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BOUGHT WITH THE INCOME
OF THE SAGE ENDOWMENT
FUND GIVEN IN 1891 By

HENRY WILLIAMS SAGE

 

 

 

 

 

 
DATE DUE

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH
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NOAH COUNSELLETH JAPHET ON THE ARK.
   

THE MAXIMS
OLR INGO A H

Derived from his Experience with
Women Both Before and After the
Flood as Given in Counsel
to His Son Japhet

BY

GELETT BURGESS

Author of “The Maxims
of Methuselah,” “Are You
a Bromide?” “Goops,” etc.

With Illustrations and Designs
by Louis D. Fancher

NEW YORK
FREDERICK A. STOKES COMPANY
PUBLISHERS
 

Copyright, 1911
By The Ess Ess Publishing Co.

Copyright, 1913
By The Phillips Publishing Co.

Copyright, 1913
By The Star Company

Copyright, 1913
By Gelett Burgess

 

 
 

LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS

Noah counselleth Japhet on the Ark . . . . Frontispiece
The Lesson of the Waiter. Choosing the

Kissable Coreteees Mirect ar Facing Page 32
Wiles of a Subtile Virgin . . . . . . . Facing Page 54
Noah's; Maprof loves = 49a 4 = = . = 5 acing Pagess

‘‘Ban Iluma, za lomea ghoop; tio en dopeb;
Ban ilo, gups amoboz.

Hugfero el ban Coomu frozut edjo, cro but anto,
Ductu grum elato—hubuzomturzug!”’

 
Sntroduction

OAH, the grandson of Methu-

selah, was quite as remarkable

a man as his elderly ancestor,
and was equally renowned for his wis-
dom and virtue. Even in the matter of
age, wherein Methuselah became famous,
Noah was not far behind. He lived
only nineteen years less than Methu-
selah, dying at the age of nine hundred
and fifty. He had, moreover, distinctly
human characteristics that made him
one of the most lovable of the ancient
patriarchs.

The Book of Genesis gives but a scant
account of his personality. He stands
there merely as an instrument of the
wrath of God, the futile prophet of the
flood, of which he becomes the hero.

 
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INTRODUCTION

The Bible, indeed, touches lightly upon
his weakness in the matter of drink (a
fault that has endeared him to our hearts
more than his many years of sobriety),
but it gives no adequate picture of this
celebrated man.

To obtain a larger view of his charac-
ter, therefore, we must turn to other
Hebraic writings. The Talmud, the
Midrashian literature, the Book of
Jasher and other Semitic sources are
more generous in their treatment of our
hero. There the narrative is picturesque
and dramatic—at times even pleasantly
humorous. We see Noah truly as a
human being, in the midst of his joys
and cares. His was no ordinary expe-
rience; his life held large responsibilities.
He was the executive head for a while
of the whole living world. Let us, then,
in the light of these primitive Jewish
legends, reconstruct the Father of Man-
kind and trace the story of his life.

From the first we shall find him extra-

 

 
 

INTRODUCTION

ordinary. His birth marked the begin-
ning of a new epoch.

His father Lamech, a somewhat shal-
low man, with little of the rigid austerity
of his ancestors, had married a wife—
Ashmua, daughter of Elishua, son of
Enoch—secured for him by his father
Methuselah. She bore him a man-child.
This son was like no boy ever before
seen. The body of the babe was white
as snow, and red as a blooming rose,
and the hair of his head and his long
locks were white as wool, and his eyes
bright as the rays of the sun.!

No wonder that his father was afraid
of him, and fled to Acs father, saying, “I
have begotten a strange son!”? Methu-
selah himself was so puzzled that he
decided to call upon the fount of primi-
tive human wisdom, the patriarch Enoch,
the hermit, who, as the pious reader of
course knows, some sixty-nine years

1! Book of Enoch, chap. cvi.
2 Book of Enoch, chap. cvi.

 

 
 

 

Fata St

INTRODU

CTION

previous, had been taken up to heaven
in a chariot of fire.

Methuselah immediately went upon
this errand, travelling to the end of the
earth, where he called upon his father.
Enoch appeared to him and explained
the portent, prophesying the Flood
which should destroy the whole world
and its inhabitants with the exception of
the new-born child and his offspring.
He directed that the boy should be
named Noah, “for he would cause the
earth to rejoice, in compensation for all
destruction.’

But this was not all, The translated
patriarch gave good news as well as bad
concerning the son of Lamech. This
concerned the primal curse upon man-
kind called down from on high by reason
of Adam’s fall.

Biblical students will, no doubt, recall
that Adam was originally given domin-
ion over all the earth and its inhabitants

1 Book of Enoch, chap. cvii.

 

 
 

INTRODUCTION

(Gen, 1:26). When the sinful pair was
driven from Paradise, however, this
blessing was revoked.t| From that time
till the birth of Noah (about one thou-
sand and fifty six years, to be precise),
agriculture had been practically impos-
sible. Little but thorns and _ thistles
would grow. If a man sowed wheat, wild
oats would spring up. The cow refused
to obey the ploughman, and the furrow
itself would not go straight. Not only
was the earth intractable, but the sea,
also, acted in a disorderly way, trans-
gressing its bounds daily, at morn and
eve, not even respecting the graves of
the dead.

It was Noah’s extraordinary destiny
to remedy this unhappy state of affairs.
When Jehovah said to Adam, upon his
moving from Paradise, “Cursed now is
the ground for thy sake!” the first man

1 Although the Talmud, as well as the Bible,
(Gen. iv, 12), gives the reason of the curse of infertility
as Cain’s murder of Abel, The above account, how-
ever, has more verisimilitude.

 

 
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INTRODUCTION

asked, “For how long?” This was his
answer: “Until a man-child is born such
that the rite of circumcision need not be
practised upon him.” Such was Noah,
the son of Lamech, the son of Methu-
selah.

This curse thus removed from man,
the inhabitants of the earth went in for
farming and prospered mightily. Noah
himself had not only a passive, but an
active part in this. He invented the
plough, the scythe, the hoe and other
agricultural instruments.’

Before, men had worked the soil with
their bare hands. Now, they knew
neither toil nor care. A single sowing
bore a harvest sufficient for forty years.”
The sea now kept strictly to its proper
courses.’ Intoxicated by this unex-
ampled prosperity, mankind grew proud
and arrogant.

Tanhuma Bereshit ed. Amsterdam, 6°,

Tanhuma, ed. Buber, I, 26.
Bereshit Rabba, xxv, 2.

 

 
 

INTRODUCTION |

Noah, as we know also, spent a large
part of his energy in predicting the
Deluge. For one hundred and twenty
years he went up and down in the land
urging mankind to reform, or take
the consequences. The prophet was, as
usual, without honor in his own country;
and this in spite of the fact that men
had already seen a previous attempt on
the part of Jehovah to flood the earth,
in the days of Enoch. The effort was,
however, only partly successful. This
minor deluge is described in the Talmud.
The river Gihon overflowed its banks,
but only a third of the earth was de-
stroyed.

The patriarch was not, however,
known by the name of Noah until after
the Deluge. There was magic and sor-
cery in the land. Men could even com-
mand the sun and stars. For fear that
his grandson might become the victim
of these illicit practices, Methuselah di-
rected that in public the son of Lamech

 

 
 

INTRODUCTION

should be called Menahem (Comforter).
In this way he was kept from being
bewitched.

This precaution was a real necessity,
for the world was a wicked place before
the Flood. The fallen angels—the “sons
of God,” according to the Book of Gen-
esis—having requested permission to
dwell on the earth, that the world might
glorify Jehovah’s name, were given sub-
lunary bodies for the purpose. But,
seduced by the charm of the female de-
scendants of Cain, they fell again. The
giants, the progeny of such unions,"
known as the Emmim, the Rephaim,
Gibborim, Zampummim and Nephelim,
according to their several unpleasant
characteristics, succeeded in debauching
not only the Cainites, who had settled
in the field of Damascus, but the
descendants of the virtuous Seth as well.
Between the Sethite women, living in the
mountains near Eden, and the Nephi-

1 See Genesis, vi, 2.and 4.

 

 
 

nan.

INTRODUCTION

lim, love affairs became increasingly
frequent.

Prominent among the full-blooded
angels were Istehar and Azazel. Iste-
har, however, soon disappeared, to hang
himself forever between earth and
heaven, asa result of his folly in disclos-
ing to the Cainite woman Shemhazai
the magic Ineffable Name by which she
rose to heaven. But Azazel remained to
pervert womankind by his diabolical
invention of jewelry. The curse of
finery and adornment which ensued is,
no doubt, responsible for many of the
bitterest anathema of Noah.

Women since the days of Eve had
always been quick to follow a bad
example. They led the indescribable
frolics that called forth the Flood. As
an example of one who was most likely
to have called forth the patriarch’s dia-
tribes, mention might be made of Naa-

 

 
 

INTRODUCTION

of Tubal-Cain, who with her great
beauty led astray the angel Shamdon,
and bore him the devil Asmodeus.*

Not only was humankind corrupted
to evil ways, but the animals went astray
as well. In such a primitive society
exogamy was, of course, accounted one
of the most hideous vices; the animals
carried it to the point of miscegenation.
The dog mated with the wolf, the cock
with the pea fowl.”

Such was the condition of the world
when the fatal storm began. It will be
remembered by those familiar with the
biography of Methuselah that that good
man died on the day set for the Flood.
It was, therefore, postponed for seven
days, so that his family might mourn
him.® During this week the sun rose
in the West and set in the East, as a
slight token of the esteem in which the
patriarch was held.*

1 Zohar Bereshit, 55°. 2 Bereshit Rabba, xxviii, 8.

‘3 Genesis, vii, 4and1o. 4 Talmud, Sanhedrin, 108»,

 

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lia aR ASTER BERETS LRTI PE

 
 

re , : 30

INTRODUCTION

But the rains began at last on the
17th day of the month Heshwan, in the f
year of the world, 1656. The wicked
Jews, who had for an hundred and twen-
ty years scoffed at Noah’s weather pre-
dictions, began to grow anxious. For
this was no ordinary deluge. The cat-
aclysm was produced by a union of the
male waters above the firmament and the
female waters of the earth! In order
to release the former two stars were
removed from the Pleiades and streams

gushed forth to commingle with the sea.
Two suns were afterwards taken from
the Great Bear and used to plug up the
holes in the constellation.”

 

The Ark, which had been under con-
struction for some time, was built of a
single giant teak-wood tree, and accord-
ing to Ibn Abbas* was fashioned in
the form of a bird’s belly, that it might
cleave the water. It was of three stories. i

oa i 1 Pirke Rabbi Eliezer, xxiii.
2 Talmud, Berakot, 59”.
8 One of the commentators of the Koran,

 
 

INTRODUCTION

The top was for the accommodation of
the birds, the main floor for the human
beings and their provisions, while the
cellar was reserved for the beasts. Some
Oriental traditions give the place of em-
barkation as Koufah, others place the
site at near Babylon.

Noah’s family got aboard immediately
upon receiving a mystic sign that the
Deluge had commenced. This was the
pouring of a stream of water from Mrs.
Noah’s burning oven, says the Koran.
The giants became furious at the rise
of the waters, and attempted to stop
the holes through which it spurted from
the earth with their feet. But the water
was hot. Og, the King of Bashan, fear-
ing that the flood would rise over his
head, with his great hands attempted to
stop the windows of heaven, but, as we
know, to no avail. He went into the sea
and clung to the rhinoceros, which was

the only animal saved except. those in
the Ark and the fishes.

 

3

 
 

Outside the Ark there was consider-
able commotion. It was necessary to
select the proper animals out of the
hordes which appeared upon the bank.
The wicked ones attempted to force the
entrance and were thrown out by Noah’s
sons. The pious creatures, however,
knelt in obeisance as they approached
the Ark, and were thus known to have
secured a passage from on high. Noah
was kept so busy that he did not enter
the Ark till the last moment, when the
water had risen to his knees.1

The result of this exclusiveness was
that an immense congregation of birds
and beasts, reptiles and fowls camped
where the vessel was moored. As it hap-
pened, they proved of use for once in
their lives; for, when the forty days of
downpour had terrifed mankind suffi-
ciently, and some 700,000 human beings
attempted to carry the Ark by storm,
the menagerie promptly ate them all

1 Bereshit Rabba, xxxii, 6.

 

 
 

INTRODUCTION

up.t. Amongst those who perished was
Cain.”

Authorities differ as to the exact steer-
age list. We know that one pair of al-
most every species was included, and
seven pairs of the clean sacrificial ani-
mals, such as the oxen, sheep, goats and
doves. The Book of Yashar gives the
number of species of birds as 32, a cur-
iously inadequate supply, it would seem,
while the Ark included 365 different

kinds of reptiles.

The reem (rhinoceros) was too big
to get into the boat and was tied to the
Ark and swam behind.* King Og, hav-

1 Book of Yashar; section Noah. Some say that
it was the pious carnivora inside the Ark that repelled
the attack. This seems unlikely.

2 Bereshit Rabba, xxii, 12. But, according to the
Talmud, Cain was accidently killed by Tubal Cain, while
he was hunting in the fields with his father Lamech
(Son of Methusael). Tubal Cain, according to this ac-
count, on account of Cain’s horns, mistook his great,
great, great, great grandfather, walking afar off, fora
beast of prey and shot him with an arrow, Upon this,
Lamech, who was blind, clapped his hands together
in surprise and fear, killing Tubal Cain. This was the
cause of his lamentation in Genesis, iv, 2.

8 Bereshit Rabba, xxxi,13. Some say unicorn.

 

co atin ach SELLE

> mayest sO ee
Tiesto eoensih ASSET

 

 
 

INTRODUCTION

ing agreed that he and his descendants
would be man’s slaves in perpetuity,
was allowed to sit on the roof, and food
was doled out to him daily, through a
hole.t Two kinds of animals ieft the Ark,
who never entered it. The pig and the
cat were created during the voyage, one
to eat the filth that had accumulated, and
the other to rid the vessel of rats. The
pig came out of the elephant’s trunk,
and the lion sneezed forth the cat.”

One pair not in any of these cate-
gories was admitted. Falsehood, it is
told, applied for transportation, but was
denied a stateroom, as he had no com-
panion. On his way home he met Mis-
fortune, who was also anxious to em-
bark. Together they agreed to return
and live together upon these terms:
Misfortune was to have all that False-
hood earned. The pair was accepted
as passengers, and ever since that time

1 Pirke R. Eliezer xxiii. Midrash, fol. 1q.
2 Tabari, c. xli.

 

 
 

INTRODUCTION

Falsehood has been disappointed at
never being able to keep the reward of
his own industry.

Satan, also, was admitted through an
absurd blunder of Noah. ‘Tabari tells
how, when the donkey stubbornly
refused to enter, the Patriarch became
angry, and cried, ‘““Come in, thou cursed
one!” Eblis was clinging unseen to the
balky beast’s tail, and entered before
Noah saw him, When reproved, Satan
remarked, “You yourself invited me!
Am I not the accursed one?”

The roster of human beings included
eighty men and women. At least, that
number, according to Tabari? disem-
barked from the Ark. Some may, of
course, like Peregrine White, have been
born on board. First, of course, was
Noah, and his wife Naamah. She is
called variously—Bath-Enos, by Abul-
feda, and Noema by the Book of Yashar.

Later, the Gnostics asserted that she was

1 Midrash, Tehillim, vii. * Chronicle of Abou-djafar
Mohammed Tabari, tr. H. Zolenberg, p. 113.

 
f

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\

INTRODUCTION

Noria, while the Kabbalists preferred
the name Vesta. Halcal, says Eutich-
ius, Tethiri, Titheera, say others. At all
events she is known to have been the

named “The Nurse of Men.” Noah had |
married her about one hundred years
before the Flood. The Lord granted him }
but three sons, fearing that, if he begot
more, and they proved pious enough to
be saved from the Deluge, the Ark would
not be big enough to hold the family.
Curiously enough, however, opinions
differ as to the primogenity of Noah’s
three sons. The Bible, except in a single
reference,’ gives Shem as the first born
while the Talmud affirms the priority
of Japhet, so named because “God hath
enlarged us through the land.” Accord-
ing to this authority, Shem (“God hath
given me a great name on earth’) was

1 Genesis x, 21. For a more exhaustive inquiry in-
to this question, see Louis Ginzberg : ‘‘Die Haggada bei
den Kirchenvatern und in der Apokryphischen Littera-
tur,’’ p. 89,

 

 
   
 
         

  
  
 
 
 
    
   
  
    
 

    

MOSS

<A} es Th Or WATE OEeE

 

INTRODUCTION

born when Noah was five hundred and
two years old. In any event, therefore,
the three boys must have been nearly
of an age, and we may accept the Scrip-
tures for the true genealogy.
Traditions tell of a fourth son of Noah.
Abulfeda calls him Jam, while other
writers assert that he was Canaan,
although this is contrary to the account
in Genesis, which tells of Noah’s curse
on Canaan, after the wine episode. Who-
ever he was, the Koran and other authori-
ties agree that this fourth son was so
wicked as to have been excluded from
the Ark; he perished in the Flood.
There were, then, Shem and his wife
Zedeketelbab, Ham and his wife Neela-

tamauk, and Japhet and his wife
Adataneses.
1 The origin of these ladies is disputed. The

Talmud speakes of them as ‘‘the daughters of Methu-
selah.’’ It is hard to believe, however, that (even tak-
ing into account the great shortage of virtuous women
in the land, and the fact that Levi's laws concerning in-
termarriage were not yet codified), that Noah's sons
would have married their own great-aunts. The Book

 

 

oa raco es

cas A SREOD SES Bo

TINE Lag SRI x
INTRODUCTION

These eight persons, with their chil-
dren and grandchildren, occupied the
first cabin. More exactly, the first
cabins; for, on account of the solemnity Ce
of the cataclysm, the sexes were sep- §
arated in the Ark, Quaker fashion.
Only Ham, among human beings, re-
fused to part from his wife. His bad
example was followed by the dog and
the raven.

Besides these living passengers, the
Ark carried one dead. This was the
corpse of Adam. Eutychius, writing in
the tenth century, and quoting from
apocryphal writings now destroyed, says
that Noah and his three sons went to the
Cave of Elcanuz and bore off the body
of the first man.’ Fabricius says

of Yashar is probably more correct in stating that they
were the daughters of Methuselah’s son Eliakim.
Eutychius gives other names, viz.: The wife of Shem,
Salith; of Ham, Nahlath; of Japhet, Arisivah. Euty-
chius Annals, ed. Selden, I, p. 35.

1 Talmud, Sanhed., 108°,

2 Other legends have it that Adam’s body was
washed out ofits grave by the flood. (Bereshit Rabba,
Xxii, 12.)

 

 

 
 

INTRODUCTION

that it was, after the Flood, reinterred
on Golgotha; but, according to Abul-
faraj, Noah directed Shem and Melchiz-
edek, son of Peleg, to deposit the re-
mains on a hill, afterwards to become
the site of Jerusalem.

In the six months afloat the Ark en-
circled the globe. Of the adventures on
board ship, Shem, many years later, gave
Eliezer, the servant of Abram, many
curious reminiscences. The zitka, he
said, was used to feed on pomegran-
ates. One day when Noah was cutting
one open for him, a worm dropped out,
which the zitka immediately devoured.
He liked it so well that he insisted that
the patriarch breed more, and Noah was
forced to knead bran daily for that pur-
pose. The lion suffered terribly from
fever. One day, Noah having neglected
to feed him, he gave the old man a
vicious slap with his paw. Noah was
lame ever after—and so, not being phys-

* Weil, Biblische Legende der Muselmanner; p. 4s.

 

 
 

INTRODUCTION

ically perfect, could not officiate as
priest at the thank-offering which he
sacrificed upon disembarking. Shem had
to take his place.t The urshana (a
fabulous animal), on the other hand
made so little trouble that Noah blessed
him so that he should keep alive for
ever.” He is still, occasionally, to be
seen in the neighborhood of Jerusalem.

In still another way Noah begana new
epoch. Up to this time the human in-
habitants of the earth were vegetarians.
Noah was the first to eat meat. Whether
this was a really direct revelation from
the Lord,® or a diet suggested by an
insufficient granary on the Ark, is not
known. But the fact may account for
the disappearance of several extinct
species whose fossil remains have con-
jured various theories from the geolo-
gists. Did Noah’s family dine on masta-

1 Tanhuma; Noah, ed, Amst, 10”,
2 Talmud, Sanhed., 108.

3 As is indicated in Genesis, ix, 3.

 

 
 

INTRODUCTION

don and dinausaur steaks? Did they
discover a toothsome relish in fried
ichthiosaurus? Who can tell? We know
only that temptation was at hand—and
that many species are no more.

So much for home life aboard the Ark.
The vessel reached its destination, on
the 27th day of the month Kislew, on
the summit of Mt. Ararat, or, as other
authorities name the place, Mt. Lubar.
After waiting for some time for the
waters to settle and the mud to dry
up, the emigrants were able to stretch
their legs. The mountain was descended,
and eighty houses were built, one for
each person coming out of the Ark.?

After the first thank-offering men-
tioned above, Noah planted the vine.’
It sprouted, blossomed, fruited and the
grapes were crushed into wine all in one
day—for Noah himself had skill in

1 Tabari, p. 113.

2 The vine was, according to the Talmud, the
‘forbidden fruit’ of Eden,

 

 

 
 

We

DUCTION

INTRO
sorcery. His wisdom came from his
possession of the magic book, the Torah.

The unfortunate result of Noah’s
wine-making is partly described in the
Book of Genesis. But this account lets
Ham off far more lightly than he de-
served. The part he played in the affair
according to more specific chroniclers
was sufficient to warrant the curse his
descendants writhe under to this day.
Still their faces are black from his sin,
still their hair is twisted, as their miser-
able ancestor twisted his inquisitive
head.

Noah himself should have known bet-
ter, for he had on that memorable day
received a fair warning from no less a
person than Eblis, the Prince of Dark-
ness,

Noah, it appears, was busy planting
his first vine when Satan strolled by.
“What are you doing?” asked the Evil
One.

“TI am planting a vine, for the refresh-

 

 
 

 

INTRODUCTION

ment of mankind, so that men may drink
of the juice of the grape and be com-
forted.”

“Is that so?” Satan replied. “Let me
help you.” With that he brought a kid,
killed it, and sprinkled the blood upon
the roots of the plant.

“What is that for?’ Noah asked.

“So that man, when he has drunk
wine, may be gay and sportive.” So
spake the Devil.

Another vine was planted, and, this
time, Satan killed a lion. “So that,” he
explained, “man may be bold when he
is intoxicated.”

Satan with a grin sprinkled upon the
roots of a third plant the blood of a
swine. His explanation will go without
saying.t In spite of this lesson Noah
that same evening drank too much!

Shortly after this disgraceful episode,
the family scattered. Their increase and

1 For varying versions of this legend, see Yalkut,
Noah, Ixi, Machiri, in Psalms, civ. 143, and Tanhuma;
Noah 12.

 

 

 

 
 

INTRODUCTION

multiplication demanded an expanded
territory. Ham, never cordially liked,
after his display of bad taste was sent
to the Southwest, where his descend-
ants spread over Palestine, which was
settled by Aram, into Egypt, and under
the leadership of Phut, Mizraim and
Cush, along the northern shores of
Africa. Raahmah, Ham’s grandson, led
some into Arabia, where they settled
along the Indian Ocean and the Persian
Gulf.

Shem, Noah’s favorite son, kept to
western Arabia and Persia. Here dwelt
Elam, Assur, Arphaxad, Lud and Aram,
and great kingdoms were founded:
Babylonia and Assyria and Chaldea.

The North, from Greece to Thibet—
all the country about the Black and Cas-
pian and Azov seas, was invaded and
settled by the sons of Japhet—Gomer
and Magog and Madai, and Javan and
Tubal and Meschech and Tiras.

It will be easily seen, therefore, that

 

 
 

Ls eWay

INTRODUCTI

‘ Noah had before he died a much great-
- er range of country for his investigation
than did his grandfather Methuselah in
his antediluvian rovings. Roughly all
between 10° and 50° North Latitude and
10° and 60° Longitude East from Green-
wich were his to study. We would
expect from him, therefore, a more
various experience with women. When
we consider the fact of his long bachelor-
hood—nearly five hundred years—it will
be easily believed that his opinions of
the frail sex should be even more valu-
able than those of his grandfather.

Less caustic they are, certainly, if
more subtle. The intimate family life
on board the Ark evidently made him a
bit more lenient with women’s faults
than was Methuselah. From his daugh-
ters-in-law, that year, he no doubt for-
mulated much of his opinion of married
women. For the virgins, damsels and
maidens of his good-natured satire he
was probably indebted to the antedi-

 

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INTRODUCTION

luvian women of the Land of Nod and ;
districts hard by Eden. How much ob- #
servation was helped by intuition, how
much by the wisdom of the Torah we
cannot say. But, knowing his fondness
for a good time, we cannot but suspect
that Naamah his wife, the other lovely
Naahmah and the clever Shemhazai con-
tributed largely to his education.

As in the case of the Maxims of
Methuselah, these of Noah’s are freely

translated into the idiom of the present
day, an attempt being to give a feeling
of actuality rather than a literal present-
ment of the archaic conditions of civili-

zation. It is impossible for us to take
a woman of the early Assyrian empire
seriously, and the curly-bearded men of
that period seem as impossible as the
winged lions they carved. But, under
the dark skin of those fierce women
abode the same primitive females who
lurk beneath the powder and vermeil
of our latter-day barbarism. Noah him-

 

 
 

INTRODUCTION

self speaks of the ultra-female psychol-
ogy inherent or latent in all women, as
being revealed in psychosis. Culture,
wealth or talent may overlay the wo-
man-creature as with a garment, but, as
the man’s character is revealed in wine,
so iS woman’s in moments of anger,
fear or passion. These and _ similar
emotions are atavistic. It is at such
moments that we must surprisedly dis-
cover in all her sharp intensity the

primordial women of Noah’s Maxims.

GELETT BURGESS

May 1, 191%

 

 
THE MAXIMS OF
NOAH

Chapter t

The proper understanding of woman avatleth
men mightily. 4 Divers precepts concerning
her ways. 7 A woman's subtilty in roping
in her victim shewn in a parable.

Y SON, consider the ways of
women and be wise; for he
who knoweth them not is as
one who walketh blindfold over fly-
paper; he shall become sore entangled.
2 From women mayest thou learn
of women; even from her who fooleth ,
thee shalt thou know how others would wa
fain fool thee.
3 For men are comrades one with

 

 

 
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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 1.

another; they give not away the game;
but every woman’s hand is against her
sister, and her ways are made plain.

4 @To a woman, the man she loveth
is even as an infant; behold, she humor-
eth him like a child. For he is vain, full
of importance and noise, even as the
babe within her arms.

5 The fool sayeth unto a woman:
Why gettest thou not a hat [the Miss
Smith’s? But he who avoideth trouble
speaketh warily of her raiment.

6 Wouldst thou discover the primi-
tive female in all women? Go to the
woman with nerves, and she shall teach
thee psychology. Yea, when she weep-
eth, when she waileth and gnasheth her
teeth, when hysterics come upon her,
then shall she slow thee what lies
hidden in all women.

7 @ Now on a time a woman smiled
upon me, saying: Dost thou love me?

8 And I said unto her: Nay, I love
thee not.

 

 
THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 1.

g Yet again she came unto me, say-
ing: Dost thou not love me?

to And I said: Nay, have I not told
thee? I love thee not.

11 And the third time the woman
came cunningly, and she wept, saying: If
thou wilt only pretend that thou lovest
me, then will my heart be assuaged.

12 And my heart softened and my
will became as water, and I said unto
her: Lo, if it pleaseth thee that I should
deceive thee, then will I surely say: Be-
hold, I love thee. But I mean it not.

13 And when I had said it she fas-
tened her eyes upon me, and I could not
depart from her; seventy and seven were
the years of my captivity, wherein every
day she said:

14 Lo, hast thou not said unto me:
I love thee? Wherefore seekest thou to
depart? Thou art bound unto me.

15 And I gnashed my teeth and rent
my hair, desiring to slay her; for great
was her guile.

 

 
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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 2.

Chapter it
Women’s immemorial bromides. 2 A watter’s
ways compared to those of awoman. 5 How
to rule over women, 9 Insult and flattery
both excellently practisedby women. 12 Two
views of the female sex.

F THE women who have said
unto me: Lo, I will tell thee
what I have dared tell no other

man, have I counted upward of six hun-
dred; and of them who said: Thou
understandeth me as hath no man, behold,
the wilderness would not hold them.
2 My son, observe the waiter at
the restaurant, how he studieth his
victims, searching out their weaknesses,
that his tips may be large. Lo, I say
unto thee, so doth a woman study her
prey that she may accomplish her will.
3 Whether he liketh blue’ she
noticeth, and if he admire green it
doth not escape her; the books that he

 

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THE LESSON OF THE WAITER:
CHOOSING THE KISSABLE; XVI, 6.

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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 2.

readeth doth she read also, and if perad-
venture he hate onions, she is aware of
it.

4 She observeth his ways, saying:
Ha, ha, when the time cometh, then shall
I work him.

5 @ My son, if a woman love thee
give her many commandments. Say
unto her: Yhow shalt drink no coffee,
and she shall keep thy word. Rule her
as a slave, and she shail love thee.

6 Yet shalt thou command her only
regarding those things she would fain in
anywise do; prevent her not when her
mind is set.

7 For in small things woman would
obey a master, yea, she rejoiceth in her
slavery; but he who forceth a woman
against her will, he shall encounter a live
wire; his love will be shocked.

8 Many a maiden have I known
who could catch mice in their fingers,
but of them that could nof trim hats @
better than her milliner, nay, not one. ;

 

 

 

 

 
THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 2.

9 Q@Who is so rude as an insolent z
woman, and what man dareth utter her a
insults? Her tongue is barbed and is /@
baited with friendliness; she knoweth
not shame. For behold, she hath but ?
one weapon, but a man hath two fists.

Io Yet when she flattereth thee, she
surpasseth all boldness; she buttereth
thee as with butter, yea, she layeth it on
thick. And man lappeth it up, he eateth
of her praise greedily, he calleth for
more.

11 What man can compete with a
woman when she serveth out the honey;
and when she handeth out the vinegar
who can equal her?

12 @ Now of men who seek to under-
stand women there are but two schools:
those who regard them as angels, and are
decetved; and those who consider them
as devils and are amused.

13 At the trunk store, there is evera ,
bargain sale; so with a woman’s age, it '
is always marked down.

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Chapter ti

1 In an example of his own experience, Noah
sheweth the desperate simplicity of a young
man, 2 with a highbrow of perfervent tem-
perament, 10 and with a cold-blooded actor-
tne. 17 His untimely end.

OW IN the Land of Nod there

N was a youth, and he was named

Gazabe, which, being interpreted,
signifieth He who Putteth in his Foot;

2 And by the side of the Tigris he
came upon a woman reading a tablet.

3 Her eyes were bluer than the ice
of the Antarctic, and the height of her
brow was great, for she was a college
graduate. Six degrees had she taken,
and all her ways were chaste.

4 And the youth wooed her, say-
ing: Lo, how I respect thee; thy wisdom
maketh me to be afraid. Thou art purer
than the lilies, therefore let not my touch &@
sully thee. Let us reason together.

 

 

 
 

 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 3.

5 And she said unto him: Go thy
way, thou simple one,

6 For I desire not to be respected,
neither do I regard platonic friendship.
My learning is a curse unto me, and as
for my degrees they are not worth a hair-
pin.

7 Alas, where is he who dareth to
seize me by the hair of my. head, drag-
ging me into his cave; and as for him
who shall beat me until I become enam-
ored, why cometh he not?

8 For a romantic lover have I not
yet seen; and he who wooeth with a
vengeance is a minus quantity to me.

9 And Gazabe marveled mightily,
saying: What aileth me, that I have
played the yap with this damsel? And
he held up his right hand, swearing:
Never again.

10 @ And he awoke as from a dream,
and went down into Babylonia. And
after he had journeyed ten days he came
upon a damzel gazing into a mirror.

 

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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 3.

And she was an actorine; her name was
Maybelle.

11 Her hair was stained with henna,
and upon her fingers were many rings.
Of rouge and divers unguents had she
used ten measures.

1z And Gazabe said unto Maybelle:
Lo, thou art a pomegranate, thy form is
exceeding fine: thy perfect garment
fitteth thee, and thy feet are smaller
than mice. There is none like unto
thee.

13 And he put his arms about her
and gathered her in; yea, before she was
aware, he kissed her upon the lips might-
ily, so that men heard the noise thereof.

14 And she smote him upon the face,
saying:

15 Lo, because I am an actorine shalt
thou not respect me? And if I wear

tights upon the stage, is there no virtue
in me?

16 Alas, where is he who shall be a
brother unto me, and who is the man

 
        
   
    

 

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THE MAXIMS O

who shall be my friend? For my heart
sickeneth for knowledge, and I would
fain discourse of the Fourth Dimension.

17 @ And Gazabe departed from that
land, and shaved his head; even unto
the Hoboites did he make his way. Upon
his head he cast ashes, and of sackcloth
were his trousers.

Chapter th

1 General observations about women. 6 Three
insignificant things to which women attach
importance. 10 Women never to be wholly
known, 13 but have many easily discernible
traits. 13 Women fond of repeating the
compliments they have received.

EAR, YE CHILDREN, the in-
struction of a father, and attend
my words: for the lips of a flat-

tering woman drop as the honeycomb,

and her mouth is smoother than oil.

2 As one who putteth sugar upon oys-
ters, so is he who feedeth lies to a woman
who loveth him; they will not go down.

 

 
  

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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 4.

3 As alum to the mouth, as a pebble
in the shoe, so is a woman who telephon-
eth thee overmuch.

4 As hard butter upon a hot plate, as
a slippery rug upon a hardwood floor, so
is one woman’s opinion of another.

5 Crumbs in the bed may be endured,
and an eyelash may be removed from
the eye: but she who is always tardy
causeth anguish continually.

6 @There be three things which are
little amongst men, but to women they
are exceeding great:

7 Crow’s feet are passing small, yet
do women make much of them;

8 A ring is of little compass, yet it
circleth a woman’s life;

9 I love you are short words, and eas-
ily said; yet do women prize them.

1o @Boast not thyself to know
women, for thou knowest not what the
next damsel shall teach thee.

11 @ Where no gasolene is, there the
motor stoppeth; and when a man is

 

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 5.

married, then do the virgins forsake
him.

12 Knowest thou a man who is sub-
tile to please women? Lo, he shall be
counted amongst those present. Seest
thou a youth diligent with old women?
Behold, his way is made smooth.

13 @Knowest thou the land where
the damsels eschew confectionery and
the young men know not the baseball
scores? There alone shalt thou find the
damsel who repeateth not unto her lover
the compliments she hath received.

Chapter b

1 Of a youth who paid an unpardonable compli-
ment, 5 andadamsel whose workwas lumpy.
9 Women in automobiles. 10 Their prejudice
Ml and modesty. 13 Beauty excuseth sole-
cisms.

ND BEHOLD, there was a virgin

in Babylon, who had a lover; and
she desired much to be fair in
/ his sight;

 

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 5.

2 And after she had spent three
hours at the mirror, with rats and puffs
and cold cream, and face powder, and
rouge, and myrrh and spikenard and
divers unguents, she descended unto the
parlor and welcomed him, saying: Good
evening, I hope I have not kept thee
long.

3 And he rose and looked at her with
wide eyes, and he said: Lo, how intel-
lectual thou lookest!

4 And she rent her hair and gnashed
her teeth, and would not be comforted.
And she hated that young man forever
after because of his insult.

5 And on a time a certain damsel
said unto me: Lo, a strange thing have I
heard from my neighbor: but surely
thou wilt be wroth if I tell thee.

6 But I pressed her sore, saying:
Nay, nay, tell thou me, for I desire much
to know it.

7 Then she answered and said: Be-
hold, three matrons have asked me if I

 

 
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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 5.

were engaged to thee. Is it not absurd?

8 And I fled away from that damsel,
yea, unto a far place.

9 @As milk which hath been
skimmed, or as coffee without cream, so
is an automobile ride without a comely
damsel.

10 As one who biteth upon sandpaper,
so is he who striveth against a woman’s
prejudice.

11 When a virgin beginneth to lose
her modesty, it goeth like a silk skirt;
yea, as a silk stocking which hath begun
to run, it goeth with exceeding great
speed.

12 As an ice cream soda at a cheap
drug store, so is she who loveth not her
bath; and as for her who weareth a
soiled shirt waist, she is like unto the
carnation which hath turned to magenta.

13 QA comely damsel may eat with
her fingers and it shall be forgiven her;
but cuteness abideth not in the matron
when she hath waxed fat.

 

 
Chapter bi

{ Noah, in the story of Dub of Nod, and Bessie,
the good-looker of Hiddekel, sheweth how ex-
ceeding little can be learned of wotnen’s tem-
porary behavior as a predicate of her future |}
conduct. 12 What women can win, 13 and }
what women can keep men. 34 Table man-
ners \5 and ratlroad etiquette. 17 The one
useless question.

OW THERE was a youth who
N lived in the Land of Nod, on

the east of Eden, and his name
was Dub, which is to say: He who is
slow in the head.

2 And he fell enamored of a maiden
who dwelt by the river Hiddekel; and
her name was Bessie.

3 Now it came to pass that Dub in-
vited the damsel to sit at meat with him
in a public place, and as they sate wait-
ing they listened to the sound of loud
timbrels and saw much people.

 

 

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 6.

4 And as they devoured their lobster
a virgin entered that place and took her
seat at the next table. And behold, she
was passing fair, her form was the form
of an artist’s model, and her face was
like unto a cover of the Saturday Even-
ing Post.

5 And it came to pass that when Dub
had gazed long at the virgin he smiled
and said unto Bessie: Is the virgin not
comely, and findeth she not favor in thy
sight? Verily, I say unto thee: She is
a peach.

6 And Bessie regarded the virgin as
if she had seen her not, and she an-
swered, saying: Of a truth thou hast
spoken aright; surely the virgin is ex-
ceeding fair. Yea, she hath dove’s eyes,
and her cheeks are as pomegranates un-
der a lamp of silver. Behold, her hair is
as the shadow of a wall of jasper when
night falleth, and her teeth are as a
string of pearls whereof each one is
perfect.

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 6.

7 And Dub smiled in his folly,
saying: Now surely he is a fool who
saith: Ajf women are jealous and know
not how to approve virtue. Behold, I
will publish thy magnanimity before all
men, for thou art a woman of ten thou-
sand; thou canst praise another woman.

8 And they arose and left that place;
and Dub thrust out his chest.

9 But as for Bessie, her smile was the
smile of one who holdeth the poles of
an electric battery.

1o And it came to pass that Dub
called upon Bessie after that time sev-
enty and seven times, and she was _ nof
at home.

ir For she had cast him out into utter
darkness, and his name was known no
more in her house.

12 (A maiden of even ways may win
a man’s love, but as for her who sway-
eth men’s hearts to move them unto
her bidding, she hath a temper of fire
and water.

 

 
THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 6.

13 Lo, men have said unto me: Any
woman by diligence can capture any
man; but I say unto thee: Verily, verily,
it taketh a woman of subtilty to keep
him in bondage.

14 My son, when thou invitest thy
love to dinner, let thine order be much,
and thine appetite little,

15 And when thou escortest her to
and fro, watch not for the station, nor
descend till thou hast passed it,

16 That she may think pleasantly of
thee when she is alone, saying: Hath he
not forgotten all save my presence? Lo,
how he loveth me!

17 @ Ask not one damsel’s age of an-
other, lest the wise mock thee, and the
old men say: Go to, thou simpleton,
where is that which thou wilt not
believe?

18 Wild eyes hath a woman, when she
gazeth into a milliner’s window; but
when second wife meeteth first wife, be-
hold her eyes are as diamonds.

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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 7.

Chapter vtt

\ Divers observation about women. 6 Three
things women fear. 8 True love always inar-
ticulate, 11 and full of moods. 12 Desperate
expedient of a vain woman.

AKE HEED lest thou speak not

to one woman concerning another,

otherwise thou shalt have no re-
ward of the subtile;

2 But when thou goest amongst
women, let not thy Jeff girl know what
thy right girl doeth.

3 My son, many a damsel is a kitten
with men, who is a cat with women.

4 As one who seeketh to fold a news-
paper in a high wind, so is he who argu-
eth with an angry woman.

5 As a high-necked damsel at a ball,
so is love without danger; and a fair
maiden without wit is like unto a pair
of cleaned gloves, she lasteth but a day.

6 @ There be two times in a woman’s

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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 7.

life when she is afraid, yea, three when
her heart faileth:

7 When she discovereth her first gray
hair; when she meeteth her husband’s
old love; and when a babe is born unto
her, and she saith: Js the child perfect ?

8 (The damsel who hateth thee
greeteth thee with soft words, saying:

9 Behold, I am exceeding glad that
thou hast come, thou rejoicest mine
eyes; lo, surely it was sweet of thee to
call;

to But as for her who loveth thee, lo,
she runneth to the door, she holdeth thy
two hands, saying only: Oh, Ned!

11 @ For an unchanging affection is a
vain pretence, it meaneth nothing; but
true love hath moods and manners.

12 Q@ Now a maiden said unto me:
Behold, every one I have met to-day hath
stared at me with his eyes, so that I
was fain to enter and look into my
mirror, lest a spot were on my counte-
nance, Yet was there no blemish on me!

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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 8.

13 Then I laughed in my beard, think-
ing, O, thou fool, thus wouldst thou
advertise thy comeliness.

Chapter biti

1. A wife's jealousy wreaked not on her hushand,
but the other woman. 6 How women appraise
their rivals. 10 The parable of Katharine and
Trixie, shewing 48 the three languages spoken
by women.

HAVE OBSERVED a wife when
I her husband talketh with a subtile

woman, and I have regarded her

ways.

2 And it came to pass that when the
woman gazed admiringly at him, then
did the wife care not; nay, she rejoiced
with an exceeding great joy, saying:
Lo, how she envieth me! _

3 But if peradventure fe were de-
lighted with the damsel, when he looked
at her with the corners of his eyes, when

 

 
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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 8.

his lips smiled upon her, then was his
wife angry, yea, she waxed exceeding
wroth,

4 Yet to her husband did she say
naught, she disclosed not her jealousy;

5 But out of the woman she took it in
divers subtile ways, driving her forth
with a tongue of needles. But her hus-
band knew if not, comprehending not
women’s ways.

6 @ Behold, when one woman meet-
eth another, she weigheth her rival as
in a balance; she measureth her as with
an ell.

7 And if peradventure she is found
wanting, then is she welcomed with
fond words, the path is made easy to
her feet,

8 But if she surpassefh in charm, if
her comeliness exceed, then doth it go
hard with her; yea, she is treated with
silent scorn.

g For all women practise the same
trade, and therein are no Unions found.

 

 

 
THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 8.

10 {Now there were two damsels in
the Land of Nod, and their names were
Katharine and Trixie. They had been |
friends since their youth, yea, they slept
in the same bed together.

11 And it came to pass that one day }
when a youth came to call, Katharine }
tarried in tne parlor privily, and she
heard him announced.

12 Therefore, before he had entered
the room, she hid behind a screen, wish-
ing to know wherefore he was in that
house. And he knew not that she was
there.

13 And lo, a damsel entered unto him,
and they talked together, the youth and
the damsel; and she beguiled him with
honeyed words, she was exceeding gra-
cious.

14 And when the youth had departed,
Katharine came from behind the screen
to discover the maiden; and behold, it
was Trixie.

15 And Katharine was sore amazed,

 

 
 

 

 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 8.

saying: What signifieth it that I have
known thee lo, these many years, and I
knew not thy voice? Behold, since my
youth hast thou been my friend, and yet
I did not recognize thee !

16 Thy ways were the ways of a
stranger, and the tones of thy voice were
different altogether.

17 And Trixie answered her, saying:
Behold, was I not alone with a man, not
knowing that a woman was near by?
Lo, thou hast mach to learn of women!

18 @For there be two languages a
woman speaketh, yea, three to which her
tongue is accustomed:

19 The speech of women together:
and the speech of a woman with a man:
but the speech of a woman with a man
and a woman, it is another language.

20 @My son, when thou sayest: All
women are liars, it is easy to thee,

21 But he who perceiveth when they
are lying, I say unto thee, he is a man of
understanding.

 

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 9.

Chapter ix

The foolish fond woman. 3 Women’s and

men’s humor dependeth upon their experience.
5 The patriarch exhorteth to caution in credultty.
8 He persuadeth the simple to learn of women’s
gutle, 13 and use hisown wiles upon them.

15 The female doctor. 16 Thin hair.

S A LEAKY hot water bottle

in a time of need, so is a fond

woman that telleth thy secrets;
her folly exceedeth her comfort.

2 @Because she knoweth not base-
ball, many a woman hath been accused
of a lack of humor; and when she under-
standeth not business, then do men say
Fie, fie, thou art a fool.

3 But when her husband is deceived

switch, when the innocent young damsel
imposeth upon his credulity, then she
laugheth full well; she maketh merry
with him, saying:

 

 
 

 

 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 9.

4 Where nowis thy sense of humor
whereof thou hast boasted unto me!

And how mighty is thy cunning wherein ‘s

thou hast excelled! For lo, any woman
can fool thee: thou art but a man.

5 QMy son, observe the guile of
women and be not deceived: learn her
ways and be wise,

6 For thou knowest not that, when
thou callest, her entrance hath been re-
hearsed and the lights of the room ar-
ranged,

7 And as for the accident that lend-
eth her charm, lo, it hath been oft prac-
tised before her mirror.

8 (Now on a time I flirted with a
maiden at a picnic, and as we talked
together, lo, her hair fell from her head,
yea, it streamed down wondrously upon
her shoulders, and many were the curls
thereof.

9 And she became ashamed; she

 

begged my pardon, saying: Lo, I can

 
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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 9.

never keep my hair up; what shalt thou
think of me?

to But I answered, saying: Nay, bind
it not up; leave it thus, for it well
becometh thee.

iz And the other women smiled bit-
terly one at another; their look was the
look of one who drinketh water after
eating cranberries.

12 For I knew not that her hairpins
had been loosened privily, and that thus
did she with every man.

13 @Son, when thou hast neglected a
damsel, call not upon her till the wind
riseth and the rains descend; yea, in
the blizzard shalt thou make thy visit,

14 That she may say: Lo, surely he
must desire to see me, that he hath ven-
tured in this storm; yea, he loveth me
full well.

15 4] What is more disappointing than
to find an interesting woman is called
“Mrs.’”’? and for a comely damsel to be
a doctor, I cannot bear it.

 

 
 

 

 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 10.

16 Thin hair is an abomination to a
woman, but a secret sorrow is her
delight.

Chapter x

1 Despite women's subtilty, man in the end pre-
vaileth. 3 The helpfulenemy 4 andthe harm-
ful friend. 5 Woman’s vanity 7 and envy.
10 An exhortation to audacity.

FLYING MACHINE is heavier

than air, yet it rideth with ease

upon the wind; and women are
quick of wit, yet shall men of under-
standing prevail over them.

2 My son, he who hath a sister shall
hear words more cruel than a camera,
yet shall he learn the ¢rath.

3 Give heed to thine enemy, for so
shalt thou learn thy fault to correct it;

4 But beware the damsel who flatter-
eth thee, and of her who calleth thee
different, shalt thou have a care.

5 (A man with small feet hideth

 

 
 

ty

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 10.

them not, and she whose hands are well
formed delighteth to play chess.

6 Why doth the virgin rejoice? Why
readeth she her love letters to her
sisters? Behold, I say unto thee, there
is a compliment therein, and it shall not
be concealed.

7 @ Enthusiastic is women’s praise of
a passable damsel; yea, they lift up their
voices continually, saying, Lo, she hath
fine eyes. But when she who dazzleth
men’s sight approacheth, behold, their
tongues are hushed, they whisper one to
another in their confusion, confessing
her comeliness.

8 As a man with his first automobile,
so is an old wife with a young husband;
she is fond, yet fearful.

g The shop-damsel extolleth her
wares, saying, Lo, [ myself wear this
kind. And the customer smileth bit-
terly, and turneth away.

io Toa clever woman, a man without
audacity is a weariness to the spirit;

 

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 11.

and as for the timid youth who obeyeth
her, lo, she sendeth him upon errands.

Chapter xt

1 Ina parable, the patriarch telleth the manner of
a vain woman's love. 4 Zerah’s jealousy and
17 her lamentations. 19 She preferreth her
lover's misfortune rather than her own eclipse.
21 Divers wise observations.

OW THERE was a damsel in

Assyria, and her name was

Zerah, which is to say, She who

despiseth not herself. And she was
enamored of a youth.

2 And it came to pass that her lover
journeyed into the land of Havilah, and
he wrote to her letters daily. And
every day Zerah answered him twenty
and four pages.

3 And on a day he met a virgin, and
he wrote to Zerah concerning her, say-
ing: She is very interesting.

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 11.

4 And when Zerah read it, she waxed
exceeding wroth, and she rent her gar-
ments, crying, Behold, he is faithless
unto me; he hath deserted me for a
strange woman. For thus and not
otherwise would he call her interesting.

5 Therefore shall I arise and attire
myself like a New Yorker, and follow
after him, yea, unto Havilah. And
when it shall come to pass that I have
encountered the woman, and if she be
not more comely than I, then shall I
chastise her sore and bear him away.
But if peradventure she be more comely
than I, then must I fz in submit unto her,
and go my way.

6 For to a woman (but they are vain
words) beauty is the sole adversary.

7 And when it came to pass that her
lover wrote not for seven days, Zerah
was cast down and would not be com-
forted; yea, her heart was heavy, and
she ceased not her lamentations.

8 But on the seventh day it came to

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 11.

pass that there came another letter,
wherein it was written:

9 Lo, for six days have I been ill unto
death, and my pain was exceeding
heavy upon me, so that I gnashed my
teeth continually. And they that
watched beside me in the hospital mar-
velled that I passed not away. There-
fore have I not written thee.

to And when Zerah read his words
she laughed a great laugh, and sprang
up rejoicing, saying, Behold she hath
not vanquished me. It was naught but
a sickness, wherefore is my heart glad.
And she girt her loins and descended
unto the city and bought a hat. And
for the plume thereof she paid an hun-
dred shekels. :

11 QA whip for a horse, a bridle for
an ass, and a rival for the woman in
love.

12 As an elocutionist in a hot parlor,
so is he who repeateth the point of a

 

joke; and as for her who sayeth, How

 
THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 12.

much thinkest thou I paid for this ? she
is like unto corn-starch ice-cream in a
thick saucer, whereof the edges are
bitten.

Chapter xti

Four unbearable things. 3 Man's frankness and
4 Woman's weak complaisance. 5 of adamsel
who dyed her hair. 8 The signs of a froward
woman. 10 Four joyful things.

OR THREE THINGS is the
earth disquieted; yea, for four
which it cannot bear:

2 For a man with a pale-blue necktie;
and a woman whose corsets shew forth
' an horizontal line; for a man with a
diamond ring, and a woman that pluck-
eth not the hairs from her mole.

3 I observed a youth from my win-
dow, and, behold, he offered cigarettes
to his neighbor. And his friend shook
shis head, and refused them, saying:
Nay, they are rotten fain would I smoke

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 12.

mine own. And I marvelled, seeing
their love was not diminished.

4 And there came a damsel straight-
way bearing a box of confections. And,
behold, she opened the box to her
friends, and they partook of it gladly,
saying, O, how lovely / But when she
was gone away, then did they complain
ene to the other, saying: My, wasn’t it
awful |

5 QSon, in my youth I walked by the

banks of the Tigris, and I came up on
a damsel kneeling beside a basin of dark
waters; and she was shampooing her
hair.

6 And I said unto her: Hail, sister,
long have I sought thee; for surely
thou art she who dyeth her hair.

7 And she lifted up her voice and
reviled me, saying: Nay, nay, say not
so concerning me, for it is false. Yet,
if I pass it through the /ast water of
rinsing wherein is a leaf of henna, shall
I not preserve its nafural color?

RSAC ERIS NAS EI VU

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 12.

8 (Not every damsel winketh that
filleth her bosom with ruffles; but as
for her who weareth earrings and high
Suéde shoes, I say unto thee, she is a
froward woman.

g9 As one who pulleth a_bureau-
drawer that sticketh, so is he that argu-
eth with an angry damsel; thou canst
not budge her.

10 @There be three things which
cause a woman joy; yea, four at which
she saith unto herself, Thank God !

11 To be told she resembleth an act-
ress; to be chosen of a man whereof
it hath been said, Lo, no woman can
suit him;

12 .To hear her lover flatter her in
public; and to hear her rival called
intellectual.

13 For a woman to be suspected of
folly is as a bracelet of gold upon the
wrist; but to be convicted of wrong-
doing is a handcuff whereof the grip is

 

 
 

 

 

Chapter xi

§ Noah, in divers proverbs, sheweth woman's
various weaknesses. 33 A revelation of her
shamelessness.

S A WAITER that loitereth at
the table, desiring a tip, so is
she that demandeth of thee,

Why hast thou kissed me?

2 As one that picketh his teeth behind

a napkin, so is he that would fain con-

ceal his weakness from a woman. He

maketh his folly conspicuous.
3 Asa shaker full of damp salt, so is

a woman when thou recountest thy

deeds; yet, when she talketh of herself,

she is like unto a pepperpot, whereof
the cover is loose and spilleth mightily.
4 As a hairpin that hath fallen down
her neck, so is the sight of a rival’s new
gown to a woman; it irketh her sore,
yet can she not forget it.
5 Boiled milk is an abomination, and

 
the stink of pease cooking is disgusting
to me; but she that putteth scent into
her husband’s tobacco-jar causeth his;
friends to say harsh things.

a hair-tonic upon thee, so is an ill-fa-
vored damsel that reciteth the compli-
ments she hath received.

into a bottle, so is the mind of her that
nurseth her first-born; thou canst not
attain unto it.

8 He that pulleth up his trousers '
before sitting, and she that powdereth |
her nose in public, who shall choose i
between them?

9 As one that readeth the last chapter
of a novel first, so is she that asketh
thee, Dost thou not love me ?

10 A singing gas-jet can I bear, yea,
a faucet which squeaketh is not intoler-
able to me; but she that hummeth mer- ©
rily out of tune causeth me sore anguish. %

11 QLo, mine eye trickleth down with

 
ZAWSAS

    
         
   
     
   

2S.

ASABE UIE

oR er ML Ge SSS

 

    
     
   
     
 
 
   

  

water for the frowardness of the daugh-
ters of my people. I am in distress; my
bowels are troubled.

12 Hath a woman shame? Hath a
woman modesty withal? Behold, as a
man thinketh, thinketh she not; and
with a gentleman’s reserves is she not
acquainted.

13 For in the house of women, there = x
I caused a dictagraph to be established;
and when its records were made known,
then was I astonished. s

14 She discusseth her husband; and :
to her sisters doth she reveal many :
curious things. j

i
i

 

Re

Sr oA aba ECE UR Re

15 She discourseth of her operations;

 

yea, as she passeth the sandwiches, as aN
she announceth her trumps, even then | j ‘ \ P
doth she proclaim them. di ia bs i

16 She fisheth openly for men; and
though her sisters witness her guile, yet
is she not embarrassed.

17 When she putteth in her switch,
when she anointeth herself. with rouge,

 

 
when she stuffeth herself with ruffles,
behold, then she jesteth with her sisters;
yea, they rejoice together and say ha-ha.

18 And as for her wiles with her
beloved, and the words of his mouth,
doth she not bandy them about, that her
sisters may praise her?

19 But when a man cometh, then is
she demure; she casteth down her eye-
lids, she blusheth mightily. Behold,
butter melteth not in her mouth.

Chapter xiv

1 The dangers of propinguity. 3 Women prone
to be bored. 5 Anticipation excelleth realization.
7 In a parable Noah sheweth how to divine
a woman's age.

Y SON, enter not into flirta-

tion with the next-door dam-

sel, nor with her in the same
apartment-house shalt thou have dal-
liance; lest, when the time cometh, thou
canst not flee from her.

 

 
2 For as the taste of water after
grapefruit, so is the sight of her with
whom thou hast ended a romance.

3 Q Women of understanding have I
known upward of a thousand; but of
them that would leave a theatre before
the end of a dull play, nay, not one.

4 As a couch with cushions, so is a
wedded twain with separate incomes;
but she that must ask for money is as a
broken armchair whereof one caster is
missing.

5 @Goods in the piece seemeth to
excel that which is made up into a
gown; and she whom thou extolleth
when single shalt thou grumble at when
wed.

6 A broken garter embarrasseth a
woman; yet when she breaketh her word
is she not ashamed.

7 @ Now there was a damsel in Meso-
potamia, and she had nine and _ thirty
years; yea, forty years was the figure of
her age.

 

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 14.

8 For I discovered her age; and that
which she had hidden in her breast, the
same was made clear unto me. And in
this wise was the the manner of my
knowing.

9 For I spake unto her, saying:
Behold, I have regarded thy friend
Sarah, and much have I wondered con-
cerning her. Tell me, therefore, what
is her age?

io And she answered bitterly, and
said: Lo, she is a cat; for this day hath
she not declared unto me that her years
are only five and thirty? The idea!

iz And again I spake unto that dam-
sel, concerning another one, saying,
How old then is Miriam? For she saith
that she is forty.

12 And the damsel smiled, and made
answer, Nay, not so. For she is only
five and thirty.

13 And I knew that she whom I had
questioned was forty. Behold, had she
not considered five and thirty as a

 

 

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 15.

youthful age, and spake she not long-
ingly concerning it?

14 For lo, I say unto thee: By that
word only shall she be judged; and
for that did I add five years.

Chapter xv

The discomfort of innocence. 3 The patriarch
sheweth how blondes obtain repute for comelt-
nesson account of their hair alone. 9 Not to
boast of knowing women. 33 Maternity like
bargains.

S A NEW TOWEL which irketh
the hands, or as a high collar
fresh from the laundry, so is the

virgin that knoweth not the ways of
nature; she is chaste, yet stiff.

2 As glue upon the fingers, or as jam
on the spoon-handle, so to a wife is the
comely virgin that cajoleth her husband.
She cannot ignore it.

3 @Son, in my youth there was a
maiden, and her name was Dizzi, which,

 

 
ct e

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 15.

being translated, meaneth, She that
causeth men’s heads to turn. And she
was a full bright blonde.

4 Her hair was as of fine gold, inter-
mingled with silver,

5 So that the young men regarded her
curiously, saying: Behold she is passing
comely, yea, she is a peach.

6 And it came to pass that Dizzi
bedecked herself for the opera, setting
on her head a cap cunningly devised of
much fine lace and ribbon. And it
covered up her hair.

7 And when she took her place in
her box, men wondered concerning her,
saying: Lo, who is the hag, and what
doth she amongst the damsels of Nod?
For she is a sight, causing men to turn
away their heads; yea, she hath stopped
all the clocks in the city.

8 Verily, verily, I say unto thee:
Thou shalt not judge a blonde, whether
she be comely, till her hair be hidden;
and as for a man, when he shaveth his

 
 

 

mustache, fhen canst thou say: Behold,
he is handsome.

9 @As a piano playing in the next
flat at midnight, so is the man that
boasteth himself to know women. For
his neighbors shall knock mightily, till
he be silenced.

10 Women use many words, and
their talk causeth weariness, but a man
that repeateth the same tale ofttimes,
who can bear?

1m @My son, I beheld two women;
the one discoursing of the bargain she
had secured, and the other that told of
her infant, and behold their eyes had a
strange light, and they were as sisters
twain.

12 As an eye to a blind man, or asa
leg to the lame, so is a discerning woman
friend to one having not observation.

13 And as for that company wherein
is no comely damsel nor any clever man
found, thou shalt name it Bochim, which
is to say: The Place of Weeping.

»
a

Prssecicine nil

eer eee atsh ny

Se se

FE

cop naereet
Sat Sane.

t

Pm iase g

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 16.

Chapter xbi

Divers observations concerning men and wom-
en. 5 Amorous aspect of cigarettes. 7
Table manners. 8 Four subtile things. 12
The afternoon tea and its perils. 15 The tame
love-letter.

LIVELY LIMERICK doeth
good like a medicine; but the
recital of a dream drieth up the

bones.

2 It is as sport to a woman to keep
a man talking of himself, but he of
understanding preferreth reading her
palms.

3 As an elevator that stoppeth sud-
denly, so is a woman’s now don’t! to a
man that hath been over-bold.

4 Behold, the business man keepeth
the photograph of his wife before him
in the roll-top desk; yet is his sfenog-
rapher not afraid thereof.

5 @Son, if there be two women, the

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 16.

one that smoketh, and the other that
refraineth from cigarettes, which shalt
thou the easier kiss?

6 Lo, I say unto thee, choose thou
she that caresseth her cigarette, for she
shall be the first to caress thee.

7 QA comely virgin may eat with her
fingers and get away with it; but when
she that is fat and fifty cougheth, then
let me turn away my head.

8 @There be three things subtile, yea,
four that display much cunning:

9 A fly that leapeth from the ceiling,
for no man knoweth his motion.

1o A trained seal; and a mongoose,
also; and a jealous woman that suspect-
eth her friend.

11 QA she-doctor is an abomination
unto me; but a female woman is my
delight.

12 @ Who hath woe? Who hath ear-
ache? Who hath babbling? Who hath
a splitting of the head?

13 He that tarryeth long at the tea,

 

RM

Zs

nants tS OTAISISTSR

STRSTR ESR Gaares earthen eM

ge cor aR tates UIP OE

he
Re

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 17.

he that seeketh mixed society at five
o'clock.

14 Can one lick a frosty door-knob
and not lose skin? So he that kisseth
a widow shall not easily escape.

15 QA letter deferred maketh the
heart sick; but, when it cometh, it may
begin: Dear Friend.

16 A man hath joy by a Colorado
Perfecto; and a newspaper that hath
not yet been opened by a woman, how
good is it!

Chapter xvii

1 The Patriarch, to persuade obedience, giveth
divers wise counsels touching flirtations, se-
crets, poems and the like. ‘10 Sundry kinds of
fools. 13 Certain women to be avotded, tn-
cluding 34 the suffragette.

OW THEREFORE hearken, O
N my son, unto the statutes and
unto the judgments which I
teach thee, for to do them, that thou

 

 
THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 17.

mayest live in peace and possess the
love of women.

2 For the dub is in wrong, and know-
eth it not; but he that hath understand-
ing, shall work his will and have many
a laugh.

3 And these are the judgments that
thou shalt set before thee, when thou
walkest with women:

4 If thou hast a favorite damsel, then
shalt thou not flirt with her sister, nor
with her friend, nor with others of her
set; but with her whom she knoweth
not mayest thou flirt freely.

5 Yet shalt thou not bring together
the twain, lest trouble arise.

6 Thou shalt not tell thy secrets to
a maiden that is enamored of a man,
nor to a wife that loveth her husband,
lest she betray thee. And with him that
adoreth his wife, and him that is
enamored of a woman, shalt thou keep

thy mouth shut; for he will surely tell.
7 When thou hast met a damsel, say

semen ER SERET RRL TNR RS ete AI REM TST ETN

A
;
6
i
t
4
§

yt RTE
Fares aU AREER MRS 9

BSE

aL

439,

 
me Br i cage wast}

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 17.

not so-and-so regarding her, neither
shalt thou utter any unkind word. For
peradventure thou shalt fall in love }
with her fafer, and be much discom-
fited.

8 Thou shalt not make surreptitious |
love to a wife in the presence of her |
husband, and as for the damsel that is
with her lover, thou shalt not press her }
foot under the table, lest thou be named
Cad.

g The same poem to two different
damsels shalt thou not send, and what
thou sayest to the one thou shalt not say
to the other also.

10 @Saith the fool: If my life were
writ down as if really happened, there
is no novel that might compare with it.
Yet doth his tale bore me.

11 J haven't slept a wink all night,
saith the damsel; and the foolish youth
remarketh the splendor of her eyes, as
she had intended. g

12 Where is she that deemeth not

 

 
re

rot a dahl

 

 

 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 18.

that she would have made a great act-
ress? And as for him that hath not
written a play, I have not found him.

13 (Put away a woman who writeth
**Personal’’ upon her envelopes; and she
that useth sealing-wax, put her far from
thee.

14 QWhy wilt thou, O my son, be
ravished with a suffragette, and embrace
her that preferreth her rights to her
privileges?

Chapter xbttt

1 Black walnut furniture ana 2 auctioneers Tik-
ened to certainwomen. 3 The tyranny of style.
6 Ina parable of his youth, Noah exhorteth to
discretion and 18 not to butt in. 19 Vulgar men.

S A MARBLE SLAB on a table

of black walnut, so is a brown

switch on the gray hairs of a
grandmother.

2 @ Going, going, calleth the

poms tae BONIS OME HTS

 

 
THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 18.

tioneer, yet delayeth the gone; so in her
heart the damsel crieth: It is finished,
my youth is nearly over.

3 QA light purse is an annoyance,
but a small hat out of style, who can
endure it?

4 Furs on a warm day cause much
discomfort, yet she that weareth sables
deemeth it alqways cold.

5 A woman without taste is a trial to
her friends; and she that buyeth her

husband’s neckties causeth him to
become a byword and a hissing.

6 (Now in the days of my youth
there was a man in the Land of Nod,
and his name was Simp, which is to say:
He that is fooled of women. And he
was my friend.

7 And there was a maiden in that
land, a passing comely damsel, and her
name was Gai. And of her were many
strange tales told.

8 And it came to pass that Simp fell
enamored of Gai, and she found favor

 

 
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4 9

 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 18.

in his sight, so that upon her he spent
much time and substance.

g Wherefore his parents waxed sore,
saying unto him: Behold, she is a fro-
ward woman; it is not fitting that thou
shouldst encourage her. Put her, there-
fore, away from thee, and seek another,
a seemly virgin.

10 Then came Simp unto me and
besought me, saying: What fhinkest
thou now of Gai, whether she be all
right? For I am doubtful concerning
her, and would not be taken by her
wiles.

1z And I made answer, saying: She
is not a lady, neither is she worthy to
become thy wife. For she is a froward
woman, and vulgar, withal.

12 Then said Simp unto me: If then
thou art verily my friend, and if thou
wouldst busy thyself for my sake, do
what I bid thee:

13 Go now unto Gai and revile me
privily, that she may cast me off, and

sore eS

OP

 

 

PAUSES EI

 
 

   

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 18.

I may escape her clutches; so shall I
be grateful to thee forever more.

14 And I went up to Gai, and spake
much ill concerning Simp, telling her
the things he had counselled; yea, I
roasted him mightily, so that there was
left, nay, not one good thing in him.

15 And I left her in tears, and went
my way rejoicing that I had freed him
even from her wiles.

16 And in seven days I read news of
Simp and Gai in the papers; for behold,
they were married.

17 And so was I rewarded of my folly,
lo, I was in wrong; for I dared not
‘ approach him, nor his wife, nor his
f parents, nor anything that was his for-
ever after.

18 Q Advise not a man in his loves,
neither meddle with his affairs; and if
a woman ask thee for counsel, keep thou
thy mouth shut.

19 @He who holdeth a cigar in the
corners of his mouth insulteth a woman;

 

 
Paar

a

PP

 

 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 19.

but whoso discerneth her gray hairs
shall cause her to gnash her teeth.

Chapter xix

1 Noah presents the one sublime truth in regard to
women. 3 Sundry suggestive analogies noted.
6 Men and women compared as to their differ-
ences, and 10 as to their resemblances. 33
Divers follies of men to be aboided.

ON, IN THE BOOK I have
written, there be many precepts,
but in one only is the sum of all

wisdom:

2 If thou hast understanding, then
shall women be easy unto thee, but a
fool no man can enlighten.

3 GAs a tired magazine in a dentist’s
office, so is a divorced woman without
alimony; and she that is made up with
rouge, is like unto a bargain counter,
whereof the goods are marked down.

4 As comfortless as a man in a tea-

 

 
THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 19.

room, so is he that seeketh to divert a
damsel of twenty; for no man can
satisfy her.

5 A tight skirt bindeth the ankles, but
a tightwad maketh small the heart.

6 @The matron wotteth not whereof
her daughter thinketh, and her mother’s
secret thought would cause the maiden
to be astonied:

7 But the father knoweth his son, and
they have speech together, even as two
men of understanding.

8 A man, to gain favor, telleth his
secrets to a woman, yea, even for vain-
glory; but when a woman confideth in
thee, it is for love alone.

9 It is as sport for a woman to beguile
a man; yet for a man to fool a woman
in love it is hard labor.

10 @Lo, the damsel enamelleth her
face with craft, thinking that no one
shall know, and the youth cheweth gum
slyly, deeming to escape observation;
but only the fool is deceived therein.

 

 
Hi
fi
g
Ba
z
me?
a
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OT:

tS MN RE

 

 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH,

iz As a man ina dented Derby, so is
the kittenish old matron; they know
not why their neighbors regard them,
they are blind to their folly.

12 The damsel yawneth, she tappeth
her lips with her fingers, yet can she
not conceal her solecism; so doth a man
that no longer loves a woman, seek to
hide the truth.

13 @Whoso is fond of the wineglass
is to be avoided, but he that is fond of
the looking-glass who can endure?

14 A moustache is a vain thing, and
beards are grown for man’s conceit; yet
to shave them off sheweth vanity of
vanities.

15 Surely the mixing of drinks bring-
eth forth intoxication; so to play at
hearts with two women af once bringeth
forth trouble.

16 Son, ere thou becomest a sof? old
man, put the knife to thy throat; for the
waitress crieth out against him, and the
shop girl cannot endure it, yea, the hotel

 

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 20.

telephone operator saith: it is too much,
he maketh me sick.

Chapter xx

1 Of the ending of love. 3 The ways of comely
aqwomen. 5 Sundry wiles of damsels. 9 The
humble daughter-inlaw. 11 Not to boast over
women. 14 Anexhorta'ion to avotd the timidity
of the dub.

OONER SHALL a woman stop a
trolley-car that refuseth to admit
her, than detain a love that pass-

eth away.

2 Son, when she seeth thee clearly
without illusion, and when she knoweth
thee as thou really art, then hath her
love ended.

3 @Comeliness winneth in the dash,
but she that hath understanding tri-
umpheth in the long run,

4 An ill-favored damsel jumpeth at
the first chance, but the comely virgin
remaineth single until it is foo [ate.

 

 
 

 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 20.

5 GAs one that weareth a low-necked
gown with a high gauze collar, so is she
whose words are discreet, while her eye
winketh.

6 Hair that groweth comely upon the
nape, it is a good thing; and she that
can use her hands expressively is to be
envied; but the woman who dresseth
quickly is beyond all praise.

7 Lo, if she be too ill to receive thee,
perchance art thou not desired.

8 John is a name passing common
amongst men, and they that are called
Smith are many in the land; yet still
more often shalt thou find women’s
virtue united to stupidity.

9 QLo, the damsel that marrieth
above her striveth to make good, she
struggleth to please his family, yet doth
her husband’s mother eye her askance,
and her sisters-in-law snub her;

10 Yet when her babe is born, then is
she taken into the household, and the
old lady saith: Come now with us and

 

 

 

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 20.

take thy place, for thou art the mother
of my son’s son. f

tr @As the fur-collared overcoat |
goeth oft with a shabby hat, so goeth |
alway a fool’s vaunts over women with
his accomplishment.

12 My son, it is better to be a young
fifty than an old forty; but the parent
whose babes sicken shall not escape
middle age.

13 It irketh not the maiden when
thou extolleth her frock, yet if peradven-
ture thou hast seen it before and said
nothing, then are thy words as a hair in
her mouth.

14 @Behold the foolish lover, mark
his ways to avoid them, for he is simple,
and knoweth not women; yea, the dam-
sels wink their eyes when he cometh.

15 He kisseth not a woman till he
hath asked her permission; he desireth
his way to be made straight.

16 He stayeth too late, and he calleth
too often.

 

 
THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 21.

17 He proposeth by letter, writing
what he dare not say, face to face.

18 A wise man wrappeth not a
diamond in a newspaper, neither doth a
man of understanding take a damsel to
a dance in a trolley car.

Chapter xxt

Under the type of an X ts shewed man’s prog-

ress in friendship with a woman, from ac-

quaintance onward. 9 Platonic love always to
deceive its victims. 10 Man's divers follies.

17 Women different with men than with wom-

en. 19 The pleasures of travel.

HOU ALSO, my Son, take unto

thee a tile, and lay it before thee,

and pourtray upon it an X. This
shall be a sign unto thee of thy friend-
ships with women.

2 For the floor of the X, even the line
upon the which it resteth, this shall be
the ground of acquaintance, whereon
shalt thou move freely; yea, backwards

i
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NOAH’S MAP OF LOVE; XXI, 1-8.
 

MAXIMS OF NOAH, 21.

and forwards shalt thou move, going
forth and returning. f

3 But the two legs of the X, going -up ¢
from the floor, shall be thou and thy
woman, drawing ever nearer in friend-
ship.

4 And at the point of crossing shall
two roads separate, and the left arm shall
be the higher friendship, and the right
arm Jove. And if thou goest on with the
woman, it shall be either on the right
arm or the left arm, the one or the other.
Thus is it written in the book of love.

5 Yet, when thou shalt have passed |
the crossing with her, and chosen thy
road, then canst thou in nowise return.

6 For if peradventure thou hast taken
the left fork, then canst thou not return
on the way and take the other; and if
thou hast chosen the right, then is the
left sealed unto thee.

7 For the higher friendship goeth not

 

 
gowsucanrey,

 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 21.

8 Thus shalt thou know whither thou
goest with a woman, and be not
deceived.

9 QLo, the bicycle and diavolo pass,
and ping-pong is long forgotten; but as
for the game of Platonic Love, it shall
endure forever, and many shall lose
thereat.

to @ Doth thy sister smile when thou
praiseth a damsel? Doth thy spouse lift
her eyebrows when her name is men-
tioned? Wax not wroth, but question
them, and gain understanding.

iz Behold, at some time in his life is
every man a dandy; so mayest thou
know that a woman loveth him, But
when he goeth about half shaved and
ill shorn, when he hath spots on his coat
and his trousers bag at the knees, then
hath he no love to comfort him.

12 Son, was it not said of old that
women are curious, and their tongues
babble unceasingly? Behold, I say unto
thee, one inquisitive man doeth more

 

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if Gene

 
THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 21.

rubbering than a village street in June.

13 Son, give the woman her way; for
when her point is accomplished, then
shall she surrender all she hath fought
for.

14 Can a man smoke a pipe and not
be perfumed thereby? Neither can one
breathe woman’s flattery and not be
made vain.

15 When my love said unto me: A
young man hath praised my comeliness,
then I could not bear it; yet when she
said: He calleth me ill-favored, then
also was I cast down.

16 Lo, the fool jollieth the waitress,
and thinketh in his heart she smileth for
him alone; yet when he is gone, another
cometh, and repeateth his words, and
behold, she maketh the same answers.
So is he who thinketh only by violets
and confectionery to win a woman; he
shall be as one of many.

17 @My Son, observe the damsel
when she converseth with her sisters;

 

 
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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 22.

behold, her countenance is lax, and her
nerves are weakened, yea, the brakes
are all on-

18 But when the young man cometh,
lo, then are all the lights lighted, and her
face wreatheth itself in smiles; yea, she
flieth as in an aeroplane freely, seeking
his approval.

1g @Son, when thou enterest the
trolley car, sit thee not down opposite
the most comely damsel, to regard her;
rather sit thee beside her, and observe
the faces of the men who scrutinize her;
thou be merry during all the journey.

Chapter xxii

1 Distressing facts of ebery day expertence. 2
The fatuous slattern and other follies of bain
women. 7 A parable of Noah, shewing the
subtilty of women’s warfare. 15 Celebrities
and marriage. 16 The universal pastime.

URLING HAIR on a man’s head
is an annoyance to me, and a
woman’s moustache is hard to

PSA SINS EY 2 RTOS OEP RT STR

 
THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 22.

bear; but an infant that talketh like a
graybeard distresseth me beyond all
measure.

2 @ Did I not reprove the slattern for
her disorder? Yet I laughed when she
said unto me: O, but J fight up so, at
night f

3 Lo, the virgins flock to the matinee,
and smite their hands together when the
comely actor entereth, saying: Behold
his raiment; is he not the swellest ever?

4 But the evening cometh, and he
that hath understanding, yea, though he
wear a celluloid collar, he shall prevail
over her.

5 Alack! saith the maiden, alack for
the rudeness of men, for they stare
unceasingly, and I go not forth upon the
streets of the city without encountering
their frowardness; I say unto thee, their
annoyance is fierce.

6 Yet another year passeth, and she

 

 
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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 22.

woe is me, for the young men do o
regard me! :

Mizraim, of Assyria, there were two act- | i
resses, and the name of the one was 5
Anji, and the name of the other was §
Zillah; and they were bitter enemies
from of old.

8 And it came to pass that Zillah 7

played before the king in the palace, and
by her comeliness found favor in his
sight.

g And when Anji looked upon the
scene and saw Zillah that she could not
act, yet did she smite her hands together
mightily, applauding her rival.

ro And I said unto Anji: Now where-
fore doest thou this thing, and why
applaudest thou thine enemy; for
behold Zillah is a stick.

11 And Anji answered me, saying:
Verily, verily, know I well that Zillah
acteth like a telephone girl who hath
been two weeks in a dramatic school.

 

 
THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 22.

12 Yet, because she is mine enemy,
therefore must I applaud her, lest she
smile, saying: Lo, I have done exceed-
ing well, for my rival frowneth and
clappeth not her hands; great is my
rejoicing. Yet I would that she hissed
me with her lips, that my victory might
be complete.

13 But now is Zillah discomfited, for
she knoweth not what I think.

14 And thus did Anji prevail over
Zillah in the moment of her triumph.

15 @The wife of a celebrity, yea,
though she hath been a cook, is raised
up to his power, and the people seek
her with flattery; but the husband of
a famous woman, he is as nothing, and
his shame is great.

16 @The graybeard playeth at golf,
and the youth diverteth himself with
tennis; yet do all men play at love, and
the fool ofttimes wins thereat.

17 It is ever the homely woman who
maketh a show of herself in public.

 

 
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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 23.

Chapter xxitt

J The soft young man. 2 Indtscretion of amorous
qomen. 4 The embarrassments of a gover-
ness. 5 Where fashions begin. 6 The inex-
perienced fiancé. 7 A parable of a subtile man
that defeated awoman'swile. 14 Women’s
help and hindrance to men.

DYED DRESS is not to be con-

cealed from a woman’s eyes;

neither is a soft young man with-
out the contempt of his fellows.

2 @ Stolen kisses are sweet, and hands
held in secret are pleasant,

3 But he knoweth not that indiscre-
tion is there, and when he hath gone,
then will she fe/f all the details to her
sisters without shame.

4 QJ As conspicuous as an opera cos-
tume in a trolley car, so is the youth
who visiteth a goberness; the matron
regardeth him with subtilty, and the
daughters of the house cry: ha-ha, what

 

 
THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 23.

doeth the minx with a desirable young
man?

5 @The department store placardeth
its gowns, saying: This is the Latest; "ea.
yet do not women believe. Yet if a e
damsel be froward and without virtue,
then do the matrons ask: What did she
have on ?

6 @ As a faded terra cotta plume on a
new hat, so is a woman’s lover, who
hath not known other women. She
rejoiceth not over them.

7 GQ Now there was a young man in
Cush, and his name was Jobab. And
Jobab was a subtile man.

8 And it came to pass that a damsel
fell enamored of Jobab, but she found
not favor in his sight, for she was slow
in the head; yet did she strive mightily
to win him.

g And on a day, Jobab received a let-
ter from the hand of the damsel, and it
was a wonder, with much fine writing.

io Then said his brother unto Jobab:

 

 

 
 

Lo, where got the damsel her rhetoric,
and from what book hath she gained
her figures of speech? Yet, though she
hath eaten the dictionary, still must
thou praise her.

11 But Jobab made answer, saying,
Nay, not so; and as for the letter,
I shall ignore it, lest the damsel say, Lo,
now have I made a hit.

12 And again his brother said unto
him: Write thou then unto the damsel
and accuse her, shewing that thou hast
discovered the source of her wit.

13 And Jobab answered and said: O
thou fool; for, to a woman, an insult is
void and without sting, if she has
accomplished her purpose, therefore do
I hold my peace lest the damsel say:
Behold, I have made him sit up and take
notice.

14 @ My son, seest thou a man who
hath attained success? Seek thou the
woman upon whom his mind doth lean.

15 My Son, when a stranger ap-

 

 
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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 24.

proacheth, trust a maiden’s intuition;
but beware her prejudice when a friend
draweth nigh.

16 As the invisible hairpin hangeth
insecurely upon the stray lock, depend-
ing upon a hair, so do women’s reasons
depend upon their desires.

17 A tactful woman winneth over
goddesses and queens.

Chapter xxtb

1 What things may not be chewed in the presence
of women. 8 What foods to be avoided. 9
Unlawful perfumes and 10 other abominable
practices. 11 Profanity and its forfeits. 13.A
repetition of sundry laws of soctal kindness
17 Of him that observeth the maxims.

ND THESE are the things which
A thou shalt have in abomination
amongst foods; when thou goest

among Yomen they shall not be chewed,

they are abomination: the clove, and the
flagroot and the licorice,

 

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 24.

2 And all gums after their kind,
3 And the spearmint and the pepper-
mint after its kind,

4 And hoarhound and cachous, and =

cinnamon, and tobacco,

5 And the caraway, and the anise,
and the cardamom, and all seeds after
their kind;

6 Aff things that cause the breath to
stink, the same shall be abomination
unto thee,

7 And for that shalt thou be unclean,
whosoever cheweth them shall be un-
clean for three score and six days.

8 @ Neither shalt thou eat anything
that causeth the breath to stink before
thou callest upon a woman, whether it
be garlic, or onions, or herrings, or
cheese after its kind.

9 @ Thou shalt not perfume thy hand-
kerchief, it is abomination; and if it be
made of silk, it is abomination, it shall be
burned with fire.

10 @ Thou shalt not curl the corners

 

 
THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 24.

of thy moustache, neither shalt thou dye
it with dyes, like unto a policeman, it
is abomination.

11 QOr if a man swear, pronouncing
with his lips damn and hell, or whatso- |
ever it is that a man shall pronounce |
With an oath before women, then he }
shall be guilty, :

12 And he shall bring his trespass
offering unto her, for his sin which he
hath sinned, a book, or a box of candy,

or flowers for a sin offering, and the }
damsel shall make an atonement for him

concerning his sin.

13 @Thou shalt rise up in the street-
car before the hoary head, and honor
the face of the old lady with bundles,
to give her thy seat.

14 And thou shalt not laugh at the
widow, or the grass widow, or the
mother-in-law, or the stepmother, or the
old maid, or the wall-flower, to make a
jest of her,

15 Neither a fat man, nor a drunkard,

 

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 25.

nor him that hath a black eye, or a red
nose, or anything superfluous,

16 Nor a musician, nor a dentist, nor
one that hath a baldness upon his head,
these shalt thou not laugh at, to make
them a scoffing.

17 G And thou shalt be a gentleman;
for I have severed thee from other
people, that thou shouldst be my pride
and beloved of women.

Chapter xxb

4 The perils in woman’s memory. 3 Man's divers
misfortunes. 5 Noah discovereth the secret
tanguage of women, counselling men to study tt.
10 Actors ana actresses. 11 A comely woman
can afford to pratse her inferior. 13 Woman's
perpetual credulity. 14 Upon marriages of
sorts. 16 Divers maxims.

Y SON, what thou doest for a
woman, she may forget, but
what thou hast failed to do,

that will she always remember.
2 When she is enraged, when her

rer SHEEN

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eon

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 25.

tears burst forth in anger, then mayest
thou laugh; but if peradventure she
say nothing, and abide her time, then
shalt thou beware.

3 QSon, hast thou observed the coun-
tenance of the married man? Lo, who
can endure the daily sight of a matron
at her dressing, and not be made old?

4 A. slow-filling bathtub exciteth
impatience, and to wait long for a tele-
phone call disturbeth the heart; but he
who delayeth to pass the cigars after the
coffee is served, the same shall have his
dinner cursed.

5 QLo, two languages speaketh one
woman to another, one speech that is
audible, and another speech that goeth
on unheard.

6 And the audible speech is folly,
meaning nothing; but the inaudible
conversation felleth her hidden thought.

7 Incline thy mind, therefore, and

study to observe women, that their Gabe

secret ways may be made plain; for of

 

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 25.

this language all women have under-
standing, but men, being fools, believe
not.

8 For at the afternoon tea, I beheld
two damsels talking, and their speech
was of laces and linen and cold cream;
and the men smiled, saying: Behold,
how these two love one another !

g But verily, verily, I say unto thee,
they were engaged in deadly strife; yea,

they gave wounds that the eye saw not,
and uttered curses that the ear did not

hear.

10 @In the home of the actor, there
are seven and thirty pictures of himself
found, and where the actress lives, there
are many mirrors.

11 Q She is fair, she is fair, saith the
damsel; so mayest thou know that she
that is praised hath not comeliness to
compare with her who flattereth, for she
can afford to be generous.

12 But when her rival approacheth,
when she that competeth in beauty, then

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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 25.

doth the damsel say, Lo, she is but so-so,
and I prefer brown eyes. Yet are not
her tresses so bad, if peradventure she
knew how to do up her hair.

13 QA stye on the eye may be healed,
and a boil on the neck will in time be
cured, but she who believeth in palmistry
and the soothsayer cannot recover.

14 QAs two postage stamps that are
stuck one to another, so is the marriage
of a young man and a rich wife.

15 The window curtain escapeth from
the fingers, it rasheth away with a fierce
cry; so doth a maiden when she findeth
that her young man is married. He is
as the umbrella which hath been blown
inside out; there is no more virtue in
him.

16 GAs one that fumbleth in her
purse, saying: Oh, fet me pay / yet delay-
eth her offering, so is the youth that
offereth to see the ill-favored maiden
home from the party.

17 A red-haired damsel hath a clear

 

 
 

 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 26.

complexion, but she that despiseth
bridge hath a clear head.

18 Son, I am old, and have .been
young, yet have I not learned why the
matron sitteth bolt upright in the street-
car; and why she leaneth not back in
comfort, the same is a secret from me.

19 To teach an ugly damsel to skate,
is a bore, and instructing an aged aunt
in swimming is without pleasure; neither
doth a woman enjoy shewing her young
man how to make love.

Chapter xxi

The Patriarch, in a Parable of Women, sheweth
how thetr anxiety to marry consumeth them
utterly owing to men’s dalliance and phil-
andering.

A Song of Noah, when he changed his be-
havior before his wife Naamah; who drave
him away, and he departed.

N THE HOUSE OF THE WO.-
MEN, the damsels cry: Long, long,
have we awaited ;

 

 

MORSE REDNESS a en eT UFOS

 
THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 26.

2 Eight nights a week hath the young
man called, yet have we not heard his
proposal; yea, for seven years hath he
waited upon us, and safd no word.

3 Our mothers have questioned us
privily, and our fathers have said: How
long, how long ?

4 What shall we do, that the young
man shall speak, and how shall we con-
trive that he shall not escape us? With
what guile shall we practise to capture
him, and in what manner shall we direct
his feet?

5 Surely comeliness and virtue have
been with us all the days of our life, and
we have walked in the paths of flattery
forever.

6 What he hath done hath seemed
good in our sight, and to what he hath
said we have answered in words of
praise; yet hath he not spoken of mar-
riage.

7 Now are we forsaken of the desir-
able young men, yea, the young men of

 

 
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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 26.

promise visit us no more; and while he
remaineth sitting in the parlor, and while
the gas-bill mounteth, surely have we
no other chance.

8 Yet another year, and we shall wax
old, and in another season may he pass
us by; for the day cometh when we shall
look into the mirror and say, Lo, there
are divers gray hairs.

9 We have said in our hearts: This
day will he surely speak, and when his
salary hath been raised, then did we
hope; yet hath he not opened his lips in
proposal, neither hath he requested our
hand.

10 What shall we say to the young
man to encourage him, and with what
speech shall we make his way easy,
when his heart fainteth?

rz For his silence is bitter unto us,
yea, his silence is like a wall upon which
we break our shins, and we know not the
meaning of it. His obstinacy passeth
our understanding,

 

 
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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 27.

12 O Lord, what meaneth the young
man to do? And what are his desires
concerning us? Tell us, that we may
make our plans.

13 Behold, the virgin is a mystery,
and the heart of a matron is hard to find
out; but a young man excelleth them all |
in subtilty.

Chapter xxbit

Noah, shewing another room in the House of
Women, discovereth their woe at the sameness
of their suttors and their thirst for romance
mocked with the commonplace.

To his son Shem’s wife, Zedeketelbab, for
her daughters when she said: Lo, there is
none good enough for them; A Song of
Noah.

N THE HOUSE OF THE WO-
MEN the damseis cry: Verily,
Verily, there is no new thing !

2 One man is like unto another, in
this world, and what Obal doeth, that
doth Tiras also. j

3 He taketh us to the theatres, he

 

 

 
 

 

 

PP ie Set

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 27.

bringeth us violets and confectionery;
yea, in the cabs of the city are we
brought to much dances.

4 Yet Tuesday differeth not from
Thursday, and neither on Saturday is
there any joy found.

5 Where is he that hath slain men in
his wrath? And as for him that causeth
us to bow down in worship, we have not
seen him.

6 For surely we would fain be mas-
tered with his might, we would be swept
off our feet by him that hath loving
strength.

7 Behold, no man maketh us afraid,
and when our best young men approach
us, we do not tremble.

8 We have gone into the house of the
soothsayer, and he hath holden our
palms; yea, he hath glanced fierce
glances; we have followed the Oriental
mystic, and the dark, flashing tenor hath
ravished our hearts; yet have we found
no man fitting our hopes.

 

 

 
THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 28.

9g And behold, June approacheth in
the which shall we be made brides; and
our trousseaux are prepared against the
coming of the bridegroom;

to For the baker and the broker shall
lead us to the altar, and unto the insur-
ance agent shall we plight our troth.

iz And as for the vows we have
sworn in our youth, it is as if they were
not,

12 Verily, verily, even as our mothers
wedded, so shall we wed, also, and there
is no new thing under the sun.

Chapter xxbitt

The third floor of the House of Women, shewing
their immemorial envy concerning man’s free-
dom and knowledge of life.

To Neelatamauk, wife of Ham, when she
encouraged Canaan in his folly, yet denied
wisdom to her daughters, A Song of Noah.

N THE HOUSE OF THE WO-
MEN the damsels cry: Would that
we, too, had been born as men!

 

 
  
 
  

    

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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 28.

    
 
 
 
    

2 For women are deceitful and full of
guile, and verily there is no truth in
them.

3 As for men, they are simple, they
have eyes that see not, and ears that do fy
not hear; yet do they prevail over 4 7 | if
us. , tee at

4 We do their will at their command, § 4
| and when they order, then, behold, we A
, must obey.

5 Have not our mothers said: Do
this, for thou arf a woman? And have
not our fathers forbidden us to go the
ways of men?

6 Our going out and our coming in
is known unto them, and when we seek
pleasure, then our lies must accomplish
it.

7 Yet do our brethren go out by the
door, and no one questioneth; they re-
turn at daybreak, and are not troubled.

8 Behold, the young man goeth forth
' alone, into all the streets of the city; he
seeth life, and the world is made known

 

  
  
 

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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 28.

unto him, yea, even unto the uttermost
parts thereof,

g But the maiden is bound in her
corset, and in narrow shoes are her feet
made fast to walk the narrow way. In
her skirts is she imprisoned and with her
gloved hand may she not touch the for-
bidden thing.

10 The latchkey is denied unto her,
yea, though she be seventy years and
seven, still is she a child in the eyes of
her mother.

11 How then shall we know adven-
ture, and as for romance, where shall we
find it?

12 How long, how long, O Lord, be-
fore the day of our freedom cometh?
And when shall we arrive at the years of
discretion, when it shall be said unto us:
Let thine own will be accomplished.

13 For if a maiden marrieth not then
is she a slave to the end of her days;
and if she join not the suffragettes then
are her lamentations unregarded.

 

 

 
 

SRSA A ROU AAESS

BRR SYS ew ceennscaeereeren

aoe og TLE 39

 

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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 28.

14 How beautiful upon the mountains
are the feet of him that bringeth violets,
that giveth candy; that delivereth good
books of worth, that saith unto us:
Behold all these it is proper to bring
unto thee, for a damsel may receive them
of a youth, thus saith the Ladies’ Home
Journal.

15 Yet the virgins break not forth into
joy, neither do they sing together, he
doth not comfort them, and they cry:
Depart ye, depart ye, go out from us
into the waste places, we cannot abide
thee, behold, thou dealest too prudently.

16 But the messenger of joy is made
welcome, and he who delighteth us with
secret pleasures enjoyeth much favor.
For behold, he bringeth wisdom and
understanding, and all that was with-
holden from our propriety the same is
vouchsafed unto us.

17 Innocence is precious unto us, and
virtue is above rubies, but as for igno-
we loathe it. We would not

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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 29.

pretend alway, for our days are vanity.
18 What is man that he should be
magnified, and wherefore is it that he
should possess all wisdom?
1g For we are as flax standing, and
it is better that we be burned with fire
than that we wither away.

Chapter xxix

A parable of mother-love, shewing the mystery
unknown of men, whereof women say: Until
thou hast known this thing, thou art not !

To Adataneses, wife of Japheth, when she
bare Gomer, her first-born.

OW IN THE City of Enoch there

dwelt two virgins; and the name

of one was Mary and the name
of the other was Ruth. And they loved
each other with an exceeding great love,
passing the love of women, so that
what one knew, the other knew also;
and their thought passed from one unto
the other without words.

 

 
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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 29.

2 And it came to pass that when Mary
came of age, she was taken to wife by
a youth of Assyria; and when she had
dwelt with him for a twelve-month, a
babe was born unto them.

3 Then came Ruth from out of the
City of Enoch unto Mary, to rejoice with
her. And when Ruth had seen the babe,
she spake, saying:

4 Is it not well with the love we have
sworn one to the other, and doth not the
old tie bind us? Behold, I have rejoiced
with thy joy, and thy thought is my

thought, as in the days of our youth.

5 Then Mary answered and said:
Surely it is well with our love, and the
old tie bindeth us. But as for my joy,
thou knowest not how to rejoice with
me.

6 And Ruth bowed her head and
wept, saying: Wherefore sayest thou so,
sister? Know I not what thou knowest,
and doth not thy thought pass unto me
without speech, as of old?

 

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THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 29.

7 Then said Mary unto Ruth: Behold
my babe, flesh of my flesh, and bone of }
my bone, as it were mine arm living, or |
mine eye which seeth strange things.
Lo, I am divided in twain, the babe and
I, and I know not which is myself. His
sorrow is my sorrow, and his joy is my
joy, but not as it hath been with us
twain in the days of our youth.

8 For behold, then I loved thee as one
friend loveth another, passing the love
of women; yet now I love thee in that
thou art the child of a woman whose
heart hungereth for thee. For betwixt
thy mother’s heart and my heart there
is a bond exceeding the bond betwixt
thee and me.

9 Verily, verily, I say unto thee, It
is past thine understanding, for thou
hast not borne a child. For it is a thing
the mind knoweth not, neither can the
lips speak concerning it.

to And Ruth went her way, sorrow-
ing. And it came to pass that after a

 

 

 
THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 29.

time she espoused a man of the City of
Enoch, and she bare him a man-child.
And her son died in his first year.

iz Then came Mary from out of
Assyria to sorrow with Ruth in her afflic-
tion, and when she had come unto her
she spake, saying:

12 Is it not well with the love we have
sworn, one to another, and doth not the
old tie bind us ? Behold, I have sor-

rowed with thy sorrow, and thy thought
is my thought, as in the days of our
youth.

13 For now is thine understanding
made perfect, for thou hast been a
mother.

14 And Ruth answered her, saying:
Surely it is well with our love, and the
old tie bindeth us. But as for my sor-
row, thou hast not suffered it.

15 And Mary bowed her head and
wept, saying:

16 Wherefore sayest thou so, sister?
Know I not what thou knowest, and

ueepsguiommes.

 

 

 

 

 

 
 

THE MAXIMS OF NOAH, 29.

doth not thy thought pass unto me with-
out speech, as of old?

17 Then said Ruth unto Mary: Nay,
Say not so. Go thy way, sister, and
when it shall come to pass that the Lord
shall take away thy son, and he shall die,
then shalt thou return unto me, and my
thought shall pass unto thee without
speech.

18 And thy sorrow shalt be my sor-
row, and my joy thy joy, even as it was
in the days of our youth.

19 For not yet is thine understanding
made perfect, for thou hast not seen thy
child perish.

20 For verily, verily, I say unto thee,
it is a thing the mind knoweth not,
neither can the lips speak concerning it.

SELAH

 

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