j^ f" J^^even Old ladlgs Qn Oprrdta in two acts fTff' K, C,Bunn?r Mi* r:> (Cornell IntoBraitg Htbrary BOUGHT WITH THE INCOME OF THE SAGE ENDOWMENT FUND THE GIFT OF HENRY V/. SAGE 1891 r The date shows when this volume was taken. To renew this book copy the call No. and give to f the librarian. HOME USE RULES _ All Books subject to Recall All borrowers must regis- — ^- •"■ in the library to borrow books for home use. All books must be re- turned at end of college year for inspection and repairs. Limited books must be re- turned within the fourweek limit and not renewed.. " Students must return all J books before leaving town. Officers should arrange for ...: the return of books wanted during their absence from ...'. town. Volumes of peri(jdicals "od of pamphlets are held '» the library as much as possible. For special pur- poses they are givenaSfit for a limited time. • '•■ — Borrowers should not use their library , privileges for the benefit of other persoiis. Books of aspeoial value »P Conversational Charles C. Confucius I Agglomeration of Waxworks. Henry the Eighth Napoleon B(jnaparte The Fairy Aunty Macassa. ) The Duchess of Tidytown. i Mrs. Smith Mrs. Brown Mrs. Jones , . , . ,,1. \ 1 he Seven Little Ola Ladies or Mrs. Robinson > r j ^ ^, „ I Lavender 1 own. Mrs. Simpkins Mrs. Timpkins Mrs. Tralala de Montmorenci A Page. The Scene is laid in Kategreenawayland. The Time is Once Upon a Time. THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN INTRODUCTION Allegro con fuoco. -f^-^ ^— e- ^^M £^£i %^ ^^ ^^^m 3==Sii 1 1 ;t— t=t ! g^y # ip „- ^ :^c I r £ (p^ --£- =*-^ ^ :p=p: b£5a * :i^_^j; g ife 4 piu lento. /TV q=fc:^ :^ 1^ — *i- rj J_^^_^c E ^ Iff: Iff: ^^ iffzzS ^3^ =i^ =«it »^ ^ ^^. -tf*t #^ # 5^^ /» =ff=ff- :ff^ E= THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN Aiidniitc lici} Irr/nto. 1P^ Alh'fii'ii modcrnto. p (irnzhixii WFW^B^—f- jiiK/ii li'ii'icro. e^fe :£ s=^ ^ ^^ :«4f*P=^S= -^^ THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN 8va.. 8m. THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN Aivlaiiti' hen Icfinfii. ~^ ^ — : ^r =r^^^?E^ Allegro moderato. P:J: 1^ ^=^^=^ s^ ytip=«= jO gradoso, e 4t^i * i S- poco legiero. ^=^ ^E ^^ S iBp= g I q^" ^-^ — f = iife^* r ^ i ^ — « i=^ 4 =ffi*= THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN 8va. 8va. THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN The first act takes place in the afternoon, and the stage represents the interior of a booth in Tidytown Fair. It is a plain room, with a bench near the door on each side, and at the back a low platform, over which a curtain hangs. On the curtain are letters : PROFESSOR LIGHTNING HASKINS'S GREAT MECHANICAL AND CONVERSATIONAL AGGLOMERATION OF WAXWORKS. When the play begins this curtain hides the platform. Professor Lightning Haskins is standing at the door to the right. Chorus of Fair-goers (outside). Allegro- % ^m- Curtain. -^m ^ J - s^^^ 1 — r ^r#^^ / fc5L ^A- 1 T_ ;e ^K ^ 3 -iS — =•- THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN Chorus (off the stage). ^ --S — J- m We are the folks of Ti dy-town, and clev er folk are tie ^i=s poco rail. ^^ ^^^ m- +=3: (^ J:- ^ -51 =4- -^1 — ^ «^ — =1 — =^ ~=! T -=( — =1- s^ -=i — ^- -^ ^ 3 ^ — =1- ■^1 — =1- -==1 — =1- ^ -^ ^ t >r a^ ^ — ^ — ^ ^ ^=1 S- ^: = J 1— ^-- we; un to the fair we gay ly go, the won drous things to see. And i ^ -^ r- 11 ^ 1 1 g^g^ 11 J 1 1 -> 1 1 -=i — ==;- W^ ? i ^ 3e i — ^ — 3= -=i — =^1 — s- -q 1 % m — ^1 — ^ •==1 — ^ -q — ^ -=^1 — 5) « — =1 =1- ^ - 1 1 y THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN E^3 we'd ad mire this mer ry show, and nev er m pay cent. No, =^:=5z -^ — ^ — ^ %=i ^ E^ Ei -=1 =1- f -=1 — =1- ^^ ^^=^=-^=3^=^-= (Haskins speaks.) > ^ ^ ^ =^ C HORUS. s ^ 1 *i 1 a =1- K 1 '* 1 1 ^ — ^1- H nev er pay a r^f^=^-^ 'J J ^ -- ^^^ F — ^ cent! What: nev er =? ^ S T- pay — s — a -* ^^ cent ? H 8va. . -8 — =^l — ^ s 1 1 '1 — - — »— I ^ -^ — -1 -•■ ^^ ^i^i ~r -^ ^ 1 ^ |^j4f ^ . ++.,. mf — •^ « N^ H Y 1 IP? ^ 8^ h ' —\ ^ ^-W^ — ■» g.— ^ L-s ^ ' ' ^ ' : Haskins {gloomily). That's the truth. The people hereabouts won't pay for anything. They get all the sights free if they can ; if they can't, they just stand around the door and look at the signs. I've been trav- elling with these waxworks of mine for seven years to- day, and I never found such a mean fair as this one. People hereabouts don't seem to appreciate true art. \He looks out the door.'] There they go, flocking into the show of that fellow with the common old-fashioned wax- works. Now my waxworks are an extra fine, fairy-made article, and they move their arms and legs and make speeches, and nobody comes to see them. Oh, it's dis- couraging to an artist ! There ! There goes a grand lady with a long train. I'll wager she goes over the way. No. Good gracious ! she's coming straight here. \_Enter^ very grand and stately, and jnuffled in a great cloak, the Duchess of Tidytown. Haskins bows very low.] Good- afternoon, madam. THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN Duchess {sternly). Your Grace ! Haskins. My — what? I beg your pardon, madam. Duchess. Your Grace ! Haskins {flattered). Oh no, madam. That's not my title. Just Professor Lightning Haskins — simply Pro- fessor — Duchess {severely). Will you call me your Grace ? Haskins {meekly). Oh yes, certainly, madam — your Grace, I mean. Duchess. Do you know who I am .? Haskins. No, your Grace. Duchess. I am the Duchess of Tidytown. Haskins. Delighted to meet your Grace. Allow me to introduce myself — Professor Lightning — Duchess {paying no attention to him). I have come here to satisfy myself as to the character of your exhi- bition. Haskins {going towards the curtain). Certainly, your Grace. Let me show you the Grand Agglomera- tion — Duchess. No. I don't want to see it ; I only wish to hear about it. Haskins. Same price, your Grace. This show is so expensive that I can't afford to talk about it for nothing. Duchess. Here is a guinea — a golden guinea. Give me as little conversation as you can for the money. Haskins. As little ? Duchess. Just as little as you can, or a trifle less. You have only to answer my questions. I wish to know if your exhibition is a proper one for proper young ladies. Haskins. My show is the properest show in all the fair, your Grace. The character of my waxworks is un- excelled, and they utter only the noblest sentiments, out of the copy-books. Duchess. If I am satisfied with your performance, I will send my daughters here this evening. But there must be nothing in the entertainment to offend the daughters of a Duchess. Haskins. Madam, your Grace, I mean — my waxworks would not offend anybody. Just look at them. \He draws the curtain aside^ Here they are — George Washington, Julius Caesar, Alexander the Great, John Smith — all excellent men. Duchess. Very respectable, I believe. They have been dead some time, have they not ? Haskins. I guarantee them to be all dead. Here is Confucius, the Chinese philosopher, Napoleon Bonaparte, and Henry the Eighth. Duchess. Henry the Eighth ! But he was a man who had six wives ! Haskins. Oh, but he hasn't now. He is quite reformed THE DUCHESS THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN since he joined my show. He is now a confirmed old bachelor. \^He closes the curtain. Duchess. And you are sure that your exhibition is fit for a Duchess's daughters } Haskins. Your Grace, it's fit for two Duchesses' daughters. {Confidentially^ I don't mind telling you, your Grace, that \ got the whole outfit from a fairy, who sold them out cheap. They are all very respectable people, whom she changed into waxworks because they offended her. They are not at all common waxworks, and they are to be seen every afternoon and evening for the low price of one shilling — three shillings to Duchesses' daughters. Duchess. Very well. I shall expect you to give a private performance, for the entertainment of my daugh- ters, at precisely seven o'clock this evening. The ,vulgar public must be excluded. Haskins. From what I have seen of this town, your Grace, that will be easy. Going already? Just look once more at the waxworks [drawing the curtain aside]. They are as natural as life. Duchess. No, I cannot. If I should look at them any longer, I should want to pinch them, and that would be beneath the dignity of a Duchess. [She goes out proudly. Haskins. Well, this is something like business at last. Three shillings apiece ! I hope she's got a large family. Aha ! I feel like the great original Haskins once more. ^ Allegro. Song. (^) ^^ 3 :tfc w^-^- -^i=^ ^=^=^ I. I dust my wax-works off at night, and in the ear ly ^E^E^-^m C=P^ Sit ^^ ^ r-— -=^. -3 ^ 5r ^^=^ ^ p i :f3 ^ =^^ Ttrz !l^E ^^^ 1' =^-Og^P- {«) For text of second and third verses, see p. 78. THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN ^m ^==f^^=^ m ^ J 3tz=Si dawn ing, O ; I hang my sign - board up in sight, and low er down my #=^^^^# i -5: :iir P ^^^^^^^ TfTTrr^i^^ :?e:^::p: ^=^3! rrrrrrr^ S3 :ea -! .^^i — ^ ^ = f< K -I K =^ 1^^ ^ =S=^ -^ J- awn - ing, O. For /'»« ^ ^ Light riing Has kins, O, for /^W Light - ning ^i *i]^ i # a * i ■* * ^ 1 1 ^ :* =B ^1 * < J , 1 ^-^=^ t± fe^ 1 aiff: ^ g E ggH#_*' ^^ ^gI fef==^ ■t=t=t: ^ ^ S -=i — ^- i^ — J J:: Has kins, O. I do not know a bet ter show than that of Lightning Has - kins, O. 10 THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN i For first atid secona verses. AJter tUira verse. S ^ I w 1 y - fcr ^^m e e-e- (a) ^ Continue, ad libituTn. 2. I 3- I ^ ^ — «-s i -=i — =1- S-^ 5r / PP ^m. s EiE :^=^= ^^ -t^ =S^ E^ :*P: »=-^ =g=^=^:=^S— q — ^ 2. I putty up the horrid holes Where people pinch their calveses, O ; I sell admission cards in shoals, The wholeses and the halveses, O. For I'm Lightning Haskins, O, for f'm Lightning Haskins, O. I do not know a better show than that of Lightning Haskins, O. 3. I rise and speak a little speech When people come to see them, O ; But though their bloom is like the peach, I wouldn't like to be them, O. For Pfn Lightning Haskins, O, for I'm Lightning Haskins, O. I do not ax to turn to wax, for I am Lightning Haskins, O. Yes, I am Lightning Haskins, but it does not look as though people generally knew it. [LooMng ou/.'] Ah! my luck has changed. Here comes an audience — all in a row. {^Enter Mrs. Smith, Mrs. Brown, Mrs. Jones, Mrs. Robinson, Mrs. Simpkins, Mrs. Timpkins, and Mrs. Tralala de Montmorenci. Haskins. Very glad to see you, ladies. Light- ning Haskins — Professor Lightning Haskins, at your service. Mrs. Smith. You are very polite, sir. Allow us to introduce ourselves. (a) A quiet dance step of four or eight measures. Ben moderato, e grasioso. THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN Chorus. — The Seven Old Ladies. 11 ^ :?c=P= :^=P= ^^ ^- - ^ — K- mi *- 1. We ... . 2. When . . •are old la - dies of ex - tra gen - til i - ty ; we were young we were no - ted for naught-i - ness, . sempre legato. ^^^^^^ 1^ ' all. wil thro' the world we are ful and pet u - lant ^*= 1-= ?=^^ ■f^ T :*=J= -^ 1 * i^ :t!=ff= S L^ ^ \^ tg=^ wan-der-ing free, per-sons were we ; and we blend . . . our de - co - rum with lightsome a gil i ty ; but we all. have been prop-er ly pun-ished for haught-i-ness, we re we're 12 THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN i ^ r^^ ^-- zpi=rii -^^^-j^- -^•^ ^S= i=q^ anx - ious to see what it is we can see. hus-band - less now, . and we're homeless, you see. We're so po - lite and we dress so We're so po lite and we dress so nev - er re - ceive the least mite of a frown. nev er re - ceive the least mite of a frown. We're the seven old la - dies We're the seven old la - dies u of Lav of Lav en - der en - der ^b ^ m THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN -K h N old la - dies of Lav - en 3 13 i 1^ ::3— -^-r -— — n— -X Town, Town, der Town, der Town. Mrs. Smith. If you'd like to hear anything more about us, sir, we shall be happy to tell you anything you wish to know. Our history is very interesting. Haskins {pompously). Not at all — not at all. It's not necessary. I have no doubt that you are properly re- spectable persons whom I may with propriety admit to my show. The exhibition will now begin. \_He draws aside the curtain^ Behold, ladies, the — Hold on a moment {letting curtain close^ One shilling apiece, if you please. Mrs. Jones. Mrs. Brown has all the shillings, I believe. Mrs. Brown. Excuse me ; I gave them to Mrs. Tralala de Montmorenci. Mrs. Tralala de Montmorencl Mrs. Smith took them away from me when we came to the shop where they sold dolls. I'm so giddy, you know. Mrs. Smith {producing money). Here they are. But I have only six shillings. Would you mind taking two sixpences for Mrs. Tralala de Montmorenci, sir } Haskins {taking money). Not at all. {He draws cur- tain aside.^ You now behold, ladies, the Great Mechan- ical and Conversational Agglomeration of Waxworks. These, ladies and gentlemen — ladies ; I beg your pardon — are the only waxworks in the world that really work. You will now hear them recite their pieces and move their arms and legs, all for one shilling apiece. Mrs. Tralala de Montmorenci. And two sixpences. Oh, I forgot ! I oughtn't to talk. [ T/ie curtain being drawn aside, displays the Wax- works seated in chairs. As Haskins calls upon each one, he rises, speaks his piece with appro- priate gestures, and sits down. Haskins walks along the platform, pointing out the characters. Haskins. Here, ladies and gentlemen, you see the THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN 15 Mrs. Jones. We prefer our waxworks silent. Haskins. Certainly, ladies. Here we have the great Confucius — Charles C. Confucius, of China, the gentle- man who invented the Chinese alphabet, which contains seventy-one thousand four hundred and sixty-nine letters and three postal cards. This is Henry the Eighth of England. He was a King when he was alive, and he is dusted off twice as often as any other waxwork in the show. And here, ladies and gentlemen, the exhibition closes with the great Napoleon Bonaparte, the original inventor of white duck trousers. Now, ladies and gentle- men, you have seen the wonders that it is my privilege to exhibit to you, and you may go home and marvel at the gigantic progress of science and art without extra charge. \Puring the lecture the Seven Old Ladies have followed Haskins, expressing surprise and pleas- ure at the sight of each Waxwork. At the close of the discourse they appear much affected. At close of lecture Haskins draws the curtain. Chorus. — The Seven Old Ladies. i Allegro giusto. J .81 j8 xj^-j ^^n-j j-j^ ^^ m 3?3j^ wtziaL I. We're ver - y much pleased with the beauti-ful show ; you've told us some things we're de- ft— ^^-^ ft— ftl-^ ^B? ^ ^ ^E^ w=^ ^ S ^ -7^ *> mind us too much of the long a go, these beau-ti - ful folks in your :Pi^ ^ % ^ r r — V — h 1^ p ^ 16 THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN ^^^ S S 1^=:^= <— -* i^ =g?=g ~^ -*—mf -m)^-i^ light-ed to know. In your whole ex - hi - bi - tion there's nothing that lacks ; we're pleased with your ways, and we're ■** -»0^ — ^ ai — ji J^ — J^ ^ ^ — ^ — h- ^r=r=^ g=E =S^=i: beau - ti - ful show ; they re - call the sad time when in an-ger and pride the laws of po - lite ness we ^ ^«=^ ET =»U= =^ 3^i= W ~^^ ^= i 1^ ^3£ -^^—^ - * * - ^=^ pleased with your wax. But if you don't mind, we will drop just here a sor-row-ful -ft— .^- l-f ^ SE3E3E^ ^^^E^^^. tear. -S ,!r j^ — — i3 , — -*±=:*--=S :*=zz«!z:=*: - S^ ^^ w>^^ bold ly de - fied. We were rude to our husbands one ter - ri ble day, and the Fair y Ma - cas - sa, she m ^ ;5f= ^ =*i= -^ ipi THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN 17 5fe* a=B ? ?^ E^ — t^ ■— !«« 1^ k*^ yoii may not know; sim pie tear. The cause of that tear 'tis no of - fence to your F=r=:^ ^»=^ % ^ ^ -m-9m- ^ » ' t^ - -* — *► — s^- ^ r ^ r- »- ^ — ^ w -9- S» 9 9 W ■ — l"^ W took them a - way ; and so that is the rea - son, as you may know, that we weep at the sight of your ^ 't=W- -^^ 5^ ^ ^ ^ ^^- W^=^ - poco piu lento. pooo ritardando. fep= ^^^^ b^ fcJ ^ -^Sr -^i^ i J, h h ^ )^-iLj.^ ^^^^i^ J ^S ^ ¥ ¥ splendid show — Oh, oh, ^^^ *: *^ . . the beau - ti ful show ! 2. They re =ss=i= =2^ i ^: ¥ W. love-ly show- Oh, oh, the beau - ti ful 3 show! ^-1-^>^L^ ^r ^^ ca • ^^ ^^ =3 =r ^ mf piu lento. ^r^ ^ s =1 u i^^ft ^^ I s S ^^^ :«=♦ 18 THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN Mrs. Smith {brokenly). Thank you, sir. It — is — very — interesting. Mrs. Jones {almost weeping). We have been very much interested. Mrs. Brown {mournfully). I feel as if I were going to cry. Mrs. Tralala de Montmorenci {weeping). I don't believe I could giggle if I tried. Haskins. You seem to take waxworks pretty hard. Mrs. Smith. You cannot understand, sir. By your leave, I will tell you our sad story. Although we seem so old, we are young and beautiful. Seven years ago we were seven lovely brides, and we lived in Lavender Town, near Rosemary Lane. Alas, we quarrelled with our good husbands, and they quarrelled with us, although we were most desirable wives. To punish us for our bad tempers, the Fairy Aunty Macassa — we had no fairy godmother, but only a fairy aunty — turned us into seven old ladies, and condemned us to roam the world in search of our husbands, whom she turned into something else — we really don't know what. Haskins {aside). Good gracious! the Fairy Aunty Macassa! Why, that's my fairy! And these must be the wives of my waxworks. What will become of my business if they find it out .? Mrs. Jones. And all these years we have been wander- ing about, hoping to find our husbands somewhere. And we have been very much affected by a peculiar coinci- dence. Your beautiful waxworks have the same first names as our husbands, who were called — Mrs. Smith {sobbing). John ! Mrs. Jones {sobbing). George ! Mrs. Brown {sobbing). Julius I Mrs. Tralala de Montmorenci {sobbing). Alexander I The Seven Old Ladies {together, sobbing). And Henry, and Charles, and Napoleon 1 Haskins {aside). I must get them out of here at once, THE SEVEN YOUNG LADIES or they will take their husbands away with them. \_Aloud^^ Ladies, you must excuse me, but this show closes promptly at five, and it's two seconds past five now. Mrs. Smith. Oh, dear me, sir, we're sorry. We won't detain you. But perhaps you will allow us — Haskins. I'll allow you anything — only this show closes promptly — Mrs. Smith. If you'll only allow us to sing one little song before we go I THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN 19 Haskins {desperately). Well, sing it, and go. Never mind the key. Mrs. Smith. It is a song which the fairy told us to sing, and if our husbands hear it they will recognize us. Haskins (a.f?flfe). Oh! oh! oh! I'm done for! Chorus. Moderato. S fi- ^ — -S- ^ i^s -^ legato. ^3P The Old Ladies — i. Lav - en - der Vil - lage is The Waxworks — 2. Lav -en -der Vil -lage is ^^ ^3 ^S ^ ^i—^l W^ ^ .J-"j^ g.-^ -/- P i -fcfi: P ~-| 1 ^^¥S- ^^^P^ 1 a ytzre: 4ti^ far, far a -way, o ver the hills for a year and a day. far, far a - way. When we were there, oh, why did we not stay ? Can you re - mem - ber the We can re - mem - ber, re - m E^ -t^-^ -»i- -ai- #^^ =^i=a= rrtif t-T -«-^ s s E 20 THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN ift*: ^ m i^=f:r hap pi er hours spent in the rose - ma ry, rose - ma ry bowers ? mem - ber a - right, when we were there we were not so po - lite. ■poco rail. Out in the gar - den the We can re - mem -ber you tea got ta ble set, in a pet. out in the gar - den the tea we can re - mem - ber you got Lav Lav ■ en - der Vil lage, Lav • en - der Vil lage, Lav en - der Vil en - der Vil lage, oh, can lage, oh, can you for get ? we for i 3 ±=^=n i AH=a= m -N il -V mf T' -^- ^^ m W-. ^m f^ ^ E Fed. * Fed. (a) At the dose of the act the curtain begins to descend at this point. THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN 21 Haskins {drawing curtain aside). What is this ? \Tableau. The Seven Old Ladies and the Wax- works recognize each other. Haskins is desperate. The Seven Old Ladies. Give us our husbands. Haskins. Never ! They're mine. I bought them from the fairy. This show closes promptly at five. I don't want to be impolite, but — get out ! Mrs. Smith. We'll have them yet. [Haskins tears his hair, and urges The Seven Old Ladies out. They depart, stretching out their arms to the Waxworks, who stretch out their arms, but cannot leave their places. All sing ^'Lavender Villager Haskins tears his hair again. Curtain. ACT II. The scene is the same, at night. The curtain of the platform is drawn away, and the Waxworks are seen covered up with sheets or furniture covers. And while they are covered up they sing. Chorus. — Waxworks. i 't^ i^& Allegro moderato. Curtain. 3 ^ ^ For life in a wax-work show, for home in a coun - try fair, where you're i IE THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN 23 ^r^ - ' I » > ^ al - ways, al - ways on the go, we do not, do not pre - cise ly care : for life in a wax - work -F 1 1 1 1 — S S -^ — > s _S : ^r=^ show, t for home in a coun - try fair. * where you're al - ways, al - ways on the go, we do ^ Sr i m s^^ m 1*-!*- £ * eT—s. V=t:^ =^ = ^^^ =?«=^ ^= ^^ i ^3E ^=ff= tM-- K — ^ not pre -cise ly care. For our hair is drop - ping out, we're a half - inch thick with 24 THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN r ^ ^ h F ^ -Jt=Si ^ -9> — V =B dust, m i«=^i and folks who are full of lin-ger-ing doubt, they pinch thro' the ten der crust. m For ^^m ^ 5"=5= -^=s^- =i=^: ^ ^=S= ^^=^ i»^^ *i — a MM=^=^^^ 3?^ <— * =if=^ ^ • ^'^-J= t » 6 * life in a wax- work show, for home in a coun-try fair, where you're al-ways, al - ways on the go, we do 'i=^ -*=^ ig » ^ ' 7 7 ^ -^ ^ -* — si ^- ^ ¥^ ¥ not, do not pre cise ly care ; for life in a wax- work show, for home in a coun - try fair, where you're ^ 5^=r=g - feE^^^ ^ -g-r=g:g: -j*«- iff: -i«-«- 3^s; ■t"— Mz iffzt ^ r-p: ^ THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN 25 I ^ -^i=^ f*-^ ig^^ - I J -^^-0). al - ways, al - ways on the go, we do not pre-cise - ly care. [Haskins enters, and proceeds to take off their covers and dust them off with a feather duster^ Haskins. Here's a nice piece of business ! If I hadn't that engagement to entertain the Duchess's daughters to- PROFESSOR HASKINS DUSTING OFF night, I'd pack up and get out of the town before those women could come back. I've said Abracadabra to these miserable waxworks until I can't say it any more ; and the spell doesn't seem to work as it used to. The fairy didn't tell me that these waxworks had wives, or I wouldn't have bought them. Well, it's time for the Duchess's daughters. And here they are, right on time. \_Enter the Duchess's Daughters, cloaked and hooded. '2{> Allegro grasioso. THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN Chorus. W- ^ e Iff: -F F ^ itr -r^ I. Oh, m^ 4^^^ s ^ J ^ — y- >=^ m ^ ^=^=^ IC :i=*= i»t==*; 1 ^ t / we are the Duch-ess - 's, the Duch - ess 's girls, and prop - er young peo - pie are we ; our se urns are hor - ri - bly, oh, hor ri bly low, and so are me nag - e - ries too ; but 8va. -m-:^—^—\. \ ^— g-,- f— ff ^ f ^ V ^= THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN 27 i 1ST Solo. i m hair is in tight lit - tie, tight lit - tie curls, and we al-ways take five o'- clock tea. you have an ex eel - lent, ex eel lent show, and a man of re - fine-ment are you. We So WSr P m ^ r ^ 1^ zd Solo. jd Solo. N h T =i^ ^=M=.J. -- ^—J ^ ^ =^ like ver - y much to see shows, show us no hor - ri - ble shapes. if they are in-struc-tive to youth, no mon keys in co - coa - nut trees, 8va. and no mr ^ ^ S "g" A t < <- *fia£ :S=0? ? ^-^ i^ 1^^ leggiero. f> P ^ g ^g^ -ipi — »^ i 3-* ^E* Chorus. =i=^ -^— r- -w — ^ yours is the kind, we are led to sup pose, where the show - man strict ly tells the truth. And li ons or ti ■ gers, hy e nas or apes, and no hip po po po ta mus, please. No iE 1 ¥ I -i==^ 5i * -^ / \^^- 3^^J= £ =tt^ ~- m J- 28 THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN I )— ^ J ^ r '=^ — t^ yours is the kind, we are led to sup - pose, where the show - man strict ly tells the truth, li ons or ti gers, hy e nas or apes, and no hip po po po Haskins {obsequiously). Always, young ladies ; I always tell the truth, and \confidentially\ a great deal more. Please be seated. The show — the exhibition — is about to begin. \They seat themselves on the benches, and he begins his lecture.] Here, ladies and gentlemen, you see the great Julius Caesar. He is now dead. This was an unparalleled feat in those days. Julius Caesar will now speak his piece. Abracadabra, Julius. Julius C/«sar. When I arrived at the, age of seven years my father presented me with a bright new hatchet, and I at once — Haskins. Hold on ! That isn't your piece. " All Gaul is divided into three parts — " Julius C^sar. It ain't. Haskins. What's that ? Julius Caesar. It ain't. 'HOLD ON, THAT ISN'T YOUR PIECE' 30 THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN Haskins. Never mind if it isn't. You say so. Julius C^sar. I won't. Haskins. What does this mean ? Julius C^sar. We've struck. George Washington. We have formed the Waxworks Union. "WHAT 'LL you take FOR THEM?" Alexander. And we won't waxwork. Julius C^sar. Unless we can have our wives again. [ Tke ladies applaud. The Duchess {entering, followed by a Page with a bandbox). What is this I hear? Unseemly language from waxworks .? Is this the exhibition to which I have sent my daughters? Haskins {desperately). I beseech your Grace's pardon. My waxworks have struck, and I can't do anything with them. [ To the Waxworks.] Philopena, the whole lot of you. The Waxworks. Philopena yourself. Duchess. Let us submit this matter to arbitration. What do these gentlemen want ? The Waxworks. We want our wives ? Duchess. Quite right and proper. Give them their wives. Haskins. I haven't got their wives. I can't give them any wives. Duchess. Then I will. Haskins. You will ? Duchess. Yes. Here they are. [ The Duchess's Daughters rise and throw off their wraps, appearing as The Seven Old Ladies, wz/j/ made young again. They form a line and sing. Chorus. — The Seven Old Ladies. The chorus is a repetition of the first verse of No. 4 of the first act, with the word " young " substituted for " old." \And they all courtesy. Haskins. But — look here ; you can't do that. Nobody can do that sort of thing but the Fairy Aunty Macassa. Duchess. And I am the Fairy Aunty Macassa. Vivace. THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN Song. — The Duchess. 31 ^ 3t=5f r~ j ^ ^ ^=^ ^ ^ ^ lightsome and sprightsome, ca most ly of sud - den re pri-cious and air y; pen-tance I'm wa ry ; high in all fai ry - land is still, when I see how these wan my po si - tion, and ■ der ers, blight-ed, who guard-ing your mor - als my ear -nest ly wish to be )ff „ f f ttt -g-:£: -*- ex - eel - lent mis - sion ; tho' stern my de - crees when a fast re u nit ed, are prom - is ing nev - er to mor - quar • tal is sin-ning; as rel or squab-ble, and 32 THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN $ ^=S= W=^ =Sit =*=i= great nev - my joy when for - give - ness he's win-ning; and here is a case where I'm bound to con - sid er — the from love's nar-row path-way to wob - ble, sweet mer - cy with jus - tice I sure ly must min - gle, and 5: fl=^ ^^ I IIE^. Ei? ^-^- case of y a wife who must live like a wid - der, a wife who must live like a wid-der. the hus-band who lives as if sin - gle, the hus - band who lives as if sin - gle. Do you not recognize me? l^S^e throws off her cloak, and appears in a brilliant costume. Haskins. I don't know whether I do or not. Where are your wings ? Duchess {beckoning to the Page). Here in this band- box. You don't want to make me go to the trouble of putting them on, do you.? Haskins. Oh, no, your Grace. But you won't mind my looking at them, will you ? \^He takes the wings out.'] What '11 you take for them .? Duchess. They are not for sale. I use them in my THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN 33 business. [Haskins puts them back.'\ I have come here to announce that as the seven young married couples of Lavender Town are sincerely penitent for their past naughtiness, I have decided to pardon them, and release them from their spell. By my marvellous power I have changed these Seven Old Ladies back to Seven Young Brides, and by my marvellous power I will now free these seven Waxworks. \_She takes Haskins's stick and waves it. The Waxworks descend from, the platform, and each one embraces his wife. Mrs. Smith. John! John Smith. Jemima! Mrs. Jones. George ! George Washington. Gloriana! Mrs. Brown. Julius! Julius C^sar. Josephine! Mrs. Tralala de Montmorenci. Alexander ! Alexader the Great. Anne ! Mrs. Robinson, Mrs. Simpkins, and Mrs. Timpkins. Our husbands ! Napoleon, Confucius, and Henry the Eighth. Our wives ! Chorus. — The Seven Old Ladies and the Waxworks. 34 i V f =^ ^ THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN — _ _ r - h I r* i A 0. m ~~ I = f R^ _J z:— #:J = r ^ ^ ^ — * geth er un til — we don't know P=R we're our-selves a gain, and now we will live to tt=^ %^^- ^^ "C^ -^ es H m^ ^it=J= :»i^ g » J ^ i^ ^ ^ d^ ^-f-^ ::P=^ ^ ^ E£ ^ ^^' ^ 1 '^ J :4t=^ *=*: when. It's ver y much more pleas - ant 1 than P=^^ ^ J- -> J- ^ trapes ing round the coun - try or than be ing in a show, than trapes ing round the i p__^ f. t^^4 i ^^ EgS ffi mf Etc "^ E^ ^^ ^^ ^ ^ ^ m/ P ^ ^ =1 ^ THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN 35 ^ ^^ i * i ' ^ — a show. coun - try or than be ing 8va m f r C" fei iP ^ ^^^eS * 1 X ^ j^ I r - 1 X ^ T3^- Haskins. And I — what will become of me ? Duchess. Don't worry. I'll make you a waxwork yourself, and sell you to somebody else. Julius C^sar. And now, dear Fairy, pray excuse us if we seem to ask too much, but — Mrs. Smith. Our husbands are still waxworks. George Washington. If you could conveniently change us back. Duchess. Oh, certainly. I will change you back to your natural shapes. Haskins {maliciously). Perhaps you'll do that — by your "marvellous power." Duchess. I will. Haskins (defiantly). Well, do it, then. Duchess. I will — as soon as the curtain falls. Finale. Omnes. ^^ -^ h h h r^ V — V — Lav - en - der Vil-lage is far, far a- way. V — k o - ver the hills for a year and a day. m m -*- -w^ 1W^g- i =«=:it ?i 1 — p 1 36 THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN i^^ :s=:qsf: ^^=^- ■--^J=.-^ :^=P= Well we re - mem - ber the bright, hap py hours bliss - ful ly spent in its rose - ma ry bowers ! 1:j ^ ^ ^ i ~0"^tf 3 '^^^ ^ s=p= H*-*- ^ -1^^ it=P^-P: ^ ^ tJ- $^ S stW^i i Waxworks. Old Ladies. ^ ,. ^ ^ '^ 1 Leav - ing the show with - out sigh or re-gret. :#*= Nev - er a gain will we get in a pet. Sjt- — =1- -T::?- 4- r*r=-Jt :S«ii=r ^^— g: ^flJ^^^lF ^i=t. -P f I* ' 1 ^ — 1*= -Q-^TP^ 5*— r /» r ^E2 £ s ^ i Omnks. ^ ]g — r =p=^^= sq=e= 3=r :^=^ l-=t=^ Lav en der Vil lage, Lav - en - der Vil lage, Lav en - der Vil lage, we ne'er will for - THE SEVEN OLD LADIES OF LAVENDER TOWN 37 i ± i fi^ S ^ =1- get. Curtain. mr- ^ 1 — n- i -i — « — ^ ^^' 5= ^ i=-^ mf te^rrf Uxff^ g -^^ :ptt: g -:p:- =P=— 5^1 — n -j^ 1 £ Curtain.