CORNELL UNIVERSITY LIBRARY ' STEWART H. BURNHAM FUND Cornell University Library The original of tliis book is in tine Cornell University Library. There are no known copyright restrictions in the United States on the use of the text. http://www.archive.org/details/cu31 92401 3200609 THAYELS INTO SETKRAL ills i 1 IN FOUR PARTS. By LEMUEL GULLIVER, c P^.^-^J riRST A SUKGEON AND THEN A CAPTAIN OP SEVKKAL SUIPS. Splbndide Mendax. — Hob. WITH COPIOUS NOTES, AND A LIFE OF THE AUTHOR. By W. C. TAYLOR, LL.D., OF TRINITY COLLEGE, DUBLIN. PHILADELPHIA: PORTER & C A T E S, P K E F A C E. Through the kindness of the Eev. Charles Bathurst Wood- man, the editor is enabled to offer to the reader some interesting documents respecting the original publication of Gulliver's Travels which have not been hitherto made public. In the Life of Swift, it has been stated that these Travels were originally de- signed to form part of a Satire on the Abuse of Human Learning, projected by Swift, Pope, and Arbuthnot conjointly. The plan of the work was probably suggested by the celebrated treatise of Ludovicus Yives, "De Abusu Literarum," and Lucian'S True History; and the part of it completed on the original design was published as the Memoirs of Martinus Scriblerus. In the notes to this edition, it has been stated that the first hint of these Travels appears in Scriblerus, also that the pedantic Martin was originally designed to be the hero of the tale, and that Pope was by no means pleased when the erudite scholar was supplanted by the plain, sturdy seaman, Lemuel Gulliver. Having so far deviated from the original plan. Swift perceived that he had a favorable opportunity for assailing his political enemies under the guise of fictitious characters : his own disappointments were aggravated by the sufferings of his friend Bishop Atterbury, who had been exiled by an act of attainder, — a measure of questionable justice at all times, and in this instance equally harsh and unnecessary. The notes will show that Swift fully availed himself of the opportunity. When the work was completed, he appears to have become alarmed, and anxious to conceal his authorship, for the ministers of the day had shown little scruple in the use of means for crush- ing a political adversary, and the law of libel was administered with more than ordinary severity. Some of the artifices which the Dean employed to save himself from the Attorney-General ( 7 ) 8 PREE-ACE. are mentioned in the Life ; we shall now show that he at first kept his secret from his publisher. The following is the letter which was sent with the MS. when it was offered for publication, (Copy.) For Mr. Mottk. London, August 8th, 1726. Sir : My cousin, Mr, Lemuel Gulliver, intrusted me some years ago with a copy of his Travels ; whereof that which I here send you is about a fourth part, for I shortened them very much, as you will find in my preface to the reader. I have shown them to several persons of great judgment and distinction, who are confident they will sell very well. And although some parts of this and the following volume, may be thought in one or two places to be a little satirical, yet it is agreed they will give no oflfence, but in that you must judge for yourself, and take the advice of your friends, and if they or you be of another opinion, you may let me know it when you return these papers, which I expect shall be in three days at furthest. The good report I have received of you makes me put so great a trust into your hands, which I hope you will give me no reason to repent, and in that confidence, I require that you will neversuffer these papers to be once out of your sight. As the printing these Travels will probably be of great value to you, so as a manager for ray friend and cousin, I expect you will give a due consideration for it, because I know the author intends the profit for the use of poor seamen, and I am advised to say, that two hundred pounds is the least sum I will receive on his account ; but if it shall happen that the sale will not answer as I expect and believe, then whatever shall be thought too much, even upon your own word, shall be duly repaid. Perhaps you may think this a strange way of proceeding to a man of trade, but since I begin with so great a trust to you whom I never saw, I think it not hard that you should trust me as much ; therefore if, after three days reading and consulting these papers, you think it proper to stand to my agreement, you may begin to print them, and the subsequent parts shall be all sent you, one after another, in less than a week, provided that immediately upon your resolution to print them, you do within three days, deliver a bank bill of two hundred pounds, wrapped up so as to make a parcel, to the hand from whence you receive this, who will come in the same manner exactly at nine o'clock on Thursday, which will be the 11th instant. If you do not approve of this proposal, deliver these papers to the person who will come on Thursday. If you choose rather to send the papers, make no other proposal of your own, but just barely write on a piece of paper that you do not accept my offer. I am, Sir, your humble servant, Richard Sympson. On a slip of paper which seems to have been, inclosed in the preceding letter, the following postscript appears : To Mr. Motte, August 13th, 1726. P. S.— I would have both volumes come out together, and published by Christmas . at furthest. r. Sympson. It appears that this communication was made through Mr. PREFACE. 9 Erasmus Lewis, who was intimately connected with Atterbury, and that neither Pope, Gay, nor Arbuthnot were admitted into the secret, though some intimation of it was conveyed to Lord Bolingbroke. Mr. Motte's answer to the proposal, though \evy business-like, leads to a suspicion that he had penetrated the., secret, or at least that he guessed the unknown author to be a person of some importance. (Copy of Mr. Motte's reply to Sympson's first proposal.) Sir : I return you your papers with a great many thanks, and do assure you, that since they have been in my custody I have faithfully deserved the good opinion you expressed of my integrity, but you were much mistaken in the estimate you made of my abilities when you supposed me able in vacation time (the most dead season of the year), at so short notice to deposit so considerable a sum as £200. By deliv- eriug the papers to the hearer, I have put you entirely in the same condition you were in before I saw them, but if you will trust my promise, or accept any security you can contrive or require for the payment of the money in six months, I will com- ply with any method you shall propose for that purpose. In the meantime I shall trust to your honor, and promise that what shall appear to be more tlian the suc- cess of it deserves shall be repaid, as you may depend upon a proper acknowledgment if the success answers or exceeds expectation. I have only to add, that before I re- ceived your letter, I had fixed a journey into the country, and wrote to some dealers there to appoint times when I should call upon them, so that I shall be obliged to set out this day sennight at farthest; therefore if you think fit to favor me with any further correspondence, desire I may hear from you as soon as possible. A considerable delay appears to have intervened, the cause of which is not explained, but it probably arose from Swift's cau- tion, and fear of Walpole's vengeance. His next letter is dated in the spring of the following year. Mr. C. B. Woodman has compared it with other letters of Swift in his possession, and be- lieves it to have been written by the Dean, though in a feigned hand, (Copy.) These for Mr. Motte, a Bookseller, at the Middle Temple Gate, in Fleet Street. Mr. MOTTK : I sent this inclosed by a friend to be sent to you, to desire that you would go J;o the house of Erasmus Lewis, in Cork Street, behind Burlington House, and let him know that you are come from me ; for to the said Mr. Lewis I have given full power to treat concerning my cousin Gulliver's book, and whatever he and you shall settle, I will consent to ; so I have written to him. You will see him best early in the morning. I am, your humble servant, April 27th 1727. Richard Sympson. Mr. Motte seems to have lost no time in brinn;inor the engage- 10 PREFACE. raent to a close, for on the same sheet with the foregoing is the following memorandum in another handwriting. London, May 4th, 1727. — I am fully satisfied. E. Lewis. The following fragment of another letter on the same subject shows that the bookseller was anxious to comply with all the requisitions of the author. The beginning is lost. That the book shall be piiblishud within a month after I receive thecopy, and if the success will allow it, I will punctually pay the money you requixe in six months, I shall thankfully embrace the offer. The bearer stays for an answer, so that I can only oifer a proposal without assigning a reason. These docugients were preserved by Charles Bathurst, "Esq., the grandfather of the Rev. Charles Bathurst Woodman, who was originally in i)artnership with Mr. Benjamin Motte. The Rev. C. B. Woodman, on seeing this new edition of Gulliver's Travels, proffered the copies of these interesting documents to the editor, though jDersonally unknown to him, and the editor takes this op- portunity of publicly expressing his thanks for so valuable an addition to Literary History. Of the editor's own share in this work little need be said. Many years ago, when studying English History, he obtained access to a valuable collection of books and pamphlets relating to the reigns of Anne and the first two Georges, belonging to a late prelate of the Church of Ireland. Amongst these was a copy of Gulliver's Travels with MS. notes, identifying some of the char- acters. These were copied by permission, and at a subsequent period' it became a source of amusement to extend and verify them. In compiling the life of Swift, the editor has not disguised his want of affection for the character of his hero ; but though unable to make the biography a eulogy, he has endeavored that it should not become a philippic. There are good points in the worst men, and bad in the best. Human life is the acted allegory of Beauty and the Beast. W. C. T. London. CONTENTS. Preface, 7 LiJE OF Swift, 17 The Publishkr to the Reader 67 A Letter from Captain Gullitek to his Cousin Sympson, 69 A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. CHAPTEE I. The Author gives some Account of Himself and Family^His first Inducements to Travel — He is shipwrecked, and swims for his Life — Gets safe on Shore in the Country of Lilliput — Is made a Prisoner, and carried up the Country, .... 75 CHAPTEE II. The Emperor of Lilliput, attended by several of the Nobility, comes to see the Author in his Confinenient^The Emperor's Person and Habit described — Leaiaed_.Men .appointed to teach the Author their Language — He gains Favor by his Mild Disposition — His Pockets are searched, and his Sword and Pistols taken from him, . . 92 CHAPTEE III. The Author diverts the Emperor, and his Nobility of both sexes, in a very uncommon manner — The Divei;sions^f the Court ofLillij; put described — The Author has his liberty granted him upon cer- tain conditions, 106 CHAPTEE IV. Mildendo, the Metropolis of Lilliput, described, together with the Emperor's Palace — A conver sation between the Author and a principaLSecrotary, concerning the affairs of that Empire — The Author offers to serve the Emperor in his wars, . . . 118 CHAPTEE V. The Author, by an extraordinary stratagem, prevents an invasion — A high Title of Honor is conferred upon him — Ambassadors arrive from the Emperor QUilefuaciiv_aiid_sue for Peaoo--The ( 11) 12 CONTENTS. Empress's Apartments on Fire by accident ; the Author Instru- mental in saving the rest of the Palace, .... 126 CHAPTER VI. Of the Inhabitants of Lilliput; their Learning, Laws,^nd Customs; the manner of educating their Children — The Author's way of living in that Country— His Vindication of a great Lady, . 136 CHAPTER VIL The Author being informed of a design to accuse him of High Treason, makes his Escape to Blefuscu — His Reception there, . . 149 CHAPTER VIII. The Author, by a lucky accident, finds means to leave Blefuscu ; and, after some difficulties, returns safe to his Native Country, . 161 Appendix to the Voyage to Lilliput, 171 Ode to Quinbus Elestrin , by Titty Tit, E.sq. . . 181 A VOYAGE TO BEOBDINGNAG. CHAPTER I. A great Storm described ; the Longboat sent to fetch Water, the Au- thor goes with it to discover the Country — He is left on Shore, is seized by one of the Natives, and carried to a Parmer's House — His reception, with several accidents that happened there — A de- scription of the Inhabitants, 183 CHAPTER IL A description of the Parmer's Daughter — The Author carried to a Market Town, and thence to the Metropolis^-The particulars of his Journey, 201 CHAPTER III. The Author sent for to Court — The Queen buys him of his Master the Farmer, and presents him to the King — He disputes with his Maj- esty's great Scholars — An Apartment at Court provided for the Author — He is in high favor with the Queen — He stands up for the honor of his own Country^His Quarrels with the Queen's Dwarf, . . 208 CHAPTER IV. The Country described — A proposal for correcting modern Maps — The King's Palace, and some account of the Metropolis — The Author's way of Travelling — The Chief Temple described, 221 CONTENTS. 13 CHAPTER V. Several Adventures that happened to the Author — The Execution of a Criminal — The Author shows his skill in Navigation, . 228 CHAPTER VI. Several contrivances of the Author to please the King and Queen — He shows his skill in Music — The King inquires into the state of Eng- land, which the Author relates to Him — The King's Observations thereon, • . 240 CHAPTER VII. The Author's love of his Country — He makes a proposal of much ad- vantage to the King, ■which is rejected — The King's great igno- rance in Politics — The Learning of that Country very imperfect and confined — The Laws and Military Affairs, and parties in the State, 255 CHAPTER VIII. The King and Queen make a progress to the Erontiers — The Author attends them — The manner in which he leaves the Country very particularly related — He returns to England, . . . 264 Thb Lamentation ov Glumdalclitch ifOB the Loss of Gril- DRio, . . , 279 A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, Etc. CHAPTER I. The Author sets out on his Third Voyage — Is taken by Pirates — The malice of a Dutchman — His arrival at an Island — He is received in Laputa, 281 CHAPTER II. The Humors and Disposition of the Laputians described — An account of their Learning — Of the King and his Court — The Author's Reception there — The Inhabitants subject to Pear and Disquie- tude — An account of the Women, 288 CHAPTER III. • A Phenomenon solved by modern Philosophy and Astronomy — The Laputians' great Improvements in the latter — The King's method of suppressing Insurrections 299 CHAPTER IV. The Author leaves Laputa — Is conveyed to Balnibarbi — Arrives at 14 CONTENTS. the Metropolis — A description of the Metropolis and of the Country adjoining — The Author hospitably received by a great Lord — His conversation with that Lord, .... 306 CHAPTBK V. The Author permitted to see the Grand Academy of Lagado — The Academy largely described — The Arts wherein the Professors employ themselves, 314 CHAPTER VI. A farther account of the Academy — The Author proposes some Im- provements, which are honorably received, . . . . 327 CHAPTER VII. The Author leaves Lagado — Arrives nt Maldonada — No Ship ready — Ho takes a short Voyage to Glubbdubdrib — His Reception by the Governor, 337 CHAPTER Vin. A farther account of Glubbdubdrib — Ancient and modern History corrected, 343 CHAPTER IX. The Author returns to Maldonada — Sails to the Kingdom of Luggnagg — The Author confined — He is sent for to Court — The manner of his admittance — The King's great Lenity to his Subjects, . 351 CHAPTER X. The Luggnaggians commended — A particular Description of the Struldbrugs, with many conversations between the Author and • some eminent Persons upon that subject, .... 356 CHAPTER XI. The Author leaves Luggnagg, and sails to Japan — Prom thence he returns in a Dutch ship to Amsterdam, and from Amsterdam to ^ England, . . 367 APPENDIX. Ballad on the South Ska Schemb, ... . 371 A South Ska Ballad, 379 Upon thk Hokrid Plot discovered by Harlequin, ths Bishop of Boohkstisk's French Dog, .... 382 CONTBNTS. 15 A VOYAGE TO THE COUNTRY OF THE HOUYHNHNMS. CHAPTEK I. The Author sets out as Captain of a Ship — His Men conspire against him, confine him a long time to his Cabin, and set him on Shore in an unknown Land — Ho travels up into the Country — The Ya- hoos, a strange sort of Animal, described — The Author meets two Houyhnhnms, . 385 CHAPTER II. The Author conducted by a Houyhnhnm to his House — The House described — The Author's Eoception — The Pood of the Houyhn- hnms — The Author in distress for want of Meat — Is at last re- lieved — His manner of Feeding in this Country, . . 394 CHAPTER III. The Author studies to learn the Language — The Houyhnhnm, his master, assists in teaching him — The Language described — Several Houyhnhnms of quality come out of curiosity to see the Author — He gives his Master a short Account of his Voyage, . 401 CHAPTER IV. The Houyhnhnm's notion of Truth and Palsehood — -The Author's Discourse disapproved by his Master — The Author gives a more particular account of himself, and the accidents of his Voy- age 408 CHAPTEK V. The Author, at his Master's command, informs him of the State of England-^The causes of "War among the Princes of Europe — The Author begins to explain the English Constitution, . . 415 CHAPTER VI. A continuation of the State of England under Queen Anne — the Character of a first Minister of State in European Courts, 424 16 CONTENTS. CHAPTER VII. The Author's great love of his native Country- — His Master's Obser- vations upon the Constitution and Administration of- England, as described by the Author, with parallel cases and comparisons — His Master's Observations upon Human Nature, . . 433 CHAPTEE VIII. The Author relates several particulars of the Yahoos — The great Vir- tues of the Houyhnhnms — The Education and Exercise of their Youth — Their General Assembly, 443 CHAPTER IX. A grand Debate at the General Assembly of the Houyhnhnms, and 11 how it was determined— The Learning of the Houyhnhnms — ^_ - Their Buildings — Their manner of Burials — The defectiveness of their Language, 451 CHAPTER X. The Author's Economy and happy Life among the Houyhnhnms — His great improvement in Virtue by conversing with them — Their Conversations — The Author has notice given him by his Master, that he must depart from the Country — He falls into a Swoon for grief, but submits — He contrives and finishes a Canoe by the help of a fellow-servant, and puts to Sea at a venture, . . 458 CHAPTER XL The Author's dangerous Voyage — He arrives at New Holland, hoping to settle there — Is wounded with an Arrow by one of the Natives — Is seized and carried by force into a Portuguese Ship— Thegreat civilities of the Captain — The Author arrives in England, . 467 CHAPTEE XII. The Author's Veracity — His design in publishing this Work — :His Censure of those Travellers who swerve from the truth — The Author clears himself from any sinister ends in Writing — An ob- jection answered— The method of planting Colonies — His native Country commended — The right of the Crown to those countries described by the Author isjustifled — The difficulty of conquering them — The Author takes his last leave of the Reader; proposes his manner of living for the future ; gives good advice, and con- cludes 477 BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE. "IIVES of Swift are so numerous that it may seem equally superfluous and presumptuous to add another to their number, especially as the dili- gence of former biographers has left few new materials to be collected, and scarcely any new conjectures to be hazarded. There is, however, j)erhaps, no person whose life is so full of interest and instruction to literary aspirants, so replete with encouragement to pursue a course of honorable industry, and so rife with examples of the perils that attend every abandonment of principle. Born in obscurity and almost in destitution — educated by the precarious charity of relations^-sent from his. university with no honor, and some disgrace — employed a.s .g£gi:ejtax.y by_,a .statesman _possessing_iia_^ati!2.niige, an^ yet epcacting more than the ordinary homage of a patr(3;n. Swift's early years exhibit nothing but the humiliation of genius, and the sickness of heart arising from hopes deferred. Yet, by steady exertion of talent he won his way forward, and at a remarkable jXjrisis saw himself courted and honored by all the leaders of parties, who divided the power of England. In the classic reign of Anne, wit and nobility shared public influence between them ; the pen of Addison was not less valuable to his party than the sword of Marlborough, and 2 ( 17 ) 18 BIOflRAPHICAL NOTICg. Bolingbroke most efRciently supported his cabinet in his study. A t the very moment that the "Whigs had " burned themselves while trying to roast a parson," and had lost the roiifidence of Queen and people, Swift, who had hithej'to been their vehement supporter, went over at once to the Tories, and assailed his old allies with all the mncor of a renegade. He became politically powerful, and morally powerless ; dreaded by all, -loved_iiy few, respected by none. Hie new patrons daridnot pay the price which he expected foi his desertion ; they shelved him in the deanery of St. Patrick, and ere long their removal from power seemed to consign him to hopeless obscurity. Having vainly tried to sell himself once more, Swift vowed vengeance on those who rejected his offer. A pro- posal for a copper coinage gave him an opportunity of convulsing his country ; he roused the passions of an excitable people by a system of audacious misrepresenta- tion, and was rewarded by an extent of popularity which at that time was unprecedented in Ireland. He had thus organized an immense power, capable of producing great results ; he employed it merely to harass an obnoxious ministry and to lacerate some semi-obscure individuals who had provoked his resentment. The power dwindled away from desuetude ; disappointed ambition nurtured a tendency to misanthropy which the feelings of depend- ence in earl'y life had formed, the mind yielded to the corrosion of the heart. And Swift expired, a changeling and a show. His private life was no less extraordinary. He felt the passion of love with the same force and keenness said to be experienced by Eastern guardians of the harem, and BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE. 19 like them he displayed all the acerbity and inconsistency incidental to their unfortunate position. At one time he spiritualized his passion to a more shadowy tenuity than had yet been attained in the dreams of Platonism ; and again, he passed into the wildest excesses of the opposite extreme, and wallowed in the filth of the most disgusting obscenity. Yet, three lovely and amiable women bestowed their aifections upon him ; and two were the victimsof his caprices and his selfishness. Unhappy himself, and the cause of unhappiness to those he loved most dearly, pri- vate life afforded the Dean no consolation for the disap- pointments of his public career ; if at one time he showed that true genius cannot be crushed by misfortune, at another he proved that fame can only be preserved by ■ continued exertion. His entire career teaclics that political influence is only valuable when beneficially extended, and that renown will never give comfort to the soul, unless the applause from without is seconded by self-approval from within. Jonathan Swift was descended from a younger branch of the Swift family in the county of York. His father was the sixth or seventh son of the Rev. Thomas Swift, vicar of Goderich, and was bred to the profession of an attorney. The extensive confiscations in Ireland consequent on the civil wars of 1641, and subsequently ratified by the Acts of Settlement and Explanation, had transferred a vast amount of'Irish property to English companies and land- owners, who were compelled to employ agents in the man- agement of their new estates. These agencies were very lucrative ; they laid the foundation of the fortunes of many families, such as that of the Beresfords, ^\'hich have since 20 BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE. been added to the ranks of the nobility. Swift, through the interest of some family connection obtained one of these profitable employments and removed to Dublin; but before he could derive much advantage from the employ- ment, he died, leaving a pregnant widow with very slender provision. Jonathan Swift, the child thus before birth deprived of a parent's care, was born in Dublin, at a small house in Iloey's Court, which is still shown by the residents in the neighborhood. The day of his birth was November 30th, 1667, an anniversary which, to the close of his life, he observed as a day of fasting and sadness, never failing to read the third chapter of the book of Job on each of its successive returns. Richard Brennan,* the servant in whose arms he died, stated that one of the few instances of 'a lucid interval during his fatal malady was a glimmer- ing consciousness of his birthday, which he showed by fre- quently repeating when it came round, "Let the day per- ish wherein I was born, and the night in which it was said there is a man-child conceived." Mrs. Swift was supported by her brother-in-law, God- win Swift, who undertook the education of his nephew; but while the boy was yet an infant, a singular event re- moved him for a time from the care of his uncle and mo- ther. The nurse -who had him in charge was a native of Whitehaven; on the death of a relation she succeeded to a small legacy, which required her presence in England; she was so fondly attached to the infant that she stole liim away from his mother, and carried him across the Channel. * Richard Brennan survived his master many years; a pension was paid hiin b)" Mr. G. M. Berkeley, through the hands of T. King, Sr., commissioner in London for the Irish courts of law ; and to his kindness I am indebted for this interesting anecdote. BIOSRAPHICAL NOTICE. 2l His delicate health, and the difficulty of procuring a pas- sage in those days, prevented his being sent hack for more than three years. When he returned to Dublin, it appeared that his nurse had taken extraordinary pains witli his edu- cation, for though barely five years of age, he could spell tolerably, and read a little in the Bible. At the age of six years. Swift was sent to the school of Kilkenny, a collegiate establishment founded by the Or- mond family, and always among the best regulated of the endowed schools of Ireland. A desk on which Swift carved his name with a penknife is still -hown to visitors at Kilkenny. In his fourteenth year Swift entered th e University of Dublin ; it appears from the registers that he entered as a pensioner under St. George Ashe, on the 24th of April, 1682. His cousin, Thomas Swift, entered at the same time, and the two Swifts appearing on the registers with- out their Christian names, created some confusion, which, however, has been in a great degree dispelled by the patient industry of the late Pr. Barrett. Swift's career as a student was not very creditable to him. He showed an invariable repugnance to logic, which was then the favored science, and a thorough contempt for the sophisms of Smiglecius, Keckermannus, and Burgers- dicius ; grave authorities in their day, but now scarcely known by name. From his neglect of collegiate studies Swift had no chance of obtaining honors ; he did not even acquire the limited information necessary to graduate, and only obtained his degree of Bachelor of Arts by special favor, a term used in Dublin to designate want of merit. Swift remained three years longer in the university, and formed one of a clique remarkable for their irregularities and breaches of collegiate discipline. Their disorders 22 BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE brouglit upon them the censure of the heads of tlie uni- versity, wliich tliey retorted by lampoons of more bitter- ness than wit. For one of these breaclies of decorum, Swift was severely admonished, and compelled to beg par- don of the dean, Dr. Allen, on his knees; this degradation was keenly felt, and more than twenty years afterwards Swift introduced a philippic against Dr. Allen into his attack on Lord Berkeley's administration of the Irish gov- ernment. Amid these follies. Swift formed a taste for the peculiar style of satire in which he subsequently became so famous. Before leaving college he showed his first sketch of the " Tale of a Tub " to Mr. Waring, his chum, or chamber-fellow, a gentleman with whose family he at one time designed to form a more tender connection. He be- came acquainted with his chum's sister. Miss Waring, and either fancied or formed an attachment, which circum- stances prevented him from disclosing at the time. On the death of his uncle Godwin, Swift was left with- out resources ; but another uncle, Dryden William Swift, came to his aid, and though he had not much in his power to bestow, ±he benevolence of his nature and the tender- ness of his manner enhanced the value of his gifts. The son of this kind uncle, Willoughby Swift, was a merchant in Lisbon, and generously contributed to the support of his cousin. Many years afterwards, the Dean of St. Pat- rick's used to relate an incident in his college life, of which Willoughby was the hero, with grateful acknowledgments of well-timed generosity. Ho was sitting despondingly in his rooms, contemplat- ing the college picture of misery — a scanty librarv, a naked board, and an empty purse — when his .attention was roused by some noise in the court; he looked out and ?aw a foreign-looking sailol- apparently inquiring his way BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE. 23 to the apartments of some student, and probably per- plexed by the waggeries for which the undergraduates of Dublin were long famous. It suddenly came into his head that this might possibly be the Ibearer of a message from his cousin Willoughby; no improbable conjecture, for Ireland had at the time a considerable foreign trade with Spain and Portugal. He immediately hastened down, and found that he had guessed aright. The stranger came with him to his room, produced a well-stocked purse, presented it as an offering from his cousin Willoughby, and refused to receive any portion of its contents as a reward. Under the circumstances in which Swift was placed, a small sum of money usually leads to extravagance, while the acquisition of a large sum generally leads to habits of economy, if not of parsimony. Such was the effect pro- duced on Swift ; he became very prudent in money mat- ters, and perhaps niggardly, a character which he main- tained to the end of his life. The year 1^88 was one of painful anxiety to Ireland ; the fate of the Protestant Church and of the forfeited estates hung in the balance. The success of James II would have given ascendency to the Latin Church, and the Irish lands to the heirs of the old proprietors ; nor was it at all clear that William III would not have made a compromise with the Irish party, as he at first offered, which would have closed the doors of preferment against English adventurers and their descendants. Swift saw the danger; he accordingly left Dublin,, and came over to England on a visit to his mother, who then resided in Leicestershire. Mrs. Swift, whose own means of support were precarious, could do nothing for her son, but she rec- ommended him to seek the advice and patronage of Sir 24 BIO(}RAPHICAL NOTtCfi. William Temple, who had married one of her relations Temple was a profound statesman, an accomplished scholar, and an experienced courtier ; he was not therefore likely to be prepossessed in favor of a raw Irish student, who was hitherto known only for his irregularities and his deficiency of information; he took Swift into his service, but for some time showed him no marks of confidence or affection. The two years, however, which the young man spent with Sir William Temple at Moor Park, laid the foundation of his future fortunes ; he became a diligent student, devoting eight hours every day to an extensive course of reading; but it is probable that he gained still more valuable information from the accomplished diplo- matist, who had taken an active share in all the important negotiations between the Restoration and the Revolution. Hence arises the marked difference between Swift's politi- cal pamphlets and those published by any other man of letters : they argue only on what appears on the public stage ; he, on the other hand, manifests an intimate famil- iarity with the machinery behind the scenes ; they wrote as spectators, he as an actor. His severe studies injured Swift's health ; a severe attack of indigestion brought on fits of giddiness united to deaf- ness, and he continued subject to them for the rest of his life. He was persuaded to try his native air, but deriving no benefit from a short visit to Dublin, he returned to Moor Park and resumed his studies. Temple introduced Swift to King William, who often came to visit the statesman in his retirement. The mon- arch was attended by Swift when he walked in the garden, but the only result from these interviews was the offer of a troop of horse, which the future Dean refused. King William, however, taua;ht Swift to eat asparagus in the . filOGRAPlIICAL UOTtCE. 25 Dutch way, tliat is, to eat both liead and stalk, a lesson not thrown away upon a person of his thrifty disposition. About this time Swift took his degree as Master of Arts at Oxford, and was treated there with a respect and atten- tion by which he was highly gratified. He paid annual visits to his mother, travelling on foot, and going at night to a penny lodging, where he purchased the luxury of clean sheets by an extra gratuity; he thus gratified his passion for witnessing vulgar life, and at the same time saved his money. Whenthe bLllior triennial parliaments was strong ly urged against jthejvirill^'.the court, Swift was sent to convey Sir William's recommendation to the King that the measure should be accepted. He was honored with an audience; but William III, who had his full share of Dutch obstinacy, disregarded Temple's remonstrances and the arguments by which his messenger supported them > the bill, by a strong exertion of ministerial influ- ence, was rejected in the House of Commons, and Swift, to the las^ hour ,of his life, used to dwell on the disappoint- ment and mortification produced by this failure. In time he began to grow weary of the dependent life he led at Moor Park, and solicited Temple to procure him some public employment. His request not being granted very speedily, he resigned his situation and returned to Ireland, resolved to enter the church, though with no higher hopes than the chaplaincy of the factory at Lisbon. The bishop to whom he applied for ordination required a certificate of his good conduct during his residence at Moor Park. It was not without great reluctance that he con- sented to ask any favor of his former patron ; when he did write, however, his letter opened the way for a reconciliation ; Sir William not only gave the required certificate, but recommended his former secretary so effectually to Lord 26 BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.. Capol, that Swift obtained the prebend of Kilroot, in the diocese of Connor, then worth more than a hundred a year, immediately after his admission to priest's orders. Under these cittiumstances he appears to have renewed^ rather than commenced his flirtation with Miss Waring, to whom he ailectedly gave the name of Varina. The court- .ship, so far as it can be traced, is supremely ridiculous ; while the lady was coy and cold nothing could equal the imjietuosity of the lover, but when, after a long resistance, she unexpectedly surrendered at discretion, the lover's ardor suddenly disappeared, the warm epistles to Varina were changed into a cold, formal letter to Miss Jane Waring, in which all her former objections to the match were studiously recapitulated, and it was hinted in terms which could not be misunderstood that the impatient suitor would be a very reluctant bridegroom. The lady with proper spirit broke off all intercourse, and Swifl was free to try his arts on a more unfortunate victim. He soon grew weary of the stagnation of Kilroot, espe- cially as his conduct seems not to have been in accordance with his sacred profession, but to have excited some scan- dal among the surrounding gentry. A constant tradition in the neighborhood records that he was charged with an indecent assault on a farmer's daughter, and that criminal informations were sworn against him before Mr. Dobbs, a neighboring magistrate. Sir William Temple was anxious to get back a secretary whose talents he had now begun to appreciate; he wrote urgent letters soliciting Swift's return to Moor Park, and promising to make strenuous efforts for his promotion. Whilst he still hesitated, he accidentally met a brother clergyman in one of his excursions, with whose appearance he was so struck that he formed his ac- quaintance. He learned that he was a curate " passino- BlOdRAPntCAL NCTICfi. 27 rich witli forty pounds a year," that he had to support a wife and eight children out of this miserable stipend, and that for want of interest he had no chance or expectation of promotion. No man was occasionally more capable of noble acts of benevolence than Swift ; he borrowed a favorite black horse from his new friend, posted up to Dub- lin, resigned his prebend to the Lord Deputy, and procured the succession for the meritorious curate. On Swift's re- turn he sought the clergyman, and informed him that he had been appointed to a benefice. Great was the poor curate's pleasure and astonishment, but greater was his sorrow, when he learned that he had been promoted at the expense of his generous friend. At first he peremptorily refused to accept the "prebend, and when his reluctant scruples were overcome he insisted that Swift should accept his famous black horse as a small token of his gratitude. Mounted for the first time on a horse of his' own, and with eighty pounds in his pocket. Swift departed from Kilroot on his road to England. The memory of his generosity to the curate is still preserved round Kilroot, where the favorite black horse is a popular sign. 11. When Swift resumed his post as secretary at Moor Park, .bright prospects seemed to be opening before him, but it was at this period that he laid the foundation of all his future misery, for during his second residence with Sir William Temple, he became acquainted with Miss Esther Johnson, better known under the poetic name of Stella. The best account of that unfortunate lady is contained in a letter addressed by her niece, Mrs. Hearn, to Mr. G. M. 28 BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE. Berkeley, whicli that gentleman published in his very scarce and entertaining volume of Literary Relics.* " Mrs. Esther Johnson, better known by the name of Stella, was born at Richmond, in Surrey, on the 13th of March, 1681. Her father was a merchant, and the younger brother of a good family in Nottinghamshire. He died young, and left his widow with three children, a son and two daughters. Whilst Mrs. Johnson lived at Richmond, she had the happiness of becoming first ac- quainted with Lady Gifford, the sister of Sir William Temple. The uncommon endowments both of body and mind which Mrs. Johnson certainly possessed in a high degree, soon gained her not only the esteem but the warm friendship of that excellent lady, a friendship which lasted till death. As they seldom were apart, and Lady Gifford lived much with her brother Sir William, it was through her that Mrs. Johnson and her two daughters (her son dying young) were brought to the knowledge and friend- ship of Sir William Temple and his lady ; who discovering so many excellences and such fine parts in the little Hetty, as she was always called in the Temple family, so far took upon themselves the care of her education as to bring her up with their own niece, the late Mrs. Temple, of Moor Park, by Farnham ; a most acceptable piece of kindness and friendship this to the mother, whose little portion had been greatly injured by the South Sea bubbles. And here it was that Dean Swift first became acquainted with Stella, and commenced that attachment which terminated in their marriage. The cause why that marriage was not owned to the world has never been thoroughly explained. It is the opinion, however, of her own family, that their finances not ■" For the use of tins volume the editor is indebted to T. King, Sr., Esq., commissioner in London for the Irish courts of law. BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE. ' 29 being equal to the style in which the Dean wished to move as a married man, could be . the only one ; Stella's own fortune being only £1500; £1000 of which, as a farther mark of friendship, was left by Sir William Temple him- self. It was Dean Swift's wish at last to have owned his marriage; but finding herself declining very fast, Stella did not choose to alter her mode of life, and besides, fully intended coming over to England to her mother." It has been said by those who have attempted Swift's vindication, that he only intended an innocent flirtation when he first made Stella's acquaintance, and they assign as a proof that he still continued to press Varina to con- sent to a marriage. This will, to most, appear an aggra- vation of his offence: no man has a right for his amuse- ment to trifle with the affections of a young and innocent female, to win a heart for the express purpose of breaking it, to stake his fictions against her realities, and when he had won by the counterfeit, triumph in the cheat and trample on the loser. During the four years of Swift's second residence at Moor Park, he began to appear before the world as a poet, by publishing a Pindaric Ode to Temple, to King William, and to the Athenian Society, " a knot of obscure men," says Dr. Johnson, " who published a periodical pamphlet of answers to the questions sent, or supposed to be sent, by letters." These- verses are of very inferior merit: it is said that when Dryden perused them, he declared to the mortified author, " Cousin Swift, you will never be a poet," and to this denunciation the perpetual malevolence which Swift manifested towards Dryden is generally attributed. It was probably during this period also that he wrote the "Tale of a Tub," and the "Battle of the Books," but they were not published until several years after. 30 BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE. I In 1699, Sir AVilliam Tcm])]e died, bequeathing Swift a considerable sum of money, and also his manuscripts, which he [jrobably deemed still more valuable. Before his death, Teniple obtained from King William a promise of the first prebend that should become vacant in Canterbury or West- minster for his secretary; that this promise might not be forgotten. Swift dedicated to the King the posthumous works with which he had been intrusted ; but neither the dedication nor Swift's reiterated applications could induce the monarch to perform his promise. Some time after- wards. Swift went over to Ireland with Lord Berkeley as his private secretary ; but soon after they reached Dublin, a person named Bush persuaded the Lord Justice that such a situation was unsuited to a clergyman, and obtained the office for himself. Nor was this his only mortification : the rich deanery of Derry became vacant, which Swift ex- pected to obtain, but through the influence of the secretary it was bestowed on somebody else, and Swift was dismissed with the livings of Laracor and Rathbeggin, in the county of Meath. At Laracor he increased the parochial duties by reading prayers on Wednesday and Friday ; as this was a novelty, few of tlie parishioners at first attended, and on one occa- sion, Roger the clerk formed the entire congregation. Swift, with unmoved gravity, began, "Dearly beloved Roger, the Scripture moveth you and me in sundry places," eta; and so went through the entire service. Notwith- standing this and some other instances of irreverence, which need not be recorded, he generally performed all the offices of his profession with great decency and exactness. Soon after his settlement at Laracor, he invited the un- fortunate Stella to Ireland, together with a Mrs. Dingley, whose presence it was hoped would prevent scandal. With BIOGKAPIIICAL NOTICE, 31 these ladies he passed his hours of relaxation, and to them he opened his bosom ; but they never resided in the same house, nor did he ever see them without a witness. They lived at the parsonage when Swift was away, and when he returned removed to a lodging, or to the house of a neigh- boring clergyman. Such a mode of life was necessarily painful to the lady, nor can there be any plausible defence made for withholding from her the name and station of a wife. Palliations of his conduct have been attempted by most of his biographers, but the circumstances on which they rely must to every person of proper feeling appear aggravations of his offence. Swift's iirst prose work was an Essay on the Dissensions in Athens and Rome, published in 1701, when the author had attained his thirty-fourth year. On its first appearance it was genei'ally attributed to Bishop Burnet, a circumstance which by no means flattered the pride of the author. Three years afterwards was published the "Tale of a Tub," a work which he never directly owned, and never distinctly denied. " Charity," says Dr. Johnson, " may be persuaded to think that such a work might be written by a man of peculiar character, without ill attention, but it is of dan- gerous example." Although superstition and fanaticism are fairly open to ridicule, and indeed can scarcely be at- tacked with any other weapon, because they defy argument and are unassailable by learning, yet there arc certain limits, beyond which the use of such a weapon is criminal. The " Tale of a Tub " in many passages outrages common de- cency, and in the Essay on the Operations of the Spirit the author has indulged in imjjious blasphemy against articles of faith recognized in every Christian church. Some have claimed pardon for the book, because the Es- tablished Church, considered as an institution, is every- 32 BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE. where mentioned with reverence; but the creed of a church is not less important than its establishment, and Swift's ridicule was not unfrequently, though unconsciously, di- rected against doctrines which the Anglican formularies have placed among the essentials of Christianity. The digressions relating to Wotton and Bentley display an equal want of knowledge and integrity ; Swift did not understand the controversies, and he misrepresented them at random. Posterity lias long ago decided between wit and truth; Bentley has received his due honor from scholars, and his opponents are forgotten. The Battle of the Books is said by Dr. Johnson to be an imitation of the French Combat des Idvres : there is no use in discussing the question of originality, for both the French and English works have been long since consigned to unhonored oblivion. In the year 1708 he published the "Sentiments of a Church of England Man," a " Ridicule of Astrology," an " Argument against abolishing Christianity," and a " De- fence of the Sacramental Test." The " Argument against abolishing Christianity" is far the best of these works; it is written in a vein of happy irony, and exposes with just severity the miserable vanity of those infidels who hope to acquire fame by an affectation of singularity, and whase notions of glory are not unlike those of the incendiary of the temple of Ephesus. In the year following, he pub- lished a " Project for the Advancement of Religion," which, like most such projects, is quite impracticable. C At this time Swift was a zealous Whig, and wrote several J pamphlets and poctjcal squibs to support his party j few of "^ these can now be traced, for the author was subsequently very anxious to efface all recollection of them. One of V them, " Merlin's Prophecy," designed to flatter the~^Dul:e of Marlborough, and encourage the English people to per- BIOGRAPHIGAL NOTICE. 33 severe iiLthiiiEiULagaiiisO]i3jice,. possesses more merit than is usual in such productions, and it presents, moreover, a curious contrast to the opinions maintained in Swift's sub- sequent writings. Merlin's Prophecy. 1709. Seven and ten addyd to nine, Of Fraunce her woe this is the sygne ; Tamys rivers trOys y-frozen ;* "Waike sans wetyng shoes ne hozen. Then comyth foorthe ich understonde Prom towne of Stoffe to fattyn londe.f An hardie chieftan, woe the morne, To Praunce that evere he was born. Then shall the fyshe hewaylo his bossefj Nor shall grim berrys§ malined her executors to polish the poem of Xladfinus and Vanessa, in which the "Dean had avowed his love, and also several of his. warmest letters. Bishop Berkeley, one of Swift's most intim'ate friends, was appointed the executioner of her 48 BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE. vengeance ; lie published the poem with great ruluctance, but he withheld the letters, for reasons sufficiently obvious to all who have read the portion of this correspondence which has since appeared. The effect produced by the appearance of the poem, both on Swift and Stella, was very great. The Dean went on a tour through the south of Ireland for two months, both to banish unpleasant reflections and to give time for cal- umny to subside. Stella went to the house of a friend in the country, where, in a few weeks, she recovered her usual equanimity. During one of his occasional trips to England, Swift is said to have waited on Sir Robert Walpole, and to have made overtures to that minister. In the course of conver- sation Swift pointed to some ivy, and said, " I am like that ivy ; I want support." " Why, then, did you attach your- self to a falling wall?" was the minister's witty rejoinder. The Dean saw that there was no hope, and took his leave ; but thenceforward he cherished the most bitter animosity against Walpole. In the notes on the character of Flim- nap, in the Voyage to Lilliput, some of Swift's attacks on the premier are pointed out ; it deserves to be added, that they amused Walpole just as much as they did other people. In the year 1724 great complaints were made of a scar- city of copper coinage in Ireland ; to remedy the inconve- nieince a patent was granted to Wood, a manufacturer of Wolverhampton, authorizing him to coin one hundred and eighty thousand pounds' worth of half-pence and farthings for the kingdoui of Ireland. The coins sent over by Wood were of a debased metal, and Swift wrote a series of letters under the signature of a Drapier, showing the folly of re- ceiving, and the mischief that must ensue from giving. BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE. 49 gold and silver for coin not worth a third jiart of its nominal value. The nation became alarmed ; addresses against the patent were voted by the Irish Parliament and most of the civic corporations. The grand jury of the county of Dublin presented, as enemies to their country, all who should attempt to. put the coin into circulation: and it was almost universally stigmatized by the magis- trates and gentlemen assembled at the quarter sessions throughout the country. The British Privy Council pub- lished a report in favor of the coin, and severely con- demned the address of the Irish Parliament. But the popular clamor was too great and too general to be re- sisted, and on the recommendation of Archbishop Boulter the patent was revoked in the folloM'ing year. WhateA'er may have been Swift's motives, and of their purity reason- able doubts may be entertained, it is unquestionable that on this occasion he effected great good, not by upsetting Wood's patent, which in fact was not. injurious to the country, but by showing, the Irish what could be. effected by turning from party politics to a national object. Tliis publication gave serious atinoyance to the govern- ment; a proclamation was issued, offering a reward of three hundred pounds for the discoverj^^^ofjhe author ; Harding, the printer, was"aTrested7Eutthe indictment pre- ferred against him was ignored by the grand jury. Swift subsequently waited on the Lord-lieutenant Carteret, a nobleman of great politeness and liberality, and remon- strated against the severe measures which the government had adopted. Carteret replied by an appropriate quotation > from Virgil : Kes durae et regni novitas me talia cogunt Moliri, 4 50 BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE. Whenever Swift's life appeared most fraught with enjoy- ment, some fatal shock seemed prejjaring for his domestic misery. In the very midst of the Drapier's popularity, Stella's health began visibly to decline. The Dean was in England when she was first attacked, preparing to pay a visit to Lord Bolingbi-oke, then an exile in France ; the calamity brought him back to Ireland, where his pres- ence for a time restored Stella to imperfect health. He then came back to England, and in conjunction with Pope, published three volumes of Miscellanies. In the year 1727, Gulliver's Travels appeared, and were hailed with a mixture of merriment and amazement, which at once stamped their popularity. Some contemporary critics accused him of having imitated Defoe; and the charge has been often repeated. ]Vo doubt, there are many striking points of resemblance between the two great fic- tions of these authors, especially in the air of truth Avhich the recital of miwite and apparently trifling circumstances gives to their narratives; but while Defoe strictly confines himself to romantic adventure. Swift takes the higher aim of philosophic satire, and seems to consider the incidents of his story as secondary considerations. Several foreign critics have expressed surprise at the absence of all allusion to Defoe and his works in Swift's productions. There is not, however, any part of Gulli- ver's Travels in which such a reference appears necessary, 'or even expedient ; and if there M'ere, it must still be re- membered that Swift and Defoe were at the opposite poles in politics, and that nothing in England is so rare or so ]3erilous as j ustice to a party opponent. Even in the pres- (Mit day, were a Tory to express admiration of Moore's witty Lyrics, the cry of deserter would be raised by his friends ; or if a Whig paid due homage to Southey, the BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE. 51 world would look for his speedy enrolment in the Carlton C\v^. la Swift's days, the parties actually contended for life and death; Oxford and Orford risked the penalties of treason in their respective administrations ; their followers looked upon their rivals, not as opponents to be vanquished, but as enemies to be exterminated. This has long been the source of great intellectual evil in England, but per- haps political injustice is a portion of the tax that must be paid for political liberty. III. Gulliver's Travels were not published until after Swift's return to Ireland. They appeared with an affected mys- tery, of whick the Dean was very fond, and which even his most intimate friends were conjpelled to respect. Pope, Arbuthnot, and Gay so far humored his caprice as to write dubiously respecting the author, though the two former must have known that such a work was projected long before. There was, however, a, reason for this con- cealment, of which, in the present day, we can form no very adequate notion. Walpole was so enraged by the Drapier's Letters, that he threatened to arrest Swift; the Irish people formed voluntary associations for the Dean's defence, and the minister was dissuaded from his design by a judicious friend, who inquired whether he had ten thousand men ready to escort the messenger charged with the execution of the warrant? A new and more bitter attack on the administration seemed likely to awake the slumbering vengeance of the Premier, and the recent im- peachment of Bishop Atterbury had shown that he would not be scrupulous in the use of intercepted correspondence. Few works have had greater success on their first ap- 52 BI09RAPHICAL NOTICE. pearance than Gulliver's Travels ; and there are fc^^^er to whose merits posterity has rendered more subsfantial^jus- tice. This is not the place for entering upon the examina- tion of its substantial deserts ; but it is of some importance to examine how it was viewed by contemporaries. The Voyage to Lilliput is an exposure of the policy of the English court during the reign of George 1. Swift and his friends were persuaded that the treaty of Utrecht hadbeen ^the salvation of Great Britain, that it had espe- cially secured our naval supremacy, and eifectually pre- vented France from rivalling us at sea. He therefore re- garded the impeachment of Oxford, and the banishment of Bolingbroke, as gross acts of national injustice, attribut- able chiefly to the ambition and jealousy of Walpole, whom he stigmatizes under the name of Flimnap. The raoPG' minute political allusions are pointed out in the notes; it will be more convenient here to confine attention to gen- eralities. Walpole had many enemies, even in the nomi- nal Whig party, who professed themselves adherents to the Prince of Wales ; these persons, aware that they could not of themselves form an administration, projected a coalition with the Tories, or as they called them, the party of the country gentlemen. In- the language of the day, they hoped to form a " broad-bottom ministry ;" they affected to describe the differences between the parties in principle as very trifling, not greater than that between the high-heds and low-heek of Lilliput ; and as appeals had been made to religious prejudices, they represented the controversy between the Latin and English churches as not more im- portant than that between the Big-endians and the Little- endians. Projects for something like a union between the churches were not unfrequcntly made at the tinis, and the chances of success for a season, seemed far from desperate. BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE. 53 riie Prince of Wales, afterwards George II, was believed not to be indisposed to a union of parties, as is intimated by the heir-apparent of Lilliput wearing one shoe with a high, and the other with a low heel. All these expectations were disappointed ; but when the Travels appeared, they were rife in every political circle, and the nation generally -looked- for great advantages from their realization. The political vifiws, advocated^ in LiUiput/jvere therefore gen- erally -Popular; they gratified the entire body of the To- ries, the diacoiitented section of the Whigs, and the great multitude which in every free state looks for Utopian advantages from the mere fact of change. In Brobdingnag, the satire takes a wider range ; the ob- ject of assault is changed from the tactics of a party to the general system of policy : like Bolingbroke, Swift attempts to sketch the ideal character of a patriot king, and an effi- cient system of government. T he fiction is very h appily s uited to this dp.sign : the opinions which beings of a refiec t- iye and ph ilosophic character, endowed with immense for ce, ^"''^ ''"^^ilJlL^^^ -"^ t;lii'?iJMitTis"P« ^"d sfia pdals of a E u- ropean co urt, are developed with exquisite skill . It is man Viewm fr the poii'tica.1 sgnahhlps nf an ant-hilT^ nr Gul- liver himself e stimating the court of Lilliput . The po- ITtical prmciples advocated in the Voyage to Brobdingnag were the same as those which the Tory party supported in Parliament. From the imperfection of the parliamentary reports in these days, and from the influence of the cry of Jacobitisfti, with which the Whig leaders assailed their op- ponents, we have only very imperfect specimens of the elo- quence of Shippen, Windham, St. Aubin, etc.; but even the fragments which have been preserved prove that the Tory party in the reign of George I was highly respect- able in character, talent, and fearless advocacy of principle. 54 BIOGRAPBICAL NOTICE. The contrast between Gulliver's position in Brobding- nag and Lilliput is very happily conceived, and it lends singular force to the more general application of the satire. The o nly special attack in the Yoyage to Brobdingna SLis directed agains t the maids of honor, for whom, as Dr. J)e- lany informs us, Swift h ad no great veneration . It was to the influence of theTa3fr^"SThe court that he attributed Archbishop Sharpe's success in preventing him from getting a bishopric ; and he suspected that, notwithstanding all his flatteries, Mrs. Masham was far from anxious to effect a change in his favor in the mind of Queen Anne. The Voyage to Laputa was the least relished, because it was the least understood at the time of its publication. The pursuits of the inhabitants of the Flying Island were designed to ridicule the proceedings of the Royal Society, a body which had previously come under the lash of the author of Hudibras. Sir Isaac Newton had provoked the Dean's resentment, by giving his opinions as master of the mint in favor of Wood's copper coinage; and it was prob- ably the absence of mind for which that philosopher was notorious which suggested the whimsical notion of the Flapper as an attendant upon the Lapntians. Swift had no taste for music; in his own words, he could find no dif- ference "'twixt tweedledum and tweedledee;" he therefore deemed the passion for music, and especially the general admiration of Handel which prevailed in his day, as a legitimate object of satire. His attack on the musicians is, however, a greater failure than that on the philosophers, for he was too ignorant of the science to discover the points most open to assault. In the College of Projections, he was more successful; during the rage of speculation, which rose at the time of the South Sea Scheme, proposals to the full as absurd as any Swift has described were rife, and BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE. 55 joint-stock companies formed for their execution. Some of tliese will be found mentioned in the notes, and those who remember the years 1825 and 1826 will be at no loss to supply parallels. It was generally felt that the scenes with the ghosts at Glubbdubdrib were decided failures, and posterity has not reversed this judgment. The melancholy description of the Struldbruggs appears to have been writ- ten with too correct an anticipation of the calamitous end of Swift's own life ; it is written with the same feeling that dictated his exclamation to Dr. Young when they passed a withered oak, " I am like that tree, I shall die at top." The most unpopular of the voyages with the generality of readers was that of the Houyhnhnms; its misanthropy is repulsive, and almost disgusting ; miserable indeed must be the condition of a man who can derive pleasure from a satire against humanity. But as Sir'Walter Scott has well observed, the jtate of society at^that. time in TrelaadLw^ well calculated to inspirg_ the worst opinions of human natijre] Swift ha d befo re_iu]XL-^i^-feetitnnr-of"petty tyraiTts and a nation of tcampled-slaves^he-^>eTraHa;ws, tioftes remarl{ableJor_th.eii:-absurdity ihan their iniquity, seemed- as~if the JWtj: of the qgngndpni^y rpgrn-ded pprapnntinn fis n. toy or plaything, and made human suffering an unhuman sportT But there were other causes that tended to strengthen and develop this morbid tendency to misanthropy ; Vanessa had sunk into an early grave, Stella was fast following her; two tender and affectionate hearts were his victims; all his ambitious projects were blighted, and a disease, the most afflicting to which humanity is exposed, had given premonitory warnings of its near approach. It was such circumstances that generated the gloomy feelings under which the character of the Yahoos was drawn. But dis- g usting asj.be picture is. it stjlLcamceyaan important moral 66 BIOGRAPHICAL NODlCfi. lessonj it i s a probable delin eat ion of what humanity m ight Become ifexposed to the brutalizing influences of ignor ance and unregulated jiassions ; i t pictur^_ib e triumph of oe a- sualit y overTntelligen ce, an d consequently sets forth i n the strongest lig;ht the necessity of mor al train ing and reli gious instruction. There was in Swift's day a large class of dis- appointed politicians, who, like him, sought consolation in misanthropy. His old enemy, the Ducliess of Marlborough, who had long outlived her power, but never lost the love of it, expressed her ^yarm delight with the account 'of the Yahoos, and proclaimed Swift the only accurate delineator of human nature. ^ The general narrative was not less agreeable to the mass of readers than the satire to particular classes of politiciAns. Gulliver's character is so thoroughly natural, so completely that of the English sailor of his day, that many were dis- posed to hail him as a personal acquaintance. A naval man at the time used to assert that he knew Captain Gulliver very well, but that he lived at "Wapping, and not at Roth-, erhithe. The fame of Gulliver was not confined to Britain; it spread rapidly through Europe. Voltaire, who was then in England, warmly recommended it to his friends in France, and advised them to have it translated. The task was undertaken by L'Abbe Desfontaines, who was, how- ever, afraid to give a literal version of Swift's bold opin- ions. He remodelled the work in order to adapt it to French taste, and it is no unamusing task to compare his translation with the original, as an example of the differ- ences in the style and habits of thought between the Au- gustan age of England and that of France. The Abbe published al'^o a new Gulliver, which is utterly unreadable; the same may be said of the continuation of Gulliver's BIOGRAPaiCAL NOTICE. 67 Travels which appeared in England; it was at once an impudent forgery and a miserable plagiarism from a French book not worth robbing; it dropped, iiowever, "stillborn" from the press. IV. Fortune appeared once more to shine on Swift, when Gulliver's Travels were published. Congratulatory and complimentary letters were sent to him from the Court of the Prince of Wales ; the Princess and the Prince's mis- tress, who lived in anomalous concord, both joined in these honors, and the Dean had hopes that a new reign would open the door of promotion. He sent the Princess a dress of Irish manufacture — a poplin, which for the last century has been the chief glory of the Irish loom. Caroline, in return, promised him a collection of medals, which she never sent. Mrs. Howard, the Prince's mistress, sent the Dean a ring, in return for which he transmitted her a little golden crown, which was designed to represent the diadem of the Queen of Lilliput. In the midst of these encouraging circumstances, Stella died, and Swift's domestic happiness, such as it was, ended forever. About the same time, George I died, and George IT, to the surprise of every- body, continued Walpole at the head of the administration. Swift made some efforts to preserve his favor with Queen Caroline, but the Queen had forgotten the promises of the Princessj He clung still longer to the hopes he entertained of promotion through the influence of Mrs. Howard; but George II was governed by his wife, not by his mistresses, and atoned for his conjugal infidelity by permitting the Queen to regulate all the affairs of state. The Dean at length discovered tliat all his axertions were vain; he re- 5S felOGtRAPHICAL NOTICEl. turned to Ireland just before the death of Stella, and nevef again visited England. From time to time, Swift wroteoccasional pamphlets on Irish policy, which served to maintain his influence with the public ; but in private, the circle of his acquaintance became daily more contracted, and few were admitted to his table who did not submit to his caprices and administer large doses of flattery to his pride. His favorite maxim became " Vive la bagatelle," and it is probable that he found trifles necessary to life. His petty amusements gave employment to a mind which could not be idle, but whicii sickness and sorrow incapacitated for steady exertion. As years advanced, his fits of giddiness and deafness became more frequent, and the acerbity of his temper increased in the same proportion. He still preserved the talent for minute observation, of which he had made such good use in Gulliver, and gave a remarkable instance of it in his " Polite Conversation," and his " Directions to Servants," the latter of which, however, was not published until after his death. In 1736, while writing the " Legion Club," a bitter larapoon on the Irish House of Commons,- he was seized with a fit of giddiness so severe and so long-continued that he never after ventured to attempt any work of thought or labor. In 1741 his mental condition was such that it became necessary to appoint legal guardians of his person and property. A short interval of reason ensued in the following year, but the hopes to which it gave rise were soon dispelled; in a few days he sunk into a state of lethargic stupidity, motionless, heedless, and speechless. Richard Brennan, the servant who attended him in his last illness, and in whose arms he expired, used to relate tliat wliilst the power of speech remained, he continued constant in the performance of his private devotions, and BlOallAPHICAL NOTICE. 59 in proportion as his memory failed, they were gradually shortened, until at last he could only repeat the Lord's Prayer; which, however, he continued to do until the power of utterance forever ceased. His death was tran- quil. " He went off/' said Brennan, " like the snuff of a candle." He bequeathed his jDroperty to found a hospital for idiots and lunatics ; in his own words, — He gave .the little wealth he had To build a house for fools and mad ; To show by one satiric touch, No nation wanted it so much. Mr. G. M. Berkeley declares that there were only four authentic portraits of Swift, of which that preserved as a kind of heirloom in the deanery of St. Patrick's is the most faithful. A copy of it adorns the Dining Hall in Trinity College, Dublin, and represents a countenance strongly marked with grief, indignation, and benevolence. He was tall, robust, and well inade, his complexion was rather dark, his eyes were blue and very expressive, his eyebrows dark and heavy, his nose inclined to aquiline, his lips slightly curled upwards. In his youth he was considered handsome, and in the decline of life his figure is universally described as noble and imposing. He was a very fluent speaker, ready at retort and reply, never thrown off his centre by the unexpected attack of an as- sailant. This talent would have rendered him a formid- able auxiliary if the Tories had given him a seat on the episcopal bench, in the English House of Peers, at a time when, with the exception of Atterbnry, there was not an English prelate calculated to shine in debates. The sue- 60 BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE. cessive lords-lieutenant of Ireland dreaded his tongue as much as his pen; and all of them, from the amiable Carteret to the haughty Dorset, sought to disarm his hos- tility by paying homage to his genius. All his biographers dwell ou the charms of Swift's con- versation ; the originality of his humor, which was some- times carried too far, at first appeared startling, but when managed with the skill which Swift could exert when he jjleased, it rendered him a companion whose society was everywhere sought. He delighted in relating anecdotes, which his exquisite touches of satire rendered irresistibly amusing, while his keenness of observation made them not less instructive. He took great delight in puns, and was the author of some of the best that exist ; for instance, his application of a line from Virgil to the lady who swept down a Cremona fiddle with her mantle : Mantua, V£e! nimiura misers vicina Crenionse. His singularity of expression was manifested on some extraordinary occasions ; when he introduced Bishop Berke- ley to Lord Berkeley of Stratton, he made use of these words, " My lord, here is a relation of your lordship's who is good for something, and that, as times go, is saying a great deal." One day, when travelling in the south of Ireland, he stopped to give his horse water at a brook which crossed the road; a gentleman of the neighborhood halted for the same purpose, and saluted him, a courtesy which the Dean returned. They parted, but the gentleman, struck by the Dean's figure, sent his servant to inquire who the Dean was ; the messenger first made application to the Dean's attendant, who was an original in his own way, and he referred the man to his master. The messenger rode up ^lOSRAPHICAL NOTICE. 61 to the Dean, and said, "Please sir, master would be obliged if you would tell him who you are?" "Wil- lingly," replied the Dean; "tell your master I am the person that bowed to him w];ien we wera giving our horses water at the brook yonder." The Irish aristocracy had little favor with Swift.; he keenly assailed their jobbing propensities, particularly in the management of roads and bridges ; he assailed one with mock praise, declaring. So great was his bounty, He erected a bridge at the cost of the county. Another worthy had taken for his motto Eqii£s hand male notus, which Swift, with equal wit and truth, translated, "Better known than trusted." Chief Justice Whitshead's motto was made the subject of a stinging epigram : lABertas et natale solum — Fine words 1 I wonder where you stole 'em ; Could nothing but your chief reproach Serve for the motto of your coach ? He had an extraordinary talent for extempore rhymes. An innkeeper who wished to add the king's head to his old sign of the bell, asked for a motto which might recon- cile such an anomaly. Swift gave him. May the king live long ; Dong ding, ding dong. After the publication of the Drapier's Letters he became so popular that he was always followed by a crowd when- ever he appeared in the streets of Dublin. He used fre- quently, to say that the Irish ought to subscribe and pur- 62 BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE. fliaso hi ma stock of Jiats, for that his own was worn out by the number of sahites he had to return. Many apocryphal anecdotes are related of his interchange of slang with the shoeblacks and beggars of Dublin, a race remarkable for their readiness in repartee; but it has hap- l)ened to Swift as to other celebrated jesters, to be accounted ihe author of every joke, good and bad, perpetrated in his (lay, and few of the jokes, preserved by tradition are worthy of being repeated. His epigrams and lampoons display a ready and caustic wit. No man was more ready in "the amber immortal- ization" of an enemy; the name of the unlucky offender, however unrhythmical, " slides into verse and hitches in his rhyme," where it continues gibbeted, for the mockery of all future generations. The best example of this skill is the epigram on Whiston and Ditton, which, however, can- not be quoted; next to it, perhaps, may be ranked the no- tice of Bcttesworth, a sergeant at law, who had provoked the Dean's hostility by attacking the privileges of the clergy : Thas at the bar the booby Bettesworth, Though half a crown o'erpays his sweat's worth, Who knows in law, nor text, nor margent, Calls Singleton his brother sergeant. W hen the poem of which these lines form a part was first published, it was brought wet from the press to a com- ])aiiy in which Bettesworth was present. The sergeant was asked to read it, and when he came to the lines reflectinsr on himself, he started up and vowed that he would take deadly revenge. lie haated to the deanery and, forcing his way to Swift's presence, said, " Sir, I am Sergeant Bettes- worth," The Dean, with a most innocent face, asked, BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE. 63 "Of what regiment, pray?" Bettesworth, still more en- raged, demanded, "Are you the author of this paper?" Swift, with great coolness, answered, " JNtr. Bettesworth, I was, in my youth, acquainted with great lawyers, who, knowing my disposition to satire, advised me if any sooun- drel or blockhead \vhom I had lampooned should ask me such a question as yOu have put, that I should deny the authorship, and I therefore tell you that I am not the au- thor of these lines." Bettesworth blustered, but could get no further satisfaction; at last he went off, saying, "Mr. Dean, you are like one of your own Yahoos; you have clambered to a place of security whence you can gratify your vindictive temper by pelting filth at your betters." As Bettesworth continued to threaten violent and corporal revenge, the inhabitants of St. Patrick's district formed an association for the Dean's defence, and the unfortunate lawyer could scarcely venture to appear in the streets. He subsequently declared in Parliament that Swift's satire had deprived him of more than twelve hundred pounds a year. An epigram was the last composition of Swift, and almost his last symptom of rationality. During a brief lucid interval he was taken out for a drive by his physi- cian ; as . they passed through the park Svvift remarked a new building which he had never seen before, and asked what it was. The physician replied, " That, Mr. Dean, is the magazine of arms and powder, for the security of the city." " O, ho !" said the Dean, pulling out his pocket- book, " let me take an item of that, this is worth remark- ing ; ' my tablets,' as Harulet says, ' my tablets, memory put down that.' " Pie then produced the following lines, the last which he ever wrote : 64 BIOGfRAPHICAL NOTICE. Behold a proof of Irish sense 1 Here Irish wit is seen I When nothing's left that's worth defence, We build a magazine. The greatest difficulty in the analysis of Swift's literary character is to discover by what depravity of intellect he acquired a taste for loathsome and filthy ideas, from which every other mind shrinks with disgust. " The ideas of pleasure," says Dr. Johnson, "even when criminal, may solicit the imagination ; but what has disease, deformity, and filth upon which the thoughts can be allowed to dwell?" The answer is not easy; physicians, however, have frequently found such a morbid perversion of the intellect connected with physiological defects ; the obliquity appears to have been constitutional with Swift ; it is found in his earliest as well as his latest works, but it becomes most offensive when the symptoms of his last lamentable disease began to manifest themselves. Few political writers could boast of such triumphs. In the reign of Queen Anne, he turned the stream of popu- larity against the Whigs, and must be confessed to have guided for a time the entire mass of public opinion in Eng- land. In the ensuing reign he became the tribune of the Irish people, and their political dictator. Supported only by a trampled and oppressed nation, he bade defiance to the crown, the bench, and the Parliament, " and showed that wit confederated with truth has such force as author- ity is unable to resist." To use the words of Dr. Johnson, " He said truly of himself, that Ireland teas his debtor. It^ was from the time that he first began to patronize the Irish that they may date their riches and prosperity. He taught them iirst to know their own interest, their weight, and their strength, and gave them spirit to assert that equality BIOORAPHICAL NOTICE. 65 with their fellow-subjects to which they have ever since been making vigorous advances, and to claim those rights which they have at last established. Nor can they be charged with ingratitude to their benefactor, for they rev- erenced him as a guardian and obeyed liim as a dictator." Swift's memory is still revered in Ireland, and especially in Dublin ; men of every party confess that he gave the first impulse to the exertions made for constitutional free- dom, and the consequent^developm'ent of a manu&cturing industry. His exertions of themselves were not, perhaps, of great moment, but they were all-important as examples. There was" in his character much to condemn, but there was also much to admire; very inferior deserts may secure popularity for a day, substantial merit can alone embalm a memory in the heart of a nation : Then be his failings cover'd by his tomb, And guardian laurels o'er his ashes bloom. THE PUBLISHER TO THE READER. ■^ s^^ >]EMUEL GULLIVER, the author of these Travels, is my aucient and intimate friend ; there is likewise some relation between us on the mother's side. About three years ago, Mr. Gul- liver, growing weary of the concourse of curious people coming to him at his house in Redriff, made a small pur- chase of land, with a convenient house, near Newark in Nottinghamshire, his native county, where he now lives retired, yet in good esteem among his neighbors. Although Mr. Gulliver was born in Nottinghamshire,, where his father dwelt, yet I have heard him say his family came from Oxfordshire; to confirm which, I have observed in the churchyard at Banbury in that county, several tombs and monuments of the Gullivers. Before be quitted Red- riff, he left the custody of the following papers in my hands, with the liberty to dispose of them as I should think fit. I have carefully perused them three times. The style is very plain and simple ; and the only fault I find is, that the author, after the manner of travellers, is a little too circumstantial. There is an air of truth apparent through- out the whole ; and, indeed, the author was so distinguished for his veracity, that it became a sort of proverb among his neighbors at Redriff, when any one affirmed a thing, to say, "It was as true as if Mr. Gulliver had spoken it." ( 67 ) 68 THE PUBLISHER TO THE READER. By the advice of several worthy persons, to whom, with the author's permission, I communicated tliese jiapers, I now venture to send them into the world, hoping they may be, at least for some time, a better entertainment to our young noblemen than the common scribbles of politics and party. This volume would have been at least twice as large, if I had not made bold to strike out innumerable passages relating to the winds and tides, as well as to the variations and bearings in the several voyages, together with the minute descriptions of the management of the ship in storms, in the style of sailors; likewise the account of lon- gitudes and latitudes; wherein I have reason to apprehend that Mr. Gulliver, may be a little dissatisfied: but I was resolved to fit the work as much as possible to the general capacity of readers. However, if my own ignorance in sea affairs shall have led me to commit some mistakes, I alone am answerable for them; and if any traveller has a curi- -osity to see the whole work at large, as it came from the hands of the author, I will be ready to gratify him. As for any further particulars relating to the author, the reader will receive satisfaction from the first page of the book. ElCHARD SyMPSON. A LETTER PROM CAPTAIN GULLIVER TO HIS COUSIN SYMPSON. WRITTEN IN THE YEAR 1727. HOPE you will be ready to OAvn publicly, whenever you shall be called to it, that, by your great and frequent urgency, you prevailed on me to publish a very loose and uncorrect account of my travels, with direction to hire some young gentleman of either university to put them in order, and correct the style, as my cousin Dampier did by my advice, in his book called " A Voyage Round the World." But I do not remember I gave you power to consent that anything should be omitted, and much less that anything should be inserted; therefore, as to the latter, I do here renounce everything of that kind, particularly a paragraph about her majesty Queen Anne, of most pious and glorious memory^ although I did reverence and esteem her more than any of human species. But you, or your interpo- lator, ought to have considered, that as it was not my in- clination, so it was not decent to praise any animal of our composition before my master Hauyhnhnm ; and, besides, I 69 ^ 70 A LETTER FROM GtJLLlVEB the fact was altogether false; for to my knowledge, being in England during some part of her majesty's reign, she did govern by a chief minister; nay, even by two succes- sively, the first whereof was the lord of Godolphin, and the second the lord of Oxford ; so that you have made me say the thing that was not. Likewise, in the account of the academy of projectors, and several passages of my discourse to my master Houyhnhnm, you have either omitted some material circumstances, or minced or changed them in such a manner, that I do hardly know my own work. When I formerly hinted to you something of this in a letter, you were pleased to answer, " That you^ were afraid of giving offence ; that people in power were very Avatchful over the press, and apt not only to interpret, but to punish everything which looked like an innuendo" (as I think you call it). But, pray, how could that which I spoke so many years ago, and at above five thousand leagues distance, in another reign, be applied to any of the Yalioos who now are said to govern the herd ; especially at a time when I little thought or feared the unhappi- ness of living under them ? Have not I the most reason to complain, when I see these very Yalioos carrieinid apprentice to Mr. James Bates, an eminent surgeon in Ijondon, with projects he returned to benefit his own dear country; but had the misfortune to find them rejected by the envious ministers of Queer Anne, and himself sent treacherously away. "And hence it is that in his fourth voyage he discovers a vein of melancholy, proceeding almost to a disgust of his species ; but above all, a mortal detestation of the whole flagitious race of ministers, and a final resolution not to give in any memorial to the Secretary of State, in order to subject the lands he discovered to the crown of Great Britain. " Now, if by these hints the reader can help himself to a farther dis- covery of the nature and contents of these travels, he is welcome to as much light as they afford him : I am obliged by all the ties of honor, not to speak more openly." Pope, however, appears to have been displeased at the substitution of Lemuel Gulliver for Martinus Scriblerus ; he adds rather ill-na- turedly : " But if any man shall see such very extraordinary voyages, which manifest the most distinguishing marks of a philosopher, » politician, and a legislator, and can imagine them to belong to a surgeon of a ship, or a captain of a merchantman, let him remain in his ignorance." Swift himself thus announces the approaching appearance of the work in a letter to Pope, dated Dublin, September 29th, 1725: "I have employed my time (besides ditching) in finishing, correcting, amending, and transcribing my Travels, in four parts complete, newly augmented, and intended for the press when the world shall deserve them, or rather when a printer shall be found bold enough to venture his ears." The existence of a nation of pigmies was firmly believed in ancient times. The diminutive race is mentioned by Herodotus, Aristotle, Pliny, and even by some of the earlier modern travellers. The fol- lowing account is from Ctesias, who was contemporary with Xeno- phon : " In the middle of India there are black men called pigmies, using the same language as the other Indians; they are very little, the tallest of them being but two cubits, and most of thenj but a cubit and a half high. They have very long hair, reaching down to their A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 77 whom I contintied four years ; and my father now and then sending me small sums of money, I laid them out in learn- ing navigation, and other parts of the mathematics, useful to those who intend to travel, as I always believed it would be, some time or other, my fortune to do. When I left Mr. Bates, I went down to my father; where, by the as- sistance of him and my nncle John, and some other rela- tions, I got forty pounds, and a promise of thirty pounds a year to maintain me at Leyden ; there I studied physic two years and seven months, knowing it would be useful to me in long voyages. Soon after my return from Leyden, I was recommended by my good master, Mr. Bates, to be knees and lower ; and a beard larger than any man's. After their beards are grown long they wear no clothes, but the hair of their head falls behind, a great deal below their hams, and that of their beard before comes down to their feet; then laying their hair thick all about.their body, they afterwards gird themselves, making use of their hair for clothes Thoy are flat-nosed and ill-favored. Their sheep are like lambs, and their oxen and asses scarce as big as rams, and their horses and mules, and all their other cattle, not big- ger. Three thousand of these pigmies are household troops in the service of the king of India. They are good archers. They are very just, and use the same laws as the Indians do." Some of the old commentators on the Bible translated the word Oammachia, pigmies, and it is so rendered in the Vulgate. " This circumstance," as Sir Thomas Browne remarks, in his "Enquiries into Vulgar Errors," "tended greatly to confirm the popular belief in the existence of this fabulous race." Viewed as a mere fictipn, the account of Lilliput did not appear so extravagant in Swift's days as it does in ours. Every one has heard the story of the Irish bishop, a very learned man, who, having read the voyage to Lilliput, said that "there were some things in it which he could not believe." After the publication of the Travels, Swift was much amused to find that Gulliver was a real name, and that a Mr. Jonathan Gulliver was a member of the House of Representatives in Boston. An Am- erican writer adds that this Jonathan deemed it necessary to disclaim publicly all connection with Lemuel. 78 sullivee's travels: surgeon to the Swallow, Captain Abraham Pannell, com- mander ; with whom I continued three years and^ a half" making a voyage or two into the Levant, and some other parts. "When I came back I resolved to settle in London; to which Mr. Bates, my master, encouraged me, and by him I was recommended to several patients. I took part of a small house in the Old Jewry ; and being advised to alter my condition, I married Miss Mary Bnrton, second daughter to Mr. Edmund Burton, hosier, in Newgate Street, with whom I received four hundred pounds for a portion.* But my good master Bates dying in two years after, and I having few friends, my business began to fail ; for my * Swift and Defoe are unrivalled in the art of introducing trifling and minute circumstances which give an air of reality to their ficti- tious narratives. In Gulliver's early history, as in that of Crusoe, persons are casually mentioned of whom we hear nothing more. Gul- li^'cr's uncle, like Crusoe's brother, only comes on the stage to.disap- pcar again forever. This is quite contrary to the usual course of .ro- mance writers, who jarely introduce a personage or an incident that does not in some way aid the development of the plot. Sir Walter Scott suggests that Swift probably imitated Defoe in this particular, but the ideal character of Gulliver naturally led the Dean to introduce these petty particulars. He designed to portray Gulliver as a kind of second Darapier, uniting the homely sense and prejudices of a true-born Englishman to the acquired wisdom of a life of adventures. There is a sailor's bluntness and frankness in everything that Gulli- ver tells us of himself and family ; the occasional minuteness and even boarseness of the personal details are faithfully taken from the journals of the early English voyagers, whose accounts of their dis- coveries are strangely blended with the most trifling particulars re- specting their food, clothing, etc. The character of Gulliver is that of a thorough English sailor ; his education at Leyden did not raise him too high above the rude tars with whom he mingled, and wo always find his learning brought forward with difficulty, and by an effort, while his mother-wit and sailor's courage are present in every emergency. A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 79 conscience would not suffer me to imitate the bad practice of too many among my brethren. Having, therefore, con- sulted with my wife and some of my acquaintance, I de- termined to go again to sea. I was surgeon successively in two ships, and made several voyages, for six years, to the East and "West Indies, by which I got some addition to my fortune. My hours of leisure I spent in reading the best authors, ancient and modern, being always provided with a good number of books ; and when I was ashore, in ob- serving the manners and dispositions of the people, as well as learning their language ; wherein I had a great facility, by. the strength of my memory. The last of these voyages not proving very fortunate, I grew weary of the sea, and intended to stay at home with my wife and family. I removed from the Old Jewry to Fetter liane, and from thence to Wapping, hoping to get business among the sailors, but it Avould not turn to account. After three years' expectation 'that things would mend, 1 accepted an advantageous offer from Captain William Prichard, master of the Antelope, who was making a voyage to the South Sea, We set sail from Bristol, May 4, 1699, and our voyage at first was very prosperous. It would not be ^jroper, for some reasons, to trouble the reader with the particulars of our adventures in those seas ; let it suffice to inform him, that iu our passage from thence to the East Indies, we were driven . by a vio- lent storm to the northwest of Van Diemen's Land.* * This island was first discovered A.D. 1633, by Abel Janson Tas- man, a Dutch navigator, who called it Van Diemen's Land, after the governor of Batavia, by whom he had been sent to examine the Southern Ocean. Tasman's narrative was very loose and inaccurate, so that Swift might people the seas which that navigator traversed with any creatures he pleased. 80 Gulliver's travels: By an observation, we found ourselves in the latitude of 30 degrees 2 minutes south. Twelve of our crew were dead by immoderate labor and ill food ; the rest were in a very weak condition. On the 5th of November, which was the beginning of summer in those parts, the weather being very hazy, the seamen spied a rock within half a cable's length of the ship, but the wind was so strong that we were driven directly upon it, and immediately split. Six of the crew, of whom I was one, having let down the boat into the sea, made a shift to get clear of the ship and the rock. We rowed, by my computation, about three leagues, till we were able to work no longer, being already spent with labor while wc were in the ship. We therefore trusted ourselves to the mercy of the waves, and in about half an hour the boat was overset by a sudden flurry from the north. What became of my companions in the boat, as well as of those who escaped on the rock, or were left in the vessel, I cannot tell, but conclude they were all losti- For my own part, I swam as fortune -directed me, and was pushed forward by wind and tide. I often let my legs drop, and could feel no bottom, but when I was almost gone, and able to struggle no longer, I found myself within my depth ; and by this time the storm was much abated. The declivity was so small, that I walked near a mile before I got to the shore, which I conjectured was about eight o'clock in the evening. I then advanced forward near half a mile, but could not discover any sign of houses or inhabitants ; at least I was in so weak a condition that I did not observe them. I was extremely tired, and with that, and the heat of the weather, and about half a pint of brandy that I drank as I left the ship, I found myself much inclined to sleep. I lay down on the grass, which was very short and soft, where I slept sounder than ever I A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 81 remembered to have done in my life, and, as I reckoned, about nine hours; for when I awaked, it was just daylight. I attempted to rise, but was not able to stir; for, as I happened to lie on my back, I found my arms and legs were strongly fastened on each side to the ground ; and my hair, which was long and thick, tied down in the same maimer. I likewise felt several slender ligatures across my body, from my arm-pits to my thighs. I could only look upwards ; the sun began to grow hot, and the light offended my eyes. I heard a ' confused noise about me ; hut in the posture I lay, could see nothing except the sky. In a little time I felt something alive moving on my lefl leg, which advancing gently forward over my breast, came almost up to my chin ; when bending my eyes downward as much as I could, I perceived it to be a human creature ■^siiot six inches high, with bow and arrow in his hands, and a quiver at his back.* In the meantime, I felt at least forty more of the same kind (as I conjectured) following the first. I was in the utmost astonishment, and roared so loud that they all ran back in fright ; and some of them, as I was afterwards told, were hurt by the falls they got by * This incident is taken from Philostratus. (Icon. lib. ii, p. 817.) "The pigmies," he says, "were anxious to revenge the death of Antaeus, and having found Hercules napping in Libya, they mustered up all their forces against him. One phalanx assaulted his left hand, but against his right hand, that being the stronger, two phalanges were appointed. The archers and slingers besieged his feet, admiring the hugeness of his thighs ; but against his head, as the arsenal, they raised batteries, the king himself taking his post there. They set^ fire to his hair, put reaping-hooks in his eyes j and that he might not breathe, fixed doors to his mouth and nostrils. But all the execution that they could do was only to awake him ; and when this was done, deriding their folly, he gathered them all up into his lion's skin, and cari'ied them (Philostratus thinks) to Euristhenes." 82 Gulliver's travels: leaping trora my sides upon the ground. However, they soon returned, and one of them, who ventured so far as to get a full sight of my face, lifting up his hands and eyes by way of admiration, cried out in a shrill but distinct voice, Hekinah degul ! The others repeated the same words several times, but I then knew not what they meant, y I lay all this while, as the reader may believe, in great uneasiness ; at length, struggling to get loose, I had the fortune to break the strings, and wrench out the pegs that fastened my left arm to the ground, for, by lifting it up to my face, I discovered the methods they had taken to bind mo, and at the same time with a violent pull, which gave me excessive pain, I a little loosened the strings that tied down my hair on the left side, So that I was just able to turn my head about two inches. But the creatures ran off a second time, before I could seize them ; whereupon there was a great shout in a very shrill accent, and after it had ceased I heard one of them cry aloud, Tolgo phonac; when in an instant I felt above a hundred arrows discharged on my left hand, which pricked me like so many needles ; and besides they shot another flight into the air, as we do bombs in Europe, whereof many, I suppose, fell on my body (though I felt them not), and some on my face, which I immediately covered with my left hand. When this shower of arrows was over, I fell a groaning with grief and pain, and then striving again to get loose, they discharged another volley larger than the first, and some of them at- tempted with spears to stick me in the sides ; but by good luck I had on me a buff jerkin, which they could not pierce. I thought it the most prudent method to lie still, and my design was to continue so till night, when, my left hand being already loose, I could easily free myself: and as for the inhabitants, I had reason to believe I might be A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 83 a match for the greatest army they could bring against me, if they were all of the same size with him that I saw. But fortune disposed otherwise of me. When the people ob- served I was quiet, they discharged no more arrows ; but, by the noise I heard, I knew their numbers increased ; and about four yards from me, over against my right ear, I heard a knocking for above an hour, like that of people at work; when turning my head that way, as well as the pegs and strings would permit me, I saw a stage erected about a foot and a half from the ground, capable of hold- ing four of the inhabitants, with two or three ladders to mount it : from whence one of them, who seemed to be a person of quality, made me a long speech, whereof I un- derstood not a syllable.* But I should have mentioned, that before the principal person began his oration, he cried out three times, Langro dehul san (these words and the former were afterwards repeated and explained to me). Whereupon, immediately about fifty of the inhabitants came * Moore has made a very amusing use of this incident, in an ode to Sir Hudson Lowe, which is too good to he passed over with a mere reference. Sfr Hudson Lowe, Sir Hudson Low, (By name, and ah I hy nature so), As thou art fond of persecutions ; Perhaps thou'st read, or heard repeated, How Captain Gulliver was treated. When thrown among the Lilliputians. I They tied him down — these little men did — And having valiantly ascended Upon the mighty man's protuberance. They did so strut 1 Upon my soul, It must have been extremely droll To see their pigmy pride's exuberance I 84 Gulliver's travels: and cut tlic string that fastened the left side of my head, which gave me the liberty of turning it to the right, aad of observing the person and gesture of him that was to speak. He appeared to be of middle age, and taller than any of the other three who attended him, whereof one was a page that held up his train, and seemed to be somewhat longer than my middle finger; the other two stood one on each side to support him. He acted every part of an orator, and I could observe many periods of threatenings, and others of promises, pity, and kindness.* I answered in a few words, but in the most submissive manner, lifting up And how the doughty mannikins Amused themselves with sticking pins And needles in the great man's breeches ; And how some very little things, That pass'd for lords, on scaffoldings Got up and worried him with speeches. Alas I alas I that it should happen, To mighty men to be caught napping ; ' Though different too these persecutions ; For Gulliver there took the nap While here, the Nap — ah, sad mishap! — Is taken by the Lilliputians. * In the excitement that followed the Revolution, public speaking became more common in England than it had ever been before, and several of the Whig lords rendered efBcient service to the cause of the Hanoverian succession, by their speeches at county meetings. Swift despised and hated these itinerant orators, to whose exertions the over- throw of his party was mainly owing, and it is probable that in this description he alludes to some particular leader of the Whig party who was remarkable for his addresses to popular assemblies. Sir Robert Walpole after his expulsion from Parliament was an active agitator among the Whigs, and was not less formidable to Harlpy and J5olinc;brokE, outside the walls of the House of Commons, than he had been as a leader of parliamentary opposition. A VOYAOE TO LILLIPtJT. 85 my left hand and both my eyes to the sun, as calling him for a witness ; and being almost famished with hunger, not having eaten a morsel for some hours before I loft the ship, I found the demands of nature so strong upon me that I could not forbear showing my impatience (perhaps againtst the strict rules of decency), by putting my finger frequently to my mouth, to signify that I wanted food. The liurgo (for so they call a great lord, as I afterwards learned) under- stood me very well. He descended from the stage, and commanded that several ladders should be applied to my sides, on which above a hundred of the inhabitants mounted, and walked towards my mouth, laden with baskets full of meat, which had been provided and sent thither by the king's orders, upon the first intelligence he received of me. I observed there was the flesh of several animals, but could not distinguish them by the taste. There were shoulders, legs and loins, shaped like those of mutton, and very well dressed, but smaller than the wings of a lark. I ate them by two or three at a mouthful, and took three loaves at a time about the bigness of musket-bullets. They supplied me as fast as they could, showing a thousand marks of wonder and astonishment at my bulk and appetite. I then made another sign that I wanted drink. They found by my eating that a small quantity would not suffice me ; and being a most ingenious people, they slung up, with great dexterity, one of their largest hogsheads, then rolled it towards my hand, and beat out the top ; I drank it off at a draught, which I might well do, for it did not hold half a pint, and tasted like a small wine of Burgundy, but much more delicious. They brought me a second hogshead, which I drank in the same manner, and made signs for more : but they had none to give me. "When I had performed these wonders they shouted for joy, and M atJttrVER's TRAVEtSt (lanced upon my breast, repeating several times as they did, at first, HeUnah degul. They made me a sign that I should tlirow down the two hogsheads, but first warning the peo- ple below to stand out of the way, crying aloud, Boraeh mevolah ; and when they saw the vessels in the air there was a universal shout of Hekinah degul. I confess I was often tempted, while they were passing backwards and for- wards on my body, to seize forty or fifty of the first that came in my reach and dash them against the ground. But the remembrance of what I had felt, which probably might not be the worst they could do, and the promise of honor I made to them — for so I interpreted my submissive be- havior — soon drove out these imaginations. Besides, I now considered myself as bound by the laws of hospitality, to a people who had treated me with so much expense and magnificence. However, in my thoughts I could not suffi- ciently wonder at the intrepidity of these diminutive mor- tals, who durst venture to mount and walk upon my body while one of my hands was at liberty, without trembling at the very sight of so prodigious a creature as I must appear to them. After some time,.when they observed that I made no more demands for meat, there appeared before me a person of high rank from his imperial majesty. His ex- cellency, having mounted on the small of my right leg, advanced forwards up to my face, with about a dozen of his . retinue, and producing his credentials under the signet royal, which he applied close to my eyes, spoke about ten minutes without any signs of anger, but with a kind of determinate resolution ; often pointing forwards, which, as T afterwards found, was towards the capital city, about half a mile dis- tant, whither it was agreed by his majesty in council that I must be conveyed. I answered in few words, but to no purpose, and made a sign with my hand that was loose, A VOYAGE TO LILtlPUT. 87 putting it to the other (but over his excellency's head for fear of hurting him or his train), and then to my own head and body, to signify that I desired my liberty. It appeared that he understood me well enough, for he shook his head by way of disapprobation, and held his hands in a posture t« show that I must be carried as a prisoner. However, he made other signs, to let me under- stand that I should have meat and drink enough, and very good treatment. Whereupon I once more thought of attempting to break my bonds ; but again, when I felt the smart of their arrows upon my face and hands, whiclrwere all in blisters, and Many of the darts still sticking in them, and observing likewise that the number of my enemies in- creased, I gave tokens to let them know that they might do with me what they pleased. Upon this, the hurgo and his train withdrew, with much civility and cheerful coun- tenances. Soon after I heard a general shout, with fre- quent repetitions of the words, Peplom selan ; and I felt great numbers of people on my left side relaxing the cords to such a degree that I was able to turn upon my right, and to ease myself with making water ; which I very plen- tifully did, to the great astonishment of the people ; who, conjecturing by my motion what I was going to do, imme- diately opened to the right and left on that side, to avoid the torrent, which fell with such noise and violence from me. But, before this, they had daubed my face and both my hands, with a sort of ointment, very pleasant to the smell, which, in a few minutes, removed all the smart of their arrows. These circumstancas, added to the refresh- ment I had received by their victuals and drink, which were very nourishing, disposed me to sleep. I slept about eight hours, as I was afterwards assured ; and it was no 88 (JuiitivER's travels; wonder, for the ])hysician.s, by the em[)eror's order, had mingled a sleepy potion in the hogsheads of wine. It seems, that upon the first moment I was discovered sleeping on the ground, after my landing, the emperor had early notice of it by an express; and determined in coun- cil, that I should be tied in the manner I have related (which was done in the night while I slept), that plenty of meat and drink should be sent me, and a machine prepared to carry me to the capital city. This resolution perhaps may apjiear very bold and dangerous, and I am confident would not be imitated 1 y any prince in Europe on the like occasion. However, in my opinion, it was extremely pru- dent, as well as generous: for, supposing these people had endeavored to kill me with their spears and arrows, while I was asleep, I should certainly have awaked with the first sense of smart, which might have so far aroused my rage and strength as to have enabled me to break the strings wherewith I was tied ; after which, as they were not able to make resistance, so they could expect no mercy. These people are most excellent mathematicians, and ar- rived to a great perfection in mechanics by the countenance and encouragement of the emperor, who is a renowned patron of learning. This prince has several machines fixed on wheels, for the carriage of trees and other great weights. He often builds his largest men of war, whereof some are nine feet long, in the woods where tlie timber grows, and has them carried on these engines three or four hundred yards to the sea. Five hundred carpenters and engineers were immediately set at work to prepare the greatest engine they had. It was a frame of wood .raised three inches from the ground, seven feet long and four wide, moving upon twenty-two wheels. The shout I licard was upon the arrival of this engine, which, it seems, set out A VOYAGE TO LILLTPttX. 89 in four hours after my landing. It was brought parallel to me, as I lay. But the principal difficulty was to raise and place me in this vehicle. Eighty poles, each of one foot iHgh, were erected for this purpose, and very strong cords, of the bigness of packthread, were fastened by hooks to many bandages, which the workmen had girt round my neck, my hands, my body, and my legs. Nine hundred of the strongest men were employed to draw up these cords, by many pulleys fastened on the poles; and thus, in less than three hours, I was raised and slung into the engine, and there tied fast.* All this I was told; for, while the operation was performing, I lay in a profound sleep, by the force of that soporiferous medicine infused into my liquor. Fifteen hundred of the emperor's largest horses, each about four inches and a half high, were employed to draw me towards the metropolis, which, as I said, was half a mile distant. About four hours after we began our journey, I awaked by a very ridiculous accident; for the carriage being stopped awhile, to adjust something that was out of order, two or three of the young natives had the curiosity to see how I looked when I was asleep; they climbed up into the engine, * The caution of the Lilliputian courtiers is probably designed to ridicule the overacted solicitude by which the ministers of George I aflfected to protect the King from the plots of the Jacobites. The To- ries who hasted to greet the King on his landing were either refused admittance or harshly dismissed. '■'■ Lord Harcourt, who arrived with a patent for the peerage of the Prince of Wales, was abruptly dis- missed ; the Duke of Ormond, who was hastening to Greenwich, was forbidden to appear in the royal presence ; and Lord Oxford, who had shown more joy in proclaiming the King than his friends thought respectful towards the late Queen, was barely admitted in the crowd tq kiss the King's hand." — Lord J, Russell's Affairs of Europe, vol. i, p. 308. 90 Gulliver's travels: and advancing verj softly to my face, one of them, an officer in the guards, put the sharp end of his half-pike a good way up into my left nostril, which tickled my nose like a straw, and made me sneeze violently ; whereupon they stole off, unperceived, and it was three weeks before I knew the cause of my awaking so suddenly. We made a long march the remaining part of the day, and rested at night with five hundred guards on each side of me, half with torches, and half with bows and arrows, ready to shoot me, if I should offer to stir. The next morning, at sunrise, we continued our march, and arrived within two hundred yards of the city gates about noon. The emperor, and all his court, came out to meet us ; but his great oflS- cers would by no means suffer his majesty to endanger his person, by mounting on my body. At the place where the carriage stopped, there stood an ancient temple, esteemed to be the largest in the whole kingdom, which, having been polluted some years before by an unnatural murder, was, according to the zeal of those people, looked upon as profane, and therefore had been ap- plied to common use, and all the ornaments and furniture carried away. In this edifice it was determined I should lodge. The great gate, fronting to the north, was about four feet high, and almost two feet wide, through which I could easily creep. On each side of the gate was a small window, not above six inches from the ground ; into that on the left side the king's smith conveyed fourscore and eleven chains, like those that hang to a lady's watch in Europe, and almost as large, which were locked to my left leg with six-and-thirty padlocks. Over against . this temple, on the other side of the great highway, at twenty feet distance, there was a turret at least five feet high. Here the emperor ascended, with many principal lords of A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 91 his court, to have an opportunity of viewing me, as I was told, for I could not see them. It was reckoned that above an hundred thousand inhabitants came out of the town upon the same errand ; and, in spite of my guards, I be- lieve there could not be fewer than ten thousand, at several times, who' mounted my body, by the help of ladders. But a proclamation was soon issued, to forbid it, upon pain of death. When the workmen found it was impossible for me to break Joose, they cut all the strings that bound me; whereupon I rose up, with as melancholy a disposition as ever I had in my life. But the noise and astonishment of the people, at seeing me rise and walk, are not to be expressed. The chains that held my left leg were about two yards long, and gave me not only the liberty of walk- ing backwards and forwards in a semicircle, but, being fixed within four inches of the gate, allowed me to creep in, and lie at my full length in the temple. 92 atltLIVER's TRAVEIiBi CHAPTEK II. THE EMPEROR OP LILLIPIIT, ATTENDED BY SEVERAL OE THE NOBIL- ITY, COMES TO SKE THE AUTHOR IN HIS CONFINEMENT— THE emperor's PERSON AND HABITS DESCRIBED — LEARNED MEN APPOINTED TO TEACH THE AUTHOR THEIR LANGUAGE — HE GAINS FAVOR BY HIS MILD DISPOSITION — HIS POCKETS ABE SEARCHED, AND HIS SWOKD AND PISTOLS TAKEN FROM HIM. HEN I found myself on my feet, I looked about me, and must confess I never beheld a more entertaining prospect. The country around appeared like a continued garden, and the in- closed fields, which were generally forty feet square, re- sembled so many beds of flowers. These fields were intermingled with woods of half a stang,* and the tallest trees, as I could judge, appeared to be seven feet high. I viewed the town on my left hand, which looked like the painted scene of a city in a theatre. I had been for some hours extremely tired, however, so I crept into my house and shut the door after me. But it was of no use to try to get rid of so much company. I had to come out again, and to get a little change by step- I)ing backwards and forwards as far as my chains allowed. I soon found that the emperor had descended from the tower, and advancing on horseback towards me, which had like to have cost him dear ; for the beast, though very well * An old word for a perch, sixteen feet and a half. These small woods were therefore eight feet and a quarter. A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 93 trained, yet wholly unused to suoh a sight, which appeared as if a mountain moved before him, reared up on his hinder feet : but that prince, who is au excellent horse- man, hept his seat, till his attendants ran in, and held the bridle, while his majesty had time to dismount. When he alighted, he surveyed me round with great admiration ; but kept beyond the length of my chain. He ordered his cooks and butlers, who were already prepared, to give me victuals and drink, which they pushed forward in a sort of vehicles upon wheels, till I could reach them. I took these vehicles, and soon emptied them all : twenty of them were filled with meat, and ten with liquor; each of the former afforded me two or three good mouthfuls ; and I emptied the liquor of ten vessels which was contained in earthen vials, into one vehicle, drinking it off at a draught; and so I did with the rest. The empress and young princes of the blood of both sexes, attended by many ladies, sat at some distance in their chairs : but, upon the accident that happened to the emperor's horse, they alighted, and came near his person, which I am now going to describe. He is taller, by almost the breadth of my nail, than any of his court; which alone is enough to strike an awe into the beholders. His features are strong and masculine, with an Austrian lip, and arched nose; his complexion olive, his countenance erect, his body and limbs well proportioned, all his motions graceful, and his deportment majestic. He was then past his prime, being twenty-eight years and three-quarters old, of which he had reigned about seven in great felicity, and generally victorious.* For the better convenience of beholding * There can bo little room for doubting that in the description of the emperor of Lilliput, Swift dimly shadowed forth some leading traits in the character of George I, The points of direct resem- 94 GULLIVER'S TRAVELSr Ilim, I lay on my side, so that my face was parallel to his, and he stood but three yards off: however, I have had him since many times in my hand, and therefore cannot •be deceived in the description. His dress was very plain and simple, and the fashion of it between the Asiatic and the European ; but he had on his head a light helmet of gold, adorned with jewels, and a plume on the crest. He held his sword drawn in his hand to defend himself, if I should happen to break loose : it was almost three inches long ; the hilt and scabbard were gold enriched with dia- monds. His voice was shrill, but very clear and articulate; and I could distinctly hear it when I stoc^ up. The ladies blance, however, for obvious reasons, are vety /ew ; It is only by collecting all the incidents recorded of the Lilliputian emperor, that wo find out his general similarity to the first monarch of the house of Brunswick. The following account of George I. will enable the reader to discover the most prominent points of identity in the two portraits. " George I ascended the English throne in his fifty-fifth year, when men are usually more disposed to acquiesce in the settled routine than venture on novel and perhaps troublesome experiments. Moreover the natural disposition and understanding of the King were not of a kind at any period of his life to carry him out of the estab- lished orbit. He was a person of as .simple taslcs as appearance; in England he was a stranger ; his home being Hanover. He naturally inclined to the seclusion of a private station, being shy and reserved in public, but easy and facetious among his intimates. During the fciurteen years of his government of the electorate, he had acquired the reputation of a just and circumspect prince, who well understood and steadily pursued his own interests-, and would have been well content to end his days in the petty sovereignty of his ancestors, had ' not the ambition of others been greater than his own. Punctual in business, he was more dull than indolent; and the plain honesty of his temper, joined with the narrow notions of a low education, made him look upon liis acceptance of the crown as an act of usurpation, which was always uneasy to him. He had no taste for literature or the arts, and was very parsimonious," — Wade's British History, p. 334, A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 95 and courtiers were all most magnificently clad ; so that the spot they stood upon seemed to resemble a petticoat spread on the ground, embroidered with figures of gold and silver. His imperial majesty spoke often to me, and I returned answers : but neither of us could understand a syllable. There were several of his priests and lawyers present (as I conjectured- by their habits), who were commanded to ad- dress themselves to me ; and I spoke to them in as many languages as I had the least smattering of, which were High and Low Dutch, Latin, French, Spanish, Italian, and Lingua Franca ; but all to no purpose. After about two hours the court retired, and I was left with a strong guard, to prevent the impertinence, and probably the malice of the rabble; who were very impatient to crowd about me as near as they durst; and some of them had the impudence to shoot their arrows at me, as I sat on the ground by the door of my house, whereof one very narrowly missed my left eye. But the colonel ordered six of the ringleaders to be seized, and thought no punishment so proper as to de- liver them bound into my hands ; which some of his soldiers accordingly did, pushing them forwards with the butt-ends of their pikes into my reach. I took them all in my right hand, put five of them into my coat-pocket, and as to the sixth, I made a countenance as if I would eat him alive. The poor man squalled terribly, and the colonel and his officers were in much pain, especially when they saw mc take out my penknife: but I soon put them out of fear; for, looking mildly, and immediately cutting the strings he was bound'with, I set him gently on the ground and away he ran. I treated the rest in the same manner, taking them one by one out of my pocket; and I observed both the soldiers and people were highly delighted at this mark of 96 GUIiLIVER'S TRAVELS: my clemency, which was represented very much to my a(^- vantage at court.* Towards night I got with some difficulty into my house, where I lay on the ground, and continued to do so about a fortnight; duringwhich time, the emperor gave orders to have a bed prepared for me. Six hundred beds f of the common measure were brought in carriages, and worked up in my house; a hundred and fifty of their beds, sewn to- gether, made up the breadth and length ; and these were four double ; which, however, kept me but very indiffer- ently from the hardness of the floor, that was of smooth stone. By the same computation they provided me with sheets, blankets, and coverlets, tolerable enough for one who had been so long inured to hardships. As the news of my arrival spread through the kingdom, it brought prodigious numbers of rich, idle', and curious people to see me ; so that the villages were almost emptied ; and great neglect of tillage and household affairs must have ensued, if his imperial majesty had not provided by several proclamations and orders of state, against this in- conveniency. He directed, that those who had already deheld me should return home, and not presume to come * Gulliver's history as a courtier at Lilliput is obviously designed to represent the administration of Harley and Bolinghroke, at the close ot Anne's reign. Whatever were the other demerits 6t that cabinet, it must be confessed that they showed more tenderness to the party by which they were opposed, and greater clemency to political delinquents than their successors. This forbearance, especially i a the case of libellers, is very ingeniously intimated by Gulliver's granting pardon to the malicious archers. Swift used frequently to remarli'' that Anne was the only sovereign during whose entire reigu no ono suffered the penalties of high treason. f Gulliver has observed great exactness in the just proportion ano appearance of the objects thus lessened.- -0)Te;-i/. A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 97 within fifty yards of my house, without license from the court; whereby the secretaries of state got considerable fees. In the meantime the emperor held frequent councils, to debate what course should be taken with me; and I was afterwards assured by a particular friend, a person of great quality, who was as much in the secret as any, that the court was imder many diiSculties concerning me. They apprehended my breaking loose; that my diet would be very expensive, and might cause a famine.* Sometimes they determined to starve me, or at least to shoot me in the face and hands with poisoned arrows, -which would soon dispatch me ; but again they considered, that the stench of so large a carcass might produce a plague in the metropo- lis and probably spread through the whole kingdom. In the midst of these consultations, severa,l officers of the army went to the door of the great council-chamber, and two of them being admitted, gave an account of my behavior to the six criminals above-mentioned; which made so favor- able an impression in the breast of his majesty and the whole board, in my behalf, that an imperial commission was issued out, obliging all the villages, nine hundred yards round the city, to deliver in every morning six beeves, forty sheep, and other victuals for my sustenance; together with a proportionable quantity of bread, and wine and other liquors; for the due payment f which, his maj- esty gave assignments upop his treasury : — for this prince lives chiefly upon his own demesnes: seldom, except upon great occasions, raising any subsidies upon his subjects, * The parsimony of (Jeorge I has been already noticed ; " avarice was so predominant in him, that he would raise no troops to secure the succession." — Wade's British History, p. 334. 7 98 Gulliver's travels: wliu are bound to attend him in his wars at their own ex- pense. An establishment was also made of six hundred persons to be my domestics, who had board-wages allowed . for their maintenance, and tents built for them very conve- niently on each side ot my door. It was likewise ordered that three hundred tailors should make me a suit of clothes, after the fashion of the country; that six of his majesty's ' greatest scholars should be employed to instruct me in their language ; and lastly, tliat the emperor's horses, and those of the nobility and troops of guards, should be frequently exercised in my sight, to accustom themselves to me. All these orders were -duly put in execution; and in about three weeks I made a great progress in learning their lan- guage : during which time the emperor frequently honored me with his visits, and was pleased to assist my masters in teaching me. We began already to converse together in some sort; and the first words I learned, were to express my desire "that he would be pleased to give me my lib- erty ;" which I every day repeated on my knees. His an- swer, as I could apprehend it, was " that this must be a work of time, not lo be thought on without the advice of his council, and that first I must lumos kelmin pesso desmar Ion emposo;" that is, swear a peace with him and his king- dom : however, that I should be used with all kindness: and he advised me "to acquire by my patience and discreet behavior, the good opinion of himself and his subjects." He desired "I would not take it ill, if he gave orders to certain proper officers to search me ; for probably I might carry about me several weapons, which must needs be dan- gerous things, if they answered the bulk of so prodigious a person." I said, "His majesty should be satisfied; for I was ready to strip myself, and turn up my pockets before him." This I delivered, part in words, and part in signs. A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 99 He replied, " that, by the laws of the kingdom, I must be searched by two of his officers; that he knew this could not be done without my consent and assistance; and he had so good an opinion of my generosity and justice, as to trust their persons in my hands ; that whatever they took from me, should be returned when I left the country, or paid for at the rate which I would set upon them." I took up the two officers in my hands, put them first into my coat- pockets, and then into every other pocket about me, except my two fobs and another secret pocket, which I had no mind should be searched, wherein I had some little neces- saries that were of no coasequence to any but myself. In one of my fobs there was a silver watch, and in the other a small quantity of gold in a purse. These gentlemen, hav- ing pen, ink, and paper about them, made an exact inven- tory of everything they saw; and when they had done, desired I would set them down, that they might deliver it to the emperor. This inventory I afterwards translated into English, and is word for word as follows:* " Imprimis, In the right coat-pocket of the great Man- mountain (for so I interpret the words quinbus flestrin), after the strictest search, we found only one great piece of coarse cloth, large enough to be a foot-cloth for your maj- esty's chief room of state. In the left pocket we saw a huge silver chest, with a cover of the same metal, which we, the searchers, were not able to lift. We desired it • * This inventory is designed to ridicule the reports of the several committees of secresy appointed by Walpolo to investigate the pre- sumed designs of the Jacobites, and especially the secret negotiations said to be connected with the treaty of Utrecht. It was said of these reports, that the committees " found nothing suspicious but what they could not understand ;" to which it was added, that " as they under- stood nothing, they suspected everything." 100 Gulliver's tbavbls-: should l)e opened, and one of us stepping into it, found himself up to the mid-leg in a sort of dust, some part whereof flying up to our faces, set .us both a-sneezing for several times together. In his right waistcoat pocket we found a prodigious bundle of white thin substances, folded one over another, about the bigness of three men, tied with a strong cable, and marked with black figures; which we humbly conceive to be writings, every letter almost half as large as the palm of our hands. In the left there was a sort of engine, from the back of which were ex- tended twenty long poles, resembling the palisadoes before your majesty's court; wherewith we conjecture the man- mountain combs his head, for we did not always trouble him with questions, because we found it a great difficulty to make him understand us. In the large pocket on the right side of his middle cover (so I translate ranfu-lo, by which tlicy meant my breeches), we saw a hollow pillar of iron, about the length of a man, fastened to a strong piece of timber larger than the pillar ; and upon one side of the pillar were huge pieces of iron sticking out, cut into strange figures, which we know not what to make of. In the left pocket, another engine of tiie same kind. In the smaller pocket on the right side, were several round flat pieces of white and red metal, of different bulk ; some of the white, which seemed to be silver, were so large and heavy that my comrade and I could hardly lift them. In- the left pocket were two black pillars irregularly shaped : we could not, without difficulty, reach the top of them as we stood at the bottom of his pocket. One of them was covered, and seemed all of a piece; but a.t the upper end of tlie other there appeared a white round substance, about twice the bigness of our heads. Within eacli of these was in- closed a prodigious plate of steel; which, by our orders. A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 101 we obliged him to show us, because we apprehended they miglit be dangerous engines. He took them out of their cases, and told us, that in his own country his practice was to shave his beard with one of these, and cut his meat with the other. There were two pockets which we could not enter : these he called his fobs ; they were two large slits cut into the top of his middle cover, but squeezed close by the pressure of his belly. Out of the right fob hung a greiat silver chain, with a wonderful kind of engine at the bottom. We directed him to draw out whatever was at the end of that chain, which appeared to be a globe, half sil- ver, and half of some transparent metal; for, on the trans- parent side, we saw certain strange figures circularly drawn, and thought we could touch them, till we found our fingers stopped by that lucid substance. He put this engine to our ears, which made an incessant noise, like that of a water-mill : and we conjecture it is either some unknown * animal, or the god that he worships; but we are more in- clined to the latter opinion, because he assured us (if we understood him right, for he expressed himself very im- perfectly) that he seldom did anything without consulting it. He called it his oracle, and said it pointed out the time for every action of his life. From the left fob he took out a net almost large enough for a fisherman, but contrived to open and shut like a purse, and which served him for the same use: we found therein several massy pieces of yellow metal, which, if they be real gold, must be of immense value. "Having thus, in obedience to your majesty's com- mands, diligently searched all his pockets, we observed a girdle about his waist, made of the hide of some pro- digious animal, from which, on the left side, hung a sword of the length of five men; and on, the right, a bag, or 102 pouch, divided into two cells, each cell capable of holding three of your majesty's subjects. In one of these cells were several globes, or balls, of a most ponderous metal, about the bigness of our heads, and required a strong hand to lift them : the other cell contained a heap of certain black grains, but of no great bulk or weight, for we could hold above fifty of them in the palms of our hands. " This is an exact inventory of what we found about the body of the man-mountain, who used us with great civility, and due respect to your majesty's commissiou. Signed and sealed on the fourth day of the eighty-ninth moon of your majesty's auspicious reign : When the inventory was read over to the emperor, he directed me, although in very gentle terms, to deliver up the several particulars.* He first called for my scimitar, * The searches made by the Whigs in the houses of persons suspect- ed of Jacobitism and Popery, are scarcely caricatured in this whim- sical account of the examination of Gulliver's pockets. Sir Walter Scott has given a similar description in his Peveril of the Peak, where the emissaries of the House of Commons, puzzled by the ordinary habits of life in the higher ranks, were disposed to find treason in a laced waistcoat, and Popery in a hooped petticoat. Writing in Ire- land, Swift was likely to find an ample supply of searchers and alarmists, for the Cromwellian settlers derived their title to their estates from no better source than the English suspicion and hatred of Popery, were anxious to keep alive such feelings, and oatalngups of suspicious articles, even more ludicrous than those in the text, may be found in the records of Dublin Castle. One of the objects of suspicion in those days, wearied out by con- stant requisitions to surrender his firearms, and by the repeated an- A VOTAflli TO LILLlPtJT. 103 which 1 took out, scabbard and all In the meantime he ordered three thousand of his choicest troops (who then at- tended him) to surround me at a distance, with their bows and arrows just ready to discharge ; but I did not observe it, for mine eyes were wholly fixed upon his majesty.* He then desired me to draw my scimitar, which, although it had got some rust by the sea-water, M'as in most parts, exceeding bright. I did so, and immediately all the troops gave a shout between terror and surprise ; for the sun shone clear, and the reflection dazzled their eyes, as I waved the scimitar to and fro in my hand. His majesty, who is a most magnanimous prince, was less daunted than I could expect: he ordered me to return it into the scabbard, and cast it on the ground as gently as I could, about six feet from the end of my chain. The next thing he demanded was one of the hollow iron pillars ; by which he meant my pocket pistols. I drew it out, and at his desire, as well as I could, expressed to him the use of it; and charging it noyances which he had experienced, sent his poljer, tongs, and shdvel to the arsenal, and took a regular receipt for them from the officer in command. * There is exquisite humor in these formal preparations for security, which escaped the notice of the persons they were intended to intimi- date. The satire is directed against the precautions taken by the Whig ministers on receiving information of real or pretended plots (if the Jacobites, particularly in May, 1722, when " orders were issued to all military officers to repair to their respective commands. Gen- eral Macartnej' was dispatched to Ireland to bring over some troops into the west of England. Messengers were sent to Scotland to secure some suspected persons ; and the States of Holland were directed to keep in readiness the guarantee troops to be sent to England in case of need." — Wade, 369. At the same time a proclamation was issued commanding all papists to depart from London and Westminster 1 and for confining papists to their habitations. 104 Gulliver's travels: only with powder, which, by the closeness of my pouch happened to escape wetting in the sea (an inconvenience against which all prudent mariners take special care to pro- vide), I first cautioned the emperor not to be afraid, and then I let it off in the air. The astonishment here was much greater than at the sight of the scimitar. Hundreds fell down as if they had been struck dead ; and even the emperor, although he stood his ground, could not recover himself for some time. I delivered up both my pistols in the same manner as I had done. my scimitar, and then my pouch of powder and bullets ; begging him that the former might be kept from fire, for it would kindle with the smallest spark, and blow up his imperial palace into the air. I likewise delivered up my watch, which the emperor was very curious to see, and commanded two of his tallest yeomen of the guards to bear it on a pole upon their shoulders, as draymen in England do a barrel of ale. He was amazed at the con- tinual noise it made, and the motion of the minute-hand, which he could easily discern ; for their sight is much more acute than ours : he asked the opinion of his learned men about it, which were various and remote, as the reader may well imagine without my repeating ; although, indeed, I could not very perfectly understand them. I then gave . up my silver and copper money, my purse with nine large pieces of gold, and some smaller ones ; my knife and razor, my comb and silver snuff-box, my handkerchief and jour- nal-book. My scimitar, pistols, and pouch, were conveyed in carriages to his majesty's stores; but the rest of my goods were returned me. I had, as I before observed, one private pocket, which escaped their search, wherein there was a pair of spectacles A VOYAGE TO LILLIPtlT. 105 (which I sometimes use for the weakness of mine eyes), a pocket perspective, and some other little conveniences; which, being of no consequence to the emperor, I did not think myself bound in honor to discover, and T appre- hended they might be lost or spoiled if I ventured them out of my possession. 106 Gulliver's travels*. CHAPTER III. THE AUTHOR DIVERTS THE KMrEROR, AND HIS NOBILITY OF BOTH SEXES, IN A VERY UNCOMMON MANNER — THE DIVERSIONS OF THK COURT OF LILLIPUT DESCRIBED — THE AUTHOR HAS HIS LIBERTY GRANTED HIM UPON CERTAIN CONDITIONS. Y gentleness and good behavior had gained so far on the emperor and his court, and indeed upon the army and people in general, that I began to conceive hopes of getting my liberty in a short time. I took all possible methods to cultivate this favorable disposition. The natives came by degrees to be less apprehensive of any danger from me. I would sometimes lie down, and let five or six of them dance on my hand ; and at last the boys and girls would venture to come and play at hide-and-seek in my hair. I had now made a good progress in understanding and speaking the language. The emperor had a mind one day to entertain me with several of the country shows, wherein they ex- ceeded all nations I have known, both for dexterity and magnificence. I was diverted with none so much\aa thaT of the rope-dancers, performed upon a slender white thread, extended about two feet, and twelve inches from the groiuid. Upon which I shall desire liberty, with the readerls-patience, to enlarge a little. This diversion is only practiced by those persons who are candidates for great employments and high favor at court. They are trained in this art from their youth, and A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 107 are not always of noble birth, or liberal education. When a great office is vacant, either by death or disgrace (whicii often happens), five or six of those candidates petition the emperor to entertain his majesty and the court with a dance on the rope; and whoever jumps the. highest with- out falling, succeeds in the office. Very often the chief ministers themselves are commanded to show their skill, and to convince the emperor that they have not lost their faculty. Flimnap, the treasurer, is allowed to cut a caper on the straight rope, at least an inch higher than any other lord in the whole empire. I have seen him do the summerset* several times together upon a trencher fixed on a rope which is no thicker than a common packthread in England.f My friend Reldresal, principal secretary * Summerset or summersault, a gambol of a tumbler, in which he springs up, turns heels over head in the air, and comes down upon his feet. — Orig. t Flimnap is intended for Sir Robert Walpole, from whom Swift at first had some expectations of promotion : when these were dis- appointed, the Dean became the bitter enemy of the minister, and his hatred was aggravated by the zeal with which Walpole persecuted Swift's great favorites, Lord Bolingbroke and Br. Atterbury, Bishop of Kochester. In an epistle to the poet Gay, the Dean gives the fol- lowing bitter description of Walpole. And first to make my observation right, I place a statesman full before my sight, A bloated minister in all his geer, WUh shameless visage and perfidious leer ; Two rows ot teeth arm each devouring jaw, And ostrich-like his all-digesting maw. My fancy drags this monster to my view, To show the world his chief reverse in you. Of loud unmeaning sounds a rapid flood Eolls from his mouth in plenteous streams of mud ; "With these, the court and senate-house he plies, Made up of noise, and impudence, and lios. 108 Gulliver's travels: for private affairs, is in iny opinion, if I am not partial, the second after tlie treasurer;* the rest of the great officers are much upon a par. These diversions are often attended with fatal accidents, Avhereof great numbers are on record. I myself have seen two or three candidates break a limb. But the danger is much greater when the ministers themselves are com- manded to show their dexterity ! for, by contending to excel themselves and their fellows, they strain so far that there is hardly one of them who has not received a fall, and some of them two or three. I was assured that, a year or And again, alluding to Walpole's continuance in office under George II, and Sir Spencer Compton's refusal to form an adminis- tration. 1 knew a brazen minister of state, Who bore for twice ten years the public hate; In every mouth the question most in vogue Was, " When will they turn out this odious rogue?" A juncture happen'd, in his highest pride ; While he went robbing on, old master died. We thought there now remained po room to doubt ; His work is done, the minister must out. The court invited more than one or two ; Will you. Sir Spencer ? or will you ? or you ? But not a soul his office durst accept; The subtle knave had all the plunder swept; And such was then the temper of the times, He owed his preservation to his crimes. , The candidates observed his dirty paws. Nor found it difficult to guess the cause ; But when they smelt such foul corruptions round him, Away they fled, and left him as they found him. * Mr. Secretary Stanhope, was most probably intended by Keldre- sal ; he supplanted Walpole in 1717, and adopted a more temperate and conciliatory course towards the Tories and Jacobites, with whom Swift was connected. A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 109 two before my arrival, Flimnap would infallibly have broke his neck, if one of the king's cushions, that acci- dentally lay on the ground, had not weakened the force of his fall.* There is likewise another diversion, which is only shown before the emperor and empress, and the first minister, upon particular occasions. The emperor lays on the table three fine silken threads of six inches long ; one is blue, the other red, and the third green. These threads are proposed as prizes for those persons whom the emperor has a mind to distinguish by a peculiar mark of his favor. The ceremony is performed in his majesty's great chamber of state, where the candidates are to undergo a trial of dexterity, very different from the former, and such as I have not observed the least resemblance of in any other country of the new or old world. The emperor holds a stick in his hands, both ends parallel to the horizon, while the candidates advancing, one by one, sometimes leap over the stick, sometimes creep under it, backward and for- ward, several times, according as the stick is advanced or depressed. Sometimes the emperor holds one end of the stick, and the first minister the other ; sometimes the min- ister has it entirely to himself. Whoever performs his part with the most agility, and holds out the longest in * "Walpole was compelled to resign his office in 1717, through the intrigues of Lord Sunderland and Mr. -Secretary Stanhope, who, fol- lowing the King to Hanover, sought and found a favorable oppor- tunity of supplanting Walpole and Townshend in the royal favor. After an exclusion of four years, which seemed politically " to have broken his neck," he was restored by his interest with the Duohess of Kendal, the favorite mistress of George I ; and this was " the king's cushion that lay accidentally on the ground, and weakened the force of the fall." 110 GULLIVER'S travels: leaping and creeping, is rewarded with the blue-coloi-ed silk ; the red is given to the next, and the green to the third, which they all M'ear girt twice round about the middle; and you see few great persons about this court who are not adorned with one of these girdles.* The horses of the army, and those of the royal stables, having been daily led before me, were no longer shy, but would come up to my very feet without starting. The riders would leap th«m over my hand, as I held it on the ground; and one of the emperor's huntsmen, upon a large courser, took my foot, shoe and all ; which was indeed a prodigious leap. I had the good fortune to divert the em- peror one day after a very extraordinary manner. I de- sired he would order several sticks of two feet high, and the thickness of an ordinary cane, to be brought me ; where- upon his majesty commanded the master of his woods to give directions accordingly; and the next morning six wood- men arrived with as many carriages, drawn by eight horses to each. 1 took nine of these sticks, and fixing them firmly in the ground in a quadrangular figure, two feet and a half square, I took four other sticks and tied them parallel at each corner, about two feet from the ground ; then I fas- tened my handkerchief to the nine sticks that stood erect ; and extended it on all sides, till it was tight as the toj) of a drum ; and the four parallel sticks, rising about five inches higher than tiie handkerchief, served as ledges on * The revival of tlie Order of the Bath by Sir Robert Walpole, in 1726, as a. cheap means of gratifying his political adherents, was fair game to a satirist like Swift. Walpole was distinguished not only by the Order of the Bath, but by that of the Garter, which was conferred on him in 172G. — Coxe's Life of Walpule It is scarcely necessary to mention, that blue is the cognizance of the Garter, red of the Bath, and green of the Thistle. A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT 111 each side. When I had finished my work, I desired the emperor to let a troop of the best horse, twenty-four in number, come and exercise upon this plain. His majesty approved of the proposal, and I took them up one by one, in my hands, ready mounted and armed, with the proper officers to exercise them. As soon as they got into order, they divided into two parties, performed mock skirmishes, discharged blunt arrows, drew their swords, fled and pur- sued, attacked and retired, and in short, discovered the best military discipline I ever beheld. The'parallel sticks secured them and their horses from falling over the stage ; and the emperor was so much delighted, that he ordered this entertainment to be repeated several days, and once was pleased to be lifted up, and give the word of com mand ; and, with great difficulty, persuaded even the empress her- self to let me hold her in her close chair within two yards of the stage, when she was able to take a full view of the whole performance. It was my good fortune, that no ill accident happened in these entertainments; only once a fiery horse, that belonged to one of the captains, pawing with his hoof, struck a hole in my handkerchief, and his foot slipping, he overthrew his rider and himself; but I immediately relieved them both, and covering the hole with one hand, I set down the troop with the other, in the same manner as I took them up. The horse that fell was strained in the left shoulder, but the rider got no hurt; and I repaired my handkerchief as well as I could : how- ever, I would not trust to the strength of it any more, in such dangerous enterprises. About two or three days before I was set at liberty, as I was entertaining the court with this kind of feats, there arrived an express to inform his majesty that some of his subjects, riding near the place where I was first taken up. 112 Gulliver's travels: had seen a great blaelc substance lying on the; ground, very oddly shaped, extending its edges round, as wide as his majesty's bed-chaniber, and rising up in the middle as high as a man ; that it was no living creature, as they at first apprehended, for it lay on the grass without motion, and some of them had walked round it several times ; that, by mounting upon each other's shoulders, they had got to the top, which was flat and even, and stamping upon it, they found that it was hollow within ; that they humbly con- ceived it might be something belonging to the man-moun- tain ; and if his majesty pleased, they would undertake to bring it with oidy five horses. I presently knew what they meant, and was glad at heart to receive this intelli- gence. It seems, upon my first reaching the shore after our shipwreck, I was in such confusion, that before I came to the place where I went to sleep, my hat, which I had fastened with a string to my head while I was rowing, and had stuck on all the time I was swimming, fell off after I came to land ; the string, as I conjecture, breaking by some accident, which I had never observed, but thought my hat had been lost at sea. I entreated his imperial majesty to give orders it might be brought to me as soon as possible, describing to him the use and the nature of it; and the next day the wagoners arrived with it, but not in a very good condition, they had bored two holes in the brim, within an inch and a half of the edge, and fastened two hooks in the holes, these hooks were tied by a long cord to the harness, and thus my hat was dragged along for above half an English mile; but the ground in that country being extremely smooth and level, it received less damage than I expected. Two days after this adventure, the emperor, having ordered that part of his army which quarters in and about A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 113 his metropolis, to be in readiness, took a fancy of diverting himself in a singular manner. He desired that I would stand like a colossus, with my legs as far asunder as I con- veniently could. He then commanded his general (who was an old experienced leader, and a great patron of mine) to draw up the troops in close order, and march them under me ; the foot by twenty-four abreast, and the horse by sixteen, with drums beating, colors flying, and pikes advanced. This body consisted of three thousand foot, and a thousand horse. His majesty gave orders, upon pain of death, that every soldier in his march should observe the strictest decency with regard to my person ; which, however, could not prevent some of the younger officers from turning up their eyes, as they passed under me ; and to confess the truth, my breeches were at that time in so ill a condition, that they afforded some opportunities for lauo;hter and admiration.* I had sent so many memorials and petitions for my liberty that his majesty at length mentioned the matter, first in the cabinet, and then in a full council ; where it was opposed by none, except Skyresh Bolgolam, who was pleased, without any provocation, to be my mortal enemy. f * The author probably intends to ridicule the partiality of Ge&rge I, for reviews and military pageantry. Hogarth's celebrated picture of the " March of the Guards to Finchley " belongs to a much later period, but its satiric touches would probably have been as applicable in.the reign of the first as of the second George. j- Skyresh Bolgolam is most probably the Duke of Argyle, who was greatly incensed at Swift's attacks on the Scottish nation, in his ' " Public Spirit of the Whigs." In an unfinished poem on himself, the Dean alludes to the proclamation offering three hundred pounds for the discovery of the author of this pamphlet, which was issued at the demand rather than the request of the Duke of Argyle ; he con- a 114 guIjLivek s travels: But it was carried against him by the whole board, and confirmed by the emperor. That minister was galbet, or admiral of the realm, very much in his master's confidence, and a person well versed in affairs, but of a morose and sour. complexion. However, he wa-s at length persuaded to comply, but prevailed that the articles and conditions upon which I should be set free, and to which I must swear, should be drawn up by himself. These articles were brought to me by Skyresh Bolgolam in person, attended by two under-secretaries and several persons of distinction. After they were read, I was demanded to swear to the performance of them, first, in the manner of my own country, and afterward in the method prescribed by their laws, which was, to hold my right foot in my left hand, and to place the middle finger of my right hand on the crown of my head, and my thumb on the tip of my right ear. But because the reader may be curious to have some idea of the style and manner of expression peculiar to that people, as well as to know the articles upon which I recovered my liberty, I have made a translation of the whole instrument, word for word, as near as I was able, which I here offer to the public* ducted all the Scotch lords in a body to demand an audience of the Queen, and seek reparation. The Queen incensed, his services forgot. Leaves him a victim to the vengeful Scot ; Now through the realm a proclamation spread, To fix a price on his devoted head, "While, innocent, he scorns ignoble flight ; His watchful friends preserve him by a sleight. See also the character given of Argyle in Swift's notes on MacUy^ Appendix to Lilliput, I. * In his description of Lilliput, in the following articles, Gulliver seems to have had England more immediately in view. In his de- A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 115 GOLBASTO MOMAREM EvLAME GuEDILO ShEFIN MuLLY Ully Gue, most mighty emperor of Lilliput, delight and terror of the universe, whose dominions extend five thousand blustrugs (about twelve miles in circumfer- ence) to the extremities of the globe ; monarch of all mon- archs, taller than the sons of men ; whose feet press down to the centre, and whose head strikes against the sun ; at whose nod the princes of the earth shake their knees; pleasant as the spring, comfortable as the summer, fruitful as autumn, dreadful as winter. His most sublime Majesty proposes to the Man-mountain, lately arrived at our celes- tial dominions, the following articles, which, by a solemn oath, he shall be obliged to perform : I. The Man-mountain shall not depart from our domin- ions, without our license under our great seal. II. He shall not presume to come into our metropolis without our express order; at which time, the inhabitants shall have two hours' warning to keep within doors. III. The said Man-mountain shall confine his walks to our principal highroads, and not offer to walk or lie down in a meadow or field of corn. IV. As he walks the said roads, he shall take the utmost care not to trample upon the bodies of any of our loving scription of Blefuscu, he seems to intend the people and kingdom of France. — Orrery. It is perhaps in order to qualify this parallel that Swift has changed the relative description of the two countries, and made Lilliput the continent, Blefuscu the island. — Sir Walter Scott, 116 auLLivBR's travels: subjects, their horses or carriages, nor take any of our sub- jects into his hands without their own consent. V. If an express requires extraordinary dispatch, the Man-mountain shall be obliged to carry, in his pocket, the messenger and horse a six days' journey once in every moon, and return the said messenger back (if so required) safe to our imperial presence. VI. He shall be our ally against our enemies in the island of Blefuscu, and do liis utmost to destroy their fleet, which is now preparing to invade us. VII. That the said Man-mountain shall, at his time of leisure, be aiding and assisting to our workmen, in helping to raise certain great stones, towards covering the wall of the principal park, and other our royal buildings. VIII. That the said Man-mountain shall in two moons' time, deliver in an exact survey of the circumference of our dominions, by a computation of his own paces round the coast. Lastly, That, upon his solemn oath to observe the above articles, the said Man-mountain shall have a daily allow- ance of meat and drink sufficient for the support of 1724 of our subjects, with free access to our royal person, and other marks of our favor. Given at our palace at Belfa- borac, the twelfth day of the ninety-first moon of our reign. I swore and subscribed to these articles with great cheer- fulness and content, although some of them were not so A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 117 honorable as I could have wished ; which proceeded wholly from the malice of Skyresh Bolgolam, the high-admiral ; whereupon my chains were immediately unlocked, and T was at full liberty. The emperor himself, in person, did me the honor to be by at the whole ceremony. I made my acknowledgments by prostrating myself at his majesty's feet ; but he commanded me to rise ; and after many gra- cious expressions, which to avoid the censure of vanity I shall not repeat, he added, " that he hoped I should prove a useful servant, and well deserve all the favors he had already conferred upon me, or might do for the future." The reader may please to observe, that in the last article of the recovery of my liberty, the emperor stipulates to allow me a quantity of meat and drink sufficient for the support of 1724 Lilliputians. Some time after, asking a friend at court how they came to fix on that determined number, he told me that his majesty's mathematicians, having taken the height of my body by the help of a quadrant, and finding it to exceed theirs in the proportion of twelve to one, they concluded from the similarity of their bodies, that mine must contain at least 1724 of theirs, and consequently would require as much food as was nec- essary to support that number of Lilliputians. By which tlie reader may conceive an idea of the ingenuity of that people, as well as the prudent and exact economy of so great a prince. 118 QtLLiVER's travels: CHAPTER rV. MILDENDO, THE METROPOLIS OJ' LILLIPUT, DESCRIBED, TOGETHER WITH THE EMPEROR'S PALACE — A CONVERSATION BETWEEN THE AUTHOR AND A PRINCIPAL SECRETARY, CONCERNING THE AFFAIRS OP THAT EMPIRE — THE AUTHOR OFFEEB TO SERVE THE EMPEROR IN HIS WARS. IBERTY having been granted me, my first re- quest was for permission to see Mildendo, the metropolis ; which the emperor readily allowed me, but with a special charge to do no hurt either to the inhabitants or their houses. The people had notice, by proclamation, of my design to visit the town. The wall, which compassed it, is two feet and a half high, and at least eleven inches broad, so that a coach and horses may be driven very safely round it; and it is flanked with strong towers at ten feet distance. I stepped over the great western gate, and passed very gently and sidelong through the two principal streets only in my short waist- coat, for fear of damaging the roofs and eaves of the houses with the skirts of my coat. I walked with the utmost cir- cumspection, to avoid treading on any stragglers who might remain in the streets ; although the orders were very strict, that all people should keep in their houses at their own peril. Tlie garret windows and tops of houses were so crowded with spectators, that I thought in all my travels I had not seen a more populous place. The city is an ex- act square, each side of the wall being five hundred feet A VOYAaH to tlLtlftt. long. The two great sti-eets, which run across and di into four quarters, are five feet wide. The lanes and aii which I could not enter, but only viewed them as I passe- are from twelve to eighteen inches. The town is capable of holding five hundred thousand souls ; the houses are from three to five stories . the shops and markets well pro- vided. The emperor's palace is in the centre of the city, where the two great streets meet. It is inclosed by a wall of two feet high, and twenty feet distance from the buildings. I had his majesty's permission to step over this wall ; and the space being so wide between that and the palace, I could easily view it on every side. The outward court is a square of forty feet, and includes two other courts : in the inmost are the royal apartments, which I was very desirous to see, but found it extremely difficult ; for the great gates, from one square into another, were but eighteen inches wide. Now the buildings of the outer court were at least five feet high, and it was impossible for me to stride over them with- out infinite damage to the pile, though the walls were strongly built of hewn stone, and four inches thick. At the same time the emperor had a great desire that I should see the magnificence of his palace ; but this I was not able to do till three days after, which I spent in cutting down with my knife some of the largest trees in the royal park, about a hundred yards distance from the city. Of these trees I made two stools, each about three feet high, and strong enough to bear my weight. The people having received notice a second time, I went again through the city to the palace with my two stools in my hands. When T came to the side of the outer court, I stood upon one stool and took the other in my hand ; this I lifted over the roof, and gently set it down on the space between the first oulliver's tkavels: ;concl court, which was eiglit feet wide. I then ped over the building very conveniently from one jol to the otlier, and drew up the first after me with a hooked stick. By this contrivance I got into the inmost court ; and, lying down upon my side, I applied my face to the windows of the middle stories, which were left open on purpose, and discovered the most splendid apartments that can be imagined. There I saw the empress and the young pr-ino^s, in their several lodgings, with their chief attendants about them. Her imperial majesty was pleased to smile very graciously upon me, and gave me out of the window her hand to kiss.* But I shall not anticij)ate the reader with further de- scriptions of this kind, because I reserve them for a greater work, which is now almost ready for the press; containing a general description of this empire, from its first erection, through a long series of princes ; with a particular account of their wars and politics, laws, learning and religion ; their plants and animals ; their peculiar manners and customs, with other matters very curious and useful ; my chief de- sign at present being only to relate such events and trans- actions as happened to the public or to myself during a residence of about nine months in that empire. One morning, about a fortnight after I had obtained my liberty, Reldresal, principal secretary (as they style him) for private affairs, came to my house attended only by one servant. He ordered his coach to wait at a distance, and desired I would give him an hour's audience ; which I readily consented to, on account of his quality and personal merits, as well as of the many good offices he had done me f The character of the empress is manifestly taken from that of Queen Anne — good-natured, but easily duped. A VOYAGE TO tilLLlPtTT. " 121 during my solicitations at court. I offered to lie down that lie might the more conveniently reach ray ear; but he chose rather to let me hold him in my hand during our conver- sation. He began with compliments on my liberty; said "he might, pretend to some merit in it;" but however added, " that if it had not been for the present situation of tilings at court, perhaps I might not have obtained it so soon. For," said he, "as flourishing a condition as we may appear to be in to foreigners, we labor under two mighty evils ; a violent faction at home, and the danger of an in- vasion, by a Inost potent enemy, from abroad. As to the first, you are to understand, that for above seventy moons past there have been two struggling parties in this empire, under the names of Tramechsan and SlamecJisan* from the high and low heels of their shoes, by which they distinguish themselves. It is alleged, indeed, that the high-heels are most agreeable to our ancient constitution ; but, however this be, his majesty has determined to make use only of low heels in the administration of the government, and all offices in the gift of the. crown, as you cannot but observe : and particularly that his majesty's imperial heels are lower at least by a di^urr than any of his court [drurr is a mea- sure about the fourteenth part of an inch). The animosi- ties between these two parties run so high, that they will neither eat nor drink nor talk with each other. We com- pute the Tramechsan, or high heels, to exceed us in num- ber ; but the power is wholly on our side. We apprehend * High-church and Low-church, or Whig and Tory. As every ac- cidental difference between man and man in person and circumstances is by this work rendered extremely contemptible; so speculative differences are shown to be equally ridiculous, when the zeal with which they are opposed and defended too much exceeds their import- ance. — Hawkaworth. 122 GtLLTVER's TRAVELS: liis imperial highness, the heir to the crown, to. have some iendencty towarfls the high heels ; at least, we can plainly discover that one of his heels is higher than the other, which gives him a iiobble in his gait.* Now, in the midst of these intestine disquiets, we are threatened with an in- vasion from the island of Blefuscu, which is the other great empire of the universe, almost as large and powerful as this of his majesty. For as to what we have heard you affirm, that there are other kingdoms and states in the world inhabited by human creatures as large as yourself, our philosophers are .in much doubt, and would rather con- jecture that you dropped from the moon, or one of the stars ; because it is certain that a hundred mortals of your bulk would in a sliort time destroy all the fruits and cattle of his majesty's dominions : besides, our histories of six thou- sand moons make no mention of any other regions than the two great empires of Lilliput and Blefuscu. Which two mighty powers have, as I was going to tell you, been engaged in a m.'st obstinate war for six-and-thirty moons past. It began upon the following occasion : it is allowed on all hands, that the primitive. way of breaking eggs, be- fore we eat them, was upon the larger end ; but his present * George, Prince of Wales, afterwards George II, was at this time vehement in his hostility to his father's ministers; like all heirs-ap- parent since the accession of the house of Brunswick, he chose his political friends among the parties most opposed to the court, calling around him both the discontented "Whigs and the displaced Tories. "We learn from a letter of Mrs. Howard, that the Prince was greatly amused at this description of his hobbling between the two political parties. On his accession to the throne, which took place shortly nfter the publication of Gulliver, he was easily induced by Queen Caroline to continue Sir Robert "Walpole at the head of affairs ; an unexpected change, which greatly disappointed Swift and his friends. A VOYAGE TO tilLLIPUT. 123 majesty's grandfather, while he was a boy, going to eat an (■.(TIT, and breaking it according to the ancient practice, hap- pened to cut one of his fingers ; whereupon the emperor, Ills father, published an edict, commanding all his subjects, upon great penalties, to break the smaller end of the eggs.* The people so highly resented this law, that our histories tell us, there have been six rebellions raised on that ac- count ; wherein one emperor lost his life,t and another his crovvn.| These civil commotions were constantly fomented by the monarchs of Blefuscu ; and when they were quelled, the exiles always fled for refuge to that empire. It is com- puted that eleven thousand persons have at several times suffered death, rather than submit to break their eggs at the smaller end. Many hundred large volumes have been published upon this controversy : but the books of the Big- endians have been long forbidden, and the whole party rendered incapable by law of holding employments. Dur- ing the course of these troubles, the emperors of Blefuscu did frequently expostulate by their ambassadors, accusing us of making a schism in religion by offending against a fundamental doctrine of our great prophet Lustrog, in the fifty-fourth chapter of the Blundecral, which is their Alco- ran. This, however, is thought to be a mere strain upon the text; for the words are these: that all true believers break their eggs at the convenient end; and which is the convenient end *eems, in my humble opinion, to be left to * The oontroversy respecting the sacraments between the Eoraish and Anglican churches Is humorously portrayed in the dispute about the proper end of breaking the egg. The emperor who cut his fingers is mnnifestly Henry VIII, who was so sadly perplexed bj the sacra- ment of marriage and the difficulty of divorce. t Charles I. J James II. 124 Gulliver's travels: every man's conscience, or at least in the power of the chief magistrate to determine.* " Now, the Big-endian exiles have found so much Credit in the emperor of Blofuscu's court, and so much private aHsistance and encouragement from their party here at home, that a bloody war has been carried on between the two enjpires for six-and-thirty moons, with various success* during which time we have lost forty capital ships, and a much greater nnmber of smaller vessels, together with thirty thousand of our best seamen and soldiers; and the damage received by the enemy is reckoned to be somewhat greater than ours.f However, they have now equipped a numerous fleet, and are just preparing to make a descent upon us; and his imperial majesty, placing great confidence in your valor and strength, has commanded me to lay this account of his affairs before you." I desired the secretary to present my humble duty to the emperor; and to let him know, "that I thought it would * Swift appears to intimate that the great point at ifsue between the Romish and English churches, the sacrament of the Eucharist, has been decided too positively by the theologians on both sides ; he inti- mates that the question of transubstantiation should be left open to the faith of the receiver, in accordance with the memorable lines of Queen Elizabeth. Christ was the word that spake it. He took the bread, and brake it; And what that word did make it, That I believe and take' it. f This description of the Big-endian war is designed for the wars of the revolution, which were terminated by the peace of Utrecht, and the enumeration of the losses and sbiusjhter occasioned by the war is intended to vindicate Harley and Bolingbroke for bringing it to a conclusion. A VOTAGK TO LILLIPUT. 125 not become me, who was a foreigner, to interfere with par- ties; but I was ready, with the hazard of my life, to defend his person and state against all invaders."* * Gulliver, without examining the subject of dispute, readily en- gaged to defend the emperor against invHsion, because he knew that no such monarch had a right to invade the dominions of another, for the propagation of truth. — Mawkaworth. 126 (iULLIVER'S TKAVELS CHAPTER V. THK AUTHOR, BY AN KXTRAORDINARY STRATAGEM, PREVENTS AN INVASION — A HIGH TITLE OK HONOR IS CONFERRED UPON HIM — AMBASSADORS ARRIVE FROM THE EMPEROR OF BLEFUSCU, AND SUE FOR PKACE — THE EMPRESS'S APARTMENTS ON FIRE BT ACCI- DENT ; THE AUTHOR INSTRUMENTAL IN SAVING THE REST OF THE PALACE. 'lILLIPUT is part of the continent, but the em- pire of Blefuscu is an island situated to the northeast of the mainland, from which it is parted only by a channel of eight hundred yards wide, 1 had not yet seen it, and upon this notice of an intended invasion, I avoided appearing on that side of the coast, for fear of being discovered by some of the enemy's ships, who had received no intelligence of me ; all inter- course between the two empires having been strictly for- bidden during the war, upon pain ot death, and au embargo laid by our emperor upon all vessels whatsoever. I com- municated to his majesty a project I had formed of seizing the enemy's whole fleet ; which, as our scouts assured us, lay at anchor in the harbor, ready to sail with the first fair wind. I consulted the most experienced seamen upon the depth of the channel, which they had often plumbed; who told me, that in the middle, at high water,-it was sev- enty glumghiffs deep, which is about six feet of European measure; and the rest of it fifty glumcjluffs at most. I walked towards the northeast coast, over against Blefuscu; A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 127 where, lying down behind a hillock, I took out my small perspective glass, and viewed the enemy's fleet at anchor, consisting of about fifty men-of-war, and a great number of transports : I then came back to my house, and gave orders (for which I had a warrant) for a great quantity of the strongest cable and bars of iron. The cable was about as thick as packthread, and the bars of the length and size of a knitting-needle. I trebled the cable to make it stronger, and for the same reason, I twisted three of the iron bars together, bending the extremities into a hook. Having thus fixed fifty hooks to as many cables, I went back to the northeast coast, and putting off my coat, shoes, and stockings, walked into the sea in my leathern jerkin, about half an hour before high water. I waded with what haste I could, and swam in the middle about thirty yards, till I felt ground. I arrived at the fleet in less than half an hour. The enemy were so frighted when they saw me, that they leaped out of their ships, and swam to shore, where there could not be fewer than thirty thousand souls : I then took ray tackling, and fastening a hook to the hole at the prow of each, I tied all the cords together at the end. While I was thus employed, the enemy discharged several thousand arrows, many of which stuck iu my hands and face; and, besides the excessive smart, gave me much disturbance in my work. My greatest apprehension was for mine eyes, which I should have infallibly lost, if I had not suddenly thought of an expedient. I kept, among other little neces- saries, a pair of spectacles in a private pocket, which, as I observed before, had escaped the emperor's searchers. These I took out and fastened as strongly as I could upon niy nose, and thus armed, went on boldly with my work, in spite of the enemy's arrows, many of which struck against the glasses of my spectacles, but without, any other effect, 128 Gulliver's travels: farther than a little to discompose them. I had now fas- tened all the hooks, and taking the knot in my hand, began to pull ; but not a ship would stir, for they were all too fast held by their anchors, so that the boldest part of my enter- prise remained. I therefore let go the cord, and leaving the hooks fixed to the ships, I resolutely cut with my knife the cables that fastened the anchors, receiving about two hundred arrows in my face and hands ; then I took up the knotted end of the cables, to which my hooks were tied, and with great ease drew fifty of the enemy's largest men- of-war after me. The Blefuscudians, who had not the least imagination of what I intended, were at first confounded with aston- ishment. They had seen me cut the cables, and thought my design was only to let the ships run adrift, or fall foul on each other ; but when they perceived the whole fleet moving in order, and saw me pulling at the end, they set up such a scream of grief and despair as it is almost im- possible to describe or conceive.* When I had got out of danger, I stopped awhile to pick out the arrows that stuck in my hands and face ; and rubbed on some of the same ointment that was given me at my first arrival, as I have formerly mentioned. I then took off my spectacles, and waiting about an hour till the tide was a little fallen, I waded through the middle with my cargo, and arrived safe at the royal port of Lilliput. The Emperor and his whole court stood on the shore, expecting the issue of this great adventure. They saw * The capture of the Blefuscudian fleet is intended to represent the efforts made by the Tory ministry to secure the naval supremacy of England in the negotiations at Utrecht, anil particularly their success in procuring the demolition of Dunkirk, and the cession of several French colonies. A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 129 the ships move forward in a large half-moon, but could not discern me, who was up to my breast in water. When I advanced to. the "middle of the channel, they were yet more in pain, because I was under water to my neck. The em- peror concluded me to be drowned, and that the enemy's fleet was approaching in a hostile manner : but he was soon eased of his fears ; for the channel growing shallower every step I made, I came in a short time within hearing, and holding up tlie end of the cable, by which the fleet was fastened, I cried in a loud voice, " Long live the most puissant king of Lilliput!" This great prince received me at my landing with all possible encomiums, and created me SL.nardaG upon the spot, which is the highest title of honor among them.* * The treaty at Utrecht was at first very popular with the English people ; and it was regarded by Queen Anne as a blessing to Eng- land and to Europe. The promised demolition of Dunkirk, and its surrender as a guarantee to General Hill, were regarded not only by the court, but by the nation, as an advantage scarcely inferior to what the capture of the Blefuscudian fleet would have been to the emperor of Lilliput. Swift wrote a song on the event, which waa very popular. The following are the concluding stanzas : Our merchant ships may cut the line. And not bo snapped by privateers ; And commoners who love good wine, Will drink it now as well as peers ; Landed men shall have their.rent. Yet our stocks rise cent, per cent. ; The Dutch from hence shall no more millions drain; We'll bring on us no more debts, Nor with bankrupts fill gazettes : And the Queen shall enjoy her own again. The towns we took ne'er did us good : What signified the French to beat? 130 GULLIVER'S TRAVELS: His majesty desired I would take some other opportunity of bringing all the rest of his enemy's ships into his ports. And so unmeasurable is the ambition of' princes, that he seemed to think of nothing less than reducing the whole empire of Blefuscu into a province, and governing it by a viceroy ; of destroying the Big-endian exiles, and compel- ling that people to break the smaller end of their eggs, by which he would remain the sole monarch of the whole world. But I endeavored to divert him from this design, by many arguments drawn from the topics of policy as well as justice; and I plainly protested, "that I would never be an instrument of bringing a free and brave people into slavery •" and when the matter was debated in coun- cil, the wisest part of the ministry was of my opinion.* This open, bold declaration of mine was so opposite to the schemes and politics of his imperial majesty, that he We spent our money and our blood To make the Dutchmen proud and great: But the lord of Oxford swears Dunkirk never shall be theirs ; The Dutch-hearted Whigs may rail and complain ; But true Englishmen may fill A health to General Hill, For the Queen now enjoys her own again. * The conquest of France was seriously believed feasible by many friends of the Duke of Marlborough ; but when the siege of such a petty fortress as Bouchain occupied the greater part of one campaign, the best English statesmen saw there was little chance of such a consummation. Mesnager, if the memoirs published in his name bo not a forgery, declares that the Tories used to annoy the Whigs by asking, " How long will it take to conquer France at the rate of a Bouchain per summer 7" In the debates on the treaty of Utrecht {A,D. 1713), the advocates for peace had decidedly the best of the argument, so that Gulliver is justified in saying that ' the wisest were of his opinion. ' ' A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 131 could never forgive me. He mentioned it in a very artful manner at council, where I was told that some of the wisest appeared at least, by their silence, to be of my opinion ; but others, who were my secret enemies, could aot forbear < some expressions which by a side wind reflected on me ; and from this time began an intrigue between his majesty, and a junto of ministers, maliciously bent against me, which broke out in less than two months, and had like to have ended in my utter destruction. Of so little weight are the greatest services to princes, when put into the bal- ance with a refusal to gratify their passions. About three weeks after this exploit there arrived a sol- emn embassy from Blefnscu, with humble offers of a peace; which was soon concluded, upon conditions very advan- tageous to our emperor, wherewith I shall not trouble the reader. There were six ambassadors with a train of about five hundred persons ; and their entry was very magnifi- cent, suitable to the grandeur of their master and the im- portance of their business. When their treaty was finished, wherein I did them several good offices by the credit I now had, or at least appeared to have, at court, their excellen- cies, who were privately told how much I had been their friend, made me a visit in form. They began with many compliments upon my valor and generosity, invited me to that kingdom in the emperor their master's name, and desired me to show them some proofs of my prodigious strength, of which they had heard so many wonders : wherein I readily obliged them, but shall not trouble the reader Avith the particulars. When I had for some time entertained their excellencies, to their infinite satisfaction and surprise, I desired they would do me the honor to present my most humble re- spects to the emperor their master, the renown of whose 132 aULLIVEE'S TRAVELS: virtues had so justly filled the whole world with admira- tion, and whose royal person I resolved to attend before I returned to my own country. Accordingly, the next time I had the honor to see our emperor, I desired his general license to wait on the Blefuscudian monarch, which he was jjleased to grant me, as I could perceive, in a very cold manner ; but could not guess the reason, till I had a whisper from a certain person, " that Flimnap and Bolgo- lara had represented my intercourse with those ambassa- dors as a mark of disaffection ;" from which I am sure my heart was wholly free. And this was the first time I began to conceive some imperfect idea of courts and ministers.* It is to be observed, that these ambassadors spoke to me by an interpreter, the languages of both empires differing as much from each other as any two in Europe, and each nation priding itself upon the antiquity, beauty, and energy of their own tongue, with an avowed contempt for that of their neighbor: yet our emperor, standing upon the ad- vantage he had got by the seizure of their fleet, obliged them to deliver their credentials, and make their speech, in the Lilliputian tongue. And it must be confessed, that from the great intercourse of trade and commerce between both realms, from the continual reception of exiles which is mutual among them, and from the custom, in each em- pire, to send their young nobility and richer gentry to the * The charge raised ajjainst Gulliver for his innocent inter rso with the ambassadors from Blefuscu alludes to the chief accusation brought against Bolingbroko (A.D. 1715), which was his treasonable intimacy with the French ministers during the negotiations of the peace at Utrecht. Bolingbroko's journey to France to negotiatn a separate peace, and his clandestine intercourse with the agents of Louis, were, however, of such a suspicious nature, that he did not think it prudent to wait for his trial. A VOYAGE! TO LiLtilPDT. 133 Other, in order to polish themselves by seeing the world, and understanding men and manners ; there are few per- sons of distinction, or merchants, or seamen, who dwell in the maritime parts, but what can hold conversation in both tongues ; as I found some weeks after, when I went to pay my respects to the emperor of Blefuscu, which, in the midst of great misfortunes, through the malice of my enemies, proved a very happy adventure to me, as I shall relate in its proper place. The reader may remember, that when I signed those articles upon which I recovered my liberty, there Avei-e some which I disliked, upon account of their being too servile ; neither could anything but an extreme necess-ity have forced me to submit. But being now a nardao of the highest rank in that empire, such offices were looked upon as below my dignity, and the emperor (to do him justice) never once mentioned them to me. However, it was not long before I had an opportunity of doing his majesty, at least as I then thought, a most signal service. I was alarmed at midnight with the cries of many hundred people at my door ; by which, being suddenly awaked, I was in some kind of terror. I heard the word burgJum repeated incessantly : several of the emperor's court, making their way through the crowd, entreated me to come immediately to the palace, where her imperial majesty's apartment was on fire, by the carelessness of a maid of honor, who fell asleep while she was reading a romance. I got up in an instant; and orders being given to clear the way before me, and it being likewise a moonshine night, I made a shift to get to the palace without trampling on any of the people. I found they had already applied ladders to the walls of the apartment, and were well provided with buckets, but the water Mas at some distance. These buckets were about 134 gulliver'b travels; the size of a large thimble, and the poor people supplied nic with them as fast as tlicy cnukl ; but the flume was so violent that they did little good. I might easily have stifled it with my coat, which I unfortunately left behind me for haste, and came away only in my leathern jerkin. The case seemed wholly desperate and deplorable; and this magnificent palace would have infallibly been burnt down to the ground, if, by a presence of mind unusual to me, I had not suddenly thought of an expedient. I had the evening before drunk plentifully of a most delicious wine called glimigrim (the Blefuscudians call it flmiec), but ours is esteemed the better sort, which is very diuretic. By the luckiest chance in the world, I had not discharged my- self of any part of it. The heat I had contracted by coming very near the flames, and by laboring to quench them, made the wine begin to operate by urine, which I voided in such a quantity, and applied so well to the proper places, that in three minutes the fire was wholly extinguished, and the rest of that noble pile, which had cost so many ages in erecting, preserved from destruction. It was now daylight, and I returned to my house with- out waiting to congratulate with the emperor; because, although I had done a very eminent piece of service, yet I could not tell how his majesty might resent the manner by which I had performed it: for, by the funtlamental laws of the realm, it is capital in any person, of M-hat quality so- ever, to make water within the precincts of the palace. But I was a little comforted by a message from his majesty, "that he would give orders to the grand justiciary for pass- ing my pardon in form;'' which, however, I could not obtain; and I was privately assured, that the empress, conceiving the great-est abhorrence of what I had done, re- moved to the most distant side of the court, firmly resolved A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 135 that those buildings should never be repaired for her use; and, in the presence of her chief confidants, could not for- bear vowing revenge.* * Swift, in this description of the empress's hostility on account of his indecency, and her forgetfulness of the essential service which ho had rendered, alludes to the prejudices of Queen Anne, who was more indignant at the immorality of his writings than grateful for his sup- port of her favorite ministry. The Queen had actually nominated Swift to an English bishopric, when Dr. Sharp, Archbishop of York, went to the Queen, showed her the "Tale of a Tub," and declared that the author of such a work could not be made u, prelate without bringing disgrace on the church. Hence Swift, in the lines on him- self, complains that he is By an old pursued, A crazy prelate and a royal prude. And again, York is from Lambeth sent to show the Queen, A dangerous treatise writ against the spleen. Which, by the style, the matter, and the drift, 'Tis thought could be the work of none but Swift. The Archbishop was eagerly seconded by the Duchess of Somerset, whom Swift had bitterly lampooned. The Queen could never after- wards be persuaded to revoke her determination, and Swift thence- forth always spoke of her in terms of contempt. 186 GULLIVEB S TRAVELS'. CHAPTER VI.* OF THE INHABITANTS O? LILLIPUT ; THKYR LEARNING, LAWS, AND CUSTOMS ; THE MANNER OP EDUCATING THEIR CHILDREN — THE author's way of LITING IN THAT COUNTRY — HIS VINDICATION OF A GREAT LADY. 'UARRELS and intrigues are so common in courts, that I need not dwell on the calumnies devised by the envious to prejudice the mind of the empress still further against me, and I shall therefore turn to a different subject. Although I in- tend to leave the description of this empire to a particular treatise, yet, in the meantime, I am content to gratify the curious reader with some general ideas. As the common size of the natives is somewhat under six inches high, so there is an exact proportion in all other animals, as well * In fi German critique on Gulliver's Travels, this chapter has been rather severely censured, because the author has neglected to give any partioulars of the Lilliputian climate and its effects; a source from wliich the reviewer avers, that many circumstances, might have been deduced which would give an additional plausibility to the narrative. It must be observed, however, in Swift's justification, that this ne- glect of observing climate and its peculiarities is common to all the early narratives of voyagers, and also that for the purposes of his satire it was necessary to identify the Lilliputian climate with that of England. A VOifAGE TO LILLIPtfT. tST as plants and trees : for instance, the tallest horses and oxen are between four and five inches in lieight, the sheep an ineh and a half, more or less ; their geese about the bigness of a sparrow, and so the several gradations downwards, till you come to the smallest, which to my sight were almosl invisible; but nature has adapted the eyes of the Lillipu- tians to all objects proper for their view ; they see with great exactness, but at no great; distance. And to show the shari)ness of their sight towards objects that are near, I have been much pleased with a cook pulling a lark, which was not so large as a common fly ; and a young girl thread- ing an invisible needle with invisible silk. Their tallest trees are about seven feet high : I mean some of those in the great royal park, the tops whereof I could but just reach with my fist clenched. The other vegetables are in the same proportion ; but this I leave to the reader's imagination. I shall say but little at present of their learning, which for many ages has flourished in all its branches among them; but their manner of writing is very peculiar, being neither from the left to the right, like the Europeans; nor from the right to the left, like the Arabians ; nor from up to down, like the Chinese; but aslant, from one corner of the paper to the other, like ladies in England. Tiiey bury their dead with their heads directly down- ward, because they holdan opinion that in eleven thousand moons they are all to rise again ; in which period the earth (whjch they conceive to be flat) will turn upside down, and by this means they shall, at their resurrection, be found ready standing on their feet. The learned among them confess the absurdity of this doctrine ; but the prac- tice still continues, in compliance to the vulgar. There are some laws and customs in this empire very 138 aulliver's travels: ])ccu]iar ; and iPtliey were not so directly contrary to thos9 of my own dear country, I should Le tempted to say a little ill their justification. It is only to be wished they were as well executed. The first I shall mention, relates to in-' formers. All crimes against the state are punished here with the utmost severity ; but if the person accused makes his innocence plainly to appear upon his trial, the aceaser is immediately put to an ignominious death; and out of his goods or lands the iimocent person is quadruply recom- pensed for the loss of his time, for the danger he under- went, for the hardship of his imprisonment, and for all the ciiarges he has been at in making his defence ; or, if that fund be deficient, it is largely supplied by the crown. The emperor also confers on him some public mark of his favor, and proclamation is made of his innocencfr through the whole city. They look upon fraud as a greater crime than theft, and therefore seldom fail to punish it with death ; for they allege, that care and vigilance, with a very common under- standing, may preserve a man's goods from thieves, but honesty has no fence against superior cunning ; and since it is necessary that there should be a perpetual intercourse of buying and' selling, and dealing upon credit, where fraud is i:)ermitted and connived at, or has no law to punish it, the honest dealer is always undone, and the knave gets the advantage. I remember, when I was once interceding with the king for a criminal who had wronged his master of a great sum of money, which he had received by order, and ra-n away with ; and happening to tell his majesty by way of extenuation, that it was only a breach of trust, the emperor thought it monstrous in me to offer as a defence the greatest aggravation of the crime; and truly I had little to say in return, farther than the common answer, A VOYAaE TO LtLLlPtT. 139 that different nations had different customs ; for, I confess T was licartily ashamed.* Although we call rewards and punishments the two hinges upon which all government turns, yet I could never observe this maxim to be put in practice by any nation, except that of Lilliput. Whoever can. there bring suffi- cient proof that he has strictly observed the laws of hh country for seventy-three moons, has a claim to certain privileges, according to his quality and condition of life, with a proportionable sum of money out of a fund appro- priated for that use : he likewise acquires the title of snil- pall, or legal, which is added to his name, but does not descend to his posterity. And these people thought it a prodigious defect of policy among us, when I told them that our laws were enfoKced only by penalties, without any mention of reward. It is upon this account that the image of Justice, in their courts of j udicature, is formed with six eyes, two before, as many behind, and on each side one, to signify circumspection ; with a bag of gold open in her right hand, and a sword sheathed in her left, to show that she is more disposed to reward than to punish. In choosing persons for all employments, they have more regard to good morals than to great abilities ; for, since government is necessary to mankind, they believe that the common size of human understanding is fitted to some station or other ; and that Providence never intended to make the management of public affairs a mystery to be comprehemded only by a few persons of sublime genius, of which there seldom are three born in an age : but they sup- pose truth, justice, temperance, and the like, to be in every * An act of Piirlinment has been since passed, by which some breaches of trust have been made capital. —Orig. 140 Gulliver's travels: man's power; the practice of whicli virtues, assisted by cxpcriencn and a good intention, would qualify any man for the service of his country, except wliere a course of study is required. But they thought tlie want of moral virtues was so far from being supplied by superior endow- ments of the mind, that employments could never be put into such dangerous hands as those of persons so qualified; and at least, that the mistakes committed by ignorance, in a virtuous disposition, would never be of such fatal conse- quence to the public weal, as the practice of a man whose inclinations led him to be corrupt, and who had great abili- ties to manage, to multiply, and defend his corruptions. In like manner, the disbelief of a Divine Providence renders a man incapable of holding any public station ; for since kings avow themselves to be the deputies of Provi- dence, the Lilliputians think nothing can be more absurd than for a prince to employ such men as disown the authority under which he acts. In relating these and the following laws, I would only be understood to mean the original institutions, and not the most scandalous corruptions, into which these people are fallen by the degenerate nature of man. For, as to that infamous practice of acquiring great employments by danc- ing on the ropes, or badges of favor and distinction by • leaping over sticks and creeping under them, the reader is to observe that they were first introduced by the grand- father of the emperor now reigning, and grew to the pres- ont height by the gradual increase of party and faction.* Ingratitude is among them a capital crime, as We read it to have been in some other countries; for they reason thus: * The Riitlior alludes to the prostitution of honors, and the lavish distribution of titles, in the reign of James I. A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 141 that whoever makes ill returns to his benefactor, nmst needs be a common enemy to the rest of mankind, from whom he has received no obligation, and therefore such a man is not fit to live. Their notions relatirfg to the duties of parents and chil- dren differ extremely from ours. For since the conjunction of male and female is founded upon the great law of nature, in order to propagate and continue the species, the Lilli- putians will needs have it, that men and women are joined together, like other animals, by the motives of concupis- cence ; and that their tenderness towards their young pro- ceeds from the like natural principle: for which reason, they will never allow that a child is under any obligation to his father for begetting him, or to his mother for bring- ing him into the world : which, considering the miseries of human life, was neither a benefit in itself, nor intended so by his parents, whose thoughts, in their love encounters, were oiherwise employed.* Upon these, and the like rea- sonings, their opinion is, that parents are the last of all others to be trusted with the education of their own chil- dren ; and therefore they have in every town public nur- series, wliere all parents, except cottagers and laborers, are obliged to send their infants of both sexes to be reared and educated, when they come to the age of twenty moons, at which time they are supposed to have some rudiments of docility. These schools are of several kinds, suited to dif- ferent qualities and both sexes. They have certain profes- sors well skilled in preparing children for such a condition of life as befits the rank of their parents, and their own * Sir Walter Scott is of opinion tlint this idea is borrowed from Cyrano Bergerac's Voyage to the Moon, where he finds a people with whom it was the rule that parents should obey their children. 142 Gulliver's tbavels: capacities, as well as inclinations. I shall first say some- thing of the male nurseries, and then of the female. The nurseries for males of noble or eminent birth, are provided with grave and learned professors, and their sev- eral deputies. The clothes and food of the children are plain and simple. They are bred up in the prin<;iples of honor, justice, courage, modesty, clemency, religion, and love of their country; they are always employed in some business, except in the times of eating and sleeping, which are very short, and two hours for diversions, consisting of bodily exercises. They are dressed by men till four years of age, and then are obliged to dress themselves, although their quality be ever so great; and the women attendants, who are aged proportionably to ours at fifby, perform only the most menial offices. They are never suffered to con- verse with servants, but go together, in smaller or greater numbers, to take their diversions, and always in the pres- ence of a professor or one of his deputies; M'hereljy they avoid those early bad imj)ressions of folly and vice, to which our children are subject. Their parents are suffered to see them only twice a year; the visit is to last but au hour; they are allowed to kiss the child at meeting and parting; but a professor, who always stands by on those occasions, will not suffer them to whisper, or use any fondling expressions, or bring any presents of toys, sweet- meats, and the like. The jjension from each family for the education and en- tertainment of a child, upon failure of due payment, is levied by the emperor's officers. The nurseries for children of ordinary gentlemen, mer- oliants, traders, and limidicrafts, are managed proportion- ably after the same manner ; only those designed for trades are put out apprentices at eleven years old : whereas those A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 143 of persons of quality continue in their exercises till fifteen, wliicli answers to twenty-one with us ; but tlie confinement is gradually lessened for the last three years. In the female nurseries, the young girls of quality are educated much like the males, only they are dressed by orderly servants of their own sex; but always in the pres- ence of a professor or deputy, till they come to dress them- selves, which is at five years old. And if it be found that these nurses ever presume to entertain the girls with fright- ful or foolish stories, or the common follies practiced by chambermaids among us, they are publicly whipped thrice about the city, imprisoned for a year, and banished for life to the most desolate part of the country. Thus the young ladies there are as much ashamed of being cowards and fools as the men, and despise all personal ornaments, beyond decency and cleanliness: neither did I perceive any difference in their education made by their difference of sex, only that the exercises of the females were not alto- gether so robust; and that some rules were given them relating to domestic life, and a smaller compass of learn- ing was enjoined them : for their maxim is, that among people of quality, a wife should be always a reasonable and agreeable companion, because she cannot always be young. When the girls are twelve years old, which among them is the marriageable age, their parents or guardians take them home, with great expressions of gratitude to the professors, and seldom without the tears of the young lady and her companions. In the' nurseries of the females of the meaner sort, the children are instructecf in all kinds of work projicr for their sex, and tlieir several degrees; those intended for ap- prentices arc dismissed at seven years old, the rest are kept until eleven. 14.4: GULLIVER S TRAVELS: The meaner families who have children at these nurse- ries are obliged, beside their annual pension, which is as low as possible, to return to the steward of the nursery a small monthly share of their gettings, to be a portion for the child; and therefore all jiarents are limited in their expenses by the law. For the Lilliputians think nothing can be more unjust, than for people, in subservience to their own appetites, to bring children into the world, and leave the burden of supporting them on the public. As to persons of quality, they give security to appropriate a certain sum for each child, suitable to their condition : and these funds are always managed with good husbandry and the most exact justice. The cottagers and laborers keep their children at home, their business being only to till and cultivate the earth, and therefore their education is of little consequence to the public : but the old and diseased among them are sup- ported by hospitals ; for begging is a trade unknown in this empire. And here it may, perhaps, divert the curious reader, to give some account of my domestics, and ray manner of liv- ing in this country, during a residence of nine months and thirteen days. Having a hftad mechanically turned, and being likewise forced by necessity, I had made for myself a table and chair convenient enough, out of the largest trees in the royal park. Two hundred seamstresses were em- ployed to make me shirts and linen for my bed and table, all of the strongest and coarsest kind they could get, which, however, they were forced to quilt together in several folds, for the thickest was some degrees liner than lawn. Their linen is usually three inches wide, and three feet make a ])iece. The seamstresses took my measure as I lay oin the ground, one standing at my neck, and another at my mid- A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 145 leg, with a strong cord extended, that each held by the end, while a third measured the length of the cord with a rule an inch long. Then they measured my right thumb, and desired no more ; for by a mathematical computation, that twice round the thumb is once round" the wrist, and so on to the neck and the waist, and by the help of my old shirt, which I displayed on the ground before them for a pattern ; they fitted me exactly. Three hundred tailors were em- ployed in the same manner to make me clothes ; but they had another contrivance for taking my measure. I kneeled down, and they raised a ladder from the ground to my neck; upon this ladder one of them mounted, and let fall a plumb-line from my collar to the floor, which just an- swered the length of my coat ; but my waist and arms I measured myself. When my clothes were finished, which was done in my house (for the largest of theirs would not have been able to hold them), they looked like the patch- work made by the ladies in England, only that mine were all of a color. I had three hundred cooks to dress my victuals, in little convenient huts built about my house, where they and their families lived, and prepared me two dishes apiece. I took up twenty waiters in my hand, and placed them on the table ; a hundred more attended below on the ground, some with dishes of meat, and some with barrels of wine and other liquors slung on their shoulders, all which the waiters above drew up, as I wanted, in a very ingenious manner by certain cords, as we draw a bucket up a well in Europe. A dish of their meat was a good mouthful, and a barrel of ^ their liquor a reasonable draught. Their mutton yields to ours, but their beef is excellent. I have had a sirloin so large, that I have been forced to make three bites of it; but this is rare. My servants were astonished to see me iO 146 auLLiVER's travels: eat it, bones and all, as in our country we do the leg of a lark. Their geese and turkeys I usually ate at a mouthful, and I confess they far exceed ours. Of their smaller fowl, I could take up twenty or thirty at the end of my knife. One day his imperial majesty, being informed of my way of living, desired "that himself and his royal consort, with the young princes of the blood of both sexes, might have the happiness," as he was pleased to call it, "of din- ing with me." They came accordingly, and I placed them in chairs of state,upon my table,just over against me, with their guards about them. Flimnap, the lord high-treas- urer, attended there likewise, with his wliite staflF; and I observed he often looked on me with a sour countenance, which I would not seem to regard, but ate more than usual, in honor to my dear country, as well as to fill the court with admiration. I have some private reasons to believe, that this visit from his majesty gave Flimnap an opportu- nity of doing me ill offices to his master. That minister had always been my secret enemy, though he outwardly caressed me more than was usual to the moroseness of his nature. He represented to the emperor " the low condi- tion of his treasury ; that he was forced to take up money at a great discount ; that excheqiier bills would not circu- late under nine per cent, below par ; that I had cost his majesty above a million and a half of sprugs (their greatest gold coin, about the bigness of a spangle) ; and, upon the whole, that it would be advisable in the emperor to take the first fair occasion of dismissing me."* I am here obliged to vindicate the re2)utatiou of an ex- *.Sir Kobei't Walpolo was often reproached with false economy, — no uncommon topic of railing against the "Whigs. The parsimoni- ous disposition cf George I has been already noticed. A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 147 cellent lady, who was an innocent sufferer on my account. The treasurer took a fancy to be jealous of his wife, from the malice of some evil tongues, who informed him that her Grace had taken a violent affection for my person, and the court scandal ran for some time, that she once came privately to my lodging. This I solemnly declare to be a most infamous falsehood, without any grounds, farther than that her Grace was pleased to treat me with all innocent marks of freedom and friendship. I own she came often to my house, but always publicly, nor ever without three more in the coach, who were usually her sister and young daughter, and some particular acquaintance ; but this was common to many other ladies of the court ; and I still ap- peal to my servants round, Avhether they at any time saw a coach at my door without knowing what persons were in it. On those occasions, when a servant had given me no- tice, my custom was to go immediately to the door; and after paying my respects, to take up the coach and two horses very carefully in my hands (for, if there were six horses, the postilion always unharnessed four), and placed them on a table, where I had fixed a movable rim quite round, of iive inches high, to prevent accidents ; and I have often had four coaches and horses at once on my table, full of company, while I sat in my chair, leaning my face towards them ; and when I was engaged with one set, the coachmen would gently drive the others round my table. I have passed many an afternoon very agreeably in these conversations. But I defy the treasurer, or his two in- formers (I will name them, and let them make the best of it), Clustril and Drunlo, to prove that any person ever came to me inoognito, except the secretary Reldresal, who was sent by express command of his iuiperial majesty, as I have before related, I should not have dwelt so long upon this 148 Gulliver's travels: particular, if it had not been a point wherein the reputation of a great lady is so nearly concerned,* to say nothing of my own; though I then had the honor to be a nardac, which the treasurer himself is not; for all the world knows that he is only a glumglwm, a title inferior by one degree, as that of a marquis is to a duke in England ; yet I allow he preceded me in right of his post. These false informa- tions, which I afterwards came to the knowledge of by an accident not proper to mention, made the treasurer sliow his lady for some time an ill countenance, and me a worse ; and although he was at last undeceived and reconciled to her, yet I lost all credit with him, and found my interest decline very fast with the emperor himself, who was, in- deed, too much governed by that favorite. * The Dean probably alludes to the inquiries made into Boling- broke's intrigues by the Committee of 1715, and particularly that which he was suspected of having formed with Madame Tencin. There are few passages in this work which can compete for grave and quiet humor with Gulliver's earnest defence of the lady's character. A VOYAGE TO LILLlPtTT. 149 CHAPTER VII. THE AITTHOB BEING INFORMED OF A DESIGN TO ACCUSE HIM OF HIGH TREASON, MAKES HIS -ESCAPE TO BLEFUSCU — HIS RECEPTION THERE. |FjStnN account of my leaving this kingdom may prop- ma^I erly be prefaced by some particulars of a private 7^ V intrigue which had been for two months form- ^^^' ing against me. I had been hitherto, all my life, a straziger to courts, for which I was unqualified by the meanness of my condition. I had indeed heard and read enough of the dispositions of great princes and minis- ters; but never expected to have found such terrible effects of them in so remote a country, governed, as I thought, by very different maxims from those in Europe. When I was just jjreparing to pay my attendance on the emperor of Blefuscu, a considerable person at court (to whom I had been very serviceable, at a time when he lay under the highest displeasure of his imperial majesty), came to my house very privately at night, in a close chair, and, without sending his name, desired admittance. The chair- men were dismissed : I put the chair, with his lordship in it, into my coat pocket; and giving orders to a trusty ser- vant, to say I was indisposed and gone to sleep, I fastened the door of my house, placed the chair on the table, accord- ing to my usual custom, and sat down by it. After the common salutations were over, observing his lordship's countenance full of concern, and inquiring into the reason, 160 Gulliver's travels: he desired "I would hear him with patience, in a matter that highly concerned my honor and my life." His s])eech was to the following effect, for I took notes of it as soon as he left me : "You are to know," said he, "that several committees of council have been lately called, in the most private manner, on your account; and it is but two days since his majesty came to a full resolution. . " You are very sensible that Skyresh Bolgolam {galbet, "or high-admiral) has been your mortal enemy, almost ever since your arrival. His original reasons I know not; but his hatred is increased since your great success against Ble- fuscu, by which his glory as admiral is much obscured. This lord, in conjunction with Flimnap, the high-treasurer, whose enmity against you is notorious on account of his lady, Limtoc the general, Lalcon the chamberlain, and Balmuff the grand justiciary, have prepared articles of impeachment against you, for treason and other capital crimes." This preface made me so impatient, being conscious of my own merits and innocence, that I was going to inter- rupt him ; when he entreated me to be silent, and thus pro- ceeded. " Out of gratitude for the favors you have done me, I procured information of the whole proceedings, and a copy of the articles ; * wherein I venture my head for your ser- * These articles ai-o designed to ridicslo the articles of impeachment against Oxford, Ormond, and Bolingbroke, in 1715. There were many who believed that, in consequence of the numer- ous victories obtained by the Duke of Marlborough and Prince Eu- gene, It would have been possible for the Allies to have marched to A VoYAGK to LiLLtPUT. 161 ARTICLES OF IMPEACHMENT AGAINST QUINBUS FLESTRIN, THE MAN-MOUNTAIN. Article 1. "tt)l)crea0, by a statute made in the reign of his im- perial majesty Calin Deffar Plune, it is enacted, that who- soever shall make water within the precincts of the royal palace, shall be liable to the pains and penalties of high- treason; notwithstanding, the said Quinbus Flestrin, in open breach of the said law, under color of extinguishing the fire kindled in the apartment of his majesty's most dear imperial consort, did maliciously, traitorously, and devilishly, by discharge of his urine, put out the said fire kindled in the said apartment, lying and being within the precincts of the said royal palace, against the statute in that case provided, etc., against the duty, etc. Paris, and compelled Louis XIV to purchase peace by the sacrifice of a large portion of his dominion. Swift so fkr yields to popular prej- udice as not to contest the possibility of such an exploit (here typified by the complete conquest of Blefusou) ; he takes the higher ground of national justice, and insinuates that if the Allies had violated the integrity of Prance, they would have been guilty of the very crime which furnished a pretext for their inveterate hostility to Louis 2IV. The frivolous and vexatious character of some of the articles of Gul- liver's impeachment is scarcely an exaggeration of the trivial nature of many of the charges brought against Queen Anne's last cabinet by the Walpole administration. 152 auLLiVEu's travels: Article 2.' "That the said Quinbus Flestrin having brought the imperial fleet of Blefuscii into tlie royal port, and being afterwards commanded by his imperial majesty to seize all the other ships of the said empire of Blefuscu, and reduce that empire to a province, to be governed by a viceroy from hence, and to destroy and put to death not only all the Big-endian exiles, but likewise all the people of that empire who would not immediately forsake the Big-endian heresy ; he, the said Flestrin, like a false traitor against his most auspicious, serene, imperial majesty, did petition to be excused from the said service, upon pretence of un- willingness to force the consciences, or destroy the liberties and lives of an innocent people.* Ahticlb 3. "That whereas certain ambassadors arrivea from the court of Blefuscu, to sue for peace in his majesty's court, he, the said Flestrin, did, like a false traitor, aid, abet, comfort, and divert the said ambassadors, although he knew them to be servants of a prince who was lately an open enemy to his imperial majesty, and in an open war against his said majesty. Article 4. "That the said Quinbus Flestrin, contrary to the duty of a faithful subject, is now preparing to make a voyage * A lawyer thinks himself honest, if he does the best he can for his client, and ii. statesman, if he promotes the interests of his country : but the Uean here inculcates a highor notion of right and wrong, and obligations to a larger community. — Hawksworth. A VOYAQE TO LlLLIPtT. 153 to til? oourt and empire of Blefiiscu, for whicli he has re- ceiveU only verbal license from his imperial majesty, and, under color of the said license, does falsely and traitorously intend to take the said voyage, and thereby to aid, com- fort, and abet the emperor of Blefuscu, so lately an enemy, and in open war with his imperial majesty aforesaid." " There are some other articles ; but these are the most important, of which I have read you an abstract. " In the several debates upon this impeachment, it must be confessed that his majesty gave many marks of his great lenity; often urging the services you had done him, and endeavoring to extenuate your crimes. The treasurer and admiral insisted that you should be put to the most pain- ful and ignominious death, by setting fire to your house at night ; and the general was to attend with twenty thousand men, armed with poisoned arrows, to shoot you on the face and hands. Some of your servants were to have private orders to strew a poisonous juice on your shirts and sheets, which would soon make you tear your own flesh, and die in the utmost torture. The general came into the same opinion, so that for a long time there was a majority against you; but his majesty resolving, if possible, to spare your life, at last brought off the chamberlain. "Upon this incident, Reldresal, principal secretary fo- private affairs, who always approved himself your true friend, was commanded by the emperor to deliver his opin- ion, which he accordingly did, and therein justified the good thoughts you have of him. He allowed your crimes to be great, but that still there was room for mercy, the most commendable virtue in a prince, and for which his majesty was so justly celebrated. He said, the friendship between you and him was so well known to the world that perhaps the most honorable board might think him par- 154 atJLtlVER'S TRAVEliSt tial ; however, in obedience to the command he had re- ceived, he would freely oifer his sentiments. That if his majesty, in consideration of your services, and pursuant to his own merciful disposition, would please to spare your, life, and only give orders to put out both your eyes, he humbly conceived that, by this expedient, justice might in some measure be satisfied, and all the world applaud the lenity of the emperor, as well as the fair and generous pro- ceedings of those who have the honor to be his counsellors. That the loss of your eyes would be no impediment to your bodily strength, by which you might still be useful to his majesty ; that blindness is an addition to courage, by con- cealing dangers from us ; that the fear you had for your eyes was the greatest difSculty in bringing over the enemy's fleet ; and it would be sufficient for you to see by the eyes of the ministers, since the greatest princes do no more.* " This proposal was received with the utmost disappro- bation by the whole board. , Bolgolam, the admiral, could not preserve his temper ; but rising up in a fury, saidj he wondered how the -secretary durst presume to give his opinion for preserving the life of a traitor : that the ser- vices you had performed were, by all true reasons of state, the great aggravation of your crimes ; that you, who was able to extinguish the fire by discharge of urine in her majesty's apartment (which he mentioned with horror), might, at another time, raise an inundation by the same * The pretended merciful council of Eeldresal, who proposed a commutation of punishm«nt, which, however, was worse than death, appears to be a satire on those Whigs who proposed that the Earl of Oxford and Lord Bolingbroke, instead of being impeached for high treason, and thus brought in peril of life, should only be accused of high mifdemeanors, which would justify their being deprived of title and estate, and sentenced to civil death. A VOYAGE TO LILLIPtJT. 155 means, to drown the whole palace ; and the same strength which enabled you to bring over the enemy's fleet, might serve, upon the first discontent, to carry it back: that he had good reasons to think you were a Big-endian in your heart; and, as treason begins in the heart before it appears in overt acts, so he accused you as a traitor on that account, and therefore insisted you should be put to death. " The treasurer was of the same opinion : he showed to what straits his majesty's revenue was reduced, by the charge of maintaining you, which would soon grow insup- portable: that the secretary's expedient of putting out your eyes, was so far from being a remedy against this evil, that it would probably increase it, as is manifest from the common practice of blinding some kind of fowls, after which they fed the fastet and grew sooner fat ; that his sacred majesty and the council, who are your judges, were, in their own consciences, fully convinced of your guilt, which was a sufficient argument to condemn you to death, without the formal proofs required by the strict letter of the law.* "But his imperial majesty, fully determined against capital punishment, was graciously pleaSfed to say, that since the council thought the loss of your eyes too easy a * There is something so odious in whatever is wrong, that even thoso whom it does not subject to punishment, endeavor to color it with an appearance of right; but the attempt is always unsuccessful, and only betrays a consciousness of deformity by showing a desire to hide it. Thus the Lilliputian court pretended a right to dispense with the strict letter of the law to put Gulliver to death, though by the strict letter of the law only he could be convicted of a crime ; the intention of the statute not being to suffer the palace rather to be burnt than so to be extinguished. — Hawksworth. 156 GITLIilVER's TRAVELS'. censure, some other may be inflicted hereafter.* And your friend the secretary, humbly desiring to be heard again, in answer to what the treasurer had objected, con- cerning the great charge his majesty was at in maintain- ing you, said, that his excellency, who had the sole dis- ])osal of the emperor's revenue, might easily provide against that evil, by gradually lessening your establish- ment; by which, for want of sufficient food, you will grow weak and faint, and lose your appetite, and consume in a few months; neither would the stench of your carcass be then so dangerous, when it should become more than half diminished; and immediately upon your death, five or six thousand of his majesty's subjects might, in two or three days, cut your flesh from your bones, take it away by cart-loads, and bury it in distant parts, to prevent in- fection, leaving the skeleton as a monument of admiration to posterity. " Thus by the great friendship of the secretary, the whole affair was compromised. It was strictly enjoined, that the project of starving you by degrees should be kept a secret; but the sentence of putting ou't your eyes was entered on the books; none dissenting, except Bolgolara the admiral, who, being a creature of the empress, was per- petually instigated by her majesty to insist upon your death, she having borne perpetual malice against you, on account of that infamous and illegal method you took to extinguish the fire in her apartment. " In three days your friend the secretary will be directed * This appears to be directed against the partial pardon which was granted to Lord Bolingbroke. George I could never be persuaded to restore him to his rights as a peer, though Bolingbroke bribed the Duchess of Kendal to use her powerful intercession, and actually in- duced her to place his memorial in the King's own hand. A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 157 to come to your house, and read before you the articles of iiupeaGhment; and then to signify the great lenity and favor of his majesty and council, whereby you arc only condemned to the loss of your eyes, which his majesty does not question you will gratefully and humbly submit to ; and twenty of his majesty's surgeons will attend, in order to see the operation well performed, by discharging very sharp- pointed arrows into the balls of your eyes, as you lie on the ground. " I leave to your prudence what measures you will take ; and to avoid suspicion, I must immediately return in as private a manner as I came." His lordship did so ; and I remained alone, under many doubts and perplexities of mind. It was a custom introduced by this prince and his min- istry (very different, as I have been assured, from the practice of former times), that after the court had decreed any cruel execution, either to gratify the monarch's resent- ment, or the malice of a favorite, the emperor always made a speech to his whole council, expressing his great lenity and tenderness as qualities known and confessed by all the world. This speech was immediately published through- out the kingdom ;* nor did anything terrify the people so much, as those encomiums on his majesty's mercy; be- cause it was observed that the more these praises were enlarged and insisted on, the more inhuman was the pun- ishment, and the sufferer more innocent. Yet as to myself, I must confess, having never been designed for a courtier, * Sir Walter Scott supposes that a sarcasm is intended here against the royal proclamations issued after the rebellion of 1715, but Swift more probably alludes to the King's speech at the opening of Parlia- ment, October 11th, 1722, wherein he informed both Houses of the conspiracy to restore the Pretender, in which Atterbury was involved. 158 GULLIVER'S travels: either hy my birth or education, I was so ill a judge of things, that I could not discover the lenity and favor of this sentence, but conceived it (perhaps erroneously) rather to be rigorous than gentle. I sometimes thought of stand- ing my trial; for, although I could not deny the facts al- leged in the several articles, yet I hoped they would admit of some extenuation. But having in my life perused many state trials, which I ever observed to terminate as the judges thought fit to direct, I durst not rely on so dangerous a de- cision, in so critical a juncture, and against such powerful enemies. Once, I was strongly bent upon resistance; for, while I had liberty, the whole strength of that empire could hardly subdue me, aud I might easily with stones pelt the metropolis to pieces ; but I soon rejected that pro- ject with horror, by remembering the oath I had n)ade to the emperor, the favors I received from him, and tlie high title of nardaa he conferred upon me. Neither had I so soon learned the gratitude of courtiers, to persuade myself that his majesty's present severities acquitted me of all past obligations.* At last I fixed upon a resolution for which it is probable I may incur some censure, and not uujlistly, for I confess I owe the preserving of mine eyes, and consequently my liberty, to my own great rashness and want of experience ; because, if I had then known the nature of princes and * Gulliver's defence of himself for escaping to Blefuscu is a covert apology for Bolingbroke's flight to France in 1715 ; a circumstance which was frequently quoted as decisive proof of his guilt, and cen- sured as an act of imprudence hy many who believed in his innocence. The Di'an insinuates that it was, like that of Gulliver, rendered nec- essary by the nuilico of the ministers of the day ; and it must be con- fessed that the mode in which the articles of impeachment were urged forward, gave too much reason to believe that Bolingbroke's death was predetermined by his accusers. A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT. 159 ministers, which I have since observed in many other courts, and their nietiiods of treating criminals less obnox- ious than myself, I should, with great alacrity and readi- ness, have submitted to so easy a punishment.* But hurried on by the precipitancy of youth, and having his imperial majesty's license to pay my attendance upon the emperor of Blefuscu, I took this opportunity, before the three days were elapsed, to send a letter to my friend, the secretary, signifying my resolution of setting out that morning for Blefuscu, pursuant to the leave I had got ; and, without waiting for an answer, I went to that side of the island where our fleet lay. I seized a large man-of-war, tied a cable to the prow, and lifting up the anchors, I stripped myseltj put my clothes (together with my coverlet, which I carried under my arm) into the vessel, and drawing it after me, between wading and swimming, arrived at the royal port of Blefuscu, where the people had long expected me ; they lent me two guides to direct me to the capital city, which is of the same name. I held them in my hands till I came within two hundred yards of^ the gate, and desired them " to signify my arrival to one of the secretaries, and let him kpow I there waited his majesty's command." I had an answer in about an hour, " that his majesty, attended by the royal family, and great officers of the court, was coming out to receive me." I advanced a hundred yards. * This bitter stroke of irony is directed against the acts of Parlia. ment by which Ormond, Bolingbrolrieties of speech by usage and custom, by familiarizing them with examples taken from the best writers, instead of burdening their memory with the complexities of syn- tax and the niceties of prosody. They are anxious that the teacher should be familiar and friendly with his pupils, nothing in their opinion being more adverse to a sound edu- cation than pedantry, and a morose affectation of dignity. They insist that the master should rather descend to the level of his scholar than aim at rising far above him ; and they believe that the former is a far more difficult acquire- ment than the latter, condescension requiring more tact, delicacy, and strength of mind, than the assumption of superiority. "They insist that teachers should endeavor rather to train youthful minds for the active pursuits of real life, than to load them with rare and curious stores of knowledge which are not capable of practical application. Conse- quently, they teach them from the outset to be prudent and discreet, so that in the very season of enjoyment they should know how to moderate their indulgence in pleasure. Is it not ridiculous, say they, to defer moral instruction to the very last^ to place ethics at the end, and not at the begin- ning of the course ; to keep people ignorant of the real na- tucfi and use of the enjoyments of life until the season when they can be best appreciated is past ; to teach the arts of life only when death is near at hand, and to point out the 12 178 APPENDIX TO LILLIPUT. proper purposes of existence, only when that existence is drawing to its close ? " They reward their children for a prompt and ready confession of their faults; and they bestow grace and favors on those who can give the best account and ex- planation of their errors. A great object of their system is to stimulate the curiosity of the young ; they encourage them to ask questions about everything they see and hear; and they punish severely those who have witnessed any extraordinary event or phenomenon without manifesting curiosity or astonishment. " They inculcate the most dutiful obedience and loyalty to the sovereign, but at the same time they exert themselves to prevent this feeling from degenerating into slavish sub- mission, by carefully distinguishing between the respect due to the station of governing power and the personal at- tachment which belongs only to individuals. They believe that the confusion of the two principles has often grievously wounded the conscience, exposed liberty to imminent dan- gers, and produced great misfortunes to states. " Lecturers on history take less trouble to teach their pupils the dates of events, than to explain the characters, the good and evil dispositions of kings, of generals, and of statesmen, and also to show how far their natural propen- sities may be supposed to have been modified by circum- stances. They believe that it is of little value to know that such a battle was fought in such or such a year ; but that it is important to consider what multitudes of men in every century have been barbarous, brutal, unjust, sangui- nary, always ready to throw away their own lives without necessity, and attack the lives of others without cause. How many wars have been waged which were positively disgraceful to humanity, and how powerful the motives APPENDIX TO LILLIPUT. 179 must have been that led to such fatal results. They deem the history of the progress of human intelligence the best of all histories, and they are anxious that their pupils should estimate facts rather than merely retain them in the memory. " They are anxious that a love for the sciences should be limited, and that each pupil should choose the branch of study most in accordance with his talents and inclinations ; they esteem a man who reads too much, as scarcely better than a man who eats too much ; asserting that the mind is subject to indigestion as well as the body. The emperor alone possesses a large and extensive library. The private bibliomaniacs who accumulate large collections of volumes, are contemptuously called ' donkeys laden with books.' "Philosophy with these people is a cheerful and lively study, not as with us, smothered beneath the solemn trifling and pedantic jargon of the schools. They know nothing of syllogisms, categories, first and second intentions, and the other cramboes and follies of dialectics. Their phil- osophy consists in establishing infallible principles, which lead the mind to prefer the moderate condition of an honest man to the riches and pride of a financier ; and they honor the victories obtained over the passions more than the greatest triumphs won by conquerors. It teaches them to live temperately, to avoid every species of voluptuous in- dulgence, to shun everything which tends»to render the mind dependent on th^ body, and thus destroys the free- dom of the understanding. "Pupils are exhorted to choose their future pursuits with great deliberation, and endeavors are made to guide them in the selection of the most suitable course ; less re- gard is paid to property than to intelligence, so that the sou of a laborer is often a minister of state, and the son of 180 APPENDIX TO LILLIPUT. a lord engaged in trade. Physics and mathematics are esteemed in Lilliput only so far as these sciences are profit- able to actual life and the progress of the useful arts. In general they have little anxiety to be acquainted with every part of the universe, and they prefer enjoying nature with- out examination to reasoning on the order and motion of physical bodies. With regard to metaphysics, they look upon the entire subject as the baseless fabric of a vision. " They hate all aflFectation in language and style, whether in verse or prose ; and they say that peculiarities of ex- pression are not less contemptible than peculiarities of dress. An author who quits the natural style to indulge in bombastic language, extraordinary metaphors, and quaint figures, is hissed and hooted through the streets, like a mask at the carnival. " The mind and body are cultivated at the same time by the Lilliputians ; for the object of education is to form a man, and therefore no part of his nature should be neglected. They compare the soul and body to two steeds yoked under a carriage, mischief must arise if one goes faster than the other. Whilst you devote your attention exclu- sively to the child's mind, say they, his figure may become distorted, his strength weakened, or his health injured ; if you only attend to the person, the mind lies fallow, and may soon be overgrown by the seeds of stupidity and ignorance. " It is forbidden to inflict any painful chastisement on children ; they are punished by Withholding some enjoy- ment, by shame, or by the privation of two or three les- sons ; the last mortifies them extremely, because they seem to be abandoned to themselves, and declared unworthy of instruction. Pain, in their opinion, tends only to reader children cowards, and timidity is a very prejudicial defect, which can rarely if ever be cured." 6t)E TO QUINBUS FLBSTRIN. 181 TO QUINBUS PLESTEIN, THE MAN-MOUNTAIN, an #?. BY TITTY TIT, ESQ. POET LAUREATE TO HIS MAJESTY OF LILLIPUT, In amaze, Lost, I gaze I Can our eyes Eeach thy size ? May my lays Swell with praise ' Worthy thee 1 Worthy me 1 Muse inspire All thy fire. Bards of old Of him told, When they said ' Atlas' head Propp'd the skies : See, and believe your eyes. See him stride Valleys wide: Over woods, Over floods, When he treads, Mountains' heads Groan and shake ; Armies quake. Lest his spurn Oferturn Man and steed : Troops take heed I 182 ODE TO QUINBtJS fLESTRIN. Left and right, Speed your flight ! Lest an host Beneath his foot be lost. Turn'd aside From his hide, Safe from wound Darts rebound ; From his nose Clouds he blows ; When he speaks, Thunder breaks 1 "When he eats. Famine threats ; When he drinks, !Neptune shrinks I Nigh thy ear, In mid air, On thy hand Let me stand. So shall I, Lofty poet, touch the sky. A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAG.* CHAPTEE I. A GREAT STORM DESCRIBED ; THE LONG BOAT SENT TO PBTCH WATER, THE AUTHOR GOES "WITH IT TO DISCOVER THE COUNTRY — HE IS LEFT ON SHORE, IS SEIZED BY ONE OF THE NATIVES, AND CAR- RIED TO A farmer's HOUSE — HIS R^ECEPTION, 'WITH SEVERAL ACCIDENTS THAT HAPPENED THERE — A DESCRIPTION OF THE INHABITANTS. IN active and restless life having been assigned me by nature and fortune, in two months after my return I again left my native country, and took shipping in the Downs, on the 20th day of June, 1702, in the Adventure, Captain John Nicholas, a Cornishman, commander, bound for Surat. We had a very * The existence of giants as a distinct race, superior in strength and stature to the rest of mankind, was long maintained as an article of faith, not merely by the ignorant and vulgar, but by men of learn- ing. According to the Rabbins, Adam was not only the first but the largest of mankind : they aflirm that when he was created, his stature was so gt^eat that his head reached the heavens. This so annoyed the angels that they remonstrated with the Creator, upon which God placed his hand on Adam's head, and he instantly shrank into one thousand cubits. When the Garden of Eden was disjoined from the rest of the w'vld, after the Fall, by the interposition of the ocean, they assert tl''°'t Adam waded through the depths to his new habita- ( 183 ) 184 GULLIVER *S TEAVELS; prosperous gale, till we arrived at the Cape of Good Hope, where we landed for fresh water ; but discovering a leak, tion, and that Eve accompanied him without fear of drowning; which she might well do, if, as the Mohammedan doctors tell us, when her head lay on a hill near Mecca, her knees rested on two others in the plain, more than two bowshots asunder. Not only Jewish but Christian writers have maintained that a gi- gantic antediluvian race was produced by the intercourse between " the sons of God " and " the daughters of men " (Gen. 6 : 5). And they aver that these giants were destroyed by the universal deluge. Hence the Douay version renders Job 26:5: " Behold the giants groan under the waters, and they that dwell with them. Hell is naked before them, and there is no cover for perdition." To this sublime version the following comment is added : " Giants were not able to wade in Noah's flood, but were drowned with the rest." The Rabbins, however, make an exception in favor of Og, king of Basan, compared to whom, according to their legends, all other giants were mere Lilliputians. The waters of the Deluge, they say, only reached to his knees, and he was alivff at the time of Exodus, when God de- stroyed him by the hand of Moses. For Og, perceiving the advance of the Israelites, whose army covered a space of nine miles, cut a stone out of a mountain, so wide that it would have covered the whole army, and he put it on his head that he might throw it upon them. But God sent a lapwing which pecked a hole through the stone, so that it slipped over Og's head, and hung round his neck like a necklace. The weight bore him to the ground on his face, and in this condition he was attacked by Moses. Moses was ten cubits in stature, and he took a spear ten cubits long, and threw it ten cubits high, and yet it only reached Og's heels. Moses, however, succeeded in slaying him ; and when he was dead, his body lay for a whole year, reaching as far as the river Nile in Egypt. The feats of the giants who warred against the gods are sufficiently known, and they may be passed over as purely mythological. But grave historians have recorded that Scandinavia was originally in- habited by giants, one of whom, according to Olaus Magnus, was an eminent poet; and, unlike the rest of the tuneful brotherhood, wrote against indulgence in love and wine. Britain, if we may trust Graf- ton's Chronicle, was similarly tenanted : " Brute with his companie after his first landing in the island of Totnesso, searched and travailed A VOYAdE TO BROBDINQNAjft- 185 We unshipped our goods, and wintered there ; for the captain falling sick of an ague, we could not leave the Cape till throughput all the land, and found the same to be marvellous ryche and plentifull of wood and pasture, and garnished with most goodly and pleasant ry vers and stremes ; and as he passed he was encoun- tered in sundry places with a great number of mightie and strong gyants, which at that time did inhabite the same." A belief in the existence of whole nations of giants is only now beginning to fade away before the gradual progress of geographical discovery. The ancients supposed that giants possessed the interior of Africa. In the time of Purchas (A.D. 1614), the Indians of Vir- ginia were supposed to belong to the race of Anak, for he gives the following account of a Virginian tribe, on the authority of Alexan- der Whitaker, an early traveller in these regions ; " The Sasquesa- hanockesarea giantly people, strange in proportion, behaviour, and altire, their voice sounding from them as out of a cave, their attire of bears' skins, hanged with bears' paws, the head of a wolf, and such like jewels; and (if any would have a spoone to eat with thedivele) their tobacco-pipes were three-quarters of a yard long, carved at the great end with a bird, beare, or other device, sufficient to beat out the brains of a horse (and how many asses' braines are beat out, or rather men's braines smoked out and asses' braines haled in, by our lesse pipes at home?), the rest of their furniture was suitable. The calf of one of their legges was measured three-quarters of a yard about, the rest of his limbs proportionable." The exaggerated accounts of the Patagonians, published by Magellan and Le Maii'e, had not been re- futed in Swift's time; so late as 1764, Commodore Byron declared that their stature filled him with astonishment. Hence Brobdingnag, considered merely as a fiction, did not seem so extravagant in the early part of the eighteenth as it does in the nineteenth century. Lucian in his True History, and Bishop Godwin in his whimsical account of Domingo Gonsales' journey to the moon, have introduced gigantic races into their fictions. It is very probable that Swift took his first hint of the Brobdingnaggians from the latter ; for, like the bishop, he associates mildness and gentleness with enormous stature. " Many of the lunarians," says the author of the World in the Moon, "live wonderful long, even beyond belief ; affirming to me that some survived thirty thousand moons, which is above a thousand years ; and this is generally noted, that the taller people are of stature, the 186 - --^GUTLiiivER's travels: the end of Mareh. We then set sail, and had a good voy- age till we passed the Straits of Madagascar; but having got northward of that island, and to about five degrees south latitude, the winds, which in those seas are observed to blow a constant equal gale between the north and west, from the beginning of December to the beginning of May, on the 19th of April began to blow with much greater vio- lence, and more westerly than usual, continuing so for twenty days together : during which time, we were driven a little to the east of the Molucca Islands, and about three degrees northward of the line-, as our captain found by an obser- vation he took the 2d of May, at which time the wind ceased, and it was a perfect calm ; whereat I was not a little rejoiced. But he being a man well experienced in the navigation of those seas, bid us all prepare against a storm, which accordingly happened on the day following ; for the southern wind, called the southern monsoon, began to set in. Finding it was likely to overblow,* we took in our sprit- sail, and stood by to hand the foresail ; but, making foul weather, we looked the guns were all fast, and handed the mizzen. The ship lay very broad oif, so we thought it bet- ter spooning before the sea, than trying or hulling. We more excellent are their endowments of mind, and the longer time they live ; for their stature is very different, great numbers not much exceeding ours, vyho seldom live above a thousand moons, which is fourscore of our years. These they account base unworthy creatures, but one degree above brute beasts, and employ them in mean and servile offices, calling them bastards, counterfeits, or changelings. Those whom they account true natural lunars, or moon-men, exceed ours generally thirty times, both in quantity of body and length of life, proportionable to the quality of the day in both worlds ; theirs containing almost thirty of our days." * This is a parody upon the account of storms and naval manoeu- vres frequent in old voyages, and is merely an assemblage of sea-terras put together at random. A VOYAGE TO BROBDINQNAfl. 187 reefed the foresail and set him, and hauled aft the foresheet ; the helm was hard-a-weather. The ship wore bravely. We belayed the fore downhaul ; but the sail was split, and we hauled down the yard, and got the sail into the ship, and unbound all the things clear of it. It was a very fierce storm ; the sea broke strange and dangerous. We hauled ofiF upon the laniard of the whipstaff, and helped the man at the helm. We would not get down our topmast, but let all stand, because she scudded before the sea very well, and we knew that the topmast being aloft, the ship was the wholesomer, and made better way through the sea, seeing we had sea-room. When the storm was over, we set foresail and mainsail, and brought the ship to. Then we set the mizzen, maintopsail, and the foretopsail. Our course was east-northeast, the wind was at southwest. We got the starboard tacks aboard, we cast off our weather braces and lifts ; we set in the lee braces, and hauled forward by the weather-bowlings, and hauled them tight, and belayed them, and hauled over the mizzen tack to windward, and kept her ftill and -by as near as she would lie. During this storm, which was followed by a strong wind west-southwest, we were carried, by my computation, about five hundred leagues to the east, so that the oldest sailor on board could not tell in what part of the world we were. Our provisions held out well, our ship was stanch, and our crew all in good health ; but we lay in the utmost distress for water. We thought it best to hold on the same course, rather than turn more northerly, which might have brought us to Jhe northwest part of Great Tartary, and into the Frozen Sea. On the 16th day of June, 1703, a boy on the topmast discovered land. On the 17th, we came in full view of a great island, or continent (for we knew not whether) ; on 188 Gulliver's TftAVELS*. the south side whereof was a small neck of land jutting out into the sea, and a creek too shallow to hold a ship of above one hundred tons. We cast -anchor within a league of this creek, and our captain sent a dozen of his, men well armed in the long boat, with vessels for water, if any could be found. I desired his leave to go with them, that 1 might see the country, and make what dis- coveries 1 could. When we came to land, we saw no river, or spring, nor any sign of inhabitants. Our men therefore wandered on the shore to find out some fresh water near the sea, and I walked alone about a mile on the other side, where I observed the country all barren and rocky. I now began to be weary, and seeing nothing to entertain my curiosity, I returned gently down towards the creek ; and the sea being full in my view, I saw our men already got into the boat, and rowing for life to the ship. I was going to holla after them, although it had been to little purpose, when I observed a huge creature walking after them in the sea, as fast as he could: he waded not much deeper than his kn^s, and took pro- digious strides : but our men had the start of him half a league, and the sea thereabouts being full of sharp-pointed rocks, the monster was not able to overtake the boat. This I was afterwards told, for I durst not stay to see the issue of the adventure, but ran as fast as I could the way I first went, and then climbed up a steep hill, which gave me some prospect of the country. I found it fully cultivated; but that which first surprised me was the length of the grass, which, in those grounds that seemed to be kept for hay, was about twenty feet high. I fell into a highroad, for so I took it to be, though it served to the inhabitants only as a footpath through a field of barley. Here I walked on for some time, but could A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAG. 189 see little on either side, it being now near harvest, and the corn rising at least forty feet. I was an hour walking to the end of this field,, which was fenced in with a hedge of at least one hundred and twenty feet high, and the trees so lofty that I could make no computation of their alti- tude. There was a stile to pass from this field into the next. It had four steps, and a stone to cross over when you come to the uppermost. It was impossible for me to climb this stile, because every step was six feet high, and the upper stone about twenty. I was endeavoring to find some gap in the hedge, when I discovered one of the in- habitants in the next field, advancing towards the stile, of the same size with him whom I saw in the sea pursuing our boat. He appeared as tall as an ordinary spire steeple, and took about ten yards at every stride, as near as I could guess. I was struck with the utmost fear and as- tonishment, and ran to hide myself in the corn, whence I saw him at the top of the stile looking back into the next field on the right hand, and heard him call in a voice many degrees louder than a speaking-trnmpet ; but the noise was so high in the air, that at first I certainly thought it was thunder. Whereupon seven monsters, like himself, came towards him, with reaping-hooks in their hands, each hook about the largeness of six scythes. These people were not so well clad as the first, whose ser- vants or laborers they seemed to be ; for, upon some words he spoke, they went to reap the corn in the field where I lay. I kept from them at as great a distance as I could, but was forced to move with extreme difficulty, for the stalks of corn were sometimes not above a. foot distant, so that I could hardly squeeze my body betwixt them. How- ever, I made a shift to go forward, till I came to a part of the field where the goru had been laid by the rain and 190 GULLIVER S TRAVELS: wind. Here it was impossible for me to advance a stepj for the stalks were so interwoven, that I could not creep through, and the beards of the fallen ears so strong and pointed, that they pierced through my clothes into my flesh. At the same time I heard the reapers not above a hundred yards behind me. Being quite dispirited with toil, and wholly overcome by grief and despair, I lay down between two ridges, and heartily wished I might there end. my days. I bemoaned my desolate widow and fatherless children. I lamented my own folly and wilfulness, iu at- tempting a second voyage, against the advice of all my friends and relations. In this terrible agitation of mind, I could not forbear thinking of Lilliput, whose inhabitants looked upon me as the greatest prodigy that ever appeared in the world ; where I was able to draw an imperial fleet in my hand, and perform those other actions, which will be recorded forever in tbe chronicles of that empire, while posterity shall hardly believe them, although attested by millions. I reflected what a mortification it must prove to me to appear as inconsiderable in this nation, as one single Lilliputian would be among us. But this I conceived was to be the least of my misfortunes ; for, as human creatures are observed to be more savage and cruel in proportion to their bulk, what could I expect but to be a morsel in the mouth of the first among these enormous barbarians that should happen to seize me? Undoubtedly philosophers are in the right when they tell us that nothing is great or little otherwise than by comparison. It might have pleased fortune, to have let the Lilliputians find some nation where tlie people were as diminutive with respect to them, as they were to me. And who knows but that even this prodigious race of mortals might be equally over- A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAG. 191 matched in some distant part of the world, whereof we have yet no discovery ?* Scared and confounded as I was, I could not forbear going on with these reflections, when one of the reapers approaching within ten yards .of the ridge where I lay, made me apprehend that with the next step I should be squashed to death under his foot, or cut in two with his reaping-hook. And therefore, when he was again about to move, I screamed as loud as fear could make me ; where- upon the huge creature trod short, and looking round about under him for so"me time, at last espied me as I lay on the ground. He considered awhile, with the caution of one who endeavors to lay hold on a small dangerous animal in such a manner that it shall not be able either to scratch or bite him, as I myself have sometimes done with a weasel in England. At length he ventured to take me behind, by the middle, between his forefinger and thumb, and brought me within three yards of his eyes, that he might behold " my shape more perfectly. I guessed his meaning, and my good fortune gave me so much presence of mind, that I resolved not to struggle in the least as he held me in the air above sixty feet from the ground, al- though he grievously pinched my sides, for fear I should slip through his fingers. All I ventured was to raise mine eyes toward the sun, and place my hands together in a sup- plicating posture, and to speak some words in an humble melancholy tone, suitable to the condition I then was in : * The satire in the account of the Voyage to Lilliput is for the most part personal, but in the account of Brobdiiignag the satire is general, and directed against institutions rather than individuals. There are, however, a few sarcastic hits in the account given of the court of Brobdingniii^, which bore hard on the statesmen of the day. — Percy, Bishop of Dromore, MS. 192 auLLiVBR's travels: for I apprehended every moment that he would dash me against the ground, as we usually do any little hateful animal which we haye a mind to destroy. But my good star would have it, that he appeared pleased with my voice and gestures, and began to look upon me as a curiosity, much wondering to hear me pronounce articulate words, although he could not understand them. In the meantime I was not able to forbear groaning and shedding tears, and turning my head towards my sides ; letting hira know, as well as I could, how cruelly I was hurt by the pressure of his thumb and finger. He seemed to apprehend my mean- ing ; for, lifting up the lappet of his coat, he put me gently into it, and immediately ran along with me to his master, who was a substantial farmer, and the same person I had first seen in the field. The farmer having (as I suppose by their talk) received such an account of me as his servant could give him, took a piece of a small straw, about the size of a walking-staff, and therewith lifted up the lappets of my coat, which, it seems, he thought to be some kind of covering that nature had given me. He blew my hair- aside to take a better view of my face. He called his hinds about him, and asked them, as I afterwards learned, " Whether they had ever seen in the fields any little creature that ressmbled me ?" he then placed me softly on the ground on all foure, but I immediately got up, and walked slowly backward and forward, to let those people see I had no intent to run away. They all sat down in a circle about me, the better to observe my motions. I pulled off my hat, and made a low bow towards the farmer. I fell on my knees, and lifted up my hands and eyes, and spoke several words as loud as I could ; I took a purse of gold out of my pocket, and humbly presented it to hiui. He received it on the A VOYAdE TO BKOBDINGtHAfl. 193 palm of his hand, and then applied it close to his eye to see what it was, and afterwards turned it several times with the point of a pin (which he took out of his sleeve), hut could make nothing of it. Whereupon I made a sign that he should place his hand on the ground. I then took the purse, and opening it, poured all the gold into his palm. There were six Spanish pieces of four pistoles each, beside twenty or thirty smaller coins. I saw him wet the tip of his little finger upon his tongue, and take up one of my largest pieces, and then another ; but he seemed to be wholly ignorant what they were. He made me a sign to put them again into my purse, and the purse again into my pocket, which, after offering it to him several times, I thought it best to do. The farmer, by this time, was convinced I must be a ra- tional creature. He spoke often to me, but the sound of his voice pierced my ears like that of a watermill, yet his words were articulate enough. I answered as loud as I could in several languages, and he often laid his ear within two yards of me; but all in vain, for we were wholly un- intelligible to each other. He then sent his servants to their work, and taking his handkerchief out of his pocket, he doubled and spread it on his left hand, which he placed flat on the ground with the palm upward, making me a sign to step into it, as I could easily do, for it was not above a foot in thickness. I thought it my part to obey, and, for fear of falling, laid myself at full length upon the hand- kerchief, with the remainder of which he lapped me up to the head* for farther security, and in this manner carried me home to his house. There he called his wife, and showed mS to her; but she screamed and ran back, as women in England do at the sight of a toad or a spider. However, when she had awhile seen my behavior, and how 194 auLLiVBR's travels: well I observed the signs her husband made, she was soon reconciled, and by degrees grew extremely tender of me. It was about twelve at noon and a servant brought in dinner. It was only one substantial dish of meat (fit for the plain condition of a husbandman), in a dish of about four-and-twenty feet diameter. The company were, the farmer and his wife, three children, and an old grand- mother. When they were sat down, the farmer placed me at some distance from him on the table, which was thirty feet high from the floor. I was in a terrible fright, and kept as far as I could from the edge, for fear of falling. The wife minced a bit of meat, then crumbled some bread on a trencher, and placed it before me. I made her a low bow, took out my knife and fork, and fell to eat, which gave them exceeding delight. The mistress sent her maid for a small dram cup, which held about two gallons, and filled it with drink; I took up the vessel with much difii- culty in both hands, and iu a most respectful manner drank to her ladyship's health, expressing'the words as loud as I could in English, which made the company laugh so heart- ily that I was almost deafened with the noise. This liquor tasted like a small cider, and was not unpleasant. Then the master made me a sign to come to his trencher side ; but as I walked on the table, being at great surprise all the time, as the indulgent reader will easily conceive and ex- cuse, I happened to stumble against a crust, and fell flat an my face, but received no hurt. . I got up immediately, and observing the good people to be in much concern, I took my hat (which I held under my arm out of good manners), and waving it over ray head, gave three huzzas, to show I had got no mischief by my fall. But advanc- ing forward towards my master (as I shall henceforth call him), his youngest son, who sat next to him, an arch boy A V0TA9B TO BROBDINGNAG. 195 of about ten years old, took me up by the legs, and held me so high in the air that I trembled every limb ; but his father snatched me from him, and at the same time gave him such a box on the left ear as' would have felled au. European troop of horse to the earth, ordering him to be taken from the table. But being afraid the boy might owe me a spite, and well remembering how mischievous all children among us naturally are to sparrows, rabbits, young kittens, and puppy dogs, I fell on my knees, and pointing to the boy, made my master to understand as well as I could, that I desired his son might be pardoned. The father complied, and the lad took his seat again, where- upon I went to him and kissed his hand, which my master took, and made him stroke me gently with it. In the midst of dinner, my mistress's favorite cat leaped into her lap. 1 heard a noise behind ipe like that of a dozen stocking- weavers at work; and turning my head, I found it proceeded from the purring of that animal, who seemed to be three times larger than an ox, as I com- puted by the view of her head, and one of her paws, while her mistress was feeding and stroking her. The fierceness of this creature's countenance altogether discomposed me; though I stood at the farther end of the table, above fifty feet off; and though my mistress held her fast, for fear she might give a spring, and seize ine in her talons. But it happened there was- no danger, for the cat took not the least notice of me, when my master placed me within three yards of her. And as I have been always told, and found true by experience in my travels, that flying or discovering fear before a fierce animal, is a certain way to make it pursue or attack you, so I resolved, in this dan- gerous juncture, to show no manner of concern. I walked with intrepidity five or six times before the very head of 196 GULLIVER'S TRAVELS: the cat, and came within half a yard of her; whereupon she drew herself back, as if she were more afraid of me. I had less apprehension concerning the dogs, whereof three or four came into the room, as it is usual in farmers' houses; one of which was a mastiff, equal in bulk to four elephants, and a greyhound somewhat taller than the mastiff, but not so large. When dinner was almost done, the nurse came in with a child of a year old in her arms, who immediately spied me, and began a squall that you might have heard from London Bridge to Chelsea, after the usual oratory of in- fants, to get me for a plaything. The mother out of pure indulgence, took me up, and put me towards the child, who presently seized me by the middle, and got my head into his mouth, where I roared so loud that the urchin was frighted, and let me drop, and I should infallibly have broke my neck, if the mother had not held her apron un- der me. The nurse, to quiet her babe made use of a rattle, which was a kind of hollow vessel filled with great stones, and fastened by a cable to the child's waist; but all in vain ; so that she was forced to apply the last remedy by giving it suck. I must confess no object ever disgusted me so much as. the sight of her monstrous breast, which I cannot tell what to compare with, so as to give the curious reader an idea of its bulk, shape, and color. It stood promi- nent six feet, and could not be less than sixteen in circum- ference. The nipple was about h;ilf the bigness of my head, and the hue both of that and the dug, so varied with spots, pimples, and freckles, that nothing could appear more nauseous: for I had a near sight of her, she sitting down, the more conveniently to give suck, and I standing on the table. This made me reflect upon the fair skins of imr English ladies, who appp-ar so beautiful to us, only be- A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAQ. 197 cause they are of our own size, and their defects not to be seen but through a magnifying-glass ; ■where we find by experiment, that the smoothest and whitest skins look rough, coarse, and ill-colored. I remember, when I was at Lilliput, the complexions of those diminutive people appeared to me the fairest in the world ; and talking upon the subject with a person of learn- ing there, who was an intimate friend of mine, he said that my face appeared much fairer and smoother when he looked on me from the ground, than it did upon a nearer view, when I took him up in my hand and brought him close, which he confessed was at first a very shocking sight. He said " he could discover great holes in my skin ; that the stumps of my beard were ten tiaies stronger than the bris- tles of a boar, and my complexion made up of several col- ors, altogether disagreeable ;" although I must beg leave to say for myself, that I am as fair as most of ray sex and country, and very little sunburned by all my travels. On the other side, discoursing of the ladies in that emperor's court, he used to tell me, " one had freckles, another too wide a mouth, a third too large a nose;" nothing of which I was able to distinguish. I confess this reilection was obvious enough ; which, however, I could not forbear, lest the reader might think those vast creatures were actually deformed : for I must do them the justice to say, they are a comely race of people ; and particularly the features of my master's countenance, although he were but a farmer, when I j)eheld him from the height of sixty feet, appeared very well proportioned. When dinner was done, my master went out to his laborers, and, as I could discover by his voice and gesture, gave his wife a strict charge to take care of me. I was very much tired and disposed to sleep, which my mistress 198 GtfLLiVER's' travels: perceiving, she put me on her own bed, covered me with a clean white handlcerchief, but larger and coarser than the mainsail of a man-of-war. I slept about two hours, and dreamt I was at home with my wife and children, which aggravated my sorrows when I awaked,* and found myself alone, in a vast room, between two and three hundred feet wide, and about two hundred high, lying in a bed twenty yards wide. My mistress was gone about her household affairs, and had locked me in. The bed was eight yards from the floor. Some natural necessities required me to get down. I durst not presume to call ; and if I had, it would have been in vain, with such a voice as mine, at so. great a distance as from the room where I lay to the kitchen where the family kept. While I was under these circumstances, two rats crept up the curtains, and ran smelling backwards and forwards on the bed. One of them came up almost to my face, whereupon I rose in a fright, and drew out my hanger to defend my- self. These horrible animals had the boldness to attack me on both sides, and one of them held his forefeet at my collar ; but I had the good fortune to rip up his belly before he could do me any mischief. He fell down at my feet; and the other, seeing the fate of his comrade, made his 'escape, but not without one good wound on the back, which I gave him as he fled, and made the blood run trickling from him.- After this exploit, I Avalked gently to and fro on the bed, to recover my breath and loss of spirits. These creatures were of the size of a large mastiff, but infinitely more nimble and fierce; so that if I had taken off my belt before I went to sleep, I must have infallibly been torn to * This ouglit to have boen ' ' awoke, " the preterit of the verb neuter, not " awaked," the preterit of the verb aictiv e.—Slteridan. A VOYAGE TO EROBDINGNAG. 199 pieces and devoured. I measured the tail of tiie dead rat, and found it to be two yards long, wanting an inch ; but it went against my stomach to draw the carcass off the bed, where it lay still bleeding. I observed it had yet some life, but with a strong slash across the neck, I thoroughly dispatched it. Soon after, my mistress came into the room, who seeing me all bloody, ran and took me up in her hand. I pointed to the dead rat, smiling, and making other signs, to show I was not hurt ; whereat she was extremely rejoiced, calling the maid to take up the dead rat with a pair of tongs, and throw it out of the window. Then she set ipe on a table, where I showed her my hanger all bloody, and wiping it on the lappet of my coat returned it to the scabbard. I was pressed to do more than one thing which another could not do for me, and therefore endeavored to make my mistress understand that I desired to be set down on the floor; which after she had done, my bashfulness would not suffer me to express myself farther, than by pointing to the door, and bowing several times. The good woman, with much difficulty, at last perceived what I would be at, and taking me up again in her hand, walked into the garden, where she set me down. I went on one side about two hundred yards, and beckoning to her not to look or to follow me, I hid myself between two leaves of sorrel, and there dis- charged the necessities of nature. I hope the gentle reader will excuse me for dwelling on these and the like particulars, which, however insignificant tliey may appear to grovelling vulgar minds, yet will cer- tainly help a philosopher to enlarge his thoughts and imagination, and apply them to the benefit of public as private life, which was my sole design in presenting this, and other accounts of my travels, to the world ; wherein 200 Gulliver's travels: I have been chiefly studious of truth, without aifectiiig any ornaments of learning or of style. But the whole scene of this voyage made so strong an impression on my mind, and is so deeply fixed in my memory, that in com- mitting it to paper I did not omit one material circum- stance : however, upon strict review, I blotted out several passages of less moment, which were in my first copy, for fear of being censured as tedious and trifling, whereof travellers are often, perhaps not without justice, accused. A VOYAGE TO BROBDIN&NA&. 201 CHAPTER II. A DESCRIPTION OF THE FARMBR's DAtTGHTBR — THE AUTHOR CAR- RIED TO A MARKET TOWN, AND THEN TO THE MBTKOPOLIS — THE PARTICULARS OF HIS JOURNEY. Y mistress had a daughter of nine years old, a child of towardly parts for her age, very dex- terous at her needle, and skilful in dressing her baby. Her mother and she contrived to fit up the baby's cradle for me against night: the cradle was put into a small drawer of a cabinet, and the drawer placed upon a hanging shelf for fear of the rats. This was my bed all the time I stayed with those people, though made more convenient by degrees, as I began to learn their language and make my wants known. This young girl was so handy, that after I had once or twice pulled off my clothes before her, she was able to dress and undress me, though I never gave her that trouble when she would let me do either myself. She made me seven shirts, and some other linen, of as fine cloth as could be got, which indeed was coarser than sackcloth ; and these she constantly washed for me with her own hands. She was likewise my school- mistress, to teach me the language ; when I pointed to anything^ she told me the name of it in her own tongue, so that in a few days I was able to call for whatever I had a mind to. She was very good-natured, and not above forty feet high, being little for her age. She gave me the name of Grildrig, which the family took up, and after- 202 Gulliver's travels: wards the whole kingdom. The word imports what the Latins call tumunoulus, the Italians liomnncelet'mo, and the English vuiDnikhi. To her I chiefly owe my preservation in that country; we never parted while I was there; I called her my GlumdalcUtch. or little nurse: and should be guilty of great ingratitude, if I omitted this honorable mention of her care and affection towards me, which I heartily wish it lay in my power to requite as she deserves, instead of being the innocent, but unhappy instrument of her disgrace, as I Imve too much reason to fear. It now began to be known and talked of in the neigh- borhood, that my master had found a strange animal in the field, about the bigness of a splacnuek, but exactly shaped in every part like a human creature ; which it also imitated in all its actions ; seemed to speak in a little lan- guage of its own, had already learned several words of theirs, went erect upon two legs, was tame and gentle, would come when it was called, do whatever it was bid, had the finest limbs in the world, and a complexion fiiirer than a nobleman's daughter of three years old. Another farmer, who lived hard by, and was a particular friend of my master, came on a visit on purpose to inquire into the truth of this story. I was immediately produced and placed upon a table, where I walked as I was commanded, drew my hanger, put it up again, made my reverence to my master's guest, asked him in his own language how he did, and told him he was welcome, just as my little nurse had instructed me. This man, who was old and dim- sighted, put on his spectacles to behold me better; at which I could not forbear laughing very heartily, fi)r his eyes appeared like the full moon shining into a chamber at two windows. Our people, who discovered the cause of my mirth, bore me company in laughing, at which the old fel- A VOYAGE TO BROBDIN&N-AG. 203 low was fool enough to be angry, and out of countenance. He had the character of a great miser ; and, to my misfor- tune, he well deserved it, by the cursed advice he gave my master, to show me as a siglit upon a market-day in the next town, which was lialf an hour's riding, about two and twenty miles from our house. I guessed there was some mischief contriving, when I observed my master and his friend whispering long together, sometimes pointing at roe; and my fears made me fancy that I overheard and under- stood some of their words. But the next morning Glum- dalclitcli, my little nurse, told me the whole matter, which she had cunningly picked out from her mother. The poor girl laid me on her bosom, and fell a weeping with shame and grief. She apprehended some mischief would happen to me from rude vulgar folks, who might squeeze me to death, or break one of my limbs by taking me in their hands. She liad also observed how modest I was in my nature, how nicely I regarded my honor, and what an indignity I should conceive it to be exposed for money as a public spectacle to tlie meanest of the people. She said, her papa and mam- ma had promised that Grildrig should be hers; but now she found they meant to serve her as they did last year, when they pretended to give her a lamb, and yet, as soon as it was fat, sold it to a butcher. For my own part, I may truly affirm, that I was less concerned than my nurse. I had a strong hope, which never left me, that I should one day recover my liberty ; and as to the ignominy of being car- ried about for a monster, I considered myself to be a perfect stranger in the country, and that such a misfortune could never be charged upon me as a reproach, if ever I should return to England ; since the king of Great Britain himself, in my condition, must have undergone the same distress. My master, pursuant to the advice of his friend, carried 204 Gulliver's travels: rae in a box the next market-day to tne neighboring town, and took along with him his little daughter, my nurse, upon a pillion behind him. The box was close on every side, with a little door for me to go in and out and a few gindet-holes to let in air. The girl had Ijecn so careful as to put the quilt of her baby's bed into it, for me to lie down on. However, I was terribly shaken and discom- posed in this journey, though it were* but of half an hour; for the horse went about forty feet at every step, and trotted so high, that the agitation was equal to the rising and fall- ing of a ship in a great storm, but much more frequent. Our journey was somewhat farther than from London to St. Albans. My master alighted at an inn which he used to frequent ; and after consulting awhile with the inn- keeper, and making some necessary preparations, he hired the gruUrud, or crier, to give notice through the town, of a strange creature to be seen at the sign of the Green Eagle, not so big as a splaenuoh (an animal in that country very finely shaped, about six feet long), and in every part of the body resembling a human creature, could speak several words, and perform a hundred diverting tricks. I was placed upon a table in the largest room of the inn, which might be near three hundred feet square. My little nurse stood on a low stool close to the table, to take care of me, and direct what I should do. My master, to avoid a crowd, would suffer only thirty people at a time to see me. I walked about on the table as the girl com- manded, she asked me questions, as far as she knew my understanding of the language reached, and I answered * The subjunctive mood is improperly used here; it should have been the indicative, " though it was," instead of " though it were." — Sheridan. A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAG. 205 them as loud as I could. I turned about several times to tlie company, paid my humble respects, said they were loel- oome, and used some other speeches I had been taught. I took up a thimble filled with liquor, which Glumdalclitch had given me for a cup, and drank their health. I drew out my hanger, and flourished with it after the manner of fencers in England. My nurse gave me a part of a straw, which I exercised as a pike, having learned the art in my )'outh. I was that day shown to twelve sets of company, and as often forced to act over again the same fopperies, till I was half dead with weariness and vexation ; for those who had seen me made such wonderful reports, that the people were ready to break down the doors to come in.* My master, for his own interest, would not suffer any one to touch me except my nurse ; and to prevent danger, benches were Set round the table at such a distance as to put me out of everybody's reach. However, an un- lucky schoolboy aimed a hazelnut directly at my head, which very narrowly missed me ; otherwise it came with so much violence, that it would have infallibly knocked out my brains, for it was almost as large as a small pump- ion ; but I had the satisfaction to see the young rogue well beaten, and turned out of the room. My master gave public notice that he would show me again the next market day ; and in the mean time he pre- * The passion for shows and sightseeing was never at a greator height in England than during the reign of George I ; and the wags of the day derived great aniusement from practicing on the credulity of the people. Immense crowi^s assembled to see a man creep into a quart bottle, and when they discovered that they had been deceived, were near destroying the house in their rage. Swift's works contain several amusing parodies of the puffing placards in which these ex- hibitions were announced. 206 GULLIVER'S TRAVELS: pared a more convenient vehicle for me, which he had .reason enough to do; for I was so tired with my first journey, and with entertaining company for eight hours together, that I could hardly stand upon my legs, or speak a word. It was at least three days before I recovered my strength, and that I might have no rest at home, all the neighboring gentlemen from a hundred miles round, hear- ing of my fame, came to see me at my master's own house. There could not be fewer than thirty persons, with their wives and children (for the country is very populous) ; and my master demanded the rate of a full room whenever he showed me at home, although it were only to a single farriily ; so that for some time, I had but little ease every day of the week (except Wednesday, which is their Sab- bath), although I was not carried to the town. My master finding how profitable I was likely to be, resolved to carry me to the most considerable cities of the kingdom. Having, therefore, provided himself with all things necessary for a long journey, and settled his affairs at home, he took leave of his wife, and upon the 17th of August, 1703, about two months after my arrival, we set out for the metropolis, situate near the middle of that em- pire, and about three thousand miles' distance from our house. My master made his daughter GlumdalcUtch ride behind him. She carried me on her lap, in a box tied about her waist. The girl had lined it on all sides with the softest cloth she could get, well quilted underneath, lurnished it with her baby's bed, provided me with linen and other necessaries, and made everything as convenient as she could. We had no other company but a boy of the house, who rode after us with the luggage. My master's design was to show me in all the towns by the way, and to step out of the road, for fifty or a hundred A VOYAGE TO BEOBDINGNAG. 207 miles, to any village or person of quality's house, where he might expect custom. We made easy journeys, of not above seven or eight score hiiles a day ; for Glumdalclitch, on purpose to. spare me, complained she Was tired with the trotting of the horse. She often took me out of my box, at my own desire, to give me air, and show me the coun- try, but always held me fast by a leading-string. We passed over five or six rivers, many degrees broader and deeper than the Nile or the Ganges ; and there was hardly a rivulet so small as the Thames at London Bridge. We were ten weeks in our journey, and I was shown in eighteen large towns, besides many villages, and private families. On the 26th day of October we arrived at the metropo- lis, called in their language Lorbrulgrud or Pride of the Universe. My master took a lodging in the principal street of the city, not far from the royal palace, and put out bills in the usual form, containing an exact description of my person and parts. He hired a large room between three and four hundred feet wide. He provided a table sixty feet in diameter, upon which I was to act my part, and palisadoed it round three feet from the edge, and as many high, to prevent my falling over. I was sho,wn ten times a day, to the wonder and satisfaction of all people. I could now speak the language tolerably well, and per- fectly understood every word that was spoken to me. Be- sides, I had learned their alphabet, and could make a shift to explain a sentence here and there; for Glumdalclitch had been my instructor while we were at home, and at leisure hours during our journey. She carried a little book in her pocket, not much larger than a Sanson's Atlas; it was a common treatise for the use of young girls, giving a short account of their religion : out of this she taught me my letters, and interpreted the words. 208 GULLIVER'S TEAVBLS; CHAPTER III. THE AUTHOR SENT JTOR TO COURT — THE QUEEN BUYS HIM OF HIS MASTER THE FARMER, AND PRESENTS HIM TO THE KING — HE DISPUTES WITH HIS MAJESTY'S GREAT SCHOLARS — AN APART- MENT AT COURT PROVIDED FOR THE AUTHOR — HE IS IN HIGH TATOR WITH THE QUEEN — HE STANDS UP POR THE HONOR OP HIS OWN COUNTRY — HIS QUARRELS WITH THE QUEEN'S DWARF. > ABORS such as I underwent every day, made, in a few weeks, a very considerable change in my health : the more my master got by me, the more insatiable he grew. I had quite lost my stomach, and was almost reduced to a skeleton. The farmer observed it, and concluding I must soon die, resolved to make as good a hand of me as he could. While he was thus reasoning and resolving with himself, a sardral, or gentleman-usher, came from court, commanding my master to carry me immediately thither for the diversion of the queen and her ladies. Some of the latter had already been to see me, and reported strange things of my beauty, be- havior, and good sense. Her majesty, and those who attended her, were beyond measure delighted with my de- meanor. I fell on my knees, and begged the honor of kissing her imperial foot ; but this gracious princess held out her little finger towards me, after I was set on the table, which I embraced in both my arms, and put the tip of it with the utmost respect to my lip. She made me some general questions about my country and my travels, which A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAGl. 209 I answered as distinctly, and in as few words as I could. She asked, " whether I would l)e content to live at court?" I bowed down to the board of the table, and humbly answered, " that I was my master's slave : but if I were at my own disposal, I should be proud to devote my life to her majesty's service." She then asked my master, " whether he was willing to sell me at a good price?" He, who apprehended I could not live a month, was ready enough to part with me, and demanded a thousand pieces of gold, which were ordered him on the spot, each piece being about the bigness of eight hundred moidores ; but allowing for the proportion of all things between that country and Europe, and the higher price of gold among them, was hardly so great a sum as. a, thousand guineas would be in England. I then said to the queen, " since I was now her majesty's most humble creature and vassal, I must beg the favor that Glumdalclitch, who had always tended me with so much care and kindness, and under- stood to do it so well, might be admitted into her service, and continue to be my nurse and instructor." Her majesty agreed to my petition, and easily got the farmer's consent, who was glad enough to have his daughter preferred at court, and the poor girl herself was not able to hide her joy. My late master withdrew, bidding me fare- well, and saying he had left me in a good service ; to which I replied not a word, only making him a slight bow. The queen observed my coldness, and, when the farmer was gone out of the apartment, asked me the reason. I made bold to tell her majesty, "that I owed no other obli- gation to my late master, than his not dashing out the brains of a poor harmless creature, found by chance in his fields, whicit obligation was amply recompensed by the gain he had made in showing me through half the king- 14 210 ouLLiVER's travels: doni, and the price he had now sold me for. That the life I had since led, was laborious enough to kill an animal of ten times my strength. That my health was much im- paired by the continual drudgery of entertaining the rabble every hour of the day ; and that, if my master had not thought my life in danger, her majesty would not have got so cheap a bargain. But as I was out of all fear of being ill-treated, under the protection of so great, and good an empress, the ornament of nature, the darling of the world, the delight of her subjects, the phoenix of the creation ; so I hoped my late master's apprehensions would appear to be groundless ; for I already found my spirits revive, by the influence of her most august presence." This was the sum of my speech, delivered with great improprieties and hesitation. The latter part was altogether framed in the style peculiar to that people, whereof I learned some phrases from Glumdalclitch, while she was carrying me to court. The queen, giving great allowance for my defectiveness in speaking, was, however, surprised at so much wit and good sense in so diminutive an animal. She took me in her own hand, and carried me to the king, who was then retired to his cabinet. His majesty, a prince of much gravity and austere countenance, not well observing my shape at first view, asked the queen, after a cold manner, "how long it was since she grew fond of a splacnuckf for such it seems he took me to be, as I lay upon my breast in her majesty's riglit hand. But this princess, who has an infinite deal of wit and humor, set me gently on my feet upon the scrutoire, and commanded me to give his majesty an account of myself, which I did in a very few words, and Glumdalclitch, who attended at the cabinet door, and could not endure I should be put of her sight, A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAQ. 211 being admitted, confirmed all that had passed from my ai'rival at her father's house. The king, although he be as learned a person as any in his dominions, had been educated in the study of philos- ophy, and particularly mathematics ; yet when he observed my shape exactly, and saw me walk erect, before I began to speak, conceived I might be a piece of clockwork (which is in that country arrived to a very great perfection) contrived by some ingenious artist. But when he heard my voice, and found what I delivered to be regular and rational, he could not conceal his astonishment. He was by no means satisfied with the relation I gave him of the manner I came into his kingdom, but thought it a atory concerted between Glumdalclitch and her father, who had taught me a set of words to make me sell at a better price. Upon this imagination, he put several other questions to me, and still received rational answers, no otherwise de- fective than by a foreign accent, and an imperfect knowl- edge in the language, with some rustic phrases which I had learned at the farmer's house, and did not suit the polite style of a court. His majesty sent for three great scholars, who were then in the weekly waiting, according to the custom of that country. These- gentlemen, after they had awhile ex- amined my shape with much nicety, were of different •opinions concerning me. They all agreed that I could not be produced according to the regular laws of nature, because I was not framed with a capacity of preserving my life, either by swiftness, or climbing of trees, or digging holes in tlie earth. They observed by my teeth, which they viewed with great exactness, that I was a carnivorous animal ; yet most quadrupeds being an overmatch for me, and field mice, with some others, too nimble, they could 212 gullivbk's travels: not imagine how I should be able to support myself, unless I fed upon snails and other insects ; which they offered, by many learned arguments,* to evince that I could not pos- sibly do. One of these virtuosi seemed to think that I might be an embryo, or abortive birth. But this opinion was rejected by the other two, who observed my limbs to be perfect and finished, and that I had lived several years, as it was manifest from my beard, the stumps whereof they plainly discovered through a magnifying-glass. They would not allow me to be a dwarf, because my littleness was beyond all degrees of comparison; for the queen's favorite dwarf, the smallest ever known in that kingdom, was near thirty feet high. After much debate, they con- cluded unanimously, that I v/as on]y relplum sealclath, which is interpreted literally lusus natwce ; a determina- tion exactly agreeable to the modern philosophy of Europe, whose professors, disdaining the old evasion of occult causes, whereby the followers of Aristotle endeavored in vain to disguise their ignorance, have invented this won- derful solution of all difficulties, to the unspeakable ad- vancement of human knowledge. After this decisive conclusion, I entreated to be heard a word or two. I applied myself to the king, and assured his majesty, " that I came from a country which abounded with several millions of both sexes, and of my own stature ; where the animals, trees, and houses, were all in proportion, and where, by consequence, I might be as able to defend * By this reasoning the author probably intended to ridicule the pride of those philosophers who have tlniiight fit to arrnign the wisdom of Providence in the creation and government of the world; whose cavils are specious, like those of the Brobdingnagian sages, only in proportion to the ignorance of those to whom they are pro- posed. — Hawkesworth, A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAG. 2f8 myself, and to find sustenance, as any of his majesty's sub- jects could do here; which I took for a full answer to those gentlemen's arguments." To this they only replied with a smile of contempt, saying, "that the farmer had instructed me very well in my lesson."* The king, who had a much better understanding, dismissed his learned men, sent for the farmer, who by good fortune was not yet gone out of town.f Having, therefore, first examined him pri- vately, and then confronted him with me and the young girl, his majesty began to think that what we told iiim might possibly be true. He desired the queen to order that a particular care should be taken of me ; and was of opinion that Glumdalclitch should still continue in her ofiiee of tending me, because he observed we had a great affe(!tion for each other. A convenient apartment was provided for her at court; she had a sort of governess ap- pointed to take care of her education, a maid to dress her, and two other servants for menial offices ; but the care of me was wholly appropriated to herself. The queen com- manded her own cabinet-maker to contrive a box, that might serve me as a bed-chamber, after the model that Glumdalclitch and I should agree upon. This ma,n was a most ingenious artist, and according to my directions, in three weeks, finished for me a wooden chamber of sixteen * This satire is levelled against all who reject those facts for which they cannot perfectly account, notwithstanding the absurdity of reject- ini; the testimony by wEich they are supported. — Hawkesworth. t Sir Walter Scott thinks that Swift has designedly introduced some traits of William Ill's character in the sketch of the king of Brobdingnag; but if anything more than the ideal of a patriot mon- arch is designed, it is probable that the Dean had an eye to the Prince nf Walps, afterwards George II, from whom the Tories had formed favorable antlciptions. 214 Gulliver's travels: feet square, and twelve high, with sash windows, a door, and two closets, like a London bed-chamber. The board that made the ceiling, was to ho lifted up and down by two hinges, to put in a bed ready furnished by her majesty's upholsterer, which Glumdalclitch took out every day to air, made it svith her own hands, and letting it down at night, locked up the roof over me. A nice workman, who was famous for little curiosities, undertook to make me two chairs, with backs and frames, of a substance not unlike ivory, and two tables, with a cabinet to put my things in. The room was quilted on all sides, as well as the floor and the ceiling, to prevent any accident from the carelessness of those who carried me, and to break the force of a jolt, when I went in a coach. I desired a lock for my door, to prevent rats and mice from coming in. The smith, after several attempts, made the smallest that ever was seen among them, for I have known a larger at the gate of a gentleman's house in England.* I made a shift to keep the key in a pocket of my own, fearing Glumdalclitch might lose it. The queen likewise ordered the thinnest silks that could be gotten, to make me clothes, not much thicker than an English blanket, very cumbersome till I was accustomed to them. They were after the fashion of the kingdom, partly resembling the Persian, and partly the Chinese, and are a very grave and decent habit. The queen became so fond of my company, that she could not dine without me. I had a table placed upon the same at which her majesty ate, just at her elbow, and a chair to sit on. Glumdalclitch stood on a stool on the floor near * Swift's frequent references to proportions, botti liere and in the Voyage to Lilliput, give an air of probability to his story which none of his imitators have been able to attain. A VOYAdfi (to BroBdtnsnag. 215 tny table, to assist and take care of me. I had an entire set of silver dishes and plates, and other necess^riesy which^ in proportion to those of the queen, were not nincli bigger than what I have seen in a London toy-shop, for the fiii'^ niture of a baby-house : these my little nurse l^ept in her pocket in a silver box, and gave me at meals as I wanted them, always cleaning them herself. No person dined with the queen but the two princesses royal, the elder sixteen years old, and the younger at that time thirteen and a month. Her majesty used to put a bit of meat upon one of my dishes, out of which I carved for myself, and her di- version was to see me eat in miniature ; for the queen (who had. indeed but a weak stomach) took up, at one mouthful, as much as a dozen English farmers could eat at a meal, which to me was for some time a very nauseous sight. She would craunch the wing of a lark, bones and all, between her teeth, although it were nine times as large as that of a full-grown turkey ; and put a bit of bread in her mouth, as big as two twelvepenny loaves. She drank out of a golden cup, above a hogshead at a draught. Her knives were twice as long as a scythe, set straight upon the handle. The spoons, forks, and otlier instruments, were all in the same proportion. I remember when Glumdalclitch carried me, out of curiosity, to see some of the tables at court, where ten or a dozen of those' enormous knives and forks were lifted up together, I tliought I had never till then beheld so terrible a sight. It is the custom, that every Wednesday (which, as 1 have observed, is their Sabbath), the king and queen, with the royal issue of both sexes, dine together in the apartment of his majesty, to whom I was now become a great favor- ite; and at these times, my little chair and table were placed at his left hand, before one of the salt-cellars. This 216 prince took a pleasure in conversing with me, inquiring into the niailjiiers, religion, laws, government, and learning of Europe, wherein I gave him the best account I was able. His apprehen.sion was so clear, and his judgment so exact, that he made very wise reflections and observations upon all I said. But I confess, that after I had been a little too copious in talking of my own beloved country, of our trade and wars by sea and land, of our schisms in religion, and parties in the state, the prejudices of his education prevailed so far, that he oould not forbear taking me up in his right hand, and, stroking me gently with the other, after a hearty fit of laughing, asked me, whether I was a Whig or Tory ? Then turning to his first minister, who waited behind him with a white staff", near as tall as the mainmast of the Royal Sovereign, he observed, "how contemptible a thing was human grandeur, which could be mimicked by such diminutive insects as I; and yet," says he, "I dare engage these creatures have their titles and distinctions of honor ; they contrive little nests and burrows, that they call houses and cities; they make a figure and dress in equipage; they love, they fight, they dispute, they cheat, they betray." And thus he continued on, while my color came and went several times, with indignation, to hear our noble country, the mistress of arts and arms, the scourge of France, the arbitress of Europe, the seat of virtue, piety, honor, and truth, the pride and envy of the world, so contemptuously treated.* But as I was not in a condition to resent injuries, so upon mature thoughts I began to doubt whether I was in- * These boasts, which have been -the commonplaces of party during tlie last two centuries, are rendered supremely ridiculous by their contrast with the speech of the king of Brobdingnag. A VOtASi) TO BROBfilNGNAG. 217 Jured or no.* For, after having been accustomed several montlis to the sight and converse of this people, and ob- served every object upon which I cast mine eyes to be of proportionable magnitude, the horror I had at first con- ceived from their bulk and aspect was so far worn oif, that if I had then beheld a company of English lords and ladies in their finery and birthday clothes, acting their several parts in the most courtly manner of strutting, and bowing, and prating ; to say the truth, I should have been strongly tempted to laugh as much at them as the king and his grandees did at me. Neither, indeed, could I forbear smil- ing at myself, when the queen used to place me upon her hand towards a looking-glass, by which both our persons appeared before me in full view together ; and there could be nothing more ridiculous than the comparison ; so that I really began to imagine myself dwindled many degrees be- low my usual size. Nothing angered and mortified me so much as the queen's dwarf; wh(3, being of the lowest stature that was ever in that country (for I verily think he was not full thirty feet high), became so insolent at seeing a creature so much be- neath him, that he would always afiect to swagger and look big as he passed by me in the queen's antechamber, while I was standing on some table talking with the lords or ladies of the court, and he seldom failed of a smart word or two upon my littleness ; against which I could only revenge * " Wiisther I was injared or no." This vulgar and ungram- matical mode of expression has become almost universal | but instead of " no" the particle "not" should be used. The absurdity of the former will appear by only repeating the word to which it refers, and annexing to it, as thus — "whether I were injured, or no injured," whereas, " whether ^ were injured or not injured," is good gram- mar. — Sheridan. 218 GtJLliivER's travels: myself by calling him brother, challenging him to wrestle, and such repartees as are usually in the mouths of court pages. One clay at dinner, this malicious little cub was so nettled with something I had said to him, that, raising himself upon the frame of her majesty's chair, he took me up by the middle, as I was sitting down, not thinking any harm, and let me drop into a large silver bowl of cream, and then ran away as fast as he could. I fell over head and ears, and if I had not been a good swimmer it might have gone very hard with me; for Glumdalclitch in that instant happened to be at the other end of the room, and the queen was in such a fright thg* she wanted presence of mincl to assist me. But my little nurse ran to my relief, and took me out, after I had swallowed abovM a quart of cream. I was put to bed ; however I received no other damage than the loss of a suit of clothes, which was ut- terly spoiled. The dwarf was soundly whipped, and as a farther punishment, forced to drink up the bowl of cream into which he had thrown me: neither was he ever restored i to favor ; for soon after the queen bestowed him on a lady of high quality, so that I saw him no more, to my very great satisfaction : for I could not tell to what extremity such a malicious urchin might have carried his resentment. He had before served me a scurvy trick, which set the queen a-laughing, although at the same time she was heartily vexed, and would have immediately cashiered Lim, if I had not been so generous as to intercede. Her majesty had taken a marrow-bone upon her plate, and, after knock- ing out the marrow, placed the bone again on the dish erect, as it stood before ; the dwarf, watehing his oppor- tunity, while Glumdalclitch was gone to the sideboard, mounted the stool that she stood on to take care of me at meals, took me up in both hands, and squeezing my legs A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAQ. 219 together, wedged them into the marrow-bone above my waist, where I stuck for some time, and made a veiy ridic- ulous figure. I believe it was near a minute before any one knew what was become of me ; for I thought it below me to cry out. But, as princes seldom get their meat hot, my legs were not scalded, only my stockings and breeches in a sad condition. The dwarf, at my entreaty, had no other punishment than a sound whipping. I was frequently rallied by the queen upon account of my fearfulness ; and she used to ask me wliether the peo- ple of my country were as great cowards as myself! The occasion was this : the kingdom is much pestered with flies in the summer; and these odious insects, each of them as big as a Dunstable lark, hardly gave me any rest while I sat at dinner, with their continual humming and buzzing about mine ears. They would sometimes alight upon my victuals, and leave their loathsome excrement or spawn behind, which to me was very visible, though not to the natives of that country, whose larger optics were not so acute as mine in viewing smaller objects. Sometimes they would fix upon my nose or forehead, where they stung me to the quick, smelling very offensively ; and I could easily trace that viscous matter, which, our naturalists tell us, enables those creatures to walk with their feet upwards upon a ceiling. I had much ado to defend myself against these detestable animals, and could not forbear starting when they came on my face. It was the common practice of the dwarf, to catch a number of these insects in his hand, as schoolboys do among us, and let them out sud- denly under my nose, on purpose to frighten me, and divert the queen. My remedy was to cut them in pieces with my knife, a.s they flew in the air, wherein mv dex- terity was much admired. 220 oullivbr's tratels: I remember, one morning, when Glumdalclitch had set me in a box upon a window, as she usually did in fair days to give me air (for I durst not venture to let the box be hung on a nail out of the window, as we do with cages in England), after I had lifted up one of my sashes, and sat down at my table to eat a piece of sweet cake for my break- fast, above twenty wasps, allured by the smell, came flying into the room, humming louder than the drones of as many bagpipes. Some of them seized my cake, and carried it piecemeal away ; others flew about my head and face, con- founding me with the noise, and putting me in the utmost terror of their stings. However, I had the courage to rise and draw my hanger, and attack them in the air. I dis- patched four of them, but the rest got away, and I pres- ently shut my window. These insects were as large as partridges : I took out their stings, found them an inch and a half long, and as sharp as needles. I carefully pre- served them all ; and having since shown them, with some other curiosities, in several parts of Europe ; upon my re- turn to England I gave three of them to Gresham College, and kept the fourth for myself. A VOYAGE TO JBBOBDINaNAG. 221 I ^1 CHAPTER IV. THE COUNTRY DBSCUIBBD — A PROPOSAL FOR CORRBCTINQ MODBRN MAPS — THE KING'S PALACE, AND SOME ACCOUNT OF THE ME- TROPOLIS—THE author's way of TRAVELLING — THE CHIEF TEMPLE DESCRIBED. OURNEYS with Glumdalclitch having given me some knowledge of the country, I now in- tend to give the reader a short description of it, as far as I travelled, which was not above two thousand miles round Lorbrulgrud, the metropolis. For the queen, whom I always attended', never went far- ther when she accompanied the king in his progresses, and there stayed till his majesty returned from viewing his frontiers. The whole extent of this prince's dominions reaches about six thousand miles in length, and from three to five in breadth ; whence I cannot but conclude that our geographers of Europe are in a great error, by supposing nothing but sea between Japan and California; for it was ever my opinion, that there must be a balance of earth to counterpoise the great continent of Tartary; and therefore they ought to correct their maps and charts, by joining this vast tract of land to the nortJiwest parts of America, wherein I shall be ready to lend them my assistance. The kingdom is a peninsula, terminated to the north- east by a ridge of mountains thirty miles high, which are altogether impassable, by reason of the volcanoes upon the tops ; neither do the most learned know what sort of mor- 222 gdlliver's travels: tals inhabit beyond those mountains, or whether they be inhabited at all. On the three other sides, it is bounded by the ocean. There is not one seaport in the whole king- dom ; and those parts of the coasts into which the rivers issue, are so full of pointed rocks, and the sea generally so rough, that there is no venturing with the smallest of their boats ; so that these people are wholly excluded from any commerce with the rest of the world.* But the large rivers are full of vessels, and abound with excellent fish ; for they seldom get any from the sea, because the sea-fish are of the same size with those in Europe, and consequently, not worth catching ; whereby it is manifest, that nature, in the production of plants and animals of so extraordinary a bulk, is wholly confined to this continent, of which I leave the reasons to be determined by philosophers. However, now and then they take a whale that happens to be dashed against the rocks, which the common people feed on hear- tily. These whales I have known so large, that a man could hardly carry one upon his shoulders ; and some- times, for curiosity, they are brought in hampers to Lor- * This description of a sea that could not be safely navigated, ap- pears to have been taken from that veracious traveller, Sir J. Mande- ville. " From the land of Bactry, men go many days' journey to the land of Prester John, that is a great emperor of Inde; and men call his land the yle of Pantoxore. . . . There are many places in the sea where are many rockes of a stone that is called adamand, the which of his own kind draweth all manner of yron, and therefore there may be no ships that hath yron nayles pass but it draweth them to him, and therefore they dare not go into that country with ships for fear of adamand. I went once into that sea, and saw along it as it had been a great ylo of troes^ stockes and branches growinge, and the shipmen told mo that those wore of greate shippes " that abode there through the vortue of the adamandes, and of things that were in the shijipos, whereof those trees sprung and waxed." A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAfl. 223 bmlgrud ; I saw one of them in a dish at the king's table, which passed for a rarity, but I did not observe he was fond of it ; for I think, indeed, the bigness disgusted him, although I have seen one somewhat larger in Greenland. The country is well inhabited, for it contains fifty-one cities, near a hundred walled towns, and a great number of villages. To satisfy my curious reader, it may be sufficient to describe Lorbrulgrud. This city stands upon almost two equal parts, on each side of the river that passes through. It contains above eighty thousand houses, and about six hundred thousand inhabitants. It is in length three glomglungs (which makes about fifty-four English miles), and two and a half in breadth ; as I measured it myself in the royal map made by the king's order, which was laid on the ground on purpose for me, and extended a hundred feet ; I paced the diameter and circumference sev- eral times barefoot, and computing by the scale, measured it pretty exactly. The king's palace is no regular edifice, but a heap of building about seven miles round : the chief rooms are generally two hundred and forty feet high, and broad and long in proportion. A coach was allowed to Glumdalclitch and me, wherein her governess frequently took her out to see the town, or go among the shops ; and I was always of the party, carried in my box ; although the girl, at my own desire, would often take me out, and hold me in her hand, that I might more conveniently view the houses and the people, as we passed along the streets. I reckoned our coach to be about ^a square of Westminster Hall, but not altogether so high ; however, I cannot be very exact. One day the governess ordered our coachman to stop at several shops, where the beggars, watching their opportunity, prowded to the gides of the poachy and gave me the most 224: Gulliver's travels: horrible spectacle that ever a European eye beheld. There was a woman with a cancer in her breast, swelled to a mon- strous size, full of holes, in two or three of which I could have easily crept, and covered my whole body. There was a fellow with a wen in his neck, larger than five wool- packs ; and another with a couple of wooden legs, each about twenty feet high. But the most hateful sight of all was the lice crawling on their clothes. I could see dis- tinctly the limbs of these vermin with my naked eye, much better than those of a European louse through a micro- scope, and their snouts with which they rooted like swine. They were the first I had ever beheld, and I should have been curious "enough to dissect one of them, if I had had proper instruments, which I unluckily left behind me in the ship, although, indeed, the sight was so nauseous, that it perfectly turned my stomach. Beside the large box in which I was usually carried, the queen ordered a smaller one to be made for me, of about twelve feet square, and ten high, for the convenience of travelling ; because the other was somewhat too large for Glumdalclitch's lap, and cumbersome in the coach : it was made by the same artist, whom I directed in the whole con- trivance. This travelling closet was an exact square, with a window iu the middle of three of the squares, and each window was latticed with iron wire on the outside, to pre- vent accidents in long journeys. On the fourth side, which had no window, two strong staples were fixed, through which the person that carried me, when I had a mind to be on horseback, put a leather belt, and- buckled it about his waist. This was always the office of some grave trusty servant^ in whom I could confide, -whether I attended the king and queen in their progresses, or were disposed to see the gardens, or pay a visit to some great lady or minister A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAG. 225 of state in the court, when Glumdalclitch happened to be out of order ; for I soon began to be known and esteemed among the greatest officers, I suppose more upon account of their majesties' favor, than any merit of my own. In journeys, when I was weary of the coach, a servant on horseback would buckle on my box, and place it upon a cushion before him ; and there I had a full prospect of the country on three sides, from my three windows. I had, in this closet a field-bed, and a hammock hung from the ceil- ing, two chairs and a table, neatly screwed to the floor, to prevent being tossed about by the "Agitation of the horse or the coach. And having been long used to sea voyages, those motions, although sometimes very violent, did not much discompose me. Whenever I had a mind to see the town, it was always in my travelling closet : which Glumdalclitch held in her lap in a kind of open sedan, after the fashion of the coun- try, borne by four men, and attended by two others in the queen's livery. The people, who had often heard of me, were very curious to crowd about the sedan, and the girl was complaisant enough to make the bearers stop, and to take me in her hand that I might be more conveniently seen. I was very desirous to see the chief temple, and partic- ularly the tower belonging to it, which is reckoned the highest in the kingdom. Accordingly, one day my nurse carried me thither, but I may truly say I came back dis- appointed ; for the height is not above three thousand feet, reckoning from the ground to the highest pinnacle top ; which, allowing for the difference between the size of those people and us in Europe, is no great matter for ad- miration, nor at all equal in proportion (if I rightly re- member) to Salisbury steeple. But, not to detract from a 15 226 GULLIVER'S travels: nation, to which, during ray life, I shall acknowledge myself extremely obliged, it must be allowed, that what- ever this famous tower wants in height, is amply made up in beauty and strength; for the walls are near a hundred feet thick, built of hewn stone, whereof each is about forty feet square, and adorned on all sides with statues of gods and emperors, cut in marble, larger than the life, placed in their several niches. I measured a little finger which had fallen down from one of these statues, and lay unper- ceived among some rubbish, and found it exactly four feet and an inch in length.** Glumdalclitch wrapped it up in her handkerchief, and carried it home in her pocket, to keep among other trinkets, of which the girl was very fond, as children at her age usually are. The king's kitchen is, indeed, a noble building, vaulted at top, and about six hundred feet high. The great oven is not so wide, by ten paces, as the cupola at St. Paul's ; for I measured the latter on purpose, after my return. But if I should describe the kitchen grate, the prodigious pots and kettles, the joints of meat turning on the spits, with many other particulars, perhaps I should be hardly be- lieved ; at least a severe critic would be apt to think I en- * Had Swift seen the colossal statuary of ancient Egypt, he would have found that it rivalled the imaginary sculpture of Brobdingnag. Belzoni has given the (tfcact dimensions of the four stupendous figures which are seated side by side in front of the excavated temple of Ipsambul; each of them, though seated, measures sixty-four feet from the ground to the top of the cap : the arm, from the shoulder to the elbow, measures fifteen feet and a half, the ear three feet and a half, and the chest, across the shoulders, twenty-five feet four inches. Yet the great Sphinx is half as large again as these. Among tlie Egyptian antiquities there is a colossal fist, probably belonging to a sphinx : were the hand opened, the fingers would be nearly of the size of that which Glumdalclitch is said to have picked up. A VOYAGE TO BEOBDINGNAG. 227 larged a little, as travellers are often suspected to do. To avoid which censure, I fear I have run too much into the other extreme, and that if this treatise siiould happen to be translated into the language of Brobdingnag (which is the general name of that kingdom), and transmitted thither, the king and his people would have reason to complain that I had done them an injury by a false and diminutive representation.* His majesty seldom keeps above six hundred horses in his stables ; they are generally from fifty-four to sixty feet high. But, when he goes abroad on solemn days, he is at- tended, for state, by a militia guard of five hundred horse, which, indeed, I thought was the most splendid sight that could be ever beheld, till I saw part of his army in bat- talia, whereof I shall find another occasion to speak. * Lord Orrery has directed attention to the air of probability which Swift's minute attention to proportions, and his reference to familiar objects as a standard, give to his account of Lilliput. The same tact is not less observable in the account of Brobdingnag, and particularly in the comparison of the royal kitchen with the cupola of St. Paul's ; perhaps also Swift intended to hint that St. Paul's, however splendid as an edifice, does not, like the Gothic cathedrals, immediately suggest that it was erected for religious purpose*. 228 auiiLiVBR's travels; CHAPTER V. SEVERAL ADVENTURES THAT HAPPENED TO THE AUTHOR — THE EXECUTION or A CRIMINAL — THE AUTHOR SHOWS HIS SKILL IN NAVIGATION. *i nUSTLY may I say, that I should have lived happy enough in the country, if my littleness had not exposed me to several ridiculous and troublesome accidents ; some of which I shall venture to relate. Glumdalclitch ofteii carried me into the gardens of the court in my smaller box, and would some- times take me out of it, and hold me in her hand, or set me down to walk. I reniember, before the dwarf left the queen, he followed us one day into those gardens, and my nurse having set me down, lie and I being close together, near some dwarf appletrees, I must. need show my wit, by a silly allusion between him and the trees, which happens to hold in their language as it does in ours. Whereupon, the malicious rogue, watching his opportunity, when I was walking under one of them, shook it directly over my head, by which a dozen apples, each of tiiem near as large as a Bristol barrel, came tumbling about my cars; one of them hit me on the back as I chanced to stoop, and knocked me down flat on my face; but I reieivwl no other hurt, and the dwarf was pardoned at my desire, because I had given the provocation. Another day, Glumdalclitch left me on a smooth grass- A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAG. 229 plot to divert myself, while she walked at some distance with her governess. -In the meantime, there suddenly fell such a violent shower of hail, that I was immediately, by the force of it, struck to the ground ; and when I was down, the hailstones gave me such cruel bangs all over the body, as if I had been pelted with tennis-balls : however, I made a shift to creep on all fours, and shelter myself, by lying flat on my face, on the lee-side of a border of lemon- thyme ; but so bruised from head to foot, that I could not go abroad in ten days. Neither is that at all to be won- dered at, because nature, in that country, observing the same proportion through all her operations, a hailstone is near eighteen hundred times as large as one in Europe ; which I can assert upon experience, having been so curious* to weigh and measure them. But a more dangerous accident happened to me in the same garden,' when my little nurse, believing she had put me in a secure place (which I often entreated her to do, .that I might enjoy my own thoughts), and having left my box at home, to avoid the trouble of carrying it, went to another part of the garden with her governess and some ladies of her acquaintance. While she was absent, and out of hear- ing, a small white spaniel that belonged to one of the chief gardeners, having got by accident into the garden, hap- pened to range near the place where I lay : the dog, fol- lowing the scent, came directly up, and taking me in his mouth, ran straight to his master wagging his tail, and set me gently on the ground. By good fortune he had been so well taught, that I was carried between his teeth with- out the least hurt, or even tearing my clothes. But the * The particle " as," is here improperly omitted ; it should be, so curious " as " to weigh, etc. — Sheridan. 230 ^hjilivbr's travels: poor gardener, who knew me well, and had a great kind- ness for me, was in a terrible fright ; he gently took me up in both his hands, and asked me how I did ; but I was so amazed and out of breath, that I could, not speak a word. In a few minutes I came to myself, and he carried me safe to my little nurse, who, by this time, had returned to the place where she left me, and was in cruel agonies when I did not appear, nor answer when she called. She severely reprimanded the gardener on account of his dog. But the thing was hushed up, and never known at court, for the girl was afraid of the queen's anger; and truly, as to my- self, I thought it would not bo for my reputation that such a story should go about. This accident absolutely determined Glumdalclitch never to trust me abroad for the future out of her sight. I had been long afraid of this resolution, and therefore concealed from her some little unlucky adventures, that happened in those times when I was left by myself. Once a kite, hovering over the garden, made a st-oop at me, and if I had not resolutely drawn my hanger, and run under a thick espalier, he would have certainly carried me away in his talons. Another time, walking to the top of a fresh mole- hill, I fell to my neck in the hole, through which that animal had cast up the earth, and coined some lie, not worth remembering, to excuse myself for spoiling my clothe.«. I likewise broke ray right shin against the shell of a snail, which I happened to stumble over, as I was walking alone and thinking of poor England. I cannot tell whether I were more pleased or mortified to observe, in those solitary walks, that the smaller birds did not appear to be at all afraid of mc, but would hop about within a yard's distance, looking for worms and other food, with as much indifference and security as if no crea- A VOYAflE TO BROEDINGNAG. 231 ture at all were near them. I remember, a thrush had the confidence to snatch out of my hand, with his bill, a piece of cake that Glumdalclitch had just given me for my breakfast. When I attempted to catch any of these birds, they would boldly turn against me, endeavoring to peck my fingers, which I durst not venture within their reach; and then they would hop back unconcerned, to hunt for worms or snails, as they did before. But one day, I took a thick cudgel, and threw it with, all my strength so luckily, at a linnet, that I knocked him down, and seizing him by the neck with both my hands, ran with him in triumph to my nurse. However, the bird, who had only been stunned, recovering himself, gave me so many boxes with his wings, on both sides of my head and body, though I held him at arm's length, and was out of the reach of his claws, that I was twenty times thinking to let him go. But I was soon relieved by one of our servants, who wrung off the bird's neck, and I had him next day for dinner, by the queen's , command. This linnet, as near as I can remember, seemed to be somewhat larger than an English swan. The maids of honor often invited Glumdalclitch to their apartments, and desired she would bring me along with her, on purpose to have the pleasure of seeing and touch- ing me.* They would often strip me naked from top to * Swift attributed his disappointment in his hopes of obtaining a bishopric from Queen Anne to the united influence of female intrigues and the remonstrances of Archbishop Sharpe. The Duchess of Somerset is said to have besought the Queen on her knees not to grant him promotion, in revenge for a bitter lampoon, in which the char- actor of the duchess was very roughly handled. Coarse as is the de- pcription here given" of the maids of honor in the court of Brobding- nag, there is reason to believe that it has been much softened down from the original sketch. 232 Gulliver's travels: toe, and lay me at full length in their bosoms, wherewith I was much disgusted; because, to say the truth, a very offensive smell came from their skins ; which I do nof mention or intend to the disadvantages of those excellent ladies, for whom I have all manner of respect; but I con- ceive that my sense was more acute in proportion to my littleness, and that those illustrious persons were no more disagreeable to their lovers, or to each other, than people of the same quality are with us in England. And after all, I found their natural smell was much more support- able than when they used perfumes, under which I imme- diately swooned away. I cannot forget, that an intimate friend of mine in Lilliput took the freedom in a warm day, when I had used a good deal of exercise, to complain of a strong smell about me, although I am as little faulty that way as most of my sex ; but I suppose his faculty of smell- ing was as nice with regard to me, as mine was to that of this people. Upon this point, I cannot forbear doing jus- tice to the queen my mistress, and Glumdalclitch my nurse,* whose persons were as sweet as those of any lady in England That which gave me most uneasiness among these maids of honor (when my nurse carried me to visit them) was, to see them use me without any manner of ceremony, like a creature who had no sort of concupiscence : for they would strip themselves to the skin, and put their smocks on in my presence, while I was placed on their toilet, directly before their naked bodies, which I am sure to me was very far from being a tempting sight, or from giving me any other emotions than those of horror and disgust; their skins appeared so coarse and uneven, so variously colored, when I saw them near, with a mole here and there as broad as a trencher, and hairs hanging from it thicker than pack- A VOYAGE TO EKOBDINflNAG, 233 threads, to say nothing farther concerning the rest of tlieir persons. Neither did they at all scruple, while I was by, to discharge what they had drank, to the quantity of at least two hogsheads, in a vessel that held above three tuns. The handsomest among these maids of honor, a pleasant frolicsome girl of sixteen, would sometimes set me astride upon one of her nipples, with many other tricks, wherein the reader will excuse me for not being over particular. But I was so much displeased, that I entreated Glumdal- clitoh to contrive some excuse for not seeing that young lady any more. One day, a young gentleman, who was nephew to my jirse's governess, came and pressed them both to see an execution. It was of a man, who had murdered one of that gentleman's intimate acquaintance. Glumdalclitch was prevailed on to be of the company, very much against her inclination, for she was naturally tender-hearted; and as for myself, although I abhorred such kind of spectacles, yet my curiosity tempted me to see something that I thought must be extraordinary. The malefactor was fixed on a chair upon a scaffold erected for that purpose, and his head cut off at one blow, with a sword of about forty feet long. The veins and arteries spouted up such a prodigious quan- tity of blood, and so high in the air, that the great jet d'eau at Versailles was not equal* for the time it lasted ; and the head, wJien it fell on the scaffold floor, gave such a bounce as made me start, although I were at least half an English mile distant. The 'queen, who often used to hear me talk of my sea- voyages, and took all occasions to divert me when I was melancholy, asked me whether T understood how to handle * It should be — " was not equal to it," etc. — Sheridan. 234 Gulliver's travels; a sail or an oar, and whether a little exorcise of rowing might not be convenient for my health ? I answered that I nnderstood both very well : for althongh my proper em- ployment had been to be snrgeon or doctor to the ship, yet . often, upon a pinch, I was forced to work like a common' mariner. Bat I conld not see how this could be done in their country, where the smallest wherry was equal to a first-rate man-of-war among us ; and such a boat as I could manage would never live in any of their rivers. Her majesty said, " If I would contrive a boat, her own joiner should make it, and she would provide a place for me to sail in." The fellow was an ingenious workman, and by my instructions, in ten days, finished a pleasure-boat, with all its tackling, able conveniently to hold eight Europeans. When it was finished, the queen was so delighted, that she ran with it in her lap to the king, who ordered it to be put into a cistern full of water, with me in it, by way of trial ; where I could not manage my two sculls, or little oars, for want of room. But the queen had before contrived another project. She ordered the joiner to make a wooden trough of three hundred feet long, fifty broad, and eight deep; which being well j)itched to prevent leaking, was placed on the floor along the wall, in an outer room of the palace. It had a cock near the bottom to let out the water, when it began to grow stale ; and two servants could easily fill it in half an hour. Here I often used to row for my own diversion, as well as that of the queen and her ladies, who thought themselves well entertained with my skill and agility. Sometimes I would put up my sail and then my business was only to steer, while the ladies gave me a gale with their fims; and when they were weary, some of their pages would blow my sail forward witii their breath, while I showed my art by steering starboard or larboard as I A VOYAGE TO fiROBDlNdNAGt. 235 pleased. When I had done, Glumdalclitch always carried hack my boat into her closet, and hung it on a nail to dry. In this exercise I once met an accident, which had like to have cost me my life ; for, one of the pages having put ray boat into the trough, the governess who attended Glum- dalclitch very officiously lifted me up, to place me in the boat; but I happened to slip through her fingers, and should infallibly have fallen down forty feet, upon the floor, if, Ijy the luckiest chance in the world, I had not been stopped by a corking-pin that stuck in the good gentlewo- man's stomacher ; the head of the pin passed between my shirt and the waistband of my breeches, and thus I was held by the middle in the air, till Glumdalclitch ran to my relief. Another time, one of the servants, whose office it was to fill my trough every third day with fresh water, was so care- less* to let a huge frog (not perceiving it) slip out of his pail. The frog lay concealed till I was put into my boat, but then, seeing a resting-place, climbed up, and made it to lean so much on one side, that I was forced to balance it with all my weight on the otlier to prevent overturning. When the frog was got in, it hopped at once half the length of the boat, and then over my head, backward and forward, daubing my face and clothes with its odious slime. The largeness of its features made it appear the most deformed animal that can be conceived. However, I desired Glum- dalclitch to let me deal with it alone. I banged it a good while with one of my sculls, and at last forced it to leap out of the boat. But the greatest danger I underwent in that kingdom, was from a monkey, who belonged to one Of the clerks of * It should be — "was so careless as to let." — Shei-idan, 236 Gulliver's travels*. the kitchen. Glumdalclitch liad locked me up in her closet, while she went somewhere upon business, or a visit. The ^vcather being very warm, the closet window was' left open, as well as the windows and door of my bigger box, in which I usually lived, because of its largeness and con- vcniency. As I sat quietly meditating at my table, I heard something bounce in at the closet-window, and skip about from one side to the other; whereat, although I was much alarmed, yet I ventured to look out, but not stirring from my seat; and then I saw this frolicsome animal frisk- ing and leaping up and down, till at last he came to my box, which he seemed to view with great pleasure and cu- riosity, peeping in at the door and every window. I re- treated to the farther corner of my room, or . box ; but the monkey looking in at every side, put me into such a fright, that I wanted presence of mind U) conceal m3'self under the bed, as I might easily have done. After some time spent in peeping, grinning, and chattering, he at last espied me ; and reaching one of his paws in at the door, as a eat does when she plays with a mouse, although I often shifted place to avoid him, he at length seized the lappet of my coat (which being made of that country silk, was very thick and strong), and dragged me out. He took me up in his right forefoot, and held me as a nurse does a child she is going to suckle, just as I have seen the same sort of crea- ture do with a kitten in Europe; and when I offered to struggle, he squeezed me so hard, that I thought it more prudent to submit. I have good reason to believe that he took me for a young one of his own species, by his often stroking my face very gently with his other paw. In these diversions he was interrupted by a noise at the closet door, as if somebody were openinn- it ; whereupon he suddenly leaped up to the window, at which he had come in, and A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAG. 237 thence upon the leads and gutters, walking upon three legs, and holding me in the fourth, till he clambered up to a roof that was next to ours. I heard Glumdalclitch give a shriek the moment he was carrying me out. The poor girl was almost distracted ; that quarter of the palace was all in an uproar; the servants ran for ladders; the monkey was seen by hundreds in the court, sitting ujjon the ridge of a building, holding me like a baby in one of his fore- paws, and feeding me with the other, by cramming into my mouth some victuals he had squeezed out of the bag on one side of his chaps, and patting me when 1 would not eat ; whereat many of the rabble below could not forbear laughing; neither do I think they justly ought to be blamed, for, without question, the sight was ridiculous enough to everybody but myself. Some of the people threw up stones, hoping to drive the monkey down ; but this was strictly forbidden, or else, very probably, my brains had been dashed out. The ladders were now applied, and mounted by several men : which the monkey observing, and finding himself almost encompassed, not being able to make speed enough with his three legs, let me drop on a ridge tile, and made his escape. Here I SHt for some time, five hundred yards from the ground, expecting every moment to be blown down by the wind, or to fall by my own giddiness, and come tumbling over and over from the ridge to the eaves : but an honest lad, one of my nurse's footmen, climbed up, and putting me into his breeches pocket, brought me down safe. I was almost choked with the filthy stuff the monkey had crammed down my throat; but my dear little nurse picked it out of my mouth with a small needle, and then I fell a-vomiting, which gave me great relief. Yet I was 238 Gulliver's travels- so A\'eak and bruised in the sides with the squeezes given Die by this odious animal, that I was forced to keep my bed a fortnight. The king, queen, and all the court, sent every day to- inquire after my health : and her majesty made me several visits during my sickness. The monkey was killed, and an order made that no such animal should be kept about the palace. When I attended the king after my recovery, to return him thanks for his favors, he was pleased to rally me a good deal upon this adventure. He asked me, " what my thoughts and speculations were while I lay in the mon- licy's paw? how I liked the victuals he gave me? his manner of feeding? and whether the fresh air on the roof had sharpened my stomach?" He desired to know "what I would have done upon such an occasion in my own country ?" I told his majesty, " that in Europe we had no monkeys except such as were brought for curiosities from other places, and so small that I could deal with a dozen of them together, if they presumed to attack me. And as for that monstrous animal, with whom I was so lately engaged (it was indeed as large as an elephant), if my fears had suffered me to think so far as to make use of my hanger (looking fiercely, and clapping my hand upon the hilt, as I spoke) when he poked his paw into my chamber, perhaps I should have given him such a wound, as would have made him glad to withdraw it, with more haste than he put it in." This I delivered in a firm tone, like a person who was jealous lest his courage should be called in question. However, my speech produced nothing else beside a loud laughter, whicii all the respect due to his majesty from those about him could not make them contain. This made me reflect, how vain an attempt it is for a man to endeavor to do himself honor among those A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAG. 239 who are out of all degree of equality or comparison with him. And yet I have seen the moral of my own behavior very frequent in England since my return ; where a little contemptible varlet, without the least title to birth, person, wit, or common sense, shall presume to look with, import- ance, and put himself upon a foot with the greatest per- sons of the kingdom. I was every day furnishing the court with some ridicu- lous story; and Glumdalclitch, although she loved me to excess, yet was arch enough to inform the queen, whenever I committed any folly that she thought would be divert- ing to her majesty. The girl, who had been out of order, was carried by her governess to take the air about an hour's distance, or thirty miles from town. They alighted out of the coach near a small footpath in a field, and Glumdalclitch setting down my travelling box, I went out of it to walk. There was a cowdung in the path, and I must need try my activity by attempting to leap over it. I took a run, but unfortunately jumped short, and found myself just in the middle, up to my knees. I waded through with some difficulty, and one of the foot- men wiped me as clean as he could with his handkerchief, for I was filthily bemired; and my nurse confined me to my box, till we returned home; where the queen was soon informed of what had passed, and the footmen spread it about the court: so that all the mirth for some days was at my expense. 240 Gulliver's travels; CHAPTER VI. SEVERAL CONTRIVANCKS OF THE AUTHOR TO PLEASB THE KINO AND QUEEN — HE SHOWS HIS SKILL IN MUSIC — THE KING INQUIRES INTO THE STATE OE ENGLAND, WHICH THE AUTHOR HELATES TO HIM — THE king's OBSERVATIONS THEREON. ijOINED as I was to the court, I used to attend the king's levee once or twice a week, and had often seen him under the barber's hand, which indeed was at first very terrible to behold : for the razor was almost twice as long as an ordinary scythe. His majesty, according to the custom of the country, was only shaved twice a week. I once prevailed on the barber to give me some of the suds or lather, out of which I picked forty or fifty of the strongest stumps of hair. I then took a piece of fine wood, and cut it like the back of a comb, making several holes in it at equal distances, with as small a needle as I could get from Glumdalclitch. I fixed in the stumps so artificially, scraping and sloping them with my knife towards the points, that I made a very tolerable comb; which was a seasonable supply, my own being so much broken in the teeth, that it was almost useless: neither did I know any artist in that country so nice and exact, as would undertake to make me another. And this puts me in mind of an amusement, wherein I spent many of my leisure hours. I desired the queen's woman to save for me the combings of her majesty's hair, whereof in time I gol a good quantity ; and consulting A VOYAGtE TO BROBDINGNAG. 241 with my friend the cabinet-maker, wlio had received general orders to do little jobs for me, I directed him to make two chair frames, no larger than those I had in my box, and to bore little hoks with a fine awl, round those parts where I designed the backs and seats : through these holes I wove the strongest hairs I could pick out, just after the manner of cane chairs in England. When they were finished, I made a present of them to her majesty, who kept them in her cabinet, and used to show them for curiosities, as indeed they were the wonder of every one that beheld them. The queen would have had me sit upon one of these chairs, but I absolutely refused to obey her, protesting I would rather die a thousand deaths, than place a dishonorable part of my body on those precious hairs that once adorned her majes- ty's head. Of these hairs (as I had always a mechanical genius) I likewise made a neat little purse, about five feet long, with her majesty's name deciphered in gold letters, which I gave to Glumdalclitch by the queen's consent. To say the truth, it was more for show than use, being not of strength to bear the weight of the lafger coins, and therefore she kept nothing in it but some little toys that girls are fond of. The king, who delighted in music, had frequent concerts at court, to which I was sometimes carried, and set in my box on the table to hear them ; but the noise was so great that I could hardly distinguish the tunes. I am confident that all the drums and trumpets of a royal army, beating and sounding t&gether just at your ears, could not equal it. My practice was to have my box removed from the i)lace where the performers sat, as far as I could, then to shut the doors and windows of it, and draw the window cur- tains, after which I found their music not disagreeable. I had learned in my youth to play a little upon the 16 242 Hpinet. Glunidalclitch kept one in her chamber, and & master attended twice a week to Icacii her : I called it a spinet, because it somewhat resembled that instrument, and was j)layed upon in the same manner. A fancy came into my head that I would entertain the king and queen with an English tune upon this instrument. But this appeared extremely difficult; for the spinet was near sixty feet long, each key being almost a foot wide, so that with my arms extended I could not reach to above five keys, and to press them down required a good smart stroke with my fist, Avhich would be too great a labor and to no purpose. The method I contrived was this : I prepared two round sticks about the bigness of common cudgels; they were thicker at one end than the other, and I covered the thicker ends with pieces of a mouse's skin, that by rapping on them I might neither damage the tops of the keys nor interrupt the sound. Before the spinet a bench was placed, about four feet below the keys, and I was put upon the bench. I ran sidelong upon it, that way and this, as fast as I could, banging the proper keys with my two sticks, and made a shift to play a jig, to the great satisfaction of both their majesties; but it was the most violent exercise I ever un- derwent ; and yet I could not strike above sixteen keys, nor, consequently, play the bass and treble together, as other artists do ; which was a great disadvantage to my performance. The king, who, as I before observed, was a prince of ex- cellent understanding, would frequently order that I should be brought in my box, aud set upon the table in his closet: he would then commaud me to bring one of my chairs out of the box, and sit down within tiircc yards' distance, upon the top of the cabinet, which brought me almost to a level with his face. In this manner I had several conversations A VOYAGE XO BROBDINGNAG. 243 .with him. I one day took the freedom to tell his majesty, " that the contempt he discovered towards Europe, and the rest of the world, did not seem answerable to those excel ■ lent qualities of mind that he was master of; that reason did not extend itself with the bulk of the body ; on the contrary, we observed iii our country, that the tallest per- sons were usually the least provided with it; that among other auimals, bees and ants had the reputation of more industry, art, and sagacity than many of the larger kinds ; and that, as inconsiderable as he took me to be, I hoped I miglit live to do his majesty some signal service." The king heard me with attention, and began to conceive a much better opinion of me than he had ever before. He desired " I would give him as exact an account of the gov- ernment of England as I possibly could ; because, as fond as- ^jrinces commonly are of their own customs (for so he conjectured of other monarchs by my former discourse), he should be glad to hear of anything that might deserve imitation." Imagine with thyself, courteous reader, how often I then wished for the tongueof . Demosthenes or Cicero, that might have enabled me to celebrate the praise of my own dear native country, in a style equal to its merits and felicity. I began my discourse by informing his majesty, that our dominions consisted of two islands, which composed three mighty kingdoms, under one sovereign, besides our plantations in America. I dwelt long upon the fertility of our soil, and the temperature of our climate. I then spoke at large upon the constitution of an English Parlia- ment; partly made up of an illustrious body, called the House of Peers ; persons of the noblest blood, and of the most ancient and ample patrimonies. I described that extraordinary care always taken of their education iii art 244: GULLIVER'S TRAVELS: and arms, to qualify them for being counsellors both to the king and kingdom; to have a share in the legisla- ture; to be members of the highest court of judicature, whence there can be no appeal ; and to be champions al- ways ready for the defence of their prince and country, by their valor, conduct, and fidelity. That these were the orna- ment and bulwark of the kingdom, worthy followers of their most renowned ancestors, whose honor had been tiie reward of their virtue, from which their posterity were never once known to degenerate. To these were joined several holy persons, as part of that assembly, under the title of bishops, whose peculiar business it is to take care of religion, and of those who instruct the people therein. These were searched and sought out through the whole na- tion, by the prince and his wisest counsellors, among such of the priesthood as were most deservedly distinguished by the sanctity of their life, and the depth of their erudition ; who were indeed the spiritual fathers of the clergy and the people.* * The doctrines of passive obedience and non-resistiince, so strenu- ously maintained by many eminent English divines, rendered the Church an object of suspicion to the several Whig cabinets, and min- isterial patronage was exerted to weaken the political influence of the Church by promoting persons not likely to maintain the claims of ecclesiastical poWer. Not only Swift, but many others, complained that the Church was betrayed by the State, and that the secular power was directly exerted to overthrow episcopal authority. Bishop War- burton, in oneof his letters, urges this complaintwith his usualforce, vulgarity, and mannerism ; the passage is also remarkable for a Brob- dingnagian image worthy of Swift himself. " You mention Noah's ark. I have really forgot what I said of it. But I suppose I com- pared it to the Church, as many a grave divine has done before me. The rabbins make the giant Gog or Magog contemporary with Noah, and convinced by his preaching ; so that he was disposed-to take the benefit of the ark But here lay the distress; it by no means suited A VOYAflE TO brobdin&Mag. 245 That the other part of the Parliament consisted of an as- sembly, called the House of Commons, who were all prin- cipal gentlemen, freely picked and culled out by the people themselves, for their great abilities and love of their coun- try, to represent the wisdom of the whole nation. And that these two bodies made up the most august assembly in Europe, to whom, in conjunction with the prince, the whole legislature is committed. I then descended to the courts of justice ; over which the judges, those^ venerable sages and interpreters of the law, presided, for determining the disputed rights and prop- erties of men, as well as for the punishment of vice and protection of innocence. I mentioned the prudent manage- ment of our treasury ; the valor and achievements of our forces, by sea and land. I computed the number of our people, by reckoning how many millions there might be of each religious sect, or political party among us. I did not omit even our sports and pastimes, or any other par- ticular which I thought might redound to the honor of my his dimensions. Therefore, as he could not enter in, he contented himself to ride upon it astride. And though you must suppose, that in that stormy weather he was more than half boots over, he kept his seat, and dismounted safely when the ark landed on Mount Ararat. Image now to yourself this illustrious cavalier mounted on his hack- ney ; and see if it does not bring before you the Church bestrid by some lumpish minister of state, who turns and winds it at his pleas- ure. The only difference is, that Gog believed the preacher of righte- ousness and religion." The former comparison of the Church to the ark, which Warbur- ton's correspondent appears to have noticed, is not less characteristic. "The Church, like the ark of Noah, is worth saving ; not for the sake of the unclean beasts and vermin that almost filled it, and probably made most noise and clnmor in it, but for the little corner of ration- ality, that was as much distressed by the stink within as by the tempest without." M6 GtJLLIVBR'S TRAVfitS: country. And I finished all with a brief historical account of affairs and events in England for about a hundred years past. This conversation was not ended under five audiences, each of several hours ; and the king heard the whole with great attention, frequently taking notes of what I spoke, as well as memojandums of what questions he intended to ask me. When I had put an end to these long discourses, his majesty, in a sixth audience, consulting his notes, proposed many doubts, queries, and objections, upon every article. He asked, "what methods were used to cultivate-the minds and bodies of our young nobility, and in what kind of busi-ness they commonly spent the first and teachable part of their lives ? What course was taken to supply that assembly, when any noble family became extinct? What qualifications were necessary in those who are to be created new lords : whether the humor of the prince, a sura of money to a court lady, or a design of strengthening a party opposite to the public interest, ever happened to be the motives in those advancements ?* What share of knowl- edge these lords had in the laws of their country, and how they came by it, so as to enable them to decide the proper- ties of their fellow-subjects in the last resort ?■ Whether they were always so free from avarice, partialities, or want, that a bribe, or some other sinister view, could have no place among them ? Whether those holy lords I spoke of were always promoted to that rank upon account of their * A bill for the Limitation of the Peerage was passed by the House of Lords in 1719 ; but after a long debate, was rejected by an over- whelming majority of the Commons. On this occasion, the Tories joined with that section of the Wliigs wliich recognized Walpole as a leader. Swift unconsciously has adopted a portion of the reasoning of his great enemy. A Voyage to BEOfiDiNGNAfl. 247 knowledge in religious matters, and the sanctity of their lives ; had never been complicrs with the times, while they were common priests ; or slavish prostitute chaplains to some nobleman, whose opinions they continued servilely to follow, after they were admitted into that assembly ?"* * Swift very frequently assailed the Irish bench of bishops, assert- ing that they were ignorant of the creed of their own church ; in one of these attacks on the episcopal body, he says, — Of whom there are not four at most Who know there is an Holy Ghost ; And when they boast they have conferr'd it. Like Paul's Ephesians, never heard it; And when they gave it 'tis well known. They gave what never was their own. In another political squib, we find the following bitter lines,— Let prelates by their good behavior, Convince us they believe a Saviour ; Nor sell, what they so dearly bought. This country, now their own, for nought. The Bishop of Kilkenny was particularly obnoxious to the Dean, and bears the brunt of Swift's fierce attack on the Irish bench for proposing to divide the church livings. Old Latimer, preaching, did fairly describe A bisho'p, who ruled all the rest of his tribe : And who is this bishop ? and where did he dwell ? Why, truly, 'tis Satan, Archbishop of Hell ;■ And he was a primate, and he wore a mitre, Surrounded with jewels of sulphur and nitre. How nearly this bishop our bishops resembles I But he has the odds who believes and who trembles. Could you see his Grim Grace, for a pound to a pennyj You'd swear it must be the baboon of Kilkenny ; Poor Satan will think the comparison odious ; I wish I could find him out one more commodious. But this I am sure, the most reverend old dragon Had got on the bench many bishops suffragan ; And all men believe he resides there incog. To give them by turns an invisible jog. 248 He then desired to know, " what arts were practiced in electing those whom I called commoners; whether a stranger with a strong purse, might not influence the vulgar voters to choose him before their own landlord, or the most considerable gentleman in the neighborhood? How it came to pass, that people were so violently bent upon getting into this assembly, which I allowed to be a great trouble and expense, often to the ruin of their families, without any salary or pension ; because this appeared such an exalted strain of virtue and public spirit, that his majesty seemed to doubt it might possibly not be always sincere?"* And he * Considerable excitement was produced by Sir John Cope having charged Sir Francis Page, one of the barons of the Exchequer, with endeavoring to corrupt the borough of Banbury, in order to secure the return of Sir William Codrington at the next election. The charge was heard at the bar of the House of Commons, and though the ministers of the day exerted all their influence to shield the judgp, he was acquitted by a majority of four only, the numbers being 128 to 124. A bill for securing the Freedom of Elections was about the same time rejected by the House of Lords, through the influence of the ministers, who had failed to strangle it in the Commons. This afl'orded the Tories an opportunity of representing themselves as the friends, and the Whigs as the enemies of constitutional liberty, which they were too wise to neglect. During the debate in the Commons, Mr. Huteheson, member for Hastings, used the following language, which seems to have suggested the king of Brobdingnag's queries to Swift ; "But what in God's name can all this tend to ? What other conslruction can any man in common sense put upon all these things, but that there seems to have been a grand design of violence and op- pression, first to humble you, and make your necks pliable to the yoke, and then to finish the work, by tempting the poverty and necessities of the people to sell themselves into the most abject and detestable slavery, for that very money which had been either unnecessarily raised, or mercilessly and unjustly plundered and torn from their very bowels? And thus you may be in a fair way of being beaten by your own weapons. Nor can 1 imagine what inducement men have who run from borough to borough, and purchase their elections at such A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAd. 249 desirea to know, " whether such zeaious gentlemen could have any views of refunding themselves for the charges and troubletliey were at, by sacrificing the public good to the designs of a weak and vicious prince, in conjunction with a corrupted ministry?" He multiplied his questions, and sifted me thoroughly upon every part of this head, pro- posing numberless inquiries and objections, which I think it not prudent or conveniefit to repeat. Upon what I said in relation to our courts of justice his majesty desired to be satisfied in several points : and this I was the better able to do, having been formerly almost ruined by a long suit in chancery, which was decreed for me with costs. He asked, " what time was usually spent in determining between right and wrong, and what degree of expense ? Whether advocates and orators had liberty to plead in causes manifestly known to be unjust, vexatious, or oppressive ? Whether party, in religion or politics, were observed to be of any weight in the scale of justice? Whether those pleading orators were persons educated in the general knowledge of equity, or only in provincial. extravagant rates, unless it be from a strong expectation of being well paid for their votes, and of receiving ample recompense and reward for the secret service they have covenanted to perform here ... It were very much to be wished, that gentlemen of estates and families in the country would heartily unite in this particular, of keeping the elections in the several counties among themselves ; that they would resolve inviolably to support each other'sin teres ts against the encroach- ments and corrupt applications of strangers, let them come from what quarter tbey will. If this were done, it would in a great measure put an end to those dangerous and infamous practices that are now on foot, and we might hope once more to see this House filled with gentlemen of free and independent fortunes, such as would be above making their court anywhere at the expense of their country, and would despise all manner of slavish concessions to men in power." 250 Gulliver's traVelS; national, and other local customs ? Whether they or their judges had any part in penning those laws, ^^'hich they assumed the liberty of interpreting, and glossing upon at their pleasure? Whether they had ever, at different times, pleaded for and against the same cause, and cited prece- dents to prove contrary opinions ? Whether they were a rich or a poor corporation ? Whether they received any pecuniary reward for pleading, or delivering their opinions? And particularly, whether they were ever admitted as members in the lower senate?"* He fell next upon the management of our treasury; and said, " he thought my memory had failed me, because I computed our taxes at about five or six millions a year, and when I came to mention the issues, he found they sometimes amounted to more than double ; for the notes he had taken were very particular in this point, because he hoped, as he told me, that the knowledge of our conduct * In the session of lY20^Sir William Thompson, Solicitor-General, charged Mr. Lechmere, Attorney-General, with breach of his oath, trust, and duty, as a privy councillor, saying that he acted as counsel, and received sums of money for his advice in matters to him referred by the Privy Council as Attorney-General. The charge was investi- gated by a committee of the whole House ; it appeared that Mr. Lechmere had taken nothing but his usual fees as chamber counsellor, and the accusation was declared by the House to be false, scandalous, and malicious. The lawyers of Swift's day were for the most part Whigs, and strongly attached to the Protestant succession ; they were i)n this account particularly odious to the Jacobites, and when indi- vidual satire failed, bitter attacks were made on the entire legal pro- fession. It must, however, be added, that the "Whig lawyers were too ready to extend the dangerous principle of constructive treason, and far too ardent in their prosecutions for libel. Swift was particu- larly hostile to lawyers on account of the vexatious prosecutions undertaken against the printers and publishers of the Drapier's Letters, and he never omits an opportunity of venting his indigna- tion. A VoYAGK to BROJBDINdNAG SSI might be useful to him, and he could not be deceived in his calculations.* But, if what I told him were true, he was still at a loss how a kingdom could run out of its estate, like a private person." He asked me " who were our creditors ; and where we found money to pay them ?" He wondered to hear me talk of such chargeable and ex- pensive wars ; " that certainly M'e must be a quarrelsome people, or live among very bad neighbors, and that our generals must needs be richer than our kings." He asked "what business we had out of our own islands, unless upon the score of trade or treaty, or to defend the coasts with our fleet ?" Above all, he was amazed to hear me talk of a mercenary standing army, in the midst of peace, and among a free people. He said, " if we were governed by our own consent, in the persons of our representatives, he could not imagine of whom we were afraid, or against whom we were to fight ; and would hear my opinion, whether a private man's house might not better be defended by himself, his children, and family, than by half a dozen rascals, picked up at a venture in the streets for small wages, who might get a hundred times more by cutting their throats."t * The National Debt was first incurred by the Whig administra- tions in the reigns ot William III and Queen Anne, when the ordi- nary revenue was found inadequate to the expenses of the great wars against Prance. It was a favorite topic of declamation with their Tory opponents, and was not the least efficacious in depriving the Whiga of their popularity. In 1722, the Tories proposed the follow- ing resolution in the Lords : "That the lessening the public debt annually by all proper methods is necessary to the restoring and se- curing the public credit." The previous question was carried : upon which, a spirited protest was entered on the Journals, and copies of it industriously circulated through the country. ■f- One of the most memorable debates in the reign of George I, was on the grant for maintaining a standing army of sixteen thou- 252 Gulliver's travels; He laughed at my " odd kind of arithmetic," as he Was pleased to call it, "in reckoning the numbers of our people by a computation drawn from the several sects among us in religion and politics."- He said " he knew no reason why those, A\h(j entertain opinions prejudicial to the public, should be obliged to change, or .■^hould not be obliged to conceal them. And as it was tyranny in any government to require the first, so it was weakness not to enforce the second : for a man may be allowed to keep poisons in his closet, but not to vend them about for cordials."* He,observed, " that among the diversions of our nobility and gentry, I had mentioned gaming ; he desired to know at what age this entertainment was usually taken up, and when it was laid down ; how much of their time it em- sand men. Mr. Shippen and Mr.' Jeifries resisted the proposal with great energy, and the former used such severity of language that he was committed to the Tower. The Tories, both on this question and ort the Debt, had a decided advantage in argument over their adver- saries, especially as they could appeal to a parliamentary resolution in the reign of Charles II, which declared, "That the continuance of standing forces in this nation, other than the militia, is illegal, and a great grievance and vexation to the people." Mr. Shippen, in his speech, perplexed the Whigs hy referring to their own recorded principles. "It is," said he, " every year declared in the Act of Mutiny and Desertion, that the keeping up a standing army in time of peace, is against law ; and as the freeing us from it was one of the ends of the Revolution, so no doubt, the preserving us forever from an attempt of the like nature, was one of those innumerable glorious advantages proposed by the Act of Succession." * It is not easy to reconcile these intolerant sentiments with the opinions on toleration already noticed in the Voyage to Lilliput. There was at this time reason to fear that the Presbyterians would obtain the ascendency in the Irish Parliament, and abolish episco- pacy ; hence probably arises Swift's bitterness against sectaries, which is very strongly manifested here, and in his celebrated Letter on the Sacramental Test. A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAG. 253 ployed : whether it ever went so high as to affect their for- tunes ; whether mean, vicious people, by their dexterity in that art, might uot arrive at great riches, and sometimes keep our very nobles in dependence, as well as habituate them to vile companions ; wholly take from them the im- provement of their minds, and force them, by the losses they received,* to learn and practice that infamous dex- terity upon others ?" He was perfectly astonished with the historical account I gave him of our affairs during the last century ; protest- ing it was only a heap of conspiracies, rebellions, murders, massacres, revolutions, banishments, the very -worst effects that avarice, faction, hypocrisy, perfidiousness, cruelty, rage, madness, hatred, envy, lust, malice, and ambition, could produce. His majesty, in another audience, was at the pains to recapitulate the sum of all I had spoken ; compared the questions he made with the answers I had given ; then taking rae into his hands, and stroking me gently, delivered himself in these words, which I shall never forget, nor the manner he spoke them in : " My little friend Grildrig, you have made a most admirable jjanegyric upon your country ; you have clearly proved that ignorance, idleness, and vice, are the proper ingredients for qualifying a legis- lator ; that laws kre best explained, interpreted, and ap- plied, by those whose interest and abilities lie in pervei'ting, confounding, and eluding them. I observe among you some lines of an institution, which in its original might have been tolerable, but these half erased, and the rest wholly blurred and blotted by corruptions. It does not * Eeceiving a loss, is certainly not a good expression; it should be, "the losses they have sustained." — Sheridan. 254 GULLIVER'S travels: appear, from all you have said, how any one perfection is required toward tlie procurement of any one station among you ; much less that men are ennobled on account of their virtue; that priests are advanced for their piety or learn- ing; soldiers, for their conduct or valor; judges, for their integrity ; senators, for the love of their country; or coun- sellors for their wisdom. As for yourself," continued the king, " who have spent the greatest part of your life in travelling, I am well disposed to hope you may hitherto liave escaped many vices of your country. But by what I have gathered from your own relation, and the answers I have with much pains wringed* and extorted from you, I cannot but conclude the bulk of your natives to be the most pernicious race of little odious vermin that nature ever suffered to crawl upon the surface of the earth." * Instead of " wringed," it should have been " wrung." — Sheridan. A VOYAGE TO BROBDINdNAa. 255 CHAPTER VII. THE AUTHOR'S LOVE OF HIS COUHTET — HE MAKES A PROPOSAL OF MUCH ADVANTAGE TO THE KING, WHICH IS REJECTED — THE king's great IGNORANCE IN POLITICS — THE LEARNING OF THAT COUNTRY VERY IMPERFECT AND CONFINED — THE LAWS AND MILITARY AFFAIRS, AND PARTIES IN THE STATE. OVE of truth could alone have hindered me from concealing this part of my story. It was in vain to discover my resentments, which were always turned into ridicule; and I was forced to rest with patience, while my Doble and beloved country was so injuriously treated. I am as heartily sorry as any of my readers can possibly be, that such an occasion was given ; but this prince happened to be so curious and in- quisitive upon every particular, that it could not consist either with gratitude or good manners, to refuse giving him what satisfaction I was able. Yet thus much I may be allowed to say in my own vindication, that I artfully eluded many of his questions, and gave to every point a more favorable turn, by many degrees, than the strictness of truth would allow. For I have always borne that laud- able partiality to my own country, which Dionysius Hali- carnassensis, with so much justice, recommends to an his- torian : I would hide the frailties and deformities of my political mother, and place her virtues and beauties in the most advantageous light. This was my sincere endeavor 256 GULLIVER'S travels: in those many discourses I had with that monarch, al- though it unfortunately failed of success. But great allowances should be given to a king who lives wholly secluded from the rest of the world, and must there- fore be altogether unacquainted with the manners and cus- toms that most prevail in other nations; the want of which luiowledge will ever produce many prejudices, and a cer- tain narrowness of thinking, from which we and the po- liter countries of Europe, are wholly exempted. And it would be hard indeed, if so remote a prince's notions of virtue and vice were to be offered as a standard for all mankind. To confirm what I have now said, and further to show the miserable effects of a confined education, I shall here insert a passage, which will hardly obtain belief. In hopes to ingratiate myself farther into his majesty's favor, I told him of " an invention, discovered between three and four hundred years ago, to make a certain powder, into a heap of which, the smallest spark of fire falling, Avould kindle the whole in a moment, although it were as big as a moun- tain, and make it all fly up in the air together, with a noise and agitation greater than thunder. That a proper quan- tity of this powder rammed into a hollow tube of brass or iron, according to its bigness, would drive a ball of iron or lead, with such violence and speed, as nothing was able to sustain its force. That the largest balls thus discharged, would not only destroy whole ranks of an army at once, but batter the strongest walls to the ground ; sink down ships with a thousand men in each, to the bottom of the sea; and when linked together, by a chain, would cut through ma-sts and rigging, divide hundreds of bodies in the middle, and lay all waste before them. That we often put this powder into large hollow balls of iron, and dis- A VOTAQB TO BROBDINGNAS. 257 charged them by an engine into some city we were besieg- ing, which would rip up the pavements, tear the houses to pieces, burst and throw the splinters on every side, dashing out the brains of all who came near.. That I knew the ingredients very well, which were cheap and common; I understood the manner of compounding them, and could direct his workmen how to make those tubes, of a size proportionable to all other things in his majesty's king- dom, and the largest need not be above a hundred feet long ; twenty or thirty of which tubes, charged with the proper quantity of powder and balls, would batter down the walls of the strongest town in his dominions in a few hours, or destroy the whole metropolis, if ever it should pretend to dispute his absolute commands. This I humbly offered to his majesty, as a small tribute of acknowledgment, in return of so many marks that I had received of his royal favor and protection." The king was struck with horror at the description I had given of these terrible engines, and the proposal I had made.- " He was amazed, how so impotent and grovelling an insect as I" (these were his expressions) "could enter- tain such inhuman ideas, and in so familiar a manner, as to appear wholly unmoved at all the scenes of blood and deso- lation which I had painted, as the common effects of those destructive machines; whereof," he said, "some evil genius, enemy to mankind, must have been the first contriver. As for himself, he protested, that although few things delighted him so much as new discoveries in art or in nature, yet he would rather lose half his kingdom than be privy to such a secret ; which he commanded me, as I valued my life, never to mention any more."* * It is scarcelj- necessary to expose the fallacious reasoning of this passage ; everybody knows that wars have been far less sanguinary 17 258 GULLIVER'S travels: A sti-ange effect of narrow principles and views ! that a prince possessed of every quality which procures venera- tion, love, and esteem ; of strong parts, great wisdom, and profound learning ; endowed with admirable talents, and almost adored by his subjects, should from a nice unneces- sary scruple, whereof in Europe we can have no conception, let slip an opportunity put into his hands that would have made him absolute master of the lives, the liberties, and the fortunes of his people.* Neither do I say this, with the least intention to detract from the many virtues of that excellent king, whose character, I am sensible, will, on this account, be very much lessened iu the opinion of an Eng- lish reader ; but I take this defect among them to have risen from their ignorance, by not having hitherto reduced politics into a science, as the more acute wits of Europe have done. For, I remember very well, in a discourse one day with the king, when I happened to say, "there were several thousand books among us written upon the art of government," it gave him (directly contrary to my inten- tion) a very mean opinion of our understandings. Hepro- sinco the invention of gunpowder than they were before, and that every improvement in the arts of destruction has been followed by a saving of human life. Swift, however, knew that the glories of Marl- borough's campaigns were the chief source of the popularity of the Whigs, and as he could not deny the military merits of these victo- ries, he hoped to weaken their influence by declaiming against wars in general. * It was more than hinted by the Tories, that the House of Bruns- wick intended to make use of the standing army to subvert British liberty. Mr. Shippen, in the speech to which allusion has been al- ready made, said, " That the second paragraph of the King's speech seemed rather to be calculated for the meridian of Germany than Great Britain ; and that the King was a stranger to our language and constitution." It was for these expressions that he was committed to the Tower. A VOYAGE TO BROBDIN'GNAG. 259 fessed both to abominate and despise all mystery, refine- ment, and intrigue, either in a prince or a minister. He could not tell what I meant by secrets of state, where an enemy, or some rival nation, were not in the case. He confined the knowledge of governing within very narrow boundsj to common sense and reason, to justice and lenity, to the speedy determination of civil and criminal causes ; with some other obvious topics, which are not worth con- sidering. And he gave it for his opinion, " that whoever could malve two ears of corn, or two blades of grass, to grow upon a spot of ground, where only one grew before, would deserve better of mankind, and do more essential service to his country, than the whole race of politicians put together."* The learning of this people is very defective; consisting only in morality, history, jjoetry, and mathematics, wherein they must be allowed to excel. But the last of these is wholly applied to what may be useful in life, to the im- provement of agriculture and all mechanical arts; so that among us, it would be little esteemed. And as to ideaie, entities, abstractions, and transcendentals, I> could never drive the least conception into their heads. No law of that country must exceed in words the num- ber of letters in their alphabet, which consists only of two- and-twenty. But indeed few of them extend even to that length. They are expressed in the most plain and simple terms, wherein those people are not mercurial enough to discover above one interpretation : and to write a comment upon any law is a capital crime. As to the decision of * The Tories were always anxious to identify themselves with the agricultural interest, to which Swift consequently loses no opportu- nity of paying a compliment. 260 GULLIVER'S TRAVELS: civil causes, or proceedings against criminals, their prece- dents are so few, that they have little reason to boast of any extraordinary skill in either. They have had the art of printing, as well as the Chi- nese, time out of mind: but their libraries are not very large; for that of the king, which is reckoned the largest, does not amount to above a thousand volumes, placed in a gallery of twelve hundred feet long, whence I had liberty to borrow what books I pleased. The queen's joiner had contrived in one of Glumdalclitch's rooms, a kind of wooden machine five-and-twenty feet high, formed like a standing ladder; the steps were each iifty feet long; it was indeed a movable pair of stairs, the- lowest end placed at ten feet distance from the wall of the chamber. The book I had a mind to read, was put up leaning against the wall : I first mounted to the upper step of the ladder, and turning my face towards the book, began at the top of the page, and so walking to the right or left about eight or ten j)aces, ac- cording to the length of the lines, till I had gotten a little below the level of mine eyes, and then descending gradu- ally till I came to the bottom : after which I mounted again, and began the other i>age in the same manner, and so turned over the leaf, which I could easily do with both my hands, for it was as thick and stiff as a pasteboard, and in the largest folios not above eighteen or twenty feet long. Their style is clear, masculine, and smooth, but not florid; for they avoid nothing more than multiplying un- necessary words, or using various expressions. I have perused many of their books, especially those in history and morality. Among the rest, I was much diverted with a little old treatise, which always lay in Glumdalclitch's bedchamber, and belonged to her governess, a grave elderly A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAQ. 261 gentlewomtin, who dealt in writings of morality and de- votion. The book treats of the weakness of human kind, and is in little esteem except among the women and the vulgar. However, I was curious to see what an author of that country could say upon such a subject. This writer .went through all the usual topics of European moralists, showing "how diminutive, contemptible, and helpless an animal was' man in his own nature: how un- able to defend himself from inclemencies of the air, or the fury of wild beasts : how much he was excelled by one creature in strength, by another in speed, by a third in foresight, by a fourth in industry." He added, "that nature was degenerated in these latter declining ages of the world, and could now produce only small abortive births, in comparison of those in ancient times." He said, "it was very reasonable to think, not only that the species of men were originally much larger, .but also that there must have been giants in former ages : which, as it is as- serted by history and traditiSn, so it has been confirmed by huge bones and skulls, casually dug up in several parts of the kingdom, far exceeding the common dwindled race of men in our days." He argued, " that the very laws of nature absolutely required we should have been made, in the beginning, of a size more large and robust, not so liable to destruction from every little accident, of a tile falling from a house, or a stone cast from the hand of a boy, or being drowned in a little brook." From this way of rea- soning, the author drew several moral applications, useful in the' conduct of life, but needless here to repeat. For my own part, I could not avoid reflecting how universally this talent was spread, of drawing lectures in morality, or indeed rather njatter of discontent and repining, from the quarrels we raise with nature. And I believe, upon a 262 gullivek's travels: strict inquiry, those quarrels might be shown as ill- grounded among us as they are among that people. As to their military affiiirs, they boast that the king's army consists of a hnndred and seventy-six thousand foot, and thirty-two thousand horse: if that may be called an army, which is made up of tradesmen in the several cities, and farmers in the country, whose commanders are only the nobility and gentry, without pay or reward. They are indeed perfect enough in their exercises, and under very good discipline, wherein I saw no great merit; for liow should it be otherwise, where every farmer is under the command of his own landlord, and every citizen under that of the principal men in his own city, chosen, after the manner of Venice, by ballot? I have often seen the militia of Lorbrulgrud drawn out to exercise, in a great field, near the city, of twenty miles square. There were in all not above twenty-five thousand foot, and six thou- sand horse ; but it was impossible for me to compute their number, considering the splice of ground they took up. A cavalier mounted on a large steed might be about ninety feet high. I have seen this whole body of horse, upon a word of command, draw their swords at once, and brandish them in the air. Imagination can figure nothing so grand, so surprising, and so astonishing ! it looked as if ten thousand flashes of lightning were darting at the same time from every quarter of the sky. I was curious to know how this prince, to whose do- minions there is no access from any other country, came to think of armies, or to teach his people the practice of mili- tary discipline. But I was soon informed, both by con- versation and reading their histories; for, in the course of many ages, they have been troubled with the same disease to whicii the whole race of mankind is subject: the nobility A VOYAGE TO BROBDlNGNAG. 263 often contending for power, the people for liberty, and the king for absolnte dominion. All whicli, however happily tempered by the laws of that kingdom, have been some- tinies violated by each of the three parties, and have more than once occasioned civil wars ; the last whereof was happily pnt an end to by this prince's grandfather, in a general composition, and the militia, then settled wifli common consent, has been ever since kept in the strictest duty. 264 Gulliver's travels: CHAPTER VIII. THE KINO AND QUKBN MAKE A PKOGRESS TO THE FEONTIEBS^THE AUTHOR ATTENDS THEM — THE MANNER IN WHICH HE LEAVES THE COtTNTRY VERY PARTICULARLY RELATED — HE RETURNS TO ENGLAND. UNCTURES of perilous circumstances, from which I had already escaped, inspired me with a strong impulse that I should some time re- cover my liberty, though it was impossible to conjecture by what means, or to form any project with the least hope of succeeding. The ship in which I sailed was the first known to be driven within sight of that coast, and the king had given strict orders, " that if at any time another appeared, it should be taken ashore, and with all its crew and passengers brought in a tumbril to Lorbrul- gr.ud." He was strongly bent to get me a woman of mv own size, by whom I might projpagate the breed': but I think I should rather have died than undergone the dis- .grace of leaving a posterity to be kept in cages, like tame canary birds, and perhaps, in time, sold about the kingdom, to persons of quality, for curiosities. I was indeed treated with much kindness : I was the favorite of a great king and queen, and the delight of the whole court ; but it was upon such a foot as ill became the dignity of human-kind. I could never forget those domestic pledges I had left be- hind me. I wanted to be among people with whom I could converse upon even terms, and walk about the streets and A VOYAfiE TO BROBDINGNAG. 265 fields without being afraid of being trod to death like a frog or a young puppy. Bnt my deliverance came sooner than I expected, and in a manner not very con>mon : the whole story and circumstances of which I shall faithfully velafe. I had now been two years in the country : and about the beginning of the third, Glumdalclitch and I attended the king and queen, in a progress to the south coast of the kingdom. I was carried as usual, in my travelling box, which, as I have already described, was a very convenient closet of twelve feet wide. And I had ordered a hammock to be fixed, by silken ropes, from the four corners at the top, to break the jolts when a servant carried me before him on horseback, as I sometimes desired ; and would often sleep in my hammock while we were upon the road. On the roof of ray closet, not directly over the middle of the hammock, I ordered the joiner to cut a hole of a foot square, to give me air in hot weather as I slept; which hole I shut at pleasure, with a board that drew backward and forward through a groove. When we came to our journey's end, the king thought . proper to pass a few days at a palace he has near Flanflas- nic, a city within eighteen English miles of the seaside. Glumdalclitch aiid I were much fatigued : I had gotten a small cold, but the poor girl was so ill as to be confined to her chamber. I longed to see the ocean, which must be the only scene of my escape, if ever it should happen. I pretended to be worse than I really was, and desired leave to take the fresh air of the sea, with a page, whom I was very fond of, and who had sometimes been trusted with me. I shall never forget with what unwillingness Glumdalclitch consented, nor the strict charge she gave the page to be careful of me, bursting at the same time 266 aullivek's travels; into a flood of tears, as if she had some foreboding of what was to happen. The boy toolc me out in my box, about lialf an hour's wallc from the palace, towards the rocks on the seashore. I ordered him to set me down, and lifting up one of my sashes, cast many a wistful melancholy ^ook towards the sea. I found myself not very well, and told the page that I had a mind to take a nap in my hammock, which I hoped would do me good. I got in, and the boy shut the window close down to keep out the cold. I soon fell asleep, and all I can conjecture is, while I slept, the page, thinking no danger could happen, went among the rocks to look for birds' eggs, having before observed him from my window searching about, and picking up one or two in the clefts. Be that as it will, I found myself suddenly awakened with a violent pull upon the ring, which was fast- ened at the top of my box for the convenience of carriage. I felt my box raised very high in the air, and then borne forward with prodigious speed. The first jolt had like to have shaken me out of my hammock, but afterwards the motion was easy enough. I called out several times as loud as I could raise my voice, but all to no purpose. I looked towards my windows, and could see nothing but the clouds and sky. I heard a noise just over my head, like the , clapping of wings, and then began to ])erceive the woful con- dition I was in ; that some eagle had got the cord of my box in his beak, with an intent to let it fall on the rock, like a tor- toise in a shell, and then pick out my body and devour it: for the sagacity and smell of this bird enable him to discover his quarry at a great distance, though better concealed than I could be within a two-inch board. In a little time I ob- served the noise and flutter of wings to increase very fast, and my box was tossed up and down, like a sign in a windy dav. I heard several bangs or buifets, as I thought, given to the A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAG. ^6*J eagle (for such I am certain it must have been that held the cord of my box in his beak), and then, all on a sudden, felt myself falling perpendicularly down, for above a min- ute, but with such incredible swiftness, that I almost lost my breatii. My fall was stopped by a terrible squash, that sounded louder to my ears than the cataract of Niagara;* after which, T was quite in the dark for another minute, and then my box began to rise so high, that I could see light from the tops of the windows. I now perceived I was fallen into the sea. My box, by the weight of my body, the goods that were in it, and the broad plates of iron fixed for strength at the four corners of the top and bottom, floated about five feet deep in water. I did then, and do now suppose, that the eagle which flew away with my box was pursued by two or three others, and forced to let me drop, while he defended himself against the rest, who hoped to share in the prey. The plates of iron fastened at the bottom of the box (for those were the strongest) preserved the balance while it fell, and hindered it from being broken on the sur- face of the water. Every joint of it was well grooved ; and the door did not move on hinges, but up and down like a sash, which kept my closet so tight that very little water came in. I got with much difficulty out of my hammock, having first ventured to draw back the slip-board on the roof already mentioned, contrived on purpose to let in air, for want of which I found myself almost stifled. How often did I then wish myself with my dear Glum- dalclitch, from whom one single hour had so far divided * This cataract is produced by the fall of a conflux of water (formed of the four vast lakes of Canada) from a rocky precipice, the perpen- dicular height of which is one hundred and thirty-seven feet; and it is said to have been heard fifteen leagues. — Hawkesworih. 268 Gulliver's travels: me ! ' And I may say with truth, that in the midst of my own misfortunes I could not forbear lamenting my poor luirso, tlie grief she would suffer for my loss, the displeasure of the queen, and the ruin ol' her fortune. Perhaps many travellers have not been under greater difficulties and dis- tress than I wa.s at this juncture, expecting every moment to see my box dashed to j)ieces, or at least overset by tiie first violent blast or rising wave. A breach in one single pane of glass would have been immediate death : nor couhl anything have preserved the windows, but the strong lat- tice wires placed on the outside, against accidents in travel- ling. I saw the water ooze in at several crannies, although the leaks were not considerable, and I endeavored to stop them as well as I could. I was not able to lift up the roof of my closet, which otherwise I certainly should have done, and sat on the top of it : where I might at least preserve myself some hours longer, than by being shut up (as I may call it) in the hold. Or if I escaped these dangers for a day or two, what could I expect, but a miserable death of cold and hunger? I was for four hours under these cir- cumstances, expecting, and indeed wishing, every moment to be my last. I have already told the reader that there were two strong staples fixed upon that side of my box which had no win- dow ; and into which the servant who used to carry me on horseback, would put a leathern belt, and buckle it about his waist. Being in this disconsolate state, I heard, or at least thought I heard, some kind of grating noise on that side of my box where the staples were fixed ; and soon after I began to fancy that the box was pulled or towed along the sea ; for I now and then felt a sort of tugging, which made the waves rise near the tops of my windows, leaving me almost in the dark. This gave me some faint hopes of A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAG. 269 relief, although I was not able to imagine how it could be brought about. I ventured to unscrew one of my chairs, which were always fastened to the floor ; and having made a hard shift to screw it down again directly under the slipping-board that I liad lately opened, I mounted on the chair, and putting my mouth as near as I could to tlie hole, I called for help in a loud voice, and in all the languages I understood. I then fastened my handkerchief to a stick I usually carried, and thrusting it up the hole, waved it several times in the air, that if any boat or ship were near, the seamen might conjecture some unhappy mortal to be shut up in the box. I found no effect from all I could do, but plainly per- ceived my closet to be mgved along ; and in the space of an hour, or better, that side of the box where the staples were, and had no windows, struck against something that was hard. I apprehended it to be a rock, and found my- self tossed more than ever. I plainly heard a noise upon the cover of my closet, like that of a cable, and the grating of it as it passed through the ring. I then found myself hoisted up, by degrees, at least three feet higher than I was before. Whereupon I again thrust up my sticlt and hand- kerchief, calling for help till I was almost hoarse. In return to which, I heard a great shout repeated three times, giving me such transports of joy, as are not to be conceived but by those who feel them. I now heard a trampling over my head, and somebody calling through the hole with a loud voice, in the English tongue, "If there be anybody below, let them speak." I answered, " I was an English- man, drawn by ill fortune into the greatest calamity that ever any creature underwent, and begged, by all that was moving, to be delivered out of the dungeon I was iu." The voice replied, " I was safe, for my box was fastened 270 gullivbk's travels: to their ship ; and the carpenter fshouid immediately come and saw a hole in the cover, large enough to pull me out." I answered " that was needless, and would take up too much time ; for there was no more to be done, but let one of the crew put his iinger into the rinL"-, and take the box out of the sea into the ship, and so into the captain's cabin."* Some of them, upon hearing me talk so wildly, thought I was mad ; others laughed ; for indeed it never came into my head, that I was now got among people of my own stature and strength. The carpenter came, and in a few minutes sawed a passage about four feet square, then let down a small ladder, upon which I mounted, and thence was taken into the ship in a very weak condition. The sailors were all in amazement, and asked me a thou- sand questions, which I had no inclination to answer. I was equally confounded at the sight of so many pigmies, for such I took them to be, after having so long accustomed mine eyes to the monstrous objects I had left. But the captain, Mr. Thomas "Wileocks, an honest worthy Shrop- shire man, observing I was ready to faint, took me itito his cabin, gave me a cordial to comfort me, and made me turn in upon his own bed, advising me to take a little rest, of which I had great need. Before I went to sleep, I gave him to understand that I had some valuable furniture in my box, too good to be lost : a fine hammock, a handsome * There are several little incidents which show the author to have had a deep knowledge of human nature, and I think this is one. Al- though the principal advantages enumerated by Gulliver in the be- ginning of this chapter, of mingling again among his countrymen, depended on their being of the same size with himself, yet this is for- gotten in his ardor to bo delivered : and he is afterwards betrayed into the same absurdity , by his zeal to preserve his furniture. — Hawkea- worth. A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAQ. 271 field-bed, two chairs, a table, and a cabinet ; that ray closet was hung on all sides, or rather quilted, with silk and cptton ; that if he would let one of the crew bring my c|oSet into his cabin, I would open it there before him, and show him ray goods. The captain, hearing me utter these absurdities, concluded I was raving; however (I suppose to pacify me), he promised to give order as I desired, and going upon deck, sent some of his men down into ray closet, whence (as I afterwards found), they drew up all my goods, and stripped off the quilting ; but the chairs, cabi- net, and bedstead, being screwed to the floor, were much damaged by the ignorance of the seamen, Avho tore them up by force. Then they knocked off some of the boards for the use of the ship, and when they had got all they had a mind for, let the hull drop into the sea, which, by reason of many breaches made in the bottom " and sides, sunk outright. And, indeed, I was glad not to have been a spectator of the havoc they made ; because I am confident it would have sensibly touched me, by bringing former passages into my mind which I would rather have forgot. I slept some hours, but perpetually disturbed with dreams of the place I had left, and the dangers I had es- caped. However, upon waking, I found myself much recovered. It was now about eight o'clock at night, and the captain ordered supper immediately, thinking I had already fasted too long. He entertained me with great kindness, observing me not to look wildly, or talk incon- sistently; and when we were left alone, desired I would give him a relation of my travels, and by what accident I came to be set adrift in that monstrous wooden chest. He said, " that about twelve o'clock at noon, as he was looking through his glass, he spied it at a distance, and thought it was a sail, which he had a mind to make, being not much 272 Gulliver's travels: out of his course, in hopes of buying some biscuit, his own beginning to fall short. That upon coming nearer, and finding his error, he sent out his long boat, to discover what it was ; that his men came back in fright, swearing they had seen a swimming house. That he laughed at their folly, and went himself in the boat, ordering his mun fo take a strong cable along with them. That the weather being calm, he rowed round me several times, observed my windows and wire lattices that defended them. That he discovered two staples upon one side, which was all of boards, without any passage for light. He then commanded his men to row up to that side, and fastening a cable to one of the staples, ordered them to tow my chest, as they called it, toward the ship. When it was there, he gave directions to fasten another cable to the ring fixed in the cover, and to raise up my chest with pulleys, which all the sailors were not able to do above two or three feet. He said, they saw my stick and handkerchief thrust out of the hole, and concluded that some unhappy man must be shut up in the cavity." I asked, " whether he or the crew had seen any prodigious birds in the air, about the time he first dis- covered me ?" To which he answered, " that discoursing this matter with the sailors while I was asleep, one of them said, he had observed three eagles flying towards the north, but remarked nothing of their being larger than the usual size ;" which I suj)pose must be imputed to the great height they werg at ; and he could not guess the reason of my question. I then asked the captain, "how far he reck- oned we might be from land ?" He said, " by the best computation he coujd make, we were at least a hundred leagues." I assured him "that he must be mistaken by almost half, for I had not left the country whence I came, above two hours before I dropped into the sea." Where- A VOYAGE TO BROBDINSNAG. 273 Upon he began again to think that my brain was disturbed, of which he gave me a liint, and advised me to go to bed in a cabin he had provided. I assured him, "I was well refreshed with his good entertainment and company, and as much in my senses as ever I was in my life." He then, grew serious, and desired to ask me freely, " whether I were not troubled in my mind by the consciousness of some enormous crime, for which I was punished, at the com- mand of some prince, by exposing me in that chest ; as great criminals, in other countries, have been forced to sea in a leaky vessel, without provisions : for although he should be sorry to have taken so ill a man into his ship, yet he would engage his word to set me safe ashore, in the first port where we arrived ?" He added, " that his sus- picions were much increased by some very absurd speeches I had delivered at first to his sailors, and afterwards to himself, in relation to my closet or chest, as well as by my odd looks land behavior while I was at supper." I begged his patience to hear me tell my story, which I faithfully did, from the last time I left England, to the moment he first discovered me. And as truth always forces its way into rational minds, so this honest worthy gentle- man, who had some tincture of learning, and very good sense, was immediately convinced of my candor and ve- racity. But, farther to confirm all I had said, I entreated him to give order that my cabinet should be brought, of which I had the key in my pocket ; for he had already in- formed me how the seamen disposed of my closet. I opened it in his 6wn presence, and showed him the small collec- tion of rarities I made in the country from which I had been so strangely delivered. There was the comb I had contrived out of the stnmps of the king's beard, and an- 18 274 GULLIVER'S TRAVELS: other of the same materials, but fixed into a paring of her majesty's thumbnail, which served for the back. There was a collection of needles and pins, from a foot to half a yard long; four wasp stings, like joiners' tacks; some ccHubings of the queen's hair; a gold ring which one day she made me a present of, in a most obliging manner, tak- ing it from her little finger and throwing it over my head like a collar. I desired the captain would please to accept this ring in return of his civilities; wliich he absolutely refused. I showed Iiim a corn that I had cut off, with my own hand, from a maid of honor's toe ; it was about the bigness of a Kentish pippin, and grown so hard, that when I returned to England, I got it hollowed into a cup, and set in silver. Lastly, I desired him to see the breeches I had then on, which were made of a mouse's skin. I could force nothing on hi tn but a footman's tooth, which I observed him to examine with great curiosity, and found he had a fancy for it. He received it with abundance of thanks, more than such a trifle could deserve. It was drawn by an unskilful surgeon, in a mistake, from one of Glum- dalcl itch's men, who was afflicted with the toothache, but it was as sound as any in his head. I got it cleaned, and put it into my cabinet. It was about a foot long, and four inches in diameter. The captain was very well satisfied with this plain rela- tion I had given him, and said, " he hoped, when we re- turned to England, I would oblige the world by putting it on paper, and making it public." My answer was, "that I thought we were overstocked with books of travels ; that nothing could now pass which was not extraordinary; wherein, I doubted some authors less consulted truth tlian their own vanity, or interest, or the diversion of ignorant readers; tliat my story could contain little beside common A VOYAGE TO BR0BDINGNA9. 275 events, without those ornamental descriptions of strange plants, trees, birds, and other animals ; or of the barba- rous customs and idolatry of savage people, with which most writers abound. However, I thanked him for his good opinion, and promised to take the matter into my thoughts." He said, " he wondered at one thing very much, which was to hear me speak so loud ; asking me, whether the king and queen of that country were thick of hearing?" I told him, " it was what I had been used to for above two years past, and that I admired as much at the voices of him and his men, who seemed to me only to whisper, and yet I could hear them well enough. But when I spoke in that country, it was like a man talking in the streets, to another looking out from the top of a steeple, unless when I was placed on a table, or held in any person's hand." I told him, "I had likewise observed another thing, that when I first got into the ship, and the sailors stood all about me, I thought they were the most contemptible little creatures I had ever beheld." For, indeed, while I Avas in that prince's country, I could never endure to look in a glass after, mine eyes had been accustomed to such prodigious objects, because the comparisons gave me so despicable a conceit of myself. The captain said, "that while we were at supper he observed me to look at everything with a sort of wonder, and that I often seemed hardly able to contain my laughter, which he knew not well how to take, but imputed it to some disorder in my brain." I answered, "it was very true; and I wondered how I could forbear, when I saw his dishes of the size of a silver threepence, a leg of pork hardly a mouthful, a cup not so big as a nut- shell ;" and so I went on, describing the rest of his house- hold stuiF and provisions, after the same manner, For^ 276 sulliver's travels: although the queen had ordered a little equipage of all tilings necessary for me, while I was in her service, yet my ideas were wholly taken up with what I saw on every side of me, and I winked at my own littleness as people do at their own faults. The captain understood my raillery very well, and merrily replied with the old English proverb, that he doubted mine eyes were bigger than my belly, for he did not observe my stomach so good, although I had fasted all day ; and, continuing in his mirth, protested, " he would have gladly given a hundred pounds to have seen my closet in the eagle's bill, and afterwards in its fall from so great a height into the sea : which would certainly have been a most astonishing object, worthy to have the description of it transmitted to future ages :" and the com- parison of Phaeton was so obvious, that he could not forbear applying it, although I did not much admire the conceit. The captain having been at Tonquin, was, in his return to England, driven northeastward to the latitude of 4 1 degrees, and longitude of 143. But meeting a trade-wind two days after I came on board him, we sailed southward a long time, and coasting New Holland, kept our course west-southwest, and then south-southwest, till we doubled the Cape of Good Hope. Our voyage was very prosper- ous, but I shall not trouble the reader with a journal of it. The captain called in at one or two ports, and sent in his longboat for provisions and fresh water ; but I never went out of the ship till we came into the Downs, which was on the third day of June, 1706, about nine months , after my escape. I offered to leave my goods in security for payment of my freight, but the captain protested he would not receive one farthing. We took a kind leave of each other, and I made him promise he would come to see A VOTAGIE TO BROBDINGilAGt. 27t me at my house in Eedriff. I hired a horse aud' guide for five shillings, which I borrowed of the captain.* As I was on the road, observing the littleness of the houses, the trees, the cattle, and the people, I began to think myself in Lilliput. I was afraid of trampling on every traveller I met, and often called aloud to them to have them stand out of the way, so that I had like to have gotten one or two broken heads for my impertinence. When I came to my own house, for which I was forced to inquire, one of my servants opening the door, I bent down to go in (like a goose under a gate), for fear of striking my head. My wife ran out to embrace me, but I stooped lower than her knees, thinking she could other- wise never be able to reach my mouth. My daughter kneeled to ask my blessing, but I could not see her till * This exquisitely simple incident yrill probably remind the reader of Campbell's description of Commodore Bynm : In horrid climes, where Chiloe's tempests sweep Tumultuous murmurs o'er the troubled deep, 'Twas his to mourn Misfortune's rudest shock ; Scourged by the winds and cradled on the rock, To wake each joyous morn and search again The famished haunts of solitary men. Whose race unyielding as their native storm, Know not a trace of nature but the form ; Yet at thy call the hardy tar pursued, Pale, but intrepid, sad, but unsubdued. Pierced the deep woods, and hailing from afar The moon's pale planet and the northern star, » Paused at each dreary cry unheard before, Hyenas in the wild, and mermaids on the shore ; Till led by Hope o'er many a cliff sublime. He found a warmer world, a milder clime A home to rest, a shelter to defend. Peace and repose, a Briton and a friend. 2*78 Gulliver's traVbls: she arose, having been so long used to stand with my head and eyes erect to above sixty feet ; and then I went to take her up with one hand by the waist. I looked down upon tlie servants, and one or two friends who were in the house, as if they had been pigmies, and I a giant. I told my wife, " she had been too thrifty, for I found she had starved herself and her daughter to nothing." In short, I behaved myself so unaccountably that they were all of the captain's opinion ^vhen he first saw me, and concluded I had lost my wits. This I mention as an instance of the great power of habit and prejudice. In a little time, I and my family and friends came to a right understanding : but my wife protested I should never go to sea any more ; although my evil destiny so ordered, that she had not power to hinder me, as the reader may know hereafter. In the meantime, I here conclude the Second Part of my unfortunate Voyages. liAMEUT OF QLtlMDALCLlTCH. 276 THE LAMENTATION OF GLUMDALCLITCH FOB THE LOSS OV GRILDRIG. Soon as Glurodalclitch miss'd her pleasing care, She wept, she bluhber'd, and she tore her hair : No British miss sincerer grief has known, Her squirrel missing, or her sparrow flown. She furl'd her sampler, and haul'd in her thread. And stuck her needle into Grildrig's bed ; Then spread her hands, and with a bounce let fall Her baby, like the giant in Guildhall. In peals of thunder now she roars — and now She gently whimpers like a lowing cow ; Yet lovely in her sorrow still appears ; Her locks dishevelled, and her floods of tears Seem like the lofty barn of some rich swain, "When from the thatch drips fast a shower of rain. In vain she searched each cranny of the house. Each gaping chink impervious to a mouse. " Was it for this," she cried, " with daily caie, Within thy reach I set the vinegar ? And flll'd the cruet with the acid tide, While pepper- water- worms thy bait supplied, Where twined the silver eel around thy hook. And all the little monsters of the brook ; Sure in that lake he dropp'd :— my Grilly's drown'd I'' She dragg'd the cruet, and no Grildrig's found. " Vain is thy courage, Grilly, vain thy boast ; But little creatures enterprise the most. Trembling, I've seen thee dare the kitten's paw ; Nay, mix with children as they play'd at taw, Nor fear the marbles as they bounding flew ; Marbles to them, but rolling rocks to you. " Why did I trust thee with that giddy youth ? Who from a page can ever learn the truth ? Versed in court- tricks, that money-loving boy, To some lord's daughter sold the living toy ; Or rent him limb from limb in cruel play, As children tear the wings of flies away : 280 LAMENT OF GLUMD ALCLITCH. From place to place o'er Brobdingnag I'll roam, And never will return ; or bring thee home. But who hath eyes to trace the passing wind ? — How, then, thy fairy footsteps can I find? Dost thou, bewilder'd, wander all alone, In the green thicket of a mossy stone ? Or tumbled from the toadstool's slippery round. Perhaps all maim'd, lie grov'Iing on the ground? Dost thou, embosom'd in the lovely rose, Or sunk within the peach's down, repose? Within the kingcup, if thy limbs are spread. Or in the golden cowslip's velvet head, show me, Flora, 'midst those sweets, the flower Where sleeps my Grildrig in the fragrant bower I " But ah ! I fear thy little fancy roves On little females, and on little loves ; Thy pigmy children, and thy tiny spouse ; The baby playthings that adorn thy house — Doors, windows, chimneys, and the spacious rooms- Equal in size to cells of honeycombs. Hast thou for these now ventured from the shore. Thy bark a bean-shell, and a straw thine oar ? Or in thy box; now bounding on the main — Shall I ne'er bear thyself and house again ? And shall I set thee on my hand no more. To see thee leap the lines, and traverse o'er My spacious palm ? Of stature scarce a span, • Blimic the actions of a real man ? No more behold thee turn my watch's key. As seamen at a capstan anchors weigh ! " How wort thou wont to walk with cautious tread A dish of tea, like milk-pail, on thy head ? Ho'w chase the mite that bore thy cheese away, And keep the rolling maggot at a bay !" She spoke, but broken accents stopp'd her voice. Soft as the speaking-trumpet's mellow noise ; She sobb'd a storm, and wiped her flowing eyes. Which seem'd like two broad suns in misty skies: O squander not thy grief, — those tears command. To weep upon our cod in Newfoundland ; The plenteous pickle shall preserve the fish, And Europe taste thy sorrows in her dish. iC. A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, BALNIBAEBI, LUGGNAGG, GLUBBDUBDEIB, AND JAPAN.* CHAPTER 1. THE ATTTHOR SETS OUT ON HIS THIRD VOYAGE — IS TAKEN BT PI- RATES — THE MALICE OE A DUTCHMAN — HIS ARRIVAL AT AN ISLAND — HE IS RECEIVED IN LAPUTA. HAD not been at home above ten days, when Captain William Robinson, a Cornish man, com- mander of the Hopewell, a stout ship of three hundred tons, came to my house. I had for- merly been surgeon of another ship, where he was master * Dean Swift seems to have borrowed several hints in his Voj'age to liapiita, from a novel written by the learned Dr. Francis Godwin, Bishop of Llandaff, called " The Man in the Moon, or a Discourse of a Voyage Ihither, by Domingo Gonsales, 1638," 8vo. This philo- sophic romance, which has been several times printed, shows that Bishop Godwin had a creative genius. His " Nuncius Inanimatus," which contains instructions to convey secret intelligence, is very scarce. He died in April, 1633. This romance is published in the eighth volume of the Harleian Miscellanies, and is a very ingenious fiction, but it does not bear the slightest resemblance to the Voyage to Laputa. (281 ) 282 auLLiVER^'s tkavels: and fourth part owner, in a voyage to the Levant. He liad always treated me more likr a brother than an infe- rior officer ; and hearing of my arrival, made me a visit, as I apprehended only out of friendship, for nothing passed more than what is usual after long absences. But repeat- ing his visits often, expressing his joy to find me in good health, asking, " wlietlier I was not settled for life?" add- ing "that he intended a voyage to the East Indies in about two months," at last he plainly invited me, though with many apologies, to be surgeon of the ship; "that I should have another surgeon under me, beside our two mates ; that my salary should be doubled to the usual pay ; and that having experienced my knowledge in sea affairs to be at least equal to his, he would enter into any engage- ment to follow my advice, as much as if I had shared in the command." He said so many other obliging things, and I knew him to be so honest a man, that I could not reject his proposal ; the thirst I had of seeing the world, notwithstanding my past misfortunes, continuing as violent as ever. The only difficulty that remained, was to persuade my wife, whose consent however I at last obtained, by. the prospect of ad- vantage she proposed to her children. We set out on the 5th day of August, 1 706, and arrived at Fort St. George* the lltli of April, 1707. We stayed there three weeks to refresh our crew, many of whom were sick. From thence we went to Tonquin, where the captain resolved to continue some time, because many of the goods he intended to buy were not ready, nor could he expect to be dispatched in several months. Therefore, in hopes to defray some of the charges he must be at, he bought a sloop, * Now Madras. A VoYAGE to LAPiJTA, ETC. 283 loaded it with several sorts of goods, wherewith the Ton- quinese usually trade to the neighboring islands, and put- ting fourteen men on board, whereof three were of the country, he appointed me master of the sloop, and gave me power to traffic, while he transacted his affairs at Tonquin. We had not sailed above three days, when a great storm amsing, we were driven five days to the north-northeast, and then to the east : after which we had fair weather, but still with a pretty strong gale from the west. Upon the tenth day we were chased by two pirates, who soon over- took us; Tor my sloop was so deep laden, that she sailed •very slow, neither were we in a condition to defend our- selves. We were boarded about the same time by both the pirates, who entered furiously at the head of their men; but finding us all prostrate upon our faces (for so I gave order), they pinioaed us with strong ropes, and setting a guard upon us, went to search the sloop. I observed among them a Dutchman, who seemed to be of some authority, though he was not commander of either ship. He knew us by our countenances to be Englishmen, -and jabbering to us in our own language, swore we should be tied back to back and thrown into the sea. I spoke Dutch tolerably well; I told him whom we were, and begged hira, in consideration of our being Christians and -Protestants, of neighboring countries in strict alliance, that he would move the captains to take some pity on us. This inflamed his rage ; he repeated the threatenings, and turn- ing to his companions, spoke with great vehemence in the Japanese language, as I suppose, often using the word Christianas. The largest of the two pirate ships was commanded by a Japanese captain who spoke a little Dutch, but very im- perfectly. He came up to me, and after .several questions, 284 Gulliver's travels: which I answered in great numility, he said, "we shouU not die." I made the captain a very low bow, and then turning to the Dutchman, said, " I was sorry to find more mercy in a Heathen than in a brother Christian." But I liad soon reason to repent those foolish words: for that malicious reprobate, having often endeavored in vain to persuade both the captains that I might be thrown into the sea (which they would not yield to, after the promise made me that I should not die), however prevailed so far, as to have a punishment inflicted on me, worse, in all human appearance, than death itself. My men were sent by an equal division into both the pirate ships, and my sloop new manned. As to myself, it was determined that I should be set adrift in a small canoe, with paddles and a sail, and four days' provisions ; which last, the Japanese captain was so kind as to double out of his own stores, and would permit no man to search me. I got down into the canoe, while the Dutchman, standing upon the deck, loaded me with all the curses and injurious terms his language could afford. About an hour before we saw the pirates, I had taken an observation, and found we were in the latitude of 46 N. and longitude of 183. When I was at some distance from the pirates, I discovered by my pocket-glass, several islands to the southeast. I set up my sail, the wind being fair, with a design to reach the nearest of those islands, which I made a shift to do, in about three hours. It was all rocky : however I got many birds' eggs ; and striking fire, I kindled some heath and dry seaweed, by which I roasted my eggs. I ate no other supper, being resolved to spare my provisions as much as I could. I passed the night under the shelter of a rock, strewing some heath under me, and slept pretty well. The next day I sailed to another A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 285 island, and thence to a third and fourth, sometimes using' my sail, and sometimes my paddles. But not to trouble the reader with a particular account of my distresses, let it suffice, that on the fifth day I arrived at the last island in my sight, which lay south-southeast to the former. This island was at a greater distance than I expected, and I did not reach it in less than five hours. I encom- passed it almost round, before I could find a convenient place to land in ; which was a small creek, about three times the wideness of my canoe. I found the island to be all rocky, only a little intermingled with tufts of grass, and sweet-smelling herbs. I took out my small provisions, and after having refreshed myself, I secured the remainder in a cave, whereof there were great numbers ; I gathered plenty of eggs upon the rocks, and got a quantity of dry seaweed and parched grass, which I designed to kindle the next day, and roast my eggs as well as I could, for I had about me my flint, steel, match, and burning-glass. I lay all night in the cave where I had lodged my provisions. My bed was the same dry grass and seaweed which I in- tended for fuel. I slept very little, for the disquiets of my mind prevailed over my weariness, and kept me awake. I considered how impossible it was to preserve my life in so desolate a place, and how miserable my end must be : yet found myself so listless and desponding, that I had not the heart to rise ; and before I could get spirits enough to creep out of my cave, the day was far advanced. I walked awhile among the rocks: the sky was perfectly clear, and the sun so hot, that I was forced to turn my face from it; when all on a sudden it became obscure, as I thought, in a manner very different from what happens by the interi)osition-of a cloud. I turned back, and perceived a vast opaque body between me and the sun, moving forwards towards the 286 GULLIVER'S TRAVELS: island ; it seemed to be about two miles high, and hid the sun six or seven minutes ; but I did not observe the air to be much colder, or the sky more darkened, than if I had stood under the shade of a mountain. As it approached nearer over the place where I was, it appeared to be a firm substance, the bottom flat, smooth, and shining very bright, from the reflection of the sea below. I stood upon a height about two hundred yards from the shore, and saw this vast body descending almost to a parallel with me, at less than an English mile distance. I took out my pocket perspec- tive, and could plainly discover numbers of people moving up and down the sides of it, which appeared to be sloping; but what those people were doing I was not able to dis- tinguish. The natural love of life gave me some inward motion of joy, and I was ready to entertain a hope that this ad- venture might, some way or other, help to deliver me from the desolate place and condition I was in. But at the same time, the reader can hardly conceive my astonish- ment, to behold an island in the air, inhabited by men, who were able (as it should seem) to rise or sink, or put it into progressive motion, as they pleased. But not being at that time in a disposition to philosophize upon this phenomenon, I rather chose to observe what course the Island would take, because it seemed for awhile to stand still. Yet soon after, it advanced nearer, and I could see the sides of it encompassed with several gradations of gal- leries, and stairs at certain intervals, to descend from one to the other. In the lowest gallery, I beheld some people fishing with long angling-rods, and others looking on. I waved my cap (for my hat was long since worn out) and my handkerchief towards the island; and upon its nearer approach, I called and shouted with the utmost strength A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 287 of my voice; and then looking circumspectly, I beheld a crowd gathered to that side which was most in my view. I found by their pointing toward me and to each other, that they plainly discovered me, although they made no return to my shouting. But I could see four or five men running in great haste up the stairs, to the top of the island, who then disappeared. I happened rightly to con- jecture, that these were sent for orders, to some person in authority, upon this occasion. The number of people increased, -and in less than half an hour the island was moved, and raised in such a man- ner, that the lowest gallery appeared in a parallel of less than a hundred yards' distance from the height Avhere I stood. I then put myself in the most supplicating pos- tures, and spoke in the humblest accent, but received no answer. Those who stood nearest over against me, seemed to be persons of distinction, as I supposed by their habit. They conferred earnestly with each other, looking often upon me. At length one of them called out in a clear, polite, smooth dialect, not unlike in sound to the Italian: and therefore I returned an answer in that language, hop- ing at least that the cadence might be more agreeable to his ears. Although neither of us understood the other, yet my meaning was easily known, for the people saw the distress I was in. They made signs for me to come down from the rock, and go towards the shore, which I accordingly did ; and the flying island being raised to a convenient height, the verge directly over me, a chain was let down from the lowest gallery, with a seat fastened to the bottom, to which I fixed myself, and was drawn up by pulleys. 288 GULLIVER'S travels: CHAPTER II. THE HUMORS AND DISPOSITIONS Or THE LAPUTIANS DESCBIBED — AN ACCOUNT OF THEIR LEARNING — OF THU KING AND HIS COURT — THE author's RECEPTION THERE — THK INHABITANTS SUBJECT TO FEAR AND DISQUIETUDES — AN ACCOUNT OF THE WOMEN. T ray alighting, I was surrounded with a crowd of people, but those who stood nearest seemed to be of better quality. They beheld me with all the marks and circumstances of wonder, neither indeed was I much in their debt; having never till then seen a race of mortals so singular in their shapes, habits, and countenances. Their heads were all reclined, either to the right or the left ; one of their eyes turned in- ward, and the other directly up to the zenith.* Their outward garments were adorned with the figures of suns, moons, and stars ; interwoven with those of fiddles, flutes, harps, trumpets, guitars, harpsichords, and many instru- ments of music, unknown to us in Europe. I observed, here and there, many in the habit of servants, with a blown bladder, fastened like a flail to the end of a stick, which they carried in their hands. In each bladder Avas a small quantity of dried peas, or little pebbles, as I was afterwards informed. With these bladders they now and then flapped * By this description the author intended to ridicule those who waste life in speculative sciences, the powers of whose minds are as absurdly employed as the eyes of the Laputians. — Hawk^sworth, A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 289 the mouths and ears of those who stood near theru, of which practice I could not then conceive the meaning. It seems tiie minds of these people are so taken up with intense speculations, that they neither can speak, nor attend to the discourses of others, without being roused by some external action upon the organs of s[)eech and hearing: for which reason, those persons who art; able to afford it always keep a flapper (the original is dimeiiolc), in their family, as one of their domestics ; nor ever walk abroad, or make visits, without him. And the business of this officer is, when two, three, or more persons are in company, gently to strike with his bladder the mouth of him who is to speak, and the right ear of him or them to whom the speaker addresses himself. This flapper is likewise employed diligently to attend his master in his walks, and upon occasion to give him a soft flap on his eyes; because he is always so wrap- ped up in cogitation, that he is in manifest danger of falling down every precipice, and bouncing his head against every post: and in the streets, of jostling others, or being jostled himself into the kennel. It was necessary to give the reader this information, without which he would be at the same loss with me to understand the proceedings of these people, as they con- ducted me up the stairs to the top of the island, and from thence to the royal j)alace. While we were ascending they forgot several times wiiat the}' were about, and left me to myself, till their memories were again roused by their flap- pers: for they appeared altogether unmoved by the sight of my foreign habit and countenance, and by the shouts of the vulgar, whose thoughts and minds were more disen- gaged. At last we entered the palace, and proceeded into the chamber of presence, where I saw the king seated on his 19 290 GULLIVER'S -travels: throne, attended on each side by persons of prime qnality. Before the throne was a large table filled with globes and spheres, and mathematical instruments of all kinds. His majesty took not the least notice of us, although our en- trance was not without sufficient noise, by the concourse of all persons belonging to the court. But he was then deep in a problem ; and we attended at least an hour, be- fore he could solve it. There stood by him, on each side, a young page with flaps in their hands, and when they saw he was at leisure^ one of them gently struck his mouth, and the other his right ear : at which he startled like one awaked on the sudden, and looking towards me and the company I was in, recollected the occasion of our coming, whereof he had been informed before. He spoke some words, where- upoa immediately a young man with a flap came up to my side, and flapped me gently on the right ear ; but I made signs, as well as I could, that I had no occasion for such an instrument ; which, as I afterwards found, gave his maj- esty, and the whole court, a very mean opinion of my un- derstanding. The king, as far as I could conjecture, asked me several questions, and I addressed myself to him in all the languages I had. When it was found I could neither understand, nor be understood, I was conducted by his order to an apartmentin his palace (this prince being distinguished above all his predecessors for his hospitality to strangere), where two servants were appointed to attend me. My din- ner was brought, and four persons of quality, whom I re- membered to have seen very near the king's person, did me the honor to dine with me. We had two courses, of three dishes each. In the first course, there was a shoulder of mutton cut into an ecjuilateral triangle, a piece of beef into a rhomboides, and a pudding into a cycloid. The second course was two ducks trussed up in the forms of fiddles; ETC. 291 sausages and i)iid(lings resembling flutes and hautboys, and a breast of veal in the shape of a harp. The servants cut our bread into cones, cylinders, parallelograms, and several other mathematical figures. AVhile we were at dinner, I made bold to ask the names of several things in their language, and those noble per- sons, by the assistance of their flappers, delighted to give me answers, hoping to raise my admiration of their great abilities, if I could be brought to converse with them. I was soon able to call for bread and drink, or whatever else I wanted. After dinner, my company withdrew, and a person was sent to me by the king's order, attended by a flapper. He brought with him, pen, ink, and paper, and three or four books, giving me to understand by signs, that he was sent to teach me the language. We sat together four hours, in which time I wrote down a great number of words in co'nrans, with the translations over against them: I like- wise made a shift to learn several short sentences; for my tutor would order one of my servants to fetch something, to turn about, to make a bow, to sit, or to stand, to walk, and the like. Then I took down the sentence in writing. He showed ine also, in one of his books, the figures of the sun, moon, and stars, the zodiac, the tropics, and polar circles, together with the denominationsi of many planes and solids. He gave me the names and descriptions of all the musical instruments, and the general terms of art in playing on each of them. After ho had left me, I placed all my words, with their interpretations, in alphabetical order. And thus, in a few days, by the help of a very faithful memory, I got some insight into their language. The word, which I interpret the flying or floating island, is in the original Laputa, whereof I could never learn the 292 Gulliver's travels: true ctyinoloa;y. Lap, in the old obsolete language, sig- nifies liigli; and nntuh, a governoi-; from which they say, by corruption, was derived Laputa from Lapmntuh. But I do not approve of this derivation, which seems to bo a little strained. I ventured to offer to the learned among them a conje(!ture of my own, that Laj)uta was quasi lap outed; lap, signifying properly, the dancing of the sun- beams in tlic sea, and oided, awing; which, however, I shall not obtrude, but submit to the judicious reader.* Those to whom the king had intrusted me, observing how ill I was clad, ordered a tailor to come next morning, and take measure for a suit of clothes. This operator did his office after a different manner from those of his trade in Europe. He first took my altitude by a quadrant, and then, M'ith rule and compasses, described the dimensions and outlines of my whole body, all which he entered upon paper; and in six days brought my clothes very ill made, and quite out of shape, by happening to mistake a figure in the calculation. But my comfort was, that I observed such accidents very frequent, and little regarded. f During my confinement for want of clothes, and by an indisposition that held me some days longer, I much en- larged my dictionary ; and when I next went to court, was able to understand many things the king spoke, and to return him some kind of answers. His majesty had given orders, that the island should move northeast and by east to the vertical point over Lagado, the nietroj)olis * This amusiTig biirlesquo on philology was probably directed against Dr. Bentley, iind is scarcely an exaggeration of some of his derivations. f It is generally supposed that Swift alludes hero to an error made by Sir Isaac Newton's printer, who by adding a cipher to the distance of the earth from the sun, caused not a little ridicule to be thrown on the philosophe'j's astronomical calculations. A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 293 of the whole kingdom below, upon the firm earth. It was about ninety leagues distant, and our voyage lasted four days and a half. 1 was not in the least sensible of the progressive motion made in the air by the island. On the second morning, about eleven o'clock, the king himself in person, attended by his nobility, courtiers, and officers, hav- ing ])repared all their musical instruments, played on them for three hours without intermission, so that I was quite stunned with the noise: neither could I possibly guess the meaning, till my tutor informed me. He said, " that the people of their island had their ears adapted to hear the music of the spheres, which always played at certain periods, and the court was now prepared to bear their part, in whatever instrument they most excelled."* In our journey towards Lagado, the capital city, his majesty ordered that the island should stop over certain towns and villages, from whence he might receive the pe- titions of his subjects. And to this purpose several pack- threads were let down, with small weights at the bottom. On these packthreads the people strung their petitions, which mounted up directly, like the scraps of paper fast- ened by schoolboys at the end of the string that holds their kite. Sometimes we received wine and victuals from below, which were drawn up by pulleys. The knowledge I had in mathematics gave me great as- sistance in acquiring their phraseology, which dependeolitics, perpotually inquiring into public affairs, givirig A Voyage to laputa, etc. 295 their judgments in matters of state, and passionately dis- puting every inch of a party opinion. I have indeed ob- served the same disposition among most of the matliema- ticians I have known in Europe, although I could never discover the least analogy between the two sciences ; unless those people suppose, that because the smallest circle has as many degrees as the largest, therefore the regulation and management of the world require no more abilities than the handling and turning of a globe: but I rather take this quality to spring from a very common infirmity of human nature, inclining us to be most curious and conceited in matters where we have least concern, and for which we are least adapted by study or nature. These people are under continual disquietudes, never en- joying a minute's peace of mind : and their disturbances proceed from causes which 'very little aifect th.e rest of mortals. Their apprehensions arise from several changes they dread in the celestial bodies: for instance, that the earth, by the continual approaches of the sun towards it, must, in course of time, be absorbed, or swallowed up; that the face of the sun will, by degrees, be incrusted with its own effluvia, and give no more light to the world ; that the earth very narrowly escaped a brush from the tail of the last comet, which would have infallibly reduced it to ashes ; and that the next, which they have calculated for one-and-thirty years hence, will probably destroy us. For if, in its perihelion, it should approach within a certain de- gree of the sun (as by their calculations they have reason to dread), it will receive a degree of heat ten thousand times more intense than that of red-hot glowing iron ; and, in its absence from the sun, carrying a blazing tail ten hun- dred thousand and fourteen miles long, through which, if the earth should pass at the distance of one hundred thou- 296 gdlliver's travkls; sand miles from the nucleus, or main body of the eoinel, it must in its passage be set on fire, and reduced to ashes; that the sun, daily spending its rays without any nutriment to supply thcni, will at lust be wholly consumed and anni- hilated ; which must be attended with the destruction of this earth, and of all the planets that receive their light from it.*J They are so perpetually alarmed with the apprehensions of these, and the like impending dangers, that they can neither sleep quietly in their beds, nor have any relish for the common pleasures and amusements of life. When they meet an acquaintance in the morning, the first question is about the sun's health ; how he looked at his setting and * Many such theories have been proposed by persons eminent in their day for mathematical knowtedge. The supposition that all the bodies in the universe arc approaching a common centre, where they will meet and crush each other to chaos, is magnificently set forth in the following lines from Darwin's " Botanic Garden;" KoU on, ye stars, exult in youthful prime ; Mark with bright curves the printless steps of time Near and more near your beamy cars approach. And lessening orbs on lessening orbs encroach.. Flowers of the sky ! ye too to ago shall yield, Frail as your silken sisters of the field ; Star after star from Heaven's high arch shall rush, Suns sink on suns, and systems systems crush. Headlong, extinct to one dark centre fall. And death and night and chaos mingle all. Till overhead, emerging from the slorm. Primeval nature lifts her changeful form, Mounts from her funeral pyre on wings of flame. And soars and shines, another and the same. The fallacy of the theory has, however, been demonstrated, and the phpnomeua by which it seemed to be supported have been satisfac torily explained. A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 297 rising, and what hopes they have to avoid tlic stroke of the approaching comet.* Tiiis conversation they are apt to run into with the same temper that boys discover in delighting to liear terrible stories of spirits and hobgoblins, which tliey greedily listen to, and dare not go to bed for fear. The women of the island have abundance of vivacity ; they contemn their husbands, and are exceedingly fond of strangers : whereof there is always a considerable number from the continent below, attending at court, either upon affairs of the several towns and corporations, or their own particular occasions, but are much despised, because they want the same endowments. Among these, the ladies choose their gallants ; but the vexation is, that they act with too much ease and security ; for the husband is always so wrapped in speculation, that the mistress and lover may proceed to the greatest familiarities before his face, if he be but provided with paper and implements, and without his flapper at his side. The wives and daughters lament their confinement to the island, although I think it the most delicious spot of ground in the world : and although they live here in the greatest plenty and magnificence, and are allowed to do whatever they please, they long to see the world, and take the diver- sions of the metropolis;, which they are not allowed to do without a particular license from the king ; and this is not easy to be obtained, because the people of quality have found, by frequent experience, how hard it is to jjcrsuade their women to^return from below. I was told, that a great courl * The dread of comets continued even amongst the learned to a very late period. It is now generally known that the density of these bodies is very small, and consequently, that a stroke from one of thenn would probably not produce much mischief. 298 Gulliver's travels: lady, who had several children, — is married to the prime minister, the richest subject in the kingdom, a very graceful person, extremely fond of her, and lives in the finest palace in the island, — went down to Lagado on the pretence of health, there hid herself for several months, till the king sent a warrant to search for her ; and she was found in an obscure eating-house all in rags, having pawned her clothes to maintain an old deformed footman, who beat her every day, and in whose company she was taken, much against her will. And although her husband received her with all possible kindness, and without the least reproach, she soon after contrived to steal down again, with all her jewels, to the same gallant, and has not been heard of since. This may perhaps pass with the reader rather for an European or English story, than for one of a country so remote. But he may please to consider, that tlie caprices of womenkind are not limited by any climate or nation, and that they are much more uniform than can be easily imagined. In about a month's time, I had made a tolerable profi- ciency in their language, and was able to answer most of the king's questions, when I had the honor to attend him. His majesty discovered not the least curiosity to inquire into the laws, government, history, religion, or manners of the countries where I had been ; but confined his questions to the state of mathematics, and received the account I gave him with great contempt and indifference, though often roused by his flapper on each side. A voyagb to laputa, etc. 299 r-» CHAPTER III. A PHENOMENON SOLTED BY MODERN PHILOSOPHY AND ASTRONOMY— THE LAPUTIANS' GREAT IMPROVEMENTS IN THE LATTER — THE king's METHOD OP SUPPRESSING INSURRECTIONS. EALOUSY of foreigners is so common every- where, that before making any researches, I re- quested leave of the prince to see the curiosities of the island, which he was graciously pleased to grant, and ordered my tutor to attend me. I chiefly wanted to know, to what cause in art or in nature it owed its several motions, whereof I will now give a philosophi- cal account to the reader. The flying or floating island is exactly circular, its di- ameter 7837 yards, or about four miles and a half, and consequently contains ten thousand acres. It is three hun- dred yards thick. The bottom or under surface, which appears to those wlio view it below, is one even regular plate of adamant, shooting up to the height of about two hundred yards. Abo\e it lie the several minerals in their usual order, and over all is a coat of rich mould, ten or twelve feet deep. The declivity of the upper surface, from the circumference to the centre, is the natural cause why all the dews and rains which fall upon the island are con- veyed in small rivulets towards the middle, where they are emptied into four large basins, each of about half a 300 Gulliver's travels: niil(5 in circuit, and two hundred yards distant from the ceiitrc. From these basins the water is continually ex- haled by the sun in the daytime, which effectually pre- vents their overflowing. Besides, as it is in the jwwer of the monarch to raise the island above tlie region of clouds and vapors, he can prevent the falling of dews and rain ^\'henever he pleases. For the highest clouds cannot rise above two miles, as naturalists agree; at least they were never known to do so in tiiat country. At the centre of the island there is a chasm about fifty yards in diameter, whence the astronomers descend into a large dome, which is therefore called flandona gagnole, or the astronomer's cave, situated at the depth of a hundred yards beneath the upper surface of the adamant. In this cave are twenty lamps, continually burning, which, from the reflection of the adamant, cast a strong light into everj- part. The place is stored with great variety of sextants, quadrants, telescopes, astrolabes, and other astronomical instruments. But the greatest curiosity, upon which the fate of the island depends, is a loadstone of a prodigious size, in shape resembling a weaver's shuttle. It is in length six yards, and in the thickest part at least three yards over. This magnet is sustained by a very strong axle of adamant passing through its middle, upon which it plays, and is poised so exactly that the weakest hand can turn it. It is hooped round with a hollow cylinder of adamant, four feet deep, as many thick, and twelve yards in diameter, placed horizontally, and supported by eight adamantine feet, each six yards high. In the middle of the concave side there is a groove twelve inches deep, in which the extremities of the axle are lodged, and turned round as there is occasion. The stone cannot be moved from its place by any force, because the hoop and its feet are one continued piece with A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 301 that body of adamant which constitutes the bottom of the ii?land. By means of this loadstone, the island is made to rise and fall, and move from one place to another. For, with respect to that part of the earth over which the monarch presides, the stone is endued at one of its sides with an attractive power, and at the other with a repulsive. Upon placing the magnet erect, with its attracting end towards the earth, the island descends; but when the repelling ex- tremity points downwards, the island mounts directly up- wards. When the position of the stone is oblique, the motion of the island is so too : for, in this magnet, the forces always act in lines parallel to its direction. By this oblique motion the island is conveyed to dif- ferent parts of the monarch's dominions. To explain the manner of its progress, let A B represent a line drawn across the dominions of Balnibarbi, let the line c D repre- sent the loadstone, of which let D be the repelling end, and c the attracting end, the island being over C : let the stone be jilaced in position c d, with its repelling end downwards ; then the island will be driven upwards obliquely towards u. When it is arrived at D, let the stone be turned upon its axle, till its attracting end points towards e, and then the island will be carried obliquely towards e ; where, if the stone be again turned upon its axle till it stands in the position E F, with its repelling point downwards, the island will rise obliquely towards r, where, by directing the attracting end towards G, the island may be carried to u, and from g to ii, by turning the stone so as to make its repelling extremity point directly down- ward. And thus, by changing the situation of the stone, as often as there is occasion, the island is made to rise and fall by turns in an oblique direction, and by those alter- 302 aULLIVER'S TKAVEIiS: nate risings and fallings (the obliquity being not con- siderable) is conveyed from one part of the dominions to the other. But it must be observed, that this island cannot move beyond the extent of the dominions below, nor can it rise above the height of four miles. For which the astrono- mers (who have written large systems concerning the stone) assign the following reason : that the magnetic virtue does not extend beyond the distance of four miles, and that the mineral,, which acts upon the stone in the bowels of the earth, and in the sea about six leagues distant from the shore, is not diffused through the whole globe, but terminated with the limits of the king's domin- ions ; and it was easy, from the great advantage of such a superior situation, for a prince to bring under his obedi- ence whatever country lay within the attraction of that magnet. When the stone is put parallel to the plane of the hori- zon, the island stands still ; for in that case the extremities of it being at equal distance from the earth, act with equal force, the one in drawing downwards, the other in pushing upwards, and consequently no motion can ensue. This loadstone is under the care of certain astronomers, who, from time to time, give it such positions as the monarch directs. They spend the greatest part of their lives in observing the celestial bodies, which they do by the assistance of glasses, far excelling ours in goodness. For, although their largest telescopes do not exceed three feet, they magnify much more than those of a hundrcid with us, and show the stars with greater clearness. This advantage has enabled them to extend their discoveries much farther than our astronomers in Europe ; for they have made a catalogue of ten thousand fixed stars, whereas A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 803 the largest of ours do not contain above one-tb,ir(i|)ai-t of that number. The^JuiVA-IikeaU^ -discovered two lesser stars, or.«atel1ites, which revolve about Mars ; whereof the icfti'ermost is distant from the centre of the primary planet exactly three of his diameters, and the outermost, five: the former revolves in the space of ten hours, and the latter in twenty-one and a half; so that the squares of their periodical times are very near in the same proportion with the cubes of their distance, from the centre of Mars; which evidently shows them to be governed by the same law of gravitation that influences the other heavenly bodies. They have observed ninety-three different comets, and settled their periods with great exactness. If this be true (and they affirm it with great confidence), it is much to be wished that their observations were made public, whereby the theory of comets, which at present is very lame and de- fective, might be brought to the same perfection with other parts of astronomy. The king would be the most absolute prince in the uni- verse, if he could but prevail on a ministry to join with him ; but these, having their estates below on the conti- nent, and considering that the office of a favorite has a very uncertain tenure, would n^ver consent to the enslaving of their country. If any town should engage in rebellion or mutiny, fall into violent factions, or refuse to pay the usual tribute, the king has two methods of reducing them to obedience. The first and the mildest course is, by keeping the island hover- ing over such a town, and the lands about it, whereby he can deprive them of the benefit of the sun and the rain, and consequently afflict the. inhabitants with dearth and diseases ; and if the crime deserve it, they are at the same 304 GULLIVER'S travels: time pelted from above with great stones, against which they have no defence bat by- ci: single building, but a continuation of several houses on both sides of a * Sir Walter Scott justly observes that Swift has borrowed the no- tion of the Academy of Lagado from Kabelais's description of the court of Queen "Whim. Swift, in his account of the employments of the academicians at Lagado, has improved the humor of Eabelais's description of the occupations of the queen's courtiers, but he has not diminished the coarseness. A brief specimen will be suflEicient. " I saw a great number of the queen's officers, who made tlacka- moors -white as fast as hops, just rubbing their bellies with the bottom of a pannier. "Others with three couple of foxes in one yoke, ploughed a sandy shore, and did not lose their seed. . . . ' ' Others sheared asses, and thus got long fleece wool. . . . " Poor Paniirge fairly cast up his accounts and vomited, seeing an Arohasdarpenin, who laid a huge plenty of chamber lye to putrefy in horse-dung, mish-mashed with abundance of Christian sir-reverence. Pugh ! fie upon him ! nasty dog ! However, he told us, that with this sacred distillation he watered kings and princes, and made their sweet lives a fathom or two In length. ... " We saw a knot of others, about a baker's dozen in number, tip- pling under an arbor. They toped out of jolly bottomless cups, four sorts of cool, sparkling, delicious vine-tree syrup, which went down A VOYAdiE TO LAPtlTA, ETC. S15 street, which growing waste, was purchased and applied to that use. I was received very kindly by the warden, and went for many days to the academy. Every room has in it one or more projectors ; and I believe I could not be in fewer than five hundred rooms. The first man I saw was of a meagre aspect, with sooty hands and face, his hair and beard long, ragged, and singed in several places. His clothes, shirt, and skin, were all of the same color. He had been eight years upon a project for extracting sunbeams out of cucumbers, wliich were to be put in phials hermetically sealed, and let out to warm like mother's milk ; and healths and hampers flew about like light- ning. We were told that these true philosophers were fairly multi- plying the stars by drinking, till the seven were fourteen, as bra\«ny Hercules did with Atlas. " Others in a large grassplot exactly measured how far the fleas could go at a hop, a step, and a jump; and told us that this was ex- ceeding useful for the ruling of kingdoms, the conduct of armies, and the administration of commonwealths. And that Socrates, who first got philosophy out of heaven, and from Idling and trifling made it profitable and of moment, used to spend half his philosophizing time in measuring the leaps of fleas, as Aristophanes the Quintessential affirms. . . . " In a blind corner I met four more very hot at it, and ready to go to loggerheads. I asked what was the cause of this stir and ado, the mighty coil and pother they made. And I heard that for five live- long days these overwise roysterers had been at it ding-dong, disputing on three high, more than metaphysical propositions, promising them- selves mountains of gold by solving them. The first was concerning a he-ass's ^adow ; the second of the smoke of a lantern ; and the third of goat's hair, whether it were wool or no ? We heard that they did not think it a bit strange that two contradictions in mode, form, figure, and time, should be true. Though I'll warrant the sophists of Paris had rather be unchristened than own so much.' — Rabelais, book 5, chap. xxii. 316 Gulliver's tra'^els: the air in raw inclement summers. He told me, he did not doubt, that in eight years more, he should be able to supply the governor's gardens with sunshine, at a reason- able rate ; but he complained that his stock was low, and entreated me to give him something as an encouragement to ingenuity, especially since this had been a very dear sea- son for cucumbers. I made him a small present, for my lord had furnished me with money on purpose, because he knew their practice of begging from all who go to see them. I went into another chamber, but was ready to hasten back, being almost overcome with a horrible stink. My conductor pressed me forward, conjuring me in a whisper "to give no offence, which would be highly resented:" and therefore I durst not so much as stop my nose. The pro- jector of this cell was the most ancient student of the academy; his face and beard were of a pale yellow; his hands and clothes daubed over with filth. When I was presented to him, he gave me a close embrace ; a compli- ment I could well have excused. His employment, from Lis first coming into the acaderny, was an operation to re- duce human excrement to its original food, by separating the several parts, removing the tincture which it receives from the gall, making the odor exhale, and scumming off the saliva. He had a weekly allowance, from the society, of a vessel filled with human ordure, about the bigness of a Bristol barrel. I saw another at work to calcine ice into gunpowder ; who likewise showed me a treatise he had written concern- ing the malleability of fire, which he intended to publish.* * No powers of ridicule could exaggerate the absurdity of the projects for which companies were formed in 17?0, during the South Sea mania; and Swift's account of the Academy of Lagado is tame A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 317 There was a most ingenious architect, who had con- trived a new method for building houses, by beginning at the roof, and working downward, to the foundation ; which he justified to me, by the like practice of those two pru- dent insects, the bee and the spider. There was a man born blind, who had several appren- tices in his own condition: their employment was to mix colors for painters, which their master taught them to dis- tinguish by feeling and smelling. It was indeed my mis- fortiine to find them at that time not very perfect in their lessons, and the professor himself happened to be gen- erally mistaken. This artist is much encouraged and esteemed by the whole fraternity.* when compared with the authentic list of the hubbies of the day. Amongst them we find: "For building and rebuilding houses throughout all England (three millions)." "For encouraging the breed of horses, and improving church lands." " For erecting salt- pans in Holy Island (two millions)." "For furnishing funerals to any part of Great Britain." " For carrying on the royal fishery of Great Britain (ten millions)." " For insuring of horses (two mil- lions)." "For' a wheel for perpetual motion (one million)." "For drying malt by hot air " "For building of hospitals for bastard children." " For the transmutation of quicksilver into a malleable fine metal." " For buying andfitting out ships to suppress pirates." " For importing a number of large jack-asses from Spain." " For extracting silver from lead." But perhaps the most strange of all was "For an undertaking of great advantage which shall in due time be revealed." Each subscriber was to pay down two guineas, and hereafter to receive a share of one hundred, with a disclosure of the object; and so tempting was the offer, that one thousand of these subscriptions were paid the same morning, with which the pro- jector went off in the afternoon. A ballad, which has been added as an Appendix to the Voyage to Laputa.-hada considerable eff'ect in dispelling the national delusion. * Some philosophers of Swift's days maintained that the blind could be taught to distinguish colors by the touch, and quoted the 318 auLLiVEK's travels: In another apartment, I was liighly pleased with a pro- jector who had found a device of ploughing the ground with hogs, to save the charges of ploughs, cattle, and labor. The method is this: in an acre of ground, you bury, at six inches distance and eight deep, a quantity of acorns, dates, chestnuts, and other mast or vegetables, whereof these animals are fondest; then you drive six hundred or more of them into the field, where, in a few days, they will root up the whole ground in search of their feed, and make it fit for sowing, at the same time manuring it with their dung: it is true, upon experiment, they found the charge and trouble very great, and they had little or no crop. However, it is not doubted, that this invention may be capable of great improvement. I went into another room, where the walls and ceiling were all hung round with cobwebs, except a narrow pas- sage for the artist to go in and out. At my entrance, he called aloud to me, "not to disturb his webs." He lamented "the fatal mistake the world had been so long in, of using silkworms, while he had such plenty of do- mestic insects who infinitely excelled the former, because they understood how to weave, as well as spin." And he example of a. blind Danish sculptor, mentioned by Bartolin, who distinguished all kinds of wood, and all the colors, merely by feel- ing. Indeed, there are few sciences in which the hlind have not distinguished themselves. The case of Professor Sanderson, at Cam- bridge, is well known. His attainments in the languages, and still more in mathematics, in philosophy, and in music, were truly aston- ishing. His sense of touch was so acute that he distinguished spuri- ous coins merely by letting them pass through his fingers, though they were so well executed that even skilful judges were deceived by them. It is probable that a project to provide employment for the blind was issued among the bubbles of 1720, though it is not fgynd in any of the list?, A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA. ETC. 319 proposed farther, " that by employing spiders, the charge of dyeing sillis should be wholly saved ;" whereof I was fully convinced, when he showed me a vast number of flies most beautifully colored, wherewith he fed his spiders, as- suring us "that the webs would take a tincture from them; and as he had them of all hues, he hoped to fit everybody's fancy, as soon as he could find proper food for the flies, of certain gums, oils, and other glutinous matter, to give a strength and consistence to the threads.* * This is not a caricature, but an unexiiggerated statement of a project seriously proposed by M. Bon, an ingenious Frenchman, who published a dissertation on the subject in the year 1710. He divided spider-threads into two kinds: "The first is weak, and only serves for that kind of web with which they catch flies. The second is much stronger, and is used as a covering for the eggs, both to shelter them from the cold, and preserve them from insects. These threads they wind very loosely round the eggs, resembling the balls or bags of silkworms that have been prepared and loosenedfor the distaff. The spider-bags are of a gray color when new ; but they turn blackish when long exposed to the air ; indeed one might find other spider-bags of different colors, and which would afford a better silk, but their scarcity would render the experiment diflicult ; for which reason it is better to use only the bags of the short-legged spiders, which are the most common kind. These always find out some place, secure from the wind and the rain, to make their bags, as hollow trees, thecorners of windows or vaults, or under the eaves of houses." To the disser- tation is appended a very interesting detail of M; Bon's experiments and their results, of which the following is a brief abstract. "Out of eight jjundred spiders which M. Bon kept, scarcely one died in a year, whereas of one hundred silkworms, not forty lived to make their bags." M. Bon having ordered all the short-legged spiders that could be found in the months of August and September to be brought to liim, shut them up in paper coffins and pots, covering the pots with paper, which he pricked full of pin-holes, as well as the coffins, to give them air. He fed them with flics, and found some time after- wards, that the greater part of them had made their bags. The same ingenious person found that spider's bags, with regard to their weight, ^ttorded much more silk than those of the silkworms : as a proof of 320 GULLIVER'S TRAVELS; \ There was an astronomer, who had undertaken to place a sun-dial upon the great weathercock on the town-house, by adjusting the annual and diurnal motions of the earth and sun, so as to answer and coincide with all accidental turnings of the wind.'J I was complaining of a small fit of the colic, upon which my conductor led me into a room where a great physician resided, who was famous for curing that disease, by con- trary operations from the same instrument. He had a large pair of bellows, with a long slender muzzle of ivory: this he conveyed eight inches up the anus, and drawing in the wind, he affirmed he could make the guts as lank as a dried bladder. But when the disease was more stubborn and violent, he let in the muzzle while the bellows were full of wind, which he discharged into the body of the which he obaerves, that thirteen ounces yield four ounces of clear silk, two ounces of which will make a pair of stockings ; whereas, stockings of common silk weigh seven or eight ounces. He found that the spider-silk readily took all kinds of dyes, and might be made into all kinds of stuffs. M. Bon had stockings and gloves made of it, some of which he presented to the Koyal Academy of Prance, and others to our Koyal Society. The Royal Academy of France ap- pointed the celebrated M. Reaumur to investigate this new silk-work, and his report is contained in the memoirs of the Academy for 1710. Reaumur showed that such a manufacture was by no means impossi- ble, but at the same time, demonstrated that the material would not be worth the trouble and expense of its preparation. It is a pity that Swift was not acquainted with the more ludicrous details of M. Bon's proposal. He asserted that spider-silk would yield by distillation, several specific medicines, particularly great quantities of spirit and volatile salts, which, being prepared after the same manner as that drawn from the bags of silkworms in making the Guitai Anglicance, or English drops, at one time so famous all over Europe, may serve to make other drops of greater efficacy, which M. Bon calls drops of Montpellier, and advises to be used in all lethargic or sleepy disorders. A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 321 patient; then withdrew the instrument to replenish it, clapping his thumb strongly against the orifice of the fundament ; and this being repeated three or four times, the adventitious wind would rush out, bringing the noxious along with it (like water put into a pump), and the patient recovered. I saw him try both experiments upon a dog, but could not discern any effect from the former. After the latter the animal was ready to burst, and made so violent a discharge as was very offensive to me and toy companion. The dog died on the spot^ and we left the doctor endeavor- ing to recover him, by the same operation.* I visited many other apartments, but shall not trouble my reader with all the curiosities I observed, being studious of brevity. I had hitherto seen only one side of the academy, the other being appropriated to the advancers of speculative learning, of whom I shall say something, when I have mentioned one illustrious person more, who is called among them " the universal artist." He told us " he had been thirty years employing his thoughts for the improvement of human life." He had two large rooms full of wonder- ful curiosities, and fifty men at work. Some were con- densing air into a dry tangible substance, by extracting the * The ridicule of this passage is directed against Dr. Woodward, who published a theory of vomition, founded on a scries of experi- ments he had tried with dogs. Woodward was rather severly at- tacked by Dr. Friend, who treated him as an ignorant empiric. Friend was a zealous Tory, and intimately connected with the. Bishop of Eochester ; tndei'd he was sent to the Tower, when the Habeas Corpus Act was suspended, on account of Layer's plot; Swift knew nothing of the merits of the discussion, but he was intimate with Friend, and disliked Woodwajrd ; Pope shared the same feelings, for in Martinus Scriblerus there is a very humorous parody of Woodward's Disserta- tion on an Ancient Shield. 21 322 GULLIVER'S TRAVELS: nitre, and letting the aqueous or fluid particles percolate; others softening marble, for pillows and pincushions ; others petrifying the hoofs of a living horse, to preserve them from foundering. The artist himself was at that time busy upon two great designs ; the first, to sow land with chaff, wherein he affirmed the true seminal virtue to be contained, as he demonstrated by several experiments, which I was not skilful enough to comprehend. The other was, by a cer- tain composition of gums, minerals, and vegetables, out- wardly applied to prevent the growth of wool upon two young lambs ; and he hoped, in a reasonable time, to propa- gate the breed of naked sheep all over the kingdom. We crossed a walk to the other part of the academy, where, as I have already said, the projectors in speculative learning resided. The first professor I saw, was in a very large room, with forty pupHs about him. After salutation, observing me to look earnestly upon a frame, which took up the greatest part of both the length and breadth of the room, he said, "Perhaps I might wonder to see him employed in a pro- ject for improving speculative knowledge, by practical and mechanical operations. But the world would soon be sen- sible to its usefulness ; and he flattered himself that a more \ noble, exalted thought never sprang into any other man's head. Every one knew how laborious the usual method is of attaining to arts and sciences ; whereas, by his contrivance, the most ignorant person, at a reasonable charge, and with a little bodily labor, might write books in philosophy, poetry, politics, laxss, mathematics, and theology, without the least assistance from genius or study." He then led me to the frame, about the sides whereof all Jjis pupils stood in ranks. It was twenty feet square, placed in the middle of the room. The superficies was composed of several bits A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 323 of wood, about the bigness of a die, but some larger than others. They were all linked together by slender wires. These bits of wood ^vere covered, on every square, with paper pasted on them : and on these papers were written all the words of their language, in their several moods, tenses, and declensions ; but without any order. The pro- fessor then desired «ie " to observe ; for he was ^oing to set his engine at work." The pupils, at his command, took each of them hold of an iron handle, whereof there were forty fixed round the edges of the frame ; and giving them a sudden turn, the whole disposition of the words was entirely changed. He then commanded six-and-thirty of the lads to read the several lines softly, as they appeared upon the frame ; and where they found three or four words together that might make part of a sentence, they dictated to the four remaining boys, who were scribes. This work was repeated three. or four times; and at every turn, the engine was so contrived, that the words shifted into new places, as the square bits of wood moved upside down.* * Raymond. Lully actually propounded a mechanical contrivance for the solution of all possible problems. And Cornelius Agrippa wrote a commentary upon the project, by means of which he de- clared that any man might be enabled with facility to discuss any subject, however abstruse and difficult. The machine was to consist of a certain number of concentric circles, some fixed and some mov- able: on the first were the subjects of propositions; on the second, absolute predicates; on the third, relative predicates; and on the others, formularies of questions. A system of triangles was applied for expressing conditions and limitations ; and Agrippa in his Com- mentaries gives some extraordinary specimens of results. Many emi- nent men, particularly Kircher and Kiihlman "advocated this mechani- cal contrivance, andaverred that they had brought it to a high degree of perfection. Those who have witnessed the operations of Babbage's calculating machine must confess, that so far as the relations of quantitj' are concerned, a mechanical contrivance has succeeded in solving prob- lems which would test the highest attainments of a mathematician. 324 gullivee's travels: Six hours a day the young studentH wore employed in this labor ; and the professor showed me several volumes in large folio, already collected, of broken sentences, which he intended to piece together, and out of those rich mate- rials, to give the world a complete body of all arts and sciences; which, however, might be still improved, and much expedited, if the public wouW raise a fund for making and employing five hundred su<'h frames in Lagado, and oblige the managers to contribute in com- mon their several collections. He assured me " that this invention had employed all his thoughts from his youth; that he had emptied the whole vocabulary into his frame, and made the strictest computation of the general proportion there is in books between the numbers of particles, nouns, and verbs, and other parts of speech." I made my humblest acknowledgment to this illustrious person for his great communicativeness; and promised, "if ever I had the good fortune to return to my native country, that I M'ould do him justice, as the sole inventor of this wonderful machine ;" the form and contrivance of which I desired leave to delineate on paper. I told him, " although it were the custom of our learned in Europe to steal inventions from each other, who had thereby at lefct this advantage, that it became a ci^ntroversy which was the right owner: yet I would take such caution, that he should have the honor entire, without a rival." We next went to tlie school of languages, where three professors sat in consultation upon improving that of their own country. The first project was to shorten discourse, by cutting poly- syllables into one, and leaving out verbs and participles; because, in reality, all things imaginable are but nouns. A VOYAflE TO LAfOTA, ETC. 325 The other project was a scheme for entirely abolishing all words whatsoever; and this was urged as a great ad- vantage in pcjiut of health as well as brevit)-. For it is plain, tiiat every word we speak is, in some degree, a diminution of our lungs by corrosion ; and consequently contributes to the shortening of our lives. An expedient was therefore offered, " that since words are only names for things, it would be more convenient for all men to carry about them such things as were necessary to express a particular business they are to discourse on." And this invention would certainly have taken place, to the great ease as well as health of the subject, if the women, in conjunction with the vulgar and illiterate, had not threat- ened to raise a rebellion unless they might be allowed the liberty to speak with their tongues after the manner of their forefathers ; such constant irreconcilable enemies to science are the common people. However, many of the most learned and wise adhere to the new scheme of ex- pressing themselves by tljings ; which has only this incon- venience attending it, that if a man's business be very great, and of various kinds, he must be obliged, in pro- portion, to carry a greater bundle of things upon his back, unless he can afford one or two strong servants to attend him. I have often beheld two of these sages almost sink- ing under the weight of their packs, like peddlers among us ; who, when they met in the street would lay down their loads, open their sacks, and hold conversation for an hour together ; then put up their implements, help each other to resume their burdens, and take their leave. But for short conversations, a man may carry imple- ments in his pockets, and under his arms, enough to supply him ; and in his house, he cannot be at a loss. Therefore the room where company meet who practice this art, is 326 full of all things, ready at hand, requisite to furnish matter for this kind of artificial converse. Another great advantage ])roposed by this invention was, that it would serve as a universal language, to be un- derstood in all civilized nations, whose goods and utensils are generally of the same kind, or nearly resembling, so that their uses might easily be comprehended. And thus ambassadors would be qualified to treat with foreign princes, or ministers of state, to whose tongues they were utter strangers. I was at the mathematical school, where the master taught his pupils after a method scarce imaginable to us in Europe. The proposition and demonstration were feirly written on a thin wafer, with ink composed of a cephalic tincture. This, the student was to swallow upon a fasting stomach, and for three days following eat nothing but bread and water. As the wafer digested, the tincture mounted to his brain, bearing the proposition along with it. But the success has not hitherto been answerable, partly by some error in the quantum or composition, and partly by the perverseness of lads, to whom this bolus is so nauseous, that they generally steal aside, and discharge it upwards, before it can operate; neither have they been yet persuaded to use so long an abstinence as the prescrip- tion requires. A VOYAGE iO LAPtTA, ETC. S27 CHAPTER VI. A FARTHER ACCOUNT OF THE ACADEMY — THE AUTHOR PROPOSES SOME IMPROVEMENTS, WHICH ARE HONORABLY RECEIVED, ■JUDGMENT does not seem to rule in the school of political projectors, where I was but ill entertained ; the professors appearing to me wholly out of their senses, which is a scene that never fails to make me melancholy. These unhappy peo- ple were proposing schemes for persuading monarchs to choose favorites upon the score of their wisdom, capacity, and virtue ; of teaching ministers to consult public good ; of rewarding merit, great abilities, and eminent services; of instructing princes to- know their true interest, by placing it on the same foundation with that of their peo- ple; of choosing for employments persons qualified to exercise them ; with many other wild impossible chimeras, that never entered before into the heart of man to con- ceive; and confirmed in me the old observation, "that there is nothing so extravagant and irrational, which some philosophers have not maintained for truth." But, however, I shall so far do justice to this part of the academy, as to acknowledge that all of them were not so visionarj'. There was a most ingenious doctor, who seemed to be perfectly versed in the whole nature and system of government. This illustrious person had very usefully employed his studies; in finding out effectual remedies for all diseases and corruptions, to which the several kinds of 328 GULLIVER'S travels; public administration are subject, by the viocs or infirmi- ties of those who govern, as well as by the licentiousness of those who are to obey. For instance ; whereas all writers and reasoners have agreed, that there is a strict universal resemblance between the natural and the political body; can there be anything more evident, than that the health of both must be preserved, and the diseases cured, by the same prescriptions ? It is allowed, that senates and great councils are often troubled with redundant, ebullient, and other peccant humors ; with many diseases of the head, and more of the heart; with strong convulsions, with grievous contractions of the nerves and sinews in both hands, but especially the right ; with spleen, flatus, verti- goes, and deliriums ; with scrofulous tumors, full of fetid purulent matter ; with sour frothy eructations ; with can- ine appetites, and crudeness of digestion, besides many others, needless to mention. This doctor therefore pro- posed, " that upon the meeting of the senate, certain ph)'- sicians should attend at the three first days of their sit- ting, and at the close of each day's debate feel the pulses of every senator ; after which, having maturely considered and consulted upon the nature of the several maladies, and the methods of cure, they should on tlie fourth day return to the senate-house, attended by their apothecaries stored .with proper medicines; and before the members sat, ad- minister to each of them lenitives, aperitives, abstersives, corrosives, restringents, palliatives, laxatives, cephalalgics, icterics, apophlegmatics, acoustics, as their several cases required ; and, according as these medicines should operate, repeat, alter, or omit them, at the next meeting." This project could not be of any great expense to the public ; and might, in my poor opinion, be of much use for the dispatch of business, in those countries where senates A Voyage to laputa, etc. 329 r have any share in the legislative power; begef unanimity, Bhorten debates, open a few mouths which are now closed, and close many more which are now open ; curb the petu- lancy of the young, and correct the positiveness of the old ; rouse the stupid, and damp the pert. Again : because it is a general complaint, that the favor- ites of princes are troubled with short and weak memories ; the saaie doctor proposed, "that whoever attended a first minister, after having told his business, with the utmost brevity and in the plainest words, should, at his departure, give the said minister a tweak by the nose, or a kick on the belly, or tread on his corns, or lug him thrice by both ears, or run a pin into his breech, or pinch his arm black and blue, to prevent forgetfulness ; and at every levee-day, re- peat the same operation, till the business were done, or absolutely refused." He likewise directed, " that every senator in the great council of a nation, after he had delivered his opinion and argued in the defence of it, should be obliged to give his vote directly contrary ; because if that were done, the re- sult would infallibly terminate in the good of the public." When parties in a state are violent, he offered a wonder- ful contrivance to reconcile them. The method is this: you take a hundred leaders of each party ; you dispose them into couples of such whose heads are nearest of a size ; then let two nice operators saw off the occiput of each couple at the same time, in such a manner, that the brain may be equally divided. Let the occiputs, thus cut off, be interchanged, applying each to tiie head of his opposite partyman. It seems indeed to be a work that requires some exactness, but the professor assured us, "that if it were dexterously performed, the cure would be infallible." For he argued thus : " that the two half brains being left 330 GULLIVER 's travels: to debate the matter between themselves witliin the space of one skull, would soon come to a good understanding ; and produce that moderation, as well as regularity of think- ing, so much to be wished for in the heads of those wlio imagine they come into the world only to watch and govern its motion ; and as to the difference of brains, in quantity or quality, among those who are directors in faction," the doctor assured us, from his own knowledge, " that it was a perfect trifle." I heard a very warm debate between two professoi-s, about the most commodious and effectual ways and means of raising money, without grieving the subject. The first affirmed, "the justest method would be to lay a certain tax upon vices and folly; and the sum fixed upon every man to be rated, after the fairest manner, by a jury of his neigh- bors." The second was of an opinion directly contrary ; "to tax those qualities of body and mind for which men chiefly value themselves ; the rate to be more or less, ac- cording to the degrees of excelling ; the decision whereof should be left entirely to their own breast." The highest tax was upon men who are the greatest favorites of the other sex, and the assessments, according to the number and nature of the favors they have received ; for which, they are allowed to be their own vouchers. Wit, valor, and politeness, were likewise proposed to be largely taxed, and collected in the same manner, by every person's giving his own word for the quantum of what he possessed. But as to honor, justice, wisdom, and learning, they should not be taxed at all; because they are qualifications of so sin- gular a kind, that no man will either allow them in his neighbor or value them in himself. The women were proposed to be taxed according to their beauty and skill in dressing, wherein they had the same A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 331 privilege with the men, to be determined by their own judgment. But constancy, chastity, good sense, and good nature-, were not rated, because they would not bear tiie charge of collecting. To keep senators in the interest of the crown, it was pro- posed that the members shall raffle for employments ; every man first taking an oath, and giving security, that he would vote for the court, whether he won or not : after which, the losers had, in their turn, the liberty of raffling upon the next vacancy. Thus, hope and expectation would be kept alive : none would complain of broken promises, but im- pute their disappointments wholly to fortune, whose shoul- ders are broader and stronger than those of a ministry. Another professor showed me a large paper of instruc- tions for discovering plots and conspiracies against the gov- ernment.* He advised great statesmen to examine into the diet of all suspected persons; their times of eating; upon which side they lay in bed ; with which hand they wiped their posteriors : take a strict view of their excre- ments, and from the color, the odor, the taste, the consis- tence, the crudeness, or maturity of digestion, form a judg- ment of their thoughts and designs; because men are never so serious, thoughtful, and intent, as when they are at stool, which he found by experience ; for, in such conjunctures, when he used, merely as a trial, to consider which was the best way of murdering the king, his ordure would have a tincture of green : but quite different when he thought only of raising an insurrection, or burning the metropolis.f * rrom this to the end of the chapter, the proceedings on the Bill of Attainder against the Bishop of Koehester are bitterly ridiculed. f The following extract from the Duke of Wharton's speech on the second reading of t'he Bill of Attainder, will sufficiently explain this ■Xarse allusion. " The next point which was attempted to be proved, B&2 GULLIVER'S travels: The whole discourse was written with great acuteness, containing many observations, both curious and useful for politicians; but, as I conceived, not altogether complete. This I ventured to tell the author, and ofiFered, if he pleased, to supply him with some additions. He received my prop- osition with more compliance than is usual among writers, especially those of the projecting species ; professing, " he would be glad to receive farther information." I told him, " that in the kingdom of Tribnia,* by the natives called Langden,t where I had sojourned some time in my travels, the bulk of the people consist in a manner wholly of discoverers, Vitnesses, informers, accusers, prose- cutors, evidences, swearers, together with their several sub- servient and subaltern instruments, .all under the colors, the conduct, and the pay of ministers of state, and their deputies.! The plots, in that kingdom, are usually the was, that Captain Halstead went to fetch the late I)uke of Ormond, and was at the deanery with the bishop before he embarked ; there are also two letters, found in the bishop's close stool, from this gentleman, which were read, but are only appointments for visits, and mention nothing of this design." * Britain. f london. X The cliarge against -the Bishop of Rochester was supported by circumstantial evidence derived from a long and tangled series of in- tercepted correspondence and deciphered letters. The Duke of Whar- ton has given in his speech a very able summary of the arguments urged by the bishop and his friends against this line of evidence. " My lords, it very well deserves your lordships' consideration, how far this kind of evidence is to be admitted. It has appeared to your lordships, by the oath of Mr. Willes himself (the decipherer em- ployed by the government), that it is an art which depends upon con- jecture, for this gentleman has confessed, that ever}' man is liable to a mistake in this as well as in other sciences ; he tells you that he and his brother decipherers varied in one or two instances. He allows that the chasms which they were forced to leave in those letters, might alter the sense of them. And therefore, I cannot but think that an A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 333 workmanship of those persons who desire to raise their own characters of profound politicians ; to j-estore new vigor to a crazy administration ;* to stifle or divert general discon- tents ; to fill their coffers with forfeitures ; and raise or sink the opinion of public credi^t, as either shall best answer their private advantage.f It is first agreed and settled among them, what suspected persons shall be accused of a plot ; then, effectual care is taken to secure all their letters and papers, and put the owners in chains. These papers are delivered to a set of artists, very dexterous in finding out the mysterious meanings of words, syllables, and letters. " For instance, they can discover a close-stool, to signify accusation, grounded on such proofs, is uncertain and precarious. . . The person who is the decipherer is not to be confuted, and what he Bays must be taken for granted, because the key cannot be produced with safety to the public ; and consequently, if his conjectures be ad- mitted as evidence, our lives and fortunes must depend on the skill and honesty of the decipherers, who may with safety impose on the legislature, when there are not means of contradicting them for want of seeing their key." A large section of the Whigs had separated from Walpole about this time, and hence the Tories had plausible grounds for accusing the minister of forging a Jacobite plot in order to confound his enemies and strengthen himself. * The failure of the South Sea Scheme, a little before the discovery of the plot, had given a serious shock to public credit. ■f- Atterbury, on the accession of George I, received evident marks of coldness from the new sovereign ; and on the breaking out of the rebellion in 1715, he rather ostentatiously exhibited his disaffection to the House of Brunswick by refusing to sign the declaration of the bishops in favor of the crown. He was consequently an object of suspicion long before the plot was discovered, and when first arrested, probably believed that Walpole was acting merely on conjecture. But we now know, from Sir Luke Schaah's correspondence, that the conspiracy was revealed to Walpole by the regent Duke of Orleans, to whom the agents of the Pretender communicated the plot in the hope of obtaining assistance. 334 GULLIVER'S TKAVELS: a privy-council ; a flock of geese, a senate ; a lame dog,* an invader; the plague, a standing army ; a beetle, a prime * The whimsical circumstances of a lame dog having furnished the most conclusive proof against Atterbury was naturally the theme of much ridicule. " The case was as follows : there was no doubt that certain intercepted letters to and from Jones and Illington were of a treasonable nature; the point was to prove that these names were designed for the bishop. Now it so happened tfiat Mrs. Atterbury, who died early this year, had a little before received a present from Lord Mar, in Prance, of a sniall spotted dog, called Harlequin ; and this animal having broken its leg, and being left with one Mrs. Barnes to be cured, was more than once mentioned in the correspond- ence of Jones and Illington. Mrs. Barnes and some other persons were examined before the council on this subject, and they, supposing that at all events there could be no treason in a lapdog, readily owned that Harlequin was intended as a present for the Bishop of Rochester. There were many other collateral proofs ; but it was the throwing up of this littln straw which decided from what quarter blew the wind." — Lord Mahon's History of England, ii, 56. The incident is thus noticed in the Report of the Committee of the House of Commons. "Some letters have been intercepted, which there is good reason to believe were from the Bishop of Rochester; and one of these letters being signed T. Jonos, and another T. Illing- ton, your Committee will now lay before the House the evidence they have found of the bishop's being designed by those two names, col- lected from circumstances, which being in themselves seemingly minute, and of little consequence, were for this reason more frankly confessed by those who were obstinate in concealing stronger proofs, and yet at the same time lead directly to the discovery of the person meant by those names. Mrs. Barnes being examined before a Com- mittee of Lords of the Council, obstinately refused to make the least discovery relating to George Kelly ; but when she came to be asked what she knew about a dog sent over to Kelly from France, not sus- pecting that this would lead to any discovery, she readily owned that a spotted little dog called Harlequin, which was brought from Prance, and had a leg broken, was left with her by Mr. Kelly to be cured ; that the said dog was not for her, but for the Bishop of Rochester; and that Kelly promised to get the dog for her from the Bishop of Rochester, in case it did not recover of its lameness. . . . But it A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC 335 minister ; the gout, a high-priest ; a gibbet, a secretary of state ; a chamber-pot, a committee of grandees ; a sieve, a court lady ; a broom, a revolution ; a mouse-traiJ, an em- ployment; a bottomless pit, a treasury ; a sink, a court; a cap and bells, a favorite a broken reed, a court of justice ; an empty tun, a general; a running sore, the administra- tion. " When this method fails, they have two others more effectual, wnicn the learned among tlieni call acrostics and anagrams. First, they can decipher all initial letters into political meanings. Thus, N shall signify a plot ; B, a regiment of horse ; L, a fleet at sea,; or, secondly, by transposing the letters of the alphabet in any suspected paper, they can lay open the deepest designs of a discon- tented party. So, for example, if I should say iri^a letter to a friend, ' Our brother Tom has just^got the piles,' a skilful decipherer would discover, that the same letters which compose that sentence may be analyzed into the following words, ' Resist, a plot is brought home, the tour.' And this is the anagraramatic method."* appears to your Committee, by letters intercepted between Kelly and his correspondents in France, that a dog so named and hurt was sent over to Kelly from Prance, to be delivered as a present to the person denoted by the names of Jones and Illington." Swift could not resist this tempting opportunity of engaging in party warfare, from which he had now for nine years held aloof: he poured forth one of his happiest strains of satire on " the horrid con- spiracy" discovered by a French dog, " who confessed as plain as he could barl^." The poem is too long for insertion here, and it is there- fore put in the Appendix to this Voyage. * This humorous burlesque on the Keport of the House of Com- mons seems particularly aimed at the following passage: " From the time of George Kelly's being first taken up, the Bishop of Rochester is denoted by the names Rig and Weston, as will appear from the following circumstances. On the 30th of August, Kelly writes to 336 auLLivER's travels: The professor made me great acknowledgments for com- municating these observations, and promised to make hon- orable mention of me in his treatise. I saw nothing in this country that could invite me to a longer continuance, and began to think of returning home to England. Dillon a long letter, which contains the particulars of the bishop's being taken into custody, examined, and committed. On the 14th of September, Dillon's secretary writes to Kelly, ' that his letter on the 30th of August came safe, and that the particulars he gave of Mr. Rig's case were very acceptable to Mr. Dillon, whose concern for a true and worthy friend and relation cannot be doubted, and a longing desire to know her entirely clear of her distemper.' . . . In the same letter he desires to know what is become of Caste. . . . That Eig de- notes the bishop is further confirmed by these particulars. Kelly, in his first letter after his enlargement, writes word to Jerrard, ' all I can do now will be to deliver to your cousin Kig any goods that you can send by private hand : he is determined not to receive them in any other way, and indeed I cannot say he is in the wrong. How far this late affair may affect him, I cannot tell.' Now since it ap- pears that Kelly was formerly employed in conveying letters to and from the bishop (which are often called goods in the intercepted cor- respondence), since the bishop himself has desired in his letter to Dillon, that no more letters of consequence be intrusted to the post, and since Kelly's examination about the dog could affect no one but the bishop, it may justly be concluded that Eig and the bishop are the same." .... The identification of Weston with the bishop is made out by a similar combination of minute circumstances. A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 337 CHAPTER VII. THE AUTHOR LEAVB8 LAGADO — ARRIVES AT MALDONADA — NO SHIP READY — HE TAKES A SHORT VOYAGE TO GUTBBDUBDRIB — HIS RBCEPTIOlf BY THE GOVERNOR. APUTA and its dependencies form part of the continent, which extends itself, as I have reason to believe, eastward, to that unknown tract of America, westward of ' California ; and north, to the Pacific Ocean, which is not above^a hundred and fifty miles from Lagado ; where there is a good port, and much commerce with the great island of Luggnagg, situ- ated to the northwest about 29 degrees north latitude, and 140 longitude. This island of Luggnagg stands south- eastward of Japan, about a hundred leagues distant. There is a strict alliance between the Japanese emperor and the king of Luggnagg ; which affords frequent opportunities of sailing from one island to the other. I determined there- fore to direct my course this way, in order to my return to Europe. I hired two mules, with a guide to show me the way, and carry my smal 1 baggage. I took leave of my noble protector, who had shown me so much favor, and made me a generous present at my departure. My journey was without any accident or adventure worth relating. When I arrived at the port of Maldonada (for so it is called) there was no ship in the harbor bound for Luggnagg, nor likely to be in some time. The town is about as large as Portsmouth. I soon fell into 22 338 auiiLiVBR's travels: some acquaintance, and was very hospitably received. A gentleman of distinction said to me, " that since the ships bound for Luggpagg could not be ready in less than a month, it might be no disagreeable amusement for me to take a trip to the little island of Glubbdubdrib, about five leagues off to the southwest." He offered himself and a friend to accompany me, and that I should be provided with a small convenient bark for the voyage. Glubbdubdrib, as nearly as I can interpret the word, signifies the island of sorcerers or magicians. It is about one-third as large as the Isle of Wight, and extremely fruitful : it is governed by the head of a certain tribe, who are all magicians. This tribe marries only among each other, and the eldest in succession is prince or gov- ernor. He has a noble palace, and a park of about three thousand acres, surrounded by a wall of hewn stone twenty feet high. In this park are several small inclosures for cattle, corn, and gardening. The governor and his family are served and attended by domestics of a kind somewhat unusual. By his skill in necromancy, he has a power of calling whom he pleases from the dead, and commanding their service for twenty- four hours, but no longer ; nor can he call the same per- sons up again in less than three months, except upon very extraordinary occasions. When we arrived at the island, which was about eleven in the morning, one of the gentlemen who accompanied me went to the governor and desired admittance for a stranger, who came on purpose to have the honor of attending on his Highness. This was immediately granted, and we all three entered the gate of the palace between two rows of guards, armed and dressed after a very antic manner, and something in their countenances that made my flesh creep A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 339 with a horror that I cannot express. We passed through several apartments, between servants of tlie same sort, ranked on each side as before, till we came to the chamber of presence ; where, after three profound obeisances and a few general questions, we were permitted to sit on three stools, near the lowest step of his Highness's throne. He understood the language of Balhibarbi, although it were different from that of this island. He desired me to- give him some account of ray travels ; and, to let me see that I should be treated without ceremony, he dismissed all his attendants with a turn of his finger; at which, to my great astonishment, they vanished in an instant, like visions in a dream when we awake on a sudden. I could not recover myself in some time, till the governor assured me, "that I should receive no hurt:" and observing my two compan- ions to be under no concern, who had been often enter- tained in tlie same manner, I began to take courage, and related to his Highness a short history of my several ad- ventures, yet not without some hesitation, and frequently looking behind me to the place where I had seen tliose do- mestic spectres. I had the honor to dine with the gov- ernor, where a new set of ghosts served up the meat, and waited at table. I now observed myself to be less terrified than I had been in the morning. I stayed till sunset, but humbly desired his Highness to excuse me for not accept- ing his invitation of lodging in the palace. My two friends and I lay at a private house in the town adjoining, which is the capital of this little island ; and the next morning we returned to pay our duty to the governor, as he was pleased to command us. After this manner we continued in the island for ten days, most part of every day with the governor, and at night in our lodging. I soon grew so familiarized to the 340 GULLIVER'S travels: sight of spirits, that after the third or fourth time they gave me no emotion at all ; or, if I had any apprehensions left, my curiosity prevailed over them. For his Highness the governor ordered me " to call up whatever persons I would choose to name, and in whatever numbers, among all the dead from the beginning of the world to the present time, and command them to answer any questions I should think fit to ask ; with this condition, that my questions must be confined within the compass of the times they lived in. And one thing I might depend upon, that they would cer- tainly tell me the truth, for lying was a talent of no use in the lower world." I made my humble acknowledgments to his Highness for so great a favor. We were in a chamber from whence there was a fair prospect into the park. And because my first inclination was to be entertained with scenes of pomp and magnificence, I desired to see Alexander the Great at the head of his army, just after the battle of Arbela : which, upon a motion of the governor's finger, immediately ap- l)eared in a large field, under the window where we stood. Alexander was called up into the room; it was with great diiBculty that I understood his Greek,* and had but little of my own. He assured me upon his honor " that he was not poisoned, but died of a bad fever, by excessive drink- ing."t * A hint from Gulliver that we have lost the true Greek idiom. — Orrery. f In this passage there is a peculiar beauty, though it is not dis- covered at a hasty view. The appearance of Alexander with a vic- torious army immediately after the battle of Arbela, produces only a declaration that ho died by drunkenness : thus inadequate and ridicu- lous in the eye of reason is the ultimate purpose for which Alexander with his army marched into a remote country, subverted a mighty A VOVASE TO LAPOTA, ETC. 341 Next, I saw Hannibal passing the Alps, who told me " he had not a di"op of vinegar in his camp." * I saw Csesar and Pompey at the head of their troops, just ready to engage. I saw the former, in his last great triumph. I desired that the senate of Rome might appear before me, in one large chamber, and a modern representa- tive in countorview, in another. Tlie first seemed to be an assembly of heroes and demigods; the other, a knot of peddlers, pickpockets, highwaymen, and bullies. The governor, at my request, gave the sign for Csesar and Brutus to advance towards us. I was struck with a profound veneration at the sight of Brutus, and could easily discover the most consummate virtue, the greatest intrepidity and firmness of mind, the truest love of his country, and general benevolence of mankind, in every lineament of his countenance. I observed, with much pleasure, that these two persons were in good intelligence with each other ; and Csesar freely confessed to me, " that the greatest actions of his life were not equal, by many degrees, to the glory of taking it away," I had the honor to have much conversation with Brutus; and was told, empire, and deluged a nation with blood : he gained no more than an epithet to his name, which, after a few repetitions, was no longer re- gardsd, even by himself. Thus the purpose of his resurrection ap- pears to be at least equally important with that of his life, upon which it is a satire not more bitter than ju^. — Hawkesworth. * Livy, the Roman historian, has related that Hannibal burnt a great pile of wood upon a rock that stopped his passage, and when it was thus hpated poured vinegar upon it, by which It was made so soft as to be easily cut through. — Hawkesworth. The story has been generally doubted by modern writers, since it was hardly possible that Hannibal could have had along with his army a sufficient quantity of vinegar to make the experiment, and since it is certain, the experiment, if made, could not have succeeded to any useful extent. 342 Gulliver's travels: "that his ancestor Junius, Socrates, Epaminondas, Cato tlie Younger,* Sir Thomas More, and himself, were per- petually together;" a sextumvirate, to which all the ages of the world cannot add a seventh. It would be tedious to trouble the reader with relating what vast numbers of illustrious persons were called up, to gratify that insatiable desire I had to see the world in every period of antiquity placed before me. I chiefly fed mine eyes with beholding the destroyers of tyrants and usurpers, and the restorers of liberty to oppressed and in- jured nations. But it is impossible to express the satis- faction I received in my own mind, after such a manner, as to make it a suitable entertainment to the reader. * I am in some doubt whether Cato the censor can fairly claim a rank among so choice a group of ghosts. — Orrery. This note of his lordship is an encomium on the judgment of our author, who knew that Cato the censor and Cato the younger were different persons, and fer good reason preferred the latter. — Hawkesworth. A VOYAGE TO LAttJTA, ETC. •343 CHAPTER YIII. A TARTHKR ACCOUNT OP QLTJBEDTJBDRIB — ANCIENT AND MODERN HISTORY CORRECTED. ESIEiOUS to see those ancients who were most renowned for wit and learning, I set apart one day on purpose. I proposed that Homer and Aristotle might appear at the head of all their commentators; but these were so numerous, that some hundreds were forced to attend in the court and outward rooms of the palace. I knew, and could distinguish those two heroes, at first sight, not only from the crowd, but from each other. Homer was the taller and comelier per- son of the two, walked very erect for one of his age, and his eyes were the most quick and piercing I ever beheld. Aristotle stooped much, and made use of a staff. His visage was meagre, his hair lank and thin, and his voice hollow.* I soon discovered that both of them were per- fect strangers to the rest of the company, and had never * This description of Aristotle is fine, and in a few words repre- sents the true nature of his works. By not having the immortal spirit of Homer, he was unable to keep his body erect, and his staff, which feebly supported him, like his commentators, made this defect more conspicuous. He wanted not some useful qualities, but these real ornaments, like his hair, were thin and ungraceful — Orrery. In this the noble commentator seems to be mistaken, for it cannot be believed that Aristotle's real ornaments, however few, were ungraee- fuL — Hawkeaworth. 344- auLLiVER's travels: seen or heard of them before : and I had a whisper from a ghost who shall be nameless, " that these commentators always kept in the most distant quarters from their prin- cipals, in the lower world, through a consciousness of shame and guilt, because they had so horribly misrepre- sented the meaning of those authors to posterity." I in- troduced Didymus and Eustathius to Homer, and pre- vailed on him to treat them better than perhaps they de- served, for he soon found they wanted a genius to enter into the spirit of a poet. But Aristotle was out of all patience with the account I gave him of Seotus and Eamiis, as I presented them to him ; and he asked them, " whether the rest of the tribe were as great dunces as themselves." I then desired the governor to call up Descartes and Gassendi, with whom I prevailed to explain their systems to Aristotle. Tliis great philosopher freely acknowledged his own mistakes in natural philosophy, because- he pro- ceeded in many things upon conjecture, as all men must do ; and he found that Gassendi, who had made the doc- trine of Epicurus as palatable as he could, and the vor- tices of Descartes, were equally to be exploded. He pre- dicted the same fate to attraction, whereof the present learned are such zealous assertors.* He said, "that new systems of nature were but new fashions, which would vary in every age; and even those who pretend t> demonstrate them from mathematical principles, would flourish but a short period of time, and be out of vogue when that was determined." * Swift here manifestly shows his ignorance of Sir Isaac Newton's philosophy, which is founded not on conjecture, lilie the theories of Gassendi and Descartes, but is a legitimate induction from ascertained facts. A VOYAQK TO LAPUTA, ETC. 345 I spent five days in conversing with many others of the ancient learned. I saw most of the first Roman emperors. I prevailed on the governor to call up Heliogabalus's cooks to dress us a dinner, but they could not show us much of their skill, for want of materials. A helot of Agesilaus made us a dish of Spartan broth, but I was not able to get down a second spoonful. The two gentlemen who conducted me to the island, were pressed by their private affairs to return in three days, which I employed in seeing some of the modern dead, who had made the greatest figure, for two or three hundred years past, in our own and other countries of Europe : and haying been always a great admirer of old illustrious families, I desired the governor would call up a dozen or two of kings, with their ancestors in order, for eight or nine generations. But my disappointment was grievous and unexpected. For, instead of a long train with royal diadems, I saw in one family two fiddlers, three spruce courtiers, and an Italian prelate. In another, a barber, an abbot, and two cardinals. I have too great a veneration for crowned heads to dwell any longer on so nice a subject. But as to counts, marquises, dukes, earls, and the like, I was not so scrupulous. And I confess it was not without some pleasure, that I found myself able to trace the par- ticular features, by which certain families are distinguished, up to their originals. I could plainly discover whence one family derives a long chin ; why a second has abounded with knaves for two generations, and fools for two more; why a third happened to be crackbrained, and a fourth to be sharpers : whence it came, what Polydore Virgil says of a certain great house. Nee vir fortis, nee fcemiiM casta; how cruelty, falsehood, and cowardice, grew to be characteristics, by which certain families are distinguished as much as by 346 auLLivEu's travels; their coats of" arms ; who first brought the pox into a noble liouse, which has lineally descended in scrofulous tumors to their posterity. Neither could I wonder at all this, when I saw such an interruption of lineages, by pages, lackeys, valets, coachmen, gamesters, fiddlers, players, cap- tains, and pickpockets. I was chiefly disgusted with modern history. For having strictly examined all the persons of greatest name in the courts of princes, for a hundred years past, I found how the world had been misled by prostitute writers, to ascribe the greatest exploits in war, to cowards; the wisest counsel, to fools ; sincerity, to flatterers ; Roman virtue, to betrayers of their country ; piety, to atheists ; chastity, to sodomites ; truth, to informers : how many innocent and excellent persons had been condemned to death or banish- ment, by the practicing of great ministers upon the corrup- tion of judges, and the malice of factions : how many vil- lains had been exalted to the highest places of trust, power, dignity, and profit : how great a share in the motions and events of courts, councils, and senates, might be challenged by bawds, whores, pimps, parasites, and buffoons. How low an opinion I had of human wisdom and integrity, when I was truly informed of the springs and motives of great enterprises and revolutions in the world, and of the contemptible accidents to which they owed their success ! Here I discovered the roguery and ignorance of those who pretend to write anecdotes, or secret history ; who send so many kings to their graves with a cup of poison ; will repeat the discourse between a prince and chief minister, where no witness was by ; unlock the thoughts and cabi- nets of ambassadors and secretaries of state ; and have the perpetual misfortune to bo mistaken. Here I discovered the true causes of many great events that have surprised A Voyage to laputa, etc. 34t the world ; how a whore can govern the back stairs, the back stairs a council, and the council a senate. A general confessed, in my presence, " that he got a victory purely by the force of cowardice and ill-conduct;"* and an ad- miral, " that, for want of proper intelligence, he beat the enemy, to whom he intended to betray the fleet."t Three kings protested to me, that in their whole reigns they never did once prefer any person of merit, unless by mistake, or treachery of some minister in whom they confided : neither would they do it if they were to live again ; and they showed, with great strength of reason, " that the royal throne could not be supported without corruption, because that positive, confident, restive temper, which virtue infused into a man, was a perpetual clog to public business."| I had the curiosity to inquire in a particular manner, by what method great numbers had procured to themselves high titles of honor, and prodigious estates ; and I confined my inquiry to a very modern period ; however, without grating upon present times, because I would be sure to give no offence even to foreigners ; for I hope the reader need not to be told, that I do not in the least intend my own country, in what I say upon this occasion. A great num- ber of persons concerned were called up ; and, upon a very slight examination, discovered such a scene of infamy, that * The battle of Angheim was won by the accidental death of Lieu- tenant Keith, just as he was about to take advantage of the blunders of the English commanders. f Sir Walter Scott, with great probability, conjectures that the in- sinuation ia directed against Admiral Kussell, whose loyalty to Wil- liam III even when he won the naval victory at La Hogue was very suspicious. X Charles II, James II, William III, for whose memory Swift entertained no great reverence. 348 GULLIVER *s travels: I cannot reflect upon it without some seriousness. Perjury, oppression, subornation, fraud, panderism, and the like in- firmities, were among tlie most excusable arts they had to mention ; and for these I gave, as it was reasonable, great allowance. But when some confessed they owed their greatness and wealth to sodomy, or incest ; others, to the prostituting of their own wives and daughters ; others to the betraying of their country or their prince; some to poisoning; more, to the perverting of justice, in order to destroy the innocent : I hope I may be pardoned, if these discoveries inclined me a little to abate of that profound veneration which I am natumlly apt to pay to persons of high rank, who ought to be treated with the utmost respect due to their sublime dignity, by us their inferiors. I had often read of some great services done to princes and states, and desired to see the persons by whom those services were performed. Upon inquiry, I was told, "that their names were to be found on no record, except a few of them, whom history has represented as the vilest of i-ogues and traitors." As to the rest, I had never once heard of them. They all appeared with dejected looks and in the meanest habit; most of them telling me, "they died in poverty and disgrace," and the rest on a scaffold or a gibbet. Among others, there was one person whose case appeared a little singular. He had a youth about eighteen years old standing by his side. He told me " he had for many years been commander of a ship ; and in the sea-fight at Actium had the good fortune to break through the enemy's great line of battle, sink three of their capital ships, and take a fourth, which was the sole cause of Antony's flight, and of the victory that ensued ; that the youth standing by him, his only son, was killed in the action." He added, " that upon the confidence of some merit, the war being at A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 3,49 an end, he went to Rome, and solicited at the court of Augustus to be preferred to a greater ship, whose com- mander had been killed ; but, without any regard to his pretensions, it was given to a boy who had never seen the sea, the son of Libertina, who waited on one of the empe- ror's mistresses. Returning back to his own vessel, he was charged with neglect of duty, and the ship given to a fa- vorite page of Publicola, the vice-admiral; whereupon he retired to a poor farm at a great distance from Rome, and there ended his life." I was so curious to know the truth of this story, that I desired Agrippa might be called, who was admiral in that fight. He appeared, and confirmed the whole account ; but with much more advantage to the cap- tain, whose modesty had extenuated or concealed a great part of his merit. I was surprised to find corruption grown so high and so quick in that empire, by the force of luxurj' so lately in- troduced ; which made me less wonder at many parallel cases in other countries, where vices of all kinds have reigned so much longer, and where the whole praise, as well as pillage, has been engrossed by the chief commander, who perhaps had the least title to either. As every person called up made exactly the same appear- ance he had done in the world, it gave me melancholy re- flections to observe how much the race of human kind was degenerated among us, within these hundred years past; how the pox, under all its consequences and denominations, had altered every lineament of an English countenance; shortened the size of bodies, unbraced the nerves, relaxed the sinews and muscles, introduced a sallow complexion, and rendered the flesh loose and rancid. I descended so low, as to desire some English yeomen of the old stamp might be summoned to appear; once so fa- 850 Gulliver's travels: mous for the simplicity of their manners, diet, and dress ; for justice in their dealings ; for their true spirit of liberty ; for their valor, and love of their country. Neither could I be wholly unmoved, after comparing the living with the dead, when I considered how all these pure native virtues were prostituted for a piece of money by their grandchil- dren ; who, in selling their votes and managing at elections, have acquired every vice and corruption that can possibly be learned in a court.* * Few persons-can read this chapter withoutfeeling that itis acom- plete failure; "there needed no ghost to tell us" any of the^stories for which the spirits were evoked. A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 351 CHAPTER IX. THE ATTTHOR KETTJKNS TO MALDONADA — SAILS TO THE KINGDOM OF LUaONAQG — THE AUTHOR CONFINED — HE IS SENT FOR TO COURT — THE MANNER OF HIS ADMITTANCE — THE KING'S GREAT LEN- ITY TO HIS SUBJECTS. "lEAVE of his Highness the governor of Glubb- dubdrib, having been obtained, I returned with my two companions to Maldonada, where, after a fortnight's waiting, a ship was ready to sail for Luggnagg. The two gentlemen, and some others, were so generous and kind as to furnish me with provisions, and see me on board. I was a month in this voyage. We had one violent storm, and were under a necessity of steering westward to get into the trade wind, which holds for above sixty leagues. On the 21st of April, 1708, we sailed into the river of Clumegnig, which is a seaport town, at the southeast point of Luggnagg. We cast anchor within a league of the town, and made a signal for a pilot. Two of them came on board in less than half an hour, by whom we were guided between certain shoals and rocks, which are very dangerous in the passage, to a large basin, where a fleet may ride in safety to within a cable's length of the tswn wall. Some of our sailors, whether out of treachery or inad- vertence, had informed the pilots " that I was a stranger, and a great traveller ;" whereof these gave notice to a cus- tom-house officer, by whom I was examined very strictly 352 Gulliver's travels: upon my landing. This ofiGcer spoke to me in the language of Balnibarbi, which, by the force of much commerce, is generally understood in that town, especially by seamen and those employed in the customs. I gave him a short account of some particulars, and made my story as plausi- ble and consistent as I could ; but I thought it necessary to disguise my country, and call myself a Hollander ; be- cause my intentions were for Japan, and I knew the Dutch were the only Europeans permitted to enter into that king- dom. I therefore told the oificer, " that having been ship- wrecked on the coast of Balnibarbi, and cast on a rock, I was Teceived up into Laputa, or the flying island (of which lie had often heard), and was now endeavoring to get to Japan, whence I might find a convenience of returning to my own country." The officer said, " I must be confined till he could receive orders from court, for which he would write immediately, and hoped to receive an answer in a fortnight." I was carried to a convenient lodging, with a sentry placed at the door ; however I had the liberty of a large gr.rden, and was treated with humanity enough, be- ing maintained all the time at the king's charge. I was invited by several persons, chiefly out of curiosity, because it was reported that I came from countries very remote, of which they had never heard. I hired a young man, who came in the same ship, to be an interpreter: he was a native of Luggnagg, but had lived some years at Maldonada, and was a perfect master of both languages. By his assistance, I was able to hold a conver- sation with those who came to visit me ; but this consisted only of their questions and my answers. The dispatch came from court about the time we ex- pected. It contained a warrant for conducting me and my retinue to Traldragdubh, or Trildrogdrib (for it is pro- A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 353 nounced both ways as near as I can remember), by a party often horse. All my retinue was that poor lad for an in- terpreter, whom I persuaded into my service, and, at my humble request, we had each of us a mule to ride on. A messenger was dispatched half a day's journey before uSj to give the king notice of my approach ; and to desire, " that his majesty would please to appoint a day and hour, when it would be his gracious pleasure that I might have the honor to lick the dust before his footstool." This is the court style, and I found it to be more than matter of form : for, upon my admittance two days after my arrival, I was commanded to crawl upon my belly, and lick the floor as I advanced ; but, on account of my being a stranger, care was taken to have it made so clean, that the dust was' not oifensive. However, this was a peculiar grace, not allowed to any but persons of the highest I'ank, when they desire an admittance. Nay, sometimes the floor is strewed with dust on purpose, when the person to be admitted happens to have powerful enemies at court ; and I have seen a great lord with his mouth so crammed, that when he had crept to the proper distance from the throne, he was not able to speak a word. Neither is there any remedy ; because it is capital for those who receive an audience, to spit or wipe their mouths in his majesty's presence. There is indeed another custom, which I cannot altogether approve of: when the king has a mind to put any of his nobles to death in a gentle indulgent manner, he commands the floor to be strewed with a certain brown powder of a deadly composition, which, being licked up, infallibly kills him in twenty-four hours. But in justice to this prince's great clemency, and the care he has of his subjects' lives (wherein it were much to be wished that the monarchs of Europe would imitate him), it must be mentioned for his honor, 23 354 auLLiVBR's travels: that strict orders are given to have the infected parts of the floor well washed after every such execution, which, if his domestics neglect, they are in danger of incurring his royal displeasure. I myself heard him give directions, that one of his pages should be whipped, whose turn it was' to give notice about washing the floor after an execution, but ma- liciously had omitted it; by which neglect, a young lord of great hopes, coming to an audience, was unfortunately poisoned, although the king at that time had no design against his life. But this good prince wa.s so gracious as to forgive the poor page his whipping, upon promise that he would do so no more, without special orders.* To return from this digression : when I had crept within four yards of the throne, I raised myself gently upon my knees, and then striking my forehead seven times against the ground, I pronounced the following words, as they had been taught me the night before — InckpHng gloffthrobb squut scrumm blhiop mlashnalt zwin tnodbalkuff hsUiiophad gurdlvhhiasht. This is the compliment established by the laws of the land, for all persons admitted to the king's presence. It may be rendered into English thus: "May your celestial majesty outlive the sun eleven moons and a half!" To this the king returned some answer, which, although I could not understand, yet I replied as I had been directed : Fbde drin ycderiok dwuldom prastrad mir- push, which properly signifies, " My tongue is in the mouth of my friend ;" and by this expression was meant that I desired leave to bring my interpreter : whereupon the * George I was very anxious to restore the Earl of Clancarty to his title and estates, believing that the attainder of the family by the Irish Parliament was unjust : but thu party of the ascendency in Ireland re- fused to reverse the forfeiture, and the King, after a slight show of anger, was forced to acquiesce iu the continued injustice. A VOYAaE TO LAPUXA, KTC. 355 young man, already mentioned, was accordingly introduced; by whose intervention I answered as many questions as his majesty could put in above an hour. I spoke in the Bal- nibarbian tongue, and my interpreter delivered my meaning in that of Luggnagg. The king was much delighted with my company, and ordered his hliffmarhlub, or high chamberlain, to appoint a lodging in the court for me and my interpreter ; with a daily allowance for my table, and a large purse of gold for my common expenses. I stayed three months in this country, out of perfect obedience to his majesty ; who was pleased highly to favor me, and made me very honorable offers. But I thought it more consistent with prudence and justice to pass the remainder of my days with my wife and family. 356 GULLIVBR'S TRAVELS^ CHAPTER X. THE LuaaNAQGIANS COMMBNDBD — A PARTICtTLAR DESCRIPTION OF THE STRULDBRUGS, WITH MANY C'ONVERBATIONS BETWEEN THE AUTHOR AND SOMB,EMINBNT- PBESONS.UPON THAT SUBJECT. >|UGGNAGrGIANS are polite and generous; and although they are not without some share of that pride which is peculiar to all Eastern coun- tries, yet they show themselves courteous to strangers, especially such who are countenanced by the court. I had many acquaintance, and among persons of the best fashion ; and being always attended by my inter- preter, the conversation we had was not disagTeeable. One day, in much good company, I was asked by a person of quality, "whether I had seen any of their strvM- brugs, or immortals ?" I said, " I had not ;" and desired he would explain to me what he meant by such an appel- lation, applied to a mortal creature. He told me " that sometimes, though very rarely, a child liappened to be born in a family, with a red circular spot in the forehead, directly over the left eyebrow, which was an infallible mark that it should never die. The spot," as he described it, " was about the compass of a silver threepence, but in the course of time grew larger, and changed its color ; for at twelve years old it became green, so continued till five-and-twenty, then turned to a deep blue ; at five-and-forty it grew coal- black, and as large as an English shilling ; but never ad- A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 357 mitted any farther alteration." He said, "these births were so rare, that he did not believe there could be above eleven hundred struldbrugs, of both sexes, in the whole kingdom ; of which he computed about fifty in the metrop- olis, and among the rest, a young girl born about three years ago : that these productions were not peculiar to any family, but a mere effect of chance ; and the children of the struldbrugs themselves were equally mortal with the rest of the people." I freely own myself to have been struck witn inexpres- sible delight upon hearing this account; and the person who gave it me happening to understand the Balnibarbian language, which I spoke very well, I could not forbear breaking out into expressions perhaps a little too extrava- gant. I cried out, as in a rapture, " Happy nation, where every child has at least a chance for being immortal ! Happy people, who enjoy so many living examples of ancient virtue, and have masters ready to instruct them in the wisdom of all former ages ! but happiest, beyond all comparison, are those excellent struldbrugs^ who, being born exempt from that universal calamity of human na- ture, have their minds free and disengaged, without the weight and depression of spirits caused by the continual apprehension of death." I discovered my admiration, " that I had not observed any of these illustrious persons at court ; the black spot on the forehead being so remarkable a distinction, that I could not have easily overlooked it : and it was impossible that his majesty, a most judicious prince, should not provide himself with a good number of such wise and able counsellors. Yet perhaps the virtue of those reverend sages was too strict for the corrupt and libertine manners of a court ; and we often find by ex- perience, that young men are too opinionated and volatile 358 g.ulliver's travels: to be guided by tlie sober dictates of their seniors. How- ever, since the king was pleased to allow me access to his royal person, I was resolved, upon the very first occasion, to deliver my opinion to him on this matter freely and at large, by the help of my interpreter; and whether he would please to take my advice or not, yet in one thing I was determined, that his majesty having frequently offered me an establishment in this country, I would, with great thankfulness, accept the favor, and pass my life here in the conversation of those superior beings the strulJbrugs, if they would please to admit me." The gentleman to whom I addressed my discourse, be- cause (as I have already observed) he spoke the language of Balnibarbi, said to me with a sort of smile which usually arises from pity to the ignorant, "that he was glad of any occasion to keep me among them, and desired my permission to explain to the company what I had spoke." He did so, and they talked together for some time in their own language, whereof I understood not a syllable, neither could I observe by their countenances, what impression my discourse had made on them. After a short silence, the same person told me, "that his friends and mine (so he thought fit to express himself) were very much pleased with the judicious remarks I had made on the great hap- piness and advantages of immortal life, and they were de- sirous to know, in a particular manner, what scheme of living I should have formed to myself, if it had fallen to my lot to have been born a stndclb'rug f I answered, " that it was easy to be eloquent on so copious and delightful a subject, especially to me, who had been often apt to amuse myself with visions of what I should do, if I were a king, a general, or a great lord ; and upon this very case, I had frequently run over the whole system A Voyage to laputa, etc, S59 how I should employ myself, and pass the time, if I were sure to live forever. "That, if.it had been my good fortune to come into the world a stnddbrug, as soon as I could discover ray own happiness, by understanding the difference between life and death, I would first resolve, by all arts and methods whatsoever, to procure myself riches; in the pursuit of which, by thrift and management, I might reasonably ex- pect, in about two hundred years, to be the wealthiest man in the kingdom. In the second place, I would, from my earliest youth, apply myself to the .study of arts and sci- ences, by which I should arrive in time to excel all others in learning. Lastly, I would carefully record every action and event of consequence, that happened in the public, im- partially draw the characters of the several successions of princes and great ministers of state, with my own obser- vations on every point. I would exactly set down the several changes in customs, language, fashions of dress, diet, and diversions, by which acquirement, I should be a living treasure of knowledge and wisdom, and certainly become the oracle of the nation. "I would never marry after threescore, but live in a hospitable manner, yet still on the saving side. I would entertain myself in forming and directing the minds of hopeful young men, by convincing them, from my own remembrance, experience and observation, fortified by nu- merous examples, of the usefulness of virtue in public and private life. But my choice and constant companions should be a set of my own immortal brotherhood ; araong whom I would elect a dozen from the most ancient, down to my own contemporaries. Where any of these wanted fortunes I would provide them with convenient lodges around ray estate, and have some of them always at my table ; only S60 GULLIVER'S TRAVELS : mingling a few of the most valuable among you mortals, whom length of time would harden me to lose with little or no reluctance, and treat your posterity after the same manner; just as a man diverts himself with the annual succession of pinks and tulips in his garden, without re- gretting the loss of those which withered the preceding year. "These atruMbrugs, and I, would mutually communi- cate our observations and memorials, through the course of time ; remark the several gradations by which corrup- tion steals into the world, and oppose it in every step, by giving perpetual warning and instruction to mankind ; which, added to the strong influence of our own example, would probably prevent that continual degeneracy of hu- man nature, so justly complained of in all ages. "Add to this, the pleasure of seeing the various revo- lutions of states and empires; the changes in the lower and upper world ; ancient cities in ruins, and obscure vil- lages become the seats of kings; famous rivers lessening into shallow brooks ; the ocean leaving one coast dry, and overwhelming another; the discovery of many countries yet unknown ; of barbarity overrunning the politest na- tions, and the most barbarous become civilized. I should then see the discovery of the longitude, the perpetual mo- tion, the universal medicine, and many other great inven- tions, brought to the utmost perfection. " What wonderful discoveries should we make in astron- omy, by outliving and confirming our own predictions; by observing the progress and returns of comets, with the changes of motion in the sun, moon, and stars!" I enlarged upon many other topics, which the natural desire of endless life, and sublunary happiness, could easily furnish me with. When I liad ended, and the sum of my A VOYAGE TO LAPUXA, ETC. 361 discourse had been interpreted, as before, to the rest of the company, there was a good deal of talk among them in the language of the country, not without some laughter at my expense. At last, the same gentleman who had been my interpreter, said, " he was desired by the rest to set me right in a few mistakes, which I had fallen into through the common imbecility of human nature, and upon that allowance was less answerable for them. That this breed of struldbrugs was peculiar to their country, for there were no such people either in Balnibarbi or Japan, where he had the honor to be ambassador from his majesty, and found the natives in both those kingdoms very hard to believe that the fact wa-s possible : and it appeared from my aston- ishment when he first mentioned the matter to me, that I received it as a thing wholly new, and scarcely to be cred- ited. That in the two kingdoms above mentioned, where during his residence he had conversed very much, he ob- served long life to be the universal desire and wish of man- kind. That whoever had one foot in the grave was sure to hold back the other as strongly as he could. That the oldest had still hopes of living one day longer, and looked on death as the greatest evil, from which nature always prompted him to retreat. Only in this island of Lugg- nagg the appetite for living was not so eager, from the continual example of the struldbrugs before their eyes. " That the system of living contrived by me, was un- reasonable and unjust; because it supposed a perpetuity of youth, health, and vigor, which no man could be so foOlish to hope, however extravagant he may be in his wishes.* * To thia it may possibly be objected, that the perpetuity of youth, health, and vigor, would be less a prodigy than the perpetuity of life in a body subject to gradual decay, and might therefore be hoped without greater extravagance of folly ;' but the sentiment here ex- 362 Gulliver's travkls: That the question therefore was not, whether a man would choose to be always in the prime of youth, attended with prosperity and health ; but how he would pass a perpetual life, under all the usual disadvantages which old age brings along with it; for although few men will avow their de- sires of being immortal, upon such hard conditions, yet in the two kingdoms before mentioned, of Balnibarbi and Japan, he observed that every man desired to put off death some time longer, let it approach ever so late ; and he rarely heard of any man who died willingly, except he wefe in- cited by the extremity of grief or torture. And he appealed to me, whether in those countries I had travelled, as well as my own, I had not observed the same general disposi- tion."* After this preface, he gave me a particular account of the struldbrugs among them. He said " they commonly acted like mortals till about thirty years old; afler which, by degrees, they grew melancholy and dejected, increasing in pressed is that of a being to -whom immortality though not perpetual youth was familiar, and in whom the wish of perpetual youth only would have been extravagant because that only appeared from facts to be impossible. — Hawkesworth. * If it be said, that although the folly of desiring life to be pro- longed under the disadvantages of old age, is here finely exposed; yet the desire of terrestrial immortality, upon terms on which alone in the nature of things it is possible, an exemption from disease, acci- dent, and decay, is tacitly allowed: it may be answered, that as we grow old by imperceptible degrees, so for the most part we grow old without repining; and every man is ready to profess himself willing to die, when he shall be overtaken by the decrepitude of age in somo future period: yet when every other eye sees that this period is ar rived, he is still tenacious of life, and murmurs at the condition upon which he received his existence. To reconcile old age therefore to the thoughts of a dissolution, appears to be all that was necessary in a moral writer for practical purposes. — Hawkesworth. A VOYAdE TO tAPUTA, ETC. 363 both till they came to fourscore. This he learned from their own confession ; for otherwise, there not being above two or three of that species born in an age, they were too few to form a general observation by. When tliey came to four- score years, which is reckoned the extremity of living in this country, they had not only all the follies and infirmi- ties of other old men, but many more, which arose from the dreadful prospect of never dying. They were not only opinionative, peevish, covetous, morose, vain, talkative; but incapable of friendship, and dead to all natural aifec- tion, which never descended below their grandchildren. Envy, and impotent desires, are their prevailing passions. But those objects against which their envy seems principally directed, are the vices of the younger sort, and the deaths of the old. By reflecting on the former, tbey find them- selves cut oif from all possibility of pleasure ; and when- ever they see, a funeral they lament and repine that others are gone to a harbor of rest, to which they themselves never can hope to arrive. They have no remembrance of any- thing' but what they learned and observed in their youth and middle age, and even that is very imperfect; and for the truth or particulars of any fact it is safer to depend on common tradition, than upon their best recollections. The least miserable among them appear to be those who turn to dotage, and entirely lose their memories ; these meet with more pity and assistance, because they want many bad qualities which abound in others.* "If a struldbrug happen to marry one of his own kind, * In this melancholy picture, Swift shadows forth the presentiment of his own helpless old age, by which he was continually haunted : the effect of this description of the struldbrugs is very saddening, and could only have been written by a person who anticipatod a wretched old age. 364 Gulliver's travels: the marriage is dissolved of course, by the courtesy of the kingdom, as soon as the younger of the two comes to be fourscore; for the law thinks it a reasonable indulgence, that those who are condemned without any fault of their own to a perpetual continuance in the world, should not have their misery doubled by the load of a wife. " As soon as they have completed the term of eighty years they are looked on as dead in law ; their heirs im- mediately succeed to their estates ; only a stnall pittance is reserved for their support ; and the poor ones are main- tained at tlie public charge. After that period they are held incapable of any employment of trust or profit ; they cannot purchase lands, or take leases; neither are they allowed to be witnesses in any cause, either civil or crimi- nal, not even for the decision of meers and bounds. " At ninety, they lose their teeth and hair : they have at that age no distinction of taste, but eat and drink what- ever they can get, without relish or appetite. The diseases they were subject to still continue, without increasing or diminishing. In talking they forget the common appella- tion of things, and t-he names of persons, even of those who are their nearest friends and relations. For the same reason, they never can amuse themselves with reading, because their memory will not serve to carry them from the beginning of a sentence to the end ; and by this defect, they are deprived of the only entertainment whereof they might otherwise be capable. " The language of this country being always upon the flux, the druldbrugs of one age do not understand those of another ; neither are they able, after two hundred years, to hold any conversation (farther than by a few general words) with their neighbors the mortals ; and thus they A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 865 lie under the disadvantage of living like foreigners in their own country." This was the account given me of the strvMbrugs as near as I can remember. I afterward saw five or six of different ages, the youngest not above two hundred years old, -who were brought to me at several times by some of my friends ; but although they were told " that I was a traveller, and had seen all the world," they had not the least curiosity to ask me a question; only desired "I would give them slumshudask, or a token of remembrance ;" which is a modest way of begging, to avoid the law, that strictly forbids it, because they are provided for by the public, although indeed with a very scanty allowance. They are despised and hated by all sorts of people. When one of them is born it is reckoned ominous, and their birth is recorded very particularly : so that you may know their age by consulting the register, which, however, has not been kept above a thousand years past, or at least has been destroyed by time or public disturbances. But the usual way of computing how old they are, is by asking them what kings or great persons they can remember, and then consulting history ; for infallibly the last prince in their mind did not begin his reign after they were four- score years old. They were the most mortifying sights I ever beheld; and the women were more horrible than the men. Besides the lisual deformities in extreme old age, they acquired an additional ghastliness, in proportion to their number of years, which is not to be described ; and among half a dozen, I soon distinguished which was the eldest, although there was not above a century or two between them. The reader will easily believe, that from what I had heard and seen my keen appetite for perpetuity of life was 366 OULIilVEE'S TKAVBLS; much abated. I grew heartily ashamed of the pleasing visions I had formed ; and thought no tyrant could invent a death, into which I would not run with pleasure, from such a life. The king heard of all that had passed between me and my friends upon this occasion, and rallied me very pleas- antly; wishing I could send a couple of strvJdbrugs to my own country, to arm our people against the fear of death;* but this, it seems, is forbidden by the fundamental laws of the kingdom, or else I should have been well content with the trouble and expense of transporting them. I could not but agree, that the laws of this kingdom relative to the struldhrugs were founded upon the strongest reasons, and such as any other country would be under the necessity of enacting, in the like circumstances. Otherwise, as avarice is the necessary consequent of old age, those immortals would in time become proprietors of the whole nation and engross the civil power, which, for want of abilities to manage, must end in the ruin of the public. * Perhaps it may not be wholly useless to remark that the sight of a struldbrug would no otherwise arm those against the fear of death, who have no hope beyond it, than a man is armed against the fear of breaking his limbs, who jumps out of a window when hi» house is on fire. — Hawkesworth, A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 367 CHAPTER XI. THK AUTHOR LEATTSS LtrGQNAQG, AND SAILS TO JAPAN — PROM THENOB HE RETURNS IN A DUTCH SHIP TO AMSTERDAM, AND FROM AM- STERDAM TO ENGLAND. ' UDGING this account of the struMhrugs might be some entertainment to the reader, because it seems to be a little out of the common way ; at least I do not remember to have met the like in any book of travels that has come to my hands: and if I am deceived, my excuse must be, that it is necessary for travellers who describe the same country, very often to agree in dwelling on the same particulars, without deserv- ing the censure of having borrowed or transcribed from those who wrote before them. There is indeed a perpetual commerce between this king- dom and the great empire of Japan ; and it is very probable, that the Japanese authors may have given some account ■ of the struMbrugs ; but my stay in Japan was so short, and I was so entirely a stranger to the language, that I was not qualified to make any inquiries. But I hope the Dutch, upon this notice, will be curious and able enough to supply my defects. His majesty having often pressed me to accept some em- ployment in his court, and finding me absolutely deter- mined to return to my native country, was pleased to give me his license to depart ; and honored me with a letter of recommendation under his own hand, to the Emperor of Japan. He likewise presented me with four hundred and forty-four large pieces of gold (this nation delighted in even 368 GULLIVER'S travels: numbers), and a red diamond, which I sold in England for eleven hundred pounds. On the 6th of May, 1709, I took a solemn leave of his majesty, and all my friends. This prince was so gracious as to order a guard to conduct me to Glanguenstald, which is a royal port to the southwest part of the island. In six days I found a vessel ready to carry me to Japan ; and spent fifteen days in the voyage. We landed at a small port-town called Xamoschi, situated on the southeast part of Japan ; the town lies on the western point, where there is a narrow strait leading northward into a long arm of the sea, upon the northwest part of which Yedo, the metrop- olis, stands. At landing I showed the custom-house officers my letter from the king of Luggnagg to his imperial majesty. They knew the seal perfectly well ; it was as broad as the palm of my hand. The impression was, " A king lifting up a lame beggar from the earth." The magistrates of the town, hearing of my letter, received me as a public minister ; they provided me with carriages and servants, and bore my charges to Yedo, where I was ad- mitted to an audience, and delivered my letter, which was opened with great ceremony, and explained to the emperor by an interpreter ; who then gave me notice, by his raaj-. esty's order, " that I should signify my request, and what- ever it were, it should be granted, for the sake of his royal brother of Luggnagg." This interpreter was a person employed to transact affairs with the Hollanders ; he soon conjectured, by my countenance, that I was an European, and therefore repeated his majesty's commands in Low Dutch, which he spoke perfectly well. I answered, as I had before determined, " that I was a Dutch merchant, shipwrecked in a very remote country, whence I had travelled by sea and land to Luggnagg, and then took shipping for Japan ; where I knew my countrymen often A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC. 369 traded, and with some of these I hoped to get an oppor- tunity of returning into Europe : I therefore most humbly entreated his royal favor, to give order that I should be conducted in safety to Nangasac." To this I added another petition, "that for the sake of my patron the king of Luggnagg, his majesty would condescend to excuse ray performing the ceremony imposed on my countrymen, of trampling upon the crucifix ; because I had been thrown into this kipgdom by my misfortunes, without any inten- tion of trading." When this latter petition was interpreted to the emperor, he seemed a little surprised; and said, "he believed I was the first of my countrymen who ever made any scruple in this point; and that he began to doubt whether I was a real Hollander, or not ; but rather sus- pected I must be a Christian. However, for the reasons I liad oflFered,but chiefly to gratify the king of Luggnagg by an uncommon mark of his favor,, he would comply with the singularity of my humor ; but the affair must be man- aged with dexterity, and his officers should be commanded to let me pass, as it were by foi-getfulness ; for he assured me, that if the secret should be discovered by my country- men the Dutch, they would out my throat on the voyage." I returned my thanks, by the interpreter, for so unusual a favor ; and some troops being at that time on the march to Nangasac, the commanding officer had orders to convey me safe thither, with particular instructions about the business of the crucifix. On the 9th of June, 1709, 1 arrived at Nangasac, after a very long and troublesome journey. I soon fell into the company of some Dutch sailors belonging to the Ambo}- na, of Amsterdam, a stout ship of 450 tons. I had lived long in Holland, pursuing my studies at Leyden, and I spoke Dutch well. The seamen soon knew whence 24 870 Gulliver's travels. I came last ; they were curious to inquire into my voyagef? and course of life. I made up a story as short and prob- able as I could, but concealed the greatest part. I knew many persons in Holland ; I was able to invent names for my parents, whom I pretended to be obscure people in tiie province of Guelderland. 1 would have given the cap- tain (one Theodorus Yangrult) what he pleased to ask for my voyage to Holland ; but understanding I was a sur- geon, he was contented to take half the usual rate, on con- dition that I would serve him in the way of my calling. Before we took shipping, I was often asked by some of the crew, "whether I had performed the ceremony above mentioned?" I evaded the question by general answers; "that I had satisfied the emperor and court in all particu- lars." However, a malicious rogue of a skipper went to an officer, and pointing to me, told him, " I had not yet trampled on the crucifix ;" but the other, who had received instructions to let me pass, gave the rascal twenty strokes on the shoulders with a bamboo; after which I was no more troubled with such questions. Nothing happened worth mentioning in this voyage. We sailed with a fair wind to the Cape of Good Hope, where we stayed only to take in fresh water. On the 10th of April, 1710, we arrived safe at Amsterdam, having lost only three men by sickness on the voyage, and a fourth, who fell from the foremast into the sea, not far from the coast of Guinea. From Amsterdam I soon after set sail for England, in a small vessel belonging to that city. On the 16th of April we put in at the Downs. I landed next morning, and saw once more iny native coun- try, after an absence of five years and six months com- plete. I went straight to Redriff, where I arrived the same day at two in the afternoon, and found my wife and family in good health. APPENDIX TO LAPUTA. Ballan ON THE SOUTH SEA SCHEME. Bt dean swift. This ballad was written to expose the mania for stockjobbing and speculation which prevailed in 1720, and elucidates some of the schemes satirized in the description of the Academy of Lagado. Yk wise philosophers, explain What magic makes our money rise, When dropp'd into tbe Southern main ; Or do these jugglers cheat our eyes ? Put in your money, fairly told, Presto I begone I — 'tis here again : Ladies and gentlemen, behold, — Here's every piece as big as ten ! Thus, in a basin drop a shilling, Then fill the vessel to the brim, Tou shall observe, as you are filling, The ponderous metal seems to swim. It rises both in bulk and height. Behold it swelling like a sop ; The liquid medicine cheats your sight, — • Behold it mounted to the top. (371) 372 APPENDIX TO LAPUTA, ETC. " In stock three hundred thousand pound, I have in view a lord's estate ; My manors all contiguous round, A coaclr and six, and served in plate!" Thus the deluded bankrupt raves, Puts all upon a desperate bet. Then plunges in the Southern waves. Dipped over head and ears — in debt. So, by a calenture misled, The mariner with rapture sees On the smooth ocean's azure bed, Enamelled fields and verdant trees. With eager haste he longs to rove In that fantastic scene, and thinks It must be some enchanted grove. And in he leaps, and down he sinks. Pive hundred chariots, just bespoke, Are sunk in these devouring waves, — The horses drown'd, the harness broke, And here the owners find their graves. Like Pharaoh, by directors led ; They with their spoils went safe before '< His chariots tumbling out the dead, Lay shatter'd on the Eed Sea shore. Raised up on Hope's aspiring plumes. The young adventurer o'er the deep. An eagle's flight and state assumes, And scorns the middle- way to keep. On paper wings he takes his flight, With wax the father bound them fast; The wavs is melted by the height, And down the towering boy is cast. A1'I>ENDIX to LAPtTA, ETC. S73 A moralist might here explain The rashness of the Cretan youth, — Describe his fall into the main, And from a fable form a truth. His wings are his paternal rent, He melts the wax as every flame ; His credit sunk, his money spent, In Southern Seas he leaves his name. Inform us, you that best can tell. Why in yon dangerous gulf profound. Where hundreds and where thousands fell, Fools chiefly float, the wise are drown'd? So have I seen, from Severn's brink, A flock of geese jump down together, Swim where the bird of Jove would sink. And swimming, never wet a feather. But I afirm 'tis false, in fact, Directors better know their tools ; We see the nation's credit cracked. Bach knave has made a thousand fools. One fool may from another win, And then get off with money stored, But if a sharper once comes in, He throws at all, and sweeps the board. As flshes on each other prey. The great ones swallowing up the small ; So fares it in the Southern Sea, The whale directors eat up all. When stock is high, they come between, Making by secondhand their offers, Then cunningly retire unseen, With each a million in his coffers. 374 APPENDIX TO LAPUTA, ETC, So when upon a moonshine night, An aas was drinking at a stream, A cloud arose and stopped the light, By intercepting every beam. The day of judgment will be soon, Cries out a sage among the crowd, An ass has swallowed up the moon — The moon lay safe behind a cloud.- Each poor subscriber to the sea, Sinks down at once, and there he lies ; Directors fall as well as they. Their fall is but a trick to rise. So fishes, rising from the main, Can soar with moistened wings on high , The moisture dried, they sink a^ain. And dip their fins again to fly. Undone at play, the female troops Come here their losses to retrieve ; Ride o'er the waves in spacious hoops, Like Lapland witches in a sieve. Thus Venus to the sea descends. As poets feign ; but where 's the moral? It shows the queen of love intends To search the sea for pearl and coral. The sea is richer than tho land , I heard it from my grannam's mouth ; Which now I clearly understand, For by the sea she meant the south. Thus, by directors, we are told, " Pray, gentlemen, believe your eyes; Our ocean's covered o'er with gold, Look round and see how thick it lies ; APPENDIX TO LAPOTA, ETC. 375 " We, gentlemen, are your assisters. We'll come and hold you by the chin : " Alas I all is not gold that glisters, Then thousands sink by leaping in. Oh 1 would those patriots be so kind, Here in the deep to wash their hands, Then like Pactolus, we should find. The sea indeed had golden sands. A shilling in the bath you. fling : The silver takes a nobler hue, By magic virtue in the spring, And seems a guinea to your view. But as a guinea will not pass At market for a farthing more, Shown through a multiplying-glass, Than what it always did before ; So cast it in the Southern seas. Or view it through a jobber's bill; — Put on what spectacles you please. Your guinea's but a guinea still. One night a fool into a brook. Thus from a hillock looking down, The golden stars for guineas took. And silver Cynthia for a crown. The point he could no longer doubt : He ran, he leaped into the flood ; There sprawl'd awhile, and scarce got out. All cover'd o'er with slime and mud. " Upon the water cast thy bread. And after many days thou'lt find it;" But gold upon this ocean spread, Shall sink, and leave no mark behind it. S76 APPENDIX TO LAPUTA, ETC. There 13 a gulf where thousands fell, Here all the bold adventurers came, A narrow sound, though deep as hell ; — Change Alley is the dreadful name. Nine times a day it ebbs and flows. Yet he that on the surface lies. Without a pilot seldom knows The time it falls or when 'twill rise. Subscribers here by thousands float, And jostle one another down ; Each paddling in his leaky boat, And there they fish for gold, and drown. Now buried in the depths below. Now mounted up to heaven again. They reel and stagger to and fro, At their wits' end, like drunken men. Meantime, secure on Garraway cliffs, A savage race, by shipwrecks fed, Lie waiting for the founder-d skiffs, And strip the bodies of the dead. But these, you say, are fictious lies, Prom some malicious Tory's brain ; For where directors get a prize, The Swiss and Dutch whole millions drain. Thus, when by rooks a lord is plied, Some cully often wins a bet, By venturing on the cheating side, Though not into the secret let. While some build castles in the air, Directors build them in the seas ; Subscribers plainly see them there, — For fools will see as wise men please. APPENDIX TO LAPUTA, ETC. 377 Thus oft by mariners are shown — Unless the men of Kent are liars — Earl Godwin's castles overthrown, And palace roofs and steeple spires. Mark where the sly directors creep, Nor to the shore approach too nigh ! The monsters nestle in the deep, To seize you in your passing by. Then, like the dogs of Nile, be wise, Who taught by instinct how to shun The crocodile, that lurking lies, Eun as they drink, and drinking run. Antseus could, by magic charms. Recover strength whene'er he fell ; Alcides held him in his arms, And sent him up in air to hell. Directors thrown into the sea. Recover strength and vigor there ; But may be tamed another way, Suspended for awhile in air I Directors ! for 'tis you I warn, By long experience we have found What planet ruled when you were born ; We see you never can be drown'd. Beware, nor over-bulky grow, Nor come within your cully's reach ; For if the sea should sink so low, To leave you dry upon the beach. You'll owe your ruin to your bulk ; Your foes already waiting stand. To tear you like a founder'd hulk, While you lie helpless on the strand. 878 APPENDIX TO LAPtJTA, ETC. Thus, when a whale has lost the tide, The coasters crowd to seize the spoil ; The monster into parts divide, And strip the bones, and melt the oil. O I may some western tempest sweep These locusts whom our fruits have fed, That plague, directors, to the deep. Driven from the South Sea to the Red ! May He, whom Nature's laws obey. Who lifts the poor and sinks the proud. Quiet the raging of the sea, And still the madness of the crowd !" But never shall our isles have rest Till those devouring swine run down, — The devils leaving the possessed, — And headlong in the waters drown. The nation then, too late, will find. Computing all their cost and trouble. Directors' promises but wind, South Sea at best a mighty bubble. The second ballad, to which allusion is made on page 317, is by an unknown author ; it produced a great effect in its time, and possesses too much merit to be allowed to sink into oblivion. It is copied from a broadside in a private collection. APPENDIX TO LAPUTA, ETC. .379 A SOUTH SEA BALLAD; OR, MERRY REMARKS UPOM EXCHANGE ALLEY BUBBLES. TO A NEW TUNE, CALLED "THE GRAND ELIXIR; OR, THE PHILOSOPHER'S STONE DISCOVERED." In London stands a famous pile, And near that pile an Alley, Where many crowds for riches toil, And wisdom stoops to folly. Here sad and joyful, high and low, Court Fortune for her graces. And as she smiles or frowns, they show Their gestures and grimaces. II. Here stars and garters do appear. Among our lords the rabble ; To buy and sell, to see and hear The Jews and Gentiles squabble. Here crafty courtiers are too wise For those who trust id Fortune ; They see the cheat with clearer eyes. Who peep behind the curtain. Our greatest ladies hither come. And ply in chariots daily ; Oft pawn their j ewels for a sum . To venture in the Alley. Young harlots, too, from Drury Lane, Approach the 'Change in coaches, To fool away the gold they gain By their obscene debauches. S80 APPENDIX TO LAPtTTA, ETC. Long heads may thrive by sober rules, Because they think, and drfnk not, But head-longs are our thriving fools, Who only drink and think not. The lucky rogues, like spaniel dogs, Leap into South Sea water, And there they fish for golden frogs, Not caring what comes arter. T. 'Tis said, that alchemists of old Could turn a brazen kettle. Or leaden cistern, into gold, That noble, tempting metal ; — But if it here may be allowed To bring in great and small things, Our cunning South Sea, like a god. Turns nothing into all things. TI. What need have we of Indian wealth. Or commerce with our neighbors ? Our constitution is in health. And riches crown our labors. Our South Sea ships have golden shrouds,- They bring us wealth, 'tis granted ; But lodge their treasure in the clouds. To hide it, till 'tis wanted. Til. O Britain I bless thy present state. Thou only happy nation. So oddly rich, so madly great. Since bubbles came in fashion. Successful rakes exert their pride. And count their airy millions, While homely drabs in coaches ride, Brought up to town on pillions. APPENDIX TO LAPUTA, ETC. 381 Pew men who follow reason's rules Grow fat with South Sea diet ; Young rattles and unthinking fools Are those who flourish by it : Old musty jades, and pushing blades, Who've least consideration, Grow rich apace ; while wiser heads Are struck with admiration. A race of men who, t'other day, Lay crush 'd beneath disasters. Are now by stock brought into play. And made our lords and masters. But should our South Sea Babel fall. What numbers would be frowning I The losers then must ease their gall By hanging or by drowning. Five hundred millions, notes and bonds, Our stocks are worth in value ; But neither lie in goods, or lands, Or money, let me tell you. Yet though oiir foreign trade is lost Of mighty wealth we vapor ; When all the riches that we boast Consist in scraps of paper. 382 APPENDIX TO LAPUTA, ETC. The following humorous attack on the Report of the Secret Com- mittee in Atterbury's case has been referred to more than once in the preceding pages ; it completes the satire directed against the Eepart in the description of the Academy of Lagado, page 335. UPON THE HORRID PxiOT DISCOVERED BY HAKLEQUIN THE BISHOP OP ROCHESTBE'S FRENCH DOG. In a Dialogue betwbbk a Whig and Toet. I ask'd a Whig the other night How came the wicked plot to light ? He answer'd, that a dog, of late, Inform'd a minister of state. Said I, from that I nothing know, For are not all informers so ? A villain who his friend betrays, We style him by no other phrase; And so a perjured dog denotes Porter, and Prendergast, and Oates, And forty others I could name. Whig. — But sir, they say the dog was lame ? Tory. — A weighty argument indeed : Your evidence was lame ; — proceed, Come, help your latne dog o'er the stile. Whig. — Sir, you mistake me all the while, — I mean a dog without a joke. Can howl, and bark, but never spoke. Tory. — I 'm still to seek which dog you mean. Whether cur Pluukett, or whelp Skean,* An English or an Irish hound, * Plunkett and Skean, or Skinner, were two of the principal wit- nesses before the Privy Council, APPENDIX TO LAPUTA, ETC. 383 Or t' other puppy that was drown'd ; * Or Mason, that abandon'd bitch ; f Then pray be free, and tell me which : For every stander-by was marking That all the noise they made was barking. Tou pay them well : the dogs have got Their dogs' heads in a porridge pot: And 'twas but just, for wise men say. That every dog must have his day. Dog Walpole laid a quart of nog on 't. He 'd either make a hog or dog on 't, And look'd, since he has got his wish. As if he had thrown dovm a dish ; Yet thus I dare foretell you from it. He'll soon return to his own vomit. Whig. — Besides this horrid plot was found By Neynoe after he was drown'd. Tory. — Why, then the proverb is not right, Since you can teach dead dogs to bite. Whig. — I proved my proposition full, But Jacobites are strangely dull. Now let me tell you plainly, sir, Our witness is a real cur ; . A dog of spirit for his years, — • Has twice two legs, two hanging ears ; His name is Harlequin I wot, And that 's a name in every plot ; Eesolved to save the British nation, Though French by birth and education ; His correspondence, plainly dated. Was all decipher'd and translated ; His answers were exceeding pretty, Before the secret wise Committee ; Confess'd as plain as he could bark, Then with his foirefoot set his mark. * Neynoe, whose evidence pressed very hard on the Bishop, was drowned in attempting his escape. His examinations before the Privy Council were received as evidence before the Lords on the Bill of Attainder. f Mrs. Mason's evidence was of far less importance than kSwift intimates. 384 APPKNDIX TO LAPUTA, ETC. Tory. — Then all this while I have been bubbled I thought it was a dog in doublet; The matter now no longer sticks, For statesmen never want dog-tricks; But since it was a real cur, And not a dog in metaphor, I give you joy of the report That he 's to have a place at court. Whig. — Yes, and a place he will get rich in,- A turnspit in the royal kitchen. Sir, to be plain, I tell you what. We had occasion for the plot : And when we found the dog begin it. We guess'd the bishop's foot was in it. Tory. — I own it was a dangerous project. But you have proved it by dog-logic. Sure such intelligence between A dog and bishop ne'er were seen ; Till you began to change the breed, Yovj- bishops all are dogs indeod. A VOYAGE TO THE COUNTRY OF THE HOUYHNHNMS. m CHAPTER I. THE AUTHOR SETS OUT AS CAPTAIN OF A SHIP — HIS MEN CONSPIRE AGAINST HIM, CONFINE HIM A LONG TIME TO HIS CABIN, AND SET HIM ON SHORE IN AN UNKNOWN LAND — HE TRAVELS UP INTO THE COUNTRY — THE YAHOOS, A STRANGE SORT OF ANI- MAL, DESCRIBED — THE AUTHOR MEETS TWO HOUYHNHNMS. USTLY as I may be blamed for a rambling disposition, I must confess that my love of ad- venture was not extinguished by the dangers recited in the preceding parts of my travels. I continued at home with my wife and children, about five months, in a very happy condition, if I could have learned the lesson of knowing when I was well. I left my poor wife big with child, and accepted an advantageous offer made me to be captain of- the Adventure, a stout merchantman of 350 tons : for I understood navigation well, and being grown weary of a surgeon's employment at sea, which, however, I could exercise upon occasion, I took a skilful young man of that calling, one Robert Purefoy, into my ship. We set sail from Portsmouth, 25 ( 385 ) ■ 386 GULLIVER'S TRAVELS. upon the 7th day of September, 1710 : on the 14th, we met with Captain Pocock, of Bristol, at Teneriffe, \yho was going to the bay of Campechy to cut logwood. On the 16th, lie was parted from us by a storm : I heard since my return, that his ship foundered, and none escaped but one cabin-boy. He was an honest man, and a good sailor, hut a little too ] i ositive i n his o wn opinions, which was the P!iriae _nf his jestructio n, as it has been of ^e veraF .Q^ers^for if he had followed~my aJTvice, he might have been safe at home with his family at this time as well as myself. I had several men died in my ship of calentures, so that I was forced to get recruits out of Barbadoes and the Leeward Islands, where I touched, by the direction of the merchants who-employed me ; which I had soon too much cause to repent ; for I found afterwards, that most of them had been buccaneers.* I had fifty hands on board, and my orders were, that I should trade with the Indians in the South Sea, and make what discoveries I could. These rogues, whom I had picked up, debauched my other men, and they all formed a conspiracy to seize the ship, and secure me; which they did one morning, rushing into my cabin, and binding me hand and foot, threatenmg to throw me overboard, if 1 offered to stir. I told them, " I was fheir prisoner and would submit." This they made me swear to do, and then they unbound me, only fastening one of my legs with a cliain, near my bed, and placed a sentry at my door with his piece charged, who was com- manded to shoot me dead, if I attempted my liberty. They sent me down victuals and drink, and took the * Certain pirates, that infested the West Indies, were so called. — Sawkesworih. A VOYAGE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 381 government of the ship to themselves. Their design was to turn pirates, and plunder the Spaniards, which they could not do till they got more men. But first they re- solved to sell the goods in the ship, and then go to Mada- gascar for recruits, several among them having died since my confinement. They sailed many weeks, and traded with the Indians; but I knew not what course they took, being kept a close prisoner in my cabin, and expecting nothing less than to be murdered, as they often threatened me. Upon the 9th day of May, 1711, one James Welch came down to my cabin, and said " he had orders from the cap- tain to set me ashore." I expostulated with him, but in vain ; neither would he so much as tell me who their new captain was. They forced me into the long-boat, letting me put on my best suit of clothes, which were as good as new, and take a small bundle of linen, but no arms, except my hanger; and they were so civil as not to search my pockets, into which I conveyed what money I had, with some other little necessaries. They rowed about a league, and then set me down on a strand. I desired them to tell me what country it was. They all swore, " they knew no more than myself;" but said, " that the captain (as they called him) was resolved, after they had sold the lading, to get rid of me in the first place where they could discover land." They pushed oif immediately , advising me to make haste for fear of being overtaken by the tide, and so bade me farewell. In tHis desolate condition I advanced forward, and soon got upon firm ground, where I sat down on a bank to rest myself, and consider what I had best do. When I was a little refreshed, I went up into the country, resolving to deliver myself to the first savages I should meet, and pur- 888 GULLIVER'S travels: chase my life from them by some bracelets, glass rings, and other toys, which sailors usually provide themselves with in those voyages, and whereof I had some about me. The land was divided by long rows of trees, not regularly planted, but naturally growing ; there was great plenty of grass, and several fields of oats. I walked very circum- spectly, for fear of being surprised, or suddenly shot with an arrow from behind, or on either side. I fell into a beaten road, where I saw many tracks of human feet, and some of cows, but most of horses. At last I beheld several animals in a field, and one or two of the same kind sitting in trees. Their shape was very singular and deformed, which a little discomposed me, so that I lay down behind a thicket to observe them better. Some of them coming for- ward near the place where I lay, gave me an opportunity of distinctly marking their form. Their heads and breasts were covered with a thick hair, some frizzled, and others lank ; they had beards like goats, and a long ridge of hair down their backs, and the foreparts of their legs and feet ; but the rest of their bodies was bare, so that I might see their skins, which were of a brown buff color. They had no tails, nor any hair at all on their buttocks, except about the anus ; which, I presume, nature had placed there to de- fend them, as they sat on the ground ; for this posture they used, as well as lying down, and often stood on their hind feet. They climbed high trees as nimbly as a squirrel, for they had strong extended claws before and behind, terminat- ing in sharp points, and hooked. They would often spring, and bound, and leap, with prodigious agility. The females were not so large as the males ; they had long lank hair ou their head, but none on their faces, nor anything more than a sort of down on the rest of their bodies, except about the anus and pudenda. The dugs hung between their fore-feet, A VOYAaE TO THE HOtfYHNBNMS. 389 aiid often reached almost to the ground as they walked. The hair of both sexes was of several colors, brown, red, black, and yellow. U pon the whol e, I never be held, in a ll my travels, so_ _djsagr£e able an animal, or one again st w hich I naturally o.rt\to.pive.(\ sQ _ ^reat an antipathy ; so that thinking I had seen enough, full of contempt and aversion, I got up, and pursued the beaten road, hoping it might direct me to the cabin of some Indian. I had not gone far, when I met one of those creatures full in my way, and coming up directly to me. The ugly monster, when he saw me, distorted several ways every feature of his visage, and stared, as at an object he had never seen before ; then approaching nearer, lifted up his fore-paw, whether out of curiosity or mischief I could not tell; butl drew my hanger, and gave him a good blow with the flat side of it, for I durst not strike with the edge, fearing the inhabitants might be provoked against me, if they should come to know that I had killed or maimed any of their cattle. When the beast felt the smart, he drew back, and roared so loud, that a herd of at least forty came flocking about me from the next field, howling and making odious faces ; but I ran to the body of a tree, and leaning my back against it, kept them off by waving my hanger. Several of this cursed brood, getting hold of the branches behind, leaped up into the tree, whence they began to discharge their excrements on my head ; however, I escaped pretty well by sticking close to the stem of the tree, but was almost stifled with the filth, which fell about me on every side. In tihe midst of this distress, I observed all to run away on a sudden as fast as they could ; at which I ventured to leave the tree, and pursue the road, wondering what it was that could put them into tliis fright. But looking on my left hand, I saw a horse walking softly in the field ; which 390 auLii:vE.R's travels; my persecutors having sooner discovered, was the cause of their flight. The horse started a little, when he came near me, but soon recovering himself, looked full in my face with manifest tokens of wonder. He viewed my hands and feet, walking round me several times. I would have pursued my journey, but he placed himself directly iu the way, yet looking with a very mild aspect, never oifer- ing the least violence. We stood gazing at each other for some time ; at last I took the boldness to reach my hand towards his neck with a design to stroke it, using the common style and whistle of jockeys, when they are going to handle a strange horse. But this animal seemed to re- ceive my civilities with disdain, shook his head, and bent his brows, softly raising up his right forefoot to remove my hand. Then he neighed three or four times, but in so dif- ferent a cadence, that I almost began to think he was speaking to himself, in some language of his own. While he and I were thus employed, another horse came up; who applying himself first in a very formal manner, they gently struck each other's right hoof before, neighing several times by turns, and varying the sound, which seemed to be almost articulate. They went some paces off, as if it were to confer together, walking side by side, back- ward and forward, like persons deliberating upon some affair of weight, but often turning their eyes towards me, as it were to watch that I might not escape. I was amazed to see such actions and behavior in brute beasts ; and con- cluded with myself, that if the inhabitants of this country were endued with a proportionable degree of reason, they must needs be the wisest people upon earth. This thought gave me so much comfort, that I resolved to go forward, until I could discover some house or village, or meet with any of the natives, leaving the two horses to discourse to- A VOYAGE TO TBE HOtJYHNHNMS. 391 gether as they pleased. But the first, who was a dapple gray, observing me to steal off, neighed after me in so ex- pressive a tone, that I fancied myself to understand what lie meant; whereupon I turned back, and came near to him, to expect his farther commands, biit concealing my fuar as much as I could ; for I began to be in some pain how this adventure might terminate; and the reader will easily believe I did not much like my present situation. The two horses came up close to me, looking with great earnestness upon my face and hands. The gray steed rubbed my hat all round with his right fore hoof, and discomposed it so much that I was forced to adjust it better by taking it off, and settling it, again ; whereat both he and his compan- ion (who was a brown bay) appeared- to be much sur- prised ; the latter felt the lappet of my coat, and finding it to hang loose about me, they both looked with new signs of wonder. He stroked my right hand, seeming to admire the softness and color ; but he squeezed it so hard between his hoof and his pastern, that I was forced to roar; after which they both touched me with all possible tenderness. They were under great perplexity about my shoes and stockings, which they felt very often, neighing to each other, and using various gestures, not unlike those of a philosopher, when he would attempt to solve some new and difficult phenomenon. Upon the whole, the behavior of these animals was so orderly and ra tiona l, so acute and judi'^ious, that J at last concluded they must needs be magicians, who had thus metamorphosed themselves upon some design, and seeing a stranger in the way, resolved to divert themselves with him ; or, perhaps were really amazed at the sight of a man so very different in habit, feature, and complexion, from tiiose who might probably live in so remote a climate. 392 qulliveb's travels: Upon the strength of this reasoning, I ventured to address them in the following manner : " Gentlemen, if you be conjurors, as I have good cause to believe, you can under- stand any language; therefore I make bold to let your wor- ships know that I am a poor distressed Englishman, driven by his misfortunes upon your coast; and I entreat one of you to let me ride upon hLs back, as if he were a real horse, to some house or village where I can be relieved. In re- turn of which favor, I will make you a present of this knife and bracelet;" taking them out of my pocket. The two creatures stood silent while I spoke, seeming to listen with great attention ; and when I had ended, they neighed frequently .towards each other, as if they were engaged in serious conversation. I plainly observed that their lan- guage expressed the passions very well, and the words might, with little pains, be resolved into an alphabet more easily than the Chinese. I could frequently distinguish the word Yahoo, which was repeated by each of them several times ; and although it was impossible for me to conjecture what it meant, yet, while the two horses were busy in conversation, I endeav- ored to practice this word upon my tongue; and as soon as they were silent, I boldly pronounced Yahoo, in a loud voice, imitating at the same time, as near as I could, the ^neighing of a horse; at which they were both visibly sur- prised, and the gray repeated the same word twice, as if he meant to teach the right accent ; wherein I spoke after him as well as I could, and found myself perceivably to im- prove every time, though very far from any degree of per- fection. Then the bay tried me with a second word, much harder to be pronounced; but reducing it to the English orthography may be spelt thus — Houyhnhnm. I did not succeed in this so well as in the former ; but afler two or A VOYAGE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 393 three farther trials, I had better fortune, and they both appeared amazed at my capacity. After some further discourse, which I then conjectured might relate to me, the two frieuds took their leaves with the same compliment of striking each other's hoof, and the gray made me signs that I should walk before him : wherein I thought it prudent to comply, till I could find a better director. When I oiFered to slacken my pace, he would cry hhuun, hhuun. I guessed his meaning and gave him to understand, as well as I could, " that I was weary, and not able to walk faster;" upon which he would stand awhile to let me rest. 394 Gulliver's travels CHAPTER II. THK AXTTHOR CONDITOTED BY A HOWTHNHNM TO HTS HOUSE — THB nOUSK DBSCRIBKD — THE AUTHOR'S RECRPTION — THE TODD OP THK HOUYHNHNMS — THE AUTHOR IN DISTRESS FOR WANT OP MEAT — IS AT LAST RELIEVED — HIS MANNER OF FEEDING IN THIS COUNTRY. FTER having travelled about three miles, we came to a long kind of building, made, of tim- ber stuck in the ground, and wattled across; the roof was low, and covered with straw. I now began to be a little comforted ; and took out some toys, which travellers usually carry for presents to the sav- age Indians of America, and other parts, in hopes the peo- ple of the house would be thereby encouraged to receive me kindly. The horse made me a sign to go in first; it was a large room with a smooth clay floor, and a rack and manger, extending the whole length on one side. There were three nags and two mares, not eating, but some of them sitting down upon their hams, which I very much wondered at ; but wondered more to see the rest employed in domestic business; these seemed but ordinary cattle; however, this confirmed my first opinion, that a people who could so far civilize brute animals must needs excel in wis- dom all the nations of the world. The gray came in just after, and thereby prevented any ill-treatment which the others miglit have given me. He neighed to them several times in a style of authority, and received answers. A Voyage to the houyhnhnms. S95 Beyond this room there were three others, reaching the length of the house, to which yon passed through three doors, opposite to each other, ia the manner of a vista; we went through the second room towards the tliird. Here the gray walked in first, beckoning me to attend : I waited in the second room, and got ready my presents for the master and mistress of the house: they were two knives, three bracelets of false pearls, a small looking-glass, and a bead necklace. The horse neighed three or four times, and I waited to hear some answers in a human voice, but I heard no other returns than in the same dialect, only one or two a little shriller than his. I began to think that this house must belong to some person of great note among them, because there appeared so much ceremony before I could gain admittance. But, that a man of quality should be served all by horses was beyond my comprehension : I feared my brain was disturbed by my sufferings and mis- fortunes : I roused myself, and looked about me in the room where I was left alone: this was furnished like the first, only after a more elegant manner. I rubbed my eyes often, but the same objects still occurred. I pinched my arms and sides to awake myself, hoping I might he in a dream. I then absolutely concluded, that all these appear- ances could* be nothing else but necromancy and magic. But I had no time to pursue these reflections, for tlie gray horse came to the door, and made me a sign to follow him into the third room, where I saw a very comely mare, to- gether with a colt and foal, sitting on' their haunches upon mats of straw, not unartfully made, and perfectly neat and clean. The mare soon after my entrance rose from her mat, and coming up close, after having nicely observed my hands and face, gave me a most contemptuous look, and 396 Gulliver's travels turning to the horse, I heard the word Yahoo often re- peated betwixt them; tlie meaning of which I could not then comprehend; although it. was the first I had learned to pronounce ; but I was soon better informed, to my ever- lasting mortification ; for the horse, beckoning to me with his head, and repeating the hhuun, hlmun, as he did upon the road, M'hich I understood was to attend him, led me out into a kind of court, where was another building, at some distance from the house. Here we entered, and I saw three of those detestable creatures, which I first met after my landing, feeding upon roots, and the flesh of some animals, which I afterwards found to be that of asses and dogs, and now and then a'cow, dead by accident or disease. They were all tied by the neck with strong withes fastened to a beam ; they held their food between the claws of their forefeet, and tore it with their teeth. The master horse ordered a sorrel nag, one of his servants, to untie th^ largest of these animals, and take him into the yard. The beast and I were brought close together, and our countenances diligently compared both by master and servant, who thereupon repeated several times the word Yahoo. My horror and astonishment are not to be described, when I observed, in this abominable animal, a perfect human figure : the face of it indeed ■^as flat and broad, the nose depressed, the lips large, and the mouth wide ; but these dififerences are common to all savage na- tions, where the lineaments of the countenance are dis- torted by the natives sufifering their infants to lie grovel- ling on the .earth, or by carrying them on their backs, nuzzling with their face against the mothei-'s shoulders. The forefoot of the Yahoo diflered from my hands in noth- ing else but the length of the nails, the coarseness and brownness of the palms, and the hairiness on the backs. A VOYAGE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 397 There was the same resemblance between our feet, with the same differences, which I knew very well, though the horses did not, because of my shoes and stockings; the same in every part of our bodies except as to hairiness and color, which I have already described. The great diiSculty that seemed to stick with the two horses, was to see the rest of my body so very different from that of a Yahoo, for which I was obliged to my clothfes, whereof they had no conception. The sorrel nag offered me a root, which he held (after their manner, as we shall describe in its proper place) between his hoof and pastern : I took it in my hand, and, having smelt it, re- turned it to bini again as civilly as I could. He brought out of the Yahoos' kennel a piece of ass's flesh, but it smelt so offensively that I turned from it with loathing : hie then threw it to the Yahoo, by whom it was greedily devoured. He afterwards showed me a wisp of hay, and a fetlock full of oats; but I shook my head, to signify that neither of these were food for me. And indeed I now apprehended that I must absolutely starve, if I did not get to some of my own species ; for as to those filthy Yahoos, although there were few greater lovers of mankind at that time than myself? yet I confess I never saw any sensitive being so detestable on all accounts ; and the more I came near them the more hateful they grew, while I stayed in that country. This the master horse observed by my behavior, and therefore sent the Yahoo back to his kennel. He then put his fore- hoof to his mouth, at which I was much surprised, although he did it with ease, afld with a motion that appeared per- fectly natural ; and made other signs to know what I would eat; but I could not return him such an answer as he was able to apprehend ; and if he had understood me, I did not see how it was possible to contrive any way for 398 Gulliver's travels: finding myself nourishment. While we were thus engaged, I observed a cow passing by, whereupon I pointed to her, and expressed a desire to go and milk her. This had its effect; for he led me back into the house, and ordered a mare-servant to open a room, where a good store of milk lay in earthen and wooden vessels, after a very orderly and cleanly manner. She gave me a large bowlful, of which I drank very heartily, and found myself well refreshed. About noon, I saw coming towards the house a kind of vehicle drawn like a sledge by four Yahoos. There was in it an old steed, who seemed to be of quality ; he alighted with his hind-feet forward, having by accident got a hurt in his left forefoot. He came to dine with our horse, who received him with great civility. They dined in the best room, and had oats boiled in milk for the second course, which the old horse eat warm, but the rest cold. Their mangers were placed circular in the middle of, the room, and divided into several partitions, round which they sat on their haunches, upon bosses of straw. In the middle was a large rack, with angles- answering to every partition of the manger ; so that each horse and mare eat their own hay, and their own mash of oats and milk, with much de- cency and regularity. The behavior of the young colt and foal appeared very modest, and that of the master and mis- tress extremely cheerful and complaisant to their guest. The gray ordered me to stand by him ; and much discourse passed between him and his friend concerning me, as I found by the stranger's often looking on me, and the fre- quent repetition of the word Yahoo. I happened to wear my ghjves, which the master gray observing, seemed perplexed, discovering signs of wonder what I had done to my forefeet: he put his hoof three or four times to them, as if he would signify that I should A VOYAGE TO THE H'OUYHNHNMS. 399 reduce them to their former shape, which I presently did, pulling off both my gloves, and putting them into my pocket. This occasioned further talk, and I saw the company was pleased with my behavior, whereof I soon found the good eifects. I was ordered to speak the few words I understood; and while they were at dinner, the master taught^ me the names for oats, milk, fire, water, and some others ; which I could readily pronounce after him, having from my youth a great facility in learning languages. When dinner was done, the master took me aside, and by signs and words made me understand the jconcern he was in that I had nothing to eat. Oats in their tongue are called hlunnh. This word I jironounced two or three times ; for although I had refused them at first, yet, upon second thoughts, I considered that I could contrive to make of them a kind of bread, which might be sufficient, with milk, to keep me alive, till I could make my escape to some other country, and to creatures of my own species. The horse immediately ordered a white mare-servant of his family to bring me a good quantity of oats in a sort of wooden tray. These I heated before the fire, as well as I could, and rubbed them till the husks came off, which I made a shift to winnow from the grain : I ground and beat them between two stones, then took water, and made them into a paste or cake, which I toasted at the fire, and eat warm with milk. It was at first a very insipid diet, though common enough in many parts of Europe, but grew tolerable by time ; and having been often reduced to hard fare in my life, this was not the first experiment I had made how easily nature is satisfied. And I cannot but observe, that I never had an hour's sickness while I stayed in this island. It is tru3, 1 sometimes made a shift 400 Gulliver's travels: to catch a rabbit or bird, by springes made of Yahoos^ hairs ; and I often gathered wholesome herbs, which I boiled and eat as salads with my bread; and now and then, for a rarity, I made a little butter, and drank the whey. I was at first at a great loss for salt, but custom soon rec- onciled me to the want of it ; and I am confident that the frequent use of salt among us is an effect of luxury, and was first introduced only as a provocative to drink, except where it is necessary for preserving flesh in long voyages, or in places remote from great markets : for we observe no animal to be fond of it but man,* and as to myself, when I left this country, it was a great while before I could endure the taste of it in anything that I ate. This is enough to say upon the subject of my diet, wherewith other travellers fill their books, as if the readers were personally concerned whether we fare well or ■ ill. However, it was necessary to mention this matter, lest the world should think it impossible that 1 could find sus- tenance for three years in such a country, and among such inhabitants. When it grew towards evening, the master horse ordered a place for me to lodge in ; it was but six yards from the house, and separated from the stable of the Yahoos. Here I got some straw, and covering myself with my own clothes, slept very sound. But I was in a short time better accom- modated, as the reader shall know hereafter, when I come to treat more particularly about my way of living. * This is a great mistake. Almost every animal is fond of salt, and thrives when it is mingled with its food. The fattening quality of salt marshes, and the delight taken hy animals in licking salt sand, is well known. It has been sprinkled upon musty hay, with such ad- vantage as to render it highly palatable to the animals which before refused it. A VOYAGE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 401 CHAPTER III. THE AUTHOR STUDIES TO LEARN THE LANGUAGE — THE HOTJYHNHNM, HIS MASTER, ASSISTS IN TEACHING HIM — THE LANGUAGE DE- SCRIBED — SEVKEAL HOUYHNHNMS OF QUALITY COME OUT OF CURIOSITY TO SEE THE AUTHOR — HE GIVES HIS MASTER A SHORT ACCOUNT OF HIS VOYAGE. Y principal endeavor was to learn the language, ^vhich my master (for so I shall henceforth call him), and his children', and every servant of his house, were desirous to teach me; for they looked upon it as a prodigy, that a brute animal should discover such marks of a rational creature. I pointed to everything, and inquired the name of it, which I wrote down in my journal-book when I was alone, and corrected my bad accent, by desiring those of the family to pronounce it often. In this employment a sorrel nag, one of the under servants, was very ready to assist me. In speaking, they pronounce through the nose and throat, and their language approaches nearest to the High Dutch or German, of any I know in Europe ; but it is much more graceful and significant. The emperor Charles V made almost the same observation when he said, " that if he were to speak to his horse, it should be in High Dutch." The curiosity and impatience of my master were so great that he spent many hours of his leisure to instruct me. He was convinced (as he afterwards told me) that I must be a Yahoo; but my teachableness, civility, and cleanliness, 26 402 Gulliver's travels: astonished him ; which were qualities altogether opposite to those animals.* He was most perplexed about my clothes, reasoning sometimes with himself, whether thej' were a part of my body : for I never pulled them off till the family were asleep, and got them on before they waked in the morning. My master was eager to learn " whence I came ; how I acquired those appearances of reason which I discovered in all my actions; and to know my story from my own mouth, which he hoped he should soon do, by the great proficiency I made in learning and pronouncing their words and sentences." To help my memory, I formed all I learned into the English alphabet, and writ the words down, with the" translations. This last, after some time, I ventured to do in my master's presence. It cost me much trouble to explain to hira what I was doing ; for the in- habitants have not the least idea of books or literature. In about ten weeks' time I was able to understand most of his questions; and in three months could give him some tolerable answers. He was extremely curious to know " from what part of the country I came, and how I was taught to imitate a rational creature ; because the Yahoos (whom he saw I exactly resembled in my head, hands and face, that were only visible),t with some appearance of cunning, and the strongest disposition to mischief, were observed to be the most unteachable of all brutes." I answered, " that I came over the sea from a far place, with many others of my own kind, in a great hollow vessel made of the bodies of trees ; that my companions forced me to * " Qaalities opposite to animals," is a strange mode of expression ; it should be — "which were qualities altogether opposite to such as belonged to those animals." — Sheridan. f " That were only visible" — an ambiguous phrase; it should be. — " which only were visible," ctn.^Sheridmi. A VOYAGE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS 403 land on this coast, and then left me to shift for myself." It was with some difficulty, and by the help of many signs, that I brought him to understand me. He replied, " that I must needs be mistaken, or that I said the thing which was not ;" for they have no word in their language to ex- press lying or falsehood. "He knew it was impossible that there could be a country beyond the sea, or that a parcel of brutes could move a wooden vessel whither they pleased upon water. He was sure no Houyhnhnm alive could make such a vessel, nor would trust Yahoos to man- age it." The word Houyhnhnm, in their tongue, signifies a horse, and, in its etymology, the perfection of nature. I told my' master that " I was at a loss for expression, but would improve as fast as I could ; and hoped in a short time I should be able to tell him wonders." He was pleased to direct his own mare, his colt, and foal, and the servants of the family, to take all opportunities of instructing me; and every day or two, for two or three hours, he was at the same pains himself; several horses and mares of quality in the neighborhood came often to our house, upon the re- port spread of " a wonderful Yahoo, that could speak like a Howyhnhnm, and seemed in his words and actions to dis- __ cover some glimmerings of reason." These delighted to converse with me : they put many questions and received such answers as I was able to return. By all these advan- tages I made so great a progress, that in five months from my arrival, I understood whatever was spoken, and could express myself tolerably well. The Houyhnhnms, who cam^ to visit my master out of a design of seeing and talking with me, could hardly be- lieve roe to be a right Yahoo, because my body had a differ- ent covering from others of ray kind. They were astonished 404 Gulliver's travels: to observe me without the usual hair or skin, except on my head, face, and hands ; but I discovered that secret to my master upon an accident which happened about a fortnight Defore. I have already told the reader, that every night, when the family were gone to bed, it was my custom to strip, and cover myself with my clothes : it happened one morning early, that my master sent for me by the sorrel nag, who was his valet; wlien he came I was fast asleep, my clothes fallen off on one side, and my shirt above my waist. I awaked at the noise he made, and observed him to deliver his message in some disorder; after which he went to my master, and in a great fright gave him a very confused ac- count of what he had seen: this I presently discovered; for, going as soon as I was dressed to pay my attendance upon his honor, he asked me " the meaning of what liis servant had reported, that I was not the same thing when I slept, as I appeared to be at other times ; that bis valet assured him some part of me was white, some yellow, at least not so white, and some brown." I had hitherto concealed the secret of my dress, in order to distinguish myself as much as possible from that cursed race of Yahoos ; but now I found it in vain to do so any longer. Besides, I considered that ray clothes and shoes would soon wear out, which already were in a declining condition, and must be supplied by some contrivance from the hides of Yahoos, or other brutes ; whereby the whole secret would be known. I therefore told my master, "that in the country whence I came, those of my kind always covered their bodies with the hairs of certain animals pre- pared by art, as well for decency as to avoid the inclemen- cies of air, both hot and cold; of which, as to my own person, I would give him immediate conviction, if lie A Voyage lo the houyhnhnms. 405 pleased to command me : only desiring his excuse, if I did not expose those parts that nature taught us to conceal.'^ He said, " my discourse was all very strange, but especially the last part ; for he could not understand, why nature should teach us to conceal what nature had given ; that neither himself nor family were ashamed of any part of their bodies; but, however, I might do as I pleased." Whereupon I first unbuttoned my coat, and pulled it off. I did the same with my waistcoat. I drew off my shoes, stockings, and breeches. I let ray shirt down to my waist, and drew up the bottom, fastening it like a girdle about my middle to hide my nakedness. My master observed the whole performance with great signs of curiosity and admiration. He took up all my clothes in his pastern, one piece after another, and examined them diligently; he then stroked my body very gently, and looked round me several times ; after which, he said, it was plain I must be a perfect Yahoo ; but that I differed very much from the rest of my species, in the softness, whiteness, and smoothness of my skin ; my want of hair on several parte of my body ; the shape and shortness of my claws behind and before ; and my affectation of walk- ing continually on my two hinder feet. He desired to see no more; and gave me leave to put on my clothes again, for I was shuddering with cold. I expressed my uneasiness at his giving me so often the appellation of Yahoo, an odious animal, for which I had so utter a hatred and contempt : I begged he would forbear applying that word to me, and make the same order in his family and among his friends whom he suffered to see me. I requested likewise, " that the secret of my having a false covering to my body might be known to none but himself, at least as long as my present clothing should last ; for, as 406 gOlliver's travels t to what the sorrel nag, his valet, had observed, his honor might command him to conceal it." All this my master very graciously consented to, and thus the secret was kept till my clothes began to wear out, which I was forced to supply by several contrivances that shall hereafter be mentioned. In the meantime, he desired " I would go on with my utmost diligence to learn their lan- guage, because he was more astonished at my capacity for speech and reason, than at the figure of my body, whether it was covered or not," adding, " that he waited with some impatience to hear the wonders which I promised to tell him." Thenceforward he doubled the pains he had been at to instruct me : he brought me into all company, and made them treat me with civility; "because," as he told them privately, "this would put me into good humor, and make me more diverting." Every day, when I waited on him, beside the trouble he was at in teaching, he would ask me several questions con- cerning myself, which I answered as well as I could ; and by these means he had already received some general ideas, though very imperfect. It would be tedious to relate the several steps by which I advanced to a more regular con- versation : but the first account I gave of myself in any order and length was to this purpose. " That I came from a very far country, as I already had attempted to tell him, with about fifty more of my own species ; that we travelled upon the seas in a great hollow vessel made of wood, and larger than his honor's house. I described the ship to him in the best terms I could, and explained, by the help of my handkerchief displayed, how it was driven forward by the wind. That upon a quarrel among us, I was set on shore on this coast, where I walked A VOYAGE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 40? forwartl, without knowing whither, till he delivered me from the persecution of those execrable Yahoos." He asked me, " who made the ship, and how it was possible that the Houylinhnms of, my country would leave it to the manage- ment of brutes." My answer was, " that I durst proceed no farther in my relation, unless he would give me his word and honor that he would not be offended, and then I would tell him the wonders I had so often promised." He agreed ; and I went on by assuring him, "that the ship was made by creatures like myself; who, in all the countries I had trav- elled, as well as in my own, were the only governing rational animals; and that upon my arrival hither,* I was as much astonished to see the Hbuyhnhnms act like rational beings, as he, or his friends, could be, in finding some marks of reason in a creature he was pleased to call a Yahoo; to which I owned my resemblance in every part, but could not account for their degenerate and brutal nature." I said farther, "that if good fortune ever restored me to my native country, to relate my travels hither, as I resolved to do, everybody would believe, that I said the thing that was not, that I invented the story out of my own head ; and — with all possible respect to himself, his family, and friends, and under his promise of not being offended — our countrymen would hardly think it probable that a Houyhnhnm should be the presiding creature of a nation, and a Yahoo the brute." * It should be — "upon my arrival here," not "arrival hither," which is not English. — Sheridan. 408 &0llivbr's travels CHAPTEE IV. THE HOUYHNHNM's NOTION OP TRUTH AND FALSEHOOD — THE AU- THOR'S DISCOURSE DISAPPKOTED BY HIS MASTER — THE AUTHOR GIVES A MORE PARTICULAR ACCOUNT OP HIMSELF, AND THE ACCIDENTS OP HIS VOYAGE. jlY master heard me with great appearances of un- easiness in his countenance; because doubting, or not believing, are so little known in this country, that the inhabitants cannot tell how to behave themselves under such circumstances ; and I re- member, in frequent discourses with my master concerning the nature of manhood in other parts of the world, having occasion to talk of lying and false representation, it was with much difficulty that he comprehended what I meant, although he had otherwise a most acute judgment; for he argued thus : " that the use of speech was to make us under- stand one another, and to receive information of facts ; now, if any one said the thing which was not, these ends were defeated, because I cannot properly be said to understand him ; and I am so far from receiving information, that he leaves me worse than in ignorance ; for I am led to believe a thing black, when it is white, and short, when it is long." And these were all the notions he had concerning that faculty of lying, so perfectly well understood, and so uni- versally practiced, among human creatures. To return from this digression. When I asserted that theYahoos were the only governing animals in my country. A VOYAG-E TO THE HOtJYHNHNMS. 409 whicli my master said was altogether past his conception, he desired to know, "whether we had Houyhnhnms among us, and what was their employment?" I told him, "we had great numbers; that in summer they grazed in the fields, and in winter were kept in houses with hay and oats, where Yahoo servants were employed to rub their skins smooth, comb their manes, pick their feet, serve them with food, and make their beds." "I understand you well," said my master; "it is very plain, from all you have spoken, that whatever share of reason the Yahoos pretend to, the Houyhnhmns are your masters ; I heartily wish our Yahoos would be so tractable." I begged " his honor would please excuse me from proceeding any further be- cause I was'very certain that the account he expected from me would be highly displeasing." But he insisted in com- manding* me to let him know the best and the worst. I told him "he should be obeyed." I owned "that the Houyhnhwms among us, whom we called horses, were the most generous and comely animals we had ; that they ex- celled in strength and swiftness ; and when they belonged to persons of quality, were employed in travelling, racing, or drawing chariots; they were treated with much kind- ness and care, till they fell into diseases, or became foun- dered in the feet; but then they were sold, and used to ail kind of drudgery till they died; after which their skins were stripped, and sold for what they were worth, and their bodies left to be devoured by dogs and birds of prey. But the common race of horses had not so good fortune, being kept by farmers and carriers; and other mean people, who put them to greater labor, and fed them worse." * " Insisted in commanding," is not English ; it should be, " per- sisted in commanding," etc. — Sheridan. 410 I described, as well as I could, our way of riding; the shape and use of a bridle, a saddle, a spur, and a whip; of harness and wheels. I added, "that we fastened plates of a certain hard substance, called iron, at the bottom of their feet, to preserve their hoofs from being broken by the stony ways on which we often travelled." "My master, after some expressions of great indignation, wondered " how we dared to venture upon a Houyhnhnm's back ; for he was sure, that the weakest servant in his house would be able to shake off the strongest Yahoo ; or by lying down, or rolling on his back, squeeze the brute to death." I answered, " that our horses were trained up, from three or four years old, to the several uses we intended them for ; that if any of them proved intolerably vicious, they were employed for carriages ; that they were severely beaten, while they wereyoung, for any mischievous tricks: that the males, designed for the common use of riding or draught, were generally castrated about two years after their birth, to take down their spirits, and make them more tame and gentle; that they were indeed sensible of rewards and pun- ishments : but his honor would please to cxjusider, that they had not the least tincture of reason, any more than the Yahoos in this countrJ^" It put me to the pains of many circumlocutions, to give my master a right idea of what I spoke; for their language does not abound in a variety of words, because their wants and passions ai'e fewer than among us. But it is impossi- ble to express his noble resentment at our savage treatment of the Houyhnh^m race ; particularly afler I had explained the manner and use of castrating horses among us, to hinder them from propagating their kind, and to render them more servile. He said, " if it were possible there could be anv country where Yahoos alone were endueractice the last of these methods ; because such zealots prove always the most ob- 430 GULLIVER'S travels: seqiiious and subservient to the will and passions of their master. That these ministers, having all employments at their disposal, preserve themselves in power, by bribing the majority of a senate or great council; and at last, by an expedient, called an act of indemnity (whereof I described the nature to him), they secui'O themselves from after reck- onings, and retire from the public laden with the spoils of the nation. " The palace of a chief minister is a seminary to breed up others in his own trade; the pages, lackeys, and porter, by imitating their master, become ministers of state in their several districts, and learn to excel in the three principal ingredients, of insolence, lying, and bribery. Accordingly, they have a subaltern court paid to them by persons of the best rank; and sometimes, by the force of dexterity and impudence, arrive, througli several gradations, to be suc- cessors to their lord. " He is usually governed by a decayed wench, or favorite footman, who are the tunnels through which all graces are conveyed, and may properly be called in the last resort, the governors of the kingdom." One day in discourse, my master, having heard me men- tion the nobility of my country, was pleased to make me a compliment which I could not pretend to deserve ; "that he was sure I must have been born of some noble family, because I far exceeded in shape, color, and cleanliness, all the Yahoos of his nation, although I seemed t© fail in strength and agility, wliich must be im]mted to my different way of living from those other brutcj* ; and besides, I was not only endowed with the faculty of spcccli, but likewise with some rudiments of reason, to a do!j;rce that with all his acquaintance I passed for a prodigy." He made me observe, "that among the Houyhnhnms, the A VOYAGE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 431 white, the sorrel, and the iron-gray, were not so exactly shaped as the bay, the dapple-gray, and the black ; nor born with equal talents of mind, or a capacity to improve them; and therefore continued always in the condition of servants, without ever aspiring to match out of their own race, which in that country would be reckoned monstrous and unnatural." I made his honor my most humble acknowledgments for the good opinion he was pleased to conceive of me; but assured him, at the same time, that my birth was of the lower sort, having been born of plain, honest parents, who were just able to give me a tolerable education : that no- bility, among us, was altogether a different thing from the idea he had of it : that our young noblemen are bred from their childhood in idleness and luxury; that, as soon as years will permit, they consume their vigor, and contract odious diseases among lewd females ; and when their for- tunes are almost ruined, they marry some woman of mean birth, disagreeable jjcrson, and unsound constitution (merely for the sake of money), whom they hate aud despise. That the productions of such marriages are generally scrofulous, rickety, or deformed children : by which means the family seldom continues above three generations, unless the wife takes care to provide a healthy father, among her neigh- bors or domestics, in order to improve and continue the breeds : that a weak diseased body, a meagre countenance, and sallow complexion, are the true marks of noble blood : and a healtiiy, robust appearance is so disgraceful in a man of quality, that the world concludes his real fatlier to have been a groom or a coachman. The imperfections of his mind run parallel with those of his body, being a compo- sitipn of spleen, dulness, ignorance, caprice, sensuality, and pride. 432 GULLIVER'S TEAVELS: " Without the con.sent of this illustrious body, no law can be enacted, repealed, or altered; and these nobles have likewise the decision of all our possessions, without ap- peal."* * Dr. Young relates that Lord Bolingbroke's father said to him on his being made a lord, " Ah, Harry I I ever said you would be hanged, but now I find you will be beheaded." A VOYAdE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 433 CHAPTER YII. f THE AUTHOR'S GREAT LOVE OF HIS NATIVE COUNTRY — HIS MASTER'S OBSERVATIONS UPON THE CONSTITUTION AND ADMINISTRATION OF ENGLAND, AS DESCRIBED BY THE AUTHOR, WITH PARALLEL CASES AND COMPARISONS — HIS MASTER'S OBSERVATIONS UPON HUMAN NATURE. "lET the reader not wonder how I could prevail on myself to give so free a representation of my own species, among a race of mortals who are already too apt to conceive the vilest opinion of human kind, from that entire congruity between me and their Yahoos. But I must freely confess, that the many virtues of those excellent quadrupeds, placed in opposite view to human corruptions, had so far opened my eyes and enlarged my understanding, that I began to view the actions and passions of man in a very different light, and to think the honor of my own kind not worth managing ; which, besides, it was impossible for me to do, before a person of so acute a judgment as my master, w'ho daily convinced me of a thousand faults in myself, whereof I had not the leant perception before, and which, with Us, would never be num- bered even amonghuman infirmities. I had likewise learned, from his example, an utter detestation of all falsehood or disguise ; and truth appeared so amiable to me, that I de- termined upon sacrificing everything to it. Let me deal so candidly with the reader as to confess that there was yet a much stronger motive for the freedom I 2§ iSi GULLIVER'S TKAVELS: took in my representation of things. I had not yet been a year in this country befor^ I contracted such a love and veVi- eration for the inhabitants, that I entered on a firm resolu- tion never to return to human kind, but to pass the rest of my life among these admirable Houyhnhnms, in the con- templation and practice of every virtue ; where I could have no example or incitement to vice. But it was decreed by fortune, my perpetual enemy, that so great a felicity should not fall to my share. However, it is now some comfort to reflect, that in what I said of my countrymen, I exten- uated their faults as much as I durst before so strict an ex- aminer ; and upon every article gave as favorable a turn as the matter would bear. For, indeed, who is there alive that*will not be swayed by his bias and partiality to the place of his birth ? I have related the substance of several conversations I had with my master, during the greatest part of the time I had the honor to be in his service ; but have, indeed, for brevity sake, omitted much more than is here set down. When I had answered all his questions, and his curiosity seemed to be fully satisfied, he sent for me one morning early, and commanded me to sit down at some distance (an honor which he had never before conferred upon me). He said, " he had been very seriously considering my whole story, as far as it related both to myself and to my country ; that he looked upon us as a sort of animals, to whose share, by what accident he could not conjecture, some small pit- ,tance of reason had fallen, whereof we made no other use than by its assistance to aggravate our natural corruptions, and to acquire new ones, which nature had not given us ; that we disarmed ourselves of the few abilities she had be- stowed ; had been very successful in multiplying our orit^i- ual wants, and seemed to spend our w'lole lives ia vain A VOYAGE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 435 endeavors to supply them by our own inventions. That as to myself, it was manifest I had neither the strength nor the agility of a common Yahoo; that I walked infirmly on my hinder feet ; had found out a contrivance to make my claws of no use or defence, and to remove the hair from my chin, which was intended as a shelter from the sun and the weather. Lastly, that I could neither run with speed, nor climb trees like my brethren," as he called them, " the Yahoos in his country." "That our institutions of government and law were plainly owing to our gross defects in reason, and by con- sequence in virtue; because reason alone is sufficient to govern a rational creature; which was therefore a character we had no pretence to challenge, even from the account I had given of my own people; although he manifestly per- ceived that, in order to favor them, I had concealed many particulars, and often said the thing which was not. "He was the more confirmed in this opinion, because he observed, that as I agreed in every feature of my body with other Yahoos, except where it was to my real disad- vantage in point of strength, speed, and activity, the short- ness of my claws, and some particulars where nature had no part ; so from the representation I had given him of our lives, our manners, and our actions, he found as near a resemblance in the disposition of our minds." He said, " the Yahoos were known to hate one another more than they did any different species of animals; and the reason usually assigned was, the odionsness of their own shapes, which all could see in the rest, but not in themselves. He had therefore begun to think it not unwise in us to cover our bodies, and by that invention conceal many of our de- formities from each other, which would else be hardly sup- portable. But he now found he had been mistaken, and t36 GULLIVER'S travels: that the dissensions of those brutes in his country were 'jwing to the same cause with ours, as I had described them. For if," said he, "you throw among five Yahoos as much food as would be sufficient for fifty, they will, instead of eating peaceably, fall together by the ears, each single one impatient to have all to itself; and therefore a servant was usually employed to stand by while they were feeding abroad, and those kept at home were tied at a distance from each other ; that if a cow died of age or accident, before a Houyhnhnm could secure it for his own Yahoos, those in the nciy-hborhood would come in herds to seize it, and then would ensue such a battle as I had described, with terrible wounds made by their claws on both sides, al- though they seldom were able to kill one another for want of such convenient instruments of death as we had in- vented. At other times, the like battles have been fought between the Yahoos of several neighborhoods, without any visible cause ; those of one district watching all opportu- nities to surprise the next before they are prepared. But if they find their project has miscarried, they return home, and, for want of enemies, engage in what I call a civil war among themselves. "That in some fields of his country, there are certain shining stones of several colors, whereof the Yahoos are violently fond ; and when part of these stones is fixed in the earth, as it sometimes happens, they will dig with their claws for whole days to get them out, then carry them away and hide them by heaps in their kennels; but still looking round with great caution, for fear their comrades should find out their treasure." My master said, " he could never discover the reason of this unnat- ural appetite, or how these stones could be of any use to a Yahoo; but now he believed it migiit proceed from the A VOYAGE TO THE HOUYHUHNMS. 437 same principle of avarice which I had ascribed to mankind. That he had once, by way of experiment, privately re- moved a heap of these stones from the place where one of his Yahoos had buried it; whereupon the sordid animal, missing his treasure, by his loud lamenting brought the whole herd to the place, there miserably howled, and then fell to biting and tearing the rest ; began to pine away ; would neither eat nor sleep, nor work, till he ordered a ser- vant privately to convey the stones into the same hole, and hide them as- before; which, when his Yahoo had found, he presently recovered his spirits and good humor, but took good care to remove them to a better hiding-place, and has ever since been a very serviceable brute." My master further assured me, which I also observed myself, " that in the fields where the shining stones abound, the fiercest and most frequent battles are fought, occasioned by perpetual inroads of the neighboring Yahoos." He said, " it was common, when two Yahoos discovered such a stone in a field, and were contending which of them should be the proprietor, a.third would take the advantage and carry it away from them both ;" which my master would needs contend to have some kind of resemblance with our suits at law; wherein I thought it for our credit not to undeceive him ; since the decision he mentioned was much more equitable than many decrees among us ; because the plaintiff and defendant there lost nothing beside the stone they contended for : whereas our courts of equity would never have dismissed the cause while either of them had anything left. My master, continuing his discourse, said, " there was nothing that rendered the Yahoos more odious than their undistinguishing appetite to devour everything that came in their way, whether herbs, roots, berries, the corrupted 438 Cutlliver's travels: flesh of animals, or all mingled together: and it was pecu- liar in their temper, that they were fonder of what they conld get by rapine or stealth at a greater distance, than much better food provided for them at home. If their prey held out, they would eat till they were ready to burst; after which, nature had pointed out to them a certain root that gave them a general evacuation. "There was also another kind of root, very juicy, but somewhat rare and difficult to be found, which the Yahoos sought for with much eagerness, and would suck it with great delight; it produced in them the same effects that wine has upon us. It would make them sometimes hug, and sometimes tear one another; they would howl, and grin, and chatter, and reel, and tumble, and then fell asleep in the mud." I did indeed observe that the Yahoos were the only ani- mals in the country subject to any diseases ; which, how- ever, were much fewer than horses have among us, and contracted not by any ill treatment they meet with, but by the nastiness and greediness of that sordid brute. Neither has their language any more than a general appellation for those maladies, which is borrowed from the name of the beast, and called hnea yahoo, or Yahoo's evil; and the cure prescribed is a mixture of their own dung and urine, forci- bly put down the Yahoo's throat. This I have since often known to have been taken with success, and do here freely recommend it to my countrymen, for the public good, as an admirable specific against all diseases produced by reple- tion. " As to learning, government, arts, manufactures, and the like," my master confessed, " he could find little or no resemblance between the Yahoos of that country and those in ours. For he only meant to observe what parity there A VorAaE TO THE ilOtJYHNHNMS. 439 was in our natures. He had heard, indeed, some curious Houyhnhnms observe, that in most herds there was a sort of ruling Yahoo (as among us there is generally some lead,- ing or principal stag in a parlt), who was always more de- formed in body and mischievous in disposition than any of the rest. That this leader had usually a favorite, as like himself as he could get, whose employment was to lick his master's feet and posteriors, and drive the female Yahoos to his kennel ;* for which he was now and then rewarded with a piece of ass's flesh. This favorite is hated by the whole herd, and therefore, to protect himself, keeps always near the person of his leader. He usually continues in office till a worse can be found; but the very moment he is discarded, his successor, at the head of all the Yahoos in that district, young and old, male and female, come in a body,t and discharge their excrements upon him from head to foot. But how far this might be applicable to our courts, and favorites, and ministers of state, my master said I could best determine." r durst make no return to this malicious insinuation, which debased human understanding below the sagacity of a common hound, who has judgment enough to distinguish and follow the cry of the ablest dog in the pack, without being ever mistaken. My master told me, "there were some qualities remark- able in the Yahoos, which he had not observed me to men- tion, or at least very slightly, in the accounts I had given * Flattery and pimping. — Hawkesworth. f This senteiico is altogether ungrammatical : " his successor " is the only nominative to the plural verb "come;" it may be thus iimended, — "but the very moment he is discarded, all the Yalioos in that district, young and old, male and female, with his successor at their head, come in a body," etc. — Sheridan. 440 GULLIVER'S travels: him of humankind." He said, "those animals, like other brutes, had their females in common ; but in tiiis they dif- fered, that the she Yahoo would admit the males while she was pregnant ; and that the males would quarrel and fight with the females, as fiercely as with each other ; both which practices were such degrees of infamous brutality, as no other sensitive creature ever arrived at. "Another thing he wondered at in the Yahoos, y^as their strange disposition to nastiness and dirt ; whereas there ap- peal's to be a natural love of cleanliness in all other animals." As to the two former accusations, I was glad to let them pass without any reply, because I had not a word to oifer upon them in defence of my species, which otherwise I cer- tainly had done from my own inclinations. But I could have easily vindicated humankind from the imputation of singularity upon the last article, if there had been any swine in that country (as unluckily for me there were not), which although it may be a sweeter quadruped than a Yahoo, cannot, I humbly conceive, in justice, pretend to more clean- liness; and so his honor himself must have owned, if he had seen their filthy way of feeding, and their custom of wallowing and sleeping in the mud. My master likewise mentioned another quality, which his servants had discovered in several Yahoos, and to him was wholly unaccountable. He said, "a fancy would some- times take a Yahoo to retire into a corner, to lie down, and howl, and groan, and spurn away all that came near hi in, although he were young and fat, wanted neither food nor water, nor did the servant imagine what could possibly ail liira. And the only remedy they found was, to set him to hard work, after which he would infallibly come to him- self." To this I was silent out of partiality to my own kind ; yet here I could plainly discover the true seeds of A VOYAGE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 441 spleen, which only seizes on the lazy, the luxurious, and the rich ; who,* if they were forced to undergo the same regimen, I would undertake for the cure. His honor had farther observed, " that a female Yahoo would often stand behind a bank or a bush, to gaze on the young males passing by, and then appear and hide, using many antic gestures and grimaces, at which time it was ob- served that she had a most offensive smell ; and when any of the males advanced, would slowly retire, looking often back, and with a counterfeit show of fear, run off into some convenient place, where she knew the male would follow her. " At other times, if a female stranger came among them, three or four of her own sex would get about her, and stare, and chatter, and grin, and smell her all over; and then turn off with gestures, that seemed to express con- tempt and disdain." Perhaps my master might refine a little in these specu- lations, which he had drawn from what he observed him- self, or had been told him by others; however, I could not reflect without some amazement, and much sorrow, that the rudiments of lewdness, coquetry, censnre, and scandal, should have place by instinct in womankind. I expected every moment that my master would accuse the Yahoos of those unnatural appetites in both sexes, so common among us. But Nature, it seems, has not been so expert a school-mistress ; and these politer pleasures are entirely the productions of art and reason on our side of the globe, t 4 ^ — ^ — . * Here the word " who," is a nominative without reference to any verb afterward. — Sheridan. ■f The Duehess-dowager of Mariborough forgot her ancient hatred of Swift when she found him a sharer in her misanthropy. In her pub- lished opinions, under the head 1736, she says, "Dean Swift gives the most exact account of kings, ministers, bishops, and courts of justice, 442 GULLIVER *S TRAVELS: that i? possible to bo writ. He has certainly a vast deal of wit ; and since he could contribute so much to pulling down the most honest and best-intenlioned ministry that I ever knew (Queen Anne's Whig administration), with the help only of Abigail (Mrs. Masham), and one or two more, and has certainly stopped the finishing stroke to ruin the Irish in the project of the halfpence, in spiteof all the min- istry could do, I cannot help wishing that we had had his assistance in the opposition ; for I could easily forgive him all the slaps he has given me and the Duke of Marlborough, and have thanked him heartily whenever he pleased to do good. I never saw him in my life; and though his writings have entertained me very much, yet I see he writes sometimes for interest, for in his books, he gives my Lord of Oxford so great a character as if he was speaking of Socrates or Marcus Antoninus. But when I am dead, the reverse of that character will come out, with vouchers to it under his own hand." (The Duchess was a true prophetess, as appears from Swift's Notes on Macky, which we have given in the Appendixto Lilliput ) Again, under the same head, she says, "The style of the lords'^ address puts me in mind of Dean Swift's account, who I am pro- digiously fond of, which he gives of the manner in which he was in- troduced to the King of Luggnagg." And again she records, " I most heartily wish that in this park I had some af the breed of those charming creatures Swift speaks of, and calls the Houyhnhnms, which I understand to be horses, so extremely polite, and which had all manner of good conversation, good principles, and that never told a lie, and charmed him so, that he could not endure his own country when he returned. He says there is a sort of creature there called Yahoo, and of the same species with us, only a great deal uglier ; but they are kept tied up ; and by that glorious creature the horse, are not permitted to do any mischief; I really have not been pleased so much a long time as with what he writes." Another point of union between Swift and the Duchess was their common hatred of Sir Robert Walpole. In 1735, she writes, "The chief must have great talents, or he could not have compassed what he has. But I do really believe that there never was any instance in any government of so much brutality, ill principles, and folly. But which way any of -these things can be changed I cannot yet see into." In 1739, after a lung account of some illness which Walpole had, she adds, "I think it is thought a fault to wish anybody dead, but I hope it is none to wish he might be hanged, having brought to ruin so great a country as this might have been." A VOYAGE TO I'lIH HOUYHNHNMS. 443 r> CHAPTER VIII. THE AUTHOR KELATES SEVERAL PARTICULARS 01? THE YAHOOS THE GREAT VIRTUES OE THE HOUYHNHNMS — THE EDUCATION AND EXERCISE OP THEIR YOUTH — THEIR GENERAL ASSEMBLY. ^JUDGING that I ought to have understood human nature much better than I supposed it possible for my mastef to do, it was easy to apply the character he gave of the Yahoos to myself and my countrymen ; and I believed I could yet make farther discoveries, from my own observation. I therefore often begged his honor to let me go among the herds of Yahoos in the neighborhood; to which he always very graciously consented, being perfectly convinced that the hatred I bore these brutes would never suffer me to be corrupted by thcoi ; and his honor ordered one of his servants, a strong sorrel nag, very honest and goodnatured, to be my guard ; with- out whose protection I durst not undertake such adventures. For I have already told the reader how much I was pes- tered by these odious animals, upon my first arrival ; and I afterward failed very narrowly three or four times of fall- ing into their clutches, when I happened to stray at any distance without my hanger. And I have reason to be- lieve they had some imagination that I was of their own species, which I often assisted myself by stripping up my sleeves, and showing my naked arms and breasts in their sight, when my protector was with me. At which times 444 Gulliver's travels: they would approach as near as they durst, and imitate my actions after the manner of monkeys, but ever with great signs of hatred ; as a tame jackdaw with cap and stockings is always persecuted by the wild ones, when he happens to be got among them. They are prodigiously nimble from their infancy. How- ever, I once caught a young male of three years old, and endeavored, by all marks of tenderness, to make it quiet; but the little imp fell a squalling, and scratching, and bit- ing with such violence, that I was forced to let it go ; and it was high time, for a whole troop of old ones came about us at the noise, but finding the cub was safe (for away it ran), and my sorrel nag being by, they durst not venture near us. I observed the young animal's flesh to smell very rank, and the stink was somewhat between a weasel and a fox, but much more disagreeable. I forgot another cir- cumstance (and perhaps I might have the reader's pardon if it were wholly omitted), that while I held the odious vermin in my hands, it voided its filthy excrements of a yellow liquid substance all over my clothes ; but by good fortune there was a small brook hard by, where I washed myself as clean as I could ; although I durst not come into my master's presence until I was sufficiently aired. By what I could discover, the Yahoos appear to be the most unteachable of all animals : their capacities never reaching higher than to draw or carry burdens. Yet I am of opinion, this defect arises chiefly from a perverse, restiff" disposition. For they are cunning, malicious, treacherous, and revengeful. They are strong and hardy, but of a cowardly spirit, and by consequence insolent, abject, and cruel. It is observed, that the red-haired of both sexes are more libidinous and mischievous than the rest, whom yet they much exceed in strength and activity. A VOYAGE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 445 The Houyhnhnms keep the Yahoos for present use in huts not far from the house; but the rest are sent abroad to certain fields, where they dig up roots, eat several kinds of herbs, and search about for carrion, or sometimes catch weasels and luhimuhs (a sort of wild rat), which they greed- ily devour. Nature has taught them to dig deep holes with their nails on the side of a rising ground, wherein they lie by themselves ; only the kennels of the females are larger, sufficient to hold two or three cubs. They swim from their infancy like frogs, and are able to continue long under water, where they often take fish, which the females carry home to their young. And, upon this occasion, I hope the reader will pardon my relating an odd adventure. Being one day abroad with my protector the sorrel nag, and tlie weather exceeding hot, I entreated him to let me bathe in a river that was near. He consented, and I im- mediately stripped myself stark naked, and went down softly into the stream. It happened that a young female Yahoo standing behind a bank, saw the whole proceeding, and inflamed by desire, as the nag and I conjectured, came running with all speed, and leaped into the water within five yards of the place where I bathed. I was never in my life so terribly frightened. The nag was grazing at some distance, hot suspecting any harm. She embraced me after a most fulsome manner. I roared as loud as I could, and the nag came galloping towards me, whereupon she quitted her grasp, with the utmost reluctancy, and leaped upon the opposite bank, where she stood gazing and howling all the time I was putting on my clothes. This was a v matter of diversion to my master and his family, as well as of mortification to myself. For now I could no longer deny that I was a real Yahoo, in every limb 4-16 GULLIVER'S TRAVELS - and feature, since the females had a natural propensity to me/ as one of their own species; neither was the hair of this brute of a red color (which might have been some ex- cuse for an appetite a little irregular), but black as a sloe, and her countenance did not make an appearance altogether so hideous as the rest of her kind; for I think she could not be above eleven years old. Having lived three years in this country, the reader, I suppose, will expect that I sliould, like other travellers, give him some account of the manners and customs of its inhabitants, which it was, indeed, my principal study to learn. As these noble Houyhnhnms are endowed by nature with a general disposition to all virtues, and have no conceptions or ideas of what is evil in a rational creature ; so their grand maxim is, to cultivate reason, and to be wholly governed by it. Neither is reason among them a point problematical, as with us, where men can argue with plausibility on both sides of the question ; Tjut strikes you with immediate con- viction ; as it must needs do, where it is not mingled, ob- scured, or discolored, by passion and interest. I remem- ber it was with extreme difficulty that I could bring my master to understand the meaning of the word opinion, or how a point could be disputable ; because reason taught us to affirm or deny only ^vhere we are certain ; and beyond our knowledge we cannot do either. So that controversies, wranglings, disputes, and positiveness, in false or dubious propositions, are evils unknown among the Houyhnhnms. In the like mannei', when I used to explain to him our several systems of natural philosophy, he would laugh, " that a creature pretending to reason, should value itself u])on the knowledge of other people's conjectures, and in tilings where that knowledge, if it were certain, could be A VOYAGE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 447 Wherein he agreed entirely with the senti- ments of Socrates, as Plato delivers them ;, which I men- tion as the highest honor I can do that prince of philoso- phers. I have often since reflected, what destruction such doctrine would make in the libraries of Europe ; and how many paths of fame would be then shut up in the learned world. Friendship and benevolence are two principal virtues among the Hmiyhnhnms ; and these are not confined to particular objects, but universal to the whole race. For a stranger from the remotest part is equally treated with the nearest neighbor ; and wherever he goes, looks upon him- self as at home. They preserve decency and civility in the highest degrees, but are altogether ignorant of ceremony. They have no fondness for their colts or foals, but the care they take in educating them proceeds entirely from the dic- tates of reason. And I observed my master to show the same affection to his neighbor's issue, that he had for his own. They will have it that nature teaches them to love the whole species, and it is reason only that makes a dis- tinction of persons, where there is a superior degree of virtue. When the matron Houyhnhnms have produced one of each sex, they no longer accompany with their consorte, except they lose one of their issue by some casualty, which very seldom happens ; but in such a case they meet again ; or when the like accident befalls a person whose wife is past bearing, some other couple bestow on him one of their own colts, and then go together again until the mother is pregnant. This caution is necessary, to prevent the coun- try from being overburdened with numbers. But the race of inferior Houyhnhnms bred up to be servants, is not so strictlv limited upon this article; these are allowed W 448 Gulliver's travels: produce three of each sex, to be domestics in the noble families. In their marriages, they are exactly careful to choose such colors as will not make any disagreeable mixture in the breed. Strength is chiefly valued in the male, and comeliness in the female: not upon the account of love, but to preserve the race from degenerating ; for where a female happens to excel in strength, a consort is chosen with regard to comeliness. Courtship, love, presents, jointures, settlements, have no place in their thoughts ; or terms whereby to express them in their language. The young couple meet, and are joined, merely because it is the determination of their parents and friends : it is what they see done every day, and they look upon it as one of the necessary actions of a reasonable being. But the violation of marriage, or any other un- chastity, was never heard of, and the married pair pass their lives with the same friendship and mutual benevo- lence that they bear to all others of the same species who come in their way ; without jealousy, fondness, quarrelling, or discontent. In educating the youth of both sexes, their method is admirable, and highly deserves our imitation. These are not suffered to taste a grain of oats, except upon certai n days, till eighteen years old ; nor milk, but very rarely; and in summer they graze two hours in the morning, and as many in the evening, which their parents likewise observe ; but the servants are not allowed above half that time, and a great part of their grass is brought home, which they eat at the most convenient hours, when they can be best spared from work. Temperance, industry, exercise, and cleanliness, are the lessons equally enjoined to the young ones of both sexes ' A VOYAGE T!0 THE HOUYHNHNMS. 449 and ruy master thought it monstrous in us, to give the females a different kind of education from the males, except in some articles of domestic management; whereby, as he truly observed, one-half of our natives were good for nothing but bringing children into the world: and to trust the care of our children to such useless animals, he said, was yet a greater instance of brutality. But the Howyhnhnms train up their youths to strength, speed, and hardiness, by exercising them in running races up and down steep hills, and over hard stony grounds ; and when they are all in a sweat they are ordered to leap over head and ears into a pond or river. Four times a year the youth of a certain district meet to show their proficiency in running and leaping, and other feats of strength and agility; where the victor is rewarded with a song in his or her praise. On this festival, the servants drive a herd of Yahoos into the field, laden with hay, and oats, and milk, for a repast to the Houyhnhnms, after which these brutes are immediately driven back again, for fear of being noisome to the assembly. Every fourth year, at the vernal equinox, there is a rep- resentative council of the whole nation, which meets in a plain about twenty miles from our house, and continues about five or six days. Here they inquire into the state and condition of the several districts ; whether they abound or.be deficient in hay, or oats, or cows, or Yahoos; and wherever there is any want (which is but seldom) it is im- mediately supplied by unanimous consent and contribution. Here likewise the regulation of children is settled : as for instance, if a Houyhnhnm has two males, he changes one of them with another that has two females : and when a child has been lost by any casualty, where the mother is 29 450 GULLIVER'S travels: ])iiNt breeding, it is determined what family in the district shall breed another to supply the loss.* * Bishop Warburton, in a work originally published anonymously, gives the following severe review of Swift. " The religious author of the ' Tale of a Tub ' will tell you religion is but a reservoir for fools and madmen ; and the virtuous Lemuel Gulliver will answer for the state, that it is a den of savages and cut-throats. Let it be as they say, that ridicule and satire are the supplement of public laws, should not then the ends of both be the same — the benefit of mankind ? But whore is the sense of a general satire, if the whole species be degen- erated? And where is the justice of it if it be not? The punish- ment of lunatics is as wise as the one, and a generak execution as honest as the other ; in short, a general satire is the work only of ill men or little geniuses. The immortal Socrates employed his wit to better purpose ; his vein was rich but frugal; he thought the laugh came too dear when bought at the expense of probity, and therefore laid it all out in the improvement and reform of manners. But, not to be partial to antiquity, it must be owned that even then, for one Socrates to reform, it had a Democritus to sneer, a Diogenes to snarl, nay, even an Heraclitus to weep, at human obliquity. So much easier has it always been to invent a false philosophy on the credit of a pre- vailing passion, than to use even the first principles of reason to curb and restrain it. And here i t is well worth observing, that he of all those whom the world treated most severely, was the reformer j as he who most grossly abused his reason, even to the arguing against geomet- rical demonstration, was the scofier. Again at the revival of letters, a second Socrates arose in Erasmus, a Democritus in Kabelais, and a Diogenes in Peter Aretin. And again, the well-directed raillery of the great reformer drew down against its author more enemies than did all the filth, scurrility, and impieties of the buffoon and cynic." — A Critical Inquiry into Prodigies, etc., pp. 32-34, London, 1727. Bishop Percy, late Bishop of Dromore, in one of his unpublished MSS., makes the following comment on the description of the Houy- hnhnms and their [lolicy: "That 'which surprises me most in the Dean's work is his forgetting himself so much in his haste, as to leave religion out of the idea of a perfect republic. Since ho gave reason to his liorses, he might consittontly enough have given them a little natural religion." A VOYAGE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 451 CHAPTER IX. A. GRAND DBBATK AT THE QBNKRAL ASSKMBLY OF THE HOUYHNHWMS, AND HOW IT WAS DETERMINED — THE LEARNING OP THE HOUY- HNHNMS — THEIR BUILDINGS — THEIR MANNER OP BURIALS— THB DEPBCTIVENESS OP THEIR LANGUAGE. NANIMITY generally prevails in the decisions of the councils of the Houyhnhnms, even when the members come together with different opin- ions, for no Howyfmhnm is ashamed to become, a convert to reason and argument. One of these grand assemblies was held in my time, about three months before my departure, whither my master went as the representa- tive of our district. In this council was resumed their old debate, and indeed the- only debate that ever happened in their country; whereof my master, after his return, gave me a very particular account. The question to be debated was, " whether the Yahoos should be exterminated from the face of the earth ?" One of the members for the affirmative offered several argu- ments of great strength and weight, alleging, " that as the Yahoos were the most filthy, noisome, and deformed animal which nature ever produced, so they were the most restive and indocible, m'ischievous and malicious; they would privately suck the teats of the Houyhnhnms' cows, kill and devour their cats, trample down their oats and grass, if they were not continually watched, and commit a thousand other extravagances." He took notice of a general tradi- i52 Gulliver's travels: tion "that Yahoos had not been always in their country) but that, many ages ago, two of these brutes appeared together upon a mountain ; whether produced by the heat of the sun upon corrupted mud and slune, Or from the ooze and froth of the sea, was never known ; that these Yahoos 3ngendered, and their brood, in a short time, grew so numerous as to overrun and infest the whole nation ; that the Houyhnhnms, to get rid of this evil, made a general hunting, and at last inclosed the whole herd ; and destroy- ing the elder, every Houyhnhnm kept two young ones in a kennel, and brought them to such a degree of tameness, as an animal, so savage by nature, can be capable of acquir- ing; using them for draught and carriage: that there seemed to be much truth in this tradition, and that those creatures could not be ylnhniariishy (or aborigines of the land), because of the violent hatred the Houyhnhnms, as well as all other animals bore them, which, although their evil disposition sufficiently deserved, could never have arrived at so high a degree, if they had been aborigines ; or else they would have long since been rooted out ; that the inhabitants, taking a fancy to use the service of the Yahoos, had very imprudently neglected to cultivate the breed of asses, which are a comely animal, easily kept, more tame and orderly, without any offensive smell ; strong enough for labor, although they yield to the other in agility of body ; and if their braying be no agreeable sound, it is far preferable to the horrible bowlings of the Yahoos." Several others declared their sentiments to the same pur- pose, when my master proposed an expedient to the assem- bly, whereof he had indeed borrowed the hint from me. "He approved of the tradition mentioned by the honora- ble member who spoke before, and affirmed, that the two Yahoos said to be seen first among them, had been driven A VoVagE to the HOUtHNHNMS. 458 thither over the sea ; that coming to land, and being for- saken by their companions, they retired to tlie monntains, and degenerating by degrees, became in process of time much more savage than those of their own species in the country whence these two originals came. The reason of this assertion was, that he had now in his possession a cer- tain wonderful Yahoo (meaning myself), which most of them had heard of, and many of them had seen. He then related to them how he first found me : that my body was all covered with an artificial composure of the skins and hairs of other animals; that I spoke in a language of my own, and had thoroughly learned theirs; that I had related to him the accidents which brought me thither; thatwhenhe saw me without my covering, I was an exact Yahoo in every part, only of a whiter color, less hairy, and with shorter claws. He added how I had endeavored to persuade him, that in my own and other countries, the Yahoos acted as the governing, rational animal, and held the Houyhnhnms in servitude; that he observed in me all the qualities of a Yahoo, only a little more civilized by some tincture of rea- son, which, however, was in a degree as far inferior to the Houyhnhnm race, as the Yahoos of their country were to me; that among other things I mentioned a custom we had of castrating Houyhnhnms when they were young, in order to render them tame; that the operation was easy and safe; that it was no shame to learn wisdom from brutes, as in- dustry is taught by the ant, and building by the swallow ■ (ifbr so I translate the word lyhannh, although it be a much larger fowl); that this invention might be practiced upon the jrounger Yahoos here, which, beside rendering them tractable and fitter for use, would in an age put an end to the whole species, without destroying life; that in the meantime the Houyhnhnms should be exhorted to cultivate 454 auLLtVER's travels: the breed of asses, which, as they are in all Tespeets more valuable brutes, so they have this advantage, to be fit for service at five years old, which the others are not till twelve." This was all my master thought fit to tell me at that time, of what passed in the grand council. But he was pleased to conceal one particular, which related personally to myself, whereof I sof)n felt the unhappy effect, as the reader will know in its proper place, and whence I date all the succeeding misfortunes of my life. The Houyknhnms have no letters, and consequently their knowledge is all traditional. But there happening few events of any moment among a people so well united, naturally disposed to every virtue, wholly governed by reason, and cut off from all commerce with other nations; the historical part is easily preserved without burdening their memories. I have already observed that they are subject to no diseases, and therefore can have no need of physicians. However, they have excellent medicines, com- posed of herbs, to cure accidental bruises and cuts in the pastern or frog of the foot, by sharp stones, as well as other maims and hurts in the several parts of the body. They calculate the year by the revolution of the sun and the moon, but use no subdivisions into weeks. They are well enough acquainted with the motions of those two lumi- naries, and understand the nature of eclipses ; and this is the utmost progress of their astrouoray. In poetry, they must be allowed to excel all other mor- tals; wherein the justness of their similes, and the minute- ness as well as exactness of their descrii)tions, are indeed inimitable. Their verses abound very much in both of these, and usually contain either some exalted notions of friendship and benevolence, or the praises of those who A VOYAGE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 455 Were victors in races and other bodily exercises. Their buildings, although very rude and simple, are not inconve- nient but well contrived to defend them from all injuries of cold and heat. They have a kind of tree, which at forty years old loosens in the root, and falls with the first storm ; it grows very straight, and being pointed like stakes with a sharp stone (for the Houyhnlinms know not the use of iron), (hey stick them erect in the ground, about ten inches asunder, and then weave in oat-straw, or sometimes wattles between them. The roof is made after the same manner, * and so are the doors. The Houyhnlinms use the hollow part, between the pas- tern and the hoof of the forefoot, as we do our hands, and this with greater dexterity than I could at first imagine. I have seen a white mare of our family thread a needle (which, I lent her on purpose) with that joint. They milk their cows, reap their oats, and do all the work which re- quires hands, in the same manner. They have a kind of hard flints, which by grinding against other stones, they form into instruments, that serve instead of wedges, axes, and hammers. With tools made of these flints, they likewise cut their hay, and reap their oats, which there groSv nat- urally in several fields ; the Yahoos draw home the sheaves in carriages, and the servants tread them in certain cov- ered huts to get out the grain, which is kept in stores. They liiake a rude kind of earthen and wooden vessels^ and bake the former in the sun. " ■# If they can avoid casualties, they die only of old age, and are buried in the obscurest places that can be found, their friends and relations expressing neither joy nor grief at their departure; nor does the dying person discover the least regret that he is leaving the world, any more than if ho were upon returning home from a vis'it to one of his 456 GULLIVER'S travels: neighbors. I remember my master having once made an appointment with a friend and liis family to come to his house, upon some affair of importance : on the day fixed, tlie mistress and her two children came very late; she made two excuses, first for her husband, who, as she said, happened that very morning to Ihnuwnh. The word is strongly expressive in their language, but not easily ren- dered into English; it signifies, "to retire to his first mother." Her excuse for not coming sooner, was, that her husband dying late in the morning, she was a good while consulting her servants about a convenient place where his body should be laid ; and I observed, she behaved herself at our liouse as cheerfully as the rest; she died about three months after. They live generally to seventy or seventy-five years, very seldom . to fourscore : some weeks before their death, they feel a gradual decay ; but without pain. During this time they are much visited by their friends, because they cannot go abroad with their usual ease and satisfac- tion. However, about ten days before their death, which they seldom fail in computing, they return the visits that have been made them by those who are nearest in the neighborhood, being carried- in a convenient sledge drawn by Yahoos; which vehicle they use, not only upon this occasion, but when they grow old, upon long journeys, or when they are lamed by any accident ; and therefore, when the dying Houyhnhnms return those visits, they take a solemn leave of their friends, as if they were going to some remote part of the country, where they designed to pass the rest of their lives. I know not whether it may be worth observing, that the Homjhnhmns have no word in their language to express anything that is evil, except what they borrow from the A VOYAGE TO THE flOtJ? HNiaNMS. 457 deformities or. ill qualities of the Yahoos. Thus, they denote the folly of a servant, an omission of a child, a stone that cuts their feet, a continuance of fonl or unsea- sonable weather, and the like, by adding to each the epithet of Yahoo. For instance, hhnm Yahoo, whnaholm Yahoo, yrdhmndwihlma Yahoo, and an ill-contrived house ynholm- hnmrohlnw Yahoo. I could, with great pleasure, enlarge farther upon the manners and virtues of this excellent people ; but intend- ing in a short time to publish a volume by itself, expressly upon that subject, I refer the reader thither ; and, in the meantime, proceed to relate my own sad catastrophe. 458 qulliVer's travels : CHAPTER X. THE author's economy AND HAPPY LIFE AMONO THE HOtTYHN- HNMS— HIS GREAT IMPROTEMENT IN TIRTUE BY CONVERSINO ■WITH THEM— THEIR CONVERSATIONS — THE AUTHOR HAS NOTICE GIVEN HIM BY HIS MASTER, THAT HE MUST DEPART EROM THE COUNTRY — HE PALLS INTO A SWOON POR QRIEP, BUT SUBMITS — HE CONTRIVES AND FINISHES A CANOE BY THE HELP OF A FELLOW-SERVANT, AND PUT TO SE*. AT A VENTURE. i]UST at this time I had settled my little economy to my own heart's content. My master had ordered a room to be made for me, after their manner, about six yards from the house: the sides and floors of which I plastered with clay, and covered with rushmats of my own contriving; I had beaten hemp, which there grows wild, and made of it a sort of ticking ; this I filled with the feathers of several birds I had taken with springes made of Yahoos' hairs, and* were excellent food. I had worked two chairs with my knife, the sorrel nag helping me in the grosser and more laborious part. When my clothes were worn to rags, I made myself others with the skins of rabbits, and of a certain beautiful animal, * It should be, — and " which " were excellent food. Tbi.^ spnloncp is faulty in other respects ; but there, as well as in other passages of these "Voj'ages, the author has intentionally made use of inaccurate expression and studied negligence, in order to make the style more like that of a seafaring man ; on which account they have been passed over in silence, where such intention was ohvioas.^-Sheridan. A VOYAGE TO THE HOUTHNHNMS. 459 • about the same size, called nnuhnoh, the skin of which is covered with a fine down. Of these I also made very tolerable stockings. I soled my shoes with wood, which T cut from a tree, and fitted to the upper leather ; and when this was worn out, I supplied it with the skins of Yahoos dried in tlie sun. I often got honey out of hollow trees, which I mingled with water, or ate with my bread. No man could more verify the truth of these two maxims, " That nature is very easily satisfied ;" and, " That neces- sity is the mother of invention." I enjoyed perfect health of body, and tranquillity of mind ; I did not feel the treach- ery or inconstancy of a friend, nor the injuries of a secret or open enemy. I had no occasion of bribing, flattering, or pimping, to procure the favor of any great man, or of his minion. I wanted no fence against fraud or oppres- sion : here was neither physician to destroy my body, nor lawyer to ruin my fortune ; no informer to watch my words and actions, or forge accusations against me for hire: here were no gibers, censurers, backbiters, pickpockets, highwaymen, housebreakers, attorneys, bawds, buffoons, gamesters, politicians, wits, splenetics, tedious talkers, con- trovertists, ravishers, murderers, robbers, virtuosoes ; no leaders, or followers, of party and faction ; no encouragers to vice, by seduceiiient or examples; no dungeon, axes, gibbets, whipping-posts, or pillories ; no cheating shop- keepers or raeclianics; no pride, vanity, or affectation; no fops, bullies, drunkards, strolling whores, or poxes; no ranting, lewd, expensive wives ; no stupid, proud j)edants ; no importunate, overbearing, quarrelsome, noisy, roaring, empty, conceited, swearing companions; no scoundrels raised from the dust upon the merit of their vices, oi nobility thrown into it on account of their virtues; no lords, fiddlers, judges, or dancing-masters. 460 Gulliver's travels: I liadthe favor of being admitted to several Houyhnhnms who came to visitor dine with my master; where his honor graciously suffered me to wait in the room, and listen to their discourse. Both he and his company would often de- scend to ask me questions, and receive my answers. I had also sometimes the honor of attending my master in his visits to others. I never presumed to speak, except in an- swer to a question ; and then I did it with inward regret, because it was a loss of so much time for improving my- self: but I was infinitely delighted with the station of an humble auditor in such conversations, where nothing passed but what was useful, expressed in the fewest and most sig- nificant words : where, as I have already said, the greatest decency was observed without the least degree of ceremony ; where no person spoke without being pleased himself, and pleasing his companions ; where there was no interruption, tediousness, heat, or difference of sentiments. They have a notion, that when people are met together, a short silence does much improve conversation ; this I found to be true; for, during those little intermissions of talk, new ideas would arise in their minds, which very much enlivened the discourse. Their subjects are generally on friendship and benevolence, on order and economy ; sometimes upon the visible operations of nature, or ancient traditions ; upon the bonds and limits of virtue ; upon the unerring rules of reason, or upon some determinations to be taken at the next great assembly ; and often upon the various excellences of poetry. I may add, without vanity, that my presence often gave them suificient matter for discourse, because it afforded my master an occasion of letting his friends into the history of me and my country, upon which they were all pleased to descant, in a manner not very advantageous to humankind; and for that reason I shall not repeat what A VOYAGE TO THE DOUYHNHNMS. 461 they said : only I may be allowed lo observe, that his honor, to my great admiration, appeared to understand the nature of Yahoos much better than myself. He went through all our vices and follies, and discovered many, which I had never mentioned to him, by only supposing what qualities a Yahoo of their country, with a small proportion of reason, might be capable of exerting ; and concluded, with too much probability, "how vile, as well as miserable such a creature must be." I freely confess, that all the little knowledge I have of any value, was acquired by the lectures I received from my master, and from hearing the discourses of him and his friends ; to which I should be prouder to listen, than to dictate to the greatest and wisest assembly in Europe. I admired the strength, comeliness, and speed of the inhabi- tants ; and such a constellation of virtues, in such amiable persons, produced in me the highest veneration. At first, indeed, I did not. feel that natural awe, which the Yahoos and all other animals bear towards them ; but it grew upon me by degrees, much sooner than I imagined, and was mingled with a respectful love and gratitude, that they would condescend to distinguish me from the rest of my speciys. When I thought of my family, my friends, my country- men, or the human race in general, I considered them, as they really were. Yahoos in shape and disposition, perhaps a little more civilized, and qualified with the gift of speech; but making no other use of reason than to improve and mul- tiply those vices, whereof their brethren in this country had only the share that nature allotted them. When I happened to behold the reflection of my own form in a lake or a fountain, I turned away my face in horror and detestation of myself; and could better endure the sight of a common 462 aTJLLiVEJi's travels: Yahoo, than of my own person. By conversing with the Houyhnhnms and looking upon them with delight, I fell to imitate their gait and gestures, which is now grown into a habit ; and my friends often tell me, in a blunt way, " that I trot like a horse;" which, however, I take for a great compliment : neither shall I disown, that in speaking I am apt to fall into the voice and manner of the Houy- hnhnms, and hear myself ridiculed on that account, without the least mortification. In the midst of all this happiness, and when I looked upon myself to be fully settled for life, my master sent for me one morning a little earlier than his usual hour ; I ob- served by his countenance that he was in some perplexity, and at a loss how to begin what he had to speak. After a short silence he told me, " he did not know how I would take what he was going to say : that in the last general assembly, when the affair of the Yahoos was entered upon, the representatives had taken offence at his keeping a Yahoo (meaning myself) in his family, more like a Houyhnhnm than a brute animal : that he was known frequently to con- verse ^vith me, as if he could receive some advantage or pleasure in my company ; that such a practice was not agreeal:)Ie to reason or nature, or a thing ever heard of be- fore among them ; the assembly did therefore exhort him either to employ me like the rest of my species, or com- mand me to swim back to the place whence I came : that the first of these expedients was utterly rejected by all the Houyhnhnms who had ever seen me at his house or their own; for they alleged, that because I had some rudiments of reason^ added to the natural gravity of those animals, it was to be feared I might be able to seduce them into the woody and mountainous parts of the country, and bring them in troops by night to destroy the Houyhnhnms' cattle, A VOYAGE TO THE HOUTHNHNMS. 463 as being naturally of the ravenous kind, and averse from labor." My master added, " that he was daily pressed by the Houyhnhnms of the neighborhood, to have the assembly's exhortation executed, which he could not put off much longer. He doubted it would be impossible for me to swim to another country ; and therefore wished I would contrive some sort of a vehicle, resembling those I had described to him, that might carry me on the sea; in which work I should have the assistance of his own servants, as well as those of his neighbors." He concluded, " that for his own part, he could have been content to keep me in his service as long as I lived ; because he found I had cured myself of some bad habits and dispositions, by endeavoring, as far as my inferior nature was capable, to imitate the Houy- hnhnms." I should here observe to the reader, that a decree of the general assembly in this country is expressed by the word hnhloayn, which signifies an exhortation, as near as I can render it : for they have no conception how a rational crea- ture can be compelled, but only advised, or exhorted ; be- cause no person can disobey reason, without giving up his claim to be a rational creature. I was struck with the utmost grief and despair at my master's discourse ; and being unable to support the ago- nies I was under, I fell into a swoon at^his feet. When I oamB to myself, he told me, "that he concluded I had been dead ; " for these people are subject to no such imbecilities of nature. I answered, in a faint voice, " that death would have been' too great a happiness ; that although I could not blame the assembly's exhortation, or the urgency of his friends; yet, in my weak and corrupt judgment, I thought it .might consist with reason to have been less rigorous: 464 Gulliver's travels: that I could not swim a league, and probably the nearest land to theirs might be distant above a hundred : that many materials, necessary for making a small vessel to carry mc off, were wholly wanting in this country ; which, however, I would attempt, in obedience and gratitude to his honor, although I concluded the thing to be impossible, and there- fore looked on myself as already devoted to destruction : that the certain prospect of an unnatural death was the least of my evils; for, supposing I should escape with life by some strange adventure, how could I think with temper of passing my days among Yahoos, and relapsing into my nld corruptions for want of examples to lead and keep me within the paths of virtue? that I knew too well upon what solid reasons all the determinations of the wise Houy- hnhnms were founded, not to be shaken by arguments of mine, a miserable Yahoo; and therefore, after presenting him with my humble thanks for the offer of his servants' assistance in making a vessel, and desiring a reasonable time for so difficult a work, I told him I would endeavor to jjreserve a wretched being ; and if ever I returned to England, was not without hopes of being useful to my own species, by celebrating the praises of the renowned Souy- hnhnms, and proposing their virtues to the imitation of mankind." My master, in a few words, made a very gracious reply; allowed me the space of two months to finish my boat; and ordered the sorrel nag, my fellow-servant (for so at this distance I may presume to call him), to follow my in- struction, because I told my master, " that his help would be sufficient, and I knew he had a tenderness for me." In his company, my first business was to go to that part of the coast where my rebellious crew had ordered me to be set on shore. I got upon a height, and looking. on A VOYAGE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 465 every side into the sea, fancied I saw a small island toward the northeast, I took out my pocket-glass, and could then clearly distinguish it about five leagues off, as I computed: but it appeared to the sorrel nag to be only a blue cloud : for as he had no conception of any country beside his own, so he could not be as expert in distinguishing remote objects at sea, as we who so much converse* in that ele- ment. After I had discovered this island, I considered no far- ther ; but resolved it should, if possible, be the first place of my banishment, leaving the consequence to fortune. I returned home, and consulting with the sorrel nag, we went into a copse at some distance, where I with my knife, and he with a sharp flint, fastened very artificially after their manner to a wooden handle, cut down several oak wattles, about the thickness of a walking-staff, and some larger pieces. But I shall not trouble the reader with a particular description of my own mechanics; let it suffice to _say, that in six weeks' time, with the help of the sorrel nag, who performed the parts that required most labor, I finished a sort of Indian canoe, but much larger, covering it with the skins of Yahoos, well stitched together with hempen threads of my own making. My sail was likewise composed of the skins of the same animal ; but I made use of the youngest I could get, the older being too tough and thick; and I likewise provided myself with four paddles. I laid in a stock of boiled flesh of rabbits and fowls ; and took with me two vessels, one filled with milk and the other with water. * This is an uiicomnioii use of the word " converse:" instead of the verb, the adjective is always employed in this sense; as thus — "as we who are so conversant in that element." — Sheridan, 80 466 9ULLIVE?. 's travels: I tried my canoe in a large pond, near my master's house, and tlien corrected in it what Avas amiss ; stopping all the chinks with Yahoos' tallow, till I found it stanch, and able to bear me and my freight ; and, when it was as complete as I could possibly make it, I had it drawn on a carriage very gently by Yahoos to the seaside, under the conduct of the sorrel nag and another servant. When all was ready, and the day came for my de- parture, I took leave of my master, and lady, and the whole family, my eyes flowing with tears, and my heart quite sunk with grief. But his honor, out of curiosity, and perhaps (if I may speak it without vanity) partly out of kindness, was determined to see me in my canoe; and got several of his neighboring friends to accompany him. I was forced to wait above an hour for the tide, and then observing the wind very fortunately bearing towards the island to which I intended to steer my course, I took a second leave of my master : but as I was going to pros- trate myself to kiss his hoof, he did me the honor to raise it gently to my mouth. I am not ignorant how much I have been censured for mentioning this last particular. Detractors are pleased to think it improbable, that so illus- trious a person should descend to give so great a mark of distinction to a creature so inferior as I. Neither have I forgotten how apt some travellers are. to boast of extraor- dinary favors they have received. But, if these censurers were better acquainted with the noble and courteous dis- position of the Howyhnhnms, they would soon change their opinion. I paid my respects to the rest o. the Houyhnhmns in his honor's company ; then getting into my canoe, I pushed off from the shore. A V0YA9B TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 467 CHAPTER XI. THE author's DANGEROTJS VOYAGE — KB ARRIVES AT NEW HOLLAND, HOPING TO SETTLE THERK — IS WOUNDED WITH AN ARROW BY ONE OF THE NATIVES — IS SEIZED AND CARRIED BY FORCE INTO A PORTUGUESE SHIP — THE GREAT CIVILITIES OF THE CAPTAIN — THE AUTHOR ARRIVES AT ENGLAND. UST at nine o'clock in the morning of February 15, 1714-15, I began this desperate voyage. The wind was very favorable ; however, I made use at first only of my paddles ; but considering I should soon be weary, and that the wind might chop about, I ventured to set up my little sail ; and thus, with the help of the tide, I went at the rate of a league and a half an hour, as near as I could guess. My master and his friends continued on the shore till I was almost out of sight; and I often heard the sorrel nag (who always loved me) crying out, " Hnuy ilia nyha majah Yahoo ;"-^-Take care of thyself, gentle Yahoo. My design was, if possible, to discover some small island uninhabited, yet sufficient by my labor to furnish me with the necessaries of life, which I would have thought a greater happiness, than to be first minister in the politest court of Europe ; so horrible was the idea I conceived of returning to live in the society, and under the government of Yahoos. For in such a solitude as I desired, I could at" least enjoy my own thoughts, and reflect with delight on the virtues of those inimitable Houyhnhnms, without any 468 GULLIVEK'S TRAVELS* opportunity of degenerating into the vices and corruptions of my own species. The reader may remember what I related, when ray crew conspired against me, and confined me to my cabin ; how I continued there several weeks without knowing what course we took , and when I was put ashore in the long- boat, how the sailors told me with oaths, whether true or false, " that they knew not in what part of the world we were." However, I did then believe us to be about 10 de- grees southward of the Cape of Good Hope, or about 45 degrees southern latitude, as I gathered from some general words I overheard among them, being I supposed to the southeast in their intended voyage to Madagascar. And although this were little better than conjecture, yet I re- solved to steer my course eastward, hoping to reach the southwest coast of New Holland, and perhaps some such island as I desired, lying westward of it. The wind was full west, and by six in the evening I computed I had gone eastward at least eighteen leagues ; when I spied a very small island about half a league off, which I soon reached. It was nothing but a rock, with one creek naturally arched by the force of tempests. Here 1 put in my canoe, and climb- ing a part of the rock, I could plainly discover land to the east, extending from south to north. I lay all night in my canoe ; and repeating my voyage early in tlie morning, I arrived in seven hours to the southeast point of New Hol- land. This confirmed me in the opinion I have long en- tertained, that the maps and charts place this country at least three degrees more to the east than it really is ; which thought I communicated many years ago to my worthy iriend, IMr. Herman Moll, and gave him my reasons for it, although he has rather chosen to follow other authors. I saw no iuhabitants in the place where I landed, and A VOYAGE TO THE HOtJirHNHNMS. 469 being unarmed, I was afraid of venturing far into the country. I found some shellfish on the shore, and ate them raw, not daring to kindle a fire, for fear of being discovered by the natives. I continued three days feeding on oysters and limpets, to save my own provision ; and I fortunately found a brook of excellent water, which gave me great relief. On the fourth day, venturing out early a little too far, I saw twenty or thirty natives upon a height not above five hundred yards from me. They were stark naked, men, women, and children, round a fire, as I could discover by the smoke. One of them spied me, and gave notice to the rest ; five of them advanced towards me, leaving the wo- men and children at the fire. I made what haste I could to the shore, and, getting into my canoe, shoved off: the savages, observing me retreat, ran after me ; and before I could get far enough into the sea, discharged an arrow, which wounded me deeply on tiie inside of my left knee: I shall carry the mark to my grave. I apprehended the arrow might be poisoned, and paddling out of the reach of their darts (being a calm day), I made a shift to suck the wound, and dress it as well as I could. I was at a loss what to do, for I durst not return to the same landing-place, but stood to the north, and was forced to paddl.e ; for the wind, though very gentle, was against me, blowing northwest. As I was looking about for a secure landing-place, I saw a sail to the north-northeast, which appearing every minute more visible, I was in some doubt whether I should wait for them, or not ; but at last my detestation of the Yahoo race prevailed ; and turning ray canoe, I sailed and paddled together to the south, and got into the same creek whence I set out in the morning, choosing rather to trust myself among these barbarians, 470 GtJLtiVEK's travels: than live with European Yahoos. I drew up my canoe as close as I could to the shore, and hid myself behind a stone by the little brook, which, as I have already said, was excellent water. The ship came within half a league of this creek, and sent her longboat with vessels to take in fresh water (for the place it seems was very well known), but I did not ob- serve it, till the boat was almost on shore ; and it was too late to seek another hiding-place. The seamen at their landing observed my canoe, and rummaging it all over, easily conjectured that the owner could not be far off. Four of them, well armed, searched every cranny and lurk- ing-hole, till at last they found me flat on my face behind the stone. They gazed awhile in admiration at my strange uncouth dress ; my coat made of skins, my wooden-soled shoes, and my furred stockings ; whence, however, they concluded I was not a native of the place, who all go naked. One of the seamen, in Portuguese, bid me rise, and asked me who I was. I understood that language very well, and getting upon my feet, said, " I was a poor Yahoo, banished from the Houyhnhnms, and desired they would please to let me depart." They admired to hear me answer them in their own tongue, and saw by my complexion I must be a European ; but were at a loss to know what I meant by Yahoos and Houyhnhnms ; and at tlje same time fell a laughing at my strange tone in speaking, which resembled the neighing of a horse. I trembled all the while betwixt fear and hatred. I again desired leave to depart, and was gently moving to my canoe : but they laid hold of me, desiring to know "what country I was of? whence I came ? " with many other questions. I told them "I was born in England, whence I came about five years ago, and then their country and ours were at peace. I A VOYAGM TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 471 fchereiore hoped they would not treat me as an enemy, since I meant them no harm ; but was a poor Yahoo, seek- ing some desolate place where to pass the remainder of his unfortunate life." When they began to talk, I thought I never heard or saw anything so unnatural ; for it appeared to me as mon- strous as if a dog or a cow should speak in England, or a Yahoo in Houyhnhnmland. The honest Portuguese were equally amazed at my strange dress, and tiie odd manner of delivering my words, which, however, they understood very well. They spoke to me with great humanity, and said, " they were sure the captain would carry me gratis to Lisbon, whence I might return to my own country ; that two of the seamen would go back to the ship, inform the captain of what they had seen, and receive his orders; in the meantime, unless I would give my solemn oath not to fly, they would secure me by force." I thought it best to comply with their proposal. They were very curious to know my story, but I gave them very little satisfaction, and they all conjectured that my misfortunes had impaired my reason. In two hours the boat, which went laden with vessels of water, returned, with the captain's command to fetch me on board. I fell on my knees to preserve vay liberty ; but all was in vain ; and the men, having tied me with cords, heaved me into the boat, whence I was taken into the ship, and thence into the captain's cabin. His name was Pedro de Mendez; he was a very cour- teous and generous person. He entreated me to give some account of myself, and desired to know what I would eat or drink : said, " I should be used as well as himself;" and spoke so many obliging things, that I wondered to find such civilities from a Yahoo. However, I remained silent and sullen; I was ready to faint at the very smell of him 472 Gulliver's travels; and his men. At last I desired something to eat out of my own canoe ; but he ordered me a chicken, and some excellent wine, and then directed that I should be put to bed in a very clean cabin. I would not undress myself, but lay on the bedclothes, and in half an hour .stole out wiien I thought the crew was at dinner, and getting to the side of the ship, was going to leap into the sea and swim for my life, rather than continue among Yahoos. But one of tlie seamen prevented me, and having informed the captain, I was chained to my cabin. After dinner, Don Pedro came to me, and desired to know my reason for so desperate an attempt; assured me, " he only meant to do me all the service he was able;" and spoke so very movingly, that at last I descended to treat him like an animal which had some little portion of rea- son. I gave him a very short relation of my voyage ; of the conspiracy against me by my own men ; of the country where they set me on shore, and of my five years' resi- dence, there: all which he looked upon as if it were a dream or a vision ; whereat I took great offence ; for I had quite forgot the faculty of lying, so peculiar to Yahoos in all countries where they preside, and consequently, the disposition of suspecting truth in others of their own spe- cies. I asked him, "whether it were the custom in his country to say the thing which was not?" I assured hira, " I had almost forgot what he meant by falsehood, and if I had lived a thousand years in Houyhnhnrrdand, I should never have heard a lie from the meanest servant; that I was altogether indifferent whether he believed me or not; but however, in return for his favors, I would give so much allowance to the corruption of his nature, as to answer any objection he might please to make, and then he might easily discover the truth." A Voyage to the houthhhnMs. 4?3 The captain, a wise man, a,fter many endeavors to catch me tripping in some part of my story, at last began to have a better opinion of my veracity. But he added " that since I professed so inviolable an attachment to truth, I must give him my word and honor to bear him company in this voyage, without attempting anything against my life ; or else he would continue me a prisoner until we arrived at Lisbon." I gave him the promise required ; but at the same time protested, " that I would suffer the greatest hard- ships^ rather than return to live among Yahoos." Our voyage passed without any considerable accident. In gratitude to the captain, I sometimes sat with him at his earnest request, and strove to conceal my antipathy a^inst humankind, although it often broke out, which he suffered to pass without observation. But the greatest part of the day I confined myself to my cabin, to avoid seeing any of the crew. The captain had often entreated me to strip myself of my savage dress, and offered to lend me the best suit of clothes he had. This I would not be prevailed on to accept, abhorring to cover myself with anything that had been on the back of a Yahoo : I only desired he would lend me two clean shirts, which, having been washed since he wore them, I believed would not so much defile me. These I changed every second day, and washed them myself. We arrived at Lisbon, Novepiber 5th, 1715. At our landing, the captain forced me to cover myself with his cloak, to prevent the rabble from crowding about me. I was conveyed to his own house ; and at my earnest request he led me up to the highest room backward. I conjured him "to conceal from all persons what I had told him of the Houyhnhnms; because the least hint of such a story would not only draw numbers of people to see me, but probably 474 Gulliver's travels: put me in danger of being imprisonerl, or burnt by the In- quisition." The captain persuaded me to accept a suit of clothes newly made; but I would not suffer the tailor to take my measure; however, Don Pedro being almost of my size, they fitted me well enough. Pie accoutred mo with other necessaries, all new, which I aired for twenty- four hours before I would use them. The captain had no wife, nor above three servants, none of which were suffered to attend at meals; and his whole deportment was so obliging, added to very good human understanding, that I really began to tolerate his company. He gained so far upon me, that I ventured to look out of the back window. By degrees I was brought into another room, whence I peeped into the street, but drew my head back in a fright. In a week's time he seduced me down to the door. I found my terror gradually lessened, but ray hatred and contempt seemed to increase. I was at last bold enough to walk the street in his company, but kept my nose well stopped with rue, and sometimes with tobacco. In ten days, Don Pedro, to whom I had given some ac- count of my domestic affairs, put it upon me, as a matter of honor and conscience, " that I ought to return to my native country, and live at home with my wife and chil- dren." He told me, ■" there was an English ship in port just ready to sail, and hs would furnish me with all things necessary." It would be tedious to repeat his arguments, and my contradictions. He said, " it was altogether im- possible to find such a solitary island as I had desired to live in ; but I might command in my own house, and pass my time in a manner as recluse as I pleased." I complied at last, finding I could do no better. I left Lisbon the 24th day of November, in an English mer- A VOYAGE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 475 chantman, but who was the master I never inquired. Don Pedro accompanied me to the ship, and lent me twenty pounds. He tool? kind leave of me, and embraced me at parting, which I bore as well as I could. During this last voyage I had no commerce with the master or any of his men; but pretending. I was sick, kept close in my cabin. On the 5th of December 1715, we cast anchor in the Downs, about nine in the morning, and at three in the afternoon I got safe to my house at Redriff. My wife and family received me with great surprise and joy, because they concluded me certainly dead ; but I must freely confess the sight of them filled me only with hatred, disgust, and contempt ; and the more, by reflecting on the near alliance I had to them. For although, since my un- fortunate exile from the Houyhnhnm country, I had com- pelled myself to tolerate the sight of Yahoos, and to con- verse with Don Pedro de Mendez, yet my memory and imagination were perpetually filled with, the virtues and ideas of those exalted Houyhnhnms. And when I began to consider that, by copulating with one of the Yahoo species I had become a parent of more, it struck me with the ut- most shame, confusion, and horror. As soon as I entered the house, my wife took me in her arms and kissed me ; at which, having not been used to the touch of that odious animal for so many years, I fell into a swoon for almost an hour. At the time I am writing, it is five years since my last return to England ; during the first year, I could not endure my wife and children in ray presence ; the very smell of them was intolerable ; much less could I suffer them to eat in the same room. To this hour they dare not presume to touch my bread, or drink out of the same cup, neither was I ever able to let one of them take me by the liand. The first money I laid out 476 GULLIVER s travels; was to buy two young stone-horses, which I keep in a goocl stable ; and next to them the groom is my greatest favorite; for I feel my spirits revived by the smell he contracts in the stable. My horses understand me tolerably well : I converse with them at least fonr hours every day. They are strangers to bridle and saddle; they live in great amity with me, and friendship to each other. A VOYASE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 477 CHAPTER XII. THB author's veracity — HIS DESIGN IN PITBLISHING THIS WORK — HIS CENSURE OP THOSE TRAVELLERS WHO SWERVE FROM THE TRUTH — ^THE AUTHOR CLEARS HIMSELIT FROM ANY SINISTER ENDS IN WRITING — AN OBJECTION ANSWERED — THB METHOD OF PLANTING COLONIES — HIS NATIVE COUNTRY COMMENDED — THE RIGHT OF THE CROWN TO THOSE COUNTRIES DESCRIBED BY THE AUTHOR IS JUSTIFIED — THE DIFFICULTY OF CONQUERING THEM — THB AUTHOR TAKES HIS LAST LEAVE OP THE READER; PRO- POSES HIS MANNER OF LIVING FOR THE FUTURE J GIVES GOOD ADVICE, AND CONCLUDES. ND thus, gentle reader, I have given thee a faith- ful history of my travels for sixteen years and above seven months ; wherein I have not been so studious of ornament as of truth. I could, perhaps, like others, have astonished thee with strange improbable tales; but I rather chose to relate plain matter of fact, in the simplest manner and style; because my principal design was to inform, and not to amuse thee. It is easy for us who travel into remote countries, which are seldom visited by Englishmen or other Europeans, to form descriptions of wonderful animals both at sea and land. Whereas a traveller's chief aim should be to make men wiser and better, and to improve their minds by the bad, as well as good example, of what they deliver concerning foreign places. I could heartily wish a law vvas enacted, that every tray- 478 GULLIVER'S travels: eller, before he were permitted to publish his voyages, should be obliged to make oath before the Lord High Chancellor, that all he intended to print was absolutely true to the best of his knowledge; for then the world would no longer be deceived, as it usually is, while some writers, to make their works pass the better upon the public, impose the grossest falsities on the unwary reader. I have jierused several books of travels with great delight in my younger days ; but having since gone over most parts of the globe, and been able to contradict many fabulous accounts from my own observation, it has given me a great disgust agaiust this part of reading, and some indignation to see the cre- dulity of mankind so impudently abused. Therefore, since my acquaintance were pleased to think my poor endeavors might not be unacceptable to my country, I imposed on ray- self as a maxim never to be swerved from, that I would strictly adhere to truth ; neither indeed can I be ever under the least temptation to vary from it, while I retain in my mind the lectures and example of my noble master and the other illustrious Houyhnhnms of whom I had so long the honor to be an humble hearer: Nee si inisorurn Fortuna Binonem Pinxit, Tiinum etiam, mendacemque improba finget. I know very well, how little reputation is to be got by writings, which require neither genius nor learning, nor indeed any other talent except a good memory, or an exact journal. I know likewise, that writers of travels, like dic- tionary-makers, are sunk into oblivion -by the weight and bulk of those \vho come last, and therefore lie uppermost. As it is highly prohabli', that such travellers, who shall hereafter visit the countries described in this work of mine, may, by detecting my errors (if there be any), and adding A VOYAGE TO THE HOUYHNHNMS. 479 many new discoveries of their own, jiistlc me out of vogue, and stand in my place, making the world forget that ever I was an author. This indeed would be too great a morti- fication, if I wrote for fame : but as ray sole intention was the public good, I cannot be altogether disappointed. For who can read of the virtues I have mentioned in the glori- ous Houyhnhnms, without being ashamed of his own vices, when he considers himself as the reasoning, governing ani- mal of his country? I- shall say nothing of those remote nations where Yahoos preside ; among which the least cor- rupted are the Brobdingnagians, whose wise maxims in morality and government it would be our happiness to ob- serve. But I forbear descanting farther, and rather leave the judicious reader to his own remarks and application.. I am not a little pleased, that this work of mine can pos- sibly meet with no censurers ; for what objections can be made against a writer, who relates only plain facts, that happened in such distant countries, where we have not the least interest, with respect either to trade or negotiations? I have carefully avoided every fault, with which common writers of travels are often too justly charged. Besides, I meddle not the least with any party, but write without pas- sion, prejudice, or ill-will against any man, or number of men whatsoever. I write for the noblest end, to inform and instruct mankind; over whom I may, without breach of modesty, pretend to some superiority, from the advan- tages I received by conversing so long among the most accomplished Houyhnhnms. I write without any view to jirofit or praise. I never suffer a word to pass that may look like reflection, or possibly give the least offence, even to those who are most ready to take it. So that I hope I may with justice pronounce myself an author perfectly blameless; against whom the tribes of Answerers, Consid- 480 GULLIVER '(3 TRAVELS: erers, Observers, Reflectors, Detecters, Remarkers, will never be able to find matter for exercising their talents. I confess,. it was whispered to me, "that I was bound in duty, as a subject of England, to have given in a memorial to a Secretary of State at my first coming over : because whatever lands are discovered by a subject, belong to the crown." But I doubt, whether our conquests, in the coun- tries I treat of, would be as easy as those of Ferdinando Cortez over the naked Americans. The lAlliputians, I think, are hardly worth the charge of a fleet and army to reduce them ; and I question whether it might be prudent or safe to attempt the Brobdingnagians ; or whether an English army would be much at their ease, with the Fly- ing Island over their heads. The Houyhnhnms indeed appear not to be so well prepared for war, a science to which they ' are perfect strangers, and especially against missive weapons. However, supposing myself to be a minister of state, I could never give my advice for invad- ing them. Their prudence, unanimity, unacquaintedness with fear, and their love of their country, would amply supply all defects in the military art. Imagine twenty thousand of them breaking into the midst of a European army, confounding the ranks, overturning the carriages, battering the warriors' faces into mummy by terrible yerks from their hinder hoofs ; for they would well deserve the character given to Augustus, Recalcitrat undique tubus. But,.instead of proposals for conquering that magnanimous nation, I rather wish they were in a capacity, or disposi- tion, to send a sufficient number of their inhabitants for civilizing Europe, by teaching us tiie first principles of honor, justice, truth, temperance, public spirit, fortitude, chastity, friendship, benevolence, and fidelity. The names of all which virtues are still retained among us in most A VOYAGE TO THE HOUTHNHNMS. 481 languages, and are to be met with in modern, as well as ancient authors ; which I am able to assert from my own small reading. But I had another reason, which made me less forward to enlarge his majesty's dominions by my discoveries. To say the truth, I had conceived a few scruples with relation to the distributive justice of princes upon those occasions. For instance, a crew of pirates are driven by a storm they know not whither ; at length a boy discovers land from the topmast; they go on shore to rob and plunder; they see a harmless people ; are entertained with kindness ; they give the country a new name ; they take formal possession of it for their king; they set up a rotten plank, or stone, for a memorial ; they murder two or three dozen of the natives, bring away a couple more, by force, for a sample ; return home, and get their pardon. Here commences a new do- minion, acquired with a title by divine right. Ships are sent with the first opportunity; the natives driven out or destroyed; their princes tortured to discover their gold; a free license given to all acts of inhumanity and lust, the earth reeking with the blood of its inhabitants ; and this execrable crew of butchers, employed in so piotis an expe- dition, is a modern colony, sent to convert and civilize an idolatrous and barbarous people. But this description, I confess, does by no means affect the British nation, who may be' an example to the whole world for their wisdom, care, and justice in planting col- onies; their liberal endowments for the advancement of religion and learning; their choice of devout and able pastors to propagate Christianity ; their caution in stocking their provinces with people of sober lives and conversa- tions from this the mother kingdom ; their strict regard to the distribution of justice, in supplying the civil adminis- 31 482 guIjLIVEr's travels: tration through all their colonies with officers of the greatest abilities, utter strangers to corruption; and, to crown all, by sending the most vigilant and virtuous governors, who have no other views than the happiness of the people over whom they preside, and the honor of the king their master. But as those countries, which I have described, do not appear to have any desire of being conquered and enslaved, murdered or driven out, by colonies; nor abound either in gold, silver, sugar, or tobacco ; I did humbly conceive, they were by no means proper objects of our zeal, our valor- or, our interest. However, if those whom it more concerns think fit to be of another opinion, I am ready to depose, when I shall be lawfully called, that no European did ever visit those countries before me. I mean, if the inhabi- tants ought to be believed, unless a dispute may arise con- cerning the two Yahoos, said to have been seen many years ago upon a mountain in Houyhnhnmland. But, as to the formality of taking possession in my sovereign's name, it never came once into my thoughts ; and if it had, yet, as my afiairs then stood, I should per- haps, in point of prudence and self-preservation, have put it off to a better opportunity. Having thus answered the only objection that can ever be raised against me as a traveller, I here take a final leave of all my courteous readers, and return to enjoy my own ?[)eculatious in my little garden at Redriff; to apply those excellent lessons of virtue, which I learned among the Ilouyhnhnms ; to instruct the Yahoos of my own family, as far as I shall find them docible animals; to behold my figure often in a glass, and thus, if possible, habituate my- self by time to tolerate the sight of a human creature; to lament the brutality of Houyhnhmns, in my own country, A VOYAGE TO THE HODTHNHNMS. 483 but always treat their persons with respect, for the sake of my noble master, his family, his friends, and the whole Houyhnhnm race, whom these of oui's have the honor to resemble in all their lineaments, however their intellectuals came to degenerate. I began last week to permit my wife to sit at dinner with me, at the farthest end of a long table ; and to answer (but with the utmost brevity) the few questions I asked her. Yet, the smell of a Yahoo continuing very offensive, I always keep my nose well stopped with rue, lavender, or tobacco leaves. And although it be hard for a man late in life to remove old habits, I am not altogether out of hopes, in some time, to suffer a neighbor Yahoo in my company, without the apprehensions I am yet under of his teeth or his claws. My reconcilement to the Yahoo kind in general might not be so difficult, if they would be content with those vices and follies only, which nature has entitled them to. I am not in the least provoked at the sight of a lawyer, a pickpocket, a colonel, a fool, a lord, a gamester, a politi- cian, a whoremonger, a physician, an evidence, a suborner, an attorney, a traitor, or the like ; this is all according to the due course of things : but when I behold a lump of deformity and diseases, both in body and mind, smitten with pride, it immediately breaks all the measures of my patience ; neither shall I be ever able to comprehend how such an animal, and such a vice, could tally together. The wise and virtuous Houyhnhnms, who abound in all the ex- cellences that can adorn a rational creature, have no name for this vice in their language; which has no terms to express anything that is evil, except those whereby they describe the detestable qualities of their Yahoos; among which they were not able to distinguish this of pride for 484 GflTLLIVER'S TRAVELS. want of thoroughly understanding human nature, as it shows itself in other countries where that animal presides. But I, who had more experience, could plainly observe some rudiments of it among the wild Yahoos. But the Houyhnhnms, who live under the government of reason, are no more proud of the good qualities they possess, than I should be for not wanting a leg or an arm ; which no man in his wits would boast of, although he must be miserable without them. I dwell the longer upon this subject, from the desire I have to make the society of an English Yahoo by any means not insupportable ; and therefore I here entreat those, who have any tincture of this absurd vice, that they will not presume to come in my sight. Cornell University Library PR 3724.G9 1870 Travels into several remote nations of t 3 1924 013 200 609