood. If they have no hearts, they cannot pretend to give any to the husband, and that is better than having given them to somebody else. Husband and wife, in this case, clearly understand the terms of agree- 194 HELEN ment, expect, imagine no more than they have, and jog-trot they go on together to the end of life very comfortably.' 'Comfortably!' exclaimed Helen, 'it must be most miserable.' 'Not most miserable, Helen,' said Lady Davenant ; 'keep your pity for others ; keep your sighs for those who need them — for the heart which no longer dares to utter a sigh for itself, the faint heart that dares to love, but dares not abide by its choice. Such infatuated creatures, with the roots of feeling left aching within them, must take what opiates they can find ; and in after-life, through all their married existence, their prayer must be for indifference, and thankful may they be if that prayer is granted.' These words recurred to Helen that evening, when Lady Castlefort sang some tender and passionate airs ; played on the harp with a true Saint Cecilia air and attitude ; and at last, with charming voice and touching expression, sang her favourite — ' Too late for redress.' Both Mr. Churchill and Beauclerc were among the group of gentlemen ; neither was a stranger to her. Mr. Churchill admired and applauded as a connoisseur. Beauclerc listened in silence. Mr. Churchill entreated for more — more — and named several of his favourite Italian airs. Her ladyship really could not. But the slightest indication of a wish from Beauclerc was, without turning towards him, heard and attended to, as her sister failed not to remark and to make others remark. Seizing a convenient pause while Mr. Churchill was search- ing for some masterpiece. Lady Katrine congratulated her sister on having recovered her voice, and declared that she had never heard her play or sing since she was married till to-night. 'You may consider it as a very particular compliment, I assure you,' continued she, addressing herself so particularly to Mr. Beauclerc that he could not help being a little out of countenance, — ' I have so begged and prayed, but she was never in voice or humour, or heart, or something. Yesterday, even Castlefort was almost on his knees for a song, — were not you. Lord Castlefort ? ' Lord Castlefort pinched his pointed chin, and casting up an angry look, replied in a dissonant voice, — ' I do not remember ! ' 195 HELEN ' Tout voir, tout e^itendre, tout oublier^ whispered Lady Katrine to Mr. Churchill, as she stooped to assist him in the search for a music-book — ' Tout voir, tout entendre, tout oublier, should be the motto adopted by all married people.' Lady Castlefort seemed distressed, and turned over the leaves in such a flutter that she could not find anything, and she rose, in spite of all entreaties, leaving the place to her sister, who was, she said, ' so much better a musician and not so foolishly nervous.' Lady Castlefort said her ' voice always went away when she was at all ' There it ended as far as words went ; but she sighed, and retired so gracefully that all the gentlemen pitied her. There is one moment in which ill-nature sincerely repents — the moment when it sees pity felt for its victim. Horace followed Lady Castlefort to the ottoman, on which she sank. Beauclerc remained leaning on the back of Lady Katrine's chair, but without seeming to hear what she said or sang. After some time Mr. Churchill, not finding his attentions well received, or weary of paying them, quitted Lady Castlefort, but sat down by Helen ; and in a voice to be heard by her, but by no one else, he said — 'What a relief! — I thought I should never get away!' Then, favoured by a loud bravura of Lady Katrine's, he went on — ' That beauty, between you and me, is something of a bore — she — I don't mean the lady who is now screaming — she should always sing. Heaven blessed her with song, not sense — but here one is made so fastidious ! ' He sighed, and for some moments seemed to be given up to the duet which Lady Katrine and an officer were performing ; and then exclaimed, but so that Helen only could hear, — ' Merciful Heaven ! how often one wishes one had no ears : that Captain Jones must be the son of Stentor, and that lady ! — if angels sometimes saw themselves in a looking-glass when singing — there would be peace upon earth.' Helen, not liking to be the secret receiver of his contraband good things, was rising to change her place, when, softly detaining her, he said, ' Do not be afraid, no danger — trust me, for I have studied under Talma.' ' What can you mean ? ' ' I mean,' continued he, ' that Talma taught me the secret of his dying scenes — how every syllable of his dying words ig6 HELEN might be heard to the farthest part of the audience ; and I —give me credit for my ingenuity — know how, by reversing the art, to be perfectly inaudible at ten paces' distance, and yet, I trust, perfectly intelligible, always, to you.' Helen now rose decidedly, and retreated to a table at the other side of the room, and turned over some books that lay there — she took up a volume of the novel Lady Castlefort had been reading — Love unquestionable. She was surprised to find it instantly, gently, but decidedly drawn from her hand : she looked up — it was Beauclerc. ' I beg your pardon. Miss Stanley, but ' ' Thank you ! thank you ! ' said Helen ; ' you need not beg my pardon.' This was the first time Beauclerc had spoken in his friendly, cordial, natural manner, to her, since their incomprehensible misunderstanding. She was heartily glad it was over, and that he was come to himself again. And now they conversed very happily together for some time ; though what they said might not be particularly worth recording. Lady Katrine was at Helen's elbow before she perceived her 'looking for her sac ' ; and Lady Castlefort came for her third volume, and gliding off, wished to all ' Felice, felicissima noite.' Neither of these sisters had ever liked Helen ; she was too true for the one, and too good-natured for the other. Lady Katrine had always, even when she was quite a child, been jealous of Lady Cecilia's affection for Helen ; and now her indignation and disappointment were great at finding her established at Clarendon Park — to live with the Clarendons, to go out with Lady Cecilia. Now, it had been the plan of both sisters that Lady Katrine's present visit should be eternal. How they would ever have managed to fasten her ladyship upon the General, even if Helen had been out of the question, need not now be considered. Their disappointment and dislike to Helen were as great as if she had been the only obstacle to the fulfilment of their scheme. These two sisters had never agreed — -Doom'd by Fate To live in all the elegance of hate ; and since Lady Castlefort's marriage, the younger, the beautiful, being now the successful lady of the ascendant, the elder 197 HELEN writhed in all the combined miseries of jealousy and depend- ence, and an everyday lessening chance of bettering her condition. Lord Castlefort, too, for good reasons of his own, well remembered, detested Lady Katrine, and longed to shake her off. In this wish, at least, husband and wife united ; but Lady Castlefort had no decent excuse for her ardent im- patience to get rid of her sister. She had magnificent houses in town and country, ample room everywhere — but in her heart. She had the smallest heart conceivable, and the coldest ; but had it been ever so large, or ever so warm, Lady Katrine was surely not the person to get into it, or into any heart, male or female : there was the despair. ' If Katrine was but married — Mr. Churchill, suppose ? ' Faint was the suppose in Lady Castlefort's imagination. Not so the hope which rose in Lady Katrine's mind the moment she saw him here. ' How fortunate ! ' Her ladyship had now come to that no particular age, when a remarkable metaphysical phenomenon occurs ; on one particular subject hope increases as all probability of success decreases. This aberration of intellect is usually observed to be greatest in very clever women ; while Mr. Churchill, the flattered object of her present hope, knew how to manage with great innocence and modesty, and draw her on to overt acts of what is called flirtation. Rousseau says that a man is always awkward and miserable when placed between two women to whom he is making love. But Rousseau had never seen Mr. Churchill, and had but an imperfect idea of the dexterity, the ambiguity, that in our days can be successfully practised by an accomplished male coquette. Absolutely to blind female jealousy may be beyond his utmost skill ; but it is easy, as every day's practice shows, to keep female vanity pleasantly perplexed by ocular deception — to make her believe that what she really sees she does not see, and that what is unreal is reality : to make her, to the amuse- ment of the spectators, continually stretch out her hand to snatch the visionary good that for ever eludes her grasp, or changes, on near approach, to grinning mockery. This delightful game was now commenced with Lady Katrine, and if Helen could be brought to take a snatch, it would infinitely increase the interest and amusement of the lookers-on. Of this, however, there seemed little chance ; 198 HELEN but the evil eye of envy was set upon her, and the demon of jealousy was longing to work her woe. Lady Castlefort saw with scornful astonishment that Mr. Beauclerc's eyes, sometimes when she was speaking, or when she was singing, would stray to that part of the room where Miss Stanley might be ; and when she was speaking to him, he was wonderfully absent. Her ladyship rallied him, while Lady Katrine, looking on, cleared her throat in her horrid way, and longed for an opportunity to discomfit Helen, which supreme pleasure her ladyship promised herself upon the first convenient occasion, — convenient meaning when Lady Davenant was out of the room ; for Lady Katrine, though urged by prompting jealousy, dared not attack her when under cover of that protection. From long habit, even her sarcastic nature stood in awe of a certain power of moral indignation, which had at times flashed upon her, and of which she had a sort of superstitious dread, as of an in- comprehensible, incalculable power. But temper will get the better of all prudence. Piqued by some little preference which Lady Cecilia had shown to Helen's taste in the choice of the colour of a dress, an occasion offered of signalising her revenge, which could not be resisted. It was a question to be publicly decided, whether blue, green, or white should be adopted for the ladies' uniform at an approach- ing fite. She was deputed to collect the votes. All the company were assembled ; Lady Davenant, out of the circle, as it was a matter that concerned her not, was talking to the gentlemen apart. Lady Katrine went round canvassing. ' Blue, green, or white ? say blue, pray.' But when she came to Helen, she made a full stop, asked no question — preferred no prayer, but after fixing attention by her pause, said, ' I need not ask Miss Stanley's vote or opinion, as I know my cousin's, and with Miss Stanley it is always ' I say ditto to Lady Cecilia ' ; there- fore, to save trouble, I always count two for Ceciha — one for herself and one for her double.' ' Right, Lady Katrine Hawksby,' cried a voice from afar, which made her start ; ' you are quite right to consider Helen Stanley as my daughter's double, for my daughter loves and esteems her as her second self — her better self. In this sense Helen is Lady Cecilia's double, but if you mean ' 199 HELEN ' Bless me ! I don't know what I meant, I declare. I could not have conceived that Lady Davenant • Miss Stanley, I beg a thousand million of pardons.' Helen, with anxious good-nature, pardoned before she was asked, and hastened to pass on to the business of the day, but Lady Davenant would not so let it pass ; her eye still fixed, she pursued the quailing enemy — ' One word more. In jus- tice to my daughter, I must say her love has not been won by flattery, as none knows better than the Lady Katrine Hawksby.' The unkindest cut of all, and on the tenderest part. Lady Katrine could not stand it. Conscious and trembling, she broke through the circle, fled into the conservatory, and, closing the doors behind her, would not be followed by Helen, Cecilia, or anybody. Lady Castlefort sighed, and first breaking the silence that ensued, said, "Tis such a pity that Katrine will always so let her wit run away with her — it brings her so continually into For my part, in all humility 1 must confess, I can't help thinking that, what with its being unfeminine, and alto- gether so incompatible with what in general is thought ami- able — I cannot but consider wit in a woman as a real misfor- tune. What say the gentlemen ? they must decide, gentlemen being always the best judges.' With an appealing tone of interrogation she gracefully looked up to the gentlemen ; and after a glance towards Granville Beauclerc, unluckily unnoticed or unanswered, her eyes expected reply from Horace Churchill. He, well feeling the predicament in which he stood, between a fool and a fem7ne d' esprit, answered, with his ambiguous smile, ' that no doubt it was a great misfortune to have ^^ plus d'esprit qu'on ne suit inener." ' ' This is a misfortune,' said Lady Davenant, ' that may be deplored for a great genius once in an age, but is really rather of uncommon occurrence. People complain of wit where, nine times in ten, poor wit is quite innocent ; but such is the con- sequence of having kept bad company. Wit and ill-nature having been too often found together, when we see one we expect the other ; and such an inseparable false association has been formed, that half the world take it for granted that there is wit if they do but see ill-nature.' At this moment Mr. Mapletofift, the secretary, entered with 200 HELEN his face full of care, and his hands full of papers. Lady Katrine needed not to feign or feel any further apprehensions of Lady Davenant ; for, an hour afterwards, it was announced that Lord and Lady Davenant were obhged to set off for town immediately. In the midst of her hurried preparations Lady Davenant found a moment to comfort Helen with the assur- ance that, whatever happened, she would see her again. It might end in Lord Davenant's embassy being given up. At all events she would see her again — she hoped in a few weeks, perhaps in a few days. ' So no leave-takings, my dear child, and no tears — it is best as it is. On my return let me find ' ' Lord Davenant's waiting, my lady,' and she hurried away. CHAPTER XX Absent or present, the guardian influence of a superior friend is one of the greatest blessings on earth, and after Lady Davenant's departure Helen was so full of all she had said to her, and of all that she would approve or disapprove, that every action, almost every thought, was under the influence of her friend's mind. Continually she questioned her motives as well as examined her actions, and she could not but condemn some of her conduct, or if not her conduct, her manner, towards Horace Churchill ; she had been flattered by his admiration, and had permitted his attentions more than she ought, when her own mind was perfectly made up as to his character. Ever since the affair of the poetess, she had been convinced that she could never make the happiness or redeem the character of one so mean. According to the ladies' code, a woman is never to under- stand that a gentleman's attentions mean anything more than common civility ; she is supposed never to see his mind, however he may make it visible, till he declares it in words. But, as Helen could not help understanding his manner, she thought it was but fair to make him understand her by her manner. She was certain that if he were once completely convinced, not only that he had not made any impression, but 20I HELEN that he never could make any impression, on her heart, his pursuit would cease. His vanity, mortified, might revenge itself upon her, perhaps ; but this was a danger which she thought she ought to brave ; and now she resolved to be quite sincere, as she said to herself, at whatever hazard (probably meaning at the hazard of displeasing Cecilia) she would make her own sentiments clear, and put an end to Mr. Churchill's ambiguous conduct : and this should be done on the very first opportunity. An opportunity soon occurred — Horace had a beautiful little topaz ring with which Lady Katrine Hawksby fell into raptures ; such a charming device ! — Cupid and Momus making the world their plaything. It was evident that Lady Katrine expected that the seal should be presented to her. Besides being extravagantly fond of baubles, she desired to have this homage from Horace. To her surprise and mortification, however, he was only quite flattered by her approving of his taste : — it was his favourite seal, and so ' he kept the topaz, and the rogue was bit.' Lady Katrine was the more mortified by this failure, because it was witnessed by many of the company, among whom, when she looked round, she detected smiles of provoking intelligence. Soon afterwards the dressing-bell rang and she quitted the room ; one after another every one dropped off, except Helen, who was finishing a letter, and Horace, who stood on the hearth playing with his seal. When she came to sealing-time, he approached and besought her to honour him by the acceptance of this little seal. ' If he could obliterate Momus — if he could leave only Cupid, it would be more appropriate. But it was a device invented for him by a French friend, and he hoped she would pardon his folly, and think only of his love ! ' This was said so that it might pass either for mere jest or for earnest ; his look expressed very sentimental love, and Helen seized the moment to explain herself decidedly. It was a surprise — a great surprise — to Mr. Churchill, a severe disappointment, not only to his vanity but to his heart, for he had one. It was some comfort, however, that he had not quite committed himself, and he recovered — even in the moment of disappointment he recovered himself time enough dexterously to turn the tables upon Helen. He thanked her for her candour — for her great care of his 202 It was a surprise— a- erea-t surprise— U Mr. CImrchill. HELEN happiness, in anticipating a danger which might have been so fatal to him ; but he really was not aware that he had said anything which required so serious an answer. Afterwards he amused himself with Lady Katrine at Miss Stanley's expense, representing himself as in the most pitiable case of Rejected Addresses — rejected before he had offered. He had only been guilty of Folly, and he was brought in guilty of Love. Poor Helen had to endure not only this persiflage, which was soon made to reach her ear, but also the reproaches of Lady Cecilia, who said, ' I should have warned you, Helen, not to irritate that man's relentless vanity ; now you see the consequences.' ' But, after all, what harm can he do me ? ' thought Helen. ' It is very disagreeable to be laughed at, but still my con- science is satisfied, and that is a happiness that will last ; all the rest will soon be over. I am sure I did the thing awkwardly, but I am glad it is done.' Mr. Churchill soon afterwards received an invitation — a command to join a royal party now at some watering-place ; an illustrious person could not live another day without Horace le desire. He showed the note, and acted despair at being compelled to go, and then he departed. To the splendid party he went, and drowned all recollections of whatever love he had felt in the fresh intoxication of vanity — a diurnal stimulus which, however degrading, and he did feel it degrading, was now become necessaiy to his existence. His departure from Clarendon Park was openly regretted by Lady Cecilia, while Lady Katrine secretly mourned over the downfall of her projects, and Beauclerc attempted not to dis- guise his satisfaction. He was all life and love, and would then certainly have de- clared his passion, but for an extraordinary change which now appeared in Helen's manner towards him. It seemed unac- countable ; it could not be absolute caprice, she did not even treat him as a friend, and she evidently avoided explanation. He thought, and thought, and came as near the truth without touching it as possible. He concluded that she had understood his joy at Churchill's departure ; that she now clearly per- ceived his attachment ; and was determined against him. Not having the slightest idea that she considered him as a 204 HELEN married man, he could not even guess the nature of her feelings. And all the time Helen did not well understand herself; she began to be extremely alarmed at her own feelings — to dread that there was something not quite right. This dread, which had come and gone by fits, — this doubt as to her own senti- ments, — was first excited by the death of her dove — Beau- clerc's gift. The poor dove was found one morning drowned in the marble vase in which it went to drink. Helen was very sorry — that was surely natural ; but she was wonderfully concerned. Lady Katrine scoflSngly said, and before every- body, before Beauclerc, worse than all, her ladyship repre- sented to the best of her ability the attitude in which she had found Helen mourning over her misfortune, the dove in her hand pressed close to her bosom — ' And in tears — absolutely.' She would swear to the tears. Helen blushed, tried to laugh, and acknowledged it was very foolish. Well, that passed off as only foolish, and she did not at first feel that it was a thing much to be ashamed of in any other way. But she was sorry that Beauclerc was by when Lady Katrine mimicked her ; most sorry that he should think her foolish. But then did he ? His looks expressed tenderness. He was very tender-hearted. Really manly men always are so ; and so she observed to Lady Cecilia. Lady Katrine heard the observation, and smiled — her odious smile — implying more than words could say. Helen was not quite clear, however, what it meant to say. Some days afterwards Lady Katrine took up a book, in which Helen's name was written in Beauclerc's hand. ' Gage iVamitii ? ' said her ladyship ; and she walked up and down the room, humming the air of an old French song ; interrupt- ing herself now and then to ask her sister if she could recol- lect the words. ' The refrain, if I remember right, is some- thing like this — Sous le nom d'amitie — sous le nom d'amitie, La moitie du monde trompe I'autre moitie, Sous le nom, sous le nom, sous le nom d'amitie. And it ends with Sous le nom d'amitie, Damon, je vous adore, Sous le nom, sous le nom d'amitie. 205 HELEN Miss Stanley, do you know that song ? ' concluded her ma- licious ladyship. No — Miss Stanley had never heard it before ; but the marked emphasis with which Lady Katrine sang and looked made Helen clear that she meant to apply the words taunt- ingly to her and Beauclerc, — but which of them her ladyship suspected was cheating, or cheated, ' sous le nam d'amitie,' she did not know. All was confusion in her mind. After a moment's cooler reflection, however, she was certain it could not be Beauclerc who was to blame — it must be herself, and she now very much wished that everybody, and Lady Katrine in particular, should know that Mr. Beauclerc was engaged — almost married ; if this were but known, it would put an end to all such imputations. The first time she could speak to Cecilia on the subject, she begged to know how soon Mr. Beauclerc's engagement would be declared. Lady Cecilia slightly answered she could not tell — and when Helen pressed the question she asked, — ' Why are you so anxious, Helen ? ' Helen honestly told her, and Lady Cecilia only laughed at her for minding what Lady Katrine said, — ' When you know yourself, Helen, how it is, what can it signify what mistakes others may make ? ' But Helen grew more and more uneasy, for she was not clear that she did know how it was, with herself at least. Her conscience faltered, and she was not sure whether she was alarmed with or without reason. She began to compare feelings that she had read of, and feelings that she had seen in others, and feelings that were new to herself, and in this maze and mist nothing was distinct — much was magnified — all alarming. One day Beauclerc was within view of the windows on horse- back, on a very spirited horse, which he managed admirably ; but a shot fired suddenly in an adjoining preserve so startled the horse that it oh 1 what it did Helen did not see, she was so terrified : and why was she so much terrified ? She excused herself by saying it was natural to be frightened for any human creature. But, on the other hand, Tom Isdall was a human creature, and she had seen him last week actually thrown from his horse, and had not felt much concern. But then he was not a friend ; and he fell into a soft ditch : and 206 HELEN there was something ridiculous in it which prevented people from caring about it. With such nice casuistry she went on pretty well ; and be- sides, she was so innocent, so ignorant, that it was easy for her to be deceived. She went on, telling herself that she loved Beauclerc as a brother — as she loved the General. But when she came to comparisons, she could not but perceive a differ- ence. Her heart never bounded on the General's appearance, let him appear ever so suddenly, as it did one day when Beau- clerc returned unexpectedly from Old Forest. Her whole ex- istence seemed so altered by his approach, his presence, or his absence. Why was this ? Was there anything wrong in it ? She had nobody whose judgment she could consult — nobody to whom she could venture to describe her feelings, or lay open her doubts and scruples. Lady Cecilia would only laugh ; and she could not quite trust either her judgment or her sincerity, though she knew her affection. Besides, after what Cecilia had said of her being safe ; after all she had told her of Beauderc's engagement, how astonished and shocked Cecilia would be ! Then Helen resolved that she would keep a strict watch over herself, and repress all emotion, and be severe with her own mind to the utmost : and it was upon this resolution that she had changed her manner, without knowing how much, to- wards Beauclerc ; she was certain he meant nothing but friend- ship. It was her fault if she felt too much pleasure in his company ; the same things were, as she wisely argued, right or wrong according to the intention with which they were said, done, looked, or felt. Rigidly she inflicted on herself the penance of avoiding his delightful society, and to make sure that she did not try to attract, she repelled him with all her power — thought she never could make herself cold, and stiff, and disagreeable enough to satisfy her conscience. Then she grew frightened at Beauderc's looks of astonish- ment — feared he would ask explanation — avoided him more and more. Then, on the other hand, she feared he might guess and interpret wrong, or rather right, this change ; and back she changed, tried in vain to keep the just medium — she had lost the power of measuring — altogether she was very un- happy, and so was Beauclerc ; he found her incomprehensible, and thought her capricious. His own mind was fluttered with love, so that he could not see or judge distinctly, else he might 207 HELEN have seen the truth ; and sometimes, though free from conceit, he did hope it might be all love. But why then so determined to discourage him ? he had advanced sufficiently to mark his intentions, she could not doubt his sincerity. He would see farther before he ventured farther. He thought a man was a fool who proposed before he had tolerable reason to believe he should not be refused. Lord Beltravers and his sisters were now expected at Old Forest immediately, and Beauclerc went thither early every morning, to press forward the preparations for the arrival of the family, and he seldom returned till dinner-time ; and every evening Lady Castlefort contrived to take possession of him. It appeared to be indeed as much against his will as it could be between a well-bred man and a high-bred belle ; but to do her bidding seemed, if not a moral, at least a polite necessity. She had been spoiled, she owned, by foreign attentions, not French, for that is all gone now at Paris, but Italian manners, which she so much preferred. She did not know how she could live out of Italy, and she must convince Lord Castlefort that the climate was necessary for her health. Meanwhile she adopted, she acted, what she conceived to be foreign manners, and with an exaggeration common with those who have very little sense and a vast desire to be fashionable with a certain set. Those who knew her best (all but her sister Katrine, who shook her head) were convinced that there was really no harm in Lady Castlefort, 'only vanity and folly.' How frequently folly leads farther than fools ever, or wise people often, foresee, we need not here stop to record. On the present occasion, all at Clarendon Park, even those most inclined to scandal, — persons who, by the bye, may be always known by their invari- able preface of ' I hate all scandal,' — agreed that no one so far could behave better than Granville Beauclerc — ' so far,' — ' as yet.' But all the elderly who had any experience of this world, all the young who had any intuitive prescience in these matters, could not but fear that things could not long go on as they were now going. It was sadly to be feared that so young a man, and so very handsome a man, and such an admirer of beauty, and grace, and music, and of such an enthusiastic temper, must be in danger of being drawn on farther than he was aware, and before he knew what he was about. The General heard and saw all that went on without seem- 208 HELEN ing to take heed, only once he asked Cecilia how long she thought her cousins would stay. She did not know, but she said ' she saw he wished them to be what they were not — cousins once removed — and quite agreed with him.' He smiled, for a man is always well pleased to find his wife agree with him in disliking her cousins. One night — one fine moonlight night — Lady Castlefort, standing at the conservatory door with Beauclerc, after talking an inconceivable quantity of nonsense about her passion for the moon, and her notions about the stars, and congenial souls bom under the same planet, proposed to him a moonlight walk. The General was at the time playing at chess with Helen, and had the best of the game, but at that moment he made a false move, was checkmated, rose hastily, threw the men to- gether on the board, and forgot to regret his shameful defeat, or to compliment Helen upon her victory. Lady Castlefort, having just discovered that the fatality nonsense about the stars would not quite do for Beauclerc, had been the next instant seized with a sudden passion for astronomy ; she must see those charming rings of Saturn, which she had heard so much of, which the General was showing Miss Stanley the other night ; she must beg him to lend his telescope ; she came up with her sweetest smile to trouble the General for his glass. Lord Castlefort, following, objected strenuously to her going out at night ; she had been complaining of a bad cold when he wanted her to walk in the daytime, she would only make it worse by going out in the night air. If she wanted to see Saturn and his rings, the General, he was sure, would fix a telescope at the window for her. But that would not do, she must have a moonlight walk ; she threw open the conservatory door, beckoned to Mr. Beau- clerc, and how it ended Helen did not stay to see. She thought that she ought not even to think on the subject, and she went away as fast as she could. It was late, and she went to bed wishing to be up early, to go on with a drawing she was to finish for Mrs. Collingwood^a view by the river-side, that view which had struck her fancy as so beautiful the day she went first to Old Forest. Early the next morning — and a delightful morning it was — she was up and out, and reached the spot from which her sketch was taken. She was surprised p 209 HELEN to find her little camp-stool, which she had looked for in vain in the hall, in its usual place, set here ready for her, and on it a pencil nicely cut. Beauclerc must have done this. But he was not in general an early riser. However, she concluded that he had gone over thus early to Old Forest, to see his friend Lord Beltravers, who was to have arrived the day before, with his sisters. She saw a boat rowing down the river, and she had no doubt he was gone. But just as she had settled to her drawing, she heard the joyful bark of Beauclerc's dog Nelson, who came bounding towards her, and the next moment his master appeared, coming down the path from the wood. With quick steps he came till he was nearly close to her, then slack- ened his pace. ' Good morning ! ' said Helen ; she tried to speak with composure, but her heart beat — she could not help feeling surprise at seeing him — but it was only surprise. ' I thought you were gone to Old Forest ? ' said she. ' Not yet,' said he. His voice sounded different from usual, and she saw in him some suppressed agitation. She endeavoured to keep her own manner unembarrassed — she thanked him for the nicely-cut pencil, and the exactly well-placed seat. He advanced a step or two nearer, stooped, and looked close at her drawing, but he did not seem to see or know what he was looking at. At this moment Nelson, who had been too long unnoticed, put up one paw on Miss Stanley's arm, unseen by his master, and encouraged by such gentle reproof as Helen gave, his audacious paw was on the top of her drawing-book the next moment, and the next was upon the drawing — and the paw was wet with dew. ' Nelson ! ' exclaimed his master in an angry tone. ' Oh do not scold him,' cried Helen, ' do not punish him ; the drawing is not spoiled — only wet, and it will be as well as ever when it is dry.' Beauclerc ejaculated something about the temper of an angel while she patted Nelson's penitent head. ' As the drawing must be left to dry,' said Beauclerc, ' perhaps Miss Stanley would do me the favour to walk as far as the landing-place, where the boat is to meet me — to take me — if — if I MUST go to Old Forest ! ' and he sighed. 2IO HELEN She took his offered arm and walked on — surprised — confused ; — wondering what he meant by that sigh and that look — and that strong emphasis on must. ' If I must go to Old Forest.' Was not it a pleasure ? — was it not his own choice ? — what could he mean ? What could be the matter ? A vague agitating idea rose in her mind, but she put it from her, and they walked on for some minutes, both silent. They entered the wood, and feeling the silence awkward, and afraid that he should perceive her embarrassment, and that he should suspect her suspicion, she exerted herself to speak — to say something, no matter what. ' It is a charming morning ! ' After a pause of absence of mind, he answered, ' Charming ! — very ! ' Then stopping short, he fixed his eyes upon Helen with an expression that she was afraid to understand. It could hardly bear any interpretation but one — and yet that was impossible — ought to be impossible — from a man in Beauclerc's circum- stances — engaged — almost a married man, as she had been told to consider him. She did not know at this moment what to think — still she thought she must mistake him, and she should be excessively ashamed of such a mistake, and now more strongly felt the dread that he should see and misinter- pret or interpret too rightly her emotion ; she walked on quicker, and her breath grew short, and her colour heightened. He saw her agitation — a delightful hope arose in his mind. It was plain she was not indifferent — he looked at her, but dared not look long enough — feared that he was mistaken. But the embarrassment seemed to change its character even as he looked, and now it was more like displeasure — decidedly, she appeared displeased. And so she was ; for she thought now that he must either be trifling with her, or, if serious, must be acting most dishonourably ; — her good opinion of him must be destroyed for ever, if, as now it seemed, he wished to make an impression upon her heart — yet still she tried not to think, not to see it. She was sorry, she was very wrong to let such an idea into her mind— and still her agitation increased. Quick as she turned from him these thoughts passed in her mind, alternately angry and ashamed, and at last, forcing her- self to be composed, telling herself she ought to see farther and at least to be certain before she condemned him — con- 211 HELEN demned so kind, so honourable a friend, while the fault might be all her own ; she now, in a softened tone, as if begging pardon for the pain she had given, and the injustice she had done him, said some words, insignificant in themselves, but from the voice of kindness charming to Beauclerc's ear and soul. ' Are not we walking very fast ? ' said she, breathless. He slackened his pace instantly, and with a delighted look, while she, in a hurried voice, added, ' But do not let me delay you. There is the boat. You must be in haste — impatient ! ' ' In haste ! impatient ! to leave you, Helen ! ' She blushed deeper than he had ever seen her blush before. Beauclerc in general knew Which blush was anger's, which was love's ! But now he was so much moved he could not decide at the first glance : at the second, there was no doubt ; it was anger — not love. Her arm was withdrawn from his. He was afraid he had gone too far. He had called her Helen ! He begged pardon, half humbly, half proudly. ' I beg pardon ; Miss Stanley, I should have said. I see I have offended. I fear I have been presumptuous, but Lady Davenant taught me to trust to Miss Stanley's sincerity, and I was encouraged by her expressions of confidence and friendship.' ' Friendship ! Oh yes ! Mr. Beauclerc,' said Helen, in a hurried voice, eagerly seizing on and repeating the word friendship ; ' yes, I have always considered you as a friend. I am sure I shall always find you a sincere, good friend.' ' Friend ! ' he repeated in a disappointed tone — all his hopes sank. She took his arm again, and he was displeased even with that. She was not the being of real sensibility he had fancied — she was not capable of real love. So vacillated his heart and his imagination, and so quarrelled he alternately every instant with her and with himself. He could not under- stand her, or decide what he should next do or say himself ; and there was the boat nearing the land, and they were going on, on, towards it in silence. He sighed. It was a sigh that could not but be heard and noticed ; it was not meant to be noticed, and yet it was. What could she think of it ? She could not believe that Beauclerc meant to HELEN act treacherously. This time she was determined not to take anything for granted, not to be so foolish as she had been with , Mr. Churchill. ' Is not that your boat that I see, rowing close ? ' ' Yes, I believe — certainly. Yes,' said he. But now the vacillation of Beauclerc's mind suddenly ceased. Desperate, he stopped her, as she would have turned down that path to the landing-place where the boat was mooring. He stood full across the path. ' Miss Stanley, one word — by one word, one look, decide. You must decide for me whether I stay — or go — for ever ! ' ' I t — Mr. Beauclerc ! ' The look of astonishment- — more than astonishment, almost of indignation — silenced him completely, and he stood dismayed. She pressed onwards, and he no longer stopped her path. For an instant he submitted in despair. ' Then I must not think of it. I must go — must I, Miss Stanley ? Will not you listen to me, Helen ? Advise me ; let me open my heart to you as a friend.' She stopped under the shady tree beneath which they were passing, and, leaning against it, she repeated, 'As a friend — but, no, no, Mr. Beauclerc — no ; I am not the friend you should consult — consult the General, your guardian.' ' I have consulted him, and he approves.' ' You have ! That is weU, that is well at all events,' cried she ; ' if he approves, then all is right.' There was a ray of satisfaction on her countenance. He looked as if considering what she exactly meant. He hoped again, and was again resolved to hazard the decisive words. ' If you knew all ! ' and he pressed her arm closer to him — ' if I might tell you all ? ' Helen withdrew her arm decidedly. ' I know all,' said she ; ' all I ought to know, Mr. Beauclerc' ' You know all ! ' cried he, astonished at her manner. ' You know the circumstances in which I am placed ? ' He alluded to the position in which he stood with Lady Castlefort ; she thought he meant with respect to Lady Blanche, and she answered — ' Yes : I know all ! ' and her eye turned towards the boat. ' I understand you,' said he ; ' you think I ought to go ? ' 213 . '^^ ^,»^'( rotisted he knew nothing about il. HELEN Katrine ; — mentioned that one morning, some time ago, he had dropped in unexpectedly early at Lady Castlefort's, and had been surprised to find the two sisters, contrary to their wont, together — their heads and Horace Churchill's over some manuscript, which was shuffled away as he entered. This was true, all but the shuffling away ; and here it is necessary to form a clear notion, clearer than Lord Beltravers will give, of the different shares of wrong ; of wrong knowingly and un- knowingly perpetrated by the several scandal -mongers con- cerned in this affair. Lord Beltravers could be in no doubt as to his own share, for he it was who had furnished the editor of Colonel D'Aubigny's Memoirs with the famous letters. When Carlos, Lady Davenant's runaway page, escaped from Clarendon Park, having changed his name, he got into the service of Sir Thomas D'Aubigny, who was just at this time arranging his brother's papers. Now it had happened that Carlos had been concealed behind the screen in Lady Davenant's room the day of her first conversation with Helen about Colonel D'Aubigny, and he had understood enough of it to perceive that there was some mystery about the Colonel with either Helen or Lady Cecilia ; and chancing one day, soon after he entered Sir Thomas's service, to find his escritoire open, he amused him- self with looking over his papers, among which he discovered the packet of Lady Cecilia's letters. Carlos was not perfectly sure of the handwriting ; he thought it was Lady Cecilia's ; but when he found the miniature of Miss Stanley along with them, he concluded that the letters must be hers. And having special reasons for feeling vengeance against Helen, and cer- tain at all events of doing mischief, he sent them to General Clarendon : not, however, forgetting his old trade, he copied them first. This was just at the time when Lord Beltravers returned from abroad after his sister's divorce. He by some accident found out who Carlos was, and whence he came, and, full of his own views for his sister, he cross-examined him as to everything he knew about Miss Stanley; and partly by bribes, partly by threats of betraying him to Lady Davenant, he contrived to get from him the copied letters. Carlos soon after returned with his master to Portugal, and was never more heard of. Lord Beltravers took these purloined copies of the letters, thus surreptitiously obtained, to the editor into 435 HELEN whose hands Sir Thomas D'Aubigny (who knew nothing of books or book-making) had put his brother's memoirs. This editor, as has been mentioned, had previously consulted Mr. Churchill, and in consequence of his pepper-and-salt hint. Lord Beltravers himself made those interpolations which he hoped would ruin his sister's rival in the eyes of her lover. Mr. Churchill, however, except this hint, and except his vanity in furnishing a good title, and his coxcombry of literary patronage, and his general hope that Helen's name being impli- cated in such a publication would avenge her rejection of him- self, had had nothing to do with the business. This Lord Beltravers well knew, and yet when he found that the slander made no impression upon Beauclerc, and that he was only intent upon discovering the slanderer, he, with dexterous treachery, contrived to turn the tables upon Churchill, and to direct all Beauclerc's suspicion towards him. He took his friend home with him, and showed him all the newspaper paragraphs — paragraphs which he himself had written ! Yes, this man of romantic friendship, this blase, this hero oppressed with his own sensibility, could condescend to write anonymous scandal, to league with newsmongers, and to bribe waiting- women to supply him with information, for Mademoiselle Felicie had, through Lady Katrine's maid, told all, and more than all, she knew, of what passed at General Clarendon's ; and on this foundation did he construct those paragraphs, which he hoped would blast the character of the woman to whom his dearest friend was engaged. And now he contrived to say all that could convince Beauclerc that Mr. Churchill was the author of these very paragraphs. And, hot and rash, Beauclerc rushed on to that conclusion. He wrote a challenge to Churchill, and as soon as it was possible in the morning he sent it by Lord Beltravers. Mr. Churchill named Sir John Luttrell as his friend : Lord Beltravers would enter into no terms of accommodation ; the challenge was accepted, Chalk Farm appointed as the place of meeting, and the time fixed for eight o'clock next morning. And thus, partly by his own warmth of temper, and partly by the falsehood of others, was Beauclerc urged on to the action he detested, to be the thing he hated. Duelling and duellists had, from the time he could think, been his abhorrence, and now he was to end his life, or to take the life of a fellow-creature perhaps, in a duel, 436 HELEN There was a dread interval. And it was during the re- mainder of this day and night that Beauclerc felt most strongly, compared with all other earthly ties, his attachment, his passionate love, for Helen. At every pause, at every close of other thoughts forced upon him, his mind recurred to Helen — what Helen would feel — what Helen would think — what she would suffer — and in the most and in the least important things his care was for her. He recalled the last look that he had seen at the carriage-door when they parted, recollected that it expressed anxiety, was conscious that he had turned away abruptly — that in the preoccupied state of his mind he had not spoken one word of kindness — and that this might be the last impression of him left on her mind. He knew that her anxiety would increase, when all that day must pass with- out his return, and it was then he thought of sending her those flowers which would, he knew, reassure her better than any words he could venture to write. Meanwhile his false friend coldly calculated what were the chances in his sister's favour ; and when Churchill fell, and even in the hurry of their immediate departure. Lord Beltravers wrote to Madame de St. Cymon, over whom the present state of her affairs gave him command, to order her to set out immediately, and to take Blanche vrith her to Paris, without asking the consent of that fool and prude, her aunt Lady Grace. It was well for poor Helen, even in the dreadful uncertainty in which she left London, that she did not know all these cir- cumstances. It may be doubted, indeed, whether we should be altogether happier in this life if that worst of evils, as it is often called, suspense, were absolutely annihilated, and if human creatures could clearly see their fate, or even know what is most likely to happen. CHAPTER XLIII According to the General's advice, Mrs. Pennant did not delay her journey, and Helen left London the next day with her and Miss Clarendon. The last bulletin of Mr. Churchill had been 437 HELEN that he was still in great danger, and a few scarce legible lines Helen had received from Cecilia, saying that the General would not allow her to agitate herself by going to take leave of her, that she was glad that Helen was to be out of town till all blew over, and that she was so much distracted by this horrible event, she scarcely knew what she wrote. As they drove out of town, Miss Clarendon, in hopes of turning Helen's thoughts, went on talking. ' Unless,' said she, 'we could, like Madame de Genlis, "promote the post- boys into agents of mystery and romance," we have but little chance, I am afraid, of any adventures on our journey to Llansillen, my dear Miss Stanley.' She inveighed against the stupid safety, convenience, luxury, and expedition of travelling nowadays all over England, even in Wales, ' so that one might sleep the whole way from Hyde Park Corner to Llansillen gate,' said she, 'and have no un- conscionably long nap either. No difficulties on the road, no- thing to complain of at inns, no enjoying one's dear delight in being angry, no opportunity even of showing one's charming resignation. Dreadfully bad this for the nervous and bilious, for all the real use and benefit of travelling is done away ; all too easy for my taste ; one might as well be a doll, or a dolt, or a parcel in the coach.' Helen would have been glad to have been considered merely as a parcel in the coach. During the whole journey, she took no notice of anything till they came within a few miles of Llansillen ; then, endeavouring to sympathise with her com- panions, she looked out of the carriage window at the prospect which they admired. But, however charming, Llansillen had not for Helen the chief charm of early, fond, old associations with a happy home. To her it was to be, she doubted not, as happy as kindness could make it, but still it was new ; and in that thought, that feeling, there was something inexpress- ibly melancholy ; and the contrast, at this moment, between her sensations and those of her companions, made the pain the more poignant ; they perceived this, and were silent. Helen was grateful for this consideration for her, but she could not bear to be a constraint upon them, therefore she now exerted herself, sat forward — Admired and talked when she was scarcely able to speak. By the time they came to Llansillen gate, however, she could say no more ; she was obliged to ac- 438 HELEN knowledge that she was not well ; and when the carriage at last stopped at the door, there was such a throbbing in her temples, and she was altogether so ill, that it was with the greatest difBculty she could, leaning on Miss Clarendon's arm, mount the high steps to the hall-door. She could scarcely stand when she reached the top, but, making an effort, she went on, crossed the slippery floor of that great hall, and came to the foot of the black oak staircase, of which the steps were so very low that she thought she could easily go up, but found it impossible, and she was carried directly up to Miss Claren- don's own room, no other having been yet prepared. The rosy Welsh maids looked with pity on the pale stranger. They hurried to and fro, talking Welsh to one another very fast ; and Helen felt as if she were in a foreign land, and in a dream. The end of the matter was, that she had a low fever which lasted long. It was more dispiriting than dangerous — more tedious than alarming. Her illness continued for many weeks, during which time she was attended most carefully by her two new friends — |by Miss Clarendon with the utmost zeal and activity — by Mrs. Pennant with the greatest solicitude and tenderness. Her history for these weeks — indeed for some months afterwards — can be only the diary of an invalid and of a con- valescent. Miss Clarendon meanwhile received from her brother, punctually, once a week, bulletins of Churchill's health ; the surgical details, the fears of the formation of in- ternal abscess, reports of continual exfoliations of bone, were judiciously suppressed, and the laconic General reported only ' Much the same — not progressing — cannot be pronounced out of danger.' These bulletins were duly repeated to Helen, whenever she was able to hear them ; and at last she was con- sidered well enough to read various letters, which had arrived for her during her illness ; several were from Lady Cecilia, but little in them. The first was full only of expressions of regret, and self-reproach ; in the last, she said, she hoped soon to have u. right to claim Helen back again. This under- lined passage Helen knew alluded to the promise she had once made, that at the birth of her child all should be told ; but words of promise from Cecilia had lost all value — all power to excite even hope, as she said to herself as she read the words, and sighed. 439 HELEN One of her letters mentioned what she would have seen in the first newspaper she had opened, that Lady Blanche For- rester was gone with her sister, the Comtesse de St. Cymon, to Paris, to join her brother Lord Beltravers. But Lady Cecilia observed that Helen need not be alarmed by this paragraph, which she was sure was inserted on purpose to plague her. Lady Cecilia seemed to take it for granted that her rejection of Beauclerc was only a ruse d'amour, and went on with her usual hopes, now vague and more vague every letter — that things would end well some time, somehow or other. Helen only sighed on reading these letters, and, quick as she glanced her eye over them, threw them from her on the bed ; and Miss Clarendon said, ' Ah ! you know her now, I see !' Helen made no reply : she was careful not to make any comment which could betray how much, or what sort of reason she had to complain of Lady Cecilia ; but Miss Clarendon, confident that she had guessed pretty nearly the truth, was satisfied with her own penetration, and then, after seeming to doubt for a few moments, she put another letter into Helen's hand, and with one of those looks of tender interest which sometimes softened her countenance, she left the room. The letter was from Beauclerc ; it appeared to have been written immediately after he had received Helen's letter, and was as follows : — ' Not write to you, my dearest Helen ! Renounce my claim to your hand ! submit to be rejected by you, my affianced bride ! No, never — never ! Doubt ! suspicion ! — suspicion of you ! — you, angel as you are — you, who have devoted, sacrificed, yourself to others. No, Helen, my admiration, my love, my trust in you, are greater than they ever were. And do / dare to say these words to you ? /, who am perhaps a mur- derer ! I ought to imitate your generosity, I ought not to offer you a hand stained with blood : — 1 ought at least to leave you free till 1 know when I may return from banishment. I have written this at the first instant I have been able to command during my hurried journey, and as you know something of what led to this unhappy business, you shall in my next letter hear the whole ; till then, adieu ! ' Granville Beauclerc' 440 HELEN The next day, when she thought Helen sufificiently recovered from the agitation of reading Beauclerc's letter, aunt Pennant produced one letter more, which she had kept for the last, be- cause she hoped it would give pleasure to her patient. Helen sat up in her bed eagerly, and stretched out her hand. The letter was directed by General Clarendon, but that was only the outer cover, they knew, for he had mentioned in his last despatch to his sister that the letter enclosed for Miss Stanley was from Lady Davenant. Helen tore off the cover, but the instant she saw the inner direction, she sank back, turned, and hid her face on the pillow. It was directed — 'To Mrs. Granville Beauclerc' Lady Davenant had unfortunately taken it for granted that nothing could have prevented the marriage. Aunt Pennant blamed herself for not having foreseen and prevented this accident, which she saw distressed poor Helen so much. But Miss Clarendon wondered that she was so shocked, and supposed she would get over it in a few minutes, or else she must be very weak. There was nothing that tended to raise her spirits much in the letter itself, to make amends for the shock the direction had given. It contained but a few lines in Lady Davenant's own handwriting, and a postscript from Lord Davenant. She wrote only to announce their safe arrival at Petersburg, as she was obliged to send off her letter before she had received any despatches from England ; and she concluded with, ' I am sure the first will bring me the joyful news of Beauclerc's happiness and yours, my dear child.' Lord Davenant's postscript added that in truth Lady Davenant much needed such a cordial, for that her health had suffered even more than he had feared it would. He repented that he had allowed her to accompany him to such a rigorous climate. All that could be said to allay the apprehensions this post- script might excite, was of course said in the best way by aunt Pennant. But it was plain that Helen did not recover during the whole of this day from the shock she had felt ' from that foolish direction,' as Miss Clarendon said. She could not be prevailed upon to rise this day, though Miss Clarendon, after feeling her pulse, had declared that she was very well able to get up. ' It was very bad for her to remain in bed.' 441 HELEN This was true, no doubt. And Miss Clarendon remarked to her aunt that she was surprised to find Miss Stanley so weak. Her aunt replied that it was not surprising that she should be rather weak at present, after such a long illness. ' Weakness of body and mind need not go together,' said Miss Clarendon. ' Need not, perhaps,' said her aunt, ' but they are apt to do so.' ' It is to be hoped the weakness of mind will go with the weakness of body, and soon,' said Miss Clarendon. ' We must do what we can to strengthen and fatten her, poor thing ! ' said Mrs. Pennant. ' Fatten the body, rather easier than to strengthen the mind. Strength of mind cannot be thrown in, as you would throw in the bark, or the chicken broth.' ' Only have patience with her,' said Mrs. Pennant, ' and you will find that she will have strength of mind enough when she gets quite well. Only have patience.' During Helen's illness Miss Clarendon had been patient, but now that she was pronounced convalescent, she became eager to see her quite well. In time of need Miss Clarendon had been not only the most active and zealous, but a most gentle and — doubt it who may — soft-stepping, soft-voiced nurse ; but now, when Doctor Tudor had assured them that all fever was gone, and agreed with her that the patient would soon be well, if she would only think so, Miss Clarendon deemed it high time to use something more than her milder influence, to become, if not a rugged, at least a stern nurse, and she brought out some of her rigid lore. ' I intend that you should get up in seasonable time to-day, Helen,' said she, as she entered her room. ' Do you ? ' said Helen in a languid voice. ' I do,' said Miss Clarendon ; ' and I hope you do not intend to do as you did yesterday, to lie in bed all day.' Helen turned, sighed, and Mrs. Pennant said, ' Yesterday is over, my dear Esther — no use in talking of yesterday.' ' Only to secure our doing better to-day, ma'am,' replied Miss Clarendon, with prompt ability. Helen was all submission, and she got up, and that was well. Miss Clarendon went in quest of arrow-root judiciously ; and aunt Pennant stayed and nourished her patient meanwhile with 442 HELEN ' the fostering dew of praise ' ; and let her dress as slowly and move as languidly as she liked, though Miss Clarendon had admonished her ' not to dawdle.' As soon as she was dressed, Helen went to the window and threw up the sash for the first time to enjoy the fresh air, and to see the prospect, which she was told was beautiful ; and she saw that it was beautiful, and, though it was still winter, she felt that the air was balmy ; and the sun shone bright, and the grass began to be green, for spring approached. But how different to her from the spring-time of former years ! Nature the same, but all within herself how changed ! And all which used to please, and to seem to her most cheerful, now came over her spirits with a sense of sadness ; — she felt as if all the life of life was gone. Tears filled her eyes, large tears rolled slowly down as she stood fixed, seeming to gaze from that win- dow at she knew not what. Aunt Pennant unperceived stood beside her, and let the tears flow unnoticed. ' They will do her good ; they are a great relief sometimes.' Miss Clarendon returned, and the tears were dried, but the glaze remained, and Miss Clarendon saw it, and gave a re- proachful look at her aunt, as much as to say, ' Why did you let her cry ? ' And her aunt's look in reply was, ' I could not help it, my dear.' ' Eat your arrow-root,' was all that transpired to Helen. And she tried to eat, but could not ; and Miss Clarendon was not well pleased, for the arrow-root was good, and she had made it ; she felt Miss Stanley's pulse, and said that ' it was as good a pulse as could be, only low and a little fluttered.' 'Do not flutter it any more, then, Esther, my dear,' said Mrs. Pennant. 'What am I doing or saying, ma'am, that should flutter anybody that has common sense ? ' ' Some people don't like to have their pulse felt,' said aunt Pennant. ' Those people have not common sense,' replied the niece. ' I believe I have not common sense,' said Helen. 'Sense you have enough — resolution is what you want, Helen, I tell you.' 'I know,' said Helen, 'too true ' 'True, but not too true — nothing can be too true.' ' True,' said Helen, with languid submission. 443 HELEN Helen was not in a condition to chop logic, or ever much inclined to it ; now less than ever, and least of all with Miss Clarendon, so able as she was. There is something very pro- voking sometimes in perfect submission, because it is unanswer- able. But the languor, not the submission, afforded some cause for further remark and remonstrance. ' Helen, you are dreadfully languid to-day.' ' Sadly,' said Helen. ' If you could have eaten more arrow-root before it grew cold, you would have been better.' ' But if she could not, my dear Esther,' said aunt Pennant. ' Could not, ma'am ! As if people could not eat if they pleased.' ' But if people have no appetite, my dear, I am afraid eating will not do much good.' ' I am afraid, my dear aunt, you will not do Miss Stanley much good,' said Miss Clarendon, shaking her head; 'you will only spoil her.' ' I am quite spoiled, I believe,' said Helen ; ' you must unspoil me, Esther.' ' Not so very easy,' said Esther ; ' but I shall try, for I am a sincere friend.' ' I am sure of it,' said Helen. Then what more could be said ? Nothing at that time — Helen's look was so sincerely grateful, and ' gentle as a lamb,' as aunt Pennant observed ; and Esther was not a wolf quite — at heart not at all. Miss Clarendon presently remarked that Miss Stanley really did not seem glad to be better — glad to get well. Helen ac- knowledged that, instead of being glad, she was rather sorry. ' If it had pleased Heaven, I should have been glad to die.' ' Nonsense about dying, and worse than nonsense,' cried Miss Clarendon, ' when you see that it did not please Heaven that you should die ' ' I am content to live,' said Helen. ' Content ! to be sure you are,' said Miss Clarendon. ' Is this your thankfulness to Providence ? ' ' I am resigned — I am thankful — I will try to be more so — but I cannot be glad.' General Clarendon's bulletins continued with little variation for some time ; they were always to his sister — he never 444 HELEN mentioned Beauclerc, but confined himself to the few lines or words necessary to give his promised regular accounts of Mr. Churchill's state, the sum of which continued to be for a length of time: 'Much the same.' 'Not in immediate danger.' ' Cannot be pronounced out of danger.' Not very consolatory, Helen felt. ' But while there is life, there is hope,' as aunt Pennant observed. ' Yes, and fear,' said Helen ; and her hopes and fears on this subject alternated with fatiguing reiteration, and with a total incapacity of forming any judgment. Beauclerc's letter of explanation arrived, and other letters came from him from time to time, which, as they were only repetitions of hopes and fears as to Churchill's recovery, and of uncertainty as to what might be his own future fate, only increased Helen's misery ; and as even their expressions of devoted attachment could not alter her own determination, while she felt how cruel her continued silence must appear, they only agitated without relieving her mind. Mrs. Pennant sympathised with and soothed her, and knew how to soothe, and how to raise, and to sustain a mind in sorrow, suffering under disappointed affection, and sunk almost to despondency; for aunt Pennant, besides her softness of manner, and her quick intelligent sympathy, had power of consolation of a higher sort, beyond any which this world can give. She was very religious, of a cheerfully religious turn of mind — of that truly Christian spirit which hopeth all things. When she was a child somebody asked her if she was bred up in the fear of the Lord. She said no, but in the love of God. And so she was, in that love which casteth out fear. And now the mild- ness of her piety, and the whole tone and manner of her speaking and thinking, reminded Helen of that good dear uncle by whom she had been educated. She listened with affectionate reverence, and she truly and simply said, ' You do me good — I think you have done me a great deal of good — and you shall see it.' And she did see it afterwards, and Miss Clarendon thought it was her doing, and so her aunt let it pass, and was only glad the good was done. The first day Helen went down to the drawing-room, she found there a man who looked, as she thought at first glance, like a tradesman — some person, she supposed, come on business, standing waiting for Miss Clarendon, or Mrs. 445 HELEN Pennant. She scarcely looked at him, but passed on to the sofa, beside which was a little table set for her, and on it a beautiful work - box, which she began to examine and admire. ' Not nigh so handsome as I could have wished it, then, for you. Miss Helen — I ask pardon, Miss Stanley.' Helen looked up, surprised at hearing herself addressed by one whom she had thought a stranger ; but yet she knew the voice, and a reminiscence came across her mind of having seen him somewhere before. ' Old David Price, ma'am. Maybe you forget him, you being a child at that time. But since you grew up, you have been the saving of me and many more ' Stepping quite close to her, he whispered that he had been paid under her goodness's order by Mr. James, along with the other creditors that had been left. Helen by this time recollected who the poor Welshman was — an upholsterer and cabinet-maker, who had been years before employed at the Deanery. Never having been paid at the time, a very considerable debt had accumulated, and having neither note nor bond. Price said that he had despaired of ever obtaining the amount of his earnings. He had, however, since the Dean's death, been paid in full, and had been able to retire to his native village, which happened to be near Llansillen, and most grateful he was ; and as soon as he per- ceived that he was recognised, his gratitude became better able to express itself. Not well, however, could it make its way out for some time ; between crying and laughing, and between two languages, he was at first scarcely intelligible. Whenever much moved, David Price had recourse to his native Welsh, in which he was eloquent ; and Mrs. Pennant, on whom, knowing that she understood him, his eyes turned, was good enough to interpret for him. And when once fairly set agoing, there was danger that poor David's garrulous gratitude should flow for ever. But it was all honest ; not a word of flattery ; and his old face was in a glow and radiant with feeling, and the joy of telling Miss Helen all, how, and about it ; particularly concerning the last day when Mr. James paid him, and them, and all of them : that was a day Miss Stanley ought to have seen ; pity she could not have wit- nessed it ; it would have done her good to the latest hour of 446 Giving a shove to the work-box (?« the table. HELEN her life. Pity she should never see the faces of many, some poorer they might have been than himself ; many richer, that would have been ruined for ever but for her. For his own part, he reckoned himself one of the happiest of them all, in being allowed to see her face to face. And he hoped, as soon as she was able to get out so far — but it was not so far — she would come to see how comfortable he was in his own house. It ended at last in his giving a shove to the work-box on the table, which, though nothing worth otherwise, he knew she could not mislike, on account it was made out of all the samples of wood the Dean, her uncle, had given to him in former times. Notwithstanding the immoderate length of his speeches, and the impossibility he seemed to find of ending his visit, Helen was not much tired. And when she was able to walk so far, Mrs. Pennant took her to see David Price, and in a most comfortable house she found him ; and every one in that house, down to the youngest child, gathered round her by degrees, some more, some less shy, but all with gratitude beaming and smiling in their faces. It was delightful to Helen ; for there is no human heart so engrossed by sorrow, so overwhelmed by disappointment, so closed against hope of happiness, that will not open to the touch of gratitude. CHAPTER XLIV But there was still in Helen's inmost soul one deceitful hope. She thought she had pulled it up by the roots many times, and the last time completely ; but still a little fibre lurked, and still it grew again. It was the hope that Cecilia would keep that last promise, though at the moment Helen had flung from her the possibility ; yet now she took it up again, and she thought it was possible that Cecilia might be true to her word. If her child should be born alive, and IF it should be a boy ! It became a heart-beating suspense as the time ap- proached, and every day the news might be expected. The post came in but three times a week at Llansillen, and every post day Miss Clarendon repeated her prophecy to her aunt, 448 HELEN ' You will see, ma'am, the child will be born in good time, and alive. You who have always been so niuch afraid for Lady Cecilia, will find she has not feeling enough to do her any harm.' In due time came a note from the General. ' A boy ! child and mother doing well. Give me joy.' The joy to Miss Clarendon was much increased by the triumph in her own perfectly right opinion. Mrs. Pennant's was pure affectionate joy for the father, and for Lady Cecilia, for whom, all sinner as she was in her niece's eyes, this good soul had compassion. Helen's anxiety to hear again and again every post was very natural the aunt thought ; quite superfluous the niece deemed it : Lady Cecilia would do very well, no doubt, she prophesied again, and laughed at the tremor, the eagerness, with which Helen every day asked if there was any letter from Cecilia. At last one came, the first in her own handwriting, and it was to Helen herself, and it extinguished all hope. Helen could only articulate, ' O Cecilia ! ' Her emotion, her disappointment, were visible, but un- accountable : she could give no reason for it to Miss Clarendon, whose wondering eye was upon her ; nor even to sympathising aunt Pennant could she breathe a word without betraying Cecilia ; she was silent, and there was all that day, and many succeeding days, a hopelessness of languor in her whole appearance. There was, as Miss Clarendon termed it, a ' backsliding in her recovery,' which grieved aunt Pennant, and Helen had to bear imputation of caprice and of indolence from Miss Clarendon ; but even that eye immediately upon her, that eye more severe than ever, had not power to rouse her. Her soul was sunk within, nothing further to hope ; there was a dead calm, and the stillness and loneliness of Llansillen made that calm almost awful. The life of great excitation which she had led previous to her illness rendered her more sensible of the change, of the total want of stimulus. The walks to Price's cottage had been repeated, but, though it was a very bright spot, the eye could not always be fixed upon it. Bodily exertion being more easy to her now than mental, she took long walks, and came in boasting how far she had been, and looking quite exhausted. And Miss Clarendon 2 G 449 HELEN wondered at her wandering out alone ; then she tried to walk with Miss Clarendon, and she was more tired, though the walks were shorter — and that was observed, and was not agreeable either to the observer or to the observed. Helen endeavoured to make up for it ; she followed Miss Clarendon about in all her various occupations, from flower-garden to conservatory, and from conservatory to pheasantry, and to all her pretty cottages, and her schools, and she saw and admired all the good that Esther did so judiciously, and with such extraordinary, such wonderful energy. ' Nothing wonderful in it,' Miss Clarendon said . and as she ungraciously rejected praise, however sincere, and required not sympathy, Helen was reduced to be a mere silent, stupid, useless stander-by, and she could not but feel this a little awkward. She tried to interest herself for the poor people in the neighbourhood, but their language was unintelligible to her, and hers to them, and it is hard work trying to make objects for oneself in quite a new place, and with a preoc- cupying sorrow in the mind all the time. It was not only hard work to Helen, but it seemed labour in vain — bringing soil by handfuls to a barren rock, where, after all, no plant will take root. Miss Clarendon thought that labour could never be in vain. One morning, when it must be acknowledged that Helen had been sitting too long in the same position, with her head leaning on her hand. Miss Clarendon in her abrupt voice asked, ' How much longer, Helen, do you intend to sit there, doing only what is the worst thing in the world for you — thinking ? ' Helen started, and said she feared she had been sitting too long idle. ' If you wish to know how long, I can tell you,' said Miss Clarendon ; 'just one hour and thirteen minutes.' ' By the stop watch,' said Helen, smiling. ' By my watch,' said grave Miss Clarendon ; ' and in the meantime look at the quantity of work I have done.' ' And done so nicely ! ' said Helen, looking at it with admiration. ' Oh, do not think to bribe me with admiration ; I would rather see you do something yourself than hear you praise my doings.' 45° HELEN ' If I had anybody to work for. I have so few friends now in the world who would care for anything I could do ! But I win try — you shall see, my dear Esther, by and by.' ' By and by ! no, no — now. I cannot bear to see you any longer, in this half-alive, half-dead state.' 'I know,' said Helen, 'that all you say is for my good. I am sure your only object is my happiness.' ' Your happiness is not in my power or in yours, but it is in your power to deserve to be happy, by doing what is right — by exerting yourself : — that is my object, for I see you are in danger of being lost in indolence. Now you have the truth and the whole truth.' Many a truth would have come mended from Miss Clarendon's tongue if it had been uttered in a softer tone, and if she had paid a little more attention to times and seasons : but she held it the sacred duty of sincerity to tell a friend her faults as soon as seen, and without circumlocution. The next day Helen set about a drawing. She made it an object to herself to try to copy a view of the dear Deanery in the same style as several beautiful drawings of Miss Clarendon's. While she looked over her portfolio, several of her old sketches recalled remembrances which made her sigh frequently ; Miss Clarendon heard her, and said — ' I wish you would cure yourself of that habit of sighing ; it is very bad for you.' ' I know it,' said Helen. ' Despondency is not penitence,' continued Esther : ' reverie is not reparation.' She felt as desirous as ever to make Helen happy at Llansillen, but she was provoked to find it impossible to do so. Of a strong body herself, capable of great resistance, powerful reaction under disappointment or grief,- she could ill make allowance for feebler health and spirits — perhaps feebler character. For great misfortunes she had great sympathy, but she could not enter into the details of lesser sorrows, especially any of the sentimental kind, which she was apt to class altogether under the head — ' Sorrows of my Lord Plumcake ! ' an expression which had sovereignly taken her fancy, and which her aunt did not relish, or quite understand. Mrs. Pennant was, indeed, as complete a contrast to her 451 HELEN niece in tliese points as nature and habit joined could pro- duce. She was naturally of the most exquisitely sympathetic mimosa- sensibility, shrinking and expanding to the touch of others' joy or woe ; and instead of having by long use worn this out, she had preserved it wonderfully fresh in advanced years. But, notwithstanding the contrast and seemingly in- compatible difference between this aunt and niece, the founda- tions of their characters both being good, sound, and true, they lived on together well, and loved each other dearly. They had seldom differed so much on any point as in the present case, as to their treatment of their patient and their guest. Scarcely a day passed in which they did not come to some mutual remonstrance ; and sometimes when she was by, which was not pleasant to her, as may be imagined. Yet perhaps even these little altercations and annoyances, though they tried Helen's temper or grieved her heart at the moment, were of use to her upon the whole, by drawing her out of herself. Besides, these daily vicissitudes — made by human temper, manner, and character — supplied in some sort the total want of events, and broke the monotony of these tedious months. The General's bulletins, however, became at last more favourable : Mr. Churchill was decidedly better ; his physician hoped he might soon be pronounced out of danger. The General said nothing of Beauclerc, but that he was, he believed, still at Paris. And from this time forward no more letters came from Beauclerc to Helen ; as his hopes of Churchill's recovery increased, he expected every day to be released from his banishment, and was resolved to write no more till he could say that he was free. But Helen, though she did not allow it to herself, felt this deeply : she thought that her determined silence had at last convinced him that all pursuit of her was vain ; and that he submitted to her rejection : she told herself it was what should be, and yet she felt it bitterly. Lady Cecilia's letters did not mention him, indeed they scarcely told anything ; they had become short and constrained : the General, she said, advised her to go out more, and her letters often concluded in haste, with ' Carriage at the door,' and all the usual excuses of -t London life. One day when Helen was sitting intently drawing, JMiss Clarendon said ' Helen ! ' so suddenly that she started and looked round ; Miss Clarendon was seated on a low stool at 452 HELEN her aunt's feet, with one arm thrown over her great dog's neck ; he had laid his head on her lap, and resting on him, she looked up with a steadiness, a fixity of repose, which brought to Helen's mind Raphael's beautiful figure of Fortitude leaning on her lion ; she thought she had never before seen Miss Clarendon look so handsome, so graceful, so interesting ; she took care not to say so, however. ' Helen ! ' continued Miss Clarendon, ' do you remember the time when I was at Clarendon Park and quitted it so abruptly ? My reasons were good, whatever my manner was ; the opinion of the world I am not apt to fear for myself, or even for my brother, but to the whispers of conscience I do listen. Helen ! I was conscious that certain feelings in my mind were too strong, — in me, you would scarcely believe it — too tender. I had no reason to think that Granville Beauclerc liked me ; it was therefore utterly unfit that I should think of him : I felt this, I left Clarendon Park, and from that moment I have refused myself the pleasure of his society, I have altogether ceased to think of him. This is the only way to conquer a hopeless attachment. But you, Helen, though you have commanded him never to attempt to see you again, have not been able to command your own mind. Since Mr. Churchill is so much better, you expect that he will soon be pronounced out of danger — you expect that Mr. Beauclerc will come over — come here, and be at your feet ! ' ' I expect nothing,' said Helen in a faltering voice, and then added resolutely, ' I cannot foresee what Mr. Beauclerc may do ; but of this be assured. Miss Clarendon, that until I stand as I once stood, and as I deserve to stand, in the opinion of your brother ; unless, above all, I can bring proofs to Granville's confiding heart that I have ever been unimpeach- able of conduct and of mind, and in all but one circumstance true — true as yourself, Esther — never, never, though your brother and all the world consented, never till I myself felt that I ^3.1, proved to be as worthy to be his wife as I think I am, would I consent to marry him — no, not though my heart were to break.' ' I believe it,' said Mrs. Pennant ; ' and I wish — oh, how I wish ' ' That Lady Cecilia were hanged, as she deserves,' said Miss Clarendon : ' so do I, I am sure ; but that is nothing to the present purpose.' 453 HELEN ' No, indeed,' said Helen. ' Helen ! ' continued Esther, ' remember that Lady Blanche Forrester is at Paris.' Helen shrank. ' Lady Cecilia tells you there is no danger ; I say there is.' ' Why should you say so, my dear Esther ? ' said her aunt. ' Has not this friend of yours always deceived, misled you, Helen ? ' ' She can have no motive for deceiving me in this,' said Helen : ' I believe her.' ' Believe her then ! ' cried Miss Clarendon ; ' believe her, and do not believe me, and take the consequences : I have done.' Helen sighed, but though she might feel the want of the charm of Lady Cecilia's suavity of manner, of her agreeable, and her agreeing temper, yet she felt the safe solidity of principle in her present friend, and admired, esteemed, and loved, without fear of change, her unblenching truth. Pretty ornaments of gold cannot be worked out of the native ore ; to fashion the rude mass some alloy must be used, and when the slight filigree of captivating manner comes to be tested against the sterling worth of unalloyed sincerity, weighed in the just balance of adversity, we are glad to seize the solid gold, and leave the ornaments to those that they deceive. The fear about Lady Blanche Forrester was, however, soon set at rest, and this time Lady Cecilia was right. A letter from her to Helen announced that Lady Blanche was married ! — actually married, and not to Granville Beauclerc, but to some other English gentleman at Paris, no matter whom. Lord Beltravers and Madame de St. Cymon, disappointed, had returned to London ; Lady Cecilia had seen Lord Beltravers, and heard the news from him. There could be no doubt of the truth of the intelligence, and scarcely did Helen herself rejoice in it with more sincerity than did Miss Clarendon, and Helen loved her for her candour as well as for her sympathy. Time passed on ; week after week rolled away. At last General Clarendon announced to his sister, but without one word to Helen, that Mr. Churchill was pronounced out of danger. The news had been sent to his ward, the General said, and he expected Granville would return from his banish- ment immediately. 454 HELEN Quite taken up in the first tumult of her feelings at this intelligence, Helen scarcely observed that she had no letter from CeciUa. But even aunt Pennant was obliged to confess, in reply to her niece's observation, that this was ' certainly very odd ; but we shall soon hear some explanation, I hope.' Miss Clarendon shook her head ; she said that she had always thought how matters would end ; she judged from her brother's letters that he began to find out that he was not the happiest of men. Yet nothing to that effect was ever said by him ; one phrase only excepted, in his letter to her on her last birth- day, which began with, ' In our happy days, my dear Esther.' Miss Clarendon said nothing to Helen upon this subject ; she refrained altogether from mentioning Lady Cecilia. Two, three post-days passed without bringing any letter to Helen. The fourth, very early in the morning, long before the usual time for the arrival of the post. Rose came into her room with a letter in her hand, saying, ' From General Clarendon, ma'am. His own man, Mr. Cockbum, has just this minute arrived, ma'am — from London.' With a trembling hand Helen tore the letter open : not one word from General Clarendon ! It was only a cover, con- taining two notes ; one from Lord Davenant to the General, the other from Lady Davenant to Helen. Lord Davenant said that Lady Davenant's health had declined so alarmingly after their arrival at Petersburg that he had insisted upon her return to England, and that, as soon as the object of his mission was completed, he should immediately follow her. A vessel, he said, containing letters from England, had been lost, so that they were in total ignorance of what had occurred at home ; and indeed it appeared from the direction of Lady Davenant's note to Helen, written on her landing in England, that she had left Russia without knowing that the marriage had been broken off, or that Helen had quitted General Clarendon's. She wrote — ' Let me see you and Granville once more before I die. Be in London, at my own house, to meet me. I shall be there as soon as I can be moved.' The initials only of her name were signed. Elliott added a postscript, saying that her lady had suffered much from an unusually long passage, and that she was not sure what day they could be in town. 455 ' Front General Clarendon, ma'am. ' HELEN There was nothing from Lady CeciHa. Cockbum said that her ladyship had not been at home when he set out ; that his master had ordered him to travel all night, to get to Llansillen as fast as possible, and to make no delay in delivering the letter to Miss Stanley. To set out instantly, to be in town at her house to meet Lady Davenant, was, of course, Helen's immediate determina- tion. General Clarendon had sent his travelling carriage for her ; and under the circumstances, her friends could have no wish but to speed her departure. Miss Clarendon expressed surprise at there being no letter from Lady Cecilia, and would see and question Cockbum herself; but nothing more was to be learned than what he had already told, that the packet from Lady Davenant had come by express to his master after Lady Ceciha had driven out, as it had been her custom of late, almost every day, to Kensington, to see her child. Nothing could be more natural, Mrs. Pennant thought, and she only wondered at Esther's unconvinced look of suspicion. ' Nothing, surely, can be more natural, my dear Esther.' To which Esther replied, 'Very likely, ma'am.' Helen was too much hurried and too much engrossed by the one idea of Lady Davenant to think of what they said. At parting she had scarcely time even to thank her two friends for all their kindness, but they understood her feelings, and, as Miss Clarendon said, words on that point were unnecessary. Aunt Pennant embraced her again and again, and then let her go, saying, ' I must not detain you, my dear.' ' But I must,' said Miss Clarendon, ' for one moment. There is one point on which my parting words are necessary. Helen ! keep clear of Lady Cecilia's affairs, whatever they may be. Hear none of her secrets.' Helen wished she had never heard any ; did not believe there were any more to hear ; but she promised herself and Miss Clarendon that she would observe this excellent counsel. And now she was in the carriage, and on her road to town. And now she had leisure to breathe, and to think, and to feel. Her thoughts and feelings, however, could be only repetitions of fears and hopes about Lady Davenant, and uncertainty and dread of what would happen when she should require explan- ation of all that had occurred in her absence. And how would Lady Cecilia be able to meet her mother's penetration ? — ill 457 HELEN or well, Lady Davenant was so clear-sighted. 'And how shall I,' thought Helen, ' without plunging deeper in deceit, avoid revealing the truth ? Shall I assist Cecilia to deceive her mother in her last moments ; or shall I break my promise, betray Cecilia's secret, and at last be the death of her mother by the shock ? ' It is astonishing how often the mind can go over the same thoughts and feelings without coming to any conclusion, any ease from racking suspense. In the mean- time, on rolled the carriage, and Cockburn, according to his master's directions, got her over the ground with all conceiv- able speed. CHAPTER XLV When they were within the last stage of London the carriage suddenly stopped, and Helen, who was sitting far back, deep in her endless reverie, started forward — Cockburn was at the carriage-door. ' My lady, coming to meet you. Miss Stanley.' It was Cecilia herself But Cecilia so changed in her whole appearance that Helen would scarcely have known her. She was so much struck that she hardly knew what was said : but the carriage -doors were opened, and Lady Cecilia was beside her, and Cockburn shut the door without permitting one moment's delay, and on they drove. Lady Cecilia was excessively agitated. Helen had not power to utter a word, and was glad that Cecilia went on speaking very fast ; though she spoke without appearing to know well what she was saying : of Helen's goodness in coming so quickly, of her fears that she would never have been in time — ' but she was in time, — her mother had not yet arrived. Clarendon had gone to meet her on the road, she believed — she was not quite certain.' That seemed very extraordinary to Helen. ' Not quite certain ? ' said she. ' No, I am not,' replied Cecilia, and she coloured ; her very pale cheek flushed ; but she explained not at all, she left that subject, and spoke of the friends Helen had left at Llansillen — then suddenly of her mother's return — her hopes 4S8 HELEN — her fears — and then, without going on to the natural idea of seeing her mother, and of how soon they should see her, began to talk of Beauclerc — of Mr. Churchill's being quite out of danger — of the General's expectation of Beauclerc's immediate return. 'And then, my dearest Helen,' said she, 'all will be ' Oh ! I do not know how it will be ! ' cried she, her tone changing suddenly ; and, from the breathless hurry in which she had been running on, sinking at once to a low broken tone, and speaking very slowly. ' I cannot tell what will become of any of us. We can never be happy again — any one of us. And it is all my doing — and I cannot die. O Helen, when I tell you ' She stopped, and Miss Clarendon's warning counsel, all her own past experience, were full in Helen's mind ; and after a moment's silence, she stopped Ceciha just as she seemed to have gathered power to speak, and begged that she would not tell her anything that was to be kept secret. She could not, would not, hear any secrets ; she turned her head aside, and let down the glass, and looked out, as if determined not to be compelled to receive this confidence. ' Have you, then, lost all interest, all affection, for me, Helen ? I deserve it ! But you need not fear me now, Helen : I have done with deception, would to Heaven I had never begun with it ! ' It was the tone and look of truth — she steadily fixed her eyes upon Helen — and instead of the bright beams that used to play in those eyes, there was now a dark deep-seated sorrow, almost despair. Helen was touched to the heart : it was indeed impossible for her — ^it would have been impossible for any one who had any feehng — to have looked upon Lady Cecilia Clarendon at that moment, and to have recollected what she had so lately been, without pity. The friend of her childhood looked upon her with all the poignant anguish of compassion — ' O my dear Cecilia ! how changed ! ' Helen was not sensible that she uttered the words 'how changed ! ' ' Changed ! yes, I believe I am,' said Lady Cecilia, in a calm voice, ' very much changed in appearance, but much more in reaHty ; my mind is more altered than my person. O Helen ! if you could see into my mind at this moment, 459 HELEN and know how completely it is changed ; — but it is all in vain now ! You have suffered, and suffered for me ! but your sufferings could not equal mine. You lost love and happi- ness, but still conscious of deserving both : I had both at my command, and I could enjoy neither under the con- sciousness, the torture, of remorse.' Helen threw her arms round her, and exclaimed, ' Do not think of me ! — all will be well — since you have resolved on the truth, all will yet be well.' Cecilia sighed deeply and went on. ' I am sure, Helen, you were surprised that my child was born alive ; at least I was. I believe its mother had not feeling enough to endanger its existence. Well, Clarendon has that comfort at all events, and, as a boy, it will never put him in mind of his mother. Well, Helen, I had hopes of myself to the last minute ; I really and truly hoped, as I told you, that I should have had courage to tell him all when I put the child into his arms. But his joy ! — I could not dash his joy — I could not ! — and then I thought I never could. 1 knew you would give me up ; I gave up all hope of myself I was very unhappy, and Clarendon thought I was very ill ; and I acknowledge that I was anxious about you, and let all the blame fall on you, innocent, generous creature ! I heard my husband perpetually upbraiding you when he saw me ill — all, he said, the conse- quences of your falsehood — and all the time I knew it was my own. ' My dear Helen, it is impossible to tell you all the daily, hourly necessities for dissimulation which occurred. Every day, you know, we were to send to inquire for Mr. Churchill ; and every day when Clarendon brought me the bulletin, he pitied me, and blamed you ; and the double-dealing in my counte- nance he never suspected — always interpreted favourably. Oh, such confidence as he had in me — and how it has been wasted, abused ! Then letters from Beauclerc — how I bore to hear them read 1 cannot conceive : and at each time that I escaped, I rejoiced and reproached myself — and reproached myself and rejoiced. I succeeded in every effort at deception, and was cursed by my own success. Encouraged to proceed, I soon went on without shame and without fear. The General heard me defending you against the various reports which my A'enomous cousin had circulated, and he only admired what 460 HELEN he called " my amiable zeal." His love for me increased, but it gave me no pleasure : for, Helen, now I am going to tell you an extraordinary turn which my mind took, for which I cannot account — I can hardly believe it — it seems out of human nature — my love for him decreased ! — not only because I felt that he would hate me if he discovered my deceit, but because he was lowered in my estimation ! I had always had, as everybody has, even my mother, the highest opinion of his judgment. To that judgment I had always looked up ; it had raised me in my own opinion ; it was a motive to me to be equal to what he thought me : but now that motive was gone, I no longer looked up to him ; his credulous affection had blinded his judgment — he was my dupe ! I could not reverence — I could not love one who was my dupe. But I cannot tell you how shocked I was at myself when I felt my love for him decrease every time I saw him. ' I thought myself a monster ; I had grown used to every- thing but that — that I could not endure ; it was a darkness of the mind — a coldness ; it was as if the sun had gone out of the universe ; it was more — it was worse — it was as if I was alone in the world. Home was a desert to me. I went out every evening ; sometimes, but rarely. Clarendon accompanied me : he had become more retired ; his spirits had declined with mine ; and though he was glad I should go out and amuse myself, yet he was always exact as to the hours of my return. I was often late — later than I ought to have been, and I made a multitude of paltry excuses ; this it was, I believe, which first shook his faith in my truth ; but I was soon detected in a more decided failure. ' You know I never had the least taste for play of any kind : you may remember I used to be scolded for never minding what I was about at icarU ; in short, I never had the least love for it — it wearied me ; but now that my spirits were gone it was a sort of intoxication in which I cannot say I in- dulged- — for it was no indulgence — but to which I had recourse. Louisa Castlefort, you know, was always fond of play — got into her first difficulties by that means — she led me on. I lost a good deal of money to her, and did not care about it as long as I could pay ; but presently it came to a time when I could not pay without applying to the General : I applied to him, but under false pretences — to pay this bill or that, or to 461 HELEN buy something, which I never bought : this occurred so often and to such extent that he suspected — he discovered how it went ; he told me so. He spoke in that low, suppressed, that terrible voice which I had heard once before ; I said, I know not what, in deprecation of his anger. " I am not angry, Cecilia," said he. I caught his hand and would have detained him ; he withdrew that hand, and, looking at me, exclaimed, " Beautiful creature ! half those charms would I give for truth/" He left the room, and there was contempt in his look. ' All my love — all my reverence — returned for him in an instant ; but what could I say ? He never recurred to the subject ; and now, when I saw the struggle in his mind, my passion for him returned in all its force. ' People who flattered me often, you know, said I was fascinating, and I determined to use my powers of fascination to regain my husband's heart ; how little I knew that heart ! I dressed to please him — oh ! I never dressed myself with such care in my most coquettish days ; — I gave a splendid ball ; I dressed to please him — he used to be delighted with my dancing : he had said, no matter what, but I wanted to make him say it — feel it — again ; he neither said nor felt it. I saw him standing looking at me, and at the close of the dance I heard from him one sigh. I was more in love with him than when first we were married, and he saw it, but that did not restore me to his confidence — his esteem ; nothing could have done that but — what I had not. One step in dissimulation led to another. ' After Lord Beltravers returned from Paris on Lady Blanche's marriage, I used to meet him continually at Louisa Castlefort's. As for play, that was over with me for ever, but I went to Louisa's continually, because it was the gayest house I could go to ; I used to meet Lord Beltravers there, and he pretended to pay me a vast deal of attention, to which I was utterly indifferent, but his object was to push his sister into society again by my means. He took advantage of that un- fortunate note which I had received from Madame de St. Cymon when she was at Old Forest ; he wanted me to admit her among my acquaintance ; he urged it in every possible way, and was excessively vexed that it would not do : not that he cared for her ; he often spoke of her in a way that shocked me, but it hurt his pride that she should be excluded from the 462 HELEN society to which her rank entitled her. I had met her at Louisa's once or twice ; but when I found that for her brother's sake she was always to be invited, I resolved to go there no more, and I made a merit of this with Clarendon. He was pleased ; he said, " That is well, that is right, my dear Cecilia." And he went out more with me. One night at tjie opera, the Comtesse de St. Cymon was in the box opposite to us, no lady with her, only some gentlemen. She watched me ; I did all I could to avoid her eye, but at an unlucky moment she caught mine, bent forward, and had the assurance to bow. The General snatched the opera-glass from my hand, made sure who it was, and then said to me, ' " How does that woman dare to claim your notice, Lady Cecilia ? I am afraid there must have been some encourage- ment on your part." ' " None," said I, " nor ever shall be ; you see I take no notice." ' " But you must have taken notice, or this could never be." ' " No indeed ! " persisted L ' Helen ! I really forgot at the moment that first unfortunate note. An instant afterwards I recollected it, and the visit about the cameos, but that was not my fault. I had, to be sure, dropped a card in return at her door, and I ought to have mentioned that, but I really did not recollect it till the words had passed my lips, and then it was too late, and I did not like to go back and spoil my case by an exception. The General did not look quite satisfied ; he did not receive my assertions as implicitly as formerly. He left the box afterwards to speak to some one, and while he was gone in came Lord Beltravers. After some preliminary nothings, he went directly to the point ; and said in an assured manner, " I believe you do not know my sister at this distance. She has been en- deavouring to catch your eye." ' " The Comtesse de St. Cymon does me too much honour," said I, with a slight inclination of the head, and elevation of the eyebrow, which spoke sufficiently plainly. ' Unabashed, and with a most provoking, almost sneering look, he replied, " Madame de St. Cymon had wished to say a few words to your ladyship on your own account ; am I to understand this cannot be ? " '"On my own account?" said I, "I do not in the least 463 HELEN understand your lordship." " I am not sure," said he, " that I perfectly comprehend it. But I know that you sometimes drive to Kensington, and sometimes take a turn in the gardens there. My sister lives at Kensington, and could not she, without infringing etiquette, meet you in your walk, and have the honour of a few words with you ? Something she wants to say to you," and here he lowered his voice, " about a locket, and Colonel D'Aubigny." ' Excessively frightened, and hearing some one at the door, I answered, " I do not know, I believe I shall drive to Kensington to-morrow." He bowed delighted, and relieved me from his presence that instant. The moment afterwards General Clarendon came in. He asked me, " Was not that Lord Beltravers whom I met ? " ' "Yes," said 1 ; "he came to reproach me for not noticing his sister, and I answered him in such a manner as to make him clear that there was no hope." ' "You did right," said he, "if you did so.'' My mind was in such confusion that I could not quite command my counte- nance, and I put up my fan as if the lights hurt me. ' " Cecilia," said he, " take care what you are about. Re- member, it is not my request only, but my command to my wife " (he laid solemn stress on the words) " that she should have no communication with this woman." ' " My dear Clarendon, I have not the least wish." ' " I do not ask what your wishes may be ; I require onl)' your obedience." ' Never have I heard such austere words from him. I turned to the stage, and I was glad to seize the first minute I could to get away. But what was to be done ? If I did not go to Kensington, there was this locket, and I knew not what, standing out against me. I knew that this wretched woman had had Colonel D'Aubigny in her train abroad, and supposed that he must — treacherous profligate as he was — have given the locket to her, and now I was so afraid of its coming to Clarendon's eyes or ears ! — and yet \vhy should I have feared his knowing about it ? Colonel D'Aubigny stole it, just as he stole the picture. I had got it for you, do you re- collect ? ' 'Perfectly,' said Helen, ' and your mother missed it.' ' Yes,' continued Lady Cecilia. ' Oh that I had had the 464 HELEN sense to do nothing about it ! But I was so afraid of its somehow bringing everything to hght ; my cowardice — my conscience — my consciousness of that first fatal falsehood before my marriage has haunted me at the most critical moments ; it has risen against me, and stood like an evil spirit threatening me from the right path. ' I went to Kensington, trusting to my own good fortune, which had so often stood me in stead ; but Madame de St. Cymon was too cunning for me, and so interested, so mean, she actually bargained for giving up the locket. She hinted that she knew Colonel D'Aubigny had never been your lover, and ended by saying she had not the locket with her ; and though I made her understand that the General would never allow me to receive her at my own house, yet she "hoped I could manage an introduction for her to some of my friends, and that she would bring the locket on Monday, if I would in the meantime try, at least with Lady Emily Greville and Mrs. Holdernesse." ' I felt her meanness, and yet I was almost as mean myself, for I agreed to do what I could. Monday came, Clarendon saw me as I was going out, and, as he handed me into the carriage, he asked me where I was going. To Kensington I said, and added — O Helen, I am ashamed to tell you, I added, — I am going to see my child. And there I found Madame de St. Cymon, and I had to tell her of my failure with Lady Emily and Mrs. Holdernesse. I softened their refusal as much as I could, but I might have spared myself the trouble, for she only retorted by something about English prudery. At this moment a shower of rain came on, and she insisted upon my taking her home ; " Come in," said she, when the carriage stopped at her door ; " if you will come in, I will give it to you now, and you need not have the trouble of calling again." I had the folly to yield, though I saw that it was a trick to decoy me into her house, and to make it pass for a visit. It all flashed upon me, and yet I could not resist, for I thought I must obtain the locket at all hazards. I resolved to get it from her before I left the house, and then I thought all would be finished. ' She looked triumphant as she followed me into her saloon, and gave a malicious smile, which seemed to say, " You see you are visiting me after all." After some nonsensical con- 2 H 465 ' Clarendon stood opposite to me ! HELEN versation, meant to detain me, I pressed for the locket, and she produced it : it was indeed the very one that had been made for you. But just at that instant, while she still held it in her hand, the door suddenly opened, and Clarendon stood opposite to me ! ' I heard Madame de St. Cymon's voice, but of what she said I have no idea. I heard nothing but the single word " rain," and with scarcely strength to articulate, I attempted to follow up that excuse. Clarendon's look of contempt ! But he commanded himself, advanced calmly to me, and said, " I came to Kensington with these letters ; they have just arrived by express. Lady Davenant is in England — she is ill." He gave me the packet, and left the room, and I heard the sound of his horse's feet the next instant as he rode off. I broke from Madame de St. Cymon, forgetting the locket and everything. I asked my servants which way the General had gone. " To town." I perceived that he must have been going to look for me at the nurse's, and had seen the carriage at Madame de St. Cymon's door. I hastened after him, and then I recollected that I had left the locket on the table at Madame de St. Cymon's, that locket for which I had hazarded — lost — everything ! The moment I reached home, I ran to Clarendon's room ; he was not there, and oh, Helen, I have not seen him since ! ' From some orders which he left about horses, I suppose he went to meet my mother. I dared not follow him. She had desired me to wait for her arrival at her own house. All yesterday, all last night, Helen, what I have suffered ! I could not bear it any longer, and then I thought of coming to meet you. I thought I must see you before my mother arrived — my mother ! but Clarendon will not have met her till to-day. O Helen ! you feel all that I fear — all that I foresee.' Lady Cecilia sank back, and Helen, overwhelmed with all she had heard, could for some time only pity her in silence ; and at last could only suggest that the General would not have time for any private communication with Lady Davenant, as her woman would be in the carriage with her, and the General was on horseback. It was late in the day before they reached town. As they came near Grosvenor Square, Cockburn inquired whether they were to drive home, or to Lady Davenant's, 467 HELEN ' To my mother's, certainly, and as fast as you can.' Lady Davenant had not arrived, but there were packages in the hall, her courier, and her servants, who said that General Clarendon was with her, but not in the carriage ; he had sent them on. No message for Lady Ceciha, but that Lady Davenant would be in town this night. To-night — some hours still of suspense ! As long as there were arrangements to be made, anything to do or to think of but that meeting of which they dared not think, it was en- durable, but too soon all was settled ; nothing to be done, but to wait and watch, to hear the carriages roll past, and listen, and start, and look at each other, and sink back disappointed. Lady Cecilia walked from the sofa to the window, and looked out, and back again — continually, continually, till at last Helen begged her to sit down. She sat down before an old pianoforte of her mother's, on which her eyes fixed ; it was one on which she had often played with Helen when they were children. 'Happy, innocent days,' said she; 'never shall we be so happy again, Helen ! But I cannot think of it ' ; she rose hastily, and threw herself on the sofa. A servant, who had been watching at the hall-door, came in — ' The carriage, my lady ! Lady Davenant is coming.' Lady Cecilia started up ; they ran downstairs ; the carriage stopped, and in the imperfect light they saw the figure of Lady Davenant, scarcely altered, leaning upon General Clarendon's arm. The first sound of her voice was feebler, softer, than formerly — quite tender, when she said, as she embraced them both by turns, ' My dear children ! ' ' You have accomplished your journey, Lady Davenant, better than you expected,' said the General. Something struck her in the tone of his voice. She turned quickly, saw her daughter lay her hand upon his arm, and saw that arm withdrawn ! They all entered the saloon — it was a blaze of light ; Lady Davenant, shading her eyes with her hand, looked round at the countenances, which she had not yet seen. Lady Cecilia shrank back. The penetrating eyes turned from her, glanced at Helen, and fixed upon the General. ' What is all this .? ' cried she. Helen threw her arms round Lady Davenant. ' Let us think of you first, and only — be calm.' 468 HELEN Lady Davenant broke from her, and pressing forwards ex- claimed, ' I must see my daughter — if I have still a daughter ! Cecilia ! ' The General moved. Lady Cecilia, who had sunk upon a chair behind him, attempted to rise. Lady Davenant stood opposite to her ; the light was now full upon her face and figure ; and her mother saw how it was changed ! and looking back at Helen, she said in a low, awful tone, ' I see it ; the black spot has spread ! ' Scarcely had Lady Davenant pronounced these words, when she was seized with violent spasms. The General had but just time to save her from falling ; he could not leave her. All was terror ! Even her own woman, so long used to these attacks, said it was the worst she had ever seen, and for some time evidently feared it would terminate fatally. At last slowly she came to herself, but perfectly in possession of her intellects, she sat up, looked round, saw the agony in her daughter's countenance, and holding out her hand to her, said, ' Cecilia, if there is anything that I ought to know, it should be said now.' Cecilia caught her mother's hand, and threw herself upon her knees. ' Helen, Helen, stay ! ' cried she ; ' do not go, Clarendon ! ' He stood leaning against the chimneypiece, motionless, while Cecilia, in a faltering voice, began ; her voice gaining strength, she went on, and poured out all — even from the very beginning, that first suppression of the truth, that first cowardice, then all that followed from that one falsehood — all — even to the last degradation, when in the power, in the presence, of that bad woman, her husband found and left her. She shuddered as she came to the thought of that look of his, and not daring, not having once dared while she spoke, to turn towards him, her eyes fixed upon her mother's ; but as she finished speaking, her head sank, she laid her face on the sofa beside her ; she felt her mother's arm thrown over her and she sobbed convulsively. There was silence. ' I have still a daughter ! ' were the first words that broke the silence. ' Not sucli as I might have had, but that is my own fault.' ' O mother ! ' I have still a daughter ! ' repeated Lady Davenant. ' There 469 HELEN is,' continued she, turning to General Clarendon, 'there is a redeeming power in truth. She may yet be more worthy to be your wife than she has ever yet been ! ' ' Never ! ' exclaimed the General. His countenance was rigid as iron ; then suddenly it relaxed, and going up to Helen, he said, ' I have done you injustice, Miss Stanley. I have been misled. I have done you injustice, and by Heaven ! I will do you public justice, cost me what it will. Beauclerc will be in England in a few days ; at the altar I will give you to him publicly ; in the face of all the world will I mark my approba- tion of his choice ; publicly will I repair the wrong I have done you. I will see his happiness and yours before I leave England for ever ! ' Lady Cecilia started up : ' Clarendon ! ' was all she could say. ' Yes, Lady Cecilia Clarendon,' said he, all the stern fixed- ness of his face returning at once — 'Yes, Lady Cecilia Clarendon, we separate, now and for ever.' Then turning from her, he addressed Lady Davenant. ' 1 shall be ordered on some foreign service. Your daughter, Lady Davenant, will remain with you, while I am still in England, unless you wish otherwise ' 'Leave my daughter with me, my dear General, till my death,' said Lady Davenant. She spoke calmly, but the General, after a respectful — an affectionate pressure of the hand she held out to him, said, ' That may be far distant, I trust in God, and we shall at all events meet again the day of Helen's marriage.' 'And if that day is to be a happy day to me,' cried Helen, ' to me or to your own beloved ward. General Clarendon, it must be happy to Cecilia ! ' ' As happy as she has left it in my power to make her. When I am gone, my fortune ' ' Name it not as happiness for my daughter,' interrupted Lady Davenant, ' or you do her injustice. General Clarendon.' ' I name it but to do her justice,' said he. 'It is all that she has left it in my power to give ' ; and then his long-sup- pressed passion suddenly bursting forth, he turned to Ceciha. ' All 1 can give to one so false — false from the first moment to the last — false to me — to me ! who so devotedly, fondly, blindly loved her ! ' He rushed out of the room. 470 HELEN Then Lady Davenant, taking her daughter in her arms, said, ' My child, return to me ! ' She sank back exhausted. Mrs. EHiott was summoned, she wished them all out of the room, and said so ; but Lady Davenant would have her daughter stay beside her, and with Cecilia's hand in hers she fell into a profound slumber. CHAPTER XLVI On awaking in the morning, after some long-expected event has happened, we feel in doubt whether it has really occurred, or whether it is all a dream. Then comes the awful sense of waking truth, and the fear that what has been done, or said, is irremediable, and then the astonishment that it really is done. ' It is over ! ' Helen repeated to herself, repeated aloud, be- fore she could well bring herself from that state of half-belief, before she could recover her stunned faculties. Characters which she thought she perfectly understood had each appeared, in these new circumstances, different from what she had expected. From Cecilia she had scarcely hoped, even at the last moment, for such perfect truth in her confession. From Lady Davenant not so much indulgence, not all that tenderness for her daughter. From the General, less violence of expression, more feeling for Cecilia ; he had not allowed the merit of her candour, her courage, at the last. It was a perfectly voluntary confession, all that concerned Colonel D'Aubigny and the letters could never have been known to the General by any other means. Disappointed love, confi- dence duped, and his pride of honour, had made him forget himself in anger, even to cruelty. Helen thought he would feel this hereafter, fancied he must feel it even now, but that, though he might relent, he would not recede ; though Jae might regret that he had made the determination, he would certainly abide by it ; that which he had resolved to do would certainly be done, — the separation between him and Cecilia would take place. And though all was clear and bright in Helen's own prospects, the General's esteem restored, his approbation to be 471 HELEN publicly marked, Beauclerc to be convinced of her perfect innocence ! Beauclerc, freed from all fear and danger, return- ing all love and joy ; yet she could not be happy — it was all mixed with bitterness, anguish for Cecilia. She had so often so forcibly urged her to this confession ! and now it was made, did Helen regret that it was made ? No, independently of her own cleared character, she was satisfied, even for Cecilia's sake, for it was right, whatever were the con- sequences ; it was right, and in the confusion and discordance of her thoughts and feelings, this was the only fixed point. To this conclusion she had come, but had not been able further to settle her mind, when she was told that Lady Davenant was now awake, and wished to see her. Lady Davenant, renovated by sleep, appeared to Helen, even when she saw her by daylight, scarcely altered in her looks. There was the same life, and energy, and elasticity, and strength, Helen hoped, not only of mind, but of body, and quick as that hope rose, as she stood beside her bed, and looked upon her, Lady Davenant marked it, and said, ' You are mistaken, my dear Helen, I shall not last long ; I am now to consider how I am to make the most of the little life that remains. How to repair as far as may be, as far as can be, in my last days, the errors of my youth ! You know, Helen, what I mean, and it is now no time to waste words, therefore I shall not begin by wasting upon you, Helen, any reproaches. Foolish, generous, weak creature that you are, and as the best of human beings will ever be — I must be content with you as you are ; and so,' continued she, in a playful tone, ' we must love one another, perhaps all the better, for not being too per- fect. And indeed, my poor child, you have been well punished already, and the worst of criminals need not be punished twice. Of the propensity to sacrifice your own happiness for others you will never be cured, but you will, I trust, in future, when I am gone never to return, be true to yourself. Now as to my daughter ' Lady Davenant then went over with Helen every circum- stance in Cecilia's confession, and showed how, in the midst of the shock she had felt at the disclosure of so much false- hood, hope for her daughter's future truth had risen in her mind even from the courage, and fulness, and exactness of her confession. ' And it is not,' continued she, ' a sudden reforma- 472 HELEN tion ; I have no belief in sudden reformations. I think I see that this change in Cecilia's mind has been some time working out by her own experience of the misery, the folly, the degrada- tion of deceit.' Helen earnestly confirmed this from her own observations, and from the expressions which had burst forth in the fulness of Cecilia's heart and strength of her conviction, when she told her all that had passed in her mind. ' That is well ! ' pursued Lady Davenant ; ' but principles cannot be depended upon till confirmed by habit ; and Cecilia's nature is so variable — impressions on her are easily, even deeply made, but all in sand ; they may shift with the next tide — may be blown away by the next wind.' ' Oh no,' exclaimed Helen, ' there is no danger of that. I see the impression deepening every hour, from your kindness and ' Helen hesitated, ' and besides ' '■Besides^ said Lady Davenant, 'usually comes as the arriere-ban of weak reasons : you mean to say that the sight of my sufferings must strengthen, must confirm, all her prin- ciples — her taste for truth. Yes,' continued she, in her most firm tone ; ' Cecilia's being with me during my remaining days will be painful but salutary to her. She sees, as you do, that all the falsehood meant to save me has been in vain ; that at last the shock has only hastened my end : it must be so, Helen. Look at it steadily, in the best point of view — the evil you cannot avert ; take the good and be thankful for it.' And CeciHa — how did she feel ? Wretched she was, but still in her wretchedness there was within her a relieved con- science and the sustaining power of truth ; and she had now the support of her mother's affection, and the consolation of feeling that she had at last done Helen justice ! To her really generous, affectionate disposition, there was in the return of her feelings to their natural course an indescribable sense of relief. Broken, crushed, as were all her own hopes, her sym- pathy, even in the depths of her misery, now went pure, free from any windings of deceit, direct to Helen's happy prospects, in which she shared with all the eagerness of her warm heart. Beauclerc arrived, found the General at home expecting him, and in his guardian's countenance and voice he saw and heard only what was natural to the man. The General was prepared, and Beauclerc was himself in too great impatience 473 HELEN to hear the facts, to attend much to the manner in which things were told. ' Lady Davenant has returned ill ; her daughter is with her, and Helen ' 'And Helen ' ' And you may be happy, Beauclerc, if there be truth in woman,' said the General. ' Go to her — you will find I can do justice. Go, and return when you can tell me that your wedding-day is fixed. And, Beauclerc,' he called after him, ' let it be as soon as possible.' ' The only unnecessary advice my dear guardian has ever given me,' Beauclerc, laughing, replied. The General's prepared composure had not calculated upon this laugh, this slight jest ; his features gave way. Beauclerc, struck with a sudden change in the General's countenance, released his hand from the congratulatory shake in which its power failed. The General turned away as if to shun inquiry, and Beauclerc, however astonished, respected his feelings, and said no more. He hastened to Lady Davenant with all a lover's speed — with all a lover's joy saw the first expression in Helen's eyes ; and with all a friend's sorrow for Lady Davenant and for the General, heard all that was to be told of Lady Cecilia's affairs : her mother undertook the explanation, CeciUa herself did not appear. In the first rush of Beauclerc's joy in Helen's cleared fame, he was ready to forgive all the deceit ; yes, to forgive all ; but it was such forgiveness as contempt can easily grant, which can hardly be received by any soul not lost to honour. This Lady Davenant felt, and felt so keenly, that Helen trembled for her : she remained silent, pressing her hand upon her heart, which told her sense of approaching danger. It was averted by the calmness, the truth, the justice with which Helen spoke to Beauclerc of Cecilia. As she went on, Lady Davenant's colour returned and Beauclerc's ready sympathy went with her as far as she pleased, till she came to one point, from which he instantly started back. Helen proposed, if Beauclerc would consent, to put off their marriage till the General should be reconciled to Cecilia. 'Attempt it not, Helen,' cried Lady Davenant; 'delay not for any consideration. Your marriage must be as soon as possible, for my sake, for Cecilia's — mark me ! — for Cecilia's 474 HELEN sake, as soon as possible let it be ; it is but justice that her conscience should be so far relieved, let her no longer obstruct your union. Let me have the satisfaction of seeing it accom- plished ; name the day, Helen, I may not have many to live.' The day, the earliest possible, was named by Helen ; and the moment it was settled, Lady Davenant hurried Beauclerc away, saying — ' Return to General Clarendon — spare him sus- pense — it is all we can do for him.' The General's wishes in this, and in all that followed, were to be obeyed. He desired that the marriage should be public, that all should be bidden of rank, fashion, and note — all their family connections. Lady Katrine Hawksby he especially named. To do justice to Helen seemed the only pleasurable object now remaining to him. In speaking to Beauclerc, he never once named Lady Cecilia ; it seemed a tacit compact between him and Beauclerc that her name should not be pro- nounced. They talked of Lady Davenant ; the General said he did not think her in such danger as she seemed to consider herself to be : his opinion was, he declared, confirmed by his own observation ; by the strength of mind and of body which she had shown since her arrival in England. Beauclerc could only hope that he was right ; and the General went on to speak of the service upon which he was to be employed : said that all arrangements, laying an emphasis upon the word, would be transacted by his man of business. He spoke of what would happen after he quitted England, and left his ward a legacy of some favourite horse which he used to ride at Clarendon Park, and seemed to take it for granted that Beau- clerc and Helen would be sometimes there when he was gone. Then, having cleared his throat several times, the General desired that Lady Cecilia's portrait, which he designated only as ' the picture over the chimneypiece in my room,' should be sent after him. And taking leave of Beauclerc, he set off for Clarendon Park, where he was to remain till the day before the wedding ; — the day following he had fixed for his departure from England. When Beauclerc was repeating this conversation to Helen, Lady Davenant came into the room just as he was telling these last particulars. She marked the smile, the hope that was excited, but shook her head, and said, ' Raise no false hopes in my daughter's mind, I conjure you ' ; and she turned the 475 HELEN conversation to other subjects. Beauclerc had been to see Mr. Churchill, and of that visit Lady Davenant wished to hear. As to health, Beauclerc said that Mr. Churchill had re- covered almost perfectly ; ' but there remains, and I fear will always remain, a little lameness, not disabling, but disfiguring — an awkwardness in moving, which, to a man of his personal pretensions, is trying to the temper ; but after noticing the impediment as he advanced to meet me, he shook my hand cordially, and smiling, said, ' You see I am a marked man ; I always wished to be so, you know, so pray do not repent, my good friend.' He saw I was too much moved for jesting, then he took it more seriously, but still kindly, assuring me that I had done him real service ; it is always of service, he said, to be necessitated to take time for quiet reflection, of which he had had sufficient in his hours of solitary confinement — this little adversity had left him leisure to be good. ' And then,' continued Beauclerc, ' Churchill adverting to our foolish quarrel, to clear that off my mind, threw the whole weight of the blame at once comfortably upon the absent — on Beltravers. Churchill said we had indeed been a couple of bravely blind fools ; he ought, as he observed, to have recol- lected in time, that ' Anger is like A full hot horse, who being allowed his way, Self-mettle tires him. ' So that was good, and Horace, in perfect good humour with me and himself, and all the world, played on with the past and the future, glad he had no more of his bones to exfoliate ; glad, after so many months of failure in ' the first intention,' to find himself in a whole skin, and me safe re- turned from transportation — spoke of Helen seriously ; said that his conduct to her was the only thing that weighed upon his mind, but he hoped that his sincere penitence, and his months of suffering, would be considered as sufficient atone- ment for his having brought her name before the public ; and he finished by inviting himself to our wedding, if it were only for the pleasure of seeing what sort of a face Lady Katrine Hawksby will have upon the occasion. It was told of a cele- brated statesman, jealous of his colleagues, Horace says, that every commonly good speech cost him a twinge of the gout ; and every uncommonly good one sent him to bed with a 476 ' Von see I am a marked mati ; / always ■wished to be i HELEN regular fit. Now Horace protests that every commonly decent marriage of her acquaintance costs Lady Katrine at least a sad headache ; but Miss Stanley's marriage, likely as it is to be so happy after all, as he politely said, foredooms poor Lady Katrine to, a month's heartache at the least, and a face full ell long.' Whether in his penitence he had forsworn slander or not, it was plain that Churchill had not lost either his taste, talent, or power of sarcasm, and of this Beauclerc could have given, and in time gave, further illustrations ; but it was in a case which came home to him rather too nearly, and on which his reports did not flow quite so fluently — touching Lord Bel- travers, it was too tender a subject. Beauclerc was ashamed of himself for having been so deceived when, after all his guardian had done to save his fortune, after all that noble sacrifice had been made, he found that it was to no good end, but for the worst purpose possible. Lord Beltravers, as it was now clear, never had the slightest intention of living in that house of his ancestors on which Beauclerc had lavished his thousands, ay, and tens of thousands ; but while he was repairing, and embellishing, and furnishing Old Forest, fit for an English aristocrat of the first water, the Lord Beltravers at the gaming-table pledged it, and lost it, and sold it ; and it went to the hammer. This came out in the first fury of Lord Beltravers upon his sister's marriage at Paris : and then and there Beauclerc first came to the perception that his good friend had predestined him and his fortune for the ';Lady Blanche, whom, all the time, he considered as a fool and a puppet, and for whom he had not the slightest affection : it was all for his own interested purposes. Beauclerc suddenly opened his eyes wide, and saw it all at once ; how it had happened that they had never seen it before, notwithstanding all that the General on one side, and Lady Davenant on the other, had done to force them open, was in- comprehensible ; but, as Lady Davenant observed, 'A sort of cataract comes over the best eyes for a time, and the patient will not suffer himself to be couched ; and if you struggle to perform the operation that is to do him good against his will, it is odds but you blind him for life.' Helen could not, however, understand how Granville could have been so completely deceived, except that it had been im- 478 HELEN possible for him to imagine the exquisite meanness of that man's mind. ' There,' cried Beauclerc, ' you see my fault was having too little, instead of too much imagination.' ^ Lady Davenant smiled, and said, ' It has been» admirably observed, that " it is among men as among certain tribes of animals, it is sometimes only necessary that one of the herd should step forward and lead the way, to make all the others follow with alacrity and submission " ; i and I solve the whole difficulty thus : I suppose that Lord Beltravers, just following Beauclerc's lead, succeeded in persuading him that he was a man of genius and a noble fellow, by allowing all Beauclerc's own paradoxes, adopting all his ultra-original opinions, and, in short, sending him back the image of his own mind, till Granville had been caught by it, and had fairly fallen in love with it — a mental metaphysical Narcissus. ' After all,' continued Lady Davenant, smiling, ' of all the follies of youth, the dangerous folly of trying to do good — that for which you stand convicted — may be the most easily pardoned, the most safely left to time and experience to cure. You know, Granville, that ever since the time of Alexander the Great's great tutor, the characteristic faults of youth and age have been the " too much " and the " too little" In youth, the too much confidence in others and in themselves, the too much of enthusiasm — too much of benevolence ; — in age, alas ! too little. And with this youth, who has the too much in everything — what shall we do with him, Helen ? Take him, for better for worse, you must ; and I must love him as I have done from his childhood, a little while longer — to the end of my life.' ' A little longer, to the end of her life ! ' said Beauclerc to himself, as leaning on the back of Helen's chair he looked at Lady Davenant. ' I cannot believe that she whom I see before me is passing away, to be with us but a little longer ; so full of life as she appears ; such energy divine ! No, no, she will live, live long ! ' And as his eyes looked that hope, Helen caught it, and yet she doubted, and sighed, but still she had hope. Cecilia had none ; she was sitting behind her mother ; she looked up at Helen, and shook her head ; she had seen more of her mother's 1 Lord Mahon. 479 HELEN danger, she had been with her in nights of fearful struggle. She had been with her just after she had written to Lord Davenant what she must have felt to be a farewell letter — a letter, too, which contained the whole history of Cecilia's deception and Helen's difficulties, subjects so agitating that the writing of them had left her mother in such a state of exhaustion that Cecilia could think only with terror for her, yet she exerted all her power over herself to hide her anguish, not only for her mother's but for Helen's sake. The preparations for the wedding went on, pressed forward by Lady Davenant as urgently as the General could desire. The bridesmaids were to be Lady Emily Greville's younger sister, Lady Susan, and, at Helen's particular request, Miss Clarendon. Full of joy, wonder, and sympathy, in wedding haste Miss Clarendon and Mrs. Pennant arrived, both dehghted that it was all happily settled for Helen : which most, it was scarcely possible to say ; but which most curious as to the means by which it had been settled, it was very possible to see. When Miss Clarendon had secured a private moment with Helen, she began, ' Now tell me — tell me everything about yourself Helen could only repeat what the General had already written to his sister — that he was now convinced that the reports concerning Miss Stanley were false, his esteem restored, his public approbation to be given, Beauclerc satisfied, and her rejection honourably retracted. ' I will ask you no more, Helen, by word or look,' said Esther ; ' I understand it all, my brother and Lady Cecilia are separated for life. And now let us go to aunt Pennant : she will not annoy you by her curiosity, but how she v,\l\ be able to manage her sympathy amongst you with these crossing demands I know not ; Lady Cecilia's wretchedness will almost spoil my aunt's joy for you — it cannot be pure joy.' Pure joy ! how far from it Helen's sigh told ; and Miss Clarendon had scarcely patience enough with Lady Cecilia to look at her again ; had scarcely seconded, at least with good grace, a suggestion of Mrs. Pennant's that thgy should prevail on Lady Cecilia to take a turn in the Park with them, she looked so much in want of fresh air. ' We can go now, my dear Esther, you know, before it is time for that picture sale, at which you are to be before two 480 HELEN o'clock.' Lady Davenant desired Cecilia to go. ' Helen will be with me, do, my dear Cecilia, go.' She went, and before the awkwardness of Miss Clarendon's silence ceased, and before Mrs. Pennant had settled which glass or which l^lind was best up or down. Lady Cecilia burst into tears, thanked aunt Pennant for her sympathy, and now, above the fear of Miss Clarendon — above all fear but that of doing further wrong by concealment, she at once told the whole truth, that they might, as well as the General, do full justice to Helen, and that they might never, never blame Clarendon for the separation which was to be. That he should have mentioned nothing of her conduct even to his sister was not surprising. ' I know his generous nature,' said Cecilia. ' But I never knew yours till this moment, Cecilia,' cried Miss Clarendon, embracing her ; ' my sister, now, — separation or not.' ' But there need be no separation,' said kind aunt Pennant. Cecilia sighed, and Miss Clarendon repeated, 'You will find in me a sister at all events.' She now saw Cecilia as she really was — faults and virtues. Perhaps indeed in this moment of revulsion of feeling, in the surprise of gratified confidence, she overvalued Lady Cecilia's virtues, and was inclined to do her more than justice, in her eagerness to make generous reparation for unjust suspicion. CHAPTER XLVII After setting down Lady Cecilia at her mother's, the aunt and niece proceeded to the picture sale which Miss Clarendon was eager to attend, as she was in search of a pendant to a famous Berghem she possessed ; and while she was considering the picture, she had the advantage of hearing a story, which seemed, indeed, to be told for the amusement of the whole room, by a party of fashionables who were standing near her : — a wonderful story of a locket, which was going about ; it was variously told, but all agreed in one point — that a young married lady of high rank had never dared to appear in the 2 I 481 HELEN world since her husband had seen this locket in her hands — it had brought out something — something which had occurred before marriage ; — and here mysterious nods were interchanged. Another version stated that the story had not yet been fully explained to the husband, that he had found the locket on the table in a room that he had suddenly entered, where he dis- covered her kneeling to the person in question, — ' the person in question ' being sometimes a woman and sometimes a man. Then leaned forward, stretching her scraggy neck, one who had good reason to believe that the husband would soon speak out— the public would soon hear of a separation: and every- body must be satisfied that there could not be a separation without good grounds. Miss Clarendon inquired from a gentleman near them, who the lady was with the outstretched scraggy neck — Lady Katrine Hawksby. Miss Clarendon knew her only by reputation. She did not know Miss Clarendon either by reputation or by sight ; and she went on to say she would 'venture any wager that the separation would take place within a month. In short, there could be no doubt that before marriage,' — and she ended with a look which gave a death-blow to the reputation. Exceedingly shocked. Miss Clarendon, not only from a sense of justice to Lady Cecilia, but from feeling for her brother's honour, longed to reply in defence ; but she con- strained herself for once, and having been assured by Lady Cecilia that all had been confessed to her mother, she thought that Lady Davenant must be the best person to decide what should be done. She went to her house immediately, sent in word that she begged to see Lady Davenant for two or three minutes alone, was admitted ; Cecilia immediately vacated the chair beside her mother's bed, and left the room. Miss Clarendon felt some difficulty in beginning, but she forced her- self to repeat all she had heard. Then Lady Davenant started up in her bed, and the colour of life spread over her face — ' Thank you, thank you. Miss Clarendon ! a second time I have to thank you for an inestimable service. It is well for Cecilia that she made the whole truth known to us both — made you her friend ; now we can act for her. I will have that locket from Madame de St. CymonAefore the sun goes down.' 482 HELEN Now Lady Davenant had Madame de St. Cymon com- pletely in her power, from her acquaintance with a disgraceful transaction which had come to her knowledge at Florence. The locket was surrendered, returned with humble assurances that Madame de St. Cymon now perfectly understood the thing in its true light, and was quite convinced it had been stolen, not given. Lady Davenant glanced over her note with scorn, and was going to throw it from her into the fire, but did not. When Miss Clarendon called upon her again that evening as she had appointed, she showed it to her, and desired that she would, when her brother arrived next day, teU him what she had heard, what Lady Davenant had done, and how the locket was now in her possession. Some people who pretend to know, maintain that the passion of love is of such an all -engrossing nature that it swallows up every other feeling ; but we who judge more justly of our kind, hold differently, and rather believe that love in generous natures imparts a strengthening power, a magnetic touch, to every good feeling. Helen was incapable of being perfectly happy while her friend was miserable ; and even Beauclerc, in spite of all the suffering she had caused, could not help pitying Lady Cecilia, and he heartily wished the General could be reconciled to her ; yet it was a matter in which he could not properly interfere ; he did not attempt it. Lady Davenant determined to give a breakfast to all the bridal party after the marriage. In her state of health, Helen and Cecilia remonstrated, but Lady Davenant had resolved upon it, and at last they agreed it would be better than part- ing at the church-door — better that she should at her own house take leave of Helen and Beauclerc, who would set out immediately after the breakfast for Thorndale. And now equipages were finished, and wedding parapher- nalia sent home — the second time that wedding-dresses had been furnished for Miss Stanley ; — and never once were these looked at by the bride-elect, nor even by Cecilia, but to see that all was as it should be — that seen, she sighed, and passed on. Fehcie's ecstasies were no more to be heard : we forgot to mention that she had, before Helen's return from Llansillen, departed, dismissed in disgrace ; and happy was it for Lady Cecilia and Helen to be relieved from her jabbering, and not 483 HELEN exposed to her spying and reporting. Nevertheless, the gloom that hung over the world above could not but be observed by the world below ; it was, however, naturally accounted for by Lady Davenant's state of health, and by the anxiety which Lady Cecilia must feel for the General, who, as it had been officially announced by Mr. Cockburn, was to set out on foreign service the day after the marriage. Lady Cecilia, notwithstanding the bright hopefulness of her temper, and her habits of sanguine belief that all would end well in which she and her good fortune had any concern, seemed now, in this respect, to have changed her nature ; and ever since her husband's denunciations, had continued quite resigned to misery, and submissive to the fate which she thought she had deserved. She was much employed in at- tendance upon her mother, and thankful that she was so per- mitted to be. She never mentioned her husband's name, and if she alluded to him, or to what had been decreed by him, it was with an emotion that scarcely dared to touch the point. She spoke most of her child, and seemed to look to the care of him as her only consolation. The boy had been brought from Kensington for Lady Davenant to see, and was now at her house. Cecilia once said she thought he was very like his father, and hoped that he would at least take leave of his boy at the last. To that last hour — that hour when she was to see her husband once more, when they were to meet but to part, to meet first at the wedding ceremony, and at a break- fast in a public company, — altogether painful as it must be, yet she looked forward to it with a sort of longing ardent im- patience. ' True, it will be dreadful, yet still — still I shall see him again, see him once again, and he cannot part with his once so dear Cecilia without some word, some look, different from his last.' The evening before the day on which the wedding was to be, Lady Cecilia was in Lady Davenant's room, sitting beside the bed while her mother slept. Suddenly she was startled from her still and ever the same recurring train of melancholy thoughts by a sound which had often made her heart beat with joy — her husband's knock ; she ran to the window, opened it, and was out on the balcony in an instant. His horse was at the door, he had alighted, and was going up the steps ; she leaned over the rails of the balcony, and as she 484 HELEN leaned, a flower she wore broke off — it fell at the General's feet : he looked up, and their eyes met. There he stood, waiting on those steps, some minutes, for an answer to his inquiry how Lady Davenant was : and when the answer was brought out by Elliott, whom, as it seemed, he had desired to see, he remounted his horse, and rode away without ever again looking up to the balcony. Lady Davenant had awakened, and when Cecilia returned on hearing her voice, her mother, as the light from the half- open shutters shone upon her face, saw that she was in tears ; she kneeled down by the side of the bed, and wept bitterly ; she made her mother understand how it had been. ' Not that 1 hoped more, but still — still to feel it so ! Oh, mother, I am bitterly punished ! ' Then Lady Davenant, seizing those clasped hands, and raising herself in her bed, fixed her eyes earnestly upon Cecilia, and asked, — 'Would you, Cecilia — tell me, would you if it were now, this moment, in your power — would you retract your con- fession ? ' ' Retract ! impossible ! ' ' Do you repent — regret having made it, Cecilia ? ' ' Repent — regret having made it ! No, mother, no ! ' replied Cecilia firmly. ' I only regret that it was not sooner made. Retract ! — impossible I could wish to retract the only right thing I have done, the only thing that redeems me in my inmost soul from uttermost contempt. No ! rather would I be as I am, and lose that noble heart, than hold it as I did, un- worthily. There is, mother, as you said, as 1 feel, a sus- taining, a redeeming power in truth.' Her mother threw her arms round her. ' Come to my heart, my child, close — close to my heart. Heaven bless you ! You have my blessing — my thanks, CeciUa. Yes, my thanks, — for now I know — I feel, my dear daughter, that my neglect of you in childhood has been repaired. You make me forgive myself, you make me happy, you have my thanks — my blessing — my warmest blessing ! ' A smile of delight was on her pale face, and tears ran down as Cecilia answered — 'Oh, mother, mother! blind that I have been. Why did not I sooner know this tenderness of your heart ? ' 485 HELEN ' And why, my child, did I not sooner know you ? The fauh was mine, the suffering has been yours, — not yours alone, though.' ' Suffer no more for me, mother, for now, after this, come what may, I can bear it. I can be happy, even if ' There she paused, and then eagerly looking into her mother's eyes she asked, — ' What do you say, mother, about him ? do you think I may hope ? ' ' I dare not bid you hope,' replied her mother. ' Do you bid me despair ? ' ' No, despair in this world is only for those who have lost their own esteem, who have no confidence in themselves, for those who cannot repent, reform, and trust. My child, you must not despair. Now leave me to myself,' continued she ; ' open a little more of the shutter, and put that book within my reach.' As soon as Miss Clarendon heard that her brother had arrived in town she hastened to him, and, as Lady Davenant had desired, told him of all the reports that were in circulation, and of all that Lady Cecilia had spontaneously confided to her. Esther watched his countenance as she spoke, and observed that he listened with eager attention to the proofs of exactness in Cecilia ; but he said nothing, and whatever his feelings were, his determination, she could not doubt, was still unshaken ; even she did not dare to press his confidence. Miss Clarendon reported to Lady Davenant that she had obeyed her command, and she described as nearly as she could all that she thought her brother's countenance expressed. Lady Davenant seemed satisfied, and this night she slept, as she told Cecilia in the morning, better than she had done since she returned to England. And this was the day of trial The hour came, and Lady Davenant was in the church with her daughter. This marriage was to be, as described in olden times, ' celebrated with all the lustre and pomp imagin- able ' ; and so it was, for Helen's sake, Helen, the pale bride ' Beautiful ! ' the whispers ran as she appeared, ' but too pale.' Leaning on General Clarendon's arm she was led up the aisle to the altar. He felt the tremor of her arm on his, but she looked composed and almost firm. She saw no one 486 HELEN individual of the assembled numbers, not even Cecilia or Lady Davenant. She knelt at the altar beside him to whom she was to give her faith, and General Clarendon, in the face of all the world, proudly gave her to his ward, and she, without fear, low and distinctly pronounced the sacred vow. And as Helen rose from her knees, the sun shone out, and a ray of light was on her face, and it was lovely. Every heart said so — every heart but Lady Katrine Hawksby's — And why do we think of her at such a moment ? and why does Lady Davenant think of her at such a moment ? Yet she did ; she looked to see if she were present, and she bade her to the breakfast. And now all the salutations were given and received, and all the murmur of congratulations rising, the living tide poured out of the church ; and then the noise of carriages, and all drove off to Lady Davenant's ; and Lady Davenant had gone through it all so far, well. And Lady Cecilia knew that it had been ; and her eyes had been upon her husband, and her heart had been full of another day when she had knelt beside him at the altar. And did he, too, think of that day ? She could not tell, his countenance discovered no emotion, his eyes never once turned to the place where she stood. And she was now to see him for one hour, but one hour longer, and at a public breakfast ! but still she was to see him. And now they are all at breakfast. The attention of some was upon the bride and bridegroom ; of others, on Lady Cecilia and on the General ; of others, on Lady Davenant ; and of many, on themselves. Lady Davenant had Beauclerc on one side. General Clarendon on the other, and her daughter opposite to him. Lady Katrine was there, with her "■ tristeful visage,' as Churchill justly called it, and more tristeful it presently became. When breakfast was over, seizing her moment when con- versation flagged, and when there was a pause, implying ' What is to be said or done next ? ' Lady Davenant rose from her seat with an air of preparation, and somewhat of solemnity. All eyes were instantly upon her. She drew out a locket, which she held up to public view ; then, turning to Lady Katrine Hawksby, she said — 'This bauble has been much talked of, I understand, by your ladyship, but I question whether you have ever yet seen it, or know the truth concern- 487 HELEN ing it. This locket was stolen by a worthless man, given by him to a worthless woman, from whom I have obtained it ; and now I give it to the person for whom it was originally destined.' She advanced towards Helen and put it round her neck. This done, her colour flitted — her hand was suddenly pressed to her heart; yet she commanded — absolutely commanded, the paroxysm of pain. The General was at her side ; her daughter, Helen, and Beauclerc, were close to her instantly. She was just able to walk ; she slowly left the room — and was no more seen by the world ! She suffered herself to be carried up the steps into her own apartment by the General, who laid her on the sofa in her dressing-room. She looked round on them, and saw that all were there whom she loved ; but there was an alteration in her appearance which struck them all, and most the General, who had least expected it. She held out her hand to him, and fixing her eyes upon him with deathful expression, calmly smiled, and said — ' You would not believe this could be ; but now you see it must be, and soon. We have no time to lose,' continued she, and moving very cautiously and feebly, she half-raised herself — ' Yes,' said she, ' a moment is granted to me, thank Heaven ! ' She rose with sudden fwwer and threvi' herself on her knees at the General's feet : it was done before he could stop her. ' For God's sake ! ' cried he, ' Lady Davenant ! — I conjure you- She would not be raised. ' No,' said she, ' here I die if I appeal to you in vain — to your justice. General Clarendon, to which, as far as I know, none ever appealed in vain — and shall I be the first ? — a mother for her child — a dying mother for your wife — for my dear Cecilia, once dear to you.' His face was instantly covered with his hands. 'Not to your love,' continued she — 'if that be gone — to your justice 1 appeal, and MUST be heard, if you are what I think you : if you are not, why, go — go, instantly — go, and leave your wife, innocent as she is, to be deemed guilty — Part from her, at the moment when the only fault she committed has been repaired — Throw her from you when, by the sacrifice of all that was dear to her, she has proved her truth — Yes, you know that she has spoken the whole, the perfect truth ' She joined their hands. HELEN ' I know it,' exclaimed he. ' Give her up to the whole world of slanderers ! — destroy her character ! If now her husband separate from her, her good name is lost for ever ! If now her husband protect her not ' Her husband turned, and clasped her in his arms. Lady Davenant rose and blessed him — blessed them both : they knelt beside her, and she joined their hands. 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LUBBOCK (Sir John).— The Origin and Metamorphoses of Insects Illustrated. Or. 8vo. -^s. td. MEYRICK (E.). — Handbook of British Lepidoptera. Ex- cr. 8vo. lof . 6d. net. MIALL (L. C.).— Natural History or Aquatic Insects. Cr, 8vo. ts. SCUDDER (S. H.).— Fossil Insects of North America. Map and Plates. * vols. 4to. gos. net. OnUthology, COUES (Elliott).— Key to North Ambricak Birds. Illustrated. 8vo. 2/. 2^. Handbook of Field and General Or- nithology. Illustrated. 8vo. lai. net. F0WLER(W. W.). (.SwNatural History.) HEADLEY (F. W.).— Structure and Life OF Birds. Cr. 8vo. yj. td. WHITE (Gilbert). {Stt Natdral History.) WRIGHT(M. O.). (^^^ Natural History.) INDEX. PAGE Abrahams (I.). . . 42 Abbev(£. A,j . . 15,47 Abbot (F. E.) . . . 42 Abbott (E. A.) 6, 17, 38, 39, 42 Acton (Lord) . . .11 Adams (Sir F. O.) . . 36 Addison . . 4, 24, 25 JEsop. ... 14, 48 Agassiz (L.) ... 4 AiNGER (Rev. A.) 5, 20, 27, 42 Ainslie(A. D.). . . i^ Airy (Sir G. B.) . 3, 34 AiTKEN (Mary C.) . . 25 AiTKEN (Sir W.) , . 30 Albemarle (Earl of) . 4 Aldous (J. C. P.) . 40, 41 Aldrich{T.B.) . . 17 Alexander (C. F.) . 17, 25 Alexander (T.) . 10 Alexander (Bishop) . 4^ Allbutt(T.C.) . . 28 Allen (G.) ... 7 Allingham (W.) . , 25 Amiel(H.F.) ... 4 Anderson (A.^ . , * ^7 Anderson (L.). . . 2 Anderson (Dr. McCall) . 28 Andrews (C. M,) . . n Andrews (Dr. Thomas) . 33 Appleton (T. G.) . . 4"- Archer-Hind (R.D.) . 4*^ Arnold(M.)9, 17,24,25,38,39 Arnold (Dr. T. ) . .11 Arnold (W.T.) , .11 Ashley (W. J.). , 4, 35 Atkinson ((>. F.) • • 7 Atkinson ij. B.l on (Rev. J. C. Atkinson {kev. J. C.) 2, 4S Attwell (H.) . . .25 Austen (Jane) . , . 21 Austin (Alfred) 10, 17, 24 AUTENRIETH (GcOtg) . O Awdry(F.) ... 48 Bacon (Francis) . 4. 24, 2"; Badenoch (L. N.) . 30, 50 Bailey (L. H.) , . 10 Baines (Rev. K.) . . 4a Baker (Sir S.W.)4, 36, 37.47.48 Balch (Elizabetl ) . .14 Baldwin (Prof. J. M.) , 33 Balfour (F. M.) . . 7 Balfour (J. B.) . .7 Ball (J.) . . .47 Ball (W, Piatt) . . 7 Ball 14 , 21, 4B 43 • A3 • 15 . 36 . . =0 • A, 16, 24 • 29 .18, 24, 25 PAGE Crosslev (E.) ... 3 Crosslev (H.) . , .46 Gumming (L.) . • • 33 Cunliffe (J. W.) , . 24 Cunningham (C.) . • 36 Cunningham (Sir H, S.) Cunningham (Rev. J.) . 40 CUNNINGHAM(ReV.W)40,4I,,3 CUNVNGHAME (Sir A. T.) CTiRTEis(Rev. G. H.) . CURTIN (J.) D'Arcy(C. F.). Dabbs(G. H. R.) . Dahlstrom (K. p.). Dahn (F.) Dakvns(H. G.) , . 46 Dale(A.W.W.) . . 40 DALTON(Rev. J.N.) Daniell (Alfred), . - 33 Dante . . .4, 17, 46 Dasent (a. I.). Davidson (Bishop) . 41, 43 Davies (Rev. J. Ll.X 4 43 Davies(W.^ . . (.,4 J Davis (R. H.) . . -^i Dawkins(W.B.) . I Dawson (G. M.) . . 11 Dawson (Sir J. W.) . . 11 Dawson (W. J.) . . 18 Day (L. B.) . , . 21 Dav(R.E.) ... 33 Dean (A.). , . .10 Dean (B.). . . .49 Defoe (D.) . . 5, 15 Degerdon (W. E.) . . 38 Deighton (K.). Si iQi 24, 37 Delamotte (P. H.). . 3 Delbos (L.) . . .31 Dell(E. C.) ... 14 De Morgan (M.) . 48 Deussen(P.) . . . 32 De Quatrffages (A.) . i De Rousiers (P.) . . 35 De Varigny(H.) 7 De Vere(A.) . . 18, 24 D'ISRAELI (B.). . . 22 Dicey (A. V.) , . 15, 36 Dickens (C.) . . 21, 24 DiLKENS (M. A.) , 22, 24 DlGGLE(Rev.J. W.). . 43 Dilke (Ashton W.) . . 24 DiLKE (Sir Charles W.) 30, 36 Dillwvn (E. a.) . . 22 Dobbin (L.) ... 8 DoBSON (A.) . , 5. 14 Donaldson (J.) . . 41 DONISTHORPE (W.) . . 36 Dorr (J. C. R.) . . 47 Douglas (Theo.) . . 22 DowDEN (E.) 5, 17, 19, 26 Doyle f Sir F. H.) . . 18 Dovle h. A.) . . .12 Drage(G.) . . .37 Drake (B.) . . .46 DRUMMOND(Prof. J.) . 43 Dryden . . . . S5 Du Cane(E. F.) . . ^6 DuFF(Sir M. E. G.) 6, 25, 36, 47 Duncan (S. J.). . . 22 DuNSMUIR (a.). . .22 DOntzer (H.) . . . 5, 6 DuRAND (Sir M.) . , 22 Dver(L.). . . 2, 35 Dver(H.J. ... 37 Eadie(J.). . . 4, 38, 40 Earl (A.) . Eastlake (Lady) . Ebers(G.) ECCLES (A. S.) . Edgeworth (Prof. F. Y.). Edgeworth (M.) , Edmunds (Dr. W.) PAGB . 33 29 35 28 EDWARDs-Moss(Sir J. E.) 38 Ehlers (E. S.). . . 29 EiMER(G. H. T.) . , 7 Elderton (W. A.) . II Ellerton (Rev. J.), . 43 Elliott (Hon. A.) . . 36 Ellis (A.). . . 20, 25 Ellis (T.). • . 3 Emerson (R. W.) . 4, 25 Emerson (O. F.) . . 31 Erman (A.) ... a Evans (Lady) . . a Evans (S.) ... 18 Everett (J. D.) . . 33 Falconer (Lance) . . 22 Farrar (Archd.) 6, 39, 43 t-'ARRER (SirT. H.) . 36 Fasnacht (G. E.) . . 25 Faulkner (F.). . . 8 Fawcett (Prof. H.) . 35, 37 Fawcett (Mrs. H.) . 6, 35, 77 Fay (Amy) . . 30 Fayrer (Sir J.). . , 14 Fearnley (W.) . , 34 Fearon (D. R.) , . 10 Ferrel (W.) . . .34 Fessenden (C.) . . 33 Field (Mrs. E. M.). . 22 Field (Rev. T.) . . 12 FlELDE (A M.). . . 14 Finck(H.T.) . . 1 Fisher (Rev. O.) . . 33 FisKE(J.). 7, 12, 32, 37, 43 Fison(L.). ... 1 Fitch U-G.) ... 10 FiTZ Gerald (Caroline) . 18 Fitzgerald (Edward) 18, 25 Fitzmaurice (Lord E ) 6 Flagg(A. T.) . Fleischer (E ). Fleming (G.) . Florv(M. A.) , Flower (Sir W.H.). FlOckiger(F.A.) . 31 S 23 3 49 29 35 . 47 43 47 Fonda (A. J.) Forbes (A.) . . 4 Forbes (Rev. G.) . Forbes-Mitchell (W.) 5, FoRTESCUE (Hon. J. W.).4,3o Foster (Prof. M.) . 7,34,3s Foster-Melliar(A.) . 10 FOTHEEGILL {Ut. J. M.) 9, 2g FowLE (Rev. T. ^ Fowler (Rev. T.) Fowler (W.W.) .a, Fox(T. W.) . Fox (Dr. Wilson) Foxell (W. J.) FoxwELL (Prof. H. S) Framji (D.) , Francis (F.) . Frankland (P. F.) . Franklin (W. S.) . Eraser (Mrs ) . Fraser (Bishop) Fraser-Tytler (C. C.) Frazer (J. G.) . French (G. R.) 36,43 5i 3a 25. 30 38 39 36 33 48 43 x8 z 17 INDEX. 53 PAGE Trbeman (Prof. E. A.) , =1 Si 12, 37. 40 Friedmann (p.) . , 4 -Froissart . . .25 Frost (A. B.) ... 48 FroudeQ. A.), . . 4 FULLERTON (W. M.) . 47 FURNIVALL (F.J.) . . 18 Fwfe(C. A.) . . .12 Fvfe(H. H.) . . .1, Oaironer (J.) ... 5 'Gaisford (H.) . , .10 •GaLT (J.) . . . .23 Galton (F.) ... 1 Gamgke (Arthur) . . 33 'Gardner (E.) . . . z Gardner (Percy) . . 2 Garnett (R.) . . 18 -Garnett^W.) , . . 5 ■Gaskell (Mrb.) . . 14 Gaskoin (Mrs. H.) . . 38 Geddes(W. D.) . 17, <6 •Gee(H.) .... 40 Gee(W.W.H.) . 33 34 GB;iKiE(SirA.). 4,5,6,11,34 Gennadius (T.) , 21 Gendng (J. r.) . . 17 -George (H. B.) . . so Gibbins(H. de B.) . .12 Gibbon (CHarlfs) . . 4 ■GiDDING (F. H.) . . 37 Gillies (H. C.) . . 29 Gilchrist (A.). , . 4 Giles (P.). ... 31 -Oilman (N. P.) . 35 37 GiLMOKt (Rev. J.) . . 16 Gladstone (Dr. J. H.) 8, 10 Gladstone (W. E.) . . 17 Glaister (E.) . . . 2, 9 •Glover (E.) . . . 43 Godfrav (H.) ... 3 Godkin(G. S.). . . 6 Goethe . 5, 14, x8, 25 "Goldie(T.) ... 37 Goldsmith 5. 14, 18, 25, 26 ■Gonner(E. C. K.) . . II GOODFELLOW (J.) . . 14 G00DN0W(F. J.) . . I! Gordon (General C. G.) . 5 Gordon (Lady Duff) . 47 •Gordon (H.) . . .33 GosLHEN (Rt. Hon. G. J.). 35 OossE (Edmund) . 5, 16 Gow(J.) .... 2 ■Gow(W.) ... 31 Gracian (Balthasat) . 25 Graham (D.) . . .18 Graham (J. W.) . . 22 Grand'homme (E.) . . 9 ■Grane (W. L.). . . 43 47t4^ Kingsley(G.) . . - 38 Kingslev (Henry) 25, 47 Kipling (J. L.). . . 47 Kipling tRudyard) .23, 27, 32, 36 ■ 37 . II • 35 I 13 KlRKPATRlCK {ftof.) 38, 41 Klein (Dr. E.). . 7, 29. S'^ Klein (F.) 26 Knight (W.) . 17, 28, 32 KUENEN (Prof. A.) . 38 Kvnaston (Rev. H.) 43j 46 Labberton (R. H.) . 3 La Faroe (J.) . 3 Lafargue (P.). 23 Lamb. . . .5 26 27 Lanciani (Prof. R.) . 2 Landauer (J.). 8 Landor . 5. !6 Lane-Poole (S.) . 6. i6 Lanfrev(P.) . 6 Lang (Andrew) 15, 26, 46 Lang (Prof. Arnold) . 49 Langlev (J. N.) 34 Langmaid (T.). 10 Lankester (Prof. Ray) 7. 27 LaSSAr-Cohn (Dr.). 8 Laslett (T.) . , 7 Laughton (J. K.) . , 4 Laurie (A. P.). , 1.3 Lawrence (T. J.) . , 15 Lawton (W. C.) . 27 Lea(A. S.) 3'' Leaf (W.) 17 46 Leahv (Sergeant) . 38 LEEfM.) . 23 Lee(S.) . . . 25 .6 Lees (C. H.) . 3 ■■ Lee- Warner (W.) . 13 Leeper (A.) Legge (.A. 0.) . . f> 13 '3 Leibnitz . 36 Leslie (G. D.) . 27 Lethaby (W. R.) . 2 38 Lethbrid^.e (iir Roper) 5 >3 Lew (Amy) 23 Lewi (R.) 16 Lewkowitsch (J.) . 38 LiGHTFOOT (l.ishop) 5, 13, i., 40, 41 i43 i44 LiGHTWOOD (J. M.) . IS Lindsay (Dr. J. A.). 29 LiTTLEDALE (H.) . 17 Lockyer(.I N) 3,6 34 38 LODEMAN (E. G.) . ID Lodge (Prof. O.J.) 3 27 34 Lodge (R.) 5 Lowenson-Lkssing (F.) . 11 LOEWY (B.) 33 L0FTiE(Mrs.W.J.). 2 Longfellow (H. W.) 26 Lonsdale (J.) . 25 46 Lover (S.). 23 Lowe (W. H.) . S" 39 Lowell (J. R.). 15 18 27 Loudon (W. J.) Louis (H.) LuJBOCK(Sir J.)7, 10, II,; Lucas (F.) Lucas (Joseph). Lunt(J.). Lupton (S.) LvALL (Sir Alfred) • Lyde (L. \V.) . Lysaght(S. R.) Lyte(H.C. M.) Lvttelton (A. T.) . LVTTELTON (E.) . Lytton (Earl of) . MacAlister (D.) . Macarthur (M.) . Macaulay (G. C.) .2( Macaulay (Lord) , Maccoll (Norman) . McCurdyO- F-) . M'CosH (Dr. J.) Macdonald (George) Macdonald (G.) MackailU- W.) . MacKnight(J.) Maclagan (Dr.T.). Maclaren (Rev. Alex.) Maclaren (Archibald) Maclean (G. E.) . Maclean (W.C.J . Maclear (Rev. Dr.) 38, McLennan (J. C.) . M'Lennan (J. K) M'Lennan (Malcolm) MACMILLAN(RtV. H.) Macmillan (Michael) Macmillan (M. K.) Macquoid (K. S.) . Madoc (F.) Maguire(T.F.) MAHAFFT(Prof. ;. P.) 2, 13, 16, J', 32, Maitland (F. W.J - Malet (L.) Malory (Sir T.) Malthus(T. R.) . Mansfield(C.B.) . ^L\RCOU (J.) I.VKKHAM (C. R.) . Marr(J. E.) . M,^KIilOTT(r. A. R.). Marrvat (Capt.) Marshall (Prot. A ) Marshall (H. K.) . Martel (C.) . Martin (Frances) . Martin (Frederick). Martin (H.N.) Martineau (C. a ). Martineau (H.) Martineau (Dr. J.) Mason (A. E. W.) , Mason (O. T.). Masson(D.) s, 18, 21 Masson (G.) . Masson (R. O.) Mathew(E. J.) Maturin (Rev. W.), Maudsley (Dr. H.) . Maurice (F. D.) 10, 27, 32, 18-40. Maurice (Gen.F.) 5. Max MOller (F.) . Mayer (A.M.). Mayo-Smith (R.) . fagb . 33 . 38 27, . f'.nristie) Murray (G.) . Myers (L.j Myers (I' . W H.) . Mylne (Bishop) Nadal(K. S.) . NERNST(Dr. ) . Nettleship (H.). . Newcomb (S.) . Newcastle (Duke ai Duchess) Newman (G.) . Newton (Sir C. T.). NiCHOL (J.) Nichols (E. L.) NlCHOLLS (H. A. A.) Nisbet(J.) Noel (Lady A.) Nordenskiold (.\. E. 1 NoRGATE (Kate) NOEKIS (W. E.) Norton (Charles EHot) Norton (Hon. Mrs.) Norway (A. H.) Oliphant (T. L. K.) 5 4>25 25. 31 46 18 38. i3 I S 8. 13 3S 15 33.44- 23 3 18,46 Si 19. 27 4+ 27 i iS 3 26- 29. 2 4 33 ■ 23. • 47 • 13 . 21 4, 46 19. 23 • 31 27,31s PAGE OupHANT(Mrs.M. O. W.) 5, I3i i6i 23, 25, 49 Olivke (Prof. D.) . » Oliver (Capt. S. P.). Oman (C. W.) . Orr (H, B.) . OSBOEN (H. F.) OsTwALD (Prof.) Ott* (E. C.) . Page (T. E.) . Palgravb (SirF.) Palgrave(F.T.) 3. 19, 21, as, 26, 42, Palgrave (R. H. Inglis) Palgrave (W. G.) 19, 37 Palmer (Lady S.) Parker (T.T.). Parker (W. K.) Parker (W. N.) Parkes (Sir H.) Parkin (G. R. ) Parkinson (S.) Pakkman (F.) . Parry (G.) Parsons (Alfred) Pasteur (L.) . Pater (W.) . Paterson (A.) . Paterson (A. B.) Paterson (J.) . Patmore (Coventry) Patteson (J. C.) Pattison (Mark) Paulsen (F.) . Payne (E.J.) . Peabody (C. H.) Peacock (T. L.) Pearson (C. H.) Pease (A. E.) . Peel (E.) . Peile(J.). Pellissibr (E.) Pennell(J.) . Pennington (R.) Penrose (F.C.) Percival (H. M.) . 18, 19 Perkins (J. B.) . . 13 Peterson (W.) . . '^ Pettigrew (J. B.) . 8, 35 Phillimore (J. G.) Phillips (F. E.) Phillips (J. A.) Phillips (W. C.) . . 3 PicTON (J. A.) . . .27 PiFFARD (H. G.) . . 29 Pike (L. O.) . . . 13 Pike (W.). ... 47 Playfair (W. S.) . . 28 Plato ... 26, 46 Plumptre (Dean) . . 44 Pollard (A. W.) . 16, 17, 46 Pollock (Sir F., Bart.) 6, 16, 27, 36, 37 Pollock (Lady) . . 2 Poole (M. E.) . . . 27 Poole (R.L.) . . .13 Pope , . . . Si 25, 27 PosTE (E.) . . 34, 46 Potter (L.) . • .27 Potter (R.) , . .44 Potts (W.) ... 28 Preston (T.) ... 34 Prestwich (J.). . .11 Price (E. C.) . . . 23 Prick (L.L.F.R.) . .36 13 39 13 49 35 47 23 49 6 49 t 37 34 13,47 23 IS 13 x6, 23, 27 23 19 16 !5i 49 6 6, 44 10 i, 36 iOi 34 23 37 14 19 31 32 3 INDEX. Prickard (A. O.) . Prince Albert Victor Prince George Procter (F.) . Propert (I. L.) Prowse (D. W.) Purcell (E. S.) Quesnay (F.) . Rabbeno (U.) . Rae(J.) . . Ramsay (Sir A. C.) Ramsay (W.) . Ransome(C.) . Rathbone (W.) Ratzel (F.) . Rawlinson (W. G.). Rawnsley (H. D.) Ray (P. K.) . Rayleigh (Lord) Reichel (Bishop) Reid (J. S.) . Remsen (I.) . Renan (E.) . Rendall (Rev. F.) Reynolds (E. S.) Reynolds (H. R.) Reynolds (Sir J. R. Reynolds fO.) Rhoades (J.) . Rhodes (J. F.). Ricardo . Richardson (B. W. Rickey (A. G.). Righton (E.) . Ritchie (A.) , Roeb(R.). Robinson (Preb. H Robinson (J. L.) Robinson (Matthew) Rockstro (W. S.) Rogers (J. E. T.) Romanes (G.J.) RoscoE (Sir H. E.) Roscoe(W. C.) Rosebery (Earl of) Rosenbusch (H.) Rosevear (E.). Ross (P.) . Rossetti (C. G.) Rothschild (F.) Routledge (J.) Rowe(F.J.) . Roy (Neil) ROCKER (Prof. A. W, Rumford (Count) Rushbrooke (W. G Russell (Dean) Russell (Sir Charles) Russell (W. Clark) Russell (T.) . Rutherford (W. RvlandIF.) . RYLE(Prof. H. E.) Sadler (H.) Saintsbury (G.) Salmon (Rev. G.) Salt (H. S.) ^ . Sandford (Bishop) Sandford (M. E.) Sandys (J.E.). Sayce(A.H.) . Scaife(W. B.). SCARTAZZINI (G. a. ScHi lEMANN (Dr.) Schmoller (G.) ss g.) page . 28 . 46 . 46 . 41 • 3 • 13 . s . 36 . 36 6,36 . 6 . S . 17 . 9 . I • 15 . 19 ■ 32 . 34 • 4^ 40, 44 - 14 . 44 ■ 29 . 14 . 23 • 13 35i 36 14, 29 . 16 .G.) 44 31 . . 6 . 5 I3i 37 . 7 .8,9 . 19 . 5 II . 9 . 23 I9i 49 . 13 . 37 . 20 . 23 . 9 . 38 • 39 . 44 • 37 4> 23 • 3« 38,46 . 16 38,44 3 S, 16 : JJ : 'I • 47 . 13 . 28 . 17 . 2 ■ 35 fagx Schorlbmmbr (C.) . .8,0 Schreiber(T.). 2 SCHUCHHABDT (C.) . 3 ScHULTz(Dr. G.) . . 9 Schuster (A.). • 33 SCOTT(M.) . . ■ 23 Scott (Sir W.^. . 19, 25 SCRATCHLEV (Sir Peter) . 30 SCUDDER (S. H.) . . SO SEATON(Pr. E.G.) . . 39 Seebohm (H. E.) . . I Seeley (Sir J. R.) .13.37)44 Seiler (Dr. Carl) . 29, 35 SELBORNE[Earlof)5i 25, 40, 42 Seligman (E.) . . .36 Sellers (E.) • • ■ 2 Service (J.) . . 41, 44 Sewell{E. M.) . . 13 Shadwell (C. L.) . . 46 Shairp (J. CO . ■ 4. 19 Shakespeare . 17, 191.25, s6 Shann (G.) . . 10, 34 Sharp (W.) ... 6 Shaw (Miss) . . •14 Sheldon (W. L.) . . 32 Shelley ... 19, 26 Shipton (Helen) . . 23 Shirley (W.N.) . . 44 Shore (L. E.) . . . 34 Shorthousb (J. H.) 23, 24 Shortland (Admiral) . 31 Shuckburgh (E. S.) 14, 46 Shufeldt (R. W.) . . 49 SiBSON (Dr. F.) . . 29 Sidgwick(A.) . . .20 SiDGWicK (Prof. H.) 32, 36, 37 SiME (J.) . . .II, 12 Simpson (Rev. W.) . . 40 Skeat (W.W.) . . 17 Skrine (J. H.). , 6, 19 Slade ( j. H.) . . , 10 Sleeman (L.) . . .47 Sloman (Rev. A.) . . 39 Smart (W.) ... 36 Smallev (G. W.) . 6,28 Smetham (J. and S.) . 6 Smith (Adam) . 3, 6, 35, 36 Smith (Alexander) . 17, 25 Smith (C. B.) ... 19 Smith (F. Hopkinson) . 24 Smith (Garnet). . . 34 Smith (Goldwin) 4, 6, 14, 21, 28, 37, 45) 47 Smith (H.) . . .19 Smith (J.) ... 8 Smith (Rev. T.) . . 44 Smith (W. G.) . . .8 Smith (L. Pearsall) . . 24 Sohm (R.). . . .40 Somerville (Prof. W.) . 7 Soothey . . . 6, 26 Spanton (J.) ... 3 Spender Q. K.) . . 29 Spenser ... 19, 25 Spottiswoode(W.). , 34 St. Asaph (Bishop of) . 40 St, Johnston (A.) .23, 47, 49 Stanley (Dean) . . 44 Stanley (Hon. Maude) , 37 Statham (R.) ... 37 STEBBINGtW.). . . 4 Steel (F. A.) . * i5) 24 Stephen (C. E.) . .9 Stephen (H.) . . .16 Stephen (Sir J. F.) 14, 16, 28 S6 INDEX. PAGE 6 5 19 5 16 6 Stephen (J. K.) Stephen (L.) Stephens ( I. B.) Stephens (W R. W.) Stevens (C. E.) Stevenson (F. S.) , Stevenson 0' J'> • Stewart (A.) . Stewart (Bal(our) 33, 34, Stokes (Sir G. G.) . Story (R. H. ) . Stone (W.H.). Strachey (Sir E.) . Strachey(J. St. L.) Strachey (Gen. R.) . Strangford( Viscountess) Strettell (A.) Stubbs (Dean) . Stubbs (Bishop) Sutherland (A.) . Swainson (H.). Swete (Prof. H. B.). Swift (Dean) . Symonds (J. A.) SvMONDS (Mrs. J. A.) Svmons (A.) Taggart (W. S.) . Tainsh(E.C.). Tait (Archbishop) Tait (C. W. a.) Tait (Prof. P. G.) Tanner (H.) . Tarr(R. S.) . Tavernier (J. B.) . Taylor (E. R.). Taylor (Kraniclin) Taylor (Isaac). Taylor (Sedley) Tegetmeier (W. B.) Temple (Bishop) Temple (Sir R.) Tennant (Dorothy). Tenniel (Sir John) . Tennyson (Lord) 17, 19 Tennyson (Fredenclc) Tennyson (Lord H.) Theodoli (Marchesa) Thompson (D 'A. %/.) Thompson (E.). Thompson (H. M.) . Thompson (S. P.) Thomson (A. W.) . Thomson (Sir C. W.) Thomson (Hugh) Thoreau . Thorne (Dr. Thome) Thornton (J.). Thornton (W. T.) 32, Thorpe (T. E.). Thring (E.) . Thrupp 0- F.) • Thursfikld (J. R.) . Todhunter (I.) TORRENS (W. M.) . Tourg^niep (L S.) . Tout(T.F.) . Tozer(H. F.) . . . __ Traill (H. D.). . 4, 5, 36 39 15 5 6 IJ 38 17 45 14 33. 34, 45 34 47 3 30 32. 45 3°. 34 9 43 4 48 48 ,26 Si 49 24 56 34 10 50 14 28 29 7 37. 46 6,9 10, 28 33 5 6 5 24 14 PAGE Trench (Capt. F.) . . 37 Trench (Archbishop) . 45 Tkkvelvan (Sir G. O.) 14,28 Trevor (G.H.) . . so I'RIBE (A.). ... 8 Tristram (W. O.) . . 15 Trollope (A.) . . . s Truman (J.) . . .20 Tucker (T.G.) . . 46 TUCKWELL (W.) . , 14 Tufts 0- H.) . . . 32 TuLLOCH (Prmcipal). 45 Turner fC. Tennysoli) . ao Turner (G.) . . 1 Turner (H.H.) . . 34 Turner (J. M. W.) . . 15 Turpin(G S.). .9 Tylor (E. B.) . .1 Tvrwhitt (R. St. J.) 3, 20 Tyrrell (R.Y.) 16, 28 Vaughan(C. J.) 39, 40, 41, 45 Vaughan (Rev. D.J.J 26,28,45 VAUGHAN(Rev. E. X.) . 45 Vaughan (Rev. R.). . 45 Velev (M.) . . .24 Venn (Rev. J.). . 33,45 Vernon (Hon. W. W.) . 17 Verrall (A. W.) . 17, 46 Verrall (Mrs.) , . 2 ViCKERMAN (C.) . . 38 Victor (H.) . . .24 Vines (S. H.) . . .8 Viollet-Le-Duc (E. E.). 10 Wain (Louis) . . .48 Waldstein (C.) . . 2 WAiKEE(Prof. F. A.) . 36 Walker (Jas.) . 8 Walker (Louisa) . 38 Wallace (A. R.) .7, 30, 36 Wallace (Sir D. M.) . 37 Walpole(S.) ... 36 Walton (1.) , -. .15 Ward (A. W.) . 4, 5, 16, 2S Ward (H. M.) . . . 7, 8 Ward(S.). ... 20 Wakd(T. H.) ... 21 WARD(Mrs. T. H.) . 24,49 Ward (W.) . . 6, 2!, 41 Ware (W. R.) . . .3 Waters (C. A.) . . 35 Waterton (Ciiarles) 30, 47 Watson (E.) ... 6 Watson (R. S.) . .47 Watson (W.) . . 20, 25 Way (A. S.) . . . 46 Webb (W. T.) . . 18, 20 Webster (Mrs. A.) . 20, 49 Weisbach (J.) . . 10 Welby-Gregory (Lady) . 41 Welldon (Rev. J. E. C.) 45,46 West (M.) . . .24 Westcott (Bp.) 38,39,40,41,45 Westermarck (E.). . 1 Wetherell (J.) . . 3a Wheeler (J. T.) . . 14 Whewell(W.). . . 6 Whitcomb (L. S.) . 3,16 White (A.) ... 28 PAGK IS, 3' White (Gilbert) White (Dr. W. Hale) White (W.) ... 34 Whitney (W. D.) , .9 Whittier (J. G.) 20, s6, 28 Whittuck (C. A.) . . 45 WiCKHAM (Rev. E. C.) .- 45. WiCKSTEED (P. H.) . 36, ,8 Wiedersheim (R.) . 35, 49. WiESER (F. von) . . 36- Wilbraham (F. M.). . 41 Wilkins (Prof. A. S.) 2,16,45 Wilkinson (S.) . . 3c- Willey (a.) ... 7 Williams (C. M.) . . 327 WiLLiAi»s(C. T.) . . 29 Williams (G. H.) . . 11. Williams (H.). . 14, 311 Williams (Montagu) 6 Williams (S. E.) . 16 Williamson (M. B.) . 45. Willink (A.) . . .45 Willoughby (E. F.) . i<„ Willoughby (F.) . . 49* Willoughby (W. W.) . 36 Wills (W. G.) . . . 20. Wilson (A. J.) . . . 36 Wilson (Sir C.) . . 4_ Wilson (Sir D.) . i, 4, 17 Wilson (E. B.). . . 50 Wilson (Dr. G.) . 5, 6, 2* Wilson (Archdeacon) . 45 Wilson (Mary). . . i6' Winch (R. F.) . . 27 Winchester (Bishop oQ. fr Windelband (W.) . . 32 WiNGATE (Major F. R.) . 30 Winkworth (C.) . . 6- WiNKWORTH (S.) • . 25 Winter (W.) . . .15 WoLSELEY(Gen.Viscotmt) 3a Wood (A. G.) Wood (C. J.) WoODfRev. E. G.) . • 45 14.45 Woods (Rev. F. : Woods (Miss M. A.). Woodward (C. M.) . WOOLNER (T.) . . . i Wordsworth 4, 6, 17, ao, 2G, : Worthey (Mrs.) Wright (Rev. A.) Wright (MissG.) Wright (J.) . Wright (L.) . Wright (M. O.) Wright (W. A.) WULKER (Dr.) . WuRTZ (Ad.) . Wyatt (Sir M. D.) . 24. • 3» . 9. 10, 2fr- . 34- 28, 31 9,18,25,40 . 16 . 9. 3- Yeo(J.) .... 34 YoE (Shway) . . .47- YoNGE (CM.) 6, 8, 9, f2, 13, 14, 24, a6, 28, 32, 38, 4^ Young (E.W.) . . lo Younghusband(G. J. and F. E.) . . . . 3» ZiEGLER (Dr. £.) • . ag. MACMILLAN AND CO., Ltd., LONDON. to:soljlg6 J. P&LMEK, PRINTER, ALUXANDRA STREET, CAMBRIDGE,